#i do my best to try everything once as long as it won't cost me money (or too much money anyway)

[romaritimeharbor]

id also have many many dollars but im sooo picky with games agvhsjdfg

VALID THOUGH i am also really picky with any and all media i consume; it's just that my boyfriend, who i've known for almost 8 years now, is often the one to give me recommendations and he knows me like. Uh. VERYYYY well. i can only recall one time where i wasn't into something he recommended to me, and that was because i had already been into that media when i was younger and i knew it wouldn't be to my tastes nowadays. other than that, every recommendation i've taken from him has worked out very well HELDPSJSKSGJG he was literally the one that got me into genshin......

[lady-raziel]

long reaction to the update

ok. so they put out an update video! since i've been commentating for the last three days i might as well subject you all to more of my thoughts today.

main takeaway: this was a good apology video. i mean it. short and to the point, no overproduction, heartfelt and honest (and not a ukelele to be seen. thank god.) they took ownership of the situation, apologized, and restated how much they value their relationship with the fandom.

their solution is to make the watcher tv platform into kind of an iteration of patreon where content is available for early access before it is released onto youtube later. this is clearly a better option than paywalling everything for everyone. i'm not sure what the relative breakdown of costs turns out to be when you compare how much they were making on patreon after the platform took their cut VS how much it costs in overhead to run and maintain their own platform (how much it costs annually to contract via Vimeo, essentially). but i'm sure that's part of the calculation.

all things considered, that does seem like the best option out of all the alternatives. it allows them to not completely abandon any of the pans they have simmering over the fire for the time being. i don't think i ever thought they were going to just say "oops, forget about the streaming thing! let's pretend that never happened!" because at this point they've invested quite a lot of time and money into it, and i don't disagree that keeping it in some iteration may help them make up some of the funds they're lacking.

i would say, it's fine to keep the streamer. this is one of the ok outcomes, all things considered-- but if they're going to do it, they've GOT to do it smart from this point forward. listen to both the fans and the consultants intimately. both are going to have valid points, and both are going to be right. listening to too much of either side will sink this thing because each has motives and expertise that the other doesn't. if the fans say $6 is too much, listen to them-- but have conversations with business consultants about how much you realistically need to charge to make things work.

also, i'd use this whole situation as a learning experience. watcher is a young company, and it's literally inevitable that mistakes will happen. what's different is that the watcher crew haven't really been in a position before where they've been on the receiving end of the internet-angry-justice-hammer to this extent. it's one thing to watch it happen to others, but it's a position of extreme privilege (and a bit of hubris) to think "but that won't happen to me, because i'm built different." naw, man-- two things in life are inevitable: death and fuckups. the callout posts get us all in the end.

what's really important is that they use this as a wakeup call that even the most loyal fandoms will only follow you so far to the cliff's edge, and you don't want to push that. you have to strike a balance between the passion projects that you think are worthy and the stuff that maybe doesn't excite you as much anymore but the people want to see. a little fanservice keeps the lights on, as unfair as that might seem. i'm gonna make 50 markiplier choccy milk memes just so i can make one niche political joke once and a while for 6 likes. it is what it is.

i'd also use this as a chance to take a very careful look at company structure and finances. it's not fun to do and nobody likes it. trust me-- this is hard whether you're a single adult trying to pay the bills or the freaking US government (speaking from experience on both-- i have to read the president's budget for work frequently). but you all have to ask hard questions about the ratio of creative staff you take on VS staff for administrative and other business roles, as well as the costs and benefits of everything you spend money on. how many staff members are essential to location shoots? can this video be shot with 2 cameras instead of 3 and thus you don't need another cameraperson? you might even have to come to the decision that instead of pitching a new show it makes more sense to use those funds to hire your essential non-creative roles or contract firms or freelancers.

paying staff a fair wage with benefits speaks highly of what watcher wants their values to be. it's hard to find such a position in a creative role and still actually get to work on things you care about. but it would be much worse if watcher didn't make realistic decisions about finances and it lead to the death of the company and everyone losing their jobs. the whole watcher company can work, in my opinion, but not without some sacrifices. they're going to have to run it more like a business and less like a youtube-channel-turned-business in the future if they want to survive.

last thing i'll add is that while i do think this was a good apology video, i still think they hurt themselves by not putting out some sort of statement on Friday or Saturday just to say that they were formulating a response. As i've said in other posts, it's ok and in fact beneficial to not make a kneejerk reaction, but it's also very important to communicate that you SEE what's happening. you SEE what people are saying and THAT'S why you need more time to respond. saying nothing and leaving the angry public to wonder if you dropped your phone off the Hoover Dam or just don't care? that's a fumble. it's a common mistake companies make in a crisis, but that doesn't mean it doesn't erode trust fast.

this could have been handled better in many ways. we see that, and i'm glad watcher says they see that too. crucial going forward is taking all this and patching the errors that caused all this to fall apart and learning from the experience.

tbh at this point what i'm most sad about is that the watcher crew have probably been too stressed out and upset to appreciate some of the absolute bangers people have been laying down to clown on them. i think if it wasn't about them they might be touched by the collective attitude and creative spirit. /j

[earthnashes]

The completed version of that sketch I teased a while ago! Angela and Demona have a much needed talk. uwu

So, I know I've been harkin' and hollerin' about starting a Gargoyles AU, and after this lil thing... WELL. I can't help myself man, plz ;w;

But even though I've yet to fully sit down to rewatch the show for concrete foundations, I'm gettin' bombarded with ideas for this badboy. I'll talk at length about my idea once I have something a little more solid, but for now the context is the AU explores Demona's journey to redemption, and her attempts to grow amidst the chaos of the general public now learning gargoyles exist (and the consequences that comes with it).

Below the "keep reading" is a short story I wrote on how Demona and Angela's first uninterrupted reunion could go. Angela is determined to try and convince her mother to give humanity--give everyone, really-- one more chance. Even with all the craziness and the very fragile relations between the supernatural and humans, Angela sees it as their best and only bet to actually build a long-lasting rapport. And a chance to have her mother in her life with minimal conflict.

--

"--Don't you understand? The humans took everything from me, and they have only grown worse. One so-called 'good' human can't undo that. They are never good."

"But they can be if you just let them!" Angela growls, flailing her talons out to her sides in a wide gesture around the city. "Mother, haven't you ever thought that maybe not all humans are bad? That they and gargoyle are more alike than you believe? You've been around for years. You can't honestly tell me you haven't met a gargoyle you couldn't trust in your lifetime."

"I trust no one," Demona sneers, turning her back on her daughter and hunching in on herself, arms crossed close to her chest. "It's what kept me alive this long."

"But at what cost? Mother... you are clanless." Demona doesn't turn around at the mournful tone, and Angela pushes on. "Y-you have no one. But you don't have to be--"

"Angela--" Demona's voice is loud, unwavering, but her tone is so, so tired. It's almost wrung out of her in a sigh that only hints at centuries of gliding solo.

"That is enough."

For several moments, there is heavy silence. Demona doesn't turn around, but the scent of salt in the air is tell enough. She heaves another sigh and begins to step toward the edge of the rooftop they've chosen for this meeting, fully intent on putting an end to such a miserable conversation.

"...Everyone believes you are nothing more than a monster."  Demona keeps going, crouches down and begins to unfurl her wings.

"But I don't believe that."

That stops her. She freezes as if the sun has touched her skin, still as the stone sleep she no longer experiences. She still doesn't turn, but her head tilts to the side. Listening.

"I saw how desperately you want clan when you were with Thailog," Angela whispers hoarsely. "I saw how you looked at me, w-when you realized I was your daughter. You... you turned on Thailog to save me. Save us. But now I--" She whipes furiously at her eyes in frustration. "--you speak as if you want nothing to do with me--"

"You know that isn't true," Demona says, finally, finally whirling to face her daughter. Instinct drives her to open her arms, to reach out, but years of solitude stops her in her tracks. Her hesitation goes mostly unnoticed.

"Then prove it!" Angela barks. She lashes her tail and unfurls her wings. "I want you in my life! I want you to be clan. But I can't do that if you aren't willing to at least try." Angela closes the distance between them, grasping her mother's talons and --almost instantly-- feels like a child again. She gives her a gentle squeeze, and relief nearly floods her when she feels a small, hesitant one back.

"I can't ask for you to forget... or forgive. I won't. But I am asking you to... t-to at least try, and give me a chance? To give humans a chance, one more time."

Angela's eyes bore into her mother as she pleads: "Give me this one chance to prove you wrong."

-----------

Hope ya'll enjoyed! Now that I reread the short there's a lot I'd like to revise and add, but for now this will work. :)

But ye! More to come soon! ;w;

[jennapancake]

Love Made Me Crazy pt. 2

Part 2 of 2

Luke Castellan x Aphrodite!Reader

Summary: Luke would do anything to win you back and I mean anything.

Warnings: Use of y/n, Dark Luke?, pet names, pining, not proof-read, indications of kidnapping.

A/n: Thank you for the support I got on the first part. This did not come out how I wanted it to but I'm still decently happy with it. I've been enjoying the chance to finally post on Tumblr after being scared to the last 5 months so thank you all for reading!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Luke Castellan was not one to give up on the girl of his dreams and that was blatantly obvious at this point.

It had been a week. A week since I broke Luke Castellans heart and a week since I did everything in my power to avoid the boy at all costs. But my efforts proved futile.

For the last week, Luke has done everything in his power to get my attention. He's gone from tracking me down to every place I could possibly be to try to talk, to giving my siblings and friends letters and gifts in order to reach me.

Even one night pulling a cliché movie trick and standing outside of my cabin with a boombox on his shoulder. In the rain. Yelling love proclamations. It was two in the morning.

But still I prevailed at ignoring him and fighting off the worst heartbreak of my entire life.

Because eventually Luke stopped pining after me. Or at least I thought he had until, Luke Castellan decided the end of our relationship wasn't it for him.

The cute letters and gifts, the constant tracking me down just to try to sweet talk me into getting back together changed and so drastically I didn't even see it coming.

Eventually I would notice the boy following me everywhere and I mean everywhere and yes that was normal for Luke after the breakup but the look in his eyes was something different than usual. It was dark and I couldn't tell if the boy wanted to kill me or kiss me. If I wasn't trying my best to stay away before I definitely was now.

But once again my efforts were futile.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Luke's POV from the night of the breakup.

"Y/n!" I called, chasing after the girl as she ran away from me in tears. "Y/n please!" But my yelling and chasing was no use, she had reached her cabin.

My heart crumbled at the loss of her. I just don't understand. What did I do wrong? We were doing so good. Maybe I didn't give her enough attention because of counselor duties?

That's the only possible solution I could come up with. I'll prove to her I can give her the attention she deserves and we'll get back together. 𝑰 𝒘𝒐𝒏'𝒕 𝒍𝒐𝒔𝒆 𝒉𝒆𝒓.

So for the next week, Luke Castellan planned the most adorable ideas he could come up with to give you attention.

Writing love notes until his hands were sore, sneaking out of camp late at night just to go find you gifts, and memorizing your schedule just so he could walk you places and try to talk to you about the situation at hand.

But no matter what Luke did you still avoided him. You still acted as if you were strangers and nothing like the lovers you had been for so long before.

He couldn't understand.

He wouldn't accept it.

"Why? Why won't she even look at me" He yelled, pacing around the forest. "I'm doing everything in my power to win her back and she can't even acknowledge me?!" The tears filled his eyes as the anger rose inside of him.

"Were meant to be she can't just throw that- away" The boy yelled once more, throwing a punch at a poor tree nearby. "She needs to know she can't throw that away." The look on Luke's face was menacing. Not the Luke you knew before and I doubt he ever would be again.

For the next three days Luke planned and plotted. New ideas forming in Luke's head of all the reasons you didn't want him. All the reasons he couldn't allow you to leave. You said you'd love him forever. He decided he'd give you a few days of your peace before his plans came to play.

The boy started small, following you everywhere. No one would touch you, anyone near you would be...let's say dealt with. No more boys will be around his girl, that's for sure.

Next step was leaving you more gifts, except these were different. They ranged from pictures of you that you didn't know were taken and signed with creepy notes from the boy. "𝙔𝙤𝙪'𝙧𝙚 𝙨𝙤 𝙗𝙚𝙖𝙪𝙩𝙞𝙛𝙪𝙡 𝙬𝙝𝙚𝙣 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙘𝙧𝙮. 𝘿𝙤𝙣'𝙩 𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙧𝙮 𝙗𝙚𝙖𝙪𝙩𝙞𝙛𝙪𝙡, 𝙄'𝙡𝙡 𝙖𝙡𝙬𝙖𝙮𝙨 𝙗𝙚 𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙣 𝙖𝙛𝙩𝙚𝙧 𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙮𝙤𝙣𝙚 𝙚𝙡𝙨𝙚 𝙞𝙨 𝙜𝙤𝙣𝙚." It was a photo of you crying the night before in the woods behind your cabin and while the note might have been cute at some point, to you it felt quite ominous and creepy.

The last straw was when you woke up from your much needed beauty sleep to the sound of your window opening. Just as you opened your eyes you saw the dark curly hair of the boy you loved, ominously staring at you. Yet before you could scream the boy lunged at you, a hand covering your mouth as he shook his head, raising his other hands to his lips in a shushing motion.

"Be quiet for me, love. Wouldn't want me to have to take out your whole cabin now would we?" The smirk that displayed itself on Luke's features at the thought of destroying your siblings was enough for you to comply.

"Good girl." He whispered, removing his hand from your mouth and placing it gently on your cheek. "Now darling let's go somewhere more private. Where we can finally get the chance to....discuss somethings." The pause in his sentence only drew fear in you. Something you had been feeling more lately in his presence instead of the safety you once felt.

Yet you complied and followed the boy out of your cabin and through the woods. Even if you wanted to run you can't, the boys arm was possessively wrapped around your shoulders, forcing you to continue your steps.

Once you reached a clearing the boy let up and took a few steps away, his back facing you. "You know, darling, if you wanted me to give you attention all you had to do was ask. You didn't have to start something like this." The tone of Luke's voice was dark, it sent a shiver down your spine or maybe the shiver was from the cold air hitting your bare arms. Not having time or the courage to grab a jacket on your way out of your cabin.

"Luke I-" You started only for Luke to cut you off. "I just don't understand, sweetheart. You know I love you. I've loved you since the moment I stepped into camp and yet you do this to me. You break my heart without an answer. After were finally together." He scoffed "and then you act as if we weren't even friends the next day. You wouldn't even acknowledge me....YOU WOULDN'T EVEN LOOK AT ME." Luke shouted as he turned around, pointing at his chest, tears in his eyes prominent in the moonlight.

"Luke I'm sorry-" Luke shook his head "No, sweetheart. You don't get to be sorry after this. You're going to have to make it right." The boy continued to take long strides closer to you. "You're going to have to come back to me. You're going to see were meant to be together whether you like it or not."

"Luke I can't be with you-" and once more the boy cut you off before you can explain your mother's rules. Although now you wonder if your mother's tragedy will be the one to kill you or if Luke will. "You have no choice, y/n."

"Please Luke just listen to me." I said quickly, backing up as the boy stepped closer to me, long quick strides and the most evil look adorning those eyes of the boy I once 𝒍𝒐𝒗𝒆𝒅.

But it didn't matter anymore because he was no longer the Luke I fell in love with. He was crazy. That was my lost thought as I turned to run only to be pulled back and my vision to fade, Luke's voice being the last thing I heard.

"Don't blame me, love made me crazy."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[spiceofvy]

Hello 👋👋 can I pls request BTS members unrequited love headcanons where they are in love with reader who is their friend. But reader is oblivious to their feelings and doesn't reciprocate because she is not a celebrity and she never thought that they will ever like her romantically. Thank you ❤️

BTS - Unrequited crush

a/n: thank you so much for requesting this! it made me breake my own heart, i hope you like it :,)

cws: gender neutral reader, angst, no comfort, no happy ending, i'm sorry, this hurts

Seokjin: Will just continue business as usual. He keeps being your cheery happy best friend. Cooking for you, spending his days with you. Everything to see you smile. Even gives you dating advice, ignoring his own breaking heart every time he sees you with someone else. Calls you after your days and wants to hear everything, less because he is happy for you and more because he wants to make sure that you are treated right. He holds you during every breakup, being so mad because he knows that he could be better for you. He will always be your loving best friend whose heart breaks the day you settle with someone else.

Hoseok: Tries to forget you no matter the cost. He goes around dating, hooking up, and looking for you in every person that he meets. Trying to find someone that can make him feel like he feels for you. Only to get hurt by doing this, he doesn't care. But you being his friend this doesn't go past you of course. Slowly you grow worried about Hoseok's self-destructive behavior. When you tell him that you are worried about him his heart breaks at the thought of putting that strain on you. But he won't change. I believe he is the one most likely to one day just break down and confess to you in tears. But sadly it's already too late, for the two of you.

Yoongi: No. He is done. Once he comes to terms with the fact that he could never have you he minimizes any and all contact with you. Pushing you away with his cold behavior, even if it hurts you and him. He just hopes that by seeing you less his feeling will slowly go away. But you don't give up, calling him, visiting him, at least wanting an explanation about him pushing you away. He buries himself in his work, trying to write out his heartache, producing tragic songs while doing so. But his mind stays with you. Always. Give him some time, after the initial hurt is getting better he will let you back into his life. Because being your friend and hopelessly in love with you is still better than losing you completely.

Namjoon: He mostly thinks about protecting you from the harsh world that is a life in the public eye. Just wants to witness you seeing all the beauty in the world which is impossible if you have to follow all the constrictions that come from being his partner. He writes so many songs about you. Most of them stay hidden in his pc. Maybe get shown to some of his producer friends without any context. He is so angry at the world, how unfair it is, that he will never find love in you. He wouldn't share too much of his idol life with you, scared that one day you start treating him differently due to his success. One night he confesses to you on the phone while being wasted. But you think it's a joke and he will never recover from that. He won't ever settle with someone else, knowing that the love of his life is just out of reach.

Jimin: He never stops trying. Even when he already knows that there is no point anymore. He takes you to his concerts, singing touching love songs while pointing at you in the audience. But you won't believe in the deeper meaning of that action. And he breaks his heart anytime he tries. He will take you out again and again until one day you get harassed by paparazzi at your doorstep. After that, he breaks all contact. Crying in his pillow that night, hurting more and more any time you try to call him, every text you send. But your being safe is more important than anything else. Even than his own broken heart.

Taehyung: It takes him the longest to come to terms with reality. He just doesn't want to believe it. That there truly is no way for him to be with you. He is a hopeless romantic and he believes there will always be some kind of way. There has to be. The world wouldn't be so cruel right? Wouldn't bring him together with his soulmate just so he can never be loved back. Until one day the rest of the boys intervene. Talking him back to the cruel reality they live in. How dangerous dating him would be for you. And if you liked him back, wouldn't you already have said something? He stops talking to you for a while afterward, only slowly letting you back into his life.

Jungkook: He wants to tell you that he loves you so badly. It's on the tip of his tongue every time he sees you. Every time you smile at him. Every moment you share. He has your whole life together planned out. You get married at the beach in the summer. Spending your honeymoon in 5 different countries, seeing the world, and living through adventures. You move to a nice house outside of the city. Just far away enough for you to live in peace but close enough that he can take you out for dinner anytime he wants. You will get another dog alongside bam, and you will be a happy perfect family. But he can't. So he stays in his apartment, with Bam by his side. Getting takeout for himself. You stay best friends, but on the day you get married to someone else, the first tears he cries at your wedding will not be out of happiness.

[victoria-rue]

victoria-rue's Recommendation Masterlist part 4

I can't believe I've done this four times. I should probably link the other four lists, I just now thought of that. In every list there are at most 50 people tagged, just because I once read that was the limit. I have now learned otherwise; I won't be changing that up now, it feels like tradition. Also, every single story linked in all of my masterlists has at least 2 chapters. But now, the important part, the Authors. These authors deserve to have their stories spread, the same stories that linger long after the last page. Their creativity ignites imaginations and sparks conversations that bring us closer together. So even if barely anyone will see this, I hope the people who do enjoy their stories as much as I did ♥︎

Recommendation Masterlist part 1, part 2, part 3, & part 4

Marvel

Peter/Pietro Maximoff

Bitchin' by @taintandviolent

You always wear your silver rollerskates. But, when Peter Maximoff decides to check out the roller rink's arcade, and spots you... It's fate. At least, Peter thinks so.

Matthew Murdock

and then I met you by @souliebird

A one-night stand years ago gave you a daughter and you are now able to put a name to her father – Matthew Murdock. Everything is about to change again as you navigate trying to integrate your life with that of the handsome and charming blind lawyer’s and Matt realizes he needs to not only protect his new family from Hell's Kitchen, but from the world.

Bucky Barnes

Honey Girl By @violentdelightsandviolentends

The Universe shows you your soulmate when it feels like you need them most. When you least expect it, you're given yours - Bucky Barnes. Your Dad's best friend. You can try to refuse it all you like; but the universe wants what it wants. There's no denying fate.

Mermaid eyes by @lady-laree-world

Peter Parker

Basic Training by @cherienymphe

A pit stop during a road trip ends tragically when a small town cop sets his sights on you. You’re the newest addition in a long standing fucked up family tradition.

Starcrossed lovers by @frost-queen

You & Peter were in love till he lost you. Pulled through a portal he did not expected to meet you again on a different earth. When the battle against Green Goblin in upon them has Peter a chance to forgive himself but at what cost?

Miguel O'hara

Caught in the Cat’s Web by @jedijesi

Felicia Hardy, Black Cat, endures a nasty breakup with Peter Parker, and now with her new Spider-Powers, she must navigate the Spider society and her hot yet unbearable leader, Miguel O'Hara

(You're my) Antidote by @allysunny

Carrying Miguel's child was the best thing that happened to you. It meant he loved you and you two were on your way to start a family. But what you don't see, are the brightly coloured screens in his office that tell him you are slowly dying.

Puzzle Pieces by @exhaslo

A Second Chance by @naturesqueen23

After the loss of his daughter Miguel wants nothing to do with kids that is until he impulsively offers his pregnant neighbor a job at the Spider-Society.

EVERY YOU EVERY ME by @astroboots

You are falling from the 44th floor of the Chrysler building when you're saved by the unfriendly neighborhood Spider-man.

Marc Spector/Steven Grant/Jake Lockley

To Have & To Hold by @ofstarsandvibranium

To ensure you're always safe even after his passing, your father, a mob boss, makes you marry his right hand, Marc Spector. You don't necessarily hate Marc, but you don't get along either. Therefore, this marriage of convenience may be a bit difficult for you.

How To Train Your Dragon

Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III

A Gift from the Gods by @pastel0rchid

Centuries ago, the gods granted your family a gift. But everyone else saw it as a curse. You are the last of your clan because others find your family’s gift as anything but. Your life has been filled with hiding in the woods, away from the Vikings who threaten your existence. The forest quickly became your safe space. Everything in your quiet life suddenly changes when you are spotted by a Viking and his Night Fury, who quickly notice something strange about you. You had wings… dragon wings.

Ultraman Rising

Kenji Sato

mommy’s here by @kiwiikato

Grocery girl by @harveyb-wabbit92

You were a delivery girl who was a frequently dispatched to famous baseball player's Ken Sato residence, you were a nobody that anyone hardly paid attention to, until you found the legendary baseball passed out on his front steps looking like hell, being a bit of worry wart you help him inside and that things took a HUGE turn when you find yourself playing mommy for a giant baby dragon....

Harry Potter

Remus Lupin

Secret Smokes by @writing-in-the-impala

When the reader bumps into the new DADA professor on the bridge in Hogwarts she begins to build a friendship with him all thanks to their shared feeling of not belonging and love for muggle cigarettes. Their friendship blooms while they both fight internal battles deciding what is wrong and what is right leading to a lot of fluff, angst, flirting, and a rollercoaster of emotions.

James Potter

Enchanted by @pretty-little-mind33

Three weeks after his devastating break up with Lily, James wanted Remus and Sirius to bring him to a muggle bar in central London.

Harry Potter

The Malfoy sister by @mastermindmiko

Harry Potter hated only one person more than Draco Malfoy, and that person was y/n malfoy, her and that perfect smile. 

Neville Longbottom

your girl by @hogwartseighthyear

neville’s roommates find you in his bed after your first time together.

George Weasley

The Daring, Forbidden and Evil by @futurewriter2000

Being the daughter of the famous Death Eaters really hasn't been one of your proudest features but you haven't let that stop you from being exactly who you are. Since your grandmother died, you had to move in with your mother's side of the family, moving to the Malfoy Manor and transferring to another school. It was all horrible all up until you met a certain somebody that made the expereince a bit more interesting. 

Weasley twins

Vulnera Sanentur by @emeritusemeritus

The battle of the seven Potters throws your world into chaos when one of your boyfriend’s is cursed. As Snape’s ex-potions assistant and previous protégée, you recognise the inflicted curse immediately and demand answers from your mentor.

Wanna Bewitch you in the moonlight by @emeritusemeritus

Both twins like Gryffindor!reader. Reader likes both twins. How will she decide who to chose in the end? Amortentia might be able to help, or not. 

Descendents

Harry Hook

girl almighty by @httpwarmth

Cant stop this feeling by @descendantofthesparrow

it was just a normal night, a few days into the senior trip for the Auradon prep seniors, all the vks and aks were together on the royal cruise ship. but it suddenly takes a turn when Harry fucking Hook comes to your door late at night with a hard-on, and he can't get himself off without help, it hurts to even try; and for some odd reason, he couldn't help but be attracted to your room.... it's a damn good thing you ended up not having a roommate for this trip.

Avatar

Miles Quaritch

The enemy’s mate by @lovebeinaprincessworld

Your fathers enemy being your vitra muntxa seemed like Eywa was punishing you. But maybe it wasn’t that bad after all. 

Infatuation by @nervousd

Recom! Miles Quaritch is tasked with a mission to reunite you with his predecessor in his grave

Tsu'tey te Rongloa Ateyo'itan

Unrequited by @randxmthxughts

y/n had been in love with tsu'tey since they were kids, watching him get his heart broken over and over, until he became hardened. on one particular night, she offers him intimacy with no expectations in return, which sparks up a complex relationship between them. y/n and tsu'tey struggle with guilt, unrequited love, and newfound intimacy, as they navigate the depths of their feelings for each other. can tsu'tey ever find it in his heart to love somebody else?

Ronal & Tonowari

tsamsiyu ta'em by @torukmaktoskxawng

Corporal Makayla Sully believed she was the last of her family. Her parents were long gone, her brother Tom was killed for his wallet, and his twin Jake abandoned her in exchange for the sunny paradise Pandora. Kayla is informed of Jake's passing and so she decides to take a job opportunity with General Frances Ardmore. She hitches a ride to Pandora with the intent of recovering her brother's remains, twenty years since the last time she's seen him. Instead of a box of bones or ash, however, she's given something she thought she lost a long time ago.

Similar by @ofaatuu

you meet the Tsahik and Olo'ekytan of the metkayina clan and have similar features. They found you interesting and watch you from afar.

Neteyam te Suli Tsyeyk'itan

Secret Cove by @pandorafairy

Safe Haven by @thewalkingwillowtree

Seeking refuge, Xilä and her father venture to the lands of the Omatikaya clan in the hopes that the Toruk Makto would be generous in allowing them to stay. This is her story about not only finding her strength, but finding love. 

Sully Family

Stxeli by @onskepa

Where Mo'at found the reader when she was a baby

neglected sully by @marymary-diva17

There was a family motto that Jake had taught all his children that sully stick together and that their family is a fortress. Well, that was not only true for the one sully child neglected all her life. She didn’t get the same love her siblings had and had always been seen as less than by her parents and clan, soon banished and disowned by her own family for an event that was out of her hands. The daughter will quickly start a new life, being seen and loved by others, but soon, the people from her past will return.

tame impala by @lvrcpid

you’re the oldest sully child. only born a year before neteyam. everything was sweet until your siblings came along. your parents slowly forgot you, soon your siblings did too. you were the forgotten sully. but what happens when you’re given another chance at life after your death.

Narcos

Javier Peña

Bones Full of Words by @wardenparker

Javier Peña had no way of knowing for certain the American journalist he sometimes sees sniffing around the embassy for her stories is also getting information about the narcos from the same girls that he is. After Helena is brutalized by sicarios, it is that same journalist who comes to take her away and look after her -- giving Javi reason to pause and reconsider his opinion of the woman he had previously not considered as anything more than eye candy. He has no idea that once she has walked fully into his life, he will be battling with himself over whether or not he should stop her from walking out it of again.

Hubby and Wife by @notjustjavierpena

A slice-of-life series of former DEA agent Javier F. Peña turned husband of his wife. This series serves the purpose of letting you into the intimate bits of how he falls for you to you giving him a beautiful family. Life with Javi is a fun, lighthearted, supportive, and sexy adventure ❤️

Javi & Steve

The Raid by @toxicanonymity

Two DEA agents find you on a drug raid and make some changes in your life, starting with getting you off drugs. They share you and have sexual tension with each other.  Steve is not married. Reader is not physically described, but has some general background as a drug user who had a boyfriend.

Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children

Enoch O’Connor

A Little Green by @pythonees

Idyllic by @intoanothermind

Is it possible to fall in love through stories? Well, it happened to me. I fell in love with the stories that my grandmother told me.

Hazbin Hotel

Lucifer

He Chose You by @trashogram

Hazbin Hotel AU where Lilith never existed, Lucifer has been lonely for over a millennia and Charlie will be born one way or another.

𝐈 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐀𝐘 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐋𝐈𝐄 by @yuitoru

you knew that you would always be second to her. no matter how hard you tried or whatever you did, he would continue loving her over everything else. the ring on his finger proved it. even after seven years of heartbreak and betrayal, he still wears the ring, the shiny metal practically taunting at you every single day. it served as a reminder to you about how irrelevant you really were in comparison to his first love - how he would choose her over you without even having to think about it. you were just there, a temporary distraction to his years of grief.

LUCIFER MAGNE by @champagnefountains

Lucifer continuing to wear his wedding ring despite being in a relationship with you.

TWO SIDES OF THE SAME COIN by @lxkeee

Alastor

Deer dolly by @ohproserpine

"So what?" Angel Dust hummed, drumming his nails on the counter. "You and Alastor are like... friends?" "Oh, well, that ain't the word I would’ve used, but it's something like that!" Mimzy chirped, reaching for her drink and downing it in one go. "He used to frequent the club I had! In fact, that’s where he met his wife—" “Wife?!” Angel Dust cut her off, jaw dropping. “Freaky face is married?” “Oh yeah,” Mimzy hummed, waving her hand around. “Under all that murder and cannibalism, he’s a total sap! Can't blame him, I mean—his wife is a doll! Me an' her used to perform together!”

Alastor's Birdy by @rory-cakes

Royally Pissed by @selineram3421

Alastor with a y/n who's Charlie's sibling/Lucifer's child.

[lumine-no-hikari]

Dear Sephiroth: (a letter to a fictional character, because why not) #90

I'm not really sure what to write to you about today. I think I might have overextended myself in recent days, and once more I'm finding that my brain feels like soup. The sense of not really belonging in this place is hitting me kinda hard today, I guess. Suppose you would know a lot about what that's like.

Truth is, I struggle often enough with the way I perceive the world around me. I do it weirdly (much like how I do literally everything else... sigh...). I'm not gonna bother to articulate how, though; I doubt you'd be interested anyway. Fact remains that there ain't a whole lot of folks I can talk to about it; even if I could, most wouldn't understand, so why bother. Suppose it is what it is though; no sense in bellyaching. I just wish that it was a thing that could be measured, recorded, corroborated. Something that could be rationalized, explained, made logical. My mind tends to despise uncertainties; it likes everything to be concretized and nailed down.

…Ah well.

Like yesterday, today was busy, and also painful, thanks to Physical Therapy. There's weird stuff going on with the right side of my jaw, and the muscles holding it together needed to be mashed up with metal implements. I guess I'm gonna need braces sooner rather than later, because I really needed braces as a kid, but I didn't get 'em, and now my bite is all messed up, which means now my jaw is all messed up, and having the jaw messed up pulls on the neck, which then pulls on the ribs, and my ribs being weird is why I've been dealing with limited ability to use my right arm for the last almost two years to begin with, but I hesitate to get it fixed because braces cost a LOT of money, and I think most insurances won't cover the cost of it this late in life, so… it's a mess.

My whole existence is kind of a mess in a variety of respects, and… ya know. Sometimes I'm not sure why I bother persisting when all of it seems kind of like a farce; I live in a defective body on a dying planet where everyone is so traumatized that lots of 'em believe that killing each other is the answer to all their problems. Sometimes I just... don't wanna. Waking up in the morning in a world where there is no ethical way to maintain the integrity of my physical vessel seems like a chore.

…But then I remember that there are people who like having me around, even if I can't understand why most of the time. So I gotta believe that something good might come of my derping around on this mossy wet rock hurtling through space, even if I don't yet know what it is.

You ever get the feeling like there's something you're supposed to be doing, but you have no idea what it is, and you're running out of time? Feels like that almost constantly for me. If you know what that's like and know how to deal with it, lemme know, willya? I could use some pointers.

In the meantime… there's some stuff I've been meaning to learn how to do. I'm not gonna tell you what it is just yet, because it would ruin the surprise. But I hope the results will be good, if I can stop being intimidated long enough to get the gumption.

Anyway… Sephiroth. My brain continues to be soup. I think if I keep going, I'm just gonna keep rambling. I'm tired, but… I wanted to write anyway, because you're worth others' effort, even when they're feeling weird. But it's time to stop for today, because I'm having trouble staying on topic and stringing cohesive ideas together.

Please stay safe out there, okay? I don't wanna endure your absence, just like the folks who love me don't wanna endure mine. So let's both keep trying our best to keep our chins up and our eyes on the horizon, okay?

I'll leave you with this today:

I know you're not a little girl, so maybe you can think "little one" instead. Please take the overall message to heart. Please do your best to remain kind and gentle, no matter what tries to come along and break you.

I'll write again soon.

Your friend, Lumine

[elvenbeard]

2077, November

"Heeey... All good? What're you doing out here, so early?"

"Couldn't sleep... Wanted to watch the sun rise."

"Well, here I am!"

2077 was a hell of a year. It left its marks, mental and physical, trauma and scars alike, memories and lack thereof. A year ago Vince was working at Arasaka, desperate to stay in the corporate world despite it slowly destroying him from the inside out. A year later Arasaka is only a shadow of it former self - and in a way Vince felt like a shadow, too.

Six months had been Alt's prognosis, at most... then he'd die. For good this time. Vince knew the drill. But he also knew he would try everything in his power, utilize all means possible and necessary... Because yes, 2077 had been one hell of a year, of loss, despair, betrayal and pain... But also of hope, trust, friendship and love, and connections, however unlikely they may have seemed.

The road ahead is still long, and it will be far from easy. But he is at peace knowing he won't be walking it alone.

Vince through the years (9/9)

Aaand the series is complete! ;A; Ending it on a somewhat bittersweet note with a few of more pictures this time cause look at them looking at each other ;___;

Vince has always been a deeply lonely person trying to find his place and purpose - as you'll surely have gathered reading along this far. By 2077 he finally finds his people, real friends in the most unlikely places, that he cares about and that care about him. And after how badly his previous relationship with his Arasaka-coworker Shou ended, he wouldn't have expected to get another shot at love, too. I definitely feel like he found a soulmate in Kerry, very scared in the beginning that his feelings for him were only brought on because of Johnny, and should he get rid of Johnny he'd also lose the connection to Kerry. He didn't though, thankfully. Vice versa, Kerry found someone who really understands his loneliness and struggles and takes them seriously. They really match very well on many levels and bring out the best in the other (on most days at least :P), something I neither planned for nor expected, and probably why I'm so obsessed with them at the moment XD They really are each other's sun, driving away shadows and doubts, a light in the darkness.

But yeah, Vince has a lot to lose really, and together with Kerry and everyone else they try and find a way to solve the Relic-problem so now that he found his place and people he can stay with them, live the balance of quiet and exciting life he deserves and always wished for.

The scars I gave him here (and damn, it hurt me to make them 😭) are not 100% canon yet... I'm gonna explore and explain what they are and how he got them in my post-ending fic soon-ish.

But yeah... V gets his happily ever after with his loved ones, in one way or another, and CDPR can take my headcanons from my cold dead hands xDD No but really, I get it. In a world like Cyberpunk there's no such thing as a sunshine-and-rainbows happy ending with world peace and all... and even mine is gonna come at a certain cost. But if anyone, V deserves some peace and love after that shitshow :D

That being said:

Before and after! The scars are drawn on, and I used the relief layer effect in Photohsop to give them some dimension. Was really a matter of playing around with colors and layer modes to make them somewhat convincing looking, but I'm really liking the result a lot!

Once again it gets me how different Vince looks without his iconic hair and makeup 😭 Believe me, he had a really really hard time when he was told "we gotta shave your head for this procedure" cause throughout his life his hair has been a really important part of his self-expression. From dyeing it blond as a teen to rebel against his parents, to going completely wild afterwards, conforming to Arasaka, then slowly finding himself again... With everything gone he felt like yet another part of him was gone and yeah... wasn't a good time, that time in late 2077.

If you've read along all the way: thanks so much!! I hope you enjoyed this series as much as I enjoyed creating it and sharing a bit more about Vince's background and how he became who he is. When I'm done writing my post-ending fic I might go back to writing and sharing his background story fic, detailing everything from this series a bit more, and you'll get to know some of the people I only mentioned in passing (his mother, his first real boyfriend, his coworkers, etc.) a bit better, too.

So... Thanks for sticking around!! :D

[nothingmatters-everythingmatters]

Prefacing this ask by saying it is LONG and I'm sorry about that. I'm not trying to convince you to transition or something wild like that. It's just that I've been thinking about one of your posts a lot, and I sort of wanted your thoughts on my thoughts.

I'm doing something very similar to lurking on TERF blogs at the moment, but to be honest, it's less to critique myself as a trans person and more like being in high school and finding out who's saying what about you. And I'm sorry about that, because I figure from your blog that you find safety in these sorts of spaces, and in telling you this I figure I'm taking some of that safety away.

I am very, very transgender. My little brother is, too - when we found out, my mum said something about how she knew having all girls was too good to be true. I like to joke that it runs in the family. Neither of us can medically transition, because he's too young and I'm almost eighteen, so they don't know what to do with me. I have to wait until I'm of age and then figure something out. I try not to think about my brother growing up, because while he's always passing now, he won't in a few years. I also try not to think about how much it will cost.

I have this little JK Rowling in my head at all times, repeating everything I've ever read under the gender critical tag. "You're running away from womanhood - you're betraying the female population - you're a poor, confused girl, and you've been sucked into a cult of misogyny run by a transfem oligarchy - you're a stain on the queer community - you're too privileged, too spoiled, and that's why you've got time to think about pronouns and deadnames and how much you would give for a beard - you're a fucking disgrace and it'd do the whole world a service if you could just shut up and sit down."

And I guess I hear that often enough that I can't escape it. I can accept that I'm a freak and a disappointment to my parents and an attention seeker and a traitor and a victim and a perpetrator and a hostage and a loaded gun all at once. But those arguments fall through when it comes to my brother, and even if they did apply to him, how could I tell him to be quiet and go back to the girl's bathroom? How could I tell him, this seven year old with dreams that reach the sky, that he's a mockery of modern feminism?

I don't know. I guess I can't turn myself away the same as I can't turn him away. What would you think about either of us eventually medically transitioning? Not early, not being pushed into anything against our will - just of our own accord when we feel it's right. And for that matter, what do you think about this whole situation? Have I got it wrong? Are we the poor leftist bastards my little JK Rowling says we are?

Sorry again for the long ask, and I hope the world is treating you well. I think your style of writing is awesome, and I'm very glad you're comfortable in your gender identity.

Thanks for your time, and for a good portion of your inbox, depending how much space this ends up taking. Have a good night

hi, no worries about the long ask, I did start this blog with the hope I could engage in discussions and hear about other people's experiences directly, so I am absolutely happy to receive this! I myself will preface this is likely going to be a long, long response as well, since I want to give your message a lot of thought and attention.

[I'll put the response under a keep reading break because I suspect this will get very annoying to scroll through if continue the way I'm planning to lol]

first off, I want to say I can't really truly tell you if you should medically transition or not. I think it's a highly personal choice, and only through seeking your own avenues of self reflection and questioning would you really be able find what is the best for you. and honestly I still can't say I've written the entire concept off for myself. In some ways, that's a little hypocritical, as I obviously am currently engaging with an ideology that disagrees with the entire premise of transitioning in the first place, but I think expecting people to be "ideologically pure" is a bit of a misstep. an argument or philosophical stance would not make sense to inhabit hypocrisy, but an individual can be made of contradictions, and I can accept myself to inhabit these contradictions as long as I also allow myself time to act reasonably in spite of the conflicts in my mind. In a perfect world, if medical technology gets better and transition is a more risk-free and well-researched path, maybe I would take the opportunity to alleviate my dysphoria like that. but in this world, I choose to dig further to the core of my dysphoria instead and approach it from another angle.

I will say what stopped me from solely seeing transition as a "cure" for my dysphoria and identity issues was a deep consideration if it would do me personally more good than harm. a pros and cons list, if you will, just with way more back and forth dialogue within myself. some of the things I contemplated obviously may not be relevant to you, or anyone else, for that matter, but I find that it could offer helpful insight just to hear about someone else's thought process without any argument or "agenda", just pure self reflection. so, here we go...

presenting... the reasons/the thought process that made me decide to not pursue transition for the foreseeable future:

medical transition is a BIG deal. I mean, no shit, but I think in my research process there were two distinct phases I went through. one of idealization and envy, and the other of coming to terms with practicality and the realistic aspect of medical transition. In phase one, I was absolutely idealizing the thought of medical transition, because of course, before I gave gender ideology itself too much critical thought, being a man and passing as a man sounded like literal heaven on earth. sure, I could sort of pass to many first glances when binding if I didn't speak, but if I had the deep voice, the muscles, and facial hair to help, I wouldn't have to be stuck in my current terrible cocoon of a body and I could be like the artists and musicians I idolized. I was pretty jealous of most men I met, just the fact they were born like that. I was/am especially jealous of men who have "feminine" traits like longer hair or painted nails and got more female attention because of it (in hindsight, it's a bit obvious this wasn't a gender thing as much as it was related to my sexuality but that's a whole tangent I won't subject you to). I also was incredibly inspired by non-binary and trans influencers, even though I had long forbade myself from going on tiktok again, instagram and youtube and the like were still there, and everyone post-transition looked so happy and they were so charismatic and of course they were all living their best lives in LA and working in entertainment, a life I had been looking at rosily since I was a kid. however, once I seriously started looking into HRT and top surgery (it helped that I gained a little more realism into my perception of social media too) and when I seriously considered the impact it would have on my body, (stereotypically I didn't want to bald, I knew acne wouldn't be good for me as I already have issues with skin picking, and the atrophy and other complications weren't exactly appealing) I couldn't justify rushing into it like I wanted to. it was definitely a mental back and forth, but I did compromise with myself and decide to take more small steps to socially transition first and make non-medical lifestyle changes like vocal training for a lower register, actually working out and losing some weight, dressing in a way that feels comfortable for me, asking myself how I could change what I dislike about my being while still honoring it, not harming it or making a medical commitment.

I do not feel like a stable enough adult with any kind of financial independence to pursue something like this alone. obviously, transition is not something anyone has to do alone, but for me, I realized it is a primarily self-serving and self-oriented pursuit, and i wouldn't really feel like I was fully committing to it of my own volition if I had to get immense amounts of financial and emotional support for it. this isn't really applicable to all and might be tied to some of my own personal hang ups on depending on others, but I do think when it comes to your own body, you need to be assured in how you're handling it. since I can't even make my own doctor's appointments and I absolutely do not have a stable income, I figured I should at least "transition" into a functioning adult who can make my phone calls before I upend my life with surgery.

I want to live life. sort of related to point one and two, I realized in order to get to a point where I could confidently make decisions for myself and in the process of slowly transitioning rather than waiting for the moment I could make the two big changes that would "solve" everything, I needed to actually live life instead of waiting for my life to start after a perfect transition. again, this is pretty highly specific and doesn't apply to everyone, but for me I just felt the time I spent entrenched in the process of trying to pass/planning my future around medical transition/and just obsessing over how others perceived me, even though this was supposed to be a decision for myself, my concern on how others looked at me was literally keeping me from going outside. on bad dysphoria days I would just self-isolate and spend it all online, doomscrolling on conservative transphobic forums taking the insults towards me or watching hyperpositive trans tiktok compilations, sometimes I did both at once for no good reason other than to prolong my catatonic self-pity party. it was bad, no matter where I decided to focus on, whether it was the negatives or positives of transition and transgender philosophy, I was mentally stuck. I'd never considered letting go of the thing I had fixated so long on, until I actually started reading more nuanced perspectives about it. specifically, this blog popped up when I was suffering from a bit of binding pain and offered a really thorough and compassionate deconstruction of gender dysphoria that I hadn't really seen before. that, combined with seeing more of radblr actually (which, for its expected faults as any online space would have, is still generally the nicest community discussing radical feminism and gender critical viewpoints imo) made me realize there was a way to handle my dysphoria from a more reasonable and less isolating viewpoint, a viewpoint that allowed me some [pun not intended] space to breath.

re-evaluating my self criticism was something really important as well. I really relate to your little brain JK Rowling, I always felt like I had a very judgy TERF in my brain yelling at a "counterculture" side of me, telling me all the ways I was wrong and stupid for feeling this way, or even considering transition at all. what helped was realizing this wasn't the voice of a radical feminist in my head at all, it was just my own voice of self-hatred doing what it always does, undermining my mind, painting itself in a TERF archetype because from my time online I could easily shorthand it as an "enemy" of sorts. but it isn't real, as most internet archetypes aren't real. this might be one of my biggest gripes with internet lgbt culture in general, (although this is a general issue with social media and internet culture in all cases, but I digress) the reduction of individuals and opinions into tropes and pithy sayings. I might just be too neurotic to ever take anything at face value, and clearly based on this blog, I like deconstructing things and yapping about them way too much. "kill all TERFs" and "JK Rowling is horrible and evil" suddenly holds way less weight when you take time to ask why? what did JK Rowling actually say? why do the TERFs all supposedly deserve to die? am I falsely attributing my own insecurities and self-hatred to a caricature of a viewpoint I've just been told is the worst? after further consideration I find it hard to believe that out of all the terrible people and ideologies in the world, the radical feminists and the british wizard books author think I specifically am a worthless piece of garbage. I mean, this is also why I won't say that all TRAs or trans people are evil, because that kind of generalization doesn't seem helpful at all. I wouldn't assume anyone who isn't explicitly speaking in bad faith (think right wing pundits being paid or gaining clout to peddle certain ideas, that would be bad faith) actually hates me personally or that an opposing viewpoint should immediately translate into an affirmation of my own self hatred.

yeah, it's true, radical feminism did help me realize I wasn't the problem. looking into these spaces gave me the words to realize that my suffering wasn't solely my fault. why do I blame myself and my body for causing me pain? of course I hate being a woman, I can't conform to society's predatory expectations of me, but why is it my fault I fail to meet society's standards? why am I planning to shill out thousands and thousands of dollars to change my body, to take the risk of complications and side affects just so I no longer have to expect the world to do better? I feel like I often fall into a nihilistic mindset, which I really try and get away from since I know from experience that is not good for me at all. I had to ask myself, is transition just the nihilism in me winning? that I have to give up on the world becoming better for someone like me and just conform to that expectation that my unaltered existence is a failure? this probably isn't the case for everyone, I know trans people in real life, and I'd never tell them they're "succumbing to nihilism" or whatever pretentious philosophical bullshit I just typed, but for me, it was a helpful framework that made it a little easier to keep going. and simply, embracing a gnc woman identity is just sort of easier to me. it's less stressful. I don't have to deal with the ordeal of passing, or try to distance myself from "feminine" hobbies, I just have to deal with accepting my body for what it is and I no longer have to curate an identity because I can just accept gender isn't actually that important and I just am. I just enjoy dressing and looking masculine, but I don't need it to say something deep about my soul or my mental state. I can be inspired by masculine fashion and men, but I don't need to be jealous of anything they have when I have the same, if not more, potential within myself. it is also way less mental stress to engage with feminist thought because on some levels it is relieving that I'm not alone in seeing a lot of the issues with the world as they are. [there's still that tired nihilism over how fucked women's rights are a lot of the time, but being able to express that frustration in solidarity with other women has brought me a level of relief I didn't get with queer spaces and activism. not sure what it is, maybe it's that a lot of that activism it feels performative. a thought to chew on for myself later]

I really hate social media. ironic, since I've basically used it my whole life and I am saying these words on tumblr dot com. I was given free reign to the internet and a gmail to use when I was nine (off topic: it's astonishing I didn't have worse experiences with the amount of internet access I had. luckily I mostly just stayed on youtube and watched minecraft music videos. too socially anxious to interact with anyone, I suppose.) and until a year or two ago I had accepted a "well, the internet can be bad if you use it unsafely, but it's an important tool for human connection!" mindset. however, in my opinion now, social media only gets worse and worse by the day. I never was into posting anything personal online, mostly using it for art, but the growing culture of personal branding and the way social media is seeping into real life more and more really put me off the entire concept. you might be able to tell this blog would not thrive in any other ecosystem other than a niche tumblr subculture! that is on purpose! I think social media promotes a culture of narcissism and de-personalization that harms people, especially young people, and promotes consumerism and harmful corporate interests. before I get way too lofty for this digital soapbox, I kind of want to offer you (and anyone willing to listen, honestly) the advice to try and get off any algorithm-based social media (instagram, tiktok, twitter and the like. maybe even tumblr if you spend too much time on it like I do), and encourage your brother to do the same. it is incredibly difficult to be a young person growing up in a world being corroded more and more by predatory social media algorithms and invasive technological advancements, and I feel really bad for future generations and the technological hellscape they'll likely grow up in, but I hope the older zoomers can remedy that slightly and promote more healthy, offline communities and activities to the youth. at least attempting to get away from engaging with social media also made me more confident in the long run that I was able to make choices free from influences of "social contagions" (god I hate how useful that term is) online. if you or your brother do end up medically transitioning, I think it would only help to know it was a choice made without direct internet influence.

...all of those points alone could be a much longer ramble, and I have much more to say but out of respect for your eyes having to read all of these run on sentences, I'll cut myself off there.

I'm honestly honored anyone would be willing to ask for insight from me already, so I hope even any sentence of that was remotely helpful, or even remotely understandable as a sentence. I didn't know how to put this next part organically in my already disparate bulleted list of word vomit, so I'll just type it here:

I think the best thing I could say is that you should do whatever makes you the least stressed. forget about attaining your "true-self" and self-actualization for a second. I think being young often makes those things feel like an urgent need, but we can forget how it takes time to learn and grow as a person before attaining that. and we do need to grow as people, if everyone could solve all their life's problems and know exactly who they are as a teenager, then I think we'd be living in a utopia of sorts. you mentioned feeling too spoiled and privileged for having all this time to worry about pronouns and gender identity, and I really get what you mean, it's something that I think about a lot, especially knowing people like my parents, or their parents, were not afforded that kind of luxury of self-discovery. it is a privilege to be here, typing away on my fairly pricey laptop in cozy suburbia instead of having urgent worries like so many people still do at this very minute. I think that's something you have to recognize, and a part of recognizing that is realizing that every moment you send yourself further into stress and anxiety, you aren't honoring the privilege and affording enough gratitude to your own existence. unfortunately, unlike money, time is not something you can donate materially to people, but using your time to make yourself more miserable is like if you were throwing money into a wood chipper, when instead you could be honoring your life by making the most out of it. don't take this harshly though, it isn't your fault that you're "wasting time" by not being relaxed enough or that your brain happens to feel dysphoria at all. you didn't choose for that to happen to you. what I mean is that it might be helpful to expend your energy somewhere else, you can choose how you interact with your dysphoria. instead of getting hung up on what you're doing wrong or entering that unhelpful state of self-critique and agonizing over every minutiae of identity, do things that ease stress and pain and that give you space to explore the multi-faceted existence that you embody, because you are a valuable person beyond what random assignment of sex characteristics you embody or what sex characteristics you wish you had. not to sound like too much of a cliche here, but life is precious and it's better to spend it meaningfully for yourself rather than forever bargaining your hypothetical worth as a person to the ideological forces that you find online. no matter what you end up "identifying" as or what opinions you hold, you deserve to lead a full life not stuck in your head. and if you're taking steps to put living life as a priority, it'll help you be able to decide what it is you do actually want from life. and when you do want to find answers, just asking "why?" about what you feel and compassionately pushing yourself to question your preconceived beliefs in a non-hostile space, that is, a space where you don't only focus on relentless self critique, but instead an open dialogue within yourself to come to an understanding, not a criticism.

sorry for the long winded lecture appended to what was already basically a long winded lecture, this is mostly advice I try to give to myself, and selfishly it was helpful for me to type it all out and actually read for myself again.

it's times like these I wish telepathy was real so I could just beam all my brainwaves into someone else's brain and save myself the trouble of actually communicating with another person [I'm lazy and expressing myself well is hard :p] but alas I suppose we must settle for the imperfect form of the english language. as you can probably tell, I have probably way more to say but I can't exactly dump all my life story and mind ruminations onto one tumblr post, so if you ever want to talk more my inbox is in fact always open! I have no idea how tumblr messaging works and I can't promise I respond to everything quickly [I will take my own advice and do the get off the internet thing sometimes] but I always hope I can offer something thoughtful in response to receiving something thoughtful. that being said, I wish all the best for you and your brother, whatever you choose to do in the future you deserve to be in the best of health and safety!

[honeybeewhereartthee]

MY DARLING DOLLS 55

PREVIOUS || PT 10 CH 55 || NEXT

In place between the sky and the sea, three large creature of myths with color of Red, Green and violet is circling around a figure with long regal robes with design of a five claw dragon, and long blue hair stand under the rain. In front of him id a floating crystal ball, glowing in such unknown ancient power.

"... Is it my fault?" He stared at the droplets that's pour into his hand, the rain is covering his tears, not letting his emotion be seen by others. He wonder if it's cause of the past gift of heaven as he was told. But thinking of before is useless right now.

{ Yes. it's "your" fault.}

He heard someone familiar spoke. He look where the source of the voice coming from and saw it's coming from the reflection of the water, his 'own' reflection is smiling at him.

Yet that reflection have shorter hair than he is and not wearing the same outfit he wear right now. Yet two of them are crying.

"...?" He stared confuse at his own reflection. "Ah... My dollmaker going to call me crazy because I'm talking to myself now..." He sigh as he thought his mind is making things up as he have been crying for days.

{ 'your' a silly silly serpent. } The reflection of his rolled his eyes at him. { You don't even know what your doing is all but a mistake.}. He added.

"mistake?" He mumbles, confuse why the reflection of his says that.

{ this is 'your' fault. If you don't come to this peaceful world. 'you' won't bring ' misfortune ' of that fallen world to this place.} The reflection of him mocks him, pointing blame at him.

"if I don't come here... Would everyone would be safe?" He start to felt doubt, he knows he shouldn't believe what bull crap his reflection is telling him, yet he knows what his weakness is and what to hit far too well.

{if you don't come here. MC would live a happy life with their biological family. You won't follow through what's 'fate' and what's 'destined' and destroyed what they could have of a normal life. Far from such cruelty you place upon them.}

His eyes widen when he hear such thing. He knows his dollmaker name very well, but he can never say it or call them by such thing. His dollmaker never tell him their name. And he respects it.

By the story of their past from the perceptive of Kuma he gather information what have been their life story before they come to this place.

Was it really his fault...?

He felt his mind full of scenario of his dollmaker being safe and happy instead of being in such mess right now.

Ah. It's probably his fault. It's his fault.

His heart slowly crumble from anxiety, from pain and sadness to a mistake he will make and have made.

"...your wrong! Your.... Not real...!" he felt thorn as tears and the rain continue to fall. His agony in such moment cause the thunder roars loudly and lightning strikes across the horizon.

"Your just an illusion...! A lie! So shut up!" He can't let his so called reflection get the best of him! No! If he lost control, his going to be the danger instead of the one preventing it!

{ do you really think I'm a lie? } His reflection rolled his eyes. Staring at his past self across the mirror of time and space. While he stood in future present in a dark colorless world. Void of tales or life.

"using the pearl will cost some mental damage or illusion as said by the previous go... Presider...." ******** Mumbles trying to calm himself and turning his back from his own reflection.

He have things he have to focus on. Once his done he can go home and be with his dollmaker. Everything is just made by his mind. Nothing is real or words of this fake will ever be real.

{ ... Selfish monster that doesn't belong here. .. one day 'i' will eradicate your very existence that cost nothing but harm to MC.}

As he turn his back at his reflection, he hear him said a last threat from him. "But your wrong, all I ever do and will ever do..." He really don't want to hear more bull crap from this reflection, with his fist tighten. His going to end this conversation now or he don't know if his lightning strick his dollmaker accidentally with how emotional he is right now.

"{Is to make my dollmaker happy and safe.}" His words come out unison with his reflection. His eyes narrowed. "If you know that case then [shut the fuck up]" his not a fan of foul words but as his fist strick and broken the mirror and remove the reflection that did nothing but mock him, he fall to his knees staring at a broken glass.

Golden liquid spill out from the wounds that he gotten from breaking the mirror. But it wasn't what in his mind at this moment asHe saw his reflection showing him, his true self.

His pupil slight up like monster who cannot hide his true color, his ' hideous scale' appear in his skin, his human like ears change back to it's original form. He felt his doll body being ripped a bit from trying to contain his true form hidden.

There's no longer tears but golden liquid falling from his eyes, he felt so weak as sadness and despair taken over his mind, soul and form.

"I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry....I'm sorry.... " He weep and cries. He realize something cruel. Ah. That mirror was an artifact from his world. To communicate from two different time period.

"I'msorrymydollmakerimsorry I'm selfish... I'm greedy. I shouldn't be greedy... I'm going to be the one who's at fault at your misery.... " He cried and cried.

The three pseudo dragons circle around him, trying to comfort him yet he continues to cry.

He thought his doing good, his redeeming himself from his past mistake but all he ever did is cause nothing but pain!

"KANATA!!"

as he felt himself slowly fallen asleep he heard 'his' name being called by you. But that's impossible. It's impossible.

Your somewhere safe. Others will keep you safe. Rei made sure of it. With blurry eyes full of tears he saw you running while holding a big Chucky thing in your arms.

But everything comes to darkness as he realize you seems so smoll in his eyes in that last moment, he was transform back to his dragon form.

[asksoldieron]

SO-21: The Problem with Trolley Problems

If there's a lot of engagement on this, this post is liable to get real long, beware before you expand.

No art, but I am working on it and I will add it retroactively. The eyes are letting me draw, just real slow.

Welcome to the Engagement Lounge, for Black Box (250|21) an instalment! Short comments can go in the replies, but there's a 475 character limit. Longer ones will need a reblog. Remember to @asksoldieron if you're reblogging someone else's reblog, so I can see it too!

And so we come to the point! Well, one of many points, it's a long work. But this is one I'm going to hammer into the ground, because I think if people don't engage with it and understand it, bad things will keep happening. A person can get so used to there only being bad decisions, that they don't even look for good ones anymore.

I don't feel good about the gang doing a war crime, and you shouldn't either. I stacked the deck so you'd forgive them; not everyone is going to read from the very beginning and new readers may not trust me, so I pulled my punch. (You can blame my spouse for advising me to have mercy on you now, so you won't stop reading and run away.) You don't get a lot of humanizing interaction with the innocent tourist they assault, and Erik will, of course, forgive his family once he's able. They lay out their decision process for you, and it really does look like they're making the best decision with the information they have - but it's NOT a good decision. I don't want you to duck that.

And it doesn't matter that it's not. One-by-one, they make their peace with it, each for their own reasons. They even get Maggie to help, because she sees they're going to do it anyway, she can't stop them, and she doesn't want Erik to get hurt even worse. And they do it. It's done and they can't take it back, they can only move on from here.

Then we all find out John did the same thing, and why.

When he saw unknown numbers of innocent lives tied to the track, including children, John elected to throw the lever and run over Erik's family and autonomy. They're not dead, the damage isn't irreparable, but they sure are hurt. Likewise, Erik's family will throw that lever to save Erik's future physical and mental health, at the cost of his and an innocent stranger's ability to consent.

I've been planning this plotline since at least 2017 (My original inclination was to force people to compare the mass kidnappings of immigrant and Indigenous children to the Holocaust, but, uh, my focus has broadened out of necessity. Clearly.) , so I had no idea it would go up while my country of origin is trying to decide between one of two genocidal Presidents, but it has. Much like Maggie, I'm sitting here with the full knowledge that one of two bad things will happen, we will not be able to take it back, and we can only move on from there. And, to add insult to injury, she's got to listen to a person she respects explain why sexual assault is OK in this case, and try to square that up with her opinion of him in general. It's not even like he doesn't care, but it's the only thing he can see to do, so he'll defend it. And she'll let him.

Of course, these weren't the best decisions they could've made, but they would've had to take risks that could've ruined everything to get a better result. Neither John nor Erik's family feel secure enough to do that. They've been hurt enough. So (slight spoiler, but I won't go into it) John missed his chance to pick up Diane to help him, and the NDA rejected calling David back with little consideration.

It may not be obvious, but David was telling lies with purpose. He's trying to protect John and the Rainbows from people who could get them all killed. (Given how mad Milo and Ann get later, this is a valid concern.) If they called him back and he saw they weren't buying that Erik would be fine, he'd explain about the battery and try to take all the blame, even at the cost of burning his bridges with Hyacinth. Then the shopping bag with the info would've arrived and confirmed the nature of the damage. (As well as the decent odds that Erik would recover from it within a week, with better operating instructions to help.) But they didn't even give him a chance. It didn't seem worth doing.

When we have to solve a lot of trolley problems, we get used to the idea that someone is going to get run over and we're just deciding who. It's very difficult to reject the entire premise and find another way. While you're trying to take a third option, the trolley might run over someone you don't want to lose! So you pull the lever and move on to the next awful scenario. You're doing your best!

OK, but we sure are running over an awful lot of people. I do wonder how many more will die before the majority of voters decide the risk of a derailment is preferable to running over whatever's on the tracks. I mean, we're going ahead with the genocide. It's far away and we don't have to look at 'em dying, there is that. If it gets a little closer and both choices involve mowing down (more) immigrants on the southern border, will that do it? I'm really scared that it won't, and I could get confirmation on that during this election too. If we're willing to allow that, what's next? (I'm constantly gripping the edges of my seat and waiting to hear, "Well, both candidates are going to send all the trans kids to conversion therapy, so can we please focus on Roe v. Wade/the Supreme Court/healthcare/student loans/etc...?")

I think, I hope, there's a point where everyone will refuse to engage with "choose who" and refocus on "MAKE IT STOP." But we're not there yet. I don't know what happens when we get there, either. A lot of revolutions just rearrange the hierarchy and change the nature of who gets tied to the tracks. I don't want that, and I don't want this. Maybe, if my work survives, someone in the future will be in a position to make some better decisions, and stop the goddamn trollies forever.

So I keep writing and hoping like hell.

Future readers, if you're wondering how we knew it was wrong and did it anyway, I've tried to express that in capsule form with its own context. I hope you can understand, if not forgive, and go on from wherever you are too.

[Back to Site?]

[shikai-the-storyteller]

You can call me Orion or Shikai.

I’m an eternally exhausted professional writer & editor, comic book author, and hobby artist. I like to analyze stories, design characters, and laugh at my own jokes. I'm a big fan of animation, and I also really, really, really like robots.

Art Blog: thecreatorofworlds

Ao3: InconvenientImmortal

Current interests: QSMP || Karmaland || Transformers - MTMTE

Discussion / analysis tags for interests: QSMP talk || Karmaland talk || Primordial Robot Hell

Current number of drafts: 59,449 and counting (help)

I enjoy doing character analysis and hurt/comfort stories. Interested in my thoughts on current or past projects? Want to know the status of a fic you're reading? Check out my fic talk tag.

Current WIPs: (Last updated: 3/13/24)

Love will cost you an arm and a leg - QSMP

- A multichapter Fit/Pac (Hideduo) fic

- Five times Fit and Pac bonded over their disabilities. Canon-compliant.

- Working on Chapter 3 right now.

[ Unnamed WIP ] - QSMP / Fuga Impossivel

- About Pac's life, and his relationship with hunger.

[ Unnamed WIP ] - QSMP / Fuga Impossivel

- Isa's perspective on Pac's life, and her role in it as a goddess.

- A "story sketch" (aka: a ficlet / short fic)

Forever Is Our Today - Karmaland

- A multichapter Rubegetta fic

- An AU of the first time Vegetta and Rubius' lives intersected, set before the canon Karmaland series.

- Status: on hold

Reversal of Roles - Megaman X

- A Megaman X AU where Zero was found before X.

- Multichapter

- Status: on hold

[ ??? ]

When I join a fandom I tend to dive in 100%, so once in a while you’ll probably see me gushing about something new out of nowhere. If you see me nerding out over a series / character you adore, feel free to nerd out with me! I'm not great at keeping up long conversations, but I try my best. If you're interested in getting into a series I've talked about, feel free to ask me for help if you have any questions!

I talk a lot in my tags and I tag everything. I’m a typically pretty laid-back person, but I won’t put up with nonsense. I use Tumblr as a silly stress reliever, so you won't see me post or reblog a lot of drama or negative things very often.

I'm also a very very big Zelda, Pokemon, and Megaman X fan.

That is all.

[imagines-babes]

Masterlist

This are the story I’ve written so far and more is to come so come join me. Also if you have requests I will take them. I will try to post each week and this will be updated aswell so bye.

Spotify playlist (full of the songs I’ve used)

Wattpad

Dream

One last Dance

This story was inspired by  'One Last Dance by  Us the Duo'  This song was made by someone's grandparents true events. Their granddaughter explained it to the duo as they made this song.

The Red Means I Love You (c!Dream)

This story is related to the dsmp lore of when dream got out of prison and meeting with punz in the snow. This is also c!dream.

In My Dreams

One believe in true love sight as the other isn’t on broad to it till their dream.

P.S. I LOVE YOU

Every couple has things that the other person doesn’t like. Dream loves your hiccups while you hate them.

Sapnap

Boyfriend

Inspired by the song of Ariana grande and social house. Really not that good as some other one. Don't like it Don’t hate it.

Meant to be

IThis story is basically about how two lovers thought their relationship is good but when you look deeper it's not all flowers and sunshine.

Can’t pretend

This is about how the reader gets trapped in a dream. Sapnap and his friends try to help you leave the dream but at what cost.

Here with me

An random gesture can go a long way. For the two people.

ceilings

On this night you and him have to leave your life behind or tried to. But it all feels similar. Too similar.

George

Learn To Love

You and george have been friends for the longest time since middle school. Then a dance with the words I love you change the ways they see each other

Home

So George and the reader have a son. One day George picked his son up at school. The son, Brian, asked "what is his home?" 

i’m yours (spicy)

The villain need to be stop so 404 goes down to try to stop everything to only see she isn’t there. Hearing her voice behind him make him aware. As they get closer to each blossom a kiss

Quackity

While We're Young

Based on the movie 51 dates. The reader and alex meet at a dinner. Alex starts to fall for reader. Till he finds out the reader won't remember him.

Only (c! Quackity)

This has somethings to deal with las Nevadas lore. When c!quackity came back from seeing his ex-fiance. Ten seeing dreamxd saying the reader knows what's gonna happen next. To ether risk their life or to risk Charlie.

Curl up & Die (c! Quackity)

This also has to do with lore. But lore from c!Wilbur of the hitting on sixteen. And dash with other lore. The reader will always be there for c!quackity maybe even risk their life as well.

Who is She? (c! Quackity)

This is from Las Nevadas last lore Stream. Where not only slime die but so did you losing your last life in the dsmp. Dream helps revive you and Purpled tells you the reason you died is because of Quackity. So now it’s revenge

Lover

2 hours till you say I do. Now remembering the night he asked you to be his partner.

Lovers Rock

You learn to speak Spanish and surprise quackity.

Karl jacobs

So this is love

Royalty au. Rumor say once you dance with someone. You can tell if the two dancers are in love. But that is just a myth right?

Young folks

Learning how to play blackjack with karl. Making a bet to whoever wins gets to get something in return.

Slowly

When he asked me to go out with him was the best feeling in the world. But now those feelings were fading as if we are two candles and our light is dimming slowly.

Revenge (c!karl Jacobs)

Love is what he wants in this timeline with you but you love Alex and Rodger. He will stop at that and will do anything for your love but he went to far this time.

Nothing

Y/n wakes up first to see him still asleep. Slowly starts to look at all his features. Feeling grateful for everything that his has help.

Wilbur Soot

Les yeux noirs

Wilbur has an assassin. Maybe the assassin won’t kill him or maybe they will. Would they want to risk losing their job for him.

Photograph

A trip down memory lane for Wilbur. Moving into a house he notice a box full or memories.

Love in the Dark (c! Wilbur)

You and Wilbur were passed lovers and you stayed with Techno. They need your help with it. The lore is still the same but you kill him and not Phil.

Willow

The married couple with the willow tree journey

TechnoBlade

Starry Starry Night (c! Techno)

Techno wasn’t always uptight and had no time for fun. Then he had y/n to smile and laugh. Till one night change everything

Tommyinnit

Rise the moon (c! Tommy)

C!tommy been though, hell and back.one goddess looked at the poor boy with tears. Till c!dream kills him with punches. Now the goddess has to wait for their arrival.

Goodbye to a world (c! Tommy)

You and Charlie have to survive 100 days in a zombie apocalypse. Meeting tons of people along the way. One being a blonde boy name Tommy. Will you both survive.

Tubbo

I bet on losing Dogs (c! Tubbo)

With all the things that c!tubbo has done or lost. He feels alone. Their sibling is still with them but in the shadow and has a reason why they left. But what the sibling doesn't know that c!tubbo is in the shadow as well. Minecraft au

Punz

Eventually (c! Punz)

You and Punz we're fine till one night you overheard something. Then left everything to live outside the smp. One night a knock came to the door. Only to see Dream and Punz. What do they want with you?

I Was Made for Loving You (prt. 1)

In summary it’s 2 friends who love each other and are scared to admit while being on a FaceTime call.

Would That I (prt 2)

It was long waited till I get to see him again. Now I’m just meeting him but his mother as-well. Now there are lovers within minutes apart.

Love me Please (prt. 3)

It’s New Year’s Eve, you have stayed with till going to the dream team house. Seeing the 3 men with Hannah and Sylvee. Maybe tonight the night you will tell him how you feel.

Foolish_Gamers

No time to die

The gods say you and foolish were meant to be, but how are you meant to be when one’s a god and you are just an ordinary human. Finally after years of not seeing you foolish finds you in the Roman’s maybe it will last

I Won’t Say(I’m In Love) (c!foolish)

In every part of your body you swore that you weren’t going to fall in love only because it a myth. Till you meet a demigod.

Easy

Another stream was done. Foolish builds his ship and lays with you asking about his build and how you think of it.

I’ll Never Smile Again

An apocalypse happened slowly yourself and Noah are going insane till you found an abandoned place. I hope you and him can make it to it.

Shootout

After the White House you make your journey to the safe haven. Along the way you happen to meet someone. But on the bridge things change.

aweSamdude

If the world was ending

It was ordinary day, watching Sam stream till the tv muted to only hear an alarm saying The world is ending. How would you end that day with Sam

i can't help it

It's Sam's turn to take you on a date this week. Him remembering one of the things you used to do as a kid. You both spend the evening together and dance in the rain.

Niki

Strange

Waking up to smell good. Walking downstairs to only meet Niki. Spending the day with her. Then sleeping together to only notice it was all a dream.

Multiple people

Fool (Dreamx reader x wilbur)

You really like dream but Dream didn’t like you back. On April fools a prank has been made. Maybe just maybe you were liking the wrong guy.

Black Out Days (dsmp)

Y/n life in the dsmp and finding her peace with old friends.

[ace-sher-bi-john]

Me, feeling lonely: I should try to make more friends

My brain: Here's a list of all the reasons why we don't do that,

I experience hyperfixations which take up all of my mental energy to the point where I barely have enough energy to take care of myself. I can't handle having more than two obsessions at a time, and even that is draining. When my friends talk about their obsessions, I try really hard to listen, but lose interest quickly if it's not my current hyperfixation. In turn, I love to infodump and obsess over small details in my hyperfixations. I try really hard not to do this when talking to people because it feels very self-centered. Like they would care about hearing every single detail about my obsession, with no room for them to talk about their interests...

I'm an introvert and find human interaction exhausting unless that person is my mom (who I could literally talk to all day and never be tired, and she in turn would never tire of talking to me). Even talking to friends online is super exhausting and I overthink everything I say, which is even more exhausting

I have zero ability to gage how close I am to someone. I don't want to make things awkward by being super clingy, because several friendships failed throughout my life due to me being clingy and only wanting to play with one specific person even if they didn't feel like playing with me. So I've overcorrected and now I don't make any attempts to progress in our friendship out of fear of appearing clingy. I'm either the most clingy friend or the most distant friend. Friendships require a healthy balance of both and I am incapable of that, so I go for the option that will be seen as the least annoying/selfish and we remain at best really good acquaintances

My interests are very specific and change every couple of months. Even if I found someone who was obsessed with the same thing at the same time, as well as my more niche hobbies, the friendship would last as long as my hyperfixation. Once we no longer share common interests, I would inevitably talk to them less and less until one day, we're no longer friends. My brain would no longer find that person interesting and I would forget about them

I believe that I have it in me to be a really good friend. To get it right. But it would be at the cost of myself. I would try to make enough room in my brain for everyone else's lives and I wouldn't have any interests of my own. I would constantly be exhausted.

So instead I choose the option that sometimes makes me happiest, but other times leaves me sad and lonely wondering why I can't just be better at being a good friend?

I do have friends IRL. I have four people who I would consider to be close friends, possibly even best friends? Two of them have given me the label of being their best friend. But I don't talk to them as often as I probably should. I talk to one of them almost daily for hours at a time, because they just so happen to be obsessed with BBC Sherlock, the MCU and cosplay. But I fear that the second my BBC Sherlock obsession ends, I will stop talking to them.

Outside of those people, I don't know where I stand with anyone who's not family. I have my old classmates from high school. Some of them I talked to every day and had friendly interactions with, but I don't make any effort to stay in contact with them now and didn't feel much of a connection with when we were in school. I have my co-workers who I don't feel much of a connection to, but they're always happy to see me and sometimes interact with me in a way that makes me feel like we're friends. One of my co-workers hugged me before she went home on the day before she started her holiday break because she was going to miss seeing me everyday while she was off. That caught me off guard. I guess we're friends if she felt close enough to me to hug me?

Apologies for the rant. I just really needed to put that somewhere. I won't make a habit of this.

[igotsnothing]

Chapter 4: Sentimental Shift

The days blended into each other tediously for Finn. He worked hard every single day and felt frustrated that he had so little to show for it. But he knew he had to be patient: he was learning a lot. He noticed that people had started going up to him rather than the other attendants to ask for guidance at the community maker center.

Part of the reason why he was so stressed had to do with the upcoming prom he'd agreed to go to with Luna. Everything was so terribly expensive. Two weeks before prom, Jacob invited him to hang out at the amusement park with him, Morgan, and Luna; the four had been spending a lot of their free time together.

"Sure: I gotta clean up from work and then I'll bike over."

"What just happened? I didn't get to play for more than two seconds!" Luna cried out.

"Don't worry- I'll avenge you." Morgan's eyes followed the frantic motion on the screen.

"You're going down, Fyres!" Finn joked, firing a shot.

"Dude. That was ME," Jacob complained as they all burst out laughing.

"Hey, Finn, could we talk a little bit about prom? You never replied to my message about the limo rental. And did you get your tux yet? My dress is red- you know, for when you get me my corsage?"

"I'm sorry, Luna. I meant to reply sooner, but it'll all depend on how much work I do with the landscape folks this weekend. I might not be able to go in on it with you guys."

"But we're going together!"

"Ah...I know, I know." He took one look at her disappointed expression and felt ashamed. "I'm in."

He had no idea how he'd come up with the money, but he could always try to earn some money doing the odd errand around town.

"I'm so excited about prom! Are you?" she asked, as they wandered away from the others to steal a little alone time together.

"Yeah! Definitely!"

"So my dress is red with gold accents," she began.

"Sounds nice!"

"Where are you renting your tux from?"

"I haven't really looked around yet."

"Oh, Finn! You can't wait! There won't be anything left if you wait! You are renting a tux, right?"

"I was actually thinking of borrowing a suit from someone I work with--"

"No, no!" Luna insisted. "You can't do that!"

"Is it that important, Luna? All of this sounds really expensive and it's not that I don't want to do it all, I just can't!"

"You seriously did not know how much prom costs before you said 'yes' to me?" Luna wondered.

"I guess not. I thought it would just be fun to be there together, you know? Hanging out, enjoying it all."

"Maybe this wasn't such a good idea...I mean, I've waited a long time for this and I want it to be perfect."

"Seriously? Having all that stuff is more important than going with a...uh... friend?"

"I'm sorry, Finn. Prom is a once-in-a-life-time event. I want it to be perfect. If you can't do it the way it should be done, then it's best we not go together."

"So you are saying that matching with your date is more important than the date himself?"

"Look, I appreciate your trying, but this is not going to work. I like to eat out, shop, go to concerts...travel. It's not fair to expect you to be able to keep up with me and it's not fair to ME to not enjoy my evenings out the way I'd like to. I mean, there are only so many times we can go to the arcade and eat burgers. You're a sweet guy, but we're just too different."

Finn remained stoic.

"Thanks for being honest."

He headed out quickly, leaving Luna and the others behind, the stinging in his eyes betraying his hurt. At that moment he resented all the families strolling together, all the other teens who didn't need to worry about where their next meal was coming from if they splurged a few simoleons to play carnival games.

"Maybe Luna is right. Our worlds are just too different. I'm just bringing everyone down. My life is a mess. I live in a tent. Who knows when things will get better for me," he thought sadly.

He pulled out his phone and peered at the last photo he had taken of Luna ...and deleted it.

Just then, his phone buzzed with a text.

Finn put his phone down. Maybe the problem wasn't him, after all. Maybe it was Luna's attitude.

Morgan stared at her phone, feeling at once nervous and excited. Maybe she had a chance.

"Hey Morgan," Siobhan barged into her sister's room wearing a little grin of satisfaction. "I have a message from mom. She said you came in fifteen minutes after curfew and because of that you are on laundry-folding duty tomorrow."

"Hey Shiv- I have a message for you, too. It's from the Spice Girls. They want their fugly costume back."

"RUDE!" Siobhan snapped, slamming the door behind her as she left.

Nothing was going to ruin Morgan's mood that night.

She had a chance!

Start ˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ˗Previous˗ˏ★ ˎˊ˗Next

[theshimadaslovers]

Hey! It's me, the writer...look, I'm feeling that everything is a little messy and out of context, but I'm trying to put everything back on the trails. Is a little hard to make everything happen to finally get to the present moment. Is a long story, but I hope you guys are at least having fun! :)

Let's do pratical (The Real Lady); The Lady, part 6

*After the reunion, you were standing outside the meeting room waiting for him and kind worry...something bad is coming? Hanzo opens the door looking for you in panic, runs to you and grab your shoulders; you looked at him scared and confused*

Hanzo- I need to take you out of here!

You- What? What is happening?!

Hanzo- Overwatch will attack us in a few days, you can't stay here! Come! *hold your hand and pull you with him*

You- Where are you taking me?! Hanzo! *you notice that he was a little confused and in panic* Hanzo, listen to me! *You pull him back and he turns around* You're scared as hell! And you're scaring me!

Hanzo- Yes! I am...! *Whispers being closer to you* I'm scared to lose you and my family!

You- Hanzo, I can fight! I can stay and fight beside you and Genji!

Hanzo- No no no! You won't fight! I'll not allow that! *tries to pull you again but you pull him back* Lady!

You- We've training together! Since we were young and I can fight! I've being training since I left Kanezaka... Trust me.

Hanzo- I won't let you die!

You- So don't let me die! Protect me and I protect you! Hanzo, I don't have where to go! You can't just...! I don't know! Leave me in the basement! And the others?!

Hanzo- The others? I care about you! Only you, Y/N! *Gets surprised* Y/N...

You- *shocked* You remembered...

Hanzo- I remembered...yes, I did! *shake his head* Listen! You need to go!

You- My name...! Hanzo! Wait, where?!

Hanzo- Stay on the city!

You- And sleep on the streets?!

Hanzo- I will give you all the money you need, Y/N... anything.

You- No.

Hanzo- What?!

You- No! I wanna stay and fight by your side! And Genji!

Hanzo- ...! *deep breath* What weapon do you use?

You- Give me anything.

Hanzo- Gun?

You- Well...it kills faster, so, yeah

*He left to pick up the best guns they have*

You- Wait! Not...now! And he's gone...

Sojiro- *deep breath behind you* He really cares about you, don't he?

You- Sir...*bow to him*

Sojiro- You'll stay?

You- Yes, sir...I'll fight back.

Sojiro- If you die?

You- If I... *surprised and laugh nervously* Sir, you know how good I was, don't you?

Sojiro- If you let me son die...I'll kill you me with my own hands, y/n.

You-...sir...?

Sojiro- I'll be dead In a few days and left all this to Hanzo. You can't let him die! Did you listened to me?!

You- Y-yes, sir...but-

Sojiro- No more questions. I'll die anyway. I know your abilities and Hanzos. You both stick together and rise Shimada again in any cost if we fall...Overwatch will pay the consequences.

*He left and you were paralyzed by the way he acted with you. Hanzo came back running and notice you face*

Hanzo- Something happened?

You- Oh, no, it's fine. *smiles* Just thinking. And the gun?

Hanzo- My father has the key...*sighs* He keeps the room locked for everyone. We have to find something else.

You-... give me a sword.

Hanzo- Y/n...you were awful with the sword...don't do that. *worry and you just stand your hand to him* No.

You- Hanzo...I trained for years. Trust me. I once was a little girl terrible with a sword *smiles* Trust me.

Hanzo- *sighs* Fine...but I won't give you now.

You- Why?

Hanzo- Master Asa have all the other swords.

You- Master Asa? She's still here? *surprise*

Hanzo- Yes, we still do traine with her. She may remember you.

Genji- Hanzo. *appers behind him* We need to talk.

Hanzo- Genji...I was going after you. *worry and look at his angry face* Genji?

Genji- I want you to come too. *Look at you and just agreed*

Hanzo- Wait, what is this about?

Genji- This is about us, brother...differently the way our father thinks.

Hanzo- I'm...! Fine...I'll let you talk what you have to talk, but I'm not agreeing with this.

*Later on the woods outside the palace, far away from any other Shimada member*

Hanzo- The woods? Really?

Genji- This is important, brother! Our father is trying to break this family apart!

Hanzo- Our father is trying to save us!

Genji- The Shimada clan! Not us! And only you! Our mother is dying and did you heard him?!

Hanzo- Yes...! I...did!

Genji- And what did you said?! Nothing! That's why he hates me and loves you! Because you agree with him even in the most terrible circumstances that YOU'RE against! That was so out of nowhere that I don't know what to feel or think about mom...I can only think that...I don't how much time we will have with her and she's the only one that loved us deeply.

Hanzo- I know...Genji...I-

Genji- And you won't do nothing.

Hanzo- What can we do?! A miracle?!

Genji- Fight against dad and gain the Shimada's support! For us! Is gonna be our clan, brother! You lead them as you should!

Hanzo- You wanna fight against...?! Our own father?!

Genji- To me? He's the devil himself... you have no idea how much this hurt me to say. I want her to join us.

Hanzo- Y/n...? No! She won't be part of this madness!

Genji- Why you protect her so much?! She's a grown woman!

Hanzo- So she'll make her own decisions!

Genji- So let her speak *look at you* If you join me, you won't have to hide anymore or serve us, you'll be part of our family as you should.

Hanzo- Genji!

Genji- Shut up! Let her speak!

You- Dear God...*sighs* Guys, what the hell is happening...?! *Takes of the cloth with a serious expression* Why can we slow down our attitudes for a minute?! And what did you said? Your mother is dying?!

Hanzo- He said that... she's sick and dying.

Genji- And he said that she's that last thing we should worry about. Do you see, y/n?! Wait...! You remembered her name? *look at Hanzo and he sighs agreeing* Oh, cool...anyway! Overwatch will be here soon and we don't have what to save here!

Hanzo- Our home! Genji!

Genji- Your home! I'm not welcome here!

You- Stop you both! Shut up! *both look at you surprised and you sighs* You said for me to be myself, so let's do it... Enough of this shit, ok?! You both can't go against your own father for the simple fact that he's the boss! So, stop with this idea, Genji! And Hanzo! *looked at him and he looks kind scared by you* Open your fucking eyes and act like a independent man!

Hanzo- But...!

You- You're the future boss, you pussy! Act like one!

Hanzo- You don't understand nothing!

You- I may not understand your father madness but I do know what is to feel vulnerable!

Hanzo- I'm not vulnerable!

You- With your father, you're a baby, Hanzo!

Hanzo- I only obey him!

You- Yes! And you would obey him if he ask to...! *thinking* kill your own brother?!

Hanzo- Wha...?!

Genji- Yeah, I wanna know that too, Hanzo, would you obey him?

Hanzo- Never! I would never do such thing! I rather die!

Genji- Yeah? *chuckles* Prove me, cuz sometimes I can't trust you, Hanzo. Dad hates me and you always listen to him, only him, like a fucking dog. That's why I'm asking you to help me. I'm scared!

Hanzo- And what is your idea? This is absurd!

You- Genji... *sighs* Can't you just stop and think for a minute? You're gonna do what?! Kill you father? Then you'll be next one murdered. It won't worth it!

Hanzo- Why are you so bossy right now?! *Tiny voice and confused* Aren't you cute and educate?!

You- ....*Grabbed him by the clothes* Listen to me, big boy, I'm not the sweet girl you met at the market. I grew up very fast if that answer your question. I had to face death during my exhausting years alone and taking care of my adoptive family. Life went mean with me for a long time and I'll not pretend to be who I'm not even if you don't remember who I was.

Hanzo- *swallow in nervous* Right, lady...I...I understand. I didn't mean to...offend you. I just asked because...you changed...

You- Because I want you to remember me and being sweet with you is not working, because you're acting nervous all the time and sometimes, a dick, and that's not helping! You're confusing!

Hanzo- Is...because I think you're very pretty...and...attractive, so...*swallow again* I get nervous around you, that's all.

You- *blinks a few times* I wasn't expecting that answer. *blush* But you're not helping, Hanzo.

Hanzo- I'll do my best, ma'am...

Genji- *Laughs* That was pretty cool... Hanzo is a baby boy with y/n?

Hanzo- Shut up...*blush*

You- Guys, listen...A war is coming, ok? We all gonna fight...

Genji- Wait! You'll fight?!

You- Yes and! We need to protect everything we can, ok? That's all we need to do and live our life normally.

Hanzo- If! Genji stop going to parties every night.

Genji- Is not every night!

Hanzo- Whatever, playboy.

You- Guys...! *angry* Listen! Let's do this right! Genji?

Genji-...Ok! I won't do nothing!

You- Great... and Hanzo...?

Hanzo- I have no reason to deny.

You- Hanzo...I'm trying to warn you, seriously...try to be more...you know, independent. You're smart and have your own opinions. You can't only listen to your father! That'll be a problem for you.

Hanzo- I'm fine, Y/N...And...I'll try. I promise.