#if i met someone in an organic way. idk how. then i would be like hey. but i can't imagine the words 'i am a huge fan' coming out my mouth

[lascapigliata]

my brother's gf works at [insert famous talk show here] and every once in a while i'm like. should i keep track of who's going to be on the show so if they come on i can get tickets to be in the audience and try to meet them which i think she could do! and then i remember that most of me actually does not want to meet a celebrity at all in that kind of capacity

[hellfire--cult]

Edit of Eddie: Sofiiel

Stripper!Eddie x Shy!Fem!Reader

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 - Part 8 (end)

⚠️ +18 MDNI, Stripper!Eddie, Stripper!Billy, Stripper!Steve, sensual dancing, shyness towards men, nervousness, fainting, sexual innuendos.

Summary: You thought you were cursed with your shyness, but after one embarrassing night, you decide it's time to change, and you believe someone might be able to help with that.

A/N: IDK MAN. I just needed to write this down so that my brain could stop messing with me and I am still writing. This will be a two part thing, maybe three, with long chapters. It will have smut, and a lot of sexual tension my boys, but it won't be a long series.

As always, all reblogs help, tagging it, and I always enjoy reading your comments!

Part 1

You shouldn’t be here.

You knew you were not going to be able to tolerate it, yet, here you are, at your best friend’s bachelorette party. You weren’t nervous about that, no. Before coming to the place you are now, you had all gathered at her home, which was decorated and drinks, food and games were all around to play with. 

Most of the time, you could handle the decoration your other best friend picked. Robin was in charge of decoration for Nancy’s wedding, and everywhere you looked, a dick was there. In all shapes, colors, and some were not even humanly shaped. But there were times in the day where you had to excuse yourself to catch your breath in the bathroom because of it as well.

And now, things have gotten worse. Extremely worse. Because you seriously forgot this part of the party. This part that Robin had talked to you about. This part where you begged her to not do it because it was super cliché.

You were at a strip club. A male, strip club.

“Best seats on the house ladies!” The host greeted us and you could read the name on the tag as Joyce. She seemed nice, and welcoming, but the place you were in wasn’t remotely inviting to you. The table, in question, was right next to the end of the catwalk, so you were going to have the show right in front of your face.

You were sweating already, feeling your stomach flutter around as you looked around to all the excited women waiting for the show to begin. You didn’t even read the presentation of the men that were performing tonight. There were pictures at the entrance, with their names, ages, and some hobbies, but you couldn’t even do that.

“Hey, you okay?” Robin whispered to you worriedly, and you snapped your head towards her. You didn’t even know you were staring at the catwalk with a terrified look in your face. “You can go to the bathroom if you want, or just go wait in the car? I don’t want you there alone, but if it’s too much, just leave.” She says to you, not promising to go with you if that does happen.

You cannot blame her, and you can’t be mad either. She had organized everything, knowing you couldn’t do it. Knowing there was no way you would do a reservation on a place like this. She can’t leave Nancy, not even if Barb, Vickie, and Kali were there, so you just nodded at her, trying to shake your nervousness away.

“Yeah, yeah… I’m fine Robs.” You replied to her and she sighed, giving you a small nod. You didn’t want Nancy to have a bad night, so you believed you could endure this, just for an hour or two. 

But your shyness towards men has followed you since childhood.

You tried kissing, getting a boyfriend, even having sex, yet, meeting random men made your nerves go crazy on you, to the point of almost feeling like throwing up. You thanked your dad for this horrible curse. Growing up with no male figure whatsoever, and your mom being cheated on three times in your face did nothing to help with your shyness, and sometimes, even fear. Just small of it.

You weren’t afraid of men. You were afraid of what they could do, of what they could ruin in just a second, of how manipulative they can be. You know women can do that too, but you never met one like that, nor heard stories about it. You’ve seen it in movies of course, even books of the woman being the cheater and the horrible person you believed only men could be. 

But the shyness always worsened if the man before you was handsome. Your ex boyfriend was just remotely attractive to you, that’s why you gave it a chance. It sounds horrible, but you weren’t attracted to him, because if you were, you were sure to shut down every time he talked to you. 

It’s sad you weren’t attracted to women like Robin is, or bisexual like Vickie. If you were, you might not even have this problem, or maybe yes, because if you were attracted to women too, then this issue might even escalate there. 

But you weren’t, so that’s why your shyness didn’t exist around the female crowd. 

“Okay ladies, prepare your bills!” Barb yelled excitedly and your heart almost jumped out of your chest. You were seated the farthest away from the stage, so you would have to just sit back and hope to make no contact with whoever dances on that stage.

You were also hoping these men weren’t even remotely handsome. 

The lights went off as your drinks were getting delivered and you were chugging down on your Margarita as if it were water to make your nerves go away, knowing very well they won’t, while the rest of your friends yelled loudly in excitement. The tables full of ladies around you also yelled loudly as Unholy from Sam Smith started playing and your breath caught in your throat as the first man walked out.

He had brown hair, with a bit of volume and styled nicely, brown eyes, and he was dressed like a priest, rosary dangling in his left hand. He was handsome, yes, but thanks to the outfit your nerves were still remotely stable. You heard the ladies all around you cheer while drinking some beer.

“Hello Stevie boy!” You heard the woman coo as she waved at him, and you saw him wink back at her. She must be a regular you thought. The lights were bright as he walked down the catwalk, between the tables, and you were feeling your leg going up and down as he came closer. 

The lights suddenly went fully red as the chorus hit, and his grand had gripped the collar of his cassock, and in one tug, he had ripped the buttons, fully opening his garments and your eyes widened, your stomach turning into a sea of nerves and nausea as his abdomen was revealed, slightly toned, beauty marks all over. Your eyes trailed downwards, and he was wearing some tight short black briefs. Your friends all cheered as he took the garment off, throwing it on the floor as he swayed his hips while running the rosary all over his chest, down towards his abs.

You were surprised no one was offended by this.

He turned towards the table that was opposite of yours and dropped on his knees as he swayed his hips towards the ladies there. You had perfect view of his ass and you blushed a deep red as you tried to look away. You were glad it wasn’t your table, because you weren’t going to do what the ladies in that table or your friends were going to do. 

Dollar bills were being shoved in his briefs by hungry and lustful hands, and he always kept a smile on his face. You turned to see he was facing your table and the blood in your system drained completely. He crawled over and as he reached the very edge of the catwalk, he glided his abdomen down, as if grinding onto the floor, and his eyes were trained on Nancy.

She was wearing a small crown with white flowers, and a small white veil dropped at the back of her head. He knew it was a bachelorette party. You sighed with relief knowing this now. You weren’t going to be the focus of it! All the men were going to pamper Nancy because they know it’s her bachelorette party! One last whoop of ‘freedom’ before tying the knots. 

He jumped off the catwalk as he stepped over towards Nancy. You saw how he moved Nancy’s chair to face away from the table and she was giggling at the strength he had. You were trying to keep up with the clapping to the music but you were distracted as he stood over Nancy, over her lap, both hands gripping the back of her chair, his face inches from hers.

You were sweating now. You don’t know how Nancy could be smiling at this, shoving bills in his briefs. He bit onto the rosary that was wrapped in his left wrist, making it unwrap itself from there, and let it dangle from his mouth as he grabbed onto her hands and made her roam his chest, down to his abdomen sensually.

“GO NANCE!” Robin yelled while cheering and you were just stunned at how calm everyone is about this. He was swaying his hips over her as their eyes were locked with one another. You could see him smirking with the rosary’s beads still in his mouth and your jaw almost dropped at how sexy this man was, and you were extremely intimidated by it.

Your feet wanted to up and leave, but you were trying to stay calm, knowing Nancy had her veil on, and the night would be on her.

This Stevie boy leaned down to her face and his nose nudged her cheek, and you were sure he was going to kiss it, but he didn’t. He was letting heavy hot breaths onto Nancy’s skin, making it have goosebumps all over and shiver. Knowing this, Steve finally pulled away, putting the rosary around Nancy’s neck, winking down at her and pushing himself off her.

He hopped on the stage, the song finishing while the women cheered all around. He bent down towards his outfit to get something out of pockets and your eyes widened when he took a bottle out, a large vial with a cross on it. He grabbed onto the cork with his teeth, smirking as the crowd yelled in excitement. He walked back towards Nancy, dropping down off the stage, the lights shining on them as he handed Nancy the bottle and making her stand up from her chair. 

Nancy bit her lip as he slowly got on his knees, his hands over his chest in a praying position and you felt your heart coming out of your throat as he smiled up at her. She put the bottle over his chest and tilted it, dropping the water on him. All the girls were cheering and you looked down to the table to fight the shakiness and the blush on your cheeks. 

How did the girls do this with no problem? 

The song ended and he got claps all around as well as Nancy who was fanning herself with her other hand. The man stood up, completely drenched, his body glistening under the lights. Nancy took all of the bills from the girls and started shoving them in the edges of his briefs while he chuckled at her enthusiasm. He knew she liked the show.

“What a lucky man.” You heard him flirt with her, giving the table a wink which made you jump slightly, and he got on the catwalk under the dimmed lights, receiving claps and last hollers as he picked his outfit from the stage and gave a last smile to the crowd before disappearing behind the curtains. 

“Oh my god.” Nancy made you snap out of your staring as she fixed her chair back onto the table, and she was still fanning herself, putting the bottle on the table. “I am definitely taking that as a souvenir.” 

All your friends giggled and you couldn’t even take off the panicked look you had on your face. You licked your lips as everyone ordered a new round of drinks. You needed to calm these nerves down and you decided to talk to Robin again.

“Robs, how many dancers are there?” You asked her and she winced slightly and then sighed.

“Just two more.” Two. Two, okay that wasn’t so bad, you can handle two more. “You doing okay? Was that too much?”

“A little freaked out, but thankfully, Nancy is going to be the main person at our table, so I won’t be even near these men.” You said, almost as if convincing yourself and Robin nodded at you with reassurance which made you sigh a little bit in relief. You can handle a little more, it was bad, but it didn’t happen to you so watching it was tolerable.

After a few minutes, Joyce brought another round of drinks and you had another Margarita ready to be downed in two seconds. Your nerves stood on end as the lights dimmed again. You heard the roaring of a car as the song ‘Bad Karma’ from Miley Cyrus started blasting on the speakers. 

The curtains opened to a man wearing just a denim jacket over his naked torso, a blonde mullet in his hair, sunglasses over his eyes, while his legs were covered in tight jeans and a black belt around his waist. The women cheered and you could see some already fanning their faces. 

“This is Billy, right?” You heard Barb ask Kali, which the girl nodded excitedly. You could see the man smirk, showing his teeth towards the crowd as he licked over them as if excited. He walked a little bit to be in the center of the stage, and he turned around to shake his hips slowly while holding onto his jacket, opening it wide. Your eyes fixed on his backside, and his ass was even better than the last man. You felt your body burning wildly as he turned around, showing his torso in his full glory thanks to him widening open his jacket. 

Moans could be heard in the song and this Billy guy bit his bottom lip as he started to take off his jacket, slowly, swaying side to side, teasing all the women he was standing in front of. They were whining at him for not fully taking his jacket off. He nodded towards his jeans and the women understood perfectly, standing excitedly to shove some bills into the edges and some in his pockets while he chuckled, his hips moving from side to side.

He fully took off his jacket, throwing it towards the start of the stage and the women cheered as he grabbed the hands of an older woman, looking like 70’s or more, while bending down, kneeling in front of her. She was laughing, feeling shy about the action, shaking her head to a younger woman who was encouraging her. You tilted your head at the woman in confusion. She was acting shy, trying to pull away with a smile to her face but he was still holding onto her. If she didn’t want to, why was he making her do it?

You saw how his smirk turned into a soft smile, intertwining his fingers with hers, saying something to her and you could see the woman smile, while giving him a soft nod and she put both her hands on his chest, and he yelled out in cheer towards the crowd, who all clapped and cheered for the bravery of the lady. 

He smiled down at her as the woman retreated her hands with a giggle. The younger one was laughing next to her, cheering her on and this man bent down to give the older woman a kiss on the cheek, leaving her red and you could even see the words ‘thank you’ displayed on her lips. He stood back up, his smile turning into a devilish smirk again as he scanned the room. His eyes landed on your table again, and you jumped slightly because you didn’t know who he was looking at, but you didn’t have anything to worry about it, because it was Nancy’s bachelorette party—

Nancy wasn’t wearing her crown. She didn’t have the veil on.

You felt your breath getting caught in your throat as he walked towards the table, hopping off the catwalk and walking by Nancy, passing his hand in the back of her chair. He then passed behind Robin’s. You tensed up when you felt his presence behind you, your knuckles going white on your thighs, not even daring your gaze to follow him. Your heart was beating wildly, like never before. If you were to look at your smartwatch, it was probably at 165 bpm. 

You felt the air you were holding in your lungs leaving you when he didn’t grab your chair, or you for that matter, but he held tightly onto the back of Barb’s chair, tilting her backwards for her head to look up at him, hitting onto his torso. He grinned at her, taking his sunglasses off and you were stunned to see the brightest set of eyes you’ve ever seen in your whole life. You didn’t expect those irises, and you could see Barb’s throat bobbing up and down nervously.

He put her back in place as he shoved one of his sunglasses’ temples down Barb’s cleavage, hooking them in place there. His hands ran over her chest and down her sides. You saw your friend’s eyes close as she shivered with a smile on her face. You caught something in your peripheral view, and saw Joyce walking with a small tray. She put it in front of Barb and your eyes widened when you saw a small glass with salt in it, a slice of lemon, and a shot of tequila. 

“Oh…” Barb said with wide eyes, and she felt her chair being pulled away from the table and the man chuckled at her, stepping in between her and the table, showing her his white teeth.

“That’s for me, sweet thing.” The women around us cheered and swooned, as Nancy hollered towards Barb while he bent towards Barb’s ear to whisper something and you saw Barb smiling and nod in approval. 

You gulped tightly as you saw him grab the lemon from behind him and then hold onto the back of Barb’s head, tilting it backwards. He ran the lemon onto the side of her neck, dampening it, and then he ran a thumb on Barb’s chin, making her open her mouth. He put the side of the lemon’s skin in her mouth and she held it in between her teeth. He then grabbed onto the salt, and put some on his hand.

The ladies around us were clapping with rhythm at the same time, encouraging what was happening as he smiled devilishly at his crowd. He then looked down at Barb and pressed the salt onto the dampened part of her neck, sticking it to the skin. She shivered at the touch and he then wiped his hand on his jeans as he held onto the tequila shot in his other one. 

“Ready for me?” You heard the women ‘woo’ at his words and you almost covered your eyes as he tilted Barb’s head to the side, leaning down towards her with a smirk on his lips. He took his tongue out and gave it a flat lick, slowly, sensually, pressing his tip at her pulse point as he felt the salt finish. 

“Holy fuck.” You heard Robin say and you just wanted to bolt the hell out of there. This was too much, even for you, a spectator. He took the shot, throwing his head back with it, throwing the glass to the side, and it didn’t even break. He held onto the back of Barb’s head, leaning back down to lick onto the lemon on her mouth. Barb’s fingers were hooked at the front pockets of his jeans, pulling him close. He smirked widely as he finally bit onto the lemon, his lips touching Barb’s as he did so.

Your breath got caught in your throat. You didn’t know Strippers could kiss guests, clients at that. In the cheek, or neck, was one thing, but on the lips? 

Your group of friends had dollar bills in their hands, ready to put them in his pants and you felt a deep blush creep in your face from nervousness and embarrassment. You didn’t want to be the only one to not put a bill there. He was just doing his job, but you were just too shy to do so. Robin grabbed your hand and put a bill in there and you were wide eyed looking at her.

“I’ll help you, you can just close your eyes!” You were thankful for Robin. She was helping you in not being seen as a cheap person, not paying them for their entertainment. You nodded nervously at her, gulping loudly as you saw the Billy guy finally pull away from Barb. He took the lemon out of her mouth, throwing it onto the tray again. She was smirking at him and he followed her gaze to his pants and he saw the money she shoved in the front pockets of his jeans.

“What a sneaky baby.” He winked at her and he walked towards Nancy for her to shove her bills in his pockets, then Kali, then Vickie, Robin, and you felt your breath on your throat as he looked at you, cocking his head to the side as he inspected you. Robin grabbed tightly onto your hand and you closed your eyes, feeling your heart in your throat as she guided you towards the hem of his pants. As soon as you felt the denim, you shoved the bill there, and your hand flew back to your lap, as well looking down at your table.

You didn’t even look if he was still there or not, but you felt your body on fire, and cold at the same time. You didn’t know if you would be able to take another dancer. The anxiety and nervousness was destroying you inside out at this point. 

“He’s gone.” You heard Robin whisper and a sigh of relief escaped you as all the girls looked at you worriedly.

“You can go to the car, I won’t get mad babes…” Nancy coos at you and you look up at her. You remembered how Nancy helped you move into your apartment, settle in, help you call your internet service and fight off the plumber that wanted to scam you for a leak that was in the kitchen sink. You shook your head at her and let out a breath.

“I’m okay, it’s just one more, right?”

“I took off my veil so that everyone could have the chance of a dance–” At that Kali intervened.

“We don’t mind if you put it back on, it might make her feel more comfortable.” You were thankful for the friends you had, all understanding, but you didn’t want to ruin their fun, so you put on a bright smile on your face and nodded at Barb.

“What if the next dancer does something even wilder than what this Billy dude did to Barb here?” You said with a laugh and the girls erupted in giggles as Barb herself blushed a deep red.

“Oh god… You guys know I’m not one the guys go for, so it felt… so nice.” You knew about Barb’s self esteem being low, but you always found her so beautiful. You didn’t understand how she didn’t see that in herself. 

“You look hot Barb! And I am a lesbian, so take it as a fact.” Robin said and Vickie nodded at that, smiling widely.

“I second that.” A blush creeped on Barb’s cheeks and she gasped when she felt the sunglasses hanging on the V-Shaped cleavage of her shirt. 

“Oh… Guess I have a souvenir as well.” Barb smirked and you smiled at her happiness and giddiness. You wished you could react like that when a handsome man did something nice for you, but all you ever did was mutter a silent ‘thanks’ and walk away when it happened. You once had a nice looking man help you reach the top of a shelf in the supermarket, helping you get the raspberry jam you couldn’t reach. 

You turned around to thank the person before you, but as soon as you saw the beautiful middle aged man that stood behind you, gray hairs and all, you almost fainted. Your air pipe immediately closed, and you felt too dizzy to even say anything to him. 

So you ran away, forgetting the jam and all.

It was a curse because you didn’t know how to solve this, and you cannot be in a relationship if you have no attraction towards the person. Your sex life would be miserable, and you won’t ever be entirely happy. The worst part, is that, if you catch feelings, the person before you would look beautiful to you no matter what, so you were scared of it ever happening, even though you terribly desired it.

You stiffened when the lights dimmed again, and you saw many women near the catwalk and stage get up excitedly. You could hear whispers here and there while you looked around to see what was going on. 

“Last time, I got a lap dance from him, it was so good Donna.” You heard a woman say to the other and then another conversation caught your ear, right behind you.

“You think Eddie will have his hair down or in a bun today?”

So, the last man’s name is Eddie. Okay, just one more dance, and he might not even target your table now! Nancy doesn’t have the veil on, Barb already had a sexy time, so they have to prioritize other tables, other clients. Yes. It’s alright, you can do this, there’s no problem at all, you just have to push through your nerves and nausea and–

‘Do I wanna know?’ by Arctic Monkeys started playing and you shivered at the tune. You didn’t even want to look, but the excitement and shine in your friends' eyes made you a little curious as to what they were looking at. You turned your head towards the stage, and your eyes widened like plates as you saw the man standing on it.. 

You felt your air leaving your lungs, quite literally at the sight of him. He was extremely gorgeous, even without the clear irises the last guy had, Eddie was absolutely mesmerizing. He had his hair up in a bun, some stud on his chin, and then your eyes went downwards, towards his outfit. He had a black crop top on, with a leather jacket on top, but your eyes bulged when you saw the happy trail of dark hair, going from his abs, down the hem of his leather pants that were tightened with a black belt that had handcuffs at the front of it.

He was too attractive, too inviting, and you felt like vomiting at this very moment. 

He winked towards a group of ladies on the side and headed towards them, bending down, grabbing onto the bottle of champagne one was holding. He took a sip of it, and held onto the cheek of the girl before him. You felt your heart almost coming out of your mouth as the girl, willingly, opened her mouth. He leaned forward, and kissed the woman before him, giving her the alcohol he just took a sip of. 

Okay, he is a bold one. A very bold one.

He pulled away with a smirk to his face, leaving the girl completely dazed and your jaw dropped when you saw her put a One Hundred Bill in the front pocket of his leather pants. Not only did she put one in his pocket, but another girl next to her as well, and the next one too. Why are they handing out one hundred bills as if it were candy!? 

You saw him starting to pull off his jacket, revealing his arms full of tattoos, as he swayed it back and forth on his body, fully taking it off after some cheering, and he threw it on the floor afterwards. He bit his bottom lip as he dropped to his knees, and your eyes widened when his hips started moving back and forth, slowly, graciously, as if thrusting into something. The girls on his right were waving bills at him with excitement in their voices. He chuckled, sliding towards them and your eyes widened when he held a man’s hand.

You took notice of Eddie’s hands, covered in rings as he put the man’s knuckles up to his lips, kissing them tenderly. The young man was fanning himself as the girls next to him were squealing, yelling ‘Happy birthday Johnny!’ to him. Eddie motioned for something behind the girls, at their table, and one of them grabbed onto a plate that had a slice of cake on it. 

Eddie scooped some of the whipped cream with his fingers and he smirked as he wiggled them in front of the man’s face. 

“Oh my god…” You gasped as you saw the young guy opening his mouth, and Eddie pushed his fingers inside. You felt your stomach do a violent turn at that, your nervousness was now at its peak. Everything with this guy was not even discreet, or with double meanings. He was going straight to the point, taking what he wanted, not even scared of doing so. 

You could handle the small dances, and hip grinding, but going for a straightforward kiss? Sticking his fingers inside someone else’s throat? He was definitely the favorite, and you could guess why, but you didn’t want to stay and find out just what else he was willing to do. You didn’t think you would be able to push away your nerves any longer, so you nudged Robin, catching her attention. 

“Robs, I think I’m gonna go to the bathroom until this show is over.” Robin nodded at you, and squeezed your hand.

“I figured, he is… He is something else.” She said with a small chuckle and you could only nod, gulping heavily as the beat of the song rang in your ears. 

“Send me a message when it’s safe to come out, okay?” You say to her and she gives you a thumbs up. You stood up, not daring to look forward, or catch the man’s eyes. You don’t want him to think you were bored, you just simply couldn’t take the boldness of it all anymore. You went to grab your purse, and suddenly you froze.

Over your hand, which was on top of the small container with your belongings, a ring clad hand pressed over your knuckles, stopping you. A light was on you, and you felt your blood completely drain from your body as a wood-like scent invaded all of your personal bubble. You didn’t know where to look, what to do, what to say to escape, and you felt yourself take a sharp intake of breath when you felt his other hand gliding over your left thigh, just gently, as if brushing.

“Is my show boring you, princess?” A hot breath brushed your ear as he spoke low towards you. Goosebumps displayed all over your body, a sharp shiver ran up and down your spine and you felt a cold sweat invading your body. It wasn’t panic, it was plain nervousness, anxiety of being this close to a man. A handsome man. A man that was bold with his movements, not even a stutter in them. 

He grabbed onto your hand, and turned you around, making you face him and if you didn’t have breath in your lungs before, right now, every part of you was empty. No air, no blood, nothing. The only thing you felt was the tight knot in your stomach, and shakiness happening on your knees. You wanted to tell him, talk to him, say that you weren’t comfortable, but you couldn’t speak. Your words were completely snatched away.

His brown eyes were staring into yours, as he guided your hand up, behind his head, and you felt the bun on top of it as you kept staring into his face. You didn’t know if you were red or pale at this point, but you needed to run away. He grabbed onto the tie of his bun with the tip of his finger, and pulled, letting his hair cascade around his face and on top of his shoulders.

Your eyes were wide, lungs contracting on themselves as the man before you became even more handsome than before just by letting his hair down. Your heart was breaking your chest open, because never in your life have you had an interaction like this before with a man. Not with someone as attractive as he was. Not with someone who was making your nerves go crazy in your whole body, making you hyper aware of everything around and how his eyes were staring down at you. 

You were feeling your breath quicken as he guided your hand with his, downwards, under and you felt your fingertips run over his crop top and then towards the hem of it. You jumped slightly when you felt his skin under your hand, and you started feeling light headed, dizzy, and you needed air, god, you needed air. His face got close to you once again and you wanted to pull away, run, anything, you needed to leave and you couldn’t communicate it. 

“No need to be shy with me sweetheart.” And his nose brushed with yours. He was going to kiss you. He was going to smash his lips with yours. He was going to close the distance. You were going to be able to taste him. You were going to have his scent go into your nose and fill your lungs completely with it. Your body will flush against his, press against his chest, his hips pressing against yours.

He was going to kiss you.

And you blacked out.

End of part

A/N: I always believed that if Barb and Billy remained alive and helped the group, they would definitely do the Enemies to Lovers thing. Like, yes.

Taglist is open!

Here are the songs for this part:

Steve's:

Billy's:

Eddie's:

[albertdabuttler]

Masked Adversary | D.L.

MASTERLIST

this fics masterlist

fandom: Kick-Ass

pairings: Dave Lizewski/Kick-Ass x F!Reader

WARNINGS: cussing, suggestive thoughts?? mentions of kissing 👅👅, angst and overthinking cause im a hater. SLOW BURN :P

summary: You and Dave have lost a childhood friendship. The circumstances have made you grow to despise one another, until KickAss has no one else to turn to but you, causing him to develop a small crush. The only problem being that you don't know it's him.

WC: Like 3k idk

Guys lmk if I ate…

———————

You had just finished showering when you heard your mom calling your name, telling you there was someone at the door for you. Thankfully, you were dressed and had finished drying your hair already. “Coming!” Opening the door of your steamy bathroom, you were met with Dave walking past to your room.

“I already sent him up!” She called from downstairs, far too late.

“Hey,” You spoke in a rather awkward tone, slipping past him towards your room as he followed. “Uh, sorry if it’s a little messy, I was gonna organize it before you got here but you got here already so… Yeah.” You picked up everything from your desk, taking your things to your bed to study comfortably.

Dave stood there awkwardly, not sure if he should also sit on your bed with you or… Anywhere else.

“Come on, dude,” you scoffed in amusement, patting your bed to get him to sit down. He laughed nervously, setting his bag next to your bed and taking his notebook and pen out. He sat down across from you, at the end of your bed while you sat by your pillows.

“Nice shirt,” he said, seeing the Robin shirt you were wearing and remembering he had drenched it in his blood. You looked down at it, smiling to yourself. “I found it in my closet yesterday and… I—I just washed it.” Dave himself was just wearing a tee and sweats.

“Okay, so I was able to get half of my stuff done after you dropped me off earlier, but I still have this part to finish.” You pointed at your laptop, showing him what you still had to write and continued to talk about what else you had to finish.

It was a project for science. The two of you had to put together a presentation on some animals or something.

“So…” you tapped your pen against your knee.

Finishing writing a sentence, he lifted his eyes to look at you, “Yeah?”

Was it just you or was he actually starting to look… Good?

“Um…” You looked to the side as you thought of an ice breaker. “You had any girlfriends yet?”

He blushed and smiled awkwardly, “Uh…” Scoffing at himself, he looked around as if an answer would pop into his view. “Not really… Why…?” He squinted at you.

“Hm. Still a loser I see. Glad to know you haven’t changed.” You teased. He only rolled his eyes, looking back down at his paper.

“You’re so annoying. Didn’t you get dumped like three times?”

“Unbelievable,” you watched him, rolling your eyes. “When you get a girlfriend you can talk shit.”

He smirked. “You’re not denying it.”

You glared at him. “I dumped them.”

“Right.” He looked back down at his notebook, trying to hold back a smile.

You glanced up at him again, taking in his features, the way his glasses slowly slid down his nose as he looked down, the way his bottom lip was caught between his teeth in concentration.

Before you knew it, he was looking up at you with a curious look. “…What?”

You blinked, hiding the flustered feeling you got from him catching you staring.

“You’re also not as incredibly nerdy looking as I remember.”

He can only glare at you. “What’s that supposed to mean?” But alas, he hoped it meant you were attracted to him. At least almost as much as he was to you.

“Nothing you just… Don’t look so bad after all this time.”

He quickly looked back down at his notebook, unsure of how to feel from the so called ‘compliment.’ Although his heart was pounding through his ribcage, he decided to tease.

“You think I’m cute?” He gave you a smolder.

“Oh hell no.” You scoffed at the stupid face he made.

“Maybe.”

Even if you had whispered that last part, he still heard it.

You had spent almost an hour working on your project before you heard your dad knock at your door. You had no time to answer before he opened it.

“Dinner’s ready.” He said, smirking at Dave. “Keep the door open.”

You rolled your eyes. “Dad, you know it’s not like that.”

Dave and your father had a very good relationship before you had stopped being friends. There were even times where your dad would go out of his way to invite Dave and his dad over for dinner. They even had their own inside jokes.

“Don’t worry, sir.” Dave shook his head, “I’m way out of her league.” He had a smug look on his face that made you want to shove him out of your house.

“Up top,” said your dad, holding his hand up as Dave stood up. You knew your dad loved you and was just teasing, but it still annoyed you.

“You guys suck.” You said, pushing past your dad and meeting your mom in the kitchen while they laughed.

If it was any other guy, like your last boyfriend, your dad would have beat his ass for saying something like that. But it was Dave, and Dave was like the son your dad never had.

“Love you, hun.” Your dad called after you but you didn’t reply.

You set the dinner table quickly, sitting down as your mom set the food down.

Your dad sat at the end of the table with your mom across from you, Dave’s usual spot had always been next to you and that didn’t change.

“Where have you been? We missed you, kid.” Said your dad, already digging in.

Dave gave you a look, wondering why you hadn’t told your parents your reason for not being friends.

“I dunno… Just been busy, I guess.” He said quietly.

“Why haven’t you come over?” Your mom asked.

Dave and you looked at each other for a second, “We just didn’t really talk much after freshman year ‘cause we didn’t have any classes together.” You told her, which wasn’t really a lie. You and Dave didn’t have any classes together freshman year.

“That’s sad,” she frowned, “you two were always inseparable.” She smiled at Dave fondly.

Dave only poked at his food, “Yeah,” he said, smiling to himself.

You had finished eating, everyone continuing to converse here and there with their on food still on their plates when you felt Dave’s knee touch your thigh. He didn’t pull away, and neither did you to see what he would do. He only kept talking to your parents, completely ignoring the fact his body was touching yours.

Of course he actually did realize this. In his head he had done it on purpose just to see how you’d react. You tried to stop thinking about it for the rest of dinner.

You weren’t mad or uncomfortable, of course it had happened before, but it felt different somehow. Familiar.

“So have you guys gone on any dates yet?” Asked your mother, out of nowhere.

You froze, staring at her. Dave choked on his drink, coughing over and over again, trying to catch his breath but he didn’t seem to tone it down. His face was red because of this. And other reasons.

“Sorry.” Your mom hid a smile, seeing Dave’s reaction gave her more than enough answers on his part.

She gave you a knowing look and you sent her a look of disgust.

"Gross." You said, repeating Dave's words from earlier that day. Dave finally cleared his throat of whatever he choked on and tried to back you up. His knee wasn't touching you anymore, you noticed.

"What she said," he pointed his thumb at you, voice hoarse.

"You've never even thought about getting together!?" Your mom looked surprised. At this, you couldn't help but do exactly that. What it would be like to go on a date with him, maybe getting a coffee at Atomic Comics, maybe watch the Avengers movie that was about to come out in theaters. What it would be like to hold hands at school, how surprised everyone would be since you guys seemed to hate each other so much. What Cleo would say, what Todd and Marty would say.

What you would have to tell Kick-Ass if he climbed into your window again.

'Hey I know I patched you up and stuff and kinda stopped you from bleeding out, and I know we kissed like three times but guess what?! I have a boyfriend and I can't talk to you anymore.'

And what it would be like to kiss Dave. If he would be any good at it, or if he still hasn't gotten laid because he's too much of a pussy to talk to girls. How it would feel if he had his hands all over you, his lips brushing yours, how it would feel if he was kissing your neck softly—

"You guys have much in common." Your dad smiled slyly at you two, snapping you out of your daydream.

Why had you let your mind wander that far?!

Dave stared at his food, his face an obvious red.

"Okay, that's a wrap..." You cleared your throat, pursing your lips. You excused yourself from the table, picking up your dish and Dave followed, “Thanks for the food,” Dave smiled at your mom as you took your dishes to the sink.

"Sorry about that," you spoke as you approached the top of the stairs.

"I—It's fine." He brushed it off, sitting down on your bed as you shut the door.

It was silent for a few moments as you scrolled through an article on your laptop, Dave reading from his drafts.

"Have you even had your first kiss yet?" You questioned out of the blue.

His eyes shot up, hesitating for a second before regaining his composure.

"Yeah. Sixth grade, remember?" He said proudly. "Have you?"

"Yes, dumbass. You know this." you scoffed.

"With who?"

"Remember Freddy? The brunet guy that called you a nerd in second grade and you never got over it? He was my first boyfriend."

"Lame." He rolled his eyes. "Smart-mouth like him I bet it was the best kiss you ever had." He shot.

"Wrong. Best kiss I ever had was with Kick-Ass." You crossed your arms sassily.

It was safe to say that Dave was flattered. "Oh really? You don't even know him though, so it doesn't really count."

"Maybe I don't know who he is, but I do know that he actually likes me. I just have to find out who he is. He’s probably hot or whatever…”

Dave blinked in awe. "He might not like you… He could just be using you. Why are you kissing random guys anyway? Are you really that desperate…?”

“No?! He just made it obvious, okay? And why are you getting all weird? Are you jealous…?”

“Me? Jealous of him? Fuck no, I’d rather be stitched up by a damn chimp than you with your terrible needle skills.”

You paused. “How did you know I needed to stitch him up…?”

He was able to answer before hesitating, “Cleo told us when you left for fourth period.”

“Fine whatever. Just piss off dude, at least I talk to the opposite sex.” You huffed.

He stared at you for a moment and you laughed at his expression, himself joining you soon after. A few moments later you noticed yourself looking at him too often. Like you were expecting him to say something.

“…What?” Dave slowly looked up at you from his notebook, noticing your lasting gaze.

“I—“ you thought for a moment, figuring out a way to explain yourself. Suddenly, you sat closer to him, pulling his glasses off his face before putting them on yourself.

“Holy shit, you’re blind.” You teased.

“Shut up.” He scoffed, “you’re exaggerating.”

You took a moment to look at him, noticing the big difference without his glasses. Dave watched you expectantly.

“You look weird with glasses.” A smirk threatened to creep up on his lips. You only scoffed.

“And here I was thinking you looked cuter without them.”

He blinked, losing his words and you began to notice a pink upon his face. He laughed nervously, swallowing whatever was in his throat as he looked away at his notebook, trying to pretend like he didn’t hear you.

You smiled, feeling a sudden urge to tease him in a flirty way. “Did you hear what I said?”

Dave looked back up at you. “What?”

“You should wear contacts. You have really pretty eyes.” You looked at his lips for a moment, licking your own, picturing yourself kissing Dave.

“Um… Thanks…” His heart rate began to quicken as he tried keeping his gaze on you, noticing how you looked at his lips. All of a sudden, he grew bold, looking at your lips too.

“What are you looking at?” He asked curiously.

You blinked and looked up at his eyes, adjusting the glasses on the bridge of your nose. “Nothing.”

“You know… I had a crush on you in eighth grade.” He whispered.

You laughed, “What?”

He chuckled, “Yeah, I don’t know how my taste was that terrible at any point in my life.” He tutted.

“Fuck you.” You laughed softly. “You’re such an asshole, you know that?”

He held back a smile, tracing his eyes over your features.

The two of you stared at each other for what felt like an eternity until you felt yourself being pulled closer to him. He leaned towards you as well until his face was just a few inches from yours, his hand resting next to your leg to hold himself up.

Finally, he began closing the distance, trying to ease into it as if not to scare you. His lips barely made it to yours before you pulled away, removing his glasses from your face and placing them back on his with a smile.

“We should finish this…” You sighed.

His face was noticeably red again, especially from the embarrassment of you pulling away. He felt like an idiot, thinking you actually wanted to kiss him. He didn’t question you or anything, but he still wanted to understand why you’d lure him in like that only to rip it from his grasp.

"Oh fuck, it's already ten past nine," spoke Dave, putting his things away.

"I would say you could sleep over like you used to, but I don't want my parents saying shit like that ever again. Plus Kick-Ass could come over and I don’t want him to think I’m with a nerd or whatever.” You teased.

Giggling, he stood up with his bag in hand, you followed him to the front door.

"Thanks for having me," he smiled as he walked past your parents in the living room. He opened the door for you, stepping out after you.

"Thanks for studying with me... And dinner." He spoke softly, giving a small smile.

"Yeah..." You stood in front of him, admiring his features as he towered over you. He had a strong jaw, soft plump lips, a cute nose, perfect eyebrows (for a guy), and beautiful blue eyes behind his glasses. His curls fell over his forehead—were you looking at him too long? You felt like a creep for just staring at him for what felt like hours. You knew it had to be weird. But what you didn't know was that he was admiring you too.

He was standing so close, close enough for you to right hook him. You looked at his eyes 'til you caught him glancing at your lips. He wanted to kiss you again, like he did yesterday, but he knew he couldn't. Not as himself, at least.

For some strange reason you moved closer to him, not knowing why or what your motive was.

"See you Monday." He took a step back, pursing his lips with his hands shoved in his pockets.

"We—You can come over tomorrow if you want...?" You tried, but to do what? Why did you want him back here again so soon?

"Uh—I have stuff this weekend... But I'll text you if any plans change..." He slowly walked backwards onto the sidewalk. He felt bad for lying again. He couldn't keep this up much longer.

———————

SLOW BURN MUTHAFUCKAS 🗣️🔥🔥

TAGS BC YOU ASKED!! @iliterallydontexistlol @esmestarz @pernandofalonso @lizzxoxo @real-sharena-h @iheartdilfs01 @friendlyneighborhoodhottie @popejar

[the-moon-files]

YESSSSS I BEG GET INTO THE CULTURAL DIDFERENCES BETWEEN HYLIANS AND HUMANS 🙏🙏

...now ur just sweet talking me 🥰 /lh

Not years, well maybe 1 year-

but i have wanted to ramble desperately to smone, even the tumblr void if i had to, abt humans vs. hylians so much, esp with a guide reader or male reader bc whatdya know im into niche stuff that only u and like 2 other ppl like lmao ¯\(ツ)/¯

Anyway im so shocked, since ur like the third person to be interested in this and wanna hear abt it 🥺 🤲💌 here u go!! Hope u like it <333 👉👈

Sun: Masc!Reader (he/him)

Orbit: Humans are Not Hylians/Humans are Space Orcs AU, Headcanons-ish, long overall but each section is kinda short

Stars: Mostly worldbuilding! you've been warned, don't get mad me for not talking abt the boys too much✌️

Comets & Meteors: Content Warnings: mild cursing, mentions of private area/joke in the clothing headcanons, & Trigger Warnings: none known.

Please comment if I missed any. /gen

☆

just some quick headcanons bc tbh i haven't given it too much thought, and i feel like I've been able to somewhat get into it in other posts? or maybe im thinking of stuff i have in my drafts idk-

Imma make another list, so buckle up for the short ride lol

Courting periods/dating/marriage

individual/small groups society-based hylians v. large personal groups/large community society-based humans

simpler foods hylians v. complex food humans

clothing modesty/style/relationships with fashion

fighting styles/strategies

entertainment complexity/differences

and language

☆

1st one, not much yet, im also making a separate post bc someone else asked me to talk abt that more 🥺

(tysm for all the enthusiastic asks guys <33)

anyway, basically hylian courting is a lot shorter, think “lesbians with the uhaul” type of energy, like sort of the classical medieval “does thee wish to pursue marriage with this one?” ← how hylians ask u out for the first time lmao

if it helps, they do tend to get to know one another well, talking about morals/kids/life goals/preferred lifestyle/house/etc. pretty clearly and quickly, then using the in between time to sort of stew on that information

id say the total time is sort of something like 6 months? maybe 3/4 if they're really compatible

(so bc i love interpreting video game logic for real world building, I actually blame this on how fast Zelda/link get together in games despite having sometimes never met before that moment lol)

like i said, ill be posting about this later

2nd one!!

pretty basic, just saying we don't really see hylians in big groups, despite the organizations they form, like kingdoms/knights or on a more personal level, towns/families/etc.

(once again, in-game appearances/video game logic translated to real life to draw these conclusions)

like not only are family units pretty small, like nuclear family setup, with like 2 parents and 2 kids, or single parent 1 kid type of situation, but the towns or collections of these families arent very big either

hylians kind of use their government the way it was intended lmao?

like the villages and towns matter more for everyday decisions than the kingdom/royalty, like Zelda would esstientally just be the mayor of Castle Town for those constant decisions,

while occasionally is called on to make decisions like for several towns or like is a natural disaster happens

meanwhile humans are, in comparison, in Way Bigger groups, both on an organization scale, and a personal scale

like u have all these specific branches of government, whereas im sure the population difference doesn't help,

and on a personal level, humans can easily have like multiple parents, lots of siblings, and once u combine that with each parent having family too, and those families like to meet up? All together??

yeah, itd look insane to any hylians (who’s smaller extended family may just make up their own village and that's it)

3. I've touched on this

like the use of spices, syrups, seasonings, etc

but also the complexity of dishes too, like chilling cream and mixing it for awhile to make ice cream, or even just getting ordering a pizza,

that's a lot of processing, like making the dough from flour and other ingredients, to letting it rise, to making the tomato paste, making cheese, then combining those things with any other toppings, all into one dish??

i like to think that hylians have only just started to touch on actual complicated cooking processes (as in BOTW, where they sell flour and salt, so people besides Link/Wild must know what to do with it)

this has the advantage of impressing any hylian with what a “creative genius” you are lol

4. look im just a fan of medieval time periods Links

so i think its funny if the hylians are used to like 4/3 layers and ur over here like, “wym, if i take off my shirt there's nothing underneath?”

one of them gets bold enough to ask, “d-do you not. do you not have undergarments??”

you “just my boxers? like just to cover my di-”

also this makes its easy to seduce people here? LMAO

clothes are def higher quality, after all there's not as many artificial processes or materials interfering,

plus u usually get some sick embroidery on it too!!

5. so like i get it, Link is the main fighter in games

but like, the few times there is a war/army in loz games, there's rlly not a lot of strategy, beyond just finding the enemy and fighting

tho im partial to that hylians/most inhabitants of Hyrule abide by the “lets meet up either literally by inviting each other or just between our territories to fight”

with occasional guerilla warfare (by any means necessary/stealth/ambush attacks/strategy) that's only rlly used either by Demise/Ganon, or by the wilder individuals/races in games

or maybe even the more civilized fighters in an emergency

and so that means by this logic that all of the Chain use kind of wild techniques compared to their race/kingdom lmao

id imagine its not too surprising to also see “every fight is a bar fight if its for my life” from individual travelers, so im sure they're not viewed too crazy (esp when ppl know their the hero that constantly has to deal with guerilla warfare from Ganon)

but its be hilarious to watch the reactions of both the Links realizing they’re in a bigger group that should be using “proper” fighting strategies and seeing the general publics reaction to this absolutely feral, armed to the teeth, trained hylians with their equally wild human lol

LMAO everyone thinks ur the reason they started using the more brutal fighting methods bc ur human, ur a bad influence lol

(humans would use it primarily, esp after we converted to use that method in warfare a couple hundred years ago i think?)

changing course a bit, hylians tend to use weapons (to compensate for difference in strength compared to humans, and since they don't experience/get a lesser version of adrenaline)

while humans tend to equally rely on weapons and our body as a weapon (marital arts/basic self-defense)

6. this is mostly bc the hylians only rlly seem to have the basics of music, books/stories, theater, and art

i have, surprise surprise, another post abt how i think this came to be,

mostly based on how human curiosity is indomitable and insatiable and the endless force that has not yet met its immovable object.

or at least an immovable object they haven't at least poked a little, out of curiosity lol

like we went to space for that reason, we reach the most dangerous corners of our planet (deep underwater/volcanoes) out of sheer curiousity/for the sake of simple knowledge of the thing

so needless to say, curiosity can absolutely drive any field to its limits, including the arts, which is why we can have stained glass, or movies/tv shows, hell, the marvel that is Hatsune Miku lmao

(fully for entertainment, a projection of light and sound, what is essentially magical illusions but u did it hte hard way, to the hylians)

on a different entertainment related note, i don't know if the hylians would be super into sports, or not really at all? mostly bc they have to use their fighting/training against real threats, not the sort of “fake” threats that sports are

but on the other hand i could see people like knights wanting to use their abilities for something other than violence and fighting bc their life or their villages lives depended on it

bet the Links would enjoy it for those reasons especially, what with at least sumo wrestling being a sport or activity for them at some point in history, and practically beg u for any new games to play, or to ref their games, bc whewwww

im sure they could get pretty competitive lol

7. obviously, their mostly influenced by the Japanese language

id almost like to imagine a sort of, if not outright Japanese (like with earlier heroes like Sky) then a sort of English-Japanese hybrid further along the line

sort of like how English has German/Greek/Latin roots and therefore u can see what words or structure comes from where, or even how u can understand a fair amount of basic words when other languages share the same roots (english, pants = spanish, pantalones)

would make for some funny miscommunications

or even better, most hylians liking ur unique accent or the Links love to hear u talk bc of it lol

☆

well the fever has broken, i am now free of the sickness that made me hack this up geez

i hope u got some enjoyment out of these my beloved anon!! esp since u were so nice as to ask abt it <33

hope u guys have a great weekend, look out for some more posts, bc its been great to get some more asks in lately and very motivating,

not to mention i actually have time to write now that my siblings graduated/we’ve moved several states over 💀

so i have reliable internet now too! sheesh :’)

Peace out,

🌙

[tsxkkis]

# tsukishima kei - no words exchanged

a/n = i had two bigger tests today and i studied for both of them a lot BUT i think i did well?? let's hope so cuz i'll die if i end up failing them fr... ALSO idk abt this one cuz i didn't have much time to write lately (which resulted in me being dissatisfied with everything i write) but i hope you like it anyways ^^

summary = a school project finally bonds you with the tall blonde from your friend group.

warnings = none tbh, except for kinda ooc tsukki?

if someone had no bigger knowledge of tsukishima kei as a person, they would immediately assume he was greatly annoyed by your presence.

your rambling seemed to not have an end, the excitement in your voice and sparkly eyes clearly indicating just how into the conversation you really were. tsukishima glanced over to your side for a spare second, the sight of you happily explaining something to hinata and yamaguchi in a high-pitched voice gracing his eyes, taking in every bit of emotion in your face, every word you said.

ever since you became karasuno's manager along with yachi, tsukishima has been stuck with that weird feeling inside his gut, one that he so desperately tried to get rid of from the very moment he made notice of it. he couldn't afford himself to waste time on such stupid things as love; or maybe, more precisely, he didn't want to admit to himself he was actually feeling that way towards someone.

on the contrary, you actively thought that tsukishima kei hated you.

for you, the quick glances he stole your way were nothing but an indicator of being annoyed by the amount of words that left your mouth, and it didn't help you were the only person he never directed his snarky comments to. in fact, he didn't even speak to you, almost at all; aside from an occasional small talk with him and yamaguchi or greeting you at school.

out of your entire friend group, it was always the most awkward between you two, a surprising fact when you considered that even someone such as kageyama talked with tsukishima more in his life than you have. and if you were being completely honest, it made you a tad bit sad.

and if things couldn't get worse than they already were, a project for chemistry class with random partners hit you like a smack to the face.

"it's a good thing, though, don't you think so, yamaguchi?" yachi's voice echoed from beside you, the dark-haired boy giving her a nod and a little hum in response. "maybe the two of you will finally bond a little."

"yeah, if we even exchange a word." you murmured, feet carrying you to your locker as you took out the books you needed for your next class.

you couldn't deny that maybe yachi was right. maybe it was the chance you needed to finally break the ice of awkwardness between you two, to finally act like actual friends.

as you parted your ways with yachi, the blonde girl going to her class, your eyes caught a glimpse of a different blonde, much taller, walking out of the bathroom and towards you and yamaguchi.

"[name]."

you almost flinched at the sound of your name from his mouth, and yet something in the way he said it sounded so warm and familiar. your eyes met his as you fully turned your body around towards the boy, head turned slightly upward as you waited for him to continue speaking.

"we should probably meet after school sometime this week to do the project."

you fiddled with your fingers as you stood in tsukishima's doorway, an unsure look on your face as you tried your best not to overthink the situation too much. it couldn't go wrong, right? it's just a project for school. maybe you and him will actually get along.

as you caught a glimpse of tsukishima's frame on the other side of the door, a small smile appeared on your face, the boy waiting for you to take off your shoes before motioning for you to follow him, heading inside his room.

not a word exchanged.

his room was none other than what you expected it to be; everything was neat and organized, and it looked almost untouched. as you sat down on the edge of the bed, eyes still roaming through the unfamiliar place you were in, a small detail occurred to you.

"you have a collection of dinosaur figurines?"

tsukishima tried to hide his embarrassment, but it was evident the second you noticed how the tips of his ears turned red when hearing your question.

"so what?" he cleared his throat, voice as nonchalant as possible as he opened his laptop, sitting down at his desk.

"nothing." you mumbled, eyes following his movements. "i think it's sweet."

he only hummed in response, fingers swiftly moving across the keyboard as he typed in something into the internet, silence taking over the room; so thick you doubt you would've been able to cut it with a perfectly sharpened knife.

ten minutes passed, and tsukishima still didn't seem even remotely interested in starting a conversation with you, a fact that both annoyed and worried you. ignoring the "bonding experience" yachi mentioned it could be for you two, you also had a school project to do.

and that project wasn't even touched yet.

"you know, if you didn't want to work with me, you could've always switched partners."

tsukishima, although taken aback by your question, gave you only a slight shrug in response, seated with his back facing you.

"i wanted to work with you." his words confused you, eyes glued to the back of his purple t-shirt as you tried to process what he could possibly mean by that.

"you hate me, though." you mumbled, barely loud enough for the blonde haired boy to hear you. this time, he did turn around to face you; and as much as you tried, you couldn't exactly understand the emotions behind the expression he had. he looked like he didn't believe what he just heard and, to some extent, that was the truth.

his eyes were fixated on your face, a rare occurrence considering that most of the time the two of you wouldn't even share eye contact.

"i don't."

"you don't really do anything to prove that."

he sighed, hand instinctively going to brush through his hair.

"i'm not used to having friends." his words echoed through the room. "let alone friends like you."

you didn't quite understand what he meant, looking at him with a confused look painted on your face.

"you're loud, and annoying, and you talk so much it makes me wanna throw myself out the window." his words hit you like a knife through your heart. the remains of a faint smile immediately dissapearing from your face. but from what it looked like, he wasn't close to being done talking.

"and yet i can't seem to hate you at all. you make all those traits seem like the most loveable things on the planet."

he stopped for a couple of seconds, as if trying to decide what to say next. tsukishima wasn't used to talking a lot, and talking to you greatly stressed him, as much as he wanted to deny it.

"i don't hate you, [name]. don't make me repeat myself again." he finally added, trying to come back to his usual, cold demeanor. but you could still feel the bits of softness left in his voice, the faintest shade of pink gracing his cheeks.

you smiled, seeing as he turned back to his laptop, typing away again.

"i won't, don't worry." you said, standing up to look at whatever tsukishima was writing down, a grin on your face. "but i am telling kageyama about your dinosaur figurine collection."

he turned to you abruptly, a sight of annoyance mixed with an amused smile on his face, almost as if he enjoyed the playful comment from you.

"don't you even dare."

taglist: @ox1-lovesick @moonswolfie @wyrcan

[blarshwritezz]

hi if u dont mind i would love a mafia x male spy reader (gn if you ur not comfy with that) so the mafia boss pretends to be the mission partner for the reader just for fun he almist kileed the reader on multiple occasions but the reader misunderstands and thinks that the mafia boss was just helping him albeit in a weird and rather violent way and although reader has a suspicion that his partner (the mafia boss) isnt who he says he is due to skme odd similarities between him and the target of his mission (that being the Mafia boss) and the fact that his partner could easily waltz in notorious criminals manors and party and one day everything just clicks for the reader and they try to escape but the mafia boss knew thus so he kidnapped em and the live happily ever after (idk how to end this so just do what you deem fit ty!!!)

(oh yeah its fine if ur not comfortable or just don't want to make my request im not paying you so you hqbe no obligations to do so remember to take care of yourself <333 /p)

(and if i could could i become 🦀 anon)

Yes! Welcome, 🦀 anon!

Yandere Mafia Boss x Spy Reader

M yan x gn reader (sorry, I prefer to do gn for non-nsfw asks)

TW - general yandere behavior, drugging, implied kidnapping

Your mission was simple, at least on paper. Simply gain intel on a notorious mafia boss. But if it was that easy, you wouldn't have been working at it for so long.

It didn't help that your partner for this mission was...unusual. Not a bad guy, really, just strange. Sometimes you almost thought he was trying to kill you. You'd often catch him staring at you. You even felt his gaze when you swore no one was around.

Not to mention, danger was ever prevalent around him. He always managed to save you, though. But his face did often look rather annoyed...you just assumed he was one of those people with a really bad rbf.

But it was also suspicious how he was able to so easily and casually waltz into the homes or parties of very high-profile people. People you'd never be able to get near without months of careful planning. Maybe he just had good connections?

But all these coincidences were getting a bit too...convenient. If you needed to get in somewhere, he got you in the front gate. If you needed something, he miraculously had it only a day or two after at the latest.

And worst of all, you still haven't managed to track down this damn mafia boss! It didn't help that nobody knew what he looked like.

"Maybe he's right under your nose." His deep voice startled you out of your thoughts. His arm was wrapped around your shoulder, holding you close. Despite his cold exterior, he was pretty touchy and clingy. But...sort of sweet. You were glad to have met him, even if this mission was looking like a bust.

"But where? Where haven't we checked?"

"Well, our organization may be high security, but not impossible to infiltrate for a man like that." Was he implying that one of your own coworkers could be your target? Impossible!

But...now it all seemed to come together. Those coincidences...weren't just coincidences. He really has been right under your nose this whole time.

No wonder he could go wherever he wanted and get anything he desired. He had power and influence...more than you thought.

"I-Impossible! Our organization has the highest security possible! I'd know if someone like that could be...beside me..." It was a sad attempt to cover up your newest theory, but also to try and reassure yourself. If this was true, then you weren't as good of a spy as you thought...

You got up, or tried to at least. He kept his grip tight on you.

He knew.

"I can't just let you go now. You know my identity. So I'll just have to keep you as my newest little toy." In seconds his arm lowered to prevent you from moving your arms as he quickly used his other to cover your mouth and nose with a rag.

Chloroform.

"Just sleep...Be a good pet and I'll be sure to reward you very well..." Despite your struggling, sleep soon took you. No one ever heard from you again...no one but him, of course.

I'm sorry, this one feels so rushed and short, I was having a tough time getting inspired 😭

Forgive me, 🦀 anon, for I have failed

[bringinubackto2014]

How the creepypasta's would be in a relationship.

Jeff The Killer

•He's probably the worst to date tbh. I don't see him as a misunderstood uwu boy, no he's manic. He'd get less assholey the longer you were together though, but in the beginning expect being insulted more than greeted

•He wouldn't be physically affectionate either. Maybe you'll get to hug him once or twice, but for the first year or so if you try to initiate something expect to be pushed away. But maybe once he trusts you (it'll take years) then he'll cuddle you once in a blue moon.

•A goodish thing about dating him instead of the others, he doesn't get jealous, and if he does its only a little bit. He probably wont care too much if you do leave him, but if he grows it love you A LOT he'll just kill whoever tried to take you, simple as that. (just an extra thing I feel like he'd want to give you the mouth scar he has to claim you as his)

overall rating 5/10, it would suck dating but he's hot so ill give him that

Eyeless Jack

•He's really quiet, so don't expect verbal praises or compliments too much. But he's definitely more loving than Jeff. But he probably loves way more easily, it'll take a good 9 months for him to realize that he doesn't ever want to kill or eat you, and that he's found someone he cares for.

•He's super strong and tall, maybe around 8 feet. But he has a sleeper build (idk if that's the right term), this dude looks skinny but he could crush your head with two of his fingers if he wanted to. So he always has to be gentle, he'd be really scared of touching you at first

•Before he found love in being affectionate with you, he would offer you organs (how sweet), to be honest, he'd probably want to propose by giving you a ring stuck in a kidney. (He's a true romantic)

overall rating 7/10 he's great but your gonna have to drive everywhere since he's blind and the smell of human organs get a little gross sometimes

Ticci Toby

•He says that he doesn't trust people at first, that might be true but when he met you. oh God his trauma spilled out so fast. He didn't mean to spill it but it just kinda came out

•Once he found out that he could trust you he loved you with all his heart. He gets really shy but he'll compliment you all the time under his breathe. He wouldn't anitiate hugs/cuddles or anything and it'll take him a while to get comfy with it. But once he does he'll never want to stop holding you

•He has a lot of anxiety attacks and mental breakdowns. Do NOT touch him when thats happening, he can't control himself. So he'll either hide in the woods or sit in Jack's room until he feels better

overall rating 9/10 he's pretty much perfect other than the breakdown things, but he goes on TikTok and I feel like he goes thought depressed vent pages (like the ones made by kids who got yelled at their parents once.) and he quotes them a lot so its kinda annoying

Jane (she's mine guys sorry)

•Kinda like Jack she's very quiet and distant. It takes FORVER to get her to trust you so until then expect one sided convos. Once she does open up she'll express her love verbally, but rarely and she speaks so quiet its hard to hear

•She's a writer, she'll write you love letters, in the beginning she'll hide them, but eventually she'll let you read some. Only some. She'll also write poems as well, she would make a whole book of poems she wrote for you.

•It'll take months for her to take her mask off, she'll need constant reassurance about her face and her scars. If you do her makeup in the style of her mask (gothic kinda) she would marry you. right then and there

overall rating 10/10 nothing is wrong with that perfect woman

[saiintofdiirt]

Summary: Parrot and Wifies have a talk some time after the fallout of Parrot finding out Wifies is a clone. A follow up to Ken's POV in Part 1.

notes: this is once again not edited, this was the result of some quick writing last night and a wrap up today. it's more like practice for Parrot's voice which i think i did a shit job at but it's here and u can now judge me urself. enjoy. or dont idk. divider from here

word count: 2568. just slightly less than the previous installment.

11:49

Parrot has picked through his feathers so many times he thinks he’s developing a bald spot in his left wing. He's usually better at waiting, has patience for his plans to go through, but today there is no plan, just waiting. He stares at his comm, open in his hand as he rereads the chat over and over again.

[Wifies]: Would you be open to talking with me today?

[Parrotx2]: yes

[Parrotx2]: of course

[Parrotx2]: what’s up

[Wifies]: I was actually wondering if we could meet up.

[Parrotx2]: yeah wherever you want

[Wifies]: I’ll open up my world.

[Wifies]: How does noon sound?

[Parrotx2]: perfect

[Wifies]: I’ll send you the IP then.

[Parrotx2]: great!

Great! He sounds like a loser.

So Parrot is waiting for the clock to strike noon on his comm to go. Part of him wonders if he's going to spawn into a pit, or straight into lava, or in an escape room, something that would make Wifies feel better to watch him go through after the hell Parrot raised. Parrot would be fine with that. Honestly, he hopes Wifies is mad. He's only going to feel worse if he's met with Wifies’s carefully thought out words and blunt kindness.

11:54

He stops touching his wings. He's been trying to organize his thoughts so he doesn't say something incredibly stupid to Wifies again. There’s a script now.

I’m sorry for reacting so harshly, I was shocked and didn’t know how to process what I was hearing. I felt hurt because I thought you didn’t trust me with the truth, but now I see why you wanted to keep it to yourself. I should have never acted that way. You’re so important to me, and I should have thought about all the trust between us. I always trust you.

11:55

It’s simple, but it’s straightforward, and he wants to be as clear as possible. He also wants to be sincere, but sincerity is scary. His sincerity is blue, bruised, gushes forward like an open wound and stains the world in his blood.

11:56

But he can do sincerity. He can do it for Wifies. He could probably do a lot for Wifies, but Wifies never asks for anything. He didn’t even ask to be freed from the chunkban. He just waited. Trusted Parrot, and waited for Parrot, and was happy to see Parrot after everything. Wifies is always trusting and waiting and happy.

11:57

And Parrot ruined it for what? Catharsis for his fears? A moment to let that horrible feeling of being second, third, fourth in someone's life tear through everything he’s done? Is that even the reason why?

11:58

God. When Wifies starts asking questions, Parrot is going to crumble like a house of cards. It'll be Parrot's unjust luck to be forgiven.

[Wifies]: IP XXXXXXXXXX

Parrot jolts and almost drops his comm. He scrambles to copy the IP down and flick through his comm settings. He pastes it into the server IP box and hovers over the connect button.

12:00

He clicks connect.

Landing softly onto a carpet of podzol in a chilly spruce forest, Parrot lets out a plume of ashen breath. There are a few cabins in a semicircle in front of him, warm light spilling out of each window and from the branches of the towering spruce trees. The afternoon sun barely breaches the canopy, but it speckles the ground just enough to give the world a surreal atmosphere.

There's a campfire pit to one side surrounded by log benches, and there sits Wifies. He looks brilliant in the firelight, dark hair loose without his headband and violet eyes muted.

“Parrot,” Wifies calls out as he stands up. “Hey.”

“Hi,” Parrot says lamely, hesitating for a moment before making his way over to Wifies. The campfire warms him up, but the chill doesn't go away. “How are you?”

“It’s going to rain soon, so I’m feeling it in my joints,” Wifies says, lighthearted as he rubs one of his shoulders. “Sit with me.”

So Parrot does. He’s not in the business of denying Wifies much of anything. He sits on one end of the log bench, and Wifies sits two feet away, turned towards Parrot, and Parrot looks at him, and his mind just— it blanks. His script dissolves like salt in the sea.

“I wanted to start with saying that I am a clone of the original Wifies,” Wifies says, giving Parrot space to try and reboot his brain. “He was. . . making clones for the sake of content, and I was the most successful one. I never knew. And one day, Ken showed up to what I thought was my single player world, and. . . it’s a very long story, but he got me out of there and we, um, we killed the original. He. . . wasn’t going to let me just leave. And those are the main points of my story. I just wanted you to know the important bits before we talk further.”

“Clones for content,” Parrot echoes, eyebrows scrunching up. “Clones for content? He was— what?”

“Making clones to put them into escape rooms for quick video production.”

“The— what the fuck?”

Wifies smiles awkwardly, but doesn’t speak again. He keeps rubbing his shoulder over and over, self soothing maybe, or maybe it’s just that painful from the onset of the rain.

“I'm sorry for how I acted. I don’t care that you’re a clone,” Parrot says, flinching at his own sharpness. He looks away and into the crackling fire. “I care about you. The clone stuff is— is whatever. Or not whatever, I’ll care about it as much as you want me to care about it.”

“Parrot, don’t make me promises you know you can’t keep.”

Wifies’s voice is gentle. It is so, so gentle, with no hint of disappointment or scolding. Parrot’s stomach churns. He wishes again for Wifies’s anger, pointed and cold, instead of this. Anger is easy. This stings like salt in a wound.

“Why do you think I can’t keep to that?”

“Not knowing drives you crazy.”

“You not being there has driven me more crazy.”

“Until you forget, and it starts bothering you again.”

Parrot deserves it, but his heart is heavy and he feels like he’s been shot right through it. Wifies isn’t even being cruel, just honest; he’s right, eventually it will drive Parrot crazy to not be able to talk about the whole situation, to understand Wifies better by prying into his life.

“I don’t like talking about it. It was a bad time for me. I also don’t know everything about. . . myself. About what you’ll eventually ask.”

Parrot has to physically bite his tongue. Wifies doesn't know everything. What if he gets sick? Or badly hurt? What if he starts feeling like something is wrong, and there's nothing to be done for it, because nobody knows? What if—

“This is why I never want to tell anyone,” Wifies sighs out, curling in on himself in the corner of Parrot’s eyes. “If nothing else, just promise me you won't tell anyone?”

“Never,” Parrot says firmly. That's a promise he can keep. “I would never.”

“Thank you, Parrot.”

Their conversation tapers off. The sunlight is disappearing little by little, the promised rain clouds rolling in from far away, far above. Parrot’s feathers puff up a bit at a slight, churning breeze that cuts through the forest.

“I'm sorry, for what it's worth. For lying this whole time.”

“I see why you did. I just ended up proving why lying was the right choice. Nothing to be sorry about.”

“It's funny,” Wifies says in a voice that promises to be anything but funny. “When I'm scared, everything hurts again. I can never remember how they got here, but all the little pains come back again, like the reminder of fear should pull a memory or two up. But there's nothing. I don't remember how I hurt my shoulder this badly. I don't remember how it got fixed. All I remember is that it’s hurt forever. I don't remember a life without pain, and when this all came to light, my reality went from a life where pain existed to a life that was lived with pain.”

Rain begins to dribble through the leaves around them. The campfire hisses and sparks but doesn't extinguish, too large and hot to be daunted by such a pathetic display. The canopy is too dense for the rain to punch through in earnest.

“What are you scared of?” Parrot forces himself to ask. Please don't be afraid of me.

“Losing another part of my life to this. I can never seem to escape the factory. What a lousy escapist I've become, huh?”

Wifies pulls his feet up into the log, resting his chin on his knee and watching the fire. Parrot doesn't remember turning towards him, but he inches closer. The space between them is too large. His hand is too far from Wifies’s own.

“You don't have to lose anything,” Parrot says. “There's nothing to be lost. You can always come back to the server. Nobody there will ever know except for Ken.”

“No matter how this plays out, I lose you.”

“I'm right here. I'm right next to you, right now, what do you mean?”

Parrot feels pathetic, but he doesn't care. Wifies won't look at him, is talking about losing him like Parrot isn't about to crawl out of his skin just so Wifies won't leave him again. The rain thickens the air around them with the promise of more force, and Parrot stretches a wing over Wifies’s head without a single thought.

“You'll always think about the fact I'm a clone. I lost my status of human. I lost our relationship. It took so long for me to feel normal, and now it's all gone.”

“Wifies, look at me please.”

Wifies does. He does, because he still cares, and Parrot is going to be sick at the resigned look in Wifies’s eyes. Parrot is close enough now, so he reaches out and holds Wifies’s face in both hands. He can feel the way Wifies’s jaw works, the thrum of his slow heartbeat in his throat, the way his breathing is shallow and quick. His eyes are a little glassy, a little red, and Parrot adds another wretched tally to the list of times he's made Wifies cry.

“No matter what, you are human, okay? To me, and to Ken, and I'm sure to whoever you were talking to that day as well. Don't ever doubt that.”

Wifies’s expression softens and he just barely nods, which is a small relief for Parrot.

“All I ever think about when you're gone is when you're coming back,” Parrot says. His sincerity bleeds, red and blue smudged across each word. He’ll bleed for them, every drop if that’s what it takes. “And all I've been thinking about this whole time is how I'm going to make it up to you. How I really, really want to do whatever it takes for you to stay. I want you to stay. And not a single one of those thoughts had anything to do with whether you're a clone or not.”

Wifies breathes in. It shakes something horrible. Parrot will crawl his way back into being trusted until he has no more body to move with.

“All of those thoughts had to do with how you've always been with me. Funny, kind, snarky, quick, the only person in this world I've ever been able to close my eyes next to knowing that I've got everything I need right there. That the only way I'll ever be apart from you is by being torn. And none of that, none of it, has changed. I still think all that about you. All that's been added is that I'm an asshole who definitely doesn't deserve your loyalty, but I'm too greedy to let it go so easily.”

That makes Wifies giggle, the sound wet and cracking. Parrot presses the pads of his thumbs under Wifies's eyes. If he's going to make Wifies cry, the least he can do is clean it up too.

“The only thing I ever need you to do is believe in me,” Parrot says, pressing his lips to Wifies’s forehead. It's easier somehow to speak like this, wetness pooling against Parrot’s fingers. “Believe that I love you so much. Believe that I'm going to make this right between us. Believe that learning this has done nothing to change how I feel about you. And if you can't, please believe in me anyway.”

“Of course I believe in you Parrot,” Wifies murmurs, voice crackling. “Why else would I follow you everywhere?”

“I'm that persuasive?”

“Hardly.”

“Hey, not even a little?”

Wifies laughs. It’s a sweet sound. When Parrot pulls back to look, Wifies has his eyes closed, and he’s not quite smiling, but he’s not frowning either, which is a win. 

“You’re determined and direct,” Wifies says, letting the full weight of his head loll into Parrot’s hands. Parrot raises his other wing so they're encompassed by green and red and blue. “Which is what made me agree to help you at first. But then. . . I don’t know. You can be charming when you want to be. Not often, but on occasion.”

Parrot squawks indignantly just to hear Wifies laugh again. Wifies blinks his eyes open, and Parrot wipes away a stray tear.

“Do you know how touchy you are?” Wifies asks suddenly.

“Should I let go?”

“No, I just wonder if you know that. When you were upset, you made a real effort to not reach out. That’s how I knew it was serious.”

“Well, now you know it’s not serious.”

“Mm, this is serious too in its own way. You’re serious that you want me to stay.”

Parrot lifts Wifies’s head so that they’re eye to eye, bloodshot violet to his own green-blue blur, and says, “Deadly serious. I don’t want to be separated like this again. Knowing I had hurt you and couldn’t make it better? The absolute worst time of my life, I think.”

“It sucked,” Wifies agrees, finally cracking a smile. “It’s over now though. I think.”

“Of course it's over now, you're never allowed to leave me like that again,” Parrot scolds him entirely lighthearted and Wifies snorts.

“Don't yell at me again and I won't.”

“I won't, I'm sorry for yelling.”

Wifies laughs again, and despite the fact he's clearly reveling in having Parrot wrapped around his finger like this, Parrot can't even pretend to be annoyed. Wifies won't leave him again. It's all that matters right now. Any question or doubt dies a quiet death when Wifies reaches up to hold both of Parrot’s wrists in a loose grip.

“This is weirdly nice,” Wifies says, closing his eyes again. “I don't think anyone's ever touched my face so gently. I can't remember the feeling.”

“You just say when,” Parrot replies.

He's not being entirely selfless here— there's something soothing about running the pads of his thumbs over Wifies’s skin, like a promise that this moment is as real as when he left. Wifies can't leave him when they're like this, tangled up under Parrot’s wings under the rain.

“Then for just a bit longer,” Wifies says, and Parrot agrees. Just a bit longer.

[teddykaczynski]

theres someone i want to connect with who lives on campus so bad but idk... the best way to....

it feels like a violation of ferpa to me to email someone using their student email which ive gotten off of the student info database i have access to through my work. but its also true if youre in your own student email and you begin typing someones name her email will come up. and like, student email isnt the most protected of info. soooo maybe its fine. but then what do i say.

i really enjoyed running into you in the elevator while i was moving out of that building and i remember how you were disappointed to learn i was moving out not in.... not sure if you noticed me then but when we were both on the same tram car while i was en route to pride and then we got off at the same stop, well i liked your carabiner and bulldog harness. and then part of me is like oh well maybe we will just actually really meet more organically sometime and holding out for that is the better call but its also. more cowardly and i hate that. i didnt ever attempt contact with mr carseatheadrest and im pretty sure he either graduated or just isnt coming back so. missed chance there. and i hate that. but i do know ms bulldogharness is continuing to be on campus and in school and is also younger than me soooo.

also when we first met i thought she was an ftm bc i could tell from her voice she had been on T but looking at her info in the portal, of the 3 "gender" options she chose neutral and has no pronouns selected and i dont like to conclude someone is an ftm unless he either tells me or has some other signifier like a flag pin or pronouns in the student database. and well so far she has had none of those. if anything her signaling is more detrans/transmasc butch like thats the assumption id make if im making assumptions. which i am. also another reason i thought she was definitely trans was that when we first met she seemed attracted to me potentially and... it seemed more plausible that shes ftm4ftm and thought thats what i am too because.... i guess it feels unlikely that a woman would see me out and about looking as strange as i do and be attracted to me in a woman4woman lesbian way. which is yeah my own issue........ and unrelated to my actual quandary here.

[ranhaitanisgf]

Hello Hana💖 Can i request Tenjiku Ran + dating app? lol. Something like:he gave it a try just bc rindou forced him to do it, he had no interest in dates/romance until he matches with y/n (y/n also felt the same way?) then they have a date and became good friends? and after a lot of time spent together & enjoying each other's company ,they realize they are in love? idk, do you magic lol change everything if you want. (i trust your talent and i love that man so much that i'll be happy anyway) Maybe it's an awful idea 🌚 but i'm not longer a teenager //.u. i go to college and i have no other way to delulu how can i met him if it's not through those 💩 apps hehe.

Thank you sweetie, have a wonderful day🥺💖

i guess i can try it out...?

synopsis: rindou signed ran up for a dating app...how is this date going to go?

☆ a/n ˎˊ˗ i i i... STRUGGLED WITH THIS .... this was such a cute req and idea omg but i have never used a dating app 😭 i do not know if i did this right but ! i hope you all still enjoy !! and thank you so much anon for requesting this !! xoxoxo

☆ characters ˎˊ˗ ran haitani x g/n!reader

☆ wc ˎˊ˗ 1.8k+

masterlist 

❥ ran has never really found much interest in dating apps; why would he be interested in meeting someone in a fake way? maybe it’s the little romantic in him, but he doesn’t want to try to actually meet someone he wants to spend time with in a way that feels ‘fake’ to him. he wants to be able to meet someone he likes in an organic way, though he himself isn’t quite sure where this notion comes from, (maybe the romance movies his mom used to watch?). 

“here.”  “what’s all this?”  “you should find someone, aniki.” “oho? where’s this coming from all of a-” “you’re home too much.” 

❥ ran is genuinely hurt by this. 

❥ begrudgingly, he creates a loose profile, not putting a whole lot of effort into it. he doesn’t really see the point in all of this, so his profile consists of a single blurry picture of him with his brother, (not specifying which one he is) and his bio merely states his name, age, and that he likes to sleep. 

❥ surprisingly, he gets matches despite having such a bland and blank profile, but he doesn’t even respond to any of the messages asking to meet up or asking for more information about him. he leaves them all on read, feeling wholly uninterested in talking to any of the people who were trying to get to know him. 

❥ and so, rindou decides to take the matter into his own hands. he’s able to get a hold of ran’s phone rather easily, (the man does not wake up, so he was still snoring away while rindou entered his room) and proceeded to fix up his profile to a more suitable one, even going so far as to respond to at least one of the people who he thought might be a good match for his brother. 

❥ one can probably imagine ran’s surprise when he wakes up in the morning and sees his formal wear set out on his dresser, and you could most definitely imagine his surprise when he sees a ‘okay, sounds good! see you then :)’ message from the dating app on his phone. 

❥ he strides into the kitchen, his phone in hand as he pointedly looks at rindou, who is sitting on the couch with a cup of coffee while watching something on tv. there were no words said between the two of them for a few moments, rindou merely looking up at ran with a look that said ‘you got a problem?’. 

“rindou.” “aniki.” “dear brother…what is this?”  “you have a date today at 7.”  “i don’t think so.” “you’re going.” “no, i’m not. end of discussion.”

❥ it was not the end of the discussion. 

❥ ran ended up agreeing, but it was only because rindou promised to pay for his hair appointments for the next six months, (it was a pretty good deal; the salon he goes to is very expensive). he wasn’t too thrilled about this since he thought of it as more of a waste of time, but he decided to put on his nice clothes anyway, spraying some of his good cologne on his wrists and neck. he even left his hair out of its usual plaits, testing out a few different hairstyles before deciding to just leave it down. 

❥ before he left, he’d taken a glance at the profile of the person he was supposed to meet. despite the fact that he was annoyed about this date rindou had set up, he has to admit that his brother does know his tastes pretty well, so he starts to feel just the tiniest bit of amusement and curiosity, (maybe he should get flowers? nah, he’ll just play it casual and see where it goes). 

❥ when ran arrived, he wasn’t surprised to see it was a typical restaurant/bar type of place, though he was a bit amused at the fact that it was located still in roppongi, (he thinks it would be funny if someone came up to him in the middle of the date because they recognized him). 

˗ˏˋ𖤐ˎˊ˗

“hey, are you ran?” 

“hm?” ran looked up from his place at the bar, seeing a somewhat familiar face looking back at him. he leans a bit closer, his eyes squinting to get a clearer picture…ah, the person he’s supposed to be meeting. 

cute. 

he stood up from his spot at the bar, pasting a charismatic smile on his face as he held his hand out. “correct. you must be (y/n), right?” 

“yes! it’s nice to meet you!” you beamed, giving your hand for a handshake. ran was a bit amused when he noticed your rather firm grip while shaking hands, but it only made him just a bit more curious about you. 

the two of you went to sit down at your table, ran politely pulling your chair out for you, (he had been debating on whether or not to play the gentleman card, but he decided to go with it). after he sat himself down, he decided to wait for you to speak first, wondering if you were going to pique his interest. 

a few moments of silence passed by as he watched your eyes flicking around the place, examining everything before coming back to him. when the two of you made eye contact, your lips ghosted a polite smile, your fingers moving to fidget with a piece of your hair. 

“just to be clear, i’m not really into this whole…dating app thing. i think it’s kind of stupid, but my friends told me to go on at least one date, so i’m here. i’m sorry, i just…” you paused for a moment, pursing your lips. “...i didn’t want to give you the wrong idea. i hope we can still have a good time though.” 

consider his interest piqued. 

“well, if we’re clearing things up, then i’ll admit that these sorts of things are not something i enjoy. my brother is the one who messaged you, and i’m here because he said he would pay for my hair appointments if i came.” ran was curious as to how you would react at his words; would you make a scene by yelling at him and then leave? would you just storm out? maybe you would even cuss him out! 

what he wasn’t expecting was for you to let out a big sigh, seemingly of relief, as you laughed a bit, your posture seeming more relaxed and open. 

“hah! that’s so funny actually!” you mused. “i guess we’re the perfect match then, huh?” 

“seems like it.” ran answered, an amused smirk on his face. “maybe the whole matching thing on dating apps do work after all.” 

“right? this seems like too much of a coincidence to be true!” after a moment, you suddenly seemed to get an idea, leaning forward a bit with a grin. “how about we just hang out for tonight as potential friends? none of that weird polite romantic bullshit that you see in first dates. just two people getting to know each other, completely platonically.” ran let out a laugh at your suggestion, his lips upturned in a casual smile. 

“sure, why not?” 

˗ˏˋ𖤐ˎˊ˗

❥ for the rest of the night, the two of you had a pleasant time chatting about various topics, talking about the latest fashion and hair trends to how you secretly think that pigeons are spying on the people of the world, (ran wholeheartedly believes in your theory; you made a very good argument). he hadn’t been expecting something like this, but when the night ended, he realized that he actually felt a bit sad at the fact that the two of you were going to be parting ways.

❥ this fact made him quite amused, and so, he suggested that the two of you hang out again. as friends, he says, explaining that he actually enjoyed your company and chatting with you, (he felt a little bit more than that, but he could save that for another time). 

❥ when he comes home and rindou asks how everything went, he just laughs and says ‘it was interesting’ then turns in for the night, leaving rindou wondering what the hell happened, and does interesting mean good or bad??

❥ the next time he sees you is by coincidence while he’s out grocery shopping for the week. he happens to run into you in the ice cream aisle, though you see him before he sees you; he’s quite focused on which flavor of ice cream to buy. 

“ran?”  “hm? oh, (y/n). funny seeing you here.” “yeah, no kidding! which flavor are you eyeing?”

❥ the two of you decide to have an impromptu hangout after that, both of you going to your respective apartments to drop off your groceries before meeting at a nearby cafe. it wasn’t anything crazy but there was a comfortable vibe, casual conversation and playful jokes being exchanged between the two of you as you sipped on your drinks. 

❥ ran hadn’t expected to have enjoyed talking with you so much, but before he knew it, the sky outside had changed from blue to orange, the sun setting in the distance. now that he had hung out with you for a second time, he knew that he was definitely interested in you, your joking and fun personality being something that he genuinely enjoyed, (he thought that you were also pretty cute, but that was another thing). 

“hey, let me take you home.”  “haha, i thought we said we were just going to be friends?”  “i can’t take my friends home to make sure they’re safe?”  “hmm…well, if you insist! who would’ve known you were such a gentleman~” 

❥ there wasn’t anything romantic about it, but there was a bit of a palpable tension between the two of you as he walked you home; the way your hands were just barely brushing against each other, the way you two were walking much closer to each other than friends would normally do, the stolen looks in the silent moments…ran knew you were feeling it too, but neither of you said anything. 

❥ there were no words spoke about it when the two of you arrived at your apartment, both of you just saying your goodbyes and leaving. ran is for the most part a patient man, so there’s a part of him that wants to keep quiet and see where everything goes. on the other hand, he wants to bring it up to you and maybe see where it takes the two of you. 

ranh_18: you looked good today. are you free on saturday? let me take you out for real this time.

❥ ran supposes he can be impatient every once in a while.

[adhdnojutsu]

I’ve always thought about this, in the manga, it says it’s been 11 years since Orochimaru left the Akastuki, because of the failed attempt to take Itachi, Itachi made Orochimaru leave. This was discussed when the Akastuki met up, Itachi was allegedly “21” at this time.

But Itachi said to have become the anbu captain at 13, it was mentioned by Kakashi im pretty sure when Itachi and Kisame came to capture Naruto.

Therefor Itachi was around late 13 or early 14 when the massacre was committed, he left Konoha after to join the Akastuki as a spy.

So 13/14 + the 11 years that was confirmed Itachi was in the organization for, that’s 24/25 years.

Is Itachi actually 24/25 years old and not 21 as “official sources” claim?

That would make him around 19/20 when he first came to “capture Naruto” and die around 24/25

I feel changing the “11 years” would be much more complicated than changing Itachis age, Sasuke was 6/7 around the time the clan died, so fast forward, he’s 17 when Itachi is “21”…how did Sasuke age around 11 years and Itachi only 7?

Idk if you already thought of this but it’s just a curiosity I’ve always had, correct me if I’m wrong at all

Glad you asked! Piecing timelines together is a thing I need for closure LOL so I already did it for the brothers!

I don't remember where, but it was said (not by an official source) that the "10 years since Orochimaru left Akatsuki" statement was a continuity error and should be disregarded. Because I could be wrong, but I vaguely remember that this statement was (also) made in the anime when Itachi was only 17/18 (after the chunin exams) and it would make absolutely 0 sense.

As for the massacre, the anime and manga make him 13 at the time. His official age of promotion was only mentioned that one time by Kakashi.

I don't know if you consider the Itachi Shinden novels canon, but personally I like to do so because they don't contradict any manga events, other than where Itachi's hands were when Shisui died... and add a lot of logical context. If we go by the novels, Kakashi only said Itachi was 13 because Hiruzen and Danzo aged him up on paper so as to not stir the pot too much by promoting someone at an age where others barely finish the academy. Itachi was actually 12 at the time of the massacre. It wouldn't be "wrong" for any character to say he was 13 as everyone was fed (and thoughtlessly believed??) the same lies about that poor kid. In his first detailed flashback in part 1 of the anime (on his way to the inn), Sasuke remembers how he was the same age Itachi was when he graduated, after auntie Uruchi (the chubby lady) said he was 7. That was the day of the massacre. It would also make the most sense. Canonically and in the anime, Itachi is 5 years older than Sasuke, and 7 + 5 = 12. In Itachi's first anime appearance, Sasuke just had his 13th birthday and Itachi should just have turned 18 the month before. This would make sense, too, as Sasuke is 16 when Itachi dies at 21 (Itachi's birthday is in June, Sasuke's in July).

Itachi's physical development isn't portrayed proportionately to his age or even true-to-data, which adds to the confusion. From the very beginning, Sasuke's flashbacks of 11-12-year-old Itachi show him much bigger than the Rookie 9. And he gets MUCH bigger within just 1 year. 11: 148 cm. 12 (officially 13 thanks to Danzo: 175 cm. LOL did Fugaku put something in his food to make him bigger faster because he also suddenly looks much more masculine??

But then, you put ANY adult in the room with him, and he suddenly shrinks. Danzo is officially shorter at 170 cm, but always shown taller, while Itachi wears thicker soles (Danzo wears slippers mostly).

Danzo has to bend to make eye contact with the squirt:

This is more than 6 cm difference! (175 & 181)

This was around the time of the massacre judging by Sasuke's size. Ummm... Wasn't Itachi officially as tall as Fugaku (175) here...

And this is just before the massacre, after Itachi got tired of trying:

He was supposed to be 6 cm taller than Kurenai (169 cm vs 175 cm), but he's drawn shorter than her!

And to make it all extra sad, I looked up what Itachi would look like in an accurate live action adaptation of the massacre, because Kishimoto draws him looking way older so the "groomed and exploited child soldier" part is more palatable:

(found on Pinterest)

For comparison, 12-year-old Itachi in the anime (average for Japanese boys that age is 153 cm, by the way, not 175 which is above average for ADULTS):

Naruto was said to be depicted as smol and scrawny on purpose, but while anime styles usually make a character look younger than their real life counterpart, Naruto was probably closest to that?

Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk!

[iiinkos]

made a tma avatar! the text is me rambling about their backstory n stuff, but since i had a headache, was making stuff up as i went along, and i was writing fast it is very incomprehensible

they’re mostly based on the crisis i had about if tma were real, would i want to become and avatar and live or just die to one of the entities

and also they’re a kid because i am way too into childhoods being ruined

i’ll write down their info under the cut! enjoy :)

name: harper tran

gender and sexuality: agender aroace

pronouns: they/them

status: avatar of the end

nationality: mixed filipino & vietnamese

age: 14

relations: oliver banks, gertrude robinson, jonathan sims

backstory:

harper grew up in a big family and the others never really paid attention to each other, so they often ended up wandering out when they were bored, eventually leading to their first encounter with a fear (the desolation)

they escaped but it kept happening— they went down a spiral (lmao) after recognizing the building used in a history lesson (robert smirke building that they had an encounter in)

eventually met gertrude who decided (after harper gave their statement) that they should know about the fears and whatnot

after that they dug deeper and found out about becoming an avatar & decided that they’d rather die than become one of those things, so they started being less and less careful about their self preservation, but that also led to the fears targeting them more

they managed to escape each time, but also getting closer and closer to dying each time, they came to gertrude for advice every now and then on how to deal with the entities

gertrude died and was replaced with jon though, and while jon didn’t have their answers he was fun to bully (and harper cared about him, but they wouldn’t admit it)

but eventually they died to a hunt avatar, who stabbed them in the chest

they chose to die, not thinking about the fact that the end could take them

they woke up disappointed but got up anyway to check out their wound, putting on a jacket to cover it up

while walking down the streets to the hospital they notice something weird about the people— some are injured heavily, some have their veins colored a toxic green, some they could see their organs, slowly dying, and none of them noticed

some’s injuries and whatnot were more obvious than others, they decided to check on someone whose weird thing was the most obvious (an old person with their heart)

the old person had a heart attack and died, and it made harper feel more energetic

they ran away and had a breakdown, tried to find a place where no one was dying (very, very hard) but met oliver instead, who showed them how to exist and be chill

they’re vibing now with oliver, just being immortal and kinda petty

notes:

i tried to base them off of martin’s line “you know, i think (the lonely) always had me” being that he was already showing signs of being a good fit for the lonely before he was actually turned. they were indifferent to the idea of death, which is why the end saw them as a good fit

i like writing them because they r just. so tired. gave them the energy of someone going thru a midlife crisis despite being a teenager lmao i might actually share a writing thing of them idk

they do NOT have a fashion sense. they put on a shirt and pants and that’s good enough

the ends of their hair are white because that’s my favorite oliver hc :)

alr thanks for reading my rambles!

[muffinpink02]

I was wondering if you could write a multi chapter fic of Lucy and Ona?

I was thinking one about when they met at the wedding and they flirt sm but do become really good just flirty friends. Everyone always teases them and asks if it is something more because Lucy is just a lot more affectionate with Ona than anyone else (a chapter could be dedicated to like little things Lucy does for Ona only) and eventually they talk about it and talk about the natural chemistry they have but instead of correctly communicating how they feel they find themselves in like a fwb situation

This goes on for ages with no one knowing what is happening, (you could do a chapter on them hiding to get away with each other or smut in public places and nearly getting caught by teammates.)

Eventually Ona gets jealous of Lucy and someone else (idk who- someone flirting shamelessly with her- loved the jealous Ona fic) and when Ona is trying to make Lucy remember that she is hers 😉😉 lucy accidentally blurts out smth like god this is why I love you and then as that happens someone in the team walks in on them asks what’s happening etc and they don’t know what to say and it complicates the whole situation.

Eventually I want them to end up together properly obviously.

This is quite a detailed request I’ve just been wanting a long fic of them being stupid friends in love with each other to fwb to lovers 😭

I would love to! But I’m already lacking in my other stories 😭 and this would be a big old task! I think there’s a lot of these stories on ao3!! One that I can think of the top of my head is

I can’t remember if it has everything you’re looking for in there, but it’s multi chapter and a very beautifully written! And of course cute Lucy and Ona.

Thank you for asking me though! And giving a very detailed story. I’m sorry I couldn’t say yes to this 🥺 Once I get some other big bits out of the way I could try in the future, if you haven’t found someone else to write it? Once I can take some request, I’ll be looking for you again, make sure you slide back in the request x

[nomsfaultau]

(Potentially) daily ask №2

Fault!Ranboo and Genloss!Ranboo edition due to the Founder's cut coming out today!

Fault!Ranboo

Okay does his thing kinda work like the shy man? So photos and videos count too? To the same degree?

Do they have any backstory lore? Before they were captured by the foundation?

Unstoppable force vs an immovable object question. Could anyone from the main gang defeat them? Like, how strong are they actually assuming someone looked them in the eye? Phil doesn't count he's a literal god.

If they and the main gang met, do you think they'd get along? What sort of relationships would they have with each member of the gang?

Would making a one-way mirror glasses for them work to basically disable their powers? Like they can see everything but the others can't see their eyes? Of course you could probably still get a glance from under the glasses considering their height but uh.. idk man, ski mask. But one-way mirror.

At this point you might as well count the universe in which I just spontaneously appear there an au because I can and will give you hypothetical scenarios of me interacting with the characters. On this note. BOOM *spontaneously revives them, convinces the whole ass foundation that they never existed so that they won't be searched for, revives that one doctor's wife, gives Ranboo a ski mask and teleports them to sbi* DONE WOO HI HOW ARE YA FEELIN'? (directed at them)

Gives them their favourite cookies for the emotional damage

Generation-loss!Ranboo

Do you know about genloss? Do you watch it? I know you said that you're not a fan of horror but tbh it's mostly psychological horror and some gore. Mostly silly though.

Are you gonna be watching Founder's cut today when it comes out in like 1.5 hours?

Any thoughts on it? Place to rant basically

The fault crew + Ranboo get teleported into the world of genloss suddenly. Specifically during choice while Ranboo and Charlie are running around the mall. How well does it go for either of them?

[Spoilers for Fault. like really stinking big ones]

Initially I thought not, but I think the real core of the powerset is being unbeholden. So he would go on a rampage if eye contact was made via camera/video. However, the ender pearl is a physical object that can't pass through walls when they teleport. So I suppose they'd just be determinedly trying to burrow through a wall, always knowing exactly where the person was but unable to reach.

Ranboo is alas a very very very minor character currently, like 'backstory to a tertiary supporting character' minor. Does not have backstory before the Foundation explored in or out of Fault...but will be showing up again eventually so more may be explored at that time. But as of yet, not really. Mostly because Ranboo's origins would have to be extreeeeemely far back in the timeline due to being (biig spoiler here) the source of the Foundation's amnestics. Philza has mentioned knowing of the Foundation for at least a few centuries, but also they do a very good job of being unknown. This gets into very foggy territory that's the bane of any urban fantasy's existence actually, because presumably if modern society is nearly identical to our own something has to have been suppressing anomalies from the dawn of time, in this case via Ranboo amnestics or some other means. So unless we assume time travel (which many SCP stories do, and which would be TERRIBLE for my story) I suppose Ranboo -or the phenomena of Ranboo, this could just be the latest vessel- could be very very old. I'd caution on the side of vessel, so potentially they began as a human ? or some other creature that then was changed by the god/entity using him? This entity then having had many many forms over time, frequently captured by use of the Foundation/analogous organization. Perhaps it was once extremely powerful, dampening the memories of humanity for its own reasons, leading to the current regime. oh. so i've just like solved a major world building problem. sick. Oh god I have racing thoughts about this now....

I think most could tbh. I mean Lawrence Lethe (ew) defeated them. In a physical fight Ranboo represents a horror monster threat to base humans, mostly by being tall fast strong and vicious plus some occasional teleportation, but has a very glaring weakness. Tubbo wouldn't for moral reasons but could also just fly way high up so Ranboo can't throw the enderpearl far enough. Tommy's Red might count close enough to water and dissolve them, though there is a debate on if Red would be able to thwart them from attacking him? That's a can of worms you could argue in any direction you want I think so I won't touch it. The Blade al.ways.wins. Like no matter what. Uh oh what's that the forecast looks like a storm how unfortunate anyway deadzo. Phil would turn that sucker to glass. And Wilbur loves eating sand. Though I suppose if he managed to eat their soul he could get Ranboo powers...? Anyway smack down that twink is OBLITERATED.

Ranboo will meet at least some of the main gang albeit as a skull and pile of sand. Tubbo is going to be. Well. in a REALLY funky head space due to encounters with Void madness. But they're going to be like???? our husband????????? not our husband? what plane of the universe are we on?? How do we know what is Real??? Existence is gonna fall apart-- while Ranboo is just like aw thanks for rescuing me random stranger this is great! ^-X Wilbur thinks Ranboo is very inconvenient to move around but at least they don't eat much? Ranboo doesn't like being around it because the void keeps nibbling. Philza would have STRONG feelings about Ranboo due to his horrific experience with amnestics. But also would acknowledge that Ranboo hadn't much say in the matter, and ultimately treat them politely yet indifferently as he does most people he doesn't view as important (anyone that isn't his Collected or a problem). The Blade is very stiff and unhappy as he isn't as good separating them from all of his friends forgetting about him. Bit more of a problem than Phil since The Blade usually handles his problems extremely directly via murder, but he has enough character development at this point to see killing Ranboo won't help. After some friction he gets over it and after some awkwardness is probably down to joke around and be his normal dorky self with Ranboo. Tommy would have resentment about what happened to Phil since he's very loyal, but then Ranboo would make him laugh and he'd forget about it lol. Also 2x scared of touching them.

It's based on Ranboo feeling like they're being perceived to an extent? So I think if Ranboo thought they were being watched they'd also go on a rampage. I think the Foundation just blinded them with a blindfold. Or morbidly, perhaps would rip out their eye and wait for it to regrow, to create a stash of ender pearls for Foundation personnel use...?

Lawrence would be reeling, and then probably assume having the wifey back means his redemption arc is finished. This would cause Many problems later on. Speaking of problems, the Foundation would be PANICKING. Oh my god. I think if convinced Ranboo never existed there'd be utter chaos of them trying to figure out what cognito hazard is messing with them. So while the Foundation is set on fire and the entire premise of the series collapses, let's ignore that and see how the gang is doing! I'm going to say they're dropped at the end of the most recent chapter. Assuming they don't startle and attack in self defense, Tommy is utterly delighted to get even more friends because he's so starved for people, Tubbo is trying to figure out if the wife revival thing would work for themselves/Rhodes (potentially while simultaneously flirting with Ranboo for maximum comedic value)((but also probably Rosalind since that's destroying them)), The Blade is trying to figure out if the teleportation act could be used to break out of the Foundation in the future, Wilbur is disgruntled by strangers (one of which is HUMAN), and Phil is mostly trying to figure out if there's a security risk if they could be found...but is probably quickly assured it's fine given he got Tommy via accidental summoning shenanigans. Since I don't think the ski mask thing would work, Ranboo would probably be blindfolded. I think Tubbo would act as seeing eye bees for them, developing little short hand codes to help them move around and really bonding over that. Phil is the type of guy to do blind fold training and have tips. The Blade commiserates with them over the time he lost an eye, and Wilbur with being blinded by the Foundation via light. And potentially the reactions from 4 (-Tubbo bc of timeline, Wilbur bc revived fully) if more well adjusted since the gang is doing better here than in epoch 3-4.

Wilbur insists he eats the cookies first (to make sure they aren't poisoned of course of course). He tells everyone they're disgusting and tries to eat them all but Phil puts a stop to that. Tommy declares that he is perfectly emotionally fine and is only stealing the cookies because he deserves a reward. The Blade argues he should get way extra because of his size. While everyone is bickering Tubbo yoinks them and flies away, only to get chased down by Philza, who distributes them, and reminds everyone else to thank you. Instant Phil points for making his Collected happy.

Genloss

Not really haha. Haven't seen anything of it. I know zilch, except i think a surgery happens and niki is on a carousal whatever that means? Full transparency, I mostly just watched Techno and then Tommy stuff for more Techno content.

4. As I know nothing of genloss, I can't do much here. HOWEVER. There is a pivotal scene in Fault that will take place in a mall. So we can imagine Ranboo and Charlie frolicking in the background amongst piles and piles of Foundation MTF soldier corpses while the main characters have a terse argument about philosophies, morals, and custody?

[adrunkskeletonsduck]

Can I request Naruto boys or only Itachi (your wish) reacting hearing yn speaking in English?!? Like she can speak well and her accent was pretty much good.

Lᴀɴɢᴜᴀɢᴇ Lᴇssᴏɴs

➜ Pairing: Itachi Uchiha x reader

➜ Synopsis: The busy town was engulfed with bustling people, shop owners, children, and parents trying to chase after said children and in the midst of the organized chaos, you and Itachi, on your way back to the Akatsuki base after a tiresome couple of days. When you stop for a quick lunch before you return you get more excitement than you had bargained for

➜ Warning: fluff, children, not properly proofread

➜ Word Count: 1.4k

➜ Notes: As someone who is bilingual, I understand the struggle, esp when it comes to having pronunciation issues 🥲 idk what this is I rlly hope you like it tho

Nᴀʀᴜᴛᴏ Mᴀsᴛᴇʀʟɪsᴛ

The town you and Itachi chose to stop in for lunch was small. It was surrounded by forest on all but one side where it connected to the main road, It had a tall mountain range behind it and many natural hot springs. The scenery around it was beautiful and the town itself was lively and bright. Many of the buildings you passed seemed to be hotels, so you guessed that this was a place people came to relax and vacation.  

So, despite its small size it was still quite busy, making it easy for you and Itachi to stay unnoticed as the two of you weaved your way through the crowd, trying to find a good place to grab a quick meal and be on your way. It wasn’t that you were in a hurry to get back to the Akastsuki base, you were certainly not looking forward to facing the heaping stack of paperwork that had accumulated over the week because of your procrastination, however, you were looking forward to sleeping in your own bed. 

“How about that one?” you asked, pointing to your right at a sushi place. It looked to be fairly empty, and you guessed that was because it had just opened not too long ago, considering the paper posted on the side stating the hours.  

Itachi turned following your gaze, and humming in agreement after a second. The two of you found an empty table by the far corner of the open restaurant to sit down at, neither of you looking to hard at the menu before ordering.  

Slowly, the restaurant began to fill up, people pouring in in groups and the place becoming loud with chatter. You didn’t try to make conversation with Itachi, knowing that your attempts would not be reciprocated and instead be met with silence. It didn’t bother you as much as it used to when you had first started working with him, you had quickly learned that he was a man of very few words. You often found yourselves sharing a comfortable silence when you were together. There wasn’t much to talk about anyway.  

It didn’t take to long for your food to be prepared, and the two of you ate in silence, digging in the second the server had turned his back and whispering a small praise to the chef. Once you were done you paid and got up to leave. However, you didn’t get too far out of the restaurant before a light tug on the bottom of your cloak stopped you. Looking down you saw a small child looking back up at you, teary eyed and a desperate look painting her face.  

You frowned unsure of what to do and glanced back up at Itachi who was stopped a few feet away from you, his usual stone-cold expression gone now and his own unsure frown replacing it. You weren't sure whether to ignore the girl, or stop for her. You weren’t in a particular hurry though, you thought. Another tug on your cloak and the sound of a small sniff brought you back to reality, and you looked back to the little girl by your feet. 

Crouching down so that you were eye level with her you spoke to her gentley, “What's wrong?” Your statement didn’t help, instead a fresh wave of tears spilled down her cheeks and she let out a cry.

Her reaction deepened the frown on your face and made you even more confused. It wasn’t that you didn’t like kids or that you were particularly bad with them, you just didn’t interact much with them given the type of ‘career’ you had.  

You looked up, glancing around and looking for anyone who may have been willing to help you, only to be met dirty looks being sent your way. You tried again, asking her something different, “What's your name?” Again, your question did nothing to calm her, only making her cry harder and tug on your cloak.

You sighed looking up at Itachi, who had moved closer to your side now, and sending him a pleading look for help. He only shrugged his shoulders wordlessly, wearing that same emotionless expression again as he watched you struggle to help the little girl. 

You looked back at the girl, biting your lip in frustration and looking at her to try and get an idea of what to do. The words on her shirt caught your attention. English. Her shirt was written in English. Maybe she didn’t speak Japanese, that must have been why she was so distressed earlier when you spoke to her, because she couldn’t understand you.  

“What's your name?” you asked again, this time in English. You reached up and stroked her hair in attempt to calm her down enough so she could answer...if she had understood you that was. Itachi raised his eyebrows in surprise from next to you, you had never mentioned that you could speak English, and so well no less.

Thankfully she had, her tears slowed, and she sniffed before answering, “N-neda.”  

“What's wrong Neda? Where are your parents?” you asked, relieved that she could now understand you.  

“I-I don’t know, I lost them,” she sniffed again, tears beginning to well in her eyes once more.  

“Hey, don’t cry, we’re going to find your parents, okay?” You began stroking her hair again with one hand, using the other to wipe away the few tears that had escaped her eyes. Neda nodded. “Now, where was the last place you were with them?”  

She turned and pointed to a stand that sold traditional Japanese clothes and home decorations among other things. It looked to be a tourist shop and much to your relief you saw a couple standing in front of the shop, looking hysterical as they looked around and pulled over passer byers, speaking to them in a panic. You couldn’t hear what they were saying but you had a pretty good guess.  

Standing up, you took Neda’s hand in yours, as to make sure she wouldn’t get lost from you, and walked over to the stand where the couple was standing. You weren't sure if the parents would speak Japanese, considering their daughter didn’t, so you played it safe and spoke to them in English.  

“Excuse me?” you said, getting the couples attention, “Is this your daughter?” you gestured to Neda, who was already running to her mother to wrap her small arms around her mother's leg in a make shift hug. 

“Oh my!” the lady shrieked dropping to her knees and pulling her daughter into a hug, which Neda happily returned. “We were so worried about your sweety! Don’t you ever run off like that again, you understand me!” her mother said scolding her, already beginning to too lecture Neda on the importance of staying close by them. You looked back up from the scene, your eyes glittering in amusement. Her father shook his head and sighed from above them, obviously very relieved that his daughter was back with them. 

“Thank you so much, we were so worried,” he said with a small chuckle.  

“It's no problem,” you assured with a smile, “I really need to get going though, enjoy your stay!” The couple called another ‘thank you’ and you turned, heading back to Itachi who was still standing in the same place, watching the whole ordeal unfold. The both of you fell into an easy pace as you got back to him, walking side by side as you left the village.  

“I didn’t know you could speak English,” Itachi broke the silence. 

“Yeah...I’m pretty out of practice since I haven't spoken in a while,” you explained sheepishly.  

“You speak well, better than anyone I've met actually.” You looked up at him, a small smile spreading over your face. It was rare to hear itachi compliment someone, so it was all the more special when he did.  

“Really?” he nodded, “no one's ever told me that...I always thought I didn’t speak well and couldn’t pronounce the words properly,”  

“Thats not the case at all,” he assured. Your smile widened into a grin and you looked back to the road feeling a new found confidence in your second language wash over you. 

“Can you speak English?” you asked him 

“Enough to get me by if I would need,” he replied looking at you, “maybe you could teach me sometime though.” His words pulled a small laugh from you, and you smiled 

“I’ll hold you to your word.”  

[uyuforu]

Hiii.

How are you doing? I hope things are good. I would like to participate in your game. Here are my charts:

For exchange:

These are some things that I feel like could be true about your FS.

💭Your fs  is very intelligent,wise right off the bat.

ASC at 21° + MC at 9° in Juno PC . He could appear very knowledgeable in his professional life. Someone who knows what is to be done.

He could even be powerful because of his knowledge/wisdom(Sag Pluto 9°).

💭And because Uranus aspects   10H Pluto , it will give him unique ideas or ways of executing his knowledge. The type to not just be a bookworm. And because he has this unique way of doing things , he can be less intimidating to others although he seems to have that strong aura in his professional field.

💭Moon is in trine and Venus is sextile with Pluto...damn he must be popular amongst females. He probably attracts lots of sapiosexual people .Women love his nerdy brain.

Appearance wise , he's very attractive. He is secretive , mysterious in his ways . Very calm and composed. Mature and organized. But boy when he is pissed,he's PISSED.

He has this intensity about him that is very calm like the type of beauty that slowly, very slowly makes you drunk.

He could be obsessive...stalking even.

💭Your fs has great sex appeal too. He is just sexy even if he's just existing. He is a passionate man. And when he loves you, he will SHOW it.Grand gestures .

Food could be a way. Like taking you to fancy restaurants or ordering your favourite food.(Scorpio Groom 1°square Leo Venus )

Oh my goddd...He probably feels like he's not a good enough boyfriend or his way of expressing love is not very nice. He loves you deeply but his weird/unique  way of expressing it makes him feel not good enough internally. Externally he might seem okay or even confident.

He is sexually very attractive as well. He seems confident and that's just simply HOT. Also he probably daydreams about the sexy stuff.(Mars 24° sex. Moon Juno PC)

💭Your fs could have some wounds from past friendships. But he probably learnt some life lessons through them. I think his education process was traumatizing to some extent.

He could have been struggling due to his studies but he was strong and bounced back 10× stronger.  Although it was painful, it made him see clearer and could've have found his 'purpose ' in the process.

Emotional intensity. Hot and cold behaviour at times because of his past experiences,he could feel sad.

Good imagination power.

He could be into women who are textbook beautiful..Libra ppl...but he also likes some uniqueness about you...like yea you're really pretty but what's the weird thing of yours that  makes you beautiful in my eyes...that energy. He loves/adores eccentric ppl..who are different and refreshing. People who are owning their shit.

💭Your fs could have some major placements in Aquarius /Sagittarius/Aries..His Mars could be dominant. Saturn as well.Taurus or maybe an earth sign Saturn?

Your fs might have beautiful eyes..the ones that scream royalty..like back the fuck off.

But if he's in love with someone, his eyes will be lit with passion and I can see a devilish smirk on his face in my head😭

(Literally he's  something else when turned on..its like a whole new world)

💭He's someone who will age well. His 'beauty' blooms better with age.

💭He's spontaneous,weird but full of love and knowledge. Feels frustrated when he can't express shit. Very reserved and quite generally but likes talking when he's comfortable with someone. 

Union is in Libra in both charts.  Maybe you met in a very balanced setting..well organized bc of that virgo degree. Venus at 11° tho..online meeting at some point. It could've felt like a dream meeting your fs.

In both PCs, Groom is conjunct Vertex..he was meant to be a groom/husband.

Idk how accurate I was but yeah. (This is my first time reading for someone so 🤡)

Thank you so much for reading till the end. And I appreciate your work here on tumblr.💗

GAME IS CLOSED. Thank you for participating to the game. Here is your reading. Also thank you for the reading. It was super detailed so I must thank you a lot for that, and I think it's a terrific analysis!! Really enjoyed it :)

જ⁀➴ Could meet FS in church, or in a religious setting, while traveling, or in college, or while studying. You could meet them unexpectedly, or just out of nowhere, in your everyday life. You could also meet them online, and have a crush on them, or they have a crush on you. Or you will text, call a lot.

જ⁀➴ FS can be a foreigner, but they can also be someone who is quite athletic about their look.

જ⁀➴ They can work out a lot, and be considered "hot" or "sexy"

જ⁀➴ FS can be very worried or anxious about their money, but at the same time they can have hard times not spending money lol. Love to shopping, and can actually spend a lot in a little time.

જ⁀➴ FS is smart, and FS and you could study the same thing.

જ⁀➴ FS can be more logical than creative, and have hard time to let their imagination flow

જ⁀➴ FS can also either not want children or have no plans with children for their future.

જ⁀➴ FS does wanna get married, and will probably know they will marry you when they meet you.

જ⁀➴ FS is hard working and has a lot of ambition. Can succeed in their career eventually.

જ⁀➴ FS is super popular among friends, can have a lot of friends. People may find your FS to be very nice and cool, get along with anyone.

જ⁀➴ FS can also have friends around the world

જ⁀➴ FS can also use social medias a lot and have a good amount of followers

જ⁀➴ FS can be popular among women

જ⁀➴ FS can also be quite lucky in general

જ⁀➴ FS can be more secretive than they show.

Potential placements of FS:

𝜗𝜚 Aries/ 1H

𝜗𝜚 Leo/ 5H

𝜗𝜚 Gemini/ 3H

𝜗𝜚 Libra/ 7H

𝜗𝜚 Pisces/ 12H

𝜗𝜚 Taurus/ 2H

𝜗𝜚 Possible Earth Moon

𝜗𝜚 Possible Fire Rising

If you enjoyed the reading you can post a review about it or tell me what you think. Have a nice day!

Thank you for reading!

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