#i mean i do it a lot bc im short but | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

auto-lysis · 2 years

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i wanna look like a rat/mouse

#prompted by my friend saying i was 'skrunkly but hot but pretty but oh so fucking cute'#and ppl saying i look pretty when i look up with my eyes? so specific #i mean i do it a lot bc im short but #christ #and i got the fluffy rat boy hair #pls shawty pls just make me a rat #i EVEV HABE THE BIG STUPID EYES WITH THE BIG STUPID CIRCLE GLASSES #im vv pasionate abt this #I EVEN LIKE CHEESE.#im just a rat mouse in a humans boddy #i wana be handled like a rat #all the attention 🥰#needing attention or they just die #<- me fr #i just nneed to be HANDLED #im.just a #poor little ran man #rat*

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cottageivy · 1 year

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ava, end of september, first semester of college

#ts4 #ts4 edit #ts4edit #myedits*#ava*#wanted to give ava a new haircut and then i ofc added meaning to it aksdsad #basically. last summer before college and last month of highschool were very very different to how they pictured #so this is after theyve had time to try and settle into that big change (not college they do be struggling lmao)#so theyre a bit out of their comfort zone with some clothes and trying new things #she spent the summer with carter on the ranch and took some inspo while still being them yknow #the denim top one im like struggling to see on ava #but she 'stole' it from carter bc she really liked it (which i do feel ava would like it) but doesnt know how to quite style it in their st #-le #tbf a lot of her wardrobe is sweaters and hoodies with shorts in september but this this is the broader variety #idk im a bit nervous on this one bc i tried to show a change while still retaining their style #again the denim vest is a mystery on how to style for them for both me and ava #but i tried bc ava stole it out of carters closet bc it was cool #anyways...

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gorespawn · 4 months

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also while we're here i would like to share the two iterations of tumblr user gorespawn that have existed since i abandoned this blog back in like early 2021. Who wants me

#i grew my hair out so i could twirl my hair while giggling about bald men #and also t.o.p of bigbang #and short men i see at the grocery store who honestly make me feel light-headed with raw and unbridled Want #but that's just a joke. i am. Lesbian #''no ur not'' I AM #anyway i used to be so ripped and hunky but now i am frail and sickly #what getting a job can do to a mf #thankfully i quit my job last week YIPPIIIEEEEEEE so now i will work towards becoming an absolute hunk again #wish me luck #ALSO #if anyone is obsessed with me and remembers all my lore i used to be transgender and i still am like lowkey on the down low #but in a new exciting way #anyway i used to be a gay man and then a stone butch dyke (as seen above) but now im practicing being a girl #it is very difficult but it is also fun. ive never been a girl before so it's a lot #anyway i bought two super cool sexy dresses yesterday for the first time ever in my life #sexy dresses meaning up to my neck and down to my feet and past my elbows. kind of like a wardrobe straight out of the handmaid's tale #from (to quote my friend) ''*The* old lady store'' thanks man. well i think theyre pretty and its v exciting bc ive never been a girl befor #anyway #who wants me #i still use the name emil online btw and i honestly always will i think it's just so me and also i do still answer to he/him dw #in a man way not in a he/him lesbian way #''he's LGBTQA+'' what. all at once?#yes.#i have mastered them all i have collected all the genders and all the sexualities and ive never been ''wrong''#it just keeps switching. which is fine. well im a girl now. in a detransitioning man way. who is insanely attracted to men #but you will have to tear this lesbian label out of my cold dead hands #''you can't call urself lesbian if u have sex w men'' well first of all fuck you and second of all i am celibate so you dont need to worry #''what the hell are you talking about'' nothing. now look how hot i am #im just joking around i hope that's fine w y'all

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puppyeared · 1 year

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ive made myself more wet and pathetic

#new icon because im SUFFERING. im in HELL #its so bad. i had to sign out of discord so now im both lonely and stressed #because i KNOW im still gonna get dstracted. i just did making this URGH #how good are brains at working around things. i once set a 7AM alarm on my phone with snooze cause i was so sure my brain would #be too lazy and keep snoozing instead of actually turning it off. but nay it either kept sleeping through the alarms and snoozing #or actually managed to turn off the alarm half awake that i barely remembered it and then waking up late #i actually have a track record of climbing out of bed and turning my alarm off without remembering. which is impressive bc i have a loftbed #the other thing is setting fake deadlines so make myself panic into doing things ahead of time. but unfortunately that doesnt work either #because if theres one thing my brain will put all its energy into remembering its self assurance. meaning i WILL be able to remember #the real deadline even if i try to trick myself. cant ask someone to give me a fake deadline either #the only things keeping me going rn is that i have deadlines due at least 1 day between each other and excitement being able to talk with #crow after break. but you can see how well thats going <- ignores long term rewards in favor of short term pleasure #BTW CROW IF YOURE READING THIS IM SO SORRY TURNING OFF MY DISCORD WITH BARELY ANY EXPLANATION #im a huge fucking dumbass and i had barely enough impulse control not to block everyone in my dms because i realized that would send a real #really bad msg. youre not distracting me im distracting myself and i promise youre not annoying me i just really like talking to you and #thats why im just barely stopping myself from signing in. I WANT TO TALK TO U LOTS BUT AT THE SAME TIME IM KICKING MYSELF FOR DOING IT #you can be a little mad at me btw cause i definitely could have done that better but i was all over the place abt how to do it without #making u think im ignoring you. IF THAT MAKES SENSE. SORRY #yapping #doodles #puppysona #edit but last week i tried to schedule and give myself work periods and break periods using my class schedule #and reminders on my phone to tell me when to start and stop. can you guess what happened

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flower-dagger-gay · 2 months

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just saw it

#spoilers in tags #I'm not a fan of marvel movies and only see them bc my mom always wants to go see them with me but I actually liked the dp movies and #x men movies so I actually liked this one a lot 💀#I loved the blade appearance (I literally said ''my boy!'')#(ngl snipes looks hotter now that im aware he evades his taxes)#CAN'T GET OVER HOW THE DAY WAS SAVED WITH THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIP #killer soundtrack (even if I am forced to listen to nsync in every short video now)#love the constant digging at fox and Disney- they're gonna make you do this until you're ✨90✨#also yeah no yeah I understand what y'all mean about the car scene-#deadpool and wolverine

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anotherpapercut · 11 months

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I know several people who like LOVE seasons 5-7 (11th doctors run) and think the storylines and moffats writing are brilliant and I don't get it!!! what am I missing??? why does literally every single episode have the exact same stakes: Rory/Amy/the doctor is dead. forever. so dead. but wait!!! what if they aren't!!! why do so many of the explanations for why they're not actually dead feel so rushed like they were added at the last minute!! why does every single queer character act kind of weird and awkward about being queer!! why does the doctor casually say that women are inferior when no one's around!!! what the fuck!! hello!!!

#why is rory continuously proving himself as the Only Man To Ever Exist only for the characters/narrative to continuously imply hes lesser #amy tries to kiss the doctor?? at her wedding??????#when amy is stuck for 36 years why is she like i forgot how much rory loved me?? GIRL HE WAITED 1000 YEARS FOR YOU???? WHAT????#he is CONSTANTLY the butt of the joke despite being unequivocally without a doubt the best character from this era #what the fuck was up with river being their kid #THE 50TH ANNIVERSARY???? WHAT?? THAT SHIT WAS WEIRD RIGHT???#does anyone else find it annoying that moffat changed the opening theme and the tardis and the sonic and the doctor ALLLL at once #and then retconned the entire storyline the early seasons are based off of??#WHY IS THE DOCTOR SO GODDAMN ANNOYING?? LIKE SO MUCH MORE ANNOYING THAN THE OTHERS #and fucking sexist!!! so sexist!!!#anyone remember the characters who were like 'were the short fat and tall skinny gay men why do we need names' LIKE HUH???????#gay people still have names steven 😭#i feel like im going insane bc i have no one else to talk to abt it until my partner catches up #but you guys still think these seasons kinda suck right? like coming off of martha and DONNA and her AMAZING storyline #these just kinda pale in comparison right??????#the last centurion is probably the last really good plot of that era imo. none of the other plots come close to having an ending that cool #like rivers story couldve been amazing and then it was just uh. kinda weird. a bit confusing IDK #i dont want to be a dick when talking to people and like shit on smth they love but i genuinely have a hard time #finding kind things to say abt a lot of this era #also and this might just be me but i do not like amy and clara v much 😭 theyre so fuckin mean and not even funny #why were martha donna and rose sooooo well written and they all have rich backstories. we know their fuckin families!!#literally its never even fully explained what the fuck happened to amys parents 😩😩 they just move on. the only friend of theirs #ever shown is fucking river??? as a kid??#am i the only one who found all thay confusing

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sensitivedead · 1 year

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i think 3 years of doom scrolling and consuming so much content has squashed my imagination a little

#its coming back but like #yknow how youll listen to music and just think but not actually think #youre like thinking of the song and riding it and the lyric and sometimes i get caught on one sound or one instrument and i get so lost in #thought #yeah i havent been able to do that the last like #seven months #i broke my brain fellas #i deleted tiktok and am NOT watching any short form esq videos like that #bc i actually am worried its like lol crushing my personality #i feel weird atm but a lot better. just been listening to music occasionally reading new articles on tumblr for sns and back to old routines #that are positive 🫶#shutup sensitive #LOL I WROTE PERSONALITY BUT i actually mean like dopamine receptors or smthn idk how true any of that is but im feeling something

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orbmanson7 · 8 months

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I managed to fully finish storyboarding one of the bigger animatics (in terms of how much work will be going into the finished version) for the logan angst flashcard project and I actually feel a tiny bit accomplished for once 🥲

Uhh, to celebrate, have this blurry shot of one of the frames!

#i decided this one would actually have even more mixed media by adding a live action timelapse segment #which means I'll have to figure out how to get access to after effects or figure out how to get REALLY creative with what i do have #oh well #im just glad this one is boarded fully bc thats been the hardest thing with all of these #the whole point with this project was that there were lots of animatics i wanted to make but i couldnt figure out how to fill the whole song #so instead these are just a bunch of snippets of songs like mostly the second verse and the chorus in like 90% of them haha #and i just do a short version animatic instead #but finally finishing boarding the Biggest one feels awesome :)#hope i dont completely fuck it up from here #its gonna look so good once its digital and colored in...#orbs thought bubbles

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pikkish · 3 days

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idk if this is a good prompt but put doomguy in myhouse.wad I think he would find it enriching

Right, so I've been mulling on this one for a little bit now, n I'm not opposed to writing something for you, I'm just not... entirely sure what to write? Because the thing is, myhouse.wad doesn't actually really have anything to do with Doom as a story. Sure, Doom is important in that it's the vessel through which the story is told and one of the connections between the narrator and his dead companion. But as far as Doom itself goes, and the story about a man who was too angry/stupid to die, fighting demons and saving earth, none of that is at all relevant to myhouse.wad and its story. For all intents and purposes, Doomguy isn't actually a character in myhouse.wad. So I'm not really sure how exactly to fit him in there.

#pikspeak #bc like. ok so if u say write dg as if he is actually the character in myhouse.wad #then the problem is that theres a pretty huge meta element to myhouse.wad and having some of the outside context- even just the context tha #its supposed to be the creator's dead friend's childhood home- is important. youre not MEANT to 'immerse' yourself in it or pretend you are #the protag. part of the impact comes from knowing youre just an observer and this is just a videogame on your computer.#writing dg as a character inside myhouse.wad would rob it of a lot of context and therefore impactfulness. hed just be walking around an #old house looking at things that have no meaning to him.#so ok then not dg as the protag of myhouse.wad but what about just like.. him in the funky liminal space of myhouse.wad? the non-euclidean #reality breaking shifting house of leaves place of myhouse.wad? i *could* do something like that if thats what youre looking for #but then considering this is the character whose reaction to finding himself in literal hell was to go 'hey??? this is stupid???? anyway im #gonna kill everything here' he probably wouldnt be too exceptionally ruffled by finding himself in a sorta funky reality breaking space.#hed probably still just go 'oh weird. funky. anyway back to killing demons.' and that would be it. which yeah i CAN write if its what u wan #it just. yknow. doesnt quite seem like the right tone? just kinda flat by comparison #i have considered doing things in the right tone before. since it is also canon that on his way back to hell dg has to run through the #burned out ruins of his own hometown. something similar to the visiting an old place thats been twisted by time and grief and coming to #terms with its loss or something to that effect #but. if im being honest i dont know that i have the writing skill to pull that off well much less as a short fic for a prompt response #uhhh anyway where was i going with this.#im happy to write something for you; possibly even something myhouse.wad related if you want!! im just not sure how to do that hdfbhdj...#anyway sorry for letting this one sit for so long without an answer. have another fic prompt where the fic is getting a little longer than #anticipated n combining that with rotating this to try n figure out what i could write for it...#guess time got away from me a little bit. sorry about that!

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kyuala · 11 months

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SOOOOOO hard to go through everyday life trying to ignore the never-ending feeling that im just irreparably fucked up and therefore should just give up on everything

#this aint exactly s******* but it aint exactly not s******* either #anyways it gets even harder when i have to live under the same roof as my brother who is so much better than me in every single conceivable #and imaginable way possible like #and i knowwww a LOT of it comes down to us having relatively similar yet wildly different lives despite being 1.5y apart and having the sam #family our entire lives like he has gone through NOTHING and i mean not a single societal issue ive had to face and endure my entire life #he's a man im a woman. he's white im black. he's straight im gay. he's skinny ive always been 'overweight'. he's always been the good #christian kid ive always had issues w faith and religion. he's never been mentally ill i was clinically depressed for nearly 8yrs of my lif #we both lost the same parent and im the only one who got pathological grief and a personality disorder out of it. he's had a great job for #the last 7yrs that now pays him 20k+ every month ive only had 3 odd jobs my entire life and 2 of those my MOTHER had to give me so i would #have SOMETHING and ive never made over 1.6k monthly n my last job was minimum wage only #he's had like 4 relationships and is nearly engaged im so traumatized + emotionally unavailable ive only ever been on 1 date my entire life #he has a good relationship w every family member we have i have Issues w like half the family. he's always been an active member of our #church i can barely listen to like 4 traditional hymns before i start losing my mind and spiraling. i think the only two ways we're pretty #much equal like socially is that we're both able bodied cis and christians but still the cis and christian thing is debatable for previousl #stated reasons so like. do yall see how much better he is doing than me in every little last area in life and how he's always gotten the #long straw when it comes to Not having to deal w certain obstacles in life. n i know its like yea idk what it actually is like to be him an #he could not be doing all that well first of all shut up. second of all if it was 1 or 2 things i'd get it but it's literally EVERYTHING #and i know bc of said things n our v different lives it's unfair to me to compare the two of us but then it begs the question: WHY #WHY did i have to go through these things. WHY do i have to deal w this. WHY did i get the short straw literally every goddamn time #WHY did i have to get THIS life like WHYYYYY why ME GOD. why have I had to put up w all this bullshit for 24 fucking years!!!!!!!!! im TIRE #and this is not me hating or resenting him i know it's not his fault and he is so good to me #but still. why was i left with these things? to live like this?#so yes i guess i do envy him a little bit. who wouldn't #mari.txt #personal #tw negative #dl #btw i do NOT mean some identities are better than others. i mean he is better and is doing better than me in life partially bc he's never #had to deal w certain social issues and obstacles that come w oppressed identities.

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cyrsed · 1 year

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#dead space #reblogging appreciated im genuinely very interested #i typically do 3 #sometimes 4 #plasma cutter + something short range + something long range #usually flame thrower/force gun + pulse rifle #i don't like the contact beam or the line gun that much bc they're too powerful lmao #altho the line gun's alt fire in the remake is soooo satisfying #but also i've watched a lot of people play the remake and i kinda feel terrible for the people who go in blind and #end up carrying every single weapon they pick up with them sdflskdj #that's a serious downside to the way they did it in the remake vs in the original where you had to buy it imo #like. i like the change for the remake a lot it's really cool to just find the weapons around the ship. that's sick as fuck #but i think it might confuse new players a bit and some people end up constantly out of ammo and having to switch guns #maybe that's the intended effect. i mean it's survival horror and all lol. but to me it looks absurdly frustrating #but maybe there's people who prefer to play that way? maybe im being judgemental lmao #but for the people playing blind i think they'd benefit from knowing that you can store weapons + ammo won't drop for stored weapons #polls

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formulafics · 10 months

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#disclaimer: this is just a vent don’t feel obligated to say anything 😼🙏🏻#tw. alcohol #trauma is real #which obviously i knew that but im feeling it rn and im just 🧍🏻‍♀️#long story short my mom used to drink a lot #and she chilled out recently but tonight has drank a lot more than usual and lord have mercy it’s messing with me bad folks #the amount of songs i can’t listen to be i go into flight or fight mode bc my mom used to blare them while drunk #which i mean i could have it a lot worse but yk #and like i can’t even be frustRted with my mom without feeling bad bc ik she deals with a lot but i can’t do anything to help #and the speed at which the night can go from good to bad bc of her drinking #not to mention i’m rewatching yellowstone and i still like it but it also brings back bad memories with my mom #bc we were watching yellowstone while she and i had some of our worse fights (due to her drinking)#anyways. if you’re reading shoutout to you i hope you don’t relate to this but if you do you’re not alone and ily #also who likes yellowstone #ryan please give me a chance (he’s a fictional cowboy who’s definitely too old for me)#(but i want him)#okay i’m done i hope you’re having a good night if you’ve read this far 🙏🏻

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undeniablereckoningart · 5 months

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HOW THE FUCK do you have so much motivation to do art. best i can do is a piece a day and then get burnt out after a week

-@grumbums-ooc

i dobt!!!

actually its the amino ask blog kid in me lol also got the mentality of "if i dont draw something for this blog today my whole social media presence will die in flames"

i also take unbelievably long breaks when i get demotivated (which sometimes leads to some artworks getting abandoned but yhats the prize i pay ig)

like one of the tjings ive been procrastinating on is zenqey's third lore post

#i also try to make it as easy as i can for me to make art #like some of the gifs i've made? online gif maker #also i got a brainrot for fawn and pascal so yknow #the autism does a lot #(i also use art as a coping mechanism sometimes so when im stressed i open ibispaint and just draw until i feel better)#also the opposite of taking breaks - sometimes i start drawing and won't do physically anything else until it's finished #plus (depends on person tbh) i watch youtube/listen to music that reminds me of the oc im drawing #if you get burnt out easily i recommend taking breaks whenever ur like “damn how tf” bc for me burnouts can mean really bad artblock #if you get artblock but u WANT to draw - i just draw and draw until i feel like im out of artblock #< (might not work?? my artblock times are usually short)

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rearranging-deck-chairs · 5 months

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trick to fun dialogue is just to make it a little hard to understand. maybe thats a cheap trick but i dont care

#or not even that hard necessarily just like it takes like 2 listens. it takes attention #and what 'harder' is is subjective depends on the type of dialogue you hear a lot and your vocabulary level #watching the nevers right #and im watching this scene and theres this character who exactly hits this spot for me #like 5........wait 5 years ago is not as far as i think it is.........7 years ago (ugh) i woudlnt have understood what she was saying #like i'd know all the words separately but iwouldnt have understood what she was saying at all #but rn im like oooh this is the exact balance between obscuring your meaning and substance #i think oftne in my writing i obscure more than there is substance #there usually /is/. /some/ substance #theres usually substance. just theres more complication than there is substance. here the balance is better #bc someone needs to say these words hfkghgj #the other day while reading scripts im making myself rewrite i was like 'i coudltn do this in a fic. iwouldnt get away with this'#lines that work in a script (bc they'll be acted) fall flat in fic bc we dont have the luxury (or limitation) of actors #but it really made me think abt like..what you need to do in a script for television vs in a fic based on that television you knwo what i #mean? different things you need to work for. WE need to work for that the characters sound like Them. that we can Hear them #tv gets that almost free. the words will be in the right voice in the right body that gets you like 60-70% of the way #less sometimes depending on the specificity of the character&circumstances i was mostly thinking abt the doctor who maybe has more leeway #and tv has the limitations of 1) needs to be sayable. but also 2) needs to be flatter i think #you cant put 5 meanings in every line bc theres plot that needs to keep going and sentences need to stay short #so you get a lot of character work for free i think but in return you need to rein yourself in in that way #anyway idk these observations were just based on like me rewriting the 14 specials and going 'this line fucking sucks in fic' fhgkjhgkjgh #not that it was a bad line! just. boring .meaningless. doesnt add. filler noise. i dont have TIME for that in fic. i lose people #idc if i lose readers i dont know abt that but i lose myself honestly very short attention span keep every word interesting #scripts are fluffy and repetitious. repetitive. but repetitious sounds funner #anyway its fun trying to match that tv need with my own lines that i add in #not too obscure. needs to be sayable. but with my own 'half the spices cabinet in my single cup of hot choccy' approach to writing #(and hot choccy)

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r1ghtwhereyouleftme · 8 months

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Me: I hate [insert thing here] discourse

Also me: *gets so annoyed when people are blatantly stupid and do things thay make zero sense therefore making me go along with discourse bc I can only handle so much stupidity*

#yes this is about queer discourse bc oh my god its painful #yes let people be themselves but also stop being stupid #sometimes things contradict each other and you can be both and that's fucking ok #its like the shit where ive seen people literally just too afraid of one label for whatever reason so they make up a middle label #god i sound shitty out of context #i mean like bi lesbian- you cant be bi and a lesbian that doesnt work #its ok to be bi its ok to be lesbian fuck its ok to be straight i just wish people would stop skirting around labels for dumb reasons #and this is all coming from someone who struggles like hell with labels #i also hate slur discourse bc its very simple who can and cant say what #like if youre cishet ofc you cant say a slur #and nonbinary people are trans so we can say a slur dont fuckign diminish our transness you transmed ass freaks #god damn i hate getting riled up about stupid probably 14 year olds on the internet #people are dumb and im tired of them #long story fucking short do what you want just dont be stupid or an asshole #this was a lot of tags

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skunkg1rll · 8 months

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🐕🧸🪟🕯️

#i've been thinking a lot lately abt taking a loan to finish my upper secondary/high school studies #i get financial aid atm #but it is soooo little money and the past few yrs with the 'inflation' etc #it just is pretty close to impossible to afford anything #it's also just miserable #i didnt wanna take loans for it bc just as everyone else im gnna need a loan to study at university #but like also...... we are killing this planet #i mean if we're optimistic the real issues where armageddeon starts might be in 2030 #but since emissions r only increasing it's gnna be earlier prob #so in short: we are fucked and we're all gonna die soon #does it rlly matter then if i have loans????#loans WILL make my life now more bearable #and with the way our future is looking... whew. all we have is NOW nd maybe tmrw #so yeah im gonna take a loan to finish high school #but it's difficult bc i've been living like this for 5 years #i have no idea how it works to apply to courses and apply for a loan etc etc #it's so scary and lmao i have avpd!!!!!!#but im gonna do it #i WANNA do it #it's gonna be like x3 the amount of money i have now #so ughhhh want it so bad. rven if im gnna have to pay it off (if we dont all die in the apocalypse)#i dont care. i cant live like this anymore it is miserable

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