#i will deny ever making this post

[dniendos]

i love scrolling through the top posts on the pro endo tag and its just filled with people being supportive and loving and downright positive about endogenic and non traumagenic/adaptive systems it makes me so happy i love you pluralpunk, i love you pro endos, i love you those who are freely pro endo, i love those who are lowkey pro endo, i love those who hide their pro endo-ness for whatever reason, i love you those fighting for us and others, i love you those who are comforting, i love you those who are tired, those who are angry, those who are hurting, those in love, those who are happy, all of you and in between i love you pro endos <3

[aesthetic-uni]

Miles “Who’s Morales” vs Gwen “Gwwwwanda” vs Pavtir “You seem like a nice young woman I do not know” FIGHT

[bearloonz]

No one did it quite like wolf 359. While i do think its strengths (individual stories, enclosed metaphors, single episode monologues) may have in part led to the struggles it dealt with in the final season (lack of closure and an increase in narrative struggle with dissatisfying payoff) i genuinely cant care because at its core wolf 359 has such a beautiful way of showing off its characters to you and describing exactly who they are to themselves and to others. It has marvel ass dialogue and a dedicated “cut to a funny contradiction” sound effect and also it has memoria and variations on a theme and they were only reaching out to find out what music was and so so many really compelling questions about humanity and it genuinely struck so many wonderful fucking chords. It’s such an interesting piece of media to me in one thousand different ways.

[oceanwithouthermoon]

yk when i think about it, especially when im watching the anime with people who havent read the manga, the reason a lot of people who only watch the anime and didnt read the manga misinterpreted saikis character so badly is definitely in part because of how damn fast paced the anime is 😭

like that little smile and eye shine frame is there for not even half a second in the anime, so its easier to miss it and assume that he really did only finish those workbooks to get coffee jelly ☠️ its much more clear if you get a good look at how he reacts here that hes just a silly little tsundere and a fucking liar

[multiheadcanons]

DO YOU THINK WE FIND EACH OTHER IN EVERY UNIVERSE?

mikhail did not want to do this.

he has been avoiding the infirmary like the plague, and avoiding its sole inhabitant moreover. it’s too much to even be in there anymore. he can’t think, he can’t reason, he can’t speak, he can’t exist in there anymore without looking like a fool. without feeling his face flush.

he can’t even go in for a visit anymore without his mind wandering. without slipping away into some asinine fantasy of him, and his own doctor.

it feels so stupid. they were fine as friends. they were fine as friends and mikhail got desperate. seemed fritz was too. and then they just… never stopped past the desperation.

and he knows it’s just him. it’s just him who’s feeling this way. the doctor never seemed to skip a beat. even as he wiped the fluids from his face, thanked the russian for a good time, ensured the cleanliness of his uniform and promptly exited whatever bedroom, bathroom, closet, or vehicle they had momentarily commandeered. even as mikhail stood alone, dazed from the flurry of action, the moment they were done the doctor was too, and they were to never speak of it. he never stayed long enough to talk afterwards. it pissed him off that he even thought about aftercare. what would they even have to talk about?

he can’t go in there anymore.

but he has to.

he took a deep breath and shut his eyes. he can’t blink in there or he’ll lose himself.

the swing of the infirmary door was silent. he was thankful for that. it meant he didn’t have to speak until he was ready to. he took stock of the infirmary. clean. organized. a dull scent of chemical, a whisper of blood under that. it smells too clean. he could change that.

but that’s not what he’s here for.

“ah, heavy! lovely to see you here, it’s been a while. you’ve been avoiding me. is there something i can do for you today?” well, there went his element of surprise. and the jab didn’t go unnoticed either. and that desk. that stupid desk. purposefully moved where it was not visible from the door, but the door was visible from its location.

a passing thought of whether the desk was free from paperwork entered mikhail’s mind, and exited just as quickly. he fully entered the infirmary and allowed the door to swing shut behind him. it’s cold in here. he could change that.

but that’s not what he’s here for.

“i need to speak with you. spare me a moment.”

“ah, i’d love to, but i can’t. i’m busy.”

busy? he walked towards the sound of the voice, rounding the corner to see stacks of paperwork.

“…with paperwork. you’ve never denied me before.”

the doctor gave an uninterested stare over his lenses. “well, the lack of denial towards you, specifically, is why i have all this paperwork. so i can’t today. perhaps another time? i’m sure i can fit you in tomorrow—”

“i am not your patient. we need to speak. today. now.” the doctor’s eyes narrowed, and his response was calculatedly slow. the ice they stand on was already melting, and neither seemed to care about the repercussions of falling into the deep.

“if i’ve never denied you before today, why would you continue to press the matter when i insist i don’t have the time? is it a medical emergency? are you dying? i could’ve caught it if you had come in to your scheduled visits.”

“no—”

“alright, then one more day of waiting won’t hurt, will it? i’ll see you tomorrow.” and with that, the doctor was done with the interaction. just that simply.

if mikhail were an emotional man he’d scream. but he isn’t. so he took a deep breath, and looked around. the blue clad doctor may not be an absolute psychopath like his counterpart, but he’s sure the man has something lying around here somewhere.

“should i leave?”

“if you want.”

jesus christ, he hates this man. if this man were to drop dead within the hour mikhail would celebrate. he perused the infirmary, opening cabinets, purposefully not shutting them, moving things out of the meticulous order the doctor kept them in, waiting for a reaction. and nothing came but silence and the scratching of pen on paper.

very well, he’ll up the ante.

he started peering through files. brute forcing the locks on the filing cabinets to go through them. leaving them open. rearranging the papers with others.

“are you having fun over there?” the doctor called out, the scratch of the pen never stopping. a crack in the stone. maybe.

“absolutely.”

fritz was not going to be happy when he realizes the extent of the damage. this is not a new tactic for mikhail to pull when he attempted to get his way, but the absolute decimation of the doctor’s filing system was grounds for death.

this is a hurdle he will handle later. he needs to focus on the task at hand.

“you don’t have a file for yourself?”

“i don’t need one.”

“hm.” this tactic was a no-go. it’s time to up the ante again. he looked around again. “where do you keep your bonesaw?”

“why?”

“just curious.” the silence told him that he probably should look elsewhere.

“if i give you the bonesaw will you get out? you’re distracting me.” oh, that’s perfect. he gave a satisfied smile.

“yes.” he heard the desk drawer open and metal skid across the floor, stopping at his feet. he grabbed it, finding the most comfortable way to hold it in his hands. “thank you, doctor. i’ll leave you be.” a neutral noise of acknowledgement came from the doctor, and with it, mikhail left.

and all fritz could do was put the pen down, and rub his temples. great. now his infirmary was trashed. he had just cleaned it. did he want to know the extent of it? not right now. he’ll explode if he dared look up now.

there wasn’t enough time to stew on it or let it go when something slapped the desk; spattering red across the stacks of paperwork. he did not bother to look at whatever was just thrown. he knows the sight of blood. his eyes slowly trailed upward. and he was absolutely unsurprised to see the russian standing before him, a pleasant smile on his face. the doctor’s eyes twitch.

“are you kidding me.”

“medical emergency. i need your aid.”

“you are an unequivocal nuisance.”

“i have feelings for you.” and the infirmary went silent. they stared at each other. “will you sew my hand back on?”

“get. on. the fucking. table.” mikhail complied. holding his stump out as the doctor grabbed a needle and thread.

“i don’t know why i like you so much. you’re horrible, when i think about it. you’re rude, and a liar, and—” he played up a wince as the doctor began to harshly sew his hand back on. “heartless.”

“shut up.” the doctor snapped. “i can’t focus.”

“really.” he honored the man’s request with a moment of silence. “i have feelings for you.”

“everyone has feelings for everyone. the sky is blue today. i’ve surgically removed two thousand four hundred and thirty seven various organs from a minimum of eight hundred twenty people and four hundred thirty two cadavers before i lost count. is there anything else obvious we would like to state today?”

“you are a cruel bastard.” that got a smirk. he liked that smirk. “i won’t repeat myself. i know you like hearing things repeated. sad little man with bad hearing.”

“i am already at my limit with you.”

“should i leave?”

“i’d say yes, but knowing you you’d just come back in five minutes.” they stared at each other, and the doctor took a deep breath and refocused on his task at hand. “i don’t want to know what feelings you have. we are coworkers. we shouldn’t be having sex with each other at all.”

“that’s an easy exit.”

“why make it hard?”

“ah. right. your need for efficiency. why live at all?” that stopped the doctor. he took a deep breath.

“you have no. idea. what i know about our lives. if you want to live, go. live freely, live wildly, kill yourself in the effort. be my guest. but that’s not what we’re here for and it will never be.” and he continued to sew. “i liked you better as a friend.” he added, softer.

“as a friend?”

“friend, teammate, coworker. whatever you want to call it. i liked you better then. you were happier. we worked better together. we talked more. but this?” he couldn’t help the snort that left him, though none of this was funny. “i— i hate this! i’m anxious, and i’m irritated, and i’m annoyed, all the time! and it feels like nothing helps, because all i think about is you! and you— you can’t help me. because you are anxious, and irritated, and annoyed. and we are fools.” he tied off a knot on the string, and gave the man’s hand a tug to ensure the stitches were tight. but he didn’t let go. “i’m infatuated with you, if it makes you feel better.”

mikhail processed the doctor’s words as he turned for his medigun to finish the job. they didn’t hurt as much as he thought they would, but he also wasn’t sure if this could be considered a rejection. he wasn’t sure why he was so concerned about this conversation.

“so, how do we go back to friendship? is it possible?” he asked.

“to tell the truth, i don’t know.” he said, flicking the medigun on.

the rays were cold. they are usually cold. it felt nice.

“… friends it is. we can be friends. i can treat you better. we can see what happens from there.” he slowly clenched his now re-attached hand, the feeling returning, and with it, the realization that the doctor never let his hand go.

“don’t say you’re going to treat me better. just do it.” the doctor regained the sense to release the man, turning to shut off the medigun and put it away.

“very well… friend.” the doctor could not help the gag that escaped him. and the stare he gave was palpable.

“actually, i hate you. vehemently. get out.”

mikhail laughed. this stupid little man. how could he ever avoid him? he’s never been so humored. and the smile the doctor fights.

perhaps they would be better off friends.

“so. honest question. do we stop having sex.”

“oh, god, no. that’s the best part of the day.”

“so, what, twice a week?”

“…that’s the best part of the day.”

…what kind of friends does the doctor keep? “you are… strange.” and the doctor’s brow quirked. “i like it.”

“aren’t you sweet. clean your mess and get out. i have to finish— ugh. i have to restart this.”

ah, right. that hurdle he said he’d handle later. he really thought this would go differently. but somehow this still ended up being the repercussions of his actions. so he supposes it went exactly how he expected it to. mikhail gave the doctor a final glance as he returned to his desk, and looked around at the infirmary. the files haphazardly stuffed into already overfilled drawers, the papers within the files no longer matching. this will take him a while.

he’s okay with that.

[pluralhottakes]

sometimes pro endos and anti endos should just. chill. interact. don't limit yourself to only interacting with people with morals that are 100% the same as yours. everyone's all "no one is perfect" until the imperfection is that they don't agree with you on something. like no actually flaws aren't just skills people aren't good at, they're also moral things

tl;dr just chatting with people who disagree with you is ok and not everything is about syscourse

.

[mephoj]

nickel and balloon would be so much more interesting if people explored the way nickel became everything awful that balloon used to be but so much worse ironically all in the name of "protecting" everyone from that history repeating. and not softboy tsundere yaoi or whatever is going on in those tags rn

[sulky-cabbage]

I keep seeing people comparing that scene where Nanami sees Haibara BEFORE he dies and him thinking his final moments weren't so bad to Gojo seeing geto (and everyone) AFTER he died as if they're the same thing...

Like sorry but the thing that made Satoru smile before death was Sukuna telling him that he was magnificent and that he won't forget him for as long as he lives😭😭

Yeah this is your man he wanted to be acknowledged by the king of curses yeah he's a freak just accept it.

[daily-dose-of-bucket]

Of course you receive a treat 11 days later because i was dead! Here, have some...

Instant miso soup (20 servings)! Sou's favorite! Or so I heard...

(Kanna tried to match your deer(i think?) energy with the power of cosplay)

[storiesoflilies]

damn, people really be eating up these ai fics…

[dxxtruction]

its probably meant to be somewhat ambiguous but it seems most likely that armand was gaslighting louis so that he didn't trust himself and daniel didn't trust him. he also seemed to basically get what he wanted by instigating a fight and igniting some passion, we see by next ep's start it probably got resolved with sex and absolution. idk the talamasca angle is not as interesting a story

Ask is in reference to this post: HERE

That's cool. You're able to hold that I'm able to hold mine. Interpretations are just that. I will say it doesn't matter whether Armand planted them, or not, because he still ends up gaslighting Louis in the 2x04 argument anyway. It’s effectively gaslighting even if they are telling the truth here as they see it because of how things stack up and what's said.

It is basically how you said, and I'll just go ahead and expand for anyone who might not see it so clearly. Initially, it seems he's more or less trying to just get Louis off his case for the photos, and is willing to throw him, his mental state, and character under the bus, to do so. But Louis already straight up knows him of doing manipulative things, of this exact sort, in the interview before this event even occurred - Namely that Armand is making himself look far more approachable, and better to Daniel, even after they'd both agreed to basically tear this guy to shreds, which makes Louis look worse by default, and goes against what they agreed to both do. Armand has a repeated tendency to fall through on his promises, or promise things, but then take it his own direction when it suits him. In all cases, he does keep obstructing Louis interview, especially when it comes to Daniel, and won't fully admit to it. - this is why Louis' so reactive, among just the fact he has trauma related to being denied his own interiority, fullness, and freedoms, because he's Black, and in society, seen less human. Armand simply doesn't help his case by denying it, even if it were actually his truth that the photos weren't his doing. (Note; Armand has also faced horrific dehumanizing traumas, but in such a differing way I don't think he's able to empathize with the same way Louis been dehumanized in life. I argue a little if Louis is even able to do more than simply hold a lot of sympathy for Armand, as they really are not a lot alike in both their interior and exterior reality. I don't think that sympathy goes both ways often.)

The way he's also keeps behaving like the bigger person in this reinforces the belief Armand wants out of Louis, making him 'see' it, and probably also to Daniel as well who's definitely overhearing this (this particular part has a chance of being unintentional however, if he was only really intending to deescalate, but it still keeps the same effects).

Not only making Louis look like he's crazy to assume it, but denying he'd been doing anything wrong of the sort (by simply at no point coming forward and saying something reassuring of Louis reality along the lines of, 'I have been doing those things, it's just not this, and those weren't my intentions to hurt you with it, I'm sorry' or simply 'okay, I did it, sorry'). As well, it doesn't matter how much Armand's truthful, Louis is someone who necessarily does need reality checks like that, because he suffers from hallucinations, and as he's finding out, memory lapses, and not providing them will make him jump to presume it could be his own symptoms. Also, at one point in the argument, he actually throws out that Louis is insane, if it needed to be anymore obvious. Which is derogatory, if arguably true, though reinforces that Armand's behaviors to 'stop or aid his madness' in prior instances were all a-okay, and all necessary. There's nothing wrong with him, and what he's doing, its all Louis. (His intentions to deescalate, if anyone wants to take on that idea, would've changed by then. It reads as a pattern to me mimicking of the promises falling through.)

Anyway, I'd be saying in my interpretation that him willing to keep this up, even though the photos had nothing to do with it, just shows how much he'd actually use any situation that arises to manipulate/control Louis, and mess with Louis interview, as opposed to orchestrating or planning situations, so he can then also manipulate with it. With all intentions or not, it doesn't really matter. Which makes his manipulation more realistic, honestly. A better portrait of who Armand is tbh.

I don't claim this transcript as 100% accurate, but it's as close as I can get it:

L: Four Fred Steins in the album, four. You made me look foolish. 

A: You just assume it was me. 

L: Well, it wasn’t me. 

A: You sure about that? 

L: Excuse me?

A: I take it back. 

L: Take it way fucking back. 

A: It was probably an honest mistake from the staff.

L: You think I need to be coddled, hyped up, lied to? 

-cut-

A: You’re being Lestat! 

L: Go call on him, see what happens. 

A: A little ridiculous… It's the staff, dear.

L: I’m being ridiculous? You wanna see, you wanna see ridiculous? 

A: No, Louis, it was an honest mistake. You knew it.

L: AAAH

A: You weren’t here- 

L: LA LA LA LA

A: -And more and more of them-

L: LA LA

A: They got through! 

-flashbacks-

A: This isn’t about Lestat! 

-more flashback-

L: You lobbed at Daniel, and disrespected me. 

A: no no no no no no.

-flashback-

L: and over and over and over it’s always the same damn thing. 

A: You trying to trick me?

L: I don’t know I’m just your God now. The abandonment, and aren’t we both cut throat? 

A: You won’t believe me, when I was here. I’m the one who can see! 

L: Alright, first off, first off. 

A: You are insane! 

-fb-

L: You always do this! … We’ll be done with Daniel any day now. Now, knock it off. Its about the record, this is my interview. You hear me? The whole interview that will be heard by me. 

A: In a future that you won’t see!

-fb- 

L: No more! Will you go to speak without asking first. No more! Will you ever flirt around on your years. 

A: Oh, come to Dubai, Louis says, but not me. 

-Then I can’t make out anything-

Sex and absolution I do agree with as well. Like they did do that. I don't think either were expecting it to go that way from the beginning, though, as in neither started or orchestrated a reason for argument just to have makeup sex. That being somewhat normal for them after a big argument like that would not surprise me however. A certain interpretation I take of them having sex after (given the argument) was more that (it seems to me) part of the accusations here is that Armand is 'flirting' to win over Daniel's favor, and trying to get with him? Maybe even back together with him? (Centered a lot around Armand telling him his little love story with Lestat.) If not, just turning him against him. So having sex could reinforce Armand had/has no intentions of leaving, further obstructions wrt Daniel, and/or infidelity. That it's 'me and you' and not 'you and him'. (Which could be the real lie depending on how you want to take it here lmao. And is so bound to fall through because... Armand doesn't keep his promises, not even to himself it seems since he turned Daniel).

Again all interpretations are just that, so long as it can be legitimately supported by the text, and isn't grossly insensitive. The Talamasca just adds to the whole scene to me more than it detracts from it. The outside world necessarily has influenced both of their inside worlds, and further how they interact with each other in both, and is the cause behind of a lot of their behaviors and reactions. Talamasca causing those to erupt sort of points to that. It's real. The whole narrative actually feels more concrete and like there's a world outside who can still influence them if they were the one's doing it. Sometimes I feel people want to center Louis a bit too much in the story, which is fair, it is his story, he has a narrative that should be centered, but it is also other people's story as well. They are playing roles here in it.

Also this is why I really wonder if they'd ever revisit this? I'm a little peeved about it being so hidden tbh. There seems like so much added context and we're denied most of it from the music and constant flashbacks. Fingers-crossed maybe Daniel was recording it? IDK.

[blackmageeljin]

Y'all I am so fucking tired.

Me: vents about being shit on by doctors and struggling with ND symptoms in public

People: UM!!! AKTUALLY THAT IS NOW HOW YOU TALK ABOUT AUTISM! YOU ARE USING THE WRONG WORDS!!! LIKE I AM SO SORRY ITS HARD FOR YOU BUT UR MAKING IT SO HARD FOR PEOPLE WITH REALER DISORDERS :(((((

Me sitting here, not autistic and never once mentioning autism but with several other ND diagnoses that don't get taken seriously because US culture is a shit show and it doesn't exist if they've never heard of it, am never allowed to self advocate and constantly shut out of both NT and ND spaces for not fitting into the boxes people want, staring at the camera like I am on the office on the verge of tears.

Yes internet, people can 'go nonverbal', it is a real phrase for real symptoms and not just a term for someone permanently mute! No it is not 'just a meltdown' and calling an autistic person's symptoms 'just' anything is completely self defeating anyway, and so is saying I can't use the phrase nonverbal anymore because I have shown improvement in my conditions over the course of decades of hard work! I fucking HATE PEOPLE SO MUCH AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[greensaplinggrace]

do you guys remember this. because it lives rent free in my brain every single day. this is still some of the funniest shit I have ever seen. like what do you mean no 😭😭

[kayotic-catgirl]

"why did you start shipping sam and celia so fast—" because alice dyer is never wrong. next question.

[agapestricken]

margaret atwood, alias grace; slightly modified to say 'her' instead of 'his.'

[deadmegumi]

Truly so overjoyed that all the money I put in megumi stocks is paying off im not even that angry about the resurgence of wow he's really gojo's son 🥺 / they're satosugu if they could communicate ❤️ posts. like yeah ok this is truly our yaoi found family kaisen I guess