#i'm sorry we finally have content after almost a year i will Not be shutting up

[satorusugurugurl]

JJK Men: Accidentally Finding Your Private Photos

Characters: Gojo Satoru, Geto Suguru, Nanami Kento, AFAB!Reader

Warnings: language, smut, unprotected, sex, cream, pies, oral sex, photography,, consensual photography, minions of nudes

Word Count: 4,861

A/N: I finally finished one of the pool from so long ago! I have to be at work in the next six hours so I’m only gonna get about two hours of sleep, but it was well worth getting this written. Geto’s nearly took me out but Nanami’s MGBBGHBJNCRGHG yummy

Gojo Satoru:

“Oh wait! Wait until you see these pictures of Megumi!” Gojo laughed out loud, smacking his thigh as you both sat in your living room. “The kid got messed up!”

“You're such an ass sometimes.” you laughed, glancing over at his phone. “It was a grade two curse.” Gojo waved a hand before you as he flipped through his photo gallery. You grimaced, feeling nothing but pure sympathy for the young boy, while your best friend snickered. “Yikes, poor kid.”

Gojo put his phone down with a content sigh. “Shoko fixed him up; he's sleeping it off.”

“Maybe he wouldn't have needed to sleep it off if you weren't too busy grabbing kikufuku.”

You felt the couch shift as Gojo dropped one of his long arms around you. “Someone's just upset she didn't get any!” He pursed his lips together, bringing his other hand up to poke you in the cheek. “I ate them all on the bullet train home~!”

You could feel your cheeks flush as you shut your eyes tight, trying to make it seem as though you were pissed off by his childish teasing when in reality, you were resisting the urge to rub your thighs together as the smell of his cologne overwhelmed you. Gojo Satoru might be your best friend and boyfriend, but he was annoying and overly confident, which left most people with a sour taste when forced to be around him. But you liked that about him.

He was an egotistical little shit, but he was your egotistical shit.

“Hey, I'm sorry; I promise to get you a bag next time.” Gojo squeezed you against his side, allowing you to feel the warmth of his body.

“Whatever, I don't care, not when I went to that new sweet shop without you when you were gone.”

The gasp that left Gojo’s mouth was soap opera-worthy—as if you had just told him his twin brother, who had fallen down an elevator shaft, was still alive. There was something almost satisfying in how he reeled back, his eyebrows furrowing underneath his blindfold.

“You promised me that we would go together!”

“Yeah? Well, I promised the second year that if they could successfully make a talisman that could prevent me from crossing a line, I would take them out for ice cream. And I was promised kikufuku! So it looks like we both broke our word!”

“You Little shit! I can’t believe you went without me!”

“Yeah, I did, and guess what?”

Gojo leaned down, his eyebrows twitching under his blindfold. “What?”

“It was fucking delicious!” you watched with satisfaction as your boyfriend slumped forward, dropping his head down.

“You’re so cruel.”

“I wouldn’t have had to brag if some gluttonous idiot didn’t forget to bring me kikufuku to share as he promised!”

“I’m sorry!”

“Oh, you’re sorry?”

“No, not really?”

You scoffed as you scrolled through your photos. “Oh, you’re going to be sorry.” Before your boyfriend could question what you were doing, you turned your camera to him and showed him the photos of the different desserts you had ordered in the second year.

“Stop!” he slowly licked his lips. “What is that, and why can I taste it?!”

You zoomed in on the banana pudding Maki had ordered. “Southern banana pudding with vanilla wafer and whipped cream topping..” before you could flip through the rest of the photos, your phone was plucked out of your hands.

“I hate you.” snarled them, moving through your photos in your gallery. “ I hate you so much that I’m taking you back to that same café after work, and I’m not gonna buy you anything, and I’m gonna make you watch me eat the banana—” his words were abruptly cut off as he scrolled to another photo—one that wasn’t of pastries and cake but if you.

You were nothing but a sheer black Lacey bra and matching thong. The camera was pointed above you, getting a great shot of your beautiful body. The curves and dips were so gorgeous that the swells of your breasts caught his attention. He could see your nipples through the fabric, making his mouth and anticipation of a different kind of treat.

“Toru?” the snapping fingers drew his attention away from your phone screen. “Hey, are you okay?”

“I’m starving.” His voice was deeper than normal, and a certain tone behind it caused heat to pool between his legs.

“W-Well,” you cleared your throat. Do you know what you’re hungry for? Did you see anything else you liked from the café besides the banana pudding?”

“Oh, I saw something I liked but wasn’t from the café.”

He doesn’t even give you a chance to ask him what he wants. Instead, he turns the phone to you, much to your shock. There are no pastries on the screen. It is the photo you took the night before and the new set you bought at the store for tonight. You gasped, reaching for your phone only to have your boyfriend hold it up above his freakishly tall head.

“Oh my God! Why did you scroll that far!?”

“Why didn’t you send these to me last night?”

“I just wanted to see what it looks like on me!” hands grabbed your hips, pulling you back against your boyfriend's sturdy form.

His lips slowly trailed over your neck as he pulled you down one of the dark alleyways of the school, somewhere away from fellow sorcerers or students. “Do you want to know what I think of that pretty little set?” Gojo listened to you. I think you look delicious in it, and I just so happen to be starving.” His head tilted slightly, grinning so wide the dimple in his cheek deepened. So are you going to let me devour you?”

Both of you breathe heavily, your eyes roaming over his face breath, brushing over your bottom lip. The tension was so thick before you snapped, grabbing his face and both your hands smashing your lips against his as he growled, kissing you back with as much passion. That kiss shifted into something that most people would write as NC-17. Gojo was able to control him himself, but when he found out you were wearing the same set from the picture, he suddenly wrapped his arms around you and lifted you off the ground, pinning you against the wall. Your skirt was pushed up to your hips while your pretty panties were pulled to the side. His mouth pressed against your neck, muffling his moans. Your moans muffled as his right hand pressed firmly against your mouth.

“Shit baby, you’re so fucking wet for me, sweetheart.” his left hand massaged your thigh, easing the ache that accompanied the burning sensation of you trying to keep your legs wrapped firmly around his waist as he pushed himself deeper inside of you, slamming you against the concrete wall.

“Mm~!! Mmm~!”

Your sweet, muffled moans against your boyfriend’s palm only had him moving faster to draw more out. “God, I’m so lucky to have a girlfriend is fucking sexy and stunning as you. Anything you wear looks fucking fantastic on you.” he snarled against your neck. “I want you constantly so fucking bad.” your legs tightened around him, giving him a gentle squeeze as your walls constricted around him, drawing out a louder groan from Gojo. “Oooh fuck, fuck, fuck~!!” you could feel him twitching inside of you. His little grunts and whines against your skin had your walls, stomach, and heart fluttering at the sound of his voice. “Fucck~ baby—haaah fuck yeah, keep squeezing me like that! Just like that!”

The head of his cock presses perfectly against your g-spot, making your eyes roll back, a telling sign that you are close. Gojo was thankful for this because he wasn’t sure if he’d be able to last any longer. He sped up his movements, slamming into you, making you scream into the palm of his hand. That erotic sound pushed him further, making him move faster, harder, fucking you with all of his strength, and being the strongest allowed him to lose all his control. He was fucking you so good. The literal wall behind you shook under the force of his thrusts.

The combination of his monstrous thrusts had cock you squirting as you cried out against his hand. Your orgasm had soaked his uniform shirt and boxers with your release. Feeling you cum so hard left Gojo growling as he bucked even harder. Thick ropes of cum filled you, and he didn’t stop there. He kept going, fucking his cum further into you, pushing it as deep as it would go until he finally stopped. His breath tingled over your skin as he slowly pulled away, smiling drunkenly at you.

“Fuck sweetheart that— sweetie? Babe?” he chuckled as your head fell forward, hitting his shoulder. “You good there?”

“I-If I knew you finding my nudes would lead to you fucking me like that, I would’ve shown them to you sooner.”

“Them—?” his voice was very soft, but his cock twitched hard inside of you. “You have more of them?” the instant Gojo found out about the whole hidden album that was on your phone full of your nudes and private videos. He dropped the veil and teleported you back to the apartment. Seeing all your pictures and videos would be worth the lecture he’d be getting from Yaga the following day.

Geto Suguru:

The days that Geto got home early from a mission or some of his favorite days. These were the days he got to take a hot shower, sleep in his bed, and see you again. Whenever he was away from you from your home, he felt like a part of him was missing

When he walked into your shared apartment, he felt all the tension in his shoulders melt away. The familiar smell of homemade aches and pains vanished as if Shoko had healed him. God, he’d love getting home early. What would have made coming home even better would have been if you had been here with him. But from the side of your slippers by the door, it was apparent that you were still stuck at work.

Suguru had about three hours before you gave him more than enough time to shower, take a nap, and do the laundry. That way, whenever you did get home tonight, all you would need to worry about was cuddling with him on the couch. Geto did everything in that exact order, and by the time the last load had been folded, you texted him that you were on your way home with dinner.

Knowing that you would be coming home soon, I encouraged Suguru to move faster, hang up the laundry, and throw his boxers in his drawer before opening yours to put your folded panties inside. He was putting away your bras when an envelope underneath the lacy fabric caught his gaze. He had put your clothes away multiple times, but he had never seen that shoved there before.

Was it wrong to look at the contents hidden at the bottom of your underwear drawer? Maybe. Was it going to stop him from looking? No way in hell.

When he freed the trap envelope from under your flimsy sets, he was pleased to see his name written over it in your handwriting. It seems as though you wanted him to find this. Plop down on the edge of the bed, open it, seeing photos inside. They were Polaroids from small squares with black backs, white frames, and a glossy finish. Flipping them over, Suguru tried to think if you both owned the Polaroid, but all those thoughts went tumbling out the window as he stared at the pictures in his hand. Whether you owned the Polaroid camera or not didn’t matter to him.

All he cared about was the nude photos of you; he held his hands.

You were in different positions in the show, sprawled out on the bed, the blanket doing nothing to cover you. Well, other photos are arranged from you sitting on your knees, back slightly arched, pushing your breasts out to you facing down on the bed, the camera pointing at your face. Seeing you so naked, looking at the camera with a sultry expression, had all of the blood from Geto’s head went rushing to the head of his cock.

Why the hell were you hiding this from him? Was this a little treat for him after a mission, or did you want to get him all riled up?

Suguru didn’t have to wait for the answer because the front door opened as soon as he put the pictures down on the bed. “Sugu, I’m home!” You barely managed to put your keys in the bowl near the front door when your boyfriend rushed out of the room, his dark hair flowing behind him. “Welcome back; I picked up your favorite Zaru Soba good—aggh!!” Suguru scooped you up, putting you over his shoulder before rushing back to the bedroom.

Your boyfriend didn’t say anything as he threw you onto the mattress. You swallowed hard, sitting up on your elbows, only to have him reach down, ripping open your uniform jacket. Buttons went flying across the room as you fell back against the mattress. Your perfect breasts bounced the confines of your shirt, making your horny boyfriend feral.

“S-Sugu!”

“Found your pictures—”

Was all he said before tugging your shirt over your head, his hands frantically pushing down your pants as he worked at his gray sweatpants. “Fuck you look so pretty in them.” Pictures? Oh God, you found the images you had taken for your anniversary with him?! You found yourself wishing that the mattress would open up and swallow you whole so you could avoid the embarrassment that was itching at the back of your skull.

“T-Th—ahh~” his lips moved expertly over your collarbone while his hands gently squeezed your breasts, pushing your shirt up enough that allowed him to tag your bra down, freeing them. “S-Sugu—those—w-were—”

“Exactly what I needed.”

Your photos may have been what he needed to get his motors going. Or maybe you were the stress relief he needed after a very annoying mission. Your pictures were the fuel that he needed to destroy you.

Drool seeped out of the corner of your mouth as Suguru grabbed a handful of your hair, forcing your face down into the mattress as he fucked you from behind. Your back was arched, ass sticking up, allowing him to slide in deep. You loved this position; it felt so good to be manhandled like this.

His long, thick fingers dug into your hair, pulling you up just an inch and allowing you to take a deep breath before your face shoved back into the comforter. You cried your hips against his cock, forcing him deeper inside of you. As you did, the other sounds besides the slapping of skin, your moans and his, the clicking of the Polaroid camera he held in his hands.

“Fuuck~ yeah~ fuck yourself. Rock your hips back against my cock Princess.” Suguru watched as your weekly whimpered, rocking your hips back pathetically slow and allowing him to snap a few pictures. “Ooh fuck.” he hissed through his teeth, grabbing the developing film, shaking it before his hips picked up his pace again, slamming into you, forcing your face back into the bedding. “Gonna keep that one in my wallet.”

“S-Sugu~! Haaah fuck!”

“Yeah, do you like the idea of that? Me having a nasty photo of you in my wallet?” He pulled back an inch, taking another photo of his cock wet with your arousal, the tip still buried inside of your wet cunt. “ only you know that was in there. And you would be the only one to know that when I’m on a mission and at a hotel alone. You’re pretty pictures are what I’m stroking my cock to at night.”

“Hnngh!” You sobbed, fingers digging into the sheets, as you tried your best to rock back against him, chasing your orgasm that was coiling deep in your abdomen. “Oh fuck I’m gonna cum!”

“Yeah, do it~ cum all over this fat fucking cock, baby~ make a mess.”

The orgasm snapped like a rubber band deep in your tummy. Your toes curled as you screamed as loud as your lungs would allow into your pillow. Suguru sucked in a breath, Following your body that collapsed on the bed, his hips still frantically moving against the fat of your ass, chasing his release that came just as fast and hard.

“Fuck~ oooh fuck yes baby! Cumming~ cummin’!”

Geto continued fucking you, not once slowing down, until he fully pulled out of you, loud pop echoing off the walls. You weakly protested as he repositioned your back arched ass out, you already knew what he was doing, but your body just wanted to slump back onto the mattress and fall asleep. But this was what your boyfriend wanted to do, and seeing that your pictures were the reason for his horny desires, let him do what he wanted if you listen to several clicks from the Polaroid behind you.

“Fuck—” Suguru whispered, shaking the photo as he set the camera aside, pulling you onto his chest. “This is Playboy material, babes.” he had the picture between his pointer and middle finger, turning it for you to see the photo he had captured of his cum running out of your pussy.

Seeing such an intimate photo of yourself like that didn’t leave you feeling dirty or embarrassed in any way, shape, or form. Instead, it had you feeling the returning burning desire in your stomach. And while your boyfriend, the pictures he had taken, adding to your collection. Suguru was so entranced he nearly missed the sensation of your soft kisses trailing down his stomach.

“Excuse me,” he scoffed, setting the pictures to the side. Just what do you think you’re doing there, princess?”

“Cleaning up my mess~ get the camera ready. I want you to take a lot of pictures. That way, I can reference what I have to do to improve my technique.” Suguru wanted to chuckle, but when you dragged your tongue over the underside of his cock, his eyes rolled back as he weakly searched for the camera that was on the side of his bed. He loved coming home early.

Nanami Kento

“Ken! Baby, I think something is wrong with my laptop!” you say before dramatically hitting the keyboard.“It’s banging for me to put it out of its misery. I think it’s finally time that I retire this guy.”

“Huh, it’s not that old model.” You pouted as your husband took your laptop from before you and plopped it down on his lap as he began typing at the computer. He looked as though he was some hacker from one of those cheesy nineties movies. “If you would keep it up-to-date like I’ve told you to do multiple times, you wouldn’t have this issue every time you opened it.”

“I hate waiting��”

“You need patience in your life; it can make things go a lot smoother for you in the long run.”

You puffed out your cheeks, knowing very well that your husband had always been right. You needed to take more time to find solace in your life. Maybe one of these days you would be able to do that. Today was not one of those days, though. You need to get on your laptop and finish the report, or your boss will surely give you an earful the following day.

“Yaga will kill me if I don’t get this report to him by the end of the day. Kento baby, what am I going to do? I’m too fragile to go up against, Yaga!”

Kento laughs, looking at you over the bridge of his glasses. “You and I both know you are more than capable of taking them out. Give yourself more credit, Love.” You appreciated your husband's honesty, but that didn’t help you with your current situation.

“Kento, that’s not gonna help me with my report.”

“Love of my life, it’s an easy fix. Just use my laptop while I try to get this up-to-date for you.”

Nanami rolled his eyes as you smothered kisses alongside his cheek. “Oh my god, thank you! I love you so much!” You grabbed your husband’s laptop and went to work on your report. Well, he clicked and tapped more gently at your keyboard than you had before.

He was able to update your system. The wheel constantly turned on your screen while he sipped on his wine. Nanami made a mental note to show you how to do this yourself once your report was submitted to Yaga; as your screen returned to life, it didn’t open on your lock screen, which was usually a picture of the two of you on your wedding day. Your laptop had decided to open up right where you had left it two nights before.

It was still a picture of you, but it was from your boudoir photo shoot for your wedding. Nanami choked on his wine as he stared at the screen, his cheeks flushing, and all the tips of his ears burned as he stared at the most intimate pictures he had ever seen. Pictures you had yet to show him after three months of being married.

The intimate photos of you are done so tastefully. Most range from different positions, like lying on a couch in your robe with your veil on. While the other was of you slipping your wedding dress on the backs, nagging against the fat of your ass, showing off the pretty lacy white underwear you had been wearing. But the photo that had Nanami choking was of you on your knees, your wedding veil falling over the swells of your bare breasts as your hands covered your nipples. Your eyes narrowed, staring at the camera while your lips parted slightly. Seeing you like that made him try to inhale his wine, which ended poorly for him.

“Oh! Did it go down the wrong pipe?” You asked, putting his laptop down. “At least it's white wine and not red. Red wine stains are bitch to get out of the carpet.” You stood up from your spot, stretching your arms above your head. “I'll go get you rag quick.”

You barely moved two steps before your husband was following after you. “Why didn’t you show me the pictures from your boudoir photo shoot?”

“Oh! Well, I didn’t care for how some of them came out, so I decided to pick through my favorites before I showed you. Why do you ask?”

Nanami didn’t need to answer your question because you got your answer the second your eyes darted toward your laptop. And, of course, he was looking at one of the pictures you even had a chance to look through. You just stared at the photo of yourself before running a hand down your face.

“They’re terrible, I know. I should’ve never let Shoko convince me to do it.”

Nanami gently took your hand, leading to the front of his pants. He placed your fingers over the hard bulge that was throbbing. You swallowed hard, glancing up at your husband, who was blushing just as much as you, and his very physical reaction twitched, letting you know that your husband liked the photos from your sexy photo shoot.

“I like them; I like them a lot.”

“I can tell,” you whispered, brushing your fingers over his erection through his pants. “Ken, you're so hard.”

“T-Th-hhngh photo.” he jerked his head toward your laptop, “really caught my attention.”

“Oh, it did?”

“Yes.”

Looking back at your screen, you truly took in the side of your photo. Your photographer had shot the picture in black-and-white, giving it a certain elegance despite the horny look in your eyes. You remembered asking for that specific pose for your husband. But in reality, it was for you.

You pushed Nanami back against the bed with a smirk. “Is there a reason why that picture cut your attention?” He huffed a sigh, blushing a darker shade as he watched you rub your cheek over the bulge.

“I like it because I love it when you’re on your knees for me, sucking my cock.”

Your fingers wrapped around his buckle, unfastening it. “Can I let you in on a little secret?” Nanami nodded, growling as you tucked his pants down. “That’s why I asked for her to take that specific picture. Because I know how much you love me on my knees for you.” You pressed kisses along his shaft from the base to the tip, your tongue ding over the pre-cum that was seeping through the fabric

“O-Oh—”

“Let me demonstrate.”

Your demonstration continued for what seemed like an eternity in heaven. Nanami gently stroked your hair as you slid your lips up and down, taking his cock further into your mouth. "Ohh fuck yes, those photos of you looked so good, baby girl. Makes me wanna devour you~" Kento gently grabbed the top of your head, pulling you forward until his cock slid across your tongue, hitting the back of your throat.

You hummed around him, wrapping your hand around the base of his cock before bobbing your head slowly up and down over him. Staring into the sea of lust, your eyes looked like how they had at done with the camera during your photo shoot. That submissive pose, the faux innocence in your eyes, was precisely what Nanami loved about this position.

"Ohh fuck. Perfect little mouth just for me, huh?”

You moaned in approval as you bobbed your head. Nanami was the perfect husband. If he was going to praise the photo of you, he felt like you didn’t look good, and he would get a treat. He was so kind, sweet, and considerate to you, so if you were able to spoil him once in a while as a thank you for all of his sweet words and for providing for you, you would not hesitate at the chance to do so.

Kento pushed you back by your forehead, groaning softly. "Fuck, you look so pretty~" He growled before thrusting into your mouth, his balls slapping against your chin. You whined around him, looking up at him into his eyes as he fucked your mouth. You could feel yourself getting wet on every ball of your head. He moaned low in his chest, looking back into your eyes. "Oh. I know that look~ You want me to make love to don't you honey?” Your eyes snapped wide as you blushed deeply. “Good girl~ Once I use your throat, then I'll fuck you like you need, darling~" Kento groaned, speeding up his hips.

Your eyes watered, streams of black trailing down your cheeks as he fucked your throat slowly. Watching him slowly lose control made your finger twitch as you slowly reached down, rubbing yourself. God, you loved him, and you loved how he made you feel!

"Ah-ah. What did I just say, Love. let me cum down your throat firat, then your pussy can feel good. I want to spoil you for being—ah—such a good girl.” He purred, speeding up slightly before stiffening as your tongue wrapped expertly around him, massaging his shaft in time with the bobbing of your head. “F-Fuck! Yes, j-just l-like t-th-hhngh! Haa! Fuck!” Kento snarled before cumming in your mouths, face fucking you through it.

With each spurt that filled your mouth, you eagerly swallowed it, only pulling off of him when Kemto was whimpering from the overstimulation. As you sat on your knees, licking your lips, Nanami watched you through half-lidded eyes. His lips slightly parted as he did something he had never done before. He pulled his cell phone out and held it directly in front of your face.

“Ken?”

“Stick your tongue out. Show me how you swallowed it all.” without arguing, you did as your husband asked, sticking your tongue out. As you did, he snapped a few pictures before growling and zooming in on each. “Fuck you're so beautiful.” He sighed, admiring his photos for one other second before he placed his phone down on the couch before yanking you up onto the sofa and flinging your panties off.

“Ah! K-Kento, what are you doing??!”

“You being on your knees in front of me might be one of your favorite positions.” He growled as he nipped and sucked on your inner thighs. “Well, one of my favorite positions is right here, between your thighs so sit back and relax, my love. I’ll take very good care of you.” You squealed as his tongue ran over your sensitive clit, before arching you back, eagerly bucking across his mouth.

Note to self: Get Shoko a pack of cigarettes and a bottle of wine for booking the boudoir photographer for you!

Forever Tag List:

@darkstarlight82 @pandoness @nealeart @simp-plague @sugurubabe @chilichopsticks @reap3erslov3 @wil10wthetree @luvsymai

[kiarastromboli]

Teach me 4 (Chris Sturniolo x y/n)

Part. 1 Part.2 Part.3

Mesterlist.

Warning: Bit of angst, Smut content, don’t like it = don’t read it :)

Summary: Two years have passed since Chris and Y/N's breakup. Many things have changed, but apparently not the feelings Y/N has for Chris. But how will her return to Boston for the summer holidays unfold when she knows she hasn't moved on?

Note : I'm sorry for making you wait so long for this fourth part. I just wanted to make sure I did it right. Despite everything, I'm still afraid this part won't please you as much, and I apologize if the result isn't what you expected. I did my best.

•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•

"Julia, stop, that's enough," I said, bursting into laughter at the excited screams of my best friend on the other end of the line.

"Stop?? It's been almost 2 years since we last saw each other, y/n. How do you expect me to keep calm when I'm going to see you in less than 24 hours?" She said, overexcited, and I could hear her fidgeting in every direction.

Indeed, it had been a while since I left Boston. After my parents sent me to the other side of the country, I started researching universities nearby. At the end of high school, I wasted no time in enrolling and starting my studies.

I had successfully completed my first year at the university, and now it was summer vacation. My parents agreed to let me return to Boston to enjoy my break with them and my friends.

As for my relationship with my parents... Let's say things are different, but the distance imposed on us did me good. I had finally started to live for myself, and many things had changed in my life. As for them, they were content because my results were excellent, and they could see that I had gained autonomy and maturity since my departure.

Anyway, two years had passed, and my life had changed a lot, but I was so happy to finally be back in Boston.

"Yeah, I know," I said, chuckling. "I can't wait to see you and the others," I said, turning around to lie on my back in my bed.

"We'll have to organize a party for your return!" Julia screamed in my ears.

"No, Ju, please, that's enough," I said, moving the phone away from my ear a bit, which she had just shattered again.

"Huh huh, anyway, you don't have a choice. Mom's not here for 3 days, and it's perfect for the party we're going to have when you get back!" She said, emphasizing the word 'party.'

"Juliaaaa!" I said, sighing. "Who are you even planning to invite to this party? It's not like I had a hundred friends back in high school," I said, laughing.

"We don't care, y/n. Who would refuse a party in a big house during summer vacation? I'll invite our group of friends and then check with the old art group from high school." She started to say, "Oh, and why not the football team! And the lacrosse team and the school mascot! Oh my god, I wonder if he still has his costume; that would be hilarious!" She said, laughing.

The Lacrosse team, Chris.

From that moment on, my mind went on pause, and I didn't really pay attention to what Julia was saying.

It had been so long since I had heard about him. After my departure, I hadn't received any news from him. And it was my fault. Every time Julia tried to talk to me about him, I immediately shut down. I thought with time the pain would fade, but it was false. Four months after my departure, my heart still bled as much as the last time he passed by my window. I had done everything to stop thinking about him and turn the page, and I had done it so well that I almost forgot that by returning to Boston, I would also be returning to him.

"Y/n, are you listening?" Julia said, raising her voice, bringing me back to reality.

"Huh? What? Sorry, Julia, I'm exhausted. I think I need to rest for tomorrow; the journey will be long. Can I call you back later?" I said, stuttering a bit, still destabilized by my thoughts.

"Yeah, sure, don't worry. See you tomorrow. Love you, bye," she said warmly.

"Love you, bye," I said with a small smile before hanging up and placing my phone next to me.

Chris.

Is it normal that my heart still bleeds so much for a high school crush? Am I just too sensitive? Is it because he's the only man I've ever let into my heart until now?

Questions kept piling up in my mind, and no matter how much I shook my head, they wouldn't leave me.

Anxiety eventually took over the excitement. What will happen if we see each other again? Will we even meet? Does he still think about me too? Is his heart still bleeding as well? Did he drown in sorrow when our story ended?

More and more questions. I better close my eyes; tomorrow is a big day...

_______

My morning passed extremely quickly. I woke up a bit late, so I was in a hurry. I got ready quickly, gathered my things, and said goodbye to my roommate not to miss my flight.

My parents picked me up at the airport, and I didn't expect warm hugs, but it was still hurtful to barely get a 'how are you?' The whole ride to the house was filled with discussions about my results and how my life was going there.

It had been a while since I saw them, so I just decided to suck it up, smile, and play the perfect little girl I always portrayed in Boston.

"No, I'm just saying that just because your results are satisfactory doesn't mean you don't need extra courses, you know, those things look good on your record," my mother continued to ramble when we finally arrived home.

God, this journey felt longer than my high school years!

"Yeah, I know, Mom. I'll think about it; can we discuss it later? I'm tired," I said before leaving the car.

Once my suitcase was unpacked, I thought I would have a moment of respite to finally collapse into my bed and rest from this exhausting start to the day. But that was without counting on the stormy arrival of my best friend.

"Y/NNNNN!!!" she screamed, rushing towards me to hug me.

With fatigue and confusion, it took me a few seconds to realize it was indeed her standing in front of me, and suddenly, I felt overwhelmed by my emotions. Tears started to well up, blurring my vision.

"Oh my god, Ju'!" I said, stammering and nervously laughing.

"If you start crying, you know I'll cry too, so stop that right now," she warned me, furrowing her brows not to start crying herself.

"Sorry, sorry!" I said, chuckling and wiping my eyes. "I missed you so much!!" I said, shaking my hands before hugging her again.

I spent the rest of my day with her, talking about everything that had changed in my life since my departure, and for the first time in a long time, I felt genuinely good.

I felt like I was recharging, regaining all the positive energy I had been missing.

"Anyway, you know me; I wasn't going to let a jerk like him talk to me like that. So, I preferred to end our relationship, and it's for the best!" Julia told me.

She had just told me about her latest relationship with one of the lacrosse team players from our high school, and as usual, I couldn't help but think of him.

"Are you sure everything's okay, y/n? Since I started talking about Tom, I feel like you're not really here anymore?" she asked, concerned.

"No! Well, yes, it's okay; don't worry. It's just that—" I began to say before cutting myself off with a sigh. "It's nothing; it's just my return here made me rethink everything that happened before I left," I confessed.

"You mean what happened with Chris?" she said, giving me a sympathetic look. "Sorry, I know we're not supposed to talk about him. Excuse me, I forgot—" she added before I interrupted her.

"No, Julia, it's fine; it's okay. I'm better; I assure you it doesn't bother me anymore," I lied, smiling and grabbing her hand. "I'm better, I promise it doesn't bother me anymore," I lied.

"You know I love you," she said, smiling and squeezing my hand.

"Yeah, I know, I love you too," I replied, chuckling.

After this little discussion, Julia stayed overnight at my place. I eventually gave in and agreed to have the party at her house.

Deep down, I had a bit of hope to come across Chris. I know I shouldn't, but it's stronger than me...

I mean, I would like to know what he's become. Has he continued with lacrosse? Did he go to university? Or has he found a job he's passionate about? Does he still smoke? Has he rebuilt his life with other girls after me?

In a way, I wanted to know to reassure myself that he was doing better and that what I did didn't hurt him too much.

But on the other hand, selfishly, I hoped he had waited for me, that he hadn't seen other girls, and that he was still hoping, just like me, that one day we would meet again.

And God, I know how contradictory it is of me to hope for that when that night I made it clear to him that there would be no chance of things working out. But no matter how much I fought against what I wanted, I knew that my heart was still in his hands, and his alone.

I hate myself for being so stupid and not being able to move on, even though it was just a relationship between two completely lost teenagers for a few weeks.

But I had never experienced anything so genuine. Every conversation, every look, every caress, and every kiss haunt me...

They're still there in a corner of my mind, even though I try to push them away and tell myself it's for the best. My soul screams at me to find his. Maybe that was my punishment—for making him believe that our story could last, for making him believe that the girl he truly loved existed when it wasn't the case.

_________

"Are you sure it doesn't bother you that the lacrosse team is here tonight?" Julia asked me for the hundredth time today.

After our little pajama party at my place last night, we went to her place in the afternoon to prepare for the party tonight.

We were finishing getting ready, and people were supposed to arrive any minute.

"Ju', as I've repeated to you throughout the day, it's fine, it doesn't bother me. And besides, if you don't invite the lacrosse team, what excuse will you find to invite your little Tom and make him regret it?" I said mockingly to tease her.

"Ahaha, very funny. You know very well that I would have found a way, one way or another, to make him regret it!" she added, giving me a playful punch on the shoulder, making me chuckle.

"No, more seriously, y/n, if you're not ready to see Chris tonight, I don't mind kicking the lacrosse team out of the party," she added, becoming serious again.

I sighed before responding, "You know, anyway, I can't ignore him for the rest of my life."

"Julia, I know you're worried about me, but it's behind me, I promise it'll be fine," I reassured her with a reassuring smile.

She began to open her mouth to reply, but she was interrupted by the sound of the doorbell at the entrance.

"Well, it looks like the party is about to start!" she said all hysterical, and I followed her downstairs to welcome the first people.

In the span of thirty minutes, the house filled with teenagers ready to have a blast.

There were mostly people from our old high school; we barely knew half of them, but as Julia had told me, no one refuses a party in a big house like hers during the summer vacation.

It quickly turned into chaos; people were absolutely everywhere, and bottles of alcohol were aplenty, but still no sign of Chris on the horizon.

The party was in full swing; it was almost midnight, and in my despair of not seeing Chris show up, I ended up giving in and joining the game like everyone else, downing drinks one after another, which was not really in my usual habits.

Maybe it was better this way; the more alcoholic beverages passed through my throat, the less Chris haunted my mind. After all, maybe that was my solution.

"Oh, shit, sorry!" I said, bumping into a guy with my head down, making him drop his phone.

I bent down to pick it up before him, and when I raised my head, I came face to face with a face I knew all too well.

"Y/n?" the tall brunet said, looking surprised.

It took me a few seconds to realize it was indeed Matt in front of me.

Chris's brother...

"Oh my god, Matt," I said, surprised. "You're the last person I expected to see tonight!" I said, chuckling.

"And I thought you were on the other side of the country!" he said, also chuckling before opening his arms to hug me.

"What are you doing here?" he asked once our embrace was over.

If I had been a little more sober, this situation would probably have worried me, but at the moment, I was just happy to see him. Matt and I had spent very little time together, but just enough for meeting him at this party to make me super happy.

"I came back for the holidays," I replied, smiling.

"Oh, that's great," he said, smiling too. "You could have at least let us know!" he added, laughing.

"Hey, relax, I just arrived yesterday," I said, rolling my eyes.

Our conversation quickly ended, giving way to an awkward silence. So, without really thinking, I asked him the first question that came to my mind, "Did you come alone ?"

"Oh, um..." he began to say before taking a pause, as if he didn't really know if he should continue or not. "No, I came with my brothers," he said, clearing his throat and running his hand over his neck.

Chris is here.

Suddenly, everything clicked in my head; it was obvious how stupid my question was.

My head started spinning; alcohol seemed to take hold of me even more. It was as if realizing he was there for real had suddenly spiked my blood alcohol level.

"Are you okay, y/n?" he said, placing his hand on my shoulder, looking worried as he saw me pale.

"Um, yeah - yeah, don't worry, I'm just - I've had a bit to drink, you know, it's not really my thing!" I said with a nervous laugh, trying to hide my distress at the moment.

"Do you want me to get you a glass of water? Or something else? I'm sorry if it's me who put you in this state by talking about—" he started to say before I cut him off.

"No! - Matt, it's fine, everything's okay, it's not your fault. I'm just, I just need some fresh air, that's all," I added.

"Um, okay, do you want me to come with you?" he asked, and I could feel how uncomfortable he felt for me at that moment, and that was really the last thing I wanted.

"That's really nice, Matt, but it's okay, thank you. I'll be fine," I told him with a smile before walking towards the exit.

As I moved through the crowd, I prayed not to run into Chris. I didn't want to see him. I thought I was ready and that it was what I needed, but the state I am in right now proves otherwise.

Fuck this shit, I'm going to need more alcohol for sure to handle this.

In my rush towards the exit, I grabbed the first bottle of alcohol I saw lying around, whiskey - it couldn't get any harder.

Damn, will I ever manage to move on? Am I destined to feel like this for the rest of my days?

Finally reaching the front door, I felt my eyes fill with tears, making my vision completely blurry.

Once outside on the porch, I placed the bottle on the small coffee table there, sat on the outdoor couch, and allowed a few tears to flow.

I could hear the muffled sound of music inside, and paradoxically, the cicadas and the silence of the night outside.

A few minutes ago, I was fine, happy, enjoying the party with my friends, and it took me going back to thinking about him to ruin everything.

Physically, I wasn't doing that bad; I didn't feel the need to vomit or anything. I just had a bit of a spinning head and trouble standing up.

Mentally, though, it was a different story.

My sobbing was interrupted by a noise coming from a little further in the garden.

I raised my head with a start to scan the surroundings, wiping away my tears. I especially didn't want anyone to see the only girl crying at this party. I was already not considered a cool girl at school, but this would have been the icing on the cake.

There shouldn't be anyone outside; Julia had made it clear that she didn't want anyone in her mom's garden.

I spotted a silhouette in the dark, and eventually, I caught the smell of a joint. So, I sighed before getting up to get closer.

"Get out of here, idiot! Julia doesn't want anyone in her garden. It's not that complicated to follow such a simple rule," I shouted at the stranger, rolling my eyes.

He approached me until he reached the point where the porch light could illuminate him.

I took a step back, completely thrown off when I recognized his face.

"Sorry, I just got here. I didn't know we weren't allowed to hang out in the garden," he replied softly, keeping a reasonable distance from me.

"Chris?" that's all that could come out of my mouth at that moment; I was completely bewildered. What was I supposed to do at that moment?

My tears started to flow again, and I couldn't do anything to stop it.

Chris stood there, not saying anything. He was as lost as I was at that moment, but I could see that seeing me cry was far from a pleasant thing for him.

He seemed hesitant, shook his head, and muttered to himself, rolling his eyes, "Fuck this."

The next moment, he took me into his arms, letting my head rest against his chest. It was as if he understood without me needing to express myself.

I broke down, letting my tears flow; that's what I needed—his arms around me. He held me tight, and I simply didn't want this moment to end. With my right hand, I clung to his t-shirt as if my life depended on it.

"Y/n, shhhh," he whispered, caressing my hair when my breathing became irregular due to my sobs.

I couldn't breathe; I felt suffocated. The more tears that fell, the worse it got, but, on the other hand, it felt good. All these emotions I had buried, all these tears I had prevented from flowing, were finally coming out.

"Y/n, calm down," he said, grabbing my cheeks with his hands and bringing his face to mine to look me in the eyes.

"Hey, look at me, look at me, breathe, everything's fine," he reassured me, stroking my cheek with his thumb.

"I-I'm so—" I tried to speak, but I couldn't stop crying.

"I'm so sorry, Chris," I said with a broken and fragile voice, shaking my head.

"Y/n, it's okay, stop," he said, pinching his lips, and I could see tears welling up in his eyes, despite his efforts to suppress them.

"What I did—" I started, trying to calm down, "what I did to you—I had no right to do that. I'm sorry, Chris," I said, letting my head fall once again against his chest and starting to cry even harder.

"Y/n," he said, seizing my face again to look at me, "Y/n, I’m not mad at you. Look at me, I'm fine, everything's fine; it's behind us."

"It's not behind me, Chris," I told him, shaking my head and stepping back.

"It's not behind me at all. It continues to eat me up inside every day! I tried for two years!" I told him with a forced laugh, wiping my tears. "Two years, Chris, two years trying everything to get you out of my head and to stop hoping that things would go back to normal!" I added.

"Y/n—" he said, passing his hand over his face before I cut him off.

"How can you not resent me after what I did to you!?" I said, completely lost.

"Because that's life, y/n!" he said, raising his voice and advancing towards me.

"Because people come in and out of your life, tearing your heart out against their will!" he added, and I just closed my mouth; I didn't expect him to express himself like this.

"Y/n, I could have chosen to hate you, yes, it's true! I could have chosen to keep acting like an idiot and keep destroying myself slowly, as I did in the first months after you left!" he continued to say, carried away by his emotions.

"But what would it have served? What would it have served to keep making the same mistakes all my life?" he asked, and I simply nodded, dumbfounded.

"Y/n, I tried to hate you to make the pill go down more easily, believe me. But how could I hate a girl like you?" he asked, tears in his eyes.

"How could I hate the only woman who managed to open my heart and show me that there's always hope?" he continued, this time advancing towards me, and my heart started racing in my chest.

"I got my act together because you deserved someone better. You deserved to know that I was doing well, and I knew! Believe me, I knew how much you blamed yourself," he said, wiping my tears.

"That night when you told me straight in the eyes that you no longer loved me and that you no longer believed in us, I knew you were lying to protect me," he said, and I felt tears flowing again.

"You lied to me to protect me without even thinking about yourself. You put me before you, where no one had done it before," he continued, tapping his chest.

"Chris—" I said with a weak voice.

"No, I don't blame you, y/n. I don't blame you because I know you simply didn't have the choice to do that," he said, wiping my tears.

"And these last two years, I lived in doubt because I wasn't sure 100%, but when I saw your gaze on this porch, all my doubts flew away, and now I know," he said, plunging his eyes into mine.

I looked into his eyes; I had managed to regain normal breathing, and everything he had just told me had calmed my heart.

The open wound in my chest, bleeding and letting all my distress pour out, was closing.

I didn't know what to add; I didn't know what to say to him. It felt like a million things were happening in my mind, but what could it possibly mean?

And then my thoughts escaped my mind, fixating on his blue eyes, his pure eyes, his sincere gaze fixed on me.

I had forgotten how beautiful this man was.

I became aware of his warm hands on my cheeks; my heartbeat quickened, and I thought I saw a glint of desire growing in his eyes.

The silence became heavy, yet neither of us wanted to say anything.

Our faces slowly approached, and my eyes juggled between his and his lips.

What was happening? Was it supposed to be good? Or bad?

I wanted to throw myself at him, yes, but was it correct? Was it the alcohol? Did I misinterpret what was happening?

"Chris—" I said in a soft, almost inaudible voice before he closed the gap between our lips.

Shivers ran through my entire body; it was soft and so good.

His soft lips moved perfectly against mine.

One of his hands resting on my cheek slid down to the small of my back.

Meanwhile, my two hands found their place on his chest, and our kiss deepened.

This kiss, originally meant to say ‘welcome home’, quickly became more profound.

Our tongues collided; things escalated. The hand that rested on my waist descended to grip my hip, while one of my hands left his chest to settle on the side of his neck.

I felt something reignite in me, something I hadn't felt in a very long time: desire.

I became aware of what was happening, and I snapped out of this trance by stepping back and opening my eyes.

I caught my breath before telling him, "Chris."

"I'm sorry," he said, catching his breath too.

"We can't do this; we can't revisit this. I'm back in Boston only for the holidays," I said, shaking my head, trying to think of something else.

"Sorry, I don't know what came over me; I shouldn't have." he said, running his hand through his hair.

"It's okay," I said, stepping towards him and placing my hand on his shoulder.

"I just found you again when I didn't think I'd have this chance; I want to do things right," I confessed.

"So, does that mean we're friends now?" he asked, and his question tore at my heart because, of course, I didn't want to be just friends. But things were too complicated for us to allow anything more.

"Yes, it means we're friends," I said, smiling slightly, and he returned a smile.

"I missed you," he said, hugging me.

"Missed you too," I replied, "feels like it's been ages since we last caught up," I added, chuckling.

"You must have hundreds of things to tell me then," he said, separating and smiling.

"I don't want to spoil your evening with my stories; it can wait," I told him, running my hand through my nape.

"Y/n, I went out to smoke a joint alone because this party is really lame," he said, rolling his eyes, "so believe me, I'd rather sit here with you and listen to everything you have to tell me."

"Hey, it's my comeback night, you're not allowed to say it's lame!" I told him, offended, giving him a shoulder punch.

"Okay, okay, sorry!" he said, laughing, before sitting on the couch, and I followed suit.

He took a joint out of his pocket, and before lighting it, he turned to me. "Hmm, want some?"

"Oh no, thanks, I'll stick to this tonight," I said, grabbing the bottle I'd left on the small table.

"Whiskey?" he said, surprised, "who are you?" he joked.

"Shut up, idiot, I grabbed the first bottle I came across on my way here," I said, rolling my eyes.

The conversation flowed naturally between us; it was almost as if we had never been apart. Of course, in two years, both he and I had changed a lot, so it was a bit strange. However, that connection, that complicity we had, seemed intact.

I'm not sure how long we stayed on that porch, talking, but the bottle I had drunk was already half empty, and Chris must have been on his third joint since the beginning of our conversation.

"I can't believe you told him that!" Chris said, laughing.

"I warned you; I'm not the helpless little girl I used to be," I replied, chuckling and shrugging.

"Yeah, I saw that," he said, gradually stopping his laughter.

The silence returned, and I was lost in my thoughts, already quite tipsy and in a curious mood.

I had been hesitating for several minutes, debating whether to ask him a question. The more I drank, the more I wanted to ask, even though I knew it wasn't the best idea.

"Chris?" I finally said softly, breaking the silence.

"Hmm?" he simply replied, turning his head towards me.

"Can I ask you a question?" I asked him timidly.

"You just did," he said with a smirk.

"No, seriously, stop it!" I said, laughing and giving him a shoulder punch.

He straightened up, turning completely towards me, resting his head on his hand with his arm leaning against the top of the couch. "Seriously, I'm listening," he said, still with that sly smile.

His eyes were red and squinted because of the weed, and I won't lie, it made him quite sexy... or maybe I had had a bit too much to drink; what was I even saying?

"Have you dated other girls since we broke up?" I asked, instantly regretting it.

"Y/n—" he began before I cut him off.

"Sorry, that was a dumb question. I don't know what got into me," I said, hiding my face with my hands.

He chuckled at my action. "It's okay; I don't mind answering if you answer too..." he said, shrugging.

I removed my face from my hands to look up at him.

"But are you sure you really want to hear my answer?" he added.

I just nodded.

"I've slept with other girls, yes," he began, and I cut him off without thinking.

"How many?" I asked, sitting up.

"I don't really know, two or three, but they were just casual things, especially at the beginning when I needed to distract myself," he explained, feeling the need to justify himself.

"Okay... and why?" I asked.

"Why what?" he asked, confused.

"Why casual? In two years, you had plenty of time to find another amazing girl to be with. You can't make me believe that as the first one to fall for you, no other girl wanted you," I said, rolling my eyes.

"I didn't want to..." he confessed to me. "I— " he started before sighing, "I'm not sure if it's a good idea to explain why," he said, looking away.

"No, tell me; I want to know now," I urged him.

"Y/n," he said, looking me in the eyes.

"Chris, please, it's okay; we're just talking," I said, eager to know more.

"None of those girls were comparable to you," he admitted, "and I know it sounds silly, but it's just the truth. I couldn't get interested in those girls, and it wasn't their fault; they were interesting, and in another context, it might have worked with them," he said honestly.

"But my mind kept comparing them to you; none of them talked like you," he started saying, "none of them laughed like you," he added.

"None of them kissed like you," he said, looking at my lips, and I felt my panties dampen at that. Fuck.

"Every time I slept with another girl, I couldn't help but think of you, your body, and your moans," he said, lost in his thoughts.

"I couldn't stop thinking about how your lips wrapped so perfectly around me," he said, and I had to slightly open my mouth to get more air.

He shook his head, snapping back to reality. "Anyway, until now, I haven't been able to settle down with another girl because the only one I have in my mind is you," he said shyly.

I stared at him, mouth agape. I was dying to have him; everything he just told me had me way too excited.

"And you?" he asked, bringing me out of my thoughts.

"What?" I said, clearing my throat.

"And you, have you dated other guys?" he said, chuckling.

"Oh!" I said, blushing. "No, none," I replied timidly.

"None?" he repeated, surprised, and I simply shook my head from side to side.

"And how many guys have you slept with then?" he asked.

I took a moment to answer, embarrassed by the situation.

"Y/n, it's okay; you can tell me. I just told you mine!" he said, rolling his eyes.

"I-" I said before sighing and biting my lip, and he furrowed his brows.

"None..." I said softly.

His eyes widened at my response.

"Are you serious?" he asked to make sure.

"Stop it; you know very well that I'm not the type to sleep around," I said, feeling awkward.

"No, I know that; it's just hard for me to conceive that you've managed two years without sex," he said with a smirk.

"Wait, what does that mean?" I said, furrowing my brows.

"Y/n, when we were together, you played the innocent a lot, but you can't deny that you were just as horny as I was, if it’s not more…" he said, laughing.

"Chris!" I said, bringing my hand to my mouth before chuckling as well.

"No, I'm not saying it's a bad thing; on the contrary, it was something I loved about you," he said honestly.

"I even found it rather sexy..." he added, shrugging.

I squeezed my thighs together at that moment, and Chris noticed because I saw his eyes leave mine and land on my thighs.

"We should change the subject," I said, taking a deep breath and running my hands over my thighs, a bit embarrassed.

"Sorry, I didn't know it would have that effect on you," he said, unable to help but smile.

"It's okay," I said, biting my lip.

We looked at each other for a moment, both feeling a bit awkward.

His eyes briefly shifted to my chest, and that was the last straw for me.

Without thinking twice, I straddled him, immediately connecting our lips. He didn't waste a second to put his hands on my hips, making me moan.

He took the opportunity to slide his tongue into my mouth, and I started rocking my hips against him, making him groan in response.

His hands came to grip my hips to stop my movements, eliciting a frustrated groan from me.

"Y/n, this isn't right," he said, separating our lips.

"Chris, I don't care," I said, reconnecting our lips instantly. I was too hungry to stop there.

My hip movements resumed, and I could feel his erection through his jeans.

My hands were on his cheeks, and his hands firmly held my hips.

"You said we should do things right and that we were friends," he said, separating our lips again.

"Y/n, you've been drinking, and I don't want it to be something you regret tomorrow," he added.

"Some friends sleep together sometimes..." I said innocently, playing with his necklace.

He bit his lip and looked away. If there was one thing that could make this man weak, it was my way of acting innocently with him.

"Y/n," he said, closing his eyes and letting out a frustrated groan.

I knew I could make him crack; I just had to tease him enough.

I buried my head in his neck to kiss and leave a few love bites.

He tossed his head back to give me better access. "Fuck..." he whispered, and I slowly resumed my hip movements.

"Y/n, stop this," he said weakly, still with his fingers dug into my hips.

"Make me stop," I whispered in his ear before leaving a trail of kisses on his jawline.

"Y/n," he said in a firm voice this time, grabbing me by the neck to make me face him. "Don't play with my nerves like that."

"Chris, please," I said, gripping the wrist of the hand around my neck.

"I'm the one asking you. It's just a favor we're doing each other as friends," I said with a slight moan. "You help me fill the void I've felt for 2 years, and I give you the opportunity not to have to just imagine fucking me for once," I added.

"You said it yourself, no girl moans like me, no one kisses you like me, and their lips don't wrap around you as well as mine do," I continued to convince him.

"It's just a one-time thing. After that, I swear we'll be just friends for real, please, Chris, I need you," I pleaded.

I don't know if it was the alcohol or simply the lack of sex, but I never thought I'd be capable of saying such things to a guy in my life.

"Just a one-time thing?" he asked.

"Just a one-time thing," I replied, nodding.

"Fuck, this is so fucking wrong, y/n. What are you doing to me?" he said before kissing me again without removing his hand from my neck.

He slid his hand under my dress to grab my ass and massage it while helping me grind against him.

"Mmph, Chris," I moaned into our kiss.

"Shhhh," he said, slapping my ass.

I started pulling at his T-shirt to signal that I wanted him to take it off.

"Not here, princess," he said, smiling against my lips before separating them. "Stand up," he ordered, and I obeyed.

He stood up as well, firmly grabbing my hand before guiding us inside.

We quickly made our way through the crowd, passing by Nick, who tried to stop us, but Chris simply ignored him, too busy at that moment trying not to bend me over one of the tables in the house to fuck me in front of everyone.

We climbed the stairs, and Chris opened the first door he saw, which happened to lead to Julia's room. If she finds out about this, she's going to kill me.

He slammed the door shut behind us, making sure to lock it.

Then, he pressed me against that door, tightening his grip around my neck just enough to restrict the blood flow, causing my head to spin.

He wasted no time in forcefully removing my dress, it was so abrupt that he could have torn it if he wanted.

"Chris, be careful, take it easy," I said, chuckling, before he silenced me with yet another kiss.

"Don't ask me to fucking take it easy when you've spent the last 10 minutes teasing me on that damn couch, y/n," he said, removing his T-shirt.

He took off my bra, adding, "I fucking missed you."

The next moment, he slid his hands to the back of my thighs and lifted me, making me moan in surprise. It seemed like the hold he had on me back then hadn't changed.

He reconnected our lips, heading towards the bed where he tossed me, making me moan again from the sudden force.

"Chris," I sighed in a heated breath as I sat up, facing him at waist height.

But before I could reach for his belt to undress him, he violently pushed me back. "You'll move when I tell you to move. Have you forgotten your manners?" he said, a smirk playing on his lips.

His gaze was dark and intense; he could have threatened to kill me, and I would have moaned because of how much he affected me.

"Touch yourself," he ordered.

"What?" I said, feeling my face turn all red.

"Don't make me repeat myself; you heard me," he said authoritatively.

I swallowed hard before starting to take off my panties.

"I didn't tell you to remove your panties," he said, interrupting me.

"But—" I began to say before he cut me off.

"Is it so hard to be a good girl, Y/n? In two years, have you forgotten everything?" he said, shaking his head.

His words made me even wetter; I dreamed of one thing only: feeling him inside me.

"No, sorry," I said before starting to make circular motions on my clit through my panties.

He licked his lips, slowly removing his belt without taking his eyes off me.

"Stand up," he ordered.

Without hesitation, I stood up, still looking at him innocently in the eyes.

"You are so fucking beautiful, Y/n," he said, holding me by the chin.

His compliment made me immediately smile and blush.

"Your wrists," he asked, letting go of my chin, and I handed him my wrists.

With his belt, he tied my wrists together before kissing me.

He leaned towards me without breaking our lips to signal me to lie down on the mattress, which I did.

He separated our lips for a brief moment to press my arms above my head. "Don't move," he whispered before sliding his lips into my neck.

"My poor baby, I can't believe you've abstained for 2 years," he said before descending his kisses towards my chest.

"Now that I'm here, I'll take care of that for you, my princess," he said, circling one of my nipples with his lips to kiss it.

"Chris, please," I moaned, wriggling a bit.

"Shhhh, be patient, believe me, I won't stop there," he said before starting to descend his kisses towards my lower abdomen.

The closer he got to my thighs, the more I felt like I was losing my mind. It had been so long since I had felt that burning desire between my legs.

"Fuck, Chris, stop, please, I need you," I pathetically begged when he started to kiss my pussy through my panties.

He just chuckled at my pleas before removing my panties and diving his head between my legs.

He surrounded my clit with his lips, and I couldn't hold back the moans that escaped my mouth at that moment.

Lost in my own pleasure and especially completely carried away by the sensation of his tongue against me, I brought my two hands, still tied, to his hair to hold on.

He lifted his lips from me, making me raise my head towards him. "No, don't stop, Chris!" I said desperately.

"I told you not to move, Y/n," he reminded me, placing my hands back above my head.

"I'm sorry, I had—" I was interrupted in the middle of my sentence by his hands abruptly grabbing my waist to turn me over.

"What are you doing?" I said in a surprised moan when he grabbed my hips to put my ass in the air.

"This way, you'll have a much harder time moving," he said, and I could hear the smugness in his tone.

He kissed the base of my lower back, making me shiver, ensuring that my head remained pressed against the mattress below me.

He then placed a few kisses on my ass before resuming his work between my legs.

One of his hands kneaded my ass while he teased my entrance with the fingers of his other hand.

"Oh my—Chris," I said when he accelerated his tongue movements.

The sensation in my lower abdomen that I hadn't felt in so long was building up again; I was extremely close.

"C-Chris, I'm gonna cum," I moaned, burying my head in the pillow to try to muffle the sound of my moans.

"Give it to me, baby," he said, inserting two of his fingers into me and reconnecting his tongue to my clit.

"Fuck, Chris!" I exclaimed, feeling my legs tremble, and within seconds, my orgasm overwhelmed me.

Chris didn't detach his lips from me; he continued, and his fingers didn't slow down either. "Chris, I- I can't," I told him, breathless.

He detached himself from me at the sound of my words and turned me over again onto the mattress to kiss me.

I put my hands, still tied behind his neck, to bring him impossibly closer to me, which seemed to amuse him, judging by the way he smiled against my lips.

"You taste so fucking good, baby," he complimented me between our kisses, and I wrapped my legs around his waist.

I was still very sensitive, but I wanted more, I needed more.

So, I tightened my legs around his waist so that his erection pressed against my pussy.

"Are you that impatient?" he chuckled before reaching between our bodies to unbutton his pants, and I just nodded.

He straightened up to completely remove his pants and boxers before returning to position himself between my legs.

"If it hadn't been so long, I would've edged you for hours," he said, rubbing his tip against my thighs without entering.

"Chris, please, stop talking—" Before I could finish my sentence, he entered me without warning, making me moan in harmony with him.

"Oh my god, y/n, fuck, you're so—" I didn't let him finish his sentence, immediately capturing his lips in a passionate kiss.

He started moving inside me slowly, taking care to go all the way in with each thrust.

Our lips were still connected, our tongues perfectly synchronized—everything was perfect with him.

His pelvic movements accelerated, prompting me to throw my head back to moan once again.

"God, I'll never get tired of the sounds you make. Fuck, it's too good," Chris said, moaning as well, his head completely immersed in my neck, where he left fiery kisses.

"Chris—mmph," I started to speak but couldn't formulate my words correctly. Chris fucked me so well that I lost my words.

"What, baby? What do you want?" he said, seizing my chin to make me look into his eyes.

"I want to—fuck!" I said, moaning and closing my eyes. I felt him everywhere in me; it was too good.

"You can do it, sweetheart. Take your time," he said with a smirk, not slowing down.

"I want to touch you," I said, moaning again. "Please, Chris, I need to feel you," I begged.

He momentarily straightened up without pulling out to unfasten the belt around my wrists.

"Here you go, baby," he said in a soft voice before kissing me again.

This time, my hands went into his hair, neck, and back. I dug my nails into his back and biceps, completely controlled by my pleasure, and began to feel all these sensations invade me.

"Chris, oh my god, I'm so close!" I whined.

He sat up on his knees without pulling out. I moaned as he grabbed my legs and pulled them closer, penetrating even deeper.

"Mmmh, Chris," I moaned, raising my head to look at him.

"Shhhh," he said, placing my legs on either side of his head and encircling my knees with his arms to make sure I couldn't move.

He began thrusting into me at an unbearable speed, and the new angle allowed him to go really deep. His eyes were fixed on the lower part of my belly, where he could see himself entering and exiting. "Fuck," he exclaimed, keeping his mouth open.

"Chris! Chris, fu—god, don't stop!" I said, feeling my orgasm hit me hard when I started clenching around him. He spread my legs again to kiss me while still penetrating me, allowing me to ride out my orgasm.

He gradually stopped his pelvic movements while continuing to kiss me. Our kiss was tired and messy, but he didn't stop there.

We were both catching our breath. He separated our lips, pressing his forehead against mine. We stayed like that for a few seconds before he straightened up and withdrew from me, making me moan because I was still extremely sensitive.

I expected anything but what he did the next second. He grabbed me by the hips and turned me over again, pushing me on all fours.

"Chris, what—" Before I could finish my sentence, he started pounding into me without mercy, making me cry out in surprise and pleasure.

"Oh my fuck, Chris, I can't!" I told him, burying my head in the pillow once again.

"Yes, of course, you can. I know you have one more for me," he said without slowing down this time, bringing his fingers to my clit, making my eyes roll back in my head.

It felt so good, but I was still too sensitive; he didn't give me enough respite. I felt like my heart was going to give out from the intensity. I couldn't help but moan, even though I was unsure if I really wanted him to stop because I could already feel my third orgasm approaching.

"Do you really want me to stop?" he said in my ear, slowing down and pressing his chest against my back.

When he slowed down, I felt my orgasm slipping away, and I thought I was losing my mind. "No! Don’t stop, I can take it!" I said, shaking my head.

He wrapped his arm around my throat to hold me in place "that's my girl," he said and sank his teeth into my shoulder, mixing pleasure and pain in the best way possible. He sped up again, his fingers massaging my clit, and his shaft going as deep as possible, making me see stars.

I was close, and so was he; I could feel it in the way he moaned. "Y/n, oh my—"

"Chris, I'm so close," I cried, feeling my orgasm on the verge of exploding.

"Give it to me, baby. Fuck, cum for me, princess," he said, and that was all I needed to climax. This one was more intense than the others, stronger and more hypnotic.

After a few more thrusts, Chris also came, moaning my name in my ear. "Oh my god," he said, breathless, before pulling out and collapsing beside me.

I didn't move a muscle, too exhausted from everything that had just happened. "Are you okay, baby?" he asked, concerned, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear.

"Yes, I'm fine. I just need to catch my breath," I replied, chuckling.

He laughed too before getting up to find something to clean me up. After a few minutes catching my breath in Chris's arms, we decided to get dressed and join our friends downstairs before someone noticed our absence.

And when I say someone, I obviously mean Julia, who will probably kill me when she finds out I slept with Chris in her bed.

Before leaving Julia's room, Chris kissed me one last time. "I missed you so fucking much," he said.

I chuckled before replying, "I missed you too, but we need to leave this room now." I said playfully, giving him a playful punch on the shoulder.

We finally left the room, and our paths separated when we arrived in the living room because Nick needed to talk to Chris privately.

I was about to join my best friend when I felt someone grab my arm.

I turned to see who it was and found myself face to face with a girl with brown hair and light eyes.

"Who the fuck are you?" she asked me, full of rage.

I was completely confused because I didn't know this girl at all, and I didn't understand why she was addressing me this way.

"Hmm? Y/n, who are you?" I asked, furrowing my brows.

Her eyes widened when she heard my name, and she let out a fake laugh at my response.

"I'm Tess, Chris's girlfriend!" she said with a big smile before approaching me. "So I suggest you keep your distance from him if you don't want me to bash your little depraved slut face!" she said, pushing me before turning on her heel and walking away.

Chris's girlfriend?!!

What the fuck?

Taglist: @chrisloyalgf @christopherscamopants @blahbel668 @thematthewlover @mattsturnioloarchive @carolinalikesthings @bernardsgf @whicked-hazlatwhore @hearts4chris

[maximoffwitch]

Glad your back! Hope all is well and continues being so!

For any drabble or blurb, I’ll just be really happy with some Natasha x avenger reader, fluffy stuff with Nat being a little spoon? If possible please! Thank you! 🙏🤍

After a Hard Day’s Work

pairing: natasha romanoff x reader

warnings: tooth rotting fluff

summary: After a long day, Natasha comes home to the best thing she could ask for: you.

word count: 660

a/n: at this point idk how long or short a drabble or blurb is even supposed to be?? anyways pls enjoy this and keep sending me some short ideas :))

Natasha let out a long sigh, as she stepped into the New York apartment she shared with you. A year into your relationship, the two of you decided to finally move out of the compound and settle in a home of your own.

Dropping her bag and keys next to the door, Nat couldn't stop the small smile from creeping onto her face when she heard you humming along to music playing in the kitchen.

"Nat?" you called out, knowing your girlfriend had come home, having sense her energy. You tried not to use your powers when they weren't necessary, but telekinesis wasn't something you could just easily turn on and off.

"Hey, detka," she entered the kitchen, wrapping her arms around your waist, careful not to distract you from whatever you were stirring on the stove.

"Hi, my love," you sank into your girlfriends embrace and turned your head to greet her with a quick peck. "Hard day?"

"Mhm," Natasha hummed against your skin, as she nuzzled her nose into the crook of your neck. "It was hell. Fury and Hill piled on the paper work from last mission, which took forever, so I'm sorry I'm a bit late."

"No worries," you clicked off the stove and turned around to face the redhead. You did well to hide your frown, but your heart ached, as you could see the exhaustion radiating off your girlfriend. "I drew you a hot bath so it's warm when you get in and dinner is almost ready."

Natasha returned your beaming expression with one of wonder. She would never understand how someone like her could ever deserve someone like you, and yet here you were.

Pulling you closer by the pockets of your apron, Natasha kissed you, pouring all of her appreciation and love for you into the kiss.

"You are the absolute best," she whispered, tenderly tucking a piece of hair behind your ear. "What would I do without you?"

"Hopefully you'll never have to find out," you gave her a cheeky smile.

"How about," Natasha's voice dropped an octave lower, as she moved her hands closer to your ass, "we come back for dinner later, and you join me in my bath?"

Never one to refuse your girlfriend, you fondly rolled your eyes and smirked, "If you wanted to see me naked, Romanoff, all you had to do was ask."

Natasha chuckled heartily and pulled you by the hand, dragging you towards the bathroom. The two of you quickly stripped your clothes before sinking into the warm bubbly water.

"Thank you for this," Natasha leaned back against your chest, intertwining your fingers with hers.

"No need to thank me, Nat" you beamed down at her, her moist skin positively glowing in the dim candlelight.

Leaning her head back so she could look up at you, Natasha bit her lip, "I love you."

"I love you too," you kissed her forehead, as the redhead contently closed her eyes.

You basked in the comfortable silence the two of you shared, taking great pleasure in the feeling of Natasha's skin against your own.

"Sometimes I wonder," you hummed, a mischievous glint in your eyes, "what the world would think..."

"What the world would think about what?" Nat sat up to lean her head back against your shoulder, furrowing her brows slightly.

"What would people think of the mighty, formidable Black Widow being the little spoon in a lavender-scented bubble bath with her girlfriend?"

"Oh, shut up," she bit back a grin and pinched you.

"Ouch," you pouted playfully, giving her your best doe eyes, "that hurt."

"I'm sorry, lyubov moya," Natasha atoned, as she turned so she now straddling you, her nipples barely brushing yours, causing you to inhale sharply.

You gulped, as you recognized the sultry look in your girlfriends eyes.

"How can I make it up to you?" she huskily whispered, pulling your earlobe between her teeth.

"I can think of some ways."

[nevernonline]

✧.* grow as we go; svt smau.

entry #09 seeing red.

synopsis: over the past ten years you’ve fallen in love many times. one day someone happens to stumble across your journal sitting out on your nightstand and started posting your entries online. after all of your secrets are leaked it’s clear things would ever be the same again.

𐦍 paring: svt members x afab! reader.

𐦍 feat: non-idol! svt, (g)-idle minnie&soyeon, oc’s

𐦍 genre/s: reader is super angsty low-key, fluffy, sexual themes.

𐦍 content: swearing, bullying, crazy ex’s, mentions of sexual relations, some drinking& mary jane 🍃

word count: 2.7k

masterlist ▸ 008 not the bath mat.  ▸ 010 coming soon

“You okay?”

Seokmin’s voice rang through y/n’s ears as she drove her car away from of Vernon’s white apartment building. 

“Yeah, I think so. I’m just nervous for some reason like I can’t put into words why, but my gut is telling me something is weird.” 

“Gut instincts are rarely ever wrong, but I’ll be by your side until you tell me you don’t need me to be. Okay?” 

Pulling up into the parking lot of the glass framed building just on the edge of the city overlooking the water, y/n felt her nervous sweating start to begin, almost begging for air conditioning to surround her like a chilled hug. 

“Want to hold my hand?” 

“Yes please, they’re clammy I’m sorry.” 

Gripping onto Vernon’s firm hand the three boys almost looking like her bodyguards bypassed the frenzy of people outside waiting to get their own peak at Minghaos installation themselves and walked through the door. 

The room was filled with small tables, made by hand as a final touch to Minghaos work, adorned with dainty black table clothes and bottles of champagne placed in ice buckets. 

The room was softly lit with yellow and white lighting making everyone have a glow that bounced off of them almost as if they weren’t real. 

“Would you guys like a drink? We have champagne and two signature cocktails, one is a gin based drink called ‘delicate’ and the other is a whiskey ginger based drink called ‘storm cloud.” 

The beautiful waitress signaled at y/n’s small group and pointed out the drinks on the table. 

“I think two storm clouds and one delicate one for sure. Y/n? What would you like?” 

You spun to look into Junhui’s big eyes, skating your head saying anything is alright with you so he made the conclusion to just order you the same as Seokmin to be safe. 

“Thank you.” 

Y/N placed a tip in the small bartenders jar and bid her a smile knowing she’ll be back for more later in the night 

“Should we look around now and try to find Minghao? Or wait a bit?” 

“Seok lets just wait here, it doesn’t seem like anyone is looking around yet, I'm trying to spy for Minnie and Mingyu.” 

“And Mimi.” 

“Yeah. Her too.” 

“Guys, Vernon and I are going to go find Vernon’s friend Seungkwan. We'll be back in a second.” 

“No problem.” 

Y/n and Seokmin waved the cute couple off into the crowd. 

“So y/n.” 

“Seoky.” 

“How are we feeling now? What was going on in the car?” 

“I don’t know. I told you I’m alright.” 

“Yeah but you don’t have to lie to me about that.”

“I promise you I would never lie to you, we basically took an unintentional blood oath as kids it stays” 

“Okay. I love you, you know that right? But I rarely see you nervous like this so I can’t help but feel concerned.”

“Shut up. Yes I do and I love you too. I promise im alright.”

Averting her gaze back to the front door she watched as Minnie and Mingyu walked hand and hand, strutting past a very devious looking Mimi standing to the right, chit chatting with someone who was unrecognizable to y/n. 

“They look good together.” 

“Yeah, they do.” 

“Do you think this fake dating is going to lead to them.. you know.” 

“Well. If I can be honest with you y/n which I'm sure I can, I think it already has.” 

“Yeah.” 

“Are you alright with that?” 

“I am actually. Any other time it would’ve killed me I think, but now.. I don’t know? I’m content. They make sense.” 

“You shine too bright to have someone who shades you.” 

“What does that even mean?” 

“I don’t know actually, I think im drunk already.” 

Y/n placed a small kiss on Seokmin’s temple laughing at his flushed cheeks before a familiar yet irritating voice cut through their ears. 

“Y/n, Seokmin. Hi! You both look absolutely gorgeous. Mind if I sit?” 

“Hi, Mimi. Sure.” 

“How are you guys? This is so beautiful and we haven’t even seen his art yet, how crazy. He’s so talented.” 

“Yeah it’s nice. You look great, I love your bag.” 

“Thank you. You look nice. I see you didn’t go with the outfit you picked out the other day.” 

“Hao told us to come in black so it just didn’t feel right.”

“Mimi, can I ask you how you know Minghao again?” 

“Oh wow, well it’s a long story. We met a few years ago, I haven’t seen him in a while actually.” 

“Ah, I see. Did you go to school together or?” 

“Wow Seokmin, someone’s nosey.” 

“Oh, sorry no, not nosy just curious is all. I didn’t know you knew him.” 

“It’s okay. Our parents actually work together.” 

“Nice.” 

“Do you know if he arrived yet? I’m sure he’d love to see you in this gorgeous outfit. Leaving everything to the imagination, he likes conservative girls.” 

“No we haven’t seen him, we're just waiting for Junhui actually.” 

“Aw, cutie. His boyfriend seems so nice, I stalked them online today. Dumb and dumber vibes, you know? I’m more curious though did you see Minnie and Mingyu? How trashy getting with your friends hook up? Maybe she truly has it out for you. You’re too pretty to never be the one to end up with the guy. But actually you should just date Seokmin, everyone knows how much you guys love each other, it could work out well.”

“Oh I-

“Well, I have to get going and find my way to the girls room. I’ll see you later. Toodles.” 

“Toodles” 

Seokmin’s voice gained a depth that you haven't heard since someone pushed him in the fountain at your high school during senior prank week. 

“What the fuck was that?” 

“Fucking weird is what that was.” 

Seokmin’s tone turned quickly into a quiet mocking of Mimi’s.

“Dumb and Dumber vibes.”

The two of them laughed as they shrugged off the interesting encounter with a former foe.

A bartender came over to the pair and handed them both a flute of champagne, as the rest of the patrons erupted into a roar when Minghao made his way into the building, Wonwoo walking beside him, smiling at his friend who was receiving praise from his acquaintances, hugging and high fiving him for his success, some chanting for him to make a speech.

Minghao walked straight past Mimi who was stealthily placed behind a tall gentleman the star of the night was not paying any attention to her whatsoever, almost like she was invisible. He strode over to the small table where y/n and Seokmin were awkwardly standing clutching the glass flutes, wrapping his arms around the both of them at the same time. 

“You guys look.. amazing, thank you for coming.” 

Minghao took a deep breath and looked up and down at the girl he had his arm around. 

“Seriously. Thank you.” 

“Our pleasure.” 

“I’ll be back after I say some thank yous, maybe we can all walk through together okay?” 

“Cool.” 

The intimate crowd surrounded Minghao and Wonwoo handed him the matching glass of sparkling wine and he held it up as a small cheers. 

Y/n peaked through the crowd and spotted Minnie and Mingyu to her right, still looking as loving as ever, Vernon and Jun to her left with an unrecognizable boy, who threw a small wave in her direction that she could only pass off as Seungkwan the only one she couldn’t place was Mimi.

“Hey guys. I just wanted to say thank you for coming tonight to the opening of my show. It’s been about a two year process to finally get through to this night. Many of you have been around much longer than that, so thank you for supporting me even when I was up late at night calling you upset about how it wasn’t going to work out. Vernon, Wonwoo, Seungkwan, and Mingyu, you guys truly were the only reason I didn’t jump ship many times from achieving this goal. It’s nice to see old faces like yours mixed into a group of new friends. So thank you, everyone, really. We’re going to take a peek through the gallery now, feel free to bring your drinks and grab some more along the way. And yeah, just enjoy yourselves. Thank you.” 

The clapping dwindled down as the group followed Minghao through the journey he went through over the past two years starting from just a week ago up until the beginning. 

Y/N stopped Seokmin to look at a very small white canvas decorated with various pastel water color paints mixed with an oil that looked almost the color of fresh blood. 

“Do you know when I did that?” 

“This?” 

Minghaos voice spoke up behind them quietly, not wanting the room to echo as the group was admiring the work during their part one journey. Seokmin smiled down at his female friend and decided to take the opportunity to wander off on his own like any good wingman would do. 

“Yeah.” 

“Uh, no. Is this a trick question?” 

“No it’s not, but it was that night I found you on your floor, looking at those pictures of you and your friends.” 

“I- You got inspired by that? How?” 

“Not sure I have time to explain it right now, but look at the title.” 

‘About you’ was written on the plaque to the right side of the artwork. 

“Wow. Thank you.” 

“No thank you, I couldn’t have finished any of this without you actually.” 

The art curator swooped Minghao away from your side moving the group into the second room, where the energy was colder, the lighting was turned down slightly, causing the fading colors the feel cold and dark and full of sadness especially coming from the front of the house that was bright and full of life. 

y/n was on her own now, sitting near the back of the group losing her sight of all her comfort blankets that were her friends. 

She spotted the red lip of Mimi directly across the room, also slipping to the back, trying to blend into the crowd as she looked around. 

After spending a good ten minutes looking around the group was led through a vinyl curtain into a room full of dark red lights, the canvases on the wall now sunk to the floor of the room and scattered themselves alongside ripped and tattered papers on the concrete floors.

Something in y/n’s stomach had told her she should leave now, the growing anxiety of the light and coldness of the room, with near to no talking as the faint look of paint splatter sunk into her eyes on the walls almost like old blood. 

She tried to turn around and make her exit through the same vinyl door when a hand came up to her wrist. 

“Where do you think you’re going?” 

“Oh, Mimi hi, shit you scared me. I actually don’t feel well. I was going to dip out for a second.” 

“Aw, come on y/n you can’t leave Minghao now. Not before the big finale.” 

“Right..” 

“Be right back, I’ll find Seokmin for you.” 

“Thank you.” 

All of the sudden as Mimi walked away a projector screen hit the wall, various old videos shot on a cam recorder. 

Y/n had recognized the faint pink colored walls, her own childhood room.

“Let’s go fucking crazy.”

The words came from lips that were set behind the camera only y/n knowing it was the sound of Mimi’s voice as she was being filmed sitting on the bed of her old room, a bottle of cheap vodka in her hands. 

“Okay, y/n I want you to see how pretty you are. We can send this to Joshua as a birthday gift. Should I turn the lights off more?” 

She watched herself as she nodded awkwardly giggling on top of the zebra sheets, her hands pushing the red bottle of liquor to her lips, dribbling the liquid down her chin, the sight of tears welling up in her round eyes.

“Y/nnie don’t be sad, nobody will ever find out we accidentally hurt anyone, okay? My dad said she’ll be okay, just a broken leg. Just let loose.” 

The lights flickered off the screen straight into her soul pushing down the memories of Mimi stealing her dads car while intoxicated to go and buy more alcohol before this very moment played out. 

Suddenly she saw red. All of this had been a set up to embarrass her. Another nail in her coffin. 

Her eyes filled with tears as she watched Mimi turn the people in the room to sit and stare at her face.  Watching the scene play on as Mimi told a very naive twenty year old girl to strip herself of her own clothes to impress the boy she liked and forget about the worst day of her life. 

The people in the room sized her up and down, some turning back to the screen, others reading a small handout that was stuffed into a map of the museum while giggling at the journal entries she wrote about her once crush and the man she had fallen for now before she even made the connection of who he was to her all of those years ago.

Y/n’s legs felt like jello, yet something in her built up the strength to bolt through the vinyl curtain, her heels echoing through the white walls like bullets hitting a glass window. 

She heard a voice cutting through the sound of her heels behind her calling out, but she decided she couldn’t stop to turn around and face anyone. It was a secret that couldn’t be shared, something that Mimi used as a final dagger to cut everyone out of her life the same way she cut the girl out of her own. 

As she reached the fresh air of the front doors, the same cute bartender was sitting out on the curb smoking a cigarette looking concerned for y/n’s well being. 

“Are you alright?” 

“No.” 

“Want a cigarette?” 

“A ride maybe? If it’s not too much to ask. I dropped my phone somewhere, I have cash I can pay you. I just need to get out of here now.” 

“I don’t need your money, it’s okay. Let me help you get a cab okay?” 

“Thank you, really. What’s your name?” 

“Rena. Yours?” 

“Y/n” 

Rena walked quickly with y/n to the outside cab pickup on the corner of the art museum, quickly hailing you a cab and shutting you tightly inside, leaving you with the last four cigarettes stuffed inside her metal case. As you drove off with a wink from her, meaning she had a feeling she’d see you again. 

“55 Miles Avenue, please” 

The driver sped through the night lights avoiding cars like it was a game. Pulling up outside the familiar front of Joshua’s building. 

Basically throwing money at him and whispering a quick thank you, y/n ran her way up to his elevator, finally reaching his floor, and knocking heavily on the door. 

In the few seconds he took to come unlock his apartment to her, she realized how desperate and deschevled she must look. 

“Y/n? It’s still early, are you okay?” 

“No.” 

“Come in, come in.” 

Her tears suddenly grew stronger, sinking down to his wooden floor, feeling his hands grab her shoulders and sink down with her. 

“What happened?” 

Words couldn’t form in her mouth correctly, she managed to spill a couple of sentences that made a way to fill him in. 

“Fuck. Y/n come on, let’s get you a shower and some fresh clothes.” 

Joshua’s arms picked the girl off the floor and led her into his black marble bathroom, which suddenly felt like an oasis to her. 

The water ran hot, scorching her body of the sins and embarrassment she had just gone through, spending more time scrubbing away at her skin and hair, feeling like it would help if she rubbed her skin nearly raw. 

Stepping out of the shower she grabbed the gray hoodie and soft sweatpants Joshua had laid out for her, taking her time to step into her clothes and walk out into her reality. 

“I ordered you some food. Come on.” 

As she finished eating in her daze, the boy to her left carefully rolled the thin paper over the green flower and lit the end, handing her a relief from her stress. 

“Thank you.” 

“Want to talk about it?” 

“Not right now.” 

“Okay. But im sorry I made you befriend her again, I should’ve known better y/n. I really thought she had changed.”

“Stop. Please, I really don’t want to talk about her right now.”

“Okay, just one last thing. Why do you think she did it?”

“I honestly have no idea.”

“But do you think Minghao had something to do with it I mean she basically ruined his whole night just for her own revenge. Seems weird that he-“

“Josh.”

“Okay. okay.”

Joshua and y/n sat in the haze of their shared joint, not talking until she finally had enough of a high to fall asleep next to him on the couch and chose to deal with her problems the next day. 

bonus:

note/s: part one of y/n’s wild ride fr. i feel like yall all know we can trust seok/bernon/wonu/junhui for sure 😌✊🏻 but for everyone else the jury (me) is still out lmao. IK MY ASS USED THE WRONG YOUR ok thank u lets just chalk it up to seokmin being drunk and silly lmao <3 i kept telling myself this is too rushed but i also didn’t want to overwhelm and put more of the drama here so lol. def prob typos etc etc bc i was editing at night which i def shouldn’t do anymore lmao. ok ttyl ily.

tag list:  @sun-daddy-yoriichi,@hipsdofangirl@kissesfrmwonwoo, @minhui896, @wonwooz1, porridgesblog,,  jasssy051, @soonyoungblr, @saucegirlreads, @musingsofananxiouspotato, @young-adult-summer, @punkhazardlaw, @bibs-world@the-swageyama-tobiyolo@wonuulvr@woozixo @k-drama-adict

[spicerackofblorbos]

Chapter 4: February

☾ Pairings ➼ Levi Ackerman x fem!mute!Reader (she/her pronouns), set in a modern semi-fictional world

☾ Summary ➼ Due to childhood trauma, you find yourself an adult without the ability to speak. After years of working on it, you have found ways to live without a voice. Now here in your late 20s, you are 5 months in getting used to a new town. On a fateful day in late November, you and your adopted sister visit a local bookstore-café, unaware of the friendships about to blossom. Throughout the months, one friendship in particular develops into something more.

☾ Content/Warnings ➼ fluff, slowburn, oblivious feelings, angst, mention of minor character deaths, trauma, illness, adoption, mentions of fire, disabilities, alcohol use, very light nsfw mentions, references to child abuse (to be continued as writing is ongoing)

☾ Author's note ➼ Hey guys! Happy (early) Valentine's Day! This would have been out much earlier but I figured since it's February, I would actually release it near the holiday the chapter is actually about. I'm so excited to finally release this into the wild! I'm in the process of working on March but I might take a break to work on some fluffy drabbles/one-shots because tis the season! I'll be back soon with more!

☾ Word Count ➼ ~8.5k (this one is even longer and I'm not even sorry about it)

Your bedroom floor is littered with piles of the clothes you spent the last hour trying on then discarding out of dissatisfaction. You and Hange were expecting company soon and you were standing in just your undergarments while staring into your almost empty closet in disdain. It felt as if you were 17 again, freaking out the morning before a school day because you were not comfortable with any of the fabrics in your wardrobe. You throw your hands up in the air and exhale loudly, thinking to yourself of how hopeless this endeavor was.

With people coming over, you wanted to try and dress up a bit. But in frustration, you opt for your usual wear of jeans and a baggy pullover sweater. Pulling your hair up in two little buns, you just grunt in acceptance. At least you were comfortable, which is the most important factor here. After slipping on a mismatched pair of socks, you pad back into the living room where Hange sat on the floor milling around on her work laptop.

‘Working again?’ You sign at them while passing them to the kitchen. You open a cupboard for a can of black tea. You were told Levi was coming over for the get together and you wanted to make sure there was tea ready. For everyone, of course, not just Levi. Or so you keep telling yourself.

“Just finishing up a couple documents is all. Did you make sure that we had the ingredients for the cookies today?” They mumble from behind the screen, their fingers zooming over the keyboard as they speak. Their eyes flick up at you as you sign a quick yes and they nod in response, shoving their face back into their reports.

You make quick work of the electric tea kettle, pushing the button to get the water boiling before tossing in a couple teaspoons of loose leaves in your favorite teapot. It was a gift from your foster-parents many years ago and it had golden bunnies hopping around on a light teal background. After the kettle shuts itself off, you pour the water into the teapot to steep then place the lid on top gently.

You then set forth to make sure your wipe-off board had fully stocked markers for tonight, placing them on the kitchen bar for you to reach easily. Texting might be faster, but a wipe-off board served better with a crowd of people so everyone could see what you were saying. When you’re satisfied with everything, you then turn to Hange.

It was past two in the afternoon, and they were still in their pajamas with a rat’s nest in place of their hair. Company was due soon and she was still tapping away, so you go up behind them and place your hands on their shoulders gently. She hums in response, not turning to you. You lean forward and place a hand on the laptop, and she stops. They cock their head up to look at you and their glasses glint off the afternoon sun coming through the dining room window. You furrow your brows at them and scrunch your nose.

“Can I help you?” She asks. Nodding, you release your hands to sign to her.

‘You need a shower.’ She purses her lips and averts her gaze.

“I have time, let me just finish this report first.”

‘No, shower first and then come back to this.’

“But-” You cut them off by pinching her cheek, not hard enough to bruise but enough to leave a mark.

‘Don’t make me throw you in the bath, you know I’ll do it.’ You smirk while raising an eyebrow at them. You’re met with an eyeroll, but she saves her work before shutting her laptop anyways. You kiss her forehead from above and then move back so they can stand up.

‘Thanks, don’t forget to wash your ass.’ You laugh silently and she just gives you a disgusted look before heading into her room, laptop under her arm. She flips you a bird before disappearing behind her door. You grin at yourself and then head back to the kitchen to set out some butter to soften.

For Valentine’s Day this year, Hange decided to throw a little party at your shared apartment. You just wanted to bake and watch stupid movies together, but they talked you into socializing. She had said something about today not being just for couples. She wanted to “celebrate singleness”, her words not yours. So of course, you were roped in because honestly, where else would you have to be? But that also meant she had invited quite a few people as well; a few coworkers and Erwin. And with Erwin, the invitation had spread to Miche and Levi. The latter of which you were excited for, no matter how much you told yourself it wasn’t such a big deal.

You smile at how close you and Levi had gotten in the past couple weeks, getting to know each other a little more as the days passed. It mainly consisted of texting each other little things you thought you’d both like or little hangouts at the café after hours. The café meetings were not anything new, of course, but they had a vastly different atmosphere than before. You chalk it up to the friendlier nature and usage of more words around each other.

You preoccupy yourself by pulling out the rest of the necessary ingredients and dishes needed for your baking adventure. One of the compromises Hange had made with you was the allowance of being able to still make your checkerboard cookies regardless of the plans. It was something you had picked up in the last couple years and it quickly became one of your favorite traditions. Hange did not refuse, which you think is mainly because she loved your baked goods and was looking forward to shoving them in her mouth. With that thought, you pull out another stick of butter to make a double batch just in case.

After a while, you place your hands on your hips and nod your head in satisfaction. Your ears pick up the sound of squeaking floorboards coming from Hange’s bedroom which signaled that she had finished bathing. Another noise comes from the front door with someone rapping on the hardwood. When you glance at the clock on the stove, it reads 2:47. Someone was a little early, you think to yourself as you saunter up to the door.

Pulling it open, you’re met with a smiling Erwin holding a small bundle of flowers and a bottle of wine. Miche flanks him with a box of canned beer under one arm, his other out to give you a hug which you run into instantly, making sure to do the same with Erwin. In the last month since their dinner party, it wasn’t just Levi you had gotten close to.

While you were already pretty comfortable with Erwin through your sister, Miche was a confidant you hadn’t expected to have. Throughout the passing days, you found that he was as technologically competent as he was as good of a chef. When he wasn’t behind a computer screen, he was often found sending you obscure recipes through late night text messages that he wanted to try with you.

‘I’m so glad you two could make it!’ You sign to them ecstatically, breaking out into a grin.

“Wouldn’t miss it for the world.” Erwin chirps as he winks down at you.

Taking a step back, you lead them through the door with your hand. You peep a quick glance behind them to make sure there was no one else coming. To your disappointment, there wasn’t. You shut the door behind the two men with a sigh. Hange must have talked to them beforehand about the apartment rules because they were quick to pull their shoes off at the door before walking more into the apartment.

You follow them into the living room as you check your phone. No new messages. You had sent Levi a text earlier this morning to see if he was planning to make it, but he had not responded. So, when Erwin places the flowers and wine down on the kitchen counter, you step up next to him to get his attention.

‘Thank you so much for bringing these.’ You hesitate for a moment as he looks down at you patiently. ‘Is Levi still coming?’ You stare up into his bright eyes, his lips twitching in amusement at your question.

“Yes, he is just running a little behind. He had a stop to make before making his way here.” He pats your head and you just blush. But you feel immensely better, knowing that Levi was coming for certain. To not waste the tea you’ve made, of course, you remind yourself. You grab the bouquet of flowers and take a big whiff of them, relishing the sweet scent.

Bending down into a counter beneath you, you grab a vase and get to work trimming the stems so you can place it on the dinner table. Miche is quick to place a couple of his beers in the fridge along with the wine Erwin brought so they would be cold for later.

‘What kind of beer did you bring?’ You sign towards Miche, Erwin translating for you.

“Oh, definitely not something you would like, even if you did drink. I saw it at the store and had to try it though. There’s peanut butter in it apparently.” Miche tilts his head towards the fridge. You make a grimace at him, and he chuckles.

“Hange had said to BYOB but I can’t imagine just having beer would be great, so I elected for something sweeter.” Erwin furrows his eyebrows at the very idea.

‘You do know BYOB doesn’t just mean beer, right? It’s just a figure of speech.’

“Wait, really?”

Just then, Hange comes out sporting a towel wrapped on their head as well as a t-shirt and jeans. They chose to go for the comfortable yet casual look too. She grins widely at the new company and runs to give them both a big hug as well.

“You guys made it!” She shrieks.

“We told you we would.” Erwin’s deep timbre responds back nonchalantly.

“Yeah yeah, but I still worried I ran you off with how much I talked about it. We’re going to have so much fun today!” Hange starts chattering away about the plans she had made for everyone. You giggle to yourself as you listen to them talk excitedly.

Since you weren’t one for alcohol, you always ended up as the mom for everyone, doubly so for your sister. She may be 5 years older than you, but you always felt like more of the responsible one. You didn’t mind it though. You figured it was a good payoff for everything else she does for you on a daily basis. Suddenly, another knock from the front door echoes down the hall and you’re quick to throw the metal bowl you just grabbed from the shelf down onto the counter before running to see who it is.

Much to your dismay, it’s not Levi. When you pull open the door, you see three people; Moblit Berner being one of them, whom you have seen many times since your move here. Hange’s coworkers are all carrying their own vice for tonight in their arms.

You give them a small smile in welcome and Moblit offers a friendly one in return. The two companions behind him consist of Nanaba, someone you have only met twice in passing, and another man, someone you have never seen before. You eyeball him apprehensively as you wave to Nanaba in hello, to which she does the same in response.

“Oh yeah, Onyankopon,” Moblit turns his head over his shoulder to refer to the man. “This is Hange’s little sister.” He says kindly. You wave at the stranger, still wary. The man named Onyankopon is very tall and broad chested with a crew cut that faded up his head. He gives you a big smile that warms up his entire face and speaks to you in a velvety tone.

“It’s nice to officially meet you. You know, your sister talks a lot about you.” His chocolate eyes are even warmer than his demeanor, and you can’t help but grin back at him with a blush, deciding he was okay. You side-step so they can funnel into the door. Your eyes linger down the hallway without meaning to, hoping to see a raven-haired man stalking up to the door. But it remained empty, so you shut it with another sigh and turn back to the ever-growing crowded apartment.

The company sat in various places in the living room while idle chatter filled the space. Some even opted for the floor, Hange being one of them. After a while, you had to remind your sister to take off the towel she had wrapped around her head because she was so engrossed in her conversation that she didn’t even notice it. It had dried for so long that her hair was even more frazzled than before. You just shook your head at her in amusement.

You make yourself busy with the cookies while everyone converses, the noise turning into buzzing. The living room was so cramped with bodies that you could barely breathe, so you found great solace in the kitchen. At this point you had donned on an apron that had floral designs vining their way to the top. It was an attempt to keep the inevitable mess from splattering on to you. While you loved to cook and bake, you were not neat about it in any capacity, but you found that to be the fun of it.

After turning the mixing bowl on to blend the sugar and butter, you turn to your now cold teapot and sigh. It had gone cold, but you hate to waste it; you decide to pour it into a sealable cup to make iced tea with it later.

You start to juggle the choices of either starting a new pot now or waiting until everyone has arrived when your ears perk up at another knock at the door. Your heart now racing at who it could be, you stare out to the living room over the half wall to see if anyone heard but no one had even turned their head. You shut off the mixer then wipe your hands on your apron as you make your way to the door. Taking a deep breath, you pull it open effortlessly.

You can’t keep your face from breaking out into a grin when your eyes fall on the short man with a deadpan expression standing in front of you. Levi. Furlan is there as well, waving at you from behind his friend. You mouth a ‘Hi’ to them both, barely containing the giddiness from the present company.

“Sorry we’re late. Not only did this jerk decide he was tagging along, but he also spent an ungodly amount of time getting ready.” Levi’s gruff voice speaks out to you as he tips his head to Furlan. You meet his soft gaze, and he winks playfully. Levi was wearing a snug, black long sleeve with even darker denim jeans. Your stomach flips as you force yourself to stare into Levi’s metallic eyes.

Waving them in the door, they follow suit and take their shoes off to place next to the pile already sitting by the door. Levi scoffs, no doubt annoyed by the messiness. You’re suddenly hyper aware of how dirty the apartment must look compared to his. After shutting the door behind them, you spin around and almost run right into Levi. You gasp in surprise and step back right into the door with a ‘thud’. Furlan was long gone, and you can hear his playful voice reverberating down the hall as he introduced himself to the rest of the company.

“Are you okay?” Levi asks, concern lacing into his deep voice. You laugh at yourself silently as he eyes you carefully. You nod and wave your hands dismissively at him to show you were indeed okay.

“Mm. I bought these for tonight. Where can I put them?” He shifts three large bottles of various sodas in his arms in awkwardness. His eyes avert from you as he speaks. You stare stunned for a moment as you realize he must have bought them specifically for you. Noticing you haven’t moved, his eyes shift back up to you with an eyebrow raised. Cracking a smile, you nod. The flips in your stomach hardly cease as you tip your head forward to signify where the kitchen was, passing him as well to lead the way.

After he places the bottles in the fridge, he closes the doors, and his eyes widen in surprise at the mess before him. You being you, there was flour everywhere and butter wrappers lie discarded by the mixer. Said mixer was surrounded by sugar from when you missed the bowl earlier. You look away sheepishly as you feel a hard stare at your face.

“Are you a toddler?” He asks, but there is no malice. It almost sounded as if he was amused.

Grabbing one of the wipe-off boards you placed in the kitchen earlier, you pop off a cap and start scrawling. 'Maybe.' Flipping it over to him with a shrug, you see the corners of his mouth twitch.

'Tea?' You point to your cluttered tea station. Levi turns to see an open tin of tea leaves and an empty kettle. He says nothing as he gets to work, doing it all before you can do anything. You gawk at his deft hands as he makes quick work of it all, like he was back in his cafe. Some of his hair fell in his face as his head hung low in focus. After gently placing the porcelain lid back on the pot, he turns back to you.

'You didn't have to do that, you know. I was mainly asking so I could start it.'

"Tch, I was already here. Besides, I'm probably faster at it." You can't argue on that, so you just shrug your shoulders at him again with a slight smile. He leans back against the kitchen counter and studies your face, and you feel your face bloom in heat. You place the board back down on the counter and point to your mess to show you were going to start back on the cookies. Tightening your hair buns, you then wash your hands and get back to work on the mixer, throwing in the ingredients as needed.

After a moment, you hear something rustling behind you and when you glance to the source, you see Levi pulling on the other apron that hung off the fridge. You stare at him curiously and he just tightens the drawstrings behind him as he meets your gaze.

"I'm helping." You hesitate but scoot over in response, and he steps up next to you. Your arms are almost touching, and it takes everything inside of you not to combust. So, you both get to work like that, side by side. The sounds of chatter and laughter from the rest of the group fade out as you both concentrate. You hand him the rest of the ingredients and he carefully pours them in the bowl. When everything is incorporated and set aside, you then measure out the other ingredients for the chocolate portion of the cookies. You don’t see it, but Levi just watches you patiently, admiring your meticulous yet messy way of making sure everything is accurate. When you glance up at him, he looks away quickly.

"Whatcha two up to?" A sly voice rings out after a while. Startled, you both jerk your heads up from the tray you two were placing raw dough cutouts on. It's Hange, leaning on the wall with their chin cradled in two cupped hands. They have a very cheeky grin plastering their face.

"What does it look like, Four-Eyes?" Levi snaps back dryly.

"Well, since you're asking me. It looks like you two are having fun." They wiggle their eyebrows at you and Levi just scoffs and averts his gaze. Your cheeks flare up again because you were definitely having fun, but you weren’t going to admit that. Hange tuts at you two and reaches over to pat you on the head lovingly.

"I just came over because you were both ignoring our calls." Looking over their shoulder, you see Erwin eyeballing you and Levi with a raised eyebrow. He takes a sip of his drink and looks away to keep talking to Moblit and Onyankopon. Nanaba, Furlan, and Miche broke out a deck of cards and are in the middle of a game of Poker.

'Sorry, I wasn’t paying attention.' You sign to her, frowning.

"No worries, we were just wondering if you guys were hungry. We were thinking of pizza!" They clap their hands excitedly. They were always thinking of pizza, you laugh to yourself. Hange loves pizza so much that even the mere mention of its cheesy goodness would summon them right then and there. Your stomach rumbles just thinking about it as well, so you nod.

"I could eat." Levi states as he lifts his teacup to his lips, three fingertips on the rim. Him doing so reminds you of the cup Levi had poured for you that you had left to get cold. You lightly touch the sides of it, and it still feels warm. As you take a sip, you’re hit with the boldness of the leaf blend you had chosen as well as a perfect amount of sweetness. ‘Levi makes the best tea’, you think to yourself.

"Perfect, I'll get those ordered. We'll just stick to the basics, yeah?" She pulls out her phone and starts dialing the nearest pizza place while walking away to join everyone in the living room. Levi picks up the couple of trays filled with raw cookies and slides them into the pre-heated oven. When he turns around, you can't help but silently chuckle as you take a closer look at his face for the first time since you both started your venture.

There is a streak of cocoa powder on his forehead that starkly contrasts on his pale skin. You point to it and your shoulders bounce in silent laughter as he brings a hand up to it to rub the spot. His eyes go wide as he notices the brown powder that is now staining his fingers. He grabs the towel you had draped over the dishwasher to wipe it away, his ears turning pink. He turns away from you as he does.

You eye Levi as he folds the towel neatly and puts it back where he got it from, huffing under his breath. He then starts gathering the dirty dishes and piles them into the sink, tugging on the faucet to rinse them off. While he's busy on that, you begin wiping down the counters with a wet rag. Levi gives you a side-eye and you meet his gaze, giving him a warm smile. He looks away again to focus on a bowl he was currently spraying with hot water. As you stare at him for a second longer, you can’t help but think how well you two worked together.

You grab the board once more and write, ‘Thank you for your help. (:’ before flipping the board over to Levi as he dries his hands on the towel. His eyes trail the words, and he glances up at you with indifference.

“Mm.” He hums. His eyes flick over to the timer that was set on the stove as he leans back against the sink and takes another sip of his tea. The cookies had eight minutes left. It almost felt as if he was reading your mind because neither of you moved with the intention leaving the calm kitchen. When you look over to the living space, you see everyone talking over each other in lively conversation. Onyankopon is pointing at the small fish tank that sat nestled in the corner of the room as he shouts over to Hange, who is in the middle of cleaning off the coffee table.

“Hange, I didn’t know you had fish.” He bends down to take a closer look at the two little fish darting around shifting plants.

“Oh yes, they’re my little babies!” She stands straight up and jumps over to the tank and continues as she points at the respective tetras. “This one is Sonny and this one is Bean!” You can’t help but chuckle internally at your over enthusiastic sister. Ever since you both moved to Jinae, Hange really wanted pets. They had requested a dog, but they were too overwhelming for you. She wasn’t really around enough to be able to spend time with them anyways which meant most of it would fall on to you and you weren’t okay with that. So, you both compromised on her getting a couple fish to start out with and would think about the notion again later. Thus far, Hange has been very content with them and hasn’t asked for anything else.  

“They’re gorgeous, Hange.” Onyankopon compliments as he stares at the tank. Hange slaps him on the shoulder in appreciation and starts rambling off the reasons why she chose tetras and all the research she did on them.

“That’s it, boys. I win!” Nanaba shouts from the dining table, slamming her cards onto the hard surface. Furlan and Miche groan in frustration, the latter rubbing his face in exhaustion.

“I swear you’re cheating.” Furlan sits back in his chair as he places his own hand down.

“I second that.” Miche leans over to stare at her cards and just sighs. Dejected, he gets up and wanders towards the bathroom, almost running into Erwin as he emerges from that same direction.

“C’mon guys, at least I vetoed any betting.” She calls out, smirking as she piles the cards up and starts shuffling them.

“You just did that out of pity.” Nanaba just cackles maniacally at Furlan’s dispirited comment.

“Hange, there are too many men in here.” She twists in her chair to face your sister who turns to acknowledge Nanaba’s complaint.

“Psh, I’ll drink to that.” And she does, holding her drink up in cheers and takes a big gulp. You roll your eyes, but you agree. There were way too many men in your apartment right now. Just then, there’s a knock at the door and Hange stands up quickly, face alert like a meerkat in the African wilderness.

“Pizza!” They yell and then they’re off to the front door, a wad of cash in hand.

At the same time, the timer goes off with a soft beeping and you’re quick to grab the oven mitts to pull the trays out. You gingerly place the trays on the stovetop to let them cool and Levi reaches past you to turn off the oven, his face in your periphery as you glance to the side. His movements waft his scent straight into your nose and you find yourself breathing it in deeply. He smelled of clean laundry with a hint of body wash. It isn’t overpowering in the slightest and you revel in it.

“You two are missing out on the fun cooping up in here.” Someone speaks out behind you two as they walk through the archway to the kitchen. You both jump at the voice and turn to see Erwin holding an armful of empty alcohol containers.

“Tch, it beats being surrounded by a bunch of loud mouths.” Levi counters, turning back to the cookies to inspect them. You reach over to grab the trash can and hold it up to Erwin for him to dump the trash. Hange comes in behind him and places four stacked pizza boxes on the counter next to you. You stare at your sister in awe and sign, ‘That’s a lot of pizza.’

“I know but I didn’t know how hungry everyone was. Besides! Leftovers.” They give another cheeky grin, and you just playfully punch her arm. Reaching up in the cupboard behind you, you grab a handful of plates for everyone as well a cup for you, now realizing how parched your throat was.

“Oi, grab me one too.” Levi asks next to you, so you grab another after setting what you held down first. When you turn to hand it to him, he’s a lot closer than you expected and accidentally hit him in the side of the head with the glass in hand. He doesn’t even flinch. He’s looking up at you with knit eyebrows and a thin line in place of his lips.

“Ow.” You hear Erwin and Hange stifling laughter as they organize the pizza boxes.

You set the cup down and start signing frantically, ‘I’m sorry.’ over and over again. You place both of your hands on his face and tilt it so you could get a better look at the spot where you hit him, filled with relief when you find no visible damage. You’re in such a panic that you don’t even notice his stunned disposition. Your hands feel so warm against his cool skin, and it’s so soft. You realize what you’re doing after a moment and let your arms drop to your side, mouthing an apology and stepping away from him.

“It’s fine. I didn’t realize how long your arms were.” He mumbles as he walks over to the fridge without another word, cup in one hand, his other pressing against the spot where you smacked him. How long your arms were? That was such a weird thing to say. Flustered, you grab the plates and shuffle them over to the counter with the pizza. Now that they have opened the boxes, you get a closer look at the options.

There were a couple cheeses, one pepperoni, and one pineapple. Your eyes light up and you gaze at Hange with adoration, forgetting what just happened mere moments ago. They wink at you then call for everyone to plate up ‘while it’s hot’.

Yes, you ate pineapple on your pizza. It first began as a joke just to spite those who turned it down, but then you found out you actually enjoyed the taste. There was something about the sweet and savory flavors that blended perfectly.

Levi comes over with two glasses and hands one with what looked to be a dark cola to you. You mouth a ‘thank you’ as you watch his face twist in disgust as he eyes the boxes in front of him. “Are those pineapples?” Levi leans in for a better look, eyebrows knit.

“Pineapples?!” Furlan rushes over from the table to look at the pizza, the new poker game forgotten. “Alright, who’s the one who asked for them?” He looks around the room and spots you with your hand raised in the air.

“Oh my gosh I could hug you right now. Pineapple on pizza is the best!” He exclaims. He leans over the half wall to marvel at it and then looks back up to you with a massive smile. Levi clicks his tongue and grabs a slice out of the cheese box then makes his way into the living room. You can’t help but feel sad at the sudden absence.

.

“Okay, okay. My turn. Hange. Your obsession with zombies, what the fuck is up with that?” Nanaba leans on the coffee table in anticipation. Your sister just cackles and sits up straight as they push their glasses up their nose with a finger. There’s a glimmer in their eyes.

“That’s hardly a difficult question. I grew up watching zombie movies and I just need to know how they tick. Like what kind of sorcery goes into making them do the things they do?!”

“Hange, they’re fictional creatures, there’s no science that could ever explain that!” Moblit shouts from next to her, exhausted. Hange just laughs and goes on a tangent about possible ways to make and cure zombies, but you zone out as it’s a conversation you have had with them for many years. Looking around the table, you smile to yourself. Tonight has been such a fulfilling evening for you. Being around familiar faces as well as getting to know new ones brought more joy to you than you expected. Not to mention this ridiculous game you were all playing that made your face ache from laughter.

Miche had come up with a game called “What the fuck is up with that?” as a way to wind down from such a big dinner. Players ask someone something personal about their life and follow it with ‘what the fuck is up with that?’ and if they refuse to answer it, they have to take a drink. It honestly felt like a more cracked version of “Truth or Dare” but it was fun, nonetheless. You, of course, nursed soda in your hands instead of alcohol so you were the most sober one here.

So far, no one was really trashed. Tipsy, definitely; There were some words that were starting to slur. What surprised you the most was Levi’s soberness in comparison to everyone else considering how many times he had to take a drink. It figures that any questions directed to him, he opted for silence. You do, however, notice his cheeks were ever so slightly flushed when you glance at him next to you. He radiated an aura of relaxation, which you can’t help but assume is a rare thing for him. He turns to meet your gaze, not looking away after what felt like a good minute.

“Okay okay, we get it Hange. Enough!” Your attention is snapped back into the present company, and you break eye contact to see Onyankopon laughing and throwing a balled-up napkin at Hange’s face to shut her up.

“Fine, sorry! Hmm…” Their eyes wander on the people sitting in the circle with them until they land on Furlan’s face. “Alright, Furlan. You! You’re single and you’re extremely attractive. What the fuck is up with that?” Everyone’s attention shifts to Furlan’s bright red face.

“What the fuck is up with the singleness or the attractiveness?” His voice sounds an octave higher.

“Well, both, obviously, dumbass.” Nanaba pitches in.

“I well. Uh.” His eyes flicker to yours and then look away just as quickly. “I just haven’t found what I was looking for yet, I guess. And for the attractiveness, I just am?” He shrugs his shoulders and laughs nervously. He takes a sip of his drink anyways as he averts his gaze to anything but the people in front of him.

“Hmmm. I don’t know if I’m okay with that answer, but I’ll let it slide. Okay, you pick the next one!”

“Oh okay, uhh.” His eyes travel around until they lock eyes with you again. “The berry nickname. What the fuck is up with that?” Everyone’s gaze now shifts on you. You realize that Hange had called you her ‘little berry’ in front of everyone but had never really given an explanation. You bite your bottom lip and start scrawling on your board. Everyone waits for you patiently and a wave of gratitude washes over you. They really were a great group of friends.

‘When I was younger, I used to steal Hange’s berries from their parfaits.’ You flip the board, and everyone is silent as they read. They burst into laughter one by one, Hange included. Even Levi’s scarred mouth has an upturn. You couldn’t give the full story because it would be too long for you to write, but growing up in the foster system meant you were deprived of a lot of good things, one of those being fresh fruit. So, when the night came when the Zoe’s officially adopted you and they wanted to celebrate with parfaits, you went absolutely feral. You had never tasted anything like fresh berries before and they quickly became your favorite thing in the world, next to your sister of course.

“You guys should have seen her for the month after that. All she wanted was berries for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. She prefers strawberries, but we don’t discriminate here. All berries are valid!” She yells, taking another sip of her drink. You laugh silently along with them and start thinking of the next victim. After a few moments, you scribble down what was on your mind. Then you point to Erwin and his eyes bulge at the sudden movement but straightens up anyways, clearing his throat.

‘So Erwin, I notice you’ve been taking my sister out for drinks quite often. Your relationship with them, what the fuck is up with that?” You smile innocently at your sister’s composed face.

“Psh, easy.” He pats your sister on the head and Hange just laughs in response, swatting at it. “You of all people know how fun she is to be around. More so when she’s drunk. She’s a great karaoke partner.” They clink the bottles they had in their hands together and smile at each other. You furrow your eyebrows and stick your tongue out.

‘Boooooooo.’ You write and your sister just shoves your shoulder.

“C’mon, you can’t seriously think there’s anything happening between this,” Hange wiggles their index finger in between her and Erwin. “Like really. We’re definitely not each other’s type.”

Miche snorts and mutters something under his breath but you can’t hear the words. Erwin chuckles and nods in agreement then takes another sip of his drink as he surveys the faces in front of him. They land on Levi and his gray eyes bore into Erwin’s crystal blue.

“Hey Levi…” Erwin has a smirk playing on his lips as he stares at his best friend. “I notice you’ve been smiling when you look down at your phone recently. What the fuck is up with that?” Erwin’s eyes sparkle mischievously. Levi just scoffs but you gawk at him with wide eyes, along with Furlan and Hange. Levi doesn’t smile. Sure, you can always tell when he’s fighting it. But you’ve never seen his curt demeanor break into joy.

Levi narrows his eyes on Erwin then answers with a big swig of his glass, finishing off the contents in it as he continues to stare at his friend. Levi’s face is certainly more flushed than before, the tips of his ears bright red as well. He looks away, refusing to meet anyone’s eyes.

“Booooooo!” Hange echoes what you had exclaimed earlier.

“Leeeeeviiii! Are you talking with someone?! I thought you were mine.” Furlan pouts, arms crossed.

“It’s none of your goddamn business.” Levi’s voice is brusque. He gets up from his spot quickly and takes his empty glass to the kitchen.

“What do you mean? I think your friends deserve to know.” Hange sits up on their knees to call over to Levi’s backside.

“Then we’re not friends.” He says and disappears down the hall to the bathroom.

“Is he always like that?” Nanaba questions as she finishes her own drink as she stares down the hallway.

“Yes, it’s very normal for him.” Erwin states matter-of-factly, chuckling at the rise he got from Levi.

“Short and angry. It’s quite the combo.” Onyankopon cuts in, grinning.

You fidget with the wipe-off marker as you think about how he reacted. It wasn’t very surprising to you. Levi is a very private man when it comes to such things. All of the conversations you had with him were still on a fundamental surface layer. You knew better than to ask anything deeper for fear of him shutting you out, like he just did with Erwin’s question. Levi, at least, didn’t sound angry right now, but you suspect it was because it was someone so close to him asking such a question. If it was you… then. Well, you were scared of what he might do from such an intimate question.

“Yanno what, it’s probably about that time I head out. It’s getting pretty late.” Moblit chimes in as he starts to get up from his spot on the floor.

“Whaaat!? We still have one more thing left to do. Besides, it’s literally,” Hange takes a glance at the clock on the wall. “10:30. Just a little longer??” They clasp their hands as they beg, staring up at her friend.

“I must agree with Moblit here, we need to submit our report before the end of this week.” Onyankopon replies as he gets up as well. He squeezes Hange’s shoulder as he speaks with a slight smile. Hange sticks her bottom lip out.

“Fine, fine. But just know, you’re missing out on only the greatest tradition ever: Making fun of stupid romance movies.”

“I wanna do that!” Nanaba cuts in, laughing at the idea.

“Nanaba, we’re literally your ride home.” Moblit calls out from the dining room as he pulls on his winter jacket. Grabbing Nanaba’s as well, he makes sure to pick up the deck of cards they brought and shoves it into her jacket pocket.

“Boo.” She gets up clumsily and huffs. “You two are no fun.”

“What she said.” Hange says, sticking her tongue out again.

“Seriously though, Hange. Great party. We had a really good time.” Onyankopon compliments as he zips up his own coat. At this point, everyone is standing up as they talk to each other. You glance over and notice that Miche is getting ready to leave too.

‘You’re going too?’ You scrawl to him quickly.

“Ah yes, unfortunately IT never takes a break.” He mutters to you solemnly as you go in to give him a tight hug. “Are we still on for next Wednesday?” You nod at him with a cheerful grin. “Great, I’ll see you then.” He ruffles your hair and walks past to say goodbye to everyone else.

After a few more goodbyes, it’s just you, Hange, Erwin, and Furlan standing in the living room. Your sister and Erwin were conversing about what movie to watch as Furlan shuffles up next to you. Levi still hadn’t come out of the bathroom yet.

“I bet he’s taking a shit.” His blasé statement makes you giggle uncontrollably, your shoulders shaking as you do. You hold your hand to your mouth to compose yourself as you give Furlan such a bewildered look. He just winks at you.

“Furlan, I’m going to kick your ass.” Levi’s sharp voice cuts in behind you both and it makes you both jump.

“Hey now, I was just kidding.” Furlan’s voice wavers as he takes a step back. You wave at Levi with a warm smile, but he just averts his gaze and goes to sit down on the sofa, one leg crossed on his knee. Biting your cheek, you go and find a spot on the floor, making sure to put a pillow under your butt for comfort. Hange and Erwin are flicking through a bunch of streaming apps trying to find the chosen movie for tonight.

“Ah okay, I know what we’re doing!” Hange slaps their hands together in finality. Erwin makes his way to the armchair and sits back with a heavy sigh.

“Not my first choice.” He says, pinching the bridge of his nose with two fingers.

“Oh c’mon. Everything about it screams bad romance. Plus, it’s the worst out of all of them.”

“Hange, you never cease to amaze me.” Furlan states as he takes the spot next to Levi.

Twilight: New Moon? Really? In your heart of hearts, you couldn’t completely hate Twilight as you were practically obsessed with it in your late teens. But you had to agree, it wasn’t the best out of the five films. It’s like Hange knew what you were thinking because they stare directly into your eyes and wiggle their eyebrows at you teasingly. You roll your eyes, and she chuckles.

“Move it, sis. I’m going for the spot behind you.” Hange slips past you to sit on the couch right next to Levi’s other side. You back up so you’re sandwiched in between Hange’s legs, and you yawn with the added warmth. You had a fleeting thought of not being able to finish the movie before falling asleep. How right you were. You don’t even make it past Bella’s dream sequence, drifting off into your own little world. The smell of clean laundry and musky body wash permeates your senses as you do.

.

Levi isn’t even paying attention to the movie. Even if it was something he was interested in, his focus could not be kept on the screen. Levi felt like his heart was about to burst out of his chest as he felt the weight of you leaning against his bad leg. Your soft cheek pressed into his knee while you slept soundly. His joints have been aching for the last hour, but he would sooner touch fire before disturbing you. He couldn’t see your face very well from this angle, but he could only assume how peaceful you looked right now. Your hair is still in buns, but they were much messier than before from the activities of the day, hair falling every which way.

As you sighed softly in your sleep, his mind raced with everything that had happened today. From the ecstatic look in your eyes when you opened the front door to when you had gently cradled his head in your warm hands after hitting him on accident, making sure you didn’t hurt him. He still felt tingles of your touch shooting through his nervous system from that. And making cookies with you, he had more fun than he could admit. You were so meticulous and careful, albeit chaotic in your ways. He found it so endearing.

 Then that damn Erwin asking that stupid question. Erwin knew and still egged him on. Of course, it was you; you were the reason why his heart and stomach did flips whenever he heard his phone vibrate. He wouldn’t allow anyone to know that though, especially you. Not when you already seem so entwined in other people’s lives.

Levi hadn’t missed Furlan’s interest in you. His longtime friend often stated that he wanted to get to know you even more. Not to mention Furlan’s tactless ways of wanting to include you in everything he made plans to do. It seemed as if you weren’t aware of his intentions though, so maybe he wasn’t clear enough. Levi hopes you never pick up on it.

And of course, there was Miche. What kind of relationship did you have with him? Levi didn’t mishear how you had plans with him next week. And the intimate touching? What was that all about? The relationship with Miche did not seem romantic from his viewpoint, but then again.

Levi was never the jealous type, or so he thought. He found that any attention aimed at you ruffled him. What about you made him feel like this? He scoffs under his breath, not able to look away from the back of your head. Hange stops munching on the cookie in her hands and turns at the sound, now noticing you fast asleep on Levi’s knee.

“Want me to take her for you?” They whisper to Levi, shifting to stand up.

“No, it’s fine. I don’t want you to miss out on prime Eduardo and Beatrice or whoever the fuck these people are.” Levi waves his hand dismissively and carefully gets up, making sure to move your head so it doesn’t flop forward. “Which one is her room?” He asks as he stares down at Hange. They regard him in curiosity but smile regardless.

“The door with the sakuras on them.” Levi nods and bends down to effortlessly pick you up despite his smaller frame, cradling you as your head falls back. You’re deeply asleep at this point, he assumes, because you make no motion from the disturbance. Levi feels the stares from Furlan and Erwin as he steps over everyone to make it to the set of bedroom doors down the hall.

As he delicately places you on your bed, he starts to pull the soft comforter up to cover you but then you shift in your sleep, making him pause. With the confirmation of your sleep-induced heavy breathing, he pulls the blanket up the rest of the way and takes a long look at your soft features. The peace that radiated off your face was something he delighted in. How beautiful you were to him.

On his way out, he steps slowly to the door, being mindful of his surroundings as he goes. He spots a couple of framed pictures that littered your cluttered desk. One catches his eye in particular; It’s a photo of when you were very young, maybe 5 or so. He takes a step forward for a closer look, minding the creaking floorboards carefully. An unsettling feeling runs cold in his veins as he recognizes the family that surrounded you as well as the house in the background. He knew that family and he knew that house, and he came to realize he knew you as well.

A flashback hits him like a brick. One of him and the boy in the photo, your brother, playing outside until the sunset. Of you yelling for him with your small voice that it was time for dinner and that he needed to come home. Of your little pigtails completely askew as you cried after falling on the gravel due to a skateboard accident from when him and your brother tried to teach you how to balance on it. Of him giving you a flower to distract you from the pain and your bleeding kneecaps. Of having to move away because his good for nothing father threatened his mom and Levi had warned him to try. Of you and your family waving goodbye as he stared from the rear window, the view of your tear-streaked face getting smaller and smaller as his mom drove away.

He had forgotten all about you, and it seemed you had forgotten about him. A breath hitches in his throat and he turns to look back at you, your face scrunched up from a dream as you pull the blankets closer. No wonder he felt compelled to you, almost like he needed to protect you. With a soft sigh, he creeps slowly to the door and slips out before shutting it close behind him.

You roll over in your sleep, sighing again, the night of the fire haunting your dreams.

☾ Previous Chapter: January ☾ Next Chapter: March

[sturn-saturn]

back to my place

synopsis: you meet chris at the club on your trip to LA

a/n: guys this is my first time writing something sorry if it sucks i swear i tried my best im so shit at work but any feedback is appreciated <3 (not proofread)

my best friend hallie and i were born and raised in the east coast. we decided to take a trip to LA after our last semester of our junior year of college as a way to let lose and have fun leaving all our stress behind.

we've been watching the sturniolo triplets for about a year now. we made it a tradition to have a sleepover at my house every friday night and watch their weekly friday video. i will say i love them all but matt is definitely my favorite. i feel i relate to him in many ways.

i expected LA to be hot but i didn't know it would be this hot. walking down the street i decided to get my mom a coach bag for her birthday that's coming up soon. we stumbled upon a thrift shop and there was one dress that caught my eye. a silver sequin dress that has that has some sort of shoelace design in the middle as well as on the sides where my hips would be.

hallie take notice of my silence. "are you thinking what i'm thinking?" She says. "oh we are so going clubbing tonight" i say excitedly. i purchase the dress and we make our way back to our airbnb and immediately get ready. my best friend rummaged through her luggage and luckily found something that fit the same vibe as the dress i bought earlier.

──── ♡ ────

"holy fuck Hallie there's so many people." i mumbled as my best friend takes a hold of my hand leading me through the loud room blasting "slut me out 2" by NLE choppa.

"i know! that's what makes this so exciting, more guys, more fun" She giggles.

"please don't get pregnant tonight im begging."

she whips her heard around and laughs "sheesh what kind of girl do you take me for?"

we stumbled upon the bar and i decided to get a mojito. i didn't want to drink too much considering i was in a new place and wanted to be cautious of my surroundings.

i take the first sip and i feel the ice cold drink running down inside my throat.

"yup. this drink is exactly what i-" hallie cuts me off hitting my arm. "ow hallie what the fuck why are you-"

"dont look now im so serious please but chris and nick are here." she whispers into my ear.

"hallie we don't know a nick or a chris here." i laughed.

she looks me dead in the eyes and i almost choked on my drink finally understanding.

"s-shut the fuck up right now where?" i stutter.

"they're by the front door i think they're talking to someone"

i turn around to see where she's looking and i take a quick glance at the two brothers. "holy fuck chris is even finer in person."

──── ♡ ────

hallie and i finish up our drink and make our way to the dance floor as we hear the melodious tune of "don't stop the music" by rihanna fill our ears.

whipping my head back and forth i feel myself lose balance and bump into someone. "omg i am so sorry. are you okay, i should've been more carefu-"

"no you're okay, im okay. dont worry about it"

i look up to see a guy with shaggy hair, a black t shirt, black baggy jeans, and black jean jacket.

"chris."

"thats me" he smiles. "do i know you?"

"no but i love your content" i let out a small laugh

"thank you that means a lot. are you from around here?"

"nah my best friend hallie and i-" i turn around to point to her but i cant seem to find her. "she was just here but my best friend hallie and i are from jersey. we came for the week"

"how are you liking it?" he asks

"oh so far i'm loving it" i smirk at him

"you're very cute you know that?"

"mm so i've been told" i say looking up at the taller boy

"whats your name by the way?"

"y/n" i say

chris and i talk for a bit longer at the bar asking me questions about what im majoring in, what i wanna do with that, and so many other things. "so y/n, do you wanna get outta here? i have the house to myself."

i nod and he takes my hand in his.

──── ♡ ────

i head back to chris's house that he shares with his brothers and we make our way down to his room and i let out a giggle following behind him. he closes his door and locks it, just in case his brothers for some reason come back home.

he pushes me against the door and my purse immediately drops as he cups my cheek. i let out a shallow breath as his lips inch closer to mine. i tilt my head up, placing my fingers through his hair and he closes the gap. his lips as soft as pillows as his thumb caresses my cheek like i'm made of glass. he pulls apart and looks at me for a second seeing if there are any signs of discomfort.

"please" i whisper.

"what do you need y/n"

"your mouth" i let out as i rub my thighs together trying to create friction.

he pulls my arm and pushes me onto his bed. he rid himself of his black jean jacket as well as his t shirt.

"chris hurry please"

"oh you're a needy little thing aren't you"

i feel my cheeks heat up as he settles his body between my legs hovering over me.

"so who's your favorite triplet?" he smirks

"matt." i smirk back

"oh really?" he says in a husky voice looking down at my lips back to my eyes. "i can assure you i'll be your favorite by the end of the night sweetheart"

[glimmerlofsea]

Billy Hargrove x Reader

MASTERLIST

TINA'S SISTER

Warning : Cute one, perhaps? Enjoy ●ω● ah.. and I will make your character as clingy as possible.. so, if you are get uncomfy by girls who are too spoiled you can skip this! ;D.

WC; 2,1k

#TALKISSA; You are one year younger than Tina and Billy, the relationship you and Billy have is very interesting, since you are too childish, such a crybaby, rabid, and too clingy which makes Billy annoyed but on the other hand he is also curious. This is one of my Billy Hargrove's imagine on Wattpad.. If it's not satisfactory, I'm sorry because I'm not in the mood to start writing a new story again T____T

Your parents are never home most of the time, and you have just returned from studying away, to return to Hawkins you have to beg your parents to let you continue your final year studies where you live.

Summer is still on, which means Tina can throw parties to her heart's content and you can wander around Hawkins as much as you like to cure your homesickness.

You were walking back towards your house after walking around your old housing complex. It wasn't surprising that when you returned there were lots of young people hanging around. Tina throws another party. You start to get used to it and just walk past them- yes, you are bothered or even teased but you just keep quiet and give them the middle finger.

Usually after doing that you always chuckle a little, feeling like you are the coolest girl. Well, by far away school what is meant is that you are sent to a girls' boarding school. so you can't act as you please there.

You open your bedroom door and see a boy making out with a girl. You shouted, making the two people stop what they were doing,

"Not on my favorite sheets!" You shouted approaching your bed. The girl hurriedly put on her clothes and left the room to get away from trouble, leaving you with the boy.

You looked sharply at the boy who was checking up on you as if to ask himself who this girl was.

"What are you doing?!" You exclaimed, your shrill voice making him cover his ears.

He chuckled, walking closer to you, his tall body almost covering your shadow from the light in the room, "Damn it, we almost actually made out if you didn't ruin our moment."

You raised the corners of your lips to slam your jaw, "Well, you guys can fuck if it's not in my sheets?!"

"Jeez, it's just a sheet, why do you give a shit about that?"

You tighten your jaw, "It's not just a sheet, dickhead! It's a ghost busters' sheet."

The boy laughed, "Such a freak." Then leave you.

Hearing what he said, you couldn't accept it, you took the lipstick you had and aimed at his head. As soon as you throw it, it hits his head! Makes you smile proudly.

"What the fuck-" He groaned then turned his body back to look at you, "What's that for?!"

"I'm practicing aiming for my basketball practice... You know, putting it in the hoop?" You acted stupid while scratching the back of your head.

Again and again he chuckled, walking closer to you, "Who the fuck are you? Do you know who I am?"

"What? You some kind of mullet charmer or something?" You mocked him.

The boy turned his face away, he was starting to see that this girl was a problem that would really drain his patience and invite his anger. Exhausting.

"Billy?"

You heard Tina's voice and peeked behind the young boy, "Hey, sissy!"

Tina groaned, "Ugh, shut up, Y/N." Tina grabbed Billy by the collar of his sleeve, "C'mon, we need our keg king."

You frowned, "What is keg king? Is that like cousins of Stephen King?"

"Shut up." Tina said before closing your door tightly.

"Couldn't you have done that while I was gone?!" You groaned and threw yourself on your bed, annoyed that Tina always forgot to lock your room so no one could come in while she was partying.

A few days later you decide to buy your stationery for school, for some reason you feel very excited about school.

When you get home the house is quiet, you see a note on the refrigerator,

"I'm out of town with

friends. Bye, bitch."

There is a message written there from Tina, that she went out of town with her friends which makes you surprised, they haven't even got a job yet but have dared to go out of town?

You shrugged your shoulders and went back up to your room. You hum a song and open your room,

"Hey, there, long time no-"

You screamed at an invisible figure and then threw the stationery you bought at the source of the sound.

That invisible figure was heard groaning in pain, "Ouch!"

You turn on the light in your room and see the figure of the same boy a few days ago.

"Why do you like throwing stuff at me so much?!" he shouted.

You smiled awkwardly feeling a little guilty, "Because you're really throw-able..?"

At first he frowned, but remembering his first meeting where you acted weirdly he would get used to it, "Tina's gone, right?"

You picked up your equipment back on the scattered floor and answered his words, "Yeah." You didn't expect that he would also help you pick up fallen items.

"Thanks." You said as you finished putting it back on the table.

"Okay.. I'm really blinded so what's your purpose here? Are you going to kill me 'cause you're upset at my behavior last week?" You said landing yourself on the bed and narrowing your eyes at him.

He chuckled, "Maybe. You got some knife?"

"In the drawer." You replied pointing towards your drawer.

His face stiffened, "Wait- You fucking kidding me? Girls like you have some-"

"Gosh, I'm joking." You chirped with a small laugh showing your neat, medium sized teeth.

He landed himself next to you, "May I?"

"Well... You've already landed your ass so what can I do." You replied, getting a smile from him.

"Aren't you afraid?" he asked.

You looked at him, "Afraid of what?"

"That I'm going to fuck you right now since it's just the two of us in the house?"

You were silent for a moment and smiled,

"What are you smiling at?" He asked sounding displeased.

"Wait... I thought you're just joking...?"

He let out a chuckle slowly, "God, you're a handful to deal with. And so innocent... Indeed you're such a freak." He said getting up from the bed.

"Weirdo." You reply.

"Huh?"

"Don't call me freak. It sounds rude, dude."

He rolled his eyes, "Whatever, you are Tina's sister?"

You nod,

"Starting the final year of school next month?" He asked and again you nodded.

"Then you're one younger than me, ay?" His reply approached you. He bent his body slightly to examine you with his eyes.

You started to feel nervous and gripped the sheets tightly,

He smiled and was about to break the distance between you but you avoided it by immediately standing up, making him almost lose his balance.

"I- I'll get you some water because you're my guest, right?" You said laughing awkwardly.

You could hear him chuckle in annoyance, "Do you have a beer?"

You shook your head,

"Then, I'm leaving."

He comes out of your room and you just stay silent, what is that? Why did it pass so quickly? You don't even know his name yet. What kind of atmosphere are you in that night? And he almost kissed you? Oh, wow.

Three months passed very quickly, you knew his name just because you heard several students talking about their senior from High School. Billy Hargrove. His name.

You think it would be better if you finish school quickly, the sights you have to pass by while walking in the corridor are seeing couples making out and sometimes you see the guy being aggressive. Makes you groan in disgust.

A boy- with red spots invites you to come to a party.

But the party didn't go well, the night wind hit your face, which after crying made your face stiff and cold. Along the way, without a lift, without a jacket covering your body, you cried non-stop.

Until you hear the sound of a car engine driving beside you softly, "Hey!"

You turned around still sniffling from your tears, "Leave me alone, Billy Hargrove."

He chuckled, trying to match his gas pedal with your stride, "You know my name."

"Congratulations, you're fucking famous." You replied, still choking on your tears.

"Get in." he said.

"Leave me alone."

"Or I'll take your virginity."

You immediately looked at him in disbelief, "What the hell is that?" You said between tears.

"I won't repeat it twice."

You wiped your tears with your hands and got into his car. It smells like... Cigarettes. Well, he's a smoker so... Smells of cigarettes.

You tried to hold back your tears by pulling at the mucus in your nose. Billy groaned in disgust but he didn't want to make you cry even more.

Billy saw your nose and almost your entire face which was red from crying, he handed you some tissues and you took them. Billy thought you would use it to expel your mucus, but he was wrong, your cries got louder, making Billy pull over on the road and cover your mouth.

"Hey! Motherfucker what is wrong with you?! I'm trying to help you and then I get this?! You want me to be arrested by the police because of your drama shouting?"

Hearing him shout suddenly made you pause and look at him, you tried to hold back your tears.

Billy sighed, "Tell me what's going on."

"And breathe." He said again placing his hand on your thigh. That's when he realized you were only wearing a black thigh-length dress. Like dressing for a party.

"I came to a party... Invited by a boy with freckles... Don't know his name..." Billy tried to listen carefully even though you were telling the story while choking on your tears.

"At the party I tried to blend in... But I couldn't blend in!" You exclaimed again and then groaned, crying because you remembered how bad you were for mingling with them.

Billy sighed tired of your attitude, "Such a crybaby." He said then gently stroked your thigh, "Tell me what's next."

You took a breath, "Then... A guy approached me, know that I'm Tina's sister, the fuck he tried to touch me," Hearing that, Billy's caressing at your thigh stopped, his face became flat, his anger was really real, burning but not because of you, but because of guy who tried to touch you, "Trying to sleep with me.. I'm a little scared but-"

"Did you fuck him?" Billy asked.

"What? No! No. Listen to me first." you whined. Billy was really tired of facing you, he rolled his eyes and nodded, "Go on."

"I pushed him away, and he screamed at me, he told me that my sister was a better whore than me."

"He's right.." Billy whispered but you could hear him, you frowned, "What?!"

"No. Nothing. Did I say something?"

Seeing that you are already sensitive makes him play stupid.

You forgot about it and continued your story, "I didn't like the way he said that about Tina. I slapped him right then and there. I didn't mean it, but it just happened, when I wanted to say sorry then he slapped me."

"What?" Billy exclaimed, you looked at him and nodded, looking from there Billy you answered, "I know right! He must have thought I was strong enough to withstand his slap and I appreciate that-"

"Fuck, Y/N. No time for your stupidity. He's fucking slapped you!"

Seeing Billy starting to feel angry made you remember confused, "Okay... I'm not finished yet."

"God, make this your final year thesis."

You widened your eyes, thanks to Billy's words you got a glimpse of your final assignment, "You're so clever!" You exclaimed then got up from your chair to kiss his cheek.

Billy was surprised by the electric touch you gave him, and so were you...

"Sorry, just to... Um, excited?"

He chuckled, "Keep telling your story, or I'll seriously lay into you."

That way you immediately retell it, "Then a girl appeared next to me and slapped me again. She said, you are messing with my boyfriend, you are messing with me." You mocked her tone.

"I'm really confused! If he has a girlfriend and she is his girlfriend why would she let her boyfriend tempt me to sleep with him? Then I told her, he tried to sleep with me and you still want to be his?"

You took a breath, "THEN SHE SLAPPED ME AGAIN RIGHT ON MY LEFT CHEEK AND-"

As much as Billy wanted to hear the rest of your story but he really had to stopped you, he immediately kissed you and grabbed your neck to deepen the kiss.

Where one of Billy's hands was around your neck then the other wandered around to find your waist, you held his cheeks with both of your hands.

His kiss wasn't too hot or rough... But gentle enough to make the butterflies in your stomach dance with joy.

You and Billy pulled each other to steal your breath, you laughed in amusement, he smiled, "Perhaps you've had a rough day, but I'm here to turn things around and make you feel good."

Billy's words made you smile, "Would you believe me if I said you were my first kiss?"

"Hell, nah."

You smiled, "Yeah. You're my first kiss, surprise. I'm a good kisser, right?" You said flipping your hair.

"Oh, save that for later, Miss. I still have lots of surprises for you from my delicious lips."

You clenched your jaw, "Shut up, I haven't even graduated yet, Billy." You said choking.

"I have to wait a year then?"

"If you patient enough," you replied, raising your eyebrows, he chuckled,

"Will you take me home?" You asked, he was determined, "With pleasure, My Lady." He kissed your forehead in return.

"Ah, and toss me a rundown of what this dude looks like, would ya?"

"What are you going to do with him?"

"Gonna teach this shit a lesson or two."

Author Note : My head's like about to explode... With school and everything, and my fanfic ideas are kinda stuck, sorry if I'm late updating the new story, Issea! Soooo, I'm gonna plan out making a masterlist first! Hope y'all been diggin' my stories so far! ♥ω♥

[zxxccx]

Don't Take Too Long

This is a work of fiction. All characters are 18+. Contains male fart fetish, piss, and scat content.

Senior year was almost over. We were all looking forward to being done with high school and the end was in sight. We just had a few more random assignments left, finals, and then graduation. I was sitting in class one day and went to get my homework out of my backpack. After looking for a bit, I realized I didn't have it and must have left it in my locker. So, I got up and asked the teacher for the hall pass so that I could get it. As I was walking out of the classroom, one of my classmates named Josh called out to me. Josh was your typical gym bro and had a big ass. I turned to see what he wanted and he said, “Don't take too long, I have to take a massive dump.” I looked at him with a mix of confusion and disgust. After a few seconds, his friend Joe who was sitting behind him said, “What are you wanting for? You heard him, hurry up!” And with that I left and tried put that weird interaction out of my mind. Why did jocks think that poop and fart jokes are so funny?

My high school was actually a small campus with multiple buildings on it. Of course, given how life works, my locker was in a completely different building than the one my class was in. So, it took me a while to get to my locker, get my homework, and walk back. And let's be honest, I was a senior in high school so it's not like I was exactly in a rush to get back to class. When I did get back to the classroom, I was surprised to see Josh standing outside, almost like he was waiting for me. “I thought I told you not to take too long. You think it's funny for me to me have to sit there and hold it in while I wait for you to get back with the hall pass? You're lucky the teacher’s chill and let me out anyway.” I didn't think I had done anything wrong, but wanting to avoid conflict I apologized anyway. Apparently that wasn't good enough for Josh though because he told me sorry wasn't going to cut it and that he thought I needed to be taught a lesson. He told me to follow him and then grabbed my arm and started leading me down the hallway. I tried to say something but he told me to shut up and said that if I tried to make a scene I'd regret it. He was significantly stronger than me so I figured it was in my best interest to listen.

Finally, Josh pulled me into the bathroom. I was very confused at this point but, before I could ask what was going on, Josh shoved to the ground and forced me to lie on my back on the grimey bathroom floor. I went to sit up and tell him off, but he held me down, spun around, and sat his ass on my face. This made me try to protest even harder (even though my protests were heavily muffled by his ass), but Josh reacted by simply ripping a nasty fart on my face. It smelled absolutely disgusting and made me gag. All of the sudden, I heard the bathroom door open. I started freaking out because I didn't want anyone to see me like this, but it turned out to just be Joe. Based on his reaction, him and Josh both found my current position to be hilarious. “Damn, can't believe we're actually gonna fucking do this to him. It's gonna be so nasty!”, Joe said.

I had no idea what he was talking about, but I wasn't kept in the dark for long. While still sitting on my face, Josh explained their plan: “I was pretty pissed when you took your fucking time coming back with the hall pass after I told you I needed to shit. So, Joe and I got to talking and we decided you needed to learn the error of your ways.” Josh paused for a second, pulled down the back of his shorts and boxers, and slammed his bare ass down on my face. I was caught completely off guard by this and unwittingly took a breath in through my nose. His ass smelled awful. He continued, “Now I'm sure you're already having a rough time down there, but I don't think you realize how much it sucks to be you right now. Ya see, I haven't taken my dump yet and you're in a pretty unfortunate spot. I was originally just planning to shit on your face and leave you to deal with that, but then Joe said it would be even better if I shat in your mouth and made you eat it. I thought that was the most disgusting thing I'd ever heard, but I decided it was too good of an opportunity to pass up on. If we're doing this to teach you a lesson, might as well make sure it sticks. But in all seriousness, there are two reasons we're gonna do this to you. First, it'll be fucking hilarious and will probably scar you for life, and second…because we can.”

I was horrified. There's no way I would let this happen. I started squirming as much as I could to try to get away. They both found this hilarious. I was no match for Josh's body weight though and only succeeded in tiring myself out and making myself sniff Josh's rank ass more. I decided I had to try to scream for help. Unfortunately, that idea ended up working against me. Not only was I not able to get any meaningful noise out from under Josh's ass, but the minute I opened my mouth, he spread his cheeks and firmly pressed has asshole down over my mouth. This resulted in my mouth being locked open by his body weight with my lips sealed around his hole. I felt like my skull was going to crack from the pressure. “Bad move buddy”, Josh said with a laugh. He punctuated that thought with a massive fart that echoed in my mouth. I gagged and started to struggle again. “If you thought that was bad, you're really not going to like what's coming”, he added, ”Hope you're hungry, because I'm about to burst!” Him and Joe started laughing again. He ripped a few more farts into my mouth and I felt like my taste buds were going to burn off. Tears rolled down my cheeks as I began to accept my fate.

Then, it happened, I felt Josh's asshole start to expand. “Here it comes”, he said while grunting. He continued to push and a large turd started to slide into my mouth. Nothing could have prepared me for the taste when it first touched my tongue. It was absolutely rancid - very bitter and slimy with earthy notes as well. I thought I was going to be sick, but Josh kept pushing and next thing I know I felt the log start to slide down my throat. “Look you can see his throat bulging. This is awesome!”, Joe said. He sounded thrilled. As the turd slid further down my throat, Josh and Joey continued to talk and crack jokes at my expense. Meanwhile, I was being completely defiled and the two of them could care less. Finally, after another minute of pushing, the end of the turd came out of Josh's ass. Most of it was already down my throat, but part of it was still in my mouth.

Josh told me to swallow it, because there was more to come. I didn't know if I'd be able to bring myself to do that but then, as if he was reading my mind, Joe told me that if I puked they'd make me eat that too. Seeing no other options, I forced myself to swallow the turd. Josh and Joe were elated by this. Josh continued to take his dump as if I were just a toilet. Apparently he wasn't joking when he said he had to take a massive dump. Over the course of what felt like ten minutes, he forced two more sizable turds down my throat followed by one smaller one. My stomach felt really full with all his shit. Then, to add insult to injury, he told me he wouldn't get up until I licked his asshole clean which resulted in my tongue getting up close and personal with his shit once again. When I finally thought it was over, Josh had one more surprise in store. He told me he was feeling generous and wanted to help wash the taste out of my mouth. He then pulled out his dick, aimed it at my mouth, and told me I better open up if I didn't want to go around smelling like piss the rest of the day. His piss was acrid and unpleasant, but nowhere near as bad as his shit.

Josh finally got up and I just laid there. I couldn't bring myself to move. I was relieved that this ordeal was finally over. That relief was short lived though when I looked up and saw Joe holding his phone with the camera pointing at me. He had filmed the whole thing! They both found it funny how horrified I was. After capturing my reaction Joe put his phone away. I went to sit up and beg him to delete the video, but he pushed me back down. “Who said you're done?”, he asked. “Lunch didn't agree with me today and Josh shouldn't be the only one who gets to have fun. Hope you saved room for dessert!” I started freaking out again, but he was easily able to hold me in place and I eventually ended up with him sitting his bare ass down on my face. I wasn't about to let them put me through that again, so I refused to open my mouth. A swift hit to my nuts took care of that though, and once again I found myself in a familiar position filled with dread.

Like Joe said, whatever he had for lunch was not sitting well with him. This resulted in his dump being a lot less solid than Josh’s. He began with some wet farts before I was presented with a mouthful of mush. The texture alone made me gag and the taste made me wish I didn't have taste buds. After making me swallow that, I was presented with two more mouthfuls that were pretty similar to the first. Joe's “grand finale” really took the cake though and made me regret thinking things couldn't get any worse. His final push filled my mouth to the brim with liquid diarrhea. It almost overflowed, but the seal between his asshole and my mouth was too tight. Realizing what just happened, Joe burst out laughing and then told me not to swallow under threat of Josh standing full weight on my balls. As much as I wanted to get the disgusting liquid out of my mouth, I did as I was told. Joe, then ordered me to swish his shit around like it was mouthwash and really take in the flavor. I didn't want to, but Josh starting to put pressure on my balls with his foot helped persuade me. I hated every second of it until they finally let me swallow. Joe also made me lick his asshole clean, but didn't give me the “courtesy” of rinsing out my mouth with piss like Josh did.

After he stood up, before pulling up his pants, Joe said they should see how good I did at cleaning his asshole. He picked up the homework I had dropped and wiped his ass with it. When he was done, it had a large streak of shit on it. “Whelp, guess someone's getting a zero. Hopefully you'll do a better job next time”, he said. He crumpled up the homework and threw it in the trash. As I got up, I shuddered at the idea of there being a next time. I wanted to run into the nearest stall and puke or at the very least rinse my mouth out with water from the sink, but the two of them where insistent that it was important for me to savor the flavor and fully digest their loads. They made me walk back to class with them and I was surprised that the teacher didn't question the fact that we all came back together or were gone for so long. When asked about my homework, I didn't want to give Josh and Joe an excuse to torture me more, so I just said I couldn't find it.

Fortunately, the two of them actually left me alone for the rest of the school year and never forced me to go through that again. I guess they had their fun and were done with me. They still did manage to get one more blow in though. One night, I got a text from an unknown number telling me that I had been gifted a video from a pay-per-view porn site. I initially thought it was spam, but curiosity got the better of me and I clicked the link. I was completely shocked to see it was the video of Josh using me as a toilet. His face was blurred and his and Joe's voices were altered, but it was still clear exactly what was happening. It was awful seeing myself in that position and having to relive the moment. But the biggest surprise came at the end of the video. When Josh finally got up, my face wasn't blurred and when I begged Joe to stop filming my voice wasn't altered. I felt a pit in my stomach and started to cry. I couldn't believe that this was out there. I looked at the profile that uploaded it and saw they had a second video available for purchase. Based on the thumbnail, I could tell it was my shitty experience with Joe.

All of the sudden, my phone rang. It was the unknown number. Nervously, I picked up. It was Joe. He asked me if I liked the video. I begged him to take both videos down, but he said not a chance. He also told me that if I ever told anyone about what him and Josh did to me, he would make sure everyone I knew saw the videos. He ended the call by telling me that he hopes I never forget the experience and that if I ever wanted to taste his shit again, all I have to do is call. I cried myself to sleep that night. I was glad when graduation came, because it meant that I didn't have to see Josh and Joe every day anymore since I went to a different college than them. But when I was home during breaks, if I ran into either of them while I was out, they would give me knowing grins and brag about how much money they made from the videos they posted. That combined with recurring nightmares in which I was back in that bathroom with them meant that the experience was a constant presence in the back of my mind. I would always remember what had happened and I would never forget the vile taste.

[redheadloverr]

High school AU

gn!reader x xiao

contents; strangers to friends to lovers, age gap, mentions of bullying.

a bit late but in honor of xiao’s bday here this is :)

You were never a quiet kid but you also weren’t the loudest in the class. you were a good neutral, talked when you needed to, didn’t speak if it wasn’t necessary. it was very unusual for you to seek people out or even have an interest in anyone. People noticed you gazing at the upperclassman Xiao, they thought you were going insane or something. of all upperclassmen, you chose Xiao. Xiao was known around campus as the grumpy emo loner, to think you of all students would have a crush on him. now that, that’s a bizarre pair. You didn’t mind, however. if anything, it was comforting. he was like you, the younger you that you’ve been able to hide so well. you wanted to get to know him more, get to know his story more. you guys only had a class together and it was almost impossible to figure out where he hides out during lunch. but you were determined to figure out who he really is, figure out if you two can be friends.

You went to all the basic loner hideouts, library, favorite teacher classroom, outside corners that only a couple students know of, the bleachers, everywhere. you even thought about going to the bathroom to look for him, thankfully the bell rang before you could actually work the courage to walk into the bathroom. Your next class was the only class you had with Xiao, so it was almost perfect timing. it was band, the weirdest yet most comforting class for a loner. Middle school you would be ecstatic to be in band but now, even though you enjoy it, it’s not giving you a good look. You were thankful you had it though, it’s bringing you closer to xiao. Thankfully, you two were in the same section. he still didnt talk much even in band which was odd to you but it still oddly made sense to you. Since Xiao is an upperclassmen, you decided you would try to ask him for some help as a way to get him to talk to you. From there you’d try your best to bring up other topics you think he knew about or that others have spread rumors about him liking.

“Hi, sorry to bother you but i have a question over this note and how to play it correctly, do you think you can help me?” You felt dumb for the way you phrased you’re question but it got Xiao’s attention. He didn’t give you a reply back though, he simply nodded and walked to your instrument with you. He looked over your music sheet and finally spoke. “Ah, we have the same note here. Its played like this” he says before going to his own instrument to show you how its done. You knew how to play the note already but hearing him talk finally and seeing him play his instrument was like a hidden secret in a game you didn't know was there. You're so glad you’re able to see this, see him, hear his voice after you’ve had such a crush on him for a long time. “How about you try it now? Hearing you play it might help me estimate how to help you.” His words took you out of your trance, it gave you an idea though. If you played well enough maybe he’d have his eye on you, So you did just that, you played to the best of your ability in hopes that he’d be surprised by you or maybe decide you need more work and take you under his wing. “That was good, still needs some work but for a first year it isn't bad. I think the other upperclassmen in our section have other students their teaching so i guess you’ll be stuck with me for a bit. I hope you don’t mind that.” “OF COURSE NOT!” you said it so instantly you had to slap your mouth shut. You thought Xiao would think of you as a weirdo, or a moron, but he laughed. He actually, genuinely, laughed. You made him laugh. You couldn't believe it, you may even be the first to hear his laugh. “You’re a strange one, I'm not one to speak to others at school but maybe you're be an exception.” Before you could even reply to him, the bell rings and he leaves you to pack his stuff. “W-wait, Xiao” you rush to him hoping for even a sliver of his attention. he doesn't respond but he turns to you as he continues packing, “So do you want to meet up after school or how exactly are you going to help me with the music?” he again doesn't say anything but he looks at you then pulls out a pen and paper from his backpack. “Here, my number. I’ll text you when I'm free, just make sure to text me first so I can save your number.” The bell rings, a warning that you have another two minutes to run to your class. “You should probably get running, wouldn't want to be the reason you're late to class haha. Good luck freshy, see you next class.” He waves to you as he walks out of the band room and off campus. God your crush for him just grew ten times. You had two other classes to get to and then you could send him a text. You couldn’t stop thinking about your interaction with him for the rest of the school day however. You couldn’t wait to get out of classes and text him.

After school, you ran to meet up with your best friend and tell her all about what happened. “GANYU! GANYU! YOU’LL NEVER GUESS WHAT HAPPEEND” you came up to her panting as she looked at you worried. “What happened Y/N? Why are you running? Calm down before you speak” Ganyu was a year older than you but you two have been friends since middle school, she was the only person who would talk to you when everyone else would pick on you for being the class loner. She’s the sweetest person you know and better yet she knows Xiao. Apparently, her and Xiao kinda grew up together and she speaks very highly of him, though they’ve grown apart, they both look after each other. “I TALKED TO XIAO. HE GAVE ME HIS NUMBER, HE TOLD ME TO TEXT HIM. C’MON GANYU WE GOTTA GO I GOTTA TEXT HIM” before she could even reply you grabbed her hand and started dragging her along with you. You’re home wasn’t far from the school so you two arrived there pretty quickly. You two quickly ran to your room closing the door behind you. “What do i say to him? do i just say hi this is Y/N from band let me know when you’re free so we can practice? is that too lengthy?” “Wait, he’s helping you with band practice?” Ganyu stares at you. “Yeah, he said he’d text me when he’s free but since he doesn’t have my number i should send him a text first.” you explain to ganyu. “I see, hmm maybe just say ‘hey it’s Y/N just texting you so you know who it is’ and maybe put a smiley face or something” she nudges you. “Stop it Ganyu you know i can’t do that, but maybe i’ll send it without the smiley face haha.” and you do just that, you send a text saying ‘Hello this is Y/N, text me when you’re free for our band practices, thank you.’ and show ganyu the text “Here let me see it real quick Y/N” you hand ganyu the phone and instantly regret it. She sent the smiley face… she sent the dang smiley face. it was over. she sent it, there was no going back. to your surprise, he responded almost instantly. since the two of you were playing games, Ganyu saw he texted you. “Uh Y/N, Xiao texted back.” you look at her. “He what?” You quickly rush to your phone almost dropping it out of your hands. you read it out loud for ganyu. “Hey, i might be free tomorrow after school if you want to practice. let me know.” “GANYU, WHAT DO I SAY” ganyu quickly places her hand on your shoulder. “Calm down, just say you’re free and set up a time with him.” You do as ganyu suggest and you both agree on meeting up at 5pm. Ganyu leaves shortly after and you’re left alone to think of what just happened. you had managed to not only talk to your crush but also text your crush and plan a practice with him. you were so excited for tomorrow.

You could barely sleep last night but you managed to get a bit of shut eye, you walked halfway to school to meet up to ganyu. though ganyu was waiting for you, so was xiao. “Hey, Y/N! sorry for such short notice but Xiao’s joining us on our walk today. he woke up a bit later than usual and i caught him just in time.” she winked at you. “I see, hi xiao, i’m glad you’ll be joining us haha..” you were a bit awkward but you managed to keep your cool. “hey, sorry to intrude on your walk haha” “no worries!” you quickly say to him. “okay cmon guys let’s go!” ganyu says dragging both of you with her. Ganyu was so energetic it almost hurt, you could see xiao smile a bit out of the corner of your eyes. it made you really happy seeing him smile. The three of you made casual convo on your way to school, ganyu and you did most of the talking but ganyu brought up a lot of childhood memories she had with xiao. she even brought up how she was struggling to hang out with both of you during middle school. you two laughed and joked and you could see xiao getting a little laugh out of your conversations as well. sadly, you guys were at the school gate within minutes. “Well, my classes are this way so i’ll catch you guys later” Ganyu says and quickly rushes to her class. “Which way are you going?” Xiao asks. “This way, i have english first class.” “I’ll walk you there.” Xiao says almost instantly and begins to walk ahead of you. You were a little stunned by his response, Xiao. a upperclassmen. walking you. “Wait, Xiao” you say almost regretting what you’re about to say. he stops and looks back at you with a confused face. “Maybe we shouldn’t walk together, not that i don’t want to! i really would but wouldn’t it look weird for an uperclassmen to walk an underclassmen to their class? especially if they aren’t like… dating or something like that?” you gulp, hoping he’ll confess to you or something but knowing he wouldn’t. “I don’t mind, i’m just walking a friend to class, nothing wrong with it. as long as you don’t mind, i just want to make sure you get there safely.” you feel a little disappointed after hearing that but you just agree for him to walk you. After you make it to your class, Xiao sticks around and talks to you until the bell rings. you two actually spoke a lot and found out you two had a lot of similar interests. you walked into class after he left feeling happy. you still had after school practice with him too. for the next week you repeated this cycle, you walked to school regularly with xiao and ganyu. xiao contributed more to the conversations, you two hung out alone more outside of practice, you two even went out with ganyu to lunch after school. everything was great, you were happy to have xiao as a friend even if that was all you two could ever be.

Time passed and your feelings for him developed even more. you were starting to wonder if you could really go on just being his friend. you asked ganyu about it, asked if you should confess or just keep it in. of course, ganyu said you should confess, she said xiao even looked interested in you. so you went for it. you asked xiao to meet you after school saying ganyu would be there but ganyu wasn’t. you two met outside your favorite after school dinner, you waited there anxiously until you saw xiao come up. “Hey, Y/N. is ganyu still on the way?” “Hey xiao. uhm i actually have something to tell you. can we talk over there?” you pointed at a nearby parks swing set. he nods and you two walk there. “So, what did you want to talk about?” Xiao asks as soon as you two get on the swings. he started swinging a little so it seemed like he was extremely uninterested. “Xiao. i like you. I’ve liked you for a while now. I asked for help and after school practice just to get closer to you. I thought it would be fine to just be friends with you but i can’t. i’m sorry, i know you might not see me that way but-“ he cut you off. “Y/N. i like you too. i’ve also liked you for a bit, maybe not as long as you’ve liked me but still. i’ve liked you even before you came up to me, i just never had the courage to talk to you. I like you a lot, Y/N. you beat me to confessing. I was planning on confessing to you tomorrow after school but here we are.” you blush and giggle at him, “really? you were going to confess tomorrow?” “Yeah, me and ganyu were talking about it and had a couple things planned haha. I was going to ask you to be my significant other.” you gasped a little under your breathe. “So, will you be my s/o, Y/N?” he asks. “Yes, a thousand times yes!!” he chuckles and gets up to hug you. you two spend a bit more time talking at the park before he starts walking you home. it was dark already so he didn’t want to let you go alone. “I should probably let you go now, i’ll see you tomorrow before school,okay?” you nod as xiao let’s go of your hand. “I’ll text you when i get home, bye, Y/N” you say bye and wave xiao off, quickly going inside and texting ganyu about everything that happens. once xiao gets home, he texts you and you two go back and fourth before he asks if you two could call. he ends up falling asleep on call and you end up hanging up so his phone doesn’t blow up haha. you had a blast today, and you couldn’t wait to see him again tomorrow.

The next few weeks seemed like heaven, Xiao was the sweetest boyfriend ever. he was very caring and generous, he worried for your safety, health, comfort and so much more. nothing much changed around ganyu though, you two weren’t too couple like around her, you two just remained being her best friend. it was nice, it was really nice to see Xiao lighten up a little. of course, people judged you two a bit, and asked why you would even like someone like xiao but you didn’t care. you were the happiest with xiao and ganyu’s undivided support was amazing. you enjoyed being with xiao and not having to choose between your best friend and boyfriend.

A/N i know this is a bit lengthy i’m sorry about that, this is kind of all over the place as well, i’ve had writers block for so long as well as school and what not consuming all my time but i hope you enjoyed this! also xiao is meant to be a junior, ganyu a sophomore, and reader a freshman!

[lilacella]

This is the smut free version of this chapter. If you would prefer to read the spicy version click here.

This chapter and the next one will be lil angsty, so brace yourself if you have to. I promise you, everything will be resolved

Nightsky

Chapter 5: It's rotten work

First Previous Next

Remus awoke to the sounds of the birds singing by the window. Just that the birds happened to be pigeons and were making quite a ruckus.

He squinted his eyes in annoyance and tried to get back to sleep, in vain. He sighed and tilted his head to see if Sirius was awake too, but he was still sleeping peacefully on Remus chest. A strand of his black hair had fallen accross his face. He looked so adorable, Remus could barely stop himself from grabbing his head to cover it in kisses. But he couldn't wake Sirius up. The man deserved his sleep.

The past year had been pretty strenuous for Sirius. Cursebreaker training was hard, even for him and he rarely got the opportunity to sleep in, like today.

Remus begann to gently stroke his boyfriends hair. He would never get used to how soft it was. Touching it made Remus hands feel tingly, it was absurd.

He loved moments like that, especially now that the time he got to spend with Sirius had become more sparse. Some days they didn't even get to see eachother at all, because Sirius was so busy. "It would be easier if you just moved in with me," Sirius would suggest lightheartedly everytime Remus complained about missing him. But Remus didn't want that.

Not that Sirius London maisonette apartment wasn't nice. It really was. And quite tastefully furnished as well. Maybe that was what made Remus always feel a little out of place between all the muted cream colors and minimalistic decor. Sirius had asked him for his opinions when decorating the flat but Remus had shut him down everytime. It wasn't right. This was Sirius place, not his so Sirius should pick what he liked.

So Remus still lived with his father and only stayed over occasionally. Usually when Sirius had a free day coming up.

Sirius started shifting, waking up and blinked at him sleepily.

"Morning," he mumbled.

"Morning, love," Remus responded fondly. Sirius shuffled up so his head was next to Remus'.

"Slept well?"

Remus hummed affirmatively. "Until the bloody pigeons woke me up." He gestured at the window.

"Hmmm London, innit?"

"Got to love it." They shared a chuckle. Sirius gently kissed his cheek. Remus felt his warm breath on his ear.

"Breakfast?"

After they had finally peeled themselves out of bed they both showered and went down the spiral staircase to the open kitchen and living area downstairs.

"What are you in the mood for?" Sirius asked while checking the contents of the pantry.

Remus shrugged. "Whatever you got. I'll make some tea." Sirius shot him a smile and proceeded to pull out eggs and bacon from the cabinet.

"Got any plans for today?" He asked while filling up the kettle.

Sirius shook his head. "I'm all yours."

Remus smiled. "That's nice. We don't get that often."

Sirius stepped over and wrapped his arms around him from behind, resting his chin on Remus shoulder.

"I'm sorry. It will get better once I'm done with training, I promise."

Remus stroked his hands gently. "It's fine, I understand. I just miss you when you're gone."

Sirius pressed a tender kiss to his neck. "I miss you too, Moons." He gently nuzzled Remus neck. "You know, it would be easier if..."

"No," Remus interrupted him gentle but firmly.

"Why not?" Sirius pulled back, a little frustrated. "I really don't understand why you're so adamant about living with your dad. I mean, don't get me wrong, he's great but...I mean it's been almost a year."

"I told you, I cannot afford the rent."

"And I already told you that I can cover it!"

"And I don't want that! So stop pressing already." The kettle began to whistle and they glared at each other quietly.

"Fine." Sirius said, pointedly and began passive aggressively slapping bacon into a pan.

Breakfast had been tense but their mood got better after taking a little stroll through the nearby park. It had become one of their favorite spots, Remus enjoyed the little green refuge between swathes of apartment buildings and the bustling streets of London and Sirius loved watching the ducks in the pond. They sat down on one of the benches and enjoyed the warm summer air.

Sirius brushed his fingers against Remus' and Remus took his hand, squeezing it lightly to signal, that things were okay. Sirius relaxed a little next to him.

"So how is the job hunt going?"

Remus sighed. He'd liked to avoid that topic.

"Not well. There just aren't many jobs where it doesn't matter if you're absent one week every month." Sirius grimaced.

"Sorry."

"Not your fault." They fell back into silence for a moment, before Remus continued. "I might be able to get a part time job at the book store in our village. The owner knew me since I was a child so I don't think he views me as much of a danger...But I don't know how much he'll be able to pay me."

Sirius perked up. "But that sounds good, doesn't it? Working in a bookshop. Sounds like something you'd like."

Remus laughed. "I am more than just a bookworm, Sirius. I've got other intrests as well."

"And what would that be," Sirius teased.

"Well I find the creatures of the bog quite fascinating and I do read a lot about..."

"Exactly my point. You read."

Remus rolled his eyes but couldn't quite argue with that. He slid down a little and dropped his head on Sirius shoulder who immediately leaned against him in return.

**

"Why are you so mad?"

"I'm not mad."

"You act like it." Sirius crossed his arms and leaned against the kitchen counter. They had just returned from a bar, it had supposed to be a date. But on his way back from the bathroom, some - very good looking - guy had chatted Sirius up. Sirius had turned him down but the short interaction and the way the guy had looked at Sirius ass while he walked back to their table had been enough to set Remus off. He hadn't meant to say anything but Sirius had noticed his bad mood and pressed until he had. And now they were here. Fighting once more.

"I didn't even do anything," Sirius said.

"I didn't say that you did."

"Then why are you like that? The entire fucking evening. You know how annoying that is?"

"Well I am sorry my presence ruined our date night."

"That is not what I said," Sirius barked back, angrily. "You are behaving as if it's my fault that guy hit on me."

"No. I don't think that. I am merely...," Remus let out a breath of frustration. "You should have talked to him."

"What?!"

"Well, yeah. You always say that you don't want anyone else but you never really talk to anyone but me right? So how can you now?"

Sirius stared at him in utter disbelief mixed with a hint of desperation.

"What the fuck Remus. What is that supposed to even mean?"

"Well, I was your first. You never kissed anyone but me. How can you know that you like me best? Aren't you worried that you are missing out, if you just settle for...like that?"

"No! Remus what the hell! I can't win with you can I?" Sirius voice was suddenly thick with tears. Remus felt a lump in his throat.

Sirius let out a desperate sigh and wiped his eyes.

"I'm going to bed," he stated blankly and walked upstairs.

Remus spent a couple minutes, sitting on one of the kichen chairs. Contemplating whether or not he should leave. He finally decided to stay.

He thought that if he just went home now he might never return.

So he walked up the spiral stairs and quietly opened the bedroom door. It was dark but Remus could hear Sirius quietly sniffle. His heart ached. He hated to make Sirius cry. Why was he even able to hurt him like that? He shouldn't be.

He carefully laid down on the bed and wrapped his arms around Sirius, spooning him. They both didn't say anything but Sirius interlaced their fingers and pressed his back a little closer against Remus chest.

**

"We finally found a house," James announced proudly during one of their weekly pub nights. James and Lily had planned to move in with each other since they had finished their Auror training but it had taken them a whole year to find something that they were both happy with. It had to be suitable for a family, since they were both excited to have kids in a few years. James had told Sirius, that if it was only up to him he would be ready for a child right now, but he didn't want to pressure Lily and also he still hadn't proposed yet. Another important plan for the near future. James had already asked him for advice on which ring to get.

"That's great," Sirius beamed. "Where are you moving to?"

"Lincolnshire," Lily replied smiling excitedly. "The house is wonderful. You guys will love it!"

She turned to Peter. "And how is it going with Christie? Do tell!"

Peter had recently aquired a new girlfriend. They had met her once, she seemed nice enough, Sirius thought. A little bland but so was Peter.

"Oh it's going great, she'll drop by later. She's still working."

"At St. Mungos right?" Remus asked.

Peter nodded. "But she is looking to transfer to St. Marmot."

"In Germany?" Lily asked surprised.

"Switzerland," Peter corrected her.

"Oh man, sorry mate that sucks," James said, but Peter shook his head.

"It's fine. I'll probably move with her."

"You will?" Now it was Sirius turn to be surprised. If he remembered correctly, Peter and Christie had only been together for 3 months and they already planned to leave the country together? A little pit of jealousy formed in his stomach.

"Yes. I'll be able to work for the paper there."

"But you don't speak German," Remus frowned.

"I do." Peter protested.

"You do?" Sirius and James asked in unison.

"Yes. My great aunt was from Austria."

"Huh." Sirius wasn't sure what to make of this new Peter lore drop. When you thought you knew someone...

Remus and Sirius decided to take the long way from the pub and walk. The fresh air was a welcome contrast to the stuffiness of the pub.

"I'm glad they found a house. James was starting to get on my nerves with all the pictures," Sirius joked, hands in the pockets of his leather jacket.

Remus smiled. "And Lincolnshire is nice."

"You think? Maybe we should look there to."

"Look for what?"

"For a house."

"If you want to move there you can look into it," Remus said. Sirius didn't miss the defensiveness in his voice.

"I thought we could pick something together. For both of us." He proposed, still hopeful, eventhough he knew the answer by now.

Remus stopped walking abruptly. "Can you drop it already! I told you, I cannot afford a house."

Sirius stopped as well, startled by Remus raised voice. He felt his chest tighten.

"So what? You will never to be able to afford anything with your part time work! Just let me cover it!"

Remus recoiled visibly at his words and Sirius wished he could take them back. That's not how he had meant to phrase it. "I'm sorry. But this way...we'll never move in together are we?" he asked, defeat swinging in his voice. Remus frowned and looked at his shoes.

"I...I guess not."

Sirius threw up his hands in frustration.

"So what's the point? If we are never gonna live together, if we are never going to share a life, why are we even together?"

"Maybe we shouldn't be."

Sirius felt numb.

"Is that what you want?" he asked quietly, tears pooling in his eyes.

Remus didn't answer.

"Fucking talk to me!" he yelled. Desperate for a response, for Remus to at least look at him.

Remus looked up, his expression blank.

"I think you are right. There's no point."

He turned and began to walk away.

Sirius stood there, frozen, unable to say anything, unable to think anything but 'Come back'.

**

Almost a week had passed since their altercation on the street before Remus found himself in front of Sirius apartment. He took a deep breath before he entered. Hoping that Sirius would be gone. Because if he wasn't...that would only complicate things further.

His prayers remained unanswered, because Sirius was sitting on the couch, bundled up in a blanket despite the warm weather. When he saw Remus he got up immediately.

"Remus..."

"I'm just here to pick up my stuff," Remus said firmly, trying to ignore the way his heart clenched. He had thought about it all week. This was the right decision. He was holding Sirius up, wasn't even making him happy. So as much as he loved him - as much as he wanted to pull him into his arms and kiss him till they both felt okay again - it would be selfish to not let him go. Sirius would hurt, surely. But it would pass. And he'd find someone else to love. Someone better. Someone who had more to offer than a parttime job at a shabby bookstore. Someone who wasn't utterly useless for one quarter of every month. Someone he didn't have to take care of.

Sirius face fell at his words and then shifted towards the same closed off expression that Remus had only ever seen before at the train station, when Sirius had walked over to his parents at the beginnig of summer break. The fact that Sirius was looking that way at him now made him feel sick.

"I'll be quick," he promised.

"Be my fucking guest," Sirius said coldly and sank back onto the couch.

Remus quickly gathered his things from the living room - mostly books - and picked up his mugs from the kitchen. All the while he could feel Sirius eyes following him.

"I'll go upstairs," he stated and walked up. He heard Sirius get up from the couch and when he turned around he saw him storming out the front door, slamming it shut behind him. Remus gathered himself and blinked the tears away that had threatened to form. He had to do this. It was the right thing. In hindsight Sirius would be glad, he was sure.

Remus picked up his toothbrush and comb from the bathroom and then finally continued to the bedroom. Remus had kept only a single drawer of clothes at Sirius place. Sirius had offered him more space but it had felt imposing to him. So he didn't have much to pack. When he threw one final look at the room, to see if he had forgotten anything, his eyes were drawn to one of his jumpers. It was lying on the bed, on Sirius side, all crumpled up. Had Sirius slept with it? Remus felt his stomach cramp and for a second he felt like he couldn't do it. He couldn't leave Sirius. He was breaking his heart.

So he can be happier later, he told himself, threw the jumper in his bag and left the apartment.

Remus decided to disapparate from the park. There were a few private spots where noone would see him. He entered the park through a small side entrance and walked, close too the shrubbery towards the back of the pond. He suddenly stopped in his tracks when he spotted a familiar figure sitting on one of the benches, sobbing desperatly.

Sirius.

It broke Remus heart to seem him like that. Maybe he preferred the closed off expression to this. For a minute or two he just stood there, helplessly watching Sirius cry, knowing he couldn't do anything to console him without jeopardising his plan. Suddenly, Sirius jumped to his feet, wiped his eyes and - without noticing Remus - ran out of the park, towards the apartment building.

Remus walked to his destination and dissappeared.

**

"Remus?" Sirius called into the apartment, out of breath from running up the stairs. "Remus!"

No answer. Sirius hurried up the stairs opening first the bathroom, then the bedroom, but Remus was gone. Deflated, he dropped down onto the bed, absentmindedly reaching for the jumper that had provided him with at least a little comfort over the last days. It still smelled of Remus a little. But his hand couldn't find it so he looked up and realized that it was gone.

Of course it was. Remus was gone. He wouldn't come back. Sirius buried his face in his pillow to muffle the loud sobs and screams that escaped him uncontrollably. He felt like a stupid kid, brawling like that but he just couldn't stop. It hurt so badly. Sirius felt as if his entire chest was torn open and someone had ripped out his heart. Maybe someone had.

[chaotic-on-main]

Chapter 4: February

☾ Pairings ➼ Levi Ackerman x fem!mute!Reader (she/her pronouns), set in a modern semi-fictional world

☾ Summary ➼ Due to childhood trauma, you find yourself an adult without the ability to speak. After years of working on it, you have found ways to live without a voice. Now here in your late 20s, you are 5 months in getting used to a new town. On a fateful day in late November, you and your adopted sister visit a local bookstore-café, unaware of the friendships about to blossom. Throughout the months, one friendship in particular develops into something more.

☾ Content/Warnings ➼ fluff, slowburn, oblivious feelings, angst, mention of minor character deaths, trauma, illness, adoption, mentions of fire, disabilities, alcohol use, very light nsfw mentions, references to child abuse (to be continued as writing is ongoing)

☾ Author's note ➼ Hey guys! Happy (early) Valentine's Day! This would have been out much earlier but I figured since it's February, I would actually release it near the holiday the chapter is actually about. I'm so excited to finally release this into the wild! I'm in the process of working on March but I might take a break to work on some fluffy drabbles/one-shots because tis the season! I'll be back soon with more. As always, if you missed the last chapter, you can find it here!

☾ Word Count ➼ ~8.5k (this one is even longer and I'm not even sorry about it)

Your bedroom floor is littered with piles of the clothes you spent the last hour trying on then discarding out of dissatisfaction. You and Hange were expecting company soon and you were standing in just your undergarments while staring into your almost empty closet in disdain. It felt as if you were 17 again, freaking out the morning before a school day because you were not comfortable with any of the fabrics in your wardrobe. You throw your hands up in the air and exhale loudly, thinking to yourself of how hopeless this endeavor was.

With people coming over, you wanted to try and dress up a bit. But in frustration, you opt for your usual wear of jeans and a baggy pullover sweater. Pulling your hair up in two little buns, you just grunt in acceptance. At least you were comfortable, which is the most important factor here. After slipping on a mismatched pair of socks, you pad back into the living room where Hange sat on the floor milling around on her work laptop.

‘Working again?’ You sign at them while passing them to the kitchen. You open a cupboard for a can of black tea. You were told Levi was coming over for the get together and you wanted to make sure there was tea ready. For everyone, of course, not just Levi. Or so you keep telling yourself.

“Just finishing up a couple documents is all. Did you make sure that we had the ingredients for the cookies today?” They mumble from behind the screen, their fingers zooming over the keyboard as they speak. Their eyes flick up at you as you sign a quick yes and they nod in response, shoving their face back into their reports.

You make quick work of the electric tea kettle, pushing the button to get the water boiling before tossing in a couple teaspoons of loose leaves in your favorite teapot. It was a gift from your foster-parents many years ago and it had golden bunnies hopping around on a light teal background. After the kettle shuts itself off, you pour the water into the teapot to steep then place the lid on top gently.

You then set forth to make sure your wipe-off board had fully stocked markers for tonight, placing them on the kitchen bar for you to reach easily. Texting might be faster, but a wipe-off board served better with a crowd of people so everyone could see what you were saying. When you’re satisfied with everything, you then turn to Hange.

It was past two in the afternoon, and they were still in their pajamas with a rat’s nest in place of their hair. Company was due soon and she was still tapping away, so you go up behind them and place your hands on their shoulders gently. She hums in response, not turning to you. You lean forward and place a hand on the laptop, and she stops. They cock their head up to look at you and their glasses glint off the afternoon sun coming through the dining room window. You furrow your brows at them and scrunch your nose.

“Can I help you?” She asks. Nodding, you release your hands to sign to her.

‘You need a shower.’ She purses her lips and averts her gaze.

“I have time, let me just finish this report first.”

‘No, shower first and then come back to this.’

“But-” You cut them off by pinching her cheek, not hard enough to bruise but enough to leave a mark.

‘Don’t make me throw you in the bath, you know I’ll do it.’ You smirk while raising an eyebrow at them. You’re met with an eyeroll, but she saves her work before shutting her laptop anyways. You kiss her forehead from above and then move back so they can stand up.

‘Thanks, don’t forget to wash your ass.’ You laugh silently and she just gives you a disgusted look before heading into her room, laptop under her arm. She flips you a bird before disappearing behind her door. You grin at yourself and then head back to the kitchen to set out some butter to soften.

For Valentine’s Day this year, Hange decided to throw a little party at your shared apartment. You just wanted to bake and watch stupid movies together, but they talked you into socializing. She had said something about today not being just for couples. She wanted to “celebrate singleness”, her words not yours. So of course, you were roped in because honestly, where else would you have to be? But that also meant she had invited quite a few people as well; a few coworkers and Erwin. And with Erwin, the invitation had spread to Miche and Levi. The latter of which you were excited for, no matter how much you told yourself it wasn’t such a big deal.

You smile at how close you and Levi had gotten in the past couple weeks, getting to know each other a little more as the days passed. It mainly consisted of texting each other little things you thought you’d both like or little hangouts at the café after hours. The café meetings were not anything new, of course, but they had a vastly different atmosphere than before. You chalk it up to the friendlier nature and usage of more words around each other.

You preoccupy yourself by pulling out the rest of the necessary ingredients and dishes needed for your baking adventure. One of the compromises Hange had made with you was the allowance of being able to still make your checkerboard cookies regardless of the plans. It was something you had picked up in the last couple years and it quickly became one of your favorite traditions. Hange did not refuse, which you think is mainly because she loved your baked goods and was looking forward to shoving them in her mouth. With that thought, you pull out another stick of butter to make a double batch just in case.

After a while, you place your hands on your hips and nod your head in satisfaction. Your ears pick up the sound of squeaking floorboards coming from Hange’s bedroom which signaled that she had finished bathing. Another noise comes from the front door with someone rapping on the hardwood. When you glance at the clock on the stove, it reads 2:47. Someone was a little early, you think to yourself as you saunter up to the door.

Pulling it open, you’re met with a smiling Erwin holding a small bundle of flowers and a bottle of wine. Miche flanks him with a box of canned beer under one arm, his other out to give you a hug which you run into instantly, making sure to do the same with Erwin. In the last month since their dinner party, it wasn’t just Levi you had gotten close to. While you were already pretty comfortable with Erwin through your sister, Miche was a confidant you hadn’t expected to have. Throughout the passing days, you found that he was as technologically competent as he was as good of a chef. When he wasn’t behind a computer screen, he was often found sending you obscure recipes through late night text messages that he wanted to try with you.

‘I’m so glad you two could make it!’ You sign to them ecstatically, breaking out into a grin.

“Wouldn’t miss it for the world.” Erwin chirps as he winks down at you.

Taking a step back, you lead them through the door with your hand. You peep a quick glance behind them to make sure there was no one else coming. To your disappointment, there wasn’t. You shut the door behind the two men with a sigh. Hange must have talked to them beforehand about the apartment rules because they were quick to pull their shoes off at the door before walking more into the apartment.

You follow them into the living room as you check your phone. No new messages. You had sent Levi a text earlier this morning to see if he was planning to make it, but he had not responded. So, when Erwin places the flowers and wine down on the kitchen counter, you step up next to him to get his attention.

‘Thank you so much for bringing these.’ You hesitate for a moment as he looks down at you patiently. ‘Is Levi still coming?’ You stare up into his bright eyes, his lips twitching in amusement at your question.

“Yes, he is just running a little behind. He had a stop to make before making his way here.” He pats your head and you just blush. But you feel immensely better, knowing that Levi was coming for certain. To not waste the tea you’ve made, of course, you remind yourself. You grab the bouquet of flowers and take a big whiff of them, relishing the sweet scent. Bending down into a counter beneath you, you grab a vase and get to work trimming the stems so you can place it on the dinner table. Miche is quick to place a couple of his beers in the fridge along with the wine Erwin brought so they would be cold for later.

‘What kind of beer did you bring?’ You sign towards Miche, Erwin translating for you.

“Oh, definitely not something you would like, even if you did drink. I saw it at the store and had to try it though. There’s peanut butter in it apparently.” Miche tilts his head towards the fridge. You make a grimace at him, and he chuckles.

“Hange had said to BYOB but I can’t imagine just having beer would be great, so I elected for something sweeter.” Erwin furrows his eyebrows at the very idea.

‘You do know BYOB doesn’t just mean beer, right? It’s just a figure of speech.’

“Wait, really?”

Just then, Hange comes out sporting a towel wrapped on their head as well as a t-shirt and jeans. They chose to go for the comfortable yet casual look too. She grins widely at the new company and runs to give them both a big hug as well.

“You guys made it!” She shrieks.

“We told you we would.” Erwin’s deep timbre responds back nonchalantly.

“Yeah yeah, but I still worried I ran you off with how much I talked about it. We’re going to have so much fun today!” Hange starts chattering away about the plans she had made for everyone. You giggle to yourself as you listen to them talk excitedly.

Since you weren’t one for alcohol, you always ended up as the mom for everyone, doubly so for your sister. She may be 5 years older than you, but you always felt like more of the responsible one. You didn’t mind it though. You figured it was a good payoff for everything else she does for you on a daily basis. Suddenly, another knock from the front door echoes down the hall and you’re quick to throw the metal bowl you just grabbed from the shelf down onto the counter before running to see who it is.

Much to your dismay, it’s not Levi. When you pull open the door, you see three people; Moblit Berner being one of them, whom you have seen many times since your move here. Hange’s coworkers are all carrying their own vice for tonight in their arms. You give them a small smile in welcome and Moblit offers a friendly one in return. The two companions behind him consist of Nanaba, someone you have only met twice in passing, and another man, someone you have never seen before. You eyeball him apprehensively as you wave to Nanaba in hello, to which she does the same in response.

“Oh yeah, Onyankopon,” Moblit turns his head over his shoulder to refer to the man. “This is Hange’s little sister.” He says kindly. You wave at the stranger, still wary. The man named Onyankopon is very tall and broad chested with a crew cut that faded up his head. He gives you a big smile that warms up his entire face and speaks to you in a velvety tone.

“It’s nice to officially meet you. You know, your sister talks a lot about you.” His chocolate eyes are even warmer than his demeanor, and you can’t help but grin back at him with a blush, deciding he was okay. You side-step so they can funnel into the door. Your eyes linger down the hallway without meaning to, hoping to see a raven-haired man stalking up to the door. But it remained empty, so you shut it with another sigh and turn back to the ever-growing crowded apartment.

The company sat in various places in the living room while idle chatter filled the space. Some even opted for the floor, Hange being one of them. After a while, you had to remind your sister to take off the towel she had wrapped around her head because she was so engrossed in her conversation that she didn’t even notice it. It had dried for so long that her hair was even more frazzled than before. You just shook your head at her in amusement.

You make yourself busy with the cookies while everyone converses, the noise turning into buzzing. The living room was so cramped with bodies that you could barely breathe, so you found great solace in the kitchen. At this point you had donned on an apron that had floral designs vining their way to the top. It was an attempt to keep the inevitable mess from splattering on to you. While you loved to cook and bake, you were not neat about it in any capacity, but you found that to be the fun of it.

After turning the mixing bowl on to blend the sugar and butter, you turn to your now cold teapot and sigh. It had gone cold, but you hate to waste it; you decide to pour it into a sealable cup to make iced tea with it later. You start to juggle the choices of either starting a new pot now or waiting until everyone has arrived when your ears perk up at another knock at the door. Your heart now racing at who it could be, you stare out to the living room over the half wall to see if anyone heard but no one had even turned their head. You shut off the mixer then wipe your hands on your apron as you make your way to the door. Taking a deep breath, you pull it open effortlessly.

You can’t keep your face from breaking out into a grin when your eyes fall on the short man with a deadpan expression standing in front of you. Levi. Furlan is there as well, waving at you from behind his friend. You mouth a ‘Hi’ to them both, barely containing the giddiness from the present company.

“Sorry we’re late. Not only did this jerk decide he was tagging along, but he also spent an ungodly amount of time getting ready.” Levi’s gruff voice speaks out to you as he tips his head to Furlan. You meet his soft gaze, and he winks playfully. Levi was wearing a snug, black long sleeve with even darker denim jeans. Your stomach flips as you force yourself to stare into Levi’s metallic eyes.

Waving them in the door, they follow suit and take their shoes off to place next to the pile already sitting by the door. Levi scoffs, no doubt annoyed by the messiness. You’re suddenly hyper aware of how dirty the apartment must look compared to his. After shutting the door behind them, you spin around and almost run right into Levi. You gasp in surprise and step back right into the door with a ‘thud’. Furlan was long gone, and you can hear his playful voice reverberating down the hall as he introduced himself to the rest of the company.

“Are you okay?” Levi asks, concern lacing into his deep voice. You laugh at yourself silently as he eyes you carefully. You nod and wave your hands dismissively at him to show you were indeed okay.

“Mm. I bought these for tonight. Where can I put them?” He shifts three large bottles of various sodas in his arms in awkwardness. His eyes avert from you as he speaks. You stare stunned for a moment as you realize he must have bought them specifically for you. Noticing you haven’t moved, his eyes shift back up to you with an eyebrow raised. Cracking a smile, you nod. The flips in your stomach hardly cease as you tip your head forward to signify where the kitchen was, passing him as well to lead the way.

After he places the bottles in the fridge, he closes the doors, and his eyes widen in surprise at the mess before him. You being you, there was flour everywhere and butter wrappers lie discarded by the mixer. Said mixer was surrounded by sugar from when you missed the bowl earlier. You look away sheepishly as you feel a hard stare at your face.

“Are you a toddler?” He asks, but there is no malice. It almost sounded as if he was amused.

Grabbing one of the wipe-off boards you placed in the kitchen earlier, you pop off a cap and start scrawling. 'Maybe.' Flipping it over to him with a shrug, you see the corners of his mouth twitch.

'Tea?' You point to your cluttered tea station. Levi turns to see an open tin of tea leaves and an empty kettle. He says nothing as he gets to work, doing it all before you can do anything. You gawk at his deft hands as he makes quick work of it all, like he was back in his cafe. Some of his hair fell in his face as his head hung low in focus. After gently placing the porcelain lid back on the pot, he turns back to you.

'You didn't have to do that, you know. I was mainly asking so I could start it.'

"Tch, I was already here. Besides, I'm probably faster at it." You can't argue on that, so you just shrug your shoulders at him again with a slight smile. He leans back against the kitchen counter and studies your face, and you feel your face bloom in heat. You place the board back down on the counter and point to your mess to show you were going to start back on the cookies. Tightening your hair buns, you then wash your hands and get back to work on the mixer, throwing in the ingredients as needed.

After a moment, you hear something rustling behind you and when you glance to the source, you see Levi pulling on the other apron that hung off the fridge. You stare at him curiously and he just tightens the drawstrings behind him as he meets your gaze.

"I'm helping." You hesitate but scoot over in response, and he steps up next to you. Your arms are almost touching, and it takes everything inside of you not to combust. So, you both get to work like that, side by side. The sounds of chatter and laughter from the rest of the group fade out as you both concentrate. You hand him the rest of the ingredients and he carefully pours them in the bowl. When everything is incorporated and set aside, you then measure out the other ingredients for the chocolate portion of the cookies. You don’t see it, but Levi just watches you patiently, admiring your meticulous yet messy way of making sure everything is accurate. When you glance up at him, he looks away quickly.

"Whatcha two up to?" A sly voice rings out after a while. Startled, you both jerk your heads up from the tray you two were placing raw dough cutouts on. It's Hange, leaning on the wall with their chin cradled in two cupped hands. They have a very cheeky grin plastering their face.

"What does it look like, Four-Eyes?" Levi snaps back dryly.

"Well, since you're asking me. It looks like you two are having fun." They wiggle their eyebrows at you and Levi just scoffs and averts his gaze. Your cheeks flare up again because you were definitely having fun, but you weren’t going to admit that. Hange tuts at you two and reaches over to pat you on the head lovingly.

"I just came over because you were both ignoring our calls." Looking over their shoulder, you see Erwin eyeballing you and Levi with a raised eyebrow. He takes a sip of his drink and looks away to keep talking to Moblit and Onyankopon. Nanaba, Furlan, and Miche broke out a deck of cards and are in the middle of a game of Poker.

'Sorry, I wasn’t paying attention.' You sign to her, frowning.

"No worries, we were just wondering if you guys were hungry. We were thinking of pizza!" They clap their hands excitedly. They were always thinking of pizza, you laugh to yourself. Hange loves pizza so much that even the mere mention of its cheesy goodness would summon them right then and there. Your stomach rumbles just thinking about it as well, so you nod.

"I could eat." Levi states as he lifts his teacup to his lips, three fingertips on the rim. Him doing so reminds you of the cup Levi had poured for you that you had left to get cold. You lightly touch the sides of it, and it still feels warm. As you take a sip, you’re hit with the boldness of the leaf blend you had chosen as well as a perfect amount of sweetness. ‘Levi makes the best tea’, you think to yourself.

"Perfect, I'll get those ordered. We'll just stick to the basics, yeah?" She pulls out her phone and starts dialing the nearest pizza place while walking away to join everyone in the living room. Levi picks up the couple of trays filled with raw cookies and slides them into the pre-heated oven. When he turns around, you can't help but silently chuckle as you take a closer look at his face for the first time since you both started your venture.

There is a streak of cocoa powder on his forehead that starkly contrasts on his pale skin. You point to it and your shoulders bounce in silent laughter as he brings a hand up to it to rub the spot. His eyes go wide as he notices the brown powder that is now staining his fingers. He grabs the towel you had draped over the dishwasher to wipe it away, his ears turning pink. He turns away from you as he does.

You eye Levi as he folds the towel neatly and puts it back where he got it from, huffing under his breath. He then starts gathering the dirty dishes and piles them into the sink, tugging on the faucet to rinse them off. While he's busy on that, you begin wiping down the counters with a wet rag. Levi gives you a side-eye and you meet his gaze, giving him a warm smile. He looks away again to focus on a bowl he was currently spraying with hot water. As you stare at him for a second longer, you can’t help but think how well you two worked together.

You grab the board once more and write, ‘Thank you for your help. (:’ before flipping the board over to Levi as he dries his hands on the towel. His eyes trail the words, and he glances up at you with indifference.

“Mm.” He hums. His eyes flick over to the timer that was set on the stove as he leans back against the sink and takes another sip of his tea. The cookies had eight minutes left. It almost felt as if he was reading your mind because neither of you moved with the intention leaving the calm kitchen. When you look over to the living space, you see everyone talking over each other in lively conversation. Onyankopon is pointing at the small fish tank that sat nestled in the corner of the room as he shouts over to Hange, who is in the middle of cleaning off the coffee table.

“Hange, I didn’t know you had fish.” He bends down to take a closer look at the two little fish darting around shifting plants.

“Oh yes, they’re my little babies!” She stands straight up and jumps over to the tank and continues as she points at the respective tetras. “This one is Sonny and this one is Bean!” You can’t help but chuckle internally at your over enthusiastic sister. Ever since you both moved to Jinae, Hange really wanted pets. They had requested a dog, but they were too overwhelming for you. She wasn’t really around enough to be able to spend time with them anyways which meant most of it would fall on to you and you weren’t okay with that. So, you both compromised on her getting a couple fish to start out with and would think about the notion again later. Thus far, Hange has been very content with them and hasn’t asked for anything else.  

“They’re gorgeous, Hange.” Onyankopon compliments as he stares at the tank. Hange slaps him on the shoulder in appreciation and starts rambling off the reasons why she chose tetras and all the research she did on them.

“That’s it, boys. I win!” Nanaba shouts from the dining table, slamming her cards onto the hard surface. Furlan and Miche groan in frustration, the latter rubbing his face in exhaustion.

“I swear you’re cheating.” Furlan sits back in his chair as he places his own hand down.

“I second that.” Miche leans over to stare at her cards and just sighs. Dejected, he gets up and wanders towards the bathroom, almost running into Erwin as he emerges from that same direction.

“C’mon guys, at least I vetoed any betting.” She calls out, smirking as she piles the cards up and starts shuffling them.

“You just did that out of pity.” Nanaba just cackles maniacally at Furlan’s dispirited comment.

“Hange, there are too many men in here.” She twists in her chair to face your sister who turns to acknowledge Nanaba’s complaint.

“Psh, I’ll drink to that.” And she does, holding her drink up in cheers and takes a big gulp. You roll your eyes, but you agree. There were way too many men in your apartment right now. Just then, there’s a knock at the door and Hange stands up quickly, face alert like a meerkat in the African wilderness.

“Pizza!” They yell and then they’re off to the front door, a wad of cash in hand.

At the same time, the timer goes off with a soft beeping and you’re quick to grab the oven mitts to pull the trays out. You gingerly place the trays on the stovetop to let them cool and Levi reaches past you to turn off the oven, his face in your periphery as you glance to the side. His movements waft his scent straight into your nose and you find yourself breathing it in deeply. He smelled of clean laundry with a hint of body wash. It isn’t overpowering in the slightest and you revel in it.

“You two are missing out on the fun cooping up in here.” Someone speaks out behind you two as they walk through the archway to the kitchen. You both jump at the voice and turn to see Erwin holding an armful of empty alcohol containers.

“Tch, it beats being surrounded by a bunch of loud mouths.” Levi counters, turning back to the cookies to inspect them. You reach over to grab the trash can and hold it up to Erwin for him to dump the trash. Hange comes in behind him and places four stacked pizza boxes on the counter next to you. You stare at your sister in awe and sign, ‘That’s a lot of pizza.’

“I know but I didn’t know how hungry everyone was. Besides! Leftovers.” They give another cheeky grin, and you just playfully punch her arm. Reaching up in the cupboard behind you, you grab a handful of plates for everyone as well a cup for you, now realizing how parched your throat was.

“Oi, grab me one too.” Levi asks next to you, so you grab another after setting what you held down first. When you turn to hand it to him, he’s a lot closer than you expected and accidentally hit him in the side of the head with the glass in hand. He doesn’t even flinch. He’s looking up at you with knit eyebrows and a thin line in place of his lips.

“Ow.” You hear Erwin and Hange stifling laughter as they organize the pizza boxes.

You set the cup down and start signing frantically, ‘I’m sorry.’ over and over again. You place both of your hands on his face and tilt it so you could get a better look at the spot where you hit him, filled with relief when you find no visible damage. You’re in such a panic that you don’t even notice his stunned disposition. Your hands feel so warm against his cool skin, and it’s so soft. You realize what you’re doing after a moment and let your arms drop to your side, mouthing an apology and stepping away from him.

“It’s fine. I didn’t realize how long your arms were.” He mumbles as he walks over to the fridge without another word, cup in one hand, his other pressing against the spot where you smacked him. How long your arms were? That was such a weird thing to say. Flustered, you grab the plates and shuffle them over to the counter with the pizza. Now that they have opened the boxes, you get a closer look at the options.

There were a couple cheeses, one pepperoni, and one pineapple. Your eyes light up and you gaze at Hange with adoration, forgetting what just happened mere moments ago. They wink at you then call for everyone to plate up ‘while it’s hot’.

Yes, you ate pineapple on your pizza. It first began as a joke just to spite those who turned it down, but then you found out you actually enjoyed the taste. There was something about the sweet and savory flavors that blended perfectly.

Levi comes over with two glasses and hands one with what looked to be a dark cola to you. You mouth a ‘thank you’ as you watch his face twist in disgust as he eyes the boxes in front of him. “Are those pineapples?” Levi leans in for a better look, eyebrows knit.

“Pineapples?!” Furlan rushes over from the table to look at the pizza, the new poker game forgotten. “Alright, who’s the one who asked for them?” He looks around the room and spots you with your hand raised in the air.

“Oh my gosh I could hug you right now. Pineapple on pizza is the best!” He exclaims. He leans over the half wall to marvel at it and then looks back up to you with a massive smile. Levi clicks his tongue and grabs a slice out of the cheese box then makes his way into the living room. You can’t help but feel sad at the sudden absence.

.

“Okay, okay. My turn. Hange. Your obsession with zombies, what the fuck is up with that?” Nanaba leans on the coffee table in anticipation. Your sister just cackles and sits up straight as they push their glasses up their nose with a finger. There’s a glimmer in their eyes.

“That’s hardly a difficult question. I grew up watching zombie movies and I just need to know how they tick. Like what kind of sorcery goes into making them do the things they do?!”

“Hange, they’re fictional creatures, there’s no science that could ever explain that!” Moblit shouts from next to her, exhausted. Hange just laughs and goes on a tangent about possible ways to make and cure zombies, but you zone out as it’s a conversation you have had with them for many years. Looking around the table, you smile to yourself. Tonight has been such a fulfilling evening for you. Being around familiar faces as well as getting to know new ones brought more joy to you than you expected. Not to mention this ridiculous game you were all playing that made your face ache from laughter.

Miche had come up with a game called “What the fuck is up with that?” as a way to wind down from such a big dinner. Players ask someone something personal about their life and follow it with ‘what the fuck is up with that?’ and if they refuse to answer it, they have to take a drink. It honestly felt like a more cracked version of “Truth or Dare” but it was fun, nonetheless. You, of course, nursed soda in your hands instead of alcohol so you were the most sober one here.

So far, no one was really trashed. Tipsy, definitely; There were some words that were starting to slur. What surprised you the most was Levi’s soberness in comparison to everyone else considering how many times he had to take a drink. It figures that any questions directed to him, he opted for silence. You do, however, notice his cheeks were ever so slightly flushed when you glance at him next to you. He radiated an aura of relaxation, which you can’t help but assume is a rare thing for him. He turns to meet your gaze, not looking away after what felt like a good minute.

“Okay okay, we get it Hange. Enough!” Your attention is snapped back into the present company, and you break eye contact to see Onyankopon laughing and throwing a balled-up napkin at Hange’s face to shut her up.

“Fine, sorry! Hmm…” Their eyes wander on the people sitting in the circle with them until they land on Furlan’s face. “Alright, Furlan. You! You’re single and you’re extremely attractive. What the fuck is up with that?” Everyone’s attention shifts to Furlan’s bright red face.

“What the fuck is up with the singleness or the attractiveness?” His voice sounds an octave higher.

“Well, both, obviously, dumbass.” Nanaba pitches in.

“I well. Uh.” His eyes flicker to yours and then look away just as quickly. “I just haven’t found what I was looking for yet, I guess. And for the attractiveness, I just am?” He shrugs his shoulders and laughs nervously. He takes a sip of his drink anyways as he averts his gaze to anything but the people in front of him.

“Hmmm. I don’t know if I’m okay with that answer, but I’ll let it slide. Okay, you pick the next one!”

“Oh okay, uhh.” His eyes travel around until they lock eyes with you again. “The berry nickname. What the fuck is up with that?” Everyone’s gaze now shifts on you. You realize that Hange had called you her ‘little berry’ in front of everyone but had never really given an explanation. You bite your bottom lip and start scrawling on your board. Everyone waits for you patiently and a wave of gratitude washes over you. They really were a great group of friends.

‘When I was younger, I used to steal Hange’s berries from their parfaits.’ You flip the board, and everyone is silent as they read. They burst into laughter one by one, Hange included. Even Levi’s scarred mouth has an upturn. You couldn’t give the full story because it would be too long for you to write, but growing up in the foster system meant you were deprived of a lot of good things, one of those being fresh fruit. So, when the night came when the Zoe’s officially adopted you and they wanted to celebrate with parfaits, you went absolutely feral. You had never tasted anything like fresh berries before and they quickly became your favorite thing in the world, next to your sister of course.

“You guys should have seen her for the month after that. All she wanted was berries for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. She prefers strawberries, but we don’t discriminate here. All berries are valid!” She yells, taking another sip of her drink. You laugh silently along with them and start thinking of the next victim. After a few moments, you scribble down what was on your mind. Then you point to Erwin and his eyes bulge at the sudden movement but straightens up anyways, clearing his throat.

‘So Erwin, I notice you’ve been taking my sister out for drinks quite often. Your relationship with them, what the fuck is up with that?” You smile innocently at your sister’s composed face.

“Psh, easy.” He pats your sister on the head and Hange just laughs in response, swatting at it. “You of all people know how fun she is to be around. More so when she’s drunk. She’s a great karaoke partner.” They clink the bottles they had in their hands together and smile at each other. You furrow your eyebrows and stick your tongue out.

‘Boooooooo.’ You write and your sister just shoves your shoulder.

“C’mon, you can’t seriously think there’s anything happening between this,” Hange wiggles their index finger in between her and Erwin. “Like really. We’re definitely not each other’s type.”

Miche snorts and mutters something under his breath but you can’t hear the words. Erwin chuckles and nods in agreement then takes another sip of his drink as he surveys the faces in front of him. They land on Levi and his gray eyes bore into Erwin’s crystal blue.

“Hey Levi…” Erwin has a smirk playing on his lips as he stares at his best friend. “I notice you’ve been smiling when you look down at your phone recently. What the fuck is up with that?” Erwin’s eyes sparkle mischievously. Levi just scoffs but you gawk at him with wide eyes, along with Furlan and Hange. Levi doesn’t smile. Sure, you can always tell when he’s fighting it. But you’ve never seen his curt demeanor break into joy.

Levi narrows his eyes on Erwin then answers with a big swig of his glass, finishing off the contents in it as he continues to stare at his friend. Levi’s face is certainly more flushed than before, the tips of his ears bright red as well. He looks away, refusing to meet anyone’s eyes.

“Booooooo!” Hange echoes what you had exclaimed earlier.

“Leeeeeviiii! Are you talking with someone?! I thought you were mine.” Furlan pouts, arms crossed.

“It’s none of your goddamn business.” Levi’s voice is brusque. He gets up from his spot quickly and takes his empty glass to the kitchen.

“What do you mean? I think your friends deserve to know.” Hange sits up on their knees to call over to Levi’s backside.

“Then we’re not friends.” He says and disappears down the hall to the bathroom.

“Is he always like that?” Nanaba questions as she finishes her own drink as she stares down the hallway.

“Yes, it’s very normal for him.” Erwin states matter-of-factly, chuckling at the rise he got from Levi.

“Short and angry. It’s quite the combo.” Onyankopon cuts in, grinning.

You fidget with the wipe-off marker as you think about how he reacted. It wasn’t very surprising to you. Levi is a very private man when it comes to such things. All of the conversations you had with him were still on a fundamental surface layer. You knew better than to ask anything deeper for fear of him shutting you out, like he just did with Erwin’s question. Levi, at least, didn’t sound angry right now, but you suspect it was because it was someone so close to him asking such a question. If it was you… then. Well, you were scared of what he might do from such an intimate question.

“Yanno what, it’s probably about that time I head out. It’s getting pretty late.” Moblit chimes in as he starts to get up from his spot on the floor.

“Whaaat!? We still have one more thing left to do. Besides, it’s literally,” Hange takes a glance at the clock on the wall. “10:30. Just a little longer??” They clasp their hands as they beg, staring up at her friend.

“I must agree with Moblit here, we need to submit our report before the end of this week.” Onyankopon replies as he gets up as well. He squeezes Hange’s shoulder as he speaks with a slight smile. Hange sticks her bottom lip out.

“Fine, fine. But just know, you’re missing out on only the greatest tradition ever: Making fun of stupid romance movies.”

“I wanna do that!” Nanaba cuts in, laughing at the idea.

“Nanaba, we’re literally your ride home.” Moblit calls out from the dining room as he pulls on his winter jacket. Grabbing Nanaba’s as well, he makes sure to pick up the deck of cards they brought and shoves it into her jacket pocket.

“Boo.” She gets up clumsily and huffs. “You two are no fun.”

“What she said.” Hange says, sticking her tongue out again.

“Seriously though, Hange. Great party. We had a really good time.” Onyankopon compliments as he zips up his own coat. At this point, everyone is standing up as they talk to each other. You glance over and notice that Miche is getting ready to leave too.

‘You’re going too?’ You scrawl to him quickly.

“Ah yes, unfortunately IT never takes a break.” He mutters to you solemnly as you go in to give him a tight hug. “Are we still on for next Wednesday?” You nod at him with a cheerful grin. “Great, I’ll see you then.” He ruffles your hair and walks past to say goodbye to everyone else.

After a few more goodbyes, it’s just you, Hange, Erwin, and Furlan standing in the living room. Your sister and Erwin were conversing about what movie to watch as Furlan shuffles up next to you. Levi still hadn’t come out of the bathroom yet.

“I bet he’s taking a shit.” His blasé statement makes you giggle uncontrollably, your shoulders shaking as you do. You hold your hand to your mouth to compose yourself as you give Furlan such a bewildered look. He just winks at you.

“Furlan, I’m going to kick your ass.” Levi’s sharp voice cuts in behind you both and it makes you both jump.

“Hey now, I was just kidding.” Furlan’s voice wavers as he takes a step back. You wave at Levi with a warm smile, but he just averts his gaze and goes to sit down on the sofa, one leg crossed on his knee. Biting your cheek, you go and find a spot on the floor, making sure to put a pillow under your butt for comfort. Hange and Erwin are flicking through a bunch of streaming apps trying to find the chosen movie for tonight.

“Ah okay, I know what we’re doing!” Hange slaps their hands together in finality. Erwin makes his way to the armchair and sits back with a heavy sigh.

“Not my first choice.” He says, pinching the bridge of his nose with two fingers.

“Oh c’mon. Everything about it screams bad romance. Plus, it’s the worst out of all of them.”

“Hange, you never cease to amaze me.” Furlan states as he takes the spot next to Levi.

Twilight: New Moon? Really? In your heart of hearts, you couldn’t completely hate Twilight as you were practically obsessed with it in your late teens. But you had to agree, it wasn’t the best out of the five films. It’s like Hange knew what you were thinking because they stare directly into your eyes and wiggle their eyebrows at you teasingly. You roll your eyes, and she chuckles.

“Move it, sis. I’m going for the spot behind you.” Hange slips past you to sit on the couch right next to Levi’s other side. You back up so you’re sandwiched in between Hange’s legs, and you yawn with the added warmth. You had a fleeting thought of not being able to finish the movie before falling asleep. How right you were. You don’t even make it past Bella’s dream sequence, drifting off into your own little world. The smell of clean laundry and musky body wash permeates your senses as you do.

.

Levi isn’t even paying attention to the movie. Even if it was something he was interested in, his focus could not be kept on the screen. Levi felt like his heart was about to burst out of his chest as he felt the weight of you leaning against his bad leg. Your soft cheek pressed into his knee while you slept soundly. His joints have been aching for the last hour, but he would sooner touch fire before disturbing you. He couldn’t see your face very well from this angle, but he could only assume how peaceful you looked right now. Your hair is still in buns, but they were much messier than before from the activities of the day, hair falling every which way.

As you sighed softly in your sleep, his mind raced with everything that had happened today. From the ecstatic look in your eyes when you opened the front door to when you had gently cradled his head in your warm hands after hitting him on accident, making sure you didn’t hurt him. He still felt tingles of your touch shooting through his nervous system from that. And making cookies with you, he had more fun than he could admit. You were so meticulous and careful, albeit chaotic in your ways. He found it so endearing.

 Then that damn Erwin asking that stupid question. Erwin knew and still egged him on. Of course, it was you; you were the reason why his heart and stomach did flips whenever he heard his phone vibrate. He wouldn’t allow anyone to know that though, especially you. Not when you already seem so entwined in other people’s lives.

Levi hadn’t missed Furlan’s interest in you. His longtime friend often stated that he wanted to get to know you even more. Not to mention Furlan’s tactless ways of wanting to include you in everything he made plans to do. It seemed as if you weren’t aware of his intentions though, so maybe he wasn’t clear enough. Levi hopes you never pick up on it.

And of course, there was Miche. What kind of relationship did you have with him? Levi didn’t mishear how you had plans with him next week. And the intimate touching? What was that all about? The relationship with Miche did not seem romantic from his viewpoint, but then again.

Levi was never the jealous type, or so he thought. He found that any attention aimed at you ruffled him. What about you made him feel like this? He scoffs under his breath, not able to look away from the back of your head. Hange stops munching on the cookie in her hands and turns at the sound, now noticing you fast asleep on Levi’s knee.

“Want me to take her for you?” They whisper to Levi, shifting to stand up.

“No, it’s fine. I don’t want you to miss out on prime Eduardo and Beatrice or whoever the fuck these people are.” Levi waves his hand dismissively and carefully gets up, making sure to move your head so it doesn’t flop forward. “Which one is her room?” He asks as he stares down at Hange. They regard him in curiosity but smile regardless.

“The door with the sakuras on them.” Levi nods and bends down to effortlessly pick you up despite his smaller frame, cradling you as your head falls back. You’re deeply asleep at this point, he assumes, because you make no motion from the disturbance. Levi feels the stares from Furlan and Erwin as he steps over everyone to make it to the set of bedroom doors down the hall.

As he delicately places you on your bed, he starts to pull the soft comforter up to cover you but then you shift in your sleep, making him pause. With the confirmation of your sleep-induced heavy breathing, he pulls the blanket up the rest of the way and takes a long look at your soft features. The peace that radiated off your face was something he delighted in. How beautiful you were to him.

On his way out, he steps slowly to the door, being mindful of his surroundings as he goes. He spots a couple of framed pictures that littered your cluttered desk. One catches his eye in particular; It’s a photo of when you were very young, maybe 5 or so. He takes a step forward for a closer look, minding the creaking floorboards carefully. An unsettling feeling runs cold in his veins as he recognizes the family that surrounded you as well as the house in the background. He knew that family and he knew that house, and he came to realize he knew you as well.

A flashback hits him like a brick. One of him and the boy in the photo, your brother, playing outside until the sunset. Of you yelling for him with your small voice that it was time for dinner and that he needed to come home. Of your little pigtails completely askew as you cried after falling on the gravel due to a skateboard accident from when him and your brother tried to teach you how to balance on it. Of him giving you a flower to distract you from the pain and your bleeding kneecaps. Of having to move away because his good for nothing father threatened his mom and Levi had warned him to try. Of you and your family waving goodbye as he stared from the rear window, the view of your tear-streaked face getting smaller and smaller as his mom drove away.

He had forgotten all about you, and it seemed you had forgotten about him. A breath hitches in his throat and he turns to look back at you, your face scrunched up from a dream as you pull the blankets closer. No wonder he felt compelled to you, almost like he needed to protect you. With a soft sigh, he creeps slowly to the door and slips out before shutting it close behind him.

You roll over in your sleep, sighing again, the night of the fire haunting your dreams.

☆AN ➼ I hope you guys liked this chapter! Moving forward now with March! Again, this is my first fanfiction in a long time so it's not perfect in anyway. But I'm working on being better, and I appreciate y'all taking the time out of your day to read into my delusions. K love y'all! ☆

☾ Previous Chapter: January ☾ Next Chapter: March

[ennaku-sirri-da]

Hey man Yknow what I’m actually kinda curious about what the basic plot of Roseverse is ngl. I mean from what I’ve seen habit is a big ol Grumpus muppet kinda fellow(BASED AS HELL BTW) soo ermmm, lore. Plz? *Looks at you with big ol eyes*

Okay I was gonna reply to this with a whole comic but it's taking a wHILE and I don't wanna keep you waiting THAT long so. Here's an answer in text for now!!

Roseverse didnt start out as an AU. It was a bunch of loose ideas all the way back in late 2021 for an idea I was struck with like when that Greek dude with the bathtub and the gold cried EUREKA! Except, you know, instead of making a huge scientific discovery I just made a bunch of nerd shit instead. Which is SOOO Haiderrrr /lh /affectionate

The idea was " What if Habit and Kamal were childhood friends"? ( Plaintext: What if Habit and Kamal were childhood friends? ) And so I worked off that basic premise. I took Habits diary pages, analysed them, and drew and thought out what he'd be going through and looked like at the time, with Kamal as well to mutually play off of each other. I did this ALL with my very good friend @prrusten 's help, hell we didn't even mean to make something so big, we were just talking and having fun and hitting it off!

But yeah. Here we are...Almost 3 years later! And now it's become a whole AU called Roseverse, after its Flower Kid sona/insert, Rose T. Flower. But it's not actually about him HwjjskHAKSJSJ--and its branched out beyond just Habismal though TBH Gillis is still the MOST underdeveloped character in the whole thing LOL I'll think of ideas for you one day someday muscleman. It's changed a lot too. There was a phase with Mad Scientist Kamal and everything. I don't think I'll ever post everything aha! But I will surely share content while I can.

Infact one of the changes is Habit's design...! You've seen some ofthe newer refs as opposed to Grumpus looking Habit, he looks more like a marionette. I still dearly love the old design...but messy stuff just happened and I feel immensely wrong using it again for newer art now. So I needed a specific revamp to indicate change for me. I don't really wanna get into every detail but I'll make a appropriate post about it one day or like update my pinned when I'm ready and know.

Here's a little drawing for you in the meantime Sharko! An old one but I think it still carries the spirit of the whole thing:

[ ID: Simple styled and digital colored art of Dr Habit and Kamal Bora from Smile For Me. It is in mostly dulled purple and pink tones. Habits hair gives a burst of rose and pink against the other tones.

He is closing his eyes and has caught Kamal in a hug from behind, leaning into his head. He looks worried. Kamal looks back at him, visibly tired, but there is a spark in his eye. Here his hair is long and falling down.

Whitish-purple text reads ‘’We’re in this together.’’ Then more transparent, ‘’Not Alone’’ and finally in bold clear text, ‘’Dont forget.’’ end ID]

And a song I more newly associate with Roseverse vibes...

[Thumbnail ID: A screencap from the anime Clannad. A man kneels on the ground to tightly clutch a little girl who hugs back. The background is sheer white snow. End ID]

[ VD: The music sounds melancholic, with twinkling noises throughout, and a slowly played track with echoing ambience. End VD ]

-

Morning edit: Aw Sharko.. I'm sorry this happened right after I told you about it but I've decided Roseverse will be shutting down and I shall post no further content of it for the time being. I will still continue like, using this blog for S4M stuff and make fanart in the Canon style sometime later but yeah man... :") (teary smile emote)

[obvious-captain-rogers]

I'm working on a couple new fics, so as a Christmas treat I'll give you some sneak peaks under the cut ;)

This is from the steddyhands dads au that helps flesh out Ed and Izzy's backstory

“Oh. That. It’s er-” Izzy felt suddenly self-conscious under the scrutiny. “Just this thing that we started when Jude was a baby.” Izzy shrugged, careful not to jostle Jude in the process. “Was Fang’s idea originally.”

“Tell me about it?” Stede asked, clearly seeing Izzy’s reluctance.

“Would be easier just to show you,” Izzy admitted and then stood, looping an arm beneath Jude’s bum to keep him settled against Izzy’s chest while passing his mug off to Ed, before making his way over to their little bookshelf.

Izzy pulled the book he was looking for off the shelf and made his way back over to the couch, propping it up against his thigh just behind Jude’s back. It was a faded yellow scrapbook with Jude’s full name scrawled in Sharpie across the bottom and with a wallet photo sized window in the middle. The photo was of Jude the day after he’d been born, still in the little hospital bassinet and  slightly wonky hat. “Every year, around Jude’s birthday, we add some pictures from the past year into the book.” Izzy shifted a little nervously as Stede took the book from his hands with more reverence than it really ought to have warranted.

“This is lovely, darling,” Stede said quietly and gently opened up to the first page. Izzy felt his face get hot with embarrassment as Stede quickly had to bite his lip to keep from laughing outright at the first photo. It was pre-Jude, when Izzy was still pregnant and obviously miserable. Fang had taken the photo when Izzy was crashing with him.

“Shut up, Bonnet,” Izzy grumbled and shoved at Stede’s shoulder. “Morning sickness was fuckin’ awful.” The photo was Izzy, clearly having just stumbled out of bed in an oversized t-shirt and his boxers, with his top half slumped over the toilet and flipping off the camera without looking.

“Oh darling, I’m sorry. I just wasn’t expecting it,” Stede said and reached out to lay a hand on Izzy’s knee placatingly. “You do look perfectly miserable.”

“Hyperemesis gravidarum,” Izzy muttered. “Stupidly fuckin’ rare so of course...” Izzy scowled and shook his head. “Was why I swore that after Jude was born that was it.” Izzy pulled a face. “Didn’t get this out to look at me. Fang put them in there, said I would appreciate them later.” Izzy still didn’t, not entirely though he supposed he was more content that they were there to be bitched at rather than not there at all.

Izzy flipped through the pages of when he was pregnant and Stede let out a soft gasp when Izzy finally let him look properly. They were finally where the pictures of Jude started. The first one was of Jude in the hospital right after he was born, all pink and squalling. Then there was the picture of Izzy holding him for the first time.

“You were so young,” Stede said delightedly as he absently smoothed his thumb over the part of the photo that had Izzy in it. His hair had been darker then, none of the grey that now streaked through it.

“Jude’s only five,” Izzy scoffed but he felt a small smile tugging at the corner of his mouth at Stede’s enamored expression. Then Stede turned the page and the photo was the first time that Edward had held Jude.

Izzy winced and looked away from the photo. It was a sweet picture, and Edward looked endearingly younger in it as well, but it brought back some ugly memories. Izzy could almost hear the sounds of shattered glass and Edward’s shouting.

and then this is from the silverflint writer/actor au I'm working on, linking the pinterest so y'all get the idea

Flint had to sign off for the scripts when the rest of the post came. He smiled politely and nodded before turning back into the house and flipping through the rest of the post methodically. He wasn’t avoiding them, per se, but if it turned into something, he didn’t want to have to put it on pause because he needed to pay the lighting bill.

He peeled open the document mailer and tipped the scripts- there were three of them- out onto the table alongside a note in Thomas’s spindly scrawl.

You can thank me later when you’ve said yes

-TH

And beside his initials, he’d scribbled down a lopsided little heart that had Flint rolling his eyes fondly.

Flint set the note to the side before he grabbed up the script for the pilot episode and moved over to his loveseat. It was the most comfortable spot in his house and there was plenty of light from the window.

Flint blinked in surprise as he realized that the show was sci-fi. There wasn’t anything wrong with the genre, Flint had watched many an odd and probably not very good sci-fi movie because Miranda liked them and Thomas found the idea of them fascinating. He wasn’t surprised that Miranda was enthusiastic about the project.

Within the first handful of pages, Flint was pulled in.

He forced himself to set down the script in the middle of the pilot episode so that he could snag the other two from where he’d left them on the dining room table so that once he was done, he could just read straight through.

He hated telling Thomas that he was right.

[incarnateirony]

Big ball of trans issues inside

Been doing a lot of meditating. Maybe it's the time of year. Maybe it's the fresh catalyst. But I'd been considering personal life issues, relationship life issues, and the irony of "I don't have dysphoria tho" and then getting fucking hit with my own invisible baseball bat relentlessly from the blue suddenly. Oh, there it is. Nevermind. THERE IT IS I FOUND IT

So I almost didn't post this and didn't know where to start it, but figured it might help someone else. Warning, there's going to be adult content in here. Not like, porn, but I mean, I'm not gonna pull punches.

So anyway, first note is: SPN fandom is actually the only place anyone gendered me *female* in online as a default. Maybe it's just because it's generally assumed around here. Maybe it's because I was doxxed like a week into fandom the first time. I don't know.

But in days old, when I ran a famous giant early 2000s server, at best, "who the fuck is Minerva? Minerva is black crest? Minerva is Ave? So Minerva is a dude. Who the fuck is Minerva I've seen 20 Minervas and I've never met her. Him." since I've ALWAYS been the ghost in the matrix.

But those were the names I generally got known on individually--masc characters, couldn't write women for shit. Did I manwhore as a top Asmodeus in my teen years? Absolutely. To say I explored my sexuality through a masc mindset is an understatement.

So yeah, you have a few late teens/early 20s girlfriends/fuckbuddies/whatever. Then I got dragged into my life survival shit. You've heard it. From human trafficking to escape to domestic incidents I've been doxxed over about before there too. Then I went back to one ex-girlfriend in the mess that became a wife and finally settled down from bouncing around.

I mean it when I say staying still is weird for me. I still kind of want to get an RV and disappear. Again. But right this time. But I need a copilot, that's how this works, that's the whole thing.

But in that time, my wife and I started hot again and went cold again. Cuz turns out, I'm a great bang your brains out at the bar or hiking trail or bathroom flash in the pan, but not something your average Middle Class Woman who Wants To Explore The Lesbian Facet Of Her Bisexuality had in her head, I guess.

I spent a good deal of time getting bitched at for literally sounding/moving masc during intercourse and she wasn't even big on what one could call complimentary toys to that. And over time, we just kind of fell apart, sat in different rooms, and she got hostile to even talk to or sit in the room of long before the split. Anything above handling her like a vase in lesbian porn was Being Too Rough. And like yes I will worship you i will do so many things to that vase but after a certain point, I'm sorry, I'm invisible balls deep and I'm fucking the shit out of you, and you generally don't complain when you're yodeling as yall do.

So anyway, why talking about this old stuff? Because coming out was basically the catalyst point for everything else. The split/divorce, moving, me having to expedite a certain project I was sending before I lost it all in the chaos, trying to rebuild my life even before the health crash while letting her keep everything.

So my trans journey and consideration started quietly in those closed off rooms, and got shut out when I even hinted about it, or just waved it off and said don't worry about it, but that's like when the light switch hit, and she ran and got a job and tried to kick me out of the house I'd been paying for, for years, with her first check.

So you can get a bearing on like, I've sat alone, happily single, in my lil covid safe disability box, with occasional special friend visits. I mean, Discord keeps me in contact even with real life friends, and their lives are busy.

I kinda put in my head I'd just be a bachelor forever and had generally assumed I was, I don't know, ace? I put my horny jail so securely in a closed off box it's like I turned off the animal side of me and became the hyper-cerebral asshole everybody knows.

And then I dunno. A switch got hit. And I can't turn it off. And I realize I've truly always been like this, from my early jackoffs to my first fantasies I always sat from the "wrong" perspective. It even made porn uncomfortable because I didn't know how to sit and look at it and so on. My wife already shut down that part of me a LONG time ago. But it's because that part was there.

Like oh I'm not ace, I just completely hid from anything that activated that element of my persona. I see. How do I turn it off now. Because the second they flirt back or idk even joke about nudes it's like running back into that box, because no, what can I even send?

I never even thought about "properly" transitioning, because nobody was really gonna perceive me but me and my closest friends. But damn what the fuck it's there so bad now that's hanging there on the plate. And people say Do It For Yourself or whatever, and that's true. But when I'm safely alone in my box, Myself doesn't need that. but it takes even connecting these pieces to really get it. Like oh that explains literally everything about me and my relationships, neat. So doing it for myself still apparently has an element of Someone To Do It For that makes the switch get stuck on running up the horny dysphoric light bill. Rent free. All the time.

And when you're, in that case, the hopeless simp throwing through the shop window at something entirely out of your league that gets REAL AWKWARD. So I'm currently sorting through if this really is going to become a goal in the next few years. I mentioned thinking about it when my legs started going out. It's still there on the brain.

So idk, maybe this is an experience someone else has been smashing their head off the wall on themselves that might help.

And most of all if you're like me and get hit with some weird need to cry through it, don't fight it just go through that, once you let yourself have that it gets better I guess. It doesn't go away but gets better. I don't know how else to describe it. That's at least when I guess I let myself really own it.

[popp1nstaxr]

❝Call You Mine❞ ||O.S||

↻ Content: Ship Taegyu—TXT

↻ Taehyun: Bottom

↻ BeomGyu: Top

↻ Fluff ♡

English is not my first language, so if there are any grammar mistakes I'm sorry and I'm open to any correction <3

• Description:

You said, "Hey, what are you going to do for the rest of your life?" And I said, "I don't even know what I'm doing tonight." It went from a conversation to your lips on mine. And you said, "I never regretted the day I called you mine." So I called you mine.

—Based on the song "Call You Mine" by Bebe Rexha ♡

══════════════════════━━

September 26th, this day would have been special if it weren't for the fact that I broke up with you, almost two years together, if it weren't for the fact that I broke up with you before the second year. And here is an 18 year old boy walking alone on the streets aimlessly, looking at the stars thinking about everything that happened.

The stars seem to be telling me to go back to him, that I need him in my life.

I'd love to say they're lying.

And just for the sake of going somewhere aimless, I ended up on a bar seat, drinking a few glasses in silence and alone, slowly, the night is long so I can depress myself in peace.

I felt that someone sat down next to me, I didn't take any notice and continued to drink from my glass of beer quietly.

—One whiskey.—said the person.

After a few minutes I felt the sound of a glass being placed next to me.

I continued drinking from my glass of beer without even looking at that other person, I was not interested at all. I put my arms on the table and leaned my head on them.

—What a shitty life—I whispered.

—Don't say bad words.

I immediately raised my head and saw beside me, he stared at me and I stared at him.

Fuck, his eyes are still hypnotizing me.

—BeomGyu...

—Hello, TaeHyun.

I bit my lip nervously and averted my eyes from his face to the other side, staying silent.

It was awkward, we hadn't seen each other for several months after our breakup, back then I was only 17 years old, oh right, it's only been a year.

—What happened to your life, Taehyun? If I remember correctly, you had everything planned.—BeomGyu commented.

I let out a small laugh, why did everything suddenly become so difficult?

—I don't even know what I'm going to do tonight...— I whispered loud enough for him to hear.

BeomGyu let out a laugh.

—And what happened to TaeHyun the organizer and perfectionist?—he asked with a lopsided smile, I watched him and let out a sigh, looking down at my empty glass on the table.

—Uhm... He left the same day that... that I broke up with you—I said without even looking at him.

I was feeling pretty overwhelmed with everything, Beomgyu was always my support, still I let him go... for my sake.

It was so strange to have such a conversation with him now.

—Did your life become chaos...?—He asked, he looked at him again and I saw how he drank from his glass of whiskey, he was looking at me in such a penetrating way that I swore he knew what I was thinking.

I nodded in response to his question.

—I don't know what to do anymore—I added.

—Crying is sometimes a good option.

I let out a sarcastic laugh, he knows I don't share those thoughts and yet he insists.

—Crying is for the weak, the strong-...– He interrupted me.

—They come out ahead despite all the bullshit.—He commented with an amused smile.

Did he just finish MY sentence?

I watched him for a few seconds, blinking several times, that was mine, let him look up his sentence.

I smacked his arm.

—It's my sentence, you don't finish it. Dumbass—I said and wrinkled my nose, I used to do those things too... I was annoying.

He let out a laugh.

—Well, shut me up for next time—he said amused.

—Yes, in one fell swoop—I said almost threateningly.

Another laugh, is he sick or why is he laughing so much?

We were silent for a few seconds, it was uncomfortable. We continued like that for many, too many, very long seconds, until I finally spoke.

—TaeHyun...

I made a little sound with my throat, giving to understand that I heard him, while I finished drinking my second glass of beer.

—Why did you finish me?—He suddenly blurted out, I choked a little on my alcoholic beverage.

God, I would have preferred the awkward silence.

—I... I don't know.—I whispered the last while playing with my fingers around the glass.

—TaeHyun...—He called back.

I looked up and in less than a second his lips were on mine, they were moving so softly that I couldn't help but close my eyes and reciprocate, my arms went around his neck and he put one of his hands on my chin. To feel this again was... beautiful, I felt again the churning of emotions in my stomach, maybe it was the alcohol in my system or my nerves, but I swore I wanted to vomit, his lips were even better than I remembered.

We had to break apart for air. Damn air.

We both had our foreheads pressed together and our breaths hitching, I couldn't help but smile.

Without saying anything, BeomGyu grabbed my hand and pulled me out of the Bar.

And here we see two teenagers running through the streets when they remembered they didn't pay for the drinks.

—If I end up in jail I'll blame you all your life—I joked as I ran away from the bartender who was following us.

—It wouldn't be the first time, now run— he said as he laughed.

—BeomGyu!—I said laughing in the same way.

I didn't think I'd see myself running through the subway in trouble again and even less with BeomGyu by my side.

We both ended up in the park that was nearby, behind some bushes, both lying on the grass.

—Calm down TaeHyun.—Beom said to me, but I could not.

The situation made me laugh more when I remembered the thousands of times that we both ended up spending the night in jail because of escapades like that, it was clear that our relationship was something unforgettable, Beomgyu was always someone quite spontaneous.

—I'm sorry.— I said while I was holding a laugh, God, this was so funny—Do you remember the last time we went out?

And I burst out laughing again.

—YeonJun had to bail us out of jail that time.—he commented, laughing a little.

—Yeah... That wouldn't have happened if someone, I won't name names, had thought to bring money and pay the restaurant, maybe it wouldn't have ended up like that.

—I already explained to you why I didn't bring money TaeHyun!—He exclaimed defending himself, it was true, he didn't bring it because he forgot it at home because he was so nervous to see us again.

Just like his keys later.

—Yes, but it was so funny.— I commented, finally calming my laughter.

—I told you you'd be laughing about it later.—Beomgyu said victoriously.

— still had to scold you, how do you ask someone out and forget the money.—I laughed said again.

—Anyway, it was fun, look on the bright side TaeHyun.—He said smiling.

I rolled my eyes and stopped looking at him to look at the stars with a slight smile.

I felt him settle down next to me on the grass, we were both looking at the stars in calm, there was silence and this time it was comfortable, as if the silence said everything that can't be said with simple words.

We stayed a few minutes in just silence, just enjoying each other's company, until BeomGyu spoke.

—TaeHyun.

—Yes?

—Why did you break up with me?

That question again.

I was silent only and turned to look at him, he was looking at me waiting for an answer so I just went straight.

—I was afraid—I confessed

He looked at me confused.

—Afraid of what?

—That you'll leave me.

—What? TaeHyun-

I interrupted him.

—Y-You... you'd already go to college, this would be your last year in high school and... and we'd be separated, you'd meet new people that might catch your attention and you'd leave me aside and that I... I couldn't stand that... I turned my eyes to the sky... My chest hurts just thinking that I wouldn't have you with me and I could lose you, that you'd get away from me, so... I decided to get away from you first, so the moment you leave and forget me, it won't hurt me... or at least, not so much.

Finally, I said it.

The lump in my throat grew bigger, I was struggling internally not to cry.

—TaeHyun, a person never stops meeting new people, that's life and you have to adapt to it.

Thank you BeomGyu, I love how good you make me feel.

—After we finished, I met new people, several of those people will be going to the college I will be going to.

Oh great, I'll change.

—And none of them interest me, you're the only one I'm interested in, okay? Who else would think of having a pet snake? Who would think of mixing drinks even when they couldn't drink? Who would call me at three in the morning just because one of their book characters died? Who would listen to those complaints about how boring horror movies are? No one, TaeHyun, you are unique and that's why I can't get you out of my mind at any time, no matter what I do, something always reminds me of you and because of that I live constantly thinking about you, just waiting for the weekend to come so we can both snuggle between the sheets and watch movies, I promise you, I wouldn't trade you for anyone, no matter how many people there are, I only want you. No one else.

Now I'm crying.

—I wiped away some tears that maybe came out without my permission, I love you too... very much.

He let out a laugh and hugged me, I could have pushed him away and run away to cry in peace, but it's better to cry in his arms.

—This counts as a reconciliation..?, I can't stand not being able to sleep with you any longer.—he said and left kisses on my forehead.

—I guess so... can we go to your place and watch a movie before we go to sleep?

—If we don't get caught by the police on the way, then yes.

I let out a laugh, I really, really missed him.

[casspurrjoybell-20]

FOOLS Fall - Chapter 23 - Part 2

BOOK TWO: The 'Fools Fall in Love' Trilogy

*Warning - Adult Content*

Samuel Moretti

Finally, I got to see my boyfriend on Friday.

I was so excited, I attacked him into a hug in the parking lot where he met me at my car.

Noah took my over night bag as I shut the trunk of my car and we headed for the apartment building.

"How was traffic?" Noah asked.

"Ugh, horrible. I swear I almost got hit three times," I whined.

"Don't say that, that makes me nervous," he admitted.

"I'm just glad I'm here."

In our apartment, Noah set my stuff down as I kicked off my shoes.

"Are you hungry?" Noah asked as we walked into the kitchen.

Instead of responding, I pulled an envelope from my back pocket and held it out for Noah.

"Happy nineteenth birthday," I said with a smile.

"Babe," Noah groaned.

"You already got me something."

"Just open it. Jeez-Louise," I rolled my eyes but was smiling still.

He sighed and tore open the envelope.

He pulled out two plane ticket confirmation sheets and a brochure of where I was taking us.

"What is this and why does it say you bought two plane tickets to Dominican Republic?"

"We're going to Punta Cana, baby," I grinned.

"Sam, what the fuck, this is expensive," he spoke incredulously, shaking his head and shoving the envelope and papers back in my hands.

"No."

I knew this was how he'd react.

Noah and I grew up differently, where I had a big home and grew up without money issues, Noah had it different.

He didn't have to big home and he always worked hard for every penny just so his father could take it from him.

So whenever I got him a gift above twenty dollars, he flipped and refused to take it.

"Noah, you've been through a lot and I thought you could use a nice, relaxing vacation. It's no big deal. I want to go," I insisted.

"Return them, I'm not kidding, Sam. You're not spending this much money on me."

"On us and I'm not returning them, so you either go with me this summer or I'm going to be very upset and bring someone else to rub suntan lotion on my body," I said sternly.

Noah's jaw was set, seeming angry.

I set the tickets on the kitchen counter and grabbed his waist.

"I got us this beautiful resort right on the water and at a good price. You deserve a vacation. Enjoy it."

Noah relaxed and took a breath, placing his hands over mine.

"Okay. I'm sorry. This is very generous, thank you but I'm paying for any extra expenses."

"Deal," I smiled but I knew I wasn't going to follow through with that.

Buying the tickets I was sure were going to be just as expensive as the money we'd spend there but it would be worth it.

Nonetheless, I went up on my tippy toes and kissed him, his hands going behind my ears and kissing me back.

The plan was to go out to dinner at seven with Noah's friends and then go back to our apartment to celebrate Noah and Jude's birthday but at around six, Noah's mood had shifted.

"Are you okay?" I asked after shutting off the blow dryer.

We had taken a shower together and then started getting ready.

I just finished my hair.

Noah just shrugged.

"Talk to me, what's wrong?"

"I don't know. I don't normal do anything today but lay in bed," Noah said.

"We don't have to go," I told him, as I sat next to him on our bed, placing a comforting hand on his thigh.

"You have every right to cancel."

Noah scoffed.

"We have to be there in less than an hour."

"So what? They don't know why you have a hard time on this day but..."

"Jude knows," Noah told me nonchalantly as if it wasn't a big deal.

My heart throbbed uncomfortably at his words and I had to question him to make sure.

"You told Jude about what happened on your thirteenth birthday?"

It was wrong of me to feel any type of negative feeling towards that but I couldn't help the nauseated feeling in my gut.

I mean, Noah didn't even tell Kaitlyn and they dated for like four years and to share something so personal?

I kept picturing Jude being 'comforting' to my boyfriend.

Ugh.

Noah shrugged.

"Yeah."

"That's a very personal thing to tell someone. You never even told Kaitlyn or your brother about that. You barely know Jude," I couldn't shut my mouth.

Why couldn't I just keep quiet?

Noah's mood went from anxious to announce.

"I do know Jude and I trust him, why are you getting upset?"

"I'm not getting upset, I'm just confused."

But I was upset and I hated that.

I was being selfish and I knew it.

Why would Noah tell Jude something so personal?

"There's nothing to be confused about," Noah said matter-of-factly.

"It just seems like..."

"Like what, Sam?" Noah stood up and looked down at me as he spoke.

"This is my thing to tell people if I want to tell them."

I got up as well.

"Of course it is, I know that."

"Then stop making it about you."

Annoyance to anger in a flip of a switch.

"I'm not, you're getting defensive. I didn't even say anything about me, I know you can share your past with anyone. All I was saying was for someone who keeps their feelings to themselves, I was just a little shocked. That's it."

Noah closed his eyes, took a deep breath, then reopened his eyes.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to come at you, this day just gets to me."

"I know, I'm sorry if I made it about me, that wasn't my intention but Noah, if you're feeling too overwhelmed, we don't have to go."

"I want to go. Jude's right, I can't let Randy control this day."

I didn't even care about Jude's opinion on the matter, I hated Jude.

"Okay but it's also about you being comfortable."

"I'm fine. We're gonna be late if we don't..."

The doorbell rang, cutting Noah off.

I sighed and followed Noah out towards the front door.

"I thought we were meeting them," I said and tried not to sound annoyed at the thought of driving with Jude to dinner.

"We are. It's probably just Ciera."

But it wasn't Ciera when Noah opened the door.

I couldn't see who it was from Noah blocking my view but my boyfriend seemed to freeze and his face, from where I could see from the side, got ghostly white.

"Mom?" Noah questioned and my heart dropped into the pit of my stomach.

"Happy birthday, baby."