#i've written 100k just for one scene

[melting-houses-of-gold]

20 Questions for Writers

Thanks for the tag @chocmarss! ✨

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

10 (but 9 that are visible!)

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

99,253 (so close to 100k!)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Star Wars (and ACOTAR in my google docs) and I'm trying to branch out into other fandoms for fun!

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

could we live with just a taste?

The Valley of the Mythosaur

you are the beloved, longed-for destination in the end

just desserts

had we but world enough and time

5. Do you respond to comments?

I try to! I usually only do when I post something new, but given how slowly I've been posting, I'm trying to respond quicker.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

This one

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

This one!

8. Do you get hate on fics?

no, not yet, and I'm a sensitive bean so please don't start!

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I do, but definitely aim for more sensual than explicit? I feel like with all things in my writing, I try to go more for vibes. If you're looking for something that's SUPER explicit and porn-y, I'm not your gal but there are plenty of other great writers who are and rock it!

10. Do you write crossovers?

I have!

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Nope!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yep!

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

I have so many ships, just in star wars alone!

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Cries in the 1980s. iykyk

16. What are your writing strengths?

I'm not great at giving myself compliments, especially when it comes to writing, but I always try to go for good imagery in my writing. I want the reader to feel like they're right there with the characters, experiencing what they're experiencing. It's why I usually go with present tense so that you can be breathless alongside them, happy when they're happy, etc.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I think I focus too much on inner angst and thoughts. Sometimes I'll go multiple paragraphs in a draft and realize nobody has spoken or moved in a thousand words!

I get too wrapped up in perfection. I'll rewrite a scene a million times, and sometimes it makes it better and sometimes you just gotta make it good enough, you know?

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I would love to do it more!

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Twilight -- don't go looking!

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

ooh so tough! I love and hate all my fic equally, but I'm having a lot of fun with this road trip AU that I intend to get back to!

Tagging: @acatinwinterfell, @shardminds @beesays and anyone else who'd like to participate!

[rmd-writes]

Ten Questions for Writers

Thanks for the tags @cha-melodius @orchidscript @firenati0n! I think I did one of these earlier this year but let's go again anyway

How many works do you have on AO3? 86

What's your total AO3 word count? 666,561 but this includes several co-written fics so my actual word count is probably at least 100k less than that but I have no way of tracking that

What fandoms do you write for? RWRB, 911 LS, Schitt's Creek

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? Yes! I try to respond to almost all of them - I love receiving comments and really appreciate when people take the time to leave them vs just hitting that kudos button. There are some collabs that I don't reply to the comments on, mostly because it's hard to tell from my emails/ao3 inbox which chapter the comment was left on and I don't know whether it was mine. I know I can click through, but I don't always have time!

Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not that I'm aware of

Have you ever co-written a fic before? Yes and I love doing it!

What's your all-time favourite ship? Yes.

What are your writing strengths? Smut with feelings, banter/dialogue, descriptions of people. One of the best comments I've ever received said that the scene I'd written was so intimate the reader almost felt like they were intruding by reading it 😭

What are your writing weaknesses? world building, coming up with pretty metaphors, I think I'm repetitive

First fandom you wrote for? Schitt's Creek

Tagging: OPEN TAG! but also @kiwiana-writes (specifically to make them answer #7), @welcometololaland, @indestructibleheart, @lightningboltreader, @liminalmemories21,

@three-drink-amy @freneticfloetry @strandnreyes @reyesstrand @heartstringsduet

@stereopticons @carlos-in-glasses @cricketnationrise @myheartalivewrites @alrightbuckaroo

@tintagel-or-cockleshells @hippolotamus @clottedcreamfudge @everwitch-magiks @wordthieve

[dinodogs]

honestly its so fucking sad how hard the whiterose community has degraded. Its to the point I'm pretty actively making whiterose content, I've written entire 10k word fics, drawn entire scenes, and started entire animatics I've just never shared with anyone outside my friend group because so many of you are just insufferable.

And I enjoy making this content. I'm genuinely having fun, the only time I'm not is when I have to deal with other whiterose shippers.

And I'm not the only one. My best friend (@grimmgrinningghouls he is okay with me tagging him) has been making whiterose content for years without showing anyone. this man has like 100k words worth of fics and dozens of artworks he's also just never shared because the community is that bad.

Another friend of mine who's asked not to be tagged wrote an entire fanfic and never even shared it outside me and two other friends.

Its just so, so incredibly sad there are so many talented people creating content for whiterose and this community is so insufferable they just...don't want to share it. Like seriously thats fucking sad.

[starryeyedjanai]

🥤+ 🪐

thanks for the ask! 🥰🥰🥰

🥤 ⇢ recommend an author or fanfic you love there are so, so, so many authors i love and admire and the list would be way too long, so i am just going to name a few fics i recently read and loved:

baby what's the scene? by @carbonbased000 incredible, showstopping, so hot. had to stop reading several times and collect myself

Mr. Harrington, You're Trying to Seduce Me by @3minsover just so unbelievably hot. my note in my spreadsheet for this fic is "scorchingly hot"

reach out, touch faith by @occasionaloverboy i love this so much. the note for this one in my spreadsheet is "he's got the gendah and the panties to match"

Nature Offers a Violence by @cheshiredogao3 this was SO good. i finished this a few days ago and i am still turning this fic over in my mind

Wrap Me Around Your Finger by @steddielations this is so, so good. incredibly hot and tender and actually made me tear up at one point

🪐 ⇢ name three good things going on in your life right now

the farmer's market is opening back up next weekend and my bestie and i will get to go and walk around and have picnics in the park again🩷

my most listened to artist on spotify last year, xana, is coming to my city in june and i have tickets and i am extremely excited. i have not been to a concert since pre-lockdown and i am quite literally vibrating with excitement

i've been having so much fun writing lately. yesterday i hit 100k words written so far this year!

ask me things!

[mickittotheman]

hello new friend! ✨️

saw that post about random questions for your stories, i am yet to read much of your works besides the most recent galladrabble!

so help me get started, what's your favourite fic you've written? maybe your favourite line even? what inspired it?

New friend❗️❗️❗️❗️ 💫✨️ Thank you so much for the ask, I've been waiting to get home from work ALL DAY so I can answer this lol.

So, I do have some (very old) works floating around from past fandoms, but so far the only gallavich fics I've posted have been my drabbles.

But! I have been working on a gallavich fic since like a few weeks before I even made this sideblog, and by "working on", I mean "like over 100k into it so far and not even close to done"

Posting full chapters before I'm done with the entire fic always makes me nervous because what if i have a new idea and need to go back and change something, but I'm always happy to share scenes in the meantime!

Basic premise is it's a vaguely canon-compliant-ish au except they never met growing up. Ian is in his EMT post- Caleb era, and Mickey is newly escaped from the Milkovich House of Horrors and working as a bartender. Inspiration wise, I got this idea for one specific line (from IGGY of all people. like don't get me wrong Iggy is cool and all, but I honestly never thought about him that much until my need to write a stupid pun overcame me) and it somehow snowballed into an Entire Plot.

Anyways, long ramble aside, I have included one of the earlier scenes below if you are interested but if not of course that's fine okay byyyyeeeee 🫣 🤐 😶

__________________

“Third drink of the night, Red,” Mickey says, sliding the newly filled glass of sprite back over to him. “Gonna hafta cut you off soon.”

“Ha fucking ha,” Red grumbles. Glares. Doesn't even try to hide the amused sparkle in his eyes.

He’s been acting weird today, though. Weirder than he usually is, and he’s already usually pretty fucking weird, so that's saying something. 

He keeps shooting Mickey these little looks. Scrunching his brows together. Fiddling with his glass.

Mickey braces himself when Red suddenly takes a deep breath and opens his mouth, dreading what the guy might say. Might ask.

“Why do you call me Red?”

Mickey blinks. Out of all the questions he’d been steeling himself for, that hadn't been one of them. He’s not expecting it. Not expecting the serious look on Red’s face as he asks it. “Uh. Your hair. It’s red,” Mickey says like an idiot, as if the guy isn’t fucking aware of that fact.

Red huffs and rolls his eyes. Squints at Mickey suspiciously. Fiddles with his drink again. “Kinda starting to feel like you just don’t know what my name is.”

“Yeah, I don’t,” Mickey snorts.

Red falters. Nearly tips his glass over. “Seriously?” he asks. Looks a bit put out, a bit annoyed, a bit hurt, and over all really fucking ridiculous. “You don’t remember my name?”

Mickey cocks his brows. “You never fucking told me it, man.”

“I did! I–” Red’s eyes dart around, and Mickey assumes he’s flitting through his memories, trying and failing to find the moment he introduced himself. His skin goes all flushed (and Mickey doesn't think its adorable, because it’s fucking not) and he buries his face in his hands dramatically. “Oh my god. I am such an idiot.”

Mickey bites at his lower lip to reign in the smile threatening to pop up. Raps a fist on the bartop. “You good? You’re looking kinda red there, Red.”

Red splays out his fingers and aims a glare at Mickey from behind them. “Ian. My name’s Ian.”

Ian. 

Mickey rolls it around in his head, on his tongue, getting used to the flavor of it. Ian. It’s good. Short and sweet, just like ‘Red’. Same amount of letters and everything. Flows better, though, the kind of name that sounds good when it's drawn out long and slow in a groan.

Holy fuck does Mickey need to get it together, this shit is getting fucking ridiculous. 

Red– Ian– has regrouped himself while Mickey’s brain was falling to shambles. His pouty glare is back to full strength as he crosses his fucking treetrunk arms across his wide chest and fucking focus, Milkovich. “You didn’t think to fucking ask me what it was? This whole time?”

Mickey shrugs. Rubs at his lip. “Figured if you wanted me to know you would’ve told me.”

Ian uncrosses his arms to flail his hands around. Nearly knocks over his drink again. Mickey sagely reaches over and pushes it out of the danger zone. “Of course I wanted you to know! You think I wanted you to refer to me in your head by the color of my hair every time you think about me?”

“Who the fuck says I spend anytime thinking about your sorry ass?” Mickey shoots out, immediately on the defensive, because yeah, maybe he does spend too much fucking time thinking of Ian, but he’s not just gonna fucking admit to that.

Ian perks up at that. Grins that fucking grin that Mickey knows by now means trouble. “Didn’t say they had to be thoughts about my ass, specifically, but–”

“Shut the fuck up, Red–”

“Ian.”

“Ian,” Mickey mocks. He doesn't think he’s entirely imagining the way something sparks in Ian at the sound of his name in Mickey’s mouth, but he could just be confusing it with the way something in his own body gets set ablaze. 

They both swallow. Mickey can see Ian’s adam's apple bob with it. He forces himself to tear his gaze away from Ian’s throat.

He thinks maybe Ian might be flirting with him sometimes. Maybe. But he’s not sure. Isn’t used to this. 

Before, he’d always scope out his options, settle on a guy who seemed safe enough. Wouldn't have to say a word. Would just catch their eye, cock his brow, and jerk his head towards an exit. If they followed, great. If not, whatever. No skin off Mickey’s back.

He’s never done whatever this shit is. If this shit even is anything. Which, again, it could be.

Probably isn’t. He’s probably just gone too long without getting his dick wet. Is probably just pining like some fucking school girl after the unattainable quarterback, seeing signs that aren’t there. Fucking pathetic.

It ain't right. Mickey’s not fucking pathetic. He’s just not.

+++

That’s what he tells himself, at least, when he’s leaning his back against his front door hours later. Breath still panting, hand still shoved down his now sticky boxers, tongue still tasting Ian’s name, not even having made it to his fucking bed in his rush to get in and get off.

+++

[not-poignant]

It never used to be, but put like 200~ written sex scenes behind you, and one day as you keep trying to make them better and better they suddenly just become more challenging than the average action scene. (Because they are a kind of action scene).

I relate to this on a spiritual level. When I've done something enough times and have become good at it it starts to get difficult again. It's kind of a paradox. But I've learned that once I let go of always trying to improve something I'm already good at or 'make it better' I actually rediscover my enjoyment.

Your stories are some of the best I've read. And your smut is amazing because there's always worldbuilding and character development behind it. Perhaps I'm biased because I'm demisexual and I need emotional components to enjoy the smexy stuff 😅 But it honestly doesn't bother me that you don't write pure smut anymore.

Obviously i hope you don't stop writing it completely (I'd be sad if you only wrote gen fics going forward but I'd still read and love them) but you gotta do whatever's best for you. And if that means no longer writing sex scenes then so be it.

But just know that you don't have to get better at it because you're already the cream of the crop as far as I'm concerned.

Maybe you just need a break from writing that sort of stuff? You might rediscover your love for it after some time away. Just food for thought.

Anyway... looking forward to whatever you write in the future. We'll support you no matter what <3

Hi anon,

This is super kind, and I have definitely taken lengthy breaks from writing erotica (literally almost over a year). In fact two of my main stories over the last few years - Falling Falling Stars and The Nascent Diplomat haven't had smut in them partly for that reason.

Unfortunately it's still just a struggle. We all have things that don't come easily to us. I can generate characters as easily as breathing, and dialogue / character voice is an instinctive, natural skill. But erotica is just... yeah, challenging.

I definitely don't plan on stopping writing it! A bunch of my stories right now have smut in them and are going to have smut in them going forward. :D

I can't see me ever just writing gen honestly.

But yeah I've taken very very long sabbaticals from writing smut. The reality is even these days I can go 2-3 months without writing any, which is kind of amazing, because I write over 100k words in those 2-3 months. So there's definitely breaks happening.

I don't know that I am good at erotica, though I appreciate that you think so! I'm a bit unconventional re: how lengthy my erotica scenes are (and how character-growth focused they are lol), but AO3 taught me and I prefer AO3 sex scenes over all others.

...I wandered away from this post for 5 hours and then came back like 'oh you didn't press post to this yet?' so anyway sadlfkjjas I may be having problems writing smut for a wHOLE lot of additional reasons too lmao

[littlestsnicket]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers (except me because obvs I have done it). Spread the self-love ❤

ahhh this is so hard!! i ended up going with ones i felt were personal achievements at the time rather than trying to decide which ones were objectively best or my favorite because that was too hard :D

worth (3.3k) yendelion; missing scene from blood of elves. this was a nightmare to write and worth every minute of it. i am so proud of myself for sticking with it until i was genuinely happy with it instead of giving up and saying good enough.

in which ciri acquires an emotional support bard (18.5k) post season 2 fic. this is by far the most complicated thing i've ever written. there were so many character arcs and relationship dynamics to track and make sure they started and ended where they were supposed to to be obsessively canon compliant. i think you can get in the habit as a fic writer of really only dealing with two characters at once, so this felt like a huge learning experience. i had to come up with a whole productivity tool to finish it too.

You can’t just say you’re leaving and head to the airport, or, Real Life is messier than a television finale (3.4k) abed centric community season 6 finale fic. this was something of a milestone for me. it was, at the time, the longest and most complicated fic i had written and also the first thing i had beta read. i still have literally all the feelings about this show and this fic.

slipping (.300k) olivia caliban fic. idk, i just really like this one and interconnecting drabble sequences are so much fun to write. and i feel like i always rec the same asoue fics, but i'm also really proud of all the drabbles i wrote for this fandom.

that wasn't here before (.100k) ian&barbara; doctor who. it's the very first drabble i ever shared with the internet (back in 2014), and i still think it holds up. and it's so on brand--somehow fan-wanky but joyful about it. doctor who is just riddled with 'continuity errors' and it's so much more fun to make them magical instead of whining about them.

(thank you so much for asking!)

[rattkachuk]

any hockeyrpf fics you willing to share? i could use a good cry

ohhhh for sure!! here are some in recent memory that really tugged at some deep emotions for me...

cut by daisysusan - mattdrai, so tenderly painful

home by now by daisysusan - mattdrai, just finished reading this the other day and!!! oof 100k beautiful dive into matthew's head, many feelings to experience here

the land between our bodies by yourblues - mattdrai, this one just fills me with a lot of emotions tbh

heavy lies the crown by Idday - mceichel, the way this one is written, the imagery...made me want to lie on the floor for hours.

rip the night wide open by Idday - mceichel, literally have thought ab this one every day since i've read it.

sing each song twice over by uraneia - sidgeno, ahh the pining...one scene in particular made me cry a lottt 

[jellys-compendium]

Fic authors self rec!♡ When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love❤

Thank you Mer, this is so sweet! What a great way to spread some self-love and self-encouragement! 🥰💞💞 Thank you for giving me a free pass to gush, I'll try (emphasis on try) and hold myself back as best as I can. 🤣

Just for Tonight - A Giyuu x Reader fic

I really like this one mostly because of the setting and the theme. This story takes place in a wooded snowscape, with mountains, snow covered pines, and frozen lakes. I really love writing stories that take place in these kinds of settings because I often imagine that I'm there and I find that very relaxing. This story also is heavy on themes of mutual pining and relationship angst. You know, the kind where two people love each other but can't be together because of external circumstances? I feel like Giyuu lends very well to that trope, given his story and the way he views himself. Also, this was the first fic where I wrote a scene with non-sexual physical intimacy where two people that are romantically interested in each other are exposed to one another, but instead of sex it's just tender and yearning touches. I really like how that turned out!

2. It's the Thought that Counts (Yes, the dildo fic)

This one is on the favorites list because it was a blast to write from start to finish! From the idea, to fleshing it out into a oneshot, to even tagging the thing (it was a delightful challenge), I really had fun "torturing" a very down bad Vash in this one. But I also have to say that another reason why I like it so much is because it inspired two other writers to write their own fics around that story and that was truly one of the most amazing things I've ever experienced. I was so honored and will never forget how much my heart pounded with excitement when I read both of those fics. 🥰

3. Plant Heat Headcanons & Mouthful

These are a collection of headcanons for Vash x Reader (and a little bit for Knives x Reader) and the reason why these are one of my favorite "fics" is because it really allowed me to explore the differences between each variation of Vash and Millions Knives (i.e., Trimax, Trigun 98, Trigun Stampede, BLR). It was really fun to explore each version's quirks and personalities and imagining how each would react in their own unique way. I do have my favorites of these versions, but it made me realize that at the end of the day, I really love them all!

4. Absolution

This one was an absolute beast to write and it will be one of my favorites for a while because it was the first for various things. It was the first time I wrote for Trimax Vash specifically, it was the first time that I really dedicated myself to a longer fic, and it was the first work in a longer series of mine that ended up being over 100K words in length. I did work really hard on it. As I continue to grow as a writer, there may come a time where I look back on it and think it's just okay, I'll still be proud of it because it was the first time that I was able to write a pretty decently sized fic with fairly heavy themes without chickening out. I'm not going to lie, when I posted chapter 2 of this thing, I was so nervous I was visibly shaking. My family thought there was something wrong with me. 😂 I had to take a walk to try and get rid of that nervous energy.

5. Pretty much all of my Dad!Vash content, but I have to pick one so I'm going to say my Cozy Dad Vash Drabbles

I love this collection of little fics dearly. They are silly, self-indulgent little pieces of seeing Vash as a settled down dad post the horrors he experienced in Trimax. These fics are definitely my comfort space. My heart always feels so full when I'm writing for Dad!Vash and his adorable little munchkins. Honestly, whenever I'm feeling bad about my writing (or just down in general), sitting down and writing a little blurb about this goofy dad trying to parent his kids always helps me feel better.

[read-and-write-]

2023 Fic Wrapped

Thanks to @anincompletelist for tagging me! This is such a fun thing to do!

Rules: Feel free to show whatever stats you have. Only want to show Ao3 stats? Rock on. Want to include some quantitative info instead of stats? Please do this. Want to change how yours is presented? Absolutely do that. There are no rules!

Posted on Ao3: 34,145 (Across 14 fics)

Written total: 152,778 (yes, i do have a lot of docs created, a lot more than anyone wants to see)

3 published fandoms: Red, White and Royal Blue, All for the Game, The Shadowhunters Chronicles

Longest work: and every song reminds me of you (4,088 words)

Shortest work: yo te llevo dentro, hasta la raíz  (546 words)

very real wips, things I'm actively working on

Super Six and the Siren's Call (PJO AU- +100k) co-written with @inexplicablymine and @happiness-of-the-pursuit one of the most wonderful projects I've had the honour to be a part of and I'm so exicted for people to see it

Toe the Line (Figure Skating AU - 20k currently) my dearest child, 60 pages of outline, investigation, character sheets and visions i have at three am for a random scene 5 chapter away

Y recuerda siempre que tú eres la medicina (A bilingual June character study) A companion piece of sorts for a train of thought (of things not to forget), June's perspective through it all, both in Spanish and English like Alex's. and with Natalia Lafourcade lyrics as a title because that's June coded

carved within the beauty, the darkness in between and without (your) love, I am nothing two pieces about religion and firstprince from each of their povs, a question about loving yourself and about loving someone else against the things you've been taught and finding divinity within each other.

not so real wips with a little less real word counts but a lot of vibes

Spiderman AU, my entry for the New Years Resolutions event of @thebrownstone, which means it'll get here at some point

MasterChef AU, my way to put my professional knowledge to good use, it was a silly funny story and it grew a plot

Dancer AU, a drabble fail that was just a vision and then some people kind of made it get a full dual pov, double 5 + 1 plot

Numbers are not everything but I do like data and stats

Kudos: 3,969

Comment Threads: 187

Bookmarks: 946

Hits: 37,149

Numbers do not define an author's worth, but I also can see how far I've gotten with just one day deciding I wanted to write and post my fun little words again

top 3 sorted by kudos

las formas de llamarte amor (2.5k - 630 kudos)

my first fic in the rwrb fandom, it makes me so happy to see it being loved, it was the ultimate show of self indulgence

Henry has been a public figure for most of his life, the reason why he’s been given dozens of titles, some kinder than others, he’s been the gay prince, the spare, the prince of England's hearts, the activist, the author. All of the titles are inevitably a part of his history, but the way Alex calls him is the most important of all. Because to Alex, he is sweetheart, amor, and corazón; Alex calls him mi vida in between kisses and whispers hermoso, lindo, precioso with his wandering hands working through Henry’s body. His name sounds better when it comes out of Alex’s lips. or 5 times Alex calls Henry a pet name in Spanish and one time he calls him by his name or Henry learns Spanish one pet name at a time

to belong to a family (even beyond this world) (2.5k - 578 kudos)

this one, this one i wrote with my own soul, i used my tears as ink, wrote it for the Halloween Huh fest and it all the comments have made me so incredibly happy

“Talk to him. They listen, they always listen,” Ligia says and Henry nods, she squeezes his hand again before turning back and leaving him alone in front of the ofrenda. It's very rare that Henry has been at a loss for words when he tries to talk to his father. He has spent countless nights speaking to the stars, looking for Orion and hoping that —wherever his father is— he is looking for it too. “Hi dad,” Henry says softly, taking another look at the picture of his father, smiling at the camera. “I missed you.” or When Alex and Henry go to Mexico for Día de Muertos a familiar face appears on the Díaz ofrenda

you are an idiot (i missed you) (1.6k - 475 kudos)

wrote this on a whim, blacked out and pulled this out of nowhere, my first fic for aftg and really just an excuse to write Andreil being married for convenience™

The best, and arguably the only, good part of playing on opposing teams from your husband was getting to play a match against him. Therefore one could say that Neil was very excited about getting to play against Andrew tonight. Not only because for the first time since the season started they'd finally be in the same State and City (And later after the game, the same house) but also because Neil thought Andrew was 100% hotter when he was playing (Not that he would tell him out loud), and seeing him live was definitely better than seeing him on a screen. There was also the added bonus of the infamous Minyard - Josten Rivalry. Or Neil and Andrew are having too much fun with their rivalry until someone else takes it too seriously, and then they have a talk.

Being a not native english speaker means that fanfic does teach me a lot of stuff, namely vocabulary this year stars some bangers

Saccharine

Ubiquitous

Litany

Chagrin

Filibuster

I created a total of 19 docs, which doesn't mean there's 19 fics there, but it also doesn't not mean it

Alex's POV wins with total of seven fics

Six fics have the tag of Alex Claremont-Díaz Speaks Spanish

Three of my wips have an outline longer than 10 pages

there's a 30%? chance I will write smut at some point in the new year

my funniest doc title is "If you have religious trauma and you know it clap your hands"

This year has been crazy, for many reasons but I'm glad I found this space and I'm glad I'm back to writing, and on top of it all I'm glad of being able to meet so many because of it.

And the year is not over yet! There's still more to come!

I'm tagging a few people, don't feel pressured to do this but if there's anything you feel proud of I'd love to see it @inexplicablymine @happiness-of-the-pursuit @affectionatelyrs @littlemisskittentoes @ssmtskw @raysletters @14carrotghoul @heybuddy-drabbles @suseagull04 @everwitch-magiks @sherryvalli @rockyroadkylers

[pawseds]

I convinced our Delta Green game master to have a play-by-post (basically text roleplay) section in our game's server and uhhhhh maybe I've been having too much fun with it. Writing is faster than drawing comics, what can I say?

(Long ramble about writing stories below hehe oops)

While we're here! A bit about writing: I like writing! I've written for loger than I've drawn for (because school). I think I'm better at writing than drawing for that reason (I'm more confident at least). I've written short stories. I've written short stories about TTRPG things. I've also written a ~100k word novel by hand for 2 years. While writing it, I had 'writing class' (technically AS/A level Ennglish Language classes). It was the only class I had confidence in and high expectations for.

With those 2 combined, I burnt out pretty quick LOL. Specifically, I had a big perfectionism issue because of the high expectations I had from my teacher and especially myself -- it was the one thing I knew excelled at in school, so I better do it well! After I was done with the novel and A levels, I was supposed to edit the novel. It's been years and I haven't done it yet, and I wouldn't write non-assignment stories (except 2) until now. Writing became more nerverwracking than it was fun, so why would I?

To get back to the PBP thing: I've been in a campaign that was fully PBP. With my mindset being the way it is, hey! This is just one big writing exercise, so I ran along with that and had fun with it. I saw how some players would make their own PBP and essentially monologue/have a scene only with their PC. That was cool to see.

And now, my current Delta Green campaign (tagged 'Helvetia'). Hrothgar (guy in drawing) and his kids were ported over from a previous D&D campaign (the fully PBP one!), so the crew had a very well defined background already. Of course I get tons of drawing ideas for them, except I don't have the time to draw them all (compsci hard). But since the server has a PBP section, I had like 2 weeks to kill between session 0 and 1, and I was bursting with ideas... I made a lot of solo PBPs that were essentially short stories.

It didn't quite hit me until some time ago, but the PBPs actually made me enjoy writing again -- enjoy it a lot more, in fact! I think the format of Discord threads and messages removed most perfectionism tendencies I had. I just had to fire the story away, message by message. It didn't have to be amazing, and it was fun! (Also I really don't know how to shut up with them LOL)

I'll definitely be cleaning these PBPs up and posting them here as stories. Some of them are just silly, fun, slice-of-life character sketches. (These were the stories I wrote after my novel... and yes, they were about my other set of Delta Green characters LMAO) (and I've posted them here under pawsedswrite btw!) But some I see as legitamite short stories that I would edit more heavily and present as a short story. They were the kinds I could see myself writing on a document rather than on Discord.

Well, I lied. 'I would edit' is false. I have already edited one, because I spent like 5-6h writing this one PBP (oops) instead of writing the draft for my short story class/elective (oops 2). I joked to my two friends saying that I could just submit it as my assignment. Apparently, they both really liked it and said the dialogued slapped. So I did!

I procrastinated like hell on it though, because I was very nervous to go back into the PBP with an axe to edit it. Being in a writing class where nearly everyone else has been formally studying writing for some years kinda puts some pressure on ya!

Like the last assignment (which I'll post here after editing), I had a lot of worries. But the feedback and grade I got from my last assignment, the peer review I got from the current one, and also the support from those two friends (shoutout @katastrofish <3) made me feel more confident in myself. And also the fact that I had a lot of fun editing the PBP!

Uhhh this ramble was way longer than expected LMFAO if you've made it this far, damn, thanks for reading! If you also write or have similar experiences, feel free to share em. And have a good day!

(bonus POV editing)

[ayaitch]

Fic authors self rec!

When you get this, share your favorite five fics that you've written, then tag at least five other writers. spread the self-love ❤

I wasn't tagged, but saw this around other Horizon fans, and wanted to try to do it as well. I typically struggle to think kindly toward my writing, but I do have a few that are definitely better than others. Enjoy! :D

A Light in the Dark - Star Wars Rebels, Kallus/Zeb, T - My first Kalluzeb fic. I actually think this one turned out quite nice. I feel that I did a pretty good job with the set up, execution, and tone of the story. Though it's technically pre-relationship, I tried to cram in as much subtle fluster and blossoming sexual tension as I could.

To Lives of Peace - Horizon, Ikkotah/Chekkatah, G - A canon-compliant fic for my favorite Horizon pairing. They're canon too, though we never get to see them together in-universe. I liked how this one turned out too. Short and soft (in my opinion), with a bittersweet ending, because we all know what happens.

The Unconquered Sun - Horizon, Fashav/Kotallo, M - I rate this as M because it's not happy or fluffy, but pretty tough. I've gotten mixed reviews for this story. Some have claimed it very good, others that it's depressing. The reason it's on my list is because it proved to myself that I can actually write a long fic. I'm not doomed to write only >10k word one shots. It's not my best work; it could really use an editor's touch to carve it down to under 100k words and tighten up the story, but I was so proud of myself for getting it all written and it turned out basically how I'd envisioned it. And I wrote it all under the cover of darkness so my now ex-partner didn't know about it.

Tenakth Territory, Not Carja - Horizon, Ikkotah/Chekkatah, T - This one was just really fun for me to write, and it turned out pretty OK, in my opinion. I love the idea that Fashav was a big ol' flirt with Ikkotah and Chekkatah boils over with jealousy. It's a dynamic that amuses me to no end. I should post the follow-up scene that I left in the comments section...

A Tender Touch - Star Wars Rebels, Kallus/Zeb, T - Self-indulgent pre-relationship fluff. I wanted Kallus to give Zeb a foot rub and they both feel bashful about how much they both liked it.

[pradnyesh1008]

COC: Journey So Far #1

Long time no see, huh? Yeah, I know. My bad. Life's been a whirlwind lately, and that thread issue was like a constant migraine. But hey, it's sorted now. Happened a few days ago actually. The reason? Well, let's just say it was... interesting. But I'm not here to rant, so let's leave it at that.

Now, onto the main stuff. This will be long so…

I've changed the name of the game. Might change it again, who knows? The universe's name probably won't change though, because everything starts and ends with The Golden Throne. All the events are happening because of it, for it. But hey, if you come up with a cool name that fits the bill, I'm all ears!

The first book, for now, is called Crown of Conquest. As the name suggests, there's gonna be some conquering done by our MC due to politics, scheming, and a whole lot of other reasons. So yeah, war is coming. Not as big as you might think, but it'll set the stage for violence, gore, and all that jazz. I want you guys to get a taste of how wars are fought in this universe. I don't want anyone caught off guard when the big wars happen.

Back to the topic, progress has been slow. I'm at about 10k words right now. Why so slow? Well, between studies and other less productive activities {yeah, I'm looking at you, Girl (if you are reading this)}, writing has taken a backseat. But I'm planning to update this twice before Hot D season 2 releases. So now, I'm gonna write as much as possible.

Remember the Gazebo scene? Yeah, that was a tough one. Some of you were upset, saying it was torture, misery for the MC. I did give warnings several times before the scene happened but still, some folks were taken aback. In this game, there will be several scenes which will be morally complicated for characters. I've written these lines in my rework too but I'm gonna share here so you might understand the concept of this game:

"This is the reality of your position, the reality of power. It’s not just about wearing a crown; it’s about making decisions that can change lives. It’s about carrying the weight of those decisions, living with the consequences. It’s about understanding that every choice you make will have an impact, will create ripples that will touch everyone around you. It’s about realizing that sometimes, there are no right choices, only less wrong ones. And it’s about having the courage to make those choices, no matter how difficult they may be."

That's the whole point of this game.

As for the asks, there are 40+ of them. Most are ROs related. I know I said I'd answer them, but I don't want to spoil the personalities of the ROs before your first meeting with them. So, I'll wait till your first interactions with the ROs are done. Other asks related to history and world are so good. Seriously, you guys have some very interesting and damn good theories and questions. I can't believe how much you all thought from this small 100k WIP. They are so fun to read. And the rest of the asks, bug related and other stuff, don't worry. I know about them, and they will be resolved in the rework. I'm also going to drop our Mentor's details along with their portraits soon. So, be ready for it.

And lastly, If I haven't forgotten anything. Thank you so much to all of you who are supporting this and are really interested in this game. Seriously, thank you.

Catch you on the flip side,

Pradnyesh

[merionettes]

part 1 of how rubicon got written is here. this is part 2, aka the essay about etc.

the thing about the storyboarding/drafting process that there is no way to describe is how totally obsessed i was for the duration. afterwards i tweeted something like, this is the closest i've ever experienced to demonic possession. i would get up, write all day—like, all day—and go to bed. turn off the lights. then i would just lie wide awake in the dark with lines and scenes and dialogue scrolling through my head until i gave in and opened my notes app. i could not turn it off even if i wanted to. and i didn't want to, i was riding that streak as far as it would take me. because i couldn't look down, right? i could sense what i was attempting to do and anything other than total tunnel vision full speed ahead eyes on the prize would mean i had to acknowledge it.

(context of what made this possible: i was unemployed at the time.)

for the first ~50k or so i was afraid that at any minute i could falter. when i got to the nationals meltdown, that was when i knew i could do it. like, no matter what happened after that, i had the willpower and the chops and i knew where i was going. even if the streak died.

but it didn't. i wrote 100k in a little under 4 weeks. i've never experienced anything like that in my creative life. 

—then obviously i had to get a new job and come back down to earth and it took 21 months to get from there to posting the epilogue. still. i will probably be chasing that high for the rest of my life. that was the part that like… made the rest of it possible. no matter how difficult or frustrating it was. that generated the roadmap. 

i've talked about this before in comments but i had insanely strong opinions about what was "right" and what wasn't. sylvain's narrative voice was a huge part of that. it's inextricable from the content; it shaped the story; it is the story. for the first couple months it also made me an unhinged stylistic tyrant. if there was one single unnecessary word that struck me as inorganic, as existing solely to make the sentence more digestible or to convey information beyond the fourth wall, it had to go. i could not rest until it did. 

once again: this is not generally the relationship i have with writing. lol. it's the demonic possession talking. this is why you have a ton of sentence fragments and stylistic tics and a refusal to let one single shred of information into the text that did not strike me as something sylvain would plausibly think or acknowledge he was thinking. and like, yeah. probably it didn't always make for the smoothest reading experience or the most satisfying narrative development. i'm dead certain there are people who picked this fic up and the bumps drove them out of their mind until they threw in the towel. i just didn't care. 

part of that was a reaction to my own old style—you know, the discomfort of shedding old skin. i'd look at those early scene attempts and see all the habits and crutches i'd been trying to move away from over the last two years and double down on The Voice. but part of it… i would get early feedback that wasn't at all wrong, like "what if [clarifying narration]," "what if [more interaction]," and i'd just think, but that's not true. in exactly those words! which is crazy.

(this is why it was fortunate this was fanfiction i was writing for free, i didn't have to compromise my bonkers experience any more than i wanted to.)

to be clear this feeling didn't last two years. i was eventually able to edit like a normal person. it did last probably longer than ideal. and the point when i was no longer running on unleaded creative adrenaline was when i started to really struggle with the middle of the story. i had to make choices as a writer, instead of relying on the purity of my divine vision or whatever, and i second-guessed myself a lot. it was much easier to feel that absolute bone-deep certainty of Right and Wrong, True and False. and the thought of fucking up when i'd gotten so far was unbearable—like, being so close to making the thing in my head reality and then dropping the ball and breaking the suspension of disbelief.

distance also made it possible to perceive what i was doing and be like, jesus mer what the fuck are you doing. why are you devoting so much of your time to a hobby, why are you investing so much of your life in something you will never be able to truly share, why are you living in a hole with no one else in it. why are you putting yourself through the wringer to get it down "right." why does it matter if it's as good as it can be. why do you care. why is this worth it.

i assume this was pretty obvious before this post, but if not it must be now. this story isn't really about figure skating. for me it's about writing; who knows what it's about for you. i didn't sit down and think, great, felix will be a metaphor. that's just how it happens. 

the experience of writing a novel for the first time: i'm saying this with my whole chest because at one point i wouldn't have, aloud. but what's the point in calling it anything else? i know exactly how much i invested in this. i'm the only one who can know. that's sort of the point. 

here's a giant collage of the inside of my head. i made it for myself and i take it very seriously. not exactly groundbreaking to say this is the ultimate exercise in solipsism. when you're doing that—what greater gift is there than to have someone else meet you in exactly the same place. any writer would kill for the kind of responses this story has gotten, and i don't mean praise. i mean the close reads, the free response essays, the total and complete validation that this thing inside your head that only you can see is real, actually. when i say thank you, it's not for liking it or praising it—it's for taking it seriously. i loved this thing. i still love this thing. thank you for taking it seriously.

[not-poignant]

Hi Pia! I was curious, as I understand, this story was written long time ago? Did you edit it with almost 10 years of practice on writing since 2014 now? And more in general, do you feel like writing is easier or not withos much practice (I read about smut, that it is harder now, but in general - worldbuilding, character creation and so on) ?

Hi hi anon!

Yeah the story was first drafted in 2014, and has gone through big edits since then (the latest being 2017, though I did some cursory stuff this year as well to just double check that it's not terrible).

Tbh, prior to 2014 I was writing like... very serious award winning short stories with tragic endings and winning awards for them, so I'm moderately confident the story is readable. I've been writing novels (for fun mostly) since 1995. And I have a university education in writing that started in 1999.

My fanfiction/serial style is very different to my 'I'm writing a book / I'm writing a short story' style.

I think it will feel different to my serials because I wrote it like a book, there's less sprawling character exploration, and the pacing is much, much tighter. There's a lot more focus on plot, and folks used to my serials might feel like the story ends really quickly! Because it's like much shorter (100k) than my serials.

If anything, I think these are the things to watch out for in Tradewinds:

100k novel means much tighter pacing and prose, and often very little time for too much character reflection.

Possibly not as much character exploration as people are used to from me (though there's still some!)

More plotting

Less smut, and the smut is also more 'vanilla' than what I normally write, because at the time I was a lot more wary about putting BDSM into the market. There are power dynamics though (i.e. a vibe where one character 'feels' more submissive to the other)

Robust scene-setting (i.e. description, place, anchoring)

Lively dialogue

I actually think I was probably a better literary writer back in the 00s but it wasn't much fun for me. I quit writing for a while and then picked it back up again to write fanfiction, which was easier and more relaxed for me. (And still is! The Ice Plague is an exception to that because it had more robust plotting and was structure more...formally.)

I honestly think writing gets easier or harder depending on the project and writing style involved.

Some writing gets easier with time, some doesn't. Sometimes that will flip or switch. Sometimes one thing is easy for years and then becomes harder with certain stories.

It was Gene Wolfe who said:

"You never learn how to write a novel. You just learn how to write the novel that you're writing."

And yeah, I tend to believe for the most part that's true with how hard or easy something is. How ambitious a project is, its genre, its length, its complexity can all play into that.

I pick easier projects as my main projects right now, but I have hard projects coming up too!

I would say overall writing does become "easier" in the sense that foundational skills become second nature (I know how to build a character and their dialogue now without thinking about it, and while there's always more to learn, I can now start in a place of just knowing how to do that instead of knowing I need to learn how to do that), but that the stories themselves will still pose unique challenges to a writer.

Er so TL;DR yes writing for me is easier but I'm choosing easier things to write, and sometimes it's still very hard!!!

[katie-delaney]

Writing Notes

I've decided this Tumblr can be for writing brain overspill as I'm writing along.

How is He Ate My Heart 100k plus long this is the longest fic I've ever written and it just came out of no where it was supposed to be a one shot. It's supposed to only have one chapter left and I'm already 8 pages written and haven't even got started, what is pacing and planning and how do I do it???

This other fic idea I've had is staring at me from the corner of the sofa and trying to distract me. It's gonna be called The Meat Grinder and its a sex worker Omega Bucky fic with Alpha Steve as his sort of handler/body guard, and Steve is absolutely not allowed to fuck him and just has to stand there watching him get railed every night and Bucky's desperately trying to get Steve to fuck him and. That's it that's the plot.

But I WILL finish He Ate My Heart first. Because Bucky isn't going to get himself mated and fucked all over Avengers tower is he??!

Also the reason that Steve is in a maroon tux in the club scene is cos I stumbled across this.