#idk they’re making their problems everyone’s problems as usual

[serial-serializednovelreader]

Nova’s Notes - DD - May 8th

That’s right, I’m deciding to give my thoughts a cheesy name because why not (also it’s late oops).

So this may be one of my favorite entires of the entire book. My first go-around it was for the mirror-yeet scene (because that’s iconic) and Dracula being The Housekeeper of all timeTM, but now it’s also one of my favorites because of how much we learn about Jonathan.

They say you learn the most about a person when they’re in crisis mode, and while I don’t always think that’s true, Stoker definitely wanted to let Jonathan’s personality shine through here.

From the first passage, he’s literally guessed that Dracula is undead. “I fear I am the only living soul here.” Sure, he might mean that he’s the only present soul, if Dracula’s left the building, but since he describes the mirror yeeting scene right after…idk, I’d like to think he knows way more than we ever gave him credit for. “Clueless Jonathan” who? Is the clueless in the room with us?

Also going back to the first sentence where he describes worrying he was getting too wordy, but now being glad he did…oof. I feel for him here. If my theory is correct that he was initially writing in a more detailed way for Mina so he could remember his travels for later…I’m sure it’s hitting him now that while it may be saving his life that he’s more detailed, it’s so twisted that something he did as a note of affection has soured. I wonder if he’s thinking about how he may never get out of this, or if that hasn’t fully hit him yet.

Moving on to everyone’s favorite mirror-yeet scene, think about how Jonathan reacts when he’s caught off guard by Dracula because he didn’t see his reflection. How would most protagonists react? Probably laugh nervously and brush it off. Attribute it to some mistake on his part, which is exactly what Jonathan does *at first*. But after, he looks at Dracula and then looks back at the mirror to confirm his suspicions are correct, which they are. It’s an interesting moment and not one I think we see often at the beginning of a horror story (I don’t consume much horror though, so correct me if I’m wrong!). Usually, a character won’t get to this level of observation until towards the middle/end, when more supernatural elements have occurred. Jonathan may have second guessed his instincts, but checking them again is what makes him more likely to survive Castle Dracula.

Plus, when Dracula makes a move to attack him, his first instinct is to dodge the attack, showing that he’s not just going to freeze up at the first sign of trouble (which I want to emphasize isn’t a problem normally, but he is dealing with a thousands-of-years-old vampire…so, he has to be quick on his feet to survive).

Afterwards, he says he is annoyed at losing his mirror rather than disturbed, but I saw another post saying he’s repressing his panic as annoying (I’ll link it if I find it again) and I definitely think that’s true!! I can totally see that as his coping mechanism. Plus, compared to the rest of what happens for him today, it really is more of an annoyance than anything else. Would you rather your host throw away your mirror or lock you in a castle?

So after that horrific scene of terror, Jonathan is proactive in searching the castle. After finding a beautiful — but slightly horrifying landscape (you know it’s bad when he doesn’t stop to describe the view) — he decides to explore further, which leads him to figure out almost every other door is locked, including the front one to find, yep you guessed it…he’s a prisoner in the castle.

As I imagine most people would, at first he reacts by frantically running around trying to open locked doors like “a rat does in a trap.” The fact that he admits this in his diary (and, by extension to Mina/us) is admirable because it already shows he’s not afraid to be open about his emotions, even if it makes him look weak (which — unfortunately, he would, considering the time period). Most heroes of this period were expected to accept their fates with stoic determination, but that’s not human and that’s not how Jonathan is, either. We’ve already seen that he’s more open-minded than most English men by accepting the crucifix even if he doesn’t understand it and of course the way he shows his love for Mina is atypical for Victorian men as well. Most men wouldn’t go to the trouble of writing down descriptive notes just to recount it for the benefit of his fiancée later. It’s sad, but true.

Once he’s able to regulate himself a bit, it’s time for thinking and strategy, determining that he needs all of his wits to get through this! Once he sees that the Count does the cooking AND the cleaning, though, is when my love for Jonathan reaches an all-time high. He comes to a series of conclusions most protagonists don’t figure out until the end of a novel after way more obvious clues have been laid out for him and it’s only his 3rd day of being in the castle!! They go as follows:

A) Dracula = servants

B) Dracula = driver

C) Dracula = control wolves

D) Villager’s concern/gifts = this is worse than I thought

E) Crucifix = actual help?

F) Get Dracula to talk about himself (not hard) = find more information, but not in an obvious way

I also love that he questions his own biases about the crucifix he was given!!!! When else do you see an Englishman do that in the 1890s of his own volition (aka without someone snarkily telling him to - see BBC’s Dracula if you want an example). I certainly haven’t!

He also noticed that Drac talked about his “ancestors” as if he had been present for their battles (hmm wonder why that is). Hasn’t quite figured it out yet, but there’s evidence that he doesn’t write something down as a fact until he knows it is a fact, so perhaps we’ll see him write more on this later.

Final thought - his reference to Arabian Nights and Hamlet is significant and tragic, but also relatable. I too like to relate my life to my favorite blorbos, Jonathan!

All in all, we learned that Jonathan is very good in a crisis. He’s not stoic like most protagonists of his time period, but he is instead strategic and observant, willing to play the part of oblivious to keep himself alive another day and keep Dracula’s trust. This is likely what’s keeping him alive right now, as an aggressive approach would get him killed. Dracula is all about playing with his prey and keeping the illusion of benevolent host and willing guest — it’s a game of control for him. Breaking this game would mean it’s no fun and no fun would mean Jonathan is no longer needed….

While I know how this story goes, I’m as excited as first time readers to see how Jonathan plays what is, essentially, 4D chess with Dracula!

[panthera-tigris-venenata]

So I did write today. And you could get context but that would require effort on my part.

So lets just say the Isle kids decided to recreate Chaos Games in Auradon and roped good few hero kids to join. (Part one’s out there somewhere and yes I plan on finishing this damn thing.)

Audrey has yet to set out, but she has much shorter walk, nevermind the advantage of home territory.

Though she also has two very impatient Li siblings with a phone on the speaker, yelling into it in Chinese and communicating last-minute details with their parents – they agreed to lend them an unit of the Great Chinese Army, for a practical exercise.

Yes, that’s how they’re calling it.

Anything but „Crazy Death-Magic Game,“ which was Audrey’s preferred title. Or „Chaos Games,“ as they’ve apparently been dubbed by the Isle kids a long time ago.

She supposes she should call Arabella, see if the Atlantica princess is still on, too; she takes out her phone.

„What, princess, getting cold feet?“ asks Anthony Tremaine lazily from where he’s sprawled on the sofa, Ginny Gothel more or less laying in his lap. „You really should.“

„Don’t talk nonsense,“ she scoffs at him, „And if you’re only here to kick my morale under, doors are over there.“ She flicks her hand in the correct direction, ready to finally call Arabella.

„Why, sweetheart, me? Undermining your morale? I’d never!“

Ginny laughs, which has absolutely nothing to do with his statement, Audrey is sure. She glares at both of them, to absolutely no effect. One of the more unfortunate side effects of Isle upbringing, or maybe just coexisting with their unspoken girlfriend.

„You absolutely would, Tremaine,“ she answers, „And for no reason whatsoever, I’m sure. And why are you here, anyway?“

Anthony runs his hand across Ginny’s scalp – Ginny has stopped paying attention to the conversation again – and says: „You wound me, Audrey Rose, you wound me. I’m here as your advisor, and you’re so gonna need one if you want to stand a chance at this thing.“

„I do not!“ Well, now Audrey is offended.

Li siblings have hung up the phone and are now speaking to each other, still agitated. Very unconcerning thing, just as the next sentence from Anthony’s mouth.

„Oh believe me, you do. Harriet could probably take you all herself, if she wanted.“

Audrey freezes for a bit; she so didn’t sign up for this, thank you for asking. Finally, she shakes off her shock: „…Yeah,“ she says as she gestures at his expression with her pointer finger, drawing a circle in the air, „You really have to take off the heart eyes when you say stuff like that. Both of you,“ she adds with a quick glance at Ginny.

Ignoring their wide smiles, she turns around and dials Arabella. The phone rings for about a minute before announcing that the called is unreachable. What a bitch. Audrey glares at her phone for the offense and then turns around again.

„And what are you doing there, Gothel?“ she asks for lack of better things to do.

„Hmm?“

„I said, why are you here?“

„Oh,“ dismisses Ginny, „I’m a neutral party. I can do what I wanna.“ Anthony bends down to kiss her temple. Probably just because he can – Audrey looks away quickly.

„And why are you here?“ she questions again.

„I’m a medic. You’re gonna need me, sooner or later,“ Ginny says easily, as if that explained anything; she props herself up to kiss Anthony properly.

And why, yes, Audrey is starting to regret this whole thing greatly.

She shakes her head at the couple and joins Lonnie and Junior instead: They’ve got a war to plan. And maybe Arabella will finally call her back.

[wordsbyrian]

Surgeries and Surprises - Alex Morgan x Reader

Summary: "Skater!R gets injured", "Skater!R skates in XGames", "IDK but more Skater!R"

A/n: Look, I finally wrote a thing you guys! From multiple request for more Skater!R

Despite popular belief, skateboarding is an incredibly multifaceted activity.

There are so many different disciplines: street, vert, park, freestyle, downhill (and its variation street luge), and cruising.

For the first four, there are different competitions that skaters can compete in if they are so inclined. And in all honesty, you are usually not inclined to compete, preferring the unpredictable nature of actual street skating to the polished finish of comps like Street League, XGames, and Dew Tour.

But the chance to be one of the first skateboarders to compete in the Olympics.

Well, that’s not really something you can pass up on.

Which is why you’re skating in your 5th comp of the summer.

Not the worst schedule but you’re an idiot and made the choice to also try and get clips for your next video parts in your very limited free time.

Free time, that was only made more limited by the way you were constantly flying back and forth to France to support your wife in the World Cup.

All of this is to say that your body is currently going through it.

And, unluckily, it’ll keep going through it because XGames comps are not set up in a way that plays to your strengths, with only three 45 seconds runs to string together a line and show the judges what you can do.

Luckily, on the other hand, your flight out of Minneapolis is booked for immediately after the contest ends.

Your first two timed runs went pretty well but you know you can do better which is why you saved your best stuff for your final run.

And for the most part, your final run goes pretty well until you get to your last trick with 10 seconds remaining.

You had planned it out perfectly so that you had enough time to take a breath before giving it a go. A necessary precaution for a trick you're familiar with but not a master at, a frontside flip noseslide to fakie, especially since you’re trying it down the biggest obstacle, the 4-block rail.

A little homage to Reynolds, something you’ve been doing throughout the contest season.

Except there are a couple of problems.

The first is that, unlike Reynolds, you are not a master of the frontside flip.

The other is that after a long day of being skated by just about everyone, the rail had picked up the wax from everyone’s boards, making it slicker than you need it to be for your noseslide.

Which is why you aren’t very surprised when you hit the ground. The only surprising thing is how much it hurts.

You immediately roll over and begin to stand up and take a few steps, only to drop to one knee after barely making it anywhere.

As you try to gather the strength to stand again, you’re stopped by someone placing a hand on your shoulder.

“Stay down, Y/N/N.” It’s Reynolds. “You just used your head as a basketball and your arm is fucked. They’re bringing out a stretcher.”

“I’m fine,” you say, trying to get up again. “I don’t need a stretcher.”

His hand gets firmer and you feel him pushing you to sit down properly.

“I’m serious, Y/N, I’m serious,” he says. “I’m telling you this as your friend, not as your boss. You need to go to the hospital, your shit is fucked.”

It’s at this moment that you realize how quiet the arena is.

It’s almost as if you can hear the individualized breaths of everyone in the building and honestly, it's making your head pound in a way that you wish you weren’t familiar with.

Then you see the EmTs rolling the stretcher towards you.

“Fuck dude,” you groan, resigning yourself to your fate. “Just don’t call Alex, man, she’s gonna freak out.”

“It’s too late, she already texted me she’s trying to get on the next flight out.”

“Shit.”

The entire process of letting the EMTs do their jobs is a hassle because it’s painfully obvious that they don’t deal with skateboarders often. And it takes a lot of convincing for you to even let them strap you to the backboard.

Your memory blurs out a bit after that.

The only thing you really remember besides waking up in the hospital is telling Reynolds to make sure that they don’t give you anything stronger than a Tylenol (that didn’t happen).

When you regain consciousness it’s to the sound of voices, two you recognize and one you don’t.

“She should be coming out of the anesthesia soon,” the recognizable voice says, a doctor maybe. “In addition to her mild concussion, there were some moderate tears to her deltoid that were repaired in surgery. Unfortunately, there’s not much we can do about the fractures to the humeral head as we can’t cast the area.”

“She’s not going to like the sound of that,” you hear Alex say, “Not going to like that at all.”

“Unfortunately, whether she likes it or not doesn’t really matter. She needs to be in the sling for a few weeks at least,” the doctor says.

“Alright, thanks doc,” Reynolds' loud voice makes the headache you forgot you had worse. “Don’t worry Alex, she’s been through worse. Besides, the medal will make her feel better.”

“Not now Andrew.”

The door to your room opens a tiny bit and through squinted eyes, you watch as both your wife and mentor slip through the crack, closing the door behind them.

When they get close enough that you can make out the details on their faces, you stick your hand out to Alex and attempt to pull her into the hospital bed with you.

She doesn’t let you though and instead releases your hand to pull the only chair closer to the bed.

“Not so fast, hotshot,” she says, keeping her voice low.

“I told Andrew to tell you that you didn’t need to come all the way out here. You should be at home resting,” you tell her.

“And I told him that I was already on my way to the airport.”

“And I told you,” Reynolds says, frowning at you, “that I wasn’t going to risk having your wife mad at me.”

You roll your eyes at him.

“Now here’s your medal, silver’s not too bad considering you knocked yourself out,” he says, placing the item on the edge of the bed. “I’ll see you around bro.”

Both you and Alex watch as he quickly exits the room, moving sort of like his ass is on fire, and leaving the two of you alone.

The second the door fully shuts behind him you turn back to Alex and see more than her sigh deeply.

“How do you feel…”

“Why weren’t you…”

You both try to speak at the same time.

“No, you go ahead,” you tell her.

“Well, first of all, were you just about to ask how I’m feeling while you are literally laying in a hospital bed,” she asks.

You shrug somewhat sheepishly and say, “I mean you just flew halfway across the country and I know you haven’t been feeling the best lately.”

“Y/N/N, you’re ridiculous.”

“Anyway,” she says, rolling her eyes at you, “Why weren’t you wearing a helmet? You can only smash your head so many times before the damage is irreversible and I don’t like constantly being called to hospitals wondering if this time is the one.”

You take a second to let her words sink in.

She’s right.

Ever since the two of you reconnected and subsequently got together roughly 4 years ago, you’ve been injured quite a bit.

This is your 3rd concussion and 4th broken. You’ve also ruptured your achilles, cracked a few ribs, had one of your lungs collapse, and gotten over 50 stitches from various gashes gained from getting cut open skating some sketchy spots.

That’s not even counting the smaller ones that you haven’t told her about, like when you sprained your ankle visiting her during the Rio Olympics.

But admitting that Alex is right has never been something you’re great at.

So instead you just scoot over in the bed and ask her to lay down with you again.

It takes a bit of pleading but you do get her to join you and when she does, you’re quick to wiggle around into a position that's comfortable but still allows you to hold her.

With the knowledge that your current position makes it impossible for her to see your face, you can’t help but crack a joke.

“C'mon, babe, you know that helmets are for hills and hills only,” you say, finally answering her question, only to immediately recoil as she pinches you. “Okay, I’m sorry. I know I really freaked you out today and I hate that I keep forcing you to come see me in hospitals. And I…” she cuts you off.

“You’re not forcing me to do anything,” she protests, keeping her voice light. “I love you even though you seem dead set on destroying your body.”

“It’s not really on purpose,” you say, pulling her impossibly closer. “I don’t know how to explain it but sometimes when I skate it’s like an out-of-body experience. Nothing matters except how good it’s gonna feel when I roll away. I can barely even think straight when I’m on my board but that obviously means I don’t think about how my choices affect others and that’s not fair to you.”

When you finish speaking, the first thing you hear from your wife is a sigh that can only be described as annoyed.

“What,” you ask.

“You’re an idiot,” she says.”

“Babe,” your voice is indignant, and too loud even to your own ears.

“I’m sorry but you’re so dumb,” she says. “I’m not concerned because of how it affects me, I care about how it affects you. You’ve been acting strangely all summer and I don’t really want to see where this path takes you.”

Once again Alex is right.

And her pointing out your recent odd behavior, something you hadn’t noticed yourself, is like a bucket of ice water over your head.

Taking a deep breath, you nod even though she can’t see you and say, “I think I need to call my sponsor.”

“That sounds like a good idea.”

Unfortunately, between your concussion and having to travel back to Orlando, the call to your sponsor had to wait a few days.

And in those few days, you begin to really notice the behaviors Alex had mentioned.

Even before your injury, you were stressed and anxious but you had ignored it, believing it was tied to the comps and upcoming deadlines.

But now with those things mostly out of the way, the intensity of these feelings is familiar and you aren’t very fond of the places you ended up the last few times you felt like this.

And the isolation of being trapped at home, unable to do much more than stare at the walls and wait for Alex to get back from training, only made those feelings stronger.

When you’re finally able to make that call and the first words finally come out of your mouth, it’s as though the weight of the world comes off your shoulders.

Recovery isn’t an instant process but you do instantly feel a little better as you explain your recent behaviors that you now recognize as somewhat erratic.

And when the call ends, you have a list of dates, times, and locations so you can go to a meeting whenever you need to.

The only thing that's really left for you to do is talk to your wife when she gets home but that might be the hardest part.

So you wait, completing as many boring household tasks as you can to make the time pass more quickly.

It doesn’t really work that well because you only have one arm to work with. And you're just unlucky enough that it's your dominant hand out of commission.

You’re in the middle of unloading the dishwasher when you hear the front door open and shut.

It doesn’t take long for Alex to find you and in the back of your mind, you know that the only reason she didn’t shout your name across the house like she normally does is because of your lingering headache.

“Hey babe,” you hear her greet as you bend over to place a pot in its designated cabinet.

“Hi,” you respond, standing back up and turning to face her, only to see that she’s already taken a seat at the island. “Oh, that’s the serious conversation chair,” you note, going to lean on the counter opposite her.

“I mean it is serious but it’s nothing bad.”

“If it’s nothing bad, do you mind if I go first,” you ask, “Mine isn’t bad either but I finally got around to giving Noah a call.”

When you say that it's almost as though you can feel the energy in the room shift.

“How did that go?”

“It definitely went.”

“Are you going to elaborate or…”

Sighing deeply, you shuffle your feet, focusing on the way your socks slip over the tile.

“Apparently, when you’re really stressed and overly tired your brain chemistry changes,” you tell her, now looking up at the ceiling. “Which makes people look for things to relieve the stress, which can be a bad thing for addicts. And between the video parts, qualifiers, and flying all over the place, I haven’t actually had a chance to sit down and think, much less attend a meeting. But now, when I would’ve had a chance to, I can barely be in a room with lights on for more than 15 minutes.”

There’s a moment of silence before Alex responds and as it passes, you can feel your heart sink further and further into your stomach. This is the moment that she finally decides that being with you is far more work than it's worth.

Your downward spiral is broken by the sound of her voice.

“I guess that means that we have to come up with ways for you to handle stress when you're busy,” Alex says, “because you’re only about to get busier.”

“What? No, I’m not, the next two competitions are at the end of the month and I literally can’t skate for the next month and a half.”

“3 months,” she shoots back, “and yes you will.”

“You’re not making any sense Alex.”

Alex gets up from her seat and makes her way toward you. Before you know it, she’s reaching out for your good hand, which to this point has had a death grip on the counter behind you, not that you’ve noticed.

With a confused look on your face, you watch as she pulls your hand to rest against her stomach before covering it with both of her own.

Still confused, it takes you longer than you’d like to admit to figure out why she would do that.

It’s only when you remember the seemingly never-ending nausea Alex has been dealing with that you connect the dots.

“Oh shit.”

[azulsluver]

I just want to ramble a little bit but- My personal scenario/headcanon for Bully au (which by the way, I love your writing) is that maybe one day reader decides to disappear, even if for a little while, maybe they just hide in some place for a long period of time (or hilariously and sneakily find a way to avoid their bullies throughout an entire day, or even crazier a whole week!!). They're so emotionally destroyed that they start to actually believe their insults and awful treatment they endured, and so they decide to just isolate themselves further somewhere no one can "be burdened by me"- Which in turn causes everyone else to at first get pissed off and then more and more (slightly, very slightly) worried that their punching bag is missing.... Perhaps, even have escaped them? 👀 I would love to see who loses their composure first, even if they don't admit their obsession at all lmao

Anon you don’t know what you’re doing to me //0//

tw. Bully!characters, no one takes you seriously kinda, yandere, stalking, baby tantrums.

This was more crack than anything serious…idk what happened but rants bellow!

They genuinely start tweakin:

Riddle, Deuce, Kalim, Malleus, Jack, Silver, Ruggie, Idia, Vil

They’re the ones that usually have their eyes on you, to find out that you’re missing and not at a place they SPECIFICALLY told you to be/stay flares their attention. Sure they can last a couple of days without you but a week? Nuh uh, they think they’re responsible for whatever you do, once they find you you’re getting a whole lecture. Telling you they’d get in trouble if they hadn’t found you sooner but let’s be real here.

But if you hid in a place far far away from them (which is impressive and impossible tbh) they’re already having a meltdown. Biting fingernails, aggressively running their fingers through their hair. All of that, and the ones who usually stay composed in situations like these (Ruggie/Riddle/Malleus) start to overthink so bad that they look beyond stress. It’s the thought that maybe you ran away from them or worse got kidnapped or lost. Which makes them have more of a reason to keep a tighter leash on you.

Ok but Kalim, Idia and Deuce cry like babies and throw tantrums.

Let the imagination work so think of Vil sitting on the kitchen table with his hair tied up and a face mask on while wearing a robe, a cup of coffee in his hands as he stares off into the distance that looks like he’s about to stab someone. He deadass thinks he’s growing grey hairs and has eyebags because his favorite punching bag is missing after two weeks. Who is he gonna step on now..

Gets pissed off:

Leona, Ace, Azul, Sebek, Epel, Jamil

“But why?” Is what they said when they perfectly understand the problem. Do they feel bad? No. In fact people like Leona and Azul can go through days without you because they’re always busy with something rather than terrorizing you. BUT you have to understand that as much as they pretend to not care they aren’t willing to clean up the mess after your pity party.

Jamil and Sebek are only mad about you disappearing is because of Malleus and Kalim’s whining. Please save them.

Ace and Epel are the ones who are mega mad as in a corny way. “How dare my punching bag run away from me and disappear for days!!” Typa stuff. Unbeknownst to them they double the insults and it makes you even more depressed lmaoo.

Ehhh Jamil may actually panic as well, because when Kalim isn’t happy no one is. And he does misses you personally, worries when he finds you (which is really scary to [Name’s] pov bc why is he so caring??) he’s all over you to make sure you aren’t injured or anything. Still pissed so he might slap the back of your head a couple of times and lecture you + same thing goes when Sebek finds you except he doesn’t comfort you.

Thinks it’s amusing:

Rook, Jade, Floyd, Trey, Cater, Lilia,

“Ohoho did I go overboard?” Yea you did. Anyways little shits don’t feel bad in fact they think it’s funny and cute that you disappeared because you couldn’t handle the insults and took it for granted. Lilia and Jade giving you false comfort just to do it all over again when you make a mistake. They probably already know your hiding spots and camp there to experiment how long it’ll take for you to come crawling back.

Maybe, just a little bit that Trey feels bad. He coddles you for a while then goes right back to gaslighting because he’s always right and when he says these things to you it’s because you’re wrong!! The type to restrict his affections if you decide to go into another episode of running away and crying. Cater knows where ya at bc you have location on.

At first Floyd was pissed because his resting place is missing, like bae where you go? But eventually he understands where you went because for some reason he’s bullying everyone around him and stalking your location to see where ya at. Mocks you once he finds you, really mean but it wasn’t “entirely” intentional. Like he knows he’s at fault and is trying to cheer you up by mocking your “problems”. Ok but don’t do that again or he’s going on the genuinely tweakin box.

We all saw Rook being in this section no surprise. Knows every little place you could be right now, has his eyes on you 24/7. “My love I didn’t mean to say your lips are chapped and you can use some Vaseline but the whole thing would be gone isa joke :(“ it’s not. Purposely picks out your insecurities so you can do another runaway.

[reveluving]

Damn ive never seen you earlier, you write graves just amazing :(

Idk if you are still taking requests but how do you think graves approached his shy gf/wife in the first place? Is he persuasive?

Aww babe!! That is so nice of you to say! 😭 Sorry it took a bit of time ‘cause I admit, I’ve never thought of this, not deeply, at least! Please enjoy ‘cause I know I did 😘💗

Includes: tooth-rotting fluff!

COD x shy!wife thots closed! Thank you, everyone, for your time & amazing minds! I sincerely hope I can do this again with y'all soon! 💌

Come & check out my COD m.list!

The possibilities of meeting Graves for the first time are endless, but I have two in mind!

The first scenario is a typical but well-loved meet cute at a café, or a bookstore or better; a book café! With you and him standing in one corner of the counter, waiting for your drinks. Graves has zero problems in offering you a polite smile, only for his amusement to grow when you return the smile, albeit a smaller one, before immediately averting your gaze. 

The barista’s taking a while to make your drinks, so after some time, he thought of just striking up a conversation.

“They’re sure takin’ their sweet time.” Was the first thing he said to you. A lighthearted comment—you would’ve been more worried if he was more gruff about it, and you weren’t even a worker there.

You nod, huffing in amusement while looking at the dishevelled teenager, “They don’t usually take this long.”

Graves nods along and though he asks you some things, such as if you were a regular customer or if you had any recommendations, regardless of whether it was sweet treats or any novels you may have stumbled upon (even if he’s not a fan of reading, he may or may not like the way you slowly yet surely open up with him), he keeps them a bare minimum. He doesn’t want you to feel forced, especially since he began the conversation.

Soon, the barista finally completes your order, but unfortunately, it’s prepared wrongly. 

Yours were hot while Graves was iced. The complete opposite of what you and he asked for.

He was perceptive, seeing you grimace but also ready to just accept whatever was offered, Graves spoke up.

“Excuse me, kid, but I’m pretty sure you got our orders mixed up,” You would’ve panicked if it wasn’t for his cordial approach. Disappointed or not, he had no problem hiding it. And even so, you couldn’t help but feel bad when they heard the dreadful words. They must’ve faced a harsher customer in the past. 

Graves was quick to reassure them, even telling them to take the mistaken orders and share with a colleague, much to your surprise. Of course, you weren’t expecting him to lash out, not right away, at least, but you weren’t blind to his… lifestyle. Just from the way he carried himself, you knew he must be some kind of a ‘man of the hour’. That, and the way he dressed/his items i.e. his laptop bag, phone. 

And yet, you never saw him as one of those unapproachable degenerates. Thinking they were high and mighty, maybe even cause a ruckus and gain some kind of benefit out of it. He was confident, sure, but he could’ve just ignored you the whole time, much like now. 

“Thank you.” You thanked him softly when the barista, with the weight seemingly lifted off their shoulders, went back to make you and Graves’ orders again. 

“It’s no problem. Thought y’might need a little help.” So he did notice. You wanted the floor to swallow you whole for not hiding your emotion better, but something about his smile, his lack of judgement, it didn’t make you feel too bad about it all. 

Plus, you couldn’t lie and say he wasn’t easy on the eye, either.

Bonus if you decide to take a leap and accept his offer of sitting together at the window seat, especially if it’s during the lunch rush! The two of you may become regulars at the café and soon enough, you exchange numbers!

The second scenario is actually part of a mini-series that I’m working on (read: collecting dust), with you being a florist! While I won’t spoil a whole lot, it involves our beloved Shiba Inu. By now, we all know Kai is extremely playful, borderline mischievous if it means being a loving pain in Graves’ ass. 

So, after looking away for a moment, only to find Kai making a mess out of some flower shop owner’s potted flowers, he’s initially more disappointed (but not surprised) than worried. But nothing a little Southern charm and a bit of reimbursement can’t solve. 

That is until he sees you.

And while this revelation wouldn’t leave him to tuck his tail between his legs, I can see him going like ‘oh’, turning away for a second to swear under his breath before putting on his award-winning smile. But in all honesty, there’s a tad bit of guilt in it, especially after he overhears you forgive Kai, who, surprisingly, is whimpering in front of you, despite your soft tone.

Oh, how Graves could never forget your voice. 

Upon approaching you at the front door, he immediately apologizes, and unlike other times where he’s trying to rush the conversation so it could all be said and done, he’s very patient with you, partially praying that you were with him, too. There’s just something so magnetic about you that he doesn’t want the conversation to end so soon. But with your bashfulness, he knows not to overwhelm you either, which was funny, since he never particularly thinks about that with others.

And from there, he has an inkling that you may be one of the few people he’s willing to learn more about while considering his own personality. So, while he doesn’t shy away from showing you his romantic side, and spoils you a whole lot, too, he also lets you know about his more ‘disliked’ personality. On days when you and he are more heart-to-heart with each other, he tells you about the side of him where he has to play offence to be the person that he is. He wants to be as transparent with you as possible, so you won’t catch a ‘whiplash’ with how he treats you versus how he treats others.

Whichever the cases may be, while he is persuasive, knowing that you’re one of a kind, he knows this is something he has to be patient about, and frankly, he’s more than fine with it. If you have a history of bad dating experiences, then you best believe that he’s willing to show you just how much you mean to him, and hopefully, vice versa. Graves isn’t one to think about a committed relationship, mostly because he never found one and with his line of work, it’s a lot to think about, but he is more than willing to adapt to the new changes (and finally spoil ‘the one’) for you.

˚ · . f i n . · ˚

[henry-fox-biggest-stan]

Okay so I need people are who are diagnosed as autistic to help me out here

I been suspecting for a long time (like around a year, maybe more idk) than I might be autistic, and I did research (genuinely, not just taking some Internet quiz and self-diagnosing based on it) and I want to know if there’s a genuine chance I might be autistic, or if I have a wrong view on autism (basically, if I’m wrong about it and what it means to be autistic).

Some things than happen to me than I’ve seen also happen to a big amount of autistic people

-Problems with food since very little. Not based on taste, but texture. Eating something with the wrong texture is just horrible.

-Always felt different from my peers, never quite fitting in because I didn’t know how to interact with them. As if they knew exactly what to do and I was just flying blind. I heard people say than they felt as if everyone was born with a book of rules, meanwhile they had to learn from watching everyone else already know them, and I think that’s the best way for me to explain it.

-Intense interests on stuff, really intense. Like, is all I can think about day and night, I relate everything to it in some way or another, I know everything about it down to the smallest detail, some might call me obsessed and I wouldn’t deny it. Reminds me of the way people with autism describe their hiperfixations.

-People thought I was “gifted” as a kid, and said than I was a kid with the mind of an adult. I’m no genius, I was just interested on different stuff than other kids. I was the first one to learn to read and I never stopped. I basically lived in the library as a kid. I have a vivid memory of when I must have been like 10 and saying than my favorite thing in the world was reading and some friends looking at me like I was crazy. I’m mentioning this not because people who are autistic are “gifted”, but more because I heard they are usually interested in different stuff than their peers (doesn’t have to be more mature, it can be more immature stuff too, I think. Goes hand in hand with feeling different from everyone). Continuing on books, I also always had a higher reading level than the rest of my class. I was “a pleasure to have in class but should speak out more” kid.

-Looking back they were obviously bullying me, but I thought than they were laughing with me, not at me.

-I can’t hear the tone of my voice?? For some reason?? Sometimes I speak too loudly or too quietly or my mom says I’m being rude for “talking back” but in my head my voice is the same level and uses the same tone. So if I’m ever rude I probably don’t notice (I hate being rude to people).

-I read about overstimulation and under stimulation and it perfectly described the way I feel a lot of time. Specially overstimulation.

-If talking about something I really enjoy (hiperfixations?) I can’t be still. I’ll probably smile and fidget with something and the mere mention of it or anything regarding it outside of online spaces makes me want to scream out of excitement. Like, a really abnormal reaction to it, I believe.

-I prefer to be home on my own than outside (specially if there’s lots of people around). I don’t know if it’s hard for me to see how people are feelings, given than I learnt to notice when people don’t want me somewhere (eventually you get used to it) but sometimes when people are being nice to me I’m completely unable to see if they’re being genuine or not. An example, I was forced to spend a week sharing a room with this pair of really popular girls because of a school trip, and they were nice to me, starting conversations and stuff. So because they seemed nice, I thought they were nice. But at the end of the week I approached them and they gave me the dirtiest look and I realize they weren’t actually being genuine, they were just kind of being forced to be nice to me.

-I hate changes of routine, everyday I have the same routine and if someone wants it to change (go somewhere and do something together) they have to tell me at least a day in advance. Unless I really like them, I will feel uneasy to change my routine because it makes me feel as if I was messing everything up.

-I don’t know if it has anything to do with this, but I’m adding it just in case. I hated physical touch as a kid. Up until some years ago, I couldn’t stand it. Also don’t know if it’s related, but I always had trouble sleeping, I heard that might be a symptom but I don’t know.

-I went to a speech therapist as a kid because I couldn’t pronounce the letter s and I pronounced it as z, sometimes it still comes out. I heard problems in speech might be related but I doubt it, just adding just in case.

-I have a big sense of justice. For example everyone in my class cheats on their exams (they don’t even hide it, is more, they brag about it), and that has always upset me. Not because they can copy while I actually study, but because cheating is wrong. That’s not how it works. Why are they breaking the rules. Or for example they bring their phones to school (not nearly as bad as cheating) which is forbidden, and I don’t understand why they do that. It’s forbidden, so why?

-I notice patterns in almost everything, I also focus more on the little details than the big picture, which leads to both overthinking but also better results.

-I need people to speak to me separately. Having a conversation with two people at the same time feels like a nightmare.

-I need people to tell me things, if they want me to do them. If you made something for me to eat, don’t just put it on the table, tell me it’s for me. Otherwise I won’t touch it out of fear it’s not mine. When given instructions, I need them to be clear and detailed. All people my age are doing stuff like going to parties, drinking alcohol, meanwhile I never think of doing it and also, never knew I could do it? When did the change between going to the park to hang out without our parents for the first time and going to a party with alcohol around lots of strangers happened? Why did no one told me? How does everyone just know when to change and grow up? Why don’t I?

-Something I also noticed is than every fictional character I related to had various autism symptoms (said by people on the fandoms who are actually autistic).

[flowerui]

♫ we both like apple cider, pgw

fluff & light angst, 4.1k words ୨୧ first fic on this blog! feedback is appreciated!! ^_^ i've had awful writer's block for MONTHS so i hope i havent gotten too rusty,,,

wherein dancing is your favorite way to destress, until a certain gunwook park goes and spoils it all.

꒰ requested. gender neutral reader (no pronouns or gendered terms used), reader is a year older than gw, dancer reader, bff hanbin, one-sided enemies to friends to lovers, college au, misunderstandings, set in the us, does this count as forced proximity? light angst, fluff (it gets so cheesy idk what happened to me), drinking/underage drinking ꒱

Dancing had always been your favorite way to unwind. After a long day of classes, practice is like a treat; the mental toll of having to listen to your professors drone on all day, and procrastinating assignments until the night they’re due is easily unraveled by dancing until you can’t feel your limbs—it’s unmatched.

That’s why, despite it being Wednesday (the second worst day of the week), you walk out of your last class with a skip in your step, like nothing could ruin your day.

Nothing except a man named Hanbin, that is.

After changing, you enter the practice room, ready to forget your worries. But before you can begin, you see a paper stuck on the wall beside the door—Hanbin must’ve finally put together the choreo for the solo and duet performances for an upcoming recital for some event on campus (truthfully, you can't be bothered to remember all the details, that's Hanbin's job), and decided on who’d best fit the roles. You’re a little late, so it’s just you who curiously shuffles over to take a look.

Seeing your name under Duet makes you smile until you read your counterpart's name. Gunwook Park.

You find a spot to sink to the floor in the back of the room. Suddenly, you’ve changed your perspective on dancing; it’s the worst thing to happen to you. You regret ever discovering this useless passion of yours, who even needs passions in this economy?!

Hanbin would tell you otherwise, but you believe that you have pretty good ideas.

You’d tried to take an easier route and complain to Hanbin that you absolutely could not work with Gunwook for a duet. But he was adamant about not making any alterations at this point, at least not just because you don’t like Gunwook—what a traitor, what happened to friendship?

Since complaining about your unfair working conditions did fuck all, you came up with a wonderful solution. You get paired with the number one person on your shit list? Just don’t show up to rehearsals. Boom, problem solved. Though it’s easier said than done; you’re a creature of habit, and the disappointment of remembering you can’t destress with dance is depressing.

And, of course, avoiding both Hanbin and Gunwook is a chore.

It’s on day four that you consider, maybe Hanbin is right sometimes. You were only successful in avoiding everything except schoolwork because college kicks everyone’s ass, and finding free time starts to feel like finding a needle in a haystack. But, maybe ditching practice when you live with the leader of your dance team wasn’t your best idea. On Sundays, both you and Hanbin usually end up being home at the same time.

And like an idiot, you forget this detail and trudge out of your room at two in the afternoon (no, you certainly did not just wake up, thank you very much) to find something acceptable to eat.

As you’re rummaging through the pantry, you hear your name called in that tone. The one where Hanbin’s voice sounds mildly shrill and a bit patronizing, the one that lets you know you’re in trouble.

Yeah, not your brightest idea—it might take over the number two spot of your top three worst ideas, followed by trying to gaslight a random group of people into believing that Play-doh is edible after you’d had a drink too many at your first college party at number one. (To be fair, you did not expect a twenty-something-year-old man to have Play-Doh on hand and tell you to prove it. Yes, you tried. You vomited on the guy’s shoes.)

Rigidly, you slowly turn to face Hanbin, who has a terse smile on his face.

“...Yes?”

“I thought maybe you hadn’t shown up to rehearsals because you weren’t feeling well, but yesterday, Gunwook told me every time he spotted you on campus, you naruto-ran away.”

“Uh,” you fake cough into your elbow, “Must’ve been someone that looks like me? ‘Cause I have been feeling kind of under the we—”

You shriek and make a run for it when Hanbin stomps over with that creepy hamster puppet you’d given him as a gag gift last year in hand. Eventually, you get cornered and get a creepy hamster puppet thrown in your face. “You can’t just ditch practice because you have some petty one-sided rivalry—or whatever it is—with Gunwook. You’re risking embarrassing the whole team! What are you planning to do, just not learn the choreography?”

“You know it's not a rivalry...” You grumble.

“You’re being childish,” Hanbin sighs, “I’ve already told you that whatever your deal is with Gunwook is some misunderstanding, he’s a sweet guy.”

“Yeah, whatever.” You huff, probably not helping the childish accusation. You’re tired of hearing that about what a good guy Gunwook appears to be because you know what you heard.

Without another word, you stomp off to your room.

If you had any hopes of getting out of going to rehearsal again, they’re promptly stomped on by Hanbin waiting outside of your class when you trudge out.

“Really?” You groan, and walk over to your supposed friend, “You don’t need to escort me.”

“I think I do,” Hanbin crosses his arms, fixing you with a look, like he knows you better than yourself… okay, he does ninety percent of the time, but that doesn’t mean he can act like it. “I’m pretty sure I saw you ready to head in the wrong direction before you saw me.” He says before grabbing your arm and pulling you down the hall.

“I don’t even get what your deal is with Gunwook,” Hanbin finally says when you’re about halfway to the studio, “I know you said you heard him say something… unsavory, but that just doesn’t sound like him at all. I think you should talk to him, I’m sure it’s a misunderstanding.”

“I know what I heard, Bin…”

“I’m not saying you didn’t hear what you heard, but maybe there’s some missing context.”

You try to consider Hanbin’s words, even as you absentmindedly head into the changing rooms, and reluctantly shuffle into the practice room afterward, you truly do. 

But all the rational thinking and breathing techniques in the world cannot quell your ire when you see Gunwook. Calmly walking over and refraining from saying anything uncouth is a true test of mental strength—one that you are quite afraid of failing.

“Hey—” Gunwook rises from his spot in the corner of the practice room to greet you.

“Let’s get started.” You blurt out, aware of how cold and biting your dismissal comes off. To be fair, Hanbin didn’t tell you to be particularly nice, he just insisted you show up.

“Oh, right,” Gunwook’s expression wilts, but he clears his throat and plasters a polite smile on his face. “I’m sure Hanbin already let you know he wouldn’t be here to help us out today—he’s helping Natty with her solo. I’ve got the choreo down, so I should be able to guide you if needed.”

“I practiced at home.”  You did. A little bit, it wasn’t easy with the limited space in your cramped—ahem, homey apartment. But practicing a duet by yourself, then giving up after stubbing your toe on every fucking piece of furniture in your home, and practicing it with your duet partner are two different things.

“Oh, that’s good… um, I’ll start the music.”

Your name is followed by an exasperated sigh. With reluctance—because your phone’s home screen is just that interesting—you glance up from your phone, to see Gunwook eyeing you through the mirror. 

“Could we try to get through the routine? Maybe without you scratching me this time?” Gunwook gnaws at his bottom lip, sweat beading at his temple. He’s actually been hard at work, practicing while you sat in the corner of the room—essentially sentenced to a time-out after accidentally scratching Gunwook every time you tried to run through the routine with him. Accidentally.

You can’t help the frown that sets on your lips. Only to you, it seems, Gunwook Park is an enigma. When he first joined the team, he seemed nice, and he wasn’t much younger than you, you just never got the chance to properly talk to him. However, now you never want to speak to him, the fact that you have to work so closely with him is nauseating.

Tampering down all the ugly word vomit bubbling in your throat, you mentally repeat Hanbin’s words from yesterday to yourself, ‘You’re risking embarrassing the whole team’. Not only do you find most of your teammates to be more than bearable, but you also you can’t bomb a performance because you were too petty to practice the choreography, so, even though the thought of being so close to Gunwook—having to touch him makes you full body cringe, you suck it up.

“Sure.”

Begrudgingly, you get into position and wait for your cue. As the music starts up for what feels like the billionth time that evening, you miss the many nervous glances cast your way.

Succeedingly, you manage to not cause any more bodily harm, even when you have no choice but to get close enough to Gunwook to the point you cannot look anywhere but into his eyes. The urge to flee strikes, as unease among other odd emotions you will not address churn in your gut, but you deal with it (read: ignore it).

You manage to run through the routine once, then again, and again, and again, until your limbs feel like gelatin and you have no option but to sprawl out on the floor. It occurs to you how much you missed this feeling, you can barely believe you let your pettiness get in the way of it.

“Hey, can I ask you something?”

Turning your head to the side, there’s Gunwook, also sprawled out beside you. Huh, you don’t even have the negative energy within you to loathe his presence in the moment.

“You just did. But you can ask one more thing.”

A goofy grin splits Gunwook’s lips before he turns his head back to face the ceiling, expression shifting a little more seriously. “Did I… was there something that I like did? Or said to upset you?”

Oh. Right. So, you haven’t forgotten your distaste for Gunwook. You feel your good mood sour, as you scoff, and force yourself to finally sit up—your limbs are very much protesting, screaming at you, matter of fact, but fuck them. And fuck Gunwook Park. “Seriously?”

You glance over your shoulder, Gunwook, who sat up shortly after you, only blinks at you curiously, as though he hasn’t got a clue.

“You really don’t know? Do you just talk shit about everyone and that’s why you can’t seem to remember me?”

“What…?” Gunwook’s brows furrow, “What are you talking about?”

“I heard you." You push yourself up off the ground, fixing Gunwook with an exasperated look, "After our performance at orientation in August, you had a lot to say about my skill, and how ridiculous I looked.”

“I don't…?” You watch as the confusion and then the recognition passes over Gunwook’s features, “No, I—shit,” he hangs his head with a groan, which doesn’t serve to dissipate any of your arising confusion. “That wasn’t about you.”

“I heard you say my name, don’t bullshit me.”

“I—okay, I definitely said your name, but it seriously wasn’t about you. There was this, um, character in a film my roommate watched for some project; they were supposed to be a dancer, but they were godawful. I was talking about the character, and I didn’t even think about how they had the same name as you, or about how loudly I was talking about that.”

“Oh,” you say, rather intelligently. You consider the thought that he could be lying, but he looks at you with such earnestness, remorse practically pooling in his eyes, you can’t even entertain the thought for more than a moment.

“Yeah, oh. I’m sorry you thought I was talking about you…”

“No, I’m sorry,” you quietly sit back down, anger gone as quick as it arose, and flop back on the floor with a sigh. Having your entire view of Gunwook Park debunked in a mere minute was not on tonight’s bingo card.

“I should’ve—Hanbin kept telling me it was probably a misunderstanding and to confront you, but I just stewed in my misguided hatred. God, Hanbin’s going to be insufferable once I tell him he was right all along.”

Gunwook huffs a laugh, “I’m glad we sorted this out, finally. Um, I guess we should wrap up for tonight since it’s getting late. Can I walk you home?”

“Don’t you live on campus? You don’t have to walk me home if you just have to walk back here…”

“It’s fine!” Gunwook smiles, oddly enthusiastic. Weird, personally, you dread having to walk home after practice. “I want to, and I guess now we can get to know each other? Now that you don’t hate me.”

“Yeah… okay, I’ll grab my stuff.” You sit back up again, as much as you’d like to become one with the floor.

“Okay, cool.”

“Cool.” you can’t help but smile, seeing the wide grin on Gunwook’s face. You’re going to choose to believe the warmth in your cheeks is because you’re still cooling off from rehearsing.

The idea of rehearsing is a lot more palatable now that you don’t despise your duet partner. The actual rehearsals aren’t too bad either… they’re actually kind of enjoyable.

Hanbin was, in fact, very insufferable when you spilled everything that’d happened that day to him. He’d been waiting up for you, sitting on the armchair in your living room, and nearly gave you a heart attack when he flicked on the lamp beside him; like he was your mother and he’d caught you sneaking back in the house.

“Hey, how was class?” Gunwook has taken to waiting for you outside your classes on rehearsal days, you even say hi to each other when you see the other on campus, and maybe talk if you’re not busy.

“Don’t get me started…” you groan, “I have no idea what my professor was on about today, but I thought his jaw was going to unhinge before he finally stopped talking.”

Gunwook chuckles, and grabs your bag from you, cradling it to his chest. “I thought I told you I could carry my bag myself?”

“And I told you that you could try to take it back.” 

You did try, and you decided you do not like freakishly strong guys. “Whatever… what about you? How was your class?”

“Didn’t go today…” Gunwook trails off, glancing down at your linked arms. A habit after losing Hanbin in crowds one too many times. It feels nice with Gunwook, though. “Um, my roommate—” he clears his throat before he continues looking forward, revealing his red ears. Oh, that’s cute.

“He kept me up late ‘cause he needed help with his film project that he’s been procrastinating. I ended up waking up at like one-thirty…”

“Really? So, you just came straight here after waking up?” You tsk, choosing to look away from his pouted lips for your sake. “Did you even eat? Let’s stop by this café a few blocks away before we rehearse. It opened last month, Hanbin and I were supposed to check it out, but I think he forgot.”

You’re not blind, of course, Gunwook is, well, objectively attractive (subjectively as well, perchance). With much coaxing, you might’ve been able to admit it a week ago when you hated him. But, his attractiveness is far too illuminated when you’re a mere inches from his face; faced with his distractingly pretty brown eyes, and rosy cheeks. Oh God, he’s cute. He’s so fucking cute, and you are so fucking screwed.

Before you can say something so embarrassing you’d have to migrate to another country and assume another identity, you take the initiative to part from Gunwook, carefully backing away, and clearing your throat, “Should we take a break?”

Except that doesn’t even help, because when you sink to the floor to watch YouTube, Gunwook is beside you, smushed at your side to watch whatever you’re watching. You can’t even remember what video you tapped on, but apparently, you’re seven minutes into a video when Gunwook reaches over to pause it.

“Hey, um, one of my friends—his name’s Junhyeon, his frat, Zeta Rho Xi is having a party this weekend. He kinda roped me into going, and I was just wondering if you were free…? I would, um, it’d be cool if you could stop by.”

Parties haven’t been your thing for a long time; you tried to party freshman year, since people seemed to go on about the college parties. You just couldn’t get super into it, plus only things like the Play-Doh incident came from parties… and that’s why you’re not sure why you say, “Yeah, no, I should be free. I’ll check it out.”

You aren't even free, you have an essay you’ve written approximately two sentences for that happens to be due Monday. But the smile on Gunwook’s face makes agreeing feel like the right choice.

Immediately upon stepping inside, you remember why you hate parties. One, you lose Hanbin instantly. Two, trying to push through a bunch of sweaty, drunk people (who are surprisingly sturdy) is a pain in the ass. And three, it’s loud, you already feel like you need a drink. Or maybe three.

You manage to make it to a mostly empty kitchen, and at that point, you’ve lost any motivation to go search for Hanbin or even Gunwook. For the most part, you’ve given up caring about being ‘lame’, so, you’re perfectly content sitting in the kitchen on your phone at a party while sipping on possibly the worst quality beer you’ve tasted in your twenty years of life.

It’s maybe thirty minutes until you finally look up from your phone at the call of your name over the ear-damaging volume of music.

Hanbin stumbles into the kitchen, using Gunwook as support. You can make out your friend’s flushed cheeks, even in the dim lighting, you have no idea how he’s gotten drunk so fast. “There you are! I found Gunwookie, it looked like he was waitin’ around for you, ‘cause he was just in a corner lookin’ around… didn’t you guys exchange numbers?”

“I already told you I forgot to ask…” Gunwook mumbles.

“Oh,” Hanbin lets go of Gunwook to slide up beside you, “Hey, did you know that, um—” Gunwook rushes over to slap a hand over Hanbin’s mouth, are they both drunk? It’s more difficult to tell with Gunwook, his cheeks always look pink…

Hanbin removes Gunwook’s hand with a glare, “Don’t interrupt me,” he chides, as sternly as he can while drunk. “Anyway, ‘m so glad you two figured things out. I hope Gunwook tells you about his massive heart boner for you.”

Hanbin makes it probably ten times worse by continuing, “He’s—he’s had such a big crush on you since like, um, since like the millisecond he joined the team. But this whole time you thought he was mean to you, isn’t that silly?”

What isn’t silly is the look on Gunwook’s face, he looks positively mortified.

“...Okay, Bin, I think you’re ready to go home already,” you smile tersely, side-stepping the topic for now, maybe forever actually. “Gunwook, can you help me with him?” You ignore Hanbin’s slurred protests. It must take a moment for Gunwook to recoup before he’s at Hanbin’s other side, helping you pull the drunkard up.

You avoid looking in Gunwook’s direction, despite the fact you can feel him burning holes into the side of your head. Of course, there’s no avoiding the conversation—inevitably, you’re going to have to talk to Gunwook about what Hanbin said, but maybe you can get out of it tonight…?

It’s not that you’re particularly afraid… okay, well, you are, except it’s just unnecessary anxiety. Now you feel better about admitting to yourself that you’re interested in Gunwook. But what if Hanbin’s drunk rambling was just drunk rambling, and it was all nonsense? Well, Gunwook probably wouldn’t seem so nervous if that were the case, but maybe he’s nervous because he just doesn’t want you to be under the impression that he—

“Oh, hey, I’ve been looking everywhere for Hanbin…”

“Oh, Hao, hey.” you mentally thank Hao for unknowingly rescuing you from spiraling into your annoyingly irrational train of thought.

“Do you want me to take him off your hands? We were planning to ditch before he disappeared.”

Okay, time to put on your big person pants and be an adult. “Yeah, thanks.” Handing Hanbin off is pretty easy, the man completely unbothered that he’s thrown two of his protégés for a loop (he’ll probably feel a lot worse about it tomorrow, especially when he’s hungover). What’s less easy, is being left with Gunwook.

“Well, since Hanbin aired everything out…”

“Right, yeah. We should talk, maybe outside?”

Gunwook nods, leading the way to the back door, you follow closely behind him. As not to lose him in the clusters of people, and maybe just because you want to, you grab onto his arm.

Outside, your eardrums thank you for finally getting out of there, though your nervous heart is another story, rattling against your ribcage incessantly. Warily, you avoid looking at Gunwook, distancing yourself a good few feet away from him, “So…”

“I like you,” Gunwook blurts as if he won’t get another chance to say so, “like a lot. I initially joined the team ‘cause of you actually, I hadn’t even danced since middle school. But you were so—watching you on stage at orientation felt so… enchanting.”

Heat rushes to your cheeks at Gunwook’s flattery, and he only continues, “I thought you were perfect, so obviously I immediately signed up for the dance team, even though I wasn’t even sure if I was any good at it anymore, just so I could have an excuse to see you. Only for me to never gain the courage to even talk to you…” Staring at the wooden planks of the porch beneath your feet, you see Gunwook’s beaten-up Converse come into view, urging you to look up again.

“Gunwook, I—”

“It’s okay if you don’t feel anything like that for me, I just can’t let the what-ifs get in the way of me trying anymore.” Oh, how could you not feel something for him? Surely anyone could fall for him just by staring into his pretty brown eyes.

The weird feeling in your gut, which must be those butterflies people talk about, amplifies, you think you’d have to be a fool if you didn’t feel something for Gunwook Park. “I don’t… not feel something,” you hastily avert your gaze, “I guess I’m not entirely sure what it is, but I am interested in you. I, um, would be open to exploring that.”

“I understand—wait, you… really?”

You look up in time to see the overjoyed grin split Gunwook’s lips. It’s infectious, you can’t help but mirror his smile, laugh tumbling past your lips, “Yes, you dork. You better sweep me off my feet.”  You playfully shove at his shoulder.

“I will,” Gunwook grabs your wrist before you drop your arm, thumbing at the inside of it, “are you free tomorrow?”

“I…” You aren’t free, remember that pesky essay of yours? “Yeah, I am.” Oh, well, you suppose it can wait; likely until tomorrow night, when you finally open your laptop at eleven-thirty at night, when it happens to be due at midnight. You happen to work great under pressure!

“Perfect, can I pick you up at your place at two?”

“Sure, are you gonna remember to ask for my number this time, though?” You tease, making a ‘give me’ motion with your free hand.

Gunwook’s cheeks somehow get pinker, as he finally lets go of your wrist and retrieves his phone from his pocket, handing it over with the new contact screen open. Quickly, you type in your number and then your name, cheekily adding a heart beside it.

“Can I walk you home? Or, uh, if you wanted to go back to the party, that’s fine too…”

“Nah,” you’d rather do just about anything else than go back into that mess, you’ve had enough parties for the rest of your college life, “I’m pretty tired, and I have a super important date with a great guy tomorrow.”

With a coy smile to match Gunwook’s shy one, you cozy up to his side and link arms with him, “Let’s go?”

You’d still consider dancing to be a great way to unwind—still one of your favorites, it's just been demoted to second place.

Nothing ebbs away your stress like Gunwook popping into your room with your favorite food after you’ve been staring at your laptop screen for hours as if you were hoping your assignments would finish themselves. Or his hugs—always so warm, it’s like hugging an oversized stuffed bear. Or just… him.

Unrivaled after several years, dancing has finally met its match: Gunwook Park.

[dinitride-art]

Au fics that i think are neat and that i want to compile into a list because im trying to figure out how to comment on a chapter of a fic but i need time to sort out my thoughts (usually for fic recs i try to rec fics with less kudos/engagement because reasons but im just gonna throw everything in this list. probably multiple fics by the same author in the same universe because thats the one im trying to sort out my thoughts on.)

the strawberries are dying by eggowlss - historical fiction and very interesting character relationships and also character exploration within the time period. I really like this one because the pacing and tone are very gentle. There’s a srt of ebb and flow to the story that makes both the time period and the characters really fit into it. idk how to describe it i just like it a lot.

in the quiet of the night (acswy ao3 series) - they’re putting those characters in situations. It’s a very good time. 10/10 do recommend. If you haven't heard of this one though, it’s basically a modern au where everyone works at a summer camp and Mike and Will cause problems for themselves, each other, and usually everyone else around them. 

si vis amari, ama by perexcri - demons and angels and heaven and hell and its honestly just one hell of a story. like ive got vivid images in my head of scenes i imagined when reading this. 

you start to kiss (and the record skips) by eclipseadventure - this is a band au with a side of a secret relationship and im a sucker for secret relationships. a bit of drama/high stakes in here too which is always pretty fun. 

End Racism on the OTW! - you and me and the horrible teenaged ghost who keeps eviscerating himself in our apartment makes three by TheWrongKindOfPC - i am also a sucker for buzzfeed unsolved aus. buzzfeed unsolved, hauntings, ghosts, yknow the fun stuff. 

into the daylight by andiwriteordie - THIS IS NOT THE FIRST ONE, it’s just the first one that came up in my bookmarks. anyways, this is the second fic in a fantasy au series. The worldbuilding is really cool and there’s magic and history and politics and i like it a lot. the most recent chapter is spinning around in my mind.

the heartbreak prince by andiwriteordie - THIS IS THE FIRST ONE. 

beneath these boughs, my devotion blooms by perexcri - this is the fic that nearly killed me. i literally cant summarize it because im still recovering from what happened to me when i read it. Did i read it in april? Maybe. Listen, it had me asking questions about things i had never considered before. its 11k but im pretty sure it took me a good few hours to read because it made me think about it so much. again, ive got a bunch of visuals running through my head. its just... so much.

sweetheart, you're so cruel by perexcri - Mike’s in a band, Will’s a music snob, they’re both contemplating their life choices. very fun, very interesting, also made me think about some things. 

keep it hush by wiseatom - theres an amusement park and the horrors of customer service. and some other stuff but basically its pretty bright (the visuals of the fic in my head are bright- like sun glinting off metal- and idk how else to describe it)

the start of an age by delusionaltogether (Whyyyyy) - this ones funny and serious at times and its got Max in it. fantasy au with prince will and knight mike and a secret relationship and a small scheme between three parties that involves a fake (ish) marriage. 

superhero therapy by silverluminoqity - spiderman au with a side of trauma and healing? it’s complicated theres stuff happening, i had a good time reading it. 

you've got this spell on me by andiwriteordie - this one was really fun. basically its a fantasy au theres magic and mike gets himself hit with a spell that makes him fall in love with will and will freaks out about it for a while.

Daydream by disaster_energy - i really really liked this fic. its a fantasy au and its got gods and stuff and will gets chosen by the moon goddess because hes Will and everyone is like... woah.

takes one to know one by andiwriteordie - i also liked this one a lot, its a superhero au and its got ironic (like... dramatic irony- i think is what im talking about? maybe? but like fun irony) secret identities. 

Love goes 'round by evil_ontheinside - conversations in a laundry mat. mikes flopping (as in, flopping around like a fish) around a bit and this was pretty cute. 

my promise could be your fiend (could be the smallest of signs) by s0ld_it - spider man au, theres a bookstore involved and a lot of stuff. ive read this fic twice and greatly enjoyed it both times. 

Tip-toeing on Lily-pads by cherryisgone - very very fun, fantasy au and... mike gets cursed to be a frog. can only be un-cursed with a kiss. 

filling in the blanks as we go by delusionaltogether (Whyyyyy) - bookstore meetcute

there’s more but i spent all day painting my room and i am tired. Ive also got way too many bookmarks to go through and i have decided to stop here. still haven't figured out how to write that comment (but i am working on it because i love the fi(s) and ive been thinking about one specific thing that came up in a new chapter for so long). anyways, i hope someone enjoys this list of au fics from my bookmarks. 

[bluesidez]

OKAY I HAD TO HIT YOU W THIS BC I NEED THIS TO COME TRUE 🗣🗣‼️‼️

AcademicRival!Miguel x AcademicRival!reader

where they will do quite literally ANYTHING (legally) POSSIBLE to one up each other.

whether their petty rivalry began in high school or first year of uni/college, IDC- but they absolutely despise each other.

and!!! at some point down the track, they forgot why they were beefing in the first place, only for it to start stemming from a place of 'jealousy' (yk how sometimes jealousy is actually feelings of romantic interest in disguise,, yeah, that) and it gets to the point where they are quite literally making it all their friends' problem bc of it.

like i can imagine reader drinking something that Miguel sees and Miguel going 'i need to have this all the time and sell it out so reader can never have any' and Peter is like '???', or reader finding out Miguel got a certain mark and goes 'nobody speak to me for a month i have to understand everything about quantum physics before that smug asshole opens his mouth' and Jess is like '??? just kiss, fym??'

and then they finally have a moment where they have no choice but to rely on each other- whether Miguel's car breaks down on the side of the road reader happens to drive by and she takes him to his, or if reader desperately needs help in a situation and immediately calls him bc she knows he'll pick up bc she needs scary dog privileges and thats HIM so then they end up having a moment of reflection together with either super fluffy smut or absolute debauchery and fluffy aftercare i totally dont mind either way.

IDK do you know what i mean??? 🫣🫢🤭

anyway LY BLUE-BLUE, thank yew for letting me ramble on 🤍🩵

Are you asking me to write this? 🧐 (I shall add it to the pending ideas list just for you 🐰🩵)

I wrote that as a reply as soon as you sent it, but now I have more ideas that I wanna yap about to go along with this.

SO!! You already have a rivals, enemies to lovers trope going on. What better way to make it even more fun than to add the stoic x chatty dynamic???

Like I’m imagining the reader and Miguel first meeting in middle or high school. He’s a transfer student that’s immediately making the top grades and people are like where tf did he come from?? Reader doesn’t really think anything of it, she just carries on with her school life, chatting away (and getting in on the gossip about Miguel).

It’s not until he ends up in the same class with reader one semester (probably in high school) that reader is finally able to be in close contact with him. He’s so quiet and a little boring, but there’s always random girls coming in and out of the classroom to attempt to chat to him.

They’re always bringing snacks or sweets for him. He always turns them down with a “No thank you. I don’t like chocolate.” type of response. (What he thinks to be polite and cordial)

The guys in the class think he’s a huge jerk. The girls in the class still fond over him. You think he’s an oddball, a weirdo. But you really have no solid information to justify it.

It’s not until one day that the teacher asks this obscure question that he pisses you off. (I havent thought of a weird question yet tho). Everyone else has given crude or stupid answers, riling each other up and joking. You raise your head to give the most out-of-the-box, yet plausible answer that leaves the teacher impressed and the class laughing in shock. Miguel scoffs and debunks it so fast, that you start to feel like one of his rejected groupies. If you thought the laughter for your answer was loud, the laughter for his sounds like the crowd in a football stadium.

You’re embarrassed but you don’t really show it. You just brush it off and joke with everyone else like usual.

Then, one of the class’s first huge tests come. You’re gunning for the number 1 spot although you figure it won’t be too hard with half of the room being class clowns and the other half not giving af. You read over the material once and already have a good grasp on it, so you joke around with everyone else. There’s rap battles and TT routines. You guys even manage to get the teacher in on some of them. From the front of the room, you can see Miguel glancing back at you with such a sour look on his face. Wtf was his deal??

Test day finally comes. You’re the first to turn yours in with a smug smile on your face. You even take a nap until the next bell.

You’re on cloud nine for about a good week. Although, every time you open your mouth in class, Miguel looks like he woke up on the wrong side of the bed.

Then, the time came for the teacher to hand out the papers. He was pretty theatrical and loved to announce who got the highest score.

You were gearing up for him to say your name. And you don’t know of you’re crazy, but you’re certain your mom didn’t put “Miguel O’Hara” on your school registration form.

You frown as you come back to reality, watching as teacher handed him is paper. From your seat, you can see the bright red 100 in the corner, a smiley face to adorn it.

Then the teacher hands you your paper. A 99.5. Just 0.5 points from a perfect score. And what you got points taken off for is something so ridiculous that you could scream.

You can see him in your peripheral as you chat with the other students about the answers. Just as you discuss your silly mistake you take a small look at him. He has a faint smirk on his face, as if to laugh at your downfall.

From then on, you decide that it’s a war.

[and obviously, the story would travel with them as they grow. Once they’re adults, I can imagine Miguel to still be this same stoic, yet more approachable person who has had a ROSTER of hookups and a reader who’s still so flirty and chatty, yet can’t find a good partner to save their life. The dynamic of him knowing exactly how to make reader feel good verses reader being overwhelmed for once would be sooooo good]

What do you think Lexie-bun?? 🥸

[just-jordie-things]

idk if your requests are open so i’m sorry if they’re not :( but i really really need some comfort rn so if it’s not to hard could you write jjk men comforting reader who’s just had an all around shitty day? idc who else is in it, but i really like yuta and megumi:)) -🌿

I'm always down for some blurbs! hope it gives ya some comfort nonnie <3

OKKOTSU YUUTA

okkotsu finds you sitting alone during your free period. at first very excited to approach you and ask to join, because he rarely got to spend one on one time with you. you mostly only spent time together as a group with the other second years, so this could finally be his chance to, i don't know, woo you?

but upon nearing you, he realizes that you're quietly crying to yourself, and now his excitement is replaced with concern.

"(y/n)?"

as soon as you noticed him there, you're quick to wipe your tears and plaster on a friendly smile.

"oh- hi," you chuckle nervously, and hope he hadn't seen you crying for the last ten minutes. "sorry, i didn't see you there"

"are you okay?" he asks, sitting beside you and staring at you in a way that made you embarrassed to have been caught.

"yeah, i just- yeah," you stammer, unsure of what to say, as you didn't want to bother him. "don't worry about it, i'm fine" you decide, giving him another smile that he could see right through.

"you're crying," yuuta frowns. "do you want to talk about it?"

your mouth opens, and then closes, still unsure if you should dump your issues onto him. you weren't usually one to vent to your friends, everyone had their own problems going on, it was just the way of life in this society, but yuuta seemed so genuinely concerned it would make your heart hurt to turn him away.

"you sure?" you ask quietly.

he laughs, genuinely laughs, with a smile and crinkled eyes, like you'd just told a silly joke and hadn't asked for his consent to vent your issues. you seem confused by this, which only makes him continue to chuckle as her speaks.

"of course i'm sure," he says, reaching out to brush away a stray tear you'd missed. your cheeks heat up. "we're friends, right? friends talk to each other when they're upset,"

the way your heart skipped a beat at his mere concern for your feelings didn't seem like he was just a friend to you, but you decided you could circle back to that later.

"or, if you'd rather, we could go on a snack run and watch a movie, if you just want to forget about it" he offered politely.

this time, you gave him a real smile, and it finally felt like you weren't going to burst into tears again.

"we could do both?" you suggested quietly, and yuuta grinned ear to ear. ___

FUSHIGURO MEGUMI

you weren't sure how long you'd been crying, but it was long enough that it was no longer just a cry, but definitely a full on breakdown.

which, you were a person in tune with your emotions, so when you felt like you needed to let it all out in a healthy way, you would.

but today wasn't one of those days. today was a terrible day. and it had come out of nowhere. so instead of doing any of your homework or anything to distract your mind, you'd collapsed into bed and let your emotions completely engulf you.

it's not until your phone is ringing that you even wonder how long you'd been smearing wet makeup into your pillows.

you want to take the thing and chuck it against the wall, silencing it forever, but when you see it's megumi calling you go against your better judgement.

megumi was a solid texter, like most of your generation, he hated phone calls. he would actively decline calls just to text the caller and ask what it was they needed, firmly believing there was nothing you could say in a call that couldn't be texted.

so seeing his name lighting up your screen, you figured it must have been important. sniffling and clearing your throat to hide your strained voice, you answered.

"hey, 'gumi"

"hey sweetheart," he greets, and you can hear his smile through the phone, somehow. it brightens your mood in the slightest. "you still studyin'?"

"uh," you pause, glancing over to your bag of textbooks that sat on your floor, unmoved from when you'd thrown it to the ground before falling into bed. "no"

despite you trying your best to mask your emotions, your voice cracks on the single word, and megumi being who he is, picks up on it right away.

"you alright?" he asks without missing a beat.

in the two years he'd known you, he'd never heard or seen you cry. not even after everything you'd been through together. so hearing your voice strain and crack lights up an instinct in him to protect. to fix.

"yeah, sorry," you clear your throat, hoping to feign ignorance, as though your mouth had just played a trick on you and made ou fumble your words. "what were you calling for-?"

"sounds like you've been crying," megumi cuts off the bullshit and questions her again. "what's goin' on? did something happen?"

your eyes betray you, welling with tears as megumi's concern for your well being becomes evident.

"it's nothing, i'm fine"

"you're a terrible liar, sweetheart," megumi sighs, and so do you. "what happened?"

you fall back onto your bed again, biting your lip to keep any other broken sounds from escaping you.

"nothing, really," you say through a heavy breath. "don't worry 'bout it"

just as you start to melt into the comfort of your blankets, there's a knock on your door. you lift your head at the sound, but then choose to ignore it.

"don't worry about it?" megumi repeats with a small scoff. "course i'm gonna worry about it. did someone say something? do something?"

tears prick at the corners of your eyes, threatening to send you into another sobbing fit.

"don't wanna bother you" you mumble out your lame excuse. megumi scoffs again on the other end of the line.

another knock sounds at your door.

"you could never bother me, sweetheart," he says honestly.

your heart melts at how sweet he could sound sometimes. you wonder if he even knows that he's talking like a romantic, or if that's just how he's grown to speak to you.

"now come get the door, i look like an idiot out here"

you're quick to sit up again, sliding off the bed and crossing the room to slide your door open.

sure enough, there's megumi, with his phone to his ear and a small smile on his face. he ends your call and tucks his phone into his pocket, before reaching his arms out and pulling you into him.

you practically crash into his chest, clinging to the back of his shirt as the tears pool in your eyes again. he just stands there, hugging you comfortingly and letting you cry for a few minutes. but he's the first to break the silence.

"figured you weren't doin' too well," he mumbles, resting his cheek against your head as his hand rubs circles on your back. "didn't text me all day, thought you were mad at me or somethin'"

"no," you mumbles, shaking your head against his chest. "I'm not mad at you. i just... i just had the shittiest day"

he hums, hugging you tighter.

"well, I'm here now," he says, and he doesn't know it, but it was the most comforting thing he could've told you.

well, he might've figured it out when you hold onto him even tighter, but he doesn't realize right away why that was significant to you.

"wanna talk about it?"

you look up at him, in all of your teary eyed, runny mascara glory. despite the pang of concern, he smiles at you, bringing a hand away from your back to wipe some of the black stains away from your cheeks.

you nod a little back at him.

"in bed?" you sniffle, and he nods, finally stepping into your room and sliding your door shut behind him.

"so you can fall asleep on me?" he asks.

your hand finds his and the action makes his face go hot, but he squeezes your palm reassuringly.

you nod again in answer to his question, already pulling back the blankets with your free hand so you could both climb under and end a terrible day on a good note. ___

GOJO SATORU

if this man ever finds you in a bad mood, prepare for the ultimate goddess treatment.

first, he's all over you, holding you, wiping away/kissing away your tears, but letting you get it all out. will probably pull you into his lap and rock you. early on in the relationship this might have felt infantilizing, but as time goes on it's just so comforting that you'll find yourself crawling into his lap to be cradled.

once you've got the tears out of your system, he let's you vent. and really vent, too. he'll hang onto every word as you explain the misfortune you'd encountered that day, always taking your side. if you had a fight with someone, he's shit talking them. if someone's hurt your feelings, he's shit talking them.

god forbid you've been physically hurt, because he'll teleport away and back in a matter of seconds with someone else's blood on his knuckles without question.

after you've talked through the whole situation, he's onto step three. which is fix the day! this usually includes sweets, a warm bubble bath, and then a prolonged period of cuddle time. sometimes on the couch while binging your new favorite show, and sometimes in a comfortable silence in bed. no matter where it is, expect satoru to get anything you might need. water? wine? a snack? a comfy pair of pajamas? he's up and at it before you could even think of getting up for it.

gojo satoru is already a whipped romantic, but expect ten times more praise and flirty comments after a bad day. it would almost be annoying, if he wasn't so genuine about his sweetness. you swear it's all the sugar in his system. (seriously, he'll remind you how much he loves you every two minutes. if he had control over what he said in his sleep, you were sure he'd keep at it even through the night)

even the next day you get a special breakfast and your favorite drink waiting for you when you wake up. he can't cook to save his life it definitely came from your favorite restaurant ten minutes prior <3 ___

INUMAKI TOGE

toge finding you crying only makes you want to cry more, to be honest.

you thought you'd be in the clear turning down an empty corridor when the tears finally came on. you'd been keeping them down all day, which had taken quite a lot of energy. so when they crept up on you and burned your throat, you knew you'd have to duck somewhere to quickly collect yourself before anyone could see.

unfortunately for you, the day's events wouldn't stop replaying in your mind as you wiped your eyes repeatedly, the tears were nonstop. now you were sliding down to the floor, holding your face in your hands as you sobbed quietly.

and much less to your liking, you could hear footsteps approaching. at a regular rate at first, before picking up speed and now rushing towards you.

looking up, you found a very worried looking toge kneeling before you. you wanted to tell him to go away, but he was already unzipping his collar and asking you if you were alright... in his own way.

"mustard leaf!?" it comes out panicked, afraid that he was the worst person to find you like this.

if you were having a panic attack, he feared he wouldn't be capable of helping you out of it. his cursed speech really was that sometimes, cursed.

"i- i'm fine," you hiccuped over your words.

the waterworks pouring out of your face told him the truth, and toge furrowed his brows, frowning deeply.

"jus' a bad day," you whimpered. "really, you c-can go," you hope he'll listen, and leave you be to cry over your humiliation. "i don't want you to s-see me like this"

toge shakes his head, trying to find a way to communicate what little he could that he'd never leave you here like this.

he reaches out to you, cupping your face in his hands, stroking his thumbs over your skin to wipe away the tears. the action catches you so off guard that you find yourself holding your breath. this effectively helps you to calm down and the tears eventually stop falling.

you're still a little embarrassed, but when you look at toge, he doesn't seem to pity you or mock you at all. he seems completely worried over you, his brows drawn in a knot, his own eyes glossy, he's even chewing on his lip.

he cared about you this much?

"thanks, toge" you say once you've caught your breath again, and your throat doesn't feel as strained.

he nods back at you, pinching your cheek softly, affectionately. he offers you a sweet smile, before sticking his tongue out. you give him a wobbly smile in return.

when you seem to be feeling better, he drops his hands, only to hold your shoulders and pull you forward so that he can hug you. you're stunned at first, but cave into it, wrapping your arms around his neck and clinging on, soaking up all the comfort you could get.

"i needed this" you sigh, shutting your eyes and melt into him further.

toge squeezes you back tighter. ___

don't forget to give yourself time to cry and heal lovelies <3 xoxo ~ jordie

[nixthelapin]

A Jekyll&Hyde type akuma whose power is to bring out a hidden or repressed part of your personality (but like, making two of you instead of switching in one body), and when Chat gets hit suddenly there’s both “normal” Chat (I’ll get to that in a sec) and Cat Walker/Patte de Velours at the same time.

(Cue Ladybug freaking out upon learning they’re the same person)

“Normal” Chat looks the same, but is just a bit more intense (since this is Adrien’s way of “letting loose” to not be how he is as a civilian, he’s not too different, but because of the split he does lose some usual traits). I.e. *heavily* flirting with LB, going at it with the puns, more agressive and impulsive with the akuma, doesnt like following orders (especially with the remaining feelings of anger towards the partnership being put further into question as LB prefers CW), heart on his sleeve

Cat Walker is also not super different to the episode he was in, but is also more intense thanks to the akuma: all business- no nonsense, doesn’t laugh at jokes (even in a “I’ll laugh if you want” way, like in Kuroneko), cordial to LB, follows LB’s orders to a T (to the point of not making his own decisions in battle), calm and collected (almost emotionless, even with that plastered smile)

CN starts to hate CW as the fight goes on, because LB seems to prefer him (and she’s understandably getting annoyed with CN’s impulsivity). CN gets territorial, saying that he’s LB’s partner. CW: “then why did she replace you with me?” (Man, look at all the self hatred in Adrien’s psyche!)

So CN runs off and leaves them alone to fight the akuma. This ticks LB off even more, but she has an akuma to deal with- and she has CW- so she lets him go.

As the fight goes on, some of the same issues from Kuroneko occur, so she also gets frustrated with CW too.

Since he’s acting more extreme than normal (more like someone awaiting orders than a partner due to the Jekyll&Hyde thing), it causes more problems (like him waiting for her decisions leaving openings where he could’ve done something proactive)

She actually blows up at him, asking why he didn’t do anything (“I was waiting for you to tell me the plan!”), and she says he should be able to think on his own, he doesn’t need her to tell him everything, but- “I thought I was just being what you wanted.”

(He’s shocked and genuinely hurt- though it’s still pretty quiet emotion, subdued and apologetic)

And that’s when it clicks for her what becoming CW was back in Kuroneko. He was molding himself for her. And this version of CW is even more of that. She realizes just how much CN suppresses, not just for her, but for everyone- why else would this be a major aspect of his personality?

(Also, Patte de Velours? Velvet Paw? That’s basically saying he’s been declawed. Yikes.)

She makes CN get his butt back to the fight (or she finds him- he may have been doing something while away like talking with someone, maybe Alya or Nino, or Luka). CN and CW argue more, with insults. Then she goes on a whole rant/lecture to them about how important they both are, both to her and to each other, how they are one person, and their traits are both important, but each extreme is not great. Ex: instinct/impulse and service/obedience (the key is self control, so that your emotions aren’t controlling you, but neither is another person). He is allowed to be both! Neither personality is bad, and hating one is just hating himself- he can’t just reject a fundamental part of himself.

She makes them agree to work together to defeat the akuma. It’s awkward at first, but they get a rhythm by seeing where each one is needed in the plan (LB does still do that, but how they follow is more fluid now). Two cataclysms now! Yay! (Maybe they used their powers already and have to de transform, and they see themselves as Adrien- the same one, not different, and it gets through their skulls. Idk I’m spitballing).

They have a quick talk between the two about accepting each other, it won’t be easy, I’m nervous, we’ll be okay (“yeah, I think we will :)”), etc.

Ends with them combining back with the ladybug cure. Surprise! His outfit is combined too! (Honestly, I just want the ponytail with the fluffy hair)

LB and CN have a talk after recharging about everything. CN apologizes for lying about CW and explains why and how he did it. LB didn’t realize how much he hid. She never meant for him to change or hate parts of himself. He thought she didn’t like the CN parts of him, but LB promises that isn’t true. She admits she did get… annoyed, but never hate! She loves both sides of him. Besides, CW didn’t work out that first time, remember? (Though she very much leaves out her intense crushing being the deciding factor there)

CN admits he feels more, well, not whole, exactly, he’s actually still pretty uncertain about what all this means for “who he is,” but… he can at least say he feels less like he has to perform all the time. He loves being Chat Noir, but he is exaggerating a bit when he transforms, in part to be not like his civilian life. He tells her he’s not like that as a civilian, but he’s also not like Cat Walker. But he’s not really sure who “he” is yet. (What I’m getting at is Oblivio!Adrien- dorky, but not over the top, in love, trusts his lady to make the plan, but is still proactive, etc.)

LB says that’s okay, he doesn’t have to figure it out right away. But she’ll be there to help him figure it out.

END

[iheardarumorthings]

HEY BESTIE CAN U MAKE A BLURB OR SOMETHING ABOUT FIVE HARGREEVES DURING THE FIRST EP OF S3 like yk the one where he saw delores after jayme spits on him and the reader who happens to date him saw it and like "wtf is he doing" and heard the name delores coming out of his mouth and the reader just goes silence after that scene BECAUSE THE READER IS THINKING ABOUT IT A LOT LIKE "is he actually still in love with a mannequin" and like very angsty afterwards but Five confronted her why she's being so quiet after their visit at the sparrows and the rest is up to u :] TYSM IDK ITS MY 1ST REQUEST ACTUALLY AND I CANTTT STOP THINKING ABT S3

ANGSTANGSTANGST

warnings: i think there's swearing, female reader (in my mind, but i can't remember using pronouns), angst. hardcore angst

tags: @mad-elia

PERFECTION

You were both running to get to Allison, his arm was around your waist, the other arm stretched toward the cornered woman. 

“Thanks,” she heaved once the three of you made it to the upstairs. 

“No problem,” Five said.

And then you saw her. She was a taller woman with electric black hair and green eyes. 

He told you guys to go, that he’d handle the woman. While Allison ran, you lingered, hiding behind the wall, watching.

He hit her over the head and she let out a groan of pain. Good. He could handle anything, your boyfriend. You had no doubt he’d be able to handle this easily; after all, he was probably the quickest thinker out of everyone. He could do anything and everything and that was only one reason you were irretrievably, desperately in love with the man.

And then came the spit, along with a hiss bubbling from the woman’s mouth. Jayme, you think her name was. Jayme. It sounded about right.

You wrinkled your nose, much like Five who began to berate her. “Agh! Hey, gross, alright?”

But before he could continue the usual lecture about sanitation, his face went glassy. Sweat built up on his forehead, and he began to walk around almost aimlessly.

“What the hell?” you heard him whisper. His eyes were directed toward the stairs, as were Jayme’s.

You ran out, looking at him, but didn’t touch him. Disturbing people when they’re in a trance could end dangerously, you heard. 

“What did you do to him?” you whispered, but she heard it and only smiled. It wasn’t one of those soft smiles; it was something similar to Five’s smile when he was irked. It was crooked, fake.

“I’m only showing him what he wants, kid.”

“Dolores?” Five whispered. You could feel your heart shatter.

The mannequin; that mannequin that sat with the both of you through the darkest nights of the apocalypse. She was there through everything; he always seemed to choose her over you. Even after you two were together. Dolores this; Dolores that; “Dolores would look good in this, wouldn’t she?”; “Dolores, you’re perfect”; “Dolores, I love you”.

You thought it was over. You thought he was over the stupid mannequin; you thought he loved you, only you. You thought that you two were meant for one another, the stupid soulmate shit everyone preached. But, you could see now, you clung on too tightly to the dreams a little girl would have.

You could see him break out into a smile, a genuine one. “Dolores.”

And then came the italian. 

“Really? Italian? Holy shit. Do you think I could get out of this without fighting you?” you asked Jayme. She raised an eyebrow at you before quickly turning to Five. “I’m way to tired for-”

He began to make out with thin air. 

Well, fuck.

“Okay, I’m just going to go,” you said, holding back the tears that threatened to spill.

You only just turned your back when you heard Five tumble down the stairs.

~*~

“Just gonna sit. I’m just gonna sit for a minute,” Luther groaned.

Your bones were cracking. You could practically collapse right there, plopping down on the top of the bench, lying there, mimicking Klaus on the table next to yours.

“Oh, I’m cracking,” Klaus said, a grit to his voice. You could second that.

“You all good, Klaus?”

“Fine, (Y/N/N), you?”

“Could be better.”

Five climbed on top of the table, sitting on the edge and placing your head gently in his lap. He began to run his fingers through your hair, his rhythm was constant. His love wasn’t. He grazed a cut and you hissed.

“That’s one hell of a cut, Sweetheart,” he mused quietly. You used that as an excuse to get out of his lap.

“I’m fine.”

You could see him flinch- just barely, not enough to catch if you weren’t paying close attention- at the slight harshness in your tone.

Good.

~*~

“CHET! Mon frère! I’d like my usual suite, por favor!” Klaus announced excitedly to the man at the front desk. He was older, his wrinkles prominent, but his hair still maintaining a blondish color that grasped onto hints of youth. 

“I’ve never seen you before,” Chet deadpanned. 

“See? Told you. Discreet.”

“Great job, Klaus,” you giggled; in turn, he wrapped an arm around you and wrestled you into his side.

“Don’t sass me, kiddo. There is such thing as a time out corner, you know.”

The dog’s whimper interrupted the conversation very quickly. 

“Please stop scaring my dog,” Chet said.

“We need some rooms, please.”

“Super.” Chet pulled out a sign with the words only a nightmare could hold. “And how will we be paying today?”

Well shit.

“Fine,” Luther said. “Empty your pockets. Come on; something.”

You dug around in your pockets, finding a dagger and an extinguished cigarette. 

“(Y/N)! Come on, really?” Five scolded.

“As if you haven’t had a cigar before.”

“Condoms?” Luther asked.

“I think you can exchange those for cash,” Klaus replied, causing you to giggle.

“Come on, you two, put the knives away!”

Luther looked around. “Oh, all right,” he sighed, removing his watch. Klaus marveled at it as he handed it to Chet. Examining it, Chet grabbed three room keys.

“Well, let’s Brady Bunch this bitch.”

~*~

Only one room had one bed, so you and Five were assigned to that one.

“Let’s unpack. Settle in.”

“And what do we have to unpack?” you questioned, eyebrow cocked.

“Yes, Darling, isn’t that liberating?”

“Fair enough.”

“Alright then,” Five said. “Let’s fix you up.”

“What do you mean?” you asked.

You didn’t want him touching you anymore. You didn’t want him lying to you anymore.

“You know what I mean.”

“Fine. I’ll get Allison in here-”

“Why Allison?” he asked, eyebrows furling. You could see the hurt flash in his eyes. Your heart broke and soared at the same time.

“You know why, Five. I saw everything.”

“Everything? I don’t get it.” He approached you, reaching out. You pulled back. He took another step forward. This kept going until your back hit the wall. He quickly brought his arm up, trapping you there. “I don’t understand. Why can’t I take- what did you see?”

You laughed, but stared at his arm. He was serious.

His other hand made its way to your hairline, brushing it softly. “I don’t understand.”

You recoiled, causing him to flinch once more.

“Sweetheart, we’re done. It’s all over; no more apocalypse, no more nothing. This is it! We can be happy- just… tell me what happened. I’ll fix it. I swear I will. I can’t afford to lose you after everything. I’ll fix everything, I promise, just please tell me what-”

“I saw you making out with thin air.”

“After what Jayme did? I thought I told you to run-”

“I hung back to make sure there wasn’t any funny business.” His arm loosened and you made your exit, walking toward the door. He didn’t jump toward you. He didn’t do anything. He just looked. “Turns out, there was some funny business. You’re still hung up on Dolores.”

“No,” he whispered. “No, (Y/N), I swear to God, I-”

“I heard everything, Five. So, we’re hanging out here for the next few days and then I’m out. I’m sorry. I can’t do this anymore.”

“(Y/N), I love you. Not Dolores, you.”

“I have come second to her after years, Five. Years I have waited for you to come around, and when you finally did, I was stupid enough to believe it was true. I was foolish enough to believe you could actually love me, that someone would actually love me. But, of course, I should’ve known: you can’t get over something so perfect that quickly.”

“You are perfection,” he whispered, tears in his eyes. “You-”

“No, Five. You can’t- I know what I saw. I know what you want, and that’s not me. Now, if you excuse me, Allison will only be available for so long. I’m going to need this cut fixed.”

You walked out the door with tears blurring your vision.

[rjunswrld]

crush culture (i got a burning desire for you baby.)

jaehyun x thick POC reader

fingering, praising, hand kink, office sex, slight possessive jaehyun, light usage of petnames, reader and jaehyun are v into each other lowkey (or highkey idk they’re both crazy), jaehyun is a big helper such a gentleman fr

there was no denying it, you had a crush on your secretary jeong jaehyun. but who didn’t? he was the talk of the work space for months since he started. everyone wanted to get their hands on the overly flirtatious 5’ 11” aquarius man flashing his famous little smile that made his dimples even more prominent to the eye. a fresh face around the office was something new, especially when they look like jaehyun which made you surprised that a man like him would want to work for you soon finding out that he was recommended this job by one of his good friends on the third floor, nakamoto yuta.

jaehyun was new to this part of town, renting out an apartment a few blocks away he was desperate for any job he could get his hands on and when yuta brought up a position at his job that recently opened up, jaehyun couldn’t be any more excited to take it on.

and since then you’ve grown accustomed to him and that small infatuation.

it was annoying that you had a yearning for him, everything about him was so daring and stupidly attractive. his stupid compliments on you attire, your hairstyle, your work ethic, the list goes on.. that burning feeling on your cheeks became a daily reminder that jaehyun just had to open his big mouth and praise you. it wasn’t that you didn’t like it, you were shy! i mean who can blame you?

tonight you were slammed with work, stressing the fuck out more than usual. time flew by quickly that you missed the view of the sun setting behind you in your office, your eyes glued on multiple files and paperwork that went go through you first for approval you swore you had blisters on your fingers at this point.

hearing small taps on your door before opening up slightly, you looked up at the male who greeted you with a small whisper trying not to inconvenience your time and distract you. too late.

he approached your desk with more files in his hands, apologizing softly as he placed them off to the side away from the others to keep them from getting mixed up and causing any problems. a man with a brain. he smiled down at you in pity, all the work he was assigned was here and his job was about done for the day.. but you were still here, your whole floor has gone home for the night. how could he leave knowing you’d be here all alone?

“anything else i can help you with ms. ___?”

his voice was smooth like honey, snapping you back to reality as you realized you had zoned out. clearing your throat you looked at the time, 10:30pm. god it’s gonna be a long night for you. “that’s all for today, thank you for bringing these to me.” you politely smiled as he looked at you with an expression you couldn’t read. what was he thinking? “well, i guess i should be on my way then.” he chewed on his bottom lip hoping you’d ask for him to stay. please let him stay.

“yeah i guess so, it’s pretty late too. don’t worry your overtime will be counted on your check.” you confirmed with a small giggle as he smiled, but that’s not what mattered to him right now. “goodnight jaehyun.” looking away from the man he couldn’t peel his eyes off of you. can’t you see he doesn’t want to leave? wasn’t it obvious by the way he took his time bringing you the rest of of his work just to be here with you alone? “right. goodnight ms. ___.” he playfully said, sighing as he turned around slowly, practically dragging himself from his spot to walk towards the door. won’t you stop him? holy shit ___ say something to make him stay.

you watched his figure slowly depart from you, he was the last person besides you here left. once he’s gone there’s no company, no one to talk to, no one to walk out with. would it be too much to have him stay? just for protection of course.. yeah definitely just to keep you safe..

“um jaehyun?” he turned around faster than ever, faster than you could say go. “yes?” he smiled brightly as you couldn’t help but smile genuinely at him. “i know it’s too much to ask and you can say no-“ “yes.” he was quick to say making you raise your brows unexpectedly. “you didn’t even let me finish.”

“you want me to stay and my answer is yes, i’ll stay.”

walking over to one of the chairs placed in front of your desk he was quick to take a seat, smiling at you with those stupid dimples you felt your heart skip a beat. pull it together girl. “you don’t have to stay all night, feel free to leave whenever.” you added as he dismissed you, smacking his lips with his hand swaying in a motion like he was swatting a fly away. “i leave when you do.” you rolled your eyes playfully as he pulled his phone out, making himself comfortable in the seat you looked down at your papers mentally slamming your head against the table as you saw the many stacks layered around you.

but these many papers plus jaehyun here to keep you company? take your time then.

an hour passed

only one fucking hour and you felt your brain rotting at this point.

you looked up at jaehyun. watching how focused he was on his phone, rotating it with both hands holding onto the device you couldn’t stop your mind from whirling.

you tried to get rid of all the thoughts of your secretaries hands, god how attractive they are. so long and slender, he was just made so perfectly. your mind can only take so much before being completely fried, so why not take a break and focus on something else?

you kept your crush on him a secret, no one knew you fan girled over him like all the other girls on the floor did.. he kept you up at night, letting him consume you as you’d shove your hands down your panties with only his name falling past your lips uncontrollably. him teasingly smiling above you as you fingered yourself ruthlessly, fuck he gets you going. the sinful thoughts of his hands roaming your body, being forced into your mouth as you cry and gag around them, feeling his hands slap against your skin harshly-

"is everything alright boss?" damn that silly title he’d call you as a small joke knowing you hated being addressed by it, especially by him. but to him, that’s what you were. she’s the boss, she’s in charge and he’ll do whatever you say.

“huh?” you blinked your thoughts away as you felt your cheeks heat up against your will. fuck. your eyes met his, smiling at you he placed his phone down before shifting in his seat. you’re so cute when your flustered. “i asked if everything was okay?” he chuckled he swore he saw your cheeks go a shade darker, he loved seeing you blush uncontrollably so of course he’ll do anything in his power to do so. “you seem.. tense, maybe you should take a break?” he suggested, take it as you will, jaehyun is observant he can see right through you.

you cleared your throat looking at your paper as if you were focused on it to begin with. “uh sure, a break sounds nice..” a break from that uncomfortable feeling between your thighs would be even nicer, just a thought. “want me to help you out?” you choked on your saliva, was jaehyun a mind reader now? no way in hell did he just say that. “are you okay?” he was alert, but he was aware. so we’re on the same page then? sneaky. he got up reaching for a water bottle in your mini fridge off to the side of your desk, handing it over to you as you thanked him through your coughing fit. he stood next to you as you opened the bottle to drink, feeling the cold water running down your hot body he watched you gulp it all down. who knew watching you drink water would be so attractive. “better?” he snickered, fuck off jaehyun.

“y-yeah, sorry.” you mumbled an apology as you twisted the cap back on as you placed the bottle down before looking back at jaehyun who towered over you. his signature cologne filling your nostrils you felt like this was torture. “you didn’t answer my question boss.” as if his voice could go any deeper, he stared down at you. nothing could take his attention away from you. “what question?” you felt small under his gaze, you felt as if you were exposed to him. like a cop and a robber and you just got caught red handed. “i asked if you wanted me to help you out? you take on so much, i can help you relax.” every word was spoken loud and clear, was this a test? “how?” the million dollar question has been asked. “well i’m really good with my hands, i can show you.” he smirked walking behind you as he placed his hands on your shoulders gently, well fuck your mind for being so deep in the gutter. “is this okay?” with an experimental rub on your shoulders and neck you hummed back instantly in delight. “yes.” you sighed out, letting your eyes close awaiting for more. “just relax boss, lemme help you relax.”

his words were doing damage to you, and his hands just made it all better. you weren’t aware of his lingering eyes, staring down from above, looking down at your plush thighs as your skirt squeezed them so perfectly. he was a fan of you and your body. those prominent curves, the way your hips swayed so hypnotically as he watched you walk away from his desk, that pretty smell produced from your perfume that he wished to smell more of- but not from the bottle, from your skin specifically. he was such a pervert he couldn’t help but watch your skin cascade with goosebumps as your pretty little sounds of satisfaction escaped you. “poor ___, just wanna relax.. wanna be taken care of..” he mumbled out making you nod as his hands inched lower down your chest, his fingers dancing along your clavicle as you moaned softly. you were in a trance.

“so tense.. should i loosen you up more?” his words fell past his lips so easily, he didn’t have to think of anything to know what he was gonna say to you, he knew exactly what to say to you. “jaehyun..” you sighed out feeling his hands reach lower resting above your chest, so close to you just how you imagined them being. “will you let me help you?” opening your eyes you looked down at your chest seeing his fingers up close and personal contrasting against your melanin skin, this is so unprofessional of the both of you. in your office after hours with your secretary’s hands on your body, this would look extremely bad to anyone who walked in.

but no ones here.

just you and jaehyun.

“j-jaehyun..” you were flustered once again, subconsciously looking back at the male who never looked so serious before, his eyes seemingly darker than before- is this what lust looked like? temptation? “come on baby, i’ll do anything for you. tell me i can an i will.. i know it’s what you want.” baby?, could you get used to such a word coming from jaehyun specifically being addressed to you? leaning down closer to your face, you never been this close to him before. your imagination could never top this. “don’t you want me___?” looking down at his lips as he spoke such enticing words you felt completely speechless, so dumb with no thoughts just that burning desire. “use your words, tell me..”

it’s now or never. a silly thought, a stupid saying until you’ve reached that point where you find yourself saying it.

“please jaehyun, help me.” your small whisper lit him up completely, doing the boldest move yet you kissed him. you kissed jeong jaehyun, your secretary, your right hand man, your walking wet dream. he was quick to kiss you back, his hands now groping your breast as his squeezed and rotated them against you. his lips felt exactly how you imagined them being, soft, plump and most importantly, moisturized. he smiled into the kiss and you let out a small moan, taking it at an opportunity to deepen the kiss. feeling his hands roughly rip your button up open hearing them scatter on the floor you gasped as he pulled away from you, spinning you around to face him fully. “need to feel you.. please wanna make you feel good ___” he was wishing for this as much as you were, wasn’t oblivious? he went above and beyond just for you, he studied you and learn your lore. you think he’d treat you such a way if he wasn’t into you?

he was impatient, you were untouchable and unresponsive for so long he was reserved for you even of you weren’t. being so trigger happy he pulled you from your seat and held you close, no words spoken he wanted your lips on his. the kiss was sloppy, you felt his hands all over you. feeling every curve his dreams were coming true, thank god for that 11:11 wish he made.

he pulled your shirt from your shoulders as the clothing item fell of your body onto the floor leaving you in your black lacy bra and pencil skirt. something he could only imagine seeing, something he fantasized of seeing and now it’s happening. “so fucking beautiful.” he grunted. he wasn’t wrong, he’s never wrong.

“jaehyun” you felt his lips kissing down your jaw to your neck, his hands holding onto your back as he reached to undo the hooks of your bra. “you smell so good ___, i love it.” a little too much. feeling that tightness around your chest releasing, your boobs felt free. his wet soft kisses went lower down your chest, feeling yourself lean up against your desk to help him out a little he removed your last clothing item that hid your body from him, the cool air hitting your once warm and secured breasts you felt them hardening almost instantly. he smiled to himself as he teasingly licked your skin between them, looking up at you, you felt your body shudder slightly at the feeling. “you’re so pretty ___.” his breath radiating off your skin you felt his lips pampering around your areola. “please don’t tease.” you moan out. “i won’t, i won’t let you wait any longer than you need to.” slipping your nipple into his mouth you felt his tongue swirling around it you subconsciously arched your back against his face in pleasure.

“touch me more..”

he smiled against you, what a sight to see. your nipple in his mouth with his dimples decorating his cheeks- who would’ve thought his smile couldn’t get anymore attractive. he didn’t need to be told twice, you deserved this. he deserved this. this was way better than any bonus he got, you are better.

pushing up your skirt, bunched up around your waist he was quick to place his hand exactly where you needed it. imagine if you had let him leave. “tell me what you want me to do.” his hand rested on your cunt, not moving just laying against your flimsiest panties. you were sure he could feel the pooling wetness through them. he kissed your chest before standing up fully to face you with his hand still cupping your aching pussy

"don't be shy, i know your not shy when it comes to something you want.." he leaned closer, inches away from your lips as his breathing collided with yours making your heartbeat increase. "something you desire.." he smirked, this fucking guy.

his fingers teasingly moving around you gently making you clench around nothing, the aching sensation striking your core intensely you felt your body turning into mush, your mind completely shutting down- there’s always loopholes in everything jaehyun does. "are you gonna tell me what you want now?" his lips sloppy kissing the corner of your mouth. he groaned as you felt his lips placing butterfly kisses sensually on your burning skin.

"tell me." he muttered into your neck, making you tremble under his control.

"w-want you to touch me please.."

"touch you where baby? tell me exactly where you want me to touch you.." you proceeded to kiss and your face reddened at the embarrassment. he wanted you to be vocal and it wasn't something that you were used to- guess we all have to try something new.

"m-my.. my pussy.." wanting to crawl under your desk and hide, never saying those three words together to him in your life. it left you with your heart pounding and the tip of your ears becoming hotter as he lifted his head from your neck after nibbling and kissing on it.

"it wasn't that hard now was it?" he grinned removing his embrace from you only to pull you up from your desk to only flip you around and bend you over roughly.

"what took you so long to just tell me that you needed my assistance elsewhere huh?" his voice boomed, revealing your flimsy panties that barely covered your ass to the male eyeing you from behind shamelessly.

"such a naughty little thing." he beamed as you whimpered biting your lip and looking back to see the man's predatory gaze on your ass, kicking your legs apart to expose you even more from behind.

"the way you look at my hands.. you love them, don't you? you want them in you so bad huh? making you cum just only from my fingers.." and with what you least expected, a harsh impact of his hand colliding with your left ass cheek filled the room making you moan loudly at the sudden impact. you could hear his chuckle as he watched it jiggle, enjoying the sounds coming from you- just as he imagined. "such a fucking slut.." he said aggressively as another slap landed on the same cheek, making you clutch onto the edge of the desk with a gasp leaving you.

"enjoying a punishment from your secretary , imagine the whole board coming in to see you getting fucked by your assistant.."

you imagined the thought of getting fucked by jaehyun, all the girls who gawked over him trying their hardest to shoot their shot only to be rejected nicely by the korean.. now here he was touching you, giving you what all the girls on the floor wanted. your stomach erupted with butterflies at the thought of being caught by anyone you whimpered pathetically as a snicker escaped him. so dirty.

"oh i see, you'd like that wouldn't you? well, you always loved attention, willing to give anyone a show like the cock slut you are.." a harder smack coming in contact as you screamed feeling tears brimming your eyes as he laughed from behind, enjoying your reactions to his manhandling.

you felt his clothed erection rub up between your ass cheeks letting out a broken moan with the thought you finally getting to have that tonight-or so you thought. he began grinding against you as you pushed yourself back to feel him even more, reaching for the side of his thigh to pull him closer, resulting in another harsh slap on your ass again. "no baby, you wanted me to touch you tonight not fuck you.." your head softly dropping down on the desk in defeat as your breathing became heavy. he chuckled at your reaction pulling himself away as he caressed your now reddened ass cheek and the other before spreading them apart.

"shoulda been more specific sweet girl." fuck you jaehyun.

he released his grip as he watched both cheeks fall back into place with small jiggles. he bit his lip as he slipped his fingers sneakily inside of your thong, feeling how wet you became. you gasped as you rose your head up from the cluttered desk to look back at jaehyun who already had his eyes fixed on you with a grin.

"i'm gonna give you one more chance.." he circled your clit as you moaned at the incredible feeling growing from his fingers coming in contact with your sensitive hardened nub.

"how do you want me to touch your pussy?" his voice dropping an octave lower as you groaned, feeling your legs trembling already. "fuck.." you gasped as his fingers circled you a bit faster to gain a reaction from you, itching to hear more of those sinful moans.

"f-finger me jae, two in me.."

you cried out helplessly and desperately as he smiled watching how your body became limp to absorb the intoxicating feeling. he proceeded to rub your clit as you gripped tighter onto the edge of your desk, never wanting this to end.

"good job baby, now your getting the hang of how i run things.." he removed his fingers from your clit with a greedy groan leaving your lips as you felt the feeling slipping away from you quickly. you laid there panting and patiently as you didn't dare want to disobey the male. "be really good for me and i'll give you more later on alright angel?" he became face to face with you as your cheek rested on the desk, bracing yourself for what the man had in store- it sure did seem a bit intense honestly, it made you nervous but you were too needy and desperate to even disagree or even doubt his words.

"y-yes jae." you stuttered unintentionally, watching how his famous smile reappeared across his face. that dammed smile.

he eyed you for a few seconds before he removed himself from the table back to his original spot behind you. you breathed out your mouth as you decided to close your eyes waiting for the man to do something.

he attached his hands back onto your ass, giving it a light smack as you grunted lowly already feeling sensitive all over. he smiled to himself as he used his same hand to touch your aching pussy. he dipped his middle finger into you as you hummed in response, feeling his free hand give you a tougher smack. "m’gonna cum five times for me baby, then i'll properly take care of you and make us both feel good okay?"

"yes.. please.."

he smiled as he now shoved his second finger into you, scissoring you open in a rough motion that automatically made you let out a scream of pleasure. his fingers curled in all the right places as he watched your ass cheeks bounce up against his hand that pounded into you in a fast deep motion.

"jaehyun!" you squealed feeling your legs tremble uncontrollably as he bit his lip with a smirk plastered on his face seeing your head rise from the desk to let your sounds become more audible and if anyone was still here they would pass by your unlocked office hearing you get slutted out by the man himself.

"shit so good..”you grunted already feeling your first orgasm of the night approaching. your pussy clenching and unclenching around his fingers, signaling that you were about to erupt with his continuous fingering. "cum! don't stop.." you squealed as you griped tightly again, feeling your orgasm approach you quickly as you let out a loud cry with him proceeding to hit your g spot continuously.

"jaeh-hyun” you moaned stumbling over his name as you shook uncontrollably to your orgasm filling your body, feeling yourself becoming limp as he held onto his word never stopping as you quickly rode out your high on your way to another one, having you shake and groan from the overstimulation.

"good girl, four more to go."

⭐︎

[abbyslev]

𝑪𝑳𝑶𝑺𝑬𝑹- 𝑯𝑨𝑵𝑮𝑬 𝑿 𝑹𝑬𝑨𝑫𝑬𝑹

A/N: here’s a stupid idea i’ve had in my brain for a min and i FINALLY finished it! also don’t mind typos or anything, slightly tipsy rn. (dont drink tequila and vodka and use beer as a chaser??? EVER ???) anyway, enjoy enjoy😊👍🏼 my trip is so good currently like you guys i’ve never been so happy :(

WARNINGS: thigh riding, eating out, praise (IS THAT BAD IDFK 🤯), lots of kissing, fingering and whatever else i added in here idk i cant think rn 🤷🏻

You set your coffee down, eyebrows furrowing. “Problem?” Erwin looked up, eyes searching your stressed face. 

     “Yeah, uhm, just some bio homework. I really regret taking this fucking class.” You laugh, spinning your computer around to show him. His eyebrows raised, pushing your computer back to you. Levi approached you two, handing Erwin his food and placing your sandwich beside your drink. He read it over your shoulder before scoffing and sitting down next to Erwin. “Thank you.” He mumbled to Levi before kissing his hand. You scrunch your nose up, making a gagging noise. “In public is crazy.” You tease them with a smile. 

          “How am I supposed to figure this out?” You slap your hands on your face, dragging them down. “Your fault for choosing that class for extra credit.” Levi chuckled. “Shut up.” You roll your eyes. The three of you always met up at the library to study a lot, and today was one of those days. Unlucky for you, you were learning some pretty hard stuff, and had a hard time understanding it. It was starting to stress you out. “Just leave it for another day, email your professor and tell them to explain it better.” Erwin looked up from his computer, meeting your stressed eyes.

        “Hiya, everyone! Oooh, is that stem cells and the tissue formation process?” They leaned over, taking a glance at your computer. You perk up, meeting their excited eyes. “Yeah, do you know anything about it?” You question, watching as they set all their stuff down. They pull up a chair, sitting beside you. “Now you got them riled up.” Levi scoffed. “Oh shut up.” You sigh. “This is one of my favorite topics, since there's so many theories around it and the things that actually happen, which is why it's considered one of the harder topics. I passed this section with an easy 100.” Hange smiled.

         “Do you think you could help me? I can pay you!” You smile. “There's no need! I can help you anytime, you just text me the time and place.” Hange seemed fine on the outside, but on the inside they were exploding. Hange met you through Levi and Erwin. You guys lived next to each other and you hung out with Erwin and Levi a lot. Hange had some lengthy conversations with you but they never hung out with you one on one. This was a big step for them. Levi bumped Erwins elbow, eyeing you two. 

      “That would be great!” You pulled out your phone, allowing them to put in their number.  “What do you study?” You look up at them, admiring their excited brown eyes. “Biology!” they answer with a huge smile. You two engulf yourself in a conversation, completely forgetting the time. It wasn't until Erwin lightly tapped your shoulder, showing you his phone. “Oh, thanks.” You smile. 

         You two pack up your stuff, following Erwin and Levi out. “They’re so cute.” Hange points at their hands. Erwin had clasped him against Levi’s, leading him towards the car. “Did you need a ride home?” Hange turned to you, smiling. “I usually ride with them, but i don't mind riding with you if it's not a bother.” You smile. “Of course not!” Hange lead you to their car. “I’ll meet you guys later!” You called towards the two. “Sounds good.” Erwin waved, but gave Levi that knowing look. Hange opened your door, smiling. A certain item caught your eye.

       Hange had a frog plush sitting on their dash. “Where did you get this? Do you know what rare item you hold?” You slowly turn to them as they turn on the car. “Oh, yes. Do you know how much that cost me?” They push up their glasses before pulling off to your apartment. They played quiet music on the way back, occasionally cracking a joke or pointing something out. 

        They pull to a stop, unlocking the doors. “Thank you so much, I owe you lunch tomorrow! Do you just want to come over? It's gonna be crowded tomorrow.” You grab your bag and cup, turning to them. “Oh! Sure!” They nod quickly. “Sweet. Drive safe.” You close their door and wave, before walking inside. You peek out your window to see that they had only started driving off. They waited for you to get inside your apartment. You slap a hand over your mouth, screaming. You run to your bed, kicking your feet and squealing. God, you felt like you were a teenage girl with her first crush. 

        You always admired hange from afar. You had a math class with them last semester and you occasionally talked to them when Levi and Erwin were around, but never alone. You shook with excitement, too excited to do anything else. Hange was perfect in every way and now they were going to help you? You thanked yourself for keeping calm in front of them. You got up, heading to the shower. You had no idea how you were going to go to bed with this much excitement.

-

        You deep cleaned your apartment, and it felt like you were overdoing everything. A knock echoed through your home. You opened the door, smiling. 

          Hange had many books and a bag of food in their hand. “Come on in.” You smile, moving aside. “You can sit on the dinner table.” “Thanks!” They sit down. You join the, pulling out your computer. “You didn't have to get me anything!” You shake your head as they slide a bagel towards you. “Want anything to drink?” You offer. “A water is fine!” You stood up, grabbing two bottles from the fridge. You hand them one, sitting back down. 

       “So, where do you want to start?” They lean over to see your computer. “Here,” You pint. “Thats where we have to start, but its hard to understand it, i cant find theories in out book so i cant understand it.” You sigh. Hange opened a book up, trying to find a section. Their eyebrows furrowed, pushing their glasses up. “Oh! Here it is. This book practically answers everything youre looking for!” Hange slides the book over. 

        It had been a couple hours, and neither of you could explain how you ended up like this. You typed your last paragraph as Hange was above you, arms on either side of you and chin on top of your head. You two spent hours figuring stuff out, and even getting to know eachother. You typed the last sentence bewfore leaning back into their chest, groaning.

“Finally!’ You hit submit, stretching you neck. “See? That wasnt so bad!” Hange smiled. “Not for you!” You joked. “Thanks a lot for that, in really needed it. We have about three more assignments until the final quiz, if you want to help me with those too id be down!” You turn to look at them. It took all your might to not stare at their arms. In the hours of studying, Hange had taken off their flannel, leaving them in their black tank top and sweatoants. 

       “Sure! You just let me know and i can help.” They smile. After cleansing up and making sure they werent forgetting anything, they said their goodbyes and went on their way.

_

FIVE WEEKS LATER

          In the time that had passed, Hange and you had become close, inseparable you could say. The two of you did everything together. It had went from tutoring sessions to hangouts and eventually sleepovers. Erwin and Levi had caught on pretty quick, thanks to Hanges rants about you.  

       Levi handed Hange their food, sitting in front of them. “Levi, you have no idea how cute they are! LIke the way they caught on so quick asnd now they understand more than they could! And they got us this lego set to build, and we had pizza after! So good. And they did my hair too, doesnt it look so kuch softer?” Hange went on and on, their face turning red and eyes sparkling with excitement. Levi raised a brow, drinking his tea. “So youre in love with them?” Levi spat out. “Wha- no! Levi, that’s my friend! Nothing more.” Hange huffed, rolling their eyes. 

            From then on, Levi and Erwin kept an eye on you two. It was the small details that they had caught onto. You wore Hange’s favorite flannel, you always had a hair tie on your wrist if Hange ever needed one, Hange always carried your favorite chapstick and favorite gum. They started to form their own theories about you two. 

        Hange had woken up nervous, today was your big day! You finally had your big test on the things they had helped you study with. They knew how it had been eating you inside, but you had gotten a perfect score on all your small quizzes, so you should nail this, right? Hange sent you a long, sweet message making sure that you were prepared and that you were going to crush the test. You replied back, making Hange squeal. They invited you to dinner afterwards, at their house. You two could bake cookies and watch movies after. You accepted, saying it would ease your nerves.

-

        Hours had passed, and Hange nervously chewed on their fingers. How long would it be until you texted them?

       Suddenly, their door burst open, you running in, shaking a paper everywhere and cheering. Hange stood up from the couch, watching you with a smile. “What is it?” Hange tried to calm you down, but you couldnt stop jumping everywhere. “What is it, lemme see!” Hange grabbed your wrist, trying to get ahold of the paper. A pair of lips met Hamge’s, catching them by surprise. Hange’s eyes closed slowly, hands on either side of your face. You dropped the papers, tangling your hands through their short, soft hair. You two pulled away from the kiss, breathing in for air.

      “I passed with a one hundred.” You smile. Hange’s mouth dropped, eyes meeting the paper on the floor. There it was, a big 100 in red pen. Hange turned to you, pulling you back in for another kiss. You happily kissed them back, smiling against their lips. Hange’s hands slid under your shirt, hands rubbing up and down your waist. You hold on to their arm, whimpering. 

     Hange pushed you against the couch softly without breaking this kiss. You push them back down, throwing your leg over them and straddling them. You pulled your shirt off, the cold air sending shivers down your spine. Hange placed a hand on your bare back, pushing your body closer. They kissed all over your chest, leaving you in a mess.

     You grind your hips against their lap, lips whispering their name. “Be patient.” Hange laughed against your shoulder. “But I deserve it, no?” You pulled back, hands on their side of their face, lips ghosting over theirs. “I’ll show you what you deserve.” They pushed your head towards them, kissing the corner of your mouth down to your jaw.

      “Mngh, fuck.” You unbutton their shirt, hands running up and down their soft stomach. Hange pulled off their shirt, lips busy on your neck. You dig your nails into their skin, sucking in a deep breath as they focus on that one spot. 

         Hange picked you up from their lap, laying you down on the couch. They straddled you, hands palming your chest. Your face scrunched up, lips trembling. Hange kissed down your stomach, eyes focused on your pretty face. 

         They pull down your sweatpants, pressing a wet kiss on your hip bone. “Hange, please.” You yank your pants off, your core aching for some attention. Hange traced shapes on your thighs, running their lips up and down your inner thigh. You bucked your hips foward, hands in their hair. 

       Hange pushed your hips down with force, nails digging into your skin. Seeing you all spread out like this, begging for them was all they could ever ask for. Their lips finally met your wet cunt. Your legs closed around their head, a loud moan leaving your lips. You covered your mouth, stomach caving with every stripe of their tongue. 

         Hange pulled your hand away, placing it on your chest. They squeezed your boob, before slowly trailing their hand down to your thighs. They pushed them up, giving them more access. They pushed two fingers in you, watching as your back arched, fingers trying to find a grip on something. 

        They started off slow, thumb playing with your clit. They rested their head on your thigh, kissing it softly. Their soft, brown eyes met yours, which fluttered with every move they made. Your cheeks were tinted pink and lips were swollen from you biting down on them. 

        “Such a good baby. You worked so hard.” Hange praised you, fingers starting to speed up. Your legs threatened to close at any second, but you tried with all your might to not let them. It felt as if you couldn’t control your body, you were being washed over with euphoria.

      “God fucking damn, Hange!” You manage to spit out. Hange replaced their thumb with their mouth, sending you to the edge. You run your hands through their hair, legs shaking. Hange goes faster, watching as your legs close around their head once again. You arch your back, uncontrollable mewls leaving your mouth. Hange pulls out their fingers, immediately licking you up. 

         “Fuckfuckfuck!” You slur out, eyes shutting closed. Hange cleans you up, holding your waist down again. They come back up to you, kissing you. You messily kiss them back, body too tired to do anything else. 

        They sit down beside you, pulling you back into their lap. It felt like your legs were going to give out at any moment. “Hange…so tired.” You lean into their chest, kissing their neck.  “One more, baby… just one more.” Hange kissed your lips. You slowly started moving your hips against their thigh, light whimpers leaving your mouth. 

      “That’s it, just like that.” Hange helped you, their large hands moving you back and forth. “You did so good. Im so proud of you.” Hange pressed a kiss against your forehead, down to your lips and then your jaw. You fastened your pace, ignoring the ache in your legs.

       Hange looked unreal. Their hair had gotten loose from its usual updo from you messing with it, cheeks were dusted with pink and their eyes were dark and lustful. Their glasses slid off their nose slowly, lips crashing against yours

       Their glasses fogged, making you giggle against their lips. Hange gripped the fat of your hips, crescent-like pink shapes marking your skin. They placed their mouth on your cheek, warm breath fawning your face. They sloppily kissed the edge of your mouth, brain too fuzzy to think of anything else. 

       “I love you so much.” Your hands were on either side of Hange’s face, eyes meeting theirs. Hange felt their heart swell, just a couple weeks ago they were daydreaming about you and now they had you into a moaning mess for them.

        “I love you so much more.” They kissed you hard, wanting to bring you impossibly closer. “Hange, fuck.” You repeated over and over again, legs shaking and fastening your pace. “That’s it.” Hange pushed your hair back, nose against your cheek. 

        Your fingernails dug into their back, curse words and Hange’s name slurring out of your mouth. Hange held the back of your head, other hand on your lower back, bringing you closer. “Fuck, just like that.” They kissed your neck.  You slowed down, feeling their stomach and back, eyes closed. 

      “Should’ve asked you for help sooner.” You said, out of breath. “Mm, I guess we just found a new stress reliever, though.” Hange laughed, kissing your lips. 

[lvckyyz]

nemesis cabin headcanon

cabin’s song: thumbs- sabrina carpenter

nemesis is the goddess of revenge and justice

her children either only follow the rules, or create the rules themselfs

they can look a bit intimidating at first, but they’re really fun after you get to know them better

cabin 16 is one of the most introverted cabins in chb

the girls in cabin 16 usually become great hunters of artemis

they’re all really good at sword fighting

they like board games (idk why, but everyone i know from cabin 16 are obsessed with this games)

they hate when people don’t listen to their opinion or are not open to debate differents points of view

clearly vindictive

most of them are addicted to coffee and/or energy drinks

they like to sleep only a few hours because they think something bad is going to happen at night and they have to be ready to protect their siblings

when new half-bloods arrive at cabin 16, the ones who were there for longer try to scare the new kid and only start being nice some days/weeks later. no one knows why, but they say it’s just a way to make sure the new kid is trustable

they have a solution for all kinds of problem, it’s just natural for them to know what to do when things aren’t going the way they should

you can’t lie to them, they know when you’re lying

they also can’t lie to you, like they are not able to do so

friends with cabin 1, 5 and 13

they’re always showing support to the demigods who have never been claimed by their godly parent

children of nemesis are kinda methodic and like things in their own way

don’t touch their things unless you want to lose an arm

i’m sorry but i can't see nemesis as a really caring mother. i actually believe she’d punish their children every time they are not fair with someone (in the “gods way”, maybe she might be a bit mean to her children sometimes)

they want to understand people’s mind but don’t have patience to talk with real people

they’d rather working alone than having to deal with groups

sometimes they get mad and don’t even know why

they don’t waste time with things that won’t benefit them

most of them have pretty intense eyes

a/n: thank you for reading!

next: cabin 18 👼🏻

[olderthannetfic]

A lot of these discussions about colonizer romance or slave fantasies or similar just feel like the race version of the way certain feminists keep wringing their hands about rape fantasies and the “problem” of them. Like, sure, there are certainly people in the “privileged” group in question who enjoy those in the more “problematic” way that might speak to something concerning about how they view any real-life partners or sex (“might” being a key word here)… for instance, the slavery isekai anime trend seems to be most popular with gross dudes who really do think having a slave woman who waits on you hand and foot and also has sex with you is desirable and wish they could have that irl. But I think the bigger reason these “problematic” fantasies persist is that a lot of people in the equivalent “marginalized” group also really like it in their own ways. They like eroticizing that experience that is so troubling irl. It’s clear some of the people who like these “colonizer” romances are colonized people just as a lot of women love rape fantasies.

Idk, I don’t think the discussion is as simple as saying that what porn or romance you are into has *zero* effect on your IRL sexuality. I think it’s hard to argue that if you’re getting off to something a lot, it doesn’t impact the rest of your life in at least some way, the brain doesn’t draw firm walls around these things— and there’s just the objective fact every young straight woman I’ve known has observed that a lot of younger straight guys have had their expectations of women and sex warped by the unrealistic stuff they’re seeing in porn. But I think like with any other “how does the media affect us?” question: it’s almost never an exact 1:1. Different media deals with these topics differently, and even the same media can affect different people different ways, or even the same person different ways at different points in their life. That’s the issue with “anti”-style thinking, not that fiction can never affect real life. It’s that it’s never as simple as just making a list of bad things no one can like. One person’s trash is another’s treasure and v.v., and what can be irredeemable hateful garbage to one person can be cathartic to another. Just like how the kinks that your abuser used to justify abusing you can be used by another person as their lifeline to help them enjoy sex again after abuse. Rape fantasies or racial fantasies that may seem objectively bad when framed around how privileged people view them… well, that’s not the only framing (and maybe we should stop centering privileged people all the damn time?)

So like even aside from the fact that “colonizer romance” does not have a single objective definition and that people are putting a wide swath of stuff into that label, and it should be used as the start rather than end of a conversation… are we even sure that everyone is coming at it from the POV of the colonizer? Are more people really viewing themselves as John Smith or as Pocahontas? And so when looked at that way, isn’t it really more another version of the eternally-popular-among-women “I can change/fix him!” narrative? (Which itself can be critiqued, particularly in how often patriarchal media sells that to women and why… but that’s a different conversation from the usual “colonizer romance” conversation.)

Or maybe some people are just inherently drawn to cross-cultural romances in general, and those people also like ones that don’t have a colonizing aspect to them?

Like, there’s a lot to unpack here that isn’t in these conversations. We can’t just make this the new buzzword, thought-terminating cliche.

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