#idk if anyone understands how desperate i am to post fic

[fortjester]

in other news, my joey claire fic is now 4.2k words long, whoot whoot

[thepersonperson]

Ngl your post summarises so well why i love sukugo and why im so insane about them

Like of fucking course those two would work together when Sukuna deeply does not care about any social rules to ever exist. Of course they do when Gojo is confronted with someone gay for him and not hiding behind anything. This is not survivable and i love them and care them. I even had written in the notes for my fic about Gojo being the person who generally prefers to keep things as they are but i couldnt actually formulate why i think that. You are so smart your analysis is so wonderful

This is also why I like Sukugo a lot. It's not just that Sukuna matches Gojo's freak, he enables it. Encourages it even. Makes it worse. Sukuna's existence is a twisted opposition to Jujutsu Society. It's very hedonistic, sadistic, and selfish but by golly it is rebellion.

The flattery is also appreciated, but please understand that I am very stupid and am capable of making mistakes. Alternate perspectives like yours are just as valuable. Which is why I'm shoehorning your tags on this post into this ask. (They are great tags and everyone should see them. Also I don't know how to respond to them otherwise.)

#yeah youre right # sorry i got time to think about it #and im kind of writing gojo rhe same but a vit more influenced by sukuna lmao #tbh as the person coming from a post soviet country #i honestly cant like #fully agree with everything due to just #like i understand that what people want from socialism isnt what was in soviet union #but its still very much hard to accept that anyone could want what we went through lol #when i tell you that socialism actually pitted everyone against each other isnt not a joke #but i understand what you lead into and yeah yeah true

#tbf to gojo he really tried even if his method ultimately failed #like he had genuinely tried to do better for the kids that came after him despite the desperate lack of empathy of understanding of others #and himself #like i can appreciate the desperate desire to make change for the better

#and yeah geto was so horribly jealous its insane #of anything really #i also kinda really think geto has the mentality that after toji gojo is different? #that the boy he knew died and this is someone else #and what he does it ultimately for the boy he loved and for the boy who survived through changing #it also may be a bit of a fucked up coping mechanism how to deal with it all and differentiate what gojo was to him and is

#but yeah i was thinkinf about it and talking a lot #they were so badly exploited as children #we know its better with gojo than it was before #but then also if gojo takes on the hardest missions for the students that means he’s not present to teach its a fucked up circle #he doesnt understand enough to be a full leader to make a rebellion but he is trying god damn #but yeah the only way he could articulate what he’s actually feeling is through battle which is sad

#i take the way he stopped looking for exciting battles growing up is him growing up #like sending yuuta for cursed tools. he made his peace that he cant just chase men while he needs to take care of the kids #idk its all deeplt fucked up and im very sad for them

That's a fair criticism and even better commentary. I understand the aversion to some of the words I'm using to describe this. It's just that I don't know how else to effectively communicate what I think is the main issue. I do appreciate you're willing to hear me out on this though! (You're applying Umineko's "Without love, it cannot be seen." which makes me very happy.)

I'm US based which is a hypercapitalist hellscape, so when I talk about socialism it doesn't mean "do exactly what the Soviet Union did" (that would be very bad) but instead some of the ideas behind workers rights are good and desperately needed to curb stomp the type of labor exploitation they're experiencing. (Like unions for better pay, hours, and working conditions.)

Theory is useful because it give you the words to describe exactly what's wrong and the ideas that can guide you towards productive solutions. I can say Jujutsu Society is bad because of labor exploitation from the higher ups and therefore unions would help mitigate their power because I learned about those things.

Gojo and Geto don't have those words or background so they see part of the problem but have no name for it. And because they don't understand why it's happening, their solutions are surface-level treatments that don't address the real source of their suffering.

Toji was a symptom of the problem. Geto saw Toji as the entire problem so he thinks eradicating anything like Toji is the solution. Gojo saw Toji as a symptom and a potential solution to the real problem—Jujutsu Society. He recognized that Toji being strong is what helped him escape this problem so he laser focused on it. If he and his students are strong, they can change things. What things exactly? Gojo doesn't have the knowledge or time to dwell deeper on it. To him strength=revolution. He neglects the need for mutual aid, addressing overwork, and limiting child labor because the words and framework to deal with that are missing.

Gojo can't really do anything other than keep things the sameish because he doesn't know how the better world he's seeking works. (Similar to how you recognized this flaw of his, but couldn't put it into words since you didn't have them.) He both does things better for his students and screws them up in whole new different ways as a result of this. It's very tragic.

And everything wrong with Jujutsu Society is still just a microcosm of Japanese work culture that leads to this exploitation in the first place. Nanami is the only character that makes this connection and he has no idea what to do about it other than work where he feels less bad about it.

It's kind of like knowing a grease fire is dangerous but not knowing how to put it out.

>Gojo throws water on the grease fire trying to put it out and makes it worse before he starts suffocating it with his body instead of a blanket.

>Geto tries to eradicate grease from existence not knowing that other types of fire exist.

>Nanami realizes oxygen and fuel are the source of fires but he has none of the tools to put them out or prevent them.

>Sukuna understands that letting the fire burn everything to ash means there will never be fire again. ...While ignoring this also means there will be nothing left in the aftermath.

If any of these people were taught fire safety (labor theory), their methods of dealing with the fire (labor exploitation) and preventing it in the future would be so much better.

Japan has some of the lowest union memberships and the worst working conditions amongst rich countries. JJK has a lot to say on the topic so I'm being very annoying about it because I don't see others talking about it this way.

[orchideous-nox]

what are some problematic opinions you have??

I really don't think any of my opinions are problematic? Idk, I guess I'll let the people be the judge of that. I want to preface that these are how I feel personally and I would never try to enforce my opinions on others. Ship who you want to ship, love who you want to love. If you disagree with any of my opinions then that's fine but please don't try and convince me to "see your reasoning", these are opinions I'm pretty set on.

I don't particularly multiship, not because I have no sense of fun but because I genuinely can't understand how people ship Barty with Sirius or Narcissa with Lily or Evan with James etc. It makes so sense and no amount of reasoning will ever convince me that anybody other than Evan can stand Barty to a degree that they want to fuck him. He's so annoying and I mean that with all the love in the world as an Evan kin. I think Sirius needs Remus to mellow him out. Lily and Narcissa is just a no from me. Period.

I think sometimes the fandom forgets that relationships can be platonic. Friends exist, not every character needs to fuck all of their best friends because they understand each other so deeply. Yes, they have great chemistry...as friends. Platonically. Do you want to fuck your best friend? .......actually you're on tumblr and a marauders fan so who knows

People are so desperate in this fandom for others to talk about the girls more but then when people do post about them there is like no interaction. From experience, the boys get more hits, more kudos, more notes etc. I write about Rosekiller expecting not much attention, I'm not in it to get popular otherwise I would stick to Jegulus and Wolfstar rather than my precious murder husbands. But whenever I post about the girls the comments are dryyyyy and it's not fun. I love getting comments and replies so I can interact with others and talk about headcanons. It feels like as soon as I post about the girls people forget that they were encouraging more of that content in the first place.

Fanon and canon are blurring and not in a fun way. There are certain headcanons that people take from fanon or even from specific popular fics and start stretching canon to fit the fanon and then get angry when people don't stick to it. Saying a character is canonically a certain way because of implications in the canon can be really harmful.

I don't particularly care for OCs in fics. I read these stories for the characters I like and if an OC has like a massive chunk of a chapter on their own or even whole chapters or whole fics I will likely skip or even DNF because that's just not what I'm here for. Like I don't care.

If a character isn't attractive in this fandom, people don't care. Just because someone doesn't have rippling abs and perfect skin, it doesn't mean you can write them off as being bad. People can be hot and fat, ugly and fat, ugly and skinny, ugly and a good or interesting person!!! As a plus size person, I have spent my whole life looking at media portrayals saying that I am not worth attention until I am skinny, only then can I be attractive, and this fandom can be just as guilty sometimes (I'm looking at you people who make Snape hot to justify liking him, and making Peter have no personality besides being fat).

People are way to eager to interact with content they don't like to tell them they don't like it. Look up what an algorithm is, hun, I'm begging you. (this isn't controversial unless you are one of those people who does that)

Okay, hopefully I've not lost anyone along the way. Like I said, don't try and convince me I'm "wrong" in the comments, these are opinions and cannot be factually incorrect < 3

[theragethatisdesire]

fic-d here, please, i desperately need the smut abc for plug eren because i am OBSESSED with him.

and i also need to know exactly what kind of clothes he wears, for … unrelated reasons.

hiiiii mooty moot <3 can i just say i'm thrilled you asked this. fair warning for anyone about to open below the cut, this is going to be an absolute MONSTER of a post. and i'm going to love every second of writing it lol.

okay first, the outfits. plug!eren is very like, stoner/streetwear type. LOVES layers, lots of hoodies and flannels and jackets, always wearing Vans, really favors a graphic t-shirt (thrasher, anime tees, has a really impressive collection of vintage band t-shirts and limited-edition supreme drops) i shall attach some reference photos:

idk if this is even the right vibe, but just very casual, whatever-works type of clothes. owns like, two button downs vs his 1001 sweatshirts lol.

and now...onto the nasty stuff LOL enjoy lovebug

PLUG!EREN nsfw headcanons under the cut <3

A. Aftercare

plug!eren is 25, yes, but he's also kind of just a boy at heart lol. it takes him awhile to understand the whole concept of aftercare and just laying and spending time together after sex because he bounces back fast, and is already jumping up to cook dinner or get both of you ready to go to a kickback or something like, two minutes after. once you explain the concept to him, he develops a complex for awhile that he "hasn't been treating you well", and goes really overboard LOL but eventually it evens out. becomes a big fan of snuggling afterwards but would never admit it.

B. Body part

eren was a thin kid growing up, and he's super proud of all the work he's put in to change his body over the years. especially proud of his back, it's his favorite muscle group to work and the one he tracks the progress of the most for sure.

on you, plug!eren is an asssss man. like, he's the king of ass men. constantly running up behind you to land a light smack, grabbing it, holds it while you're cuddling etc. also loves your hips? like, he loves when you ride him specifically so that he can hold on tight and grab at the fat around your hips. i cannot overstate how much he loves it.

C. Cum

plug!eren def has a face-painting thing. he loves to cum in you, and it takes him a few hook-ups to tentatively throw out there that he'd love to cum on your face, but after you let him do it the once, it's over. wants to cum on your pretty face and take pictures of you all covered in him every time you fuck.

D. Dirty secret

being an engineering/architect student, eren's not bad with a pencil and paper. loves to sketch the human body as much as he loves thinking up random building designs. not going to elaborate much here bc spoilers....

E. Experience

LMAO plug!eren is absolutely ran through, so yes, he knows what he's doing.

F. Favorite position

for eren, it's a toss-up between doggy or letting you ride him, both of which stem from his thing for your hips and your ass. i think he would say riding him solely because you usually cum harder that way and eren loves watching you cum, but if it's winning out over doggy, it's only by like, an infinitesimal amount.

G. Goofy

it takes him awhile, but once eren's comfortable, he can be such a goofball during the act. like, will giggle with you when you bump your head on the headboard, full-blown belly laughing when he tries to shove you up against the wall and knocks a few picture frames down. once, one of the legs under his bed broke and you both laughed so hard about it that you couldn't even finish the act. absolutely had a photoshoot of both of you pulling ridiculous poses right beside the now-broken bed.

H. Hair

eren's not like, full-blown bush or anything, but i don't see him doing much more than just trimming. he's terrified of nicking his balls or something if he fully shaves LOL.

on you, eren would never tell you what to do with your body (again, ran through enough to know that's a big no-no when it comes to women), but i think he secretly loves when you're completely bare because he's really into watching how you take him. it gives him an unobstructed view, whether he's eating you out, fingering you, or fucking you, he loves to be able to see every bit of you.

I. Intimacy

plug!eren struggles with being intimate, and while he craves it, he hides it under constant rough sex. after you've been together for awhile though, you have a huge, blowout, nearly-break-up fight, and when he fucks you that night, he's slow and sweet and definitely not tearing up, whispering little i love yous into your skin while he rolls his hips against you. making love is definitely in him, it just takes him awhile to get up to that point.

J. Jack off

24/7. no question. this man's sex drive is unbelievable and honestly? sometimes you're too sore or just not in the mood, really. my favorite thing about plug!eren is that when you just can't go another round, he'll have you sit up all pretty and naked for him and just jack off staring at you, making you talk to him and tell you how good he made you feel. lovesick little baby.

K. Kinks

huge pleasure dom. "can't cum again" is not in eren's vocabulary- he knows you can and he knows he can make you, so what's the harm in one more? not sure if this counts as a kink, but eren's obsessed with the way you smell. not just like, your arousal, but your perfume, that little scent that everyone has that just smells like them really gets him going. every time he stays at your house he can't keep his hands off of you, loves to steal little things like a pair of panties or a dirty shirt just to have at his place for when he misses you. could get down with a daddy kink if you were into it. i struggle to think of the word for this, but he's just nasty. his favorite kind of sex is freaky, nasty, flat-out disgusting sex with cum everywhere and the sheets ruined. big marking kink, loves to leave bruises and hickeys all over you as well.

L. Location

plug!eren is very possessive, what's his is his, so not really into the public sex thing, but will take you absolutely anywhere he knows no one could catch you and get a glimpse of what's just for him. really into sex in the kitchen for some reason?? shower sex too, god that is his favorite, just having you soaking wet and pinned up against the shower wall. up against a wall in general, actually. again, he's worked really hard to get all these muscles, and it definitely gets him off how easily he can just scoop you up and fuck you in his arms. might be an ego thing but hey, who are you to complain?

M. Motivation

anything that reminds him you're his. like, if he catches a glimpse of his hickeys on your neck under your makeup? you're going home from dinner early. you're walking around in one of his tshirts? he's bending you over the counter and you're not taking that shirt off for a second. eren's also a very detail-oriented person, so if he tells you he really likes red lipstick for example, and you wear it the next day, he knows it's for him and for some reason the thought of you choosing something to wear that you know will turn him on makes him feral. you're his pretty little thing, and he loves when you show off a little for him. LOVES lingerie. like, the complicated, full-set bells and whistles of garter sets and stockings and the whole thing. embarrassed at first because he can't figure out how to take any of it off of you, but when you just smile at him shyly and pull your panties to the side, he debates leaving you there to go buy an engagement ring LOL.

N. No

surprisingly, anal. eren's very well-endowed and a girl he was seeing for awhile talked him into anal, and even though they prepared well, she was still in too much pain to really enjoy it and it scarred him a little bit. he likes to hurt you within reason, but that's crossing a line for him, so no more than a finger or two and even then, only if you really want it.

O. Oral

LOVES GIVING HEAD. like, could die happy between your legs, it's his favorite part of sex type of loves giving head. has to beg you for it, but his favorite is when you ride his face. also loves receiving. really big into pulling out when he's getting close and having you finish him with your mouth. also loves eating you out after he's cum in you, then spitting both of your cum into your mouth. again, he's a nasty nasty man and i love him.

P. Pace

eren fucks fast and hard, especially once you've gotten used to his size. he has to ease you into it at first, he's not a total asshole, but once you've gotten adjusted, it's all gas no brakes with him. all those hours in the gym really pay off when he can have you bent over for what feels like an endless amount of time, crying and wailing under him.

Q. Quickie

weirdly, LOVES a quickie. totally gets off watching you limp off to work/class after he bent you over the bathroom counter in the middle of you doing your makeup just to make your legs a little extra-shaky for the day. you're both busy, what can he say? absolutely pulls your panties up with his cum in you and tells you to keep it in there for him.

R. Risk

eren's down for whatever you're down for. he's already fleshed out most of his kinks and fantasies at this point, other than a few things he really needs a committed partner for. it really turns him on when you take the initiative to shyly ask if you can try something, and when you come over one day tentatively holding out a pair of handcuffs? oh he's done for. the one thing he doesn't love is being submissive. he'll let you have your fun, choke him a little, ride him, etc., but he really isn't into being a full-on sub and being made to beg. i think that would be his other really hard no, come to think of it.

S. Stamina

eren is, again, ran through, so he's got some stamina. usually can last at least half an hour, sometimes he can even put himself off longer. he loves to try to go multiple rounds, but honestly, he wears himself out LOL. that doesn't mean you're off the hook though. eren might not be able to get it up, but he's got a mouth and some talented fingers and he loves to make you cum over and over just for his own entertainment.

T. Toys

toys are friends, not enemies! eren specifically loves your vibrator, it's small and easy to use in multiple different positions. his absolute favorite is to have you on top of him, fully seated and grinding against his hips, while he holds your vib to your clit. no chance of him getting enough friction to bust early, and he can make you cum at least two or three times like that until you're in tears and begging him to actually fuck you. yeah, that's his fav.

U. Unfair

eren's not so much of an intentional tease (bc he will accidentally work himself up too much and have to leave the bar early lol), but he's just so unintentionally pretty he doesn't have to try. i mean come on, he's beautiful and he's naturally so charismatic and flirty that he can tease without trying. and when you both get home and you're all riled up and pulling his clothes off, it's so entertaining to him. he loves when you tell him how pretty he is, how he got you all turned on just doing nothing but being himself.

V. Volume

plug!eren is a big dirty talker, but he's actually pretty vocal on top of that, too. loves to moan and groan and tell you exactly how good you feel, whether that's with a noise or his words. he's the loudest when you give him head, it just feels so good and he can't help but ramble on and on about how good you are to him. his "tell" that he's about to cum is when he starts rambling, words slurring together and it just seems like he can't shut up.

W. Wild card

eren loves when you're a little drunk, lowest of keys. not so drunk he's taking advantage of you, but when you let the responsible, professor mask slip and just really let yourself go and have fun, it drives him crazy. he loves seeing you happy, and in an honestly almost-perverted way, he loves seeing you go absolutely crazy with your friends. it just makes him so hard to see you uninhibited and dancing in the middle of the club like you own the place, all eyes on you.

X. X-ray

i think this was pretty well covered in the fic but.....yeah it's big. like, a solid eight inches, girthy, veiny, pornstar dick. eren's blessed and he knows it and uses it to his advantage. your favorite game together is to see how much of him you can get down your throat and eren's obnoxiously cheering you on like a coach. "you're almost halfway babe, have you been practicing on bananas or something?" "shut up eren! i'm trying to concentrate!"

Y. Yearning

okay i feel like it's basically canon that eren's ready to go at all times, no matter what, and plug!eren is not exempt from that. on top of this, though, he's really turned on by...idk, mundane things? like when you stretch with your arms over your head and he can see the outline of your breasts through your shirt, the curve of your neck, when you stick a pen through the bun on top of your head. like, the silliest things turn him on, only adding to his super high sex drive.

Z. Zzzz

eren's usually still bouncing off the walls right after, loves pillow talking and staying up late and discussing any topic he can think of under the sun. he's very restless as a person, so it takes him awhile to go to sleep, especially plug!eren. you usually fall asleep first. always has to go rip the bong a few times or he's just got 0 chance of knocking out, but he always sleeps better when you're snuggled up to him <3

[sinner-as-saint]

idk what’s been happening lately but i miss the era of bucky barnes stories where he’s the actual character. not a biker, step dad, fuck boy, etc. don’t get me wrong!!! i love your stories but i feel like all of the BB fandom on this app has disconnected from his character :(

//

^^^^^No I agree with this anon so much. They're all great and were all written by very talented writers on here. But these past few months,I've been trying to find Winter Soldier Bucky fics,basically canon Bucky,where reader had an encounter with Bucky as Winter Soldier in the past and now she meets him again as Bucky. It can be dark or non dark,reader can be an avenger,agent or just normal civilian,just anything because I'm so desperate for a fic like that and Google and Tumblr search didn't work for me. And so far,I only found 2 fics like that (which I'm so grateful for both fics being series with multiple chapters. Made the search worth it. I would hug the writers if I could). And that too,not on Tumblr but on AO3,in the James "Bucky" Barnes/Reader tag that had 705 pages which I then also had to filter out with 'Winter Soldier Bucky Barnes' tag and the pages came down to 25. I stopped at page 13 and that's how I found those 2 specific fics that I'm looking for. I haven't scrolled through all the pages yet so maybe there's more of what I'm looking for. And maybe not all writers are using the 'Winter Soldier Bucky Barnes' tag even if they're writing canon Bucky so that means there's more. But yeah,I was confused as Winter Soldier & Bucky recovering from being the Winter Soldier is is Bucky's main lore and yet I filtered it out,705 pages dropped to 25.

Like,I'm not complaining at all. And I'm so sorry if it came off like that. I'm not even a writer so I don't want to complain. I know how hard writers work while juggling work and personal life at the same time. I actually read every new Bucky fics posted here no matter how they're written. And I'm happy that many people still remember and love Bucky in 2024,so much that they would still write fics about him. Without the Bucky fics posted here daily by bunch of great & talented writers,my daily life would be dull & boring. But the anon ask above reminds me of the time recently when I simply trying to find Winter Soldier Bucky fics and found just a few of them and I was just thinking to myself "Damn....... Where did all the Winter Soldier/Avengers Bucky fics gone to?". Anyway,I sincerely apologize for my yapping.

I understand what you mean, anon. I have said whatever I had to say in the previous ask and unfortunately, I have nothing else or new to add

I will say though, if you can't find the fics you're looking for that might be a sign that maybe you should start writing! That's how I started out, I never thought I'd be a fanfic writer one day but here I am.

Also if anyone has any recs for the kind of fic that anon is looking for, please leave them in the comments below

[whump-and-suffering]

a confession?

OK so most of my recent sickfic/snz fantasies are about This One Guy who I doubt anyone else on here likes, and aspects of his character and the canon might be offputting to some people, but I'm going to take the risk and post about him and see if I can convert anyone who isn't too squicked.

Mention of canon incest below cut.

so yeah it's R/ff R/ff RH//PS.

I'm incapable of finding a bald guy sexually attractive (I say this but I know someone who used to say they liked him but found him completely unhot, and now they've been trying to convince me that he's hot after all, so it might only be a matter of time...I blame this person for getting me interested in the character AT ALL btw) but I still want snzfic of him. There's like one old one on the forum but it's incomplete and ancient and...well I'm going to have to do it myself. I know there's one fic on here for Frank and don't get me wrong that's hot but...sadly my fav is NOT the hot one in this fandom.

But at least hear me out here. He is smol and skinny and looks so ILL throughout the film. I know people see the like sunken eyes etc as sinister but I'm sorry (/not sorry) he just looks sick to me. Like he hasn't had a full meal or decent night's sleep in far too long. Which considering how Frank treats him is probably accurate.

(Speaking of which, he has lots of non-snz whump potential as well considering he gets whipped and kicked onscreen. But I'm less desperate for that content since it already exists, there's some very whumpy fic for him.)

He's an alien so I don't know if he even can catch human illnesses but even if he can't, maybe there's a Tr/nsylv/n/an illness with the same symptoms? I mean his immune system's gotta be shot at this point right. Look fuck the worldbuilding there's a grand total of 3 people in the world who bother with worldbuilding for this fandom and I am not one of them. I just want him to be even more miserable and for his long pointy nose to be all red and sniffly. His voice is so raspy already imagine how he'd sound. And he clearly doesn't own a shirt and is walking around on a cold wet night in November wearing a torn up, unfastened coat and nothing but a very thin torn and backless waistcoat under it. Half his chest is bare.

At the same time I totally understand if his canon relationship with M/genta squicks people out too much. It would completely put me off the characters if they were human but I think I've just kind of gone, they're aliens and it's normal for Tr/nsylv/n/ans so it doesn't bother me that much. My fics wouldn't be sexually explicit, I don't do that anyway, but like...I'm not going to pretend it's not a thing either, but I will TW for it... and just hope there's at least a few people in the community who don't run a mile from it and that no-one makes a callout post for me or something.

Anyway this feels like r/offmychest or something. At the same time I guess if there's any community to not be embarrassed about having weird taste in, it's this one? idk

[amtrak12]

I'm going to do this ask meme that no one asked me for because I printed and filed about 100 CAD drawings today in the physical office building!!! so you can't stop me :P (Also we used to do this all the time back on LiveJournal without anyone asking first. It's called INFLICTING MY FAVORITES ONTO MY FRIENDS LIST 😆 and I'm bringing it back!)

Lucifer Ask Meme

Favorite Male Character:

🚨Error 404🚨 favorite not found -- but I suppose Lucifer by default??? Although, I have a big ol' soft spot for Amenadiel too. I named my second Chromecast after him 🥰 lol

Favorite Female Character:

EVE who should've been in far more episodes than she was. 😡 Who do I sue for that?

Least Favorite Character:

We're going main cast only here, because villains were never in the running. I'm gonna say.... Dan -- BUT I DON'T HATE HIM like I did during my initial watch! It's important to me that you know that! In fact, by this point, I genuinely love him.... I just love him the least out of everyone lol

(Although, if you go by who I want to explore in fic the least, I'd probably say Ella. Because I will happily write Dan/Dan related fic any day of the week. He has too much juicy stuff to explore in each of his relationships with Chloe, Trixie, and Charlotte.) (... yes, I know I haven't written any fic for him yet. But I would!!!)

Prettiest Character:

EVE! My answer is always Eve

My bb 🥰🥰🥰 ignore my unskilled photoshopping pls

Funniest Character:

Trixie 😂 Or do I have to pick an adult character? Because then I'll say Charlotte Richards because Tricia Helfer being a snarky asshole is always hilarious. Also she's prettier than Lucifer and I won't apologize for saying it 😜

Favorite Season:

SEASON TWO! The one where Chloe and Lucifer fell in love 😍😍😍 Unless you put season 4 in front of my face, in which case my favorite is season 4 because EVE (and also the God tier -- pun intended -- soap drama in the S4 plots. It's good shit XD)

(No I'm 100% serious, Chloe nearly poisoned Lucifer with the aim to perma-ban him to Hell!!! I don't understand why everyone is so mad about it still???? That's a true romance story to me. 😍 The epitome of the Third Act's Darkest Hour if I ever saw one LOLOLOL)

Favorite Episode:

2.13 A Good Day to Die -- that Unsteady scored montage tho!!!!! *swoons* (Yes, I put a YouTube link to watch it. No, I don't care if you've never seen the show before. It's good shit!!!!!) (probably not as good out of context, but again DON'T CARE! 🥰)

Favorite Romantic Ship:

Deckerstar (Lucifer/Chloe). Obviously, yes, Maze/Eve are prettier

Like even their (entirely unedited bc I'm lazy) silhouettes are prettier. I UNDERSTAND THE FACTS, YOU GUYS! However, Lucifer/Chloe are messier, and as a fic writer, I'm going to give the edge to messy. 👍

Favorite Family Ship:

Trixie with her parents (Chloe and Dan) T_T LOOK! The parent/child relationships are a big reason this show managed to sink its hooks into me. (Well... that and the S3 finale wing scene 👀 oops)

(Bonus category, my LEAST favorite family ship: God with each and every one of his children ROTFL 😆 Terrible father. Maybe an okay god idk! But a garbage father. 👎)

Favorite Friendship:

Maze & Linda! (But Maze & Chloe desperately needed to be explored more in later seasons. It's so RUDE how the writers basically dropped them after Maze moved out. Also there's a TOOOOOON of untapped potential in a Chloe-Eve friendship, I'm just saying 👀👀👀)

Worst Ship:

CHLOE/CAIN! 🤮🤮🤮 Obviously they post-date the term by a lot, but this is exactly the kind of ship the word 'squick' was coined for *shudders*

And because I can't leave this on such an icky note....

Funniest Unspoken Joke in the Entire Show:

Charlotte wearing a shirt with Chloe's face on it while Dan gives her the big 'all in' relationship speech. NO ONE POINTS IT OUT IN ANY WAY! But I am fucking dying. 🤣🤣🤣 It's impossible to convey why this is so funny to those of you who haven't seen the show, but here's a Powerpoint slide to try. (click to enlarge, alt text available)

@ Whoever wrote/staged this scene: I'm kissing you on the mouth. 12/10 no notes. 🤣👍👍

[mirimage]

Aha I am not doing great rn long post ahead

I feel like ‘not great’ is an understatement lmao. Idk where even to begin.

I’m so exhausted all the time and unbelievably burnt out, but I can’t do anything about it because I have to keep going to work. And even if I could take a break or quit, would it even fix the problem? At this point I don’t know what it would take to feel okay again. I keep not being able to force myself to go to work and idk how much longer I’m gonna be able to keep a job before they fire me or I have to quit myself.

I’ve been trying to find a medication that actually does something for like two years now. I’m on the 6th combination and none of them have done a thing. At some point I’m gonna run out of stuff to try, and then what am I supposed to do? I’ve been basically banking my entire future on finding something that’ll make me be able to function.

My food issues are acting up because of the new house, my friends’ food choices do not blend well with me as well as them wanting to stick to a strict budget (which also annoys me because I’m the one earning the least in the house, why are they worrying about it.) I just end up not eating/eating very little instead of something they’ve made half the time, and eating way too many snacks.

I’m not sleeping enough because if I go to sleep it’ll be the next day and I’ll probably have to go to work, and night is the only time I can just relax and do my own stuff without worrying about anything else. I keep not showering for days in end because it’s just too much effort and makes me anxious, keep forgetting to do household stuff for the same reason and I feel like it’s only so long until my friends get sick of me.

I’ve been realising that I don’t really have many friends in the first place. I’ve barely talked to the person who I would have called my best friend for like months. She cancelled on an event we had planned for over a year the month before, as well as the past 2-3 times we’ve tried to meet up. I’d still consider her a friend, but to be honest we haven’t been best friends for at least a year. My partner is now my ex partner, we’ve talked once since we broke up and it ended extremely badly. He left our friends group chat today, he said he wanted to stay friends but I don’t know if that’s gonna happen. I have my housemates I guess, but even though I love them we really aren’t the same kind of people and I feel like they don’t understand anything about my life and who I am. We don’t really share any interests so I can’t talk to them about stuff I like.

Because of all that i feel so goddamn attention starved and just like desperate any kind of interaction. I’m a very clingy person but I don’t really know how to express it, which was fine when I had a partner to focus it all on but now there’s no one and all I want is to curl up with someone and take a nap. I just want a hug. I feel like this is being enhanced by my current fandom having fics that are literally exactly what I want. I like reading them because they’re so good but it fucking hurts because I know I’ll likely never get it.

I feel like I’m more myself online these days than in person. I don’t know if anyone in my offline life that actually knows who I am anymore. I just want someone to understand.

If you actually read this far then thanks I guess, I’ll be okay I promise.

[thespacebetweenworlds]

ABO is just feminist propaganda

[performativezippers]

I really hope you did not bail on continuing the dandelion Inn. That would break my heart a little. As long as I know you will continue/finish it eventually I can wait (very impatiently but still..).

Okay so typically I don't respond to things like this, but ignoring the last few I've gotten here and on twitter obviously hasn't worked, so here we go.

Yeah, don't do this.

You're trying to be funny, but this is a not-at-all-veiled "NEXT CHAPTER WHEN, WRITE MORE." And just...no.

You—and by "you" I mean the group of y'all that send comments like this to me and others, not this anon specifically because I don't know you—obviously mean for this to inspire me to write faster, but what this actually does is piss me off and make me work on something else. Why? Because it's not kind, it treats me like a production machine instead of a person, and it, frankly, makes you seem like an ungrateful asshole. Sorry! But true.

I find that people who write these comments typically—and I literally don't know who you are so idk in this situation—aren't the ones leaving long, detailed, enthusiastic comments on every chapter on every reread. Not the ones earnestly and consistently reblogging and retweeting and writing thoughtful commentary or even excited tags. You come off as an unengaged and ungrateful reader who will leave kudos but nothing else, and two days after I post will be saying "when is the next oneeeee" which is so frustrating.

I spend hours on these chapters. Literal hours of my life. If you want the next one so badly (and to be clear, I'm glad that you do), write me a long ass comment or ask about what you loved in the last chapter and what you're excited to see in the next. That motivates the shit out of me. That makes me happy and excited to write what's next.

This morning I woke up early with the intention of going into the office and working on Dandelion until my first meeting. But instead, I'm writing this. We all lose, basically. I am way less interested in writing it this morning than I was 30 minutes ago. And that sucks! I love writing, I love writing this fic, and I love being engaged with y'all. You just need to treat me like a person and understand that this "write faster, gimme" bs does not work. I don't know anyone this works for, so honestly, just stop it.

Next time you're desperate for another chapter of one of your favorite fics, try this: "Hey, I just reread [x fic] for the [6th] time because I'm obsessed!! My favorite part of this chapter is when [character] said [quote from fic]. I couldn't stop [laughing and my grandma thought I was dying]. Last night I couldn't sleep thinking about what will happen when [character] finds out [secret]. I'm not sure if she's going to [reaction A] or [reaction B] but mostly I just want them to KISS [IN THE RAIN]!!! I love you forever and ever, byeeeee"

And just in case this hasn't landed, here's another way to put it. If you are not in the following situation, I literally do not want to hear your thoughts on how quickly I write. If you're doing all of this, I welcome your feedback on my pace of fic output:

Drafting an original novel

Revising an original novel that is honestly your very best hope of being published and that is about to be sent to publishers

Watching as your second novel, Firefly, one of your loves, slowly dies in the hands of publishers, meaning that your agent, who you have worked with for over 2 years now, has still not made a single fucking penny off of you, and might drop you as a client

Celebrating your wife's birthday and generally spending time with her because you love her and value your relationship with her

Working on a long fic with a partner that you really care about and have a deadline for

Working a day job that is so intense and stressful you literally spent 5 hours the other weekend (on your writing day) ensuring that a student didn't do something to themself. Sorry I couldn't work on Dandelion that day, I need to make sure this person did not die.

Having a chronic, persistent, and ultimately probably terminal disease that makes you so exhausted sometimes you can't lift your head up after a work day

*insert gif I can't find of Lucy saying thanks for playing!*

Like I said, I hate doing this, I hate writing this, I hate responding to this, but ignoring hasn't worked, so here we are. Please don't make me say it again.

[ben-wisehart]

1/? Thank you so much for your detailed and fast meta-response! You’re truly amazing and gave me more answers than I expected. The thing I’m getting at is, MXTX presumably writes her ships the way that they’re supposed to be the one and only for each other. She even makes them stay virgins till they can be with their partners. And while I absolutely do believe in making soulmates I also believe that there are people who are much more compatible than others.

Following on from this. More Bingqiu ramblings under the cut

2/? Hualian and Wangxian are very compatible personality-wise and their whole relationship isn’t based only on acts of kindness. Or take Mo Ran. CWN reminds him of a past kindness and his mother so he chooses him as his Shizun. That choice is Mo Ran’s. One part why he likes him is that he’s reminded of a kind home but the other is that he genuinely likes and appreciates his personality. You won’t get this with other people or Shizuns he migh have otherwise chosen.

3/? The same goes for Wangxian and Hualian—they see their partner and appreciate what they see. You say that LWJ might fall in love with another troublemaker but that’s some personal characteristics he might find attractive personally but in comparison LBH seems just like a blind man desperately reaching for any kindness from a father figure. That’s what I don’t like about this ship. And it hurts me because I actually like it so much. Yeah, maybe I am a hopeless romantic but look

4/? Wangxian got infatuated with eo because of their personal qualities, remained by eo’s side because of their choices and stayed together because of their compatibility and appreciation for eo. Same goes for Ranwan. With Bingqiu if you think about it, LBH only saw hero worship, which turned into desperate yearning for love from said father figure but you could literally replace SQQ with whomever else no matter what personality or how (in)compatible & I guess that’s why I find this frustrating.

5/? I genuinely think that you couldn’t just replace one partner from other aforementioned ships and they’d just another partner the same way. From SQQ’s part the choice to stay by LBH’s side is because he genuinely sees who LBH is but LBH doesn’t see him, not because of identity reveal but because he just needs someone-anyone to cling onto and I find that sad, mainly for SQQ. It’s something like a puppy

7/? 7/? You take it home and give it shelter and it loves you unconditionally and would love anyone else who’d do the same for it. And I think that in any relationship the most important part is that: "I see you and I appreciate you," which Bingqiu one-sidedly lacks.

8/END Sorry about my terribly long rant and thank you for letting me air my grievances in your askbox. Idk if you’re on twitter as well but ever since my friend introduced me to your meta and fics I come and check out if you’ve posted something new from time to time as I don’t have an account here. So thanks for being awesome!

9/REAL END I forgot to say thank you for your reddit meta links, I'll look forward to checking them out 😊!

Lmao anon you’re killing me, I read these asks at like half past midnight when I was unable to sleep from a caffeine high, spent the next half hour thinking about it and then finally took out my laptop again to start writing a reply at 1am

Okay, so. I don’t know that there’s gonna be some...singular thing I can point out that will make you suddenly like Bingqiu as much as the other ships you’ve mentioned? We all have our preferences and that’s fine. But I also don’t think that’s what you’re asking me to do anyway, so I’m just gonna reply with my thoughts.

I think I understand where you’re coming from a bit better now, and I do understand how MXTX writes relationships in the “one true love” sense. To be honest, I think she probably wouldn’t agree with me saying that her other MLs could just as easily have fallen in love with other people, but ultimately, I disagree with the notion that there is one person out there who is the “right” person for us to be with. I don’t want to rehash any point I’ve already made, so I’ll leave it at that. I don’t think you’re wrong, however, in saying that of course some people can be more suited for us than others.

I think the reason Bingqiu suffers more from this perception you’ve mentioned, that SQQ could be interchangeable with another person without really changing Binghe’s dynamic on his end, is probably due to a couple of factors. Firstly, even though all three MXTX pairings meet when at least one of them is a child, Binghe is unique in that he was both a child and was practically raised by SQQ during his formative years. (The whole parental dynamic and age gap is something for another essay I don’t feel like writing, so I’ll just leave it at that.) Binghe is kind of fucked up due to his trauma and has pretty much built his entire identity around loving Shen Qingqiu. Everything he does in this novel, he does because of him in one way or another. We can argue about the fact that it’s unhealthy but it is what it is.

Secondly, Scum Villain is a shorter novel. It’s also MXTX’s first novel, and it’s largely a parody of danmei, transmigration and stallion novels. MDZS, TGCF and 2HA have a lot of conflict in them that isn’t directly related to the main couple, whereas in Scum Villain, almost all the conflict is specifically about SQQ and LBH in some way. It has fewer chapters and the characters have less room to breathe and develop, I think. Thirdly, but also following on from this, SQQ and LBH have an outside force meddling with their relationship at every turn. SQQ isn’t perfect by any means, but I maintain that he is at his core a good person who just wants a comfortable life for himself and Binghe. However, due to factors outside his control, he’s literally being held at a proverbial gunpoint to act a certain way. Even with the OOC lock disabled, he can’t be his truest, authentic self when his survival is contingent on pleasing the System. Of course he works around it when he can, but like, when he reunites with Binghe after the Abyss, he’s literally presented with a multiple choice question on how he should answer Binghe’s question about regrets! He holds onto Binghe’s jade token for years not because he’s a sociopath that likes withholding a precious possession, but because he knows it might literally save his life if he saves it for the right moment. He’s at the mercy of the System and could get killed or tortured at any moment.

So all of this is to say that Luo Binghe doesn’t really seem to have much of a personality outside of loving Shen Qingqiu, and Shen Qingqiu has an incredibly hard time letting his personality shine through the limitations that are placed on him. Stuff for them to work out post-canon, etc. etc. etc.

But even so…it’s not like they have no personality. To use my own example that you mentioned in your ask, why is Wei Wuxian being a troublemaker a personality trait that his husband can be attracted to, but Shen Qingqiu being kind isn’t? I kind of glossed over the fact that you called kindness interchangeable in my first reply, but I strongly disagree with that sentiment. There are a million ways to be kind. Luo Binghe loves Shen Qingqiu in a way that was unfortunately influenced by his trauma and the way the System interfered in their lives, but the things he loves about him are his own. Two people can be kind, but it’s not a universal human trait. Shen Qingqiu is kind, and he’s also intelligent and bashful and a bit ridiculous. And Luo Binghe knows all of this. He is twenty-five at the end of the novel; he’s got some pretty messed up ideas about ideal relationships, but I still think we need to give him more credit than assuming he’s not capable of recognising that SQQ is a complex person with multiple personality traits. It might have started out as hero worship, but he gets to see plenty of SQQ’s true self throughout the novel even in spite of all the limitations imposed by the System. If Shen Jiu had shared all these traits, Luo Binghe might have loved him instead, but you could say that about any character in any relationship at all. If a different reader had transmigrated in SY’s place, I’m not convinced that they would have made the same choices Shen Yuan did. There are plenty of readers that would have been perfectly kind to Binghe but wouldn’t have thought to give him a new cultivation manual so he could improve his cultivation techniques in time for the Endless Abyss. There are plenty of readers that would have been perfectly kind to Binghe, but knowing he would be fine wouldn’t have thrown themselves in front of poison for him or taken a hit for him in the dream world. SQQ readily admits that doing things like this was unnecessary, but SQQ is the sort of person that when you give him a split second to make a decision, he’ll put Binghe’s safety first. Always. Even knowing that Binghe was never in any real danger. These are not the actions of a person who is only motivated by their own survival, no matter what SQQ tries to tell the audience. That’s kindness, and it’s a rare quality that shouldn’t be discounted on the basis that if someone else had done it the same way, it would have had the same effect on Binghe’s affections. You could say that about any personality trait under the sun. Maybe Binghe would have loved someone else just as badly if they’d done all this for him, but we’ll never know, because they didn’t, and Shen Qingqiu is the one Binghe loves. He has no interest in changing that. The puppy doesn’t care about all the other possibilities, and neither does the one who took it in. Their relationship is no less special for it.

Okay I’ve already fucked up my sleep schedule for the entire weekend so I’m gonna call it here. I am on twitter though! My handle is bobby_speeds. Thanks again for your questions!!

[firelxdykatara]

You’re doing a LoK rewrite, correct? Would be really interested in hearing how you plan on fixing Suyin’s character and the Lin-Suyin conflict because……. oh boy. Man there’s a lot to unpack there. This is what happens when we don’t let Toph just raise her fucking kids for the sake of pushing a stupid as hell narrative about working women and single motherhood.

I am indeed!

In... you know, the way I'm doing most of my big potential projects, in that I have a folder with some documents that have plot notes and... some day I may actually get full, finished fics out of them (h2o AU is in there, as is my voltron!atla fusion AU, and uhhhh my book 3 atla rewrite, and a few other things), so... but I will say that the docs I have for my LoK rewrite so far amount to roughly 4.2k words of just Plot and Character Notes, which may some day turn into words of Story, hopefully.

ANYWAY, POINT IS: yes, this exists, and I have Many Many Thoughts.

Including how the Gaang kids would shake out! Cause I know I'm doing Zutara, and maybe Tokka???? Although I don't wanna just leave Suki out either... maybe a throuple??? Or Sukka having an amicable breakup before Sokka and Toph get together--maybe she already has Lin by then, and Sokka helps support her through the grief of losing Kanto???? Idk honestly, I haven't actually figured any of that out definitively yet except that Aang was perfectly happy to settle down with an Air Acolyte from one of the rebuilt temples because he grew up and out of his crush on Katara pretty easily once he hit puberty and matured a bit.

UHHH none of which is actually an answer to your question, because it's a valid one! Which is why I've been sitting on this a while (10 days I'm so sorry) bc I haven't made any solid decisions but I've been letting it percolate around my head a bit. And the more I think about it, the more I really like the Sukka -> Tokka idea (and I don't want to kill off Suki since the kids all deserve their awesome Kyoshi warrior auntie in their lives, and also I want a Sukka kid to be besties with Iara [zuko and katara's youngest] so maybe she gets with someone else after she and Sokka split? I could be talked into Ty Lee/Suki actually, the more I think about it....), but obviously having a stable father figure and a Toph who is... not what LoK made her out to be will dramatically change the Beifong family dynamic.

That said, I think I actually have a solution. (I'm so sorry for what I'm about to do.) Toph has Lin with Kanto--and he passes away when Lin is two or three, which is why she has very few memories of her father. (Although none of this 'she doesn't even know his name until she's 50+ cause Toph didn't tell her daughters about their fathers' bullshit.) Sokka is there for her through it all (all of the gaang is, of course, but you know that it sometimes just hits different when it's someone you're also starting to fall in love with, especially when there are older and much more deeply buried feelings there that are now resurfacing, because at least in my version Toph was deeply in love with Sokka when they were teenagers, but he was in love with Suki and she also loved Suki so she didn't want to mess up anything about their family or the group dynamics by making her feelings anyone else's problem), they fall in love, get married and have Suyin.

(Sokka may jokingly refer to it as a shotgun wedding, but the truth is he wanted to propose well before he found out she was pregnant, his attempts just kept getting messed up in increasingly comedic fashion.)

Throughout all of this, Republic City has been established, Sokka is Chancellor, Toph is something of a defacto police chief--mostly because, at the time, no one else was willing to volunteer, and she jokingly offered to whip the law enforcement, but unfortunately everyone else at the meeting took her seriously. However, she is also the founder of the probending league, and basically her feelings about law enforcement are complicated and she actively discouraged her kids from joining the force which is part of why Lin did. How else do you have a teen rebel phase with a parent like Toph? (Which, in this instance, means tough and firm but fair, with a 'you break it, it's up to you to fix it' attitude and very little desire to actually control her daughters and their behavior.)

Ah, but here's the rub.

Suyin is ten years old when Sokka dies, and Lin is sixteen. I'm not sure how he's killed--maybe by Yakone, to tie it into my plans for Amon and book 1. (Note that I'm not sure when the Yakone bloodbending trial happened in canon, but it doesn't matter. The timeline I'm gonna build will be completely different post-comet, and I'll eventually write it all down so that I can keep things straight.) Which would incidentally provide excellent means of having Katara have a very personal stake in the Amon conflict, and perhaps color the fight between him and Iara, but I'm getting off track. And I think Sokka being killed by Yakone, and Toph being unable to protect or save him, or deliver her own brand of justice to avenge him (because Aang is there to stop her and.... shit probably got ugly, I suspect she didn't talk to Aang for at least twenty years after Sokka's death--and this isn't to say I think Toph is particularly violent or murderous, but in that moment, she absolutely wanted to kill the man with her bare hands, and however much she may have regretted it afterwards, she took a very long time to forgive Aang for stopping her in the first place), is what results in Toph stepping down as police chief.

She didn't withdraw from her daughters or fuck off into the swamp or anything (words cannot express how much I hate that part of her canon history), but she did grieve for a very long time. Lin, meanwhile, felt like it was up to her to keep her family together, while also feeling a desperate need to... prove herself, I think. And because her mother was so adamant that she not join the police force, that's exactly what she does. I think Lin completely misread Toph's intentions, too, and believed that the discouragement was because her mother didn't think she had what it takes, when in reality I think Toph was scared of Lin losing herself in the job like she herself had begun to, and eventually coming up on something she couldn't change or fix and making the same mistakes she had.

(I think Toph and Lin have communication issues largely because they are both headstrong and willful, but where Toph thought she was giving her daughters the room they would need to make their own way, what Lin desperately craved was direction and she felt like that was something her mother simply couldn't understand.)

Suyin, on the other hand, fell in with a bad crowd like in canon. I think that what she desperately needed was attention, similar to Lin craving direction, and Toph was trying so hard not to be her own parents that she went a little too far in the other direction and Suyin began to feel like it didn't matter what she did, her mom wouldn't care, or get angry, or discipline her, or anything. Lin and Suyin butted heads a lot growing up, too, especially after Sokka's death, because Lin tried to rein in her sister's behavior and this was met with resistance and derision because Suyin felt like Lin was trying to be both mom and dad and she was neither but her big sister would never admit to being just as lost as she was and it made her furious.

So when Suyin is sixteen, and Lin is twenty-two and new to the force, The Big Rift happens. Lin catches Suyin and her gang, tries to apprehend her, gets a scar on her face in the ensuing conflict. But instead of abusing her power and sending her problem child off to her mother before fucking off to the swamp to avoid the consequences of her actions, Toph tries to actually fix things. Suyin cools her heels in prison for a while, because she was paralyzed by guilt at the time when she hurt her sister (a few inches lower and she could have slit her throat), and was still there when Lin's backup arrived.

Uhhhhhhhhhhh..... I'm so sorry I rambled for so long, BUT THE UPSHOT IS: I think Suyin learned a bit about culpability and taking responsibility for her own actions, Toph realized that her daughters had different needs than she did at their age (and I think a lot of the problem was that grief clouded her own ability to connect with her daughters, and in trying to not be her own parents she lost sight of how to be the parent her own daughters needed), and Lin, I think, had to realize that she had never fully processed the loss of not one but two fathers and had turned to her job in order to avoid actually confronting the grief that had overshadowed her childhood.

However, she did not forgive Suyin, at least not right away--and she wasn't forced or expected to. Suyin understood that she crossed a serious line, she took her lumps and did her time, and no one shamed Lin for her anger. I think, as a result, she had less reason to hold onto that bitterness, and perhaps by the time the story actually begins, she and Suyin are on much better terms, though I haven't worked it out exactly yet.

UHHH yeah I went on for days lmao. All of this is subject to change, too, depending on the needs of the story whenever I get around to actually writing it all down, BUT these are my initial thoughts, at least.

[septiembrre]

I'm a little late but I just saw your post from a year ago about latinx rep in good girls and its sad reflecting back on it and how the show could've done better. Rio was just another stereotype, I hate how he was ambitiously latino and there was just no connection to his culture. Was he first, 2nd, or 3rd Gen? If he was 1st Gen it didn't make sense to have the family speak English. One thing that always annoyed me is how OOC he was at times and how the writers purposely made him out to be like some brown aggressive misogynistic man. They didn't bother making him complex. In a way I'm glad the show got canceled. As a Mexican woman the way Rio was written was racist.

Wah, I’ve been sitting on answering your ask. I wanted to tease your ask apart and respond to it sentence by sentence. But... my brain kept rechazandolo, so now I have feelings dump instead.

Since Good Girls ended, I have been parsing through how I feel about S4 and GG overall — sometimes more positively, sometimes more negatively. Then, I flip to reminding myself it’s not that serious (it's just tv! this is supposed to be my leisure activity!). Then, I waffle back to reflecting.

So, no textual analysis just feels and whining under the cut. I know folks are still mourning the end of the show and I don't want to yuck anyone's yum. Tagging with #ggnegativity.

My short answer is that Good Girls is my beloved, sometimes joyful, sometimes hurtful, complicated little show. Even now that we’re no longer getting new episodes I’m wary of sifting through the information we have about Rio because it’s a mess and it seems like a lot of his character was poorly thought out (ahem, all those dumb messages from Bill Krebs confirming multiple instances of lack of intentionality or care!).

I say this because I was tempted to start responding to you by riffing off of your comment with, “y'know, now that you say that, I think he’s third or fourth gen…”, pero who cares? And the point was never specifically about what gen he is, or even more specifically about... lol, I was going to say it doesn't matter what nationality he was, they just needed to pick one. Ugh, but the wording of that is too glib. The lack of intentionality behind these details feels sanitized to me, it feels very white gaze, it feels lazy.

However, I could have forgiven a lot of this weak character construction if his baseline, plot-related characterization on-screen was more consistent. But, Rio was often used as a plot device in a way that often fell flat for me, a weekly recurring bogeyman whether his antagonism made sense or not. On one hand, I feel for the creative team, because I think they were in a hard place, trying to avoid romanticizing Rio, and trying to seemingly backtrack the sexualization of him in Season 2, but... Idk, it's complicated.

Retrospectively, it’s sitting with me how much Good Girls is rooted in whiteness. While it's something I discerned before (lol, most obviously with 2x13 and in S3 with Lucy's disposability), you know how some shows get to their third or fourth season and finally start investing in their marginalized characters? It’s a crappy thing to hold out hope for, they're crumbs! But, I was. And we did get some Rio worldbuilding. But, ultimately, it felt weak to me -- under-conceptualized or under-worked.

For example, I liked Nick as a Bigger Bad who drove Rio and Beth together. I also thought that Nick's non-existent moral code was a lovely foil to Rio's, and that this contrast humanized Rio in a way that he needed. It also cast a new light on Rio's behavior of the earlier seasons, outside of Beth's perception in a way that I thought was healthy and needed. Great, meaty stuff! However, Nick and Rio's relationship came across as shallow to me. There really did not seem to be a lived-in quality to their scenes. The show really struggled with that element overall -- even with the three lead protagonists (their decades-long history with each other and interactions between their families being largely absent). I wonder why they made that choice.

It's strange because on the flip side we got a hefty amount of contextualization for MLM guy Vance and Annie's bf Kevin... Even that cop who Mick killed! All white men, too.

Me da pena.

Or maybe the thing that bothers me is that those scenes between Nick and Rio didn't center Rio's perspective effectively? Despite the one-on-one scenes being outside of Beth's framing (Rio being a secondary character typically tethered to Beth's story arc), there still was a lot of distance between Rio and the viewer? Like I think of Vance in his kitchen with his wife and child, and the way we as viewers were brought into that to empathize with him, and I think of the distance of Nick+Rio boxing scene or the scenes at the bar. Argh! It's hard to pinpoint without the textual analysis I feel too grumpy to do. It was such a narrative choice to keep Rio aloof and I side-eye it.

Anyway --

Overall, the writing room/show creators/decision-makers didn't seem to consider Latine/x/a/o viewers throughout the crafting of Good Girls and that sucks. It really feels like I'm being told to conform to the white gaze in watching the show, and after 2x13 that makes me feel prickly and defensive. A part of me yearns to do a rewatch to map Rio’s character (and inconsistencies) but I still yield joy from Good Girls — it’s been my main comfort story during the pandemic. I also rendered joy from Season 4 specifically — some of those scenes between the leads at the end were phenom!!

I am leaning into what's bringing me joy right now, so I feel hesitant to stew in critique, even while I also feel some sort of need to make sense of the hurtful racializations. I have a compulsion to write them all down on the same post or list -- somewhere where I can see them all at once and understand. But, at the moment, it’s not a use of my time and energy that feels good. Opting into fics and writing is bringing me a lot of joy during hard times.

I have to close with one final whine, that I am SO fatigued with television options right now. I find myself desperately wishing for more TV out there whose priority audience isn't only white folks. Good Girls isn't alone in its treatment of Latinx characters, or alone in mishandling characters of color or gay characters, or prioritization of empathy for white het male characters, but certainly, creating something more thoughtful shouldn't be so hard.

[adenei]

What Hurts The Most

Hi all! So this is a continuation of the drabble I wrote the other day with the prompt: “I would’ve done anything for you.” The beginning is the same, but I’ve expanded it as a competition piece. I’m not saying it ends any happier, but I’m definitely inspired to make a mini-series of it.

I know, I know...I’ve already written a Post War Australia fic before (or maybe two? Or more? idk, I’ve lost count..), but I can’t seem to get the direction I want this to go out of my head. 

******************************

Ron couldn’t find Hermione anywhere. The last of the guests had left the funeral, and all Ron wanted was some quiet alone time with her after the stress and grief of the day. The last place he could think of checking was his room, and he hoped she was waiting for him there.

When he opened the door he was disappointed to find the small space empty, and he ran his fingers through his hair from the resulting frustration. Ron walked over to his bed, resigning himself to sit and think of any other place she might be as he tried to quell the panic rising through his body. That was when he saw the letter perched on his pillow.

Her neat handwriting donned the envelope with his name. Ron felt his heart drop into the pit of his stomach as he reached for the letter, his hands tearing it open of their own accord. He scanned the page hurriedly, hoping the words he was processing couldn’t possibly be true.

Ron,

Please don’t worry about me. I’m fine. I need to find my parents. I know you’re hurting and grieving for Fred, and your family needs you, so I couldn’t ask you to come with me. It’s not that I didn’t want you to come. I’m trying to keep your best interests at heart. You’ve just been reunited with your family, and I couldn’t possibly tear you away from that. But it’s time I found mine, too. 

I promise I’ll write to you. I’ll keep in touch so that you know I’m safe, and as long as you’ll have me, I’ll visit the Burrow as soon as I’ve returned from Australia. Hopefully, this won’t take long. Please don’t think I wanted to leave you. Especially not with things the way they are.

I’m sorry. I hope you can forgive me.

Hermione

His hands were shaking. She just left? How had he not realized that she’d been planning to retrieve her parents right under his nose? It wasn’t safe for her to go alone. His parents would have understood if he’d joined her. Ron shook his head in anger. He wanted to go with her, but she hadn’t even given him the choice.

“I would’ve done anything for you.”

He crumpled up the parchment and tossed it in the bin as angry tears stung his eyes. There had to be something he could do. Anything. But what? She was probably halfway around the world by now.

The door opened, and for a split second Ron thought that maybe it was all a cruel joke. That Hermione would be the one to come waltzing through the door to check on him. His hopes were mistaken, though, as it was Harry who entered.

“Did you find her?” Harry asked hopefully.

It took everything in Ron’s power to look up at his best friend.

“She’s gone.”

“What do you mean she’s gone?” Harry shut the door behind him and crossed his arms, waiting for Ron to go on.

“What do you think I mean?” Ron spat. “She took off for Australia without telling anyone! Without telling me!” The anger caused his voice to rise to a dangerous level.

His hands were shaking uncontrollably as he reached up to pull at his hair. The grief was already making him emotionally unstable, but this was enough to push him over the edge.  Hermione’s departure had sucked away what little happiness he had left. Hermione—and their budding relationship—was the one bright spot in his life as he navigated the loss of his brother. Now that she was gone, an emptiness washed over him. The pain of feeling alone began to consume him when Harry’s voice drew him out of his tailspin.

“What are you going to do about it?” There was no sympathy in Harry’s voice.

He looked up at his best friend, meeting his stare. “What?”

“You heard me. What are you going to do about it?”

“What can I do? She’s already gone, and she clearly doesn’t want me with her.”

“Is that what your gut is telling you?”

Ron gawked at Harry. “What’s my gut got to do with anything?”

“It’s a saying, isn’t it? Trust in your gut.”

“What’s your gut telling you?” Ron grumbled. 

He bloody well knew the saying. What he didn’t understand was why it mattered right now. Ron would have preferred that Harry just spoke plainly and not in riddles. He was starting to sound more like Dumbledore by the day.

“My gut? My gut’s saying that my best friend is a right prat who’s going to wallow in self-pity instead of going after the love of his life!” Harry threw his hands up in the air exasperatedly.

“I—what? That’s not—you don’t...” Ron spluttered incoherently.

“Please, mate, I know you two think I’m thick sometimes, but I’ve watched you dance around each other for seven years. And I bore witness to your kiss in the Room of Requirement in the middle of a battle! Don’t tell me that doesn’t mean anything. Stop letting your stupid pride get in the way and go after her!”

Ron couldn’t believe his ears. For once, Harry was making sense, and as much as he wanted to ignore his best friend’s suggestion, he knew deep down that Harry was right. Trust your gut. Right now Ron’s gut was screaming ‘don’t let her go.’

“But how am I supposed to find her?” he asked desperately.

“How’d you find us when you came back to the hunt?” Harry was eyeing the deluminator that was lying on his nightstand.

Right. The deluminator. He had a point. A good point. But would the deluminator work, or would he have to wait for her to say his name again?

“What if it—”

“You won’t know unless you try. Now, pack a bag and let’s find out.”

Ron fought through the millions of thoughts creating a haze in his mind as he grabbed his rucksack off the desk chair and began shoving things randomly into the bag. He’d done a lot of mental things in his life, but this just might be the barmiest. If the ball of light miraculously appeared, could it actually take him all the way to Australia? He shook that particular thought from his mind. Let’s not get ahead of ourselves, here.

As wary as Ron was about going after her, he couldn’t bear the thought of Hermione finding her parents alone. She needed his support just as much as he needed hers, even if she didn’t want to admit it.

Once his rucksack was full—and hopefully of belongings he actually needed—Ron crossed the tiny attic bedroom and picked up the cold metal object. The object that Dumbledore left for him. The deluminator came through for him once before, and Ron hoped beyond measure that it would come through for him again.

“Are you ready?” Harry sounded as though he was anticipating this more than Ron.

His thumb reached for the clicker, but before he could bring himself to pull down on the lever, he paused. “What if it doesn’t work?”

“You won’t know until you try, mate.”

Ron shot Harry a disbelieving look. “You sure you don’t want to come?”

“No. She needs you. You both need each other. It’s about time I stop getting in the way of that.”

Ron stared at Harry in awe for a moment before becoming suspicious. “You’re not just saying that so you can spend alone time with Ginny, are you?”

Harry smiled sheepishly. “Not entirely. But I meant every word I said.”

Without thinking, Ron wrapped Harry in a bear hug. The two didn’t embrace like that often, but after everything they’d gone through, it felt warranted.

“Thanks, mate.”

Ron let go and backed away, eyeing the deluminator nervously. “Well, it‘s now or never, isn’t it?”

Harry nodded, and Ron flicked the lever before he could talk himself out of it. He was expecting the little ball of light to float out and hover over him, Hermione’s voice speaking his name in her just like last time, but nothing happened.

“No,” Harry said disbelievingly. “I thought it would work.”

Ron collapsed on the bed, his rucksack landing on the wooden floor with a decisive thud. 

“Now what do I do?” He asked desperately. 

Harry didn’t answer right away as he mimicked Ron’s actions, flopping on his camp bed. Eventually, he sat back up, breaking the silence with a creak of the mattress springs and his voice.

“We wait, and we listen. She’s bound to say your name eventually, right?”

“Yeah, right.” Ron’s voice sounded hollow. 

If there was one thing Hermione Granger was good at, it was not speaking when she didn’t want to. The hope Ron let in just moments before was plummeting as he felt the woman he loved slipping right through his fingers.

*********************

So, dare I ask? Do you want more? 

[circlique]

Do you have any ships you like but ever only in a very specific way? That’s the kind of relationship I have with rusame. Cold War dark and edgy antics with hate fucking? nah, lame, overdone 🙄😤🤮 Two people who are really just himbos making fun of each other for petty reasons and shit 🥺😍🥰

God I love RusAme himbos like that like what was the post I reblogged a couple days ago...Russia stealing America’s model airplanes and claiming them for Russia. That’s some good shit.

Anyway, to answer your questions: (tw for r*pe and abuse mentions btw)

Russia/China: I am SO fucking picky about rochu like--it was a notp for me for the longest time because I despised how everyone made it super abusive to China by making Russia this obsessed stalker who China would somehow fall in love with. Like, I have found fics where Russia r*ped China and after he apologized China would fall in love with him. God fucking no. And also, even when consensual, any time where Russia is a fucking hypersexual “seme” to a mewling, begging, hyper feminine China. People who ship it like this, get wrecked. SO anyway, loving and supportive rochu where China is a snarky asshole and Russia falls for him because China’s the only one who stands up to him and treats him like an equal and a comrade. They become each other’s rock in a rapidly changing world, and although they have their ups and downs, they understand each others suspicion, pain, and hesitance better than anyone. 

Japan/China: I feel like it should be fairly obvious why the history surrounding this ship makes some people uncomfortable. Obviously people acting like the r*pe of nanjing was some kind of shipping scene is fucking disgusting. However, I have met many Chinese fans who like this ship. It’s kind of a “better world” sort of ship, where many of the people who ship it do so with the understanding that the two of them coming to terms with their pasts is about the only way it can happen. That being said, I think there is plenty of canon evidence that China wishes to have a better relationship with Japan, and that he feels a lot of nostalgia for when their relationship was better. I think a lot of fans of this ship just want to see them have a happy ending.

DenNor: A very popular ship that seems to have a couple of common shipping trends that rub me the wrong way. Number 1: really obvious seme/uke dynamics. I’ve seen several people say Norway is really “in touch with his feminine side” and idk if maybe I missed something in canon but I never got that sense from him at all? Not to say having a feminine side is a bad thing, but this ship does get the seme/uke treatment a lot, and kind of like rochu, people will make Norway super desperate for Denmark’s dick and then also make Denmark into this manly sex god. And then number 2: making it abusive. Norway pulled on Denmark’s tie in one scene. Now he’s gotta hit him every time he’s sort of annoying I guess and verbally abuse him. Can’t we just have the cute dynamic where you have one who’s basically a golden retriever and the other who’s a cat? That’s DenNor to me.

GerIta: You remember what I just said about people making Norway verbally abuse Denmark? Well, GerIta but with Germany verbally abusing Italy all the time. Canon is to blame for a lot of this because...like half their interactions are Germany yelling at him. But they were at war, Germany was frustrated with his ally being a dunderhead--but why do we have to go and make their romantic relationship the same way, especially  modern day? Wouldn’t part of them getting together be them getting past this, don’t you think? And anyway, people in this fandom definitely aren’t afraid to throw out canon, so I don’t know why people are clinging to this element of GerIta and trying to spin it as “Germany’s just frustrated and yells at him because he cares about him!” People go on and on about GerIta being a cute and wholesome ship, but then they portray Germany as verbally abusive. Maybe it’s just my annoyance at people labeling ships like RusAme or FrUk as abusive because they have disagreements and less than stellar histories, but then those same people ignore obvious abuse in their own ship’s fandom because “rules for thee but not for me.” But yeah...GerIta is cute, when handled as a “best friends who were the last to get the memo that they were dating” sort of ship. Germany sighing in frustration at Italy saying something dumb but endearing, and just kinda being like “yeah...he’s an idiot...but he’s my idiot.”

Anyway, this is getting long, but you get the idea about what kinds of things turn me off of ships.

[ectogeo-art]

omg i want to hear about romulan embassy siskarak

WIP ask meme

Omg, yes, thank you for asking, I’m so excited about this one!!!! :D The fic idea appeared to me fully formed as soon as I saw this post by @the-last-dillards about how in a scene cut from “The Wire”, Sisko mentions that he and Curzon were at an embassy on Romulus when Sisko was about Julian's age, and dillards speculated that it would be funny if Sisko and Curzon happened to be there at the same time as Garak was on Romulus posing as a gardener. Most everyone else who saw that post was like "lmao Curzon/Garak <3" and while that is extremely funny too, the Sisko/Garak implications are soooo much more interesting to me personally.

I think Sisko would be an interesting parallel-but-not-quite to Julian. I feel like young Sisko would be similarly bright and passionate and idealistic, which we KNOW is a type Garak is attracted to, but unlike Julian, Sisko would NOT put up with Garak’s bullshit mindgames, he would NOT find Garak inherently charming.

And then there’s Garak, still young, on top of his game, feeling confident and powerful and indestructible (but ultimately just Tain’s pawn... he’s been indoctrinated to love Cardassia unconditionally and hasn’t really had that challenged in any way yet).

They would both find each other extremely grating. Sisko embodies everything Garak hates about the Federation, so Garak would want to take him down a peg, make him sink to Garak’s level. Sisko would be infuriated by Garak’s duplicitous and condescending nature, but maybe Garak also keeps saying things that are juuuust provocative enough that Sisko can’t seem to help arguing back against his points (and Sisko really doesn’t get how that’s somehow turning both of them on...).

So that’s the gist why I’m obsessed with the potential for this pairing during pre-canon in general. Now onto the fic itself! Juuuust in case I never get around to actually writing this, here’s my detailed plan for the romulan embassy siskarak fic:

Sisko and Curzon are on assignment at the Federation embassy on Romulus. The Federation embassy is holding an open house next week. Sisko offers to help cook the food for the event, because he has an idea to incorporate ingredients from other cultures into his jambalaya recipe to Symbolize how cultural exchange can lead to amazing new technological advances and/or art and/or political alliances (or idk, whatever overwrought metaphor an excited young Sisko decides is galaxy brain levels of diplomacy). Curzon's just like “hell yeah, sounds great, kid! go for it!”

So Ensign Sisko (or whatever his rank is at that point idk) asks around at the other embassies nearby for ingredients native to their homeworlds. They give him some recommendations, but he’d have to replicate or import the ingredients. But then he gets to the Cardassian embassy and they have this beeeeautiful garden, overflowing with native Cardassian produce. Sisko asks the gardener there (Garak) if he can possibly use some of the vegetables for his jambalaya of interplanetary diplomacy.

Garak is instantly annoyed by how performative and insipid Sisko’s project is... but Garak knows he has to play nice and hand over the vegetables. He also knows how much he doesn't want sisko rendering these vegetables he's been diligently tending into tasteless inedible garbage that an unrefined Federation or Romulan palate couldn’t possibly even appreciate... So he smiles politely, and offers to show him the proper way to cook it. Tonight. In Sisko’s quarters.

Garak internally justifies this unnecessary dinner date by deciding that it will be a good opportunity to scope out the inside of the Federation embassy. And so what if he’s also getting a little riled up thinking about all the delicious arguments he might have with this headstrong and attractive Starfleet officer? So what if he kind of wants to figure out what he has to say in order break Sisko’s composure? What he can say that would make Sisko, despite his self-satisfied demeanor of peace and acceptance and understanding, angrily slam Garak into the wall hard enough to trigger the pleasurable rush of the implant...?

Meanwhile back in sisko POV... Sisko gladly accepts, actually quite eager to learn more about cooking, and a little curious about this strange Cardassian gardener who seems a little bit interested in him. (He’s not annoyed by Garak yet, because all he’s seen is his mask, his poker face.) Curzon’s taught Sisko everything about diplomacy and how to be a Starfleet officer and how to be a person, and sisko looks up to him in a bit of an unhealthy way. Sisko knows that the easiest way to impress Curzon is to score with an alien. Sisko’s maybe a little curious to see if that’s what Garak is interested in, so that Sisko will have something to brag about with Curzon.

[sidenote: idk where Jennifer is in this timeline (but also the canon timeline of when Curzon and Sisko were off on adventures that included banging twin alien chicks and getting falling-down-drunk together seems inconsistent with the canon timeline of when Sisko and Jennifer met lolll)... anyway, maybe bennifer are on a break bc of the long-distance while he’s on Romulus, and/or bc she maybe doesn’t particularly like the influence Curzon has had on him and they very recently got in a fight about it.]

Okay, so now it’s that night in Sisko’s quarters. For now let’s just gloss right over the (presumably horny as hell) scene about the chopping and stewing and seasoning of the vegetables—during which the arguments (and resulting tensions) between them build and build, from little things like vegetable chopping techniques to the fundamental paradigms of their worldviews and senses of morality—and let’s fast forward directly into the middle of their fight about whether the federation sucks more than the cardassian empire: Garak out of nowhere just starts undoing his shirt while saying something inflammatory questioning the federation’s true commitment to cultural exchange... Garak basically implies that Sisko is a hypocrite who has been arguing for ideals he doesn’t believe in if he doesn’t want to bang Garak RIGHT NOW...

And then they bang, And it’s a mess, and they HATE each other, and it’s really hot. Or at least, that’s the idea. ( @delicatetrashstranger volunteered to help write the E-rated part, for which I am very grateful, lol.) In the end, the weird space jambalaya burns while they are going at it, and everything is ruined and smells terrible, and Sisko doesn’t even WANT to brag about this one to Curzon, because he is not proud of how he let Garak get under his skin. Garak maybe experiences A Consequence of some kind that makes him realize he can’t recklessly throw himself at Federation hotties (like... maybe something Sisko says makes him question a Truth he was certain of, or maybe this fling has jeopardized his assassination plans somehow, or maybe there is a close call where he almost reveals something personal about himself, or almost accidentally leaves behind his underwear, which is where he keeps some of his sci fi Spy Gadgets, lol idk).

The end!

Hope you’ve enjoyed this summary of my fic... I hope I actually write it one day XD (If anyone feels inspired by any aspect of this and wants to run with it, PLEASE DO! Also, if, like me, you desperately Need this fic to exist, feel free to let me know that you’re excited about it! My brain is all garashir all the time, so any WIP that’s not garashir sometimes needs to be helped along by external motivation lol.)