#i hope you like this!! i put my all into it ahaha only the best for you :]

[skylarsblue]

✦I have more C.o.D Quotes✦

Gaz: How’s your head? Y/N: Well, I haven’t had any complaints yet. Gaz: …excuse me? Y/N: Oh uh, I think I’ll live-

-- (Somewhere in Greece with a fuck ton of cats) Ghost, watching Price sneeze every five seconds: What a catastrophe. Gaz: No. Y/N: PFFT- Soap: Stop, no, don’t encourage him. Y/N: Ahem! Right, right. Not funny. Ghost: I am purrfectly capable of being funny. Y/N: *struggling* Gaz: Sometimes I wish you didn’t have a mouth.

-- Just a scene of Y/N taking out a bottle of whiskey, unscrewing they cap, then putting one of those lid caps on. (Like the ones you have on those fancy Gatorades) Taking a huge swig and closing the cap on it as Soap watches in amusement, & Price in fear.

-- Ghost: Quit messing with my hand. Soap: Quit messing with my hair! Y/N: Quit being gay. Gaz: PFFFT Y/N: Both problems solved.

-- Y/N, on the comms: You have thirteen seconds before the building fucking explodes you hot topic wannabe- Ghost: … Y/N: And you green gumball son of a bitch. Gaz: Wha-?! Soap: *WHEEZE* Y/N: You have done nothing but ruin my life; I hope you both die.

-- Soap, Gaz, & Y/N: *cackling* Laswell, losing at poker: I miss my wife, Price. Price: *places down cards* Laswell: I miss my wife.

-- Ghost, overstimulated & a lil drunk: AHHHHHH MY BONES Y/N: *frantically getting headphones* Soap, drunk: *wheeze* Gaz: Ah. I know I should’ve- *dies coughing* Soap: *more wheezing*

-- Graves *kicks in door* WHO POSTED MY NUDES ON TWITTER DOT COM?! Y/N: SUCK IT, BITCH BOY!! Alejandro: *aggressively slapping his leg while silently laughing* Rudy: *pointing and laughing* Valeria, in handcuffs: Ha, dumbass.

-- Graves: Bitch, you are gonna get in this car or I’m popping between ya eyes! Valeria: Hey, I know you. I saw your dick on Twitter! Graves: NOOOOOO Y/N: AHAHA!

-- Graves: C’mon Johnn- Y/N: *chucks a rock at Graves’ head* Graves: OW, WHY?! Y/N: NO JOHNNY FOR YOU! He goes by Soap and we respect that! Graves: Ghost calls him that! Y/N: CAUSE GHOST HAS PERMISSION, you EARN the right to Johnny! And I will be damned if anyone else earns the right before me. I been working my ass off to get the Johnny privilege and you will NOT get it for free! Soap, who’s just been standing there the whole time: *leans to Gaz* Have they actually been taking it that seriously? Gaz: Yeah. They’ve also been working real hard to try and get the right to call Captain “John”. Shoulda seen their face when I said they can call me Kyle. Soap: That’s…really sweet, I’ll give’em permission later. Gaz: Why not now? Soap: I wanna see that bastard get chewed out some more.

-- Y/N, perched on Price’s desk: Captain. Price: *sigh* Y/N: Captain I crave violence.

-- Ghost: Your family line deserves to die with you, only shame it didn’t end before you. Graves: ….I just sat down!

-- Y/N: You’re like…the human incarnation of crumbs in the bed. Graves: Oh c’MON THAT’S REAL MEAN Ghost: It’s true though. Y/N: The kinda crumbs that you keep swiping away but somehow they never leave- Graves: Alright! You know what- Soap: Like getting in bed after going to the beach. Gaz: Sand in the bed, yeah. Feels like that when he talks. Graves: I’M JUST GONNA FUCKIN LEAVE! Y/N: *watches him go* Annnd now the sheets have been changed. Ghost: Clean from filth. Alejandro: You all are so cruel and it’s perhaps the funniest thing I’ve ever seen.

-- Gaz: Things Gucci with you? Y/N: It’s Goodwill at best, my guy. Price: I don’t know what this means but I feel like I should be concerned.

-- (Mild NSFW Jokie Time) Gaz: You alright? You been zoned out. Y/N: Hm? Nah I’m good, just having depraved thoughts. Gaz: Depraved, you say? Soap: Oh do tell. Y/N: You just…you ever see someone and think “they have pretty eyes”. And that’s normal. But then the little devil in the back of ya skull goes “yeah they’d look good rolled back”. Or am I just a whore? Gaz: That is depraved. Soap: Got a good point though.

-- Y/N: Ooo! Look! Old pictures of Captain, this one’s dated. You would’ve been…19 in this one. Lemme s-…… Gaz: Lemme see! ….. Price: What? Y/N: …..you were a whore, weren’t you captain? Gaz: That’s the face of an arrogant bastard who fucks regularly. Price: I…might’ve been a bit of a playboy. Y/N: And I would’ve fallen for it you god damn bastard, no ones fACE SHOULD BE THAT NICE!

-- Valeria, painting her nails: I might kill my ex, not the best idea. His new girlfriend’s next- Alejandro: ….. Rudy: ….should I be worried? Alejandro: Move away quietly and pray.

-- Ghost: For the record this is self destructive. Soap, chugging his 5th energy drink in the past hour: For the record, I’m aware of that.

-- MILF!Y/N: Boys. Bed, now. I wanna talk to your captain. Price: No, boys stay. Please stay- Y/N: Go. Price: Stay. The boys: *concern, panic, perhaps a bit of fear* Y/N: Go! Price: Stay! Y/N: You go! Soap: *speed walking* Price: Soap, stay! Y/N: NOW! Gaz: *slowly backing away* Price: Gaz, don’t move! Y/N: YOU GO! Price: SIMON- Ghost: *leaving*

-- Ghost: What was Plan A? Soap: …don’t fuck up. Ghost: And what was Plan B? Gaz: Don’t fuck up Plan A. Ghost: And what did you do? Y/N: …fucked up plan a- Ghost: YOU FUCKED UP PLAN A-

-- Ghost: What’s rule number one? Soap, with dynamite: Party! Ghost: NO! No, not party! No!

-- Graves: How about after this, we get a drink? Y/N: …I would rather gouge out my eyes and blindly navigate a way to turn them into earrings than ever be anywhere alone with you. Soap, grinning: Ooooo brutal! Ghost: Karma.

-- Ghost: Wait…Johnny’s into me? Like…he LIKES me?? Gaz: Oh Si…you poor, sad, dense mother fucker.

-- Ghost: At least nothing of importance was lost. Laswell: …Graves was kidnapped. Ghost: I know. I said what I said. Y/N: Nothing of value was lost but we did shed off some trash! Ghost: Precisely.

-- Ghost: These lights make me wanna pull my eyes out and eat them. Medic!Y/N: *turns lights off in favor of a lamp* …alright, so you’re autistic, good to know.

-- Ghost: Should I get my reading glasses? Y/N: Oh no no, this isn’t an eye test. It’s a GAY test. Now tell me, *holds up picture of Farah & Graves; Price being 1* Number one, or number two? Ghost: Number one?… Y/N: Interesting. *holds up Farah & Soap, Soap being 2* Okay now number one, or number two? Ghost: *gasp* Y/N: Number two, right? Ghost: Maybe I am gay?

-- Waitress: So, I’ve gotta ask, I’m really curious. 141: ? Waitress: Have any of you ever used like…the military language in bed? Soap: Naaaah. Y/N: No, I don’t- PFFFT, I- *wheeze* I’m sorry I’m imagining it- Gaz: *biting back laughs* Y/N: “You gonna come?” Affirmative. *laughs* Soap: *WHEEZE* Gaz: *cackling* Price: Oh lord- Gaz, snickering: Picking up speed. Y/N: COPY- *Laughter x100* The entire team: *giggling like hyenas* Ghost: Uh, that’s a no. I don’t think we’ve done that.

-- Price: *smiles at Soap & Gaz being stupid* Y/N: I like when you smile. Price: …huh? Y/N: Your smile, I like it. Makes your eyes crinkle up and your beard makes you look like a cuddly bear. You should smile more. Price, internally on the verge of tears: *fond sigh* Get back to drills, soldier. Y/N: Yes sir!

-- Ghost: *minding his fucking business* Y/N: You have pretty eyes. Ghost: *chokes on air* Pardon? Y/N: You have pretty eyes. Ghost: No I-…they’re just brown. Y/N: So? Your eyes don’t have to be blue or green to be pretty. They’re pretty because they’re expressive, and when the sun hits them they look like syrup. I like’em best when we’re all at a bar. They get brighter then. Ghost: Ghost: …stop talking, sergeant. Y/N: Copy that, L.T! <3

-- Gaz: *laughing at something on his phone* Y/N: You have a great laugh. Gaz: Hm? Oh…really? Y/N: Mhm. It’s cute, comes from your chest. I’ve never heard you laugh in anyway that’s not genuine. Really fills the room with joy. Gaz: Dude, you’re gonna make me all soft with words like that. Y/N: All according to plan!

-- Soap: *rambling about something* Y/N: *listening intently* Soap: Then-…ah, I been talkin’ at you this whole time, eh? Should probably quiet down. Y/N: No no, I like your voice! Soap: Eh? Y/N: It’s super energetic and loud, and when you tell a joke or talk about something you love, it’s like you can hear your smile. It’s really fun to listen to. I like when you talk! Soap: *inhale* You’re gonna make me cry- Y/N: I have tissues!

-- König: *fidgeting* Y/N: *takes his hands* You have beautiful hands. König: Wh- Huh?? No they are not. Y/N: They are too! König: Nien, they’re rough and calloused, they break a lot of things… Y/N: They also pet stray cats, make the best coffee on base, and create crotchet works of art. They also mend wounds pretty well. Yeah they fire guns but that doesn’t make them less beautiful. König: *he’s actually crying* …Danke. Y/N: Don’t mention it!

-- Rudy: *rolling his shoulder* Y/N: Anyone ever tell you that you have great shoulders? Rudy: Hm? Oh uh…no, I don’t believe so. Y/N: Well you do! Rudy: Ah, gracias. When I was younger I wanted them to be broader, sometimes now I wish they were more narrow. Can never really be happy with’em, you know? Y/N: Well I think you should be. They’re strong! *gently pats his shoulders* They hold a lot of weight, metaphorically and physically. And even when they’re weighed down, you shoulder it and keep moving. You’re real good at that! I like your shoulders. Rudy, prepared to die for them: …gracias. Y/N: No problem! Now c’mon, the guys are waitin’ for us!

-- Y/N: You have good collarbones. Alejandro: What was that? Y/N: Sorry, I know that’s real specific, but I think your collarbones are pretty. It’s like…the rest of you is bulky and strong, rugged. Then you have these delicate bones. I’m probably being too poetic but it’s like a subtle nod to your gentler side, just, built into your body. Alejandro: …you have a lovely way with words, camarada. Y/N: Thank you! I appreciate that!!

[cyripticchronicler]

i haven’t request before so i apologise if i’ve done anything wrong 😭

sirius finding out about james & regulus’ relationship so he asks out james’sibling!reader for ‘revenge’ but falls for reader hard.

it’s absolutely fine if you don’t do this, just thought i’d request and i love your fics 🤍🦇

Accidental Love

Pairing: Sirius Black x Fem!Potter!Reader

Summary: Sirius can't erase the image of Regulus and James together. And he knows that the only way to put out the flame of anger in his chest is through you.

A/N: This is my longest fic yet ahaha. It was a lot of fun and I hope you enjoy! I'm so sorry it took me so long to get to your requests, I've had so many things to write! To all the other people who have requested, I'll get to them as soon as I can. I love you all and you deserve great things xx (Yes that's a Pride and Prejudice (2005 version) quote at the end of the fic)

TW: Swearing, Sirius is kinda a dick, mention of Sirius' bad parents, kissing, not proofread (please tell me of any mistakes)

Masterlist

The red hot betrayal stings Sirius’ tongue and poisons each gulp of water he forces down his throat in an attempt to control his growing anger. His hands shake, fisted at his side, yet he can’t draw his eyes from the scene in front of him. 

His best friend and brother, laughing and holding hands like it was completely normal to see the two together. Sirius isn’t sure why the sight in front of him hurts so bad. Maybe it’s because it’s his brother, one he’s never had a good relationship with because of his parents always pushing them apart, laughing so easily and carelessly with his best friend. Or maybe it’s because it’s James, one of his best friends, the one he tells everything, keeping this relationship with his brother a secret. 

He probably looks insane, sitting alone in the corner of The Three Broomsticks, anger rolling off of him in waves. He’s not sure what to do. Does he go up there and confront them? Does he pretend like he saw nothing? Logistically, he knows it would be better to walk away, take a moment to gather his thoughts, but he just can’t get the image of them out of his mind, can’t get the taste of betrayal off of his tongue. 

So he forms a plan, one he doesn’t let himself second guess. And he knows it’s going to work well, knows it’s going to hit James right where it hit Sirius because it involves you.

✰✰✰

You’re none the wiser to the plans and strategies forming in Sirius’ head, leaning against the armrest in the Gryffindor common room as you chat adamantly about all the Transfiguration homework that has been set. 

Alice, smiling at how worked up you get over the class, listens eagerly to your complaints, butting in when it feels right. Lily on the other hand, taking up all the space on the sofa with her long legs, pokes at your arm in an attempt to shut you up, having heard you complain on the way to the grand hall this morning. 

“How about instead of complaining, you actually do the homework,” She teases, giggling as Alice hits her leg playfully. Your face scrunches in confusion, head tilting to the side ever so slightly. “I’ve already done the homework.”

Alice and Lily gawk at you. Huffing out a laugh, Alice grins teasingly. “Then what’s all this complaining for? You’ve been talking non-stop for half an hour about this bloody homework.” It’s your turn to smile, shifting so your feet are between Lily’s legs spread out on the couch, ignoring her annoyed yelp. “Just because I’ve finished doesn’t mean the amount wasn’t pure torture the whole time.”

You hear Lily’s smirk before you see it. “That sounds a little dirty. Who’s been torturing you, missy?” Your eyes widen, cheeks flushing even as you laugh. “Shush! My brother’s probably here somewhere, and I don’t think he’d like the thought of his little sister getting it on,” You grit through your teeth, scanning the crowded room to look for him. You sigh in relief when you see no sight of him.

“Oh please,” Alice pinches your cheeks. “No one would believe you’re getting it on. When a guy asks you out you just stare at them and wait until they take it back.” You swat her hands away and rub your red cheeks. “That is not true!” They just stare at you, eyebrows raised. 

Thankfully, you’re saved from having to defend yourself when someone pointedly clears their throat from behind you. Cringing at the thought of someone having heard your conversation, you turn around slowly, heart speeding up at the sight of none other than Sirius Black in front of you. 

You’ve stopped lying to yourself about the tiny, minuscule, crush you have on Sirius months ago. There’s no denying the speeding of your heart, or the way your cheeks flush when he so much as looks your way. But you’ve pushed those feelings away, deep down inside you to gather dust and hopefully one day, whither away.

You muster up your best smile and ignore the heat in your cheeks. “Hey, Sirius. I’m not sure where James is but I think Remus is in the library.” He smiles his usual, arrogant smile but it wobbles like it’s hard to hold. 

“I’m not here to see them. I’m here to see you.” Eyes widening a fraction, you attempt to get your thoughts in place, though it’s hard with the consistent poking of Lily’s finger on your arm. “Okay.” You take Sirius’ gesture to an emptier part of the room as a sign, awkwardly shuffling out of between Lily’s feet and trying not to trip. 

“What did you need to talk to me about?” Your hands fiddle nervously behind your back and you shift on your feet. Sirius reveals his picture-perfect smile, eyes crinkling in the corners. Smoothly, as if it were the most normal thing in the world, he places a cold hand on your shoulder, stopping your nervous movements. 

“I was wondering if you wanted to go out with me sometime? Just the two of us?” Time seems to stop, your breath getting caught in your throat. Through your shocked haze, the overthinking spiral begins just like it does when anyone asks you out. Sirius could be asking you out as a joke. Maybe James is pranking you. It’s most likely a dream, Sirius has shown no interest in you before. 

“You okay?” His amused voice snaps you from your over-thinking haze, eyes blinking rapidly at the sudden dryness. Back to the corner of the room, you’re able to spot Alice and Lily eyeing you curiously from their spot on the couch a few feet away. Alice notices your stare and provides an encouraging thumbs up, while Lily performs some crude motions with her fingers.

Frowning, you drag your eyes back to Sirius’ patient eyes. “Um,” Your tongue feels heavy inside your mouth. “Okay?” He lights up, eyes twinkling while an eager grin spreads across his face, showcasing his dimples. You try not to awe out loud. 

“Great! Does tomorrow in hogsmeade sound good? We’ll meet in the common room and walk down together.” You can’t do anything but manage a small smile and nod, overwhelmed with the amount of emotions hitting you. 

Sirius shoots you another smile, and perhaps if you paid more attention you would have noticed the guilt painted on his face, or the smell of revenge as he walked away.

✰✰✰

In the cool common room, morning light peeks through the framed windows and sheds a musky light throughout the empty space. You stand awkwardly in the middle, kicking the dusty carpet nervously with your shoe-clad feet. 

Your heart is beating wildly in your chest and you scratch at the inside of your wrist, a nervous habit you picked up years ago. You’ve been standing for at least five minutes now, no sign of Sirius. Your mind is racing and you begin to wonder if he’s even coming or not, but thankfully for you and your heart, the sound of footsteps break out behind you.

“Hey!” You whip around, a small smile on your face that reflects the glee in your bones. “Hi,” You whisper, letting him pull you in for a small hug, a mere touch of your shoulders before he’s walking slowly beside you. 

“I was thinking we could go shopping then maybe get a butterbeer?” The small grin that paints his face is noticeable through his voice. “I’d love that. Um-” You scratch your eyebrow in an attempt to clear your thoughts. “How are you?”

His hand moves to your back, guiding you down the windy path that leads to Hogsmeade, layered with early morning frost. Your hands, clad in gloves to beat the cold, fidget nervously with the straps of your bag. “I’m well. Been busy with school. Remus’ birthday is coming up so we’ve been trying to plan something for him. How about you?”

“I’m okay. I’ve been swamped with school work, and barely had enough time to paint.” 

“You paint?” He asks curiously. You nod. “Yeah, mostly realism but sometimes abstract.”

“I’d love to see your work sometime, I’m sure it's beautiful.” You blush for what seems like the millionth time today. “Maybe one day.” You don’t share your art much, only to close friends like Lily and Alice, but only the really good ones. Yet, you can see yourself sharing your artwork with Sirius. 

You continue to chat about your classes, chatting adamantly with each other. And it feels good. He seems to care, laughs and makes jokes at the right times, stares at you with increasing interest. 

But there’s a nagging feeling in your gut, something that won’t go away no matter how much candy from Honeydukes you eat. “You alright?” Sirius asks when you’re quieter than usual, staring off into space while trying to decipher the odd feeling. 

Sirius watches as a frown tarnishes your usually happy face, the guilt of what he’s doing, how he’s using you, nagging at him. Yet he can’t seem to stop, whenever he thinks of admitting what he’s doing the image of James and Regulus together stares back at him and makes it hard for him to open his mouth. 

“Sorry, I’m alright, Sirius. Just thinking.” His shoulder bumps yours, pulling you along to The Three Broomsticks. “About?” He grins, a certain spark in his eyes. You smile back. “Just things.” He pulls you to a stop right outside the entrance, moving down your sweater-covered arms until his hands are in yours. 

“You’re really pretty.” It’s true, but it doesn’t stop the pang of guilt, followed quickly by an image of James and Regulus hugging. You melt, flushing under his stare, that's swarming with so much admiration, you find it impossible to believe.

“Thank you. So are you.” Entering The Three Broomsticks, warmth and the smell of butterbeer greeting you. You're too absorbed in finding an empty table to notice the pink flush that covers the apple of his cheeks. 

Throughout Sirius’ lifetime, he’s never gotten many compliments. After leaving his family and moving in with James, Euphemia had given Sirius many motherly compliments. But coming from a beautiful girl who he’s treating unfairly, the compliment hits hard. 

But it still doesn't stop him from planning, scheming. How can he show James how it hurts? How does he make sure he feels the same pain and betrayal Sirius felt when seeing Regulus and him together?

Watching you, eyes lit up by the flickering candles that provide a romantic, peaceful aroma, he knows that it’s going to hurt you. Painfully hard. 

✰✰✰

“How are you doing, Padfoot? Moony and I came up with another prank to get back at Malfoy. Are you up for it?” James speaks so casually, resting against the pillows on his bed while he reads a book about quidditch, it’s hard to think he’s keeping a secret. If Sirius had not seen it with his own eyes, he wouldn't have thought anything was out of the ordinary. 

“No.” He responds gruffly, shrugging on a leather jacket and pulling rings on his fingers. “You okay, Pads?” Remus asks and he finally looks up, noting the frown that pulls at both of their faces. “I’m fine.” His voice is noticeably softer when pointed at Remus.

“Where are you going?” James asks with a small, hesitant smile and Sirius can’t help but feel guilt at the anger he’s feeling towards an oblivious James. But he can’t bring himself to act nicer, can’t force a sweeter tone in his voice. “Date.”

“With who?” Your sister. “Someone.” Remus opens his mouth but he’s quick to cut him off. “Bye.”

Your first date with Sirius was a week ago and Sirius knew straight away what he wanted to do for the second date. Even though he’s doing it to get back at James, he can’t help but feel a pang of excitement at the notion of going on a second date with you.

Your smiling face greets him outside the common room, leaning against the wall across from the Fat Lady. “Hey, love.” You blush adorably at the nickname and Sirius eyes your nails as they scratch at your wrist. He grabs your hand before you can hurt yourself more.

You let him pull you down the moving stairs, your little giggles echoing off the stone walls. “Where are we going?” You ask, tightening your hold on his hand. “Painting.” Your eyes widen and you splutter in shock. 

“What?” Sirius can’t help but grin at the obvious excitement in your eyes. “I told you I wanted to see your artwork. I bought the supplies yesterday, figured we could have a picnic.” Your awe at this new side of Sirius, the side that plans special dates and puts effort into it. It was a nice day today and Sirius wanted to take advantage of the sunny weather before the snow that’s set to fall next week prevents them from going outside.

Sirius had shown no interest in you before. He’d been kind, sure, but you’d never had a proper, real conversation until he asked you out. Maybe that's why there’s still an odd feeling in your gut, maybe it’s because you know it’s weird he asked you out on a random day, without showing any interest in you before that. But for now, you blame it on overthinking and push those feelings away.

You chat aimlessly on the way to the Black Lake, fiddling with your skirt so you don’t do something stupid like grab his hand. After the end of your last date, you’ve both agreed to keep this dating thing a secret. 

The gasp you let out at the sight of the laid picnic has Sirius grinning, a proud sort of glee that rolls down his spine. He takes a seat next to you on the pink checkered blanket, sitting around the pile of food he prays you like. 

Passing you an empty canvas and a basket of paints, he watches as you sit and stare for a moment, contemplating. He doesn’t like the way his heart speeds up at the unmistakable beauty that is your face. So he ignores it. 

“What are you painting?” You grab the colors you need, mixing them on a fresh pallet. The ideas that come to you are clear as day, images of green, healthy trees next to a shimmering, blue lake where people are swimming in the early morning sun. You begin to paint before you forget. 

“Just a landscape. You?” You take a quick peek at his canvas, seeing he’s already added streaks of red and orange. “I have no idea. I don’t think I’ve ever painted before?”

“Ever?” You ask, the shock clear in your voice. You see him grin at you from the corner of your eye. “Never had the opportunity. No one in my family paints and James and Remus don’t.”

“Remus does actually, I ran into him once at this muggle painting class.” Sirius laughs. “Of course he’s painted before. He’s a man of many talents.”

You grin, brushing stray hair out of your eyes. Trying not to shiver at the cold wind, you begin to regret your decision of wearing a skirt and thin, long sleeve top. “He had the best art in the whole class, James couldn’t stop laughing at me when I came back with Remus behind me holding an award for best art.”

Sirius laughs, head throwing back at the thought of Remus’ smug face and your defeated one. “I guess you being siblings with James means you’re friends with all of his friends.” Your smile turns sad, voice quiet. “Yeah.”

Sirius frowns, momentarily stopping to gently nudge your shoulder. “What’s up?” You sigh, biting your lip. “It’s just…All of my friends- most of them, are really only friends with me because of James. Being friends with me would give them more opportunities to get with James, right?” You attempt a laugh though it’s not funny.

“I’m sorry.” His voice is genuine and when you look at him he’s already looking at you, eyes sparkling. You shake your head and look back down at your work. “Don’t be sorry, Sirius. You did nothing. And I have Lily and Alice, I don’t need anyone else.”

The guilt almost eats him alive. He feels physically sick at how you're going to react. At the fact he's doing something that’s going to hurt you badly. Your kind, beautiful soul doesn’t deserve this. 

He opens his mouth, ready to confess and face the backlash of you hating him, something he doesn’t know if he can handle but deserves. You beat him to it. “Don’t tell James, please. I don’t need him feeling guilty, it’s not his fault.” And now he can’t tell you. You’ve poured your heart out, confessed something you haven’t even told James. Maybe one day, when you grow to hate him and leave like they all will, will he tell you.

You continue to paint until the sun starts setting and casts a warm glow on the two of you. With your hair, now tied up in a messy bun and Sirius’ leather jacket around your shoulders, you look perfect in his head. He feels happy and free and he knows he’s looking at you weirdly, too soft for his usual harsh features but he can’t stop. 

So he looks away and shows you his painting of a terrible sunset where two people sit on a grassy field and watch as the sun makes room for the power of the moon. You show yours next, a painting worth the spot next to the Mona Lisa and Sirius makes sure to fawn over it, making sure you know your own worth. Afterwards, you eat and watch the sunset just like the couple in his painting. When you invite him sledding next week, he can’t bring himself to say no. Or to tell you the truth because that would mean losing you, and that’s something he just can’t handle. 

✰✰✰

“You ready, sweetheart?” Your laughter is music to his ears, a melody he’s not sure he could ever go without. It’s scary, how quickly you’ve grown on him, but he can’t bring himself to pull back. 

“I was born ready.” You’re holding a wooden sleigh beneath your armpit, fingers tapping along to a beat in your head as you trudge through the thick snow that fell overnight, the sunny weather from your last date nowhere to be found. 

You stop at the tip of a snowy hill, white frosting reflecting the sun in your eyes that you attempt to shield away with your gloved hands. “Let’s do this.” You grin teasingly at Sirius, holding up your sleigh. He copies you, hitting yours gently with your own. 

Placing the sleigh on the ground, he crouches down beside it with a furrowed brow. “How do we do this?” Your eyebrows raise in surprise. “You’ve never done this before?” He sheepishly smiles, scratching the back of his neck. “My family’s not one for things like sledding.” 

You know about his family history of course, James has been talking to your Mom and Dad a lot more recently, discussing how we could get Sirius to stay with us. You hope one day he can do all the things he wasn’t allowed to do. Him and Regulus deserve better. 

You know Sirius wouldn’t appreciate the pitying look on your face so you mask it with excitement and quickly teach him how to sit in the sleigh. “Race you.” You challenge once he’s ready before speeding down the steep hill, Sirius not too far behind you. Laughter fills the air, your hair whipping behind you. 

Once you reach the end with an abrupt stop, you roll onto the cool snow, making snow angels. Sirius’ face comes into view, blocking the sun from your squinting eyes and you grin, tongue between your teeth as you attempt to withhold your loud giggles. 

“I beat you!” And then he’s jumping down beside you, rolling over top of you to tickle your warming body. He’s greedy, wanting more of your laughter that seems to be his lifeline. “That was luck!” He insists, continuously tickling you until you tap out. 

Then you’re running up the hill again, sleigh behind you while Sirius follows. He’s barely in his sleigh before you’re speeding down the hill again, a whir of colors in the white cloudy snow. He attempts to catch up, a running head start proves useful when he’s speeding past you with an excited cheer. 

The abrupt stop has him falling into the snow that he pays no attention to, whipping around to try and decipher where you went, having lost you halfway down the hill. “Hello?” He yells into the open, empty air. He can’t see you anywhere, just pure white snow. 

Sirius frowns, standing up to look around. “Hello?” His heart is racing now, no sight of you anywhere. “Where are you?” Stomping through the snow, he runs up the hill to see if you’re there. You’re not. 

“Boo!”

Sirius jumps in fright, letting out a high pitched scream that has you doubling over in laughter. “You-You-” You mock his face, quiet laughs escaping your open mouth. Stomach hurting from how much you’ve laughed, you collapse to the floor again, this time bringing Sirius with you. He falls beside you, one hand holding his head up while he watches you die of laughter, smile on his chapped lips. 

Slowly, your laughter dies down, silence heavy in the air. You open your eyes to find him staring back at you and you sigh at the beauty of his face. The slope of his nail, sharp cut of his jaw and accentuated cheekbones. 

He’s like a force that can’t be defeated, leaning up on your elbows, nose grazing his. He smiles, hot breath hitting your plump lips. “Can I kiss you?” You’re not sure whether the words uttered were your own or his, but both of you eagerly lean into each other, lips grazing before he’s pressing them against yours. 

It’s heart stopping, a thrill racing down your spine and you press yourself harder against him, letting him grip your waist with his large hands. Sirius can’t think, can’t feel anything but your lips on his, warm and soft and perfect.

And he knows that he can’t ever tell you. He can’t tell you of his cruel, unforgivable actions because he knows now that you were the one he always needed. He won’t tell you anything.

✰✰✰

“Did you just smile at my sister?” James’ voice snaps Sirius out of his trance where he was thinking and looking at you. Whipping his head to face James, whose face is set in curiosity, Sirius merely nods. “We’ve become…Friends.”

He can’t help himself and sneaks another look at you where you sit not too far away, hands moving wildly in front of you whilst talking to Alice and Lily. He grins again. 

“Oh,” A knowing glint enters James’ eyes. Sirius ignores it. “I’m glad you’ve become…Friends.” James attempts to hide his smirk by drinking his orange juice. 

Sirius is too absorbed in you and the fact you’re walking near him to notice or care. He thinks he’s about to have a heart attack when you stop beside him, lips tingling in memory of the kiss from just yesterday. 

He feels his heart deflate when you direct your attention to James and not him. “You said you wanted to talk to me?” His eyes widen and he nods, shooting Sirius a quick, guilty glance before standing up from his seat. “Yeah, I want your advice on something. Can we walk?”

Your eyebrows furrow, curiosity reflecting in your eyes. You nod and follow him out of the great hall whilst shooting Remus and Sirius a parting smile. 

“I’m glad to hear you and Sirius are friends.” Hands in his uniform pockets, James is a ball of nervous energy. You blush at his words and the only response you can come up with is a quiet “yeah.”

You round the corner that leads to the courtyard. “I was thinking that since you and Sirius are now friends,” He exaggerates the word ‘friend,’ “I could get your advice on how you think he’d feel if he found out me and Regulus are dating.” The whispered last words have you stopping in your tracks, head whipping up to stare at James with wide eyes. 

“You’re gay?” James panics, whipping his head around and aggressively pushing you into an empty classroom. “Merlin, you don’t have to shout it.”

“James,” You can’t hold back your smile, “I’m so happy for you.” He deflates, eyes that once bounced around the room nervously now glint with unshed tears and he pulls you in for a tight hug. 

You hug him back tighter, squeezing in a way you hope annoys him. You mutter against his shoulder, “To answer your question, I think Sirius would be happy for you both. But he’s protective over Regulus, it might take time for him to get used to the idea.”

He pulls away, shaking your shoulder while he subtly wipes away a stray tear. “Okay, thanks, I keep panicking at the thought of Sirius hating me for dating his brother. He’s been ignoring me recently and I keep thinking it’s because he already knows.”

Your eyes widen, having a slight suspicion on why Sirius was ignoring James. “I’m sure it has nothing to do with you. Now we should go before we’re late for first period.” He shakes you aggressively, holding you by the shoulders in a brotherly way to annoy you. 

“Yes, go to class, little shit. I’m happy for you and Sirius, you know.” Wild heat blazes across your cheeks, heart growing louder in your ears. “I-I don’t-”

He’s out of the room before you can finish your sentence.

✰✰✰

“Let’s go before all the tables are full!” You’re pulling Sirius along, having to take large lunge-like steps to reach The Three Broomsticks quickly. Light snow, melting by each step, provides a slippery path to the entrance. 

Sirius has his hands on your hips, ensuring you don’t fall. He reaches past you to open the door, quickly guiding you in to ensure the heat does not escape. The tilt of his lips is felt against the shell of your ear, keeping you close against him. 

You giggle quietly, a flush warming your whole body. Sirius feels the exact same flush. He’s never felt so warm and happy. It’s all because of you. 

His body bumps into you when you abruptly stop in the middle of the building. Nudging his nose with your cheek - how easily he began to crave your touch a shock to even him - he follows your gaze, letting out a breath at the view he’s unwillingly seen a second time. 

James and Regulus. Noses touching. Hands touching. Staring only at each other. He wonders if that’s what you both look like, infatuated with each other, greedy with touches and absolutely disgusting to look at. 

“Do you-” Your voice, sweet as honey, snaps him out of his thoughts. “-want to sit with them?” Your voice is hesitant, nervous for his reaction. But a simple squeeze of his hand has him nodding and shuffling to the table where James and Regulus have finally noticed you both. 

He notices the way you separate from him so that you’re no longer touching. But, instead of focusing on that, he focuses on shooting his brother a strained, awkward smile. He’s never had the best relationship with his brother, something Sirius regrets deeply. 

The strain their parents caused with favoring one and abusing the other, had caused a rocky relationship that had been on the mend ever since Sirius had become friends with James and Remus. 

“Do you want to sit?” The sharp, blunt voice of his brother has him sitting and pulling you with him. Years of living together has given Sirius the talent of noticing his brother's nervous tics. The tick of his jaw and scrunch of his nose gave him away. 

It seems Sirius wasn’t the only one who noticed his nervousness because James, who still chats with you, places his hand on top of Regulus’. “How are you?” Sirius attempts, tongue heavy in his mouth. 

“Good.” Came his blunt reply. A tap of his hand from James has his jaw twitching. “How are you?” 

“Good.”

Silence

You, ever kind and understanding, would not settle for the awkward and kept the conversation going, conversing with James and Regulus, even attempting to include Sirius, who tried to join in for you. And Regulus. 

He watches the way James notes every expression on Regulus’ face, can read any sign of nervousness, stress, happiness, and he realizes he’s now not the only one who can read his brother. The skill that took Sirius years to master, James had learned in a much shorter amount of time. 

He frowns. “How long have you two been together?” Regulus answers, narrowing his eyes, threatening. “Three months.” James places a comforting hand on his shoulder and Regulus drops the glare. “What about you two?” He asks a lot more gently than Sirius asked. 

You, who watched the situation with an amused brow, flushed embarrassingly quickly. “Oh- we’re not-”

“We’ve been on three dates- four if you count this one. We’re still trying to figure it out.” Sirius replies smoothly. He’s surprised to find no hint of anger or betrayal on James’ face. Like he planned. But, he’s not disappointed at that fact. If anything, he’s relieved. Relieved James isn’t angry about this relationship because Sirius couldn't stay away from you if he tried. 

“I’m happy for you two.” You smile, kicking your brother gratefully under the table. A rare spark of amusement shines in Regulus’ eyes, a void of black. “Knowing you Sirius, I'm surprised you’re not pissed.” He leans forward on his elbows, tilting his head in a playful challenge. “You’re not secretly plotting to get back at us, are you?”

You laugh, turning to Sirius and expecting him to laugh too but he only looks down at his hands that grip his butterbeer, a flash of guilt that’s gone before it’s there. Your smile is tight. Wrapping your arm around Sirius’ arm, you go back to filling the silence. 

“Does Remus know?” James nods, licking the butterbeer off his lips. “Yeah, I needed advice on how to tell you,” He looks at Sirius. “I told him a month ago. That fucker told me he already knew.” 

You laugh, happy your brother is surrounded by such good people. Looking down in your hands, you note your drink is empty and sigh. “Does anyone want another drink?” The glasses in front of James and Sirius are empty while Regulus still nurses his drink. They both nod.

Sirius goes to stand up but you force him to sit with a hand on his shoulder. “Sit. I’ll go get the drinks while you three talk.” You widen your eyes, hoping Sirius gets the hint. Without leaving room for argument, you hurry to the bar to order more drinks, a giddy sort of excitement bubbling your blood. 

“Three butterbeers, please.” You grin, tapping your hands on the bench while you wait. “You and Sirius are cute.” You jump at a new voice, smiling at Marlene who takes the empty spot next to you while she waits for her drinks. 

“Thank you,” You whisper, flushed. She winks playfully at you. “So are Regulus and James. It’s annoying that they're gay, though. They’re so hot.” You laugh awkwardly, not knowing how to respond to someone talking about your brother like that. 

Fresh drinks in front of you, you’re about to head back to the table when Marlene says something that makes you pause. “I’m glad Sirius has finally gotten around to the idea of them together.” You tilt your head in confusion. “Finally? He just learnt of their relationship.”

It’s her turn to look confused. “No? I saw Sirius here like a month ago? He was staring all angry looking at them. I’m surprised steam wasn’t coming out of his ears. He just stood there for a good five minutes before he left, never got a table or anything.”

Your heart beats like crazy, a sinking suspicion forming in your mind. “What day was this?” Marlene smiles, unaware of the impending pain that she forces on your heart. “September 5th?”

The day Sirius asked you out. 

You’re not secretly plotting to get back at us, are you?

He was. 

Not wanting to go back to the table and face the truth just yet, you stand by the bar, listening to Marlene talk and pretending to listen. 

Sirius watches you, unable to keep his eyes off for more than a second. He forces himself to look away when he feels James staring at him though. “Yes?” 

“Don’t hurt her. She may act tough, but she’s sensitive.” James, face that’s usually all smiley and happy, is now set in a threatening glare, jaw clenched and Sirius knows he’s being serious. 

“I never want to hurt her.” It’s true. If the racing of his heart, the weird feeling in his bones, and the dizziness that fogs his mind whenever he thinks of you is any indication, he’s falling in love with you. But just because he wants to doesn’t mean he can go back in time and change his intentions for why he asked you out in the first place. He regrets it. The anger and betrayal that took over him was merely a passing emotion, replaced with happiness for both his brother and James. 

But just because his feelings about their relationship changed, doesn’t mean you would understand why he did it. 

✰✰✰

You’d been awfully quiet the rest of the night. And it’s hitting Sirus the wrong way. He knows something’s wrong but he doesn’t know what, nor does he know how to fix it. 

The light that you emitted was nowhere to be found, and you’ve kept yourself distant, ignoring all his attempts to touch you. 

“Are you okay?” He whispers in your ear, touching your hip gently. He frowns, heart panging when you flinch away from him. “I need to talk to you,” Your voice is a whisper, unable to be heard in the crowded common room if Sirius wasn’t so attentive to your every move. 

He nods, too aggressively to be considered normal. He watches you scratch your wrist and he lets you, not wanting to be rejected again. Or worse; you flinch back.

He follows you like a lost puppy, clambering up the stairs behind you until you’re in the empty hallway. You lean against the wall and he leans against the other one to give you space, wanting nothing more than to reach for your hand. 

“I-” You look down at your shoes, hiding your eyes from his wanting gaze. “I was talking to Marlene. She told me that you saw James and Regulus together like a month ago. And that you looked really angry.” It feels like a rock was stuck in his throat, he couldn’t swallow, couldn’t breathe. He knows where it’s going and he knows he can’t defend himself because it was all. His. Fault. 

“Then Regulus made a joke, you know the one about you plotting to get revenge. I mean,” You ran your hand through your hands nervously, feeling like there was a pack of bugs in your heart that were fighting to get out “you didn’t even laugh at the joke. It wasn’t that funny but you looked so…Guilty-”

He can’t look you in the eyes when he confesses. “I first asked you out to get back at James.” He swore he could hear your heart break. He could feel his own heart shatter when you started walking away, and he desperately ran in front of you to try and get you to stop. “I have to admit, at first it was merely a ploy to make James understand what I felt. Because I was so angry and I felt so betrayed. I didn’t mean to fall for you, but you’re so brilliant. You’re beautiful and smart, and I was selfish. I’m so sorry, baby.” 

He couldn't keep the agony out of his voice if he tried. His chest was rising and falling in hard breaths and he felt physically nauseous. You’re everything to him and you’re going to leave him. 

“Would you-” Your voice cracks and you clear your throat. “Would you have told me at all? That you used me?” His silence was enough of an answer. 

Your whole body shakes and your bottom lip wobbles. Salty tears roll down your cheeks and you cover your mouth, squeezing your eyes shut and shaking your head. No. He never even wanted you. He took advantage of your stupid crush and used you. A loud sob racks through your body and you turn away, unable to look at the man you had begun to fall in love with. 

“Please-” You managed to speak through gasped sobs. “Please, I can’t look at you right now.”

“I'm sorry-”

“Sirius.”

He walks off, taking your heart with it. The loss of his own heaving breaths told you he was gone and allowed you to finally collapse, falling back against the wall.

✰✰✰

You hadn’t left the girls dormitory in three days. Your heart weighs heavily in your chest and it holds you down, stopping you from going anywhere but your bed and the bathroom. Besides small bites of the food one of the girls had dropped off, you haven’t eaten much either. 

You feel pathetic. You wouldn’t be this worked up over any guy but it was Sirius, a man you’ve been crushing on for what feels like forever. And he used you. After you opened up, told him how you’ve been used multiple times because of James and he did the same thing. 

Three days in near total confinement, you’ve managed to analyze every moment with him. Every kiss, every touch, every look. Was any of it real? You’ve rubbed your cheeks raw from how much you’ve cried.

It hurts so bad and it seems to never end. It feels as though there's a big, gaping hole where your heart should be. 

“Hey, sweetie.” You lift your head from your tear-stained pillow, turning to face the door. Lily has just come back from classes, pretty red hair tied in a bun at the top of her head. She smiles one of her sweet, pitying smiles that only make you feel more pathetic. 

“Hi,” You mutter. She comes closer, stroking your hair and ignoring the knots. “James has come to see you.” 

You sit up so fast you begin to feel dizzy. “Fuck,” You whisper, pressing the palm of your hand against your forehead. “You think you could hold him off?” You already know the answer before she speaks. “I’m sorry. He’s been trying to see you ever since you never showed up for dinner three days ago. ‘Don’t think he’s going to take no for an answer anymore.”

“Okay,” You sigh, sitting up in bed and scrubbing your face. She kisses you on the forehead gently before going to get James who barges into your room almost immediately. “Are you okay?”

You scoff, giving him a smile while he practically forces you into a hug. “I’m fine.” Your voice is muffled by the fabric of his Quidditch shirt. With a disgusted sniff, you push him away from you. “Ew get away you stink.” 

He doesn’t listen and instead forces you against his shirt and you gag, hitting at his arms while he practically suffocates you. “I thought you were trying to comfort me, you piece of shit.” He finally lets you go and you gasp dramatically for fresh air. “I am comforting you. See, there's a small smile on your ugly face.”

“Fuck off,” You mutter, only half meaning it. His face turns serious. “Now, seriously, are you okay?”

You look down at your hands, nodding slowly. “Yeah. Did, uh, Sirius tell you what happened?” He frowns. “He did, had a fucking go at him afterwards.”

“James.” You scold. 

“But then,” He continued, “We talked. And he told me what happened, why he did it. Sure, it was a dick move but he seems really sad at the idea. He was on the verge of a panic attack, Remus had to calm him down. You don’t have to forgive him, but maybe it would help if you two spoke.”

“James,” You sigh, pulling at your hair as the pang of a headache pulses in the front of your brain. “He hurt me. He used me, I’m not sure if I’m ready to talk to him.” Gently, his hands move up to stroke your hair. “Okay, that’s okay. You don’t need to forgive him but I got a letter from Mom and she’s letting Regulus and Sirius stay with us for as long as they need.”

“Okay,” You blink, rubbing your eyes and laying back against the bed. “Can we talk about something else, I’m sick of crying.” He mockingly pouts though you know he really is worried about you. 

And then he’s pulling you in for another hug despite your physical protests. 

✰✰✰

It takes another five days to muster the courage to talk to Sirius. He’s sitting in the common room, staring into the fireplace that blazes with fire, eyes vacant. Remus and James are huddled together, laughing at some gadget they’re playing with. 

You stand against the wall awkwardly, shifting on your feet awkwardly in hope Sirius would snap out of his daydreaming to notice you. Unfortunately, it’s Remus who notices you. And the smiled call of your name is what snaps Sirius out of his trance, bloodshot eyes snapping to yours almost instantly. 

The heartbreak in his eyes is a mirror of your own. You attempt a smile but it wobbles almost instantly. “Can I talk to you?” You’re not even sure you said it out loud but Sirius nods anyway, getting up from his spot on the couch and walking towards you, slowly as if you were ready to run at any moment. 

You feel like you could run at any moment.

With shaking hands, you gently grip his wrist. He lets out a sigh at the small touch of contact, eyes fluttering shut. Gently, you lead him outside of the common room and down the marble steps. 

It’s silent as you keep walking, down, down, down, until you’re at the Black Lake. Not once do you let go of your grip around his wrist. Not once does he comment on it, lest you remove your hand that provides the air he lives on. 

For the first time in a week he feels like he can finally breathe again. He’s scared of what you want to say, and he hates for this to be the last time he can touch you again. Impending dread twists his stomach but he selfishly allows himself to hope. 

“I want you to explain why you did it,” You start, stopping under a snow covered tree. Unlike Sirius, you’re dressed for the cold weather, wearing multiple layers of warm clothing and fluffy gloves. Sirius, on the other hand, is freezing his ass off, with only one layer of clothing and no gloves. But he doesn’t mind as long as it means more time with you. 

He’s been given the opportunity to explain himself and he’s not going to fuck this up. Shaking his head, he starts from the start. “When I first saw James and Regulus together I felt so angry. Regulus and I never had a good relationship, I like to blame it on my parents for pitting us against each other but I know it’s also my fault. I should have tried harder to have a relationship with him.”

It’s hard to stare with you looking at him like that but he’s trying his best. 

“I guess I got…Jealous? I’ve always wanted a good relationship with him- I mean he’s my brother, you know?” he lets out a dry laugh, void of any humor. “And then James didn’t tell me anything, I don’t expect him to but it hurt. I’ve been talking to someone Euphemia suggested and I think I was scared that he was going to leave. Regulus has always been my parents' favorite, and I got scared that James would see how much better he was and would leave me.”

 “Either way, I should have never involved you. And used you like that. You never deserved that and I’m so sorry.”

You’re quiet, staring at the frozen lake. Slowly, you wipe your mouth with your hands, turning to look at him. You manage a small smile before you’re walking towards him hesitantly, taking his hands that look ready to turn blue at any moment into yours. 

“Your hands are cold.” You place a gentle kiss on his knuckles and Sirius would have fallen to his knees in front of you if it wouldn’t have lost contact with your body, warm and inviting. Your lips tickle his fingers as you continue to speak. “A part of me is still a little angry. But I can’t stay away from you. Merlin, one week away from you and all I could think about were your kisses, and how kind you are.”

“So you’ll take me back?”

“Of course, my love.”

Then you’re kissing him, warming his cold lips and melting him from the inside out. You’re gentle, cradling his hands between yours and being so so loving. He feels like he could cry. He’s never felt this loved before, not by his parents, not by his friends, heck, not by his brother. 

“I love you,” It's the first time he’s ever whispered those words, but it feels right. Everything about you and him feels right. 

“I love you too.”

[totalswag]

Can you write that Drew x actress!reader are at home with their first baby boy while relaxing and suddenly, a huge surprise that they didn't expect so soon, especially Drew, as a Christmas present

Inspired by this 😊: https://www.instagram.com/reel/C03sQNHIjf3/?igsh=MWF0cno2M2tubjZ3Ng==

first words — DREW STARKEY

authors note this is such a cute request! i’ve seen these videos and they are so freaking adorable. thank you for the request <3

summary drew and you have been trying for your son to say his first words. one day he blurts out his first word making your christmas better

warnings wholesome content

Christmas is right around the corner.

First Christmas with your seven month old son, Noah. First Christmas as a family of three.

Drew and you finally have a month off from filming to be with family. The both of you have had busy schedules these past few months with filming and to get this break is wonderful.

Noah, your eight-month-old, will shortly say his first word. There have been times when he almost uttered something but ended up babbling baby gibberish.

mama or dada

One of the two words Drew and you are aiming for.

Yes, you and Drew have been teaching Noah simple words that he can readily speak. You two are constantly talking to him and reading to him in the hopes that he would say one of the words.

Every parent wants their child’s first words to be mama or dada.

The three of you were in the living room on the couch with the tv playing a Christmas movie. The Christmas tree was a couple feet away from the tv, making the moment feel more magical.

Noah was lying on his stomach on Drew’s chest— arms folding in front of him, holding himself up to look at Drew who was talking to him and making faces.

The father and son duo with these two is the most beautiful thing ever to witness. Their bond continues to grow by the second. Now Drew and you are back on filming for Outer Banks, it’s hard being away from Noah.

"Oh really and what else?" Drew inquired, and Noah responded dramatically in his baby language.

Noah stares between you two, his eyes wide and his mouth slightly open, before becoming even louder.

In the mix of Noah talking in his baby gibberish, he says the word dada, catching Drew and you off guard immediately.

Your hand slaps over your mouth with shock. Tears form in your eyes. As a parent hearing your child’s first words is one of the greatest moments.

You immediately take your phone out to record this unforgettable moment.

Drew looks at you, shocked, emotional, and a smile beginning to grow on his face.

“Can you repeat that again?” Drew whispers to the eight month old, hoping he repeats the word you two just heard.

The sounds of your little sniffles can be heard from behind your phone.

Noah turns his head to the side, blinking a few times, trying to figure out what his father told him then opens his mouth to speak.

Noah moves his upper body around “dada dada” he blurts out, putting his small hands into a fist, punching Drew’s chest.

“Ahaha yes!” Drew cheer, wrapping both arms around Noah as he slides to the left landing on a soft pillow.

Noah let out a couple giggles, leaning his head on Drew’s chin as they swayed side to side. Drew gave him kisses all over his face as he shed a few tears.

Drew had the most biggest smile on his face. Hearing the words dada come out of his first borns mouth really does something because he’s always going to remember Noah’s first words.

“This is one of the best Christmas present I’ve ever received and Christmas is only in two weeks” Drew blurts out, whipping away the tears.

my taglist

if you would like to be in my taglist and be notified whenever i post my fics leave a comment.

@runningfrom2am @winterrrnight2 @brooklynscherry-z @kaydsr3venge @johannelis2302nely

[strongheartneteyam]

Realize where you belong.

Pairing: neteyam sully x female!dreamwalker!reader/female!human!reader

Chapter 4

CW: jealous neteyam, angst, restless neteyam, obsessive and toxic behavior, mentions of violence, neteyam's current mental health is not the best out there (let's put it that way), the word "bloody" being mentioned in someone's thoughts, TRIGGER WARNING for dubious consent and slight NON CON, angry thoughts, melancholic reader, hints of depression on reader, anxious reader, mentions of breeding kink, reader thinking a lot about neteyam, reader finds out she's crushing on neteyam, reader is afraid of neteyam + attracted to him, neteyam stepping over reader's boundaries, creepy yandere vibes, slight nudity, sexual tension, neteyam almost trying to have sex with reader (if you squint)

Not proofread… as always 😂 I'm so sorry PLS don't give up on me, my babies! My readers are my lil rays of sunshine! No false praising here, I'm way too much of an honest, and sometimes blunt bih to do that! Ahaha you guys have changed my life. Having you guys reading my stories, appreciating my art… I'm still speechless. I love y'all until the end! 🥲🥺🫀💕 when I'm sad, you guys cheer me up with your comments, reblogs, asks, likes… I'm forever thankful ✨ I'm sending A BIG KITH to everyone that commented on the other chapters! I didn't have enough time and mental/physical health to answer everyone bc I've been going through some tough things in my personal life lately. Like, REAL tough. But I always do my best to try and show my gratitude to all of you <3 hope you enjoy this chapter. Leave comments below if u wanna I LOOOOVE READING YOUR COMMENTS 🥰💕💕💕

Chapter 3

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

Watching me, wanting me

I can feel you pull me down

Fearing you, loving you

I won't let you pull me down

Haunted (Evanescence)

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

Hours had passed since Neteyam Suli had appeared to you in the window of the kitchen you worked in.

It was late at night already and you should be sleeping but, you just could not stop thinking about what had happened. How weird it had been to see a real na'vi - not an Avatar - real close. How odd he looked in your eyes, massive in size and so, so blue...

You laughed alone in your small room in the back of the laboratory after taking a quarter of a second to realize that the thought you just had was actually really funny.

Neteyam looked like a huge and thick brushstroke of sky blue paint. Still, he was… incredibly beautiful. He was eerie, weird looking compared to the human guys you're used to, but… something about him made his face linger on your mind.

You did not know how it was possible that you were finally having to admit to yourself that you felt attracted to Neteyam Suli, even after he appeared to you only once and, let's not forget, he appeared completely unanticipated, saying he had seen you before, multiple times.

You knew that raised like a billion red flags. Yet still, even though you did not feel safe enough to trust him or let your hair down when he was around, he intrigued you immensely.

༊⁀➷

You woke up the next morning feeling anxious. You did not know what it was exactly, but, lately, you had not only been depressed, but anxious too. You knew you probably would be diagnosed with clinical depression and anxiety if you cared to go to the mental health department of the laboratory, but the thing was… you did not care to. You did not want to. The real reason for your lingering sadness was already so familiar to you: you did not like the life you were living.

You looked to be free like the na'vi. To not have deadly boring obligations everyday, to not have to care so much about so many strict rules of what was socially acceptable and what was not. You thought your own race to be too complicated. Humans don't really say what they mean just so many times. Humans care too much about money and power when, in reality, deep down, we all know that's not what's gonna make us happy, what's gonna keep us warm in a cold night.

But you were never really like that.

Not to pretend you were a golden, precious jewel, so incredibly hard to find, so utterly different from everybody else but, in all honesty, as much as you did care about money and having a comfortable life - to some extent - you were never a greedy for riches kind of person. You had always felt perfectly happy and content to just have a few things to keep you cozy, like your earbuds, a good book, your favorite sweet treat… You liked it simple. Calm. Balanced.

You believed that everything needs to be balanced to work well.

Chaos and light. Pain and happiness.

People need all of it to learn, grow and live a good life, that doesn't get painfully boring and unbearable with time.

But humans lacked balance.

Too much greed, too little contentment. Too much hate, too little compassion. Too much selfishness, too little altruism. That's why your kind was, as unfortunate as it was, doomed to misery. The human race dug their own grave. God, they couldn't even respect and take care of their own planet, their own home, the place that kept them literally safe and steady in the middle of the immense galaxy, let alone being able to take care of each other, to consider other's feelings before their own because, sometimes, we all need to do it.

And that's one of the reasons why you admired the na'vi so much. They were so much more wise than your own race.

How many times you had wished, talking to yourself in the dark of the night, that you could have been born na'vi. Why was fate so cruel to you? You did not even believe in fate. But it is only an expression, anyway.

༊⁀➷

Neteyam was tossing around on his mat since he went back home from training.

Yesterday he was way too busy to try and go see you or at least watch you from afar.

Sometimes he truly felt exhausted from his hectic routine and just wished he could be like Lo'ak and the other Omatikaya young men and just be able to relax more, to have more free time to engage in hobbies or, Eywa... to have more time to sleep... Sometimes he went back home all sore. He was as athletic as one can be but it did not mean he could not feel jaded after pushing himself too hard.

But Neteyam tried to always keep in mind the noble, sacred reason why he did all that. He was going to be the next leader of his clan, a privileged position, blessed by the Great Mother. A position that so many wished to have and he was lucky enough to be waiting to take on.

He was the current Olo'eyktan's son. It was a gift, he should not be ungrateful. He felt bad for thinking that was exactly what he was being... His father, Jake, was Toruk Makto. He was brave enough to earn that title. Neteyam felt it was his duty to be as brave and fearless as his father, to honor him and all his efforts to defend their tribe from any danger, specially from the Sky People.

Everything was going as usual, if it was not for only one thing: Lo'ak seemed to be suspicious of the fact that Neteyam was out for so many hours, almost everyday (meaning, every time he was free to just do whatever he wanted and not training to become the next Olo'eyktan of the Omatikaya) and nobody had a clue of where he was.

His parents seemed to be too busy being the Olo'eyktan and the Tsahìk to notice something seemed off about Neteyam's behavior lately. And it is understandable. It was anything but easy to be the clan leader and the clan healer and spiritual leader. Mo'at was getting old and had passed the position of Tsahìk to Neytiri a while ago. So, Jake and Neytiri already were making such a huge effort to be able to live up to their duties, be parents of a little girl, Tuktirey, three teenagers and still keep their sanity. It was a lot, indeed. But they tried as hard as they could to still be good enough for their clan, their family and for each other, as a mated couple.

Neteyam decided he was way too restless to be able to sleep that night. He could not stop thinking about the way that human male talked to you, looked at you... He wondered if he really was your mate. He was not sure but if what he thought when he saw you two together was true, he knew it would not be a problem. He hated to get violent, his natural self was calm and composed. But he was going to fight for you, and, if it needed to get bloody, then so be it.

He decided to go outside his and his family's home, to breathe some cold, fresh eclipse air. It helped him to calm down a bit but it was not enough. He missed you. Like crazy. Deeply. He craved your scent… your delicious human scent. He did not even believe he was saying that about the way a human smelled. But he would always insist in saying you were different. You had a na'vi heart. Just like his father, back when he was still all pink and small.

He decided he wanted… no, he needed to see you. And it could not wait. It had to be now. He craved you and that craving would not go away like that. It was stronger than his rational brain. You woke up his animal side more than anything else did. He wanted to mate with you as soon as possible. He dreamt about the day he would be able to breed you, have you carrying his offspring on your womb. He would make you so happy, give you everything you've ever wanted, everything you need. And while you were still not permanently living inside your Avatar body, he still wanted to have you, even if it meant having you in your demon form. You were a pretty, lovely demon. His cute, sweet demon girl. His yawntutsyìp. (little loved one)

༊⁀➷

You just could not believe it was really happening, how the hell you got into those circumstances.

Right before that moment, you were almost sleeping peacefully, finally (you know that state when you're not awake nor asleep?), after having been awake, tossing around on your bed for hours for the most ridiculous reason you could ever think of: you were undeniably crushing on that weird alien boy. Neteyam Suli.

Yes, he acted like a creep when he tapped on your window. You knew it was pathetic but… he just would not leave your mind. He was shamelessly living rent free in your brain. All cozy there.

But the worst and craziest part was: you were still afraid of him.

Ok, the na'vi were a peaceful, highly intelligent (arguably much more smart, interesting and wiser than humans) alien race but he was still almost 10 feet tall and was so freaking intimidating. You shivered at the thought that he could ever hurt you, even by accident, one day.

Still, you were now here with him. Outside the laboratory. Because he put his goddamn eerie but cute (the guy is a complete paradox) looking ocean colored fingers through the tiny gap you left open in your bedroom window - a passage you left for air to come in when it was really hot and dry, like it was that night - and that made a strange noise, enough to put you in alert mode.

Damn, what a bad habit… Leaving the window open, even slightly, was not even permitted by the people who took care of the lab's security norms. That could be dangerous. But you had always been a stubborn little thing.

You were now regretting your decisions, though. 

Neteyam approached your window being what he could be like a pro: a crazy stalker.

How you were still attracted to him… even though you were fearful of his na'vi build and strength… that was a question that maybe a mental health professional could answer. It was weird and problematic and you knew it. But you never imagined you would feel like this about Neteyam Suli. You really did not. When you first saw him, he seemed cute and handsome in your eyes, but he was still an alien. You had never considered being attracted to one. But now… nothing made sense anymore, things were getting weird.

Stupidity took over you when you were so sleepy and groggy and you saw it was his huge hand on the wooden window, so, you wanted to ask him why he ran away the last time you two spoke. You know when you're so sleepy, you make the most unimaginably silly mistakes? So… there you go. You dragged your heavy with slumber body out of your bed, grabbed your oxygen mask that was kept inside your closet and opened the window.

But why, though?

In the beginning, you two were having a trivial talk about mundane stuff, like how he learned the English language (his father, of course), he started to ask how and why you got an Avatar etc 

He acted suspicious but still normal-ish, for a na'vi. They always looked mysterious when interacting with humans. But then, when he was telling you about his little sister, Tuktirey, and your eyes were slowly falling shut, your body begging for some hours of sleep… you felt a change in the atmosphere around you.

Your eyes had closed for a while, on their own, and suddenly, you knew Neteyam was really close to you, now. He had been keeping a respectful distance in the beginning. But now… now he was inches away from your body. He had moved closer, his fleshy but toned blue thigh almost rubbing against your leg, as you were sitting sideways on the window frame, your legs hanging in the air, making you feel a bit cold because of the nighttime Pandoran air.

You woke up from your 5 seconds long involuntary nap really startled.

"Hey! Why are you… so close?" You looked at him, dazed and nervous, visibly shaken

"Sorry… Is it too much? You're just… so pretty…" Neteyam says, looking at you like he's looking at a graceful, otherworldly being.

"Yeah. It is." You warn him "Can you… step away a bit, please?" You said, looking into his eyes. Your gaze serious but amiable.

Neteyam respected your request and did what was decent. But you did not expect that he would soon change his demeanor, just like something was taking over him.

You were so distracted with your chat with Neteyam but so utterly sleepy too that you did not notice when your nightgown's thin strap slipped through your right shoulder, leaving your breast exposed, your nipple out for Neteyam to see.

It was like a beast had replaced that nice-but-weird-vibes guy you were previously talking to.

Neteyam had just lifted you off of the window with amazing ease, your feet now touching the ground and he got closer to you again. He had you with your back against the lab's outer wall, keeping you there just by being in front of you, looking at you.

His size was enough to keep you still. You did not want him to maybe get mad at you if you tried to run away. That could become terrifying in a heartbeat. You were brave since a child, but you were also realistic. Your height and body strength was nothing compared to Neteyam's.

He looked at your exposed breast with such desire, you felt like his amber gaze was scorching your sensitive skin.

"Neteyam! What-?"

"You're so… perfect." His breath was labored while he stared down at your nipple, hardened by the cold temperature of the eclipse air "Sevin…" (pretty)

"I'm so afraid of you, Neteyam... You're too big and honestly...scary. I'm so sorry. I'm always trying to pick up signals that may indicate you're gonna hurt me. I don't feel comfortable at all right now. Please, let me go" You said as your cold, anxious hands took your nightgown strap back to where it belonged, covering your boob again, feeling ashamed of the vulnerable way you had just been seen by Neteyam, ashamed of the fact that he, a boy you barely knew, had just seen your naked breast, even if it was only for a brief period of time

"My cute little 'emyu…" (cook, cooker) "You don't need to be afraid of me." He smiles at you in such a sincere way, trying to show you he means no harm whatsoever. 

Though Neteyam felt his heart tightening way too much inside his chest, hurting so much it was like you had crushed it when you said you're afraid of him, he was carefully trying to make you see he would never in a billion years harm you, his precious little yawne (loved one).

He wished so hard, even prayed to Eywa, in a millisecond, inside his mind, that you would soon realize he loved you so much he would kill anyone who ever hurt your precious, frail human body. He could not understand how you could think he himself would do such a horrible thing towards you.

When Neteyam saw you did not show any sign that you were beginning to trust him more, he said:

"Hì'i," (little, small in size) "please... I need you... I love your scent so much. I miss it everytime I'm away from you. I love the way your human skin smells. I do. I dream about you at night... " He gets closer to you slowly and carefully, caging you between the wall and his broad, crazily tall blue body, leaving no way for you to get away from him "C-can I touch you? Touch your skin?" Neteyam breathes, begging for you with his wide eyed gaze "Just for a little while, please..." He kneels down at the ground to be as close as he possibly can to your height "See? I'm not so tall anymore. Am I a little less scary now?" He smiles faintly, trying to cover his pain with a fake demonstration of joy.

Neteyam feels so insecure, without any guarantee that you will eventually let him in. But he will never give up on trying to be worthy of your love.

"You're always gonna be scary to me. Even when I'm in my Avatar, I think." Using a sharp na'vi knife to stab Neteyam's heart repeatedly would have hurt him less than that statement "I'm not as skilled as you are or experienced as you are when it comes to using a bow or anything like that. God, I can't even work a bow right. If you'd ever hurt me, even by accident I-"

"I can teach you." He interrupted "I will teach you everything I know about archery. I'm a great archer, you know? I like to call myself "Mighty Warrior". " He smiles, frowning a bit, trying to make a joke to make the situation a little lighter.

You seemed so afraid he was starting to not know what to do anymore to try to make you see you were safe with him. That he would defend you from any danger without any hesitation and not be the danger himself.

༊⁀➷

Taglist:

@kitsunefirewail

@tumblingdevils

@a-blog-name-2003

@xylobee

@nerdybouquetofkittens-blog

@henhouse-horrors

@lala-1516

@xylianasblog

@samistars

@lik0

@crazy4books1

@explosiongamora

@your-girl-mj

@darktyrantwinner

@sereisstuff

@yeosxxx

@die4niyahhh

@iman-lu

@manumanulau

@im-in-a-pansexual-panik

@hana-yuri

@thehoneymushroomhealer

@melllinaa

@annaibansworld

@siriuslysmoking

@avatar4eva

[hauntedwitch04]

Bday secret party

Remus Lupin x reader

Words: about 2.0k words

Warnings: pure and awesome fluff (after yesterday ahaha), lovely Remus, my obsession with Edimburgh

Author's note: Hi! Here another one shot fo the series for my birthday. Hope you like it loves.

Requests are open I Ask

My masterlist

Join the Taglist

Buy me a coffee - Patreon submission

Bday plan

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

"James, I swear if you said anything to her I will hang you upside down from the astronomy tower for an entire day." Remus says in a particularly annoyed and contrite tone.

The young werewolf immediately felt guilty for talking that way to his friend, but at the same time he couldn't believe that James had almost screwed up the whole plan he had designed to put on your birthday party. He had been planning everything down to the last detail for a month now, to make sure everything is perfect on your big day, and he couldn't let a chatty deer ruin everything just because he's careless.

He sees pure fear in his friend's eyes after threatening him with one of his greatest fears: height.

"Sorry." Whispers James, as he backs away slowly to make room for his friend, seeing that he is stressed right now. "But I swear she didn't understand anything. It just slipped out that I had to see you to arrange something, and I said it was my gift to her." Potter continues, as he looks at Sirius, who up to this moment had been silent. Immediately his best friend understands the plea for help and nods.

"Yes, she didn't understand anything, we were very good at lying to her." Says the older Black, as Regulus runs a hand over his face, remembering the scene that took place a short time ago in the Great Hall. Indeed James and Sirius had been good at creating a believable excuse, but I young Black knows you better than you think, and he had seen in your eyes the seed of doubt, and he knows that this is not good at all. In your group of friends you are known for having a sixth sense and a spirit of observation so keen that sometimes it seems you can read people's minds and, even, the future. The very moment they've said their shit, Regulus knows that some strange mechanisms have been activated in your mind that have caused you to weigh all possible options, and so he knows they're screwed.

"No, you have to excuse me. I didn't think organizing a birthday was so hard, but at the same time I want everything to be perfect for her, because she deserves it." Remus confesses, as he holds his head in his hands, trying to relax.

"You know she's going to say you're overreacting anyway and she doesn't deserve it." Regulus comments, as he puts away the last things for the party. Your birthday would be celebrated this evening, after a romantic walk between you and your fiancé. Remus had managed to convince the prefect with the Ravenclaw night shift to turn a blind eye, and would thus take you in front of the Room of Requirement, afterwards around the park, and there all your friends would surprise you. It was a well-thought-out plan, and it still doesn't explain how you didn't actually almost come to find out only today and not weeks before.

"Which is silly after all he gives every day for us." Sirius continues, as James nods, placing balloons on the wall. "Our mother deserves a proper celebration." The oldest Black concludes, making all three other boys laugh. "Ever since you and Remus got together, the boys started calling you the 'mom' of the group, since they always teased Remus for being their dad in a way, since he was the most responsible of the four.

When they finish laughing they go back to work to sort out the last few things for the party, knowing that it is now only a short time away. Right now you are supposed to be with the girls, whose job it is to distract you from the absence of your friends and your boyfriend, but Remus cannot help but keep fidgeting both behind every little detail and out of fear that at any moment you might walk in the door and find out why he has not been very close to you these past few weeks, but after all, part of him knows it might be because of the gift he gave you.

Remus keeps moving like a damned soul without rest for a while before Regulus stands up and blocks him with a hand on his shoulder.

"Man, everything is perfect, why don't you just relax for a moment?" The youngest among them asks the werewolf, but immediately Regulus sees in his friend's eyes that there is something else and not just what they are preparing that is upsetting him.

"There is something that doesn't give you peace." Regulus comments, and Remus says nothing, and just looks at him. "It's not like it's the gift you gave her, is it?" The Slytherin continues, marveling at the Gryffindor in front of him.

"How did you do that?" Lupin asks, increasingly shocked by young Black's prowess, when the other in response merely laughs.

"You were playing with a little box earlier, and can one read the doubt and fear in your eyes?" Regulus explains, continuing to laugh, while Remus in response rolls his eyes and looks at the clock, seeing that it was almost time to see you, so he gets up.

"It's almost time for our walk. Take care guys, the others should be here soon. Don't screw up please." Lupin asks as he looks at his friends, who reassure him and give him pats of encouragement.

"Go and return victorious with the lady messer Lupin." Sirius says, giving him a sort of bow, just before Remus walks out the door. He turns and as a last thing gives him a middle finger, after promising never to let him see "The princess bride" again.

Remus could feel his own heart beating in his throat as he saw you coming downstairs in simple jeans and his favorite sweater. You are simply perfect in his eyes, and nothing could change his mind.

"Finally, it seems like I haven't seen you in forever. Where have you been until now?" You ask curiously, seeing him a little stressed. "Are you okay? You look a little pale honey."

Immediately his heart warms at hearing your concern, and he can't help but think that maybe those nutty friends of his are right to call you "mom," and gently the boy shakes his head.

"I'm fine honey, maybe I just need to get some air. Would you like to take a ride with me?" He asks, and he doesn't even have to wait a second for an answer, as like a hurricane you pounce on him, taking him under your arm and running toward the school grounds. You walk around the lawns for a while, laughing and joking like you haven't in a long time. Nothing could dent your mood, and nothing exists apart from each other at this moment.

From the outside, one can see obvious the love you feel for the other person, only from your eyes, more than from your gestures, which seem to sing the most beautiful love song ever heard.

Hours seem to pass, then Remus looks at his watch and realizes that you are running late, so with the excuse that he has to catch another prefect in one of the side corridors to get the keys to a closet for the next prank James and Sirius are planning, he takes you in front of the mystery room. He's never felt more flustered than he does right now, and he's doubtful whether to give you the gift now or later, when you, damned curious as usual, lean out and touch the door.

"How come the room of needs is visible?" Ask curiously, as you watch him break into a cold sweat and try to play the part of the one who hides nothing.

"I have no idea my dear, try opening it and see what's behind it." Try suggesting Remus, as he rests a hand on your shoulder to guide you into the darkness of the room that opens before you. A few seconds pass and just as you're wondering what the point of it all is, the lights come on and all your friends pop out from behind couches and armchairs, shouting who "surprise" who "happy birthday," but all with beaming smiles on their lips as they come to hug you.

You immediately feel tears in your eyes, which you let run, because of the happiness and excitement they made you feel seeing so many people gathered to celebrate you.

Once you've greeted everyone you turn to Remus, who looks at you smiling, his hands behind his back.

"Did you arrange everything?" You ask in amazement as you look around and try to memorize every single detail of everything around you. "You didn't have to-"

"Yes I had to. You deserve this and much more than I can give you, you deserve the world, indeed the universe. And it wasn't just me, everyone helped me in some way." He interrupts you, as he circles your shoulders with one arm, and you hold him even tighter to you, squeezing his waist. "I love you, and all I want to do is remind you of that every day, but today especially, after all it's your day, and we all came here just for you, because we all love you, me more than all of them." He continues, resting his forehead on yours. Then he freezes for a moment, right for a few seconds and pulls out a box from his pants pocket.

"I want to give you my present now, because I want you to think about it." He says and you, confused for the umpteenth time this evening, wipe away the last of your tears and then pick up the box he is handing you. It is a black velvet box, and when you open it you see a pair of keys. You look up not understanding what they were, so your boyfriend explains.

"These are the keys to an apartment in Edinburgh, in your favorite area, which I may or may not have asked an old family friend to rent to me and my girlfriend, once I finished school, if she wanted to move in with me. What do you say, what will she decide?" He asks as he strokes your face and tucks a strand of hair behind your ear. You can't help but cry again before you go back to hugging him, just enough to take his breath away, your arms wrapped around his neck.

"I don't even have to think about it, the answer is obviously yes idiot." You whisper between the kisses you leave all along his face, making him laugh, while a few tears escape him as well. "You know you're pretty dumb for the smartest guy I know, it was obvious my answer was yes. And me thinking for a moment today that you had found a new girlfriend and were going to break up with me, damn how stupid I am."

Both of you laugh, still clasped in each other's arms, enjoying that closeness you had missed so much.

"I love you more than my own life, how could I ever look for another girl, when I have the most perfect girl that exists in the whole universe?" Remmy says in a whisper in your ear.

"I love you too Lupin, but you don't have to suck up, look you've already won your reward tonight." You counter by winking at him and he jokes by raising his eyebrows and whispering "I won, let's hurry up and leave this party then," making you laugh, until that sweet moment is interrupted as usual by the grace of Sirius Mr.Elegance of the Year Black.

"Do you want to be part of the party too, or are you going to be lovebirds the whole party?" He asks to throw a handful of confetti at you.

"I guess your reward will have to wait for Lupin." You say, as you hear him laugh, and together you go to enjoy this party with your friends, while in your mind already what will happen tonight in your own personal after party.

TAGLIST

• @shadowolf993 @sadblueberry721 @goldenharrysworld @fairy-witch-bitch @xoxoloverb @idli-dosa @rainelikerain @s-we-e-t-t-ea @daph-505 @nyx2021 @vjmoral @duda @drayshadow @siriusstwelveyears @highwayhunch @uwiuwi @itsmeseph @sassyrebelrockerprincess @highwayhunch @siriuslydestiny @haushinka27 @moonysluvrboy @maraurderssimpcuzwhytfnot @sgchamberlain @nyotamalfoy @eichenhouseproperty @mxmxnto-mori @anonimusy @raajali3 @helloitsmeeeeeee @standarizedpumpkins @maraurderzkinnie @omenhel @esposadomd @yourpurrrrrfect @the-ruler-of-death @dylanobriens-love @starvedxcupid @dittos-blog-dylanobrien @digitalhearts @percymylove @kayden666 @nightfiress @backups-backups @bless-my-demons @dudenhaaa27 @daeneeryss @starsval @rorysreallyrandom @superbookwormy64 @hjgdhghoe @mortica-raven13 @theviewfromtheotherside @watersquirtpewpewboomm @harleycao @yomomsgf @vixparker @imnotcryingurcrying @shitidksstuff

[thenyoumightaswellwrestleangels]

There is a curse in me that will not sleep (and a home in you that will not leave)

Day 1 of Thank You, Haikyuu - event masterlist here

pairing: hinata shouyou x reader (gn) x kageyama tobio

length: 7.6k

genre: fairytale au !! fluff, hurt/comfort

warnings: very vaguely beauty and the beast inspired, a bit of miscommunication but it's all resolved in the end, I know it's angsty but I promise there's a happy, comforting ending and everybody ends up alright, basically just a lot of emotional stress but that's my trademark by now

a/n: woooow ok au week has officially begun !! I am still kinda scrambling to get all of these finished in time ahaha but this first one is monumentous so I hope everyone enjoys <3

tags: @love-and-lore

It's not often that you see Hinata Shouyou this way, weary and sullen, with his brows furrowed and his gaze turned down. It looks wrong on him, like he's wearing someone else's face - someone else problems. So, of course, you throw the rag you'd been using over your shoulder and flip the open sign by the window of the tavern, quietly sending your barback home for the evening as you make your way over to Shouyou.

He's so distracted by whatever's going on in his mind, so wrapped up in the heaviness of running a town like this that he doesn't even notice your presence until you tap your knuckles on the wood of the bar next to him. 

"Did you want a refill?" You offer gently. Shouyou just blinks, spinning on his stool to see the empty tavern before turning back to you.

"You're closed. I should go, I don't want to bother - why isn't anything cleaned or put away? Where's that new barback you hired?" You laugh at his jumble of words - the way his mind bounces around is nothing new to either of you and serves as a comfort that he isn't too far gone right now. You take his cup away from him despite his gentle protests, frowning as he lets you peel his fingers off of it so that you can dump out his ale, serving him a new, fresh pint.

"I sent him home," you say easily. "There isn't much to do tonight, I can take care of it myself."

"You work too hard."

"What were you thinking about?" Shouyou shoots you his best attempt at a scathing look when you dodge his comment, but he turns into such a lovesick puppy when you're around that the effect of it falls short. You merely cross your arms and raise your brows as you wait for him to speak.

"I'm… worried," he sighs eventually, shoulders sagging in defeat as he admits it.

"Cleary," you quip back gently, moving to begin wiping down tables. "What about, though?"

"Did you know they're raising taxes again?" He says quietly. You sigh and pause your cleaning, rolling out the tension in your shoulders - or trying to.

"I thought you had some say in that?" You ask. Shouyou scowls into his cup.

"This may be my town to look after, but I'm only a nobleman. When the royal family demands it, even I have to obey." You hum in understanding as you throw your rag onto the bar and move to begin hauling benches up and onto the tables. Shouyou makes an alarmed, disbelieving sort of sound and shoots to his feet to gently shoo you away, picking up benches in your place.

You roll your eyes, of course, making a big show of huffing and mumbling under your breath about how you can do it yourself. He just smiles in that gentle way of his and you know that the heat in your face and the honest care in his eyes as you move to put up the small chairs, instead, give away the show of it all.

Hinata Shouyou is in love with you because you let him be - desperately against your better judgment. 

"We've dealt with raised taxes before, Shouyou," you say quietly. "We'll be ok."

"For how long?" He snaps back, holding his hands up in surrender when you shoot him a look. "I just mean that there's a limit. I'm worried about… well, I'm worried about the whole town. There's only so much the people can take."

"So what will you do?" You ask as he puts up the final bench and lets you usher him back to his seat at the bar - the only chair you'd left available. 

"I'm… going to talk to the prince." That makes you pause, eyes wide as you stare at him.

"No you're not," you say quickly. Shouyou looks at you with a care that rattles you, an apologetic sort of love showing on his face.

"He's going to help me… he has to. It's the only option I have." You sigh at Shouyou's words and grip the edge of the bar.

"People are warned away from that castle for a reason, Shouyou," you say quietly. "The king banished his son there for a reason. The forest is impassible for a reason."

"I know, my beloved." You don't even have the heart to chastise him for calling you that when he pulls himself to his feet and sweeps his way around the bar to stand in front of you, the silk of his shirt shimmering under the dull, flickering candlelight. His hands grip yours firmly and he pulls them up to press kisses across your palms, making you scoff and turn your head away. The gold of his rings are cool against your skin and the jewels in them shine, reflecting their colours onto the stains of your apron. 

"I must," Shouyou goes on to say. "I must do what needs to be done to take care of this town… to take care of you."

"You will not die stupidly for me." Your voice warbles as you speak and you curse yourself for it. Shouyou just smiles, keeping his fingers intertwined with your own so that he can swing your connected hands back and forth between the two of you.

"I will not," he says firmly. "I will leave at first light tomorrow and be home by dusk. You'll see. Before the flowers on your mantle wilt, I will be back here with you, beloved."

It takes two days for the petals on your flowers to start curling and falling, two days without Shouyou's return before you've driven yourself mad enough to go after him, entrusting the tavern to your young, nervous barback and setting off on your horse. It takes another day entirely to maneuver through the dense wood that separates the town from its wretched, looming castle, the trees thick and sturdy and blanketing the forest floor in darkness. 

You wonder, in a crawling, frightened sort of way, if Shouyou's out here somewhere in the depths - if you'll stumble over his body being taken by the forest. 

But it does not happen. Nothing happens until you stumble, finally, onto the castle, dark and crumbling, with ivy crawling up the walls and moss covering the stone. Once, you can tell, it was beautiful, but that age of it seems to have died out long ago and the remnants stand haunting and silent until the end of time.

The silence, of course, you test as you shove open the great doors and stumble into the vast, arched entryway. There are no soldiers, no footmen or maids or anyone. There is only you and the silence and the sliver of light from the open doorway. 

Maybe it was the nervous whining of your horse outside, her hoof pawing at the ground, that made enough noise to draw attention. Maybe it was your own fault with the way you pushed open the doors. Maybe it was - well, it doesn't matter, you suppose, as the prince himself stomps down a spiralling, ornate staircase and towards you, regal cape flying out behind him and scowl clear on his face.

"Go," he spits angrily, the fury rolling off of him like thunder as he points out the open door behind you. You remember, somewhere far away, of the stories you've heard - of his endless pride and selfish ego, of the day he was banished by his parents, sent to live in exile while his sister was groomed to take the throne instead of him.

You should leave, you think haltingly. You should run and remind yourself how lucky to are to have a life to flee back to, you should -

"Don't be rude," you snap instead. The prince, for what it's worth, merely stares at you and holds his hand to his chest, recoiling from the way you slapped his pointed finger away from you. "I'm looking for someone."

"There's no one here," he says back, voice heated and loud. You cross your arms.

"Perhaps not now, but he would have passed through. It's Hinata Shouyou, the nobleman presiding over the town -"

"I know who my own nobleman is." Tobio''s voice is thunderous, echoing in the otherwise empty entrance hall. You snap your mouth shut for just a moment. 

"Perhaps then, you'd be helpful enough to know where he is." Surely, you shouldn't speak to royalty like this, you think distantly. But surely, an exiled prince living in a crumbling castle of a time long gone, a living ghost residing in a relic of the past, cannot threaten as much harm as you've been led to believe. 

"He is gone," he says simply before turning, his cape swinging elegantly to hit you across the knees, causing you to stumble as you chase after him.

"When? Where? Wh -" Your incessant questions have Tobio turning from halfway up the staircase, scowling down at you where you skid to a halt and look up at him.

"He, smarter than you perhaps, left when he realized that his trip was fruitless. You will, as well," he says stubbornly. You begin up the stairs again and he tips his head back and sighs.

"He never returned home," you shout back stubbornly, your voice matching the volume of his, ricocheting off the stone around you. "He could be dead because of you, lost somewhere out there and gone and -"

But not even your voice, loud as it is, is enough to drown out the crack of thunder outside, booming and quaking as dark stormclouds stir over the horizon, beginning to blanket the land in darkness. 

"The sun is beginning to set," Tobio says rather quietly. "Anyone would die trying to cross the wood at night." You turn to face the open doors at his words, your eyes wide and jaw tight at the darkening sky and the onslaught of rain that begins over the valley. Your hand grips the bannister of the staircase as you stare, as you consider the possibility of dying tonight alone in the wood, of never going home and seeing daybreak again. 

"The valley will flood," you say quietly, eyes still trained on the darkness outside. "The wood will turn to a marsh and the landslides will block the trails. I will not make it home tonight." 

"I am not so fool as to be unaware of the weather," the prince says haughtily, making your hand tighten on the gold leaf of the bannister in anguish. You wonder painfully, for a moment, if this is what happened to Shouyou, if he was sent to his death so uncaringly, as well.

But then Tobio sighs like he's been burdened by something great and turns to continue up the stairs.

"A room will be prepared for you here. You will leave at first light when the rain stops."

You realize at dinner that night, that perhaps the prince is not as alone as you'd all thought - the realization comes to you as you shift in your plush velvet seat at the large banquet table, servers appearing on either side of you to load rich, delicate food onto your plate. 

But something sits heavily in your heart as you think back to the way he'd demanded that you dine with him, the way his eyes stared hollowly at the long, empty table. It must be a curse, you think, to have such space in your heart and home and no one to fill it. You wonder if you could even tell yourself you have a home at all in such conditions.

But then you think of Shouyou, of his beaming smile and kind eyes and soft, firm hands, and the kindness you've been fostering is tampered out again. 

"How could you not help him?" You say abruptly, letting your cutlery clatter onto your plate as you sit back in your chair.

"I beg your pardon?"

"Your people are suffering and you sit here living in lavish solitude and turning away the one person who was brave enough to ask you for help."

"Asking is an interesting way of putting it," Tobio says dryly. You falter, unsure of his meaning and letting your words die out.

"What… exactly happened here when Shouyou came to you?" You ask eventually.

"It is none of your concern." He looks away stubbornly, the candlelight illuminating a faint dusting of blush across his cheeks. It must be from the wine, you tell yourself. Nothing more.

"He is my concern," you snap. The prince stares at you, then, something deep and looming in his eyes that you can't place - something that makes you shift again as his gaze bores into you.

"What a life you live, having someone to make you act in such a way," he says softly. You splutter out a defence about how you're friends and look away. The shadows of the pillar candles flicker and splashes of light dance over your faces, like the golden heat is trying desperately to breathe life into this cursed place.

"You have not told me why you will not help," you say in lieu of addressing his comment and his disbelief at your denial.

"And I will not," he responds stubbornly. Your eyes narrow as you glare at him, crossing your arms over your chest.

"You're lying." Perhaps, you think desperately as he slams his fist against the abruptly, you've hit a nerve. Perhaps Shouyou was right all those times he told you that this mouth of yours will get you into trouble.

But then the prince sighs and murmurs something about this being his second tiresome overnight guest and you perk up, locking onto him again.

"The second? You mean -"

"Yes, of course, your beloved Shouyou stayed for far too long - days, in fact. What did you think happened to him?" Tobio says cavalierly. You huff and run a hand through your travel-dampened, tangled hair - much to Tobio's displeasure.

"Why didn't you lead with that?" You snap. "He was probably on his way back to me as I left - he's probably arriving home now and thinks I'm dead - or worse, stuck here with you." That comment, you think mildly, probably wasn't necessary, but the scowl on the prince's face is reward enough. 

"Then he's home," he spits the word. "And he's safe. There is nothing to be concerned about." Tobio says it like it's final, like there's no ill will that could befall the two of you now, but as you look out the stained glass window toward the night sky and the storm that stretches endlessly onward through flashes of white-hot lightning, you fear that the worst is yet to come. 

As Shouyou stands in your empty tavern, listening to your barback stammer on about how you'd left to go after him and haven't returned yet, he thinks that there is no pain like this, no fear like what he feels now, knowing that you're alone in that cursed wood because of him.

It's begun raining, thunder crashing in the sky and lightning striking down from above and illuminating the horizon as it stretches over the valley. There is no way you'll survive a night in the wood like this, Shouyou realizes as he stumbles to a bench, sagging down onto it and putting his head in his hands. There is no hope on a night like this. 

So he stands abruptly, declaring that he's going after you, when the barback all but throws himself in front of the door to stop him.

"You'll die out there," he says earnestly. Shouyou's hands tremble as he clenches them into fists so tightly that his knuckles turn white.

"They could already be dead," he snaps.

"And if they aren't, then you're just killing yourself." Shouyou tries to remember the name of the trembling boy in front of him. Yamaguchi, he thinks you'd said once. But then he thinks of you again and a crash of thunder rattles the glasses on the bar.

"There's no use in both of you dying tonight," Yamaguchi says quietly, his voice shaking as his eyes grow wet. Shouyou sighs and puts a hand on the boy's shoulder gently, a comforting sort of apology as his shoulders sag and defeat takes hold of him.

"At first light, then," he says stiffly, and a flash of lightning illuminates the gaunt fear on his face. Yamaguchi finds himself wishing that you'd never left home at all. 

That night, you're aware, should've been a fitful sleep with the large bed chamber and silken sheets and mounds of pillows that you're surrounded with. After dinner that night, Tobio had had you well taken care of - a hot bath drawn for you and fresh clothes laid out, the fireplace lit and glowing golden and the bed given fresh linens.

But there had been something eating at you all night, something akin to guilt clawing at you from the inside as you thought of Shouyou out there, lost and without you, while you luxuriate in bed. When you wake from your turbulent night - from nightmares of the nobleman that had you tossing and turning, all hopes of returning to him are stamped out by the darkness that still swirls overhead.

The storm, you realize when you run to the large, ornate window, is still raging, darkening the endless sky and wreaking havoc over the land. There will be no returning home for you today, and there will be no safety found in Shouyou's arms.

Three days, the cursed storm lasts, raging overhead and causing the ancient castle to shutter and sway. Three days of you trapped in this stone maze with Tobio, trailing after him to ask why, why, why couldn't he bring himself to be a good person just once? It's late in the evening, on the third night, when the two of you find yourselves having cracked open a bottle of wine and sitting on the lavish, soft rug that lays in front of the great fireplace in his lounge. It had taken some convincing - and some drinks to get him down there, but the wine has begun flowing easily and Tobio, you realize delightedly, is almost relaxed. 

He softens a bit more, much to his own displeasure, when you sway with how tipsy you are, leaning into him so closely that he can feel your breath on his lips. But then he looks down at you and the sparkling mirth in your eyes and he finds them clear and alert - not nearly as hazed from the wine as he'd expected to see.

"You're drunk," he murmurs anyway. You just smile.

"No more than you," you point out, letting your gaze flicker down to his lips for just a moment. It's enough, you learn quickly, to make him lean into you, closer and closer and melding his body to yours.

It's the wine jumbling his own thoughts, Tobio assures himself, that leads him to close the gap, pressing his lips to yours and tangling a hand in your hair. He makes a small, whining noise somewhere in the back of his throat, something burning in him at the touch of you against him - at the touch of something living against the ghost that he's become. 

When you part, your chests heaving a bit too much and your lips both kiss bitten and reddened, he sighs and tips his head back to thump against the settee that you're both leaning against. 

"No wonder the two of you are so in love when you're both so ready to use your wiles to get what you want from me," Tobio murmurs, his eyes closed enough that he doesn't notice you staring at him.

"What does that mean?" You ask breathily. He snaps his head up and looks at you with wide eyes.

"Nothing," he says hastily. "I don't know what I was saying."

"Oh my god," you say bluntly, seemingly ignoring his assurances that he was simply talking nonsense because of the wine. "You slept with -"

"It doesn't matter," Tobio all but whines, petulantly screwing his eyes shut and refusing to look at you. You just laugh, though, a loud and honest thing as you pat his shoulder comfortingly. Tobio opens one eye wearily and you're smiling at him gently, not a hint of mocking to be found in your gaze.

"I don't blame you," you shrug. "He's… well, he's Shouyou." Things quiet down significantly at that and you sober noticeably as you look out the window towards the blackened, stormy sky. 

"He will come for you," Tobio says somberly.

"He shouldn't have to," is your simple response.

"Why do you deny him?" Tobio's fingertip traces over your exposed shoulder where your shirt's slipped in your tipsy, giggly state and thinks back to when he gave you the clothes, to when you spluttered and looked away and told him how inappropriate it would be for you to wear his belongings. But you hadn't brought anything with you, as he'd pointed out, and silk often feels nicer than three-day-old cotton.

"He doesn't really love me," your quiet, sullen words make Tobio pause, his fingers freezing on your skin as he considers what you've said. "He asked me to marry me again before he left, you know."

"Again?" Tobio asks breathily, cursing himself for the weak sound of his own voice. You hum in affirmation.

"For the third time, yes." You swirl your wine in your cup as you speak, something lonely and hollow flitting through your eyes that reminds Tobio a nauseating amount of himself.

"Why?" He asks simply, pulling his hand away from you as something clenches in his heart, as something in him aches. It's loneliness, he knows, deep and penetrating. Jealousy, perhaps. 

"He's noble," you say it like it's obvious. "He can't marry someone like me. It's fun, but that's all - like a little bubble of happiness that has to burst one day." You pluck at the rug as you speak, pulling at threads that are worth more than your home. You wonder what home you'll have to return to, after all this.

Tobio, sitting next to you and reeling from your words, can't fathom why you think so lowly of yourself when you look up at him, beautiful and kind and smart as a whip. As you sigh and reach for the wine bottle, topping up your cup and then pouring into his without comment, he wonders what it must be like to find home in someone like you.

Shouyou, as he wades through the forest paths towards the end of the storm, clings desperately to any semblance of home that he once had with you. He's not sure it was worth it to wait until the weather began to clear, although if Yamaguchi had his way, he'd be waiting until the rain slowed even more before setting out. The boy had been near tears again when Shouyou'd announced that he was going now, and by foot so as not to risk his horse's safety. 

He wonders, in a nagging, guilty way, if that boy is about to inherit the life of someone else - if he's about to mourn the people who he's just begun to call home. 

But three days of wondering if you died to try to save him was enough to drive Shouyou to hysteria, pushing him out and into the cold, back towards the towering trees and wall of darkness. As he wades through broken branches and felled trees and tumbling rocks and floods, he thinks about you all the while - about every moment, every fleeting glance.

He thinks about the first time he'd asked you to marry him, earnest and honest and caught up in puppy love. You'd laughed at him then, reminded him that he'd only known you for a week since you'd moved to town and opened the tavern. You'd asked him, at the time, what your favourite flower was, and when he didn't have an answer, you asked how he could possibly know that he wanted to marry you if he didn't even know you.

You'd assumed, of course, that that would be the end of it, that he must have just been some flirt who thought his money and influence earned him the right to toy with who he pleased. But Shouyou is nothing if not persistent, and day after day he appeared by your side, his gaze only growing more lovesick as time wore on.

He thinks, as he slips on a mossy rock and stumbles into knee-deep mud, about the second time he asked you to marry him, a few years after that. You'd hired your barback, much to Shouyou's relief, and you'd chosen a shy young boy who needed coin and a bit of life experience and someone kind to help him get it. He'd watched you help Yamaguchi throughout the day, showing him how to run the tavern, how to pour the ale, how to check to see if the bread was rising well.

Shouyou had looked past you, then, at the vase of orchids that you kept by the counter, at your favourite flowers. He'd gotten them for you days ago, he'd remembered, so it must have almost been time for some new ones. When you'd come over to refill his cup, he'd asked you again to marry him. You'd laughed - again, and told him to ask again when he was sober, pressing a kiss to his cheek and stopping to water your orchids on your way past him.

The third time, of course, was the night before he'd left. He'd stopped by the tavern as the sun began to rise and bathe the town in a dripping, golden glow that stretched beyond the valley and towards the looming wood. Standing next to his horse, he'd let you clutch his hands in yours as tightly as you'd needed to, shushing your worries gently and pressing a soft kiss to the crown of your head. You were scared for him, notably, in a way that made his heart ache as he realized how foreign the sight of you trembling and nervous was. He'd asked you to marry him again, in that moment, whispering it against your hair as you let your face tuck into the safety of his chest. You'd squeezed his hands tighter at that, and Shouyou braced himself yet again for another no when you'd looked up at him earnestly, instead.

You'd made him promise to come home to you safely. You'd promised that you'd say yes when he returned to you without harm.

Alone in the wood, in the dead of night, slipping on loose rocks and mud, Shouyou desperately wishes he'll get to see you again - that he'll get to hear that yes. But something in him stirs painfully, a worry nagging at his gut. What is he to do, he wonders, without a home anymore? What is he to do without you?

Waking up in the morning with a raging wine hangover and Tobio's arms wrapped around you is certainly a jarring surprise, one that has you shooting up from where the two of you had fallen asleep on the plush rug. He's groaning and throwing a hand over his eyes to block out the light and ward off his headache, you assume, when the realization that light is streaming in through the windows catches your attention. 

The storm, you realize as you look out towards the clear, rolling horizon, is finally passing. You turn to tell Tobio, to announce to him that you can finally return home, when you're faced with him sitting up and leaning back on his hands as he looks out past you towards the shimmering, golden sun that illuminates the crumbling corners of the place he's lived in for so long.

His face, hard and solemn, has you snapping your mouth shut. You both understand the truth - you will leave and he will disappear again, returning to roam the halls of a life that should not belong to the living, eternally alone in this curse of his.

"Tobio -"

"I'll send a messenger ahead," he interrupts you. It's the first time you've said his name, he notices immediately, and it rings through his heart in a painful, abrupt way. He can't remember the last time someone said his name. He notices, rather painfully, that he'd almost forgotten someone could. "That way your beloved Shouyou will know you're safe and you can wait for the forest paths to be cleared a bit before you leave."

You should disagree, you know - you should fling yourself out the grand front doors and never look back, returning to your sunshine love and the life that you've built for yourself. But you move, instead, to sit on the settee next to Tobio's head and place a hand on his shoulder, agreeing quietly. There is a sadness that pours off of him, oozing onto the floorboards and seeping into your soul. There is something about him that makes you stay, some cursed sort of pull that brings you closer.

You stay by his side more than you should - and you know that, somewhere deep down and ignored. You don't sit opposite him at breakfast, separated by the long banquet table. You sit next to him, letting your hands brush accidentally every now and then as you eat.

"It is wrong," he says quietly, toward the end of the meal. You freeze, the closeness between you feeling sweltering as Tobio points it out. "The raising taxes, the treatment of the people… I know it's wrong."

Oh, you think slowly, right. There is more to this world than the hand that brushes against yours.  

"Then why not change it?" You ask slowly, tilting your head to look up at him. He stares ahead, at the faded family crest on the chipped wall and the dust that's collected on it.

"My family stopped listening to me a long time ago. I am… powerless, these days. There is nothing I could do."

"Oh," you say flatly, letting your hands twist in your lap. You consider that perhaps you should've known that - should've known that someone so cast out would lose any ties, watching them sever over time as the vines climbed higher over his castle walls and sealed him away from the world. "Tobio, I'm sorry -"

"My father is too old to carry the crown these days. He's stepping down… my sister's coronation will be within the month." He says abruptly, moving past your sorrow, your sympathy. You suppose it means nothing to someone whose life is already dead, already mourned for and buried. 

"Will you… go?" You ask hesitantly. He shakes his head.

"Of course not. But I will write. I love my sister, as much as I am capable. It's not enough, I know, but I hope it will be sufficient to sway her. A plea from her brother must mean something, still… and the people do not deserve to suffer by my family's hand." He says it like it's simple, like his words ring with undisputable truth. But it's in your nature to dig up mountains when you find them in your way.

"You are capable of love, Tobio," you say simply, the firmness in your voice making him pause and stare at you intently. "I've seen it." Tobio just scoffs at your words, though, earnest as they are. 

"You don't understand what you're saying," he says, his voice hard. You frown at him as you lean back in your chair, crossing your arms.

"What is it that you think you are? Hm? What is it that you're so afraid of me seeing? I have spent three days with you, Tobio, and you are no more than a man." You say stubbornly. The prince looks at you hard, his eyes dark, striking against the backdrop of the golden sun pouring through the windows and into his life.

"Monsterous things don't often show themselves as monstrous things." Tobio's voice is as icy as he can make it, cold and cutting and sharp. But it wavers, ever so slightly, caught by the voice of a boy who lost everything before he'd even been given a chance to learn how to hold it.

"There is nothing monstrous in you," you respond gently, leaning towards him. He leans back, away from you, away from the light that you pour into him. "You are beloved to me and that is all."

"Stop," he says firmly, squeezing his eyes shut as if your words burn through him. "Don't say that."

"What?" You push. "The truth? Don't say that I love -"

But commotions, you've found, always hit at the worst of times, and a shouting, banging disturbance down in the direction of the entrance hall draws the two of you away from each other. Tobio, for his part, sighs like a knife blade had been lifted from his neck and stands quickly to attend to the issue, leaving you to run after him and through the winding, dark halls.

Shouyou's yelling voice is what greets you when you get closer, the volume of it carrying throughout the castle as the panicked spluttering of the messenger that had been sent out hours ago follows. You nearly trip over yourself rushing to the hall to meet him, to see him looking up at you, dirty and tired and desperate. 

Shouyou meets you at the bottom of the staircase, having gotten over his initial shock of seeing you here and alive and well so that he can crush you into a hug, a hand cupping the back of your head protectively as he holds you against him and buries his nose into your hair.

You hold onto him, of course, gripping onto his shirt as tears blur your vision and wet his collar. He shushes you with all the gentleness that you remember, swaying you back and forth to comfort you as he tightens his arms around you and whispers delicate promises in your ear that he's here, that you're alright and he'll take you home. 

And Tobio… Tobio watches, looks on from the staircase at the two of you coming home to each other and feels the walls closing in on him, feels the gilded, arched ceiling press down, down, deeper into his soul. 

Shouyou pulls away from you just enough to grip your face gently in his hands, tilting your head back and forth so that he can look at you thoroughly and make sure you're unharmed. Fortunately… you're really fine. Three days of lavish living with fine meals and lavender baths have treated you well, and you look up at Shouyou with shining eyes and a bright face.

He looks just past you, then, as if he's finally noticing the prince sweep down the rest of the staircase towards the two of you. He… blushes when their eyes meet and shifts on his feet, but there's a cold, impassive stare on Tobio's face.

"You may stay as long as you need to recuperate after your journey. Then… you may be off. The tax problem will be dealt with." Tobio disappears at that, spinning on his heel and gliding up the stairs, leaving the two of you alone in the vast emptiness of the hall.

You're with Shouyou in the bedroom that you'd begun to call your own later that evening, with him freshly washed and in new clothes and sitting by your side on the settee by the window. You're curled up against him, letting him hold an arm over your shoulder and stroke up and down your arm gently. 

"What happened between you and Tobio?" You ask suddenly, causing Shouyou to freeze against you. He coughs a bit, clearing his throat and shifting as he looks out the window instead of at you. The sun is beginning to set, painting the sky in violets and pinks as it begins to dip below the horizon that stretches on over the valley.

"I… tried to convince him," he says carefully. "And I failed."

"Mhmm," you respond easily, a teasing note entering your voice that makes Shouyou blush. "But you tried really hard, didn't you?"

"I -" he clears his throat again. "I… yes. I did." You laugh at that, relief painting Shouyou's features as you melt further against him and squeeze his hand comfortingly.

"I got wine drunk and made out with him… if knowing that makes you feel better," you shrug. Shouyou sits up so fast that he jostles you, making you grumble as you sit up, too. He stares at you, mouth open in shock for a moment, before tipping his head back and laughing, pulling you into a close hug. 

"He's really not what he's made out to be," Shouyou says quietly, swaying the two of you back and forth where you sit, your legs tangled together on the settee.

"Yea…" you respond, tipping your head back to look up at him somberly. "Some people are like that…" Shouyou looks down at you softly, stroking a hand over your cheek as you peer up at him. He says your name quietly, an earnest sort of prayer given to you as he smooths his thumb over your cheek.

"Shouyou…" you whisper back, pulling yourself closer to him as you grip onto the front of his shirt.

"Will you marry me?"

"…What about Tobio?" Shouyou laughs at your question, letting his head drop to your shoulder and sighing before dropping a kiss to your neck.

"I think that perhaps…" he begins slowly, lifting his head to look at you again, his face serious. "Perhaps our beloved Tobio has been the lonely prince for too long." You smile in a quiet sort of way at Shouyou's declaration, pulling yourself closer to press a gentle, firm kiss on his lips. 

He makes a shocked sort of noise in the back of his throat before pulling you closer, a hand cupping the back of your neck to keep you against him. When you do finally part, he makes a point not to stray too far, resting his forehead against yours and grinning broadly.

"Do you have any idea how many years I've been waiting for you to do that?" He asks breathlessly. You giggle a bit and kiss him again, a quicker, lighter touch of your lips against his.

"Ask me again," you murmur, your lips brushing his.

"Will you marry me?" He's choked up by now, his voice warbling and eyes watery.

"Yes," you respond earnestly. Outside, the sun finally dips below the vast, reaching horizon and drowns the world in darkness, but Shouyou holds you to his chest and presses kisses to your ring finger while the fireplace glows with the heated embers of the evening's flames and the sound of home calls to you. 

The days, admittedly, start to blend after that, with you and Shouyou taking up residence in the castle under the guise of him recovering. He is recovering, you assure yourself, it's just… taking a while. Surely… surely there's nothing else keeping you here, no ghost walking these halls that's drawing you to this life.

It's over breakfast one morning, the three of you taking up space at one end of the long banquet table, when Tobio announces that he's received a letter from his sister. 

"She was… responsive," he says carefully, like the touch of joy seeping into his tone is something that he shouldn't be allowed to hold onto. "It was good to have her hear my pleas. She will be better in our parents' stead. She will be a better leader."

"And you?" Shouyou quips, a challenge rising in his voice. You shoot Shouyou a look, but he's staring determinedly at Tobio, and you're pleasantly surprised to see his gaze matched by the prince.

"It's high time I stepped up and began taking care of my people again," Tobio says firmly, a conviction ringing in his voice that has you smiling softly, reaching to brush a stray hair out of his face. Tobio can't help but soften at the action, taking your hand in his to smooth his thumb over your knuckles and brush against the engagement ring that Shouyou had given you all those nights ago. 

Learning that he'd been keeping it with him, that he'd had the ring on a chain around his neck since the day he first proposed to you… well, you'd been thankful for the bedroom you'd been given that night - for the silk sheets and plush pillows and the privacy of the sprawling corridors outside. 

As Tobio thumbs over your ring, you feel your face heat at the memory of that night, and as you shift in your seat and Shouyou send you a beaming smile, you know that he's smugly aware of what you're thinking of.

"Well," Shouyou says happily. "You may need some help, you know, coming back to your people and learning how to be what they need."

"And you might need some companionship," you chime in. "What, with this big, lonely castle and all." Tobio leans back in his chair and crosses his arms, trying desperately to maintain the stern look on his face - but a blush dusts itself over his cheekbones and a smile twitches on the corner of his lips.

"And what of your beloved tavern?" He asks you.

"There is more to me that is beloved besides the tavern," you say easily, glancing between the two of them. "And besides, Yamaguchi's been doing well enough on his own. He can take care of it while I'm away, and if the forest paths are finally looked after and kept safe, then the journey back and forth isn't so bad. Maybe it's… maybe it's time to move forward in this life a bit, hm?" Tobio sighs at that, letting his shoulders drop as his smile finally breaks through as he thinks of taking a step forward, of being alive once more. Shouyou whistles happily at the sight, leaning back in his chair and grinning.

"You two are getting married, or haven't you forgotten?" Tobio snipes, but there's mirth in his voice as he arches a brow.

"Well," you drawl. "A castle is such a beautiful place to hold a wedding."

"And what a perfect start," Shouyou chimes in. "There's no better way to gain back the people's love than by hosting an event like that. Open your home up to them, let them in."

"Well, sure," Tobio sighs, tipping his head back to look at the arched ceilings, the golden morning light shining in and illuminating the family crest hung on the dining room wall. "After all… this is a home now, isn't it?"

The wedding, of course, is as grand and extravagant as you could've imagined. Tobio'd fixed up the castle for the event, his sister having sent staff to make sure that everything was repaired and polished and restored to its former glory. Tobio was pleased by it, in his own way, tight-lipped and subtle and small about the whole thing. You and Shouyou would never comment on it, would never bring attention to it, but there is a life in Tobio now that wasn't there before - a colour in his cheeks and a shining light to his eyes.

But true to himself, even as he stood at the altar and officiated the wedding, he remained stoic and upright while you and Shouyou held hands and kissed, teary-eyed and trembling. It wasn't until that evening, late into the night when all of the guests had gone home, that the mask began to crack.

It's a privilege, you think as you lay in the master bedroom, to get to see Tobio like this - soft and smiling and laughing once he's really relaxed. By the end of the night, the silk sheets send cool chills across your exposed skin as you lay between your two lovers, Shouyou's hand intertwined with yours so that he can see your ring next to his, shining in the dim, golden light of the fireplace. In turn, you twist the fingers of your other hand through Tobio's matching ring - the one that you'd slipped on quietly during the festivities while the three of you snuck off somewhere private.

There had been chatter at the wedding, of course, about the prince's sudden appearance and the light that begun to fill up the corners of the valley. Even the forest, people whispered, had thinned, ground solidifying into safely travelled paths and creeping vines receding. The air had shifted, the clouds had dispersed, and the sun had risen in its endless way to shine light down to patches of the land that had not felt that warmth in years. It's like time, people began to say, is finally moving in the proper way, and life has been breathed back into the valley.

There's a sort of haze that fills the air surrounding the three of you, a comfortable safety that blankets you as you're tucked between the two of them, skin pressed against skin in the privacy of your home. You giggle at the thought, placing a kiss on Tobio's exposed chest where your face is pressed against him.

"What are you thinking of, my beloved?" Shouyou asks quietly, his voice a hushed whisper in the quiet room. 

"Just that it's nice to be home," you whisper back, your words making Tobio hum in agreement and tighten his arm around your waist.

"It is nice, isn't it?" He says lowly. "To be somewhere… to have someone's that's home."

[ashipiko]

ASHI - BIRTHDAY JACKET VIGNETTE 🌺

(PART 1 - 2.7)

ASHI: Hmhm~ A bday Interview, huh? It looked super funsies when everyone else did it, so I’m hyped!

ASHI: I’m guessing since we’re in the Pomedorms… A Pom? But who, exactly…

ASHI: (Ahaha, as nice as Rook and Vil are, I might end up feeling the pressure a little. It’d be an honor, obvs, but #stressful…!)

ASHI: (O Magical Birthday Dice, please have mercy…!)

???: Oi, Ashi!

EPEL: Happy Birthday! You weren’t expecting me, were you?

ASHI: Waugh?! Eppy! Hahaha, what a pleasant surprise!

ASHI: I’m so stoked you’re my interviewer! Who knew I’d get so lucky?

EPEL: No need to flatter me, you know. Thank you for having me.

ASHI: Pssh, why’re you acting so uptight, Eppy? It’s just me! I like your lingo and stuff.

EPEL: I’d love to, but… We’re still in the Pomefiore dorms, you know. I never know if Vil is lurking around or not…

ASHI: Ahh, fair point. Bummer. Maybe next time!

EPEL: Ehe, maybe. Anyway, here’s my birthday present to you. I hope you enjoy.

ASHI: Only one way to find out!

ASHI: Whoa… This is so cute?! And so fluffy…! I needed something to keep me warm at Ramshackle!

ASHI: There’s even little fox ears on it! And it’s my favorite color! Eppy…!

EPEL: I told my Granny about your birthday coming up, and since she enjoyed your company so much during Harveston…

EPEL: She asked for some things that you like and stirred this up. If anything, you should be giving the thanks to her.

ASHI: I thank the entire Felmier fam! It’s so cute, I’m gonna cry…! I’m about to wear this right now!

EPEL: You’re a summer baby, Ashi! Watch out for the heat…

EPEL: And I still have a new stock of apple cider coming in too, from my family’s farm. Your presents don’t just end there, heh.

ASHI: More?! I still haven’t finished the last one you gave me…

ASHI: No sweat! We’ll just plan another hangout at Ramshackle and chug ‘em all down together~.

EPEL: Unless Ace gets jealous and barges in again. That darn simp can’t get enough of ya.

ASHI: Hehe. Maybe I should make a no-Ace sign for next time, to put on Ramshackle’s dorm. Thoughts?

EPEL: I’ll help ya make it!

EPEL: O-Oh right, the interview. Maybe it was a little bit of a mistake pairing us up together, we keep on chatting…

ASHI: Nono! This is a Eppy W, DW!

EPEL: If you say so. First question…

EPEL: If you could take any person with you to a deserted island, who would it be? I’m pretty sure you wouldn’t take one of the ghosts or Grim, but it can’t be someone from your dorm.

ASHI: Grimmy’s great! But for survival… Ehh…

ASHI: NGL, a deserted island sounds kinda scaries, as much as I love the beach. Like yeah, I’d love to hang, but survival? Hecks naw!

EPEL: Sounds about right. You’re really like a princess.

ASHI: Mhm! If I really wanted to, I could probably get to the basics by myself if I tried. But do I wanna? No.

ASHI: It’d probably be a good idea to get paired with someone who knows what they’re doing, y’know? At the very least, I can depend on them!

EPEL: So someone who can take care of you? Leona, maybe? Since he already babies you… Alternatively, I don’t really think Ace would be the best choice, no offense.

ASHI: None taken. He deserves it. But nope! This is a fun scenario, right? I might as well go out with a bang, or someone I can have fun with.

ASHI: So, I say Floyd!

EPEL: Floyd?!

ASHI: Aye aye, cap’n! You get it, don’tcha? He’s so tall and could get all the coconuts! I think we’d have a lot of fun, too.

EPEL: I know you work at Monstro Lounge, but aren’t you scared of him still? He’s a little unpredictable, so he clashes with you.

ASHI: Well, that’s what makes him fun, right? I guess it’s all depending on his mood…

ASHI: One time we accidentally totally crashed Monstro Lounge ‘cause he freaked me out, hehe. It’s a little scary when you’re doing a closing shift and all you hear is a tiny “shriiiimpy~” in the distance.

ASHI: My fear of the dark TOTALLY kicked in then. I never screamed so loud in my entire life!

EPEL: I can imagine… Sharp teeth, glowy eyes and all.

ASHI: I tried getting back at him once too, when I blended some shiitake mushrooms into his milkshake.

ASHI: …I don’t think I’ve ever even ran that fast before, TBH.

EPEL: Ashi, this isn’t really helping your case, if I’m being honest… You’re making it sound like he’d eat you by the time someone saved you two.

ASHI: W-Well! On the other hand, he’s got that eel form that we can rely on too! If we get bored, we can just zoom on out and crash Azul’s place or something, y’know?

EPEL: I guess I see your point. Being a merman must means he could help a lot on an island…

ASHI: Yup, yup! Anyway, I think we’re good enough buds where I’m 97% sure he wouldn’t eat me!~

EPEL: Heh, classic Ashi. I guess in a way you really did think it through, even if it sounded odd at first.

ASHI: Of coursies! ♪

EPEL: Okay, about time for our next question.

EPEL: If you were to transfer to a different dorm, which would you pick?

ASHI: Oh, a good one! I think I’ve kinda cheated with my Ramshackle prefect rights, hehe. I’m a little bit of a dorm-hopper.

ASHI: But a permanently different dorm…~ I think about it sometimes.

EPEL: Really? Which dorms?

EPEL: I think I could see you fitting in Heartslabyul, since you’re pretty good at sticking to the rules. Riddle likes you a lot too, more than he likes Ace, at least.

ASHI: Oho? Tell me more, Eppy!

EPEL: Um… I think Scarabia could fit you too. You and Kalim are sort of one and the same, don’t you see it?

ASHI: I see whatchu mean!

EPEL: Yeah. I couldn’t ever see you in anything like Savanaclaw, Ignihyde, or Diasomnia, though.

EPEL: You don’t really have an athletic, competitive, or magic drive… Ignihyde is a whole can of worms.

EPEL: I don’t think you could stand a day in that dorm, with the dark, creepy skeletons everywhere.

ASHI: Waugh… Don’t remind me, Eppy!

EPEL: Not to mention, the housewarden. As soon as you see him in person, I think the Headmaster would have to get called over for medical issues—

ASHI: Hey hey! No need to out me like that…!

EPEL: Heh, sorry Ashi. Was I right, at least?

ASHI: Hmm… yeah! Not right on the nose, though.

ASHI: I think that if I were to be in a dorm… I’d pick Pomefiore.

EPEL: I didn’t really consider it, but I could see it now that you say it. The uniform would fit you, I think.

ASHI: Yeah! And we’d get to be twinsies!

ASHI: Ashi-Eppy, the Birthday swapped duo! 5/6 and 6/5! ☆

EPEL: Heheh. You’d definitely be a shine of sunlight in here. It would be fun to hang out with you at Pomefiore.

EPEL: But you don’t use makeup, don’t you? That’d be a sure-fire way to stand out.

ASHI: Yeah, that’s be the only downside…

ASHI: And the food, right?! It looks so… appetizer-core. Defo not up my alley, I couldn’t imagine…

ASHI: But Vil and Rook are cool! At least at Pomefiore, I know there’s people that can help accommodate me and make sure I’m happy and healthy!

ASHI: Maybe instead of a potato, I can became a French fry… Sounds kinda banger, don’t you think?

EPEL: You make a funny argument.

ASHI: Life at Ramshackle can get kinda stressful, you know! I love the ghosts and all, but it’s scary sometimes…

ASHI: Grimmy thinks it’s funny to prank me, and he’ll just graze over my legs as I’m sleeping, and it’s so freaky!

ASHI: Dunno, man… It’d be nice to see him get some karma and have to keep it all up-tight at Pomefiore.

ASHI: But I guess at the end of the day, the thing that I’m missing at my dorm is the constant hustle and bustle.

EPEL: People would kill for that, you know.

ASHI: Also true~.

ASHI: Well, there’s no silence you can’t fix with a simple hangout! I can always count on you to make Ramshackle a little more lively, right Eppy?

EPEL: That’s right! The Ashi— Eh… Eppy duo can reign at Ramshackle!

ASHI: Darn right, hahaha!

-

ASHI: D’aww, is it already the end of the interview…?

EPEL: Yep. It’s ‘round time for yer good-luck gift!

ASHI: Wow, hometown-Eppy makes a comeback?! That doesn’t sound good for me at all—!

EPEL: Trust me, yer gonna wanna brace yerself. ‘Cause I ain’t goin’ easy on ya, even if you are a girl!

ASHI: Oh boy… Guess I shouldn’t hold back either, huh?

ASHI: …Pfft! KK, bring it on!~

EPEL: Prepare yerself!

EPEL: Happy Birthday, Ashi!

-

CARD: UNLOCKED!

GROOVY: UNLOCKED!

[sockatoothewafflebird]

(monika is sitting in the music room, at the piano, and her and the player are having a friendly chat. it started out as just a little check-in, but now they're talking about... other things.)

player: haha now that i think about it, running the game and keeping you guys alive while also coding things to make the world liveable for you is kind of like playing the sims. only difference is that you're all sentient and have common sense most of the time.

monika, laughing: ???? what the hell ARE we to you?!?

player: i do actually care about all of you, i promise! but a good part of the reason i don't consider just deleting the game entirely (i mean the energy bills are crazy) is because im literally watching the best yuri anime EVER play out in front of me in real time. and i get to be friends with the characters! like how cool is that??

monika: what. elaborate please.

player, ignoring her: honestly if i had to describe it, it'd be a mix of slice-of-life, and... emotional turmoil... what genre would that even be called? existential horror? but that's TOO heavy of a term for it... oh, and definitely romance. lots of romance.

monika: oh shut the fuck up i am NOT romantic with sayori

player, paying very close attention now: girl i never said anything about sayori.... you downbad frfr

(sayori walks into the room looking extremely depressed, and flops right in monika's lap like a tired baby. she hugs monika like she's a big stuffed animal and sighs. of course, monika hugs her back, because what friend wouldn't?)

sayori: huurgh... i need a nap...

player: aaand my point is proven. have a good make-out session guys im gonna go get doritos

(the player poofs out of existence, and monika adds "put a harmless but annoying virus in their computer" to her mental to-do list.)

...

sayori, hopeful: ...wwwhat was that about making out?

monika, gay panicking: um uhhh.. n-nothing ahaha it's fine, go ahead and take your nap!

[goldenpinof]

curious about your perspective – what do you think is the primary reason for the current comeback, and for the large scale of it (daily videos, new heavily marketed merch, etc)? are they trying to make up some monetary loss? is it true revitalized passion? the influence of the new management? lead-up to a major project/announcement? i'm guessing there's an element of at least the first three, but interested in your opinion as a noted non-cynical cynic (compliment btw)

under the cut because that's a lot. and it's not even all of my thoughts, unfortunately.

no one is gonna read it. but if you are, i'm sorry in advance.

ahaha. about merch. did you notice how they just continue to promote the calendar and the catboy sweater even though the initial release and promo had a deadline aka till December 1st? this is a fishy marketing right there. and i would love to know: why they did what they did (i'd assume they printed more calendars than people ordered by Dec 1st, but that's not our problem as customers. we shouldn't have been put into a framework in the 1st place if there was a chance for this shit to go south. this theory goes against the "pre-order" with a start of shipping in 2-3 weeks); why their managers allowed it (from a legal perspective); and why dnp didn't say anything. anyways.

i do think that Dan is trying to compensate for wad losses. and i know that he was "joking" about not making money or making negative money on tour. but i saw ticket sales a day before each show (only public information, not the inside official data from venues), it's still on my blog. and the sales didn't look good. so, how much of it was a joke? and compensating by making content that we and they enjoy isn't a bad thing, btw! i also think that he feels guilty for leaving us and the dnp brand behind for so long without actually giving us anything in return. thus so many comments on this 5-year hiatus and potential future ones. blame youtube originals, i know. not really his fault, but his choice of (the lack of) communication is his fault. and again, i always come back to wad. something fucking clicked in his head when he saw not as many people as he hoped for (or expected), how dedicated were some of those who still supported him during wad, and also he realised that without stronger managers he was not gonna make it solo. and he dragged Phil along because they do everything together and only then it works the best, and also dnpg's return in full force needed new energy for the amount of sponsorships they decided to do (i think, it's mainly Phil's pushing, because he is pro-sponsorships, they just need to be more careful with it on dnpg because Dan (hopefully) has principles when it comes to this. which is amazing. you go, girl!)

i'm very suspicious of dnp's new management right now. so idk. i think, again, most of it comes from Phil, because Phil thrives on their gaming channel, and that's basically the only easy way to survive on youtube and make money right now (for him). i'm glad dnp separated dnpg from their solo careers at least on the management and content levels. it gives Phil the room to use dnpg as a brand to pitch and fund his ideas/projects if it's ever needed. and now, after we survived the hiatus, they can pause dnpg for a couple of months to focus on their solo projects without losing the majority of the audience because technically we would know the reason and also we grew a thicker skin.

i do think that Dan is using dnpg to later help himself with a stand-up special or tour or some sort of series (danisnotokay). i also think he will use it to promote wad dvd (which is good. i will be disappointed if he doesn't use dnpg. like, bitch, why are we even here then? those who went through wad with him, i mean). i wonder if Inter Talent (i'm separating their name intentionally at his point because they piss me off) was smart enough to announce Dan and Phil's signings 2 weeks after UTA announced Dan to just make us pay attention to Dan's solo career again. as a hint of something coming our way. you know what i mean? i wonder if it was intentional. like UTA made a huge announcement, Dan retweeted it and posted it on instagram stories. it was a big deal. meanwhile, dnpg began thriving again and our eyes were on Dan anyway, so of course we noticed that solo career was on the maps again. Inter Talent was basically silent as another representative of Dan (and Phil), despite having them on the website for at least a month. and now 2 weeks after UTA's announcement (which was on November 22, 2023) Inter Talent was like, "hello? do you remember we signed Dan? and also Phil, and their joint channel?" Dan said wad dvd is almost cooked. wouldn't it be genius to stir our interest up step by step? (a part of me still thinks that Inter Talent's social media managers are just slow as fuck though. also they don't even care to check facts about their clients. UTA didn't fuck the announcement up like that, btw. and i doubt Inter Talent realises how nosy dnp's audience is, and that we are very likely gonna notice and spread even this stupid announcement. maybe they are dumb and it's me who is a fucking genius planning steps to present wad dvd to the masses, ugh. when will Dan pay me, like for real.)

i'm surprised you don't think it's heavily connected to new projects. i would bet my kidney it does. Dan will fuck off the moment he needs to focus on danisnotokay or someone offers to sponsor another tour (which, please, someone do. i need to see him for professional reasons). the question is, fuck off for how long and if it's gonna be communicated thoroughly or not. i'm not saying he will leave for 6 months without giving us something in return to balance things out. no, no, no. i don't think he would dare. but 3-4 weeks, maybe 2 months? sure.

is it true revitalized passion? well. *nervous laughter* i'm gonna defend Phil like i'm a phillie, even tho i'm not. he wanted it just as much as we did. so i believe it's a true revitalized passion at least on his part. i hope he fights for it if it's necessary, i hope he asks us for help if needed. i hope he threatens Dan with an actual divorce and forever home if needed. like, bitch, if there's a chance to keep dnpg alive without Dan actually losing his will to live, we should use that chance. Dan's stubbornness and delulus are not the reason to kill the most fun and profitable thing they ever created aka dnp brand. let it exist, even if alongside solo projects, even if it's 2-3 videos a month. damn, even 1 video (i don't mean during pauses made specifically for the peaks of solo projects). i do think Dan enjoys the attention, money, and possibilities their returned audience can give him. he also enjoys working with Phil. he certainly does not enjoy promoting their videos. and he is lucky he has Phil for that. is it a true passion for the gaming channel and joint branding solemnly? i genuinely don't think so. now, this dnp brand puts Dan into a framework, unfortunately. and i understand his desire to grow as a "strong independent Dan", and i wish him the best. i will root for him no matter how much of a floppy-ding-dong it can potentially be. i want him to fulfill his dreams and have a team that will fight for his interests. and i hope to god, UTA and Inter Talent are the ones. don't fucking tempt me with your unprofessionalism. but do i think Dan's head and heart belong to dnpg or dnp brand? no. i'm happy that he is at least trying. a part of me doesn't even care about the reason. i'm curious, but in hindsight, it wouldn't matter or change anything.

other thoughts, because apparently i decided to vomit on a keyboard tonight:

i'm glad dnp took back a bit of control over the editing on dnpg. i hope they will try to edit more themselves when gamingmas is over. or they will teach their editors better. because man, we need to slow down with these cuts.

i do think that dnp brand will expand, and dnpg and merch aren't the only things we should expect. (twitch, podcast or liveshows, onlyfans or its equivalent, vlogging series not limited by ditl, and other things that i forgot). reaction videos are already a thing and it's very funny because it's what youtube wants, so Dan must feel amazing right now falling for it :)) it's good thought because it's fun and torture for all parties involved.

i think by these reaction videos they are trying to rewrite their internet history a little bit for those who are new. it's not gonna work with us but at least dnp can control the narrative in new people's heads (i wonder for how long though).

with new people, the phandom will become more generic and dnp will love that. it can actually help Dan with new projects i think. Phil as well, but we don't know shit about it right now.

i wonder if Dan returns to working with charities.

if they involve more phannies, not only artists, it's gonna be interesting.

in case i'm wrong, don't step on my neck, i don't know anything for a fact. half of it is alleged, the other half is wishful thinking <3

[bubbleecloud]

Special delivery!

WELCOME HOME TK FIC LETS GOOOOO

~Wally lends a helping hand to Eddie as he prepares his mail for delivery. But a small discovery makes Eddie a little sidetracked~

Lee!Wally Ler!Eddie

“Well, I really can’t thank ya enough for stoppin’ by to help me out, Wally! It sure  woulda been real messy if I’d had to sort through this mail all by m’self!”

Wally looked up from where he’d been placing a brightly colored stamp onto a large pink envelope. He smiled brightly at Eddie as he placed a the envelope in a pile with the others.

“It’s my pleasure! A neighbor is always happy to help another!” He said, his voice calm and airy as usual. It was true, too, Wally was more than happy to lend his friend a helping hand. In truth, he had only dropped in to ask if Eddie had any paper he could spare, but upon seeing how much work the poor mailman was practically smothered in, he opted to stick around. Eddie chuckled warmly at Wally’s response. He gave the shorter puppet a clap on the back as he opened a side closet to look for packaging tape. They worked side by side in silence for a stretch, content enough to just enjoy each others company.    Eddie huffed as he picked up another bulky package. As he set it on a scale to weigh it, an irritated huff sounded behind him that made him pause. He turned, and instantly had to choke back a chuckle. Standing up on his tip toes, Wally was trying to reach another stack of envelopes that were stored on a high shelf. He huffed and stomped his foot on the floor. Cute.

"Heh. Need some help there, bud'?" Eddie asked, walking over to stand next to the short painter. Wally looked up at him, his face adorably pouty. He nodded. "That would be very helpful..." He mumbled. Eddie shook his head and chuckled endearingly.

"Alrighty, c'mere, you!" The mailman said, and just out on instinct he reached put to grip Wally's sides in order to lift him up. But before he had even barely had a chance to get him off the ground, Wally made a strange sort of gasp and jolted away. He wrapped his hands around his midriff, his cheeks now cherry red. Eddie raised an eyebrow. "You could've- ah- you can just hand them to me..!" Wally said, trying to sound casual.

Eddie didn't say anything,instead reaching for the envelopes. But when Wally went to grab them, he jerked them out of reach.

"Hey-!"

"What was that noise ya' made, Walls?"

Wally blinked. He slowly looked up at Eddie. The smile on his face made his breath catch in his throat. He crossed his arms, trying his best to look unbothered. "It was nothing. You just caught me off guard. I startle very easily. Now- please give me the letters?" He asked, hoping Eddie would just drop it. But he just shook his head, taking a step towards Wally.

"No can do, Walls. See, I thinks your fibbin'! Cuz that sure didn't sound like nothin.." He said, crossing his arms. He reached out a finger and poked the smaller puppet in the side. "You ticklish or somethin?"

The way Wally squeaked and jumped away was enough of an answer for Eddie. The grin he wore turned into a full on smile. He reached out to start rapid firing pokes all over the poor painters torso. "You are! Well, that's just adorable, ain't it! Why ain't ya ever tell me?!"

Wally let a couple of wheezy giggles slip, pushing at Eddies hand in protest. "Noho! Ahaha-! Eddie! We have to get back to wohohork!" He squealed, squirming as best as he could to try to get away. But Eddie just slipped one of his arms around his waist to keep him in place,now turning his pokes into light pinches at the base of his ribcage. (Or where his ribcage would be, anyway) He laughed a little and shook his head.

"I says we still got plenty of time! B'sides, your laugh is just too cute! I gotta hear more!" He said, his voice so sweet and genuine it make wallys breath catch. He shook his head frantically, his giggles increasing and the tickles got more intense.

"No! Ahahahah! Haha! I'm much to sensitive for this-EHEHEDDIE! Plehehease!"

He said, his words rushed and frantic as he brought his hands up to fan his face, his mouth open wide in his fits of giggles. Eddie hummed and leaned down to nuzzle his nose against Wallys cheek, giggling at the flustered whine it pulled from him. "Aw, no ya ain't! I think your just being dramatic so I'll stop, aren'tcha?" He coo'd, letting his hands flutter downwards to squeeze Wallys hip bones.

Lets just say Wally let out a scream high enough to rival that of Sallys vocal range.

"EEE- AHAH-! EHAHAHHAH- No-No!! Wait, waIT PLEHEASE-! I'MNOTBEINGDRAMATICTHATREALLYTICKLES!"

He said, little hiccups and gasps breaking through his laughter now as he threw his head back. His Knees buckled, and Eddie had to hurry to keep his grip stable so he didn't drop the poor puppet. Eddie let out a surprised chuckled at Wallys desperate exclamation. "I can tell!"

Wally whined again, his body gone completely limp as he laughed his poor little head off. Eddie let his attack continue for a little longer before he did eventually let up, easing Wally up right again, keeping his arms around him while he recovered. "You ok, giggles?"

Wally chuckled a little and looked up at Eddie, wiping a tear from the corner of his eye. "Yes, I'm fine. But, oh, that was mehean!" He said cupping one of his own cheeks and looking away. Eddie chuckled and let Wally go from his hug. "Aw, ya know you enjoyed it!" Then, he retrieved the letters and held them out to Wally. "Now, I believe you was lookin for these?" He said, wiggling them in front of Wally playfully. He snatched them out of his hand, although there was still a big smile on his face.

"Yes,thank you very much! And now that you've gotten all the sillyness out of you, I shall go back to getting them ready, if you wouldn't mind"

He said fixing Eddie with a light hearted glare as he walked back over to the counter. Eddie laughed brightly.

"You feel more than welcome! There's no one better for the job, I suppose!"

And there wasn't, of course.

~-----------------------~

THE SILLY PUPPETS!!! GRRRRRRRR!!!!

I hope y'all enjoyed! This way so fun to write!

[hilsonamore]

THOUGHTS ON S4 EP12, HOUSE M.D (pt.2)

“Don’t Ever Change”

So here’s part 2 because i haven’t said half of whatever the fuck is going on in my head rn-

BABE STOP LOOKING AT THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE WITH THOSE EYES AND JUST MAKE OUT ALREADY-

“You like that!”

“It’s annoying but she’s good at it”

“Wait a second- this isn’t just about the sex. You like her personality. You like that she’s conniving. You like that she has no regard for consequence. You like that she can humiliate someone if it serves-“

Intense puppy brown eye stare

realisation

“Oh my god…you’re sleeping with me”

realises

holy actual SHIT

HOLD MY DAMN DRINK IM GOING INTO GAY PANIC MODE

LIKE- Do i even have to elaborate further on that? The fact that house is listing all these undesirable, questionable, anti-wilson qualities that characterise Amber, and then realises that… wait a damn second. THAT’S ME. And he realises that not only does wilson like that, he’s also attracted to that. He realises that his best friend has found someone who makes him happy, whose unconventional qualities aren’t regarded as off-putting and grotesque, and that that person just so happens to be a female version of himself. Like, no wonder my boy looks so flabbergasted.

“It’s annoying but she’s good at it”, is basically wilson’s way of telling house that, however annoying and mind-boggling and irritating he might be, he still likes him, he’s still there for him, he still acknowledges, despite all his unorthodox qualities, his brilliance and his goodness (which is basically the entire dynamic of their relationship), i-

And may i note, if this was just some “hahha you’re sleeping with the female version of me mate hahaha are you in love with me or something” house would NOT be so fucking awkward and DESPERATE to get away. Like, are y’all seeing what i’m seeing? My guy doesn’t do awkward. And yet-

Honestly, bisexuality was born in this scene and no one can convince me otherwise.

Next up!

This very normal conversation between two totally hetero boy-besties😔

“House you’re right. Why not? Why not date you? It’s brilliant. We’ve known each other for years, we’ve put up with all kinds of crap from each other and we keep coming back. We’re a couple!”

“Are we still speaking metaphorically?”

“Amber is exactly what i need, and you would agree if you weren’t mired in self-loathing, topped with a thin crust of megalomania”

“Hey, that’s my best friend’s girl you’re talking about”

Okay but like… WHAT

First of all, wilson babe, house didn’t ever tell you “oh hey babe since you’re sleeping with the female version of me then you should just date the og version of me instead haha” in order for you to make that very-serious-joke, he just stated that “you’re sleeping with me”. So what’s your excuse? What’s your excuse for saying that out of nowhere other than in the hopes that amidst the jokey manner of your banter house would grasp on the opportunity, suggest you go find a closet (ha!) to make out in or just out-right tell everyone you’re together and because you’re both so stubborn neither would ever back down from this intense game of gay chicken- literally whyyyyyy?!?!?

My boy’s face doesn’t even have one ounce of “i’m just messing with you ahaha or am i!?!” he’s just like “yep, this was my plan all along, to date someone who’s a copy-paste of you to make you finally realise how intensely in love with each other we both are, you jealous lil shit-”.

Like, what in the gay old man yaoi shit is going on here?

And then, then there is this beautifully brilliant thing that wilson says that i haven’t actually seen anyone talk about and it’s driving me crazy.

“Amber is exactly what i need, and you would agree if you weren’t mired in self loathing, topped with a thin crust of megalomania”

Okay so um, we’ve already established that Amber is the female version of House. Like, their gender is the only thing that sets them apart, because otherwise they are the literal same person and they can both see that. And then this little shit of a puppy-brown-eyed-sexually-frustrated-closeted-little-shit of a doctor tells his best friend that his girlfriend, aka his alter ego, is exactly what he needs. He doesn’t just want her for sex, he wants her for her and everything that she is. Which is house with a different body type. He’s so unserious like what-

“And you would realise that if you weren’t mired in self-loathing, topped with a thin crust of megalomania”

What does his self-loathing have to do with anything? Ohhhh yeah, i get it, house’s self-loathing is preventing him from seeing that he is exactly what wilson needs in his life, right? Like, this is the literal translation of this statement, metaphorically or not. Otherwise, somebody come correct my language skills.

“She’s not me. Well, she is me. But that’s not why she’s attractive. She’s a needy version of me”

“Hard to imagine such a mythical creature”

aka you’re needy and i desire you carnally

…

“She wasn’t needy, she was.. in a bad situation. There’s a difference”

“Not to your libido”

aka either way you just want to sleep with me

…

Intense hungry, blue-eyed stare

“Well, if you’d looked at me with those eyes before i was involved…c’est la vie”

aka come here you lil-

…

Gay smile

im tired what the fuck more do i have to say-

i’ll probably make a part 3 but later on because i just spent 3 hours making these😔

[freisende]

Memories Selection: Checkmate Episode 5 - 孤独な玉座 (The Lonely Throne) English Translation - Ensemble Stars

Provided by Happy Elements, あんスタチャンネル on Youtube

Ensemble Stars Memories Selection: Checkmate 『チェックメイト』 Adapted from Ensemble Stars! Story: Checkmate Written by: 日日日 (Akira) English Translation: Freiya

*All copyrights of the stories, scene pictures and writings, all belong to Happy Elements. I only translated the scenes into English to help overseas fans understand the dialogues. I do not own any copyrights other than the English Translation*

——————————————

Izumi: You’re late, Leo-kun!

Izumi: It's basic to be on time, right? Don’t you lack the sense of being the leader?

Leo: Ahaha~! Sorry, sorry. You know… in truth, just now I was negotiating a bit with the unit we’re supposed to be facing off.

Eichi: Negotiate…?

Izumi: *Izumi takes a walk forward* …Now that I think about it, not even one of them has shown up yet, have they? Well, they don’t even have the will to do their activities from the start. So I thought they don’t intend to participate in the rehearsal, and will just go straight directly in the real live, though?

Leo: Hm. They’re really like that, huh? Recently, I have finally understood. Everyone, all of them, I thought they’re my lovely friends. But I wonder what they think? I was thinking; do they also think of me as a precious being, like Sena do? I was very curious about this as of late. That’s why the other day, I had Mama[1] help me negotiate, and I directly faced the former member of Chess regarding this one-on-one. I’m also a boy, so I’m worthless if I am always just being protected by Sena, right? 

Izumi: *Izumi puts a confused expression while looking at Madara*

…What do you mean?

Madara: Hmm… let’s hear it directly from Leo himself, okay?

Izumi: …

*Everyone is silent and hear Leo’s explanation deeply*

Leo: …I went all around and asked everyone. I asked them, “What do you think of me? What am I to you?” They gave me various answers. But there is not much meaning in words. “A friend. A comrade, I love you”, you can say anything with your mouth, right? 

That’s why I narrowed it to choices. 

Izumi: …Choices?

Leo: Yup. Me, or the songs I composed. I made them choose. If they like me, regard me as a friend, and still want to be friends with me, I won’t let them use my songs anymore. But if they choose to be my enemies, I will let them use my songs just like always up to now. When I presented them with those choices, Sena, what do you think happened there? 

Leo: Everyone, without any hint of hesitation, with smiling expression on their faces, they directly choose to be my enemies! Ahahahahahaha! Laughable, right, Sena? What they love isn’t me, but my songs! Well, that’s obvious though, because I’m a genius! The songs I made are great masterpieces! Ahahahaha, ahahaha! Hey, Sena, Tenshi, it was steeped in my mind that I was loved. I thought I had spent my youth well happily with these friendful comrades.

Leo: But, it was just me being mistaken by myself! Ahahahahaha, ahahahahahaha, ahahahaha, ahaha! 

Izumi: Leo-kun, well…!

Leo: No, wait a moment, Sena! Hear me out! *Leo holds out his hand to Izumi* Starting this point is the climax masterpiece! I said just now that I was negotiating, right? I don’t want them to ruin and make a mess of the live that Sena and everyone else has been preparing well for, so I thought it would be best for them to just back off if they don’t want to do it!

***

–Flashback to the scene of Leo negotiating before–

Chess’ former member A: Don’t stand on today’s checkmate stage?

Leo: Yup. You would still get the pay. Not a bad deal, right?

Chess’ former member B: Okay~! I’ll ride that big negotiation deal.

Leo: …I see…

Chess’ former member C: Yeah. Even if we face off, we can’t win against you guys.

Chess’ former member D: If we don’t need to stand on stage but still get paid, that way definitely would be better for us too.

Chess’ former members: Ahahahahahaha. 

Leo: …In truth, I was hoping that they would reject this negotiation. I wanted to explode, “Don’t be ridiculous!”, I wanted to beat and mess them up!

…Hey. what’s up with those guys? Are they really idols? For what purpose do they live? Isn’t it to do their best in things they like in their life?

Izumi: Leo-kun… *Izumi reaches out for Leo’s shoulders*

Leo: …Sena, this is your fault, you know!

Izumi: …Huh?

Leo: You’re the first person I met in this school. You’re the guy that I got close to and you always do your best. That’s why I thought everyone else was like that too…! Idols are amazing, and if it’s here I can definitely make friends. It made me believe that it would be like that, I was made to believe that things were like that. That’s why! Everything, all of it is your fault, Sena!

Izumi: …Why…*Izumi backs off* …Why is it my fault, Leo-kun…?

Madara: …. *Madara looks quietly at them*

***

–Madara calls Izumi out to the archery club’s practice field to talk–

Izumi: …Mikejima, what is it that you need to talk about? It’s about time for the stage to start, I need to do my makeup, change my clothes… I’m busy, though.

Madara: Hm. I thought that you needed to know, see. So I thought of telling you quietly, you know?

Izumi: …Haa? 

Madara: On that day, I was passing by this archery club’s practice field. And I heard the voice of a cat crying inside, as if asking for help. I entered here, and I witnessed that appearance of Leo-san. 

*Little John meows*

Leo: Hm~♪ Hm~♪ Hm~♪ Hm~♪ *Leo sings a melody*

Madara: …! *Madara was surprised and hurried to rush inside, but stop in the middle of the way, while gritting his teeth*

With the flowing blood from his broken right hand as a writing tool, Leo-san was writing music scores, and composing a song with his blood. While crying, he was saying this:

Leo: I’m happy…! This is the first time I’m feeling such pain! What a fortunate moment, ahahaha! Ah, it’s flowing, it’s flowing here…! Inspiration! Ahahahaha…!

Madara: I rushed to the infirmary to call for help, but when I came back, Leo-san was gone.

Izumi: I see. 

(So after that, he came to my place, in the practice room…)

Madara: I investigated, and finally I got it. This place has become a kind of hanging out place for delinquents and those bad guys with no ethic, you see?That day too, they played and did bad things to the cat that got lost here. It’s a very disgusting, bad story, though. They used lighters to burn it, used arrows to hurt it. That was how it came to Leo-san trying to stop them using his body. And the result of it, was like that. The delinquents got scared and they ran off, apparently. Then that’s how I found out. When I saw that appearance of Leo-san, I was too shocked. I thought, perhaps because of the unbearable pain, something has gone off in Leo-san’s head. But the truth, it was not like that.

Madara: Leo-san was trying his best desperately in telling himself: “It’s no one’s fault. This is not a tragedy. If else, I’m feeling happy. Using this experience, I can write out a great masterpiece!” That’s what he must have thought in his head.

Izumi: …That guy… Leo-kun is… an idiot with a good heart of a person, so something like hating other people– he can’t truly hate anyone from the bottom of his heart. And that’s why in Chess, he’s being used delightly by other people. 

Madara: Hm. If you have comprehended that much, then I would like for you to watch for Leo-san carefully, closely by his side. That child is fragile. I am trying my best as his friend, but I can’t always remain by his side to watch him. But you, you’re his comrade and his equivalent, aren’t you? So I’m begging you. Please don’t make that good child unhappy.

Izumi: …Even if you told me that…! I am just a fellow unit member… not his family, or even a friend. I’m busy with myself already and have other things to fulfil. I can’t take care of each and every one of his problems.

***

–Back in the auditorium, audiences have begun to gather to watch the stage–

Leo: Aah Sena~! Se~na, just where have you gone off to? The audiences have entered and gathered here, you know!

Arashi: Hey, hey, Izumi-chan. All the members of our opposing units have surrendered, right? Then, you don’t need extra helping members, right? *Arashi looks at Ritsu*

Ritsu: Um. *Ritsu nods his head at Arashi*

Izumi: *Izumi looks around*…Where are Tenshouin and Aoba?

Leo: They have gone back! I asked them to. I’m the leader, you see. I have that much of an authority, right?

Ritsu: Well, us too…

Arashi: Can go back home, right?

Leo: No! You guys should go sing. From what I’ve seen you guys are pretty good. I’m also curious and want to see how your singing voice sounds!

Arashi: Oh my…

Ritsu: …Eehh?

Leo: It’s time to take off! Let’s go, Sena! *Leo stands up and approaches Izumi* What should I do?

Izumi: …even if you tell me what…?

Leo: I’m stupid, so I can’t figure it out by myself. You’re smart, so you should think it out, and tell me what I should do. I will make your dream come true. 

Leo: As Knights, together with me.

——————————————

Translator’s notes:

[1] Leo calls Madara with his unique abbreviated name, “Mama” from MikejiMA MAdara.

Note: This episode made me sob so much omg it hurts, Leo-kun!😭

——————————————

!Warning! Please refrain from reposting the translation to other platforms; abide to link back to this post for reference. Thank you.

Memories Selection: Checkmate Directory Chapter Episode 4 - Rusting Heart Episode 6 - The Shine of the Crown

Translation Masterlist

[vaguely-concerned]

sophia's time in redcliffe is such an emotional roller coaster I feel so bad for her lol

morning: village is saved with minimal casualties. people look at her with admiration and gratitude rather than fear. several tricky political situations successfully navigated, irving would be so proud. really getting the hang of this saving the day thing! :) sounds like some drama up at the castle, almost makes a person happy to not have a traditional family, phew glad that's not my problem! the boy she likes professes his love for her in front of a stunning view over redcliffe castle in the most adorable and soul-affirming way, a moment that she'll look back to later in life when she's happy in herself and say 'that. that was what changed everything, that is my anchor in hope'. aw yeah everything is coming up sophia amell

by lunchtime: her fuckup little brother (who is older than her) is in a dungeon and has reached dizzying heights of fuckup even she had not believed him capable of. she finds the righteous anger she's been using to block out everything else she feels around him can't survive his sad tired eyes and now everything is Complicated. at BEST they're going to kill him oh fuck oh fuck. isolde feared her child being sent to the circle so much she did all of this instead. teagan has been so kind and courteous the whole time, and he 'can't imagine the boy as a mage, of all things'. ha. ahaha. get in bitch it's time to finally face all that childhood and systemic trauma you've been pretending doesn't even affect you that much this is going to suck

(you love the Circle. you love the Circle. you love the Circle. love isn't love if it doesn't bleed. right? right. (alistair gave her the rose so carefully, with such attention and intention, so the thorns wouldn't tear her open. the petals are soft against the pad of her thumb.) she doesn't let jowan out of the dungeons because she remembers what happened the last two times she took her eyes off him for five fucking minutes, and she didn't protect him then -- she'll do it now, this time she'll stand up for him, and that will fix it, surely. SURELY. we're bargaining staging this for all it's worth baby. her love is what dooms him to tranquility, ultimately. that she didn't let go of him, this time. and she'll live with knowing that for decades. augh)

she goes to her dad irving for help and he provides it with characteristic aplomb -- connor is freed, day saved yet again! (there's something so funny and like... immensely first year college student coded about the 'uh. this is a lot. let me call my dad real quick' vibes going on here lol) but irving won't meet her eyes whenever jowan's name is spoken and doesn't pick up on her tentative hinting, the way their conversations usually go, doesn't initiate a Clever Plot like she thought he might, and it all turns to ash in her mouth. she's just saved a family, and didn't even understand she herself had one until it went all to shit and she realized no one else would ever save it -- no one else would never even think to try. the templars would close the doors and burn the place down with her family still inside, and no one would stop them.

she looks at irving's impassive face which for once offers no guidance, with a child's grief and terror as they first understand that a parent's hands can't fix everything, that they're only human with human limitations too. all at once she understands that he let go of jowan in his heart completely the moment he found out the templars had conclusive proof against him -- that as first enchanter you would go mad if you grieved every child lost that way, you have to put up some kind of framework in your mind to rationalize it and make it bearable. (and how could she blame him -- she did the same thing, after all. she's just less practiced with sticking to it yet.)

it's the first time she feels deeply how she was not abandoned when irving sent her away from the circle, because she's seen what his abandonment looks like now. and how could you ever know how to feel about that? that your father loves you so deeply he wanted to free you, and arranged for the disposal of your brother like so much radioactive waste with his other hand? that they all live in a system where what might have happened if he didn't could have been so much worse?

she looks and looks at irving's profile and thinks could you have let go of me in your heart as easily, if I stepped wrong one time, if I were less brilliant, if I had worked less hard to be perfect? and he turns his face away from her and doesn't answer. maybe he sent her to the wardens so he'd never have to answer that question. maybe that was the best he could do. maybe one day she'll be allowed to forgive him for it.

[archiveikemen]

Liam Evans Home Screen Lines

This is a fan-made translation solely for entertainment purposes with no guaranteed perfection; expect mistakes, grammatical errors, and some creative liberties. All original content and media used belongs to Cybird. Please support the game by buying their stories and playing their games. Reblogs appreciated.

Read this before interacting

Last Updated: 14.08.2024

5★ Cards

Standard Gacha

"I like everyone, but... I don't know if everyone genuinely likes me. I don't know, I don't know, I don't know... Hey, do you like me?"

"... Still not enough, not enough at all. This isn't enough to satisfy my curiosity. ... Come on, fill me up with you even more... will you?"

Wedding Lily

"I promise to love you in sickness and in health, through the good times and the bad. ... Want to fall together with me?"

"The jet-black wedding dress suits your body well. ... You look so good, so gorgeous that I want to pin you down right now."

Birthday Diamond Set 5★ Card

"To be honest... I still can't proudly say that I think it's alright for me to be myself. But... I want to start loving myself a little bit at a time."

"Is this bouquet a birthday present for me? Hahaha! You can be so smooth at times. ... Thanks."

4★ Cards

Standard Gacha

Day Card: "Liam Evans. I'm a member of Crown and a stage actor by profession. I'll keep you captivated all day and night."

Night Card: "Keep your eyes closed for just 3 seconds. Within that time, I'll make everything that scares you vanish. Ahaha, this will be fun."

Route Selection Free Card

"Liam Evans. Cursed with the crazy curiosity of a cat. Say, shall we do something naught together...?"

Blind Love END CG Card

"Please. At the very last moment... I want my life to end in your hands. Only then, for the first time, I’ll feel glad to have been born."

Crazy Love END CG Card

"You may or may not be by my side tomorrow. But, even so... I love you."

Sweet Temptation Gacha Card

"Am I trying to tempt you? Mm, I am. I'll always be a cat who wants to win you over using every method possible."

2023 Countdown Collection Event ECB Card

"It'd be nice if I could be reborn as someone stronger and kinder with every new year. But since that's not possible... I'll have to do my best as I am, right?"

True Vows To The Jet-Black Bride

"Forever and ever, I will reach towards you, my star. ... Thank you for marrying someone like me."

3★ Cards

Standard Gacha

Day Card: I'm good at latte art. Does that make me well-liked? Fufu, I wonder?

Night Card: I... I'm so happy I can escort you. Should I take you away like this?

Main Story Chapter 2 CG Card

"Now, as a stage actor and a member of Crown, I will put on a show just for you."

Main Story Chapter 18 CG Card

"Why… why are you doing this for me—"

Main Story Chapter 25 Blind Love CG Card

"I beg you. At the very end— I want to die by your hands. Only then, for the first time, I’ll feel glad to have been born."

Main Story Chapter 25 Mad Love CG Card

"There's a possibility you won't be my side tomorrow. Even so... I love you."

Doting LoveHolic (EN: Obsession Devotion)

"Do you think I can leave you? The only time I'll ever leave you is... when my life comes to an end."

1st Birthday Campaign CG Card

"I want you to make me even more aware of this painful yet blissful reality. Because I love everything about it."

...

Night Time Home Screen Lines

"Going to sleep already? What if I said you can't sleep yet? Ahaha! Sorry, I just love you so much... I don't want to bother you."

"I like night time. It's quiet, I can do various things while keeping myself hidden, and... I can have leisurely conversations with you like this."

"Are you sleepy already? Okay, I'll come see you again tomorrow. ... Mm-hm, good night."

"Good night. I hope to see you again tomorrow."

[asksavel]

Happy New Year!

December 31st has come and gone for me at this time, and it's the new year. I'm doing my thanks on this bright new year because some may know or remember that that date is not one I like.

I want to say thank you to so so very many of you that have touched my heart over what was argueably one of the worst years of my life offline. Too much happened, simply too much, and it's not a story for here, nor this day.

I want to walk into the new year with a much fresher mind, a much happier mindset, and get back into finishing this story, along with starting a new one that I truly have two very special people to thank, but also all of you! Because if it wasn't for your love towards Kyogre, Groudon and Kyurem, @askthehoenngods would not exist to continue the mantle once this blog is done.

(The simps were a hilarious surprise that truly made me laugh so very hard. Keep doing your thing over there. ;) )

And so, I thank:

@symphonies-of-silver - for designing an incredible Kyogre for me, and went on to design my universe's Groudon. It's been a true pleasure to chat to you and get to know you this year. Thank you <3

@lustrous-dawn - For sharing your wonderful world with me, to talking to me, to putting up with me this year. I truly look forward to not only reading your works, but for what we both have in store. I sincerely hope this year is kind to you. Should you ever write a book, know I'll be your first customer. ;) Thank you <3

@askdeoxys - We don't talk much, and we don't need to. It's nice to know one of the old crowd is among us once more, sharing your light with this community. I wish we could've talked more last year about fun stuff rather than everything else, and I feel I let you down. I'm sorry that I did, and I hope this year, I am more like the person you remember and hold close. Thank you <3

@curce - Thank you for everything. Your kindness, your asks, and for accepting me even at my worst this year. Thank you.

@vall007 - Your pure, unrelenting positive energy is a joy to be around. You are wonderful and I am blessed to know someone so truly kind. Thank you.

@lightofunova - I was thrilled to have you as my secret santa this year! We don't talk much, but that's because I don't feel we need to to know that you're appreciated very much. Needless to say, you left an impression on this old fool ;) Thank you.

@asktheisle - You knew my secret with Laivan and kept it ;) But not only that, it's been awesome to get to know you more last year. I hope this year, we can continue that trend. Thank you <3

@askthetraveller - For always having my back, for always being there, know that I treasure you. You are my best friend. Thank you always Bagel.

To everyone in both the PokePalooza server and the Pokeask Lounge servers, I say thank you all for putting up with me and my silliness. PokePalooza especially for showing me deep kindness in one of the darkest moments of my life, the advice you gave me and the sympathy. You have all shown me love, to which I can only ever be thankful for.

2023 was a dark year, but it helped to know so many people had my back. So many people out there have been here, following and supporting, all nearly 1,500 of you (yep that milestone is very close ahaha)

Here's to a much brighter future. <3

Love, Skins

[bubblessunshinehoney]

day 24- Pegging with Chris Evans

1329 words

18+ only! NO MINOR INTERACTIONS

Kinktober masterlist

A/N: that's a fucking wet dream this fic. Like...i wish i could do that so bad ahaha, anyway. My inner whore sings that kinktober, hope you will enjoy it as much as i did while writing it.

Yes the gif i used..it's an excuse, because it always makes me feel things hehe.

Enjoy,

Cloudy

Don't be shy to comment, reblog or like! :)

TW: anal (pegging, male receiving), mention of oral (r receiving), praise kink, dom!reader (no name calling though), Chris is called a pretty boy and he wikes it. Two idiots in love, bff in love.

not beta read, english is not my first language, all mistakes are my own

“So, you’ve done it, multiples time”, he asks you with pink cheeks.

“Yes I did, Chris. Why?”

Well, the why is…he wants you to peg him.

You’re his best friend from…he can’t even remember, he just knows he can trust you and…fuck he’s not gonna lie, he always wanted to have you…more than just friend.

“I want to try.”

You laugh, not mocking, genuinely because you never thought the conversation was leading to this particular aspect of your sex life. Especially with your best friend, whom you had a big crush on for the past years.

“You want me to peg you?”

He nods and looks at you up down. “Yeah, I’ve…been thinking about it from some time now. Would you like to do it? You can say no, but I trust you with my life…”

“And your ass apparently”, you joke and you both laugh.

Three weeks later, Chris is stopping by your place. You are a bit…eager to be honest. You said yes, because you’ve dream of fucking America’s ass for some time now and even more since he asked you. You already have the strap on, under your sweats. He told you; he wanted you to have the complete control. He was submitting to you.

“Hey” he greets you with his deep voice.

“Hey, handsome. How was your trip?” you ask, but the look he gives make you understand…that he’s not here for small talk. And you understand it even more, when the door closed, and he slams you on the wall and kisses you hard.

“Fuck, I want to do that for years”, he groans. You can only gasp, when he massages your butt and kisses your neck. “Fuck, you smell and feel amazing Y/N”. You hold onto him, when he carries you to your room, when he realises you have the stap already, he bucks his hips against you. “You’re gonna fuck me, Y/N”. You can only nod and tugs on his hair.

He lays you on the bed and looks at you. “Can I take off your clothes?”

“Yes, you can Chris.” He does it slowly, gently, kissing every bit of skin that appears. Then he sees the strap and he moans.

“Oh my god, you look beautiful with it.” You smile and blush a little. Always feeling butterflies in your stomach when Chris is complimenting you. You sit and tug on his pants.

“Your turn. Get naked, ass up, I’m gonna prep you.” He takes less ceremony to strip. He slides his pants down with his boxers and his cock bounces freely. His big fat and hard cock that makes you salivate since he sends you the nude pic by mistakes.

“Was it really a mistake, Chris?” you ask him. He chuckles.

“Not really, was a drunk decision mainly…”. You sit up and kisses him. Fuck you’re already addicted to him. And so does he, he holds you tight and deepens the kiss, panting when he needs air. “Fuck, I’ve been jerking off on the thought of you fucking my ass for weeks now.” You smirk and stroke his chest.

“Did you play with your tight hole, like I told you?”, he blushes at your question, but nods to affirm he did it. “Good, now, lay back and I will take care of you, knees to your chest so I can see you little back hole, Chris”, you purr in his ear.

He lays back and holds his legs to his chest, exposing his ass. You rub his legs and puts your strap beside his cock. “Look at that, almost the same size. Fuck after I fuck you ass, you will have to fuck my pussy.” You both gasp at your revelation. You look at him, scared that he would say no.

“Your wishes are my commands, ma’am.” You kiss him and rubs your strap on his cock, making him moan. Then you grab the lube and puts some on your fingers to go tease him down there, he arches his back.

“So pretty, Chris, my pretty boy”. He blushes, getting flustered by your words. You smile and stroke his cheek, making him blush harder. “Nobody ever called you pretty boy?”. He shakes his head.

“Only my mom…” You kiss him tenderly, your finger pushes in his tight hole, making him squirm.

“Do you like when I call you my pretty boy?”, you purr against his temple. He nods and breathlessly say yes.

From then, you focus on his reaction when you start to thrust two fingers inside him, he looks straight into your eyes, the blue of them making you shiver from lust. The pupils are blown wide, and he rocks his hips in time with your fingers. “Ready for a third one pretty boy?”

“Yeessss, please, fuck me!”

“So polite”, you smile and add more lube to let your third fingers inside. He groans and looks at you, then at your strap and he holds it tight, stroking it. “Oh, my pretty boy is eager.” He’s flustered again, not able to get use to the nickname and the tone of your voice…why did he wait so long? “Two idiots in love maybe, Chris”, you reply, making him realises he said it out loud.

“I want your cock, now, please. I’m ready, I promise.” You nod and puts more lube on the strap and on his hole, before settling the fake cock at his entrance and you push in, slowly, looking at his face for discomfort. You find any, only relief and lust, he holds your hands that are on his legs, and he moans, a beautiful one, the one you make when a good cock enters your pussy.

“Fuck, look at you pretty boy, taking my cock so well… my good pretty boy” That praise makes him moan louder and he rocks his hips. A signal, you take, and you start to thrust in and out. He moans louder, bringing you down on him for a kiss, making you bottom out, when you feel your thighs against his ass, you moan in the kiss.

“Yes, fuck me, wrecked me, please!” chants Chris. He grabs your waist and gives you the pace he wants, you smile and do like he wishes, taking hold of his cock, your fingers not touching when they hold it. Your jerk him off on time with your hips and Chris’s eyes roll back, his mouth hangs open and a silence moan leave it.

“I’M GONNA CUM”, he screams after a while, you go harder, rolling your hips and you find his prostate, his cock jumping in your hand and his back arching hard. “Right here”, he pants. He wraps his hand around yours and helps you jerk him.

“Such a pretty boy, come on, cum all over you, make a big mess for me.” He moans, heaves, pants and then, he lets go. Cumming all over his chest, big fat rope painting his tummy and chest hair, some landing on his chin. You fuck him through his orgasm, and you feel your wetness pooling down your legs…you’ve never been so turned on while pegging someone.

He taps your arm gently, and you pull out slowly, massaging his legs and helping him stretch them, you lay beside him, and you hug him, licking the sperm on his chin and kissing him after, making him groan and holds the back of your head. You both open your eyes and smile at each other. “Not letting you go, I want this with you, and more. I want you to be my girlfriend Y/N.” You kiss him again.

“I want that too, Chris, so much.” He smiles and bites your lip.

“Your turn, young lady, let me taste that pussy.” You kneel on the bed to take the strap off, and when it’s done, he hoists you on his face. “Sit on my face, can’t feel my legs right now” You giggle, and moan when his tongue licks your wetness.

taglist : @navybrat817 @christywantspizza @buckyalpine @iloveprettyboysblog @ethreal-love @nailedbymandy @captainsimagines @buckybarnesandmarvel @rogersandlightwood @sparkledfirecracker @barneswinterraven @hansensgirl @blades-and-heartbreak @runa-falls @chrisdrysdale