#i'm going to try my best to include all potential triggers that were in here but please let me know if i missed any! | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

rayslittlekitten · 1 year

Text

Can I?

A/N: Okay y'all. It's here, it's done. Y'all voted on this a while back and it was a bit challenging as I made the mistake of starting to write it with Will in mind so I had to make adjustments, but I think I figured it out. Thank you so so much to @musings-of-a-rose for taking a look at this for me. You are a doll!

Rating: E (18+ ONLY)

Word Count: 6,033

Pairing: Benny Miller x BFF! F! Reader

Plot: A night of unexpected events occur when you and your best friend innocently test out sex toys you had drunkenly purchased for shits and giggles.

WARNINGS: This is the first fic I am NOT including warning tags because I don't want to spoil anything. There's nothing typically potentially triggering like dark stuff (i.e. CNC) but still I wanted to keep it a mystery going in. SO PLEASE PROCEED WITH CAUTION! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!

Your friends were supposed to watch the fight with you tonight but they had bailed with some excuse or two except for your best friend. You thought that his brother would at least still be joining as they usually do everything together - like you wouldn’t be surprised if you found out they hold each other’s dicks while the other pisses - but it’s just going to be you and him tonight. Instead of going to the bar like originally planned, you both decided to pick up a case of beer and hang out at your place. It’s cheaper and less crowded.

There’s a rap at your apartment door and you go to open it. As expected, it's your best friend with the supply.

“Hey, Benny! Just in time!”

"Hey, you got a package," Benny says as he hands you the beer. He bends down to pick up the small brown box off the floor by your door. "What did you order?"

"I have no idea what that is," you reply as you make your way over to the kitchen to stick it in the fridge. "I don't remember ordering anything. Where does it say it's from?"

"The return address just says Warehouse, in Ohio," he replies, inspecting the non-descript package and following you further into your apartment after shutting the door behind him.

He hands you the cardboard box before taking his jacket off and making himself at home. You rip open the package and after seeing the contents, you laugh out loud.

"What's so funny?" he asks, walking closer to you.

"This was a drunk purchase. I totally forgot about these!" You reach in to pull out the items and show him your new purchases.

"What are those?" He looks perplexed.

“This one is a vibrator I keep seeing on Instagram, but it's supposed to be like, amazing," you answer.

"How the hell are you supposed to use that?" He takes one of the packages from you and inspects it, looking at the pictures on the box.

"Well, one way you can use it is you insert this side into your pussy and this part is supposed to sit on your clit," you point and explain to him. "It also comes with a detached remote so someone else can control it.

"I don't know if that's a terrible time or a great time."

"The vibration is supposed to be very powerful but quiet," you add. "Supposed to be discreet. They try to sell it by showing women supposedly wearing it in public under their clothes without anyone apparently knowing and their partner has control of it and she's like losing her shit."

"I'm curious now."

"For science!" You declare as you snatch the package from him. You start opening it up and pull the contents out. "Shit, it needs AAA batteries. TV remote!"

You head to the living room and he follows you. You take the batteries out of your TV remote and shove them into the new toy. After turning it on, it buzzes lightly in your hand, moving subtly.

"Let's see how crazy it can get." You start playing with the buttons until it goes up to the highest setting and Ben's eyes get wide as saucers watching it flop around in your palm, practically jumping out of your hand.

"Jesus Christ!" Benny hops back.

"Yeah, now imagine that between your legs."

"I'm not sure I want to. Looks like it would scramble all the sperm inside my balls. Besides, I don't think it was made for my body parts," he points out.

"You just don’t have an imagination," you jab. "Hmm, should we test drive it?" you suggest as you shut it off.

“What do you mean?" he asks curiously.

"See if the hype is real," you answer. "Especially that other one." You point to the other toy that's still in its package.

"That one's supposed to feel like your clit is actually getting sucked on."

"I didn't even know such toys exist," he confesses.

"There are soooo many sex toys out there, you don't even know. Why don't you go get us some cold ones while I figure these out?" you suggest.

"You really wanna do this?” He checks again.

"Yeah, why not? It's not like we have anything else better to do except watch two grown men beat each other up," you state. “Come on, this isn’t any different than the time we accidentally found Will’s porn stash and you got a boner.”

“Yeah, but I didn’t jerk off.”

“You totally did. Not in front of me, but you were not discreet when you snuck off to the bathroom with one of his magazines to ‘take a shit’,” you look at him knowingly.

“Okay, fine,” he shrugs and adjusts his forward-facing cap. “You have a point.” He heads back into the kitchen to grab some beer.

When he comes back with two opened bottles in hand, he finds you reading the manual and reviewing the other toy.

"So how exactly are we testing these?" he asks, settling down next to you on the couch and taking a gulp of his beer.

"Well, I'm not gonna stick it down my pants if that's what you're thinking. Would that be too weird?” You scrunch your nose while looking over at your best friend who looks just as clueless.

"I don't know. That's why I'm asking. It ain't going down my pants. No amount of alcohol is gonna get that to happen."

"Okay, I didn't think this through. I mean, I guess we can just test it on our arms or something," you shrug cluelessly, thinking of the first thing that comes to mind and then going back to the manual.

"How would that work?" Benny asks as he takes the remote sitting next to him, inspecting it.

As you begin to answer, he starts randomly pressing buttons and you shriek, jumping in your seat. Benny also jumps back, spilling some of his beer as he reacts to your sudden outburst.

"What the hell?!" He looks over to you.

You instantly reach for the vibrator that happened to be sitting between your legs, snug against the front of your pants and toss it at him. Benny tries to dodge it like it's a dead cockroach, but it lands on his lap and he immediately launches himself off the couch. The vibrator continues to bounce around the cushion of the couch until Benny finally shuts it off.

"What the hell was that, man?" Benny looks over at you.

"It was between my legs when you turned it on, you ass!"

“Well, what the hell was it doing there? You said you weren't gonna test it that way."

"I wasn't! It just happened to be there while I was reading on how to operate the other one. Why'd you turn it on?" You shoot back.

"I don't know what the hell I'm doing!" He shouts. "This shit is like rocket science! How do you women even use these things?"

"Men use them too," you correct him.

“Well, clearly I never have," he admits and returns to his seat, flicking the vibrator towards you to make room for himself.

"You're such a prude. It's not like I was wearing it," you say, grabbing it away from him.

"I'm not a prude! You freaked out so I freaked out." He takes another gulp of his beer.

"Whatever," you mumble, still feeling a bit flustered and embarrassed by what had happened. You turn your attention back to the other toy.

"Wait, you've never used any sex toys before?" you shift your attention back to him.

"Nope," he shakes his head.

"Not even with a partner?" You raise a brow.

"Well, one time this girl wanted to make things interesting and suggested a dildo, but it wasn't for her," he starts. "She wanted to stick that up my ass and I was not about that. Especially not after what I had for lunch that day."

"Aww, no peggy for Benny?" you exaggerate a pout.

"Hey, you should think twice about who you're poking fun of.” He shows you the remote in his hand and turns it back on, spooking you when the vibrator goes off between you and Benny.

"Okay, you're having too much fun with that." You reach over to grab the remote from him but he moves it away from your reach.

You lean in further, but his long arm prevents you from getting access to it. At this point, you’re practically climbing on top of him.

“You’re right. This is fun,” he laughs.

When you get close, he transfers the remote to his other hand so you shift yourself but lose your balance, landing back on the still-on vibrator. You shriek and Benny laughs at you. He turns the setting to the highest as you try to get away from it in your awkward position.

"Benny! You can't just go from 1 to 100 instant—" You finally roll off of it and give yourself a moment. With your eyes closed and teeth digging hard into your lower plump lip, you try to get yourself together.

“Are- are you okay?” Benny asks as his laugh dwindles. “Did you have an orgasm or something?” he jokes.

“No…” you start. “But maybe I almost did - maybe!”

His laugh finally dies, but a smirk remains on his face.

“Seriously?!” His eyes grow wide, turning his body towards you.

“That toy is no joke,” you point to it still wriggling on the couch. “And now I really wanna know what it can do.”

Benny shuts it off and his eyes shuttle between the toy and you.

“Uh… like, now?” He questions.

You stare at him for a few seconds, contemplating.

“That would be weird, right?” You ask with a squinted eye. “Never mind, forget it—”

“Have at it,” Benny interrupts. “Now I wanna see what this thing can do, too.”

“Really?” You ask with a raised brow, surprised.

“Yeah, like you said, what else is there to do? For science!” He brings up his beer bottle to celebrate it.

“Dork,” you chuckle, snatching the toy.

“Also, maybe I can learn a thing or two from it,” he replies. “Not that I need any help in that department, but I’m always open to learning new things,” he adds.

You roll your eyes.

“Hey, I’m a fighter and a lover. And I’m great at both,” he winks.

“Are you done stroking your own ego?” You look at him, unimpressed.

“I’m sorry. Yes, you can go on to stroke yourself,” he answers, trying to keep a straight face but ends up cracking a smirk.

“You’re so dumb,” you roll your eyes again and try not to crack your own.

“But I gotta be the one in control.” He holds up the remote in his hand.

“Benny-“

“I may never have the opportunity to ever do this again,” he says. “Besides, isn’t it what makes this fun? Someone else controlling it?”

You stare back at him and think about it.

“Okay, fine, but-“ you point a finger at him.

“I promise I won’t go from zero to 100, okay? Scout’s honor.” Benny brings his three middle fingers up.

“You weren’t a boy scout,” you point out.

“Fuck you. I was one for like a month,” he corrects you. “So are we doing this or what?”

“Turn around,” you tell him.

“What? I can’t watch?”

“Not watch me put this on. Turn around,” you repeat.

He rolls his eyes and turns his whole body around so the back of his head is facing you. You keep an eye on him as you wrangle your jeans and slip the toy inside you until it fits snug. Benny takes a sip of his beer as he waits patiently. He hears you fumbling around and finally you tell him he can turn back around.

He turns to face you and he looks confused.

“What?” You ask him.

“You have it on? Under your jeans?”

“Yes. I wasn’t gonna let it all hang out willy-nilly,” you tell him. “If you don’t believe me, turn it—“

Before you can finish your sentence, Benny flips the switch and you seize up. He can’t hear it, but your reaction confirms you have it in. He watches you as you stay still and quiet for a few moments.

“Can I up the speed?” He asks.

“Is this the lowest setting?” You calmly shoot back.

“Uh, yeah I think so.” He looks down at the remote to see if there’s any indication.

“Okay, go up one notch. One!” You glare at him.

“Okay, here we go.” He turns it up and you twitch.

You start shifting around in your seat until you feel the vibrator is in optimal position.

“How many speeds does this thing have again?” You ask out loud, reaching for the instruction manual and scanning it. “TEN?”

“Well, here’s number three,” Benny says as he ups the speed.

“Ben— ohhhhh…” Your scolding got cut short when the vibrator starts to really hit the right spots.

The tip of the dildo part tickles your g-spot as the outer part flickers over your clit. You close your eyes and bite your lower lip, trying to concentrate and keep your composure.

“Shit, shit, shit, shit,” you mumble.

“Uh… how are you doing?” He asks, not sure what else to do.

“I’m… “ you freeze up for a quick second and then relax, letting out a heavy breath. “Jeeeesus,” you hiss.

Benny remains quiet as he watches you slightly gyrate against the couch. You close your legs together and cross your knees, trying to recalibrate yourself for the ideal position. He notices your breathing has gotten heavier.

“Higher?” He asks quietly, afraid to interrupt your flow.

“I’m already slipping all around,” you answer without opening your eyes, almost forgetting you aren’t alone.

“That’s not a no…” he points out.

Your teeth digs even deeper into your lower lip as you contemplate whether you want to chase your impending orgasm or not. You hate that at the current setting, it’s only enough to edge you and need a bit more to get you over the top.

“Okay,” you finally say. “Do it.”

Benny takes it to number four and you yelp instantly.

"Oh my god," you start giggling. "This is fucking crazy!"

Your thighs tightly clamp together and your back arches off the couch. You throw your head back as your jaw drops open, letting out a silent scream. Your hips rock against the vibrator, trying to get to the finish line.

"I'm not gonna lie. This is getting me hard."

You open your eyes and glance over at him to see him palming the front of his jeans and rubbing himself through the denim as he watches you trying not to lose your shit.

“How close are you?" he asks.

You feel your face get really warm all of a sudden. His baby blues pierce your eyes and you're suddenly feeling more vulnerable than you already are, like you just got caught doing something you shouldn't be doing, but at the same time, it’s kinda hot seeing Benny turned on watching you to the point where he’s quasi-touching himself. Noticing your state of shock, he amps up the vibration and you let out an uncontrolled moan.

"Oh, fuck!“

Your hips buck off the couch as your orgasm comes crashing down on you. You continue to moan as you ride the wave and try to catch the next one, grinding down on the couch. You don’t even care how silly you might look to Ben right now. All your focus is what’s going on between your legs. Suddenly the vibrator gets stronger again.

“Ben, stop! It’s too much!” You shriek.

You’re relieved when the torture stops, but it also feels odd as you feel the residual buzzing between your legs.

“So… how was it?” Benny breaks the silence. “Was it all your hopes and dreams?”

You take a moment to yourself to process the experience before answering.

“This shit is… I don’t think I ever want to experience the highest setting on this thing,” you tell him. “This thing is like a torture device. It feels like I pissed myself.”

You turn to look at him as you catch your breath and you’re reminded that Benny’s having his own fun with this, bringing you back down to earth. He scoots a bit closer to you with his hand still over his crotch. This new tension is clearly mutually felt as you both stare at each other, waiting for the other person to say or do something first. Your eyes ping pong between his face and his crotch, which he is still lazily rubbing.

“So uh… what now?” Benny asks, licking his lips. “Round two?” he brings up the remote still in his hand.

“N-no! No, no! Don’t you dare-“ you reach for the remote again, but he pulls it back behind him.

You chase after it, lunging towards him and end up getting right in his face.

“Benny!” You try again, but pause when you catch him staring at you, his face no more than a few inches away from yours.

It may be the post-orgasm bliss or the awkward position you both found yourselves in, but you’ve never noticed how easy on the eyes your best friend is. He swallows hard as his eyes scan your face.

“Can… can I kiss you?" he asks suddenly, leaning in and nudging your nose with his, testing the boundaries.

You lick your dry lips and swallow as you glance down at his mouth, seeing it slowly closing the distance. He ghosts his lips over yours, stopping short of actually putting it on yours, waiting for your permission. You answer his question by closing the gap, slotting your mouth over his.

He kisses back, gently at first, matching your energy. When you slip your tongue into his mouth, he cups your face and returns the gesture. You’re both now devouring each other as he turns his body towards you to get into a more comfortable position, adjusting himself to accommodate the bulge in his jeans.

You both continue to make out with more urgency. Benny’s hands start cautiously exploring your body, placing a hand on your waist at first. It wanders down to your hip and he gives it a squeeze. Your own hands start roaming Benny’s body, touching his hard chest first. His warmth is welcoming, making you twist your body and lean into him. Feeling bold, Benny’s hand wanders to your thigh, his fingers brushing the inside, but far from your wet patch.

“Can I touch you down there?” He mumbles between kisses while moving his mouth to the side of your face and down your neck.

“Wha-“ You let out a loud sigh when you feel his soft wet tongue on the side of your neck, shivering when he grazes a sensitive spot.

“Can I touch you down there?” Ben repeats, pulling back, his lust-filled eyes looking down into yours.

His fingers barely scrapes your inner thigh, but you feel the jolt of his touch travel up to where the vibrator is still sitting.

“Please?” He squeaks out as his fingers travel up higher and his breathing gets heavier, matching yours.

Even though the vibrator isn’t on, it still brushes against your clit every time you shift and it’s only making you want Benny more, to help you get some relief. Even though you’ve already cum, you are hornier than ever right now.

You simply nod before capturing his mouth again. You moan into his mouth when you feel his hand cupping you, rubbing small slow circles with his fingers. Your hips twitch when he drags his middle finger up and down the thick seam of your pants that’s pressing directly down the center of the outer part of the vibrator which is sitting directly on your clit. He’s barely putting any pressure, but you’re hypersensitive right now and it feels like torture.

Now impatient, you start undoing your pants, trying to quickly get them off. You break the kiss to take a few seconds to focus on ridding your jeans. Benny watches you as he palms himself again, touching himself like he did with you. When you finally get your jeans off, tossing it over the couch, you reach into your underwear to remove the bane of your current existence - the vibrator. Without much effort, the vibrator basically falls out of you. It is drenched in your arousal, a thin sticky string still connects you to it.

It made an audible noise when it slipped out of you, as did Benny. Before you can discard the very used toy, Benny’s hand is back on you, his fingertips teasing the band of your underwear. He keeps dipping further and discovers how slick you really are.

"Jeeeeesus Christ, you weren't kidding. That shit got you so fucking wet," he comments while teasing your opening, slowly dipping his fingertip in, putting light pressure against it but it took no effort to penetrate you.

An audible squelch can be heard when he enters a second finger. You moan, feeling his thick fingers filling you and stroking you inside. He’s definitely reaching places the vibrator couldn’t. He hums watching your face distort when he pushes in further.

Your hand grips his strong forearm, feeling his veins raised and his muscles flexing underneath your palms as he pumps his long fingers in and out of you. The tip of his tongue darts out and licks the corner by his upper lip as he starts curling his fingers up, reaching for that soft spongy spot at the roof of your vagina. Your legs open up wider for him as his fingertips rub your g-spot over and over again. Your senses are heightened watching him watching you with darkened eyes. His thumb starts rubbing your clit as he massages your g-spot and it doesn’t take long for your orgasm to peak. You rock your hips against his fingers as your muscles continually clench and release over his fingers.

"Holy sh-shit," you tremble, feeling the aftershocks.

He pulls his fingers out, dragging them over your clit along the way, making your body twitch at the sensitivity.

“I think I made you cum faster than that toy did,” he jokes.

You crack a half smile but you don’t have the brain power to conjure up a verbal response. After a shared moment, he leans in to give you a quick peck on your lips. As he gets up off the couch, Benny takes his cap off to adjust the position of it, switching it backwards before settling between your legs.

The front of your thin cotton panties are completely drenched through. He can see your outline as the damp fabric clings to your puffy lips.

“Can I taste you?”

His puppy eyes peek up from between your legs. Your brain is mush so you simply nod.

He bunches the top of your underwear in his hand and yanks it up, causing it to brush across your clit. Your hips twitch and as he continues to rub the fabric over you, seeing your reaction to it and drawing out the tease. You moan and gyrate your hips when he puts his mouth between your legs over your underwear. He laps up your juices, licking and sucking as he continues to tug at your panties taut against your dripping cunt, putting pressure on your sensitive nub.

"Ben…" you pant as you push his cap off and run your fingers through his messy dirty blonde hair.

His scruff brushes the insides of your thigh as he continues to eat you out. You gasp when you feel the tip of his tongue breaching your opening, forcing your underwear aside and exposing your core. He puts more pressure with his tongue, slipping in deeper inside you and tasting you. Your hips start rocking against his face, but his tongue can only go so far. He shifts his attention to the swollen bud a little higher, scrunching your panties aside. He circles your clit with the tip before pressing the flat of his tongue and then his mouth over it, hollowing out his cheeks as he sucks hard. Your thighs clamp around his head and his eyes focus on your face as his tongue continues to play your clit like a fiddle. He grips your hips and holds you down.

“F-fuck…” your breathing becomes irregular as your orgasm builds.

With his mouth still attached to you, he slips his finger inside you to try to find that spot again. You thrust against his face when you feel your third release breaching. Benny intensifies his sucking and fingering, feeling you clench around him. You cry out when the dam breaks and you convulse around him. He doesn’t stop until you still. As you’re coming down from your high, body slouched from being spent, he withdraws his fingers and licks them clean.

“So you wanna try that other toy now to see how it compares to the real thing?” He asks as he stands up and wipes his mouth.

He was right about him not needing any help in the bedroom department. You can barely form words right now. Never in a million years would you think your best friend can eat pussy like an expert. Taking from his brother who he regularly competes with, he always strives to be the best in everything he does, but this is on a whole different level. And now he wants to use another toy on you? You don’t think anything can top what he just did to you.

"W-what?" you ask cluelessly, still recovering the most mind blowing oral sex you have ever received.

Your eyes follow him as he reaches for the suction toy to show you. He tries to figure out how to turn it on as he kneels down, returning between your legs.

"You gotta help me out here--"

He's suddenly interrupted when you grab his face and smash your lips against his, tasting yourself. He abandons the toy somewhere and moves up to the couch next to you. You reposition yourself to straddle his lap as you continue to make out. As your hands wander down to the buttons of his jeans, he grabs your ass, squeezing them in his large hands.

When you successfully get his jeans undone, he lifts his hips and helps you pull down his bottoms until he springs free. You look down and reach for his thick cock, warm and soft to the touch. You jerk him as he’s already hard as a rock. Your thumb brushes the underside of his head.

“Fuck,” he hisses.

Now it’s your turn to torture him. You slide off his lap and on to the floor, kneeling between his knees. Once in a comfortable position, you grab his length, licking a trail from the base to the tip, maintaining eye contact the entire time. When you get to the top, you wrap your lips around him, wetting the head a bit before inching down to taste the rest of him. Your tongue swirls around his smooth and salty skin, lubricating him as you bob up and down.

“Shhhhit…” He throws his head back against the couch.

Feeling frisky, you try to deep throat him and he grasps within arms reach whatever he can as he groans. He looks over when a hand grabs something unfamiliar to him. It’s the vibrator and an idea comes to his mind.

“Wait,” he reluctantly stops you.

You pause and see him holding up the vibrator.

“Put this on while you suck me. I think it’ll be fun.”

You look at the vibrator for a moment and then back at him.

“I promise I won’t put it so high,” he reassures you.

“Fine,” you agree and you take it from him and slip it inside you, orienting it the right way. “You try anything and I’ll bite your dick off,” you warn, drawing a small chuckle out of Ben.

You get back into the position you were in before and put your mouth back on him. As you go back to sucking him, you yelp when Benny turns the vibrator on at a low speed. The noise you made sent a delightful vibration down his cock, making it twitch. He turns it up a notch and your hips move against the vibrator. You start moving up and down on him a little faster, stroking the base where your mouth can’t reach. You deepthroat him again until you gag, but you keep on going, sending your spit dripping down his cock and lubing him up.

“You look so fucking hot,” Benny pants.

His breathing is getting more labored. His hips jerk up and he places a hand on the back of your head. He’s not putting any pressure, but he fists your hair. He doesn’t pull on it, just moves with you as you fuck him with your mouth. You start quickening your pace feeling the vibrator getting stronger, trying to match it. Feeling the beginning of an orgasm forming, you rock your hips and suck him harder.

“Fuck, I’m gonna cum,” he warns you.

Not changing your rhythm, you watch him come undone as he pops in your mouth. He thrust into your face as his moans echo in the small space and grasps the remote in his hand, accidentally jumping it up another level, but it’s what you needed to push you over the edge. You grind against the toy as you moan with him still deep inside your mouth. He spills out of the corner of your mouth as his hips slow down.

When he stills, you suck him clean and swallow the load that remained in your mouth. You reach down to pull the vibrator off and toss it onto his lap. Benny jumps in his seat and shuts it off. You wipe the corner of your mouth and chin with the back of your hand as you get up off your knees. He looks back at you with tired eyes as he tries to catch his breath, cock twitching. You squeal when he grabs your wrist and pulls you into his lap, careful with his half hard cock. You straddle his lap and he kisses you, his tongue thrusting into your mouth, tasting a bit of himself. The two of you lazily make out for a bit until Benny pulls back. You lick your lips and smile, looking down at him.

“We should start making this a regular thing, ya know. The toy testing,” Benny suggests, breaking the awkward silence and lightening the mood.

“Well, I do have a dildo I haven’t tried yet,” you half-joke.

He looks back at you with narrow eyes.

“You’re not putting that in my ass,” he states.

“Not what I was thinking,” you chuckle as you shake your head. “I’ve always wanted to know what it felt like to be double penetrated,” you explain.

Benny stares at you with a blank expression, but you see his semi twitch in your peripheral.

“Gi-give me maybe fifteen minutes—“ he finally says, pointing to his softening cock.

“Whoa! Hold it there, cowboy,” you stop him. “Why don’t we just think on that? Besides, I don’t have any condoms or lube for that to happen.”

“Yeah, okay. Sure,” he shrugs. “I-I had a good time, if that’s what you were wonder—“

You silence him with a tender kiss before grabbing the vibrator to remove the batteries and toss them at him.

“I’m gonna clean up. Why don’t you put the fight on? I think It’s starting soon,” you tell him as you dismount him and grab your jeans off the floor while Benny pulls his bottoms back up.

“Look what the guys missed out on. Coulda had an orgy,” you joke.

“If everyone showed up, we’d be at a bar,” he points out, then swishes some beer inside his mouth.

“Fair. Okay, a Miller sandwich then,” you switch it up.

Benny chokes on his beer.

“Kidding!” You chuckle awkwardly. “Kinda. Sorry, you probably don’t wanna think about you and your brother fucking the same person at the same time,” you snort before finally heading to the bathroom.

When you get back, you find Benny putting his phone away and relaxing on the couch like he was before any of the sexy stuff had happened, with the TV on. The awkwardness returns. He hands you your beer as you sit down next to him, settling in. You both quietly watch the fight as it starts, but you steal glances at each other every now and then. At one point, you do a double take.

“Dude, are you smelling your fingers?” You look at him incredulously.

“What? I washed them, but I can still smell you.”

You grimace at him.

“Don’t look at me like that. You smell good,” he shrugs. “It’s actually getting me hard again.”

You watch him adjust himself. The both of you stare each other down, trying to read each other until a knock on your door breaks the trance.

“Who the hell is that?” You ask, but Benny shrugs.

You get up to open the door and find the other Miller brother on the other side.

“Hey, sorry I’m late! I had trouble finding parking. Did the fight start already?”

You look back at him confused.

“Uh… are you gonna let me in?” Will asks. “I brought goodies.” He shows the case of beer and grocery store bag in his hand with a party sized bag of chips peeking out.

“Sorry, I just thought you weren’t coming,” you tell him while letting him in.

“I texted Benny telling him plans changed last minute. Did he not get it?”

“Uh, I-I don’t know. He didn’t tell me anything.” You lead him into the living room where Benny almost looks surprised.

“Did you not tell her I’m coming?” Will asks his brother.

“Oh, sorry, forgot. I was uh, a little preoccupied,” he apologizes.

Will looks at both you and Benny suspiciously.

“It smells… interesting in here,” he comments, his eyebrows furrow with curiosity.

“Oh my gosh, I’m sorry Will. Let me take that from you.” You quickly change the subject, taking the bag and beer out of his hands.

“Wait-” Will starts.

“Get comfy. I’ll bring you back a cold beer,” you tell him before whisking away.

You stick the beer in the fridge and when you remove the party sized tortillas to pour some into a bowl, you notice some unexpected items in the bag. You take them out for a closer inspection and your eyes widen at the bottle of lube and a box of condoms. Maybe he bought these before his initial plans got changed.

You shrug, throw them back into the bag and return to the living room with a bowl of chips, cold beer and the grocery bag of personal items. When you walk into the living room, the brothers turn their attention to you, eyeing you like they’re expecting something other than the beer and chips. You look back at them suspiciously as they’re both very laxed and spread out on the couch on each end, leaving a space for you in between. As you walk over and settle in next to them, their gaze follows you.

“Here Will, I think these are yours,” you hand him a beer and his bag of items.

He takes them from you as he smirks.

“Thanks. So,” Will turns his body towards you. “Benny tells me you’re curious about some DP action.”

You almost drop the bowl of chips in your hands. Will is usually very reserved and diplomatic so you’re a bit shocked at how straight forward he is right now. You glare at your best friend who shrugs helplessly.

“I had to tell him what he missed out on.”

You glower your eyes at Benny, but then put two and two together, your focus now bouncing between the two brothers and realize that no one is probably going to watch this fight tonight.

#benny miller #triple frontier #benny miller fanfiction #benny miller x female reader #benny miller x f! reader #benny miller x reader #benny miller x you #triple frontier fanfiction #bff to lovers

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marmolady · 8 months

Text

WIP Dump!

I am actually still writing Endless Summer fanfic, believe it or not. It's just... slow. @mauvecatfic @rhemenway888 @sceptilemasterr I'm still here, quiet though I am!

In addition to the fics mentioned here, I'm also working on my 'Montoya grandchildren' collection, and my 'reunions' collection, and at some write some more glimpses into other Catalysts' family lives. As my 'main' post-canon story is long concluded, I'm mostly doing slice of life stuff and not much too heavy. That is, except for potential explorations of the end of the Catalysts' lives. I've already written Taylor's death scene. BUT I have been working on that particular fic on and off for literally years.

Snippets below the cut:

The first thing I've been working on is a series of windows into Taylor and Diego's friendship over the years, including far, far into the future. I think it's about halfway written, so it could be the next piece to make an appearance here and on AO3.

A snippet....

“Hey--” Taylor said as she settled down amongst the soft cushions of her favourite chair, knowing full well she’d be needing to call in assistance when the time came to haul her old body up from them, “I came up with the perfect idea for our next marathon.”

“’Marathon’? Between the two of us, we’re lucky to get through one movie without someone dozing off.” Diego grinned at his friend. His best friend of seventy years.

“That’s what makes it a marathon, because it takes so damn long. We take our time, savouring the laughs, the tears, and appreciating the artform.” A glass of wine, some cheeses to break up the films. And the two of them would reminisce, and Diego would point out his favourites of the crew’s filmmaking choices… or those that were notably bad.

“How about ‘the Zac Efron trifecta’?” Taylor suggested, showning her age. “High School Musical, followed by Hairspray, followed by The Greatest Showman.”

“Let’s just see if we can get through ‘Julie Andrews Fest’ first, okay?”

They did this fairly often. Just chilling out to the tune of films meeting their assigned theme. At the age they were, ‘just chilling out’ was pretty much requisite. Taylor’s arthritis had worsened considerably in the last year, and Diego’s respiratory issues were easily triggered by any amount of exertion. They were reasonably healthy nonogenerians… but they were nonogenerians.

______________________

Otherwise, you'll be seeing this next; some nice Taystela Valentine's fluff. Because so help me I love some Taystela fluff, and if anyone deserves ALL-THE-FLUFF it is Estela Montoya.

A snippet:

“‘Safe’ sounds perfect. As long as there’s no danger, people can stare all they want-- I’m in love with this woman, and I could not be less ashamed.”

Again, Estela momentarily glanced from the road to catch her wife’s eye, to return the smile there. “Don’t worry. I’m not taking you anywhere I couldn’t kiss you. I’ve suffered enough in my life.”

Taylor chuckled darkly, the knowing laugh of someone who knew all to well what it was to go through hell and back… and to try and embrace the happy ending on the other side in spite of the traumas that wouldn’t let go.

“I’m glad to hear it,” she said. “On both counts.”

___________________

Aaaaaand my baby Rosa gets to head to La Huerta for the first time!

A snippet:

“Where are you headed?” the driver had asked, to which Rosa’s Mama Taylor had replied with, “It’s a secret-- don’t want to spoil the surprise for the little one.”

Rosa pretty much knew where they were going-- she’d heard all about it-- but it sounded so mysterious, it seemed likely there would be surprises when she got there. So much of what she’d been told sounded like magic. The taxi driver wasn’t part of the family, so they couldn’t talk about the place where they were flying to while he could hear.

They were all headed to the special island, the one where Rosa’s moms first met, years and years ago. It would be Rosa and her new family. And… all these other people. Including Uncle Raj, whom she’d just met the day before. He’d stayed at their house overnight before everyone flew out, and was now sharing their taxi to the airport. It was a little bit scary, because he wasn’t just a new adult to meet, but a very, very big one, and very energetic. But Uncle Raj must have known those things were scary for Rosa, because he’d knelt down to her and talked all calm. He seemed kind and gentle-- and at dinner, he’d even whipped her up a special glittery drink with cotton candy on top. ‘Her signature drink’ he’d called it. Rosa liked Uncle Raj, and she hoped that the other new people would be just as nice.

“Oh, a surprise holiday? Qué niña tan afortunada!”

Rosa could barely hold in a giggle at the sight of Raj, who looked just about to burst with the excitement of the secrets they were keeping from the driver-- well, from all the world. It made her feel better, taking the edge off her jitters. It had to be something good they were on their way to.

__________________________

#endless summer #playchoices #estela montoya #diego soto

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drawing-way-outside-the-lines · 1 year

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➖ Mature content, 18+ ➖ check the trigger tags each time ➖

Chapter 50 - A red string tied between they hearts.

Episode 6

Late evening they were all 4 drunk and at good mood. Worries seemed far away, and with that a sense of freedom. They had all agreed to take it to Malou's room and pump up the music after a late dinner, and since then, a lot of dancing had unfolded. Including some flirting. And a tad jealousy here and there, overshadowed by a bunch of selfies.

Andy: It was just before midnight he disappeared. Knowing he might have a chance with Dalton should probably have settled him, but now, more than ever, watching Dalton and Malou dance close and kiss, made him yearn for it to be him instead. He needed some air. So he went outside, lit a cig, and climbed the roof of his red Ford Mustang Boss. He laid there few minutes, observing the stars, listening to the distant music from the party inside the house. When suddenly he heard footsteps heading in his direction

Dalton: He slowly walked towards Andy, a bit nervous. It was as if suddenly a tension had built between them. Not negative. But highly charged. The old dance about who makes the first move, and when? He slowly climbed up on the hood of the car and laid down on his side, observing Andy you disappeared… are you alright?

Andy: Mh he turned his head and looked at Dalton lightly drunk…

Dalton: He chuckled soft Me too… a bit more than lightly…. okay… a lot more he snorted

Andy: Maybe I'm not too far behind he chuckled hoarse but he said and sat up straight, taking a last drag of his cig before flicking it off the roof never too drunk to dance on the top of my roof! he quickly got up and reached a hand to Dalton

Dalton: He laughed amused oh no! You go ahead, but I'm not as light on my feet as you are!

Andy: He smirked cheekily, and instead of answering started dancing around, showing off some of his best moves he could fit within the limits of the small roof

Dalton: He laid observing Andy for a while, before his wrist started hurting from holding his head, and he rolled to his back instead, observing the stars

Andy: He noticed quick that he had lost Dalton's attention, but wasn't prepared to give up just yet, so he quickly jumped down on the hood of the car Come he reached a hand towards Dalton

Dalton: The alcohol had definitely kicked in by now, the colder night air had made it feel almost twice as much as it was inside, so as he sat up, he sorta for a moment lost orientation and ended up turning around himself

Andy: He chuckled soft Here!

Dalton: He noticed the hand above him and reached up, placing his own hand in Andy's

Andy: He quickly dragged him up and helped him up on the roof There's a better view from up here!

Dalton: He looked around a bit, trying to find his balance

Andy: Woah he grabbed onto Dalton's hips as he tilted a bit Try to stay up here though.

Dalton: He chuckled cheekily I'll try to stay on top this time

Andy: He chuckled a bit awkward, not sure if Dalton was too drunk or actually flirting with him, but before he could get to ask, the sound of Malou and Raven joining them on the street, interrupted him Dammit!

Malou: Riding on Raven's back, laughing loudly Not so fucking fast! I'm gonna fall off!!!

Raven: Laughing Then hold on!!!

Andy: He suddenly noticed it had started to rain. Just a couple drops here and there, but definitely enough to make the roof less safe to climb around on. Normally he wouldn't give many shits about it, but he was worried of Dalton potentially slipping, so he quickly turned around to look after him

Dalton: He was standing at the edge, swinging his arms, kinda spacing out

Andy: Dalton…

Dalton: Mh? he shook his head and looked at Andy

Andy: What are you thinking about?

Dalton: He grinned cheekily that I have to piss.

Andy: He snorted soft Want me to help you down?

Dalton: ….

Andy: Or pull your fucking pants down and do it here he chuckled hoarse just don't piss yourself! He walked a couple steps away and sat down with his back against Dalton, trying to grand him a bit of "privacy". Sure they had seen each other piss before, but, since last nights escapades, that ball had once again been returned to Dalton's side, and it would be up to him if he would still be comfortable with that.

Dalton: About 10 seconds went by it's getting on your window

Andy: He turned to look at Dalton pissing down his back window Well you could have fucking turned slightly left and pissed down on the fucking ground instead! He laughed amused fucking good thing it's raining!

Dalton: It's raining? he looked up at the sky

Raven: He suddenly also jumped up on the car, wanting selfies and such

Andy: As Raven and Malou few minutes later started walking down the street, enjoying a casual stroll, he was once again left alone with Dalton on the roof

Dalton: By now looking at the stars, momentarily lost

Andy: Observing Dalton, butterflies swirling in his stomach, nervously trying to gather courage to try to go for a kiss. It wouldn't be the first time they had kissed after all. Dalton had kissed him twice in the past, and Andy had kissed him back once. It had never been over anyones line. Sure it had been soft quick pecks, and that was exactly what he was planning to go for now. If Dalton would want more, he'd only have to lean into it. Dalton.. he stepped a little closer

Dalton: mh? He looked questioning at Andy

Andy: Stepping as close as he could get, slowly reaching up, gently caressing Dalton's cheek, just about to lean in

Raven & Malou: Scream singing The Beatles It's been a hard days night!

Dalton: Shouting back And I've been working like a do-ooog!!

Raven & Malou: It's been a hard days night!!

Dalton: I should be sleeping like a lo-og!

Andy: Oh for fuck sake!

Malou: Running back towards the car But when I get home to you

Dalton: jumping off the roof I find the things that you do

Malou: Jumping into Dalton's arms

Dalton: easily catching her as she landed against him

Both: Will make me feel a-alright!

Andy: Kicking a leaf off his roof, grumbling to himself

Raven: Casually hanging out on top of a nearby lamp post, observing the scene below

Andy: He jumped off the car and started kicking a few pebbles around, contemplating if he should call it quits for the night or head back inside to get utterly wasted

Malou: Hey! Raven! Dance with me! she pointed at the roof of the car

Raven: He quickly landed on the roof, reaching a hand down to her Mi lady!

Malou: She chuckled amused and grabbed his hand, allowing him to drag her up, and instantly started dancing with him as she landed safely on the red roof

Andy: Shook his head lightly, still feeling jealous about the whole Beatles musical, when suddenly he realised Dalton was missing??? He looked around, unable to spot him anywhere, so he quickly walked around the car, noticing Dalton laying few meters away on the ground, an arm covering his eyes. He quickly walked up to him what on earth are you doing?!

Dalton: Trying to watch the stars…but it's raining! I got drops in my eyes he slurred

Andy: He chuckled hoarsely Get up, you'll get a cold!

Dalton: Drunk moaning

Andy: He lifted a foot and lightly planted it on Dalton's thigh, stepping softly Hey, get up, let's head inside!

Dalton: … He suddenly sat up fast I have to piss again!

Andy: He blinked a couple extra times Okay… Drunky McDrunkison he chuckled hoarsely and once again reached a hand towards Dalton Let me help you up then!

Dalton: He chuckled lightly and allowed Andy to drag him up you know.. you're drunk too he poked Andy's chest a couple times as they stood face to face, then suddenly seemed to once again space out

Andy: …. you okay?

Dalton: …… many muscles

Andy: … he chuckled soft what?

Dalton: ……. He suddenly shook his head and backed away, quickly heading down the street

Andy: He turned and looked after Dalton, then it hit him. He pressed a hand against the spot Dalton had just been poking Oh it's fucking on now! he bit his bottom lip as he realised Dalton was definitely into him! And hurried after him down the street Hey!

Dalton: He looked a bit lost at Andy as he caught up with him and spun around himself a couple times

Andy: He chuckled hoarse Yeah, you just passed your own house man! he chuckled again

Dalton: He shrugged lightly and walked to a flower wall in the middle of the street, and without warning unzipped his pants and started pissing on the wall

Andy: He laughed soft and walked closer When in Rome! quickly unzipping his own pants

It didn't take many seconds before the others caught up with them, there were a couple more selfies shot and Malou balanced on the side of the flower wall that wasn't wet, before they all finally found their way back into the warmth of the house, but not until Malou had remarked that the flowers and trees had sprung early this year! Well knowing Raven had to have had something to do with it. Perhaps a way to try to draw attention. Back inside they all danced some for a long time, drinking more, laughing more, getting caught up in simply letting lose and having fun! And as the night progressed, and beers were steadily emptied, at the very least one person, started to become more and more affectionate.

Dalton: You know he shouted over the music I really really like you!

Andy: Happy smile, not quite knowing what to do with himself and if he should take the chance or not?!

Dalton: Leaning in, squeezing his face against Andy, wrapping an arm around his neck You smell soooo good!!!

Andy: Chuckling happily So do you!

Compliments lead to flirting, flirting lead to more dancing, and suddenly Malou noticed Raven was gone, and since a couple minutes went by and he didn't return yet, she decided to go look for him. She grabbed a couple empty bottles and headed downstairs, having a feeling she might find him in the kitchen. And she did.

Malou: There you are! She spoke warmly as she walked into the kitchen

Raven: Yes, here I am. He was sitting on the kitchen counter, drinking a beer

Malou: She placed the empty bottles and jumped up to sit next to him Too much Andy and Dalton flirting?

Raven: He nodded softly Something like that.

Malou: why don't you give it another try?

Raven: He sighed soft And compete with the peacock? Nah he shook his head lightly

Malou: You know, you're very good at giving the advice of putting yourself first. But you're not very good at taking the advice.

Raven: He snorted soft I know. It's one of my flaws.

Malou: The way I see it is, he's not the only bird here… you have wings too… how about you spread them a little? she smiled encouraging you have told Dalton you like him, so far, that didn't give you much… how about you show him now?

Raven: I don't want to overwhelm him, more than I already did.

Malou: No, I get that, I really do, and I agree. But I am also worried about my friend when I see his head hanging. She sighed soft Dalton is used to a pretty chaotic lifestyle… my guess is we should all worry a little less, and put some faith in him, and the fact that he will most likely adapt faster than any of us assume, including himself. she shrugged lightly he's pretty strong. Yes he has a sensitivity to him as well, and he should from time to time be wrapped in blankets and protected… but… who could be better at doing that, than the people who loves him? And the way I see it is… the more love the better, right?

Raven: He nodded soft and emptied his beer you might be right.

Malou: She chuckled softly Might?

Raven: Okay… you ARE right… and I'll take the advice… but in my own speed… and with caution…

Malou: she nodded lightly fair enough… as long as you do something!

Raven: So bossy! He chuckled soft and placed a kiss on her temple thank you though, I appreciate both the advice and the offer of sharing him, I know that isn't easy.

Malou: She nodded soft you're welcome.

Raven: He jumped off the counter and offered his hand Aye! Better get to it then! Need a lift?

Malou: She chuckled lightly and grabbed his hand, then jumped off the counter, wrapping her arms around him Beam me up, Scotty!

Raven: As they landed in Malou's room, only Andy was there, dancing on his own Hey! Where's Dalton?

Andy: Bathroom!

Raven: Oh! he disappeared

Andy: He frowned soft and stopped dancing

Malou: Come on, don't hang your head like that.

Andy: He sighed deep I feel like I am compeeting with a demon…

Malou: She nodded soft Because you are.

Andy: Thanks a lot! Not very helpful!

Malou: I know Andy she wrapped an arm around his shoulder and slowly dragged him towards her couch to sit down with her But I have a feeling there will be more than plenty for all of us, if we're just a little patient.

In the hallway

Raven: He was waiting, his back leaned against Malou's shut door, as Dalton entered the hallways from the bathroom

Dalton: He chuckled surprised what are you doing here?

Raven: Waiting for you…

Dalton: Oh? You needed to go to the toilet? He pointed backwards with his thumb

Raven: No. I wanted to talk to you. Ask you how you're doing? A lot has been dumped on your plate, and I wanted to make sure you're alright?

Dalton: He smiled soft contemplating a bit, then nodded I'm okay. It's a lot, yes… but not in a negative way. I mean… he shrugged lightly it's nice to know you're liked… right?

Raven: He nodded soft Of course.

Dalton: He slowly walked closer to Raven, stopping right in front of him, looking at him with a soft, insecure, but somewhat cheeky smile May I he pointed at the door behind Raven

Raven: You may he smirked for a small entry fee.

Dalton: He squinted his eyes lightly and looked at Raven suspeciously And what would that fee be?

Raven: A hug.

Dalton: His face lit up lucky for you, I love giving hugs!

Raven: He smiled warm and satisfied and spread his arms out to the side, welcoming Dalton into the hug

Dalton: He chuckled lightly and walked into the hug, wrapping his arms around Raven

Raven: He sighed soft from pleasure of finally feeling Dalton close and took a deep breath of his scent

Dalton: You smell good he mumbled against Raven

Raven: His face lit up So do you.

Dalton: …. They stood like that quite a while till Dalton finally took a deep breath and walked back out of the hug I'm sorry, it's not that I don't… it was really nice…. I really liked it… I'm just he frowned soft and blushed

Raven: Getting horny and needing your boyfriend.

Dalton: His eyes got wide ….. you can read minds too?

Raven: He chuckled lightly No. But I felt your boner towards the end.

Dalton: Awkward chuckle Yeah… uh yeah….

Raven: You should give him a call then

Dalton: He sighed soft He's with Sam, he had a nightmare… it wouldn't be fair, he has to be alone then. I just miss Adrian… a lot… things has been… different after everything with Sam.

Raven: He nodded soft

Dalton: I finally got to see him today, but then Sam called and he said he might come back later tonight, but now it's almost 2am… he sighed soft I really really want him, and I'm sure I shouldn't even say that to you and all but…. yeah I shouldn't, I don't even know why I tell you all this, I'm sorry.

Raven: It's perfectly alright, Dalton he smiled softly I can handle it.

Dalton: … you don't get jealous?

Raven: I do. But not that easy he smiled soft I better go pee though he pointed at the bathroom door and stepped away from Malou's door You're free to go inside he winked

Dalton: Blushing lightly, then he quickly escaped back into Malou's room. His heart pounding a little, his cheeks feeling warm. He shook his head, trying to shake the feeling, but couldn't help but smirk a bit at the fact that Raven seemed to be getting under his skin.

Raven: In the bathroom he quickly dialed a number

Adrian: He picked up on 3rd ring Raven? he whispered softly hang on. Sound of footsteps and a creaking door Sorry he spoke normal now, though still a bit low Sam just fell asleep. I didn't want to wake him.

Raven: I'm sorry to call so late

Adrian: No no, it's alright. Is everything okay?

Raven: Yes.. however, long story short, I'm at Malou and Dalton's… we've all had a lot to drink, everything is fine, so don't worry, I just have a boy over here who really misses you… and I think he's more than ready for you two to finally take it to the next level. As a matter of fact I suggest you do so, unless you want Andy to pop it once again.

Adrian: Low growl Don't talk about him like that!

Raven: You're right, and I don't really want to, but I need to paint a picture to make it clear to you that you need to pull yourself together on this one and stop over protecting him.

Adrian: Fine. But I can't leave Sam alone again, it wouldn't be fair. If he wakes up again he's completely alone, after I said I would stay.

Raven: You could call Niyol.

Adrian: Deeper growl

Raven: He chuckled soft fair enough. He sighed lightly Give me a moment… he quickly pondered about it alright… listen. You'll head to your place and make it romantic… yes, you have to! You pull out all the guns on this one! While you do that, I slowly prepare everyone else here without giving anything away. When you are ready, I can drop Andy off at Sam's, then neither of those two are alone. And then I can drop Dalton off at your place, and return here to help Malou clean up and stay with her. This way no one loses out and no one has to go to bed alone and sad. Would that be reasonable?

Adrian: ….. okay.

Raven: He nodded confirming Take your time. Make it count! And call me when you're ready.

Adrian: Raven…

Raven: Yes?

Adrian: … thank you.

Raven: He smiled softly You can thank me next time you and I get to be alone.

Adrian: Soft snort I'm hanging up now.

Raven: I'd be surprised if you wouldn't. *As they hung up, Raven quickly peed, washed hands and walked back into Malou's room. Sorta bumping into Dalton on the way. I've talked with your boyfriend and come up with a plan. He has a couple things to take care of, and once he's done, he'll call me and I will drop you off at his place to spend the night. I'll drop Andy off at Sam's so those two wont be alone, and I'll come back here to stay with Malou, so no one is left behind. That way you can finally get to spend the night with Adrian *he smiled soft*

Dalton: Jaw drop, starring at Raven with open mouth, trying to process

Raven: …. soft chuckle

Dalton: …….

Raven: Take your time…

Dalton: Seeing Raven in a new light… smitten… blushing….a touch of swirly butterflies in his stomach, a goofy smile tucking at his lips

Raven: Definitely noticing, rasing an eyebrow as he spoke in a lower more intimate voice now is not the time.

Dalton: For what?

Raven: Falling for me he smirked lightly you have an important date soon.

Dalton: Blushing bright red as he noticed himself, quickly trying to focus on something else

Raven I'll go tell the others

Dalton: No! He leaned closer towards Raven what if it's just the beer?

Raven: He chuckled amused first of, it's not just the beer he answered with a confident smirk secondly, I meant about my plan.

Dalton: Oh blushing even more, fumbling awkwardly with his hands

Raven: No more beer now though, it wouldn't be a crime if you sobered up a bit before your big night he winked and walked away, heading for Malou

Dalton: …. *chuckling with a mix of surprise and happiness, what a turn of events! And Adrian had actually agreed to!!!! *He bit his bottom lip and quickly put his beer down on the nearest surface, standing a bit locked in place, just smiling dumb at the floor, till he finally managed to walk closer to Malou's desk and grab a pack of cigs, lighting one. He took only a drag before someone walked up next to him, and stopped literally shoulder against shoulder with Dalton. His stomach fluttered again.*

Raven: everything is in motion, we are simply waiting to hear from Adrian now. I kept it delicate of course. Malou knows why you're going, and she's okay with it. And Andy knows only that you are going cause Adrian didn't make it back here.

Dalton: He nodded soft, a strong urge to touch Raven, to connect, wawing through his body, making him buzz with electricity

Raven: He stood still for a moment, enjoying the buzzing anticipation, which judging by Dalton's face, he was surely also feeling! Then he slowly reached out, just his hand, barely moving, to keep it a secret moment between the two of them. Simply and very lightly, brushing a finger against Dalton's hand. Then another.

Dalton: He sighed soft from the tickly sensations spreading through his body, scared to break the spell if he moved. He closed his eye, smiling soft, and allowed himself to get lost in the intimate exchange for just a brief moment, as he himself brushed a finger against Raven's hand.

Raven: He smiled soft and looked at Dalton with a warm gaze I want you to enjoy yourself tonight he spoke warm and calming

Dalton: I will he nodded slow

Raven: We'll meet up one day soon, I promise.

Dalton: He nodded confirming

Malou: Oi! You two! Why don't you join us up here?

Raven: He quickly stepped away from Dalton and looked towards Malou and Andy sitting on her bunk bed, then in an instant landed next to her, smiling back down at Dalton

Dalton: He took a deep breath, then quickly climbed the bunk and found a free space on the other side of Andy, settling there.

They all sat on the bed, losely talking, legs dangling off the side for at least 15 minutes

Dalton: His head was slowly starting to nod, so he kicked off his boots, dragged his feet up in bed and leaned his back against Andy, thinking a power nap might be good to gather a bit of energy before Adrian's call. But he only closed his eyes for a couple minutes before Raven's phone rang

Raven: He nodded at everyone and looked at Dalton He's ready.

Dalton: He nodded confirming, his heart starting to beat a little faster from anticipation. He quickly crawled towards Raven, and gave Malou a hug on the way

Malou: Have fun she spoke in a warm voice and kissed him gently

Dalton: He nodded soft, smiled at Andy and then turned towards Raven I'm ready too

Raven: He nodded confirming, then wrapped his arms around Dalton, nodding at the others I'll be right back.

Dalton: They landed in Adrian's living room, his fingers dug into Raven's chest I uhh

Adrian: He stood up slow from his couch and walked up to them, smiling warmly at both of them

Dalton: He quickly let go of Raven and took a couple steps back

Raven: Soft smile

Adrian: May I talk with you for a while?

Dalton: I uh have to pee anyway, he hurried and headed for the door*

Adrian: He sighed soft as they were alone Are you sure he's ready? I mean I definitely am! But…I'm also… nervous!

Raven: He smiled soft at Adrian He's more than ready, I guarantee you. Stop worrying. He grabbed Adrian's hands, stroking them lightly with his thumbs Just take it slow, everything will be alrigt.

Adrian: I know…he sighed soft but it still feels like the very first time.

Raven: And it is, for Dalton.

Adrian: He frowned soft

Raven: He shook his head lightly Don't let that get to you. He remembers very little. I'm sure it will still feel like first time for him. Specially if you allow it to he smiled soft and encouraging

Adrian: He nodded soft and he's not too-

Raven: No, he's barely tipsy by now. Apparently it more or less sobered him up, hearing that you were up he chuckled lightly

Adrian: He shook his head lightly at Raven's choice of words

Raven: Right, I better head back and give you two the privacy you deserve he smiled soft

Adrian: He nodded soft and leaned in, kissing Raven lovingly

Raven: He leaned into the kiss, returning it with the same amount of love

Adrian: Thank you he spoke as they parted a moment later I'll see you tomorrow.

Raven: He nodded confirming Have fun… I'll see you tomorrow and then he was gone.

Adrian: He sighed soft as Raven left and wondered if he'd ever be able to hold onto a partner more than 5 minutes, but thankfully his thoughts got interrupted as Dalton came back into the house

Dalton: He smiled soft and shy I washed myself a bit…

Adrian: He smiled warm and walked closer to Dalton, grabbing one of his hands, squeezing it lightly You didn't have to, I like you just the way you are

Dalton: He only became more shy from the compliment and somewhat ducked his head, though still facing Adrian I'm really nervous… why does this feel like first time? he chuckled nervously even my hands are trembling and my heart is pounding!

Adrian: I know he nodded lightly mine too.

Dalton: Really? he asked surprised you look so confident!

Adrian: He chuckled soft I'm not he leaned a little closer, wrapping his arms around Dalton, trying to calm the both of them, their hearts pounding nervously against each others, now they were chest against chest As long as you aren't scared… he spoke in a soft warm voice

Dalton: No. I'm not he answered soft and sighed to calm himself, though it didn't wormk much I trust you…… and I want you.

Adrian: He nodded lightly I definitely want you too!… it was never about that, just to be clear.

Dalton: Soft nod I know.

Adrian: He paused a short moment to gain courage and to not rush it all, before he spoke in a warm, inviting voice I made everything ready upstairs… should we take it up there instead?

Dalton: He nodded quick and gave Adrian a small squeeze before he let go, blushing lightly as he were once again facing the slightly Taller man. I would like that…

Adrian: Confirming nod Come with me he smiled soft and walked to the ladder, insisting Dalton climb it first

Dalton: As he reached the bedroom, he saw why. Adrian had arranged the room with candle light everywhere, not too many, just enough. The bed was dimmed in a yellow flickering candle light, and the room had a soothing warm earthy scent, undoubtedly one of the many candles, perhaps multiple? The sheets looked clean and the comforter even fluffier than usual. And on the bedside table were bottles of water and a tube of something Dalton assumed would be lube. He sighed with surprise and excitement from the view, and the fact that Adrian had went through the trouble This is fucking amazing! I'm not sure I deserve all this he chuckled as he turned to face Adrian but thank you.

Adrian: You deserve it all, and so much more he spoke low and warm, wrapping his arms back around Dalton, drawing him into a soft and tender, yet deep and longing kiss

Dalton: He moaned surprised and felt himself instantly melt in Adrian's arms

Adrian: He moaned soft and slowly started walking Dalton towards his bed, without force, without separating their lips, gently guiding, making sure Dalton wouldn't feel any pressure. As they reached Adrian's bed, he slowly started undressing Dalton, while their kissing slowly started heating up. Still nervous, a bit fumbling here and there, soft nervous chuckles in between, innocently searching, gentle moans of anticipation and pleasure. Dalton awkwardly assisting getting Adrian's clothes off. And as they were both standing naked on the floor, he slowly tilted them towards his bed, and they fell into it, light as feathers, still kissing and caressing each others bodies Are you okay? He asked after a good while of kissing and caressing

Dalton: He chuckled soft, by now having a permanent blush on his cheeks Yeah… I'm more than okay he nodded down himself, where his boner stood tall, hard and more than inviting

❌Short sex scene START - readers must be 18+❌ ❌ (To skip sex scene, scroll till next marking) ❌

Adrian: Mmmh he planted a couple soft kisses and nibbles on the side of Dalton's neck and grabbed his own boner, then leaned closer against Dalton, trapping Dalton's boner in the same hand, stroking the two of them together

Dalton: He sighed steamy air out and nodded soft Mmh-yeahh

Adrian: He found his way back to Dalton's lips, their kiss quickly heating up to a juicy French kiss

Dalton: A steamy moan escaped him, their tongues tied together in a kiss so full of love and desire, that he in this moment couldn't remember ever having been kissed like that before.

Adrian: His hands were still slightly trembling, but he knew what he was doing, as he slow and gentle started caressing Dalton's cheek with his free hand, wanting to grand him both pleasure and comfort at the same time.

Dalton: And it worked. He slowly felt himself melt into the mattress beneath him, his body heat rising and his skin tingling, begging to be touched by Adrian.

Adrian: I love you so much he whispered against Dalton's lips

Dalton: I love you too! he sighed eagerly

Adrian: I'm sorry I made you wait this long

Dalton: A soft moan escaping him It's alright… we are here now…

Adrian: He once again started kissing and nibbling his way down Dalton's neck, taking his time, adding a few licks here and there. Slow and soft, taking his time to taste Dalton and shower him with as much love as he deserved.

Dalton: Soft pants, moans, shivers, gasps and sighs, all rolled through him, and the further down his body Adrian came, the heavier his breathing became. His back arching every time it was extra good.

Adrian: He made his way down to the soft trail of hair, reaching from Dalton's pubic hair to right below his belly button. Planting soft kisses down the trail, licking it gently. Then slow but steady planting soft licks, nibbles and kisses round the root of his dick, and also his inner thighs as good as he could reach from his position

Dalton: His legs slowly started spreading, granting Adrian more space, hoping for him to lay between, his moans and sighs heating up as well as his body, a light dew forming on parts of his body.

Adrian: He took the invitation and swiftly crawled between Dalton's legs, fluttering his tongue over Dalton's thighs, nibbling and sucking the skin more eagerly now that he had more space. A searching finger trailing over Dalton's balls and up the shaft of his dick, gently circling the very tip as it found the tip already slippery from a bit of pre-cum.

Dalton: He moaned deep and longing at the fingers caressing and arched his back, longing to feel Adrian so much closer!

Adrian: He stretched lightly upwards and buried his face in Dalton's crotch, showering his balls with the most gentle kisses and licks Dalton had ever felt, gently sucking them one by one, before his tongue and lips started tracing the extra soft and delicate skin of Dalton's dick.

Dalton: Long sighing moan of pleasure, his arms and chest bathed in goose bumps. His fingers digging into the sheets below him, feeling at once electrified yet completely melted, as if all his muscles had turned to mush.

Adrian: He kept licking, nibbling and sucking lightly up and down Dalton's dick, taking his sweet time, before he once again returned to Dalton's balls, giving them another round of love and attention, before he slowly started moving further down.

Dalton: A surprised gasp escaped him as Adrian fluttered his tongue over Dalton's hole and he instantly grabbed Adrian's closest hand, squeezing it tight

Adrian: He right away lifted his head, looking at Dalton with a concerned frown Is it too much? he asked in a caring tone

Dalton: No he chuckled shyly it was weird… but…. good weird he smirked lightly and bit his bottom lip

Adrian: A warm smile spread on his lips, then he slowly lowered his head again, fluttering his tongue over Dalton's hole yet again

Dalton: He gasped again, this time a bit deeper, his eyes locking on the ceiling, a warm wave of pleasure rushing over him Mhh

Adrian: He leaned a little closer and started licking and kissing Dalton's hole more rapidly, but keeping it light and sweet, not wanting to overwhelm him and come on too strong.

Dalton: every lick and every kiss was so intense, a sweet tickly sensation spreading through his lower torso, his body slowly starting to twitch and squirm from the intense pleasure Adrian was providing him.

Adrian: The more Dalton squirmed the more eager his licks became and after few minutes, he reached out a hand, but unable to move he slowly lifted his head and looked at Dalton sorry, can you please pass me the lube?

Dalton: The lube? he looked at Adrian as if he barely knew what day it was

Adrian: He pointed towards the bedside table The tube

Dalton: Tube?… he turned his head slowly oh he quickly reached out and grabbed the tube, reaching the lube to Adrian

Adrian: Thank you he smiled soft and opened the tube, squirting a bit out into his hand

Dalton: What's the flavor? a brief memory of some cinnamon lube and Adrian's bed, fluttered through his mind

Adrian: He gently started rubbing it all over his fingers and leaned back in, smirking up at Dalton Nothing… I prefer to taste you. And without warning, he returned to eating Dalton, this time adding a couple fingers slowly massaging the surrounding aread.

Dalton: A louder more surprised moan escaped him as the pleasure of the massage rolled through him, making him arch his back, once again digging his fingers into the sheets, craving so much more of the deep intimacy and pleasure Adrian was serving.

Adrian: He moaned deep from the pleasure of seeing Dalton take it so well, and enjoy it, welcome it. His fingers more eagerly massaging the hole, determined to make the upcoming entry as smooth as possible. He sighed soft against Dalton's wet skin and allowed himself to fully enjoy the moment, both happy and relieved to see and hear Dalton's positive reactions.

Dalton: His breathing had turned much heavier by now, his dick lightly twitching, a strong orgasm rolling through his body, and then, out of the blue and without warning, he came with a surprised moan, lifting his head lightly, to see the cum run down his shaft, and just behind it, his eyes connected with Adrian's in an intense 5 seconds gaze, before he fell back down on the bed with a slightly louder moan, his body burning with desire he had never felt like this before! The intense and undeniable need to feel Adrian inside himself.

Adrian: He quickly reached up, swiping his finger slowly over the cum, catching it all, he smiled satisfied and licked about half up, then used the rest to gently rub on Dalton's hole, this time noticing he had definitely losened up and was ready, as the very tip of the finger started slipping in on it's own. So he took the chance, adding a bit of pressure and watched with hungry eyes, as his finger slowly slipped inside Dalton Mmhh

Dalton: Another surprised gasp escaping him and he once again grabbed for Adrian's free hand, as a bit of panic set in. Not a negative panic, but more the realisation that something was inside him. A finger. Adrian's finger. And it felt nothing less than amazing! A soft welcoming moan escaping him.

Adrian: He looked up at Dalton to try to read his body language, and although he wasn't looking at Adrian, it was easy to understand, that so far he was on board. So Adrian slowly wiggled his finger inside Dalton.

Dalton: Oh! His eyes instantly found their way to Adrian's, a slow nod indicating Adrian were welcome to continue. He bit his bottom lip and let a soft surrendering moan escape, his fingers slipping between Adrian's, a wish to share a deeper love, intimacy and connection.

Adrian: He moaned soft and squeezed Dalton's hand, and without any hesitation, slowly started gliding his finger in and out of Dalton.

Dalton: Mmmmhhh-fuuuckhh he arched his back again and whispered in a soft hoarse voice fuck that feels so good!

Adrian: He smiled satisfied between his licks and kept the finger slow fucking Dalton, keeping it light, yet determined, allowing it to slip all the way in, once in a while wiggling it a bit, every time he couldn't reach in further

Dalton: Ssshhittt he moaned deep and once again arching his back, a drop of sweat running down his temple

Adrian: After a minute he upped his speed a bit, hooking his finger upwards, making sure to reach some extra sensitive angles

Dalton: His moans were growing rapid by now, deep, sweat starting to form on his lower belly and chest, another drop running off his temple

Adrian: He turned his wrist, hooking his finger downwards again, once more touching spots Dalton had never even dreamed existed

Dalton: Louder, surprised moans mixed with a few chuckles from the intense pleasure escaped him fucking don't stop! he chuckled overwhelmed with sexual desire and pleasure

Adrian: He moaned soft from Dalton's words, and without much further thougt, slipped a second finger inside him, upping his speed a little, so he was now finger fucking Dalton at a much more steady speed and rhythm

Dalton: A long relieved moan, his back arching again, his body shivering from pleasure Yessss!!! Deep moan Adrianhhh!!

Adrian: He moaned deep from hearing Dalton moan his name, and upped the speed a little further, making it a bit more demanding

Dalton: Oh yeahhh!! He moaned hoarsely and squeezed Adrian's fingers with his hole, as if his body was trying to suck them further in.

Adrian: He noticed Dalton's body's eagerness and leaned upwards, starting to eat Dalton's balls greedy

Dalton: Long surprised moans escaped him, a light cough as his voice broke on a moan

Adrian: Soft moan, heart racing, unable to hold back much longer, the need and want to be with Dalton, growing more intense by the second

Dalton: And so did Dalton's want and need for Adrian, till it finally exploded into a loud roaring internal orgasm, leaving Dalton's body trembling and jerking from the intense pleasure, unlike anything he had ever felt before

Adrian: He slowed down his fingers and slipped them out of Dalton, slowly climbing on top of the boy, stroking Dalton's cheek gently Are you okay? he asked in a soft voice full of love and care

Dalton: Yes he chuckled lightly from the intense pleasure, still dominating his body more than okay! he looked at Adrian through drowsy eyes, and wrapped his arms around Adrian's neck, kissing his lips soft and loving

Adrian: He sighed soft from the pleasure and taste of Dalton's lips, then smiled gently as their lips parted, observing Dalton for a brief moment, trying to decide if he was done or could handle more?

Dalton: What? He chuckled shyly

Adrian: He shook his head lightly I was trying to detirmine if you're done or if you can handle more?

Dalton: He chuckled a bit more shy and leaned his head against Adrian's shoulder, hiding for a moment to gather courage to answer I uh…. still need to feel…. all of you…. please…. I really want you his lips gently brushing against Adrian's salty shoulder as he breathed the words out against his skin

Adrian: He sighed soft with pleasure of hearing those words, feeling Dalton's soft lips tell me if it becomes too much he leaned in, kissing Dalton's hair gently, then let a hand travel down between their sweaty bodies, gently grabbing his own dick, pushing it lightly against Dalton's hole.

Dalton: A soft, slightly worried moan escaped him, but before nerves could get the best of him, he already felt Adrian slowly glide inside Him Ooohhhhhhhh-nnnghhh

Adrian: He made sure only about half of him entered Dalton at first, gently stroking his cheeks as he raised his upper torso slightly, to gaze down at Dalton with loving eyes Are you alright? he asked in a warm, caring tone

Dalton: He nodded eagerly, tears gathering in his eyes I love you so much!

Adrian: A big happy natural smile instantly painted on his face I love you too! Very much in fact!

Dalton: He chuckled lightly as a few happy tears rolled down his temples and stretched upwards, to reach Adrian's lips, kissing them so tender, pouring all his love and emotions into their lips

Adrian: He moaned soft and kissed back with the same love and affection, lingering in their kiss for a moment, before he very slowly pushed the rest of him inside Dalton

Dalton: A deep surrendering moan escaping him as he both felt and realized all of Adrian had made it's way inside him. His stomach full of butterfly tornadoes, Adrian was inside him!!!!!! Another deep moan escaping him, feeling his dick twitch and leak some more cum, his breathing turning slow and heavy, feeling as if his body had turned into melted gooey butter

Adrian: He very slow and careful started moving inside Dalton, keeping it ultra light and sweet, only moving a tiny bit in and out each time, perhaps just the length of his tip. Trying his best not to overwhelm Dalton with his size.

Dalton: He nodded soft against their lips and let another more steamy moan out, shivering lightly as he let his arms travel from Adrian's neck, to his arms, digging his fingers into Adrian's upper arms, holding onto Adrian for safety and comfort, a somewhat squeak escaping him as his mind fully processed what was happening, and how amazing it felt, sending heat waves through his body.

Adrian: He sighed soft from pleasure against Dalton's lips and nibbled them lightly, feeling an intense heat gather between them, by now also noticing things turning more sticky between them, specifically Dalton's boner trapped between them. Undoubtedly he had cum again, just a bit, but enough to confirm Adrian that he could continue, so he very lightly upped the speed, just a smidge.

Dalton: Nnnnghhhhhaaaahhhh he panted lightly as he parted their lips, but rested his forehead against Adrian's. You're…. soft little pants of steamy pleasure you're amazing! he gasped lightly, his hole body starting to tremble again, feeling as if he was about to burst into a thousand shooting stars!

Adrian: He sighed soft with pleasure and planted a soft loving kiss on Dalton's lips so are you…. I'm so in love with you, Dalton.

Dalton: He sighed shakily and tightened his grip on Adrian's upper arms, whimpering soft I'm gonna!!!

Adrian: He nodded agreeing and pressed his lips tighter against Dalton's, a soft groan escaping him as he allowed himself to release and cum

Dalton: He gasped surprised from the unfamiliar feeling, his lips parting as soft surprised moan of relief and release escaped him, and he came with a heavy sigh of pleasure

Adrian: He moaned soft as he felt Dalton cum, and slowed down his movements, coming to a halt within few seconds, and stroke Dalton's cheeks soothingly, planting a handful butterfly kisses on Dalton's lips, before he with a couple shaky pants, parted their lips and looked at Dalton with a warm, loving gaze Are you alright? he asked in a loving voice, once again stroking Dalton's cheek

❌Short sex scene END - readers must be 18+❌ ❌ (Congrats, you successfully skipped sex) ❌

Dalton: He nodded confirming, a shy chuckle escaping him I am… much much more… than alright he chuckled between his panting, his heart running like a race horse are you kidding me? happy chuckling, his whole face lighting up, stars in his eyes, cheeks blushing bright

Adrian: Bursting out in a happy laughter, planting soft juicy kisses on Dalton's lips You're fucking magic!

Dalton: Happy laughing then you're a fucking wizard!!

They laid chuckling, kissing and caressing, till Adrian got fully soft and automatically slipped out of Dalton, and they ended up next to each other instead, Dalton snuggling in the nook of Adrian's arm, after they both drank a good amount of water

Dalton: He was gently caressing Adrian's chest, lost in observing his partner smoke a cigarette thank you.

Adrian: He turned his head, looking at Dalton with a loving gaze Thank YOU.

Dalton: He chuckled lightly and planted a soft kiss on Adrian's chest Kinda wanna smoke, but my whole body is like fucking jelly he snorted amused

Adrian: A soft smirk at the corners of his lips, as he reached out and held the cig towards Dalton's lips

Dalton: He lifted his head, taking a drag of the cig Thank you he chuckled lightly man I'm done! his head falling back down on Adrian's chest …. if I wasn't so tired….

Adrian: ….. if you weren't so tired… what?

Dalton: He managed to lift his head again, taking another drag of the cig I'm good, thanks!

Adrian: He returned the cig to his own lips, taking one last drag, before killing it in the ashtray next to him if you weren't so tired?

Dalton: He turned his head to look up at Adrian with a cheeky grin …. I'd ask for a second round, cause…. damn it was amazing!!!

Adrian: A wide grin spreading on his lips, then he leaned more towards Dalton's face, speaking in a low, aluring voice there's plenty where it came from….

Dalton: Mmhh he bit his bottom lip Kiss me

Adrian: He leaned in, kissing Dalton with warmth and passion, but keeping it on the softer side, no need to relight the fire right away when they were both more than spent. He stroke Dalton's cheek gently, then slowly parted the kiss, rolling to his side, so they now laid face to face. I'm glad you liked it

Dalton: He smiled soft and nodded I definitely did…. it was worth the wait! he chuckled lightly, then broke out in a yawn

Adrian: He chuckled soft, then yawned as well, wrapping an arm over Dalton's waist, gently stroking his back I love you, Dalton.

Dalton: Happy smile I love you too, Adrian.

They laid caressing each other for quite a while, before they eventually dozed off, happy, smiling, satisfied, and so full of love.

#unicorntales #Andycorn #Andy Shaw-Thompson #Dalton Red #Malou Jensen #Brandubh McKinney #Raven McKinney #Adrian Blackwood

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askwalmartniko · 8 months

Text

"info, rules, etc." — ooc 1

hello, and thank you so much for stopping by this blog. at first, i was inspired by the retailwatch overwatch rp blogs from years back, so i decided to make a semi-serious one with niko.

as much as this does follow a rather silly baseline with its plot, there are deeper themes that include major spoilers for the game's endings, with inspo with the freeware and remake vers. though, both interactions (in serious or lighthearted nature) are both welcomed.

i'll explain more under the cut, but my main acc is @burdening-light !

entry masterlist

updated concept art

characters you can ask thus far are niko, niko's mom (hazel), and niko's dad (ed)!

what is this blog about?

it details with niko's life as a 16-year-old. they work at walmart to support their family in the city while juggling their highschool courses and hobbies. i do not plan on drawing a whole lot, as i prefer to express more of my thoughts through writing.

what au is this?

this is set after the ending where niko breaks the lightbulb to return home. when they were 13, they moved to the city due to their father needing to stay there for better job proposals. they have repressed the memories of being "the messiah", but once as they start to age and understand more about the situation that they were in, it has affected them too much already.

what is the theme of this blog?

i say "semi-serious" because this is a silly idea, but taken seriously. i will shitpost here and there, but i am comfortable with elaborating on deeper themes such as trauma, coping mechanisms, and simply talking more about growing up while dealing with it all. i'm somewhat projecting onto niko here, but i want this to be someplace safe to discuss these topics.

however, i will do my best to tag these posts accordingly and provide proper trigger warnings if need be.

concept art i have of them so far is here. they go by they/them, as they are most comfortable with that set, and go to a public high school in a city. throughout their life, they seemed to repress their memories and never really seemed to stop and think about what happened back when they were just 8; as they were just so happy to see their family again.

now, with more time, it seemed to have made them think. fortunately enough for them, they are able to distract themselves, as they are part of an art club at the school and work at walmart as a stocker. they decided to make a social media account to really give them something else to do, in the meanwhile.

they are a big fan of drawing, and especially playing games; and can be rather competitive at times. they're into internet culture as well, but haven't interacted as much until now.

niko adores their mom very much, but hates how they seem to not have that much time to hang out. they make food for their neighbours in their apartment complex, but it just doesn't feel the same sometimes. niko's dad is out and about, but they're still on good times; it's just hard to communicate between the two.

other than that, they're leading a rather mediocre life. they are still optimistic and try to be real and grounded with it, since they were raised by their mom; no less. but, it still comes naturally for them to act with integrity, but it feels as if they are trying to prove something to themselves.

rules about asks/interactions

really, i'm fine with anything. as long as it is sfw, i'll do my best to respond. however, i am busy with things irl too, but i'll get to it as soon as possible.

if you want to address the owner, call me fruity or valérie, please!

tags:

#on the clock — 💡 = in-character (niko)

#— 🌾 (niko's mom/hazel) #— ⌨️ (niko's dad/ed)

#on break — 🥞 = ooc

#— ❕ = potential tw

#— 🧇 = silly/lighthearted post

#on break — 🥞#ooc #roleplay account #oneshot #oneshot game #oneshot niko #oneshot roleplay #asks open #ask walmart niko #walmart niko #oneshot rp #oneshot au

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jadelynlace · 2 years

Note

hiii hope you’re having a great day/night.

i wanted to ask what was Aidens reaction to hearing about Ivars car crash and what did he do after (you don’t have to answer)

Hello, anon!

So, if I remember correctly as I was pummeled to death by ideas about this AU; I believe I created Aiden after I had written the original plot line of what became chapter five. So, I never really thought about his take on the accident. Originally, I planned to have you/the reader meet him when Ivar was in physical therapy, but with how close those two characters developed to be, it just didn't seem like Ivar to not introduce you to his best friend. Aiden is basically his 6th brother.

Also, another thing I don't know if I ever mentioned specifically (I know I have reblogged images?), but Ivar's car was a 1967 Mustang Fastback. That piece of information will be relevant in a moment.

Here's what I have gathered. There is a content warning for potentially triggering topics; medical terminology, care crashes, hospitals (basically everything that pertains to this plot line):

I do think initially when you call Aiden, he doesn't answer; he's at work and busy with a client. You're already a mess; a few hours into Ivar's 16-hour surgery and Floki and Aslaug have just arrived. This isn't the time to leave a voicemail, because it would mostly be a blubbering mess as you try to navigate the horror you just worked through. Finally, about an hour later you see his name pop up on your phone and you don't even get past the first ring before you answer.

"Hello! How's Ivar's future wife today?" Aiden asks with a cheery voice. He has always said something of that nature when you two speak, and God if that doesn't just completely gut you on the tile floor.

"Aiden..." You try because words aren't coming all of a sudden and your voice is laden with a cry and he freezes. The first thought is that you two broke up and he wants to kick himself. To him, that's likely the worst thing you can say to him.

"Ivar...Ivar crashed his car,"

That's definitely worse.

"He's in surgery right now...they don't know if he's going to make it,"

He wasn't even close.

"I'll be there as soon as I can," Aiden replies as he goes completely numb.

"Aiden, you don't...I was...and Hvitty..." And you have to stop for a moment as crying takes over most of the other line.

"You responded to the call, didn't you?" Aiden asks but he already knows the answer. "Then you know he's going to live, Y/N. Between you and Hvitserk, you know he's going to live," And all he hears is you cry before the phone shifts into Aslaug's hands.

"He would want you here too, dear," She says and Aiden still wants to know how this woman has the ability to remain so calm and soft-spoken when her baby boy is on the operating table. "I'll pay for your ticket, and I'm sure the hospital will set up another cot for you. If not there's a hotel not too far from the hospital..."

"Aslaug, you don't have to," Aiden tries.

"I know I don't. But Ivar deserves to have everyone here, and that includes you. This is going to be tough for everyone, at least we can try to make it easier for him," She answers.

"What happened?" Aiden finally finds the courage to ask.

"You know how he drives, Aiden," Aslaug answers. "He lost control and hit a semi-truck head-on," And she hears Aiden hiss. "Y/N says his legs were only attached by the skin on the back of his knees,"

"Oh my god. I told him that mustang wouldn't be safe; he needed a car that's not a fucking antique,"

"It wouldn't have made a difference, Aiden. He was wearing it like a blanket when she got there,"

"I'll let you know when I get to the airport," Aiden finally says.

The call ends there and he leaves the shop as quickly as he can. He doesn't even bother with his car; the metro is faster and will take him right to the airport if he switches at the right station. Hundreds of thoughts go through his head as he tries to map out what he needs and it occurs to him that he can get everything when he lands. And it's not like Ivar's going to be wearing his clothes for a while anyway.

Aiden looks at his phone right as he gets service, still sitting on the runway as the engines on the plane die down. Your name pops up immediately through a text message and he doesn't even realize he's shaking as his thumb taps the notification.

It's a picture of Ivar in the cot, from the view of where you're sitting as you watch in the waiting room while they monitor the post-surgery replantation. He's wearing the tubes, the wires, covered in scratches from bent metal and flying glass, sporting contusions that look like makeup. He almost can't believe that it's Ivar. His Ivar. Your Ivar. And he's laying perfectly flat on his back and Aiden's first thought is how Ivar hates to lay like that.

"He's going to live," Is all your message reads before Aiden stands.

#vikings #vikings fiction #vikings au #modern vikings #modern vikings au #ivar au #ivar #modern ivar #modern ivar au #ivar x you #ivar x reader #modern ivar x you #modern ivar x reader #— i am i am i am. ( my writings & creations )

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nightswithkookmin · 3 years

Note

Hello there😊, wanna ask you a question that is roaming in my head!! and raising my anxiety. These days, we are only getting the videos and the photos that Hybe/BH wants to show us. Most of these are edited but sometimes I feel that something is wrong with Jimin(don't get me wrong). Like it's always JK who is showing much affection to Jimin but JM became kinda quite in Jikook. What do you think about it? Does Jimin want a break from their relationship or it's just because he doesn't want to show us the truth? ?

It's just my thoughts and these thoughts are giving me stress!! I love them so much🥺that's why I'm tensed.

Lolololololololololol

I agree with a lot of your observations here but do you really think JK acts like a happy bunny these days in his Fantasia side swoop strutting all over the place like a 1955 gay man because he thinks his boyfriend is about to break up with him???

Jimin is a bit introverted in my opinion and if you aren't used to seeing that side of him you might think something is off with him or that he is sad or angry or this or that every now and then.

Anything could be inducing his moods- including but not limited to his relationship with JK. Personally I don't think JK is the one leaning forward in their relationship this time around. It's Jimin.

Similar to how Jungkook is not always introverted. We could be reading that as him leaning forward in their dynamic if we not careful. As I've said a couple of times in my blogs no one is a 100% anything. We are all introverted to a degree or extroverted to a degree and sometimes with Jikook that plays out in their dynamic.

When you say lately it's always JK showing much affection to Jimin- I love it but

Don't let the PJMs catch you chilee. They finna jump you. Lmho.

JK does show love and affection to JM. That's a fact. Jikook is not a one sided relationship. So thank you for at least seeing that.

If you feel there's something off with Jimin then JK taking care of him and showing much affection to him should be the appropriate response. No? There is nothing wrong with him taking the lead and catering to JM especially since Jimin often gets berated and attacked when he does the catering to in their dynamic.

Let's normalize Jikook loving eachother.

Personally I don't think JK is the one leaning forward in their relationship. In spite of the introverted phase he is in, I think Jimin is the one piloting things this season post the October era. I mean it's pretty much obvious.

Jimin has been on his Jikook agenda for a hot minute now. Why do you think antis are mad?

Not to be that person, but I think I pretty much theorized when 'October' was happening that whoever was 'at fault' was gonna come swinging hard on their Jikook agenda when that phase was over. We are in the post October phase. Do the maths.

And I know a lot of people have been mad at Jk for acting 'cold' and and aloof, 'uncomfortable' blah blah blah but I just think he is just chill and laid back. He put the ball in Jimin's court and it's up to him to decide what they do and how they interact especially with their glass closet now and I think that's been weighing on him too. I'll talk more about this in the Minimoni post. Sigh.

For Jimin, he's gone through a phase of reevaluation and reassessment since October. He bought a second house. He's talked about cutting off friends, trying to find his voice or try new styles- something deep and melancholic, listening to emotional songs, working out, trying to build muscles etc.

There's a lot happening around him too. For one his members keep churning music in a language he is barely conversant in. That can be challenging especially for someone like him who doesn't like to do things half assed.

He is taking on new challenges- don't know how well he is or was mentally prepared for it. For someone like Tae and Jk who had already dabbled in English Albums and singles I think they are pretty much happy about the direction the band is headed in and were very much prepared to take on this challenge.

I think they are all challenging themselves as a group in this era.

I'm not sure how he feels about the others constantly talking about that they are old and can't do this and can't do that- Jimim is 25. I don't think he is that old. He loves his youth and loves to celebrate it and make the most of it. Young forever.

I can imagine the toll it might take on him to constantly hear that he is old and can't do this or that by his members and netizens.

He loves the stage. Loves to dance. I mean look at how hard he went with his dance in the PTD MV. Hopefully in 2022 things can go back to normal.

Bangtan went from we are getting old to we are fossils in 0.2 seconds it gives me whiplash.

What I'm saying is, there is a lot going on in his personal and professional life as well as his social life. All of that could be contributing to his mood lately.

As to whether he wants a break from his relationship I think he is the best person to answer that.

People who don't know what they want or who subconsciously want to end their relationships often self sabotage their relationships in their waking life. Sometimes too they are just insecure and immature and don't know how to keep the things they want and end up sabotaging themselves. I do think JM went through phases like that in the past- you know which eras I'm talking about.

But I do think he is in the drivers seat now and the ball is in his court to decide whatever he wants from their relationship and how he wants to work it.

I think Kook is equally in a place where he would be ok with whatever Jimin decides- granted he would shed a few tears and write sad songs if Jimin decides to break up with him. He and Taylor Swift about to be Bffs. Lol.

Wow, my chest hurts. Sweet baby Jesus bind Jikook together with some Gorilla glue cos I can't if they break up for good😭😭😭

If Jimin wants Jk to be doing the flowers and the trips and the birthday posts and the songs, and the coded tweets and Weverse posts, I think he would gladly do it.

I don't think Jk is afraid to speak Jimin's love language. If Jimin doesn't want him, his loss.

Please I'm hurting. I don't like that😫😫😫

Jk can be a lot. He can be intense and yes I do think that used to overwhelm Jimin sometimes especially when he was constantly lowkey high key borderline outing their relationship left right left every chance he got💀

But dude is repented😒

Like I said, I think he's been pretty much laid back and chill for a while now. Nothing intense and 'problematic.' You can tell he's been going out of his way to not fuck things up for his own sanity, the group's and especially JM's sakes. Why then would Jimin want a break from him🤺

FREE JK.

This don't look like someone who wants a break anywhere to me but I guess time will tell. You just never know with Jimin.

You let this man tattoo your initials on his ring finger scaring off potential suitors only for you to turn around and dump him that's just wickedness🙁

You have this man wrapped around your finger jumping through hoops literally for you what more do you want him to do???? He better not start his shenanigans. He is getting wedded to that man whether he likes it or not. They are doing the whole church and traditional wedding thingy I swear to God🤺

Do I have to remind him he promised to go to the Moon with JK? Sir don't trigger me this early morning.

I'm finna channel my inner tuktukker on him and drag him to the alter kicking and screaming. Jungkook deserves his happily ever after too. It's 2021. They both better leave that ghetto shit behind. I knew I should have ordered that Gorilla glue. The fuck!

GOLDY

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twopoppies · 4 years

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hi!! i looked in your fic rec MP and i didn't see it, so i thought I'd ask. i read In Vogue recently and LOVED it and then I've been binging project runway episodes (bc why not) and now I'm craving good fashion fics. maybe even a project runway one. have you read any good ones? and could you maybe rec some?

Hi sweetheart. Ohhh, I love that fic. And yes, I’ve got a few that have to do with fashion.

In Vogue by otpwhatever / @thecelineharry (M, 121K) This one is just….so much. The intensity of the characters, the crazy hot smut (oh god, the window scene), the FASHION, the angst (I had to take a walk around the block after reading it), the epic love story between two men who could rule the world if they could just figure their shit out. The fic has been deleted, but the link is to a download.

These Constant Stars by stylinsoncity (M, 31K) This author has written so many great fics and this one is really lovely. I also always like when one of the boys is not what he seems to be on first glance. There’s also a second part, told from Harry’s POV.

Three French Hems by 100percentsassy, gloria_andrews (M, 20K) the characterizations and set up for this fic are sharp and funny, making this a really fun read. Plus there’s a lot of talk of Louis worshipping Harry’s thighs. LOL!

Fading by tothemoonmydear (M, 202K) Let me start by asking you to please read the tags on this one. It’s a very well-written fic, but it deals very graphically with Louis’ character’s eating disorder. At the time it was written some people felt it did not portray ED recovery accurately, so if the subject is at all triggering for you, please don’t read this one. Of that’s not an issue for you, make sure you have tissues ready because I ugly cried through almost all of this. I read it years ago and loved it at the time, but it’s not one I could handle reading twice.

sweet, where you lay by @infinitelymint (E, 27K) I read this ages ago and my notes only say that it was “sweet and sexy”, which is not terribly helpful. But this author is a good one, in general, so I feel safe including it here.

The rest of these were suggested by @cuethetommo who generally likes the same sort of fics I do. I either haven’t read these, or don’t remember enough about them to have an opinion! 😆 But I trust her.

Put It All On Me by LoadedGunn (M, 15K)

"Yeah, yeah, give it to me, that's it, spread your legs a bit, there you go."

The camera follows Louis as he does. Maybe if the modelling thing doesn't work out, he could try the porn industry. Then again, he's a bit too stocky to be twinky and a bit too twinky to be anything else. He likes that about himself, though. Well, directors and photographers like that about him. He could pull off pretty and edgy, could do GQ in the morning and a perfume commercial in the afternoon. Right now he thinks he could pull off anything, because it's Harry fucking Styles directing him.

Or, a Top Model AU where Louis is accidentally there to make friends, not become Britain's Next Top Model. (Also Zayn is the supermodel host.)

you pull me in by yoursongonmyheart (NR, 7K)

“Did you really wear silk jammies to meet him?” Fizzy is almost in tears.

He’s going to kill them.

He’s really going to kill them.

Ernie throws his backpack on the floor before telling Fizzy, quite loudly, “Mr. Styles looked at Achoo like this” and making an exaggerated jaw dropped face.

“That is not what happened!” Louis protests.

“And Achoo looked at Mr. Styles like that, too!” Doris pulls the same face before laughing.

------

//or the one where Louis is a model, Harry teaches Doris and Ernie at primary and now might be a good time to fall in love.

This Road Leads Where Your Heart Is by LittleLostPieces (E, 15K)

Alright, so Louis has a bit of a type is the thing. And as fit as his supermodel flatmate (Harry) may be, he isn't what Louis is looking for in a potential partner. That’s all. He’s not Louis’ type, with his miles of lanky limbs and his bright, boyish eyes. His impossibly tight, little body and infectious laughter are not what Louis wants. They're not. Really.

swimming in a champagne sea by delsicle (E, 17K)

Louis is a supermodel. Harry is a celebrity photographer known for capturing the brightest up and comers in their most candid moments. They meet at London’s most exclusive New Year’s Eve party.

An alpha/alpha fic filled with confusion, banter, Ubers, and glitter

Life at Shutter Speed by zarah5 (E, 20K)

AU. Having landed a job modelling for an outdoor clothing catalogue, Harry certainly wouldn’t mind doing some extracurricular work for photographer Louis Tomlinson. Say, a private photo session? Yes, please? Good thing that Harry has ten days and three beautiful locations -- Morocco, Indonesia and the Swiss Alps -- to make Louis see just how good they could be.

Special Topping by LoadedGunn (E, 20K)

'Who would even want so many pizzas so late at night?' Harry wonders before the door opens.

Oh. Apparently short guys with shaggy brown hair and a scruff and bright blue eyes and heart-stopping smiles. That's who.

Harry's not even ashamed of how he nearly drops all the pizzas. This guy is gorgeous and Harry hasn't noticed anyone like that in ages, let alone provided services to them. If he opened his mouth right now the only thing that would come out is, "By special topping did you mean my dick?"

Or, the AU where Harry delivers pizza and Louis really just wants Tim Gunn to spank him.

everywhere (i want to be with you) by itiswhatisbutterfly (E, 42K)

Harry and Louis meet because they have terrible friends, they fall in love because something feels right in a world of uncertainty and shifting grounds. Louis is an actor and Harry is a model at the top of his game, the best things in life are the most unexpected ones and the things that hit you when you are least expecting it.

Featuring winter in London, nights in Paris, early mornings in New York, burning heat in Monte Carlo and an enduring love spent transcending four corners of the globe.

Young Gods by sincewewereeighteen (E, 77K)

“Why don’t you stay?” Harry looked down at him and snorted. “What?”

“You’re not my type, Louis”, the boy rolled his eyes sitting on the edge of the bed to put on his boots.

“Says the man you just had sex with”, Louis pointed feeling smart, but Harry was one step ahead of him, with the answer on the tip of his tongue.

“You see, if you were my type, I wouldn’t have”, Harry winked, cheeky as hell. “I would’ve gotten to know you first.”

“Bullshit”, he accused the boy not letting it show how intrigued he was. “How can you know I’m not your type if you don’t know me?”

“How about I list five things about you to prove I’m right and if any of them are false I’ll lie down again.”

“Ok. Go.”

[Or: the one in which Louis is a model and Harry's supposed to be a normal guy... Until he isn't.]

#fashion fics #my fic rec #Larry fic rec

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darkficsyouneveraskedfor · 2 years

Text

Unexpected 19

Sequel to Unsolicited

Warnings: non/dubcon, pregnancy, car sex, Lloyd being the worst, and other dark elements. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.

My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.

As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. I’m happy to once more go on this adventure with all of you! Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging.

You nestle down on the couch. The house is quiet and dark, only the low glare of the television lighting the front room as you listen to the drone of your favourite Drew Barrymore movie. A shiver rolls through you as you recall the last night you spent in this house, the one that ended in the wet grass.

You still don't know what you were thinking and yet the temptation lingers. You're listless, still lost in the sea of Lloyd's making.

You keep a pillow between your legs to ease the pain in your hips. Ever constant but more obvious with the growing weight of your stomach. You fear one bad night might have you once again bedbound. As if pregnancy isn't uncomfortable enough. You already feel helpless, even without a fetus sucking the life from you.

You rest your hand on your belly and bend your arm under your head. You and Colin never wanted a kid. You liked it just the two of you. You did. Apparently it wasn't enough for him. You sigh away the thought. You shouldn't think about him so much but a whole decade can't just fade away in the bat of an eye. Even Lloyd's.

"So, you're not comin' to bed," he frightens you as he shadow looms behind the couch, hands on the back as he bends slightly over you.

"Yours? No," you answer bluntly, recentering your vision on the television.

He huffs, "I know you're mad but--"

"I'm restless. I can't sleep because the baby..." you retort, "the baby you cursed me with."

"The baby you don't give a fuck about, apparently. Your self-preservation is not your strongest suit, you know?"

He crosses his arms over the back of the couch as he stoops lower. You sniff and let it out slow. You could strangle him, slap him, spit in his face. It's always your fault, he can do no wrong. You didn't ask for any of this. He knows that. If anything, he basks in that fact.

He hums, "it's cold upstairs. And this couch isn't the best for sleeping."

"Are you tryna be a good guy? Too late for that."

"I'm trying to make it up to you--"

You snarl and push yourself up, an awkwardly struggle to roll onto your back that undermines the anger within.

You sneer up at him, "make what up? That you humiliated me? Drag me around the mall and flirt with young girls in front of me? You're the same fucking pervert I met in the shop. Actually, you've proven yourself a lot worse," you snap. "Oh or are you sorry for shoving your dick down my throat until I gagged? You never seemed to mind that before. Wait, wait, I keep forgetting, I said his name. Wow, my god, fuck me for wanting to feel something. Anything!"

You swing your legs over the side of the couch and stand with a grunt, bracing your lower back, "leave me the fuck alone, Lloyd. Mommy's got you presentable but you can't fool me."

"Look, we were both wrong. But you didn't need to try to off yourself. You're not a weak bitch. I know that--"

"Oh, you think that's a compliment," you stomp away. "You'll have to try harder, if you ever try hard at anything besides being a fucking prick."

"Nah, that comes naturally," he follows you into the kitchen. You distract yourself with the fridge as you open it to search for a snack, "you should stay away from too much sugar--"

"Don't you even dare right now," you bark as you let the door shut and roll open the freezer drawer, "ah, here we go."

You take out the tub of rocky road and plop it on the counter. You fish out a spoon and peel off the lid. You stab the spoon into the frozen cylinder and dig away at it impatiently.

"I said sorry--"

"Because mommy told you," you scrape away a spoonful, "I don't fucking buy it, Lloyd. I know you. A little better than I want to."

"Uh, yeah, we are married so--"

"Don't remind me," you shove the spoon in your mouth and lick it clean, "it's a walking nightmare. Not like I don't have enough of the normal kind. Every time I close my eyes, I see your stupid fucking mustache and hear your dumb fucking voice--"

"I'm flattered."

"Of course you are. You're ego can't process what I'm saying," you jab the spoon down again, frustrated as you try to get past the hard surface to a chunk of chocolate.

He's quiet as he watches you. He moves closer, hand dragging across the counter. You focus on fighting the icy quart.

"I was tryna make you jealous. Those girls aren't my type, you know that."

"Not making it better," you growl and turn on him, raising the spoon, "get away from me before I scoop your eye out."

"I'd like to see you try, sweet cheeks," he laughs, "come on, I'm pouring out my heart here, peaches. I only want you, you know that."

"You're an idiot."

He inhales and turns, reaching up to the cupboard and opening the door. He takes out a bowl then slides out the drawer, grabbing the scoop. He runs it under warm water and grabs the tub of ice cream, carving out several balls of rocky road and putting it before you.

"There."

"I don't need your help."

"You need me, whether you want to accept it or not," he insists, "and," he turns to lean on the counter and crosses his arms, dipping his chin down, "indoo."

"Indoo? What gibberish--"

"I need you," he throws a hand up as he raises his head, "okay? Got it?"

You look at him as you spoon up the ice cream. You take a long taste as you consider his avoidant posture. He refuses to even glance in your direction.

"You don't get to just take everything. You, the baby," he talks with his hand, but not to you, "I don't get to find you dead on the lawn. That's not how this works."

"I know exactly how it works, Lloyd, why do you think I went out there?"

"Because you're stubborn as fuck," he snorts, "and that's exactly why I like you, peaches."

You send the sudden movement and you turn, deflecting his hand away from your ass. You tut and point the spoon at him, "ice cream and humble pie isn't gonna wipe the slate clean."

"Can you acknowledge that I'm trying?"

"I can acknowledge that you gave me a snack," you take the bowl and prance away.

"Not gonna return the favour, though, huh?" He trails after you.

"You try to touch me again, and I'll bite something off," you flop onto the couch, "go back to bed, give me some space. That's what you can do for me."

He looms and lets out another heavy breath, "are you gonna come to bed? Eventually?"

You don't look at him, opting instead to stare at the carnival scene playing out on television, "dunno."

He's quiet as he shifts on his feet, "I love this movie, you know? Had a big thing for Drew--"

"Go away," you say sharply, "or did you want me to go sleep in the yard?"

"Fine, fine," he raises his hands, "but... I'm just putting it out there that I changed the sheets and it's all nice and cozy and soft for you. I even freshened up my stache--"

"I'm going to throw this at you in ten seconds," you snarl, "and I'm not gonna be happy about the wasted ice cream."

"Sorry, mistress," he says coyly as he steps back on his heel, "whenever you're ready to spank me--"

You chuck the spoon in his direction and he dodges with a cackle. You shake your head as he quickly retreats.

"I'll be waiting with cheeks ready," he tosses back with another snicker.

"Fucking idiot," you growl as you put the bowl down, droplets of ice cream across your shirt from the angry hurl.

You shake your head as you listen to him go. How the fuck does he always wriggle his way out of these things? Well, you're not gonna let him off that easy.

#unexpected #lloyd hansen x reader #dark lloyd hansen #lloyd hansen #dark!lloyd hansen #drabble #dark drabble #series #dark!drabble #the gray man

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lee-scribbles-and-doodles · 4 years

Text

My Top Ten Overlooked Movies With Female Leads In No Particular Order

Note: When you see this emoji (⚠️) I will be talking about things people may find triggering, which are spoilery more often then not. I mention things that I think may count as triggers so that people with them will be aware before going in to watch any of these.

Edited: 3/16/21

Hanna (2011)

So, before I get into why you should watch this movie, I just want to take a moment to say why it's near and dear to my heart. Growing up as a queer kid in the early 2000s, seeing portrayals of people like or similar to myself on anything was rare at best. It was mostly in more "adult" movies or shows that my parents would occasionally let me watch with them that I'd see any lgbtq+ rep at all. Often times they were either walking stereotypes, designed to be buried, evil, or all three.

Then here comes this PG-13 action thriller with a wonderfully written main female lead who, at the time, was close to my age, and who got to kiss another girl (her very first friend, Sophie) on screen in an extremely tender and heartwarming scene. To say the least, it was a life changing moment for me personally.

Now that I've gotten that out of the way, Hanna is a suspenseful movie about a child super-soldier named, you guessed it, Hanna (played by Saoirse Ronan) and her adoptive (?) father Erik Heller (played by Eric Bana) exiting the snowy and isolated wilderness of their home and taking on the shadowy CIA operative, Marissa Wiegler (played by Cate Blanchette) who wants Erik dead and Hanna for herself for mysterious reasons.

It also has an amazing soundtrack by the Chemical Brothers, great action scenes, and it has an over arching fairytale motif, which I'm always a sucker for.

⚠️ Mild blood effects, some painful looking strikes, various character deaths, and child endangerment all feature in this film. However, given its PG-13 rating, a majority of viewers are presumably able to handle this one. Still, be aware of these going in.

Sidenote: It's recently gotten a TV adaptation on Amazon TV, although I have not watched it, and do not know if Hanna and Sophie's romantic/semi-romantic relationship has transferred over.

A Simple Favor

A Simple Favor is a "black-comedy mystery thriller" centered entirely around the relationship between two mothers, the reclusive, rich, mysterious, and regal Emily (played by Blake Lively), and the local recently widowed but plucky mommy blogger, Stephanie (played by Anna Kendrick). When Emily suddenly goes missing, Stephanie takes it upon herself to find out what happened to her new best friend.

It's a fantastic and entertaining movie throughout, with fun, flawed and interesting characters. The relationship between the two female leads is also implied to be at least somewhat romantic in nature, and they even share a kiss.

⚠️ The only major warnings I can think of is that the movie contains an instance of incest and one of the main plotlines revolves around child abuse, although both of these potentially triggering topics are not connected to each other, so there is thankfully no csa going on.

Edit: I legitimately forgot there was drug use in this movie until now. So, yeah, if that's a trigger, be careful of that.

I Am Mother

I became mildly obsessed with this movie when it came out. I Am Mother is a sci-fi film that centers entirely around a cast of two woman, and a female-adjacent robot who is brought to life on screen with absolutely amazing practical effects.

The plot is such, after an extinction-level event, a lone robot known only as Mother tasks herself with replenishing the human race via artifical means. She begins with the film's main protagonist, Daughter. Years go by as Mother raises her human child and the two prepare for Daughter's first sibling (a brother) to be born. However, on Daughter's 16th birthday, the arrival of an outsider known only as Woman shakes Daughter's entire world view. She begins to question Mother's very nature, as well as what's really going on outside the bunker she and her caretaker call home.

⚠️ This movie features child endangerment and reference to child death.

Lilo and Stitch

When I decided to add a single Disney film to this list I initially thought it was going to be hard but almost immediately my brain went to Lilo and Stitch, and specifically about the relationship between Lilo and Nani.

On the surface, this film is about a lonely little girl accidentally adopting a fugitive alien creature as a "dog," but underneath that the story is also about two orphaned sisters and the older sister's attempts to not let social services tear them apart by stepping up as the younger sister's primary guardian. Despite its seemingly goofy premise, Lilo and Stitch has a very emotional and thoughtful center. It's little wonder how this movie managed to spawn an entire franchise.

Despite the franchise it spawned (or possibly because of it), I often find that Lilo and Stitch is overlooked and many people only remember it for the "little girl adopts an alien as a pet" portion of its plot, and I very rarely see it on people's top 10 Disney lists.

⚠️ This movie could be potentially triggering to people who were separated from their siblings or other family members due to social service intervention. There's also a bit of child endangerment, including a scene where Lilo and Stitch both almost drown.

Nausicaä and the Valley of the Wind

Unlike the above entry, I did struggle a little bit with picking a single Studio Ghibli film. Most media of the Ghibli catalogue have strong, well-written, unique, and interesting female leads so selecting just one seemed like quite the task.

However, I eventually settled on this particular film. In recent months, Princess Nausicaä has become my absolute favorite Ghibli protagonist and I'm absolutely enchanted by the world she lives in.

Set in a post-apocalyptic world overun by giant insects and under threat of a toxic forest and its poisoness spores, Nausicaä must try to protect the Valley of the Wind from invaders as she also tries to understand the science behind the toxic forest and attempts to bridge the gap between the insects and the humans.

For those who have never seen the film, I think Nausicaä's personality can best be described as being similar to OT Luke Skywalker. Both are caring, compassionate, and gentle souls who are able to see the best in nearly anyone or anything. She's an absolutely enthralling protagonist and after rewatching the film again for the first time in well over a decade she has easily become one of my all time favorite protagonists.

Whenever I see people talk about Ghibli films, they rarely mention this one, and when they do mention it, it's often in passing. In my opinion it's a must watch.

⚠️ This movie contains some blood, and the folks who either don't like insects or who have entomophobia may not appreciate the giant bugs running about throughout the movie. (Although most insects do not directly relate to real life bugs, and are fantasy creatures).

A Silent Voice

A Silent Voice is an animated movie adaptation of a manga of the same name. While I've never had the pleasure to read the manga, the movie is phenomenal. It covers topics such a bullying, living in the world with a disability, the desire for atonement, social anxiety, and depression in a well thought out manner that ties itself together through the progression of the relationship between its two leads, Shoya and Shouko. It's also beautifully animated. Although very popular among anime viewers, I've noticed that it's often overlooked by people who watch little to no anime. So I suppose this is me urging non-anime viewers to give this film a chance.

⚠️ As mentioned above, the movie deals with bullying, anxiety, and depression (with this last one including suicidal thoughts and behaviour). If discussion of those topics are triggering to you, than you may want to proceed with caution or skip this movie all together.

In This Corner of The World

Another manga adaptation, this one taking place during WWII-era Japan. In This Corner of The World follows the life of a civilian Japanese woman, Suzu Urano, as she navigates simply living and her new marriage as the wartime invades nearly all aspects of everyday life. I think this movie is a good representation of what it must be like to be living as civilian in a country at war where the fight is sometimes fought on one's own soil. It was also an interesting look into pre-50s Japanese culture in my opinion. It's also beautifully animated featuring an art style I don't see often.

Despite it being well known among anime fans, I never really see it be brought up, even among said anime fans themselves.

Side note: I've seen many WWII dramas centering around civilians but they've almost always been about American or UK civilians. This was the first movie I'd seen that features the perspective of a Japanese civilain.

⚠️ Features the death of a child and limb loss. There's also a disturbing scene featuring a victim of one of the atomic bombs near the end.

Wolf Children: Ame and Yuki

This film follows Hana, a Japan-native woman who fell in love with a magical shape-shifting wolf-man, and her trials with raising their children, who can also magically shape-shift into wolves, on her own. It's a very heartfelt movie about a mother's love and the struggles of doing right by your children when you have limited resources to actively guide and care for them. All the characters feel unique and alive in my opinion. Also, the animation is so good that my sister and I initially mistook it for a Ghibli film.

Again, like the previous two anime entries, I don't see it ever brought up outside of anime circles.

⚠️ There's some child endangerment present in the film, although none of it is the fault of Hana as far as I can remember.

Roman Holiday

Roman Holiday is about the fictional Princess Ann (played by Audrey Hepburn), who while on a whirlwind tour of Europe, finally reaches her breaking point over having her entire life be one big schedule and all her words and actions being rehearsed. In the spur of the moment, she runs away in hopes of experiencing what life is like for other women. Unfortunately, she was previously given a sedative, meaning she doesn't get too far before it takes effect. Fortunately, she is found by the kind reporter Joe Bradley (played by Gregory Peck). Believing her to be drunk and unable to get an address from her (because she has none) he ends up taking her home for safety's sake and allows her to sleep off her suppose drunken stupor. The next day, he realizes who she is, and decides to take her on a fun sight seeing trip across Rome in hopes of getting the big scoop. Along the way, they begin to fall for each other.

This is my favorite black and white, old romance film. I think the relationship between the main characters is absolutely beautiful and I have a lot of fun watching it.

⚠️ I'm not entirely sure what kind of warning this film would need. However, it was released in 1953, so values dissonance will probably be at play for many viewers to at least some extent. For example, early in the film Ann is given sedation drugs by her doctor for her behavior, something that is very unlikely to happen today. Also, Mr Bradley deciding to take Ann home to keep her safe rather than call the police or an ambulance is a very pre-90s decision in my opinion.

#hanna 2011 #a simple favor #i am mother #lilo and stitch #nausicaä of the valley of the wind #a silent voice #in this corner of the world #wolf chilren ame and yuki #wolf children #roman holiday #black and white film #anime #disney #studio ghibli #movie recs #top 10

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confessionsofa-roleplayer · 3 years

Note

Hey! I need some advice on how to handle RPs with OCs that display toxic behavior. Said toxic behavior is mildly triggering. How do I bring it up without sounding like an ass? How do I stop fearing backlash for saying something? How do I leave without it looking rude?

Well, Anon, without knowing what that behavior is, it's harder to give you solid advice. But that's totally okay. I understand that offering too much information can lead to potential identification, which isn’t what we want here. So, I'll do my best to respond to you in a general sense.

First - I would hope any unwanted partner behavior (especially if it's a potential trigger for you) is something you've already addressed in your rules/guidelines. If that's the case, then I don't think you'd 'sound like an ass' if you messaged them and just said, "Hey, so I've noticed you doing {list their behavior here} in our thread, and it's in my rules that that's not okay. I enjoy writing with you, but for my own comfort, I won’t be able to continue our thread if you continue to do this." You can also tell them you'll block or soft block them, too. But since you're wanting to avoid looking like the 'bad guy' I think I would only use those measures if they become necessary.

If, for some reason, this unwanted behavior isn't in your rules/guidelines, then you should add it. Once your rules are edited you can post on your dash about updated rules (maybe @ing all of your current partners?) and ask everyone to look it over. I would probably phrase it a bit like this, "I recently realized that some things I thought were already included in my guidelines weren't. I've made some additions and edits and would like everyone to give them a look as soon as you can. Thank you so much!" This would be a good time to do any additional rule revamps and edits so that it looks less like you're targeting this one specific thing this mun is doing.

In regards to your last question about leaving without looking rude, I think the only way to do that is to try talking to this mun first. There’s always the chance (especially if this issue isn’t addressed in your rules) that they really have no clue what they’re doing is wrong. New roleplayers especially can fall victim to not knowing what’s ‘okay’ and what’s not. Give them the benefit of the doubt and let them know what’s going on. Say something like, “Hey, I know it’s not in my rules, but when you do {list their behavior here} it actually makes me really uncomfortable. I enjoy writing with you, but I won’t be able to continue our thread if you continue to do this.” If - after you’ve talked to them - they continue to do the thing, then you are well within your rights to walk away without another word. You warned them what would happen and they chose to ignore that warning. That’s on them, not on you.

As for how to stop fearing backlash... I'm sorry, Anon, but I don't have a good answer for that one. I've been writing roleplays on tumblr since 2012, and I still get nervous when I have to talk to someone about something they're doing wrong. I get nervous about it when I have to do it as a mod, too. On COAR I suck it up and do it because it's part of my duties; on my own blogs I find myself weighing the level of the offense (often offering leeway depending on my own comfort levels.) All I can really tell you is that once I’ve said what needs to be said I usually do something to relax and/or treat myself. I’ll spend some extra time on a favorite computer game, or I’ll or buy myself something I’ve been wanting or I’ll have something sweet to eat. It doesn’t help with the anxiousness of dealing with the thing, but it always helps with the aftermath.

I hope some of this has helped you decide what will work best for you in this situation, Anon. Would our followers like to add on any additional ideas? Or maybe share some of their own experiences with any similar situations?

~ Mod MJ ~

#advice #anonymous #answered

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theoutcastedartist · 5 years

Text

No new art really, if you've seen my original post on the MHA amino then you know where this is fucking going. Right down to Angstville because for some reason I'm obsessed with hurting my favorite Goth Jesus. You'd think I'd talk about my "Stain's Redemption" AU first since I've mentioned it but hahahaha

Y o u w e r e w r o n g ;´)

I straight up just copied and pasted my original post because I'm lazy but I REALLY wanted to share this with Tumblr lmao

Warning for (potential) manga spoilersss

Alrighty sinners, Let's get to the post itself then. Shall we?

·············

So let me just address something real quick about how I feel about the latest chapters of the MHA manga:

Seeing Aizawa cry has to be the most heart breaking thing I've seen in MHA (outside of the whole deal with Eri, sweet baby child ;-;)

And I completely FLIPPED when it was revealed that Shirakumo was BASICALLY turned into Kurogiri and just I'M CRYING--Cloud Angel Baby NOOOOOO!!!

They all deserved better than this T-T

Anywho enough about my grieving over fictional characters, let's talk about my AU, inspired by these recent chapters. Note that I'm a terrible writer. I guess this also includes a snippet of what I plan to write for this AU since it transitions from explanation to literature at some point just because I was kinda bored. Imma let you know right now that I'm a shit writer so uuuuh bear with me.

---------

The Reticent AU takes place in an Alternate Universe where Shirakumo is ALIVE and separate from Kurogiri. Instead of Loud Cloud being turned into a Nomu, Eraserhead is turned into one. His appearance for the most part remains the same, minus the scars all over his body, including around the neck, from experimentation.

He barely speaks due to pain he feels when he does talk and has no recollection of his life before being a Nomu, not even his own name. He manages to escape the League of Villains at some point and "befriends" the Hero Killer: Stain, or well more like the other way around (only because I find Stain befriending an emotionless mute to be funny). He finds Stain's views of false hero-hood and admiration for All Might quite contradictory yet amusing and lets him live during their first encounter.

It is rather hard to say whether he is a villain or a vigilante. He'll kill only if necessary but his intentions and motivations are unknown. He despises All Might as the Symbol of Peace. It gives false hope to the people as well as a false sense of security. He found it completely revolting. Aizawa did believe in good people, but All Might isn't one of them in his books. Pretty much considered one only because he's hanging around with Stain.

He never gave himself a name, nor did he care all that much for it, it was Stain who dubbed him with the alias "Reticent", meaning not revealing one's thoughts or feelings readily. He was never one for being open for as long as he could remember.

It's rather fitting, so Reticent keeps the given name.

·············

* I didn't know Shirakumo was tan, not white before I made the art (forgive me)

Oboro Shirakumo A.K.A Loud Cloud is currently the homeroom teacher of our beloved Class 1-A and best friend of our resident screaming banana, Present Mic. They have given up on their dream to start an agency due to the loss of their closest friend from high school. Fifteen years ago when they were still students at UA, Shota Aizawa had gone missing and authorities concluded that he was dead. It was such a heartbreak to Shirakumo and Yamada, that hurt never fully healed.

Shirakumo is still a friendly and nurturing spirit at heart, but not as open with his feelings anymore. He's more reserved with his thoughts and feelings. He's a reticent person.

He takes an instant liking to Ejirou Kirishima and Hitoshi Shinso. Kirishima's friendship with the explosive Katsuki Bakugou reminds him of his friendship with Shota. Their personalities seemed so different, yet their bond had remained solid and strong. As for Shinso, the purple haired teen reminded him of his old friend. He could see the growing potential in these two and takes them both under his wing. The three of them train together outside of school and the Kirishima and Shinso form a close friendship with each other along with their sensei. Both children are like sons to Shirakumo, he thinks that Shota would like them too if he were still here.

·············

So... Izuku Midoriya, the "villain magnet" of class 1-A, ended up finding himself standing face-to-face with the Hero Killer: Stain and... his partner? The news never reported anything on him having a partner. How strange. Either Stain's partner is a very recent addition or this guy was really good at covering his own tracks.

"Stain, leave them be. They are just mere children. Killing them would serve no purpose to your cause. I wouldn't waste your time with Native either. "

Midoriya grimaced at the sore and raspy voice. It sounded painful, but he could hear the underlying threat. The Hero Killer sighed and backed off from Iida's paralyzed body.

The two villains left before Todoroki had arrived.

"I think that's the first time I've ever seen you smile."

Agakuro sat down next to Reticent, who was currently petting a stray cat, and offered him some fruit. The smaller man hummed quietly and took a few slices of apple. Both men sat quietly with the soft purring of the stray.

"I've been meaning to ask, what is your quirk exactly? You can erase quirks, but you can also manipulate basic elements and the blood in people's bodies."

Reticent signed, 'I have more than one.'

"More than one quirk?" Stain cocked an eyebrow.

Reticent nodded and quietly spoke, "Nomu."

"I've heard about their appearances here in Hosu. They are these large looking creatures with their brains exposed. You sure as hell don't look like one of 'em." Agakuro mused as he chewed on some cantaloupe. His friend was making his signals again.

I was suppose to be a more perfected Nomu. All for One took care of my progress himself.'

"Is that why you have so many..."

'Yes.'

·············

"Principal Nezu?" Shirakumo and Yamada stood in the white creature's office. Both men wondering why they were called to see him.

"Ah Loud Cloud and Present Mic! I apologize for pulling you out of your classes, but it seems you both are being called to assist Gran Torino with something he found." Nezu explained. The two men in the room looked at each other confused.

"What does he need us for?"

"Well it seems that they have another one of those Nomus in custody. I think you may remember the name Shota Aizawa?"

·············

Shirakumo was BEYOND annoyed about the situation. It must be a mistake. Their old friend was not some gruesome quirk experiment accompanying the Hero Killer. Shota Aizawa wanted to be a hero, despite feeling that he was inadequate for such due to the nature of his quirk. It has to be a mistake.

"How much longer-"

"Calm down will you! I'm frustrated about this too. There's no way it could be him, but... who knows."

They arrived at the police station withing a few minutes and walk inside. They see Gran Torino standing there waiting for them. They follow him to where Tsukauchi is finishing up with questioning the person inside. Looking through the window, Shirakumo and Yamada's eyes widen with disbelief. The other person looked just like...

"Ah Present Mic, Loud Cloud. Thank you for arriving on such short notice. I know you are both very busy men."

The two Pro-Heros turn to the detective as he stepped out of the interrogation room. Present Mic appeared alarmed and Shirakumo just looked... mad.

"Well it appears that he doesn't remember anything before being experimented on. We have a case of amnesia on our hands."

Shirakumo practically growled,"Experimented on? What the hell are you going on about detective!?" Why was Tsukauchi being so damn vague?

"That man in there is indeed Shota Aizawa. His base quirk of Erasure is still there and DNA results confirm this. From what I'm gathering, fifteen years ago he was kidnapped and had been subjected to illegal drug testing as well as having multiple quirks forced into his body. He's a more sophisticated Nomu it seems."

"More 'sophisticated'? What stopped him from having brains popping out of his skull like all the others we've seen?" The voice hero questioned. Something wasn't adding up here.

"All for One..."

The other three men became tense.

"Isn't... Isn't that the villain All Might fought at Kamino Ward?"

"According to him, it seems that All for One was the one who did this to him personally, there was extra care in your friend's 'recreation'. As to what his added quirks are, we're not sure yet of what they are or even of how many."

Gran Torino turned to the younger men,"We were hoping that you two would talk to him. Maybe to help trigger any memories from before his disappearance."

"So what? You think the 'power of friendship' is going to magically bring back his memories?" Shirakumo scoffed at how ridiculous that would actually be.

"No, but miracles do happen. I've seen many things during my time. They are rare, but they happen."

"Shirakumo," Present Mic started, "if there is even a slim possibility of getting Sho's memories back, shouldn't we at least try? For him?"

Shirakumo sighed at his words, "Fine. For Shota's sake."

The two younger men walk inside.

--------

"Shota?"

'Who were they talking about? Is that his name?'

After the detective had left the room, two other men had walked in. He assumed they were Pros based on the costumes. No normal person dressed in THAT much leather (referring to Present Mic).

"Do you... remember us, Shota? Hizashi and I?"

It looks like they ARE talking to him. He shook his head no. This was the first time he has seen these two men. The way they were looking at him made him uncomfortable.

"Sho...ta? Is... that my name?"

The two men standing winced at his croaking voice. In all honesty, he would sign, but he had no clue if these two even knew sign language. So he just resorted to talking.

"Do you remember your own name?"

"No."

"Do you... remember us?"

The raven haired man shook his head, 'No.'

"Is... Shota my name? Do you know me? I'm sorry I- I'm just... so confused."

His voice was so raspy and weak. Black hair covered the scar under his eye. Hizashi and Oboro wore sad looks on their faces at the sound. The taller of the two, Oboro, knelt down by the man's knees.

"Yes. We do know you. Your name is Shota Aizawa. You were once a member of UA's class 2-A about fifteen years ago." Oboro started as he gently pried one of Shota's hands from the yellow blanket the officers gave him. His arm was covered in scars... like his legs. God only knows what they did to him all those years. Hizashi just observed their movements, unsure of what to do he added on to what Shirakumo said.

"You love cats and taking naps, you were the most rational one out of the three of us. All three of us had dreams of starting an agency together..."

The two pro-heros continued talking for what felt like hours. Shota listened to every word as they recounted their old adventures from highschool. Maybe with enough luck, they could help Shota get him memory back. Shirakumo was starting to think that the raven wasn't ever getting his old memories back until...

"Sushi... I- We had a cat named Sushi?"

Hizashi had flung himself so fast to Shota as he held onto him tightly and cried. Shirakumo also had a tear-streaked face, but he held a blinding smile as he watched Shota awkwardly pat the blond's back.

Miracles do happen.

More of this angst shit coming soon ;)

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coffeeandcalligraphy · 5 years

Note

Hi! I love your youtube channel & I think you're super cool! I'm a newer follower and was wondering if you could give a summary of the concept of Fostered---it sounds like a really interesting series!

Aww thank you!

Yes I can!! Fostered is too thicc for me to give extensive summaries (unless y’all want this) and there is very little you need to know from the earlier books to understand the current ones! That’s because as myself and the series have aged, its genre, age category, and plot points have changed!

Here’s a small outline of the main characters:

Reeve

Protagonist + narrator for all “main” Fostered books

Sister of Lonan

Will write salty breakup songs about people she was never in a relationship with

Bi as fuck!

Foster

Was once Reeve’s boyfriend?? no??

Best friend of Harrison

Will write love songs about tofu

Ace as fuck!!!

Harrison

Best friend of Foster

Also Reeve’s best friend!

Sort of love-interest of Lonan (we’re getting there lol)

Will write love songs about waffles

Gay! as! fuck!

Protagonist of Moth Work

Lonan

Reeve’s brother!

An antagonist for a good chunk of this series

Will not write love songs he has no heart (he does I am just mean)

Also bi as fuck!! Everyone is bi in that family lol we love it

Here’s a breakdown (CW: there’s a lot of violence/convo about mental illness/potentially triggering content in these summaries, so tread with caution):

Fostered (book 1) to Resisted (book 3):

These books (Fostered, Hunted, Resisted) are probably the most harmonious out of the 6 (7 including Moth Work) so far! That’s because for a long time, I believed Fostered would end at three books (initially a standalone, then duology). They’re all closely linked through the “foster homes” plot (hence the name of the series) and are obviously the most dystopian of the books (all three are also YA). You can feel the 2014 dystopian vibes in this book lol. I wrote this summary 5 years ago for my first ask ever and it sums up that idea:

The book takes place in the not-too-distant future where children who’ve committed crimes, are neglected, or have chosen to, are sent to behavioural detention centres – what everyone else that’s not the government like to call ‘foster homes’. The story revolves around a fifteen-year-old girl named Reeve who’s lived two years in a ‘foster home’ after being accused of her sister’s murder. Following an accident that she caused which subsequently led to her escape of her foster home, she stumbles across a group of kids, who like her, have gone through the lifestyle and also have escaped. She makes an alliance with them and everything seems in its place until she finds out that a team of hunters are searching for her because of the same accident. Unable to remember anything that happened from the event, she then learns that maybe all things don’t point to her – what really happened on the day she escaped?

(props to 14-year-old me for writing this)

I wrote these three books so quickly (though at the time, as a thirteen-year-old, it felt like drafting took forever). I started Fostered in October of 2014, and by May of 2015, I was halfway through Resisted :))))). How?? These books are all above 85k??? I could never!!!

FOSTERED (book 1 - YA dystopian):

Follows the above plot. What isn’t mentioned above is how this book starts. We start with Reeve (15 at the time–a baby!!!) chillin in an abandoned storage unit she was hoping to use as shelter. HOWEVER, plot twist of the season–there are already people there!

She’s semi-ambushed by these people who she later learns are our good ol’ pals Foster and Harrison. The boys are also taking care of a 6-year-old girl named Essie who they love fiercely!! They’re sketched out by Reeve, which we later find out is because–they! know! her!

Foster, Harrison, and Reeve were actually all the closest pals in a ‘foster home’ they called WAFFLE. Reeve forgets that during the disastrous accident she causes that separates them (she blows up the foster home lmaooo) but lookie here–the squad is reunited! Eventually everyone comes to love each other (though it ain’t like that in the beginning) + Foster and Reeve have a romance which I find so bizarre now?? They would never.

The squad is being “hunted” by a group of “chasers” (I LOVE dystopian lool) headed by a woman named Red who is actually?? a badass? She tries to kill them a bunch of times, Reeve kills Lonan’s sister by using her as a human shield, Essie dies, I’m awful!

HUNTED (book 2 - YA dystopian):

After Essie’s death, the group is shook! Harrison especially as he is *soft* and the “leader” of the group. To protect his other ducklings who are now the most sought after people in America lmao (Foster and Reeve), he does something SCANDALOUS and joins the *government* AKA all the evil people putting innocent children in these awful detention centres. What a 180! Essentially, he does this to purposefully manipulate investigations into Foster and Reeve away from them, but Reeve doesn’t know this so she’s cheesed when she finds out (she feels #betrayed)!

Harrison’s departure of the group triggers the group’s breakup. Harrison joins an *elite* section of the government that *I believe* tries to wrangle runaway foster kids?? This group is lead by our other good pal Lonan and this is the first book he appears in! He takes Red’s place as antagonist in this book.

The group also includes Holly, a badass who is also Foster’s older sister (and also Lonan’s first serious girlfriend)! She’s scary! She also dies by hanging in a blood-drinking cult mid-way through this book! don’t! ask! Margo is this group’s tech analyst, and she’s a mentally distant hippie (and Harrison’s first and last serious girlfriend which obvi didn’t work out lol he’s gay!) Idk what Harrison’s job was here, but he learns techy stuff from Margo!

This book is important because it establishes Lonan, who continues to be a pivotal character as the series progresses. It also establishes Lonan and Harrison’s relationship. Obvi Lonan is the antagonist in this book and won’t make his redemption arc for another 1book lol, but him and Harrison have a bit of a bizarre relationship. Though they’re almost rivals, they almost adore being each other’s rivals (but don’t tell them that)? After Harrison leaves Lonan’s team, the squad essentially is *hunted* by them, hence the book title lol.

By the end of this book, a few important things happen! Lonan kills Margo (remember, Harrison’s first and last girlfriend lol, we could say Lonan was killing his competition lol is that too much), this obviously reinforces his role as bad guy! After the book’s events, Lonan eventually overtakes the group and they’re all imprisoned! Love it!

RESISTED (book 3 - YA dystopian):

This is my favourite Fostered book because there’s just so much tea! We start in “headquarters” AKA Lonan’s pride and joy! After he kills off his old boss so he can be Ultimate Antagonist (actually because she essentially killed his girlfriend ahaha), he’s the Man in Charge and power trippin like crazy.

Reeve is separated from Foster and Harrison who are also in HQ because she’s mentally unwell. Lonan has given her the job of executing people (because he is evil) which she ain’t diggin! so Lonan takes it upon himself to address her mental health concerns (which obviously isn’t helping because they mutually hate each other).

Eventually, Reeve barters with Lonan for what she wants by using Holly’s death (which only she and Foster witnessed) as leverage. As I mentioned above, Lonan essentially kills/drives away his entire *elite government squad* which means! He needs another one! Reeve uses this as an opportunity and says WELL you COULD hire Foster and Harrison. Lonan does and VOILA we suddenly have a new squad!

This is really where we build a relationship between Lonan and Reeve who have previously done nothing but try to kill each other! They actually bond in this bizarre kind of way. While they still don’t like each other, they mutually understand each other more than Foster and Harrison do as in many ways, Lonan and Reeve have both done the same awful things (lots of killing people :))).

This all builds up to the epic reveal that they are actually half siblings (they share a mother) and oh DOES THE TEA START BOILING. This news causes major tension in the OG squad (Reeve, Foster, Harrison) as Foster and Harrison think Lonan has done too many irredeemable things to be forgiven, despite the fact that he and Reeve are related. They are right! However, Reeve isn’t so quick to decide.

She and Lonan go through a lot together (including kidnapping! attempted murder! An explosion! Reeve pretending to be a corpse!) which are still some of my favourite things to re-read and the reason I love this book the most out of all the books I’ve written. This is where #redemption arc occurs!

This book is too long for me to cover everything, but essentially their relationship is the most important! The book ends when the squad (now joined by Lonan) is forced out of hiding because Reeve is injured and actually needs real medical attention! This leads to ANOTHER separation, with Reeve heading back to a foster home for the first time in a few years!

Hollowed (book 4) to Rewired (book 6)

HOLLOWED (book 4 - YA (?) dystopian (?))

Book four is my least favourite book of the 6 and that’s because it’s melodramatic and I was finding my writing style! It’s not quite appropriate for YA because of its violent subject matter, but wouldn’t appeal to adults, so it’s a bit category-less. Dystopian elements still exist, but are less relevant, so it’s also a bit muddled in term of genre.

All you need to know in terms of events are that Reeve meets someone named Lincoln in the foster home she’s put in (see previous) who ends up being a horrifically abusive person. He sort of shifts into the role as antagonist, though from this book on, the lines between good guys and bad guys blur. Hollowed also introduces a new character–Glenne! Glenne is Lonan’s second serious girlfriend and remnants of this relationship still show up in current Fostered spinoffs (tho she will be irrelevant in Houses With Teeth most likely).

SPLINTERED (book 5 - YA?????)

The genre and category of this book are impossible to define. We continue almost where we left off in book four, and this book is pretty unremarkable in terms of events lol. The squad remains the same, except toward the end, we’re introduced to Darren, a dude from California who hears about Lonan’s *elite government squad* (before the government disowned him) and hopes they can help him locate his missing brother (tho he don’t reveal this until book six).

This book is mostly about Lonan’s declining mental health that still has not gotten better. Some hints of Lonan and Harrison’s relationship getting closer are also dropped in this book.

REWIRED (book 6 - Adult (???) literary fiction sometimes???)

The category of this book is bizarre. It begins as weirdly maybe almost YA, but dips into adult literary fiction at some points. This book is where I really grasped my style and so the genre and category reflect that transition.

What you need to know about Rewired is the progression of Darren and Reeve’s relationship as it goes from acquaintances to PALS to MORE THAN PALS to I don’t! want to be! your! pal! This book is so weird and disjointed because of this transition away from YA dystopian and into adult literary fiction. We also get even more Lonan and Harrison relationship development as Reeve meddles her way into business that is not hers!

MOTH WORK (spinoff - no categories anymore I have no idea)

The most recent Fostered book! We finally get to see Lonan and Harrison’s relationship on the page and oh boy! Is there tea! As Lonan struggles to grasp trauma from childhood, and Harrison struggles to help him, their relationship goes to places it ain’t never been before! This eventually leads to a much needed separation where Lonan explores a new relationship with Eliza (his father’s ex oooooof) and Harrison figures out what he needs in order to live a healthier, happier life. MW is a bridge between book six and seven.

HOUSES WITH TEETH (book 7 - adult literary fiction *I’m hoping*)

I have yet to write this book, but we’re back in Reeve’s head! Here’s a synopsis I’ve shared before:

After escaping a toxic relationship, twenty-year-old Reeve disappears for the second time in one year. She’s drawn to Wicker, a mealy town outside New York City, whose disappearances of affluent girls has caught her attention. The day she arrives, a sinkhole buries one of them in the front yard of her new home, a fixer-upper she shares with estranged friend, Foster. Quickly she falls prey to speculation by herself and others, who try to connect her to the tragedy. And even stranger, false recognitions as the girl in the ground, and the many other missing Wicker girls make her feel more and more like one of them–these alluring, unknown women.

This book is very much my vibe now as a writer, however, it’s been difficult to re-integrate back into Reeve’s head with all Fostered’s dystopian elements removed! I don’t have much else to share about this book since I know so little about it, but it is essentially my current project.

So I hope that was helpful! There’s a lot of unexplored territory that I worry might be impossible to get into because I legitimately do not remember a lot @sarahkelsiwrites calls me a fake fan lol (I genuinely am), but if y’all ever want to know more, I am 100% down to share whatever! This was also a lot of info so if y’all have questions, send ‘em in!

Enjoy this abridged version of Fostered!

–Rachel

#fostered #amwriting #writeblr #writerblr

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softcherubhips · 4 years

Text

I need to vent. I'm aware this will probably cause some controversy. Please know that I am open to any and all interpretation and constructive criticism so please feel free to message me with ANY questions or concerns you have! I mean it when I say that I am here for you, even if you just need a shoulder to cry on or another human to vent to.

Here are some facts that I know to be true. I am white. I am an American citizen. I am a mother. I am a grandmother. I am a person who has lost someone who died from cancer. I am a recovering drug addict. I am a wife. I am bisexual. I am a Christian. I like to think of myself as a realist. I realize that white privilege exists. Do I claim to be knowledgeable of all things controversial? ABSOLUTELY NOT! Do I want to educate myself and try to learn all that I can about said controversies? ABSOLUTLEY YES!

I saw a post earlier that said, "can y'all stop reblogging those “i am not black, but i see you” post like im begging...." I consider myself to be an ally of many people and many causes including Black Lives Matter. As I stated earlier, I am white, which obviously means I'm not black. Does that mean I cannot get behind the Black Lives Matter cause? If this is the case then logically it would make sense for me to say hey you can't support ovarian cancer awareness because your mom didn't die from ovarian cancer. Right?

Listen, I know what it feels like to be in a minority. NOT in the black minority, but a minority nonetheless. I grew up on the Flathead Indian Reservation. There were 6 other white people in my high school and 2 of them were my brothers. I don't say this to gain sympathy or in any way compare it to being in a black minority. I am just saying that I had many friends that were kind to me and supported me even though we were of a different race. It's hard to be in a minority. It's very comforting when you are a minority to know that someone else supports you and cares about you despite your differences, your skin color, your customs or beliefs, your heritage and your history.

We all belong to the human race. In my heart of hearts I feel like I would categorize myself as an introvert. I often make up excuses and cancel plans so I don't have to interact with other people. I hate this about myself and it's something I am continually working on. Because I tend to isolate and use various "crutches" to escape and numb out (pills, fan fiction, food, sleep, books, movies/tv shows etc.,), it's nice to know that someone else has your back and sees you and wants to help you. It's comforting to have a cheerleader; someone who cheers you on from the sidelines and believes in you, your dreams, aspirations and potential. It's healthy and normal for us as humans to crave interaction, kindness, attention, validation, support and love.

You don't know if I have two first cousins who are married to black people and have black children who I have personally reached out to by phone and verbally voiced my support. (I do and I have.) You don't know if I have donated money to several different Black Lives Matter causes. (I have.) You don't know if I volunteered my time one Saturday afternoon at The Navajo Nation food bank in Salt Lake City. (I did.) You don't know if I own a hijab that I can wear when I visit the local Muslim Temple with my friend. (I do.) You don't know if I actively vocalize my belief that children DO NOT belong on motorcycle or ATVS; no exceptions. (I do.) *This one gets my blood boiling. I held my best friend in my arms as her 2 year old son lie dead in a little blue coffin because his father thought it would be fun to take him on a ride on his motorcycle around the block. I will not make any exceptions to this. It's not cute. It's not safe. It's not fun. Don't do it.*

You're a Catholic? GREAT! I'll quit eating candy for 40 days with you to make Lent a little less lonely. You're a Muslim? AWESOME! I'll cover your shift while you go do salat. You're a native from India? SUPER! I won't eat beef in front you because I wouldn't want to make you uncomfortable. You're a Jew? FANTASTIC! I'll help you make challah for Rosh Hashanah. You're a Native American? AMAZING! Please let me vocally support Indigenous People's Day instead of Columbus Day. You're a recovering/ active addict? REMARKABLE! Me too! Please tell me if I say or do anything that triggers you.

Do you understand what I am trying to say? We are all members of the human race. No one wants to be alone in this journey called life. It's nice to have someone there in your corner, cheering you on, whether they are quiet about it or choose to shout it from the rooftops. Call me naive, but I believe that we can COEXIST.

It all boils down to the first and great commandment....LOVE ONE ANOTHER. Even if you don't believe in God, I think we can all get behind this mantra. Just be a good human. Treat people with kindness. Choose love. Be nice to nice. Don't stand idly by while a fellow member of the human race is suffering. Do something. Say something. Stand for something. Educate yourself.

In conclusion, I will support you. Unless it is something inherently evil that you actively and vocally support, ie: nazis, white supremacy, homicide, rape, child pornography, domestic violence, etc., I will be there. In whatever capacity is comfortable for you, I will be there.

Take care my fellow humans. In my heart of hearts I choose to believe that Good will ALWAYS conquer Evil.

#i hope i was able to convey my feelings without offending anyone #although deep down i know people will always find offense in many things if it doesn't line up with their core beliefs #i am praying for all the families that have been affected by this ugly preventable tragedy #blm #may god have mercy on us all #george floyd #tpwk #eat the apple #let it burn #speak your truth #validate and accept #show respect #stand and deliver #lead me guide me walk beside me #help me find the way #speak up. speak out. speak your truth.#say my name #coexist #life's a dance #tread lightly #be gentle and humble and aware and polite and selfless and compassionate and kind and respectful and empathetic #just be a good human and do what you can in regards to your own individual situation #thank you for listening to my sincere and heartfelt opinion #✌🤟🙏🥰😘😇#if you are a person who prays i encourage you to pray for a resolution to the tragic and unfortunate circumstances that are affecting us all #i love you. i see you. i stand with you.#i bless it #all the love - liesl/lou/luna 💝#you can make a difference

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deadmomjokes · 5 years

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I need "Mom" advice...I get married in a couple months and honestly I'm nervous about sex. My actual mom never talked to me about it...was taboo. I barely learned about my period, except some friends explained and helped me through it. I'm afraid I won't make my husband happy or it will hurt. I've heard varying stories of friends' first times, and I don't want things to be awkward. I don't even know how to bring it up with my fiancé.

Thank you SO much forfeeling comfortable coming to me! I’ll try to give a basic “sex ed” lessonhere, and if you’re worried about specific things, please feel free to comeback and ask more, or PM me, or send me an ask off anon to ask about email if you’drather do it that way. Whatever’s going to be most helpful for you. I hope Ican address the concerns you listed, and possibly some that might be underlyingin general (most people have a lot of nebulous nervous feelings surroundingphysical intimacy that can be hard to put to words).

(For those uninterested or uncomfortable, a verybig TW for talking about sexual activity in a scientific sort of way, buttechnical terms and (respectful) descriptions may abound.) LOOOOOOOOONG post ahead, but hopefully comprehensive, respectful, and useful.

First Things First I Guess

Firstly, please know it’s super normal to benervous about sex. Almost everyone is, especially in family or social culturesthat don’t normalize talking about sex. We also do a crappy job in general offormal education about sex and sexuality, so too many people (especially women)aren’t given any background. If both of you are virgins, or new to sexualactivity in general, I bet he’s actually nervous too.

Second, bringing it up is going to be hard, butSO important. It might be worth sitting down and simply saying “I haveno idea how to bring this up, but here it is: I’m worried about sex.” The basis for any good sex life is communication and respect. Ifhe’s not nervous but you are, he has to respect that and be understanding ofthe time you may need to adjust. My guess is he has concerns as well, and beingable to talk about it together will bring a huge measure of relief to both ofyou. Another idea to bring it up would be to write an email or text saying thatyou’re not sure how to bring it up, but want to make sure both of you arecomfortable talking about it, so is there a time y’all could talk about it.Idk, that might be a bit formal for how you guys usually do things, but I knowsome people think better in written form. But being able to talk about your concerns, and having a shared general expectation of how things will go the first time is going to be helpful in making sure you’re not terrified of your honeymoon.

Third, and this is the big one: Almost no one’sfirst sexual encounter goes how they think it will, and that’s almost all because of unrealistic expectations. Sex is a weird concept, bodies areweird, and our cultural and social idea of sex is HIGHLY romanticizedand “sterilized” as it were. We have this Hollywood idea of what sex lookslike and is, and real sex has never been that way. It may end up being awkward physically (more later on that), but that’s okay, because that’s often just how things are, and sexual experiences tend to get better with time. Our culture has normalized the idea of “perfect sex” and promotes this big romantic “first time” narrative, but it almost never works out that way. Not to say it won’t or can’t be fun for you, just know it won’t be all fireworks and amazement right off the bat, because there’s a lot to coordinate between two people and four limbs and blankets and stuff.

Sex might be physically strange or a bit uncomfortable especially the firsttime, but if done properly it doesn’t have to hurt. By done properly, I meangiving both parties enough time to adjust, warm up, and become comfortablewith the situation. First intercourse with any partner, but especially yourfirst EVER partner should be about exploring and admiring each others’ bodies,without pressure to actually engage in classical intercourse (meaningpenetrative intercourse) if you don’t feel up to it. Being very nervous can prevent your body fromadapting in the way it needs to in order to be comfortable and pain-free duringintercourse.

The body has a complex system of reactions thatgear it up for intercourse, but here’s the basics.

How Sex Works Physically

What most people refer to as “foreplay” isgenerally not an optional thing for comfortable sex; smooching, cuddling, and a feeling of closeness are basically necessary to trigger thechemical reactions that start the physical adaptations for sex. Going from 0 (hey how’s it going) to60 (penetrative sex) instantly is going to be uncomfortable at best, but will likely hurtespecially in the beginning. Plus you won’t get anything out of it, and committed-partner sexshould be about emotional closeness as much as it is about physical sensationfor BOTH partners. So spending time cuddling and kissing is an important partof “actual sex.” The chemicals that are released during this time trigger yourbody to send increased bloodflow to the sexual organs, starting the sexual response cycle. (NOTE: Some people can begin the sexual response cycle by thinking about sex, reading or viewing erotic material, or “talking dirty,” so if y’all are really worked up and into it, much “traditional” foreplay like making out may not be necessary. This is usually what’s going on with what people refer to as a “quickie,” both parties are already physically prepared for sex because they’ve been thinking about it and that triggered the sexual response to begin.)

In female/afab bodies, the increased bloodflowresults in swelling of the labia (external parts) and a feeling of fullness,which increases physical sensation (perception of touch), which in turn triggersthe production of lubrication (some people refer to this as getting orbeing “wet” if you’ve heard that term thrown around. And don’t worry, it’s not like a ton of liquid, it won’t be like peeing everywhere or anything, it just makes sure things can move around easily, like an oil coating in a pan.) It also triggers thevagina (the internal parts) to expand, and the vaginal opening to relax and expand. Thesethree processes (lubrication, internal expansion, and external relaxation) are important in making sure sex doesn’t hurt. Like I said,with first intercourse, it may still be a bit uncomfortable because it’s a new sensation and your brain may still be on “no sex, sex is off-limits” mode, evensubconsciously. But if you experience pain–sharp or burning or stinging or stabbing pain, not just pressure (which is normal)– that’s not good, and you should back off and try again later after moresmoochy times or even a good night’s sleep.

Male/amab bodies are somewhat easier to understandbecause much of their adaptation happens externally, and also it’s much moresocially discussed. The penis has a complicated system of tissues that trapthe increased bloodflow coming in, resulting in the enlargement and hardeningof the penis (this is called “erection,” or sometimes informally “getting hard”). It also triggers a production of lubrication, but this is muchless than is produced by the vagina. The male lubrication comes from theopening in the penis, which is called the urethra. (Yes, it is technically thesame tube and opening where urine comes from, but the body totally shuts offthe valve at the bladder for intercourse, so there is no risk of cross-contamination.)During this time, the testicles (most often called the balls, of course) arepreparing semen, which contains sperm and is a thick, viscous liquid. (Theprostate also helps in producing this liquid.) During male orgasm, the semen isexpelled from the same urethral opening mentioned above.

To define, orgasm is the point at which the bodypeaks in pleasure, and is generally the result of repeated physical stimulationto erogenous zones. Erogenous zones are the parts of the body that producesexual pleasure when stimulated. (For many people, this includes not only thegenitals, but the nipples as well.) Male orgasm is easy to identify because itis almost always accompanied by ejaculation (expulsion of the semen), butfemales also orgasm. During female orgasm, the muscles of the vagina anduterus repeatedly contract, which can’t be seen of course(leading folks in the past to believe women couldn’t orgasm).

So, a quick recap: you get all smoochy, then you get all handsy, then clothes come off somewhere in the smoochy and touchy phases, and then if youwant comes penetrative sex. This is the part most people are scared of, and hasthe potential to cause pain if you’re not ready mentally or physically (as inyour sexual response hasn’t yet kicked in all over your body).

I know this is kind of squirmy to say, but itmay actually take several tries (sometimes over several days) toactually “succeed” at penetrative sex, meaning that the penis can enterthe vagina without pain to the vagina-owner. It could also be difficult to findexactly where to put the penis, because generally penis-owners don’t know muchabout what they’re looking for (especially if you’re both virgins), andvagina-owners can’t see what’s going on. So keeping a sense of humor and a lineof communication is super important. Sex is WEIRD. It’s just weird and bizarrewhen you start thinking about it (at least to me, on the asexual spectrum), andacknowledging that and realizing that it won’t be some glamorous tangle oflimbs set to romantic music like on the TV is going to go a long way toward making your experience somuch more positive, and much less awkward.

Mentioned Worries

Re:not wanting it to be awkward. Luckily, it won’t have to be emotionally awkward or embarrassing if y’all go into it with the same expectations, and those expectations are realistic. There’s physical awkwardness, like how a box that’s not heavy but is weirdly shaped is “awkward,” and that’s going to happen no matter what because you’ve never had experience with how to do this sex thing, and you’re not sure where to put your limbs or how to move around another person. But what can be avoided is FEELING awkward, emotional awkwardness, and that’s done through having realistic expectations of what sex is and how it works, and of knowing that both of you are on the same page with this, and are interested in making it work for both of you.

You also mentioned being worried you won’t make your husband happy–I want you to knowboth that this is fine and a good desire (to make him happy), but that it’s not your responsibility to sexually please your husband, and sex is something for BOTH of you. It’s not all on you, it literally takes two to make itwork. Sex isn’t all about him; if it’s something you want to share in yourrelationship, it should be something you want to make work for you, as well as for him. So he has as much responsibility to you as you do to him, to be respectful of your boundaries especially as youfirst get introduced to sex, and to “take care of you” as much as you dofor him. Sex with a new partner is going to take trial and error indiscovering what you both like and dislike, and it’s okay and necessary to be vocal andsay “Please don’t do that” if you need to. I know that you WANT to make him happy, and that’s excellent, because hopefully he wants to do that for you, too! Just know that if sex is kind of weird at first, or y’all can’t quite figure out what’s up on night one, it doesn’t mean you’ve failed as a partner, that you let him down, or that you won’t be able to satisfy each other in the future (even the near future). Adjust expectations so that your first experience isn’t about having the most amazing sex you’ll ever have (more on that in a bit), but about discovering this new facet of your relationship together.

You also mentioned you were afraid of ithurting, and this is the most common fear about sex. You probably heard or readstuff about “breaking the hymen” or “tearing” or something like that.While some girls will have small tears in the hymen (the flap of skin thatsometimes partially covers the vaginal opening), a lot of girls won’t, and thisskin stretches as the physical sexual response (sometimes calledsimply “arousal”) progresses. It’s also less likely to tearor “break” during sex if you’ve used tampons before, because tampons sometimesactually rupture the hymen just by their nature. (This isn’t to say you shouldstart using tampons if you’re not comfortable, of course.) If the hymen doesrupture, you might experience a bit of bleeding, but it’s nothing a pad can’thandle (much MUCH less than a period, more like getting a small cut on yourarm). Sometimes you won’t notice a rupture til after sex if you’re really intoit, but you might also feel it or feel it about to start. If that happens and it hurts, bevocal and tell your partner to stop. You don’t have to hurt during sex, youdon’t owe that to anyone. In fact, you owe it to yourself to NOT endure painjust for someone else’s pleasure. So it might be worth talking to your fiancebeforehand and having a stop-word, which can literally just be “Stop.” Butboth of you should understand going into this that either one of you has the right tosay “no more” at any point.

It may also be worth considering getting somelubricant (”lube”) if you’re really worried about pain, because most pain comesfrom insufficient biological lubrication or insufficient stretching of thevaginal opening, and lube can help with both. Many people find it super fun toapply to each other, apparently, and it can certainly be useful when you’rejust starting out and both new to this idea. (also, if using a condom, lube is important because sometimes the material can irritate the sensitive skin of the vagina and labia) But the most important things youtwo can do for each other as you embark on this adventure together are to bewilling to voice your opinions and feelings, and also to take time to get toknow each others’ bodies and preferences. That’s more or less part of what the honeymoon is for.

Also, make sure you go to the gynecologistbefore you get married. It’s might be awkward or feel a bit embarrassing, but super important in making sureyou’re healthy for sex (just know that gyns do this for a living and have literally seen it all, so your body won’t be a big deal, and they aren’t judging you). And if you happen to have a problem like vaginismus(painful spasms or contractions of the vaginal opening that prevent anythingfrom entering, including tampons or medical equipment) or an obstructive hymen,the Gyn can tell you and help you with that. You can also ask them questions you have about sex, and some Gyns have tools you can use at home to “stretch” the vaginal opening (it’s not generally necessary and is more for psychological assistance than huge physical benefit, but some people who are truly small might actually need a bit of help there, so it’s up to you). You will also probably want birthcontrol, or to discuss options about birth control unless y’all are planning ona baby right away. (Also he should go to the doc and get a checkup, too, justto be safe, and if he’s ever had other sexual partners at any time in the past, he should get checkedfor STDs.)

The Big Important Thing to Remember

Please know:Wedding night sex isn’t going to be the best sex you’ll ever have ever. Cultures inwhich waiting is the expectation or norm (Christianity is the big one for this)tend to promote this idea that your wedding night will be a big amazing reward for waiting, and isgoing to be the most important and pleasurable sex you’ll ever have in your whole entire life and if it isn’t, you’ve done something wrong. It creates a huge amount of pressure surrounding what can already be an emotionally laden experience. But studies on sexual satisfactionshow that couples who have been together for years have the greatest levels ofsatisfaction. So please don’t go into it expecting that your first intercourseis going to make it or break it. It’s more than likely going to be a bit weird even though it will hopefully also be fun and pleasurable, but you’ll have better sex as time goes on and you get to know eachother and figure out what the heck you’re doing.

Think of it this way: say you LOVE music, and have always wanted to play a piano. You’ve never gotten to be around a real piano before, but playing the piano is a lifelong dream. Are you going to expect yourself to be able to play Mozart the first time you walk into a room with a piano? No! That doesn’t mean that the experience of sitting down at a piano for the first time won’t be euphoric and a fulfillment of a dream, but you can’t go into it thinking or expecting that you’ll be a master the first time you touch the keys. Look at little kids meeting a piano– they just smash around on the keys and it sounds awful to US as adults who know what it “should sound like” and who might even know how to read music and play a bit, but that kid is having the time of their life experiencing the magic of music and of playing the piano. First having sex is like that. It probably won’t be perfect, and you may look back on it years down the road and kind of go “wow we were goofy and weird,” but it can still be fun as long as you aren’t expecting perfection going in. So no, your wedding night isn’t going to be The Objectively Best Sex Ever, and you probably won’t be quite sure what you’re doing and might even be kind of bad at it, but that doesn’t mean it won’t also be nice and wonderful. You’re not doing something wrong if you aren’t over the moon with your first experience; it just means you have something even better to look forward to figuring out and experiencing together! Especially if both of you are virgins, you may have a bit of a time figuring out how things work, but that’s not a sign of failure.

Plus, when you’ve been culturally surrounded by a narrative of taboo, it can feel mentally scary to suddenly engage in something that used to be off-limits in the biggest of ways. That’s why talking about it frankly is important (and why I have no problem with discussing sex in educational terms!), and why it’s important to discuss with your partner throughout y’all’s sexual life together.

Sex is messy, there’s fluids everywhere, people get sweaty, bodies are weird, and our brains are weird. But I hope knowing all this can help you feel a bit more prepared, and a bit more comfortable. I know this was long and a ton of info, but I’m super passionate about making sure people are educated thoroughly about this stuff, because I never knew any of it growing up. Our school lied to the state about sex-ed; we were supposed to have it, and they didn’t, but said they did. I never got the sex talk because I wasn’t interested in guys OR girls (I was ace and had no clue, another place education failed all of us), so my mom never told me anything about it. I learned a lot in college through classes and through academic research, and then more when I switched to health as a major (and became enraged that we don’t talk about this stuff!!).

So I hope that despite being long-winded, it can be a useful reference, and hopefully put some worries to rest or at least take it down a notch. And do let me know if you have further questions, or if this was totally off the mark for what you were looking for!

#sex tw #long post #advice #sex education

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