#i think i’m the funniest person alive

[atopvisenyashill]

*tom sevenstrings strumming in the background* he is not one of uuuuuuuuuus!!!!

[uhwhiskeytango]

bi-curious? naw babe i’m bi-serious

[pipsavedmylife]

Lmao who is this

[stealingyourbones]

Note to self: draw Danny saying “man I feel like death warmed over” as he’s still smoking, just yot out of the portal after turning on the button.

[cockquettebelle]

I wish I was a Dorcas kinnie… unfortunately I’m an annoying piece of shit who never shuts the fuck up, so I’m probably a Barty kinnie :/

[cissa-calls]

Countdown to Agatha All Along: Day 843

Agatha and Y/N: *opens door*

Wanda: “Well, how was the play? Did you enjoy it?

Y/N: “It was wonderful!…at least what we saw”

Agatha: “The theatre has changed a lot since I last went, the etiquette? The structure? Dull.”

Wanda: “Wait, back up: what you saw? Did it not finish?”

Y/N: “The finale is actually happening as we speak, but we had to depart early…for reasons.”

Agatha: “Apparently you’re not allowed to “throw rotten fruit at the actors anymore” or something silly.”

Y/N: “You grand-slammed a tomato into Romeo’s face when he was crying over Juliet’s corpse!”

Agatha: “How else are you supposed to let the actor know they suck? It’s called audience input! Can no one can take a critique anymore?”

Y/N: “Yes, but those are usually transmitted via an online review! Not by making Elizabethan instant pasta sauce on the actors!”

Y/N: “The worst part of all of this? Now I’ll never know how it ends!”

Wanda: “To Romeo and Juliet? THE most popular Shakespeare tragedy?”

Agatha to Wanda: “Can I throw a tomato at them?”

[che-ezits]

Here you joe

[ninyard]

Genuine question, are you going to do any more in universe twitter posts? No pressure obviously. They are some of my favorite things in this fandom (your mind Holly shit) there so accurate and I can’t even imagine what you’d come up with after tsc (god help my fragile heart) ❤️

Yes I am!! Currently trying to think about when Twitter would’ve popped off and so far all I’ve got it

- Neil’s new look after the nest

- Twitter finds out about Nathaniel Wesninski

- Aaron Minyard Arrested For Murder / Andrew Minyard Sent To A Mental Institution

- Reactions to the Kathy Ferdinand show

After that I’m not too sure what would’ve been public knowledge and in turn free rein for the Twitter stans. Maybe Seth dying? I don’t know! If there’s anything you’d like to see that I haven’t done already or isn’t listed there pls let me know because I love making them so much

Here’s a stupid tweet that didn’t make the cut on any of the other posts, to tide you over until I get this next one done:

Appreciate you ❤️

[c0rvidfagg0try]

The best of my live reaction to S1 of Beastars:

[snail-eggs]

guess being a cop didn’t pan out, bro is out here doing doordash

[asteriskemily]

Monster High x Batman Prompt #3:

(Two zombies walk into a library)

Ghoulia Yelps is in her freshman year of college at the Monster University of Gotham (someone more clever than me can think of monster puns for all that)

She knows it’s probably (definitely) a bad idea to go out into the human city parts of the city, but she finds it absolutely fascinating to observe the culture of these normies. Besides, a little bit of makeup can go a long way to making her pale skin look a bit more lively. As long as she doesn’t speak zombie and give herself away.

Ghoulia finds herself, as she so often does, at the Gotham City Public Library. She enjoys this library quite a bit, both because of its extensive collection and because of the kind staff. One librarian in particular, a red haired woman in a wheelchair who introduced herself as Barbara, went so far as to offer to teach her sign language when she found out that Ghoulia couldn’t speak to her. (Of course Ghoulia does know sign language, but only MSL, monster sign language.)

Most days Ghoulia prefers to read books on normie history or biology, but today she finds herself perusing the fiction section, specifically the classics.

As Ghoulia flips through the novel she picked up (Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen. She’d thought she’d heard someone mention that there were zombies in this book, but that doesn’t seem to be the case.) she accidentally runs directly into a very tall (and very handsome) normie man.

Instinctually, she apologizes for running into him, forgetting for a moment that this human most likely would not understand zombie, but to her surprise, he does. He even responds in zombie himself.

The man introduces himself as Jason, and the two of them talk about the book she’s reading (apparently it’s one of his favorites). Throughout the conversation, Ghoulia slowly comes to realize that this man doesn’t seem to even know he’s speaking zombie, as if he’s doing it instinctual.

By the time Ghoulia has to go back to her dorm, they had exchanged numbers (she’s at least 70% sure that his phone number will be compatible with her coffinphone) and agreed to meet for a coffee date later that week.

[sparkystar26888]

I just read through all of my posts and goddamn I am hilarious. Funny, autistic, and unattainable? The ideal being

[loser-user-noaccuser]

All i do is scream into the void (post to tumblr) and sometimes the void answers (the besties give me notes)

[cinnamostar]

sometimes i wanna do those fake texts i see on here for skz but im so lazy skekwknsn i use to do those for bts in like 2014/2015 and it was fun for a biiiit but then i got lazy KSMKEIEKW

[sodepopcorn]

Not a top or a bottom but a secret third thing

[segretecose]

“but since i stan dad i’m alive and well” being said, nay rapped, by the most unalive and unwell person in the room is still one of the funniest moments in prestige television history i think