#i would be so much more invested if they were given more screen time like that

[wastefulreverie]

fixed point

“Would you like to know how much time you have left?” Clockwork asked.

Danny had never wished more that he’d died in something with pockets so he could hide his shaking hands. The endless ticking in the lair—hundreds of hands TICK TICK TICK -ing in perfect sync—had never sounded so ominous.

“I—” his voice rattled his throat, a raw thing “—I didn’t think you gave spoilers.”

With an absent spin of their staff, Clockwork shifted from adult to child and said nothing. Dread hung heavy in the air, Clockwork’s unblinking stare piercing through it all. Danny pointedly did not make eye contact. Instead focusing on the oscillating hands of the wall behind them.

He took a breath.

“Will it make it easier, knowing?”

Clockwork blinked once, face betraying nothing.

Dammit.

He wasn’t an idiot. There was really only one outcome of this conversation. Just as there had been the day he’d first pulled on his jumpsuit, walking—tripping—through the threshold. Life snuffed out of him in less than a second.

He brought his shaking hands together and met Clockwork’s even gaze.

And answered.

Thirteen days.

Seven hours.

Thirty-six minutes.

It was somehow both longer and shorter than he’d expected.

It was also a weight off his shoulders, at least in the beginning. It wouldn’t happen any earlier than the date Clockwork had recounted that night. Thirteen days of freedom. Peace. Liberation.

Because if he thought too much about the length of thirteen days, how three-hundred or so hours wasn’t enough time— it’s not fucking FAIR —he would be swallowed by the crushing anxiety that made its permanent home in his stomach.

So there was that.

He didn’t bother telling his friends. They were already all on edge, but if he could act like all was well he could ease their worries. Because ultimately they were just worried about him, and if he was fine they would be too.

He did, however, make contingency plans. Farewell videos on a USB drive taped to the underside of his bed.

He wanted Clockwork to be wrong. Some nights he laid awake, trying his damndest to find a way off this track. This self-fulfilling prophecy. But there was nothing. That moment had already passed with that stupid news broadcast that had glued him to the couch, shaking, as his parents had shouted and jeered at the screen. Dismissive. Furious. Invested.

They hadn’t noticed when he pushed himself off the couch and stumbled, shaking, to the bathroom to purge the contents of his stomach.

It was a miracle he’d only gotten a two-day suspension for slugging Wes in the face in front of the whole cafeteria. Even more so that no one had pieced it together from that.

No one saw him. But they would. When it was too late.

He couldn’t stop it. But as he didn’t acknowledge it in the waking world it wouldn’t exist. So he reserved his existential crises for when there was nothing to distract him from the looming, inevitable deadline.

He wished he could tell Mr. Lancer that whenever he was given detention that afternoon.

On the night of the twelfth day, he didn’t sleep a wink. No amount of coffee could keep his head above his desk that morning, and so, Danny spent his final hour in detention. He considered skipping. Detention was not the place for everything to come to an end.

But wouldn’t leaving—deviating from his normal routine—up the chances of putting events in motion?

Avoidance was his specialty, after all.

Jazz could write a paper on his coping tactics alone if she hadn’t already. 

At nineteen minutes Mr. Lancer stopped in front of his desk. It was only him and Valerie today, and she sat somewhere three desks behind and to his left of him. Her hair was in a loose ponytail, loose yellow sleeves draped over her hands. The bags under her eyes rivaled his own, even though he was sure there hadn’t been too many ghosts in the past week or so—but then again, he’d not been the most attentive to things on the ghost front lately. It was probably his fault she was here at all. 

“Mr. Fenton,” Lancer said. He forced his head to turn, a feat much more difficult than it sounded. His head felt full of lead. “Is everything alright at home?”

Danny forced himself not to cringe.

“Uh.” He ignored the sound of Valerie shifting in her seat behind him. Great. An audience. “Yes.”

“I’ve noticed you’ve been getting much less sleep of late, is all.”

Now this was a load of shit. Danny’s sleep schedule was normally trash. This current existential crisis was no more taxing than his normal night activities.

Lancer continued. “And your parents have—” he paused, eyes flitting somewhere behind him. “—in light of recent revelations, I just worry, Mr. Fenton.”

Hm.

Did he know, then?

Was this it?

Danny stared stupidly for a moment, forgetting to shut his mouth. And then shrugged.

Falling back on ignorance.

If he was honest, he hadn’t quite expected Lancer to be the one to put it together, but it also made sense. 

Lancer’s mouth thinned. “I know they can be intense, especially with the scrutiny placed on our school now. No one should feel scared to come to school. Or go home,” he said, letting the words hang in the air for a moment. “This is a safe space.”

For a moment all he could hear was the drum of his heart in his chest. And then behind him, Valerie cleared her throat.

“With all due respect, Mr. Lancer,” she said, “nowhere is safe with that putrid ghost hiding among us.”

Danny didn’t turn around. Lancer’s reaction was subdued, but there was a protective fire in his eyes that confirmed Danny’s suspicions. He wondered how long ago he’d put it together.

“Ms. Gray,” Lancer said, “I see your point, but I’m just trying to ease tensions.”

Danny checked the clock.

Seventeen minutes. 

Maybe he should’ve skipped detention after all.

(No escaping the inevitable. No do-overs this time.)

Valerie scoffed. “So what? We let our guard down?” he chanced a glance behind him, and Valerie’s eyes were red-rimmed—from lack of sleep or otherwise he had no idea. “Someone here is a walking weapon and we’re supposed to ignore this? Fenton at least knows he’ll be safe at home, but what about the rest of us? We don’t get to go home to ghost-hunting parents—we have to hold our own.”

Lancer nodded. “I understand. I just think that it’s very frightening for all of us, ghost hunters or not.”

Danny’s voice cracked when he spoke. “Yeah.”

Valerie’s expression softened. “I didn’t mean to make light—”

“No. No, you’re right,” he said. “It’s not safe with Phantom as a student here. Whoever he is.”

She sighed. “Danny, I don’t know what it’s like with your parents, but—”

“But what?” he cut her off. “Because they’re ghost hunters they’re automatically the safest people in the room?” He lowered his voice. “You would think that.”

She froze. “What does that mean?”

Hm. Whoops.

“People don’t know what it’s like, I guess.”

Danny turned back around. Lancer’s stare was dripping with sympathy.

Fifteen minutes.

There was a scrape of a chair, a thud of feet, and a warm hand on his shoulder. Valerie released him just as fast. When he met her eyes, they were as wide as saucers.

“D—Danny,” she said with a note of panic. “You’re cold.”

“Yeah?” he asked.

She took a step back. He hadn’t seen her this scared since they’d been stranded on Skulker’s island together. He could see the realization dawning. 

“Val,” he said, knowing full well what was going through her head, “what’s wrong?”

“It’s not you,” she said, a desperate plea. “I can’t be this stupid.”

He sighed and Lancer stepped between them.

“Ms. Gray,” he said, “now let’s not jump to conclusions—”

“No!” she shook her head. “No, no, no! It doesn’t make sense. You’re—your parents hunt ghosts. Hunt Phantom.”

Danny crossed his arms.

“So do you.”

Lancer looked between them like Danny had announced that he liked eating golf balls. “What.”

Tears welled in Valerie’s eyes. “I trusted you!”

The minute hand inched forward.

Fourteen.

“You trusted me to what?”

Valerie clenched her fists. “Don’t do that! Don’t play stupid!”

“Ms. Gray—”

“I’m not playing.” Danny turned sideways in his desk, facing her head-on. “Tell me what you think I’ve done, Val.”

“Mr. Fenton—!”

“You replaced him. You replaced Danny. How long have you been pretending to be him? To be alive? How can you live with yourself, going home everyday and seeing his parents and—and—acting like you’re still—” she choked on her tears. “You terrorize this town, Phantom. I won’t let you take anything else from me, or anyone.”

Lancer’s eyes were wide. He’d never seen the man so shocked, in such foreign territory.

Valerie, on the other hand, was resolute. There was as much determination in her face as tears.

“I’m still me,” he said. “I died, but I came back. I never replaced myself, however that works. I am sorry, Val. There’s a lot that—”

“Shut up! Shut up shut up shut up! ”

“—that I didn’t mean to happen.”

Lancer slammed his hand on Danny’s desk.

“Can we all settle down!”

It all happened in a matter of seconds. The clock in his peripheral kept him tethered to the moment. 

Valerie reached behind her and pulled a blaster.

A flash of red—

(The minute hand moves.

Thirteen.)

—and a burst of hot pain through his side.

He crumpled forward, his head meeting the linoleum floor with a SMACK and somewhere above him a distant shout.

Everything from his side to his cranium THROBBED and it wouldn’t fucking stop.

(He’d taken hits from Val before. This shouldn’t hurt so much. Why does this—?)

Iron pooled in his mouth. 

Oh right.

Ectoplasm was thicker than blood.

Danny tried to push himself up from the floor but the world spun and his arms gave out below him and he slumped back down to the cold, hard floor.

The floor felt better.

Maybe he would…

Stay here for a while…

***

The television clicked on. A rerun of the six o’clock news.

He didn’t let Jazz turn it off.

“According to a recent report, there is speculation that our local ghost vigilante Phantom might be living among us. Care to tell us more, Lance?”

“Yes, Tiffany.” Lance Thunder’s stupid blonde hair was polished and perfect as usual and he wanted to wipe that stupid half-smile off the bastard’s face. “A ghost ID’ed as Walker —” at this, a crude picture that was mostly just a white blur appeared on the screen “— has publicly announced that our hero is a student at Casper High fooling us, flying under the radar.”

“And as far as we understand, tips from ghosts aren’t verifiable…?”

“Normally, yes, but there is evidence to suggest that—”

“This isn’t good for you,” Jazz hissed. “I know that it’s scary, but—”

“Exposure therapy,” he snapped back. “It’s gonna be the talk of the school anyway.”

She slumped back down onto the couch. “Take care of yourself.”

The door to the lab was thrown open. His parents marched through the kitchen and into the living room, perfectly eclipsing the TV.

“—telling you, Jack. The DNA scans are inconclusive at best. Their so-called ‘experts’ are out of their depths.”

“We’ll show them once and for all. If we can find out which student it’s using as cover—”

“—we’ll expose Phantom for the monster he is!”

His parents disappeared upstairs for the night, but he could still hear snippets of their vows to destroy him. 

He shot Jazz a tired look. “Easier said than done.”

***

Someone was touching him.

Everything on his left burned. Far above him were LEDs and beige ceiling tiles. He wasn’t sure when he’d been rolled onto his back. But he was now, and someone was pressing down on the spot that burned burned burned—!

Blood trickled down his throat.

How many minutes had it been?

How many did he have left?

There were voices, somewhere, but everything sounded like it was underwater. Maybe it was. Drowning would be preferable to many of the other deaths he’d prepared for. Still terrible, sure, but vivisection lowered the bar considerably. 

“—have you done!”

“He’s—” A girl’s voice wavered, quiet. “He’s Phantom. He’s not supposed to—to—”

Wow. Valerie had the decency to sound ashamed.

At least he could die knowing that his killer at least had a few shreds of regret.

(Is it sad that it’s more than he expected?)

“—little first aid.” The pain came in waves, and all Danny could hear was the rush of his stupid heart in his ears. “—expecting shootings in America, but not from a—” 

Just as fast as it came, the world melted away. His last grasp on consciousness slipped away.

(As fast as the click of a button.)

***

Wes had a punchable face.

But hey—that’s what you get for talking to the press. The accusations were written off as pretty baseless, but the damage had been done. He got inquisitive stares now and again. After all, Wes was a joke, but his interview put Danny’s name on the list of suspects and that was enough to fuck his entire life over.

After his two-day suspension, Danny had little opportunity to survey his work. Honestly, more people asked him about how bad he fucked up Wes’s face than whether or not he was Phantom.

(From what he had seen, it was in a perpetual state of purple and that was enough to curb his anger for now.)

So. He had two days off from school.

Danny went to see Clockwork.

Long Now welcomed him with welcome arms, and he broke down into a fit of whines and gripes about how it seemed like everyone was out to get him, that everyone wanted to put his head on a pike. Everyone wanted to ferret out the wolf in sheep’s clothing.

Clockwork shared their sympathies.

“No matter what I do, I just—I’m a wreck. I think someone’s figured it out. That they know, but then I mention it to Jazz or Sam or Tucker and I’m just paranoid and I think I’m paranoid now and—” he groaned. “I don’t know what to do. I’m losing my mind.”

“You do know that it’s inevitable that the truth comes to light.”

He froze. “What.”

Clockwork shifted from senior to adult. “Your paranoia isn’t for naught. It’s a matter of time.”

No. This couldn’t be happening.

He’d figure a way out.

There had to be something.

“I thought nothing was inevitable.”

“Not nothing,” Clockwork hummed. “Often, it is nothing. But not this time.”

Their words shook him to the core. He’d suspected it, sure, but confirmation was—

“I know it isn’t fair.”

“Don’t tell me what is and isn’t fair!” Danny snapped. “Your entire life isn’t—isn’t under scrutiny for everyone. If they know that I’m me, I—”

He pressed his hands to his chest.

He would be finished.

One way or another, someone would find a way to put him on their table.

The government.

His parents.

Maybe someone else out for his blood.

(His body.)

“I can’t see what will happen past them learning the truth,” Clockwork said. “But it is a fixed point. Everything past that diverges, a thousand roads. Timelines. Possibilities. I can’t tell you what to expect. The best, the worst. I cannot offer that reassurance.”

“Oh.”

They nodded. “It’s a lot to take in.”

“I don’t want them to find out,” he said in a pathetic whine.

For a long moment, Clockwork said nothing. If not for the constant ticking of clocks, he would have thought they were frozen. But then Clockwork’s expression shifted.

And they asked: 

“Would you like to know?” 

***

…

……

………

Warbled voices were around him again. Different.

But this time more in focus.

“Sir, Ma’am, if you could leave the room—”

“I will NOT. That is my son, and I am not leaving until someone tells me why there is a HOLE in his chest—!”

And somewhere else, a shriek of sobs.

“We’re transporting him to the hospital, you can’t—”

“I did it,” said that same, sobbing voice. “I shot him. I shot him.”

More people were touching him and Danny didn’t like it oh god no no no —

“—get him on the stretcher—”

“—the hell DID you—”

“—Ms. Gray, you—”

“—no! I want to know why—”

“—securing him, just—”

And now time did slow.

The EMTs lifted the stretcher.

And his face lolled to the side, giving him a clear view of the clock.

The minute hand moved one last time.

Just as:

“I didn’t mean to! I didn’t—he’s Phantom, I didn’t think that it would—!” Valerie, cut off, sobbing. “I’m so sorry, Danny. If you can hear me, I’m so sorry.”

And then there was silence.

Crushing darkness.

***

If he had any last doubts that his secret was out, they were snuffed out when he woke up in the hospital to the pained faces of his parents. Jazz was in the chair to his left, hair mussed up and asleep. His parents’ eyes were red with tears. In his delirium, he also noticed Sam’s backpack discarded in the corner.

How long had—?

“Two days.”

Clockwork appeared before him in their adult form. They swung their staff, looking rather pleased with themselves. Danny then realized the occupants of the room had been frozen as long as he’d been awake. 

“You’re recovering well, all considered.” Clockwork tapped a clipboard on a nearby table. “I will say, I am surprised that we took this route. It is what you might call a ‘spoiler,’ but it’s kinder than most.”

“Is it,” he said, voice hoarse.

Clockwork waited for him to finish coughing up his lungs before speaking again. “They’re handling it as best they can. I won’t say it’s great, but you’re on the way there.”

“I—what happened, again?”

And as he asked, it came rushing back.

Lancer. Valerie.

And paramedics?

Clockwork gave him a knowing smile. “Your teacher called an ambulance. In his panic, he might have let it slip that you were having a reaction because of a ghost weapon, and your parents were looped into the call.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

Danny’s eyes found his frozen heart monitor, time stopped between beats. Below, his mother had tied off the top half of her HAZMAT suit and was wearing a black shirt beneath. He did notice that the contents of her weapons belt were emptied.

He turned back to Clockwork. “How did they take it?”

They shrugged. “Why don’t you ask them?”

“Wait—wait, I'm not ready.”

“How about this? I tell you how much time you have left.” They raised their staff. “Three—”

“Clockwork—”

“Two—”

“Don’t you dare!”

“Time in.”

[noosayog]

004 logical

✧ wc: 2.5k

✧ warnings/content: oikawa toru x reader, no gendered pronouns used but please lmk if I missed any! sfw, angst to fluff, another breaking up making up fic, long distance relationship

✧ GUTS masterlist, regular masterlist

divider from @/cafekitsune

“I don’t think this is working out.” 

When Oikawa hears those words, marred by phone static, he drops the remote from his left hand and his fork from his right. 

“Baby,” he says cautiously, disoriented. “It’s just a few more days.” 

There’s a moment of silence. Oikawa picks up the phone and presses it to his ear. 

“It’s not just that,” you say quietly. “How much longer are we going to do this – not seeing each other, missing calls, postponing flights? Even when we’re talking, we’re not fully focused on each other.” 

“That’s not true,” he immediately protests. 

“Yes, it is. Were you not just watching a game and eating right before this?” 

“That doesn’t mean I’m not fully focused on you.” 

“Yes, Toru. It does.” 

He has so much to say, yet none of it seems to come out. Nothing seems appropriate. 

You sigh again. “Just… stay, Toru. Stay there. You don’t have to fly back to Japan for me. I know volleyball’s important for you.” 

When he says nothing, you go on. “But I hate the way this makes me feel. Like I’m asking you to give up what you love to fly across the globe just to see me for a few days.”

“You’re not. I want to-” 

“Toru.” 

His mouth clamps shut. 

“Last time you came back to Japan, you missed a last-minute practice match with that coach you’ve been wanting to work with. Last time I came to you, I spent 2 of the 4 days I was there alone because you had another last minute volleyball thing. Even when we invest the time to see each other, we’re not really… there.” 

Oikawa knows; he knows. 

“So let’s just… not.” 

He knows, but that doesn’t mean he wants to… not. 

“Just hold on a couple more days, okay?” he asks, trying his hardest not to beg and whimper. “Just a couple of days, and I’ll be back in Japan and we can talk, figure something out.” 

“Toru…” 

“Please, wait for me.” 

“I don’t know if I have that in me anymore.” 

The coldness of your words seize his chest. 

Hearing nothing more from him, you sign off with finality, “Good bye, Toru.”

And the line cuts off. 

–

Today is Friday, the beginning of the 3-day long exchange scrimmages with the visiting Brazilian and Chilean pro teams. Duffle bag tossed on the floor by his feet, Oikawa flops on the couch, downing the remainder of his protein shake. The bright screen of his laptop stares back at him, email confirmation of his flight change there to reprimand him, remind him. 

Your Flight AE344 to Haneda International Airport for Thursday, February 8th has been canceled. 

You’re booked for Flight AE267 to Haneda International Airport for Monday, February 12th! See you soon! 

After you had hung up, he gave you a call back. You didn’t answer. He tried again an hour later, then 2, then 12. He had listened to the line ring, for exactly 20 seconds, 8 rings, before banishing him to your unset-up voicemail. 

Shutting the laptop screen, he picks up his duffle and is out the door. After all, if he didn’t show up to the scrimmage, what would this have all been for? 

–

Friday night arrives, and despite how tired he is, physically from all the exercise and mentally from all the socialization with the visiting players, you wander through his mind. He supposes this is hardly surprising, given you’ve always been his place of rest, regardless of the physical distance, sheer kilometers between the two of you. 

Almost afraid to look, he checks his phone and immense disappointment and an increasingly familiar emptiness fill his chest when he sees nothing from you. 

He tries your phone again. It rings, rings, and rings and there’s no reward, your voice waiting at the other end.

He showers, eats a quick dinner, and meal preps for Saturday’s scrimmage. Busying himself works momentarily, but at 9PM, his phone alarm goes off, reminding him that it’s time to call you. For the past year, his routine has been talking on the phone with you every night at 9PM. No matter where he is, at a bar with teammates, at dinner with friends, or late night practice, he always takes at least 10 minutes to talk to you. 

When the two of you first established this, the agreed upon time was 10PM for him, 10AM for you. The two of you used to compete to see who could call who first. The first night, you called the exact second the clock struck 10. So the next night, Oikawa called at 9:59. Then the following night, you called at 9:58. And it went on until the two of you begrudgingly came to a truce that you’d alternate nights. 

And tonight is your night. 

Five minutes after 9, Oikawa knows the call isn’t coming. 

–

Late Friday night – or technically early Saturday morning – Oikawa lays awake in bed wondering how the hell it all went down the way it did. It hasn’t even been a full year since the two of you started to do long-distance. And he’s still confused. He’s confused because he thought the two of you were doing the best you could be. He’s confused because he’s never even thought about the possibility of not being with you. 

He twists over to lay on his side, facing his phone screen, open at your contact. His thumbs hover over your name for the nth time that night, only for him to flop back on his back, turning now to the other side, your side. It hits him then that he can’t even remember the feeling of you in that bed, the last time you kissed. If he had known that would be the last time, he would've savored it all the more. He’d burn the memory into his nerves, just so he could remember the feeling. Volleyball was all muscle memory; he never thought he’d need to commit you as well. 

Before he knows it, morning arrives. He starts to get ready. 

He brushes his teeth, packs his gym bag, and starts to eat breakfast. 

His legs shake, knees bouncing up and down in a nervous tick that hasn’t shown itself since high school. His laptop screen is up again, the flight ticket once again flashing bright. 

It’s a reminder. Now he knows that when it’s not reciprocal, the distance between the two of you is so much more than 18,000 kilometers and 12 hours. There’s no phone line, no facetime to shorten that distance, even if just by perception. 

Then, it’s a striking thought: a realization that postponing a plane ride those few days could cost him a lifetime.

He dials your number again. 

It rings, and rings, and rings. 

“... Hello?” 

“You picked up,” he hears himself say. 

“Sorry I missed yesterday, Toru.” He knows what you’re referring to without you saying it. “And I’m sorry I hung up… like that.” 

There’s a lot to say, but he can’t do it like this. So he asks, “will you wait for me to come home?” 

“Toru…” your voice breaks with the syllables of his name. He hears the reluctance in your tone. 

“If you want to break up, if you truly want to stop being with me,” it takes monumental effort for Oikawa to even speak of such an event. “Then say it to me in person. I have to know.” 

You’re silent in response. He’s glad you aren’t refusing, saying that the flight, the cost, the time isn’t worth itt. He’s glad that you agree it’s still a worthwhile conversation to have in person. He’s glad you haven’t given up. 

“Wait for me, okay? Please.” 

It takes a few simple clicks and a significant chunk of his savings to do what he does next. 

– 

For the entirety of the flight to Haneda International, Oikawa’s knees bounce, colliding uncomfortably with the seat in front of him. Even with what little affirmation you gave him by simply picking up his call, it brings him little comfort as there’s absolutely nothing he could do for the next 28 hours but sit tight. 

When the plane lands safely in Tokyo, local time of 9PM Sunday, Oikawa charms his way into getting off the plane first. He flashes a weak smile at all the people still in their seats of the plane, before rushing off with only his carry-on in tow. There’s no time to wait for a bus, so he shoves his way to the front of the taxi line, reciting your address as if it hadn’t been over 4 months since he’s been there. 

Every passing moment does little to ease his nerves, exacerbated even up until the moment he arrives at your door. The seconds pass in loud silence, the hollow sound of his knocking ringing in his ears. 

All the white noise fades, though, when the door opens and reveals you. No matter that your eyes are red and swollen, no matter that you’re wearing one of his old ratty Seijoh sweaters, no matter that the two of you are supposed to be breaking up.

“Toru,” you breathe. Oikawa forgets you’re supposed to sound like this, not the distorted, muffled imitation of your voice he hears through the phone too often. Yet another addition to his growing list of realizations. 

“What are you doing here?” 

He doesn’t know where it comes from, but a single heave of a laughter bursts from his chest. “I told you I wanted to see you, didn’t I?” 

“But… your flight wasn’t supposed to arrive until Wednesday.” You’re cautious and he hates that. He wants you to be uncaring of the emotions you show around him, to jump into his arms and forgive him. He wants it back. 

“I changed my flight.” 

“But volleyball…” 

“That’s the thing,” he starts. “I think that’s probably one of the things I never made clear to you.” 

You look at him, confused. 

“Can I come in?” 

It stings when you instinctively fold your arms over your chest protectively, eyes briefly leaving him to look at the ground. 

 “Will you let me in?” he tries again. 

You look back up at him, moving to the side to let him in. 

When the door clicks shut behind him, the first thing Oikawa does is wrap you up in his embrace. His arms engulf you. He forces his hold to be gentle, on the chance that you push away. You don’t, so he holds on tighter and tighter, until you squeak from the pressure. He thinks he mumbles an apology, but he’s not really sure because all he registers is your arms coming up to grab his sweater. 

It’s not enough. 

You let him just hold you, for how long, he doesn’t know, until you finally squeak out his name. He reluctantly pulls away and starts talking, as if he wants to get the talking part over as fast as possible so he can pull you right back in again. 

“The thing I wanted to tell you,” he continues from before. “There’s no comparison – between you and volleyball, I mean.” 

“Toru, you know that’s not true.” 

Yes, it is,” he insists. “I’ve never seen volleyball as something that takes away from time that belongs to you. Every time you come to see me, or I go to see you, or when I push a flight, I’ve always seen that as just a… postponement of our time together, never that it would take away from it.” 

“Toru…” you push further away. 

“But, I think I get it now. I get that phone calls, video calls, text messages can’t be a substitute. I know because I almost forgot how your voice sounds outside of a phone and because I can’t accept us breaking up through a screen. And even more so because I can’t live off of the memory of how you feel.” 

When your gaze softens, he knows he got it right. It only took all this time for him to understand what you meant when you said things weren’t working; it was never about a postponed flight. 

“I’m sorry it took me so long to get it.” 

Your palm comes up to cup his face. Your thumb brushes a wet spot on his cheek. “Oh, Toru. I would never make you compare, I thought you knew that.” 

“I know,” he says. I know. And he does. 

“Sometimes, I just need to know you miss me as much as I miss you. I know you love volleyball,” 

“I love you,” he interrupts. 

“I know you love volleyball,” you continue. “And I would never want you to feel like you had to give any of it up for me. I just need to know that you feel what I feel too.” 

His hands at your waist squeeze, like he’s reassuring you that he does. 

“I know that you won’t be playing in Argentina forever. I was prepared to deal with long-distance for as long as it takes for you to be ready to come home. But-” 

He shakes his head like he doesn’t need you to say it. 

“No, let me say this. But, sometimes it felt like you were settling for how we were. Then… when you postponed the flight, I guess I was just bummed because I was so excited to see you. But you acted like it wasn’t a big deal.” 

Yeah, he did, didn’t he. 

“It felt like you would be just fine substituting me for the sport.” 

“Yeah,” he agrees. 

There’s so much to explain and he’s afraid it would take too long. He needs to tell you that’s not how he feels and that it’s not true at all. And perhaps he’s become self-aware of his ability to grow numb to things like homesickness and he tried to apply that to you too so that he wouldn’t be crippled by the sheer magnitude of how much he truly missed – misses – you. And how appalled he was when he realized he was associating you with memories and nostalgia, as if you were a had-been and not a still-is. 

But you seem to understand because your hands are still gentle on his face and your gaze is affectionate. 

“Stop crying, you baby.” 

“I’m not crying!” he denies. 

“If you don’t stop crying, I won’t kiss you,” you tease. 

He clams up, biting on his lips to stop the hiccups. His eyes roll upwards to the ceiling, willing any tears to stop overflowing. 

You laugh lightly at the sight, voice still clearly weak from your crying marathon. 

He has a lot to apologize for, doesn’t he.

You lean upwards for a kiss. It catches him off guard to this day, how much you can express in your gentle affection. It’s another thing he can’t feel through a screen. 

With each kiss you press on his lips, he counts the things he has to apologize for, but more importantly he counts the things he needs to tell you he misses and loves about you when he inevitably puts the 18,000 kilometers between the two of you again. 

And he’ll do it. Every day. Until the day he finally comes home.

[okwonyo]

seeing you perform for the first time.

ᙏ̤̫ ⠀엔하이픈 ♡ female reader & fluff love at first sight + cw. not-proofread 0.7k | ( bookshelf )

heeseung would be transfixed, he'd be able to feel his heart jump inside his body when he sees you for the first time. “i love you..” he'd stupidly think, his eyes would follow each one of your movements— he'd be hypnotized, not only of the way you look but, by the way your body moves so smoothly to the music. he'd find you addicting, a smile slowly appearing as your performance goes. it'd be dump if he didn't talk to you right after the show.

jongseong would enjoy the performance to the maximum; from the music to the outfits and the dance, he'd love it all. he'd be the first one to stand up when the performance starts, it'd be obvious he genuinely enjoys the music. but, when you'd come on screen, it'd be like the world stops. he'd stop clapping and moving his head along to the music— breath, and a bit of his soul, taken by your groundbreaking visuals. a smirk would appear on his face, ‘yeah, this is my favorite group for now on’

jaeyun would have been stealing glances at you ever since the award show started and you were sitting in the rows. then, when he saw you perform on stage— given the fact that he'd have fallen for you the second he saw you, he'd fall even more. his eyes would be wide open when he sees you on stage at the very start then, his mouth would be found agape when he hears your voice. funny thing is, he'd keep that expression on his face until the performance ends. really, nobody ever had this much effect on him before.

sunghoon would admire your beauty quietly and try to enjoy your performance discreetly— but, still, anyone would see he is really watching and having a good time. he'd nod along whatever lyrics you are singing, memorizing the way your lips moves and the way your hair fall back each time you flip them. he'd be so focused on you, he'd smile each time you smile, raise a eyebrow each time you do to. he'd never forget that first impression of you.

sunoo would not be afraid to show how much he enjoys the performance, especially when you are on screen. he'd bop his head along to the music and, even try to mouth the lyrics although he barely knows them. his eyes would widen each time the cameras make a plan of your face, always surprised by how beautiful you are. this sweetheart would whisper to whoever is next to him how impressed he is— “she looks beautiful, doesn't she?”

jungwon would be beyond shocked, his eyebrows would furrow and his mouth would form a tiny ‘o’— because, not only the song is good, but the girl singing his favorite part his jaw-dropping. he'd find you pretty in a way that challenges reality, asking himself if you are even real.. and, i mean it. his head would move along the way you body does, in a smooth way as he bite down his lower lip to break himself out of his trance like state.

riki would be so invested in the performance, and especially in you, that he would not even move a tad. his eyes would be fully focused on you— and, he'd find you so cool; with the way you dance and the fact your visuals are a whiplash to him every time the cameraman focuses on you. there would be a moment, throughout the performance, where a tiny grin would appear on his hips when you appears on the big screen again, and will not leave.

...

taglist open! @manooffline @ibsysbsfsunsbs @nwjws @lilriswife4life @alaezasmystery235 @teddywonss @tyussday @cholexxc @flickqr @yuviqik @wvnrqs @strawberrywonz @y-ves @isawritesss @filmofhybe @ikeucakes @gweoriz @hongincha @ashtxtrie @soul-is-a-strange-kid @jaelaxies networks @k-films @/k-labels

[milquetoast27]

The Secret of Sherlock Holmes

GRANADA FANS. If you have not heard of this play, NOW IS THE TIME TO HEAR ABOUT IT. I'd been saving it for a rainy night and it was SOO good 😭😭Please allow me to elaborate.

[heads-up, there are no video recordings of it. I listened to the audio and followed along with the script. Not ideal, but still gave me a vivid image of what was happening on-stage.]

The nuance between screen and stage allows the actors to achieve different effects that are not possible with an on-screen adaptation. Characters do not turn to the camera and just tell you their innermost thoughts, but they can in a stageplay- and it's here that we really get to hear Brett and Hardwicke's ideas about Holmes and Watson- not much of it was unfamiliar as I'd read most of Brett's views in interviews, but it was really cool to get that confirmed in an official production that he worked on. Honestly, Brett had that feeling of "I can fix him" that I think exists in all of us Holmes fans, and totally went for it. The canon (and the Granada series) is rife with subtleties and 'show, don't tell', but it is honestly refreshing for once, to have such powerful emotion depicted dramatically and audaciously on a stage. It is all too often throughout the stories that Holmes and Watson are awfully reticent about their feelings. This play is an explosion of their private thoughts that leads to finally, thankfully, a wonderful reconciliation. I love it so much as it clearly advocates for open communication being a vital factor for a good friendship. There's a good reason for why that never happened in the canon; I think it has a lot to do with the shyness and reticence of the English, and I would not be surprised most particularly with Victorian men. But Holmes and Watson do still have their moments in the canon (e.g. 3GAR & FINA), and it's what makes them stand out so shockingly much in their time.

I appreciate that this play gives us viginettes of Holmes and Watson's life together all the way up to The Final Problem. It not only sets us up for the climax later, but also shows us specifically Brett's Holmes and Hardwicke's Watson. There were changes made from the original stories, and yet felt so wonderfully in-character and flowed really well through the actors. The play exclusively stars Brett and Hardwicke, and the purpose of redoing scenes from the canon, such as STUD, NAVA, or CHAS was to highlight the status in their relationship, for example Holmes's displeasure at Watson's marriage and subsequent loneliness- important scenes that communicate Holmes's dependence on Watson. These small glimpses also give us the much-needed humour for any balanced Holmes production! It not only communicates the warm and light moments that they shared, but also helps us get more invested in this particular pair on the stage, which is still vital, even if we're already attached to the characters.

The implications that arise from Brett's portrayal of Holmes is fascinating. He admits that he'd have been dead within two years without Watson, without the indispensible role he played in controlling his addiction and mental state. He admits of the lonely and awful childhood he shared with his brother. The fact that Holmes comes forward and tells us this himself suggests he is very psychologically aware of himself and how his mind works. He understands why he has addictions, the reasons for his barriers and difficulty with emotional vulnerability. Assuming Holmes is very interested in the criminal psyche, but also his own due to his eccentricities, it makes so much sense that he would psychoanalyse himself to this degree, but also be frustrated with how little he is able to move from his rigid mindset. This interpretation works so wonderfully for Brett's Holmes, and I am so glad for this portrayal he has given us. When it comes to canon Holmes, however, I feel that this is more likely to be unconscious. I can never shake how much of Brett is actually within his Holmes. While his comes close to the original, I still see them as separate people. Granada's adaptation tends to play up Holmes's melancholy/depression a little too far for me, like a far-away, mythical creature that can never be understood, because we never get much of an opportunity to see what he really feels (perhaps Eligible Bachelor or Master Blackmailer might come close). But I feel that almost defeats the character. To me, Holmes is flawed and troubled, but he is simply human. The Secret of Sherlock Holmes portrays this fact wonderfully, because all of those feelings are rising to the surface.

We move further into speculation, but I think Brett's Holmes has also a fairly healthy understanding of the difference between social constructs and necessities, which take more importance in a queer/neurodivergent reading of him. He understands that his upbringing was due to an "accepted convention", and we see time and again how Holmes disregards social conventions or constructs and does his own thing. It's why he gets frustrated at others for not understanding him, but also accepts that it will never come easily to people. That's why he's very lucky for Watson (and Mrs. Hudson and Lestrade!) :)

Holmes's darker emotions, and Watson's fierce devotion are displayed most prominently throughout. When Watson comments on Holmes's childhood, Holmes lies about it, woeing internally over how much he conceals, to even someone as close to him as Watson. He privately shares his desire to be "found out", because sharing his feelings to Watson is too difficult. His friend takes his word for it, appreciative of the times Holmes is able to speak frankly about himself. Holmes wants to be open, and Watson wants to listen, but it's Holmes's barriers preventing it. This feeling and experience is so raw and human, and something I would imagine would resonate with many people.

The latter half of the play focuses primarily on Holmes's cocaine addiction. Pastiche writers really like that sore spot, huh. Watson's perceptiveness and powers of observation are on full force in this play. Watson can tell when Holmes is high (as a medical man, most likely), and even deduced that Holmes may still be living by Mycroft's body language. But when it came to Holmes's return from the Great Hiatus...

Something that canon Watson seems to completely forget is his anger towards Holmes. In the story, he is so star-struck and relieved that he barely considers any other feeling. Hardwicke does briefly touch on this in the Granada episode with "I thought I would be as trustworthy as your brother," but it really doesn't go further than that. In The Secret of Sherlock Holmes, Hardwicke goes FULL FORCE. This is what we needed!!! It was a powerful, hair-raising performance. When Holmes has clearly not understood the harm he has done, Watson leaves. Actually slams the door. And when he returns, he makes it very clear to Holmes why he is hurt. And yet, his devotion remains, for when Holmes starts explaining his creation of Moriarty, it takes a while before Watson is fully convinced. Watson is extremely compassionate and empathetic, yes, but he's also very grounded and level-headed, and he must draw the line somewhere. It doesn't take him long to forgive Holmes, but he knows his anger has a place in that room, and allows it to be. I appreciate that it's taken just as seriously as Holmes's troubles.

The only reason either Holmes or Watson are able to communicate so finely with each other- even through shouting and crying- is because of their emotional awareness. It's what makes their relationship work, because they are both aware of how much they mean to each other. When they move past the difficulty of sharing such feelings, their bond grows stronger.

[kevin-the-bruyne]

i don't really follow gmm couples closely but i thought firstkhao was one of gmm's biggest, what do you mean they're not that popular in thailand 😭😭

asdfghjkjhgf okay??? soo all this started because I was at my LAST straw when I saw a fan complaining that gmm prejudiced against first and he needs more work on twt (he already works *SO* much) and after having to see a series of gmm crits that were basically [insert false causalities/ metaphysically impossible demands] I lost my mind a little. [but actually its because im already pretty cuckoo bananas but I digress]

Then @fromthedepthsandbeyond brought to my attention this estimate (are you the op?) of events and brand sponsorships from last year where it shows that FirstKhao as a CP are in fact extremely popular but not at all popular as solo artists. And unfortunately I think this is just reality - they work really well together but I was actually both their 'solo' fans before they paired up. More khaotung than First and they are unfortunately just a little too kooky for mainstream popularity. I genuinely think Joong is trying to help Khaotung with roping him into TikTok dances and constantly promoting him on his own channel and IG broadcast because boy do First and Khaotung do nothing mainstream on IG. its only happy birthdays, promo work, promo cp, promo each other and khaotung's blurry artsy fuckboi photos. What can I say, that's what I like, that's what the people who like them like. I hope they don't change (but I know they're trying to). I would say, that actually they are quite popular given how far they veer from traditional masculinity...like they're pretty queer? Gun's numbers are exactly the same as them. Like I don't think GMM can do anything about that. I genuinely don't think GMM can do anything about the next bit either (at least in regards to FK they are very much fucking up other things)

What I was a little surprised by perhaps was this report by another fan who went to their building this summer (2024) and FK just had a mural on the second floor basement. I know that at some point they had some type of pillar on the ground level. Now, the events numbers are outdated and I follow them on socmed fairly close - they might not be getting sponsorships but they're not jobless. even at the times they're quiet or disappear when they resurface it turns out that they were series prepping or in workshops.

I don't know what to say, they're very queer coded, they take challenging jobs and are involved in projects and with creators that are invested in making some unique art which is rare at gmmtv something that everyone here loves to incessantly yell about (for good reason at times).

I don't know how to say this so that it doesn't sound totally insane but to be more popular they have to act straighter???? They actually have to look like they want to fuck a woman, like at least that they think about it instead of just each other. Like they tried so hard to make First's character straight in blacklist -A VALIANT attempt one would say and he still ended up having more chemistry with Drake and the 4 seconds he spent with khaotung on screen 😭 JoongDunk and PondPhuwin are just not like that??? I follow Joong and Pond on IG too and they are in fact able to breathe without their respective pair present. They are so so so so in love when together, bring each other up quite a bit when they're solo but they're not living inside the other's pocket if that makes sense? Sorry I ranted so long??? and for what?? but I guess what I'm trying to say is that I want Firstkhao to be popular but I also don't want them to change at the cost of mainstream popularity (though I understand why they're trying) - they are so worryingly codependent and wonderfully weird 🤧🤧🤧🤧

[onboardsorasora]

https://www.tumblr.com/overtake/746762194848563200/your-post-about-max-liking-daniels-ig-just-opened could u write something based on this?

I have had this ask for so long, sorry bestie- my brain was doing a thing at the time lol. lol thank you @secretdonderwolk for the unintentional prompt

His phone vibrated in his pocket, three times for three messages. He had an idea about who this was, he hoped it was his sister complaining about something. Or even Seb– even though he sat across from him at lunch. Seb could be annoying like that, but that was also because Daniel had been annoying like that first. 

Putting his phone on the table, he saw the screen light up with notification banners from Instagram. There was the broad one about how many thousand likes his post workout selfie had gotten. But then there was the secondary banners about replies and DMs. A familiar user name peaked up at him; 3_MaxV_3. 

Daniel rolled his eyes then flipped his phone on its screen. That kid, because he was a kid, with his scrawny body posing with a sideways cap in one picture, in a couch with dogs in another. But mostly in a race suit at a karting track. That kid had been messaging him for weeks now. He did the same thing repeatedly; Daniel posted a thirst trap photo (he looks damn good and it shows he’s working out) and then Max would be in the replies sending one thing the 💯emoji– three times of course. 

Daniel never responded to him after the first time, which was an accident, but the kid seemed to have taken that interaction as an open door to send Daniel reels of memes he already saw when he scrolled mindlessly through tiktok. He was surprised that a seventeen year old wasn’t on tiktok and was instead using instagram, but that also didn’t matter to Daniel. One less platform for this kid to find him on.

“Your new boyfriend again?” Seb teased with a snort.

“First of all, ew. He’s like still in diapers, mate.”

“I dunno why you let him annoy you so much. He’s harmless, still like in junior formula or whatever.”

“Don’t they call it like formula 3 now or something?”

“Who the fuck knows anymore. They change the names of this shit every year. Come I’m not allowing you make me be late for engineering.” Seb stood from his seat while Daniel cackled.

“I was one time!”

“One time is more than enough I think.”

— - —

Daniel pressed post on the thumbs up selfie. He’d gotten a podium today and wanted to commemorate after a long day. The first notification came quickly after. 💯💯💯 Daniel had become used to the routine by now, he already assumed that the kid had his post notifications on. It was weird but Daniel didn’t think too closely of it.

He did notice a difference this time. His username was different; maxverstappen_33. Daniel clicked into his profile, not something he did but there was a change in the routine and he was curious about why.

Lots of karting pictures met his eyes, pictures on podiums and in the garage. There were a lot more sponsor logos than before and Daniel couldn’t say he wasn’t impressed. He himself knew how difficult it was to even get sponsors to talk to you in karting, much less to invest. 

While he was scrolling through the rest of the profile, careful not to double tap anything of course, another notification banner from maxverstappen_33 popped up. “You are so beautiful Daniel.”

And well… that was new. Normally he’d get a lion or capybara video by now. MaxV had taken to sending him videos of quokkas recently too. Daniel had never given him the impression that these videos were appreciated or cared for– though he had watched a couple of them– so he didn’t understand this step up to shooting his shot.

Daniel closed out of the profile and then the app. He needed to get some sleep.

— - —

They’d told him to record a video for some kid getting his super license soon. That was new, but maybe Seb had been the one welcome in the new drivers in the program. It was quick with well wishes for some kid named Max. 

Daniel had wondered initially if it was MaxV, or rather Max Verstappen. But Vicky had told him nothing more and MaxV was supposed to be going to formula 2 now anyways. No way Red Bull would be making such a stir over a kid.

When he got out of the sim he had a bitchload of notifications. Red Bull had tagged him in something and people were congratulating him. Ace. He went to his DMs to see a new message from Maxverstappen_33;

‘Thank you for the video. It was lovely Daniel.’

Well, shit.

— - —

It happened slower than he thought it would have. But quickly in the grand scheme of things. Daniel stepped out of his motorhome, zipping up his race suit and thanking the handler to his left for his hat. It was shoot day today with the whole team, including the boys from Torro Rosso.

Daniil slotted in beside him and Daniel dapped him up. This would be their second year as teammates and Daniel was excited for the year to come. 2016 felt like the year maybe, to take the championship fight to Mercedes. The car was quick in the sim and Adrian said the wind tunnel tests have been phenomenal. Daniel was ready.

What he wasn’t ready for, was the guy who stepped right in front of him. Blonde hair, electric blue eyes. Familiar as fuck face pulled into a smile. 

“Daniel! It is great to finally meet you after all this time.”

Daniel hadn’t ever considered meeting MaxV in person, the kid that’s been sending him 💯 emoji what felt like weekly for the last maybe two years. If you scrolled through their DM it was very one sided. But here he was, very caught out at the very real and very eager kid waiting for his reply. This would probably be the first time he ever did reply.

“Enchante, Max.” Daniel grinned and glanced over a Daniil when Max’s face flushed with a blush.

He didn’t think about it the rest of the day. Not when Max kept telling jokes and whipping his head around to see his reaction. Not when Max would hold Carlos’ hand and pulling him into close hugs only to turn and look to Daniel’s reaction.

Daniil was having a field day and he knew Seb was going to learn about this somehow.

He didn’t think about it. Because Max was a kid or whatever and it was weird.

Max sought him out fairly regularly after that, bolstered by being in the same company and paddock. Invigorated at the fact that Daniel responded to him every time.

— - —

Daniel heard the news but he hadn’t quite believed it. He knew RedBull did driver swaps, apparently ‘all the time’ but he didn’t think he ever saw it happen mid season like this. 

He walked into the garage to see the host of cameras and mics. The identical RB12 no longer sported Daniil’s number but now had a large 33 plastered over it. The garage was also sporting the new 3|33 decals. Daniel knew that marketing was having a field day.

He stepped off to the meeting rooms to wait for the crowd to clear, fiddling on his phone. He’d never admit it, not even under the pain of a slow as fuck pitstop, that he was interested to see what the hubbub was about. What could possibly be so good about Max that they would do such a public shaming of Daniil.

He didn’t know how much time passed, but he tweeted a bit and posted a new picture to instagram during the time. The notification banner popped up; maxverstappen_33☑️ 💯💯💯

Daniel grinned to himself, still surprised that Max had kept this up. Still apparently had his post notifications on. The door opened. 

“Daniel that picture was lovely.” Max sat in the seat across from him in the conference room. His RedBull polo was a little askew, and he was smiling widely.

Well, shit.

[infernalodie]

𝟕 𝐇𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬 || 𝐄𝐦𝐦𝐚 𝐌𝐲𝐞𝐫𝐬

“𝘚𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘥𝘳𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘣𝘦𝘴𝘪𝘥𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘐 𝘵𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵 𝘪𝘵 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘦 𝘰𝘳 𝘥𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘩 𝘞𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘥𝘰 𝘵𝘸𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘺-𝘧𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘦 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘬𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘮𝘦 𝘚𝘰, 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵 𝘮𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘐’𝘮 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘵𝘩 𝘪𝘵?“

Inspo: Dominic Fike - 7 Hours

Pairing: Emma Myers x Black!Male!reader

Summary: Not seeing her was like life or death, but why did she not match that energy?

Warnings: Angst, but plentiful fluff and small mention of smut.

Words: 2268

This tedious cycle had to unravel sooner or later.

This 7-hour drive you would make weekly was playing a dangerous game in the realm of unconditional love. At the start, the conditions were understandable as to why you had to make this trip. But as it was, Emma had no work. Yet, she still insisted on you driving all the way here. Leaving you grasping for quarters, hoping to scrounge up enough cash to get back home.

“But it's because of love, Y/n.”

You might’ve agreed with that a few months ago when you got to see her. But you could see the distancing was getting to a point of complete disconnect. And you could accept that if she simply just said so. But she stayed quiet. Requesting you be back in New York next weekend before leaving you to drive home alone. No kiss, no hug, no little romantic gesture to encourage your continuous trips.

Maybe you were in love and this was just you trying to give her the hint. Shameless about how much money you’ve blown on her despite the non-reciprocated actions in return. And it wasn’t like the two of you were dating and she was treating you like a hookup. Because that’s not what you were. She was the one that offered the prospect of you two being exclusive and not search for others. You took her up on it because you genuinely like her for who she was. But in recent memory, it felt like the brand the both of you wore was becoming more meaningless each week you visited.

And even now, sitting in this club in downtown New York, she had yet to text or call. In some way, you could understand that she was busy. But you also knew she’d let you if she was cast in something and the days she would fly you out to come to see her. This was the system, but she seemed to be abandoning it the longer time went by. And you really fucking hoped you hadn’t just wasted hundreds of dollars because she no longer felt the thrill.

“She call back yet?” You turned your head to the bartender, Kelly, who you’d met many times from your numerous trips out here.

Kelly had no information as to who you were seeing. You left it ambiguous with only distinct details about Emma being given so the bartender could put an image of the mystery girl. But her company was well appreciated when you had to kill time between arriving and the invitation from Emma. If anything, Kelly’s company was comforting. A safe haven amongst the chaos that went on around your relationship with an actress.

You pursed your lips, lifting your phone and displaying the blank screen. She exhaled heavily, continuing to dry the glass in her hand. But you dropped your phone with a thud, taking another sip of your water. “I know you never ask for my opinion, but I don’t think she deserves you if she leaves you like this every time you drive out here,” Kelly commented. “If I was dating you, I would be taking you everywhere I could in hopes it showed I was just as committed to the relationship as you are. But I think you need to take a look and reconsider the unconditional freedom you have opened up.”

Some section inside of you wanted to just dismiss Kelly’s statement. Label it as “ignorance” and keep acting as if there wasn’t anything wrong. But you knew she was right. Although her words were very simply dumbed down to “break up with her.” It just wasn’t that simple. Especially after all the time you’ve invested in Emma and all the money you’ve spent because of her. Then again, maybe you were just stupid and walking blindly into something that would end up destroying you emotionally and financially.

Placing your hands in your lap clasped together, you shook your head with a certain uncertainty that could be masked by the hesitant smile that played on your face. Chest swelling with confliction that you tried to suppress. “I-I don’t know if that’s the-”

“Oh, God,” she groaned. “You are so in love that you can’t see she’s kinda being a bitch in this situation.” Kelly laughed, shaking her head. She placed the glass with the cloth and braced her hands along the edge of the bar. The look in her eye was a pity. Almost like you were some sort of puppy left out in the rain with nowhere to call home. It was embarrassing.

You chuckled, shaking your head as you felt your phone vibrate. Seeing the text message from that all too familiar caller I.D. Kelly noticed, raising a brow as you grabbed the phone and shoved it in your pocket and stood to your feet.

Licking your bottom lip, you took one last sip of the water before pushing the glass toward the woman who promptly took it with ease. “Do people ever actually come to you about their problems?” You asked, pulling out your wallet and a bill which you placed onto the bar.

Kelly took it, smiling teasingly. “No, because I give them what they don’t want to hear. And from every drunk guy that has told me their problems, you need it the most,” she stated confidently. “So, fix your problem or don’t. I’ll be here for the rest of the night.”

Exiting the club, you made your way across the street. Shamelessly jaywalking simply because at 4 o’clock AM, no one that was sober could be spotted. Slipping inside your car, you pulled out your phone and looked down at the text and felt that familiar bubbling euphoria.

It rushed through the nerves and muscles. Like your limbs were tensing up with that shiver that rolled through in one foul wave. Something about it was distasteful and could only be associated with discomfort. But the muscles in your cheek pulled your lips into a smile every single damn time you saw her name appear.

“I’m waiting for you.”

Arriving at the apartment, you took the main route you were always told to. Through the back door, up the stairs to floor 3, stop at the elevator and take that to the tenth floor before you walked down the hall to Emma’s room. It was a simple formula that you followed because you knew her fear of you being discovered as her boyfriend. It would bring unwanted attention to both of you and neither of you wanted that when this was the only time the two of you got to enjoy away from reality.

Your knuckles met with the wooden door sharply, announcing your arrival.

The sound of footsteps could be heard muffled behind the door before the door unlocked and swung open. Revealing Emma in a black dress with her shoulder-length hair pulled back into a messy ponytail. A slit in the dress showed her pale right leg that left you inhaling deeply.

It was a new look, that was for sure. Usually, she was wearing something that took no time to get out of. Because, at the end of the day, this was a time for both of you to relieve stress. A chance to make up for lost time during the week when texts or phone calls didn’t help relieve the tension.

So, this look was for sure new.

“I thought you were going to wear something nice.” Emma turned around, walking away. Leaving you to close the door and kick off your shoes with a scoff.

“Well, if I was supposed to, I wasn’t informed,” you stated. Entering the living, you found Emma gathering her tiny little things and stuffing them in her purse. You sighed, collapsing on the couch as she disappeared into her bedroom. “Was your agent supposed to call or email me? I don’t know because there is barely any communication going on, Emma.”

“The last thing I need tonight is you being a smartass, all right?” She stepped out of her bedroom with a jacket now in her grasp. Placing it on the island and grabbing her phone, sending a quick text. She didn’t even seem present or aware of the underlying problem going on between the two of you.

And maybe you were being too lenient with her because she was an actress. She shared the screen with Jenna Ortega, someone you’d met. Her performance on Wednesday immediately shot her into the spotlight. There was no changing that and you could understand that her giving you time would be varied at times. But you knew her schedule. She told you everything so you could plan your trips to see her for a single night. There was no filming coming up that was on her timeline that could interfere with any of your guys’ time. So, her lack of energy with anything involving you was disheartening, to say the least.

“I’m stating the obvious, Em.” You sat up on the couch, hands clasping together. “You’re here one second then when I leave, I get nothing from you.” You laughed, leaning back into the cushioning. Its bland fabric smell invades your senses as you waved toward her. “Even when we do talk, the only substance is for one of us to cum and then we wait for the weekend.”

She sighed, tossing her phone onto the island. “I don’t want to talk about this right now, Y/n,” she deflected. “I just want to go to this diner and then we can spend the night here. So, get up and let’s get going-”

“C’mere.” Emma looked at you in question, raising a brow. You smiled, waving her over encouragingly.

It was annoying. How could you smile immediately after you showed a clear aggravation? Your resilience was a shining factor that Emma liked. Despite the fact that she demanded so much from you, somehow, you showed out. But it was also so damn annoying seeing that smile of yours when she was already feeling some sort of anger bubbling in her gut. “If we want to go out for dinner, we need to leave now-”

You groaned loudly, childishly, which silenced her abruptly. “Just c’mere, Em.”

The girl bit her bottom lip, looking at the door and then back at you. Compilation written over her expression before she exhaled heavily. She made her way over, heels clicking against the hardwood floors of her apartment.

She took the hand you held out for her, standing between your legs. Your hold was gentle despite how calloused your hands were. The roughness of it somehow comforted her. Because despite the static, she could always find safety in your faint friction.

And the flood of thoughts could be seen in your eyes, and she was the source of this trouble. She knew why and she didn’t like that she was the cause of this frustration in you. “If you’re never gonna make the initiative to see me, then at least treat me like I mean something to you,” you said. “Because you have 100 percent of me, but I don’t think that I get that from you.”

A harsh statement that had Emma holding her breath. Fingers freezing around the tiny thread she toyed with. But when she lowered her gaze, you promptly angled your head to keep it. “I don’t expect you to spend day in and day out with me on your mind but I can’t continue doing this if you aren’t going to give me a reason to keep going like this.”

Emma pursed her lips, blinking rapidly. There was something warm, yet, uncomfortable that filled the air. Something made her face flush forming tears to the brim in her eyes as the tip of her nose grew hot. Only further producing tears to roll down her cheeks.

You stared up at her sadly but full of understanding. “Don’t tell me everything, but give me something. If I drove 7 hours for nothing intimate, give me something to leave with.”

You rubbed soothing circles into her thighs. Further comforting her despite the clear tenseness in the air. “I’m scared you’ll leave,” she confessed shakily. “That’s why I keep my distance and don’t come to see you. It saves me the chance of getting too attached.”

That made you sigh, gently pulling the girl down so she was pressed against your chest. Face hidden in your neck with her warm tears wetting your shirt. “I just don’t want everything around me to become too much for you,” she wept, fingers curling handfuls of your shirt. “I care too much about you. I can’t imagine myself without you.”

A smile wanted to form just because that was all you wanted to hear–to know you meant something more than a fuck. But her body quivering and racking with soft cries made you stay present with her. Rubbing her back softly as you said, “You shouldn’t ever think about that. If you think it’s because of the press that surrounds you, I could care less. Those fuckers are the least of my worries.” you whispered softly into her hair. “I’m actually more scared of not being around because I think it might end up with you coming to kill me or something.”

Emma laughed softly, sniffling with her face retracting from your neck, quickly wiping her eyes. You leaned forward, holding her cheeks gently and smiling. Pressing a kiss on her forehead and saying, “I’m always going to be here, baby. Just treat me like I’m worth it.”

[cocteaucherry]

slowburn ༺

summary- slow burn with Nanami

cws- slow burn, tooth rotting fluff, suggestive comments, Nanami x reader, wing man gojo vry brief.

a/n-(inspired by slow burn by infinity song, I recommend listening to it while reading :3

Nanami knew it was stupid to wait for someone

Even more stupid if it was juvenile love

But he was waiting for you.

He wishes he could grow the balls to ask you out after all it’s been how many years , you two could qualify as a married couple with how your routines collide.

Every morning he would walk with you to the subway station, you both got off at the same station going your separate ways for work. He did corporate work, you worked as a pediatrician, you both went to lunch and he’d always bring a singular rose.

He’d walk you home first wishing you goodnight and giving you a hug, once your front door shut his fingers would rub each other relishing in the lasting touch of your soft skin. Even though he had already said goodnight he’d send another one.

kento: goodnight sweetheart, get good rest I’ll see you tomorrow morning ❤️

Sweetheart was a nickname he had given you, something innocent you thought but did you want something innocent?

Nanami had grown love sick, he had also grown insecure, after all these years, would you want him? He hadn’t even had his first kiss or first time yet would you want someone experienced? Then he bought himself back to reality, you were a sweetheart (while petty at times) you weren’t shallow.

Even after all these years your old friends were growing irritated with your years long slow burn, Satoru especially.

“I’ve never been this invested in someone’s life go more than twenty minutes, this is just torture y/n-“

“Well then butt out Satoru.” You huffed crossing your arms.

“I can’t, seeing you both dance around each other and not make moves is awful- you’re both oblivious.”

“Well! If you’re so smart, help me Satoru.”

He sighed lifting his blindfold to rub his eyes, “Ever thought of just asking him out like a normal person?”

“Kento is so much more than a normal person.. I want it to be special.”

Satoru rolled his eyes with a grin, “Well Nanami probably hasn’t had his first kiss which means..-“ he started chuckling looking at you.

“Satoru-“

“I’m just sayin-“

“Satoru please.”

“Be his first good fuc-“ he was cut off by your phone coming in contact with his infinity causing the screen to crack, “Ouhhh.. good luck with that.”

You groaned loudly picking up your phone, great another thing to fix.

It was a Friday evening, it was heavily raining and you and Nanami were taking shelter under the awning of a shop. “I think we should try it tomorrow. It sounds great.” You grinned.

“Really? As cute as a cat cafe sounds it doesn’t sound hygienic,” he hummed.

“Ehh, but it sounds cute.”

“Anything is cute to you.” A smile tugged at his lips as he pulled out an umbrella handing it to you.

“Kento come on, I really don’t need it!” You tucked your hands in your pockets as you glared at his tired eyes.

“I’m making sure you don’t get a cold, your job is basically being a doctor anyway, horrible way to promote business.”

“Orrr, we can just share the umbrella, I’ll just stand close!”

“W-Whatever works for you.”

Huh he stuttered and must be cold.

Your arms found Nanami clinging closely to him, his hands shaking as he opened the umbrella. “Let’s get going.” He smiled a shade of pink creeping up his neck.

The walk was possibly the calmest scenic walk of your life, the rain pattering around the umbrella as you cling tightly to the blonde man’s arm.

Nanami was cracking. He wasn't sure how much more of this he could take, your soft touches, your voice, the way you say his name. He wanted to rip his face off from the absolute childish behavior he exhibited towards you.

Once he made it towards your very familiar walkway Nanami didn’t wanna let go, his arm tightening around your hand. “Well I’ll see you tomorrow Kento!”

No no no, he couldn’t stand watching you walk away again he watched you walk away approximately 4,380 days.

Just as you slipped from his grip, a tight hold was bound on your wrist, you turned around frantically to stare at Kento as he gazed at you, his stoic expression replaced with a worried one.

“Y/N please let me speak to you.”

You stood still gripping your coat sleeve tightly hoping this was what you were expecting, “I’m all ears.”

“As you know.. I’m not good at expressing emotions but I've been deeply enamored with you since the day I saw you.”

You couldn’t help the smile, a small giggle that came out your mouth, you saw his demeanor shrink and you immediately shook your head. “No no no! It was just your word choice! No one has ever said that to me.”

Nanami’s hand lightly gripped yours as he continued, “It’s about time someone had, and I wanna be the first.. The truth is, I want to be with you everywhere, I want to date, to marry, to grow old with you.. I want us to have unforgettable experiences-“ he was cut off by a pair of lips on his, you had made a move.

His calloused hands wrapped around your waist forgetting the umbrella and this being both of yours first kiss it was mostly teeth. When you pulled away the soft assault of raindrops dropping into your hair made you smile, “I want that too Kento..”

“Just wish you had told me earlier before I had my first kiss at twenty-six.” you playfully smacked his chest.

[songbirdseung]

PS5 / choi yeonjun

The air was heavy with a mix of frustration and disappointment as Choi Yeonjun's girlfriend, Y/N, watched him intently, her gaze fixed on the glowing screen of his PS5 console. She had given it to him as a surprise gift, hoping it would bring them closer together, but instead, it had become a wedge between them.

Yeonjun, once a social and attentive boyfriend, was now spending his free time engrossed in virtual worlds, his eyes glued to the screen, his fingers dancing across the controller. Y/N's invitations to go out or spend time together were often met with excuses of 'just one more game' or 'I'm almost done'.

You loved admiring your lover, seeing the different facial expressions they would make to daily life scenarios, or the sparkle in their eyes when they are invested in something they are so passionate about. But today was not one of those days.

You enjoyed filming (with consent of course) him and fill your gallery with silly videos of him and his reactions to certain things. Like that time, you gifted him a PS5 for just a random appreciation gift. That day he could not stop clinging onto you and thanking you. You have videos of him playing for the first few times and him whining frustratedly. Videos where he would be sweet and endearing to you. You enjoyed rewatching all those videos. But again, today was not one of those days.

Your boyfriend Yeonjun just got back from a world tour and spending his first week break with his family. Now that he's back home with you for the next and last week, you thought he'd spend his time with you. Nope, you were very wrong. When your boyfriend got home, he kissed and hugged you but right after washing up, he goes over to the living room and plays for hours on end, not paying you any attention.

This went on for a couple more days, you did not want to be that kind of girlfriend who nags her boyfriend about playing video games all day and taking away one of his hobbies, but since the week is almost coming to an end, and he'll have to start working again, you were not gonna let this slide no longer. As the days passed, you found yourself growing more frustrated with Yeonjun's constant immersion in his video games. You tried dropping hints, like casually suggesting activities you could do together or expressing how much you missed spending quality time with him. However, it seemed like your words were falling on deaf ears, and his focus remained glued to the virtual world on the screen.

One evening, after a particularly long gaming session, you decided it was time to address the issue directly. Taking a deep breath, you approached Yeonjun and gently said, "Hey, can we talk for a moment?"

He looked at you, slightly distracted but willing to listen. "Sure, what's up?" he replied, pausing his game.

You took a moment to gather your thoughts before expressing your feelings. "I've really missed you, Yeonjun. I understand that you enjoy playing video games, and I've always supported that. But since you've been back, it feels like we haven't had much time together. I was hoping we could make the most of this last week before you go back to work."

Yeonjun sighed, running a hand through his hair. "I know, I know. I've just been really into this game lately, and I guess I lost track of time. I didn't mean to neglect you."

You nodded, appreciating his honesty. "I get it, and I don't want to take away something you enjoy. But I miss us, you know? I miss our conversations, our laughter, and just being close to you."

He looked at you with a hint of remorse in his eyes. "I'm sorry, babe. I didn't realize it was bothering you this much. Let's do something together now. What do you want to do?"

A smile tugged at the corners of your lips. "Anything, as long as it's with you."

He promised you to get of gaming for the rest of the week and hang out with you. You got to finally sleep well after his words, but the next morning you woke up to another nightmare, him on that dang couch with a controller in his hand, playing the games you began to envy and grow a hatred for.

Not wanting to be in the house anymore, you grab the necessities and go out to meet a friend.

You meet her at a random museum that you always wanted to go to, once you meet up, you dont open up on the topic too much and pay attention in viewing the attractions of the art museum. But your friend knows you too well and ask what's wrong.

Eventually, you tell her everything and when you begin to tear up, she offers you both to sit down and hugs your side. "Maybe he just needs time to himself? time to adjust?" She proposes. But you shake your head and sigh "I don't know man, He's just not the same guy I started dating".

Your friend, sensing the depth of your emotions, tightens her hug and nods sympathetically. "I understand it's tough. Relationships go through ups and downs, and people change. Maybe he's just going through a phase, or maybe there's something on his mind that he hasn't shared with you."

You wipe away a stray tear and look at your friend, appreciating her support. "I just feel like I've tried talking to him, you know? I want to understand, but it seems like he's not willing to open up about what's going on with him."

She nods, offering a comforting smile. "Communication is key, but sometimes it takes time for people to open up. Maybe you could give him a little space but let him know you're there when he's ready to talk."

The two of you continue exploring the museum, momentarily shifting your focus from your relationship woes to the captivating art around you. As you move from one exhibit to another, you find solace in the beauty of the paintings and sculptures. However, in the back of your mind, the unease about your relationship lingers.

After spending some time immersed in the art, you and your friend find a quiet bench to sit on. She turns to you, her eyes filled with concern. "Look, I know it's hard, but relationships are a journey. People change, and sometimes they rediscover themselves. Maybe he's just going through a phase, and things will get better. But you also have to prioritize your own happiness and well-being. If this continues to make you unhappy, it might be worth having a serious conversation with him about the future of your relationship."

You sigh, feeling a mix of emotions. "I love him, you know? I just want things to go back to how they were."

She nods, understanding the complexity of emotions involved. "Love is important, but so is your own happiness. It's okay to want things to improve, and it's okay to express your needs in the relationship. Just take it one step at a time, and remember, you deserve to be with someone who makes you happy and values your time together."

As you leave the museum, you carry these words with you, knowing that the path ahead may not be easy, but you're determined to navigate it with honesty and compassion for both yourself and your relationship.

Upon returning home, you find Yeonjun still engrossed in his gaming world. The familiar sound of the controller buttons and the glow of the screen greet you as you enter the living room. A mix of frustration and resignation settles in your chest.

Taking a deep breath, you decide it's time to have that conversation again. This time, you need to express your feelings and concerns more firmly, making it clear that the current state of your relationship is taking a toll on you.

"Yeonjun," you start, your voice steady but determined, "we need to talk."

He looks up from the game, pausing for a moment to give you his attention. "What's up?"

You take a moment, collecting your thoughts before speaking. "I love you, and I want us to be happy together. But the way things have been lately, it's not working for me. I miss the connection we used to have, and I miss feeling like a priority in your life."

Yeonjun sighs, setting the controller aside. "I'm sorry if I've been distant. I didn't mean to make you feel that way."

You continue, "I need to know what's going on. I need to understand if there's something bothering you or if this is a pattern that's going to continue. Because I can't keep feeling like I'm coming second to a video game."

He looks at you, realizing the gravity of the situation. "I didn't mean to hurt you. I guess I got carried away with the games. But you're right; we need to talk about this."

You both sit down, and a sincere conversation unfolds. You express your concerns, and Yeonjun opens up about the pressures he's been feeling, the need for an escape, and how he didn't realize the impact it was having on your relationship.

In the end, you both decide to work on finding a balance. Yeonjun agrees to be more present, and you agree to give him the space he needs, understanding that everyone needs moments of solitude. It's a compromise, a step towards rebuilding what seemed to be slipping away.

As the days pass, you notice positive changes. Yeonjun makes an effort to spend quality time with you, and you both work on rediscovering the aspects of your relationship that brought you together in the first place.

Love, communication, and compromise become the pillars that help you rebuild and strengthen your connection, turning a challenging chapter into an opportunity for growth and understanding.

[yzafre]

thoughts on tmnt 2003

I finally finished watching 2003 for the first time! I've been compiling thoughts as I go along, so here they all are, for the "I like hearing what new people think of my favorite things" crowd (and also just to give myself a place to put them).

Spoiler alert: it's mostly positive, and forgiving of the less-than-positive. This gets long, so I put it below a read more:

Okay, so I saw everyone talking about how different Rise was from 2012, and how it jarred people, and some people couldn’t stomach it, but I never saw anyone mentioning 2003’s place in this discussion?  Because I didn’t realize just how much 2012 pulled from 2003, and I feel like the expectations that set about what it means to do a new iteration of the franchise definitely had a place in how people received something different

On that note, I kind of want to do a “who wore it better” post about all the arcs 2012 adapted... (although 2003 probably also pulled its ideas from somewhere else – I've heard the comics, maybe?  I barely know anything about those, so have no idea how closely they’re connected.).

The City at War arc (good series of episodes, btw) really clarified a point of difference for me in how I understand 2003 and 2012 Raphael.  And by that I mean I think 12!Raph would agree with 03!Leo?  Not on the honor/it’s our fault point, but on the “the gangs are out there hurting people, and we should do something about it”. I’d need to re-watch some episodes to check my work here (I think the episode where they meet Murakami sticks out most in my head?) but 12!Raph seemed to have – at least verbally – an investment in the idea of stopping bad guys simply because they were hurting people.

Okay so obviously Same As It Never Was is agonizing, BUT.  Leo in Usagi’s world was SOOOOO funny to me.  omg.  Everyone just being all “ninja deceit”!  “Dishonorable ninja”!!  With Leo’s whole... deal.  Like from the beginning of the show I was like “isn’t bushido a samurai thing?” when Leo brought it up, so to see it being highlighted here is.  Mwah.  Even Usagi being “bluh bluh you’re turning me into a ninja with all this sneaking around >:(".  SO funny.  I was dying.

I’ve talked several times on how 2012 invested in inter-connected, long-form plots rather than being purely episodic, so it’s interesting to see 2003 move that way as the seasons go on!  I don’t think it ever quite reaches the level of ‘12, but you can definitely see how the writers were inspired by the plot work going on here, and went “okay, can we do that but more?”  The differences between how the two shows do it is interesting, too, but that would be a whole other conversation.

Similarly, I can see how part of Rise’s inspirations might’ve been some of the weirder world-building stuff going on in ‘03.  Everything about the underground city/ the Y’Lyntians, the idea of the Utrom/Kraang being here since long ago, all the more mystic stuff that ‘12 only sometimes dabbled in.  ((I also think part of the way Rise was written was to be in dialogue with the themes of ‘03 and ‘12, but that’s also a different conversation.))

I was aware of Grudge Match before watching the show, but given what I knew about it I honestly expected Mikey to be much more obnoxious about it?  Like yes he wouldn’t shut up about it in the multi-part immediately after the Nexus arc, but after that it seemed like he only mentioned it, what, once every couple episodes? Grudge Match implies he was louder about it off screen – which would be in character – but given how good the show usually is at “show don’t tell” for setting up characterization it stood out to me.

Okay this is petty but.  I am getting very tired of the constant movie quotes.  Stop that.

Okay so on the topic of “show don’t tell” characterization – Leo's ptsd arc was good.  Like this was a thing I knew about before starting the show but everyone was right it was goooood. Like obviously within the limitations of a kids show, but a wonderful amount of nuance for that audience. It tracks so well start to finish, even from season 1 where Leo was shown to have this.  Really strong but devastatingly rigid sense of identity?  Like what it means to be a warrior, and who he has to be because of that.  Like the thing with his identity being tied to the swords, and then the reason why he was tempted by Shredder’s initial (lying) offer. It all tracks to like.  Okay when he fails.  When he can’t live up to it.  Of course it shattered his mental state and threatened his sense of identity.  Of course it did.  And then just several arcs of different plots but with this other character story woven through them.  Just in how he was approaching it.  This is the shit I was wanting from ‘12 the whole time.

And Usagiiii.  Usagi.  I love him so much, and this was such great use of him. Building up a solid, believable foundation for a very enjoyable relationship between him and Leo, then bringing it back at this critical juncture in Leo’s character.  FUCK their conversations in Samura Tourist were so good.  Amazing.  Fantastic.

Actually just all the work that’s done with the turtle’s allies is great.  The homeless/junkyard people.  The super-heroes.  Leatherhead.  Usagi.  The Daimyo.  Just... all of it?  I love it?  It makes the world feel more alive and the turtles grounded in it as like.  Real people.  Who make connections and upkeep them and.  Yeah I love it.

I reached Tale of Master Yoshi and noooooo it’s.  It’s the 2012.  It’s the 2012 backstory.  The inspiration for 2012’s whole thing… its right here… ((Although is it just me or,,, does Yoshi (our hero) look a lot more western compared to Mashimi (our villain)?  There’s something about that.... hm. Hmmmmm.))

Hello season 5! A!Ni!Me! Bullshit!!!  Very accelerated anime bullshit.  Obliviously this is a huge inspiration for Rise, though I appreciate that that show took more time for the powers to build up.  Also the ninja tribunal are assholes and very questionable teachers.  Would it kill you to actually explain anything ever.

Huhhh okay so I am picking up a LOT of Rise vibes not just from the mystic powers/glowy lines, but from Splinter’s deal with the ninja tribunal, and how they wouldn’t hesitate to sacrifice the boys, and how the brothers need to stick together.  VERY reminiscent of Rise!Splinter’s deal with the Hamato.

Noooo not Oroku Saki getting possessed by a demon.  Hello Rise backstory.  I see.  It really all comes back to 2003 doesn’t it?  Rise was definitely made by people who looked at S5 and went “okay, can we do that but more?”

Have I talked about how much I love that from the beginning the show was just like “oh yeah also actual superheroes exist in this world, it’s just an accepted thing”?  Because I do.  Love it a lot.  Having most of them be really old/kinda retired/people are forgetting about them was a good idea though because otherwise.  Their spotty presence at cataclysmic events would be much more noticeable.

Dragon fight is cool.  That is all.

The fact that at this point Stockman is just straight up like “Let me die.  Please let me die” is.  Well it sure is something!

I’d heard the last two seasons weren’t as good and… yeah.  Like it’s not bad, it’s just… less good.  I miss the world and characters of the previous season.  Though hey did the Rise gear designs steal some inspo from this season?

HOWEVER.  The episode introducing the dark turtles.  Where Leo’s like “if you’re really my clone, you should value honor and the code of bushido!” and his counterpart just... stares solemnly for an extended time before being like “lmao yeah nope” and sucker punching him was hilarious, and got a sharp laugh out of me.  Favorite moment in this season.  I actually liked this episode overall, too.

So.  Hm.  Mikey has always been very un-serious – a jokester, (verbally) a bit of a coward at times, easily distracted.  But as this season goes on it really feels like they’re amping it up/exaggerating those traits, to the point of stripping away anything else at times. Similarly, his brother’s willingness to indulgence/reactions to his silliness seems to fluctuate wildly, but on a downward trend - they always razzed him, but in this season... well they paired his increased goof-offs with increased put downs/jokes about it. This, while a bit annoying to me as a characterization choice, does track on a more meta-textual level.  By this point it’s 2006-2007.  2007 is the year Big Bang Theory aired, which I find to be, uh…. Tonally representative of the cultural attitude in the US between 2008 annnnd… 2013-ish?  There was this extra-concentrated feeling of, like… snideness and sarcasm that I remember around that time period.  It’s also very prominent in TMNT 2012 – especially in Season 1 (when binging that show I was hit by high school memories so viscerally that I said, out loud, “oh, GOD, we really were all Like That, weren’t we?” only a few episodes in).  Similarly to my post about the increasing frequency of the “Gibbs slap”, I find it interesting to see the way the changing attitudes are reflected in the same show as time passes.

LET STOCKMAN REST jeZUS

Overall, I see three kinds of episodes in season 6: mediocre, good, and what I call “good but out of order”.  What I mean by that last bit, is like… okay, the Graduation episode was good in theory, but felt very strange coming after Season 4/5, you get me?  Things where the concept is solid, but seems to be placed in the wrong position in their arcs, which I think is a knock-off effect from the lightened tone of the season.

Oh.  I just got to the second episode of S7 and.  I don’t…. hm.  So, I could deal with the simplified designs in Fast Forward, because they got some cool new gear stuff added in as well, but this is.  Uh.  Worse. But even beyond that – the dynamics also feel sort of off.  If Casey has been going to this gym for a while, why is April only now doing something about it….?  I don’t feel like she would have let this go just because the guys weren’t there. Also I'm putting it down here now that I think the whole digital world thing is kinda dumb

I do think 2012 looked at a lot of the ideas for S7 and went “interesting idea, we can do it way better”, which I commend them for.  Admittedly, these can also be stock tropes: April getting possessed also reminds me of Ghost Busters/Zuul, and mind control is a pretty standard trope, but… well, you know.  2012 took so much else from 2003, you can’t help but wonder if they pulled inspiration here, too.

Oh they are wayyyy over-using the Shredder/Foot Clan sting/motif this season and it is getting,,, annoying,,,

I kept waiting to see what they were doing with it, but they did not handle Donnie’s guilt arc with anywhere near the finesse they did Leo’s.  It wasn’t… horrible, I guess.  It’s just notably lacking in comparison. They didn't even have Leo really sit down with him to talk about his own experience like???

I did appreciate them bringing back all those side characters in the finale.  I’ve already mentioned I love the plethora of allies and friends they gave the turtles in this iteration, so obviously that was going to please me, though they could have gotten a little bit better showing in the final fight.

Lmao the guy I thought was gonna be rat king!!!!  He’s there lurking and watching in the distance???

Good show!  But yeah I’d agree with people who say that the heart of the show is really in the first 5 seasons.  After that the characters and stories feel a bit… flattened? The more I pushed through the last two seasons, the more I was missing the first 5, which I really, really enjoyed. Ranking on my personal tastes of the series I’ve watched so far, meeting each show where it's at, it goes Rise > 2003 > 2012.  Rise and 2003 are really close, with Rise just beating it on account of “it was my first show” and also “I REALLY like anime bullshit”, although there’s potential for that to shift or fluctuate as it marinates in my brain. That being said, 2012 is the one that makes the creative part of my brain go crunch-crunch, so take that as you will. Continuing to go backwards puts me at the 1987 series, so I suppose that’s next.  I have plans to watch the new TotTMNT with family during the holiday season, so unfortunately I’m up for an (agonizing) wait on that one.

[eisforeidolon]

Hellers are twisting Jensen's words around because they don't like what he said,

"He doesn't think Cas's confession is something that needs to be solved. Cas said what he needed to say. It was a long time coming, it was heartfelt and beautiful. But there's nothing to solve. Dean took it in and then lost one of his closest allie and friend. The acceptance of that happened when Dean sat on the floor. He lost one of his brothers in arms and one of his closest people. When they come back, it just understood."

First, a sampling of posts with screenshots and links of some of the creative reinterpretations they're already self-soothing with, for context: [X][X][X]

It's bad enough now, because we already knew they were obsessed with cherry-picking things completely out of context and twisting themselves in knots to insist D/C, a totally real most epic romance ever was obviously happening off-screen the whole time. Because that's totally how storytelling works!🙄 So why wouldn't they insist Jensen saying Castiel's dying blather doesn't need a resolution means Dean already turned into the YA romance protagonist from their fanfic realized he was totes in lurve with the angel and reciprocated offscreen! See, no resolution needed! The thing is, though, I believe Purcon is one that has a stricter video policy so I expect this to end up even more broken-telephoned in a couple of months when there's no video to dispute whatever they're making up by that point, which I expect to be pretty wild.

What Jensen reportedly said fits exactly into what Castiel actually said in Misha & Beren's tapdancing on the line of legit queerbaiting the audience Castiel's goodbye speech. The whole climactic reason the Empty could come take the angel away was because he realized that just ~*feeling feelings*~, without having anything come of it, was enough. Regardless of whether you interpret those feelings as romantic love or the kind of all-encompassing self-sacrificing love the Winchesters have, feeling that way about somebody is happiness in itself (even if they don't feel that way about you). So yeah, whatever kind of love you read that to mean? There's nothing to inherently resolve there. Castiel put his feelings out in the universe, and Dean listened and moved on with his life. The thing that was "a long time coming" was Castiel's resolving his struggles as an angel living among humans trying to understand emotions and friendship. It's "clear text" that Castiel said I love you (whatever kind of love you interpret that to be).

Hellers are the only ones who desperately need there to have to be a resolution to that scene, because the only interpretation in which a followup would be necessary? Would be if Castiel's speech was romantic AND Dean also had romantic feelings. They can pretend they suddenly don't understand what a resolution is or that one magically (like the entire rest of their supposedly canon ship) happened off-screen so it'll be already happening in the revival as much as they want. It doesn't change what the scene actually was or what Jensen actually said, any more than the rest of their waffle ever has. They're just happily lying to themselves and each other all over again, setting themselves back up for more eternal disappointment. It's like a Peanuts comic strip, except they are both Charlie and Lucy with the show and creators as the football.

They want to crow about Jensen not explicitly saying the scene wasn't about romantic love somehow being him changing his mind (again), but that's absurd. He knows some people interpret Castiel's feelings as romantic and are very invested in the angel being a queer character. Putting aside whether what's in the text deserves that, going out of his way to tell them they're wrong about someone else's character? Would be a really bad look given the sensitivity of the topic. And he doesn't need to do it anyway, because whatever Castiel's ~*feelings*~ are, it says nothing about what Dean does or doesn't feel. Which he directly says is that Dean lost "one of his closest allies" "one of his best friends" "a brother in arms" "one of the closest people to him". It's pretty clear - if you don't tie yourself in knots pretending he's sending you secret signals about what he REALLY means if you only listen to half the words he said.

[veeveex3]

Gn!Reader x TWST Juniors on a Date

an: I’m SOOOO sorry I haven’t written anything serious since last summer ,_, again, college took up a bunch of my time so I didn’t take time out of my day to write. And when I did have the time, I didn’t have the energy to write, which sucked lol. But I feel a lot more motivated now so hopefully I’ll be able to pump out as much stuff as possible!

tags: mentions of kissing, mildly suggestive content for Trey, Leona, and Vil (not really honestly but i thought i might as well tag it), Rook Hunt, fluffy cute dates

Trey Clover (Picnic Date)

Trey was a great chef, especially when it came to sweets

So when he asked you out, he thought the best thing to do was to use his skills to help create the perfect date

He brought a plethora of sweets and snack foods made almost entirely by him and set up a spot near the edge of the Heartslabyul dorm

He also asked Riddle to behead anyone who went near the two of you so that was nice!

Trey opened one of the two baskets he brought with him, your mouth instinctively salivating at the thought of eating his sweet treats. He brings out a small cake, a couple of perfectly made sandwiches, and some artisanal bread. He cut your a slice of cake and watched as you spared the cake no mercy. He snorted to himself as he poured you a glass of water. As he went to hand you the glass, he stared at you for a bit. You cocked you head as he placed the glass next to him, eyes widening as he leaned towards you. He grabbed you chin and licked the corner of your mouth, letting out a soft hum. “You had frosting on your face”, he said rubbing his thumb against your chin “Who knew you were such a messy eater~?” You eyes darted towards the rest of the cake, wanting to smash your face into what’s left. Luckily, you decided against that.

Cater Diamond (Concert Date)

Given his love for music, it makes sense that this would be his idea of a first date

He tries to find an artist that you both enjoy so that the concert would be equally fun for the both of you

And if you get anxious really easily, he tries to find seats that are far away from the crowd

btw rip his wallet lol

Prepare to take a lot of selfies and just general pictures

As well as a lot of videos of you two singing and fangirling

The sound of music and screams fills your ears as your favorite artist sings on stage. Without giving it much thought, you sing along since you know the words. You throw away any shame you have, putting your heart and soul into having a good time. Cater, who was also singing along, takes a glace at you and stops. As if time has stopped just for him, he takes in the view: the sweat on your face from how hot it is, your eyes glimmering with excitement, your lips he can’t wait to get on his own. Your eyes meet his for a moment and he pretends he wasn’t just staring at you moments ago “It’s fine, it’s really nothing lol” he audibly exclaims to you, “Let’s just enjoy the rest of the concert!”. He has so little time to cherish this concert he paid so much money for but all the time in the world for you afterwards.

Leona Kingscholar (Movie Date)

Leona had a hard time thinking of a good idea, so he went with the most simple option of going to the movies

However, the theater the two of you went to was far from simple, having fancy seats and the whole room all to yourselves just in case you two got bored and wanted to kiss and cuddle instead

He picked a horror movie because he liked the idea of you getting scared and snuggling up to him

And if that didn’t work he could just fake being scared and snuggle up to you, he didn’t mind

Your arms grip the soft, velvety arms of the chair, intensely watching the screen. Leona gave up watching the movie a while ago; he could watch it at any time and watching your reactions was a lot more enjoyable. Your arms reached for the somehow-not-empty bucket of popcorn, eyes still glued to the screen. Whether from fear or investment, it was like a car crash you couldn’t look away from, already knowing the fate of the poor character you were watching. However, it still got you. BAM! The killer jumped at the screen making you damn near spill your popcorn. Leona chuckled, laughing even more when you got mad at him for doing so. “It’s not my fault your got scared. You can hold my hand if you want to though~.” You grabbed his hand, ignoring his teasing, and didn’t let go until after you left the theater.

Vil Schoenheit (Spa Date)

Vil is very particular about his physical appearance, so trips to a bathhouse wasn’t uncommon

Especially since they were often free given his status

After receiving an additional ticket, he decided to take you along as a relaxing date for the two of you

You sat in the bath, holding onto your towel for dear life. Even though the bath you and Vil shared was private, it was still wasn’t big meaning that without your towel, it was still possible for Vil to see you very naked. Speaking of, he emerged from the shower in a fancy robe, walking towards the bath. As he began to untie the robe, you quickly turned your head away, giving some incredibly obvious peaks. Unluckily for you, he was wearing a swimsuit underneath, glaring at you before letting out a soft laugh as he sunk into the bath. The two of you sat in silence for a bit before he gestured over to you to scooch next to him, which you did. Vil rested his head onto your shoulders and sighed. “I’m so glad you’re here to share this moment with me”, his arms gently wrapped around you, “It’s like I’ve died and gone to heaven...”

Rook Hunt (Restaurant Date)

Rook didn’t have the funds to take you out on the fanciest restaurant like he wanted to

But he still took you to the next best place, hoping you’d forgive him for being a broke high school student

Before the actual date though, he makes a grandiose display of affection with a poem as well as a big ass bouquet of flowers

He even transported you on a horse which honestly doesn’t seem as romantic as it does in fiction

Rook stares at you as you look at the menu. Even though the restaurant you two were at wasn’t the fanciest, the prices were still out of your pea-sized budget. Even though he promised to be a gentleman and pay for you, on behalf of said pea-size budget, you still felt bad for making him pay a potentially large bill. You tell him you were going to order the cheapest thing on the menu, before he dramatically stops you, telling you to, instead, ignore the price and go with whatever you liked the sound of best. You took his advice, and once the food came, you happily exclaimed with how good it came out. “Anything for you, mon amour” Rook said, taking your free hand and giving it a kiss, “Your joy fills me cent times over”.

Idia Shroud (Cat Café Date)

Surprisingly, Idia didn’t decide to have a date in his room

He didn’t want you to think he was a weenie and tried to think of a date idea that was fun but also wouldn’t kill him

His love for cats as well as the conveniently placed and quiet cat café on the island helped him make his decision

also he DEFINITLY tries to take a kitten home with him

You sit down with Idia as a table towards the back, looking through the menu to decide what snacks you should get. He nervously looks towards the cat tree across from your table, pupils dilating at cute cats. As the waiter serves you some water and fancy macarons, a treat curtesy of your date, a cat walks over to you, bumping their head against your leg. You start cooing at the chubby cat, scratching their head as you feel another bump from your other leg. You look up at Idia again, who’s looking at the wall and passive-aggressively eating a macaron. You smirk, picking up the fat baby and calling Idia’s attention. Once you have it, you pose your head next to the cat, who meows in time with you. "The hell..” he muttered, covering his face, “warn me next time you wanna hit me with a x2 boosted cuteness beam...”

Malleus Draconia (Museum Date)

Malleus was frequently bored in his history class, already knowing what was taught to him made the class more like a chore

One day, he realized that he could use his knowledge on history to impress you and mayhaps court you

So, he rented out an entire museum to take you through it as well as the history of his world

Malleus grins to himself, happily dragging you along to the next exhibit he wanted to show you. From ancient magical devices to artifacts of fae history, he’s shown you all of it. His favorite he’s saved for last: the gargoyle exhibit. While they were all essentially grotesques as they did not spout water, they were originally gargoyles, thus sparking his interest. As he infodumped to you about the history of each gargoyle, as well as which ones were actually grotesques, you leaned into his arm, gently holding his hand. He stopped for a second to look at you. ”Are you growing tired? If you would like, we can make our final stop to the gift shop earlier than expected so we can go home.” You nodded your head and let out a yawn, feeling guilty for cutting his fun short. He wrapped himself around you from behind and leaned forward to give you a small peck on the cheek, holding you for a short while before finally taking you home. 

[tornrose24]

After finishing rewatching all of The Ghost and Molly Mcgee, these are my thoughts.

I think this is the one time in who knows how many years I’ve been invested in something that came from Disney. I haven’t seen this kind of passion project in a long time and sadly I don’t know if I’ll ever see that magic again for awhile, considering how Disney itself has suffered with many poor choices.

As for the show, a lot hits different when you know how it ends. Certain moments become a lot more meaningful with that knowledge.

I’d say first season was the better of the two. There was far more at stake and the story was building up to its climax in numerous ways compared to season two. The threat of The Chairman and the discovering of the duo’s friendship is very much felt in more episodes compared to Jinx.

Scratch’s character development is really noticeable in season 1, but in a way Molly’s is as well, given how one learns to open up and learn kindness and optimism while the other also needs to learn to open up in other ways, as well as grow into the wise, yet still optimistic teenager she becomes at the end of the show.

Season two… the stakes aren’t as great here. As stated by others, the Chens are overall not given much as a threat for season 2, and Jinx is used too sparingly so the penultimate season does feel a bit rushed. I honestly would have taken out some episodes from this season and replaced them with ones that could have addressed this, especially had the creators known they’d only get two seasons. Though of course they did not when starting out and it’s surreal to think that–had things gone right–we’d be waiting for season 3 right now.

However, I’m still sticking to my initial thoughts regarding ‘The End.’ I still don’t think it was necessary for Scratch to forget Molly.

The first problem is that this plot point is already one a lot of us are familiar with (I’ve seen it quite a lot in my case). Doctor Who used it (before it got changed), Spiderman No Way Home used it to a painful extreme, and Gravity Falls temporarily used it in its own finale. There’s a novel called ‘Just like Heaven’ that is a more romantic version of TGAMM, and it ended with memory loss as well (though the movie has a happier ending). I feel sad, but I also feel angry, which leads to my second problem.

Molly and Scratch’s friendship is the heart of this show. We were entertained and moved by it, as well as how far they would go for each other. So when Scratch forgets, we feel Molly’s pain as observers to her and Scratch’s story. We want Scratch to live his life as a human, and we wanted him to go out and see the world, but he should NOT have had to forget Molly in exchange. I know we always have to say goodbye and that there are some people who were special to us that we might/will never see again, but dear lord, being forgotten is a certain type of pain that hurts even worse. 

Rewatching/remembering certain scenes is now more painful, knowing now that Scratch will forget them. Him saying that he’d hate to forget Molly was too cruel. When I was getting cloer to revisiting ‘The End’ I was feeling reluctance to continue on, and not just because I was almost done with the re-watching. When Scratch merged back with his body and the screen turned to white, I had to fight the urge to shut the episode down and pretend things went differently. That’s how much it hurts when it’s not just a casual viewing. I know these characters ultimately belong to someone else, but I wouldn’t want to put them through that kind of suffering.

Had I been in charge of the show, but kept the idea of ‘taking risks is what makes if worth living,’ I would have used one of two different endings. One where its the same, but Scratch remembers Molly. The other would have been a time skip, when Scratch returned to Brighton with Adia and he reunited with Molly who is a little older but is still the girl he knew.

But… I do appreciate the small ray of hope that was given. That Scratch’s behavior as a human and certain use of words–as well as calling Molly by name despite supposedly never hearing it before-fuels a lot of hope that one day Scratch will remember and he will reunite with Molly one day. That even a few writers proposed a reunion story where Molly hugging Scratch would trigger his memories to come back gives me hope that there's still a possibility in that story. (If anyone tells me I'm stupid to be thinking those things, please don't because I care about those characters THAT much.)

Until then, we have aus, what ifs, and fan fics to fix that.

So… I don’t know when I’ll rewatch the whole show again, given the emotional toll. I’ll still revisit some episodes and scenes. But I’m grateful that Disney allowed this show to exist–it deserved more love and attention. If this had to be the very last good thing to ever come out of Disney, I’ll take it.

[alessandriana]

I'm curious about the scar removal actually

So that one was prompted by an exchange I had on twitter. Tl,dr, the EXR translation made it sound like it was Jiang Cheng who was desperate to get rid of the scars: Although Wei WuXian had never been hit by a discipline whip before, Jiang Cheng had been. Even after desperately trying, he couldn’t make the disgracing imprint fade one bit. This was why Wei WuXian would never misremember scars like this. (CH 11)

But the "he" in that sentence is quite ambiguous! Is it referring to Jiang Cheng... or to Wei Wuxian?

When the official translation came out, it seemed to support the latter interpretation:

While Wei Wuxian had never experienced this particular lashing himself, Jiang Cheng had. Wei Wuxian had wracked his brain to help him lighten that humiliating mark, but all efforts had been fruitless. Wei Wuxian would never mistake the sight of such a scar.

Later in the book, we get the flashback to Jiang Cheng waking up in the Wen supervisory office:

Finally, Jiang Cheng propped himself up on his elbows. He looked down at the wound from the discipline whip on his chest and let out a bitter laugh.

When the discipline whip struck, there was no removing the mark of shame. Against his own conscience, Wei Wuxian said, "Don't look. We'll find a way to get rid of it." (CH 60, official trans- EXR doesn't differ significantly)

From these, it honestly seems like Wei Wuxian is much more invested in getting rid of those scars than Jiang Cheng!

-

...All this to say, I found myself really wanting the story where WWX insists on helping JC get rid of those scars (whether JC wants help or not) and there's lots of chest touching and WWX has to sit on top of JC for some reason, and it's very sexy and they end up banging about it: The End.

And now a snippet, for those of you who've made it this far (NSFW under the cut):

The weeks passed, and battles were fought, and some were won and some were lost-- and some were a mix of the two.

It was after one of these latter that Jiang Cheng found Wei Wuxian setting his brushes and talismans up in his bedroom again.

They'd been loaned the use of a manor house by a sympathizer. It had been partially razed by the Wen, but there were still several buildings in good condition. Jiang Cheng had taken one of the rooms to the west-- it didn't have a bed anymore, but he'd set up his camp bed and it had been more than acceptable. It did have a low table, and that was where Wei Wuxian had lined up his things.

Jiang Cheng blinked at Wei Wuxian, startled. He'd almost forgotten about the last time-- consigned it to his list of embarrassing moments involving Wei Wuxian, of which there were many, and moved on. He'd assumed Wei Wuxian had done the same, and had given up this idea of his of getting rid of Jiang Cheng's scars.

"Jiang Cheng!" Wei Wuxian called, as Jiang Cheng entered. "Good, you're back-- what took you so long? The battle's been over for hours."

"It's been over for hours for you, maybe," Jiang Cheng said. Wei Wuxian was the reason the fight today had been a mixed win instead of a pure loss. He'd come through in the end with a mountain of corpses he'd dug up from a nearby graveyard, and with their help the Sunshot campaign had been able to beat back the Wen attack, giving them some breathing room while they recuperated. "Some of us had to help with the cleanup."

Wei Wuxian lounged on the floor as Jiang Cheng crossed over to the screen in the corner and began to disrobe. His outer garments were covered in blood and grime-- thankfully none of it his or his disciples'. "You weren't injured out there, right?"

Jiang Cheng could hear Wei Wuxian flopping around. "What, me? Hah! Those Wen couldn't get within fifty feet of me."

"Good," Jiang Cheng said, too tired to address the boasting. He'd personally seen a Wen soldier nearly take Wei Wuxian's head off just two days ago.

Jiang Cheng stripped down to his pants. There was a washbasin here, too, which had been filled fresh with water; maybe one of his disciples. He rinsed off with the cloth laid next to it. With each swipe of the cloth, some of his exhaustion disappeared, too.

When he came out he was in a better frame of mind to deal with the line of talismans, ink, and other supplies on the table. He said with heavy skepticism, "You really want to try this again?"

For a moment Jiang Cheng thought he saw a strange look in Wei Wuxian's eyes, a mix of trepidation and excitement; a strange energy. The look vanished so quickly Jiang Cheng wasn't even sure he'd seen it, replaced by something more mischievous. He grinned up at Jiang Cheng and said, "Yeah! I'm pretty sure I've got the right idea this time."

Jiang Cheng sighed. "If you say so," he grumbled, heading towards the bed and flopping down on his back. "But if you're just doing this to fuck with me--"

Wei Wuxian cackled, gathering up his supplies. "Nope! Not fucking with you," he said, dragging the table over to Jiang Cheng's side so it would be in easy reach. Jiang Cheng expected he would try leaning over this time, to avoid the previous problem.

Wei Wuxian finished setting up his stuff, and then-- swung his legs over Jiang Cheng's waist again.

"What the fuck are you doing?" Jiang Cheng squawked, bucking upwards. But Wei Wuxian had come prepared for this gambit, and he hooked his ankles under the edge of the bed and hung on as Jiang Cheng tried to escape. Finally Jiang Cheng had to admit defeat. He lay back on the bed with Wei Wuxian above him, heart pounding more than it really should have been.

Wei Wuxian said innocently, "I told you, didn't I? This is a much better position for writing the spells out."

"Surely there's some better way you can come up with--"

Wei Wuxian shrugged. "Simple's always best." Grinning a little to himself, he leaned forward and began to write.

The brush tickled cool across his skin. Wei Wuxian braced himself with a hand on Jiang Cheng's pec to keep himself steady. He kept shifting and squirming on top of Jiang Cheng as he wrote, tiny little motions that echoed throughout Jiang Cheng's entire body. The result was entirely predictable. Jiang Cheng felt his cock begin to thicken and swell.

Finally he said, strangled, "Enough."

Wei Wuxian's eyes were fixed on Jiang Cheng's stomach as he wrote. "But I'm not done yet." Then he pulled back his brush to examine his work, hummed, and said, "Okay, I need more room."

Then he shifted backwards until he was sitting directly on top of Jiang Cheng's dick.

Jiang Cheng's hands flew up to Wei Wuxian's hips. "What the fuck!" His heart was hammering in his chest. He was going to throw up. He was so turned on he could hardly breathe.

Wei Wuxian didn't look up. "There," he said, and put the finishing touch on the spell, and then suddenly there was power flowing through the spellwork and also somehow it was coming from Jiang Cheng's dick, or at least that's what it felt like, and then--

--then the ink burst into flames.

This killed both the pending discussion and Jiang Cheng's boner as they endeavored to put it out.

Afterwards, they didn't talk about it.

[markmybirds]

15 Day BL Challenge

Doing this Day-By-Day will probably be too much for brain so I have decided since it's relaxed I will be doing this 1-5 days over 3 days. I just want to also add on that I am an avid watcher of many different kinds of dramas, and I embrace different countries also. But I will probably go off of mostly Thailand here. This will get more complicated if I invest in my JBL and TaiwanBL pools and Growing KBL. I may do honourary mentions to those couples though I choose to use some of those pairings as my faves.

(Mom Life..) Also final beginning note: All original screen grab/posters/gif makers are given credit in the image descriptions. Day One: Favourite OG Actor Pairing My choice is Boun Noppanut Guntachai and Prem Warut Chawalitrujiwong (With Honourary Mentions: Billkin & PP Krit, Both Nattapong & Newyear Kitiwhut, Max Kornthas & Nat Natasitt and Ja Phachara & First Chalongrat) I will say I didn't know who to choose because I don't know who would be considered "OG" so I went with like a comfort couple of mine that has been continuously a comfort couple. I can't put into words how much I love them but really, if it's BounPrem I'm there and I'm watching it. I love how both of them are "comfortable" in their own way and they have shown us that they can be supportive of one another even when working on their solo activities. Boun has also put people in their place a few times for misconceptions of himself and Prem. As for Prem I just have always enjoyed his quiet nature. Also his quick responses that come out of nowhere and surprise Boun. (Example: Saying I love you when Boun told an interviewer he would love someone to say it genuinely to him one day.. Or that he'd donate his heart to Boun if he needed a replacement. Actually my husband and Boun have the same condition! It's something that can be helped when they're older.)

Also. Boun has one of the best laughs in all of Thailand oh and his earrings~! Come at me if you disagree. I am vibrating in anticipation for The Vampire Project.

Day Two: Favourite Rookie Actor Pairing Oh boy. Uh. There are so many but I think in the circumstances that both of the actors were rookies when they did their first series together? Tutor Koraphat Lamnoi and Yim Pharinyakorn Khansawa. Although Yim had been in the business since he was a teenager he didn't have a successful drama until he was paired with Tutor in Cutie Pie as NuerSyn. (Honourary Second Place: GeminiFourth Honourary Third Place: DaouOffroad Honourary Taiwanese Coupling: Tseng Jing Hua and Peng Cian You~. And shush! They were SO A COUPLE OK. ).

I just enjoy these two so much, their aesthetic is of course off the charts with Yim's ethereal alien looks and the fae-kind creature we know as Tutor. I consider them my comfort couple. The moment Yim entered Cutie Pie as Syn I knew he'd be my favourite character. After I finally got more into CP due to War, I got smacked by them a second time years later.

Also don't tell Zee and NuNew or Max and Nat but they were my favourite land for DMDLand2. Poker Land slapped so hard and both of these men are super talented. Yim was even sick when he performed and Tutor kept taking glances to check in on him. They are my comfort couple, I enjoy their relationship (whatever it is offcam) dynamic that we get to see. They admit to bickering a lot at the beginning of their promotions as a CPL. I love how daring they have been since the beginning too, our poor Kla and Ker working hard to maintain their and our sanities with these two. I can't wait for "Battle of the Writers"! Day Three: Side Dish That Should've Been the Main Course Warning to those who are heart broken like me: NetJames Incoming.

This is going to hurt my heart. This drama was not a BL but the side dish was our same sex relationship trope in the drama. The main coupling was two amazing actors who I love dearly I just felt that the director did NOT use Great and Four's actually-there-tension at all. The side couple is: Net Siraphop Manithikhun and James Supamonkon Wongwisut as Captain and Foei in Catch Me Baby. (I advise for people's sanity to never read MDL comments on dramas though. They have a weird hate for Thai actors..) I am not going to sit here and explain how I feel about NetJames since the news. I respect them, and I think NetJames fans need to learn to respect their boundaries and what they are going through right now. Cause ISTG if I read another: WHERE IS ___!? in their IG lives again I will explode and take everyone out. Also, I will forever support them individually or together.

That said Captain and Foei had that frienemies to lovers trope and chef's kiss. Just. I started this drama before I got back into the Thai BL scene again and it was what made me anticipate and watch Bed Friend every week when it aired. I have honourary mentions but every one of these I loved the main couple just as much or a little more than these side couples so I didn't choose them. Or they were the second half of their show's main couple or they got a spin off or show of their own (LOOKIN AT YOU YIDIAO~). GeminiFourth as Heart and Li Ming in Moonlight Chicken, JeffBarcode as KimChay in KinnPorsche, TutorYim as NuerSyn in CP and CP2 and NB, AyaKate as YiwaMarine in Wedding Plan (This is GL couple~), PealSee as TheeThai from Laws of Attraction and you can argue this with me but if you saw MoD you know this is canon: GreatMD as Inspector M/Dr. Oat in Manner of Death. Oh one more. Sorry. I love myself a good Side Couple: Xiao Kaizhong and Gao Han as MaoK in Falling Into Your Smile (they're a couple ok. AS READER OF THEIR WEBNOVEL YOU CAN NOT CONVINCE ME OTHERWISE.)

Day Four: Fave Ship Dynamic Oh my gods. Do you know how hard this question is for me? I'm like.. "Yes?". As a character artist and avid role player I like most ship dynamics. Wardog would tell you it's "Side Character Plots". So if I had to choose only one it'd be Character with Trauma x Green Flag. I love it even more if the Green Flag learns to be one through trying to be there for their love interest. They could also just both be people with trauma and both be green flags who heal each other. I am extending an invitation to view this gifset by Pharawee in its entirety because it's my fave part of LITA. And I have a lot of fave parts in LITA.

And here are some couples that fit here: FortPeat as PrapaiSky from Love in the Air, JaFirst as LeoFiat from Don't Say No, Okura Takato and Hyuga Wataru as Kaido Amane and Yamasuga Ryuji from Kimi to Narakoi wo Shite Mite mo, Tseng Jing Hua and Peng Cian You as Pu Yi Yong and Cao Guangyan from Oh No! Here Comes Trouble, NetJames as KingUea in Bed Friend, JimmySea as MhokDay in Last Twilight, PavelPooh (PoohPavel? ekeke) as CharlieBabe from Pit Babe and I could be here all day listing this trope.. So one more and I think this ship works on both sides: BillyBabe as PhayaTharn from The Sign.

Day Five: Biggest Flop Uhm. The problem is I like lower-income-shows but I think because of the lack of ethics behind this show: For Him and not because of the cast. I really enjoyed the cast, I just feel awful they had to work with so little to get at least decent content out. And that Tor had been harassed and stalked by one of the production members. I enjoyed the first few episodes, though the decline in quality of script and shots the cast had been given is very evident each episode you go through. The chemistry of the couples was chemistrying even with scenes like stepping on a new tattoo... For more information about this I would view befuddledcinnamonroll's 15 Day Challenge and pharawee's (wow we're on that tumblr a lot in this) coverage of the issues: here and here. Also reading through some of the casts' Twitters and

Another "Possible Flop" right now, hopefully not forever, I would say is Red Peafowl. Which is such a shame since their pilot slapped so hard.

TBC tomorrow~.

To do your own 15 Day BL Challenge Go Here!

[branzinos]

What’s your opinion on the new episodes?

rusty, but that was by their own admission in the entertainment round table. the pacing felt weird and charas felt oc because they were trying to set up a bunch of stuff at the expense of real character moments. Abbott has had a bit of a pacing problem since S2 - see how the legendary school stuff felt like it was leading to something big, and then was resolved in a single episode that wasn't even the finale - and already struggles with giving the full ensemble something to do - Barb and Jacob in particular felt really overlooked this ep - so I'm not sure why they needed to add THREE new recurrings unless its to fill out scenes that are Janine away from Abbott later in the season, because already two of those new charas feel superfluous. they were just standing there echoing lol. I also feel like they were so busy setting up bowling pins that there weren't a lot of jokes which also made it feel more sluggish than normal, but I'm hopeful that returning back to 22min will mean the next episodes are sharper. at the roundtable the cast unanimosuly said the library episode in the middle of the season was one their favourite to film so that bodes well.

the Ava side plot would have been fine as a one episode gag but in this two parter felt like a bit of a waste of time because it disappeared halfway through - though the dancing was funny. not sure how much I like the dismissal of her getting back into education though, it cheapens the growth the had in the previous season.

like everyone else I'm extremely relieved they broke up Melissa and Gary because they simply never set that up for us to have any positive connection with him, half the mentions of him off screen were about him being dismissive of Melissa, so I'm glad they let her set a boundary and keep it, it was a nice tie in to her relationship with Joe and gave her a bit more depth. like I don't care if they pair her up with someone, I'm not one of those people who is anti her dating a guy over a woman, but it at least needs to be someone in her own fucking league and that the story actually makes us hear about what a good partner they are (or a shit partner as long as the plot ESTABLISHES they are shit instead of trying to make us like someone who has given us no reason to). even if it's just off screen mentions like Gerald with Barbara - give us a reason to be invested in the relationship if you're gonna attempt an engagement scene, guys.

the way they're handling Janine and Gregory still seems right, it's season 3 of a planned 7 season show and it would be way too early to establish them as a steady couple, thematically that's the payoff near the end of the series like every other sitcom. it made sense that they're still approaching each other like nervous deer after the way Franklin Institute went, they're both still tender about it because it's still unresolved and they were both very vulnerable. they're still figuring things out and like Sheryl repeatedly says, they both need some therapy lol. they're very clearly endgame but it still needs more time and work for the payoff to feel earned and the show isn't at that point in the story yet.

anyway that new guy is Hans Frozen from Shein