#i love things i like and i love curation. you can imagine how crazy curating things i like has been for me

[daydreamingtomatos]

if tumblr dies im remaking my twitter but tbh itll mostly just be weird porn. after the remake not before

[mykoreanlove]

Livin‘ together

„Whoa, this place is the definition of extravagance“, you muttered under your breath as you entered the apartment. Felix giggled and placed a sweet kiss on top of your head. „Bin and Jinnie definitely like the lavish life, princess.“

It was the first time that Changbin and Hyunjin invited you over to check out their new place. After moving in together they took their sweet time to make sure that every corner represents them both equally. This apartment felt like a copious mansion, not like a semi-spaced convo in the midst of Seoul.

„So? You like it??“, Hyunjin beamed at you expectantly. „Jinnie, I have no words“, you shook your head laughing. „Oh just wait, you haven’t even seen half of it!“ Hyunjin grabbed your hand and ushered you out of the room, eager to show you the rest of his carefully curated private universe.

„Ah, there goes my love“, Felix joked playfully as his hand grabbed his heart. Changbin handed him a cold beer before sitting down next to him. „Speaking of, how’s it going?“

Felix and you had moved in weeks ago. After dating for a couple of months you took a leap of faith and packed your bags, moving into his comfortable place. Even though things were still fresh, they were also chaotic and challenging at times.

„It’s going good“, Felix replied, trying his best to convince his older friend. „Lix, please. I practically raised you, there’s no fooling me. What’s wrong?“

Felix sighed and took a big sip of his beer. „It’s just… most of the times we’re good. Great, actually. I love y/n and being with her makes me so, so happy. But living together brought new problems, as well as highlighting existing ones.

„What do you mean?“, Changbin tried to follow. Felix was strongly focused on finding the right words to describe the dilemma you were in, he didn’t even notice you and Hyunjin coming back.

„Hanging up portraits of yourself is totally relatable, y/nnie. That doesn’t make me narcissistic at all. If any, it makes me royal!“ You bursted out laughing at his silly remarks but quickly lost your upbeat endeavour as you noticed the stern expression on your boyfriend‘s face. Quickly, you grabbed Hyunjin and hid behind the door, signalling for him to wait.

„Why are we eavesdropping on them?“, he asked bewildered. „Pssshht“, you asked him to be quiet which made him wince in annoyance.

You nodded your head in Felix‘ direction and asked him to listen. „I’ve lived in dorms with you guys for ages, right? I’m used to sharing a place but y/n, she’s new to this. She always used to live on her own, so we’re having trouble…adjusting to one another.“

„Oooooh, I get it. She’s messy!“ Changbin laughed giddily. Felix rolled his eyes, knowing damn well what his friend was referring to. Felix was the epitome of his star sign: known for being borderline neat and tidy.

„Hyung, it’s not that bad but sometimes she drives me crazy. Like when I’m coming back from work and our apartment looks like shit? Yeah, that gets me“, he admitted. „Lix, come on. She’s a girl. How bad can it be?“

Changbin opened another beer and handed it to Felix.

„Imagine coming home and finding worn clothes all over the place. All lights are on but there’s no one home. Imagine not being able to find a single cup because they’re all broken or dirty. Try brushing your teeth with an empty toothpaste because the last one had been emptied but never replaced. And then, once you make it to the bedroom you’re greeted with tousled sheets because nobody bothered to make the bed. Who lives like that?“

Hyunjin glanced your way and mouthed his visible disgust. „Ewwwwwww!“

„Oh, shut up“, you mouthed back and closed your eyes. Suddenly, you felt the room spinning. You’ve always been ashamed of your messiness but hearing the love of your life struggling because of it made you feel worse. You had had those conversations with him, he would explain his side of things and asked you to be more considerate and help out but those talks always ended the same way: you bawling your eyes out, fearing the worst.

„Damn, bro. Sounds tough“, Changbin remarked. „That’s not even the worst part“, Felix continued. „What is then?“ Felix took another sip before explaining further.

„Every time I try to talk to her about it, it ends up with her crying and questioning everything.“ Changbin had trouble keeping up. „Questioning?“ „Our relationship. Our love, even“, Felix explained, his voice tinted with sadness.

Hyunjin‘s eyes filled with tears which he quickly wiped away. He had no idea you were struggling like this. After all those years of being friends, why didn’t you talk to him?

Your head fell against the wall, defeated. It didn’t take you long to think back to the most recent argument.

„Lixie, how can you even love me??“, you shouted at him. This fight had been going on for hours but you weren’t thinking about stopping. „What?“, he asked in disbelief. „I mean it! I never put away my clothes, I always leave on all of the lights, break all our cups and never think of making the bed or buying toothpaste. Why would you want to be with someone like me? Clearly, I’m not good enough for you!“

There it was. The elephant in the room. Finally, you had articulated your deepest thoughts.

„Shit, really? I had no idea y/n felt that way about you“, Changbin replied shocked. „Yeah“, Felix sighed heavily. He had no problem arguing about chores, after all he was the most patient guy in the world. But arguing about you being worthy of his love truly gnarled at his soul. „So, did you talk it out?“

„I tried to. Tried to tell her multiple times that I love her for who she is, flaws and all included. Tried telling her that those things we argue about are minuscule and that we will find a way to make it work. Tried telling her how happy she makes me and she’s more than enough for me. I really tried…“

„But it didn’t get through to her?“, Changbin asked. „No, but I thought of another way.“

„Oh my god“, you muttered under your breath. Hyunjin looked at you expectantly. „What?“, he whispered. Panicked, you started rummaging through your bag, searching for the love notes Felix had left you the last couple days. „What are those?“, Hyunjin asked as he saw you pulling out blue post its. You handed them over without saying a word, too emotional because of your boyfriend‘s sweetness.

Honestly, if I had to pick up after anyone, I’m glad it’s you, y/n. Your clothes may be all over the place, but my heart is all over you.

„Lix wrote that for you?“, he asked impressed. You nodded silently. „That note was placed among my clothes. I found it when I wanted to do laundry“, you explained. Hyunjin nodded proudly, reading the next one.

You light up my life in more ways than one- though we might need to work on the electricity bill. But honestly, baby, I love that you leave a little brightness behind wherever you go.

Hyunjin gasped as he looked up at you. „Taped to the lightning switch“, you whispered. Eagerly, he read the next one.

With all the cups you’ve broken, I think it’s safe to say that our love is unbreakable. As for the remaining cups, you know I like it a bit dirty ;)

„Eeeeewwwww“, Hyunjin remarked as he kept on reading. „Always knew both of you were pervs“, he rolled his eyes judging. „Oh please, I caught you jerking off to your own pictures so spare me that talk“, you stuck out your tongue confidently. Hyunjin did his best to hide his smirk, but failed miserably.

„Anyways, let’s read the next one.“

You’re so good at getting every last drop of toothpaste, but I guess that just means I get the fun of picking out the next one <3

„Let me guess - taped to the toothpaste?“ You nodded eagerly. Hyunjin and you took another glance at Felix who was still deep in conversation. When you had found all those notes, you were thrilled, deeply touched by your boyfriend‘s love for you. But you would have never guessed that he did all of this to make a point. To finally make you realize how loved you were - even if you couldn’t love yourself.

„Okay, this is my favourite one“, Hyunjin smiled.

You might never make the bed but that’s just one more reason I love you - because you’re perfectly yourself, and that’s more than enough for me.

You shared a deep look of compassion with your best friend before entering the room your boyfriend was in, promising yourself to become the best version you could be. For him, for you and your blooming love.

[autisticempathydaemon]

Hi! I’m here for the redacted boy pairing, I saw it on your blog and honestly wasn’t going to submit, until I read the questions and thought that they were super fun, unique, and interesting! The song I’m fixated on at the moment is This is what Autumn Feels Like by JVKE. The lyric I always look towards too whenever I play it is “Love is like riding a bike, scary but then it’s alright. I got the hang of it, right?” Because I feel like it’s a pretty good analogy! And I definitely relate to always wondering whether or not you’re doing something correctly 😅. My Enneagram Type is 6 apparently (I took the test just now) and I’m an ENFJ if that helps. I don’t think I’ve ever gone out of my way to listen to a ‘gargantuan YouTube essay’ but I do enjoy hearing people ramble about their interests if that’s similar! My childhood imaginary friend was Lucy from Narnia, I used to imagine that we would go horseback riding and I would run away to Narnia with her and never come back. To fall asleep I usually stay up watching shows (current obsession is criminal minds) or doing things like that and then passing out, though if I can’t sleep I usually just count until my brain shuts off. I would love the name Adrianna. I just think it’s really pretty and it has a lot of nickname options! Which is one of the few things I dislike about my current name, there are like 2 things you can call me to shorten it and one of them reminds me too much of my dad for me to feel comfortable with people using it. I think my favorite audio is either the decorating for the solstice one with David (I’m feral for the way he explains it all and then goes out of his way to tell Angel that he doesn’t want them to feel left out and that they’re the most important part of his life!!) or the one where Vincent tells Lovely about the monarchal summit (oh the foreshadowing) and about his first time there (I think it’s called Cuddling with your Vampire bf but I could be wrong). The Redacted boys I don’t get the hype for but don’t necessarily hate are Ollie (sorry dude, I’m sure you’re sweet and all but it’s just not my cup of tea) and Vega (I do actually dislike him! Everyone talks about this one video of him in the imperium but I’m too scared to watch the whole imperium and no one has given me a clear answer on what video it is that he’s not a ass). I’ve read the Lunar Chronicles (highly recommend) so many times that I practically know them by heart. I have a soft spot for twisted Fairy Tales and LET ME TELL YOU THEY DO IT SO WELL! This may be an odd answer but I’d want Damien as my best friend. I feel like we have a lot in common and I love me a sarcastic but incredibly driven kinda guy, that’s how a lot of my friends are. I don’t have a go-to topic when I tired, but everyone can tell because I start giggling like crazy, as if everything is funny 🥲. My gas station drink is the Cumberland farms slushies, I would mix the blue and red to make purple. I’m a sucker for the Spotify daily mixes tbh, bc I don’t have premium and they offer me the most amount of control as far as changing the song, replaying it, and only listening to the ones that I want to, plus it’s curated which I very much enjoy. My guilty pleasure media is probably in part Redacted 😅 but also I enjoy SOME Yandere stories that I find on like fanfic websites. And I’m talking about like ‘log this person is so dedicated to you! How fun! 🤩’ I usually scroll past when it’s like an actually ab-sive situation or senario. I really enjoyed this thank you!! 😊

Sorry this is the same person who just submitted the last ask (the one with the imaginary friend being Lucy from Narnia) and of course after I submitted I thought of some extra to add 😭 sorry for the inconvenience, I just wanted to add that I’m an Aries and a huge swifty, have a good day!!

Hmmm, this is hard because I feel like ENFJs could really work so beautifully with a lot of people- at least, Redacted people. In the end, I decided to pair the Protagonist, the natural leader, with our favorite leader, David Shaw.

After all, ENFJs, Arieses, and Sixes can be summed up as confident, principled idealists, the kind of friend who takes charge and takes care of their own. You’d be a wonderfully extroverted contrast to David, the perfect mate of the pack Alpha. I also like David for you because Sixes tend to be motivated by a desire for stability and security in their lives, and… well, c’mon. He runs a security company. I need not say more.

In addition to the pun, there’s so many cute, little things that’d be charming about your life together. Criminal Minds marathons would be so fun with David; he strikes me as the type who can always guess the UNSUB, and he feels a strong kinship with Hotch. He wouldn’t really understand the Taylor Swift hype, but that wouldn’t stop him from pulling some security connections to get you killer seats when she tours close to Dahlia.

Song:

No matter where you are, I'll be there/ We can be the generation/ Who learns how to love/ Mistakes and empty promises/ Will never be enough/ So tear apart these giant hearts/ That beat inside us now/ Let's conquer the percentages/ And rise above the crowd/ And I won't let you fall (won't let you fall)

This song is one of the most down to earth yet romantic songs I know, and that’s why I like it for you and David. Fun fact, the duo who sings this are married, and this is the song they wrote and performed as their wedding vows. That’s the kind of heart-melting, ooey gooey lovey shit that I think suits David and his partner, because that man is a sap and not good at hiding it.

Runner-Ups:

Lasko, I like for you for two reasons. One, he could use a friend and partner like you, he needs it. Two, I can see him also being a Narnia kid growing up, so that’d be a really cute thing for y’all to bond over. Geordi, I also think could use a partner like you, but honestly he’s mostly a runner up because he’s my favorite Redacted boi to headcanon as a Swiftie.

note: it’s no inconvenience at all, lovey, you’re good 💚

Read this post and send me an ask if you’d like a match-up of your own! 💌

[kirchefuchs]

so yk how in ur AU, The Narrator is an AI turned human? And Stanley is aware that The Narrator is an AI? And how Jim and TK are/were part of the development team?

Do you also remember the Lovebug Virus?

ehe

Now, I have an idea for a tiny lil oneshot (probably gonna have more than 2k words so yay!! depends on what my writer's block says tho) based off of your AU with the Lovebug Virus added to the mix

SOO IF U DON'T MIND

Could you describe how TK and Jim (and literally everybody in ur AU) are? Personality-wise, I mean. I wanna write them as in-character as I can so ye :D

please and thank youuuu!!

— 🅰️non || 05/17/2023

*cracks knuckles* Okay, here we go!

Narrator (Pollux): For the most part he's the same as how he is in the game, just a little softer. He's definitely grown very attached to Stanley over time and especially after they enter a relationship he practically melts to Stanley's touch. He's still got that iconic snark and sass, he's just softer around the edges now.

Stanley: He's a menace. He's lovely, kind, and loves to shower others with affection, but he's a scheming, mischievous little piece of trash (affectionate). He loves to cause problems. Small problems. Ones that don't really hurt anyone and can be laughed about later. He just loves to smile and have fun. He's selectively mute and primarily communicates with BSL, but when he does speak it's usually in whispers or very quietly spoken.

Timekeeper (TK): Before the Parable? They were pretty laid back but took any challenges that came their way with a fierce determination. They were very good at their job. That being coding. They are a little socially awkward so Jim would do most of the talking for the two of them. They grew to miss talking to people after they got trapped on the coding void of the Parable. After spending what felt like an eternity in near complete isolation they went a wee bit crazy, so some things they say don't make sense or their thoughts get jumbled together. They come off as very cryptic sounding. Poor guy.

Jim: He is very loud. He loves to talk (probably has adhd but has gone undiagnosed) and he adores trying out new things with his projects. He was the head of the development team so he's definitely got some people skills, and he's similar to Stanley where he likes to make harmless jokes. He's a little bit mischievous, a lot a bit funny, and he loves to make people smile. He's got one of those laughs that can very quickly turn into snorting if he's laughing hard enough. (Lowkey sounds like Ernie's laugh on sesame street)

Mariella: Imagine if Stanley were a raging lesbian. That's pretty close to what Mariella is like. Although she's a lot better at putting on a professional persona when she needs to. And she's more the type to tell really bad puns than to purposefully annoy someone like Stanley would. Because of how similar the two are, Stanley and Mariella do get along well and consider each other friends (though she tends to tease him about how long it took for him and Narry to get together).

Curator: Curie is significantly more calm and collected than Narry. She can sometimes come off as a little intimidating or strict, but she just says things as they are. She's very self aware and that helped to her and Mariella figuring out their relationship quite a bit faster than the boys (what can I say? She doesn't see the point in bottling up emotions). She often acts like a wise older sister to Narry, giving him little suggestions and encouragements when he needs them. She cares a lot about those close to her, it's just hard to see sometimes.

[superfallingstars]

for the playlist prompts how about songs you think remus would play in his classroom during his time as a dada professor? he feels like the type of teacher who would let soft music play while the students did their work or as he graded papers imo

send me playlist prompts!

Ha this one is fun! I like the idea of Lupin playing music during class - he’s already the “cool” professor, so this seems like a no-brainer! It was hard not to be influenced by the PoA movie, what with its lovely little Boggart montage set to jazz music, but I decided to roll with it and make Professor Lupin’s curiously curated lo-fi beats to relax and study to. My jazz knowledge is pretty limited (compared to my knowledge of, say, shitty 90s alternative rock bands), and I also felt like this playlist should be mostly instrumental, so I initially felt a little constrained with these selections. I ended up choosing a few lyrically topical songs, while the rest are just my personal instrumental jazz faves that I thought were fitting. Overall I’m quite pleased with how this came out – so I hope you enjoy!

Track list:

Sun Ra - I Could Have Danced All Night: I adore this entire album, it’s just so beautiful and wistful. I also find that I’m quite productive while listening to it, so I feel like it would work in a classroom setting…

Chet Baker - But Not For Me - Vocal Version: This is suuuuch a perfect Remus song to me omg. Everyone is in love except for ME and it’ll never happen for me (because I’m fundamentally unlovable because I’m a werewolf!!!)

Shira Small - Lights Gleam Lonely: Jazzy 70s pop. I love this song, I think it's sooo Lupin, and Icouldn’t resist putting it on here (also if you've seen the other playlist asks you know how obsessed I am with this album)

Dorothy Ashby - By The Time I Get to Phoenix: gorgeous 70s jazz harp (yes, harp!)

Ella Fitzgerald - No Moon At All: when I was making this playlist I was searching for jazz songs about the moon, only to find this one about how romantic it is when there is no moon, which is honestly a thousand times better than anything I could have imagined. 10/10 Remus moment

Thelonious Monk & John Coltrane - Ruby, My Dear: Gorgeous relaxing piano/saxophone song. I only know this song because Dave Malloy plays it in Ghost Quartet and if that sentence means anything to you then PLEASE TALK TO ME

Sun Ra - You Never Told Me That You Cared: from that same album as other Sun Ra one (I seriously can’t recommend it enough!). It's so crazy to feel heartbroken from an instrumental song like. This is literally just Notes and now I’m gonna start crying

Stanton Moore - Magnolia Triangle: another of my personal jazz instrumental faves. I’m just so impressed that something in 5/4 can sound this smooth and catchy

John Coltrane - My Favorite Things: this song is one of MY favorite things. The first time I heard it was because one of my teachers played it during a work period, so... rather fitting, right? Also it's SO long sorry about that

Miles Davis Quartet - That Old Devil Moon: there are plenty of vocal versions of this song, but I wasn't really feeling them... Sorry Frank Sinatra, Miles Davis is my best friend now

Thank you for the ask, this one was really fun! I hope you enjoy the playlist!

[whiskeyswifty]

How different do you think the real Taylor swift is from the public persona?

i have no idea, and that's the point i was making is that you'll never know unless you're a friend of hers. and even then, depending on how famous a person is and when you became friends with them, there are things you may or may not get to be privy to. people at extreme levels of fame practice airtight privacy to the best of their ability to maintain their own sanity and to protect themselves and their loved ones. celebrities are unknowable, and in order to protect your sanity, it's a fools errand to think you do know them. not because they're tricking you, or are evil overlords trying to control you. celebrities are unknowable because you don't know them. that's all. you watch performances, on social media and in articles and music videos. and you might say, well gee, how can someone LIE all the time, and i must insist again that they're not lying. they're just performing. i might ask you how much of your instagram are photos of you only in curated moments you shared to create a persona that is not the full, or even real, you. even if it's done subconsciously, you do it, i do it, we all do it. you don't post photos of yourself when you wake up, when you're having a fight, when you fail at something, or when you're being punished or anything that would make yourself look bad. why would you? so in that respect, imagine someone thinking they deeply knew you and all about your life from just your instagram? that would sound CRAZY right? how could they when you know you only post a fraction of stuff, and some of it is you posing or intentionally cutting things out of frame? you never outright lied, not exactly, but you curated and framed things, sometimes literally, to project a persona that is varying degrees of your true self. and you might say "well yeah duh, instagram is just a curated version of a person. we know that now" well thats true of celebrities too. in every public display of self. it's perfectly normal behavior to want to present only the best version of yourself to the world, or at least a person that the world will like or will get the reaction you are hoping to get. everyday people do it every day, including celebrities, who just do it on a larger scale.

[autismcheese]

Hey I have prompt for you. I have lots of thoughts on TSP so here you go along with a prompt.

Stanley finds where the narrator is and kicks him out of his office. Narrator is now trapped in a mortal body, he very much doesn't like it. He loses control over the office. Because he kicked the narrator out of his office, the power latched on to Stanley. Stanley wants payback and makes the narrator do the game, over and over again.

Narrator tries to convince Stanley to go back to the way things were but Stanley is scared he will be forced to do all the worst endings again, to suffer under the monotonous endings for eternity. He doesn't give back the power.

Stanley gradually loses his corporeality and begins to become somewhat of an eldritch being. Stanley speaks to the narrator directly in his head, like a constant whispering, or as direct knowledge of what Stanley is saying (could also be words projected onto the buildings walls.)

The office becomes blanker, less textured, the computers don't work anymore and many objects become just box shapes. Stanley isn't as skilled of a storyteller and the story (and the office by default) begins to degrade because of it. Eventually Stanley can't fix it, he becomes even quieter in the narrators head, the office is dark and made of simple shapes.

The narrator knows he needs to find Stanley and fix the game. He can't imagine an eternity without Stanley.

Eventually he finds Stanley, stumbling through the dark until he finds him, barely clinging to his form and takes back the power of the office and the role of narrator, gently untwining Stanley and Office from one another. He holds Stanley very carefully, as only someone who loves that person can. He can't fully untwine them, so instead intertwines himself into the mix.

Stanley comes alive again and they play the game again, but together, and create new happier endings.Their minds are more intertwined and so they both know how much they care about one another and there is no hiding from their feelings anymore. They are very sappy and adorable and sometimes vicious but they always care about eachother.

More info: The Office is its own entity, it trapped the narrator first and gave him power over it in exchange for a new story. The narrator's story however, needed a protagonist, but the office can't create new personalities or people. So the Office yoinked Stanley out of whatever his life was and gave him to the Narrator.Anyone trapped by the office is bound by it, the office had previously trapped others but it hides them away after their story completely ends and folds them into whatever story the new narrator comes up with. The curator is an example of this, so is mariella and a few others

I would write this but I never have time so I hope this gives you some amount of happiness

This prompt is so genuinely chilling to read, and should I find the motivation, I will write it the best I can to do it justice! It’s CRAZY good.

[goongiveusnothing]

Hi 👋🏽 I’m this anon and I was just frustrated and decided to share it since this image that’s been curated around him and how he’s oh so respectful of women and their wishes when it isn’t true at all. But you can choose to believe it or not idc and neither does my friend lol she’s happy and in a relationship with someone who actually loves and cares for her and respects her decisions and doesn’t pressure her or try to manipulate her to make certain decisions :) x

well good for her.

i just think it's good to inherently never really accept any anon thing online! we know how the harrie fandom is full of fake insiders who claim all types of things. they also like to troll.

but i can find the story believable because i have heard from friends who've slept with celebs about how they've been treated. often the men insist on not wearing condoms and just take it for granted the girl is on birth control, which i just find crazy. imagine all the STDs they could all be getting too.

[matrixbunni]

Divine Timing.

Are you ever perplexed by how things always seem to work out? Sometimes you just feel SO hopeless, where there is no way out, and everything just seems extremely fucked. And you're just thinking - how could this ever be fixed?

There's been many instances in my life where this has been the case. But for some reason things always find a way - and I don't know if its some divine being, or the universe, or some gracious third variable at play, but I am so grateful. Sometimes things don't make sense to me, in the moment or for awhile, but then it does.

Losing certain people in my life eventually led me to better appreciate the new people in my life in a different light. It made me realize that there are better, that I could be treated better, that I could give more of myself and not be taken advantage of. I've met people that actually have no ulterior motives - can you believe it - and just love me for the sake of loving me. Experiencing certain heartbreaks, romantic, platonic, familial, has allowed me to better communicate my feelings and solidify my inner circle.

I have women in my life that genuinely want me to succeed. I have women in my life that see my efforts, don't view me as competition, and truly see me for me. Not just as the party friend, not as a random micro influencer, just me. Where were able to have deep talks about life, our values, our struggles, and everything in between without any judgment.

I have men in my life that truly inspire me to be a better person. That challenge me to do things I've either fallen out of love with, like writing and reading, and to try new things like yoga, or running. That help support me when I need it whether that be physically, driving me around, or emotionally, giving me a fresh logical perspective. Men that can truly feel and talk about their emotions, men that encourage ME to be less uptight & communicate more - could you imagine LMAO.

I have a sister who makes me feel seen for my efforts, and parents that support me physically in reaching my dreams. Most importantly, parents that are recently putting in effort to communicating effectively and healthily. That are trying to do better, trying to right their wrongs.

Crazy how the ripple effect works. I lose my job from Fred, I fall into despair, because obviously working for QE Home is not going to be fulfilling to me in the long run. I know I have way more potential than that. And this pitfall has then redirected me to applying, which then leads me to securing this new job, that pays so much higher, and with a title much more aligned with me. If it weren't for the situation with Fred, I would've never gotten here.

If it were never for the fallout with my family, I would've never been this strong. And appreciate it when they are showing support.

If it were never for the god awful friendships I experienced, I would struggle to see the merit and gravity of the beautiful friendships I have in my life.

If it were never for the toxic relationships (and my own place in being toxic), I would never be able to see the extent of my own personal growth, as well as the ability to curate healthy relationships now.

If it were not for the feelings of rejection and hopelessness at my old jobs, (or unemployment), it wouldn't have redirected me to the place where I want to be.

If it were not for all these, I would've found it difficult to do what I want to do, be the person I want to be, and trust myself and others.

So today I just wanted to express my gratitude and appreciation to everyone and the universe. The truth is, nothing has tangibly changed yet - my salary is still the same, I haven't started my job. The same people are in my lives, but yet, my perspective has changed and I think I should allow myself to be happy, and allow myself to be proud of myself.

Once I let that for myself, I can begin to support and give back to the amazing people in my life that have made me this way.

07/10/2024

[j0kers-light]

okayy, so, how would Joker react if reader was obsessed with history?? Like, really obsessed, she knows how long Napoleon's d_ck was, has been to france over a hundred times just to see Marie Antoinette's bedroom, has watched and read every historial movie/book possible and is yapping all the time about weird history facts??

One and half inches.

So....... basically you want me to describe myself? Aight. Let's get into it! I sincerely hope you enjoy love🖤✨

Joker knows you're a history buff. You're always sounding off random facts during normal conversations that he's used to it by now.

If he says something inaccurate, rest assured, you take a deep breath and hit him with the "well, actually..." A normal correction rant lasts about 5-30 minutes or 1-2 hours if he's completely wrong.

He doesn’t have a clue about what you’re saying majority of the time but he’s a supportive lover so he’ll listen more so to the sound of your voice rather than what you’re saying.

That being said, Joker uses your extensive knowledge of things to his advantage. If he brings you to a meeting, he purposefully says something incorrect to get a reaction out of you and you fall for it every single time. For example…

“Historically, The Battle of Agincourt was an astonishing victory for the English despite the reported 25,000 French forces that showed up. It was won not by luck.. but military tactics like using the terrain and basic human instincts. Imagine stepping over your fallen comrades wearing armor weighing 60 pounds through thick mud and..."

Annnnnnnnd you begin an impromptu history lesson. This is gonna take a while.

All Joker said was, 'get your feet out of the mud and focus.' How you connected his comment to facts from a 14th century battle, Joker will never know. It’s a hidden talent of yours.

Now you're educating his goons about the historical importance of the English longbow and quoting excerpts directly from Shakespeare's play Henry V. The crazy part, they're actually listening!

His bunny is weird. That's all he can say. He doesn't bat an eyelash when you beg him to go on another trip overseas.

There's a new exhibit at the Palace of Versailles and you have to see Marie Antoinette's bedchambers again! Like it changed since last year.... 🙄

He takes you anyway and you know more than the tour guide that tourists are following you around the vast estate learning odd facts and trivia.

You have too much information stored in that silly little head of yours. Can someone really be that smart?

You know about every little thing to the point that it should be annoying, but Joker loves watching you nerd out over documentaries, books, and etc. You can easily be a historian or curator.

Joker does not dare bother you when a new research article or accredited documentary drops because you are laser focused, mouthing the new knowledge under your breath as it gets absorbed in.

Do you really need to know that much about the past? Yes, he doesn't understands how history repeats itself but come on! Some of this stuff is useless knowledge....

Your interests span from the Byzantine empire to modern day culture ranging from crucial facts to funny tidbits.

Joker is not exaggerating to the boys when he says, "Y/n. Knows. Everything."

"Alright lightening round. I'll stop if you're incorrect. You ready Y/n?"

You nod at Morgana and close your eyes to concentrate. In the background, Joker and his loyal three were scheming a new mission at your dining room table. You and Morgana are forced to entertain yourselves until they finish.

They stopped discussing plans the second Morgana started asking random questions.

"Modern day Persia is located where?"

"Iran!"

"When did construction on the Tower of Pisa begin?

"Uh... it took 199 years.. ooh! August 9th, 1179!"

"China's first emperor." Morgana asked. You opened your mouth to answer, but paused.

"Male or female?" You asked.

She smirked. Okay.. you understood the assignment.

"First male emperor, Qin Shi Huang who invented the title emperor and created the Qin dynasty. The first any ONLY female emperor, is my girl Wu Zetian! A true, started from the bottom now we here! Her epitaph remains left blank."

Morgana resumed her quick fire questions ranging from the ancient and modern world with you answering all correctly and adding a cool side fact.

It was rather impressive.. until Joker decided to have a little fun. "Since ya know soooo much Bunny. Do ya know Batman's identity?"

You were halfway answering the process of explaining Venetian architecture, when you heard Joker’s comment.

The room went quite waiting for your answer. Frost and Joker lock eyes but they quickly dart over to you when you finally respond.

“I don’t know everything J. Batman’s identity is a well guarded secret however he and I are on speaking terms. I can ask him whenever we ever bump into each other again. Not like I’ll get an answer, but it’s worth a shot.”

You nod to yourself and without missing a beat, you resume explaining to Morgana how the floating city of Venice was created one wooden pile at a time.

Meanwhile Joker is fuming at the table. “Whaddya mean bump into him again?!” Why does this sound like a common occurrence?

[since777]

Hi Wifey,

I'm at the gate waiting to board and go back to the cold haha

The last two weeks went by too fast and perfectly slow at the same time. I loved every moment with you. From the beach to the mountains to the city, you curated a great trip :D But mostly, I loved small moments with you, like being the same space as you, listening to "Ella" live, being your passenger and totally trusting you, laying with our legs intertwined, folded into each other, looking into your 3d eyes as you smile widely at me, the back of your neck when you're doing the dishes, how we stick to each other in the heat, the taste of your salty sweat, the way your face softens when you look at me. It's so crazy because I hate sticking to people in the heat, but I love it with you.

Didn't I tell you it would feel like a dream? I was right per usual. 😏

And you really are better than I imagined. I love every single thing about you. I'm obsessed with you. Even when you were in front of me I thought to myself "how could I be so lucky?"

You make all things possible.

I will be better. We will go back to our "normal" lives and keep getting better so that we can be together all the time.

I love you, I appreciate you, and I'm always so so so grateful for you my beautiful inside and out wifey !

Occasionally. 🤣

[hannahsliteraryhaven]

The Book That Wouldn't Burn

by Mark Lawrence ★★★★★

OMG! The twists! Yes, there's more than one twist!! 😱😱😱

I will preface this review with the fact that I am not a big fantasy reader, so I don't have much of a mental catalogue of books to compare this too. But wow, I devoured this book! It's official - Lawrence has converted me into a fantasy reader and I hope to read the rest of this series!

There are so many threads interwoven in the story that it's hard to dissect them for this review. My mind is swamped with the world that Lawrence beautifully curates, the loveable characters and the mysteries of the library and Crath City. I love how seemingly two separate perspectives are much more deeply interwoven than you could ever have imagined, and how it gradually unravels and everything slots into place. And the first twist! There were the subtlest of hints, yet I didn't see it coming AT ALL! I didn't see the second twist coming either… so many times I stopped and glared at the book like, this can't be happening (in a good way)?!

I'll be honest though, the first few chapters didn't catch my attention. I wasn't too fond of Livira's character. But when we move into Evar's perspective where he's trapped in the library, my attention was captured. Livira does some crazy things at times, but as she grows into a woman, I enjoyed her character as well as Evar's, and the love they have for each other is so sweet. I've seen other readers saying they loved and preferred Livira over Evar, so each to their own.

The story moved at a steady pace, with something happening all the time! Something was always happening, being discovered or things were clicking into place, so my attention stayed with the book throughout. It's not often that I read a book that has me pining to continue to read it, especially such a big one!

I dislike books that spend far too long on description, but I didn't find that an issue at all in this book. Another reviewer said they felt there was a little too much description, but I guess because I was so hungry for more information about the world, I didn't see an issue. I actually really enjoyed how Lawrence writes and I'm intrigued by his other series. I could envisage everything pretty clearly in my mind's eye, though I couldn't comprehend the size of the library of course! Things get a little complex near the end and at occasional points, but I was still able to follow the heart of the story and really enjoy it. I was going to rate it about 4.5 or 4.75 out of 5, but I couldn't accept the very low star ratings and want more people to find and love this series, mwhahahaa!

Lawrence has said that this book is almost a love letter to books and I totally see that. If you love books about books, then this is one for you. If you love books about time travel and robots then this is the book for you. This is also definitely a book that you can reread, if that's your thing.

[themindelectricdemo4]

i think to myself lke. back lke 2 year ago, im like...my friendship with my friends was so good, what happened?

really, i let myself go. i got a lot of disappointment in my regular life (couldnt get disability, more illnesses, treatment failing, family dying) i found that gong to college has helped me so much. because its like...setting a life for myself. getting a routine. having something to wake up for.

when all i wanted to wake up was for my friends, they were the brunt of everything, especially my moodiness that was becoming more & more unstable. i keep wanting to apologize but i hope i can form better wording in my head that articulates what i want to say the most (firstly that it doesnt justify my actions, and secondly, that im not crawling back to rekindle) im kind of stuck with overthnking it, so honestly.......it could be a world where i never directly apologize because i fear what my words sound like

i havent changed in that aspect in that i miss the connotation of my words often...maybe i could show it to my partner for proof reading, but i wouldnt want to involve a lot of people or anything ive accepted this is my human flaw & i continue to try & wrap my head around implications but it doesnt work. i do feel dumb ..oh well what can i do. i try to ask people to ask for clarification if they think something i said was weird (because if my intentions were mean ...i would want to make sure you knew for sure ...LOL.) but if they dont.. dont know what to do. but ive find in college, my friends ask me, they respect that, they make me feel like a human being & not some dumb (insert a barrage of slurs i could call myselfhere). self inflicted words..because i wish i could just learn social shit like a normal person & i feel dumb for not being able to mask this, or be able to study it enough to even pretend like i understand

im happy with the way my life is going now... i went to college, met my partner irl, i havent thought about genuinely kmsing myself in a good while now, like i couldnt go a month or two without planning it in my head, but im...actually doing good? its crazy...even my psych said she was so proud of me today saying she couldve never imagined me how i am today just because of how bad i was. i dont take that as a negative btw cuz thats me past tense. im proud of it.!!! really like, after whatever the fuck happened in august '23 i was like, ok. no more of this shit.

& it worked? i got all As, im in college. holy shit. the several times i would blow up on my friendsin the past into HUGE fights? the most heated i got was exactly one time where i snapped after a long day of being spoken over (by this person that i didnt particularly want to hang out with, as agreed upon with my friend because even that person agreed we didnt have a lot in common) & that...was it??? like im shocked. all my rage . gone . whar. .. & my friends are like.......they ask me what im doing/feeling based on things i do cuz they think im mad (the rbf & monotone voice) & im like oh!! oh my gosh no, im good! im sorry for worrying u & they were like oh! dw just checking. cuz i curated the baddest bitches of autistics who just get it fr . me & my current bestie we just ask each other the most blunt questions to get clarity on situations & i love that 4 us ... hes supa nice. love all my fends . but wow idk im proud of myself & this turned into a ramble where im positive cuz i was acually gettng mad at myself sadge but yea. i do wanna apologize but im afraid of being misconstrued & my paranoia over this manifests into probably never doing it. i got lving with my mother probably to blame fo r that (dont get me started on the shit she pulled over winter break that everyone in my family agrees she is ridiculous for with physical proof ok im reeling

[sizzlingpatrolfox]

it's funny how so many jikookers have always said jungkook is 100% gay and jimin is more likely to be bi. but most of them had no problem with jimin using female pronouns in like crazy and having female backup dancers all over him, yet they're now freaking out at the possibility of jk having a female love interest in his mv. why would they care so much if jk is supposedly so disinterested in women? it just shows that their claim that jk is gay is a cope, deep down they all think he's straight (not saying he couldn't be bi though, i'm just talking about how jkkers perceive him)

To be fair, I haven't really seen jikookers freaking out about Jungkook and the woman. It's not like I've been checking for their reactions, but I haven't come across anything like that yet.

If they are, I think it's because of what you said... they already believed in the possibility of Jimin being bi. So Jimin being held by men and women wasn't much of a shock lol. It probably also has to do with the fact that like crazy lyrics Jimin wrote himself, he didn't really write the word "she". Also, the fact that everyone seems to acknowledge like crazy as a sad song. There's no clear romantic interest, and no explicit scenes between Jimin and a woman either. It's like everything gets mixed up.

In all honesty, Jungkook has curated his image in a spectacular way. He used to be really touchy with female staff but when BTS blew up, he stopped and the whole "Jungkook is afraid of girls" thing started. The only reason people think he's gay it's because he allegedly shows no interest in girls, but he obviously does that on purpose. He has a normal relationship with girls, just as every other member.

But well, the fandom in general is very dumb too. They can only imagine the members in extremes. To many, some are gay because they don't interact with women, and the ones who interact with women are straight. That's not real life.

[i-am-literally-deranged]

Actually you know what I WILL criticize you on the hottest dating sim character.

Shuu Iwamine is objectively more attractive than Yuuya, and here is a neat bulleted list of why I think so:

He evil. Everyone likes someone evil and a little bit irreparably damaged.

Long hair,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, tied up in a cute little bow

Those EYES. We've all seen the "Unique!! White blue-eyed boy!" but I've seen people drool over those deep purple eyes

Tired all the time. Relatable

Constantly drawn covered in blood. People go crazy over that

He berates the player but occasionally gives them validation, which is enough to make most people coming back for more (as ill-advised as that may be)

Oh I love a good debate!!!! :D

• I actually think that irreparably damaged but still NOT evil is the hottest variety of character! It's easy to be traumatized and evil, but it takes some real SUBSTANCE to be more than that. Yuuya has some real dimension to him! He's incredibly selfless! He murdered a baby. He's incredibly loyal! He mutilated one of his best friends' body and covered up her murder. He's such a truly good person! How many students died while he was on the job? But Shuu is just plain evil. Sure there is dimension to him, but I don't find it COMPELLING. I can't get into Shuu's head and see myself making the same decisions he did. I can't justify or rationalize any of the things he did. That's a lot less hot to me than someone like Hitori or Yuuya who come in all these lovely shades of gray. Their bad deeds are so UNDERSTANDABLE, so genuine. They're more understandable, more sympathetic, and so it's easy to feel closer to them. I can't imagine feeling close to Shuu. The things he does are too evil, and don't make as much sense. When Yuuya does something awful it makes SENSE. It feels like an almost inevitable tragedy, there's no other way it could have gone, there was no right answer and he took the best way out he knew how. THAT'S SOME HOT TRAGEDY RIGHT THERE, REAL SHAKESPEAREAN SHIT!! THE GOOD STUFF!! When Shuu commits atrocities it's like. Ah, it's Tuesday. He just does it because it's What He Does. He's evil, and a terrible decision maker, and that's why he does what he does. And honestly, as much as I love the shades of gray, and the appeal of villainous characters is undeniable, I'm a real sucker for the good guys. I've never been one to fall into the tumblr sexyman trend of loving the villains. I love heroes and anti-heros! Good people in bad situations, just doing their best in a world without any right answers. Nothing makes me UwU💕 more than that.

• okay you got me there. Shuu's hair is fantastic. I love it. And his bow is amazing you're so right. ALTHOUGH credit where credit is due, Yuuya's little hair clips! They're so cute.

• Okay but HAVE YOU SEEN YUUYA'S SMILE??? It's so charming!!!!!! You can just FEEL the warmth in it. It's playful, it's easygoing, it's charming, it's mysterious. And as we all know!!! Mystery IS the most powerful of aphrodisiacs after all! Shuu has those purple eyes, but his smile says serial killer, and it's not lying. Yuuya's smile strikes my heart still! Also, Shuu's purple colour scheme is physically part of him, he didn't make that cool style decision himself. But Yuuya having all orange matching accessories?? That's so cute!! He planned that, made a conscious decision to colour code himself in orange. It makes me think that maybe it's his favourite colour. Shuu was handed the purple aesthetic life, but Yuuya chose and intentionally curated an orange aesthetic for himself, and I think that's wonderful.

• Okay but have you considered that Yuuya is also frequently covered in blood, and it's almost always his own blood? Being drenched in your own blood is SO much better than being drenched in somebody else's. It's more sanitary, and it gives poor little meow meow points. Yuuya covered in his own blood is infinitely hotter than Shuu covered in anonymous blood from somewhere unknown. What can you do with a Shuu covered in blood? Where do you GO from there? But a Yuuya covered in blood, that's the start of a hurt/comfort fanfic in the making! You can like, take him home and patch him up. There's places to go with that, there's a plotline in the making. Ergo, Yuuya's blood is hotter than Shuu's.

• I am immune to this effect on account of not being into degradation. Also, if Shuu's subtle praise is worth coming back for, what about Yuuya's flirtations? They're genuine compliments AND kind of a funny joke at the same time. That's the best of both worlds. You can joke with him about it, AND feel good about all the nice things he said about you. They're fun and cute, and some of the nice things he says are pretty genuinely sweet.

Some further points,

•With Yuuya you can get into these action packed near death experiences. Nothing more attractive than that, a "You and me against the world" partnership in a world that wants you dead. That's the best kind of bonding experience there is, and so logically, doing super spy stuff with Yuuya makes for an objectively fantastic date. Bonding through danger! A partnership where you trust eachother with your lives, literally! You can't get that kind of thing with Shuu, because Shuu IS the danger.

•ALSO Yuuya would Treat Me Right, and I know this with absolute confidence. Shuu is limited in his potential hotness by the fact that you can never really get close to him without getting murdered. But Yuuya? Yuuya cares. Yuuya would literally die for you. Yuuya is loyal, and kind, and just a damn good guy all around. He cares so much! He's such a good friend. Just look at the way he interacts with Sakuya. Or better, how he interacts with Ryouta, who he has no real connection with or obligation to, but still treats with so much kindness even though Ryouta is so hard on him. You gotta appreciate how much Would Treat Me Right energy Yuuya brings to the table

• I have terminal I Can Fix Him disease, and Yuuya's abysmally low self esteem makes me foam at the mouth. Every time something horrible happens to him I go absolutely feral, and bad things happen to Yuuya a lot. The more a character suffers the hotter they are. This is an objective fact.

[xcrystalzero]

all the things i believed

pairing: xiao x reader

summary: you've only seen the boy who lives in the apartment one over from yours a few times, but you knew the look of someone who wanted to seem intimidating when you saw one. so, why was his music taste so adorable?

alternatively, xiao thinks that the apartment walls are a lot thicker than they actually are and accidentally exposes the fact that he's not nearly as angsty as he wants everyone to believe.

note: soft xiao makes me way too happy. also, here is xiao's playlist! i recommend listening while you read :) if you guys like it, i'll make playlists for my fics more often!

"I'll miss you!" Your roommate had her arms wound tightly around your torso and it didn't seem like she planned on letting go any time soon. She was also squeezing just a tad too hard and it was starting to hurt.

Gingerly, you patted her on the shoulder, subtly attempting to pry her off of you with your other hand. "I'll miss you too... But remember, it's only two weeks and then you're back!"

That only served to make her pout even more as she finally pulled away "Two weeks is so long though! How am I going to survive without you and your brownies?"

"Hah, so you're really only worried about not having brownies huh?"

"You know that's not what I meant!" she whined, causing you to giggle slightly. Honestly though, there was no way anyone watching could possibly think that she would only be gone for two weeks. Your roommate had decided that she needed three full suitcases and the world's largest carry-on purse for her little trip, and you were honestly a little worried about it.

"Ahem..." Your bonding moment was promptly interrupted by a soft but very present voice directly behind you. Whirling around, you came face to face with a vaguely familiar figure.

It was the golden eyes that caught your attention first. Even in the strange fluorescent light of the hallway, they almost seemed to have a light of their own, a hypnotizing sort of gleam that you couldn't bring yourself to look away from. Of course, the rest of him was no less than stunning either. Dressed head to toe in black with his angular features and lean build, he was striking.

His eyes widened slightly as you turned towards him though they settled fairly quickly back into what you could only assume was his trademark glare.

"Just... trying to get through." His voice was gruff, but much softer than you had anticipated. Perhaps even gentle?

Oh yeah, that was how you knew him! Your schedules must have been somewhat similar since you were sure you passed him at least a few times a week. You had never talked but you were pretty sure you had seen him going into the unit one over from yours quite a few times.

So this was your neighbor huh? He was cute, if a little intimidating.

"Oh sorry!" your roommate chimed in. "We were just leaving, we'll get out of your way!" She began to scoot her bags to the side and you quickly joined in, wheeling one of the suitcases to the side, though you couldn't seem to keep your eyes off of the guy. Every time you looked away, it was as though your gaze was drawn back towards him by some unnatural force.

It helped that he seemed just as awkward with the whole thing as you did, alternating glancing between the you and your roommate, the floor, and his phone. As soon as there was enough space for him to squeeze by, he did, mumbling a quick thanks as he made his way down the hall, unlocking his door and disappearing into his apartment in what felt like a second.

After a moment of silence, your roommate piped up again. "He's cute!"

"He can probably still hear you!" you whacked her across the shoulder, causing her to pout in your direction again, though the teasing look never left her eyes.

"He's kind of your type too isn't he?" she all-but waggled her eyebrows in your direction to which you rolled your eyes.

"Aren't you already late for your flight"

"Oh shit!"

~~~

The apartment felt so strange when you were alone. Usually around this time of night, your roommate would have come banging on your door to join her for her late night rom-com marathon or to help her chose an outfit or the party she was going to. Tonight however, everything was quiet.

With a sigh, you slumped over onto your bed, scrolling aimlessly through your phone in hopes of finding some sort of entertainment.

That was when you heard it. The soft sound of an instrumental through the wall, slowly building in volume as you assumed whoever lived in that room turned up the volume.

"40 days and 40 nights... I waited for a girl like you to come and save my life..."

Aww cute, love songs! Had you been busy or doing literally anything else, you might have been annoyed, or at least a little worried about exactly how loud they had to be playing their music for you to be able to hear it. As things stood though, it was a welcome distraction.

"You were out of my league, all the things I believed, you were just the right kind yeah you were more than just a dream..."

Oh yeah, you knew this song too! There was a sort of second timbre to the sound and you wondered if the person playing the music was singing along as well.

Wait, who was playing that music. Judging by the sound, it was likely the unit one to your left where their wall joined with yours. The unit one to your left...

Multi-colored hair and golden eyes... The cute guy? Pulling yourself immediately up into a sitting position, you pressed yourself to the wall before immediately realizing how crazy you were acting.

He was just playing music, that wasn't anything weird.

"Romeo take me, somewhere we can be alone..."

Taylor Swift. He was playing Taylor Swift. At that, you started laughing. Wow, appearances really could be deceiving huh? You sighed as you leaned with your back against the wall, letting the vibrations from the music soak into your very being.

You were sure that you'd heard music coming from that unit before but he wasn't usually loud at all. Maybe something was different today? Maybe you'd ask him when you next saw him. And maybe, he'd actually want to talk to you when you did.

Or maybe not.

So for now, you let your head rest against the wall, letting the music and soft singing lull you into relaxation.

~~~

That was it, you despised public transportation. All you wanted was to get out of your apartment for one day and take your work to a nearby cafe. So of course, when you ran outside to catch the bus that came once every hour, the bus driver looked you straight in the eye as he closed the door right in front of you and drove off. And then for good measure, it started raining.

You sighed, burying your face in the backpack on your lap. If the bus app was right, which it rarely was, there was another bus you could take arriving in the next few minutes, so maybe this wouldn't be as awful as you thought.

The sound of footsteps entering the little bus stop booth got your mind off of your moping as you raised your head just enough to peer over at who it was that had just joined you.

Oh. Standing there, hood pulled up over his multi-toned hair and seemingly permanent scowl fixed on his lips, was your hot neighbor. Your hot neighbor with very interesting music taste if last night told you anything.

Since nothing could go right for you, the moment that you looked at him, he looked at you, meaning the two of you got to share a few agonizing seconds of awkward eye contact before he pointedly turned away with a soft "tsk". That being said, you were sure that you weren't imagining the slight tinge of shock you had seen in his gaze for a moment.

"You've got good timing, there's one coming in like 5 minutes." You had no idea how you had managed to get the words out without stuttering or blushing the moment he turned back to look at you.

"That's good..." Yup, that was an expected response, and yet, you really just wanted him to keep talking. So this was the end of your story with the gorgeous emo boy next door. Relegated to exchanging conversation about public transportation and nothing more. It was really the wasted potential here that was killing you. So many cute interactions that would just never happen. Ah if only the bus would come so that you wouldn't have to wallow in your despair any longer.

"I... thought you were leaving yesterday?"

Oh? You whirled around way too quickly to face the man, causing his eyes to widen as he shifted away instinctually.

"Oh, I was just helping my roommate move all of her stuff," you managed to get out, summoning what you hoped was a non-nervous smile to your lips.

"Those were all her bags?" he seemed horrified, enough so that you couldn't hold back your laughter.

"I said the same thing! She's kind of insane sometimes but I love her..." Well, it was no or never. "I'm [name] by the way!" You smiled and extended a hand out towards the boy.

He regarded you for a moment with a look you couldn't put into words. After what felt like an eternity however, he gently took your hand in his own, holding it for barely a moment before pulling back again. "Xiao."

Xiao. There was a strange sense of relief that came with this new knowledge. Know that you knew his name, was it couth to ask him what his favorite Taylor Swift song was? Probably not. But there was a chance that you might literally never be able to talk to him again... Meh, it was as you were thinking before right? Now or never.

"Hi Xiao. I liked your playlist last night by the way." The words came out more effortlessly than you had thought they would, carefree and teasing.

You were a little bit surprised though when you glanced back over at Xiao, only to find him eyes blown wide as a deep red spread quickly across his cheeks. "Y-You!"

"Honestly a pretty good curation! If a little unexpected..." You had no idea what it was about this guy but he really brought the snarky, teasing part of you out. Maybe it was the fact that while he usually looked cold and intimidating, blushing, embarrassed Xiao was strangely adorable.

"I thought you left!" Xiao blurted out. "I mean... There were so many bags... And your roommate said that you guys were leaving..."

You stared blankly at him for a moment before immediately dissolving into peals of laughter. Xiao had the gall to pretend to be offended for a moment before he looked away with a soft huff. "What..."

"You know, I kind of thought you were scary at first," you managed between giggles. "I guess not though!"

"Ugh, you're insufferable." Xiao rolled his eyes though you were sure that you saw the slightest hint of a smile as he did. "Why were you listening through the walls anyway?"

"Xiao, it was literally so loud."

"It wasn't that bad!"

"And I think I heard some singing too! Say, you in a band? Do you guys usually just write love songs?"

"I was not singing!"

There was a strange warmth in your chest as the two of you went back and forth. So things could go right for you after all?

~~~

Sadly, you and Xiao hadn't been going the same way, so when his bus came - before yours you might add - the two of you had parted ways. The sun had been going down when you made your way back home, satisfied with a productive day, though the memory of your conversation with Xiao was still taking up a lot more headspace than you would have liked.

So this is what it was like to simp for a guy? You weren't sure you liked it.

Setting down the takeout you had picked up on the counter, you crashed onto your living room couch with a low groan. Sleep would be nice right about now, but also, you had to eat and shower and clean...

"I wonder what Xiao's doing?" The thought appeared in your head suddenly and you almost smacked yourself right then and there. Why were you always thinking about him? You'd literally spoken to the guy once, and it wasn't anything special! Just some teasing and his little retorts... And his cute blush... And his little smile... And the way he pretended to be annoyed when he was clearly enjoying it... Wow, this was worse than you thought.

"CAN YOU FEEL MY HEART?"

You yelped, jumping up in your seat at the sudden noise, coming once again from the wall separating you and Xiao's units. You paused for a moment but before you could stop yourself, you were back up on your feet, making your way over and banging against the wall.

"You're not fooling anyone Xiao!" you yelled, not sure if he could even hear you. Apparently he could since the music stopped as quickly as it had started. There was a moment of silence as you pressed your ear to the wall, waiting for his next move. What you did not expect was to hear sound in the other direction. A knock on your door.

Confused, you made your way over, unlocking the door and pulling it open to reveal, Xiao? He was still wearing his giant black hoodie, though the glare was missing.

"Did you run out of sugar or something? Or fake angsty songs to play?" you questioned with a grin.

As expected, he let out a soft huff, turning his head away in fake exasperation. "You're a menace."

"So what I'm hearing is that you want me to send in a noise complaint!"

"You idiot... I'm just here to-" For whatever reason, he was blushing again.

"Here to?" you prompted, wondering if you should invite him in or offer him water or something. He was tugging at the collar of his hoodie too...

"J-Just here to say that if you're going to sit there listening through the walls, you might as well just come over..."

Did you hear that right? You stared at him for a moment longer, blinking slowly. This was probably a dream right? You were so tired when you got home that you fell asleep and now you were dreaming.

"I mean, you don't have to if you don't want to..." Or maybe not.

"You know, normal people just invite people over without pretending to be edgy right?"

"Shut it, are you coming or not?"

"Yeah yeah I'm coming. Oh yeah, I got takeout, I'll bring it. It's from that new place down the street, Wangshu Inn. Have you ever had Almond Tofu before?"

"... you're unbelievable."

note: i want a hot neighbor like xiao... i did have a hot neighbor who i did hit on, but then i found out that he had a girlfriend so i stopped... but xiao would be better.