#i'll do a part 3 because i have a few more women of history that im in love with

[34saveme34]

SMG3's search history - what could it be???

my mind isn't the best rn (I'm sick) but this once again on my mind

And I think it's a bit trickier than we think but I'll try my best to list the possibilities

some important things to note about his search history:

Luigi liked whatever he was looking at

4 understood it faster than Mario. note the "What, I don't get it-"

emotional reactions 3 tends to have certain things (will get into it more)

the fact that he only really acknowledged 4 when he went back with the memory wiper

Mario commenting "what the hell was that search history" I hate you, Mario, you could've said something more interesting about it, that could give something away off of it.

So yeah, these were the things I wanted to point out

since Luigi liked whatever he was looking at, and we know this man likes men the most, especially big men, I think we can easily assume it was something gay. I'm sorry Jenny SlipperyT truthers, besides not like there isn't any gay mc porn so, still a chance

HOWEVER

something really important I want to point right back at "What, I don't get it-" Mario's comment is very specific here. If it was like raunchy ass hardcore gay porn, he wouldn't say that. He would've screamed immediately, being freaked out. So it's something REALLY weird that isn't immediately obvious. However 4 and Meggy knew way faster which gives away that maybe whatever 3 was looking at they were more familiar with.

Now, there's quite a few things that people in this show we've seen freaking out over. One being especially true is fanfiction, but

and here comes in my 3's preference thing- he didn't seem to like that stuff either, not even for a single second

However may I present to you..... something that might blow your mind...... something you maybe didn't think of

THIS episode

and actually the part that the thumbnail shows

when they are looking at the cakes

you might be like "But, dude, he is also flabbergasted about it?"

Really?

this ALWAYS struck me as odd

right after seeing that stuff, Mario is understandably under trauma while 3 immediately goes into planning to make cakes like that of himself

and Mario's reaction makes it feel like 3 wants to make them like the last ones, like yes you can interpret it in a different way, but my way of seeing it is also just as valid

aka the idea that 3 likes some weird ass shit, perhaps sometimes things that might not come off as sexual at first, or even cursed in some sense.

Now... the point you are waiting for me to address. The fact that he only really focused on 4. That gives me gay vibes, Idk how else to look at it. The idea that he was mainly scared of 4 seeing his search history doesn't help either. It only makes him look more gay. Like Mario and Meggy were literally right there, he could've said "Hi guys" he didn't have any noticable reason to only address 4. So what makes sense? That his search query had to do with 4 in some way. No other way to go about it. There's a thin sliver of chance that he only addressed 4 because he did search this weird shit on his computer and not anyone else's. But I don't think that's enough ground to make it more valid than it being connected to 4. Like, this reminds me of someone denying 4's queerness saying that the line "what will you do when you bring over a girl and/or boy?" as boy relates to the homies in a platonic way, as if, dude, keep being homophobic.

so what do we know?

it's gay

it isn't immediately noticable that it might be sexual in nature

it connects to 4 heavily

Now I present to you...... The combination of wonderbread and smg4

the wonderbread kind of fetish thing when you don't immediately realise there's a fetish going on, which fits well with 3's rather interesting taste

which might for example suggest perhaps characters that look similar to 4 in specific situation, it can go many ways but it has to be gay, considering Luigi's reaction, canonically said he is scared of women (in SMG4's search history)!

so yes what I'm saying is that 3 has some sort of weird fetish regarding 4 that definitely looks gay, he would definitely want to hide something like with his life after all

Although I still find it weird how comfortable 3 was to search that stuff at 4's computer

also might I point to also the fact he APPARENTLY has his credit card linked to 4's pc as well, as revealed during the 2023 wotfi prep stream??? he is AWFULLY comfortable at 4's pc

I don't know why he would that, like... he isn't actually stupid, were his feelings making him this stupid? Was he getting some kind of sick pleasure out of doing it at 4's room? We may never know, considering how stubborn 3 is and also a big damn liar

[earlgrey24]

Top 5 underappreciated historical figures!

Thanks for the ask! This one was super fun, but also super difficult to answer. I've purposefully avoided mentioning the ladies of the French Revolution, since I have another question specifically about them lined up.

With that being said, in no particular order:

Fulvia

Anyone in the classics circle likely knows much more about her than I do, but I'm so glad I've discovered her through Tumblr! All of the things I've learned about her so far have been so interesting. It's incredible to see how much political (and military) power a Roman woman was able to yield despite living in a deeply patriarchal society.

(also, the part of me that loves drama really appreciates the story about her stabbing Cicero's tongue with hairpins after the proscriptions and Octavian's atrocious poem about her)

2. Émilie du Châtelet

Also hardly a surprise for anyone who's been following me for a while. Again, the fact that I've only relatively recently found out that there was a female mathematician and physicist in the fist half of the 18th century with such significant contributions to the field makes me almost feel as if I've been lied to.

She is special to me both because she was incredibly smart (she was able to understand Newton like few other people in her time and she spoke so many languages!) but there's also something about her writing that makes her feel deeply human and relatable. I've read some of her texts, and not only are they written in a beautiful prose but they're also incredibly moving. Her view on how to achieve happiness in life is one of the best I've ever came across, and her arguments for the education of women always make me feel so emotional...

...when she says that it was only after she realised that the circle of (male) French intellectuals accepted her among themselves and treated her as equal that she realised she too "might be a thinking creature"... I don't know, there's something about it that always gets to me.

Okay, time to introduce some male historical figures as well! This one is a residue from the time when I was really into the American Revolution.

3. Peter Stephen Du Ponceau

He was probably the only one in Baron von Steuben's original group that was able to speak decent English when they first arrived in the US to join the revolutionary war, which a) makes him quite important b) is kind of funny to think about.

But what I especially like about him is that he was a talented linguist who seemed to have genuine respect for other cultures, which let's face it, was quite rare in his times. While taking part in the American Revolutionary War, he recorded and studied the languages of Native American People. How cool is that?

(He was also potentially queer and I do have a soft spot for queer history)

Okay, guess should bring up someone interesting from Czech history as well. I fully confess that my own country's history is not necessarily my favourite area of study, but for her, I'll always make an exception:

4. Milena Jesenská

Probably most well known as Kafka's (kind of?) girlfriend/pen pal, but there is so much more to her story!

She was a writer and a journalist during the first half of the 20th century. She was really talented and soon made a reputation for herself, which let's face it, wasn't an easy thing to do for women in her time.

After Czechia became occupied by Nazi Germany, she joined the resistance movement and helped Jewish families to escape. She was later transported to a concentration camp, where she worked as a nurse and was said to have been "a moral support for other prisoners". She unfortunately died there when she was only 47. Still, what a life!

5. John Polidori

He's not necessarily my number one favourite person but I'd argue he is one of the most unappreciated figures. Vampires in fiction are massively popular but he rarely gets credited as one of its first authors. (Also the theory that Lord Ruthven, the charismatic, immoral aristocrat featured in The Vampyre is heavily based off on Lord Byron is not only entirely plausible but also quite funny).

Whenever I read something about the Geneva Squad, I always end up feeling kind of bad for him. As a foreigner, someone who was of a lower social status and - since he technically came along as Byron's personal physician - a paid employee, it just seems to me like he was never actually fully part of the group. Maybe I'm wrong, but to me, he felt kind of like a perpetual outsider. Lord Byron also got the credit for writing The Vampyre that should have gone to Polidori.

He was of course far from a perfect saint, with his drug and gambling addiction, but I still can't help but feel that he deserved better.

[orangerosebush]

AF Related Asks if I may:

- One event you would change within the series

- Which character you would sit down and have a meal with (and what would you want to talk about?)

Oooh, these are good questions!

I feel like my answer to the first one is different at this moment than it would have been in the past.

As much as I find the Atlantic Complex as a fictional mash-up of various different mental health conditions to be in (immensely) poor taste, I do think that the cast's reaction to Artemis during his breakdown was consistent with their characterizations. I don't mean this in a character-bashing way, however!

Artemis' friendships with the main characters throughout the series are part of why I love the books. They push each other to change for the better in ways that highlight immense affection and trust. Nonetheless, the strength of these bonds cannot simply give the characters different histories.

I'll use a few examples to explain what that means here.

Holly has to repress certain kinds of emotions and vulnerability due to:

1) the culture of the LEP

and 2) her precarious position as one of the first women therein;

Butler, conversely, has zero (0) mental health competence, as shown by his:

1) dealing with Angeline's breakdown by looking away from the fallout

2) training with the Academy being centered around the goal of him being able to compartmentalize during traumatizing situations for the survival of his charge

and 3) dealing with his own grief by refusing to participate in the world until the situation resolves itself against all odds (e.g., Artemis' 'deaths' in TLC, TLG)

Holly and Butler are individuals who care for Artemis so, so deeply -- and who are themselves individuals who struggle with mental health due to PTSD -- but because of who they are at the time of TAC, there would have been no way for them to have responded to Artemis more responsibly or with more kindness.

And honestly, I don't think that was a bad narrative choice for Colfer to make. What I would have liked to have seen (though I understand that narratively there wasn't room for this in TLG) was how Artemis, Butler, and Holly navigated the aftermath of the Complex.

We do see allusions to the ways in which they learn to be more conscious of each other. For example, when Butler picks Artemis up from therapy in TLG, he says, “Well, Artemis, how are we?”. Five words and the royal "we"! Although Butler still has no idea how to navigate therapy or psychs in his own life (as we sadly see in his assumption of the "blame" for Artemis' death at the end of the book), he nonetheless tries to meet Artemis where he's at with triggers at this point in canon. Similarly, we see Holly and Artemis visit the clone in the hospital at the beginning of TLG, and there's this quiet... caution, almost, that suffuses those interactions. Just as Artemis tries to be a friend to Holly in the way she understands the concept, so too does Holly refrain from joking about Artemis' behavioral quirks in ways that she might have before.

(Foaly and Mulch are certainly a different matter, though they too care deeply for Artemis, as he does for them.)

All that to say, I would have liked to have seen more of these character-based scenes in TLG, as I wasn't all that compelled by the swift transition to Opal's plot.

For your second question: I honestly feel like it would be great fun to take Angeline out for coffee. *Clenches fist* Queen I know I could make you giggle

[polarisbibliotheque]

Updating by writing you guys this huge post. I mean it, it's really long xD

Heeey-ho!

I know, I know, I couldn't keep my Halloween promise T-T

Tha Halloween gods are now shouting at me "HOW COULD YOU?!"

Die Halloween gods, slowly coming after me - black and white edition

As it has happened before, I'll be posting both Dante and Vergil's part during november. I'm still working on them, so it might take a while. Do apologise.

They will be here, just with a little delay. I do think Halloween should last more than just a few days, so screw it, until Christmas, it's still legal to celebrate Halloween at the Bibliothéque \o/

Now, now, for those who don't like too much talking, I'll be explaining a little bit below why I'm taking so long. Feel free to skip it if you don't want to read it, no worries ;)

(There's a "conclusion and TL;DR for those who don't want to read this whole novel" in pink down there if you want to scroll down to that point!)

As *not* expected, my health took a crazy downturn. I know I say it all the time, but hell, I've no idea what gives this time. I literally stopped everything. I spend most of the day in pain and the rest of it sleeping. That's it.

I have an appointment with my doctor next week, but I'm not too much hopeful. Last exams showed I have two ulcers - which means scarring and bleeding in the stomach - that can be literally anything.

Not gonna lie, I'm pretty worried it can be something worse than I was expecting, although it never even appeared to exist before, but well... My anxiety isn't exactly logic.

Secondly, as you guys might not know, I'm graduated in Law, worked as a lawyer for 5+ years before having a burnout and all those health issues (yeah, yeah, don't do what I've done, all that sort of thing). But something you don't know, and honestly probably only my close family knows and cares about, is that my graduation thesis was "The Conflict of Israel x Palestine and International Law".

I researched it for 3 years before defending my thesis, got a college prize for it, the professor who mentored me made a huge speech on how I proved "we women can do it on academia and research" and that my work was really nice. I'm not saying all this 'cause I'm boasting, I'm just saying I know what I'm talking about (because you know, who has never met a man who thinks their opinion is better than yours "just because" while you have a fucking huge CV on research and graduated with honors on the same matter but, somehow, you can't beat the opinion he just pulls out of his ass?).

All of this to say, I'm devastated by what's going on. This is more than politics to me. This was my thing, you know? I had a dream, stupid ~promising young woman~ dream of doing something with my intelligence to actually help people. To actually stop massacres of happening. I wanted to work at the UN, I wanted to speak with world leaders, to show people how much I can research and how much basic human rights matter so horrid things cannot happen ever again.

When the war broke and the bombings started, I followed the news. And then the news weren't reliable anymore. I started digging to find the truth - and hells, the truth is ugly and bloody. I think that's when all those last shards of dreams came crashing down. I thought I could do something, you know? Actually do something. But in the end, my parents were broke, I had to work to help at home, I kept sending my CV to the UN but I was never enough, and I just wasted my energy and health under the boots of someone who had more power and influence than me to break me and kill my career before it even started.

I felt so horribly powerless. So horribly broken. It seems stupid, but everything that is going on out there fells personal to me, I have history with it. And it broke me. Completely. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't force myself to at least watch the horrible things going on and try to like/share so the algorithm can make it reach other people.

That's all I can do.

You know, I have a lot of Vergil in me. For the things I wrote, I think you all can see I have a thing of "I never want to feel pain again and I want power so no one can never hurt me again" - that's why I think I want to kick his ass every time I see this fucking man being so emotionally constipated and ruthless because of his trauma. It's a way to protect himself, burning every path so he never feels powerless again - and I guess we all HATE to see the parts of our own personalities we hate the most in someone elese

So yeah. I know things took a dark turn on this one, but I decided to be honest with you guys - since I'm owing so many updates: the 2 Halloween fics, Nemesis and Survivor's Blood. I'm not really well currently, and only the gods know how much effort I'm making to keep it together... At least a little bit.

Physically, I'm like V. And I'm not even trying to be funny, every time I see that lil' goth twink I want to yeet him away because, hell, I'm MAD I see myself in him (mind you, I used to be more on Dante's side of the fitness spectre xD) - and not only regarding fitness, but tiredness. Falling apart. It's so... Harrowing. I think that's the word that fits the feeling better.

Mentally, I'm Vergil. I don't want to, I want to beat him with a stick, I want to yell at his face and kick his stupid ass, but damn. I get it. That crippling fear of not wanting to feel powerless again, to have people abuse you? The feeling you're trapped in your own body? The "feelings bring only pain and suffering"? The terrifying dread of discovering you failed at everything even with all your talents and never wanting to admit it? Check all of those. I hate you Vergil, but I get you.

I'm trying, though. I use writing as a coping mechanism and as a way to resolve many things mentally, but the last months have felt SO overwhelming I went back to my paralysed state of not being able to do anything and running away from things that remind me of all THAT.

You guys might be alarmed, but there's no reason to be, though. This is a ~moment~ I'm going through and I just need to sort it all out. I'm starting to get some warning signs of numbness, vivid nightmares of past issues, the paralysis, avoidance - but I've been there before. I just haven't figured out a way to pull myself together and I don't even remember how I did that once, so it might take me some time.

I don't know why, I had some sort of weird ~boost~ while thinking in the shower today, and I might know how to give the small steps to start getting back on track and gaining that momentum I need. This weekend I had to convince my mom to celebrate her birthday 'cause she's my Samwise Gamgee carrying me up Mount Doom and she wasn't in a mood to do so - therefore on monday, I have some things in mind to discuss with her and, hopefully, things will slowly go back to their place.

Conclusion and TL;DR for those who don't want to read this whole novel hahaha

THAT BEING SAID: I'm really sorry I can't deliver everything I wanted to you, guys. I didn't expect life to get so much more fucked up than it already was, but here we are. I just have to get used to the new pace of things, but it might take a while. My output of writing will be slow, but hey, after I can get out of that paralysis phase, I'll probably be writing more and posting more - 'cause I really, really love this. With all my heart.

(also, if you people see me active on my drawing thing, posting a bunch of things, it's 'cause I'm finally getting to look at all the art I've done but never posted and actually updating it and putting my art blog to some use I haven't in a while - I won't be creating new stuff. All old stuff I procrastinated as HELL and those will be some of my small steps to get out of this rut)

Now, as a last thing, I intend to use a video from a guy I always watch on youtube as some sort of guiding light in these trying times hahahaha but seriously, he has some really sound advice and he is so down to earth. Maybe someone who's going through some fucked up times can use his advice as well and unfuck their life too :)

That's it. I felt like I needed some raw honesty today. Like I said, small steps. This is part of it hahahaha

I hope you guys understand. There's nothing I love more than writing, creating something for people - and all of this, everyone I met here and every single person that uses their time, which is the most precious thing we have, to read something I wrote gives me the greatest gift I can be given. You guys have no idea how much I appreciate you and how much I don't want to disappoint you.

So thank you. I will work slowly and I will need some time to get my shit together, but I'll always be here. I'll update everything I need and won't leave you hanging but you know... It's like Dracula Daily. It starts in April and finishes by the end of the year, taking time to put the letters together.

Aaaaand, if you read Lord of the Rings, the whole adventure takes a year. We are very much conditioned to be given content constantly to keep algorithms happy, but I do have a view that humans (and art for that matter) can't keep up with being content.

Zygmunt Bauman said we live in liquid times, and made the theory that everything is liquid nowadays (for people who like sociology and philosophy, I highly recommend his books, I love him with all my heart), so we're not really used to things that are a little more... Constant. Earthy, perhaps. Slow, stable, never leaving.

I try my best to be like that, not like a liquid, inconstant, fleeting presence. I want the things I do to be part of something that will stay, and I like being someone that stays - and doesn't just flow away because everything has to be fast and ever moving nowadays. The Bibliothéque is to be like that, I think, a place that no matter what, you can come back after ten months and you'll still find me here, drinking some tea and writing stuff. And I'll be happy to see you again, for as much as you can or would like to stay :)

kinda like Dante in his lil' shop :')

That's it. Thank you for reading me mumbling nonsensically in order to tell you I will keep updating my fanfiction, even if at a slow pace HAHAHAHAHAHA

Hope you guys have a fine weekend and a good next week! I'll be always lurking around, but the creation process will be a bit slow.

Will still be here to mumble randomly about DMC and scream random things in the void though :D

*me getting ready to tackle life for the next months, going like "still heeeeeeeeere bitch!!"*

***

And I'd like to add that I searched for "Obi Wan" on GIFs to find some sassy defying mood too add here and one of the first hits was this:

I'll leave you guys on this note 'cause I'm still wheezing about it, it's so friggin' on point I can't EVEN

[direwombat]

🍎 🍋 🍒 (jakeli but also in general) 🥥 for syb 😈

a;lfda;sdfk thank you liz <3 <3 <3 answers under the cut for obvs reasons

🍎 Favorite type, looks and personality wise? Please specify the trait.

a very funny question considering *gestures to jacob and eli*

looks wise. apparently her taste in men leans more towards the "rugged mountain man" look. strong bodies, thick facial hair, tired eyes. her taste in women veers more on the femme-presenting side. she likes feeling strong and useful...protective. she's a wife guy. few things would make her happier than providing for another woman <3

but her tastes really don't matter because if you're clever and able to challenge her in some way, then odds are she'll be dtf. good banter is one of the fastest ways to get her to invite you to bed :)

🍋 Deep and slow? Hard and fast? What’s your character’s preference?

assuming she's the one being penetrated? Hard and deep. if she can't feel it or isn't walking funny the morning after then it wasn't enough. she likes the feeling of a cock/strap grinding deep inside her as well as thrusts so hard that they make her teeth rattle. bonus points if it's so hard and deep that all she can do is hang on to something for deer life as she gets mercilessly plowed.

assuming she's the one doing the penetrating? she leans more on the deep and slow side. she likes making her partners feel good and taking her time with them. she's a tease when she's on top and likes it when she's able to get her partner squirming and/or bucking against her to get her to go faster.

🍒 Would your character join a threesome if given a chance?

a;flkjasdf well considering she's part of two ot3s (jakesybeli and kitsybjake) she definitely isn't opposed to threesomes or polyamory. but it has to happen kind of naturally. she's incredibly loyal to her partners (assuming they've mutually agreed on pursuing a relationship), and when she was single, she wasn't exactly looking to be someone's third.

but with kit and jacob? well...she has the pre-established working relationship with (and lowkey crush) on kit, and when both kit and jacob get in cahoots and they both focus their attention on her...well...as if she really stood a chance lmao

and with eli and jacob? well, it's more the boys' history together that really makes it a full triangle of an ot3. i mean. a lot of it really is eli and jacob trying to one-up each other for syb's affection (eli genuinely trying while jacob (still trying) is more like 'haha ok honey i'll let you have some fun, but you are mine'). they're both trying to win her over while also engaging in some major "bitter exes with benefits" behavior <3

🥥 Does your character prefer condoms or bareback?

i mean....when having sex with anyone who had a penis, historically she has preferred they use a condom. she didn't want to get pregnant while earning barely enough to support her already existing family (she literally couldn't afford to have another mouth to feed). eventually she got on the pill but even after that she preferred condom usage because she did occasionally hook up with strangers for one-night-stands and didn't want to run the risk of getting an STI while between her combat tours.

but then she was lightly blown up and shrapnel just shredded her uterus and doctors told her she was infertile. she would have kept her condom preference (just because that's what she's used to) but she was having a dry spell after being discharged and then the reaping happened and she just went "well...might as well engage in risky behavior since i don't expect to survive this."

and considering...well...considering the cult is a "no-sex" one (according to joseph anyway) it's not like jacob had protection on hand when she came to him at the end of her Bad Day(TM). so they did it raw and she got to know what it feels like to have someone cum inside her and it gets her eyes rolling back. i really don't think the two of them ever use protection.

also just to branch this answer out even more (lmao whoops) but in the werewolf au, once she and eli decide to go steady, they get tested, and when they both show each other that they're clean, they start raw-dogging it.

so...tldr: on a practical level, syb prefers protection. on a purely physical enjoyment level....girl loves it raw.

[loveinkfanfics]

She left him wondering what was an exciting story to tell in her book. He bet she had all kinds of them since she worked with dead people and all. "Will do," he said, stuffing his hands in his pockets. "Nice to meet you, Angel. "Angela opened her mouth to correct him then decided against it. She didn't mind the way the nickname sounded coming from the handsome man's lips. "You too, Juice. You guys have my number if you need anything else, right? ""Maybe I'll take it down again,"

Omg yes! I love this! Thank you @juiceortiz!!! 🥰🥰 Taking it waaaay back to the first chapter of “Hands All Over”! :)

Writing wise, I was still finding my voice and still flip-flopping between POV mid-paragraph, which I sometimes miss doing but know it can get really confusing (as a reviewer pointed out). Also, personal life wise, I started this story in 2011 (it took me awhile to work up the nerve to publish it to Fanfiction.net in 2012) after my grandmother, who I was very close to, passed away. One if my favorite authors in another fandom (the Fast and the Furious) started posting a Sons of Anarchy fic, and I kept getting the notifications for updates. SOA Seasons 1-3 were streaming free and because I loved her writing (big shout out to xsparklesthemagicalunicornx and her SOA fic “Stylized Violence”), I decided to give it a chance so I could at least understand the characters in her fic. I fell in love. The sense of family (at least in the first season) and the love between the brothers was just what my aching heart needed to get through one of the hardest times in my life. I was obsessed. I binged the first three seasons and bought season 4 just to watch that too…and it brought me back to writing. I had several false starts with this fic with all sorts of situations (starting with Opie/OC, then I fell in love with Juice midway through season 1…it was that smile, damn it). I have PAGES of Juice/OCs that never made it past a few pages and sometimes I go back and read them and smile. It wasn’t until I met a badass mortician with braids in her hair, a great sense of humor, and a toughness about her at my internship at a local Coroner’s office that this idea hit me, and the rest, as they say, is history. Through this story, I’ve “met” some amazing people (readers, authors, etc), and I’m so grateful for it. 💕

 But, I digress, this part is Juice and Angela meeting for the very first time! Juice sees this attractive girl who’s also interesting and intrigues him a bit. There’s a mystery about her that kind of draws him in...

He wants to know what story she’s thinking about, wants to hear more about her. Other than Old Ladies, Croweater, and the occasional TM customer, I don’t see Juice as having much time to sit and talk to women. The club is all encompassing, and he’s all about the club. Theo Rossi has mentioned in interviews before that Juice wouldn’t have time to date, and I honestly, don’t think he’s all that far off. The club is everything to him. He doesn’t have a lot of free time.  I think Juice is also mildly impressed that Angela’s not fazed by the group of bikers (little does he know, she has her own connection to them in her cousin), and she’s not being overly flirtatious or coming onto them. She’s just going about her business like her boss told her to and brushing off the very weird thing that they’re doing like it is nothing…which to any normal person, digging up a body to use for something that’s definitely not legal would be cause for alarm. Him calling her “Angel” instead of by her full name is also a little test. Will she correct him? Will she let the nickname slide which kind of takes the next step in a sense of familiarity? She doesn’t correct him, which, despite his oblivious ways, is a subtle open door showing she’s interested in some sort of relationship. At least, she’s not shutting him down.  

And on Angela’s side, that’s most definitely why she lets the nickname slide. Here’s this sexy biker man who’s giving her this killer smile calling her by a sweet pet name? She’s not about to correct him. Same with the sly way she gave him her number. They’re feeling each other out. Angela was offering her number in the most covert way possible. She knows one of them has the funeral home number, of course they do, but she’s trying to see if Juice wants her number. If he’ll catch on to what she’s offering. And for once, Mr. Oblivious takes advantage of it and takes down her number for himself just so he has it. It’s a bit of a dance for the both of them. Also, Angela’s trying to make herself look a little more mysterious than she is with saying she’s seen “weirder shit” than them exhuming a body. That’s a lie (she tells him so about 40 chapters later in the story). She was playing it cool, trying to look nonchalant and enigmatic…and it worked. ;)

Plus, Angela’s been hurt by biker boys in the past (Esai), so she’s hesitant to go whole hog into it, and Juice hasn’t had a “normal/civilian” girl show interest in him in a long time (that he’s noticed. I’m sure there have been others, Angela’s just a bit more obvious). They both are intrigued by each other because they’re different (if that makes any sense). To Juice’s knowledge at this point, Angela is a non-club-affiliated girl with a stable but weird job that he’s intrigued by (probably from video games and comic books because I’m sure Juice has read his fair share of zombie shit and played all the Resident Evil games).  Being Happy’s cousin, Angela is used to a…tougher kind of biker. Sure, she has Kozik to be more light hearted, but she saw him through a dark patch of his life when he was struggling with addiction. Juice with his big goofy grin doesn’t quite exude the same commanding, somewhat intimidating presence as the SAMCRO boys she’s used to, which I think is what makes her more curious and attracted to him too. I mean, who wouldn’t be after being on receiving end of one of his smiles? ;)

Aaaaand I think that’s all I got! 🤣 Sorry for the rambling, but it was insanely fun to explore!!! I haven’t read the first chapter of this story in a LONG time. >.<

THANK YOU for the snippet!!  

[flying-elliska]

Book Review : One Last Stop, by Casey McQuiston

4/5 stars

(light spoilers)

Alright so this was delightful from start to finish. The concept, first of all, was great - loner college student with a knack for investigation, August, falls in love with badass butch amnesiac from the 70s who is stuck out of time in the New York subway, Jane ; awesome. I find subways fascinating, full of history and spooky vibes and potential encounters and dreary routine and urban poetry (I guess this feeds into my obsession with underground places lmao) and the story made full use of the setting. Plus something about the smut scene in an empty metro carriage at 3 am over the Manhattan Bridge was like !!! ok unrealistic but blablabla women being scared away from public spaces and queer ppl being assaulted in the metro etc etc. beautiful. healing.

the dialogue is funny, the two main characters are interesting and likeable and their chemistry has a lot of electric zing and realness to it. sweet but not desexualized or trying too hard to be 'wholesome'. something about their dynamic of two characters who have drifted between places and have never been able to really put down roots due to complicated family history, finding an anchor in each other (on a moving train no less!) really worked for me. plus points for making the love interest a beautiful, desirable, butch character (and Chinese American as well) bc i feel there is so not enough of those. plus it's nice to have a bi character that's an awkward virgin instead of a Casanova, that's also stereotype breaking. honestly good bi rep.

i also really liked the found family of quirky roommates. overall it's a pretty classic stories of early-twenties coming of age, becoming an adult, learning to let people in, putting down roots, daring to become yourself fully, letting go of your past, etc - but done very well. liked all the nods to queer history as well, how entangled it is with city life, and i loved all the 'missed connections' notes of how Jane made an impression on people throughout the years.

unpopular opinion but i was never the biggest fan of Red White and Royal Blue, found it fun but too tropey, kinda bland, and honestly overrated. (and the Disneyfication of US politics really grating. also i just read too many presidential AU fics that were like. better.) my fave part of it was the character of Nora, the foul mouthed witty friend, and the author went with that sort of tone here, which i think she does very well, plus overall it feels like a more original and fully realized story. (which, again, is just my opinion, but it's again frustrating how little wlw stories get attention compared to mlm ones, etc.) so she's kind of won me over with this one, i might pick up 'I kissed Shara Wheeler' at some point.

a few quibbles that kept it from being an all time fave : i do still find her writing a bit, hm, immature in places, not as evocative as it could be. things do get tied up almost a little too neatly, and the love interest's radical politics feel a bit more like an aesthetic gimmick but the book has a big subplot about saving a landmark diner from gentrification so i'll give that a pass. Regarding August, i am also kind of annoyed that every single shitty parents storyline ends up with 'but they tried their best and we're more alike than we know and we reconcile because family!:!!!' like it would be nice to have characters' happy ending be them enforcing their boundaries and wanting distance for once. but maybe that's not fluffy romance territory idk. Also, the cover is - if not awful, nice colors - too close to boring Canva corporate style, i hate this trend, this could have been so much cooler honestly !!! but none of those things are a big deal.

anyway !! i enjoyed it a lot and as a light, funny romantic beach read it was perfect. definitely goes on my list of fave sapphic romances.

[rachaelnpc]

Today I donated money to a family who lost their mother to suicide.

Two weeks ago I babysat for a friend who went to a funeral for a friend that was shot in an altercation.

I had said hi to Elijah McCain on campus before, we must have had the same lunch breaks and frequented the same Panera.

I trained Shanann Watts when she moved job duties to take ER Calls. A quick class on how to expect emergency patients and document information from EMS calls. I remember struggling to say her name because of how it was spelt.

I remember the many frantic emails at work following the James Holmes shooting. Report anything suspicious, how his notebook of plans was lost on our campus mail room, how part of the campus was on lock down because there might be a bomb. Co-workers frazzled because they had teen kids that were at the theater but thankfully seeing a different film.

The lock down at the small clinic across from the STEM school in Highlands Ranch where Kendrick Castillo, age 10, saved his classmates. It was during a go-live. We couldn't leave the building.

The 911 call I made twice for a homeless mad passed out in a parking lot. They never came. He woke up, gave him water and helped him into the shade.

The CPS call I made because the kids didn't feel safe alone with their father and their mother could only see the father's pain scewing her view. Nothing could be done. This was the 5th CPS call, multiple police calls for domestic abuse concerns, over seven DUIs, attempted murder ruled self defence, dropped charges for threating a cop...

The FBI call I made after witnessing a man who owned at least 3 AR-15s drunk, high on cocaine yell angerly at a news report of yet another mass shooting, 'That is the way to go out, leaving a statement. Fuck 'em all.' I also shared their violent history. Yet nothing was done and they continue to purchase firearms to this day.

I saw a father and mother slap thier infant child at an Old Chicago. I wanted to call. And say what? I don't know them or their names. The person I was with told me I think I'm high and mighty all the time. How I can do no wrong. Knowing if I said something I'll have my own night to deal with.

I get my dream job at 23. Well the job I've had my eye on since I was 19. The man I beat out for the job? In his 30s. He killed himself a week later. What if he got the job instead? Would he have met someone? Finally got that pep in their step? I took it only to be in my mid 30s, now floundering. Pissing away his lost opportunity that caused him his life.

At 19 I moved states against my parents' wishes, cut off. The boy that moved into my dorm room I just moved out of... hung himself in the closet.

I was almost killed at age 20 by having my head repeatedly smashed into the floor. I had slight bleeding and a headache. I only lossed consciousness for a few moments.

A family friend sent me a video of a women moaning while getting her butt tattooed. I stopped talking to them. I told my parents how uncomfortable it made me. They told me I was overreacting. He sent me the song, 'Just the two of us' He was like an uncle to me...

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON!

There is so much darkness all around me. I'm Drowning. I stay inside. I am careful who I let in. I long to let more in. I want to find a partner. I now find it a silly notion. It is all part of it, this 'American Dream'. What is the dream really? What is it costing others? The homeless, the ones stuck. I want to help lift them up. The ones way up there don't seem to notice. As I was heading up, I too got stuck. My platform wasn't broken. Someone was sabatoging it. I don't know anymore what I'm supposed to do. I don't want to be up there. I never really did.

I just want to be happy and respected.

I'm too sensitive, dramatic, reactive, playing the victim, negitive, copy, smile more, too opinionated... I'm too much!

I don't think I'm the problem. I am looking for solutions. I cannot ignore issues while pretending life is great. I'm going to put my energy into finding answers on how to make it better. The haters way isn't working. Let the haters hate. They say I do, I'm anti-American, brianwashed... hello?!?!? Step out of your gated illusion.

[meowmageddon]

December 2023 Reading Update!

Despite how busy November was, I finished a bunch of things (though there were two short novellas and a DNF in there, to be fair)! So there's a bunch of mini-reviews ahead, balanced by the fact that December is a quiet month for publishing, so I don't have anything big to highlight coming up.

So here's the Keep Reading break for the Long Post ahead!

November Mini-Reviews

The Forest Brims Over by Maru Ayase - 4 stars

Each of the chapters is told from a different perspective, circling inward to Rui herself at the end. There's a lot of examination over gender roles and iniquities, though it plays a little softball with the subject for my taste. I tend to prefer when women are allowed their full rage, and kinda feel some folks were let off the hook a little easy.

Lone Women by Victor LaValle - 5 stars

This was a wild ride; I understand why folks can't say too much about this one, because the journey takes many unexpected turns. What you can expect is for the chills to come from human sources at least as often as supernatural ones. I'm more interested than ever to pick up The Changeling from LaValle now, as I've heard it's incredible, too.

Fresh Dirt from the Grave by Giovanna Rivero - DNF

As much as I enjoyed the first couple stories, there were iffy things in the next two or three that put me off, particularly with portrayals of Indigenous folks and disability. Chose not to finish and to leave it unrated.

The Crane Husband by Kelly Barnhill - 4.5 stars

Heartbreaking. Hard to say much without revealing too much for this short novella. Just be warned it's a lot of parental neglect and abuse for the main character.

Feed Them Silence by Lee Mandelo - 3 stars

I could make a full post as long as this one about my thoughts on this little novella. I will say the main character's already a mess going in, and the time spent with the wolf is actually not a whole lot. I could see the points the book was making, but the execution wasn't quite there for some of them. The prose was good, and I'm still interested in their novel, Summer Sons, for now.

Current December Reads

Speaking Bones by Ken Liu

Almost halfway through! Just got through a battle that lasted 100 pages, due to interludes about the development of the technologies involved, and that's delightfully typical of this series. 😹

Loot by Tania James

Almost 1/3rd through. Pleasantly surprised by how much I'm enjoying this, so far. As a history nerd, I personally recommend looking up the situation in Mysore, India around the time of Tipu Sultan's reign for extra context and immersion.

Organ Meat by K-Ming Chang

Less than 50 pages in, but already noted down so many bits of prose I adore. This is absolutely not for everybody, both for sheer quantity of bodily fluids and functions mentioned, but also its shifting narrative style. So far chapters have been in first person POV, third person POV, and pure dialog written in a script-like format. Absolutely loving it.

Recent Acquisitions

The Lizard Prince and Other South American Stories

I forgot to mention I received my copy of this from Iron Circus Comics a couple months ago, after backing their crowdfunding for it last year! This completes their Cautionary Fables & Fairytales series, covering the stories of six continents!

Tomb Sweeping by Alexandra Chang

My pick from Book of the Month for December! It's an anthology of short fiction spanning the US and parts of Asia.

There's a lot to do this month for the holidays and preparations for the new year, so I'm not loading up my reading radar for now. If I finish Loot, I'll likely pick up my other giveaway win, Our Shadows Have Claws, so I can review it. If I finish Organ Meats, the next library read will depend on a few things, including how accessible my preferred branches are with holiday hours and inclement weather concerns 🙀

Until next time, look forward to my posts for my Favorite Reads of 2023 and Favorite New Music of 2023, which I'll migrate here in lieu of the traditional Twitter threads.

Thanks for reading, and happy holidays!

[diioonysus]

beautiful women of the past (imo) ii

[hatteymcstache]

Another callout post in the air.

I've been told about this post going around when someone was asking me if I was okay; so I've given into a lot of thought and I'm here explain. again. I will not display this person's name because I know the toxic part of my community will go ballistic and I hate that so much. Please don't.

The callout post in question:

Firstly, those who have tried went from being calm to immediately hostile when I tried to explain myself in dms. And the very rare few who reached out to me apologized for jumping to conclusions. You on the other hand, never tried reaching out to me once. If it's a confrontation in the discord server, then I'm not active in it and most likely forget. If it's a personal dm, I didn't get anything recent from you at all.

1. I did not defend C0nji. yes I do look at the whole anti/proshipping issue on both sides, doesn't mean I condone malicious creepy intent and doxxing/death threats. I'm just saying this artist is not a despicable person as far as I know, nor did they go out of their way of legitimately hurting others. With that being said, their whole idea of 'fiction doesn't affect reality' is very shallow-minded and gross considering how much it has put minors in danger, and they should learn to think about it but that's their choice, and problem. I'm not here to babysit.

2. The same claim I already debunked many times but will say again: I carelessly copy pasted old info and had no idea that word was still there but I removed the term 'Asperger's' and have stopped using it since, I was made aware of this years ago already. At the time I wasn't aware that in a deep negative history, and I've been around a few autistic mutuals who used that term as a scientific term.

3. Another of the same claim: Yes I do see Chihiro as a boy (or sometimes non-binary) cause as a trans man, it brings me comfort to see guys in a skirt with confidence. I'm not the most feminine guy but i'd like to have the freedom to explore without being misgendered. And if people do not like trans Sakura that's understandable, I just want to shed some light where trans woman can look buff, especially those who are as athletic as Sakura. The trans post you showed is meant to be a body positive for pre-op and post-op trans folk but you decided to flip it around and call it something else.

4. Me being genuinely upset of people making claims towards me doesn't automatically mean I've brushed off every transfem's concerns. Some of them who came forward to me, the conversations went from civil to being aggressive because they wouldn't listen or even consider my explanation that my intentions weren't malicious at all. Then the only trans woman who was civil came to me with fair criticism, told me I should be more specific with my content warnings when it comes to drawing pre-op bodies cause it would cause dysphoria for certain trans people, especially to trans women. That was where I listened and assured to be more cautious with how I portray my work.

5. The rest about me woobifying Taka and Gundham which I've addressed many times; characters dressing up in oversized sweaters or acting childlike/naïve doesn't automatically make them incapable or infant. That is never what I intend. And Gundham 'not knowing what sex is'- yes I know he's a breeder, human intercourse is a similar but different thing. He's asking Mondo in his own way because he has lacked connection with people for a long time; that's how I'm portraying, this also has been implied many times in his free time events and with how he talks to people. This is something where I relate to Gundham cause all I had was my art and imagination as a kid, so learning to interact with others is overwhelming.

I also don't understand that apparently Gundham needing people like Taka and Mondo (as dad-like figures) is so terrible- I'll say this now that yes I do portray Gundham as someone who is headstrong but he can feel very lonesome, he just doesn't how to express it. It's okay to need someone who truly accepts you or is that so wrong? Also it was never portrayed that Gundham or Taka need to reply on someone 24/7. so I really don't understand that argument you're trying to make. To me, It just sounds like autistic people shouldn't rely or need anyone at all cause it's offensive. If that's not what you mean I'm sorry, but that's what I'm perceiving cause all your statements are vague.

I not only do research but have talked to autistic mutuals/followers when developing my character Timmy; a lot of the valid criticism comes from how I should write his symptoms, showing both his mature and child-like sides etc, they even share their own experiences so I can illustrate them in a realistic and positive light. The way he's portrayed and capable of many things has made him relatable to a lot of people, which is something I'm trying to strive for; especially when some autistic people (who shared their experiences in my dms) behave like Timmy get ridiculed for ''''acting like 9 year olds'''' in my comment section which is something I never condone in my community I even made a comic post regarding that ableism.

No one is ever obligated to agree with the way I portray my stories and opinions; if someone doesn't like what I'm doing they are free to unfollow, block me and look for any other artist that does a better job in their art. My biggest issue with callout posts like this, is that people have different opinions of what makes a character a good or bad rep. It's very subjective and it depends on every person. Half of them including you do not like my representation, meanwhile the other half does enjoy my work, even find comfort in it. I'm not here to please every single person who didn't get everything they need from my work, I'm one man.

But the most painful part is not debunking these claims over and over; it's when my followers believe them right away without even asking me if they were true. It always leaves me unsurprised but disappointed. And yeah I'm not a good person, yes people tend to get scared of me that's fair, but I'm not as despicable as so many of these callout posts claim. I have talked to certain followers who have the decency to ask me what's going on; followers who actually listened to my explanation, and I listened to them back when they have questions. You don't even have to agree or like me after my explanation, just have the courtesy to ask before jumping to conclusions.

So yeah, the callout post is vague, and blown a lot of things I drew out of proportion and turned them into malicious intent which was never my approach. I was going to personally dm you about this but you have lost it the moment you made an 'awareness' post instead that does more damage than good. Feel free to keep your post up, feel free to think what you will. I just want to say all this to people who are genuinely confused. Whatever you plan to do, go ahead. I'm exhausted and have more in life to worry about. Unless followers genuinely want to ask questions to know more, this will be last time I confront the same. claims.

[thejustmaiden]

So out of nowhere I was tagged and quoted by a SR shipper for a blog of mine posted in August of last year. Talk about throwback but, hey, gotta appreciate that level of snooping. 😉

Back in the day I actually used to encourage discourse amongst Inuyasha fans- both shippers and antis alike- but I've since realized that it's a lost cause. But for you, @feministmetalgreymon , I'll grant this exception. Just 'cause it's been a while so why the hell not. haha

I want to assure you, however, that nothing you say will ever convince me that Sesshomaru and Rin are meant to be together romantically or that the story intended it so. Nor will you find any validation here. You can ship them for all I care, but please for all that is good and holy while I have your attention try- I mean really try- to understand why it is so many of us Inuyasha fans are so against this pairing in the first place (newsflash: it's not about ship wars), and why we believe a romance between the two of them is completely and utterly out of character.

For those of you interested in reading this, the blog of mine in question that the above shipper mentions in their counter-argument is here for reference. It's titled "Jaken = Rin's Dad?" I'm going to try and keep this short, but I'm also making no such promises. After all, I'm not exactly known for my brevity. haha Now let's get crackin'!

Like you, feministmetalgreymon, did for your recent blog here where you took screenshots of mine to address certain parts, I will be doing the same and dissecting yours accordingly.

[Snippet 1]

I worked with kids for many years as a teacher, and many people in my family have too or still do. Two of them happen to be just over 5 feet which is quite short for the average adult woman living here. I've also worked alongside many a women of short stature, and never did I hear any of them complaining of issues with their students having difficulty differentiating them from their own peers just because they were short as well. I'm sorry but that's just ridiculous. Kids are quite smart and pick up on a lot more than you seem to give them credit for. Height is not the only characteristic they look at to determine who's an adult and who's not, and it's foolish to suggest otherwise. So unless you're a babysitter who's still in their teens and/or who has very childlike features or behavior then I'm afraid what you're getting at is total hogwash. This is just another example of how you shippers offer nothing of real substance to your reasoning, it's only ever cherry-picking or strawmanning from you guys. Stop deflecting from the real issues please, because this certainly isn't one and only winds up being a complete waste of time for all parties involved.

[Snippet 2]

Okay, calm down now. I wasn't insinuating that relationships between parents and children can't change over time in terms of how they get along. Of course that's possible, as all families experience their fair share of estrangement and abuse. What I was speaking about was in reference to the overall dynamic between the two. Because a bad mother or father can still be viewed as a parental figure to their child even if say they're not in said child's life anymore. Since Sesshomaru and Rin share a healthy bond- and just a friendly reminder that in my blog I even said that he doesn't have to necessarily be labeled her father but that a romantic relationship later would still be inappropriate- I didn't deem it necessary to address what you brought up. Plus, it kinda, umm, misses the point?? Please, let's stay on topic. And it's not captured in the screenshot, but stop acting like there isn't a small part of them that idolizes their parents at some point during childhood. Just like you mention later on how it's normal for kids to have innocent crushes on adults that they eventually grow out of? Well, guess what, the same concept applies here. Kids eventually learn that their parents are far from perfect and make mistakes too. Rin is so damn young in the OG series though that we never even get to see her reach that maturity level.

[Snippet 3]

LOL! Alright, okay, so the "unbreakable bond" bit you're mentioning was actually me quoting you sessrinners. Did you not catch that? I literally spelled it out. *sigh* The whole point I was making is that shippers like yourself make hypocritical and contradictory statements all.the.goddamn.time. One moment you guys claim that Sesshomaru and Rin were essentially strangers and meant very little to each other, only to say in the same breath a few seconds later that they were destined to be together and their bond is like no other. I agree, their bond is special, but why must that mean they're going to fall in love?

That is the root of the matter here. Too many animes/mangas have romanticized this older adult man & young girl growing up falling in love trope that it's become way too normalized and widely accepted across the world- and yes, in some cultures more than others. Sadly, you lack the awareness to recognize how this all works. You know how we know that? When we see that you shippers are so desensitized to sexualized images of girls in the media that you share posts like this one below which *subtly* imply a future romance although one half of that pairing is still just a child in the pic and then try and pass it off as cute. That's like super fucking problematic and it scares me that you can't see that (or deny you do). 🤢

After all that's said and done, Sesshomaru leaving Rin in the village with Kaede is to me the strongest indicator more than pretty much anything else he's done for Rin that proves he is her adoptive father. It's so funny to me how you somehow see the exact opposite though. 🤔 What I think is happening is that you got yourself on some squeaky clean ass shipper goggles fresh out of your little echo chamber. Because I hate to tell you, but what you're fantasizing is what you want to see and not what's actually there on screen or was written into the story. I'm strictly talking about Inuyasha and the manga of course. [For the TL; DR version skip to the last paragraph.]

Parents looking after their kids is what parents are supposed to do. A good parent will do anything to keep their child safe and ensure they are cared for, so what he did for her by leaving her there was in her best interests clearly. Besides, as a babysitter, you more than most people should understand that parents aren't always able to be there for their kids so sometimes others gotta step in to help. Haven't you heard of the saying, "it takes a village to raise a child?" Which in Rin's case is literally true! 😂 Sometimes kids are even sent off to stay with grandparents and that's who raises them instead. Or maybe they have to temporarily live with an aunt or uncle because their single parent's job requires they work out of town 4-5 days of the week so they're hardly home. But that doesn't mean that the parents care or love their kids any less, and it's foolish to assume that Sesshomaru must have thought very little of Rin simply due to the fact that he made the decision to leave her in the village. Come on, y'all are acting like he abandoned her there!!

It's just given the circumstances Sesshomaru finally came to learn that Rin traveling with him was no longer safe. I also like to think it's because he wished for her to live a more normal life and to learn how to fully trust humans again. Plus, continuing to travel with him as young as she was would have proven dangerous and unwise. Now for you to know all this and still manage to turn his past actions towards her while she was just a child into a romantic gesture is what boggles my mind. Regardless of how you look at it, from my perspective or your own, Sesshomaru is in the wrong. Either he's a father figure who impregnates his daughter at the young age of approximately 14. OR he's this man she used to travel with who maybe isn't a father to her but who nonetheless basically rapes her since kids her age can't consent to sex with an adult. Idk about you but it sounds to me like nobody here wins with either scenario we're given. In other words, you should be just as mad as we are. If only one side didn't choose to forsake their morals they know we both have in common for the sake of a ship. Welp. 🤷‍♀️

I agree, incest is disgusting but that's not the only problem we have with this pairing. A romantic bond forming between Sesshomaru and Rin would also constitute as grooming.

You realize that over the years he visited her in the village that he brought her gifts too and essentially watched her grow up right before his very eyes, right? I mean, I know you do, but I really shouldn't have to explain further why pursuing a romantic/sexual relationship with each other is plain and simple wrong. And before you say it's not because he didn't have any malintent, please understand that considering their history and power dynamic up to then that yes this is still considered grooming even if Rin supposedly "wanted it" or "made the first move." Whether you consider him her father or not, as the adult who took on a role resembling that of a caretaker in her early life- a critical developmental time for a child- Sesshomaru is obligated to turn down any advances by Rin and most definitely should not initiate any himself. As the first close adult figure she's had in her life since her parents died, it's unfathomable to imagine how Sesshomaru could go through with taking advantage of this young girl who was under his care and supervision since they met. To think he could be capable of betraying that trust sickens me to the core.

This. Now THIS is how a parent/guardian or a similar adult caretaker (babysitter, teacher, etc.) talks to a child. And, in turn, this is how some young children talk to adults. You'd be insane and delusional to deny it! We see it in our everyday lives, do we not? From where else do you think our stories draw most of their inspiration? Yes, obviously these fictional universes have aspects of fantasy that don't exist in the real world, but so how then do you suppose we're able to relate to them? The reason for that being is because these stories are written by people for people, so naturally there are going to be real life aspects embedded throughout. Sure, a little escapism doesn't hurt as we don't need to take everything so seriously, but ultimately we all need to recognize that the messages in the stories we tell matter. Most stories possess a combination of both light and dark themes, but when it specifically comes to the latter we gotta be careful with how we tackle this in children's media since kids are far more impressionable.

So if at the center of a story we have two of the main protagonists whose mom is basically their same age and to top it off she knew their dad when she was just a girl and who just so happened to help raise her, wouldn't you say that's beyond fucked up or at the very least so fucking weird? Like why would we think it's even remotely okay for our children to watch this garbage?? Really think about it. Try and be objective for once and think about how it would sound explaining this storyline to an outsider who's never watched IY or HNY. Well, antis have tried this before many times and we always get the same reaction: Ewww!

Like I said earlier, if you wanna ship it then fine, but 1) please stop seeking our approval or trying to change our minds - your ship wish came true didn't it, so why do you need us to validate it? 2) even though it's not canon, respect that we don't support this sequel portraying pedophilia in a positive light. It's harmful af to not only allow but glorify the continuation of sexualized images of young girls everywhere. And I shouldn't have to say this, but just because this trope is popular as you say does not make it right. Lolicon themes in the media have been an issue forever and it needs to stop. Yes, even some people in Japan or "the East" would agree. Shocker!

We're pissed off and rightfully so because Yashahime's TV rating is 14, not to mention it airs at the prime time kids in Japan watch TV after getting home from school. That's Towa and Setsuna's age, true, but if Rin being the mom when she's like only a year older than them (please don't argue w/ me about the math- antis have so far been right every time with it) is straight-up disgusting and not something we should be supporting or endorsing. Rin's a whole ass child!! Please don't start with the "but times were different then so her having kids at 15 is acceptable" argument either, because we've already debunked that and every other single excuse you guys throw at us. Besides, how or why would you expect young viewers to know these historical "facts" anyway, especially if as you suggest fiction doesn't affect reality so what does it matter? Yet here we are, arguing over a fictional show in real life almost a year and a half into the "Sesshomaru fucks?" sequel being announced. My ass, your ass, hell all our asses fiction doesn't affect reality!

Look, I do apologize if the tone of this blog came off as snippy or condescending at times. I do not wish you any ill will, it's just I'm not really sure what you expected to get out of all this besides maybe getting on my nerves perhaps. haha A lot of you shippers have been desperately scrambling to interact with us, lurking in our tags, jumping onto our posts screaming canon and getting so defensive even though you sought us out first. We've been sticking to our tags, so how about you stay in your lane too. By the way since we're on the topic, have you seen Twitter or Reddit?! SR shippers there are the actual worst and many Inuyasha fans (not just antis) have complained of not feeling welcomed to engage in fandom spaces anymore. Shippers swarm them and scare them off simply because fans don't like your ship and refuse to accept it. It's pathetic, really. No one should ever be bullied or harassed just because they don't like something you might. We're all fans of Inuyasha, aren't we? So let's act like it. Yashahime on the other hand, you guys are welcome to that pungent heap of trash. Fans have a right to criticize it too, but if you like it then good for you, so keep on liking it and don't mind us.

I'm almost done, but real quick back to Jaken! Let's not forget about how the official Yashahime website- which came out after my blog, mind you- described Jaken. This translation isn't the best one available but it's the only version a fellow anti friend could track down. They do recall a better one done by a native Japanese speaker who was also an anti, and that member confirmed that Jaken is indeed called Rin's babysitter. So you see, I was right in my interpretation. In the original post I did compare Jaken to a brother, but after talking to others (some comments can be found under said post) I did acknowledge that he's more of a reluctant babysitter who's not related. And if he's not at least a brother to Rin, then he's definitely not her father.

At the end of the day, the creator Rumiko Takahashi has the final word. Which is guess what? Hogosha. 💖 Probably should've just started out with that and saved us all the trouble, huh? Good day/night to you.

Papamaru bids you adieu now. 🤞

[n1kolaiz]

"You want to know what death is? I'll tell you. Death is the loss of life. Despite everything doctors like me attempt... a patient's life can still fall through our fingers. You think death lies in the apex of science? Anyone with such little regard for life will die by my hand."

Character Analysis: Yosano Akiko

Age: 25 || Ability: Thou Shalt Not Die

BSD CHAPTER CHAPTER 65-66 SPOILERS

table of contents:

1. Author counterpart.

2. Yosano's history.

3. 'Angel of Death' defined.

4. Yosano and Atsushi.

YOSANO BRAINROT!*(#&!*@#($

1. Author counterpart.

Having been given the “Sho Ho” at birth, Yosano Akiko’s counterpart—the real-life author—was known for her zealous take on both feminism and pacifism.

Side note: Once again, to avoid confusion, I will use the name Sho Ho in reference to the real-life author, and Yosano in reference to the BSD character.

Sho Ho's writings were pretty much out-of-the-ordinary in her time, and despite being suppressed by the social norms of gender hierarchy, she sought to reform society’s view on the cultural perspectives of women and their sexuality (She expressed her love for a woman in one of her poems, but many still argued on whether she identified herself as queer or not.)

"Thou Shalt Not Die," Yosano's ability, is actually named after one of Sho Ho's most famous, controversial poems. She wrote it for her brother, who was a soldier in the war between Russia and Japan (1904-1905). In her poem, she expressed her general distaste for war and how her brother was a part of it.

O my young brother, I cry for you Don't you understand you must not die! You who were born the last of all Command a special store of parents' love

Would parents place a blade in children's hands

Teaching them to murder other men Teaching them to kill and then to die? Have you so learned and grown to twenty-four?

- excerpt from Sho Ho's poem, "Kimi Shinitamou Koto Nakare"

Her words were blunt enough to inflict guilt on her brother's conscience, as she wasn't afraid to express her disapproval over how her brother took part in the typical violent bloodshed and manslaughter of war. Such opinions perturbed the authorities, and her work was eventually banned from the public for a period of time. Later on, it was used as an anti-war statement.

2. Yosano's history.

Now, as for the character in BSD, Yosano is seen to be generally strong-willed, and later on, we see that she is terrifyingly compassionately ambitious in the way she treats her patients. She treasured life itself, and hated the thought of losing a patient.

Yosano had developed her relations with Mori Ougai back in the Great War, when she was just 11 years old. Her ability was a great benefactor in saving lives. Realistically speaking, she was used for her ability to heal injured soldiers and diminish the effect of any casualty acquired.

Initially, she wasn't aware of this, until one of her close friends pointed it out by subtly accusing Mori of manipulating her to participate in the War under the close-to false pretence of 'saving lives.'

As much as her ability did save lives, it also forced soldiers to return to the frontlines and suffer injuries over and over again. The soldiers were never given the opportunity to return to their families because of her ability. This obliged them to carry on in the war without any excuse, inserting them into a vicious cycle they had no escape out of.

Metaphorically speaking, Yosano's hatred for Mori sort of mirrors Sho Ho's disdain for war and fighting, don't you think? The way Kafka materialised Yosano's past was quite interesting because he used chapters 65 and 66 to explain Yosano's dislike for Mori, reflecting how Sho Ho used her poem to explain why she condemned the idea of war and how her brother was part of it.

Before the effect of her ability was fully understood, however, every soldier praised and thanked her for what an angel she was. One of the soldiers she had befriended and gotten close to even kept a tally of the number of times she had saved him. He was the one who gifted her the butterfly hairpin she wore all the time.

The weight of the truth that her ability was a curse rather than a blessing fully dawned on her when her soldier friend ultimately committed suicide, because the fact of being indefinitely trapped in the throes of war agonised him until his spirit gave out. This drove Yosano to loathe her ability, or rather, how it was used.

In the time she participated in the War, Yosano was given the alias 'angel of death' due to the control she retained over the battlefield, but I thought that perhaps Kafka had a reason behind giving her this title, so I did my research.

3. 'Angel of Death' defined.

Side note: I wouldn't want to disrespect any culture or religion, so if my citations are inaccurate and/or disrespectful, do feel free to correct me/let me know! I did research out of pure curiosity, and I don't intend to twist the significance of any of the interpretations.

I had to grow up learning about the basics of religious stuff, so it's kind of nice to study something out of the box, and very much against my father's rigid belief system :D

ARCHANGEL ARIEL

(archangel: an angel of higher rank)

I came across the few characteristics of angels/goddesses and their roles, and the one which really caught my attention was the female archangel, Ariel, the angel of nature.

[ source ]

In Hebrew, the name Ariel means 'altar' or 'lioness of God,' and her role is to heal. In addition to that, she is also recognised as a helper to another one of the seven main archangels, Raphael, whose role is to provide physical and emotional healing, too.

She is the protecter of the environment and the animals therein, and is bestowed with the duty to oversee the order of heavenly bodies as well as earth's natural resources. She assures the sustenance of food, water, shelter, and supplies of human beings, much like how a nurse is to a patient I suppose.

In relation to Yosano, I think this part is pretty self-explanatory, or perhaps this is blown out of proportion HA, so take this as a suggestion rather than a fact, because I'd like to believe that Kafka had a reason for giving Yosano a title as such.

In the past, I've come across the angel of death only to perceive it as a female grim reaper of some sort, so it was pretty cool to find that the word 'angel' and 'death' made up a title of a someone like Ariel, one of the purest forms of humility and compassion.

GREEK GODDESS PANAKEIA

For my beloved (wannabe/or not) students of Greek mythology (much like myself, let's make a cult!), you've probably heard of Panakeia, the goddess of healing. Medicine finds most of its vital significance in Greek history, and in its mythology, Panakeia is actually known for her ability to heal any kind of sickness.

[ source ]

Her name means 'panacea,' which is actually defined as a remedy for all diseases. Terminal diseases and injuries lead to death, right? This would bring us back to Yosano's ability to nullify any injury's effects on a person, keeping them from death itself.

Now, we know that in order for Yosano's ability to work, her patient, or victim, has to be in a near-death condition in order for her treatment to take effect. This can't exactly fit into the description of resurrection, but it can be described as some sort of rebirth.

GREEK GODDESS PERSEPHONE

So another goddess which reminds me of Sho Ho/Yosano, is Persephone, the goddess of spring and rebirth. Before Hades, the god of the underworld, fell in love with Persephone to take her to live with him, Persephone lived a happy life.

Hades, with his nature of darkness and the like, was captivated by how pure Persephone was, and stole her away from her former life to live in an environment which differed sharply from her natural aura of purity.

[ source ]

Remember when Yosano's friend left a note behind before he killed himself? The note said nothing except for, "You are too righteous." Take that as you will, but figuratively speaking, you could say Mori takes the role of Hades in the story, while Yosano can be portrayed as Persephone.

Sho Ho can also be a parallel of Persephone, in that she had to adapt to the realities of war and disharmony, while Persephone had to adapt to the raw darkness of the underworld with Hades.

Sho Ho stood against society's norms and decided to reform it, making her one of the most well-known feministic pacifist in history, while Persephone managed to escape from the underworld to return to her former position, earning the title the 'Bringer of Life,' or the 'Destroyer of Death.'

Furthermore, the way Sho Ho's anti-war poem took its effect later on, reflects the way Persephone restored balance in the world after returning from the underworld.

4. Yosano and Atsushi.

chapter 66; Yosano: "It's my fault that those close to me died... Is there some place where it's okay for me to live?"

chapter 8; Atsushi: "If I have any chance of saving them all, of returning them home safely, would that mean it's okay for me to keep on living?"

I couldn't help but think of Dazai and Atsushi back when I was reading through these panels. Ranpo (my beloved), along with Fukuzawa, accepted Yosano as she was, despite how her ability was a cause of despair and misfortune.

Ranpo looked past her mistakes and the entirety of how dark her past was to welcome her into the Armed Detective Agency. Dazai, on the other hand, knew who Atsushi was and what his ability had made him do before anyone else, and still decided to provide a safe place for Atsushi to find his sense of belonging, journeying with him as he learned to use his ability properly.

For more info about Dazai and Atsushi's dynamic, you can check out the analysis I did for Dazai :D

Atsushi desired to save people to prove his right to live, while Yosano made her wish to achieve the recovery of all her patients the reason for her existence.

Others would prefer to accuse both Yosano and Atsushi of having a saviour complex, but the reason why they pursued to save people with utmost dedication, stems from the nature of what their past was like. You know the saying 'from broken to beautiful?' Yeah, it's something like that.

The way their pasts were written out gave them a desire to change, which was, I daresay, initiated by the people who took them in: Ranpo and Dazai. Their abilities were demonised because of how they were used, but once they broke from their abilities' effect over their lives, they honed their skills to control them for the right cause instead.

In a less cynical point of view, I believe both Yosano and Atsushi stood for what was right, and wanted nothing but to achieve peace and harmony in whatever way they could, even if it meant risking their own lives to save others.

So yeah, that's it for my rants today. Thank you for reading, and if you have anything to add, go ahead! I'm open to discussions ;)

[whosscruffylooking]

The Purest Things- Repeating History

Aaron Hotchner x Female Reader

Word Count: 2k

Warnings: Brief mentions of murder and alcohol. Canon typical violence.

A/N: this takes place during season 3 episode 11, birthright. i had a lot of fun studying this episode and making it my own. i have changed certain dialogue and who says what for the sake of the story. please enjoy!

The Purest Things Masterlist

(my gif! please credit if you use.)

january 2008

Syd Moore said, “Disregard for the past will never do us any good. Without it we cannot know truly who we are.”

+++++

Your alarm is often hushed before it even has an opportunity to set off nowadays because you usually wake up before it even has the chance.

4:25 A.M.

You groan and toss your pillow over your face. Maybe, just maybe, you can will yourself to sleep for a little longer. As if someone heard your pleas for slumber, your phone starts buzzing on your bedside table. Of course, it is unnecessary for you even to read the messages. There is a case.

+++++

"Last night in Fredericksburg, a 20-year-old woman, Molly McCarthy, was abducted," J.J. begins, "She's the third to go missing in the last 6 weeks. All disappeared from public places. No one's seen them since until now. A couple days ago, body parts with cigarette burns were recovered from a national park that was once the site of the battle of Chancellorsville."

"Were they able to make an I.D.?" you and Hotch ask simultaneously. Your eyes meet, but he breaks the contact abruptly. Flustered and insecure, you bury your focus deep into the file in front of you. The group discusses the case for a couple of minutes, but you are so concentrated on the papers that you hardly absorb any information they've shared.

There is something familiar about this case to you. Suddenly, realization strikes.

Rejoining the discussions, you say, "I remember reading about a case like this in Spotsylvania county. Similar markings on the bone. It was the winter of 1980, also in Fredericksburg. There were 5 women aged 16 to 24. They were buried in pieces."

"Same markings. Same civil war battlefield," J.J. responds in agreement.

The team agrees that this could be the works of the same killer. There are aspects of the more recent killings that would be impossible to copycat since those details had never been released to the public. But, if this is the same unsub, what's he been doing for the past 27 years?

+++++

Hotch focuses on the road while you watch out the window of the passenger seat. Occasionally, you sneak the odd peek at him. His stoicism is alluring, and you find yourself drawn to this demeanor like a moth to a flame. Piecing together the tiny glimpses you've collected thus far as if working on a mental puzzle, you scrutinize his attributes. His eyes bare the beginnings of crow's feet. Only his sideburns tease the speckling of salt and pepper undertones. His lips turn downwards at the corners, no doubt from years of scowling at unsubs.

Reid speaks up from behind you both and breaks your train of thought. Probably for the better, there's no reason why you should examine your unit chief so intently.

"It's funny--he always dumps the bodies in this battlefield, no matter what the risk."

"It's a respected landmark. He's flaunting," Aaron reckons.

"It makes him feel important," you say in agreement.  

Once you have arrived at the crime scene, you follow Agent Hotchner closely. Reid trails ahead, most likely trying to keep up with his own train of thought.

"How does someone not see or hear them?" You ask the sheriff.

He turns to you with a defeated expression, "It was dark. He had the advantage. Molly's boyfriend was the last person to see her. He said she was alone for a minute, maybe less."

Hotch surveys the surroundings, "He's patient and works fast."

"He's perfected his M.O.," Reid states while looking around.

You cross your arms as a wave of unease gets the best of you as you envision the moments leading to Molly's attack.

"If our unsub's pushing 60, he's gotta be strong enough to carry her a long way without her struggling," you bring out.

Hotch looks to you with a concerned squint. You shake your head, signaling to him that it's nothing you can't get under control. He nods in response. The sheriff agrees to point out the various entrances to the park.

"I'll catch up with you," your Unit Chief states. He motions for you to step aside with him, and you comply.

"You know, ever since my wife and I had our son, I dread receiving cases involving children," he discloses to you.

Tears well up in your eyes, "I can't even imagine, but sir, why are you telling me this?"

"This job will inevitably strike close to home on some cases more than others. It's okay for you to feel overwhelmed by it all every once and a while," he assures you.

"You never lose it, though."

He sighs heavily, "Maybe I should have."

Shortly before you joined the BAU, Hotch's wife Haley left with their son Jack. You never ask questions or stick your nose where it doesn't belong. It isn't your place, and you can't blame him for not wanting to bring his family struggles to work. He deals with enough broken families on the job as it is. Mixing his own personal life into the field would only make it more challenging to prioritize. Despite all this, you cannot help but wonder what exactly led to his and his wife's separation. You hope that they can find their way back to each other. The crimes you investigate do not need to claim the Hotchner's as victims as well.

+++++

"I'll let you talk to Chrissy Wilkenson," Hotch directs you towards the kitchen. You wipe your sweaty palms against the fabric of your pants and make your way into the kitchen, Hotch following closely behind you.

"Mrs. Wilkenson," you say gently, "My name is Y/F/N. I have just a few questions about your husband. Where does Charlie usually go when he's stressed?"

"The barn," she stutters. You can tell she's anxious and afraid for the well-being of her family.

"Anywhere else, Chrissy?"

Hotch is called into the other room, and you continue questioning Chrissy. She's becoming overwhelmed, so you guide her to the dining room.

"I know this is difficult, Chrissy."

"Did the father of my child really do that to those poor women?" She cradles her baby bump.

Your heart breaks for her, and you choose to remain silent. Sometimes saying nothing speaks louder than words.

Footsteps bound throughout the house, and Hotch appears in the doorway, "The sheriff will stay here with Mrs. Wilkenson. We need you with us."

Standing up from your chair, you place your hand atop Chrissy's, "History doesn't have to repeat itself." It is almost as if she could tell you were reading her thoughts. The endless whispers that cloud her mind making her feel like she's left with only one choice, but there's always another option. That is all you are trying to remind her of.

+++++

As you and your team trek through the forest, you see a clearing.

"Hotch, this way," you beckon him to pursue your course.

Suddenly, a gunshot rings out, and you stop in your tracks. You make eye contact with Hotch and mirror each other's actions, dashing towards the opening in the trees. Your heart pounds in rhythm with your footsteps colliding against the ground. It is clear to you from your exchange with Chrissy at the house that the origin of the gunshot will shock everyone but yourself. As you reach the clearing and rush down the hill, your speculation is validated.

Chrissy Wilkenson is standing over the body of her husband, the unsub. A traumatized young man haunted by his father's past and plagued by the idea that children are trapped in the endless cycles created by their parents.

I guess the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. Jesus. Now is not the time for that.

The newly widowed woman claims self-defense, yet the cops handcuff her anyways. Inside, you feel conflicted while watching her get into the back of the squad car.

Hotch appears by your side but remains silent. Again, sometimes silence speaks louder than words. You bit your lip, attempting to hide the fact that it is trembling.

"What did you say to her as you were leaving the dining room?"

"I told her that history does not have to repeat itself. I wanted her to know that even when it feels like you are backed into a corner, there is always another way out. Sometimes people don't know where to look for their out thought," you quiver.

He lightly touches your arm and gives you a reassuring tilt of the head, "Just know that you did everything you could. We will never do this job perfectly. Doing the right thing usually costs more than it pays. You did your part.  I'm not a saint, and I am far from a hero, but I have integrity and honor, and I do this job to the best of my ability."

"If you can leave a case with a clear conscience," he continues, "you know you did the best you could. Any other thought process will eat away at you slowly but surely, and ultimately, it will result in the demise of your career and destruction of yourself."

+++++

After a seemingly neverending day, you all arrive back at Quantico.

"I could really go for a drink, guys. What do you say? Newbie's buying," you wave your wallet around frivolously.

"I could go for 5 drinks!" Prentiss exclaims.

"Count me in," Morgan winks at you. He never fails to make you blush.

Reid hesitates and you pout your bottom lip, "Please Reid! How could you not want a repeat of Dolly Parton night last month?"

Hotch comes down the stairs, "Dolly Parton night? Do I want to know?"

You and Derek snicker to each other as Spencer attempts to diffuse his own embarassment.

"9 to 5 is an iconic female anthem that certainly has a rather bewitching affect on a man when mixed with alcohol."

"You only drank Diet Coke that night," you roll your eyes at him.

Out of the corner of your eye, you notice Hotch forcing his way through the small group formed around the desks.

Making your way over to him, you invite him to join, "Want a beer?" You second guess yourself, but it seems as though his rather stern expression softens ever so slightly when he pivots on his heels to look at you.

"I would like that," he answers softly.

He immediately returns to his original path and hovers near the glass doors. You casually make your way over to him, joined by Dave and Emily. A man barges in through the glass doors announcing Aaron's name.

"Agent Hotchner?"

"Yes," the subject in question breaths out almost defeatedly.  

The yellow package he holds in his hands is all too familiar and instantly churns your stomach into knots. You gnaw at your bottom lip, drawing a metallic taste that causes you to cringe.

"What is it?" Emily speaks up.

There's no question as to what it is. Oh Hotch. I’m so sorry.

Hotch's eyes trace the package from corner to corner in disbelief, "Haley's filing for divorce. I've been served."

When he eventually takes his eyes off of the lettering, his eyes meet yours. They lock onto you and it is in that moment that you feel as though you have been given the key to unlock his soul. His eyes are so unusual at this moment; they are more vulnerable than you have ever seen. The stoic man is gone, and instead, it is the eyes of one who is in tremendous pain. You had mistaken his bloodshot eyes for physical fatigue on the plane, but now you see that it is emotional exhaustion as well.

If only you knew how badly I want to hug you and tell you that you won't be swallowed up by this darkness. There's a long road ahead, but you have so many people here who love you and are here to support you through this. You aren't alone. Trust me, I know.

In some way, you pray that he can read into your soul and see the pain you feel for him. Once more, your shared silence proves to speak for itself.  

At last, he breaks eye contact with you and finally releases the breath that you had been holding in. Dave grabs onto your arm, seeing the clear impact Hotch's news has on you, no doubt having also noticed Hotch's immediate response in looking at you.

"I'm sorry, but I don't think I can join you tonight," he excuses himself and escapes to the seclusion of his office.

Maybe history does have a way of repeating itself.

Tag List:

@chellybear98​ @destiny-tsukino​ @wanniiieeee​ @sweetiecake180 @vampiracontessa​ @weexinling​ @spaghetti-dad187 @hothskies​ @star-stuff-in-the-cosmos​ @mac99martin​ @clairedragonessbaker @cecemariee7302​ @halloweenwithreid @megans-txmblr​ @theoldestguard @purpledragonturtles​ @chazubagi​ @frogrrylovebot @agentaaronhotass​ @obsssedwithjustaboutanything @mcntsee @ssagube @softhetixx @kenzies-mr-j @peachyotps @cat11-2 @prettylittlemoonlight @ravenmoore14 @gubs-boobs @spencerreidsoulmate @joyclubie

[sunlightnmoonshine]

In the end (pt. 1)

It feels a little surreal that the show is over and I will no longer have anything to look forward to because the devil judge set such a high bar in terms of writing and character exploration that I will always hold dear to my heart. Given that its actually done, I found myself drowning in the realisation that we will never see these characters again and how I feel about where the show left them off. So this is me coming to terms with it:

1. Min Jung Ho - Snake lol. Something I admired about the writing was how they didn't try to make him all out some evil piece of shit but rather someone that had a very strong misguided belief off some strange frustrations against Yohan who was changing the legal system more radically but effectively. Which he could not come to terms with. In the end he villanised Yohan and ignored the actual problems that persisted and inevitably contributed to the problem all in a sense of self righteousness, ah sorry, hypocrisy is the better word. The show leaves him looking oh so pathetic, he can't even raise his head to meet Gaon, the boy he betrayed severely and he'll rot for the rest of his life going down in history as a hypocrite who did nothing to actually fix the system he claimed he would be the arm of justice for. Its a fitting end.

2. Heo Joong Se: Clown. The show really said he's a spoilt, stubborn arrogant joke until the end. Down to the way he insulted everyone but specifically insulted women. The way all he did in that court room was scream his head off without an ounce of remorse somehow still deluded by the fact that he's doing this for the country? But knowing fully well he's a businessman through and through and that was all he will be. I can not stress how phenomenal it is that it is Jung Sun Ah that shoots him dead. Its clear he's had it coming from her hand ever since she tried to suffocate him during the massage but it's just how randomly she does it. She's sick of him, she's aware she's going to be targeted, she's aware he's done too much behind her back and never once respected her and its in the midst of one of his screaming fits particularly screaming "I am the King" that the bullet goes through and there's silence. Perfection.

3. The rest of the clowns of the SRF : idle bystanders that turned an eye away from inherent evil and repeatedly benefitted off of their actions without an ounce of remorse yet again. But hilarious nevertheless because they really became jesters on that stage in a desperate fit to live, threw themselves away to get out a door. It's noteworthy that they spent most of their time trying to stop the other from leaving instead of quietly watching and just getting out. None of them of are capable of that, they only know to take from others. Crumbling under the systematic stage they built? Poignant. I don't really care what anyone says they deserved to die point in tow with HJS who saw human life as so unworthy of it wasn't their own. There's a reason why human trafficking is considered one of the worst of crimes, human experimentation falls closely next to it. All because they were poorer than them. Guess their greed really out did them. Tried to put on a show in a court house which was anyway all just a staged facade and ultimately they died on that stage with their masks out for everyone to see. For their people to see them throw each other away to live. If they were going to throw each other away - their own kind- what wouldn't they do to the lower class? Oof the show gave them what they deserved- humiliation.

4. Jung Sunah - I still struggle to come to terms with how she's gone and how painful everything about her was until the last minute. It's clear Sunah has been breaking for a few episodes now. She's so close to the top and she's realised how truly alone she is and she's realised Yohan will never want her the way she wants him to. She's realised every person she used to get to where she was, ended up being wasted stepping stones because she doesn't have what she wants all the way at the top and never will. The way the show has her quietly go to the experimentation centre and weep over the girl she saw herself in but someone she initially turned away from because she's not part of her bigger plan. The child she left to fall prey to the people Sunah has inevitably helped secure positions in her attempt to secure her own position. The way the show focuses on how the child has been repeatedly pierced with needles something Sunah hates the most and how she realises this is also her fault. She probably thought hey I'll get to the top and do things my way but as Yohan pointed out, ruling over trash isn't it, it'll never be worth it and she's essentially walking with a target on her back and she'll never be free because the weight of her sins will catch up to her and the rich will always be after her because she's not the same as them. She would be living on the edge forever. And she knows this.

Something I found very interesting was how she wasnt roped in on the crimes of the Dream House Project. Yohan only highlighted her crime as having killed K and Soohyun and its the frustration she feels in that moment that really gets me. It's also why I think she could never get out of the show because she killed innocent people which is highlighted repeatedly and at the time never showed remorse for it. BUT I love how the show somehow saves her from humiliation, until the end they paint her with regality and power because that is who Sunah is. Frankly she could have walked right out of the door while they were throwing a fit and Yohan would have let her because that was the terms of the game but he'd have come after her at some point and even if he didn't Gaon most certainly would have.

But it's the way the show brought it all back to how she feels about Yohan since he's the other half of what she's always wanted, the way she's happy he's alive, how she goes and stands in front of him and she's got her hand on the trigger of the gun while Yohan on the button of detonator. I believe, if Sunah had shot him Yohan would have detonated the bomb and died with them and I also believe deep down Sunah knew Yohan would somehow get out of this even if she didn't shoot him, so she really gave him the chance to get out and back to Elijah. I am not sure if Sunah couldn't shoot Yohan or if she didn't want to, and I lean towards the latter because she really liked him, it might have been ill placed desire but if things were different if she hadn't sided with the SRF in hopes of getting to the top she and Yohan might have worked things out and they would both be healing. If she only hadn't killed the innocent people to make a point... But at the end of it Sunah took her fate into her hands and I appreciate that the show gave her the agency over it, to decide not to shoot Yohan because she's finally letting go ( I stand by this but if Yohan had died Sunah would have lost - she never wanted him to die), because she won't do what the rest of the SRF scum want of her and because she's fine with going on her own terms.

That doesn't mean it didn't hurt though... I cry thinking about it because the show tried really hard to show how unfair everything was to Sunah and how if circumstances had been different, if the world had cared a bit more how she might have turned out differently. Her final moments the flashback to the one act of kindness she had needed in her life, the way Yohan really must have sparkled in her eyes, and how much she valued that moment all the way to her death because no matter what, in his own loneliness and difficulty he was kind to her. Jeez it hurts.

Ideally I'd have wanted her to live but I don't know how that would have worked out. At the end of it not all villains are evil. Some are products of the ills of the system that left them alone and let them become monsters but behind a monster there can also be a victim.

[author-morgan]

Okay, I haven't watched Vikings... but please, tell me about Harald Finehair? :3 ❤️

Oh, Harald. Harald, my love. I'll try to keep this short because I could go on for ages about him (and Halfdan) and Vikings in general. Spoilers ahead for Vikings.

So, Harald Finehair rolls up early in season 4 ready to help raid Paris looking like a full meal (see gif below —look at that smirk, he knows he's hot shit). He's outspoken, he's charming, he's a leader, he's got a lot of charisma, he's ambitious. And he has BIG ambitions. Harald wants to make himself King of all Norway, why you may ask? For love (in my humble opinion, he's kind of a hopeless romantic who wears his heart on his sleeve and that makes it really easy for women to make a fool of him). When he was younger, Harald fell in love with a princess, Ellisif, who rejected him for not being 'important' enough. What better way is there to become important than unifying the petty kingdoms of Norway under one crown? The ambition to become king and prove himself to gain his princess's affections is a primary motivator for his character, driving many of his actions. Emotion over reason also gets the better of him a few times. It also yields one of my favorite scenes, which is a conversation between him and Queen Aslaug, who is Ragnar Lothbrok's wife and is very telling about the kind of man he is (@ Hirst, drop your location, I just wanna talk about season 6, because y u do that).

Aslaug: Why didn't you just take her? Harald: That's a good question, Queen Aslaug, but, uh, I don't know. I liked her spirit. I decided I had to be worthy of her.

Harald's also a very skilled warrior (you don't get to call yourself a king back in the day without having to survive and win a few battles), even as he gets more silver in his whiskers, his battle prowess never diminishes. Sigh, what a man. He often has his brother, Halfdan the Black (♥), around during battles. Their combined skills and general joy/enthusiasm before and during the heat of battle is why I (and a lot of others) call them the murder bros. Just look at them, both thrilled to kick some Saxon ass. Look at my boys, off to destroy people, I love you both. Another point I enjoy about Harald is he knows when's beat, and can admit it —as well as admitting when others are better strategists (e.g., Ragnar and then Ivar). He’s somehow both humble and arrogant.

If you know something about history, then you might know Harald Finehair was the first King of Norway, and the show embraces this piece of history, though it is a pyrrhic victory for Harald in many senses. He's lost so much along the path to finally wear the crown and title of King of all Norway and realizes maybe, in the end, it wasn't worth it. Harald makes it known that he regrets killing Halfdan (often), that he mourns his wife (which is a whole other topic. And maybe I'm in the minority, but even given the questionable circumstances of their marriage, I liked Harald and Astrid together, it shows that for the most part, he'd be a good husband in a better situation), mourns his unborn child (even though it's implied to not be his). Harald's story in the show makes me immensely sad that they did not include Ragnhild the Mighty, or at least allow him to be in a truly happy marriage.

But alas, Harald was Viking. He lived as Viking and died as a Viking, and he surely feasts in Valhalla with Halfdan now. And thus, I will leave you to ponder the wonder of King Harald Finehair with my favorite quote from him in the show:

Harald: I will not bargain for my life. For a Viking that would be demeaning. To us, death is bliss, and I rush to bleed.