#idk i just don’t want to spam people

[psychmerchant]

i made a card for neo and i’m just so pleased with it, i had to show it off

[francy-sketches]

Why do people who enjoy spam liking always act so high and mighty about it ‘well I like it when someone likes all 200 of my posts bc it means they love and cherish my creations, I’m sorry you’re a cold hearted grinch and don’t have any appreciation for the common people who love your work, maybe if you stopped being such a snob ��’ ok bitch good for you?? I just like reading people’s comments/tags on my art and having a lot of individual like notifications clogs it up so it gets a little annoying that’s all. If spam liking makes you feel good that’s great I’m happy for you but it’s just a matter of personal preference it doesn’t make either of us morally superior lol get off your high horse

[kirk-says-wah]

do you guys want an update of St Anger tonight? I’ve got half of it written but don’t know whether to just leave it till tomorrow

[skhardwarevers1]

I think my main issue is I wanna be in love but I’m too scared of getting into a relationship that hurts me again

[just-rogi]

.

[daenerysstormreborn]

My blog is for me my blog is for me my blog is for me I tell myself as I notice a blog I like that I know I was following before is popping up in recommended and I’m not following them

[crowcryptid]

i made a stupid sideblog to dump twitch clips (in audio form) @canon-gabriel-quotes

This is only for audio stuff, sorry. you will still be spammed on here with everything else

I’ll probably post 1-2 later on.

I’ll post them as is and when possible with my attempt at recreating the echo effect so it’s more accurate. But if there’s music in the background I probably won’t do the effect cause it won’t work.

[mooooonnnzz]

don’t text and swing! // miles morales x reader

miles loves texting and he loves you, what could go wrong?

cute lil miles texting headcanons

sum short n simple

readers gender not rlly specified

ooc miles?? idfk how he would text so i tried my best 😭

requests r open!!

miles says mentirosa that jus means liar

⊱ ────── {⋅. ✯ .⋅} ────── ⊰

🕷️ You’re never guaranteed a full on conversation with Miles because most the time he leaves you on open. He doesn’t do it on purpose, really. He just so happens to be a very busy man so trying to talk to him when he isn’t saving New York is pretty difficult.

9:55 pm [ miles <3 ]: Hey did u still one of my jackets

9:55 pm [ miles <3 ]: *steal idk how i got still

9:55 pm [ miles <3 ]: Anyways I cant find it anywhere and ik u have something to with it

10:00 pm [ miles <3 ]: I know ur not ignoring me rn…

10:01 pm [ you ]: oh wow of course im the first person you blame

10:01 pm [ you ]: also i dont have it ☝️

10:02 pm [ miles <3 ]: Who else would take my jackets??

10:02 pm [ miles <3 ]: This also isn’t the first time my jackets OR hoodies have gone missing

10:02 pm [ miles <3 ]: And somehow they always end up in your room

10:03 pm [ miles <3 ]: Suspicious right…🤨

10:06 pm [ you ]: oh shit by some magical force

10:06 pm [ you ]: your jacket managed to teleport to my bed!!

10:07 pm [ you ]: and somehow…IT FLEW ON ME?? AND NOW IM WEARING IT?

10:07 pm [ you ]: this is actually crazy…

10:15 pm [ you ]: wait miles where did you go

10:25 pm [ you ]: are you mad?

10:30 pm [ you ]: no way ur mad

10:40 pm [ you ]: MILES

10:42 pm [ you ]: HELLO

10:43 pm [ you ]: MILESSSS

10:56 pm [ you ]: oh wait mb you’re probably busy saving somebody

10:56 pm [ you ]: got a lil crazy there

10:57 pm [ you ]: ignore all that

1:00 am [ miles <3 ]: I KNEW IT

1:00 am [ miles <3 ]: It’s okay i like you a little deranged 😩

1:03 am [ you ]: why are you texting me at one in the morning

1:04 am [ miles <3 ]: Why are you replying?

1:05 am [ you ]: have you been fighting since 10?

1:12 am [ miles <3 ]: I’ve been studying! 🤓

1:12 am [ you ]: LIAR i know what you are…

🕷️ You text him while he’s in the middle of fighting? You bet he’s going to respond. While giving himself a reasonable distance away from the villian, he holds out his pointer finger and says; “Hold on, let me respond to them real quick…” While they’re throwing punches at Miles, he’s dodging all of them while texting you back. Though, he’s text aren’t legible. At least he thinks they are! All Miles wants to do is talk to you, even if you don’t understand half the things he’s typing. Texting him while he’s swinging has the same effect. He has dropped his phone multiple times and he’s always caught it before it could land on the street, though when his webs come in contact with his screen it registers as someone typing so without even knowing he’s spamming you a whole bunch of jumbled letters.

3:45 pm [ you ]: hey miles can i come over for dinner

3:45 pm [ you ]: im craving ur moms food 😍

3:46 pm [ miles <3 ]: oys of cours

3:48 pm [ you ]: did u just have a stroke

3:53 pm [ miles <3 ]: noi busy

3:53 pm [ you ]: if you’re busy why r u texting me 😭

3:53 pm [ you ]: go back to fighting or wtv ur doing

3:56 pm [ miles <3 ]: i wMt to talk toyj

3:58 pm [ you ]: u can talk to me later miles

3:58 pm [ you ]: im not going away

4:00 pm [ miles <3 ]: hatr

5:46 pm [ miles <3 ]: HEYYY

5:46 pm [ you ]: HII are you not busy anymore

5:47 pm [ miles <3 ]: Yeah

5:48 pm [ miles <3 ]: How’s your day been?

5:49 pm [ you ]: it’s been ehhhhh

5:49 pm [ you ]: i’ve been missing you 😔

5:51 pm [ miles <3 ]: ooajbdko092828900

5:51 pm [ miles <3 ]: 08:$jjaoppapp

5:52 pm [ miles <3 ]: !!!!!

5:54 pm [ you ]: what

6:00 pm [ miles <3 ]: I DROPPED MY PHONE

6:01 pm [ miles <3 ]: ANYWAYS back to what you were saying

6:02 pm [ miles <3]: I’ve been missing you too

6:04 pm [ you ]: youre no better than those people who text and drive 😐

6:05 pm [ you ]: don’t text and swing miles

🕷️ He loves sending you videos of him showing off in his suit. He did a cool trick midair? He’s going to prop up his phone somewhere and start recording, once he perfects the move and edits out any unneeded footage and he sends them to you. He’s all giddy when he does, in his head he’s like, “Will that impress them?” “Do they think that’s cool?” “They’re going to love this!”

11:00 am [ miles <3 ]: (1 attachment video)

11:00 am [ miles <3 ]: What do you think??

11:00 am [ miles <3 ]: Pretty cool right

11:03 am [ you ]: (1 attachment photo)

11:04 am [ you ]: LOOK AT THE FACE YOU MADE WHWN YOU JUMPEDD AHHHHH 💀

11:04 am [ you ]: this is going to be my new lock screen

11:05 am [ miles <3 ]: 😐

11:06 am [ miles <3 ]: Are you going to ignore the cool spin i did?

11:07 am [ you ]: oh sorey

11:08 am [ you ]: THAT WAS A REALLY SICK SPIN

11:09 am [ miles <3 ]: Mentirosa 😒

🕷️ Miles also sends you photos. It ranges from him swinging in midair or him relaxing on top of a building with his lunch in hand. He loves to keep you updated on his life. You’re the only one in this universe that knows his secret, so he texts or shows you everything he comes across as SpiderMan.

3:00 pm [ miles <3 ]: (1 attachment photo)

3:00 pm [ miles <3 ]: Look how pretty the view is from up here

3:00 pm [ you ]: oooh that’s actually so pretty

3:01 pm [ you ]: who knew new york could actually look nice for once?

3:02 pm [ miles <3 ]: I’m going to take you here one day for lunch

6:54 pm [ miles <3 ]: (1 attachment photo)

6:54 pm [ miles <3 ]: You should put this as your lock screen

6:55 pm [ you ]: it’s just you doing the peace sign while swinging

6:55 pm [ miles <3 ]: You said that like it’s a bad thing

6:55 pm [ miles <3 ]: It’s a nice photo :(

6:58 pm [ you ]: look i set it as my lock screen

6:58 pm [ you ]: (1 screenshot)

6:59 pm [ you ]: everyones gonna see that i know spiderman

6:59 pm [ miles <3 ]: YES GOOD

🕷️ He texts you nonsense sometimes. You could be chilling, watching something to pass the time and he will text you something so utterly stupid you would have to take a moment to process it.

10:00 am [ miles <3]: (1 attachment photo)

10:00 am [ you ]: u just sent an empty plate of food?

10:00 am [ miles <3 ]: Yeah cuz I ate 😜

10:01 am [ miles <3 ]: Like literally

10:03 am [ you ]: enough.

fanks to everyone who sent in requests IM WIRITN G THEM RN ✍️

[the-cryptographer]

i ran low motorics for my first pt of de and imbetween all my save spamming i came to a really weird place coming into the tribunal. like, i really wanted titus and as many of his friends as possible to survive, and i was looking at a near impossible hand/eye coordination skill-check. and up until that point i had been super careful to avoid having harry do drugs anywhere where kim could see him and judge him for it, but i was falling far short of the save and the obvious thing was to snort up some speed to give myself the edge, so i did. and i felt like that was in a way the truest moment of the game.

like, i’m playing an addict. i’m going through withdrawal. my hand is shaking. my hand is shaking and i need it steady. ruining my physical and metal health in the longterm don’t matter rn, bc it’s my job to run into an impossible and impossibly violent situation and save as many people as i can, and if i can’t do that, what am i here for at all? more people are going to die unless i make this shot, and i can’t if my hand is shaking, and it’s not going to stop shaking until i get my drugs, and so the only reasonable choice to make is to take the drugs, and oh- that’s why he can’t quit! beyond all the difficulties and pain and emotional trauma of the withdrawal itself, there’s no way to keep doing this job (with an abnormally large case load according to kim) and to walk into life and death situations and not botch them, while under the strain of trying to quit. and, sure, because you won’t quit you’ll have breakdowns and go on benders and give yourself brain damage and crash your car, and they’ll dress you down and publicly humiliate you for it. but no matter how much they humiliate you, they’re also not going to give you proper medical care or lessen your case load or stop throwing you in life or death situations that require you keep using, so you can’t quit.

idk, just like... it’s very strange to me bc i keep seeing people throw out the idea that it’s a moral responsibility that Harry go sober (and beyond that a moral responsibility as the player to keep him sober) but this was honestly probably the best and most thought provoking moment in the game for me, and i feel like people are really cheating themselves out of it by getting so caught up in their personal feelings about addiction that they refuse to engage it.

[huboi]

poly baby

[scara, heizou + kazu x ftm! reader]

╰┈➤ includes; mentions of periods, slightly suggestive content, reader is referred to as bbg once, mentions of smoking w**d, mentions of alcohol, mentions of s*x

╰┈➤ decided to make this cause y not? btw if it’s not clear reader is in a poly relationship with scara, kazuha and heizou

╰┈➤ this content is rated 16+ for the suggestive themes, if I see you interacting with this post and you have no age or gender in your bio you will be blocked

╰┈➤ FEM ALIGNED DNFI!!!

he’s a streamer, don’t ask why or how ik, I just know that he’s a streamer

has so many simps (as he should), they don’t give a fuck that he degrades tf outta them, they live for that shit

usually plays rpg games, sometimes plays horror games now and again

when he’s feeling generous, he will stream you and your other boyfriends cooking/baking

if u don’t want to show ur face then dw he’s making extra sure that your face is hidden from the cameras view

sometimes when he’s streaming you will randomly pop up in his room. as soon as chat sees you, they just start spamming stuff like ‘OMG ITS HIS BOYFIE’, ‘HE’S SO BBYGIRL’ etc.

scara ignores his chat obviously, and asks you y ur bothering him. 9/10 times you’re just there cause u want cuddles. sometimes ur there to give him food since he sometimes forgets to eat when he’s streaming for so long, ur his malewife what can he say?

when ur on ur period he’ll try his best to not be so angy cause he knows ur extra sensitive during this time, if he’s feeling generous he buys u sum food/chocolate etc.

want cuddles? beg/hj, he’ll tease tf outta u cause y not

scara and kazu are like ying and yang in a way, scara is pretty much the opposite of kazu. when scara is feeling up to it, he will hold kazuhas hand at random times

scara and heizou both banter 24/7, don’t worry tho usually if they get too fired up they just take it out on each other by aggressively making out. yes u have walked in on them a few times, but decided to leave them to it or just ignore them whilst u just go about ur business

scara does not give u any nicknames, he just doesn’t rlly like nicknames, he’ll just refer to u as ur name cause he prefers that, he refuses to be all mushy and lovey dovey. dw tho sometimes he does cave in to that kind of affection, but only indoors

defo not into pda, furthest he’ll do with any of u guys is hand holding, and that’s it.

one time scara ended the stream because he wanted sum loving, turns out the stream was still on, safe to say that his chat has never forgotten about it, they always find a way to bring it up. what was the loving u ask? he just wanted u to sit on his lap whilst he gives u kisses whilst calling u his pretty boy <33

heizou is like the 2nd goofiest goober (no.1 position goes to scara sorry pookie bear😭)

I feel like he’s defo a pierced, idk I just get the vibes that he pierces people for a living

he has a nose piercing, both ears pierced and nipple piercings

likes to annoy scara when he’s streaming, like he’ll just open the door and stand there like 🧍

he loves you so much, like-

one time he came home when it was pouring down, as soon as he came through the door hr just beelined straight towards you (yes, you got very wet) heizou recommended that you two could shower together (safe to say kazuha and scara heard everything)

heizou and kazuha get along very well, most likely since they’ve known each other through tomo for a while

speaking of, sometimes tomo visits the house so that he and kazuha, sometimes along with heizou, like to smoke that zaza

don’t worry, they do it responsibly

heizou is low-key lightweight, wether it be zaza or alcohol, he gets affected very quickly compared to the others

the 2nd best when it comes to comforting you on your period, he mainly is best for buying you snacks/chocolate or whatever you’re craving

so whilst kazuha comforts you, heizou races to the shop to buy as much stuff as quickly as he possibly can before you end up fist fighting scara for being a pice of shit with you knowing damn well you’re dealing with shark week

heizou loves PDA, like yes sir

he can’t keep his hands off of any of you, mainly you tho

he and scara argue a lot but it’s not like bad arguments, it’s like rlly petty ones yk?

“YOU KISSED Y/N EVEN THOUGH TODAY ONLY I CAN KISS Y/N!” “IDFC!” *aggressive make out intensifies*

heizou hogs the blanket when you guys are sleeping too 😭

like you will all just be sleeping and all of a sudden yoink

yes you have to hit him awake with the pillow cause my man can sleep through a whole ass earthquake istg

I feel like heizou is very good at make outs, sos I don’t make the rules, he does

he just gives me those vibes you know

heizou is like a puppy sometimes, like you’ll be cooking ( let him cook ) and all of a sudden you’ll get jumpscared by a shirtless in boxers heizou hugging you from behind

the amount of times he nearly gave you a fucking heart attack 📈

KAZUHA

he’s the most chill out of all 4 of you guys

he’s also high a lot, but it doesn’t affect him as much as it does with heizou and scramouche

he’s also a streamer, mainly cause scara introduced him to streaming

his fans love him, like low key yandere/hj

his fans love everything about him; his looks, his aesthetic, the fact he’s high a lot, his voice (can u blame them?)

yes, he and scara stream together sometimes

in the chat so many people gush about how cute they act at times, cause when scara isn’t being a lil’ shit he’s actually kinda nice and can be shy surprisingly

yes kazu does have piercings; ears, nose, tongue and di-

kazuha is quite affectionate but not extremely so like heizou, it’s just more casual

kazuha is extremely open to hugs and kisses whenever and wherever, so he’s ok with PDA

you want a hug in the supermarket? ok

want a kiss on the cheek on the bus? ok

want his d at home in the privacy of your room? ok

yeah kazu isn’t very kinky, he’s more vanilla, sometimes he’s kinky but rarely, only when he gets jealous ( which is truly a sight to behold )

kazu is a switch, it depends on who he’s with; if it’s with all 3 of you, switch. If only one other person is with him, he likes to top ( he’s a soft dom )

prepare for sooooo many cat videos from him, no matter what time of day at some point each and every day he will send each of you at least 5 cat videos

yes he technically has a cat but no, his friend tomo, who happens to be his ex, actually owns his cat (they got the cat when they were together so technically it’s both of theirs)

dw, tomo and kazu broke up just cause they didn’t have feelings for each other anymore like that, so they’re still very good friends

sometimes the boys get jealous and so after tomo comes around and seems a bit too close for their liking, well let’s just say you hear a lot of banging noises upstairs

are you jealous? no. mainly cause you have talked to tomo and it’s pretty obvious they’re just besties, they just sit very close together since they enjoy the closeness of each other if that makes sense

when sleeping, kazuha is strangely still, like scarily so

sometimes it seems as if he’s not even breathing so you get a big fright but he’ll suddenly let out a huge sight in his sleep, which calms you down

he’s actually a light sleeper believe it or not, he just falls asleep quite easily, he just sleeps deeply too

but the slightest of noises can just get him right up, wide awake as if he wasn’t sleeping in the first place

when it comes to dates, he usually takes whoever he’s taking with him on a nice walk in order to enjoy nature in general

he doesn’t really like fancy stuff unless if it’s an important day/anniversary eg. your birthday

he’s an amazing listener, like if you wanna talk to him about how you’re feeling, or just rant about your hyperfixations, he’ll just sit there and listen, nodding now and again to show he’s listening and not just staring off into space

scara and kazu get along fairly well, despite scaras opposite personality

sometimes he does have to put scara in his place if he’s being bratty in public or in front of guests etc. 😳

yes kazu is a brat tamer too, mainly only with scara and heizou since they can get a bit out of hand at times

if you’re a brat then…. prepare yourself

dont worry about the aftercare (wether it be a vanilla session or a tough session) he’s the best at aftercare, he will get you all the drinks and snack you need, he also helps you into the bath and helps wash up

when you’re on your period he mainly helps by soothing you with his voice but also cuddles and kisses

content belongs to @huboi on tumblr, DO NOT REPOST ON ANY SOCIAL MEDIA PLATFORMS WHATSOEVER

[littlejuicebox]

Puppy love.

Idk how this has become an almost nightly update, but I swear I have so many ideas for this little family, it's ridiculous.

Sorry for all the Dadstarion spam to the peeps that aren't into it. I promise I'm going to pivot now. I have to edit MWC and I'm aiming to get it up this weekend or early next week.

Tags/Warnings: all fluff, Dadstarion, parenting, babies, mentions of pregnancy, mentions of animal death, idk what else but comment if you see anything

Summary: Three year old Gale finds a dog in the orchard, but there’s something curious about this interaction. Astarion is struggling with parenthood in the face of his child’s growing understanding of the world.

Word count: 1800

*

Astarion had, against his own wishes, been required to participate much more in this year’s orchard harvest than in years previous. Your swollen stomach certainly got in the way of performing too much manual labor and you’d enlisted your husband’s help for the more difficult parts. 

“Darling, this is really more your thing.” Astarion sighs, crossing his arms as he assesses your pout. You’d just asked him to climb the ladder and pick apples from the taller parts of the trees.

“My love, I know you are such a wonderful father and husband that you wouldn’t dare say no to the mother of your children when she asks for help while she is currently incubating two of your precious offspring.” You respond sweetly, batting your eyelashes at your husband, “Unless you’re suggesting I should climb onto the ladder in my heavily encumbered state, dear?” 

“I hate you.” He responds with a huff and a quick roll of his eyes while trudging toward the ladder.

“No, you don’t.” You call after him before nestling yourself into the picnic blanket with Gale. The silver-haired boy was playing with a set of wooden ducks that had been whittled for him by Halsin, simply ‘quack quack quacking’ as he took a break from his part of the harvest. His little fingers were stained red by the cranberries he’d helped you pick.

Astarion reluctantly picked apples from a handful of trees before he gave up and settled down beside the two of you, insisting he would simply hire people to complete the rest of the harvest.

“I’m far too hungry to continue, love,” He complained before delving into the picnic basket and pulling out lunch.

Your stomach growls in response to the smell of food carrying in the autumn breeze. Fine, he was right, it was far too much work for two adults and a three year old.

As you eat, you watch Gale attempt more than once to bite into an oversized apple his father had picked from the orchard. The child had the item cupped in both his hands, and he kept opening his mouth far too wide, sinking only his incisors into the fruit’s thin flesh.

You stifle a giggle as he bites down and sends the McIntosh flying from his tiny fingers onto the checkered picnic blanket.

“Gale, darling, perhaps you should ask daddy to cut that,” You suggest as you finish the last few bites of Astarion’s sandwich. You’d instantly devoured your meal; the twins kept you ravenous. Your husband offered half of his own to you with a peck to your temple and gentle brush of his fingers along your rapidly growing stomach.

The elf might be exceptionally self-serving when it came to his interactions with the rest of the world, but he’d always been particularly self-sacrificing for his little love.

Gale grunts dramatically as he bends to retrieve his food and then turns to look at his father. Astarion lifts his eyes from his book to acknowledge the boy with a quirked eyebrow.

“Daddy, I want the knife for I can cut this,” he says, eagerly holding out one of his hands, hoping his father will let him use the dagger.

“I think we have a few more years before you’re using blades, little prince,” Astarion responds while snapping his book shut. Then he reaches into the picnic basket to retrieve your old sussur dagger before wiggling his fingers, beckoning for the apple.

Gale groans, disappointed that he can’t hold the knife, but obliges and hands the McIntosh to his father. A few quick cuts later and Astarion is placing the sliced wedges of fruit down in front of the silver-haired boy.

“What do you say, Gale?” You prompt as the child begins eating the fruit.

“Thank you, daddy!” The three year old responds through a mouthful of apple.

Astarion ruffles the little boy’s curls, “You’re welcome, little prince.” 

A soft whine comes from a few trees away, and Gale’s head lifts from his lunch to search for the source of the sound. His curious green eyes scan the orchard.

“A doggy!” He exclaims, immediately dropping his apple slice and moving to run toward the floppy eared mutt.

But Astarion snatches his son’s hand, halting him, “Gale, you can’t just go running after—“

“Come here, puppy!” Gale calls, ignoring his father. The dog immediately obeys, running toward the child with a wagging tail and lolling tongue.

You chuckle as Astarion wrinkles his nose in displeasure, protectively pulling his son back onto the picnic blanket and eyeing the animal suspiciously. 

“It’s just a lost puppy, Astarion.” You murmur, watching the mutt closely as it slows its approach, cocking its head slightly in curiosity. It doesn’t appear to be past adolescence.

The dog whines again, its brown eyes focused on the little boy. 

“She say she is hungry!” Gale exclaims before he crouches down to grab an apple slice, “Here, puppy!”

He attempts to toss the fruit to the dog, but doesn’t manage to get it quite far enough. The floppy eared creature slowly steps forward and takes the offering, watching your family cautiously.

Another whine comes from the puppy after it finishes the apple slice, and Gale crinkles his white eyebrows while turning to look at his father. 

“Papa, she say her mommy is hurt!” He explains, lifting a small finger to point to the back of the orchard, “Over there!”

You and Astarion exchange shocked glances. A silent conversation ensues between two pairs of eyes that know one another better than anyone else. Is the little boy actually communicating with the dog?

Astarion stands, his eyebrows furrowed, intent on confirming your suspicions. He heads in the direction your child pointed, toward the edge of your property located just more than fifty paces away.

Without his father holding him back, Gale runs to the mutt and begins to chatter excitedly, cooing praises of adoration as he pets the creature. You watch your son curiously as the animal licks the remnants of Gale’s lunch off his hands, her tail wagging happily.

When your husband returns, he’s got that same furrowed brow. Gale is distracted by the dog as Astarion calls to you, “Gwann.”

Dead.

You crinkle your eyebrows, mirroring Astarion’s puzzled expression, and then turn your focus back to your son. He must be able to communicate with the dog, there’s no other explanation.

“It looks like coyotes must have gotten to her,” Astarion explains, his voice low as he also assesses his son,  “And before you even suggest anything, no, Tav. Absolutely not. The twins are almost here, we won’t have time to—“

“Daddy!” Gale calls, running back towards his father, his new dog friend in tow, “Where her mommy go? We can help!”

Shit.

Astarion brings his fingers to anxiously pull at his own ear. 

Nine hells.

They’re adopting the damn dog, aren’t they? 

“Well, Gale…” Astarion starts, and he flicks his eyes to you, flailing his hand open in an exasperated gesture as he struggles to come up with an explanation, “Her mommy is sick and had to go to the… animal doctor. So… I told her mommy we would watch her until she got better.” 

A lie, yes. And not a particularly good one. But Astarion isn’t about to explain death to his three-year-old.

The little boy’s eyes widen in excitement as a grin spreads across his face. He turns to look at the puppy, and somehow he’s able to figure out the dog has no idea what his father said, so he repeats the gist of it to the floppy eared mutt. The dog listens and cocks its head curiously, but then seems to give some indication of agreement.

Poor little thing.

The two of you exchange glances again. You’re going to have to discuss this once Gale goes to bed.

“Come on, darling, get your toys and let’s head back inside,” You tell the little boy, “I’m sure your new friend is very hungry; we can find something for her there. Daddy is going to pick a few more apples and then join us.” 

As the three year old is grabbing his toys, you exchange another pointed glance with your husband before thrusting your chin in the direction of the dead dog. 

“Haudh,” You murmur. Grave. You want Astarion to bury the animal before the puppy winds up finding her dead mother and tells Gale. He nods his understanding and bids the two of you goodbye, waiting until you are out of sight before heading toward the back of the orchard. 

And here he thought he was done burying corpses.

*

Later that night, you and your husband are in bed after just putting your son and his new companion, Apple, to sleep. Gale had chosen the name while he helped you bathe the puppy. 

Astarion had rolled his eyes and whispered to you, “I don’t know which is worse, Scratch or Apple.”

But he’d started referring to the dog by that name, regardless. 

The elf closes his eyes and presses his fingers into the sockets with a soft groan, “I didn’t know what else to say, Tav. We couldn’t very well tell our extremely sensitive son that the pup’s mother died. You know how he would’ve responded. All the saplings in the orchard would’ve been knocked down.” 

You can’t help but laugh at your husband as he works through the events of today.

He snaps his eyes open and glares at you, raking his hands through his curls and completely ruining them in the process, “It’s not funny, dear.” 

“It kind of is, my Star,” You shrug, moving forward to press a gentle, comforting kiss to your husband’s lips, “But I love watching you try and protect Gale’s soft heart.” 

Astarion shakes his head at you with a belabored sigh, “Parenting is impossible.” 

“Perhaps… but we’ve done other impossible things, haven’t we, my love?” You whisper, and the twins roll in your stomach, signaling their assent.

Astarion sighs again and nods, bringing his hand to rest upon the swell of your abdomen. He smiles as he feels the movement of the two little ones within. 

“Sometimes I think you just manage to convince me anything is possible, little love. And I’m so foolishly enamored with you that I’ll believe anything you say.” The elf says through a lopsided, exhausted grin.  

“And apparently I’ll do anything you say, like moonlighting as a farmer and digging a damn grave for a dog,” He continues, his nose wrinkling in displeasure, “You’re lucky you’re cute, darling.” 

You chuckle; the phrase reminds you of the times before Astarion so willingly told you he loved you, back when the two of you had no idea what you were doing.

In many ways, the two of you still don’t have a clue.

But you have each other. And just like every time before, you would figure it out. Together.

[sigynpenniman]

DID YOU WAKE UP THIS MORNING TO FIND AO3 BLOCKED ON YOUR WORK OR SCHOOL WIFI?

So, something has happened overnight.

Many major companies and institutions use a tech called Cisco Umbrella to block “potentially objectionable” domains - porn, violent content, etc. Cisco Umbrella primarily works using categories, which, while changable by users, are pre-set by Cisco. So Cisco builds a list of websites which are, for example, "adult," and then makes that a category that a company can block all at once from its network. When you, as a network admin, choose to block "adult" websites in cisco umbrella, if you don't make changes to that list yourself, everything in that list is blocked on the domain.

There's another system called OpenDNS. OpenDNS allows you to block websites on your *home* network. If you have an OpenDNS account you can also participate in what's called "community tagging." community tagging allows people to tag certain websites, and I guess if you use OpenDNS you can block things with those tags...idk, I don't use it.

Here's the bit that matters: OpenDNS and Cisco Umbrella are owned by the same company. It appears that Cisco Umbrella, to some extent, uses OpenDNS community tags to sort websites.

Someone on OpenDNS has community tagged Ao3 as a "tasteless" website. Community tags can be proposed by anyone, but they have to be approved by a moderator. It seems a moderator has approved this tag. Because of the moderator approved tag, it looks like Ao3 has been bundled into *Cisco Umbrella's* blocked sites list for "adult" content. So now, any library, school, business, etc which is blocking Cisco Umbrella��s “adult” category is now blocking Ao3.

Here’s how you can help.

Go here (https://signup.opendns.com/homefree/) to create an OpenDNS account. This is free. Don’t do any of the steps to create or configure a network, JUST make an account. Be sure to uncheck any promotional checkboxes. Once your account is made, be sure to confirm your email, and the confirmation may go into spam - mind did, just be aware. Once you have an account made, go to https://login.opendns.com/ and log in with the account you've made.

It should take you here.

From here, click the small "community" button at the top.

It will bring you here. You will be likely prompted to create a display name. Pick something random, you won't need it again.

Click on “domain tagging." It will bring you here.

There's a small searchbox in the top right labeled "check a domain." enter archiveofourown.org in this field and hit go. You should be brought here.

What you want to do now is hit the "Flag for Review" button under "Tagged: Tasteless." Don't worry about the other tags. They are candidate tags, not approved/applied and aren't doing anything. The "tasteless" one that's been mod approved is the only one we're worried about. "Flag for review" will open a small text box.

Type in whatever you like here, but PLEASE be academic and respectful. Focus on how "tasteless" is an inaccurate and offensive description for the content. Hit submit.

That's it, you're done.

I do want to be clear about one thing - I am not 100% sure this is going to remove this domain from the cisco adult list, but I'm hoping. The “tasteless” tag that is present on OpenDNS was submitted in 2015. Now, it is not clear when the moderator approved this tag. They may have approved it last night, or in 2015. That date does not appear to be visible. I’m not sure what happened overnight that caused Ao3 to slip into the Cisco umbrella adult category. My best guess is that either the tag was approved last night, or Cisco suddenly started grouping the “tasteless” community tag under adult. It is interesting to me that previous tags such as pornography have been actively mod rejected, so it looks like this one being approved might have been one person with a vendetta. Either way, right now, this seems to be the root of the issue. Domains can be individually allowed on networks by network admins, so if you have to petition your school or place of work it's possible, but I think if we can fix the OpenDNS tag, we can fix it everywhere at once. Hopefully, if we can get enough flags for review in a short enough period of time, it will force them to review it.

Come, help me out here. Let's try and get Ao3 unblocked on the country's schools and libraries.

[moonstruckme]

idk if u listen to taylor swift but her song mastermind (which is kinda like maneuvering things around to get together with someone) would be so cool to read with TASM! Peter !! Maybe the reader realizes Peter is Spiderman after recognizing his voice and then tries her hardest to become Peter’s friend in school and kinda puts all the pieces together herself (+ the line ‘to assess the equation of you’ is so peter coded) also I feel like smart reader deserves more rep 😞 like no way she wouldn’t recognize his cocky ass voice

Again this is just like. Me spilling out my random thoughts 🤭 -🍁 (sorry for spam)

Hi lovely! I didn't stick to this very faithfully, but it did inspire an idea that I'd be remiss not to give you credit for! It's established relationship, where reader has figured out Peter is Spiderman (I agree she's not dumb and that needs to be regonized). Thank you <33

cw: a whiff of harassment (more of an attempt really, but if that will upset you please don't read)

tasm!Spiderman x fem!reader ♡ 1.3k words

It’s hard to feel totally vulnerable walking around the city at night when you know you’re never really by yourself. Peter thinks he’s so stealthy, but he can’t always avoid casting shadows on the street ahead of you; you were bound to catch onto his well-intentioned stalking eventually. You’re not totally sure why he doesn’t just walk you home as himself (you’re coming from his apartment, it’s not like it would have been so difficult to ask), but your boyfriend seems to prefer stepping into his alter-ego when he thinks there’s any possibility for danger. 

It turns out this time, he was right.

It’s not that you don’t see the man walking in the opposite direction of you (you’d have to be blind to miss the slow, performative up-down he gives you) or notice his mouth moving in your periphery, but you’re city-trained; you keep your eyes ahead, hoping he’ll see that you’ve got your earbuds in and leave you alone when he doesn’t get the attention he wants. 

The man passes you, and you’re thinking you’re in the clear when there’s a forceful tug on your elbow. You very nearly pitch forward in your haste to get away from the unwelcome touch, but then the hand is wrenched away, and you turn to find the man stuck to a newspaper dispenser with one wrist covered in a familiar white filmy substance. A second later, and his other hand is webbed to the car behind him. 

You pull out your earbuds just as Spiderman lands in front of you, the tilt of his head indicating that he’s looking you over for damage. 

“Hey, what the fuck!” The man sputters. “I was just trying to pay the bitch a compliment—”

“Alright, thanks for that, pal.” Spiderman webs his mouth shut, and your harasser continues his muffled protests. “Maybe we just have different styles, but most of my compliments don’t start with unsolicited commentary on a stranger’s boobs.” 

You curl your lip, and the man looks like a dog on its leash the way he’s tugging against his restraints. Your rescuer webs his feet in place, stopping their scraping against the sidewalk.

“You know,” he says, turning to you, and he’s not even trying to disguise his voice, “you should really have at least one earbud out if you’re walking by yourself at night. That’s just the first entry in the Pretty Girl Guidebook.” 

You grin at him. “I think the first entry in the Pretty Girl Guidebook would really advocate more for playing damsel in distress to lure charming heroes your way. Walk me home, handsome?” 

You start back on your way, and he follows you like it’s all he knows how to do. He’s quiet, and though you can’t see his expression behind the mask, you wonder if you’ve actually startled Spiderman into silence. If he expects you to be bashful and awestruck, he’s got another thing coming; you’re typically a bit shy around new people, but Peter isn’t new people. 

“Yeah?” he asks after a second, and you wonder if you’d be able to detect the slight pitchiness to his voice if you didn’t know it so well. “So was that the plan all along? Get yourself attacked to get yourself rescued?” 

“No.” You shrug, casting a disdainful glance back toward the man who’d grabbed you. “I don’t go out looking for trouble, but I know that if it finds me,” you say, looking up into the mask with a simpering smile, “I’ve got Brooklyn’s friendly neighborhood hero to protect me.” 

You think he actually gulps. “I’m flattered you think so highly of me, sweetheart, but you really should take some precautionary measures too.” 

“Well, I suppose I could’ve asked my boyfriend to walk home with me,” you muse, “but he seemed like he was eager to have me gone. Better things to do, apparently.”

“What?” It’s a squawk, and then Peter clears his throat from behind the mask. “I’m sure if your boyfriend’s a sensible guy—which, I mean, anyone who managed to snag a girl like you must not be totally airheaded—I’m sure he didn’t mean to rush you off.” 

“I don’t know.” You frown, looking off in front of you contemplatively. “He’s book smart for sure, but he can be kind of dense sometimes.” You can feel your companion’s hesitation like a prickle at your side, his uncertainty of how to go about this conversation with you, and it catches him offguard when you stop to look up at him with coy, wide eyes. “Do you think you’re a sensible guy?”

His voice is strangled. “Me?”

“Mhm,” you hum, slowly moving into his space. 

“I—I like to think so, sure.” 

It’s all you can do not to giggle at how easily his cocky persona has come undone. You’re having too much fun to even feel bad about the torment you’re inflicting upon your boyfriend. “Maybe I should be with you, then,” you say. 

He actually takes a step back. “But—but—uh, listen, you’re really pretty, but didn’t you say you had a boyfriend?” 

“Yeah,” you say softly, batting your eyelashes up at him, “what about him?”

You’ve got your hands on his shoulders, lips so close to his face you can feel the warmth of his breath through the mask, and you actually think he’s going to do it. He’s going to let you kiss him. You shove playfully at his chest, unable to contain your laughter anymore.

“Pete, c’mon,” you say, careful to keep your voice low. “You must think I’m an idiot. You really thought I wouldn’t recognize you?”  

There’s a few moments of wordless sputtering which you can’t really hold against him, and then Peter’s whisking you into an alley, pulling his mask off. 

“Sorry for fucking with you,” you say while he’s still getting his bearings. He runs a hand through his hair, eyes wide. “It was just so easy to flirt back. You made it too much fun for me.” 

“Jesus, babe.” Peter fists a hand in his hair, already fluffy from being handled so much. “When did you figure it out?” 

“I mean, before today, but not very long ago,” you admit. “I knew something was up for a lot longer, but I didn’t put it together until you helped me with that mugger a few weeks ago.” You quirk a playful eyebrow. “You should at least try to distort your voice if you’re going to be Spiderman around people who know you in real life, you know.” 

“Never had to with Flash,” he mutters. “Why didn’t you say anything to me?”

You turn a bit more sheepish, unsure if you should feel guiltier about keeping your realization from him. To be fair, though, he’d kept a whole crime-fighting secret identity from you. “Is there ever a right time?” you ask him with a little shrug. “I guess I eventually wanted you to tell me on your own. I get why you didn’t, but it’s not like you’re exactly choosing to trust me here.” 

“I do,” Peter says immediately. He takes your shoulder in hand, like he needs to keep you steady to make sure you’re hearing him. “I do trust you, honey. It was never about trust.” He passes a hand over his face, shock melding into something more like dread. “It just, it could be dangerous for you, if you’re ever seen with me and it's obvious you know who I am, or something. I didn’t want to drag you into anything. There are…not everyone thinks of me as the friendly neighborhood hero you do.” 

He gives you a little smile, and you return it, stroking his jaw in an attempt at comfort. “I know,” you say softly. 

“We’re going to have to be careful.” 

“I know. Pete?” 

“Yeah?”

“If we’re being careful, you should probably put your mask back on.” 

[s4toryuu]

inumaki headcanons — 1

notes: bc im losing it and i love toge too much.. also numbered for future masterlist because there will be multiple hcs!! —also not x reader bc not everyones into that but truuust next hc will be x reader

part 2

he mostly communicates through notes app and signing but since it’s annoying to pull up every time he just resorts to body language and signaling to things

he knows that he can probably say a lot of words but he’s too scared ever since some kind of incident in his childhood

he can definitely say other nouns but when he says people’s names, that person automatically anticipates a command or smth so he just refrains from saying anyones name

despite him being a troll, there’s definitely a side to him that wishes people took him more seriously

he can type like 150wpm due to it being his only straight way of communication LMAO

texts with chronically online slang

absolute menace outside of assignments and school (see: maki’s skirt incident)

kind of likes that his onigiri language can piss people off

can’t lose arguments

really fcking funny on tw1tter and on his ig spam

like he’s actually hilarious and probably has a couple thousand followers

he doesn’t tweet a lot or post a lot but when he does it’s stupidly funny and genius wit

his hair looks a little like back it did when he was a first year when he wakes up in the morning

I feel like he’d like hot chocolate idk he just looks cozy all the time and I associate it with hot choco

his body temp runs on the warmer side

he’s a twice fan idc I don’t make the rules

has never once used his cursed speech for malice

at least not for anything serious

like he definitely got free candy or something when he was little from a candy store, “give me free candy” idk

he’s one of those “sigh.. this generation” people who say that whenever they’re out and everyone’s on their phones

but actually it’s just cuz he likes spending time with his friends so he wants everyone to be present

he just mutters “okakaaa” with a sigh and dramatically rolls his eyes while him and the second years wait for their food in mcdonalds

maki’s like “what now” and he points to their phones and mocks how they’re sitting like capital Cs

more soon!

— reqs [open]

[hanniluvi]

💭 — GYUVIN AS YOUR BOYFRIEND !

☆⋆｡ — what it’s like having gyuvin as your boyfriend !

⋆｡‧★ PAIRING bf!gyuvin x gn!reader GENRE fluff

⋆｡‧★ WARNINGS none?

☆⋆｡ — NOTE : tysm for requesting anon !! hope you enjoy !

— we all know gyuvin will be a chaotic ass partner 😭 like this man will be all over you and just bothering you..he’d randomly just touch your face or even tackle you 😢

— you could memorize his moves and get away before he could do anything … yet that never goes successfully because he always has a way !

— as if i didn’t make it obvious already, gyuvin’s love languages are physical touch and quality time 🙏 idk, it seems the most suiting for him.

— you: poking him constantly, covering his screen, messing with his hair, etc and then there’s gyuvin like: “do you want to play too?” like bros a multitasker, he could let you be in his lap while he is pressing his keyboard aggressively LMFAO

— despite your bf being the gamer he is, he’d let you bother him during his games (the partner privilege) 😭 like you’re surprised he doesn’t get annoyed and is able to pay attention to his screen.

— dates would be arcade dates, day/night walks (w/ eumppappa LMAO), movie nights, and js cuddle dates

— loves matching bracelets, necklaces, rings, or anything you give him TBH !! like he would bring it everywhere no matter what. like don’t be surprised if he’s wearing a handmade bracelet you made like months ago that you FORGOT yourself 😭 he’s just so sweet okay

— silly goofy close up pics together?? yes!!! i also feel like he would squish ur face and just take a bunch of pics … like WAY too much 😕 but he thinks its funny cute so 😢

— playful arguing with him EVERYDAY 😭 like you guys just both automatically talk in a loud voice that people think u guys are fr fighting but you guys are actually not !!

— super comfortable with you so he’s not embarrassed of anything he does really … like he could do ten back flips in a row and suddenly break dance after and you wouldn’t bat an eye…yeah he’s that comfortable 😊

— would get upset if you aren’t taking care of yourself properly 😭 so like expect daily check ins, and him just spamming you just so you can do what u have to do daily !!

— laughs at everything you do ngl 😭 like he’s the type to roll on the floor while letting out the most loudest laugh ever .. hes so silly but we love him for that

— he’s so down bad for you it’s actually insane. like heart eyes for you every second every minute every hour every day 🤗 did i feed into your deluluness bc ik im fed

💭 — gyuvin is a cutie frfr

PERM ZB1 TAGLIST (OPEN) — @dwcljh @ilovewonyo @jiawji @tzyuki @kpoprhia @flamiricky @misokei @lluvjjun @zzzhoonie

[philsmeatylegss]

notnsure why I got blocked bro lol but I just want to say please make people a bit more aware of the fact that you're a Dan and Phil blog bc I followed you for several years without knowing and now that I do know and have to unfollow it's a bit sad idk maybe put that in your pinned post or pfp

I feel like I’m in the fucking twighlight zone😭 My url is PHILSmeatylegs. My profile picture is of Dan. My bio mentions dan and phil. My pinned post mentions dan and phil. I constantly post about them, especially when videos released. I hit a post limit a week ago from spamming 300 posts about Dan’s liveshow. Idk how much clearer I could be😭😭 I genuinely am unsure if someone is playing a prank on me😭

And yes! You are blocked. Because you sent me a private message saying you must unfollow me for committing the cardinal sin of not personally delivering a letter with the content of my person tumblr blog with a whopping 1.4k followers called fucking PHILsmeatylegs

Im like 90% sure this is a joke because I know I’m pretty socially inept, but I don’t think I’m this bad😭