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#i think its just that im finally finishing up processing what happened at work on friday night
unforseenkiss · 2 years
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having this weird emotional breakdown where I'm bawling and laughing at same time and I have no idea why ?? like it just feels so ridiculous to be sitting here fucking sobbing for absolutely no reason out of the blue that I have to laugh about it cause wtf ???
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sakasakiii · 6 months
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hi!!! how long does an average panel of one of your comics take??
i love your work so much!! it got me into silmblr hehe
HI NONNIE!!! thank u sooooso much for checking in and for ur lovely ask! it means a lot to hear that my silly ol scribbles were what introduced u to the glorious landscape that is the tolkien fandom! on tumblr no less!! i hope you stay a real long time, and have a blast while you're at it 💖💖
now onto your question! that's some good food for thought uhhhh i can try to estimate?? its been a while but i shld have some rough ideas abt each that i can share! the time frame each comic/panel takes is highly dependent on WHAT kind of comic it is. i hv two kinds of comics I usually do: 1) full-length, and 2) goofy/4koma.
i have a few full-length comics laying about in my archive, but my most recent one/best example is Ghosts which was around uh.... 7 pages excluding the bonus panels! in terms of the process, i usually divide it into 5 stages:
Drafting: this is either the fastest stage OR the slowest depending entirely whether i know what im doing LMAO,, if i have a set idea for what i want to happen, i might get drafts done in a few hours, but if i flounder, it can take a few days 🤔
Lineart: relatively simple enough once i hv the draft down, so id say anything ranging from an hour to half a day if theres nothing else going on irl
Block colouring (main actors): there are DEFINITELY easier and more professional ways to do this with mass-selection and the lasso fill/bucket tool, but idk how to do that on SAI (my art program) so i colour everything by hand HAHA which makes the process longer.... half a day to a day?
Shading: THE WORST!!! definintely my least favourite bc i find it tedious due to all the details/prettification of elves that i am legally obliged to pour into this stage 😭😭 as a result, it can take days!!!
Background + Lighting + Final Rendering: similar to the previous stage haha it just depends on how much effort i wanna put into the final product looking nice. roughly a few days? it kind of meshes with stage 4 anyways haha
just for fun, i hope this process gif for page 6 can illustrate that 👇
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these are just rough estimates, bc all in all, the time it takes so finish a page is really dependent on how free I am hahaha. Also, I usually work on full-length comics like Ghost which have more than one page all at once, which means I drafted all 7 pages at once, then did the lineart for all 7 pages at once, coloured at once, shaded rendered bla bla bla 😚 iirc, i think it took me 11 days in total to finish Ghosts before the end of June last year!
For goofy/4-koma, its usually just one page with less detailed/more cartoonish/chibi character styles so it takes a day or two days at most! again, it all boils down to how free i am hehe
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YEAH SORRY THIS ENDED UP BEING AN INFO DUMP but thank you so much again for asking and letting me ramble! <3 i ended up having a lot of fun looking back on my drafts n thinking back on my processes.... theres defininitely room for improvement, but thats another worry for another day heheh 😎
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yesterdaysnewts · 10 months
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so i just finished the first season of house md and let me say
your attachment to wilson is understandable, that man has the biggest brownest eyes ive ever seen
house on the other hand has the scariest blue eyes known to man pls buy her brown contact lenses
i actually like cameron x house i would potentially like to see more of that she is a very nice contrast to house and i rlly want to see that dynamic explored even though the season 1 finale did make it pretty clear that hes still in love with stacey
speaking of which im looking forward to seeing how her presence in the hospital shakes things up
im very glad they got rid of vogler or whatever his name was i had vivid hallucinations of punching him in the face repeatedly everytime he was on screen
i want to find out what the deal with foreman is. he has matching shows with house. he hates homeless people. he committed a crime at 16. he broke into a patients house to figure out how to comfort her while she died. literally who is this man i need to knowwwww
that brings me to chase. i cant figure him out either, first hes a brown nose to house, then hes snitching on him every chance he gets, he doesnt need to money but he wants his job, he is somehow to coolest person in this show and the lamest, he wears a leather jecket and looks like he belongs in a pantene commerical. hes my favourite
also i want it to be actually brought up that house plays piano? like in the first season there are 4 seperate times he plays piano (tho he only mimes playing it one time so technically only three)
GOD this show i cant believe i didnt watch it sooner
wilson really does have the most wettest biggest brownest eyes i have ever seen and it makes him so scrunkly i need to put him in a bag and bash that bag into a brick wall
and yea houses eyes are fucking terrifying and the worse thing is that someone on a discord server once edited him to have brown eyes and somehow it was scarier
also you are like the first person ive seen express a like for cameron x house so honestly god speed for that but you do bring up some banging fucking points
live laugh love stacey that is really all i have to say to that her and house have such a good juicy relationship
fun fact vogler only exists because fox wanted someone to like oppose house and that so the writers threw him in and in process made chase a dickhead (still bbg tho)
also FOREMAN, god i love him so much like mans presents himself as like 'oh smart doctor, id want this man to be my doctor' but then as the show progresses you just end up looking at him like 'what happened here'. in s3 you do properly start to see how he parallels house and it is scrumptious top tier telly and, like chase, he is a fucking dickhead. and the car thing as well cos like he goes on about how he pulled himself out of that but then you watch and he clings to normalcy and making something of himself its brilliant
and the shit himself chase. i find it so fucking funny how his first name is robert like he does not fucking look like a robert. and his relationship with house like fucking hell, you can tell chase is desperately trying to separate himself from his actual dad and by doing that he clung onto his work and especially house in an attempt to do that.
also 'he wears a leather jacket and looks like he belongs in a pantene commercial. he is my favourite' speaks for itself cause yeag.
unfortunately i don't actually think its bought up that house can play piano later on but you do get to see him play other instruments which is fun cause hugh laurie is a really good musician and im so happy they gave house interests outside of just medicine
happy watching the show is gonna make you go just a bit insane
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hi this is just a vent because i cant stop feeling bad about certain things its pretty disjointed. feel free to ignore. thank you for the space for this and the patience and kindness you consistently show. it feels isolating in disabled communities sometimes as someone who was medically neglected and falls into the margins of certain diagnoses and is still undiagnosed for autism and never received any official help, it was all off the books type stuff or i simply suffered/failed in silence. i feel like im not "anything" enough to be real or deserve help or community. that my existence is disrespectful or appropriative of the people who have more "real" experiences that should be listened to and lifted up more than me. that i got the "disability lite" experience somehow and would be misleading others if i claimed to be similar to them. "who needs more of some probably low support needs person ranting about their hurt little feelings, dont we have enough?" < evil thing my brain likes to tell me. i dont actually know what my support needs are its all very confusing and apparently only something a doctor can tell you. but i see people say that LSN level 1 autistics are always speaking over people and taking up too much space, and i get paranoid, am i doing that?! is that me? of course feeling this way just makes me more guilty. nobody has it easy, and you cant compare experiences. i know this. but i still feel like im not allowed. im taking something away from people who need it more. its not rational but im consumed by it at times. i had the difficulties of others used to guilt me into doing things as a child and to explain why i should be able to do something. have been dismissed by caregivers and doctors when i finally got brave enough and learned the right language to bring something up. so i just gave up. if i really needed it that badly, if it really was that disabling, someone would have noticed right? people like that dont just fall through the cracks do they? it's prevented me from seeking out local resources like day programs because they have waitlists, though they dont require diagnosis. all i can think is that im some ungrateful low support person whose taking something from someone who needs it more. and thats a horrible thought to have about myself or anyone and not a real thing that even happens. even a word to describe my experience feels like its asking for too much. i haven't even sought out SSI. even though ive never finished school or went to college, had a job, cant drive cant work, and only get by because i have very nice people in my life supporting me financially. i know how long it takes (im usa) to get on SSI. and how likely it is to get denied even with all the qualifiers above. how invasive and invalidating it is. dont know if i can take that process. but i also need more independence and help than im getting right now, because my issues are worsening as i age and i just cant do things or really live life. but it all feels like its not enough, even though i know theres nothing that WOULD ever be enough. thanks for listening.
This is internalized ableism in action. 1. All kinds of people fall through the cracks of the system. All kinds of people, with all kinds of disabilities, of all kinds of severities. 2. The idea that only the most impaired people deserve support and accommodations is far more harmful to ALL disabled people than the alternative. Disability is not a competition, and turning it into one hurts everyone. 2. Having low support needs doesn't equal having no support needs. And you clearly do have support needs that you deserve to have accommodated.
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yuyulie · 5 months
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Feel free to ignore everyone but I've just been looking at some of the things I made over the years and its so many things I gave up on lmao 😭😭 I see a bunch of things online, go and recreate them in MD/Blender and most of the time they either don't work in game or the textures look like shit 💀💀 so if anyone wants to see them, check down below 👇🏽👇🏽
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Had to go in the whatsapp chat archives with my irl to find this BUT THIS WAS MY FIRST MESH from back in sept 2022 apparently? I was soooooooo proud of myself this took me literally like a week bc of the weights and then the textures and I used the fuck outta this top in my game, every sim of mine was wearing it 🙂‍↕️ lmao but i took a break from the sims in jan '23 bc of my internship and when I came back I was like "OMG this looks like SHIT???
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I'll be honest I don't remember ever opening this in game 😭 but apparently this top was like 20k~ polys??? Crazy times
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NGL i feel bad abt deleting the first top since i made it for a tiktok cc process vid and people asked me when i was planning on releasing and i was like yea soon 😊 then never did shjdbhjdbfds
THE SANDALS WERE MY FIRST EVER PAIR OF SHOES but the straps would disappear when i made the sims feet bigger 😭 but its fine now i (kinda) learned how to make (very simple) shoes now so maybe ill post some soon 🤞🏽🤞🏽🤞🏽
The hat was cute but in cas my sims would get the question mark when i put it on them i don't know why?? and the bikini belt thing was just meh so i got rid of it
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The first top was also my favorite for awhile but the weights were kinda weird, everything else also had the same problems and honestly im glad they did bc they were all ugly af, SUPER high poly and just looked like caca in game thank god i deleted them (there were more things i made in between this and the next pic im abt to show but i don't have any pics soooo)
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This hello kitty necklaces I was so proud of and I made SO MANY SWATCHES (18!!!) but bc i always rush to finish everything before getting in game, when i finally checked them they looked real nice im ngl BUT the morphing was sooo bad on small beads😭😭 they looked even worse on the masc frames RIP
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I don't have the ref I used for this anymore but it was a really cute bonnet, mine just looked like a crumbled piece of paper plus its from last year so I didn't know how to retopologize or how to sculpt in Blender
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This was supposed to come out with one of the simblreen gifts but again I didn't like the morphs but I did use the base of the cross for my other cross necklaces so i guess not completely useless 🤞🏽🤞🏽
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Still proud of the lighter but I don't know what I was going for 😪
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The mp3 was so fun to make but the weights were kinda weird and I didn't know how to fix them 🙄 (I did ended up using the earphones for the folasade collection 👌🏽)
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Both were supposed to come out in the denim set BUT the more I looked at the pants the less I liked them and the skirt I just felt like it didn't belong with the jeans I did release?? its a cute skirt but I haven't felt like releasing it so 🚶🏽‍♀️🚶🏽‍♀️
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I made this back when I wasn't mindful of where tops should stop/where the bottom part starts if u don't want any clipping to happen (looking at the heroine top since it also had the same issue but I realised wayyy too late so couldn't go back and fix it LMAO) still its a cute top and I feel like I could fix it in sculpt mode now??? idk
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Very high poly 😭
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PINKPANTHERESS MY LOVE ♥♥♥ ( I made this around the time I started the follower set so I just kinda forgot abt it, maybe one day I'll go back n finish it)
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I think this was the original idea I had for heroine top? I gave up on it bc I just knew the buttons were gonna morph horribly since they sit right on the chest (also i never realised how similar it was to the tiktok top lol)
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Ok after this, all the pics are from stuff that was supposed to be on the follower set but this was the original mesh for the dee top and I had to remake it since I couldn't find tops with sleeves of that size to transfer weights from 😭😪 (if that makes sense)
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THIS JUST DID NOT LOOK LIKE THE REF 💀💀💀 plus the 'flower' is soooooo bad 😭 sorry to whoever added this pic to the pinterest board I flopped so hard 😖
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I just thought the quality of the textures was poor so I didn't even wanna put it up for download 💔 the jean quality I could definitely do better but the sheep patch/stitch(??idk) I couldn't find a clear high quality pic so yea 😪
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i LOVED this one but kept having so many problems with it, first the dress was flying off the sim in cas, fixed that then the weights started acting up it was problem after problem lmao maybe one day ill sit down and take a look at it again
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Cute skirt but the transparent/lace part would clip a lot
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the pants would clip out of the skirt when sims walked and i was very confused since i obviously deleted parts of the jeans that aren't visible but that didn't work so idk
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I also loved this headband but it was kinda hard to find a hair that would fit without clipping, if i ever find one I would definitely put it up for download 👆🏽👆🏽
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It looks alright in sims4studio (i guess) but in game the textures were kinda blurry
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CUTE but i forgot that buttons on the chest have shitty weights/uv's🤐
Thats all for now, I made so many other things but most of the time I just delete them bc i don't have the ability to make them work in game 😞plus I can't stand having files on my pc that im not using bc otherwise they r just taking up space 🤞🏽
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princesssmars · 2 years
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free love all around
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a makidrey x reader
its valentines day at constance billard, and your best friend knows just the way to make it even more special.
wc: 4.337 (wtf)
contains: fluff. polyamory. steamy makeout(s?) at the end. reader described having hair and being shorter than max. max is a little shit and audrey is confused about her sexuality but intrigued. aki bein cute and schemey. this is just a bisexual disaster.
a/n: them. just them. i started this in early 2021 (embarrassing) when aki pissed me off but i warmed up to him more in the beginning episodes of season two so triad x reader! too bad they all pissed me off in this season but On This Page Canon Means Nothing. i just finished 75% of this in a day so so if it seems wonky im sorry.
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.
.
knock knock knock knock knock.
a loud sigh makes its way from the heap of covers in the middle of the bed in the grand bedroom. this little routine max loved happened nearly every damn week and god if it didnt annoy you every time-
knock knock knock knock knock.
you let out a long groan this time, muffling the sound of the door opening and the footsteps quickly making their way toward your bed, and just as you're about to reluctantly leave the comfort of where you sleep a giant weight plops on top of you.
"y'know i was about to berate you for sleeping in later but im actually feeling pretty comfy now."
"get off of me." you grumble, pushing your knees and arms forward to try to push your best friend off of you, making him laugh in the process.
"only if you get up." he moves his body to face you, his piercing blue eyes looking into yours.
your heart beats irregularly.
"ok fine, just move" you sigh.
he smiles victoriously, letting out a small giggle and rolling over on your bed, giving you the reluctant freedom to get up and start your day.
you move to your closet, look through your picked outfits and choose the one you feel would work for today before you move to your bathroom to wash up. until you see max get up from the bed.
"don't even think about it." you warn.
his eyes widen and the corner of his mouth quirks up slightly, showing how he thinks hes so hilarious.
“hurry up then, i need your help with something.”
you take a quick shower and put on your outfit and makeup, max’s foreboding words stuck in your mind and nearly making you poke your eye. it wasn't often that max let you in on one of his schemes, but when he did you knew your life was going to get very interesting for a few weeks.
“alright, what are you planning this time?” you ask, exiting the bathroom and grabbing your jacket and bag for school. max is already at the door, taking your hand in his as he leads you down the steps and out of your house. but not before you both say goodbye to your grandmother, who’s all sweet smiles in the mornings and has packed you some valentines themed goodies.
“don’t alright me, l/n. i swear this is finally the plan that you're going to agree with me on,” max holds your bags for you as you browse through something on your phone. once you're finished you make grabby hands for the snacks, looking through it after he quickly hands it to you to see some filled donuts and croissants. popping one in your mouth, you muffle a go-ahead for him to tell you his plan.
“first things first, I cant take all of the credit for this. our sweet little akeno helped, don't give me that look! he can be sneaky when he wants to be. anyway, both of us noticed something about audrey and need your help with it.”
“what have you noticed about her? is she acting like a diva because I'm afraid to admit that's how she’s always gonna be.” you joke, giggling when max rolls his eyes.
“obviously not that. its not about her personality but her..attraction to someone we know,” he states, sending you a pointed look that has you nearly stumbling over yourself. “don’t look so surprised, you definitely knew something was up.”
you stutter, still trying to process this load of information that's been dumped on you. “i-i knew she was being nicer to me, but I just thought she wanted some emotional support other than julien! are you seriously trying to say she has a crush on me?”
”that, my dearest, is what we’re going to find out.” his hand patting your shoulder alerts you to your surroundings, seeing you've already arrived to the crowded entrance of constance billards - st. jude’s.
he still doesn't let your hand go as you walk up to your table, the rest of your friends already sitting down and talking to each other.
“dont act so happy to see us, everybody,” you announce your presence, a collection of small greetings being directed to you.
“that’s five days in a row you’ve been late, y/n. if you need a lesson on punctuality you could always just ask.” money chides, looking at you with her iconic sarcastic smile.
“good morning to you too, money bags.” you joke, laughing along with luna as monet rolls her eyes at your silly nickname for her.
“you two look cozy.” the distinct voice of audrey hope pops up, her eyes pointed towards you and max’s conjoined hands. you hear max laugh under his breath.
deciding to tease her a bit you rush over to her and tightly wrap your arms around her, ignoring her protests so as to not ruin her outfit. “aww, don't get jealous auds. you know you’re my favorite hugging buddy.”
“you’re an idiot.”
“cmon, you know you love me.” you let her go a bit to look at her face, the blonde looking everywhere but at your eyes.
holy shit.
you look to max and aki who are sitting next to each other on one of the benches, the two of them looking at you with knowing expressions.
“did your grandma give you breakfast again? please tell me she made those stuffed donuts that I love.” aki reaches over to grab the bag from your hands, figuring you’ve caught on and will tease audrey some more. his face lights up when he sees the treats, taking a donut and biting out a large chunk.
when it came to audrey, aki was able to tell what she was thinking easily. she couldn't hide the clear distaste on her face when talking to someone she disliked, or the way she always seemed at peace when watching old hollywood movies. his girlfriend was a visually open book, which he regularly used to his advantage. but the one thing he didn't expect audrey to take a clear attraction to was you.
the way her eyes trailed after you when you headed to class, how she would frequently bring you up in conversation. he even noticed how she also did the same with their dear friend max. at first he thought it was jealousy, but now he knows there’s something more behind those eyes. it wasn't until he brought it up with max that they came up with the plan to see just how far they could push audrey until she admitted her not-so-secret feelings.
“dont be do greedy, menzies,” you snatch the bag back from his hands, “yes she made enough for everybody. including some croissants which i know you love, auds.” you say, picking out a croissant and raising it to the blonde girls mouth. she glares at you for a few seconds before leaning in and taking a bite while maintaining eye contact.
“alright I'm out of here. you four are always so weird.” monet gags before rushing from the table to class, the rest of your friends laughing and agreeing before trailing after her.
“and then there were four,” max muttered, wearing his usual smirk and putting his arms around aki and audrey’s shoulders before looking at you. “what ever shall we do now?”
“not whatever you’re planning. ill see you three at lunch,” you say goodbye to the three before heading to class. you would need some alone time to process what just happened and what it meant for your relationship with your best friends.
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right after your english literature class with audrey ended, the girl tells you not to wait up for her as the teacher wants to over her last essay with her. walking the short distance into the middle courtyard, you see max and aki already at your table and engaged in normal conversation. walking over, max roughly pulls you into a side embrace, dragging you halfway onto the table.
“if it isn't our little star of the evening,” max gushed, smiling brightly at you.
“its eleven in the morning.”
“just enjoy my compliments, y/n.” ”anyway,” aki butts it, leaning forward to get a better part in the conversation. “thanks for going along with the plan so effortlessly this morning. we were going to take it a bit further tonight.”
they smile at you, aki’s hesitant and max’s borderline devilish.
“oh god what is it now?” you ask, slapping max’s thigh and laughing at his squeal.
“stop doing that! and what dear akeno was going to say was that he wants us to make it look like we're close so audrey gets a little jealous.”
your brows squint in confusion. “but we are close. we’re nearly attached at the hip most of the time?”
“he means make it look like we’re screwing.”
you move to smack max again, but he seems to expect it as he laughs and moves out of your hand's trajectory. you'd gotten used to max’s potty mouth but that didn't mean he could just say things like that in public. especially with this stupid gossip girl thing going around.
“have some class, wolfe.”
“if i did id be a different person, l/n. and we all know you'd miss my charming personality.” he purrs, throwing an arm around your shoulder. he’s really committed to this act, you think, as he looks like he wants to eat you alive. ”i can't believe im saying this but max is right,” aki says, smiling at max’s faux-insulted face, “if there's one thing i know about audrey its that when she feels like she’s missing out on something she will do everything she can to get it. she spent three hours last tuesday looking for a vintage chanel purse that got discontinued almost thirty years ago.”
“she definitely is persistent when she wants to be. which is precisely why this will work if me and y/n shag it up.” max leers. you consider criticizing his choice of words but decide to leave it.
“ok, so we make her jealous, and then what? she figures out her sexuality? what else?” you question.
they both open their mouths to speak but stop, not having thought that far. you can feel yourself slowly losing hope in them before max finally speaks.
“we’ll figure it out when is happens.”
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its a few hours later that you’re back at home, getting dressed as you wait for max to come back from his house so you can go to dumbo hall together as the next part of the plan. throughout the whole school day, max had taken his part of the plan very seriously, treating you how he would one of his new flames.
he moved his desk right next to yours in your language class, unsuccessfully trying to persuade the teacher to let him stay and let the two of you work together, he held your hand as he walked you to your final class before pointing out how audrey was staring at your conjoined hands like they were her mortal enemy.
before you got in your lift home, he bid you goodbye with a long kiss right on your cheek, smirking at your shocked expression. you could've sworn you heard an all too familiar scoff and a mass of blonde hair storming in your opposite direction.
knock knock knock.
fixing up the last of your makeup and touching up your hair, you glide over to your bedroom door before opening it. in front of you stands max, wearing a not all the way buttoned up striped silk shirt with white pants and dress shoes. a classic max wolfe get-up but entrancing as always.
you try to ignore his eyes dragging up and down your body, his eyes lingering on your hips and chest before resting on your eyes.
“i don't know it could use a few touch-ups,” max purrs as steps closer to you, your neck having to crane to look up at him, “y’know i wouldn't mind helping you out of that and being a little late.”
“oh shut up, you flirt.” you groan, pushing his smiling face out of your way to head downstairs to your shared lift. max trails after you, hot on your heels as he takes your hand to help you step into the car without flashing someone because of your dress.
the ride there is mostly silent and it surprises you. in a good way. you'd been best friends with max for years now and it seemed like every time you two shared a space you were always talking about something, whether it be his recent sexual adventures or one of your new achievements.
but this silence was…comfortable. he didnt say any other innuendos about your looks, deciding to just sit beside you and look out the window, his left hand slightly brushing your right. you dont say anything when he conjoins your hands together, no cameras around to see you.
you enjoy the prospect of having him in privacy more than you'd like to admit. it takes more of you to admit that it feels like someones something’s missing.
when the car stops outside the building of dumbo, max helps you outside of the car and stays beside you up the elevator to the bar, keeping a pale hand on the bottom of your back as he gently guides you. its quiet again in the elevator unil you get a shared message from aki.
aki : we'll be there soon. gossip girl wont shut up about you two. audrey is 😾. almost done!
you both laugh at his message, all too familiar with audreys signature pout when she's pissed off. you told her once in eighth grade that she looked like a kitten when she did it and she told you to shut up. she's been using the cat emojis since.
“just one more push and audrey will finally join the alphabet alliance.” max laughs.
“did you ever think this would happen?” you ask. “i mean it in the nicest way but auds always seemed like the straightest girl ever.”
“so did i until what happened last summer.” max laughs but cuts himself off, looking like he really didnt want that to slip out.
your brows raise. “what happened last summer?”
“iiii don't know what you're talking about. it was a completely normal day with friends being normal. about each other. yup.”
max wolfe was caught off guard. if it weren't so shocking you would have taken a picture for memory's sake.
“cmon, you can tell me maxie,” you tease, bringing out the pet name you used to call him when you were little.
“nope. mhm. not falling for it.”
before you can question him further the elevator stops on the top floor, the familiar dark yellowish lighting and mingling twenty-somethings welcoming you into the space.
max rushes out of the elevator, trying his best to avoid telling you what happened last summer. in the short walk over to the seating area, you keep your eye on him as he maneuvers over to the bar, hopefully ordering your favorite cocktail. you would need it for the night ahead.
you feel a hand wrap around your wrist before pulling you down onto the couch, your brain stalling as it rushes to comprehend what just happened. thankfully, it's just luna. horribly, it's just luna.
“tell me everything. when did you two hook up? or are you only dating? i really doubt it because your sexual chemistry is through the roof-”
“lune!” you groan, stopping her inquiries as she giggles at you. while you loved luna and went to her for advice often, she really knew how to pry to get you to open up to her.
“we aren't actually together,” you whisper, “its just to help someone figure something out.”
luna’s brow raises. “sounds like a weird favor, but i’ll play along. but be honest with me, when this person figures out whatever it is they need to figure out, are you sure you’l be able to just…go back to normal?”
“yeah, of course, we will.” it takes you a few seconds to answer, and you can tell by the look on the brunette's face that she doesn't believe you.
you're not that sure you believe in yourself either.
a glass of f/c enters your vision and you take it happily, thanking max as he settles on the couch next to you, throwing an arm around your shoulder. you try your best to ignore luna’ stare.
it’s a while later that the golden couple makes their appearance. aki looks good as usual, managing to effortlessly loo both adorable and enticing. he looks at you and gives a little smile and wave. it’s so sweet you don't know if those are butterflies in your stomach or plain sickness.
audrey is standing hand in hand with him and god does she take your breath away each time she dolls up. her watching old hollywood movies as a kid and falling in love with the styles that suited her perfectly, the blonde wearing a simple black halter neck gown with a diamond chain necklace. her hair is flowing over her back and shoulders, perfectly framing her face.
she ignores the both of you, flopping down on the couch in front of you and starting up a pointless conversation with julien, whose eyes dart between the four of you.
aki laughs under his breath and sits beside her, all of you struggling not to laugh at her little hmpf as she scoots away from him.
you get in the group chat when he waves his phone in your direction.
max : well she looks cheery
aki : she thinks i knew about the two of you dating and didn't tell her.
y/n : so she's upset with all of us. how do we make her realize she’s got a big fat crush on me if she’s going to avoid me like last season's manolos?
max : i’ve got an idea
as soon as you read the message max grabs your arm with that devious look on his face and announces that you two are going to talk in private. you look to aki who shrugs and audrey who is barely concealing her annoyance.
max takes you across the room and inside a set of doors, pulling them almost all the way shut before he turns to you.
“i’ve got an idea,” he says.
“so I've heard,” you laugh. “did you have to drag me across the whole room to tell me?”
“it was that week at the hamptons.”
your laugh stops. “what are you talking about?”
he sighs. “last summer, that week at the hamptons. we were hanging at the beach and when you came out of the water audrey was staring at you. and then that girl came up and started flirting with you and she was the angriest I've ever seen her.”
your brain takes in what he’s telling you and it helps explain… so much. how in the span of a few hours audrey went from asking you to help her get changed to getting shy when you noticed a birthmark on her ribcage. from asking you constantly when you were going to finally find a cute person to take you out to gagging at every person in your dm’s.
you just wished she would have voiced this to you. you noticed her slight jealousy and just took it as her being protective. you had told her numerous times that she was the only girl in your life, knowing the problems she had with abandonment, always telling her there would be room for her. it breaks your heart to think how she felt knowing you didn't feel the same.
but then there's akeno, your dear friend and audreys boyfriend. it was safe to say everyone - minus monet and maybe obie - had a crush on the pink-haired boy at some point. he was kind and maybe a bit too indecisive, but if you had a problem he was the most level-headed person you knew and he put things into perspective when you needed it. you remember when you came back from a trip thinking everyone had forgotten your birthday only to be surprised by a birthday party thrown by no one other than aki.
“i just wish she would have told me.” you sigh. you look at max’s face to see his mouth in a thin line as he stares at any place in the room but you. “maxie? what’s wrong?”
“god, stop with that nick - you know what, im just gonna say it. i only notice audrey was staring at you because i was. i mean, you do realize you’re fucking gorgeous, right? we really should have expected this. the friends to lovers thing is pretty played out but i thought i would wait it out long enough to-”
max’s rambling is abruptly cut off when you grab the back of his head and bring his lips to yours. it takes him a few seconds to realize what's happening before he kisses back, but when he does… you’d heard talk from boys and girls around school about the skill of max wolfe’s mouth but you had no idea it could feel as good as this.
it was both desperate but sweet, the kiss of two people who were long overdue to indulge in each other this way. its not long into it that his mouth prods yours open, his tongue meeting yours when you do so willingly. the suddenness and intensity of the kiss makes you dizzy, your hands blindly coming up to pull harshly at the brunette's hair. he moans into the kiss, slightly pulling away and smiling when you chase after his mouth.
“i guess it's safe to say we’re on the same page,” he breathes, the breathiness of his voice making you want to kiss him until he can't speak, “i always had a feeling you'd be a good kisser but jesus,”
“shut up, wolfe.”
“make me, l/n.”
he doesn't have to tell you twice before you’re bringing him back to you. this time he takes more charge, his large hands wrapping up from your back and pulling you in. he moves the attack of his mouth to your neck, sucking so hard at one spot that you know there’ll be a hickey but that excites you even further-
you slightly open your eyes in ecstasy and widen them when they lock with audrey’s in the doorway. aki is standing behind her, looking both scared but…supportive?
you (reluctantly) push max off of you, and the small noise of confusion he makes almost makes the situation better. almost.
audrey steels herself and drags aki further into the room before commanding he close and lock the door, turning back to the two of you stuck standing like kids who were caught stealing from the cookie jar.
“so it’s true. you two are sleeping around and you didnt even bother telling me.” she seethes. but you know her. she puts up an angry front because she’s hurt.
“yup, sorry auds but we wanted to keep it a secret for a bit longer. it was fun to sneak around behind everyone’s backs, anyway,” max boasts, sliding up behind you and wrapping his arms around you. “we would have told you eventually. we didnt think you would get so upset.”
“obviously im upset! my two best friends are sneaking around behind my back!”
“but…are you sure that’s why your upset?” you ask her.
she halts, keeping eye contact with you as she studies your face. you can see the moment she understands but squash it down, in fear that you don’t really mean what you say.
“of course. i should know these things. im…happy for you.”
“babe, c’mon,” aki begs, moving to join you by your side. “it’s ok, trust me. we know. that’s why we did this.”
she squints, eyes flickering between the three of you before she scoffs out a laugh and folds her hands over her chest. “you’re all assholes, you know that? if you had an inkling about how i do or don’t feel you could talk to me like normal people.”
glad she’s not that upset, you rush in and hug her body close to yours, lifting her a bit up off the ground as she yelps and slaps you on the shoulder. it doesn't help, she's barely concealing a smile when you look at her. you turn back to look at aki, who rolls his eye and mouths a “duh” at you before you move in and kiss audrey hope like you’ve been waiting a lifetime for it.
it’s both different but the same as max’s kiss, the desperation still there but less hurried. its slow and soft, comforting knowing you’ll get to do this again as much as you want now. that fat shocks you into pulling away from her, her eyes blinking up at you as she smiles prettily, the non-smudge lipstick that you got her working like a charm.
you feel a tap on your shoulder and look to your boys, the two having shared flushed cheeks and grins. deciding to finish your perfect little square, you giggle as you move over to give aki a sweet kiss as max drags in audrey for the same.
when all of you stop, you stand in silence for a minute just sharing looks before you all start laughing. normally after something like this you'd be nervous, wondering if you just ruined a relationship, but with the three of them you felt safe. you didnt have to worry about what you were, what you would do in the morning, or even the next few minutes. you just got to laugh in happiness with your favorite people knowing they felt the same about you.
.
.
.
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selfox · 2 months
Text
The return of fic reactions.
Still going with @gothicthundra 's Random Tales of Drakgo and I want to finish this amazing behemoth of a fic ���� I wanna get to recently released last chapter still >:(
Spoilers for chapters from Failure till No Mistletoe Needed ahead and as well as unhinged yelling
Ngl I'm very embarrassed that I read it so slow, its sporadic and limited these days (plus other internal issues, like being a big big pussy) which as lover of fiction in general feels unacceptable >:( so you might see me complaining about myself here ^^”
Failure
Holy shoot, I didn't expect the action with big-ish injuries rjsjsjs
Drakken rushing to save Shego is doing something for me. Including him sharing his coat to warm her up
Omfg, Shego🤣 I need to draw this
OTL you two with your head injuries
Welp
Why does their bickering brings me so much comfort?
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How?
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Shego, you're a sly fox
I am laughing so hard rn
“Shego... Can... Can I borrow your hand for a moment” pffff thats what HE said 🤣🤣🤣 sorry, dr D, but 🤣🤣🤣
«"You know most fatal falls of the elderly happen in the bathroom,” Shego's voice came from the crack in the door » Shego, you'll not help him like that xD
Told ya so. Now I understand the name of this chapter more. Poor Dr D.
Oh FUCK
OH FUCK??
Oh geez dude OTL
Yeah I would check on him too........ Do they end up in the same bed, cus that would be easier for keeping an eye on him?
Called it.
Drakken and his adhd episode xxx
.... Hello depression, my old friend
You both need a therapy
SHEGO OH MY FUCKING GOD DAMN DAYM
🥺😭🥹🥺
Drew, you are so very easy to startle
Set-backs
DAAAWWW that pillow fort art!
Sidenote, as I've noticed how much chapter names been bamboozling me into thinking worse. Now to those double meaning names
Drakken are you building pillow fort? I would
Heheheeee
The picture of baby Drew and baby Eddie in a cardboard rocket tent brings me so much joy I didn't know I needed
Now I want to build my own fort after work
You're never old for pillow forts, Shego
Hehe
I went from feeling utter adoration of this, to having bittersweet feelings, to laughing my ass off
OTL "it's just you" ma'am, this phase can be interpreted either trusting him, or, knowing him, he'd thi nk that he isn't enough to be considered as potential romantic partner and I am glad that you realize that, but I WISH YOU'D LOOK AT HIM CUS I'M CERTAIN THAT HE DOESN'T LOOK RELIEVED
see
🤦🏽
OTL oh Shego, dear
Drakken the specter cedcdc
Fvgvgvggvgnaj
Nah Shego, it was a perfect way to get ya outta brain gloop
I really wish to see Grandma Pru ; ^; she sounds delightful
I want to hug them both
DREW DID YOU ALWAYS THOUGHT
YES HE ALWAYS. WITH SHAWNA AND SHEGO.
I'm seeing patterns.
Im definitely seeing patterns, Drew. Idk if I find it endearing or I want to shake some sense into him.
DREW TURN ON YOUR BRAIN. SHE PRACTICALLY GAVE YOU THE ANSWER.
SHEGO YOU KNOW HE IS A DUMBASS WITH GETTING IF PRETTY LADIES LIKE HIM. HE NEEDS POINT BLANK “I LIKE YOU” JUST KISSING HIM SILLY WONT WORK. HE JUST PROVED THAT TO YOU. TALK.
SHEGO NO YOU OTL YOU DO UNDERSTAND THAT IT DOES FEEL LIKE A TEASING? NO?! OF COURSE NOT. I WANT TO SHAKE BOTH OF THEM AND FUCKING ADLIP WHAT THRY MEAN TO ONE ANOTHER! THEY NEED A FUCKING TRANSLATOR-MEDIATOR
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Boneheaded little big shits
I am physically clenching my fists
Pls, does that mean she is stealing blankets in her sleep or is it a plot to make him cuddle her?
Correction, its a plot for her to cuddle him
Now the question of the day. Is she asleep or nah?
YES YES YES!
Oh gods. I need a breather. Oh gods. Do I laugh or cry???
Welp, she is awake.
I want so hard to shake them.
Those two are so similar in their thought process. Just SPEAK.
GUYS.
CAN SOMEONE WRITE AN ALT TO THIS WHERE THEY ACTUALLY TALK THINGS OUT. AND FINALLY HAVE THAT MAKE OUT SESSION? I AM NOT EVEN ASKING FOR A ROMP, CUS THOSE TWO DON'T NEED IT. JUST TALK YOU TWO IMBECILES. CUS MY GODS THEY DON'T NEED THEIR RELATIONSHIP START OUT AS JUST LUST.
:WHEEEEEZE: THEY ARE STUPID, YOUR HONOR
«We both could have handled that better," muttered Shego» - ya think?
“more head-shaking idiocy this way” oh I sure hope so
The Elephant in the Room
Shego, maybe thats why, he has such a hard time to understand if you see him as something more?
OTL Drakken...
Well I guess his impromptu dives into the moat can do that to a man
Shego, why are you a cat?
They are precious, your honor
SHEGO MY GODS
SHEGO
Guys, please, get a therapy
«We need to talk about the elephant in the room," her voice was right at the door.
Drakken strung a series of words in his head that would make his mother faint.»
Why do I feel like there will be LITERAL elephant?
Knew it
They are husband and wife.
… why do I feel the impending doom. Something definitely gonna happen in that pool.
DEAN! ohoh thats probably will not be good.
Helpful Hypotheticals
I am fear
*looks at the illustration* Shego~
I am so afraid of reading this chapter
Yep I was afraid to turn the page >:( for a long time. It's embarrassing to me as a reader.
Hyperfocuse, Drakken, can happen frequently.
OTL
He is so afraid of her leaving
“this is ridiculous” - you both are ridiculous in your inability to have heart to heart conversations. Is there a thing? Couples therapy for villains-partners-that-obviously-in-love-with-one-another?
You don't know how much I irrationally feared reading this chapter. I enjoy this dynamic between Shego and Dean. But even now reading it, I feel how I am clenched. And I *know* that as soon as I finish this chapter it'll pass.... Until Drakken and Shego start being stupid again
Dean, why was I so afraid of you? You are cool. Call her out. Please.
Is he gonna be all fan boy at Drakken? Please! Please!
*WHEEEZE*
OK, NOW I FEEL SO EMBARRASSED FOR BEING SUCH A PUSSYCAT
«“Are you going to continue to push buttons?” asked Drakken as he leaves back but kept his eyes locked on hers.
“Always”»
👌👌👌
Hello jealous Drakken
Heheheh
Fanboy fanboy fanboy!
Federal accountant.... Is he working for GJ??
*forensic?* ok im definitely loving this guy.
Hehe Shego, c'mon let the guy sing xD you like it! You even had this song on your ringtone! FUCKING LMAO I DIDN'T EVEN READ THIS LINE! CALLED IT CALLED IT!
OOOOOOO Dean, Dean! Please help them!
That feeling that I'm also internally moving closer to him lol
LOL Shego is about to get sandwiched. LOL Dr. D, I'll disappoint you, she definitely wasn't angry 😏 and she definitely wouldn't mind you guys being this close to her more~
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 oh guys. I need to draw it 🤣🤣🤣
Ok, I definitely need to draw Drakken in that dress
Oh oh. Oh oh. Ohohh. Drakken.. Morr like she agreed for a date with Dean because he reminded her of you
OTL oough baby boy OTL
“you meant you. She'd prefer anyone but you...” OTL ough baby boy, how wrong you are OYL
Deck the lair with too much tinsel
Hehe, sweet tooth shego
Shego, thats why he can't get if you like him or not
Ooohhhh thats when those 2 got together.
Oh no Shego, he is. Why would he admit that openly to you? Plus... To be honest it's kinda reasonable fear.
MA'AM
Jdjdjd you both are children
Reverse psychology?
Poor guy, never stood a chance
Boys and their toys
*sigh in idiots being married*
I love how this world is so tied together. This whole story. Not just the jacket.
I bet a dollar that Cleo helped a lot with this party
Hi Lucre!
..... Mentoring Ed..... As far as I understand .... Mmmaybeee?
That feeling that I'm also waiting for Cleo and Ed to pull their own shit together.
Ok I started to focus more on reading xD it's getting so very interesting.
A few notes on Shego, IMHO its sweet that she looks into more stuff for him and that she does see that he is in well evil-scheme-block
“why am I always surrounded by nerds?” - the cost of the evil profession, Shego. And considering that you are in love with another nerd and are interested in another....
Drakken speaking with Adrena about Lucre… first time for anything
TRIO OF MISCHIEF!
And F Drakken, I believe you got in the middle of a lovers spat xD
YAY THEY FOUND ONE ANOTHER!
Heheheh bi very dorks.... I need to draw those three xD man... So many plans, so little time... And always on a work trip xD
Adrena is adorable
Yes, thats definitely both Cleo's and Ed's party
Х)very classy, Eddie
This… isn't gonna bode well
No mistletoe needed
Aw, girlie 🥺 even though I personally don't see the appeal of this game, I get it
OTL "it's just kissing ... Stop being so uptight. It's meaningless.” fuuuuu I just know how Drakken gonna think
*props cheek on my fist* you guys, no wonder either villains ship you or think that you are already married
SHEGO WHY DID YOU LIE OTL
I want to hit both of them with a pillow
They are such dorks, I love them. Even Eddie. Cus of this fic, Eddie just grew on me, even if I want to throttle him on occasion
They are such a dorky family OMG. Their banter is so beautiful. And I understand Camille saying its weird. Well those 3 celebrated major family holidays
ADRENA
NO MORE ALCOHOL INDEED
Oh gods, so many pairings 🤣🤣
I'm so glad I've never had to experience this game
YAY THOSE TWO
I will laugh if Duff's spin would land back on Monty
Nope
Eddie, EVEN I JUMPED, GT HOW DID YOU DO THAT???
F Duff
F Fist
LOL I CALLED IT KINDA, sorry Fist, but I'm too much of an ass. Were you cleansing your palate?
Id say polycule
Oh those two hate one another
Oh those two HATE one another
Those 2 shouldn't mix alcohol
Why I got the feeling of impending doom?
Oh gods those 2 are playing with fire one greed fire and other from monster truck.
*gif not looking at it*
*series of several unintelligent noises*
Well, yes, of course, she is trying to make him mad.
«“why is your face red?”
“....I was laughing”»
Press X to doubt
To She-She's POV
Drakken and Adrena is such a weird mix
“It's just a game” not if you have so many unresolved issues, guys. That phase hurts them both so much.
*snort* does that count as indirect kissing?
Children and their booze
I audibly cursed. Oh god Dementor
Heya Drak POV
Gods idk why I love that twinning in their brains even if I get frustrated with how dumb those can be.
“At least he knew why it made him uncomfortable; he didn't need alcohol to understand that. That being said, he wasn't angry about it...
Just...plotting whoever she kissed, death.” BRUH🤣
🤣🤣🤣 yeah nah, those two would rather kiss a frog than one another
Yeah those two definitely forgot about that.
How many times they kissed already? I'm counting at least 4.
Oh gods, this internal turmoil.
*the high-pitched squeaks of a shipper*
😭😭😭
SHE WANTS TO KISS YOU, YOU DUMMY
*sad howls*
Welp.
Dude, your luck is rotten.
Even though it was over, I guess not
......... Why do I still think that Eddie also wants to talk with Drakken?
COUSIN FAMILY TIME!
I want to hug and squeeze those 2, seriously.
The Cuz code? Omg they are adorable.
*Finally*
Awww 🥺 Eddie! Worried about Lucre and awww 🥺
Pffff like brother like cousin 🤣 family genes for loving dangerously evil
🤣🤣🤣🤣 OH I SEE ED YOU ARE PULLING BIG GUNS FOR BLACKMAIL
WHICH ISN'T EVEN A LIE
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Oh gods, can't wait to read AND HOPE IT'S NOT GONNA TAKE ME FOREVER
Afterthoughts
I want to see Eddie being Dungeon Master in some campaign. Think it'd be interesting spin.
Duff and Monty
Seriously, those 2 have one of the most interesting relationship in this fic. Cus sometimes like our idiots it's so in the open, but sometimes its one of those blink moments. But it veiled so intricately into this fic. It doesn't have to be explicitly said. Which hooks me greatly.
I don't remember if I said it, but I'll say it again.
I guess this is what I appreciate about this fic is how alive the world is around. Even if we get a glimpse through Drakken and Shego eyes, the world is moving. Something always happens without our guys being in the middle of it. It's not just one set of things. Its many. I rarely see that even with big books that surroundings aren't a plot device, but it is its own thing. And I love it so much.
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Ehem…may i request some content on reader that draws (again) 🥺 kyojuro has really pretty eyes right? And so i wanna know what his response would be if reader mid sketching tells him that, and that they’d like to try and paint his eyes some time soon (as in ask him to be a model) 👀✨how would that conversation go?
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a/n: im finALLY writing again- who knows how long this brain blast will last LOL - E im sorry this took so long!! thanks for being patient with me lol ;n;
-x-x-x-
it's become a very common occurrence that kyojuro is present during your downtime- whether than be reading, resting or indulging yourself in your hobbies
your hobby in art still fascinates him and entertains him
he really likes checking on your progress from time to time to see how you start and how you do things to get the end result
he's also verY supportive in your process- even if you say that you hate it even though youre not close to finishing, he makes sure you have enough encouragement to keep going!
kyojuro is 'trust the process personified and put through an amplifier
its in one of your sit-ins that he's reading a book that had been recommended to him through senjuro that you find yourself watching him instead of the other way around
instead of sitting in your art room, you were both sitting out on the engawa enjoying the weather with your sketchbook in your lap
you sketched whatever you saw, a tree, a flower, a patch of grass, a quick sketch of a bird before it flew away
it's getting later in the day and the golden hour is just around the corner of the clock
the golden hour is the best time of day for kyojuro- there was no question about it. it made him seem like a walking candle- burning brightly and lighting up whatever area he wander in
bring warmth with him along with his light
his eyes were the most brilliant of all like the burning wick of a candle that smolders and flickers with embers that fan it's own flames
he looks up from his reading momentarily to check on you beside him, maybe ask if he could see how far you've gotten in your sketching but was shocked to see you already looking at him
it wasn't like you to get distracted in the middle of a piece since you get so absorbed in your work
had something happened while he was distracted perhaps?
"Is something wrong, my dear?"
"you know," you start and his book gently closes, one of his fingers between the pages to keep his place while he offers you his undivided attention
"has anyone told you the sun looks good on you?"
he laughs at your compliment, and you don't even find it in you to be embarrassed because it was so very true
the sun did look good on him
tremendously good
"what brought that on?"
"it's just a fact," you tell him before using the back end of your pencil to move his hair around and open up the side of his face to show off his sideburns
the way your pencil cast a shadow over one of his eyes and left the other to glow in the early evening sunlight made you realize something
"i'd really love to paint your eyes kyojuro"
he says nothing as you start murmuring to yourself
"the way they still seem to glow even under a shadow, and this time of day is the perfect time for them to shine. they're such a pretty color too"
"you think my eyes are pretty?" he asks and of course, your flabbergasted that he could even think you didn't think that!
"obviously! not only are they pretty, they're emotional eyes. you can convery so many feelings through them without even speaking."
"i've never been told that before," he told you clearing his throat. "I must say, i am rather embarassed to hear you say so."
you laughed at him, leaning into his sholder as he ruffled at the hair you had previously been holding away from his face with your pencil
"thank you for saying so, my dear"
"i'm always willing to state the obvious- just for you though"
later on when it's far too dark to read or sketch anymore, you both head back inside and he stops you as you put away your sketchbook and pencil
the flickering candles and dim lighting of the indoors suits his eyes well too you can't help but notice
"do you really want to paint me- my eyes?"
"are you offering?" the way you said it with so much hope and excitement made him feel bashful in a new way he hadn't felt with anyone else
how could he ever turn you down when you seem so excited?
short answer: he couldn't
even shorter answer: why would he?
-x-x-x-
a/n pt.2 : i'm out of practice okAY
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lucyyygg · 6 months
Note
Hi. I just want to somehow make catharsis about the whole Chenford break up going on and listen other takes on it.
Maybe Im just a girl going through Mercury Retrograde being delulu not wanting to aknowledge they are over. Having said that:
I just know this is not the end for them. But not for plot reasons that we are all speculating. I mean sure for plot reasons is necesary for Tim to get his shit together before taking the next step with Lucy (Eric said in his interview that Tim loves her and its seen in the lie detector scene and all the Tamara moving out storyline that has been going since last season they are sure heading to moving together). Also sure Lucy has suffered many things and is interesting to see her next steps.
But I just know this is for marketing reasons. They need the show to be renewed for another season and a massive cliffhanger like this one when there's a 3 weeks break between episodes where they know people will be engaged on it is a good way on getting that renewal.
They know people still watching the show because Chenford. They have stated they are endgame. But they are producers and writers and plan things ahead in order to keep the show going. Is just trust the process and the fact that they work on this and know what they are doing. I have seen many shows (most of them from ABC) to know they give the fans what they want bc in the end is a product that is sold and know that not doing something your target audience wants equals not product to be sold.
Also, even though Melissa and Eric had said that there are some things coming on Tim and Lucy on the season finale and blah blah blah. They are putting a lot of effort on the breakup promotionally speaking. The interviews released the second the episode finished, the TikToks from Melissa, the whole ice cream promo with letters to the cast about the breakup and they laughing and making jokes (also like the ig account still saying Chenford stan account) is more clear is about making the people engaged and furthermore, making the network renew the show for season 7. They are actors and know they must keep a good relationship with their fans (I mean if you make something that upset your fans then how would you keep getting called to act if you dont have people watching them for you and other actors can), what Im saying Is they are laughing and all of this because they know how it ends and know they end in a place where fans will love it, if not they are basically bullyng us lol.
So long story short: just keeping my peace of mind knowing it is just marketing. By the interviews we know somehow the season finale lets them in a good place, so if season 7 comes maybe we got time to see them making up with more time and development (things this season had been rushed bc the strike, not only here but in most shows) and if there's not season 7 it will end up with Chenford with a sort of an open finale where all points to them giving it another chance in their inmidate future.
Hope i made myself clear. Just wanted to vent haha. And lets chill and cross fingers for season 7 and an Oscar for Melissa and Eric because that break up was so CHEFF KISS like girlll I have felt that pain too.
Hi! So glad to have you vent in my inbox lol!
I know that this isn't forever and I can see why they did it. I hope more people can also think about that as they calm down and as the rest of the season plays out. I'm seeing a lot of negative opinions right now and everyone is entitled to how they feel but the writers aren't dumb, they know what they're doing.
Something like this happening near the end of the season will bring attention to it and hook people in, since they'll wanna watch to see it resolved. Even though that's not gonna happen til season 7 unfortunately.
Also a lot of people criticizing the writers need to realize that the show isn't for them specifically lol. Not targeting anyone but these are commonly used tropes in tv for a reason, they aren't a personal attack. I can think of 10 ships off the top of my head that this happened to. It's a common thing, getting into a relationship that has been anticipated for so long but life gets in the way, so you need to work it out individually, then together happens a lot. And pretty much all of them come out stronger on the other side.
I'm crossing my fingers for season 7! I'm not really worried about cancelation since its rating are pretty good and it's a big streaming hit, but anything can happen unfortunately. Still, I think we're safe lol.
I still haven't rewatched the breakup scene in full because it HURTS. They both killed it but Melissa's face and inflection on her voice makes me wanna curl up and die its so heart wrenching 😭😭.
Thanks for your ask lol I love big, long rants (that sounds sarcastic but I promise it's not)
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ellecdc · 7 months
Note
every single remus version you have written so far is about to catch these hands cause wtf.
I MEAN COME ON JUST FUCKING BE HAPPY ITS NOT THAT HARD??
anyways loved the new chap and i love rem being a stupid fucken doofus AND SIRIUS PUTTING HIM IN HIS PLACE YES BABY
also i feel as though amelia is gonna be a big fucking problem for my whim baby. i swear if she hurts her im going to riot. pitch forks and torches.
i want more sirius putting people in their places (shit is hot 🤭🤭) hoping it’s amelia next🫣
(i do feel a little bad though, it’s either she’s going to be a problem or she’s going to be extremely hurt AND I DONT LIKE SEEING GIRLS HURT NO NO)
anyways i think the reason why your stories work so well is because you mesh ALL the characters into the story, it’s never just r and said character ITS A WHOLE PRODUCTION AND A HALF👏👏
ohhh i can’t wait for the angst between james, sirius, and rem and then heart wrenching angst between rem and my whimsical baby😮‍💨😮‍💨
(also a little note i saw u post abt the drink snob: if you are willing to finish the story (which is fully up to you, no one can force you to do anything) i think you can start it off with r finally starting work in the restaurant! i think the interview process with rem’s parents would be so cute, while she learns stuff abt him cuz his mom is adorable and won’t stop talking abt her kids (all of them) maybe she gets a little peak -fully accidental- abt what it is rem and the little gang is actually doing. just a few ideas for you lovely, it’s all up to you and what you feel comfortable in doing! 🫶💗)
YES YES YES THERE YOU ARE - everytime I post a new chapter/piece I literally sit at the computer like:
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….waiting to see what frostooo has to say 💃🏻
I know rem is such a dumb dumb it was getting hard to write cuz he was pissing me off so much (even tho it’s my own damn fault??)
I was like, okay, someone’s gotta humble this man, and who better than my fellow November Scorpio??????
I think someone needs to look at Amelia and be like “………babes…..why u letting this mans treat you like this????………….be better” like which friends of hers are letting her hopelessly pine over this dumpster fire of a man rn???? Bad friends, she needs new friends.
Also, I’m the kind of person who like, the thing I’m most proud of/what I brag about to people is my relationships. Like my relationship with my friends I’ve known since I was 4, being an aunt & godmama like these things are the coolest thing about me so I wouldn’t be who I am without my friends AND THATS HOW OUR BABIES ARE?!?!? Sirius is who he is cuz of his friends, and James, and Remus etc etc - they are integral to the story because they’re integral to the characters!!!
I’m going to mood board about drink snob - usually I have an idea of how I want a story to end before I write it (I knew the ending of CBBH and of AMWAP before I knew what happened in the middle), so it feels weird to write without a plan. (Omg, a plan, I sound like Remus)
Okay bye love you drink lots of water today 🫶
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random-meme-bot · 2 years
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Ok so there are some ideas about Epithet erased that have been bouncing in my head after reading Prison of Plastic and I just need to get them out
(Spoilers so beware)
Ama just be clear on this, I think Marty (Molly's & Lori's Dad) was the reason for the fire on the old "Blyndeff Toy Emporium", or at the very least the reason the fire alarm didn't activate.
So first of, let's start with what im more confident:
The Fire alarm
Marty's main job on the store is supplying it with toys to sell, the way he does this is by building them himself.
I believe the guy either was missing some pieces for some project he was working on and just took them from the fire alarm thinking "Eh, I'm sure it's not that important"
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Or decided to do a little "peek-in" to inspire himself, either breaking it on the process or jut not being able to put it back together afterwards.
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I mean, if he broke the thing he would just thought nothing of it and then forgotten about it
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None of the other members of the family would have done something as careless as break the fire alarm and don't say anything, especially Molly or Calliope since they are the most responsible members of the family, and Lori has no idea why the fire alarm didn't went off
And, I know what you're thinking.
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"The fire alarm could just be defective, or the battery could've just runned off, not everything has to be because of someone"
And while yes, it's true that things like that coud happen, I don't think Jello would take something as important to the plot as "They couldn't escape from the fire in time because the fire alarm didn't activate" and just brush it off as "It didn't activate because it just so happened to be broken, bad luck" (My source's are his streams playing Ace Attorney Investigations, so take it at your own risk)
But this is just a small part of the biggest picture, let's discuss the Phoenix in the room:
The cause of the Fire
Ok so first of all, I don't believe Lori was the "Firestarter", while her Epithet activating during the night without her knowing makes sense, there are two things that shows that, that wasn't the case
First of all, that night she was sleeping on a dream bubble.
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Which means the fire couldn't have come from her, when shes on the bubble everything she creates appears on the bubble, on top of that everything created on the bubble disappears outside of the bubble (as apparent by Trixie, Feenie & Rick going back to normal form outside of the bubble)
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Even if that wasn't the case, I doub the fire could have gotten out of the bubble on its own since the bubbles are indestructible for anybody except Lori, Molly (and sometimes Rick)
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As for who started the fire, I'll admit I don't have that much in terms of concrete evidence, and the few I have point to (unsurprisingly) to Marty.
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Let's analyze the few things we know, at some point in the night a fire started somewhere on the "Blyndeff Toy Emporium", the fire alarm was not working that day so we can assume that someone gott awakened by the fire and alerted the rest, after being alerted, Molly got into Lori's room & tried woke her up from her bubble, event that caused her to discover her epithet
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after Lori was woken up they both got out of the house, after some time Marty came out with Calliope on his arms.
There's a lot of information missing since we only know Lorelai's version of the story, but It doesn't add up doesn't it?
How coud Molly have gotten into Lori's room, awoken her epithet & gotten out before Marty & Calliope?
This is especially weird if we assume that like most family's both parents were sleeping on the same bed or at least the same room, meaning they would've been alerted at the same time.
Ok let's put all the pieces together and finally unveil my theory.
WHAT MIGHT HAVE HAPPENED THAT DAY
Marty Blyndeff had gotten himself the bestest of toy's ideas, "A Robot toy" he had been working night & day on it and it was finally finished! He just needed a battery to test it, he got out of his workshop and started looking for something that really didn't need the battery, he's eyes stopped on the Fire Alarm,
"Of course" he tough "That thing is just there for aesthetic, I mean if it is sooooooo important, why would there be only one on the whole store", he took the battery out of the Alarm and then used it to Power his creation.
The little robot made some weird noises and moved a bit before releasing some sparks which led to it catching fire, maybe going from simple wood toy's to complicated robots was not as good as an idea as he initially thought, this was bad since most of the things in the workshop ware also made out of wood, thinking quickly [For maybe the first time in his life] Marty grabbed a nearby bottle of acetone to try and put off the fire, after all, all liquids are strong against fire right?
Acetone as the flammable liquids that it is only made things worse, it made it so the flames started to spread faster, the fire had gotten to the rest of acetone bottles and other flammable chemicals causing a huge explosion that knocked Marty unconscious, the entire workshop and part of the store was now covered in flames that were quickly expanding.
Molly Blyndeff was sleeping on her room as usual when a noise woke her up, she had always been really susceptible to sounds due to her great hearing, she opened her eyes and found her room getting filled with thick black smoke, "FIRE!" She shouted, she came out of her room yelling "MOM, DAD, LORI!" she heard some noises coming from her parents room so they were awake, but she was more worried about her sister's room, no sound was coming from it, "WHAT IF SHE WAS HURT OR WORSE?!" Molly entered her sisters room, and found one of her sister's dream bubble surrounded by fire, "WOULD THE BUBBLE PROTECT HER?!" Molly didn't know, she started punching the sphere with all her force as she screamed "LORI WAKE UP, PLEASE!" a green aura started to emanate from her hands and the walls of the bubble started to disappear revealing Lori's bed with her on top still sleeping, without thinking it twice Molly grabbed her sister and started shaking her, "LORI PLEASE! WAKE UP!" Lorelai woke up just to find her sister crying, shaking, screaming, and glowing, that last part would had caught her attention a lot more if it wasn't for the flaming inferno that was surrounding them, they both got out of the room, got down the stairs and escaped the store.
While this was happening Marty woke up, he was on his workshop, his head hurt and he couldn't remember much, he was finishing his Robot toy and something happened...? It didn't matter, what mattered now was getting away from all the fiery situation he had found himself into, he got up and started to make his way out of the workshop and up into the middle floor of the store, he made his way to the stairs and started to go up into the bedrooms, he had important things in his room that he didn't want getting burned, when he opened the door he found his wife laying unconscious om the floor, the building was collapsing, there wasn't enough time to save both his wife & his stuff, so he picked up his wife and escaped the building reuniting finally with the rest of his family.
Conclusion
Here's my (more or less plausible) theory of what happened that day, It's very rough as the only version of the events we have is Lorelai's which is not much, we also don't know how their old toy store was in terms of architecture so I kinda just had to assume it was similar to the one they have now and use the layout of that one.
I'm sure this is how it happened?
No, not in a million years the amount of information I had to fill up to make that Fanfic Theory makes the story as a whole pretty unreliable.
I'm sure Marty is the responsable of the fire and the fire alarm not working? Yes, absolutely, maybe not the fire though as again, not much prof, but the fire alarm was definitely Marty's thing.
So anyway, here are my ramblings about Epithet Erased Prision of Plastic, please give me your opinions on this theories and the book as a whole I'm really interested on what other people think.
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iheartcake123 · 2 years
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Hello I was wondering if you could write a fic about Kim cheol-soo from all of us are dead? I don’t see any content about him at all and I thought he was pretty cute in the show. If you can maybe some fluff and him saving the reader from the zombies? I completely understand if it’s to much to ask. Have a good day ^^
hii, here’s your request <33 im sorry it’s taken so long but i finally got around to finishing it off :)) enjoy!!
☁️rooftop-kim cheol-soo☁️
warnings: zombies
Masterlist
you limped as you made your way up the stairs to the rooftop. you didn’t know how you’d made it so far but you must’ve had a guardian angel as you’d always escape danger just in time.
however, now you were struggling. zombies were closely catching up and you just wished that the roof top door was unlocked for when you got there.
“get off me!” you cursed using your good leg to kick a zombie away as it attempted to grab at your leg and drag you down.
thankfully it had worked and you managed to continue to the rooftop. when you got to the top unfortunately, the door was locked so you started to desperately push your body into the door while yelling in case someone was on the roof.
“help! is anyone on the roof? please” your voice towards the end was a whisper.
you thought this was your end.
“please! if anyone is there open the door!” you pleaded as you then began to prepare yourself for your end.
as you closed your eyes, ready for the zombies to rip into you. however, instead you felt an arm roughly pull you backwards.
when you opened your eyes, you realised you were on the rooftop. the rooftop door was blocking the zombies from getting to you and stood right in front of you was cheol-soo.
you recognised him from your science class. you’d both been paired up on projects before and were casual hi and bye friends. you weee so glad to see him.
“cheol-soo!” in an instant you wrapped your arms around him and he awkwardly hugged you back as tears began to fall from your eyes.
“thank you so much, there’s so many of them and they almost- god thank you so much” you explained, relieved that he had saved you.
“it’s-its okay, you’re not hurt are you?” he pulled away from the hug and you wiped your eyes dry as best as you could.
“my leg” you pointed to your swollen ankle “i twisted my ankle after falling up the stairs”
he starred down at your ankle and almost gasped. it was a bad.
“sit here” he then helped you to one of the corners of the rooftop where you sat leaning against the wall.
when you sat down, that’s when everything suddenly hit you. you started to process everything.
“this can’t be happening” you whispered in disbelief.
“huh?” cheol-soo knelt down beside you.
“this can’t be happening. z-zombies should only be in movies..not in real life. i mean how did this all start and what about my- oh my god my family” your eyes began to tear up and cheol-soo placed a hand on your leg.
“im sure they’re all fine. try not to think about it, you need to rest” he then awkwardly moved his hand to your cheek, rubbing small circles which brought you immense comfort.
after doing this for a couple of seconds he then stood back up.
“im just going to finish up this sos sign” he said before walking over to the scrap wood and metal that was in a pile.
with a nod you closed your eyes and tried to get comfortable but, nothing seems to work. the wall was too hard, it was too cold and every little sound made you flinch.
with a sigh you opened your eyes again to see cheol-soo adding the final pieces of the sign to complete it. you attempted to stand up but after putting even just a bit of pressure on your ankle, your body fell bad to the floor with a thud.
when cheol-soo heard this, he immediately went to check on you.
“try not to move, you need to rest” he complained looking down at your ankle again.
“i know, i just can’t sleep. it’s freezing and every sound just puts me on alert mode. not to mention the wall isn’t comfy” you pouted “actually would you be able to sit next to me, i’d feel safer. it’s okay if you don’t want to but i just thought..”
you didn’t know how to finish your sentence and you looked away from cheol-soo who now let out a shy smile.
“of course i can” he nodded his head and positioned himself next to you.
you let out a smile and slowly rested your head on his shoulder and curled up into his arm as his warmth radiated on to you.
“you’re so warm, thank you” you smiled happily closing your eyes and cheol-soo rested his head onto yours.
a huge smile on his face as both of you enjoyed each others company in what felt like the end of the world.
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I’m curious about your writing process. Like do make outlines from start to finish, or plan things out as you go. I love how your writing feels so well written and planned out, like everything you write has some sort of payoff. Anyways sorry for rambling😅, have a good day❤️❤️❤️❤️
ooo this is such a great question! my long fics generally tend to be pretty planned out. but ive been learning recently that having less of a plan and just jumping into a story is actually better for my motivation and for plot points happening organically. part of the reason i tend to write competition fics as opposed to other settings is that the structure of total drama allows me to do less planning and rely on what comes up spontaneously because i already have a framework im operating within. so i tend to plan out elimination orders and general arcs for characters.
i would say of my long fics, slippery slopes is the most planned out, amicus curiae is somewhere in the middle, and reprised and the courtney time travel au are the least planned out. i had very specific scenes i wanted to have happen each chapter of slippery slopes and i think part of why it's a strong fic is because a lot was planned out in advance (like, months and months in advance). but there were still moments that surprised me (alejandro and courtney's friendship was never meant to happen) and caused me to deviate from my plan for the better.
i started writing amicus curiae on a whim and i got 40k words in before i realized that the courtnemma relationship would work way better if they actually knew each other before the fic started (originally they met on the show). it was a really good discovery but unfortunately meant i had to rewrite ~20 chapters to fit that which was a pain in the ass but ultimately for the better. amicus curiae was a fic where i was really figuring things out as they went along (i changed who the winners would be 3 times) but i still had a clear idea of the personal journeys i wanted the characters to go through that weren't necessarily reliant on the competition/structure (ask me about this more once im able to talk without spoiling it!!)
the courtney time travel au is a serious experiment in that its very focused on interpersonal relationship and yet almost no eliminations are planned out in advance. everything is very spontaneous despite being a rewrite of the first season both for me and for courtney in the fic. which i think helps it not become too rote! but i also have no idea how things are going to go from point a (the basic straining chapters, which i just finished) to point b (the post finale chapters).
im writing reprised for fun as something low stakes and silly (because i love amicus curiae but its angsty enough that writing it can be emotionally exhausting sometimes) and i have the elimination order decided and very basic arcs/plot points for some of the characters but its open ended enough that i can have fun with it! and it probably wont end being one of my more narratively strong fics but that's okay <3
one of my more recent struggles with amicus curiae has been spending so much time developing the alenoah and courtnemma relationships that i find myself going aaaaa!! how am i gonna get these two together before the fic is over?? its really taught me to have a clear idea of when character dynamics shift, especially for romantic ones that are going to get together sometime throughout the fic. i love pining but i find pining for almost the whole fic and then only having the characters get together and be in a relationship for like two seconds at the end to be somewhat narratively unsatisfying.
so yeah i would say i try to plan out the character & character relationship arcs and i use the structure of competition fics for framework, but i don't plan out many details/specific scenes before i write them unless they pop into my head and then ill write the idea down and come back to it when its time to write the scene. i find that not planning out conversations/interactions can make dialogue much more organic when i write it on the spot and can lead to new discoveries about the characters.
as for payoff, i tend to go for the general rule of chekhov's gun: if there's a gun in the first act, it has to go off in the third act. basically, i try not to introduce any narrative threads if i don't intend to resolve them in some way later on in the fic. for example in slippery slopes, i introduced my version of alejandro's family issues with him alluding to his oldest brother carlos distancing himself from his family, and in the last chapter i have carlos showing up for alejandro and helping him get away from his family as well. pretty much as soon as i started writing alejandro thinking about carlos, i knew carlos would be there for him in the end.
planning things out can be super helpful and i certainly couldn't start writing a long fic without having any kind of plan, but ive found that having suuuper detailed outlines and knowing every little thing that's going to happen in advance is personally stifling for me as a writer and kills my motivation. so im learning to strike a healthy balance.
thank you so much for this ask! i love talking about writing!
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molloytheboy · 3 months
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tagged by @dead-ghost-walking to answer these fun fic writing questions!
How many works do you have on AO3? 42
What’s your total AO3 word count? 138,556
What fandoms do you write for? currently just the Vampire Chronicles but when I first got back into fic writing in 2020 it was Dragon Age
What are your top 5 fics by kudos? Does it feel like a dream, Mr. Molloy? | Next to Never | The Fight | Come As You Are | If This Be Nothing
5. Do you respond to comments? Usually yes! I love receiving them so I try to encourage it as much as I can by interacting <3
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Probably gotta be the fic where I killed Louis (which I do still plan on finishing btw)
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Holy Ground :)) this one is sickeningly sweet tbh i was in serious need of some fluff when I wrote it
8. Do you get hate on fics? only very rarely. basically never happens now that I only allow comments from people with accounts
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? yes. all kinds. all of the kinds. VC Kink Week 2023
10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? not currently but crossover crackfic was how i started my fic writing career back in high school. craziest was a roleplay with my bestie that involved characters from Naruto, Samurai Champloo, DNAngel, Fruits Basket, Gravitation, and Fullmetal Alchemist
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? not to my knowledge. nice thing about writing for such a small fandom someone would probably notice and notify me pretty quick
12. Have you ever had a fic translated? no
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? yes
14. What’s your all time favorite ship? idk if i can pick one definitively but its a VC ship for sure. its kind of all of them tbh all the main canon ones. i cycle thru obsessing over each of them depending on the fic im working on. if i was forced to choose at gunpoint i would go with Nickistat
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? hate the phrasing of this how dare u make me face my demons. I will finish all of my wips i will break the cycle and then i will be free and never again be plagued by thoughts about the Characters in Situations. i know this sounds like a cop out answer but i genuinely with all my heart believe that i will eventually get to all 17 of my wips this is simply the extent of my hubris
16. What are your writing strengths? dialogue i think. and smut idk can smut be a strength. tbh i haven't received a lot of constructive feedback on my writing outside of fan spaces so i dont feel qualified to answer this
17. What are your writing weaknesses? over-explaining/over-describing characters actions and motives and emotions in a scene. i feel like this is smth that doesnt come across in my final drafts as much anymore bc ive been actively working on it but this is the thing i consistently struggle with during the process. also i tend to be kind of lazy with research which isnt the best quality to have when you write mostly in historical settings. but with fanfic i feel justifed in only spending one hour instead of three reading up on life in 18th century Paris since i do have a life to get back to at some point. if i was writing for publication i would try harder
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I do it, poorly. almost exclusively French in this fandom, and a little Italian. I do my best to check multiple translation sources (from real speakers if possible) and find example sentences to base my grammar on. but again, this is a hobby so I don't hold myself to the same standard I would if I was doing it professionally
19. First fandom you wrote for? pretty sure my first fanfic was that crossover i mentioned earlier so. all of those
20. Favorite fic you’ve written? oh boy. hold on gimme a sec. ok i think its Against All Odds rn. i was at the top of my game when it comes to Loustat banter (had recently reread the first 3 books) and its very tight and compact and cinematic im still really pleased with it 2 years (??!?!?!?) later
tagging @nightcolorz @butchybats and anyone else who wants to! u can say I tagged u <3
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lightshielded · 1 year
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hello friends. sorry i haven't been around. everytime i think things will get quiet for me they don't. and the one time it did the mageseeker lore gave me whiplash and i had to spend like 2 weeks processing. making 4 champions lores non-canon and having jarvan become the villian then good guy again of demacia in the space of a couple in lore months really sent me around the block.
(i think riot regretted what they were doing with the other champions of demacia and wanted to back track it in lore but it just felt kinda meh. again ill work on my own head canons to smooth it out so come at me sylas rper i love you and will make it work.)
but i have some good news: 1) im in the final round of a set of job interviews for like my dream job. super exciting my interview is on monday! and 2) i finish my DVM in just 9 more weeks! how cool is that?! i made this blog back when i was in my undergraduate degree and now i'm almost a dr! thank you all for helping give me a creative outlet to keep me sane!
now one strange thing has happened - riot wants to unify all the worlds lore into one, seemingly using arcane as a base. this is very strange for demacia as in arcane the rune wars appear to only have occurred in the last 300 years which of course makes demacia VERY compressed in its 1000 years history to 300 years. for now i'm going to ignore this until they work out how demacia is going to work (since i admittedly don't like this change) but heads up if i have to really overhaul this blog eventually!!
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ive noticed while yr output has slowed down a bit, more shamelessly "inspired" artists have cropped up on ig. im not someone who thinks styles just suddenly are made by one person, but its obvious tht this strain traces back to you. do you care about any of that or feel a pressure to 'claim' the style and not be left behind? or are you someone who just wants to do their best to focus on making what they want, and then leave others to eventually give credit if they want?
Ok finally replying to this one ive had this one on hold here for Like a yr bc my feelings on th matter change all th time but lately it's been a lot of acceptance a& Just like feeling good about it that anything i made was important enough to anyone to make something inspired on it be it blatantly or not im just happy to inspire people like that i still have silly feelings abt it sometimes bc i feel its so ridiculous that id make something so apparently inspiring and appealing for a specific pocket of people on the internet when i was just making art for myself but i guess thats always how it happens right and sometimes but not that often anymore i get angry feelings about it too. I think it's so stupid people way older than me, art students too, just curate what I make and process it into a repeatable format and get clout & sell merch off of this and get job opportunities and become more "popular" than me. I get angry. I get jealous. It's Ok. these feelings are valid and I don't try to repress them but deal w them
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DMs w a friend Like oliver shout out @asphaltfchewinggum said :
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I don't worry abt that falling off part anymore bc i don't feel i will ever be left behind because im always coming up w new stuff and novel ways of expressing my feelings and ppl still relate to it and get inspired by it a lot as long as i stay true iv only been going up as usual since then. I think i still have very unique things to say so I;ll just dedicate myself to saying them. I think every yr my art becomes more and more unique and apparently appealing but I can't ever say that second one for certain.it doesnt depend on me
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☝️some shit from December i didnt finish bc im developing my new style now my new things to say & new truths. Exclusive Leak
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an old Pinterest board somebody made inspired by me(didnt even send it to me, it was supposed to be this private curation thing ig) My output slowed down bc since 2021 my life has changed a lot and become a good bit more fulfilling by itsdelf without the need of art, I miss the energy ihad in 2020 of working all day everyday but at th same time this new ifestyle is very fun and iv felt more assured professionaly and emotionally so its all good. 2022 started college and this year im not going anymore ! i didnt Like it and realized it would stunt my growth so i stopped going. Last year I grew a lot las a person and took on new responsibilities and i think it was the beast year of my life .its moments &moments and i think 2023 im working very hard again hopefully bc i got a lot of shit in check.
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me yesterday morning looking very ugly almost asleep w some food i went out & groggily bought for my girlfriend. I love her soooo much ... she gives me similar gratification making art gave me but she does it by just existing. Not having to prove anything. I'm happy. I think loving is a form of art. I'm not that good at it but i'm learning. Living is a form of art too. I guess what changed is my life stopped being all about myself
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"im still here" and here i remain
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