#i didn't tell her about it though i just asked how she is now boards are over

[snixx]

rip fags the random self mutilating urge to text my ex in the middle of math won out today

[singmyaubade]

No Longer Yours

James Potter x Female!Reader

IB: In The Cold November Rain by @sweetsweetjellybean (Make sure to check it out, it’s incredible and one of the best I’ve ever read !)

A/N: First, I wanna say thank you to @sweetsweetjellybean for letting me be inspired by her story even though I am stupid, lol, but seriously (not kissing ass), check her series out; it is fantastic. Thank you to everyone for the kind comments, reblogs, and likes. I'm overwhelmed with love, and I'm so thankful that people actually want to read more of what I write but anyways, enjoy!

Summary: James had disregarded you for multiple years, but when you have an epiphany in your final year, how does it feel to taste his own medicine?

Warning: It may contain swearing and soon-to-be smut.

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

"Are you sure you don't want me to walk you all the way?" Your mother asked, squeezing your hand.

"I'll be fine," You caressed her hand, "I'm still your baby, though."

She laughed lightly, "Make sure to write always," She held your face with her hands, "Have fun; it's your last year."

You touched her hand on your cheek, "I will."

You hugged her one last time, taking in her scent. Every time you said bye to her, it was as sad as the first, without you crying and begging to stay.

"Okay," She smiled, taking her hands off your face, "Are you still sure you don't wanna wait for James here? I mean, you've done it all these years."

Little did she know, you had been ignoring James's letters, all 128 of them. He had been persistent, asking you what was wrong and begging for a reply to know you were safe.

You even received a letter from his mother, Euphemia Potter, asking how you were and everything was in Paris. You would never have it in your heart to ignore Ms. Potter, so you replied dutifully and happily.

And then you got a letter from him saying,

Dear Y/n,

Are you really going to reply to my mother and not me?

Sincerely,

Your BEST FRIEND, James Potter.

You didn't reply, scoffing at the bolded best friend. The last letter you received was last week, him telling you he couldn't wait to see you and wanted to talk as soon as he got to you.

Bullshit.

"Yeah," You gulped, "I'm just gonna meet him inside."

"Well, I'm sure he misses you," She started fixing your coat, "I mean, you have been in Paris all of this time, and I just think it would be good for you to-"

You cut her off, pecking her cheek, "Love you!" You yelled, going towards the train.

She shook her head, "Be safe!"

You smiled at her, going through the wall to the train. The feeling still felt the same, nostalgic. This was the last time boarding the train, and it felt sad.

You remembered the first time you ever boarded it. James was practically high on excitement on his first day at Hogwarts. You were scared out of your bloody mind, not wanting to leave your mum and dad.

When you had finally stopped crying and holding onto your mother's leg, James was the one to hold your hand and tell you that he would take care of you.

Maybe that was the first time you had realized James was more than a friend to you, or perhaps you were a naive child.

But either way, he was the one that you needed protecting from. You realized he hadn't been your friend since the fourth year.

But this year wasn't about James; it was about you having the best last year of Hogwarts that you could have ever had.

You boarded the train, moving through the compartments to where Marlene, Mary, Dorcas, and Lily usually were.

Compartment 222.

It was pretty lucky; it is where you guys first met.

You opened the compartment, "Did you guys miss me?"

They excitedly cheered, "Now tell me, Y/n, how many French boys did you end up shagging in France?" Marlene asked.

"I would say about thirty, oui oui." You joked in a French accent as they all started laughing.

You sat down next to Dorcas, giving her a side hug. You saw Lily and Mary whisper something to each other, to which Mary said, "Just say it!"

You could see Dorcas in the corner of your eye, shaking her head no aggressively. Apparently, Marlene was the only one not in the plan, continuing to look at her newsletter.

Your eyebrow raised, "Am I missing something?"

"It's really nothing," Lily nervously said.

"Okay, so what is it?" You laughed.

"Well," Lily fiddled with her fingers, "You know how you specifically requested that none of us tell James that you were replying to our letters and not purposely ignoring him."

You said, "Uhuh." Already knowing where this going.

"Well, I accidentally let it slip out over the letter you had spoken to Marlene and me." She admitted.

Your mouth agape, "Lily."

"I know, I know," She groaned, "It was a total accident."

"How do you accidentally slip something out over letter?" Marlene snorted, earning a glare from Lily, but she still looked at her newsletter.

"What did he say after?" You asked, kneading your forehead.

"Why is she ignoring me?" Lily answered, "I just said it was none of my business, nor was I involved."

The group stayed in silence, waiting for you to reply.

You sighed, thinking about how much James would bother you more now that he knew you ignored him.

"Are you mad at me?" Lily asked quietly.

"No, of course not," You smiled, looking at her, "I just don't want to talk to him and explain everything,"

"Who says you have to?" Mary asked.

You looked at her confused, "I just can't ignore him." You said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"And why not?" Marlene asked, now looking at you.

You opened your mouth to reply, but nothing came out. You thought about it harder, and why wouldn't you be able to ignore James? Maybe it was hard because you have never done it before.

"So I just don't reply when he tries to talk to me?" You asked.

"Well, I don't support this, but," Lily started, "You could always just walk away when he says something to you."

"Wouldn't that be mean?" You asked.

"What did I tell you in person and in the letter?" Dorcas asked as you looked at her.

"Give him hell."

"So do it." She said.

They were right; you couldn't keep explaining to James what he did wrong; you just had to be done with him. You missed your friendship, but it took a turn years ago; you never said anything.

And you had to start not caring about him.

"So, how was your guy's summer?" You changed the subject, grinning as Marlene went on about how she perfected her Quidditch skills and would finally be the best chaser at Hogwarts.

Then Lily talked about her poetry that she started over the summer and how her sister had ripped a few of them, but she fixed them with a single swish of her wand and appreciated magic more.

Mary talked about how many soap operas she had seen and how she might even go into it after she graduates from Hogwarts.

Lastly, Dorcas talked about how this year was her year to be a seeker and how she got a whole book collection from her sister in New Zealand.

You began talking about how you tasted so many new foods and learned a bit of French, showing off your knowledge of the profound language.

You were interrupted by someone opening the compartment doors, "Hello," Remus greeted as you stood up to hug him immediately.

He caught you as you almost made him fall over by the movement, "Remmy, how much I have missed you," You said, kissing him on the cheek.

"And Y/n, how was France?" He asked, smiling.

"Quite a bore; every man was all over me; I was getting exhausted," You exhaled, sitting back in your seat.

"Well, if you ever want to get with a real man, I'm here, Y/n," Sirius said, nudging next to you as you looked disgusted.

"Did you have to bring him?" Dorcas asked Remus, rolling her eyes.

"He insisted," Remus shrugged.

"There needs to be some form of restraining order against him by all of us," Mary sighed.

"I thought his STDs were enough of a restraining order for us to keep away from him," Marlene teased.

Sirius interrupted before another insult could be made, "Ladies, this Sirius Black hate train is honestly starting to hurt," He pretended to be hurt.

"Aww, poor baby," You said in a baby voice, pinching his cheek as he swooshed your hand away.

"Now, Y/n, why are you ignoring poor Prongs?" Sirius asked as you wanted to throw him out of the train through the window.

"I thought he told you to dance around the question," Remus snorted.

Sirius disregarded, "What did my poor, stupid boy do this time?"

"I'm afraid it's none of your business, Black." You simply said.

"It is my business when my friend is sulking and bringing down my mood," He explained, "So why are you upset with him?" He asked.

Marlene abruptly laughed, "I'm sorry, but he really thought you would be the one Y/n would say something to,"

Sirius fake-laughed, "Oh McKinnon, I'll be laughing like that when you fall off of your arse on the field,"

Marlene mocked his facial expression as he did the same thing to her.

"May I please just arrive in peace without one word of James Potter? I'm begging." You reasoned.

"Well, at least I can tell him I tried and that Moony was no help." He glared at Remus.

"I told you I wasn't going to talk to her for him; it was all up to you," Remus said as Sirius went outside, and Remus waved everyone goodbye before closing the doors.

You could already tell it was going to be a long year.

After finally sorting the first year, everyone was allowed to dine. One thing you always missed about Hogwarts was the fantastic food; it was always incredible.

You were sitting in between Remus and Dorcas when Remus abruptly got up.

"Where are you going?" You asked, mid-laugh from a joke Marlene had made about Dumbledore and McGonagall in their secret chamber.

"Don't kill me," Remus stated before leaving. You looked confused, and James took the spot in front of you. You rolled your eyes, turning back to your meal.

"Please talk to me, Y/n," James pleaded.

You continued to stay silent, not even giving him a look as you looked at Marlene. She shook her head, and you continued to eat.

"I just wanna know what I did," James begged.

When you still didn't respond, he grabbed ahold of your wrist in an attempt for you to look at him.

"Don't fucking touch me." You spat before getting up and leaving the dining hall, telling your friends you were just gonna meet them in the dorm.

You tried rushing to the common room, but James was behind you.

"Y/n!" He yelled, speed-walking after you.

You continued to ignore him, going to the common room until you were stuck with the singing lady at the door who would not give it a rest.

"You have to talk to me," James demanded while the lady continued to screech.

"I don't have to do a thing you say," You scoffed, "In fact, I would prefer if you screwed off and stopped talking to me."

You went to one of the corridors, trying to escape him, but he followed you.

"Can't you just explain to me what I could've done for you to treat me like this?" He said roughly.

You turned to him, "There is not a single, simple explanation of what you could've done; there is a book of things," You snapped, "And treat you like this? Ever since I fucking stepped foot into your life, you have continued to treat me like shit." You stepped closer, "I stuck with you despite Lily, despite what other people said, and despite what you have shown me."

He continued to stay silent, "And now that I finally stick up for myself, I've done you horribly? Bullshit." You spat, "You have continued to show me exactly why I will never ever love you again, and yeah, for a matter of fact, I did love you, but you don't deserve me and never will."

Your words shocked him, not being able to mutter a word.

"Now you have nothing to say?" You manically laughed, "The smooth-talking and fantastic golden boy that shocked the century has nothing to say? What a pathetic-"

He kissed you suddenly precipitously, his tongue entering your mouth, entangling with yours.

For a second, you were drunk on his mouth, engaging with his kiss with as much passion as he gave you. His hand pulls on your hair lightly, making you moan.

His lips went from your mouth to your neck, sucking hard, red marks into your skin, knowing it would bruise.

Then you remembered everything. You remembered James's bitter words, his voice mocking you, and the boys laughing in the locker room.

You pushed his hard chest off you, breathing hard from the whole interaction. He looked at you, breathing as hard as you; realizing what he had done, he tried to touch your hand, but you pushed him again.

Tears brimmed in your eyes, "You're such an asshole," You cried, going to the Gryffindor common room.

You rushed up the stairs, immediately going into your bed. You couldn't believe what had just happened.

A part of you wanted to be grateful, grateful that you pushed him off, and realized that he only wanted to be with you when he felt convenient.

Another part of you wanted to continue kissing him, laughing with him, hugging him. You knew it wouldn't be easy, but you had never figured it would be painful.

What if you had loved James for so long that you didn't know anything but to love him?

It was stupid and pathetic.

You were tired of being stupid and pathetic, you just wanted to move on from James Potter and get away from him, and if that wasn't possible, you had to make him regret being friends with you in the first place.

So you did.

You got up fresh and early in the morning when all of your roommates were sleeping, taking a shower immediately.

You looked in the mirror, your mascara smudged and dark red and purple hickies wearing your skin. You placed a shit-load of powder and concealer to cover up the parts you could.

You tried several spells to cover it up as best as possible, changing into your uniform.

You slipped into the most showing tights you could and wore your skirt from the fifth year that you so obviously outgrew, showing almost your ass cheeks.

You would be thankful not to get a write-up from McGonagall.

You unbuttoned two buttons off the top of your shirt, showing a tiny bit of your bra. It wasn't the most rebellious or seductive, but it could work.

The first challenge of that day was Potions; all of your friends were there, including all of the Marauders. But, thanks to Merlin was also Jacob Carrow's class, the Slytherin Captain that James hated with a burning passion.

They both could not be in the same room without spitting a hateful insult at the other. James once had a dream that you and Jacob had gone out, and he refused to talk to you for an entire day until you convinced him you would never do that.

You never considered yourself a liar.

The only problem was that Jacob was a dickhead, but so was James. You were surprised they didn't get along, maybe in another life.

You went inside Potions with your friend group, and you spotted Jacob Carrow in the back with an empty seat next to him as you told your friends you were gonna sit in the back.

You were thankful none of his friends were around him; it would be ten times more unbearable.

You sat next to him with a wide grin painted on your face, trying not to show your pain.

"Sitting next to me, Y/n?" He smirked, "I thought you were Potter's little puppy."

You tried to ignore your annoyance, "Pets tend to lean away from their owner at points; I guess that's my case." You shrugged.

"I am no Potter; I don't like having little girls follow me and do my shit for me." You could tell he was insulting you, but you stood tall.

"Good thing girls don't like to be in your presence." You snickered.

He smiled, "Love a kitty with claws," He leaned into his chair, "What do you want?"

"Do I have to want something?" You asked, popping your chest out to show your tits as he looked down at your face.

"You finally trying to make your boy toy jealous?" He asked.

You dropped the facade, "Are you gonna help me or not?"

"Control the temper, baby; I just wanna know what's in it for me." His body faced you.

"Isn't James being angry enough?" You asked.

"Nah, I can piss off Potter by just existing." He replied.

"What do you want?" You asked, half-annoyed.

"Meadows on a date with me."

You laughed, "Dorcas would never go on a date with you."

"Then no deal." He said with a fake smile.

"Ugh, fine, I'll talk to her if you just make James's life hell for a few minutes." You said.

"Okay, deal." He smiled, "Do you want me to touch you or,"

"Sure, but don't overdo it." You warned.

"I love when you flatter yourself." He said as James walked in, laughing with the Marauders.

Jacob immediately placed a hand on your thigh, slightly higher than preferred, but you continued smiling.

You started fake-laughing at Jacob's joke, which immediately caught James's attention. You looked behind you, and James's head looked like it would explode.

You looked back at Carrow, touching his shoulder and admiring how much muscle he had.

"What else do you want me to do?" He said through his teeth.

"I'll scoot closer to you, and you can put your hand on my waist." You suggested as he nodded.

You faced the front as Jacob touched your waist, tickling you with his fingers as you laughed.

"Mind keeping it down?" James scowled, "Not everyone wants to fucking hear that shit."

"How about you piss off, Potter?" Jacob mocked as he gripped your waist tighter, which pissed off James even more.

Before James could say another word, Slughorn started the class.

Throughout the class, Jacob would squeeze your thigh or tickle you, almost rising to touch your tits. Whenever he did those actions, you would giggle, earning daggers from James.

Once Slughorn instructed everyone to look inside their microscopes at the different ingredients used in Veritaserum, you took the opportunity to sit on Jacob's lap, looking in the microscope as he bounced you with his knee, causing you to laugh.

This really pissed James off, him storming up to you both. He grabbed your arm, practically flying you off of Jacob.

"Mr. Potter!" Slughorn yelled as the class watched the entire thing.

"Don't you dare fucking touch her," James said brusquely.

Jacob scoffed, "What will you do about it, Potter?" He stood, going closer to James.

You rolled your eyes due to the amount of testosterone in this conversation.

James got closer as you grabbed his hand, pushing him back, "Stop it." You said to him as he looked at you.

He grabbed your wrist, dragging you out of the classroom to an abandoned bathroom.

"James, let go of me!" You yelled as he pushed you inside the bathroom.

He was fuming, and you could tell which scared you. You hadn't seen him this angry since he lost a Quidditch match against the very man's lap you were on.

"You dragged me in here, so is there something you have to say?" You looked at him angrily, hands on your hips.

"Us not being friends anymore doesn't allow you to be a slut," He ridiculed.

You slapped him, "Don't you fucking dare call me a slut; I can do whatever the fuck I want,"

He wiped his mouth with a smile, "You think he gives a shit about you? He would fuck you and then dump you." He said as he moved closer, and you backed up.

"You don't know a thing," You replied nervously.

"He wouldn't even clean you up after," He continued, "He would let you rot there like a slut," Another step closer, which you took backward. You didn't understand if he purposely tried to intimidate or lecture you.

He didn't stop.

"He would tell all of his friends after," Another step, "He wouldn't dare spare you a minute after," Another step, "You would mean nothing," You were backed into the wall now, "But it's okay because you can do whatever the fuck you want."

"James." You kept eye contact with him, his eyes beaming into yours.

His mouth lowered to your ear, "But I think you want me to give a shit; you wanna see me mad." His hand snaked to your waist, "I guess you win." His body left yours, storming out of the bathroom.

Did you really win?

A/N: Y/n: 2, James 0??? There is also an alternate chapter to this because I couldn't stop writing two plots LOL.

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[rafesaddiction]

It's not cheating when he's your stepbrother – Rafe Cameron x Reader

Summary: You lie about your first kiss. Will you lie about your first time too?

You are Rafe's stepsister, just graduated from boarding school and here for the summer holidays before you'll leave for college. You and Rafe used to be close, but that changed, years ago. Now he is distant and mean, and something else happens when you have your first boyfriend. A nice guy, a sweet guy, nothing like Rafe.

Concept: stepsiblings, first time, just the tip

Warnings: mdni! – smut, noncon/dubcon, rough sex, p in v, loss of virginity (virgin!reader), fingering, stepcest, violence, slapping, manhandling, mentions of child abuse (ward physically and emotionally abusing rafe), cheating (reader cheating on boyfriend), name calling (rafe calls reader slut and whore), angst, dark!rafe, mean!rafe, this starts off kinda sweet but gets quite dark.

When reading this, please do so at your own discretion. Keep in mind, this is just a work of fiction.

Word count: 9.0k (holy fuck! how did that happen?)

tagging @ashy-kit since you asked. I hope you'll like this.

“Wait! Was that actually your first kiss? Oh my god! It was!”

Sarah stared at you with large eyes, then covered her mouth, laughing. You just smiled, shrugged, and averted your gaze, feeling heat in your cheeks. It was a bit embarrassing that your younger stepsister had more experience with boys than you did. The reason for that might have been that you had gone to an all-girls boarding school practically your whole life. But truth was, if anything, away from parents, kids had even more opportunities at boarding school to gain sexual experience, be it with other students, local boys, or even teachers. You knew that a lot of your classmates did much more than just kiss when sneaking out at night. But you weren't the type to sneak out at night. You were the type to get your first kiss at 18 after graduating from said boarding school.

“Tell us more,” Wheezie insisted. She sat next to you on the couch, cross-legged, looking at you, eager to hear your story. You smiled at your little stepsister. You two had grown closer over the past years, with Wheezie discovering the internet and thus being able to chat with you even when you were hundreds of miles away at school.

“Denny is quite a good kisser though. You’re lucky, he was your first,” Sarah said, grabbing a handful of popcorn from the bowl on the coffee table in front of her.

You knew that Sarah had hooked up with Denny. So you had, of course, told her when he had asked you out. Sarah was totally okay with it, she even encouraged you to text him back, when he texted you. Denny hadn't been her boyfriend, just one of her hook-ups, ages ago. And as of now, Sarah was too happily in love with her pogue boyfriend to be jealous at all. It was kind of a forbidden romance, Wheezie had told you all about it, but Sarah herself also liked to share, she loved talking about her boyfriend and his pogue friends and their way of living. And you liked to listen to her exciting stories or when she complained about her father or brother. You liked that you were kind of close, even though you only spent the summer and Christmas holidays at Tannyhill.

Your mother had you at a very young age and you were practically raised by your grandma. When your mother married Ward Cameron, you were old enough to be send off to one of the most prestigious boarding schools in the country. The school was in another state, but could as well have been on another continent. Your mother didn't want to have you in her new life, she already had three new kids to look after. Ward wouldn’t have minded, he made sure you knew that you were as much a daughter to him as Sarah and Wheezie. He showed his affection by paying for your expensive education. Now that you had graduated from high school, you were supposed to spend the summer before going to an ivy league school with your family in the Outer Banks.

“Did you close your eyes? Did you feel butterflies? Did he do the neck grab?” Wheezie kept shooting one question after the other and you felt your face must have been glowing. You looked away, trying to think of what to answer, when your eyes met a pair of intense blue eyes, staring at you from across the room.

Rafe, your older stepbrother, stood in the hallway, looking at you. And for some reason, you felt that damn heat had reached your ears. You quickly looked away, turning to Sarah, who was telling Wheezie that she shouldn't base her expectations on tiktoks and fanfics.

The kiss happened the night before at a kook party. You had been texting and hanging out with Denny for about two weeks. He was your age, he was charming, smart, the former captain of the football team. He was actually so good that he got a scholarship to play at a college team. Not that he would have needed the scholarship to go to college, his parents were one of the wealthiest kook families on the island. Almost as rich and influential as the Camerons. Of course, you knew Denny before, the island was small and he was one of your stepbrother's friends. But this whole thing with him only started about two weeks ago when you quite literally ran into him at the country club. He insisted on buying you another drink even though you were the one who spilled your drink on him. He texted you later, he got your number from Sarah, and, since Sarah was encouraging you, you texted back and agreed to go on a date with him. You had been on four dates already: dinner, a trip to the beach, another dinner, and a date on his family's yacht, when you went to the party with him the previous night. And then it just happened. He kissed you outside the house where the party was. It was a starry night and the kiss was nice. And after, he took your hand and walked inside with you and you smiled, as you felt the warmth of his hand around yours.

“I'll get us some fresh popcorn, then we can start the movie, okay?” You grabbed the half-empty bowl and got up from the couch, while your stepsisters were in some serious discussion about some actor from a show you had never heard of.

You left the living room and walked past Rafe, who didn't seem to have moved an inch. You didn't look up at him when you spoke to him.

“You wanna join us and watch a movie with us? It's Wheezie's choice tonight, so I guess it's whatever is trending on netflix at the moment,” you said and were about to head for the kitchen, when suddenly his hand wrapped around your arm. You stopped and looked up at him, gasping.

Rafe leaned down to you, and you felt his hand gripping tighter around your arm. You winced and were about to say something, when you met his eyes. Dark blue orbs staring at you, so very close to you.

“Why did you lie?”

You frowned in confusion.

“Why did you lie and say that that was your first kiss?”

You just gazed up at him. And despite the heat in your face, you felt a shiver running down your spine.

You parted your lips, wanting to say something, but he cut you off.

“I hate liars.”

And then he let go off you, turned around and just left, and you felt your heart beating in your chest, so rapidly, so loudly, your stepsisters in the other room must have heard it. You stepped back from the door, your back pressing against the wall, as you tried to compose yourself.

He was right. That kiss wasn't your first kiss.

Your first kiss happened with Rafe when you were 15 and he was 17.

It was right after Christmas. Before New Year's Eve. It was late at night and you decided to have a hot chocolate before going to sleep. You met Rafe in the kitchen, standing at the open fridge, rummaging it for some leftovers from dinner. He was wearing that ridiculous Christmas sweater with the reindeer over his sleeping shorts. You couldn't help but giggle at the sight of him. He was already tall then, not as tall as he was now, but much taller than you. He was lean, less bulky. He was a boy still and he grinned like one, when he turned to look at you.

“What's so funny? You laughing at me?”

“Nothing, nothing,” you shook your head, grinning, “Sven.”

You squealed and giggled when Rafe launched a tickle-attack on you.

It used to be so easy around him. He was always sweet, sometimes teasing, but always in a sweet way. He was protective and you felt safe with him. You were closer then, and it was just easy to be yourself with him.

You got into a real tickle fight with him, chasing each other around the kitchen, as he finally got you.

“Stop, stop, stop! I surrender!” You said, out of breath. Your cheeks hurting from laughing so hard.

He stopped tickling you, but his hands still rested on your sides, and he stood very close in front of you. Your own hands clutching that ridiculous sweater of his. He looked down at you. His hair disheveled, his cheeks flushed, his chest heaving, his lips parted. He didn't laugh or grin and your own laughing had stopped too. All you heard was your rapid heartbeat and both of you panting.

And his hand touched your cheek. You felt a little spark, but instead of withdrawing, you leaned into his touch. Your lips parted as he leaned closer. His face so close, you could hardly make out his features, so you closed your eyes, and breathed in. And it was his scent that filled your lungs, before you felt his lips on yours. And that contact sent a wave of some yet unknown sensation through your body, and you felt it everywhere, felt it in your fingertips that grabbed the sweater. Felt it in your toes as you stood on them to meet Rafe's lips. Felt it on your skin, where he touched you, felt it under your skin. Felt it coursing through your veins.

A distant sound, and Rafe suddenly broke the kiss. In a state of daze you opened your eyes and moved them to what Rafe was staring at. Or to who.

Ward was standing in the door to the kitchen. His presence towering both of you. You shuddered and jumped away from Rafe.

You slowly walked backwards, your heart racing, sudden fear being the dominant emotion. But when Ward came closer, his attention wasn't focused on you. He hardly seemed to notice that you were even there. He glared at his son, glared at Rafe who just stood there, as if he was paralyzed by fear, unable to move.

You didn't wait for what happened, you chose flight and ran past Ward, ran up to your room, locking the door. You heard no screaming, no yelling, though you had expected as much. When half way up the stairs, you had heard a thud, and then something banging heavily, like a chair falling to the ground.

The next morning, you didn't see Rafe at the breakfast table. You saw your stepfather, who was smiling and being his relaxed self as ever. Only he avoided directly looking at you.

You saw Rafe later in the afternoon. You wanted to talk to him, say something, but you didn't know what. And when you saw the bruise under his eye, you had no words left.

Four days later you left to return to school. And when you came back during spring break, things were different, very different. Rafe no longer smiled at you, never laughed when you were around. When he didn't avoid you, he glared at you. And there was something so dark in his blue eyes that it made you shudder and sob at night.

“But you have to come!” Sarah pushed out her lower lip and looked at you with her big brown eyes, pleadingly, practically begging you to come with you to the party that evening.

“I want to spend time with my favorite older sibling and I want you to meet my friends. Besides, what do you want to do here, huh? Your boyfriend is on a family trip in the Bahamas and you can't seriously want to spend another evening binge-watching The Summer I Turned Pretty with Wheezie. Come on! Pleaaase.” Sarah's pouting went up another level and she made actual puppy eyes.

You didn't mind spending another evening with Wheezie and listening to her endless monologs on why she would always choose Jeremiah over Conrad, over any guy really.

You sighed. “But I don't have anything to –”

“To wear?” Sarah interrupted you and grabbed your hand. “Come on, you can pick whatever you want from my closet.”

You sighed in defeat, but smiled, as you followed your stepsister into her bedroom.

You didn't end up with choosing anything from her closet, but she picked out an outfit for you. And Sarah had great taste and you didn't complain. She selected a light summer dress for you, fitting for a casual party at the beach. You liked how the fabric felt on your skin and how the cut accented your curves without revealing too much. The skirt was a bit shorter than what you'd usually wore, but it was the middle of summer and you were on the island and not in the city.

When looking at the mirror, you smiled at the young woman smiling at you. You touched the golden necklace you were wearing. A gift from Denny. When he gave it to you the other day, you were surprised. Wasn't it a bit early for such costly gifts? But he insisted on you taking it and he was so happy when he put it around your neck. The pendant was a green stone, it was a bit heavy, but it looked nice. You really appreciated the gesture. And you really appreciated how your boyfriend treated you. He was okay with taking things slow. He never pushed you and in these past weeks, you had never done more than holding hands. You hadn't even kissed again. – Something you wouldn't tell your sister, for a reason you didn't quite know yourself.

You enjoyed yourself a lot at the party. Sarah's friends were easy to get along with, especially JJ. You just met him like an hour ago and he had already made you laugh more than you had in the whole past month or even year. But talking with Pope was also nice, he knew a lot and you liked listening to him. You also liked watching how these two boys got into a playfight about something stupid. You didn't mind that Sarah left you with the pogues as she and John B wanted to spend some time alone.

“Now, c'mon. Dance with me, big-city girl,” JJ pointed at you, then bent his finger to indicate that you should follow him. You laughed and shook your head. He then tried to catch you with an imaginary lasso.

“You’d better go, before he does his full-on cowboy impression, and talking in that accent, and believe me, you don't wanna hear that. No one wants to hear that,” Pope told you, leaning closer to you, and then taking your cup, so you could go and join JJ at the bonfire.

You couldn't deny that the cheap beer you had been drinking had made you a bit tipsy and somehow loosened you up a bit. But mainly, you just felt comfortable in the presence of Sarah's friends that had quickly become your friends too. And you weren't the only ones dancing by the fire. Other people also danced to the music coming from someone's speakers.

JJ took your hand and twirled you around, made an effort at imitating some dance moves that looked very elaborated. It was fun, you felt a permanent grin on your cheeks, glowing with the heat from the nearby fire, the booze and the excitement. You felt free, not thinking about anything at all. Not even thinking about the way you moved, but you just did. You felt the music, felt the joy of being young and careless – and you suddenly felt something hard that you bumped into, while twirling around.

“Sorry,” you muttered and looked up, as two hands grabbed your arms.

And you looked into the angry face of your stepbrother.

You froze, just for a moment. Then you tried to get away, but Rafe only held you closer, like pulling you into a tight embrace, and for an instant you thought that he might want to dance with you. But he didn't.

“Hey!” JJ's voice behind you made your head spin around.

“Let her go!” The blond boy stood a couple of feet away, his hands clenched into fists. His whole body seemed tensed up and he glared at Rafe. JJ looked so different from how he had looked a minute ago. All that carelessness, all his smiles gone.

You felt Rafe tense up too, as his hands tightened their grip around your arms, making you wince in pain.

“JJ,” he said his name through clenched teeth as if it was an insult.

The two boys stared at each other, the tension between them was palpable. People had gathered around them, but you didn't actually take notice of them. You looked at JJ, tried to tell him not to do anything stupid, but his eyes were fixed on Rafe. You looked at Rafe. You gave up freeing yourself from his iron grip.

“Please,” you pleaded, unsure what else to say. Your voice too soft, too weak anyway. You felt cold all of a sudden, and very sober.

And then everything happened just so fast.

JJ must have stepped closer, because the next moment, Rafe pushed you behind his own body as he lunged forward to hit JJ. When he moved his arm back, his elbow hit you at your chin and you, no longer held by him, stumbled and fell to the sandy ground. But neither Rafe nor JJ took notice. When you looked up, you saw them throwing fists at each other. Their bodies colliding, this was another kind of dance. You were shocked to see such fierce violence, both of them seemingly fighting with the intend to end the other.

You were shaking and only now noticed that you had started to cry. You cried and yelled and pleaded them to stop.

Fortunately, some guys stepped in, pulling the fighting boys apart.

Rafe angrily shrugged off the guy who was holding him, while two others held JJ, who fiercely, but in vain fought to free himself.

“Rafe!” You screamed his name, and that made him stop, made him turn his head towards you, still sitting on the ground, tears running down your face.

Rafe's eyes were dark and the look on his face was unlike anything you had ever witnessed. You flinched as he came closer, suddenly so afraid of your own stepbrother. He frowned at your reaction, but proceeded. He grabbed your arm, made you cry out in pain, pulled you to your feet. And when you tried to get away, because every cell in your body told you to run, he caught you, wrapping his arms around you from behind, picking you up like you weighed nothing, held you in both his arms. Your feet kicking the air, your fists trying to hit him, you were screaming, but he easily carried you away. And no one stopped him.

Through teary eyes you saw JJ being held by the two guys while a third one punched his face, and yet he fought, tried to get away, looking at you, looking at Rafe, who carried you away, carried you from the beach to his car.

He opened the door and tossed you onto the passenger seat. You let out a groan, as something hit your back. As soon as Rafe let go off you, you tried to get up, get out, but Rafe pushed you back into the seat.

“Let me go! Just let me go!” Your hands tried to shove him out of the way.

He caught one of your wrists, twisted it in his grip, as he reached over you to fasten the seatbelt.

You whined and gave up fighting as you knew he was too strong and you had no chance against him at all.

“Please just let me go. Why are you like this?” You pleaded between sobs.

“Why am I like this?!” Rafe yelled at you and his hand shot forward to grasp your chin, pressing so hard, you feared he would crush your jaw.

“You acting like a goddamn slut messing around with a fucking pogue!”

You flinched at each word he yelled at you, his face closer and closer. His eyes so wild, his whole expression just fuming with rage, directed at you.

“I did not,” you tried to defend yourself.

“You're a fucking LIAR!”

You flinched, and when you closed your eyes, a stream of tears ran down your cheeks.

“No,” you tried again, but he cut you short.

“You think I'm stupid?” He tilted his head, frowning, his eyes small as he glared at you in disbelief. “You think I don't know what's going on? You fucking that pogue. You’re a whore. Just like Sarah. All my sisters are goddamn sluts fucking those filthy pogues. And what does that make me look like, huh? Thought about that? Thought about what it means for your family? Your free-spirited fucking lifestyle? How does that look on dad, huh? Have you ever thought about anyone but yourself? Ever thought about the consequences of what you're doing?”

You gazed at him, taken aback by his accusations, not understanding what had gotten into him.

His eyes moved down from your face to your chest, which rose and fell under your agitated breathing.

His hand slowly let go of your chin, moved down your neck. You held your breath as you felt the pressure on your throat. His tongue flicked out, wetting his lips. His hand moved down further, his palm pressing hard onto the necklace’s pendant. You winced as you felt the hard stone digging into your skin.

“My own sister. Dressed like a whore. Fucking a pogue.” His voice was now calmer, darker, and it made you shiver.

“But, Rafe,” you sobbed, your hands tentatively reaching for his arm. “I did not do anything, I swear.”

The back of his hand hit your cheek so hard, your head flew to the side and it hit the headrest of the driver's seat.

You stared at him in shock, eyes widened, lips parted, pressing your hand to your throbbing cheek.

You couldn't believe what just happened.

But instead of apologizing or saying anything that would explain what he just did, Rafe just kept looking at you, his eyes on your trembling body. You noticed only now that your dress had slipped up, revealing a bit of your underwear. You quickly reached down to pull the fabric to cover as much of your legs as possible.

You looked up as you heard him scoff.

Shaking his head, moving his lips as if talking, talking to himself, he pushed himself back from the door, slammed it shut and walked around the car to get into the driver's seat.

You shifted as far away from him as you could, pressing your shoulder against the window, but you did not try to get out. You did not try to stop him when he started the engine. You did not yell or scream or rage. You just sat there, quietly sobbing as he drove you back to Tannyhill.

And Rafe didn't say anything, didn't even look at you when he parked the car in the driveway. He didn't look back when he got into the house, just left the front door open after he went inside.

You followed, slowly, your body still shaking with sobs. Your face hurt. The throbbing had become a sharp pain by now.

You got inside the house, it was dark, your parents and your little sister fast asleep.

You waited at the top of the stairs, until you heard the door of Rafe's bedroom shut, then you ran into your own room, locked the door behind you and crawled under the covers of your bed.

You didn't tell anyone what had happened that night with Rafe in the car.

Of course, Sarah knew about the fight between Rafe and JJ, and the day after she asked you, if you were okay. She even asked you if she should come over. But you said, you were okay and she should stay at John B's, you might come over later too. Sarah liked that idea, she was totally excited about it. You were talking over the phone, no video, so you didn't have to fake a smile. But you liked just listening when she talked with you about John B and the pogues. Their treasure hunting, their fishing trips, how she was learning to surf. It was nice to hear that your stepsister was so happy. It made you forget your own situation for a while.

Truth was, you weren't quite sure what that situation was.

The next days you tried your best to avoid your stepbrother, which wasn't too hard. He seemed to be out or asleep most of the time. So you were able to spend some time with Wheezie, preferably outside the house, somewhere you'd know you wouldn't accidentally run into Rafe, like that ice-cream parlor or the waffle house that sold these literally gigantic waffles with pink marshmallows. You even went to the mainland to a funfair with your little stepsister. Wheezie didn't notice the bruises on your face. You did quite a good job covering them up with your make up.

Since your boyfriend was still away with his family, you spent the nights either watching movies with Wheezie, helping her make tiktoks, or just in your room, reading a book.

You closed the book you had been reading for the past hours. Yawning, you looked at your phone. It was almost 3 a.m. You needed to use the bathroom. You sat on the edge of the bed, hesitating. Usually you would go down the corridor to get to the bathroom Sarah and Wheezie were sharing. But it was the middle of the night and you didn't want Wheezie to wake up. Besides, Rafe hadn't come home that night, so he wouldn't hear you.

You left your room and went to the bathroom. Pushing open the unlocked door, you stepped inside and froze. The light was on and you should have taken your time and listened when you had been outside. The water of the rain shower was running. And Rafe was standing under the shower. His back to you. The water raining down on his body, his naked body. The open shower offered you a complete view. His hair was wet, sticking to his head. Drops of water gracing his broad shoulders. Trails of water running down his back, accentuating the contours of his well-defined muscles. Water running down his lower back, over the curves of his butt, down his legs. He shifted slightly, his legs parting just a bit. Your eyes darted up, and you saw how he turned his head, turned it towards you. And looked at you. Water drops caught in his lashes, as he gazed at you. And his body moved and he was about to turn around completely, when you finally woke up from your frozen state and swiftly turned around and left the bathroom as fast as you could.

When you were inside your room, you were shaking. Your back pressed against the back of your door. You were panting, so loudly, it was embarrassing. You covered your mouth with both your hands. Your legs felt weak, like they would give in, but at the same time you felt something else, a very different, very unknown sensation. Something that had started as a tickling sensation and was now a throbbing, between your legs. You pressed them as closely together as you could. But it wouldn't stop. All your previous sleepiness gone, it seemed like all your senses were fully awake and heightened.

You heard a door open and close. You tried to focus and listen, between the sounds of your own rapid heartbeat. You heard footsteps on the corridor. Slow and heavy. They came closer and stopped. In front of your door. Right behind you. You pressed the palm of one of your hands against the wood. And you stopped breathing. Your mind racing. Trying to remember if you had locked your door.

It was still, completely still apart from your own heavy breathing, muffled by your own hand.

Then you heard footsteps again and another door, open and close.

And you still couldn't move.

When you finally made it to your bed, after checking if you indeed had locked your door, you didn't find real sleep for the rest of the night. Again and again you woke up, hearing the dripping sound of water or raspy breathing close to your ear.

You must have fallen asleep at some point, because when you opened your eyes next, the sun was shining right into your face and it was almost noon. You groaned as you turned in your bed. It was unusual for you to get up this late. You got dressed, wearing a sweater and your jeans shorts. It was most probably too hot outside for wearing a sweater, but with the air conditioning working, it was a bit chilly inside.

You went to the kitchen to get some coffee and something to eat to finally start the day. On your way downstairs, you heard Wheezie's and your mother's voice from another room. You figured that at this time of the day, the kitchen would be empty. Except it wasn't.

You stopped in the doorway when you saw Rafe. His back turned towards you, wearing a loose t-shirt and grey sweatpants, Rafe was standing at the coffeemaker.

Involuntarily, you let out a gasp, which he must have heard, because his head turned around. His eyes met yours. Just for a brief moment, then he turned his attention back to the machine in front of him. He didn't say anything, but you could have sworn that you saw a tiny smirk curling up the corners of his lips.

You took a deep breath. Something inside you told you to just go and run upstairs, lock yourself in your room. But your feet started moving and you walked to the fridge. It didn't seem as if Rafe even cared that you were in the same room with him. So you supposed that he had resumed his usual stance of just ignoring you. Besides, you still heard your sister's voice from the living room close by. Even Rafe wouldn't dare to do anything with his family, with his little sister so close by.

You went about grabbing something to eat and making yourself a coffee, while Rafe was doing the same quietly. You didn't look at him, just heard him move about and saw his frame from the corner of your eyes.

Your hands rested on the edge of the counter, fingers curling, your weight shifted to one foot, the other foot rubbed over your calf, feeling the warm woolen fabric of the sock, you were deeply in thought, while waiting for the coffeemaker to finish the program for your cappuccino.

“You're done with the staring?”

That dark voice directly behind you made you flinch and you lost your balance, tipping to the side, you almost fell – if it hadn't been for a strong hand catching you. And even when you were standing securely on both feet again, that hand didn't let go off your waist.

You felt your chest widen with the deep breath you took.

Rafe's body was so close to yours, you could feel the heat radiating from it. You could feel his muscles move as he leaned down to you, his chest pressing against your back.

“So, did you like what you saw? Last night? You left in such a rush. What were you doing in your room? Lying in your bed, thinking about my cock, touching yourself?” His lips grazed your ear as he whispered those words that made you involuntarily shiver, despite the heat you felt under your sweater.

You turned your head to look at him, when you felt something poking at your back.

Your lips parted and you felt them quiver as his face moved closer. His breath caressing your face, his eyes holding yours as his lips hovered over your mouth. Your breathing hitched as you felt his other hand move up to reach for your face.

“Finally you're up!” Wheezie's voice made you gasp. You felt pure heat rushing to your head.

Rafe’s hand – a second ago almost brushing your cheekbone – reached up to the cupboard above your head, taking out a glass. He walked to the fridge to take out the orange juice and pour some into the glass.

You grabbed the mug from under the coffeemaker, turned around and lifted it to your lips even though the contents were still too hot to drink. Your sleeves covered your wrists and you held the mug with both your hands, holding onto it like a lifeline. You nodded at Wheezie and tried to offer her a smile while your whole body was trembling.

Rafe had downed the orange juice and was pouring himself another glass, when Wheezie came over, snatched that newly filled glass from his hands and turned towards you while taking a sip.

“I needed your help with that tiktok,” she said and her accusing tone made you feel guilty, even though you couldn't remember having promised her to help her.

“I'm sorry,” you muttered. “We can do it now?” You offered.

Wheezie exhaled dramatically.

“Now is too late. We're about to leave.” Wheezie looked at you with her dark eyes, pouting. “But you could come and we can make it on the ferry,” she asked sweetly all of a sudden and took another sip from the orange juice.

Rafe, obviously having decided that he was still thirsty, had stepped closer and took out another glass from the kitchen cupboard above your head. His arm brushing your hair as he did so. And you felt goosebumps crawling over your skin, spreading on your neck.

Your eyes darted up and you noticed that Rafe's eyes traveled to your neck, and that look felt more intense than any touch and caused another shiver.

“You cold? Are you sick? Is that why you slept in?” Wheezie sounded seriously concerned now.

That shiver must have been visible. You cursed your own body for reacting so intensely and so weirdly to your stepbrother's presence.

“No, no, don't worry, Wheezie. I'm fine. I just spent the whole night reading.”

You heard a scoff coming from Rafe, but didn't look.

“Oh, that book with the dragons? You need to tell me all about it!”

“I will,” you smiled, and it was a real smile. You loved your little sister's enthusiasm.

“But not today. Denny is coming back from his family trip and we're meeting this afternoon.”

Wheezie's lips formed a disappointed ‘O', but then she nodded and took more sips from her glass.

“You're spending a lot of time with that boy lately,” Ward had entered the kitchen, and he offered you a warm smile. “You should invite him over for dinner, so we can officially meet.”

“Oh, my god, dad. You sound like a total patriarch,” Wheezie rolled her eyes.

“I do? Now the patriarch tells you to get in the car, Wheezie, we're already late,” Ward tilted his head and looked at his youngest daughter with warmth in his eyes.

Wheezie rolled her eyes again, muttered an annoyed “Fine,” put her glass down on the counter next to you, hugged you as if she was about to leave for months. When she let go, she turned towards her brother standing by the fridge.

“Bye, Rafe. Thanks for the juice,” she said, twirled around and literally danced out of the kitchen, as Rafe mumbled his reply.

You noticed how his stance had changed completely, his shoulders were drawn up, he was looking down. He seemed more tense ever since his father had come into the kitchen.

“If you don't find it too patriarchy of me, I’d like to get to know the boy that my daughter spends so much time with.”

“No, of course, that would be nice. I’ll ask him,” you quickly replied and smiled at your stepfather. You couldn't deny it, it always made you feel sort of happy when Ward casually called you his daughter, making no difference between you and his biological daughters.

“Now that's settled then,” he said. “Enjoy your date.”

“Thanks,” you took a sip from your cappuccino, which was now cool enough to drink.

Ward gave you another smile, before turning his attention toward his son.

“I asked you to drop off the crates at the site by 2.”

“I – I will. I'm on it,” Rafe gazed at his father who frowned at him.

“That's what you always say.”

“But I will.”

“It's a simple task, Rafe. If you can't even do that –“

“No, I said I will!” Rafe straightened up, took a step closer to his father, his body tensing up, you noticed.

“Honey? We need to get going,” your mother looked through the kitchen door.

“You have a nice day with Denny, sweetheart,” she addressed you, before just frowning at Rafe and leaving.

Before Ward also left, he smiled at you again – this time, the smile was a bit strained, you noticed.

He shot a less than friendly look at his son.

“For a change, just don't disappoint me again.”

When your parents had left, you remained in the kitchen and there was a strange silence.

You looked at Rafe, he was biting his nails.

“You okay?” Your voice soft, full of real concern.

He turned his face towards you, glared at you.

“Shut up!” You flinched as he yelled at you and then stormed out of the kitchen.

You let out a shaky breath after he had left. You weren't hungry anymore, so you just emptied the remains of your cappuccino into the sink and went upstairs.

Wrapped in a towel after taking a long hot shower in your sisters' bathroom, you returned to your room, only to find Rafe standing at your bed, looking at the clothes you had picked out to wear.

He held up the top you had put on the bed.

“You gonna wear that to your date?” He tilted his head, looking at you, his eyes slightly narrowed.

“Give that back,” you tried to snatch it from his hand, but Rafe's reflexes were better and he held it up, out of reach. Still you tried to get a hold of it, reaching up with one arm, while you held the towel close to your chest with your other hand, feeling it loosen from the quick movement.

Rafe looked down at you, just with his eyes, and there was a glint in them, and the corners of his mouth curled up into a smirk.

You frowned and held both your arms now in front of your chest, clutching the towel.

The tip of his tongue flicked out and wetted his lips. As if it was some reflex, you bit your own lips, and he chuckled in response. You only now realized that his body was so close to yours that you felt that vibration in your own body.

“You want to seduce him? Want him to fuck you?”

“Why are you so –” You looked up at his face and tried to step back when you felt the edge of the bed hitting the back of your legs and stopping your movement.

“So what?” He bowed his head down and his piercing blue eyes stared at you.

“Mean,” you said.

“You like it, don't you?” He tilted his head to the side and that grin on his lips changed.

“No,” you said quickly and as firmly as you managed to.

“No what?” He mocked you.

You looked at him, your brows furrowed. Still holding the towel with both hands, you tried to push at his chest with your elbow to get some distance between you two.

“I like you better when you're not mean,” you said, no longer looking up, but your eyes on his chest that you were trying to push away.

“That so?” His voice was lower than before and you lifted your gaze to see his eyebrows raised. “Like when?”

“Like when you were nice.”

"What is nice, hm?”

You felt a heat crawling under your skin and lowered your gaze.

His fingers under your chin tilted up your head, made you look at him again. His thumb brushed along your bottom lip.

“This nice?” His voice a raspy whisper.

The sudden softness of his touch made you shiver.

Your lips parted and you drew in a sharp breath as he leaned down.

“This?” His voice so low, you could hardly hear it, but feel it so intensely, as his lips moved close to yours. And you could taste his breath, taste the coffee and the orange juice and him.

You held your breath and his lips grazed the corner of your mouth. You closed your eyes. Exhaling through your mouth, you felt that trembling growing. Your legs suddenly unsteady. But you didn't fall. His arm wrapped around you and held you close to his body as he slowly lowered you on the bed.

His lips were so incredibly soft as they covered your face with tender kisses. His body was hovering over yours as you lay on your back. You felt its warmth, but not its weight.

His hand touched your face, his long fingers caressed your neck, brushed over your shoulders, leaving a trail of goosebumps on your heated skin. His mouth traveled over your cheekbone to your ear. His breath made you gasp and whimper as the tip of his nose touched that spot you didn't know was so sensitive. Slowly and without any resistance from you, he uncurled your fingers that were wrapped around the towel. He guided one of your hands to his shoulder, and your fingers, like they had their own will, grasped at it, held onto him, as your body arched and a moan escaped your lips when his mouth found the sensitive skin on your neck. His big hand cupped your now exposed breast, kneading it, fumbling it, no longer touching softly. His knee pushed between your legs, parting them. And you felt the pressure at your core as your hips rose to meet him.

Your breathing, slow and loud, was all that could be heard in the room. And then the soft sucking sounds of his lips on your neck, leaving a mark.

Both your hands were on him now. The one hand at his shoulder, grabbing so hard, it was shaking. Your other hand touching his back. The lightest pull from you and he rocked his hips against yours, making you gasp and open your eyes in surprise as you felt his hard length urging against your thigh. Being completely inexperienced, you couldn't quite judge whether it was normal that it was so huge. And your mind was cloudy with all those unknown sensations that you were unable to tell whether this was right when you felt his fingers rub along your folds, when they parted them and pushed inside you.

You tensed up, cried out, as you clenched around the intruding digit. Your hands no longer pulling Rafe closer but trying to push him up, like pushing at an unmovable rock.

You whined as his finger pushed deeper, your face turning to the side, away from him as a tear ran down your cheek. He let out a hissing sound, his mouth close to your neck. His finger remained inside of you but stopped moving further. You already felt so incredibly full. His lips started moving over your skin. He kissed your chin, kissed your cheek, licked at your tears.

“No,” your voice a hoarse whisper, your hand balled into a fist, pressing at his shoulder uselessly, in vain trying to push him off you.

“No,” you said again and that word turned into a moan as you felt something pressing against your most sensitive spot. His thumb rubbed your pearl and your traitorous body reacted by shivering. And your legs parted further. He moved them up, made them bent, giving him room. His finger curled inside you. Your body convulsed. You opened your eyes, but you couldn't see anything clear. You felt your body heating up, sweat covering it. Your hands clutching at Rafe's shirt as you made those noises that didn't sound like coming from you. But they came from you. From something deep inside you. Something Rafe had just started to awake. You bit your lips to make those sounds stop as you felt that throbbing at your core with Rafe's fingers caressing, pushing, rubbing, pinching, curling, thrusting.

His other hand gripped your chin, turned your head and you looked up at him, just for a second, before his lips met yours and he claimed your mouth in a kiss that was nothing like the one you remembered from all those years ago, that tender kiss. This kiss was hungry and fierce, and intoxicating. Your mouth opened for his tongue. He claimed it. And when it pushed inside you, it felt like it was your own hunger. You felt like you were starving as he was devouring you.

Wide-eyed, your face burning with heat, your body aching with an unknown need, you gazed up at him when he broke the kiss, lifting his body, no longer touching you. But you still felt him, felt him on you, felt him inside of you, tasted him in your mouth. He had let go off you for a moment to take off his shirt and his sweatpants.

He was completely naked when he hovered above you, resting on his hands pressed into mattress on either side of you. The muscles in his arms tense and hard. Everything about him was hard. Solid like a rock. He was kneeling between your legs. Your body shaking, shivering as if you were cold when you felt that sweat covering it and that wetness between your legs. You were so much the opposite of him, in every way. You felt it so much at that moment when he just looked down at you. Something in his eyes so harsh that it made you shudder and close your eyes. You shook your head and stopped when his hand touched your face and held it. You opened your eyes. His face only inches away from yours.

“I'm gonna be gentle, alright? I'm gonna be nice.” His lips brushed yours in a tender kiss and your body arched up, despite your hands being balled up into fists and your arms pressed close to your chest as if you were trying to shield yourself.

You felt a movement, felt the bed tilt. And when you opened your eyes, you saw him kneeling in front of you, touching his hard cock, pumping it.

You gasped at the sight. It was even bigger than you had thought from what you had felt earlier. It was too big.

“Just the tip, alright? I won't push it all in. I know you're too delicate,” he said as if he had read your mind – or just saw the fear in your eyes.

He leaned down to kiss you and whisper at your lips.

“Just the tip, I promise. You will like it.”

As if proving his point, your hips moved up on their own and a hot shiver made you moan as his fingers touched your needy core. A smile appeared on his face, not quite a smirk, but you weren't sure anymore what you saw, what you felt, what you wanted. All reason was clouded and still, you knew that this was wrong.

You closed your eyes as he lifted one of your legs.

“Look at me,” his voice dark and so low, you felt a tingling at the back of your neck.

You obeyed and opened your eyes. Your arms were still pressed against your heaving chest, but it was easy for him to move them and place your hands on his shoulders as he lowered himself onto you.

“Look at me,” he said again and your eyes were fixed on his face, watching his features, seeing that little smile, that glint in his eyes, seeing his mouth open, and his face contort the moment his tip parted your folds. At first it felt slick and smooth and then suddenly so painfully rough. The thick tip was stretching you unbearably wide. Your legs automatically pressed against his body, desperately trying to close and shut out the intruder. He pushed them apart and you screamed, screamed out loud at the top of your lungs as he pushed inside you. Too deep, too hard, too rough, too fast.

Waves and waves of stinging pain rushing threw your body, making it convulse and shake, making you whimper and whine, you felt like you were being torn apart. You pushed at his shoulders, pressed at his chest, but his hips kept moving, rocking hard against you. Urging his hard length into you.

“So good,” he muttered between strained breaths. “So tight,” he panted. “All mine,” he growled.

His movements so rough and relentless, he seemed lost in his own pleasure. His eyes fixed on you, but not really seeing you, he seemed like he had forgotten all about you, your part in this, your existence.

“Rafe!” You screamed his name, screamed it at his face, screamed it so loud, your throat hurt.

His eyes flickered and he looked at you, really looked at you. And something changed in his features. For the briefest of moments, he paused, leaned down to kiss your lips, whispering something you didn't understand. And then you felt his fingertip touching that spot his thumb had teased before. Only now it wasn't teasing any longer. You didn't know how or why he knew exactly what to do, but that touch, that movement with his fingertip was all your body needed, all it craved for that moment. Your mouth opened wide as you moaned, then just gasped. The back of your head pressing into the mattress, your eyes rolling back. Your fingernails digging into Rafe's tense muscles at his back, as you were pulling him closer, ever closer, when that pain all of a sudden turned into pleasure, a painful, hot pleasure that left you in a state of rapture. Your body bending, trembling, shaking, as Rafe fucked you through your first ever orgasm.

You heard him groan, an animalistic sound. You felt your walls tensing up in waves and clenching so hard around him, making his thrusts only more ruthless, more forceful, as he took you, took all of you. And as the rush of your fierce high faded, you felt him so intensely. Felt him pushing inside you, filling you, feeling you, breathing on you, touching you, holding you, kissing you – it was like he was melting into you, when all of a sudden he stopped his movements, gazed down at you with hazy eyes, his features tensing up for a moment, and the next, the absolute opposite: all soft and lovingly, so sweet. He lowered his body onto yours and you felt his heavy panting syncing with yours. He kissed your face, breathless. Kissed your lips and after pushing into you a few more times, he pulled out and rolled his body off yours.

You kept lying on your back, next to him. Your legs still apart, knees bent. And you felt the cool breeze from the air-conditioning on your heated body, covered in a film of sweat, yours and his. And between your legs, you felt another kind of throbbing. And something sticky dripping out of you. You shut your legs and winced, rolling on your side, you turned away from him. It was as if reality hit you hard, and despite the fact that you still hadn't composed your breathing, despite the fact that your body wanted to remain in that blissful state, you felt a sudden wave of shame and guilt and something else that hurt even more, even deeper than the burning pain at your core.

At the touch of his hand, you flinched. You didn't want to, but your body curled up and you moved away from him, when in fact, you wanted nothing more than for him to hold you, to tell you that it was alright. That everything was exactly how it should be. That you were safe. With him.

Instead, you felt the bed tilt and you heard him get up and put on his clothes.

You moved your head so you could look up at him, look at him through teary eyes.

He stood in front of the bed, looking down at you. For a moment he seemed to hesitate, as if he wanted to lie down again. Then his features hardened. A frown appeared on his brow. His hands balled into fists, his jaws clenched.

“Now you can lie about that too. When your boyfriend fucks you tonight, you can lie and say it is you first time.” His voice so cold, so hard, it took the air out of your lungs.

And you only exhaled when he had left your room and the door shut behind him and you cried and sobbed and wept.

a/n: this was kinda intense. Much darker than my recent fics. And so long. But I didn't want to rush it. I needed to write it as it is. I still hope you liked reading it. Reblogs, comments and likes are very much appreciated. btw, it's my birthday today.

xx

[strangersteddierthings]

Sequel to Good People - The fic in wherein Wayne doesn't like Steve and overheard a conversation he shouldn't have. Here's the aftermath of that :3

Part One🦇Part Two🦇Final Part

-

Wayne had stayed in his bedroom long after he heard the boys leave. Eddie had knocked on his door to let him know he'd be staying at Steve's and to not expect him back until late tomorrow, a courtesy he'd never shown until after he'd been the victim of a manhunt back in spring. Wayne never asked him to do that but he thinks Eddie picked up on how worried Wayne would get if he were gone for any amount of time.

Eddie's always been good at reading people when he bothers to pay attention to them. Maybe that should have been enough reason for him to give pause to his dislike of the Harrington boy, instead of needing to overhear the boy crying about how he thinks there's something rotten deep within him that only Wayne can sense.

He'd been so sure he knew what kind of person Steve Harrington was. Eddie had been hung up on boys just like him pert-near his whole life, Wayne thinks, and it's never ended differently.

It's a Tuesday night and his friends usually gather at the bar on Friday nights, but Wayne needs to get out of the trailer to think. A beer might help. So, he grabs his keys and heads out.

He's been a regular at this bar since before he was even old enough to drink. Used to come with his pa, may he rest in peace, just to get out of the house. He's been a patron longer than any of the staff have worked there, he realizes.

"Hello Linda," Wayne greets as he takes a seat at the bar instead of at his usual table. He'd done a cursory glace when he came in and confirmed none of his drinking buddies were in before choosing the bar.

"This isn't your usual day," Linda says, leaning a hip on the counter, "but it's always a pleasure to see you."

"I got some thinkin' to do," Wayne replies and Linda nods and moves away, returning soon with a bottle of his usual beer. She picks up the bottle open and removes the cap before setting the drink down in front of him.

"Need a sounding board, hun?" She asks.

Wayne does a quick survey of the bar again but it's pretty quiet so he returns his gave to Linda and says, "if you wouldn't mind too much hearin' about how an old man might have messed up."

Linda laughs. "You aren't even half a decade older than me, so you best not be sprouting that 'old man' nonsense around me, 'cause I am not some old lady."

"Terribly sorry, Linda. I'm just really feelin' like an old fool."

A small frown comes to Linda's face then. "Now what could you have possibly done?"

"Well, I guess I'm tryin' to figure out if I did mess up. Eddie's got a friend and I don't trust 'im. Thought I had good reason not to, but, well, I overheard somethin' I wasn't supposed ta and now I'm not sure."

Linda hums, "hmm, that doesn't sound like you, judging someone unrightly. You are usually a good read about people."

"I'll admit, I haven't bothered to spend enough time with the boy to, uhh, judge him."

"Wayne Munson," Linda scolds, "you best not be telling me you judged that boy because of other people."

Judging by Linda's raising brow line, he thinks his guilt must be clear on his face. "You know Eddie, and how people have treated him. And with what he just went through- I just want 'im safe. Sure, his new friend graduated last year, but he was on the basketball team his whole career. And I'm jus' supposed ta believe this one boy didn't side with the group who started the manhunt?"

"Unless you've got evidence otherwise, yes," Linda says, brows furrowed.

Wayne sighs. "I ain't got proof. I got a lot of people sayin' he's good, actually. But it's the Harrington boy. The same boy Eddie would come home and complain 'bout. Harrington, Hagan, Hargrove, though I shouldn't speak ill of the dead. All them boys treatin' Eddie like he wasn't worth nothin' until they wanted somethin' form him."

Linda's mouth is almost a perfectly straight line with how much she's pursed her lips the more he talks, but she doesn't interrupt and no customer calls for her, so he continues.

"And you know what Richard Harrington was like. I know y'all only shared one school year together, but Janice wasn't any better, and she was your year, wasn't she?" Linda gives him one nod in response. "That boy's a product of them. I- You can't fault me for thinkin' differently."

"So, when do you expect Eddie to end up in prison?"

The question throws Wayne and fills him with anger at the same time. "Now, Linda, I ain't likin' what you are implyin'."

"I ain't implyin' nothing," she says, using the same tone with him that he did with her. "I'm applying your logic. Eddie's a product of his parents, ain't he? Al's in prison, and his mama's long gone, bless her soul. And since Eddie ain't sick, last I heard, he must be following after his daddy."

The anger leaves him then, and all he's left with is shame. "Point made. And if I'm bein' fully honest with ya, I don't even need ya to defend that boy. That thing I overheard. That what's eatin' at me. He called me good people."

Linda softens, shoulders dropping, "you are good people, hun."

"That boy told my Eddie that I'm 'good people', and that his parents are bad ones, and I. I don't know what to do about that."

"He thinks his own parents are bad?"

Wayne nods, "is what he said. Thinks I can somehow sense he's also rotten just by association."

"There's nothing to it, then," Linda says, like they've already talked out the tangled mess that is Wayne's thoughts on Steve Harrington and have reached a conclusion. Well, perhaps Linda already has. She's always been bright, and she's usually right. "You, Wayne Robert Munson, need to apologize to that boy. The guilt and shame's gonna put you into your cups otherwise."

Wayne nods slowly, though he isn't even sure if he agrees or is just acknowledging what she said before he takes a long pull from his bottle before lowering both his arms to rest on the counter as he replies, "You're right as usual, Linda my dear. I just gotta let go of the fact he's Richard Harrington's son and try and see just Steve."

"Damn right. Eddie might be Al's by birth, but you raised him and he turned out alright. Maybe Steve got the same treatment. Had his own Wayne around to raise him right."

There might be a bit of truth to that. He's heard enough talk about Steve Harrington over the years to think that. One of his drinking buddies used to be Jim Hopper. He's heard about the amount of parties he'd had to go shut down at the Harrington's house, with no parents to be seen. (Always Jim's biggest gripe back then. "Where's this kids goddamn parents!?) Wayne always assumed their kid just took advantage every time his parents were gone, but maybe it's the opposite. Maybe they were always gone, and Steve had parties to not be alone in his house.

Linda's right. There is nothing to it. He needs to talk to Steve, properly apologize, and go from there.

"It ain't an easy thing, admittin' you might be wrong," Wayne sighs.

Linda reaches across the counter and places a hand on Wayne's arm just below his wrist. Wayne looks up from where he'd ended up staring at his bottle, making eye contact with her. "If your boy is friends with this boy, it's for a reason. Just give him a chance. You are one of the good ones, but even we can have a lapse in judgment now and then. Doesn't make you bad, makes you human."

"Ain't no one perfect but the good Lord," Wayne says and Linda nods in agreement.

"Alright. I'll leave you to your beer and your thoughts for now, but you best keep me updated on your situation. I wanna know how it goes," Linda retracts her hand and heads down the counter to check on the few other people sitting about nursing drinks.

Wayne sits in his thoughts more than he drinks, so by the time he's done with the beer it's warm but that's fine. He will talk to the Harrington kid, but he wants to talk to Eddie first. He owes his nephew that much, and he does recall Eddie saying something to the effect of 'he'll come around' to Steve, and Wayne wants to tell Eddie he'll try.

Also he doesn't want to just corner the boy after he's been somewhat intimidating intentionally. He's going to get Eddie to ask if Steve'll talk to him.

True to his word, Eddie returns home late the next day. The clock says it's almost 6 when Eddie finally comes through the front door. If he's surprised to see Wayne awake, he doesn't show it. He does work the graveyard shift, and he's got a shift at 10 tonight, usually wakes up two hours before his shift. He'd wanted to make sure he caught Eddie, though, so he's been up since three.

"Eddie, you got a minute?" Wayne says.

"Sure. What's up?" Eddie says as he pulls off his jacket, depositing it on the nearest surface before plopping sideways on the couch so he's facing Wayne.

"I gotta come clean. I overheard some of what you and Steve were talkin' about," Wayne says, because he's a man of his word and he's always been good at doing the hard thing if it also turns out to be the right thing. He's got to be honest with Eddie, so he can be honest with himself. "Heard Harr- Steve talkin' 'bout how he thinks I'm a good person, and his parents aren't."

Eddie's quiet for a moment, blinking owlishly back at him while he thinks. "Oh. Umm. Sorry. I just- I think this is the first time I've heard you say Steve's name."

"Not the part I thought you'd focus on," Wayne huffs a laugh, "but I owe your boy an apology and I was hopin' you could help me make it happen."

"My boy- what is happening," Eddie drops his voice to whisper the question to himself.

"What's happening is I'm doin' the thing I always told you ta do. Taking accountability and fixin' my mistake."

"Oh. Oh!" Eddie narrows his eyes at Wayne, "you've made an ass out of me. All those times I assured Steve you were just being standoffish and you were- what were you doing?"

"Intentionally keepin' the boy at a distance 'cause I thought he was gonna hurt you. I sure as hell ain't been friendly. I been judging him because I knew his parents, thinkin' about how an apple don't fall far from the tree," Wayne stops, giving pause to see if Eddie will speak but he isn't. He's just staring at Wayne like he's a puzzle. "It was brought to my attention that it's mighty unfair to judge someone 'cause of how their parents act."

Eddie's brow furrows and his lips purse. It makes him think of Linda. She'd made the exact same face. "I- Jesus fuck this is weird, but I. I think I'm mad at you. Disappointed."

Eddie doesn't say it with an angry tone, and his face still looks more puzzled than mad, but the sentence feels like a kick to the chest anyway. Eddie and he have never been mad at each other, not in the eight years Eddie's lived here with him. They've been worried and scared for each other that, or mad at someone or something else that they take out on each other, but never mad at each other.

"You've every right to be."

Eddie stands from the couch, paces down the hallway, and Wayne thinks this might be the end of any conversation tonight, but instead Eddie comes storming back up the hall. "So, what, did you take me in expecting me to be my dad!?"

"No. He mighta contributed to your birth, but we both know that man ain't nurtured you a day in his life."

"Yeah, well, Steve's parents didn't raise him either, so all this has been bullshit! You made Steve think he's, he's broken and a bad person! And," Eddie's eyes are wet and he's angry but also about to cry. Wayne hasn't seen him like this in a long time. Not since the day they learned Al was in prison, fifteen years with a chance for parole if he's on his best behavior. Eddie had been so angry, and sad, and hurt by the news. Eddie's like that now, worked up so much he's repeating himself as he hiccups his words out around the lump in this throat, "And, and you made me help him feel that way! Because I didn't take him serious when he said, said you didn't like him! I thought you were being, being a dad, all fake gruff to intimidate the guy I like but it's- you were- FUCK!"

Wayne lets him yell. He deserves it, and Eddie needs it. Eddie's not saying anything untrue. He takes in what Eddie is yelling at him; Steve's parents didn't raise him, and how Wayne's cold shoulder must have added to whatever else Steve has going on in his life.

"I, I h-held him while he b-bawled into my shirt last night! He, he thinks- and you, you didn't even trust me! T-trust my own j-judgment of, of Steve! I, I need- I can't-" Eddie doesn't finish the sentence. He turns on his heel and storms back down the hall, the slamming of his door finalizing this conversation.

To say that Wayne feels terrible is inadequate. He's hurt his boy, and he's hurt his boy's boy, and he's got no one to blame but himself.

Now he's got two apologies to make.

I tried to tag as many people as I could remember that expressed interest in a follow up fic. I am SO sorry if I missed you. Please let me know if you want to be tagged in the final part. I will only be tagging people who ask to be tagged going forward 'cause it's a lot of people to remember and my memory is garbage.

@i-less-than-three-you @nburkhardt @afewproblems @skepsiss @unclewaynemunson @itsthestrangestthings @emofratboy @devondespresso @finntheehumaneater @loopholesinmydreams @yourmom-isgay @wrenisflying @emsgoodthinkin @messrs-weasley @madigoround @jackiemonroe5512 @gutterflower77 @zerokrox-blog @eriquin @samyuck @lunarmaruna @mugloversonly @kaij-basil-lionelli88

[angelltheninth]

reqs....are.......open? then, i humbly ask for a darling that loves sitting in laps.

if they're allowed to sit in someone's lap they're content to just sit there for hours in complete and utter bliss

any characters will work!

Back! Get back! No biting!

Pairing: Tanjiro, Zenitsu, Inosuke, Tengen x Reader

Tags: fluff, established relationship, kissing, cuddles, teasing, being flustered, playful biting

A/N: A little Demon Slayer cause I just got another request for them too.

Tanjiro waits for you to get comfortable before wrapping both of his arms around you and sighing contently against your neck. Between his constant training and all the missions you have to go on he more then welcomes calm moments like this where you can relax in each other's company. Likes to nuzzle against you, he picked that up from Nezuko but don't tell her she already teases him about how affectionate he is when he's with you. He holds you extra tight against him if you were on different missions and didn't get to see each other.

Zenitsu goes as still as a board when you casually sit in his lap like it's no big deal and the best thing that's happened to him today. Slowly though he begins to lean forward to place his chin on your shoulder and ask you about your day. He likes the small talk, it helps him calm down and also keeps him from not freaking out about having you this close. Really hopes you can't hear how fast his heart is beating against his chest. His kiss against your cheek is lightning fast, you barely feel it but you hear his little yelp when you whisper you'd like another one.

Inosuke grabs hold of you as soon as you sit down in his lap. Now you're trapped and you're not going anywhere! That was your plan? Oh. Well he thought of it first, so he wins either way. He's not the type to sit still doing nothing for long so he's not gonna leave you alone when he has you this close to him. Your neck is gonna look like it's been attacked when he's done with it, many bite marks running from one side to the other, then covered by licks and kisses as you squirm in his lap. If you didn't want to get teased you really shouldn't have sat down.

Tengen grins against your neck as he places his hands on your thighs and begins to slowly kiss your neck. He's not wanting to start anything, he's only looking to help you relax a bit better and he knows his kisses always do the trick. But if you turn your head and get one on the lips he might turn this into something more then relaxing, that's all up to you though, he's happy to spend some one-on-one time with you doing nothing but cuddling and exchanging slow, passionate kisses.

[runnning-outof-time]

I’m (Not) Alright with a Slow Burn | Tommy Shelby x Reader headcanons

Request: yes by anonymous

Pairing: Tommy Shelby x Reader (headcanons)

Summary: How Tommy would go about being stuck in a slow burn with someone he's falling for.

Warnings: mention of death of grandmother, slight season 2 spoilers

Word Count: 2537

A/N: I really enjoyed this request! umm…I’m not sure if these are 100% written like headcanons - I wrote them like I was spewing out ideas lol. Kacey Musgraves’s song Slow Burn was also running through my head while I was writing this, hence the title. Also how the hell do you actually spell headcanons?? Is there 1 ‘n’ or 2?? Lol . Enjoy! :)

I’D LOVE TO KNOW WHAT YOU THINK! - YOUR COMMENTS & REBLOGS HELP ME WRITE!

Comment/Message me if you want to be tagged!

• (Y/N) was one of the few Shelby Company Ltd. employees that Tommy didn't hire. She was brought on board while he and the boys were off at one of the races. Polly saw the potential in her and immediately welcomed her into the company.

• when Tommy returned from said races, he was pleasantly surprised to meet her.

• and Polly clocked that immediately. She was able to tell by the lack of a fight - Tommy was always able to find something to pick at when she made decisions within the company, no matter how minuscule. But there was nothing to pick at with (Y/N).

• Polly also wasn't surprised to see (Y/N) completing more and more tasks that came directly from Tommy. They'd be tasks that Polly hadn't even known about...but for some reason Tommy trusted (Y/N) with them.

• (Y/N) didn't think anything different about it. She'd been hired into the company and one of her bosses was asking her to do things. That's what was supposed to happen, right?

• although she did find it odd that it was Tommy asking her to do these things when she'd originally been hired to help Polly with sorting out the books and the like.

• things persisted like that for a few months. (Y/N) would happily and eagerly help him with whatever he needed to have done around the company. He'd look out for her, making sure that she was happy in her position and just in general. And in return, (Y/N) would (try) to keep up the same for him. She'd show that in the smallest of ways and attempts, but he would notice. Over those few months and because of those small acts, Tommy's thoughts and feelings towards (Y/N) evolved.

• he can still remember the day when that switch began - because it haunted him every day after.

• she came into his office like it was any other day for her...but it wasn't any other day for Tommy.

• he'd been working under Campbell for a few weeks at that point, and it'd become apparent that he'd be dead at the end of the arrangement. Tommy wasn't afraid to die, but the thought of getting everything in order and making sure his family could go on without him was now plaguing his mind.

• so when (Y/N) asked him what he had for her to do today, Tommy rattled off his list without as much as looking up at her. He was fully expecting her to turn and exit the second he finished speaking.

• she didn't. Silence reigned for a moment or two before "are you ok, Tommy?" came quietly from her. This made Tommy look up, and when he did, all of the noise in his mind ceased. Sure he looked at her before - he'd looked up like this thousands of times, but he never saw her like he did when he looked up this time. It was this otherworldly experience that he'd only been through twice before. Which meant he knew exactly what was happening.

• even though he brushed her question off and told her that he was fine, he hoped that things wouldn't change between them.

• and thankfully they didn't because hell, Tommy Shelby was certain that he was falling in love.

• he began testing the waters carefully at first. (Y/N) was a good woman and he wasn't about to make her leave the company due to his actions. He couldn't stand to lose her.

• so he started by making sure she was being heard; by actually listening to her whenever she'd share ideas or tell him how things played out with what he'd asked her to do.

• then he emphasized making sure that she was safe - having blinders on her block, sticking around on the days where she and Polly would be in the shop tallying the winnings, and also personally offering to take her wherever she needed to go.

• (Y/N) reacted bashfully to these offers. She felt that the other company employees would think that she was getting special treatment or something — well...she kind of was...but she deeply appreciated Tommy doing these things.

• in regards to feelings, Tommy was putting his out there as best as he could (which, well I'll let you be the one to decide on how well that is) He really tried to make a more personal connection with her; to get to know her as her and not just another employee...and in turn he let her know him.

• (Y/N) stayed professional. He was one of her bosses after all. But she couldn't deny that she enjoyed being in his presence. Her friends found that crazy, too...how can she be happy to be spending time with Tommy Shelby? She swore it off as strictly work related until she couldn't anymore.

• the evening started like any other...(Y/N) went home after work with the intention of doing what she did every other evening. But something was waiting for her at home. Something that turned her world upside-down. She found out that her grandmother had passed away. The post had come and one of the letters was from a sibling of hers, sharing the news. She didn't know what to do.

• after exhausting all of her options, she found herself at the Garrison. Tommy had invited her there in the past, but she never accepted it due to wanting to stay professional.

• she asked around for him and the second she found out that he was in the snug, she made her way to it and opened the door. He was in there, but so were his brothers. "This was the last place I could think of," she blurted out. "Everyone out," was all Tommy needed to say before it was just the two of them in the room.

• (Y/N) quickly sat and let everything out. Tommy listened intently, something no one had ever done for her in the past. They sat in the snug for hours, (Y/N) talking and Tommy listening. Her ability to share her grandmother's story helped her immensely.

• from that evening, (Y/N) saw Tommy in a different light. The fact that he sat and listened to her as she lamented to him and not once did he even think of leaving meant the world to her. No one had shown her that sort of worthiness or attention.

• all at once it felt like she was head over heels for him. Like all of those little instances he'd shown her before had all culminated into this one, major display of devotion. It had her realizing that maybe it wasn't solely because she was his employee...maybe it was much more than that.

• and so when he went out of his way and made sure to check on her the next morning - she knew this because Polly commented on the fact that he was supposed to be in London by sun-up - and he couldn't get him off of her mind no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't beat around the bush anymore...she'd fallen for Tommy Shelby, hard.

• but things didn't hit off right from that moment.

• no, it took a rather long time for those feelings to actually come out.

• there was a lot of dancing around the other - the smaller gestures and moments still occurred, but neither one was willing to make that jump over the edge and confront the other about it.

• yes, you read that right...Tommy Shelby was actually keeping his feelings for her close to the chest.

• mostly it was because of the position they were in. He'd offer to take her to dinner and she'd politely decline (even though she really wanted to go) because she was worried the other company employees would suspect something.

• Tommy wasn't exactly into the dancing around it (he hated it at times actually), but he honored her choice.

• but that doesn't mean he wasn't taking every chance he got to spend time around her. To check in on her and see how things were. To walk her home if she stayed later. Anything to show her that he was serious...without actually saying that he was serious.

• he was hooked on her though, there was no doubt about it. All he needed was for her to really show that interest back to him, and then he'd know for sure that he could act on it.

• and then Polly's birthday came.

• the company/family decided to host a party at the Garrison. Of course (Y/N) was invited.

• a man named Louis was one of the men who worked the shop floor daily. He saw (Y/N) almost every day that she was also on the floor, and he made it a point to seek her out as well.

• much like with Tommy, (Y/N) kept things between her and Louis strictly professional.

• but this party is when Louis decided that he was going to make his move...to try and woo her.

• maybe he should have thought this through...

• (Y/N) was sitting at one of the tables, chatting with some of the other women who worked within the company. It was a surprise that she wasn't with Tommy, considering he sought her out almost immediately after she arrived. But Tommy was still present though.

• Louis had this plan to put everything right on the table. He smoothly walked over to her and, equally as smoothly, slipped into the booth that she was sitting in. (Y/N) was polite, but it was obvious that she wasn't feeding any more into it than a simple, friendly conversation.

• but of course Tommy didn't pick up on that. From where he was standing it looked like Louis was a little too close to her for comfort. So he quickly intervened.

• and he was anything but subtle with it. He was quickly able to make Louis feel uneasy and clear him out.

• (Y/N)'s confused, but happy to have the man she'd hardly talked to gone. She sends Tommy an appreciative smile and that's just about enough to bring Tommy to his knees. But that doesn't happen...instead he gives her one of his signature, lop-sided smiles and nods at the ladies sitting with her before going back to where he previously was.

• this interaction didn't go unnoticed though. Polly and Ada were watching from off to the side. These two know Tommy better than anyone, and they've rarely seen him react this quickly and in this sort of way. So it's glaringly apparent to them that something's going on here.

• and this becomes increasingly apparent as time goes on.

• also as time goes on, (Y/N) manages to move up in the company. She's basically right underneath Polly in terms of power, becoming her 'right hand man’ in the treasurer position.

• having this position means that she's more involved in the inner circle and is at all of the meetings.

• the entire family swears by the fact that Tommy is softer with her than he is with anyone else.

• you can literally see the change the second she shares her thoughts on a matter or even enters a room. The switch is practically on a dime.

• but these two keep dancing around each other - they've been doing it for close to a year at this point.

• and those who know of it are baffled. They are obviously in love with each other...why hasn't one budged and made things official?

• the suspicions on this topic all come to a climax on the first year anniversary of (Y/N) joining the company.

• Tommy invites her out to dinner. (Y/N) agrees this time mostly because she knows what day it is...and she knows that the Shelbys like to celebrate such things.

• but she's surprised when she arrives at the upscale restaurant and is escorted to a table for two. Tommy can't help but smile at the face she pulls when she sees that he's sitting there, waiting for her.

• but she gets comfortable very quickly. It's Tommy we're talking about here...she's never been more comfortable with anyone in her life if she was being honest. And the same goes for him too.

• the dinner lasts hours. They talk about everything and anything. Work's off the table, but yet they still manage to not have more than a moment of silence. Both are surprised at how freely the conversation flows.

• eventually Tommy brings up the subject they've been dancing around.

• he lays everything out on the table this time. There's no sense in holding back. He tells her how she makes him feel, how she's made him feel from the moment he first saw her.

• he also mentions the fact that he's felt this way for a while now, and that he can't continue dancing around it any longer. He honored her desire to stay professional for this time, but he wants her too much, loves her too much to keep going like this for even a day longer.

• at first (Y/N)'s shocked. She's not oblivious...she'd been catching the little hints that he'd been leaving all this time, but she was truthfully too hesitant to ever bring the subject up to him.

• but now that he's put it out there, she figures why should she hold back her feelings any longer?

• so she lays it all out for him as well. Tells him how she feels about him, how she's felt about him for some time now.

• Tommy can't contain his happiness as he hears this. He's grinning like a fool.

• so really there's only one last thing for them to do now...make it official.

• Tommy wastes no time in doing that.

• he asks her properly though. That's what she deserves, especially after all this time that's been invested.

• he stops them just down the road from where she lives. He tells her that he really likes her (he won't use the 'l word' just yet - even though the two of them are so clearly in love) and that he can't wait a moment longer to make her his.

• (Y/N) quickly agrees with the sentiment after everything that had been shared during their dinner.

• Tommy can't help but smile at her response, and he just barely nods his head in his Tommy fashion before continuing to walk her home.

• they share their first kiss at the front door, and it's absolutely magical.

• they then proceed to do a terrible job of hiding it while at work. Tommy's waited this long to be with her, he's not going hide his affection for her any longer.

• their definition of 'in secret' is soooo far from the actual definition. They think that they're being sneaky, only stealing kisses in empty hallways and in Tommy's office, but it takes Polly literally only two days to catch onto it.

• no ones upset with it though. Honestly everyone’s happy that they’re finally together.

• well everyone except Louis…Louis is a little bummed about the whole thing. But Tommy and (Y/N) don’t care about that in the slightest.

Tagged: @mystcldydrms @the-anxious-youth @cloudofdisney @look-at-the-soul @elenavampire21 @mrsalwayswrite @julkaamazing @evita-shelby @notyour-valentine @shelbydelrey @theshelbyslimited @peakyswritings @just-a-blackhole @watercolorskyy @strayrockette @peakyduchesss @alexxavicry @captivatedbycillianmurphy @yummycastiel @dark-academia-slut @tommystargirl @emotionalcadaver @stevie75 @lyarr24 @signorellisantichrist @zablife @anotherblinder @cillmequick @dandelionprints @letal-y-poetica @garrison-girl-08 @insanitybyanothername @depxiety @raincoffeeandfandoms @dragons-are-my-favorite @forgottenpeakywriter @cljordan-imperium @brummiereader @red-riding-wood @everythingelseisextra @little-diable @thomashelbyswife @shaddixlife

MASTERLIST

[suuuupernovaaa]

Clean | Hobie Brown x f!Reader

You got yourself into a little bit of a fight, and Hobie has to patch you up.

Mature. 18+. Mention of blood.

The cloth meets your tender skin, and you hiss and try to pull your hand away.

"Hobie, that hurts," you say through gritted teeth. "What is on that?"

Holding your hand tightly to your chest, as if to protect it from him, you look up to see an exasperated expression on his face.

"Stuff to clean it. Give me that back." He grabs your hand a little gruffly, and puts the cloth back on. When the sting subsides, it does feel nice and cool.

"Someone out to teach you how to throw a proper punch," Hobie says, dabbing the cloth gently, moving it up your arm to where your other scrapes are. None of them are terribly deep, except a slight gash on your thigh from, you think, falling onto some broken glass.

"I know how," you reply quietly. He moves to your other arm, and you feel the stinging again. "It wasn't much punching, anyway. It was like... clawing and shoving. It was chaotic."

He gives you your hands back, and looks down at your legs, noticing the cut on your thigh. He lets a whistle out from between his teeth, and stands up. He rinses out the cloth he's been using, and grabs a new one from his kitchen drawer. He puts more 'stuff' on it, and returns to you, sitting down.

"This is gonna hurt." He scoots close, so that your legs are between his, and without another warning, presses the cloth to your cut.

"Oh crap!" you shout, and you're annoyed when Hobie starts chuckling.

"Oh crap!" he mimics in a high-pitched voice, meant to resemble yours. He places a large bandage on your leg, and a couple others on cuts that look a little nastier on your arms, and then sits back. "Think you'll survive," he comments. "Now, you need to tell me why you were in a fight. Looked like a couple of cats in a bag when I arrived."

You turn away, looking from where you sit at his kitchen table over to the TV, which is showing the news. Hobie always has the news on, even though he hates it and everything they ever talk about.

"It just, escalated. She was a fan, I guess, of the band. And she asked if I knew you, and I said yes. And she said... some not nice things. She was just drunk."

You're his whore, then? Do you think I could get in on some of that? I'm sure he's not very picky. I mean, look at you.

You can feel the way she grabbed at your stomach, pinching it. It felt like something scripted out of a bad teen movie, except it was really happening, and she just wouldn't stop.

"What did she say?" Hobie asks. When you look back at him, he's leaned forward, eyes narrowed, lips pursed.

"It doesn't really matter. It's over."

"It matters to me."

You shake your head and wave your hand in the air, as if to dismiss the conversation. "Really, Hobie. It was just, I don't want to relive it."

He reaches out and places a warm hand on your bruised knee. "Tell me."

You roll your eyes and sigh. "She said like, I must be, uh, sleeping with you and your standards must be low because... I'm like, fat, or whatever."

Hobie sits up, his back straight as a board, his eyebrows raised and his jaw a little slack. "And you beat the shit out of her?"

You draw your line into a straight mouth and nod. "Sort of. I mean, I can't fight but, she was bleeding and crying at the end of it. I was bleeding too but, I wasn't crying."

He nods, as if in approval. "Why does she think we're sleeping together?" he asked. "She's seen you, at a show or something?"

"I didn't get a whole backstory, Hobie. I guess so."

"Hm." He leans back, crossing his arms over his chest. "Must've noticed how I look at you. Everyone has. 'Cept you."

How Hobie looks at you? You try to think of what he could be referring to. Sometimes when he's on stage, he finds you in the crowd and smiles. But, you're good friends, so that doesn't seem all that exciting to you - does it seem that way to everyone else?

"How do you look at me?"

"Like I'd like to fuck you, Y/N. Like the shape of your body is all I can think about, and it really doesn't fucking matter what anyone else thinks about it. It fucking keeps me up at night."

It feels like you've been slapped in the chest, and all the air has left your lungs. Your mouth is instantly dry, and your legs feel weak.

Hobie is so dry, so even-toned, it's hard to tell if he's joking or not - but would that be a funny joke right now? Hobie is a lot of things, but he's not insensitive, and he certainly wouldn't try to hurt you on purpose.

"It does?" you ask finally.

He leans forward again, bringing his face just a few inches from yours. "I want you, Y/N. I thought I'd made it obvious, but now I see, I didn't."

You lick your bottom lip, and Hobie glances down at your mouth.

"Can I kiss you?" you ask, and a soft moan escapes his mouth, as if asking for permission turns him on. You feel his fingertips on your cheek, running upwards, until he cups your face in his hand.

You should close your eyes, you think, but the sight of him coming towards you is the most beautiful thing you've ever seen. His soft brown eyes, his full lips, his sharp cheek bones, his glistening piercings; you want to remember every sharp edge and round corner.

He pauses, just before your lips meet and whispers, "Anything you want to do to me, you can."

[seullovesme]

cockwarming w/ irene bae

pairing ⥬ g!p!irene x reader

genre ⥬ smut

warnings ⥬ sex, slight innocence kink

(nsfw under the cut btw)

just cuddling with irene, listening to her rambling away about her day and how much fun she had because she knows you'll listen to her even if it was nonsense. you discover her love for sudoku and you ask if she could do some with you.

she gets excited and brings out the sudoku book she started, telling you about how easy the first few levels were for her, trying her best to impress you which worked. she begins doing her thing as you compliment her, saying that you're so proud of your smart girl.

but because your girl is skilled, she finished the entire book with some of your help. she's so happy and wishes that you could do more together. this obviously results in you buying a ton of sudoku books because what the bae wants, the bae gets!

irene seated at her desk located in your room, innocently going through her new sudoku book in her sweats with a thin long-sleeve shirt on, when you spot her. she's adorable and you couldn't just stand and admire from afar.

you sit on her lap facing the desk and kiss her cheek, telling her to continue playing. she complies and goes back to filling the boxes with their designated numbers though she's curious on what you're planning to do.

you pull her sweats to her knees, shushing her when she gasped, telling her to put all of her focus on her game. she was trying to stay focused, but your hand on her now hard cock was definitely not helping in the slightest. she stopped and put down her pen when you began to sink down on her, grabbing your waist to guide you.

she was drowning in pleasure from feeling your velvety walls engulf her whole length like it was nothing, and she couldn't hold in her pretty sounds 😵‍💫���‍💫

you took her hands off of you and put them onto the table. "come on bae... be a good girl and finish up your game. i told you to focus on it didn't i?" you shifted a little to adjust your sitting position, making the sensitive girl under you whimper. she can only obey your command as she took the pen and studied the puzzle carefully, trying to work as fast as she could.

despite her efforts, you could tell she was working slower than she normally was, only spotting a few mistakes that she had made due to her being so distracted. it was cute hearing her struggle to refrain from moving around.

eventually, she completed the whole board and hugged your back, hoping you'd allow her to start railing the shit out of you. her hopes couldn't get very high as you interrupted her thoughts.

"good job! shall we start another?" you grinned and flipped the page, revealing a new one for her to do.

sorry it took a while to post i didnt realize i hit save to drafts instead of post LMFAO also i didnt edit 😞

[withahappyrefrain]

Cobalt Eyes and Sweet Smiles

In which a certain shy, quiet WSO catches your attention one night.

When your pilot friend offered to bring you to the Hard Deck as a guest, you knew their intentions instantly. The other pilots would notice you, notice how you weren't one of them, and try hitting you up.

"Maybe you'll actually meet someone to take home," they said.

You rolled your eyes and went along with it, tired of hearing about how "we gotta find you someone."

It was nice, being offered one's spot at the pool table, being asked if you wanted to play darts or needed a drink. The pilots were quite nice to look at.

But one in particular stood out to you.

He had tucked himself away in the corner of the bar, his cobalt eyes able to observe the room without being noticed.

You noticed him right away. How he tried to weave his long, lean body through the crowd so he didn't bump into anyone. How instead of a beer, he was carrying water and a cup of peanuts. How despite that his shoulders were hunched in an effort to make himself smaller, his biceps strained against the khaki material of his uniform.

You recognized the pins that adorned his uniform. He was a Lieutenant, and a pretty decorated one at that. Clearly that hadn't given him an overblown ego, otherwise he would have spoken to you by now.

He was attractive and you could tell that he didn't realize it. You knew the glasses he wore had been given to him by the navy and were what they referred to as "birth control glasses". But the large wired frames added to his charm.

You couldn't help but stare at him. A smile broke out onto your face when he looked up from brushing the crumbs off his pants, those stunningly blue eyes locking with yours.

His thin lips parted and you could see the realization that you were staring at him in his eyes. You winked, hoping it would wash away any potential doubts he had.

A red flush rose from his neck to his cheeks as he looked away, focusing on the crumbs that were still on top of his pants.

It was adorable.

"Who's that?" You asked the too cocky for his own good pilot who had been trying to strike up a conversation with you since you walked in. Hangover? Hangnail?

"Oh, that's just Bob," he scoffed, "Or as I call him, Baby on Board."

The ice cold glare you gave him stopped his laughs, "He uh, he doesn't say much."

You didn't mind quiet. In fact, you tend to like the quiet ones more as you got older. Perhaps it was because they seemed to balance you out.

Perhaps it was because you learned that it was always the quiet ones who knew how to make you feel the best.

"Who's the girl?" You asked, motioning to the dark haired woman who had sat down next to him. You watched her jerk her head towards you, her eyes briefly making contact with yours. They looked like friends, but you wanted to make sure.

"Oh, that's Phoenix. He's her back seater. So, do you want to watch me play darts?"

"No," was all you said before walking over to Bob.

—--------------------

"Go talk to her," Phoenix whispered, "She's been staring at you all night."

"Probably thinks I'm some cool, elusive guy. Best to not break the illusion," Bob responded before taking a sip of his water.

Phoenix wasn't sure what was so 'elusive' about eating peanuts at a bar, but her friend needed a confidence boost, not a confidence downer.

"You're a catch, and she's interested. She couldn't take her eyes off of you while Rooster sang," She pointed out.

Bob just shrugged as he shook his head.

You were absolutely beautiful. You lit up a room with one smile. From the way the corners of your eyes crinkle to how your nose scrunches up, to the way your smile encapsulates your whole face. Your voice was sweet, loud but not shrill.

You were a dream. And dreams didn't tend to go for quiet wallflowers like him. He learned this years ago and had accepted it. It made him less likely to get his heart broken.

Though he still felt his heart twinge when Hangman came up to you. Bob didn't blame the man, he was just….jealous, as ridiculous as that sounded. Jealous that he couldn't just waltz up and start a conversation.

He had tried in the past and ended up embarrassing himself more than getting someone's number. It was easier to hang in the corner, even if it made his chances of finding someone lower. It was better than getting his hopes dashed.

Not that Bob enjoyed being alone. Honestly, he had hoped that by now, he would have settled down and startef a family. When asked what he wanted to be as a kid, his response was "a dad".

Life just hadn't worked out that way and it was best not to dwell on it. As much as he wished, life wasn't some romantic comedy where his future wife would just waltz into a room and a love song would play while he and her locked eyes for the first time.

Though 'Pretty Woman' was playing when you walked into the Hard Deck.

Phoenix's elbow jabbing his chest broke Bob out of his thoughts.

"Looks like I don't have to convince you to go talk to her," was all she said before getting up to walk away.

Bob was quite confused, until he looked directly ahead.

Oh no.

You were walking straight towards him.

Bob knew he should get up and head straight to the bathroom. Or go to the bar. Something so you wouldn't talk to him and discover he was quiet not because he was some cool figure but because he never fucking knew what to say.

But his legs were frozen in place. All he could do was ensure that he had brushed all the crumbs from the peanuts off his pants.

"Hi! Is this seat taken?" You asked. Bob was now thankful he was still sitting, because your melodic voice paired with that sweet smile would have made him fall to his knees.

It took Bob a few moments to realize that he needed to actually give you a response. You didn't seem to mind, which was surprising. He was used to folks getting huffy, expecting a quick response from him.

Instead, you just gave him that beautiful smile.

"No! U-uh, no, i-its free, ma'am," he managed to get out.

"Glad to know," was all you said before you sat yourself on one of his thighs. You slung an arm around his shoulders, your fingers reaching up the nape of his neck towards his sandy brown locks.

Oh sweet Jesus.

You couldn't help but smirk as you watch his face process what was happening and then proceed to short circuit. He clearly wasn't used to this type of attention, which was an absolute shame.

"Uh…um t-there's a s-spot uh o-over there," He stuttered, avoiding your eyes.

"I know," you leaned in, your breath hot in his ear, "I like this seat better."

Did he and Phoenix actually eject out of their plane in time or did he die that day and was now in heaven?

Maybe she had mistaken him for someone else. Bob kept thinking of scenarios that would explain why you were doing this, besides you actually being interested in him, because someone like you was never interested in someone like him.

For a moment, you worried that you may have been too much. It looked like he was malfunctioning at your attention.

But then you felt a strong arm wrap itself around your waist, securing you in place.

"I-I'm uh…I'm Bob." God, he was so cute. His cheeks had what seemed to be a permanent flush to them.

You giggled as you told him your name, which caused the corners of his mouth to turn upwards.

"It's nice to meet you Bob," your fingers twirled around his sun kissed locks.

"It's n-nice to meet you t-too, ma'am," He mumbled. He honestly didn't know what to do. He was usually the one pretty girls went up to to ask about the relationship status of his other pilots.

"You're so nice, but you don't need to call me ma'am," you giggled.

Somehow, his face turned an even brighter shade of red as he mumbled an apology.

"It's okay, it's quite sweet. And hot, to be honest," you admitted.

Oh.

Bob looked up, his eyes making contact with yours for the first time since you sat on his lap.

Hot was not a word used to describe him. Cute, nice, nerdy, okay, were the adjectives he was used to hearing. Not hot.

"R-really?" His voice was still shaky, though it was the most confident he sounded since he began talking to you.

"Yeah," you giggled, straightening his collar, "So is Bob your call sign or your actual name? I can't tell with some of these."

"Well, my full name is Robert but my call sign is Bob," he found himself becoming more relaxed, despite having to remind himself not to look at your chest that was at eye level.

"Does Bob stand for something?" You asked, genuinely wanting to learn more about him.

He shrugged, "It's a long story." Surely you didn't want to hear him talk, did you?

"Have anything to do with your commendation medals?" You asked. He looked shocked at your knowledge. For a brief moment you were almost offended until you remembered that he honestly thought you were just a civilian.

"Both my dads are in the Navy. I know what a lot of the medals mean. It's also how I know this guy," you motioned to the man clad in a Hawaiian shirt who was leading the crowd through another Jerry Lewis sing-along.

"Does he know anything other than Jerry Lewis?" Bob asked out loud.

"If he's feeling extra deep, he'll play Clocks by Coldplay. Other than that…no, he doesn't."

The two of you exchanged a look before laughing. He had the sweetest laugh you had ever heard.

You rested your head on one of his broad shoulders. He was sitting up a little straighter. The tension in his body had faded. Not all the way, but a bit.

You liked it. You wanted to see more of it, more of him.

Though Bob didn't really suit him. Neither did Robert.

"Can I call you Robby?"

"You can call me whatever you want." Oh, so he could be smooth.

You grinned, "Whatever I want? That's quite open. My Pa always said to never take something open-ended until you made sure there weren't any strings attached."

He shrugged, a small smirk slowly appearing on his handsome face, "Well, I guess there is something I'd want in exchange."

You quirked an eyebrow, "And what would that be, Robby?"

Here goes nothing.

"You can call me whatever you want, as long as I can call you for dinner?" Oh God, that was so cheesy. What was he thinking? Bob didn't blame you if you got up and left right then and-

A pair of soft lips pressed against his cheek, the sweet smell of lavender flooding his nostrils.

Oh your lips were like heaven.

"I'd love that Robby. I'd also love to call you for breakfast," you cooed in his ear.

His large hand gripped the fabric of your dress. You wondered if he could feel your thighs clenching. Not that you didn't want him to know you found him extremely attractive. Quite the opposite in fact.

"Y-you smell really nice," was all he could get out. His head felt fuzzy. You were overwhelming in the best way possible.

"I was just gonna say the same about you," you smiled as the scent of sage filled your senses. You then noticed that his glasses had fallen down the bridge of his nose. With zero hesitation, you gently pushed them back up.

Bob was thinking of every possible unattractive thing and scenario to kill the growing erection he had. Your fingers that were tracing circles over his biceps weren't helping.

If this was a dream, he never wanted to wake up.

"W-would uh, would you want to get out of here?"

Realization set in at what he just said. Fuck. The last thing this angel wanted was to be taken back to base housing. The last thing he needed was Mickey walking in on him trying to flirt too. Also, when did she ever indicate she wanted to go back to a bedroom? She didn't. Yeah, she mentioned breakfast but maybe she was just a big fan of brunch. Brunch was pretty great. You could order waffles at two in the afternoon and no one bats an eye. Had he gone too far? He had gone too far.

Of course a beautiful girl would show interest in him only for him to fuck it up.

"We, we could go to another place! I-I, uh, I know this other bar, it's much quieter or there's a late night coffee shop we could go to, or-"

"My apartment is a fifteen minute drive, and I drove here." You told him.

"O-oh. O-okay." Bob was still worried. The last thing he wanted to do was make you feel pressured to do anything. He was truly more than content to just talk to you all night, maybe kiss you on the cheek if he was lucky. If you allowed it.

"I…..I have a good collection of board games if you're interested," you said, hoping it would alleviate his clearly displayed nerves.

"I-I just wanna, uh, wanna talk to ya," he admitted, a Midwestern drawl lacing his voice.

"Where you from Robby?" You asked, pressing your forehead against his. You could hear him gulp, his Adam's apple bobbing.

God, you wanted nothing more than to mark up his neck.

"M-Montana. W-why?"

"I could listen to your voice all day," you sighed, brushing your nose against his. It was obvious it took all his strength to not look away from you, to flash a weak smile instead.

"Really?" Normally, his accent wasn't something folks enjoyed hearing. After years in the navy, he learned how to make himself sound neutral.

You nodded your head, "Yeah. I like your voice. And you." That rose tint had made itself a home on his cheeks, not that you minded. It was honestly the cutest thing.

"Really?"

"Is that so hard to believe?" You asked. It was almost sad that he was genuinely shocked by this.

He shook his head, "I-it's just uh, usually, uh, I'm uh, not the one folks um, typically go for."

"Well, those folks are idiots," you responded, "you have a lot to offer: smart, sweet, kind, funny. Extremely handsome to boot."

You were being genuine. Bob couldn't help but smile, practically beaming.

"C-can I kiss you?" He found himself asking. Where that bravery came from, he wasn't sure.

He was genuine, something you didn't see often, particularly from those in the navy. Your fathers always had warned you of such, hence their 'no pilot' rule.

They never told you about what to do when you found a sweet, honest, good hearted man in the navy.

It probably helped that he wasn't technically a pilot.

You nodded your head quickly, not wanting to doubt for one moment, "Was beginning to worry that you'd never ask."

He was a good kisser. His large hands cupped your jaw and most of your neck. He was gentle when he titled your head down, moving his lips against yours.

You could kiss him for hours. When you broke away for air, his face was still red, though a proud smile was now on his face.

"You gonna take me home Robby?" You asked before placing a gentle kiss on his jawline.

"I-I don't know what your car looks like," his voice was now low, vibrating into your shoulder, a stark contrast to the adorable observation he was making.

You kissed his cheek again, the corner of your lips brushing against his, "you're really fucking cute Robby."

Bob knew in that moment he would follow you to the ends of the Earth.

"Y-you're um, you're one t-to talk." It sounded much smoother in his head. And yet, you didn't mind the stuttering or that he was still nervous despite being brave enough to ask if he could kiss you.

You liked him, just the way he was.

It was a nice change. A really nice change.

"Why don't we get out of here?" You hopped off his lap, extending a hand out to him.

Bob thanked whatever higher being was up there for throwing him a bone before he made an even bigger fool out of himself. Granted, you had made your interest in him well known, so was there really a point to being so nervous?

He grabbed your hand, following you out of the bar. As you two left, you flashed a wink to your friend Bradley, who simply gave you a thumbs up, signaling his approval.

"Did you plan that?" Phoenix asked as she watched you and Bob walk out the door.

"Not planned, more like hoped it would work out that way," Bradley responded, smiling.

[joeys-babe]

Joey B Imagines: Out of My League

————————————————————————-

Summary: Flashback. The story of how you and Joe came to be. Years before marriage and your little family.

Warnings: none, fluff

Pairing: Joe Burrow x reader

Imagine universe: Beginning of… Into The Mystic

A/N: Joe is a senior in high school and you are a junior. It's your first year at Athens HS! Also, most of these students' names are made up.

————————————————————————-

August, 2014

(Joe’s pov)

“Yo! Joey!” - Zach

I turned around to see one of my best friends running up to me.

“First day of senior year!” - Zach

“Yup! Just think about it, we’re like the big dogs now.” - Joe

“Ya know it. I heard that there's this really hot new chick coming from Kentucky.” - Zach

“Well, I don't want any part of that. I've got enough going on with football and schoolwork. Don't be surprised if my next girlfriend is in college.” - Joe

“Damn dude, that was pretty forward. You haven't even seen her yet. This could be your Juliette, Romeo!” - Zach

“I highly doubt it.” - Joe

We rounded the corner to find a few more of the football guys and a few of their girlfriends with them.

“Yeah, her name is y/n.” - Cassidy

“Who is?” - Joe

After making my presence known, Cassidy turned around and rolled her eyes at the sight of me.

“Dude, what was that for?” - Joe

“Shoo, Joe.” - Cassidy

“What, why?” - Joe

“Because I'd rather you leave than explain that we have a new girl just to hear you say you're focusing on football.” - Cassidy

“She’s got a point.” - Zach

“Who's side are you on?” - Joe rolled his eyes

Before Zach could answer, the bell rang, telling us to head to first period.

The group disbanded, and when everyone else went in the direction of the same classroom, I realized I was probably going to be alone in this class.

My first period was chemistry, and sadly, the teacher was notorious for a boy-girl seating chart.

I walked upstairs and found the room. When I walked in, everyone was in their seats already.

Looking for my name attached to a seat number on the board, I found it and then went on trying to find it.

The tables were for two people, and in the back corner where my table was, I saw that a girl was already occupying the other seat.

She was pretty, I won't lie, but I'd never seen her before.

The girl was looking down at her schedule when I sat my stuff down on the table, causing her to look up at me.

A warm smile spread across her lips, and I found myself studying her face a little too long.

“Hi.” - Joe

“Hey.” - you

I sat down next to her, my mind trying to come up with a conversation.

“Enjoying your first day so far?” - Joe

“Yeah, pretty well, you?” - you

“Same. Other than my friend’s girlfriend being rude to me for no reason.” - Joe

She laughed. It was one of the cutest laughs I've ever heard, and it was infectious too.

“I'm sure you didn't deserve it.” - you

“Thank you! I walked up to them, and she just rolled her eyes at me.” - Joe

“Dang man, she has beef with you.” - you

“That's what I'm sayin’. I don't know what I've ever done to her, though.” - Joe

“Ask her.” - you shrugged

“Nah, I don't care that much. Why am I even telling you this?” - Joe

“I don't know.” - you laughed

There's that laugh again.

“I just started unloading on you, huh? Well, I haven't seen you before so tell me about yourself.” - Joe

“Well, I'm a junior, so that's probably why. I'm not that interesting though. I strive for good grades, and I do gymnastics with a side of dance.” - you

“Oh really? I play football.” - Joe

“That's cool.” - you smiled

“Yeah, I’m feeling really good about this season, I just know it's gonna be great.” - Joe

“Well, I wish you luck.” - you

“I appreciate that, and you too. Hope gymnastics goes well.” - Joe

“Thank you.” - you smiled

Before the conversation could go further, the teacher started talking about what we should expect in this class. The teacher didn't stop me and my new seat buddy from talking, though.

As we talked longer, I realized we had a lot in common. I wouldn't be lying if I said she was the first girl I've talked to about Star Wars.

She was really fun, though, and easy to talk to.

Our conversation lasted till the bell rang, and we both sheepishly smiled when we realized that we'd been loudly talking in a quiet classroom.

I stood up and started packing my things. She did the same. The rest of the students were filing out of the room when we both put our backpacks on, seemingly in sync.

“I… I’m Joe, by the way. Joe Burrow, but most call me Joey.” - Joe

“It was nice talking to you, Joey. I'm y/n.” - you

She shook my hand and walked out of the door, leaving me shocked.

y/n… new hot girl from Kentucky.

After talking to her, it felt wrong to refer to her in that way. She was really pretty, but hot isn't a word I like to use when referring to girls.

I hope I have more classes with her. Woah, what am I saying?!

Focus on football, Joe.

——

Sadly, I didn't have any more classes with y/n, but I thankfully had friends in all my other classes.

I had lunch B, and most of my football buddies were in there, but I found myself zoning out while trying to look around the room for her.

Ever since the bell rang in chemistry, I haven't stopped thinking about y/n. It was becoming a slight problem, but it seemed like all I wanted was to go to chemistry tomorrow and talk to her.

After school ended, the football team stayed after school since we had our first home game the same day.

Hours later, we were suited up and ready to go out and stretch.

When we ran out and took the field as the senior quarterback, I was naturally the one leading the pack, but my eyes drifted toward the sideline.

One of the cheerleaders was flipping while the others were in stunts, but when she landed her last trick and posed, I gasped lightly when I saw who it was.

y/n.

That's how Cassidy knew her name! She’s a cheerleader!

“Joe! Where are you going?” - Zach

The sound of my teammate yelling snapped me out of my daydream, and I realized that when the rest of the team stopped running to stretch, I kept going because all I was paying attention to was y/n.

“Oh.” - Joe

I turned around and ran to where I was supposed to be, but when I turned around, y/n was smiling at me. I smiled back.

——

We ended up winning the game, which is always amazing, but even better since it was our home opener.

After walking back into the locker room to hear what the coaches had to say, I showered and packed up to find my parents.

I wasn't at all surprised when most of the cheerleaders were standing outside waiting. Most of their boyfriends were players, so they'd wait after for them.

My eyes landed on my parents and brothers, but as I was walking in their direction, I heard a familiar voice calling for me.

“Joe!” - you

I turned in the direction of the voice to see y/n speedwalking over to me with a smile on her face.

“Hey, y/n.” - Joe smiled

“Hey, you did well! I knew you said you played football but I wasn't expecting that. You're super good.” - you

Is it hot out here all of a sudden? Why is my face heating up?

“Thanks. You're really good too. I know those flips are hard to do. You make it look effortless.” - Joe

“Thanks… sorry I distracted you though.” - you

“Not your fault, I just wasn't expecting to see you. You look uh… good, by the way.” - Joe

“You too.” - you giggled

Just as I was about to say something else, I heard my mom's voice calling for me.

“Sorry, that's my mom. I gotta go.” - Joe

“It's all good. See you in chem?” - you

“See you in chem.” - Joe

As I walked away from her, I felt something I'd never felt before.

Oh no.

——

Next Day

It was Friday and lunchtime.

All my teammates were feeling good after the win yesterday, and sure, I was too, but that wasn't what was on my mind.

This morning in chemistry, I found myself lost in a conversation with y/n again. The disappointment when the bell rang was insane. I never wanted to stop talking to her.

She was just different.

The attention she got from other guys was because of her looks, and she was pretty, gosh, she was pretty… but I didn't like being around her for that.

We had a lot in common and never ran out of things to talk about. She listened to what I had to say and gave great feedback. We talked about our futures and what we wanted to be when we graduated.

I told her about my hopes of going to the league, and what she replied with gave me a flutter in my stomach that I'd never felt before.

“If you make it to the NFL, you have to invite me to come see you.”

I’d known this girl for two days and I was already ready to make that promise.

My mind was so stuck on that altercation that I didn't hear Zach talking to me from across the table.

“Joe? Joe!” - Zach

I flinched slightly and looked up at him, all the guys at the table watching me with weird looks on their faces.

“Sorry… I spaced out.” - Joe

“Anyway, Cassidy told me that y/n was asking about you at their lunch.” - Zach

“What? What'd she ask?” - Joe

Should my heart be beating this fast?

“Asked if you had a girlfriend, I guess. Don't worry, though, Cas told her that you're focusing on football.” - Zach

“Oh. Okay.” - Joe

Is that really what I want?

“She’s so funny to tease.” - Chad

“Seriously, she's got cheerleader brain.” - Max

Why are they talking about her like that??

“I gotta go.” - Joe

I stood up from the lunch table, quickly finding a trashcan and throwing my stuff away before walking out of the lunch room.

“What’s his problem?” - Max

“I don't know, bro.” - Chad

Zach knew because he was right. What he told me yesterday was haunting me.

Romeo, this could be your Juliette.

——

My thoughts ran wild as I went to the office and asked to do some volunteer work.

The receptionist gave me the okay to go down to the middle school for the remainder of the lunch period.

I drove over to the middle school and went up to the office, clicking the button to signal the office worker that I was out there.

When the door unlocked I was able to open it. I did, and whose eyes I met surprised me.

“y/n?” - Joe

“Oh, hey Joe.” - you

“What are you doing here?” - Joe

“Gonna head to a class to volunteer, I have a free period right now. Aren't you supposed to be in lunch?” - you

“Well, yeah, but I had to get out of there.” - Joe

“Why’s that?” - you

Her brows were furrowed like she could hear the slight edge in my voice.

“Some of the guys were saying stuff about you, kinda pissed me off, so I left.” - Joe

“What? You left because of that? I’m used to it, Joe. I'm just a dumb cheerleader.” - you

“You're not, though, that's why I didn't want to listen to it. I've only known you for two days, but I look forward to every conversation we share. They don't know you as I do.” - Joe

y/n placed a hand on my shoulder and smiled at me. Her eyes gave off a grateful look.

“You're the first person who’s made attempts to get to know me, and I appreciate it.” - you

“Not even your teammates?” - Joe

“I love ‘em, but they're not the Star Wars type like you are.” - you

“Yeah… I'm pretty cool like that.” - Joe

“Oh, whatever!” - you rolled your eyes

We laughed with each other before the receptionist cleared her throat. Both y/n and I froze when we realized where we were.

“Oh, sorry!” - you

“You guys can both go to room 379 if you’d like, seems like you two have a spark.” - receptionist

I rubbed the back of my neck nervously, but y/n smiled at the older lady and walked through the double doors into the building.

There weren't any words shared between us as we walked to the room, both of us were thinking about what the woman had said. Do we have a spark?

——

Ten minutes into hanging out with the sixth graders, the teacher sent y/n and me to the copy room.

“Hey, have you thought about formal?” - Joe

“What about it?” - you

Winter formal wasn't coming until December, obviously, but I felt the need to ask.

“Like are you going? Date ideas?” - Joe

“I figured I'd go, yeah. I don't know who I'm gonna go with, though. Might just go with friends, the guys here aren't the best.” - you

“Ouch.” - Joe

“Hey, I don't count you with them. You’re separate.” - you

“I think that's good.” - Joe

“It is. You're a jock, but a nice one, you know? I like you.” - you

My face dropped as I looked at her, feeling my cheeks flush and my stomach flop.

“Not in that way!” - you rushed to say

“Oh… okay.” - Joe

“Why do you act disappointed? I thought you weren't looking for anything and focusing on football.” - you

“I don't know. I thought I was, but you're making it hard to.” - Joe

“What does that mean?” - you

“I barely know you, but I can't stop thinking about you. You understand me in a way I didn't think was possible… you're just different.” - Joe

“I feel the same way about you. You're nerdy but athletic and have these quirks that I'm obsessed with. You're oddly the guy version of me.” - you

“Nah, you're the girl version of me.” - Joe

“Oh, whatever!” - you shoved his chest

I'm feeling a little bold after she told me she can't stop thinking about me either. Should I make a little move?

“You look cute when you do that. You roll your eyes at me but are smiling.” - Joe

“Oh, uh. Thanks.” - you blushed

“You're welcome.” - Joe smiled

——

October, 2014

That's as far as we went talking about it.

Nothing ever came from that one conversation we shared at the middle school. That's the closest thing we ever did that could come close to showing feelings for one another.

We just continued being really good friends who giggle in the back of the chemistry room, but the eye contact we make while I'm on the field and she’s on the sidelines tells me there's something there.

In the past two months, I've concluded that no matter how hard I try to deny it, I have a crush on y/n.

I just don't know how to act on it.

She still thinks that I don't want a relationship right now, so I need to start dropping hints.

The first step of my plan was to ask her to study with me after school, like at my house.

So, when I walked into chemistry this morning, I had that idea in the back of my head.

“Hey.” - Joe smiled

“Morning.” - you smiled back

I sat my stuff down and took my seat next to her.

“I need to ask you something.” - you

“Oh, what's that?” - Joe

“They haven't announced it yet, but I won junior attendant for homecoming.” - you

“Really?! That's awesome!” - Joe

“Yeah, thanks. We have to have a guy from the football team be our escort…” - you

“And you want me to ask someone for you?” - Joe

She looked at me with a “boy, please” look on her face that made me laugh.

“I'm just playing. I'd love to walk you.” - Joe

“Okay, good. Thanks, Joey.” - you

“Mhm. When will you find out who won Hoco Queen?” - Joe

“Not till the game, but if I win, you’ll get a little crown too.” - you

“I get a crown too?? Now you have to win.” - Joe

“I'll try my hardest. You have to help my campaign, though.” - you

“Sounds like a deal.” - Joe smiled

——

Later that week, I met up with y/n during my lunch period and her free period. I helped her campaign, and when she wasn't around, I convinced the football team to vote for her.

I wanted to make sure she'd win.

——

“Junior attendant, y/n y/l/n, escorted by Joey Burrow.”

The announcer’s voice beamed through the speakers as we walked down the middle of the football field. My arm was looped with y/n’s, and I shortened my strides with the length of her heals in mine.

I hadn't seen her till she walked out and looped her arm with mine, but she looked so beautiful.

“You look gorgeous.” - Joe whispered

“Thank you.” - you blushed

We smiled for the camera when we reached the end of the field, and y/n gently squeezed my arm when we walked over and stood in our directed spot.

“You don't look too bad yourself.” - you

Our conversation was drowning out the announcer’s voice, who was reading the short paragraph that y/n wrote a couple of days ago. She'd made me proofread it so many times that I had it practically memorized.

“y/n would like to thank her parents and friends, especially her best friend, who is escorting her tonight.”

That part was new.

My cheeks heated up when I looked down at y/n to see her already smiling at me. She'd never come out and said that I was her best friend, but I couldn't say it didn't make sense.

“Surprise.” - you nudged him

“I'm your best friend, huh?” - Joe

“Yeah.” - you smiled

“You're mine too.” - Joe

“No way!” - you pushed Joe’s chest

“Don't tell Zach I said that, though.” - Joe

Her smile was infectious, and I felt my lips mirror y/n’s expression.

The announcer went on to introduce the senior attendant and read her little background story.

“Now, ladies and gentlemen. Your 2014 football homecoming queen is…”

I reached my other hand up to squeeze y/n’s that was wrapped around my bicep.

“y/n y/l/n!”

“You did it! Go get your crown!” - Joe

She let go of my arm and walked back to the middle of the field.

I watched with a proud smile on my face as y/n was handed a bouquet, a sash draped over her shoulder, and the crown on her head.

There was so much adoration in my heart for her, and when she turned around to look at me, my smile only widened.

“C’mere!” - you mouthed

I slowly walked over to her, and y/n re-looped our arms.

Bowing my head slightly, the crown was put on top of it. y/n laughed at the sight of the crown adorning my forehead.

“Lemme fix that. It's kinda sideways.” - you

She stepped on her tiptoes and fixed it, a blush forming on my cheeks when her fingers brushed down my face when she pulled away.

“You look cute.” - you smiled

“Thanks.” - Joe grinned

——

December, 2014

“Hey.” - Joe

“Oh, hey.” - you

I put my stuff down and sat down in my chair, the same routine since the first day of school. Hopefully, though, today some things will change.

Or at least be set in the right direction to change.

“I need to ask you a question.” - Joe

“Shoot.” - you

“Be my date too formal?” - Joe

I looked at her with hopefulness in my eyes. Please say yes.

“I'm already going with Chad… sorry, Joe.” - you

“Oh. It's okay, I just thought… nevermind.” - Joe

My shoulders slumped as I turned away from her and faced the board, biting the insides of my cheeks nervously.

The one time I shoot my shot with a girl, and I get rejected.

Guess that tells me what my priorities should be.

Focusing on football.

——

“What do you mean Joe’s here alone?” - you

“Yeah, Zach had to practically beg him to even come. Joe said there wasn't any point in going since he didn't have a date.” - Cassidy

“That makes me feel terrible…” - you

“Why?” - Cassidy

“Because he asked me, but I'd already said yes to Chad.” - you

“It's not your fault, how were you supposed to know that Joe was gonna ask you? I mean, he isn't looking for anything right now.” - Cassidy

“Yeah… do you know where he is?” - you

“No idea. Probably hiding in a corner.” - Cassidy

“Chad literally ditched me after pictures. Joe never would've done that…” - you

A few seconds of silence between the two girls went by before Cassidy had a lightbulb moment.

“Do you have a crush on Joe?!” - Cassidy

“What?! No!” - you

“You so do! y/n you should tell him! I honestly think he feels the same way…” - Cassidy

“No… he's focusing on football.” - you sighed

“So you do like him?” - Cassidy

“Maybe…” - you

When you admitted it out loud, it felt real. You like Joe.

Joey Burrow, the quarterback with the nerdy side that only you knew of, the one with the imperfect but adorable smile, the one that made you look forward to first period, your crush.

“I'm gonna go find him.” - you

You walked as fast as your heels allowed you and threw your half-drank cup of subpar punch in the trash can, pushing open the gym doors as Tongue Tied by GROUPLOVE playing through the speakers served as a soundtrack.

Zach wasn't hard to find as a sea of letterman jackets was in the hallway.

“Where’s Joe?” - you

“Oh, hey, y/n! He said he was gonna go take a walk around.” - Zach shrugged

You nodded and walked away toward the academic wing of the school.

Only the generator lights were on, but there was enough lighting to make out that familiar tall frame looking into the trophy cases.

Carefully, so as to not scare him, you slowly walked up behind Joe and tapped his shoulder.

“Hi.” - you

“Hi.” - Joe

“Chad ditched me…” - you

“That sucks.” - Joe

He hadn't even looked up at you yet.

“I'm sorry. If I had known you were going to ask me, I wouldn't have said yes to him.” - you

“S’okay, probably for the better.” - Joe

“Why are you just walking around by yourself, Joe?” - you

“Nothing else to do. Kinda bored.” - Joe

“Wanna go see what teachers left their classrooms unlocked?” - you grinned

Joe’s eyes drifted away from the trophy case for the first time and found yours. A smile pulled at his lips as he nodded his head.

You held your hand out to him, and Joe gladly accepted, clasping his fingers with yours.

There were so many unspoken feelings shared between you two as you made your way down the hallways to find an open door.

“The chem room is open…” - Joe

You gently opened the door and pulled Joe in behind you, the lights being motion-activated turned on as you two walked in.

Joe flicked the light switch back off as the moonlight through the window lit up the room.

Making your way to your table, you and Joe sat down in your respective seats without sharing a word.

“Your dress is pretty.” - Joe

With a longing glance, you examined Joe’s hair, outfit, and shoes.

“Thanks. You look handsome.” - you

“Thanks.” - Joe smiled

A few seconds of silence went by before Joe cleared his throat, immediately getting your attention.

“Uhm… can I be honest with you?” - Joe

“Always.” - you

Here goes nothing.

“I think you're amazing. Talking to you every day makes me want to come to school, and I enjoy every word that's shared between us. You get to see a side of me that many people don't because I feel safe with you. I hope what I'm about to tell you doesn't ruin that, and you might just see me as a friend… but I like you.” - Joe

“In what way?” - you

In all honesty, you knew exactly what he meant, but you wanted to hear him say it.

“In the way that I find myself staring at you all the time because I think you're beautiful, In the way that you give me butterflies when you laugh or smile at me. You are incredible, y/n; gorgeous, smart, talented, crazy athletic, loyal, trustworthy.” - Joe

He paused for a second to scan your face for somewhat of a reaction.

“Now that I think about it, you're so out of my league.” - Joe laughed

“Go on, Joey.” - you giggled

“What I'm trying to say is… I have a crush on you, y/n.” - Joe

“Mr. ‘I'm focusing on football’ has a crush on me?!?” - you

Joe felt his stomach drop at your teasing. He'd just poured his heart out, and was thinking the worst.

“So you don't feel the same way?” - Joe

“What? I didn't say that!” - you

“So…?” - Joe

“I like you too, Joe. More than friends.” - you

“Really?” - Joe smiled

“Yeah.” - you grinned

You two sat there, no words shared, just tooth-rotting grins.

“I've never done this before… what happens next?” - Joe

“I think there's another question you need to ask me.” - you

“Oh, yeah! y/n…” - Joe

He took your hand in his, the size difference making your heart flutter for a second before you shifted your attention back to his beautiful blue eyes.

“Be my girlfriend?” - Joe finished

“I'd love to.” - you smiled

Somehow, your other hand found its way into his. Almost as if magnets were pulling your faces together, you both leaned in.

Your lips molded together so perfectly like you were each other’s missing piece.

Maybe because you guys were.

Joe would forever be grateful that he took the leap of faith and confessed to the girl that he swore was out of his league, for she would become his everything for the rest of his life.

That chemistry room is where you found your first real boyfriend, who would be your first kiss, and unbeknownst to you, you were Joe’s first real girlfriend and kiss as well.

In fact, you were each other’s first everything.

And you'd also be each other’s last.

————————————————————————-

Authors note: One of my favorite requests to write, it was so fun picturing the beginning of their relationship!

Request for this fic;

Hope you enjoyed! 💕

[ray4hotchner]

Reckless

❀ 𝕡𝕒𝕚𝕣𝕚𝕟𝕘: aaron hotchner x reader

❀ 𝕤𝕦𝕞𝕞𝕒𝕣𝕪: Y/N, a team member of the BAU, faces her past during a challenging case. Struggling to cope, Y/N's impulsive actions strain her relationship with Hotch.

❀ 𝕨𝕠𝕣𝕕 𝕔𝕠𝕦𝕟𝕥: 5.5k

❀ 𝕒𝕦𝕥𝕙𝕠𝕣’𝕤 𝕟𝕠𝕥𝕖: Hi everyone, I finally caved in and wrote something on my own. This is my first fic, so let me know what you think

❀ 𝕞𝕒𝕚𝕟 𝕒𝕔𝕔: @iyv-ray24

On Ao3

Normally, Y/N was one of the last people to board the jet after a case. Not this time though. She didn't wait for the team and drove straight from the sheriff's station to the airport once the case was wrapping up. It had been a couple of stressful days, and everyone was exhausted. However, Y/N was not only exhausted but also very, very pissed – pissed at the team, pissed at herself, but most importantly, at Hotch.

This case was not easy for any of them. Three girls between the ages of 9 and 13 were abducted, horribly abused, and killed before their bodies were dumped in different local parks in the city. The BAU was called in when the third child was missing, but unfortunately, they arrived way too late. Now, the fourth girl, Casandra Johnson, an 11-year-old, was missing.

Most of the times, Y/N wouldn't have problems with distancing herself emotionally from cases, but this one just hit too close to home. Her little baby sister was abducted from their front porch when she was 9. Y/N herself was only a teenager at that time, and she was the one babysitting her sister. Just a couple of minutes of distraction, and her baby sister was gone forever. They found her body a week later, and the man who killed her luckily got caught, but Y/N never forgave herself and lived every day with the guilt of letting her sister down.

Yep, the team knew all about this stuff. They were familiar with each other's messed-up pasts and traumas; they were like a close-knit family, after all. So, when Penelope started laying out all the details about the case, she could feel her teammates' eyes on her. Sure, it wasn't easy to stare at pictures of innocent little girls and remember what happened to her own sister, but that wasn't going to stop her from getting her job done. She was a pro at this, and as far as she was concerned, this was just another case.

She found herself in the tiny kitchenette of the jet, pouring a cup of coffee, when Hotch walked over.

"Hey, want some coffee?" she offered, but he just shook his head.

"You doing okay?" he asked, standing close because the kitchenette was so darn small.

"Why wouldn't I be?" she replied, knowing exactly why, but she wasn't about to show her feelings to him.

"You could sit this one out, you know.”

"Hotch, no way! Please don't even suggest that! These girls deserve justice, and I've got to see it through."

"I get it, but if things start getting too heavy and overwhelming, promise me you'll give me a heads-up," he said gently.

"You bet," she nodded.

They hung there for a few more seconds. Hotch's presence always had a calming effect on her, and she felt more grounded when he was around. He saw the tension on her face and he probably wanted to reach out and offer comfort, but he held back. So, he turned around and went back to his seat. She watched Hotch walk away and caught eyes with Emily, who gave her a knowing look. She was the only one on the team who knew how Y/N felt about Hotch. To this day, she regretted telling Emily, on a drunken night, that she had a crush on their boss. Emily had persistently encouraged her on more than a few occasions to confess her feelings, but she had consistently declined, fearing the potential embarrassment and awkwardness it could create between them. Emily smirked at her, but she only mouthed "Don't" before also returning to her seat.

The case was progressing as usual – examining the crime scene, talking to victims' relatives and potential eyewitnesses, and creating the unsub profile. Throughout the investigation, the team noticed Y/N becoming increasingly agitated. However, things took a sharp downward turn after Casandra was kidnapped. Y/N grew moody, neglected sleep and food, and immersed herself in reexamining the same files and evidence over and over again.

Y/N and Spencer found themselves back at the last crime scene, as Y/N insisted on revisiting it, when new information arose. Penelope added them to the group call and informed everyone that her research had led her to a man fitting the unsub's profile. She sent over his last registered address.

"We're nearby. It's not far from the last crime scene," Y/N informed the team.

"We'll meet you guys there," Derek said before they ended the call. Y/N and Spencer then drove to the address.

They parked in front of the house and awaited the team's arrival when Y/N spotted movement inside. She immediately called Hotch.

"Hotch, there's someone in the house. Maybe he's holding the girl in there. We need to go in. Now!"

"We'll be there shortly. You can't go in there without backup," Hotch cautioned.

"Spencer is here too."

"Agent Y/L/N, I said wait. That's an order!" Hotch's tone was stern.

"I'm sorry, I have to," Y/N replied, and with that, she exited the car and headed toward the front door of the house. Hotch heard Spencer shouting after Y/N before the call ended. Cursing under his breath, he instructed Derek to speed up.

In under 5 minutes, the team reached the unsub's address. The front door had been kicked open, and the team could hear Y/N yelling at someone.

"Where is he? Tell me! Where is your brother?" She was shouting, pinning a young man facedown on the carpet. Y/N's knee was pressed into his back, immobilizing him as she held his hands behind his back.

"Agent Y/L/N, that's enough!" Hotch's order rang out, and he turned to Emily, gesturing for her to take over. Emily walked over, cuffed the man's hands, and assisted him to his feet. The officers and the team exited the house. As they were leaving, Hotch turned to Y/N and said, "We will discuss this later."

Upon arriving at the station, Hotch instructed Derek and Rossi to interrogate the suspect's brother regarding the unsub's whereabouts. He told the team, except for Y/N, to leave the room the sheriff assigned to the BAU upon their arrival. Facing her, Hotch clenched his jaw, in order to stay calm.

"You are off the case," he stated in an unwavering voice.

"Hotch, no, I'm—"

"You. Are. Off. The case. Agent Y/L/N."

"That's not fair. We have the guy's brother."

"That's not fair? That's not fair? Are you really talking back right now?" Hotch's anger escalated.

"I said I'm sorry! But what if we would have lost our chance? That guy had his things packed; he was leaving!"

"I don't care if he was leaving or not! You can't act on your own in situations like this! You put yourself and Spencer in danger."

"We're fine!"

"Yeah, luckily! But you didn't know what awaited you behind that door. Both of you could have been injured or worse. Your actions were selfish and unprofessional. I don't want you anywhere near anything related to this case until we're back in Quantico. Do you understand?"

Y/N didn't even respond; she simply stormed out of the room. She headed straight to the bathroom, seeking some privacy to calm down. Splashing her face with ice-cold water, she leaned over the sink, taking deep breaths while still seething with anger. Just then, JJ entered the restroom. Like everyone else at the station, she had heard the heated exchange between Hotch and Y/N and came to check on her.

"Hey, are you alright?"

"I'm off the case."

"Maybe it's for the best, don't you think?"

"Not you too, JJ," Y/N replied, releasing a heavy sigh as she dried her hands and face. She walked past JJ and left the restroom, unwilling to argue with her as well. Although she was banned from anything related to the case, Hotch hadn't instructed her to leave the station entirely or return to the hotel, so she remained. In the breakroom, she sat, observing and straining to catch any updates. She watched as Derek and Rossi emerged from the interrogation room, but they refused to share information due to Hotch's orders. Naturally, Spencer and Emily also followed Hotch's directives, all for Y/N's own well-being.

Suddenly, there was movement as the team geared up, putting on their vests. Clearly, they had a new lead. Y/N swiftly rose, walking toward the team to grab her own vest, but Hotch halted her immediately.

"I told you that you're not allowed anything related to the case."

"Hotch, come on! Punish me with paperwork or anything else, but not like this, please!"

"No."

"Hotch, maybe you should—" Derek attempted to intervene.

"I said no!" Hotch's tone was firm as he locked eyes with Y/N. He could see the anger in her eyes and how she was holding back tears of frustration. With Hotch's final words, the team exited the station and drove away. Unable to hold back, Y/N retreated to the bathroom, shedding a few tears of anger. She knew she had made a mistake and was in the wrong, but the frustration and sense of being left behind lingered. Hotch should have been the first to understand the weight of guilt from not saving a loved one. Yet, he treated her as the issue, disregarding the missing child who might require the help of every agent for her rescue.

She let out a deep breath, a release that felt like she had been holding it in for days, as the team returned to the station with the little girl in Emily's arms. Y/N's gaze remained fixed on the heartwarming scene of the girl reuniting with her parents, embraces and kisses shared all around.

Mistiness gathered in Y/N's eyes once more, her mind drifting to how it might have felt to get her own little sister back all those years ago. Lifting her eyes from the heartwarming family reunion, her gaze locked with Hotch's, and it was as if he could read her thoughts. He took a step towards her, but she promptly spun around and walked away.

Hotch was not surprised by her reaction; he didn't even know why he had attempted to approach her. He did know, deep down, but he wasn't ready to admit it to himself, especially not at this moment. A few minutes later, he noticed Y/N storming out of the station, her bag slung over her shoulder.

"She said she'll be waiting by the jet," JJ informed Hotch as they both watched Y/N leave.

That was why she found herself being the first to arrive at the jet, a rarity. Normally, she'd take the seat in front of Hotch, and they'd dive into their paperwork during the flight back home. It was an opportunity to talk and maybe even steal glances at his handsome face. But now, she didn’t even want to hear his voice.

Instead, she settled onto the broad couch, the same one where Spencer often napped, and attempted to drift into sleep. Exhaustion from the past days quickly pulled her into slumber. She faintly registered the team entering the jet and briefly woke at takeoff, but she promptly turned away and slipped back into sleep, determined to avoid everyone, especially Hotch.

The jet's interior was dimly lit, and most of the team dozed off in their seats. Hotch occupied a couple of seats away from the couch where Y/N was deeply asleep, while Rossi sat directly in front of him. He observed her for a moment, noticing her curling up into a ball – she must be cold. The realization prompted Hotch to stand up promptly. He opened one of the jet's cupboards and retrieved a blanket. Quietly, he approached Y/N and draped the blanket over her, observing as she snuggled into the soft fabric. With the exception of Rossi, everyone else was already asleep, so his actions would likely go unquestioned by the team. Besides, he was merely helping a colleague, right? He lingered by her side for longer than necessary; her relaxed face was undeniably beautiful, and he wanted – no, needed – to savour it for just a little while longer. He was painfully aware that the only expression he'd encounter in her eyes when she woke would be resentment toward him. He would give anything to reach out and caress her cheek at this very moment. Eventually, he returned to his seat, and Rossi's gaze immediately landed on him.

"You're hopeless, Aaron," Rossi chuckled.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Hotch replied, his gaze shifting to the files before him.

"You know, she kind of has the right to be angry at you."

"You can't seriously think that what she did was right."

"No, I do not. It was actually really fucking dumb, but you're sort of being a hypocrite here."

"How so?"

"Well, yes, she made a mistake barging into that house on her own, and she acted impulsively. But so did you. Every one of us has made stupid mistakes at some point, and hers at least helped us locate the unsub. If it were any other agent, you would have let them join the rescue and handed them a pile of paperwork as punishment later. But because you have an emotional attachment to her and feelings for her, you were afraid she'd act recklessly again. You couldn't risk her getting hurt, like, say, jumping in front of a bullet – which we both know she would have. So, you left her behind. Not to mention, you understood why she acted the way she did. This case was deeply personal to her. Needless to say, you both acted like idiots."

Hotch leans back in his seat and lets out a sigh. He knows Rossi's right, though sometimes he hates working with profilers.

"We all want to protect the people we love, Aaron. But remember, she's still an agent, and this is her job," Rossi adds before returning to his files.

Hotch glances over at her and ponders Rossi's words. He realizes he definitely overreacted because it was you who put yourself in danger. He knows she's a great agent and can take care of herself in these dangerous situations, but just the thought of something happening to her makes his stomach drops.

It had been a couple of days since the team had returned to Quantico, and as Hotch expected, Y/N was avoiding him at all costs. She submitted her reports well before the deadlines, left the office earlier than usual – a rarity for her, as she was typically one of the last agents to leave. Hotch even noticed her falling silent whenever he entered the break room or the bullpen, and she seemed to find excuses to distance herself from him. This avoidance was starting to irritate him more and more. He missed the late nights spent doing paperwork together in his office after everyone else had gone home. He longed to hear her laughter and engage in conversations with her. He just missed her. While she appeared to be getting along fine with the rest of the team, her anger toward Hotch still lingered. He knew he needed to talk to her and explain his actions; he hoped that she might understand once he did.

So, as soon as he arrived at the office the following day, he made it a priority. Upon entering his office, he noticed Y/N's completed report on his desk, finished once again before deadline. He was aware that she was completing her work ahead of time to avoid any interaction with Hotch about the report. Without even glancing at the report, he stepped back out of his office.

"Agent Y/L/N, a word, please," he said, his tone possibly more agitated than he had intended. The rest of the team exchanged questioning looks as Y/N ascended the few stairs to his office. She knocked on the door, even though it was already open, and announced herself before entering.

"Close the door," Hotch ordered, his voice firm as he removed his jacket.

He had initially only wanted to apologize and explain his decision on the case, but seeing that finished report again ignited a kind of anger within him. Particularly because he knew how much she despised working on it in the first place. Now, she stood in front of him, alone for the first time in days, yet she didn't even glance at his face.

"You finished your work early again, Agent Y/L/N?"

"Yes, sir." Sir... she never called him 'sir.' He really wanted to hear his name from her. He tried to catch her eyes, but she purposely looked away. There was a brief silence before she finally spoke up, "Is there something wrong with it, sir?"

His emotions were getting the better of him due to her distant tone, possibly amplified by the frustration that had built up over the past few days. So, he responded with unnecessary sharpness.

"Yeah, there's something wrong with it. Do it again," he snapped, tossing the file onto the desk closer to her. For the first time in days, she met his eyes, her brows furrowed in irritation, though her voice remained calm.

"May I ask what was wrong with it, sir?" she inquired, striving to sound neutral.

"You may not, Agent! Get back to your work," he replied, his voice unintentionally louder than he intended.

Y/N stormed out of the room, doing her best to restrain herself from slamming the door behind her. She settled back at her desk, aware of her colleagues' watchful eyes on her, though no one said a word. In his office, Hotch couldn't help but curse under his breath. "Why did I do that?" he wondered. This kind of pettiness was uncharacteristic of him, yet there was something about her that could evoke such strong emotions from him, both positive and negative.

He struggled throughout the remaining day to focus on his work, his mind repeatedly drifting to thoughts of her. Glancing at the clock, he realized that the workday was drawing to a close. He had planned to talk to her today, and he was determined to do it before she left, especially since she tended to head out before the others. Stepping out of his office and peering down into the bullpen, he noticed Spencer packing up while Y/N and Emily waited. Derek and Penelope were already on their way to the elevator, and Rossi had left hours ago due to personal matters.

"Y/L/N, to my office, please," he called out in his strong voice from the top of the stairs before returning back into his office. Spencer and Emily exchanged glances, and while Y/N was clearly displeased, it was inevitable that she had to have a conversation with Hotch.

"You guys go ahead. Don't wait for me. I'll see you tomorrow," she said, placing her bag back on her desk before making her way up to Hotch's office.

"Sit down," Hotch says as she enters his office, gesturing to the free chair in front of his desk.

"For how much longer do you plan to keep this up?" Hotch asks in a plain tone.

"I don't know what you're talking about, sir."

Hotch rubs his face and lets out a sigh before continuing. "Cut it out! This whole 'sir' thing. You haven't spoken to me in days. It's affecting the work environment."

"I don't think it's affecting anything. I've been working efficiently, and my reports are always on time."

"I don't give a damn about your reports, Y/N!" Hotch exclaims, standing up and slamming his hands on the table as he leans toward her.

She stands abruptly. "Then there's no reason for me to be here if this isn't work-related," she nearly yells, matching Hotch's intensity. She starts to turn around, indicating her intention to leave.

"You're not leaving before we talk about what happened and clear this up!", he said and walked around his desk to now stand infront of her.

"There's nothing to clear up!"

"How is there nothing to clear up? You've been avoiding me since we got back from the case. You won't talk to me, you won't look at me—hell, you leave the room when I walk in."

Hotch's frustration was palpable as he stepped closer to her. "You think you can just avoid me and everything will be fine? You think you can act like nothing happened?"

Y/N's voice trembled with anger. "I'm doing my job, just like I always have."

"Your job? This is more than just about your damn job. We're a team, and that means communication and trust."

Y/N shot back, her voice rising. "Trust? Is that what you call it? You completely shut me out during the case. You made me feel like I can't make decisions, like I'm incapable."

Hotch's eyes blazed with frustration. "I made a decision to protect you, to keep you safe!"

"By treating me like a child? By belittling me in front of the team?" Y/N's cheeks were flushed, her anger evident.

"You were reckless, Y/N! You put yourself and Spencer in danger!"

"I had a lead, I had a chance to save that girl!"

"By charging into a potentially dangerous situation without backup? You're lucky nothing worse happened."

Y/N's fists clenched at her sides. "You don't understand. You never understand."

"Oh, I understand more than you realize," Hotch retorted, his voice dripping with frustration.

The room seemed to crackle with tension as their argument escalated. Each word was a jab, a release of the pent-up emotions they had been harboring. The distance between them had grown from physical to emotional, and they were both struggling to bridge the gap.

Suddenly, a knock echoed through the room, and JJ's head appeared in the doorway. "Oh, sorry for disturbing. I just wanted to say goodbye before I leave. Don't let me interrupt," she said, sensing the tension in the room, and then closed the door behind her. Throughout JJ's brief interaction, Y/N and Hotch's eyes remained locked on each other.

JJ's interruption seemed to inject a moment of calm into the charged atmosphere, allowing a slight easing of the tension in the room.

Hotch's voice broke the silence once again, this time with a calmer and more composed tone. "Believe me, I understand why this case held such significance for you. The entire team recognised that. However, that doesn't justify putting yourself in harm's way."

Y/N's voice softened, her frustration mingling with a touch of vulnerability. "I know it was reckless to charge in without waiting, and I've already apologized for that—I'm still sorry. But what you did was unfair. You left me behind. Aren't we supposed to be a team? How could you make that decision, Hotch?" Her eyes misted over, a mixture of hurt and confusion in her gaze.

Hotch's gaze softened as he heard the hurt in her voice. He took a step closer, closing the physical distance between them, and rested his hands on his hips. "Y/N, it's not about whether you apologized or not. It's about the fact that you charged into a dangerous situation without considering the consequences. In this line of work, we can't afford to act on emotions alone. We have to think logically, strategically. Acting solely on emotion can get people killed."

Y/N's eyes welled up with tears as his words sank in. She looked down at her hands, her voice choked with emotion. "I know that, Hotch. I do. But in that moment, all I could think about was finding that girl, saving her. It was like... I couldn't control myself."

Hotch took another step forward, his presence a comforting presence in front of her. He reached out and gently lifted her chin, guiding her gaze to meet his. His touch was tender, his thumb caressing her cheek. "Y/N, I get it. I do. But I was scared. Scared of losing you, of seeing you hurt. I couldn't bear the thought of something happening to you."

She looked up at him, tears streaming down her cheeks. His touch was a lifeline, grounding her in this vulnerable moment. "I... I couldn't save my sister," she whispered, her voice trembling. "I was supposed to be watching her, and I let her down."

Hotch's grip on her chin tightened ever so slightly, his eyes locking onto hers. He leaned in closer, his voice tender. "Y/N, what happened to your sister wasn't your fault. You were just a child yourself. You couldn't have known."

A sob escaped Y/N's lips as she leaned into his touch, her tears falling freely now. Hotch gently wiped away her tears with his thumb, his touch soothing. "It's okay to feel the pain, Y/N. But you can't let it dictate your actions now. You have so much strength, so much potential. I just want to keep you safe."

She let out a shaky breath, her emotions raw and exposed. Hotch's presence and his words were a balm to her wounded heart. "I'm sorry," she whispered, her voice filled with remorse.

Hotch shook his head softly, his eyes never leaving hers. "There's no need to apologize. I should have handled things differently too. We both made mistakes."

They stood there for a moment, their gazes locked, and the air around them seemed to shift. Hotch took a step forward, his hand moving from her chin to her cheek, his touch gentle and caring.

"Y/N, we're a team. And I promise you, I'll always have your back. But I need you to promise me that you'll think before you act, that you'll prioritize your safety."

She nodded, her tears slowing as a small smile tugged at her lips. "I promise."

And in that moment, with their bodies close and their gazes intertwined, they found a connection that went beyond words—a connection forged in vulnerability, understanding, and the unspoken bond of a team that had weathered the storm together.

Y/N closes the distance between them and wraps her arms around Hotch in a tight embrace. Her face is buried in his chest, and he holds her close, his hand caressing her hair with utmost tenderness. In this vulnerable embrace, their walls begin to crumble, and the weight of unspoken emotions hangs heavily in the air.

Hotch's voice is barely above a whisper as he presses his lips to her ear, letting all the truths he had been holding back spill forth. "I was so scared, Y/N... scared to lose you. I can't bear the thought of ever losing you. Please, don't ever put yourself in that kind of danger again."

His words are a mixture of desperation and genuine concern, a heartfelt confession that had been weighing on him for far too long. He holds her tighter, his grip on her waist firm yet gentle. "I don't know what I would do without you. You've become such an important part of my life."

His voice quivers with emotion, each word carrying the weight of his feelings. "I missed talking to you, missed hearing your laugh. Even the complaints about paperwork, I missed those too. You mean so much to me, Y/N, more than you might realize."

Y/N's grip on him tightens, her tears soaking into his shirt as she listens to his heartfelt words. It's a moment of vulnerability, of raw honesty that they had both been avoiding. Hotch's whispers in her ear are like a soothing melody, erasing the tension that had been building between them.

Their embrace lingers, a silent acknowledgment of the unspoken bond that ties them together. Hotch continues to caress her hair, his touch a silent reassurance of his feelings. In this moment, surrounded by their shared emotions and the warmth of their connection, they find solace in each other's arms.

Y/N pulls away slightly, creating enough space to look up at him, her eyes glistening with sincerity. She takes a deep breath before speaking, her voice a mix of vulnerability and determination. "Hotch, Aaron... I became so upset about this situation because it was you who was disappointed in me. You mean the world to me. Your opinion, your feelings, they matter more than I can even express. Not just as my boss, but as a friend and... and maybe, just maybe, even more."

Her cheeks flush with a soft hue of pink as she admits her feelings, her gaze dropping to the floor as if overwhelmed by the weight of her confession. She's both relieved and terrified to have finally voiced her emotions, unsure of how he'll react despite his previous words of comfort.

Hotch's breath catches in his throat as he absorbs her words. His heart races, and a mixture of surprise, hope, and affection blooms in his chest. He reaches out to gently lift her chin, his thumb brushing against her skin as he tilts her face up to meet his gaze. His expression is a mixture of tenderness and warmth, his eyes reflecting the depth of his feelings.

"Y/N..." Hotch's voice is soft, carrying a mix of emotions that mirror her own. He searches her eyes, his thumb tracing over her cheekbone, his touch both soothing and electrifying. "I've been struggling with my own feelings, with the fear of crossing a line. But I want you to know... you're important to me too. More than I can put into words."

A gentle smile tugs at the corners of his lips, his gaze locked onto hers. "I never wanted to push you away or make you feel like your actions don't matter. They do, because you matter. And I'm sorry if I made you think otherwise."

Y/N's heart swells with his words, and the warmth of his touch resonates deep within her. Her eyes well up with tears, but this time they're tears of relief and joy. Her lips tremble into a soft smile as she meets his gaze with renewed hope.

"I'm glad we talked," she whispers, her voice filled with sincerity. "I don't want to avoid you, Aaron. I want us to be honest with each other, no matter what happens."

Hotch's thumb continues to caress her cheek, his touch grounding her in this moment of emotional intimacy. "I feel the same way," he admits, his voice a mere breath against her lips. "And I promise, from now on, we'll face things together."

Their proximity becomes charged with a newfound understanding, their unspoken connection now verbalized. And as they stand there, gazing into each other's eyes, they both know that this conversation is just the beginning of a deeper and more meaningful journey ahead.

As the weight of their emotions lingers in the air, Y/N takes a small step closer, her heart pounding with a mixture of anticipation and vulnerability. Hotch's gaze softens even further, and in that moment, they both feel the pull of an unspoken desire.

Without any more hesitation, Y/N tilts her head slightly, her lips brushing against his in a tentative yet gentle kiss. It's a kiss filled with the tenderness of their shared feelings, a silent promise of everything they've both been longing for.

Hotch's arms instinctively wrap around her, pulling her closer as he deepens the kiss with a mixture of longing and affection. His lips move against hers with a slow and deliberate rhythm, their connection intensifying as their bodies press against each other.

The air between them grows warmer, their shared emotions igniting a spark of passion. Y/N's fingers thread through his hair, holding him close as the kiss becomes more heated, a reflection of the desires they've kept hidden for so long.

Their breath mingles, the world around them fading as they lose themselves in the intoxicating sensation of their lips moving together. The kiss becomes a dance of emotions, each movement a declaration of their feelings.

Finally, they break apart, their lips still lingering just millimeters away. Their breaths come in ragged gasps, their eyes locked in a heated gaze filled with a mixture of surprise and bliss.

A soft, love-drunk smile tugs at Y/N's lips, and she brushes her thumb against his cheek, feeling the warmth of his skin beneath her touch. Hotch's fingers continue to caress her back, his touch a silent affirmation of his feelings.

"Wow," Y/N breathes, her voice barely above a whisper, her heart still racing from the intensity of their kiss.

Hotch chuckles softly, his forehead resting against hers. "Yeah, wow," he replies, his voice filled with a mixture of wonder and contentment.

Their smiles mirror each other's, and in that moment, they both realize that this is just the beginning of their journey together. The walls that once kept their feelings hidden have crumbled, replaced by a newfound connection that's deeper and more meaningful.

As they stand there, breathless and gazing into each other's eyes, they know that they're embarking on a path of honesty, vulnerability, and love. And with their lips still tingling from their kiss, they share a quiet understanding that whatever challenges lie ahead, they'll face them together.

[russellsppttemplates]

Just imagined Tilly with one of those kid glasses that are colorful (u never said she wears glasses, but I just imagined her like that)and one huge huge matching bow in her head being all cute while watching lando streaming!🥹

"We have a special guest today with us, don't we?", Lando said into the stream as Max nodded along, already knowing who was joining his best friend on the other side of his own screen.

Matilda sat on Lando's lap and looked at the screen, now able to read the chat going off properly, "we're just going to warn you guys to keep your messages appropriate for Tilly, okay? It's a big request and we would appreciate it!", Lando said as he watched his daughter trying to catch up with the words on the screen.

"They're going too fast, daddy", she noted, looking up at him and then seeing Max, "Hi uncle Max!".

"Hello, little one! How have you been? There's something different about you though", he exaggerated, quizzically looking as Lando urged your daughter to come closer to the camera. "Is it your dress? No, I think I've seen this one before. Maybe... Is it your hair? Did mummy take you to get a haircut, Matilda?", he smiled as the little girl looked up at Lando.

She was loving the fact that apparently Max wasn't noticing her new glasses. Since she started school, Matilda complained that she couldn't quite see the board properly, and after attempts at changing her spot in the classroom and some appointments, the optometrist suggested that wearing glasses was the best course to take. She chose the most colourful pair, much like her parents' usual colour palette, and you and Lando had picked them up yesterday.

"No, my hair is the same! But I'll give you a clue: my bow is matching!", she said as she turned her head slightly, showing how she did not get a different haircut and how the bow looked a bit like the frames she picked out.

"Oh, my, word! Matilda, you have glasses now?!", Max gasped as the little girl giggled loudly in delight, the chat going mad over the interactions as Lando smiled too.

"I did, mummy and daddy got them yesterday!", she stated.

"We did, didn't we? Chat doesn't know, but Matilda had some trouble seeing things that are far away from her, right?", Lando said, kissing her cheek with little multiple kisses as she nodded, "but it's all sorted now, so she can sit here and see everything good, right, princess?", he asked, "yes, daddy, I see very well now", she said.

"Well, we're getting on with the game then! Matilda, if your super glasses see anything we don't see and spot something important, you tell us, okay?", Max said as he loaded the game.

(Thank you for your submission ✨️)

[wandering-feather]

I’m Glad I Chose Nevermore

Larissa Weems X Fem Reader

No minors!

Warnings: Smut. Oral and fingering. Angst. Comfort.

You arrived at Nermore as the Vice Principal. You had so much hope for the new job. But the Principal of Nevermore wants nothing to do with you.

Enemies to Lovers

Sitting at your desk in your office you frown at the email that you just received from the School Board of Nevermore. You have been the Vice Principal at Nevermore for 6 months and you're already getting in trouble. Not that it was entirely your fault. It all started when you applied for a teaching position at Nevermore. You wanted to get away from the city and decided to turn over a job at a prestigious school in New York City to teach students who you believed you could truly help. The board who gets the applications first decided to contact you directly and not pass the application to the Principal. With your experience they asked if you would be interested in a new position they were creating; the Vice Principal. They explained how the past year many things happened and that it would help the school out. You decided to accept the offer because again you believed you would be helping.

How wrong you were. The board had surprised the Principal, Larissa Weems just a few days before you were to arrive that you would be the new Vice Principal. You could remember your first time meeting her. You could tell she was tense and didn't like you. She didn’t even try to hide it. You knew she did not want you there. You also couldn’t help but see how beautiful she was. You could get lost in her eyes. When she stood you were blown away by her height, her long legs, and her figure. You had to quickly distract yourself from staring at her. You were pretty sure she saw though. She had shown you your office and quarters, handed you the keys and disappeared. That was most likely the longest conversation you ever had. At first you were so naive and thought with time she would come around. That was not the case though if anything it was getting worse.

You were always given meaningless work by her. Many binders of past budgets, curriculum, and whatever else Principal Weems could find littered your office. You felt that you never got anytime with students. Any of your ideas she would instantly shut down. You knew she was not going to stop until you quit. You began to feel hatred towards the woman which confused you because even when she was yelling at you, you couldn't help but to just want to kiss her bright red lips. It was the last straw of your already strained working relationship when she had offered to let you lead the next staff meeting. You thought maybe that things were finally moving the right direction. You prepped the material she gave you and was ready to finally show what you are capable of. However, you quickly learned she had tricked you and she gave you outdated information. You bit your bottom lip so hard as she explained in front of everyone that you should be better prepared for a meeting that she asked you to do over a week ago. You were humiliated, you were done and there was so much tension in the room that you could cut it with a knife.

Now staring at the email explaining that the board has heard of tension between you and Principal Weems. It went on to explain that there was an important meeting where she gave you a chance to show yourself and was not prepared. They were worried that you might not be working out with the current staff and causing issues. They were giving you 90 days to learn how to work with the staff at Nevermore or else they were going to find someone else. You took a deep breath and slammed your computer shut. Standing up you walk quickly out of your office to find the real root of the issue and you find yourself in front of the Principal’s office. You thought about just storming in but that would be unprofessional and get you nowhere. You knocked on the door maybe a little harder then you meant you heard the soft come in.

When you entered the office you saw her smile completely disappear.

“Can I help you, Vice Principal?” She asked, tilting her head.

“Principal Weems, you know why I am here. I’m sure the board has contacted you about me not getting along well at the school.” You crossed your arms over your chest. “I wouldn’t be surprised if it was you who contacted them”

You saw her smile, she wasn’t even going to deny it. You mentally kick yourself when you think about how you wanted to kiss her.

“It’s my job to look out for the students and this school and if I see an issue I try to fix it.” She was so smug.

“An issue you're causing.” You uncross your arms as she stands up and comes to stand in front of you.

“I would be very careful what you say next.” She sneers in your face.

You take a step back and shake your head. “No I’m done with being treated like someone who is doing something wrong. You have blocked me every time I tried to do something. You won’t even give me the chance to be something good for this school.” You could hear your voice getting louder.

“Maybe that’s because you are not needed here.” She simply said, turning her back to you looking towards the fire. You can see her facade dropping a little.

“I applied for a teaching job and they contacted me about this job. I was hesitant. I never planned to be in administration. I’m not here to take your job. We could have been good colleagues, maybe even friends.” You couldn’t help but think about maybe even more than friends.

Larissa stepped from the fire back in front of you, “you think I would want to be your friend?” She laughed in your face.

You were stunned you couldn’t speak. You didn’t understand how she could be so hateful with you. You watch her with her students and others. She’s so nice and so caring with them. It’s why you know she doesn’t mean these things. Or at least you hope she doesn’t. She’s just scared you're going to take her job.

“You are just miserable and lonely and want to make me feel that way also.” You didn’t mean it. But the words slipped out. You saw the look in her eyes. It was not just anger but hurt. She believed the words you said. You felt bad. This is not how you wanted it to go.

“Get out.” You were frozen in your spot. You knew you messed up.

“I’m sorry I didn’t…”

“Now” you jumped at the louder volume in her voice.

You quickly turned and excited her office. You felt your eyes begin to sting. You knew you shouldn’t have said that. You also knew that she was wrong with what she said. But the look in her eyes she truly believed what you said. You had to fix this. You walked towards your quarters and shut the door. The tears fell as you slid down the door. You should have just stayed in the city.

***

It has now been a month since your argument with Principal Weems. She only spoke to you when she had to. She also didn’t give you any meaningless work but she also didn’t give you anything to do. So you decided to take time and get to know the students. You talked to them, listened to their complaints and what they would see better for the school. You hated what you said to Principal Weems. You couldn’t help but notice she had withdrawn herself some. Today you set up a volleyball net you ordered to get some students outside for a beautiful day. Today was a perfect day with no classes and beautiful weather. You were teaching Enid how to serve and get it over the net when you looked up to see Larissa looking down at you. You could have sworn you saw a smile but now she had a stern look on her face. You couldn't look away. She looked so sad. You said something to her that she truly believed was true. You knew she was wrong for the way she treated you. But it seemed a fact that she was insecure and she felt threatened. You watch as she turns around and heads back into her office and a volleyball hits you in the head.

“I’m so sorry, Vice Principal.” Enid looked at you with scared eyes.

“Don’t worry about it Enid I wasn’t paying attention. Why don’t you all play for now. I have something I need to do.” You waved at them and headed to your quarters.

You showered and changed into some comfortable clothes. You headed to Principal Weems office and knocked. You heard the soft voice telling you to come in. You stepped into her office and found her in front of the fire sitting and sipping on wine.

“Oh it’s you. I thought you were out playing with the students.” She smirked at you.

“I was but I thought it would be time to apologize for what I said a while ago. I should have never said it.” You sighed seeing her take a sip of her wine not looking at you.

“Why apologize, you were only telling the truth.” Her voice sounded so broken. You hated seeing her like this no matter how you have been treated.

“That’s not true, I was upset. I just wanted to be useful for this school to help you. To help these students. I’m not your enemy Larissa.” You didn’t mean to let her first name slip. But sighed with relief when she just looked at you and shrugged.

“Well I don’t need any help. The school was just fine before you showed up.” She said taking a sip again.

“I’m sure it was.” You walked and stood in front of her. “I meant what I said. I don’t want to take your job away from you. I just want to help. I would like to be your friend. You don’t have to feel lonely.”

Larrisa didn’t say anything. This past month she has seen you in a new light. The way you were with the students. You took time to listen to them. To make sure they are okay. She knew what you were saying was true. She stood up and you took a step back. You swallowed. You knew you crossed a line.

“I’m sorry I…” before you could finish your sentence Larissa leaned down and crashed her lips against yours. The kiss was sloppy and needy and you moaned into the kiss and gripped at her waist. She pulled back and you wimpred at the loss of touch. Before she could say anything you pushed her back in the chair and climbed into her lap straddling her and kissed her lips. She was surprised at first but wrapped her arms around your waist pulling you closer. You pulled back gasping for air looking into her eyes asking if she was okay with this. Her lips crashed against yours again as she licked your lips. You granted her access and you couldn’t help but buck your hips against hers. You felt her moan into the kiss and you knew you wanted to show her and give her attention. You pulled back and slid off the chair to your knees.

“Larissa I’m going to help you feel good.” You ran your hands up her creamy thighs pushing her dress up to around her waist. You could see her soaking in lacy underwear and smiling at her. You were giving her one last chance to tell you no. To push you away. When she lifted up some you took that as an okay and you hooked your fingers in her underwear sliding them down. You kissed on her thighs as you tossed the underwear to the side.

You looked up at her through hooded eyes. “Just relax Larissa, I got you.”

She nodded and you ran your tongue along her slit. You couldn’t help but moan against her mound at hearing her moan. You circled your tongue along her clit pressing pressure and sucking at the sensitive spot. You listened to her moans to guide you to what she wanted.

“Oh god yes right there don’t stop.” She panted out grabbing your hair pressing you closer to her. You wanted to give her more and slid two fingers inside her curling them. You could feel her thighs tighten around your head and you move your fingers faster. She was trying to muffle her moans as you sucked harder on her clit.

“I’m so close. Yes, just like that.” She cried out bucking her hip lightly against your face.

You looked up at her and pulled back still pumping your fingers. “Just let go Larissa.” You went back to giving attention to her clit. You didn’t want to take your eyes off of her. She was so beautiful right now. You could feel her clinch around your fingers as she cried out orgasiming. You lapped up her cum and slid your fingers out. Looking up at her you sucked your fingers cleaning her off them. She just looked at you with her mouth slightly opened trying to catch her breath.

“Do you feel better?” You asked standing up.

Larissa pushed her dress down. “Yes thank you.”

You smiled down at her sitting there and you wanted to reach out and touch her cheek but that was too intimate.

“It’s okay to let go of control sometimes.” You felt a little shy all of sudden. You wanted this to be about her but you needed to touch yourself to relieve yourself.

“Goodnight Larissa.” You said leaving her office.

You walked back to your room and closed the door. You don’t know if you made things worse. You didn’t know what tomorrow would hold. But you enjoyed pleasuring Larissa. You wanted more and you hoped she did too. That night you laid in bed and touched yourself with the same fingers you had inside Larissa moaning her name.

***

Things ended up being a lot better between the two of you after that. You guys spent time together drinking wine in each other's offices. Most times it led to sex. It was rough and needy and felt amazing. You guys got to know each other and became friends. You wanted more but you felt she didn’t. Your 90 day review came and went and you still had your job. You felt like you were doing good for the school.

You were back in your own quarters after spending the evening with Larissa in her office. You could still feel her long fingers pumping inside you hard while she had you bent over her desk. It felt great but it also felt like it was missing something. You wanted to be touched and feel loved. You wanted something more than just sex. You wanted it to be more than just that. You wanted it to be more with Larissa. You felt the tears falling down your cheeks. You knew you had fallen in love with her. You knew when she apologized for how she treated you when you first arrived at Nevermore. However you were just a friend to her. Someone she could use for relaxation. It was just sex for her. You were torn. You needed to stop it for your own good but you didn’t think you could. You would take what you got.

The next night you were in her office as she poured you both a glass of wine. She sat down on the couch next to you handing you yours. She could tell something was wrong, you were quiet and reserved.

“Darling, are you going to tell me what’s got you so quiet tonight?” She asked, placing her hand on your thigh. She could feel you tense and pulled her hand back really concerned now.

“I’m sorry Larissa I guess I’m tired.” You lied. You knew she would see right through you.

“It seems to be more than that. We are friends, you can talk to me.” She said looking at you with concern in her eyes.

You couldn’t lie to her. You had to tell her. “Larissa, am I just sex to you?” You didn’t mean to come out so bluntly.

Larrisa looks at you confused, “no we are friends too. I thought I made that clear.”

You sighed and shook your head, “ no I get that but when we have sex…” you decided to just get to the point. “Larissa I know saying this could ruin everything but I have feelings for you. Feelings that’s beyond friendship. I…. I love you.” You couldn’t look at her, you knew you just messed it all up.

Larrisa just looked at you for a few seconds. “Darling, please look at me.”

You looked up at her and you didn’t see anger in her eyes. “I’m sorry I shouldn’t have said anything.”

Larissa looked in your eyes and could see the vulnerability in them. You were telling her how you feel laying it on the table. There was no doubt in your eyes. She never thought anyone would look at her like that. She had put up walls to not let her feel that way towards anyone. These past few months you helped build her up to become a stronger person and tear those walls down. You never doubted her even after the way she treated you. Here you sat in front of her, baring your soul and she felt her own heart swell.

“Come here.” She pulled you onto her lap and you straddled her. She ran her finger along your cheek. “Darling it’s more than sex. Let me show you.”

She stood up as you wrapped your legs around her waist and she carried you into her quarters. You had never been here before. You let her kiss you as she made it to her bed and laid you down gently. You looked up at her. Larissa climbed in the bed and on top of you. She kept kissing you and let her hands roam your body. You were lost in her touch and the way she was looking at you. She slowly undressed you, taking her time kissing on your skin. It took longer for you to lay naked underneath her as she let her hands roam your body.

You whimpered when she pulled away. “Patients my darling.”

You watched her as she began to undress herself. She wouldn’t let you help. You then watched as she took her hair down. You have never seen her hair down before she looked like an angel as her curls fell down her back. You reached for her as her lips crashed against yours and her naked skin was flushed up against yours. You have never felt this close to anyone. You spread your legs letting her lay in between them. You could feel her so close. You wanted this for so long. She kissed along your jaw moving her hand down your stomach and above your folds she slid a finger in between them smiling at your gasp. You close your eyes arching your back pressing yourself against her.

“Darling, open your eyes, please look at me.” She smiled when you opened your eyes.

“Larissa, please I need you.” You begged, finally getting your voice.

Larissa smiled again and slid two fingers inside you and moved them slowly. “Keep your eyes on me darling and listen to me.” She kissed your lips as you moaned and nodded.

“You are way more than just sex,” she spoke moving her fingers, “you have made me feel things I never thought I could.” She pressed her palm against your clit, smiling at you as you moaned. “I love you too.”

Your eyes keep looking at hers as she kisses you passionately. “I love you so much. You have made it possible for me to love.”

Her confession pushed you over the edge and you felt your whole body tremble underneath her as you came gripping at her shoulders. “Oh god Larissa, don't stop.” You needed more of her. You couldn’t get enough. You felt her fingers slide out of you and you whimpered as she put them in her mouth.

“You taste amazing.” You almost came again with her words. She began to kiss down your neck taking her time at your chest. She left open kisses along your stomach. You couldn’t keep your eyes off of her. She began to kiss on your thighs. Your breath caught in your chest as she buried herself in between your legs. She sucked on your clit before running her tongue down your slit and slid her tongue inside you. You put your hand in her hair moaning her name.

“Larissa oh god yes right there.” You arch your back catching her eyes. You could see the love. You were loved back by her and again you felt yourself being pushed over the edge. You kept your eyes on her and she licked you clean of your release. She kissed back up your body and kissed you passionately as you wrapped your arms around her neck.

“Do you still think it’s just sex darling?” She asked, smiling at you, moving some hair out of your face.

“No Larissa, that was amazing. I love you.” You smiled up at her still breathing heavily. Never in a million years did you think this is where you two would be when you first arrived at Nevermore.

Larissa smiles at you and pulls back pulling you into her arms as she laid back. You laid your head on her chest. “You want me to stay?” You asked.

“Of course.” She smiled down at you and you reached up kissing her lips.

“I’m glad I chose Nevermore.” You said as you felt her pull you closer.

“Me too darling.” She ran her fingers along your bare back as your eyes drifted close. She was thankful you didn’t give up on her, that you truly loved her for who she was. She closed her eyes, keeping a hold of you with never planning on letting you go.

[strangersteddierthings]

I love a good S3 Steddie AU so—

Eddie and Robin were friends in high school, and every time they needed cover they would pretend to be dating.

So she starts working at Scoops, sees Steve not knowing he’s different now, and as a defense mechanism tells him about her “boyfriend”

Then they become buds but she still doesn’t correct the record, because she would have to explain why she lied

So Eddie comes into the shop and she’s like “That’s him!” and Steve is “🥺”

Because he and Eddie have been dating for months

THE SCREAM I SCRUMPT AT THAT LAST LINE NONNY. This story starts on July 1st (S3E3), so after they've cracked the Russian code.

-

It takes a full month of working at Scoops to get Robin to be more chill around him. He gets it. He was never outright mean to her but he was a dick in high school and his reputation lingers.

He's happy now that she's graduated from quietly distrusting him to outright teasing him. He's pretty sure it means they're friends now, or something like it. She even made that white board to mock his inability to flirt a few weeks ago. He knows he'll never get a tally in the You Rule category because he's not actually trying to flirt with anyone, what with him having a boyfriend of his own. Not that he can brag about his boyfriend as much as Robin brags about her boyfriend.

And, Jesus, did she brag at first. Steve had been convinced it was a new romance, and therefore she was still in the honeymoon phase, except she said they'd been dating since she was a freshman. With senior year starting for her in September, Steve's a little jealous.

He hopes that he and Eddie never leave their honeymoon phase. It's only been three months, and Steve's in awe that Eddie even bothered to look his way after how he'd been in school. Still in awe that Eddie wants more with Steve than just the physical. That Eddie wants cuddles during a movie, and sappy hand holding while they just chat, and to hold Steve after a nightmare on the rare occasion they get to share a bed through the night.

Anyway, the point. Robin is something of a friend and Steve's pleased about it. They have to be friends now, right? They cracked a Russian code together! (Steve refuses to give Dustin any credit for their official jump into friendship even though they wouldn't have had a Russian code to crack without him.)

"Are you and the Boy going to do anything for the Fourth?" Steve asks apropos nothing after handing off a banana split, leaving no more customers to help currently. He's a little ashamed to admit that he doesn't remember the name of her boyfriend. He's sure she said it at some point, so he's blaming his shit memory for that. But she just refers to him as the Boy, and doesn't find it weird that Steve does, too, so he'll take the win.

"Oh, uh, we haven't really discussed it. I'm scheduled closing on the Fourth so," Robin shrugs.

"We'll be in misery together," Steve says.

"Joy."

It's times like these, where Robin is so deadpan Steve can't tell if she's joking or not. Like maybe they aren't the budding friends Steve thinks they are. She's tough to read, sometimes.

"Well, even with the closing shift, there's still a lot of night left. Great time for fireworks."

"True. I'm sure The Boy is thinking up something as we speak. He likes to surprise me."

Steve's not jealous. He's not. He knows that Eddie would surprise him if they didn't have to be so secret about it all.

They do have plans for after Steve gets off work on the Fourth to go to the carnival. It's not strange for friends to go together. Maybe Steve can convince Robin come and to bring the Boy and they can just be a group of friends hanging out?

"Well, if he hasn't planned anything, maybe you and he will want to come hang out at the carnival? I'm going with a friend, maybe we'd see each other."

Robin levels him with a look, eyes squinted in judgement. "Your friends, the children?"

"I have more friends than just children!"

"I literally do not believe you. Why don't any of your age appropriate friends come bother you here, like all those kids?"

It's a valid question, Steve can concede. "That's because I do not want him to see me in this uniform. I will never live it down."

Robin raises an eyebrow. "Does he even know you work here?"

"Absolutely not. So if you do bump into us at the carnival, you are not allowed to say our place of employment. I'm serious, Robin. This will ruin me. You can say 'the mall' because that's all I'll say about it."

Robin's grin turns mischievous. "So, what I'm hearing is, I have blackmail material against the Steve Harrington?"

Steve groans. She's joking. He's like... 80% sure she's joking. He makes a mental note to ask Eddie if he knows Robin.

"Oh shit!" Robin calls out, surprised but delighted. Steve whips his head to her, and sees she's looking out the front door and through a sea of people.

"What, is it Dustin? Russians?" Steve joins her side quickly trying to see what she sees.

"No, it's-" she cuts herself off and Steve turns his head to look at her, only to find she's already looking at him. "It's my boyfriend. I don't think he's seen me yet. Want to meet him if he comes in?"

"Hell yeah I do. I need to meet the man you won't shut up about," Steve grins at her before turning his attention back to the people. His eyes scan over all of them, trying to figure out which guy looks like he might be Robin's boyfriend. Which, yes, he knows isn't something you can judge based on looks (he and Eddie are a prime example) but still.

And speaking of Eddie- no! No no! He'll never hear the end of it if Eddie sees the stupid sailor outfit. Eddie hasn't spotted him yet, so Steve slides around Robin to be out of eyesight. "You see him?"

"Yeah, he's- oh! I think he's seen me. He's coming this way," almost as an after thought, she adds, "do you remember Eddie Munson?"

Play it cool, Steve. "Uh... yes. Why? Is he coming this way? I thought I saw him out there..." Way to play it cool. If Robin didn't seem so hyped to be seeing her boyfriend, she would absolutely be questioning him.

"Oh. Well, he's my boyfriend, and yes he is."

Steve feels the floor fall out from under him.

The whole world shifts and Steve cannot stay here. He thinks he says something about a bathroom break before ducking into the employees only door, and then his body moves him further still until he's through several other doors and suddenly outside in the heat of the day.

Do you remember Eddie Munson? Well, he's my boyfriend.

He doesn't know what to do with that. Doesn't know how to process it. How to proceed. Eddie is- but he can't- this can't be real. This is a crazy dream, brought on by thoughts of Russians and codes and leftover Upside Down bullshit and he will be waking up anytime now to get ready for work.

Eddie Munson. He's my boyfriend.

He can't be your boyfriend Steve wants to scream. He can't be your boyfriend because he's mine.

Maybe... Maybe it's turning out to be that while Eddie is his boyfriend, he's not Eddie's. Maybe Eddie's never thought of him as a boyfriend.

Every instance runs through his head; all the times Eddie wouldn't stay the night. All the times Eddie told him he couldn't stay at the trailer. Is Eddie actually even in a band or is band practice just a convenient lie that keeps him from having to see Steve while still keeping him in his back pocket?

All the hiding, and the let's keep this just to us for now, and how wonderfully convenient it is that this needs to, has to, be a secret when you're in a queer relationship in a small town.

Steve's a goddman idiot!

Of course, Eddie has a girlfriend. Of course, he agreed to 'see where this thing goes.' This is why Eddie bothered to even look his direction. Because there's no scenario where Steve comes out okay. He can't even tell Robin her boyfriend isn't the fucking golden, perfect boy she brags about because how does he do that without telling her how he knows?

All the worst case scenarios play in his mind. Robin being in on it. Her and Eddie laughing at him behind his back, waiting for the right time to publicly out him. To get whatever revenge they think he owes to them for all his dick behavior in school. His whole relationship being a joke.

He lets out a yell and whips around to punch the wall next to the employee entrance door. The pain grounds him almost immediately and that yell turns into a chokes off sob, his eyes squeezing shut as he leans in to rest his forehead against the wall and take a shuddering breath.

There's no way Robin is in on this. And it was mean of him to think so. If Steve's just been some sort of experiment to Eddie, then that's on Eddie.

And Steve. For being stupid enough to believe anyone would actually be interested in him. For taking one look at Eddie's stupid dimpled smile and tripping over himself to do everything in his power to see it again. For fucking falling in love too fast, too soon, and not asking enough fucking questions and-

Oh.

That's why this hurts so much. That's why he didn't stick around to watch Eddie sweat at seeing his long-term girlfriend and- and whatever the fuck he thought Steve was working together and getting caught in whatever fuckery he's doing.

Steve's gone a fallen in love with the asshole.

He pushes off the wall, takes a deep breath to steel himself, and makes a decision. He's going to confront Eddie on the Fourth, since that's the next day they'll see each other. He'll tell him they're done, and that Eddie needs to come clean to Robin about what he's done, or he will. She deserves to know, and Steve can deal with the consequences.

When he returns the Scoops, there's no sign of Eddie, but Dustin is there.

(What Steve doesn't know is that Robin and Eddie hugged in greeting. Robin asked what he was up to. Eddie told her he was searching for his boyfriend. He works at the mall and Eddie wants to surprise him. Robin doesn't ask who he's looking for, and Eddie doesn't offer, because they both know the importance of coming out on your own terms and in your own time. Robin does ask if he's happy, and Eddie says he didn't know he could be this happy.)

Of course, what follows that is a series of terrible events that result in being stuck in an elevator, captured and tortured by Russians, drugged, and then rescued.

He and Robin end up in a bathroom, puking up their guts, and Robin says, in a Russian accent, "Interrogate me."

Steve chuckles and replies, "Okay. Interrogate you. Sure. Um... when was the last time you peed your pants?"

"Today."

"What?"

"When the Russian doctor took out the bone saw. It was just a little bit, though."

She laughs and he groans. It's definitely still in her system.

"Okay. My turn."

"Hit me."

"Have you..." she starts, leaving a pause as she thinks of what to ask, before ending with, "ever been in love?"

And Steve, horrifyingly, mortifyingly, just starts to cry. He can normally reign this in, has better control than this, but whatever drug is still in his system robs him of that.

In another universe, where Steve is able to control himself, he'd lie. He'd describe Robin, knowing she's happily taken, maybe slide himself under the partition between their stalls so she can reject him to his face, and they can laugh it off, solidifying their friendship.

But that's not what happens.

What happens instead is this: Robin, who does not slide herself across the floor but instead hauls herself upright to stumble around the partition, kneels in front of him as Steve lets out hiccupping sobs in between saying embarrassing things like yes and they don't love me back, they never love me back.

And Robin. Sweet, wonderful Robin, to whom he has been the other person in her years long relationship, tugs his arm until he's no longer hugging the toilet and is instead cradled by Robin. And she hums and assures him that whoever doesn't love him is an idiot and it makes Steve sob harder because she doesn't know and when she learns she's going to hate him.

He cannot let her continue to comfort him while he's crying about her boyfriend. It is with that sobering thought that he's able to win his war against whatever he's been injected with and stop his tears. Just in time, too, because Dustin and Erica find them, and then the Russians do, but so does El and the others.

The world is nothing but Upside Down terror for hours.

When the dust settles, Hopper is dead, and so is Billy, and Steve is sat in the back of an ambulance, hugging Robin around her shoulders as they both look out into the parking lot with matching thousand-yard stares. They've been looked over and deemed okay to go home, so Steve is just waiting for the government men currently raiding what is left of the underground Russain bunker to either find his keys, or not.

If his keys are found, he's Robin's ride. If they aren't, they're both being dropped off by ambulance, which Robin is stressing about because her parents cannot see her come home in the back of an ambulance.

Steve offers her to stay at his house. He thinks it'll be easier to beg her parents for forgiveness than explain this situation. Robin agrees to stay if the ambulance ends up being their ride.

It doesn't, though. It takes an hour after everyone else has left, but someone delivers his keys.

It's eerie, the walk from the front lot around the mall to the back employee lot, so they clasp hands to have something to ground to. There are less people the further they walk. The fire's been contained, probably so the government people can root around the bunker below the mall to discover whatever it was the Russians knew, or know, or whatever.

The back lot is completely empty. Only Steve's car, parked towards the edge of the lot give that his shift yesterday had been an afternoon one, and all the closer parking spaces had been taken.

His car is parked so that the passenger side faces them as they approach. Wordlessly, they break apart, Robin heading for her door and Steve rounding the front of the car to get to the driver's side. Except as soon as he rounds the corner, a figure that was previously crouched or sat in front of the door jumps up, lunging at Steve.

He barely has time to register the voice, a terrified sounding "Stevie!" before Steve back tracks with a yelp, out of reach of the figure. Robin screams when he does, and whoever was lunging at him stops in their tracks, whipping around to look at the other source of the noise.

"Robin?"

It's then that Steve takes in the sight before him. It's Eddie. It was Eddie leaning against his door, waiting for him. Steve's flooded with a rush of love, his stupid brain deciding that Eddie must have been worried when Steve didn't meet him for the carnival. Had come to look for him. But then the reality of the situation settles over him.

That might have been true, but now he's seen that Steve is here with his girlfriend and this isn't how he wanted to do this but he will.

For Robin, he will. She deserves better.

"What are you doing here!? Besides scaring the shit out of us!" Robin yells, rounding the car to punch Eddie in the arm.

"Ow, Buckley, what the fuck!" Eddie rubs the spot she punched him, looking between Robin and Steve with... confusion? Steve is expecting to see maybe some remorse, or guilt, or maybe even glee at the fact stupid Steve Harrington was able to be so easily fooled. He doesn't see any of that, though.

Eddie takes a step towards him, and Steve flinches back.

Robin steps up to Eddie, like she wants to pull Eddie into a hug, but he stops her with a hand on her shoulder. He looks from Robin to Steve again, then back to Robin. Steve can't see his face, his hair hides his profile, but he can see Robin's face. Her confusion, brows furrowed, before her eyes go wide and now she's looking between Steve and Eddie.

Fuck. She's just put it together herself! She's going to hate Steve forever, homewreaker that he is.

"Oh. Oh no," Robin whispers, then says Eddie's name in a devastated tone. "Eddie. Is it-?"

"I-I can't... Robin," Eddie says back, sounding just as hurt.

"No! No, I told him- Eddie, I told him we were dating!" she turns to Steve, then, and blurts, "I'm a lesbian!"

He doesn't know what to do with that information. "What?"

"I lied. Steve, I lied, I'm a lying liar and I'm so sorry," Robin says, shoving Eddie away from herself and towards Steve.

Maybe the drugs are still working because Steve still doesn't understand. "I don't... what?"

"I'm not dating Eddie," Robin says. "I've never dated Eddie, would never date Eddie because I don't want to date boys. Please, Steve, I never meant to make you think-" but she cuts herself off, looking from Steve to Eddie and back, before saying, "I never meant to make you think you were unlovable."

Eddie makes a wounded noise at that. "What did you say to him, Buckley!?"

Robin lied. Robin lied about dating a boy. Because she's not interested in boys? That doesn't make sense. That- oh. She lied about having a boyfriend for the same reason he's lied about not having a boyfriend. Because it isn't safe to not to.

Steve's legs give out, but he doesn't hit the pavement because Eddie catches him and the three of them sob and cling to each other in the dark of the parking lot.

Later, much later, the truth will come out. Steve will learn they've always been each other's covers but never actually together. Robin will apologize because she blames herself for Steve's bathroom, drugged-breakdown, and Steve apologizes for all the awful thoughts he had about Eddie when he thought Eddie was dating them both and lying about it.

Steve will learn that Eddie loves him, too, just as much as Steve loves him.

[mayfieldss]

If only you knew, I can see you - Carmen Berzatto

Content Warnings; language, sexual innuendos, small fights, the not-so-subtle Taylor Swift lyrics. Mentions of blood / minor injuries, and Carmy shouting his lungs out.

Summary: [ requested by @diorrfairy ]- hi! i'd like to ask a one shot on Carmy where him and the reader are secretly in love with each other. she particularly gets turned on when he's screaming in the kitchen, giving out orders and being bossy. and even though she doesn't know, he's noticed the way she looks at him when he's like that.

AN; I was so excited to write this concept, so thank you for sending it in. Also, I need him carnally. (I am so sorry about the end, I went kind of feral, and I feel as though I need to apologise)

Carmy had never been in love before, and honestly, he didn't know how he was supposed to tell what love was when around someone like you. But he knew that he liked you more than words could describe, and he knew that it was impossible for you to feel anything near the same. But somehow, he'd caught wind of something that might indicate otherwise.

Mid-day, on Tuesday. It had yet to reach the middle of the week, and the restaurant was packed to the brim for a reason unbeknownst to Carmy. He couldn't quite believe it, the stacks of people piling out the door to get a sandwich of all things. But Carmy was determined to serve every one of them because business was good, and he couldn't afford to turn a single customer away.

This idea, however, this impossible task set before every chef to serve every person, had its downfalls.

"Where the fuck is Marcus?" Carmy is moving fast, faster than he thinks he's ever moved in a kitchen of this size, shifting from station to station. "Where are the fuckin' cakes?"

He's being loud and not particularly nice, but Carmy can't afford nice right now. Not until the customers outside get what they ordered.

"Chef!" Carmy shouts your way, "Where the fuck are the onions?" His brows are raised in expectancy, and he stands waiting for your reply.

"Tina is on onions, Chef." You wave to her as you shift past Sydney and Carmen finds himself rushing over to your station.

"Behind, behind, god dammit, fucking behind!" The continuous shouts of the word fall from him as he moves past Richie and Ebra, headed straight for you.

"You got the peppers?" He asks, leaning over your shoulder, his breath brushing against your ear as he does so. He watches your shoulder shift, glancing at the chopping board that so clearly holds what he needs. He nods to you, "Good." And then he takes them away, whisking them off to a pot across the kitchen, despite the one by your side.

That was the first time Carmy noticed it. The way you looked at him differently. You didn't seem scared of his shouting, though, he couldn't be sure, but he thought there was something else behind your eyes. Something similar to how he would secretly look at you when he knew you couldn't catch him. So, weeks later, when the same situation occurs, a different day with different yet similar stakes, Carmy takes note of your reactions.

"We're moving too fucking slow, c'mon Chefs, move it. Now!" He hates to yell at them, but really, he's got no other choice than to raise his voice in the kitchen because, in truth, everyone else is being just as loud.

"Fuck!" His shout is deafening as he moves through the kitchen "Three more beef all-day chefs!"

Everyone in the kitchen choruses back to him, and he's grateful for the fact that they are at least listening to the important parts, but still, the stress keeps gathering inside of him like water filling his lungs. "Richie! What the fuck are you doing?" the man is standing with the freezer door open, looking inside as if he's a child at the fridge. Richie turns when he hears Carmy call him though, shrugging his shoulders.

"Hate to break it to you cousin, but the freezer ain't freezing shit."

That's Carmy's last straw, and suddenly the panic is spilling out of his mouth in a chorus of curses and orders. "Richie, bring out all the meat. All of it, and somebody call fucking Fak!" He takes a breath, snatching up a crate of vegetables as he moves. "Please." He adds, though his tone is still just as sharp.

And that's when he sees it, sees you out of the corner of his eye. You're watching him as you stir a pot at your station, and it seems as though you're holding your breath. Holding your breath just like he holds his own when he sees you. And for a split second, in the middle of his anger, he thinks he might have a chance. But then you exhale and go back to your work as if you hadn't been eyeing him up at all.

But he noticed. He knows what he saw. He's sure of it, isn't he?

He's right of course. You're just as infatuated with him as he is with you, but he can't ever know it. He's your boss after all and a relationship with him? Well, that would end more than messy. And yet you can't help but watch him, the way his hands and arms flex as he works. The way the veins in his neck show themselves as he shouts, voice booming—and if you dare to say it—hot.

He can't notice, and you don't think that he does.

The day continues the way it started, stressful and intense and when Fak finally arrives to fix the freezer Carmy has to resist the urge to give Richie an earful as the man stands talking to him, wasting time. But Richie doesn't shut up, and Carmy doesn't think it's actually possible for him to do so, and with each word that leaves his lips, he prevents Fak from getting to work on the broken freezer.

"Richie!" He yells from his station, "Please, for the benefit of everyone here, shut the fuck up!" His voice is strong, deep and when Richie ignores him it only makes things worse. "Cousin, I swear to god—"

"What're you gonna do Carmy? What are you gonna do? Because by the looks of it, you're too caught up in your fancy sauces to fuck with me right now!" Richie belts the words back, and it's a warzone suddenly as the two battle it out with words. Carmy has moved on to serving, organising each ingredient into its respective sandwich with you at his side, sliding freshly cut ingredients his way.

"Believe it or not Cousin, you don't own this place. I do, and I will kick your ass out of it if you don't be fucking quiet!"

Carmy can feel his face flush with anger, but what's more, is that he can see the red in your own cheeks. The nervous shuffling as you slide over a bowl of beef, trying not to make eye contact. But Carmy dares you to, and he keeps his eyes on you for one second, then two, until you look up, and he can see it. The large gulp as your eyes meet his, the way you bite the inside of your cheek, almost subtle enough for him not to see. He looks away but wants to push things further, he wants to test his theory without being too obvious. So, he brushes past you, a hand on the small of your back as he does. "Behind." He mutters, and the action is so simple, so common that he knows it shouldn't mean anything unless of course, his theory is right.

He witnesses your breath catch at his touch, and your quiet yet long exhale when his hand leaves your body, and somehow, he just knows. He hopes he's not reading into it; he hopes it's true because he wants you just as badly if it is. He might be in love with you, though he's never said such a thing, and God he hopes that there's something there.

"You alright, Chef?" he turns back to you once he's grabbed what he needed, still in a rush as he plays this chess game. You nod and Carmy sees it again, the harsh swallow as your nerves pick up. He catches you then, gaze falling to his hands as they move and he didn't take you for the kind of person to acknowledge such things, but he's seeing it all now.

Before Carmy can say anything, Richie speeds past, ignoring almost every rule of the kitchen as he does. The man's arm knocks into you, pushing you forward and Carmy watches first-hand as the knife you were using to chop up ingredients slices against the palm of your hand. You hiss out in pain, and instantly Carmy is on Richie like a guard dog.

"Cousin, what the fuck?" Carmy pushes him back, snatching at a roll of paper towels to clean the blood in the split second it takes Richie to respond.

"Hey Carm, chill out, will you?" The man raises his hands in defence.

"You're supposed to say 'behind' you fucking moron! Congratulations you just caused another damn casualty." Carmy glances back to you, holding your hand over the sink as the water runs red over your palm. "You know what, Cousin? Go get the first aid kit, do something for once!"

Carmy can feel the heat coursing all throughout his body, the anger moving through his veins, and somehow Richie can see that talking back is a bad idea. He moves off with little more than a grumble to get the first aid kit, and Carmy moves back to you, paper towels in hand.

"You okay, Chef?" Carmy reaches for you despite the rush of customers, taking your injured hand in his own.

"We'll hold the fort, Jeff. You go help her." It's Tina, the woman magically appearing behind him as she glances at the deep wound. It's not anything they haven't seen in the kitchen before, but still, it's a difficult fix. Carmy does as he's told and leads you to his office to patch you up, though he would have done so anyway, whether Tina had given him the go-ahead or not.

"I'm fine Carmy, really." Your voice is so gentle in comparison to all the yelling he's had to do today, and he finds that the sound of it would be so easy to sink into. He sits you down on the singular chair in the office, kneeling in front of you with another paper towel as blood starts to form again.

He wraps up your hand with it, glancing at the door. "Where the hell is Richie? The first aid kit isn't that hard to find." He looks up at you then, and you're wincing at the pressure of his hand over yours. The blood is soaking through the paper, as Carmy apologises. "I know it hurts, I'm sorry, but we gotta keep the pressure on it, Okay?"

"I know Carmy, I've had accidents like this before." You smile at him, and he can't deny his stomach flips a little.

"Yeah, sorry. I guess I can trust you to keep the pressure on it. If you want." He doesn't really want to move his hand from yours just for the sake of the contact, and when you place your uninjured hand over his own, he thinks he might have to, but you just shake your head. "It's fine Carmy, you look like you know what you're doing. World's best Chef or whatever has to know how to bandage a girl up right?"

He chuckles at that, just as Richie turns up with the first aid kit in the door. "Hey, I'm really sorry about, you know, all this." Richie gestures to your hand and goes to move closer but Carmy stops him, snatching the first aid kit from his friend's hands.

"Just fuck off, Richie. Man the register."

Richie rolls his eyes, though he leaves to do what he's told. "You don't have to be so mean about it Carm." The man responds though he's already gone by the time Carmy turns to argue again. When he looks back at you, his hand still over yours, he shakes his head.

"I'm sorry about him. I know he gives you a hard time and he doesn't pay attention to anything—" Carmy stops because he sees it again. That look in your eyes. You're watching him, gaze flitting to his arms, his hands and Carmy nods to himself, trying to hide the smile. He's figured it out, and he's more than pleased about it.

"You do know I can see you right?" He can't help it, the tone of his voice gives him all away and the smile he's hiding, though not on his face, can be heard within his words.

You play dumb though, tilting your head slightly to the side. Carmen has to admit he likes that look on you. "What?" Though you hide it well, the singular word is filled with falsified confusion and some minor panic and despite how fake your bewilderment sounds, Carmy almost thinks he's misread the situation. But then he remembers. He recalls the way you looked at him when he was screaming his head off around the kitchen, the nervous and heated shuffling when he was close to you. The catching of your breath when he touched you like any friend would.

"I might be reading this wrong but," He lets his hand graze innocently up your arm, as if checking for any other scrapes. "The way you looked at me before when I was going off at Richie," He pauses, eyes coming up to meet yours. He's shuffled himself further between your legs, still crouched low as he wipes blood from your hand. "Is there something you wanna tell me, Chef?"

To that you go beet red, stuttering with wide eyes that refuse to meet his own. "Chef, I don't know what you're talking about." You reach down to grab the first aid kit's contents yourself, but Carmy stops you, grabbing a bandage of his own as he begins to fix up your wound.

"It's all good Chef, I'm not mad, and it's just an observation but from what I've seen you seem to like it when I am."

You look over at the wall beside you, unable to keep eye contact. "Carmy, I don't want this to make things weird between us, I'll get over it, I'm sure I will."

"I don't want you to get over it." He's taking risks and he knows that well enough, but as Carmy tightens the bandages around your hand he can see the deep breath you suck in. "I can see you eyefucking me in the kitchen Chef, but I'm surprised you haven't caught on to the fact I've been doing the same to you."

You look back at him then, and he knows the way his eyes rake over your face isn't subtle in the slightest. The prolonged glance at your lips, the way his gaze trails down your jaw and back up again. You exhale, heavily and Carmy takes another chance. He lets his hands move up your arms again, and your eyes follow them as they move along your body.

"I'm gonna ask you a question Chef, and I want you to answer honestly." his eyes are the sharpest of blues as they stare into yours, and all you can do is nod.

His hands on your shoulders, the warmth of them as they run up and down your arms, is so distracting. "If I went to kiss you right now, would you let me?"

It's so surprising that it makes you laugh, a small chuckle of disbelief. Carmy hopes that's a good thing, and when you respond it's all but confirmed to him in a fire of excitement. "Absolutely."

From there it's all over, the discreet glances and gentle touches entirely abandoned for that of freedom. The friendly gazes across a room are replaced by the passionate connection of Carmy's lips on yours, his hands pulling you flush against him so fast that you almost fall off the chair. He manages to stand whilst his lips are still connected to your skin and though it's awkward, the struggle is ignored. Carmy can't believe he actually gets to kiss you, that he can really act on all the crazy things inside his head, and he's not going to waste the opportunity.

He pulls you to your feet, your hands placed firmly on his shoulders, releasing all of his tension as he realises you want him just as much. "Carmy, we have to get back to work." You mumble through the frenzy of kisses Carmy is providing. He just groans against your lips, kicking the door to the office closed without so much as looking in its direction. "The fucking restaurant can wait."

"But—" You go to speak again but Carmy kisses you back into silence.

"Work later, us now." the words come staggered as he grasps at you, his lips trailing down your jaw just like he'd imagined himself doing minutes before. You're pressed against the door, and with one hand sliding behind your back, Carmy manages to lock it. He's got time, he thinks. Time for just one more kiss, or something else.

[thatonewritersomewhere]

Cat's Game

Warnings: Fluff, dating, smut (blowjob, fingering, p in v, creampie, aftercare)

Summary: College au, aged up characters, Kirishima x fem!reader, Kirishima is somewhat of a soft dom - partners for a project becomes... something else...

Word Count: 6.2k

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"The partners for your project will be posted on the board at the beginning of tomorrow's class," Mr. Aizawa drawled in a tired voice, as usual. You wondered if he got any sleep, ever. The class collectively gathered their things and got up from their seats. 

With your things in your bag, you walked out of the school and to the local coffee shop nearby, since you and Mina had planned for a day together after school. She had another class before she was done, so you grabbed out your laptop and started looking at possible topics for your research project. It was a National History Day project, except your teacher had to make it mandatory. And of course, you couldn't even choose your partners. 'I just hope I get a good partner,' you thought. 

This year's theme for the project was "Turning Points in History", so a lot of major events that had a lot of evidence would be pretty good. You started to write out a list of events that would be good, when Mina walked through the door and into the shop. 

"Mina!" You called out to her, getting up to give her a hug. You both have been super busy this school year, so it always feels great when you get to see each other after a while. In the embrace, you could tell she smelled like bubblegum, her favorite perfume. She wore white dress pants with a pink blouse, and her hair was down. She is one of the most fashionable people you know, and always lives up to that. 

"You look so good today!" You told her, gesturing at her outfit. 

"Thank you! You do too!" she said. Your outfit was not at nice as hers - just some lighter jeans with a long pink sweater on. It was funny that you were matching, without coordinating at all. 

You waved her over to the table you were at, a smaller booth in the back of the shop. It was cute, and had multiple like this one - closed off on 3 sides, cute small pillows on the booth seats, and a large lamp hanging overhead. It was actually a really nice place to study. 

You two sat down, and you closed your laptop as you moved back to where you were sitting. 

"So how have you been? Is there any new tea?" Mina asked, a smirk poking at her lips. 

"I don't know," you said. "Nothing new with people right now, thank goodness." Your luck with drama was not always the best, as it usually was more negative.  Thankfully, though, there hasn't been much drama at all, so it's been good so far, and you told her this. 

"There is this huge project we have to do for my history class, and the partners are assigned. I just hope I get someone good for that." 

"Well, that's good," she said, her smile sweet. "I hope that any drama that comes your way is good drama that you can tell me about, and I hope your partner is who you hope it is," she said, and her sweet smile quickly became a smirk. You both laughed. 

There wasn't anyone on your mind that came up at her comment, but you hoped that soon someone could fill that void. 

The next class finally rolled around, and so the partners were posted on the board at the beginning of class. Since everyone was already crowded around the paper, you decided to set down your things and then come back. You maneuvered your way around the people that were done looking at it, and found yourself in front of the paper. You scrolled down the list of names. 

Denki Kaminari, Sero Hanta

Bakugo Katsuki, Izuku Midoriya

Yn/Ln, Eijiro Kirishima

Kyoka Jiro, Momo Yaoyurozu

You didnt look much after that, since you saw your own name. If you were being completely honest, you didn't know a lot of these people name-to-face. You would have to find Kirishima, whoever that was. The hope that they were someone good still remained in the back of your mind as you looked around the classroom, walking back to your seat. 

Once Mr. Aizawa started calling out attendance, an idea popped up in your head. You would have to pay attention to figure out who Kirishima was, especially since they would be one of the first ones to get called. A few moments passed until you finally heard Mr. Aizawa call out their name. You looked around the room to find that the person who responded was a bright red-haired guy towards the back of the class. 

You realized you would have to talk to him after class, and your anxiety shot up. 'I need to push through this and just talk to him,' you thought to yourself. Calming yourself, you took out your laptop to take some notes on the requirements for the project. You didn't want to look, but you hoped that he was taking some notes of his own at least. 

After you made a whole rubric and watched a few videos, you felt more prepared about the requirements. 

"The next few classes will be structured so that you are learning about National History Day and the requirements for the project, because apparently I have to show you those. Also that way you aren't learning anything new while also trying to do this entire project," Mr. Aizawa stated, his tone laced with boredom and fatigue. Contrastingly, his statement brought a few smiles to the students. Class time for a project would be a great way to get ahead on it. 

Tentatively, you raised your hand. 

"Yes, Ms. L/N?" Mr. Aizawa asked. 

"I was wondering if we would be able to move closer to our partners so that we could use this time to work with them?" you asked, your voice a lot quieter than it normally was. 

"Yes, you may," he answered. "As long as you are still quiet and not making too much noise. This is supposed to be a lecture class, so it's supposed to be quiet except for me, but I'm nice today."

A nice smile was brought to your lips, despite the anxious butterflies flitting around in your stomach. You snuck a glance back up at Kirishima, and found that he was looking at you as well. Quickly you turned away, your cheeks flushing red. You realized that you needed to talk to him, though, and turned back around. 

"Do you want me to move up there?" you mouthed at him. He gave you a thumbs up and a smile in response. 

"Okay, you may get started," Mr. Aizawa told the class. You packed up your things other than your open laptop and got up from your seat to move closer to Kirishima. 

"Hi," you said as you placed your laptop down in the seat next to him. 

"Hi," he replied. Out of the corner of your eye you saw that he was looking you up and down. Your skin erupted with goosebumps, and you set down your bag behind the seat. You pulled the chair next to him out and sat down, re-logging into your laptop. 

"Do you know what topic you want to do?" you asked Kirishima, turning to him. On your laptop was open the list of different topics you thought might be good. 

"Right to business, huh?" he chuckled, taking a glance at your laptop. You laughed with him. 

"Well, we have the time now, I'd rather use it and have to work less outside of class," you explained. 

"That's... valid," he decided. "I wasn't quite sure yet, was there anything you had in mind?" 

"Well..." you began. 

The two of you ended up going with the Civil Rights Movement, which wasn't exactly the least common topic, but it was perfect for the theme of the project and you had decided that you were going to make the best presentation you could possibly make. Soon, though, the clock was close to the time the bell rang, and so you had decided to wrap up. 

"Since we're partners for this project, do you wanna work on it outside of class? This might be the only class time we have to work on it," you told him. 

"Yeah, that's fine," Kirishima said. 

"Okay great," you paused, opening your phone. "Do you wanna put your number in and I can text you?" 

"Yeah, sure," he said, taking your phone from your hand offering it to him. Quickly he typed in his number and his name, and then handed back your phone. It wasn't a moment too soon, either, because the bell rang right then. 

"Awesome, thank you!" Closing your laptop and putting it in your bag, you shot a sweet smile at Kirishima. This time, he smiled back. 

The walk back to your place wasn't that bad, and with his smile in your mind, you felt like you were back in no time.

That night you couldn't sleep. Turning over, you checked the clock, and it read: 

1:03

You groaned as you turned back over. You had been doing so all night, and you were tired of it. You turned on your phone to see if you had any notifications. There weren't. 

'Oh shoot,' you said aloud in the dark. Of course there weren't going to be any notifications. First of all, it was 1AM, and second of all, you were the one who had his number. Not the other way around. You went to contacts and found his name. You clicked on the info button and went to message. 

'Hey, it's Y/N - can't sleep so I figured I'd text you even if you aren't up - if you see this, I was wondering if you are free tomorrow after class to work together for a bit on our project? If not it's fine, just let me know. Thanks!' You sat there with the message in the draft box, not yet sent. Finally, your 1AM self decided that it would be a great idea and sent the message. You closed the app and turned off your phone, setting it down on the nightstand next to you. Turning over once again, you closed your eyes and tried to sleep. 23 minutes later, you received a message. You grabbed your phone off of the nightstand to open a text from Kirishima: 

'Yeah, of course - I have practice but I am definitely free after that. Couldn't sleep either btw' Kirishima responded. 

The butterflies came out of their cocoons in your stomach at his response. You tried to calm the butterflies as you responded, but it was tough when you were trying to schedule studying with him. 

'Okay, when does practice end for you?' you asked. 

You saw the typing bubble pop up after he read your question. 

'Around 7:30' he answered. 

'Jeez, that's kinda late' you replied. 7:30 would be around dinner, possibly after depending on when you made it. 

'Yeah, if you're cool with that?' he asked. 

Probably making a bad decision, you replied: 'Yeah, sure - my place' 

'Ok cool' he answered quickly. 

':)' Ending the conversation, you sent an emoji, put your phone down, and went to attempt to sleep again. 

The next day went by extremely slow. 

You weren't exactly happy about the late study time, but you weren't exactly opposed, either. Throughout the day, though, you watched as the time ticked by, taking as long as it possibly could, it seems. Your classes never seemed to end, the assignments and lectures dragged on and didn't help to pass the time, either. Finally, though, you were able to pack up your things and get back to your place. On your way home, you texted Kirishima your address. He probably wouldn't see it, but it will be there when he's done with practice. 

When you got home, you rewrote your notes from your classes and got started on a few papers and assignments. Once you were done, you got started on making dinner, which was around 7. You weren't exactly the best cook, so it took you a lot longer to make things, but you got it done. 

You had started the sauce for spaghetti, when you heard the doorbell ring. Your roomates wouldn't be home tonight, since they were going to a party. Expecting only one person to be at the door, you walked over and opened it. 

There he was. Kirishima. And he was... wet?

"Sorry I'm late, I had to shower after practice," he said. "Took me a bit longer than I wanted to." 

Quickly you glanced over at the clock to see what time it was. Chuckling, you said, "It's not even 8 yet."

"Oh, shit, my clocks run a bit fast. Forgot about that," he replied sheepishly.

"That's okay," you said, moving aside so he could step through. As he did, you took your split second of a chance to glance at him up and down. He was dressed comfortably (you couldn't blame him, he was just coming from practice) in sweatpants and a black t-shirt. The t-shirt was school merch, with the logo printed large on the front. 

He walked in enough to close the door, so once you did, you started walking back to the kitchen where you were finishing up making dinner. 

"You can sit down in here if you want, you don't have to be a lurker," you told him, chuckling. "None of the girls are gonna be home tonight, so we have some privacy." 

"Oh, sorry," he said. "I didn't want to intrude."

"That's fine, you're in here now, so you might as well get comfortable. Plus, I'm almost done with spaghetti if you want some," you offered. 

"I might take you up on that offer," he said. While you stirred the sauce, you could hear him behind you sitting in one of the seats at the counter. Your laptop and a few paper sources were also over on the counter. 

A few minutes later, the sauce was done, and the noodles were now in the strainer in the sink. 

"How much do you want?" you asked Kirishima. 

"I can get it," he said. "I don't want to take too much." 

"Okay," you said, grabbing out plates from the cabinet. You left the door open so that he could grab one too, and you went to grab your own food. 

You sat down at the counter where your laptop was, and when he came and sat down next to you, he said, "Wow, this looks really good y/n. Thank you."

"Of course," you replied. 

Since it was already late, the study session went by pretty fast. The two of you were getting a lot of work done. 

When you took a pause, you glanced over at the clock, which read: 11:24

"Oh my gosh, you need to get back and get some sleep!" you exclaimed, not realizing how long you had been working for. "We have been working for way too long!" 

"It's fine, no worries," he reassured you. "You do too, though, okay?" His gaze was soft as he looked at your panicked face. He must have been tired after almost 3 hours of work, plus it being after practice. This was normal for you, but you didn't know if it was for him. His soft gaze had to have been from tiredness, you told yourself, trying to push the butterflies and blush away. 

"Okay, I will, but you need to get home first." You told him. 

"Alright," he decided. 

Even though his room was within walking distance from yours, you drove him home (because it was so late, you told yourself. Definitely not because you like him). In the walk back to his room from your car, you both listened to the light sounds of the night. It was sweet and calming after studying for so long. 

"Thanks for coming over and working with me," you told Kirishima. 

"Thank you for inviting me, and your spaghetti was great, too," he told you. 

"Definitely. We should do this again," you suggested. 

"For sure. Maybe my place next time?" he asked. 

"Yeah, sure." 

"Awesome. I'll text you."

His last glance at you of the night was one where he was smiling, and it filled you up with a warmth inside that you couldn't get rid of all the way home. That warmth helped you to sleep better than you had most nights at school yet. 

3 weeks later and almost completely done with your project, you closed your laptop for the night. Kirishima was next to you, finishing up his last bit he needed for the presentation. 

"This Friday was a bit rough, huh?" Kirishima asked you. 

"Yeah, definitely. Classes lately have not been fun," you replied, a small smile sneaking onto your face. 

"Glad we're almost done, though - this project will definitely be worth it once we're entirely finished," he commented. 

"I did enjoy spending this time together, though," you said, trying to bring a positive aspect back to the topic.

"Same, I'm really glad we're partners," Kirishima said, his face flushing a pink where normally you never saw that. He turned away quickly, and you did too, smiling a bit at his blush. 

Tonight you were dressed a bit nicer, since you were coming from dinner with an old friend, and you decided not to change. He was dressed nicer too, but you weren't quite sure why. It was definitely getting to you though, since normally you both dressed casual when you studied together. 

"Hey," he said, clearing his throat. "Um, so normally I would ask if you wanted to study sometime this weekend, but since we're almost done with the project, would you like to go on a date with me instead?" 

Immediately your heart swelled, suddenly your stomach was filled with hundreds of flitting butterflies and your face was hot, blush lighting up your face with red. 

"Yes, I would love to," you said, the wave of joy finally breaking with a huge ecstatic smile on your face. 

Kirishima's face lit up with red, almost as bright as his fiery hair. He proceeded to celebrate by jumping into the air as high as he could, pumping his fists in the air. 

"YES! Okay, awesome!" He almost yelled, his excitement making you giggle. 

"Okay, I'll pick you up tomorrow, then?"

"Yes, I'm free tomorrow so that should be okay," you told him, a cheesy grin stuck on your face. "Text me any other details I might need, okay?" 

"Okay, awesome," he replied, his excitement still clearly showing on his face, also still bright red as well. 

Soon after that he drove home, and when he stepped out the door to leave, you closed the door and pressed your back against it, standing there for a minute with a wild grin. Your emotions were running high, and you stepped away from the door only to jump around cheering in your front hallway for a bit. 

The next day was the longest you have ever been through. He texted you in the morning that he was going to pick you up at 6, and that you could dress casual (because you asked him what you needed to wear). However, after waking up at 8 with a free day ahead of you, you didn't know what to do with yourself. Somehow, though, you managed to fill your day (partly because you were in a call with Mina half the morning, describing the situation and her giving you advice) and you were ready by 5:30 for Kirishima to arrive. You had decided to wear a dressier t-shirt with leggings. 

Before 6:00 rolled around, Kirishima got to your place and walked up to your door, and before he got to knock on it (he took a second to hype himself up before he knocked on your door), you opened it and saw him standing there in a cute white shirt with black pants on. The outfit accentuated his figure well, and you could tell he was strong, and his muscles were toned. His bright red hair was fluffy, like he normally has it, and he donned a cute smile as he checked you out as well. 

"Wow... you look really pretty," he said, blush creeping onto his cheeks. Your eyes were planted on his, and you could see he couldnt take his off of your shirt, which was a low, V-cut shirt and helped to show off your cleavage a bit. 

You laughed as you replied, "Thank you, you do too." 

This finally brought his eyes back up to your face, and the blush that was creeping up just onto his cheeks now covered his entire face as he realized he was totally caught. 

"I'm sorry, you just... your outfit is- it's-" he stuttered, trying to explain himself.

"It's okay, I'm the one who wore the outfit," you told him. "Come on, take me where you want to, Kiri," you walked out the door and past him. 

After a second he followed you back to his car, and he unlocked it so you both could get in. 

The ride there wasn't very long, so you only got through a bit of small talk before you saw he was taking you to a mini-put course. You smiled as the memories of the last few times you had gone mini-putting, and you thought it was very cute that it would also be your first date with Kirishima. 

The man who checked the two of you in was old, and he could tell that you were on a date together. He had a very dopey smile on while you both got putters and balls, and when you were walking out the door, he called, "Have fun, you lovebirds!" When the door shut, both of your faces were bright red, but you looked at each other and burst out into laughter.

Still laughing, you walked over to the first hole. This one was probably the easiest, being the most straightforward with only a few obstacles. After that, though, it only got harder. 

The theme of the place was cute - it was a bit plain, being that it was outdoors-themed, with a few water features, but it was cute and it was fun. There were only a couple other people there, one group being a cute older couple that was almost done by the time you and Kirishima had started, and the other group being a small family that was about mid-way through the course. It was nice, though, because it meant that the two of you could go at your own pace, and talk about the things you wanted to, and just have fun together without any interruptions. 

At each hole, you tried to get Kiri to go first so that you could stand behind him and sneak a few looks. Sometimes it worked, but other times he would catch you and laugh, or he would refuse (so that he could do the same thing, even though you definitely caught him more times than he caught you). 

The evening was filled with laughter, teasing, and fun, and in the end, you both tied. At the last hole, Kirishima was in the lead by 1, and his first putt missed the hole by inches. He ended with 2 on the last hole. When your last turn came up, you gave it your best shot, even though you thought you weren't going to win. Your ball ended up making it in one shot, and when you went to pick up your ball out of the hole, Kirishima was there, his mouth wide open in shock. In the adrenaline of your comeback, you walked over to him. 

"Cat's game," you whispered in his ear, planted a quick kiss on his cheek, and gently closed his jaw as you did so. 

Quickly you walked back into the check-in building, the heat in your cheeks rising extremely fast after that. You put back your ball and putter, told the older man that you would be right back, and rushed to the restroom. While you were in there, you took a second and washed your hands, calming yourself down. 

You hadn't bothered to see if Kirishima followed you into the building, so when he burst into the bathroom, you were only half shocked. The shock only hit you when you turned around, your back to the sink, and he grabs your hips.

"Can I kiss you?" He asks, his face red with blush, his voice deep, but a little desperate.

"Yes," you responded, your voice shaky with shock and emotion. The clash of his lips against yours was electric, sparking throughout your body. One of his hands reaches up to your cheek, while the other stays at your hip. Slowly, the one at your hip moves from its position towards your stomach, where he slides his hand underneath your shirt and up, his thumb brushing against the bottom of your cleavage. At the same time, he moves his lips from yours and towards your jaw, moving down to your neck. He finds your sweet spot and begins to suck, earning a small moan from you. 

"Kiri.." you start, but trail off when he continues. 

"Don't worry, no one's coming," he says, trying to reassure you. 

"Kiri, no," you pause, making him stop. "I want you, and I want more, I just don't want it here, in this bathroom at a mini-putt-course."

His bright red eyes change from hurt to confusion, to bright again when you tell him this. 

"Ohhh," he says, pulling away gently. "Shoot, and I still have to pay for the date, too. Good idea," he commends you, which earns a laughing smile from you both. 

Thankfully, when you leave the bathroom, the old man is turned around, reading something. Together, you walk up to the counter. Kiri pays for the time at the course, and together again you walk out and to his car. 

When you sit down, Kiri takes a second before he starts the car to move your hair out of your face and behind your ear. The contact is filled with electricity, and makes you shiver, only being able to hope he didn't notice. After putting the car into drive and pulling out of the parking lot, he puts his hand on your thigh, and you shiver even worse than you did seconds ago, goosebumps lighting up your skin. Discreetly, you try and close your knees to hide the heat pooling between your legs. You realize it doesn't quite work, though, when you see his smirk, and he proceeds to move his hand a bit further up. 

Once you get to his place, he moves his hand from your thigh to put the car in park, and you immediately miss the contact. You don't have to miss it for long, though, when you get inside.

The door barely closes before his hands and his lips are on you again, making your skin light up with electricity. He starts to suck on your sweet spot again, which also earns another moan from you. You can barely get out the next few words, he's making you feel so good already.

"Kiri.." you try to tell him. This time it works - his head perks up, ready to listen to you.

"Kiri, where is your room?"

The simple question ignites a fire in his eyes, lust being the fuel. Quickly and easily, he picks you up so that he is holding you by your thighs. You wrap your legs around his waist and your arms around his neck to help him, and he takes you to his room.

Gently, he places you on the bed, where you take a breath before you kiss him again, pulling him down on top of you. He takes this and moves his hand onto you again, one on the bed by your head, the other carefully placed against your stomach. Your hands are in his hair, tugging and pulling it, showing him how much more you want.

Once again, he moves his hand up and under the bottom of your shirt, just underneath the cup of your bra, his thumb barely brushing it. The slight touch sparks electricity through your body, and it pools in your core.

You push back at his collar, and he lets you sit up enough to take off your shirt. His eyes are on you the whole time, and once you get it off, his jaw drops once more.

"Holy shit, you're beautiful," he says, still not taking his eyes off of you.

"Hold on a minute, though," he continues, once you reach out towards his collar again. "Are you sure you want this?"

The question brings back that warmth he shared from his smile weeks ago, and it was something even as simple as asking for consent. That warmth ensured that the fire burning inside of you right now would never go out.

"Kiri, I have wanted you since the first day we became partners for that project," you stated. "Yes, I am sure I want this."

"Okay, good, because I have, too," he says, and as you finally pull him down onto you, at the last second you flip him over so that he is on the bed and you're on top.

He grins wildly as you start unbuttoning his pants, and he helps you by taking off his shirt and tossing it to the side.

You pull down his boxers to reveal his erection, and his huge cock. Your core throbs at the sight, and you fight the urge to lick your lips, failing miserably.

When you place your lips around the tip of his length, Kiri throws his head back with a loud moan. Slowly, you start to bob your head up and down, sucking gently as you did. Your hand stroked the rest of him as well, and you could tell the sensation was doing lots of things to Kirishima. He was moaning so loud, you were sure the neighbors could hear, but you didn't want to stop. Kiri tried (and failed) not to thrust up into your throat, but you didn't mind it too much.

"Im.. so close-" he said, just a few seconds before you felt his white hot release in your mouth. When you were sure you had sucked him dry, you swallowed, earning yourself another groan and a wild grin from Kirishima.

"My turn," he said. He helps you to unclasp your bra, your cleavage falling out and bouncing in front of his face. Quickly he flipped you over, so that you were underneath him, your back against the bed. Contrastingly slow, he pulled your leggings down your legs, revealing your underwear and soaking pussy.

"Wow, all for me?" He started, pulling aside your underwear and rubbing a single finger through your folds. This immediately follows by a groan from you.

"Yes- Kiri, all for- for you," you just barely manage to stutter out once he puts that finger inside of you and starts to pump it in and out. The action makes you bite your lip, trying to stop the loud moans escaping you.

When Kiri sees this, he grabs your chin and pulls it to face him, still not stopping his fingers inside of you.

"Don't hide your voice, I want to hear every single sound you make tonight. And no one is going to hear but me," he says, and you let go, loud moans breaking free from your lips.

"Atta girl," he praises, which only goes down to your pussy, where he adds another finger inside of you now. He hits your G-spot every time, curling his fingers just so that he can get it. And he definitely does - you were close to your release.

"Kiri-" you warn, feeling the string of ecstacy being pulled tight, about to snap. "Don't stop-"

You gasp as your orgasm hits you like a waterfall, ecstacy and electricity rushing through you as that string snaps. You cum on his fingers, the stringy substance coating his fingers thickly. You ride your orgasm out on his fingers, and once you're done, he puts his fingers in his mouth and tastes your sweet release.

"You taste so fucking sweet," he praises you. You're still panting from your orgasm off his fingers, and it doesn't help when he pulls your underwear off your hips, tosses it to the floor, and pushes your legs up so that your knees are almost touching your shoulders.

He lines up his cock with your entrance, and your eyes widen as you realize you are about to take his monster of a cock inside you. He passes through your folds a few times before he slowly enters you, one inch at a time. He gets through just the tip before he stops so that you can adjust to the pleasant burn he gives you. Once you're adjusted well, he pushes inside of you just an inch further. He pushes down to the hilt inside of you, and you gasp again as his dick hits your cervix easily.

You adjust to the burn quickly, and thankfully because he begins to pump in and out of you, earning multiple pornographic moans from you. You can feel the buildup of pressure already, building up like a wall about to crash.

Kirishima drives into your pussy, moans releasing from both of you as you get closer to your high. His hands roam your body, one cupping and kneadind your breast and nipple, the other holding onto your waist.

He fucks into you harder and harder, faster and faster, until you can feel the cracks in the wall, a dam about to burst. Your moans mesh together as you both reach your high simultaneously. The dam breaks, erupting as his does too, resulting in a mix of his and your release together at the base of his cock, still hilt deep inside of you. Your legs shake from your release, and the last few pumps of your orgasms fall out of you both.

You lay on the bed in ecstacy as Kirishima pulls out of your ruined pussy, gets up from you and goes to the bathroom to cleanup. He comes back with a towel for you, and helps you to clean up the mess that is the two of you. Once he is done, he puts your previously discarded clothes into the hamper, and gives you a pair of shorts and a too-big shirt for you to wear, and he changes into a loose shirt and boxers as well. He helps you change, and when the two of you are done, he climbs into the bed next to you and places a kiss on your forehead.

"So, does this mean I'm your boyfriend now?" He whispers. You turn around and push his forehead lightly back to play with him.

"I think we need to play another game to determine that," you reply, a coy smile playing at your lips, despite recent events.

"Or..." Kiri trails off, trying to think of a comeback or an easier situation.

"Or... what?" You tease him, giggling as you watch his eyes light up with an idea.

"Or I could just fuck you again, except harder," he states, and this time you can't tell if he's serious or not.

"Harder?" You whisper, thinking about how he could possibly do that after what he did tonight.

"Yeah, although we might have to wait until the morning to do that, cause then you can walk," he says, his tone nothing but factual. He places one last kiss on your cheek this time, spooning you in the bed. The kiss makes the warmth inside of you burn brighter, never to go out again.