#i’ve made the executive decision that he absolutely does

[antaripirate]

i have this silly little image in my head of lila going back to the captain’s quarters after a night with the crew, all drunk and giggly like she was in acol, and climbing into kell’s lap and attempting to kiss every single one of his freckles. kell just accepts his fate and let’s her kiss his face 983838 times.

[sukunasbabygirl]

I think something that needs to be understood is that Wittebane fans understand that the brothers and Evelyn aren’t the main characters of the show, we understand the true focus is on characters like Luz, Eda, King, the Hexsquad etc, I mean I love those characters just as much.

The reason I’m personally frustrated, and many other enjoyers of the wittelore are as well, is because it was genuinely built up. We weren’t fixated on small crumbs, we were fixated on an entire story that was relevant to the world of the isles today and the characters today, we were fixated on something that made the antagonist both irredeemable yet human. Which, sidenote, I’ve made a few posts before on why it’s important that we have more villains who are both humanised yet irredeemable and why I loved Philip for that, so you can imagine how he was treated in the finale bothered me quite a bit, I digress however.

In Thanks to Them especially there were set ups that we never really got answers for, and there is a difference between show not tell and… show half of it but not the rest, which feels like what they did. We don’t actually know how Caleb found his way to the isles, or why there were clues to find the Titan blood, or how Philip got there afterward, being as he seemed to have arrived later than Caleb but had no idea in TTT where the Titan blood was. These all feel like questions that could be given very quick answers too.

They hinted at Philip’s guilt multiple times but never really went anywhere with it, and with how the finale played out, it would be better if they just didn’t show it at all. And I have so many feelings about how his death played out but I’m struggling to word them all right now, I know it was the intent to humiliate him and that’s fine, but the way it was executed was such a jarring tonal flip and to me at least, narratively, didn’t feel all that satisfying in the long run?

Also the fact that it’s confirmed now that the Titan was looking out for Luz… does bother me a lot, considering the early themes of the show. The fact they were just two humans who made their choices, and Luz looked to the sky and saw the light and Philip didn’t, it made them so interesting as foil characters, especially as Philip believed the isles was hiding the glyphs from him. But that was the thing, it wasn’t, at least not originally.

Back to the Wittebanes though, you can absolutely leave most of their story vague and told through portraits while also addressing the stuff that probably should be known, and honestly I feel like removing the Collector would allow this. I don’t hate the Collector, when he was originally introduced I found them fascinating as a character, for both his parallels to Philip and to Luz, but in the end, he didn’t exactly add much narrative or theme-wise to the story, which wouldn’t be a problem if these weren’t the final episodes, and he honestly felt under-utilised. Also there’s so many little confusing contradictions with their character. I feel like he could have been written to tie in with the wittelore and also remain a foil to Luz which would have worked well, but in the end it came off as very messy and the storylines didn’t really connect, which is a bit of a problem for a finale.

I know the show was cancelled and cut short, but the Collector we know was a decision made after they found this out, so it feels like we may have gotten more wittelore originally, which would have kept the story and themes cohesive. I think I’m starting to repeat myself now, and I’ve gone off on a bit of an unrelated tangent. I just have so many thoughts and nowhere to put them, and this episode really didn’t feel like The Owl House to me, it just lacked that same emotional flare that focused more on character and story beats in big fights than the shock value or enormity.

I wasn’t so keen on For the Future after rewatching and I think a lot of the arguably wasted screen time during that episode, causing a lack of proper set up for this episode, definitely affected things.

I love this show and I always will, and if you enjoyed the episode then I am so glad you did, these are just my own personal, very complicated feelings on things.

[joonslfttiddie]

Home

Chapter 37: I Need You...

💜Fic Pairing: OT7 x OFC

💜AU/Genre: Reverse Harem/Polyfidelity/AMBW

💜Warnings: Adult content/Adult language

💜Rating: MA

💜Word Count: 3331

Hybe Lawncare and Landscaping…how may I help you?

His voice alone makes me so wet, I don’t respond immediately, a mixture of lust, love, and nervousness takes my voice.

Hello?

“H-hi, Namjoon? This is Tia.”

I can hear shuffling in the background, like fabric rubbing together, then him whispering ‘damn, bro’.

“HEY! Hey, Tia…my bad, I dropped the phone.”

I can’t help but snicker at his cuteness before saying, “Are you busy? I can call back at a better time.”

“No, no, it’s fine. I’m not busy at all.”

“Oh okay. What are you up to?”

The guys, satisfied that we are finally speaking, drift away from the kitchen to do their own thing, leaving me to speak in private.

“Nothing much, just took a shower, getting ready to wind down for the night. What are you up to?”

“I’m actually about to go shower myself. I’ve just been sitting around since my therapy session earlier.”

“Oh yeah, how did it go? How are you feeling?”

We speak about my session, I disclose what I’ve been struggling with, and I fill him in about the nut that was stalking me. He was surprised about my situation, yet very empathetic. Having a stalker and going through this nightmare is not something I would typically share after just meeting someone, but I feel he deserves to know what he’s getting into. And if I’m being honest, he is not like a regular ‘someone’ and speaking to him, hearing his voice dripping with a protective tone makes me feel comfortable to share. There’s something about these men, including Namjoon, that makes me want to bare my soul to them, hiding nothing. I find comfort in the concern in his voice and answer any questions he has regarding the situation. 

“But enough about that.  How was the rest of your day?”

“It was good. I was able to get all of my business cards passed out, you know, leaving some on doors or in mailboxes, conversed with some potential clients, and even lined up some jobs.”

“Nice! That is a good day, indeed. How long have you been a landscaper?”

“Uh, not too long, actually. I left my executive position at a prominent company earlier this year. It just wasn’t for me anymore, you know?”

“Yeah, that makes sense. I’m glad you created an opportunity to leave,” I encourage him and find a chance to dig a little deeper. “Does your significant other support your decision?”

“Ha, that was smooth. Ummm, no…no she didn’t. We broke up a couple of years prior. She prioritized status, reputation, and money over my happiness and mental wellness.”

“Oh, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to…”

“No, don’t be sorry. I’m not. Things between her and I hadn’t been good for a very long time. I think even me toying with the idea of changing my career was just the last straw, you know?”

“Absolutely, I get it.”

“So, Tia…what do you do?”

We speak a bit longer, getting the basic ‘get to know you’ questions out of the way before I admit that I’m wanting to see him. 

“I’m really enjoying talking to you. I can’t wait to see you again.”

“I’m enjoying talking to you as well. So, you know that I’m single. What about you? The men that are at your house, ummm…”

“Honestly, I don’t know if I’m single. I don’t feel single, but I also don’t feel like I’m not allowed to see other people. I guess it’s like an open relationship, but none of us have made anything official. We’re just kinda going with the flow of things. They are here now, I love them, we have sex, and I want them to stay. We haven’t talked about what this is just yet but I don’t mind answering any questions you may have, though. I like you, Namjoon, and I want you to know everything upfront before we go any further… IF you even want to go further. I mean, feel drawn to you and would love to see where things go but we come as a package deal. As I said before, I love talking to you and would like to see you again soon, but I understand if you need time to think this over.”

I know that this is a bold statement to make, seeing as I’ve only known these men for a short duration of time, but I feel it, deep within my soul that this thing is real. This supernatural connection between us is strong and the pull to these men feels like destiny. I take a deep breath awaiting his response, the short pause has me on edge and I find that I’m no longer breathing until he speaks again.

“I can be there in 45?”

With a huge, yet silent sigh I reply, “REALLY?! Are you sure? I mean, this is all so strange, even for me. I would completely understand if you think this is too much.”

Of course, some things never change, as I’m trying to give him an ‘out’ even though he’s making it known that he wants to try.

“It does seem unconventional, but I don’t think I’ve been more sure of anything in my entire life. This pull to you has surpassed me wanting you, I need you. I need to see you.”

“Okay! See you soon?”

“See you soon.”

After hanging up, I scramble up the stairs, falling up the last two.

“He’s coming! He’s coming over!”

I’m yelling out to the others and run into the bedroom to find Jungkook getting ready for work. Taehyung is sitting in the chair, which seems to be his favorite seat, talking to Jungkook and Jimin while carelessly browsing through his phone. Jungkook smiles at me, then starts to laugh, scrunching his nose in the cutest way. 

Taehyung laughs a similar amused laugh and whispers, “Cute.”

Jimin, standing in the doorway of the bathroom, takes me into his arms, halting my stride.

“Are you that excited, beautiful?”

“Yes, I am,” I say, not denying it, bouncing from excitement.

“What time is he coming?”

“Now,” I turn to answer Jungkook, Jimin now hugging me from behind. “He’s on his way but he lives 45 minutes away so I’ll still have time to shower.”

When I turn to look back up to Jimin, he brushes a few strands of hair from my forehead before placing a kiss there. My features are soft and relaxed, my eyes close lazily as his hands move down my face to gently pinch my cheeks. I mimic Jungkook’s nose scrunch, causing him to laugh then place a kiss on my lips. He then lets me go, guiding me past him and through the threshold of the bathroom by my wrist.

“Go get ready,” he says after smacking a firm hand to my ass.

“Yes, sir,” seductively drips from my lips, almost instinctively. The effect that simple statement has on Jimin is evident, from the way he bites his bottom lip to his eyes rolling back before closing shut.

When I begin to undress, all eyes immediately fall on me, which doesn’t make me nervous at all, but the butterflies in my stomach take flight anyway. Jungkook grabs his watch from the side table, and begins putting it on without looking down. Taehyung has turned to rest his chin on the arm of the chair, his arms dangling over the side, his phone swinging between the fingertips of his index finger and thumb. Jimin is still leaning against the doorframe, arms crossed against his chest while eyeing me hungrily. I continue to bare myself before ending the show by stepping into the shower, and the men continue with what they are doing. Before Jimin can walk too far away, I pop my head out and call out to him, “You coming?”

There is a darkness behind his eyes, as his smile spreads across his face, that I’ve not seen before but I’m determined to figure out what I need to do to see it again. When he is undressed, I open the door to invite him, AND the monster reaching up to his belly button, inside as steam billows out. The way his eyes examine every inch of me has me dripping in anticipation. As soon as he closes the door behind him, I pull him into me, receiving his warmth to my front to combat the heat from the water on my back. My arms hang lazily around his neck and his wrap around my back while we look into each other’s eyes.

“Are you intentionally trying me? You staring into my eyes like this just does something to me.”

“Something like what?”

He doesn’t have to say anything as his dick jumps against my stomach, the feeling igniting the burn in my belly. Tilting his head slightly and closing his eyes, Jimin takes my lips, pulling me tighter against his body and I allow my body to fall into him. This kiss is electrifying, sending chills from the crown of my head to the soles of my feet.

NAMJOON’S POV

Excitedly, I get dressed in casual house clothes. I had just gotten out of the shower and was getting ready for bed when she called. Unsure of what I should bring with me, I only grab my phone, wallet, and keys before setting out on this cool, night drive. 

Zooming down the interstate, I let the windows down to allow the wind to dry my still damp hair. Comfort fills my heart as I drive, the feeling of going home after being away for too long.

What’s funny is, I knew she wasn’t alone, even before she told me the guys were still there. I can’t explain it, but I could feel them...their presence. Is it weird that I don’t find it weird… the arrangement they have? Different, sure, but I don’t mind it. Me potentially being the fourth man in her life doesn’t bother me in the slightest, and with the way the others welcomed me earlier, it felt more inviting than basic hospitality.

I’m trying to stay under the speed limit but I can’t wait to get to her, to have her in my arms, and feel my lips on hers. It’s like I already know how they feel, how they taste, but I’m wanting more of the warmth I’ve never had. I’m imagining what she likes, her favorites…from food to candy, to movies, to music, to art, to sexual positions. How would she feel under the weight of me? Does she like it fast or slow? Can she handle all of me?

“Fuck.”

I really need to cool it and concentrate on the road instead of the different ways I’d like to contort Tia’s body into.

Taehyung’s POV

“Hey, how are you feeling? Did you get enough sleep today?”

“Oh, yeah, I’m good but I’ll grab an energy drink on my way. I’m glad this is my last night shift for a little while, though. I hate having to leave you guys,” Jungkook answers.

We chat comfortably for a bit as Jungkook gathers his things to leave.

“What do you have planned for the rest of the night? Tryna jump in with Jimin?”

I chuckle for a second before responding, “Nah… not tonight unless that’s what they want. I might watch, but I think Tia spending time with Jimin is important. Plus, Namjoon is on his way, so I may just chill with Jimin when he gets here, you know? Let them get acquainted.”

“This is crazy, isn’t it?” He looks at me with the brightest smile. “This thing we have with Tia, with each other…I never want to leave…Never want it to end.”

I know where he’s coming from and I feel the same way. Now that he mentions it, I think this may be the right time to ask about last night.

“So, I know we are all trying to figure out what we want this to be, but last night…”

“Yeah, things got a little heated, huh?” 

As if the thought hit him like a ton of bricks, he says, “Oh my God, I’m so sorry! Did I overstep, bro? I wasn’t thinking and just got caught in the moment. I never meant to make you feel uncomfortable, I just…”

“Jungkook…”

He stops his rambling, my voice pulling him out of his panic.

“...no, no, no. I didn’t feel uncomfortable and you didn’t overstep. It was amazing. That’s what I wanted to talk to you about, actually. I feel a similar connection to you and Jimin as I do with Tia. Does this make us bisexual? Pansexual? I’ve never done anything like this before.”

I take in a full breath and hold it there as Jungkook stands to look into my eyes, inches away from my face.

“Why do we have to put a label on it? Can’t we just love each other and talk about what we’re down for? Where our boundaries are? Let’s just do what makes us happy, huh?”

Jungkook’s arm snakes around the small of my back, pulling me closer to place a kiss on my lips. Then he pulls away slightly to peer at me again, making sure I was okay with the sudden contact but also awaiting my response.

“Yeah, I like that idea. We should come up with a safe word, too.”

“That sounds like a plan. Let’s discuss it with the others… tomorrow?”

“Okay,” I reply as he’s slowly releasing me. He pecks my lips again, then disappears into the bathroom for a few minutes. When he returns, he’s cheesing like a cheshire cat which has already piqued my interest, but when he shakes his head and continues down the stairs. I HAVE to know what is going on in there so I take a seat in my favorite chair after adjusting the angle just right, so that I can sit and watch, just as they close the shower door behind them.

Jungkook’s POV

After we all leave Tia to speak to Namjoon on the phone, I unfortunately have to start getting ready for work. We all may as well be living here as we rarely leave, except for work, and our clothes and other items are slowly accumulating, Tia finding a specific place for our stuff to go. Several of my uniforms are hanging in one of the guest bedrooms down the hall from the main bedroom. I'm also noticing how Tia has begun speaking, using ‘ours’ and ‘we’ a lot more often. 

I love the idea of this, of us all being in one place, but none of our places are large enough to accommodate everyone. I’m thinking of having a conversation with Tia being that I don’t want to assume anything. I want to make sure I’m not doing too much by being around everyday or having my things here. Yes, she pulled out extra toothbrushes and necessities for us and doesn’t seem to mind, but I just want to make sure.

As I’m getting dressed, Taehyung and Jimin keep me company while giving Tia her privacy to converse with Namjoon downstairs. We chat comfortably, like we’ve known each other for years… decades, even. Seated on the edge of the bed, I’m buttoning my last button when Jimin steps over to turn down my collar. Mindlessly, I place a hand on his hip, looking up into his angelic face. He is beautiful and I must admit, I am kind of attracted to him. His tenderness and care for me warms me from the inside. He licks his pillowy soft lips as he’s adjusting the last bit before stepping back to lean on the doorframe of the bathroom. My heart skips a beat and I’m wondering what this feeling could be.  

I’m lost in my thoughts when we hear our clumsy love stumbling up the stairs. We know she’s not hurt when she hops up and rushes into the room. I can’t hide the amusement on my face, watching her, so excited and childlike. I’m also not surprised at the bruises that pop up on her skin, as she’s always falling or bumping into things. If I could put her in a bubble or carry her in my pocket at all times, I would.

I wonder how long it will take to get used to this feeling of calm. With me usually being the jealous type, it’s foreign to be able to watch the woman I love snuggle up in the arms of another man, with nothing but mellowness and adoration in my heart. In a perfect world, I would be able to stay home with them, but I have to go ‘protect and serve’. I’m curious as to how things will go between Tia and Namjoon but I’m sure the guys will fill me in. I watch Jimin disappear into the bathroom behind Tia before I gather my things for work. 

Taehyung stops me, mentioning what happened between us last night, and I can completely understand why. I felt comfortable enough with him and Tia to do things I’ve never done…never thought I’d do, and things were intoxicating. I’ve never had any sexual experiences with men, but it just felt right in the moment. Honestly, it feels like I’m in a relationship with all of them, not just Tia. There is definitely a conversation we need to have, but until then, I’ve decided that, instead of searching for a category or label to place on what we have, that I will go with the flow and float along in our happiness.

Kissing Taehyung has become almost second nature. While he is older than me, there is something about him that makes him appear small. Maybe it’s the feeling of his slim waist in my arms or the way his body molds onto mine. Is it the way he looks at me or the way he melts when our lips touch? I don’t know, but I love it. 

After tossing my backpack on, I go to say goodbye to Tia and Jimin. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to guess what those two are up to in the shower, I know they are having sex. But when I walk into the bathroom and see their movements in sync, their wet bodies caressing against each other, the way they hold onto each other as if their lives depended on how close they can get, portions of their figures hidden behind the steam that has formed on the glass shower… the vision is simply breathtaking. I wait for the moment they notice me there, not wanting to interrupt and not wanting them to stop.

“JK, is it time for you to go already?” Tia pulls away from Jimin, wiping the steam with the palm of her hand.

“Sadly, yes. I just wanted to tell you guys goodbye before I left. Sorry for interrupting.”

“No! You’re not interrupting. I would have been sad when we got out to find you’d gone without saying anything,” Jimin admits.

I step closer when Tia opens the door, letting clouds of steam, the scent of her vanilla body wash, and sex to escape. She steps out onto the bath mat, water traveling down her amber brown-colored, smooth skin to drip onto the floor. Fuck! If I wasn’t on duty, I would love to lick every droplet from her flesh. With my thumb, I brush a few beads of water from her now rosy cheek and kiss her there. Using the grip I have on her, I turn her head to the side, exposing her neck to me so that I can nibble and kiss my way from her lips to her chin, across her jaw, and down her throat. 

She moans and grasps the straps of my bag, and though I’m loving the way she’s squirming and pulling me closer as I suckle at her sensitive spots, I have to let her go after kissing her lips one more time. Jimin, now standing behind her, smiles the sweetest smile which causes me to want to give him the same treatment, but I refrain from doing so, for now. I reach out to cup his face instead, allowing him to rest into my palm, his eyes closing for a moment. With a gentle pinch to his cheek and just one more kiss for Tia, I say my goodbyes before leaving the room.

[experimentalmadness]

Break the Cage

Synopsis: Tav is confronted after letting Astarion ascend and letting herself be turned into a spawn. Astarion is, of course, there to intervene. But there is far more to her choices than meets the eye.

Hurt/Comfort, mentions of serious past abuse, angst with a fluffy ending. Soft(er) Ascended Astarion,

A/N: I swear I'll post these all in a multi-chapter collection on AO3 soon, but in the meantime you can find more of my Astarion/Eidel fic here

***

“You’ve let this go too far, Eidel!” Jaheira’s voice was full of that insufferable righteous anger Astarion had had quite enough of. 

He lingered behind the door to their chambers in the Elfsong, peering through the slight crack as he watched the older druid pacing like a panther. Meanwhile his newly made consort held up her hands placatingly. “Please stop shouting.”

“It was bad enough you let him execute seven thousand souls, but you let him make you his spawn?” Jaheira continued, “What were you thinking?”

“It was my choice,” Eidel’s soft voice carried no hint of doubt. 

“Choice is something you will never have the luxury of again.”

“Jaheira, please, I’m still me. Nothing’s changed.”

Astarion watched as his consort tried to reach out to the elf only for Jaheira to take a disgusted step back. “The druid I had come to know would never have allowed so many to die for such a selfish decision.”

“I never said it was easy.” A mournful tone crept into Eidel’s voice. “I will spend my eternity balancing those scales…how can I make you understand?”

“You cannot.”

Eidel sighed. “Very well, but…you will stay, won’t you? Our goals are still the same. We need all the help we can get to stop the Absolute.”

“I stay for the sake of this city and its people, of course,” Jaheria said. “But you have let yourself become an abomination.”

Astarion saw Eidel stiffen, her eyes going wide. “Don’t call me that. Please.”

“Why? Do you suddenly dislike the truth? You are a druid, Eidel, a creature of life and nature and you allowed yourself to be severed from the natural cycle of life and death. I never took you for a fool until today.”

“Is it foolish to want safety?” Eidel asked, her voice whisper-quiet. “For him? For me?”

“Enjoy your safety in the little cage he will put you in.”

“I’ve spent my whole life in a cage!” A screaming rage the likes of which Astarion had never heard from Eidel before burst out of her. Even Jaheira seemed taken aback by the sudden onslaught. “All my life, Jaheira! I know what captivity is. I’m free. And no one can take it from me. Ever. How dare you! How dare you!” 

Her body was not built for anger. She shook and dissolved into tears. Astarion decided his curiosity was fully sated and he walked into the room. “I’ll thank you not to distress my consort further,” he said, coming to stand next to Eidel. 

Jaheira seemed torn between guilt and anger. She looked as if she wanted to reach for his sobbing Eidel out of an abundance of remorse, but he slung an arm over Eidel’s shoulders, drawing her into a comforting embrace. He spared the older elf a small smile of satisfaction. Jaheria’s impotent glare was oh so rewarding. 

“Eidel,” Jaheria sighed. “I did not mean to…there are other paths to take, child.”

“I think you’ve done quite enough,” Astarion gestured towards the door. “Off you go.”

Jaheira laughed without humor. “You cannot order me about, my lord.” Her voice dripped with disdain. 

“Whoever said anything about ordering? You’re going to leave of your own volition because I need a moment alone with my consort. And you are upsetting her.”

“I…would like you to leave now, Jaheira,” Eidel drew herself away from Astarion, eyes shining and wet. “Please.”

“I see you for what you are, Astarion,” Jaheria said as she turned on her heel to leave. “Even if she does not.” 

The door slammed shut behind her. “Well. What a thoroughly unpleasant woman,” Astarion rolled his eyes. “Don’t you worry, sweet thing, I’ll keep a watchful eye on her where you are concerned.”

Eidel had stopped crying, but her hands were still balled into trembling fists and he could feel her sorrow and rage pouring off of her. The tadpole allowed for him to sense her emotions, but now he could feel them as if they were his own. The bond he’d forged with her was new, and unknown. Maybe it held some magic he had not yet accounted for. Astarion frowned, not particularly enjoying tasting Eidel’s emotions at present. 

“I am not an abomination,” she said, more to herself than to him.

“Of course not,” Astarion assured. “You are perfect.”

“You won’t put me in a cage.”

He smiled. It wasn’t a question. She didn’t need reassurance to believe what she felt in her bones. But he gave her one anyway. “Unless you consider the Gate and all of Faerun to be one?” He hardly had to worry about her leaving his side. He could feel how terribly badly she wanted to always be with him. Her freedom, and his, aligned perfectly. And for such natural, darling, obedience he’d give her everything. 

She inhaled deeply, and her trembling ceased. “I wish I could make her understand. I wish I could make them all understand,” she lamented. 

“We don’t need their understanding,” he soothed, placing his hands on her shoulders. “We are far above needing their approval. We have each other.”

A smile flickered at his words, but did not stay. Eidel’s eyes were still downcast. “I shouldn’t have shouted.”

“Darling,” Astarion laughed, “you should have done a lot more than that.”

“I just wanted to keep you safe. To keep us safe.”

He was losing her to something dark he couldn’t identify. “Eidel. Whatever did you mean when you told Jaheira you were kept in a cage?” He’d heard her mention her life before this little adventure only on the rarest of occasions. He knew about the cage, about the fact that she had fled from somewhere before the nautiloid had found her. But the rest was an utter mystery. 

“I…I don’t want to talk about it.” 

Ah, that old song. How many times had he heard it? How many times had he let it simply slide away. “I find that puts us on rather uneven footing, wouldn’t you agree? You know all there is to know about me. All my dirty little secrets. I’ve shared everything with you. And yet you hide your past from me?”

“Astarion it’s…it’s not a nice story.”

“Oh and mine was such a fairy tale?”

Eidel had that look she often had when they touched upon her life. Prey hiding from the predator. He could smell her fear, a sickly curdled scent that wrinkled his nose. Eidel paced, walking a small five step by five step square from the hearth to the group’s chest and back again. “That’s about it,” she said, standing in the middle of the invisible square. “The size of my world for as long as I can remember.”

It was barely enough room to lay down in comfortably, even for one as slight as she. “It was always dark. I was always cold, hungry. I was a child and then not. There were figures always passing me in the dark but they never spoke to me. I would reach for them. I would scream at them. I learned to talk from the rats and spiders that would creep into my cage. When they would touch me they cut at me with sharp knives. Spoke in incantations. Shouted at me in frustration. They took parts of me with them every time. My horns first,” she reached up under her bushy ashen black hair to the flattened stumps that hid under. “Then my wings,” her hand went next to over her shoulders, reaching for the empty limbs that no longer existed. “Then my tail.” She touched her lower back, swishing her hips as if she still expected a muscle that no longer existed to move in response. 

“I had no thoughts for a long time. Not until the animals taught me my first words. Then I thought. This was the whole of the world. But the rats would tell me of the sun. Of the trees. The spiders told me of the soft places in forests. And I learned a new word: freedom. And I learned to want things. They taught me how to change my form and then I escaped. A spider crawling through the dark cracks of the earth until I found what lay outside my underground world. And there I was. And it was bright and beautiful and…lonely. I don’t know why I was kept in that cage, in the dark. I don’t know why they hurt me. And the more I think about that time the more I feel as if I’m back there. I will never go back. So that’s it. You know as much as I do now. Please never ask me again.”

Astarion didn’t know what to say. There was anger simmering beneath the surface, but there was more. Understanding. Empathy. Emotions that twisted inside of him, vile and pathetic. She reminded him of his own degrading past, standing in her invisible cage like that. He wanted to look away. “You have a deal,” he said, “I never want to hear anything so unpleasant from your lips ever again. Now, come with me.” 

He held out his hand and she was all too eager to take it. She was cold to the touch, a fact Astarion was still getting used to. He missed the gentle warmth she often radiated, but it was more than the chill of death on her skin. She looked dead. Her eyes were a blank, and her awkward bird-like legs shuffled alongside him like a thrall. An intolerable sight. He led her out of the rooms and up to the Elfsong’s roof where the afternoon sun was blazing bright. 

“Here we are,” he announced with a small flourish of his hand. “A far more fitting setting than those dreary rooms below.”

But Eidel only blinked. He felt her mental exhaustion, felt the weariness in his own bones. “Eidel,” he touched her cheek. “Enough of this. You were not made to be kept in the dark.”

“Why was I made?” she asked softly, haunted by specters of her past. 

“Oh, I don’t know, darling, hardly anyone knows those things,” he scoffed. “But I know that I made you for the sun. For the world to lay itself at your feet.” He turned her wrist over to kiss the twin bite scars he had placed there less than two nights ago. “I made you to be adored.”

He grinned as the light slowly returned to her eyes at his words. “You belong here,” he gestured around the open air. “So let’s have no more talk of such dreadful things.”

“No,” Eidel said before she brought herself against him. Astarion wrapped his arms about her out of reflex. “I belong here.”

He chuckled, “You sweet sweet thing.”

“This life? Freedom? It means nothing without you,” her words were deathly serious. None of her usual joyful, naive charm. “That was what I was trying to make Jaheira understand. Maybe she is right, in a way, maybe I am an abomination… I don’t know.”

“I can tell you definitively you are not, darling.”

“But, Astarion, I’d have sacrificed more than seven thousand souls for you. To protect you. To give you the world. I love you and it scares me. I cannot lose you.”

“And you never will,” he said, full of false gaiety. He tried on a laugh, but pulled her tighter still. Her words reached down into him, tearing something loose. He was the Vampire Ascendant, untouchable, invulnerable, but not against her. It was horrible to feel so keenly, disgusting to hold this fluttering bird and find her heart as valuable as his own. “We are bonded, you and I, for eternity.”

She still tasted of sorrow when he kissed her. “Eidel,” a gentle, teasing chastisement was on his tongue, but that wriggling, ugly vulnerability crept in when his guard was down. “I love you,” he said instead, surprising himself. It was not followed by a desire, a question, nor a command. He only wanted her to hear him say it. 

Her smile was as warm as the sun, a shining gem he had all to himself. She let out a small, joyful laugh that sounded like her truest self again. “Perhaps that is what we were made for, after all.” 

[oreo102]

What's your favourite episode of 13's run and why?

Ok! I surprisingly enough do have a favorite episode… but it’s by such a small margin I’ve made an executive decision to talk about 2 other of my favorites episodes and then a few honorable mentions and why I love them

I’m half sorry for how long this is, I’m fully sorry for the fact that it took a while to actually put my thoughts to words

We’re starting with my absolute favorite because that’s what was asked lol. The Power Of The Doctor is my favorite episode, the plot is fun but it’s really the characters that make me love it so much! Every character that shows up is used really well.

Yaz is absolutely the star of the episode. I love her in every episode but especially in this one she shines a lot. She takes charge so well and really does fill the docs shoes with flying the tardis and making the plans and all that jazz. Her interactions with everyone is amazing to watch but especially the master, their dynamic is so interesting to me! Mandip also does a great job portraying emotions in this one- her anger at the master, and sadness about 13 regenerating in particular is one of my favorite parts. Also yaz with a gun is hot, and I fully believe she woulda shot the master if he gave her a reason so this episode would be in my top five just for that

Speaking of the master! This is 100% his best appearance. The dancing, the outfit, his interactions with yaz being a mix of cruel and endearing, in a way? Maybe that’s not the right word… interesting at the very least. The way he talks to her like they’re friendly, like they both know the doctor very well… kinda like they’re two sides of the same coin, in a way?

13 is lovely in this episode. A) I ADORE the navy version of her coat and am so happy they brought it back in the inbetween cliff (or whatever that was) B) her regeneration might just be one of my favorite scenes, even if it pains me to watch (ignoring 14’s existence for this) and the hologram is so smart (btw does yaz still have that? Do you think it activates still?) also love the fugitive doctor appearance even if it was hologram form. Her comforting yaz, their conversation, the icecream <333333

Love ace and Teagan and vinder, they’re all great but especially ace is SO FUN and I love her interactions with graham(did they flirt?) who btw, I love that he was right back! Too bad Ryan isn’t there tho, it’s fun to see how the dr leaving affects the companions, the bitterness Teagan holds is definitely a really fun bit that I’m glad they included. Also Kate is amazing as she always is! Dan wasn’t that bad either but I’m still glad he didn’t stick around

Also! I really like the plot! I saw someone complain about having all 3 cybermen, daleks and the master in the same episode but honestly it was just super fun- and the master was really the main villain with the cybermen and daleks as minor/background/subvillains. I much approve fun plots over anything else and having the master dance to Rasputin is very fun!

Onto The Woman Who Fell To Earth!

Yes, 13’s first and last appearance are my favorite episodes! This will be much less in depth but I did recently rewatch this one so it’s as fresh in my mind as the first.

I really like how… snappy they all are, in a weird way? The fam kinda mellow out through the series, especially Graham. Theyre all somewhat aggressive in this one and it’s very fun! It’s too bad grace died… she’d have made a great companion

Also the plot, the plot is great. 13 making her own sonic, not remembering who she is but knowing she has to help people, picking up the first humans she sees (which she has a habit of throughout the series, lol), being super smart! Just lovely! Also her in a suit is hot

“I’m calling you yaz, cuz we’re friends now.” Is 100% one of my favorite quotes too

Also Swiss army sonic should’ve been a running gag, it’s funny! I think that’s everything- my thoughts on this episode are very disconnected but oh well

My third favorite: the witch finders!

I’m not actually sure why I love this episode so much? Actually yes I do, soaked 13 is hot- that’s not the only reason tho, promise.

The fam is great, as always, but especially yaz this episode. It portrays how kind she is really well! 13 experiencing sexism and being pissed about it is also really cool, I kinda wish we got at least one other episode where it happened but I understand why we didn’t . Also the king being gay for Ryan is funny as fuck and I didn’t notice it my first watch

The background(side?) characters are also really good- the possessed lady is a fun antagonist, and the king is wonderfully incompetent at his job.

Also 13 telling them not to interfere and then immediately interfering is fantastic. I don’t think I have much to say about this one? I just really like it

Honorable mentions!

The timeless children, solely for the scene with Graham and yaz being family and for yaz being halfway to the portal by the time Graham is done asking who’s first- tbh this is my least favorite appearance for the master and I think the cybermasters are stupid so

Arachnids in the uk I love yaz’s family, i love jade, i love that the bitch ceo gets schooled by women in stem and yaz’s mom, i like that when asked if she and the doctor are together yaz’s response is “we’re [just?] friends!” But when asked the same about ryan it’s a very emphatic “no!”, I love “more of the universe… more time with you.”

Demons of the punjab “we can’t have a universe with no yaz!”, young umbreen is so much like yaz it’s amazing, i love yaz in this episode (this, ive realized, doesn’t say much, I love her in every episode), the plot is really fun and again i love yaz’s family

The legend of the seadevils my beloved gays. The characters are all really fun, the plot is great, all the thasmin moments I love and they hurt my heart, and Dan has a stupid outfit!

Eve of the daleks once again: my beloved gays! The plot is so fun, and even though the side characters aren’t my favorite I still really like them

Fugitive of the judoon FUGITIVE DOCTOR MY BELOVED <333333 also Jack is cool

Oh also My least favorite is resolution because it’s boring. Ok I think that’s everything… hope you don’t regret asking!

[seasurfacefullofclouds1]

hi sea. i don’t recall seeing this article anywhere but i thought it was interesting. although it’s an interview about louis’ manager, m*** v****, there’s a good bit about louis like how very involved he is in the decisions and further confirms that fans and making the experience inclusive is so so important to louis. like it’s the driving force why he might go to unexplored little places. there’s not really talk of financials but the subject of louis giving others a hand up is discussed. anyways, do what you will with this, like delete it or something. hope you have a lovely day 💕

https://www.musicbusinessworldwide.com/the-idea-of-a-manager-artist-relationship-is-a-bit-outdated-were-simply-partners-in-running-a-business/

I remember reading this article and taking away a few points. It is pretty interesting to reread it in the context of the IQ articles (Holly Rowland) on touring, as well as seeing a bit of the business side from AOTV. So thank you for the reminder!

IS IT DIFFICULT FACING COMPARISONS TO ONE DIRECTION’S ACHIEVEMENTS?

We don’t really compare to what One Direction did. What Louis does and the music he makes is very different from any other members of the band, and indeed the band’s music. So it’s less of a comparison and more that it’s helpful to us. We use the data from what he did in One Direction, look at the activations they did and how they ran their campaigns and use elements of that which we feel will work within his campaigns. It gives us a healthy understanding of the audience.

HOW ABOUT THE COMPARISONS WITH THE OTHER MEMBERS?

You do get it and he gets asked about it quite a lot. What Harry’s achieved is absolutely phenomenal this year, you can’t deny it’s absolutely incredible. But that’s exciting – and it shows the power of the fanbase. That’s one thing that Louis has and the band had – the audience is incomparable to anything that I’ve ever seen.

With every promoter we’ve ever worked with, we say, ‘You’re going to have to prepare for this, because the fans will be there a week before the show, we have to put on facilities and security – you’re not ready for what’s going to happen here’. And every time they say, ‘Yes we are’ and afterwards they go, ‘Holy shit, we didn’t expect that to happen’! There’s a duty of care that comes with that that we put a lot of time into.

DOES LOUIS ACTUALLY WANT THAT 1D-STYLE MANIA NOW?

Absolutely, he loves it. But he’s definitely got an executive head on him. Within One Direction, his role was not only chief songwriter, he was also the decision-maker. That’s something he wants to employ going forward, whether it be managing artists or from a label perspective and those are all things we’re looking at doing.

With launching the festival last year and expanding it this year, we’ve seen an interesting opportunity where we could help new British acts and give them a platform they wouldn’t traditionally get.

BMG HAS HAD HUGE SUCCESS WITH OLDER ARTISTS. WHAT MADE YOU SIGN WITH THEM?

BMG was an exciting choice, because Louis didn’t want to do the conventional major label deal set-up that he was used to before, coming out of Syco. What took us about BMG is that it’s very much a partnership. With the way the deal’s structured, we’d go into this campaign where we have complete creative control and essentially control over the entire campaign on a global level.

They work with us as partners and with an artist like him, who is so global, having complete oversight over the whole campaign has allowed us to be quite nimble.

We can adapt the campaign on a granular level within various territories – that’s tricky to do within major label deal constructs. It’s the biggest thing that BMG have done, it’s their global priority and it’s been great working with them on that level.

[rpmemesbyarat]

In the Jurassic Park novel, Ellie and Grant are not a couple. She is his student, and engaged to a doctor in Chicago, while Grant is a widower with no romantic interest in her. In the film, this is of course changed, and the conflict of her wanting children but Grant disliking them (unlike the novel where he explicitly loves children from the start) is introduced, as is the potential love triangle between them and Malcolm (“potential” because I don’t think it ever existed anywhere but Grant’s own mind) Making the male and female lead into a couple when they weren’t before? Introducing a love triangle? Adding in a “woman wants kids, man does not” cliche on top of that? Normally, I would DESPISE this with every fiber of my being. But, it didn’t bother me. In fact, it took me a long time ever even think about it. So, why is that? Because, while I wouldn’t go so far as to say that there’s no chance that sexism and heteronormativity weren’t involved at all in these decisions, they are decisions that serve the story and characters very well and actually do make the movie better. Grant’s major character arc is learning to care for children as he gets two of them through a deadly scenario, and, in that, symbolizes him coming to terms with the progress of the future itself , and changing to dapt to how the world is changing around him. Remember, his debut scene not only shows he dislikes kids, but also computers and technology, and he says later in the film that now he’ll have to “evolve” when the kids ask what he’ll do now that studying dinosaurs is no longer an option. Which, of course, it is, dinosaurs being alive in a very specific place and way doesn’t mean there’s no longer a future for archaeology, but the question is really, how are YOU going to change because of what’s happened here? And he does indeed evolve. Adding Malcolm in gives him incentive to do that evolving. Again, I don’t think Malcolm ever actually had a shot with Ellie, but I think Grant was absolutely portrayed as worried about it. Especially because Malcolm points out he already has kids, loves kids, and wants more. In other words, here’s this cool suave man flirting with Ellie who will happily give her what she wants that Grant feels he cannot. He is faced with, in his own mind at least, the prospect or changing or failing, just like evolution in the wild. And on Ellie’s end, the fact she and Grant are in love means that her speech to Hammond about “what matters now is the people we love” carries much more weight, because it means they BOTH have people they love at stake. Yes, a student could of course still care about her professor, but it’s not really equivalent to what a grandfather feels for his grandkids, whereas a romantic love carries a lot more gravity, especially if they’re serious to the point they’re having debates about having kids. In other words, I don’t think these decisions were made just because someone said “well they’re the two leads and opposite sexes, so they should be a couple, and every movie needs a love triangle for tension, since of course a film about DINOSAURS KILLING PEOPLE lacks enough of that” I think these choices were largely made in service of the story’s messages and the character’s developments, moments, etc. And my point to all this is that basically I don’t think there’s any universally “bad” choices and “good” choices to make in stories. It’s more WHY the writer(s) made this choice and HOW they executed it. Because in a vacuum, these sorts of choices PISS ME OFF SO FUCKIN MUCH and yet in Jurassic Park, I not only am unbothered by them, I think they were a GOOD IDEA. And I’ve also read works where the writer(s) made choices that I probably would have LOVED if they were written well, that I loved the IDEA of, but in execution I absolutely DESPISED and thought were TERRIBLE. I realize, of course, this just makes writing more complicated, that there’s no true 100% checklist of things to never do and things that will always be a good decision. That’s frustrating, at least for me. But, if you think about it, I think it’s also freeing! It means you can do almost ANYTHING, you’ve just got to make it serve the story you’re trying to tell and the characters in it!

[starcasticallyyours]

starcastic’s fun facts about writing Art and Artifice

So, my Vmin Regency AU Art and Artifice is finally finished!! This feels rather surreal because I worked on almost nothing else for the past 6 months. It was such a good experience though because not only did I enjoy myself immensely with the craft and execution of this story, but the people who regularly commented were so wonderfully encouraging and made me feel like the sunken cost was all worth it. Thank you again, I love you all so much!

A lot went into the making of this story, so I really want to share more about how I wrote it as well as pointing out little Easter eggs I included, both relating to BTS or the time period. If any of this interests you, keep reading below!

FUN FACTS FIRST!

Not sure if anyone got this, but the title is in fact a riff on Pride and Prejudice! And the sequel will be even more silly by having a very Blackadder the Third take on another Austen title, but you’ll have to wait and see which one it is.

I already mentioned in an author’s note that each of the estates had IRL basis, but they also all had fictional ones. Harthaven is meant to evoke Mr Knightley’s Donwell Abbey with its stately farmcore vibes. Ivoring Hall should remind you of both Longbourn (especially with the Mins behaving rather Bennet-like) and Kellynch Hall (their money woes reflecting those of the Elliots). And of course, Davensley is a total rip-off of Mr Darcy’s Pemberley and is here to represent the epic breadth and majesty of all major English country estates.

Taehyung’s Grand Tour itinerary is based on Lord Byron’s from 1809-1811. I’m sure he desperately wanted to go to France and Italy but there’s a war going on out there, somewhere. And Seokjin isn’t here. (My Great Comet agenda will never rest)

Speaking of which, there should have been a Jin mention each update but I failed this when the Sope proposal scene became its own chapter and I forgot. Kind of bummed about it, not gonna lie.

I thought about having Yoongi read Sense and Sensibility at some point since it was published in October 1811. But then he went and established himself as an ardent enthusiast of gothic melodrama instead, how very Catherine Morland of him.

[major story spoiler] The backstory of why Merritt suddenly came back to England was that a great-aunt of his died and he had expected to be given her estate just to discover that this was not the case! Having sold his commission, he couldn’t return to a military career so he decided to wiggle his way back into Jimin’s life to gain his fortune/inheritance instead -- except he did not expect a) Minjeong’s wise decision to will Harthaven to Namjoon and b) Kim Taehyung. [end spoilers]

Not about the story/characters at all but I have a weird preoccupation with numbers so I’m particularly happy that I started this fic on 11/11 and managed to finish it on 5/5. 

A tidbit about the sequel: it will be from Namjoon’s POV and centred around him as he was mostly in the background throughout this story and deserves something good after his year of being sad. I’m looking forward to it because how he views himself is absolutely not the same way Jimin does!

THE WRITING PROCESS:

I almost always come up with a story’s ENTIRE plot before even writing it down. So after seeing @dayofkaryn​‘s tweet (like I’ve said so many times) in March, I was bit by a plot bunny and thought about it incessantly for about 2 months to figure out the main beats. This way, I can mentally test and veto things – at one point I had an entire other ending to the story that I never wrote down and ergo have totally forgotten what it was (something about Taegi teaming up against Merritt but I do not remember what their plan was at ALL). Of course, the final version of the story almost never resembles the chosen plot 100% faithfully, but having a roadmap is still really important for my personal security!

Next, I outline. Extensively. The version that I kept on tweaking and rewriting over the summer ended up at 11k words by the time I started. The point is that it’s a 0 draft and again, I’m figuring out the beats and identifying what needs to be done in regards to character development, structure, or just basic research.

I started drafting in late September and had the first 3 chapters ready by the first post in November (totally lost my head start by Christmas though, lol). When I draft, I cut/paste the section of outline that applies into a new Google doc and start forming them into sentences and paragraphs. Sometimes I end up rewriting the outline first, especially for later chapters after the story had developed into its own thing with a much clearer personality that deviated from the original plan! In draft mode, I also keep Wordhippo and Etymonline on nearby tabs to help me catch that word on the tip of my tongue and that my vocabulary choice is both period and suitably British. Luckily, thanks to where I grew up/currently live my spelling habits are already UK style!

Once drafted, I upload as a preview on AO3 and tweak for line edits/formatting there. Will admit that by the last 2-3 chapters this was not done and I would line edit after posting because my work schedule was hectic! But then the chapter is published, yay, and I go about my day trying not to think about it and reminding myself that the stats page is not an indicator of quality or worth. 

RESOURCES:

I’ll admit that I constantly googled shit while I drafted, ending up mostly on the blogs of Romance authors or Jane Austen fanpages. I do want to shout out this extremely cool collection of articles written by literally one person on very particular and niche topics from the era called the Regency Redingote. Even if it just came to one-liners about Jimin using a mote spoon or trimming quills, the wealth of information is just amazing and I could and have lost hours of time just reading about these random Regency things.

I also used videos for general education. Ellie Dashwood is a YouTuber who for a long time made Austen and 19th century her thing, so she was great for simple and straightforward explanations. (And she’s Yoongi biased!) There’s also this incredibly detailed re-enactment of a private ball by the Real Royalty history channel that they held in Edward Austen’s house! That one is just FUN to watch and learning more about the period via direct experience is a great way to do it in my opinion. And this one vlog about a pheasant shoot helped me significantly with Chapter 9 even if it’s very modern.

However, nothing beats immersing yourself in the OG stories! While writing this fic I revisited Emma, Northanger Abbey, and Sense and Sensibility from top to bottom, and picked up Venetia as a new Heyer read. I also checked out Jennifer Kloester’s Georgette Heyer’s Regency World from the library which had a lot of details about the setting and culture that was really useful. My library system has tons of Heyer actually, I should pick up another to celebrate finishing the AU!

WRITING SOUNDTRACKS:

I’m a creature of habit and usually will return to the same handful of mood music for a project. For A&A, these were on constant rotation:

For lighthearted scenes [like in chapters 4-7] / Jimin’s “theme”: the complete OST from Emma 2020. I genuinely love this movie for its cinematography and absurdity, and I love the soundtrack too! For Vmin scenes / Taehyung’s “theme”: Twoset Violin’s Mendelssohn 4mil Concert. I really, really like the Bach piano pieces at the start and end, and I find La Campanella to be very A&A!Taehyung coded: torrid and dramatic and also kind of ridiculous. I do pause writing whenever I hear the concerto starting to catch Brett’s panicked face when they prank him every single time, hahahaha

For Sope scenes / Yoongi’s “theme”: this collection of John Field’s nocturnes. My favourite is No. 10, the “Romance”. Soft and gentle, like our sweet Suga!! Other composers I would also put on from time to time were Beethoven, Pleyel (who Jane Austen was known to enjoy a lot), more John Field (concertos instead of nocturnes) and of course, BTS. C:

If you actually read to the end of this very self-indulgent and longwinded post, thank you for your patience! I hope you liked the story too, and are curious enough to see what the heck I’m going to do with pirates in the sequel. Because now I’m going to have to figure that out too. As always, I remain starcasticallyyours!

[sonofthesaiyans]

Seven “Best” Character Arcs in AOT by GameRant

This list is just all over the place, so here’s my two cents..... https://gamerant.com/attack-on-titan-best-character-arcs/ 7) Sasha Freaking Braus earns her rightful place on this list alongside the main three and in actuality is FAR more deserving of her placement there than some of them are. She may be a secondary character but she became a fan favorite for a reason. And I am still not about to shake on my stance that she is EASILY far better developed than Mikasa, despite only get a fraction of focus. Sasha easily could’ve been the main girl of the series and it would’ve been far more satisfying. More testament to what a criminal decision it was to allow Assassin’s Bullet to EVER be published. It was not just a bad call on Isayama’s part, it was an ABUSE. 

6) Armin Arlert certainly earns his spot, going from a shirking coward to arguably a better strategist than Hange Zoe or even Erwin Smith. Too bad the final season undermines this badly with his failure to field the Colossal Titan when it really could’ve come in handy, his nonsensical promotion to commander of the Survey Corps which for all intents and purposes was functionally destroyed by that time, and of course his infamous final exchange with Eren. Nevertheless......Armin does earn his spot for his growth in the story preceding the timeskip. 

5) Like Sasha, Hange Zoe’s demise is one hundred percent UNJUSTIFIED. She is a truly great character (Whether you choose to refer to her as male or female, however you roll) and like Sasha has an infectious personality, not to mention her great intellect which made her an effective warrior against the Titans. But......her character growth is kind of static. And once again, the goddamned timeskip didn’t do her any favors, making her come off as an incompetent commander who failed to subdue a betrayal from the likes of Floch and his fellow Yeagerists, and as many a fan will tell you, she NEVER GOT A BACKSTORY. Too many questions left unanswered about the Regiment’s third or fourth most senior soldier. 

4) Annie Leonhart, you gotta be kidding me. Story takes almost a decade to find a place for her again and she doesn’t regret any of her past actions......And she walked for her crimes despite being partially responsible for provoking Eren into setting off the Rumbling. That’s not character development.......That’s evidence that Annie should’ve died back during the Female Titan Arc. The bare minimum is afforded to her in the timeskip after her rather contrived return. As I’ve said before, TOO LITTLE TOO LATE. 

3) Mikasa Motherfucking Ackerman............Do I really need to repeat myself on this one? On why she doesn’t earn her spot on this list? 

2) Eren Yeager. One word for his arc: BASTARDIZATION. People thought Anakin Skywalker’s transition to Darth Vader was handled clumsily no thanks to the prequels. But that’s peanuts compared to Eren’s descent into madness. One of the biggest criticisms of the ending of Titan is how it completely undermines Eren’s motivations for why he did everything he did, with this insultingly forced predestination subplot that shows he was evil all along......A revelation that subverts everything previously established. And all for a world-destroying revenge scheme that it’s hinted he knew was never gonna truly succeed in the end. That said, I am in the crowd that considers Eren Yeager to be effectively discredited as both a protagonist and antagonist with the events of the timeskip, and he may very well be the weakest link due to its horribly misguided execution. Eren turning evil could’ve worked, but in the end......I have concluded that it was one of the worst bad calls of Attack on Titan. He absolutely should not be on any “Best Of” lists ANYWHERE. 

1) Levi, the only character who truly earned his survival in the end. Too bad he was pretty badly mutilated in the final acts. He is a true badass, but I am going to say I think his character growth is somewhat lacking. Probably because he loses all the friends relevant to his growth. And YET AGAIN, the timeskip did him no favors for sidelining him through the entire War on Paradis Arc. Levi’s saving grace is that he is enough of a badass and complex character to back up the focus he has enjoyed outside of these stumbles, so while I think his growth is lacking, he as a character is still good. And he deserved a better ending than what he got, because it wasn’t satisfying in the slightest. And he’s still an infinitely stronger character than his closest rival and mystery relative, Mikasa. Perhaps the series would’ve benefitted from him being the true main protagonist. 

This list doesn’t really acknowledge the deeper problems that undermines its selections, so it’s overall not reflective of how Titan handled its main cast.

But on the plus side, whoever complied this did not include that bitch Gabi Braun, easily the most unwarranted and unnecessary character in the saga. Too often praised for a character arc that simply DOES NOT MATTER. Sorry Gabi fans, but the payoff you love to tout doesn’t exist, so arguing that she was necessary to the themes and final conclusion of Titan simply hold no water. You cut her out and not much would change, except Sasha and perhaps even Eren would’ve gotten the focus they still needed in place of this bitch. 

Also, NO HISTORIA OR YMIR! Seriously, what the hell? 

Thoughts on this list? Thoughts on my verdicts on this list? Do tell.  

[inkykeiji]

As someone who admires the Todoroki family from a writing perspective and just Horikoshi's ability with characterization as a whole, I'm very, very scared that the series as a whole is just going to end cleanly. I'm invested in the Aizawa/Present Mic/Shirakumo/Kurogiri arc the same way you feel about the Todorokis, but I feel Horikoshi is going to go for a happily ever after for everyone somehow. I'm very fine with the idea of major characters dying, but I don't think Horikoshi has the balls to do it. That's just my two cents though.

That image of the Todorokis made me so happily sad in a way though. He's so SMALL next to Endeavor and Natuso!

YES oh my god

yes that’s my fear exactly, too. because i know hori has the talent and the capability to end these stories in gut-wrenching but well executed ways, but does he have the balls to do it????? to potentially upset a huge portion of the fandom that would rather have the fan-service happy fluffy endings instead of something that’s written beautifully but hurts so much??? i don’t know. i’m worried he doesn’t, but i’m really hoping he does >.<

i gotta be honest, it bothers me so much when people say dabi deserves a happy ending or that dabi dying is a ‘bad ending’ for his story, as if dabi didn’t kill TONS of innocent people just because he felt like it, like dabi didn’t consciously make the decision to take away mothers and fathers and brothers and sisters and sons and daughters from people, as if dabi doesn’t ENJOY killing, etc. it like genuinely makes me see red HAHAHA like alright, let’s say he lives. what happens? the only plausible answer is that he goes to fucking jail, because they got the man in 4k lucidly admitting to 30+ murders, among other crimes. what else could possibly happen??? the judge and the authorities and society as a whole just give him a slap on the wrist and ignore his laundry list of crimes because he’s ~got trauma~ and he’s ~the eldest son of the number one hero~??? dabi’s story as a whole is absolutely heart wrenching—and it deserves to stay that way!!!—but that doesn’t excuse any of his actions. like, at all. i’ve got loads of trauma too and yet i am not out there killing in the street lmfao.

or what? the whole todofam works out their YEARS long combined and convoluted family and personal trauma in one battle out on the battlefield and suddenly everything is resolved and happy and great again and they all love each other and everything’s been forgiven and dabi’s/touya’s severe mental illness just disappears??? just evaporates from the tissues of his brain like a fucking mist??? it’s borderline offensive LMFAO like i know this is a series about fucking superheroes but hori has done a pretty good job keeping several aspects of realism within it. my cousin and i have this talk often but it’s incredible and super interesting how hori has been able to take something so REAL (trauma as a whole, with all the league members) and portray it in a way that is relatable and realistic while still filtering it through this superhero lens and society. it’s brilliant. they all deserve well written endings, dabi and tomura especially.

anyway sorry i’m going on a serious rant here and i am going to stop HAHAHA but yeah, i totally feel you. and it’s like,, i get it, in a way; i understand the appeal of everything ending super happy and warm and feel good, but for me personally, i would rather things end in a way that hurts but is well executed, you know? i’ll take that over bad writing any day. the aizawa/mic/shirakumo | kurogiri storyline is SUPER interesting and they too deserve a properly written ending, even if it’s painful!!!!!

anyway moving on yeS HE’S SO TINYYYYY ugh i love how he’s like, taller than rei + fuyumi by a decent amount but so much shorter than enji and natsuo it just 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 it makes my heart !!!!! explode <3 he’s so cute <3 he really is his momma’s son like look at him!!!!!!!! he looks like her so much 🥺🥺🥺

[sinisterlutist]

Hello it me Pokemon ask meme 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 13, 14, 21, 22, 65, 66, 74. 75, 76

YES YES YES I AM QUAKING WITH EXCITEMENT THESE ARE SO MANY :D!!!!!

For convenience’s sake I’m gonna use a readmore cause theres many lol

5. Favorite trainer

Well, well, well, if it isn’t the question you knew the answer to already.

My absolute favorite trainer is my good merchant buddy Volo.

He’s one of the most nuanced characters I’ve ever seen come out of pokemon games, especially in recent years. Yes, he made some dumb decisions, but he’s so completely human. He laments the way the world is, the terrible things that happen, and he acknowledges that that probably happens to everyone. He was so tired before Arceus rubbed his loss in his face. When he talks about how troubled he’s been, asks about our dreams.

But no matter what else he may or may not have done, he loves his Togekiss, and I will stand by that with my whole heart. There’s a photo of the two of them in Jubilife Village. That photo was there before we came, and it has stayed there long after Volo left. There’s a lot more I could get into here, but, well, that’s a post for another time. Volo’s my favorite. ♡

(Side note— you know, if I had a nickel for every time gamefreak made a pokemon game where I ended up liking the long-haired male rival who teams up with a legendary dragon-type, asks you a question about dreams and then disappears, I’d have two nickels. Which isn’t a lot but it’s weird because it happened twice.)

6. Least favorite trainer

I am going with people FROM THE GAMES for this question because Ash is easy prey and I don’t care for the show in general— outside of the ever wonderful Team Rocket.

Shauna, from XY. XY had a really cool concept for a little friend group, even allowing you to give yourself a nickname from them. The execution was… less than stellar. Shauna felt sort of forced onto the player, at least to me. She annoyed me and I already didn’t want anything to do with her by the time you got to Parfum Palace, where she only irritated me more. The other members of the group, including your rival-proper, were more enjoyable, and felt more like they were friends with each other.

7. Favorite gym leader

There’s a loooot of really good ones I could use for this question, particularly some of the cool Unovan ones. There’s also Valerie, the Actual Moth from XY. But no. I have to go with Opal, Galar’s Fairy leader.

There’s nothing better than a spunky old lady who WILL catch you off guard and can move faster than you if she needs to. She was one of 5 characters in SwSh that I truly liked. Her help for Bede’s character arc was great, and frankly I don’t see nearly enough appreciation for this wild old fairy grandma. Opal’s awesome.

8. Least favorite gym leader

*walks on stage, taps mic* Whitney. *walks off stage*

9. Favorite e4 member

Gotta go with my buddy Grimsley! There’s nothing quite like having a gambler in your e4 with The Cool Uncle vibes. He really does seem like a chill guy, and I liked that he showed up in Alola, too. Runner up is Shauntal, purely bc her e4 chamber has the Most Vibes I have ever seen.

13. Favorite antagonist team

Team Plasma, hands down. The way that gen V handled the nuances of individuals within Plasma— characters you fight ONCE and never see again— was phenomenal, shown even further in BW2, when some of them changed their ways, and devoted themselves to fixing wrongs in the world. Others doubled down and stayed with Plasma, even after the truth was revealed. It was fascinating to see so much character put into the people of Unova, antagonist team nobodies included.

Plus they have an absolute banger of a battle theme.

14. Least favorite antagonist team

Does. Is Team Yell even considered an antagonistic team? They didn’t DO anything, they’re just bunch of hyped up fanboys (and girls) for you to get xp off of. SwSh made a lot of lousy decisions, as far as I’m concerned, and Team Yell was a big one.

21. Favorite legendary/mythical

Favorite legendary… well, for a long time it was Rayquaza, because Emerald was the first one I played, and therefore, Rayquaza was the first legendary I caught. Now, more correctly, I name Dawn Wings Necrozma (& more specifically its shiny version) as my favorite legendary. The colors are beautiful and it has SUCH a cute face. I’m delighted by it. (Special mention to Wo-Chien, because even though I haven’t played SV yet I LOVE that spooky grass snail, it’s got a cryptid feel to it that pokemon’s been kinda lacking.)

Favorite mythical… hmm, well, Shaymin is one of my favorite older ones, love a good hedgehog, but really I think this title is shared between Marshadow and Zeraora. I got so attached to Zeraora when it was released, and Marshadow is just a little toasty guy. I wish they had some lore attached to them, though.

22. Least favorite legendary/mythical

Hmmm… probably a draw between Enamorus and Palkia (and particularly Origin Palkia) for legendary. They’re just kinda ugly. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

As for mythical… there’s been several that I’m just kinda “meh” on, but… nah, y’know what, I’m gonna be petty on this one. Arceus itself, for crimes against me, Volo, and possibly Ingo. I was indifferent to Arceus before, but y’know what? I don’t like that space horse. It’s rude, and the only time it calls is to ask me to fight its gauntlet in my sleep.

65. Favorite pokemon movie

Alright it’s time to come clean, I’ve watched exactly 2 pokemon movies, 1 & 2 (the MewTwo and Lugia ones). Of the two, seeing as it’s been a while since I’ve watched either, PROBABLY the Lugia one. The music was so pretty.

66. Least favorite pokemon movie

So you would think by merit of having only watched two movies, that my least favorite should be the one I didn’t use for the last question. It’s not. It’s the one where Pikachu speaks. Like in English. (I do NOT mean Detective Pikachu, I would like to see that one someday. I mean the one with Pikachu speaking to Ash.) I saw the clip of it speaking, and decided then and there I would not be watching it.

74. Favorite Alolan version of a first-gen pokemon

Ooh, there’s a couple of these I like, but ohhh overall goes to the Alolan Sandshrew/Sandslash line! I’ve had an affinity for that little dude since I first played Emerald :) The Alolan versions look really cool and smooth and that little igloo pangolin is going places!

75. A pokemon you think is overrated

The easy answer to this is Pikachu. I’m so tired of the yellow rat in the spotlight. I was utterly delighted when its cry was put back in PLA, where it was treated just like any other pokemon. It’s not even that I hate the thing, it’s the ridiculous oversaturation. Pokemon Center has released a lot of really cool things that would totally pique my interest— were they not slathered in Pikachu shapes.

Balloon Pikachu is pretty cute though.

76. A pokemon you think is underrated

Uhhh, well, I’m not entirely sure, but… I like Hoennian Linoone. I don’t see a lot about Linoone, but it’s a good little badger and you can teach it Surf, which gives me the WONDERFUL mental image of riding my little badger around in the water :). Also very memorable for me was fighting Norman’s Linoone in Emerald, cause that thing was a tank. Currently I have a couple of Hoennian Linoones, one from X named Azi, and a shiny one I found in the Max Lair in SwSh named Kabochai (Pumpkin Tea, for his lovely color)

…. I am so sorry this took so long to answer, hoogh, but it’s done, and I had a lot of fun with it!!

As always, feel free to send in more!

「x」

[watching-pictures-move]

Movie Review | The Delta Force (Golan, 1986)

Just wanna stress that my enjoyment of certain movies has no bearing on my personal political views. Okay, everybody heard that? Good. Yeah, I can’t defend why I love this movie so much, but it’s pretty much the ultimate Cannon Films joint for me alongside Death Wish 3. (There are a bunch of movies from the studio I like about as much, but they don’t quite represent its essence to the same extent for me.) Anyway, this movie absolutely should not work but it does. The first half is in the vein of a disaster movie executed with brazenly exploitative panache, packed to the gills with graying actors hamming it up while sweating profusely and shouting or being shouted at by their captors, with two notable exceptions.

Robert Forster as the lead terrorist and Hanna Schygulla as a German stewardess are both legitimately great in this. Forster has the tricky task of playing the entirely unsympathetic villain and doing it in brownface, but for what it’s worth, he turns him into a real human being with motivations and nuances instead of the purely hateful racial caricature the character could have been in lesser hands. And Schygulla similarly brings some depth to a character who could have just been a shrieking victim. I don’t know what it says that I’ve barely seen any of her Fassbinder movies but have seen this one several times.

The second half takes a hard swerve into run and gun action territory, a decision that likely made no sense except in Menahem Golan’s galaxy brain, and we’re better off for it. It helps that unlike most other Chuck Norris action movies, it’s more about the team dynamic than trying to pretend he’s cool, so you get your share of Lee Marvin and Steve James kicking all kinds of ass alongside the usual over the top Norris antics. It also helps that Golan has a great feel for location shooting and just does not let up during the final hour. It feels like we get maybe a minute or two at most in between the constant machine gunning and rockets going off while the heroes are zipping around in their heavily armed dune buggies and motorcycles. Plus you get the ultra catchy Alan Silvestri theme. Horrible for you, but very tasty.

[oceangenasi]

playtest, level one, nat 20, and dice!

Playtest: What class (or subclass) do you want to try out?

I’ve played almost every class for at least a handful of sessions by now — the only ones I haven’t tried are druid and artificer. But I’m absolutely not interested in playing a druid and probably never will be. Too much to keep track of.... I say as my wizard hits level 12 and nears 150 spells in her spellbook.

I would have liked to develop Oren, my Battle Master Fighter, a bit more. I was looking forward to a very crunchy & strategic melee build — the opposite of my paladin’s reckless & enthusiastic whacking technique. But Oren’s party TPKed after only four levels 😔

I've also got a barbarian that would have been fun to try, but the campaign died out pretty quickly. I may bring her or Oren back next time I have an opportunity to join a new campaign.

~

Level One: What was your first experience with D&D? How did you hear about it? What was your first game like?

I mostly heard about it because my dad got back into 5e and was playing in a game with some family friends every other week! I very briefly played as a cleric at that table during a combat encounter with a dragon, which was technically my first D&D experience.

But also, when summer rolled around, my dad got a group together to play through Lost Mine of Phandelver, when I rolled up my dragonborn Oath of Vengeance paladin and really dove in. That first session involved the goblin-and-wolves encounter from the boxed adventure, and I made my first real character decision as Rion -- to throw a javelin after the one goblin who was trying to escape. Rion's hallmark was that her emotions, especially her anger, frequently drowned out her nominal devotion to the god of mercy. So I felt really good about making a decision in-character that I personally -- and Rion, later -- would find a little morally suspect, because it made sense with her personality.

~

Nat 20: What's the most memorable RP scene you've been a part of?

I've got a lot of treasured moments and can't really pick just one, so I wanna pick a few from some of my favorite campaigns:

Haven -- everything involved in Wormageddon, tbh. I wrote the first half up as a story here and still consider that maybe the best and most interesting session of D&D I've ever played. Although in terms of sheer memorability, the session a few weeks ago where the whole party collaborated to remove a cursed obsidian butt plug from the insides of our tiefling warlock does come to mind.

Basil -- oughghghghgghgh.... Basil trying to kill another PC, which he failed at, and then his attempt to escape, which he also failed at. Super super dramatic, kicked off several hours more of RP while the party visited him in jail. Really grim and emotionally intense, but also turned out to have some of the most surprising character moments I've ever encountered. Basil's life was spared, which neither he nor I had expected, and that set off a whole new character arc for him that I was very excited to explore.

Rosie -- Rosie devising a plot to publicly humiliate and discredit the evil NPC that had been lying to and manipulating the town, and then the execution of that plot. It went spectacularly well, and required the specialized skills of almost everyone in the party. It also was a chance to show off Rosie's mean streak, which takes a lot to trigger.

Fathom -- waking up after his death and discussing the idea of becoming Melora's champion with... Melora herself. He got a sick new arm made of water from it. I wrote about that here!

~

Dice: Do you have any dice rituals? Preferences? Collections? Does such thing as dice luck really exist?

Ahahahahahahaha—

I don't know who you are, anon, but I have to assume you know me, because yeah. I own, as of writing this post, 150 sets of D&D dice. I have so many fun sets -- metal, glass, gemstone, wood, sharp-edge, silicone, you name it.

I keep them in plastic apothecary jars in the front hall of my apartment, sorted by character palette! For example, Haven's jar is mostly pink and gold, with a scattering of rainbow because it suits her messy personality. I haven't taken a proper photo of the palettes in a while, but I'm always happy to show them off to anyone who asks 👀

~

Send me more of these asks please!! The list is here <3

[thelostgirl21]

For those of you still arguing that Kaidan does not outrank Shepard as an Alliance Officer during the Citadel Coup...

...he does.

Actually, being a Staff Commander in ME2, Kaidan Alenko was already outranking Shepard when they met on Horizon.

First, it is important to understand that, while inspired by it, the Human Systems Alliance does not use the exact same ranking system as the U.S. Navy / Marines. [Edit: I've fixed some (hopefully, most!) of the "he/him/himself" pronouns I'd missed the first time around... And that was... like... 90% of the time I was referring to Shepard. *Facepalms* Sorry about that! I'm so used to writing for M!Shep, that I instinctively say "he/him/himself" when referring to them (and my brain does the weird French thing of including the feminine into the masculine while proofreading, apparently!). If you still spot a non gender-neutral pronoun in there, please feel free to let me know.]

Therefore, according to the System’s Alliance’s own ranking system (that can be found in the game’s codex entries; I’ve also added that information at the bottom of this post, with in-game examples) the rank of Major (and, in ME2, Staff Commander) is above that of a Lieutenant Commander (Shepard’s own Alliance military rank) within the Alliance.

It is the rank of an Alliance Captain (Navy), not that of an Alliance [Lieutenant] Commander (Navy & Marines), that is considered as being the equivalent of that of an Alliance Major (Marines).

Meaning that, by the beginning of ME3, Major Alenko has now risen through the ranks to the point where he holds a similar level of responsibility within the Systems Alliance as Captain Anderson used to hold in ME1. At the very beginning of ME1, Captain Anderson was a Navy Captain, and the Commanding Officer (C.O.) of the SSV Normandy.

Lieutenant Commander Shepard was his Executive Officer (X.O.).

And Staff Lieutenant Alenko was head of the ship's Marine detail*

By the beginning of ME3, Major Alenko is now a Marine Major, and the Commanding Officer (C.O.) of the 1st Special Operations Biotic Company, a covert operations unit of the Systems Alliance.

*Note: I just discovered yesterday what “Marine detail” means, and I just have to say Kaidan’s position on the Normandy is ridiculously cool! 

Basically, it’s Kaidan’s job to determine which personnel position, assignment, or duty station each Marine should have on the Normandy.  While basing his decisions on the person’s professional milestones, taking into consideration the Marine’s personal aspirations and stated preferences, considering their marital status / family lives and responsibilities outside of the military, evaluating whether they have the proper qualifications for the job or require further training, looking at performance reviews...

They are described as the Marine’s “advocate”, trying to make sure that not only are they the “best Marine” for what their actual job requires, but that it’s the job that will bring said Marine the greater level of work satisfaction / align with their needs and personal ambitions.

So basically, after Jenkins was KIA at the beginning of ME1, it was Kaidan’s job to find a suitable replacement to take over his duties on the ship.

So, after Shepard wakes up in the medbay, and expresses that they’re glad that Gunnery Chief Ashley Williams was still on the Normandy, because she’s a good soldier that deserves it, and Captain Anderson answers them: “Lieutenant Alenko agrees with you.  THAT’S WHY I added her to our crew.”

He literally means “After seeing her in action, Lieutenant Alenko reviewed her file, checked her qualifications, past performance reviews, family status, her documented professional aspirations and stated preferences, numerous past (denied) applications for a transfer to a shipboard posting, and based on his very own assessment of Gunnery Chief Ashley Williams, determined that she was the single best Marine in the System’s Alliance for the open position we now had on the ship.”

I’d always assumed that Kaidan had more or less informally gone “Gunnery Chief Williams was really impressive down there!  Maybe we could use her!”

And Captain Anderson had essentially gone: “Sure!  Why not?  We’ve got an open position.  Let’s keep her!”

But I’d all but forgotten that, with Nihlus dead, there was absolutely no Spectre on board that ship at that point in the story, and they were thus likely bound by the System’s Alliance rules and protocols when it came to handing out assignments to fill the vacant positions available on the Normandy.

It’s therefore highly likely that whoever was in charge of the ship’s Marine detail (in this case, Staff Lieutenant Kaidan Alenko), would have had access to a list of applications of suitable candidates that had expressed an interest in serving on that ship.

And that, whenever there was a position vacancy, or a need to add a new position on the Normandy, then the head of the ship’s detail would have the responsibility of taking a good look at those candidatures, and selecting the very best suited Marine for the job.

As a Spectre, Commander Shepard might have had the level of authority required to spontaneously go: “they followed me home, I’m keeping them!”

But Captain Anderson most certainly did not. And, while he was the Normandy’s C.O. (meaning that he’d likely have the final say on whether or not Ashley got the position)...

Well, the person  officially in charge of finding someone to fill the position left vacant after Jenkin’s passing - after having carefully reviewed Gunnery Chief Ashley Williams candidature against those of other potentially qualified System’s Alliance soldiers - was literally Staff Lieutenant Kaidan Alenko.

And one would assume that the reason why Kaidan got his own position as head of the ship’s Marine detail, would be because he’d be considered as being very proficient at determining whether or not a given soldier is going to be the right fit for their job, and the best asset for their team.

So, when Captain Anderson tells Shepard that the reason he added her to the crew was because Lieutenant Alenko believed she was a good soldier that deserved a position on the Alliance’s most advanced starship, that was because it was Kaidan’s job to make such decisions.

He had to choose which Marine in the System’s Alliance would take over Jenkin’s duties, and he chose Ash.  Kaidan’s the reason Ashley was assigned to Captain Anderson (and later, Commander Shepard)’s ship.  He’s the one that made it happen and allowed her to advance in her career.

Should Commander Shepard have tried to do the same (i.e. be the one to request Gunnery Chief Williams assignation to the Normandy, in a context where Ashley wouldn’t already have been added to the team while they were out cold); then Captain Anderson’s most likely answer would have needed to be: “I’ll let Lieutenant Alenko know about your commendation, but he’s not done reviewing candidatures and making his choice among them yet.“

I don’t understand how anyone can call Kaidan “boring”. He's such a layered, fascinating character...

As he once told Shepard:

“I’m an enigma. I’ve got skills.”

Yes, yes you do... and, over 10 years later, I’m still discovering some skill-sets that you have that I’d never even suspected before!

And boy, am I pissed we'll never get to know about your run in with the vorcha mafia, five thousand credits, and a bottle of whiskey!

Still, no wonder Anderson was so adamant on Major Alenko being the one offered the Command of the 1st Special Operations Biotic Company.

Besides his very own unique history as a L2 and ability to relate to those kids, he apparently has an eye for military talents, and he likely trusted him to be a very good judge of character when it came to assessing whether those young biotics would be a good addition to the Company, and able to handle working with the rest of a team while on high risk missions without needlessly further endangering their teammates.

However, as a Spectre, when operating under Council authority, both Commander Shepard and Major Alenko are no longer bound by the Alliance military’s chain of command.

And it seems that most players do not realize it, but when Captain Anderson stepped down as the SSV Normandy’s C.O., Shepard did not receive a promotion within the Alliance military in terms of overall rank; but exclusively one regarding their position in regards to their assignment.

They went from being the ship’s Executive Officer (X.O.) to the ship’s Commanding Officer (C.O.), but they still remained an Alliance Lieutenant Commander, regardless of the position they held on the SSV Normandy itself.

I’m thus guessing that Shepard dying so shortly after the Battle of the Citadel, had prevented them from being promoted to the rank of Staff Commander (or even Captain / Major).

And then, in all of the investigations surrounding their claims of having been dead for 2 years, brought back to life through Cerberus technology, the time they spend working with them to hunt down the Collectors, Shepard destroying a batarian system (Arrival), the time they spent in detention between ME2 and ME3 after having been stripped of their rank, etc.  Well, I’m guessing the Systems Alliance never thought to offer them a promotion, either.

At the beginning of ME3, the Normandy SR-2 has been recovered by the Alliance, and is intended to be used by Admiral Anderson (who would have become the SR-2′s Commanding Officer).

With Earth and the Alliance Headquarters under Reapers attack, Admiral Anderson chooses to reinstate Commander Shepard’s rank as a Lieutenant Commander within the Systems Alliance instead, and puts them in charge of his ship (thus, stepping down, once more, as the Normandy’s C.O. in favor of Commander Shepard).

Therefore yes, Commander Shepard is not as highly ranked an Alliance Officer as Major Kaidan Alenko is. However, they were given an assignment as the Commanding Officer of the Normandy SR-2 by Admiral Anderson.

Meaning that, after the Citadel Coup, when Commander Shepard offers Major Alenko a position among the Normandy SR-2′s crew, accepting that position means agreeing to recognize, and respect, Shepard’s authority as the ship’s C.O. as well.

Regardless of Kaidan technically becoming the highest ranking Systems Alliance Officer on board the Normandy SR-2, the position as the Normandy’s C.O. was given to Commander Shepard by Admiral Anderson.

So, if Major Alenko has a problem working under the authority of a lesser ranked officer as part of a Lieutenant Commander’s crew, then it is his responsibility to either refuse the offer and request another assignment (something that Kaidan can do in the game, actually - he can be the one to turn down Shepard’s offer), or take it up with Admiral Anderson, to try to request a change in leardership.

What I also find particularly interesting, with how those scenes play out, is that in both versions where Kaidan doesn’t join the Normandy’s crew, he shakes Shepard’s hand, but does not salute them.

Otherwise, after the handshake, when Shepard tells him “Welcome aboard, Major”, Kaidan straightens up and tells them “Aye aye, sir / ma’am” with a military salute, therefore acknowledging Shepard’s position as his new C.O.

Essentially, Major Kaidan Alenko is not bound by rank to obey Commander Shepard’s orders or accept to serve on their ship...

It is only once he CHOOSES to join the Normandy’s crew and take that offered position that there is this obligation for him to respect that Commander Shepard is the acting C.O. of the Normandy, and that they report directly to Admirals Anderson and Hackett.

As a Spectre, they report directly to the Citadel Council.

And so does Kaidan.  I’m guessing that, should he ever wish to leave the Normandy, he’s got the required authority to do so, and would simply need to ask Admiral Anderson or Admiral Hackett for a new assignment.

He may discuss his decision with Commander Shepard first, out of respect.  But I doubt that Commander Shepard could try to force him to stay and continue to work under the Command of a lesser ranked Alliance officer if he wished to leave the ship.

The only known people that could deny his request for a transfer within the Alliance would be either Anderson or Hackett.

And, as a Spectre, he could very well go “yeah, screw this!  I’m out!”

So yeah, his being willing to take orders from Commander Shepard, and join the Normandy as a member of his crew regardless of him being a higher ranked officer in the Systems Alliance, only highlight the amount of trust and respect he has in Commander Shepard’s abilities and leadership.

Knowing Kaidan, he likely values Commander Shepard as his C.O. based on the man’s actual military, leadership, combat qualifications and training, rather than rank.  Not to mention his ability to recognize their more personal, human qualities, how much they care for their crew, and Kaidan���s own willingness to help them share the burden that’s been put on their shoulders.

I think that, in order to gain Kaidan’s respect and have him gladly follow you, you need to use the power you’ve been given by whatever position or status you hold for the benefit of those serving under you, and/or those under your responsibility, rather than try to dominate and overpower others with it.

Kaidan won’t hesitate to call Udina “a bastard” for what he perceives as him “selling them out”, express dissent when a superior officer is out of line, question the motives of those in charge, and often flirt with insubordination.

He’s one of the most NEUTRAL good characters of the series - letting his integrity dictate his actions first and foremost, rather than being strictly and rigidly bound by ranks, rules, or protocols.

His main source of worry, when it comes to Shepard potentially cutting corners, appears to be the price that THEY may have to pay in the aftermath.

He seems more concerned about the Council or the Alliance openly using Shepard as a scapegoat if things go south, and/or disavowing their actions and leaving them without support, rather than over Shepard themselves breaking the law in such a way that they would make innocent people suffer.

I've always seen him as trying to make Shepard understand that they won't let them go down alone with the ship, figuratively (and perhaps event literally speaking... He sure tried in ME2 until Shepard reminded him that the rest of the crew were also in need of his assistance and counting on them to keep them safe) and share the responsibility of the decisions Shepard makes as long as he also supports them.

And yeah, Kaidan did put his own happiness first when it came to breaking the rules of fraternization.

He even says that the galaxy will just keep going and the only thing that will never happen again is them. And that they are what's most important in that moment.

If it wasn't for how very lucidly attached to the Alliance he is (he sees the flaws, but still considers that the Alliance does more good than harm overall, and is proud of being an Alliance soldier / officer), I'd almost have been tempted to put him into chaotic good territory.

He's dedicated to "doing what's right" (the principle of goodness itself) and acting with integrity, but not so much to "honoring human / citadel laws" or even moral codes per say.

His moral code is very much about remaining true to your own ideals and who you are in a way that promotes the greater good, and allows you to be at peace with your actions. And he's seen constantly questioning his perspective of good and wrong in the world, and adapting what acting with integrity truly means to him (for example, when he was trying to come to terms with the fact that Cerberus scientists could also be good people).

So, I very much consider him someone that is more Neutral (chaotic leaning) good, than Neutral (lawful leaning) good.

Rules and institutions need to make sense and serve a useful purpose to him, and avoid getting in the way of him doing what he believes to be right according to his own personal moral compass that no one dictates him but himself. Otherwise, screw the rules!

It may also be good to remember that Spectres have absolutely no command structure.  To prove themselves to the Council, they have to demonstrate both exceptional abilities and self-reliance.  If they thought that Major Kaidan Alenko would be the type to defer to Commander Shepard’s judgment based on seniority and rank alone, I’m guessing the Council never would have agreed to grant him Spectre status in the first place.

Yeah, Councillor Udina was the one that submitted his candidature, but he couldn’t have actually granted him Spectre status without the Asari, Turian, and Salarian Councillors’ approval.

Meaning that they all saw something in his service history that made them go “Yeah, this is a guy that can totally go rogue, disrespect orders, and do whatever must be done for the sake of the greater good of the galactic community if need be.”

People that see him as some sort of “whiny, Alliance lapdog” seem to forget that  we are talking about a 17-year-old kid that continuously got in trouble with Vyrnnus for talking back (to the point where he started punishing the other kids to get to him), found a way to hack communications on the station to secretly contact his parents on Earth, after having been explicitly forbidden to do so, and angrily stood up to Vyrnnus after Vyrnnus crossed a line while bullying more vulnerable than himself.

Commander Vyrnnus taught Kaidan that some would-be leaders only cared about holding power over others, and were not worthy of being respected nor followed.

Major Alenko simply is not someone that can easily be intimidated into obeying orders, and/or be impressed by power or rank.  What will make him “fall in line”, is the belief that the one giving the orders is the very best suited person for the job.

So, when it all come down to it, I’m pretty convinced that he could care less about Shepard “only being a Lieutenant Commander”.

He cares about Shepard doing the right thing, and about being able to trust their leadership and intents more than anything.

And, while Kaidan Alenko may have all the required qualifications and abilities to handle his own command, too...

...this is not what makes him the happiest.

He’s a soldier.  He likes getting his hands dirty.  He likes being right in the center of the action, and making a tangible difference.

My own partner, whose personality often reminds me of Kaidan (or, actually, Kaidan’s personality often reminds me of him!), has been offered countless of times the job of a team supervisor or coordinator in his work as a computer programmer (systems architect).

Sure, it would come with a salary increase and some advantages...

And sure, he’s a rather assertive guy, with a talent for seeing the greater picture, quickly noticing people’s own individual strengths and resources in a team, finding ways to take full advantage of said strengths and resources while organizing the work to complement every skill-sets they have, and thinking about creative solutions to a problem that others might be missing...

But what he loves most about his work is the coding itself.

He’ll gladly offer his input (actually, nothing you do or say will stop him from voicing his opinions, suggestions, and solutions to an issue...  especially if he thinks you’re being inefficient in the way you’re approaching it, and/or overlooking some variables), but the thought of actually being in charge of the whole working team all the frakking time, and having to manage complaints, conflicts, etc. - when his time would better be used in front of the computer, figuring out why something isn’t working properly - is enough to drive him insane.

He has everything it takes to be a good, efficient, more than qualified supervisor and coordinator...

...except the interest and motivation.

The things that make him happiest at the work he does, lie within the programming itself.

Similarly, I very much perceive Kaidan Alenko as being someone that has every required qualifications, skills, and abilities to be in Command of his own ship or his own squad...

...but typically prefers being a soldier, getting out there in the field and doing his work without having to handle what everyone else has to be doing on top of it.

He made an exception for Admiral Anderson by indulging him, and eventually agreeing to assume Command of the 1st Special Operations Biotic Company.  And, from the way he speaks about his students, it seems that the nature of his job, and his ability to connect with what they are going through and nurture their potential as soldiers, fellow “freaks”, and human beings, ended up making that command worthwhile and an overall positive and stimulating experience for him.

This is one of the many reasons why I lament the lack of interaction between Kaidan and Jack.  They are both powerful biotics that were abused in the hopes of getting results and making their powers stronger.  They both share a deep seated hatred of Cerberus.  And they both ended up becoming teachers and mentors to younger generations of human biotics.

Beyond the potential for humor and entertainment, I think it would have been interesting to see how they might have related to each other, talked about their students, shared a few tips, etc.

But otherwise, Kaidan seems to be happiest while doing his own thing (ex: being sent to investigate certain situations for the Alliance / Council), or serving on a ship while using his skills to offer his support to his Commander, rather than being the one in charge of everybody else.

Given how he tends to be more task than ego oriented, I therefore really don’t think that he has any issues following the leadership of a Lieutenant Commander regardless of his own rank.

As long as he can trust Shepard to be a good leader and get things done, he’ll gladly let them assume command.

But during the attack on the Citadel, Commander Shepard is not Major Alenko’s C.O., as Admiral Anderson never officially assigned him to the Normandy, and after they left Earth in a hurry and headed for Mars to retrieve data, he ended up in the hospital.

If we want to argue that Major Kaidan Alenko was showing any kind of disrespect towards Commander Shepard by refusing to stand down in front of a superior officer during the Citadel coup (an argument that’s occasionally been brought up by those that highly disapprove of the confrontation)...

Well, I hate to break this to you, but per Systems Alliance military protocol, Shepard should have been the one to salute Kaidan, not the other way around.

But it simply doesn’t matter either way.

Because that confrontation was not an “Alliance Lieutenant Commander vs Alliance Major” issue.

This was very much “Spectre vs Spectre” issue.

You simply had two highly trained, experienced, and dangerous Spectre operatives that were interacting on absolutely equal footing, outside of the Alliance’s chain of command.

And they both had the exact same objective: Protect the council from Cerberus.

In the end, it all boils down to trust.  And to whether or not Commander Shepard has the required empathy to understand that Kaidan Alenko has every right to be human, to have doubts, to question people’s motives - regardless of how much he loves them - and to be scared to make mistakes based on his personal feelings towards them.

Kaidan (and Ashley) have the most realistic, healthy, and human reactions that one could possibly have to someone being brought back from the dead by a terrorist organization.

On Mars, he wasn’t trying to attack or hurt Shepard.

What he clearly told them was “I’m confused, I’m scared, I do want to trust you, but I don’t know how.  I’ve seen some of the abject horrors of what Cerberus is capable of doing, and the thought that they might have been using you, or are still planning to use you, against the rest of the Galaxy terrifies me.  I need to know it’s really you - that you haven’t been cloned, brainwashed, or they didn’t plant a chip in your head or something -  and I’m at a loss at where to even start.”

(I’m thinking that should they have discovered that Shepard had been altered in some way and/or was being manipulated by Cerberus, but was still in there somewhere, then Kaidan would have wanted to do anything he could to help free them from Cerberus’ grasp, too.)

And he has every right to feel that way, to be afraid, to be concerned, and to express it.

Actually no one owes any of their friends their “blind trust”.

If someone I strongly care about is doing something stupid or I disagree with, I fully reserve the right to oppose their actions and let them know I’m not on board with it.

I can trust that they are a good person and believe in them.  But I can also occasionally distrust their judgment and whether the decisions they are making are the right ones.

So by openly verbalizing his fears and doubts, what Kaidan is actually doing is letting Shepard in.  He’s reaching out for that connection they share, not shutting them down.

He’s almost desperate to try to explain to them how he feels, so they can open the dialogue and start figuring these things out together, rather than remaining alone in their little corner while allowing those fears and doubts to fester and take root.

If Shepard is able to understand that.  If they can reach back towards Kaidan, show interest in getting to know each other again, rebuild trust, and work through those issues, then as I’ve already demonstrated a little while ago, getting Kaidan to stand down is so ridiculously easy it’s almost laughable.

If they do cut themselves off from Kaidan following Mars, and never reach back towards him, then they are allowing all those doubts and fears to keep on growing...  thus leading to tragedy during the coup.

But yeah, anyone reasonably expecting Kaidan to just step aside the moment those doors opened (when he was fully expecting to see Cerberus operatives come out of the elevator shaft) - especially based on supposed “higher ranked offircer superiority” - is having utterly unrealistic expectations regarding Major Alenko’s personality and behavior.

Either they were too quick to dismiss him as whiny and boring, and thus kept him out out of every mission, skipped conversations, and/or quickly rushed through them without really listening and seeking to understand the character...

They are unable to perceive videogame characters as well-rounded people, but are rather exclusively seeking to immerse themselves in some fantasy world where every single person they encounter either automatically adores them or fears their superior power and influence; and those characters are something that should solely exist for their own entertainment (unlike reality, where they can more easily recognize that each of their friends have personal aspirations, opinions, thoughts, careers and dreams that exist entirely outside of themselves; and they never would realistically expect one of said friends to “drop everything” they are doing on the fly in order to blindly follow them into a private jet that’s being borrowed from a well-known right-wing terrorists organization instead).

Or, they literally have a God complex.

----------

Systems Alliance: Military Ranks (Mass Effect)

The Alliance uses a modified version of the ranking system that has been used for hundreds of years. Soldiers are classified into rank-and-file enlisted personal, experienced non-commissioned officers (NCOs), and specially trained officers.

The divide between naval personnel and ground forces (“marines”) is small. Ground units are a specialized branch of the fleet, just as fighter squadrons are. This unity of command is imposed by the futility of fighting without control of orbit; without the navy, any army is pointless. The marines, as a matter of pride, maintain some of their traditional rank titles; for example, marines have Privates and Corporals instead of Servicemen.

In ascending order of responsibility, the ranks of the Alliance are:

ENLISTED

Serviceman 3rd Class/Private 2nd Class

Serviceman 2nd Class/Private 1st Class

Serviceman 1st Class/Corporal

NCOs

Service Chief

Gunnery Chief [ex: Gunnery Chief Williams (ME1)]

Operations Chief [ex: Operations Chief Williams (ME2)]

OFFICERS

2nd Lieutenant

1st Lieutenant

Staff Lieutenant [ex: Lieutenant Alenko (ME1)]

Lieutenant Commander [ex: Commander Shepard (ME1, ME2, ME3),  Commander Williams (ME3)]

Staff Commander [ex: Commander Alenko (ME2)]

Captain/Major [ex: Major Alenko (ME3); Captain Anderson (ME1)]

Rear Admiral/General [ex: Admiral Hackett (ME1)]

Admiral [ex: Admiral Hacket (ME2), Admiral Anderson (ME3)]

Fleet Admiral [ex: Admiral Hackett (ME3)]

[bitsandbobsofwriting]

Magic is legal, Arthur knows The Truth and Merlin is... shit at explaining things:

Arthur demands a trip to visit the Druids, who are far more qualified than Merlin, so they can explain this whole... destiny thing.

I’ve written a lot of angst and Hurt!Merlin recently, so I just wanted to write something short and sweet and fluffy :)

SO.

Magic has been legalised, Merlin is Court Sorcerer, all the knights are alive and happy, Morgana is good, and the only thing Arthur has to worry about right now is what the hell to do about the rapidly growing crush he has on his BestFriend™.

After the dust had settled, Merlin had tried to sit Arthur down and tell him the whole story; all about Emrys, and the prophecies, and destiny. The King already knew about Merlin’s magic, and roughly how powerful he is, but that’s it.

But Merlin went so long barely mentioning it at all, not even to Gaius or Morgana or Lancelot, that he’s still not entirely sure what to say. Years of hiding and lying and trying desperately not to think about it, mean his brain now blanks when he tries to explain it.

After far too long of Arthur looking on confusedly whilst Merlin rambled on about dragons and coins and mental links and names, The Court Sorcerer gave up, and decided to just not bother.

Arthur, of course, decided that giving up was stupid, and made the executive decision that they would just go to the Druids, and someone who actual knew what they were talking about could explain it thoroughly. Maybe even allow Arthur to read the original prophecies.

Plus, it turned out that Initiating a Golden Age took quite a lot of work, so neither of them had had a chance to leave the city for weeks. They could do with the fresh air. And if Arthur saw it as a good chance to be properly alone with Merlin for more than half a candle mark? No one else needed to know, least of all Merlin.

~

It was a pleasant journey through the woods. The silences comfortable, and the conversations easy and filled with smiles.

Magic had only been legalised for about a fortnight, and after over twenty years of fear, magic users were still understandably cautious, meaning the closest Druid camp was still a two days ride away.

But that wasn’t a problem. With Merlin now able to use his magic openly, and therefor more able to defend his King, he found he was far less anxious about the trip outside the city than he would’ve been before. And if his good mood bled into the environment around them? Well... it was spring... surely no one would notice the extra flowers and abundance of butterflies?

(Arthur definitely noticed. But Merlin was still... wary, of performing sorcery openly, in fear of scaring the people who had been sucked in by two decades of propaganda and fear-mongering. Meaning Arthur sure as shit wasn’t going to point it out, in case Merlin stopped.)

It was around noon, and the sun was shining down on them when Merlin pulled his horse to a stop. He dismounts effortlessly, and hands a confused Arthur his reins. At Arthur’s raised eyebrow, Merlin sighs and speaks quietly:

“The camp is about two minutes further on but... the change in the law was only recent, and...-”

He bites his lip and looks away, worrying Arthur slightly, before continuing:

“-well, chainmail and red capes still make them a little nervous. I’ve already warned their leader that we’re coming-”

He taps his temple briefly:

“-but I should go ahead and explain properly.”

Arthur nods in understanding, and gives Merlin a comforting smile:

“I completely understand, Merlin. How long do you want me to wait, or will you come back to get me?”

Merlin returns his smile, before saying:

“Just wait ten minutes then follow me, straight down the path. Bring the horses, there’ll be somewhere to tie them there. You shouldn’t run into any trouble this close to a camp, but you do have a track-record so-”

Merlin laughs at Arthur’s indignant expression, but continues before he can interrupt him:

“-if you do, just yell. We won’t be too far away, we’ll hear you.”

Arthur rolls his eyes fondly and shoos Merlin away. The Warlock laughs as he turns and continues down the path on foot. Just before he disappears behind a large bush, he turns around again, a slightly concerned expression on his face:

“I might look a bit... different? But don’t mention it, they’re quite fond of me... uh... dressing the part.”

Arthur huffs out a laugh before saying:

“I’m sure I won’t forget what you look like in ten minutes, Merlin. Go.”

Merlin hums thoughtfully, and turns back around, disappearing into the trees and leaving Arthur to his thoughts.

After a few moments, he removes his cloak, tucking it into a saddlebag. He also, after only a little hesitation, removes his sword, strapping it to his saddle. It was still visible and easily within reach, but not so threateningly on display at his hip.

He was entering these people’s home, after personally wielding the sharp edge of their persecution for almost a decade; the least he could do was make them as comfortable as possible.

He hadn’t mentioned it to anyone, not even Merlin, but he had a feeling that this meet was going to end up being about more than the prophecies. Peace had been harboured, magic had been legalised, but like Merlin had pointed out, things were still a little tense. This meeting was a way to show the Druids that Arthur meant it, that his whole heart was behind this change. The he was not his father.

Arthur was a little nervous (not that he’d ever admit that), this was important. Not just to him and the kingdom, but to Merlin personally. He had to get this right. One of the only things that Arthur had managed to get out of Merlin, to do with the whole destiny thing, was that it was finished. It was done.

If Arthur messes this up, not only will it ruin the peace they had been working so hard for... then Merlin might leave. He has no reason to stay after-all, he’s done his job. So Arthur has to get this right, has to impress everyone, now more than ever, because if he fails and the Druids all leave Camelot, then Merlin would leave with them.

And that thought was... unbearable.

He counts down the minutes, getting more and more tense. He tried to distract himself by thinking about what Merlin had said, “dressing the part” what does that even mean?

But it doesn’t work. Soon enough his brain is throwing thought after paranoid thought at him, about all the possible ways Merlin could tell Arthur he hated him, and leave forever and ever.

Arthur rubbed his eyes harshly, muttering to himself about how he really should’ve accepted the “relaxing tea” Gaius had offered him before they left. Other than Merlin, the old physician is the only one who ever seems to know what he needs in the moment, Arthur should definitely learn to listen to him more.

He finally reaches zero in his mental countdown, and sighs before standing from where he’d sat on a fallen log. He’d allowed the horses to wander a bit but they were trained to stay close by, so he has no problem gathering their reins again and leading them slowly down the path Merlin had followed.

All Druid camps were different. Some moved around constantly, some stayed fairly still. Some were huge, acres large with hundreds of people, others were small, only ten people or so. Some were occupied by mostly the sick and elderly, others were full of the young and adventurous, and others were family orientated.

And of course it was rare, according to Gaius, that someone would stay in the same camp their whole life. The Druids were a nomadic people, always shifting, drifting, wandering. Following a constantly tugging thread in their hearts, going where nature beckoned them.

According to Merlin, this specific camp was pretty small (around twenty adults) but it was also a fairly familial group, meaning lots of children. And if that didn’t make Arthur nervous (it definitely did) then nothing would.

Arthur didn’t have much experience with children, and definitely had no concept of how to act around them, especially Druid children.

After about a minute of walking, Arthur could hear loud laughter and quiet conversations floating through the trees. He slowed his pace; trying to appear unthreatening and friendly, or to delay the inevitable, he’s not quite sure.

He finally breaks through the treeline to see that... no one is even looking in his direction.

It was the middle of the day, so the camp was busy, people milling about everywhere, most of the tents open, various jobs getting done throughout the clearing.

But what immediately drew Arthur’s eye, was the source of the laughter.

The King looked across the clearing to see Merlin, in a whole new wardrobe, and a whole new light.

The man had changed from his simple travellers clothes (basically the clothes he’d worn as a manservant, just a bit newer and cleaner.) into a loose, white, lace up shirt (sleeves rolled up, which Arthur absolutely did NOT find himself staring at, thank you very much.) paired with slim black trousers.

But what was most striking, was the deep blue cloak billowing behind him, and the silver crown on his head. It was delicate, as if forged with vines and leaves and feathers, but it was oh so Merlin.

Arthur stayed at the edge of the clearing, glad that no one had noticed him; allowing him to stare in reverence at his best friend.

He was surrounded by young children, all laughing joyously as his eyes glowed golden and he waved his hands around. He needn’t mutter spells as he smiled widely, willing butterflies and bees to manifest in the air around him.

One of the younger children held his arms in the air and made grabbing motions with his hands. Merlin bent over and pulled him up into the air without a moment of hesitation, spinning him around on the spot (much to the kid’s enjoyment, who giggled outrageously), before settling him on his hip.

He used one hand to support the kid’s weight (when did Merlin get so strong??), and used the other to summon flowers around the feet of the rest of the children.

A fond smile spread across Arthur’s face as he saw them run around exuberantly, gathering the flowers in chubby hands to present to parents and siblings and friends.

Arthur laughed softly as he saw Merlin reply enthusiastically to something that the boy on his hip had said, and a second later, the child had a butterfly perched on the end of his nose. 

Arthur is broken from his concentration, jumping a foot in the air when a soft hand lands on his shoulder from behind.

He whips his head around, just about managing to stop himself from yelping and reaching for where his sword usually is at his hip.

He calms his breathing as his eyes find the friendly face of a Druid, an amused smile on his face. Arthur returns his smile, a tad shakily, suddenly feeling the nerves again, and nods his head respectfully.

The man keeps his hand on Arthur’s shoulder, but looks towards Merlin in the clearing, before softly saying:

“He’s quite something, your Emrys, isn’t he?”

Arthur gulps, also looking back at Merlin as he replies with a chuckle that was only slightly forced:

“He’s more yours than mine, especially like this, but yes, he is something special.”

The Druid laughs disbelievingly, and Arthur turns to look, a confused expression on his face as he listens to his reply:

“Definitely not. He’s always belonged to you more than he’s belonged to us-”

He stops laughing to look at Arthur, eyes sparkling with friendly mirth as he continues:

“-prophecy or no, he had a... well... a pre-carved place among the Druids, but he still chose to carve his own space by your side. I think that speaks volumes about where he truly belongs, or at least where he wants to belong, don’t you?”

Arthur doesn’t really have a response to that as he stares at the man with barely concealed bafflement, but luckily, before the silence stretches too long, the Druid gestures to the clearing:

“Come. Everyone is excited to meet you, though I warn you, the children in this camp can be rather energetic, as you’ve already seen.”

Arthur gulps and nods, following him into the centre of the camp.

Everyone’s attention is quickly caught by The King’s presence, and someone comes over to wordlessly take the horse’s reins from him.

The adults bow their heads slightly in respect, giving him soft smiles, and the children fidget on the spot, wide grins on their faces as they whisper conspiratorially to each other.

The boy in Merlin’s arms wiggles, and he gets put down. He rushes over to Arthur, grabbing his hand with a toothy grin and dragging him over to Merlin and the other children.

Merlin hides a laugh behind his hand as Arthur’s eyes widen, and his face goes pale. He thought this was going to be meetings and serious discussions and apologies, not playing with children!! What do children even like?! Swords?? Can he talk to them about swords??! Druids are pacifists right? So probably not??

He gets pulled down to crouch, and the children crowd him, all babbling at once, wildly showing him flowers and butterflies.

Merlin laughs at his bewildered fear for a few moments, before he crouches next to Arthur and holds his hands up, saying loudly:

“Alright, alright, you lot. Remember what I said?”

The children still, and a chorus of “Yes Lord Emrys” resounds from the group. With that, they stay silent, but still grin widely and bounce on the spot in excitement.

Arthur gives Merlin a stressed, but grateful smile, before looking back to the children. He takes a deep breath, before smiling at them, and saying:

“My name’s Arthur. Thank you for having me, I appreciate your hospitality.”

Merlin snorts at his overly formal tone, and has to stop himself laughing at the shock and fear on Arthur’s face when one of the younger ones loudly asks:

“What’s hosp-ee-tal-it-ee?”

Arthur furrows his brows, but luckily one of the teenagers steps in, quietly saying:

“It’s when someone comes into your home, and you’re nice to them.”

Arthur smiles and nods, and Merlin chuckles in amusement.

Thankfully (for Arthur) Merlin then stands and announces to the children that it’s lunch time, and to get washed up. They all rush off, and Arthur lets out a breath as he stands.

Merlin holds in yet another laugh, but tilts his head in confusion as Arthur’s gaze is once again drawn to the crown that rests on Merlin’s unruly hair.

Merlin flushes slightly when he realises what Arthur is looking at, looking to the floor and mumbling:

“You have no idea how long I’ve been trying to get them to just call me Merlin, but then they presented me with this a few months ago and I could hardly say no, could I?”

Arthur nods as Merlin looks up again, meeting his gaze. There’s a soft smile on his face, one that Merlin isn’t quite sure what to make of as he quietly replies:

“Hmm. Looks good on you.”

Merlin makes a surprised noise and his eyes go wide, the flush on his cheeks deepening as Arthur laughs gently at him.

Arthur puts his hand on Merlin’s shoulder, his thumb brushing against the skin of his neck in a way that was slightly more than friendly, but Merlin doesn’t pull away, so Arthur leaves his hand there as he looks around the bustling camp.

His smile falls into something more sad, and Merlin frowns at him curiously:

“Arthur? What is it?”

Arthur shakes his head slightly, not looking back at Merlin as he replies, almost whispering:

“Nothing. It’s just, last time I was this far into a Druid camp... I did terrible things. Look at this place, how could I ever have believed that magic was evil? It’s beautiful here.”

Merlin’s frown deepens, but before he can reply, a small hand tugs at Arthur’s sleeve, and the two of them look down suddenly to see one of the boys from before. He wore a confused expression, and whispered, as if he knew this was meant to be a secret conversation:

“What terrible things did you do, Mr King Sir?”

Merlin takes in a quiet gasp and widens his eyes, but before he can tell him off or lie, Arthur squeezes his shoulder, and crouches down in front of the child.

Arthur gives the boy a smile, and takes his hands, quietly saying:

“Well. When I was young, I was taught some things that are wrong, I didn’t question them, and because of that I did some really bad things. I thought I was being a good person, but actually I was being a bad person because I didn’t do my own research, and I didn’t know any better. But then I started learning how to be better, and now I do everything in my power to be an actual good person.-”

Arthur looks up at Merlin with a small smile on his face, before looking back down to the boy, who is hanging on to his every word:

“-Your Emrys is helping me with that. You see, he’s the best person I’ve ever met, and he’s helping me be more like him.”

Arthur resists the urge to look back at Merlin as he feels a firm, but shaky hand on his back, and instead looks at the child as he thinks over Arthur’s words. His face breaks into a grin, and Arthur returns the smile as the boy says:

“He’s the best isn’t he? I wanna be like him when I grow up!”

Arthur ruffles his hair, and replies quietly:

“Yeah kid, me too.”

The boy gives him a toothy grin, before running off once again, and Arthur lets out yet another breath he had been holding before standing up.

Merlin’s hand remains on his shoulder, and Arthur regrets meeting his gaze the moment he turns his head. But he also can’t rip his eyes away from the teary expression of awe and bewildered happiness on his face.

Merlin lets out a gentle laugh at Arthur’s apprehensive face before shaking his head, and looking back at him once again, this time amusement on his face:

“The best person you’ve ever met, huh?”

Arthur rolls his eyes and blushes deeply, pushing Merlin’s hand off his shoulder as he mumbles a flustered:

“Shut up, Merlin. I could hardly tell him the truth, could I?”

Merlin hums thoughtfully and replies with laughter in his voice:

“Hmm. That makes more sense, of course.”

Without waiting for Arthur’s reply, he grabs the King’s wrist and drags him towards a large tent in the corner of the clearing. Inside were two tables, one large, and one smaller and lower, both surrounded by benches.

Merlin directed them to bowls in the corner so they could wash their hands, before they sit at the larger of the two tables. Everyone over the ages of about fourteen joins them, the younger ones going to the smaller table.

Food appears, covering the surface, summoned from the cooking pots outside and the various food stores around the camp. Arthur tries to keep the wonderment off his face, but knows he failed miserably when he hears Merlin chuckle beside him. He punches Merlin’s leg under the table playfully, but that only makes him laugh harder.

He quietens when the man sat opposite Arthur stands:

“Today we have two honoured guests, our Lord Emrys, and the Once and Future King Arthur. We share our home, our food, and our welcome, for as long as they wish to stay. We raise our goblets to you, My Lords.”

At that, he raises his cup in the air, everyone else in the tent following him. Merlin smiles and nods at him, raising his own cup, and Arthur nervously copies his movements, comforted by Merlin’s reassuring hand on his knee.

With that, the Druid sits down, and conversation breaks out around the tent as everyone begins to eat.

Merlin handles most of the discussions, talking to everyone as if they were life long friends. Arthur is grateful for that, he answers any questions sent his way, asking a few polite ones in return, but Druid culture is so different to life in the city and Arthur doesn’t really know what he should be talking about.

Thankfully, the meal passes quickly, and after another announcement from the man Arthur now presumed was the leader here, the crowd dispersed, everything being cleared away with magic.

Not every Druid practiced sorcery, but they were clearly in a magic-heavy camp; Arthur could see it plain as day, everywhere he looked.

Merlin once again took Arthur’s wrist, leading him out into the sun. Usually, Arthur hated being led places, especially by the hand, but he found he didn’t quite mind it today. Whether it was because they were in Merlin’s domain, and Merlin was King here, or because of how nervous he was, or because of some other reason entirely, Arthur wasn’t sure, and frankly, he didn’t want to think too deeply about it.

This time, Merlin led them to another, smaller tent.

It had several comfortable looking chairs around a smallish circular table, which was covered in scrolls and parchments and old-looking books.

A few seconds later, they were joined by the Druid leader; he smiled softly at them and gestured for them to sit at the table. Merlin and Arthur sat next to each other, and the Druid kindly pretended not to notice them shuffling the chairs closer together.

The rest of the afternoon passed in a blur, Arthur having lost his nerves fairly early in the conversation. Maybe that had something to do with the fact that official meetings were his specialty, or maybe it was because Merlin’s hand once again found his knee, but stayed there this time. Who knows.

The Druid had introduced himself, and once more welcomed Arthur to the camp, before launching into explanations of the prophecies and destinies, and everyone’s roles in them.

Merlin knew most if it, and looked especially proud of himself when the Druid described in wonder how Merlin had changed the very fates of the Lady Morgana, Sir Mordred, and Arthur himself.

Arthur was definitely taken aback at that. Whilst Merlin had prattled on, making no sense, about his and Arthur’s destinies, he had never mentioned anyone else, and Arthur becomes increasingly glad he came here to sort it all out.

There were some bits that not even Merlin knew though. He wasn’t aware that the other knights, Guinevere, and Gaius featured in a few of the newer prophecies, and the Druid had an amused smile on his face when he admitted that he’d thought Merlin would have figured that out.

Arthur did laugh at him at that, and Merlin flushed before telling him:

“Shut up, or I’ll tell the others you said I was the best person you’ve ever met, and they’ll never let you live it down.”

Arthur narrows his eyes, and the Druid continues look at them in amusement as they bicker.

The meeting comes to an end just before dark, and Arthur thanks the Druid profusely, for welcoming him, and taking the time to go through everything thoroughly.

Another meal is had in the large tent, but when they leave this time, the clearing has been completely emptied. A large bonfire roars in the middle, and logs surround it, providing seating for everyone.

The evening is full of stories and music and magic, and Arthur once again finds himself wondering just how he thought any of this could be evil.

Even Merlin stands to lead a song. He moves around the clearing with yet another child sat sat on his hip, giggling as Merlin spins her around.

Arthur is surprised to learn that Merlin has a good voice, and stares in wonderment as he leads the melody as if it was what he was born to do. The rest of the Druids clap along, joining in loudly and harmonising and playing instruments in time with the tune.

When the song comes to a close, the crowd burst into cheers as Merlin looks back to Arthur, breathing deeply and cheeks flushed. The Warlock smiles widely as he settles the child back in her mother’s lap before walking back over to his seat, next to Arthur.

Arthur returns his wide grin with a soft smile of his own, and as the music continues around them, Merlin tilts his face in happy confusion:

“Why are you looking at me like that?”

Arthur just shakes his head slightly, smiling slightly wider as he responds without missing a beat:

“You’re beautiful like this. And you have an exceptional voice.”

Merlin flushes in surprise and looks to his lap, quietly muttering:

“I wouldn’t know about that...”

Arthur doesn’t look away, huffing out a laugh before replying:

“I mean it, Merlin. You just look... happy. Like you belong here.-”

He does look away here, staring into the fire with a thoughtful, but slightly mournful look on his face as Merlin peers up at him, curious. Arthur continues, even quieter, before Merlin can question him:

“-You know, I wouldn’t be angry if you wanted to stay. Here, I mean. I know magic is legal in Camelot now, but you belong somewhere like this. I would never begrudge you a home like this Merlin.”

Merlin laughs quietly, and takes Arthur’s hand, holding it in his lap like it’s something precious (it is, at least it is to Merlin). Arthur looks back at him in surprise, but doesn’t pull away as Merlin replies, still smiling:

“Home isn’t a place, Arthur, and the Druids know that better than anyone. Home is... home is wherever the people you love are. You are my people, Arthur, you and the knights and Gwen and Morgana and Gaius. My home is wherever you are. No matter my magic or title or destiny; my home will always be where you are.”

Arthur doesn’t let the tears in his eyes fall, but he does squeeze Merlin’s hand, giving him a tender smile that's returned without hesitation.

With the exchanging of smiles that any onlooker would describe as loving, the conversation comes to an easy close, and they spend the rest of the evening hand in hand, smiling fondly at the antics around them.

It’s late when the festivities come to an end, and Arthur and Merlin are exhausted, struggling to hold back yawns as they’re shown to a tent that had been set up for them.

Their bags had been removed from the horses and left in there, and the floor was covered in various blankets and pillows. There was a small trunk, for them to store anything they wished to unpack, and a few candles were lit, filling the room with a soft golden light and pleasant smells.

Merlin charms the tent to be soundproof so they don’t have to worry about noise (he may be openly able to use magic, but the idiot was still rather clumsy, and prone to accidental bangs and crashes), before removing his crown carefully. His cloak and boots follow shortly, and they all go neatly into the trunk, before he starts organising a spot to sleep.

After a few minutes, he realises that Arthur hasn’t moved from his space by the entrance, and Merlin turns around to look at him questioningly. Arthur’s eyebrows are furrowed, and he looks deep in thought as he stares at the floor, fiddling with the hem of his tunic.

Merlin walks over, concerned, and takes one of Arthur’s hands into his own. Arthur looks up at him suddenly, broken free of his thoughts, and Merlin raises an eyebrow at him as he strokes his thumb across The King’s knuckles:

“What’s wrong, Arthur?”

Arthur looks into Merlin’s eyes searchingly, but seems to find what he’s looking for after only a moment, and smiles. Merlin tilts his head to prompt him, and Arthur takes his other hand, before softly speaking:

“You know, I used to find the idea of falling in love frightening.-”

Merlin takes in a subtle deep breath, but Arthur doesn’t notice as he shakes his head, huffing out a gentle laugh before continuing, looking somewhere over Merlin’s shoulder:

“-The possibility that someone could have that much control over me; that I would willingly give another person dominion over my heart, my soul, my... everything, was terrifying to me. But I find I’m not scared anymore.-”

He looks back at Merlin’s shocked face. Arthur looks an odd mix of disbelieving, and happy beyond words as he continues, confident that what he’s saying is right, for the first time in a long time:

“-Because it’s you, Merlin. It’s always been you. And how could I possibly find falling in love with you anything other than beautiful?”

Merlin gulps, seemingly searching Arthur’s face for any hint of a lie. When he finds nothing but sincerity, he launches himself forward, almost knocking Arthur to the floor.

He wraps his arms around the blonde’s shoulders tightly, burying a hand in his hair, and his face in the crook of his neck. Arthur huffs out a laugh as he wraps his arms around Merlin’s waist, running a soft hand up and down his back.

At Merlin’s muttered:

“I love you, Arthur, more than anything is this world. My magic, my everything, belongs to you.”

Arthur pulls back, smiling. He leans forward pressing his forehead against Merlin’s, and cups his cheek softly with his hand. They stare into the blue of each other’s eyes for a moment, not in any hurry to move the moment along, Arthur running his thumb over Merlin’s cheekbone, and Merlin carding his fingers through Arthur’s hair.

Arthur takes a deep breath, before whispering, so quietly it’s a miracle Merlin hears him:

“Can I kiss you?”

Merlin nods infinitesimally, and the two of them lean forward, meeting in the middle in a soft kiss that could only be described as tender, and full of love.

If the stars shine brighter, and the wind blows warmer, and the animals of the dark seem happier that night... well... it was spring... surely no one would notice (Arthur definitely noticed, but he sure as shit wasn’t going to point it out, in case Merlin stopped).

~

THE END!!

This is the first one I’ve written in aaaaages that didn’t involve a dizzy/exhausted/sick Merlin so... yay me?

I just really wanted to write something fluffy, where there were no high stakes. No huge battles, or angsty confessions or anything like that, just a soft love story.

I genuinely got no clue what I’ll write next. I do have a few drafts and ideas floating around, but let me know if you’re after anything specific, I live to please :)

Like always, you wanna write this up properly with paragraphs and fleshed out stuff, go for it, credit and tag me :)

[testudoaubrei-blog]

“I’m loyal, that’s my whole thing.” - Scorpia, Season 4 Episode 6, Princess Scorpia

“Everything they taught us in the Horde about loyalty is meaningless” - Lonnie, Season 4 Episode 5, Protocol

Rewatching Season 4, I just finished Princess Scorpia. This is an episode that has always stuck with me, especially the A plot of Scorpia realizing how badly Catra has treated her and everyone else and deciding to leave. One thing I’ve been thinking about since I finished the series, though, is what this episode is telling us on a larger level. Looking beyond the character arcs and more at this show’s larger themes and message. Because this show is very much a show that says things, made by people who believe them. That earnestness and depth is one reason I keep coming back to it.

In the pull-quote above, and throughout the episode and before it, Scorpia defines herself in terms of loyalty. It is her identity - as she says, that’s what Scorpions do, they’re loyal. Her actions for three and a half seasons bear this out. When she first shows up, she tries to position herself as Catra’s new best friend, the one who won’t leave her and will stick by her no matter what. And that’s what she does, until this episode. She sticks by Catra through Catra’s increasingly villainous plots and erratic behavior. But she doesn’t just stick around. Until the portal, she barely contradicts Catra, and even afterwards, does so only furtively and immediately backs away as soon as Catra pushes back. For more than a year of show time, Scorpia has not just stood by Catra, or supported her, she’s actively assisted her in her most villainous and destructive acts. Scorpia is fighting by Catra’s side, eagerly carrying out her orders, and doing her utmost to see that Catra succeeds. But her loyalty goes beyond this practical help. Because for all that Catra loudly declares that she doesn’t need a new best friend, she consistently seeks out connection throughout the show, even when she’s at her most isolated in season 4. She needs moral support, and connection, and to know that she isn’t alone. Scorpia provides that, and keeps Catra going. Though Scropia isn’t initiating Catra’s various misdeeds, she’s assisting and supporting Catra throughout. On a personal, psychological level, the only word that seems adequate for this is ‘ennabling’ - Scorpia, sweet as she is, is Catra’s enabler. We see in the next few episodes what happens when Catra doesn’t have Scorpia’s support - she breaks down, and realizes that her actions really do have consequences, and that the affection she took for granted for so many years is something she can’t live without. But as long as Scorpia’s still around, Catra can’t make that realization.

Now I’m not going to say that Scorpia is morally culpable for Catra’s own actions. She’s not. Catra is solely responsible for her various betrayals, manipulations, violent outbursts and assorted murder attempts against...most of the rest of the cast (though being raised by Shadow Weaver sure as shit is a mitigating factor). But while Catra is obviously being a bad friend to Scorpia throughout, Scorpia isn’t actually being as supportive or helpful to Catra as she thinks, because Catra doesn’t actually need unconditional support, she needs people to be honest with her and express to her how she’s hurting them. She needs people who will stand up for themselves just as she needs to take responsibility for her own actions. This is part of why she and Adora have such a healthy dynamic in season 5 - Adora doesn’t take her crap, and Catra takes responsibility for her crap.

However, Scorpia -is- responsible for her own actions. And as I said above, she’s been with Catra every step of the way as Catra has attacked just about everyone and made war on Etheria. On a larger, political level, Scorpia is a willing participant in upholding the Horde’s oppressive system, and executing a war of aggression and colonization against innocent people. Speaking of colonization, perversely, she’s loyal to the very organization that dispossessed her and literally stole her birthright, then discarded it like a useless trinket when it was no longer useful to them. No one ever suggests ‘why don’t we let Scorpia connect with ~her runestone~’ until Glimmer does (and Glimmer’s motivations and arguments aren’t exactly forthright). Scorpia’s loyalty makes her an accomplice in her own oppression (like a bunch of the themes in this show there’s some interesting post-colonial stuff that the show doesn’t fully explore, probably because Noelle and the crew felt self-conscious about telling a post colonial story, or just didn’t know where to go with it). Interestingly, Scorpia’s loyalty to the Horde here parallels her loyalty to Catra, which has made her completely disregard her own wellbeing, which is the most obvious take away from the episode.

But I would argue that everything above shows that for Scorpia loyalty has been a way of avoiding developing her own moral compass. Scorpia repeatedly shoves aside questions of right or wrong in favor of being loyal to her friends and to the Horde. Loyalty has made Scorpia not only willing to accept her own mistreatment, but to willingly mistreat others, and to keep herself from asking any hard questions about what she’s doing or why. This is despite the fact that Scorpia is, by inclination, an incredibly gentle, kind and compassionate person. She’s willing to silence the best parts of her nature out of loyalty to Catra and the Horde. In the end, she also commits acts of violence and perpetuates the oppression of Etheria. And this is so insightful, because we see this sort of thing in our world all the time. So many oppressive institutions depend upon the loyalty of their members to keep them ‘just following orders’; so many abusive systems depend upon loyalty to stifle dissent and silence potential whistleblowers before they even speak. We see this in some of the most oppressive institutions and the worst scandals in our own society, and looking back through human history we see it in some of our nation’s and our species' most infamous crimes.

And when we look at the Horde as a system that Hordak has built in imitation of his elder brother’s empire, we see just how central loyalty is an ethos. Hordak himself is motivated entirely by loyalty to Prime - being a former clone, he spends the entire series not fully capable of accepting himself as an autonomous being (even when he acts like one and enjoys it, there’s some fucked up religious shit there that I won’t get into). He seems to have instilled this in his followers. The Horde Trio, Catra and Scorpia all hold loyalty as one of their highest values. Catra clings to it as her biggest accusation against Adora - that she was disloyal, as expressed in Catra’s perception that Adora broke her promise and abandoned her. Loyalty keeps the Horde Trio together and fighting for the Horde, and Scorpia with Catra. I think we can read between the lines and say the Horde runs on loyalty (as well as fear) and this is a very insightful portrayal of oppressive military and paramilitary institutions like armies of conquest and occupation and other instruments of state violence.

There’s another, related way of looking at how a sole reliance on loyalty as a moral framework has stunted Scorpia’s moral growth, and I think that brings together both the ways that it makes Scorpia willing to accept her mistreatment and participate in the mistreatment of others. Namely, loyalty in the Horde style isn’t just sticking with someone or something, but subsuming your own will into theirs. Following orders. Supporting your friend in what they do no matter what. Whatever you call it, it’s about turning off your own self - your self preservation, your self respect, your conscience, whatever other things you value - and just going along with what the person or institution you are loyal to wants you to do. And this is where Horde loyalty goes full circle, back to its origin - Horde Prime, the narcissistic self-made god who wishes to control or destroy everything that is not himself. Loyalty as Hordak conceived of it and as the Horde believes in it is a reflection of Prime's absolute control over all his domain.

In a way, self-determination is one of this show’s highest values (together with love). It’s at the heart of Adora’s 5-season, 3 year struggle to become her own woman and her own hero as she shrugs off one imposed destiny and then another and finally embraces what she wants. In a more negative form, it’s at the heart of Catra’s arc, as she finally accepts responsibility for her own actions and their consequences and starts working to make a world that she actually wants to live in, as well as admit to herself that what she really wants is love. And I could go on. This self-determination is existentially, obviously threatened by Prime chipping people, but it is also stunted by horde-style loyalty that demands unquestioning support and obedience.

Both the Horde Trio and Scorpia reject the Horde’s ideal of loyalty and walk away, but I think it’s interesting how they do it. Neither rejects loyalty entirely (not on the way Adora does) - the Trio, realistically, remain loyal to each other and simply walk away and walk out of the war (this might save their lives), joining the other disillusioned cynics in the Crimson Wastes. They reject loyalty to the horde and embrace a more supportive and respectful form of loyalty to each other. Scorpia leaves, but she actually comes to her crisis and makes her decision out of loyalty, and because it’s clear that her loyalty isn’t returned. The immediate situation - loyalty to Emily and Entrapta’s memory on one hand and Catra’s orders on the others - creates the conflict between loyalties that forces Scorpia to actually make her own choice rather than deferring to Catra. But she also reflects how Catra betrayed her loyalty to Entrapta, and thus how all of her friends’ loyalty to Catra is not returned.This is another point about horde-style loyalty - it’s one way - Hordak or Catra will demand your loyalty, but they feel no obligation to return it, which reflects Prime’s view of every other being in the universe as disposable. It’s only when she’s with the Princesses that Scorpia starts to find a new moral center, though sticking up for and protecting her friends remains important to her. In neither case, though, are these kinds of loyalty coming at the cost of either the Trio or Scorpia’s autonomy or ability to make moral choices of their own. In the very next episode, she says she wants to 'be A good friend' which is how the Princesses typically describe sticking together, which is a much more active and holistic concept than 'loyalty'. Scorpia confesses that she doesn't even know how, but she wants to learn and thinks the princesses can teach her.

There's another interesting counterexample to Horde Loyalty. Adora repeatedly breaks with the people around her to do what is right. First she leaves the Horde, then walks away from Catra by stages when it is clear that Catra is going to continue to harm other people and Etheria. Then she walks away from Glimmer, defies Light Hope and breaks loyalty with her supposed destiny and purposes as well as loyalty to the homelans she has never known. By season 5, Adora is loyal only to herself and the people she cares about, but she isn't constraining her will to anyone else's. For all that she seems like a rule follower Adora has a rebellious streak a mile wide, and she will do what is right, no matter what. This is what allows her to save the universe 3 times.

So the show’s argument is that loyalty is not a good moral framework to base all of our actions around. I don’t think it goes so far as saying that loyalty has no place in our ethics (being a good friend, which is such a huge part of the show, certainly includes loyalty, especially sticking with people when the going gets tough), but the show stresses time and again that being loyal to something or someone shouldn’t make you disregard yourself and what you think is right. Because it’s only by living out our own values and taking responsibility for our own actions that we can come into our own as moral beings. Moreover, if we insist on maintaining loyalty to institutions that oppress us and others, we can’t dismantle the systems of oppression that are holding us and other people down. (Yes, this is a pretty radical message, but I suspect that Noelle is some kind of anarchist? Anyway, it’s a thing.)

Okay, so that’s what I, a 35 year old, get from this kids show. I think it’s also worth pointing out that this lesson applies to younger viewers too, in their most immediate lives. Younger viewers will have had friends who didn’t treat them well, or might not have treated other people well, and who might have pressured them into participating in the mistreatment of others (this is kind of how bullying works a lot of the time). I think it’s important that younger viewers see how being a good friend never means disrespecting yourself or other people and it means a lot to me that She-Ra shows this in such a nuanced and realistic way.