#i think im no longer weird with men. like i used to be afraid? but not like really. i just avoided them like a plague

[tchaikovskym]

There is this part of me that wants to wallow in self-pity, that wants to believe I'm doomed forever and that there is nothing good waiting for me. But the funny thing is, it's not true. I am better than I used to be. I am healthier than I used to be. It's just tiring to always try to be better. And while it is a possibility that the doom part of me will turn out to be true, there is a possibility that it won't.

[daddynattt]

omg im so happy i found your blog, you’ve quickly become one of my new favourite writers !! 😭😭

the pussyjob and dirty talk in your latest nat fic was literally so perfect I s(creamed)🫣

Can you please write a fic with Nat that includes tribbing/scissoring? (only if you’re comfortable with it ofc) I think i’ve only seen like two tribbing fics with Nat in the entirety of tumblr so i’d love to see how you do with it! <33

you and me both! lol. thank you so much<3 i hope you enjoy this

You’re Mine

Summary: When Natasha sees you and Wanda dancing at one of Tony’s famous parties, she does what she can to steal you away and show you who you really belong to.

Pairings: Natasha Romanoff x Reader , Brief Wanda Maximoff x Reader

Warnings: Possesive Nat, Jealous Nat, Smut, Scissoring, Fluff, Tony being Tony.

Word Count: 2.4k

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You looked in the mirror for the final time as you put on your jewelry and walked out of your room at the compound. Tony is having another one of his parties and said everyone has to attend that they can’t get out of it. You hated his parties as all anyone did was get black out drunk and sleazy men would always try to hit on you. If you were being honest, you only wanted one person to hit on you and that was a certain red head. Your relationship with Natasha was a weird one. At times she would appear stone cold, only interacting when you went on missions together or had team gatherings. Other times the two of you would flirt and play this game of cat and mouse. Lately, she has been around you more and has made flirtatious jokes along with lingering touches here and there. Your crush on the assassin was one that you can’t get rid of no matter how many times you told yourself she didn’t want you in a romantic way.

You sigh as you enter through the doors and look around you. Tony was at the bar taking shots with Bucky and Sam, already looking like he couldn’t stand on his own two feet for much longer. Steve was chatting with Wanda and Clint in the corner by the bar and Natasha was talking to some guy you’ve not once seen in your entire time of being an Avenger and living in the compound. You roll your eyes as you make your way towards the bar, already desperately needing a drink to get some alcohol in your system. You’re just going to stay at the party for one hour tops and make your way back to your room so you can lay in bed and watch the show that you’re currently watching. 

“Y/n! so nice of you to finally join us” you hear Tony slur from beside you, a cup in his hand of God knows what. You stare at him as he stumbles and almost falls. “How are you already this drunk at your own party?” you ask him bewilderingly. He taps you on the back quite harshly, the sudden force catching you off guard as you almost spill your drink on yourself as you stumble forward in your seat. “Watch it Stark, I am not afraid to kick your ass” you glare at him as you put your drink back on the bar countertop. He raises his hands in defense and smirks at you. “Now now no need to get so aggressive, leave that for a certain red head” You roll your eyes and glare at him again but the light tint of pink on your cheeks gives you away. 

“How about you shut your mouth because I have no clue what you’re talking about” you take a sip of your drink and turn away from him as you look around you once more. You smile as you see Wanda approaching you, inviting her with a wave of your hand to sit beside you. She smiles at you as she takes the seat next to you. “Is Tony bothering you?” she laughs at your annoyed expression when he quickly denies it. You ignore him as you smile at her. “When isn’t he? he’s so annoying” you say the last part loud enough so he could hear you. Wanda giggles and smiles brightly at you, and you can’t deny that she looks absolutely gorgeous when she does so.

“That’s Tony for you, i’m surprised you even showed up to the party” You smile at her and take another sip of your drink. “Well, he basically forced us and I didn’t want to face his wrath if I didn’t show up tonight, you know how he is. Besides, my company at the moment is very lovely” you slide your hand up her arm flirtatiously and you relish in the way she smiles shyly at you, a light blush accompanying her cheeks. You smile at her and get up, putting your hand out for her to grab. 

“Would you like to dance with me?” she smiles and grabs your hand, walking the two of you towards the dance floor. “I would love to, cmon” The two of you dance together, her arms around your neck as yours go around her waist, her body so close to you that you feel her breath on your face. You have a feeling that someone is watching you so you look to the side and notice Natasha looking

in your direction, a hard glare fixated towards the back of Wanda’s head. You smirk as you pull Wanda closer, if that is even possible, as you whisper something in her ear. You see Natasha walking towards you guys from the corner of your eye, her eyes not once leaving yours. 

“Hi ladies, so Y/n, I thought you said you were going to come find me so we could dance” you smile at her as you look into her eyes. “Hmm did I? I don’t recall, I was actually enjoying my dance with Wanda” her gaze is hard as she looks at you, her jaw clenched as she grabs onto your arm. “Well I guess it’s my turn now, sorry Wanda but i’m going to steal Y/n for a moment” before Wanda has a chance to speak, you’re being dragged away and out of the party. “What the hell Nat? what are you doing?” the wind gets knocked out of you as you’re slammed into the wall somewhere away from the party.

“Shut up. Did you enjoy your dance with the little witch? Tell me, or did you wish it was me instead?” she has that stupid smirk on her face that always makes you feel some type of way, her face is so close to yours you could almost taste the lipgloss on her lips. 

Before you can say anything, her lips are on yours in a bruising kiss that makes your stomach swoop, the butterflies in your stomach going haywire as your brain finally catches up and you kiss her back with the same intensity. When you feel the need to catch air in your lungs so you don’t pass out, she pulls back first and cups your jaw in her hand as she stares into your eyes. “You’re mine Y/n, and i’m going to show you who you belong to” you two make your way to your shared room and stumble through the door, her lips on yours the second you close it shut. Your head feels fuzzy as all you feel and taste is her. You have been waiting for this moment for so long and you are going to enjoy every second of it. 

You feel her hot breath on your neck as she kisses you there, leaving love bites wherever her mouth reaches, her hands on your butt as she squeezes you there. You run your hands through her hair and moan in her ear. “Nat please, I need you” you pant out as you feel her tongue licking your earlobe, biting it right after. You feel her sucking on your neck again, no doubt leaving many marks that will for sure be hard to cover up. You think she is trying to claim her mark, and the thought of it leaves you even more wet then you already are. She rids you from your dress leaving you in only your panties, pushing you towards the bed and laying you on your back. 

She kisses you hard and shoves her tongue in your mouth, the feeling of her tongue against yours making the ache in your core start to feel uncomfortable . You need her now as the overwhelming feeling of her has become too much for you to handle. She kisses down your chest, taking your nipple in her mouth as she sucks on it. You can feel your slick running down your thigh as you are unbelievably wet for her. “Fuck nat, just like that, feels so good” she bites your nipple and kisses down your body, she lays down as she gets in between your legs. She slides off your panties and spreads your legs wide as she admires her view, breathing in your scent as her mouth waters.

“God you are so wet for me baby, you’re absolutely dripping. I can’t wait to taste your sweet pussy” she licks your juices from your inner thighs, your breathing picking up at the overwhelming feeling of her mouth on you. You run your hand through her hair and tug her closer to where you need her most.

“Please Natty, stop teasing me, need your mouth so bad” you mewl out breathlessly as you look down at her. She gives you a long lick from the bottom to the top of your clit, gathering your taste on her tongue. She starts to lick your folds, looking up at you as she sucks your clit into her mouth. “You taste so fucking good baby, the best pussy i’ve ever had” you moan loudly as her tongue hits you in all the right places, feeling her stick her finger inside you as she sucks on your clit again. “Shit you’re so tight, you feel so warm around me” she fucks you with one finger then slowly adds another one, moving them in and out of you expertly. You are dripping wet that once you adjust, you swallow her fingers as she fucks you deep. “F-fuck don’t stop, that feels so fucking good” she moans against your clit as your nails scratch at her scalp as she fucks you faster, the vibration making your eyes roll to the back of your head. Her mouth and fingers feel so good that you can’t think of anything else. You’re close and she knows it as you clench around her fingers.

She moves up your body and sucks on your earlobe as she fucks you deep and hard, as she whispers in your ear, her voice hot and raspy. “You gonna cum for me baby? Cum all over my fingers, that’s it baby, such a good girl for me” after a few more thrusts you cum hard on her fingers as a strong orgasm washes over you, your breathing is heavy as she rides out your high. You lay there panting as you try to catch your breath. 

She slides her fingers out and you whimper from the loss of feeling, she brings her fingers to your mouth and looks into your eyes. “Open” you instantly obey and suck on her fingers, moaning at your taste. She bites her lip and gets up from the bed and takes off her clothes, joining you in finally getting naked. You bite your lip as you admire her, you’ve never seen someone more beautiful then her. You don’t know if your mind is just hazy from your orgasm but you think you see a hint of a blush on her cheeks and the thought makes your heart swell in your chest. “God Nat, you’re so beautiful” she smiles at you and joins you back on the bed as she kisses you. 

You feel her slick against your thigh and the fact that she is so wet from only pleasing you makes you feel immense pride. She pulls back from the kiss as she bites your bottom lip. “Fuck I wanna feel you, i’m gonna grind on you baby. Wanna feel your pussy against mine” she spreads your legs as she hovers over you, grinding herself on you, the feeling of her wet folds against yours igniting a feeling inside you that you’ve never felt before. “Fuck your pussy feels so good, it’s like it was made for me” she grinds on you faster, her clit hitting yours perfectly as she glides back and forth. You’ve never scissored with anyone before, the feeling of her pussy against yours makes you feel so unbelievably dirty, you’ve never felt something as good as this.

Your eyes roll to the back of your head as she grinds faster, your legs slightly shaking as her pussy feels so good against yours. “God i’m gonna fucking cum, gonna cum on your pussy. Fuck you feel amazing, oh fuck i’m coming!” she sloppily grinds on you as both your orgasms wash over you, your body twitching as she rides out both of your highs, you are so sensitive that you can’t handle anymore. She breathes heavily as she looks down at you, your hair sticking to your forehead and your chest heaving, you’ve never looked more beautiful. She looks at you through hooded eyes and starts grinding on you again. You try to push her off as you’re unbelievably sensitive. “I can’t anymore Nat, ‘m too sensitive” she keeps grinding as she’s not far off from another orgasm. “Just one more princess, your pussy feels so fucking good against mine, fuck” both your clits were so swollen that the feeling of them hitting each other once more had you both so close to your release. “Yes yes yes, don’t stop Nat, i’m gonna cum” you were both so wet that squishing sounds could be heard in the air of the room as both your cunts rubbed together. “Oh fuck, Nat!” you scream her name as an even more powerful orgasm washes over you then the last one, your body shaking and twitching as she slumps against you, the both of you trying to catch your breath. 

“That was amazing” she kisses you sloppily as she continues to lay on top of you, relishing in the warmth your body provides. You lazily run your hand up and down her back as you smile. “So not that i’m complaining, because i’m definitely not, but what brought this on?” her raspy laugh makes you shiver and she looks up at you from your chest. “I got jealous seeing you and Wanda all over each other. I know i’m not an easy person to understand but I have feelings for you and want to be with you. I didn’t want to lose my chance before it was too late” you can see the insecurity in her eyes as she gazes up at you, you know she isn’t always in touch with her feelings so for her to be vulnerable with you in this moment, means more to you then she will ever know. You smile softly at her and stroke her cheek. “I’m yours Natty, I always have been. I want to be with you and only you”

[sca-rian]

my howl's moving castle inspired au, the long masterpost:

*will use scar's moving castle as a tag for this!

consider: grian manages a family business with his sister, pearl. their life is anything but glamorous, and grian doesnt have much prospects of ever leaving his town and doing something different. he hears stories about big cities full of possibilities, magic (hes isnt sure if he believes in that), a moving castle and a handsome wizard who steals the hearts of young women;

one day, grian gets cursed by the wizard of the wastes (joel), after he comes into his shop late in the shift and they get into a heated discussion over the existence (or lack, thereof) of magic. joel thinks of it all as just a silly prank, a curse that can be easily lifted or is just naturally disappearing after a few days;

joel girlbossed too close to the sun, though. the curse is bad. grian wakes up finding out that his body has started to grow feathers. its uncomfortable and borderline painful at times, specially on his back;

after properly freaking out, he tries to deal with it as best as he can, chugging some painkillers, wearing oversized clothes and going to work as if nothing is wrong. pearl notices something unusual, tho—perhaps its grian's murderous expression whenever he remembers joel's face. hes going to kill that bastard;

the curse gets progressively worse as the days go by, until grian can no longer easily hide it and pearl finds out by the ungodly amount of feathers spread around their house. she, of course, gets worried, and tell grian they need to find the wizard that cursed him somehow, or perhaps asks someone else for help;

they dont know any other witches and wizards, since, until last week, grian was pretty sure those didnt even exist. until pearl mentions that one dude who apparently steal hearts and was around town with his moving castle;

grian tells her thats a legend to scare young people so they wont go around talking to strangers. pearl argues that she knew of a lady who disappeared after allegedly spending time with the wizard;

grian supposes that man, if he actually exists, isnt the most trustworthy. but 1. hes not a young lady, which appears to be the ones who get their hearts stolen and 2. he has nothing to lose, really, besides some of his time;

pearl offers to go with him, but grian insists for her to stay (shes a young woman, after all). so grian leaves by himself in good old ghibli fashion: taking with him nothing but a block of cheese, some bread and a clock;

he founds the moving castle with ease: its ridiculously big and it makes no sense at all, having many weird bump outs, few windows, a dramatic copper roof and many chimneys. if anything, it looked like the weirdest house ever and nothing like a castle. something about it was still charming, tho: he just couldnt point out what.

development for this au just started, but so far it includes:

scar being weird and overly dramatic, but still charming. he also refuses to pay taxes;

cub as scar's weird demon roommate, with whom he made a contract many years ago. cub is so miserable sometimes that he regrets getting scar's heart (or his soul, whatever). cub keeps the "castle" moving with overly complicated redstone magic and fire that allegedly comes from the depths of hell;

scar sending threatening letters to joel. many of them. demanding for him to break the curse. joel ignores every single one;

he eventually gets pissed and goes with grian to look for joel, who admits the curse wasnt supposed to be that strong and now he doesnt know how to break it. scar turns him into a frog and joel is kept hostage;

joel still does his best to be as annoying as possible despite the limitations of his new body.

it also includes:

scarian falling in love;

found family;

silly cliche romance tropes;

romcom elements;

characters acting like divorced couples;

funky magical men with their funky little spells;

light angst.

i want to write this but im afraid i might not have the time. still want to brainrot tho so im accepting asks! you may also write with this au as long as you credit me! :)

[survivor-north-sea]

Episode Five: "i will not relent!!! u will like me!!!" - Bethany

Hairie

I am not happy with the tribal council but I am also not entirely mad. I’m sad to see Chelsea go. Someone flipped from ex Tromoya and I have a strong feeling it was Zach

-

I partially feel guilty for not choosing Chelsea for tribe swap. She was my alliance and now she’s gone.

Esteban

idk what to expect on this round. I am hearing that bethany is rallying the non-women again and staining my name that I did pushed aj and trinica that much on idol hint. Wth! I would never respect that move. But good for you. Now you are givigng me much time to think and a fire to probably play the game still til the end.

Raffy prob is neutral on which way he wanna go with either bethany’s story or i. Brandi profess that she wanna work with me and she thought jayjay would love too. Jayjay is so welcoming on me and said the same way that she wants me to stay on the game and she is skeptical about bethany and that it make sense she is saying she is like pulling all the ladies again in this new tribe and on her own words she said, “let vote bethany out the first time we will get a chance.”

Hairie, i am still in doubt of him. Idk where he is on this thought process but i told him my truth may it be wrong or not but i am not lying to what i felt is right. 😅

Tyler hopefully he is still on my side. He told me that bethany was caught on the act when she confirm that there is a non-men alliance when tyler was confronted her lying that jinx leaked that information.

On the lighter note: i look horribly crazy in my lip sync. And please let that video just stay here in this ORG. 🙈🙈🙈

-

Late confessionals (strike 1)

Sorry been very busy lately.

We’ve won the music video challenge. Kudos to tomoya 2.0 for giving all the effort and it is worth it.

The vibe went positive in the camp. People sharing thought about have kore advantages so we can win another round of challenge.

I am loving this tribe more than the old one. I hope we will not see the tribal earlier before merge happens.

So far i feel like jayjay and brandi had my back and tyler too. Hoping hairie too. 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽

That tie vote of the hidra tribe is crazy. And chelsea going home i hope will give the og tromoya a chance for us to infiltrate the group.

Cheetos we are holding on. Take care!

Jayjay

Im pretty shocked that it was Chelsea who got voted out this tribal council! I’m sad to see her go she was such a great person! Wondering how the dynamics and alliances are working over on hidra considering I thought the vote was going to be for a male with the info I got from ex hidra team members.

Arvin Bentonon

Oh noooo! My survivor cool mom was voted out. Now I'm in the bottom.

-

I really want Julia to be the gesturer. I think in the music video, Julia showed everyone that she communicates well with actions by giving us nice clean movements.

-

I told Julia that it's either one of us should be the gesturer. So I nominated her in the GC and seems like everybody is on board with it. I'm just so afraid that if one of the rest of them would gesture, they might throw the challenge by confusing us. So I really need to try hard and guess what Julia is trying to act. Just in case they want to throw a challenge, to even out the numbers.

Raffy

Is it weird that I don't really want to win this game? I thought about it and realized that I just want to have fun and meet the newbies. My feelings will probably change sooner or later. But, for now, I'm content with going whichever which way.

Tyler Frazier

So I’m growing a bit concerned about my relationship with Esteban. Prior to the swap he mentioned wanting to work with Raffy and that plus the fact he was able to seemingly instantly integrate himself into the old Tromøya makes me feel like I’m no longer a main priority for him

AJ

I'm honestly pretty hyped for charades. I feel like it's the one in which we have the most even odds. I'm honestly so proud of the femmes and thems alliance rn. Highlight of last round was Zach "uniting" us. Anyway just a short confession until I can give a larger one after the challenge

Raffy

I found an idol! That climbing gear finally came in handy haha. In any case, I think I'll keep this to myself. No use telling everyone and having me be a bigger threat than I already am. Though it does make me question just how many idols are in this game.

Brandi

I’m really hoping to just ride the tromoya train and stay low until the merge - tribal is scary

Arvin Bentonon

I have to made up an advantage, like a legacy advantage if they will believe it, I will be saved by this vote.

Trinica

At this point, Jay's gotta be sick of seeing us at tribal. AND YET.

These advantages/disadvantages are really killing us. We came so close to winning charades!! Julia honestly did an amazing job, and I told her that she doesn't deserve to go home after that performance. I hate to send Arvin home, but I'd feel awful sending Julia home after how well she did.

There are no more idols to be found in the game anymore, which is nerve-wracking. Arvin or Julia could very well have one, so this next vote is going to be tricky. And I'm assuming we've as well as lost the next challenge because AJ and I both landed us with 10% disadvantages. It's not looking good for Hidra (but when is it ever...?)

Esteban

When you thought you don’t care anymore and that you are gonna voted out early then here comes the gods of the seven kingdoms blessing you a safety. Congratulations to tomoya 2.0. raffy did well tbh

Champ

So nervous about losing a challenge! I need to make sure bethany and Tyler stay in this game! If we lose I’m assuming Esteban tyler or bethany will go, and I really want to make it to merge with my entire tribe! Once we merge I feel like I’m in a really good position to make it far

Hairie

We won ... AGAIN! I'm so happy that we did. On top that, the idol or idols has been found and someone or a couple of someones has it. The game is elevating yet again!

Tyler Frazier

So I have the weird sword advantage which would be great if I was certain I’d make the merge but…I’m not. I mean if things go really wrong and Bethany Champ or I get booted then obvi it can be played (I think for them im gonna need to re read) which will be great if we can get out of our current position

Bethany

slayyyy tromoya wins again!!!! im very happy with that because i still dont feel safe here lol but im hoping esteban is starting to see the light and is going to not immediately try and flip on tyler and i

so tyler, champ, and i have a little trio going called brayden's angels which is so cute and tyler and i went idol hunting together today and everything that was good was sold out so like no slay EXCEPT for the 100 coin item

tyler and i had 70 coins combined so we decided to go beg champ for her money too and ms girl is way too loyal and just handed them right over

so tyler bought the sword and it forces a battleback if one of us is eliminated once jury starts which is so fun i love it and im excited because im usually good at comps so that would be perfect if i get voted out lolol

hopefully we can keep the winning streak going and then at the merge i can reunite with all of pink venom and play both sides mwahaha we will see though not trying to get ahead of myself, i just want to try and keep social gaming when we don't have tribal because i don't think tyler is trying as hard with people but it's hard when they leave me on read all day *cough cough* jayjay. but i will not relent!!! u will like me!!!

Arvin Bentonon

Right now, I don't want to talk too much. I just really want to enjoy the process, and maybe someone would talk to me and possibly save me from this vote. The former old hidra tribe thinks I'm running the show with the former tromoya already because I want to talk to almost everyone of them. Now I'm definitely in the chopping block.

Esteban

i don’t know if i am only one of the few people who is happy that the hinting is over. Respect to the host and the fun twist but i still stun a back to basic game where it seperate people who are playing a social, strategic and amazing game to those who are just hoping for luck. 😅.

Do you agree?

Now that it is all over let the survivor back to basic game start! Sorry i was born to play back to basic games. 😂😂😂🤞🏻No more hiding.

AJ

So bad news and even worse news lmfao. We lost the challenge, all idols in the fucking idol hunt have been found, and now idol hunt is closed. Which means we're probably losing up till and into the merge. I can only hope the other tribe has a bunch of disadvantages. We're most likely going into the challenge after next with a net 20% disadvantage unless someone was able to find something. I have my 10% AD at any time, but I will not be using it when we'll still be in the negative and probably still lose.

This next challenge is going to be a 24 hours challenge. What does that mean for AJ? If you guessed zero sleep, you'd be correct!! No matter what it is I'm going to do my absolute best to get us to win it. We NEED a break at some point, honestly, and if it weren't for the advantages we would have won that last challenge. Being on a losing streak isn't fun, but we'll get through it. We always do.

Jayjay

The last charade challenge was a lot of fun. I think Raffy killed it being the gesture, you could tell he definitely gave it his all! Super proud of our team and winning all these challenges. Tromoya strong forevaaaa!!

Hairie

Solidifying my number 1 and we gonna make it to final 3 I’m confident!

-

Strong feelings that either Arvin or Zach going home this next tribal. I’m also thinking Julia might have flipped more so than I initially thought it was Zach. I could be wrong but my guts telling me just that.

Zach🤠

Cant believe we’re going to tribal again. Not a slay. Love that our little panic alliance has stuck together after that one vote to save my ass. AND we have an in with AJ. I have no idea how Julia and Arvin still trust AJ after that last flip, but here we are. I asked Julia why not try to take me down today and she explained to me how similar our games were and how she thought that made us closer and stronger together. And I agree. I can really see myself going a long way with AJ and Jinx.

Arvin Bentonon

I'm not going home without a fight.

Julia

Welp I was blindsided last time and it’s my time to go here. I tried so hard during charades but it wasn’t good enough and I’m heartbroken

jinx

imma keep it so real right now i will ride and die for my alliance but i think we might be the …bad guys…like…we’re really about to be THAT majority alliance huh….erm….chile anyways…did anyone have the chicken?? the chicken was lovely! like we’re girlbossing gaslighting and gatekeeping but at what cost? anyways. i swear if pink venom is reading this post season ITS ONLY BECAUSE WERE A MAJORITY ALLIANCE MAKING THINGS BORING 😭 but we’re a majority of minorities….like WIG!!!!! taking the power back!!!! but are we taking too much??? who’s to say! anyways no jinxcast this round simply because i aint got shit to say! saving it for my actual journal. love y’all! xoxo gossip jinx

Toni

Theme: Anxiety and Alliances

Hello World.

What a shaky Tribal we had on Sunday. We were still strategising by the initial tribal time - thank god it was delayed. The feeling of having my name out there is a feeling I did not enjoy. If anything had gone wrong I would have gone home. The game is getting harder. I started this game confident in my gut feeling but even though I've never been on the wrong side of the vote I can feel my anxiety rising.

I'm grateful for the alliances I've built here and over on the other tribe but the game is getting harder. You do genuinely connect with some of these people and it starts to creep into your heart when you choose to vote them out. We're voting Julia out today and even though I initially misunderstood her I've recently really connected with her on our mutual love for the WNBA. I'm sad. I do have to stay true to my word and loyal to my alliance. Still I'm sad.

Signing off safe but sad.

AJ

Can't remember if I've submitted one of these this round or not. Better safe than sorry so I'm doing that now. We're betraying Julia which is sad because I do really like her, but there's been some good points made for her vote out. Julia when this comes out ily, sorry for my vote

[lovely-echoo]

Sleepy Bois Inc x FranBow!Reader

In-game AU

Part 1/? Pt.2

Plantonic!SBI x Young!Reader

(10/11 years old)

OneShot/Drabble(?)

Genderneutral reader (they/them) 💜

INFO; If you haven't played or seen game play of Fran Bow then you can skip this if you'd like. If you don't care then go ahead.

Summary; Basically if you've seen/played the game you should know how this goes, you take place of Fran. So you go/went through the same things she did and you still have Mr. Midnight. This takes place while Fran is still in the mental hospital and then got teleported near the SBI.

Honestly I kept thinking about this but was afraid to request it to anyone so I'm doing it my myself-

If I get any info wrong, I'm sorry! I rewatched Markiplier's game play so it shouldn't be way off.

P.s not everything is described the same.

(^ art by sunquids on twt)

CW/TW: mentions/includes of cussing, gore, death, blood, consumption of medication, sexual assault (brief mentions of Damian/The King)

Fluff/Normal

(Angst if you squint)

How you ended up there - How you met Philza and Technoblade

As you were walking around the hospital, you decided to take a pill to see if it'll help.

You watched as your vision blurred and some sort of demonic noises rang in your ears.

After a few seconds your vision cleared up, you took a look around the front desk.

The once dull and lifeless room had turned into this even duller and just plain deathly like room.

Blood was everywhere, random body parts of babies where thrown around. A skeletal figure was hung with what looked like an umbilical cord wrapped around its thin bones, it was connected to this baby covered by a blue blanket.

Just about everything looked grotesque.

Suddenly the floor ahead of you opened and this slimy black tentacle like arm grabbed you by the waist and pulled you in.

It seemed you may have passed out during your fall because you woke up to the sounds of hissing and supposedly two men.

Oh and let's not forget the killer headache causing the ringing in your ears. :)

You rubbed your eyes as you sat up, the light around you seemed much brighter than before.

You looked at the two men in front of you and then glanced down, you spotted Mr. Midnight!

His fur was spiked up and his ears were flat against his head. He seemed to be trying to protect you from the men.

Ignoring their presence you immediately scooped up your precious fur baby in your arms.

Your mind completely forgot about the fact there are two strange looking men in front of you.

A few droplets of water dripped down your (S/C) cheeks onto your (F/C) shirt/dress.

You started crying, so much happened in a short period of time and you found your cat you oh so desperately tried to find.

It panicked one of the adults. Said adult was an average tall man with slightly longer blond hair than average, he also had a green and white striped bucket hat. But what stuck out the most was the large pair of wings behind his back.

At first you thought that it was your pills fault but everywhere around you looked….

Normal?

It seemed like your meds wore off while you supposedly passed out.

But that doesn’t help or ease you at all. If the side effects wore off then how the hell did he have wings?!

The blond walked towards you slowly, like you were an injured puppy. His blue eyes roamed around your body, as if studying your every mouvements.

The other man who was beside him earlier seemed to tense up and looked at him as if he grew another head. He was on edge you assumed.

But he looked even weirder to you. He had long pink hair tied into a loose braid falling over his shoulder. Was it natural? He also had tusks peeking out from his bottom lip, they were large but not enough to be in the way. His skin seemed to be on the pinker side, it was roughed up with scars and calloused in certain areas. You noticed he had pig ears poking out his crown. Is he a king of sorts? Wait, that reminds you of someome... Oh! The king of course!

Ah yes, the king. You quite missed him actually, he was playful and let you use his cane- sword to get a key. But he didn't know about that part. You wonder if he's doing alright right know, the asylum sucks. And the shadow thing next to him said weird things to. Who exactly is the holy man? Why'd the shadow say he took off his clothes?

You couldn't dwell on it to much as you got distracted by the approaching man.

He reached out his hand to stop the winged male. “Phil-”

But the man named ‘Phil’ interrupted the crowned male by putting up his hand. He stopped his hand and let it limp to his side.

“It’s alright Tech, they seem harmless.” ‘Phil’ reassured, though ‘Tech’ nodded his head with a stern expression. There was still hesitance in his sharp red eyes.

‘Phil’ took the same hand he put up and reached it out to you. A soft and kind look in his eyes, you could’ve gotten lost in them if you weren’t careful.

“You alright there kid?” He asked, crouching down to meet your height from where you sat.

“Y-yeah, I think so…” You winced, your throat was hoarse and dry. You peered at ‘Phil’ as he took out this glass bottle with what you assumed was water.

He handed you the fragile bottle, he saw the look of hesitance in your childlike eyes. But something about them set off alarms in his head, they were dull. There’s nothing wrong with that of course! But they were too dull, at least for a mere kid.

He recognized a glint of trauma in your (Eye Shape) eyes, those beautiful (E/C) orbs had seen something they shouldn’t have. Haven’t they?

“Don’t worry mate, it’s fresh water.” He examined the way you handled the cork, you were inexperienced. He could tell you’ve never needed to do it, but why? It’s really the only way so far to keep water with you.

Did you not have any?

While he was lost in thought, you just had noticed he had an accent of sorts. Nothing wrong with it, you've just never heard of someone with it.

(^ Ignore that if you are british)

While the winged male was off in his own world the piglin hybrid watched as you sniffed the clear liquid in suspicion before letting your cat smell it as if you were looking for their approval.

To his surprise they did give it to you, the black cat nodded it’s head and squeaked out a meow. That strangely sounded like a yes- but he dismissed the thought. Probably was just the voices fucking with him.

You gulped down the water as if you hadn’t had any for months.

‘Why tf are they so desperate-’ ‘lowkey kinda concerned lmao’ ‘they look like they’d be an orphan tho’ ‘lmao maybe’ ‘idc about the kid, i want the cat’ ‘absolutely-’ ‘Nah fuck the cat, im allergic.’ ‘lol and?’ 'PFT ANY ASKERS???'

Those were all different voices speaking and overlapping each other.

Technoblade sighed as he glanced at his father, he knew him on the back of his hand. He let him be and slowly walked next to Phil and kneeled down.

“What’s your name kid?” he asked, taking the empty bottle you had handed him. “(Y/n), (Y/n) (L/n)/Bow.” You bluntly answered, looking at him in the eyes. He noticed how bloodshot they were, I mean you did cry not even 5 minutes ago.

"What's yours?" You questioned tilting your head a bit in the process.

Unbeknownst to you, some voices in a certain someone's head were losing their shit, squealing and chanting ‘protecc tiny bean’ over and over again.

"The name's Technoblade, but you can call me Techno." Strange name in your book but your not the one to judge. You simply nodded your head in acknowledgement.

"That guy is Philza, but you can call him Phil." He pointed his thumb to the unfocused man. Technoblade or Techno- cleared his throat.

“You’ve got somewhere to stay? Where are your parents?” “Why can’t you mind your business?”

Techno’s eyes twitched in annoyance and his teeth clenched to hold back any crude words.

Although he noticed the flash of pain in those dull (E/C) orbs of the mentions of your parents.

He sighed once again, something you noticed he did a lot. At least, so far he did.

“Look kid, do you have a place to stay or not?”

And that's how you ended up meeting your new family. . . <3

I may include a taglist if anyone's up to be tagged lmao

[imjeralee]

can you maybe write for Childe, Zhongli, Link, and Human!Revali where theyre immortal or live for a very long time, and one day their s/o gets hurt and dies in their arms? then years later they stumble across them again, theyre a different person but they have the same soul. yet.. they dont remember them right away...but then they fall in love again? im feeling angsty, apologies

Hi anon! thanks for the ask and sorry for the delay!! I’m afraid I wasn’t able to write a Link and Human!Revali headcanon for the time being (I will write and post Link and Revali HCs later, sorry!!!!!) but I was able to write something for Childe and Zhongli for now so here goes.

PS they’re really long so it’s below the cut. I might as well have written some fanfics on this since they’re pretty much stories XD

Childe: 

WARNINGS for violence/blood here -

When he’s dispatched the last of your attackers, he rushes back to your side and finds you lying on the ground. At first he thinks you’re playing as you usually tease each other, and so he drops beside you with a hefty sigh before he scoops you up and into his arms.

“Hey, you good? Don’t tell me those guys gave you a run for your money,” he says, grinning. He’s out of breath, sweating slightly.

When you don’t reply, however, at first he thinks you’re still teasing but it’s quickly replaced with concern. He knows something is wrong. You let out a pained moan and close your eyes, murmuring his name weakly. His playful, jovial attitude dissolves into panic. Childe sits up properly with you in his arms, giving you a little shake and asking what’s wrong.

As he turns you round in his arms, he notices you’re bleeding profusely from a grievous wound. No longer smiling, panic takes ahold of him. “What happened? No, no, no, this can’t be. This can’t be happening. Stay with me Y/N, stay with me.” Planting his hands on the sides of your face, making you look at him. “Look at me. That’s it. Just keep looking at me. You’re gonna be okay. You’re gonna be okay.” He keeps chanting that over and over again as he glances around the area frantically before he attempts to lift you off the ground but you stop him. It’s too late.

Instead, you merely hold his hand firmly and he entwines your fingers together and you see the fear and despair in his eyes. You tell him you’re not going to make it but he shakes his head. 

“Everything’s gonna be okay, you hear? Teucer’s waiting for you to take him to the seaside, remember? We were…we were meant to go to the seaside together.” 

As he speaks, he holds you tightly and he feels your laborious breathing against his chest and he keeps talking until you go still and quiet in his arms and he stops. At first, he can’t bear to bring himself to look at you and holds you firmly against his chest, resting his chin atop your head, closing his eyes. 

Then he begins to weep.

A broken man, Childe vows revenge, swearing vengeance on your killers. In a blind rage, he spends countless of years hunting them down one by one. It’s not hard to achieve considering he has all the time in the world. His most recent excursion leads him to the final ringleader who lives in a citadel. Childe kills all the guards and everyone else who stands in his way until he reaches his target. At first, the man fights him but Childe overpowers him easily.

“Who the hell are you?” the man screams.

Childe rips off his mask to reveal his face. “Remember me?” He snarls.

The man goes wide-eyed and tries to run away with Childe in pursuit, but before Childe can reach him, the man has grabbed a random person in his way and thrown them onto Childe’s path as a human shield.

“Father!?” Childe hears the person exclaiming in shock as they’re roughly shoved towards Childe’s direction. Childe realises the man has grabbed their kid to use as the human shield. 

Disgusted, Childe is about to deal the finishing blow until he catches them mid fall and their gazes meet; those eyes. They remind him of….you

And something deep inside him screams STOP! And Childe is briefly brought to a halt in his rampage. He doesn’t recognise them, but he feels your soul within.

What the frick? You had reincarnated into this bastard’s kid??? He’s shocked for a brief moment and a few guards who are still alive manage to sneak up on him. Childe returns to action mode and fights off his attackers, grabs you, and whilst he doesn’t get the chance to kill his target, he escapes the citadel with you in his clutches and you’re left screaming for help.

You’ve been abducted by Childe and he’s taken you to the forest where he pins you against the tree and forces you to look at him, left and right, up and down. Whilst you plead and beg for mercy with your eyes squeezed shut and knees quaking, he lets go of you harshly. He doesn’t want to believe it’s you, but there’s no doubt about it. He senses your soul within. He recognises your eyes. You’ve reincarnated. 

“Show me.” He demands.

“…What?”

“Your birthmark. The one on your shoulder?”

“I-I don’t know what you’re talking about. I don’t have any-”

“Don’t lie to me.”

He turns you round and pulls on your shirt to expose the back of your shoulder where your birthmark is. Whilst you wonder how the hell he knows you have a mark, he lets go of you then and you quickly pull your clothes back on properly, face red. What the hell!!! 

Childe just staring at you in brief shock. 

“It’s you. It’s really you.”

A lot of emotions are going through him right now; he’s relived and so damn happy, at the same time he’s like confused and angry by the whole situation

But the first thing he does is hug you tightly.

And the first thing you do is grab the nearest rock and bludgeon his head with it.

He’s taken aback and lets go of you, stumbling backwards with a bleeding head but he easily shakes off your assault and throws the rock to the side and you’re terrified, inching away as he goes, “Did you think that would kill me? I’ll let you in a little secret; I’m immortal.” 

Not really sure who/what you’re dealing with, you flee but you hear him yelling, “You can run but you can’t hide!”

And as you toss a glance over your shoulder, he’s still standing there for a split second before he promptly vanishes from his spot. This weird cat and mouse game ensues with Childe stalking you through the forest and you’re either trying to run or hide until he finally catches you and pins you against the ground. You can’t escape.

“Calm down. I’m not going to hurt you,” he murmurs, but you don’t believe him. “Just…stay with me for a few days, okay?”

It doesn’t matter; over the next few days, you’re effectively Childe’s prisoner and he seems to enjoy teasing you; he tried to talk to you but you refused and ignored him. It was quite difficult to do so especially when its time for dinner and he’s cooking grilled tiger fish - which is actually your favourite food - and although you’re salivating, he looks at you and grins and waves the grilled tiger fish on a stick in front of you, going, “Hungry?”

You turn away with a frown and he shrugs, “Suit yourself. But I know it’s your favourite.”

You’re confused and about to ask him, but you hear him eating and throw a glance at him to see he’s chomping down and your stomach rumbles. You choose to sleep instead to ignore the hunger but you wake up during the night, starving.

“Eat this,” says a voice, and a grilled tiger fish is plopped down in front of you and Childe is there, crouching by your side. He leaves you alone so you can eat.

You’re surprised by your captor’s behaviour and you initially hate him for what he’s done however he doesn’t harm you in any way. He doesn’t keep you tied up or anything and he’s quite entertained should you ever try to run away because he’ll always just catch up to you and just pick you up and throw you over his shoulder or something and carry you back. 

Your travels with Childe continues but you don’t get the feeling that he hates you or wants to hurt you in anyway. In fact, he keeps surprising you by providing you with your favourite food, favourite drinks and other stuff. It confuses you and though you want to ask him, you’re a little too afraid as to what he might just tell you. Some days you even come across him looking at you a little forlornly but just when you notice, he changes in a split second and will grin at you. Even when it’s nighttime and you’re meant to take a bath, he won’t perv on you. When you arrive at the next village, he asks for a nice room for the two of you and allows you to take the bed, eat as much as you want etc etc. In fact, he’s….taking care of you. He even starts buying you things and whilst you turn down everything he offers, you see his expression crumble and you don’t know what he’s trying to do.

One night he sleeps in the open and you grab a knife, about to drive it in his throat although you’re not sure how much good that’ll do but then you hear him murmur, “You don’t know it…but I’ve been looking for you forever…and I’ve been waiting for you for such a long time… and you end up being the kid of that bastard…the one who killed you, the one who took you away from me….the one who started all this in the first place…”

Confused by what you had just heard, you watch him in steely silence before you slowly lower your hand and put away the knife. The next day he goes “I know what you were trying to do last night. Why didn’t you do it?” 

“I didn’t want to. I’m not a killer like you.” You quip back, but he merely laughs. 

The days continue but the dynamic seems to have changed; when Childe gets you something, you start thanking him and he goes red in the face and you also begin to feel weird around him. Before long, you’re both having food together, having some conversations and you’re accustomed to travelling around with him. He’ll always keep you safe and make sure you have a warm bed each night too. Sometimes when he looks at you, you don’t look away either.

Before long, your father’s men finally catches up; they begin to hunt you and Childe down and you’re stunned when you realised you’re about to get rescued. Something terrible flickers in your mind - maybe you don’t want to be rescued and you want to stay with Childe? After all, he’s taken you to so many places and you’ve seen so many things. Your father kept you cooped up in the citadel for years and this is really the first time you’ve experienced freedom.

Also, you don’t want Childe to get caught. You want him to run away. But he won’t run away without you. And when you question this, he goes, “I can’t afford to lose you again!!”

During the chase, a bunch of arrows are fired towards your direction and you’re worried about Childe, but when the arrows are about to hit you, you squeeze your eyes shut but nothing happens. Reopening your eyes, you see Childe has shield you with his body.

You’re surrounded and as Childe falls, collapsing into your arms, he’s quickly captured and you are returned home. But everything feels boring and dull now, and your father seems more occupied in torturing Childe than checking to see if you’re alright. You ask your father what happened between him and Childe and he tells you he killed his lover many years ago and now Childe has been seeking revenge. When you ask him why he killed Childe’s lover, your father just laughs and says there was no reason.

You’re conflicted. What is this? Why do you feel pity for Childe, and anger towards your father? Why do you feel you are more on Childe’s side now?

I’m in love with him, you realise -- much to your shock. 

Your father announces Childe will be executed by dawn and you hastily rush to where they’re holding him, hoping not to be seen. When you find Childe, he’s badly beaten but still alive and you quickly unshackle him and as he sees you freeing him, he smiles at you; when the last of his shackle is unlocked, he falls forwards but you catch him and your gazes meet.

“Go,” you whisper.

“Not without you. Come with me.” He murmurs, placing a hand to your cheek. “I can’t lose you again.”

You don’t even need to think twice, nodding.

Zhongli

He didn’t think you would ever die... and in his arms no less. He found you after the battle and when he saw that you were grievously wounded, he could not believe his eyes. He was too late and unable to save you, so he merely held you in his arms as you told him with weak breaths that this was the end. He promises that he’ll find you again and holds you tightly as he feels your warmth slowly disappearing, the life escaping from your eyes and then you were simply…gone

For a while, he merely sat with you in the ashen field, cradling you tightly to his chest before he picked you up and retreated silently. No one would see him for several centuries following that but it was rumoured he went to the mountains to bury you. He was in mourning.

Zhongli never forgot you and his love for you never went away so he’s comforted by the fact that your soul will be reincarnated albeit into a different vessel and as he promised, begins to search for your whereabouts when it’s finally time.

He roams the world to no end and many decades pass. Eventually he gets tired and one day he even passes out from exhaustion, reverting to a dragon form to recuperate.

And you’re walking home from the mountains and you come across this huge dragon resting on a rock and you’re like oh my archon. But it looks like he’s sick so as you approach nervously and poke at his body gently with a stick (no response), and also press your ear against his scaly belly (he’s breathing and you can hear a heartbeat), you’re aware the dragon is still alive. You quickly rush home to grab some makeshift medicine made from herbs and return to the sick dragon

Zhongli too weary to open his eyes or lift his head, and as he drifts in and out of consciousness, he thinks he hears your voice and he’s comforted by the familiarity and as you sit with him, stroking his horns and mane, he kind of inches towards you and into your arms. As the day progresses, the sun is particularly harsh so you set up little parasols and pull huge leaves over his head to provide as much shade as possible. Occasionally the dragon has nightmares but you’re able to calm him down by petting him 

When it gets dark, you need to head home but you’re a little reluctant, so you leave behind some food for him and drape a blanket over his body (though this doesn’t cover him much). However, during the night, it’s thunder and lightning and you get worried for the dragon so you rush back out and you find the dragon being battered by the rain whilst curled up into a tight ball and shivering under the blanket so you quickly try to move him but oh lawd he heavy and suddenly the blanket gets blown away by the wind when he lifts a claw so you race after it and end up almost falling off a cliff - to your surprise, the dragon swoops down to save you and you faint but before you black out, you think you see a young man in the dragon’s place, staring at you with much intrigue

He has the same eyes as the dragon

That night, you have strange dreams of that man. He acts as if he knows you, calls you by a different name and you are also his lover. The dream is long, but ends with your demise - which forces you to wake up in a panic

You’re surrounded by the coiled up dragon who has gotten better from your care but when he wakes up, he’s cautious and observes you for a few moments. 

You and this dragon staring at each other until you slowly reach a hand to touch him 

Your hand lands over his snout and you’re surprised he’s allowing you to pat him, but whatever, you’re super happy at his recovery and you can go home now. It’s time to part ways and as you head towards the direction of your home, you throw glances over your shoulder to see the dragon watching you silently

On the way, you think about the dragon and the strange dreams and attract the attention of a group of treasure hoarders who are wandering around the wilderness. However, to your surprise, you are saved by a young man - and it’s the very man from your dreams! He manages to defeat the bandits but you see he’s hurt and he almost collapses if you weren’t there to catch him. The moment he landed in your arms and that same sense of familiarity swept over you. You’re quick enough to react and sweep those thoughts away and bring the poor man home, lugging his polearm over your back along with your basket

You look after this young man and nurse him back to health. During this time, he looks at you strangely and when he’s sleeping, his calls out the name you were called in the dream. When you think he’s having a nightmare and you go over to check if he’s ok, giving him a little shake on the arm, he throws his arms around you and holds you close, begging you not to leave him and that he had spent eons looking for you. When you tell him he’s got the wrong person…it’s as though he comes to his senses and he quickly releases you, apologising for his behaviour and thanking you for his hospitality

He tells you his name is Zhongli and because he’s injured, you give him the spare room in the back and take care of him. During this period of interaction, at first it’s quite strange and maybe a little awkward, because hell he is an insanely attractive man (he can’t be single, no way) and you’re bustling around the house, doing chores/cleaning up or tending to your garden and he watches you the entire time and this goes on for a few days before he joins in to help when you’re hanging up the laundry though you don’t want him to help because he’s injured but he assures you he wants to do his part. 

So Zhongli becomes a part of your everyday life where during the day and you both have breakfast together before you head to the market together to buy groceries and later, he accompanies you to pick herbs in the mountain. 

One day you’re tired so he sits with you and massages your leg and you’re so embarrassed but at the same time, your heart is beating like crazy. He even carries you down the steep path all the way home. 

At night time and you sit together on the front porch watching fireflies and chatting idly for hours. 

He ends up staying for a long time and one day, when it’s time to redress his wound, you notice he’s completely healed - and it looks like he actually healed up a while ago. You blink in confusion before turning to him and he looks at you before he reaches for your hand and holds it firmly, smoothing his thumb over the back of your hand

A distant memory, more like deja vu, flickers through your mind and you realise Zhongli has held your hand like this before and you run out of the room, confused. Zhongli worried he scared you off so he doesn’t pursue you

When it’s night, you dream again but it’s becoming so vivid you end up confused the next morning, waking up in an unfamiliar house and in an unfamiliar body and screaming for Zhongli. As you calm down, he holds you in his arms and it reminds you of the dream you had when you died in his embrace. You briefly forget yourself for a moment before murmuring Zhongli’s name - and it reminds him of how you used to say his name eons ago and he gets sentimental, giving in because he knows you are the reincarnation of his lover and when you kiss, that’s when everything floods back and you remember everything 

Finally reunited with your lover, you share an embrace, determined not to be separated ever again

[autisticandroids]

What bothers you about engaging with Claire? you don’t have to reply if you’re not comfortable or just don’t want to though im just nosy

i mean i really don't like her relationship with cas i feel like it's unearned. i feel like it's really important to distinguish moral culpability and like. emotional reactions that make sense.

like i think that cas can't meaningfully be blamed for what he did to claire. what he did to her is a tragedy but it's not really his crime anymore, he's changed. like cas is no longer the person who would do that to her. he is, imo, as absolved of moral culpability for that as he could reasonably be.

but that doesn't mean that it makes sense for claire to be able to. build a relationship with him. like first of all, we the audience know he's changed, but she doesn't. it should have taken a lot more to prove that to her. it's something that he should have had to really work for. like cas needs to earn like. claire not hating him with every fiber of her being. and he doesn't. like i like the idea of her forgiving him to give herself peace. but it needs to feel earned.

(see this post for my thoughts on a way to earn it, but like. that's just one possibility and i am very interested in exploring others.)

but the second part is like. even after she forgives him. and is no longer angry. he still caused her a trauma that she can never get over. so like. even though she doesn't hate him, even though she doesn't blame him, i feel like them having a continuing relationship is... that seems not right, to me. i don't think claire wants to see her dad's face walking around with someone else inside it, even if intellectually she knows it's not his fault and he would change it if he could. like i think them having a continuing relationship is like. if they were going to do that. it would have to be given a huge amount of time because it would be complicated and horrifying. certainly it could never be paternal that's too gross. but i think it would be easier for everyone involved if they never spoke again. like i think he has a certain obligation to make sure that she's materially cared for but that doesn't mean they have to be friends. like i think it would be really interesting if they were but it would take work, and a deft touch on the writers' part.

also, here are some posts that i think about re: claire and cas. i don't necessarily agree with them, even the ones i made, since my idea of claire has changed since then (mostly bc i watched season ten). but they're all... interesting to me. this is my favorite post about claire on the whole webbed site.

okay. now that we've described sort of... my ideal emotional arc for claire and cas, let me discuss some things that really, really bother me in the cas-claire stuff in season ten. the first thing is that i find it deeply, deeply gross that cas immediately tries to assume a parental role with claire. that's something that he has not earned, and which would just retraumatize her. it's gross. he owes her a great debt, but "parenting" is not even vaguely on the list of things he owes her, and it's horrifying.

the second thing is that i think her interactions with him are like. intended to read as sweet. but that's not how they read. the fact that her emotional reaction to him is so disjointed and weird compared to what it should be, the fact that she's in such desperate straits, the fact that she is very clearly used to depending on shady older men for help, plus the fact that he so obviously desperately craves absolution and validation from her, and the fact that, being cas, he's so gullible, well. it adds up to a picture. it reads like cas is another older man who she is trying to provide with what he wants from her because she's afraid (of the world but also of him) and powerless and she needs help and she doesn't know how to get it besides being pretend nice to skeevy dudes so they'll buy her a meal. like it reads as an interaction that stems from a really, really upsetting power dynamic. and like. sure cas means nothing but well. but he's both too socially unaware and too wrapped up in his own narcissistic guilt to see that he's one more traumatizing presence in the life of a normal human teenage girl, who she feels compelled to play nice with because she needs his help and is afraid of him.

also if you're interested in better ways for cas to engage with claire, i really like this fic.

[rogueonestan]

ch 18 -“‘til our paths cross.”

pairing: the mandalorian (din djarin) x f!reader / ofc

word count: 8.3k

summary: after learning the one thing you have kept as a secret, din reflects on the time he has spent with you. in doing so, he comes to a conclusion that will forever change your paths.

a/n: hi im back with another update a month later. i tried uploading this last week but tumblr was acting funny so i wanted to wait a little bit until i tried posting it again. hope you enjoy!

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The dead silence in the Crest isn’t enough to put a stop to the thoughts that are currently going through Din’s mind. 

He almost forgot how much he can no longer stand the silence. It’s something he got used to for such a long time. Nearly every night was filled with dead silence, but now not a day has passed without any noise thanks to you and the kid- not that he’s complaining. If only that were the case right now.

Even when his head is spinning with thought after thought, the only thing Din can focus on at the moment is the humming of hyperspace. He thought that being alone is exactly what he needed, but it isn’t helping the slightest. Usually being alone helped Din sort through his thoughts in the past, distracting himself by getting away from everything, but not this time. 

It reminds him of a time when his afternoons were spent like this. He’s gotten so used to his days being filled with noise that he forgot what it was like to be in complete silence, and it’s something he hasn’t missed in the slightest. This should be the perfect place for Din to clear his head, but it isn’t. As hard as he tries, he can’t seem to process everything that has happened in the past day or so. When you returned back to the Crest after everything that happened on Nevarro, Din’s first instinct was to be alone with his thoughts, thanks to his old habits. He can’t focus on what he’s thinking longer than for a minute- so much is on his mind as the ship is in transit. Everything had changed just by one afternoon spent in the cantina that the two of you had grown so familiar with. One moment you’re trying to lure an ex-Imperial officer to his death and the next, you’re trying to survive a shootout. 

Then the next thing Din knows, he finds out that you’re considered to be an enemy. A Jedi. 

He doesn’t even know what it means to be a Jedi, or even what a Jedi is, but based on what the Armorer told him, it sounded like they’re the enemy of his people. 

He feels as conflicted now as he did then. 

Even though you don’t consider yourself to be a Jedi anymore, you still knew about the strange abilities the kid has and didn’t mention anything to him about it. You even recognized what species the child was when you found him and still didn’t mention anything. 

The more he thinks about it, the more questions he has. 

Why didn’t you ever mention anything about the Jedi? Did you not trust him enough? Or was it something you weren’t proud of? 

You were never one to shy away from reminiscing about your past. You’ve told Din plenty of tales from your childhood, and even when the galaxy was at war, but never your time with the Jedi. Something must have happened with your time with them. 

Maybe that’s something he can ask you about once the Crest jumps out of hyperspace. 

Glancing behind him, Din follows the source of the only sound in the cockpit. The child is still fast asleep in his makeshift bed, unbothered by his surroundings. The long day all three of you had obviously got to him as well. A sigh leaves Din’s modulator as he continues to glance at the sleeping child in front of him. Usually this would help him ease his nerves, but nothing seems to be helping with the thoughts gnawing at his brain. 

Why didn’t you say anything to him? 

Din’s told you things that he hasn’t told anyone in years, hell, he doesn’t think he’s ever told anyone the things that he has shared with you, but you haven’t shown him the same courtesy. There have been so many opportunities for you to do so, but you never spoke up. There have been so many times that you could have explained things, made it easier for Din to understand the strange child, but you didn’t. You only kept your mouth shut when Din was confused about what was going on with the kid.

Though he understands why you never mentioned your history with the Jedi, afraid you would be putting yourself in harm’s way if you did, it still doesn’t help with the tight knot in his stomach. It would have been a difficult conversation to have, sure, but you still would have shown the full trust you have in him by telling him the entire truth- not hiding it until you were forced to explain yourself. 

Shaking his head, he immediately disregards the thought. He can’t blame you for a decision that clearly has haunted you on a daily basis. 

There’s a reason why you never told him before and you told him why when the two of you were in the hull just a few hours ago. You were afraid.

You were afraid that if you told him about who you were, you were going to be either killed or turned in as a bounty. 

Being on the run simply because you were raised by the Jedi was all you knew for years, and Din can’t blame you for that. He doesn’t know how long you were with the Jedi or when you began distancing yourself from their ways, all he knows is that you did it to protect yourself. if you hadn’t, then your paths wouldn’t have crossed.

It’s not an easy thing to digest, but Din knows the decision to hide this from him must have not been easy. It’s not easy to open yourself up to someone you’ve only known for a short period of time, especially when you have been stabbed in the back on multiple occasions in the past. Din knows that feeling all too well. There have been things Din hasn’t told you, or spared you the details of, because he wanted you to protect you. Though the details were minor like playing off an injury he got from a fight or something bad that happened that day- he understands why maybe you never revealed your past to him. 

There must have been a good reason for it. You wouldn’t have made that choice with a blink of an eye. It would have been one of the most difficult decisions you’ve ever made. You’ve always been so open with him about everything. It hurts for Din to think about why you never told him about it before, but he tries to not think about it too hard. 

Maybe that’s just how you were raised. Keeping certain truths away from others to protect them. You never judged Din for the customs he grew up with the Mandalorians, so he can’t judge you too harshly on the customs the Jedi raised you with. He may not know exactly what they are, but he can’t judge you too much until he learns more about them. You’ve shown him that same courtesy, always asking questions about the Mandalorians and their traditions without any judgement, even when you knew about the history your two people have with one another. The least he can do is show you the same courtesy. 

The Mandalorians always told him to be wary of who to trust. If you trust everyone that comes in your path, then you’re bound to have others taking advantage of your naivety. Perhaps you were raised with similar principles. 

The Jedi can seem like mysterious people to outsiders. The outside world knows hardly anything about them, even when they were highly renowned during the Clone Wars. All people knew during that time is that they had weird powers that wielded laser swords. No one really knew what their beliefs were or what their Code was. All most people knew is that they would try their best to help others by siding with the Republic. 

Without knowing, the many things Din admires about you is because you were raised by. Throughout your journey together, you’ve shown him your true colors. You’ve tried your hardest to let that part of your life go, but the teachings of those who raised you have been engraved in your mind. You’ve shown this to your partner by your willingness to help the defenseless on multiple occasions.

The first time Din was able to see this side of you was when you received the bounty puck to retrieve the child. It seems like such a long time since that day. Before arriving on Arvala-7, you always kept your mouth shut when it came to a job you disagreed with. You always told Din how you felt about a job, but this was the first time you told him how you really felt. You refused to bring an innocent child into the hands of the Empire. He was only a child.  The kid would be defenseless and you knew that you had the power to do something about it. You couldn’t just step aside and let the Imperials do whatever they pleased- you had to stop them. 

You always put the kid’s well-being before your own while he was in your care. You put yourself in danger during the short fight with the Trandoshans to make sure the child remained safe, and kept an eye on him when the three of you were returning back to Nevarro to hand him over to the men who hired you. During the ride back, Din made sure you were safe as well. 

The relationship between the two of you changed during this trip. He was able to see how caring you were towards strangers you just met, something he hadn’t seen in you before. You ensured other people’s safety before your own. 

Before you took this job, you always showed a tough exterior to the outside world, but you showed Din the real you. You showed kindness and empathy towards others. You were finally beginning to grow comfortable with his company, which is something not many can say. Something about the kid changed something deep within you, and Din cannot be more grateful.

If it weren’t for you and your kind nature, he wouldn’t have been able to tell you the things that he has over the past several months. When your walls came down, his came down as well. He shared a few things with you at this point, but your relationship only began to grow since that day. Your compassion let him see you, not his bounty hunter partner, but you. You had qualities he hadn’t seen in another person in a long time- he almost forgot what it was like for someone to do something out of the kindness of their heart, not because they felt obligated to. 

And that’s what Din admires about you. When you know something is wrong, you aren’t afraid to say so. You were wary from the start, saying how you weren’t sure if you should even go through with this job in the first place, but went through with it anyway because Din told you to. You put your own personal beliefs to the side for the job’s sake. When you found out that the bounty you tracked was a kid, you weren’t afraid to voice your concerns. There have been times where you felt uncomfortable with a few jobs you were tasked with, but you never accepted a job where it was an innocent child. 

You couldn’t find it within you to go through with it. If you did, then would there be a limit to what the two of you would or wouldn’t do? You had to put your own emotions to the side during your hunts, but you showed Din that you had a heart, a conscience, during this adventure. Not many hunters showed this part of themselves in the Guild. Din got used to seeing blank stares in the cantina back on Nevarro, but seeing the intimate interaction between you and the kid showed him just how different you are from the other hunters. Almost none of them would have been able to express themselves the same way you did that afternoon.

Without realizing it, that afternoon changed everything for Din. Everyone he knew had such difficulty connecting with others, but you were able to do it with such ease with the kid. It took a long time for you to be like that with Din, but you were able to eventually tell him stories from your past. The relationship you had was slowly growing from strictly professional to friendly by the occasional banter you would have. If it weren’t for the kid entering your lives, then your relationship wouldn’t have grown into what it is today. Neither of the walls you or Din put up wouldn’t have been able to come down.

Not once did you ever grow irritated by the little information Din shared with you about the Mandalorians when you asked about them. Before meeting, you knew very little about his people, but with time, you consider yourself lucky to learn more about them each day that passed by. By this, you asked the questions that came across your mind rather than making an assumption. He would give you vague answers at first, not wanting to reveal too much just in case you parted ways, but with time and patience, you were able to learn more about them than you ever imagined, even more so when you decided to stay by his side when he decided to rescue the child from the Imperial safehouse.

“I’m with you until the very end,”  You told him that day. Those words haven’t left his mind since that afternoon. Even when you hardly knew a thing about him, you still showed him where your true loyalty stands: with him- not the Guild, but him. It’s something he hasn’t been able to forget. 

One of the most important things to the Mandalorians is sticking with those you care for and keeping your word, and you showed that to Din when you supported him with one of the most difficult decisions he’s ever made. Not many would have made the decision you did. Many would have left his side, or even tip off other hunters, but not you. You always were different from other hunters. That day, Din was able to see who you really were. Not only were you kind and patient towards a child when you thought your partner wasn’t paying attention, but you also showed one of the most important virtues regarded to his people: undying loyalty. It’s one thing to say you will never leave someone’s side, but it’s another to actually stay true to your word. You never once made Din question where your loyalty is, and that’s something he can’t take lightly. 

What he didn’t realize until recently is the purpose he has. Things can easily get messy and complicated in this galaxy. When you both agreed to have a shared partnership, Din knew that you would be under his protection and he would do anything to make sure nothing bad happened to you, but what he didn’t realize was just how important your safety is to him until a few weeks ago. When deciding to take the kid in, he saw how he can use his training for good instead of bad. Instead of taking a life, he now can ensure the safety of two. Now, he’s not some hunter- he’s a protector of now two lives, and he’s been able to prove that by the several dangerous situations the three of you have been in together. From a cantina brawl on a random planet to that pazaak situation you accidentally put yourself in, to the weeks you spent on Sorgan, Din’s been able to keep the three of you safe even when a great danger exposes itself. 

The threat on Sorgan didn’t seem that bad at first, only a group of outsiders stirring up trouble with the local village, but things only escalated the longer you were there. The real threat exposed itself when inspecting the nearby area. The outsiders not only were greater in size, but they also had an AT-ST in their possession. The odds didn’t seem to be in your favor at that point, but with great determination and training, you were able to help the local village fight off the attackers. Din was hesitant to help at first, thinking that the odds were too great, but you disagreed. You believed that with the villagers’ support, you would be able to help them with their raider problem. Instead of worrying if they would survive the next harvest, they would be able to work in peace. And you were right- with hard work and perseverance, the attacks were finally put to an end with one final confrontation. 

After that night, the majority of the time you spent in the village was almost pure bliss. If you hadn’t been so persistent in helping them, then none of that would have happened. Din wouldn’t have been able to see the kind of life that he’s always thought of. Most of his life has been spent in hiding, whether it was literally hiding in the Mandalorian covert for so many years or it was hiding himself from the galaxy, Din never knew what it would be like to stay in a place that reminded him so much of home village before it was taken away from him. It wasn’t something he thought he wanted until he saw it right in front of his eyes. 

He never saw the true beauty of a community until the three of you became a part of one- for the time being at least. He never spent as much time with the villagers as you had, but he saw the charm in it. The villagers never hesitated to ask for help from himself or you, but seemed much more comfortable asking you. When they did, you always agreed with a giant smile on your face. It was something Din hadn’t seen before. You were always willing to help others when they needed it, but he’s never seen you this carefree before. 

Nobody had to worry about the dangers the next day would bring. The problems here on Sorgan almost seem minuscule compared to the ones you had when you went rogue from the Guild. You were preoccupied with your worries before arriving on the peaceful planet that you forgot what it was like to not worry about a thing. Instead of chatting about your worries, you were finally able to pass the time by the conversations you two would have throughout the day. One morning, in particular, pops up in his mind- the final day you spent at the village before you were forced to leave. 

That morning, Din told you things he hadn’t told anyone for as long as he can remember. He told you what his childhood was like, how similar his village was to the one you were currently staying at. He hadn’t felt this peaceful since he was a boy. 

It was something he missed greatly. He’s missed the feeling of connecting with another person- he never let himself grow too close with someone ever since he lost his parents. Losing them was bad enough, he wouldn’t be able to handle the heartache of losing someone else he cares deeply for. The only person he’s allowed himself to grow close with is you. 

He’s missed the feeling of not doing much during the day. Most of his days were spent completing task after task, never having a moment to enjoy the little things. To the average person, seeing a town go on with their daily lives may not seem that spectacular, but it brought comfort to Din. His days were always filled with adventure, never knowing what the next day might bring, but seeing the everyday lives of the villagers brought a fire in his belly as warm as your hand had felt that morning. It’s a feeling he hasn’t been able to forget. 

It’s been such a long time since he’s had such an intimate moment with another person that he can remember almost everything about that moment. He can remember how fast his heart was racing when your fingers intertwined with his, how the weight resting in his hand replaced the weight he felt on his chest, or the feeling he got in his stomach when his eyes locked with yours when you were silently listening to him. No matter how hard he tries, that moment isn’t able to leave his brain. It’s the only thing that has been playing on repeat late at night. 

It was a simple gesture from you, a silent sign of support as he continued to tell you the fate of his parents. It was difficult for him to do, the words barely left his mouth as he described the destruction of his home, but you were patient with him, as you always have been. You never interrupted him or grew restless with how long it took him. If it took him a millennium to say something, even if it was just one detail, you would be more than willing to wait for what he has to say. 

And that’s another thing that he admires about you. Not only have you been nothing but patient when it comes to him opening up to you, but you also have such a gift when it comes to connecting with others. After describing such an awful memory, you were sympathetic towards him by revealing the similar fate your parents suffered as well. It wasn’t easy, but you did it so that he wouldn’t feel as alone. 

You both had similar upbringings and were adopted into different cultures, but those who raised you shaped into who you are today.  For Din, he closed himself off from others so that he wouldn’t have to experience losing anyone else, but you were the complete opposite. Instead of closing yourself off from the galaxy, you never let your past experience of losing someone stop you from forming relationships with others. A wall was always put up from being vulnerable with almost anyone you met, but you let it down when you finally met someone you trusted completely, like Din. It took a while for you to get to this point with him, but he’s the first person you’ve been completely raw with since the fall of your people. 

That same wall lowered the same day you arrived at the village. Something about the locals made you immediately trust them, Din noticed. It’s something he hadn’t seen in you before. Thanks to that feeling, you were able to help them with their problem. Instead of backing down when things got tough, you never took ‘no’ for an answer when it came to helping them. Despite all of the trouble you’ve had in the past, of others using your good nature against you, you never lost faith in the village, believing that with their help, the raidings would be put to an end. You were right. With their help, all of their problems stopped. 

That’s something that Din still struggles with- seeing the good in every situation. As much as he tries to, his pessimistic side always gets the best of him. He thought that the odds were too great to provoke the intruders, but he was wrong. If it weren’t for you, then who knows what would’ve been the fate of the village. Ever since that day, he tries to see the light of every situation, but that gets hard at times. There were many times when Din doubted the battle would be won in your favor, but thanks to your selfless act to protect the villagers, everything turned out alright in the end. 

From that battle to the last morning you spent there on Sorgan, Din hasn’t been able to forget about the time you spent together. As much as he tries to, he can’t stop replaying the simple gesture of both of your hands touching for the first time. It wasn’t even an extraordinary moment at the time, just a small sign to show your patience with him, but for some reason, the moment hasn’t been able to leave his mind. Even when his mind is filled with so many thoughts late at night, he gets the same feeling in his stomach as he did when you put your hand in his. 

Hand holding is still as tender now as it was then, even with the multiple times you’ve done it at this point. It’s a sign of showing support towards each other, but that morning was the first time your skin grazed him on purpose. Maybe he’s looking way into it, but when your hand touched his that morning, he got a feeling in his stomach that he hadn’t felt in a very long time. The last time he can even think of feeling remotely similar to this was when Xi’an was in his life, but even she couldn’t make him feel the way he feels towards you. He felt it during your last day on Sorgan and he felt it again when you traveled to your destination on an isolated planet where there was nothing but flowers in sight. 

The warm feeling in his stomach returned when he heard laughter coming from inside the hull after landing on the foreign planet. He didn’t know what the cause of your laughter was, but he didn’t care during the moment. All he cared about was knowing you were happy and safe. He knew that all three of you would be safe here for the time being. He wouldn’t have to worry about what would happen if he left you alone on the ship. Instead of his afternoon being spent worrying about what he would have to do to make sure you’re all safe, he can finally rest. His days can be like what they were when you were on Sorgan. The day can be spent doing whatever you want, not putting yourselves in danger just so you can survive to see nightfall. 

It’s something Din hadn’t allowed himself to feel in a very long time- to be at ease. He didn’t even let himself be completely vulnerable during the weeks you spent at the village. He was afraid that the moment he let his guard down, there would be something to interrupt what he was feeling, and in a way, he was right. The morning he let his guard down was the same morning that the bounty hunter was able to track you down and almost kill the kid. 

It was just bad luck. Word eventually got around about the fight that took place and that’s how you were eventually found. Thankfully, that didn’t happen on the planet you were laying low momentially. Din had hoped that you could’ve stayed here longer, enjoying the peace that seemed to linger in the air, but the decisions he made in the past decided to catch up to him. Instead of laying low on this peaceful planet for a few weeks, you were only able to stay here for a day or two, but the time you spent here hasn’t been able to leave Din’s mind.

He found an abandoned planet when trying to find a safe place where the three of you could lay low for a while. With a low population density, the chances of someone spotting you were slim to none. You wouldn’t be able to stay here longer than a few weeks with the supplies you have, but staying here meant that you would be out of danger, and that’s all Din cared about. If keeping your head low on an abandoned planet meant that you wouldn’t be in any kind of danger, then he would be more than willing to hide away from the galaxy with you. With the great amount of danger you both have been in lately, Din’s more than willing to stay here.

When first stepping foot on this planet, the sound of local wildlife greeted Din. Birds were chirping, tiny animals were chatting, and even the simple sound of the tree branches swaying back and forth brought a sense of comfort in his bones. The planet didn’t offer much, only the beauty of its atmosphere, but you didn’t need much to be safe. All you needed was a secluded area and enough food and water to last you for a while, and that was enough for Din. If your afternoons were spent with each other’s company, that’s more than what he could ask for. 

Din was quick to make sure the area was safe shortly after the Crest landed. When he was doing so, he had the company of your laughter coming from the hull of the ship. The sound was so distant at first. If things weren’t so quiet outside, he wouldn’t have been able to hear it, but he’s so glad that he did. It’s a sound he hadn’t heard in a while- a sound he didn’t know he missed. He heard it almost everyday when you were at the village on Sorgan, but ever since you were on the run again, the sound became rare. 

Hearing your laughter in the past always brought Din joy, knowing that you’re enjoying yourself for the time being, but hearing it this time brought a different feeling inside his chest. To this day, he still doesn’t know exactly what that feeling is. Knowing that you’re happy even after being in danger just a few days prior made Din happy too, but the feeling in his stomach is foreign. He hasn’t had this kind of a reaction to something before. The only time he’s had a feeling in his gut is when his stress is beginning to get to him or when he knows he’s in danger, never to a sound as delightful as your laughter. 

Then the feeling only got stronger when he saw your reaction to where you would be staying for the next leg of your journey. The kid was giggling as he was running through the nearby flower field, but the only thing that captured Din’s attention was how soft your features were in the moment. From the way the eyes were in awe from your surroundings to the gigantic grin plastered across your face, the only thing Din could focus on is you. You somehow were able to put him under some kind of spell without trying to. 

The feeling he had in his stomach spread throughout his entire body. It’s weird to explain, but somehow it spread from his stomach to his chest to his bones. He doesn’t know how to explain what it is but it’s something he never wants to go away. It’s something he hasn’t felt in a long time, knowing that he was the reason behind your happiness made the feeling even stronger. No one’s been able to have this effect on him before, except you. Without even trying, you managed to capture a part of him he didn’t even know he gave to you. He’s kept his heart locked up for so long that he forgot what it felt like to give it to any person. 

He never has to worry about whether or not you’ll judge him harshly for something he’s done in the past. He knows that you’ll have an open mind about things and only have an opinion on it once you’ve asked questions about it.

There hasn’t been a single time where he’s felt judgment coming from you. You haven’t agreed with everything he’s done, but you respect the decisions he’s made, and that’s something he doesn’t take for granted. It’s rare for someone to be as patient and open-minded as you are, most people form an opinion far before they know every single detail, but not you. The only time you’ve only criticized a decision he’s made is when you don’t agree with it. After being partners for so long, there have been a handful of times where you don’t agree with a plan of his, but you still support him because of the amount of trust you have in him. If he said nothing bad would happen, you would take his word for it. It’s a sign of trust you’ve shown towards him and that’s something he can’t take lightly. 

Loyalty and family are the two most important things to his people. Having undying loyalty to those closest to you shows just how much you trust the other person. It’s something he’s only seen in the covert. Putting your complete trust in someone, knowing they will put your best interest in heart, is something he’s only seen Mandalorians show towards other Mandalorians. They put their full trust in each other because they’re like family, and family will do anything to make sure the rest are safe, like you. Din admitted this shyly one afternoon, afraid of what your reaction would be when he admitted he saw you as a part of his family, but seeing the look on your face told him you felt the same as well. Your people may not have as strong a belief in family as his people do, but you know the importance of him referring to you as family meant to him. 

He was so nervous during the moment that he didn’t even notice how his stomach turned into knots when your hand touched his after he admitted this. A weight was taken off of his shoulders after telling you this- he didn’t even notice his body physically reacted to you touching him. 

He got that same feeling again when seeing your reaction to the planet the Crest landed on. You had such a childlike wonder to it that the radiance beaming from you was contagious. Like you, the biggest smile was on Din’s face when he glanced around his surroundings before heading back to his task. The moment between the two of you didn’t last long, as the little one began running off towards the nearby trees, but Din hasn’t been able to get this memory out of his head. He doesn’t even know why. 

Even when you were gone, his thoughts weren’t able to escape you. He couldn’t stop thinking about how happy you seemed here even when you just got here, or how the sun bouncing off of your skin seemed to give you such a glow- not from the sun itself, but from within. Your warm nature being prevalent on the inside and outside. Everything about you was able to easily rub off of Din. 

He doesn’t even know how mind came across the things that it did. One moment he’s thinking about what the three of you could do on the planet to pass the time and the next is what your future together would be like. The future together is something he’s thought about a lot recently since the child came into your lives- he always thought about what life would be like once you found a safe place for the baby, but thoughts like these never came across his mind until that sunny afternoon. 

Rather than wondering what the two of you would do in the future, like if you would ever return back to Nevarro someday or if you would continue traveling the galaxy together, thoughts about settling down came across his mind. He doesn’t even know how that thought popped up. The two of you never discussed settling down together, you’ve both expressed wanting to have a peaceful life someday but never together, so he doesn’t know where this idea came from. It’s probably the atmosphere of this place, he told himself. 

Neither of you ever talked about what exactly your relationship is. He knows this partnership you have goes way beyond what you both agreed to, more than just collecting bounties together, it’s a bond neither of you has felt in a very long time, but the unclear relationship you have doesn’t exactly help Din figure out what he felt during the moment. Why is he only able to think about you? Even when he’s trying to figure his future, whether that would include just himself or with someone else, the only thing he’s able to think about is you- how much things have blossomed between the two of you ever since leaving the peaceful village. Never in a million light-years did Din think he would be able to feel towards another person with how he feels towards you. It’s a foreign feeling, something that he has to figure out one day.

The only thing he knows for sure is that he trusts you more than anyone else in the entire galaxy. If there was something you were uncertain about, he would gladly hear you. If you decided against a decision of his, he would try to figure out another way. 

After everything you have been through together, the only thing he knows for a fact is that he doesn’t want a future without you. It’s hard to imagine a life without you, whether that meant continuing the lifestyle you’ve shared for the past year or if that meant a more domestic one. 

There’s so much he’s told you about himself that he hasn’t dared to share with another soul, whether it was the simple reveal of his name, or where he came from, or even what life was like when the Mandalorians took him in, he’s never told anyone the things he’s told you without thinking twice about it. He hasn’t trusted someone this much-  the last person he can think of was before he was adopted into his creed. 

When he told you about the ideals he was raised with, you never made any judgements towards him. The only thing you told him was that he was more than the beskar armor he wears daily. Though he was adopted into Mandalorian customs, you always told him he’s more than what he was raised by- that he’s his own person. He’s gotten so used to others making critical judgements about him just because of who he was raised by that he was taken back to hear what you had to say. 

It’s not often he heard someone speak about his people in such a collected manner- most people were quick to judge their warrior ways that it was nice to hear such good things come from someone who isn’t accustomed to their ways. Hearing you talk about your loyalty to him, to Din, not to the Mandalorian warrior, was something he didn’t know he needed to hear. He grew used to people either admiring or condescending his warrior ways that he forgot at times what it meant to be his own person.

Thanks to you, he’s been able to see that part of himself again. He’s hidden it away not only from the galaxy but from himself as well, and you’ve been able to show him that he can be his own person beyond the armor he dons. There’s no doubt that his creed has shaped him into who he is today, but he’s also more than that. He’s someone with a heart, empathy towards others, putting others before himself- something he’s never thought of himself as until you pointed it out. You were able to see the best parts of him when he didn’t even see them.

When you were able to see the best parts of him, he saw the best parts in you when you returned with a simple gift when you were gone for a bit. Glancing back at the memory, the gesture wasn’t that big, just a bunch of flowers bundled up together, but to him, it meant so much to him. He can’t even remember the last time someone did this thoughtful for him, let alone giving him a gift. It’s been such a long time since he’s experienced this much joy from a single action. It probably didn’t seem that big of a deal to you at the time, just something to take his mind off of things for the moment, but he can remember everything about that moment- the warm feeling in his chest returning when he saw the bundle of flowers shaking slightly in your hands, the nervous expression on your face, the feeling of the sun beaming against the sliver of exposed skin at the nape of his neck. He wanted to remember every single detail of that moment, not wanting to forget what it felt like. He never wanted to forget what it felt like to be this happy, not having to worry about anything happening to the three of you. He just wanted to stay here.

He wanted to see more of this side of you. Seeing how happy and carefree you were here reminded him of the memories he has of his mother. When he was a boy, his mother and father used to do so much to express the love they had for one another, and a lot of the memories he has of them is the gifts they would give each other to show how much they loved each other. It’s something that his parents always made sure he was a part of- he would try to help them as much as he could to help pick out the gift. It was something he always looked forward to as a boy and it’s something he’s seen on multiple occasions during his trips throughout the galaxy. 

Gift exchanging is a common thing among married couples- like his parents, married couples want to express their love by giving their significant other something they know they’ll like, and Din can’t help but think of these things as he inspected the bundle of flowers you gave him that day. It wasn’t the most lavish gift, but it was more than he ever could ask for. It showed that, he too, was on your mind even when you were separated. You wanted to express how much you care for his well being by giving him something that you had access to, and with the current environment you’re staying in, you have very limited choice. He didn’t care what the gift was, all he cared about was the thought you put into it. 

The thoughtful gift is what reminds him of the qualities you have that his mother also had- your thoughtful nature, the way you put others first before yourself, offering to help others in any way you can. His well being was your first priority. You tried to ease his mind as much as you could, you tried to take some of the burden off of his shoulders by offering to repair his very torn cape that he dons. It was something that you didn’t even think twice about, just wanting to help him in any way that you can, but it’s something he hasn’t been able to forget. It’s just one of the many ways you’ve shown him how considerate and thoughtful you can be without even realizing it. 

~

There’s so much about that day that he hasn’t been able to forget, even when he’s alone in the cockpit as the Crest is in orbit of your next destination.

So much has happened within the last week of your lives. One day you’re able to find sanctuary on a nearly abandoned planet and then the next, he finds out about the one part of your life you never shared with him before. He can think about why you never spoke about this part of your life before but at the end of the day, it’s a decision that you didn’t take lightly. With how open your relationship has been lately, it’s hard to imagine just how difficult this decision must have been for you. Not only to keep this from him, knowing about the messy history both of your people have together, but to move on from who raised you. Even when the Empire was hunting his people, Din always had the support of those who took him in, but you didn’t. You had to survive on your own. If you hadn’t, then your paths wouldn’t have crossed. 

There must be a reason why your paths crossed. It’s the only reason he can think of- because the galaxy wouldn’t be so cruel as to force his path away from the one person he trusts the most, right?

It’s not an easy thing to digest- to find out the one person you trust the most was hiding something as big as this. A Jedi. He can’t get the Armorer’s words out of his head. Not only were the people who took you in considered to be enemies of his people, but you also knew more about the child than he did and still didn’t tell him. He can’t help but feel that you don’t trust him nearly as much as he trusts you. 

He disregards the thought, shaking his head. You didn’t have the same kind of support as he did when the Empire rose to power. He had others in his covert to rely on when things got tough, but the only person you had was yourself, something he knows all too well at this point. 

He closed himself off from others just so he wouldn’t have to feel the weight he feels in his chest. He understands why you made the decision that you did, but he can’t ignore the aching feeling he feels throughout his entire body by the thought of you not telling him sooner. You only revealed that part of your life to him because you were forced to. He told you things he hasn’t told anyone else since, well ever, not even someone in the covert. He had so much faith in you that he told you anything he could think of. It doesn’t feel fair to expose parts of himself to you just for you to keep something hidden. 

There have been a few times where you almost told him about who raised you, but out of fear, you backed down. He doesn’t know what things were like when your people fell, maybe that’s something the two of you can talk about once you land. He hardly knows a thing about your people, and like you, he can’t be one to form an opinion on a group of people he doesn’t know. You never cast judgment on who raised him. You always asked questions about his beliefs in a respectable manner, and he should have that same common courtesy.

He knows that he should see you as an ‘enemy sorcerer,’ something the Armorer referred to your people as, but he didn’t see that when he was looking at you as you were confessing where you really came from. It wasn’t an easy topic to talk about for you, that’s obvious by how your fingers fumbled with each other as you looked down at the floor in shame, but it’s something you confessed to him, even when you were scared. You didn’t know how he was going to react to the news, thinking he was going to leave you behind. For that, he can’t hold the decision you made against you. There have been so many decisions you both have disagreed on, and this is one of them. He would have preferred if you told him about this sooner, but he can’t hold this against you when it’s clearly haunted you at night. 

“What do you think, kid?” Din asks as he turns around in his seat, to find the child has just woken up from his overdue nap. With one swift movement, the child is secure in the crook of his arms in a matter of seconds. Even when his surroundings are as peaceful as they can get, his mind won’t stop turning a million miles a minute. 

“Why didn’t she tell me…” He mumbles out, mainly to himself. When he glances down at the child wrapped in his arms, the look in the child’s eyes is trying to tell him something that Din can’t seem to decipher. It’s like he’s trying to tell the masked man something important but can’t understand it. 

When a few moments of silence are passed in the hull, another question comes from Din’s mouth, one he almost doesn’t want to know the answer to. “Did you know?”

The only kind of coherent response the child gives is a series of giggles, not knowing the true connotation. Sighing, Din lets his head fall back as he lets his mind wander. 

“Regardless of what has changed your mind about her, I sense she will help you with your journey.”

Even when his mind is going almost nonstop, the words from the Armorer haven't been able to leave his mind- it always has a way of coming back to him. 

The emerging of your two paths had to happen for a reason. 

For whatever the reason may be, Din knows the only person who would be able to help him with his journey is you. He doesn’t know where to begin to even find the people who raised you- it would be damn near impossible if you weren’t by his side. Though you don’t see yourself as a Jedi any longer, you can still aid him in his journey of returning the child back to the Jedi. Maybe you could even help him understand more about the weird powers the child has, or even help the kid gain more control over them. After what he experienced in the cantina on Nevarro, Din finally sees just how powerful the little one really is. He can’t protect him without your help. It will be a long and difficult path, but it’s one he doesn’t want to do without you. 

“Alright kid, let’s go.”

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[mandalorewhore]

Common Ground

Part 2 of Hunter  (formerly Hunter and Prey)

gif by @themandaloriandaily​

Rating: Explicit Content Warnings: SMUT, Oral Sex (fem recieving), Cock Warming, Descriptions of violence/blood , Edging (maybe?), Dirty talk, Praise kink, Size kink, Big Dick Mando, Blindfolded Sex Words: 11.7k AO3 LINK

Summary: Reader and Mando land on Nevarro to meet with Karga

A/N: im sorry to niceguy!Karga in season 2

This would be less awkward if you knew how to talk to the man. 

The awkwardness is probably one-sided though you doubt he’s brooding over what the two of you did last night in this cockpit. You’re not a blushing virgin afraid to talk about sex, but it would be nice if you actually knew  something you both had in common, since you’re going to be spending a lot of time together. The extent of your conversations have been about sex, mechanics, and killing people. That’s pretty fitting for the two of you, you suppose. He is… Officially? your bounty hunting partner now.

However, he’s very comfortable in silence, so much so that it seems to be a central part of his character, much like the armor strapped to his body. Is being reserved a part of the Mandalorian creed too, or does he just prefer it? Does he want to talk about how you sucked his dick mere hours after abandoning your jobs as mercenaries? What is he thinking about right now? You could probably ask him all this, you know. Your internal argument is boiling over like a forgotten pot as you ruminate in the passenger seat of the Crest’s cockpit.

    You woke up in his arms a few hours ago, curled up in the pilot seat together, your face feeling a bit grimey due to  not scrubbing it clean after he gave you that facial. Feeling cozy in the quiet moments that follow waking, you snuggled in closer to his warmth, still only separated by the thin layer of his undershirt. You started when his palm squeezed your shoulder, his way of letting you know he was already awake. 

There’s an unspoken feeling about the way he fell asleep in your presence. You may work together now, but you’re still virtual strangers and Mando is a professional. You doubt he’ll pass out in front of you again. 

Slumped in your seat, you mull over every second that passed between the two of you. Meanwhile, he’s just sitting there like a lump of metal. Unaffected. Impassive. If you didn’t have first-hand proof of the deliciously warm skin he hides, you would’ve passed him off  as a droid. 

Actually when you think about it… when it comes to conversation topics, maybe metal is the place to start. As in, the ship that is now your impromptu home for the foreseeable future. You’ve gleaned that the Crest is like home to the Mandalorian and, come to think of it, he seemingly opted to sleep on his little cot down in the ship’s hull instead of taking up a bunk back on the space station. If he were anyone else, the gesture would’ve been ostentatious. It gave the impression that he was ready to leave at any moment. 

But no one wants to confront a Mandalorian.

Bringing up the Crest is probably a safe option and you’re knowledgeable about ships. You can hold your ground when it comes to the technicalities of mechanics. Plus, you can be charming when you want to be; on merc jobs you weren’t put into the femme fatal role for no reason.  Although you’ve casually lured men to their death, you’re more nervous to chat with Mando. But you’re determined to try. Try to be appealing...

    “I’m curious… Once I have some credits saved up, would you be interested in adding mods to the Razor Crest? I haven’t gotten a good look yet, but I’m floating some ideas around.” You bite your lip automatically out of apprehension, but hoping it comes across as playful. You’re not out of line or anything; it's been hours since you last exchanged any words so it's not like you’ve been chatting his ear off. Still, you worry that you sound extra loud to someone who’s spent so long in stillness. 

“That may be useful. What were you thinking?” Mando’s response comes only a second later, and even though he faces the cockpit’s transparisteel windows as he speaks, you’re giddy at his swiftness to respond. 

    “Well, I would love to touch her up a little. There are some issues with the hyper-drive and coms that could be fixed pretty easy. As for modifying, I saw that you installed a mobile carbonite-freezing chamber for bounties?” He nods to affirm your guess. “I could move that ‘round to utilize the space for storage and better suit two people living here. Either install a bed that can swing down or-”

    “Separate beds are unnecessary. We can sleep in shifts or share the bunk.”

    “O-oh. Sound’s good.” You gulp, feeling a little warm. The implication makes you sweat even if he shot down your idea. “Well, upgrading the deflector shields would be a good idea. Protect her better, plus efficient heat dispersal during atmospheric flight would let us jump into hyperspace faster. If we need to run or just want to fuck off somewhere.”

    “Hm. That is a good idea. She’s fast but there's always room for improvement.” He accentuates his response by patting the console lightly, and something about the way his hand lingers gently on the surface reminds you of a parent touseling their child’s hair. A smile stretches across your face, finally relaxing a little after being so tense all morning. For someone that you thought was so serious, he sometimes reveals a sentimental side to his personality. It makes you want to ask him more, to know more about him and how he thinks, but you’re so nervous about asking him anything even slightly personal, anything that has to do with his preferences or opinions. Your short exchange about his ship went pretty smoothly you think, maybe you can ask him more, you’ll just stay on the topic of starships. That should be fine. 

    “Do you have a dream ship?” You blurt, sounding a little less casual than you were trying for. Oops. 

    He takes longer to respond this time, seemingly thinking the question over. “No. Maybe when I was younger. I have the Crest now, there isn’t a need to plan for another ship.” 

    There's that seriousness again, the way he responds to you makes you think that he has never had to answer hypothetical questions before. It makes perfect sense, the average person doesn’t go around asking tall, intimidating Mandolorians about their hobbies. What a Gonk Droid. I’m jealous he can get away with talking like that. Still, you do want to continue this conversation if only to hear his voice. “Nothin’ about planning Mando, just a little make-believe. Personally, I like an A-Wing, the RZ-1 variant is classic even if the 2 is flashier. X-Wings are neat too, minus the pigs flying them.” 

    A weird huff passes through his voice filter and he finally turns to face you. You’re caught off guard by the sudden eye-visor contact, so it’s a second later when you process what that noise was, and the realization makes you positively giddy. “Oh shit, did I make a Mandolorian laugh? Am I on Spice?” 

    “That’s funny- pigs don’t deserve the nice Starfighters.” He laughs again, clearer this time while warmth feelings bloom within you at his reaction. It’s so unbelievable to you that he’s here laughing at something you said. You never once heard a reaction like that from him before now. “Those fast ships are impressive and great for combat, but I need a bigger space… a YV-929 would suit my needs.”

    “Of course it would, there’s like 1000 guns on that blocky thing. Plus the Empire banned it and you like to break rules.” The ship he named is virtually the same build as the Razor Crest, just with more guns, which is amusing to you. 

Creature of habit, you think, finding yourself leaning subtly closer to his body with every exchange. You don’t think you’re imagining him doing the same.

    “16. Could add more though.” He murmurs and something in his voice makes you think that he isn’t being entirely humorous. 

Maker, he is probably mapping out all the baster mods he could stick on that bulky freighter. You’re still amused by his very literal sense of things. You settle back in your seat to observe the hyperspace light streaking across the cockpit, a comfortable silence falling over the cockpit.

As you sit there and ruminate, the topic of weapons brings forth a vague memory in your mind. 

Someone once told you that Mandalorians aren’t considered great fighters due only to reputation and rumor. Most people are aware that armor and weaponry is part of the Mandalorian culture, but fewer are aware that such items have religious significance, going much deeper than a learned skill. Mandalorians are revered as great warriors not just because of their physical training, but because fighting and waging battle is a form of prayer. 

Despite finding rumors about Mandalorians to be generally exaggerated, you feel this one may be true.

 You’re curious but afraid to ask him to elaborate. The fact that neither of you exchanged more than a few words when you worked together is proof of his preferred privacy. Even though you’re pretty sure he wouldn’t mind giving you some sort of explanation about his culture, you decide to avoid any personal questions. 

Plus you really don’t want to come across as asking about his helmet.

    You break the silence shyly, trying to smoothly bring up a different topic. “Down in the hull… I haven’t explored much of your ship, I don’t want to come across as snooping. But I’m wondering, what sort of manpower have you got stored here?” 

“I installed an armory. Do you want to see it?” 

Fuck yes you want to check it out, his personal collection must be a wet dream.

“Yes, I’d love to!” You reply excitedly. The weapons Mando carried were always fascinating. You especially admired that rifle he slung across his back. You’ve never seen it in action but you heard it evaporated its targets. The two spokes at the end made you wonder how it shot. There has to be different settings on the gun, it would be impractical to evaporate all your targets especially if you need to bring back bounties, dead or alive. The bullets he slung across his chest must be paired with the rifle based on their size and shape when you compare them to the rifle chamber. What sort of charge do they contain to completely disintegrate its victims?

You’re tapping your fingers on your bottom lip, calculating how the rifle might function when his leg brushes past you. Glancing up in surprise, you realize he’s already headed to the cockpit ladder, twisting his upper body as he turns his helmet to look back at you.

“Come on.” You’re unable to read his face but something in his body language makes you think he’s amused by you. Flushing red, you scramble upright from the leather seat to follow him down to his armory. He slides first down the ladder, not bothering to use the rungs. Being unfamiliar with the area you opt to carefully descend one portion at a time, unaware of the view you’re giving Mando. By the time you reach the bottom, he’s diverted his gaze. 

Tall body moving to a panel on the wall, he punches in a four-digit code, prompting a smooth metal cabinet on the opposite wall to slide open with a hiss. You shake your head at this. The man has a tiny metal cot but he installed a hydraulic system for his weapons cabinet. But when you look closer at the exhibit your jaw falls open.

Oh my… Now that’s sexy.

The two side doors hang open to reveal a space in the middle filled with large blasters. His mid-sized guns are stacked horizontally above each other while the longer rifles lay vertically to the right of the center display. The doors contain smaller handguns of varying design and purpose. Each weapon is unique, there is not a single inch of wasted space given to any blaster if it doesn’t have distinct properties. Eyes locked on the arsenal, you scoot forward and make grabby hands at the cabinet. 

“Oo, they’re beautiful! Can I- May I see?” You are immediately drawn to a cylindrical pistol mounted at the very top of the stack, the gun’s sight a smooth metal and grip warm brown. Despite its deadly properties, it is a fucking gun, something about it looks soft to the touch. You’re finding more and more that you enjoy the juxtaposition of lethality and softness. 

Even though you’ve made no specification on which gun you want to hold, Mando reaches out and selects the very gun you’re attracted to and hands it to you. I should stare less, it's like he can read my mind. Despite resolving to do so the thought is fuzzy, unimportant when you’re so excited about handling one of the prettiest pistols you’ve ever seen. Mando watches you from a few feet away. 

“Good choice. I usually conceal-carry that blaster since it’s small on me, looks like the perfect size for you though.” Mando’s compliment has you grinning up at him, feeling giddy and full of light, but you’re quickly drawn back to look at the gun. Turning the weapon over in your hands you admire the polished metal, the texture making a satisfying noise as you run your fingers on its silky surface. The weight is perfectly balanced as you aim it at the wall, lining up the sight with a seam in the metal paneling. 

“You can carry it from now on.” 

What? It’s a good thing you know your trigger safety otherwise you would’ve pulled the trigger in shock, probably ricocheting the blast into your head. The giddy energy drains from you, replaced by apprehension and confusion. Why is he giving me so much shit? 

Of course you’re thankful. You’re incredibly thankful to be on the Razor Crest at all; however you can’t help feeling as if you owe Mando on a level where you’re incapable of repaying him. He didn’t have to take you with him when he dropped Ran’s crew, he didn’t have to indulge your sexual fantasies, he didn’t have to comfort you, didn’t have to partner with you, and he doesn’t need to give you this blaster. It is certainly a collectible, a rarity. A Mandalorian wouldn’t have it on hand if it were some run of the mill E-11 handed out to every Stormtrooper in the Empire. 

But what can you even say to him? It would be incredibly awkward if you refused him right now. Your mind races.

Best focus on the easy stuff. As long as he doesn’t drop me off on some wasteland I’ll be fine. That blaster is too pretty to decline so with your willfulness broken by aesthetic pleasure, you holster the gun on your hip, opposite the blaster you already carry. 

“Thank you. I’ll put it to good use.” You try to inject as much gratefulness into your voice as possible, even though you still feel odd about taking it.

“Yes, you will. Get ready and come back to the cockpit, we’ll be on Nevarro in a hour.”

------------------------------------------

 You’re used to men like Greef Karga but that doesn’t mean they’ll stop being annoying.

The way he speaks like he’s owed something from you just because you’re listening, the way it’s clear that every decision he makes is in self-interest, the way he eyes the women around him, yourself included. He isn’t outright dismissive like some men; such as the guard placed behind him only having eyes for your partner; but you can tell he either doesn’t take you seriously or he is more concerned about how he can sexualize you. 

He definitely isn’t treating Mando as a joke. Annoying.

          But, it’s not all bad. You got a kick out of how a hush came over the dusty cantina when the Mandalorian entered. He had been walking behind you which, with a little imagination, gave the effect that they were all reacting to your presence instead. Even though in reality, no one had ever reacted to you that way unless they were leering. You like how they fear him. It's a turn-on. 

You wish they would fear you like that.

          Someone says your name, startling you out of your thoughts. You realize that everyone at the table is looking at you expectantly but you didn’t hear the question at all. Kriff, you need to show yourself up more. Mando’s reputation is practically handing you the job but you still need to sell your skills to get anything decent out of Karga. He’s so stingy with the quarry's, even with Mando despite how he kissed the Mandalorian’s ass when greeting him. You figure that Mando didn’t take on bounties often, which put his skills in high demand.

          “Uhh, sorry. A bit distracted. Can you repeat the question, please?” You reply, accentuating the please with a bat of your lashes while looking Karga full in the face. If he’s going to objectify you, you may as well play into it. Smiling, he leans forward and pushes a glass of Spotchka into your hands, lingering a little longer than necessary when your fingers meet.

          “I asked if you wanted a drink. Take it, I can see you need one.” He winks at you while you stare indignantly, wondering what he means by that. It’s not like you’re sweating bullets in here. You’ve been here countless times on countless planets. Seedy cantinas with seedier people. Hopefully, he’s just flirting and doesn’t think you’re nervous. Maybe the flirting is backfiring.

You grip the glass and wet your mouth with the drink, enjoying the burn for a moment. Mando tilts his helmet at the way you accept Karga’s drink, seemingly looking sideways at you. Narrowing your eyes at him, you drink again and turn back to Karga.

          “Thank you, the Spotchka here is lovely.” It’s average, but flattery can’t hurt. Karga laughs robustly at this.

          “It’s no Alderaan wine, but it’ll do.” He drains his glass then pours himself another, filling it to the brim before turning to your partner. “So, Mando! Word travels fast around here. I take it you’re a full-time guild member now! I’m not surprised, always took you for the loner type. In fact, I already updated your status to full-time before you landed.” Karga waits for a response from Mando but the man sits silently at your side. Unbothered, Karga continues, “But, I am surprised you stayed that long with Ran in the first place. Must be the pretty ladies he keeps around.”

          The comment makes you cringe but you still smile brightly back at him since what he is inferring is clear. Can he just register you already?

          “Not alone. She’s with me.” Mando’s reply is short and flat, with no reaction to how you’re attempting to work Karga’s attention, nor at the revelation that Mando’s departure from mercenary work has apparently spread across the sector. 

          Karga’s smile twists into a smirk as he glances between you and Mando, looking at both of you as if he wants to fit your bodies together like a puzzle. “Well, well, well Mando. Didn’t think you were the type. Is she a bed warmer?”

          Your grip tightens on the glass. What the fuck is he implying? You’re rising in your seat, about to let loose on Karga when a gloved hand settles on your shoulder and pulls you down. Excuse me? Do I have to go off on everyone here? Why the fu-

          “She’s my hunting partner, my equal. Don’t insult us again.” Oh okay, you don’t know why he stopped you and he still doesn’t sound all that offended, but at least he’s defending you. 

Not wanting to be spoken for, you add on, “I’m prepared with my information so that you can register me in the Bounty Hunters Guild. Pull up your holo, I’m done with the small talk.” Your back is rod-straight in the cantina booth, trying to look down at the Guild leader even if he’s seated higher than you. “Also, your Spotchka is shit.”

          Karga’s is unphased at your reactions, even rolling his eyes. He replies bluntly, “If you’re going to join my guild then you need to prove to me that I’m not wasting my pucks on you. Don’t rely on the Mandalorian’s reputation. If you aren't out of some brothel then you were a mercenary, were you not?”

At first, the audacity of Karga has you fuming, ready to stand again despite whatever Mando wants. However, as you’re looking out of the corner of your eye at the crowd you realize that the bodies filling the cantina are no longer milling around quite as naturally. It's subtle, to an untrained ear and eye not much has changed. The chatter around you remains at a consistent volume and no one is blatantly staring. But your senses are sharp enough to tell that everyone in this room is On Greef Karga’s side. If a fight broke out you’d likely lose, even with Mando being worth ten men and the shiny new blaster strapped to your hip. 

Also, your prospects with the guild would be fucked if you fought everyone right now, which is the whole reason you’re here. You have to play nice and it infuriates you… But you still need the job. 

Taking a deep breath to quiet your anger you look to your left away from Karga, only to be startled by Mando’s visor locked directly on you. Sharing a look, one that you can only guess the meaning behind, you find the patience to calm down. You turn back to Karga, locking eyes steadily.

“Sorry for insulting your drinks, that was petty of me. But I am not sorry about how you implied that Mando would keep some poor sex slave around, nor am I sorry for reacting that way. I’d like to start over… If you’ll accept my apology, I’ll accept yours.” You can’t help letting some stubbornness slip into your words. If he’s supposed to be your boss then you aren’t going to keep up a pretense of respect after that. Not without an apology. 

You’ve never given much thought to how you look to other people, how you affect the crowd when you enter a room. It’s not that you don’t think you’re pretty. Being assigned roles by Ran that allowed you to dress up and distract targets was a direct affirmation of how you looked, even if they were creeps. But when you walked into this place, the only heads that turned were for the Mandalorian. You've never had the experience of being scary to other people. You’re always having to prove yourself and show everyone that you’re someone who can handle what’s handed to them, an equal to every other hard character in the galaxy’s Outer Rim... it’s tiresome. 

Karga is looking at you again, a little differently this time. 

    “I respect you for being blunt. Do accept my apology.” He sounds sincere enough so you nod, lips drawn tight. Heavy metal suddenly settles on your knee, Mando’s vambrace is laying across the soft flesh on your upper thigh. He squeezes, oh stars. Now you’re feeling flushed for other reasons than anger. 

    “Do I get an apology?” Mando asks Karga quietly, voice frustratingly mild just like the other two times he’s spoken up in this booth. The other man grins at Mando, more jolly than he should be considering who he insulted. 

    “My apologies, Mando! Do stay with the guild, your skills are irreplaceable! I’m afraid my jokes can go too far.`` His response is light and humorous but no one is fooled by the tone. A Mandalorian is far too valuable to lose. 

    After a few seconds pass between the two men you clear your throat, annoyed by everyone dancing around each other while you’re still not signed up to hunt bounties. It’s your only purpose here but whatever. Karga directs his smile at you, pulling his holo from behind him out of his guard’s hand.

    “I haven’t forgotten about you, sweetheart. Now, I’m going to put your basic details in… Do you happen to be registered elsewhere, such as under an Identichip?” You shake your head; you always worked behind a moniker. “Great! That makes this easy for me. Simply provide a name, real or not, and I’ll set up a chain code so quarries are tied to your data.” 

    You provide your name while Karga fiddles around on the device. It’s unclear if it is really that complicated to work the thing or if he is just stalling. This feels a little too easy so far. Didn’t he make a huge fuss about proving yourself? You decide to ask outright, wanting to bring it up instead of waiting around for him to finish.

    “I thought I needed to prove myself to you. Aren’t you worried about wasting pucks?” You were trying to tease but the bite in your voice can’t be helped. You worry you might’ve gone too far when Karga looks up at you with open annoyance.

    “Do you want to go out back and shoot a few bottles down? Seems childish to me.” He huffs out a short breath and returns to his holo. “I know that you worked with Ran’s crew on mercenary missions which grants you some cred. You can tell me what your specialties were on such jobs and it might convince me to give you the mid-level pucks instead of entry.”

    This is unfair, everyone knows it, he’s the one who told you to prove yourself and now he’s making you feel stupid for reminding him. He’s the one who was so concerned about wasting his precious pucks. But now that you’re here… you might actually be able to talk Karga into giving you a better quarry. Taking a deep breath, you start to list your qualifications.

    “On mercenary jobs, I usually took a stealth role due to my stature. For certain missions, I would dress to infiltrate a group, sometimes carrying hidden weapons but mostly I would conceal poison in my jewelry, skin powder, or anything similar. I’m a great shot and am knowledgeable about starships. When I first started I had to work my way up the ranks, the lowest being mechanics. Within a year I managed to go from handywoman to assassin... There’s more if you want to hear, although I can’t directly prove anything.” You wish you could actually show all these skills to him instead of just telling him. Karga is right, shooting down dusty bottles like some sort of carnival game would be pretty useless, but at least it would feel more substantial than this. 

You’re about to open your mouth and tell Karga more when you’re interrupted by Mando, and he finally sounds emotive, no longer inscrutable in tone. “This is all true. I haven’t worked closely with her on every job but I noticed her when I did. Her stealth was critical to our success during hits. She often worked on my starship. The Crest always came out in better shape once she looked at it.” You’re not sure what emotion is in his voice but whatever it is, it reminds you that his hand is still resting on your knee under the table.

Trying not to smile too widely, you bring your hand down on top of the one on your leg, giving it a pat of thanks. Karga’s eyes follow your movement but thankfully he stays silent, leaning back with a pensive look.

“Alright, this is all very interesting. Tell you what, and don’t take this as an insult, you can either have two entry-level pucks or one mid-tier. It all adds up to the same amount of credits, however, the mid-tier quarries will boost your rank… Mid also comes with a time constraint.” 

There’s always a catch with this man you think, a little displeased, but at the same time, you understand that he can’t maintain his business if all pucks were given away in good faith. Mid-tier seems like the best deal, and you aren’t just here for the money. Presumably, this will be your job for a while so you may as well aim ambitiously. 

“What are the last known coordinates of the mid-tier bounties?” You ask him, trying to sound like you’ve not already decided to take it. 

“One for Corellia and one for Mimban. Neighboring planets.” You grimace, recognizing the names. How lovely, you get to choose between two shitholes. Karga is correct, the planets are right next to each other, so at least you don’t have to worry about fuel. Corellia is more dangerous but the planet is explored thoroughly when compared to Mimban and you’ve already been to Corellia once.

“I’ll take the Corellian bounty, thank you.” Karga slides the puck across the table with an unpleasant scrape before drawing out three more, stacking them in front of the Mandalorian one by one.

“Two are bail jumpers but the credits for each are decent. I also threw in one S level criminal, let's see how you do with that one now that you’re dedicated to my wonderful guild.” Karga grins at Mando so widely that it is almost a grimace. Well, he didn’t have to beg for the good pucks. Yeesh… Mando’s arm lifts from your knee and he gathers the pucks wordlessly.

Mando moves to leave, rising quickly from the booth and leaving you scrambling behind him, slipping your puck in the pocket on your pants.  He’s at the door by the time you remember to say goodbye to Karga. Not wanting to be rude even if you don’t really like him, you turn and wave. “Um, bye! Take care.” 

He waves back. “You as well, girl.” 

A powerful hand grips your forearm and pulls you none too gently to the doors and out into the acrid, volcanic air.

----------------   

    It would be nice if the man who called you his equal an hour ago would tell you his plans. Instead, he had placed a small bag of credits in your palm and told you to go get some food and wait. You couldn’t find it in yourself to snap at him since you were starving, the last time you ate was probably several days ago, before Cantonica. Your hunger might explain the snippiness you’ve felt all day, actually.

    Having finished your meal of dubious-looking soup, you get up to explore a bit before heading back to the ship. The settlement is small and you think it may be the only town on the planet or at least the only one in the area. The land around you is flat enough to see for miles. It’s impressive that Mando disappeared considering the lack of terrain to hide behind. He must be in the city somewhere. 

    As you wander through the busy main strip, peering at different vendors and booths, you start to feel dejected. Mando defended you, spoke up for you, and even backed up your claims so that you’d look better in front of Karga. Then he just… disappeared. Somewhere. No communication. That's fine.

    It’s a little worrisome, the speed at which you’ve become attached to the man. You’ve been together for less than three days, and you already feel weird being alone. You know that you’re being unfair to yourself right now, it's not abnormal to feel lost on a foreign planet plus you literally just lost everything you’ve worked for as a mercenary. But in the end...

    Being here, alone and penniless, reminds you of home, the one you had as a child. It’s something you try to forget about. 

    Swallowing the memories away into that off-limits area within yourself, you decide to leave the bustling road and wander down a dingy alley. Probably not the smartest move but you do have two blasters on your hip. The sounds of the crowd fade in the background as you wander farther and farther down the twisting path. 

    It’s almost funny how quickly things go south. 

Mere minutes later, you find yourself backed up into a wall with two Rodians aiming their blasters at you, your huddled form reflected in their massive, black eyes. One of them jabs your arm with his gun saying something in that grating, echoey voice that most Rodians speak with. You get that they’re both aiming deadly weapons at you but you’re honestly just irritated. 

    “I don’t have credits on me fellas, you can search me but you won't find shit.” They must understand Basic because one of them pins you to the wall while the other pats your body down, searching for anything valuable. Pulling the empty credit pouch from your belt and throwing it to the ground, he twists you to face the wall, grabbing at one of your blasters. The rare one that Mando just gave you. You start to panic now, the positioning of your bodies making you nervous as you realize how vulnerable you are, fearful that they aren’t just looking for something to steal. Kicking backward at the Rodian pinning your arms, you start to struggle against them, trying hard to wiggle free and pull your other blaster.

    You must’ve connected with a kneecap because you hear a sickening crunch at the same time the Rodian howls, falling to the ground. His companion makes a furious sound then lashes out at your face, fingertips just barely connecting with your cheek as you duck slightly too late. Your face stings and feels wet, his gloves seem to have sharp points on the ends. You pray that they aren’t spiked with poison. 

    The injured member is still preoccupied with his hyperextended knee, granting you just enough time to pull the other blaster from your hip before he joins his partner and turns on you. You throw yourself to the ground, aiming at the same time and squeezing the trigger right before you hit the earth. The shot connects with the Rodian who swung at you and he falls to the ground, shriek cut short. Twisting to your side so you can attempt an evasive roll, you attempt to line the sight up with the chest of your living assailant but your shoulder connects with debris on the ground, jerking it out of your smooth movement. 

The blast misses by a few inches. 

The pain from whatever you landed on shoots to your fingertips, numbing them. Noticing your distraction, he hurls his body at you thankfully unable to jump accurately due to the injury you gave him. Despite that, he lands on your legs and starts to drag you toward him, abandoning his blaster in his rage while dirt billows around your struggling bodies.

    You’re terrified, fear making you clumsy as you handle your blaster. You don’t want to die being strangled by some alien in this dirty alley but the numbness in your fingers has you moving slower than usual, hand heavy as you try to aim again. Sucking in a deep breath you scream, hoping that someone on the busy strip will hear you. But no one is coming for you and there is no time to wait. Panicked, you fire in the direction of the Rodian, not taking care to calculate possible ricochet points in the area. A shot connects, his heavy body falling on your hips, dead.

    Fingers still numb, you hurtle upwards and try to wipe the dust out of your eyes to look at the bodies. The first Rodian you shot is a few feet away, slumped against the wall you were pinned to, blaster marks littering the brick surface from your panicked shots. Disgusted, you shove the dead body off of your legs and stand up.

 As you analyze the second alien you realize something doesn’t add up here. 

Somehow the blaster shot that killed him seems to be on the back of his head. How is that possible? Did I manage to reflect it off something and hit him from behind? You’re approaching the body to look for other possible causes of death when a large shadow leaps from the rooftop, landing heavily in a cloud of dust. You curse and aim your blaster at his head, pulling the trigger before you realize who it is.

He’s lucky his helmet is pure Beskar.

“Mando! What the fuck, I could’ve killed you!” Stomach feeling like it’s full of rocks, you march up to the man and slam a fist into his chest plate, hard. Looking up into his visor you feel a flash of misguided anger, lifting your fist to pound on his armor again. “Where the fuck were you anyway?!”

A large hand flashes up to catch your wrist before it can connect with his chest. He looks at you darkly. “Do you always hit people to thank them?” he asks, while his other hand reholsters the silver blaster back onto your hip.

“What do you mean, you-” The pieces connect in your mind, the impossible blaster shot in the back of the head of the Rodian and Mando’s positioning on the roof. 

He saved your ass. Again. 

You already realize your anger is misdirected, he didn’t do anything to warrant it. But the adrenaline and fear paired with your entire experience on Nevarro have wound you up to the point of lashing out. You shouldn’t be mad at him, and you should definitely apologize for almost killing him. Also, you should be thanking him for saving you even though you probably would’ve survived the mugging anyway. That criminal was unarmed at the end there. 

But you don’t care. You weirdly want to argue with him, to try and break that cool attitude he’s been maintaining nearly all day.

“I could’ve gotten him easily. If I didn’t hurt my arm he would’ve been dead before you arrived, also you didn’t answer my fucking question. I thought I was your equal, Mando.” You mock his earlier phrasing from the cantina, hoping he’ll snap and say something back. But he doesn’t.

Instead, he does something so strange that all the turbulent emotions you’ve been harboring fly out of your body in one instant.

Bringing up one glove to cover your eyes, he holds the hand you punched him with at the bottom edge of his helmet, pushing it up with your clasped fingers. There is a quiet hiss and you can feel the weight of metal digging into your knuckles as the Beskar lifts. Your fingers meet with soft lips, coarse facial hair brushing your skin as he presses a kiss on the blossoming bruises there. Heat rushes to your cheeks and you suddenly can’t remember what you were yelling about. 

It’s odd. You’ve seen the most intimate parts of him but only now, having felt his lips, do you truly recognize how rawly human he is. 

Too soon- he draws away, the helmet settles back on his head. You step back blinking as the light hits your eyes, cradling your hand to your chest like it's been hurt. Which you guess it has. You can’t really feel it. 

Unable to meet his gaze you stare at his boots, “You’re weird and I don’t understand you.” Your words sound embarrassingly breathless.

    He chuckles quietly. “Good.” And after a beat of silence- “Do I get an apology?” 

Annoyed at how he mirrored you throwing his words back at him, you look up glaring, but you’re unable to put any actual heat into your halfhearted expression. You’re still thinking about how soft his lips felt plus, you actually feel bad for lashing out at him.

“Yes, um, I’m sorry Mando, I was only mad because I was scared. I actually could’ve killed you, and those guys almost killed me- or worse.” You shrug, eyes round as you look at the violent scene in the alley. “Plus Karga is an asshole and you disappeared, telling me to wait around like a kid. I was in a bad mood.”

“Yeah.” He offers shortly. Is he gonna say more or- “Karga is an asshole.”

“...Is that all you’re going to address.”

“You’re a good shot. You could’ve killed these muggers without me, I just didn’t want you hurt.” He smoothes away a strand of hair from your cheek, tucking it behind your ear before gripping your chin, twisting your head to look at the scratches the Rodian left. “Pretty girl.”

Flushing red again while frozen in his grip, you stand there with him as he examines your face. His gaze is piercing, and you don’t know what he’s staring at. It doesn’t take this long to examine a face. You think he’s just looking at you.

“Let’s get back to the ship, that scratch needs some Bacta gel.” He drops his arm abruptly causing you to sway at the loss of an anchor. Hand flashing out to grip his bicep, you regain your balance before starting to pull him along, heading to the street. 

----------------   

The walk back to the Crest is short.

 You don’t know your way around this city but shipyards are easy enough to find. You recognize the signs pointing it out after your time spent as a mechanic, streets gradually widening to form into a flat strip of land for the vessels, heavy machinery appearing here and there. As you walk, you oddly find yourself getting dizzy, steps starting to drag as you realize you may have injured yourself in the struggle. You can’t recall if you hit your head or if anyone hurt you aside from the gash on your cheek, which has begun to throb. Did you knock your head on the alley wall? 

The Mandalorian grunts behind you when you trip, quickly overtaking your pace to throw your arm over his elbow, then walking at your side and subtly holding you steady. The Razor Crest rises into view over the horizon, so you speed up, relieved. You want to sit down so badly that you even try to jog but Mando holds you back. His helmet ducks down next to your ear.

“Don’t overexert yourself. I want to make sure that scratch isn’t poisoned.” He murmurs, voice overwhelmingly low. Your stomach twists with desire and surprise at the tone of it, he sounds like he’s flirting with you. 

“Does danger turn you on or something?” You blurt, wondering if there is a pattern to the man's desires. He did let you suck him off right after yesterday's conflict and now he seems to be coming onto you after an attempted mugging. Is this a Mandalorian thing? Weirdo. He doesn’t answer you, but the ship is right there so you break away and march up to the lowering ramp. 

You pause in the middle of the hull noticing some changes. The small cot seems to be upgraded, a patterned blanket is folded at the end and there is even a pillow. That sorry excuse of a fresher is more orderly too, shower hose hung from the ceiling like an actual, well, shower. There’s a sliding metal door for privacy installed on the entrance now too. The previously barren hull has a touch of coziness now, not enough to get in the way of efficiency, but everything is just a little more livable. It is unlikely that he did this just because you live with him now but the gesture is still thoughtful.

“Is this what you were doing?” You ask excitedly, walking across the room to sit on the end of the cot. 

“Not the entire time.” He answers vaguely, fiddling with his vambrace to close the ramp and flick the lights on. You just sigh in response, laying back against the bed, the thin mattress has a soft squish that cradles your sore body. Eyes sliding shut you take in the lovely sensation for a few moments. A shadow covers the light behind your eyelids. You open them to peek at the end of the bed, already feeling a blush hot on your cheeks.

Mando is standing there, towering over you with his legs just brushing your dangling lower half. He leans over your frame, arm reaching over you like he’s going to prop himself on top of your body. Your heart pounds as he comes close enough to settle his hand next to your head, helmet hovering right above your forehead. The visor tilts down to look at you frozen underneath him, heat pooling in your lower belly. An almost inaudible hum comes through the voice filter sounding like the beginning of a word as if he were about to say something but decided against it. 

You find your voice, asking him in a trembling whisper. ‘Wha-what? Did you say something?”

He makes that low noise again, replying, “Those scratches need Bacta,” before he gently shoves his hand under your shoulder and pulls, sitting you upright at the end of the cot. 

Your eyes are round, lips pursed in confusion. Honestly, you forgot all about that. 

“O-Oh yeah…” You manage to stutter out as Mando backs up from the opening, making his way to the storage shelves to rummage around. He comes back to the cot with a tin box, undoing the clasps to fish out a tube of gel and gauze. The imagery of medical equipment reminds you of the throbbing on your cheek, which is now accompanied by a throbbing in your cunt. Very conflicting feelings.

“There’s no discoloration or swelling, you’re likely not poisoned.” He starts wiping at your jaw with a wet fabric that smells of chemicals, cleaning off the rust-colored blood that dried there. “How are you feeling?”

“Ummm, fine pretty much.” His gentle motions make it hard to think, the swiping over your skin is so gentle that you’re zoning out. That is until he reaches the actual wound, which stings harshly from whatever liquid is saturating the fabric. You flinch, “Ouch! Well, it hurts now.”

“That means it's working.” Mando picks up the gel and dabs it on your cheek which helps to soothe the sting. “You say you feel fine yet you were stumbling around a minute ago. Are you sure you’re alright?” 

His question is sweet but you don’t like how he points out your loss of balance. It both concerns you and is slightly embarrassing. Are you alright? You aren't sure, the stumbling could’ve been from a number of things, exhaustion, blood loss, or any other affliction. You feel worried now, grabbing at Mando’s free arm and locking eyes with the visor.

“I-I’m not sure… I’m kinda freaked out, is it possible that a toxin could have a delayed-release? What if I kneel over while we’re in hyperspace?” You finish the sentence a little high-pitched, unable to hide the worry in your voice. The Mandalorian circles your wrist with his fingers, bringing your hand to rest on top of your leg and placing his palm over it. His thumb rubs soothingly over your knuckles. 

“I don’t think you’re in any danger. I’ll take a blood sample for testing then we can stay on Nevarro for an hour, just in case.” You make a sad noise when he removes his hand from yours, but he’s already sifting through the box of medical supplies, probably to find something to test your blood with. Pulling out a tube he turns to you and holds your hand again, which makes you smile until you realize the tube contains a needlepoint to prick your finger with. Oh yuck, you hate needles. A life spent surrounded by danger and that tiny jab still makes you nervous. Breaking out into a cold sweat, you look away as Mando jabs your pointer finger; he must’ve noticed your reaction because his thumb starts up that soothing pattern again. 

“You’re a trained mercenary who is scared of needles?” His tone isn’t mocking, he seems to be trying to distract you. You just stick your tongue out at him instead of verbally responding, worried that your voice will shake. For some reason, Mando freezes at this, one arm halfway to the metal box, the tube of your blood in hand. It is so odd of him that you instantly take note of the reaction, wondering what you did. After a second he starts jerkily moving again, laying a small strip of paper down and dripping your blood on it. He pointedly keeps his gaze on the paper, refusing to face you even when you poke at him. 

‘What? I can’t stick my tongue out at you?” You prod him again trying to provoke a response. You gasp when his hand flashes up and stops your finger in its path, his thick fingers wrapped around your wrist just like when you punched him in the alley.

“Not,” he punctuates the word by dragging your hand down his waist, “When it reminds me of my cock down your throat.”

Your clit throbs again, slickness starting to gather between your legs. “Ummm… sorry?” You reply dumbly, throat going dry when he presses your palm into his growing bulge with a groan. 

His helmet glances at the strip of paper again. “Results are normal. We should still stay on the planet for an hour, just in case… How will we fill the time?”

You don’t know how to respond. Any former thoughts you had in your mind have flown away, leaving you blank. Staring at Mando, your mind races to form a decent response, but you must’ve hesitated for too long because he rolls his hips into your hand, fully hard now. 

Whining, you lean toward him reaching out your free hand to wrap around his neck, but he moves away from your touch leaving you flushed on the cot. His helmet looks you up and down, contemplating something.

“Are you feeling alright?” He asks for the second time, voice an octave lower than before. He picks up the roll of gauze, unused at this point, and holds it halfway lifted in the air in front of you. You aren’t sure what he is going to use it for, you assumed to dress the wound but from the way he is holding it, he must have other ideas. He would’ve already patched you up if this were just about the fabric’s typical function.

“I’m feeling fine. The gel is working.” It’s the truth. You can’t feel your cheek throbbing anymore. The Bacta in your bloodstream has a calming effect as well, soothing your anxiety from before. You feel good even, clear-minded and thrumming with energy. You can’t imagine what he is planning but you know you want him so badly it hurts. Your heart quickens.

“Mando…” You breathe, the way you say his name is both a question and a prompt. He answers by unrolling a strip of gauze and holding it out in front of your face. The breathing through his modulator is audible now, pants heavy with desire. 

“I cant- I can’t go slowly, if I fuck you right now. I want to try something else.” You nod fervently, completely ready for whatever he is thinking of doing to you however, you’re admittedly confused when he starts wrapping the gauze around your head and over your eyes. Mando unrolls several layers of gauze, a decently thick strip obstructing your vision to the point where little light penetrates the fabric. His voice startles you when you hear it right by your ear, asking, “Is this okay?”

You’re still wordless, nodding in response again. Mando hums and parts your legs with his hips, pulling you to his body and grinding against you. You mewl into the empty space in front of you and fling your arms out to find him, suddenly needing to feel as much of him as you can reach. 

Hands connecting with his shoulders, you pull him down hard as if you were going to kiss him. The helmet bumps you in the face instead. 

“Oops..” You murmur, embarrassed. Admittedly, you forgot all about the armor barrier between your bodies. Mando huffs softly and bumps you again, gently as to not hurt you with the heavy metal. 

“Wanna guess my idea? “ He asks, sliding down your body, his fingers trailing over every inch of you, touching you as if to replace him kissing down your body. He reaches your hips and pauses there. You can’t see anything but you’re guessing he is staring at you, the thin leggings don’t leave much to the imagination. A finger presses onto your clothed slit, running up and down the length of your pussy to gather the wetness there. You can feel yourself soaking through your clothing, Mando’s fingertip is gliding wetly along your folds as if you were unclothed. You arch into his touch, needing more from him; the overwhelming sensation has you falling back onto the cot, laying there with your legs parted and the Mandalorian still between your legs.

The world feels like it’s spinning for a multitude of reasons, first and foremost being the desire you feel for the man crouched before you. Other, more complex thoughts on the situation swirl in your mind, paralyzing you with their intensity. You honestly didn’t think he would want you sexually again, especially not so soon. It just didn’t make sense for your idea of the Mandalorian, the image you carry of him as a person, all based on your time together even if much of that time was spent living separate lives. He flirted and inferred to sex a few times today, plus there was that kiss he lay on your bruised knuckles earlier. He defended you, backed up your claims, and spoke of respecting you and your skills. He’s done so much for you today, but you’re still blindsided as you sit here before him, unseeing in more ways than one. Most of all... you can’t stop thinking about that kiss.

Seconds after you physically attacked him and he offers you a kiss. It was the absolute last outcome you expected from your efforts to taunt him, you wonder if he’s even allowed to do that considering his vow to never show his face. You knew he was actively sexual just from your awful experiences on the mercenary station, although you never gave much thought to that drive. It didn’t need much thought, in your opinion. He is a man after all. Face bared or hidden away from the galaxy he still has needs, even if he is devoted to a religion that you can barely fathom the depths of. Your wants and needs seem minuscule next to the enigma of the Mandalorian. 

This all seems unimportant when his fingers hook in the waistband of your leggings and pull. You whimper and lift your hips, trying desperately to speed up the process and bare yourself to him. The blasters you carry are still attached to your waist but you don’t try to remove them. Sex and guns pair together perfectly for the man.

Cool air hits your pussy at the same moment he moans low in his throat. “Fuck, look at you. Beautiful.” 

That reminds you, “Can’t look, can I? N-not like this…” You still weren’t sure about the gauze blindfold he secured over your eyes, your only idea so far is that he must be into this sort of thing. Not that you’re complaining. The temporary loss of sight has heightened every other sense you have, especially touch and sound. You’re certain you’ll remember every word of this encounter for the rest of your life. He’s complimented you several times over the past few days. Pretty. Beautiful. You’ll never forget that. 

“Still haven’t guessed?” The Mandalorian rumbles at your thigh, pulling your pants off your ankles and spreading your legs as wide as the cot doorway will allow. A short growl rips from his throat, his touch leaving your thighs much to your dismay as he fumbles with something. There is a heavy thud that you can't make sense of, he had to have set something large on the ground to make that noise but you don’t know what- oh. Oh, stars I can feel his breath. 

He took his helmet off. For you. The pieces are falling in place quickly but you can’t react to it- you can’t even breathe, every implication of his gesture setting your world ablaze. Your heart is pounding, arms stretched out from the tension you hold in your limbs, you need an anchor, anything-

There's a hot puff of air on your clit and gloveless fingers digging into your thighs. He must’ve removed those too.

It’s like you’ve been sucked into a stasis chamber, the buzz of your cerebral cortex halting all efforts to process what’s happening, enveloped in a place so quiet that you feel fucking crazy. The anticipation is killing you, you’re going to die here and that’s alright, that’s fine, you’d love to die here, in fact- wait where is he? His face is somewhere near your aching center, you know this because you can feel each breath he exhales ghosting over your pussy, the muscles in your hips want to squirm and seek him out but you can’t. Not with all this atmospheric pressure gathering, the weighted air pressing harder and harder down on you and you know you’re about to break. But you’re terrified you’ll disrupt the spell that keeps you both frozen here, still and aching with pleasure. You’re gathering the courage to make the first move when Mando finally breaks the silence.

“From now on,” you interrupt him with a gasp at how different he sounds without the voice filter, the tone is so much fuller and warm, but he then continues unperturbed, “This is fucking mine.”

Your yelp echos off the walls when his hot, skillful tongue liiicks up your slit, flicking at the very top of its path off of your clit. 

Fuck this feels so good, this feels so good, how does it feel like this, so fucking amazing? He barely even talks, how is he so dexterous with his tongue? Tortured noises fall out of your throat as Mando licks through your folds, trying to taste everything his mouth can possibly reach. He rolls his tongue repeatedly over your clit making you tense up and shake from the overwhelming sensation. There's a sound in the hull, you can barely discern the source of it at first but you suddenly realize it coming from your own mouth, a filthy mantra falling from your tongue.

Mando-Mando-Mando-Don’t stop- Please dont-Mando

He stops.

“Hey! What-” Your hands fly down and flounder around finding soft locks of hair and immediately latching on for dear life. Impatiently tugging at his scalp, you try to scoot down and find his talented tongue, your clit feeling cold and achy without his touch. But he’s so strong, a solid pillar of immovable stone and you can’t budge him at all, his only reaction being a deep growl when you yank a little too hard on his head. You must’ve pissed him off because one hand is suddenly on your heat, cupping your pussy with his palm but leaving a gap between your bodies, torturing you with the lack of friction. You whine pathetically at this game. 

“Mando-fuck- why… pleeeaaase.” His touch leaves you entirely and you’re more desperate than ever, writhing to the point where you almost slide off the thin mattress onto the floor. Your inner thighs connect with broad hips again, this time without the barrier of your leggings between you. When your cunt presses into his crotch you realize you can feel more than the cloth of his dark pants, he must’ve pulled his cock out because you can feel his skin, the skin of his cock brushing over you plus just a patch of it from where the hem of his pants is pulled under his balls. A ragged sound tears from both of you when his thick length parts your lips, grinding against your clit.

“I-I thought you weren’t, I mean you said-” 

“I’m not g-going to fuck you-” he gasps out, voice breaking despite the clear determination in his response, “not yet. I want you to use me and make yourself-fuck- cum. Fuck yourself on me.”

You’re speechless, there are absolutely no words in any of the Galaxy’s countless languages, known or unknown, that can succinctly express just how fucking turned on his suggestion makes you. Is this his way of giving back to you after you made him cum the night before? You don’t know, fuck- you don’t care either. Fuck whatever complex you had about owing him, you deserve this and you want it more than you’ve ever wanted anything in your fucking life. 

His broad body is propped over yours, cock grinding into you over and over again as he rolls his hips and groans out, “Well? You want it like this, pretty girl? Or do you-” 

You interrupt him by reaching between your legs and finding his cock, pushing it down your lips to your aching hole. He sucks in a sharp breath and everything is frozen in that quiet place again, just for a split second, before you press his length into your body, sinking down to the hilt. 

A broken sound comes out of you, your throat so tight that your vocal cords can’t rub together to produce anything louder than a squeak. However, the Mandalorian is not without his words, a string of curses tumbling from him in that gorgeous, rough voice. Fuck, holy fuck, you wish you could hear him speak like that for the rest of time, his real voice without the modulator hits you straight in the gut. He called you beautiful yet he doesn’t realize the power of his beauty has completely destroyed you. You’ll do anything for him, for that voice. When he claimed your pussy as his you realized that there was never a point in time where it didn’t belong to him. The Mandalorian moves mountains with his claims. 

He is like a mountain himself, completely stilling his body the second you let him inside you. You clench down on his thick length and drag yourself off of him, leaving only the swollen head inside your hole. You’re burning up, a sweat breaking out over your entire body as you try to take his cock. He’s so thick inside you, stars you can't control your fluttering lower muscles that pulse from the strain. The saliva and slickness helped him slide inside initially but now you’re clenched around him painfully tight as you try and adjust to his size. He lays so still for you, still muttering curses at the feeling of you, yet patient as you work yourself on his cock. But at some point, you can’t help letting out a little wail when you fuck yourself on him, the debilitating mix of pain and pleasure is fucking overwhelming and he can tell you’re struggling.

Mando settles lower on your body, elbows next to your head and armored torso brushing against your upper half, the ridges on his cuirass catching your nipples through your shirt. The movement slightly ruts his hips, an inch of his cock entering you accidentally. You swear and freeze at the sensation, face screwing up-it’s so good but you hurt just slightly. His mouth must be close to your face because you can feel his breath on your skin when he starts whispering filthy encouragement. 

“You’re doing so fucking good for me, taking my cock- fuck you’re so tight, how are you so tight- Maker that has to hurt, you can do it baby, keep-keep trying.” The elbow to your right lifts off the thin mattress, his hand caressing down your body, over your breasts, down your side, gentle trails from his fingertips ghosting over your skin and sending tingles all over. This helps to relax your muscles a little, you feel the walls of your cunt loosen just enough to relieve the uncomfortable ache. Wetness gathers around his cock from his encouragement, as you slide with more ease along him grinding yourself up and down on his solid cock.

It is fucking indescribable, a nearly out of body experience fucking yourself on him, every time you bottom out the thick head presses into a spot that sends flashes of white behind your eyelids. You can't even moan right now, the only noises you manage are shuddering gasps and whines as you feel yourself rise higher and higher. The peak is right there, you can feel it, you’re right fucking there-

“M-Mando, I’m gonna-gonna-fuck, I’m going-I-” You’re frantic, unable to string together the words 

The hand exploring your body diverts its path, reaching between your legs to rub strong circles around your clit.

He’s saying something to you but you can’t understand him, a rush of blood in your ears drowns out all other senses, the only thing you can feel is your blinding climax and the thick cock in your body. You’re clamped down tight on him as the sensation rips through you, building you up and destroying you over and over again. You can’t comprehend how he has the control to just hold himself there, you feel like you’re being wrung dry with how tightly you clench around him with each pulse of your orgasm. Eventually, the white noise fades from your ears and sensation returns to the rest of you, limbs tingling as you stretch the taut muscles.

Mando is trembling above you, arms shaking from the effort of propping himself up for so long. A soft noise leaves you and you wrap your arms around him, trying to soothe the tightness in his muscles like he did for you but the armor gets in your way. He makes a low noise in his throat when you skim over his side, finally allowing himself to rest when he lays on top of you, one arm still holding his full weight back so as to not crush you. You reach an arm under his shirt trying to feel more of his skin, but the padding and metal still attached to his body prevent you from moving more than a few inches.

This time, you’re first to break the silence, “What did-what were you saying?” you ask, not wanting to miss anything he says to you in his real, unfiltered voice. He doesn’t say or do anything at first, his hesitation lasting long enough that you resign yourself to never knowing. But then he lifts his head from where it lays next to yours and you feel the sharp tip of his nose brush your good cheek, over the bridge of your nose to the other side, then press closer into you as his lips meet yours. 

His kiss is so gentle that you forget he’s still hard inside you. All you can think about is the heat of his mouth crushing against yours, pressure held back enough so that he doesn’t dig into your injured cheek but filled with a promise of the energy he holds in his powerful body. You fucking hate those Rodians more than ever because you would give anything for him to kiss you with his full strength right now, holding back nothing. 

But soon -too soon, he draws back from your mouth and pulls his cock out of you. You blush at the obscene noise your wetness makes as he curses and wrenches the last inch away from your pussy, leaving you empty.

‘Come back to me…” You whisper desperately, reaching out for him.

“Fuck I can’t- I don’t want to hurt you.” Mando spits out, sounding wrecked, “I want to so fucking bad but I-”

You try pleading with him, wanting him to feel just as much blinding pleasure as you did from the way your bodies fit so perfectly together. “You won’t hurt me I swear, I can take it-you said I could.” 

He groans in a tortured, painful way, hesitating for a moment and you think you might’ve just convinced him to come back and fuck you- but the hand that eventually touches you isn’t anywhere near your pussy. He’s wrapping the gauze from your eyes, pulling it from your head to press into your cheek. You blink as your eyes adjust to the yellow light of the Crests hull, the usually dull fluorescents are piercing. Still, your vision is not quite blurry enough to hide the gleam of the polished Beskar sitting back on Mandos’s head. You swallow your disappointment at losing the pure tone of his voice to that damn modulator. 

“I can't,” he says softly, “you’re bleeding again. It was too rough.” 

You can’t argue with him. You feel a bit weak and dizzy which is not just from your powerful orgasm. Sleeping in the cockpit didn’t grant you the most restful night; you’re exhausted, slipping away even as he speaks. 

“I’m sleepy...” You mumble, your speech very simple when you’re this exhausted. Mando makes a low noise, indiscernible in tone now that it is passing through the voice filter. You hate that thing for stealing away the depth of his voice even as it fades with your consciousness. 

“Sleep now… I’ll pilot the ship while you rest. Sleep…”

And so you do.

------------------------------------------

     It’s many hours later. The ship hurtles through hyperspace as you stand and examine your cheek in the tiny mirror of the fresher, basked in yellow light. The wound isn't very deep but it’s long, stretching from the high point of your cheekbone halfway down to your jaw. You grimace at the sight. That will definitely leave a scar...

    The Mandalorian is moving quickly behind you in the ship's hull, arranging the carbonite freezing slabs in a way that you can’t make sense of but don’t really care about. You’re too preoccupied with your reflection to consider it. Mando takes note of this. 

    “Warrior marks.” He tells you, walking across the length of the ship to lean against the doorway of the small fresher. “Wear them proudly, burc’ya.”

Wear them proudly. 

And so you do.

[vinceaddams]

obvs feel free to keep this private, but I got recommended the UFH channel by a friend of mine, haven't gotten around to watching anything from it. I trust your judgement on the content, but my friend considers it her main resource 🙃 of course, since you only watched a few videos you might not be able to answer this, but was there any specific really bad/unacademic approaches I should keep my eye out for that my friend might have adopted? we work on a historical festival together so im concern

(I was going to answer this privately but then it got really long and turned into a post I want to post.)

Oh dear! Well, It appears that the lady behind that channel only cares about the 20th century, so maaybe she’s got good stuff on the 20th century at least? I don’t know, but the 2 videos that I saw were so incredibly awful that I’m highly suspicious of all her stuff. 

The first bad thing about her channel is that her videos all have a one or two sentence caption and nothing else. (I clicked on a few more just to check) No sources listed, no links of any kind except to her merch store. I don’t recall her mentioning any particular sources for any of the things she said in the videos either, she just declared them very matter of factly. 

Good historians cite sources! Bernadette Banners’ video on the history of PPE has so many source links she ran out of room in the description box and had to put the rest of them on a page on her website.  (Oh poo, now I feel a bit bad because I love Karolina Zebrowska but she really needs to do better with leaving source links. But she does talk about doing research, talk in a more nuanced way, and doesn’t present herself as an expert or academic, unlike the UFH lady.)

Good historians also embrace nuance, and aren’t afraid to say “I don’t know” or “I was wrong”. Presenting things in a “this person did this one big thing, and then this happened, and that caused this” kind of way isn’t good because history is more like “all these things happened and as far as we can tell it appears to have influenced this, which was also connected to this other stuff that we don’t know all that much about”. History is foggy and complicated, no matter how much the general public wants it to be simple.

Her description of herself also seems a bit... misleading? In her about page on youtube it says “Amanda Hallay, a college professor specializing in fashion, costume, and cultural history.” but if you look at the CV linked on her website the only degrees she has are in creative writing and art history. I’m not saying a person can’t be really knowledgable about something without a degree, but her whole online presence is about being a “professor” who teaches this stuff so I find it weird.

And if the 1850′s-60s video is anything to go by, she presents things in a shockingly unprofessional way. She starts off by saying she thinks these fashions are ugly and ridiculous and that she has some “theories of her own” on them. @marzipanandminutiae has a post with a lot more about what was wrong with that video, and a few others I haven’t seen. She claims that hoop skirts were oppressive cages when in reality they were a liberating garment that allowed women to achieve full skirts without the heavy layered petticoats they wore previously. 

She posts a photo of a naked lady and says “Now lets start with a beautiful naked lady and cover her up with ugly and unflattering clothes. Now this sexy naked lady isn’t so sexy” I wish I was making this up but that’s almost word for word what she said. Along with a whole lot of untrue or exaggerated stuff about Victorian modesty. She says dresses with layered flounces were called “pagoda dresses”, which isn’t a term that anyone has ever used for those dresses. She says this is cut down from a longer video she uses for teaching class, and I find the thought of this being presented in a classroom quite appalling.

After spending about 95% of the video talking about womens fashion in an extremely condescending and disdainful tone of voice, she posts what appear to be the 5 biggest and most extreme examples of 19th century moustaches she could find, presenting them as if they were what every man looked like.

This part really grinds my gears, because she says “I haven’t said anything about menswear because there’s really not much to say.” She posts photos of suits from 5 different decades and says they’re basically all the same, and also basically the same as a modern suit. Excuse you, there is A LOT of difference between menswear of the 1850′s and the 1890′s. Yes the changes over the decades are more subtle, and the colours are often more subdued than in centuries past, but it is absolutely not (as she claims) “the century when men stopped doing fashion”.   I personally am not hugely interested in 19th century mens fashion, and can tentatively date things in the first few decades but after the middle of the century I can’t. But people who are interested and who study that era can tell the decades apart. Because they’re different. And there is SO MUCH to talk about! Suits for different levels of formality, accessories, waistcoats, sportswear, sleepwear, knitwear, swimsuits, loungewear, underwear, etc. are all extremely different from their modern equivalents. 

It’s perfectly fine to only study womens fashion if that’s what you’re interested in, but it is not okay to then declare that the history of mens fashion is worthless and nonexistent. Simply not being interested in a thing is no excuse for publicly shitting all over it. (I’ve seen people do this more than once. We already have so few men who do historical fashion stuff! Stop putting off newcomers who might be interested!!)

The fact that her online presence is so closed off is also highly unusual. Comments are turned off for her videos, and the only social media link she has is to a private facebook group. (There is also a link to a fb page, but it appears to have been deleted.) Turning off comments is of course the personal choice of the one posting the videos, but the fashion history side of youtube usually tends towards pretty decent comment threads, and people often have nice little discussions and learn stuff in them. Here it looks like she doesn’t want discussion, doesn’t want to be contradicted or asked for sources, doesn’t want to learn new things.

I had never even heard of this channel until I saw @marzipanandminutiae mention it, nor have I ever heard any of the many historical costumers/youtubers I follow mention it, yet somehow it has 55k followers? I don’t know the demographics that watch it (especially not with the comments turned off!) but I’d wager that videos like the 1850′s-60′s one I suffered through are mainly watched by people who like hearing things trash talked, rather than people who actually want to learn about fashion history. The same sort of people who loved that Beau Brummell twitter thread, which was also full of lies and unsourced garbage. People like to believe the past was way worse and grosser than it was because it makes them feel like we’re smarter and better now.

Lastly, the whole premise of the channel is just bad. Calling any one thing “The Ultimate Fashion History” is a bad idea. Her channel trailer says “Youtube’s number one channel for original fashion history content” “we’ve got it all, fifty thousand years of fashion history”. You can’t have one channel that’s the ultimate resource for ALL of fashion history! It’s a huge, HUGE subject, and even if she did do actual good research she’d barely be able to scratch the surface of fifty thousand years. That’s like saying one channel is the ultimate source for all of science, or all of music, or all of cooking. No one thing can come close to covering all of it. I will deign to admit that she’s at least right to call it “original”, because she has some very original lies I haven’t found anywhere else. 

Most people who study fashion history/historical sewing have one or several eras they like best and find most interesting, perhaps with occasional jaunts into other eras. This way we can focus and get a much better understanding of the eras that we find most interesting, rather than just a vague notion of everything. 

For example: I’m most interested in 18th century menswear, and so far have mainly researched and sewn 1785-95 stuff, and more recently some 1730′s. I usually focus on fashionable civilian clothing, so I don’t know as much about working class clothes, and next to nothing about military and other occupational dress. Even with this narrow area of interest, which I’ve been obsessed with for many years, I still have so much to learn! I could never make anything claiming to be the ultimate source for 18th century menswear, because I’m just one person focusing on some aspects, and there are other people out there who research other aspects of it and their work is just as important. It’s all so big and so much, even if you narrow it down to one era.

Amanda Hallay is basically holding up a bucket of saltwater and calling it the ocean.

I haven’t watched any of her 20th century videos, so maybe they’re better than the older ones I watched. I don’t know. (But even if they’re actually good they still don’t have source links.) Edit: okay, nope, turns out they’re just as bad! They appear to make up the vast majority of her videos, so if she’s most interested in the 20th century then maybe she should just... make her channel more clearly 20th century focused instead of trying to paint it as a channel for all eras?

TL;DR, the main bad things about that channel are:

Lying and making ridiculous claims, not citing ANY sources. Spouting easily debunked myths.

Stating things matter of factly without any nuance, even though history is foggy and complicated.

Being extremely judgemental about historical fashions and talking about how much she hates them and thinks they’re ugly, which really isn’t appropriate for a fashion history teacher. You can hear the disgust in her voice and it’s awful and I hate it.

Comments turned off on all her videos, leaving no way to communicate or have public discussions. Unknowing viewers are left to accept her statements as fact without any outside opinions.

Claiming one channel is the ultimate channel for an incalculably enormous subject. Says it covers 50,000 years of fashion history when it’s mostly just the 20th century.

I would like to add that I am not what I would consider an expert either, and have no formal education in fashion history beyond the one college class that was part of my 2 year sewing course. I have learned mainly from books and the internet, and as I said earlier I still have a huge amount to learn. I’m sure a more knowledgable historian could put things better than I have. 

But I’m confident in stating that primary sources are needed to back up a claim! Sometimes even widely accepted beliefs turn out to be entirely unfounded myths, like that one about doctors using vibrators to treat “hysteria”. Total nonsense someone made up in 1999.

Wow this post got way longer than intended. Anyways, yes, I do not like condescending slideshow lady.

[jasperswh0re]

Savior [Raylan Givens x Reader]

hihihi so im like super in love with this character and i haven’t seen like any writing for Timothy Olyphant Characters besides Cobb and Mickey... so i thought i would do that for our favorite U.S. Marshall, Mr. Deputy Raylan Givens

Might make this a series. Let me know if you wanna be tagged if I make another part!

Summary: You’re going about your daily errands at the bank when there’s suddenly a robbery. Luckily, a U.S. Marshall was inside and there to save the day. Gender neutral reader btw

Warnings: Gun use, swearing

---

You tapped your foot violently against the tiled flooring of the bank. In ten minutes you were to be at an appointment yet this line wasn’t moving an inch. The beat of your toes hitting the ground had you bouncing at insane speeds. You hated waiting.

“You doing alright there?” You heard someone say behind you. 

You flipped around to see a taller man wearing a cowboy hat. He was looking down at you, an amused glint in his eye. He was handsome and his country drawl was deep.

“Just in a hurry,” You shrugged and smiled sheepishly. He chuckled when you turned forward to see that the line still hadn’t moved.

“Aren’t we all?”

“Kentucky life can be one hell of a doozy.”

“You’re tellin’ me...” He sighed. He was scanning the area, as if he was searching for something. Though, you didn’t think much of it and held out your hand.

“(Y/n) (L/n). Nice to meet you... I haven’t seen you around before,” You introduced yourself, snapping him out of detective mode.

His grin grew wide, “Raylan Givens... I work down at the uh-... Marshall’s Service.” 

“Wow. A marshall. Do we really still have those? You look like you walked out a western film.”

Raylan’s head tilted back with laughter, making sure to hold the tip of his hat, and you felt any sense of urgency wash away. 

“Like I haven’t heard that before.”

“It’s hard not to say.”

“Oh, I’m sure.”

The two of you stared at each other for a moment. Smiles were wide on each face and the socially accepted distance for people in line was crumbling between you two. 

“You’re not from around here, are you?” Raylan said. You shook your head no. “Where you from then?”

“Way up north. Just a little town in Oregon...”

“You’re a long ways from home then,” He lifted his head up once more to look around the room. His eyes would flicker back to one spot, not far from the two of you, in between sentences. 

“I guess so...” You sighed. You stared at Raylan a little longer while he was focused on something else. When his gaze landed on you once more you checked the line in front of you. One person had been attended to. You and Raylan moved about two inches forward.

“What in the world is taking-”

Before you could continue complaining shots rang out inside of the tiny building. Instinctively, Raylan guarded you and brought you down to the ground. You let out a yelp, along with a few other screams from bystanders, as Raylan forced your body downwards. 

“Sorry...” He muttered.

“Get down on the ground! Everyone on your fucking stomachs!” A man in a ski mask yelled, assumably the one who started firing. You couldn’t see since Raylan was blocking your view of the man. 

No one dared to move a muscle so he lifted the gun at the nearest person to him.

Raylan, who was knelt down, pulled a handgun from his holster faster than you had ever seen. The robber crippled to the ground before he could make the shot.

For a split second, you thought you were saved until another robber in a ski mask came running in with a much larger gun. It must have been automatic, you thought. You didn’t know much about weapons. Raylan directed his gun in the new robbers ‘direction but the newcomer let out a tsk.

“Nuh-uh, you put that here gun down. Or I shoot. I got two buddies coming. This won’t end well for you.”

Raylan didn’t move.

“I swear to god, man. I’ll shoot.”

Raylan thought it through in his mind. This criminal was either bluffing or telling the truth. He could shoot, adding another life to his belt but it wouldn’t matter much anyway. The authorities were on their way. The robbers were wimpy, so this wasn’t going to last long. 

He darted his eyes towards you. You were on the floor still, eyes wide with fear but otherwise gave no indication of being afraid. He looked around at the people and sighed, placing down his gun slowly. 

The robber skittered towards the Marshall and kicked the gun away, holding the automatic rifle toward his face. 

“Everyone. Jewelry and cash. Now! On your stomachs!” He hollered.

And they did. Two more robbers with their faces covered came in once everyone was down and they took any valuables offered. None of the three bothered with their buddy who was bleeding out on the floor and began taking out stacks of cash. 

Before reaching the registers, one of the men stopped by your figure and grinned. A silver bracelet sat on your wrist, you had completely forgotten about it. He went for your arm and you jumped in surprise, instinctively pulling your hand away. 

The man’s smile dropped to pure rage and shoved his gun in your face, his hand still locked around your wrist, “Give it to me.”

Your mind went blank. Raylan watched, ready to pounce at any moment if any moves were made and cursed himself for kicking his gun away. Ever worse, he knew it would be too risky to pull out his backup. So, he watched the robber decisively. And watched you carefully. 

Words couldn’t formulate the feeling in your throat. You wanted to swallow badly but you feared any outside movement would end up in your head blown off. So, your hand moved slowly to unlatch the bracelet. It had zero sentimental value, so you weren’t about to make a fit.

He stalked off after snatching the thin piece of jewelry and you dropped your head in relief. One long breath of air exhaled from your lungs. 

To your left you could hear Raylan muttering something under his breath. He was frustrated. Glaring daggers at the criminals in front of him. You studied his face while he did so. 

“It’s okay,” You whispered. 

His angry expression became thoroughly confused.

“What?” He hissed.

“It’s okay...” You repeated. “You looked angry, not only at these men but... also yourself. They won’t get away with it.”

Your ghost of a smile reassured Raylan. Everyone in this room was shaking in their boots or crying out of fear for their life. Yet here you were making sure that he was okay. Immediately after a gun was propped against your skull.

Had you not said a word, he’d have done something brash. Something that Art would definitely not be happy about. More AUSA cases, more paperwork. His gun wasn’t far, too. Instead here was this random person, laying next to him calm as can be.

And in all seriousness, you were a terrified. You’ve never been a part of something so scary. But you knew just as well as Raylan that these men wouldn’t be successful. Everyone would be okay if they just complied. 

If, is the key word here.

Not far from the two of you, one of the robbers started making trouble. It was the same one that had confronted you. A man on the floor was aggravated, he didn’t want to give up his watch. So, as expected, the robber stuck a gun to his head. Raylan looked at his gun that was a few feet away. 

The criminal continued to shove the weapon in the man’s face, screaming for the watch. 

“I will shoot you fucking dead old man. Give me the goddamn watch.”

The man shook his head furiously. The robber opened his mouth once more to yell but was interrupted by the sound of a gun clicking. 

“You wanna put that down now... don’t try anything.”

Raylan had his handgun pressed against the man’s head. His accomplacises were in the back, trying to open the large safes, so the man was left on his own. 

“You wanna make the right decision now, don’t you?” Raylan’s southern drawl was calm but sharp. “You can either die right here... or go to jail. It’s that simple...”

There was no response, but the criminal set down his automatic slowly. At that moment the sound of sirens blared and officers stormed through the building. Raylan took the man by the wrists and shoved him at an nearby police officer, while shouting that his buddies were in the building somewhere.

With a sigh, you watched the chaos reign through the building. Much to your surprise, Raylan approached you with a grin.

“You’re pretty weird, you know?”

“Excuse me?”

“Nothin’ bad,” Raylan folded his arms. “You weren’t afraid. You didn’t even tremble in fear.”

“I don’t tremble,” You shrugged.

“Hell, I’ll believe you. Your hand was steady when giving him your bracelet.”

“I tend to stay calm in situations like these.”

“So you’ve had something happen?” Raylan tilted his head.

You paused, thinking of the words to say. 

“I guess you could say that...” You finally smiled at the man in front of you. “Thank you.”

“For what?”

“You saved all these people today. Especially that man,” You pointed at a victim. “And in a way, you saved me.”

“I couldn’t save your bracelet,” He lifted his brows. He seemed to regret that he didn’t stop the robber.

“You can make it up to me sometime...” You said, placing a hand on his upper arm. Raylan gave you a sweet smile. “See you around, cowboy.”

[woundjob]

Hi, anon from the question about the portrayal of drug use in Wolfstar fics here.

I think I worded my ask poorly, because I didn’t at all mean to demonize the use of drugs or alcohol as coping mechanisms or just in general. I completely understand why people use substances to get through the day, especially those who live in situations they can’t escape from, and drugs or alcohol provide comfort or relief. Some people use them for fun, whereas for others it can be a matter of survival.

Montparnasse’s fic “Eclipse and Transit” mentions that Peter suspects Remus of using heroin, and Sirius comments on his own use of cocaine in the story. That was what prompted my ask. I think it makes a lot of sense that people in their situation might use drugs, especially with all the shit happening to them and around them in First War-era fics.

I do think that it’s a subject that needs to be approached carefully, because there’s a huge difference between writing from experience and writing as someone who’s not done any research or is looking at a subject with no understanding of its impact on others. Not exactly the same, but I’m hesitant to read fics that discuss sex work when written by people who have never been sex workers themselves, or at least have a good understanding of the issues that sex workers face in their daily lives, because it’s easy for things to be portrayed in ways that are ignorant or hurtful.

I was curious about your thoughts on the matter because you have interesting perspectives and headcanons about R&S, and I enjoy reading them. I’m sorry that the way I worded my ask was insensitive, and hope that this makes a bit more sense.

its okay!! thanks so much for sending a follow up, i know i can be kind of a bitch when people send me shit thats weird or insensitive from my point of view, so i rlly appreciate the further thought and im sorry for immediately dismissing you <3

in the professional world, ive done a lot of freelance editing for peoples manuscripts. mostly novellas and short stories, but some graphic works and longer novels, too. im a sensitivity reader, meaning (im sure u know but for anyone else reading) i check work about people with my lived experience to make sure its an accurate portrayal. as a person of color and a gay and trans person, this can be anything from kind of weird or cringe stuff to outright harmful stereotyping. the work that i do helps people better portray their characters and gives them an all around better story.

obviously, sensitivity readers and editors dont really exist for fanfiction, unless the writer is really really dedicated. so, you get those fics that portray these sorts of things weirdly or harmfully etc etc. honestly, i think most people are afraid to ask a drug user or sex worker what their experiences are like. can you imagine getting the ask like, hey, whats ur life like? im writing a drarry fic. lmao.

basically, what im saying is, much to your point, if you dont do the research or have experience (or hire someone with the experience) with the subject youre writing, then you arent going to write it well. this goes for sensitive issues like drug use and sex work, but also really anything. heaven knows theres awkward portrayals of gay men out there, but even further, if you werent a fry cook or a business major or a single mom youd have trouble writing with and understanding a character who was one. research is imperative no matter what youre writing, especially with sensitive issues.

that being said, if you ARE doing the research, fics about sex work or drug use etc etc can be really well done. personally im not a fan of fics about addiction, due to my own experiences and my general preference for happy fics, but i can totally see the appeal. as long as a writer is willing to put in the work, i see no problem with this sort of fic. also, im sure i speak for everyone when i say montparnasse’s work is worth it. havent read that fic bc of the infidelity tag unfortunately but i love their work overall. great example of an author who puts thought and time into this sort of thing

anyway i hope that answers ur question at least a little bit. honestly, if ppl arent sure, hire a sensitivity reader! and sorry again for initially writing ur question off <3

[fatgothgf]

im genuinely so afraid of even jokingly talking about thinking a man is aesthetically pleasing to my eyes bc someones gonna use that to accuse me of not being a real lesbian or some shit cool stuff anyways like. theres a big difference between noticing someone is nice to look at and wanting to date or fuck em

i have eyes... just cuz im a dyke doesnt mean i can just close my eyes and pretend boys arent pretty sometimes. its the pretty ones that really sneeqk up on ya. fuckers

i could get into a longer discussion about my weird ass gender shit rn but i dont feel like it but god please never miscontrue me calling a dude hot as some like “bi lesbian” shit im not attracted to men but i know when a man is good to look at

[methylphenidate-already-taken]

Hi, do you perhaps have any marvel or spn vore headcanons? 🥺👉👈

aaaaa someone asked me about spn ages ago when i was super burnt out and i answered the ask so poorly. im glad i have another chance!!

I’m just going to give some gen thoughts because i haven’t watched the show in a while, but if more of yall want this im v happy to catch up on everything and post some more s/p/n

Ideas under the cut :)

I’m just gonna go for it w the main three

Dean: 

As much as he hates to admit it, he is a glut... and a cuddler. if its a protective vore senario. you bet your ass that once he gets back to the bunker he’s chilling in his room with his hand on his belly. 

to be honest, being in a vore senario is the only time he is able to be outright affectionate. i hate to say it but dean is a macho man and kinda has some internalized ideas about men and physical touch. vore is the the only time he feels he can get away with kind platonic touch

deff teases Sam in the later seasons once they’re vibing again by eating something that he knows will piss off sam and then giving sam a tummy time out too. 

Sam: 

As much as i’d like to say it would be Dean who has the loudest gut, sam actually gives a shit about what he consumes. He doesn’t have an iron stomach like dean. which means his tum gets v active with prey inside.

do not touch his tum. he will fucking kill you. 

healthiest gut out of the three. 

only one who  takes the time to lather the prey in saliva for the PREYS sake so the ride down is smoother for them. 

Cas:

he is use to pain, an angel, and he doesn’t eat food for comfort ever. it’s more that he’s not afraid to strain himself. So he can hold more/bigger prey despite being the smallest of the gang

He’s the kind of dude to just,,, pick up someones hand and place it on his belly to show them where his friends are. it’s weird. 

his passengers can be passively healed in his tum for a longer period of time instead of draining him outright in one go

idk! those are what came to me just now! I may think of more!!

[bunnyriviere]

my god i cant get my head out of this mess so imma rant, then MAYBE i can focus on my assignment like damn babe i thought your passion is stats, why are you obsessing over a guy that doesnt care enough. huh? care about stats instead babe!!!!!! i just want to only have to care about maths but i know my life is ruined if i dont have relationships, so i try. but i must suck at it so bad if everything just ends in flame like this, im so tired im teary eyes.

im on my phone and honestly dont know how to do the uh line to cut short the post so if anybody unfortunately see this im sr :(

this is not even about a romantic relationship, i dont even know why i just couldnt like a person like that but damn fine. this is about a male friend i made in grade 11 i guess. i have never liked men. im afraid of them and dont want to have to interact with them ever. i know its bad and i should change but i just really want them away from me im sorry..... so i wasnt even friendly with him, but i was polite, i know how to be a decent person. he was friendly and nice and friends to all which only made me think aw geez just stop being friendly i know this is not because you like me. but i was eating the snack he brought to class anytime he brought it without much thought cause he offered i aint gonna say no. all the while still not consider him a friend. not until a friend said im not being nice if im eating his food while still not seeing him as a friend. and i have always feel bad about not being friendlier towards men in general and he made the 1st move which made it easier for me to just go along. so i did and thats how we became friends.

hes really nice and i mean it. i think really highly of him. maybe its just me having bad luck so i havent met many that are nice?? i really believe they are just myth tbh, im about to settle for that thought. and this guy is really how i wish is the standard for all men. hes just that good, i have no complain. i truly like him and glad that my friend said something cause otherwise we probably wouldnt be friends.

again no romantic feeling. i just have to, remind the invisible audiences of this post i guess.

now we all know covid. and because of it, i couldnt come home and wanted to lay in bed even more than normal. so i didnt push for it when he said he couldnt meet anybody in the summer because he didnt want to accidently give somebody it. just saying that cause this is a 2 ways road right, nothing is ever only his fault, its also mine. i want to rant about my feelings but i dont want to dismiss any mistakes i made yk. so we didnt meet up then.

christmas came and before then we were talking about christmas gift and i didnt wanna any so i didnt prepare anything also. this person is too nice and i dont want him to feel bad. but anw i just thought maybe we can still meet up even if its not for gift exchanging. but i didnt ask or anything at all cause well, hes from here, he has family and friends that are definitely closer to him, and he had work. i know hes busy and if he wanna hang out he know where to find me. i just dont want to accidentally add something more onto his list of to do. he would be too nice to say no. and we are not that close i dont want to add more work for him. i dont have relatives or friends here other than him so im free anytime if he wanted to meet up. but that didnt happen, i dont think we talked at all. which fine i hate to admit but i was hurt. ugh hate showing how vulnerable i am. yuck. yikes. -100/10.

i just didnt think about it? i didnt try to reach out either so that was my fault too but just, if he didnt care then i wont either. so i really didnt think about him anymore.

came reading week! it really was 1 year from the last time i saw him honestly. he asked to meet up and if i want to go somewhere and tbh no im in the countryside rn is that the corect word so there are no place to go. but i remembered this 2ndhand place i like to go sometimes and i hadnt gone in a while so why not. so we agreed on that. and i know he was probably just tired, and there are people who sigh a lot, its not uncommon. but not seeing him for a long while and knowing this is a place i suggested, him doing that really made me feel bad. i probably shouldnt, but couldnt get the thought that he was probably doing this just because hes friendly not because hes friend with me. it fucking sucked. when we got out and he dropped me back at my home i still felt so bad he didnt get to enjoy himself so i asked if we could watch jojo together. yeah he loves jojo. i dont really care for anime im so sr i prefer realing manga lmao sr.

now ok maybe im still being dumb, probably. but tldr i truly believe people can be friends and affectionate even when they are from opposite sex. it didnt work out so well cause i got molested lmao cause some other guy thought that was cool to do. so that honestly worsen my uh wariness of men. but like i said, i think ive said it, i trust this person. honestly i do, we hug a lot and i had never felt afraid of it. i believe he wont do anything. im just really comfortable around him. so we cuddled while watching anime, that had happened before im really sr if you think thats wrong, i still believe that could happen.

but maybe its because i was tense from thinking he really didnt enjoy hanging out with me that much. i kept connecting remembering what the molester did and while i just knew i swear i knew he wouldnt do anything like that, i couldnt get it out of my head. i felt bad for that but there were just 2 things that happened so similar to what happened with the molester. haizz he kinda laced our fingers together but it wasnt handholding, same thing happened once before with m-dude and it felt weird but i didnt want to question that friendship so i didnt. and at some point of jojo i kinda jumped and he held me back, not pulled me back or anything but was holding me in place, and it was probably to make me feel safe but honestly if anybody even use a little bit of force i will just think of when i finally got the courage to turn around to confront the other dude for touching me, he held me back and i couldnt move at all. i think i froze a bit.

argh back to the main story. see how i totally suck? hahaha just blaming this friend for something somebody else did. im so sorry, i suck.

well after that we picked up talking again but idk! was it me overthinking? was it? because it felt like he didnt want to talk to me at all. it was, how to say it. he was friendly yes he talked hmm. damn how-- it felt like he didnt care for what i said. its a feeling idk how to put into words. and that sucks. he didnt seem interested in me before, felt happy enough when we cuddled, then back to being uninterested. i knew i know he doesnt want me romantically. damnit am i only good now for hugs. are we friends? what i meant is not sex but am i only good for physical stuff? i dont fucking know, the m-dude obviously just want a fwb and i was to trusting to notice. is this my gut feeling or my anxiety idk!

another side story. another guy suddenly expressed interested in me right when covid hit but it was because he couldnt get over his ex so i stopped talking to him for a while and picked it back up when i thought he was no longer idk being annoying about it. i thought he had to at least like me as a person to even express he liked me romantically. but apparently not. he looked so uniterested suddenly and denied when i asked, then stopped reading my texts.

so you see. i just cant if haiz ok do- do anybody like me? just as a person? idk.

god i knew i fucking suck for being so sensitive and anxious and im sr for wanting stuff but maybe i want you to look like you care a bit when i said you are reminding me of the m-dude, instead of saying ok we can talk less then. i already felt like you dont want to talk to me, you dont have to say that...

officially crying heyho.

just saying no you dont dont like talking to me when your actions were saying the opposite is not cutting it either... i also thought highly of the covid confession guy too but what happened now. im sorry for comparing you to others! but i learn from experiences... and this was sus... (yah its a joke i cant help it.)

and if i just agreed and stopped talking to him right it just, felt like a confirmation that yeah its true hes just letting me hug him not because im his friend and he knows i like hugs so he lets me. but its more like its convenient that a girl is hugging him so he wont say no. something like that. that sucks. thats all im good for. if i were his friend, it would include the talking too.

ah!! i know we are not close, we are both casual friend. he is definitely not on my top list to tell stuff to but damn i still like him enough to hurt. and to not asking for too much.

so anw i kept talking with the anxiety that never got solved and that made me frustrated and i picked at his insecurity to made him hate me enough to stop talking to me cause i couldnt bring myself to stop, id feel so bad. this is really toxic and i admit this is not the first time ive done it, to a different person but its the same thing.

hahaha act like i hate him while just want him to see how i feel so bad. yeah im a tsundere.

it worked so i stopped talking to him for a week and focused on talking to my other friends. friends i know without a doubt love me and want me because i really didnt feel that with him at all. sorry i know you were tired with covid.

that made me felt better and i was not in panic mode anymore, i can calmly assess things now. and before, i felt bad because i truly believed i was just seeing things, i couldnt see pass my anxiety and was blaming him for what, nothing. he did want to talk to me. but my mind was clearer after that one week and yeah i cant really make more excuses? yes i was sensitive and made things worse, but there must be something for me to pick up first. it didnt just come out of thin air.

so i sent him some texts saying that, because just leaving without a word is bad communication. i have to tell him and at least give him a chance to change i guess? did he need change? im doubting myself.

i- hm he just said yeah his look and way of talking really make him look like hes tired and uninterested, and laughed at my marie kondo joke. you know the one. idk! all i saw in that was yeah thats how it is, accept it. and i-- i, cant? i dont want to... i dont want to :(

but my mindset for just about anything is value the process, not the result, like as long as you put work in! thats great! and he- he was, talking... he put work in..... i would feel so bad to deny it. but at the same time, it was not enough... i hate! to say you need to do at least this and that! but it didnt feel like enough..... im sorry :(((( i am.

ive talked about my tendency to lash out. last time i didnt want it but i had to get away quick so i didnt mean it but i still did it. but this time i was truly angry. because i just wished there was more care for me but i know that was all there was, and i couldnt do anything about it. couldnt even ignore him. he was even drier then, and i got it, i lashed out at him, ofc he wasnt going to be friendly. but just why were you trying so hard... no, no it was not trying hard, you were answering texts at the speed of once every 2 days. why were you answering at all? you clearly didnt want to. but again so was i. did i really have a say.

so i sent angry texts at him. about how fake his friendliness was, did he really consider me friend, why did he keep saying no it was not that he was uninterested while it was obvious that he was. also that i want to fight him. i really do want to. hopefully he will beat me up hard enough that i can be in a coma and die in 9 months idk. (listen 9 months is enough time to make a new human, if im not awake by then, you need to let me go, thats my wish.)

he said that no he doesnt like to fight and thats the last text i got from him.

because ofc i dont hate him him, the whole him idk what im saying. just angry and hate that hes not matching me on how we value this relationship i guess. not besties like how he likes to joke, but eh, was hoping more than what i was sensing. i still sent a text being like ok fine do you still want to talk and if so how do you want me to do. but he didnt answer it in time so i decided for him that nah we wont talk anymore.

heyho i was sad, i am sad. and ok hear me out, HEAR ME, i dont use tarot for future but just for my feelings and how to deal with them, and my deck said ok babe this is the end, you will have to move on now. so i will.

tbh lmao for every relationships that i emotionally invested in. i always make an essay on my feelings because thats how i conclude things, and so i wont forget that my feelings are legit. so the moment i started this post, hes dead to me i guess.

wow this post is long. but i did really like him so.

im moving to uni city next month but i know he will leave in the summer so i wont have to worry about seeing him then. and probably not further in the future either, we go to different uni and are quite far away and our common are not gonna question things i dont think. dont think they would even notice, we are not in a group or anything. and even if i do end up meeting him. my feelings while was anger, but it stemmed from sadness and disappointment so it wouldnt be too bad. on the other hand... m-dude..... i am afraid of meeting you, lets please please please not meet damnit.

[dear-selena]

All I See (Peter Parker x Soulmate! Reader): Chapter 2

Peter x Reader Soulmate!AU

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Epilogue

Summary: You live in a world where women start to gain color when they meet their soulmate, but they cannot see all the colors at once until they’ve united with them. Peter Parker is your soulmate, but he has no idea. You want to tell him about the colors you see, but are afraid to. Sometimes, girls can be malicious with the soulmate troupe, and you don’t want Peter to think you’re doing the same. So you keep quiet, and experience one color at a time.

It isn’t until Liz Allan comes in the picture that all you see is green, and you hate it.

A/N: Thank you guys for the support so far! Im still having trouble with my tumblr account, so please excuse any typos to weirdness in format. I have a tagged list for this story now, so please let me know if you’d like to be added to it!

Chapter Two: Cool Colors

Words: 1567

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You anxiously wait for your phone to ring, purple engulfing your vision for fear.

Peter was out stopping a robbery at a nearby bank. He always texts you before he suits up, and calls after he’s completed his missions. He really doesn’t have to, but you insisted so much that it’s become routine. Ultimately, you just want to know your soulmate made it home safe.

And if anything, with the context you see purple in, you just want the fear of your soulmate dying to go away.

While scrolling through instagram, liking photos to distract yourself from your thoughts, your phone suddenly goes off and Peter’s picture appears on the screen. It’s a candid you took of him when he wasn’t looking. He’s shoving a giant slice of pizza in his mouth, and if you squinted, he was practically drooling. He hates the photo, claiming that’s the ugliest photo of him to exist.

To you, it was adorable.

You answer your phone so fast, you almost got whiplashed. “Hello? Peter?” You ask frantically. You were waiting longer than expected for his call.

“(Y/N)? You alright?” Peter asks, clearly caught off guard by your panic.

You sigh and close your eyes, trying to quickly calm yourself down. “Yes, I’m good. I just get really nervous when you don’t call after missions.”

“Well I can assure you that I just got home all safe. The robbers really did put up a fight, but I got em.”

You breathe a sigh of relief and say “Thank goodness,” as the purple faded into a light turquoise color, indicating relief.

Peter chuckles. “You get so worried about me. Ned doesn’t even worry about me as much as you do.”

“Yeah, but I care about you. You’re one of my best friends.” Saying best friend felt kind of forced if you were being honest. You wish you could tell him that you love him, and that your his soulmate. However, you haven’t had that conversation with him, so for now, best friend will do.

“Yeah,” You hear his voice waver. “You’re one of my best friends too.”

Your vision turns yellow.

“Well,” Peter continues. “It’s getting late, I think you should get some sleep knowing that your friendly neighborhood Spiderman once again saved the day,” You could almost see the smug look on your soulmate’s face.

“Aha yeah sure. But I wanna talk to you mooooorrreee,” you say playfully.

“(Y/N) you always say that,” Peter says laughing. “But it’s going to be a big day tomorrow. We have that english quiz and I’m going to try to talk to Liz again.”

You instantly frown at the mention of Liz, your vision immediately turning green once again. Peter has not stopped talking about Liz since she reappeared in school two weeks ago. He’s been trying to talk to her more as well. Even inviting her to sit with you guys at lunch once. She didn’t accept, as she had to leave school early.

It’s not like you had malicious feelings towards her. In fact, you had the chance to meet her. You walked into school one day and saw Peter talking to Liz, his face practically glowing and his body leaning towards hers. As you approached the two, Peter caught a glimpse of you and happily introduced you to the girl that made you see green. She was very friendly, and even complimented your hair and clothes. You had no reason to hate her. But nevertheless, every time Liz came up, your vision turned green and you felt your stomach bury itself in a pit.

Green was not a pretty color for you to see.

“Oh yeah,” You deadpan. You’re pretty sure Peter didn’t notice though. “How could I forget about the quiz.”

You give your quick goodbyes and hang up the phone, letting out a frustrated sigh you didn’t know you were holding. Knowing that Peter’s old crush was back in his life made you regret not telling him that you were his soulmate sooner. But you can’t just tell him, not with what he went through before. You weren’t there, but you know it really hurt him to have a girl pretending to be his soulmate. It’s a really cruel thing girls do sometimes, and you hated the idea of faking it. It didn’t make sense to you. You wanted your soulmate’s relationship with you to come naturally and lovingly. You wanted Peter to love you without you telling him anything.

But with Liz in the picture, things got a little more complicated.

________

The next day at lunch, your vision was back to yellow. You were sitting with Peter and Ned per usual. This time though, MJ sat next to you, nose stuffed in a book. Even though she was reading, she was also listening to a crazy conversation. Ned came in today telling everyone that his cousin, Gloria, finally got to see all the colors.

“She came to my place last night with her boyfriend, Cole, and she was in tears,” Ned says before quickly sipping on his Mountain Dew. “She said all the colors looked beautiful at once.”

“That’s amazing!” You exclaim. You love hearing about successful soulmate stories. It gave you hope that one day you’d have a successful one too.

“Our whole family was so happy too. We were practically thanking Cole for giving her color.”

“The soulmate thing is just so weird,” Peter states. “I can’t imagine seeing the world without color.”

“Yeah same!” Ned agrees. “I don’t get why it’s only the girls that gain the color.”

“It’s cause girls are smarter,” MJ responds, not lifting her eyes from her book.

“Hey, do you two see colors? Have you guys met your soulmate?” Ned asks.

You can feel yourself start to sweat. You did not know how to answer, especially with your soulmate sitting across the table from you.

Before you can answer, MJ beats you to it.

“No,” she snorts. “My soulmate is probably in jail for all I know.” You can’t help but laugh at that.

You look at the two boys to see them waiting for your answer. You suddenly feel anxious again. Should you tell the truth? You could always lie, and pretend you didn’t meet your soulmate yet like MJ. You could get away with it easily too…

But then you remember all those girls that like to lie about these things, and decide you don’t want to be like them.

“Actually yeah,” you say slowly, testing out your words. You’ve never talked about your soulmate out loud before, and it felt kind of weird. MJ looks up from her book, Ned’s eyebrows raise in pleasant surprise, and Peter’s eyes go wide as he suddenly looks down at his lap.

“Really?” Ned asks. “Do they know?”

You shake your head. “Not yet. I can only see one color at a time.”

“Shit that’s awesome! Which color do you see right now?” Ned asks, practically bouncing in his seat.

“Yellow. For friendship,” You look down and shrugged, trying not to gush over the color.

“Damn (Y/N), why haven’t you told them yet?” Ned asks, really intrigued by this.

You quickly glance at Peter to see him look away once again. Thankfully, no one else notices.

“Honestly, I want my soulmate to love me naturally, not because I told him I was his soulmate.”

“Oh my god,” MJ puts her book down and throws her hands to her head. “You’re one of those girls.”

You frown at MJ, a little offended at her comment. But she does make a point. Some girls really want things to happen naturally, and it’s definitely a cliche thing. You couldn’t help it that you wanted a cliche romance with your soulmate…

“You should just tell them,” MJ continues, going back to her book. “It makes things a lot easier and you get your colors quicker.”

“Yeah but it’s not that easy,” you retort. “I don’t want my soulmate to think I’m lying if I just say it all of a sudden. The last thing I want is for them to think I’m leading them on.”

“Oh yeah I get that,” Ned comments while nodding. “Men have to be careful who they trust when it comes to soulmate talk. You know, so things like what happened to Peter won’t happen to others,” Ned shoves his elbow into your soulmate’s side. Peter looks up and fakes a smile as his cheeks darken, obviously blushing. He looks back down at his lap sadly. You can tell he’s still not over what happened to him before, and it makes you wish you could take his pain away.

Suddenly, Peter slowly smiles to himself and looks up at Ned. “I wonder if I make Liz see colors.”

Your vision instantly turns green.

Ned starts to laugh. “Pete, when are you gonna give that up? You guys have so much history already. Wouldn’t she have said something by now?”

“Hey, a guy can dream can he?”

Peter suddenly stares off in the distance, and you turn to see Liz and a group of her friends about to walk past your table. She catches Peter’s stare and smiles back at him, waving at him in the process. In a trance-like state, Peter waves back, a smile beaming off his face.

The green gets more intense.

You hate the color green.

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-Tagged List-

@peteerrpaarkerr // @littlemissporter // @the-soulless-spider // @fakindob // @stuckonpeterparker // @godhatestarynn // @itsjustahuman // @saxgirl21 // @freestarlight // @clara-licht // @cats-before-us