#i dont wanna break her heart though... HELP

[nathanprscott]

deciding who to date has never been harder than in baldur's gate..

[no-droids]

Another Rough Day

gif credit @chrishemsworht

Part Twenty of the Rough Day Series

Rating: Explicit

Word Count: 13.7K

Warnings: Angst, violence, canon-typical blood and gore, language, hurt/comfort

A/N: i wanna thank yall for sticking around during my hermit era, in the time ive been gone i am now officially a junior at a university majoring in aerospace and it’s a fuckin nightmare and i hate everything and god help us all literally kill me and I will be posting INCREDIBLY slowly because of that (I’m talkin weeks or months in between updates yall, im sorry I can’t dedicate more time to this but I am going to finish this fic within the next handful of chapters idk maybe 5 or 6 so you shouldn’t have to wait too too long).  As a heads up there will be hard angst as we enter the final arc, there will be hurt and it’ll get dark but everything is gonna turn out alright so thanks for sticking with me and continuing to stick with me. im sorry if you dont like it or your expectations were subverted or if this isn’t what you’d hoped it would be after following and waiting around for so long but this was planned a long time ago and it took me a good year or two to recognize that I started writing this fic for me and now I’m going to end it writing for me and I hope yall can respect that

ALSO I asked my best BEST FRIEND in the entire world @cptnbvcks to collaborate with me for this after we both took a very long break from creating and she drew some GORGEOUS artwork for this chapter so it will be posted at the end, everyone please go follow her and say hello

ps brittany girl you’re a fuckin menace i had to use my own two ears and listen to ethan literally say the words “the mandalorian cums, hard” what the fuck was that im actually suing

anyways chapter below the cut lets get serious yall

---

You take two of them down before they even realize they’re being attacked.

Your aim is as swift and steady as if Din were behind your shoulder right now, calmly pointing out which stationary tree to hit next in rapid succession.  You’re positioned perfectly at the bottom of the ramp to take full advantage of the ambush, the only thing running through your mind is strategy and the constant calculating of angles and ricochets.  The other three troopers are trapped inside the open Crest and you’re right next to a large boulder that you can step behind for cover, but it proves unnecessary as the rumors were apparently true.

They’re… awful.

Not a single blaster is even fired in your direction—you think you see maybe one panicked red shot bounce around in the hull, but that’s it.  The troopers fumble for their guns and trip over each other at the unexpected attack—a few scream like children through the modulators, but you’re temporarily deaf to anything besides the screech of your weapon hitting its target and the crumpling of armored bodies.

Later on, if someone were to ask you to describe exactly what happened—who died first, who ran for cover, who cried out for help—you don’t think you’d be able to.  You don’t even really feel like a person right now.  The entire thing is cold, robotic survival instinct, pure ruthlessness rising in your soul for the first time in your life.  It feels sick.  Wrong in your bones.  Born from preemptive defense in fear of your life, but that doesn’t mean you stop.  Not until all of them stop moving.

You empty the entire fucking canister for a handful of stormtroopers, firing plasma and char marks across every square inch of the pristine hull even after the last one drops.  Your heart is beating too fast, your finger keeps pulling the trigger multiple times even after the blaster clicks uselessly, completely empty and beeping a warning that it must’ve begun emitting ages ago.  Being out of ammo scares you—you suddenly feel vulnerable, even though the very far away logical part of your mind reminds you that they have to all be dead at this point and no physical threat was ever able to graze you.

Regardless, you quickly spin behind the boulder and grab another canister from your belt, giving it a spare check for leaks while the empty one slides and drops to the rocky ground.  It’s the first time you’ve ever had to reload this weapon instead of just pointing and shooting, but the mechanics are relatively simple and your brain makes up for your lack of coherent thoughts with lightning fast perception.  What's difficult is that your hands are starting to shake now that you’re not aiming, you’re not breathing correctly because you’re not really breathing at all.  You can’t tell the difference between the adrenaline-fueled dissociative silence that muffles everything around you or if it really is just that quiet now.  No more clatter of armor, no modulated voices or terrified screams.  No blasters, no footsteps along the ramp, no birds singing.

You quickly pause to lift your elbow and check the enormous eyes blinking up at you, tiny claws still holding tight to the fabric of your tunic and completely unharmed, and then you force yourself to move.  The blaster is held out in front of you while you walk forward and your finger rests on the trigger, begging to be pulled again.  It’s suspenseful and terrifying in a different way than before—now it’s less about psyching yourself up for confrontation and more about the fact that any sudden movement could mean your very swift end.

Silence.  Silence.  You’re numb and raw at the same time, walking up the ramp as your eyes fly everywhere, not even registering the blood or gore, just searching for movement.  You don’t know if you feel like a predator or prey, you’re that much more brutal and inhuman because of how fucking terrified you are.  You count four stormtroopers in the hull laying crumpled and still on the metal floor, but the one in the far corner only has blood on his shoulder.  You quickly swing the blaster around to remedy that, but then—

“P-Please don’t kill me!”

His words remind you of something.  Reality, maybe.  A world outside yourself and the kid’s survival, the living beings behind the bloody armor your enemies wear.

It’s a miracle your finger stays hovering over the trigger, and you watch him throw the blaster at your feet with a clang and scramble to show you his empty hands.  “Please don’t kill me, please don’t kill me—I’m not loyal to the Empire, I don’t want to be here, please, I don’t want to die, I don’t want to die—”

Behind the mask, your expression furrows.  Stormtroopers are loyal to the bitter end, what is he saying?  They embrace their expendiality, it’s the only thing that makes them any sort of a real threat.  Kuiil told you horror stories about them during your childhood, the cloning facilities and the propaganda they’re force fed since infancy.  It’s nearly impossible to find one who hasn’t been raised from birth to serve the Empire, no matter how crumbled and trace its remaining authority may be.

No, this is a trap, it has to be.  Your expression twists with dread after hearing him speak, readjusting your aim with the blaster and preparing yourself for the years of nightmares that’ll follow—but then he cries out, “Wait!” and then removes his helmet with trembling hands.

You pause, staring down at him in shock.

It’s him, you recognize him immediately.  It’s the same face from a hologram puck you bore into your memory, spent multiple days staring at so you’d be able to spot him under any disguise or circumstances.  Oshua Ryler.  Your quarry, the fifth puck, the one Din was out Maker knows where searching for before this entire mess happened.  A stormtrooper?  His puck said nothing about the Empire, this doesn’t make any sense.  What is he doing here?  Stormtroopers don’t have pucks, they don’t have bounties or relatives or loved ones searching for them.  They’re brainwashed, replaceable, faceless soldiers in suits of armor and they don’t even have names.

“Please don’t kill me,” he begs again, staring at you with wide eyes even as he cowers.  “I have a family, I-I just want to go home, please—”

“Shut up.”  You can’t think straight with him crying like that and you’re wasting so much time just standing here trying to process when your brain had to literally shut itself down to even do the things you’ve already done.  You have to kill him and escape, you have to—you can’t trust this complication, not with the tiny claws currently digging into your back and reminding you of your purpose, but it was so much easier when he had on a helmet.  You hate looking at his face.  It’s going to haunt your dreams now, just like the man you stabbed on Corellia.

“Please don’t kill me—please don’t kill me,” he screws his eyes up and breathes over and over instead, and your stomach wrenches with disgust.  His posture and expression are so fucking pitiful, you can barely keep your eyes on him through the overwhelming nausea and aversion that climbs up your throat.  He’s with the Empire, and they’re looking for the baby.  You know what needs to be done.  Pull the trigger, just one small movement from you and it’ll be all over.  It would be the easiest thing in the world, it would be so easy.

But then instead, you ask, “Why are you a stormtrooper?”

“I’m n-not—I hate the Empire—”

“The Empire is ashes.”  You don’t know if you’re yelling or whispering with how much blood is roaring through your ears.  “They hold no power anymore.  Why are you with them?”

“Because the one thing they have left is money!”  The quarry shrills the words at you, ghostly pale to the point of turning green.  “Th-They buy troopers now—they opened up a whole new market for the smugglers, there’s a base nearby that’s used for training and…”  He stares wide eyed at you and gulps.  “C-Conditioning.”

Your brain is already going a trillion lightyears an hour and it doesn’t have the capacity to empathize or understand anything beyond the child’s survival and the relevant details right now.  “Were they expecting the baby?”

“W-What?”  He squeaks up at you.

“Was the bounty put out on you a trap set by the Empire?”  You ask him, lifting your free arm just enough to flash him the tiny child clinging to your side.  “He said they’re coming after the baby, so tell me if this was planned from the beginning.”

“Who is ‘he’?”  The stormtrooper asks, furrowing his eyebrows and looking around.  “What are you talki—”

“Tell me if the bounty on you was a trap to take this baby!”  You roar, your blaster shaking as you aim it down at him.  Your mind is acutely focused on the tiny claws hanging onto your tunic, the continued safety of the kid and the life or death situation facing him that you were given absolutely no information about.  “Now—”

“If it was I didn’t know!”  He quickly cries out, pleading with you and clamping his eyes shut in terror under the barrel sight.  “I don’t know anything about a b-baby, or a bounty!  They just put blasters in our hands and told us to search for a ship and to bring back anyone we find alive, I swear!”

You’re silent for a moment, biting your lip under the mask and caught halfway between discerning and stalling.  You could still kill him.  You should still kill him, time is ticking down and more troopers could be heading this way any second.

Shit.  “Who put the bounty out on you?”  You ask sharply.  It might not be a completely fair question, but he can’t exactly blame you for not feeling completely fair right now.

“I—I don’t know,” he gasps, clutching his bleeding shoulder.  “Could’ve been anyone—my mother, Cyra, o-or my dad, Obediah, or Thia, or Benja, or S—”

“Thia,” you interrupt his rambling, catching the slurred word and repeating it back to him.

“Yes!”  Oshua jerks his head up, tears and hope immediately filling his eyes at the sound of her name, “Yes, Thiadura Celi Ryler, that’s my sister!”

Maker, if he’s lying, then he’s fucking brilliant at it.  You look towards the cockpit of the ship, biting your lip under the mask.  Get to Nevarro, tell Karga and he’ll… something.  Din was cut off before he finished.  Help?  Know what to do?  You’re lost, but you have a clear directive and the precious seconds are sliding by.  The controls are right up there, two steps to the ladder and less than a minute until you’re rising into the atmosphere.

But then you think back to the terror in Din’s voice.  The blistering panic that made him speak faster and with more urgency than you’ve ever heard from him.  Get to Nevarro.  Tell Karga.  Get to Nevarro.  Tell Karga.

You look back at the quarry.  “How many of you are there?”

“At the base?  Around three hundred,” he immediately spills.  “Half of us are in the hole right now getting brainwashed, they do it in shifts, but they can be mobilized in a few hours.  There were a lot of bodies outside when we were ordered to split off, maybe a third of our squadron, but the rest were still shooting at whatever was—”

“So around a hundred left,”  You finish breathlessly, almost wanting him to speak faster and cut to the chase so you can calculate quicker.  “How many were dispatched on the search?”

“Uh, there were eight groups of five sent in each major direction,” he informs you, still trembling on the ground.  “Told us not to come back until we covered the entire sector.”

Of which, four you’ve already taken care of.  In other circumstances, you’d be nauseated at the thought, but right now, it’s just another number to subtract, just more panicked math in Din’s frightening absence.  That leaves at least sixty troopers left wherever the base is, minimum, and likely a couple more hours before they’ve combed the sector.  If this wasn’t a preconceived trap purposefully set for the kid, then that means reinforcements haven’t arrived yet but likely will soon.  And if this is a base meant for training and conditioning, then that also means there’s a chance not all of them will be loyal yet.

You make the decision immediately.

“Okay,” you announce, clicking the blaster’s safety switch and holstering it, sounding lightyears more certain than you feel.  “Then you’re going to help me carry out a rescue mission, and I’ll take you back to your sister.”

“You…”  He looks uncertain, blinking at your blaster and slowly lowering his hands.  “You want to rescue the men?”

Ideally?  Sure.  Realistically?  You don’t say anything in response.  Instead, you kick his regulation firearm at your feet further away from the quarry just in case your judgment is flawed, and then turn around and grab one of the bodies behind you.

Your adrenaline is still blaring so fast that you only just barely note the severity of what you’ve just done and what you’re continuing to do.  The corpses aren’t real to you right now, they’re inanimate things that you need out of your ship before you can close the doors to it.  They are, however, heavy as fuck, but the only other adult here has a wound in his arm from the gun on your hip.  Regardless, you have experience with lifting dead weight without a big, strong, capable man to do it for you.

“Help me out here, kid,” you mutter over your shoulder, and in response, you feel his claws dig in and climb up just a little bit until he can peek out in front of you.  Thankfully, the burden is suddenly lifted and you can quickly slide the dead troopers down the ramp with ease.  It takes hardly any time at all—you just yank and haul and release and all four of them tumble the rest of the way all by themselves.

When you stand back up, Oshua hasn’t moved and he’s looking at you with a pale, queasy expression.  Glancing down, you see that your white robe is now stained with streaks and patches of rusty blood.  Instead of swallowing back bile at the sight and bolting to the shower to scrub off every last remaining trace, you breeze past it, noting nothing more than a change of color.  Dirtying your white, pristine clothing with the consequences of protecting this baby—you’d rather have blood-soaked fabric with an unharmed kid clinging to you than any other combination of those things.

“Can you make it up to the cockpit?”  You ask the quarry, kicking his rifle off the ship before closing the ramp and then gesturing up the ladder.  Your voice is calm and steady but your hands are beginning to shake again.  “I need as much information as possible about the base.”  You know that’s where Din is, judging from the wall of blaster screeches that drowned him out through the comm.  Logically, you know you could be headed right into a trap, and every instinct inside you wants to find safety, but… you just cannot imagine flying the ship away from this planet without Din onboard.  It isn’t fucking happening, you’ve made your choice.

Without waiting for a response, you climb the ladder and plop down in the pilot’s seat of the Crest.  While Oshua finds some way to clamber up the steps behind you in bulky stormtrooper armor with one good arm, you hold the kid closer on your lap and begin flight checking.  Din will be fucking furious, but the scolding you’ll be sure to get is the least of your worries right now.  Following his instructions and going back to Nevarro is just making shit infinitely more dangerous for him, turning what could be a potential rescue mission into an undeniable suicide mission.  Even if Karga somehow decides to send a few guild members along to infiltrate the base, it’ll be a war you want to avoid.

Besides.  What did you always tell him about running away from him, even when he instructs you to?

It’s just… not really your thing.

---

They’re everywhere.

They crawl like flies out of the base, and for every single body that falls, three more spill from the open doors.  Rapid fire plasma beams launch from the end of Din’s blaster, melting white armor with every twitch of his gloved finger.  Their aim is terrible, as is to be expected, but the sheer number of them more than makes up for it, as is by design.

Din’s heart pounds with exertion, his breath comes in ragged huffs through the modulator as his helmet identifies and isolates which body is closest to him, which body he needs to bring down next.  His blaster is so hot it nearly burns his hand, even through the thick gloves he wears.  When he runs out of ammo, he holsters the pistol and swings his rifle from around his shoulder, spinning to catch a handful of troopers behind him in the obliterating blast.

He’s not thinking much.  He can’t think, even though your safety and that of his son is currently dangling by a thread.  If he focuses on that, he’ll be dead before he can even picture your faces.  He just reacts, he maims and kills without a single thought in his mind.  Blood splatters, screams and sirens blare as he becomes surrounded by more and more troopers.  Din can hear the sound of plasma colliding and ricocheting off his armor; every single one of them is a potential injury he could currently have but might not even be able to feel right now.

His helmet starts beeping rapidly and he turns just enough to see, highlighted in bright red on the screen, two enormous artillery turrets slowly rising up out of the roof of the imperial base.  He feels a fierce flash of anger burn in his chest, it’s like a lightning strike to his veins.

Din needs to go.

And yet… if he was another man.  If he wasn’t a father, or a husband, if he had no family and no attachments like the creed declared he should, he would go.  With just a twitch of his fingers, he could be launching into the sky and retreating as far away from this battlefield as he could reasonably get.  He’s never been the type to run from a threat, but this isn’t just a threat.  Dozens of troopers are gaining on him, they’re trampling their own dead to get within range.  Plasma pings off his shoulder, another one hits his back as they flank from behind.  He can feel the heat through the sizzling beskar, he can see them surrounding him on all sides, and the propulsion trigger for his jetpack is right there under his wrist.

Din holds his ground and continues firing, he plants his feet firmly to the dirt with only one thought in his mind.

Run, sweet girl.  Run.

---

You type in commands to scan for Din’s signal, quickly locating it through the Crest’s computer onboard.  Not far from here, three minutes or less.  The ship rumbles to life beneath you, slowly lifting off the rocky ground and rotating in place as it hovers.  It’s not on autopilot but you feel like you are, you can barely feel your hands as they move the yoke forward and the Crest takes off in the direction of Din’s blinking frequency.

“Tell me about defenses,” you instruct Oshua, restlessly bouncing your leg while the baby coos.

“Two plasma turrets on top of the base,” the quarry quickly answers.  “There’s usually guards stationed around the perimeter, but everyone who’s capable will be outside right now.”

Your mouth twists downwards under the mask.  Blasters don’t scare you much from this high up, but Din’s armor doesn’t cover every inch of his body, he’s not completely invincible.  Doubt churns in your stomach, but you have to stay focused on one task at a time so you don’t get overwhelmed.  The turrets, then.  “Are they automatic?”

“Manual,” he corrects with a shake of his head.

“Radar?”

“Old.  Only engages above fifty meters.”

You eye your altitude and dip the Crest considerably, beginning to weave through the rocky canyons and dodging crumbling cliffs while you travel.  “What about ships?”

“None,” Oshua says, “except for a passenger shuttle used for transport.  TIEs are flown in the Vesta sector, this base is remote and used for basic training only.”

“Anything else?”  You ask, stomach twisting with the knowledge that barely four questions is all you’ve got.  You’re planning to drop into an imperial base to save the man you love and you can’t think of a single other question?  

The quarry shrugs, and your heart slams, does somersaults in your chest at the mere notion that you could fucking die here.  Today, in two minutes or less, you could die here.  The child in your lap looking over the ship’s front panel with a quiet determination in his eyes could die here.  Din could already be dead—that signal broadcasts his location to this computer regardless of whether he’s still breathing or not.  He could already be gone and you’d be flying the baby right into a trap without knowing any differently.

Whelp, you think while taking a deep breath, some strangely calm existential acceptance beginning to flood your soul.  If he isn’t dead, he will be soon if you don’t make it to him on time.

You immediately lift your wrist and speak into the communicator.  “Mando?”  You have no idea if he can hear you, but you need to try anyway.  Your voice is still firm, there’s a strength to it you don’t feel in your chest, but it certainly sounds convincing.  “I’m coming to get you.  Less than a minute to your location, do everything you can to get outside.  If you can’t, I’ll just… uh.  Try to figure something else out.”

That’s it.  That’s it, improvise until you don’t have to.  Even if you’re lacking confidence, you can at least scrounge up some conviction.  Your arms gain feeling again while you veer the Crest through the stony terrain, the familiar reverberations under your feet begin to fill your body with a powerful sense of purpose.  Your breaths begin to come steady, every falling rock you see through the transparisteel feels like it drops in slow motion, allowing you to evade them easily.  It would normally be stupidly dangerous to fly this low with so many unexpected obstacles and hazards narrowly missing the ship, but considering what you’re flying into, a few boulders seems comical.

“Where’s your helmet?”  Oshua asks out of nowhere, and for a second, you don’t think you heard him correctly.

But then it strikes you all at once what he’s attempting to imply, and the sheer lunacy of the thought is enough to make you laugh while you clutch the controls.  “I’m not a Mandalorian.”

“You wear the armor of one,” he points out… rather fairly, you have to admit.  “You cover your face like one.  You have a blaster that fires Philithiorium, a rare and expensive gas native to Mandalore’s stratosphere, and you’re a bounty hunter—”

“I’m not a Mandalorian.”  Your words are short and cutting, you have a daunting task to focus on and don’t feel like having small talk right now.  “I’m not a bounty hunter, either.”

But then again, Karga made you a member of the Guild, didn’t he?  He handed you Oshua’s puck and said this one is for you to find, and you are technically part of a Mandalorian clan.  All of this seems like it happened without your knowledge.  You may be marrying a Mandalorian, you may wear his armor and mother his child and shoot a blaster with his signet branded into it, but war isn’t in your blood.  This robe was a costume when you first made it, this armor was a relic that was restored as a hobby.  In a sense, it still feels that way.  The mask covering your face lended itself to a temporary surge of bravery earlier, but beyond that, the only thing that’s keeping you moving forward now is your family.  The man you love that may or may not be alive right now, the baby holding tight to your leg while the ship sways and weaves through the stony landscape.

Your eyes quickly flick down to the child in your lap, both of his three fingered hands clutching onto the stained fabric of your knee without moving a single inch.  He’d know, you tell yourself.  If his father is gone, he’d already know somehow.  Din is still alive, and he’s counting on you.

---

There’s too many for Din to handle.

They swarmed him, overpowered his endless artillery with massive numbers and there’s nothing he can do anymore.  The backs of his knees are kicked from behind and he slams down to the ground with a clatter, his sizzling hot blasters are ripped from him, and Din folds his hands calmly behind his back even as one of the stormtroopers barks out, “Binders,” to another one, who disappears quickly in response.  In the meantime, a few of them apparently decide to just attempt holding his arms in place, and their measly combined grip is almost enough to make him roll his eyes under the helmet.  These imperial soldiers are even more pitiful than they usually are, but his silent resolve to stall to ensure your escape is enough to keep him stationary and compliant for the time being.

Eventually, a few voices call out from beyond the crowd and there’s some movement from the back.  Dozens of troopers with their blasters all pointed at him begin to shuffle to make way, careful to keep their barrels aimed at him while a path slowly forms.  The crowd of white parts and a stormtrooper with a singular red pauldron on his right shoulder saunters confidently towards Din as he kneels on the ground.

An officer, he assumes.  Conveniently missing from the firefight, the scanner inside his helmet would’ve caught the change in color and Din would’ve made sure to kill him first.

“Well now, what do we have here?”  Comes his thin metallic voice through the tinny filter.  The officer studies him curiously for a few moments, before slowly looking down by his feet, reaching out one cheap, plastic covered foot to gently nudge the body of a dead trooper on the ground with a sigh.  “What a shame.”

Coward, he thinks, his lip curling with disgust under the helmet.

“This is an imperial training base,” he turns his attention back to Din to inform him when he doesn’t immediately respond, rather stupidly he might add.  “How were you able to find us?”

Silence.  The grip on hands held behind his back is even looser now.  He just tilts his chin up slightly in defiance, the scanner inside his helmet locating each weapon strapped to the man’s body and highlighting it red.  Small text boxes blink into existence under each one with a manufacturer and classification—a BlasTech E-11 rifle, a Merr-Sonn thermal detonator, a Kolvo vibroblade—and Din is severely unimpressed with the quality.  The detonator is the only weapon that even catches his eye, and that’s only because the chamber inside that houses the explosive baradium has a release mechanism that’s completely dead.  Useless, then.  Good to know.

After a long moment of quiet tension where Din refuses to speak and the officer continues to confidently scrutinize him, in some strange sort of silent battle of egos that only one seems to have a genuine interest in, another stormtrooper makes his way to the front, shoving past his fellow soldiers to address the superior in charge.

“Commander, we’ve sent out an alert for an intruder,” he tells him, slightly out of breath from running through the crowd in the lightweight armor.  Din wants to roll his eyes, but what he says next makes him snap to immediate attention.  “The fleet informed us that Moff Gideon is currently on route.”

Gideon.  The last time someone spoke that name, it was a quarry on Coruscant and you just barely managed to stop Din from suffocating the bastard for even saying it aloud before freezing him in carbonite.  It would’ve meant half the return on a hunt that lasted nearly a month but he saw red and his hand was crushing his windpipe before he realized what happened.  But he’s dead, Din thinks with a clenched jaw and fists tightening behind his back, he watched that TIE fighter explode and slam into the ground, crushing the man inside it.  The wreck was unsurvivable, he can’t be alive.

“For what?  This Mandalorian?”  The trooper in charge scoffs in response, and Din remains completely mute.

“Yes, sir,” the other one confirms.  “Orders were to capture him, alive.”

“Hm.”  The officer turns his attention back to him, less analyzing and more musing while he tilts his head.  “I see,” he eventually says, and he sounds like he’s grinning, before strolling slightly closer as Din stays completely still on his knees.  “He must want the beskar.  I’m sure it’s worth more than this entire battalion combined.”

All of a sudden, a gloved hand carelessly catches the rim of his helmet and tugs, and Din’s movement is explosive.  He launches off the ground, arms easily slipping from the pathetic grip they were being held in and his fist colliding with the side of the officer’s flimsy white helmet, the plastic making a deafening crack against his face.

Multiple hands immediately rush forward to grab him and yank him back down again while the commanding trooper stumbles backwards in shock, and Din amicably drops to his knees and folds his hands behind his back once more like nothing happened at all.

“Binders!”  A trooper behind him roars loudly once more, and a few men surrounding him begin trotting away this time.

The officer in red stands a few feet away from him now, grabbing his helmet and twisting it back to its proper position on his head where it was skewed.  There’s a shattered hole near his jaw where the material splintered and busted like the cheap piece of banthashit it is, and while he might normally feel pleased with himself for being able to see his skin peeking through, it just fills him with more righteous fury.  It’s such a punchable jaw.

After a few awkward moments of silence, the other one clears his throat and continues.  “He… has inquired about the location and status of a child that should be accompanying him.”

Din inhales deeply through his nose and grinds his teeth.  He wants to snap their necks one by one for even just mentioning his son, but there are just too many, more than even his whistling birds can neutralize.  Still, he gave you as much of a head start as physically possible.  You should be rising into the atmosphere right now, making the jump into hyperspace towards safety.  Karga will know what to do—he’ll protect his family, separate you and the boy so the threat is evenly dispersed instead of collected all in one place, and arm dozens of trained hunters to keep watch over you both individually.  It’s the best Din can do, and it’s the only thing keeping his knees planted on the ground and his body completely motionless while they continue speaking.

“We are combing the sector for a ship with as many men as we can afford to lose,” the trooper in red says, but his voice filter is shattered and now sounds like a puny little droid with a broken voice box, “but our numbers are unimpressive.  Assistance may be required.”

It’s too late, Din thinks, mouth twitching under the beskar with a satisfied smirk.  They’re wasting their time, looking for a ghost.  You’re both long gone by now.  They’ve got no idea you even exist—

“He also spoke of a girl.”

And then he feels his heart stop in his chest.  Every single cell in his body turns to fire, it’s a fucking miracle he doesn’t move a muscle in response.  His sweet girl, the one so far removed from the nightmare of the Empire that she made best friends with the orphans of it.  How the fuck did he know?  He shouldn’t even be breathing, let alone gathering information about you, how did he know?

But then Din thinks back, remembering your makeshift bed on the floor, your panicked eyes and heaving chest as the quarry taunted him with a sick little smile.  Who’s this, Mando?  She’s just darling, isn’t she?  Does Gideon know your crew has a lovely new addition?

“A girl?”

The trooper nods.  “Moff Gideon insisted that if the Mandalorian did not have a child with him, then a girl would likely be protecting him instead.”

He’s going to kill them, Din decides.  Every single one of these imperial pigs, every single soldier standing right now is a dead fucking man.  The blood pumping through his body suddenly turns to acid, deadly black hate poisoning his soul.  His heartbeat morphs into a war drum, the armor strapped to his limbs is the barrel of a gun.  He’s going to fucking kill them and leave an imperial base full of bodies to greet his old nemesis upon his return, and he’s going to enjoy every single second of it.

Except, then—

“Mando?”  The sweetest voice in existence suddenly crackles through the earpiece under his helmet.  “I’m coming to get you.  Less than a minute to your location, do everything you can to get outside.  If you can’t, I’ll just… uh.  Figure something else out.”

And, as Din kneels there in surrender, surrounded by a crowd of enemies he thought he destroyed long ago, all the anger—all the fury and defiance and murder surging through his veins—suddenly morphs to fear.

The emotion is so foreign and old to him, it feels like a face he barely recognizes and a name he can’t remember.  He’s panicked before.  He’s been in situations where a threat has made him blind with rage, he knows what it’s like to look death straight in the eyes and say that he’s busy and to come back another time.  This is different.  This is ice cold that freezes over beskar.

He can’t speak out loud to warn you—he can’t move his hands to press the button on the back of his helmet and allow him to talk without detection.  There’s plasma turrets on the roof of the base, he can see them right now.  The helmet’s scanners say they’re manned and engaged, and though he is outside and this is how you retrieved him before whenever he needed a quick escape, he has fifty fucking imperial blasters trained on him and you know absolutely nothing about this threat.  You’re flying right into a war zone and if either you or his son dies, he won’t ever be able to forgive himself.

Behind the helmet, his eyes fly to each and every trooper, wondering which blaster will be the one to do it.  Which weapon is going to be the one he can’t block in time when you descend, the one that’ll kill him right in front of you.  Which turret will be the one to obliterate the Crest with you and his son inside of it.

“Maker, where are those fucking binders—” he hears someone behind him snarl, but the white noise of pure terror roaring through his ears drowns them out.  His chest starts heaving against his will, sheer panic begins to blur his vision.  For the first time in his life, his armor feels too heavy, his lungs feel like one of these boulders are sitting on them instead of beskar.

All too soon, his helmet starts making a familiar sound that signals quietly in his ear, alerting him of an incoming ship, and the only thing he can physically do is count down the seconds to prepare himself for what is to come.

Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two…

Like lightning, Din breaks the grip of multiple troopers and surges up, tackling the officer in red to the ground.  There’s a clatter as they both slam into the rocky floor, but in the ensuing scuffle, he easily snatches the thermal detonator from his side holster and holds it up for everyone to see, before pressing the red button on the front and hearing it begin to beep rapidly.

---

You’re right on time.

The Crest rises up through the rocky cliffs surrounding the base and you spot the turrets you were warned about.  Weapons controls are already engaged and you’re too low to be detected by radar—you fire once, twice, and blast both of them to smithereens from behind before they can even rotate around to target you.

Alarms start wailing but the guns are destroyed.  It’s not comforting, though; blasters won’t touch you up here, but that doesn’t mean they can’t fire at Din on the ground.  Your eyes dart across the sea of white, looking for a flash of silver anywhere, and then you spot him instantly in the chaos.

For some reason, the troopers in his vicinity all seem to be bolting away from him.  Their rifles are down, clutched in their hands while they nearly fall over each other to run away as fast as possible, and your heart soars when you spot his jetpack firing up.  Din launches into the sky while another trooper is revealed underneath him, seeming to juggle something in his hands and then throw it into the crowd of retreating soldiers, but the sight of the man you love rising into the air while a flurry of blaster shots from the far edges of the imperial structure follow him gives you the confidence to immediately turn the guns down towards the horde of troopers.

“Which ones are in charge?”  You ask Oshua breathlessly, who leans forward and points out the transparisteel.

“Red pauldrons—” he barely has time to say it before you aim and fire at one of the troopers wearing red that was closest to Din, the plasma beam launching from the Crest so powerful and devastating that it outright obliterates the surface he’s laying on.  Pieces of shattered armor fly and a smoking crater of rubble is all that’s left behind, but your mind is whirling and you’re already onto someone else wearing red at the edges of the complex, and then two more near the doors, and then another—

To their credit, you think the sixty or so soldiers in training seem to figure out that you’re not aiming into the enormous collection of them.  If you were, the damage would be catastrophic and spraying everywhere, but you’re precise and meticulous with your shots, and the only ones who are loyal enough to the cause to hold still and raise their blasters at the incoming threat tend to be the ones you need to mow down anyways.  The rest of them scatter in all directions, scrambling over each other to escape and then disappearing into the distant boulders surrounding the base—but you notice that not a single one of them runs back inside the safety of its open doors.

The hull dips with the weight of Din dropping in, and relief floods your soul even as you continue raining hell down on the superiors in charge.  Any flash of color you see is a target, your eyes lose focus of everything, your vision blurs and turns monochrome as you just search for red.

“Lift up!”  You hear Din’s voice roar from the hull.  You can hear his rifle unloading through the open door.  “Now!  We have to go now!”

You press the button to shut the hull door with Din inside and punch it, rising so fast that the shove of gravity makes it difficult to keep your head up.  Through the sudden surge of downward force, you just barely manage to raise your incredibly heavy arm to push the button that pressurizes the Crest and ignites the launch boosters, preparing the vessel for space travel.  Outside the transparisteel, the gray sky begins darkening as the atmosphere eventually disappears.  The ship’s engines roar, burning so much fuel at once that you’re actually accelerating through the climb, you’re boosting through the gradual ease of gravity as the planet’s curvature and glow becomes softer and softer below you.

As soon as the blackness of space begins to fill the windows, the slight subsiding of force allows you to plug in the coordinates for Nevarro with less difficulty, but you’re still moving, still rising, still escaping.  You can’t find it within yourself to slow down, but then something catches your attention.

Claws suddenly dig sharp into your thigh, sharp enough to sting and cause you to wince, and you look down to see that the kid has gone incredibly tense.  Deadly tense.  Your heart is still pounding even though you’re away from danger, you’ve got Din in the hull, everyone is safe, and yet—

It flickers into existence all at once.  One second it’s just space, just the endless depths of nothingness spread out for light years in front of you, and within the blink of an eye it’s suddenly there.

A star destroyer.

Your body freezes in horrified awe, having never seen a ship so fucking big in your entire life.  It looks like a massive satellite, the size of an enormous asteroid instantly appearing in your vision and dwarfing the vastness of space around it.  All the stars you used to dream about are suddenly blotted out within a fraction of a second, terror so immense seizes your soul that you stop thinking.  You stop calculating, you stop being yourself for a split second that lasts an entire lifetime.

Before you can move a single muscle, the computer beeps quickly and lurches the Crest into hyperspace.

---

The stars streak across the transparisteel like so many times before.  Utter silence nearly deafens you with how abrupt it is after so much noise, but the peace it used to bring does nothing to quell your fear.  Everything is the same as it always was, same bursts of light as you hurdle faster than it towards Nevarro, same quiet, same rumbling hum of the ship.  But now, everything has changed.

You hear the quarry next to you suddenly inhale and exhale loudly, and it shocks you a little bit, reminds you that there’s a person next to you and another is on your lap.  Other people exist outside of the vision of death that just flickered out of existence just as quickly as it appeared.  They’re breathing, Oshua is shakily unbuckling his seatbelt, life is continuing on in the quiet cockpit but you can’t seem to move like he is.  You can’t seem to breathe like he is.  It’s only when the baby slowly maneuvers himself around on your thigh and blinks up at you, placing a tiny hand on your stomach that you finally feel air enter your lungs.

After a moment, you reach down and click open your seatbelt with trembling fingers, scooping the kid up in your arms and slowly attempting to stand.  Everything feels wobbly and dreamlike, you have to brace yourself on the headrest to prevent yourself from falling back into the chair again.

“That was…” Ryler mutters, his voice sounding foggy and distant, “uh.  A close one.”

You look over at him, recognizing that he’s speaking but not quite able to understand the words right now.  Red catches in your vision, and you blink down at the way he’s clutching his left shoulder, the smear of blood darkening the white armor he’s wearing.  You blink a few more times at the sight of it, and though it feels like you normally would be sickened at the wound, somehow shocked out of your state of shock, it does nothing to you.  When you look back up at his face, his expression seems strangely grateful, even when it’s screwed up in what you know must be excruciating pain.    You did that, a quiet voice whispers in your mind, even though the rest of it seems incredibly blank.

Instead of responding, you stumble a few steps over to the ladder, spinning around and hesitating for a moment.  You’re severely lacking in coherent thought, but one thing seems to break through.  You’re not sure if you have enough coordination to do this safely right now.  However, when there’s movement in your peripheral and you look to see Oshua gently offering his right arm to you, seeming to understand you’d like to use both hands for this, you snap back to your senses just the slightest bit and hug the baby tighter to your chest.  Carefully, you begin making the slow climb down the ladder with the kid, still trembling with the aftershocks of adrenaline.  Your limbs feel extra heavy, but eventually the floor meets your feet.

Din is standing there when you slowly turn around, armor gleaming and still as a statue, but he has his back to you.  His helmet is tilted down at the ground, and when you follow his gaze, you’re met with the sight of the bloodstains of dragged bodies that leave dark red streaks all the way up the ramp.

You feel something this time.  It’s… cold.  A burning, searing cold that creeps into your skin.  Like your heart decides to pump nitrogen through your chest instead of warm blood.  You did that.

There’s a sudden urge inside of you to speak, to address him and inform him of your presence, tell him everything is okay, everything worked out, but you can’t find it in yourself to say a single word.  You can’t find a single word to say.  The kid twists as best he can in your clutch, his ears drag against your chest to greet his father, but for some reason, there’s still a strange sense of fear in your bones.  It’s enough to wake you up slightly, it’s enough to tell you it’s not over yet.  There’s a terror in your heart that hasn’t left since he first called over the comm and begged you to run, a crippling dread that you thought climaxed after seeing that star destroyer appear, but it’s somehow only increased after laying eyes on him like this.

You watch as his helmet turns, slowly meeting the pauldron on his shoulder, and for some reason, you feel yourself harden.  Your feet brace against the metal floor like this is another threat you have to face, you let its unyielding metallic strength transfer up through the souls of your boots to your heart in your chest.

But the second you hear cheap white armor clatter as the quarry steps down the ladder behind you, Din bursts into movement.  He suddenly spins and storms up to you in one single step while catching your holstered blaster on your hip.  It’s out and aimed in the blink of an eye, and it’s a miracle you remember how to speak before he remembers how to kill.

“Mando—” you warn, just in time for the quarry to land on the floor of the hull and turn around to reveal his face.

Din holds there for a second, his helmet locked on Oshua’s features.  His gloved fingers twitch wildly on the trigger of your gun held over your shoulder, like he has to remind himself multiple times not to.  You hear Oshua’s armor clack while he likely raises one good arm in surrender, but then Din’s helmet moves a fraction of a millimeter to your face and holds there.  He just stares down at you, and the air feels heavy, your body feels heavy, the feather light child in your arms feels heavy.

Slowly, he lowers his arm, lets it fall while he continues looking at you from behind the visor.  You look back at him, unblinking, unfeeling, and there’s a few seconds that last an utter eternity where nobody moves.  Nobody speaks, nothing happens, but then a soft coo comes from your arms before you can finally break eye contact, knowing there are still some things that need to be done.

You eventually turn around and lift your chin to address Oshua.

“You have to go into carbonite,” you inform him quietly.  Your voice sounds strange, like it’s coming from outside of yourself.  “We’re taking you to Nevarro, and then you’ll be transported to your home planet. When they unfreeze you, your sister will be there to collect you.”

He looks uncertain, one hand still raised while the other hangs uselessly at his side, and you don’t blame him.

But you also don’t feel like saying anymore, not unless he decides he doesn’t want to go in willingly.  Normally you might’ve tried to empathize, offer him further reassurance beyond just a couple short sentences, but you don’t.  Speaking feels difficult, thinking feels difficult.  You’re still in survival mode, not active but reactive.  There’s also no reason for you to lie to him about this, and you can see him glance at Din standing silently behind you, who hasn’t moved a muscle.

He eventually nods and you walk him over to the chamber without another word, watch him turn to face you as he backs into the opening while you reach up towards the control panel.

But then there’s a moment.  One where you hesitate slightly, one where your vision flashes back to the sight of those bloodstains on the floor, and that burning cold fills you again, so cold it feels completely numb.

“I’m… sorry,” you whisper quietly to him, though your voice sounds so empty.  There’s so much emotion that should be there but isn’t, so much regret and pain that should break through but can’t.  “I’m sorry I… killed your friends.”

Later, you’ll think about how you felt absolutely nothing saying it.  Your heart doesn’t constrict with remorse at the mere words leaving your mouth, guilt doesn’t flood into your soul, pain doesn’t wrack through your bones.  You could’ve been saying anything at all and nobody would be able to tell the difference.

He blinks at you, flicking his eyes between yours for a second or two, but then you press the proper button and watch the gas quickly freeze him where he stands.  He’ll be conscious the entire time, but Karga will send him to the correct location and you have no doubt that this elemental purgatory is leagues better than where he just escaped from.  It’s a benefit being the last quarry to be retrieved—he’ll only have to spend a few days trapped in here before being reunited with his family.

When that’s done and Oshua is a complete statue in front of you, bulky white armor now colored a dull metallic gray and frozen in time, you will yourself to finally turn around to face the enormous mountain of a presence behind you.  The baby gently reaches out for him, but Din doesn’t move from where he’s stood.  Your blaster is still clutched tightly in his hand, and he isn’t looking at you.

Slowly, you walk over and stop directly in front of him in the middle of the hull, blinking at him while the helmet subtly moves to lock onto your face.  The kid begins wiggling in your arms, making soft impatient noises while you both stand in complete silence across from each other.

After a few moments, you hear him flick your blaster’s safety on by his side and then toss it carelessly to the ground.  It skids along the floor, light enough to be mostly quiet.  Gloves reach out as he carefully takes the kid from you and settles him in the crook of one arm, and then he looks you up and down, still not saying anything.

Your eyes follow his movement, watching his arm slowly reaching out to you, and you think he’s going to cup your jaw, or brush your hair back.  Give you some sort of physical reassurance since he hasn’t spoken a single word of it.

Instead, Din suddenly grabs the armor clinging to your chest and starts ripping it off you with one hand.  It clangs to the floor so loudly in the silence of hyperspace, the kid’s ears twitch and flutter with each shattering bang.  You hold still while he does it, you barely respond except the unavoidable movement your body experiences as the pauldron is yanked from your shoulder and thrown against the ground.  The ammo belt is tugged over your head and hurled away, the thigh braces are snatched from your legs and they clang to the floor, and the pearly, opalescent fabric revealed underneath is stained in dead man’s blood, rusty and in such great quantities that it shows up as brown instead of red.

“Are you hurt?”

He sounds… dead.  So monotonic that you can’t possibly gauge his emotional state.  He doesn’t move.   His fists don’t clench, he says every single word like it means the same exact thing as the last.  If nothing at all was a person who could speak, they’d use his tone of voice.

“No,” you eventually whisper.

The helmet nods once, and then he spins around and walks away without anything else.  Without saying anything, without touching you, or double checking you for injuries in case you were lying.  You stand utterly still while Din climbs the ladder with the kid cradled in one arm, and you don’t even flinch when the door to the cockpit slides shut behind him.  You have no idea how long you stand there in the splitting silence afterwards, numb and unmoving.

You feel… nothing.  Absolutely nothing.

The hard defenses you strapped to yourself today to reconcile the things you had to do are still high and strong, guarding your soul even if he stripped away your physical armor.  Self preservation is still animating your body, and your facial expression barely changes.  Your first thought, as soon as you remember that you can have one, is that there are things that still need to be done.  Tasks to complete.

Alone, you shower the lingering traces of blood off your body, the normally clear and refreshing water running a sickly, toxic brown.  Alone, your stomach rolls and suddenly decides to empty itself of the very little that was in it as the scalding drops rain down over you—mostly liquid and bile that easily rinses down the drain.  The water is too warm, it beats down on you like blazing hot sand pelting your skin in the desert.  You feel like you did those first few months with Din, where the silence was suffocating, where you’d only interact with the baby if he was on a hunt or if you could tell he didn’t know how to calm him when he was fussy.  If you were in hyperspace, you usually spent time by yourself in the hull while he lived in the cockpit, and if he decided he needed to be in the hull for whatever reason, then you’d trade places with him.  It was… isolating.  Lonely by yourself.  The quiet used to haunt you before it became your cherished friend, but now it’s a betrayer, a ghost that whispers memories and nightmares in your ears.

When you finally finish rinsing the blood from your skin and get dressed, you see the sheets that used to make up your bed now have fried holes in them from your charred plasma marks, the inside of the hull is covered in them and the trails of dried blood where you dragged the bodies down the ramp.  Your armor is still strewn about the hull, the kid’s hovering shield lays dead in the corner.  Everything you meticulously cleaned and organized and collected and created, now the scene of a bloodbath.  One committed by your hand, your blaster still laying uselessly on the floor forever linked to this atrocity.

You spare a glance towards the ladder, but you don’t want to come face to face with Din yet.  You already knew he’d be furious, but… you had hoped that he’d at least…

What?  At least what?  Comfort you?  Coddle you after you deliberately ignored his instructions?  What exactly, in the past year or so of learning Din’s inner workings and intricacies, would ever give you the impression that he’d come give you a big hug after you purposefully defied him?  You flew the kid directly into an imperial base after being told to protect him, you ignored every order he gave to you in the moments he thought would be his last, and though you did it to save his life, you have a feeling that Din has never valued his life even a fraction of what you do.

The misery stabs at your soul, but your mind is finally beginning to process things logically.  He’s alive, the kid is alive, the quarry is secure, and you’re all onboard the safety of this ship hurtling through hyperspace where nobody, not even the Empire, can touch you.  You weighed the consequences before making your decision, you did what you had to do.  If he wants to be mad, then he can fucking well be mad and you’ll find some way to comfort yourself.  At least he’s here being mad, at least he’s alive and safe and breathing and mad, and your rare act of disobedience is to thank for that.

Somewhere in the back of your mind, you realize it’s probably easier than it should be to reconcile the punishment.  Right now, you welcome the exclusion, the negativity and sorrow beating itself into your soul.  Four innocent people died today on this ship, gunned down under your blaster while they panicked and ran for cover.  You keep hearing their screams.

So you start to clean up the hull, needing another task to focus your thoughts on.  You work to erase every inch of the evidence of your deeds, make it disappear like the pool of blood Din once cleaned up while you were sleeping and never acknowledged again.  You only allow the bloodstains to fuck with your head for a single moment, and then you swallow back the nausea until you’re a blank slate again and sink to your knees with a rag in your hand.  After that, your vision stops focusing and it just becomes red contrasting against gunmetal gray, and you work tirelessly to get rid of all remaining traces of it.

Then you start on the blaster marks, you need them gone.  After a few informed attempts at mixing cleaning chemicals, you find one concoction that allows you to wipe them away like they’re nothing more than dirt that got tracked in.  The Crest’s oxygen recycling system works overdrive to constantly purify the air so you don’t get high or pass out, but your nose still stings.  It’s fine, it’s sterile, it burns a bit but it smells sharp and metallic and keeps you hyper focused on the task at hand.

After that’s done, you pick up the charred blankets and ball them up to throw into the trash vent.  You don’t feel anything as you do it.  You don’t think about how long it took you to collect these over months and months of being stuck on this ship, how comfortable they were when everything else was industrial and rigid, how many nights you spent with Din curled up in their softness while he breathed easy and warm.  Sheets are just luxuries, they can afford to be lost.

Next, you gather your armor and wipe it down with the rag, put it away along with your blaster.  The stained robe goes in the trash, along with the sheets and the blood soaked cloth you used to clean everything.  They’re all ruined, you’ll never be able to make them right again.

The hull is sparkling clean when you decide to take another shower.  Nothing on you is dirty except your hands, but you feel filthy.  Wrong, cold, numb, cold, stained, cold.

After scrubbing your skin raw under the water and changing clothes again, since you don’t really know what to do with yourself anymore, you slowly climb the ladder to the cockpit, keeping perfectly silent.  When you reach the upper platform and come face to face with the closed door, you can just barely hear Din’s whispered voice speaking quietly to the baby beyond it.

You raise your hand for a moment, hovering your knuckles over the metal, but then it eventually falls.  Instead, you look over and spot the corner, the same corner Din bunched himself into when he snapped at you for even suggesting going on a hunt with him, blew up at you for the mere notion of something happening like what happened today.  You back yourself into it in defeat and slowly sink down on the floor, resting your head against the metal and hugging your knees to your chest since you don’t have a tiny baby to take their place.

You can’t sleep.  You don’t even try, it’s pointless.  The concept feels foreign the longer you sit here by yourself.  You don’t hear Din or the baby anymore, but you feel… so fucking awful that it’s fitting that you don’t knock or go looking.  You don’t want to hold that sweet child with hands that were covered in blood just a few hours ago.  You killed more people than you can count on your fingers today, and of the ones who had done nothing wrong…  They screamed like younglings, ducked for cover and were able to fire off one single useless shot in the mayhem before you closed their eyes forever and left their bodies to rot in armor that wasn’t ever their choice to wear.

You didn’t know they were kidnapped and smuggled and forced into that situation.  You couldn’t have known, but that isn’t the point.  In this case, knowing doesn’t make one bit of difference.

You also can’t face Din yet, not like this.  You don’t want him to see you cowering, shattered with guilt over the decisions you made under pressure.  How will you ever get him to forgive you for not listening to him when you can’t even forgive yourself for the result of your choices?  Din is a hardened man who grew up in blasterfire and bloodshed, just because you love him doesn’t mean he’s going to magically become someone he isn’t.  You’re here letting guilt sink sharp claws into your chest over four dead men when he had a good fifty or more corpses scattered on the battlefield around him.  You decided to wear that armor, you decided to fly into an imperial base with the kid on your lap, and this is now your penance.  You’ll accept it with your back straight and your chin held high.

Figuratively, of course.  Physically, you’re smaller than you’ve ever been.  Crumpled up into a ball, taking up as little space as possible, curling up as tight as you can like an animal protecting all your vulnerable parts during a brutal attack.

So, since he isn’t here to comfort you himself, you just try to think about what he would tell you.  A long time ago, what would he tell you?

Din would tell you… that you killed someone.  Multiple people, this time.  He’d also tell you that it doesn’t matter what he tells you, what you could have reasonably foreseen or what you should have done.  The end result won’t change.  You own this now.  You’ll carry their deaths with you.

You take a few deep breaths, self-soothing with the undeniable truth that would be murmured matter of factly from his quiet voice.  He wouldn’t argue with you.  He wouldn’t deny the decisions you made or the consequences of them.  It happened, and at the end of the day, you either learn how to handle that, or you don’t.

And, for the four you did shoot, you were responsible for freeing ten times that amount.  You’re responsible for reuniting Oshua Ryler with his family, even if your place in yours is momentarily shunned.  You’d rather be out here alone than in there with the kid, wondering where his dad is or if he’s even still alive.  You rescued Din and now he gets to be here to shut this door on you, hold his son, and whisper calm reassurances to him.  If you listen really hard and imagine, you can pretend they’re for you, too.

That’s it.  Focus on them both, alive and well together.  Focus on the bodies wearing white armor that were moving, the ones that were bolting away from the imperial training base as fast as they could, free from the torture of imprisonment and conditioning.

Finally, you close your eyes and slip into unconsciousness.  It’s not a testament to your exhaustion, but rather just how long you’ve been left to sit here by yourself.  Hours, maybe.  Time is strange in hyperspace.

You dream of a faceless man ringing bells.

---

When you wake up, a small baby has been placed in your arms, and you’re being dragged into a strong, secure beskar hold on the floor.

“Din,” you suddenly lift your head as soon as you’re conscious and nearly bonk it into solid metal, apologies rising in your throat before you even remember where you are.  You did what needed to be done to keep your family alive and together and you’d do it a thousand times again if necessary, but that doesn’t mean you won’t apologize anyways.  After the deeds you’ve committed today, regret feels as natural on your lips as speaking your own name.  “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, I know you’re mad at me but I—”

“Shh,” he whispers, running his gloves through your hair.  He’s still wearing his helmet, he hasn’t taken anything off yet.  “Don’t say anything.  Just… stay here, stay right here with me.”

“I tried to save you,” you croak, tears instantly flooding your eyes.  You did save him.  You saved him and the baby and yourself but you’re so physically and emotionally exhausted that all you can recall is your intent.  “I tried.  Wasn’t gonna leave you there by yourself.  I tried to be brave, like you—y-you wouldn’t have left without me.”

His arms tighten around you, cradling you in such a strong embrace that you burrow into him, you find a place for your head on the hard metal strapped to him and bury yourself there, wishing that you had shovels of dirt being piled on you to justify the death you still feel staining your soul.  Your heart is starting to pound now that you’re remembering, your body is starting to shake with tremors of shock now that you’re aware of your own skin again.

“I was so sc-scared, Din, I didn’t—didn’t know what was happening,” you lament through watery eyes, gasping it out in hopes that it’ll relieve the slightest bit of the gut wrenching guilt just mercilessly crushing you.  It caught you before you could protect yourself against it, that armor you built around yourself isn’t on when you first wake up.  “I-I didn’t want to kill them, but they were already on the ship and y-you said—you said they were coming after the kid s-so I had to, I had to—”

“Stop,” Din whispers, voice so quiet that you can barely hear him.

“I-I cleaned up the blood,” you turn your face against the cold beskar to let all the positives you listed for yourself before scrape across your throat.  They don’t sound comforting anymore, they just sound like excuses.  “It’s gone, it’s like it never happened, everything is okay now, I got the quarry, I protected the baby, I saved a bunch of people, you’re both safe—”

“Stop,” he chokes out.  The modulator cuts off before you can hear his next breath, but you feel it shudder under your body.  “St-Stop it, please.”

Your eyes clench shut so tightly you feel like the streaking stars outside are behind them, tears drop down against his pauldron and you press your face tighter to it like it’s a wound, like the pressure will somehow ease the bleeding.

“Listen to me,” he says very quietly, and you instantly brace yourself.  The walls you just let down shoot right back up, your body physically tightens in preparation for another pain, another trauma, another scar you’ll carry, and you stop shaking.  You stop breathing, even when his hand comes up to ease your face away from his armor.

“You,” he whispers, holding your chin so you’re staring right at him, and your eyes flick fearfully in between his behind the visor, “are a sweet girl.”  Din’s leather thumb brushes along your skin, dragging over the tears below your puffy eyes.  “Not,” his voice catches, “a Mandalorian.”

Your heart goes cold.  Again, everything turns numb.  It doesn’t matter that you already said this yourself out loud earlier today.  It doesn’t matter that you acknowledged this fact, verbally insisted it more than once to hammer home the truth and felt some sense of comfort in it.  For some reason, hearing the words from his mouth is a fucking knife to your chest.

“I taught you how to fight, how to shoot a blaster,” he murmurs, thumb catching every single tear that continues to fall as he speaks.  “I taught you everything I know, everything that’s been taught to me.  I taught you how to defend yourself, how to protect yourself when you’re in danger.  I gave you your blaster, I gave you my armor, I gave you everything I could give you to keep you safe.  And when I thought you were ready, I let you loose on Sanctuary II.  Do you know why I did that?”  The helmet tips forward the slightest bit at the question, probing deep into the most shattered part of your heart.  “After all those months of fighting, and shooting, and training, do you know why I told you to run?”

You blink silently at him, a shaky breath quaking through you, and your expression wants to crumple under the reprimand.  You’re so fragile right now, taking hit after hit after hit to the softest parts inside you, and you want to just give up.  Let the guilt and remorse take you, let it wash you away.  But then, instead…

There’s a flicker of something inside you.  Something strong, endlessly strong, and it makes you want to revolt against what he’s saying.  It replaces the hurt and fear and desperation for comfort with a strange sense of insurgence, like it did earlier when you were hiding behind a boulder, cowering and trembling and not wanting to die.  You’re filled with a quiet urge to defend yourself in the face of this, stand up for yourself and refuse to be beaten down any longer.

“Because you needed to know how to escape danger,” he answers himself when you don’t.  “You needed to know how to disappear, how to outsmart any pursuer and find safety, even the trained ones.  Especially the trained ones.  Anything else was meant to be your last resort.  Not your choice.  Not something you chose.”

“I couldn’t leave you,” you admit to him quietly, voice shaky and tears still coming even as you try to speak up for yourself.  The regret you carry has nothing to do with this, and you decide right now that you won’t feel bad for saving him.  Your hurt comes from the meaningless things, the ones without any need whatsoever, not the necessary ones, and you tried.  You repeated his words to yourself over and over again, told yourself to run, told yourself to get to Nevarro, and it wasn’t going to happen.  “I couldn’t do it.  It wasn’t a choice.”

“It was,” he tells you.  He says it softly, whispers it like it’s the gentlest thing in the world, but the power and inherent distance of the armor strapped to his body finds its way into the words.  “And it was the wrong one.”

“What was I supposed to do?”  You ask, just a hint of that rebellion swimming to the surface now, rising out of the waves of self doubt, the one that feels like a spine growing in your back, an energy coursing through your veins that makes your heart start to beat faster.  Din’s hand slowly drops from your cheek but you don’t care.  “Was I supposed to run away and just let you die?”

“Yes.”  It’s quick and blunt and completely emotionless.  Delivered like a punch to the vulnerable parts of yourself he taught you how to protect, and the utter silence following this single word is comparable to the physical pain you learned to defend against.  It jabs hard against everything good and sweet and tender inside of you, and you’re left speechless even as he continues impassively.  “That’s exactly what you were supposed to do.”

It takes a second, but then that unfamiliar feeling suddenly surges up, breaches with the power of an entire ocean.  Your voices may be nothing more than whispers in the dark, you may be clinging to each other, holding each other with the softest, gentlest love in your hearts, but the strength of your conviction on this would rip metal apart.

“No.”  The word holds the might of your entire being, and it stands alone and defiant in the face of everything you fear, everything that threatens you, him, and this child.  Never.  You’ll die before that happens.  “I love you, and there’s nothing in this galaxy that would ever make me do that.  Not fear, not danger, not the Empire, nothing.  Not even you.”

Din stares at you.  His visor reflects your hardened expression back to you, the force in your soul and the purpose in your eyes, and you don’t even realize the gravity of what you just said because like your love for him, gravity is a constant.  It’s a fundamental truth cemented into the rules that govern your actions and it stays true no matter where you are, no matter what terror you face, or how scared you become.  You have him, you have this little boy in your arms, and if that’s all you have, then you have everything.

After an eternity of this, of feeling his eyes pierce deep into you from behind the helmet while you refuse to wither under his stare, you watch him slowly turn and look down, landing on the sleepy child tucked between you both.  He holds there for a long time, before finally whispering, so quiet that the modulator barely picks it up, “It was the wrong choice.”

You stay quiet.  It happened.  What’s done is done, you can’t change the past.  He can scold and reprimand you about this as much as he wants, but you did the right thing and that decision is the only reason he’s even here to be able to do so.  This exhausted child was reunited with his father because of your choices, and this exhausted father was reunited with his child.  You won’t argue anymore, but it’s a certitude that lives deep in your heart now, builds a home there right alongside the both of them.  Din eventually looks up, his eyes find yours again behind the visor, and his hand rises once more to gently cup your jaw.

“I… thought I’d enjoy seeing you in my armor,” Din finally whispers.  It’s not what you expected, but his voice sounds… weak.  Broken.  “You wore mine once before, and it was…”  He brushes his thumb along your cheek, and then his head shakes slightly, pushing the thought away.  “It wasn’t real.  It didn’t fit.  It dwarfed you, it made you look out of place, it made everything soft and innocent about you stand out.  I liked it because it wasn’t real.”

“Was it… really that bad?”  You whisper back, partially to ease the tension just slightly but quickly breaking eye contact with him when you realize it doesn’t land correctly, it just sounds self conscious and sad.  You try to find that conviction again, that strength and assurance that propped you up so sturdily before, but…  Not a Mandalorian, he’d said.  Of course not.  Of course not.

“It wasn’t the armor.”  Din gently tugs up on your face so that you look at him again.  “It was you covered in blood.  It was you purposefully putting yourself in danger.  You killed multiple armed soldiers of the Empire, you dragged their bodies off the ship.  And then you flew into an imperial base, where you killed the officers, too.  You…”  He shakes his head slowly at you while speaking, and although you can’t see his face, you don’t need to in order to hear the horror in his voice.   “You… collected a quarry… in the middle of a massacre, sweet girl.”

Not a Mandalorian.

“You don’t chase down bounties,” he tells you.  “You don’t fly into war zones.  You don’t kill imperials, you don’t collect quarries, you don’t sacrifice yourself, or our son, to save me.  You said you tried to be brave… like me.”  His fingers tighten against your cheek, he dips his helmet to make sure you understand.  “I’ll never ask you to be brave.  I’ll ask you to survive.”

“I’m… sorry,” you finally whisper, and his arm drops from your cheek to join the other in wrapping around you and holding tight.  They hug you and squeeze, encasing you and the baby in a beskar shield and staying there for a long time.  Long enough for you to tuck your head back into its proper place under his helmet, long enough to start to feel okay with the silence again.  It brutalized you the last time you were surrounded by it, it made you feel alone and desolate and barren inside.  You greet it warily now, settling into it for an unknown amount of time until it’s forgiven once more.

After a while, Din quietly breaks it.

“How many?”  He murmurs to you.  You already know exactly what he’s asking, there's no more clarification necessary on his behalf.

You slowly close your eyes and think back to the smoldering craters, the blood soaked ramp, the fear in Oshua Ryler’s eyes as he begged you not to kill him.

“That didn’t deserve it?”  You ask, clenching your eyes tighter at the memory.  “Four.”

And maybe, maybe six or eight months ago, you would’ve begged for some guidance on how to reconcile that.  Hell, maybe a few hours ago, you could’ve used his arms around you exactly like this, his low voice repeating the same things he’s already told you before, over and over again, if only for some semblance of stability when everything feels turbulent and uncertain.  You’ll never be able to change it, though.  This belongs to you now.

This time, all Din says is, “I’m sorry, too.”

And that covers everything.

The silence envelops you both again, but… there’s something else.  Something that still sits deep in your worries, an image that isn’t a scar of what’s happened but a dread of what’s to come.  You need to tell him.  You don’t feel like saying it, you don’t want to speak it aloud for fear of bringing it into existence, but you need to tell him.

“Din?”  You breathe out, and he makes a soft noise in his throat while cuddling you on the floor.  “I saw…,” you whisper, every word sitting tight and reluctant in your throat.  “Right when we made the jump, I was looking through the window and I-I saw…”

“A star destroyer.”  He says it like… like it’s the worst thing in the world and also completely expected at the same time.  He says it like he already knew, yet can’t even imagine.  You lean every bit of your weight against him since you can’t hold him in return, squish him as best you can against the small corner and curl up even tighter in his arms for comfort.

He takes a deep breath, a shuddery sound you don’t think you’ve ever heard him make before.  It holds untold anxiety, unsaid conflict, uncertain action, an unknown path forward.

“I don’t know what to do,” Din eventually whispers to himself, to you, to the baby in your arms.  His voice is barely a breath through the modulator, his fingers digging into your skin with how many emotions he’s repressing.  “What do I do?”

He sounds so distressed that you automatically feel your soul find the floor—instantly, you become steady and calm and you locate all that rationality that kept you going today.  All your worries still twist deep down, all the guilt and the turmoil wrestles with your soft, easy nature until you can only find bits and pieces of it in the most vulnerable places inside you, but if he’s struggling this terribly, then the least you can do is offer some good, true, unwavering faith in times of uncertainty.  You’re in hyperspace, everything worked out, and it’s going to stay that way for right now.  If he doesn’t know how to talk about it yet, then you trust him enough to wait for him.

“It’ll be okay,” you tell him with a newfound confidence and purpose, carefully easing the baby into one arm so that the other can find its way to the other side of his helmet and pull him closer.  Din tucks his head and allows you to brush your lips against the metal, whisper the words soft and steady to him.  “We’ll figure it out together.”

---

@cptnbvcks thank you so much for the incredible art!

[gracejh08]

Breaking the media

Chapter 2 -breaking the news

Surprisingly, the transfer between arsenal and Barcelona had been relatively fast arsenal were quite happy to send you to Barcelona due to the opportunitys it was going to give you. Now here came the part you had forgotten about you had to say goodbye to the people who have made you the player you are now and how well they have took care of you. The group had decided to have a get together in the holidays and you knew this was the only time you could tell them otherwise they will find out about the transfer pretty quickly due to social media. There was definitely some speculation of you moving as you saw the rumor posts on your Instagram feed which made you giggle to yourself knowing they were right but you can't interact with them otherwise your cover is blown.

It was they day of the event and now the nerves had really hit you, you had managed to convince beth and viv to take you because you knew you couldn't face your 'parents' yet. They picked you up and you hopped into the back seat of the car "you all good there y/n " beth asked with an unreadable expression one of worry yet it not slipping over her smiling face. "Yeah im good just jealous that all of yous got a nice tan and ive been stuck here" you remarked half sarcastically but also with a tone of seriousness you were a bit jealous that you couldn't go on holiday. "Yeah yeah well in two years we will bring you with us" viv chimed in smiling at you. The pwang of guilt hit you hard they didn't know you were about to tell them you were leaving the club and now it felt like you couldn't bare the news. "Yeahh that would be nice but i don't wanna be pain on your holidays" you say back "no no you'd never be a pain" beth responded. Yous continued to chat in the car and as every minute past the pit in your stomach grew deeper and was a lot more noticeable.

You walked into the venue to find it nicely decorated and privately booked. Thank god you thought to yourself just incase the tears came along with the news. The night was going well until leah came and sat next to you "hey y/n you've been awfully quiet tonight" she said "yeah im all good just got stuff going on at the moment" you replied not even trying to hide your emotions with leah "what stuff?, better not be you leaving us for barca like the rumors" she said jokingly not understanding that was exactly what was happening. That comment had sent you in a spiral though you couldn't cancel the deal now but your team mates will be so disappointed in you and disgusted that you left them.

You were lost deep in thought until you felt tears on the verge of your eyes "im going to the bathroom" you said standing up dismissing leahs comment. The speed you walked away at was fast but wasn't fast enough to contain your tears to the bathroom you hands wiped across your face as you made your way to the bathroom. You slammed the bathroom stall door with some force and then you let the emotions hit you your legs gave in as you slid to the cold tiled floor and it felt like the walls were caving in and you couldn't breath everything was overwhelming.

Meanwhile leah was sat in confusion and also a hint of panic and she got up shortly after you hadn't returned from the bathroom after a couple of minutes. She hadn't made it into the main area of the bathroom when she heard your sobs through the wall it was heart breaking to hear and yet she didn't know what to do. She knew she couldn't deal with this it had to be beth and viv they had been the people to take you under there wing and look after you. Leah almost legged it to beth and viv who were stood next to eachother in the busy part of the room "beth viv i need your help" leah said so quick that it seemed like she needed the help "whats up leah" beth asked worry knitted through her eyebrows "its y/n she.. i dont know what happened.. i said one thing and she was fine the next minute she stormed off to the bathroom.. and then.. i" leah was rambling her head full of panic and it was viv who took charge of leah. " leah i need you to calm down for me and i will get kim to sit with you but i have to go deal with y/n" she said dragging her to a couch in the bar. She got kim to sit next to her and left them be while her and beth charged to the bathroom.

As the door opened you still hadn't got any better from when leah had checked on you infact it had gotten worse. You suffered from anxiety but it was never this bad well not for the past while it hasnt been this bad. You were so trapped in your own head you had forgot to lock the door properly so here it was beth and viv stood above you staring down at your body crumpled into a ball hyperventilating with your hands over your ears and your eyes clenched. It was a sight neither the older girls had expected to see but both knew what they had to do to hopefully fix it and know what was the reason for it. It was viv who had taken charge of the operation and she sat next to you on the cold tile floor beth followed quickly after. "Hey y/n love its viv, can i touch you" she asked gently after no response viv knew it was worse than she thought and she's going to have to do what she thinks is best.

She reaches for your hand which you grab as if it was your lifeline and this begins to draw you out of your mind "hey hey love look at me" beth said looking at you with the most empathetic look in her eyes her face knitted with worry. You look up at her your face puffy and red from the tears that still poured down your face "oh love its okay" she said as you basically threw yourself at her sobbing into her shoulder drenching her jumper in tears "im sorry, im so sorry" is the only thing you could muster up into beths shoulder "you have nothing to be sorry for love" viv said rubbing circles on your back with her hands "yes i do you're all gonna hate me and its my fault i should have been more responsible" you said this time sniffing the final tears away. "We wont hate you love but you need to tell us whats going on" viv said this time a lot more serious in her tone. You took a deep breath "im.. im going to Barcelona" you said waiting for the wrath of the two of them to tell you that they hate you "omg y/n that amazing, we're so proud of you" beth said pulling you in tighter.

You were shocked they were proud of you, they shouldn't be they should hate you "you're proud of me?" You questioned them looking up with glassy eyes "yes of course we are but we need to tell the rest of the team to celebrate" viv said standing up and dragging you up to your feet. You slowly crept out the bathroom where beth and viv sat you on the nearest seat away from the rest of the team. You had essentially begged the two of them to tell everyone else as you couldn't do it especially after having a panic attack in front of beth and viv. Luckily they agreed but you had to be in the room with them you trundled behind the couple like a lost puppy when they made you sit on chair next to them the suitation almost felt like an intervention "right so y/n has so big news to tell you all but she has asked us to do it for her" beth began to start "so for next season y/n is moving to Barcelona" she said with a smile on her face "omg you're joking y/n thats amazing" russo said to you "well in y/n" said katie following.

You felt positive about moving to Barcelona now and you had plenty people who backed you from a few thousand miles away you felt like this was the right move.

Your life was at peace until it hit the media...

[dizscreams]

Could do a tara carpenter x fem reader

Tara keeps unknowingly friend-zoning r. R can’t take it anymore

*she feels her heart breaking every time tara is flirting with chad despite it being playful and them not having feeling for each other. R is being petty toward them and it makes tara wonder why her “friend” is mad about.*

She decide to move on and go on a date with someone *she is tired of trying and failing at giving hints to tara that she likes her* tara notice her on date with a person and gets a weird feeling even though she doesn’t know why she feeling like this since she assume r has feeling for chad

Mindy helps/spells it out to her very oblivious friends that r loves her *which make tara have a “oh s**t” moment* and have Mindy be her wingwoman to get the girl

Idk why I feel like tara has a naive side to her and I just see her not noticing that r has been giving hints and she doesn’t get until Mindy just blurts it out and she just like “oh? Oh. OH!😳”

I wanna ruin our friendship PT. 1 — Tara Carpenter ★

part two here!

PAIRING: Tara Carpenter x Fem!reader

SUMMARY: Tara can’t get a hint fr, reader gets hurt and Tara gets hurt, this fic is long I’m so sorry. BUT ITS FLUFF DONT WORRY And I suggest looking at the request I’m too lazy to rewrite a really summary

A/N: i love this idea sm 🤭

You sat across from Tara while she sat next to Chad. They were flirting again like they always were and you glared at Mindy and Anika from where you sat for giving you the confidence to come tonight.

The whole group had planned a dinner at a nice restaurant, and Danny was paying. The reason you hadn’t wanted to go was because you’ve had this enormous crush on your best friend, Tara, for ages now, but she never seemed to reciprocate your feelings. Her and Chad were always flirting when you guys were hanging out.

You had tried flirting with Tara like your friends told you but Tara just brushed you off! She was always friend zoning you, maybe you should get the hint. They like each other, right? They’ve got to. But then why was Tara always flirting with you when you guys were alone? It didn’t make any sense but you pushed your thoughts away and messed with the food in front of you as you listened to Tara and Chad’s conversation.

“You’re pretty cute, you know that?”

“Yeah? You think so?”

“Mhm”

That mixed with the laugh Tara let out, you wanted to puke. It wasn’t fair. Sometimes you thought Tara liked you but when Chad was there it was a different story, you just didn’t understand it. But you knew it was making you upset. Flirty comment after flirty comment you felt the grip on your fork get stronger.

How could she not know you liked her? You tried “putting yourself out there” like Mindy said, you tried giving her hints but nothing worked.

“Hey y/n, you okay?”

Snapping you out of your thoughts was Tara’s voice and that’s when you felt her hand on yours, trying to soothe you. “Yeah, I’m perfect,” you said giving her a sarcastic smile to which she furrowed her eyebrows at.

“What’s wrong? You don’t normally act like this.”

You scoff and what you wanted to say was, “Yeah sorry I’m not in the best mood when I’m seeing my crush and my best friends brother flirt with each other right in front of me” but you didn’t of course.

So you settled with, “I’m just not hungry, I guess.”

She wasn’t satisfied with that answer though.

“Cmon let’s talk outside.”

Before you could come up with an excuse Tara had made it to your side of the table and grabbed your hand, pulling you outside.

The cool air hit your face and Tara wasted no time in interrogating you. “What’s gotten into you?” She asked sounding concerned. “Nothing has gotten into me, I’m just tired. It’s been a long day,” you lied, “Why don’t you just go back to Chad?”

Tara was even more confused now. Why was one of her best friends upset with her? “Did I do something?” she asked. You shook your head, “No, I’m just gonna go home.”

You walked away, leaving Tara puzzled and a little hurt. She didn’t understand but you didn’t blame her, you didn’t understand yourself either. why were you pushing her away? why wont you just tell her? why are you so frustrated? Your thoughts raced as you walked back to your shared dorm you had with Mindy and Anika that luckily wasn’t too far of a walk and immediately jump on your bed. You begin to cry into your pillow as you thought of Tara and all the times you’ve tried flirting with her.

You two have always been close so physical touch wasn’t uncommon. You’d always hold hands or when you would have a movie night she’d lay on your shoulder and you’d have your arms around her. In high school when you guys had sleepovers you used to cuddle. One time when the group was hanging out for the night you two were alone and you almost kissed her, but Chad walked in.

You always compliment her, calling her cute or gorgeous. Pet names weren’t uncommon either, sometimes she’d greet you like, “y/n my love, you made it!”

The tears kept coming but you sat up and hugged your pillow and weakly attempted to wipe them away. Maybe it was time to move on, she was clearly interested in Chad more than you. It would hurt trying to move on, you feel like you’ve liked her forever, maybe you even loved her. But if the feelings weren’t reciprocated there was no point in trying anymore.

You looked at your phone and answered some texts from Anika before falling asleep.

It’s been a few days since the dinner and you’ve been avoiding Tara. You honestly didn’t really notice until Mindy told you Tara was worried about you. However, you didn’t want to worry about her right now since you were getting ready for a date. You picked a simple outfit, a cute black shirt with some lace on it and jeans that fit you good. This was going to get your mind off of everything.

You had met your date at a cute little restaurant and you were enjoying yourself. The person was kind and funny but you felt off at the same time. They were sweet sure but there was something missing. You knew you wanted Tara to be the one you were one a date with, but you couldn’t help how things turned out. This was supposed to be good for you, so you pushed your true feelings down.

Tara was out with Quinn walking down the streets of New York. Tara always preferred the city when it was dark, the lights were much prettier. “Hey can we go in here real quick? I just wanna grab a coffee then we can head home,” Quinn said pointing to a cutely lit restaurant with roses out front. Tara nodded, “Sure, I’ll get one too.”

They went inside and took in their surroundings, it was quite a pretty place. Tara figured it was new since she hadn’t seen it before. Tara told Quinn her order and headed to a little bar by a window while Quinn went in line. Tara looked at all the couples passing by the window and she started fantasizing about being in a cutesy romantic relationship like that.

She was about to put her headphones on until she heard something, or someone. She heard you, she heard your laugh and she quickly turned around only to have her heart slightly break at the sight. She saw you with someone else, on a date clearly. They were attractive and you looked happy. You looked beautiful too, you always did. She wasn’t sure why it bothered her so much but it did. It hurt, but she couldn’t bring herself to look away.

Quinn managed to get Tara out of her gaze by tapping her on the shoulder, “Tara, you there?”

She quipped her head to the red head, “Huh? Yeah, I’m fine,” she gave a sad smile and Quinn tilted her head unconvinced. “What were you looking at?” Quinn asks, concerned for her friend. “Uh, Y/n’s here. It just caught me off guard you know? Lets go,” Tara jumped out of her seat and walked out the door and Quinn quickly followed her but not before getting a good look at you and your date.

When they got to their apartment Mindy, Anika, Ethan, and Chad were already there along with Sam and Danny. Tara had given them a small wave when she walked in but immediately went to her room and shut the door. “What’s up with her?” Sam was the first to ask. Quinn sighed, “She saw y/n on a date at a cafe we went to. She’s pretty upset about it and I’m not sure why. I thought she liked Chad,” she said shrugging.

Chad had a confused expression and muttered a ‘What? Me?’ And Mindy rolled her eyes, “She doesn’t like Chad! God, nobody around here can catch a hint, I’ll talk to her,” she said and got up from her seat with Anika, while Anika let out a small snicker.

Mindy softly knocked on the door, “T? You in there?” She heard nothing but a muffled ‘Yeah!’ on the other side of the door allowing her to open it. “Quinn told me,” Mindy said sitting down on the mattress while Tara sat up groaning, “I don’t get it. I kinda thought she liked Chad-“

“Chad!” Mindy yelled at the girl, “What do you mean Chad?! What is it with everyone and Chad today?!”

“Well, at dinner the other night she was upset and she said something about me going back to Chad or something,” Tara mumbled.

Now it was Mindy’s turn to groan, “Tara, oh my god! She likes you, you big idiot! She’s like in love with you and she’s been sending all these signals and she’s been calling me nonstop about how you don’t get any of them! You’re always flirting with Chad!” Mindy rambled and Tara’s jaw was on the floor. You liked her? No, you loved her?! Since when? She’s liked you for so long and you thought she liked Chad? She can’t blame you cause she thought you liked Chad.

Tara looked at Mindy wide eyed and processed everything that was just said to her. “Wait y/n thought I liked Chad? I flirt with him as a joke.”

Mindy sighed, “Well tell y/n that. Do you like her back?”

“Of course I do!”

“Then tell her!” Mindy said standing and Tara shot up from her seat on the bed and grabbed her phone. She shooed Mindy out of her room and called you and prayed you’d answer. Lucky for her, you did, cause you missed her more then she knew. “Hello? Y/n? I’m coming to your dorm right now can you meet me there, it’s important.”

IM SORRY IT FEELS SO MEAN NOT ADDING THE CONFESSION BUT THIS SEEMED SO LONG I DIDNT THINK ANYONE WOULD WANT TO READ THAT MUCH 😭😭😭

[yippeerrrs]

PLEASEEE🙏🙏 DO A PART TWO OF THE READERXGHOSTXKONIG

"I'm here for you."

Pt. 2 of "i'm sorry"

I was waiting for my ipad but i just got this idea and i dont wanna put it to waste 😭😭

As you bump into simon, könig catches you, holding you tight. You notice his eyes are watery and that he's about to cry, you scoff.

"we're done könig."

You stand up, noticing simon you give him a weak smile and walk again. Konig is a mess behind you, he was hurt. He felt so many emotions passting through him. He truly was sorry, it took him everything to not break down in the middle of the base right there and then. He quietly gets up and everyone who was looking at your outburst moves to make way for the giant. Ghost stood there, dumbfounded and concerned.

--

Ghost went to könig's office, obviously curious and concerned.

"What happened back there?"

Ghost looks around the room, noticing it was dark and he could hear sniffling in the corner, where he saw könig crying.

"You alright mate?"

He asks, concern in his voice.

"i fucked up, ghost."

Ghost sits next to him, comforting him the best he can.

"There's plenty of fish in the sea colonel, you'll find some-"

Konig cuts him off, clearly irritated.

"There's no one better. I fucked up, she gave me a chance and i fucked up."

They sit there in silence for a while, ghost awkwardly trying his best to comfort konig.

--

You were pissed. You drove back home, fighting back your tears. He wasnt worth it. No. He was, but if he chose to cheat on you like that, sober. It was just not worth it.

You sobbed and banged your head on the steering wheel in a red light, you were angry, pissed. You trusted him, you were there for him in his lowest.

It suddenly started raining, hard. The pit pattering of the raindrops on your car muffling your cries. The light had turned green-- or so you thought. You drove through a red light and BAM! a speeding truck hit your side of the car and knocked you out.

There you were, dying. Ironically like the ones in the movies where the wife dies first, you chuckle as your memories pass by.

---

One, König holding up a chocolate bar so you wouldn't reach it, laughing at your desparate attempts on trying to grab it.

Two, movie night with konig after he was too tired to do anything after his mission, you two cuddled together and just enjoyed eachother's company while watching a barbie movie.

Three, König dropping all of his shields after you confessed to him, crying in your arms.

"Really? Meine liebe.. i'll be here for you forever, i won't ever betray you"

He whispered in your ear between sobs of happiness. You always thought if you were to die you'd die in his arms, and yet here you are. Dying alone.

"I'm sorry könig.."

You whispered in staggered breaths, finally letting yourself feel the embrace of sweet death.

--

"Would you really let her go just like that?!"

Simon hissed, slapping könig. König looked at him, fonally realizing what he had just done. He grabs his keys and starts to sprint to his car, planning to apologize. Simon following him close behind, Simon was also very concerned about you- worried even, you two had been best friends ever since you met, you had helped him through his worst times. He had a crush on you but the way he saw you look at könig.. he had to push it away to be a good friend for you, doing anything to keep you happy.

Konig drives off with simon, stopping by and buying flowers for you even. When he reached your house, his heart stopped. There were police cars and sirens. He went out in the rain, leaving the flowers in the car as he went to ask for an officer what was happening. But before he could ask the police turns around and asks him a question that gives his gut a feeling that it wasn't a good sign.

"Do you know the person who lives here?"

He nods, worried.

"What's wrong?"

"Are you König?"

He nods again, suspicion raising.

"She's in the hospital, i suggest checking up on her now."

König's heart drops, rushing back to the car even though soaking wet- he drives over the speed limit and gets to the nearby hospital, startling ghost.

"Woah mate calm down! What's wrong?"

The moment they park and ghost sees where they are, he gets the idea. Both of them feeling their heart pumping a little too much, scared. They go into the hospital, rushing to your bedside. König grabs your cold hand, his tears falling down.

"I'm so sorry.. im so so sorry shatz"

As simon sees the situation, he loses it all. He's pissed and he knows who to blame, whose fault this was. Who fucked up. This was when he snapped, losing all of his cool, he pushes könig.

"Why?! WAS SHE NOT GOOD ENOUGH?!"

Simon yells, angry tears falling and his mask drying it up. König stays quiet, knowing it was in fact his fault, his fault this happened, his fault he messed up, everything was his fault. He sits down next to your hospital bed and caresses your hair gently.

"I could've treated her better. You promised nothing would happen to her."

Simon's fists roll up as he looks down, tears falling as he finally let the reality of all of this happening. Before he could pounce on könig a doctor comes in, informing them that you had a miscarriage. The crash had taken your baby's life. But not yours, you had a chance to live still, they calculated that you would have to stay in the hospital for a couple weeks until they could let you go.

Simon was dumbfounded, confusion and anger on his face. As soon as the doctor left he walked over to könig, grabbing him by the collar of his shirt.

"You got her pregnant then cheated on her?!"

"I can explain!"

Simon scoffs, letting go of könig.

"Go ahead, explain."

Silence fills the room as könig looks away, not having an explanation for everything. Simon chuckles, still pissed.

"Get out."

"What?.."

"Did you not hear me?"

Ghost leans in, pissed.

"Get. Out."

König sighs, he looks at your unconscious body with tears in his eyes, mumbling an apology under his breath before going out of the room.

Ghost sits down beside you, holding your hand oh so lovingly as he wipes his tears and pulls you close for a hug, making sure you're alright.

"I'm here for you"

---

A/N

Okay i srs tried my best i gave up because damn this is wayy too cheezy and corny for me bye (end my life) please tell me how to write omfg.

[kittyamore0]

Hey there!! Can I get an Ethan landry scenario where the apartment Scene in scream six Isn’t him but Quinn as ghostface and reader goes through what Anika does after Ethan told Quinn not to do anything to them?? Thank you!

A/N: i was so pissed because i loved Anika and that whole scene gave me 36 panic attacks and 67 heart attacks!

Knocking at death's door...

°｡⋆𓋼𓍊☆𓍊𓋼⋆｡°°｡⋆𓋼𓍊☆𓍊𓋼⋆｡°°｡⋆𓋼𓍊☆𓍊𓋼⋆｡°°｡⋆𓋼𓍊☆𓍊𓋼⋆｡°°｡⋆𓋼𓍊☆𓍊𓋼⋆｡°°｡⋆𓋼𓍊☆𓍊𓋼⋆｡°

°｡⋆𓋼𓍊☆𓍊𓋼⋆｡°°｡⋆𓋼𓍊☆𓍊𓋼⋆｡°°｡⋆𓋼𓍊☆𓍊𓋼⋆｡°°｡⋆𓋼𓍊☆𓍊𓋼⋆｡°°｡⋆𓋼𓍊☆𓍊𓋼⋆｡°°｡⋆𓋼𓍊☆𓍊𓋼⋆｡°

RATING: SFW

PAIRNG: ETHAN LANDRY X GN! READER TAGS: @kittiescrownedsoul, @zspen

FANDOM/GENRE: Scream 6, ghost face, dark romance, horror

POV: 2ND POV

WRITING STYLE: one-shot, slight angst

Reminder: Do NOT translate, transfer, modify, copy or steal my ideas!

CW: Attempted murder, faked death, blood, height mentions, GN! Reader, swearing, shouting/screaming

°｡⋆𓋼𓍊☆𓍊𓋼⋆｡°°｡⋆𓋼𓍊☆𓍊𓋼⋆｡°°｡⋆𓋼𓍊☆𓍊𓋼⋆｡°°｡⋆𓋼𓍊☆𓍊𓋼⋆｡°°｡⋆𓋼𓍊☆𓍊𓋼⋆｡°°｡⋆𓋼𓍊☆𓍊𓋼⋆｡°

The cold wind hits your face hard, your body trembles at the sight below you. The fall was too high. Banging of someone trying to break in can be heard from behind you, Ghostface.

Ever since receiving that picture on your phone about Ethan 'dying,' things just went downhill. Now, leading to you being on a timer at death's door.

"Oh, god...I can't do it, I can't do it...!" You sobbed as Anika frantically gestured to you to hurry as fast as possible. The drawer wasn't going to hold Ghostface for so long.

You began slowly crawling over, your breathing uneven. "You can do it! That's it! That's it!" Sam and Anika shouted.

You sobbed, as you noticed Sam, Mindy, and Anika had gone quiet, staring at what was not you, but behind you...

"What?" You stared at the back, confused. "[Name], you have to move right now!" Mindy shouted and pointed behind you.

You turned around to see Ghostface stabbing his knife beside the ladder. "No! No!" You gripped onto the ladder weakly, your heart hammering in your chest.

"Move!"

"You gotta move!" Sam and Mindy tried reaching out to you, but the ladder suddenly shook back and forth and up and down. "Stop! Stop!" You ducked down your hugged the ladder, as Ghostface violently shook it.

"[Name], MOVE!" Anika cried. "Anika, I don't wanna die!" Your heart felt like it had stopped when Ghostface lifted up the ladder and tilted it. "No, no, no! Stop it! You fucker!" Mindy gabbed onto what she could of the ladder.

To their surprise, you didnt fall. You stuck on to the ladder and hugged it for your dear life. Legs tangled and curled on the steps, arms engulfing the sides, but you were upside down. There was still a chance for your downfall.

"What...? Mindy stuck her head through the ladder to see a distressed you. Sam, and Anika laughed in relief and disbelief. "Im still alive! Oh, shit!" Seeing you still clinging to the ladder had gotten him furious. He started shaking the ladder up and down again.

Until, all sudden movements stopped, and you almost slipped because they stopped during his mid-shaking-the ladder. You craned your neck to look up slightly. Two Ghostafce, but they didnt look like they were helping each other...no...they were...fighting?

Another Ghostface appeared, but swung a punch at the Ghostface trying to kill you. "What..?" Sam whispered and Anika just stared in shock.

Suddenly, the second Ghostface comes up to the window. "[Name], go...GO, NOW!" He shouted with his deep, moderated voice. That was enough to get you going, because even though you were backwards, you started crawling up slowly. One by one...

Sam, Mindy, and Anika cheered as they picked you up. Anika arms held under your arms, Mindy was holding your stomach, and Sam got your legs. They hauled you in the apartment on the count of three.

Anika, and Mindy hugged you. "You did it! You did it...!" Anika cheered. Sam crouched down and came up behind you.

"What was that..?" You shook your head. "I dont know...I think that Ghostface knows us, or rather...me."

°｡⋆𓋼𓍊☆𓍊𓋼⋆｡°°｡⋆𓋼𓍊☆𓍊𓋼⋆｡°°｡⋆𓋼𓍊☆𓍊𓋼⋆｡°°｡⋆𓋼𓍊☆𓍊𓋼⋆｡°°｡⋆𓋼𓍊☆𓍊𓋼⋆｡°°｡⋆𓋼𓍊☆𓍊𓋼⋆｡°

°｡⋆𓋼𓍊☆𓍊𓋼⋆｡°°｡⋆𓋼𓍊☆𓍊𓋼⋆｡°°｡⋆𓋼𓍊☆𓍊𓋼⋆｡°°｡⋆𓋼𓍊☆𓍊𓋼⋆｡°°｡⋆𓋼𓍊☆𓍊𓋼⋆｡°°｡⋆𓋼𓍊☆𓍊𓋼⋆｡°

[annymation]

The Kingdom of Wishes- A “Wish” Rewrite

Chapter 6- And The Star Answered

Chapter 5

She stopped, her arm was being held back by a large hand.

Asha’s heart was beating as fast as a hummingbird’s wings.

She didn’t want to look back, she was too afraid to look and see the king’s face-

“Asha… We were all waiting for you. Are you okay?”

That wasn’t the king’s voice, it was a gentle and genuinely worried voice, that was

“… Simon?”

Asha turned around, and sure enough, Simon was holding her arm.

And Asha’s other 6 friends were by his side, they were all very worried about her.

“Why are you crying? What happened in there??” Hal rushed over to dry her tears.

“Did you just break out of the dungeon?!? By yourself?!? How did you do that???” Gabo tripped over his words

“For the LAST TIME, GABO! They would NEVER throw Asha in a dungeon for just raising her voice at them, they’re too nice for that!” Dahlia explained like that was just common sense.

And in any other kingdom, yeah it probably would be common sense, but Asha knew that wasn’t the case in Rosas.

Knowing what she knows now.

“Everyone please, let's all calm down and go talk somewhere quieter, then Asha can tell us what happened” Bazeema chimed in meekly

But Asha didn’t want to calm down and talk, no, she wanted to be alone, she was in no condition to talk with anyone.

“I- I gotta go! I can’t talk with you guys right now…”

She tried to run away again but Simon kept holding her arm, not in a way that hurted though

“Why? We just wanna help. Did they say something that made you upset?” Simon asked very concerned

Dario ran to be in front of Asha so she could see him signing to her “We’re with you on this, you did the right thing speaking up about your grandpa’s wish”

Her friends kept talking all at the same time over each other

But Asha's mind was somewhere else

How can she explain this to them?

“I- I understand wanting to be alone, Asha, I really do, but you’re clearly under a lot of stress” Bazeema stammered through her words.

That everything they've known was a lie…

“You can count on us, we’ll always be on your side” Dahlia tried to soothe her best friend

Would they even believe it?

“Just breathe, we know you didn’t do anything wrong” said Safi

And if they did, then what? They’re just a group of teens, it’s not like there’s anything they can do.

“You’ve always been there for us, so we are NOT leaving your side till you’re feeling better” Hal said determined

Asha is in danger because she knows the king’s secret, she CAN’T risk putting her friends in danger too

Gabo was the only one who didn’t look worried, he was angry, not at Asha, but at the two monarchs who made his best friend cry

“Was that narcissistic dolt rude to you?! If so, I’mma get in that castle RIGHT NOW and give him a piece of my min-“

“NO!” Asha screamed “WHATEVER YOU DO, DONT TALK TO THEM!” She was scared out of her mind.

Asha’s friends were startled, they finally went silent

Asha lowered her voice but kept trying to struggle out of Simon’s grip

“I- I’m sorry. Simon, please, let go of me— I gotta go”

“Go where!?” Dahlia asked

“I- i’ll be fine, really, I just need to be alone for a while, okay?”

Simon, for the first time since the day he gave away his wish 3 years ago, raised his voice:

“I’m not letting go till you tell us what you did!”

… What SHE did?…

Asha looked at him straight in the eyes, no longer just sad and scared, but also angry

“You wanna know what happened so badly?! What happened is that THEY WON’T GRANT MY WISH AT ALL!”

She stepped on Simon’s foot.

He let go of her.

She ran, pushing Dario and Safi out of her way in the process

“ASHA WAIT!!!” Dahlia screamed

Hal, Dario and Gabo started running after her, but of course Gabo threw one last piece of sass while running

“VICTIM BLAMING huh Simon?? Because THAT’S definitely the best way to calm down your crying friend! Great job buddy!” He said sarcastically and angrily to Simon while he ran after Asha.

(Gabo spitting facts)

All the others who stayed behind look sad, but Simon looks the saddest.

Asha can hear her friends calling her as she runs away from the castle, but she keeps running without looking back

Dario, Hal and Gabo eventually lose sight of her.

As Asha runs she keeps seeing the royals faces literally everywhere.

All her life that felt natural, why wouldn’t the people of Rosas want to paint their beloved rulers faces on the floors, walls and have statues of them everywhere?

But now, now that she knows who they really are, seeing how the people are obsessed with them is terrifying.

Eventually, after A LOT of running, she leaves the kingdom

She reaches the forest

Valentino is hopping after her with his little baby goat legs

Tears are running down her face non stop

Asha felt trapped, hopeless, desperate

She knew that by morning “her wish” will be granted

And she’ll lose her free will, her friends and her own sense of self

The king and queen will steal all of that from her and there’s nothing she can do about it.

Eventually she trips and falls on the floor

We get a shot similar to this one from Snow White

She sobs in the darkness

Valentino is now next to her, trying to help her feel better by licking her hand

That actually helps her a little, at least she’s not completely alone

She sits down and Valentino comes lay down on her lap

(Seriously little things like this make Valentino MILES better than he was in the movie, movie Valentino didn’t do ANYTHING to help Asha emotionally)

She starts petting him and takes some deep breaths

“Should I have told them?” She asks Valentino “... I wanted to, but– then what? It's not like there's anything we can do to stop them, we're just some teens…”

Valentino interrupts her bleating loudly, with a frustrated expression

She finally smiles a little bit “Right, some teens and a goat hehe…” she pets Valentino some more, her look becomes distant again “… I don’t know what to do…”

She feels a turmoil of emotions that she can’t put into words

And what does a Disney protagonist does when emotions are too strong for words?

… They sing

Sooo yeah, here’s my version of This Wish, enjoy!

Purple lines are Asha, of course

Orange is my commentary and describing what’s going on in the scene

Should’ve listened to my own instincts

No time to cry for what could have been

If I could show them everything I've seen

Open their eyes to all the lies then

Would they believe in me or in them?

(Asha begins singing still laying on the floor, she takes her sketchbook and at "Would they believe in me or in THEM" we see a drawing of the king and queen, she sketched them a few times since there's images of them all over Rosas so she might as well practice drawing poses using their likeness, right?)

Cause’ when I speak, they tell me, "Sit down"

But how can I when I've already started runnin'?

All I wanted to do

Was grant my wish on my own

But now that wish’s stolen and, I am all alone

(So when she sings "Started running" she gets up. And she walks through the forest, she's looking down as she walks looking very sorrowful)

So I look up at the stars to guide me

For I know they can send me a sign

If knowing what it could be is what drives me

Then let me be the first to stand in line

(“THROWING CAUTION TO EVERY WARNING SIGN”IS SUCH A WEIRD LYRIC AND IT COULD’VE BEEN FIXED SO EASILY! I NEVER STUDIED MUSIC WRITING IN MY LIFE AND I THOUGHT ABOUT THAT REPLACEMENT IN A SECOND WTF DISNEY!?)

(*ahem* so anyway, she looks up, now recollecting her hopes but... Once she looks up, there are no stars in the sky, because she's deep in the forest and all she sees are the tree leaves... So this is Asha's goal in this song, she's looking for a star to wish upon, she's trying to get out of the darkness)

So I make this wish

Asking us for freedom, hope and bliss

So I make this wish

To have something more for us than this

(She keeps walking while looking up, searching for any star to be wished upon.)

(Now let me break down my personal favorite change here "Freedom, hope and bliss" these three words summarizes everything Asha wants for herself and everyone else: Freedom for herself, now that she knows the royals intend to imprison her, and also freedom for everyone else that is having their wishes changed; Hope, because she wants the people of Rosas to have hope that they can achieve their own wishes without the king's help; And bliss, the joy that comes with achieving your own desires, she wants that for herself and everyone else)

(As she sings the last line, she steps on a field of grass and some fireflies start floating around her)

Hey, yeah, yeah, yeah

Hey, yeah, yeah, yeah, ah-ah

More than this, oh-ah-ah-ah

(The fireflies fly all around her and her smile returns to her face, as she regains a little bit of hope, she sings "More than this" with her hands on her chest)

For many years they’ve been fooling us all

Yeah, they said “We’ll protect you” while being our downfall

Now what’s a girl like me supposed to do?

How do you fight a king and queen? oh and they’ve got magic too!

(We have a bit of a time skip with Asha still walking around the forest, but as she does so she's flipping through the pages of her sketchbook, and tearing off all the ones that have sketches of King Magnifico and Queen Amable. She looks at each one angrily and crumbles the pages in her hands (I'll excuse littering this one time because the girl is going through the 7 stages of grief and is currently at anger))

And all I've got is reservations and hesitations

On where I should even begin

I'm past dipping my toes in

But I'm not, no, I'm not past diving in

If I could just be pointed in any given direction

On where to go and what to do

My legs are shaking, but my head's held high

The way you always taught me to

(Yeah no changes for this verse, it’s fantastically fitting for my rewrite, and the best part of the song in my opinion. As she’s walking in the woods she encounters many different paths, she looks at all of them unsure on which one to choose. She trusts her gut and picks one of them. Asha run through this path she chose and then… She finds the tree she and her grandfather used to sit on and wish upon the stars together)

So I look up at the stars to guide me

For I know they WILL send me a sign

I'm sure there will be challenges that find me

But I can take them on one at a time

(Her heart swells, she’s full of hope as she runs to that tree knowing without a doubt in her mind that she’ll get a sign on what to do. She climbs the tree determined, and upon reaching the top, she sees it, the first star she sees tonight.)

So I make this wish

Asking us for freedom, hope and bliss

So I make this wish

To have something more for us than this

(The star she’s looking at is not very bright at all, is barely noticeable in the vast night sky full of other brighter ones, but THAT little one is the one she chooses, and she puts all her heart on the wish she’s making to this star)

Hey, yeah, yeah, yeah (so I make this wish)

Hey, yeah, yeah, yeah, ah-ah (to have something more)

More than this, oh, ah-ah-ah

So I make this wish

To have something more for us than this

The song ends.

We see the night sky... and suddenly... The tiny star that Asha was looking at starts getting brighter, bigger, until it's light engulfs the entire sky.

Asha closes her eyes.

The light proceeds to shine upon all the kingdom of Rosas, and everyone that is touched by that light is overtaken by a pleasant feeling of joy and warmth.

It's very faint, but if you listen closely you can hear the sound of a laughter, the most energetic and youthful laughter you can imagine.

We cut back to Asha, who notices that the light is getting... closer.

And it looks like a big ball of light.

Coming directly in her direction at high speed.

She screams as she quickly grabs Valentino and jumps off the tree branch to get cover.

The bright light passes flying over them and landing deep into the forest. A few animals run away from the place of impact.

Asha is laying down on the grass. Obviously VERY shocked.

Valentino is under her, excitedly trying to get out to check out what that was.

"... As if this day couldn't get any crazier, I almost get hit by a meteor... On my birthday " She's quite done with all of these emotions for the day. She stands up and starts dusting herself off "Come on Val, we better go before... Whatever THAT was starts a forest fire..."

(Any other Disney protagonist would be like "oooh whats that?" and answer the call to adventure, but our girl already had enough adventure for a life time and we are not even in the second act yet ladies and gentleman)

Asha had her eyes closed while she dusted herself off, so she didn't realize that while she was talking Valentino was already happily hopping to the source of the light

She looks to where Valentino was a second ago, aaaaand he's gone

"... Valentino?"

"Maaaa! Maaa! Maaaa"

She heard Valentino's bleating getting farther and farther away... Honestly what was she expecting?

"NO! VALENTINO!! Bad goat! We don't touch stuff that comes from space! IT BURNS!!!" She runs after him.

(Oh it's gonna burn you alright)

...

(Okay I knooooow ya'll are gonna hate me for this but... *sigh*)

We cut to the villains POV

Magnifico is getting ready to use his magic to open the tower's celling, thus releasing all the wishes to be granted that night.

But he stops when he realizes... The room is getting brighter.

He looks out the window and sees it, the light engulfing his whole kingdom.

He stares at it in shock

Once the light fades away, Magnifico is gazing out the window. His face no longer visible.

We hear the BLAM of a door opening violently, the queen is running towards her husband wearing a night gown, her long hair is loose.

"What on earth was that light?!” She speaks loudly, firm and precise, confident that her husband will know the answer.

Magnifico is, for the first time since they've met, not paying attention to her...

Nah his mind is somewhere else entirely.

He looks at the horizon trying to remember something, like a memory he has been repressing but now he really REALLY needs it...

Amaya notices his distant gaze and becomes worried "... Mi rei? Is everything alright?… You think it might be a threat?"

He keeps staring at nothing until suddenly…

He starts mumbling a poem, as if he's remembering the words as he speaks:

“Shining guide of old

Guiding hearts

As bright as gold

To a desire far too grand

To be granted by a mortal hand”

“… EXCUSE ME?!?” Amaya is now even more lost, what’s he talking about?

Magnifico proceeds to the next verse ignoring his wife’s reaction… It’s like he’s trying really hard to remember the whole thing.

“With hair like light

And eyes like prism

That see the truth

And speak through rhythm”

"Darling, what is this nonsense? You're scaring me" She sounds, for the first time in the story, genuinely scared

"Do not fret, they mean no harm

As all they bring is joy and warmth

So if you see the sUN AT NIGHT

KNOW A WISHING STAR IS CLOSE IN SIGHT"

He remembered. A sun at night. That was it.

He turned to his wife with the smile of a mad man.

"I KNEW IT!" He starts laughing maniacally as he lifts her up in his arms and starts twirling around the room

Amaya is not in the mood for his romantic acts at the moment tho

"PUT ME DOWN! WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS???" She usually loves her husband's eccentricities but this is too much even for him

He puts her down and tries to calm himself, still laughing while holding her by the shoulders "Forgive me my love, but you have no idea what a joyous occasion this is!"

"Well, perhaps I would if you stopped and explained to me" She’s out of patience.

"Listen. I know what that light was, I've grew up with stories about what it means, it's a sign that a being with power beyond our imagination has arrived in our kingdom" He explains like it's the most amazing thing that has ever happened to them.

Her eyebrows raise "... In what WORLD that's a joyous occasion?!"

"Oh but you misunderstand my queen, that power can be OURS… if we play our cards right." A sinister grin forms on his face "I just need to find one of my father’s old books, so I may recall the spell to absorb the being’s power"

That get's her attention "I see... But what exactly is that being?"

"… A Star" He says it in whisper as he starts walking out the room, his steps become quicker the closer he gets to the door "You may go to bed without me darling, it will take me all night to find that blasted book, but it’ll be worth it!"

"ALL NIGHT?! But, darling I-"

But he already left the room

"Oh this is going to be GREAT, just you wait my beldam! Sweet dreams!"

His voice gets farther and farther away as he runs down the stairs

Leaving a very perplexed and alone queen in the wishes room.

Magnifico won't be granting any wishes tonight.

(*phew* okay at least the scene with them is brief and it builds up Aster more with the poem... Btw did you guys like the poem? I think it turned out pretty sweet)

So we cut back to Asha's POV

Valentino pops out of some bushes, he's a few feet away from the source of the light

Asha finally catches him

"GOTCHA! HAha-" She sees what fell from the sky. It a blob of light and sparkly dust that shifts and moves around... Like it's trying to take shape "oh… wow"

She picks Valentino in her arms slowly while still staring in awe to the mysterious light.

"This is... Definitely NOT a meteor... We better go, this thing might be dan-"

A hand pops out of the light and grabs the floor.

Asha get's startled by that and hides behind the bushes.

She watches as the light keeps changing shape, she's scared but she's also... Curious.

The light forms a second arm, and then, with now both arms, it starts using them to shape the rest of itself, like a it's playing with clay.

After trying a few different body types the light takes the shape of a 5 feet tall skinny young individual, but yet with no features.

the now "teenager shaped" light starts to manifest clothes on his body, a black outfit reminiscent of something Asha would often see a prince wear in her fairytale books when she was little.

Then a large cape emerges from his back, flowing in the air with a trail of stardust underneath it.

His whole body starts coloring itself, his skin is no longer made of light, he has tan brown skin.

The only part of them that is still emitting light is his hair, that dances around slightly like the flame of a candle.

After ALL that (that would probably be a pretty quick transformation sequence, think of it like in Steven universe when the gems reform) he is now floating with his back turned to Asha, who is still hiding behind the bushes.

Asha is staring at all this no longer scared but more so intrigued, she looks closer and she realizes that somehow the boy looks like... A drawing... A moving drawing

He is 2D while everything else is animated in 3D

The being then finally speaks, while stretching their whole body:

"WOOOAH HAHAHA Okayyyyy I definitely underestimated how high up I was hahah!" It's a voice full of energy, like they can't contain their excitement, he stretches himself out some more as if to get used to their new form "Wow that was a rough landing hehehe but hey! Not too bad for my first time!"

(I picture him being voiced by Jordan Fisher but you're free to picture any voice you'd like)

The young man is gleefully laughing to himself.

He seems distracted enough for Asha to run away, so she get's up holding Valentino.

But almost as soon as she turns around she's now face to face with the boy flying above her, he's upside down. He gazes at her with bright eyes that seem to sparkle like the night sky and smiling ear to ear.

"Hi there! I heard you cal-"

"AAAAH!!!"

Asha backs away and accidentally let's go of Valentino. The goat prepares to jump on star to attack him with his little baby goat horns

"Woah woah buddy it's alright, I'm here to help-"

Aaaaand I'll just let this piece of concept art speak for itself:

"hahHAAHA that tickled" The star says while he's reforming himself back to his original shape.

Valentino looks upset that his attempt to protect Asha didn't work.

The star notices that and tries to make him feel better "Hey don't be sad, I'm sure you can land a hit on me, come on try again!" He says genuinely, like a big brother trying to be encouraging.

Valentino does try again, and this time the star makes himself fall on the floor upon being hit "OOH I've been defeated oh nooo hehehe" He says playfully while lifting Valentino up in his arms, whose now very proud of himself.

Asha watches all of this play out and she goes from scared to endeared by the boy's child like demeanor with Valentino, it's pretty obvious now that he means no harm.

She approaches them slowly looking down on the boy playing with her goat. She's still unsure what to expect but she really wants to understand what this is all about, what he is all about.

The star notices her approaching and stops playing with the goat, they gaze up to her with a beaming smile. Now Valentino is just bleating while standing on his chest like he's asking to play more.

It's an interesting contrast that now he's the one who's bellow gazing up to her, when a few minutes ago she was the one looking up to wish upon them.

"H-hi there" This time it's Asha's turn to say it, she gives the star a little wave.

He seems surprised upon hearing her voice, like it's the first time they hear a voice from up close... Well, because it is, this is the first time a human speaks directly to them... and its HER voice.

A few flowers start growing and blooming around where he's laying down. He realizes that and just reacts with a:

"Huh... Didn't know I could do this... Wonder what else can I do" The star says that second part in a whisper.

The star get's up with Valentino in his arms and hands him back to Asha

"I'm awfully sorry, I didn't mean to frighten you." He notices a firefly flying close to Asha and starts trying to catch it, he’s flying around but still explaining the situation to her

She’s just watches them trying to catch the firefly kinda amused, it’s cute how easily distracted he is.

"See, I just got so thrilled when I heard you calling me that I completely forgot I had to choose what shape I’d take BEFORE I landed here heh heh that was weird, wasn't it?" The star manages to catch the firefly in his hands, his smiles widens as they look at the little bug closely, he’s fascinated by it.

"... Called you? I didn't call you, I don't even know your name" Asha says while studying him with her eyes, she's mostly amazed that he looks like a drawing but at the same time has dimension to him.

The star turns to her in surprise, like she just reminded him of something really important

"Oh yeah! I need a name, don't I? Hmmm" They ponder a little bit like he's deciding "I think I'll call myself... Aster, yeah that sounds nice, and fitting too since it means star." He says casually, looking around as they speak.

Aster starts flying around the woods, wanting to take a closer look at each little detail with wonder in their eyes, but still speaking to Asha, who’s watching him fly around amazed by the sight

"And of course you called me! You looked at me and wished for more, to yourself and your people, remember?”

Aster starts flying faster and faster, we see a trail of star dust coming out of his cape, leaving waves of light around the woods. He speaks louder so Asha can still hear:

“I'm so glad you wished upon me out of everyone else by the way! Thank you!... You were the first to do so in a while" Aster speaks that last line with a subtle hint of pain in his voice, but he’s still smiling.

Asha starts out very confused by what he's saying but slowly starts to connect the dots, her eyes widen and her jaw drops once the realization hits her.

"Wait hold on, you're- Are you telling me you’re a... A star?!" She exclaims in awe with a wide smile on her face.

Aster flies back to Asha and stops above her head, floating upside down

“You guessed it!”

Chapter 7

Final Thoughts

THIS CHAPTER TOOK ME SO LONG TO GET IT RIGHT!! Not only because I wanted it to be perfect but also because I've been so busy these past few days!

ASTER IS SUCH A SWEETIE I LOVE MY BOY SO MUCH!!! FIRST THING HE DOES IS PLAY WITH VALENTINO AND THAT IMMEDIATELY MAKES ASHA WARM UP TO HIM BECAUSE HOW CAN YOU NOT TRUST A GUY THAT PLAYS WITH BABY ANIMALS?!

Also Aster forgetting that he had to manifest a human like appearance before crashing down on earth is the equivalent of you going for your first day on a job NAKED and then you dress up there in front of your boss, like the boy is THAT excited to get there.

Did you catch that Aster quoted two Disney characters? He made a few flowers bloom and said “What else can I do” like Isabela from Encanto, and then he said “I’m awfully sorry, I didn’t mean to frighten you” which is a line Prince Phillip says in Sleeping Beauty when he meets Aurora, expect a lot more references like these coming from him. He’s not gonna speak only in Disney quotes all the time but I’ll sprinkle some references in his dialogue here and there.

And speak of him SPEAKING I might make a whole blog explaining why Jordan Fisher is hands down the best choice to voice an embodiment of magic and joy, because that man is not only AN AMAZING SINGER but also just the sweetest person alive, and he’s so underrated! If you don’t know him then look him up on Spotify or YouTube, but here’s an example of him singing: https://youtu.be/KsRi-Aj9fQs?si=RRI8Jvy7AT9EA5_u

It still cracks me up how my version of Magnifico is literally a fun house mirror version of movie Magnifico.

Like Movie Mag was like “oooh noo, what was th-that scary light😣? Someone threatened meee 🥺 I’m so scared I’m gonna use dark magic even though I’m not even sure if it was a bad thiiiing” while my Magnifico is like “*recites mysterious poem* LETS GOOOO AMAYA LETS GOOOOOOO!!! THATS WHAT IM TALKING ABOUT THATS WHAT IVE BEEN WAITING FOR WOOOOOO!! *leaves with no explanation*” like what a chad. And I don’t even have to explain how Movie and Amaya and Queen Amable are opposites because come on.

I reallyyyy hope you guys enjoyed this little taste of Aster I’ve gave here, because next chapter will be aaaaall about them and Asha, so look forward to that! And as always

Thank You For Reading!

[sebbianas]

i have finally sat down and did the math so here’s all the speak now songs and what marauders ship i think of for each and what lyric stands out to me

Mine - wolfstar - braced myself for the goodbye ‘cause that's all I've ever known then you took me by surprise you said, "I'll never leave you alone"

Sparks fly - jegulus - it's just wrong enough to make it feel right

Back to december - jegulus - you gave me all your love and all I gave you was goodbye

Speak now - nobleflower - you wish it was me, you wish it was me dont you

Dear john - lily about snape - you are an expert at “sorry” and keeping lines blurry

Mean - mary’s theme song - someday i’ll be big enough so you cant hit me (her outliving all the people who tormented her)

The story of us - black brothers - this is looking like a contest of who can act like they care less but I liked it better when you were on my side

Never grow up - black brothers/black sisters - I won't let nobody hurt you won't let no one break your heart and even though you want to please, try to never grow up

Enchanted - pandalily - my thoughts will echo your name until i see you again

Better than revenge - rosekiller (in their toxic era) - you might have him but i always get the last word

Innocent - regulus’ theme song - today is never too late to be brand new

Haunted - jegulus - stood there and watched you walk away from everything we had but I still mean every word I said to you

Last Kiss - jegulus - And I feel you forget me like I used to feel you breathe

Long Live - marauders to each other - I had the time of my life with you

Ours - marylily - seems like there's always someone who disapprove they'll judge it like they know about me and you and the verdict comes from those with nothing else to do the jury's out, but my choice is you

Superman - (not marauders but) drarry - And you'll leave, got places to be, and I'll be okay I always forget to tell you, "I love you" I loved you from the very first day

Electric touch - dorlene - all I know is this could either break my heart or bring it back to life got a feelin' your electric touch could fill this ghost town up with life and I want you now, wanna need you forever

When emma falls in love - james’ theme song - when Emma falls apart, it's when she's alone she takes on the pain and bears it on her own cause when Emma falls in love, she's in it for keeps she won't walk away unless she knows she absolutely has to leave

I can see you - jegulus - and I could see you being my addiction you can see me as a secret mission

Castles crumbling - sirius after the prank - power went to my head and I couldn't stop ones I loved tried to help, so I ran them off and here I sit alone behind walls of regret falling down like promises that I never kept

Foolish one - rosekiller - you will say you had the best of intentions and maybe I will finally learn my lesson

Timeless - jily - I'm gonna love you when our hair is turnin' gray we'll have a cardboard box of photos of the life we've made and you'll say, "Oh my, we really were timeless"

[wjhik]

My First (Jude Bellingham) *Smut*

A/N: teethrotting 

Y/N's POV:

I am so excited for tonight. Jude is coming over to my dorm to have a movie night together. He's getting food and snacks and I'm setting up the living room. I've cleaned my dorm room, which I share with my two roommates. Over the past 2 years, the girls and I have gotten quite close, so having a night with Jude without them teasing me is quite hard. They've promised me that they will stay in their rooms. I have been giddy all day. I gathered all of the blankets and fluffy pillows I could find and placed them on my couch. I've already set up the T.V. with Jude's netflix account that we share, because I cannot be bothered to buy my own. 

Ding Dong!

Oooh he's here! He's here! He's here! I run to the front door and open the door. "Hey, baby!!" I say in a high pitched tone. I reach up and wrap my hands around Jude's neck and pull him into a hug. "I'm so excited!!" I say, pulling away from the hug. Jude is holding my waist with my hands around his neck. He kisses me lightly. "Let's go inside." He suggests. I grab his hand and drag him into my small dorm room. "Sit here. I'm going to go get the remote." I say, pushing him down on the couch. Lord knows I am not strong enough to push him down, so I know that he let me push him. 

Knock Knock

Emery opens the door, half naked, her girlfriend kissing on her. "Mhh...What is it, Y/N?" She asks me with her eyes closed. "Hey- Oh my- Can I get the remote?" I say to her, realizing what is going on. These two are always at it. She scurries into her room and chucks the remote at me, slamming the door shut. I walk back into the living room where Jude is sitting, scrolling on his phone. I pull the blanket off the back on the couch and go to sit down. Jude opens his arms for me to curl up in them as I throw the blanket over us. 

Why would Jude choose a horror movie? I'm so scared right now. All the lights are off. We're in pure darkness, apart from a few candles lit on the coffee table. The fact that it is a cold, stormy night is not helping. I'm holding on to Jude, tight as ever. I have the blanket pulled over my nose, ready to cover my eyes at a pindrop. "AAAHH!!" I scream at a jumpscare. I hide my face in Jude's chest. He giggles and puts his hand over my head, pulling me into him. "It's okay, baby. It's gone now." He says, a hint of sarcasm in his voice. 

Finally, an end to that devilish movie. "Thank god that movie is over." I say as the credits roll. It was quite a short movie, though. "Wanna catch up on some Breaking Bad?" He asks me, munching on some popcorn. "Sure." I'm not really interested, but I am pretty sleepy anyways. (I've never watched breaking bad dont judge me) 

(Smut)

Jude's POV:

Y/N looks so beautiful right now. She's half asleep. She was so adorable when she was scared. I love how she hid in my chest to 'stay safe'. I feel so safe with her. I'm glad she feels the same way. I put my hand on her chin and lift her face up. I kiss her, softly. I can't help myself around her. As I kiss her harder and harder, I can feel myself get hard. Maybe tonight is the night. I've wanted her for so long, but every time I try to escalate things, she stops me. I put my hands right above her arse. I slowly lift her on top of me. Fuck, she's grinding against me. I thought I was hard before, but now. 

Y/N's POV:

How did we get here? Just a second ago, Jude and I were cuddling and now I'm grinding against him. Jude lifts me up and lays me down on the couch. He's kissing my neck. I can feel a heat building in my legs. I grab Jude's face and kiss his lips again. He takes my shirt off. It's okay, Y/N. He's seen you like this before. Just enjoy it. You know he won't push you into something you don't want to do. I can feel my heart beating a mile a minute. 

Jude sits up on his knees and takes off his shirt. He's kissing down my body now. I'm wearing a comfy bra, I didn't expect this to happen. But he looks like he doesn't care. "You're so beautiful, baby." He says to me, kissing the top of my breast. He runs his fingers over the clasp of it and asks, "Can I?" I simply nod at him. He looks deep into my eyes. He makes me feel so safe, but so nervous at the same time. He unclasps my bra and takes it off my body. My arms immediately cover my chest. "Hey. Let me see you, beautiful." He says to me. I pull my arms away from my chest and expose myself to him. He immediately sucks on my nipple. He slowly massages my other breast. I quietly whimper to myself, too shy to be loud. Jude's hand trails down to my shorts. He rubs over my sweet spot. My hips, in reaction, buck up towards his hand, but I push them back down. 

Jude's slowly rubbing me through my shorts, and I'm moaning into his shoulder as he's kissing my neck. I can feel his hand go up and wait at the waistband of my underwear, underneath my shorts. He's looking at me for approval, and I kiss him, giving him the signal. He goes into my underwear and barely dips into my hole, collecting some of my wetness on his finger. He's rubbing my clit in circles, and I can't help but let out a moan. "Does that feel good, baby?" He asks me. He's moving so gently. I nod, aggressively, and give a quick 'Mhh'. He continues his slight movements on my clit as he whispers sweet nothings in my ears. 

Jude's POV:

I know this isn't enough for her, but what if she doesn't want more? Should I ask? Fuck it. "You want more, love?" What if I'm pushing it. She simply nods at me. What if she doesn't mean it? "Need to hear you say it, baby." I tell her. She makes me crazy. I'm so hard, but what if that's not what she wants? "Baby, I want more, but I'm scared."

Y/N's POV:

I think it's time to tell him. "I'm a virgin." Oh, no. I blew it. Why would he want to be with someone who's never done anything? I look at him for his reaction. "I want to make you feel good, but we don't have to do anything you don't want to." He tells me, kissing me lightly. "Are you sure?" I ask him. He's not supposed to like this. "I want to be your first. I love you so much. Only if you want to." He says. "I want to, Jude. I really want to. I trust you." I look into his eyes before he kisses me. He takes off his pants and gets back on top of me. 

We're interrupted by the door swinging open. A very intoxicated Alex and her annoyingly sober boyfriend stumble through the door. "Y/N!! Oh my god!! We had an amazing day!!" Alex says very loudly. She's slurring her words and her boyfriend guides her through the house. Alex looks at Jude and I's position on the couch. Jude has already covered us with a blanket, but it's obvious what we were doing. "Ooohhh!!! Emery!!" Emery comes out of her room to see me and Jude. "Please, go away..." I quietly say, hiding myself in Jude's shoulder. "C'mon, let's get you to bed. Leave them alone." Her boyfriend says. He guides her to her bedroom and tells her to leave us alone. Emery peaks out of her room and says a simple 'enjoyyy' with a smirk on her face, then shuts her door. 

"I'm so sorry about that." I say, embarrassedly. "It's okay, baby. Let's go to your room."Jude simply puts his hand out for me to take after wrapping me in a blanket. I take his hand and he walks me to my room. He lays me down on the bed and kisses me. He quickly removes the remaining of our clothes. "Ready?" He asks me. I can feel the blood rushing through my veins. "Please, be gentle." I tell him. He kisses me. He spits on his hand and strokes his semi hard dick. He puts in at my entrance and very slowly pushes in. My eyes roll to the back of my head. "That okay?" Jude asks me. "Yeah. It hurts a lot, but it feels good." I tell him honestly. He continues pushing inside me. My hands are clawing at the sheets. 

Jude's POV:

I know this'll feel good once she gets used to it. I grab her hands and lock my fingers in with her. I want to make her feel as safe as I can. I push all the way into her and wait. I know she'll need to get used to my size. Don't mean to toot my own horn, but toot toot. "Please, move." She tells me, a sense of desperation in her voice.  

Y/N's POV:

Jude's fucking me so good. I knew sex was good, but I never thought it would be this good. His head is buried into my neck as he's fucking me. "Fuck, baby. You're so fucking tight." He moans. I can feel a knot building up in my stomach. "I think I'm gonna-" He interrupts me and says, "I know, baby. Go ahead." He starts going faster and faster. When I tell him I'm coming, he moves my hands above my head and fucks me through my orgasm. He pushed into me one last time, and finishes inside me. I wouldn't want my first time to be with anyone else.

Wattpad: funkyfishfeet

DM for requests

[aivlion]

gangle and pomni friendship is so important to me, theres so much potential there. they're both miserable yet they don't seem to have fully given up.

also if they become besties... ragatha might get jealous (not specifically in a gay way but it could definitely be interpreted that way)

like... she tried so hard to be nice, and guide her, and help her... now gangle is closer to pomni than she'll ever be, even though all gangle ever does is cry and complain and bring the mood down (sorry gangle ily gangle)

dont get me wrong, i like ragatha, i think she's interesting in the fact that, like jax, she's obviously putting up a facade to cope, but how ironic that the one whose mask is always breaking (literally AND metaphorically) gets to be besties with pomni, yet when she actually tries to keep on her happy mask, it only makes pomni push her away.

i say this with nothing but love in my heart:

i think she's full of shit.

i wanna see what's under that happy facade, because once it drops, the cast can finally know her as she truly is... and she could be closer to them than ever.

maybe she knows. she knows they see through her. but she keeps it up so no one gets to know the real her. it's her own way of pushing people away, that way when when they abstract maybe she wont feel so bad.

just a thought idk

[chiiyuuvv]

Hey~

I was wondering if you'd be able to write how xiker's members would react to y/n being insecure about being very chubby/ very slim (still healthy tho) to the point where y/n would want to change herself (but because she's insecure about how others see her and not because she really want's to) and how the boy's would comfort her, what they'd do etc.

You can choose whether you'd like to do it as a headcanon, imagine or anything else!

Thank you!💚🦊

WHEN YOU THINK YOU'RE OVERWEIGHT

• PAIRING — bf!xikers x gn reader (uses some she)

• GENRE — comfort, fluff, i dont think i implied the angst, comfort, comfort, comfort

• WORD COUNT — 758

• AUTHOR'S NOTE — i am so, so, so sorry about the long wait. True was, me and my team had no idea what to write 😭 but after looking up some coping skills, we got to writing. I just wanna say that you are beautiful just the way you are, fuck other people. And if you dont believe me, xikers certainly will ♡

MASTERLIST! – JOIN THE TAGLIST!

MINJAE ☆

Minjae could see on your phone various workout methods that guarantees losing lots of weight in 2 weeks or so

Was a little confused on why you were so interested in that so he decided to comfort you

It broke his heart when you kept calling yourself fat and chubby bc what?? No you arent

And since he knew the workout methods and supplements were a scam, he suggested that you worked out with him

Praises every little thing you do with a big hug and kiss ♡

JUNMIN ☆

Junmin felt a little chubby when he was growing up so he understood how you felt

After researching, he found that setting small goals really helps your mental being

So he decided to do just that

This week, you should at least eat a apple everyday

Next week, you would go for a 30 minute walk

Does everything with you so you dont have to feel alone ♡

SUMIN ☆

He'd be all ears

Hes kinda like minjae too; his baby?? Feeling fat???

But would still let you rant everything out without him interrupting

Wipes away your tears if you start crying

And when you're done, he would go on a rant about how beautiful you are, and even though you dont feel this way right now, you will feel this way in the future ♡

JINSIK  ☆

As soon as you open up to him, hes gone

Then you hear a big crash

Throws away (stomps and slams) your bathroom scale

Along with anything else that triggers you

Then would go on a long rant about how you shouldnt compare yourself to others ♡

HYUNWOO ☆

You told him when you thought he was sleeping because it would be too hard telling him when hes awake

Immediately sits up when you fall asleep, his heart breaking as he rubs your back

And then bolts out of the bed

Spends the next 30 minutes placing sticky notes in random places for you to find, using affirmations like "youre so pretty" or "you are worth it"

And when you see it the next morning you almost break down, hyunwoo restating the note over and over ♡

JUNGHOON ☆

Junghoon feels like hes not good at using his words and would accidentally offend you

So he creates a playlist

You know those body worship songs like i love my body by hwasa or any meghan trainor song?

Hes got them all in one playlist for you to listen too

And he even sings along ♡

SEEUN ☆

Seeun knew you werent one for exercising, so why not some yunmy healthy food to eat?

He knows hes not the best at cooking but he will try

And if not he'd recruit another member

Wont force you to eat all the vegetables but once he does figure out what healthy foods you like to eat. Its over

For dessert, he would hand feed you some fresh fruits ♡

YUJUN ☆

"What, no you arent." Would be yujuns first words but he knows words dont matter actions do

So with lots of kisses, he would drag you to the bathroom

Makes up a self care plan for you to do everyday, teaching you to love your body just like how he loves you

Speaking of love, he looks at you with so much love in his eyes, you feel like melting

And if you let him, he would kiss every part of your body, and pressing extra ones in the places you feel insecure ♡

HUNTER ☆

We all know how hunter journals his emotions just when hes about to go to bed

And so he requests that you do the same

Writing down your feelings makes you feel more connected to yourself, and pinpoints how you started feeling this way

And just like yujun, if you let him, he would kiss all the places where you feel insecure

And cuddles you, whispering in your ear that you are so beautiful and you should not think of yourself that way. And even if you do, hunter would do everything in his power to change your mind ♡

YECHAN ☆

Yechan thought you were joking at first

But his smile immediately drops when he finds out that you werent

Yechan would spend the next few days talking about self acceptance. Making you talk out your feelings and acknowledge your abilities

Would give examples on how this relates to him too, like when he was younger, he thought his rap was terrible

But would reassure you that what youre feeling will not last forever, and that you will see some happier days ♡

[angelflungoutofspace]

abbott elementary season 3 ep 1 & 2 REVEIWWWWW

idk why but I thought y'all might wanna hear what I thought about the season premierrrrrr!!!! it was so good and so chaotic. so many things going on at once.

when Janine walked out and revealed as district, I HAD A HEART ATTACK. but then the context helped. im just a little confused because didn't the Manny the district guy say Janine could go back into her class 1-2 days out of the week to teach?? or was it just to go around about hearing feedback?? it was so sad to see Janine's kids not caring about her presence and the super mean substitute. But, that one little boy, Alex, made my heart just warm!!!! It just reminded Janine why she's doing what she's doing!!!

omg and Janine and Gregory?? the way Janine HAD THE CONFIDENCE to go talk to Gregory about her feelings at the beginning of the school year??? like where did that bravery come out of, and she handled the rejection so well. like honey. I would have DIED. but also.... the way Gregory just... moved on???? well, I get why. bro has to protect himself, but like come on greggy boy, don't tell me YOU DONT just feel a little of love for Janine???? but I love the way writers handled it at the end. they didn't leave the awkwardness for the season and that is something I APPRECIATE. and at least we know that Gregory and Janine still want to be friends and still miss each other platonically.

am I being paranoid for being scared of Manny the district guy???? Like my boy Jacob had a point. Manny WAS giving me some crush vibes and it doesn't help how nice and genuine he is. LIKE IM LITERALLY FALLING FOR HIM. and his mom was a teacher??? I would love to see him more, but just not as another pawn in Janine and Gregory's relationship. but, I knowwwww better. and my girl QUINTAAAA will make us wait.

I think Janine is getting really confortable and friendly with the district crew and it's kind of scary me because if she gets TOO comfortable, she won't want to leave. I think when the fellowship ends, they'll offer her a permanent spot on the team and she'll want to take it but still teach at abbott.

Barbara was so cute this episode, with her makeup. and with how honest she was to the district. as some who works at a high school and has been dealing with a particularly horrible district and administration, Barbaras words hit too close to home. but she realized that the whole district team is essentially just 4 Janines with the power and position to make things happen. and I think she's really opening up to relying on the district more.

omg my girl Melissa. honey., I was so scared every time Gary made a marriage joke. and when he proposed I HAD A HEART ATTACK AND FOR A SPLIT SECOND I THOUGHT MELISSA WAS GONNA SAY YES and the rest of the season would be wedding planning. but as embarrassing and heartbreaking as it was for Melissa, she stayed true to herself and was mature to end the relationship. and my girl just crying made me cryyyyy omg. she looks so sad even though she was the one to break up with Gary, AND I KNOWWWWWW SHE'LL STILL BE HEALING. I don't think this is the last well see of Gary since he goes to the school every Thursday, but I think it'll be the end of their relationship permanently. but now that Melissa knows fs was wants to date and knows she doesn't wanna get married, I think she's gonna be in her exploration phase. HOEEEEE PHASSEEEE. god please send Melissa a gay awakening PLEASEEEEE. she needs a rebound and no better rebound than a woman. that would be so fun and so true to her.

but yeah thats all I think so far. and it was a great epsidose and a great start to an already unpredictable season!!!

[an-angel-in-the-garden]

Doctors In Love

Okay so a little background. Today is my birthday and I love mad scientist/doctor characters so much. So I decided that I would indulge in writing about some of my favorites in many kinds of situations about my life, still no gender or descriptions but I'll note what each character deals with in case you wanna skip something. Anyways enjoy. Warnings for strong languages, blood, injuries, experimentation on reader and other people and like creepy doctor things. Also maybe spoilers for some of them

Dottore- S/O is super clumsy

Dottore at first seems like he doesn't care about how clumsy you are, as long as you aren't breaking his things it doesn't matter

However, as we know our dear doctor would not be with you if he didnt care and though he doesn't tend to show it he actually cares a lot

He found out just how bad this problem was when he saw you get cut by a spoon only to then continue to use said spoon to eat

After that he began keeping a closer eye on you and oh my sometimes he found it hard to believe you managed to come this far with such luck

Most of the time when he can't be around he has one of his segments keeping you company, dont worry they like you just as much as he does

They do a good job at steering you away from too much trouble but slip ups happen and when it does Dottore is always there to help patch you up and fix any mess

" You know if something even has a chance of causing you injury you really should just let one of the others handle it. Though I suppose this is part of your charm."

Maruki- S/O that rambles a lot

I think Maruki would be wonderful when it comes to a good debate

He listens well and always takes your thoughts into consideration when looking over his own work plus he loves getting to share his thoughts with someone just as passionate

Maruki loves getting to hear you talk about anything you like and if it happens to be something he knows about then he gets just as hyped

He tends to jump around conversations so if you can keep up with him it makes him so happy and warm

Always praising you when your studying or working on something no matter what its related to

Will spend hours in a debate with you about the difference of a villain and a vigilante and why it's important to know

" You know I love whenever you get really into a topic, it could be about anything. I just like that look of utter joy you get when we talk about it."

Mayuri- S/O has weak bones

Mayuri is a little mean about it but ultimately won't care until it causes trouble

He's about mocking about how frail your body is but should you ever get hurt he will be the one to fix you even if it means just making new bones for you

Since it doesn't affect your ability to work he still expects a lot of you but as his partner Mayuri is more forgiving if you end up making a mistake

Nemu told to keep a close eye on you whenever Mayuri is busy and if he needs her for something his squad knows to make sure you aren't hurt

It can be annoying with how often you risk breaking a bone or just having a day where walking or writing is tough but he plans to make something to fix this problem

You have so many splints and braces to use thanks to him making new ones to see what works, in a way you become a guinea pig but at least he's trying to help

" Sometimes I wonder what you would do without me. Now sit still! You're lucky I'm willing to put up with this, dont smile like that I never said I enjoyed helping you."

Urahara- S/O with a heart problem

Urahara would be the best boyfriend if you had any kind of sickness or major health problem

When it comes to your medication Urahara has a schedule to make sure you never miss the time he even starts to take breaks from work to make sure you eat with him when you need to take it

On days when an SVT causes trouble Urahara will be there to help calm it down and make sure it doesn't become any worse

Without you even asking Urahara will make you a gigi one with no problems you would have to worry about so if you want to do something but can't because of your heart he has you covered

When and if you want to get surgery he'll also be there to help as long as your safe and happy then he's also happy

Urahara will look for a great hospital to go to and have everything needed for your recovery you wont need to worry about it at all

" It's nice getting to see you so excited but please be careful, you don't want to push yourself too much. You might not need medicine anymore but we were told to not rush into doing thing for at least another month."

Szayelaporro- S/O who has a fear of medical things e.g needles

Look we should just say it outright Szayelaporro is going to be very mean about this and there is no escape from it

Not only will he mock you for being afraid but he would go out of his way to make you deal with some of these fear

Now I won't say he's totally heartless about this, if something is too much for you to handle he deals with it and if he crosses a line he will eventually apologizes

For the most part Szayelaporro will keep you away for his lab and research areas to make sure you don't have to be nervous about anything

He gets really good at hiding anything that might freak you out should he need you to come visit him and if you need blood drawn he's the only one allowed to do it

With how much he tease or just bullies you about this it can be said that he does actually want to help you overcome this fear, things like this are part of his life and he doesn't want you afraid of him

" Though it might seem scary, there is an art to things like this. The world of science is vast and ever changing. In the macabre we can still find beauty, it's why you and I ended up together after all."

All done! So I'm a day late but I had a lot of fun yesterday and ended up only writing for a few of them. I still wanted to finish it of course so here it is. Once more this is very much based on me so I know it's not something everyone will fit into but I hope you enjoyed it anyway. Thank you so much for reading and this is how I'll bring up that I’m now writing for Maruki. I played Persona 5 Royal with my family and loved it so much! Maruki became a favorite so fast. I'll be adding him to the list. Anyway thanks once more for reading this and have a lovely day/night! - Lilly

[meimeikyu]

Do you have any Bad Sanses headcanons? If so give 👀

(its completely chill if you don't by the way /gen)

I HAVE. TOO MANY. THIS WILL BE VERY LONG! STARTING WITH SOME PREFACING; A lot of these are more fanon or my versions of the bad sanses instead of just headcanons (considering i have a dislike of a large bit of their canons) (my geno ones were kinda like this too but my geno version is much more similar to canon then my bad sanses-)

So these are more just, me ranting about my versions of them which is basically me taking them and. burying them in my headcanons and story rewrites- canon doesnt have to be real if i dont look at it /j AS WELL; For this my bad sanses will be; Nightmare, Killer, Dust, Horror, and Cross. I like having cross as a part of them, and though i like bad sanses error, i consider him more his own entitiy that would work with them sometimes! ALRIGHT! LET THE RAMBLING BEGIN!!!!! (im so sorry for how long this is-)

OK SO. I could have a whole seperate rant about how i think theyd interact and work together and how they are brought together n everything so. im gonna try to keep it to my hcs directly about them n i can do a seperate thing for that if ppl r curious (this did not stay true there r interacting bits but its mostly about them solo)

Cross

ANXIETY. thats literally all i can start it with. i think this is the most anxious man to ever exist actually. also. transmasc cross is canon to me forever <3333 ANYWAYS HOLY THIS GUY. NEEDS THERAPY. well they all do but like. he need anxiety meds or something jfc someone help him TuT. I think hed dislike killing so he would mainly do supply runs, or be the distraction on missions. Hed definately fight but hed try to avoid killing at all costs. So. transmasc cross. im going back to that i have rambles. ok i think hed have like, more round bones if that makes sense?? so hed like to wear big baggy clothes n layers to try n hide it bcs he doesnt like it. I think hed have really scarred hands from fighting, but i also think hed have an x on both of them that gaster (oml i wanna punch that bitch) left on him. thinks. i wanna hug him. i think he has older brother vibes. i have like. a way i sort these ppl by age that makes no sense but i like it. but i think cross would be older. i think hes really bad at cooking. like comicly bad. he is not allowed to cook. he tall. not tallest. but tall. i think he has one really big sword, then 2 smaller hand swords. i think hed be decently powerful, basic sans magic but i think hed be good at combat from guard training and is pretty strong. i dont have as many cross thoughts as some of the others (its bcs i cant make him suffer as much /joking) i think hed like puzzles. like picture puzzles. oh he wouldnt let ppl touch his hands except for some certain ppl (the ganggg, they r family to me <mentally ill) i think his magic would be a light purple and i think he DESPISES it and avoids using it as much as possible. he keeps a tin pocket mirror on him so he can check if his eyes r purple constantly and he freaks out if it breaks (i think itd get broken on a mission sometimes). i kinda think of him n dust as opposites with this. i think cross always has to have mirrors on him and checks them constantly whereas dust despises mirrors and has definately destroyed many. uh. i love him loving chocolate n tacos. i think hed speak spanish. this is. more than i thought i had down- anyways overall i love him but some1 get him anxiety meds please- oh also i forgor to add this until later but. i think both cross and killer would have an army of plushies.

Horror

HORRORRR!!!! THE SQUISHY!!!!! i do not like his canon but fanon horror is my lovely. I CAN NVR DECIDE ON THIS BUT TRANSFEM HORROR HAS MY HEART I CAN JUST NVR DECIDE IF I WANT MY VER TO BE SO I MIGHT SWITCH PRONOUNS LIKE. 10 TIMES LMFAO. but anyways transfem horror is amazing n i love her. horror is the tallest by far. i think of horror like a polar bear i cant decribe this any other way. i think shed have big thick bones like how polar bears have lots of fur n fat to keep heat in? i think horrortales underground would be very very cold in snowdin so her magic mutated to give her thicker bones to keep warm. despite this, i think shed still be kinda cold all the time due to lack of magic post head trauma and i think shed wear big fluffy thick clothes all the time. theyd have to be custom made bcs regular clothes wouldnt fit her. i think the others would borrow them sometimes bcs. big n warm. RUBY EYE HORROR HAS MY HEART N I HAVE LOVED IT SINCE I SAW IT!! so i have a whole little thing i imagine of horror right after eye removal barely alive crawling through a cave system n finding a gem and basically ripping it out of the wall and using it as her eye. this also means she can take it out. and she does do that to terrify people- ok so basically i think she still has a small amount of magic/eye where her eye was, and the gem basically magnifys it so shes able to see? but without the gem she cant see. i also think she gets motion sick really easily bcs of this. UGH MIGRAINES. I think shed get them a lot and theyd be well. *nightmares* (hahah). i think shed have something to put pressure on the cracked skull bit without damaging it to help when it hurts. I love horror picking at her skull/dead eye socket as a stim and i add, i think shed randomly like, lightly bite herself. she would definately have like a necklace or something to chew on as well. i love like. big soft caretaker horror yknow. i think shed like to hug n like, touch the others. and COOK!! Cooking and baking horror is my fav. i think shed have someone help her read the recipes and with small bits like when you have to pour a certain amount of liquid. i dont think shed have great vision- like fine for most things but reading is not her strongsuit. I think shed also have shakey hands. i dont think shed have great mobility in general but oh boy i think shed be strong. like. could bend a metal pole strong. very strong. She doesnt use magic for like. anything because it takes a big strain on her, but i think shed have a huge heavy axe, that looks like. funnily light weight when she uses it but anyone else trys to and they cannot pick it up. I think she would pick the others up. She would put stuff very high up and have to help the others get it if the need it- I also think shed be (i cant think of the word. hyperflexible? i think double jointed is what im looking for?) basically i think shed have very bendy joints that go far in the wrong way but its not really good for her or give her an advantage its just kinda. there. if they ever run low on supplies i think shes the first to try to take smaller portions/stop eating because she puts the others before her, and i think they would very much try to stop her from doing that.

i love when horrors brother is alive so i def think her brother n au would still be alive! her or one of the other gang members would bring them supplies. i think shed visit there a lot. i dont like thinking of any of them as trapped at the castle tbh, i just dont think the others have many other places theyd want to go. i think shed have one of those like. big long pillows ppl hug. I think shed process things slower and would talk slowly but the others would be patient. i think shed be quicker with sign language bcs i imagine her have better like. skeletons dont have muscles but. muscle memory than (i dont know what to call it? active memory? i genuinely dont know what its called but like actively thinking for something memory). shed put little tabs and like. stickers everywhere with pictures to remind her what is where. i think shed listen to audiobooks or. calm music and or happy music. I also think shed like to listen to music in languages she doesnt know bcs then she doesnt have to try and process the lyrics

(i have this specific type of music i think shed like that i call light music but. i have no way to describe it. it has to do with the instrumental not having as much sounds. i think? or it. sounding more light? i literally dont know how to describe it its the vibes. Impurities - Le sserafim is an example i can think of off the top of my head for the vibes) I. think about horror a lot. as you can tell- i love her.

Dust

OH BOY HERE COMES THE ANGST!!!! Killer n dust r the ones i like to make suffer the most so expect like. a lot of angsty stuff. they also r the ones that have the most like, me adding stuff story wise- anyways. oh boy trauma! this guy is. not okay. n i love him for it. but also omg he is not. I think dust would be the most physically weak. like just entirely. I think he would have a very damaged soul due to LV + Determination. i hc he has a combination of the 2, due to his determination to escape the resets, and i also love dust being the scientist of the group and. i think he would most definately experiment on his own soul in secret. anyways i think bcs of soul issues hed be very physically weak, and would probably entirely rely on magic for fighting, as well i think hed probably use it for things outside of it bcs of soul issues. i think hed probably teleport everywhere instead of walking except for very short distances, and i think hed sit or lean on things instead of standing most of the time. But magic wise? oh fucking boy, i think hes a powerhouse. i think the way deterimation n lv would change people is different for everyone, and for him? i think it boosted his magic through the fucking roof, but also made it very unstable. i think hed pass out from overusing it too much, and would have times where theres just so so much and he has no way to get it out. i think hed constantly be slightly in that state unless like. actively fighting. part of why hed use magic for everything. also i think his main weapon for any close up combat would be 2 long pointed bones he summons. hes definately the quietest of the group, i think he wouldnt talk much and when he does his voice is very quiet and scratchy. I also think of him as one of the older ones of the group. Him n cross r the older ones whilst horror would be a bit younger and killer would be the youngest. i think horror would be physically older than them, but cross and dust would actually be much older due to resets/overwrites.

Also i dont know what dust is but its not cis. i dont know why i just cant see any of them as cis LMFAO. anyways i feel like genderfluid dust fits for my ver. primarily he/they. hed def be the scientist of the group, i think hed have a lab somewhere in the basement of the castle and hed use it for so many things. i think hed experiment with his magic a lot, but also with permission get samples of the others and test things on it, to see how they react to things. i also feel like hed have some machine he built to extract excess magic/determination from himself. i also hc hed like painting. i dont think hed paint anything in particular, probably more abstract things but i think hed use it to distract himself during a flare up. i also think hed use some of his own magic to paint at times. both his lab and the painting room would be connected, and i think they would both be a mess- i think all his spaces would be messy tbh. just. stuff. everywhere. but he could tell you where pretty much anything is in that chaos- i also think hed react differently to healing bcs of his soul. I feel like although things would heal, theyd never heal "fully". theyd almost scar, but the would have like visible unhealed magic in them. i think if he had way too much magic it could accidently reopen them since they cant fully heal. he found that out the hard way. i also think theyd 'heal' much faster though, and with enough magic/high tension he could probably force them to close. He definately does not like to sleep. he probably has nightmares most of the time when he does. he is also very much the type of person to stay up a week straigh then collapse and sleep for 18 hours. the others do not like that he does that-

i think hed probably be more. self destructive? like hed shove the others out of the way to take a hit instead. or overuse his magic during fights when emotional. i think he thinks hes somewhat invicible, due to the weird way his magic reacts to injuries. maybe hes right. who knows. i definately think he zones out all the time, and dissociates. i also think hed have a bad sense of time. hed probably be very. twitchy? he jumps if anyone touches him or gets too close, and is probably very on edge a large majority of the time. i think hed also say random facts, just out of nowhere. i think he would have at least some medical knowledge as well, from a combination of experiment with his magic to testing the limits of what it can heal. i think he might be able to force others to 'heal' the way he does with enough magic, but itd be very hard so hed only do it if one of the gang was like. actively dieing. even then hed probably remove it to let them heal normally once they could. i think thatd just. fully reopen the wound if he removes his magic. his magic is weird. i also think hed be hot. constantly. like all of the time due to his magic. (horror constantly cold x dust constantly hot :3c) as well i think his eyelights would be brighter, but i also think hed be more sensative to light. idk why i just like that. I think hed have the typical genocide sans scar. but i also love the idea of him having like. tally marks. (not a metaphor way like literally tally marks) as a way of counting resets. i think about him so much omg. despite the fact theyd probably hate each other in canon my killer n dust are close, due to the fact they both have very similar experiences. (i could probably write a whole thing on that ngl) I think dust feels somewhat responsible for killer since i like dust as like. the older one of them. so dust would get really stressed if killer is hurt. ok i think thats all for now. im so normal about him (blatant lie)

Killer

OHH BOY THE OTHER ONE I LOVE TO TRAUMATIZE!!!!!!! YAY!!!!!!!!! If i traumatize them more it means i like them. i promise. i just love making them cry :D Uh pangender killer will forever be canon and real to me. hes transmasc and pangender yknow. moving on. i think killer has very bad eyesite. i hc due to the (liquid hate? corrupted determination? either works tbh but i use liquid hate) anyways bcs of it it damaged his eyelight to the point he can barely see, he can mostly just see bright lights and blurred colors, and hed probably have no peripheral vision. i think this would have been a slow process, so when he first came to that castle, though his vision was slightly worse it was much better than now. (because of course he didnt tell anyone about it until it was very bad bcs. careless). i think he would have slowly been reworking his fighting style bcs of this. During fights, he uses a blindfold/bandages/literally anything to cover his eyes, blocking out any light he could see, because of how glowly magic is it would hinder him. i think instead hed relay on 'magic detection', not really like seeing the magic, but more just being able to physically feel where magic is around him, the more magic the more 'intense' it would feel. best way i can describe it is like sound. he cant see the magic but can feel what direction its coming from. i also think all types of magic would have a slightly different feel (so like hed be able to tell dream from cross). I think inks would be harder for him to detect since the easiest amount of magic to be able to detect would be souls, and well ink doesnt have one-. i think hed fight both close up and mid range, and use a combination of magic and physical objects. for physical objects hed mark them with small traces of magic so he can find them (and aim them). i think hed probably make a habit of running his hands over everything and leaving small magic trails to help map things. I think the others wouldnt know about the vision stuff until he ends up telling nightmare and eventually telling the others. nightmare would probably not let him do missions till killer had found a way to not endanger himself (by using his magic detection stuff) I also think his fighting would primarily involve protecting his soul over all else, since its extremely vulnerable with how it stays out. I think hed be a pretty all round, with good magic and decent direct physical fighting skills. i think hed have a very energetic fighting style, a lot of movement, both from him and him moving his opponents. i also hc hed be super flexible, and would probably know a lot of 'gymnast' tricks, and would do them during fights. this man would do an aerial in the middle of a fight no questions. i think hed dislike his sould. despite not really showing it, i think hed feel weird about the fact its always out. i also think hed feel weird about wearing colours that really clash with red bcs of it, so he usually sticks to the same outfit.

OK. BASELESS HEADCANON. so. i dont know why but for a long time ive had the hc that he has a prosthetic left arm. basically yknow in underverse 0.6 fight when he gets his arm broken? imagine that but. completely broken off. i imagine itd happen in a fight where he was already tired at that point, so when it happened the arm couldnt stay formed apart of him and just dusted instantly. i have this little idea of the prosthetic having like. these tubes that connect into his arm at the top? and it runs his magic through the prosthetic, so he can control it fully. itd definately take a while to get used to but after a while he can just use it like a regular arm. KILLER IS 100% YOUNGER SIBLING ENERGY! i hc him as the youngest of the group (despite still being an adult, i think hed be younger than the average sans.) I feel like killer would be very. emotional intense. I dont think of him as fully emotionless, i think hed be like. extremely (insert any emotion here really) then just. crash. and be empty. his hate would definately run a ton at that point. also i dont think he could cry. i think if he is he only crys hate, he doesnt have the ability to cry like the magic tears anymore. i do like him being very very energetic, but i feel like hed almost purposefully try to crash his emotions before very important missions? so he would be emotionless for them. of course, this probably would not end well- i think hed also probably be self destructive, doing 'dumb' but not really dumb things, just. reckless. they work. most of the time. but sometimes he gets stupidly injured because of it. and yet he will keep doing it. i think hed listen to like. a bunch of different types of music. pop, rock, random obscure song no one but him has ever heard of, you name it!! i feel like him n cross would like to watch like, legal and cop shows. idk why but it fits them to me. i think theyd watch it with like the audio descriptions for killer, and cross would definately pause it and describe other stuff it misses (side note, i have decent vision but OMFG I LOVE THE AUDIO DESCRIPTIONS? they r so cool fr) Killer would have no consistent fashion. the only common factor is they are either work outfit (his modifyed fighting outfit) or. for fun. in which case they are extremely over the top! no straight ppl fashion here (joking tone). Rainbow decora one day, extremely gothing the next, really anything as long as it looks cool, hed try it! he definately has a large wardrobe! oh also. my version cant summon his eyelights at all, the hate ate them :(

Nightmare

fINALLY!!!! MY EXTREMELY UNCANON NIGHTMARE!!! I LOVE HER SO MUCH!!!!! any pronoun agender nightmare is here and real!!!! i dont like.. mean nightmare.... i like family bad sanses or bsp so... niceish nightmare? also i just call her mare n mainly default to she/her so. get used to that for this LMFAO uwahh,,, so i lov eher thats all (joking) SO. i think mares corruption has somewhat of a mind of its own, but its directly linked to her. the corruption would usually be solid but if shes very upset it will start dripping, and the tentacles will always be a telling sign of her mood- i honestly dont think shed fight that much. shed mainly stay to the side and moniter, but would intervein if anybody got very hurt or if the others were getting too intense SO. HER MAGIC :3c. I associate nightmare with water. like very intensely. and dream with fire but this isnt about dream- i imagine nightmare would have 3 main types of magic; her corruption magic ofc, emotion magic, and illusion magic. the corruption magic is tentacles, the general appearance, and the *slight* modifaction ability. i think she could make herself taller or shorter, and horrifyingly, move her bones arround indivudually- i think from when the apple event first happened, her body is basically completely destroyed, so if she was ever to be 'saved' or uncorrupted, she would die before it was even done. i think she can safely uncorrupt small parts for small amounts of time, but she never really does. i love shapeshifting nightmare, but for my ver, that isnt from her corruption magic, its illusion magic, so ill get to it in a minute :3 The emotion magic has 3 states id say, influencing, changing, and directly controlling. Influencing is just that, shifting emotions slightly, either negatively or positively (i hc dream and nightmare can both do both sides of emotion magic), or influencing them slightly towards something (making them calmer, happier, sadder, ect.) Note; this wont completely change the emotion, just shifting it slightly one way. shed probably use this one subconciously, and only does it on purpose sometimes. the influencing emotions can also be affected by her own. Next is directly changing them, which is. well what it sounds like. making someone whos panicking calm. making someone whos upset feel okay. directly changing their emotion, but without controlling it if that makes sense? if she makes someone whos panicking calm, but the thing that made them panic is still there, they can panic again. VERSUS! directly controlling, which is the strongest of the 3 states. this would be making someone sad and making them stay that way, or with any other emotion. this one can be useful during raid missions, where she can force the residents of the au to be calm and ignore it while the others get supplies. this one she only really uses on those outside the gang, or in very specific situations for the gang. the direct controling emotions is also very closely tied with her illusion magic, which i now get to explain :3c

So the illusion magic has a pretty self explanitory name, but i think theres a few different ways she would use it. 1, for personal shapeshifting, basically using illusions to make herself appear different. 2, illusions on others, which in itself has 2 main ways to use. she could use it the same way she does on herserlf, making them appear and look different, or she could do whats more like 'delusion' magic or mind control. basically her physically taking over their mind, locking them in a dreamlike state, whilst she is able to influence their body. i think shes mainly use this one on enemies, and not very often as it takes a lot of power. i think shed either have to touch them to be able to active it, or thru another way ill explain in a bit:3 i think all her magic would be closly tied to water. her illusions would have a watery ripple effect when they are put in place, the mind control causes a watery swirl in both her eye and theirs, i also think all her portals would have a watery effect, and if she ever teleports, the way she sinks into either like a wall or the floor to move has a watery ripple. I ALSO LOVE NIGHTMARE N DREAM HAVING DREAM MAGIC!!! i imagine there is sort of a pocket reality called the dreamscape, where the dreams physically are, in sort of like little bubbles. they would have different swirly colours convenying the tones of the dreams, and nightmare and dream would be able to enter dreams, or influence them from the realm (though the can have a more direct influence if they enter). I think the bubbles would all float around in this sort of endless flower field, and at the center would be the tree of feelings, except its now a stump, reflecting the tree of feelings in the real world. this place is definately neutral ground, and i think dream and nightmare would talk to each other here sometimes, even just for a minute. my versions dont actually hate each other, but more think the other hates them for what happened. (communication would solve so many multiversal issues im just saying).

ANYWAYS! I think nightmare would spend a lot of time in the dreamscape, just roaming, viewing dreams. and i feel like if you went far enough it would slowly start to bleed into showing things happening in the physical world. the dreamscape would be a lot darker in thoses areas. i imagine itd start to bleed into the void, which is why it shows that. i think nightmare goes there to moniter things when she doesnt want to be present physically. i think they could also take other people to the dream realm if they choose. I think itd be less of a physical realm though. I think dream and nightmare can enter it fully, physical bodies and all but if anyone else is brought their body stays in the regular world. oh i also imagine nightmare have water ripples around her feet when she walks. no matter if theres no water there, it just always happens. i imagine nightmare with burn scars on half of her bones (same side as the covered eye), bcs i love the idea of the villagers trying to burn her at the stake. i think nightmares bones look smooth and shiny mostly, but if you touch them you can feel the thousands of cracks and breaks and burns n ect. i also think shed feel cold to touch. also the goop would taste like rotten sour apples. i just like that idea.

i think shes able to touch people, but she has more influence if she does, so she trys to be careful when doing it. with that being said, i think shes touch starved!!!!! n i feel like her tentacles would constantly go towards wrapping themselves around the gang. i think she wears a crown, but its a new one she made herself. though she still has her original, hidden away. i LOVE the idea of nightmare having a shit tone of hobbies shes amazing at from having hundreds of years to learn things. ive nvr seen anyone else suggest this one but i hc shed make jewlerly. rings necklances brooches pins, her own crown, ect. i feel like shed make something special for each of the gang members. ALSO!! HERES WHERE THE OTHER MIND CONTROL METHOD COMES IN!!!! i hc nightmare would be very good at singing. but. siren style. i think she really enjoys singing, but usually only gets to do it in private or in the dreamscape, otherwise she risks controlling someone with it. however, i think the gang has little sound blockers shes given them, in case she ever need to use it on a mission. in addition, i think shed enjoy dancing, and can do it more because it has no risks. i think she definately knows a bunch of ancient styles lost to time. i also love the idea of her having a bunch things collected from over the years, tons of paintings, artworks, collectibles, so many things. i think a lot of them would be spread around the castle, but some special ones would be hidden in a small room only she had access to. i also think shed play a ton of instruments, but espcially violin! ALSO! BOOKS!! oml. books. she has. too many. i imagine her having a huge library. like im talking spanning multiple floors of the castle giant library. there is at least 2 secret book doors in it im sure. shed definately meticulously sort it. i think shed be very very organized. also. i bet she speaks like. 12 languages. 6 of which are completely outdated. also she wears a dress. i dont make the rules (i do, this is my version, i make them all. and she wears a dress-) i imagine itd be a very dark black, but like, basically floor length and very. regal looking. i think itd be slightly ripped up at the bottom as well. it would be very fancy. not pratical, but fancy. she doesnt do much fighting, it doesnt need to be practical- i think shed be very. other worldy- like, seem almost (for lack of a better word, delusional) to regular people. in reality she just. knows a lot but does not know how to properly convey herself in a way that seems normal, and she doesnt really care to either. also i think shed be up to date with modern tech, because nothing is funnier to me than the idea of nightmare texting the gang missions and ending it with a kaomoji (this is canon to my version because its so fucking funny to me-)

ok theres. theres probably more let me be honest but ive been writing for. like 3 hours. and this is already way more than i planned! but tysm, this was super fun to do!!! and now i finally have a shit ton of these written out!!!!! i need to. draw them sometime bcs of my design modifications. but anyways. if you actually read all of this i am. so impressed- TYSM AGAIN FOR THE ASK!!!! I LOVE THESE HC ASKS AND WILL GLADLY DO MORE :3c

[kunikame]

Natsume!! hello! i see rqs r open.....kindly asking if u don't mind..... ahem,,, small hcs of leo comforting fem!s/o that came home and break down in front of him bcz of toxic work place? i need comfort after angsty day ToT, take yer time n don't forget to rest!

-🐝

hi hi bee nonnie welcome to the squad!!! ofc ofc! im so sorry it took so long to get this out i kept rewriting it cuz i never liked how it came out. still kinda dont but my beta readers said its good so im gonna trust them :,) hope you like it ! thank you & have a great day <3

[ natsume & izumi ver. ]

comfort crowd - t. leo

warnings : "angel" used once (1 time)

w/c : 862

today was a horrible day, you decided. it started when you realized you forgot your house keys, then when your only friend at work didn't show up, making the place 10 times more unbearable than it was with her around.

next thing you know everyone was approaching you with demands you couldn't possibly meet in your work hours, so they asked you to stay later. your superior started yelling at you for missing a report you were sure you weren't even asked to write, but no one would listen to you trying to defend yourself.

by the time you were finished, it was way past your usual clock out time and your lock screen was filled with messages from leo asking where you were.

heaving a deep sigh and looking around the office you realized you were the last one there. you stood up, tired bones aching, and stretched hoping to relieve at least some of the pain. spoiler alert: didn't help.

you walked out of the building, your mind exhaustedly pulling your body along with you, the only thing keeping you going was the thought of laying in bed.

then it started raining, because of course it did

this time you groaned, of course this happens when you dont have an umbrellla, or your keys. putting in the effort to sluggishly walk home faster, your feet carried you on autopilot as your mind was far, far away. what was leo doing right now? you only hope he didn't burn the apartment down. wait- apartment.... you'll have to walk up all those stairs.. oh wait, nevermind, there's an elevator. thank god.

next thing you know you were standing in said elevator ascending to your apartments floor. the doors opened facing a long hallway. you got out and slowly walked towards the door decorated with an orange bell leo insisted on hanging. you knocked and the door opened immediately, the bell letting out a pleasant chime.

"where've you been i was worried sick you weren't even answering your messages and-"

you walked past him. no matter how it stabbed you in the heart to do so, you were too tired to listen to his yelling right now.

the ginger stood in the doorway dumbfounded, then slowly turned to see you walking towards the bedroom. gently closing the door and locking it, he followed you.

"what's wrong?" he asked, quieter this time.

you sighed, "work. it was horrible," though you told yourself you wouldn't cry, the slight tremble in your voice betrayed you.

"wanna talk about it? i'll run you a warm bath."

the stabbing in your heart got more intense. now you felt even worse for walking past him. wordlessly nodding knowing your voice would betray you if you spoke, leo stood watching you for a moment then left for the bathroom.

a few moments later you followed after him. the sweet aroma of the floral scented bath bubbles you bought a month ago surrounded you and suddenly your headache wasn't as bad as it was just a moment ago. your boyfriend looked at you and grinned, telling you to get in while he fetched a towel. you did just that.

the water was just the right temparature and you felt your stiff muscles relaxing. heaving a sigh, you leaned your head against the edge of the tub and closed your eyes. maybe this is what your mind was craving instead of just sleeping your problems away.

leo came back with the softest towel you owned and sat next to the tub. he looked at you for a moment, your posture more relaxed and your eyebrows no longer scrunched up.

"so, what happened?"

you went on a rant, telling him about your troubles throughout the day. you don't remember when exactly he moved over to start massaging your shoulders and scalp but you wouldn't dare complain. it felt so so nice.

his fingers kept moving through your hair, not stopping even when you were done ranting. he knew how much you needed this. just like how you did everything in your power to ensure he never overworked himself and kept his shine, he had to do the same. he loved you wholeheartedly, with his entire being and more, seeing you so down felt like a knife stab right in his heart.

"i'm sorry you had to go through all that today angel. is anzu off sick or was she just not in today?" you shrugged.

"well, no matter. we could always find you a different job. and before you complain, this space is clearly not good for you. you're always exhausted and they demand too much of you. i say you should quit. i could ask sena if he knows about anything. or arashi maybe.. tsukasa?" he moved to sit in front of you and held your hand close to his heart, "i'll ask anyone and everone. i'll do anything, no matter what it takes. it's my job to save you, i am your knight after all," and he showed a grin so bright it could rival the sun.

but, then again, there is no rival for him when he is your sun.

ੈ✩₊˚TAGLIST : @hugs4shizu @mikctp @meiquipo @ibaraluvr @venusflwers @tokusaatsus // ask/comment to be added/removed! (if you’re in bold i can’t tag you)

[lovebvni]

the people have spoken — here’s my lore <3

hellooo!! <3 you guys said you wanted to see my lore from my main dr that i actually got from js thinking about my dr!!!

for context, this is for my main mha dr <3 i am siblings w himiko toga but she also has 2 more siblings including me, kuro (kurtis is his american name; he is also himiko a twin sibling) and himari (halo) (i just changed her name as of typing this)

i js realized how y/n this sounds but ykw it’s cool shit ok?

tw for assault (or battery idk im not a lawyer), cutting of skin, drug use of minors, getting drugged .

please stop reading if there is anything that is a trigger to you. and also know this is all FICTIONAL in this reality so please do not worry abt anyone lmfao 😭😭

im going to be as brief as possible! i dont wanna type long blog although this is interesting <3

soooo our family moved back from america when i was in ~5th grade. i was like what… 10 because i started school early (i started developing fast oopsie‼️), himiko n kurt were 14/15 idk man i can’t do math their birthday is after mine 😭 but we were all still young. halo was 6/7ish

so around the time we moved back to japan and himiko real REALLY didn’t wanna go back to japan. she had friends in the us who she felt like accepted her n whatnot, she has a girlfriend she had to break up with because of the move, etc. there was lot going on in her head — it wa as big change to move back to japan so our mom could thrive in her business.

so, himiko came up with a plan — to drug her family, run away and fly back to america to continue living her life.

now, obviously, she didn’t complete the whole thing because she felt bad. she would be without her twin and two younger siblings.

she drugged all of us at a family celebration dinner. i don’t know the details for this i didn’t think it through/didn’t get told what she used. it started with an a though, idk LMDAO 😭😭

anya ways she drugged us at this family dinner then decided, as a way to show her love, she was going to take some of all our blood and cut a heart out on a various part of all our bodies.

my mom got a heart on her outer right thigh, my dads was on his right shoulder blade, kuro’s on his left arm, mine on my left eye and kiara’s on her left hand.

i don’t quite know why she did this but obviously, right for her parents, left for her siblings. idk if it means anything to her but yeah!

anyways hospitalized stitched, blah blah medical recoveries whatever.

now with this next part i’ll be kind of brief. some of kurt’s school friends found out abt the incident and they were like “hey we got set that could help u” but he decided to bring me since i was his next closest sibling — whatever.

they were older or something so they had like drugs (😧😧😧😦😦) ( i can’t take this seriously it’s insane) anyways we went to a lot of parties like every friday n saturday night but on saturdays we wouldn’t get as high bc we have church on sundays (we watch the american one online 💀)

it was crazy tho bro!!! but anyways both kurt n i have nic addictions 🤷🏽‍♀️🤷🏽‍♀️🤷🏽‍♀️ woopsie poopsie!

i didn’t script all of this btw. i just scripted the part abt himiko drugging us then fucking dipping. all this other shit was included.

also dw i won’t get cancer or anything serious from using anything 😭😭 js temp shit!

anyways yeah! sorry it’s shorter than u expected. i have a weird headache that keeps coming n going (along w migraines) so i tried to keep it short so i wouldn’t stress myself

anyways!!! i hope yall enjoyed! if u have my questions feel free to ask or smth idk 😭