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mavspeed · 1 year

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something that really pisses me off is this headcanon that ice would have been or was against mav pulling bradley’s papers for the academy.

like i’m sorry but I need some of you to think for a second. this is a man whose jet wash indirectly also led to the accident that resulted in goose’s death and probably carried that guilt for half his life too. this is also the man who was there to watch mav and carole grieve for the brother/husband they lost for YEARS. not to mention he was close to goose as well since they were both at the academy. like he would have wanted to protect bradley just as much as mav did when he made the decision to pull the papers. it’s a dumb moment for both of them but again. 100% they would have both thought they were doing the right thing for bradley.

#this has been cooking in my head and I needed to let it out #actually while we’re on the topic I’m gonna go right ahead and continue #people saying Mav pulled the papers ONLY because of carole’s wish are.... dumb sorry imma say it!#that’s his best friend’s son. the kid of the brother he lost #like be fr for a second mav isn’t infallible he wasn’t being victimised by carole he knew perfectly well what he was doing #and he did it in part to protect bradley! bc he didn’t want a naval career to kill him just like it did his father!#and ofc you can argue that this doesn’t make sense when Mav raised bradley and knew how much he wanted to be a naval aviator #but. again. that is prob why Mav didn’t step in when bradley chose an alternative path #you can recognise your kid’s wishes and ambitions and want them to succeed and also think that it’s gonna kill them #and act on what YOU think is best for your kid #anyway idk why these headcanons specifically irritate me so goddamn much but they do 😭#icemav were good parents but they weren’t perfect it’s like.... okay to admit that both iceman and maverick fucked up #in this aspect of parenting bradley lmao #su.txt #top gun

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coquelicoq · 8 months

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actually natori has some kind of tracking talisman on matoba at all times. that's how he knew where to abduct matoba from for Operation: Kitty Cat City. matoba fully knows about it; it's why he wasn't at all surprised to find a paper doll in natsume's hair after the mask youkai debacle (matoba internally as he watched it fly away: classic mother hen shuuichi-san momence 🥰). because this is matoba "boundaries? what are those? can you eat them?" seiji we're talking about, he's not bothered by this "violation" of his "privacy"; rather, he finds it fittingly clingy (it is, after all, only right that natori should be keeping tabs on him obsessively). sometimes the talisman gets confused and sticks to yesterday's outfit, so he always checks to make sure he has it on the way out the door (his pocket patdown is "keys, lighter, wallet, exorcism supplies, shuuichi-san's cute lil tracker he thinks i don't know about <3"). i wouldn't be surprised if he's figured out how to uno reverse it and now uses it to track natori's location as well. this may not technically be canon but it is probably all 100% true in an important way that transcends canon, we just never hear about it because it isn't relevant to natsume's journey 😌

#matoba: a natori talisman. sure wish i had one of those 😇#<-knows that he has one on him at that very moment and also that natori doesn't know that he knows #convince me that he didn't say this on purpose to make natori sweat. you can't!#in response to him saying that natori side-eyes him and has a dot dot dot speech bubble (my favorite vol. 26 ellipsis btw)#which is exactly how he would react if he had secretly planted a talisman on matoba #and was trying to figure out if matoba knew and was alluding to it!!#check and mate. game set match. QED. i rest my case.#i've connected the dots i've connected them but also i feel like it wasn't that hard. the truth is out there you just have to believe #natsume's book of friends #natsume yuujinchou #horrible exorcists #matoba seiji #f #homura cats arc #my posts #btw i do not think the head of the matoba clan actually does anything so base as to carry keys on his person #he has people for that. he has a driver. he has servants who open the door when they see him coming. what possible need could he have #for such an object #he also may not need to carry a wallet (or equivalent) for similar reasons #but it was the best shorthand i could think of to make what i meant by 'pocket patdown' readily apparent #especially since 'cell phone' isn't an option either since this is set in the 80s #i figure he must have some kind of lighter or firestarter bc he uses smoke to find the source of the locked-room curse #he also seems to carry a brush & ink and various & sundry tools of the trade that i decided to call 'exorcism supplies'#matoba-san drop the 'what's in my purse' youtube video 👀

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puppyeared · 4 months

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i feel shy talking here when i dont have anything worth sharing but i cant help feeling like ive said things in the tags that could be brought up in court

#im joking #i think i just get embarrassed saying smth that most ppl can see out in the open. its like when prey animals are grazing in a pasture #and then they hear a twig snap yk. im like that. but talking in the tags is more comfortable because it just feels more.. hidden?? quiet???#its kind of like how i prefer responding thru asks than DMs.. idk if it has something to do with space or less pressure #i also use these as an excuse to ramble a little abt recent events so. ive worked a little bit on shuffle and prestos backstories ^_^#i was thinking abt giving them a shared past where they knew each other as kids and forgot but i also though hmm.. idk if it would drive th #story i want bc i think itd be better if they bonded over similar experiences instead of the fact that they knew each other before. i get #that reconnecting and reconciling your idea of someone now and then is a good concept but id have to think abt it.. i dont want it to feel #like they owe each other to be friends again just bc they were as kids. ive experienced that a lot and all it did was make me feel guilty #so i think id want to write it as u can be friends with someone who had similar experiences and make u wish you knew each other then #i also know theyd hate each other but idk HOW. i suck at writing conflict so idk if theyd try to make each other eat glass and why #idk if itll ever come up but id also like to see if theres a way i could rationalize why they have animal ears.. normally i say aliens #but ive had an idea for a species and background for that too. although its very abstract and it probably has a lot of holes #smth abt peoples souls attaching themselves to smth they identify with.. although i dont know to what extent like if it can #be called a sona or if it can even be smth mythical like a unicorn or god itself.. its very weird rn #yapping #oc talk

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shibaraki · 1 year

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when it comes to writing it’s good to think of your brain like a muscle. but keeping that line of thinking I wanted to say that as writers we have different skills and that’s okay. so you may be good at short sprints. others do long. some even do marathons!!!!! whether you write 500 words or 5k words or over 20k words it is still valuable, it’s your work and it is time well spent

#does this make sense. who knows #anyway I’ve said it once I’ll say it a million times stop comparing yourself to other people #everything has its place in fandom ok someone out there loves your writing regardless of the length #I know writers who struggle to reach 3k sometimes look at longer fic writers and think man. I wish I could do that #while on the other hand I have long fic writer friends telling me ‘I WISH I KNEW HOW TO SHUT UP’ lmfao #length is not equal to quality. and writing short fic is a skill in and of itself #to build a world with so few words??! ITS HARD !! and people do it!#concentrate on the race you’re in now. you can always work your way up to something new if you want to #you cannot jump from 100 metre sprints to multi lap races!!#I’m sure this has been said before it’s just something I was thinking about #priv

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lightblueminecraftorchid · 7 months

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How to explain that going to church makes me hurt and angry, but not going to church makes me sad and depressed.

#I need to go to Mass. I need to get over the anxiety mental block and just go.#blue chatter #it’s just. I’ve only gone a couple times this semester and every time has left me feeling more empty and hurt than when I walked in #and I know Mass is more than just how you feel. and that it matters that I am there where God calls me to be #I know.#I wish nobody there knew me so they wouldn’t be so worried and ask questions about where I’ve been #it’s like. I cannot possibly explain to my church friends why I haven’t been showing up.#it’s not even scrupulosity anymore it’s just. I can’t be here. I don’t belong here.#and the new priest is trying *so hard*. I’ve been honest with him about how I’m struggling.#but it’s just. there’s something missing. he wants to include the congregation but fundamentally doesn’t understand what that means.#‘everyone is welcome. No I will not make an effort to include marginalized people. they’re welcome bc they can Walk In The Door.’#and I know it’s not that the church has changed #if anything I’d be having the same issues with the old priest. I’m the one who’s changed.#but instead of spending my Sundays with God I’m just. melting into a puddle of Sad. and that’s not good for my faith life.#I need to do *something*. I just. any time I think of trying a new church i feel exhausted.#God please help me.#I don’t know where to go from here. I don’t want to be alone and miserable and losing touch with my faith

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dirt-str1der · 7 months

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Thinking nonstop and reflecting on my past and the people i have talked with whom i now hate. Badly

#Listen to my problems #this is a vent post ->#i cannot believe she had the gall to text me out of nowhere and then delete her text like girl now i am thinking of how much i dislike you #and how worthless you are. like ok. at least you knew to go away #like somewhere out there im certain you will be someones favourite person but i wish you were dead #theres always a word i use when talking about my least favourite person and it is worthless #crazy how a person in real life can have 0 redeeming qualities and not just negative rizz but also be pathetic beyond measure #do you ever think of people you talk to because of circumstance and you get kind of close and you have way more contact than you would like #and you end up hating them so much because you were kind of close. like yeah if we met in passing i would not have despised you #but now i know how its like to be your friend and it is the worst experience of my life #like if we really hadnt talked. if we hadnt shared minimum 2 interests that was a gateway to me learning about the rest of you that is #completely terrible. AND liking the things i like and making it bad is like 😟 how can you like this piece of media if you like it shittily #how do you like the same things as me but in a way completely divorced from the thing itself my god you dont even deserve to be gutted #i understand exile as a punishment now. like no way im using up my state’s resources and facilities for you just get out of here

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prismatica-the-strange · 4 days

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Nope, I'm still crying

#i wish literally anybody from school remembered me #literally only 2 people i was friends with hace talked to me in the past four years #i had the realization tonight that i was never given the choice to nurture most of my friendships #everytime i tried outside of school hours including trying to join clubs my mom would make me leave halfway through then lecture me #that she didn't have time to drive to town and get me #but as soon as my brother wanted to join junior air force she suddenly had all the time and energy in the world to devote to that #so what I'm getting here is that my friendships and interests weren't important enough or worth her time #i wasn't interested in Junior air force 1 cause it wasn't offered to me and 2 I'm not a boit licker #no #i was interested in the video game and board game clubs cause my friends were in them and they WANTED me to join #but after not getting to stay for more than one full session after a month i left the board game club cause it wasn't fair to the others #and i only went to the video game clu once and i don't remember much of it cause i was too anxious that she was gonna flip on me #i kept waiting for her text but instead she showed up at the classroom and made me leave #so when the same teacher that ran the board game club asked if i wanted to join the chess club cause he knew i liked chess #i told him i couldn't cause i was too busy because i didn't want to deal with begging my mom to let me join #she would have said yes but would have continued not letting me stay and being super passive aggressive #I'm not even in the year book for the year my friends graduated #the one thing she did let me do was drama and i hated every second of it. it was genuinely a bad experience for me #yeah i had friends in drama but it's not the same as hanging with my nerdy guy friends playing a star wars ttrpg #the worst part is she gets so defensive when i bring it up and won't give me a reason outside of 'I guess I'm just the worst parent'#it's in those moments i really remember she's the youngest in her family #OH!! it gets worse! she told me when i was younger that she had to be an honorary cheer leader cause HER MOM absolutely refused to #let her join cheer and she's alsways been bitter about it but then she turns around and did basically the same thing to me ffs #at least she was allowed to hang out with people after-school i wasn't allowed to do that either #no. instead i spent the hours after shcool alone most days and my weekends home alone in my room. and she wonders why my social skills are #maybe if I'd been allowed to work on my relationships outside of a classroom i wouldn't have felt so abandoned when everyone i knew #graduated without me. maybe if i didn't have to start back at square one socially again and had people to text and hang with after class #i wouldn't have dropped out. and i think only atlas knows i dropped out. idk how to text these people without spunding like I'm looking for #sympathy when they ask what I'm up to. like yeah I'm stuck at home with an anxiety disorder and unemployed trying to get on disability #prisma vents

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autisticlee · 1 month

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having some sort of chronic pain and tiredness issue and joint problems and whatnot but not knowing exactly what the problem is is really good at leading you feeling like you're faking it or making a big deal out of nothing or making it up. especially if there's a good day where it's not as bad and you can walk straight without limping for the first time in a year. but then you can wake up the next day and can barely walk and wonder why you can't just walk normal. it's hard to not guilt trip yourself into dealing with pain by trying to ignore it and force yourself to walk "normal" all the time

#chronic pain #chronic exhaustion #idk what else to tag #another day of why was lee walking normal and barely pain at work yesterday but then today so much pain and exhausted #wish i knew what was exactly the problem. was diagnosed with “generalized hypermobility” but doesnt do much #not a real diagnosis. basically just a thing to tell me “theres nothing wrong. exercise more” but how???? i keep trying but hurt myself #my job is physical labor and therefore exercise. it hurts. is exhausting. no energy to do more. walking is exhausting #have to focus so much energy on not popping hips out of place and twisting knees and ankles and falling. never hurts less #still think about how failed the heds test by 1 point but had several people with heds or who have close friends/family with it who told me #they think i have it and should go het diagnosed or just ask me if i have it because they recognize the symptoms #and every time i tell them the doctor i saw about my joint issues and stuff denied it they get super confused and tell me to try #another doctor. unfortunately i have to go through my designated health system and they dont have multiple doctors of each specialty #and i in general have no clue how to navigate health stuff or how to advocate for myself and have no help or support system at all so 🤷#anyway. it makes me wonder if i *do* have that or if my floppy bendy joints are just similarly bad and exercise will cure me #and im just bad at it because i have no clue what is right and wrong movement unless someone watches me and corrects me the whole time #and no i wont learn or get better. im so disconnected from this body that i will never learn what feels right and wrong.#still cant even tell when im hungry until i almost pass out!!!!!!! of thirsty!! or even have to pee until its emergency level piss!!!!!!#so no way to tell when hypermobiling joints when exercising or when form is slipping and not correct anymore.#been trying things to get better at that but still hasnt improved at all #what was i talking about......right. dont think ill ever get heds diagnosis since cant pass the test for that. so cant get much support/help #am on my own with youtube tutorials and hoping i dont keep hurting myself wishing exercise will cure me and “good days” become permanent #also why are video tutorials SO HARD TO FOLLOW AND LEARN FROM. im sk bad at it yet everyone tells me its the best and only way to learn but #its SO HARD FOR ME 😭😭😭😭😭 MAKES ME SO FRUSTRATED AND UPSET

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tojiswhore-aventurinesslut · 10 months

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The decline of Yuji's character in shibuya is so heartbreaking. He went from being a happy go lucky teen who felt a sense of moral purpose to just wanting to die. I feel like in a way it mirrors Geto's mental breakdown except Yuji was surrounded by his friends to help him keep going.

Like, I think if Geto had the support that Yuji has he wouldn't have gone down the path he did. In the same way Gojo used Geto as his moral compass in the beginning, Gojo would have been Geto's moral compass. But bc of how individualist jujutsu society is and the nature of their work, Geto didn't have anyone to lean on and the deaths of his friends and the rat race that is exorcising curses took its toll on him.

#i was thinking about a tiktok that makes me cry every time i watch it #the sound is the dog from family guy telling stewie “it's not your fault” over and over #and it's a montage of people telling Yuji it's not your fault #and there's a progression showing his character getting more and more beaten down #and the ending is of him after sukuna massacres everyone and he realizes how many people sukuna killed #he's on the ground crying and the audio is stewie crying saying #“why is it so hard? I never knew it would be so hard”#anyways im tearing up just thinking about it #jjk #jjk spoilers #jjk meta #is this meta?#idk but i have so many thoughts about jjk and i wish more of my friends read it so i could rant #posts #my posts

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justpollux · 3 months

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#i wish i knew how to keep my friends #some of my college friends got together this weekend and i just saw and feel left out #even though i havent spoken to them in almost 4 years #how do people stay in touch when they dont see each other everyday?#i dont understand #i wish i knew how #i dont want to be forgotten but im so used to making myself invisible for safety...

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toonfinatic · 4 months

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"Surely if i move to the city majority of my friends live in i will see them more often! Surely i will actually have a decent social life for Once!" yeah no i literally get no answer if i ask them if we can meet up and now i'm more lonely than ever 👍👍👍 in one of the biggest cities in the country 👍👍

#all the friends that actually seem to want to see me live like 2 hours away #i wish i knew how to make friends. i just dont. people scare me a lot #i have no idea what to do. the only socialization i get is random queer support groups but getting friends from them #is kinda really difficult #because people tend to want to keep to themselves a lot in them. theyre there for support and not friendship #vent #dumb post :(

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elegyofthemoon · 8 months

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idk what i do to make very talkative people like me but i keep befriending the most talkative people which is like YAY COOL !!! bc im generally pretty quiet but also augh my energy.