#i had a four day weekend (well technically still in it as today is day four) so i've kinda been vibing

[sweetinsaniiity]

Sick, Little Games

► 𝙿𝚊𝚒𝚛𝚒𝚗𝚐 - psycho!blackmailer!mingi x fem!reader!Y/N ◄ ► 𝚃𝚊𝚐𝚜/𝙶𝚎𝚗𝚛𝚎 - smut with plot, blackmail, gaslighting, Mingi is kind of a dom!, restraint (via rope), public sex (fingering), semi-exhibitionism, hair-pulling, reluctance, corruption kink, it becomes consensual, creampie, no protection (do NOT do this!), cum swapping/transferring, fluff, falling in love ◄ ► 𝚃𝚛𝚒𝚐𝚐𝚎𝚛 𝚆𝚊𝚛𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐 - MDNI, violence, mentions of rape, sexual assault ◄ ► 𝚆𝚘𝚛𝚍 𝙲𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚝 - 20K (I swear I tried to make this shorter) ◄ ► 𝚂𝚢𝚗𝚘𝚙𝚜𝚒𝚜 - All you wanted was to go home and relax on a Friday night, so you take the subway. There, you encounter a man whose character prevents you from leaving. No seriously, he literally prevents you from leaving by tying a rope on your wrists while holding the other end with his big, strong hands. The rope isn't the only thing those hands will hold tonight. ◄

► 𝙽𝚘𝚝𝚎𝚜 - Welp this one is a little darker, let me know if I missed a couple of tags. This is a work of fiction and is not meant to represent Ateez in real life. Join the taglist here. Title from All Time Low. ◄

Home is all I ever wanted to be right now. The thought of my warm, cozy bed with me on it buried under my fluffy blanket is making me walk faster towards my destination - the subway.

I sighed in relief when I noticed there weren't many people, in fact there was literally no one at all except maybe the occasional passing of the cleaners and one man who was standing idly by the edge of the platform, I'm assuming he was also waiting for the next train.

I could feel his eyes staring me down even though I stood ten feet away from him. Maybe he was surprised to see somebody still waiting like him? Either way, when he didn't look away, I knew I had to make small talk to make things less awkward.

"It's finally the weekend now, huh?" I greeted him.

He was tall, maybe at six feet give or take, and he wore jeans partnered with a black blouse underneath a blacker cardigan that hung nicely against his toned frame. 

He tilted his head at me curiously and a slow smirk creeped up on his face. "Yes, it is. What's a lady like you doing out here so late at night?"

"Oh, I have a part time job at the restaurant a couple of blocks away from here, shift ended late," I replied cheerily.

He raised a brow up. "You look awfully young to be working."

"No, well, technically I'm still in university."

"Oh? Where?"

"Seoul University, I'm in my third year."

A slight smile tilted his thick lips upward. "Interesting. I graduated there three or four years ago. How are you liking it so far?"

I glanced at nowhere in particular to give it some thought. "I suppose it's okay," I shrugged, "I only have one year left anyway."

He bit his lips and nodded slowly. "Third year's usually the time when you get sick of what you're doing and you end up hating everything."

I giggled in amusement. "Well that's an interesting way to look at it, you've been in my shoes once so I understand."

He stares at me deeper, his smirk growing wider. "Too harsh?"

"No," I shook my head. "You were just telling the truth."

"I suppose I was," he chuckled. "What's your name?"

"Ah, I'm Y/N," I said without missing a beat. "You?"

He hesitated for a couple of seconds before he replied. "Call me Min for now."

I frowned. That was odd. Your name isn't usually something you think about because it's an automatic response.

"Pretty name for a pretty lady," he coolly puts his hands in his jean pockets.

I grinned at him. "Glad I have your approval, Min. Are you always like this to people you see on the subway?"

I saw a small shiver go through him before he pursed his lips. "Maybe," he shrugged. "You never know who crosses your path one day."

Something about his tone and the way he said it made it sound like he hit the jackpot, but I ignored it. Maybe it was just in my head, I mean, I am pretty tired today.

It got silent again after that. I was finally able to stare at him a little better. 

He was insanely handsome - hot, actually - he had short, dark hair that was equally messy and slicked back neatly, and it didn't help that he wore these black, thick, squared type glasses, and it made him look so charismatic.

I looked at him again when his deep voice startled me. "I don't mean to bother you, but do you have the time on you?"

A mild shiver passed through me, the good kind. His voice was deep. I cleared my throat. "Uh yeah, sure, give me a second..."

He hummed while I took a glance at my phone. I saw him eyeing the phone. "It's a quarter past 10."

He nodded in response, dragging a heavy sigh. "Getting impatient?" I asked in amusement. He scoffed softly.

"Patience is a virtue," I joked.

His sharp eyes pierce my doe-like ones, darkening significantly. "I am not known for my patience," he smirked.

I frowned at his bizarre choice of words, about to retort something profound back, but the distinct sounds of the oncoming train made me swallow my words.

"About damn time," I muttered.

"Patience is a virtue," he mocked.

He started walking towards me with slow, but long strides. He didn't break eye contact with me while doing so, and my heart started erratically breathing. The way he walked reminded me of a predator stalking its prey.

I brushed my own thoughts off, that was just absurd. I tried to calm myself by breathing in and out and by the time he reached where I was standing, the train was almost here anyway, so I just ignored him.

Suddenly, I felt him wrap his arm around my waist from behind me. I gasped loudly when his hand squeezed the fleshy part of my waist painfully.

"What the hell are you doing, Min?" I growled, turning my head around to scowl at him, but it was no use. Besides the fact that he was tall, his firm chest pushed out and prevented me from looking at him.

"Don't move," he whispered, his deep voice sending shivers down my spine, the bad kind.

He pulled me flush against him and now my back was completely touching his frontal body. It sent my body on overdrive and I thrashed this time to try to get free, but it was no use.

"I said," he put his other hand on my shoulder. "Don't move."

The train stopped, the door directly in front of us. I was petrified at this point. This man can do anything to me and none would be the wiser.

After what seemed like forever, the train finally departed and that's when I snapped out of whatever trance I was in. 

"Wait, don't go!" I wailed at the moving train, but it was no use. I despaired, that was the last ride until the next day.

I heard him chuckle from behind me, I felt his chest rumbling at the sound. It all happened so fast; one second he turned me around to face him and the next thing I knew he was tying a rope around my wrists as tightly as he could.

"Should've been louder, maybe someone could have heard you," he paused, looking down on me with his sharp eyes. "Then again, I would have just covered that pretty mouth anyway."

"Wait, please don't do this," I whimpered.

"Why not?" he asked, not stopping from tying a series of complicated knots on my wrists, each tug tighter than before it, but surprisingly, it didn't hurt.

"What do you mean why not?" I couldn't help but snap at him. "You're insane!"

He didn't respond, he unfurrowed his thick brows, once he was done with the last knot. He, then, wrapped the other end of the rope with his own hand.

His face didn't give away any sort of emotion as we stared at each other with what seemed like an eternity. I grew fearful of this man, there was no way I could fight him because he was much, much bigger than me even if I tried.

I tried to back away, but there was only so much I could do because the rope would stop me and tug me back.

"Don't come any closer," I raised my hands, or rather, my fists since my wrists were bound together.

He tilted his head inquisitively, still staring at me impassively. I panicked, tugging my hands as hard as I could and wiggling my wrists to try and loosen the thick rope, but all it did was give me rug burns. He sighed, tugging the rope once, making me pause at my ministrations.

"Why are you doing this?" I asked in a small voice.

Shrugging, he tugged on the rope again, this time a little forcefully, but not enough for me to get dragged to him. 

"No, wait, please," I pulled my hands harder, stronger, making his brows rise. "Please take it off, I-I'll give you money."

He smirked. "No."

"But--"

"No offense, angel, but I will probably make what you make in two weeks within a day."

"So you don't need me then," I laughed nervously. "Please, just take it off, I won't tell anybody."

Crossing his arms, he shook his head. "I'm not taking it off."

"Why?" I was scared, nervous, desperate at this point.

Min tugged the rope for real this time, I had no choice but to walk to him begrudgingly.

"Because I don't want to," he whispered. He was so close that I could smell the minty gum he was chewing on. "Come here."

He had the audacity to smile at me as he pulled me against his chest again, this time, facing him with my tied wrists between us. "Much better," he mumbled.

I narrowed my eyes on him. "Is this what you do in your spare time? Do you always have a rope on you?"

He raised a brow in amusement. "No. First time actually."

I tried to wiggle away from his vice grip. "Please don't hurt me."

"Never," he shook his head.

"So let me go," I pleaded.

I swallowed, my blood running cold against my veins. There was only one thing I could think of, then. His eyes roamed over my face, as if he knew what I was thinking.

"I'm not going to do whatever you're thinking," he sighed. "I'm not going to fuck you."

"Kind of hard not to assume you're not going to force yourself on me," I chuckled with no humour, cheeks blushing at his crudeness.

"Only if you want to," he grinned. He sighed when he saw no response on my end. "I will not hurt you so long as you don't fight me."

"Let me go then."

"No. I'm not going to repeat myself." It was a flat declaration and there was an underlying threat in his voice. 

"How long are you going to take me captive then?"

"Assuming that I'll even let you go in the first place," he shrugged.

I stared at him in horror. I felt his hand on my arm, the ghost of his touch tickling me, higher and higher up until it reached my hair. He stroked my hair  like a parent soothing their child. 

I gasped when he slightly tugged on it, I was expecting a sting on my scalp, but nothing. He went back to stroking my hair again, then tugging it ever so slightly. I made the mistake of sighing at his touch.

"You like that?" he murmured.

I didn't respond. I felt confused like I have never been before. Not to say that I'm happy that I was a prisoner in his arms, but my body began relaxing before I knew it.

He started tracing random patterns on my back, rendering me even more confused. Strands of my hair were also tucked behind my ear. "Pretty," he murmured again. "It would be a shame if I just..."

I groaned when he tugged my hair a little harder, enough for me to look up at him, but not enough for him to pull my hair out. "Ow!"

"Stop trying to untie them," he pointed at the wrists. "It's not going to work."

I gritted my teeth aggressively. Damn it, I thought, I thought he wouldn't notice me tinkering with the rope as he played with my hair and touched my back. 

My eyes widened when he slowly leaned forward, his face getting close to mine. I panicked, a short burst of adrenaline rushed through me as I pulled myself free from his grasp.

I swung my fists forward, a shocked look passed through Min's face, barely missing his face he quickly ducked down to avoid my hit. I squeaked when he grasped my wrists painfully and pushed me away rather roughly.

"Not bad," he laughed. "That would have been really bad if you actually hit me, yes?"

I ran off in a hurry, but quickly got stopped by the restriction the rope gave me. I hissed in pain, it had managed to dig into my skin a bit and leave red, angry welts on it.

Min frowned at me, his eyes softening as he stared at me trying to soothe the pain. He stood looking at me a few feet apart, his hand outstretched a bit towards my direction as if he wanted to beckon me over.

"You," I exhaled. "You stay where you're at, and stay away from me."

His lips twitched up in delight. "Or what?"

I blabbered like a fish, my mouth agape as my brain went into overdrive. What the hell is wrong with this man? I must've said that aloud, because the way he grinned at me with a look of amusement was making me nervous.

"I'm going to scream," I informed him.

He smiled. "Go ahead."

And so I did. I screamed, I yelled, I shouted, I screeched like a banshee like my life depended on it - well, technically, it does - and I did this for five minutes straight, but nothing. 

I wasn't soft at it either, I was yelling. Min was leaning on a nearby wall with his arms crossed, silently watching me and letting me do my thing.

I was extremely frustrated at this point. Now that I think about it, it's extremely abnormal to have absolutely nobody around, but then, I remembered that it was a Friday night and everybody was either already resting or getting drunk out of their minds. It didn't help that the subway was also underground.

"It's just you and me, doll face," he stated, biting his bottom lip and chewing on it a bit. "Save yourself the trouble."

"You can't possibly keep me here forever," I scoffed at him.

He nodded slowly in acknowledgement. "I don't see why that's a bad idea."

"If you think I'm not going to put up a fight with you, then you're sorely mistaken," I sarcastically remarked, pausing when I felt my wrists sting again.

"I'd like to see you try," he chuckled, the sound of his raspy voice echoing all over the station. It further solidified the emptiness of the place.

I thought about my next move carefully. He doesn't want money, and to be fair, I had nothing much to offer anyway. He's calm and collected, that means he knows exactly what he is doing. He has a rope, for God's sake, what else can possibly have?

"I'd really like to go home now, I'm exhausted and I have no time for your games, Min, seriously," I pleaded, hoping to try my luck on the poor damsel distress act.

"You don't really have to do anything," he shrugged. "I'm not going to make you do what you don't want to do."

I raise my brow at him with a sarcastic lift of my tied hands. He laughed a little. "That doesn't count," he laughed, his chest rising up and down.

I scoffed loudly. "What?" I barked. "Are you for real? How deranged are you? Why are you really doing this?"

He watched me intently, staring at me directly in the eye without blinking. His sharp eyes made me so uncomfortable, like he was undressing me from where I stood just by the motion of his eyes.

His lips lift into a smirk. "Because I can."

Steam started coming out of my ears. I don't care if he kills me or does whatever he wants, I was mad. "Really? Is your birthstone crystal meth?" I sassed, rolling my eyes at him to emphasize my point.

Min raises his brows so high his thick glasses couldn't cover them, then he looks down on the floor, but not before I saw the smallest smile on his face. It was probably the most genuine one I've seen tonight. He was trying not to laugh. 

"What a mouth you have, you sweet little thing," he chuckled. "How about you come closer to me right now?"

"But you said you're not going to make me do things I don't like," I frowned.

His sharp eyes narrowed, staring into my wary ones. "And I stand by that."

He pointed at my wrists with his index finger. I didn't realize he was wearing a lot of rings on his hands, but this one in particular had a nice black ring. "That looks like that hurts."

I stared down at my wrists. Indeed, they were close to being ugly and painful blisters because of how much friction I was causing them, friction I barely noticed because of the adrenaline rush and survival instinct to free myself of this damned thing.

"It does," I admitted. "Because you're letting me suffer by not letting me go."

He shook his head. "That's a strong word. I can make it better," he offered softly.

"How?"

A sly smirk makes its way on his plump lips. He pats the wall beside him, his stare not wavering a bit. "Come," he said softly.

I rolled my eyes so hard I was surprised they didn't get stuck behind my head. "Absolutely not," I snapped. "I'd rather let my wrists rot."

"You sure?"

He was waving a tube of a familiar generic ointment you'd see everywhere, the cocky twinkle in his eyes palpable. I gulped, the stinging sensation on my skin getting a bit more intense at the sight of what could be temporary relief on my end.

But alas, I chose to turn around and ignore him. I heard him sigh loudly from behind me and the distinctness of his cardigan rustling as he moved from his position.

"Seriously now," he began. When I still had my back turned on him and still completely ignoring him, he sneered. "Alright, whatever, I guess."

I peered over at him and saw him leaning back on the wall with his arms crossed again, staring me down. I hissed loudly when I accidentally angled my arm wrong, causing the rope to dig in a bit and rub against the sensitive parts of my skin.

"Fine," I scowled. I held my hand out in the air. "Toss it."

He laughed, his deep, hoarse voice booming towards me. If he wasn't such a jerk, I might have found that sexy. He grinned, taunting me by wiggling his fingers back and forth. 

"No, no, no, sweetie pie," he sneered. "You're going to come here and get it from me."

The colour from my face drained. I bit my lip apprehensively, and I didn't miss the dark and dismal look in his eyes. I don't want to go to him in case he does something shady, but is it better than being restrained?

I scowled at him. Unfortunately, nothing was better than this. My legs felt like lead, heavily treading towards him. He gave me an amused look because I had to crane my head upwards just so I could look at him.

I couldn't help the blush that reddened my ears. Darn this man, he was unfairly good looking. The way he looked at me made my insides flip upside down with anticipation and I did not like it one bit.

"Well?" I asked impatiently.

"Actually," he clicked his tongue. "I don't think so."

My brain had a major explosion. I widened my eyes at him. "That deal has already sailed," he smiled, patting my nose with his finger. "My God, you're cute," he commented when I grimaced at him.

"Please, they really hurt," I whined. I wasn't lying at this point, I had sensitive skin due to eczema and the littlest irritation can lead to the worst flare ups that usually last from a couple of weeks to a month depending on how bad they get.

He stared at me with a blank expression, though it is not to be mistaken with nonchalance, no. I can tell he was already calculating in his head on what he should do next.

He puts a finger on his chin, lightly stroking his thumb over it as his scorching gaze pierced through mine. I gulped when he suddenly brought his glasses lower on the bridge of his nose as his eyes peered from above the thick glasses.

His eyes were much sharper than I thought they were when the glasses weren't obstructing them. I had this urge to fold in on myself when he studied me deeper. I have never felt this exposed in my entire life before and I was fully clothed. Warmth spread on my entire lower groin.

"Hands up," he instructed, pushing his glasses back up. I was told and he held the knots that bound me. "I'm going to untie you so I can apply the ointment."

Before I could celebrate the tiny hope he had given me, he continued. "If you try to run away," he said softly, still looking at me. "I'm going to force you back. I don't want to hurt you."

I nodded. His fingertips trace my whole arm, smirking when he noticed the goosebumps he had caused, all the way down to my wrists. My breath hitched when he blew on my blistering skin to attempt to calm the redness down.

"I know it hurts," he whispered, his tone soothing my ears with tenderness. "Hold still, yeah? I promise I'll be gentle..."

He worked on the complicated knots he had made, tugging at them until they slowly loosened. He gently and carefully lifted the rope off and caressed the sensitive skin underneath, and just like that I was untied.

Then I made a run for it.

I ran as far as my legs could carry me, and before I knew it I had ran deeper into the isolated part of the station, but I didn't care as long as I could get away from that lunatic. I'll find somewhere temporary to hide and wait until he leaves so I can---

I screamed when I felt strong arms wrap around my waist, and before I knew it, I was lifted up and hoisted over Min's left shoulder, my bottom up in the air and my legs flailing around.

"Put me down!" I cried, hitting his back with my fists angrily. 

"Behave."

I shut my mouth at his clipped tone. I did, however, let out another scream in surprise when I felt his hand come down my behind harshly.

Spanking my ass was definitely the last thing I thought he'd do in this ridiculous situation. I was tempted to smack his butt back since it was literally in front me, but I decided against it.

"You're being an awfully naughty girl right now, don't you think?" I can practically hear the smirk on his voice as he walked a bit.

I was set down rather delicately, but I can't say the same when he pushed me against a nearby wall because it was rough. I whimpered when he grabbed my hands and put them up and also pressed them against the wall.

"What are you going to do to me?" I whispered.

He was so close to my face, so close that if he only leaned a bit our lips would touch. "What would you like me to do to you?" he asked, his voice huskier than normal.

"Let me go."

"Except that."

"I will report you to the authorities, someone has to find us eventually," I threatened, or at least that's how it sounded in my ear.

He tilted his head in amusement. "With what information?"

He was right. I only have a first name, but not a family name. He laughed, but his grin didn't quite reach his eyes. "You can tell them the name I gave you, if that is even my real name, then yes, by all means, sweetheart."

I mustered up the courage to speak. "So what is it, then?"

"Why do you wanna know? So you can scream it for me?"

I looked at him in disgust. "Seriously," I rolled my eyes.

He chuckled lightly. "Hands. And no running."

This time he actually applied the ointment for real on my hands. The way he spread the soothing balm all over the affected area made me sigh in relief, to which he smiled. If we weren't in the most unusually messed up situation right now, I might have swooned at how sweet he was being.

He was a wolf in sheep's clothing, however. The rope was back on my wrists, albeit looser this time.

"Are you going to tell me your real name?" I inquired as we both sat down on the filthy floor of the subway station, our backs leaning against the cool wall.

He met my eyes, the brown orbs analyzing me. "Wouldn't you like to know?"

"You're insufferable."

"What are you willing to give me in return?"

I paused, genuinely thinking about it for a moment. I sighed in defeat when I couldn't think of literally anything. But his smirk told me otherwise.

"What are you doing?" I asked apprehensively at his onslaught.

My eyes widened when his fingers traced my cheeks, down to my jawline, and towards my lips. I was frozen on the spot. "You should moisturize your lips often, love," he whispered. 

He pulls on my bottom lip and gently sticks his fingertips in between my lips. "Open up for me."

I put my bound hands on top of his to attempt to push him away, but he was stronger. "Are you being serious right now?" I gaped at him.

"Tick tock, the deal won't be on the table for long," he shrugged.

I glared at him. "You'll give me what I want if I do it?"

His smirk widens. "Yes."

I sighed in defeat, opening up my mouth ever so slightly, but his long, thick fingers forced them to open wider anyway. Butterflies started to form in my stomach and I looked everywhere except him. God, this felt weirdly intimate for some reason.

"Suck."

"Now hold on just a minute," I backed away, effectively swatting his hand away in annoyance. "You did not just ask me to do what I thought you did."

"But I did," he replied cockily.

"I can't believe you!" I exclaimed, incredulous at the ridiculous request. 

I was so annoyed at this point and I wanted nothing but to bang my head against the concrete floor after I banged his.

"You know what to do if you want something out of me," he was tracing my lips again with his finger.

I heaved a long sigh, swallowing all the pride I had and grabbed his arm and with that, I put his index, middle, and ring finger in my mouth while I maintained eye contact with him.

He stared at me with hooded eyes, his gaze significantly darkening with every passing second. He let out a deep groan when I made slurping sounds as I lapped his fingers like it was the tastiest thing I have ever had. I swirled my tongue all over his fingers and even gave his palm a lick.

His Adam's apple bobbed up and down repeatedly, especially when I bit his fingers softly. I alternated between that, licking, and as well as sucking. I was definitely being filthy with it, and it was absolutely humiliating to do whatever this was.

His other hand pushes my head off gently and he withdraws his fingers from my mouth. He sighed sensually when my drool dripped down from his fingers to all over his hand. 

"Here," his voice was thick. I froze when he traced my lips again, but this time, he coated them with my own saliva. "Now they're not dry anymore," he smirked.

He didn't stop there. I stopped breathing when he put the very same fingers in his own mouth. He chuckled at my dumbfounded expression.

The desire that flashed through his eyes took me aback a little when I realized I was trying to discern his taste by smacking my mouth obnoxiously. I blushed, I wasn't doing it on purpose, he had this salty, sensual taste to him that took my breath away.

"So, uhm, what is it?" I questioned, not missing the tremor my voice now held.

"Oh. It's Song."

I waited a couple of seconds for him to continue, but when I realized that he wasn't going to, my patience thinned significantly. "That's it?" I hissed. "Song what?"

"That wasn't part of the deal, you have to be specific next time," he shrugged with his eyes closed, but I can see a ghost of a smile on his lips.

"Ugh! Have you no shame?!"

He slowly opened his eyes, staring at me intently, then leaned a little closer to my face. "If I did," he whispered, his voice dropping an octave lower. "You wouldn't be here right now."

I instinctively leaned away from him. "At least you're aware ," I mumbled.

It must be closer to midnight now, I can feel it, we've been at this ridiculous game of cat and mouse for a while now. I sighed deeply while I pictured my cat, King, waiting for me home. It's a good thing I overfilled his water and snack bowl today, I just had a gut feeling. Unfortunately, I was correct.

"Penny for your thoughts, water lily?" he asked all of a sudden.

I scoffed, not even bothering to look at him. "None of your damn business," I spat.

"That's too bad," he chuckled. "I was hoping to barter an exchange with you again."

That made my ears perk up and my eyes twinkle, but I wasn't buying it. He's cunning, sly, and manipulative. There was no way in hell I was trusting anything he said at this point.

A certain slashing sound sliced through the air and in my peripheral vision, I saw Min holding something in his hand and twirling it around like it was a toy.

I whipped my head back towards him in curiosity and his smirk grew wider at the small gasp I let out.

"Change your mind yet?" he questioned with a beam.

There was a softness to his appearance in conjunction to his rugged features. Truth be told, he was probably the most attractive man I have ever seen in my life and I don't think I will ever find another one that will come close.

I scoffed. "Not only do you have a rope, but you also have a pocket knife on you like it's the most normal thing in the entire world." 

I groaned, swinging my head back and the back of it against the wall in frustration. "What the hell is happening to me lately," I cursed.

I felt something soft instead of the hard wall when I leaned back again.

"What can I say? Having both is part of my work," he muttered, his hand sandwiched between my head and the wall. "Stop before you hurt yourself."

"Work? Well, what are you? A mobster?" I blurted out before I could stop myself.

He blinked at me a couple of times before he burst out laughing. He was actually laughing, and my heart jumped at the pleasant sound. I stared at him as his body vibrated with mirth, his eyes formed into these tiny crescent as they disappeared from his mouth stretched out in a charming grin. Even his laugh was so damn attractive.

"Why?" he grinned, wiping an imaginary tear from underneath his glasses with the same hand that held hy head from the wall. "Do I look like one to you?"

"I don't know," I shrugged, frowning at him. "Are you?"

He surveyed me when he calmed down, gauging I was serious at knowing the answer to my question, but after a moment, he shook his head as he watched me carefully.

"No," he denied with a small smile.

Another laugh escaped him when he saw my irritated expression and amusement was all his eyes showed as he watched me try to cross my arms but failed since my hands were literally bound together and it was borderline impossible to even do anything remotely close.

"Uncomfortable?" he clicked his tongue.

I glared at him intensely. "What do you think?" I hissed, extremely annoyed at the fact that I can't even do anything. "You're enjoying this, aren't you?"

He nodded in acknowledgement. "I am," he replied, angering me. "Very much so, actually. But I'd enjoy it more if you'd just give in to me."

"Not a chance," I jeered with an aggravated sigh. "So if Min isn't your real name, what do I call you then?"

"Min's good for now," he shrugged, twirling the knife again expertly in his nimble hands. "And what a shame, I can be good for you, you know?"

I wanted nothing but to slap the smug look on his face to oblivion. "I think I can live without knowing what that's like," I snorted.

His brows knit together. "Suit yourself," he shrugged. "I guess we'll be here for a while."

When he saw me glaring daggers, no pun intended, at the small pocket knife he held in his hands, he twirled them faster, tempting me to just stand up and kick his balls as hard as humanly possible so I could get it.

But along that was the underlying fear that I truly didn't know what he truly wanted with me. That, alone, makes me even more terrified of being here.

I gulped apprehensively and his face switched to something else when he noticed. "You're not going to use that on me, are you?" I pointed at the blade.

He shook his head. "No. Not now, not ever. I told you, I'm not going to hurt you. I don't want to hurt you."

"Besides," he continued. "If you come to me by force, then I don't want it."

He smirked at me suggestively, to which I scoffed softly, but loud for him to hear. "I'm too good for you," I rolled my eyes at him.

Well. Not entirely. In any normal circumstances, someone like him wouldn't even be in the same room as me. I couldn't point my finger at it at first, but a man this self-assured and dauntless must be someone of higher authority and money, I was sure of it.

"That, you are, my peach," he agreed. Something surges in his eyes when he noticed the blush that covered my cheeks.

God, his eyes. There was a lifetime of struggle in there that has never been put into words. His face in general, he was out of my league.

He glances at my bound wrists and for a second, I thought he was going to set me loose. My eyes widened when he put the sheath back on the blade and set it aside, instead.

"What?" he taunted. "You don't want to cooperate."

I closed my eyes tightly and took a deep breath in defeat. "I'm at a total loss right now. You want me to exchange you something, correct?"

He nods enthusiastically. "But not the knife?" I quipped.

"I don't want to let you go yet," he shook his head.

"I am aware..."

A small smile forms on his face as his brows shoot up, waiting for me to continue. "But I have nothing more to offer you," I rambled. "I have nothing on me that will interest you."

"And that, my little dove," he hummed. "Is where you're wrong."

Hot, red anger coursed through my veins when he dug into the pockets of his black cardigan and took out my wallet.

"Where did you even get that?" I seethed.

He shrugged. "Take a wild guess."

I wanted to scream in disbelief. He must've gotten his hands on it when he carried me earlier. I had a terrible habit of putting my wallet in the back pocket of any pants I wore.

"Even if I let you go, how would you get home?" he said. "Taking the subway meant you lived a decent distance from here."

He was right. Walking was out of the question because if I did, I would walk three hours. The subway cut the journey into half an hour.

I stared at him, calculating how I would get my wallet out of his claws and taking him down at the same time.

"Don't even think about it," he laughed. "I'm much bigger than you, and you know it."

"What do you want, Min?" I sighed in desperation. "Tell me what is it that you want so you can let me go, what do you want from me?"

He tilted his head to meet my eyes, slowly jutting his arms out to reach towards me and touch my chin lightly. He titled my face gently in his direction, and I was able to meet his eye as well.

"I want you," he spoke softly. "You would think that tying you up would make that very obvious."

I couldn't look away from his burning gaze even if I tried; I could have held it forever. His eyes were dangerously penetrating, he looked pure male at this very moment.

"Tying me up is not the solution, though, you psycho," I frowned at him.

"Humour me this," he uttered, waving his hands in the air as he spoke. "It's almost midnight and when you get to the sub, there's a big, scary man waiting in there, wanting to say hi..."

He paused, waiting for me to internalize the imagery. When it dawned on me, I sighed. "See what I mean, babygirl?" he chuckled.

"Don't call me that," I snapped. "Also your logic is ass."

He smirked, ignoring my statement. "Call you what?"

My scowls deepened when his eyes slowly trailed down from my eyes to my chest. He laughed when I lifted my wrists to attempt to hide them, but there was no point. I growled for him to look away, but of course, he was who he was and he only stared at me, not saying anything back. 

His gaze wasn't uncomfortable, rather, there was a hint of wonder in them and it made my breathing constricted and shallow.

I know that look - it was scheming. The lasciviousness in which he stared at me was shamefully making my core ache, the patch of wetness staining my underwear was proof enough.

He sat straighter and his form, especially his upper torso, became bigger. He inched closer to me. "Kiss me," he whispered breathily.

There was a bomb that went off in my brain. I blinked owlishly at him. "Excuse me?"

He bit his lip to stop himself from smiling. "You heard me, Y/N. I want you to want me."

He licked his lips, his eyes clouding over when I shivered involuntarily when his deep, sultry voice said my name like he was praying for me to say yes.

His brows raise and his eyes widen a bit when I start to advance, leaning my face very slowly towards his face. His Adam's apple bobs up and down and his eyes flutter close as he held his breath.

Instead, I went to his ear as closely as possible and whispered, "Go kiss the wall instead, you sick fuck."

I didn't know what else to say, but more so, I didn't want him to see that he was getting to me little by little. He was manipulative, calculating, and conniving.

"God," he let out a groan that sounded like a tortured animal. He closed his eyes tightly as if in pain. "You're such a tease, little tart..."

He banged his head a couple of times on the same wall he stopped me from banging my head down. He rested his head on it for a while.

I couldn't help but stare at his face and how peaceful it looked when his face was relaxed. I couldn't believe this was the cocky and arrogant man that held me hostage.

He suddenly opened his eyes and they were darker than I previously saw, his smirk was dirtier too. "I'll give you your wallet back if you kiss me."

"Are you kidding me? Seriously?" I shrieked exasperatedly. "This is essentially blackmailing!"

"Call it whatever you want," he grinned. "But yes, I do agree."

"Now you're just doing this on purpose! You're going to get what you want anyway, why don't you just do it?"

He paused, his brow raised. "Okay," he shrugged.

Before I can process what was happening, Min lifted me from the ground and placed me on his lap, and now, I was straddling him. His heavy eyes were the last thing I saw before he grabbed the back of my neck and pulled me towards his lips.

"Wait--"

I whined on his lips, trying my very best to push his hard chest with my fists, but all that did was instigate him to wrap his arms around me and pull me even closer.

Surprisingly, he wasn't rough with it, but he wasn't gentle either - just desperate. I felt his tongue lick my lips, pushing them apart. He moaned lowly when I wasn't giving in, and his moan got louder when I unconsciously scratched his chest at those unholy sounds.

"Baby, please let me in," he rasped, his lips giving mine little kitten pecks as he spoke through the kiss. "Here, take this."

He momentarily broke the kiss and put my wallet in my pockets for me. I was frozen, I could feel both of our heartbeats going very fast, and I gasped when his hand squeezed my hips firmly.

"I can't do this," I said breathlessly.

He hushed me, leaning in and kissing my jawline slowly. I tensed under his touch, and he stops to hold my face between his hands.

"Relax," his breath was shallow as he looked me in the eye. His intense eyes lingered on my nervous face. "I'll be gentle, okay? Just give in to me, kitten, please."

He was about to lean again, but his black glasses kept hindering the movement. He cursed under his breath as he tried to adjust it.

"Take it off for me," he demanded, his voice taut.

"How?" I gulped, my brain blank with all the overwhelming sensation he was giving me.

"Use your teeth."

Panic started to take over my body. I could feel it trying to push itself out of my stomach, my chest, my throat, my head. I wanted to throw up. I whimpered when his hand went up to my waist and pressed on it, a jolt of pleasure shot down to my clenching wetness.

I swallowed, leaning towards his face, tingles spreading through my scalp as his eyes never left me as I took the black frame in between my teeth and spit it out.

I gasped when I saw his eyes, not because of how heated and impassioned they were, but because of what they literally looked like - dark, seductive, desperate.

I felt my heart constricting tightly. He was painfully beautiful, and looked so dangerous.

"Come here," he growled, crashing his lips against mine once more.

I gasped in pain when he roughly tugged my hair back. I was so taken aback when he forcefully put his tongue in. I refused to let my tongue play with his, mewling and struggling from his hold.

"Oh," I moaned quietly when he bit my lower lip, suckling it gently with a force that knocked the air out of me.

"You're insane, doll, the woman you are," he voice was thick with lust. "You're turning me on even more."

"Stop!" I squealed in abrupt pleasure when his hips bucked up, his hardening erection suddenly pressing on my clothed mound.

An animalistic growl tore out from his chest when he dominantly grabbed my ass and started pushing me in and out, manually grinding me on his hardness fast and hard.

"Oh my fucking God," he grunted, burying his face on the crook of my neck as he pulled me harder. "Oh, God, oh, shit.."

I was moaning along with him, pathetically savouring the feel of my warm heat dry humping his bulging hardness. I was ashamed of myself, for imagining how big he was based on how he felt. 

The only thing to be heard in the empty subway station was our breaths, filthy kissing sounds, and the obscene moans from the both of us. Desire flowed through us, causing our bodies to melt against one another

He pulled away for a moment and I blushed at how red his face was and how bruised his lips already were. "I need to touch you," he croaked. "Can I touch you? I--"

"Hey, did you hear that?"

Cold reality washed over me as if a bucket of freezing ice was poured from my head in one go. I pushed him as hard as I could, as hard as my shame would take me, crawled out of his lap with disgust.

"Wait," he hissed, grabbing me by the arm as he stood up. I whimpered at his demeaning tone, but also how roughly he held my arm. 

"Silence," he growled at me. "There's people in here."

The look on his eyes as he stood up and looked around, surveying the area to find the source of the random voice we just heard from the distance was alarming, and they frightened me.

I was disconcerted, I just made out with this man, and how was now compared to what he looked like underneath me was a contrasting difference. His sharp eyes were terrifying, one look will have you submitting to his control.

I paled. I had almost forgotten was dangerous this man actually was - that I was his prey to consume, and he was determined to play with his food before he devoured it.

He pulled me in front of him, pushing me lightly as he guided me to walk until he reached a dark corner that would hide us from anyone. It's not the best hiding spot, but it was the fastest we could find.

But wait a minute, why were we hiding?

It was as if he knew what I was thinking and he covered my mouth with his hand before I could muster up a scream.

"Do not," he warned. "Nobody goes in this area unless they're looking for something," he paused, tensing up behind me. "Or someone."

My eyes widened when it clicked. He was right, this area was a well known spot for mob deals and other shady businesses. It was an unspoken secret that everyone knew, but chose not to comment on. An infamous eight-membered group ruled this area frequently, and while they never deemed terror, their name alone sparked chills on everyone.

Footsteps got closer and closer until there were two people who stood on the spot where me and Min were sitting down. I froze, they were mobsters - the black suits gave it away.

"I could have sworn I heard something in this area," a man with a shorter stature murmured, looking around in the darkness with a stony face.

"'Have' is the keyword," the other taller man with the most intimidating face mocked. "I'm going to kill him when I find him."

"Relax, Seonghwa. Don't get your panties in a twist."

The taller one, Seonghwa, glared hard at his companion. "And I'm going to kill you with him, Hongjoong, if you don't shut your face."

My captor scoffed lightly behind me, his breath fanning my ear. I elbowed him to shut up, and his jerk reaction was to tighten his hold on me. I wanted to scream, I didn't even notice his arms around me.

I felt him lift my hair up and move it to the side to expose my neck. I dug my nails on his arms at the pleasure he gave my sweet spots.

"You smell so good," he whispered sensually, sucking on my neck. I stifled a moan when he bit hard. "I want to hear you so bad," he groaned.

While the two mobsters bickered back and forth, there was me and Min hiding in a dark corner, hoping to not be seen, yet he's making it utterly difficult.

I staggered backwards, my mind swirling with nothing but bliss, my breaths shallow and heavy. His hands slowly trekked upwards..

"Wait no, please, we can't do this here," I pleaded, quickly stopping his hand from fondling my tits.

"We sure can," he pushed my hand away forcefully, but I used my other hand to scratch him. 

His body stiffened. "That wasn't very nice of you," he jeered. I gulped.

My paranoia triggered when his other hand wrapped around my throat, choking the words out of me. Whatever false sense of hope I had that he wouldn't hurt me when out the window.

"You've been testing me, little doll, and quite frankly?" He was indifferent, his voice not betraying his emotions. "I am getting sick and tired of it."

"Please," I whimpered when he squeezed the sides of my neck. "It doesn't feel good..."

He chuckled, something sinister lay brewing underneath. "But it does, don't lie to me."

I clawed his hand repeatedly, but he wasn't budging. "You said you wouldn't force me to do what I didn't want," I cried quietly.

"I know," he agreed. "But your eyes are telling me otherwise."

He pulled on the rope, forcing my wrists down permanently, as he went and did whatever his desires told him to do.

"Are you gonna be good if I let your neck go?" he asked in a deceptively soft voice. I nodded apprehensively. "That's a good girl."

He unbuttoned my blouse just enough for my bra to get exposed, and I had to suppress a moan when cold air hit my skin, but not for long as Min's hand hastily pushed my bra down to fully expose my average sized tits.

Soft groans escaped him as he roughly fondled them in his hands and I couldn't help my own groans. "Hush," he kissed my neck. "You don't want them to hear you."

He put his fingers at my open mouth and I used them to plug the sounds of pleasure threatening to spill out of me. God, his rough hands felt too good against my skin.

His mouth was on mine again as he held my stiff nipples with his nimble fingers. It sent jolts of desire all over my body.

"Do you feel good?" he murmured in between the kisses. When I ignored him, he bit my lower lip. "Answer me, love."

"Mhhm," I hummed, and he seemed to let that go for now.

I gasped when he squeezed them hard, the overstimulation of him alternating between rough and tender almost made me want to come undone. All I could do was mewl as he toyed with my body.

"I'll go to the other corner, Joong. Keep looking there," I heard Seonghwa mutter before his footsteps receded. I almost forgot they were still here.

"Doesn't the thrill feel good?" Min smirked, attacking my neck again and leaving pretty bruises on them.

"For you," I sighed. "You're the only one enjoying it. Seriously, how can you do this? How can you take advantage of me while we're supposed to be hiding from the mafia?"

"Ever so sarcastic, my pretty princess," he snorted.

While one hand massaged my tits, the other went south - going lower, lower, and lower until I felt him stop at the hem of my pants. My heart rate picked up.

"You're going to enjoy it too," he said softly. "I'm going to touch you, okay? I want to feel you, I need it so bad..."

The desperation in his voice caught me off guard, it shamefully made my pussy clench onto nothing as wetness covered it entirely.

"A-And if I say no?" I stuttered.

"I will push you out and give you to those two turds out there."

My blood ran cold. "You wouldn't," I gasped. He wouldn't let two mobsters who can kill me take me, right?

"My queen," he whispered, possessively pulling me closer in the tight space we were hiding in. "Remember this, I have never, and never will, given you opportunities where there was no way out of them."

I gulped. He was right, and I hated him for it, but that's what made him manipulative - he would give me these options that he carefully crafted and no matter what I chose, it will always end up with him getting what he wanted one way or another.

These options weren't for me to feel safe; he was merely giving me a chance to do things the easy way or the hard way, but either way, they were still his way.

"You were doomed the moment I laid my eyes on you," he stated darkly. "Oh, my sweet little peach..."

I closed my eyes tightly as he worked his way inside my pants, cupping the throbbing heat of my core. He nudged my legs apart with his foot, but I wasn't giving up.

"I'm not going to hurt you, okay?" he exhaled a sharp breath. "Relax, love, I'm going to make you feel good, I promise."

"I'm scared," I whimpered with raw honesty. Danger was still looming around us with Hongjoong and Seonghwa lingering around the area.

He didn't reply, instead he brushed his plump lips all over my neck and my now exposed shoulders. I couldn't help the tiny moans coming out of me as he worshiped my body gently. I suppose it worked, it calmed me down.

I heard his sharp intake of breath followed by a throaty moan when I leaned my head back against his shoulder so he could have access to my neck. "Stay like this," he groaned.

"Please," I choked when his fingers pushed my underwear apart and gently rubbed my slit up and down.

He grunted deeply, hungrily. "This is for me, yes?"

I whined at the absence of his touch when he pulled his fingers out and quickly reddened at the sight of his fingers coated with my juices within seconds of touching me.

It was obscene and it shouldn't have been so arousing, the wet sounds coming from my pussy when he parted my lips with his fingers again, but this time, he went straight into my clit, rubbing delicious circles on it.

My moans were borderline pornographic when he finally inserted a finger inside me and stars blinded my vision for a bit when he pinched my nipple at the same time. He slid his fingers in and out with a fastening pace, the wet sounds of it echoing all over the corner we were in.

"Shit, baby, your cunt feels so good, oh God," his deep moans kept hitting my ear and he smirked when I became impossibly wetter. "Say you want more, Y/N."

I whimpered in protest when his fingers stopped all of a sudden. "Fucking say it, then. Say you want more," he demanded with a furious growl.

"I want more!" I cried, tears falling from my eyes. "Please, Min, just please, I-I want more---ah!"

He roughly drove two fingers back in me and I could have exploded when he licked my tears. His long fingers were deep inside me, curling them as he searched for that particular spot. I bit his arm to avoid being too loud when he found it.

This angle had my swollen clit directly on his thumb and he applied pressure just enough until I started tightening on his fingers.

"We're leaving, there's nothing in here."

I'm not sure if that was Hongjoong or Seonghwa at this point, but I didn't care to know, I didn't realize how weird it was that they were announcing it at this time, not when Min had finally let loose when he practically dragged me out of our hiding spot.

He hastily took his cardigan off, set it down on the floor, and pushed me down on it so I could lay down on the floor. I yelped when he roughly shoved my pants down, leaving me completely exposed to him as he loomed on top of me.

And just like that, his fingers were back inside me again, sliding them in and out of me. The way his face looked in this light, I will never forget it. He looked more fucked out than me and he was the one getting me off.

"I-I think I'm, uhm," I moaned when his fingers down there got rougher, faster, harder and he just stared at me with lust-filled eyes as he finger fucked me.

"Tell me what you want, Y/N," he groaned. 

I feel my orgasm approaching me fast and hard like an oncoming train. He finger fucks me even faster than before as he took in my pleasure filled face.

"I'm so c-close," I moaned loudly. "M-Min, oh shit, Min---"

"Mingi," he grunted, his eyes never leaving mine. "My name is Mingi."

He leans over to kiss me quickly before leaning up again. "I want my name on your lips when you come, okay?"

"Mingi!"

With that, I let go. Wave after wave of pleasure plummet my body and I scream his name, his real name. He was moaning with me and I saw him resisting to close his eyes so he can watch me come until I was exhausted and shaking, until he couldn't. 

"Say my name," he growled, leaning down and burying his head on my neck as he slowed his fingers down. "Say my fucking name."

My throat was hoarse by the time I was done wailing his name. I was out of it for a while, Min - Mingi - kept giving me tiny little kisses here and there wherever his lips touched. He shushed me as he let go for a while, pulling out and sucking the fingers he used to make me come.

I watched him put my underwear and pants back on as if he didn't just give me the most mind blowing orgasm. When the ecstasy subsided and died down, I wept. 

"You're okay," he would keep assuring, lifting me from the ground and embracing me in his hard chest. "Shh, don't cry. You did so well for me..."

He buried my face on his shoulders as he embraced me, patting my back soothingly as I let my tears fall from the overwhelming feeling my body felt.

I am so ashamed of myself. This was wrong. I wasn't supposed to want my captor, the one who kept blackmailing me. I felt immense guilt and distraught. The pleasure I felt was so good, but it made me feel so dirty.

"I am no different than a harlot," I sniffled against his skin.

He sighed deeply. "You're not."

We stayed like that for a while - me just letting my feelings pass and him patiently waiting for me to finish. He would whisper comforting words as he gave me pecks here and there, wiping my tears away. It felt so wrong.

"So," I cleared my throat, pulling away from him and sitting beside him instead. "Song Mingi, huh?"

He nodded. "How do I know you're not lying?" I questioned, the doubt clear on my face.

Mingi looked a little offended. "My queen," he spoke. "I may have tweaked our deals a little bit, but I never lied to you once."

I hate how right he was. "Stop calling me that," I murmured. "It feels a little intimate. Why do you keep calling me that?"

Mingi smirked at me, taking my wrists in his hand and working on the knots. "Wouldn't you like to know?"

My eyes widened. "No," I rejected. "No more deals, please."

He laughed that deep and attractive laugh of his, concentrating on untying the rope, tugging on it repeatedly, until it became loose, and he guided my hands until I was completely free. I breathe a sigh of relief, pulling my hands to myself and stretching them over and over to make them mobile again.

"What's the catch?" I frowned. He wouldn't just do this for free.

"God, I love how perceptive you are," Mingi remarked flirtatiously. "But no, nothing. I just want to get you cleaned up."

He juts his finger in a random direction. "I have my car outside, we can clean you up there. I have water too. Then you can go."

I was at a loss for words. "Really?"

"Really," Mingi confirmed.

When I gave him the 'go' signal, Mingi proceeded to carry me in his arms, swooping me in one go, and he carried me like a blushing bride. I wasn't a bride, but I was blushing. I knew he was strong, but this was crazy strong. I wasn't the lightest person out there.

I didn't even protest when he started walking out of there, I was too tired to argue, and I saw his eyes twinkle when I leaned my head on his chest as he walked.

"You were never going to ride the train in the first place, weren't you?" I whispered all of a sudden. He had a car outside of a subway station.

Mingi raised a brow as he looked down on me. "No."

"And those two mobsters, the mafia, they were looking for you."

He was smirking this time. "Yes."

"You were going to escape from them, weren't you?"

"Sure."

"What do you owe them?"

"I'm afraid I can't answer that, my queen."

"Please?"

Mingi pauses, staring at me. Then he sighs and relents. "Money."

"Is that what was in your backpack?"

"Do you actually want to get fucked? You're still very sentient, babydoll. Maybe my dick will shut you up---"

"You forgot your glasses inside!" I blurted out, my voice raising by one pitch in embarrassment. I felt my face heating up with his straightforwardness.

Mingi gives me a confused, incredulous look before he opens the door to his car and sets me down comfortably on the plush seats. "I never needed them," he cryptically said.

"Nice ride," I murmured, taking in the luxurious interior and the modern technology attached to it.

He hummed in response, handing me a bottle of water to which I drank greedily. It could have been poisoned, but at the moment, it was the least of my concerns. He lowered the windows so I could also use the water to rinse my face and hands.

"What now?" I questioned.

Mingi gave me a small smile. "You can do whatever you want, go home if you will."

"You sure?" I blurted out before realizing how stupid that was.

He laughed, realizing it as well. "I'm sure, Y/N."

It felt surreal at the moment. It was as if what happened between us was just a figment of my imagination, and it made me even more anxious. It was a little too easy.

"How am I gonna get home at this time," I sighed to myself rather than question it. It was well after midnight and the buses were all gone at this point and I didn't have enough money to get a cab. 

"You know how to drive?" he lazily asked, looking at the distance out into the empty city.

"Yeah, I do," I replied, not sure where he was going with this.

Mingi nodded, tossing me the keys, and I caught it in surprise. "She's all yours," he said.

My eyes widened. "W-What?"

"The car, Y/N, it's yours now," he chuckled. "Drive home, and take care of her for me, yes? She was my favourite."

"Hold the hell on, Mingi," I blabbered. "Are you high right now? You can't just say things like that!"

"Think of it as a gift," he shrugged. 

I stared at him in confusion when he got out and walked around the car, knocking on the passenger window where I was. I quickly crawled to the driver's seat and pressed the window open.

"H-How about you? How will you go home?" I stammered, genuinely concerned. "I'm just borrowing your car, right?"

He smirked, shaking his head. "No. Don't worry, I have more where that came from."

"You used the money you stole from the mafia?"

His eyes widened a bit before he burst out laughing. "More or less," he snorted. "But seriously, do you not like it?"

I scoffed. "Of course I do, this is a Bugatti, for fuck's sake!" 

"Ah," he dismissed. "It's a Centodieci, it's not that much." 

Damn right, I thought. I suppose I deserve this after all the crap and assault he subjected me to, but still, it felt wrong.

When he saw me biting my lip, hesitating, Mingi chuckled, and he was about to answer, but headlights suddenly blinded both of us. "Well," he spoke, tapping the car twice. "My ride's here."

My heart lurched out of my chest. The way Mingi was looking at me, I can't stand it. He was looking at me like I was the brightest star in the universe and the best thing he could do was stare at it because he couldn't reach it. Mngi began walking away, straight to the other car, but I stopped him.

"Mingi, hold on," I called out. He paused from his steps, looking back at me expectantly. My words got stuck in my throat, and the only thing I could say was, "I'll see you around."

He chuckled, low and sinister, and I was thrown into a whiplash. "You don't want that, doll, trust me," he shook his head. "Don't tempt me right now."

"W-Why?"

He opened the door of the other car, leaning on it as he stared at me with a dark look in his eyes. "I'm giving you a chance to run," he professed.

Right. I forgot how manipulative he was. "So run, Y/N, run far, far away," he continued, a daunting smirk on his face, "Because you're mine if we meet again."

And with that, he got in the car and it drove away, leaving me to stare at it as it disappeared from my view.

What did that even mean?

I drove away, apprehensively I might add, to get home. It was a breeze, I hate that I am now very in love with it. I got extremely dizzy when I realized it was voice powered too. Out of curiosity, I asked how much this car cost.

Bugatti Centodieci, top of the line, costs $8.8 million dollars as of 2024...

I almost swerved off the lane when I heard it. Was Mingi crazy? I scoffed, laughing maniacally. 

Who was he? This can't be right. My insides quivered, no way it was this easy, surely there was a catch in between? He was cunning, what if him giving me the car was a part of his stupid games? I wouldn't put it past him.

And so, I drove home with an underlying guilt and heartbreak.

Mingi filled my thoughts all day and all night for the past month.

He was like a barnacle that didn't want to unstick from me and truth be told, it was getting extremely tiring. No matter what I did, I always saw him. I haven't been on any subway or train stations at all.

The worst part was that I didn't exactly know what this feeling was. At first, I thought it was fear - I was scared that he would come knocking on my door one day and claim me against my will, but no, nothing had happened.

I had so many questions left unanswered, questions that were giving me nothing but grievances, and in hindsight, a part of me wanted to see him again.

"Are you going to go have drinks with everyone tonight, Y/N?"

I paused from walking to turn around and found my co-worker, Wooyoung, at the restaurant where we both worked.

"I'm not too sure, Woo, I'm not really feeling well as of lately," I told him truthfully. This is Mingi's fault.

Wooyoung gives me a worried glance. "Everything okay, Y/N? Are you feeling sick?" he asked with a frown. 

I gave him a halfhearted grin. He was always very sweet and I loved that about him. "Don't worry Woo, I'm just going to go home and rest," I twirled my car keys between my fingers and Wooyoung eyes it.

His eyes comically widen. "Wow, Y/N, you drive a car like that?" he says excitedly. "You always rode the bus though..."

I raised a brow. Has he always been this observant? Before I can question it, he snaps his fingers happily. "Can I see it? My brothers don't want me to drive," he pouted.

"Sure," I laughed and I guided him in the parking lot. "I overheard you talking to the others and mentioning that you had seven brothers?"

Wooyoung laughed. "Ah, that. We're not blood related, but we've been together all our lives. Blood isn't always thicker than water..."

We continued talking until I pointed the car to him. I started to go towards it, but I halted when I heard Wooyoung's sharp intake of breath. His eyes were wide as he stared at the black Bugatti, and I was amused.

"Where did you get this?" he inquired, his tone firm, his eyes piercing.

I was taken aback with Wooyoung's shift of attitude. He walked confidently towards the car, lightly trailing his fingers on the hood. Long gone was the cheery boy I knew him for. 

"It's you," I heard him whisper.

My heart palpitated faster and faster when he walked towards me. "Stay here," was all he said when he walked away and called somebody.

I was so damn confused, what the hell was going on? Did Wooyoung know me outside of work? Oh God, I hope he didn't think I stole the car! I mean I get it, I earn shit in the restaurant as a server so I'd understand why he would think that.

Against my better judgment, I ran away from the parking lot into nowhere in particular. There was something dark looming over him in that odd conversation and I didn't want to be part of whatever that was.

As I was running hastily, I dropped the car keys. Cursing under my breath, I went back and tried to find where it dropped. I frowned when I realized where I was - in an isolated dark alley.

"Aha!" I exclaimed when I saw the keys and bent down to pick it up, but a foot stepped on it before I did.

I looked up to see three hooligans - tattoos, dank breath, yellowed eyes, you name it - grinning maliciously at me. I paled and it rendered me paralyzed.

"Well boys, looks like we got a jackpot right over here," the biggest man with the ugliest looking face grinned disgustingly. "You're the owner of that black baby in that parking lot!"

They all laughed rambunctiously to themselves. I was frightened, but I wanted to kick myself. Of course, the expensive car would've caught someone's eye sooner or later, but I didn't think it would be like this.

"P-Please," I whimpered, tears springing up my eyes. "I-I'll give it to you, you can have it, just don't hurt me..."

I gasped sharply when a skinny looking man grabbed me by my face and ogled. "You're hot," he leered. I almost threw up but I held it in. "Wanna play with us, doll? We'll give you a good time!

Tears started falling from my eyes. Mingi called me his doll, and it sounded heavenly from his lips. When they said it, I felt extremely insulted and violated.

"No, no, please!" I screamed when one of them held my arms and restrained me. "Stop!"

"Hold still!"

"No!" I bellowed. "I didn't get to where I am just to be manhandled by fuc---"

I choked, a stinging sensation on my right crippling me, the backhanded slap on my face was stronger than I thought and I hit the pavement below me. Was this the end? I groaned painfully when I felt myself being dragged on the ground. 

My tears were free falling as I felt hands grope me in places I didn't want them to, but I couldn't do anything, black spots danced on my vision, but I still yelled, hoping someone would hear me. 

"Stop it, please, take the car!" I shrieked, thrashing around, but that earned me another slap on the face.

"Damn, bitch, don't you ever shut up?" They laughed disgustingly. I cried out when I felt hands trying to lift my shirt up. "We're going to have so much fun---"

"What's going on here?"

The three hobos paused from their tracks, and froze when they saw the owner of the voice. I was in a haze, I probably had a concussion at this point. I could only hope that the new voice was here to help me...

I lay helplessly on the dirty ground and even though that felt terrible, at least I didn't feel their hands on me anymore, but I could still hear their conversation very well.

"B-Boss, greetings to you and your brothers," I heard them say as they bowed 90 degrees from where they stood.

In the distance, I saw three men standing straight, arms crossed in their chests except the one at the very front. I shrinked onto myself. They were the mafia.

They were Ateez, the 'A' symbol they wear on their suits was a dead giveaway. I panicked when I put two and two together. Were they going to hurt me too?

"Why are you imbeciles disturbing the peace?" a built man with the fiercest eyes I have ever seen sighed. He had this interesting reddish, pinkish hair.

"Wait," the other man with the deeper voice said. This one was handsome, his greenish, blackish hair suited him well. "You fuckers can't get it up so you terrorize a woman?"

"B-But, we know her," the three hoodlums lied. "We swear!"

A sudden panic attack tightens my chest and my breathing turns shallow. I'm so scared, and I am in pain right now. I groaned  and everybody turned to look at me, but my haze couldn't make out faces clearly, especially their expressions.

Green haired man smirked. "Yeah?" he pointed at me. "Doesn't seem like it."

"I should kill you sons of bitches here," the pink haired one snarled, grabbing the gun he had and pointing it straight.

"Please, brother, spare us!" they shouted over and over again. I panicked, whimpering my ears to soothe the oncoming migraine I felt. I panicked even more when I realized I had blood, probably from my fall.

"Shut the fuck up---"

"San."

My eyes fluttered open as the world around slowly started to fade. That voice...

"Put the gun down," the third and last person spoke - the presumed boss. His voice was deep, calming, yet it induced fear in me.

"Why?" pink hair, San, growled.

"I won't tell you twice."

I tried, I really did, my best to glance at the tall man with the most lulling voice, at least to my ears. He was familiar, I just know that he was, it was breaking my heart trying to remember somebody who I couldn't at the moment. 

I knew one thing - he was painfully beautiful, and the way he looked at me, it was like I was the brightest star in the universe, only this time, he can reach me and not just stare at me from afar.

He stepped forward, his strides powerful and domineering, and his eyes never leaving mine. There was something about him that felt different; he was dominant, compelling, and more dangerous than the other two.

"Step aside, maggots," he stated calmly, but so commanding.

"Boss, n-no offense," one brute interrupted, the one that slapped me to the pavement. "W-We really like t-this one, if you may--"

"Move."

"B-But---"

I saw the head mobster glance to his right. "Yeosang." 

Green hair, Yeosang, nodded once and proceeded to roughly shove the thugs, apparently also mafia henchmen, to the side, giving them little punches and kicks here and there. 

My head lolls and the muscles on my neck barely keep up with me. I can feel myself slowly slipping away. A shadow covers my view. He was so intimidating. He reaches his hand out, and I cower in response.

"No," I groggily shoved the head mafia's hand away from me. "Don't hurt me..."

He sighed, crouching down and sitting me down despite my protests. "Little dove, you know I would never," he whispered.

My heart started beating out of control as I stared at him closer. He was wearing this bluish suit along with a white dress shirt. Through my blurry vision, I can tell that he was the most attractive man I have ever seen in my life. I don't think anyone would come close...

I frowned. That train of thought. This wasn't the first time...

"Boss, my liege," I heard the ruffians speak. "Why are you forsaking us, your brothers, for some whore?"

I whimpered when I saw him take his sunglasses of, his eyes twitching, a glare of emotional coldness and complete disregard of anyone. It was terrifying.

"You dare call your queen a whore?"

That voice, that deep timbre, it brought a sense of relief to me. "Mingi?" I inhaled, shaking when it hit me.

His facade drops a bit, his eyes shining in relief, before it turns stone hard again. 

The world seemed to stop for a moment, and the world never stopped for somebody like me. I was too far gone to acknowledge the sharp gasps.

I felt myself being carried and I automatically leaned into his hard chest. I was supposed to be terrified, frightened, but I was not. Everything seemed right at the moment and even if my head didn't know, my heart did.

I've felt this way before. I've been carried like this before. I've been in his safe embrace, wrapped in his heady scent.

I felt him plant a small kiss on my forehead as he carried me out of the alleyway. "You're safe now," Mingi whispered. "Let's go home, okay?" 

I resisted, not wanting to go out just yet, but the tiredness and dizziness was catching up to me. As Mingi was about to completely walk out and go inside a car when we were stopped.

"Min, what do you want to do with them?" San asked. He then turned to me and bowed a bit. "Greetings, our queen."

I frowned, but that quickly turned into aghast when I watched Mingi hand Yeosang a handgun. "Beat the fuck out of them, Sannie, yeah?" he smirked sadistically.

He turned to Yeosang next with a smirk. "Then use that," he beamed darkly. "And use it well. Do not let me down, Yeo."

San and Yeosang look at each other, their eyes glazed with ruthless vigor. "With pleasure," Yeosang smirked. 

I kept going in and out of consciousness every twenty minutes or so. I was in the backseat of a car. 

And Mingi wasn't helping either. When I would try to shrug him off to just lay on my side to relax, he would possessively grab onto my waist and pull me to him.

"Stop it," I whined. "Thank you for saving me, but that doesn't give you the pass to touch me."

He hummed, not even bothering to respond. I wasn't in the mood for his bullshit today, so I shrug him off harder.

"Enough," he warned, a slight edge to his voice. "A month ago, you couldn't do it even if you tried." I hissed when he grasped my waist tighter. "It's like you never learned your lesson."

I blushed at the memory despite the haze. "Where are you taking me?" I cleared my throat pathetically. "My apartment is close to here."

Mingi stared at me before chuckling slowly. "Oh, you sweet, summer child..."

I shivered both in anticipation and fright. I can't be sarcastic with him like I did the last time I was with him. Song Mingi wasn't a regular person, I know that now. I have a sneaking suspicion who he was exactly, but the matter at hand wasn't that.

"Mingi, please, not now," I pleaded when he leaned towards me, stopping only a few inches from mine.

"You have forgotten what I told you before we parted ways," he murmured with a small smirk on his lips. "Surely, you didn't forget me that quick?"

"How could I forget you?" I glared. "You are the most insufferable person I have ever met." 

He smirked. "How could you forget?" I held my breath when he whispered softly. "When your cunt took my fingers so well?"

I inhaled a sharp breath when he gave my lips a small peck. "You're mine now," he whispered. "Don't you ever forget that."

I was about to retort something stupid, but I couldn't when I groaned in pain, clutching my head when a sudden headache stopped me.

"You're bleeding, my sweet pea," Mingi frowned, his fingers lightly touching the dried, caked blood on my forehead. He tutted. "That fuckface. Come here."

My cheeks reddened when Mingi lifted me and placed me on his lap. I instinctively wrapped my arms around him for support. "Jongho," he called, his deep, commanding voice booming all over the car with authority.

"Here," I heard a voice towards the front. I groaned when we hit a road bump.

"Careful, Jjong. Easy on the road," I heard Mingi sigh while he was rubbing my back in a slow manner. It was honestly soothing.

"Sorry," the driver, at least I assume him to be, apologized. "I've been driving for a while now, where to?"

There was a slight pause. "Doll?" Mingi whispered directly in my ear. "You're going to have to stay awake for us, okay?"

I buried my head on the crook of his neck, breathing in his comforting scent. "My head hurts," I whimpered. "They hurt me really bad..."

"Shh, I know, I know. Can you sleep?" he tenderly asked, his arms wrapping around me tighter. I nodded in response.

"That's a good girl," he said. "Yunho's, then. Think you can reach there in thirty, Jjong?"

"Of course," Jongho snorted. "But only if I get to stay and not clean up after Yeo and Sannie. They're brutes."

"Look at you telling me what to do," Mingi raised a brow when Jongho gave him a sheepish smile. "Fine. Wooyoung will do it."

""But I'm worried about her," Jongho glanced at me through the rear mirror. "She might get nauseous."

"I'm fine," I snapped, burying my head deeper into Mingi's neck. "Just fucking drive before my head splits in two. I'll apologize to you later."

I felt bad for cursing at him, given that this was the first time I've ever seen him. My first impression was the least of my concerns.

Both of them laughed for a couple of seconds. "I see you picked the right one," I heard Jongho chuckling at Mingi, his eyes glinting in amusement, but there was that same darkness that he held. "Hang tight, our queen."

Everything was such a blur afterwards, all I knew was that I wanted to rest and forget about everything. The moment my head hit the pillow, it was game over.

When I woke up, I found myself with the most agonizing headache. I clutched onto my head, it certainly felt like my skull was trying to get out of my head.

It took me a while to realize that I wasn't in my own room, rather, I was in the most luxurious room with the plushest king-sized bed, wrapped in the most velvety blanket and surrounded by the softest pillows.

Everything hit me at once - my overnight shift, almost being forced against my will, to being in Mingi's car. I was mad at myself for being so damn weak that I can't even fight back when the need arose. If Mingi and his group didn't come in time, I just know I'd be dead by now.

Or worse, sold off. That was absolutely worse than being dead.

"You're awake."

I looked around to find the source of the voice and there he was. At the foot of the bed, a tall man stood. He was taller than Mingi, and Mingi was damn tall, himself.

"Who are you?" I asked with a frown.

"The owner of this house," he beamed. "My name is Yunho, our queen. Jeong Yunho."

He rolled a cart with antiseptics and more medical stuff out to the side. "You're a doctor," I declared, touching my forehead to find it all cleaned and healed up.

He nodded. "Luckily you didn't need any stitches, just a couple of bandages. Mingi can help you replace them later."

My heart skipped a beat at the name. "Speaking of," I cleared my throat. "Where is he?"

He smiled widely at me. He seemed nice, definitely reminding me of a puppy. "Doing some...stuff."

"I know what he does," I said. "Of what you guys do, more or less."

"I'm sure you do," he chuckled. "Mingi is not a subtle person."

He crossed his arms as he walked closer to my side of the bed. "You're very interesting," he remarked with a smile. "I can see why he's drawn to you."

"What do you mean, Yunho?"

"Well, for one, you didn't freak out when you saw me. The usual response to a random stranger in your bedroom is not nonchalance."

I squinted my eyes at him. I shouldn't conclude my thoughts about these people from looks alone; no one is who they seem to be here.

"You're observant," I commented.

"Yes. He can observe his way out of this room, as well."

Yunho laughed and I scoffed loudly when we both turned around and saw Mingi leaning on the door with his arms crossed.

"No thank you, Mangi?" Yunho approached Mingi with his arms wide open.

"Get out," Mingi ordered.

"Oh, come on now, I just wanted to check up on our queen," Yunho teased.

"Get out," Mingi repeated, raising his voice a little.

"But I want to know how you guys met--"

"Get," Mngi gritted his teeth. "Out."

"Okay, okay, goddamn," Yunho raised his hands out in response and beelined the hell out of the room, but not before waving at me jokingly and laughing on the way out.

The atmosphere was so awkward, it filled the massive room with uncertainty. I couldn't even look Mingi in the eye, for fear of him doing something to me. I was at the mercy of his presence, and in his property. He can do whatever he wants and none would be the wiser.

"I must say, Y/N," he began to speak, making me jump a bit in surprise.  "Had I known that the next time I'd you see was being cornered by dead motherfuckers, I would have never let you go that night."

"Dead?" I squeaked.

Mingi smirked, his eyes glinting with something dangerous. "They will be soon."

He was at the very end of the room, but he was so unnerving. But by God, Mingi was the devil wrapped in an angel's grace. I didn't even recognize him at first.

He was wearing this tight, long-sleeved muscle fit shirt that emphasized just how bigger Mingi actually was. He had no glasses on, allowing me to see through his sharp and calculating eyes, and his dark hair was completely down, his bangs covered his entire forehead. 

It was such a contrast to the very first time I saw him, and to be completely honest, I wasn't sure which one was worse - him wearing a casual outfit with the same dangerous, murderous aura was deceiving.

"You," I gulped. "You are the devil."

He titled his head in a menacing angle. "How so?"

"You know exactly what I mean, you took me here without even asking for my consent, Mingi!"

He stayed silent, staring at me with the same indifference he always had. It irritated me, more so now I knew who he really was.

"You lead the mob, you own the people," I whispered, hugging a pillow for comfort. "God, it all makes sense. The conniving, manipulative, boorish attitude, the fear you instill on everyone who knew you, and how you found me point blank."

"I didn't," Mingi denied. "Wooyoung found you. He called me. He is a brother of mine."

"You lied to me," I growled. "You lied about everything, you bastard-- don't come any closer."

Mingi began walking towards me, but paused in the middle of the room when I told him to stop. "I asked if you were in the mob," I continued. "You said no. But not only that, hid the fact that you had power. All you ever did was lie."

Mingi narrowed his eyes on me, rage slowly building into them, then it was gone. His self-control had always been worth of applause. "I never lied to you," he said in annoyance. "Everything I told you has been the damn truth from the start, Y/N."

"I own the gang, Y/N. I am the mafia, so no, I am not the mob," Mingi hissed. "I gave you every opportunity to wiggle your way out, I never gave you opportunities--"

"Opportunities that you tailored to suit whatever you wanted?!" I interjected, my voice raising significantly. "As if I had any choice? You assaulted me, Mingi, you took advantage of any weakness I had and exploited it for your gain!"

He smirked, his true colours overtaking the gentleness he put on. "But I do, I do care for you," he remarked. "Your perceptiveness kills me, though. It's not my fault we crossed paths again."

"You were going to give me to the enemy when we were hiding at the station," I accused harshly. "Crossing paths wasn't the issue, you had no problem selling me out!"

"I wasn't going to," Mingi shook his head.

"You wanted to touch me, you were going to push me off to them--"

"Hongjoong and Seonghwa, you mean?" 

Mingi sighed, rubbing his temples with both of his hands. "Okay, fine, I might have lied to you with that one," he shrugged. "Joong is my best hunter, and Hwa is my right hand man."

Dread filled my body. Every opportunity that he gave me, even if he had pushed me to Hongjoong and Seonghwa, I would have never been in trouble. I would have ended up with Mingi, regardless.

"You snake," I seethed. "You manipulated me!"

"Remember," Mingi grinned sadistically. "I gave you the option to get away. Hongjoong would have let you go, he's always been soft, you see," he scoffed. "You chose to stay with me."

With that, tears fell from my eyes. Mingi's eyes softened at the sobs that wracked my body. He never lied, everything matched up, but his manipulations knew no bounds. Had I not been blinded by the temporary lust that made my body shake, I would have read between the lines.

"Seonghwa said he was going to kill you, how could I have known?" I hiccuped in between the sobs and tears.

I saw him reach out his hand to me, wanting to touch me, but hesitated when he saw how pitiful I looked. "Please don't cry, little dove," he whispered. "Will you calm down if I explain everything from the start?"

I looked up at him with my tear-stained eyes, nodding apprehensively. "Listen to me, my Y/N," he began. "I never lied to you, and I'm not lying when I say it hurts me to see you cry.

He walked towards the end of the bed and sat on it, far from me. "I was there for a deal with another mob, they screwed me over, so I stole their cash," he explained like it was no big deal. "The rope and the knife was theirs. It was for me."

I winced, the memory of Mingi tying me up making me cringe. "I'll spare you the details. I had to secure the place, why do you think the whole station was empty?"

I stared at him, and he stared back. That look again, I can't stand it. He was looking at me like I was the brightest star in the universe, but this time, I was slipping further and further away from him.

"I am a very thorough person, my pretty girl," he smiled at my blush.  "I could have sworn I blocked off every single entrance in there. So tell me, how the hell did you get in?"

My blush deepens, and I lower my head in embarrassment. "I-I saw there was a barricade," I stammered. "I, uhm, jumped over it. I was too tired to go the long way."

Mingi laughed, his deep voice reaching me in places I didn't know existed. "I see," he smirked.

How could I be so stupid? The deserted area should have been a massive sign that something was very wrong.

"The train that came after a little," he continued. "That was my getaway ride. Those two were probably pissed when I wasn't on it, especially Seonghwa."

I was mortified all of a sudden. I groaned and Mingi turned to look at me in amusement. Hongjoong and Seonghwa probably heard us going at it and doing vulgar things in a place where we weren't supposed  to be doing it.

"I didn't lie when I said I owed them money," he said, his tone soft and gentle. It was like we were in that train station all over again. It was moments like these when my heart would question itself and its validity.

"Yeah, you just conveniently forgot to mention that it was technically your money too," I mumbled in resentment.

"I got a little carried away with you and forgot to give it to them," he shrugged nonchalantly. "I don't know how, you drive me crazy."

"That doesn't give you the excuse to shackle me with you and manipulate me to do your bidding," I glared fiercely at him, my voice breaking with every emotion I had.

"I know, my love, I know," he sighed deeply, shifting uncomfortably on the bed and turning his whole body to face me. 

I wasn't going to tell him that I never stopped thinking about him even after he left, and I wasn't going to tell him that he had won - even if I didn't want to, I felt something for him. But I was mad, and he doesn't deserve me.

There wasn't a day where I never blamed myself for feeling the way I did. I really was no different than a whore.

"I didn't think I'd see you again after that night," he admitted.

I was puzzled and confused. "What do you mean?" I frowned. "I was in fear of you, Mingi. Everyday I was paranoid that you changed your mind and would come knocking at my door to take me."

He chuckled lightly. "No, dollface. I didn't even know where you lived."

I stared at him apprehensively. "There was no tracking in the car?" The doubt was clear on my face. "Don't you mafia people do that? GPs everything that moved?"

"You would be correct, but no," he shook his head. "Not that one. That was my personal car. Not the mob boss' car, just regular Song Mingi. It's not connected to the business."

"You're lying," I objected, my chest tightening with how my heart beated.

"How many times do I have to tell you?" Mingi sighed. "Call me whatever you want, a bastard, a son of a bitch, the devil incarnate. I may con my way and twist the truth, but Y/N, you should know by now that I am not a liar."

I swallowed the lump that blocked my throat from breathing in and out. "Not to you," Mingi confessed. "I care very deeply about you."

I couldn't help the shock that resonated onto my face and expression. "You really intended to give me that car?" I croaked. 

He nodded without hesitation. "Yes, love. Yes, I did."

Something in my chest exploded, all the emotions and how I felt threatening to bubble up within me. "I hate you," I whispered.

Mingi heard it though. "What?" he frowned.

I was very angry at this point. "Is this part of your games again, Song Mingi?" I spat, tossing the blankets away from my body.

"My love, please calm down," he pleaded.

"No!" I screeched, standing up and inching away from him and the bed. "I don't need your stupid car after you took advantage of me, you slimy little snake."

I began pulling my hair out in frustration. "You could have let me go," I cried out. "But instead, you didn't and you toyed with me and my body!"

"Y/N, stop it," he warned, standing up, himself, and trying to reach for me, but all it did was make me back away more.

"You think the car would absolve everything?" I seethed, making my way to the door, intending to leave. "You could have approached me like a normal person, I might have given you a chance to woo me--" 

I grabbed my arms and spun me around swiftly. "Mingi, let go--"

"You don't understand," Mingi hissed, his eyes had the mafia leader's anger in them, scaring me a little. "You don't get it all, Y/N."

"Mingi, please--"

"I had  every intention of letting you go that night," he snarled. "When I said I never thought I'd see you again, I meant it. I was really letting you go." 

"You asshole, I hate you!" I screamed in defiance.

Mingi scoffed. "Really?" he squinted his eyes at me and pulled me into him, embracing me. It effectively halted me, I wasn't expecting it.

"That car was yours," he whispered. "If you really detested me, you could have sold it and gotten rid of every trace of me."

"And have you kill me for doing so? I think not."

"I wouldn't have known. If it had GPS, I would have tracked it somewhere else."

I cursed under my breath. There was no fooling him. "I wish you sold it," he said. "You could have lived comfortably and I would have rested easy knowing you had enough money so you wouldn't work at night anymore."

I shivered when he tucked my hair behind my ears. "What if someone else got you first? What if they had worse intentions?"

"I want you," he continued when I didn't reply. "I wanted you for myself, to take you and do whatever I damn well pleased."

He tilted my chin gently, forcing me to look him in the eyes. "I wanted to fuck you that night. Hard. Fast. Rough."

That caught me off guard. My face heated up in response.

"But I couldn't," he sighed before I could fully internalize what he said. "I didn't want this life for you. There was too much danger around me..."

He touched my forehead before leaning in and giving the bandaged wound a peck. "I should have come sooner before they did this to you."

I realized that passion was often mistaken for aggression. Mingi had too much of both. "You didn't send Wooyoung to spy on me?" I asked.

Mingi shook his head. "Wooyoung working with you was a sheer coincidence."

"It's not too late, you can still let me go," I tried to convince him. "You can let me go, once and for all."

He shook his head, his hold on me tightening. "No," he flatly said. Desperation swam in his eyes. "I let you go once, and that month was my worst. You're mine now, you hear me?"

The way he looked at me, I was the brightest star in his universe, and he finally had caught up to me. Then Mingi let me go, his eyes darkening into something foreboding; something more sinister.

"Strip."

It took a moment for me to understand what he said, and when I did, my eyes widened. "W-What?"

His eyes never left mine. "You heard me," he said. "Take your clothes off."

I took a step back from him and Mingi's jaw hardened when he saw me. "What are you doing?" he clenched his teeth, his voice taut.

"Mingi, please," I pleaded.

"Please what?" he growled. "Take your fucking clothes off, Y/N. I'm going to fuck you."

My chest fell up and down with how rough my breathing became. Mingi's scowl deepened when he saw me not moving an inch. He proceeded to take his shirt off and throw it randomly somewhere.

I gulped, taking in his physique. I knew he was toned, but seeing him up close made my brain go haywire with want. My brows shot up as I stared at the tattoo I didn't know he had on his left chest. It was an 'A' in a circle - an anarchy symbol, or rather, the Ateez emblem.

"Are you going to hurt me?" I whimpered.

His eyes narrowed in irritation. "No. Come here," he ordered. He had a demanding presence. The suffocating domination he had on me was daunting, but I wasn't going to give in to him.

I stood frozen in my spot for a few more seconds before I backed up again. Mingi slowly crept up to me, he looked like a predator more than ever.  I backed up even faster until my back hit the wall. Panic surged through me when Mingi reached me.

He put his arms on either side of the wall, trapping me in. "Where are you going to go?" he sneered.

Before I could respond, Mingi ripped my nightgown off swiftly in the middle and lifted me easily in his arms, tossing me effortlessly on the bed. I screamed for dear life as he hovered over me.

"Song Mingi! What the fuck are you doing to her?!” I heard someone scream from outside the room.

"Fuck off!" Mingi roared angrily.

I trembled beneath him. He looked so much bigger than me when he was on top of me like this. I covered my bare breasts with my arms, but Mingi wasn't having it.

His eyes roamed hungrily over me. "No, babydoll," he smirked, grabbing my hands roughly and pinning them down on the bed. "You do not cover your tits around me, got it?"

I nodded as he devoured me with his eyes. I gasped when he leaned down and began sucking them. The stimulation was overwhelming - he would alternate between sucking and nipping my nipples gently.

"Mingi, please wait," I whimpered pathetically when he let go of one of my hands to fondle my tits.

I shook my head frantically and a choked cry was torn from my when  his other hand wrapped around my neck. He lifted his head up to glare at me.

"Stay still," he barked.

I felt his tongue lick my lips, trying to push them apart. I whined in reluctance, trying to turn my head away, but Mingi quickly let my neck go to the back of my head and tugged my hair roughly on his hands. I cried out and struggled when he bit my bottom lip.

I inhaled a deep breath sharply when he pulled away to stare at me as I shuddered. I tensed when he started leaning down again slowly. He let go of my hair to press a thumb on my jaw, smirking darkly as he forced my mouth open.

"You're so beautiful like this," he murmured. "Naked, shaking like a leaf, and all mine."

He ravaged my mouth once more, tugging on my hair a little bit. When I refused to cooperate, he murmured another warning against my mouth, this time with more threat. His tongue played with mine, and he groaned against me, and plunged his tongue deeper.

I felt my body trembling more, the wetness down there was becoming impossible to ignore at his touch, and I was aching for relief at this point.

Tears fell from my eyes at the roughness and tenderness he was making me feel, and I felt nothing but confusion. He wiped my tears away with his fingers.

"Don't cry," he whispered.

"C-Can we do this next time?" I begged.

His penetrating glare left me fumbling for words, and yet submissive to his touch, unsure if I should hate him for doing this, or liking it because it was him. 

I knew one thing, I felt undeniably safe with him.

"Darling, please, I'm not going to hurt you," Mingi pleaded when I began thrashing around, trying to get away from his criminal hold, by pushing his body towards me. "You want this just much as I do--"

"Fuck you," I spat on his face. Shock filled his face as he wiped the spit absentmindedly.

His eyes widened before mania and fury fueled his features. "Don't worry, I plan to."

I was expecting something rough and unrestrained, but no, Mingi kissed me softly, lovingly, and I couldn't help but kiss him back with equal emotions. His hands went everywhere - my hair, neck, stomach - until it reached its goal down there.

Panic surged through me and I tried to struggle, but he held my legs down with his and trapped me with his chest.

"Mingi," I wailed.

"Shut up," he hissed, ignoring my pleas.

Something about the way he said it made me extremely wet. It was such a dark arousal, too. Mingi groaned loudly, his fingers felt my damp pussy, rubbing and pressing on it. I bit my lips to stop the moans that were wanting to spill out of me.

"Baby," Mingi rumbled, pulling my bottom lip out of my mouth. "Do not, and I mean, do not hold back on me, yeah? I want to hear your pretty sounds..."

It's not like he gave me a choice, I let out a breathy moan when he slipped a finger in, pushing in deeper until he was knuckles deep. I unconsciously squeezed around his finger and that made him even crazier.

"Oh sweetheart," he choked out. "You are incredibly tight, my angel."

He started stroking in and out, sliding with ease and finger fucked me faster and rougher than he did when he were at the train station.  I moaned when he curled his fingers up and started rubbing that sweet spot.

"M-Mingi," I moaned erotically. "P-Please, slow down for m-me."

He kissed my neck, his lips nipping at the soft flesh there. "How?" he groaned against my skin. "Do you not hear that?"

The loud, squelching sound from my wet pussy as he drilled his finger relentlessly in me was driving me crazy. I gasped when his pace got faster, his palms were hitting my clit aggressively and I felt my orgasm slowly approaching me.

"No," Mingi growled. I whined in protest when he pulled out. He grabbed my jaws roughly. "You won't come, not until I say so," he snarled.

He stood and quickly got rid of his pants, his hands shaking with anticipation as removed the last piece of clothing he had - his boxers.

I stopped and watched him stroking his already hard cock, and he looked directly at me, his eyes hazed with lust and madness, his strokes going slower when I swallowed. He wasn't the biggest I've been with, but he was the thickest. 

The length of it was veiny, the head of it red with the need to be inside me. I gulped when I realized that he was going to be inside me.

"Look how hard you make me, precious," his eyes were lethal and ferocious. "I'm sorry, but I can't take it anymore."

Before I could say anything, a startled cry left my lips when he mounted me, roughly pushing my thighs apart to let himself in for the invasion he was going to do.

"Mingi--oh!" I whined when he shoved his fingers back in my pussy and stroked in and out like the madman he was. I struggled repeatedly, thrashing my legs and kicking him as hard as I possibly could.

"Resistance is useless, stop it!" Mingi shouted, making me stop in my acts and stare at him dumbfounded.

He tiredly buried his head on the crook of my neck. "I will give you anything and everything you want and more," he whispered in distress and desperation. "Just please give in to me, baby, please ."

The way he was begging broke something in me. "It doesn't work like that," I sighed.

"Then don't hate me," was all he said before he pushed into me in one thrust of his hips, almost tearing me into two.

I choked out a loud moan as my nails dug into his back. "M-Mingi," I gasped in broken moans.

He stayed still inside me for what seemed like a lifetime, shushing me and whispering the gentlest of words into my ears as he gave me little kisses here and there.

I knew he was corrupting me, but the feel of him inside me sent stars in my vision. It was the corruption, the alternation, between him being rough and then into being the most affectionate man.

Mingi withdrew all of a sudden, then thrust deeply, both of us letting out pleasure filled moans that echoed all over the room.

"I'm going to have you now, okay?" he said.

Without waiting for my reply, he thrust into me hard, over and over and over again. I felt my body being filled delightfully, the sensation of Mingi's cock seemingly swallowing all the words I intended to hurl at him.

His thrusts quickened, each thrust making me cry out loud and moaning louder and louder, not caring if anybody heard me from outside.

"Oh, fuck, my love," Mingi groaned, looking me directly in the eyes as he hovered over me. "You feel so fucking good."

He leaned down to kiss me roughly. "You're all mine, okay? You're fucking mine."

It was the moment when I knew that I couldn't hold back anymore. No matter how hard I tried to deny it, maybe I was his, after all. It was fucked up, but goddamn it, I wanted him.

"I'm all yours," I cried out. "Please, please fuck me--ngh!" 

He groaned at my sudden surrender to him, reaching down with one hand to rub my clit as he fast as he was fucking into me. He locked his lips into mine in a demanding kiss.

"Your pussy feels so fucking good," his deep voice bought out a different type of pleasure in me. "Wrap your legs around me, my love."

I obeyed him without questions, moaning his name out loud when he reached even deeper than before. He buried his face in my neck as he fucked faster, harder, and deeper.

"Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck..."

"You want me to go harder, baby?"

"Yes! "Well, you better start begging."

“Please, Mingi, please…”

His cock filled my pussy harder until I felt the tip touch the end of my walls. In a moment of complete bliss, I grabbed his face and locked eyes with him. The surprise in his eyes made him buck his hips roughly. "Is my angel a slut, after all?" he smirked.

My body shuddered against him, and I felt a pleasure that intensified with the degrading name - slut.

"I love you," he whispered abruptly. 

The sincerity in his eyes made my chest tighten and explode. "Since when?" I croaked out.

"I don't know," he smiled through the pleasure he felt. "I just do."

It was a feeling I knew all too well, as I felt the same.

A surge of bravery passed through me, maybe it was all from the payback and I want to get even. "Prove it," I smirked.

"Oh, you're going to be the death of me," he growled.

I screamed his name over and over again as he fucked his desires into me, until a strangled groan from him made his thrusts more desperate and sloppier. 

His moans were getting higher and higher in pitch until he was nothing more than a whining, moaning mess. It turned me on to the highest degree.

"Come with me, love, please," he begged. "I need it..."

It was all I needed to hear, and there was no turning back. He broke an orgasm out of me, stripping me of any plans to defy him ever again.

His groans of pleasure matched his slowing thrusts and with a final plunge forward, hot cum filled began filling me. The little kisses he planted all over my face while whispering the dirtiest things with the most affectionate tone gave me the shivers.

He laid on top of me tiredly, and I was expecting him to stay like that because we were both tired and spent, but no. "Mingi?" I asked in confusion. 

I was confused, I whined when he pulled out, going down on me to stare at my swollen pussy. It was so embarrassing, him being so close and personal down there.

"W-What are you doing?" I moaned again when I felt his fingers push back his cum back inside me.

"Can't let all of this go to waste, yes?" he smirked before diving in.

I almost had another orgasm at the sight. I felt Mingi eat me out hurriedly, holding my legs so I don't shut them close. The slurping sounds were so obscene.

Suddenly, he stopped and got back on top of me with the cockiest smirk on his face. He leaned down, forcefully opened my mouth, then opened his.

"Mmph!" I groaned lewdly, wide-eyed, but suddenly wet all over again.

I felt something wet, sticky, go in my mouth when Mingi kissed me - cum. He had just sucked his own cum from my pussy, and spit it out in my mouth.

"That's a good girl," he smirked, wiping his mouth with his hands. "Take it all in for me..."

He leans back at me again and I expectedly open my mouth for him again.  His cum dribbled slowly from his mouth to mine and we both groaned at the erotic sight. "Swallow," he said.

I savoured his taste and swallowed, just like he wanted to. He bit his lips at my lewdness. "You did not just do that," I was bewildered.

"And what if I did?" Mingi smirked.

We lay next to each other, not saying a word, and just taking in what transpired between the two of us. I lay on Mingi's chest, tracing the tattoo on his chest.

"What's it for?" I asked absentmindedly.

"That, my love, is a brand that we wear to prove our loyalty," he replied patiently, rubbing my arms up and down. "Hongjoong drew it, himself."

"Does everyone have them?"

"Yes," he hummed. "Yunho has his on his chest too, Wooyoung and San both have theirs on their thighs. Hongjoong on his right wrist, Seonghwa on the left, Jongho on his arm, Yeosang on his back."

"I see," I replied lazily, laying back on his chest and just staying there. It wasn't awkward at all, I just felt relaxed with Mingi like this.

"You didn't reply to me earlier," Mingi's deep voice accused.

"With what?" I frowned, not even bothering to open my eyes.

"I told you I love you, I meant what I said," he sighed. "It wasn't a spur of the moment thing."

"But Mingi, this is only the second time we've seen each other, how can you love me?" I whispered, my tongue burning because I knew I was bullshitting myself with that.

"Don't be a hypocrite, precious," he chuckled. I huffed and he laughed. "You forget I'm the Don, I can see right through you."

"I don't know what you're talking about," I rolled my eyes playfully, turning away from him.

He grabbed me gently and gave me a quick kiss. I blushed when he kissed my nose. "Admit it," he pressed.

"Admit what?"

"That you're slowly falling in love with me," he grinned. "Just like I am with you, my queen."

I cursed under my breath. "Why do you keep calling me that?" I frowned, trying to divert the topic.

"I'll take that as a yes," he laughed. "You mean 'my queen'? So you get used to it since I want you by my side when I rule."

"Bold of you to assume I'll agree," I murmured.

"I mean, we already fucked each other's brains out, I'm just saying--"

"Mingi!"

We laughed out loud, and we laughed even harder when all we heard from outside the door were: 

'Ha! Woo, you fucking owe me $50, I told you they'll make up!'

'Yeah, but the bet was if they make up before fucking, San!'

'I don't give a fuck. Hwa, you owe me too!'

'Me?! That was Yeosang!'

"Boss!"

I was startled when Mingi suddenly covered my whole naked body with the blanket protectively. Somebody just came through the door without knocking.

"Choi Jongho," Mingi seethed, shaking in anger. "It better be good or I swear I will shoot you on the spot."

"Ah," I heard our lovely driver fumble by the door. "Well, Hongjoong saw somebody steal the car in the garage."

Mingi sighed loudly. "Which one?"

"The white one."

"Well, did they break your legs first?"

"What?"

"I said," Mingi inhaled sharply. "Did they break your legs first?"

I stroked Mingi's thighs to calm him down. Though it turned me on to see him mad - sue me, he was hot - I liked Jongho and I don't want to see him dead yet.

"No," Jongho replied.

"So go and fucking chase it down, then!" Mingi howled. "Did you really have to go to me for that? Get the hell out of my room, out!"

"Hey, this is my house!" I heard Yunho shout from a distance.

"That I gave you!" Mingi screamed back.

I couldn't stop the laughter that erupted from my throat. I suppose it wouldn't be too bad trying to get along with everyone and see where this journey takes us. When Jongho shut the door, I peeked out from the blanket to find Mingi already staring at me.

"So," Mingi cleared his throat. "What now?"

I attempted to stifle a grin, but I failed. "Luckily for you, I like having power as well."

"Good," he beamed. I was in awe, where was the rugged and brusque man I met on the train station?

He bought out documents from the bedside table and began writing on it. "I just have to write your name in the official document so the enemy does not touch you," he explained when he saw me look at him curiously.

"They're eventually going to find out about you," he continued. "You have an English name, love?"

"Why?" I asked.

"For overseas," he shrugged. "Our operations extend out there, believe it or not."

I looked at him apprehensively. When Mingi saw me hesitate, he spoke up. "We'll take it one step at a time, okay?" he tenderly said. "I know this is a lot of change, but I promise you, nobody will hurt you. Hurting you will equate to hurting me as well. Any family I should know of?"

My heart swelled incredibly so. I was scared, terrified even, but I had a good feeling about him and everything that will come next.

"No," I smiled sadly. "I'm an orphan. And it's Rinoa."

He stopped in his tracks and looked up to meet my eyes. "You're very strong," he said with a small smile. "You have me and the boys now, no more worrying alone, okay? Put down your college information too, I'll pay for it from now on."

My eyes widened. "You don't have to," I whispered. "I've been managing on my own for years now."

"I know, love, but part of being mine is letting me take care of you. Let me take this burden off of your shoulders, okay?"

I wanted to tear up. I was confused, but felt very happy. "I hope you don't let me down," I whispered. " Or I'm going to beat you up," I grinned afterwards.

Mingi grinned back, kissing my hands tenderly. "I promise I'll give you everything and make you happy, and I'm sorry for all the stuff I put you through."

"No more lies?" I pointed out.

Mingi shook his head. "No more lies."

"So what's your English name too?"

Mingi chuckled. "I won't lie," he smirked. "But I never said I won't ask for some sort of payment."

I rolled my eyes and kissed him on the cheeks. His eyes widened in response. "That was fast," he laughed. "Look at you already wanting to know things about myself."

"Glad to know you're still the cocky man I met," I laughed. "Would've been weird if you just suddenly changed."

I looked at him expectantly with a cheeky smile. He laughed out loud before responding. "It's Stellan.”

"It suits you," I commented. 

We stared at each other, just taking in the other person. Little by little, we'll get to each other, and it starts right here, and right now. "Come here," he began

He lifted me up to put me on his lap so I could straddle him and pulled me towards him until our lips danced in a game of truce.

I fell into his rhythm naturally as his arms wrapped around me and held me lovingly. I had found my lover with Mingi, and I had fallen in love with him.

[slttygeto]

WHISPERED PROMISES—S. SHINICHIRO

જ⁀➴ synopsis: you meet shinichiro one day when he’s working in his shop. you’re sweet, nice and there’s an obvious tension between you two. you feel like a teenager with the way he’s making you nervous, but you accept to go on a date with him. things only get better from there.

જ⁀➴ content warning: so much fluff i almost cried, fem!reader, you and shin have the biggest crush on each other, he’s so sweet and respectful, eventual smut, mentions of a breeding kink, protected sex, fingering, oral (fem! receiving), pussy whipped shinichiro, dirty talk, lots of kisses, shin has a big dick<3 

જ⁀➴word count: 7,9k (lord have mercy)

જ⁀➴note: a great thank you to @mztoman  for commissioning me again!! I got so carried with this fic, the plot was just so good!! 

COMMISSIONS ARE STILL OPEN: 1 SLOT LEFT.

COMMENTS AND REBLOGS ARE MUCH APPRECIATED!

Working on weekends was Shinichiro’s least favorite thing about his job. He tried his best to make it a good experience, he really did, but he was tired from a long week of working eight hours a day (and sometimes more when there was an emergency). And so, small things got on his nerves.

His lunchbox wouldn’t open, he forgot to pack chopsticks with him, he forgot to put water in his mini-fridge, the air conditioner was barely working—good lord, he was getting so annoyed.

Ring!

Oh great, a customer visiting when he was at his wits ends. Shinichiro stands up from his crouching position next to the bike he was working on. He grabs the rug that was attached to his pants and wipes his hands. He was expecting the usual type of customers; rude, stubborn, the know-it-all who tried to explain to him his own job and how it’s done. All in all, unlikeable.

Though, he is pleasantly surprised when he finds a girl standing at the door, looking around his shop with heart eyes. You looked so lost in your thoughts, your hands gripping your hand bag so tightly (from nervousness? Shinichiro wasn’t sure). Your stance was polite, and you looked in awe at his work. Maybe working today wasn’t such a bad idea if his first customer of the day is someone like you.

He brushes off the thoughts, telling himself that you looked young—no, way too young for someone like him. Plus, he wasn’t exactly the luckiest with girls. He’s had his fair share of hookups, tried to be in relationships, but things just never worked out for him.

He rolls his shoulders as he approaches you, greeting you with a wave. He was tall, had a smile that had you feeling a little dizzy—good god, this man was attractive. Whether it be the way he carried himself, or how he wiped the dirt off his hands, you could tell that he was hardworking and truly loved his job.

“Hi, welcome to our shop.” He really hoped that his voice wouldn’t crack and embarrass him. Technically, it was his shop and he was proud of it. It wasn’t exactly the fanciest out there, but it was his pride and joy. The display of the many bikes that he owned always caught people’s attention outside and left him grinning from ear to ear.

“Hello, thank you, I didn’t think anyone was here,” you were nervous, he could tell by watching you relax and clench your hands more than once.

“Well, someone has to be here,” he jokes and for a second, he can tell you were glad that he did. His playful remark somehow made you relax, and you let out a slightly less nervous giggle (which sounded so fucking adorable).

“You’re right, my bad.” You start looking around the shop again, and the man thinks it’s time to try to get to know you a little better. How can he do that without appearing to be invading your personal space? Should he immediately ask for your name? No, that’s too bold. Maybe…Maybe taking the professional approach will work.

“Can I see your driver’s license?” Very subtle.

You don’t hesitate as you pull it out and hand it to the tall man, and you watch as his eyes scan it for a good five seconds before humming in approval.

You were indeed younger, but only four years younger than him, really fucking attractive. He thought that there is no way you were single, but then again there was no ring on your finger—should he just ask you if you were in a relationship? Nu-uh, too soon.

“Alright, and how can I help you?”

“I am here to fix my friend’s bike for her birthday,”

“Oh you have a biker friend? So you know a little about them?”

“Only the basics, I’m more of an avid fan of the races rather than a participator.” You let out a chuckle, rubbing the back of your neck. You weren’t lying, you did enjoy watching more than riding them. But only because you tried before and failed miserably, and you weren’t going to include such embarrassing detail to a handsome stranger.

“Okay, what does she need help with exactly?”

You go into detail of what had happened, and how your friend had stopped riding her motorcycle just because she was too busy saving up money for something else. And with her birthday coming up, you thought you could sneakily get a family member of hers to bring the bike to this particular shop and get it fixed right on time. Shinichiro agrees to help you, and you both settle on the price rather quickly. Now you no longer had a reason to be in the shop, but you didn’t exactly want to leave either.

“You’re not busy?”

“Not at all,” you look at the display of the many fancy motorcycles he owned, letting out a “wow” at how shiny and pretty they looked. He took good care of them.

“My name is Shinichiro, by the way.” He takes his hand out to shake yours and you accept it immediately. You try not to blush at how rough his hand felt, evidence of true hard work. Could he get any more attractive?

“Nice to meet you, Shinichiro,” you grin at the man, and feel him squeeze your hand tightly before relaxing. He seemed like he wanted to say something, but hesitated and thought ‘nevermind’. But the longer you stayed in his shop, the more obvious it was to the man that if you left the shop without his number, he would be the one to call himself a loser. No need for Benkei and Wakasa to do that for him.

“So, uh…” His lips part, his hand comes to the back of his neck and your heart picks up its pace. You could see that the tips of his ears were turning red, and his hand hadn’t let go of yours. “This is a little unprofessional of me…” He mumbles to himself. He sighs and you chuckle and at the dilemma he seems to be in, but that sound alone seems to encourage him to speak more. He wants to hear you laugh again, you seemed very comfortable with what was happening.

“Would you like to go out sometime? I’d like to know you better, you seem like a really nice girl and—“

“Absolutely.” You don’t let him go on with his little ramble, only flash him a nervous grin. The apples of your cheeks were as red as his, and it truly felt like two teenagers confessing to one another. You loved a man that made you feel like this.

“Oh?” He grins back, and his hand slides down from his nape to the back pocket of his jeans. “Great, when are you available?”

“Tomorrow, my place.” Shinichiro almost chokes on his saliva at your words. Your place? It was too early for that, not that he minded—but he wanted to be a gentleman, wait at least a few dates before even trying to get in bed with you—

Sensing that he was malfunctioning, your other hand slides on top of the hand that was holding yours and you squeeze it in reassurance.

“You don’t have to if you’re not comfortable. I just thought going to a restaurant would be a waste of money—and personally, I love cooking. We can just watch a movie and hang out?” You felt like such a breath of fresh air. Somehow, feeling your skin against his made him immediately relax.

It’s not the idea of coming to your place that scared him, he just always thought you only do that after a while of dating. But here you were, suggesting that an indoor date would be better and cheaper than at a restaurant. Plus, he felt like he could get to know you better if you’re sitting on the couch together alone rather than in a place filled with people.

“I love the idea. So, tomorrow?”

“8PM, how does that sound?”

“Perfect.”

--

After exchanging phone numbers, you and Shinichiro practically texted almost all night. You talked about everything and nothing, almost forgetting to send him your location. Turns out, you didn’t really live that far away from his own place, nearly less than a five minute walk.

He was really nervous. He didn’t tell anyone about the date, made up some bullshit of a lie that he was going out for a few hours and his friends were already eyeing him weird. He simply wanted to take his time with you. Your chemistry seemed promising even though you’ve known each other for less than a day.

He didn’t want to get his hopes up, and if you were going to choose not to go out on a date with him again, he could at least keep it a secret to himself.

Since you were the one cooking tonight, Shinichiro thought it would be rude if he didn’t bring anything with him. So he got a bouquet, brought board games with him and some drinks just in case. He felt stupid for not having asked you beforehand what kind of drinks you liked, but he was almost at your place. No time for regrets.

You had also told him to dress comfortably. You were going to chill in your living room for a while, and you wanted your date to feel as natural as possible. So here he was, dressed in a white hoodie and some grey sweatpants, his hair was still slightly wet from the quick shower he took after getting off work, and he hoped that he wouldn’t catch a cold.

Arriving at your doorstep, the man was more than sure that this was your place. You had a cute doormat with the word ‘WELCOME’ written in bold, along with two huge plants on either side of it. If your doorstep felt this cozy, he could only imagine what the inside looks like.

Knock, knock, knock.

He waits approximately three seconds before he hears the sound of you running barefoot to the doorstep, a muffled “I’m coming!” accompanied with it. You handle a few locks before opening the door, greeting him with the cutest smile he’s ever seen. He doesn’t have time to look at your outfit or tell you how nice you look before you were wrapping your arms around him. You don’t squeeze too tight, but Shinichiro feels you flinch and pull away.

“Oh, sorry! I got too excited—“ you’re blushing—fuck, you’re blushing and he’s getting butterflies in his stomach like a teenager. Shinichiro has been on enough dates to know the difference between feeling nervous and having an absolute crush on his date—it was the latter with you.

“It’s okay, I like hugs,” he places the bag full of goods on the floor and pulls you in another hug, his hand caressing your back gently. He hopes you can’t hear how loud his heart is beating, because then he would be fucked.

“You smell really good,” you mumble against his chest and you feel him hum. He leans down and you can feel his nose on top of your head—this was too intimate for a first date, but neither of you minded.

“You smell like roses,” he lets you pull away from the hug, grinning from ear to ear that his words were getting you to blush this hard.

“Thank you.” So shy, so sweet--

I swear if this doesn’t work out, I’ll never date again.

“Oh how rude of me, please come on in!” You lead him all the way inside, and Shinichiro can finally take a look at your outfit. You were wearing the cutest dress that reached right above your knees, along with a pair of fuzzy socks. You looked so comfortable and adorable, he couldn’t help the smile on his lips.

“Quite the cute outfit,” his tone is playful, it makes you pause what you were doing in the kitchen to give him a playful glare yourself.

“Yeah, yeah, I told you I wanted us to feel comfortable. It’s bad enough that my heart is about to explode,” so it wasn’t just him feeling nervous, cool.

“You’re also nervous?”

“Also?” now it’s your turn to sound playful and the man laughs at your antics. He takes a seat on your couch, and waits for you to join him. He looks around your apartment, and takes in how well thought everything seemed to be. From the candles sitting by the tiny coffee table, to the polaroids hanging on the wall—your place felt like a perfect representation of how you were as a person and as a friend; comforting and sweet.

“You got me my favorite drink!” Your excited voice pulls him out of his thoughts. He stares at you and the way your eyes seem to light up at a simple drink. He picked out the flavor very randomly, his thought process was ‘I hope she likes this’ and turns out, you did.

Lucky him. Everything he seemed to do or pick for you aligned perfectly with your preferences. Though, he couldn’t deny that he was eager to learn more about you; what you did for a living, what your favorite pet was, your sleeping schedule, your favorite place to eat—he needed to stop.

You approached the TV and grabbed your remote control before turning around to face him.

“Food is almost ready, wanna watch something in the mean time?” Shinichiro nods and you quickly take a seat next to him on the couch.

“So, what kind of shows are you into?”

The next half hour passes by rather quickly, and you end up not watching anything as you both chat on the couch. He helps you check in on the food when you gasp in horror, thinking that it got burned—but thank god, it didn’t. You talk about your childhood, what you did for a living and how things were going for you. If you had any friends living nearby, where you grew up. You appreciated how attentive the dark haired male sitting on your kitchen stool was, your heart skipped a beat every time he flashed you an adorable grin. You were absolutely doomed.

“How about you though, any friends or family living around you?” You ask as you start serving the pasta on the plates he helped setting on the table. He hums in response, but you think it was directed towards the food and how delicious it looked.

“I have two siblings, a brother and a sister.”

“Younger?”

“Yeah, how did you know?” he quirks an eyebrow at you and you shrug your shoulders.

“You give off oldest brother vibes,”

“In a good way I hope,” he teases, waiting for you to take a seat facing him.

“An amazing way, you seem very caring and selfless.” You light up the candle sitting in the middle of the table, and Shinichiro tries his best not to stare for too long when you stand up to do it. You were leaning down, the light coming from the candle made you look ten times prettier tonight.

Well, fuck me.

You catch him staring at you, the taller guy almost cooing at how you seemed to blush at his attention. A shy ‘what?’ leaves your lips and Shinichiro shakes his head in response.

“Just—you look so pretty,” he was being honest. He wasn’t trying to scare you away or seem creepy, Shinichiro was just an honest man.

“Oh please—have you seen yourself? You’re so handsome, it should be illegal!”

“Not gonna lie, I am handsome,” you stare at him in disbelief, before breaking into a laugh.

“What? My parents were very beautiful people,”

“Oh, I’m not saying otherwise. It just caught me off guard,” you giggled, grabbing your fork to eat your spaghetti.

“Plus, I look like my mom. It’s my biggest flex,” you notice how he smiles when he mentions his mom, and realize that he used the past tense when referring to his parents. Should you ask him about them or not?

“Were they nice people?” you were thankful that he caught on who you were referring to, and gave you a nod.

“The best.”

--

Dinner went on very smoothly with you two chatting here and there. There seemed to be no hole in your conversations, and when it suddenly got quiet, you’d immediately fill it with a new topic. Talking to him was just so fun.

He helps you clean the dishes (despite you saying he doesn’t have to) and you learn from standing next to him without your shoes on that he was a rather tall man. His stature was incredibly attractive even with a hoodie on, and he seemed to love dancing while washing the dishes.

“Oh did I tell you I have a niece?” you gasp at the revelation, almost dropping the board game he brought with him.

“You do? Show me!” he immediately whips out his phone and shows you the folder he has dedicated to pictures of him and his niece. He has approximately 500 pictures of her and she’s the sweetest girl ever.

She looks exactly like him, you almost think that he’s lying to you about being her uncle. You can definitely tell that she got her blond hair from her mom (you passed by a few pictures of the little girl with her parents), but she definitely looked like uncle’s favorite girl.

He tells you about her, how she brought some joy to his life a year ago when she was born. You listen to him and admire how his eyes are full of love when speaking of her—this man was the greenest flag you’ve ever met.

“I’d love for you to meet her, y’know if we see each other again,” he hesitates as he says the last sentence, but your hand is immediately wrapped around his arm before you squeeze it reassuringly.

“I would love to meet her,” even if you didn’t explicitly say it, you were hinting that you were looking forward to your next date together. Lucky Shinichiro.

The rest of the night is filled with laughter as you try all the board games he brought with him. Even when you got bored and decided to do something else, the man was down for whatever as long as it meant making you smile and giggle until your stomach was hurting. He loved how you seemed to encourage him whenever he doubted himself, he also noticed that your hand would always land on his back in reassurance when he lost (mostly to tease him, but you still loved feeling his muscular back through the fabric of his hoodie).

It was around 11:30PM when Shin finally decided it was time to head back home, and he had to fight the urge to kiss your lips when you sulked at the realization that it was time for him to leave.

“Man, that was too fast,” you complain as you both walk towards the door, and he chuckles at how whiny you suddenly got.

“Hey, it’s not like we won’t see each other again, yeah?” his hand landed on your back to reassure you the same way you did when he lost, and he noticed how you seemed to melt at his touch.

“Yeah,” you reply in a small voice, shy and suddenly too aware of your loud heartbeat.

Was he going to give you a hug? Kiss you? You were honestly hoping for a kiss, maybe a quick peck?

You were thinking too much.

“Thank you for tonight, I really had so much fun with you,” his hand rested at your shoulder, and you almost melted when he squeezed it. His hand was big and warm, you couldn’t stop thinking of how nice it would feel if you held it, kissed the skin or maybe traced the scars on it.

“I had so much fun too,” you reply, your hand instinctively wrapping itself around his wrist. Your thumb caresses the skin there, and while your heart was telling you that this was the right thing to do, your brain was scolding you for being so forward.

Shinichiro could swear that his heart was about to come out of his throat when your hand wrapped around his wrist. Your warm touch and caring nature had the man feeling dizzy, blushing once again like he’s never felt a woman’s touch before.

“Goodnight,” he pulls you towards him to hug you, grabbing both your arms to wrap them around his waist. This doesn’t necessarily catch you off guard since your brain had been screaming at you to wait for him to do something.

“Goodnight Shinichiro,” your head rests on his chest, a smile adorning your lips. You pull away from the hug a few seconds later, and wait for him to put on his shoes before opening the door for him.

“Text me when you get home,” you say in a low voice, trying not to disturb the neighbors and he nods.

“I will, bye!”

“Bye!” you wave at him, watching his back as he slowly walks away from your apartment. You close the door and stand there for a moment, trying to recollect your thoughts. This was by far one of the best first dates you’ve been on. Not only was Shinichiro such a sweetheart, but you had so much fun with him. You felt like you could hang out with him forever, you couldn’t wait for your next date together—fuck, perhaps you were rushing things? Maybe he wanted to wait a couple of days before calling you again, or maybe he won’t call you at all—

Knock! Knock! Knock!

Your heart stills at the sound, you almost grab your phone to call the police. But something tells you to open the door anyway, and when you do, two warm hands are grabbing your face and pulling you out of your apartment.

Shinichiro?

“What are you—“

“I wanna kiss you—can I kiss you?” he looks out of breath and his cheeks are pink. You’re not sure if it’s because of the fact that he ran, or if he was flustered. But either way, your cheeks are the same color as his when you hear his request.

“Kiss me, please.”

That was all what he needed to hear before pressing his lips against yours. His lips are warm and soft, and he kisses you so passionately that you can feel your head spinning. Your hands are balled up in fists, tightly holding onto the fabric of his hoodie to keep him closer to you. Shinichiro’s bigger frame is obvious when he kisses you, his entire form leans over you and it makes you blush even more.

Your lips move together for a few more moments before you’re both pulling away, the taller male still pressing kisses all over your face before pecking you on the lips one last time.

“Goodnight,” he says one last time, pressing a kiss to the corner of your lips before walking away from your apartment.

You close the door once again, and for a moment you feel like a main character in a romance drama. You lean your weight against the wall and feel your burning cheeks with your hands.

“Oh… my god,”

Shinichiro was going to be all you could think of for the next few days.

---

After your first date together, you and Shinichiro went on four more dates. Each one had a different vibe to it; at the fair, at a café, another date at your place and the most recent one was a cute lunch date at his bike shop. He fixed your friend’s bike but you also preferred being alone with him rather than outside with a crowd of people. Not that you didn’t appreciate the dates at the fair and the café, you were still feeling giddy from knowing each other, and so it felt more intimate to spend time together like this.

Shinichiro hadn’t asked you to be his girlfriend yet, and you were more than okay with it. You could tell he was waiting for the right moment to do it, it was adorable. There were times where it would get quiet between you two and you would find him staring at you so lovingly, it made your heart stutter in your chest.

He was about to come pick you up from your place very soon, and you remember him telling you to wear something comfortable which intrigued you. Where was he taking you exactly?

Soon after, you heard familiar three knocks at your door and almost jumped from the couch. You were so excited to see him, the part of your brain that usually embarrassed you for being so excited for a date was buried somewhere—this was Shinichiro, the same man who hugged and kissed you so passionately on your first date, held your hand at the fair and pecked your lips after winning a teddy bear for you. He got you food when you told him you were too tired to cook, and cleaned your kitchen despite you telling him he didn’t have to.

And he still hasn’t asked you to be his girlfriend yet.

You brushed off the negativity aside, trying to tell yourself that the pit in your stomach was from excitement and not disappointment. He’s been so good to you, just because he was taking too long to make things official didn’t mean he was playing you.

You hoped.

You open the door and is greeted with a good looking Shinichiro. It was dark outside, it was 9PM and so the street light made him look extra attractive.

He always looked good, but this time—wow. He was wearing a leather jacket with some jeans and a white shirt, and he had his helmet in one hand and a bouquet of flowers in the other. You tried your best not to blush at the sight of his hair slicked back, but you were so used to turning red in his presence that you just let it happen.

“Well hello there handsome,” you try to tease him, hoping that it makes your blush die down and give you a hint of confidence, but it withers away so fast when he places his helmet on the floor and pulls you into a hug. He smells so fucking good, it should be unfair.

“Hi pretty, ready for our date?” He pulls away from the hug to stare at your outfit and hums when he sees that you’re wearing shorts and a cardigan. “You look adorable.” He leans in and presses a kiss to your red cheek, and chuckles when you look down shyly.

“Thank you,”

“Still shy?” He teases, handing you the bouquet which you hold carefully.

“Shut up, it’s not my fault,” you walk back inside your place and Shinichiro waits for you by the door with his helmet. You put the bouquet of flowers in a vase and fill it with water before putting it on your table. This way, it always felt like a part of him was around you.

“It’s cute,” he flashes you a smile and you have to look away to try to calm your nerves. Making you feel this nervous should be illegal. Did he cast some spell on you?

“Anyway big boy, where are we going?” you walk out of your apartment and close the door, and when you turn around to face the taller guy, he places his helmet on your head and helps adjusting it so that it doesn’t fall off.

“I’m taking you somewhere, do you trust me?” He points at his motorcycle waiting for you both in front of your building and your lips part in awe. He was taking you for a ride on his most treasured possession?

“I do,” he sees that you’re in deep thought and squeezes your shoulder.

“Then let’s go.”

He gets on top of his bike and helps you sit behind him, and at first you hesitate on where to put your hands—until you feel him wrap your arms around his waist and tug you to press your chest on his back.

“Hold on tight, okay?” You could swear he was doing it on purpose, but you don’t think much of it when he’s suddenly speeding away from your apartment building.

It takes you ten minutes to get to your destination, with Shinichiro showing off his skills and laughing when you scream in horror when you get too close to car. You never thought that he would drive so…recklessly, but it was fun. He parks his motorcycle very close to where you were both standing, facing a small lake that you always passed by when going to work. It had pretty cherry trees, and people always took their dogs out on walks or walked with their partners here.

“I love this place,” you whisper, standing close to Shinichiro who chuckles at your words. He knows, you mentioned it before when you were having lunch together.

“I know, you always stare at it when we drive past it,”

He noticed. You almost coo at this, and stare up at the tall man through your eyelashes. Your arms instinctively wrap around his waist and he pulls you closer to him, resting your head on his chest.

“You like it?”

“I love it,” you pull away from the hug to rest your chin on his chest, staring up at him with the same eyes that always had the man weak in the knees. His hand caresses the top of your head as he stares down at you, and it slowly slips from the top to the back of your head.

“If you keep staring at me like that, I might just kiss you,” although there was a hint of sarcasm in his voice, you could tell he was being serious. And who were you to deny a kiss from him?

“Kiss me, Shin,” the man doesn’t need to be told twice before he’s leaning down to kiss you. You sigh in the kiss, his hands hold your face so gently that it makes you melt into his touch.

When you both pull away, you’re glad that it was dark outside or your faces would’ve given away how flustered you were. He can still tell from your warm cheeks that you were blushing and leans down to give you a quick peck.

“Can I be your boyfriend?” This man was too much for your heart to handle. You thought he was attractive, well-mannered and a gentleman—but this really takes the cake.

You’re excited, giddy that you could finally make things official with him. You’ve been waiting for this day since your first date—and it finally happened.

“Gladly.”

You and Shinichiro were officially girlfriend and boyfriend.

---

Today, you were going to meet Shinichiro’s niece. His sister had asked him if he could babysit her and he agreed, asking her if you could tag along which she agreed to. She wanted to meet you, and you weren’t opposed to the idea. Emma seemed very sweet from the many times Shin mentioned her, and so meeting her didn’t stress you out that much.

You got to Emma and Draken’s place at 5PM, they wanted to go on a date (which was well deserved) and so asking Shinichiro to babysit her seemed like the best option since the baby was in love with him. You greet the couple with a smile, and you watch as Emma shows Shinichiro where the bottles and diapers are, and what to do in case she cried—which he knew about already. His sister was just anxious, and probably felt a little too guilty to be taking some time away from her little girl.

“Have fun!”

Now it was just you, Shin and the little girl. For a one year old, she sure had a lot of personality. And you think that she definitely got it from her uncle. She giggles at everything he does and loves to sit on his lap, but when she noticed you sitting on the couch, her eyes lit up. She was intrigued, and she rarely ever met a new person.

You weren’t a familiar face, but she didn’t cry when you asked Shin if you could hold her. She gladly let you take her in your arms and even giggled and buried her face in your chest when you flashed her a small smile. What an angel.

“Oh are you getting shy on me?” You stand up from the couch with her in your arms and walk to the kitchen to get her one of the snacks her mother had prepared for her. You held her in one arm while the free one grabbed her chair to sit her there.

Shinichiro watched the scene unfold and could feel his body tense up. Whatever it was that had him feeling this… dizzy, he needed to brush it off. You were so good with his niece, so gentle and caring—you talked to her with so much tender and his niece seemed to love you; a complete stranger she just met. You treated her like she was your own baby, changed her diaper and helped getting her to bed, you even gave her a bath and Shinichiro could only imagine what it would be like to have a baby with you.

Watching you walk around your shared apartment with a belly full of his baby, so sore and whiny. You would cuddle up against him and he would feel the baby kick, you would place his hand on your stomach and he would caress the skin lovingly. You would be so needy and horny, grinding against his thigh and he would help you—his pretty little wife, bringing you to an earth shattering orgasm—

Shit, he was getting hard.

He was so relieved when Emma and Draken came back, their daughter was fast asleep and you both were cuddling on the couch. He didn’t realize how rushed his goodbyes were until he felt you tagging at his sleeve in front of the car.

“Shin? Are you okay?” You were worried, his pretty angel so concerned for him, so unaware that the thought of breeding you was all over his mind. He didn’t want to scare you away, but he thought since you’ve already made it official and made out a couple of times, he could tell you what was on his mind.

“Can you come over?”

“To your place?” You tilt your head to the side and Shinichiro nods.

“Spend the night, I need you.”

He needs you.

You felt yourself get dizzy at his words, lips parted in shock. You weren’t taken aback by the fact that he was horny for you, but saying it out loud and sounding so…desperate, you could feel your panties getting embarrassingly wet.

“I’ll give you my hoodie, I can go to your place and get you some clothes I just—“ He knew he was rambling, but he didn’t want you to think that he only cared about his pleasure, not when he knew the night was going to be all about you.

“Shin,” you cut him off, and the man stares down at you. “I need you too, please,”

---

Once at Shinichiro’s place, you didn’t have time to take off your jacket before he was pushing you up against the wall and kissing you so feverishly. You don’t know what set him off, but you weren’t opposed to it. His hands were helping you rid yourself of your jacket before slipping behind your thighs to grip the skin.

He pulls away from the kiss and presses his forehead against yours, panting and already so out of breath.

“If you feel uncomfortable or want me to stop, tap my arm, okay?”

So cute. Your response was a moan before you were kissing him again, this time trying to deepen it more than before. Shin taps your butt and asks you to jump, and when you do he wraps your legs around his waist and starts heading towards his bedroom. He kisses you like he means it, and unlike other kisses you’ve shared before, this one has a hint of lust to it—it tastes different; needy, demanding, and you melt into it like butter.

You expect his room to be a little messy, but you’re pleasantly surprised when you see how tidy it is. It smelled of sandalwood and his perfume, bed neatly made. He throws you on top of it like you weigh nothing, and is immediately on top of you after stripping himself of his own jacket. He gets back to kissing you, this time you’re aware of what’s pressing against your thigh and you don’t mind at all—instead, you’re pushing him away from you to sit up on your elbows.

“Are you—“

“Shut up and help me take off my shirt,” Shin’s lips are sealed shut at your words, then he’s doing as told. He helps you take off your shirt and grunts at the sight of you in your bra. Your tits looked gorgeous. He leans down and presses a kiss to the skin below your collarbone, hands sliding up to your shorts to pull them down in on fast movement and you squeal.

“Shin!”

“You don’t mind me getting a little taste first, right?” A blush spreads across your cheeks but you shake your head almost frantically at his words. You wiggle yourself out of your shorts, giving him a little show by letting them hang to your ankle for a moment before throwing them somewhere in his room. You giggle when he leans in and presses a kiss to your calf, but it turns into a moan when he licks all the way up to your inner thigh.

“You wanna tease me, is that it?” His mouth leaves wet kisses all over your inner thighs, before finally getting to your panties. He is shameless as he takes a whiff of your arousal through the damp fabric, and you almost kick him away because of how embarrassing it looks.

“You smell—fucking heavenly, “ he practically moans out the last part, and it makes a shy sound erupt from the back of your throat, looking away from him. But he’s having none of that—not tonight. He wanted you to look him dead in the eyes as he fucked every thought out of your head, wanted to feel you clamp around his dick as he brought you to a mind spinning orgasm.

You gasp when you feel him remove your panties in one swift motion, not even stuttering and hesitating as he balls them up and puts them in his pocket. You couldn’t even ask him what he was going to do with them before he was leaning down and spreading your pussy lips with a breathy moan. He looked so gone and he hasn’t even touched you yet, the sight of him looking so in love with your pussy made your clit throb—which made him audibly grunt.

“You’re a treat,” you don’t respond verbally—you can’t since he immediately wraps his lips around your clit and sucks. You inhale sharply at the contact, back arching and jaw going slack when he proceeds to pull away and flatten his tongue on the sensitive bud. Your eyes are rolled to the back of your head when he repeats the same movements—sucks, pulls away, kisses and then licks. It seems like a simple formula, and you can feel yourself getting louder and wetter but you have no care in the world. He’s eating you out so good, he’s showing no signs of stopping and you don’t want him to. Plus, whatever turned him on tonight must’ve made him feral if he was all over you like a mad man.

“Shin—oh fuck, oh baby,” you’re out of breath, your hands are flailing around trying to find where to grip. Until you feel the man between your legs grab your hand and placed them on top of his head. He wanted you to pull his hair, Jesus fuck.

You don’t have time to think properly, not that you can. You’re pulling at Shinichiro’s hair, hips bucking and stuttering with every strong lick on your clit. Your body is arching off the bed, and you sit up with a huff. Shinichiro can tell you’re about to cum when he pushed your body back down and slides in two fingers at a time. He looks up and has to hold himself back from cumming in his pants when he sees the blissed out look on your face—glossy eyes, bruised lips and red cheeks. You were a sight to see.

He helps you reach your orgasm with fast thrusts of his fingers, kissing the inner of your thigh and humming quietly about how well you were doing for him, how you were going to take his dick like a champ, how he can’t wait to stuff your cunt full of him and—

“Fuck!” You cry out, your body stuttering and shuddering as you finally get to cum. You ride out your orgasm by grinding your hips to the same rhythm as Shinichiro’s thrusts, and you whine at him when you can feel him kiss your clit, praising you for doing so well for him.

“My pretty girl, my gorgeous girl—you did so well,” he whispers and kisses your stomach, and you look down at him with lustful eyes and a fucked out expression, which he chuckles at.

Your eyes follow his every move as he gets up from between your legs and walks to his nightstand. He opens a drawer and grabs a condom, and you almost whine at him for that.

“Ah, baby. We gotta be careful,” he soothes you with a hand on your cheek, his thumb tracing circles on the skin before traveling down to your lips. He feels like a mad man when you open your mouth and take his thumb in, swirling your tongue around before gently biting it. What a fucking tease.

“Next time, you can do that to my cock, yeah?” He whispers to you and you nod, but your eyes are wide and blown out with lust as you stare down at the visible bulge in his pants. He chuckles at your stare, and gives you a little show as he takes off his shirt—flaunting the body that he has even if it wasn’t the fittest, he was proud of it.

Then he’s wiggling out of his pants, and grins when you reach your hand towards his boxers to palm his hard-on. He grabs your wrist and shakes his head, leaning down to press a kiss to the back of your hand.

“I said next time, hm?”

You don’t have time to pout about it before he’s taking off his boxers—and holy shit. He had your mouth watering, but your heart stutters and jumps in your chest at the thought of such a heavy cock inside of you. Shin watches as your expression changes and he chuckles, his cheeks reddening a little. For a man who was so full of confidence a few moments ago, seeing you look so in love with his cock made him feel a little proud.

“Next time when you go on the pill, I’ll fill you up so good,” he rips the condom with his mouth and swiftly places it on his dick, he watches as you eagerly spread your legs to welcome him between them and you nod at his words, even though you’re mainly focused on his cock.

“Yeah? You’d like that?” he lines up the tip with your entrance and you nod desperately, feeling yourself get even more turned on. “You’d like me to cum inside you, watch it leak out of you when we go for rounds?”

You’re a moaning mess by the time he slips it inside. You cling to his shoulders, face scrunched up in pleasure when you’re able to feel the sheer size of him inside you. Holy shit.

“Yeah baby, you won’t even have to work for it,” he adds, sounding out of breath. He pushes your legs up and shamelessly stares at how you’re taking his dick—your pussy swallows him back every time he tries to pull out, almost begs him to keep fucking you.

“Gonna give my pretty girl exactly what she wants—shit, gonna fuck her full of my cum,” your tummy is alive with butterflies at his words, and you stare up at the man who looks so focused on your pussy. Feeling your stare, Shinichiro locks eyes with you and chuckles. He’s all sweaty and fucked out himself, and the smile he flashes you when he starts to drill his cock into you is devilish.

He knew what he was doing, and you weren’t complaining about it. Your body feels on fire with every drive of is hips, fingernails digging into the skin of his back when he reaches that one spongy spot in your walls—you squeal, hands traveling down almost to push his hips away and that’s when he knows he found it and fuck—he starts to bully it.

You’re a sobbing mess, begging for absolutely nothing in particular but you keep chanting ‘please, please, please’ repeatedly, and Shincihiro has to lean down and kiss you. He soothes you with his lips, a heavy contrast to his mean thrusts. He’s fucking every thought out of your brain, and by the time you’re even able to come up with a coherent sentence, he pushes a single leg up on his shoulders—and your entire body seizes up.

You’re cumming hard around him, your jaw has gone slack and Shinichiro doesn’t stop. The bed shakes with every harsh thrust, and by the time you’re able to breathe again, you’re letting out a small scream at the intensity of your orgasm.

“Atta girl—fuuuuck, gonna make me cum,” he whines out the last part, his hands pinning your hips down to the mattress. You cry out from overstimulation, your pussy aching for him to slow down.

“Just a bit more baby, just a little—“ It only takes a few strokes for him to empty himself in the condom, reaching down to rest his forehead on your shoulder. You’re both a sweaty, panting mess, clinging onto each other as though you were one another’s life line. And even through heavy breaths, you kiss Shinichiro’s cheek, giggling when you see him smile.

“Are you okay?” He kisses your shoulder lovingly, letting his lips travel up to your neck where he feels you hum. You look down at him, letting your fingers brush the sweaty strands out of his face.

“Never been better,” Shinichiro grins at this, and he fixes himself until he’s able to kiss you properly on the lips. He makes it short and sweet, trying his best not to get carried away again because he knew you were definitely sore.

“Come on, you gotta get up and pee, darling.”

“And shower… I feel so sticky,” you make a face at the word sticky and the man above you chuckles at this.

“I like you like this, you smell like me.”

“Shin!”

2023 © all works belong to slttygeto. do not repost my work anywhere else.

[ghostsprettymama]

MONA LISA

"All the time in the world"

Warning: mommy/daddy kink,bondage,blindfolding,knifeplay,slight degrading,edging,mentionings of murder, gang violence, weed , guns. situationships. posessive sex. MDNI 18+

Pairing: gang member! Shuri x reader, childhood crush shuri x childhood crush reader! wlw, dom and sub. fuckbuddies.

Word count: 4,939 words 26,120 characters

ALL CHARACTERS ARE 18+ UNLESS STATED OTHERWISE

part one. part two

A/N: the chapters late due to some technical issues but i still hope you like it

---------------------------

(f/f) = favourite flower

(y/f/c) = your favourite color

xhosa translations -

Nkosazana - my girl.

umntwana wam - my baby

Le intombazana izoba kukufa kwam-This girl will be the death of me

----------------------------

Y/n Pov

She woke up with an aching headache, luckily it was the weekend. She turned on the tv taking her braids out letting her natural hair breathe.

soon she got up to washing n blow drying her hair, her mind full of thoughts. She styled her hair, cleaned up her room going back to rest in her room.

Damn. These two days were a lot she thought to herself running over the things that happened in two days. Am I just forgiving shuri for doing dumb shit to me? Im just letting her walk over me at this fucking point. you sighed, getting on her for being a playgirl and tryna control her from fucking people when we aren't together, fuck do I look like acting pussy crazed? you made a face while watching your favorite tv show.

You sat there thinking, lost in your thoughts deciding to get your shit together. You can't be out here in ATL crawling on all fours for shuri. You got dressed in a presentable fit, putting jewelry on, fuck I forgot to brush my teeth. You sighed brushing your teeth and putting makeup over the hickeys.

you left your phone at home going next door to the Udaku household you knocked once and T’challa answered, there were people in the back. And your brother. “Shuri isn't here,” T’challa said closing the door but you stopped it with your hand. “Not here for her. thank you.” you said staring up at him “Erik is- “not for him either nigga damn. Where is your mother?” you said getting annoyed with him.

“She's out back but aren't you too dolled up to be in a garden,” T’challa said raising an eyebrow and trying to get smart with you” boy I don't have the time or energy to deal with you today, either you move or im climbing that bigass fence out back, “ you said being deadass serious, they never took you seriously till you got pissy with them.

“ ight ight chill ma damn,” said T’challa letting you in. You see a woman with locs, she smiled and waved at you, a skin-bald woman focusing on talking to a man who looked like he lived breathed, and worshiped the gym, he made eye contact with you and you shivered walking faster to the back.

You opened the door to the garden seeing Ramonda drinking tea, she was waiting for you. “What's wrong umntwana wam?”(my baby) when you got to her table you sighed sitting down.

“I'm just so lost ever since we left Georgia.” You said holding her hand “well I'm here to listen, tell me everything, whatever you don't tell me I know already, honesty is key.” Said Ramonda smiling softly but being dead serious, ever since you were little she knew everything that happened as if she had eyes everywhere and you didn't know.

You took a deep breath and Ramonda nodded. “Well ever since we were moving here so fast without me being told this I've been so stressed. Because the day after I didn't go to school, T’challa and Erik cut connections with each other at 14, and for 3 years we kept fucking moving from school to school and then we came here??” you sounded so fucking confused “ And I was so happy to see shuri, I even ignored how I felt when I was with her because she made me feel so happy and good, then when I spent the night we did something, and I couldn't even wake up next to her I woke up in my room, no note no nothing just a text telling me to dress pretty for her like I'm some fucking doll” you expressed your frustrations while Ramonda watered her plants. She was listening, no matter what she did, she told you to continue either way.

“Then she smacked my butt? Idk why she keeps doing that I never understood the shit. And when I yelped because it hurt Erik and T’ just acted weird telling me not to scream or they're gonna make sure someone stops breathing?? Like and they were reaching for something too ?? Were normal highschoolers I don't get why it's like this Maam” you said face planting onto the glass table. “umntwana wam, don't do that it'll bruise your pretty face.” she went behind you taking care of your hair while you spoke to her about what happened.

“ And in school, these girls approached me at Gym trying to tell me to avoid shuri cause she's a playgirl, they call me fat like being fat is a bad thing? Then proceed to flirt with shuri in front of me and I guess shuri was ‘lost in the moment “ you said doing air quotes causing Ramonda to make an mm-mm sound . “and said hurtful shit and I didn't know what to do so I did what I did at other schools when I'm overwhelmed, I went to the bathroom but then ran there when the girl's friends ran after me to just give me a panic attack by yelling things and banging on my door” you said huffing you felt Ramonda braiding your hair but she was gentle and made sure not to hurt you.

“And then the girl I met when I was going to class with Shuri OH NO ABOUT THAt. Her name is Riri, right? She was so nice to me for some reason and we clicked instantly” you smiled at the memory “she helped me hide the gifts.. Shuri left” you rolled your eyes and Ramonda smacked your head, you hissed in pain “ow!” you say “ if you keep rolling those eyes you're gonna roll them to outer space,” she said, “ continue.”

You continued “ then this weir- I mean odd white boy” Ramonda never liked the word weird, she doesn't find people weird she finds them misguided. “he kept staring at me, then the teacher Ms. Romanoff was digging for information out of me, I was so confused because normal teachers don't fucking do that?? And Riri and Shuri already were shaking their heads no, even though I didn't know how to respond. nothing interesting about my family they are just farmers and accountants" she sighed " and then peter, that's the white boy's name btw, he was saying I don't know shit I should, Riri and shuri told him to shut up and just told me to hurry up to gym" you said confused as hell " Peter is right you don't" she said nearly finished with your hair, she was so relaxed while listening, a bird even landed on her shoulder.

"and that led to what I said at the gym, but I ended up crying so hard I threw up, and then Riri offered to help me fix my makeup or make it better, and she did." you smiled again at the bonding moment," she said she was gonna 'air this bitch out ' if they don't leave me alone whatever that means," you said shrugging, the motion made the bird leave.

"then yk the three musketeers came in looking like riri killed someone even though ik she wouldn't, that's illegal and only bad people do it.” you said confidently from what your “mother,” told you.

“ then they overwhelmed me, especially Erik trying to question me when I was already WAYY too overstimulated,” you said rubbing your temples while Ramonda did your edges. “I went to the library to fall asleep, I only wanted to skip through lunch, but I skipped 2 whole periods.” you said in a confused manner not knowing you were that tired “ Dont do that again, skipping is harmful to your grades.” she interrupted, showing care for you.

“and then shuri for some reason even if she was mad laid her head on my lap, and we ended up doing that. And I forgave her for some reason... That's all Maam” She nodded sitting down but yelled for Nakia, the girl with braided hair came out “ Yes ma'am? “ she had a nice voice, and she was pretty too..” could you take this set inside? We're done with our tea” Ramonda asked not breaking eye contact with you.

“Of course Ma'am" she nodded taking it inside not batting an eye at you. "so before I get into it and be honest with you, I want to meditate with you to make sure you're calm," Ramonda said, getting up placing two mats in the grass. you got on your mat sitting down crisscross applesauce style, Ramonda doing the same.

She guided you throughout the meditation with deep breaths and clearing your mind, you closed your eyes Repeating the steps and doing what you were told.

T’challa pov.

I don't know what the fuck her problem was when she came but I kept my cool.

I locked the door closing the blinds, everyone's phone was in a basket with their locations off.

“Who was that? “ M’baku said, with a smile on his face”nunya damn business nigga leave my sister alone” Erik Gave a stank face to M’baku, that dude always was a straight up weirdo to him.

“or what ??? You ain’t touching me" M'Baku said knowing it was the truth. Erik rubbed his temples " NIGGA SHEES GAAAY." Erik said tired of this beefy ass man. "oh" M'Baku said adjusting himself. Okoye bursted out laughing as Nakia chimed in laughing their asses off. "HAAA HE WAS GONNA TRY TO FUCK ON A GAY GIRL" Nakia laughed wheezing so hard she sounded like she was on life support.

When the two were done laughing like hyenas, the tv turned on as T'challa was presenting " So wbk gang and plug business that's how we thrive here." Everyone nodded some going like mhm, yea. " Recently our shipments have been going missing when in manhattan"T'challa had shown photos of 8 people A Man that look like he was freshly 50, with brown hair and a small beard, a long mustache, at the first incident with the touch passing through Greensboro, North Carolina. the truck driver was shot and the goods were taken.

then a woman that looked like Y/n's teacher, in a black jumpsuit, skintight. The truck was just barely through Charlottesville, she appeared in front of it causing it to crash off the course and blow up.

another one played, this one was familiar to Erik, it was the silhouette of his classmate peter parker. “T’ where these people from?” Erik looked at T’challa who looked at Nakia, she came back from outside putting the tea sets on the counter. “ They're from manhattan New York, working with Stark industries under stark directly” she turned on her computer and connected it to the tv, clicking on google docs.

“These docs are 67 pages in the counting of the information I collected on them including employee information. and ally information" Nakia said, her voice sounding like candy.

“Get to the point,” M’baku said, growing impatient with this talk, okoye rolled her eyes tired of this sassy ass man.

“I messaged you all your targets as the district leaders, you know what to do, quick, clean quiet” Nakia ended her presentation sitting back down as the lights came back on T’challa came back to the center.

“Do not by any means involve bystanders that aren't mentioned. “ T’challa said “ T’challa I don't get it, if the Kid was born into this why isn't she involved,” Okoye asked leaning against the wall and staring at the 6-foot man, Okoye definitely wasn't for this babying nonsense, she's grown, time to put her work in. “ shes soft, she’d fuck up,” Said T’challa deflecting her statement.

“Like Erik hasn't fucked up? He fucked up taking territory, and shipment deals ain't that why you petty ass niggas ain't friends no more because of that? But * she mocked T’challa babying y/n* ‘oh she's just a baby’” Okoye rolled her eyes to mars and back “if it's too much on her then that's that but you need to see her as a grown ass woman, not a child” Okoye said clearing T’challa

He looked at Nakia for help and she shrugged him off “she's right, shuri literally controls a district” Nakia seconds Okoyes point “but you do need to stop.” Nakia and Okoye sighed in unison “ But as you said don't involve bystanders right? Don't involve her in this” Nakia said, it was a threat to T’challa, and she didn't wanna see that kid in the business they were in.

Y/N pov

When You and Ramonda finished our meditation she sat me down explaining everything.

“you had to move from your last home because Erik had messed up a deal, he accidentally left the backpack full of the goods he was selling, and you know how that goes.” Y/n looked at Ramonda, not believing her, this shit sounded like the stuff that’d be in the movies. “You moved because it was trouble and would threaten your life since you hung around the customer, and they knew where you lived” she said "Don't believe it? read "

she tossed the newspaper to me and y/n read it. she couldn't believe it all when she got done reading she looked at Ramonda. "Is this gonna affect how you see us and your family?" Ramonda looked at her, hoping the girl wouldn't have said the wrong answer. “No. I know you guys aren't bad. But I have a question” Y/n said causing Ramonda to raise her eyebrow “ have any of you killed anyone?” Y/n said and Ramonda nodded.

“Justified in our eyes, they killed our members so we killed theirs.” Ramonda sipped her drink “ you won't be involved due to your heart being soft, and your little entanglement with shuri.”Ramonda said, wanting to avoid problems and issues in her business "oh, and about shu- "don't put all your peas in the pod, and shuri is just misguided and confused as are you, find your path." Ramonda interrupted "Oh and go to the store with The kids and their friends yeah? Here's the list. Use the car too" Ramonda handed me the list, wow that's a lot to unpack.

when I went in the house shuri was in the kitchen, she smiled at me, I wasn't gonna ignore her, I smiled back at her" Cmon Ramonda said we need to go to the grocery store" everyone turned their heads to me as I said that, T'Challa came over to me grabbing for the list but I smacked his hand. “I'm not a baby, don't baby me. I can get the stuff too, I'm a grown-ass woman T’challa” you snapped, stored anger coming out “She told me to drive too so cmon” you said walking through the living room and heading outside, the crew near the couch and shrugged not caring who drives. Everyone had come out with masks n hats on, shuri too.

You saw how good she looked, biting your lips and looking her up and down, but you shook your head not giving in to the temptations of that woman, Okoye, M'baku, and nakia hopped in their cars. you used the keys to unlock the car hopping in, shuri hopping in next to You, the two boys that were left sitting in the back.

“Ma, can you not crash this car ? We need it “ shuri said to you joking “before we drive im saying this to all of you” they looked at y/n confused as hell. “ Dont baby me. The shit is weird and im grown Aight?im not little anymore, babying me makes me uncomfortable, so treat me seriously" you said starting up the car , you drived infront of the other three, them following behind.

"What makes you think we baby you Y/n?" Erik said geniunely not noticing. " you treat me like i cannot handle my own situations, do everything for me and not let me do anything, when i want space you invade it and comfort me like im a child throwing a tantrum. dont do that shit anymore, this includes you shuri" you said with a monotone voice finally setting boundaries.

Erik nodded looking at T'challa, he also nodded accepting what y/n said. Shuri nodded slowly kissing her teeth.

You loved the sight of her being pissed off, she doesn't like being called off on shit she did as a mistake. you parked in front of nakia got out of the car taking the keys.

you hummed getting a cart, "wait get inside it" shuri said to me, with a smile on her face. "hmm.. alright ill go with your idea." You said hopping and sitting in the cart.

Shuri, pushed the cart with me inside, T'challa had split the list up for us to split up and get the items so they weren't in this store for long.

First me and shuri went down the dairy isle, we picked some things out , mainly eggs, then she span me around fast causing me to grip the cart tight. she giggled looking at me " stop taking everything seriously, have a little fun"

shuri said playing with my braids "mmmh my mom did this?" she tugged on it causing me to smack her hand.

"yeah she did and I look pretty." you took her advice and improved, you felt so free now, Shuri would grab seeds tossing them in. "I'm still mad at you though," you said, shuri kept going saying mhm “ because every time I'm upset you comfort me and we end up fucking, like I enjoy us fucking but when I need space I expect you to give it, and ill do the same." you looked back at her and she gave a kiss on your lips.

"im sorry my Nkosazana, ill take note of that to make your experience with me better." she gently strokes your face causing you to melt. "mmh hate when you just do that" you crossed tour arms pretending you weremt affected, you werent gonna let her she the affect she has on you. "what its just a kiss? am i not allowed to do that now mami?" Shuri smirked putting more stuff in the cart.

"Ah my legs are asleep, i wanna get out." you got out the cart with Shuri's help, wobbeling abit since your legs were asleep for 5 minutes. Shuri cackled at how you wobbled getting some ideas for later.

"Not today satan!" you said walking away from her as you heard her say so damn loud the entire store good hear almost " damn i love to see you go but hate to see you leavee.." she said without any shame in the world.

you walked faster bumping into Riri at the store, shuri was behind you but Riri wasnt paying no mind to her.

"Oh thanks for redoing my makeup i needed that yesterday" You said smiling at riri. "oh no problem, youre the world to me so id do anything to stop a friend crying" Riri smiled.

You gave her a hug, Riri's head laying in between your breasts, when you finished the hug she raised an eyebrow. "god damn i almost got suffocated between them bitches." Riri laughed causing you to laugh so hard you hold your stomach " god damn Ri your laugh is fucking contageous " you Sighed feeling eyes on you, you turned to shuri and man she wasnt happy, you dont know how but you wanted her to feel like how you felt yesterday.

"byee riri, oh wait! "you put on red lipstick, dark from your bag. "stay still f'me " you crouched, Riri taking offense to it, looking you up and down but her eyes wandering to your breast, then her eyes moving to shuri whose eyes were burning through her skull watching Y/n kiss her forehead.

“Damn Y/n thats all the love i get? I see now you js dont love your new bestie then.” Riri said, she was smart enough to know what you were doing, you planted kisses all over her face before going back to shuri, at this point your lipstick was off.

"okokay im done now lets check out!" you said with a smile,Shuri remained silent,moving to checkout. The cashieer didnt look at Shuri neither did the bagger. you hummed helping them , you looked at shuri seeing her text someone, you shrugged going outside.

You used the keys to T'challas car to unlock the trunk safely putting all the goods inside, closing the trunk.

LATER

You took a shower at shuri's, for some reason Ramonda told you to stay the night, out of curiousity, You sat on shuri's bed wearing a big T-shirt,no panties.

Shuri came in late, your eyes were on the tv hearing her close and lock the door,in this house when doors are locked no one goes upstairs, especially when its Shuri.

"Oh? how was your little buisness trip?"you looked at her with a innocent smile"buisness trip? ma i didnt go on no damn trip." Shuri said looking at you, she was already frustrated and upset yet you pushed further.

"oh dont lie to me i already know , your mother told me, so how was it." you looked back at the tv hearing shuri get close , her sweat going past the chains she waas wearing.

"do i need to teach you to mind your fucking buisness?" she gripped my jaw roughly turning me to face her,her eyes staring at me like i lost my damn mind " who are you talking to because it isnt m-" before you could even finish, her hand moved to your throat, turning your pussy into a pool. she was nearly choking you if she didnt have restraint.

"Say something smart and i will fuck you till you cant even think of some smart shit to say t'me, im most deffinently not the one bitch. you already pissed me off and im not in the moods for your games" She said, her accent coming out as she looked down at me as if i was a mere pet to her.

" takes a bitch to know o-" Again i couldnt get a word out, Shuri would let go of my throat and jaw flipping me over to where im on my stomach.

She got ontop of me whispering in my ear. "give me your verbal consent and ill pleasure you better then no woman can. ill have you wishing you were mine. ill even have you knowing who this pussy belongs to yeah?" She said in my ear, her accent turning me on. I'd nod and she yanked my hair back causing me to look up "Verbal.

I don't do that nodding shit." she said spitting venom at me “ Y-yes..” I whimpered out “yes what? Am i gonna have to teach you proper manners?” She said tilting her head, id only know this from the mirror she's forcing me to look at. “Yes mommy,” I said the shame leaving my body.

“atta girl. I wanna try somethin’ new” she unhooked my bra with one hand “sit up.im gonna get something right quick.” You sat up, your body acting against you once more.

You heard the Drawer open, looking at the stuff shuri pulled out, yet her back was blocking you from seeing, she left the room coming back with a clean strap on, rope and a blindfold.

“Shuri i dont thi- “i know you dont think, speak when youre told to.” She said

Tying you up making sure all you could move was your lower half.

Shuri blindfolded you tying it around you,you felt something graze against your skin, something sharp, you were scared yet aroused. "I dont get it Sthandwa.(my love) you know damn well im better than every bitch you could be with" she said, her eyes following your body. "You trying to make me jealous with Riri is crazy. You know damn well that girl cant do what i do." she kissed down your body, you felt the pretty marks she left.

"You aint catch what i said last time.." she whispered in your ear biting it gently, she left kisses and hickeys everywhere, every corner and area was covered.

she pulled me closer to her, flipping me onto my back facing her. i kicked her back putting up a challenge, she moved catching my leg. " i hope you dont fight this messy, you'd get your ass beat baby" she went to my wet pussy putting two fingers in, slowly thrusting them, I arched my back moaning, the way she thrusted and curled them made eyes roll back.

The squelching was heard causing Shuri to give a seductive 'mmh.' in response, she thrusted faster causing me to rock my hips with the thrusts my eyes watering , "ffuck im gonna cum soon Shurii.." Y/n moaned.

Shuri stopped towering over y/n, a frown over her face "Forget the name you know me by." Shuri demanded " when im pleasuring you, when im making love you, you will adress me as Ma'am, mommy, daddy wtv." She stared at me, you knew what she wants you to say, you dont wanna say it though. and yet my body yearns for her touch"Please Mommy . please can i cum from your fingers?" you whined out for her, soon enough she inserted her cold fingers back into your pussy abusing your G spot.

You arched your back to gour best abilities, unable to do it as well as you wanted due to the velvet ropes on your your body.

Your fluids went all over her fingers, you panted as your chest heaved up and down "mmh you look so pretty right now" shuri coo's tracing my figure with her knife.

" i dont 'preciate you kissin on other women baby." she frowned mocking me.

HOURS LATER.

You were shaking, your fluids dripping down youd legs after youve been edged so much. you could barely even think about anything, your words slurred as you were a moaning mess.

Shuri turned off the vibrator as soon as you were so close to cumming.

"now who are you thinking of hm? is it me? Sthandwa" (my love) she smiled at you, gently caressing your face.

"My brain is only full of you Mommy, please,I wanna cum" you begged and whined grinding against nothing, your fluids leakinf on her silky white sheets.

Her strap teased your folds as you whined "say the magic words." She said with a chuckle. "please fuck me, I deserve it, I deserve it so much" you wanted to reach for her but you couldn't, maybe if you weren't bratting, you wouldn't be tied up.

Shuri entered you slowly causing you to bite your lips, “it hhurts dont mmove” you whinced in pain “ ‘s okay baby, tell me when i can. Ill be gentle with you , for a short amount if time of course” she said, after a while the pain was gone “ you can move now i promise” you said nodding .

She thrusted slowly inside of me. Keeping the Rythm, she knew what she was doing, You wiggled in your restraints wanting to touch and hold her desperately.

“ Aww y/n wanna touch? Too bad. Maybe if you kept your lips to yourself this wouldn't have happened” she hissed out, she thrusted faster pleasuring you, her fingers circling your clit.

Your stomach turned into a knot as you bit your lips moaning louder, your sweet moans echoing throughout the house.

“Gonna cum again baby? Go ahead, ill let you ride your high” she set faster turning your brain into mush, you squirted uncontrollably as you twitched, panting,your senses were so overstimulated yet so deprived.

Shuri untied you ,gently removing your blindfolds,she picked you up carying you to the bathroom sitting you in the bathtub, once the bath was full, and (y/f/c) with (f/f) petals in it thanks to shuri.

“mmh. That was... A new experience” Y/n said sinking into the tub,”why dont you get in shuri, its big enough for two of us.” You said with a tired smile.

“Mmm.. Nah im good, jus’ let me take care of you ma” Shuri said dismissing the idea of being taken care of. “Mmm please mommy?” you said smiling .

“ Le intombazana izoba kukufa kwam.” she said looking up to any god that was left to help her. (This girl will be the death of me ) she undressed what left she had on, getting in.

LATER.

The two girls laid in bed together cuddled upon eachother, ofc y/n was the little spoon.

“Why cant i have you?” Y/n said looking up at shuri, she yawned trying to keep her eyes open. “ were both not ready yet. “ shuri said kissing my head. “Shit we havent had an actual kiss yet and you want us to- You interrupted her by kissing her passionately on her lips. Shuri kissed back moving y/n to ontop of her.

“Y/n if you want me take your time with yourself and me. Do you even know if you like me?” Shuri said, pulling y/n close and hugging her.

“I dont know... I dont even know what liking feels like.. Im too tired to think right now...” y/n said falling asleep.

shuri looked at her shaking her head.

“I'll give you all the time in the world.” shuri kissed her head before shutting her eyes.

[mothfables]

Modern Day Chain Work at a Christmas Market

so i work at a seasonal christmas market and had this idea today while we were doing set-up. time to induce my misery (lighthearted) on my favourite characters lmao

under the cut so it doesn’t take up your dash haha

Time is the closest thing they have to a manager. he does not like this. Warriors is a close second

Twilight + Four are in charge of physically setting up the tent/stall

Legend, Wild, and Four are in charge of displays (well, when Four isn’t fed up from setting up the tent)

Wild works in the back/warehouse, Time the register with regular breaks on the floor, Legend on the floor (he refuses to even touch the register), Hyrule the floor, Twilight on the floor and occasionally register, Sky’s the greeter and occasionally works the floor or other things, Warriors is mostly on the register, and Four does a bit of everything. Wind is technically, on paper, on greeter duty (cause, yknow, child labour) but he sticks his nose into everything, much to literally everyone else’s chagrin

Time tends to put Sky on greeter duty because he knows the other man tends to tire easily, but he does surprisingly well at whatever he’s assigned. that being said, whatever he does, he passes out immediately upon getting home

they tried the ‘My Name is Link’ nametag thing exactly once. they lasted two days before everyone was sick of it

Hyrule is still shy + uncomfortable around crowds, despite working there for four years. Time has tried putting him on the floor to try to boost his confidence, but he still escapes to the back at every opportunity

Legend flat-out refuses to work their busiest weekends. he told Time they’d have to drag him kicking and screaming into the store if they absolutely want him there. Time has yet to test this

Time + Twilight are physically intimidating, which tends to be a deterrent for most shoplifters + Karens. when that doesn’t work, though, they have a secret weapon: Hyrule

shy he may be, put him in front of a Karen and you’re in for a show. more than one of them have stopped what they’re doing to watch things go down. Time has berated them for it but they don’t pay him any mind considering he’s guilty of the exact same thing

also, Hyrule has a sixth sense for potential shoplifters, no matter where in the store he is. Four + Legend have been trying to figure it out but after four years they still don’t have an explanation

Time asked Mallon once if she wanted to work at the market with them. she laughed and told him she’d rather stay on the ranch. there are many days where Time regrets not doing the same thing

Wild does not work the floor. he has stated in no uncertain terms that if he’s put out there he will bite someone. to this day Time doesn’t know if he means a customer or one of them

everyone has their own organizational system that directly contradicts everyone else’s. they all hate it

Wind works the least hours out of all of them (considering he’s fourteen). he’s pouted about this many times, but the rest of them agree he should save his back + knees while he still can

Ravio is perfectly happy with his own shop. he does pop in sometimes to say hello, though, and on occasion brings treats for everyone

[astrabear]

1 and 7 for the fanfic author asks? 💖💖

Yay, thank you for asking!

1. What was your first fic and could you stand to reread it today?

Ok technically the first fic I can remember writing was in 2013. I had just reread The Secret of NIMH and was stuck by a wave of compassion for the researcher who lost his life's work. I had an idea for a whole long and intricate follow-up which I never had any intention of writing. But I did write a couple of vignettes, only one of which I can easily find. And it's perfectly fine to read (I'll paste it at the end of this post.) It helps that I was in my mid-30s at the time.

7. What’s the fic you most want to continue (unfinished or no)?

I have a lot of ideas for a sequel/second chapter for Finders Keepers, in which I really dig into Booker trying to work on his shit. The problem is that it involves him reading and responding to particular books, and in order to write it well I would need to (re)read those books, and it's just not a priority. But I really want Booker to discover logotherapy. Oh, you outlived your family? Meet Victor Frankl, you whiny bitch.

Anyway, here's a tiny snippet from my entirely imaginary NIMH sequel exploring the disintegration of Dr. Schultz's life after the rats escape:

Donnie Kirkland's father had become convinced that the bomb was going to drop within the next year, two at the outside, and had started building a bomb shelter and stockpiling foods. So Mark reported Friday afternoon, when Eugene picked him up from school. Other men could sit around and hope for the best, but Mr Kirkland was going to make sure his family made it out alive. Eugene wanted to tell his son that you're never really prepared for the end of the world. You can try, but no collection of checklists, no stacks of neatly-typed policies and procedures, no amount of cool-headed foresight can really save you. The usual rules don't apply; that's what the end of the world means.

But visitation weekends were short enough already, and he didn't want to waste time on another argument. He could still remember the last one, still remember the impatience in Mark's voice when he asked, "Is this about those stupid rats again?" Eugene had tried to turn the argument with a joke, had said he only wished the rats were stupid, if they'd been stupid he'd have been a lot happier. But Mark could tell he hadn't really meant it. So this time Eugene kept his thoughts to himself and took Mark to a movie instead, some Western with Steve McQueen. And for the rest of the day, he didn't think about the rats at all.

Most of the day, anyway. Four hours, at least. No less than three.

[sugrhigh]

hey girl… imma give u a storytime cuz im going CRAZY

so me and this guy we work together, we have a seasonal job in the summer. we got really close real fast and we don’t exactly flirt like complement each other we like have a flirty banter if that makes sense? anyway i used to like him a lot but then the job ended and we didn’t really see each other that much but we still talk like daily so i kinda lost feelings. he also was talking to this other girl so i didn’t want to get in between them yk. but then we smoked together after not seeing each other for probably 2 months? then he told me ab how this girl is literally crazy and technically cheated on him even though they weren’t really dating. so then he goes “so as of today im a free man” and then we start talking about our sex history LMAO and then at the end of that convo he goes “i honestly thought me and you were gonna end up doing something” i literally DIED that was my confirmation that we both liked each other at one point ya know… so i replied saying something like “oh yeah same here” and he goes “yeah don’t you remember the rumours of us dating??” (i literally don’t and never heard of it) he was literally SOO SURE about it he was like “like 10 of our coworkers came up to me and asked if we were dating” im like oooookay whatever you say… (my friend is convinced he was “lying” to make something happen yk… i kinda think so too cuz i NEVER HEARD OF THAT RUMOUR. im also way closer with all the other coworkers because this guy im talking ab came into the job like during the last 2 months when i was there the whole time if that makes sense LMAO) so im like “oh really? i never heard anything ab that” and hes like “oh yeah it was crazy” and then it was like silent for a good minute and then all the sudden he goes “wanna makeout?” HOLYYYY FUCK I DIED BRO I FUCKING DIED so then we did and it was gooooooood until my fucking mom called and interrupted us… still mad ab it to this day. anyway that was all we did just makeout then i had to drop him off at home cuz he had work or something the next day, and i had a early flight the next day too LMAO.

so we never talked ab that AT ALL, and i get home from my vacation which was literally A WEEK. he’s texting me saying “girl i might have a gf soon” so im like oh! okay!!! great!!! and hes like “you have to hear the tea its so good” so then we hung out that night and he told me how he is now dating the best friend of the girl who cheated on him 😭😭 like okay king get it but i was kinda bummed that he sorta used me as a rebound but I honestly didn’t give a fuck and I didn’t let it hurt me. cuz i wasn’t gonna lose one of my best friends over stupid feelings ya knoww. so thats that NOW HERES THE GOOD PART.

me and him only ever hangout just us two or with our other coworkers. this weekend my girlfriends finally came home from uni and stuff so we obviously went out to bars lol, i was asking him to pick me up because we both live out in the country side of our town rather than the city ya know? so it was just easier that way, and it was supposed to be just me him and one of his friends but then my girls ride canceled on them so i asked if he could drive them home and he said yes. so now this the first time my friends have met him and like seen us together. keep in mind he still has that gf… the car ride was so fun all of us were laughing and we all got along very well. we drop off my one friend at her house and then he turns to me and is like “can we all come into your house i need to hit that bong” so im like yeah ofc duh and literally he wanted to get to my house SO BAD he didn’t even drop my other friend off, she was forced to stay the night at mine like 😭😭😭 anyway its the four of us now (me and my girlfriend, then him and his best friend) and we get to my house, i quickly change outta my bar clothes cuz fuck that then i go upstairs to see him at the top of the stairs and hes like “dude ive been WAITINGGGG lets fucking go” im like “what about our other friends dont they wanna smoke too?” And hes like “nahhh we need our time together” HELLO??!!! Died. so then we smoked blah blah our usual conversations and then we go back inside and all of us start playing mariokart. then they left cuz he was forcing me to go to bed so i could wake up and go to work in the morning 😭 but as soon as they left my girlfriend turned to me and was like “DUDEEEEE HE WANTS YOU SOOOO BAD” …. so now im going crazy 😀 mans has a fucking gf but is lowkey so flirty towards me and if my FRIENDS SAW THAT DURING THE FIRST TIME THEY MET HIM…. and the morning after i texted our girls gc and was like so guys am i going crazy or is there something here?? and they all replied with yes he wants you so bad bro. and my girlfriend apparently overheard him talking to his best friend and was like “me and my gf are fighting and shes literally crazy” so im like FUCKKKK LIKE WHAT DO I DO. and i think us 4 are gonna hangout again this weekend. so uh ill keep u updated if u want 😀 also sorry this is terribly long but IM GOING CRAZY AND I NEED HELP

OH MY GOD I AM SO INVESTED IN THIS PLS KEEP ME UPDATED MY SWEET LADY!!!!

he def sounds like he wants u in my humble opinion, i think whoever he’s dating now is the rebound from making out with YOU cuz it doesn’t seem like he likes her too much plus he jumped into it really quick. if yall hang out this weekend i would be a little extra flirty and see if maybe that inspires him to grow a pair and tell u how he feels

but always remember that no man is ever worth ur peace of mind so if he doesn’t sack up and be honest with you and his gf and himself….he can move to the back of the line!

[subbe93]

The Symptoms of Love: The Diagnosis

After Sonoko's parents' party, Ran hadn't been herself: the certain detective has been on her mind nonstop, and it is time to do something about it! But before she can do that, she needs to meet her last client of the day.

A/N: Well, here it is, the last part! I want to thank all of you, once again: Thank you for reading this story, thank you for leaving a like, thank you for comments, and thank you for sharing these (and leaving comments on tags, I have read them all!) ❤ They have all meant so much to me! And it also makes me happy that you have enjoyed the story so far ^_^ Now, let's wrap up this story! I hope you enjoy the last part ❤

The First Symptom The Second Symptom The Third Symptom The Fourth Symptom The Fifth Symptom

The Diagnosis

Ran’s fingers ran fast on the keyboard when she typed her report on the computer. It was the last one of the day. It was almost four and Ran was so happy to know that after this, she can start her weekend. The day had been very long, busy, and challenging and she was so ready to go home and rest.

Well, the end of this week had been one kind of a mess in many ways. She kind of didn’t want to admit it to herself, but Sonoko’s parents’ party and how it had ended had been running through her mind all over again. As much as she tried to move on, get them away from her head, it all came back to her, haunting her nights and distracting her days.

She was still very disappointed that she hadn’t had a chance to talk with Kudo after the whole mess. She knew that there was a simple solution, but even though she had tried, she was still too shy to make contact with him.

But she had promised herself that it was going to be her mission for a weekend: She would do something about it! She has to!

But… maybe tomorrow. She deserves her rest for today, right? Right?!

She knew that if she would do it after work, it would have been done, but only the thought made her stomach twitch. Somehow the idea of buying some wine and good food on her way home, taking a warm shower, and taking it easy, maybe watching some movies or series, sounded so much better. Oh, and only the idea of wearing something nice and cozy, just be and enjoy peace and silence…

And probably thinking about Kudo, stressing about the call or the message, thinking about all kinds of outcomes…

Well, maybe you should contact him right after work, so you can relax as soon as you got an answer?

Ran let out a sigh. Yes yes, she would do it. Tomorrow.

You said that yesterday too, right?

Fine! I’ll do it after this!

She heard the knock on her door.

What now?

“Come in!” she called. She could hear the door opening. Fast she ended the sentence that she had been writing before she ripped her eyes away from the report and turned to look at the door. It was Hotogi, their receptionist, who peeked inside from the doorway.

“Mouri-sensei?”

“Yes”, Ran answered gently and turned with her chair to encourage that young man to come in and tell what was on his mind. “How can I help you?”

“Well”, he started nervously. “I know that your day is over, but… There is a client who wants to meet you.”

Ran frowned. “Well, Natsuo-san is working on six, so he can…”

“But the client said it has to be you.”

Ran wanted to sigh, but she kept it to herself. “Is it urgent?”

Hotogi hesitated for a moment. “Well, he said it is”, he answered, sounding unsure. “He said it can’t wait…”

Ran glanced at the clock on her table. There were five minutes before her day would end, so technically she didn’t have to take this client in. But at the same time, she didn’t have the heart to turn him off, and if he really got something urgent…

She reminded herself that this isn’t going become to a habit.

“Fine”, she said finally and smiled at Hotogi. “Tell him to come straight in. But he is the last one, period.”

He showed her a smile and nodded before closing the door. Ran looked at the closed door for a moment before she turned back to the computer and looked at the report, checking it through. God, she felt a little disappointed that her day was stretching a little, but at least she would get paid for it, and in the end, it wouldn’t take long. At most a half hour…

She heard a knock on the door. A client.

“Come in!” she shouted and hoped that the client was brave enough just come in. She typed the last sentence to the end while the door opened and closed. She almost hit Enter to mark it as done.

“Good day, Mouri.”

Her movement stopped and her index finger stayed hovering over the Enter

That voice… 

Butterflies started to fly on her stomach and a wide smile came to her lips. God, she almost wanted to hate herself for that! And this time, she couldn’t even blame the wine.

What was he doing here?

Well, at least you don’t have to contact him now.

It almost made her stomach turn around, but she tried to get hold of herself.

“Good day to you too, Kudo”, she answered as casually as she could while finally pressing Enter. Ran tried to control her smile when she turned around with her chair, meeting the man in front of the door, and raised her leg on top of another. She looked at Kudo Shinichi, who stood there, his sparkling blue eyes looking at her. He got a little smile on his lips, and like a few days ago, he got a suit on him. Not as formal though: Light-colored jacket, dark shirt, and a little darker jeans and tie.

Well, who was she trying to kid? He probably looked good in anything he wore.

But for a man who had come to see her with an urgent matter, he seemed to be fine.

“How can I help you?” Ran asked and raised her eyebrows, trying to ignore how her heart beat in her chest. “I hope you know that this is going overtime.”

He sneered out. “I know it very well”, he answered. “It took so much time and effort to talk your receptionist over.”

Ran rolled her eyes. “Well, I also hope you know that since it is you, I’m going to charge you with very good extras.”

Kudo laughed. “I figured”, he said and looked at her. “But I promise, I pay as soon as we are done here.” He kept a little pause. “And with good extra, if you accept it.”

To be honest, she wouldn’t. But he would find it out from the bill.

“So, before your bill is going to be too much to pay, what can I do for you?” she asked and smiled. She enjoyed this too much. Suddenly, she wasn’t in that much hurry to leave.

Actually, now she felt like she would love to stay in this moment forever.

Ran observed how Kudo’s smile faded before he looked away like… Like… Was he nervous? That made Ran become serious too. She couldn’t say that she knew Kudo too well, but to be honest, she wanted to claim that she had spent enough time with him that she could tell when the situation was serious and when not.

And now it looked like this was something serious.

“I… I think it’s my heart.”

Ran felt her chest tightening and it made her only worried.

“Your heart?” she asked and stood up.

“Yeah”, he answered and looked at her from the corner of his eyes. “I… It’s… sometimes beating so fast and… and I got nervous and… warm, and restless, and…” He looked away like he was embarrassed. “And sometimes it feels like it’s… hard to breathe…”

That didn’t sound good, not at all! Ran stepped closer to him and took her stethoscope in her hand. “Took off your shirt, I listen…”

He startled a little and took a step away from her. Ran raised her eyes at him, seeing how he looked terrified. “Oh… well, I… I don’t think it’s necessary…”

Ran frowned for a while before she smiled at him gently. He must be really worried. “I know it’s sometimes scary to find out what’s wrong”, she started as gently as she could, hoping it would make him relax. “But to be honest, that doesn’t sound good at all, and the sooner we find out a reason for it, the sooner we can start to act and take care of it…”

Kudo looked at her troubled, yet he didn’t meet her eyes. “I don’t… think it’s anything that medicines can help with.”

Ran tilted her head. “You don’t?” she asked and looked at his chest. She doubted it. “Maybe you should let a doctor decide about it.”

“Well, it… it usually happens around one certain doctor”, he continued.

What?!

Ran raised her eyes to look at him. He was looking at her, with a weird expression, while his cheeks got a nice shade of red. Wait, was he meaning…

“So”, he continued before stepping back a little bit and taking his hand away behind his back. Before Ran really realized it, in front of her was a big, beautiful bouquet of red roses. “Would that Mouri-sensei, who has been messing with my feelings for some time now, maybe go out with me?”

Ran stared at those flowers for a moment before she raised her eyes to see Kudo’s expression. He was looking at her with a determined look, and yet, she could see his nervousness.

He means… me?

It made something flutter on her stomach while her cheeks were burning. She dropped her eyes back to the roses, trying to get out any reasonable sentence, but instead, she felt like her head was empty. She didn’t find the words, not any kind of…

Then she started to smile. God, she felt like she was smiling so much that her cheeks would be torn apart.

He is asking her out?!

She is going on a date with him?!

“When?” she asked finally, as soon as she got hold of herself even somehow. She courage herself to look at him again, trying even a little bit to hide her excitement, but when she saw his face, she could tell that she hadn’t succeeded. He seemed relaxed and he smiled. He looked as excited as Ran felt right now.

“As soon as you get out from work”, he answered.

She let out a laugh. “You know you’re the one who is keeping me here?”

He glanced at the clock on his wrist. “And if I’m fast, maybe I don’t have to pay extra”, he said, gave those roses to Ran’s hands, and winked. “I’m waiting for you in the parking lot.”

She just stared at those roses, feeling happy and excited and… and…

And then the reality hit her.

Ran raised her eyes fast from the roses. “But… wait!” Kudo stopped at the door and turned to look at her. Ran felt nervous, so she lowered her gaze. She kind of hated that she was the one who was ruining this moment, even though she tried to tell herself that it wasn’t her fault. How in the world she could have known this morning that she is going on a date? Of course, she had put those cozy, worn-out clothes on her before coming to work. In the grocery store, they wouldn’t mean anything. No one would care. And after that, she had planned to go straight to home. But…

But knowing Kudo, he would take her just somewhere. She was pretty sure that he would take her to some fancy place, somewhere luxurious… And looking at him, in a suit…

God, she could never stand beside him with that old, pink hoodie and sweatpants.

So, as much as she wanted to… “I…” She stared at those roses, feeling sad and disappointed. “I don’t really have suitable clothes with me that I could go for a… date…”

“A woman like you looks amazing in everything”, he answered, making Ran blush even more. She felt like a teenager, getting flattered by one, simple and very cheesy sentence. She could hear her mother's voice telling her how men with cheesy words like those would be the worst and that she should stay away from them.

But had Kudo said anything nice to her before? Considering that she didn’t have anything in her mind, she believed that he wouldn’t say that for fun.

Or maybe she was the fool here, getting flattered about every nice word he said?

She let out a short laugh and courage herself to look at him. “I don’t think I look very good on worn-out sweatpants and hoodie.” Then she let her eyes wander to his suit, and she felt even more awkward. Even the thought… “There is no chance I can go out in those, with a man in a suit.”

Kudo frowned. “Well, I would go out with you even if you have dressed in sweatpants and a hoodie”, he said casually, making Ran smile again and roll her eyes. God, she felt really stupid right now! Has she really fallen for him that badly? “But if you want to, I can always drive to your place so you can change before we go.”

Those butterflies started to fly on her stomach again when she tightened her grip around the bouquet. “Then I’ll be there soon”, she answered and raised her eyes to meet Kudo’s. He nodded before stepping outside and closing the door, meeting her eyes just before the door was shut.

Ran looked at the door for a moment before lowering her eyes to roses. After a few seconds, she let out a silent shriek and carefully hugged those roses, trying her hardest not to ruin them. God, she just wanted to dance around and scream with her excitement! God, she was so happy!

And with that excitement, she hurried to check out that she had made all her work and reports ready before shutting the computer and leaving the room in a hurry, running to the dressing room to change!

That night, she got a fancy (and expensive) dinner at the restaurant and a nice walk in the city, and after he escorted her home, she got a long and sweet good night kiss.

~ The End ~

[notsocheezy]

Brain Curd #36 - Rerun Monday #2

Brain Curds are lightly edited flash fiction, posted daily. Since I want to start writing new chapters of Dominic of the Darkness as Brain Curds, here is the never-before-released second chapter. Please enjoy.

Dominic entered the throne room. He was used to seeing disturbing things in here, but this one took the cake. It was a BDSM session between a Jewish dominatrix and a Nazi, and it was clearly not done out of affection.

He waited by the side of the room, hoping it might end any minute, but the violence continued to escalate alongside the Prince of Darkness’ laughter. It went on for hours, maybe days (time was funky in Hell) until finally the dominatrix got bored and apparated back to Heaven. At least, Dominic figured that was where she was going.

The Nazi was removed from the room by four demons with five shovels, who exited in single file with their piles of undulating flesh. The man would have to reform in The Pit - as if today hadn’t already been bad enough for him.

Now, contrary to popular understanding, the Prince of Darkness did not go by the name ‘Satan’. It was a typographical error, caused by an ancient monk with dyslexia. No, the source of all evil was not known as ‘Satan’ down in the bowels of Hell, all the demons knew him by another name: Stan.

If you were wondering why he’s called the ‘Prince’ rather than the ‘King’, the answer to that is simple: he thought it made him sound younger.

Dominic approached his post in the throne room, as he did every day, on the high chair next to his father.

“Ah, my boy!” Stan said. “I didn’t see you there!”

“That was on purpose,” Dominic muttered, knowing his father was barely paying any attention.

“Take a seat! Another show is about to begin!” He turned his voice to the sycophants around him. “Get my son a plate, you jagoffs! He’s gotta be hungry by now!”

The demons scrambled to find a plate, but they were all dirty - not a problem for the average resident of Hell, but Dominic had higher standards. Most of Hell’s catering staff referred to him as “Princess Boy” as a sign of disrespect. He didn’t like it, but couldn’t come up with an adequate punishment. Eternal hellfire was too harsh, but probation felt like it would probably just encourage them.

A short, pinkish demon resentfully handed him a still-dripping plate. “Here you go, Princess Boy.”

Dominic pretended not to notice. In front of him and his father was a table covered in an absurdly massive spread that would have made Henry VIII blush - in fact, at times it had (his time in Hell made him much less plump). Despite Stan’s insistence, Dominic was not actually particularly hungry, and he couldn’t come up with a technique for getting the last scraps from the goat carcass anyway.

“Dad, about my birthday…”

“Birthday? Oh, for Pete’s sake! How old are you now?”

“Six-hundred and sixty-six.”

“No!”

“Yes.”

“There’s no way you’re that old, son, I remember the night I knocked up your mother like it was last Tuesday.”

“Technically, it was, since you declared Tuesdays illegal that weekend.”

“Now how would you know that if you weren’t born yet?”

“I read books, Dad.”

“Whatever. What do you want?”

“I want my overnight pass for Earth.”

“What the heck do you need that for?”

“It’s tradition, isn’t it? For me to go live on the surface and see what life is like?”

“You’ve been up there before. What’s so special about it? Anything you can get up there, I can get for you down here. The demons can make anything!”

“Dad…”

“I’ll even ask them not to spit in it! They’ll still spit in it a little, but you won’t even taste it!”

“I need to spread my fallen angel wings,” Dominic replied, standing his ground (metaphorically, because as you may recall, he sat down just a moment ago). “Don’t make this difficult.”

“Alright, well… if you’re going up there, you should probably know something. Your mother was a living human…”

“Right, yeah, I know.”

“… And she’s still alive.”

Dominic was in shock. “You said she was in a better place!”

“Every living person is, Dominic, we’re in Hell. Plus, I’m a liar.”

“What exactly am I supposed to do with this information?”

“I don’t know, what am I, a librarian? Go find her, or don’t, or whatever. It’s your age to come-of. Now let’s eat already.”

[onmywaytofanfic]

NEW BEGINNINGS - CHAPTER 1

So... As I said in a previous post, I am working on a re-do of Reina's backstory. However, in teh process and thanks to a friend (@yamanaka-shin you keep putting ideas in my head D: ) an idea pop up, MutaxReina. I have not been able to change it and it hunts me...and it has turn into a very interesting AU and version of Reina that I want to investigate and check more. There is also someone else's OC is involve @kankuroplease ' s Katsura. I have talked so Katsura would be mentioned at some point....here you can see a little glimpse. But.... Welll.... REINA x MUTA is a reality !! BEWARE: That this is going to be hurtful. It is going to be a lot of angst, but it feels like healing too.

WARMINGS: Self-harm mentions (Not descriptions just innuendo)

WORDS: 1370

“Until this day… I wonder why I thought that they would come, why my head, my heart hoped that once I was out of there, I would see their smiling faces. I will finally feel what a mother’s hug feels like, what a father’s kind words are and how a brother’s shoulder feels like. I still wonder, what part of me led me to think that. I wonder what made me think that I had a choice. I kept safe the letter that informed all of us that Root was disbanded of their usage. It is something silly and stupid to keep. A letter that confirms that I was no longer part of Root, still…I don’t know why I hold onto it so much. Anyway, I kept it. I remember that I have pictured that moment plenty of times when the letter was in my hands. When I was…given… sold…I think trade feels more accurate. When they trade me for Tatsuma I… he…I’m sure that you will laugh about it but I felt happy. I thought that maybe, now that I did what I was supposed to do, maybe now…my mother would hug me. She just grabbed him like it looked so good. She was crying, she buried her face in his shoulder, and dad was smiling. It was the first time that I ever saw him smiling so much. I made them happy. I made them like that I…” She could not hold her tears any longer, a small whimper and a cry. The doctor gave her some tissues.

“It was me who they should be hugging…I make it possible for them to be together. It was I” She kept weeping. Ashamed buried her face in her hands, letting her mane flow wild “I did it, I was good. I did everything…I…” The doctor stopped writing for a second and touched her shoulder “You need to let things go now Reina. You are the one that needs to hug that child, not them, they never deserved you '' Gen had been of great help for her recovery. He was the doctor of the centre, well one of them. A Yamanaka as a therapist always sounds good. He was the best at his job, it took Reina some time…more than two months to start at least answering back “How are you, today?” Every other day they got that long hour of a session. Technically, if you do not undergo them, you can’t have visits coming over. However, he always asked her if she wanted a visit. She never answered back. 

“And then…” she cleansed her nose “Seeing Shino there just hugging his brother. Seeing Torune with his family and Shino with her…” She wiped out some tears “It’s just…” Gen nodded and wrote something on his notepad “trigger”. She laid down and kept hiding her face from him, she had recently started to talk that much in therapy, she even started to have some quick chats with some other interns and nurses. However, she kept that awful thing, she bit her lips and fingers, she knocked her head and sometimes hit her head with her wrist out of anger. Gen let all the things down and looked at the clock, it was time, it was over for today. “You are doing great, Reina. I thought that you will never talk ever again” Four months already locked out there. “I…I want to go out” confessed. The doctor stood up “That needs a little more time you know that” She nodded and rose leaving the room “Would you like to see someone this weekend?” she froze at the opened door. She was thinking for the first time about Gen’s proposal, her answers had always been direct and straightforward. She turned around with her ankles and look down, ashamed, scared…blushing.

“Could you ask…Aburame Muta if she wants to come?” 

“I will” 

She gave a gentle nod and disappeared. She rarely interacted with other patients; however, she did not deny the gentle nod of greeting nor answer when she was asked for something. She almost seemed like she started to trust people back. There were moments in which she could not hold it and just locked herself in her room, denied caring or even caring for herself. She stood in her bedroom now with the door closed and the window faintly open. It did not have much space, aside from the small bedroom, a tiny drawer where most of her belongings were and a small hand size mirror. The bathroom only had the WC, and you could wash your hands on top of it, the faucet was extensible, so it also served as a shower in less than 2 meters. Everything was packed uncomfortably, technically to encourage patients to socialize. It had the opposite effect on her, she was comfortable there, in a small space, not bothering anyone, not being a burden. She liked to be isolated, but lately she had found some stuff missing from outside.

The book shop, the bakery, the smell of freshly cooked cookies by Muta, the touch of the grass in her feet, the sound of street music, seeing the insects and the animals roam free in the compounds… She thought she hated everything, and now she was discovering everything that she was missing. Even clothes! She usually wore her uniform, even when she shouldn't, never allowing herself to dress up with anything that was not practical or functional. Now, she had found skirts and dresses and she was eager to try one of those on, to wear one. She wanted a summer dress, one of those that she had seen in the magazines that were in the common room. The people wearing them looked so happy, cheerful, full of life, she thought that it was something that those dresses gave to them. She knew the one that she wanted, a white one, with a small pattern of butterflies on it, a little bit above her knee maybe, and those lovely sleeves that only covered the shoulder. Maybe even some cleavage showing? Yes, maybe. She wanted one of those, and the sandals that had a little heel, they looked so fresh, so stunning. Whenever she saw someone wearing those in a magazine, they were beaming. Definitely, it was the dress that made that. 

She had started to send letters outside… to Muta. They were not that frequent, but when she found the courage to write to him, she spent hours writing and writing. She always asked if it was okay for her to write to him, and he replied that it did not matter, in fact he was glad to receive them. She also asked if it was okay to ask him to come, he always said that he would come. However, not until today, had she given him the possibility to come. She felt selfish, as if she somehow was trapping the guy, not letting him go but… Now she felt ready to know him. After all, who would have liked to be sold as a bride? Yet, she felt that it was unfair…she felt now, that it was unfair for her side to blame everything exclusively on him. Some people told her that it wasn't, some people told them that it was. He accepted the marriage proposal, as he had told her, to help her escape. He said it on the wedding night, “I don’t want anything from you but for you to be happy. Just, forget that we are married if that makes you feel good. I just wanted you out of there” But weren’t there any better options to do so? Maybe just asking her if she wanted to be married, although she already knew that she would deny it. That if his father and uncle did not accept and requested that arranged marriage, she would still be there…with her father and brother. Maybe, she thought, luckily, she felt a twist in her stomach, maybe dead too. 

She laid on the bed, her insects buzzing and dancing around her. She had stopped to do many hurtful things, her hive started to answer back. Her hive, fighting her back. Not all hope was lost within her.

Some drawigns of these two... they are nto that good but here you got some.

SPOILER: She is just unconscious, she is good.

[thessalian]

Thess vs The Longest Week

So, more work updates.

Scruffman hadn't put a Teams meeting in the diary like he said he was going to, so I dropped him an email to ask. He said he'd "give a bell" on Tuesday instead so he'd have a better idea of the shape of the rest of the week. I pray he decides that I don't need to actually go in. This week has been bad enough, and it's not technically over yet.

This week has seen me doing nearly ten hours total overtime over four days, and looks like I'll be putting in some work on Saturday too. Thing is, even with Scruffman in, not a whole lot of typing was getting done by anyone but me. Add to that a whole bunch of long complicated bullshit, not to mention a couple of them who fucked up their dictations beyond all recognition and obliged me to drop them an email going, "You forgot the block key, I couldn't hear this word because you were sitting several feet away from your microphone, you took your foot off the footpedal at an inopportune moment and cut out a whole bunch of measurements, please tell me this was meant to be 5mm or 0.5cm and not 0.5mm because you don't do slices that thin in these things..." and on and on and on... Also the ones who miss things and wind up having to go back to the macro three or four times in the middle of the block key without giving any indication of where in the macro report the new stuff has to go, and the ones whose sentence structure is abominable even when English is their first language (for those who don't have English as their first language, I tend to cut them some slack). In short, I'm having to clean up an awful lot of messes while still trying to do the job of multiple typists.

Part of the problem at this point is that we have so many more junior doctors, and everyone - junior doctors included - are in a massive hurry, and so they kind of foul things up. And of course, we're understaffed. When we had fewer doctors doing dictation and two extra people in, we were just a little bit overstaffed, and that was comfortable because if a lot of unexpected absences happened, we could still carry on well enough. But we had two people leave last year - one having moved on to greener pastures, one just having walked right out - and more doctors, so now we're massively understaffed and can barely keep our heads above water when we have everyone working, never mind when we have so many unexpected absences. Head Honcho really has got to get us a replacement for Sunshine at minimum, but it's been ages and it hasn't happened so I doubt it will.

Anyway, so that's why I've pulled a total of nearly ten hours of overtime this week, and why I'll be doing some work on Saturday as well. Because people come in and report on weekends on top of everything else, and there seems to be literally no one else to type things but me. I am so exhausted I can't even begin to tell you, but despite that, I haven't slept properly for most of the week, given pain and stress. Even my breaks were generally to get essentials done - trip to the corner shop, ordering the monthly grocery shop, stuffing something resembling dinner into my face, bath to hopefully soak out some of the aches, stuff like that.

I guess there's some good news, though. Today was payday, and there were things that required ordering. Like, for instance, a kitchen scale for those annoying times when recipe ingredients lists go by weight. And some cake tins. And some gluten-free self-raising flour that has good reviews and doesn't require me to know how much xanthan gum to put in the damn thing. I mean, bread is definitely on the list of things I want to make, but I also intend to make the absolute most out of Baking Yesteryear. So tomorrow, in between having to go out for a couple of errands and the never-ending overtime, I intend to make Admiral's Gingerbread. I will very much deserve a treat after this clusterfuck.

[vinkunwildflowerqueenupdates]

A Year Ago Today

If you follow me here, you probably know that I'm working on a Christmas fic right now. You may also know that this was something I've been working on for a year, and was originally intended to be written for Christmas 2021.

And then right after I had the idea (in August), I bought a house. Which changed my plans, because I had limited time due to packing and everything that goes into buying a house.

You may also know that the other thing that happened during that time was that I injured my back. Bulging Disc.

Well, that was a year ago today.

And because my anxiety-ridden brain loves to dwell on these things, I decided to write it all out as best as I remember it. Which is messy. But it did make me feel better.

So, here it is:

My back hurt. The spot right in my lower back where your back meets your hips, right alongside either side of my spine (in between L5 and S1 vertebrae if you wanna be technical and know your spine quite well. I did not yet. I just knew that was The Spot Where It Hurt).

Which was nothing unusual. It’s hurt since I was eighteen (I was thirty-one at this time). And I’d spent the past days and weeks packing and moving boxes full of my life to the new house. Of course it hurt. (Yes, I’d had movers do most of it, but I’d still done the majority of the packing and there were some boxes and things that I didn’t trust to the movers). 

But now it was done. All the boxes were moved into the new house, the important things were unpacked- kitchen, books, DVDs. The latter two may not seem important to most people, but when you have twenty-two boxes of books (the movers said it was the most boxes of books they’ve ever moved and I was quite proud), and three or four boxes of DVDs (yes, I still have DVDs), unpacking them clears a lot of space.

I’d survived another week at work, going home each afternoon and unpacking more boxes until I couldn’t handle moving any more and then retreating to the couch. I’d already decided to give myself the weekend off from unpacking this weekend, just to rest.

“A whole day in bed only getting up for food or the bathroom will just give my back a chance to rest,” I’d decided. 

So that’s what I did on Saturday. 

On Friday night, I’d moved my laptop and my little portable laptop table upstairs and didn’t get up except for food or the bathroom. Or to heat up my heat bag. Which despite having a TV in my bedroom and doing much the same things I would be doing downstairs sprawled on the couch, was super boring. 

When I woke up on Sunday, I was bitterly disappointed that my day of rest had not magically cured my back pain. 

My next hope for a miracle cure was a hot shower. Just standing there beneath the hot water. I don’t remember if I attempted to wash my hair or not. I know I didn’t try to shave my legs- I’d done that on Friday night in the shower. It hurt to bend over, so I’d had the bright idea just to squat and shave my legs that way. Which worked until it hurt too much to stand, and there was nothing in my shower I could grab to pull me up. 

I’d honestly thought that I’d have to crawl out of the shower on my hands and knees to the toilet and use that to get myself up. Luckily, I managed to stand eventually. I don’t remember how now. 

So I wasn’t going to attempt that again. 

I got out of the shower and got myself dressed slowly. Putting pants on also was a thing, because raising my knee to my chest hurt. I don’t remember the Before, but I know After the only way for me to get pants on was to lie on my back and put my pants on that way, like some kind of weird turtle. For some reason, it didn’t hurt to raise my knee while lying on my back, only when standing or sitting. 

I decided that I was bored with bed, and that Sunday’s rest could be accomplished downstairs on the couch. Easier access to the kitchen. 

I’d made the trip with the laptop and laptop table upstairs on Friday night in one trip, so I assumed the return trip could also be done only in one trip. The laptop table was on the floor, laptop on top, so I knelt down to lift it.

And then there was Pain. 

Blinding, hot, white pain in all directions from The Spot in my back. It reached all the way up to my arms- to the point that I dropped the laptop table because I couldn’t grip it with my hands. I remember just praying that I hadn’t broken the laptop, because I did not have the money to replace it just now, not to mention everything I would lose on it, if I had (the laptop is fine, just FYI). 

A note I didn’t mention is that I’d bought a new bed for the new house, but it hadn’t arrived yet (Fun Fact: it would not arrive until February. It was November). So I was sleeping on a mattress on the floor. 

Upon which I now fell like I was a stunt person diving into a crash mat. My whole back was spasming, and I was seeing black spots. 

I lay there gasping for breath and taking slow and steady breaths, hoping I wasn’t about to either pass out (given that I live alone and have never passed out before) or throw up (because that is just very unpleasant and I wasn’t sure how I’d make it to the toilet for that). 

I only knew two things then:

This was not my normal back pain.

Something was very, very wrong. 

I eventually got up. I feel like I might have tried to get up and had another spasm, I don’t remember now. I do know that when I did get up, I had to be on my stomach and then get up onto my hands and knees and somehow stood up that way. 

I made my way slowly downstairs, got down onto the couch and then realised that I didn’t think I’d be able to get up again. 

I debated whether or not to call an ambulance. But I didn’t feel like this was an emergency enough for that. 

So I called a colleague who lives a few streets away, who I didn’t think would mind coming to help me. But she didn’t answer. 

So I called my friend, who I work with but lives on the other side of town, some 30-40 minutes away depending on traffic. She answered and said she was just wrapping Christmas presents. 

Me: (paraphrasing because I don’t remember my exact words) Can I ask a big favour? I’ve done something to my back, and I can’t really move and I don’t think I can drive myself to the hospital.

Thankfully, she and her partner came ASAP.

The hospital is like a five minute drive from my house (another reason I wasn’t super keen to call an ambulance; even for that small a distance, the ambulance bill is a few hundred dollars. I do have ambulance cover in my health insurance, but still… I could move. So, I could get to the hospital myself- well, almost by myself. Inconveniencing my friend seemed the better option than inconveniencing the paramedics, who may be needed at an actual emergency, right?). 

I couldn’t walk very fast and bending down hurt, but we got me into the car. I needed help putting on my seatbelt because I couldn’t turn, nor could I reach out to pull the door closed.

I can’t really describe the pain succinctly that I felt from sitting down just for that five minute drive. It was kind of a pressure in The Spot, one that radiated down into my legs and also up. But it also kind of felt like a lock, like the spine was locking into place. It got heavier the longer I sat, until I was sure that if I sat any longer, I’d no longer be able to get up. 

Getting into the hospital was fine. I walked slowly. Although I remember my foot catching slightly on some uneven pavement and I stumbled and that was a sharp jolt up my spine. 

The triage nurse invited me to sit when it was my turn, and I had to say “no, I can’t.”

It was a wait of… maybe an hour? I don’t know. Long enough for me to feel bad that my friends were giving up their Sunday to sit with me. I think I offered to let them go, if they wanted but they stayed (in hindsight, thank God they stayed). The triage nurse did bring me some pain meds, but I didn’t feel like they did much and so I stayed standing. 

I didn’t sit again until I got in to see the doctor. I told him everything, and he said it was a muscle spasm. 

“Rest. Heat. I’ll give you a script.”

It didn’t feel like a muscle spasm, but I am not a doctor, so what do I know? 

I was only sitting for a minute or two by then, but once he left to get me the meds, I had to stand. Again, it was that feeling of “If I don’t stand right this minute, I’m not going to be able to get up.” Getting up wasn’t easy, but I did it. 

I went back to my friends and told them, so we decided to swing by the shop to fill the script before returning home. Again, the shop is a maximum five minute drive from the hospital and my house. When I can move, I’m able to walk it in 20-30 minutes. 

But by the time we pulled up to the front of the building (it was decided to drop me off before parking the car, because the parking spots are not the widest and it was a busy spot, my back was on fire. 

I have no idea how long we sat there, but eventually I managed to kind of sideways shuffle out of the car. There was a safety pole nearby (pictured above) and I kind of fell onto it, because I couldn’t stand. I couldn’t straighten up. 

It was the end of November, so it was warm but not quite summer yet. I was wearing thin sweatpants, a long sleeved t-shirt and a light cardigan. And I felt so warm, standing there hunched over that pole and I was seeing spots again. I remember staring at the concrete floor and just wanting to lie down on it- not a thought I regularly have about a dirty floor outside. 

My friends got me a shopping cart to lean on, and we headed (well, shuffled) inside. I couldn’t do more than shuffle. I think we got about thirty feet inside? And I just couldn’t walk anymore. 

My local shops, rather than hard benches, have soft ottomans in the middle of the aisles for people to sit on (pictured above) . There was one right near us, and it looked comfy. I worked out that I could shuffle sideways with a lot less pain, so we did that while we waited for the ambulance to arrive and managed to lie on it. Which helped a lot with the pain. 

When the paramedics arrived, they gave me one of those green whistles, which has Penthrox in it (drugs. Good drugs). I’ve seen them used on those TV ambulance shows and Bondi Rescue, and I’d seen people get all relaxed and kinda high on them, so I trusted that they worked. To be honest, I don’t remember feeling much of a difference. 

But they got me onto the stretcher and then into the ambulance. Every jostle hurt my back. 

To be honest, the ER wasn’t that much more helpful this time than they’d been half an hour earlier when I’d left. I saw the same doctor, and it was clear that he still thought it was a muscle spasm. But because I could not move, they couldn’t send me home this time. 

So they gave me pain meds. Really good pain meds. 

By that night, I could gingerly roll onto my stomach, but I couldn’t get onto my hands and knees. 

There were no beds available in the ward, so they moved me to the maternity ward for the night. The best night sleep I had in the hospital, honestly. 

I feel like the story gets quite boring from here, to be honest, so I’ll sum it up pretty quick. Hospitals are very boring places. And I was in a room with people who were also in pain and made a lot of noise (I am a “suffer in silence” type for the most part). They were very concerned about my bladder (because you know, back injuries), but because I couldn’t get up to use the bathroom, their next idea was a bedpan. 

This next part may be TMI, but the point of me writing this is to demonstrate what this was like, so… yeah. Otherwise, skip this paragraph. First of all, lifting my hips to get the bedpan underneath was hell. My right hip felt like… you know when you fall asleep on your hand or something and it goes numb and you can’t move it? It was like that. Except it wasn’t numb, because I could feel it. It just didn’t want to lift when my brain told it to (For the next two months if I wanted to roll onto my left side, I had to put my hands under my right hip and physically lift it myself). The bedpan was a no-go (apparently not uncommon in people my age) so the next step was a catheter. Also super fun and not mortifying at all. 

On Monday, when I still couldn’t move, they said they’d give me an MRI the next day. So I didn’t do much on Monday. They had me on endone, which made my head all fuzzy, so I probably dozed most of the day. Maybe read (thank goodness for my Kindle app). The thing about hospitals is that it’s a very lonely place, despite you constantly being surrounded by people. And the timing of my injury (ie. the end of the school term) meant everyone I know in town was busy and burnt out, so I felt bad asking anyone to come visit me. I’d kinda hoped my parents would offer to come down and see me, but they didn’t. And to be fair, I didn’t ask them. Mostly because if they’d said anything but “yes” I would have broken down, and I was doing an excellent job (I felt at least) at holding myself together. 

Tuesday I had the MRI, and shock horror- it wasn’t a muscle spasm. It was a bulging disc, between my L5 and S1 vertebrae. Pictured here (note- the pic isn’t my actual spine, it is from Google. Because no one in the past year has ever thought I should be able to see my own injury, apparently. But it’s the same injury in the same spot). Where the black bit in between the vertebrae has bled out into the light grey bit? Yeah, it’s not supposed to do that. 

So that explained all the pain. The hospital physio came and saw me and said that this is pretty common injury, no reason I shouldn’t recover fully, but also that it could cause problems further down the line, namely if I ever get pregnant. So yeah… another reason I won’t be doing that. 

By Wednesday I was able to stand. Kind of. Slowly and it hurt, and I needed help, but the physio was able to get me on my feet briefly. The thing I learned then was that it was easier for me to get up when the bed was high, but much easier for me to get down when the bed was lower. I don’t know why, but there’s probably a reason for it. I already knew that any adjustments to the bed had to be done slowly- we learned that the hard way, after several nurses tried to help by adjusting the bed to either sitting up or lying down. I got out of hospital on Thursday, once I could stand and walk well enough that I could take care of myself at home (namely, getting up and down stairs and in and out of bed).

I had some very helpful friends from work who helped me with things at home- groceries, errands, etc. I needed help to do laundry, because I couldn’t lift the hamper, nor could I bend down to get the clothes out of the washing machine once they’d been washed and hang them out on the clothesline. Colleagues and friends who are willing to help you do laundry are the real MVPs. 

Christmas was the other worry. My family lives 3-3.5 hours from me, and Christmas is always held at my sister’s place. I’d missed Christmas in 2020 because of COVID, so the idea of missing another family Christmas wasn’t ideal. When I originally mentioned this to my parents, they said “you’ll just have to drive really slowly and take a lot of breaks. So maybe it will take you six hours instead of three.” I wasn’t keen on that idea, especially because my right leg and hip was an especially painful area. I mentioned it to my doctor, and she said “you should not be driving anywhere that far right now. As a passenger with lots of breaks, maybe. Not as a driver.”

And my parents’ response to that was “oh, well I guess we’ll have to sort something out then” and when I suggested it might just be easier for me to stay home, then guilted me for not coming home for Christmas “again”. It was eventually decided that my dad would drive down and collect me and then drive me back home after Christmas. 

I was only home for a few days, and my family also made me feel bad about how short my stay was. But, my brother and one of my sisters both live at home, so when I visit my parents I sleep on the couch in the sunroom and my brother has a dog who loves to jump on people. Neither of these things are great with a back injury. 

With a bulging disc injury, the main thing for recovery is time. Which I am not great with. I started physio on my back in January, and finished in July- at least for now. I ended up seeing a new physio for this. I’d been seeing one (for a different issue), but she went on maternity leave at the same time this happened, and her replacement… I saw her three times between leaving the hospital and Christmas, and she wouldn’t touch my back and just talked a lot about how pain was mostly in our heads and was tied to our emotions. The third time, it was a bad day and all she kept telling me was to sit with the pain and breathe through it. Screw that. 

I did a Google search and found another local physio who did remedial massage, who miraculously had an appointment free the next day. I saw her, shuffled into the room and she took one look at me and said “yep, it’s your sciatica.” She gave me a massage and at the end, I could actually walk out of the room, almost normally. She recommended another physio in the practice who could help my injury, and that’s who I saw for the next seven months. 

I wore heels for the first time in September and could have cried because it felt normal (although I was very careful). My back still gets stiff and tight a lot quicker than it did, especially if I’m sitting for long periods or walking for long periods (but it did that before too). I think I’m more just aware of it all now. 

Anyway, if there’s any point to this story beyond explaining what happened to me, it is to really appreciate your lower back and be very careful when lifting things. Trust your gut when your body tells you something isn’t right, something isn’t normal. 

[girltomboy]

Right so this week feels like the longest week this year so far, it just feels like it should be the weekend already no way it's only been FOUR days of it. I'm not a fan of this part of February at all, doesn't feel like the shortest month of the year. But we'll manage, we'll get to the end of it safely; and what awaits us there? Fucking MARCH!! Holy shit spring is so close I feel like I can just reach out and touch it. Even though technically it only truly begins once Aries season hits. We can still enjoy the symbolism of it all methinks. Anyway, a water pipe exploded at my office and we had to work from home this week. Kind of a bummer for me because I was SO excited to finally reunite with my work friend (and possibly meet our new coworker too who's not that new anymore and everyone hates her for various reasons apparently lol), but we might have a movie marathon this Sunday.

Also, this week I made a green pea stew with veggies and chicken, and it actually came out incredible. I was craving it and there are usually ready-made portions at the store, but I wasn't sure if I'd find any of this specific dish, and also I was kind of in the mood to cook something myself. Finding a thorough recipe that included all the ingredients I wanted was a fucking headache, but I managed to put everything together nicely and I had it for dinner for like 3 or 4 days (just finished it today actually). And I didn't even get tired of it cause, well, it's really fucking delicious what can I say. And it was easy to prepare too, so I'll probably remake it next week. I've been in a highly gourmand mood lately, specifically with these charcuterie boards I've been making this week in the evenings. And I'm planning on researching more funky recipes for the weekend. I'm kind of craving some pizza for tomorrow evening, I've been wanting a Crunchwrap Supreme for THEEE longest time, but I never find myself in the right mood to go all the way to the mall. And idk if Taco Bell even delivers, but I prefer to get my own food, even if I take it to go. So, idk tomorrow it might be pizza time, it might be adventure quest time. I just hope it's gonna be sunny and nice again. Today we finally have some decent sunlight in what feels like an eternity. I can't wait to go for a little walk, the sun no longer sets as soon as I finish work and I can get a decent half hour of sunny outdoor time.

My bf got fired from his not-job, the boss lady apparently came to the store one day and told him it'd be best if he didn't show up anymore, because he wasn't "good with the register". My bf was actually starting to get the hang of it, without any training whatsoever, plus he did like 4 days' worth of totally free labor. 🙄 And then he got another interview for a call center, and they made him call actual real-life customers to promote some event business they had. And mind you, these were randomly generated numbers from some shady database, idk it was overall so scammy. AND IT WAS FREE LABOR AGAIN for basically what was supposed to be A JOB INTERVEW after which he was rejected, ofc. Like how the fuck are these employers getting so bold nowadays, making applicants work for free only to then send them home. Fuuuuck off and don't ever say shit like "nobody wants to work" anymore.

[thisaintascenereviews]

Usher - Hard II Love / “A”

It’s been 27 years since Usher released his debut album, 1997’s My Way, when he was just 16-years-old, but his career has had its ups and downs since then. Like a lot of artists, Usher has reinvented his career a few times over, including now. He’s making his comeback this year, whether it’s releasing a new album in a few days, or performing at the Super Bowl this weekend. Like with Justin Timberlake, and Man Of The Woods, I wanted to take a look back at Usher’s last record, 2016’s Hard II Love. I also wanted to include the 2018 collaborative album, “A,” with producer Zaytoven, because that’s technically his last album, although it’s not even a half hour, so I don’t know whether to count it, but we’ll get to that later. I really wanted to talk about Hard II Love, and this album’s place in his discography. At this point, Usher was an elder statesman, having already been around for almost 20 years, but his sound has changed with the times. His music from the early 00s, such as 2004’s Confessions, really helped to influence the R&B at the time, but his albums from the late 2000s and early 2012s moved into pop and electronic sounds. I personally don’t care for that, and most of those albums, while fine, they don’t fit Usher’s voice or sound. He’s got a classic R&B crooner voice, and he works well with that type of sound, not club ready pop music.

Hard II Love was delayed for a couple of years before its release, but this album is interesting, because it comes four years later off his last album, and it also marks a shift in his sound back to the classic R&B that he’s known for. It also has him moving into hip-hop a bit, as a lot of R&B began to have a symbiotic relationship with hip-hop more so. It always has, but by this point, the lines were really blurred. Usher also helped to bolster both his own image and the image of some newer artists for the time that appear on the album, including Future and Young Thug. Both of those artists are big names today, and by this point in their careers, they’re some of the old guard now. It was cool for Usher for showcase them on this album, and this album was very much a return to his Atlanta roots. Both Future and Young Thug are from Atlanta as well, so he wanted to put some local talent on the map, but this record really does blur the line between hip-hop and R&B. It features a good mix of his classic balladry, as well as some R&B tracks, and hip-hop adjacent songs.

I was pretty mixed on this album when it came out, but I also wasn’t familiar that much with Usher and his legacy / influence on R&B, and I think context matters sometimes when it comes to these established acts. Songs like “No Limit,” which features Young Thug, “Rivals,” which features Future, or “Make U A Believer” are more on the hip-hop side, whereas songs like “Missin’ U,” “Stronger,” or “Downtime” are some solid R&B cuts that show off Usher’s voice quite well. Before I go any further, I probably should talk about how I feel about this record, along with “A,” and despite being mixed on the album when it originally came out, I actually quite enjoy this album now. I wouldn’t say Hard II Love is a masterpiece, but it’s not true of its namesake. This album is quite easy to love, really, but it is a bit too long. It clocks in at around an hour, but this album didn’t need to be that long. I do enjoy a lot of the songs here, as they move between R&B, hip-hop, and even a bit of alternative R&B that started popping up at the time. It’s just that the album repeats itself a lot, despite not being bad, so the album almost runs out of steam at the 3/4 mark, but it’s still enjoyable.

As for “A,” the album he put out with Zaytoven, I like this record, too, but this one doubles down on the hip-hop sound and Usher sounds like the newcomers, versus one of the veterans. He does have his moments with songs that sound like stuff you’d hear in his repertoire, but he employs more of a braggadocios sound, as well as his lyricism. It sort of works, but it’s weird to hear him with lyrics that are more aggressive, versus of the more romantic variety. I will say, however, that he does sound great, both on this and Hard II Love. He is the best part of his music, which is how it should be, but whenever you listen to an Usher song or album, the best part of it is usually his voice. Hard II Love, in particular, is a great return to form for his voice. This is the best he had sounded in a long time, especially moving back to instrumentation that fits his voice. He’s one of the best R&B singers, both of today’s current crop, and of all time. Even when his material isn’t as good, or when Hard II Love or “A” specifically aren’t anything special, you can always count on Usher to sound great. He surely sounds amazing on his new material, so if there’s one thing I want people to take away from this review, it’s that I’m excited for his new album and these albums are pretty good.

[purplesurveys]

1757

What can you smell right now?   I can't really make out a scent in my room.

What was the last thing you bought online?   Heh, just K-pop albums. Got Jungkook's album, all versions as usual.

If you drink coffee, when was the last time you went a day without having one?   I think there was a day sometime last week where I didn't have the time to fix myself a cup.

Do you have any appointments coming up?   Not til the next month.

Do you put appointments in your phone's calendar app to remember them?   Nah, I just backread through my chat threads since that's usually how I book appointments now.

Will you be visiting anyone's house in the next week or so?   I doubt it. The only other house I visit these days (besides family) is Angela's, and we don't have any plans made any time soon.

Have you ever been to a petting zoo? What animals did you pet? I haven't been to one and don't think I'll ever be interested in visiting.

What was the last movie you saw in theatres?   It wasn't a movie, but the last thing I booked tickets for was BTS' Busan concert. I don't really feel the urgency to catch anything else in the theatres since they'll usually be out in no time in any one of the streaming services anyway.

Do you know anyone who has done a PhD?   Apart from a number of my professors, no one I know personally.

How many unread emails are in your inbox right now? On my personal email, a little under 2,200. I always clear out my work emails so it's always at 0, but I would guess that anywhere between 2-5 would've come in today (Saturday). I just don't check it during weekends because that's one of the things I need to do to keep my sanity in check.

What four apps do you keep on the home bar on your iPhone? (Sorry, I'm not sure if Android has an equivalent!)  Contacts, Safari, Photos, Messages.

Have you ever used Tumblr? Do you still use it today?   Well yes, that's what I'm using to post this.

Are you tired right now?   A little bit, but I worked all afternoon + attended a party tonight so even though I'm a bit buzzed while taking this LOL I wanted some me time so here we are.

What's your favourite day of the week and why?   Friday. It just makes me happy and puts me in such a calm state.

How far away is the nearest major city?   Manila would be a good 1.5 hours away, even with no traffic. It's just so damn far which is why I always hate having to go there. So polluted and chaotic, too.

If you ever find yourself visiting the Philippines, I'll be the first to tell you there's nothing to miss if you're skipping out on Manila. In fact my #1 advice is to please just stay away from Manila. If you can't escape Metro Manila just go to BGC or Poblacion lol.

Do you own an electric kettle?   Nope.

Are your eyebrows wispy or bushy?   They're bushy.

Have you ever lost your wallet or purse? Did you have to replace a bunch of things?   I've lost a wallet once, but it didn't bother me all too much because I was in high school and had probably like only all of P200 on there.

Where are you right now? Describe the room or place to me.   I'm in my bedroom. It's technically the smallest room in the house but I like it because it feels very private/intimate – when entering, you'll immediately be greeted by a loft bed, wherein the stairs also double as cubbyholes where I've stored my K-pop merch. Directly below my bed is my work station and also a small 'sofa' which is really just two foldable sleeping bags bunched together; right across is my TV and TV stand which come with shelves, also home to more of my merch.

Do you prefer big dogs or small dogs?   I love all dogs but I am admittedly more likely to baby big dogs.

Are you good at understanding heavy accents? Which accents would you say you're the best at understanding?   I'm terrible with understanding accents. It's why I need subtitles all the time, even if what I'm watching is already in English. I don't think there is one accent I understand more than others, either.

Have you ever played on a real life pinball machine, or just on the computer?   I've played both IRL and computer-game pinball.

Do you have a lot of word documents or notes on your computer?   So many. The Notes app is my lifeline.

What's your favourite Ben & Jerry's flavour?   I never get B&J because they're so expensive.

Have you ever been to a school reunion? How was it?   Yes – we had our first and last (so far) reunion in around 2017, a year after we graduated. I remember having fun, although I cannot remember what exactly we did there. I imagine a present-day reunion would be even more fun considering so many of us have since gotten into K-pop, hah.

How many nights a week do you generally cook at home?   I don't cook.

What colour are the street signs in your neighbourhood? Are they the same all over town or do they vary? They're green text on a white background. No, it's different per subdivision.

Do you have good grammar and punctuation skills?   I would say so, yes. At work they always have me as an SOS line for any copywriting-related concerns lol.

Have you ever tried vegan chicken? Did you like it? I don't think I have, but I'm open to trying!

[evereinefaust]

*.·:·.✧ 𝐋𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐇𝐞𝐫𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐢𝐨𝐫𝐬! ✧.·:·.*

It was a fine weekend in the [L/n] household. Today was one of the rare occasions where the three siblings, their cousin, and even a childhood friend were relaxing inside the house — away from any pressures of work or the responsibilities of school. [Y/n] and Cannae were in the living room, in their usual spot in front of the television. They were playing a multiplayer game on the switch since earlier the day. Meanwhile, Rouin was reading a novel on an adjacent loveseat, drinking his cup of tea and away from the rowdy girls. And as for the twins, Dietrich just got up from his afternoon nap, now descending the stairs while Zelda was preparing some snacks in the kitchen.

"You two are still playing?" the ravenette let out a tired yawn as he finally arrived at the first floor. His half-lidded eyes took notice the girls' attention was still focused on the big screen. "Don't you think it's about time you two stop and rest?"

"No," was [Y/n]'s flat response, not even batting an eye at her older brother.

Dietrich sweatdropped. Shrugging, he then took a seat on the adjacent couch. "Fine. Suit yourself."

"You know how [Y/n] gets when she's too focused on her games," Zelda walked into the room holding a tray of snacks and fruit juice. She sets the tray on the coffee table and transferred the items to it. Her onyx hues glanced sternly at her younger sister. "Come on, you two. Pause the game for a while and take a break."

"Your sister's right. You're not even wearing your glasses while playing," Rouin pointed out from behind his book.

That was enough to make the two girls stop. Begrudgingly pausing the game, [Y/n] sighed in resignation and looked down at the game controller in her hands, a frown on her face. Cannae placed down her controller as well, stretching her limbs a bit before grabbing a sandwich from the plate. The [h/c]-haired girl stood up and stretched her whole body as well, before plopping down on the sofa next to her cousin and grabbing a sandwich.

"I thought you finished Fire Emblem Warriors before?" Dietrich asked, curiously glancing at the television and then at his younger sister.

"Not yet," the girl responded. "Technically, we finished the main story, but not everything in the game."

"Earlier, we played through Age of Calamity for about two hours, then we switched to Nine Parchments after we got bored for a while. And when we were halfway through the map, I took a break while [Y/n] played BoTW. I joined her trying to complete FE Warriors after lunch," Cannae explained, happily munching on the sandwich.

 "You're really gonna 100% it?"

[Y/n] gave her brother a judging look, raising a brow. "Duh. What do you take me for?"

The black-haired adult face-palmed. "You know what? Never mind — forget I asked."

"I sometimes admire your completionist mindset," Zelda mused, smiling.

After setting a tray of sandwiches on Rouin's table, Zelda sat next to her twin. She poured glasses of [f/j] for the four of them before reaching for the apple turnover that was set up in the middle. Her eyes briefly gazed at the pause screen before focusing on her younger sister who was happily munching on her favorite snack. Zelda's expression softened slightly.

"Are you girls enjoying the food?" she asked casually.

"Oh yeah!" the greenette exclaimed, swallowing the bite in her mouth.

[Y/n] smiled widely. "Thank you so much for making this for us, sis. It's amazing."

"You're welcome. It's been a while since I prepare food in the kitchen, after all."

"By the way," [Y/n] spoke, eyeing her older twin siblings. "It's also been a while since the two of you don't have any work to do on the weekends."

Dietrich hummed. "Go on."

"Will you play with me, big sis, big bro?" And there she goes, pleading with her older siblings with her puppy eyes.

The two ravenettes sweatdropped while Cannae stifled a laugh. Even Rouin had a small smile behind his cup upon witnessing the interaction between them. Dietrich and Zelda exchanged glances. It was like they were telepathically communicating before both of them nodded in unison.

"Alright, but just for a short while," the ravenette woman said.

"Yay!"

"Finish your eating first, [N/n]."

"Of course, big bro~"

After finishing their afternoon snack, [Y/n] resumed playing. But this time, with her siblings. Since the Musou games the young [h/c]ette had were only for two players, Dietrich was the first to play with her. His twin proceeded on cleaning the table and wash the dishes while Cannae and the male switched places for her to take a nap on the other couch. As for Rouin, he decided to rest upstairs.

"You're really into Musou games, aren't you?" Dietrich mused, his eyes focused on the television screen.

His younger sister shrugged. "Well, I like games where I don't have to think and worry about strategizing. That's why I like hack-and-slash games where I just button-mash to kill enemies. Besides, it's fun!"

The adult sweatdropped, nevertheless, a smile emerged on his face. "Is that what you like about it?"

"Of course, not! I also like the story and the characters. Especially with their move sets."

"Mhm. I see."

In a moment, Zelda entered and sat on [Y/n]'s other side, watching them play from the sidelines. "How many Musou games did you play already?"

"Hm..." the girl pursed her lips in thought, tilting her head as well. "I played FE Warriors, Hyrule Warriors Definitive Edition, and Age of Calamity."

"That's a lot," the woman commented.

"Indeed," her twin seconded.

[Y/n] rolled her eyes. "Nah, that's still not enough. I've yet to play the other ones as well."

"God, there's still more?" Dietrich groaned. Just the thought of his little sister pestering him to buy multiple games is giving him a headache. "Don't you think you have enough games to play?"

"There's also Touken Ranbu Warriors, Fire Emblem: Three Hopes, and Persona 5: Strikers," the younger girl completely ignored her older brother's complaints and continued with her explanation. "I wanted to play those as well..."

"I can see the appeal of Musou games. To even have a spin-off of many big franchises like the Fire Emblem series, fans must've loved the genre," Zelda remarked.

"Yup!" a bright grin appeared on the youngest's lips, cheeks tinted pink. "Also, did you two know that Touken Ranbu and Fire Emblem are originally turn-based strategy games?"

"I've voiced a character in Fire Emblem, so yeah, I knew. But I didn't know about Touken Ranbu," Dietrich replied.

"Man~" [Y/n] slumped into the couch, exhaling. She then leaned against her older brother's shoulder. "If the developers of Fire Emblem and Touken Ranbu were able to make a Musou spin-off of their franchise, do you think Clover will also make a hack-and-slash spin-off of LOH?"

"That would be interesting," the woman said.

[Y/n] grinned at her sister. "I know, right?"

"If they wanted to. Well, LOH is a mobile game so I'm unsure whether it will become as big as those games," the male ravenette remarked.

"It would truly be cool to see LOH in a Musou-styled game. I would like to see each character's move set in a progressing fighting game," the girl mused, [e/c] eyes filled with excitement at the possibility. "Also, it reminds me of the game trailer where everyone was facing each other. Krom was so cool when using his burst skill!"

"How about pitching in the idea, [N/n]?" Zelda suggested. "Maybe someday after the devs finish what they're planning for the game they could hear you out."

Dietrich nodded in agreement. "That's right."

"Mhm. Sure," the youngest agreed, grinning brightly. "Maybe I could become one of the creative team as well, hehe~"

"Don't get ahead of yourself," the man snickered, nudging the girl who was leaning against his shoulder. She just chuckled.

"I could think of two ways they would make it. One, they could convert the base game into Musou-style. Same main story plot but just hack-and-slash. Second, they could make a completely new story featuring the same characters."

The ravenette woman was amazed by her words. "Wow, you really thought this through, huh?"

[Y/n] glanced in her sister's direction and smirked. "Of course, I love LOH, after all. And seeing a Musou game of it would be a dream come true."

"Now you got me interested. Who would the player play as?" Dietrich asked.

"The two of you would not be playable since the Lord isn't a fighter," she smirked, [e/c] hues glinting with ridicule. "You two are basically useless in a Musou game."

"Ouch," Dietrich frowned as Zelda chuckled at the exchange.

The three continued on with their simple pastime. They talked about various topics relating to games. [Y/n] divulged to her siblings her ideas of a LOH Musou game and the two would often ask questions. This continued on until later in the evening — just them playing together and chatting. And [Y/n] was more than happy to be able to spend a such precious weekend with her family. The family was contented. Their time was spent peacefully.

[nahaszap]

The best ssd for macbook pro 2012

#The best ssd for macbook pro 2012 pro#

I compared the Retina Display MBP's results to the Toshiba and Samsung based SSDs in last year's MacBook Air: I ran our four-corners Iometer test suite, looking at low queue depth sequential read/write and random/read write. How well does the new Samsung based SSD compare to previous Apple offerings? It's like night and day. Similar to the desktop PM830 drive there's a single 256MB DDR2 DRAM on-board acting as a cache and scratch area for the controller. By using eight, octal-die packages in the case of the 512GB drive, Apple is able to deliver the maximum performance the controller allows. At 8GB per NAND die, you're looking at the highest density MLC NAND available on the market today at 64GB per package. The larger physical dimensions of the SSD allowed Apple to accommodate a total of eight flash packages (at least in the 512GB model). In the Retina MacBook Pro, Apple standardized on a dual-sided PCB for the SSD. Samsung's PM830 is quite honestly the best behaved SSD controller I have used under OS X, it is no surprise that Apple chose it. I suspect we'll see 3rd party vendors produce SSD upgrades in the future, but unlike previous Apple SSDs, performance won't be a reason to want to upgrade. Keep in mind that although the interface is electrically SATA, it is not physically SATA or mSATA or any other standardized interface - this is entirely Apple's own creation. It's no surprise that Apple changed the connector for this year. Apple maintained a very high pin pitch on the 2011 MacBook Air SSD connector, and I had heard a number of complaints about that connector from those who have tried designing with it. The dimensions of the SSD's PCB are physically different than the gumstick form factor used in the MacBook Pro, however the connector may be physically compatible with the 2012 MacBook Air SSD (similar pinout). The SSD is on the left towards the middle of the motherboard

#The best ssd for macbook pro 2012 pro#

The SSD in the Retina Display MacBook Pro is technically removable, it exists on a separate PCB held in by a single screw as you can see from the iFixit-supplied image below: Just like in previous designs, Apple runs its own custom firmware on its SSDs. I can only assume a TS prefix will stand for Toshiba once again. Just as before, the SM prefix stands for Samsung. I can now confirm that the PM830 is indeed what is used in Apple's SM512E SSD. In my initial look at the Retina Display MacBook Pro's storage performance I hypothesized that the SM512E part number in my review system was a drive based on Samsung's PM830 controller (the OEM version of what's used in the Samsung SSD 830). Apple is now using 6Gbps SSD controllers from both Toshiba and Samsung, allowing it to claim support for up to 500MB/s sequential read speed. Unlike previous Apple SSDs, the 2012 lineup sees a significant speed bump. We know at least one of those options is a Toshiba part, while another option is Samsung - similar to how things have worked in recent history. Despite the different, all three systems share the same selection of SSD controllers. The traditional MacBook Pro as well as the MacBook Air still refer to their storage as Solid State Drives. Apple is careful to refer to the SSD in the next-generation MacBook Pro as "all-flash storage" instead of a solid state drive. The 2012 MacBook Air, 2012 MacBook Pro and next-generation MacBook Pro all feature updated solid state storage. One of the top items on my to-do list was to hammer on Apple's new SSD. After a week in Taiwan, and a weekend in San Francisco, I'm finally back home and hard at work on the Retina Display MacBook Pro Review.