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#i guess i don't really care what you do with them as the point has always been awareness! i don't mind you reposting them or what not
When you point out how neurodiversity affects whole areas of the brain, not just what we see as the presentation symptoms, it seems so obvious. I've known that many neurodivergent conditions have high rate of co-morbidities, but haven't thought about what that would mean. I really liked your explanation of what else dyslexia affects, it made me recategorise some of my sister's mom behaviours. I see time blindness, some executive dysfunction, organisation difficulties and go, yup, I've got that too, it's normal, and forget that most people don't struggle with that (I've suspected I have undiagnosed ADHD for years, but never got checked for it, since I suggested it my dad freaked out, insisting there was nothing wrong with me. I really should though)
May I ask how your synaesthesia manifests for you? I'm always curious about how neurodiversity manifests in people and how it affects them, because there are so many minor and major things not talked about. I apologise if that question makes you uncomfortable, you don't have yo answer it.
Anyway, thank you for your explanation! It made a lot of things click all at once for me.
If you want lots of examples of how my synaesthesia works, I have a tag you could trawl here. But, I have a few different types; the common numbers-have-colours one, but I also get textures and sensations and feelings, and about... literally everything. Numbers, words, people's voices, names, personalities, the plots of media, images, everything.
Soooo, yeah. Sensory overload is the big impact; trial and error over the years has shown me it's primarily auditory, so if I can wear earplugs I can cope for longer in 'busy' environments. The other thing is that it really does a number on my mathematical ability, though, because, I shit you not, the colours get in the way. When I was a small child I was shown that 3 + 5 = 8, and my brain went "Yes, orange + pink = brown, got it" and ever since then if I see a 3 and a 5 together in a sum it DOES NOT MATTER what the operator is, I immediately assume the answer is 8. 3 plus 5? 8. 3 minus 5? Also 8. 3 times 5? Buddy you'll never guess. But it's 8.
It takes conscious effort not to do this T_T
The other thing is that I really, REALLY suffer from this thing where someone goes "Hey, we should watch Program X" but the problem is, you see, the problem is, I cannot stand the sensation I get from the name Program X, and therefore I will not watch it out of disgust that is totally unrelated to the actual show. This applies to all media, places, human beings, etc. (It is obviously a thing I have to be careful of when it's human beings.)
I think everything else I have is ADHD-related though, so that's probably everything I can put down to the synaesthesia.
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dreamsky-sapphi · 2 days
Text
Nanamahi brainrots
All my comments on each point below <3
Tumblr media
Template by @ustfile (twitter)
Note: I mainly focus on Nanamahi here ⬇️
• Easily Jealous / Too Careless
Even with Nana i think Mahiru would easily still be jealous.
Not in the same way she was with Karen, but in more of a "i have a special relationship with Nana" so she can't help but feel a bit of jealousy when she sees Nana with someone else, except if it's Junna. Despite this jealousy, she wouldn't do or say anything about it, but I think Nana may guess it and find it a little amusing and tease her about it in private.
For Nana, no matter if we consider that she is still not over Junna or not, I think she would still feel possessive over Mahiru, and wouldn't hesitate to show it more than Mahiru would, things such as just approaching from behind with a bright smile like she seems to do everytime she feels threatened.
• Destroys everything to have you / Kills you to save the world
Mahiru would lean more towards sacrificing Nana for the sake of everyone. Of course she cares about Nana but she cares about everyone more, bc she knows that at this point it is almost impossible to convince Nana out of her mindset. She knows how Nana thinks so she would know what would be best in the end.
Nana probably would lean more on sacrificing everything else if she was at a point where she feels like she lost everything, but I didn't put her to the extreme bc Mahiru isn't the one in her heart, and she still cares about everyone else.
• I don't deserve any of this / I deserve to be with you
Nana thinks of herself as some kind of monster, even if she craves love like anyone else. But I don't think she'd ever think she deserves any sort of sympathy.
Mahiru just has terribly low self-esteem and would rather put others before herself in any situation.
• Would revive you if you died / Leaves you to die anyway
I'm not entirely sure for this one, I just think that above everything else, they are both too caring to just let the other die.
At least they would not let the other die without them...
• Clings onto others (especially the other) / Cold exterior
I'd say they both just like physical contact, Nana more than Mahiru.
Mahiru wasn't exactly a physical person except maybe to Karen, but I think she would like the proximity Nana would provide her, like a sense of security. Isn't it comforting to melt into a hug. Idk I just think she would like being hugged by someone taller as well.
Nana would like the contact as some kind of reminder that Mahiru won't leave her anytime soon, so more of a possessive motive.
• "This is fate, isn't it?" / "It was a coincidence, that's all"
This doesn't really reflect whether they believe in fate or not.
I wouldn't be able to tell for sure for Nana, but I think Mahiru does believe in fate, but it just never turns out the way she wished it would (first example obviously is Karen and Hikari, but also anything related to others getting the lead roles she would have loved to get).
Specifically in a Nanamahi setting, I'd say they both think this just happened to be when they needed it the most, just pure coincidence.
This wasn't meant to be but it's convenient for both of them.
• "Let's leave this place" / "I can't just leave everything for 'you'..."
Nana doesn't have much to lose anymore and would lean more on not caring about leaving everything behind to keep this relationship, bc even if it hurts both of them, the pain brings her comfort and will have trouble thinking theres any other way to feel better, at least in the present. It's easier to indulge in this temporary comfort and cut yourself from the outside to fully enjoy it.
As for Mahiru, despite her loneliness, she has too much to lose compared to Nana. Mahiru's loneliness is not the same as what Nana feels because she still has and had so many friends and a loving family who support her. She still want to achieve things and she can't just leave everything behind for this comfort which she knows is only temporary. This is where it would make more sense for someone like Claudine to bring her comfort instead, since she would push Mahiru forward more while Nana would want to stay in a constant cycle of pain.
• A bloody marriage / "I still don't feel a thing"
I'm not sure what a bloody marriage is, but I think Nana would believe there isn't any sort of "love" between them. Ofc it isn't just a random friendship (I don't think that friends just casually kiss all the time), but she would lean more on believe there is nothing worth calling "love".
As for Mahiru, she's more sensitive when it comes to romantic feelings, and might develop a little something, but definitely not a cute kind of love. More of what would be seen as emotional dependence.
Even so, she'd keep thinking to herself that it isn't love and would try to think there's nothing between them despite her growing feelings.
• Self-sacrificial / Would give you away for nothing at all
I don't think neither of these people pleasers would even care about themselves enough to sacrifice the other for nothing.
• "See you in the next life" / "This will never happen again"
They hope such a situation won't ever happen again in the future, but Mahiru would lean more on wanting to meet Nana again in another lifetime where they don't feel so sick and can have fun like they did in highschool (not that Nana doesnt want it but she might think that if they met again, things would end up the same).
• "I don't feel a thing" / "You make me feel alive"
Honestly the entire reason they're together.
When they're by themselves, it's just their thoughts and themselves. They wouldn't feel comfortable enough to open up to anyone about their feelings: they're supposedly getting better now.
I can easily think while they can act normally around others, they'd be like walking corpses once alone when their moods aren't at their best.
By finding each other, someone who can understand their ugly feelings, they can find comfort in each other's arms.
• Would go back in time to save you / Things like that are impossible
We mentionned this with Risse earlier but if Mahiru was given the ability to timeloop, she may have done it.
But my nanamahi setting is leaning towards the future where the revues are over, so when it isn't even possible anymore. Mahiru isn't aware of the timeloops.
Mahiru wouldn't even believe that is a possibility.
Nana would do it again.
• "I need anyone by my side" / "I don't need anyone anymore except you"
In a time where loneliness overtakes her mind, Mahiru would probably be fine as long as anyone could be here for her or at least make her feel needed in a way that isn't like her family needs her or her regular friends need her.
Her love and interactions with Karen have left a scar in her that doesn't heal properly and made her feel the need to find someone who can make her feel needed in a similar way again.
Nana on the other hand has given up and only wants one person by her side.
• "We're friends, right?" / "I wished we were something more"
Between Nana and Mahiru, Mahiru would probably be the one yearning for something more concrete than a weird special bond, while Nana views this more as just mutually helping out.
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gaylordscooter · 2 days
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You're at the Party
“so you brought mass murderers to my place without warning me beforehand?” Cross said.
“Haha, nice.”
“don't humor them, chara.”
Blue wrung his hands together, opening his mouth to explain only for Ink to cut in.
“Listen, these guys aren't gonna cause any trouble. Besides, I thought this was a place where people could start over.” Ink crossed his arms.
“Two of them killed everyone in their universe? Hm, a Sans killing a bunch of people…Where have I heard that before?” XChara nudged Cross’s arm.
“you know that isn’t the problem here.”
Everyone gave Cross a look as if he was the one that was being unreasonable here.
Cross sighed, “fine, they can stay. but they need to pass a test first.”
Blue narrowed his eyes skeptically. “What kind of test?”
“well, i guess it's more of a favor.”
“Is this what I think it is? You're not sending them there.”
Cross waved away his concern. “it’ll be fine,” he insisted.
“What are we talking about?” Ink questioned.
Blue leaned close to Ink. “He’s totally planning to use them to retrieve his friend.”
“Oh! Hah. Ahahahahaha!” Ink giggled like he told him a joke. His eyelights reflected his amusement as he stared at Cross. “So we’re at this part now, huh?”
Cross looked confused while Blue huffed at his words and XChara looked bored.
Ink clapped his hands together. “Well then~! Have fun with that~!” he said cheerfully.
“I'm sure those tildes have no malice behind it,” Blue deadpanned.
“Oh, when have my tildes ever held malice~?”
Blue opted for putting his hands on his waist rather than gracing that with a reply.
“Anyway, I gotta bounce! I’ll see y’all later. Don't have too much fun without me~!” He painted a hole in the ground and hopped into it while waving goodbye.
“Eugh, he's like a kid that just learned about emoticons,” XChara said.
“you can't even see the tildes,” Cross pointed out.
XChara rolled their eyes. “I don't have to. I can hear it in his voice.”
“Never mind that. Cross, you can't send them there! I’ve already been making a careful plan. To just toss it out the window and replace it with an improvised one isn't a good idea!”
He rolled his eyelights and crossed his arms. “It doesn't need to work, anyway. I don't expect it to.”
Blue’s sockets widened as he gasped. “So you're just,” he gestured wildly, “sending them off to their deaths? Where's your compassion?”
“Where was their compassion when they hurt all those monsters?”
Blue narrowed his eye sockets. “Where's your compassion?” he repeated in a duller tone.
“Don't you have a Mettaton to serve? This isn't your business.” he snapped back.
Blue threw his hands up, “Wow! Sheesh. Fine. Go have fun torturing the prisoners of war.” He stormed off with a frown.
XChara and Cross watched as he walked in a direction that definitely led to nowhere rather than towards the town.
“He has a point,” XChara stated.
“Awful navigation skills is what he has,” Cross spat. He noticed XChara’s unamused face and did a double take. “Do you actually agree with him?”
“Huh! Do I agree with him that you have no right to judge these morally messed up monsters and that sending them to that freak’s place as punishment is completely hypocritical of you?” They stroked their chin and pretended to think about it hard. “Yes, Mr. ‘the reason why our world has become a hotspot for people who messed up like you!’”
“You don't care about them at all. You're just saying that to spite me.”
“I am, thanks for noticing,” they deadpanned.
Cross brought a hand to his face and sighed.
Killer awoke. He wasn't refreshed in the slightest and he nearly panicked over waking up in unfamiliar surroundings if it wasn't for Dust smacking him on the head.
No wait, he was called Dusk now. He even came up with that name for him.
Sheesh, the sudden change is gonna be hard to get used to.
Right. New chapter of his life. Again. Again again, actually.
Ironically, he was starting to get sick of new experiences.
This wasn't a bad change, really. In fact, it was a clear upgrade. Well, that's what he thought back when Nightmare first found him too, so.
He was waiting for the catch. He was ready this time.
There was a knock on the door.
Both of them had the knee-jerk reaction of summoning a blaster angled at the door but then the rational part of their minds took over and they scrambled out of bed to hold their blasters' mouths shut.
“good morning to you guys too,” said the voice behind the door.
They managed to desummon their blasters once they recognized that it was, in fact, Horror that knocked.
There was unmistakable joy on Killer’s face. He didn't say it, but he was convinced Horror was going to avoid them since they got settled in.
He skipped over to the door like a gleeful idiot and opened the door.
Killer was surprised by his getup. It was the first time he's seen him in different clothing. If it wasn't for the red eye in his socket he wouldn't have recognized him.
The first thing he noticed was the cap he was wearing. It was a generic white cap that covered the hole in his head. Other than that, his outfit was the same as any other normal Sans, sans the signature hoodie. He also looked a lot less tired.
“‘sup, h—sans. ‘sup sans,” Killer said, barely catching himself. He couldn't help but still refer to him as “Horror” in his mind, since from the day they met that's what he called him and known him as. But those names were nothing but brands that Nightmare put on him and Dusk. They weren't names that they chose for themselves.
“hey,” he replied with a small wave, mostly aimed at Dusk to acknowledge his presence even though he hadn't approached the door yet. “so…” he trailed off, unsure.
So.
They were in unfamiliar territory now. After a whole year of living with Nightmare, they formed somewhat of a schedule. A loose one, but a schedule nonetheless—mainly built off of the way Nightmare acted. 
With that thrown out the window, every step they took was unfamiliar. Potentially dangerous. Ironic, considering they were in a safer area now. At least they assumed so.
They hoped so.
They would normally eat breakfast at this time, probably. They weren't ever exactly sure what time it was, but that's how it's been their whole life. It felt like it was around that time, at least.
“my bro said there's a bakery here.” Another pause. Okay, he didn't have to make this that awkward. “you two wanna scope the place out with me?”
Killer’s smile perked up at the edges. “hate to say it, that sounded like you just asked us out on a date.”
“‘k, forget i asked.” He made the move to shut the door.
“nah, i’m joking! we’ll go—” he whipped his head to Dusk for verification, who gave him a thumbs up. “—yeah, let's go.”
So they got out of the hotel room. The lobby had a few people, unlike last time.
None of the three really acknowledged anyone there and no one acknowledged them, until some Monster Kid said a mere hello that made them all awkwardly respond; either with a curt head nod, wave, or quiet “hi” back.
Boy, they weren't ready to be perceived by anyone else. How the hell were they going to handle entering a cafe, let alone going outside? Well, Sans managed, so.
Sans was probably the most stable of the three, let's be real. He was the only one who had contact with other people before Nightmare came to them. When it comes to interaction, Killer and Dusk have done nothing but literally talk to themselves for who knows how long.
The second Sans started to open the door, Killer protested, “actually. could you just grab me something instead? i’ll stay in the room.” When he turned to retreat, Dusk grabbed him by the arm.
Dusk gave him a look that spelled “really, coward?”
“i don't think i’m ready, okay? sue me,” he said. He could already feel eyes on him. The stares gnawed away at his bones, trying to eat him alive. 
They knew what he wanted to do.
Dusk sighed, letting go of his arm. “we can't go,” he signed to Sans.
“right…” he sounded disappointed—no that was pity in his voice. He probably didn’t even expect the two to agree in the first place. “anything specific you want?”
“nothin’ with chocolate.”
Dusk shook his head.
“gotcha. i’ll be back in a bit,” he said.
Dusk and Killer watched as he sauntered off to be a normal monster that was a part of society. Then they walked at a breakneck pace back to their room.
Once they were back in the safety of their private room, they collapsed on their beds.
Killer, face buried against his pillow, groaned in frustration. “i hate this. we're safe now and i can't even go outside. do you feel it too, dusk? that tug on your soul?”
He might kill someone if he went outside. It was highly likely.
Of course it wouldn't be that easy to return to a normal life—of course his high LOVE would haunt him. He was too tired yesterday to be bothered by it, but now, any other monster he saw that wasn't Dusk or Sans had his soul screaming for more exp.
“i’m trying to ignore it,” Dusk mumbled.
He laughed. That's not going to work. That is not going to work and they both know it. 
That’s.
That's not going to work.
“it was—it was better when we were stuck with Nightmare. we wouldn't be able to—”
“It wasn’t better,” Dusk interrupted.
“—we’re going to kill someone. we're going to kill someone and it's going to snowball and it'll—hah—it'll be like a snowball of dust!”
He was choking now, on the rotten determination coming out of his skull.
“killer.”
That's what he was, wasn't he? A killer.
“killer!”
That's all he was.
“Killer.”
Oh, someone was holding him by the shoulders. Wow, everything was blurry and stained black. No, that was just the liquid in his sockets. He tilted his head down, letting it flow out until he could see better.
Oh, it was Dusk. Right.
He shuddered out a breath. He realized all his senses had turned off for the past few seconds. When the hell did he get on the floor?
His eyelights finally focused enough to stare back at Dusk. He didn't like the worried look he had on his face. He cleared his throat, trying to play it off, but all that did was make him hack out more rotten determination.
“well…” the sentence died on his teeth the second he started. “i want to go back to sleep,” he settled on saying.
Dusk brought him into a stilted not-quite-a-hug, where he brought him closer and draped his skull over his shoulder.
They just. Stayed there. For a bit.
“another episode…i’m starting a daily streak, really.” Any humor he thought that statement would have was completely absent. God, how fucking pathetic was he? Surely Dusk was struggling with his LOVE just as much as he was but he didn’t fuss about it. He shouldn’t need Dusk’s comfort and Dusk shouldn’t need to comfort him. He was so selfish. So needy.
Killer willed himself to move away from Dusk to lay back down on his bed.
The room was quiet until someone knocked on the door again.
Dusk opted to answer the door since Killer wasn't budging.
Fortunately it was Sans who was at the door but unfortunately, he wasn't alone. Behind him was another skeleton he hadn't seen before.
He wore monochromatic clothing and there were large x’s on his sleeves and boots. He looked a lot younger than all of them. He must've been in his 20’s. His eyelights were a lot bigger than the average sans, with a slitted pupil reminiscent of a cat’s.
Despite the youthful look, one glance was enough to tell Dusk that he had a lot of LOVE too. It wasn’t nearly as much as he or Killer had, but it was more than the amount Sans had.
Dusk glared at the stranger as if he personally wronged him.
Sans didn’t look too happy either with the death grip he had on the bag containing their breakfast.
“hey,” Sans said. He walked in as if everything was fine and normal.
The stranger also tried walking in as if everything was fine and normal.
A wall of bones rose in front of him to block his path.
Killer sat up on the bed, “nope. not dealing with unwelcome company now, thank you.”
The stranger cleared his throat, straightening his posture. “well, i’m actually the organizer of this place. the name’s cross. i’m sure ink told you three about me.”
“i’ve never heard of you in my life,” Killer said.
It was painfully clear that Cross was already annoyed by Killer, despite his attempts to keep his face neutral. “i’ll just get to the point—”
“he’s gonna test us. if we pass, we can stay. if we don’t, we’re getting kicked out,” Sans said. He opened the bag of food and grabbed a pastry for himself before handing it over to Dusk.
Dusk hesitated as he grabbed the bag. He quickly grabbed the first pastry he laid his hand on and turned to Killer.
“we’re getting kicked out?” Killer repeated.
“only if you don’t pass the test,” Cross emphasized.
Killer stood up as the wall of bones went away. He shambled over to him with a misleadingly calm expression. He leaned close to Cross’s head, keeping his hands by his sides. “what’s the test?”
Cross stood his ground, keeping his eyes locked on Killer as if he would attack him if he merely glanced away. “a rescue mission,” he answered with a steady voice despite the tension.
“the blue guy said you weren’t going to torture us,” Killer spat.
“it’s not torture. i have a plan. it should be simple,” Cross insisted.
He narrowed his eye sockets. “so why are you using us as fodder?”
“it’s a test.”
Sans snagged the bag from Dusk and shoved it over to Killer. “no point in complainin’, just roll with it.”
Killer pushed the bag aside. “why are you being so compliant? he’s going to send us to our deaths!”
“because we don’t have a choice,” he sighed. “besides, we’ve gone through hell and back, what’s one more trial?”
Killer caved in and grabbed the bag to fish out a pastry for himself. He took a hefty bite from it specifically to talk with his mouth full, “you gonna leave us alone after we complete this ‘rescue mission’?”
“yeah, just this one thing and you’ll all prove that i can trust you to stay here.”
Killer winced at the word “trust”. He quickly scarfed the rest of the pastry down. Now that he thought about it, he couldn’t really blame Cross for putting them through a trial considering that they’re all murderers. Well, he didn’t think Sans should be judged to the same extent as them. He needed to kill all those humans in order to survive.
“why does sans need to go too? his friends and family have already been staying here,” he asked.
Cross looked surprised by his question. Fucker probably didn’t expect him to be considerate. “the plan’s easier with three people, and all three of you worked with nightmare.”
“worked!?” Killer shoved the bag towards Sans and grabbed Cross by his shirt. “we didn’t work with that bastard. he KIDNAPPED us! if you think for one second that we associated with him? oh you got it entirely wrong, asshole! do you think we had fun being his fucking toys?” he snapped.
“killer, let go of him,” Sans said.
“y’know what? fine. i’ll do your stupid test. nothing you put me through will be worse than what he did to us,” he snarled before pushing him away.
Cross fixed the wrinkles Killer made on his clothes. His nonchalant behavior pissed Killer off even more.
He was lucky he actually listened to Sans.
“sorry, i wasn’t aware of that,” he said quietly.
Killer calmed down only slightly at the apology. He crossed his arms and scoffed, “you better be.”
Cross waited for them to finish eating breakfast before he went over the plan.
As he talked more, the three were even less psyched about doing this.
They were going to disguise themselves and then enter the place through a portal made by Ink. The first part of the plan was finding the right monster. Cross handed them an image for reference. They collectively sighed when they saw it was yet another Sans. If he wasn't wearing the same outfit it would be hard to find him, that's not to mention that Cross said the place they were infiltrating was a packed warehouse.
The second part of the plan was actually leaving the place. Which was supposedly the easier part of the plan because Ink will arrive and make another portal once they find the monster.
All in all, this just sounded like some dumb hidden object game rather than a rescue mission.
Ink arrived at the room shortly after Cross finished explaining. He came in holding a pile of clothes, their disguises.
Said clothes were all campy and flashy.
“in what world,” Sans held up a sequin jacket that had colors that could blind hawks, “are these disguises?”
“Well you're going to a party! A rave, specifically,” Ink explained.
Killer snatched a red leather jacket and bell bottom jeans from the pile. “all of these shirts suck, i’m gonna change.” He went over to the bathroom with the articles in hand.
“Oh yeah!” Ink snapped his hand. He reached into the pockets of his pants and took out three pairs of sunglasses, each were different shapes. “Almost forgot the most important part.”
“glasses,” Sans remarked.
Dusk and Sans exchanged glances with each other.
“it's really bright there,” Cross explained.
“in a warehouse?”
“trust me, the strobe lights could probably blind you otherwise.”
Sans narrowed his sockets.
Killer finished changing and waltzed out of the bathroom, flaunting his gaudy outfit.
“no shirt?” Sans remarked.
“i said they all suck.”
“surely you could just wear the shirt you already had on.”
“actually,” Cross butted in, “after you three get back we’re burning those clothes immediately. so probably don't wear anything that's actually yours.”
“and why are you doing that?”
“Cooties,” Ink deadpanned.
Cross frowned at him.
“Anyways, take a pair. Whatever you do, do not take them off.” Ink held out the shades with a wink.
Killer opted for the triangular ones while Dusk grabbed the rectangular ones and Sans got the circular ones.
Then Dusk and Sans grabbed whatever clothing, tossing any attempts to make a cohesive outfit out the window, and took turns changing in the bathroom.
Finally, Cross looked over the three, determining if their disguises were good to go. Dusk and Sans’s fits were horrible. That neon fluffy bucket hat that Sans wore was definitely not comfortable. At least Killer had a cohesive outfit.
He spent a second longer looking at Killer's sunglasses. He leaned close to Ink. “it doesn't cover his sockets fully,” he whispered.
“It’ll be fiiine,” Ink assured. He clasped his hands together. “Okay! You're all ready to go. Don't forget, you're looking for Epic, the most notable feature is the scar on his eye socket. Keep your distance from other partygoers and do not take off those shades.” His scarf swept at the floor underneath the three, creating holes that lead to their destination.
The three could barely see Ink waving goodbye as they fell.
The landing wasn't bad, all of them landed on their feet just fine, but the change in atmosphere gave them whiplash. While it was dark as night, strobe lights flashed and lit up the place erratically.
Oh god the music.
Eurodance from the 90’s was blasting with bass heavy enough to shake the building.
Oh god, the amount of monsters.
They were also dressed in gaudy outfits, which explained why their disguises were like that.
“cool. all we need to do is find whoever the hell ‘epic’ is. should we split?” Killer asked.
“oh god no,” Sans said.
Dusk grabbed them by their shoulders to drag them around and start their search.
“they're all wearing glasses too, didn't they say a scar on the socket is how we can differentiate him?” Sans said.
Killer groaned, “this is gonna take forever! we should just ask around or something.”
“you suddenly in the mood for social interaction?”
“this sensory nightmare’s making me feel like i’m floating out of my body, i just want to get this over with.” Killer approached one of the partygoers. “hey, y’know where a skeleton called epic is?”
He was completely ignored.
“cool. awesome. if we don't split up this’ll literally take forever, peace.” Killer walked off without waiting for the other two’s input.
Dusk and Sans watched as he got lost in the crowd in a whopping five seconds.
Dusk face palmed.
“maybe…maybe we can ask the dj? then they'll put out an announcement, or something,” Sans said.
“not that simple,” Dusk signed. He spelled out “fishy”.
“would it hurt to try?”
Dusk frantically shook his fist in a “yes.”
“eh, don't be a downer. where is the dj, anyway?” He looked around, fortunately most of the monsters here were around the same height as him so his view wasn't too obstructed. “yeesh, this place is big.”
The strobe lights flickered more as they all started moving to one point. The lights shone on the DJ station, the DJ themself was still shrouded in darkness. The sound of scratching discs filled the building as the music quieted down. “HOW WE FEELIN’ BROSEPHS ‘N JOESEPHS!?”
A mechanical roar of cheers rang out among the crowd.
They recognized that voice. They most definitely recognized that voice.
Dusk grabbed Sans by the arm.
“okay,” Sans breathed, “that's fine. maybe, no one knows his deal. we can just. leave the building.”
Dusk tugged at Sans, pointing furiously at the ground.
It was hard to notice due to how dark and packed it is, but on the ground were several piles of dust.
“hm. nice knowing ya.”
“You party animals havin’ fun?! I know I am, yo!” The unmistakable sound of Fresh’s voice boomed throughout the warehouse. The lights finally shone on him. He looked exactly the same as the first time they saw him. He was spinning. a disc on his finger. “I just gots some totes rad news before we continue on with gettin’ jiggy.”
The colored lights moved over to his side, revealing a stage that was hidden in the darkness, and on the stage was Killer. He looked confused, as if he didn't even know how he got up there.
Sans nearly swore but Dusk slapped a hand over his mouth.
When he caught sight of Fresh he stood frozen like a deer caught in headlights.
“Any bros know this fool?” Fresh asked. He put the disk back on the turntable and scratched his chin. “I don't. Did we invite him?” His bemusement barely masked his elation at having prey he didn't have to catch.
Killer didn't know what to do. He looked down at the crowd. The sunglasses they wore were originally all blank but the familiar “YOLO” text was on them now.
Running definitely wasn't going to help.
“Eh no biggie. I’ll give him a proper introduction to this rad party.” Fresh turned the music back on.
Killer internally swore at Cross, cursing his entire life. He was going to die and it was going to be to the fucking tune of a stupid 90’s song about sex. Well he wasn't going down without a fight.
He summoned a blaster aimed at Fresh and fired.
Only for one of the partygoers to leap into the blast to block it.
Killer watched in horror as he dusted that monster. The familiar rush of exp hit him like a truck, he couldn't help but fall to his knees.
“oh god,” Sans muttered from the crowd.
The three were completely powerless in this situation. This wasn't a fucking test. They were sent to their deaths.
What a sick joke.
“Oh snap! Well, you're just gonna hafta replace that now, aren't ya?” Fresh disappeared with a poof, promptly reappearing behind Killer.
Killer quickly pushed himself up and backed away from him.
Fresh didn't even follow him, the stage wasn't that big anyway.
He reached the edge of the stage, back to the crowd. Only Fresh could see the fear on his face.
Some of the crowd climbed on stage to grab his ankles, anchoring him down.
 He was hyperventilating, he was overwhelmed, he felt nothing at all.
He felt nothing at all.
Dusk and Sans went as far as they could away from the stage. They eventually reached a wall. Sans leaned against it in defeat while Dusk banged his skull against it.
Sans winced at the loud thud.
They could vaguely see the stage from here. Killer was gone and Fresh returned to his station.
The party continued on like nothing happened.
“so. do you think you’ll end up back in your universe after, or.”
Dusk huffed.
“right.” Dumb question.
They just stood there against the wall watching the neverending party. They questioned if this was hell or purgatory. No, this was definitely hell.
“ey, i finally found you guys.” It was Killer.
Dusk and Sans tensed.
His soul was a shape they’ve never seen it be before. It was in the shape of a flower.
“chillax, i’m not gonna do anything,” he said. His cadence was off. “you two have just been standing there all gloomy…” He put a hand on the wall just above Dusk’s shoulder. “why don’t you come join the fun?”
With how close he was, Dusk was able to see the parasitic flower in the small sliver of his sockets that wasn't covered by the triangular shades.
Killer leaned closer to his face. “c’mon, i’m getting lonely.”
Sans socked him in the face.
Dusk flinched back in surprise as Killer fell to the ground from the impact.
Sans shook the pain off his hand. “i think we're good.”
Dusk knelt down by Killer. He took his shades off and immediately plunged his hand into the socket containing the flower.
“uh—” Sans reached a hand out but was interrupted by Killer’s lucid screaming.
The nearby skeletons slowed their dancing, turning over to the interruption.
With one last quick yank, the flower snapped off. Dusk dropped it and stamped his foot on it repeatedly.
Killer gasped for air and keened in pain. Then he passed out.
Dusk blinked in shock.
Sans cringed, “think you went a bit overboard.”
“you were the one who punched him!” Dusk blurted stupidly.
“yup, and you committed malpractice.”
The music came to a halt with a dramatic record scratch.
The lights landed on the three.
“Yo, dudes. Quit harshin’ the vibe,” Fresh scoffed into the mic.
Dusk rolled his eyelights and picked Killer up, draping him over his shoulder.
They were surrounded now, by the skeletons under his control.
Dusk summoned multiple blasters overhead, ready to fire if any of them stepped closer.
“Yeesh! You three weren't even invited! What's the dealio? That scummy octo brought you here to rustle my jimmies or something?”
That. Wasn't even 90’s lingo.
There was some feedback coming from the mic. “That thing’s not comin’ here for real, actually, right?” For once he sounded unsure.
Was he actually threatened by Nightmare?
They had to roll with the lie. They could survive this. They just had to convince him he was coming.
Sans put a hand on Dusk’s shoulder. “nah yeah, he won't have to intervene as long as we get what he needs.”
“Bogus! Whaddaheck would that dillweed need?”
Sans pulled out the image of Epic from his pocket and showed it to the nearest partygoer. “we just need this guy, and we'll be outta your hair.”
“Oooh, yeah, I get what you're layin’ down.”
Said nearest partygoer grabbed Sans’s wrist.
“You're fibbin’.”
Welp.
Dusk was just about to fire the blasters on standby, only for a cluster of bones to sprout from the ceiling and stab through the giant skulls.
Dusk grumbled. He adjusted his grip on Killer so that he didn't drop him.
“you're kinda grabbing his butt,” Sans pointed out.
“we’ve done worse.”
“go back to not talking.”
“Aight. So y’all come on in uninvited and interrupt my bodacious party? S’all good. I’ll let you dudes bounce…not!” Fresh yelled into the mic. “I’m gonna enjoy taking y’all over. You're not worming your way out this time.”
Right as his sentence ended, it was disproved. A portal opened. It was like the light at the end of the tunnel.
That portal looked similar to the ones Nightmare made, actually.
“Ah, nah, what’s the dealio?”
But instead of the guardian of negativity arriving, a huge wave of tiny not-quite-skeletons poured in like a flood.
“what,” Dusk and Sans said in unison as absolute chaos unfolded in the warehouse.
These “not-quite-skeletons” acted more like hyperactive temmies. Their giant skulls were bigger than the rest of their body making them look more like aliens than anything. They all wore bandanas that matched the color of their huge star eyelights. They bounded around the place causing total anarchy.
Fresh among others were trampled by these small menaces. Some were simply dancing to the music while others were actively jumping some of the partygoers. They swore they even saw one playing with a pile of dust.
And all of this was happening while “We Like to Party!” by the Vengaboys was playing.
A second portal opened up behind them. They didn't even get to process this before someone yanked them through.
They both landed on their backs. Killer peacefully laid atop Dusk, still managing to sleep through that all. Hopefully he wasn't in a coma.
Dusk and Sans looked at each other, unsure if they were both already dead or if what they saw was all real.
Certainly one hell of a deus ex machina, but with all the shit they’ve gone through they might as well accept it with open arms.
It was Blue that stood over them, looking utterly concerned. “oh my GOD, you three almost died! well, you would’ve been under fresh’s control for whoever knows how long and then you would collapse from exhaustion and then die, but still,” he rambled. He put a hand on his face. “If my plan didn't work…well! Glad it did! Even if it wasn't the one I initially had,” he sighed in relief. “I’m SO sorry you guys went through that! I told Cross not to do it but, ARGH, no one listens to me!” He stomped his foot, it reminded them of Papyrus.
Another portal appeared next to him and two skeletons walked out. One was dressed like they just walked out of an anime convention and the other was clearly a skeleton from Fresh’s party.
“Thank you so much Dream,” Blue said.
Dream?
The two looked closely at him. There was a star made out of magic floating by his forehead. It reminded them of the crescent moon that rested near Nightmare's forehead. He was the one that created the portals similar to him too.
“you're his brother,” Sans said.
“Hm? Brother? I don’t…”
“They already know he's your brother, Dream,” Blue interrupted.
Dream darted his eyelights away guiltily. “I promise you, I’m not like him at all. I’m so sorry he held you all captive for a year! It must've been horrible.”
Dusk and Sans didn't really care about the needless pity. Both of them had one thing on their mind and it was punching the living daylights out of Cross.
“Right…” Blue said awkwardly. “Anyway, Dream, please tend to Epic, I’ll take these guys from here.”
Dream nodded and teleported himself and the other skeleton, who was apparently Epic, off to someplace else.
Blue stared down at the three who hadn't budged at all. “So, do you guys need help getting up, or.”
“i’m staying down here, thanks,” Sans said.
“Is Killer knocked out, or sleeping?”
“he's been out cold ever since Dusk ripped off the flower in his socket.”
Blue smacked the side of his skull, looking distraught. He looked around the place—they just realized they were in someone's living room—and told them to stay there before bolting off to another room.
Sans turned his attention to Killer and Dusk. “are you just gonna have him lay on top of you the whole time?”
Dusk shrugged. Honestly he was kind of comfortable like this. Killer was like a weighted blanket.
Sans finally got up from the floor, stretching his back with a groan. He stumbled over to the couch nearby and flopped onto it. He massaged his face. “god, i don't want to do anything ever again.”
Dusk hummed in agreement.
Blue came back shortly after with a stash of snacks. He dumped them onto the coffee table in front of the couch. “I got some snacks so you guys can replenish your energy. Do any of you know healing magic?”
Dusk nodded.
Blue walked over to him, leaning down to pick up Killer off of him only for Dusk to slap his hand away. “Oh! Sorry, I thought you were stuck,” he said, embarrassed.
Dusk sat up, holding Killer in his arms. He carefully put his hand over his soul and started healing it.
“you're not even going to eat first—Okay, that's fine.” Blue looked away from the poor medical practice. He waited a moment. “Okay, you're not supposed to keep going until he wakes up, you're gonna overload his soul with magic.”
Dusk rolled his eyelights and drew his hand away.
“He should wake up in a few minutes. In the meantime,” he grabbed something off the table and threw it at him, “eat something!”
The packaged snack bumped his head and fell to the floor sadly.
Dusk laid Killer down, having his head rest on his legs so that he could pick up the snack and eat it.
Blue turned to Sans. “You should eat something too.”
Sans glanced at the food on the table, then back at Blue. “why are you helping us?” he asked.
Blue looked disheartened by his suspicion. He fidgeted with his hands. “because i want to. And why wouldn't I? Everyone deserves help!”
“real naive of you to say.”
Blue’s expression hardened. “Fine, maybe it’s more than that. Maybe I want to feel like I’m worth something by helping people out. Maybe I’m sick of people dying when I could’ve done something. Maybe I’m guilty, so I help assholes like you in order to cope! Is that a selfish enough answer for you?”
Sans grabbed something off the table to eat. “sure.”
Blue sighed, crossing his arms. “good.”
They sat in silence as the two ate a bit. After a few uncomfortable minutes, Killer finally woke up.
He rolled off of Dusk. He immediately fired a round of questions, “everything hurts. why’s it so dark. where am i?”
“The lights are on?” Blue said.
“who the hell are you?”
“i think you blinded him, dude,” Sans said.
“what?!” Killer shouted.
“He shouldn’t be permanently blinded, he just needs to eat!” Blue assured. “Carelessly yanking out Fresh’s flower temporarily blinds the victim because it injures the orbit, and any injury to that area causes temporary blindness as our magic prioritizes healing it over being able to see.”
“oh, you’re the nerd that gave us food yesterday.”
“i’m the huh?” Blue mumbled. He shook off the insult and grabbed some packaged crackers off the table to give to Killer. “Anyway, we’re not at the hub right now. You guys are gonna crash at my place, which is here, until I give Cross a talk.”
Killer gnawed on the crackers without removing the wrapper, until Dusk snatched it from him to properly open it and hand it back to him. 
Killer poured the crumbs into his mouth, a good amount of it missed and landed on the floor which Blue decided to ignore.
After blinking a few times, Killer was able to see again. “where is ‘here’?”
“I don’t really have time to explain what this place is but uh, I suggest not going outside because you might end up in a different universe,” Blue said casually. “I shouldn’t be gone for too long, but in case I am, you guys are free to raid the kitchen, watch some tv, etc—Oh yeah! I also have a book containing all my notes on the multiverse if you wanna read it. Since you three are outcodes now it’ll be useful to know about some of the threats and important areas in the multiverse.”
The three of them looked at him like he was speaking a different language.
He coughed into his hand and pulled the book out from his inventory to set it on the coffee table. He awkwardly waved goodbye which got no responses and left the house.
“that guy’s too nice,” Killer remarked. “how hasn’t he died?”
“my guess is dumb luck or he’s hiding something.” Sans sat up on the couch, looking curiously at the book, which was actually just some spiral bound notebook. He picked it up, might as well read it to pass the time.
Killer stood up, stumbling a bit as he waited for the vertigo to pass. “i’m gonna snoop around,” he announced.
“have fun with that.”
While Killer wandered off and Sans read, Dusk went over to the fridge.
Sans flipped through the pages of the notebook, skimming over the titles of various names of people and places. He paused when he saw Nightmare’s name.
“dusk, get over here!”
Dusk walked over with no haste at all. He was holding two glasses, and was currently drinking out of one. He held out the other to Sans.
Sans looked up from the book to see the concoction he was giving him. It was nearly the same as all the past times Dusk made the mistake of playing bartender. Except this time…”did you add crushed chips? that thing has at least four different textures in it now.”
Dusk shrugged.
Killer walked back in the room, looking very dissatisfied. He wasn’t able to find anything interesting or any skeletons in the closet. His sights immediately landed on the drinks. “what the fuck is that?” he chuckled.
“nah, killer this ain’t for you.” Sans took the second drink from Dusk’s hand.
“aw, what?”
“anyway,” he took a sip, “this guy has notes about nightmare.”
Killer walked around the table and sat next to Sans. “woah, that's crazy.” He leaned closer at the book, but quickly switched his target to the drink.
Unfortunately, Sans was quick enough to move the drink away before he could take a sip.
Killer grumbled disappointedly and looked back at the book, actually reading the page this time. “i mean, we already know all of this, i don't see how this is…” he trailed off as he got halfway through the page. “huh. he’s had quite the history.”
“whaddya think being ‘the guardian of negativity’ means?”
“does it matter? we hate him. end of story.”
Sans eyed the line that said Nightmare couldn't feel positive emotions. If that was true, that explained a lot of things, but did that change anything? Not really. “yeah, i guess it doesn't.”
Once he was back at the hub, Blue hunted down Cross. His angry speech died on his metaphorical tongue the second he saw him and Epic having a reunion. He stopped in his tracks and watched them from a distance.
Ink appeared by his side, also watching the two. “Ah, a happy ending.” “It was completely unnecessary for any of this to happen and you know it,” Blue said sternly.
Ink pouted. “Aw, are you mad at me? It wasn’t my idea to send those three to their deaths.”
Blue scowled at him. “But it’s your fault Fresh kidnapped Epic in the first place.” Ink looked dumbfounded and then guilty, like a dog that was caught doing something it shouldn’t. “You’re getting too good at reading me…” he sighed. “How long did you know?”
“The second we found out it was Fresh that took Epic I immediately knew it was you,” Blue deadpanned. There were only a few people who could’ve let Fresh into the place, and only one person who would’ve. Besides, ever since Cross rescued Epic from his scripted death, Ink would glare at him like he personally wronged him.
“Aw,” Ink gave him a hug, “and you didn’t tell anyone?” He didn’t just not tell anyone he also covered for him. There was a reason Cross didn’t know he did it. “There wasn’t any point to.” “And you wouldn’t rat out your best friend!”
Blue flicked his cheek bone. “Sure,” he said sarcastically. He ended the hug with Ink with a gentle shove. “Those three are probably gonna try to kill Cross though. I’m making that your responsibility.”
Ink giggled at the idea of the three hunting down Cross. “Eh, he can handle that on his own.”
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ur-fav-h-anon · 2 days
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I Get Off
Finally, the Donaka fic. it's only been a month to the day that I haunted Julia's blog with this. My excuse is that I got distracted by watching CSI.
TW's: Implied consent (I don't know what else to call it. Its not noncon, and not really dubcon.), voyeurism, power imbalance, fingering (but no penetration. I prommy it makes sense), Donaka cares in his own way.
You’re not exactly sure what it was that tipped him over the edge. The best guess you could make in your thinking impaired state is that it was an accumulation of many, many small things, some of which may not even be your fault. But, however it happened, whatever caused it, it was of little importance to you right now. 
You hadn't processed what was happening until he had forced you into an unused bedroom of his house. It was only once you saw the camera set up, pointing at the bed that you understood at least partly what was about to happen. Normally his cameras were hidden, out of view and unnoticeable. He wanted you to see this one, he wanted you to know that whatever he did to you in here, people were watching. He had then ordered you on the bed and made you sit on the end so he could adjust the camera. Once he was sure the camera was set up to his liking he ordered you to strip as he turned around to open a familiar silver briefcase. 
Had he started streaming? There was really no way to know. All you knew was that you needed to strip for him. So you do. Maybe if you had known what was going on you would have made a show out of it, taking your time stripping off your light camisole and loose skirt. By the time you're down to just your panties and bra he's turned around again, now  donning the mask and heavy gloves that you know so so well. His dark eyes are unreadable from where they show through the eyeholes, you think he could be amused but really you don't know. Instead of thinking about it you focus on stripping off your underwear, but he interrupts you with a hand.
He manhandles you down on the bed, splaying you out just so. what you don't notice, too busy with the feeling of his hands on your body, is how he adjusts your head in a roundabout manner, until it's nestled comfortably against him. What you don't know is that from where he rests it your face is completely out of frame, the view of the camera starting at your collarbones.
Your bra is already off on the floor but your panties are still on, something he remedies with dexterity that you often forget he's capable of. You know he does just about everything in life the same way he practises martial arts, heavy and sure. So it's easy to forget that he's capable of more than that at times. 
Once you're bare he adjusts your legs again, making sure that you're at a good angle for his touch more than for the view of the camera. He rests a hand down on your core, just cupping it gently as he settles you, his other hand on your lower stomach to hold you where he wants. As soon as he's satisfied, the hand over your core starts to explore, just moving in gentle strokes, top to bottom, to make sure you're wet and ready for the pleasure almost pain he's going to inflict on you. He can feel you, not with the thick leather of the glove in the way, but he knows your body, he knows when you're ready. And when you are, he starts his torture of you
One of his fingers finds your clit and starts to circle, drawing whines and moans out of you with ease. What you don't know as he draws sound after sound out of you is that he's the only one that can hear them. There's no sound on the stream. He may show you off, but you belong to him, only he has the privilege of hearing the noises you make and seeing the way your face twists in pleasure.  
He stares down at you from behind the mask, dark eyes watching you as he works you up to the peak then denying you. He does it again and again, swirling thick gloved fingers in tight circles over your clit. He knows you well enough to tell just by the noises that pour out of your mouth how close you are to that sweet peak. 
You are his, his bird in hand. He knows exactly with how much pressure to hold you. He knows exactly how many times he can deny you before you become squirmy and hard to handle. And its when you reach that point that he switches tactics. Painful denial becomes intense pleasure. 
You know the exact moment he chooses to switch, even through hazed, glassy eyes you can see the moment the look in his dark stare switches from dangerous amusement to ravenous hunger. 
He works you up again, but this time, he doesn't slow down on you. No. This time he speeds up, almost brutally forcing you up and over the highest peak of pleasure. And he doesn't slow down then either. He maintains the tight, fast, heavy circles as you writhe and shutter and scream for him. He forces orgasm after orgasm out of you, giving you what feels like as many as he denied you. You have no idea what either of those numbers are, they are lost, first to the frustration of denial, then to the overwhelming pure ecstasy he inflicts.
It doesn't take long for you for the pleasure to consume you completely and just like he knows how much denial you can take, he knows exactly how far to ecstasy he can send you. It wouldn't do to break you, at least that's what he tells himself as he removes his hand from your core. He peels off the leather glove, dropping it on the bed beside you to avoid smearing your wetness on your skin, something he knows you hate. You're too far gone to react as his bare hand gently caresses your body and adjusts you into a position to cover your modesty. 
And just like that, the show is over.
He removes the remaining glove and mask and strips off his suit jacket. He doesn't bother to redress you in your own clothes, instead manipulating your pliable body into the jacket that dwarfs you. He's only gentle like this in moments you won't remember, times when you're not in your body to witness the almost tenderness with which he picks you up and takes you to the small room you've claimed as your own. He cleans you up and settles you in the nest of blankets you call a bed. You're safe there, all tucked up and observed at every angle by his looming eyes.
Later, when he's settled back in his office, watching you sleep contently, he looks over the almost obscene amount of money his showing of you generated and plots exactly how he's going to spend it on you.
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starlingflight · 3 days
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I guess this is "hate" but not really since you're my favorite hinny writer and that won't change but I am disappointed after this last chapter.
One of my least favorite tropes is "misunderstanding that could be resolved with a simple conversation isn't, and Ginny hooks up with a random person" because it was used (a lot) by anti-hinny writers as a way to slut shame Ginny or prove she isn't a good match for Harry, that now when I see it in a fic it instantly kills my enjoyment of the fic.
I do wish you would have tagged the Ginny and Seamus relationship even if it doesn't last as a warning though.
I know I should leave this a while and then answer it, but I have a lot of feelings about this that I don't feel like taking into my weekend so sorry, anon, but you're getting my unfiltered reaction.
It's not, imo, a misunderstanding that could be resolved with a simple conversation. I mean, technically, it is, but at this point in the story Ginny is still dealing with self-esteem issues following the Tom situation, and doesn't really trust herself to read other people's intentions as they relate to her. Add to that, being a teenager lacking in life experience (this is not a hinny who have been facing death since pre-adolescence), then it's not a conversation they're going to have at this point in their lives.
I really, really, really don't care what tropes anti-hinny shippers use, and I defintiely won't be taking them into consideration when characterising Ginny like a realistic teenaged girl. If I cared even a little bit about anti-Ginny tropes, I would not be writing a story where she brews a love potion at all.
It's not negative for a young woman to explore different partners, or to have intimate encounters that don't lead to a relationship. It doesn't make her unworthy of Harry (who has openly kissed Cho in this fic already with absolutely no criticism) or a bad match for him.
Considering NOTHING happens between them on page, and their interaction totals about 10 lines (I haven't counted, but it can't be much more than that), tagging Ginny/Seamus would be a major overreaction. I wouldn't be impressed if someone tagged Harry/Ginny for an equivelent situation in a fic that otherwise didn't feature them. Notice, I didn't tag Ginny/Michael, Ginny/Zacharias or Harry/Cho for similar reasons.
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radiance1 · 8 months
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New idea.
The entire world has been turned into animal like creatures. They still walk on two legs (most of them) and they're still human in form really. Some have only ears, some have only a tail, some have fur, some has the eyes.
Some even have all three.
There was a lot of outrage about this, mostly from shock, fear of the unknown and sudden change. Unfortunately, the government couldn't do anything about it, nor could the Justice League.
It was just... natural as it was unnatural.
In fact, it even seemed to be beneficial to everyone. Some adapted better to certain climates, some developed remarkable better immune systems than they did before and it seemed certain types of parasites and diseases just stopped affecting them entirely.
All in it, it was a beneficial change, one that the government saw no need to interfere with or ask the Justice League to find a way to revert this change.
Even if everyone needed to adjust to the sudden... shift.
Somehow, by no grace of will of his own, Vlad found himself with basically everything. He has the ears, the tail, the chest fur and fur along his arms and legs and he even has the eyes.
Red. Eyes at that.
Now you see, this wouldn't be that much of a problem actually.
If this mysterious shift in his biology didn't deem him a bunny. A prey animal and, nothing against bunnies, personally, he just wished he was given something more...
Intimitading.
Like Lex Luthor-as much as he loathed to admit it-, who became a fox of all things. Honestly, a perfect example of his character if Vlad had to say anything, his cunning and deceitfulness.
Let alone the man's intellect...
Although, it did look a tad odd to see furred appendages on that man's rather... shiny head.
Such things aside, Vlad has not attended a gala in a mighty long while after the change and he already knew it would look like he was too off put by his change, or embarrassed by what animal he was given and yes, he was a tad bit embarrassed about it but unlike them he was working on a cure.
Something that provided, perhaps unsurprisingly, zero results.
Vlad did not take the government's choice lying down, he believed himself smarter, superior to whatever they have working away for them in their labs, and proved that he could create something that would give him back his human status.
Well, half-human, but that was besides the point.
He failed. So what did he do? Figure out how exactly it affected his biology, special case that he was only 3 in the world and, contrary to his expectations... it went very well? While his animal traits did indeed follow him into his ghost form, he could shift until he appeared exactly how he was before.
Small mercies. His identity wouldn't be any harder to realize than it was before, thanks to this.
He was so caught up in this, in fact, that he was surprised when Lex Luthor came out of hiding a month ago. Honestly, he would've thought he wouldn't have seen the light of day for at least a few years. So obviously, Vlad had to come out of hiding as well, and even if Vlad disliked his bunniness, it was an infinitely smaller feeling than the urge to cause Lex Luthor pain and misery.
It wasn't exactly a surprise to see the little badger being, well, a badger. A bit to see that he basically shared every trait Vlad had, if only in badger form.
But that isn't the point. The event he needed to attend-to spit (metaphorically) in Lex's stupid face- needed him to have a plus one or multiple, so what better person to go with him than his godson?
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abyssalhuntersnerd · 2 months
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It's that time of the year again where I put the fish and Amiya in the washing machine...
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#normal posts#specter and skadi will be next but by themselves#fyi I do this because these fellas sleep with me and this year they built a parking right besides my room#so the dirt and dust has gotten all over my room and my plushies are literally brown... so I have to clean them whether I like it or not#normally you don't need to clean them that often but these really need it and I won't wash them by hand cause#the dust and dirt is just stuck there so :/#I'm not a dirty gal I love keeping my room clean but these mf really got the whole house trashed#and that's not even just my room everywhere in the housr has to be deep cleaned#I have to clean my room but I'm still waiting for my dad to help me put up my ikea skadis... but at this point I'll have to myself so#I guess I'll have to watch yt vids lmao#so sorry for being out of socials I'm honestly just really tired and feel like rn things are pretty chill so my presence isn't needed here#and honestly I'm not legally allowed to talk about what's been going with me because I have some respect and would rather not shame people#online for the sake of it <3#so yeah idk does anyone miss me here hsisjddi cause I miss being here but the energy is just not it#I'm tired but I wished I had more energy for things#sighs#but yeah I will post room stuff since I will be putting some arknights decorations around once I get stuff sorted out#I can't hide that stuff anymore you know#gotta face my fears and honestly? a gift isn't something that the gifter owns it's the gifted and it's okay to be sad about it but#gotta start facing shit and being proud of stuff even if my ak energy is very low because of my personal stuff#anyways sorry for the rant but I kinda just wanted to get it off my chest I know most people won't care and they just want fish but#thanks for reading and making it all the way down here I love you
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naamahdarling · 6 months
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#my psych who prescribes my psych meds is a resident and is moving on in a couple of months#i don't even remember the names of them all at this point#this happens over and over and I cannot find a clinic that will put me with someone who intends to stay#thst will also prescribe my adhd meds#and my anxiety meds#and the real kicker is that twice now they have LIED about it and said they would#only to reveal after all the hoop-jumping that oops sorry they didn't really mean it#so it's a risk i have to take any time i leave#and rhen there's the issue of new people almost always wanting to DO something#but instead of talking to me about it they just decide that my meds need overhauling and pressure me to go off shit that works#but that they morally object to i guess#and my psych for some stupid reason has decided she wants bloodwork for my cholesterol and blood sugar stuff and im just like#what hell does THIS presage because if she harasses me about the results or tries to put me on drugs for that#I'll give her a nasty scrap about it#im not interested in those meds at all#and im certainly not messing with my diet since food is the only pleasure i get most days and even that is marginal at best#and removing that would just make me worse#but medpros for the most part really don't give a fuck about that#and so now im afraid - because i do not and cannot trust them - that if i disapprove of the meds they will retaliate somehow#which good luck proving that when management and oversight often don't even care if they course of treatment will HARM you#if it relates to being fat or having bad numbers#they just gotta pathologize!#so yeah im sick of everything and just kind of want to bury myself in a bog forever#i shouldn't have to deal with this
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monstermoviedean · 14 days
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at the end of my fucking rope with "conversations" about k12 chronic absenteeism.
#sorry. work rant#next time you read a headline about it think to yourself. why is it schools' job to get kids to come to school.#why do schools have to bend over backward to cater to kids#kids not wanting to go to school is an extremely common occurrence#the difference now is that the responsibility is being shifted off kids and parents and onto schools#i get that schools can do better i really do#i think there is a shared responsibility#but there is a profound belief across society that school is not important and does not matter#and that needs to be addressed too#i'd say 99% of the examples i hear of systemic school problems are actually just examples of individual bad actors#again. schools have issued that need to be addressed! the public school system has profound inequities!#but when the only problems you point out are 'a kid was mean to my kid' or 'a teacher wasn't as nice as they could be'#you're not interested in changing the system#you're interested in changing your kid's experience#and guess what. demonizing school staff sure isn't going to fix anything#at this point I don't see myself ever going back to teaching#you know who will go into teaching? people who don't give a shit.#and that's not going to help anything either.#you can't attract people who care when people who care are punished and chased out#imagine if instead of constantly bringing up the worst possible examples and insisting they are representative of everyone#the good examples were celebrated and rewarded#same thing happens with the medical profession btw#and again. lots of legitimate examples of harm#(i'm fat ffs i know this)#and also I think it's dangerous to have people delegitimizing medicine to the point that crystals are seen as just as valid as a doctor#sorry. separate rant.#but still. delegitimizing professions that require knowledge skill and training is how we get thousands of unqualified people#homeschooling their kids and treating them with herbs they got from their local Etsy witch
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aeolianblues · 27 days
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I'm not an extrovert. At all. In everyday life, I'm a yapper, sure, but I need someone to first assure me I am okay to yap, so I don't start conversations, even when I really want to join in sometimes! It's just the social anxiety acting up. God knows where from and why I lose a lot of my inhibitions when it comes to talking to people about music. I don't know where the confidence has suddenly sprung from. I've made a crazy amount of friends in musical circles, either just talking to people about common music or (since it is after all in music circles) talking to bands about their own music. I let out a sigh of relief any time an interaction goes well, because in truth it's going against my every instinct. I wish I could do that in everyday life
#like that's the point where we need to remind everyone around me that as much as I say#radio is 'a job'-- it's not 'my job' lol. I wish I was this interested in data science#but like. Honestly?? I'm not even a data scientist!? I answered a few questions about classical AI having come from a computer science back#background and now people are saying to me 'I know you're a data scientist and not a programmer' sir I am a computer scientist#what are you on about#and like I guess I get to google things and they're paying me so I'm not complaining but like I am not a data scientist#my biggest data scientist moment was when I asked 'do things in data science ever make sense???' and a bunch of data scientists went#'no :) Welcome to the club' ???????#why did I do a whole ass computer science degree then. Does anyone at all even want that anymore. Has everything in the realm of#computer science just been Solved. What of all the problems I learned and researched about. Which were cool. Are they just dead#Ugh the worst thing the AI hype has done rn is it has genuinely required everyone to pretend they're a data scientist#even MORE than before. I hate this#anyway; I wish I didn't hate it and I was curious and talked to many people in the field#like it's tragicomedy when every person I meet in music is like 'you've got to pursue this man you're a great interviewer blah blah blah'#and like I appreciate that this is coming from people who themselves have/are taking a chance on life#but. I kinda feel like my career does not exist anymore realistically so unless 1) commercial radio gets less shitty FAST#2) media companies that are laying off 50% of their staff miraculously stop or 3) Tom Power is suddenly feeling generous and wants#a completely unknown idiot to step into the biggest fucking culture show in the country (that I am in no way qualified for)#yeah there's very very little else. There's nothing else lol#Our country does not hype. They don't really care for who you are. f you make a decent connection with them musically they will come to you#Canada does not make heroes out of its talent. They will not be putting money into any of that. Greenlight in your dreams.#this is something I've been told (and seen) multiple times. We'll see it next week-- there are Olympic medallists returning to uni next wee#no one cares: the phrase is 'America makes celebrities out of their sportspeople'; we do not. Replace sportspeople with any public professi#Canada does not care for press about their musicians. The only reason NME sold here was because Anglophilia not because of music journalism#anyway; personal
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came back to tumblr just to find that @worldsnotsaid is gone? girl whyyy☹️
Hi anon!
It was kind of abrupt, and I do apologize for that -- truly. It's why I am tackling this ask! But, it was very freeing to delete that blog, and it felt as if a weight had truly been lifted from my chest to see it go. Bittersweet, yes! But absolutely needed. Constantly seeing asks box jump from 300 to 400+, the constant hate messages, the inboxes -- it was all too much for me to tackle, and honestly, it felt as if my blog was just no longer productive at that point.
I am always 100% behind the points made on that blog, and the problems in SJM's writing. My passion for those points will never fade or change for that matter. But I think the book community and publishing are just not ready for an actual change -- and it's tough to have the conversation about racial and abusive themes in books when people pick and choose when to chastise and ignore. It's literally like having a conversation with a wall. I can't honestly have a conversation about tackling racism in the book industry when people can't even let go of a book series that isn't even well written. We aren't being militant about the problems in the book industry, and its exactly why it looks the way it does. I don't know, I think I've grown apathetic to it. The urge for docility among reviewers disguised as 'allyship,' the flip-flop about abuse and abusive themes in books. None of it makes sense. And it's like the legwork to make it happen just doesn't seem worth having someone constantly throw vitriol in your face. It just seemed like it becomes a tit-for-tat straw-man debate in the end, and that -- again -- isn't productive. 'Tamlin stans this' and 'Nesta stans that, and it was like ?? Can we just think outside of that? We can't complain about the way PoC are always treated in the story and then turn around and defend an author who would 100% kill them off and let her white character wear their trauma like a second skin. Like how serious are these conversations when the ones having them are unwilling to stop supporting the author propagating these harmful tropes to other authors. FBAA ran because ACOTAR walked; ACOTAR ran because Twilight walked. These harmful stereotypes in these books melded and made the environment we have today. And it is what is.
As another blog asked, I will not be returning to that blog as it was deleted. But there are so many beautiful and articulate antis in the tag that adeptly explain the problems in this series and in much clearer and more concise ways! My blog was a rambling mess anyways!
Funny addition: And do you know the sheer frustration of typing up an entire post that's 2000+ with links and citations talking seriously about abuse and racism and how its portrayed in the media just for someone to skim the post and make a follow-up, sub-post that starts with: 'Tamlin stans always think.' -- yeah never again.
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girlscience · 4 months
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I hate getting into something that has a canon(ish) sapphic couple, but I only end up caring about one of the two women 😭😭😭
#warrior nun? only cared about beatrice couldn't really get behind ava much#the locked tomb? INSANE for gideon. harrow is like cool I guess (I feel like I should like her more than I do idk)#and now dungeon meshi. I knoowwwww I'm going to love falin. 10 episodes in and I already find her relatable and awesome and so cool and sexy#AND SHE BECOMES A DRAGON LIKE FUCK MAN (she's still dead atm but soon soooooon)#marcille on the other hand?? I mean she's fine... but I'm not really drawn to her (I like namari a lot more tbh)#and the thing is I know part of it is the feminization of all three of them#I am not attracted to femininity pretty much ever (outside of a super sexed up version in which case gugh)#and ava and marcielle both have a very bubbly personality type that has never really drawn me in ever#they can have cool stories and I can enjoy them in that. but I have no desire to seek them out outside of that#and harrow... honestly I think it might be the way fandom sees her that makes me not care much about her?#also my feelings about the series as a whole by the end of nona probably don't help#BUT I definitely think a big part for all three is the femininity. none of their counterparts that I DO love are overly fem#(and HONESTLY I don't think harrow should be either and the fact hardly no one actually makes her butch the way I see her pisses me off)#((she CANONICALLY hated her long hair!!!!!!!!! stop giving her anything more than a buzz cut I'm going to attack you!!!!!!))#also. marcielle has green eyes and I'm sorry but I just can't 😭#I need every single character ever in existence to only ever have brown/black or gold/yellow eyes#stop with the blue and the green 😭 please#ANYWAY POINT BEING: I hate that this happens to me because I end up not getting obsessed with the ship#and mostly only getting into the single character but then I don't want to read fic about just one person#so I try out the ship stuff and shocker no one writes the other character in a way I like so I don't read it#and then I feel bad cause all my ships and main characters I'm obsessed over are men#and then I complain all the fandom favs and mcs in stories are men#but like I'm contributing to the problem!!!! but like I'm not attracted to hannibal but I like his personality#I'm not attracted to optimus but I love how fucked up his whole deal with megatron is#I DO love both luffy and zoro even though I'm not really attracted to either of them#the lotr/hobbit ships.... eh I love the world and I love dwarves and I will do anything for them so the characters don't matter much lol#AND THATS THE ISSUE 😭 the worlds of warrior nun and tlt and most of what i've seen of dungeon meshi don't really entrance me much#so I don't get into the ships for that. and I'm not attracted to both people in the ship. and I can't relate/project on both in the ship#and sometimes I find one character type less likable/annoying so that makes me not want to engage
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edelorion · 4 months
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#edel vents#disclaimer: really personal issues in the tags. also wishes of death upon others. this is PROBABLY too much information tbh...#so if you're not up for it scroll down fast!!!! the deluge is coming!!!#today was... eventful. bad. also very bad. grandma's birthday celebration was today#and while she... definitely has Old People Issues (racist) shes also very lonely since the death of my grandfather so i can't really not go#i'm the only one who really visits her regularly to begin with#aside from the... very serious racism issue... she's “alright”. i guess. but that's besides the point. there's family there#and among those... my parents. which i don't like to talk to#discovered they threw more of my old stuff away. typical. wanted to strangle them. as usual.#had to “talk” with my mother (read: spend approximately ten seconds reciting exactly why i *don't* talk to her anymore)#so that whole ordeal completely soured my mood.#went home tired. can't really do anything right now.#at least the food was good i guess. but i also really want to cry... which i can't. which sucks.#...i really like to think i've improved as a person. i used to be really hateful of everything and everyone#worst of all myself. still kinda do but i'm... getting better..?#i like to think i've grown past most of it but every time i see my parents i feel this gripping at my heart. as if i haven't really changed#as if instead i'm still the hateful person i “always was” deep down... bc there's this visceral joy that i feel whenever i'm mad at them.#when i looked at my mother and told her how much i despise her i felt a shiver of happiness. righteousness.#to be clear: i do NOT care for her. at all. she's the worst person on this earth#and the only person whom my philosophy of “nobody deserves to die” does NOT apply to. i'm not scared of hating her.#she genuinely deserves this. but...every time i see my parents - and thus her... i feel as if i'm slipping back into that mindset of hatred#i don't want that. not anymore. it consumed me whole. i was a horrible person back then and i've caused so much grief for so many#i can't let go of this hatred. i can't forgive them. they don't deserve my forgiveness anyway. but i'm tired of hating.#i'm tired of letting that hatred define me. i'm tired of letting that hatred direct me. i'm tired of letting it bring me to ruin.#i'm tired of being who i was. i'm no longer “that”. i'm edel now and i'm happy for people now. if i don't like something i just walk out.#i can just leave. “if it sucks hit the bricks” right?.. but i didn't. i had to say it. i had to tell them. her. and i liked it.#and... i'm scared of that. because it tells me i haven't improved.#i'm not sure what i'm expecting out of posting this i guess. maybe help. maybe i wanna be told that this is normal or something.#maybe i just want to get my thoughts in order. i don't know. i'm gonna stop writing now.#sorry for making you read all this. thanks for doing it anyway. tags were cut off on this one btw so it may look like a mess. but. yeah.
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misskamelie · 3 months
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Wrt the situation(tm), I managed to resolve the communication issue between us and it's been pretty chill since then. I care about them a whole lot, but there's still something I cannot quite grasp about what I feel towards them
#it's like. Okay fine I want to see them but it's. Idk I don't even have a specific reason to want that#I'd be fine just sharing space w them. Going on a walk getting something to eat together#To be in silence in the same room each doing their own thing#Idk man I cannot understand if this is a very specific and odd thing (compared to what I feel toward others) or if this is slightly skewed#Because of the obvious and clear physical distance between us#there really is no point in bringing any of this up either because of the obvious current logistics and situation#But I really hope I get to see them in person within the year. First I'll have to find the confidence to say so to them tho#(In a 'look. I'd pass by anyway at one point but I *am* in good part motivated by the possibility to see you and hang out w you' kinda way)#it is also slightly difficult to share the correct amount of info on the situation w my friends because#While most of them have more experience than me w relationships none of them had something comparable to this#so there's 1) distance issue and 2) cultural issue because it's clear the difference of cultures plays smt into how we interact#(As in. Things they/I assume while communicating. As in. Slight difference of texting etiquette I guess?)#also like. I might complain about not getting attention but in reality? I'd get tired about *too* much attention and eagerness#Even just. How do I talk about it to others? I don't really know what words I could use to describe the relationship between us#I generally say 'friend' or 'a friend I care a lot for' if that has some significance#my post#ah who cares I have some exams to take care of first
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violenteconomics · 1 month
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as a prank, ace and epel start referring to their upperclassmen as members of their family rather than by name — when they're not actually talking to their upperclassmen, of course — just to see how long it will take them to notice. and after a while, the other freshmen start doing it, too.
ace is the first one to come up with this idea. he think it's a harmless little thing, a prank that'll cause plenty of mayhem but won't get him in any serious trouble. so he starts referring to cater and trey as his dad and mom respectively, and riddle as his uptight, no-nonsense older brother.
("one time i saw my brother try to put one of mom's tart into like a ziplock bag to save it for later, and when he took it out like two days afterwards, it fell apart immediately and he started bawling, ha ha! my dad got the whole thing on camera and shared it with me — i can show you if you want.")
he ropes epel in on the plan. epel is a little more hesitant, but seeing this as a way to get back at vil, even in a small way, he agrees to it. vil is now "ma" and rook is now "pa". people do start to wonder why he still uses he/him pronouns to refer to his supposed mother, but they decide not to question it too much.
("a few months ago, my pa told me a story about how one time my ma was trying to comb his hair, only for his comb to get stuck. so he got another comb to get the first one out, and that ended up getting stuck, too. five combs later, and peepaw had to rush him to the barber for an emergency haircut. it was pretty funny, but now i'm left wondering how pa even knew that story... hold on, i need to check my bathroom mirror for cameras, excuse me.")
surprisingly, deuce catches on pretty quickly, and he starts thinking maybe it's a new dorm policy. he doesn't know why, or why nobody else seems to be doing it, but ace seems pretty sure of himself, so he starts doing it, too, if a bit awkwardly.
("my brother always gets on my case for my bad grades. it's a little frustrating, but he only does it because he cares. my dad tutors me whenever he can, but he's not very good at studying, either. but whenever i do get good grades on my report card, my mom makes me egg tarts!")
yuu starts after they ask ace about it, and thinking it's a good prank, they decide to join in on a little mischief. so they start referring to all the teachers as their "dad". it makes people really confused, because they assume they only have one dad, two at most, but "dad" seems to change personalities every single time they talk about him.
("i was helping my dad do paperwork the other day, except we didn't get anything done and spent the entire evening playing solitaire and making dog puns."
"i was filling my dad's basketballs for him for his next game, whilst simultaneously helping him rework his pick-up lines that he's going to use on rsa's 'hot librarian' — his words, not mine. it was... a weird experience."
"i was feeding my dad's cat a couple of days ago, but i guess i fed him too much, because he's just a ball with limbs now. it's fine, though — it's not like my dad actually goes anywhere. too old for that, y'know?")
ortho is up next. idia's already ortho's brother, so he can't really do anything with that, but he really wants in on the average teenage experience of pranking your peers. so he starts referring to literally every upperclassmen he knows as his "brother". this is when everyone starts to realize that something's wrong, because some of things ortho says can not apply to idia in any reality.
("my brother is so talented! he's so good at talking to people, and making them sign contracts with him, and convincing them to invest in his restaurant... gosh, i wish i could be as good at communicating as him!")
jack is, unsurprisingly, very unamused when he figures out what the others are doing, but he doesn't try to stop them. but after a few weeks of exposure, and jack starts unconsciously doing it, too, which the others don't point out to him because they think it's absolutely hilarious.
("my brother didn't show up to morning practice, again, so my other brother and i went lookin' for him, and we ended up findin' him in a tree. obviously, my brother and i can't climb as well as my eldest bro can, so my brother just... threw a spelldrive disk at him. to get him out of the tree. and then we had to rush him to the infirmary because now he had a concussion. i don't... i don't know why he thought that would work.")
sebek is the last hold-over. not only is he unamused by this prank — and frankly very aghast when he realizes that jack has also been infected by it — but he's also really repressed and will do literally whatever it takes to not sully his image in the eyes of diasomnia. of course, with enough wear and tear, this doesn't last very long.
("ugh. my brother fell asleep on the road AGAIN! i swear, so many people have tripped over him, i'll be surprised if he hasn't broken any ribs yet.")
ace and epel think all of this is extremely funny, so they all keep trucking along with it with nobody noticing for a couple of weeks. it's all fine and dandy until the first-years are out on the town during the weekend, and deuce gets involved in a really bad carriage crash.
at the hospital, deuce starts deliriously asking for his older brother to take him home. but when the receptionist checks his familial records, they're really confused because deuce never even had a brother.
unfortunately, ace knows exactly who deuce is talking about, and awkwardly spends the next 30 minutes trying to get a hold of riddle over the phone.
the awkwardness doesn't end as riddle actually gets to the hospital, and the doctor smiles and says, "you must be mr spade's big brother."
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i think i could design a better death arena for children than those hunger games amateurs.
the whole premise of the games is all pageantry. every year you get a crop of 24 candidates around whom the entire state media apparatus dedicates an entire year to building celebrity narratives. this candidate is the younger sibling of last year's winner - these candidates are young lovers forced to compete - he's smart - she's fast - root for them, care about them, watch them, form opinions on them, bet on them. and then they stick them all in an arena to kill each other, which is a great entertainment premise, except that they make the arenas themselves really boring and generic. ooo, they're in...a forest.
it's not even an interestingly designed forest. imagine if the game designers treated their arena like an actual video game designer treats level design. discrete zones with multiple paths between each room, creative use of lighting to guide players to points of interest, points of interest scattered across the map, discoverable resources hidden to encourage exploration. instead they just have a generic outdoors location and if you get too close to the edge they throw a random fireball at you.
the 75th games are especially bad about this. the arena is laid out radially into 12 wedges, and each hour one wedge becomes especially dangerous in a 12-hour loop. as a mechanic, this is genius. it forces everyone to keep moving, making "survival by hiding" an engaging and tense viewing experience instead of someone sitting in a tree for three days. plus, it encourages players to return to the center of the arena, where travel time between wedges is short, which creates a high-value zone for players to regularly return to and conflict over. in other words, it's a mechanic which incentives players to adopt dramatic, dynamic, exciting behaviors which are entertaining to watch (not to mention it communicates geography to the audience well). but it only incentives those behaviors if the players understand what's happening, and they go out of their way not to tell the players anything! when they figure out what's going on, the showrunners spin the arena to disorient the players, like they're intentionally trying to get them to just. randomly wander the jungle instead.
this isn't even to mention how often they create undramatic, boring deaths. they plant poison berries around the arena. they supply no fresh water and no way to get it. they roll poison clouds over sleeping victims. these happen to work out in the books themselves but you have to imagine that extremely often these just result in players dying unexciting deaths.
the cardinal sin though, of course, is that nothing is done to personalize the arena for the crop of contestants that year. if i'm designing the 75th hunger games and two of my most beloved contestants famously had to cancel their wedding because of a return to the games, i would OBVIOUSLY give them a trail of, i don't know, wild game which conveniently leads directly past a well defended wedding chapel. will they hole up there for a while? hold a mock ceremony for themselves? do or receive ironic violence here? stare wistfully and move on? any of it is better television than getting attacked by generic attack monkeys. you should have a dozen of these things on the map for every single candidate. but the game makers are more interested in doing the same thing every other game has done than in telling a compelling story.
it makes me second guess enjoying the children's murder arenas at all.
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