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#i live to make people feel comfortable and safe
genderqueerdykes · 2 days
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if you are a trans boy, especially a teenage trans boy, i wanted to say that as a trans man in their 30's, you have my deepest respects and condolences for what you may be going through right now.
it has become socially acceptable and basically online custom to bully teenage trans boys & mascs, call them cringy, or excuse misgendering them for whatever reason. people put trans boys on this pedestal of "must perform masculinity and manhood to cartoonish degrees" even though they're still children.
people make trans boys fight for their manhood before they can even be boys. i am sorry people can be so judgmental and harsh on you. you are not wrong for wanting to be a boy. you are experiencing something wonderful. it's okay if you still want to be a boy even if people have treated you poorly, or tried to make you feel bad for being a boy. there is nothing wrong with being a boy.
it's okay if you never socially transition. it's okay if you're afraid to come out because it's not safe. it's okay if you never change your outward appearance. it's okay if you try very hard to pass but struggle to. it's okay if you wear "women's" clothing and shoes, bras, makeup, etc., it's okay if you're gay and love other men. it's okay if you're scared of hrt. it's okay if you don't want surgery. it's okay if you mainly occupy girl's spaces still. people will find every reason to pick these things apart and ridicule trans boys for, but they are all perfectly fine experiences that do not make you any less of a boy. you are the one who is in control of your transition, presentation, and state of being- you should be able to prioritize your safety over the comfort of random strangers who have no impact over how you live your life.
i've been put through this too, but later in life as i came out when i was an adult. people still try to make me feel bad for identifying as a trans man, for whatever reason they have in their head to justify hatred of a trans person. i've had enough. there will never be an excuse for how people try to excuse the infantilization and abuse that trans men and trans boys face.
take care of yourselves, no matter what age you are, if you are a trans boy, man, or masc you deserve to know that other trans men care about you, especially when people are scrambling to find ways to punch down on you. there are people who suck, but there are also a lot of people who care about you. keep your chin up. you know who you are
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sunkissed-zegras · 3 days
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I’m just saying…. headcannons for paige with a bestfriend to partner who’s an introvert.
And I mean those introverts who seem quiet but the moment they get comfortable around you it’s over, but like only they get to see that side.
Paige seems like an extrovert that adopts introverts, like just imagine her having to drag her partner out of their room all the time cuz they’re a damn hermit.
-🐹
─ warnings | mention of drinking, teasing, fluff, nothin' else?
─ taglist | @xocherishxo @iienstein @yazmunson @euphternal and here's a link to my taglist if anyone would like to join!!
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honestly, you are so right in that assumption
she definitely gets closer with more introverted people, bc opposites DO really attract
when you guys first met it was your freshman year at uconn, at first you'd probably think she's WAY too much ─ maybe even cocky LOL (but who can blame her she's the best)
but when you spend more one on one time with her, you realize she's really funny and sweet
because you're so quiet, paige would be naturally drawn to you cus she gets to know you
so she just pesters you until you eventually give in and hang out with her
from that point on, the one is never seen without the other
you guys would always be together
but like... usually, you're just WITH paige so people don't really acknowledge you cus you're so quiet
but then paige would like force you to socialize
"this is y/n, i promise she's fun you just gotta put a little liquor in her-" "PAIGE."
she would push you toward her close friends the most, def like ice, azzi, nika and kk
ESPECIALLY kk!
and then you eventually would get really close with them, you all have your cute little friend group
you and ice would make fun of paige and kk together, you and azzi are kinda similar so you find yourself hanging out with her alone a lot more, and nika would force you out your shell a lot too
after a couple months of being friends, paige would definitely find herself catching feels
like i've said in my other headcanons, she just thinks you're such a big source of comfort for her and it slowly just becomes full-on adoration cus
she adores you
and you compliment her personality so well she is just like "i NEED to have her right now"
she ends up confessing one night after a really terrible game and then y'all kiss ...
and the rest is history 🤗🤗🤗
jk here's some relationship headcanons
again, you are so right nonnie
like i mentioned, one is never seen without the other
so you're always tied at the hip, especially at parties
at first she has to force you
like FULL force
she calls backup ofc ice and kk come and then its 3 vs 1
they end up winning
and this happens time and time again, you just get so worn down you'd rather just endure the damn party then listen to all three of them scream at you
which was the goal 🥰
and you're definitely the sober one 95% of the time so you will be taking care of a very drunk paige
(maybe some separate headcanons for her if yall want)
and sometimes even ice/kk but it's mostly just your girlfriend
anyway, yeah you take her home, take of her and then get her into bed
and when you try to leave she will be so dramatic, she forces you to stay with her
you don't mind cus you love cuddly paige
but the 5% when you're the one who's blackout drunk, paige is gonna take such good care of you
because you're so introverted when you're sober, you're probably gonna be such a rowdy drunk
yes im her shes me
so paige makes sure you don't get into trouble and gets you home safe and sound
but if you do something stupid, she will never ever let you live it down
"remember that time you jumped into the pool and-" "SHUT THE FUCK UP"
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↳ make sure to check out my navigation or masterlist if you enjoyed! any interaction is greatly appreciated !
↳ thank you for reading all the way through, as always ♡
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thequietkid-moonie · 7 hours
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Hi~ Hi! ~How are you? Don't forget to rest, this is very important!
Can I request Welt Yang, Dan Heng and Arlan with a blind reader(gn or male)? Reader can protect himself, reserved and calm, but there are days.... When reader very upset about what he can't see their ٩(๑꒦ິȏ꒦ິ๑)۶
(hurt /comfort )
Reserved and calm blind S/O
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[ HEADCANONS ] [ Welt, Dan Heng, Arlan ]
[ Honkai Star Rail ]
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Hehe :3c thanks for being so considerate and requesting some of my favorites boooooys ~
I think i already said this before but one of my biggest fears is to be completely blind, but writing this kind of prompt actually makes me feel comforted and less afraid! So thank you
Also WE NEED MORE ARLAN CONTENT!! HE DESERVE MORE LOVE!! COME ONE, HOYOVERSE!! THIS IS NOT FAIR FOR MY POOR BOY!! EVEN PEPPY HAS MORE LOVE
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Welt Yang
Once you two start to be in a relationship Welt is already sure of what he feels for you and that he wants to share his life with you, he isn't the type to tell everyone about your relationship but is quite obvious that you two are together by how close he likes to stay with you or the expression full of adoration Welts has whenever he look at you
Welt doesn't think that your disability is a problem for your relasionship and he has no problem with helping you around if you need it, however he won't underestimate you in the slighlest, if you say that you are capable of taking care of yourself then he will step back and let you walk around on your own, just offering you his help when is need it (or when you want it)
Welt loves you and cares for you so of course he will look after your well-being, he wants to make sure you are safe and is willing to use his own strenght to help you and protect you if you ever need it (just as he is willing to protect the rest of the crew), even so he knows really well that you are more than capable to protect yourself and he is willing to step back and let you fight on your own (he doesn't say it often but he feel quite prideful of the fact that you are more capable of protecting yourself, and even more whenever he can see you in action)
Although, whenever you two are in a new place Welt is a little more cautious with where you walk and what you touch, always offering you his hand so he can guide you around until you feel comfortable enough to do it by your self (he can't really let you borrow his cane but he can always get one for yourself)
If you ever ask him to describe something for you he can do it, he takes a moment to be able to think on how to describe something in the best way posible and he is actually really good at doing it (he once worked in an animation company so he knows how to do it, however he sometimes can be a little too specific or talk with technicalities so he may have to explain a few things twice, but he doesn't mind and actually apologize for not being clear enough with a soft chuckle)
Your calm and reserved nature is no a problem for him, he knows that he must win your trust and make you feel comfortable with him for you to open up and he is more than willing to wait for you to talk to him whenever you are ready, in the mean time you two can just spend some quality time together
The only thing that can posibly bother him about your reserved nature is if you hide what you feel and what trouble you, he understand if you don't want to seem as weak (specially by the fact that you are blind and people can underestimate you by that) or even show vulnerability, he is your partner and he wants to be able to help you, he is willing to wait for you to be comfortable but if you don't seem to talk about something that is bothering you Welt will have no other option than ask you right away
Welt knows that even if you are used to your condition and even already learn to live with it that doesn't mean it wont bother you at times or that it can't cause you troubles, so when he gets to know that there are days that you just feel bad about being blind and about not being able to see anything he isn't too surprised about it, still he won't really take it in a bad way nor think you are exaggerating or something
Welt is actually pretty good at comforting you, he doesn't like leaving you alone when you feel so bad but he is more than willing to just sit at your side and make you company, also he can be a shoulder to cry or someone to vent to and he pretty much just let you vent all you need without saying much, just the necesary for you to know that he is here for you (probably just holding you close in a really comforting embrace, as if he was trying to hide you from the world so is just the two of you). Welt is really with words too, he doesn't sugar coat things but know what to say in the right moment
Even if you never feel bad about your condition Welt is constantly giving you reasurance about how amazing and valuable you are, a disability doesn't make you less than anyone else and doesn't make him love you less, so you doesn't have to worry nor feel insecure, and yet he is more than willing to repeat it for you a million of times if that makes you feel better
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Dan Heng
Dan Heng may feel quite troubled with the idea of starting a relationship for how much troubles he has with himself and his past, still he doesn't want to stop himself from walk in his own path, so, even if he can feel quite shy about the romantic stuff once he knows he likes you and his feelings are reciprocated he doesn't see why not at least give a try
Dan Heng isn't troubled in the slighest for your disability, he can feel a little sad about when thinking on it but he normally doesn't say anything about it (not wanting to upset you or even offend you by accident), he does respect you a lot and don't exactly underestimate you but he can't help but worry about you, he had a lot of troubles on the past and now that he finally can have some peace with people he can trust and love he just doesn't want to lose that
Even when you tell Dan Heng that you are more than capable to protect yourself that doesn't stop him from wanting to protect you, is just part of his caring nature (and he fears that his past just bring you problems), he just can't help but glance at you from time to time to make sure that you are alright or just to know that you are still there (in all honestly, Dan Heng sometimes just fears that something bad would happen to you and he need that constant reasurance even if you weren't blind he will feel the same)
He prefers to avoid getting into troubles but there are times when it is imposible but is in those times that he can see you actually defending yourself, and, even when he hates seeing you getting into troubles he also feel quite relief and even at ease knowing that you aren't defendless
Dan Heng doesn't mind at all your calm and reserved personality, it is a good change from the March and the trailblazer energetic mess that they are and your personality just helps him feel more at easy and comfortable, he is happy if you two just spend some quality time, even if you were just in the same room doing completely diferent things he will still appreciate those moments with all his heart
Dan Heng tries really hard to don't underestimate because of your disability but he just can't help but want to help you, and most of the times he just does things to help you unconsciously, taking your hand to help you guide yourself or making sure there is nothing that can obstruct your path while walking, he also normally walk by your side and tries to make sure no one bump into you or you yourself end up bumping into something
Whenever you have to visit a new place Dan Heng likes to walk slowly, just waiting for you to feel comfortable enough to walk with more confidence, as well he tries to describe you your surroundings mainly to warn you of what it is around (even when he is close, ready to help you avoid get hurt). He doesn't really think he is good at describing things for you but if you really want to he'll give a try, most of the time he gives good describes about the things you ask him but feels a little embarrassed if someone else heard him doing it (not that he will stop, he just can't say no to you when you ask for his help)
Dan Heng undestands really well your reserved nature, there are things that he prefer to keep for himself too, still he tries to remember you from time to time that you aren't alone in life, you have the rest of the astral express crew and you have him, even if the only thing he can do for you is be by your side the he gladly do it. When he start noticing that you feel more down Dan Heng imediatly has the impulse to offer you help and yet he ask you if he can help or you rather prefer to be alone, he doesn't like the idea of leaving you but if you feel more comfortable by being alone the he will leave you have time for yourself
Dan Heng isn't really the best to offer comfort but he at least decide to be a shoulder to cry if you need it, just letting you vent and hearing you with care, holding you close to him in a comforting embrace (if that helps you and you left him, of course) but without saying much, still he does say a few things about how important you are. Dan Heng feels quite bad about not being able to offer more comfort so he will decide to try to be more open about how much he cares for you and how important you are for him and the rest of the crew (also, he will probably ask Himeko or Welt for some device to be able to help you feel better about yourself)
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Arlan
Arlan is someone really caring and selfless and when he start a relasionship with you he is more than ready to try his hardest to be a good boyfriend for you (what will take him some time and tries because Arlan tend to be way too selfless and dedicated to his job), even so, there is no doubt on how much Arlan actually loves you, even his co-workers notice and always express how happy they are for him embarrasing him on the process
The fact that you are blind doesn't bother Arlan but it does worry him, no matter how stronge and capable you are to defend yourself that doesn't stop him from worry about you (but that doesn't mean he doesn't find you incredibly amazing and admirable, everytime he thinks on how you are more than capable to protect yourself even despite not being able to see he feels motivated to do a great job in the Herta Space Station and even become stronger), Arlan is selfless and more than ready to step in the front of the battlefield to protect everyone and everything on the Space Station, and since you are so special for him that feeling just intensifies, he is naturally caring so he will always express it for you (along with his infinite love for you, most of the time he just does without noticing but with a lot of confidence, that is why he always gets embarrased when you or someone else point it out)
Most of the time Arlan is too busy to spend as much time as he would like with you so he treasures all the moments he has with you and actually tries to accommodate his schedule to be with you (thanks to Asta for that too) and when he can't he just let you with Peppy, letting you two at each other's care
Whenever you two are together Arlan tries to pay attention to the surroundings to make sure nothing will get in your way and bring you troubles, however whenever he is with you is just matter of time for him to feel so relaxed that he can let his guard down and just forget about all his work and worries for a moment, and everytime it happens he has a smile in his face, without fail. Even if he gets distracted he is quick to react, so even if he lets his guard down if something may threaten you (even something small like an obstacle that makes you stumble) he is quick to take care of it and will even apologize for let it happen
Arlan doesn't feel to skilled to be able to describe things for you if you ask him, he is more formal when describing things because of his work so he isn't confident to do it because he thinks he may just end up disappointing you so he ask Asta to do it for him, he knows she is better at helping you with that so he just steps back and watch you two talk about all you want (he feels a little bad for not being able to help you but doesn't really say it), but if you want to touch something to take a glance of it he will be happy to be there to you to hand you whatever you want to touch and make sure you don't hurt yourself by accident (if you want to touch his face he will be incredibly flustered but wont be able to say no)
Arlan is respectful of your reserved personality and the fact that you are so calm actually helps him feel more relaxed and have time to actually rest whenever he is with you, still he may feel a little bit anxious if after some time of being in a relationship you still are too reserved and prefer to don't talk to him about how you feel, he'll try to help you feel comfortable to open up but he isn't too sure to how to do it so he may just ask some advice to Asta
Getting to know that there are days where you feel really bad or even depressed because of how you disability makes you lose a lot of beautiful scenaries (specially for how much everyone in the Space Station talks about the universe and their investigation) makes Arlan feel upsed too, not because he pity you but because he doesn't like seeing his lover so sad, he will just sit by your side and let you vent all you need, holding you close and just reasuring you that even if you can't see that doesn't makes you less valuable nor less lovable, in all honestly he feels bad for not being able to do more for you and probably apologize for it too, but he also promise to never leave you and always love you, he will do everything on his power to make you happy (probably will resort to use Asta and Peppy's help to comfort you because he feels like he can't do much for you, its okay as long as it helps you feel better again)
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mrs-snape5984 · 2 days
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„I hope, I’ll always have you in my mind, so that I know to find you every time.“
„Put your head on my chest, that’s your safe place. We‘ll fall deeper in love every day. From life unto life and for always.“ („Soul Mate“ by Flora Cash)
There’s something in my current life, that came hand in hand with my disease ME/CFS…slowly creeping into my fibres…infecting my mind with sadness. It’s loneliness, that I’m talking about. Overwhelming, crushing, suffocating loneliness.
Before this cruel bitch of a disease put a stopper in my life, as I knew it from before, I haven’t been healthy, either. But neither my severe Colitis Ulcerosa, nor the other few sicknesses and disabilities had achieved to break me the way, ME/CFS broke me!
What’s left, is only a shell of myself…a sad shadow of the woman, I’ve been prior to today. Where did the intelligent, sassy, witty and caring person go to, when she disappeared so insidiously from my personality? On some days, I still get a little glimpse of her, when I’m talking to my beloved friends @vulnus-sanare, @preciousthelmadonna or my bestie Miri, who often just “enjoys” sitting beside me in my dark room…embraced by silence and darkness. These tiny jiffies, when I’m recognising my previous character…my true nature, even though it’s only for a brief time, I’m feeling a little less anxious…a little less worthless.
But sadly, these moments become more rare with each new PEM crash of my disease (PEM = Post-exertional malaise = worsening of symptoms after certain activities). It feels as if I’m fading away from life…I’m fading away from other people’s lives as well as from my own.
Since I can’t leave my dark room - and most of the time even my bed - I’m not capable of joining social gatherings anymore. It’s impossible for me to endure listening to more than one person at once, so even my three kids have to “visit” me one after the other in my chamber. There are days, when I can’t even reply to messages from others, just because screen time is killing me.
All the more, I’m grateful for these few friends, who stay with me, no matter how silent I am, because they make me feel worthier and loved. And yet, I’m afraid of not being able to give them the same amount of support in return…due to the restrictions of my cruel reality, which are confining me.
So, there are many days, which I’m spending in total gloominess and silence with nothing but solitude surrounding me. And even if I’d be capable of sending text or audio messages (since I can’t type them out properly sometimes), I often hold myself back from reaching out to these understanding friends…only because I don’t want to be a burden to them.
I commissioned the lovely artist @hannisimp for this beautiful piece of art. Lin, you gave me exactly, what I needed with this tender artwork of yours. You gave me the feeling of being less alone. Severus accompanies me for 21 years now. He’s the safe haven, the comfort blanket, which I’m clinging to so desperately! My dear, I can’t stress enough, how grateful I am for your fine art. You made the love and the trust between Severus and my - oh, so self-inserted - OC Jules become palpable. There are no words to express my gratitude, so I just stay with these: Thank you for everything, my friend! Thank you for your talent, your kindness and each of your messages. I won’t ever take these things for granted.
🖤Severus & Julia🖤
🖤Sevy & Jules🖤
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I was thinking earlier about how most sinners in Viv’s Hell, particularly in the main cast, are in Hell because they were killers in life, because obviously, murder isn’t the only thing that gets you sent to Hell, and I doubt it’s the most common. Hell is full of terrible people of all kinds, not just killers. Homophobes, misogynists, abusers, racists, rapists, fascists. The worst of the worst.
But she can’t actually show any of these people being humanized, bettering themselves, and getting redeemed, because people would accuse her of saying those things are forgivable, and down playing the issue.
Look at how people reacted to Killjoy saying something homophobic. They immediately claimed that it made the show itself homophobic, even though Killjoy is an antagonist who’s homophobia is directly implied to be one of the reasons she’s in Hell.
Murder is a, “safe,” sin for the show to give the characters, because no one watching the show has been murdered, and probably very few of them personally know anybody who’s been murdered, so they don’t feel the need to treat the subject with any respect. Murder is a truly horrific tragedy that destroys innocent lives, but in fiction it’s just sorta hand waved most of the time, because it’s so far outside of the realm of reality for most people that we’re sorta just comfortable with it.
So she sorta has to have most of them be murderers, because what else can she make them?
Like, the only member of the main cast of sinners that doesn’t seem to be a murderer is Husk, who so far has been implied to be in Hell because of his alcoholism and gambling addiction, and that’s something you have to be careful about because those are both real complicated disorders that real people struggle with, and you run the risk of demonizing them if you aren’t careful.
Even though we’re largely desensitized to murder in media, no one’s worried about demonizing murderers, or generalizing them as being evil.
So again, it’s just easy to slap em with the murderer label and call it a day.
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royalarchivist · 3 months
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Pac: Take care of Ramon, take care of Richas, ok? See you on the other side, big boy.
Fit: [Laughs] Take it easy, big boy. Take it easy, big boy. Actually, nononono– You can't just say "big boy" and then just expect me to not drag you outta here. [Fit tries to lasso Pac] You're coming with me.
Pac: No, I need to leave!
Fit: You're coming with me. You are not dying today! You are not dying today!
Pac: I need to leave, Fit! I'm sorry, I'm sorry!
Ironmouse: Are you guys like, having sexy time?
Fit: There's homosexual activity going on Mouse, don't worry about us, ok?
Ironmouse: You guys, we don't have time to be gay right now.
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[ Full Transcript ↓ ]
-
Pac: I'm just here to say goodbye to you, Fit.
Fit: Goodbye? We're not– we're gonna be fine, we're going to get out of here, don't worry.
Aypierre: Yeah, don't worry!
Pac: I know, but like– I will sleep until the end, you know? I will pass through this moment sleeping, man. I won't be able to be awake for the moment.
Fit: [Laughs] You know, it's– I mean, if that's how you wanna go, but– I mean, that- I mean, isn't that bed kind of like.... I don't know, it's–
Pac: No no, I will be staying on the sofa, you know, I will be staying on the sofa.
Fit: Oh the sofa. Ok, that's a nice sofa! Yeah, that is a pretty nice sofa.
Pac: Yeah, it's a nice sofa right? No, yeah– I'm going to stay on the sofa, you know? So, since I will be going Fit... [Pac starts tossing Fit all his items]
Aypierre: [Not paying attention to their conversation] Is that bigger cell? I don't think it's a bigger- biggest one.
Fit: Oh... Thank you Pac, thank you.
Pac: Everything you need to survive, ok?
Fit: Wow.
Aypierre: Wow.
Pac: And if you need this one also, maybe, who knows? [Throws him more items]
Fit: Ohhh, well hey– just take this to remember me by, ok? [Tosses him a photo of himself – the same one Aypierre was carrying all day yesterday]
Pac: [Laughs] Ok, I will sleep holding the picture you know, like this. You know, I will dream about you, Fit. And I hope this is gonna be good dreams. I see you in the other side. Good luck, my friend.
Fit: The other side... Yeah, you know, yeah, we– we– you know? It's been an honor, Pac. It's been an honor, you know?
Pac: Yeah, for me too, you know? Take care of Ramon, take care of Richas, ok?
Fit: Ok.
Pac: See you on the other side, big boy.
Fit: I will sing your praise– Oh yeah, hey– [Laughs] Take it easy, big boy. Take it easy, big boy. Actually, nononono– You can't just say "big boy" and then just expect me to not drag you outta here. You're coming with me.
Pac: No, I need to leave!
Fit: You're coming with me. You are not dying today! You are not dying today!
Pac: I need to leave, Fit! I'm sorry, I'm sorry!
Fit: Sorry, there's–
Pac: I'm sorry!
Ironmouse: Are you guys like, having sexy time?
Fit: There's homosexual activity going on Mouse, don't worry about us, ok?
Ironmouse: You guys, you guys– we don't have time to be gay right now, come on. There's no time.
Pac: No, there's no time! Oh, goodbye Fit...
Fit: Ok, c'mon, no no no, come on, we got this we got this!
Pac: Goodbye Fit, I'm sorry!
Fit: [Laughs] Oh no...
#Pactw#FitMC#Hideduo#FitPac#QSMP#QSMP Prison#January 22 2024#So canonically how do you guys view this moment?#Did Pac just canonically conk out from stress?#Did he take sleeping pills on purpose to sleep through whatever awful thing was inevitably going to happen?#Curious to hear what other people think#I like to imagine the stress finally got to him#He spent the entire time trying to mirror things he saw Cell doing#and finally cried about it to Bagi#I can't blame him if he wants to sleep through the rest of it. Man's living in a place that's actively making him relive past trauma#Fit says he's carrying Pac in his backpack but I like to imagine that he just gave Pac a piggy back ride the entire way home :D#I imagined that for Purgatory too#it's cute#idk the whole idea of very traumatized characters being so comfortable around certain people#Idk the idea Pac feeling so safe around Fit#(despite being in a place that is actively stressing him out)#that he feels alright falling asleep and trusting him / Mike to protect him is sweet to me#Idk man I'm a big fan of the ''literal sleeping together'' trope#I love when characters take naps together it's so cute#esp when it's two traumatized characters with a lot of baggage / trust issues#It's nice#anyways I got way off topic with these tags LMAO sorry#I was gonna edit this down but I like the entire conversation so I'm leaving it as is#The YouTube editor living in my brain: Not great for viewer retension#Me: Shhhhhhhh I'm an Archivist. I can do whatever I want.
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uncanny-tranny · 8 months
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Your influence in this world doesn't need to be all-encompassing and World Changing. It can be small ripples. It can be gentle and easily missed.
Let yourself do small things. So often, people have this idea that to do "good things," it must be a grand gesture that changes every little thing. Honestly, that can be so intimidating and scary. We weren't meant to carry the world by ourselves. We each contribute, often in small ways, often in ways that aren't seen by everybody. But the people you affect might just take that kindness you gave them and let it light them home. Let yourself be that in whatever way you want. You don't need to carry the world alone.
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13eyond13 · 1 year
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Update on trying to be less lowkey about being gay at work. I told one of my bosses I'm "not straight" and i got a rainbow thingy to stick on my phone
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willowfey · 9 months
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starting to think maybe waking up with an anxiety stomachache every single morning and then needing to spend the entire day trying to get rid of said anxiety just to maybe have a few minutes in the evening of feeling relaxed before going to bed is perhaps not normal
#the first thing i do when i become conscious is check my phone to make sure nothing terrible happened to anyone i love while i slept#i never ever ever have plans and if anyone Else has plans i feel sick with anxiety until they’re back from them#if i have smth planned that week i feel completely tense and on edge until it happens#i didn’t used to be like this i hate hate hate it#i used to feel safe in my little house in the forest where i knew everyone in town and knew my way around with my eyes shut#it’s still the only place in the world i feel safe. that’s so unfair#my separation anxiety is ridiculous. if my mom goes to the store and doesn’t answer a text right away i start panicking#if my sister goes to a class or smth idk what to do with myself until she gets back#if i’m in the shower or have the fan on or headphones in suddenly i’ll think i hear someone shouting and i’ll have to quickly turn it off#ever since i moved here it’s been getting worse. i don’t feel safe here to begin with i feel so out of place it’s unreal#but then covid and trauma with my mother’s health and my uncle dying and multiple relatives getting sick and things happening to my friends#i know i have ptsd from very specific things that happened and i live on a hospital path so every day i hear sirens#and every time i do it fully triggers an anxiety attack in me for at least an hour. and my mom too#since being here my hometown burned and friends i thought would never grow apart did and my brother moved out#i know a lot of that is just Being In Your Low Twenties but also some of my worst trauma has happened in the last handful of years and now#now i’m just always scared. always uneasy. always worried. never fully relaxed. never feel fully safe. & idk how to be myself through that#i’m always paranoid and i never trust people irl anymore. ppl my mom or sister meet. i am so suspicious of them constantly.#if anything small changes at all i can’t handle it. my ability to deal with change has gone so downhill#in the last 5 years of being here i realised i was autistic which led to me unmasking a bit and that. comes with pros & cons doesn’t it#my own health has declined. my body changed a lot in ways i wasn’t prepared for and i had to get rid of most of my comfort clothes#sometimes i just wanna sit on the ground and cry about it and not have to also be the one that picks myself back up. y’know???#but at the very least i’d love to just wake up One Day w/o feeling sick with anxiety already. just one day i want to wake up feeling rested#i want to be myself again but can i start with not being scared? not being tired? i don’t know what to do anymore#i just watch my comfort videos and read my comfort fics and stay in my daydream world
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iamthekarmapolice · 5 days
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got pretty drunk with my manager and told her i really enjoy meeting new people here but I have bad social anxiety and we talked about it and I told her I was bullied as a kid and she said she wants to help me get over it and told me to please believe that everyone she’s spoken to has only said nice things about me
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girls-are-weird · 11 months
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hi. unlabeled person here. i consider myself a part of the LGBTQ+ community. i don't identify as queer. come at me, bro.
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inkdrawndreamer · 8 months
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Talking to people online is weird because, on the one hand, the added anonymity makes it easier to be honest about your own business, but on the other hand, it's possible to become just close enough to a person that you simultaneously know them on a deeply personal level and barely know them at all.
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inga-don-studio · 7 months
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I can’t believe that it took me nearly 3.5 whole decades to discover the joy of wrapping up under a thick warm blanket. This is the absolute best. Bliss.
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kiradical · 9 months
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I decided (very late for me) to take a shower and I don’t feel like I want to stop existing anymore. Still sad tho. Mostly just scared and lonely.
Tired of the lonely.
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frostbite-the-bat · 1 year
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I'm going back to sleep after this I only wanted to be up for a short while but I saw the notes on my blorbo house notes
I just want to state that no as far as I am aware I am not a system and the blorbo house is purely an imaginary thing that I made up, that just takes place "in my brain". It could've been any setting but when talking with my friend we made it be in my brain specifically because of things like saying a character is like a parasite in your brain or like you're rotating them in your mind... Just imagining how your blorbos would live in a house together, but it's tied to you specifically because they're away from their source in a safe environment with you specifically.... And also it's in my bio as a way to list some of my Blorbos
I am definitely very much so mental illness and let me tell you I am not normal about these characters I can get quite obsessive over these characters when hyperfixated but I feel like I had to make up a thing for them all so they feel like they're always there and aren't upset when I'm focusing on other things
I'm very happy that I made a post that's a hit with system communities but I'm just saying here to people possibly trying to diagnose me - I am not a system as far as I know, I definitely have undiagnosed things but DID/OSSD is not it because... I think I'd know if that was the case
But yeah, again, the blorbo dream house is a purely made up thing and I'm just mentally ill about fictional characters in Another Way
(I think a part of this is the wording of my post, especially when I said "supposedly exists in your brain specifically" I worded it that way because we were just making this up at first and it was kinda funny that like... I was discussing an AU thingy with a friend when the setting is MY brain like the were talking about a fictional place in another person's "mind". Except not really it's just... Made up. It's like saying your brain is empty except for 2 braincells who just slap each other with pillows, personifying 'two braincells')
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