#i hear you i really do

[prettybabybaby]

Idc what anyone says, Eddie is a charismatic little perv who’s the worlds most fuckable loser. He gets no bitches just because of his D&D association. Even band and theater kids don’t fuck with him because they’re too intimidated. Due to the lack of action, mr dungeon master over here resorts to fist fucking any piece of female underwear (that he swipes from friend’s laundry) shit quality pornos and the most basic gas station magazines neatly tucked in the corner under his bed

¡ 18+ only ! ¡ minors do not interact !

okay i got way too into this one

¡ stranger things masterlist !

please he was ecstatic when he turned 18 because he could finally buy his own magazines. he's def a regular the gas station. his favorite pages in the magazines are the ones with models who look somewhat like the girl he drools over — you — and he jerks off relentlessly, ruining the pages. he probably flips through the pages, finding the stiff page covered in his semen — he really needs a new one — and gets off after catching the slightest glimpse of the tops of your thighs or something. it takes close to nothing to get him going because he's so sexually frustrated and desperate. and with you being so pretty, he has no choice but to cum looking at a photo of a woman who could never measure up to you.

[littlelightfish]

Funny things I found out playing with language setting in Netflix while looking episode 15:

Chilchuck's scream sounds HAUNTED in brazilian portuguese. Give it a try if you can.

(You can hear it here)

In spanish dub, Senshi says: "tocó mis senos de hombre", which means "he touched my man boobs" in Spanish. And I think that's the best dub line one so far.

[giantkillerjack]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

[kizzer55555]

The Vampire Aesthetic

Ok so Danny knows two billionaires personally and they really couldn’t be more different. Yet they had one thing in common. A vampire aesthetic. Sam is fully into goth. Spiderwebs, bats, the color black. She enjoys fangs and fake blood and the darkness of her soul. Meanwhile, Vlad is Vlad. If his name wasn’t enough, the dark clothing, pale skin, and flying around with a cape and fangs with coffins in his mansion really sells it.

Danny doesn’t know many rich people so he thinks this might be some kind of trend. (If Paulina is rich, her family likes the chupacabra) So he just thinks that all rich people have some kind of vampire thing going on.

Cue Danny somehow ending in the Wayne household. Maybe he was brought over as a friend of one of the bats, maybe rescued from a field trip/vacation gone wrong, maybe some other situation. But he is there in civilian form with civilian Waynes and Danny just takes a good long look around the inside of the mansion.

“So where’s the vampire aesthetic?

Everyone freezes.

Danny just starts looking around, checking behind paintings and feeling the walls for secret levers. Used to secret passages with Vlad and possibly Sam. The Fentons definitely had them when they were temporarily rich.

“Come on, I know you guys are hiding it.”

Cue the entire batfamily thinking that this is another Tim and that he is fully aware that these people are the batfamily. Danny hangs around the mansion more and the bats just start dropping their disguises and not even bothering to hide stuff around Danny because they assume he already knows. (Possibly even trying to recruit him to be a new bat) Meanwhile, Danny, who does not know these people are batman and his birds, just does not pick up on any of it.

He grew up in a health violation with a giant ballon observatory lab above his head and a portal to the afterlife in his basement. He is a half dead teenager who has tea with the god of time and his godfather is the other parent to his clone child. He’s used to death lazers being scattered across his home and mysterious stains on clothing.

People are weird! He doesn’t judge!

[its-the-ratdawg]

Hannibal fans who don't believe in hannigram are so funny to me. bc dude. if they're not in love. what the fuck was all that (the entire show) even about???

[alluralater]

“i need to cum” “i need you to go faster” i need i need i need. no. what you need is to shut your pretty mouth and keep your eyes on mine. full focus right here, baby. i want you to watch as i slide my thumb between your lips, pulling your jaw up and closed. you can suck on it. go ahead. but you’d better keep those fucking eyes on me. you’ve forgotten yourself, and your manners as well. mmm but don’t worry, darling. i have a mind to put you in your place just like this. i won’t even have to lift a finger. now spread your legs and touch yourself for me. go on, don’t be shy. i’ll tell you exactly what to do. and if you please me, maybe i’ll touch you, too. maybe. show me you deserve it. say please <3

[arsenicflame]

Bonus round! Do you use a queue tag?

[sergle]

You!! Hey you!! Are you looking for a pair of kittens? Do you live In Or Near Oklahoma? Do you wish you could listen to purring all the time? Do you want a cat that looks like an aye-aye?

long story short, we found these two kittens at the bottom of a garbage can!! I don't like to think about how they ended up in there- but we heard them crying while on a walk, and it's very lucky they were so loud! They were scared at first, but now they NEED to be snuggled at all times. Crazy how adaptable kittens are. I'd prefer to rehome them as a pair, but I'd consider adopting them out individually if that's my only option! Please IM me if you're interested in both/either of these babies, or if you have any questions at all!!

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Good morning, Sleepyhead.

[First] Prev <–-> Next

[omnomnb]

hey guys i've been thinking (bad sign)

anyway. you COULD totally just slap them all in the middle and it'd work but i've chosen contemplation so here are my elaborations. obvs take a grain of salt with the undateables since we still don't know them as well

i will kill for you

barbatos and satan are confident enough in how far they're willing to go to keep you safe that the idea of them needing to die for you doesn't come up

belphie has to stay alive for beel

asmo does not want to die

all of the above are decent at taking care of themselves already (but will try harder for you if need be)

i will die for you

literally look at how undyingly loyal mephisto is to the royal family. to him it is noble to die for those you love and that is an ideal engraved in his bones

mammon does not think before acting and his first priority is always your safety rather than eliminating the threat. he doesn't think to retaliate against a blow, he only tries to take it for you

i will kill for you and die for you

raphael and beel are/were both warriors and protectors and unflinchingly ready to shed blood for their loved ones

raphael leans more to kill and beel leans more to die though. lol

i will kill for you and take care of myself for you

diavolo has to stay alive for the sake of the devildom, but he's willing to crush heads if it comes to it

thirteen walks with death and while it won't take her, she can ask it favours. the walk is lonely and she will let you join her on the path (and maybe even,,, hold your hand 😳)

i will die for you and take care of myself for you

levi isn't incapable of sending forth floods on your behalf but he's liable to impulsively think that the only thing he can do is die so that you'll at least remember him as heroic (and then remind himself that you already do)

i will kill for you, die for you, and take care of myself for you

lucifer's ego is simultaneously through the roof and six feet under. he's the best and also the worst and he'll do whatever it takes in any situation

solomon has very little that personally attaches him to this world that isn't a greater loyalty to his realm in general so he's willing to do just about anything. but also you soothe him and make his long life worth it because he met you

simeon was apparently 100% willing to risk falling for you even in s2, before he was romanceable, so he's the one whose love really transcends time. he'll both worship and disgrace himself for you without a second thought. also you make him forget his catholic guilt

[aquanutart]

[egophiliac]

LEON

LEON YOUR EYEBALLS

[scribefindegil]

As much as I adore conlangs, I really like how the Imperial Radch books handle language. The book is entirely in English but you're constantly aware that you're reading a "translation," both of the Radchaai language Breq speaks as default, and also the various other languages she encounters. We don't hear the words but we hear her fretting about terms of address (the beloathed gendering on Nilt) and concepts that do or don't translate (Awn switching out of Radchaai when she needs a language where "citizen," "civilized," and "Radchaai person" aren't all the same word) and noting people's registers and accents. The snatches of lyrics we hear don't scan or rhyme--even, and this is what sells it to me, the real-world songs with English lyrics, which get the same "literal translation" style as everything else--because we aren't hearing the actual words, we're hearing Breq's understanding of what they mean. I think it's a cool way to acknowledge linguistic complexity and some of the difficulties of multilingual/multicultural communication, which of course becomes a larger theme when we get to the plot with the Presgar Translators.

[ohitslen]

Living together.

The snail video if you are interested :)

[alpacacare-archive]

an alternative take on the “Gaster's disappearance is the reason papyrus doesn't sleep anymore” headcanon

[wistfulwatcher]

13.15 Annihilator | 17.06 Message in a Bottle