#i felt like that was very relatable

[caffeinatedopossum]

I'm watching mob pyscho 100 and it actually makes sense now. I tried to watch it once when I was younger and couldn't understand anything that was going on but now I'm like "oooh we're autistic" lmao. So THAT'S why I didn't know what was going on

[bunnieswithknives]

I feel bad for neglecting Hazel so much, I do have many thoughts about her.. and also a mermaid au that im probably not going to do anything with

[greenglowinspooks]

(DCxDP) Drowning in formaldehyde (Pt. 1)

—

Tw: one instance of canon-typical violence (DC), vivisection mention

Will be crossposted to AO3 eventually

(Prologue) - (Pt. 2)

(Subscription post/masterlist)

—

Danny has been working for Mr. Cobblepot for over a month now.

The first few weeks he was in the Penguin’s company, he couldn’t do much of anything. Instead, Mr. Cobblepot made sure that he was well-rested and beginning to recover.

Danny cried a lot in the first week that he was there.

He cried when he ate for the first time in years; the GiW had kept him on IVs and a feeding tube, so they wouldn’t have to move him from his surgical table.

He cried when he was given his own room to stay in, when he was brought clothes to wear, when he was given a bodyguard to protect him.

He cried when Mr. Cobblepot’s doctors told him that the damage to his vocal chords was likely permanent, and that he would never sound the same again. That he would find it hard to speak at any volume above a whisper.

Apparently, he had a lot more damage to him than he had thought.

The doctors said that the scarring in his brain stem suggested his entire brain had been removed and had regrown. Danny couldn’t really disprove that, and it did line up with a pretty substantial gap in his memory, but if that was the case then why couldn’t his voice recover too?

The scarring and incredibly new tissue that showed up in scans of several other parts of his body suggested that the GiW had done the same thing with most of his organs, as well as a few limbs, and all of the fingers on his right hand.

Danny could remember that. He just didn’t want to.

Perhaps it was the feeling of pity that kept Mr. Cobblepot so understanding of Danny’s slow recovery. That didn’t really matter much, though; Danny’s energy was focused on keeping his place here, ensuring that Mr. Cobblepot didn’t decide he was no longer worth the effort.

As it turned out, there was an easy enough solution to that.

Danny was the only one who knew how to properly operate and modify the weapons and inventions stolen from the GiW.

And so, Danny had a niche he could occupy. He could be useful, useful enough that Mr. Cobblepot couldn’t get rid of him, even if he wanted to.

And, as it turns out, Danny remembered quite a lot of the theories he heard while he was on the cutting board.

As soon as he had enough muscle control of his arms to do so, he was working away at the machinery created by the GiW and his parents.

No, not his parents.

Doctors Madeleine and Jack Fenton.

Regardless of their creators, he was able to understand them quite intimately.

Maybe it was because the ectoplasm flowing through the weaponry was his own, maybe it was because he had nothing to listen to for three years other than the excited chatter of his vivisectionists as they cut him open. Maybe it was because they were both simple weaponry without a purpose.

Danny found working on the machines soothing in a way that nothing else was.

The smell of oil and grease, the sounds of mechanical clanking and metal joints squealing, the feeling of cold steel beneath his fingertips.

The first thing he did to the machines was replacing the paint, from shiny white to a matte black. That way, they were recognizable as his own modified creations.

It was only a bonus that he didn’t catch his reflection in the metal surfaces this way.

Still, his reflection was starting to become more familiar to him. It was still strangely off-putting to see, but his face was beginning to plump out from consistent eating, and his skin was beginning to lose its unhealthy pale tone, going back to a more natural pinkish color.

His eyes still looked devoid of life, but that could be ignored as long as he didn’t look at himself for too long.

Danny sighed, leaning back in his chair as he wiped his forehead with the back of his hand. He was working on modifying the ectoblasters so that they could properly hit humans, as per Mr. Cobblepot’s orders.

He probably should feel some sort of moral conflict over it, but really, Danny couldn’t find it in him to care. Maybe it was some sort of deep internal flaw, or maybe it was because he knew that they wouldn’t be shot at anyone without blood on their hands. Either way, he didn’t have any qualms with what he was doing.

As Danny reconnected the circuitry within the gun, the indicator lights on the side of the muzzle blinked to life, a familiar neon green.

Danny would have to change that color too, he thought. Maybe red would be nice instead, or an icy blue?

He was pulled from his thoughts by the door to his temporary workshop opening. Danny looked up, and smiled when he saw that his bodyguard was the one standing in the doorway.

The man, known only as Derringer, was 6’2”, built like a tank, and known for his love of unusual firearms. He was also a big fan of card games, and had been teaching Danny how to play Blackjack during their meals.

He gently closed the door behind him, strolling into the workshop.

Danny hopped out of his seat, hugging the man tightly. Derringer laughed, patting Danny on the back as he clung to him like a koala.

“Good to see you too, kid,” the man said, his deep voice rumbling in his chest, “you just about done in here?”

Danny nodded, letting go of the bodyguard. He picked up the gun on the desk, handing it to Derringer, and pointed to the target resting in the far corner of the room.

Derringer glanced down at Danny, shrugging before aiming the gun.

He pulled the trigger, and a large scorch mark appeared in the center of the target.

Derringer whistled appreciatively, walking over to inspect the damage.

There was a deep dent in the center of the metal target, around an inch in diameter, and a large scorch mark surrounding it. The metal of the dent was white-hot, and the area around it was somewhat warped.

“That’s real nice, kid,” Derringer said, “don’t know how you do it.”

Danny grinned, baring his teeth at the man. He smiled back, ruffling his hair.

“The boss is gonna go forward with the Arkham raid soon, so long as your guns are ready,” he said, “he’s eager to try them out for real. You think you’re up to talking to him?”

“Yes,” Danny signed, nodding to the man.

“Good,” Derringer signed back.

Mr. Cobblepot, not wanting Danny to be limited in his speech by the damage to his vocal chords, had ensured that all of the people who interacted with him knew at least the basics of ASL.

When he wasn’t working on the ectoblasters, Danny was practicing his ASL with a dedicated tutor, or with Derringer, who learned the language when his mother had gone deaf.

“Can I eat first?” Danny signed, “I forgot to.”

“You forgot, or you didn’t want to leave your work?” Derringer asked, signing as he spoke, the corners of his eyes crinkled with amusement, “and yeah, the boss wants to talk to you in thirty minutes. You’ve got plenty of time before then.”

“Thank you,” Danny signed, “let’s go.”

“Hey, just a sec,” Derringer said. His face had dropped into something unusually serious.

Danny nodded, tilting his head as he signed a quick “what’s wrong?”

“You’re a good kid. Even after what you’ve been through, you’re…you’re a really sweet kid,” Derringer said, looking away. “But you…you can’t keep being sweet to everyone. You gotta act tough, alright?”

“Why?”

“You just…” Derringer sighed, combing a hand through his thick, curly hair, “a lot of the guys think that you’re too weak to be here. They’re calling you the Penguin’s pet project, and the problem is that they’re not really wrong. You gotta be scarier to survive, alright? Gotham’ll eat you alive if you don’t. Just make up a persona and roll with it.”

Danny nodded slowly, processing his words for a moment.

“Like a mask?”

Derringer laughed, a bittersweet smile on his face.

“Yeah, like a mask. Just don’t start fighting crime while you’re at it.”

“Okay,” Danny signed, his movements slow. “I can do that.”

“Good on you, kid,” Derringer said, ruffling his hair once more, “now let’s go get lunch.”

The two of them ate quickly, Danny’s mind on Derringer’s advice the entire time.

He was right, and Danny knew it. He’d seen the way that some of Mr. Cobblepot’s men had looked at him.

He wasn’t anywhere near big enough to pull off the looming intimidating look that Derringer did; his doctors back in Amity had told him that he would grow to be over six foot, but his time in the GiW seemed to have stunted his growth significantly. He was only around 5’6”, and it seemed that he was going to stay that way.

In the same way, he wasn’t nearly frightening looking enough to pull off the terrifying stares of the smaller individuals working under Mr. Cobblepot. He just couldn’t get the glare right; his face would always fall back to a blank, dead stare.

Though, maybe if he played into that…

A few minutes before they had to leave, Danny excused himself to go to the restroom. He stared into the mirror, looking into his cold, dead eyes, and let his face drop.

When he adjusted his stance, and kept his eyes a bit wider than usual, he looked downright unnerving.

Danny had already noticed that most of his mannerisms were…unusual, after his stay at the GiW base. Put simply, he had forgotten what it was like to be a human.

He had noticed that most of the people around him would avoid being in his presence, and had begun mirroring their body language as much as he could to seem more normal.

Maybe, though, it would be better for him not to.

He could lean into the whole thing. An unstable young adult, experimented on by the government for years.

Danny looked into the mirror, and wide, icy eyes stared back at him.

Danny left the restroom. Derringer turned to greet him, jolting when he did. After a moment, he nodded.

“That what we’re going with?”

“Yes. Is it good?”

“Yeah. Freaky. Gonna take some getting used to, but yeah. Now,” he said, getting up from his spot at the break room table, “let’s go see the boss.”

Danny felt anxiety bubbling up in his chest, his entire body beginning to twitch. If Mr. Cobblepot didn’t approve of the weaponry, or if he thought they were underwhelming, would he be thrown out? Would he be tortured again, or killed?

Danny shivered when they came to a stop in front of the door to Mr. Cobblepot’s office. Failure wasn’t an option. He had to make sure this went well.

“You’ll do great, kid,” Derringer whispered, pushing the door open.

Mr. Cobblepot had been talking with a few other people, but their conversation died out when Danny and Derringer entered the room. Danny’s skin crawled.

“Ah, Danny! Just the person I wanted to see,” Mr. Cobblepot said, a large smile on his face, “Do you have one of your guns with you?”

“Yes,” Danny signed, nodding.

“Wonderful. I was just telling my associates here about your work. Do you mind giving a demonstration?”

“Where should I shoot? Do you have a target?”

Derringer was quick to translate. Mr. Cobblepot nodded, gesturing for a hired hand in the corner of the room to pull out a small wooden board, holding it up in the air.

Danny paled. He would definitely burn the man’s hands if he hit the target, even if he aimed for the furthest corner of the board.

Still, he was more terrified of disappointing Mr. Cobblepot than he was empathetic towards the man, so he drew a blaster from the holster on his leg and aimed carefully.

The blast hit the center of the board. The man holding it howled in pain, dropping the target and drawing his hand close to his chest. The nauseating smell of burning flesh filled the room.

Danny breathed shakily, in and out.

Mr. Cobblepot, for what it was worth, looked like he couldn’t possibly be happier. He and the others inspected the board on the ground closely, ignoring the hired hand as he ran out of the room, still cradling his damaged hand.

A large hole had been blown into the board, and a good portion of it had been incinerated.

“Look at that, ladies and gentlemen! I told you that Danny would deliver, and deliver he did! Imagine if that had been a person instead! Danny, what would you say would happen?”

Danny paused, trying to wince when he realized that the question wasn’t hypothetical, and Mr. Cobblepot actually wanted an answer.

“It would give them S-E-V-E-R-E burns,” Danny finger spelled the word that he didn’t know the proper sign for, “mostly S-U-R-F-A-C-E. It can’t P-E-I-R-C-E, because there is no bullet, just energy.”

Derringer translated for him.

Mr. Cobblepot frowned, and Danny frantically continued, “but it can be L-E-T-H-A-L! Burns on the head kill fast. Burns on the body make S-H-O-C-K, and kill. Strong I-M-P-A-C-T, too.”

“So they do still kill, just not instantly?”

“Yes,” Danny signed, “they’re fast. They hurt bad. Bad way to die, hurts a lot.”

“Well,” one of the other men in the room piped up, “I guess he’s not completely hopeless.”

“Of course he isn’t,” Mr. Cobblepot replied, fixing a terrifying glare onto the man, “it was my idea to bring him in, after all.”

“Danny,” Mr. Cobblepot said, turning his attention back to him, “we’re going to be collaborating with these fine individuals in the future. I’m going to need twenty guns ready for use in a week. You can handle that, can’t you?”

Danny nodded frantically.

“What kind?”

“Doesn’t matter,” Mr. Cobblepot said, waving his hand dismissively, “semi-automatic is preferable, but handguns and shotguns also work. Just make sure they work perfectly.”

The room was silent for a moment.

“Well, that’s all. You can leave now, and I’ll finish discussing the details with my associates.”

Danny nodded, signing him a quick “thank you, goodbye,” and slipped out of the room alongside Derringer.

They made their way back to Danny’s workshop in silence. Once they were inside, Derringer heaved a heavy sigh, running his fingers through his hair.

“You really think you can make that many guns that quickly, kid?”

“Yes,” Danny replied, “but I need your help.”

Derringer groaned, a smile on his face.

“Of course you’re putting me to work. I should’ve expected it. Now, what do you need me to do?”

“Well, first, hold this…”

—

[lunarharp]

What led to this (orufrey comic, cw an uncomfortable/creepy scene)

[lully-jo]

I wonder how many people really love and relate to Alisaie because they too were the girl who struggled to understand how folks around her could act like suffering and selfishness and hivemind behavior was normal and their softness was called a weakness and so they built up an abrasive exterior to force people to take them seriously and now they don't know how to be vulnerable without feeling embarrassed or cringe even though they still feel things so deeply it's almost suffocating...

[tuliptic]

So Much I Miss You

I miss you, even when you have not entered my life, I still miss you.

Guess what? We’re doing Mamamoo’s song this time. This is one of my faves from them and I feel like it would be great to do a reading based on it. I mean… I have not done PACs for quite a long time and am finally back a bit! Will proceed to do the rest but am suddenly in the mood to do a love reading so uhhh… Yeah…

Anyways, we all know the drill. Close your eyes, meditate on this topic and ask yourself the question: “Who is this potential romantic partner that has not entered into your life?” Breathe in and out, make sure your mind and heart is calm. Then, open your eyes to see which pile talks to you the most/draws you in the most. Once you’ve found your pile, scroll down to the respective parts to see what are the messages for you.

Pile 1    -     Pile 2

Pile 3    -     Pile 4

Disclaimer: This is solely for my entertainment purposes. Take only whatever that you feel like it. If it doesn’t resonate, it’s okay to just drop it. That aside, I do not consent to my work or here to be used by third parties on this platform or other websites.

Decks used: Luna Cat Tarot Deck (Major Arcana), Kawaii Tarot Deck, Sweet Dreams Oracle Deck, Starcodes Astro Oracle Deck, self made lyrics deck.

Pile 1:

Card of querent: The Chariot

I feel that you’re the type of person who’d be on your toes, knowing where you want to go and how you want to achieve. Constantly moving, constantly pushing yourself to grow. It feels like you’ve been letting the waves bring you along because you were tired or lost. But now you’re on land and you feel like you’re in your element, and now you’re riding the Chariot and redirecting your life to where you want to go, which kinda explains why you can be slightly gungho and excited, sometimes others may even view you as aggressive.

1. What type of relationship will we have? - Nine of Cups

I would say that the relationship is very fulfilling, something like a dream come true. I wouldn’t paint it in a fantasy, love story, happily forever kinda way tho. It’s like… There’s some sort of relief, that you finally met the other person and the other person finally has you in their arms. This person is someone who you’d consider having a marriage with, where you want to be together with them. The emotional fulfilment is very strong and there’s some sort of pampering with each other there.

2. How will I meet them? - The Fool rx

I feel that you will meet them when you’re not really ready for a romantic relationship. You’ll be focused on doing other things and have no time for love, but they’ll just appear there and for some reason, I feel that you may even want to push them away. There may be a conflict between your heart and mind, where your heart doesn’t want to fall for this person, but your brain is telling you that this is a suitable person to have a relationship with. There’s an oracle card here, Love, for you, allowing your heart to open to love as it manifests into the world.

3. What type of person are they? - The Magician rx

This person… I feel like there’s a lot in their head and they don’t really verbally express their thoughts. They may find it… Embarrassing? Like… They want to be pampered but they don’t think they deserve to ask but still they have that thought and the cycle goes on. Self-doubt and cloudiness in their mind as well. Tho I do not doubt the passion they have for you and the relationship you both share. They probably have some Fifth House placement as well.

4. How will I feel about them? - Five of Cups

I feel like… There’s gonna be some not so happy emotions here. It feels like your person will be coming at a time when you’re not feeling like yourself, and you’re not able to really… Enjoy and let yourself be free to accept your person. It’s like you want this person, but whatever situation you’re in is not helping you and you’re burdened with a lot of things, to the point that romantic love is at the back of your head. I think you might even have put interpersonal relationships aside to deal with whatever that’s happening to you. You know you have manifested them into your life and as much as you wanna appreciate them, you were unable to do so full-heartedly.

5. How will they feel about me? - Ten of Wands

Somehow I feel that they may feel tired. It’s like… They’ve tried to be by your side but things don’t seem like they’re working out. They might even feel like they’ve been taken advantage of. Tho I’m seeing this as temporary. Cuz feeling about it is one thing and understanding it is different. They understand that you’re going through hard times and they are determined to walk through this path with you. They may feel upset and all but they kinda put responsibility as their priority. 

But also, one thing I’m seeing is that they know that this is a period of transition and both of you are moving from the old to the new. Which is why they stand strong and stay in this relationship.

6. Our future together, what will they want from the relationship, etc. - Knight of Cups, Three of Cups, Nine of Pentacles

I’m seeing that they would want to build a future together, want the both of you to grow together, in wealth and in emotional fulfilment. I’m somehow picking up that either one of you, or maybe the both of you have been through not so nice childhood, which makes you crave for the emotional fulfilment, for the fairytale romance that’s always shown in the movies. It may sound too naive but I’m seeing that both of you will work towards that goal, wanting the love you both share to be as magical as it seems. And to achieve that, one will need a certain level of financial independence as well as abundance. You two fill in the missing pieces within each other and complete them, contributing equally in this relationship.

The relationship may start with some sort of mystery, but as you grow together, you explore the various aspects of a romantic relationship, finding which love language the other person responds to. I’m seeing that both of you will set some sort of goals and maybe visioning how the relationship will flourish. Love is an open door, and you can just step into the happiness that you’re meant to receive. They would want to wear happiness on your face and show you off to the whole world.

Overall energy: The Star, Page of Cups rx

I have to say something. Tho the cards may not look… good, I feel that the overall vibe and energy for the reading isn’t bad. Like… It shows the ups and downs of the relationship, and not everything has a fairytale ending. I feel that this is the combination of The Star and Page of Cups rx, where the reality is painted here. You two will need to work with your dreams and spirit’s energy to reach your highest good, and to know what’s the best for you. There’s a lot of transits I’m seeing, where you two progress and learn, tho there are times that y’all are content with where you are right now.

A reminder: this reading is not for your future spouse, but for a potential romantic partner who’s gonna enter into your life. So it’s perfectly alright if you do not resonate with this reading.

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Pile 2:

Card of querent: The Tower rx

First thought I’m getting is that you’ve been through A Lot. Each of us have been through a bunch of ups and downs in life, but what you’ve gone through is much more… Heavier than the rest. There’s a certain sadness, coldness, helplessness that you’ve experienced, which have affected your life in ways that you can’t explain. I’m seeing a lot of hysterical screaming and crying as well. This card being here is like… A message. A message to you that it’s not your fault that things have happened, that things have to be broken down only then it can be rebuilt.

1. What type of relationship will we have? - Ten of Swords rx

I’m seeing that this relationship that you guys will be sharing is something… Healing. I see this healing will be more towards a mental and emotional healing instead of a spiritual one. It feels like all the knives that are sticking at your back (you prolly may have been backstabbed by people you’ve trusted, and for some reasons I’m thinking it’s friends rather than lovers) are being pulled out, the wounds cleaned and treated. This relationship will give you the time, space and energy to heal, where they create and introduce peace, prosperity and joy in your life.

2. How will I meet them? - The Empress rx

I feel that you’ll meet them when you’re not feeling yourself. You have a lot of things going on in your life, and for some reason you’ll not see them as a potential romantic partner. It probably may be due to the betrayals you’ve just experienced and hence, losing faith in most things. Most, not all. Which made you put a distance between them and you. I have a feeling that you’ll also focus more on yourself and stop being self-sacrificial during those times, keeping things to yourself. A very introverted energy compared to how you usually are.

3. What type of person are they? - Eight of Swords rx

They prolly will be your type of person lol. They find solutions to problems and they give me the feeling that they’re capable of guiding you through your problems. You not only find a lover in them, but also a friend, a guide, someone who walks beside you and is ready to help you. I see that they’re also someone who will help you out from all and everything that’s restricting you, especially your past beliefs that have been pushed onto you ever since your childhood. They’re open minded, but not freely open kinda thing? They’re willing to try certain things up to a certain level, but still will opt for the safer option or something that they’re more used to. Like… Taking calculated risk but only for a period that they deem safe. Kinda thing. Comfort is a thing for them. Weirdly I’m feeling Taurus vibes lol.

4. How will I feel about them? - Queen of Wands

You will be attracted by their confidence and courage, a soft and graceful maturity that comes from it. I somehow see a soft glow that’s warm, like the dawn instead of an afternoon bright gaze kinda thing. I see that you may be an introvert and they would probably be slightly extroverted than you. Just… Slightly. Lol. But they are capable of socialising. Very good interpersonal skills, observant and can capture your thoughts easily. It feels like they’re someone who you want to be? With those skills and charisma. It’s like they’re a dream that you wanna achieve, and you find inspiration from them and thrive to improve yourself better. 

5. How will they feel about me? - Knight of Swords rx

I’m seeing that they are observant of you and are able to zoom in to the quiet power you hold, being firm with whatever beliefs you hold. Not to go uhhhh NSFW but I feel like they may feel morally challenged with you at times? They may be interested in some risque acts in places that don’t seem to be appropriate. They wanna try a lot of things with you, but will not push it when you say no. I’m also seeing some dominance here? They may also wanna feel that rush of adrenaline in the sense of “conquering” you. I hope I’m making sense with my words here.

6. Our future together, what will they want from the relationship, etc. - Knight of Wands, Four of Wands rx

They’ll want to go on adventures with you, grow with you and experience a lot of new and old things together. I’m seeing some travelling through memory lane kinda thing? Where you two constantly revisit certain comfort memories. You two may go on spontaneous trips together when you two are feeling like it, and you two complement each other’s energies well, working with one another’s dreams to reach the highest good of you two. Sometimes, you two may have some differing opinions, but you guys are able to look at things from different perspectives, from outside the box, and figure out how to solve the problems together. Tho not gonna lie, you two may have some over-spending from all those spontaneous trips, and will learn the lessons together. Whatever difficulties you two experience will make you two grow stronger, connecting your dreams to the next. Whatever tears you have right now will teach you the importance and preciousness of happiness, making you find the reason to live and love.

Overall energy:The Emperor, Six of Wands

The Emperor here gives me the “conquering” kinda feeling. It’s giving me the vibe that this person isn’t as harmless as they appear to be. But they’re proud of you, and you’re proud of them as well. There’s also some form of glow up from this relationship as well, where you improve yourself so that you can stand on equal grounds with the other person, but they’re also doing the same for you. I’m also seeing a lot of attraction and there’s some sort of fulfilment that you two find in each other. It’s like,,, you two are meant to be, that it’s natural that you two end up together, like it’s common sense. For some reason I’m also seeing love letters? So maybe one of you may have words of affirmation as your top love language.

A reminder: this reading is not for your future spouse, but for a potential romantic partner who’s gonna enter into your life. So it’s perfectly alright if you do not resonate with this reading.

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Pile 3:

Card of querent: The Devil

First thought I’m getting here is Lilith in 1H kinda vibe. You know who you are, and there’s some devilish charm that you put to great use. Badass, sexy, sultry, seducing vibes. You pay close attention to your heart and mind, not allowing fear to distract you (cues Lesserafim’s I’m Fearless). Straightforward, not hiding, out under the sun and making things your way. You know your cards and you play them well, mainly to protect yourself. But remember, some mischief of yours can accidentally cause a fire so please exercise caution. 

1. What type of relationship will we have? - Seven of Wands

There’s some sort of challenge I’m seeing here? Where you challenge each other and push each other to be better. But unlike Pile 2, this “better” is like… To be able to win against the other person. You two prolly have some form of conflict or competition going on. Highkey giving me enemies to lovers kinda energy. You two also persevere through the waves, where you two protect each other when someone wants to come in between you two. It’s like… “I’m the only one that’s allowed to win against them,” kinda energy, protective yet fiery.

2. How will I meet them? - Five of Cups rx

You’ll be meeting them when you’ve forgiven yourself and move on from whatever that’s been hurting you. This hurt is something that has been running deep in you and you’ve been held back by it, focusing on something else in order to forget the pain and disappointment that you’ve experienced. The reason for this pain is cuz this is something that has been running in your roots, something in your family that has affected you and has made you change your perspective of the meaning of Family. Perhaps there’s some form of betrayal? 

3. What type of person are they? - The Lovers rx

The Lovers rx really gives me the enemies to lovers vibe. A chance that this relationship can begin is that they’re not a typical lover. They’ve seen you at your worst, at your lowest, and know what your anger is like. And probably knows that you two complement each other’s goods and flaws. They accept who they are and their feelings for you, being open to new possibilities and welcoming new beginnings, especially new beginnings with you. They may be hard on you during the enemies phase, but once they’re in a relationship with you, they will not hesitate to pamper you.

4. How will I feel about them? - Queen of Pentacles rx

You’ll actually admire them with how they hold themselves, how they put themselves as their first priority. Some people may think of them as ruthless, self-centred, and for some reason I’m also picking up that some will also see your person as someone who’s unwilling to socialise. You may also think so at first. But as time passes, you’ll notice that the so-called self-centred is just them not willing to compromise as it will harm themselves and their loved ones; unwilling to socialise is cuz those kinda socialisation is energy draining; ruthless is just because they stand on their ground to fight for their own rights. You’ll slowly notice the quiet energy they have and how they don’t care about being misunderstood, which slowly draws you in, feeling secure having them by your side, supporting you.

5. How will they feel about me? - The Moon

There are a few words I’m picking up from here: mysterious, emotional, bubbly, charming, lovely. They find you charming and adorable, loving how you surround yourself with a certain mystery that is not… Attacking? Lemme try rephrasing myself. There are some mysteries that throw yourself into danger or unpleasant feelings when you try to uncover them. But not you. Your mystery is like a gift to be unboxed, allowing the bubbly and loving side of yours to be shown. They will also notice your emotional outburst is because you were wronged or justice was not on your side, and I’m seeing that they’ll be hella protective over you. You two may also share a past without y’all knowing about it. Maybe you two met before when you guys were kids? Or maybe a past life as well. They’ll find this nostalgia with you when they’re with you.

6. Our future together, what will they want from the relationship, etc. - Five of Swords rx, The Chariot, The High Priestess

I’m seeing that you guys may want to put down the swords, the fights, and to love you like the typical romantic partners. Y’know, instead of all the teasing and challenging and sometimes wanting to fist fight the other person, they wanna bring you out on dates and have fancy dinners and maybe go on a ferris wheel and kiss you kinda thing. It may sound cliche but they want to pamper you, to answer to your love languages. They appreciate you for who you are and enjoy being with you when you’re being yourself, being comfortable in your own skin. 

I’m also seeing that they have every intention to pursue this relationship with you, and prolly at a rather quick pace. There’s something that will trigger in them, letting them know that you’re the person that they wanna be with for the rest of their life, wanting you to be in their future plans as well. That’s when they start to push for the relationship and to marry you in the future. You may not know but their feelings for you are real and they love you more than you think it is. Unlike the other piles, I’m seeing there’s a marriage happening for this pile.

Overall energy: The Star, Justice rx

This reading gives me a warm, fun and honestly, fanfic kinda energy. You two shine bright in each other’s eyes, which kinda lights up the competitive streak in you two. But once you’ve gotten together, you guys will be siding with each other. It’s like us against the world kinda energy. You two are down for anything the other person wants to do, no matter how… Not good it can be. The passion for individual wins evolved into a passion for winning together, and this transition happens smoothly. You guys spend no time being confused, or questioning if this relationship will work. They’ll remember whatever promises they’ve made with you and will follow you wherever you wanna go. 

A reminder: this reading is not for your future spouse, but for a potential romantic partner who’s gonna enter into your life. So it’s perfectly alright if you do not resonate with this reading.

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Pile 4:

Card of querent: Justice rx

First question that I wanna ask you is that have you been treating yourself right? Been feeding yourself good food, staying hydrated, having enough rest? Cuz it feels like you’re not doing justice to yourself. You’re prolly in a burnout as well with you trying to focus on others instead of your own priority. Alternatively, you may also be facing some injustice yourself, where others took your credit and put the blame on you. Tho I’m seeing more of you not treating yourself right, or have been self-sabotaging. There’s also a chance of you not willing to take the best course of action. But whatever that you do, it’s causing you distress and you feel like you’re unable to find a way out.

1. What type of relationship will we have? - Seven of Pentacles

You guys will have a solid, grounded and fruitful relationship. You’ll put in the effort and work hard together to achieve what you aim. I feel that you two will know the importance of working the relationship together, knowing that the effort put in equates to the strength of the bond in relationships. Like,,, you guys do not take things for granted, and will learn that love is not just words but actions, and caring for someone is much better when you do things instead of like… Having empty words. The passion is there, but there’s an earthly, practical sense to it as well.

2. How will I meet them? - Ten of Cups

One funny thing about this was that when the card fell out, it was in reverse. But when I took it and placed it on the uhhh… Place where it’s supposed to be (spread and all), I placed it upright. And it felt right, so I went along with it.

With all that happened, it felt like the timing was right for things to happen. You’ve experienced unhappy times (and uhhhhh it’s VERY unhappy times), yet you still grit through them. It was difficult, but you decided to make changes and twisted your fate, being in content with yourself and your found family. And because of that, you were able to welcome this new person into your life as you were in a better place to manifest your dreams and desires (aka them, and other things, of course).

3. What type of person are they? - Nine of Cups rx

I feel that they’re someone who won’t be satisfied easily. They have a direction they want to head to but no final destination, which in a sense, means that they’ll constantly want more, constantly aim for more. For example, they’ve already gotten the job they wanted, then they’ll slowly climb the ladders, wanting to earn more. Firstly, they wanted to be able to afford a new phone, then a new car, then a new house. It’s like their goals keep growing and hence they need to continue improving themselves, not gonna stay satisfied wherever they are. I’m also seeing this in a sense in y’all’s relationship? But they’re more harsh towards themselves, feeling like they’re not doing enough, not loving you enough.

4. How will I feel about them? - Six of Swords rx

You may feel overwhelmed and have some trouble walking away from it. There’s a certain mystery in them that lure you in, probably there’s some eighth house synastry between you two, and that draws you in. I’m not sure what had happened, but there definitely was a time where you wanted to walk away from them, believing that you’re not suitable for them. Which… Actually isn’t. But yeah, with this, you may also feel some sort of inferiority with them, tho that’s not the case with them.

5. How will they feel about me? - Eight of Cups

You’re someone different, someone special who came into their life. They were walking away from things that have been tying them down, and they were afraid to have you in their life, tbh. They were afraid that they’d hold you down, weigh you down with whatever that’s happening with them. But despite the fear, they still want to welcome you into their life, inviting the magical you since you showed up and they took it as a sign that you’re meant to be with them. I’m seeing there’s some form of walking away from trauma together.

6. Our future together, what will they want from the relationship, etc. - Knight of Wands rx, Five of Swords, Ten of Swords rx

Honestly,  there’s a lot of fighting energy, a lot of conflict I’m seeing here. However, I don’t feel that there’s anger. The conflict is mainly due to impulsivity and fear. Lemme try to illustrate it.. Uhhh… For example, you’ve gotten into this relationship for like three months and you’ve already wanted to live with them, which you do. However, you guys barely know each other and you realise that the quirks they have frustrates you. Like, they do their share of housework but the way they do it just makes you oof. And as you continue living with them, you notice the differences you have in thinking. It’s like you two are from two different worlds and have different ways and views on how the world works. 

You guys can feel defeated by everything that’s happening, but if it’s resolved well and healthy boundaries are placed, the future will be a comfortable one. Sometimes, you’ll need to fight for your love, fight the expectations and filters of love that you’ve had, face the reality, and believe that there’s no fixed definition of love. It’s an open question and you’ll need to figure out which works for you, and what works in this relationship you share with them. I’m seeing that if all goes well, the future between you two will be very down-to-earth and realistic.

Overall energy: Death, Six of Wands

There’s pain, change and rebirth I’m seeing here. I think the Death card really symbolises the various changes and transformation you’ll experience in this possible upcoming relationship, and that you guys can come out victorious as long as you guys put in the effort. I feel like the word “effort” appeared a lot in your pile. No matter what happens, know that you both are divinely guided, and that your intuition will show you the way. It feels like a lot of challenges will be coming for you guys, but as long as you guys are constant with the effort to put things together, you guys will be fine. It’s alright to remain as who you are right now, because the you right now will grow up to tackle the problems at said time.

A reminder: this reading is not for your future spouse, but for a potential romantic partner who’s gonna enter into your life. So it’s perfectly alright if you do not resonate with this reading.

[phanrenaissance]

tell me what the video Basically, I’m Gay means to you?

daniel howell why did you send this ask to every phannie tumblr account you could find .

[skayafair]

Ghost Clothes

There were many enough posts on how deliberately and meticulously the costume designers approached the wardrobe choices for the characters.

What I want to talk about is a different thing - how clothes matter inside the show. Namely, the ghost clothes.

It's less prominent with Charles, so I'll mostly talk about Edwin.

Let's start with the fact that none of their clothing exists in a living world. It's not physical, otherwise people would have seen a pair of costumes flying around like with that jar. So I believe their clothes is being deliberately manifested.

Like I said, it's simpler with Charles: his clothing doesn't change much in general and remains mostly as what he was wearing when he died (he took off some because it was cold and soaked through but it still imprinted on his memory and mind). It's mostly just the colour of his polo that changes to reflect his emotional state.

But that's how I came to this whole train of thought because with Edwin it's much more interesting.

Because he doesn't wear what he died in. I'm not even sure it's his school uniform. Sure it has indications of "this is a young man and a student" but all in all doesn't look like a uniform to me. So Edwin chooses it very, very deliberately.

I wonder if he stumbled out of Hell wearing just the same night pajamas he had on when he was sacrificed - maybe just cleaner because it wasn't dirty or bloody back then and that's how he should have remembered it. Or maybe it remained dirty and bloody because Edwin didn't remember much of his life before Hell at that point, all the horrors being too fresh in his mind.

This look is defenseless. It's meant to be worn while asleep - the most vulnerable time. Edwin wore it when he was the most helpless and powerless - while being dragged from the bed and sacrificed. It's also a reminder of his time of torture in hell. It's also plain white - colour of purity - as a sacrifice - but also death. And, moreover, it's PLAIN. It has no distinguishing features. There's no Edwin in it, Edwin is being erased with all the torture. Lastly, this is something - just another thing - Edwin had no control over in Hell, it stayed there by default.

So I BET the first thing he did after pulling his thoughts together in living world was to change that fucking nightwear into something that was him. As an act of regaining himself and control over what was going on with his existence.

After he found out he could do that and how, of course. I wonder if he met other ghosts or just ended up back in school and stayed there for a while.

So no wonder Edwin is so thorough with what he wears. This is him - his armor, yes, but also undeniably and glaringly HIM. His existence, his way of it, his freedom and will, his choice.

Of course it reflects his attitude and relationship with others. With Charles Edwin has no issue with shrugging off both the jacket and the vest, leaving only the shirt - and even it has its sleeves rolled up and collar unbuttoned when he's ears deep in some research or problem-solving mode. Edwin is this comfortable with Charles, we all know that.

With Crystal it's always a full buttoned-up mode or I didn't make a mental note if it was otherwise some time. Hit me up if it was!

With Niko it's mostly a jacket off - which is a considerable step towards trust and comfort.

Anyway, these are little details.

And now imagine ending up back in Hell, but also back in that nightwear. Stripped off everything he was trying so hard to keep. A similar thing happens when he's taken by Esther. No freedom, no choice, no will of his own, no Edwin. Just a soul, a toy, an energy source.

The costume Edwin picked for himself as more or less default one comes back immediately once he and Charles stumble back into the living world. Notice this - he was wearing a different attire when he was dragged to hell.

Edwin regains everything - himself, his freedom, his connections.

Also I'm not sure how to interpret the gesture, but once the Night Nurse's boss proclaims that DBDA can exist as is further and they are let off the hook (although not off the leash), Edwin pats his jacket from top to bottom. I thought it might have been connected to his notebook and episode 4, but it also may be just that - "I'm still here, in one piece, and still me". His clothes is a proof of his freedom of will.

Lastly, there was another case apart from the main two when this is reflected. The girl who took her life because of two jocks - her ghost was wearing a sport suit. At first I couldn't understand why, it was clearly not what she died in (or, well, unlikely). But sport has been the most important thing in her life - her goal, her pride. No wonder that's what she chose to appear in.

UPD. Oh I've just remembered about the Cat King, another example of a character who goes through a variety of costumes. If my pov on Edwin's approach to clothing is correct, his words to the CK in the 8th episode make so much more sense. They really are alike - not just in loneliness.

[thepoisonroom]

'I flirted with the idea that instead of being trans that I was just a cross-dresser (a quirk, I thought, that could be quietly folded into an otherwise average life) and that my dysphoria was sexual in nature, and sexual only. And if my feelings were only sexual, then, I wondered, perhaps I wasn’t actually trans.

I had read about a book called The Man Who Would Be Queen, by a Northwestern University professor who believed that transwomen who were attracted to women were really confused fetishists, they wanted to be women to satisfy an autogynephilia. And though I first read about this book in the context of its debunkment and disparagement, I thought about the electricity of slipping on those tights, zipping up those boots, and a stream of guilt followed. Maybe this professor was right, and maybe I was only a fetishist. Not trans, just a misguided boy.

About a year later, on the Internet, I come across a transwoman who added a unique message to the crowd refuting this professor. Oh, I wish I remember who this woman was, and I wish even more that I could do better than paraphrase her, but I remember her saying something like this: “Well, of course I feel sexy putting on women’s clothing and having a woman’s body. If you feel comfortable in your body for the first time, won’t that probably mean it’ll be the first time you feel comfortable, too, with delighting in your body as a sexual thing?”'

-Casey Plett, Consciousness

[wyrmghost]

Recently I’ve fallen in love with Sebastian and his growth as a character and decided to make him an aged up design as well

+ I wanted to redraw some of his sprites cause I like them

[sheryl-lee]

idk if this makes sense. but i kind of love that the last of us makes me cry and viscerally FEEL true emotions on a weekly basis. like i cant remember the last tv show i watched that had me consistently bawling my eyes out and so immersed in a show because of the characters, the story, the incredibly strong writing, etc. and it doesn't feel manipulative. it just feels profound and beautiful and poetic but also tragic and... human.

[aroaessidhe]

2024 reads / storygraph

Bury Your Gays

Horror

a scriptwriter in hollywood who’s getting attention & an Oscar nom after working in the industry for years, but is being pressured by algorithm-obsessed producers to kill off the queer characters in the season finale of the show he writes

and when he starts getting stalked by the monsters he wrote (based on traumas of his past) he has to figure out how to survive, along with his best friend and boyfriend

[dont-offend-the-bees]

Anyone else just not feeling like a real person much lately?

[littlespoonevan]

one thing i will say, if tim has been waiting since season 2 to do that random sex call and purposefully chose to write it in the second fox wasn't involved anymore then i'm very curious to know what else we might get this season that fox has previously blocked

[maliro-t]

just going on the record that the last scene with pelor and asmodeus last night where ayden finally drops away into his divine form is like. top 10 scenes in any actual play show ever for me. whew

[transsextual]

had a really incredible moment this evening. went to my campus art market where one of my friends was selling the tank top i'm wearing - another friend bought it for me and i'm so overjoyed to have it. usually a fit that leans more Traditionally Masculine feels like a costume but tonight it just felt deeply correct and honest and warm. took the opportunity to take some indulgent little pictures because i do not think i have Ever looked more like myself. so happy.