#i cannot write 100 words apparently

[gravitywonagain]

400 words on a’yuan’s first time cursing in front of his dad

.🤬.

Lan Yuan freezes. He feels the hair on his arms prickle, rising on end. He’s standing on one foot, holding the smallest toe of his other tightly in his fist. It hurts. Even with his whole body frozen stiff, it hurts. A sharp throb that had ricocheted up to his knee and back down to his toenail, but had somehow come out through his mouth.

He turns slowly, his own words ringing loudly in his ears.

Hanguang Jun looks similarly frozen in place. Shocked still like the rabbits in the meadow when Jingyi forgets not to shout.

“Where did you learn that phrase, A’Yuan?” he asks, voice low and gentle.

Lan Yuan looks down at the leg of the table. It appears entirely unconcerned with the drama it has caused. Not even a scuff mark for his trouble.

He looks back up to the man he privately considers to be his father. The man who has been with him for the past four years. The man he’d do anything not to disappoint.

Hanguang Jun doesn’t look mad, though Lan Yuan gets the feeling that anger might just slide off his face, unable to stick, like ink on waxed paper.

“I don’t know,” Lan Yuan answers honestly. In his mind the cadence is rough like untilled soil and the words are the color of fresh cinnabar. But he doesn’t know why. There isn’t a memory to call up so much as an emotion, an instinctual vocal response to pain. “I think I heard it somewhere.”

It’s unlikely he heard the phrase in the Cloud Recesses. Profanity is forbidden. But it doesn’t sound like it would fit into the tongue-tripping Gusu dialect he hears on their day trips down to the Caiyi markets either.

Hanguang Jun still hasn’t moved. His posture is rigid and strange. His eyes are aimed toward Lan Yuan, but they’re not looking at him. Not seeing him. Hazy and far away and… wet?

A small smile lifts the corner of Hanguang Jun’s mouth. He hums.

Then his eyes seem to focus back on Lan Yuan. He says, soft but stern, “Profanity is forbidden. You will copy Conduct.”

Lan Yuan drops his foot to the floor, the pain already forgotten, and bows his apology.

When he rises, the smile is still there.

Then Hanguang Jun adds, “On your hands,” and Lan Yuan fights not to say the phrase again.

[loviatarsluv]

An Acquired Taste

“You play a twisted little game,

but I know in a way,

you need to complicate

believe that though we never eat,

we still know how to feed,

we still know how to bleed”

Astarion x AFAB female rogue tav (third person, no super descriptive features aside from hair color and body)

takes place earlier into act 1, long before the grove party (I have plans for that)

rating: VERY mature (smut incoming lets go besties!!!!!!)

CW: threats of bodily harm (eheh), lots of sexual tension, choking, fingering, oral, some light knifeplay

a/n: I’m gonna be 100% honest w u I have not written in forever so I’m admittedly very rusty, but I have not seen enough enemies to lovers with astarion and I just needed it so thus this was born ^.^

in summary: astarion and tav butt heads constantly and get into a blow up fight where they both say shit they shouldn’t, tav is overwhelmed by everything and he is not helping, so she goes to blow off some steam once they get back to camp and he, of course, petty as he is, cannot let her have a single moment of peace and follows her. she threatens to slit his throat and he gets horny. as one does 🤷‍♀️ (just like me fr)

word count: 7.6k (i'm so sorry i was possessed writing this apparently)

(I have no idea where I got this gif from if someone knows tell me and I’ll tag the op!!)

The trek back to camp is mostly silent, save for the odd comment about the weather or spew of stream of consciousness by Karlach, which provided at least a tiny bit of comic relief.

The air was thick and suffocating between the party’s leader and the vampire who just loved to piss her off - it almost always was slightly tense, but today in particular was much different than what was usual for them.

As soon as they reach the camp, the group splits, all scattering across the site to their own chosen sections of it, Astarion nonchalantly strolling off to his own tent, which just so happened to be the closest one to hers. She audibly growls in frustration, earning a few concerned stares from her companions. She can’t even find peace in her own tent.

Before any of her companions can stop her or inevitably approach her with questions about what happened between her and Astarion or unsolicited and, quite frankly, unnecessary advice, she slips off to the place that had been the one piece of solace she had been able to find as of late. The clearing in the forest near the water's edge that was just outside of camp.

The usually ataractic smell of petrichor mixed with the misty air near the running stream fill her nose as she trudges through the muddy soil, her leather and metal plated boots feeling ten stones heavier than usual. She sets her sights on a fallen tree near the water, sinking down into the dirt before it, releasing a long and deep breath that she didn’t realize she’d been holding for what felt like days.

She slowly strips off the outer layers of her lightly plated armor piece by piece, goosebumps prickling her skin with each new bit of skin exposed to the crisp evening air. She discovers a few new bruises and scrapes that hadn’t been there previously when removing certain parts of her gear had become painful, her skin tender and sore beneath it. Her entire body ached, and she was utterly sapped.

The previous few days had been more challenging than anything she’d experienced in recent history - their predicament unfolding before them all in increasingly bleak shades of stormy gray and blood red with each new bit of information they receive regarding the mystery surrounding the parasites that writhed within their skulls. She’d be lying if she said she still held the same amount of optimism toward the prospect of a cure as she had in the earlier days of their expedition. No, that was long gone.

In fact, the only emotion she seemed to feel lately was anger. Rage.

She knew that the world was going to shit prior to being abducted by the mind flayers, but she had never seen for herself how truly doomed it was the way she had since then. It was sobering, to say the least.

She never considered herself to be particularly altruistic or even virtuous by any means, having only been able to survive by picking pockets and slitting throats that stood in the way since her early teen years. She wasn’t proud of it all, and her mind was not unburdened with the guilt that came with some of it, but it was necessary at the time. It continued to be necessary, even more so now.

An image of home flashes through her mind - Baldur’s Gate. The bustling streets, the busy taverns, the upper city where she procured the majority of her coin. She chuckles to herself as she thinks of all of the nobles whose pockets she’d made lighter who were none the wiser  - hells, most of them probably never noticed as gold was never in short supply for them the way it was for the rest of the population. They were easy targets only due to their noses being so high in the air that they didn’t notice those beneath them, scrounging the streets for the crumbs they crushed beneath their perfectly polished boots.

All she had to do was bat her eyelashes, whisper the same sweet nothings that worked on every single one of them, and expertly slip her hand into their pockets while they were enchanted by her every move. It was easier than easy, it was effortless.

She almost misses it - things were simpler, then. It had all become routine after so many years of it. Of course, there was still the threat of death looming over her at every turn but at least she could put up a fight against the daggers and swords that were held to her throat - there was no fighting this. She couldn’t threaten the tadpole with knives or swords or warfare, and she certainly couldn’t fight off ceremorphosis by sheer willpower. Sure, she could cut through every goblin, drow, or cultist that dared cross her path if they didn’t offer a cure or information for a cure, but none of that mattered as the creature inside her was nothing more than a ticking time bomb. Every second that passes could be her last without tentacles and an insatiable appetite for brains, and she’d be rendered nothing more than a soulless monster, doomed to follow every command given to it by an even bigger monstrosity.

Her hope and faith in finding a solution deteriorated more and more as the days passed with no answers, no leads, the prospect of making it out on the other side of this predicament seeming ever more distant. 

She groans loudly to herself, tossing her head into her hands as she brings her knees closer to her chest, wishing she could shrink and disappear. Wishing the mud below her would form a sinkhole and just swallow her, that way it didn’t matter anymore, nothing would.

“Fuck,” She whispers through gritted teeth as she feels tears starting to well up in her eyes, much to her physical and internal protest.

In spite of her throbbing muscles and aching bones, she pushes herself up from the ground, refusing to resort to wallowing in self pity and mourning her once simple life.

But her chest feels as though it were caught in a vice, clamping down on her ribs and lungs and it felt as if she were fighting for every breath. Her fists were clenched so tightly and her nails dug into her palms so deeply that they were on the verge of drawing blood. She felt the need to scream, to cry, to break something - even though none of it would alleviate the weight that rested on her shoulders so heavily. Nothing that was within her reach could.

She felt like everything had come crashing down on her all at once and she was helpless to fight the barrage of what ifs and the potential outcomes of them flooded her mind.

Then, to top it all, her earlier argument with Astarion resurfaces in her mind.

“Apologies for not being as keen to remove the thing that has given me what I’ve been deprived of for two centuries. I’m only saying that we should—“

“So you’d trade feasting on rats in a dirty cell for feasting on brains at the command of some start-up god? You must really be desperate.”

His crimson eyes that were typically bright and playful were now dark and malignant, his jaw clenched and fangs bared. He looked as though he were about to lunge at her, before Wyll grabs him and pulls him back.

She regretted it the moment it left her lips, but she was too angry and too prideful to take it back. But he was seriously irking her - he provoked it out of her, she could hardly blame herself or feel sorry.

“What about you? Roaming the streets, scrounging through the garbage and the dirt for table scraps, stealing from nobles - you’re no better than the rats I fed on, the only difference is that the ones I fed on were more tolerable.”

It was then her turn to get pulled away, as within an instant her dagger was unsheathed and pointed in his direction. She couldn’t tell who it was that grabbed her - perhaps Gale, she thought, who was much stronger than he looked as he subdued her fairly quickly, wrapping his arms around her and dragging her backwards.

It took a lot of talking both of them down to diffuse the situation enough to safely make it back to camp in one piece, both of them too stubborn and prideful to let the matter rest until they just couldn’t stand to be near each other anymore.

His voice echoes in her head, reminding her of every person she’d ever reached out to for help in her life, degrading her to nothing more than a street rat begging for scraps. Her temper rises as she replays his words - “you’re no better than the rats I fed on” - over and over, finally tipping her over the edge. 

She retrieves her rapier from the heap she’d discarded her armor and clothes in, rushes toward a large oak tree, swinging it into the trunk over and over until there’s large slashes in the trunk, the bark flying in shards and bits.

She steps back, breath ragged and heavy, eyes burning with tears that she refused to shed, especially over him and his damned opinion.

She's too enthralled in her own outburst to notice the footsteps approaching in the forest behind her.

“And what exactly did that tree do to deserve your wrath?” Astarion taunts, slowly stalking up behind her.

She doesn’t turn to face him, nor does she acknowledge him at all, tossing her weapon to the ground and walking back toward the stream.

“Tsk, I’m getting the silent treatment now? No scathing insults or cruel comments regarding my past?” He continues to prod, following a few steps behind her.

“Fuck. Off.” She growls through gritted teeth.

He chuckles, the sound bitter and disingenuous, goading.

“Oh, darling. You couldn’t possibly think that we wouldn’t have to kiss and make up after our little spat earlier. We’re stuck with each other in this sordid endeavor, after all.”

Her knuckles have gone white with the force of her clutching onto the fabric of her undershirt that she’d thankfully left on, on the off chance one of her companions came to check on her. Much to her dismay, of course it was the one companion she wished she had never laid eyes on to begin with.

“I’d rather kiss a leech, darling,” she spits, her tone coated in vitriol. “I have nothing more to say to you, unless you’d like me to return the favor of holding a dagger to your throat.”

When they’d met outside the nautiloid crash, and the elf held her at knifepoint demanding information, assuming she was a thrall or working with the mind flayers, she thought perhaps they would get along. She immediately recognized him as a kindred spirit as she knew that she would’ve done the same in his shoes, hells, she was even attracted to him. 

Oh, how wrong she’d been.

Well, not about the attraction. That, unfortunately, did not dissipate.

If anything, it only made her hate him more.

He almost cackles, stalking in ever closer, closing the gap between them step by step. She resists the urge to step backwards to increase the distance between them once again, and stays planted in place out of spite, digging her heels into the dirt for extra support. 

“I think there’s a lot that we both want to say and do to each other - the question is who’ll be the first to act.” His voice is equal parts threatening and sultry - something only he did so well.

He could make you loathe him and lust him in one fell swoop with ease. It was one of his biggest strengths, and a large reason why she hadn’t told him to piss off and find another group to leech off of. He was useful in and out of battle, much to her dismay. 

“The only thing I want to do with you at this very moment is throw your pasty ass in the river and hope that you’ve forgotten how to swim.” She spat.

He continues to stalk closer, their bodies now less than a foot apart.

“You’re stubborn. I like that about you. You don’t accept defeat easily, even when it’s knocking at your door. It’s quite admirable, really,” he pauses to lean forward, lowering his face so they’re eye to eye.

“Admit it, dear, you’ve met your match with me.” He grins a devilish grin that she wants to slap off of his pretty mouth. If he were any closer, she might have.

“This isn’t a competition. I want to be rid of this damned thing and you want to step in the way of my and everyone else’s survival at every turn just for your own selfish sake!” She seethes, her voice raising and echoing through the woods.

He rolls his eyes. “Don’t act as though you give the slightest bit of a damn about anyone’s survival but your own, altruism isn’t a good look on you, pet. You and I are cut from the same cloth, whether you want to admit that to yourself or not.”

Her once empty fist was now grasping the handle of her dagger that she had sheathed and strapped to her thigh, as she always did, a habit that came in handy more times than she’d like for it to.

“I am nothing like you.” Is all she manages to hiss before he finally closes the gap between them, his face merely inches from hers, basically towering over her - their stark height difference being something only he had noticed and fully planned on using to his advantage.

He feels the heat radiating off of her, and he tells himself that it’s due to more than just anger to stroke his own ego. He knew that she was attracted to him, he’d caught her eyes lingering on him when she thought he wouldn’t notice - when he’d change into his evening clothes just outside his tent, when he would traipse off into the woods to hunt at night, and in general throughout their days traveling he would catch her eyes on him, watching him. It made it all the more exciting for him, knowing that even though she despised him, she’d let him have his way with her if the opportunity arose. He was just biding his time for the right moment and preparing all the perfect words that he knew would reduce her to putty in his hands.

“Keep telling yourself that, if it’ll help you sleep peacefully at night.” He whispers, his eyes dark and hungry - she couldn’t decipher whether it was for her or her blood in one way or another.

“How can I sleep peacefully knowing there’s a bloodsucker who hates me in the next tent over from me?” She half jokes, not letting this closeness falter her composure, despite the way her heart was racing a million a minute.

He flashes that damned smirk that he does when he’s up to something, one of his fangs peeking out over his bottom lip as he does, glinting in the golden glow of the sunset. He almost looked human, in this light. His usually pallid skin is nearly lively and his crimson eyes almost appear to be a shade of dark brown instead. Although, she thinks that his eyes were probably blue, before. Not that it mattered, not that she cared.

“What makes you think that I hate you, darling?” His face flashes a feign innocent expression, in spite of his eyes still holding that same intense darkness that bordered between disdain and desire.

“I certainly don’t think that you like me, by any means. And don’t worry, the feeling is mutual.”

His smirk widens into a sadistic grin, both fangs now on display.

“On the contrary, sweetness. I think we need to stop lying to each other if we’re going to continue this little adventure of ours together,” his voice is low and breathy, rumbling in his chest almost like a growl. He brings a hand up to trace the side of her jaw gently, and she flinches away.

“I’ve seen the way you look at me when you think I don’t notice.” He continues, his once gentle caress turning into a rough and forceful grab as he forces her to look at him, his blood red eyes boring into hers.

“I only watch you because I don’t trust you. I thought that’d be pretty clear.” It was a lie. She knew it was a lie, but it was only a half lie, technically. She didn’t trust him, she hadn’t since the beginning.

He lets out another cruel laugh, and she knows that he caught on.

“Hmm. You know, I’d assume you would be a better liar - how disappointing for you, but delicious for me.”

This was the last straw for her as she promptly unsheathes the dagger that her finger had been itching over since he made his unwelcome appearance into her life, pressing it to his throat, slowly pushing him backwards until his back hits the nearest tree.

His demeanor doesn’t falter for an instant, his face still twisted into that same demented sneer - the bastard was enjoying this.

The air between them was so thick it would have had to be cut with a great sword as their eye contact never breaks, neither of them intending to surrender.

“Give me one reason not to slit that pretty throat of yours.” She snarls behind gritted teeth.

He swallows hard, his Adam's apple grazing against the cool metal of her blade. He stares down at her and can’t help but admire her - eyes wild, long raven black hair uncharacteristically disheveled with some strands sticking to her forehead due to leftover dried sweat and grime, her pressed against him hard with only a flimsy shirt shielding her body from him. He doesn’t even try to hide it, letting his tongue slip out to wet his bottom lip, an undeniably lustful look in his eyes.

It takes her a moment to notice when she finally comes back to her senses after her adrenaline settles, a scowl painting across her face as the realization hits.

“You’re disgusting.” She hisses, pulling away from him, lowering her blade.

Despite her words, the way he was looking at her sparked something in her - something she had done so well to disregard and push down up to this point, but her resolve was weakening under his gaze.

He doesn’t respond, eyes never leaving her as they trail up and down her body, constantly returning back to her bare legs and thighs. And from the angle she stood, with the sunset behind her, her light colored linen shirt was nearly opaque and he could see the outline of her body. He feasted his eyes on her delicate curves, the way her hips jutted out and her waist dipped in above them, her toned arms flexing, muscles clenching. She was unquestionably sexy, and his craving for her had doubled if not tripled at the sight of her in this way, even after she pressed her dagger to his neck. Hells, even then.

She starts to back up as his gaze only intensifies - hungry eyes trailing her body felt like hot coals being dragged across her skin.

Before she can make it more than a couple inches away, his hands are grasping her waist, fingers digging into the soft flesh to a bruising point, pulling her back to him and flipping them so that her back is flush against the tree where his had been, effectively switching the roles and asserting his dominance over her, as he’d been dying to do for what felt like centuries.

His icy hand comes up to her throat, closing his fist around it firmly but not enough to entirely restrict her breathing and pinning her against the wood, his face now close enough to feel her hot breath against his cheeks.

The rough bark digs into her scalp and back, his fingers press into the spot just below her jaw near her pulse point. He feels her pulse thrumming rapidly against his fingertips, he can hear her heartbeat racing in her chest.

“You wound me, pet… I almost believed that one.” He purrs, his cold breath and the tone of his voice sending a chill down her spine, and an unwelcome heat through her, pooling low in her core.

With one hand still on her throat, his other hand rests on her waist before languidly roaming the parts of her body that weren’t covered by his own pressed against it.

She feels helpless under his touch, all of her previously built up walls and her icy facade start to melt beneath him, but not without her brain chiming in and reminding her who he is and how bad of an idea this was.

“Let me go.” She whispers plainly, unable to muster enough nerve to yell or scream or fight back, settling for no emotion at all.

He smirks at her, his hand advancing upwards, his fingers laving over the side of her breast, causing her nipples to harden, peaking against the soft linen fabric of her shirt.

“Is that what you really want, darling? Your body tells a different story,” he hums, his finger now grazing her nipple agonizingly gently, disrupting any thought or intention of fighting him off.

She's unable to find a word that could suffice in telling him to stop, but also dear gods please keep going. Her body was taking the reins, and she blames it on having not had any sort of intimacy since long before the nautiloid. Only to avoid the prospect that she was truly enjoying this.

Her silence doesn’t suffice, though.

He tightens his grip on her throat, pressing his index finger and thumb on either side of her jaw to direct her face so their eyes meet.

“I need you to tell me what you want, pet. I can’t do anything for you if you don’t tell me what you want.”

She bites down on her bottom lip almost hard enough to bite through, a slight metallic taste hitting her tongue. Her body was trembling with the effort it took to contain herself, to not give in to him but it was proving to be an insurmountable task. The logical side of her brain wants to say no just so he doesn’t get the satisfaction of her begging for him like he wants, but she can’t. The part of her brain that is apparently driven by the spot between her legs and the rest of her body is screaming over any logic and telling her everything she doesn’t want to hear.

“Harder.” She barely manages to choke out, her voice strained against the pressure of his hand on her throat.

He freezes, his body stilling and tensing up.

“What was that, darling? I couldn’t quite hear you.” He grits his teeth, his voice low and his mouth centimeters from her ear.

“Harder.” She says louder, placing her hand over his and pressing down.

Gods, he could’ve come undone right then and there.

Without another word, their lips collided in a frenzied and feral kiss, one that was inevitable, they both learned, judging by how effortless the kiss was - their lips melding and their tongues in sync as if they’d done it a million times before. Her fingers ran through his ivory curls, tugging at the roots and eliciting a groan from him that sent a chill up her spine.

He obliged her request, slightly closing his fist tighter around her neck, which chokes a moan out of her that he quickly swallows in another kiss. His free hand greedily continues to roam and grab at anything he can - her thighs, her ass, her breasts, her hips. He can't get enough of her, he swears even being inside her wouldn't satiate his desire for her. He wants to mark her, he wants to claim her, he wants her to be his, even if it was only for this purpose alone.

She hooks her leg around his, pulling him flush against her and feeling his hardened cock straining against his breeches as it presses to her lower stomach.

She almost gasps, disappointed but secretly pleased to discover that he was big, from what she could tell through his clothes at least.

She had hoped she could at least say he was small or that the sex sucked after it was all said and done, but she had an inkling that this was just yet another thing she would have to begrudgingly give him his due credit for.

He notices her reaction to the bulge in his pants, and smirks as he presses a wet kiss to her jaw, then rocks his hips forward to press himself against her even harder.

"This is your doing, you know," He breathes, a smirk evident in his voice.

Annoyed by his arrogant words and gesture, she digs her nails into his shoulder, a noise that's somewhere between a moan and a frustrated growl escaping her as he continues to suck on her neck, grazing the skin with his fangs.

“I’m starting to think you like having your life threatened a little too much.” She breathes.

He chuckles, lips still hovering over hers. “Only by you, darling.”

He palms at her ass cheek roughly, surely leaving a slew of intentional bruises so that she has a reminder the next morning, then smacking it - his frigid touch adding to the sting of the rough contact.

She yelps slightly, biting her lip in an attempt to stifle any noises she may make. He shakes his head, releasing her neck and bringing his hand up to trace her lips with his fingertips.

"No, no, sweetness, I want to hear that pretty voice of yours. For now, at least." He has a look as if he was planning something that instantly set her on edge - she never knew what to expect from him, especially not in this sort of circumstance.

"You're such an ass," She grunts indignantly, before he dips a finger in between her parted lips.

Almost as if on pure instinct, she sucks on his digit, swirling her tongue and laving it in her spit. His breath hitches as he stifles a pleased groan. She smirks pridefully, his finger still in her mouth.

"And yet, here we are, darling."

In rebuttal, she bites down on his finger just enough to hurt him, which causes him to hiss in pain. He shoots her a warning glance, then relaxes when he sees the amusement on her face.

“So feisty.”

He rubs her bottom lip with a second finger, a silent plea to add another into her mouth, which she promptly obliges.

She gives the second finger the same treatment as the first, her mind running wild with images of his cock in place of his fingers, how he might taste, the way it already weeps with arousal for her - it felt so wrong, yet she couldn't seem to get enough.

He pulls his fingers out of her mouth with a pop, his crimson eyes holding hers in an intense stare as he brings his still dry hand down to hook her underwear to the side, the cool breeze hitting her drenched cunt and making her suck in a breath. He makes a show of bringing the two fingers that had just been in her mouth down to rub her soaking folds, making sure that she was watching his every move.

"Fuck, you're already so wet for me." He moans, his voice low and gravelly as he slowly begins to spread her apart, the filthy sounds of her arousal like a song to his ears.

A loud moan rips through her as she throws her head back, the slightest touch embarrassingly already almost too much. Maybe it was the anticipation, maybe it was because it'd been so long since she'd been touched like this - or maybe it was just another testament to how badly she needed him. His touch.

"Rather sensitive, aren't we, pet?" He teases, dipping his head down to place a kiss to the part of her chest that was exposed by the low neckline of her shirt.

"Shut. Up." She growls, her hand gripping the nape of his neck and pulling him closer. The rumbling of his laughter echoes in her chest as his mouth stays pressed against it.

He presses wet kisses further and further down as he slowly moves his face lower, sinking to his knees in front of her.

She can't contain the gasp that escapes her as she peers down at him - his typically pristine and well groomed silvery white curls were a disaster as a result of her hands ravaging them, his eyes were dark and lidded, his chest rising and falling rapidly. Not to mention, the satisfaction that came from him being on his knees below her, knowing what he intended to do - gods below, it was almost too much to bear.

He raises her shirt higher, holding it up between her breasts and getting just a small peek of the underside of them - the temptation to rip the wretched thing off of her and completely bare her to him crossing his mind. He decides against it, unsure if she'd want to be fully exposed in case someone decided to come check on her.

He, personally, wouldn't mind any of the others finding them this way - that way they would know that he was staking his claim on her. He was well aware that he was far from the only one in the camp that had dreamt of touching her, and he planned on being the only one who gets to.

He straightens himself up so he can trail another line of wet kisses down her abdomen, stopping just above the waistband of her underwear. His eyes flick back up to hers, finding that she had been watching his every move - satisfied with how quickly she catches on to his desires, as if it were natural to her.

He hooks two fingers beneath the fabric on each of her hips, waiting for her to protest. She doesn't, instead she reaches her hand down and attempts to pull them down herself. He grabs her wrist, stopping her.

"Ah ah, allow me." He commands, his voice equal parts soothing and threatening. She drops her hand back to her side. "Good girl."

He rips the fabric down her legs, letting it pool at her ankles before he hooks an arm under her thigh and lifts it so that she steps out of them. He pushes them aside, keeping her leg lifted as he pushes her night shirt out of the way once again, revealing her drenched and throbbing cunt to him, at long last.

He practically salivates at the sight, his eyes burning trails all around it as he drinks in every inch of her newly exposed flesh. This causes her to blush for the first time during this encounter, suddenly feeling self conscious about her most intimate area. She feels the urge to cover herself, her leg instinctively moving to clench against the other. He stops her quickly, pressing her leg up even higher, stretching her already sore thigh muscles.

"Absolutely perfect. To think you’ve been keeping this all to yourself." He coos, his voice now softer, reverent, even. As if he were quietly admiring the finely crafted sculpture of a goddess on display in the foyer of a tabernacle.

With her leg now draped over his shoulder, he continues his attack of wet and hungry kisses up her leg. He toys with the knife strapped to her, running a finger along the hilt of the blade, then biting the leather strap on the innermost part of her leg, his lips brushing against the skin and causing goosebumps to prickle up.

He slowly continues trailing up to the apex of her thighs, pausing at the very top of her thigh and nipping at the plush skin.

Her arousal and frustration had started to truly boil within her, him taking his damn sweet time was beginning to piss her off all over again and she knew he was doing it deliberately. He was trying all that he could to get her to beg.

"Astarion, if you don't eat me out right now, I'm going to kill you."

She wouldn't beg, no. Threatening, though? Easy.

"Patience, darling. Good things come to those who wait."

She scoffs. "I'm starting to think you're stalling. Scared that you won't be able to live up to your reputation?" She taunts in an attempt to anger him enough to finally oblige her.

His eyes narrow, his once smug face falling into a scowl.

He quickly unsheathes the knife on her thigh, grabbing it by the blade. Her eyes widened.

"What the hells are you doing?" Her voice held a bit of unease as she watched him gently tap the tip of the blade, as if he were testing the sharpness.

He grins wickedly, his eyes flicking from the dagger back up to hers. "I'm going to shut you up. Open," he commands, bringing the hilt of the dagger up to her lips.

She shoots him an uncertain look, confused. He sighs, frustrated, then presses the hilt further until her lips parted, and she took it between her teeth.

The sun had finally dipped below the horizon, the golden light shifting to a cool blue glow, the reflection of the moon glinting off of the recently sharpened and polished blade. She hadn’t realized just how sharp Lae’zel made it, and having it so close to her face this way truthfully made her nervous.

A twisted part of her enjoyed it for that fact.

He looks up at her, the sight of the hilt of the dagger that she'd threatened him with only minutes prior, now held between her teeth both ironic and unequivocally erotic.

"Much better. Shall we try this again?"

Satisfied with the outcome of his bright idea and the muffled groan of frustration from the only one who’d been plaguing his thoughts when he was alone in his tent, he returns to his prior ministrations, starting his trail of kisses right back where he'd begun them just at the side of her knee.

He repeats the process identically to how he'd done it previously, except this time he bites the top of her thigh slightly harder, eliciting a whimper from her, nearly causing the knife to slip out of her mouth.

"Careful, pet." He warns, a slight smirk playing on the corners of his lips.

With his face still right at the crest of her thigh, cool breath fanning across her burning hot flesh, he brings his even colder fingers back up to tease her folds. She jolts at the sensation, involuntarily crawling upward onto the tree, now on tiptoe with her leg that's still on the ground. He tightens his arm around her thigh, pulling it down on to his shoulder slightly as if to warn her to stay still. She obliges, flattening her foot back down and relaxing her posture as best as she can manage, the thought of making this take even longer agonizing.

His deft fingers work her slowly, touching everywhere but where she needed him most. The sounds of her slick arousal seemed much louder now that they’d both gone mostly quiet apart from their heavy breathing, and she feels that damned blush creep back up to her cheeks once again. 

She involuntarily yelps when his fingers tease her entrance, her walls instinctively clenching around nothing. She disobeys him by wriggling slightly, then realizes and quickly tries to cease her movements. He lets his thumb rest against her swollen and throbbing clit, refusing to move even an inch until she settles down.

“Look at you,” he coos. “So eager for me. I almost want to take that dagger out of your mouth and hear that sweet voice moan for me again.”

She bites down even harder into the hilt of the dagger to stifle the moan that threatens to escape her throat, certainly leaving teeth marks that she’ll have to hide in case anyone needs to borrow it later.

He chuckles, his eyes still trained on her face as he pushes ever so slightly against her entrance, his thumb pressing harder into the over-sensitive bud - savoring her every reaction to him. The way her brows knitted up, the way her glossy eyes widened, her hands clutching the fabric of her shirt and holding it close to her chest, the way the dagger shifted slightly in her mouth as her jaw clenched around it. She was a feast for his eyes and he intended to savor every bite. 

Finally, he decides to show her mercy and push his fingers further in, careful to move slowly and give her time to adjust. Her eyes blow wide and her head falls back against the tree, giving him a full view of her neck that makes his mouth water. 

Next time, he thinks to himself.

His fingers are just barely not too thick for her - the stretching only slightly uncomfortable and otherwise euphoric. He pumps in and out at a lazy pace at first, quickening over time as he feels her fully adjust after a while. She’s perfectly tight, her velvet walls clenching his fingers with every plunge into her depths. He can barely think straight, all rational thought having left him ages ago. All that he can think now is how badly he wishes it were his cock in her rather than his fingers - but as he’d told her, good things come to those who wait. 

She feels herself creeping ever closer to her peak as his movements become more and more rhythmic and deliberate, his thumb rubbing circles around her clit as his fingers piston in and out, hitting all of the right spots and driving her wild. Her body is buzzing, her legs trembling. She wants to resist how incredible this all feels, but gods, does it feel incredible. 

Everything that comes after this is a problem for later, right now, all she wants is to—

“Aah!” She yelps as he curls his fingers, the dagger slipping from her mouth and thankfully dropping to the ground beside them. 

He grins, continuing his ministrations. “Are you gonna come, pet?” 

She takes her bottom lip in between her teeth, scared to say yes in fear that he may stop and deprive her of her release just to spite her.

“Answer me.” He commands, his voice coming out as a low growl. 

She reluctantly nods.

“Use your words. Answer me.”

“Y-yes. Gods, yes. Just… don’t stop.” She whines, trying her damnedest for it not to come out as a beg, but rather a command. It was mildly successful.

To her surprise, he speeds up the pace, pumping in and out of her hard and fast - the way she so desperately craved it. She feels herself right at the edge, her orgasm impending - he can tell, as she writhes and whimpers over him. Just as he can tell she’s about to hit the peak, he stops. 

She keens at the sudden loss of friction and movement, her walls clenching down around his fingers even harder, her cunt throbbing and dripping onto his hand. 

“Why…” Is all she manages to say, her breathing ragged and her chest heaving.

“I want you to come on my mouth.” 

That alone could have sent her over the edge. 

She nods fervently, her hips bucking forward toward his face. 

He considers punishing her for being too hasty and too eager, but he couldn’t care less any more to keep up the game - he needs to taste her. He needs to devour her. 

He moves his thumb, making way for his tongue to replace it. He expertly strokes his tongue across her folds, her essence sweet and tangy on his taste buds. He swipes across her clit, causing her to jerk into his mouth, a string of incoherent curses leaving her lips. 

She drops the fabric of her shirt and threads her fingers through his hair once again, gripping it almost painfully. He groans against her, the vibrations of his voice against her causing her to see stars. 

He lifts her shirt out of his way once again, mouth never breaking from her, and growls in frustration at the piece of fabric that kept dropping into his face. Taking his growl as a silent command, she rips the fabric over her head and tosses it aside, now completely naked and bare to him as well as the cool night air.

His eyes widened at the sight of her, finally getting a full view of her breasts and the rest of her that was previously unrevealed to him. He breaks away from her cunt for a moment, both hands moving to palm her full breasts. 

“You are exquisite.” 

She’d almost prefer if he’d insult her, be cruel to her, say the worst things he can think of - that way she wouldn’t have to grapple with these new feelings that are bubbling up to the surface at how generous of a lover he’s proven to be, when only minutes prior she was sure that they shared a mutual hatred for each other. Maybe he was just putting on a show for her, like he always did. 

Yes. He’s putting on a show. He has to be, she thinks. 

She hisses through her teeth when he finally brings his mouth and hand back to her mound, wasting no time in resuming his prior crusade to make her come, pumping his fingers at a punishing pace, his tongue circling her clit in tandem. He keeps his free hand on her breast, pinching her nipple hard, causing her to roll her hips into his face. 

“That’s it, love. Take what you need.” 

For fucks sake, he’s going to be the death of me. 

His words, his mouth, and his dexterous fingers are a wicked combination - every single movement, every single word, every lap at her needy cunt is nearly too much for her to bear as she uses every bit of her remaining strength to keep from crumbling into a heap in the dirt. 

As requested by him, she continues to rock her hips forward, grinding down onto his fingers and mouth, his fingers hitting all the right places to drive her over the edge. She grips at his shoulder, nails digging into the fabric of his ruffled evening shirt, chest heaving as she creeps ever closer once again, and silently prays he has mercy on her this time. 

“Astarion, I’m—“

“I know, love. Come for me,” he says, muffled with his mouth still tongue deep in her. 

As if on command, she shatters, tumbling over the edge into free fall towards the hardest orgasm she’s had in months, perhaps even years. 

Her body shakes and writhes as she gushes on his tongue, but he doesn’t slow his movements, still pumping into her as she rides out her orgasm, pangs of unbridled pleasure crashing over her like tidal waves.

Her legs quiver, the leg that she was using to stand begins to buckle at the knee as all strength she’d had left from the day has finally been sapped from her body. She slowly slides down the tree into his lap, eyes closed and still reeling. 

She manages to weakly tilt her head forward, looking him in the eye for the first time with new eyes - unsure what that meant for her yet. She was half sure that she still hated him. Half. 

He grins at her, his own chest still heaving as he catches his breath, ruby irises lighter than before, a look in his eyes that she doesn’t quite recognize. 

“I’d be lying if I said I haven’t been dying to do that since the day I met you.” He says, popping his fingers into his mouth and licking her slick off. 

She swallows hard at the sight, her still sore and sensitive core starting to flutter again as he licks his fingers clean. 

“I still don’t like you, you know. You’ll have to do more than make me orgasm to change my mind.” She says, her tone unusually calm and amicable toward him despite her words. 

“Oh darling, who said we had to like each other to do that? In fact, I think it makes it all the more thrilling.” He brings his hand up to her cheek, gently caressing it and swiping his thumb across it. 

She puffs air out of her nose, a wry smile on her lips. “Who says we’re going to do that again?”

He grins, bringing his still wet lips and face closer to hers, his breath smelling strongly of a mixture of her essence, wine, and a bitter metallic smell that was undeniably blood - she assumes he hunted not too long before he joined her in the woods. 

“You can hate me all you want, my sweet, but I know that nobody has ever made you feel the way that I do. It’ll only be a matter of time before you’re crawling back into my bedroll, begging for another taste.” He taunts, his voice in that same low and sultry tone he did so well, the one that he knew had the power to melt anybody right into his hands. 

She narrows her eyes for a brief moment - then an idea flits into the back of her mind, a mischievous smile following suit. The game was now set, and she was ready to play. 

“We’ll see who begs who first, darling.” 

part two - ♡︎

[breachverse]

Breach: Chicago War Zone - WIP Update 18 - 26th of August 2023

... This one's actually been brewing for 6 months, so... 1 Million Words folks!

Update 21 has been released! Last public upload was pretty much a year ago so, I'm very sorry for the long silence, a lot of the updates have been mostly in the private testing phase on Patreon, but I am here with a bunch of fixes and hangout updates.

But most importantly... We've passed the 1 Million Words mark... My fingers are tired. ❤

You may play it on the link below.

Breach: Chicago War Zone (Updated)

DEVELOPMENT LOG#21 (15-April-2024)

(B2.1.1.24.4.15)

Alpha - 21

Fixed something here, fixed something there, fixed something everywhere

SideModule: Fixed Justin's hangout background

SideModule: Fixed Hayne's hangout background

SideModule: Added Anna's 1st hangout

SideModule: Added Charlie's 1st hangout

SideModule: Added Kaz's 1st hangout

SideModule: Added Carly's 1st hangout

Stats_Page: Added Archangel crew background notes

UniModule: Added 7 new weapons to the shop

MISC: Added AA-12

MISC: Added FAMAS G2

MISC: Added HK G36C

MISC: Added SIG MPX

MISC: Added PP-19 Vityaz

MISC: Added Ultimax 100

MISC: Added SR-25

COMPLETED: Chapter 3 Part 1 of The ARC branch (100%) (PT only) W.I.P.: AA Hangout Part 1 (86%) W.I.P.: AA Store system (85%) W.I.P.: FBI Hangout Part 1 (46%) W.I.P.: FBI Store system (65%) W.I.P.: Stat screen upgrade (40%) Word Count: 1,007,622 words including codes (Last update was 971,142)

I'll be completely honest, when I started Breach 2 I knew it was going to surpass 1 million words. I just didn't think it would take this long. Through numerous challenges, both in writing and in real life. Through numerous ups and downs, I'm absolutely surprised and grateful to know that there are people out there who still support me. I've had many thoughts, numerous times, to give up and move on to other things in life, but I didn't want to disappoint, so I kept writing.

I bring to you, the 1 million milestone update. It's really not much, but it is one step closer to completion. This update has been in the works for the past 6 months mostly due to the weapons rework and also story changes for the crew members that I apparently couldn't keep track of without a giant excel spreadsheet. This update finalizes the Archangel's Gamma Crew hangouts, which is Kaz and Carly's hangout as well as Anna and Charlie's hangout.

As before, they share the same storyline so they will both share the same hangout. If you choose to go out with one, you cannot go out with the other. Kaz shares it with Carly, and Anna shares it with Charlie. Keep that in mind. Oh, and there's 7 new guns to play with. Have fun, Ian.

This update does not include the new Chapters. Chapter 3 will still be Patreon exclusive until Breach 2 finishes and I can send the demo to the public testing, and to CoG for the full release.

I really cannot reiterate how grateful I am to have an amazing array of readers and supporters who are still here after numerous hiccups and fuck ups. Thank you all, so very much.

Much, much love. - Max ❤

Link to the CoG Forums

I also have a Discord server!

As always feel free to drop however many screenshot feedbacks you'd like, either in the forums or in our Discord channel!

[nepherit]

Justice for Raphael

I'm very new to Tumblr, I created an account here a few months ago after I discovered all the amazing Bg3-related art content that this place has to offer. Since then, I've never posted a single thing and barely left any comments, I'm not a very social person...but today I was scrolling my favorite bg3-related feed, when I stumbled upon a post of someone who received a rather rude ask from an anon whose sole purpose was to mock their works and insult their (possibly) favorite character Raphael, who was referred to by that anon as a "100% canon two pump chump bottom cringe clown". 

It is saddening to get yet another confirmation that some people out there aren't capable of respecting others' likes, not even in a fictional/virtual environment...but I guess that's to be expected. Besides the obvious, what made me decide to write this wall of text as my very first post is that Raphael happens to be my favorite too, the one and only fictional character I've ever felt invested in, and probably the reason why Bg3 will leave a life-long lasting impression on me.

So here I am, trying my best to point out some facts that (apparently) are easy to go amiss for some people out here:   First of all, there's nothing canon regarding what Haarlep says of Raphael, as a character's opinion about another isn't a fact to begin with. Especially if said character is (proved by facts) very unreliable as a source: him being an incubus whose standards are undoubtedly different from any mortals' and the fact that he hates Raphael are but the most obvious. Not to mention that "Speak with the dead" isn't 100% reliable either by D&D 5e rules ("the corpse is under no compulsion to offer a truthful answer if you are hostile to it or it recognizes you as an enemy"). Besides that, even if everything Haarlep says is to be considered true, the mocking words the players can say to Raphael before the fight are NOT, as Haarlep never gives such info to the player (he only responds with a "no" if asked about the matter). That line we can say before the fight is but the player's guess/ childish mockery, certainly it's not a fact.

From a purely objective perspective, the only info Haarlep gives to the player that isn't merely his opinion is Raphael's obvious selfishness and narcissism (the HoH is covered with images of him) and the fact that he likely only sleeps with himself (he has his incubus wearing his shape, even his name). By no means does that make Raphael a "cringe clown", nor would it even in the case where Haarlep spoke entirely the truth. Honestly, it never ceases to baffle me how some people can be so shortsighted and shallow. But perhaps those people are yet to grow up and come to learn that there can be much hidden beneath someone's (fictional or not) behavior. There's nothing to mock about the "Raphael only wants to sleep with himself and only loves himself" statement. 

How could it be otherwise? How, when the only person who ever loved Raphael, the only one he could trust and rely on since his birth, was himself? How could he crave someone's affection and so, be seen as weak? How could he care for another or their feelings when he never got that care or respect, to begin with? Despite his theatrics and his facade, Raphael was born Cambion, a half-breed never to be considered more than the lesser of the devils in the hierarchy of the Hells. Cambions cannot rank up, no matter their blood ties, yet Raphael managed to achieve all that he has...his palace, his many souls, and his power. None of that was gifted to him, he fought hard and earned every last bit of it with his claws, his wits, and his determination. I admire Raphael for that, for striving to become something greater than what he was supposed to be...something better than his father's "half-devil" son.

To reduce Raphael, who's most certainly one of the deepest and most complex characters we can encounter in the game, to a "100% canon two pump chump bottom cringe clown" is beyond low, very immature, and a rather shallow view, more so if it comes from someone who hasn't even had the guts to show their name...

Well, that's all. I doubt someone will make it this far, as I wrote a veeeeery long paragraph. But for once, I wanted to have my say ^^

[therealcocoshady]

Recovery - Chapter 1

Eminem x Reader (Y/N) fanfiction

Summary : Y/N is getting sober and trying to rebuild her life after a hard breakup when she meets Marshall Mathers.

Tags : mention of SA ; Miscarriage ; Addiction

Author’s note : this is my first shot a my writing a fanfiction. Hope you enjoy it x

Chapter 1

- Thank you for having me, you said to Talia.

- No problem, baby. You stay as long as you need to, she answered while giving me a hug.

You looked around, taking everything in. In a matter of days, you had lost nearly everything. It all started when you woke up in the hospital, several tubes attached to your body.

FLASHBACK

Apparently, you had been in a coma for three days. Simon, your boyfriend of two years was sitting in a chair next to your bed.

- I can’t believe you did it again, Y/N.

- It’s not what you think, Simon.

- It is exactly what I think. You need help. You need to get yourself together. Next time you might not be so lucky. You might actually die, he said.

Dying. To be fair you hadn’t really tried to kill yourself. It was more complicated than that and Simon knew it.

- I’m sorry, you said, trying to hold his hand.

- No, he simply answered, taking his hand off yours.

He looked at you with a piercing gaze, not saying a word for what felt like forever. He didn’t need to, anyway. You already knew it was over.

- I love you, Y/N. I really do. But I can’t go on like this. You need to seek treatment, he said with tears in his eyes.

- I just wanted to sleep, you know, you tried to explain.

- By taking over 100 pills of Xanax ?! Are you fucking kidding me ? He asked, fire coming from his eyes.

- I…

Tears started rolling on your cheeks. As much as you knew you had done something terribly stupid, you wished he wouldn’t break up with you. You wished he would understand.

- Simon, don’t do this, you pleaded.

- I’m sorry, he simply said, getting up and grabbing his jacket. You have a problem and I cannot deal with it.

He walked towards the door and faced you for the last time.

- Your stuff will be packed when you get out of here.

And there it was. Shortly after moving in with your boyfriend, you were homeless.

END OF FLASHBACK

- Are you ok, Y/N ? Talia asked.

- Yeah. Sorry. I just… I can’t believe it’s over, you said. I really screwed up.

She gave you a big hug again.

- What’s done is done. Now you need to focus on getting better, she said.

- Thank you for being here for me. And allowing me to move in with you. And not judging me.

- What you need now is not judgement. It’s support. I am a bit mad though, she explained. I wish you had come clean to me about all those prescription pills.

- I thought I could manage, you tried to explain.

- Well you thought wrong.

Your best friend was being hard on you, and she had every right to be. For months, you had been lying through your teeth to everyone in your life. You had pretended that you were this happy-go-lucky girl who had it together. On the outside, you had everything : you were successful in your PhD research at university of Michigan, a loving boyfriend you had just moved in with and a tight-knit circle of friends who loved you unconditionally. But deep down, you had been unable to handle the pressure of your studies and, the hardest thing of all, you had lost your baby, going through a miscarriage at 13 weeks of pregnancy.

- You should rest before I take you to your meeting, Talia said. And then, we’ll go to the studio. Jamal invited us.

- Do we have to ? I think I’d rather come back here right after the meeting, you pleaded.

- Meeting new people will be good for you, she said. And I won’t lie : I don’t think you should be alone in here.

She was making it clear that she didn’t trust you. After all, how could you possibly prove that you weren’t going to be popping pills as soon as you were alone ?

- Right, you said.

She left you to your new room. Thank God she and Jamal, her boyfriend, were living in a big house with plenty of room to spare.

Jamal was a beat maker and producer and had made quite a name for himself. He was now starting to work with famous people. One of them was Eminem. You weren’t a big fan, although you did enjoy some of his most well-known music. In fact, this man was to be credited for you learning how to swear in English, as you’d learned the language by watching movies and listening to music. You hadn’t listened to him in a long time though and you were kind of wondering what he was up to, now.

Talia sometimes went to the studio with Jamal and she was getting along with everyone. According to her, “Em” (as she called him) was a great guy and she was pretty sure the two of you would get along.

FAST FORWARD

You had officially made it through your first NA meeting. It had been emotional but you were glad you went. Now was the time you dreaded : meeting everyone at the studio. As much as you appreciated Talia’s efforts to help you clear your head, you weren’t exactly the social type.

As the two of you entered the studio, you were greeted by half a dozen people. As soon as he saw you, Jamal got up and have you the biggest hug.

- How did it go ? He asked.

- Uh… it went well, I guess, you answered.

You weren’t particularly intent on talking about it, especially in front of people. Fortunately, Jamal was wise enough not to elaborate. The two of you were close and he knew better than to embarrass you. Still, you were thankful for his concern. From the moment he learned you’d be moving in with them, he had been nothing but supportive. « I know you’ll get through it », he had said.

Talia introduced you to everyone.

- So, this is Y/N, our new roommate and my very best friend, she said.

- How come we never met you before ? Somebody asked.

- Well, Y/N is a scholar so she doesn’t have a lot of time for people with lesser minds, she said jokingly.

You blushed immediately. Your best friend was the most supportive person of your work and she never stopped telling you how proud she was.

- Nice to meet you all, you said a bit awkwardly.

You shook everyone’s hand and you kind of had a shock as you introduced yourself to Eminem. You remembered him from at least fifteen years ago, blonde hair and clean shaven. He was now sporting brown hair as well as a well-trimmed beard. You would never have recognised him, had the two of you crossed path in the street. You couldn’t help but think to yourself that he was rather good looking. And in pretty good shape for an older dude who was in his early fifties. In fact, he did look at least ten years younger.

- Call me Marshall, he said as soon as he shook your hand.

- Ok, Marshall, you said while looking in his deep blue eyes.

He wasn’t as cheerful and smiling as the others, but he wasn’t distant either. You had always pictured him as a loud person, but the man you had in front of you was far from it. In fact, he seemed like the quiet, rather serious type. He looked like he was staring at you as if he was trying to read into your soul.

You joined Talia and sat on one of the big leather couches while everyone got back to working. You looked around and noticed that the studio seemed like a very comfortable, soothing space. For the first time today, you eased a little.

After some time, the group decided to take a break. Most of them went outside to smoke a cigarette and get some air, but you stayed inside. You did indulge in the occasional cigarette but you had been told it would be easier for you to refrain from taking any substance. You tried to be reasonable and not get tempted by the smell.

At some point, you were left with only Marshall, who was listening to the tune they just recorded in his headphones, pushing buttons on the mixing desk.

- So, how long have you been sober ? He asked as he looked at you.

- How do… how do you know ? You asked in shock.

- I was with Talia and Jamal when they got the call about one of their friends behind in the hospital after an OD. And you playing with your NA chip kind of tipped me off, he shrugged.

- Oh. Right. Actually, today was my first meeting, you said and blushed a little.

- Recovery is hard, he pointed out. Congrats on taking the first step.

You didn’t say more and he got back to mixing, as you stayed silent and watched him being extremely focused. As you studied him, you couldn’t help but notice an AA necklace dangling from his neck.

- So you’re in recovery too ? You asked.

- Yeah. Been sober for fifteen years now, he said with a smile.

- Wow. That’s impressive.

- Doesn’t mean it’s always easy, though, he confessed. But it’s 100% worth it.

There were a hundreds of questions going through your mind, but you clearly did not know him enough to ask them. Instead, you just smiled.

- Want to give me your opinion on the track ? He offered with a smile while handing you the headphones.

- I know nothing about music but sure, why not, you said, taking place in the chair next to his.

You placed the headphones on your ears and he played the song. You closed your eyes, in order to concentrate on what you were hearing. You were amazed at how fast this man was able to rap. Yet, you could hear and understand every single word. You particularly enjoyed the rhyming schemes. And, as ever with Jamal, the music was on point.

- it’s good, you said. It’s really good.

- Good to hear, he said with a smile.

The others came back to the room and Talia seemed extatic at the sight of you and Marshall talking. She knew how shy you were and every time you talked to someone new, she saw it as some sort of victory.

- So, people, Jamal said. How about y’all come to our place after ?

Everyone cheered and agreed. From what you gathered, it was usual for the group to meet at Jamal and Talia’s after a long day at the studio, so that they could kick back and get their mind off work. Talia held your hand in hers.

- I forgot Jamal wanted to have people over, I’m so sorry she said.

- It’s fine, you reassured her. But I’d rather stay in my room, if you don’t mind.

As everyone was arriving at Talia and Jamal’s, you said your goodbyes decided to hide in your room. Not that everyone hadn’t been super nice, but you highly suspected that there would be alcohol involved, if not weed. While you were climbing up the stairs, Talia grabbed your arm.

- Are you going to be ok ? There won’t be any hard liquor or anything like that, Y/N. Just a few beers, she said.

- I know, but… it’s been a long day. Meetings, people… I’d rather rest, you reassured her.

- Sure, she said as she gave you a peck on the cheek. I’ll be downstairs if you need me.

As soon as you entered your room, you changed into some comfier clothes : a cream-colored, cashmere set. You removed your makeup and put your hair up in a bun. You weren’t going to see people anyway so why bother ? You decided to watch Friends (your favorite show on Earth) and snuggle under a throw that reminded you of the place you shared with Simon.

After a couple of episodes, you heard a unfamiliar knock.

- come in ? You said.

The door opened and you saw Marshall standing there.

- So, are you hiding ? He asked with a smile.

- Kind of, you admitted.

- You have nothing to be scared of, he said. It’s very chill, downstairs.

- There’s still booze, right ?

- Just beer.

- I don’t really trust myself, you admitted.

- You had a drinking problem too ? He asked.

- Nope. Just pills. But now that they’re gone, I swear I’d take anything just to feel remotely… whatever.

- I feel you, Marshall said.

- Do you ?

- Yes, he simply said, showing his AA necklace.

- How do you feel so comfortable in a setting like this then ? You asked, wondering if you would ever get to the same point.

- It’s been 15 years, he explained. It gets easier with time. Plus, I’ve come to value the person I’ve become much more than the person I used to be when I was using. No money in the world could convince me to come back to that.

- It’s hard, you know. Hiding here when I know what’s going on down there, I said.

- Talia already gave Jamal so much shit about it, he said with a laugh.

This made you smile. Deep down, you knew Jamal didn’t mean harm, so you were kind of hoping Talia wasn’t giving him too much of a hard time.

- Thank you, you whispered. I don’t want to deprive you of your own fun, though.

- It’s fine. I don’t think I’m gonna stick around for long. I wanted to see if you wanted to go for a drive. You know, change your mind …?

- Uh… sure, I replied. Give me 5 minutes so that I can get dressed ?

He left the room and you quickly put together an outfit with a pair of dark wash jeans, a black turtleneck, a pair of knee-high boots and a blazer. You put your hair in a sleek ponytail and added some mascara for good measure. You weren’y trying too hard, but I definitely wanted to make an effort. After all, you had just met him - and he was extremely attractive.

- Ready to go, you said as you emerged of my room.

- Some sweats would have been enough, you know, he said joking.

- Oh. I started blushing.

- You look great though.

He didn’t say a word more and you got downstairs.

- Y/N and I are going on a drive, Marshall announced.

- Wait a minute, Talia said before you got the chance to get through the door.

She looked at both of you.

- No messing around. No drinking. No smoking. Nothing illicit or illegal. And you’d better be back home before midnight.

- Yes, Marshall noted with a chuckle.

- Yes Mom, you said jokingly while giving her a peck on the cheek.

As you got ouf of the house, you got to an impressive car. You were never good at recognising the brands or models, but this one was huge and it seemed like it was really expensive. It was also a bit contrast with Marshall, who did not look like the over-the-top stereotypical rapper. In fact, he was wearing normal clothes - jeans and a hoodie, no luxury logo to be seen.

- Where are you taking me ? I asked.

- You’ll see, he said with a voice full of mystery.

Normally, you wouldn’t have agreed to a car ride with someone you barely knew, but you were so eager to leave the house that you did not really care.

You took place in the car and Marshall started driving.

[beabnormal24]

Last time I expressed my opinion on something I got sent death threats because apparently the fandom around F1 is more toxic than I thought (and you want for it to be a safe space for women? The irony!), but now I’m currently running on 30 minutes of sleep after an asthma crisis I had this night so I could care less! New challenge Carlos’ haters, let’s see what kind of nasty comments I will get sent!

I read that Fred went around and said that they sacrificed Charles’ race in Singapore last year to get Carlos’ win.

Even if that might be true to some extent, because unfortunately you always have to choose in similar situations and circumstances, Carlos still got pole position, he still led the race comfortably for every lap, and he still pulled off that insane strategy on the last lap.

THAT IS NOT TO BRING DOWN CHARLES, I have to write it in caps or else some people (cough cough) will start flooding my dms with very adorable and loving anonymous messages. It is simply to justify why the team would choose Carlos, because he was in a more probable position to get a win and Ferrari needed that win, Fred himself needed that win to show that he is a good team principal.

And I will say that, I actually do think that he’s a respectable leader, he knows how to do his job and he does think about the team’s interest for most of the part. Whether he is a bad person or not I actually cannot say since I follow the sport, not a reality show.

What I think is that he expressed himself terribly wrong by saying that they had to “”””sacrifice”””” Charles to get Carlos’ win.

I honestly think he only said that because he wanted to shrug off all the repetitive questions about “Do you regret firing Carlos? Do you regret getting Lewis? Do you regret and do you regret and blah blah blah”.

And I get that, but I just think that he could’ve chosen another way to say that, or just said something different entirely, mostly because the driver you are talking about is, in fact, the one you decided to fire and also the one that you know is looking for a good seat for next year, and you “kind of badmouthing” him isn’t the kindest thing to do in this situation.

I don’t think it will influence Carlos’ job seeking that much, since he does have his pockets full of consistent races and the Australian win and a 100% race-podium percentage and, anyway, Singapore speaks for itself, Fred’s words or not.

Just, Fred, dear Fred, think about your words twice next time, thanks.

[some-beans]

Hey! I saw your gyomei post, and wondered if you could do one with Tengen? I feel like his flamboyant energy would be so funny with the twst characters.

jabdjshshs absolutely !! sorry it took a while to come out, life is crazy and the horrors aren't helping

✎...pairing: twisted wonderland x tengen!reader ✎...themes: chaos, flamboyant reader, can be seen as platonic or romantic, ace slander [ affectionately ] ✎...notes: can you tell which characters are easier to write for, male implied reader !! ✎...enjoy !!

𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐒𝐋𝐀𝐁𝐘𝐔𝐋

𝐑𝐈𝐃𝐃𝐋𝐄

riddle cannot catch a break from these tall ass people

truly

sure, you don't squeeze the shit out of him like floyd does, but you're probably just as loud

actually, scratch that

you are

BUT

at least you know when to shut up ― except when someone insults you or your wives

which btw, wtf?? three whole wives??

god, you're gonna make riddle have a heart attack

𝐓𝐑𝐄𝐘

tbh he kinda vibed with you

especially when you constantly tasted complimented his baking abilities

doki doki goes trey's heart

but overall, i do feel like trey would sometimes get tired/exhausted from you being loud ― typically when deuce or ace annoy the shit out of you

was bluescreening when you casually mentioned you had three wives back home, who you deeply miss

mans needs a moment to sit down

𝐂𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐑

another person for him and his fans to simp for??

um yes pls !!

i feel like cater, alongside rook, would end up being your biggest fans

albeit platonic or homoerotic

you decided !!

but besides the simping, i feel like cater would 100% use you as a shield from riddle's or anyone else's wrath

mainly riddle tho

. . .

don't tell riddle that

i also feel like cater would love to just talk about your wives ― may have written some fanfics about you and your wives 👀👀

𝐀𝐂𝐄

oh ace

sweet stupid ace

he really tries to sneak up on you and fails every time, and then has the audacity to act surprised and call you a cheater

what part of you being a former ninja does ace not understand??

a lot apparently

also gets his ass folded a lot, yet he never learns his lesson

especially after finding out, you have three wives

mf is jealous as hell

goes all mopy and shit

𝐃𝐄𝐔𝐂𝐄

similar to epel, deuce idolises you but it's much more wholesome

he definitely goes to you whenever he needs help dealing with something

especially if doesn't want to ruin his model student imagine

the poor boy is lost whenever you talk rapidly

got his head spinning

definitely uses any chance he has to train with you

𝐒𝐀𝐕𝐀𝐍𝐀𝐂𝐋𝐀𝐖

𝐋𝐄𝐎𝐍𝐀

your loud and that's gonna fly with him

actively avoids you so he can nap in peace, but you always manage to find him

how??

he has no clue and he's starting to think you're somehow related to rook

grumbles when you wake him up for class

has hissed at you when you picked him up so causally, threw him over your shoulder like a sack of potatoes, and took him to class

he was pissed but also shookth

𝐑𝐔𝐆𝐆𝐈𝐄

he's on edge

why??

bc you always manage to catch pulling some sneaky shit

even with his unique magic !!

like how?!

quickly learns of your past and relationship status, and everything just clicks into place

you and your ninja ways, and stupid good hearing

. . . and stupid smirk and muscles

𝐉𝐀𝐂𝐊

did someone say, training partner??

cuz that's what you turn into

however, jack was nervous to ask to train with you at first, but steeled his nerves and asked ― which received a quick up-and-down look from you before agreeing to train with him

jack has never been more excited and embarrassed as he tried to calm his tail down

𝐎𝐂𝐓𝐀𝐕𝐈𝐍𝐄𝐋𝐋𝐄

𝐀𝐙𝐔𝐋

*sigh*

why did you have to be so muscular??

and good at detecting lies and shit

why couldn't you be another naive soul and sign his contracts??

azul is at a loss for words

however, he is thankful you can easily manage the twins and other students that give him grief

lowkey sees a halo around for that

𝐉𝐀𝐃𝐄

tbh i feel jade wouldn't bat an eye at you

for the most part

that was until you effortlessly hiked a mountain jade was on

great, now you have two eels on you

asks to go hiking with you whenever he's free

will talk your ear off about mushrooms on the hike

𝐅𝐋𝐎𝐘𝐃

a new jungle gym to climb??

*buzzer noise* wrong

has tried to squeeze but ended up getting squeezed instead

huh, so this is what it feels like??

n o i c e

bugs you every chance he gets for you to squeeze him

tad bit masochistic of you, floyd

𝐒𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐁𝐈𝐀

𝐊𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐌

kalim rinds of that kid with the demon sister back home with how goddamn cheery he is

will shower you with gifts, especially after seeing you wear jewellery and hearing about your wives

he doesn't really bat an eye at that

bby boi doesn't care as long as you're happy

loves giving hugs

just a very affectionate boi

you do allow him to hang off your arms when he's around

𝐉𝐀𝐌𝐈𝐋

sure you're loud, but you're responsible

meaning, he doesn't have to worry about you

however, does worry when kalim's involved

it's like a sixth sense

somehow when you manage to occupy kalim, jamil uses this time to get chores done or relax

truly is grateful for this opportunity

will make you food as payback

𝐏𝐎𝐌𝐄𝐅𝐈𝐎𝐑𝐄

𝐕𝐈𝐋

at first, he thought you were annoying and brash

i mean, you loud as hell and for what??

however

that changed when he saw just how flawless your skin was, the tidiness of your painted nails and the flawless eye makeup you wore

and that you strive for flamboyance??

vil can see the appeal

but quickly gets whiplash when you announce you actually have three ― very beautiful ― wives back in your world

what in the great seven??

𝐑𝐎𝐎𝐊

homie here is quaking in his cadavers

but from excitement

because great seven, does he enjoy trying to sneak up on you

does he succeed?? no

does he still try?? yes

most definitely has a mini shrine of you ― along with some other students

. . .

don't tell vil

writes endless amounts of poetry for, even after you tell him you've got three wives, which he just loves bc obliviously you have so much love to give

and di―

𝐄𝐏𝐄𝐋

pls for the love of great seven. . .

PLS TEACH HIM HOW TO FIGHT PLS

legit idolises you

it's a tad bit concerning but it feeds your ego and annoys vil

also

gremlin epel is always on whenever you're around ― even more so when he can let his accent slip when it's just the two of you

however, his world pauses when you mention in conversation that you have three wives

tbh he doesn't know how to feel bc he grew up in a somewhat traditional household

and you having three wives??

w a c k

𝐈𝐆𝐍𝐈𝐇𝐘𝐃𝐄

𝐈𝐃𝐈𝐀

nope

nah uh

no way pal

idia cannot deal with another loud extrovert

especially someone who's tall as hell, muscular and someone who sparkles whenever they say flamboyant

almost had a heart attack when you managed to sneak into his dorm room

and how in great seven are you fast and quiet for?!

oh

you're a former ninja?

. . .

ok maybe you can stick around

listen, he's watched countless anime and read, if not more, manga to know how fucking cool ninjas are

surprisingly isn't phased when you say you're married to three badass women

idia's watched his fair share of shit, so you only having three is not a big deal to him

𝐃𝐈𝐀𝐒𝐎𝐌𝐍𝐈𝐀

𝐌𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐄𝐔𝐒

your loud nature and openness surprised malleus greatly

happily listens to whatever nonsense you spout

is curious about how you have such incredible hearing, considering you're magicless and a human

finds your relationship status also intriguing

may or may not be jealous

finds your jewellery very pretty

*cue dragon hoard noises*

𝐋𝐈𝐋𝐈𝐀

you two definitely trade battle stories

may or may not have asked to join your marriage

what??

lilia may be a fae but that won't stop him

was not phased when you said you had three wives

that just made him even more intrigued by you

𝐒𝐈𝐋𝐕𝐄𝐑

may and may not have used you as a pillow by accident

he just gets sleepy

and you seem to somehow always know when he's about to fall asleep when you two are together

you tend to hang around him because his sound is the least annoying ― you told him this and silver just nodded

𝐒𝐄𝐁𝐄𝐊

look

y'all are both loud mfs

and 100% get into screaming matches

about what. . . probably something to do with malleus and your ego

he reminds you a lot of that boar kind back home

has tried to fight you

has lost every time

may or may not have gained respect from those fights

still salty tho

[shitpostingperidot]

Kamala Khan’s bookshelves

Kamala’s room in The Marvels is an absolute treasure trove of little details to zoom in on, and I’ve identified so many books on her shelves!

Shelf 1, top to bottom:

1. Landmark Experiments in Twentieth Century Physics by George L. Trigg

College-level book about experiments that helped us learn about x-rays, lasers, isotopes, superconductors, and all kinds of other things I don’t understand. Meant to be more practical than theoretical since it talks about the actual methodologies of these experiments. Could be for school, or for Kamala and Bruno to run their own tests of Kamala’s powers. The first of many books in the Khan house that come from Dover Publications.

2. Space Time Matter by Hermann Weyl

“An esoteric initiation into space time physics” -Amazon reviewer. I’m gonna be real, I don’t understand half the words in this book description, but apparently it’s famous for introducing gauge theory, which was later reborn as phase transformations in quantum theory. I can see this being something Kamala reads to try and understand the bangle transporting her to the Partition. Also from Dover.

3. A Map to the Sun by Sloane Leong

A graphic novel about a high school girl’s basketball team learning to work together despite their many differences and conflicts. Also it has a gorgeous color palette. Seems fairly self explanatory why it’s in this movie. I’ll definitely be borrowing this from my library! Like my friend Kamala recommended a book to me herself.

4. The Good Immigrant anthology edited by Nikesh Shukla

21 essays from Black, Asian, and Minority Ethnic (BAME) people in the UK about their experiences. It was crowdfunded initially, extremely critically acclaimed, and has gotten spinoffs and sequels. Riz Ahmed, who is British Pakistani, is one contributor, and a fun fact is that Rish Shah (Kamran from Ms. Marvel) worked with Riz Ahmed in an Oscar winning short called The Long Goodbye. Also, the editor, Nikesh Shukla, is currently writing the Spider-Man India comics series!

5. Bright Lines by Tanwi Nandini Islam

A coming-of-age story about 3 young adults with complicated family, friend, and romantic relationships between them. They have to travel from Brooklyn to Bangladesh together one summer and thereby discover a lot about themselves. I haven’t read it, but there seems to be a ton of complex representation of LGBTQ, POC, immigrant, and Muslim characters. I wonder how much the three main characters can be compared with our three characters with complex relationships in The Marvels, and I wonder which character Kamala most relates to!

6. I can’t tell! The font is bugging the hell out of me because theoretically, with that amount of contrast, I should be able to read a word when I get two inches from the TV and mess with the settings. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

7. I also can’t tell, but I’m being easier on myself because the title is written in white on a yellow background. It’s not the only book I know off the top of my head with this color scheme (Yellowface by RF Kuang) because the title is definitely multiple words. Help!

Shelf 2, right to left:

1. One Night that Changes Everything by Lauren Barnholdt

A YA romance where, through a convoluted series of events, a teenager must face all of her insecurities in one night. I can see Kamala devouring this as brain candy after wrestling with those advanced science books, or using it as fic inspiration!

2. Can’t tell, but love the color scheme!

This next one is a weird one, because I am 100% sure of what book it is, but I cannot find a picture of a matching edition.

3. Wizard at Large by Terry Brooks

It’s definitely, without a doubt, this book (where a character and a magical medallion are accidentally transported to Earth from another realm and switches places with an evil genie). Like those are the words on the spine and the plot of the book is an obvious choice for this movie. The fonts match on the audiobook, the ebook, and the next two books in the series. But try as I might, I cannot find any proof on the internet that the physical book that appears in Kamala’s room, that uses those two fonts and that spine formatting, exists. This is haunting me…

4. (On the other side of the box) It’s not The Twilight Saga Eclipse, but I definitely thought it was before I could watch in high definition. I think it’s a journal or sketchbook of Kamala’s; there are a bunch scattered throughout the room.

Shelf 3:

I’ve only identified the bottom book, which is Einstein’s Theory of Relativity by Max Born (Dover Publications). The third one up is HAUNTING me, it looks SO identifiable and yet!

Living Room Side Table:

1. Amateur Astronomer’s Handbook by JB Sidgwick (from Dover Publications)

2. Cosmology by Hermann Bondi (also Dover)

Both of these seem less difficult than the science books in Kamala’s room, but reviewers note that it helps to know calculus when reading Cosmology. Idk which member of the Khan family is reading these, but I love their family’s connection to the stars 💫

Tbh I’m having so much fun doing this! And I really wish we got to see Monica’s living space so I can analyze her books 😭

[amethystfairy1]

Hi I just read all of traveling thieves and it was so so good! Perfect mix of angst and comfort, it hurts so well :) I'm so excited to see where it goes next

I love how pearl and gem are vibing assassinating people together, they really are just girlbossing their way around

also gems sword is really cool

Gem getting bloodthirsty over the missing payment and then the guy offers pearl and she's like fine. I could use a companion I guess. But I will remember this. And then said companion helps her Kill and she's having fun and they're having a good time scandalizing people about an avian acting like a normal person but they can't do anything about bc that's The Slayer, you can't just FIGHT her about it she's got a broadsword dripping with enchants that she wields like it's nothing, and suddenly, oh, when was the last time gem had a friendship like this?

And tango and zed! Tango my beloved, poor guy he's doing his best, zed is also doing his best, and zed just running up to him and interviewing him excitedly and tango just being like 'uh. this is happening I guess' as their first meeting? Love it

Also zed flexing his master-smith seal to get them places and also just going 'i do what I want, YOU depend on ME' when he confronts heath about the water incident? 10/10

I'm also excited to see how Scott and Jimmy are doing, maybe he wants to be a free bird!!! I also love the narrative of Scott gets captured, he's in this new place and he immediately goes up to sit next to the only guy in the yard sitting alone, and he tries to escape and his new friend with the gold wings helps and then tries to tell him not to do that bc it'll just make it worse on him and Scott goes fine. I'll do it myself. and he DOES it and Jimmy goes well hell. Alright I'm going with him

And everything happening at the swagon? Oh my god?? Love me some misunderstanding hurt/comfort

Like at the beginning, grians still new to this whole situation with people being Nice to him, mumbo and scar are animatedly discussing a plan and grians in the corner just. Stressing. And now he's gotten more used to this and he's laughing (with bird noises!) and flying and quipping and committing petty revenge on mumbo lol and then something happens and he's Stressing again bc it's only been A Month

I was SO SURE I connected some dots bc of the 'between two books, right where he always left it' plus mumbo putting stuff back after grian hits the bookshelf plus how attached grian is to it (I am Looking at how he's described as treating it like glass Twice) that the going flying paper was going to go missing but apparently I have not connected the dots lol

I also love how grians tiny and then scar and mumbo are So Much Taller than him lol

In conclusion: I think I went a bit feral writing this but I really enjoyed the fic 👍 :)

Oh my goodness, thank you thank you!

I cannot tell you how happy receiving something like this makes me! All the details and thoughts! I love seeing someones thoughts about my AU like this for all the different groups going around! I'm glad the angst and comfort balance out for you, I know it's a dark fantasy AU but I also want it to have that sort of warm fuzzy edge to it, like everyone is being taken care of now, even if things were bad in the past.

Zed is 100% the BEST he knows what he is WORTH my boy look at him go I love him. Tiny tiny birb Grian! He's so sweet and traumatized poor lil guy 😭

Pearl and Gem are MENANCES they are TERRORS and I love them! Yes, yes, Pearl has had a bit more time to get more comfortable with Gem, and her experience navigating the system has also left her less shattered than Jimmy or Grian, for reasons that have been mentioned and will also later be explored in more detail.

Thank you so much for your wonderful words and for sharing them!!! 💖

[safyresky]

I am so ?????????

Finally watched the episode! UM. What in the fuck??? What?? The fuck??? Um???? I cannot really put into words the feeling I am having but I have a great emoji for it! 🤨🤨🤨

That's the vibe, lads.

So the Council. Ho boy. WOW. Allow me to just go OFF for a moment here :) :) :)

THEY CANNOT INTERFERE? THEY WILL NOT INTERFERE? HELLO?????

THE SAME COUNCIL THAT WAS SO KIND AND SUPPORTIVE TO SANTA DURING TSC2.

WITH THE TOOTH FAIRY WHO GAVE HIM A LIFT BACK NORTH.

MOTHER NATURE LITERALLY MARRYING SCOTT AND CAROL AT THE VERY LAST MOMENT.

OFFERING TO HELP SANTA MAKE UP THE DIFFERENCE WHEN THEY WERE BEHIND OR WHATEVER IN TSC2

THE COUNCIL THAT WAS LIKE "NO YOU CAN'T STOP BEING SANTA UR SO GOOD AT IT!"

THE SAME COUNCIL THAT CHARLIE WAS ABLE TO CALL UP ON CHRISTMAS EVEN FOR SOME EXTRA HELP? NO QUESTIONS ASKED>?

WOULD NOT HELP THE ELVES WITH MAD SANTA????

SO LA BEFANA, WHO WAS APPARENTLY ALSO A LEGENDARY FIGURE TOO (which is giving age old fanfics vibes lmao, not sure that's a good thing???? more at 10) HAD TO DO A ROBBERY? BECAUSE THEY WOULDN'T HELP?? BECAUSE THEY APPARENTLY CAN'T INTERFERE?????

WHEN THEY DO INTERFERE A LOT? SEE: THE ENTIRETY OF TSC3 WHERE THEY HAVE A MEETING BC OF SOME CARDBOARD STANDEES AND BAD WEATHER????? AND YOU ARE TELLING ME. THAT THEY WILL NOT INTERFERE WITH:

MAD SANTA ATTACKING THE POLE

EASTER BUNNY BEING TURNED INTO A BUNNY AND THEN A LEMON

EASTER BUNNY'S BASKET BEING STOLEN

EASTER BUNNY BEING KIDNAPPED

CRAZY AMOUNTS OF SANTA MAGIC ALL UNACCOUNTED FOR IN THE R E A L WORLD?????

SANDMAN MAGIC BEING USED ON SANDMAN?

BILLIONS OF SNOW GLOBES FILLED WITH CHRISTMAS MAGIC POPPING INTO THE REAL WORLD AND BEING GIFTED TO HUMANS?

THE WHOLE SIMON THING LAST SEASON?????

THEY WOULD NOT INTERFERE??? WHAT IN THE FUCK!!!!! It's funny, because like. When I was rage fic-ing post S1, I was thinking that the Council, given Scott being...SCOTT, had stopped talking to him as much bc tscs!Scott sucks so bad!! He 100% would've made comments that deffs did not sit well with ANY of the other Council Members, I mean, look at how he treated Cupid and Sandy! I'd hate to be on THAT Council during Covid, YIKES.

But like. GOD. @lmelodie you were SO RIGHT about Council stans being pissed bc I am MAD PISSED. ALSO, JUST LEARNT THAT I AM APPARENTLY A V BIG COUNCIL STAN!! (Checks out I suppose given my fic writing and reading habits, lol).

It's just so MADDENING and INFURIATING and SADDENING, IT'S ACTUALLY REALLY REALLY SAD TO SEE THAT T H I S IS HOW THEY'RE REACTING TO NOT BEING ABLE TO GET ALL THE COUNCIL MEMBERS BACK. Like, GOD, if you're unable to properly use them in the story JUST DON'T USE THEM AT ALL. I am once again REJOICING that the Millers have been left untouched, thank GOD for that!

AND ANOTHER THING (took a kitchen cleaning break and got all annoyed about loopholes). IF RESIGNING AS A LEGENDARY FIGURE ALLOWS YOUR POWERS TO WORK ON OTHERS, WHY WOULD THEY THREATEN JACK WITH THAT IN THE THIRD MOVIE? WOULDN'T YOU WANT HIM TO KEEP HIS TITLE SO THAT HIS POWERS WOULDN'T WORK ON THE REST OF YOU, INCLUDING SANTA?!?!?!?!?! THIS SHIT DOESN'T LINE UP! IT DOESN'T! LINE! UP! MY GOD! THIS SERIES IS MY VILLAIN ORIGIN STORY! THIS SERIES IS WHY PEOPLE NEED TO STOP REBOOTING OLD THINGS! 80% OF THE TIME IT'S A MISS! THAT'S TOO MUCH RISK! TOO MUCH!! AH!

I THINK I'M DONE YELLING ABOUT THE COUNCIL. PROBABLY NOT TBH. BUT FOR NOW I'LL CALL IT. GOD, I MEAN, I KNEW WHEN WE LEARNT WE'D BE SEEING SOME OF THEM THEY WOULD NOT MAKE IT OUT UNSCATHED BUT DAMN! DAMN! MORE RETCONNING LORE! DAMN!

eurhgjrbewhfnujqncwje nsdjk. GOD I'm EXHAUSTED. My brain itches. I was thinking of lobotomys today. I wonder why (/sarcasm)

(it was bc of a shitty patron at work but this just adds to the freudian slips)

UGH. Ick. Yuck. Moving on (impossible for me but we're gonna TRY!)

Elves vs Gnomes

So. The backstory thing. I just. It's cool lore but it leaves more questions than answers and just makes things SO CONFUSING. AS A DISCLAIMER: GO OFF BETTY, WE LOVE TO SEE HER BEING A BADASS. BETTY! HELL YEAH! WE HERE AT SAFYRESKY INDUSTRIES LOVE TO SEE BETTY THRIVING!

Now for the wank. From a LORE PERSPECTIVE. EURGH.

They drop that Mad Santa was a good Santa until he thought everyone was ungrateful and implemented coal and became buds with the gnomes, who apparently ran the coal mines. The gnomes get in his head and prey on his paranoia. Paranoia of WHAT. I've not done a second watch and I don't think I will because I don't actually want a lobotomy despite them being on my mind today a little too much tbh, so maybe i missed that bit, but like, come ON. We can do better in terms of giving antagonists a believable descent into villainy! GOD!

And the trap scene, that was so needlessly drawn out. They should have held him in the trap, Betty revealed her badass self, had Magnus taunt and THEN boom, Befana ALREADY THERE, and she nutcrackers his ass.

Also, calling it NOW. Not ONLY will Sandy un-nutcracker Cal, but she's deffs gonna re-nutcracker Magnus. I bet it'll be like a reversal spell or something lmao

BUT YEAH the lore for the elves around Mad Santa's reign is not quite hitting with me, I gotta say! I am not a fan of it and every time I see it (Betty and Noel aside bc they of course SHINE) it leaves me very :\. It just. Doesn't seem to hit? Or really work? It's just so convoluted to me and goes against everything they said NOT JUST in the movies but LAST SEASON AND ALSO IN INTERVIEWS ABOUT THE SERIES BEFORE TI CAME OUT! It's infuriating y'all. GOD. "A war we didn't see coming" wow, the gnomes and Pyros sure do have something in common, eh? 🤔🤔

Cal and Sandra

God, I love them. They're so funny. Cal is like destroying his room and Sandy is like BRO what the FUCK and HELPS HIM HUNT DOWN THE VEST WITH SANTA MAGIC!! USING HER BEFANA TRAINING! AND THEN HE HELPS HER MAKE UP WITH BEFANA! By lying, of course, so he can go be stupid and heroic and GET NUTCRACKER'D (they nutcrackered my boy ): BUT I LOVE THE WAY THEY SUPPORT EACH OTHER

And the almost hug that turned into punches, lol. That's so Toph coded. We love to see it!

We DON'T love to see Cal DOING THAT! THOUGH! I DID LOVE HIS SCENE WITH KRIS. I'm really hoping, given that he and Cal got duct tapped together and he knows Cal's been nutcrackered, that they give him more of a role, you know? Honestly, it'd be neat if they made Kris the next Santa! I think he'd fit the bill quite well! And then Cal could have his odd job montage and, you know, cross guard and sail on a cruise ship and such. I am VERY intrigued with this pairing, as an aside. Kris and Cal? There's potential. They're gonna fuck it up I'm sure, but we have some DANK POTENTIAL HERE

Sandra and Befana

I'M SO GLAD THEY CHATTED! I am still v much like Sandra did NOTHING wrong and Befana overacted, but I'm glad they talked. Interesting stuff about the magic taking a tole/consequences. Mad Santa really do be out here messing up the balance of things huh? And Mother Nature WON'T intervene. GOD. I know it's bc they probz couldn't get the rest of the ALIVE actors back but like. THEN WHY EVEN USE SOME OF THEM? YEESH. ANYWAY

I'm excited to see how Sandy and Befana manning home base goes! I'm glad they talked and hopefully they can un-lemon EB and just be general badasses around the Workshop, lol.

BUT YEAH. OVER ALL. ARGH. I AM ONCE AGAIN SEEING POTENTIAL, BUT KNOWING THAT IT WON'T BE REACHED IS ACTUALLY LIKE. DEVASTATING.

ALSO. I HATE THAT I WAS RIGHT ABOUT MAD SANTA GETTING TO THE POLE IN EPISODE 6. ARGH

[rhymingwithpurple]

I'm not familiar with Audrey from little shop of horrors (though I know the Queen herself). Do you think your tiff varies much from canon? What do you think of her character arc and stuff in the series? (also tiffanica yes)

I accidentally wrote too much so I'm putting a read more

I don't think my view really differs much from canon, but it does differ from the popular fanon interpretation, if that makes sense. I see a lot of complaints that she's not goth anymore, but I feel like people forget that she's really only "goth" in Bride -- after 10 years of mourning and intentionally trying to attract murderers. She's a little bit of a poser! That's okay! She very clearly dreams of domesticity at the same time. (Her little apron, her bathtub, the Martha Stewart worship). She's unable to replicate it partially because of who she is as a person but also because she's stuck in this relationship that's literally and figuratively killing her. Chucky does NOT want the same things she wants.

Tiffany also lives her life as performance, so I think it's hard to get to know the real her. This is super apparent when she's pretending to be Jennifer Tilly (what "tiffany" things did she sacrifice to keep up that act?) But in general, it's always there. (I think she has goth tendencies for real, I do. But I think she plays up aspects of herself depending on the situation.)

That gets into the series. I REALLY liked her arc in Season 1. I was surprised that people were mad at it. I thought the origin of them getting together was nice and fun, and I thought the chiffany breakup plot made sense. (People seem to forget that both Bride and Seed come to the ultimate conclusion that Tiffany is better off without Chucky and should leave him, but whatever.) Obviously I'm a tiffanica stan. Words cannot express the absolute joy at seeing this character who means so much to me express that she's bisexual like me. Oh, I cried.

Chucky is, frankly, abusive to her, and won't change. Nica, by contrast, shows her pity, which Tiffany interprets as love. (It's textbook harley/joker to harley/ivy)

I don't love the amputation, this is known. If you wanna talk about differing from canon, when I talk about tiffanica, I basically pretend it didn't happen. I have talked EXTENSIVELY with bestie kora about a tiffanica situation in which 1. the amputation doesn't happen and 2. nica gets un-possessed (due to some voodoo rules we made up) and the relationship progresses from there. Nica is kind of being held captive and kind of being protected. The blueprint is Beauty and the Beast. 100%. (If you see me talking about tiffanica with relation to "murder roadtrip" or "mr" -- it's that). I understand the reasoning behind it, but ultimately it was a flop moment with too heavy consequences and a poor writing choice.

Season 2, I didn't love in general, and I'm not really sure what to make of it, other than I liked the interactions with Glen and Glenda. I hope going forward into Season 3, she doesn't go crawling back to Chucky. (and I hope there's some homoerotic tiffanica tension. I can dream, okay?)

I could talk At Length about Tiffany in various eras of her life and I loooove to do it because I love her sooooo much. These asks are so fun to get :)

[callipraxia]

Things I Learned This Morning:

1) Using print instead of script, which would be faster but less tidy, I may hand-write not far under 1300 words per hour when things are going well. (The exact number was 1267 words)

2) My brain harbors an irrational hatred for the number 4 apparently? (I kept almost skipping it and having to go back and erase the little number above fourth words because I wrote 4 as 5, for instance, going straight from 223 to 225 before I caught myself.)

3) Taking a pencil and individually numbering every word you wrote takes a really long time.

4) Apparently my brain also cannot handle writing a series of numbers that consistently go above two digits. I transpose digits, forget the first digit, write 8 instead of 3, write 5 instead of 8, write 2 instead of 9….I made it through the first 1000 but counted the remainder in blocks of 1-100 in the interests of staying tolerably sane.

5) My print is indeed much more legible than my script, but also, oww, my elbow feels like it’s about to crack right now and my hand feels all twisted up inside, ow ow ow.

(Backstory: I’ve been stuck in a rut for a while, so I decided to say “what the heck” and try to force myself to write a rough draft of one of my fanfic ideas for NaNoWriMo. I’m printing because I am currently Resolved to write a complete rough draft and then revise it, all before posting anything. Then, in theory, I’ll post it by chapter on an actual *posting schedule*. However, since I have never managed to muster the kind of discipline needed to keep working on a project nobody has seen and praised some part of for that long in my entire life…we’ll see. Plus, it might be easy enough to make it to the word count minimum today, but I only just finished the setup phase of the first scene, getting Pacifica from “the alarm clock rang” and through “Pacifica reflects on what mornings in Northwest Manor were like compared to her new life” to the point of “Pacifica has gotten out of bed.” That kind of writing is super-easy for me, but the kinds where things actually happen can be…much slower going. Which means I’ll have to apply even *more* discipline to make quotas on some days. So basically I, a deeply scattered and undisciplined person, am basically attempting to overhaul my personality for at least a month, lol. Wish me luck, folks….

For my GF peeps, I hope that you’ll enjoy the results if this project does amount to anything, even though it is a bit of a departure from my ‘usual’ material. You see, I have a lifelong, deep-seated love for books set in schools/based around school years, and I have decided to combine that with my desire to write some post-canon material. We’re picking up very shortly after the finale, with the first day of school in Gravity Falls - the Pineses should have some involvement, here and there, but mostly via phone and Internet. I’m sufficiently addicted to the “greater scope” that I don’t think I‘ll end up with something that is purely YA or a “girls’ book,” but it will involve focusing on more girls and therefore “girl stuff” than canon/anything I have written previously - Pacifica, Wendy, and Candy are all projected to be narrators, with Grenda also at least being an important character and possibly a fourth narrator. Compare to FWJB, where the narrators consisted of ten dudes, Bill, and Mabel…and although I put him in his own category, Bill does seem to use he/him pronouns when interacting with English-speaking mortals, and so one could very reasonably argue that the narrators consisted of eleven dudes plus Mabel. Soos may well get some narrator time, but this one also seems on course to primarily focus on the kid characters. Gulp. We’ll see how it goes….)

[sleepy-achilles]

My last post has been stuck in my head and I NEED to read an au of these two motherfuckers.

Young and shy taker being hassled by champion fuck boy shawn, as he desperately tries to get his attention after seeing him at a bar 🥹

LIKE LOOK AT THE MATERIAL

Let's go (also 100% starting with shy taker and ending up with Mr steal yo bitch) I'm also under the impression that Shawn is in the wwf but taker isn't.. I might be wrong about that but that's what I've gone for in this, if I'm wrong honestly just say and I'll write you another one.

Also I cannot flirt to save my life so this will either be really cringe or make me want to die. In other words it's gonna be short because I can only flirt with my close friends and not a single other soul. I'm wired differently.

Hbtaker AU- Boy Toy Flusters

------------------------------------------------------------------

Taker taps his fingers against the bar. He tended to stay home and drink but Paul was not leaving him alone lately. And well, the bars were empty with wwf being in the valley. Taker doesn't know why they'd come here, but apparently it was a good idea. Taker hears the door open but ignores it. If it's Paul, he hopes if he does ignore him he'll just go away.

He lifts his whiskey to his mouth for a sip when a lean figure sits at the bar. Taker doesn't hesitate to check the figure out, and he's glad he does. A pretty young thing with a lot of skin on show. "Uh just as many shots as possible please" the blonde smiles at the bartender. Clearly not alone, which takers glad because he won't have to watch out for him, but it also means any chances he might of had are gone. Taker turns his attention back to his whiskey and whatever shitty sports game is on.

Shawn glances at the big guy before carrying the tray of shots back to his friends. "And what are these bad Boys?" Kevin asks as shawn places the tray down. "Hell if I know. A shot of courage if you ask me" shawn smirks before taking one and downing it and taking another and downing it. "If your going back to the bar the least you could do is get hunter a drink he can actually drink" Scott chuckles. "How did you know?" Shawn asks. "I saw you eye fucking that hunk, go get him tiger" Kevin smirks. "Just atleast order me a water" hunter huffs. Shawn nods and struts his way back to the bar.

"A water aswell please" the southern voice asks. "For that table too" he adds. Taker looks as the blonde sits next to him. "Shawn Michaels" Shawn smiles. Taker doesn't say anything and it causes Shawn to frown. "Cmon? Nothing? Just gonna ignore me?" Shawn pouts. Taker takes a sip of his drink and looks back at the news. "Come on hot stuff, I promise I'm worth it. I always deliver" Shawn practically purrs at him.

Taker sighs and decides, screw it? Paul ain't around, what harm could come?

"Undertaker" Taker mutters. "Undertaker? Hmm how about Takes or Taker?" Shawn asks. "Sure" Taker murmurs. "Dont talk much huh?" Shawn asks. Taker doesn't say anything, he just watches Shawn. "Thats okay hot stuff, I can do enough talking for us both" Shawn smiles resting his arms on the bar. Taker just watches him. He swears he's seen his face before. "You a wrestling fan?" Shawn asks. "Not really. Haven't got the time to watch it. Actually surprised they came to the valley for a show" Taker admits. "Best show so far if you ask me" shawn smirks. "Yeah?" Taker asks. "Oh yeah, became champ and everything." And takers face flushed. Of course. A face he didn't recognise? Of course he was here for the show.

Shawn giggles at the flush building on the mans face. "Its alright big guy. I won't take offence if you tell me you don't know who I am" Shawn teases. "Shoulda put two and two together" Taker huffs rubbing his neck. Shawn smiles slightly and looks at the bartender. "Another drink for him and a beer for me please" Shawn orders. "Thanks" Taker mumbles. "Anytime sugar" Shawn turns towards taker more, taker blushes as shawn rests his hand on takers knee. "You don't wanna be with your friends celebrating your win?" Taker asks quietly. "Trust me darling, we will have plenty of chances to celebrate wins like this" shawn mutters leaning closer. Taker looks at the blondes eyes.

Those dangerous blues.

Those addictive dangerous blues.

Shawn smirks slightly as he cups takers face. "Are you always this shy?" Shawn asks quietly. His smirk falls as Taker grabs his wrist in his much bigger hands and leans in. "Sure, at first" Taker smirks. Shawns eyes widen slightly. "But after the pretty little thing has had their fun, I like to have mine" Taker adds, turning fully towards Shawn.

Shawn doesn't know what's happened but he can say he likes the sudden shift in Taker. From shy and aloof to this? Yes please.

Shawn can feel his cheeks burning as Taker tilts his head down. "How about you let me thank you for the drink?" Taker asks quietly, cupping the area between his jaw and neck. Shawn stares at him in Awe before nodding slightly. "Whats wrong boy toy? What happened to that big cocky I can talk for both of us?" Taker smirks. Shawn decides to shut him up by pulling him into a kiss. Taker hums before kissing him back, moving one hand to his hip and squeezing it tightly.

Taker pulls back slightly after sometime and watches amused as shawn fumbles to get the drink money out of his wallet. "Eager?" Taker asks as he watches the money get thrown onto the bar. "Whats closer? My hotel or your house?" Shawn asks, no longer wanting to play whatever game he thinks this is. Taker smirks as shawn stands. "You gonna talk to your friends before running off with a stranger?" Taker asks. "Look, if it's big they'll understand when they find my dead body. Just give me a good time first yeah? It's been a rough week" Shawn huffs grabbing takers hand and pulling him off his stool and out of the bar.

Kid lifts his head from the table and looks towards the bar. "Uh...guys?" Kid asks. "What?" Scott groans. "Shawn's gone" Kid points at the bar. Kevin looks at the money and untouched drinks. "Its a small town. If he's not back to leave tomorrow we'll know who to look for." Scott states. "Shouldn't we look now?" Hunter asks. "I trust shawns judgement. I know you guys don't but he's a lot better at reading humans than you'd think. I'm just glad he's finally getting laid again" Kevin huffs. "Now, someone grab those drinks, don't let them goto waste" Scott orders.

[pretty-prince-lulu]

SIDE CHARACTERS/COLONISTS TIME

have a readmore. I want to write words and I just took my ADHD meds so I'm having thoughts that come in sequence instead of pinging off each other like marbles falling down stairs

lyfield there has a social skill of zero and is abrasive, and yet is more popular than his highmate wife. for reasons I can understand.

mel and misambil there, a drakonori and a frost giant respectively (also a couple) are his absolute rock-solid BEST friends. they have maxed 100/100 best-friendship links. they come and train together all the time. they have also banded together to try and befriend caelum, a shy little animusen who spent his childhood as a selective mute and is incapable of the social worktype.

they also share tips and mutual lessons with each other in magic. Misamibil is a shadow (I guess you'd want some stealth counterbalance to the fact that you're 5 times everyone else's height), Mel is an apothecary and shares his potions with his BFF while they train and Lyfield is a shaman who can throw up healing totems and invoke Enrage on his friends when actual battle strikes, which causes them to do a fuckton of damage until it wears off.

Lyfield is also huge and apparently clumsy as fuck. He goes ass-first through at least one chair a day. He's a night owl and gets real shitty if he has to work during the day, but he mostly uses his night shifts to train, which means everyone in the colony is constantly hearing his fucking rifle. ALL night. every night. He's good at making weapons and clothing but 99% of the time he just wants to do combat training. he refuses any and all cleaning and he won't carry jack of shit.

Mel is a masochist who LOVES the cold, explaining his choice of spouse. (his real name is Tak. We're not sure why he calls himself Mel. I guess it does sound classier?). He mostly trains our animals. he LOVES cats (he will bond with them very fast), is 'angelically beautiful' and can grab people with his tail and just grip them until they're finished being fuckoffs. That royal coat is of apparently awful quality but I CANNOT get him to take it off and not put it back on immediately.

Misamibil is a quick sleeper, quite obviously absolutely massive, shares Roly's fondness for cannibalism (she still hates him but will apparently warm substantially if he learns some magic; we have... been unsuccessful teaching him so far), abrasive (hey, maybe that's why she clicks with Lyfield so well) and apparently sickly but I seldom see her catch very much. Maybe it's a relative term for frost jotuns. due to being the size of a Jeep she is a very good miner, but mostly (when she isn't training) she's one of our field medics. She has a good relationship with most people she's spent time with but she stays pissed off at the occasional apostates we get for a long while. I guess disavowing the faith that she has annoys her.

not forgetting, lyfield's wife, Varklir:

is one of our teachers for the colony's children. She has a perfect link with lyfield but that's mostly because she's a highmate; they have little in common and don't see each other while working much because the rifle range and the school are on opposite sides of the colony (which felt like a good idea to me).

she's a good teacher but to be honest she's kind of a bitch. she is aware that her coworker Crane is beautiful but is the only colony member that I've noticed that does not a bonus to their relationship with him for it. She does NOT care- in fact, she snubs him a bit because he also hasn't bothered trying to learn any magic. I'd contend he has a pretty good excuse for being the main schoolteacher and a key researcher on the side despite being a vampire subtype that still has to sleep, but she disagrees with my assessment. She's also kind of annoyed by her new student, Irocarve (half genie half highmate hence his baldness), as he has come to his first day of school without putting on pants first, and that gets a relationship penalty here. He also doesn't know magic, but he's listening to his lesson, which earns him a few singular points of opinion back. Jesus Christ, Varklir, he JUST turned three today.

She is a summoner, which I feel like is increasing her disdain of the colonists without magic as her summons are doing a significant portion of the work around the compound on their behalf. She was apparently a jeweler as a youth. Nimble, small and enlightened (meaning she's very resistant to being worn down by the constant magic tax caused by her summons). She is also apparently a martial artist, despite being incapable of violence, which means if she ever IS in a fight she can yoink the opponent's weapon and throw it to the ground. She's vengeful, but that trait has been suppressed by her Highmate blood. I would argue that the suppression is, uh, incomplete. She has negative relationship points with every single non-magician member of Chaos Gene.

I cannot decide if I like her or if she kind of annoys me...

[lazar-codes]

12/10/2023 || Day 96

I spent 4 hours today building a small program that's essentially a set of flashcards for the words I'm learning in my ASL class. I wanted to simply create a set of flashcards with Quizlet, but apparently the ability to add an image to a card is behind a paywall and I don't want to pay for that, so I decided I'll just create my own little flashcard system. The teacher writes words on the board during the class, and after class we're allowed to take pictures. The thing is, I'm remembering the sign for the corresponding word mostly by where it's written on the board and what other words it's grouped with, rather than remembering the sign for the word directly.

So, I built a little program that'll let me input words into an array, and I can ask the program to give me a random word in that array, and it worked! But then came the harder part; where do I store the data? I learned that you cannot write to a file from the frontend, so having a frontend json file will be no good, and I didn't want to store it in local storage because what if I accidentally delete my local storage? It would be a huge pain to write 100+ words and links to their signs over and over, so after some googling I learned that I'd need a backend so I can write to and append to a json file using Node js. Honestly, that's a little annoying because now I have to have a server running, but that's the only way I can think of to store data. I'm also planning on adding a feature where I can search for a specific word in my little database and it will give me the link to a video or gif of someone signing that word. But first, I gotta find those gifs/videos/pages and add them to the database.

This is also a really private project, and will only be used for personal use to remember ASL, so this won't be posted or hosted anywhere other than my local computer. The most obvious reason is because there are resources made by Deaf people that should be sought out for first. I'm personally just using this program so I don't have to google "ASL sign for XYZ" every time I forget how to sign something

[theladyofbloodshed]

me to me: you will not get burn out from writing 100, 000 words in six weeks

Part One ¦ Part Two ¦ Part Three ¦ Part Four ¦ Part Five ¦ Part Six ¦ Part Seven ¦ Part Eight ¦ Part Nine ¦ Part Ten ¦ Part Eleven ¦ Part Twelve

Part Thirteen

In five hundred years, Cassian had never known his brother to be anything other than calculating and wise. Wise beyond his years, in fact. No decision was ever rushed. Until this one. Until they had scant time to scoop up two mortal females with their belongings then save Nesta before she became fodder for a pyre. Cassian had at least expected Rhys to have had a conversation with Nesta’s sisters about bringing them to Velaris.

Instead, him and Azriel stood at the end of the path on guard while Rhys received a verbal lashing from Nesta’s youngest sister on the door step. It appeared that all of the Archeron sisters liked to cause trouble. This one had also apparently stabbed Rhys in the hand. Then went for a second attempt. Azriel had laughed himself hoarse and declared that Rhys needed to start training again.

‘The villagers will come for you when they can’t find your sister.’

‘Then we won’t answer the door.’

Rhys was close to tearing his perfectly styled hair out from going in circles with the mortal. ‘And they will just go away then? Are you that foolish to believe that?’

‘Elain is engaged to a man from the village. We cannot run away to Prythian with faeries we don’t know.’

‘You know Cassian and we’ve met previously. Out of the three of us, Azriel is the most virtuous so you really have nothing to worry about. Many females would love the opportunity to gallivant to Prythian with us.’

Cassian’s skin was crawling. That fiery bond which connected him to Nesta the moment she’d offered him food was itching so close to her. He was desperate to find her. He had to keep tamping down on those instincts to leave the others and seek her out. It was too dangerous for them to be here again. Dangerous to linger so long. Especially when their general could not focus on anything but the curve of Nesta’s lips.

‘Stop saying females. We are women.’

Feyre was going toe to toe with Rhys, meeting him with every snap and snarl, not caring who he was. Cassian wasn’t even sure if she knew just who he really was.

‘Feyre, I am asking you, do you truly believe this Graysen won’t be part of the witch hunt that is after Nesta? Do you truly believe his father – with the largest manor in your village – won’t be leading the hunt?’

She worried her bottom lip with her teeth, uncertainty settling in. Cassian had seen the manor the night he’d been shot. It was a fortress of stone and ash. Perfect for hurting the fae. He was a male with the most to lose from their perfect harvests coming to an end without Nesta's sacrifice.

‘Will your father come to your aid?’  

The uncertainty bloomed. Feyre shifted on her feet. ‘And if we wanted to return here?’

‘Then you have my word it will happen. You are not a prisoner. This is to save you.’ Before any of them could react, Rhys had slit open his palm so ruby red blood dribbled from it.

‘What the fuck is he doing?’ Azriel hissed.

‘On my blood, I vow that you will come to no harm, Feyre Archeron. You or your sisters.’

That seemed to be enough to convince her. The prick had never sworn a blood vow to them in five centuries.

‘I need five minutes to pack,’ she murmured as she slipped back through the front door.

Azriel whirled on his high lord. ‘What is wrong with you? A blood vow? To a mortal?’

 A guilty expression took over Rhys’ usual confident exterior. His brows tugged together. ‘I don’t know. I just had to do it. I can't explain it.’

The shadow singer pressed two fingers to his temples with a wearied sigh. ‘I have a high lord spilling his blood for a mortal girl and a general who is panting like a dog at the thought of seeing her sister. Why is Mor not here with me for support?’

‘She’s waiting in Velaris preparing their rooms so they feel more comfortable.’

‘I hope Nesta’s is soundproofed from whatever unspeakable acts those two are about to commit.’

There was a smell of smoke on the air. Cassian’s heart thumped harder with every passing minute. If they waited any longer then Nesta could be in serious danger.

When the two sisters emerged, the middle one was sobbing. She clutched at Feyre who pulled her further out of the doorway with a grunt. Only one bag was stuffed with clothes and whatever else they deigned worthy of bringing to Prythian. It had to be scary for them – and Cassian was trying his best not to rush them, but he had waited long enough for Nesta.

‘You can take the crying one,’ he murmured to Azriel then shoved him forwards a step.

The middle one did not want to go. She begged Feyre to see sense, vowed that her fiancée would never do such a thing. She’d even said a prayer when Azriel had stepped closer to her and extended an arm.

‘Very sorry,’ Cassian said, striding towards her, ‘We don’t have time for this.’

Roughly, he hauled Elain over his shoulder and started for the woods. He felt a hand smack his arm and the youngest was there stinging him over and over like a wasp.

‘Rhysand.’

Rhys sucked in a breath. ‘Sorry, Feyre.’ His magic enveloped her, wrapping around her thrashing ankles and wrists to bind them then Rhys had her in his arms.

Behind them, Azriel spluttered. ‘Are we seriously kidnapping mortals?’

‘You can carry the bag,’ Cassian grunted before breaking into flight.

***

‘Do not rush it, Lucien. Has a woman never told you that good things aren’t to be rushed? We must go slow and enjoy every moment.’

‘I’ve never had complaints,’ he replied, as he dipped another rag into the faerie wine that Nesta had stolen from the Spring Court.

‘No, I suppose your hand cannot speak back to you.’

Lucien laughed with a sardonic shake of the head. ‘When the general of the Night Court spikes your head outside the Hewn City, I will try to pay a visit to admire his work.’

‘Maybe he’ll chop off yours and spike it next to mine. Then we can talk for eternity.’

‘I’d rather a crow pecked my eyes out.’

Nesta wrinkled up her nose. ‘Don’t you mean eye?’

‘You are not a nice person,’ Lucien admonished as they finished setting up her ring of pyres.

‘I never claimed to be.’

The pyres were almost all connected by a ring of clothing that she had chopped into rags and soaked in alcohol. The circle was broken only to create a path to the cabin. Nesta had roped Lucien into helping her collect the rest of her kills from snares and the male had been kind enough to take down a deer for her with a cleverly timed arrow through its rib cage. Its head was mounted above her door and they’d feasted on the rich meat throughout the day as they worked. They spread its organs like a macabre pathway to her door.

Lucien had claimed to have bedded a witch and offered more advice to make her home convincing. He also claimed to have bedded a dryad, a water nymph, and even a norn. Nesta had asked him why he thought she’d be interested in his sexual exploits and he gave a dazzling smile instead of an answer. Thank goodness he’d not been the one to land on her roof or she would have beaten him with the broom until he died.

‘It’s a long way to the Hewn City from here. You might feel as if you’re suffocating. I don’t know if a mortal has ever winnowed that far. You might die.’

‘My death will be on your hands.’

‘I shall try not to weep, my lady.’

Nesta inspected her work as the final rays of sun bleached the sky to a bruised blue. ‘On the contrary, I’d prefer it if you did. Mourn me like a saint.’

They drank a cup of the faerie wine in a toast; Nesta tipped most of hers into the snow to Lucien’s horror because it tasted like anise and fire on her tongue. She’d coughed through her first mouthful.

‘Nesta Archeron – the exile.’

‘The witch of the wood,’ Lucien said, sinking the remainder of his cup.

With his keen hearing, Lucien could make out the sounds of at least twenty sets of boots trampling through the snow towards them. But Nesta didn’t make a move until she heard it herself. Sure enough, the men from her village were surrounding her cabin on all sides like wolves shepherding their pray. Their torches bled into the darkness, pinpointing their positions.

‘Are you ready, my lady?’

Nesta knelt in the snow, not caring that it soaked through her dress to her stockings and spread. Sparks burst from her striker then her kindling caught alight.

Lucien yanked her back as the pyre burst into flames though the ends of her hair were singed from the smell of it.

‘How strong is that alcohol?’

‘Strong,’ Lucien replied. ‘It’s from the Day Court. Thank them.’

The pyre burnt then the flames crawled to the rag that connected it to the next and the next until her cabin in the woods was ringed by massive fires that billowed smoke into the night.

‘An excellent use of the Spring Court hay, I must say.’

‘It looks beautiful, doesn’t it?’

The villagers were closing in around them, their cries and shouts of “witch” growing ever louder. They clamoured for her death. For one to steak her through the heart.

‘Can I add a touch?’ Lucien asked, nudging her with his elbow.

She had the sense he quite liked teasing mortals. He’d teased her enough that day – and she to him. Nesta nodded, ‘As long as it’s not murder.’

‘I’ll try to refrain.’

Lucien swept his hand through the air then ball of flame gathered itself in his palm. It burnt as red as blood. He tossed it at the roof then watched in appreciation as it burnt.

‘Green is more witch-like.’

Nesta heard his small, reluctant laugh but sure enough, the flames devouring the roof of her cabin turned a shade of emerald and the edges were tinged with black.

The scarred male extended his hand to her, ‘My lady?’

***

Most of the villagers were pissing their pants and running in the other direction when they got to the woods. If terror wasn’t squeezing every muscle of his body, Cassian might have laughed at whatever Nesta had done to them.

He hefted a crying Elain into Azriel’s arms like she was a sack of flour.

He bellowed Nesta’s name.

An arrow flew at them, narrowly skimming past his wing. His siphons flashed in answer, ready for a fight after weeks spent cooped up in Illyria.

‘Where is she?’

The cabin had been transformed into a nightmare. Rhys had told him as much, but it was different to see it for himself. There was blood smeared all over the walls outside, the roof was aflame, and they could barely see through all the smoke. His Nesta who had cried when he'd tried to get her to kill a rabbit had managed this.

With their eyesight, they had an advantage at least over the villagers who were stumbling blindly across the snow, covering their eyes with their cloaks to stop the smoke stinging them.

Again, Cassian called her name.

But something wasn’t right.

The bond between them was taut once more as though Nesta had gone far away. He’d know if she was hurt. He’d tear the world apart to find her.

‘Cass, we can’t keep these mortals here.’

Another arrow hit the tree beside Azriel.

‘They serve the witch!’

The mortals only saw three massive, winged fingers through the smoke, illuminated by the twisting ribbons of flame. They did not know they were fae.

‘She’s pretending she’s a witch,’ Cassian muttered under his breath. ‘Of course, she is.’

‘If she knows a way to Spring, she might have gone there,’ Azriel said. His own cobalt siphons were bright in the dark, anticipating a fight against these mortal men.

Cassian couldn’t deny that he wanted to hurt them. They had come for his mate. They’d have broken her before they killed her.

‘I’ll take them to Velaris. Then return here. Find Nesta. Az – don’t lose him.’

Elain still cried even as she was placed into Rhys’ arms, but Feyre at least had set her mouth into a thin line as she watched the remainder of her villagers ransack the cabin in search of Nesta.  

The situation wasn’t ideal. All Cassian could think of was that his mate might be running through these woods with fear in her heart, running from her death. His temper was on the edge. Azriel would be stuck to him, ensuring he didn’t go too far. But if he couldn’t find Nesta then there were no limits to what he wouldn’t do.

A wind whipped through the woods, clearing a sheet of smoke.

Two mortals guarding the front of the property whirled towards them, swords raised. The younger one stopped.

‘Elain?’

It made Elain stop crying. Her face fell into disbelief.

‘You would… You would harm my sister?’

‘Faeries,’ the other man bellowed, rousing the remaining mortals.

From the corner of his eye, Cassian saw Rhys disappear into nothing, taking the younger two Archerons with him.

‘Ready brother?’ Azriel asked, voice low and dangerous.

They would only do to the mortals what they sought to do to them. For every raise of the sword, the Illyrians met them with lethal accuracy. The ones that ran, could run. They’d let them go. Let them believe they served the witch who haunted these woods.

When it was done, when nine mortal men lay dead in the snow, they stopped.

Their blood was indistinguishable from the blood already spread by Nesta. Cassian knew in his heart that it was not hers. It could not be. He would know if any harm had come to her.

His instincts were pushing at the seams, determined to come out. If he let them, Cassian would slaughter that whole village, including the father who never fought for Nesta; the one who let her be exiled.

They flew low through the trees, hunting for a lone figure making her way to the Wall. Even with their vision, no tracks could be seen upon the fresh snow.

‘She’s not here.’

‘I fucking know that,’ Cassian snarled.

They landed back at the cabin then seconds later, Rhys winnowed in. ‘No sign of her?’

Azriel moved quickest, shoving Cassian back before he could get to Rhys. He couldn’t take these stupid questions. Every minute that they’d tarried had been a minute that they pushed Nesta closer to danger. He never should have agreed to finding her last. Never should have waited until darkness. They could have swept in, winnowed to the door and taken her. Taken her weeks ago rather than locking him up in Illyria.

Rhys sniffed the air. ‘That’s Helion’s wine.’

‘I don’t give a shit if the Mother herself made the wine.’

His violet eyes narrowed on roof. ‘It’s green. Fire isn't usually green.’

‘Azriel, protect your high lord because I’m about to knock his teeth out.’

Rhys held up a hand. ‘It’s burning by magic.’

‘Autumn? Not Eris, surely not.’

Azriel’s shadows darkened as they slithered across the ground like vipers. ‘You said she’s been going to Spring.’

‘Lucien Vanserra.’

‘If that little Vanserra whelp touches her, I will make him wish his father had killed him.’

@mis-lil-red