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#i love it here BECAUSE it is hundreds of miles from the coast
rocket-candy-heart · 10 months
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The Last Bristolian Pirate is a totally nonsensical cover of The Last Saskatchewan Pirate because there is nowhere in England that is actually far away from the sea
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hej! so first of all I'd like to thank you for all the amazing work you do, honestly you're my hero.
second, I wanted to know if you know any fanfictions with both stiles and derek point of view (preferable they being enemies at the beginning) because I've been looking for some like this and can't find. thanks!
I love alternating POV. Here's some with enemies to lovers for you.
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Witch in my woods by changez
(1/1 I 5,003 I Teen)
Leaving his pack, Stiles is inexplicably drawn to the West Coast. Unbeknownst to Stiles, someone is inexplicably drawn to him.
only you can mend by bibliosexual
(1/1 I 7,226 I Mature)
The roommate part seems like the best idea of them all, at least for the first day or so of knowing him, before Stiles shows up.
Scott McCall is nineteen, athletic and cheerful with a surfer-bro kind of vibe. There’s something about his face, his goofy puppy grin and floppy hair and warm brown eyes, that reads as inherently wholesome. Derek likes that a lot. He likes the way Scott introduces himself with an easy, “Hey, man, nice to meet you,” and he likes the gentle yet firm way he shakes Derek’s hand. He’s the opposite of everyone Derek associated with in New York. He’s the kind of person Derek needs right now in his life. He’s going to be the perfect roommate.
And then there’s Stiles Stilinski.
How to Uncook an Egg by suburbanmotel
(1/1 I 15,406 I Mature)
It's all fun and games until someone gets their stupid feelings puked on.
//
Derek stares. “What are you talking about, Stiles?”
Stiles groans and surges forward, mouth on Derek’s mouth, hands in Derek’s hair, on the sides of his face, the back of his neck.
“No strings attached, ok?” Stiles says, breathless, against the side of Derek’s face, his jaw, his ear. “We can do that, if that’s what you want.”
“Is that whatyouwant?” Derek says. His hands are under Stiles' shirts, sliding against smooth smooth skin, up his sides around to his back, down the notches of his spine, everything warm and smooth. “Is it?”
Stiles just kisses him hard, harder and Derek just keeps kissing him back.
Or:
Derek never stays the night. Stiles pretends he doesn’t mind.
Baby and the Body by never_love_a_wild_thing
(8/8 I 28,179 I Teen)
Stiles recreates models' Instagram photos with his baby. At a fashion show one day, he runs into the model who's pictures he uses most often (and most ironically). Somehow they work through the animosity and find a family.
From The Wreckage by orphan_account, Winchesterek
(5/5 I 58,058 I Explicit)
The only thing Stiles wanted was a little freedom. He wanted to be able to walk where he wanted in the forest, wanted to be able to do what he wanted when he wanted and most of all he wanted to be an adult, especially because he was one. The last thing he wanted was to feel trapped by the Argent's rules about curfew. He understood that there were werewolves and getting too close to the were-border was dangerous, but hell if he was going to let that stop him from having a little fun.
Needless to say, fun was overrated and all Stiles wanted was to go home to his friends and father now.
Tell Me It's a Sure Thing by ofherlionheart
(10/10 I 67,451 I Mature)
Beacon Hills is a small town, something of a supernatural haven from hunters, but only because the Nemeton exudes so much twisted energy and attracts such ugly nasties on the regular that no hunter wants to get within a hundred miles of it. It is the hollow sanctuary where Derek and Lydia, like many others before and after them, ended up after fleeing from the nightmare of their old lives.
Then M. Stiles Stilinski arrives. Bodies begin to appear, hunters become bold enough to venture across town lines, and secrets begin to surface. But somehow, in spite of the growing chaos … Stiles is making it better.
You Don't Always Get What You Want by deadly_nightshade, Nerdy_fangirl_57
(7/? I 63,105 I Mature)
Stiles doesn't understand what he could have done to deserve this. Not only has the entire student body been out to get him since he first stepped foot into Beacon Hills High, but now he has to endure the constant bullying without his best friend Scott by his side. All in all school is survivable, even with all the harassment. That is until he finds out that Derek Hale, basketball superstar and Stiles' most persistent bully, is apparently his soulmate. Fan-fucking-tastic.
Derek can't believe this. It has to be a joke, it has to, because there is no way in hell that a freak like Stilinski could ever be his soulmate. He despises him more than anyone in the universe. So what if Derek thinks he has a cute nose, no one needs to know. Besides it doesn't matter anyway, he still hates Stilinski with every fiber of his being, his cute nose doesn't change a thing.
let slip the dogs of war by creationmyth
(12/12 I 86,920 I Explicit)
He stares at himself in the mirror. His cheeks are faintly blotchy, flush sparsely coloring down his neck. His eyes look glassy and half-crazed. “Get it the fuck together,” he growls lowly to his reflection. “You loseeverything. Get fucking used to it.”
He can’t stop thinking about it. How Derek looked at him, said his name reverently rather than disdainfully.
Stiles sits on the shower floor, shivering even though the spray is far too hot. He keeps replaying the words over and over -sometimes the person someone shows us and the person we choose to see are two different people.
For the first time, Stiles takes a moment to seriously consider that perhaps he has never known Derek Hale at all. 
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bees-with-swords · 1 year
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It is really really frustrating to put up with systemic issues about air pollution and fire season for OVER A DECADE, and now that the east coast of the US is dealing with smoke problems it's getting the kind of analysis and publicity in the media that I've been screaming myself hoarse for since I was seven years old. It's like Australia and California don't matter nearly as much to global media as New York does. It feels extremely shitty, like my house burned down and my family was displaced and a member of my community died, but right now wildfires are getting more attention than ever before because the east coast is getting just a slice of what we've been dealing with for years.
I just feel so much envy over the outpouring of awareness, love, and support, that I never received when exposed to air quality issues OR displacement. I've lost my childhood home, my community. The fire station we paid taxes for sent their engines to a wealthy neighbourhood 15 miles away---a neighbourhood that had opted, several years earlier, to get rid of their own fire station. The fire service didn't warn our neighbours on the private roads about the fire. Some barely made it out alive. One died. Because of the lack of warning, hundreds of pets and livestock couldn't be evacuated and burned alive. The very hills I grew up on were badly damaged by corporate policies after the fire, cutting down trees and causing massive erosion.
And all of that, all of that trauma that has left our community irreparably splintered, started out with small things. Like going outside and smelling smoke. So when the memes come in (the memes that have been made before but largely ignored by folks on the east coast) and the air quality control tips (turn on your shower, increase humidity, leave out trays of water), I can't help but feel... Lost? Is history repeating itself because folks truly didn't understand what we've been going through over here? Or because nobody cared? Does the Canadian government sincerely think they can allow campfires this late in the year?
Has nobody learned from us? My house burned down, my family is living with trauma and my parents are forced into an abusive living situation and the hills I grew up on are scarred from decades of fire suppression, and nobody learned from that? Why did it happen, then? Why is nobody from the East studying it, to make sure nobody over there goes through that? Why aren't Easterners talking about fireproof housing and controlled burns and living with fire rather than against it? Were you not watching us burn? Were you not learning from our baby steps? Why are you repeating our history?
People are asking such basic questions like 'how do I keep my air clean' and 'why do we have so much fire suddenly' instead of 'how do I install metal shutters on my home' and 'how do we eradicate settler-colonialism from our ideas about forest management?' and 'how do I support fire and climate refugees?'
It feels like I've returned from the war just to watch a dozen fresh faced recruits march off eagerly. Was nobody watching? Did nobody care, did nobody learn? If people won't seek out information until the smoke is in their lungs, how am I supposed to feel any hope? I don't want my job to be endlessly educating people who don't have a reason to care yet. I would have thought you cared already. I would have thought we'd be further along.
Please do research. I don't have the energy to educate people right now, I did it for years and years but so few people listened. Go look up something about TEK and controlled burns and fire suppression and old growth forests. There's lots of material you've probably never looked at. I know it can be hard to care about what goes on in other parts of the world, but now it's affecting you. You need to know the basics of what's wrong with our system, you need to know whether fire suppression may have long term implications for your area, you need to know how to do your part in local politics, and you need to know how to help the people who are affected.
After our house burned down I got a quilt. Pajaro Valley Quilt Association made quilts for fire victims, and my mom grabbed me the nicest one they had. You have to understand, I didn't have any nice things at that point. Most of my most precious possessions didn't make it out of the fire. But I have this quilt, because the community came together and gave me one nice thing that I'll be able to keep for the next generation. We need more of that. We need people to pour out love and make donations and send cards and do anything, anything, just to make someone feel less bad on the worst day of their life. If you want to help, that's how.
I didn't get any quilts from the east coast. It feels like everyone stopped caring after the first few years of fires and drought. It became old news.
But it's still real here, it's still exhausting, and it could be you too unless we all get on the same page.
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animalsofkauai · 7 months
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Hard to believe it was exactly a year ago that we visited the Mediterranean. Back to the more relaxed pace of Kauai this year. If my defibrillator continues to work, I hope to create a weekly edition of my blog this year.
These islands have always intrigued me. Partly because of their seemingly random discovery 1500 years ago by some Polynesians in a canoe, and partly because of their explosive but transient existence. More on those topics on another day.
We have been to the Big Island and Maui twice each before, but our last 5 trips have been to Kauai. In my opinion it is the least spoiled (least developed) with friendly locals, awesome hiking and scenery (NaPali Coast) and today’s topic….. wildlife.
As you can see below, the trip was pleasant and without any nasty animals in our row. Worth the extra $$.
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Our villa is one of 30 units…..deep within a volcanic crater about 75 yards from the ocean. This little guy and several hundred of his friends provide music for our daily happy hour.
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These NeNe below seem to be part duck and part goose. Interesting markings and much more pleasant than their Cdn cousins. Found only in Hawaii.
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This island is also filled with wild Roosters and Hens from the deepest jungle to every roadside. Reportedly a hurricane in the 80s or 90s released a few thousand into the wild and the rest is history. All the islands have wild chickens but more here than elsewhere.
On Poipu Beach……. Giant Green Turtles make regular appearances for naps. About 5 feet long and 400-500 pounds, the pictures do not do justice to the enormity of these beasts. Strictly protected and adored by the local community.
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The beaches here are many and mostly deserted. Here Princess returns to the blog to check out the Monk Seals
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These 500 pounds seals are only found in the Hawaiian chain of islands.
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Most reside near Kauai and further north along the numerous Atolls and very small islands(such as Midway) stretching north from here. The chain of Atolls beyond Kauai lasts for about 1000 miles towards Japan.
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Not concerned at all with people. Just belly up and basking. These 2 guys were hanging out yesterday at different points along our swimming beach stroll. Walkers like us plant stakes around them for privacy so the rare numb nuts gets the point not to harass.
And finally Princess had her birthday dinner last week.
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No need for hair curlers on the island and we love the open air restaurants.
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Next week…….. the creation and erosion of all these beautiful places.
P.S. We are heading to Paris for a few days in August during the Olympics then cruising the Seine to see the historic beaches in Normandy. Stay tuned for a summer of WW2 sites and stories
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somedarkhollow · 1 year
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regional magic
I’m not sure what they put in the twilight movies and gilmore girls and certain corners of warm evenings on the east coast, but there’s something mystical there. I remember the feeling so distinctly because I spent most of my life living on the west coast. there is west coast magic, don’t get me wrong. the tears in my eyes as I drive down the pacific coast highway with my windows rolled all the way down listening to the indie alternative radio station or the coo of a morning dove in dry air or even most of Lana del Rey’s early music all contains the glittering magic of my former home region. but here I lay, belly down on my bed less than a hundred miles from where I lay the first time I felt the east coast magic. it was a warm, late summer night and the air was thick before it began to softly rain. I lay with my window pushed up ever so slightly to feel the warm air after sitting in air conditioning all day at work and lit a candle. it was earlier then, still light, I remember laying there looking up at the ceiling and not knowing how to think about the future at all, but I thought of the hustle on the freeway just a hop and a skip away from where I lay my head, I thought about new york and simon and garfunkel and falling in love. it seemed so nostalgic but somehow pulled me present. 
I’m wondering if moving to the south will reveal it’s own special kind of magic. when I lived in West Virginia I mostly felt specifically West Virginia magic. The kind that pours out of a bottle of moonshine and teaches you to be brave, almost a confrontation and private reckoning in the woods as you learn how people are just people and where the ridges connect and divide. 
Whatever the magic is in virginia, I hope I can keep the magic from the west, the east, and the hill country tucked into my jacket pocket or sewn into the hem of my skirt like little stars. I hope i can stop running and let what needs to be let go be gone. maybe the magic of virginia will be less like magic and more like a balm for the girl living out her days warped by a past she barely remembers, enchanted by magic she’ll never forget. 
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xtruss · 4 months
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The Gulf Of Maine Is Warming Fast. What Does That Mean For Lobsters—And Everything Else?
National Geographic photographer Brian Skerry has been diving in the Gulf of Maine for more than 40 years. After learning these waters were a harbinger of climate change, he set out to document the rapid shift and its ripple effects.
— Photographs By Brian Skerry | As Told To Anna Peele | May 14, 2024
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A large school of alewives migrates upstream through Mill Brook, an inland stream with waters that eventually flow into the Gulf of Maine. These fish live in the ocean but return to fresh water to spawn. Once depleted, the species rebounded after dam removals in the area, and now feed a variety of other fish, birds, and mammals.
The bounty of the Gulf of Maine. The sea within a sea, as it’s often called, is a body of water that extends 36,000 square miles along the eastern seaboard of North America, from Cape Cod, Massachusetts, to New Brunswick, and encompasses the coastlines of New Hampshire, Maine, and Nova Scotia. Indigenous Americans who have lived in this region for more than 12,000 years learned the gulf’s natural rhythms and sustainably harvested its rich waters. Europeans who began to settle in the area in the 15th century recorded tales of an endless abundance, with cod that measured up to five feet long. Before the American Revolution began, giant lobsters and thick schools of fish would have had a front-row seat to the Boston Tea Party.
I think of the Gulf of Maine as having been created from a perfect recipe that required a precise series of ingredients and steps. There is a robust watershed with many rivers flowing into the sea and a unique blend of currents that bring and mix nutrients, including upwelling from the continental shelf, the Gulf Stream, the Labrador, and counterclockwise coastal currents. Because of the Gulf of Maine’s geographic location in a temperate zone, a seasonal stratification that separates water into warmer and cooler layers also occurs here. The result has historically been the proliferation of life. But things have changed.
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Sea smoke rises over the ocean near Whaleback lighthouse at the mouth of the Piscataqua River in Kittery, one entrance to the Gulf of Maine. This fog forms when very cold air moves over warmer water, mixing with a shallow layer of warmer air above the ocean’s surface. As the warmer air cools, the excess vapor condenses.
Over the centuries, the rise of sophisticated commercial fishing fleets has led to a steep decline in marine wildlife. Atlantic cod, its supply once believed to be inexhaustible, is now at one percent of colonial levels. So within just a couple hundred years, we have removed 99 percent of this species from the region. In the past four decades spent exploring these waters, I have witnessed how such declines have made the ecosystem weaker and more vulnerable in ways I never imagined.
I grew up in a working-class town in Massachusetts, about 40 miles from the ocean, but my parents would take me to the beach in summertime. As early as I can remember, I fell in love with the sea. My dream was to be an ocean explorer and photographer, sharing all that I saw and learned. In my 26 years of capturing images for National Geographic, I’ve been fortunate to work on all seven continents and in nearly every marine ecosystem from the Equator to the poles. I have always felt, however, that the ocean suffers from a bit of a curse in that its exterior hides what lies beneath—both the exquisite natural beauty and the ongoing devastation.
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Marine ecologist Douglas Rasher collects water samples from a kelp forest near Winter Harbor. Along the southernmost coast of Maine, these essential marine habitats appeared healthy a few years ago but are now vanishing.
That’s why the most crucial part of my job doesn’t really happen in the water. Before each expedition, I first dive as deeply as possible into the world of researchers who dedicate their lives to understanding marine animals and their relationship to the environment. Only then can I bring the right visual context. Whether they’re images of orcas using different feeding strategies in order to share the rich complexity of whale culture or photos of a five-day-old harp seal pup falling through thin ice to show how deadly our warming planet has become for some species, my goal is to help people understand what’s happening in our world.
In Hot Water
Parts of the Northwest Atlantic, especially the Gulf of Maine and the Labrador Sea, have been heating up faster than 99 percent of the World’s Oceans.
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Why The Gulf Is Warming So Fast: The Gulf of Maine resembles a deep tub, its shallow banks inundated by cold Arctic waters. But melting fresh-water glaciers and other effects of climate change are altering long-established currents, according to the Gulf of Maine Research Institute, causing temperatures to warm three times as fast as other ocean waters.
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Years ago, I moved to the coast of Maine to more frequently explore these waters. In doing so, I saw signs of a looming threat. People in marine science and conservation communities had grown alarmed after reading a 2015 paper by Andrew Pershing (1), then chief scientific officer at the Gulf of Maine Research Institute. Within a few years, it became common knowledge among locals that the Gulf of Maine was warming faster than 99 percent of the world’s oceans.
— (1) Pershing’s report, “Slow Adaptation in the Face of Rapid Warming Leads to Collapse of the Gulf of Maine Cod Fishery,” sparked research that shows how these waters have continued warming at an alarming rate.
I now felt an urgency to share the wonder of my native waters—to focus on the beautiful wildlife that remains while highlighting the effects of climate change. To get it right, to make sure my images were representative of that change and its enormous impact on the region, I contacted many scientists and experts who have spent decades studying the gulf.
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Top: Rare North Atlantic right whales glide through Cape Cod Bay in Massachusetts. These whales, some of the most endangered in the world, feed primarily on tiny creatures called copepods. As water temperatures rise, copepods have become leaner, imperiling the whales and larval lobsters that depend on them.
Bottom: These copepods, Calanus, are the main source of food for the endangered North Atlantic right whale and larval lobsters. When the copepods descend into deep waters to hibernate, they typically store 70% or more lipids (left). With rising water temperatures throughout the year, they don’t need as much fat to survive and in turn are skinnier (right). This means larval lobsters and right whales may not be getting enough nutrients year over year.
My original plan was to visit the most spectacular locations I had dived in decades past—places like Eastport, Maine, where the extreme tides of Passamaquoddy Bay exchange water and nutrients multiple times a day. I remembered Eastport as a cold-water kaleidoscope of fish species and invertebrates that could be seen easily just by making a dive from the beach. But when I got there, it was like a ghost town. The abundance of life that I had seen before was gone. Where exotic-looking creatures once carpeted the bottom, now there was only mud. Water temperatures were noticeably warmer.
The singular mix of elements that made the Gulf of Maine a fertile oasis is the reason it is now warming faster than almost anywhere else. These waters are also a harbinger for what the rest of the world might see. According to Charles Tilburg (2), an oceanographer and the director of marine and environmental programs at the University of New England, the gulf works “like a bathtub: If you turn down the cold water and turn up the hot water, the bathtub’s going to get warmer.” Tilburg has spent about 15 years tracking how the frigid Labrador Current is weakening, providing less cold water to the gulf, while the hotter Gulf Stream is shifting slightly north and adding warmer water to the region.
— (2) More than 60 rivers flow into the Gulf of Maine, adding water that is on average warmer than the ocean, Tilburg explains. Meanwhile, the region’s relatively shallow waters also absorb atmospheric heat.
But despite the collective stresses of overfishing and climate change, there are some species that have benefited, if only temporarily.
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Top: Two lobsters fight over a burrow near the Isles of Shoals.The species has been booming, and typical rocky shelters—where lobster predators also lurk—are becoming overcrowded.
Bottom: A common tern tries to feed its chick a butterfish, but the offering is too wide to swallow. Butterfish now outnumber the slender silverfish that terns favor, such as herring and sand lance.
So far, temperatures in the Gulf of Maine have stayed suitable for lobster reproduction—the lobster-fishing industry appears to be flourishing. But scientists have identified some troubling changes. When temperatures rise to more than 73 degrees Fahrenheit near the coast, female lobsters stay farther offshore, where offspring they release might not intersect with currents that can carry them to the food sources and habitats that are more conducive to survival. These so-called larval lobsters eat zooplankton. Their preferred prey is Calanus, a two-to-three-millimeter copepod that is made up of mostly fat to sustain them through the winter. David Fields (3), a professor of oceanography at Bigelow Laboratory for Ocean Sciences, calls it “the French butter of copepods,” good for bulking up little lobsters.
— (3) Fields has found that copepods are 73 percent lipids, providing critical nutrition for the animals that eat them. These zooplankton are crucial to the survival of not just lobsters; they’re the primary food for endangered North Atlantic right whales.
As the water warms, Calanus copepods no longer need as much fat and grow smaller. That means the baby lobsters lose out on nutrition. Additionally, the warming water has shifted the Calanus’s migration period, which is putting it out of sync with the release of larval lobsters. So even though female lobsters are producing the same number of eggs as before, fewer are surviving into adulthood. In 2023, Maine saw the lowest lobster haul in 15 years, mimicking what’s been happening off the coasts of New York, Connecticut, and Rhode Island.
There’s more bad news for lobsters. The same carbon emissions behind climate change affect not only the ocean’s temperature but also its chemistry. The water is becoming more acidic. Fields says anything with a calcium exoskeleton or chitinous shell, from coral reefs to copepods, can get eroded by such acidification. It could potentially threaten a young lobster’s fragile exoskeleton in 10 or 20 years.
Other disturbing trends have surfaced. Win Watson (4), a marine biologist and emeritus professor at the University of New Hampshire, has studied the changing pH that may endanger lobsters’ ability to smell. That could make it harder for them to find food, detect predators, or sense each other’s pheromones during mating season, which has already gotten more difficult because female lobsters prefer colder temperatures, while males are fine in warmer water. Mates are literally drifting apart.
— (4) Watson has published dozens of scientific papers about lobster biology. Over the years, his research group used ultrasonic tracking, underwater video, and acoustic monitoring to study how lobsters move across the ocean floor and communicate with one another.
On this ocean planet, what happens underwater clearly has consequences on land. For example, the changes occurring with fish populations in the Gulf of Maine are having a direct impact on seabirds. Tern parents see silver fish reflecting sunlight in the ocean and bring them back to their chicks. When parents hunt their typical prey, such as hake or herring, the hatchlings can swallow these slender, silver fish easily. But as the water warms, terns can choose their prey from a larger range of silver fish such as the wider-bodied butterfish, which have shifted north from the mid-Atlantic.
Though some adult birds still find appropriate prey, to many, a silver fish may simply be a silver fish. Elizabeth Craig (5), director of seabird research at the Shoals Marine Laboratory, which is largely funded by the New Hampshire Fish and Game Department, has found that the chicks are unable to swallow the butterfish. They’re not getting enough food, and many remain smaller and either die before they leave the nest or are too weak to migrate.
— (5) Craig recently published a paper showing how butterfish migration, because of warming oceans, appears to be having an impact on tern chick survival: Nearly 80 percent of the butterfish delivered to chicks by their parents don’t get eaten.
It’s a poignant reinforcement of what we already know: Ocean ecosystems are in decline. I’m seeing dramatic ecological changes that should take millions of years, and yet they’re happening in my lifetime. But there are success stories. Plenty of evidence shows that when we permanently protect places in the ocean, remove obstacles, and give marine life a chance, nature finds a way: It is resilient, and it can heal. But nature needs a little help.
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Among the marvels that still exist within the Gulf of Maine are gray seals. One approached photographer Brian Skerry with wide-eyed curiosity during a recent dive at the Isles of Shoals.
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On other dives in the region, Skerry encountered wondrous creatures, including a species of filamentous nudibranch, or sea slug (Top) and this bioluminescent lion’s mane jellyfish (Bottom).
The Alewife Is One Story of Hope In The Gulf Of Maine. This species of fish is an important source of protein for many animals as it migrates from the freshwater ponds where it spawns to the ocean and then back again. In the ocean and in estuaries, where rivers flow into the sea, alewives are eaten by other fish and by birds such as eagles, ospreys, and cormorants. As they migrate into streams in the forest, they can become food for animals such as raccoons and foxes. Finally arriving at their spawning ponds, they must avoid predators like freshwater bass. Survivors of this gauntlet go back to the ocean, with their fry following a few months later.
Alewives had virtually disappeared from the gulf because dams kept them from migrating. The removal of dams in key rivers such as the Penobscot and Presumpscot, done largely in hopes of restoring Atlantic salmon populations, resulted in the revival of the alewife’s ancient migratory route; runs of fish in the millions now occur every spring. One beautiful experience I’ve had in recent years was photographing alewives at the base of a waterfall in Mill Brook Preserve, a tributary of the Presumpscot. The fish gather there to rest before going up the falls. Lying with my camera in only two feet of water, I was surrounded by thousands of alewives swirling around me, the way I imagine the river would have been long ago.
Perhaps the most special place I have explored in this region is Cashes Ledge, a unique underwater mountain range in the middle of the Gulf of Maine. Jon Witman (6), a marine ecologist at Brown University, calls it a time machine to when the gulf was packed with marine life.
— (6) Witman is the lead scientist on the effort to achieve permanent conservation protection for Cashes Ledge, in partnership with Conservation Law Foundation.
As Witman has documented, Cashes has one of every kind of offshore or subtidal marine habitat that exists off the coast of New England, with species rarely seen elsewhere. Because of the ledge’s submerged rocky ridges, waves and currents push large amounts of plankton to the creatures that eat it; Witman says it’s like a food elevator.
In order for climate stability to even be possible, researchers say, we need to protect a minimum of 30 percent of key habitats in the ocean. Today only about 8 percent are formally protected. For Witman, who has been studying Cashes since the 1970s, designating the area as a marine sanctuary feels more urgent than ever. By protecting it, we would help ensure healthy fishery stocks in the future. The fish biomass in Cashes is 300 times that on the coast; animals that live there obviously don’t just stay in one place, so they propagate and spill over.
Cashes also contains the largest kelp forest off the coast of the eastern United States. That’s important because kelp serves as both the base of the food chain and a distinct ecosystem. As a diver, I’ve marveled at the vastness of this amber- and crimson-colored forest swaying so far beneath the surface. For his part, Witman compares the underwater journey to Cashes to a drive through the plains of Iowa for hundreds of miles and coming across a huge mountain with a forest. And like the woods on land, kelp forests capture carbon. The ocean is the greatest carbon sink on our planet, and its phytoplankton give us every other breath that we draw.
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Top Left: A cunner hovers amid several large kelp fronds at Cashes Ledge, a marine area that researchers have identified as a vital sanctuary and hedge against climate change. Cashes’s kelp forest, which supports marine life while absorbing carbon from the ocean, is the largest off the coast of the eastern United States.
Top Right: Seafood harvesters with Bangs Islands Mussels have been raising blue mussels in Maine’s Casco Bay for more than a decade. The mollusks are grown on vertical lines that are attached to a raft and can be winched up for cleaning and sorting. Only those of a certain—larger—size are kept for sale, while the rest are returned to the water.
Bottom: Seafood harvesters with Bangs Islands Mussels have been raising blue mussels in Maine’s Casco Bay for more than a decade. The mollusks are grown on vertical lines that are attached to a raft and can be winched up for cleaning and sorting. Only those of a certain—larger—size are kept for sale, while the rest are returned to the water.
Exactly how big a role kelp plays in that process is being studied by scientists like Douglas Rasher (7) of Bigelow Laboratory for Ocean Sciences. He has spent nearly 10 years studying coastal kelp forests from the southern tip of Maine to its northern borders with Canada and documented their steady decline.
— (7) Rasher has found that warming seawater temperatures result in an invasive red “turf” that replaces habitats as kelp dwindles. This kind of underwater deforestation destroys healthy ecosystems.
Rasher’s research also shows just how fast things continue to change. He’s seen some study sites shift from a forested to deforested state in the span of a five-year research grant.
One Of The Ways Fishers have sought to mitigate potential economic damage from native species decline is by transitioning into new and sustainable ventures. Colleen Francke grew up on Cape Cod inspired by women in the fishing business. After a back injury ended her 10-year lobstering career, she launched Summit Point Seafood to grow kelp, which has a lower cost barrier than mussels or oysters. Francke submerges long lines seeded with kelp in the fall, then in spring sells the harvest to companies that make products like veggie burgers or that use the superfood to provide nutrients and a salt alternative to traditionally kelp-free fare like bread.
Another operation, Bangs Island Mussels, a family business in Casco Bay off the coast of Portland, farms kelp in conjunction with growing mussels. The company uses a method known as integrated multitrophic aquaculture, which allows these two species to grow in harmony with each other. It has a series of large rafts offshore equipped with vertical lines seeded with mussel spat—the scientific term for tiny juveniles—that will mature and be harvested for sale to restaurant wholesalers and distributors. Going out on the water with the Bangs Island harvesters was like watching craftspeople create something beautiful with their hands. The operations produce a renewable resource that may actually be beneficial to the environment.
Co-owner and CEO Matt Moretti is concerned that it will become harder for mussels to survive long enough to grow their shells in the wild because of ocean acidification. Bangs Island Mussels is developing nursery technology at its indoor facility for baby mussels, so that they have the best chance of surviving their vulnerable pre-shell period. Mussels can grow in captivity until their exteriors are thick enough to handle a more acidic ocean.
Meanwhile, some fishers are diversifying by looking to create new markets for species that have not traditionally been commercially harvested. A couple of my neighbors, Sam Sewall and Mike Masi, have teamed up to build a green crab business called Shell+Claw. Green crabs, an invasive species, live mostly in estuaries.
Green crabs were introduced into the Gulf of Maine in the 1800s, brought in by the ballast water of ships. Until recently, their population was kept in check because of the cold winters, but with climate change yielding milder temperatures, their numbers have exploded. They dig into the mud and cut off the roots of eelgrass, which captures nitrogen and carbon and acts as a nursery for estuarine species, and smooth cordgrass, which critically stabilizes riverbanks and fights erosion.
Green crabs also eat clams, historically the second or third most valuable fishery in Maine. Shell+Claw’s business idea is to mitigate the damage caused by green crabs while creating another source of income for its partners who are willing to experiment. Working with researchers, Masi has started to figure out when the crabs molt, thus becoming soft-shell crabs that are edible. The goal is to mimic what’s being done in Venice, Italy, where a similar type of crab is sold as a delicacy. Masi, a former marine biology teacher at the local high school, says harvesting these crabs is probably always going to be a supplemental business for fishers. But clam prices are at their lowest when green crabs are molting in late spring, so the venture can dovetail economically and give clams a chance to recover their population.
When the shedding begins, Masi and Sewall—a 27-year-old former student of Masi’s and fourth-generation lobsterman—immediately take the soft-shell green crabs to high-end seafood places in Boston and Portsmouth, New Hampshire, that are paying a premium to fry them up as sliders or tempura.
So perhaps there is hope for the Gulf of Maine. As I continue to explore these waters, I am troubled by much that I see; the warning signs mirror obvious trends in scientific data. I often think about what the Native tribes—the Wampanoag, Abenaki, Passamaquoddy, and Mi’kmaq—must have seen long ago, and I dream about traveling back in time, hundreds of years, to dive in those waters teeming with life.
Although we have lost so much over the centuries and are facing serious threats today, I still find magic in the Gulf of Maine. My hope is that, armed with the knowledge of the past and the science of today, we can save what remains. And allow it to rebound.
— An Explorer since 2014, Brian Skerry first dived in the Gulf of Maine more than 40 years ago. In this issue, he shares how the area has become a harbinger of climate change. Skerry has contributed more than 30 features to the magazine. His last story was “Secrets of the Whales” in 2021, which accompanied the Emmy Award–winning documentary series that he produced. It’s available to stream on Disney+.
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redemptioninterlude · 2 years
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“I’m coasting on potential, towards a wall, at a hundred miles an hour.” for alice !
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fall out boy meme ( no longer accepting ) + @marchellas // marchella ( mentions of @madaeson and @sleepbreathe )
They don't meet for tea this time! The March Hare comes to Alice, or rather, where Alice lays on Marchie's floor, a temporary home made out of her lovely little hole because, WHERE ELSE would Alice go? Here! There! But right now, with March. Isn't that grand and lovely and swell? Flittering about like the little butterfly she was, she startles, keenly, from the book she reads as the door opens and there! There is the woman of the hour, Marchella Lapine, Alice up and thrown within her arms in an instant.
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"Oh it was dreadfully dull without you here!" as if she hadn't gotten a mission of the most important sort from the Hatter. Oh Madison, Madison, Madison, Madison! It's only a sad surprise to find that she hasn't followed the Hare to come home, a pout on her lips for it. "I thought I'd get to see this place bright and in full force with the Hatter to COME VISIT! But.." a cheek pressed to cheek, a sigh all nosily made. "You're more than enough. Shall we have our own little celebration tonight? I thought to try to make crepes but I realised you've no cream and then I thought, hmmm~ do we ask Dori to come and make a treacle pie? There's so many options!" a mad giggle tumbles, and she waits, squeezing the small March Hare with great affection.
“I’m coasting on potential, towards a wall, at a hundred miles an hour.”
A frown from Alice, a shake of her head. "HOW MOROSE!" oh no, no, no! That simply would not do. "There's no grand crash waiting for you. Unless it's into bed of course! Please don't let yourself get all swept away by bad thoughts. We've a party to plan! Who caused this." there's something sharper, deeper, in the lull of her voice. "Who's come and pried apart your heart, sweet Marchie?"
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expectingtofly · 3 years
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finally free, they drive
2k
day 1 of @thiscastielhasflown and i's follower celebration
prompt: diners/roadtrip
Twenty-four years ago in Mankato, Minnesota, Dean killed a wendigo with a bottle of Jack and a lighter. He told Cas this, how the flames lit the inside of the cave and his dad had to drag him out because he suddenly couldn’t move, how he stayed silent for a week even though his dad begged him to speak.
Seventeen years ago, in Monte Vista, Colorado, Dean burned the bones of a malevolent spirit that sliced a gash through his chest before he could swing an iron crowbar through her foggy figure. As he and Cas passed by the cemetery where he and his dad had dug up her remains, he could almost picture himself standing between the tombstones, his dad tossing him the lighter. Do the honors.
In Evanston, Wyoming, he and Cas stopped to eat at a diner that looked vaguely familiar. As they sat down at a booth in the back, waitress handing them their menus, it hit him.
“Pretty sure Sam and I went through here before.” He couldn’t remember what they'd been hunting. “Years ago. After dad. You know. Passed.”
And Cas was silent a moment before replying, "I wish I’d known you then."
Then he declared he wanted the French onion soup from the specials of the day, like he hadn’t just spoken Dean's thoughts aloud in his uncanny way of knowing exactly what Dean wished for before Dean knew it himself.
Sometimes, while passing semi-trailer trucks on the freeway, when the setting sun glinted off the metal partition between west and east-headed traffic, he wondered what life would’ve been like if he knew Cas when he was twenty-six. When he was so lonely, his chest felt like a vise at night, and he slipped out of mildewed motel rooms to gasp in chilly night air. When he sought out crowded bars because accidental nudges and jostles were substitutes for caresses.
What might’ve changed if he'd known Cas when he was twenty-two, when Sam left for college and Dad left with a cutting, Don't look for me. If, confronted with an angel then, he would’ve been able to believe in good things, if he would've kissed him to not feel so alone.
The radio played Dolly Parton at a diner in Des Moines, a young couple sat at the counter, Cas stacked small containers of strawberry jelly and orange marmalade into a tower, and Dean imagined sitting across from him when he was nineteen. But then Cas looked up at him triumphantly over perfectly balanced preserves, and the what-if's dissolved in a growing warmth in his chest. Cas had been right after all. Good things did happen.
They drove without a destination now that they didn’t need one, changing course frequently, turning off exits to follow signs for roadside attractions, homestyle meals, and scenic overlooks.
Prairie and forest, coast and desert. He'd traveled these roads before, but he was paying attention now. Everything looked different with Cas sitting by his side, when every glance to his right revealed Cas already looking at him.
Re-heated diner leftovers and slices of pie for breakfast, crumbs on the bed, brown bags in the backseat, lunch breaks at rest stops, sitting on the hood to unwrap grease-stained burger wrappers, kept warm from the sun coming through the car’s windows.
Baby had been his home for years. He'd learned her nooks, her curves, how best to settle on the benchseat and tuck his jacket against the door to wake without a crick in his neck.
Moving into the bunker, he'd claimed a room, made a space for every item he owned: a hook for every weapon, a box for every photo, a hanger for every jacket. The concrete walls and sterile bathrooms meant order, control.
He used to be afraid that if he let one item fall out of place, he'd lose his grip on the delicate thread which held him together.
Crackling radio in Omaha, searching for a station. Cassette-tapes pulled out of a box that he hadn’t rifled through since a time when angels were still a myth, god didn’t exist, and death was always close, but not someone they knew by name. Black Sabbath, Motorhead, Metallica. Then, out of Cas' pocket, his own “Top 13 Zepp Traxxs,” which he was surprised to learn Cas still kept, the words on the label faded.
“It was a gift,” Cas said, tucking the cassette into the deck and turning up the volume.
Busy diners where their food took ages to come to their table and Dean doodled on napkins to pass the time. Stuffed them into his pocket and forgot until he pulled them out while looking for change to pay for gas. A tiny Impala, a sun with dashes for rays, sigils, tiny flowers which Cas had added to the corners.
An argument on I-70 and sixty-two miles of tense silence. "If you don't speak to me, I can't understand," Cas said, voice quiet under the whir of tires on the road.
Dean changed lanes, watched a tarp flap over the bed of a pick-up truck. "I don't know how," he admitted.
Cas let out a breath that sounded like relief. "We'll learn."
He learned Cas liked brightly colored shirts labeled with the names of locations they visited, oversized because tight sleeves made him itch. He learned that the strangely named items on diner menus had backstories that owners behind counters were all too eager to share when Cas prompted them. He learned Cas hovered in doorways as if he was waiting to be invited inside, learned Cas knew every upbeat song playing over the radio in gas stations, had nightmares too, could stay silent for seventy miles then speak a thought aloud that left Dean stunned for seventy more.
He taught Cas how to pass the time on roads that stretched to the horizon. Name a movie for every letter of the alphabet. Name three items you'd take to a deserted island. Name everyone we've lost along the way—he didn't mean to begin talking about them, but they seemed closer than ever before on the open road, under a vast, cloudless sky. The wind whisked their names from their mouths, and Dean liked the idea of them still existing, here, around them.
A map open on his lap, Cas circled every town they stopped at, traced their route with a red pen. Folded and unfolded the page until the creases made the snaking lines nearly illegible. "I want to remember," he told Dean, and Dean traced the creases to feel their route under his finger. The steering wheel was warm under his palms, the diner floors sticky under his boots, the motel sheets stiff when he pulled them back from the headboard, and he told Cas, "Pinch me," in the dark of an eighty-dollar-a-night room. Cas touched his face and kissed him instead.
The rocky coast off of Oregon delighted Cas. He rolled up his pant legs, clutched Dean's hand as they walked unsteadily over the slippery rocks to step into the Pacific Ocean. The wind whipped his hair over his face and he pushed back the strands, grinning back at Dean. Sometimes at night, when Cas slept curled into him, Dean looked at the photo he'd taken of him and wished he had a place of their own to frame it.
Long phone calls to family and friends who told them to take their time, do not disturb signs hung on motel doorknobs, winding backroads and detours. He grew out his hair and told Cas he needed a cut. Cas twisted his fingers through the strands, and mused, "I like it." Dean kept it and noticed the strands curled at the ends.
A sign on the highway in Ohio read, "Hell is Real." He still had nightmares. As cornfields passed, Cas recounted seeing his soul for the first time, and sometimes Dean imagined he remembered the safety of Cas' wings as he pulled him out of the depths of Hades.
Cas got sick in Idaho, complained, voice echoing in the toilet bowl, "I told you that diner was not sanitary." Dean rubbed his back and told him he'd write a scathing review. In West Virginia, over a pile of spilled salt and stale fries that were probably nuked behind the counter, Cas told him he loved him. It wasn't for the first time, but his breath still caught in his throat.
They ate fried okra in Oklahoma City, beignets in New Orleans, and Dean requested Earth Angel on a jukebox in a vinyl and chrome diner in Wisconsin. Slid into the booth to press against Cas' side and watch him fill out postcards. Did you know dinosaurs once roamed where the Rockies now stand? Don't know when we'll be back. We bought new cassettes to add to the collection and I convinced Dean to let me choose the music. Still so much we haven't seen.
The magic fingers bed at the King's Court Motel cost four quarters for fifteen minutes—three more than when he was younger, he griped to Cas. The vibrating massage didn't seem quite as relaxing as he remembered, but maybe he was just used to more magical fingers—this he accompanied with an exaggerated wink which made Cas roll his eyes.
The Impala broke down on Route 66, and the asphalt radiated heat as he ducked under the hood. Cas hovered at his side and he realized he didn't have the tools to fix her.
They ate lunch at a mom-and-pop’s restaurant as they waited for the mechanic to finish, and Cas gave him the pickle from his sandwich. "I'm sorry I never asked you to stay," Dean told him and wished he'd said it earlier. "I never wanted you to leave."
Cas gave him a sad smile. "It's in the past." He tapped his foot against Dean's under the table, and Dean hooked his ankle with his foot.
Cas parted the curtains in every motel they slept in, tilted his face to the sun beaming through the windshield, urged Dean to stop for a cardboard sign reading Fresh Strawberries $2. Reruns of The Three Stooges made Dean laugh until he wiped tears from the corners of his eyes, had to catch his breath. This happiness didn't seem so fragile, this time. When they turned on the TV tomorrow night three hundred miles away, The Three Stooges would play into the morning, and when he told Cas he loved him, Cas would say it back.
Crossing over rippling water or curving through wooded land, he and Cas spoke a cabin in the woods, a house on the coast, a home. Dean's head filled with the future instead of the past. Every mile that passed under their tires brought them closer to this dream—or so he thought, until he stopped at a red light, and Cas took his hand, and he realized home sat beside him now.
In a diner in Arkansas, Cas read from a menu, plastic corners curling, and commented, "No matter where we go, every place serves an iceberg wedge salad."
Dean replied, "I think I'm ready to stop driving."
He didn't know where they'd park the Impala for good, but he pictured somewhere with windows, patches of sunlight on the floor. The details didn't matter so much, though, not so long as he had Cas.
"For you to me are the only one," he sang over Robert Plant, glancing at Cas as he turned up the radio, wind whistling through the open windows, road humming under their feet. Happiness, no more be sad, happiness, I'm glad.
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niseamstories · 4 years
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10 Lessons on Realistic Worldbuilding and Mapmaking I Learned Working With a Professional Cartographer and Geodesist
Hi, fellow writers and worldbuilders,
It’s been over a year since my post on realistic swordfighting, and I figured it’s time for another one. I’m guessing the topic is a little less “sexy”, but I’d find this useful as a writer, so here goes: 10 things I learned about realistic worldbuilding and mapmaking while writing my novel.
I’ve always been a sucker for pretty maps, so when I started on my novel, I hired an artist quite early to create a map for me. It was beautiful, but a few things always bothered me, even though I couldn’t put a finger on it. A year later, I met an old friend of mine, who currently does his Ph.D. in cartography and geodesy, the science of measuring the earth. When the conversation shifted to the novel, I showed him the map and asked for his opinion, and he (respectfully) pointed out that it has an awful lot of issues from a realism perspective.
First off, I’m aware that fiction is fiction, and it’s not always about realism; there are plenty of beautiful maps out there (and my old one was one of them) that are a bit fantastical and unrealistic, and that’s all right. Still, considering the lengths I went to ensure realism for other aspects of my worldbuilding, it felt weird to me to simply ignore these discrepancies. With a heavy heart, I scrapped the old map and started over, this time working in tandem with a professional artist, my cartographer friend, and a linguist. Six months later, I’m not only very happy with the new map, but I also learned a lot of things about geography and coherent worldbuilding, which made my universe a lot more realistic.
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1)  Realism Has an Effect: While there’s absolutely nothing wrong with creating an unrealistic world, realism does affect the plausibility of a world. Even if the vast majority of us probably know little about geography, our brains subconsciously notice discrepancies; we simply get this sense that something isn’t quite right, even if we don’t notice or can’t put our finger on it. In other words, if, for some miraculous reason, an evergreen forest borders on a desert in your novel, it will probably help immersion if you at least explain why this is, no matter how simple.
2)  Climate Zones: According to my friend, a cardinal sin in fantasy maps are nonsensical climate zones. A single continent contains hot deserts, forests, and glaciers, and you can get through it all in a single day. This is particularly noticeable in video games, where this is often done to offer visual variety (Enderal, the game I wrote, is very guilty of this). If you aim for realism, run your worldbuilding by someone with a basic grasp of geography and geology, or at least try to match it to real-life examples.
3)  Avoid Island Continent Worlds: Another issue that is quite common in fictional worlds is what I would call the “island continents”: a world that is made up of island-like continents surrounded by vast bodies of water. As lovely and romantic as the idea of those distant and secluded worlds may be, it’s deeply unrealistic. Unless your world was shaped by geological forces that differ substantially from Earth’s, it was probably at one point a single landmass that split up into fragmented landmasses separated by waters. Take a look at a proper map of our world: the vast majority of continents could theoretically be reached by foot and relatively manageable sea passages. If it weren’t so, countries such as Australia could have never been colonized – you can’t cross an entire ocean on a raft.
4)  Logical City Placement: My novel is set in a Polynesian-inspired tropical archipelago; in the early drafts of the book and on my first map, Uunili, the nation’s capital, stretched along the entire western coast of the main island. This is absurd. Not only because this city would have been laughably big, but also because building a settlement along an unprotected coastline is the dumbest thing you could do considering it directly exposes it to storms, floods, and, in my case, monsoons. Unless there’s a logical reason to do otherwise, always place your coastal settlements in bays or fjords.
 Naturally, this extends to city placement in general. If you want realism and coherence, don’t place a city in the middle of a godforsaken wasteland or a swamp just because it’s cool. There needs to be a reason. For example, the wasteland city could have started out as a mining town around a vast mineral deposit, and the swamp town might have a trading post along a vital trade route connecting two nations.
 5)  Realistic Settlement Sizes: As I’ve mentioned before, my capital Uunili originally extended across the entire western coast. Considering Uunili is roughly two thirds the size of Hawaii  the old visuals would have made it twice the size of Mexico City. An easy way to avoid this is to draw the map using a scale and stick to it religiously. For my map, we decided to represent cities and townships with symbols alone.
 6)  Realistic Megacities: Uunili has a population of about 450,000 people. For a city in a Middle Ages-inspired era, this is humongous. While this isn’t an issue, per se (at its height, ancient Alexandria had a population of about 300,000), a city of that size creates its own set of challenges: you’ll need a complex sewage system (to minimize disease spreading like wildfire) and strong agriculture in the surrounding areas to keep the population fed. Also, only a small part of such a megacity would be enclosed within fantasy’s ever-so-present colossal city walls; the majority of citizens would probably concentrate in an enormous urban sprawl in the surrounding areas. To give you a pointer, with a population of about 50,000, Cologne was Germany’s biggest metropolis for most of the Middle Ages. I’ll say it again: it’s fine to disregard realism for coolness in this case, but at least taking these things into consideration will not only give your world more texture but might even provide you with some interesting plot points.
 7)  World Origin: This point can be summed up in a single question: why is your world the way it is? If your novel is set in an archipelago like mine is, are the islands of volcanic origin? Did they use to be a single landmass that got flooded with the years? Do the inhabitants of your country know about this? Were there any natural disasters to speak of? Yes, not all of this may be relevant to the story, and the story should take priority over lore, but just like with my previous point, it will make your world more immersive.
 8)  Maps: Think Purpose! Every map in history had a purpose. Before you start on your map, think about what yours might have been. Was it a map people actually used for navigation? If so, clarity should be paramount. This means little to no distracting ornamentation, a legible font, and a strict focus on relevant information. For example, a map used chiefly for military purposes would naturally highlight different information than a trade map. For my novel, we ultimately decided on a “show-off map” drawn for the Blue Island Coalition, a powerful political entity in the archipelago (depending on your world’s technology level, maps were actually scarce and valuable). Also, think about which technique your in-universe cartographer used to draw your in-universe map. Has copperplate engraving already been invented in your fictional universe? If not, your map shouldn’t use that aesthetic.
9)  Maps: Less Is More. If a spot or an area on a map contains no relevant information, it can (and should) stay blank so that the reader’s attention naturally shifts to the critical information. Think of it this way: if your nav system tells you to follow a highway for 500 miles, that’s the information you’ll get, and not “in 100 meters, you’ll drive past a little petrol station on the left, and, oh, did I tell you about that accident that took place here ten years ago?” Traditional maps follow the same principle: if there’s a road leading a two day’s march through a desolate desert, a black line over a blank white ground is entirely sufficient to convey that information.
10) Settlement and Landmark Names: This point will be a bit of a tangent, but it’s still relevant. I worked with a linguist to create a fully functional language for my novel, and one of the things he criticized about my early drafts were the names of my cities. It’s embarrassing when I think about it now, but I really didn’t pay that much attention to how I named my cities; I wanted it to sound good, and that was it. Again: if realism is your goal, that’s a big mistake. Like Point 5, we went back to the drawing board and dove into the archipelago’s history and established naming conventions. In my novel, for example, the islands were inhabited by indigenes called the Makehu before the colonization four hundred years before the events of the story; as it’s usually the case, all settlements and islands had purely descriptive names back then. For example, the main island was called Uni e Li, which translates as “Mighty Hill,” a reference to the vast mountain ranges in the south and north; townships followed the same example (e.g., Tamakaha meaning “Coarse Sands”). When the colonizers arrived, they adopted the Makehu names and adapted them into their own language, changing the accented, long vowels to double vowels: Uni e Li became “Uunili,” Lehō e Āhe became “Lehowai.” Makehu townships kept their names; colonial cities got “English” monikers named after their geographical location, economic significance, or some other original story. Examples of this are Southport, a—you guessed it—port on the southernmost tip of Uunili, or Cale’s Hope, a settlement named after a businessman’s mining venture. It’s all details, and chances are that most readers won’t even pay attention, but I personally found that this added a lot of plausibility and immersion.
I could cover a lot more, but this post is already way too long, so I’ll leave it at that—if there’s enough interest, I’d be happy to make a part two. If not, well, maybe at least a couple of you got something useful out of this. If you’re looking for inspiration/references to show to your illustrator/cartographer, the David Rumsey archive is a treasure trove. Finally, for anyone who doesn’t know and might be interested, my novel is called Dreams of the Dying, and is a blends fantasy, mystery, and psychological horror set in the universe of Enderal, an indie RPG for which I wrote the story. It’s set in a Polynesian-inspired medieval world and has been described as Inception in a fantasy setting by reviewers.
Credit for the map belongs to Dominik Derow, who did the ornamentation, and my friend Fabian Müller, who created the map in QGIS and answered all my questions with divine patience. The linguist’s name is David Müller (no, they’re not related, and, yes, we Germans all have the same last names.)
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nightingaelic · 3 years
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could you do Fallout New Vegas companion’s reactions to a Courier Six who is also the Lone Wanderer telling their stories from their time in DC? (bonus points for Arcade’s reaction to them hating the enclave, and if that would make him decide to keep his past hidden even longer, or if he would still tell them?)
The logistics and implications of this make my head spin. This is also super long, honestly I should just quit writing reacts and start writing fics OH WAIT
Getting the courier talking was a tough thing to do, but on nights where the moon was full and the coyotes' howls were miles away or at least behind some stout walls, on nights where they were a few beers in and they hadn't seen another living soul in a few days, that Mojave Express deliverer started to reminisce. That wasn't really the surprising part, though. No, the surprising part was what they would remember, fondly or not-so-fondly: A world apart from the desert, a continent away on another coast, and stories of life in a vault, a missing father, pure water and a Brotherhood divided.
Arcade Gannon: Arcade didn't mind these moods, at least when they first cropped up. He nodded along as the courier talked about living in their father's shadow, about feeling cornered by their own family's legacy. He hung on their words about living in the cradle of America's history, about Project Purity, all of the gritty details of modifying a GECK to bring water to a devastated wasteland.
Eventually though, the courier's memories soured, with the arrival of Enclave remnants in their life. Arcade folded into himself with every harsh word, every jolt of plasma that had disrupted his friend's world relived in horrific detail. They gestured angrily as they described their newfound purpose, their battle for power with the fractured Brotherhood of Steel at their back, and their smug satisfaction at the moments they were able to crack open Raven Rock and the Enclave's mobile base crawler and lay waste to their tormentors.
It took a few rounds of these stories before the courier noticed he shrank and grew quiet whenever they neared the end of their story about breaking into another vault to find the GECK. They stopped abruptly one night. "What's up with you?"
"Um..." Arcade scratched the back of his neck and looked away. "Nothing. Nothing, I just... have some personal experience with the Enclave, myself."
The courier sighed. "Yeah, there's a few people walking around the West Coast that have similar stories to mine. Arroyo's full of them, for one. Is it something like that?"
Arcade took a deep breath. "I feel... well, it's a lot closer to home, for me. Close enough to raise questions, so I don't talk about it much."
"Close enough to..." The courier twisted their face up in confusion for a moment, before realization set in and their eyes grew large. "You were... your... oh."
"Mmm-hm."
"Well, fuck me." The courier smiled and popped a cap off of another beer. "I've been doing all the talking, haven't I? Let's hear your story about working with the guys in power armor who ruined my life, right after dad did."
Craig Boone: Whenever the courier started up like this, Boone couldn't help but notice a familiar twinge of regret and self-doubt in their voice. It shone through most clearly when they spoke about their time with the Brotherhood of Steel, the men and women they'd fought alongside and lost during their struggle against the remnants of the Enclave. It was there, too, in their story about returning to the vault they grew up in, setting the chaos that had arisen in their wake to rest, but not being able to go back to the way things were.
Boone didn't pry. He knew that feeling well. Instead, he cracked open bottles of beer, liquor, soda, whatever they had on hand during their nights in the desert, and just listened. He'd done the same for Carla, when they were younger and new to each other and he couldn't get enough of her voice and how it flowed endlessly, easily, the way his never could. He absorbed it all now as he did then: The joy, the pain, the loss, the fear, the triumphs and falls and abandoned dreams that filled the courier up and drove them to travel west, beyond anything they had ever known.
That last part stumped Boone a bit, though. "Why didn't you stay?" he finally asked one night.
They looked surprised. "Stay? Stay where? I didn't have a home anymore."
Boone shook his head. "With the Brotherhood. Or some other settlement."
"Like Megaton?" The courier sighed. "I thought about it. Close to the vault, friendly people, easy work... I guess I just didn't want to wind up... stuck."
They flushed red and looked away from him. Boone knew why they were embarrassed, but he also knew the truth in their words.
Sometimes the courier cried after they had finished, though they did their best to hide it. Boone pretended not to notice. He was pretty sure they knew he was pretending, but he was also pretty sure that pointing it out would be worse than just letting it be an open secret between them. The silence between them endured, but something grew inside it and flourished. Some kind of deeper understanding.
Lily Bowen: The more the courier spoke, the more Lily made connections in her muddled mind. Of course they knew the basic layout of most vaults, they had grown up in one. Of course they were extra-sensitive to the Mojave heat, they had come to the desert from the cooler of the two coasts. Of course they'd been extra-wary around the super mutants or nightkin of Jacobstown, they had only known angry super mutants looking to grow their own numbers through any means necessary.
Their shared experience of growing up inside a vault reminded Lily of happier days, and she often asked questions about Vault 101 during the courier's stories. "Were you sweet on anyone inside your old home?" she asked, with a big smile befitting a proud grandma.
The courier blushed. "That's not very polite, Lily."
"Oh, I'm sorry, dearie."
"No, no it's okay." The courier smiled. "There was a boy who picked on me a lot, but I never figured out whether he did it because he hated me or liked me. His name was Butch. And there was Amata, my childhood friend. She was the daughter of the Overseer."
"Daughter of the Overseer?" Lily grinned. "I'm sure she was a lovely young woman."
The courier looked a little misty. "Yeah. She was. Probably still is."
Lily pulled a handkerchief that used to be a small tablecloth from inside her overalls and handed it over. "Maybe we can go back there together, pumpkin," she offered. "I always wanted to travel to the capital. We can visit your friends, see the sights."
"Yeah, maybe someday." The courier accepted the gift and blew their nose. "I've got some things I need to finish up here before I even think about wandering back east, though."
"Then let's make a list and do our chores," Lily said happily. "Number one?"
"Ohhhh, man." The courier smiled up at her. "I wouldn't even know where to start."
Raul Alfonso Tejada: Raul got a faint smile on his face whenever the courier started up like this, as if their memories reminded him of another place he had come from, another time. While they couldn't have more different backgrounds, pasts- hell, he had several hundred years on the courier, even if they shared the same road today- there was something in the description of the other roads they had walked that made him feel warm on a cold night.
"What's on your mind?" The courier asked him one night, when Raul's smile grew larger than usual.
"Nada, boss," he reassured them. "You're just a good reminder that I can change my mind about the future anytime I'd like. Tell me the one about that radio DJ again."
"Again?" The courier rolled their eyes. "Why? I could tell you a million stories about Underworld and all the ghouls that lived there, but all you want to hear about is Three Dog. You'd probably have more in common with the Underworld folks, honestly."
Raul nodded noncommittally. "Sí, but my favorite stories are about people who had to rise above bad situations and become someone uncommon. Anyone who's able to do that is either fighting for something great or running from something terrible. Sometimes both."
The courier shot him a skeptical look. "Three Dog's holed up in his radio station 24/7, he's not running from anything or out fighting for anything. All that stuff about 'the good fight' is a load of bull."
"Now, now, Six," Raul chastised. "Just because he looks like your average pendejo doesn't mean he isn't doing his part. You even told me his radio show is inspirational for the Capital Wasteland folks."
The courier held their hands up in the air and bobbled them, as if balancing an invisible scale. "The duality of man. Being an average pendejo, or convincing everyone around you that you aren't actually an average pendejo and can pull off miracles."
Raul laughed. "And which one are you, boss?"
"Eh, I'm still figuring it out."
Rose of Sharon Cassidy: Cass was never one for fixating on her own past, but she couldn't help but sympathize with the courier whenever they deigned to add onto their unbelievable story. It was hard enough for her to navigate her own damn life: She couldn't imagine being called upon to steer an entire area's destiny.
After another night of recalling their life inside a vault with their dad, then their unexpected loss of him right after being reunited on the surface, the courier stopped suddenly. "I'm sorry," they said.
Cass paused her swig of precious whiskey. "What?"
"I keep going on and on about my dad, and here you are not knowing what happened to yours."
"Eh." Cass took her drink and waved her hand around until the burning swallow made its way down. "S'loads of people in the wasteland without a clue what happened to their pops. I'm not special. In fact, I'd say it probably hurts a bit more, what happened with yours."
"Well, all the same." The courier sank deeper into their seat and examined their own bottle of spirits. "I feel like an open book, tonight. Anything you want to know about where I came from that I haven't already spilled?"
Cass thought for a moment. "Tribals."
"What about them?"
"Does the East Coast have them? You're not the first traveler I've met from there, but none of you have so much as mentioned any tribals out east."
"Mmm." The courier looked thoughtful. "I guess we do have them, though maybe not in the traditional sense. There's a mess of them in Point Lookout for sure, and at least one tribal group in the Capital Wasteland outright, but beyond that things are more... loose. Fewer intact families, fewer intact homes."
"Huh." Cass took another drink. "Maybe that's where my dad went."
She let the courier stew in the awkward silence for a bit before she grinned and reached out to smack them. "Just kidding. Keep going. I want to hear about that giant robot again."
Veronica Santangelo: Veronica usually sat and listened, spellbound, picturing a chapter of her order that had realized the very thing she kept trying to tell the Elders and made the ultimate sacrifice to follow their hearts anyway.
Well, maybe Elder Owyn Lyons hadn't come to the same realization as her, but he had had a change of heart that split his company and cut them off from almost everyone they had ever known. It had been five years since the High Elders had instituted radio silence toward their East Coast chapter, and so far there had been no attempts to re-establish contact.
Veronica prodded the courier for any info she could get about the Capital Wasteland Brotherhood of Steel. The courier let slip pretty early in their friendship that Elder Owyn Lyons had passed away, which wasn't unexpected. The man was 76 years old, after all. She learned on one particularly emotional night that his daughter, Elder Sarah Lyons, was also dead, something she wasn't sure even the Western Elders were aware of. That memory was clearly painful for the courier though, so Veronica didn't press for details.
"And the Enclave?" the Scribe asked one night, arms wrapped around her knees. "Are they completely gone?"
The courier grew cold. "Yes. I made sure of it."
"Right." Veronica nodded. "So the Brotherhood took over the air force base they were at. It must have been chock-full of tech and resources, if it was the Enclave's last stand."
"It was." The courier sighed and shifted in their seat. "And it woke up some of our brothers and sisters to their original mission in the Capital Wasteland. I thought maybe that selfishness had died with Liberty Prime, but... well, I didn't like it, so I left."
"Mmm, yeah." Veronica nodded again, sympathetically this time. "I know how you feel. Felt."
"Feel," the courier agreed. "I just wish there was more I could've done. Maybe there wasn't anything else, short of seizing power."
"You'd definitely get pushback for that in the Brotherhood," Veronica agreed. "But you might get that chance out here in the broader Mojave."
ED-E: At first, ED-E enjoyed the stories, trumpeting and cooing various beeps at the appropriate moments for emphasis. The one time the courier began badmouthing the Enclave, however, the eyebot waited until they had finished before playing back the first tape that Dr. Whitley had recorded before its trip.
The courier listened to the scientist's words from years ago, deflating slightly as it played out. When the tape had finished, they stood up and checked the eyebot over. "He sent you toward Navarro, huh?"
ED-E beeped affirmation, and the courier sighed. "But Navarro was already gone. I'm sorry. I guess I'm... well, me and the Brotherhood of Steel back east are responsible for your previous master's decision to send you away. Might be responsible for more, too."
ED-E beeped sadly. The courier pressed their forehead against the eyebot's metal dome in apology.
Rex: Well, surprising for most. Rex was not most. As soon as the courier got really into their recollections, Rex usually yawned and went to sleep. He stirred when he felt their hand reach down to scratch the ruff of his neck, or pat the glass dome that held his brain.
"Good dog," the courier said, through the veil of sleep. "You remind me of another pup that used to follow me around."
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lomlwintersoldier · 4 years
Text
“Mine. Mine to Me.”
Word Count: 1494
A/N: jfc I have missed writing- tfatws has reignited my love for marvel and for Bucky so hopefully I can push out a few more oneshots/drabble/chapters in between classes. Although for the time being, I only want to write stories where Tony, Steve, and Natasha still exist :( as far as I care, endgame didn’t happen. 
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This one was inspired by the line from the new Jungle book :)
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97 days.
That’s how long you’d been on this mission, one long, painfully unbroken stretch of time. 97 days without seeing home or any recognizable face except for Natasha’s. And the days seemed to stretch longer and longer as time went on and at this point, you couldn’t wait to leave. 
You’d spend most of the winter in the harsh mountains of Serbia, gathering intel and running supplies to an abandoned factory building that the Avengers hoped to turn into a base. Tony trusted the two of you to shape the compound in his image but, damn, were you tired of it. Thankfully though, you and Natasha were slated to leave today, both of you anxiously waiting to make the journey home. 
“You doing okay, Y/N?” Natasha asks, breaking you out of your thoughts. 
You give her a wounded smile, nodding. “Yeah, I’m okay. Just can’t wait to go home.” 
“Me neither.” She gives your hand a comforting squeeze as she walks off to check the perimeter, ensuring that the building was still abandoned. 
You continue packing up yours and Natasha’s things, although neither of you had brought more than a few changes of clothes and some basic toiletries. HYDRA had taught both of you how to exist on nearly nothing. 
Natasha strides back in as you finish cleaning up and you wordlessly hand her her pack. 
“Let’s head out,” you state. 
She nods and the both of you make the long hike back to the hidden quinjet you’d left 3 months ago. It was about a day's hike from the base because secrecy was of utmost importance to this mission. 
You’re quiet for most of the miles you two walk but it’s not uncomfortable. Both you and Natasha didn’t need long conversations which was why the two of you had become so close. Words flowed like a steady stream between you but both of you understood and felt comfortable in silence as well. 
By the time you reach the jet hidden in a snowy cave, it’s dusk and you’re wiped. The thin air, gusting winds and snow took a lot out of you.  
“8 hours until we’re home, Y/N,” Natasha says, a smile curving her lips and you return her smile.
“I’m sure Bucky missed you as much as you missed him,” she states as if she could read your mind. 
Your heart pangs. Goddamn, you’d missed him over these last three months. “I just can’t wait to see him again.” 
“I know, hun,” her own words colored with longing. This time, you squeeze her hand. 
“Steve missed you too, Nat.”
Her hands clench the joystick and she nods. “I really hope he did.” 
You lean back in your chair, trying to breathe and allow yourself to feel excitement at the thought of coming home, but you were far too cautious and pessimistic to believe that nothing would go wrong in the eight hours it would take to get back to New York. 
You settle into your seat and try to think only of Bucky. Of his musky, earthy scent and the dark strands of hair that brushed your cheeks every time he kissed you. God, you couldn’t wait to kiss him. Your mind drifts to his lips, plump and soft and your heart jumps as you think of how good it would feel to just feel him in your arms again. 
Eventually you drift off into sleep, the dark clouds you’re coasting over not providing enough stimulation for your brain to keep you awake. You don’t know how much time has passed but when you open your eyes again, a sliver of orange glow hangs on the horizon. It’s nearly morning. 
“Want me to take over?” You ask, your voice hoarse and cracking from sleep.
Natasha glances over and you can see the weariness in her eyes as she nods and flicks on the autopilot switch. You take her place and she takes yours, falling asleep within seconds. 
The sun peeks over billowing clouds as you guide the jet through the sky at speeds normal people could only dream of reaching. Resisting the urge to push the plane faster to reach your destination just a few minutes quicker, you decide to focus on the rising sun. 
Finally, after it feels like forever and a day, the New York City skyline begins to poke through the low hanging clouds and you breathe a sigh of relief. So close. 
You take the jet past the city, into the countryside of New York where the compound was. Where home rested. 
“Nat,” you call out softly, gently raising her from her sleep. “We’re home.” 
You exchange excited smiles as both of you see two hulking figures standing on the landing pad, where you guide the plane down. When the wheels touch down you can barely keep yourself from leaping to your feet, but you remember to power the plane down first. Natasha grabs the packs as you unbuckle and you grip each other’s hands when you hit the button to open the doors. 
Bright sunlight suddenly burns your eyes and you quickly shut them, squinting through the rays as you make your way down the steps. As your eyes get used to the brightness, his shape begins to form in your eyeline.
He’s wearing a gray t-shirt, proudly showing off the black and gold arm he’d received from Wakanda and your heart swells. He used to feel such embarrassment over his HYDRA given arm and to see him stand there, so stoically, gives you pride. 
His face splits into a wide grin as he steps toward you. 
“Bucky,” his name falls from your lips in a hushed whisper as he struts over to you. Your own face hurts and you realize it’s because you’re smiling as widely as he is and you lose all composure. 
Your legs pick up in a run and he stops, spreading his muscular, sinewy arms, ready to catch you. You seem to hang in space, so close yet so far, you can hardly believe he’s real. But before you know it, your body slams into his, his arms coiling tightly around you as a hearty laugh escapes his chest. 
“Hey, dol—“ Your lips crash to his, cutting his words off but you don’t care. You’re drunk on the taste of his love. He returns your kiss, fingers splayed across your back as he gently lowers you to the ground. His hands come up to cup your cheeks, deepening the kiss and you feel his need for you beneath the surface, evidenced by how tightly he’s holding you. He missed you as much as you did. 
“God, I missed you so much!” You exclaim against his lips. He pulls back from your lips but keeps his hands cupped around your cheeks. He takes a breath before he responds, savoring the moment as he holds you in his ocean blue gaze before pulling you close again. His head dips into your neck, stubble scratching the tender skin. 
“I missed you too, love,” he murmurs against you as you entwine your fingers in his hair, eyes closed into the sun. 
It’s rays never felt warmer. 
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“So how much did you miss me?” You ask coyly as you gaze into Bucky’s cerulean eyes, fingers twirling lazily in his long locks. His metal hand lightly traces circles on your shoulders as a smirk curves the edge of his lips. 
“I thought I just showed you that,” he chuckles, eyes gesturing to your naked body knowingly. 
“Yeah....yeah I guess you did,” you laugh as you nuzzle in closer to him. 
“I really missed you.” You’ve said the words about a hundred times since you got back, just a few hours ago but it still doesn’t feel real to have him here, so close. 
You wrap your leg around his waist, pressing your chest against his and his arms circle around you, as if he’s shielding you from the outside world; it’s just the two of you, no one else but you and him in this bed and in your minds. It’s as if the rest of the world doesn’t exist. 
“I was just counting the days,” he murmurs into your hair. “I was going crazy by the end of it though.” 
You chuckle, “you didn’t find anyone to keep you warm while I was gone?” 
You ask the question tentatively masked by a joking façade but you fear the answer. The two of you hadn’t had the time to really define the boundaries of your relationship before you’d gone and it was still relatively new. His arms tighten over you. 
“Of course not.” He pulls back to look at your face. “You’re mine. Mine to me.” 
Your heart skips a beat at his words. 
“You’re mine too,” you whisper, leaning forward to kiss his nose. “Mine to me.”
“You’re the only one that has me, baby,” he murmurs. “And you’re the only one I’m ever gonna want.”
A small smile crosses your lips. 
Yours. His. Mine. 
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xofanfics · 3 years
Text
Without Warning - Part IV
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Part I | Part II | Part III | Part IV | Part V
Genre: angst, slight fluff
Pairing: Reader x Mark ft. Doyoung
Word Count: 3k
Summary: You and Doyoung had the best summer you could. Now that he’s hundreds of miles away in college, you have to go through senior year alone. You meet Mark at a time when Doyoung is making you feel like you’re single.
Mark was completely taken aback by the events of the night. You’d kissed him and you held his hand and you brought him into your room. Mark could hardly contain his excitement about having kissed you, touched you, and having been close enough to pick up on your scent. For him it wasn’t sexual. It didn’t have to be and, to be honest, he didn’t want it to be. At least, not right now. For now, he was just enjoying this innocence with you.
You went in your drawers and pulled out pajamas, sending Mark into anxiety. Please don’t change in front of me, please don’t change in front of me, he thought. The last thing he needed was to get hard right now and to potentially scare you away. He definitely wasn’t ready for something like that. Thankfully, you excused yourself into the bathroom and returned a couple minutes later with a freshly washed face and pajamas on. 
You looked beautiful as ever, even with no makeup on. He’d seen you a few times without makeup but on most days, he noticed, you’d at least be wearing eyeliner. But here you were, no eyeliner, no mascara, and none of your usual lipgloss with the slight pink tint to it. 
Mark was lying across your bed, heart racing. He was nervous because he’d never seen you in this state and, of course, because he liked you a lot. “You feeling okay?”
You nodded. “Just a little tired. Do you wanna watch my show with me?”
“Yeah. What show?”
“I started rewatching Sailor Moon.”
“I’m down for whatever.” 
You crawled into the bed with him and snuggled up to him, lying on his chest. He wasn’t sure if you could hear his heart racing but it was definitely racing. His heart pounded so hard he could hear it in his ears. He didn’t know if it was because he’d been drinking or what; he just knew that he was very aware of himself right now. Was he breathing too hard? Was he breathing at all? Did he still smell like alcohol? Did you actually like him, the same way he did? He had so many questions and most of them, he couldn’t answer at the moment.
One minute you were watching tv in silence and the next minute, you were asleep. Mark looked down at you and smiled at how cute you looked with your mouth slightly open. He wished he had this view all the time. With a sigh, he thought about all the things you could do if you were his. But for now, he caressed your hand as you slept. He stayed like that with you for the rest of the episode before he figured he shouldn’t overstay his welcome. He scooted from underneath you but before he could get out of the bed you reached out for him, grabbing onto his arm.
“Don’t go,” you mumbled.
“What?”
You opened your eyes and pouted. “Cuddle with me…”
Mark’s heart started racing again but he did what you asked. Plus, how could he resist when you made a face like that. He got under the blanket with you and pulled you closer. You snuggled up to him and said, “Goodnight.” Mark smiled and wrapped his arms around you. And with you in his arms, he fell asleep more quickly than he normally would. 
*
“Y/N?”
Mark shot up, realizing that he probably should’ve asked you when and if your mom was coming back home. He looked down at you, still fast asleep. Should he hide under the bed? In the closet? He heard footsteps coming toward the closed door. Mark bolted into the closet, hoping that the door wasn’t the kind that would squeak as you opened it. Thankfully, it didn’t and he closed the door just enough. He took in a deep breath, praying that your mom had no reason to look in the closet.
“Y/N?” your mom said. She opened the door and Mark heard your mattress shift from outside the closet. 
“Hey,” you said. He heard you yawn loudly. He couldn’t see you but he imagined it in his mind. 
His heart raced while your mother spoke. Was he breathing too loud? Could your mom somehow sense his presence? Thankfully, he’d come over in his socks so there weren’t any shoes by the door to be evidence. He’d met your mom a couple times at this point but he was pretty sure your mom wouldn’t have been very happy to come home and find the two of you asleep in each other’s arms. 
“Did you have fun with Mark and your friends?” She chuckled as Mark’s heart continued racing. “That’s good to hear. Anyway, it’s been a very long double shift so I think I’m going to take a bath with those bath salts you got me for my birthday. Get a little more sleep.”
“Okay,” you said, “See you later.”
Mark heard the door close and relief swept over him. A moment later, when he was sure your mom was gone, he whispered, “Y/N…”
“Mark?” You opened the closet door, surprised that Mark was there. You found him in between your jeans and your t-shirts. “Oh my God, I thought you left! I’m sorry, I forgot to set my alarm. I should’ve told you my mom was coming home in the morning. Unfortunately, she’s not on vacation in Mexico...”
“It’s all good,” he said, chuckling as he stepped out of the closet. “As long as she didn’t see us in the bed together, I think we’ll both survive.”
You laughed, too. “That was way too close.”
“Yeah, for sure. I should get out of here before your mom comes back...”
You nodded, moving out of his way. “Let me make sure she’s in the bathroom.” You left him in the room for a moment. Mark grabbed his phone from under your pillow. You came back and said, “The coast is clear.” 
You waved him over and he followed you to the front door. 
Mark turned to you. He needed to know before leaving here. “Can I ask you something?”
“Yeah,” you said, stretching.
“Do you remember anything from last night?”
You nodded. “I remember everything. I meant everything.”
That brought a wide smile to Mark’s face. He felt his cheeks get hot and he wasn’t sure if he was visibly blushing or not. Then again, he didn’t care. Hell, if you meant all the things you’d said, nothing else mattered. You wanted to kiss him, genuinely. He wasn’t sure if you liked him like that but you clearly felt something. And, for now, that was good enough for him.
You had something you wanted to say but you hesitated. Things had taken a turn since last night. “Um…”
Mark noticed your hesitation. He supposed things did get a little awkward. “What’s up?”
“Since we’re sober now, will you kiss me?” you asked, taking Mark by surprise. You’d been so forward for the last ten hours and he had no idea what to make of any of this. You didn’t know what had come over you the past few hours.
“Yeah.” 
Mark leaned in slowly, pressing his lips to yours. Your lips felt the same, more or less. They weren’t as moist without lipgloss and they no longer tasted like cotton candy. But he enjoyed the kiss with you nevertheless. He pulled away a few seconds later with a smile. You looked into each other’s eyes for a moment and he kissed you again. “Is that what you wanted?”
“Yep.” You took his hand in yours and squeezed it. “Now get out of here before my mom catches you here.”
With a chuckle and a kiss on your cheek, Mark was gone with the wind. 
*
Doyoung was annoyed and frustrated. He’d been trying to contact you for weeks on end to no avail. You’d dodged every obstacle. He’d hit you up on LINKEDIN, for God’s sake. He was putting in all that effort and you ignored him every time. He’d tried contacting you through your friends, on social media, and so on. But there was never any response. 
And then the one opportunity he had to talk to you, you were drunk off your ass. Was it that bad that you couldn’t contact him sober? Was it that bad that you had to be drunk to speak to him?
He was frustrated because he fucked up. He fucked up and he didn’t mean to. New stressors in his life weren’t any excuse to treat you the way he did. He got caught up in this new life and he took you for granted. He assumed you’d stick around because you loved each other, even though he hadn’t been acting like it. College life became more important to him that managing the relationship. But he snapped that one time and that was all it took to destroy the relationship. He was so stupid not to realize what was going on, not to realize how distant he’d become. It didn’t look good on his part, as your boyfriend.
How could he have been so stupid? He missed you. Some days, you were all he thought about. Were you sleeping well at night? Were you having fun? Did you...miss him? 
He was frustrated because he made a mistake, one that cost him even his friendship with you. He lost his girlfriend and his best friend, all at once. And he hated it. He missed being able to vent to you when he’d had a shitty day and he wished that he could call and tell you about it. But you took that option away from him and Amber and Phil weren’t much help either. He didn’t want to put them in the middle; it was an issue that he had with you and it wasn’t right to try to go through them.
Doyoung’s phone rang on his desk, disrupting him from his thoughts. It was his mother. She was the last person he wanted to speak to right now. He let it ring, hoping that she’d just leave it at that. The phone stopped ringing and he let out a sigh of relief. The relief only lasted for a few seconds and she started calling again. Doyoung rolled his eyes and sighed instead of hurling the phone across the room like he’d imagined in his head. He picked up the phone from off the desk and answered it.
“Hello?”
“Hey mom.”
“Just calling to check on you. How is everything?”
“It’s going okay. I’m working on a paper right now. I’m almost done. I got an B on my biology exam. I think I’m getting the hang of how I need to study for that class.”
“That’s good to hear. I’m sure you’ll do better for the next exam. Start preparing now so you can get a head start.” She cleared her throat. “Did you book your flight yet?”
“Yeah,” he said. “I’ve been so busy. I meant to tell you about it yesterday.”
“Good. The prices were getting more expensive.” She let out a deep sigh. “I can’t believe your brother is getting married in three weeks.”
“I can’t believe I’m going to have to come right back to school after.”
“Me either. But you know how event venues are. They got a good deal considering it’s a weekend.”
“It’s going to be a long weekend.”
It would be. But all he could think about was the possibility of seeing you while he was back home. He had so many things he wanted to say, so many things to make up for. He just wanted confirmation if things between you two were truly over. What would he find if he looked you in your eyes? Love, hate, or indifference?
*
Amber hit you in the arm with the copy of Romeo and Juliet that had been sitting on your desk. “You and Mark what?” 
You shrugged and said, “We kissed...a few times. And he might’ve slept over last night...”
“Slept over? Did you guys do it?”
“No!” you said, probably a little more loudly than necessary. “It wasn’t like that. We just...cuddled and slept. But I forgot to set an alarm for when my mom came back so Mark must’ve heard her calling me and he hid in the closet.” You grabbed an oreo from the box sitting in the middle of the bed as Amber sat cross legged at the foot of the bed, waiting for the rest of the story. “At first I was sad because I thought he left in the middle of the night but he ended up in the closet because my mom came in to say hi.”
“Well this was definitely unexpected,” she said, “but Mark’s a pretty decent guy, being from the male species and all.”
“Yeah…”
“Why didn’t you tell me you liked Mark?”
“I didn’t know. I mean, I never thought about it.”
“So you’re not sure?”
“I think I do like him…I mean, I liked the kiss and the cuddling. And it’s not like he’s not attractive.”
“You’re not using him to get over Doyoung, right?”
You shook your head. Of course, getting over a two year relationship wouldn’t be easy but you had to move on eventually. And, with the way he treated you, it would be easier once you met someone who truly had your best interests in mind. Mark was a sweet guy and he was a good friend. Even though things had been platonic up until this point, Mark had become one of your closest friends. You could trust him with your life and you knew that, perhaps, you could trust him with your heart, too.
You weren’t sure what came over you that night but all you could think of at the time was “What if we kissed?” The alcohol gave you the nudge but you found yourself thinking of Mark constantly. And every time you did, you smiled. You remembered how you felt when things had gotten more romantic with Doyoung. You’d get butterflies when you heard his name and you were excited to see him everyday at school.
It was pretty early on but you knew that you were starting to like Mark, as more than just a friend.
*
Lucas jogged over toward Mark, sweaty and exhausted. He plopped down on the bench next to his friend and took a long swig from his water bottle. They’d been playing basketball for about an hour. “Ready to go?”
Mark nodded, standing up. “Yeah, let’s head back. I’m starving.”
Lucas stood too and they headed to the parking lot, in search of the car. Mark took out the keys to his parents’ car and got in. As Lucas got in the passenger, he said, “So what happened after we left last night? Did you tell her you like her?”
“Well we, uh, kissed...and I did tell her I like her.”
Lucas smirked. “So she likes you after all, huh?”
“I mean, I think so.”
“What do you mean, you think so? Did you ask her?”
“I mean I didn’t ask her directly.”
“So what the hell did you talk about then?”
“Well we actually didn’t do too much talking.” 
As soon as the words left Mark’s mouth, he regretted them. He knew that it sounded a lot dirtier than he meant. And he knew that Lucas would take it the wrong way.
Lucas’ eyes widened as he took it the wrong way. “You fucked her?”
Mark turned in his seat. “No, no! We didn’t have sex or anything like that. I know it sounds kinda weird but she brought me over next door to hangout because she didn’t wanna be alone and then she kissed me and then she wanted me to stay over and cuddle with her. So we cuddled and we both fell asleep.”
“Cuddle, huh? We all know what cuddling leads to…”
“Hey, just because that’s what you and Marina do doesn’t mean it’s the same for me and Y/N! When are you going to start dating her anyway?”
“Hey! Don’t change the subject! We’re not talking about me and Rina. When are you going to take Y/N on a date?”
“Soon. I’m just not sure what we should do. Got any date ideas?”
“Y/N is a pretty simple girl. What about a picnic at the park? You could go around dinner and watch the sun set.”
*
Mark was feeling extra excited today. He got to the bus stop a few minutes early, so he could rehearse what he was going to say to you. He’d rehearsed it a million times last night into this morning. Initially, he thought about texting it to you but he decided against it; he figured that asking you in person would be better.
He’d been texting you all weekend but he hadn’t hung out with you. Part of him was hoping that the two of you could hang out at least once but you’d been out with your mom all day yesterday. And he understood because your mom hadn’t had a Sunday off in a while. He was satisfied with the kiss you promised him over text messages. 
You snuck up on Mark without meaning to. He’d been so deep in his thoughts that he didn’t even see you coming in his peripheral vision. He jumped when you appeared in front of him, almost dropping his phone. “Shit!”
“Sorry,” you said, giggling, “I didn’t mean to scare you.”
“It’s okay.” He sighed. “Ready for school?”
“I’m never ready for school.”
Mark chuckled. “Are you busy this weekend?”
You shook your head. “Nope.”
“Would you wanna go on a date on Saturday?”
Your face lit up at his words. That made Mark happy. “I’d love that.” You hugged him, wrapping your arms around him tightly. And when you pulled away, you gave him that promised kiss. 
That, of course, made Mark even happier.
***
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batarella · 4 years
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3 birds 1 stone - BLUE
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From a world once so cruel, that never seemed to have granted them the time enough to be together, it’d never built up into anything more perfect.
WORDS: 7785 WARNINGS: Sexual Content
MASTERLIST | 3 BIRDS 1 STONE MASTERLIST | RED | YELLOW
-----
Dick:
It was concerning how at the moment he stepped into the narrow elevator, he wasn’t the least bit surprised at the pile of animal shit at the corner. It wasn’t until the doors closed when he noticed it, or rather his nose did, and he had to clog his nostrils just so he doesn’t pass out on the floor.
“Gar!?” he yelled just as the doors opened. No one was there, save for Raven with a book sitting at the couch. She didn’t glance at him. “Gar, I swear if you took a shit in the elevato-“
“That wasn’t me!”
Gar’s voice came from the kitchen, panting and occupied with something unruly. Then he heard plates falling to the floor, breaking, then there was a whimper. Not one that came from a human.
“Then who was it!?”
His question was soon answered, when a dog, a brown-furred mutt, sprinted out into the living room with a strip of bacon lodged in its teeth. “Gar!”
“I told you!”
Gar came out of the kitchen with a leash that had been ripped. “It wasn’t me!”
“You brought a dog into the tower?!”
“It was hungry!”
The mutt had finished off the bacon and headed straight for Raven’s lap. She gave it a scratch under its ear.
“Not on the couch,” Dick said.
“But Dick-“
“You’re not allowed on the couch either,” he told Gar. The boy murmured something Dick couldn’t hear, and after a second, no longer was he a boy but a green parrot. It squealed against Dick’s ear before it flew to Raven’s book.
“Jesus-“ he rubbed his ear. “I’m not in the mood.”
“SQUAWK-,” the parrot said. “WHAT’S UP WITH YOU?”
Having some coherent answer to that would only cement it as some grueling reminder. Hell, even thinking about it hurts more than the coward’s way out of pretending the past year never even happened. But then again, here he was, back in the Titan’s Tower to escape from the love of his life he could never be with and force himself into this infernal damnation of having forever to get over her. Here. Thousands of miles away. Where he’d only have his thoughts to battle and nothing else.
But all he said was: “Nothing.”
Dick should have told her, at least. Given her that kind of closure instead of his current disappearing act without so much as a note or a text or even a notice memo at the manor’s announcement board, which Alfred insisted with there being eight kids around.
But being away will be good. For her. For him. The first step to moving on. And with that, cutting all ties. Make it hurt less for both of them.
Maybe not all ties. He’ll have to go back to Gotham soon enough. But at least he was trying something. Not like the past five, six, seven years. God, has it really been that long?
She was probably over at Tim’s office, or Jason’s apartment doing whatever. Thinking about it won't do him any good. Doesn’t mean he subconsciously won’t.
It was apparent, and out into full consciousness, when he pulled out his phone and saw her name in five missed calls, with voice messages she’s left behind. A whole lot of minutes of them, too, it seems. She’d called while he was on the plane.
He could listen to them. Hear her voice one last time. Let his mind trail away. God, he was pathetic.
Dick put it up to his ear, his other hand stuffed to his pockets as he went out to the tower’s highest balcony so at least the air wasn’t so stuffy and he wouldn’t choke so much.
He wasn’t even nervous when he heard her speak. “Hey, Dick.”
A plane. A helicopter. Some folks over at the apartment building nearby partying it out. At least he’d have something to look at. He was exhausted, too. It was eight am over at Gotham. Shouldn’t have taken the overnight flight.
“You weren’t at the manor. I tried calling there first. I wanted to see you. Call me when you get this?”
He might. After he listens to the four other messages she’d left behind.
“Hey. I know it’s only been an hour. But please call me.”
Another one.
“Dick, where are you? I hope you didn’t change your phone. or I’ll look stupid leaving all these messages behind, which I’m not about to stop doing. Call me. Please. No one knows where you are but no one’s panicking either. It’s worrying me.”
Next one. From another hour after. He’d been gone a little over ten hours since he left. If Bruce didn’t have a tracker on him, they’d have called the police by now. But he highly doubted Bruce would take the time to announce his little trip to the West Coast to everyone in the house.
“Dick, if this is you ignoring me, you’re doing a hell of a good job at it. Did I do something?”
He heard her huff over the phone. No one else seemed to be around her.
“Please, I just wanna talk. Call me.”
The last one. Sent just four hours ago, which meant she’d been awake at four in the morning.
And, on top of that, the last one was five whole minutes long.
A call to tell her she was dating Tim again? Explaining how there are no hard feelings? Catch a movie sometime? An ass of him to think she’d be that cruel, but he was jetlagged and exhausted and the smell of dog shit still hadn’t left, which could be explained because that mutt had made a home just a few feet away from where he stood.
Dick played the message despite all that. Even if she called to tell him she’s getting married. He’d answer it.
“Dick…”
He could hear the rain, sheets shuffling under her feet.
“I’m sorry…” she said. “I… I probably took too long… I guess, if you’re ignoring me, you still deserve to know. I hope you get this message. I’ll tell you now, I guess. So you won't have to respond if you don’t want to.”
Tears. He could hear her wipe them off her skin.
“I kept you waiting for… I wanna say months but it’s a lot longer than that. Years… God, and I didn’t even see it… I took too long trying to figure this all out for myself, and you just kept waiting for me. No one should be worth waiting for that long.”
He was laughing as if it were one of her god-awful jokes. Funnily enough, it was worth it. Even when it sent him nowhere in the end. All that waiting was worth it. Somehow.
“Which is why I don’t blame you. Because you shouldn’t have taken this long. I thought even if I took another few weeks before I’d have enough courage to finally ask you to be mine, you’d still be there waiting for me. Selfish as it is, but I guess that’s your fault, too. Spoiling me and whatnot. Now my expectations for men are out of hand. Sorry.”
She even fucking laughed all the while he could hear her biting back her sobs. If he were there, he’d hold her by the shoulders and squeeze the fucking sense back into her and tell her yes, I did wait for you, and I’d wait for you for a hundred more years if I had to but I know you love someone else and-
Wait.
Wait.
Wait.
Backtrack.
What the hell did she just say!?
“I mean, I’m…” she continued, completely ignoring his panic. Was there a rewind on this thing??? “The past two days all I did was read your letter. Over and over again, trying to find something I could have missed. I memorized it by now. I’m a wreck. I’m sorry. I know it’s all so complicated, but I can't stop thinking that if the timing had just been good to us the past few years, all this would have been so different.”
Shit, shit, shit, shit, SHIT, is she actually saying she-
“I’m so sorry, Dick…” she sighed. “I kept you waiting. But even if… even if you’re not anymore, I already made up my mind. I’ll be here. It’s my turn to wait for you. As long as it takes. I love yo-“
Something hit the back of his knees.
Which, unfortunately, with him not in some defensive stance, caught him in a rather vulnerable position.
And with that, Dick tumbled off his feet, almost fell off the railing, and failed to catch his phone from slipping right off his hands.
“NO!”
“DOWN BOY-SQUAWK!” Gar the parrot cried and followed the obnoxiously unruly dog running around the terrace. “SORRY, DICK!”
The dog kept running around and almost crashed to his feet twice with it being too fast even for Gar's supposedly swift wings, and if he wasn’t so frozen and horrified, watching his phone descend from almost a hundred stories above ground, he would have grabbed that mutt by the neck.
“GAR, I SWEAR TO GOD-“
“I’m sorry!” He turned back into a human and caught the dog. “It was him!”
“My fucking phone just fell over the railing!”
“Want me to go get it-“
A car alarm. He could hear it even from above. Or Gar did. Because he went to look over and caught sight of his phone breaking a car’s windshield below. He scratched the back of his neck. “Sorry.”
“I have to…” Dick pulled on his scalp. “I have to go call her.”
“Call who?!”
“Give me your phone!”
“I don’t have a phone!”
“Give me Raven’s phone!”
“She talks to people with her mind,” Gar twirled his finger against his temple. “She doesn’t need a phone!”
“Just get- UGH!”
He stormed back into the building. “Where the hell is everyone else!?”
“They’re all out of town!”
“So it’s just you and Raven in here?! Without adult supervision!?”
“Why do you think we got a dog into the building?!”
Said dog stuck his tongue out at him like it was just so awfully adorable.
“Ok, ok, ok, ok, ok.” He can do this. He can calm down. “I have to go back. Or call her at least.”
“You’re going back to Gotham now?!”
She said she’ll wait. But to hell with keeping her waiting. “Yes. I do. I’m going back now. As soon as I can call her and tell her I’m on my way-“
“I wouldn’t do that.”
Raven didn’t even look up from her book, legs up on the couch as seemingly relaxed as if the whole wreck of a home they lived in wasn’t a mess at all.
“Next flight to Gotham’s in an hour.” She levitated an apple to her mouth and took a bite. “And the one after that’s in two days.”
“Two days!?”
“Airline shutdown. Some strike is happening,” she pointed at the TV playing the news. “I’d hurry if I were you.”
“God fucking dammit-“
“Good luck.” Raven took another bite.
Of course. Of course, this would fucking happen.
But, fuck, he didn’t know if he should just leap out the window to keep up now that everything he’s ever wished for had finally come to be. Because, to his own beliefs up in the clouds, he could probably fly with just the flap of his measly arms.
Y/N chose him.
He left for the elevator, just before Gar stopped him for leaving his wallet, then he was sprinting his way back to the airport.
.
You:
“I already made up my mind,” you said to your phone as if there were anyone else on the other line. As if he was there, listening to you. And that in a few seconds, he’d respond.
“I’ll be here. It’s my turn to wait for you. As long as it takes. I love you, Dick.”
Quite haunting how easy it was for those words to just roll off your lips, because as much as you thought all this to be so complicated and difficult, it was the easiest thing you’ve ever had to say.
At four am, alone in your studio with all your lights off and your sheets in an unkempt mess. You stuck your knees so close to your chest, trying to conceal at least some kind of warmth against you. But even with it so easy, it didn’t mean it wasn’t hurting.
“I can't,” you stuck your palm to your forehead. “I know things are so hard between us… and this past year is just…”
You breathed, longer than you’d hoped, just to get enough air into your lungs just so you wouldn’t collapse.
“God, I don’t even know what to tell you anymore. It all just… It feels like it’s too late. Everything went so wrong between us and I can't stop but think maybe it’s the world saying we’re just not meant to be,” you swallowed. “And the scary thing is… I don’t even care.”
The blue rose you painted, staring back at you once so bright, but as the passing days of you still wondering if were brave enough to do this at all, it had dried up and was now blank, patronizing even, that maybe it just wasn’t right, even when you wanted it to be.
“I don’t care if it’s so complicated, I want you…”
On the bed, just by your feet, you locked your eyes onto Dick’s beautiful handwriting, some that had been smudged with the sweat from your hands with the paper now crumpled up after all those months of reading and rereading.
You closed your eyes.
“You sent me an awfully painful, heart-breaking letter,” you said. “This is my awfully painful, heart-breaking reply.”
.
‘I usually just say all this in my head. That’s when I get poetic. Sometimes I write it down. Most of the time, I try to paint them. I think of galaxies and meadows and skies and flowers and all that, metaphors as they are, but I’ll say everything I’ve got. Right now. Because you deserve to know that all those years of you thinking nothing could ever go how you wanted, that it could end being just that.
.
Dick:
“Hey.”
Hands on the counter, the attendant looked startled at the least.
“I need a ticket for the next flight to Gotham.”
“I’m sorry, sir,” she said, after taking a while to look at Dick’s handsome yet frantically uneasy face. “You just missed it-“
“I know, I know, I missed the last one.” The one that left just five minutes ago because of fucking California traffic. “But I need to get on the next one. Please.”
“All flights from San Francisco after the next hour are canceled I’m afraid.”
“Any connecting flights? Anything that leaves before that?”
“Sir, I-” she stretched her fingers. “I’ll look for something.”
His fingers, tapping onto the counter until the tip of his nails started to hurt.
“The best option’s a connecting flight to Denver, then to New York.”
“New York!?”
“Then there’s the railway transits to Gotham. I can book you a ticket for that, too.”
From a seven-hour flight to a seventeen-hour trip with layovers and a crowded train.
But as soon as he heard best option he pulled out his wallet quicker than when they told him his rent was three months overdue and that if he weren’t to pay the doorman that very instant they’d evict him.
He rushed to the first plane, closed his eyes, and prayed she hadn’t said anything in her voice message too important for him to miss out on.
.
‘The universe, or whatever it is out there that has a say in all this, they didn’t make it easy for us at all. If they did, we would have met long before we went too far into this mess. We were friends, sure, and you have no idea how much I value our friendship.
But I guess not even that friendship’s strong enough for us to deny what’s really going on. And that’s why it’s all so hard. I can't even look at you without thinking about kissing you, or holding you, or touching you. I can't hold your hand without wanting to never pull away. I can't even be in the same room with you and not stare, even when you’re just reading a book or talking to someone else. You are… you’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen, and you’re just as beautiful within, which is why it was so easy to love you, and so hard to keep it in.’
.
You:
Morning. Eleven am at that. You slept before the sun was up, at least. But you were up all night.
Nothing. Not a call, not even a text from him.
Everything shattered, and you were still half asleep. The next thing you did, and the next thing to do, was wrap yourself up with the thickest layer of your blanket and hide in the dark, even with it such a lovely day.
Another message wouldn’t be such a good idea if he still hadn’t opened the last five, which seemed highly unlikely with him gone for almost a day now.
A day. It had been a day.
But nothing on GCPD’s notices reported a missing person’s file of an utterly gorgeous, half-Romani hunk of a man in any of their websites. You called the manor, again. Still, there was nothing.
Twelve at noon. All you had for lunch was a bagel from three nights ago. It stuffed you, at least.
You sat at your dining table and stared at your phone.
If there was a moment for so much love to come crashing at once, it would all have been too great for that to be possible.
But the moment you realized it was there at all,
A few weeks ago. Steph’s birthday.
A party at the manor. It wasn’t much. Just a little get together with everyone at the parlor.
Everyone was talking, laughing, and frankly you wished you’d joined them. It looked like fun.
But instead, you were looking out the window, at the gardens white with melted snow and winds strong enough to knock the leaves out the branches. But you couldn’t hear any of that, which made it peaceful. It was the trees that danced, birds instead of planes that hovered over the sky, not a star above but perhaps it was because it was so full of clouds. It looked cold. Cold always looked so beautiful when you were looking out from the warmth of the inside.
Dick walked up to your side, just a reasonable distance away so he wouldn’t touch your shoulder, but close enough that you’d smell the jasmine from his neck.
“You’re just gonna stand out here and watch the glass fog up?”
You remembered laughing, probably at something else he’d said after that.
“It’s pretty when you look hard enough.”
And all the while, he didn’t pull your arm and drag you over at the crowd. He didn’t tell you to join them, to loosen up and have fun or have a drink or in any way stop you from what you were doing.
He just stood there and joined you, instead. Ditched his family. Didn’t even speak much.
He stood there because he wanted to. Because you staring out the window was more interesting to him than a whole crowd of kids doing whatever.
When he balled up his fist, covered it with his sleeve, and wiped the window right in front of you to rid it from the fog so you could see the gardens clearer, you knew you loved him.
Such a small act that was, but it was the finality of everything else that built up to that moment.
Then, you remembered what you told him last night, in a voice message that lasted way too long and sounded far too painful.
.
‘I don’t regret what I had with Tim… but I do regret not saying anything the past four years when I had the chance. You were there. You were there and I could never have had it any other way. When we’re not trying so hard for everything to be alright, everything’s at its best. I’m not even your girlfriend, and already I think about every minute I spend with you and laugh before I’m off to bed. I think about your jokes way too long than they should ever last. And your smile, god your smile, saying that that it’s all I could ever think about wouldn’t do it any justice. You have drawn out the ugliest laugh out of me that never should have come out of any human in existence. And frankly, I’m glad you do. Because just when I thought I could never smile again, you made me the happiest I could ever be.’
.
Dick:
Of all days. Of all times.
His survival rate at that point, rushing through Denver Airport with just a fifteen-minute layover period, with his shoelaces undone, probably wasn’t one he should have relied on. He was starving, but he had the appetite of a mammal in hibernation with the horrible airplane food costing a hundred dollars and everything else taking too long to prepare.
With just thirty seconds to spare, he fell to his too-narrow coach seat, shuffled along so his large ass-damn this cursed asset-would fit through the aisle and breathed just as the air hissed into the cabin after they closed the service door.
Head against the back of the seat, eyes up the ceiling, at the smoke that blew in through that gap outside the overhead locker, he ignored his dried skin, his dry mouth, his feet that were close to standing on a thousand knife tips, his eyes so close to just shutting out, his wallet painfully thin with this whole trip costing the equivalent of a round trip to Shanghai, and his whole body about to collapse. He hasn’t slept in twenty-four hours. It didn’t look like he was ever going to sleep at all.
And he hasn’t even called. God, what was she doing at home? Is she okay? Is she eating okay? Is she worried about him, staring at her phone wondering what she did wrong when she was nothing less of a perfect creation of all the gods that existed, an angel the earth didn’t deserve?
He really, really had to call.
Someone just sat next to him. A child. And next to him was his mother, who just put down her phone from a call.
“Excuse me.” Dick put on his award-winning smile, pretended he wasn’t sweating his balls off or that he was in any way close to psychological death, and hoped he looked the part as well.
“Yes?”
“Is it okay if I, uh, borrow your phone? I have to make a call. It’s sort of an emergency.”
“The plane’s about to take off.”
“It won't take long. I promise.”
He probably didn’t look as charming as he’d hoped. His hair was a mess not even a bird would settle into. The woman looked at him quizzically, up and down, and shrugged. Like it was handed to him on a silver plater, she gave him her phone.
The aircraft was about to take off. He only had so long.
He called Y/N’s number that he didn’t even know he memorized and settled back. It started ringing.
“MOM!”
The kid beside him. He was tugging on his mother’s shirt.
“MOM, I’M BORED.”
“We’re in a plane,-“
“I’M BORED. I WANNA PLAY ROBLOX-“
“Not now, we’re in a plane. Sit down.”
“GIVE ME YOUR PHONE-“
“That man has my phone.”
Fuck.
Y/N, fucking pick up.
“HEY, GIVE ME MY MOM’S PHONE BACK-“
“Kid, I hear ya. But you have to give me this one-“
“GIVE ME THE PHONE-“
That kid, a chubby one not older than six, stood up from his chair and was wild enough to grab Dick’s hand away from holding the phone up his ear. If he weren’t so desperate, he would have let him have it.
But god almighty, he’s never been as desperate as a starving man in a desert.
“Kid. Just one minute.”
“NO, GIVE ME!”
The mother put on a sleeping mask and faced the other way.
“KID-“
“GIVE ME MY PHONE-“
Back and forth, both grabbing onto the phone and the kid having the strength he did not at all expect, they ended up wrestling it out in the cramped-up economy seats until the kid was screaming out his ears.
He’s never looked so ridiculous but jokes on everyone else if they thought he could care less.
“Excuse me.”
An attendant, bags under her eyes and giving both of them, not just the kid, a dirty look.
“I’m sorry, sir, but the other passengers have complained about the noise. I’m gonna have to ask you to take your seat.”
“NO!” the kid screamed.
“DID YOU JUST BITE ME!?” Dick cried out.
“GIVE ME THE PHONE!”
“I NEED TO CALL SOMEONE!”
Dick grabbed the phone off his hands, palm to the kid’s face to stop him from reaching out to his outstretched arm. “Don’t you have some kind of coloring book you can give him?”
The attendant smiled, albeit forcefully, and walked back over to the back of the cabin. The kid did not stop trying to grab it off Dick’s arm.
She gave the kid a bag that probably had books and crayons and whatever stuffed inside. It looked so old. It had to have been in storage for the past ten years.
But as if some miracle heard him, the kid shut up, took the bag, and settled on his seat. Then he was as quiet as a mouse.
Fucking finally.
He held the phone up his ear and closed his eyes, fingers easing the tension on the nerve on his forehead.
“And sir?”
The attendant smiled at him. It didn’t look so much of a smile as it was a death threat.
“I’m gonna have to ask you to turn off your mobile device.”
To say he wanted to squeeze the life out of everyone in the whole aircraft, including himself, wouldn’t cut it.
And he didn’t even have it in him to protest.
“Hello?”
Her voice. At the other end of the line. That word was all there is to it, the only thing he heard.
Dick sighed, closed his eyes, counted to three, then ended the call after just two seconds.
The next thing he heard, for the next three hours, would be the screams of the child at his side, kicking on his seat like a fucking soccer ball.
.
‘That call from a year ago. The one about Kori. Fuck, I don’t even know where to begin. I overreacted. By a mile. Did some stupid shit to make up for that guilt and masked it over as another heartbreak when really, it was me refusing to have to go through all that again. I had to see you with that woman when I was in love with you for three years. Of course, it hurt. But I shouldn’t have an excuse. It was so stupid. Just thinking about it makes me want to break. I’m so sorry about that, Dick. I know we’ve already been over that months ago, but I just want to clear everything while I still can. God, I don’t even know if you’d listen to all this. I’m rambling. I’m sorry. I put all the blame on you when I had my share of mistakes. A whole lot of them. I’m sorry. I love you. And I’m sorry.’
.
You:
Hung up after two seconds. All you heard on the other end of the line was breathing and huffing, and nothing else. Whoever it was, they’ve been calling the past two minutes, just as you stepped out of the shower. And you almost cracked a rib flying from your bathroom to your kitchen table with just a towel around you, hoping to see his name on the screen. But alas, your luck just wasn’t at its peak.
You put your phone down, still with nothing to do, nothing else you could think of doing, than to just wait on that seat, stare at your phone, and hope Dick hadn’t hurt himself going after some goon alone the night before. Still no missing persons report. Nothing from the rest of the team, either.
Maybe just once more. You could call him. It wouldn’t annoy him too much. It had been hours since the last one.
You called, put the phone up your ear.
No ringing. It went straight to voice mail.
You opened your mouth, thinking you had something to say.
But you didn’t have anything to say. Not anymore. Not after you poured your whole heart out on the last one and now your throat was as dry as your palms were sweating.
You put your phone down, facing away from you, then you sank to your arms, burying your crumbling face away even with no one to see you.
.
‘That’s why I hate myself for not caring if this was difficult. Because I know, somehow, that’s it’s all still gonna be worth it. With you. Just thinking about the things we’d do, you’ve been the light of my life, the one person I look for not just because I need it, but because being with you makes so much of my day, every day that I see you. I look for you in crowds. I turn to your face when I want to look at something pleasant. I stare at doors, constantly hoping you’d be the one to walk in. I seek out for your voice, call you even when I know it’s a bother, find the most ridiculous excuses and the most stupid questions just so I’d have a reason to stand close to you, to have you talking to me, wanting all that everyday. I’ve never met anyone like you, Dick. I’ll never get used to you, and there’s no way in hell that I’d ever get tired of you. And maybe that’s the price to pay with all this being so hard. As complicated as it is, the troubles aren’t half the worth of the happiness it comes with.’
.
Two flights, three within the past thirty hours, jet-lagged far beyond a night’s repair, and his stomach in so many knots that even the bag of peanuts from the plane was too much to digest. And it wasn’t from poisoning or hunger or whatever it was. Everything in a whirlwind, one he can't even track.
He got to New York before it was dark, and he wanted to kiss the floor.
But he wasn’t at Gotham yet. This trip wasn’t over.
And if it weren’t for the half a million people crowded over at the airport, he would have been in Gotham right at that second.
Past the crowd, fumbling and running for whatever life he had left that wasn’t a spirit descended into something infinitely better than this, he made it over to the other side of the terminal, with his pits sweating his shirt off and his legs made of cooked chicken drumsticks and dough.
He got to the railway station, over at the attendant behind the counter.
“Excuse me,” he panted, and just like the one at the San Francisco airport, it startled her. Except now, there was no using his charm or his looks when he looked like he crawled out of a swamp.
“To Gotham,” he said.
“Ticket?”
He reached for his wallet, hands shaking so horribly it was worrying if he hadn’t known it came with his mind being as much of a mess as a wrecked ship from the 1800s.
And all the more did they tremble, down to his sorry knees, when he opened every flap there was on his wallet to find every pocket empty.
No.
No. no. no. no. no.
He searched his pockets. His jacket. His pants. His fucking shoes. If he had a hat he’d probably look into that too.
Nothing. Not a stub. A tiny stub that would have easily been blown by so much as a gust from a fan, let alone running a marathon in three airports in a single day.
“I,” he swallowed. “I seemed to have lost my ticket.”
Yeah. He wasn’t getting out of this one. The attendant looked at him and snarled like the annoyance he was.
“All the trains are sold out. And I’m afraid you can't board the train without a ticket.”
“Ma’am, I really, really, have to get to Gotham-“
“I’m afraid you’re gonna have to step out of the line.”
Like every force in the universe was out to get him.
“Do you have a phone? A payphone at least? I really need to call someone-“
“Sir, please step out of the line.”
“Please, ma’am, there has to be some way you can squeeze me into one of those trains-“
The attendant waved at someone behind him.
Two security guards were at his side before he could even turn around.
“Alright, alright, I’m leaving,” he huffed. “You guys don’t happen to have a phone I could use?”
Both guards ignored him, set him aside against a pillar.
And, with the excruciating exhaustion finally crashing into this one blow to the face, he stuck his back against the column, head up to the ceiling, then fell on his ass.
God, what does he even say to her after this?
If he actually gets to talk to her, that is.
“Final call for boarding!”
That light. One, single light. Or two, if he focused his eyes. The headlights from outside the revolving doors, from a bus that just opened its doors. It was a light, because it had GOTHAM in bold letters pasted onto its windshield.
And a line of people stepping inside. Kids and adults, old people alike.
He sat up from the floor, hungry, tired, and in pain.
But this was all going to be worth it. Every minute of this.
He just knew, that one last push, after this tormenting, inferno of a day, would all come to an end he’d dreamed about since he first laid eyes on her that day at the Wayne Manor’s library.
Dick got in line outside the bus, told the conductor he’d pay when they get inside. And after he did, he had just a quarter in his wallet to spare. No one sat beside him. The others were at the back. The one across was fast asleep. He couldn’t call her.
He’ll just have to hope, that whatever worries she had waiting for him to come up, that she’d forgive him enough for all this to end the way he hoped it would.
Three hours on a bus.
Didn’t even sound like it was remotely a long time.
The moment he took his seat, the bus doors hissed closed, and the air so silent, so did everything else calm.
He’s waited so long.
But he just had to wait for another three hours. In a bus. Then he’ll see her.
He closed his eyes.
.
‘I don’t even know why I rambled so much about all this being so complicated.
Because even if I had to walk up to the sky, I know there’s a galaxy waiting for me at the end. You are worth it. You are worth everything. I’ve never been so obsessed with anyone my whole life. You are, with my whole heart, my greatest love. And you are so beautiful that I never want to look at anything else ever again. And I never thought I’d get know beauty the way I do when I talk to you. You are everything I could ever want. And so much more.
And that pain, that hurt we both had to go through after all those years. That pining and waiting, and the heartbreak just because I was too stupid to understand that it didn’t have to be so hard after all, it doesn’t even matter, when at the end, I get to be with you.
I’d go through all that again if it means I can be with you.
You are the man I’ve dreamt about since I could first dream, and I’m lucky enough to have you in my reality. It’s you I want, Dick.
So I’ll wait for you. As long as I have to.
I love you so much.
Please, for the love of God, call me.’
.
You:
That message.
The longer you stared at your phone, the more you wondered if it was the right thing to do at all.
It was four am. You were tired. And worried.
And it was four am now, a whole day after.
Not a single call.
You’ve done it this time. You tripped at the finish line.
You were selfish enough to keep that man waiting for so long hoping he’d keep going, just as he had been for years.
And now, this is what you get.
You have yourself alone, in your apartment, one you haven’t cleaned in a week, and your heart in the same shatters as it often had been.
Your phone rang. You weren’t so excited to pick it up. Rightfully so when you saw it was just Bruce.
“Hello?” you said, your weight against the table’s surface, also surprised that it hadn’t broken.
“Y/N,” Bruce said. “I heard you were looking for Dick.”
“Mhm?”
“Sorry I haven’t called. Anyways, the last location I can point him to was at the Titans Tower in San Francisco.”
Okay.
You’ve had your heart broken before.
But it wasn’t just that that had broken right then.
Everything else, every bone, every bit of flesh there was, it was this numbing buzz you couldn’t even fight.
“What?”
Just then, someone knocked on your door.
And it wasn’t just a knock. They were pounding against the wood.
The ringing in your ears hadn’t even subsided, and you were breathless, muscles stiff. You just let the pounding go on until you heard Bruce hang up on the other line.
Life didn’t even give you so much as a second to process all that, of what he could be doing there, who he was with.
Your walked to the door, and without looking into the eyehole, you unlatched the lock and opened it.
Some glitch there was if all this were nothing but a simulation.
But it was as if the last five minutes-no-the last two days hadn’t happened at all.
Dick never looked like such a mess.
But, nonetheless, the way you stared at him was as if he was as beautiful as he ever was.
Everything that had broken, the moment you looked into his eyes, had fallen right back into place, into an entity far stronger than any quake could knock it out of.
Dick shut the door behind him.
He grabbed your face.
Then he kissed you. Without words. Without letting so much as a speck of time, however it worked now that it’d stopped, pass and waste away.
.
Dick:
Whatever she told him in that message he never got to hear, everything she ever had to say, the instant he felt her kiss him back, it was like every word flew out of her lips. How she wanted him. How she chose him. How in love she was with the mess of a human being he could be. How all the trials they’d been forced to go through, all the misunderstandings and the fights and the long months of this troubling, awkward place they wanted nothing more than to climb out of. He got all that with the way her lips molded so wanting and harsh, pressed so hard against his dried, chapped pair that have never witnessed anything more beautiful and so awfully perfect.
No more time to be wasted.
Not another second.
He had her. He finally had her.
He got the girl.
Not a chance that he wasted so much as another second.
He pushed her against the wall and the gasp that came out of her wasn’t at all out of pain, but at the sheer desire that had sparked at such impact that only knocked her into the same place he’d long settled in. And he could just feel, how much she wanted so badly to speak, to tell him what was raging in her head that was as much of a mess as his. But they’ll talk. Eventually. After.
All he wanted, right then, was to have her. Love her. Love her. To send her off to some paradise that long surpassed oceans and mirages and heavens that stood on clouds, to culminate that seemingly endless torture into a reward so great, that to say it would have been worth it would be so much an understatement. To play every instrument there was and let the song resonate into her body, and make it last for the rest of his life for so long as he could touch her. All that, he was going to give her tonight. Tonight. Right then and there.
Grabbing her legs up to his hips, her hands pinned to the wall above her head, it was too much of a flash for him to rush into this beautiful thing that shouldn’t be rushed at all. But he couldn’t slow down if it meant that he lives. Even if he died right after, he just couldn’t hold back.
He was pushing himself into her and the sounds that he earned out his lips were more than any songbird could cry out. After just having her against that wall, he finally got the sense to take it to the bed. It was dark. Not a light was on. And it was raining outside the one window she had near the bed and just the streetlight outside was enough to make him see her face. Dick placed her on top of his lap, on which she enjoyed herself to her own pace. Her hips were like waves, the ocean that rocked about, and the stain on his pants that she’d left behind was just as wet as so.
At that moment even she didn’t want to wait and talk any longer.
He took off her clothes, lied back.
Then he hoisted her up so the sweetest part of her body was just hovering over his mouth, her strong, beautiful legs, one of skin and the other of metal, on either sides of his head.
.
You:
You were made of gemstones. You were shimmering.
Of diamonds and rubies and emeralds, of the most precious rocks that could be found on every soil on earth.
Everything. That pain. That darkness. All the troubles and hardships, the disputes and every tear you’ve ever had to shed. Gone. Gone when he drew out this wonderful melody of sensations from his sweet, sweet tongue quivering you to every core. You were rocking, shaking, trembling, barely keeping yourself up. Not long after you screamed, and like the skies heard you it screamed back with a thunderous roar.
Then Dick shed his own clothes and moved inside you, rolling your hips with your two bodies now this one, beautiful entity, like you were holding his hand, just as you did right then, as you both ran through the darkness of a cave that has long haunted you, with creatures and bats and ghosts flying about, just to reach the end that was a light so close and so bright, you chased yourselves, chased that very light.
And once you reached it, that blinding, flashing white light that shone with this painful, glorious sting to every bit of your flesh, to say you found that end would be wrong. It wasn’t an end. It was this continuous, tantalizing aroma that would last a lifetime. It was beauty. You felt beauty. And it was in ripples you couldn’t see. A blur you couldn’t comprehend.
You had so much to tell him and ask him about.
But just as that wonderful night showed you, you had the rest of your life to do just that.
.
Epilogue
Dick:
Life could only ever be so cruel.
But life gives its niceties. Sometimes, to the people so used to it that they take it for granted.
But it’s even more so of a nicety when it’s the people who’ve long deserved it.
Not to say he deserved the world, but it was just that he’d gotten. From a world once so cruel, that never seemed to have granted them the time enough to be together, it’d never built up into anything more perfect.
Watching her from his car’s driver seat, from where he had a perfect view of her looking at the wondrous scenes flash by outside the window. It was even more beautiful, more than ever before, now that he could take just a second off his time from the steering wheel just to kiss her.
Just a little over six months together. Never has there been anything so rewarding in his life. A rainbow, ten of them at least, that filled what was once this depressingly grey sky. He always knew it’d be worth the world. But even he surprised himself.
When they parked the car, got out into this wide, orange field, a farmland just outside of Jersey with a valley at the farthest end, the only thing that battled the brightness of her smile was the sun itself.
“It’s beautiful, Dick.”
Her voice, even more so.
He set up her canvas, all her paint, and her brushes. They found a spot on the grass that was clean enough for them both to sit on. She didn’t use her easel. Instead, they both laid on this plaid red and white sheet over the grassy soil, her using her own knees to hold it up. And Dick sat beside her, watching her as the hours ticked. Without looking away, no longer ashamed when she’d catch him.
Just before the last of the sun had set, he pulled out from his pocket a ring, one with a diamond a shape of a white rose on top.
He got it a week after they got together.
Her face, her lips wide open as she realized what came in front of her, then he asked her to be his. Forever.
She said yes, just as the sun fell.
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mymelodyheart · 3 years
Text
Miles Between Us Chapter 14 ~The Element of Surprise ~
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WARNING: VERY EXPLICIT SEXUAL CONTENT
Previously in The Reunion
They fitted perfectly, her softness cradling his boneless heap, making him hard as steel again. Some part of his brain must have still been functioning because he jerked and reached out for her bra to cover her when his doorbell rang. Christ!  Forcing his body to move with marginal success, he yanked her up and pulled up his jeans.
Claire slid off the table and grabbed her clothes. "Who could that be?"
"That better not be yer uncle or ..." Jamie trailed off, muttering curses under his breath, annoyed at the disturbance as he was just revving up for part two of their lovemaking. When he opened the door, a sense of deja vu hit him when he saw Mrs Fitz standing there with what seemed like a plate of a lemon meringue pie. What the fuck?
"Mrs Fitz!"
The older woman didn't bother to hide her curiosity this time as her eyes tried to peer past his shoulders. "Heard ye have company, lad, and I havenae seen Miss Claire the last couple of days."
  If you wish to read this on AO3, here is the link.
If you wish to read this from the beginning:
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  Six Days Later
Claire's heavy eyelids fluttered open, her brain still addled by sleep. It took her a while to gather her thoughts and remember how she'd made it to bed last night. She shifted slightly in bed, but there's a two-hundred-fifty pound of hard-muscled, naked male restricting her movement. Jamie's arm was draped across her waist, securing her against his chest, her legs confined under his heavier ones. She could feel his soft, steady breathing blowing warm air on top of her head, reminding her how well he'd been sleeping the last few nights. There had been no night terrors or unpleasant dreams interrupting his sleep, and she put it down to his workload during the day and their physical activities between the sheets at night.
Today was Friday, and the realisation caused a huge smile to spread across her face. Last night she'd worked late until past ten, and Jamie had found her fallen asleep in front of her laptop in her studio shed. He'd scooped her up in his arms and helped her get ready for bed, and just before sleep claimed her, he'd whispered he had a surprise for her today. 
She wondered what the surprise was and guess it would probably be a long lie-in for them and breakfast in bed. Looking back, the past few days had flown by in a blur, packed with work and catching up with her uncle Lamb during nights. Ever since her emotional reunion with Jamie, her work-related things had gone from a shamble of mess to running smoothly. It's as if the universe had decided to grant her reprieve as everyone went out their way to appease her. Even her boss John seemed to have given her space and was allowing her to work in peace. Somehow, deep down, she had a sneaking suspicion Jamie had something to do with it. 
It had all began at the start of the week when Jamie had been at work. Tom had stopped by the cottage to hand her a signed contract agreeing to his book's publication. By the time she'd told John the good news, he'd been in his element detailing his main point plan for getting the word out and announcing the book deal to Tom's adoring followers. She'd thought her boss would demand to get her and Tom on the next plane to London, but instead, John had told her he'd arranged a team to fly to Inverness for a formal meeting with their new author. As if that wasn't enough, two days later, Mary had produced enough drafts for Claire to work on and promised there would be more on the way. Her uncle, sensing work was piling, would occasionally stop by either to whip up something to eat or bring food while she'd been ensconced in her studio shed. Not that it was unusual for her uncle to perform domesticated pursuits; however, it's still surprising that he was going the extra mile to help around the house when he had the Highlands at disposal for his adventures being an outdoor person that he was.
It's becoming clear this week was proving to be a period of many turning points. She had no idea what the future had in store for her and Jamie, but she knew something had shifted in their relationship, and it was definitely for the better. Though she's still the same girl who's still trying to find her place in the world and fit in, she knew she'd changed, too. A few months ago, she would have probably backed down from any forms of conflicts, citing life as complicated enough without adding more complications. But she'd learned how to respond, choose fights that are worth fighting for and cast aside that wasn't deserving of her peace of mind. She'd also learned that once in a while, it's good for her sanity to give propriety and rules the middle finger when a situation called for it. 
It's hard to believe she's planning her life in the Highlands, the place where her parents had met and found love in each other. In her quest to get to know them more, she'd spent her holidays here to be closer to their memories and live that adventure they'd so craved. Now, she was involved with a man tormented with demons. If her parents were still alive today, she wondered how they would receive Jamie. Would they have been like Jenny or her uncle, suspicious and sceptical of their relationship? Or would they have been happy with her choice just like Willie, Brian, and Ellen have been with Jamie's?
Deep in her heart, she knew that her parents would have taken one look at them and understood that Jamie was special and meant to be her life adventure. From what Claire had surmised from uncle Lamb's stories, her parents have been that kind of people, magnanimous of spirit and always saw the best in others. Jamie was like that too. He'd taken a gamble with her despite their differences and the geographical challenges ahead. Though it seemed she was helping him with his condition, unbeknownst to Jamie, he too was helping her heal the part of her that became an orphan. In some invisible way, he was repairing something in the fabric of her world that had been torn down the middle when her parents passed away. She absorbed that thought and was reminded of what Uncle Lamb once told her, that her father always had a peculiar sense of humour. With that in mind, she'd like to think that just maybe her father had sent Jamie her way on purpose. His way of telling her to let go of the past, not over-think, embrace the Highlands as much as he had and just love.
Lying next to Jamie in bed, she felt totally at peace. They might have had a crisis of faith, but she was confident they'll find their way through whatever path was laid before them. Their love wasn't and probably never going to be easy, given their journey had been emotional, tangled with roadblocks, denials and self-preservation. Still, she wanted to find her way with him. She'd just discovered this strength she didn't realise she had, and Jamie continued to surprise her with his single-mindedness purpose to be cured. Someone once said there's no fulfilment without a bit of struggle. Just like in the stories she hoped to publish one day, the heroes had to break down first and bleed before earning their happy ending. Well, if that's the rule, she couldn't envision facing life's trials and tests with any other person to stand beside her other than Jamie.
Her smile was still in place when her thoughts were suspended by a rush of heat as Jamie's hand coasted over her hip to disappear between her thighs. A sudden thrill shot through her, making her breath catch in her lungs. He shifted the leg holding her thighs down and deftly opened her to his touch, stroking the sensitive flesh in between. She felt his shaft stir against her bottom as she scooted closer to him, eliciting a guttural sound to escape his lips.
"I can practically hear the cogs turning in yer head, Sassenach," he muttered thickly, his breathing turning shallow at the back of her neck. He nipped her earlobe between his teeth and tugged. "What's going on in that mind of yers?"
"Oh, this and that and how you've been sleeping soundly ...these last few nights." She gasped out loud when he rubbed her nub with a calloused thumb. She tilted her head back to look at his face, and her lips were met by a long-drawn, possessive kiss. By the time their mouths parted, she was panting for air and squirming against him mindlessly. 
"Christ, ye're ready for me. Why did ye no' wake me up?" He thrust his finger deep inside her, fondling the spot he knew drove her wild and frantic. "Next time ye want me, wake me up."
"I-I couldn't. You were sleeping so peacefully." 
He paused his ministrations. "That's no' the answer I was hoping to hear."
Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ! "Y-yes, next time, I'll wake you up!"
"That's my lass." He sank another finger into her entrance. But as she tried to clench around him, his fingers slid out, using her wetness to coat her nub and gently rub her aching flesh. She wanted to scream at him for teasing her, but he only softly chuckled against her neck. At that moment, she needed to come more than she needed air. She hoarsely whispered his name in a plea for release. "Ach, no' yet, Sassenach ... ye listen better when I'm touching ye." She yelped when he suddenly yanked the covers away and flipped her on her stomach, the crisp morning air caressing her heated skin. "Let me see first that beautiful arse of yers." He shoved a pillow beneath her hips, putting her in a highly arousing position, her face mushed against the mattress and her bottom in the air. "Such a beautiful bum."
"Jamie ..." 
He kneaded the curves of her buttocks as he let out a frustrated male groan. "Let us talk first. This is the only time I'm pretty sure ye're no' gonnae argue with me with what I'm about to say. Ye listening?"
"Yes, yes ...get on with it, damn it!"
He laughed out loud just before his lips travelled along the path of her spine, kissing and nibbling her flesh. One hand slid around her belly and down the apex of her thighs, slipping blunt fingers into her folds as his mouth moved to her neck. He lingered there, biting hard and then soothing the sting with a lick of his tongue. Anticipation pulsated within her body, and goosebumps erupted on her skin as the weight of his erection slid against her upturned bottom, and Jamie positioned himself behind her. When he hefted her higher with his forearm, she let out a squeak. "Ye'll no' be working this weekend."
"Jamie," she whimpered. "B-but I can't."
"Oh yes, ye can." Skilled fingers stroke her sensitive nub, and with one thrust of his hips, he completely filled her, taking her by surprise. She nearly screamed, pressing her mouth against the mattress, suddenly mindful of nosey neighbours. She remembered what Jamie had told her about Mrs Fitz and muffled her moans on the covers of the bed.
"Oh, God, this is not fair," she breathed on an uneven exhale.
"I told ye last night, I have a wee surprise for ye. Ye've worked long enough this week. Ye're taking a wee break this weekend." When she didn't respond, he stilled his hips and took out his fingers from inside her. "You need a break, Sassenach. Now, for the love of God, just say yes, Jamie."
When Jamie drew out his hardness and plunged deeply back into her, heart-stopping sensations coursed through her whole body. Something about how he positioned her, the fluid, smooth drives of his movement made her mad with need. She wanted to urge him to go faster, but she clamped her mouth shut. He was deliberately torturing her and forcing her to agree with him. So she decided she was going to get her own back. Contracting her inner walls, she clenched around him. From experience, she knew the more he had to work to push into her, the wilder he would become. Just when she thought she finally got the upper hand, he paused and dropped his weight, stopping just short of squashing her. "No, no, no! Please don't stop!" she wailed.
"Oh, aye." He pushed his lower body tight to her bottom, his erection throbbing inside her. When she tried to wriggle her bum to urge him to start moving again, he firmly gripped her hips in place. "Ah, I ken what ye're up to," he whispered hotly in her ears. "I'm no' taking no for an answer. Ye owe this break to yourself."
"You don't play fair."
"Neither do ye."
Thinking she could compromise later after spending the whole morning with him, she finally conceded. "Fine. Just keep moving, for God's sake!" she hissed.
He let out a pained laugh and pressed his lips on the crook of her neck. "Good lass, ye ken it makes sense." Then cursing under his breath, he moved all the way out in one smooth slide before deliciously gliding deep back. "Christ, I can feel ye want to come, but ye're going to stay with me a little longer. Ye fell asleep on me last night, leaving me with a painful cockstand." 
"Jesus, Jamie."
"Aye," he rasped hoarsely into her hair. "I said the same thing when ye wriggled that pert arse against me and fell asleep immediately."
The way his thickness was invading her from an angle almost sent her hurtling over the edge. And it gave her a new appreciation for math. The thought almost made her laughed out loud if it wasn't for the pulsing pleasure between her legs.
"Christ ...look at ye," Jamie gritted, his voice sounding raw and almost severe. "So bloody perfect." 
He nudged her legs wider and changed his movements to short, strong strokes, increasing his pace with primitive energy that left her gasping for breath. With the sound of their slapping bodies, the earthy scent of arousal, the sweaty slide of skin, her belly began to tighten and coil.
"I just want to make ye happy, Sassenach," he groaned, bearing down his upper body more, his hips relentlessly pounding into hers. "So just say yes to my wee surprise, aye?" 
"Yes, yes, yes." Their voices sounded so far away, and her initial hesitation about taking a break from work almost forgotten. Not entirely, though. She tried to grasp that mental note about emails to be sent, but the hand gripping her hips moved, and fingers slid to rub her nub, stroking and pushing her further towards her peak. She gave in and widened her thighs to let him fill her more. But it left her no time to prepare for the release that shattered her apart, her love for him and the physical pleasure fusing to intensify the sensations blasting through her. It threatened to overwhelm her, but Jamie's presence anchored her as he followed her over, groaning her name, gripping her hips with a fierceness as he claimed her for his. 
Moments later, he pulled her boneless body in his arms and tucked her into his chest, tugging the covers over them and curving his front to her back. He held her tightly as the morning light streamed through the windows. 
Battling to keep her eyes open, thoughts of work slithered in, but it kept flittering away with her consciousness before she could dwell on it. Maybe just for a minute, she thought. But Jamie smelled so good, and his tender strokes enticed a hazy sleep to claim her muscles, dragging her down into the dark. Just one minute. 
As she eased into sleep, his whisper drifted toward her unconscious. "It's still early, Sassenach. Sleep a wee bit more. Your wee surprise will come soon enough."
..........
Claire woke for the second time that morning with an unladylike shriek when the mattress dipped and moved. Muddled, she jackknifed into a sitting position, eyes scanning wildly around the curtain-dimmed room for a trespasser. Claire knew someone was there, her gut instinct telling her it wasn't Jamie. Summoning her eyes to refocus, she collapsed with relief when she realised who it was sat at the foot of the bed.
"Surprise!" Annalise squealed, clapping her hands.
"Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ!" She swiped her bedraggled hair out of her face. "You scared me bloody witless."
"Bloody hell, you're jumpy." Annalise shifted a hip on the bed. "Jamie's bad dreams rubbing off on you now, are they?"
"That's not something to joke about," she glowered at her friend, pulling the covers up to her chin.
Annalise' smile waned a bit. "Hey, what's up? I'm not making fun of Jamie's nightmares, and you know that." Her shoulders slumped. "In case you don't know, bad dreams can happen to anyone. In fact, I had a bad dream a few days ago. I was being chased by a pirate."
Suddenly feeling bad for snapping at her friend, she mentally dispersed the sleep fog in her brain and gave Annalise an apologetic smile. So this was her surprise, she thought. Not that Claire wasn't happy to see her friend, but she'd expected Jamie's surprise to be a romantic weekend with him. She let out a sigh. "Chased by a pirate, huh? Let me guess ...sunken chest and no booty?"
Annalise perked up at Claire's feeble attempt to sound less grumpy. "Har de har har! I didn't realise you could be funny before coffee. A total package for a marauding pirate if I may say so."
"Tell that to Captain Beard," she mumbled, getting out of bed. 
"Aye, matey!" Annalise mischievously winked. "That's if he happens to be in Isle of Harris this weekend. Which is where, by the way, we're going, as in, now! So get packing!"
Claire stilled and shook her head. "Wot?" She began to shake her head, tugging the covers around her as she made her way to the dresser. "Oh no, no, no! I'm not leaving this place for any man or woman, including you, blondie! I've got a pile of work to do. You know I have deadlines."
"Oh no, you don't. You stop right there, missy! Have you forgotten you agreed with Jamie to take a weekend break?" 
Claire's eyes widened. "Oh, did he also tell you how he got me to agree?"
"No. But you can tell me later on the plane."
"Plane?" Claire dropped her face in her hands. "Oh, God, I can't believe I agreed to this. Jamie never told me anything."
Annalise stood up from where she was sitting and crossed her arms across her chest. "Hmmm, you don't look too happy to be spending time with me."
She puffed out a breath. "It's not that ..."
"We haven't had girly time in ages, Claire. Jamie thought it would do you a world of good to have a bit of fun."
"So now what? You and Jamie plotting and ganging up on me behind my back, is that it?" Claire accused. "What about Willie? Surely, you miss him more than me. When was the last time you saw him?"
Annalise grinned. "Don't worry about Willie. We have been doing a lot of catching up all night last night, and you want to know what he did?"
Claire's face crumpled in disgust as she held up a hand. "Oh, gross! Too much information. I don't want to hear about your sex life."
Annalise laughed out loud. "Fine, I won't discuss our sex life if you start packing now. Besides, you wouldn't want to waste the tickets Jamie worked so hard for, now, do you?"
Oh dear Lord, save me from well-meaning friends! She didn't really want to leave, but if Jamie had spent money organising this trip, she wasn't about to let it go to waste. But ... "How about uncle Lamb? He came to see me, and I can't just leave him."
"He knows all about the trip, and I've been told he's got a few excursions planned around the Highlands." 
"Oh, well ...if that's the case, I need to call Mary and John and let them know what I'm up to this weekend."
Annalise grinned. "Jamie's sorted it already."
"Wot?" she exclaimed with disbelief, her hands landing onto her hips. "Jamie's been planning this with you all along, hasn't he?" She shook her head. "I-I can't believe it!"
"You better believe it."
Claire blew out a breath of exasperation. "Fine! Grab my suitcase. It's in the airing cupboard."
"Yay!" Annalise whirled on her feet and pumped her fist in the air. Claire couldn't help but smile as enthusiasm began to wiggle its way through her system. Maybe Jamie was right. She owed it to herself to have a break, and probably a change of scenery was what she needed. After Mary had delivered the goods, Claire had worked herself to the bone all week and sometimes into the wee hours of the morning. She was already in her second round of edits on the extensive manuscripts Mary had submitted and must admit they were indeed making progress. As for Tom, her job with him was done, and the team organised by John should be arriving next week. It was definitely time for a bit of fun. 
On second thoughts, though it was generous of Jamie to arrange the trip, it would have been nice if he could come along too. But the idea of Jamie's condition worsening with something as simple as weekend trips away brought a feeling of melancholy to descend upon her. She had no doubt Jamie would be cured, and they'd be able to travel together one day, so she forced herself to shake off the momentary bout of wistfulness when Annalise came bounding back with her small suitcase.
"So ...you talked to Jamie. Where is he, by the way?" she asked, grabbing clothes from the dresser and throwing them in the bed. "He left early this morning."
"Oh! Jamie said he needed to be somewhere important, and he'll see you when we return. Willie will be driving us to the airport." When Claire frowned, Annalise came up behind her and laid a hand on her shoulder. "Hey, we'll only be away for two days, and you'll see him again Sunday night."
It was apparent to Claire she'd been at a disadvantage waking up to the news of the weekend trip because if Jamie had suggested it a few days ago, she would have definitely put her foot down and refused. Unfortunately, Annalise and Jamie knew her too well; hence they'd planned this trip in secrecy.
Claire absorbed that for a few heartbeats and felt a tad of guilt. It had been a while she'd spent time with Annalise, and once her job was done in London, she'd be living with Jamie. Plus, who knew when she'd have another chance to hang out with her best friend ...just the two of them and in the Isle of Harris at that. Besides, they always had a great time together. There was no sense in spoiling their spontaneous weekend with her stubbornness. She might as well make the most of it.
Claire turned to face her friend and smiled. "Do I have time to shower?"
"Plenty of time," Annalise beamed. "While you get ready, I'll make some coffee. I know what you're like without your cuppa first thing." And with that, she danced out of the room, whistling, leaving Claire to shake her head in amusement.
Later that morning, as they drove past the motorway exit for the airport, Claire shifted restlessly in the backseat of Willie's car, watching the familiar structure pass by in a blur outside her window. She frowned. Willie must have forgotten to take the turn. Uh oh! But before she could say anything, Willie veered to a different dual-carriageway. She tried to relax back into her seat, thinking there was probably a different route to the airport she didn't know of.
Eventually, they pulled to a stop in front of a building that didn't resemble a terminal, but there was an airfield and a charter plane coming out of the hangar. When Willie stepped out of the car, a man with worn jeans, a black leather jacket and a pair of aviators waved. He looked kind of familiar, but Claire was unsure.
"Who is that?" Claire asked quietly.
Annalise followed her line of vision. "Oh, I thought you knew that guy." She frowned when Claire shook her head and squinted to get a better look. "I was told the guy flying our plane was the soon to be famous Highlands' ultimate guide to Scotland." As if on cue, the man removed his aviators and started walking towards their car, a smile plastered to his unshaven face. When he waved at them, Annalise giggled, and Claire's eyes widened in confusion. "You probably can't recognise him from afar ...it's your author, Tom Christie," Annalise announced with a satisfied smile and to her utmost shock. "He's flying us to Stornoway."
What the bloody hell? Jamie arranged this?
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 Dear Readers,
Thank you all for your readership and the feedback from the previous chapter. I'm super thrilled a lot of you enjoyed it after what I put you all through with Jamie and Claire's roller-coaster journey. I hope it was worth it all in the end.
Speaking of the end, the next chapter will be the last for this arc, and after taking a break, I will start arc three of the WONDERWALL series. I'll keep you updated here. Meanwhile, feel free to speculate what the next chapter will be. Until my next update, wishing you all good health and vibes. X
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newcatwords · 3 years
Text
where is hawai'i? can you point to it on a map?
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if someone asks you to point to hawai'i on a map, where would you point?
before colonization, there was (and continues to be) an island called "hawai'i". the entire chain of islands is called "hawaii" and there is a state called "hawaii" made up of a large number of those islands.
now, because there are too many things named "hawaii," the island of hawai'i is often called "the big island", because o'ahu, the island where the city of honolulu is located, is what many people think of when they think of "hawaii". it's a mess.
on top of that, we have the "main hawaiian islands" (aka "southeastern islands" aka "windward islands") vs the "outer islands" (aka "northwestern islands" aka "leeward islands").
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most maps of "hawaii" show only the "main" islands. the map above (created by USGS) shows more of the hawaiian islands, but omits the names of two of the islands in the "main" chain: lana'i & kaho'olawe. these are not insignificant omissions. lana'i is 98% owned by larry ellison, founder & chairman of oracle corporation. kaho'olawe has been relentlessly used & abused by the west. it has been used for ranchland, military training, and most notably, as a munitions testing site, resulting in the continued contamination of the island. after many years of protests & lawsuits by native hawaiians, the island is now only accessible by native hawaiians for cultural, spiritual, & subsistence reasons.
meanwhile, this tourist mug with a creepy colonial-style map of hawaii includes both kaho'olawe & lana'i. good job, tourist mug!
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there are actually over a hundred islands in the hawaiian archipelago. the state of hawaii includes 137 of them (source). midway atoll (made up of 3 islands) is part of the archipelago, but not part of the state. it is one of america's territories: an unorganized unincorporated territory.
additionally, some of the islands "are too small to appear on maps, and others, such as Maro Reef, only appear above the water's surface during times of low tide. Others, such as Shark and Skate islands, have completely eroded away." [source: wikipedia page "list of islands of hawaii"].
in the course of writing this post, i failed to find a map that shows & names all the hawaiian islands and failed to even find a list of all of them (plus if an island only appears sometimes or has disappeared entirely, what do you even do with that?). if you find either or both of those, let me know in comments.
so where and what "hawaii" is remains a mystery.
but this has not prevented commercial & official interests from using maps of "hawaii" in all kinds of places! here on the islands, hawaii map imagery is all around.
maps are very common on tourist items:
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the hawaiian telcom logo uses dots roughly arranged in the pattern of the islands on a map:
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but i guess only five islands are worth including (i understand. branding needs come above all else!).
this souvenir cloth item is interesting because it includes all the main islands (including ni'ihau, lana'i, and kaho'olawe - which are often excluded), but smooshes them into the available space without much consideration for where they are in relation to each other:
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the postcard above has the main islands in their rough places, but squishes them all together so that they fit in the space. also the islands are made more similar in size to each other so that you can better see the little illustrations.
here's a more "official" map to show where the islands "should be" in relation to each other, and their sizes relative to each other (although both of those can change depending on what projection the map uses):
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in my mind, though, the ultimate hawaii map fantasy lives on the ubiquitous reusable walmart cloth bag (available for 50 cents at checkout to all who have forgotten to bring the right number of bags. there's a plastic shopping bag ban in hawaii.):
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in the walmart commercial universe (wcu), the only islands that exist are islands that have a walmart. the general outlines of the islands & their general orientation is preserved (along with a rough topology too!), attempting to convey a sense of adhering to a recognizable reality, but islands without a walmart have been not only omitted, but the space where they would be has been eliminated as well - as if they were never there to begin with. in the walmart version of reality, what makes something "hawaii" is whether or not it has a walmart on it.
i've had a lot of time to think about this remarkable image because i have a whole bunch of these bags. this is the bag of the people - everyone uses it for everything. the one in the above photo is in a typical state - pretty rough - because it probably came from the side of the road. you can almost always find one on the side of the road. so wherever you are, you are probably within sight of the walmart version of the islands.
so why does it matter whether or not you can point to "hawaii" on a map? well, maps are political documents, meaning that they reflect the vision of whoever has the power to put the map in front of your eyes. so if you're the one with the power to make some of the most commonly-seen maps of hawaii and you decide to remove a few islands, well that can really shape what people think "hawaii" is! we're a sea of islands - many people here have only ever been to one or two of the islands. if it wasn't on the map, you might not know that it existed at all.
hawaii is incredibly important to the united states, not just for tourism, but in terms of global strategy. it's the largest outpost of american power in the middle of the pacific. it puts america & its troops half an ocean closer to some of america's biggest competitors, most notably, china. it's a springboard to all the other island territories of the pacific (which you maybe haven't heard of because they almost never appear on maps):
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once you see a map of all of america's territories in the pacific, along with the exclusive economic zones (eez) that extend out for 200 miles around each island, you start to get a better feel for the extent of america's power in the pacific.
when a place is left off the map, it can be easy to make it (including its people!) invisible. so if you're america, with bases across the islands of the pacific, with a nightmarish history of atomic weapons testing in the pacific (rendering islands uninhabitable and leaving both land and waters too contaminated for people to use), perhaps you might not want some of these places to appear on the map.
in Foreign Policy in Focus, Khury Petersen-Smith writes:
"Many of us living in North America who are concerned about climate change, for example, have a sense that Pacific Islands are facing particularly severe impacts from rising sea levels. But that knowledge tends to be vague and limited, as actual residents of these islands are rarely invited to the table to speak for themselves.
This is not accidental. Commenting during the Nixon administration on U.S. nuclear testing in the Marshall Islands, which share the same region of the Pacific as Guam, Henry Kissinger said “there are only 90,000 people out there. Who gives a damn?”
The U.S. has long had an interest in Marshallese and other Pacific Islanders remaining “out there” in the American mind. This marginalization helps allow the U.S. to carry out military operations in the region, along with policies that further climate change and other harms, while keeping most Americans unaware of these practices’ impacts in the Pacific." [FPIF]
often hawai'i (and alaska - which is in many ways similar to hawai'i in its relation to the contiguous US) doesn't even appear on national maps of the USA.
here's a screenshot from the new york times homepage on march 21, 2020, just as the coronavirus pandemic was beginning to spread:
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there is no alaska and no hawai'i on those maps. so if you were looking for information on the most important issue that was happening at the time, and you live in or are concerned about hawai'i and/or alaska, there would just be nothing. and what does it say about the people who run the top newspaper in america that they decided it was fine to omit these two states? are they not states? do they not matter? do the readers in those states not matter? and this is not an unusual thing at all. it happens all the time.
i'd like to finish by sharing with you a poem by CHamoru poet Craig Santos Perez. CHamoru are the indigenous people of the mariana islands (which include guam, saipan, tinian, rota, and others).
in this poem, Craig Santos Perez writes about not appearing on the map...
“Off-Island CHamorus”
My family migrated to California when I was 15 years old. During the first day at my new high school, the homeroom teacher asked: “Where are you from?” “The Mariana Islands,” I answered. He replied: “I’ve never heard of that place. Prove it exists.” And when I stepped in front of the world map on the wall, it transformed into a mirror: the Pacific Ocean, like my body, was split in two and flayed to the margins. I found Australia, then the Philippines, then Japan. I pointed to an empty space between them and said: “I’m from this invisible archipelago.” Everyone laughed. And even though I descend from oceanic navigators, I felt so lost, shipwrecked
on the coast of a strange continent. “Are you a citizen?” he probed. “Yes. My island, Guam, is a U.S. territory.” We attend American schools, eat American food, listen to American music, watch American movies and television, play American sports, learn American history, dream American dreams, and die in American wars. “You speak English well,” he proclaimed, “with almost no accent.” And isn’t that what it means to be a diasporic CHamoru: to feel foreign in a domestic sense.
Over the last 50 years, CHamorus have migrated to escape the violent memories of war; to seek jobs, schools hospitals, adventure, and love; but most of all, we’ve migrated for military service, deployed and stationed to bases around the world. According to the 2010 census, 44,000 CHamorus live in California, 15,000 in Washington, 10,000 in Texas, 7,000 in Hawaii, and 70,000 more in every other state and even in Puerto Rico. We are the most “geographically dispersed” Pacific Islander population within the United States, and off-island CHamorus now outnumber our on-island kin, with generations having been born away from our ancestral homelands, including my daughters.
Some of us will be able to return home for holidays, weddings, and funerals; others won’t be able to afford the expensive plane ticket to the Western Pacific. Years and even decades might pass between trips, and each visit will feel too short. We’ll lose contact with family and friends, and the island will continue to change until it becomes unfamiliar to us. And isn’t that, too, what it means to be a diasporic CHamoru: to feel foreign in your own homeland.
Even after 25 years, there are still times I feel adrift, without itinerary or destination. When I wonder: What if we stayed? What if we return? When the undertow of these questions begins pulling you out to sea, remember: migration flows through our blood like the aerial roots of the banyan tree. Remember: our ancestors taught us how to carry our culture in the canoes of our bodies. Remember: our people, scattered like stars, form new constellations when we gather. Remember: home is not simply a house, village, or island; home is an archipelago of belonging.
–Craig Santos Perez
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thank you for reading this post! please let me know if you see any errors.
if you'd like to learn more about some important issues in the pacific, here are just a few:
july 2, 2020: "US says leaking nuclear waste dome is safe; Marshall Islands leaders don't believe it" - Los Angeles Times
may 30, 2021: "Pacific Plunder: this is who profits from the mass extraction of the region's natural resources." - The Guardian
april 5, 2021: "75 years after nuclear testing in the Pacific began, the fallout continues to wreak havoc" - The Conversation
june 4, 2021: "Guam won’t give up more land to the U.S. military without a fight" - The World (radio program)
aug. 24, 2021: "The US is building a military base in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. Micronesian residents have questions." - The World (radio program)
and if you'd like to learn more about how maps are political, here are a couple articles:
june 5, 2014: "The politics of making maps" by Amanda Ruggeri, for BBC
july 11, 2018: "Politics and Cartography: The Power of Deception through Distortion" by John Erskine, for the Carnegie Ethics Online Monthly Column
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route22ny · 3 years
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BY MICHAEL J. MOONEY | PHOTOGRAPHS BY DAVE SHAFER
Staring at the front of the Royal Theater, I feel as though I’m looking backward through time. Taking in the cerulean marquee, the painted red fringe around the box office, the vertical ROYAL sign jutting into the afternoon sky—it’s easy to imagine why the denizens of Archer County flocked here for decades. The theater was a dark, cool respite from the blazing sun, a still escape from the whipping winds of the North Central Plains, a glimpse of entertainment from the outside world.
The theater—or what’s left of it anyway—peers out from the northeast corner of the town square. Without the storied theater, this could be any small town in Texas. Weathered barns and rusted oil pumps dot the landscape. Anchoring the town is the imposing three-story Romanesque Revival county courthouse, with stone archways and provincial peaks. There’s also a small café (Murn’s), a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it police station, a few antiques stores, and a single four-way stoplight swaying in the breeze like an apparition.
The Royal Theater as it is now and as it was then.
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This isn’t just any small town in Texas, though. Archer City is the Texas small town. It’s the setting of both the novel and film versions of The Last Picture Show, a coming-of-age story rendered in black and white that earned eight Academy Award nominations, including Best Writing (Adapted Screenplay), Best Directing, and Best Picture. In Larry McMurtry’s book, published in 1966, the town is called Thalia. In the movie, directed by Peter Bogdanovich and released in 1971, it’s called Anarene—a name taken from an abandoned town 8 miles away. But rest assured, both places are Archer City: the looming courthouse, the blinking stoplight, and the Royal Theater, where so many of the most dramatic moments of The Last Picture Show take place.
The novel, which McMurtry called a “spiteful” book intended to “lance some of the poisons of small-town life,” received critical acclaim when it was published. But it was Bogdanovich’s film that truly introduced the entire world, in utterly unromanticized fashion, to the intense, sweeping sagas of everyday life in Archer City. The Last Picture Show turned this particular and peculiar town into art.
Both the novel and movie contain language that was considered lewd at the time. McMurtry’s own mother, Hazel, once said that after reading the first 100 pages she hid the book in the closet and called her son that night. “Larry, honey,” she said to him, he revealed in his 2002 travel memoir Paradise, “is this what we’re sending you to Rice for? Those awful words!”
The film, with its nudity and frank depiction of teenage sexuality—including Cybill Shepherd’s first and only topless scene—absolutely scandalized upright, moral Americans all over the country. Nowhere more so than in Archer City, where it was regarded at the time as a “dirty” movie.
Now, 50 years after the film’s release, the town’s past dalliances with Hollywood are somehow simultaneously scuttled and omnipresent. There’s no billboard at the city limit announcing the place’s cultural significance, no notation on the water tower. But there are echoes of the art formed here, about this place, along every street, around every corner. Some might even feel the spirit of McMurtry, who passed away in Archer City earlier this year.
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Over the last five decades, Peter Bogdanovich, a New Yorker who operated in Los Angeles, has told the story of the movie’s origin many times. He’d seen the novel in a store, liked the title, saw what it was about, and immediately put the book back down. Then actor Sal Mineo, who’d starred alongside James Dean and Natalie Wood in Rebel Without a Cause, gave Bogdanovich a copy of the novel, saying he thought it would make a good film. Bogdanovich still didn’t read it, but gave it to his wife, production designer Polly Platt, and asked her to read it. When she inspired him to finally read it himself, he was intrigued by the challenge of conveying small-town life in Texas and eventually co-wrote the screenplay with McMurtry. Bogdanovich, Platt, and McMurtry took a long road trip scouting locations in Texas, but ultimately the director realized he wanted to shoot the movie in McMurtry’s hometown.
Set in the early 1950s, the story follows three teenagers—the co-captains of the football team and the so-called prettiest girl in school—through their senior year of high school, as they each struggle to make sense of adult concepts like love and sex and the fragility of human life. Sonny Crawford is the sensitive, thoughtful boy from a broken home. Duane Jackson is Sonny’s lovelorn best friend who escapes first into the oil fields and then the Korean War. Jacy Farrow is the coquettish rich girl who yearns wholeheartedly for something beyond the confines of her surroundings. The Last Picture Show also famously includes an ensemble of carefully rendered adults trying to cope with their own expired dreams and broken lives.
McMurtry repeated over the years that the characters he created weren’t based on any real-life individuals, but the people of Archer City always suspected otherwise. A man named Bobby Stubbs, who was photographed with McMurtry in their high school yearbook, believed he was the inspiration for Sonny. Stubbs had a troubled home life and worked nights like Sonny, and he drove the same kind of pickup truck. He was also once hit in the eye by the boyfriend of a girl he liked. “It kinda pretty closely followed me,” Stubbs used to say.
A woman named Ceil Cleveland Footlick was often asked if she was the inspiration for Jacy. She was “very good friends” (her words) with Stubbs and had been voted “Most Beautiful Girl” in her class. For years she brushed off the question, but in 1997 she published a memoir with the title Whatever Happened to Jacy Farrow?
Because of the book’s reputation, getting actors to audition was a challenge. Randy Quaid was cast as Lester, an awkward, sleazy suitor of Jacy’s. He’d only read the parts of the script that involved his character, which mostly centered on Lester taking Jacy to a naked swimming party. “I just thought it was going to be like this B-movie, teenage, soft-porn movie,” Quaid would later say. “Something you’d see at the drive-in.”
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None of the young stars had much experience in film. Timothy Bottoms, who’d only been in one movie before, was cast to play Sonny. Jeff Bridges, cast as Duane, had been a professional actor nearly all his life, but at 21 years old, this would be his first major film role. And Bogdanovich cast Shepherd as Jacy after seeing her face on the cover of Glamour magazine.
Most of the adults in the movie were played by established Hollywood actors, including Cloris Leachman, Ellen Burstyn, and Eileen Brennan. For the role of Sam the Lion, the wisdom-dispensing owner of the town’s pool hall, Bogdanovich cast Ben Johnson, the champion-rodeo-cowboy-turned-stuntman-turned-Western-movie-icon. At first Johnson turned down the part on account of the foul language, but Bogdanovich called in a favor from his director friend John Ford, who convinced Johnson to do it.
Almost as soon as filming started, real life began imitating the art being created. While making a movie about illicit sex and barely veiled scandal, the set was awash in illicit sex and barely veiled scandal. The actors spent a lot of time drinking and smoking together in their hotel rooms 30 minutes north in Wichita Falls, and that led to drama. Bottoms fell in love with Shepherd. Bogdanovich started an affair with Shepherd, dissolving his own marriage while his wife, Platt, continued to work on the movie. (Most mornings Platt styled Shepherd’s hair.) “It was quite a soap opera,” Burstyn said in the documentary Picture This: The Times of Peter Bogdanovich in Archer City, Texas.
This was everything the locals had feared: all the immoral luridness of Hollywood, right here in a part of Texas not so comfortable with unwholesomeness that didn’t stay behind closed doors.
Outside of Archer City, it was a different story. The movie received great reviews from coast to coast. Johnson won the Oscar for Actor in a Supporting Role and Leachman won for Actress in a Supporting Role. The film is still beloved today and maintains a spot in the coveted National Film Registry.
But at the time of its release, most of the locals disapproved. Strongly. The Los Angeles Times ran a story about it with the headline “Movie Riles Town It Depicts.” McMurtry, who was involved in Bogdanovich’s vision, eventually got so annoyed by the vicious gossip in town that he sent a letter to the editor of the Archer City newspaper, challenging anyone in town to a public debate.
His offer went unrequited.
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Archer City’s population is 1,848, only a couple hundred larger than it was when McMurtry grew up there in the ’30s and ’40s. The town is the seat of Archer County, created in 1858 by the Texas State Legislature and named after Branch Tanner Archer, former secretary of war of the Republic of Texas. Ranching and oil have long been the predominant industries—by late 1926, there were more than 400 oil wells within 13 miles of Archer City—but many people are increasingly attracted to the town for its proximity to prime hunting.
Many of the locations where The Last Picture Show was filmed are gone now. Where Sam’s dusty pool hall once stood, with its door flapping in the wind, there’s nothing but an empty dirt lot. The Rig-Wam Drive Inn, the burger joint where Jacy dangled french fries over Duane’s head as if he was a trained seal, is just a plot of asphalt and patchy grass. The West-Tex Theater in the neighboring town of Olney, used for the interior movie theater scenes, was torn down in the mid-’80s. Today it’s a small, quiet park with a gazebo.
Some places are still here, but different. The restaurant where Brennan’s character worked turned into Booked Up No. 4, one of four bookstores McMurtry set up around the town square before shuttering all but one in 2012. The high school has some of the same old features, though it’s been updated and decorated with a handful of granite statues marking state titles the school has won through the years.
Much of the town looks and acts remarkably like it did when The Last Picture Show was made. Boys about the age of Duane and Sonny still speed through town in pickup trucks. Men the age of Sam the Lion still stop them to talk about football. The dance hall at the American Legion, where Jacy and Duane twirled around the room and Sonny ran into his estranged father, looks like it could host the same event today. On a recent evening, four or five locals were perched on barstools, sipping cold beers, listening to songs on the jukebox. They got rid of the old Wurlitzer years ago, but the updated digital version there now still plays all the Hank Williams Sr. songs from the movie.
In time, feelings in Archer City softened a bit. Mostly, the people here don’t talk much about the movie, or about McMurtry, the town’s most famous son. You can spend all morning at Murn’s Café and all night at the American Legion, the only bar in town, and never hear The Last Picture Show mentioned once. It’s not the source of tension it once was.
The public change of heart was most apparent in 1989, nearly 20 years after The Last Picture Show was filmed, when Bogdanovich returned to Archer City to shoot the sequel, Texasville, based on a book of the same name by McMurtry. This time the townspeople lined up to participate as extras. People came from miles away to sell concessions or to take photos or just get a glimpse of the nearly $20 million production.
“The bad taste that the movie left for some folks, that’s gone now,” then-high school principal Nat Lunn told the Austin American-Statesman at the time. “Especially with money being short in town, they’re ready for another dose of Hollywood.”
By the late 1980s, the three leads in the first film—Bottoms, Bridges, and Shepherd—had all become stars. While the entire budget for the first movie was around $1.3 million, Shepherd alone was paid $1.5 million to reprise her role. Bridges was reportedly paid $1.75 million. Bottoms, who’d complained publicly about Bogdanovich and said he didn’t like any of his co-stars, would only agree to return if he was given an additional $100,000 to fund the Picture This documentary.
In the two decades since the first movie, Bogdanovich’s career had soared and crashed. He and Shepherd had broken up; he went on to have multiple relationships, and she had two divorces. Bottoms was also divorced and remarried, but on the set he confessed the crush he’d had on Shepherd. Platt returned, too, and brought the 21-year-old daughter she and Bogdanovich shared. It became a grand, twisted Hollywood reunion, right there on the streets of Archer City.
Drawn by the potential spectacle of what was by then some sort of love-octagon, media outlets from across the country sent reporters to town. There were long feature stories in both Entertainment Weekly and the Los Angeles Times. By all accounts, though, the entire production served as a therapeutic experience, healing the wounds of the past. At one press conference, the often-sullen Bottoms hugged Bogdanovich. Behind-the-scenes footage caught Shepherd hugging Bottoms. Residents of Archer County took photos of themselves on the set.
But when the movie was released, it tanked. It received middling reviews, earned back only a fraction of its budget, and even today it’s not easy to find on any of the major streaming services.
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A lot of people associated with The Last Picture Show are dead now. Stubbs, who claimed to be the basis for Sonny, died in 1992. Johnson in 1996. Sam Bottoms, the real-life younger brother of Timothy Bottoms who played the mute boy Billy, died in 2008. Platt, the producer and production designer who somehow never pulled Shepherd’s hair, died in 2011. Then Brennan in 2013.
In January of this year, Footlick, the woman who wrote about being the real Jacy Farrow, died in North Carolina. Leachman died almost two weeks later. And on March 25, McMurtry, the writer who created all this beautiful trouble, died at the age of 84.
A few days after his death, nobody answered the doorbell at his house in Archer City, a majestic, three-story mansion just down the road from the high school. Looking through the front window, everything seemed to me to be just the way he left it, from the table made from a giant dinosaur fossil to the towering shelves of books in every room. McMurtry bought this place, the biggest home in town, after he won the Pulitzer Prize for Lonesome Dove. He’d wake up early in the morning, type for an hour and a half or so at his long oak table, then go to the bookstore to price antiquarian volumes. Most of the locals would leave him alone.
On the house’s front porch, a single rocking chair was situated to look out over the front yard into the surrounding neighborhood. Someone sitting there could see the comings and goings of a lot of people. As the early-evening wind moved through, the chair began to rock ever so gently.
These days, I sense the people of Archer City think differently of The Last Picture Show. It’s a part of the town’s story, just like the cattle industry and state titles. The movie is even mentioned on the town’s website, though it’s certainly not prominent.
There’s also a tiny park just off the square with a fiberglass horse covered in brands from local ranches and a display that chronicles a bit of the town’s history. The welded metal wall has separate panels for the town’s founding, the first successful oil well drilled here, and the giant fire that swept through in 1925. There’s also a panel explaining how the town was the filming location for The Last Picture Show and Texasville. Bogdanovich’s last name is misspelled.
A couple hundred feet away is the Royal Theater. Most of the building is a burned-out hull, popular for weddings, photo shoots, and occasional performances. The front of the building has been restored, though. It looks just like it did in the movie, the image that begins and ends the film. It’s haunting and beautiful, weathered and damaged—but still here, still standing, still looking at that single blinking light swaying in the wind.
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The Last Picture Show wasn’t the first movie based on a novel by Larry McMurtry, and it certainly wasn’t the last. You might besurprised by just how many films and TV shows have been made from his novels. Here are a few:
Hud, 1963 (based on Horseman, Pass By) The Last Picture Show, 1971 Lovin’ Molly, 1974 (based on Leaving Cheyenne) Terms of Endearment, 1983 Lonesome Dove, 1989 Texasville, 1990 The Evening Star, 1996
https://texashighways.com/culture/how-the-last-picture-show-changed-the-worlds-view-of-small-town-texas/
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