#if you're not sure you can email in time just ask me for a link!

[vivwritesfics]

Fire Is The Devil's Only Friend

Chapter Two

There was no such thing as making it on your own with a high profile boyfriend. That was why she kept her relationship a secret. But then after a PR fuck up, her boyfriend is forced into PR relationship and she's left on the side lines, missing him

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"Have you saved your work yet?"

Carlos knew better than anyone how hard she was working. Between writing her next book, using social media to market, and answering emails from her editor, she as flat out. He was incredibly worried about her.

She looked up at him for just a second before saving her work. The moment she did, Carlos pushed the lid of her laptop closed. "Carlos!" She cried. She went to open the laptop again, but Carlos pulled it from the table.

"One hour, mi amor. Give me on hour, and then I've give you your laptop back."

She thought on it. "You promise just an hour?"

"I promise," he said as he stepped towards her, the laptop against his chest. "We can go and get coffee together." He leaned down and pecked her lips.

She pouted as he pulled away. "You're too good to me."

"Because I just love you so much," he said and kissed her again.

***

The story of Carlos Sainz's relationship with Rebecca Donaldson broke in the early hours of the next morning. Neither of them were aware.

Carlos didn't check his phone when he woke up. He went on a run in the early hours of the morning and spent a few hours working out, like he did every day, all while she slept.

When he got back, she was still sleeping. Carlos made two coffees and brought them to the bedroom. Placing them down onto their bedside tables, Carlos leaned over and kissed his head. "Wake up, mi corazón," he said softly.

She stirred awake and glared at her husband. "It's so early," she groaned, pressing her face further into the pillow.

His laugh echoed around their bedroom. "It's not that early, my love. I got you coffee, drink up."

They had just a few hours together before she was having an online meeting with her publishers in her office and Carlos was meeting with the team at Ferrari.

He opened his laptop and logged into the call. He was rarely in a bad mood these days, the team at Ferrari noted. It was a surprise to all of them, especially after the story they had sold to the media that morning. "Carlos, I'm sure you've heard the news."

The smile dropped from Carlos's face, replaced by a frown. "What news?" He asked. He hadn't yet been on any social media, had seen none of the news articles flash up on his phone.

"We made a decision here at Maranello, one we felt would benefit the entire team," somebody else said. "After some recent events, all of which were out of our control, we thought it best to give the media something more digestible. To do so, it was leaked to the press that you were potentially romantically linked to Rebecca Donaldson, the Scottish Model."

All expression dropped from Carlos's face. He turned on his phone and, for the first time, saw the news. The news about him.

The photo of himself with Rebecca Donaldson wasn't obviously photoshopped, but there was no other explanation. There he was, in a picture with a woman he had never met.

"See, the things is, Carlos, what else are we supposed to do? Do you want Ferrari to crumble?"

No, obviously he didn't want that. "But what about the relationships of mine this does affect?" He asked quickly, pulling open his desk drawer and pulling out the ring box. He didn't display it on camera, fiddled with it in his lap. "What if I was in a relationship and I hadn't yet told anyone?"

"You don't want to lose your seat, do you?" It was a dirty ploy, but the Ferrari team was desperate. "You're almost thirty, you have a limited number of wins under your belt and no championships. Will any other team want you?"

Carlos's heart pounded in his chest. "So, I have to go on with this fake relationship and I'll get to keep my seat?"

"Exactly."

He sucked in a deep breath. Just a wall separated him from the love of his life, but here he was, ready to betray her. All for his seat. "What will I have to do?"

The rest of the meeting was spent with the Ferrari team telling Carlos exactly what they wanted from him. Be seen with her at races, have her in the Ferrari garage, take her to dinner sometimes. It was easy enough.

But it wasn't. Because the woman he loved was going to be at the races too, just not with him, not in the way they wanted Rebecca to be with him.

It was too late for him to back out. The press had released several stories about Carlos and Rebecca already.

The call ended, but he just stayed there, sitting in his chair. He flipped open the ring box several times, playing with it in his hands. The ring was gorgeous, simple, elegant. But now, Carlos doubted he'd ever get to put it on her finger.

At the knock on his office door, Carlos shoved the ring back into his desk drawer. "Carlos?" She called as she entered his office. He looked to the door as she walked in. Her shoes clicked softly against the tiled floor as she walked to his desk and sat herself on his lap. "I've got news about the release. It's launching next week."

"I'll be the first to buy it," he said, his hands on her hips.

Just hours ago, this would have been welcome news. The release of her book meant they were one step closer with telling the world about their relationship. But all of that had been thrown out of the window now, and she had no idea.

"I can't wait to kiss you after a race," she said, her head against his shoulder. "I can't wait to be seen with you."

Carlos said nothing. He kissed her head and held her close, relishing in these moments they had together. There was no telling how many more there would be once she found out.

Maybe he could propose to her now. Drop down onto one knee, put the ring onto her finger and kiss her until she forgot how to breathe. But then it would hurt so much more when she found out.

And he couldn't do that to her.

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[phoenixyfriend]

How to Call Your Reps About Gaza

I make a lot of posts telling you to call your reps! Anyway, here's the overall shape of how to argue to them.

Disclaimer: I am not in politics. I do not have experience as a staffer. I am just someone who cares a lot about where things are going, and wants to help. Also, this is specific to the US, because that's where I'm based. Hopefully, people with expertise can add more suggestions on.

Find your elected officials.

My Ko-fi: this took me two days to write up, so uh. If you've got a few dollars, send them my way so I can keep doing this sort of thing, and maybe move out of my parents' house sooner.

General tips:

Be polite, or at least civil. Do not swear or shout at whoever answers the phone. This will quite possibly get your number blocked. Fifty civil calls over the course of several months will do more than one where you shout. You can be frosty, you can say you are disappointed, you can say you find the actions of your reps to be reprehensible or morally bankrupt, sure. But keep calm and aim criticism at the rep, not the staffer.

Keep it short. The staffers who answer call centers are busy. They usually start trying to hurry me off after about two minutes. I've yet to manage a call longer than four or five minutes. Pick one or two topics for the day, and focus on those. Cycle through them every time you call. Stick to just one from day to day if it's a large, ongoing issue like Gaza.

Plan for voicemail. I get voicemail more often than not. My House rep usually has a staffer free, but the Senators are almost always voicemail. This will give you a minute and a half max. Be ready to get your point squeezed into that.

Only call your representatives. The important, powerful word here is "constituent." You will be ignored or even counted against if you are from a different district or state. The first thing you start with is your name and address. A staffer will ask for the information they need. On voicemail, leave your full name, your city and state, and zip code before you go into your message. Do not lie, either. They look these things up in the system when you call. I'm not sure how--I think maybe they have access to a database of registered voters--but every time I call, they ask for my last name and address and at some point say, 'oh, yep, I've got you right here,' which indicates a database of some sort.

Research at least a little bit about their opinions. If they already agree with you, then it's much easier to leave a quick "I support you and want you to know that" to combat anyone who's arguing from the other side. If they don't, then you're best off finding out what specific issue they have so you can know the best kind of comment to leave.

Look up specific bills or arguments. I get daily emails from GovTrack about bills that are on this week's docket or have been voted on in the past day. IDK about anyone else, but being able to say that I disagree specifically with HR 815 or something makes me feel powerful, and possibly like I will be taken more seriously. Sometimes you can start with articles like this one, which include links to specific bills on the official congress website.

Email after if you can. Reportedly less effective, and takes longer, but you are more likely to get a written (canned) response, and it reinforces whatever you called about.

Basic structure of a call, at least as I've been doing it:

"Hi, my name is ____ ____, and I am a constituent from [city, state], [zip]. I am calling to express my opinion on [topic]. I am concerned about [short argument with a clear impact on the topic]. I ask that you support [measure or fellow congress member]/vote [yay/nay on specific legislature]. Thank you for your time, and I hope you keep my opinion in mind."

For this post, the topic can be stated as the war in Gaza, military funding for Israel, or unrest in the Middle East, depending on which you think your elected official will respond to best. That said, the structure should work for whatever your call is about.

Arguments to use against your elected official... or your on-the-fence cousin:

I'll be honest, some of these are not going to do much against your representative. They know the arguments, and have been going over them with each other for months. You just need to have one locked and loaded that they consider relevant instead of a nonstarter, in order to back up your opinion as 'founded' instead of 'nonsense, can be swayed with a good marketing campaign.'

I'll include explanations if I don't think something is self-evident (or needs more evidence to tell your cousin), but in most of them I'll provide some suggested verbiage that you can tweak as needed, and for a few of them, that's really enough.

THESE ARE FOR THE TOPIC OF CONCERN, ONLY. You still need to end each one with "I ask that the [official] votes to [action]" at the end. Give them something actionable (example from Feb. 13th). My go-tos right now:

Both chambers: Reinstate funding for UNRWA

Both chambers: Place mandatory restrictions on any aid to Israel, with contractual threats to cut funding if Netanyahu and his government continue to disregard civilian life

Senate: Put support behind Bernie Sanders and his motion to restrict funding to Israel until a humanitarian review of the IDF’s actions in Gaza has been completed (S.R. 504) (Tabled by the Senate on 1/16, but it is being brought back in as conditions continue to escalate)

House: Put support behind Rep. Rashida Tlaib’s petition for the US government to recognize the IDF’s actions in Gaza as ethnic cleansing and forced displacement, and put a stop to it.

House: Put support behind H.R. 786, introduced by Rep. Cori Bush, calling for an immediate deescalation and cease-fire in Israel and occupied Palestine.

What Not to Say

"There is no threat to Israel." I've talked about this elsewhere, but the short version is that this will be basically laughed out as you not knowing what you're talking about.

Anything generically antisemitic. (I mean, it might work on some of the white supremacists, but do you really want to encourage that thinking? No, so don't do it.)

Facts that you "heard somewhere" but cannot find a reliable source for. If it's being reported by the New York Times, NPR, or the BBC, it's probably trustworthy by government standards. If it's not a super common statistic, cite the journal you got it from by name. Remember, you aren't arguing to tumblr mutuals. You are arguing to your elected official or your 'I don't really pay attention' cousin. When it comes to this, big name news sources are better.

Unrealistic demands for complete isolationism, permanently abandoning Israel to its own devices, supporting Hamas, etc. Again, you will not be taken seriously. Pick an argument they might actually listen to, and use it to press them towards a possible solution. You want them to believe that if they adjust their position, they will be doing the will of most of their constituents, and thus more likely to get reelected.

The Ethics Argument

Third-party reporting has stated that that nearly 29,000 Gazans are dead since Oct. 7th, as of 2/18/24. The vast majority of those are civilians, and over half are children. Palestinians in Gaza are facing an acute hunger crisis threatening to become a full-blown famine.

The International Court of Justice has found that there is credible reason to believe that the state of Israel is committing a genocide against the Palestinians of Gaza.

This does not mean that every single Israeli is complicit. It does mean that the government, particularly Netanyahu and his associates, has been reprimanded by a large, diverse coalition of countries, and has consistently refused to listen to that court since.

This argument will possibly work on your cousin. Less likely to work on your elected official. They already know the numbers. I just wanted to get it out of the way first.

The Re-Election Argument: Michigan vs New York

Meanwhile, this is possibly the most effective. Again, this is not an argument of ethics. This is an argument of "how can I make my elected official do what I want." We do not use only the purest moral argument. We use what works.

What to say to your elected official: Michigan, as a swing state, was won by democrats on the power of the Arab-American vote in the 2020 election. We (either party) are at risk of losing Michigan due to the current Congressional approach to the Gaza conflict, as that demographic is now polling as likely to abstain from voting entirely. The risk of losing several congressional districts due to the Jewish vote is a real one, but the risk of losing the the executive branch is greater, especially after what we saw with Suozzi. Supporting Palestine might lose us parts of New York, but supporting Israel will lose us Michigan.

Explanation: Something that has been taking up a lot of time and space in the election coverage is the situation in Michigan, and more recently, there has been attention paid to the special election of New York's third district, AKA the "who gets to replace disgraced George Santos" competition.

Michigan is traditionally a swing state. While 2.1% doesn't sound like a lot, that is some 211k-278k people (depending on your source), and while not all of them can vote... Michigan was won by about 154k. Arab-Americans are not the only relevant demographic, but they sure are an important one, and they are vocally opposed to the situation. Approval has dropped from 59% to 17%. From that same article:

As Axios notes, Biden won Michigan in 2020 by 154,000 votes, but there are at least 278,000 Arab Americans in Michigan. Biden took Arizona, a state with an Arab American population of 60,000, by only 10,500 votes. In Georgia, Biden prevailed with a margin of 11,800 voters, in a state that has an Arab American population of 57,000.

Democrats cannot afford to lose these states. Pressure your congresspeople about that, especially if you live in one of those states. I assume most Arab-Americans in said states are already calling every day; the rest of you can join in.

Meanwhile, most Jews (considered the most pro-Israel demographic by strategists) in America are concentrated in a very small number of electoral districts. Of the twenty most-Jewish, ten are in New York, which is why I put it up in the section header.

One of those districts was won by a Republican in 2022: George Santos, New York's third congressional district. Following his scandals and ousting, the seat was up for a special election, and the two candidates were Tom Suozzi, a democrat who held the seat previously (he decided to run for governor, and lost), and Mazi Pilip, a Nassau county legislator who was of Ethiopian Jewish background and had been in the IDF. She ran on a campaign that leaned strongly pro-Israel and anti-immigration, and when Suozzi won, she interrupted his victory speech to accuse him of supporting a genocide against Israel due to his rather centrist, rather milquetoast stance on the conflict during his election campaign.

Now, Suozzi's win probably had more to do with Pilip being anti-choice than her pro-Israel arguments, but he still won.

Democrats can better risk possibly losing a few seats in NY than definitely losing three swing states.

"But I don't want Dems to win their districts after what they've been--" Nope. Listen to me. Surveys indicate that Republicans are on average more pro-Israel, because Trump and Netanyahu are buddy-buddy, and we do not have a viable third option.

Also, again, this is about convincing Dems to be better. "If you do not vote to put restrictions on funding to Israel, I will not vote for you in November" is a lot more powerful than "I will not vote for you either way, because of what you've been doing, but you should do what I say anyway."

The Re-Election Argument: Risk of Escalation

So, that thing I said about Trump and Netanyahu?

Yeah, so, while Biden is giving Israel military aid while cautioning them to slow down and be careful, Trump is... complicated, but suffice to say he's much closer to Netanyahu on a personal level than Biden is. Biden's relation with Netanyahu is reportedly pretty frosty, while Trump's is based on relations through the Kushners.

Just from wikipedia:

Netanyahu made his closeness to Donald Trump, a personal friend since the 1980s, central to his political appeal in Israel from 2016.[21] During Trump's presidency, the United States recognized Jerusalem as the capital of Israel, recognized Israeli sovereignty over the Golan Heights, and brokered the Abraham Accords, a series of normalization agreements between Israel and various Arab states.

Trump's been more all-over-the-place recently, badmouthing Netanyahu for being what Trump perceives as a loser, which complicates understanding what his approach is. It's kind of incoherent right now.

Given Trump's general history of being pro-Israel, though, and the attempts by House Republicans to push through a bill of unconditional funding for Israel. It failed, but notable is that the more recent bill passed in part because it was paired with aid for Ukraine and Taiwan (something Dems are much more invested in having happen).

What to say to your elected official: If Trump is reelected due to his current appearance of being more critical of Netanyahu, there is evidence from his presidency to indicate that he will support Israel much less critically if elected. While he claims to want to settle the Middle East, it seems incredibly likely that he will worsen the situation for Palestinians, and ramp up retaliatory strikes to groups like the Houthis in a manner that will impact non-military parties, igniting tensions that are already tenuous.

The Disrespect/Wild Card Argument

This particular argument is best used against the Very Patriotic Politicians who are more concerned with the US's image and Being The Alpha Nation than with other things. Basically, this might work on Republicans.

This isn't really something I believe in, as a matter of foreign policy, buuuut it might work on your rep, so. Consider it!

What to say to your elected official: With Israel's recent actions in ignoring Biden, blocking US-sent aid like those flour trucks that got stopped at the Rafah border because they'd be distributed by UNWA, and generally Disrespecting The USA and Being Unpredictable is not only making the US look bad for being unable to wrangle a smaller country, but also making it so we are less able to wrangle other countries in the future, because Israel cannot be predicted and might set someone off.

The Europe and Reputation Argument

What to say to your elected official: The United States is losing credibility as a world power known for its military and ability to manage international disputes on behalf of the UN, because it is seemingly unable to influence Israel, and losing credibility as an upstanding moral state that is not doing foreign coups and banana republics anymore, as it appears to be tacitly supporting Israel's ICJ-labelled genocide, which is a really bad look with the other Western Powers.

I'm not entirely sure who this might work on, but there's gotta be at least a few politicians who are really concerned about America's image, more than about actually doing the right thing. Figure out if your politician is one of them.

If necessary, you can bring up how Trump is threatening to pull US support for NATO if Russia attacks someone.

The Middle East Stability Argument: Iran-backed Militias

What to say to your elected official: I'm concerned that the continued support of Israel, and thus the funding of their actions in Gaza, will increase the instability of Iran-backed militias, as we have already seen with the Houthis and Hezbollah. Entire Muslim-majority nations are showing increased displeasure not only with Israel, but with the US by extension. We cannot afford another war in the Middle East when we haven't yet pulled all our troops from the last one, not with the recent and recurring economic recessions. Any situation would also very likely be complicated or inflamed by the growing tensions among Eritrea, Djibouti, and Ethiopia regarding Red Sea access as well.

Use this on the ones that claim to be pro-military or pro-veteran. See what they said about HR 815 before the foreign military funding amendment was added.

The Middle East Stability Argument: Egypt

What to say to your elected official: Egypt's government has been unstable since the Arab Spring, and even now the military government is incredibly unpopular. With that existing instability, the addition of economic strain from the reduced usage of the Suez canal, the international disputes occurring because they're the main throughway for aid into Gaza, and the threat of a sudden influx of nearly one and a half million Palestinian refugees should Israel continue to push south... Egypt is looking at a possible near-collapse as we've seen in nearby nations suffering similar instabilities.

Explanation: It took several years for Egypt to really start recovering from the revolts in 2013, and it has applied for four IMF loans in recent years. The current government is unpopular to such a degree that they are looking to build an entire new capital from scratch in the middle of the desert so that they're less open to the risk of civilian uprisings; one of the primary causes for civilian dissatisfaction is economic issues.

Due to Houthi attacks at the Bab al-Mandab Strait, traffic through the Suez canal is down massively, and since the canal "represents almost 5% of the GNP and 10% of GDP and is one of Egypt’s most important sources of hard currency." (src) Various sources are reporting that trade through the canal is down 40-50%, which is putting more strain on the already unstable economic and political situation.

Finally, Egypt's population is about 110 million, but the governorate that shares a border with Israel and Gaza, North Sinai, has a population of barely 500,000. A push of one and a half million starving, injured people will, very suddenly, nearly quadruple the population of the governorate, and require extreme aid response from Egypt's government to keep alive and prevent a larger crisis in North Sinai and neighboring governorates.

The Middle East Stability Argument: Normalized Relations

What to say to your elected official: I am concerned that Israel's continued attack on Gaza is jeopardizing any chance of normalized relations with the Arab states in the future. American has put a lot of work into trying to get these various countries to normalize with Israel, and our funding of the current attacks on Gaza are sabotaging all that effort.

This one can be combined with the Iran-Backed Militias argument: Israel, in pursuit of revenge against Hamas, is setting itself up to be in more danger long-term, rather than less.

The International Trade Argument

What to say to your elected official: I am concerned about how the war in Gaza is impacting international trade and shipping costs. With the Suez Canal down to half its usual capacity and the Panama Canal raising costs and dropping capacity in response to the water restrictions, along with rising fuel costs in Europe and Asia, global trade is incredibly strained. We are being relegated to the Cape of Good Hope, Cape Horn, and the Malacca strait for much of intercontinental trade, and the macroeconomic projections are looking very bad for America.

The Domestic Economics Argument

What to say to your elected official: Many of the plans for Israeli military funding cause damage to other parts of the budget. For instance, a recent plan put forward by the Republicans of the House suggested IRS cuts in order to move that money, a plan which would impact the US budget negatively in the long term; we need those 14 billion being spent domestically, not supporting an overreaction/possible genocide in Gaza.

Explanation: In general, pick something receiving budget cuts that your congressperson will care about. I care about IRS funding, and saw it mentioned as a target in an article, so that's what I've got in my suggested verbiage up there.

The fewer people that are working for the IRS, the more they focus on auditing poor people (simple, easy taxes) and the less they can effectively audit rich people (complicated, time-consuming taxes), which means rich people are more likely to get away with evading millions or even billions in taxation. So yeah, you want more funding in the IRS if you are poor. They are already auditing you. You want them to audit the big guys.

The Russia and China Argument

What to say to your elected official: I am worried that the current focus on funding Israel without restriction is causing us to lose sight of the international threat posed by Russia and China. Russia is actively invading Ukraine, which continues to put massive strain on the European economy with regards to oil prices, especially with the Suez situation, and China has been testing missiles near Taiwan, and thus testing US responsiveness to those threats, for months now. We cannot afford to support an internationally unpopular war if we want to remain ready for Russia and China.

This is less likely to work on Republicans, since Trump is friendly with Russia, but hey, give it a shot if they're one of the ones who aren't fully in his camp.

EDIT 2/22/24: I'm a bit unsure of this tactic, but I'm putting it out there with hopes that someone with more political experience can offer feedback:

"Congress, and the US government in general, has promised to sanction Russia for the alleged assassination of one man within a week of the suspicious death, after five months of refusing to enact even slight consequences on Israel for the deaths of nearly thirty thousand, half of which are children. This is ethically questionable at best, but for the interests of elected officials, it is a very bad look. The mismatch shows a massive bias by the American government in regards to Israel's ongoing mass murder, with over two million facing famine as a result of Israel's aid blocking, and America's reputation on the world stage, as well as individual politicians' reputations domestically with constituents, is plummeting."

-------------------------------------

Finally, my ko-fi again. I spent a long time on this and I'd like to move out of my parents' house sooner rather than later. If you appreciate my time and effort, please feel free to donate a couple bucks.

[archangeldyke-all]

this with blue collar butch!Sevika 🥹👁️👁️

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTNAM4RrN/

this is too fucking cute i know i've already done like two stories about this exact same thing but idc it's SO SWEET

men and minors dni

most mornings, you wake up alone.

sevika's shifts start in the early morning, whereas yours start at a more reasonable hour. she usually sneaks out of bed and the house hours before you even begin to stir.

and then, usually when you do wake up, you're in a mad dash to leave the house on time.

this morning though, you woke up about an hour before your alarm's was meant to go off.

you groan and flop on your side, trying for a few minutes to go back to sleep, only to give up five minutes later and smack the bedside table for your phone.

you read the news, catch up on emails.

you've only got one new text-- the same text that greets you most mornings: 'good morning love. left breakfast in the fridge for you. thinking pizza for dinner tonight? xoxo 💐💍 -s'

you smile big and bright like you do every morning, then jump out of bed to the kitchen, excited to see what sevika's made for breakfast and give her your compliments over text.

only, as you run into the kitchen, your eyes catch on sevika's lunch pail and her travel coffee mug resting on the counter.

you realize now why your body so stubbornly refused to go back to bed for an hour: some subconscious part of you must've known sevika would need your rescue this morning. (sevika swears that since you've been married you've developed some kind of couple-telepathy-- both of you are always supernaturally aware of the state the other is in, without having to even see each other.)

you decide to surprise her, dressing and eating quickly, withholding your usual lovey-dovey texts to her in exchange for the real life smooches you'll soon be pressing on your wife's cheek.

you love seeing sevika at work. she looks so fucking handsome in her uniform, her co-workers adore you, and the brilliant, surprised smile you pull out of her when you drop in to check on her always gives you butterflies.

you slip in through the front door, waving at thieram where he's talking on the phone behind the front desk. he grins, gestures to the break room, and winks at you.

it looks like they're in their morning meeting, silco and vander standing at the front of the room and reading off clipboards while sevika, ran and the rest of the boys fidget in their seats.

when you peek your head in, all the heads swivel to the back of the room to gawk at you. laughter and greetings erupt, and sevika's face breaks into that glorious shy smile of hers as she leaps out of her chair and runs over to you.

"baby, what're you doin' here?" sevika asks, pulling you in for a kiss before you can respond. you giggle against her lips, then reveal her lunch and coffee to her.

"you forgot somethin'. think our weird psychic link woke me up to make sure i could get you your food before work." you tease. sevika blinks down at her lunch pail and coffee cup like you've just handed her keys to a new car. you giggle, and kiss her cheek. "breakfast was delicious by the way."

"i love you so fuckin' much." sevika whispers, blinking back up at you. you smile, and sevika shoots forward, kissing you passionately in the doorframe.

her co-workers burst into cat-calls and laughter, and silco clears his throat from the front of the room.

sevika pulls away with a bright red blush, but she doesn't take her eyes off of you as she walks backwards back toward her seat. she bumps into lock. he shoves her away, and she stumbles a bit, giggling but still staring at you as she flops back into her chair.

you blow her a kiss, wink, and let the door close.

taglist!

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[vbecker10]

What Prank?

Laundry Day (Loki x female reader Y/N)

How Could This Not Fit?! (Loki x fem reader Y/N)

Loads of a Fun (Bucky x female reader Y/N)

Pairing: Bucky x female reader (Y/N)

Summary: You and Bucky plan a week's worth of pranks to get back at Sam for telling Bucky the toaster was voice activated. A few days in, several members of the team decide to join in on the pranks without even questioning who is behind it.

A/N: So in Laundry Day (linked above) I wrote an off hand little comment about how much laundry Bucky needed to do and it led to Loads of Fun (also linked above). In that one, I mentioned a joke Sam pulled on Bucky and based on a poll I did, people wanted Bucky to get back at him so here we are 💚

This is not the same Y/N from Laundry Day & How Could This Not Fit?!, this is a different one. Apparently a bunch of women in the Tower have the same name as you (haha sorry that's dumb but I wanted them both to be Y/N fics so here we are)

Bucky's arm settles around your waist and he pulls you closer to him on the couch as you shut your laptop. "That's everything," you tell him with a triumphant smile.

"I really appreciate all of your help with this," he tells you and you turn to look at him. "I never would have even thought to do any of this myself."

"I'm happy to help. I hate when people mess with someone I like," you respond.

"Wait, you like me?" he asks jokingly.

You hit him lightly with a pillow, "I think I've made myself awkwardly clear about that."

He laughs and takes the pillow from you easily, "I'm just checking because I like you too." He moves his hand to the back of your neck and kisses you, when he pulls away he smirks and says, "You're an evil genius, you know that right?"

You giggle, "You have no idea."

Day 1

You sit at your desk, watching the clock closely as you wait for Sam's call. Ten minutes after 8, he finally reaches out and you answer professionally, "Stark Industries Technical Support, this is Y/N, how can I help you this morning?"

"Hi Y/N, it's Sam Wilson. There's something wrong with my ID badge I think, or my entry panel maybe. I'm not sure but I can't get into my office," he tells you.

"Oh no, that's not good. I'm going to put you on hold for a few moments while I look into this for you," you tell him and he says okay. After refilling your bottle with water from the kitchen down the hall, you take him off hold. "Hi Sam, sorry that took so long. Computer is a bit slow this morning," you make up an excuse and he asks if you figured out what's wrong with his door. "Yes, looks like we need to run a quick update on your entry panel. Should be about five minutes or so," you lie easily.

"Okay, thanks," he says but you can hear the annoyance in his voice before he hangs up.

You go back to checking your emails and five minutes later, you unlock Sam's office with a smile. Your phone vibrates, alerting you to a new text from Bucky, he has gotten so much better at sending them in the last few days.

<Hi doll, sounds like your plan is going well. I can hear Sam cursing up a storm from my office.>

You laugh at the thought of Sam being that annoyed and send him a quick text back.

<I think it's working so far 😈 He should be calling again any second.>

As if on cue, your office phone rings. "Hi Y/N, it's me again," he says in a defeated tone. "I can't log into my computer."

"Well aren't you having the worst luck this morning," you tell him. You pretend to type loudly so he can hear it, "Looks like your password expired. I'll set you up with a new temporary one and then you should be good to go." He tells you thanks again and you wish him luck before hanging up.

Fifteen minutes later, your phone rings a third time. "Its Sam again," he says as soon as you answer. "There's something wrong with my computer now. I can't get my email to open and all my programs are freaking out."

"Oh no... I see what the issue is," you say dramatically and he sighs over the phone. "It looks like your computer needs to do a pretty massive update." He asks you how massive and you respond, "About an hour... maybe an hour and a half."

As soon as you and Sam hang up, Pepper calls him and he immediately knows he's in for a long day. "Did you finish the reports for the briefing this afternoon?" she asks.

"Not yet, I've been having a lot of really weird tech issues today," he explains. "IT is on it but it's going to take a while to get me up and running."

"That's unfortunate," she says but there is no sympathy in her voice. "I suggest you work through lunch if needed, those reports were supposed to be on my desk last night."

"I'll get them done," he promises then hangs up. With a loud groan, he drops his head heavily on his desk.

Day 2

Sam complains to Steve and Bucky about all of his computer issues while on their way to his office. He opens the door and Bucky jokes, "Sounds like the tech gods were really pissed off at you, huh?"

"I guess, it really was the weirdest thing," Sam says shaking his head. Bucky and Steve each take a seat and Sam goes to sit behind his desk. As soon as he relaxes into his chair, the seat detaches from the base and he falls to the ground with a loud scream of surprise.

Sam gets up quickly from the floor as his friends come around to the other side of the desk. "Someone is messing with me," he declares over Bucky's laughter.

"Why would anyone do that?" he asks, trying to compose himself. "Not like you've ever pranked anyone around here and would deserve a little revenge."

"Not helpful Buck," Steve rolls his eyes. "Are you okay Sam?"

"Yea," he answers while he examines the chair. "Did you do this?"

"Me?" Bucky asks in response. "I can't even figure out how to use the toaster. How would I have broken into your office?"

Sam is obviously unconvinced and also on the right track. Last night after dinner, you unlocked Sam's office so Bucky could remove almost all of the screws from his chair. That wasn't the only prank you set in motion last night though. As per your plan, Bucky suggests they call maintenance for a new chair and get coffee while they wait.

Tony walks into the kitchen a few moments after the three of them and asks if they like the new coffee maker he just got. Sam pushes the button to make a medium size cup and turns to face him, "First time trying it out."

"Well be nice to it," Tony warns in a joking manner. "I had to lie to Pepper about how much the damn thing cost me but it's worth it for a perfect cup of-"

Tony's words are cut off my Sam swearing as the coffee begins to spill everywhere. The mug overflows and leaks all over the marble counter. Sam tries to press the off button to stop it but it continues to pour out.

"Don't hit it, just press it gently," Tony grumbles as he moves quickly towards his new favorite appliance.

"I am pressing it gently, it's not working," Sam says in a slightly panicked tone as the coffee spills onto the floor.

"How much coffee can that thing make?" Steve asks in shock as he backs up from the growing puddle.

Bucky shakes his head, his hand over his mouth to cover his laughter as he watches the scene unfold. He takes out his phone and sends you a text.

<Check out the security cameras in the kitchen. It worked perfectly>

Tony unplugs the uncooperative machine from the wall and looks angrily at Sam, "Do not touch this again."

"I barely touched it this time!" he counters as he moves away from the massive mess of spilled coffee. "I told them, someone is messing with me."

You reply back after pulling up the live feed.

<🤣🤣 Bonus points for Tony being so annoyed!>

"And how would this mystery person know you were going to use the coffee maker next?" Tony asks with his arms crossed.

"I have no idea," Sam sighs, rubbing his face.

"Just get back to work," he says, "And quit being so damn paranoid."

Day 3

Your head rests against Bucky's chest, his arm holding you comfortably as you watch a movie in his room. Half way through the movie, Bucky's phone begins to vibrate on the coffee table. "Hey Sam, what's-" Bucky answers but you can hear Sam yelling faintly over him.

"Put it on speaker," you whisper and he looks at you confused. You smile and take the phone, showing him how to change the setting and he nods as the background noise becomes louder.

"I can barely hear you," Bucky says and you cover your mouth to keep quiet.

"I said, my apartment is going crazy!" Sam yells over the sound of the TV and other appliances.

"What are you talking about?" Bucky asks, his voice serious. He keeps his eyes on you and you try not to giggle.

"I don't know! I flipped the switch for the lights and the TV turned on full volume. I tried to turn it off but the remote doesn't work. The volume buttons control the air conditioner, the power button opens and closes my blinds, I even tried going in the menu but it turned on my freaking blender. How does that even happen?" he asks frantically.

"I have no idea what you want me to do," Bucky says and you shrug dramatically as if you don't know what is causing it either. "Sounds like your place is possessed," he adds. You giggle and he holds the phone away from himself to place a quick kiss on your cheek.

"I tried to call tech support but they are closed for the night," he explains. "Did you ever get the number for the woman in IT you know?"

"Who?" Bucky plays dumb.

He groans and you can hear the vacuum turn on, he must have tried another button on the reprogrammed remote. "The one you keep telling us is cute! Y/N, right? I talked to her the other day about my computer stuff," Sam says as the TV volume increases and decreases at random.

He blushes, he had forgotten he told Steve and Sam he wanted to talk to you weeks ago. "No, I chickened out of talking to her," he lies.

"Of course you freaking did!" Sam yells and you can practically hear him roll his eyes, "Screw this I'm gonna sleep in the common room tonight."

Bucky hangs up and tosses his phone back onto the table. You tap his shoulder with a smirk, "So... you think I'm cute, huh?"

He laughs, "Very." He kisses you and you lean into him as his arms wrap around you.

You curl up against him on the couch again then sit up suddenly. "What's wrong?" he asks when you get up.

You open your backpack and look over at him, "I brought my laptop... I can turn off the stuff in his room so if anyone checks, everything will be fine."

"Remind me never to get on your bad side," he laughs and you kiss him when you sit next to him again.

Day 4

Sam finishes adjusting his suit as he walks into the training room with Clint, Bucky and Scott. Tony checks a few settings on his control panel while Thor and Loki finish up their sparing session.

When the door closes Loki chuckles and turns his attention from his brother to Sam. "I heard you had quite the night," the God of Mischief smirks.

"Seriously, even Loki knows?" Sam throws his hands on the air.

"I think the whole tower knows you think you someone is pulling weird pranks on you," Scott chimes in.

"I'm not paranoid," Sam says. "Someone here is out to get me."

"That sounds like something a paranoid person would say," Loki shrugs and Thor laughs loudly at his comment.

"I don't like agreeing with Reindeer Games but he has a point," Tony jokes, ignoring the side eye from Loki at his least favorite nickname.

"Fine, whatever," Sam gives up. "Can we just get this over with?"

"Yep," Tony agrees and motions for everyone to get back a bit so Sam can spread the wings on his new gear. He puts his goggles on and turns around, checking to see that everything is in place but his focus shifts when everyone beaks out into laughter.

"What now?" Sam asks, turning back to face the group.

"Nothing, I think we all just like the new look," Bucky says with a smile.

"What the hell?" Sam exclaimes when he catches sight of the back of his wings in the windows.

Bucky snaps a picture, thankful you showed him how to do that a few days ago, and sends it to you.

<I had no idea you were going to do this too! This is amazing!>

You open the picture of Sam's wings covered in googly eyes of every size and color, causing you to nearly spit out your water with laughter.

<I didn't do that... but I am a huge fan of whoever did it 🤣🤣🤣>

Sam looks angrily at Loki, "Why are you messing with me?" He pulls down his goggles and walks over to him.

Loki scoffs, unintimidated by the Falcon and says, "If I was 'messing with you' I would have done more then put paint on your eyewear."

He turns back towards the window quickly and sees two thick black rings of paint around his eyes. "Come on! What the hell guys?" he groans.

Bucky, Scott and Clint can barely keep themselves together long enough to deny they had anything to do with this new prank.

Thor almost looks offended and asks, "How come no one assumes it was me?"

Tony pats him on the back and says, "You're not exactly known for being stealthy." He crosses his arms but nods in agreement. "Alright, now that... that whole thing is out of our systems, let's see what the new wings can do," Tony suggests, bringing everyone back to their original reason for being there.

Sam agrees and everyone moves back a bit to watch him take off. Bucky let's a small smile slip when Sam tries to turn left to circle around the room but his suit doesn't respond correctly. He grows increasingly more confused and annoyed as he discovers his controls are reversed.

He lands after only a few minutes and Clint asks, "First time flying? That was rough to watch."

"Shut up," he answers, fiddling with the computer on his wrist as Tony walks over.

"I'll get this thing debugged and we can try again tomorrow, Tony tells him. He nods and leaves with a loud sigh. Bucky and Steve turn to leave as well but Bucky catches Clint and Scott nodding proudly to each other. He chuckles when he spots a googly eye stuck to Scott's shoe.

Day 5

"I am so over this," Sam tells Steve and Bucky as the walk towards the kitchen. "When I find out who is doing all of this they better apologize like hell cause I'm furious," he threatens and Bucky practically bites his tongue to stay quiet.

His phone chimes in his pocket and says, "New text message to Director Nicholas Fury."

"Shut up," he says as he takes his phone out of his pocket.

It chimes again, "Texting, 'shut up'."

"No, no, no! Cancel, cancel," he says, frantically hitting buttons but none of them work to stop it.

"Text message sent," it alerts him with another chime and he rubs his face.

"What the heck was that?" Steve asks.

"I don't know... It's been doing that all day," he says. "I talked to Y/N and she said she is going to have a new phone sent up to me as soon as Stark approves it."

"Y/N, the woman Bucky likes-" Steve starts to ask with a smile but he's interrupted.

"New text message to Tony Stark," his phone says.

"I hate you," he tells the phone as he tries to turn it off.

The phones responds, "Texting, "I hate you'."

He groans and Bucky begins to lose the battle to hold back his laughter. "What is wrong with you?" Sam struggles with the device.

"Texting, 'What is wrong with you?'" it again repeats Sam.

"Stop talking to it," Steve suggests.

"Texting, 'Stop talking'," the phone adds and Steve cringes. "Text message sent."

"I'm gonna get fired," he says and slumps against the wall.

"Finding instructions on how to make fire," it says as if that is helpful.

His phone chimes to alert him to an incoming text message. "Oh good... it's Tony," he says sarcastically.

"Could be worse," Bucky says with a smile and Sam looks up at him skeptically.

His phone chimes again. "It's Fury," he says with a loud sigh.

Bucky laughs, "See, now it's worse." Steve smacks him in the shoulder and shakes his head disapprovingly but Bucky can see the smile on his face.

Later that night, most of the team is relaxing in the common room until Sam walks in angrily. He slams his laundry basket on the coffee table in front of Natasha, Clint and Wanda. Loki looks up from his book in the corner of the room and Bucky follows Steve in from the kitchen.

"Who did it?" Sam asks.

"Oh, what horrible prank where you the victim of this time?" Loki asks with a smirk as he gets up from his seat.

He pulls out his bedsheets which are all different shades of pink, "Which one of you did this? These were new."

Bucky takes out his phone and quickly finds your chat. You text him back, showing the picture of the pink sheets to your friends who joined you for dinner.

<Omg, they did not!? That's amazing 🤣🤣 I can't believe other people joined in like this>

Nat giggles and says, "I don't know but it is a really nice color."

Steve calmly says, "It might not have been on purpose. Someone probably forgot a red shirt or something in the machine."

"No, this is definitely on purpose," he argues with Steve. "I'm going to find out who is doing this."

He grabs the basket and leaves the room angrily. Bucky doesn't watch him leave, he's too focused on Wanda winking at Nat.

Day 6

Sam sits at the far end of the large oval table in the conference room, fuming with his arms crossed.

Loki smiles wide as he takes a seat next to him. He leans close and asks, "What seems to be the trouble today?"

"I don't want to talk about it," Sam responds.

Loki doesn't give up and says, "I think you should share with the team, it might make you feel better. Besides, I'm sure we're all curious as to why you are so annoyed this morning."

Before he can reply, Fury walks into the briefing room. He slams the door shut, which gets everyone's attention at once. He stands in the front of the room, covered in glitter as he glares at Sam. "We need to talk Wilson," he tells him.

"I didn't..." he stands slowly. "You don't think I did that?"

"You left your ID badge on my desk," he holds it up by the lanyard. Sam looks at him in shock then pats his pants and jacket as if it will suddenly appear on his person.

Loki laughs so hard, he slaps the desk and says, "This is the best week I have had in decades. I don't think I've been this entertained since humans celebrated the first April Fools Day."

Sam looks at Loki and then back to Fury, "It has to be him. Do you really think I would be stupid enough to glitter bomb you and leave my ID badge?"

"I have already told you, I have not participated in your torment," Loki says. "I am merely enjoying it."

Thor adds, "Trust me, if it was my brother, he would not deny it."

"Fine, so it's not him but it's one of you," Sam looks around the room at the full table.

Fury stands unconvinced at the front of the room, his arms crossed against his chest. "You have until the end of the day to pick up every single piece of glitter," he tells Sam then he takes a seat at the head of the table to start the meeting.

Loki whispers to Sam, "I must admit, I'm really beginning to like whoever is doing this to you."

Sam rolls his eyes and says, "Oh this person you like? I thought you hated all 'humans'."

Loki corrects him, "I am generally indifferent towards your existence, that's not quite the same as hate."

"I'm not sure if that makes me feel better or not," Sam says and Loki shrugs in response.

Day 7

Sam wanders into the kitchen in the morning, yawning from lack of sleep. He had stayed up most of the night trying to figure out who was behind all of the pranks. He assumed most of the team could have done the laundry prank or googly eyes but he didn't know anyone with the tech skills to pull off the other ones.

He stops short when he sees you and Bucky together, he stands behind you with his arms around your waist. You look up at him and kiss his cheek before you notice Sam.

Sam is confused and says, "Wait are you guys together? I thought you said you didn't talk to her..."

Bucky smirks and says, "Oh yeah, I guess I lied."

"How long..." you can see him trying to figure out if you had been together long enough to aid in his pranking.

You smile at his confusion and ask, "Wanna see something cool?" He shrugs, still processing your relationship. "Bucky told me the new toaster is voice activated."

"Oh shit," Sam slowly starts to realize what set off this whole chain reaction of pranks. "Bucky, it was just a joke. It's not actually voice activated, you know that right?"

You smile and say, "Oh, then how come this happens?" You push the button on your phone inside your pocket and say, "Toast." A few seconds later, two perfectly toasted pieces of bread pop out.

"What the hell?" Sam asks, you and Bucky laugh in response. He turns and walks back out of the kitchen, nearly walking right into Tony.

"Morning," Tony greets you both as he sets up his now fixed coffee maker. "I gotta say, I'm pretty impressed with you Y/N."

"With what?" you suddenly feel nervous.

He smiles and asks, "Did you really think you could get into all of my systems without me noticing?"

Bucky moves slightly in front of you and says, "Don't fire her, it's my fault. I asked her to help. We just wanted to get back at him a little."

Tony laughs, takes a sip of his coffee and says, "Oh, I'm not mad. I actually am very impressed by how well you got into every part of the towers tech, we should probably talk about a promotion into our security division."

You look at him speechless, you had always wanted to work in that department.

"Also," he adds, "I had that glitter bomb for almost a year and I couldn't figure out how set it off in Fury's office without getting blamed for it so thank you for the distraction."

"Um... you're welcome," you tell him with a laugh.

"Barnes, you're luck she is on your side," he says as he turns to leave. "She's absolutely terrifying."

Bucky pulls you closer, looks at you and says, "I know I'm lucky."

I hope you liked this!! Please like, share and comment if you did 💚💚 Please let me know if you want to be added to my taglist!

@soubi001 @mochie85 @lokiswife-dark-fox-queen @animnerd @cabingrlandrandomcrap @icytrickster17 @lokisgoodgirl @mischief2sarawr @stupidthoughtsinwriting @mjsthrillernp @holdmytesseract @lulubelle814 @goblingirlsarah @foxherder @alexakeyloveloki @siconetribal @jiyascepter @eleniblue @loreniscrying @muddyorbsblr @alyeskathewave @loz-3 @firedrakegirl @javagirl328 @princess-ofthe-pages @morally-grey-variant @soulpiercing @km-ffluv @yeehawbrothers

[edenfenixblogs]

hello! I’m not a Jewish person (ethnically or religiously), but I was wondering if you know of any ways that I can help Jewish people right now? Like if you know of any donation programs or volunteer work or food drives or anything of the sort that I could do to help? I want to help fight antisemitism and help Jewish people beyond simply spreading awareness on Instagram, but I’m not exactly sure how or where to start. This is a very dumb question, I’m so sorry, you can ignore this if you want

(CONT'D) also, I have another question, I’m so sorry To preface this question, I’d like to say that I’m a very stupid individual who knows absolutely nothing about anything. So the question is, do you have any book or article recommendations that showcase Jewish people’s experiences, values, perspectives, etc. Like for example, are there any books written from the perspective of an Israeli/jewish person who had moved from wherever they were to the state of Israel in 1948 (I apologise if this is a horrible example, I just know absolutely nothing about anything and everything, but I’m open to learning)

Thank you so much for asking these valuable questions!!!!! (And thanks for being patient until I was able to answer!)

Neither of your questions are dumb, and you don't need to be sorry! You're not stupid and I hope you can be as kind to yourself as you have been to me and my community in your questions.

I was wondering if you know of any ways that I can help Jewish people right now?

Truly the very best thing you can do to support Jews at this time is routinely check in on us, speak up for us, and correct misinformation or antisemitism if you see it happening. This means not running away if your Jewish friends mention two antisemitic experiences they've had in one week. This means adding a media bias/fact check link when someone sends you antisemitic propaganda from Al Jazeera. This means saying "Hey. That doesn't help Palestine. That just hurts Jews," when someone's "activism" veers too far in the wrong direction. That means that you don't just shout ceasefire now without also acknowledging that Hamas and Hezbollah also need to cease firing. This means making sure your donations and your links to donations go to sources that do not fund Hamas, like Anera. It also means making sure your donations for the I/P conflict support interfaith efforts whenever possible. I routinely promote the interfaith and intercultural organizations represented within AllMEP; https://www.allmep.org/ Also, steer clear of culturally expropriating organizations like JVP.

Like if you know of any donation programs or volunteer work or food drives or anything of the sort that I could do to help?

Ones that specifically help Jews, you mean? I don't actually! Unfortunately, the international conversation since 10/7 has had very little to do with how to help Jews in Israel or in diaspora. I would say that you should look into and perhaps even email or call your local synagogues and see if they have any kind of fund for their buildings or if they're trying to raise money to pay security and donating to them. Aside from that, I'd love for my followers to weigh in on this, as they'll know better.

Book Recommendations!

These aren't exactly what you're looking for. But I believe deeply in my heart that every single non-Jewish person should read:

Jews Don't Count by David Baddiel

People Love Dead Jews by Dara Horn

Night by Elie Wiesel

There are plenty of other books that are less of a bummer to read than those, too. But I think for any non-Jew to truly understand us they need to understand the unexamined antisemitism they carry with them and they need to have true, first-hand accounts about the holocaust to understand the legacy it left to us as well as what it took away.

Followers with more specific recommendations, please offer your advice in comments or replies or reblogs or tags! I'm just one person. I don't claim to speak for my entire community, nor have I ever. But I think, as a larger community, we can all steer you in the right direction, Thank you!!!!!

[nyerus]

🎧A Guide to the TGCF Audio Drama🎭

With the release of the new season of the fabulous TGCF audio drama, I wanted to make an updated guide on how to make an account, purchase, and listen (with English subs) to it! Hopefully, this will help more people enjoy it and join in on the fun!

As a quick reminder, the audio drama is based on the revised version of the novel! It's a very faithful adaptation, but if you're a new fan, that might throw you for a loop! If you need an overview of the different versions of TGCF, check out this post first!

Part One: Making an Account & Purchasing

The process is a lot easier than you may expect! The site where the audio drama is hosted is "missevan.com," also known as "MaoerFM." They are one and the same!

Check out these infographics to create an account and buy the audio drama. (Due to tumblr compression, they may be difficult to read. If this is the case, please view these images in full-screen and preferably on a web browser for best quality!)

ADDITIONAL INFORMATION

General Info:

It costs 319 diamonds for the first season, and 359 diamonds for the second season of the TGCF audio drama. This was less than $5 USD, for each season. Future seasons will likely be similarly priced.

Episodes typically release weekly. Mini-episodes/bonus content releases intermittently, and often continues after the main season "ends."

This guide will work for any other audio dramas you want to purchase and support (such as MDZS)! They obviously have different costs, but the process of buying is pretty much the same.

Account/Registration Info:

If you do not see your country/region code listed when making an account, it is unfortunately unavailable there. I do not know any workarounds at the moment, apart from asking a friend/relative in a different country to help you out! If anyone does know other options, please let me know!

Step One of the guide is technically optional, as logging in on the app for the first time will automatically create a new account, if there’s not already one associated with your mobile phone number. I recommend doing that step anyway, as it will ensure that you have a password linked to your account. Several people in the past have reported that they sometimes cannot receive the verification code to log in. (Especially from South America and SEA for some reason.) Having a password bypasses this, if it happens to you.

Unfortunately, it seems that you MUST register with a mobile number to begin with.

Otherwise, you can use an existing Bilibili/QQ/WeChat/Weibo account if you have it. They all require a number for registration too, as far as I know, so you may run into the same problem. They may still be worth trying if you have no other options! Once again, if anyone is aware of other workarounds, do let me know.

Additionally, it’s possible to link your account to an email AFTER you register with a mobile number. (There’s no escaping that, from what I can tell.) You can then use that to log in.

It seems useful to have your email and a password associated with your account, especially in case your country code gets nixed from availability -- which has been known to happen without warning in the past.

The mobile browser seems to prefer you log in with a number/email and a password, rather than a verification code.

LINKING AN E-MAIL TO YOUR ACCOUNT (Optional)

This must be done via web browser, or with your mobile browser set to desktop mode. It’s VERY easy if you use a browser with an auto-translate feature like Google Chrome:

(These images are the MTL translated versions!)

Unfortunately yes, you will need to receive a verification code via mobile number to enable this. The second verification code gets sent to your email, though! (Try not to lose your password, because I'm pretty sure you'll still have to use your phone to verify and change it.) Don't forget to check your spam folder if you don't see it. It will be from "猫耳FM."

Once again, this is optional! I just wanted to include it as an extra avenue for people who may struggle with the verification codes, as they can be finicky. And it happened to me while I was making this section, so I knew I had to....

Part Two: How to Enable English Subtitles

First things first: there are no official English subs for the TGCF Audio Drama. Though I'm fairly sure this applies to all dramas on MaoerFM.

However, there are Chinese (Simplified) subs for each episode.

OPTION ONE: MTL

The main method that non-Chinese speakers have been using to understand the Audio Drama is via MTL (machine translation) on those subs! Browsers like Google Chrome not only have auto-translate, but it works in real time as you watch/listen to the episode.

Make sure that it's turned on and that you've selected English -- or your preferred output language!

Be aware there are TWO types of subtitles on MaoerFM. There are the official subs, and the temporary subs.

At the bottom of the audio player, there is a button labelled "字幕," which is circled in purple in the image below. If it is there, it means that episode has official subs available, and you can toggle them on/off. Meanwhile, the "弹" that the green arrow is pointing to is known as the "barrage." That's the scrolling text that you will see filling the screen. It's other fans screaming and crying in chat. You can turn it off if it feels overwhelming!

New episodes may take anywhere from a few hours to a day or two to be officially subtitled. (The bonus episodes don't have official subs for whatever reason.) In the meantime, there will be subtitlers working on adding temporary subs! I'd advise waiting a little while before listening to a new episode so they have more time to work, and you'll have better coverage!

While official subs are entirely separate, the temporary subs are part of the barrage. So you will have to keep the barrage turned on. (Notice how there is no "字幕" button next to it yet!) Unlike the rest of the barrage, the subs will be stationary, color-coded, and at the very bottom of the window -- so they're easy to differentiate.

However, since the barrage can be a lot if you aren't used to it, there is a way around it.

Hit the settings menu (blue circle) and block the scrolling comments. You can also turn off the top ones, but just make sure not to turn off the bottom ones -- because those are the subs!

DO NOTE that this all works best on desktop! If everything's gone correctly, you should have something like these:

Right -- regular view, temporary subs Left -- full-screen, official subs

It's possible to get this to work on mobile if you enable desktop mode in your Chrome app. You will probably need to refresh a few times after that, or open the page in a new tab to have it work properly. Then it's the same steps as above!

You should have something like these:

Right -- landscape mode Left -- portrait mode

The scaling on mobile can be troublesome, and I have noticed that the auto-translate is slower than on desktop. It seems to take an extra second or two to work on each line -- whereas on desktop it's pretty instant -- and that can get annoying, especially in fast-paced scenes.

Additional Info:

This does not work for the mobile app! It is for the website ONLY!

If the translation stops working, refreshing usually fixes it.

There are potentially other options to using Chrome. Any browser that has an auto-translate will work, assuming it's as quick as Chrome's. If anyone has tried other browsers and seen success, please leave a reply!

OPTION TWO: FANSUBS

TreasureChestSubs here on tumblr have been doing high-quality fansubs for several audio dramas, including TGCF as of recently! However, at the time of making this guide, their TGCF translations currently only cover the first few episodes of season one. You will need to request an invite to their Discord server via the form in their posts. Please do check them out if you're interested.

I don't personally know of any other fansubbers who are actively working on the audio drama right now. But I do want to mention that Xyra_Rei on twitter has a Discord server where they share some translated snippets from various episodes. There are other great resources by fellow fans, too. Links and more info about the server can be found in the pinned post on their profile!

Part Three: Enjoy!!!

I hope this updated guide helps more people experience the wonder that is the TGCF audio drama (or really, any audio drama)! I cannot overstate how good it is in every aspect, and I think every TGCF fan deserves to be able to hear it for themselves! 💖

[antimony-medusa]

How To Set Up An Ao3 Exchange

One of the first things I say whenever anyone asks me about running exchanges is that if you have more than about 30 people in the exchange, do NOT try to match it by hand. That is so much work and takes so much time. Use Ao3's matching algorithm. And people say sure, and then they look at how Ao3 works and they go uhhhhhhhhhh I think we can make a google form work. Because google forms are reasonably intuitive to make work, and Ao3 exchanges are— not.

But the thing is, once you understand the underlying logic for Ao3 collections, they are not that bad, and seriously I can't overstate the benefit of having Ao3 do the matching for you. That's like the difference between 80 hours of curating data as it comes in and then matching it (what happened with hand-matching 325 people for holiday exchange), or 2 hours of double-checking the matching (what happened with matching 125 people for 48 hour exchange). You have to put in extra work to get an Ao3 exchange set up, but it super pays off in the end. So! Here is an intro to how Ao3 exchanges work on the back end. This explanation assumes you know how to sign up for an exchange because I've posted ones like that before, for example, here.

Let's get into it.

THE COLLECTION

The first thing you want to do is set up your exchange collection. If you go to your right-hand drop-down menu, you click on My Collections.

That brings you to every collection you have ever made, and you go to to the right and click "New collection".

That brings you into the back end of the collection. You want to go down and put in a name for the collection that will be the url (so no spaces), a display name, an email for the collection to email when something happens to the collection (this will be public, so use a fandom email), and a basic description.

There's places there to do custom icons and headers, but those are optional, but you can go in and make your exchange pretty later if you want!

We are still in the "setting up" stage of the exchange, so once we go to preferences, you want to select all the tick boxes and make it look like this.

Moderated means that you'll have to manually approve things to be added to the collection (not absolutely necessary but can keep out trolls, and it also means that you can manually check that gifts meet minimums before you let them in to the exchange), Closed means that no one can submit things to the collection yet (once you open your exchange you de-select this), Unrevealed means that any works in the collection will show up as "mystery works" and not be readable (so you keep it unrevealed until the posting date, so people can post early but not spoil the surprise), anonymous means that all authors will be anonymous (this depends on if you have an anonymous portion of your exchange, so it's optional), "show random works" just means that you get a selection of different works when people visit the collection at different times, "send a message to the collection email" is optional but is useful for moderation (like if you're checking people off a list when their gifts get delivered), and "type of challenge" you want to be set to "gift exchange".

and then on this page the only other things of concern are places where you can put in an FAQ, a description and some instructions, but those are all optional! I normally host the FAQ on tumblr, so I just say "go check the tumblr at [link]".

And then you hit the submit button.

Now we get into the nitty-gritty.

First up is some optional stuff— you can add in the times that you're going to do things! This is useful for communication, but not necessary. We're still setting everything up, so you do not want Sign-Ups to be open, that is only selected once you have everything ready to go.

Then scrolling down, you get to Requests and Offers.

This is where you specify the absolute minimum ships or characters that you want people to give you to sign up. 10 is the maximum Ao3 allows, so I always set it to 10 for both "allowed", which is the maximum the site will allow. And required is the low number. I usually set it to a minimum of three, to make sure someone doesn't sign up with "i will only write one ship" or something. This way, people will have to do a minimum of three separate requests and offers.

The "requests visible" is part of the back end thing, and it's up to you if you want to select it or not. If you keep it unselected, the only person who will be able to see requests is the mods, and eventually each person will see their assignment. If you select it, people will be able to browse everyone's requests and both maybe target offers so they can write for a specific person, and be able to find treats (extra bonus gifts) to write for people whose requests they like. Each side has its own benefits or negatives, it's up to you which ones you want to go with!

And here we get into more of the matching info! Let's look at Request Settings.

Now this is what the settings would look like for a multi-fandom exchange. The "details/description" box you want to make mandatory because that is where people will put their DNW and their prompts (and you absolutely want to make sure everyone has a DNW), and the url is an optional one which lets people link an off-site letter on google docs or dreamwidth.

Fandom allowing up to three fandoms means that people can do crossovers if they want (or tag a request something like 3rd life/hermitcraft), and if I wanted to say that people had to request 3 separate servers I would say "must be unique" but I'm okay if people sign up with three Dream SMP relationships in this idea hypothetical exchange, so I'm not selecting the unique button.

I'm ignoring the characters button cause that's extra complication, the only other thing I want to look at is the relationship button. A minimum of 1 ship per request (and there's a minimum of three requests), and let's say you can go up to 20, so people can request LOTS of different ships. I did select "must be unique" so someone can't sign up with the same ship three times. The "allow any" button is off, which means that I will have to select relationships that fit under the fandom that I selected one up, I can't request Shubble/Niki Nihachu (Origins), and put it with a fandom request for Hermitcraft. This has set it so that the absolutely minimum someone can sign up with is 3 relationships (3 requests * 1 relationship each), and the absolute maximum is 200 relationships (10 requests * 20 relationships each).

Requests will look much the same, except I am not putting down details/description or a URL, because I'm not letting people submit requests about what ship they "really" want to match on, they are going to be equally matchable to everyone they offered. Some exchanges will let you submit a requests DNW, but honestly that is so much extra work for the mods, I would not recommend it unless you think it's necessary to stop people from dropping their gifts later.

Okay, so now we take a brief digression into a tag set.

THE TAG SET

Okay so basically a tag set is an extra set of sliders that lets you fine-tune your exchange. If you do not use a tag set, when people sign up they will be able to use every canon tag on the archive, and only canon tags. Which is a LOT of tags, but when I ran an exchange without a tag set there were multiple times of hitting non-canon relationships or tags. But it's also a definite extra complication, tag sets are extra fiddly work and they are even less intituive. If you just want to go without a tag set, skip down to the matching segment. If you do want to avoid hitting people signing up with non-canon tags, keep reading.

I'm gonna say right off the bat that tag sets are the single most like "oh I am getting into the GUTS of the machine" part of running Ao3 exchanges, but if you can make them work they can super streamline both the sign-up (for your participants ) and the matching process (for you).

Oh boy, tag sets. Here we start getting into how exchanges start squeezing the interface to make it do what we want it to. I'm using a tag set, so first I clicked on the "tag set" url there and I made my tag set, and then I came back and selected its name from the drop-down menu on the collection. I leave all the tick boxes open, because selecting them will again restrict you to canon tags, and we specifically want to be open to noncanon tags both because of issues like "ijevin & tiny tim" not being a canon tag, and because the way MCYT tags are wrangled and made canon does not work for how the exchange machine reads information. We specifically want a collection of non-canon tags tuned for our needs. More on that later.

So, I started a new tag set, and I'm over there on that screen, looking at it. What does that screen look like?

Okay so, part of the appeal of a tag set is that your participants are able to specify the difference between "Rendog & InTheLittleWood" and "Rendog/InTheLittleWood". You don't have to worry about people getting undesired shipping, because people were specifying if they wanted shipping when they signed up. You can reduce a great deal of people getting matched badly by using relationship matching, because most of the time even if people want a Tommy-centric fic, there's a pretty big difference between people who want "Tommy & Technoblade" and "Tommy & Dream". By specifying who you want the gift to be about, you remove a big hurdle of matching right away. That's why most exchanges run on relationship matching.

However, if there are 37 people on a given server, that's something like 2,600 possible combinations of people if you include both romantic and platonic, and that's before you start getting into trios, and that's just way too many tags for the mods to enter manually. So what you do is run a nomination period, and for a week or two weeks you go to all your participants and you go "do you want to sign up for this exchange? Nominate the tags you want to use now! If it doesn't get nominated, it can't be used!" And then people head to the tag set to nominate.

So, on this page, you want "visible tag list" to be selected, because you want people to see what's already been nominated so they don't duplicate, and you want "currently taking nominations" to be selected because you will be taking those nominations instead of doing them all yourself.

So you have to set up limits on those nominations.

The point of taking nominations is to make matching easier, so people normally use the same fandom and relationship limits as they are going to use on the sign-up, to make sure there aren't dozens of tags in the tag set that nobody's using, just cluttering up the space. It also helps stop the issue where someone sees a tag in the tag set, goes "oh man I love that ship" and signs up, but its an extra tag that no one intended to offer, so they don't match to anyone. That's why sometimes people keep the amount of tags that can be nominated low, I've seen people limit this to 10 tags, or even 7, so that's up to you.

And you save, and now when you link your participants the tag set, they will have a "nominate" button.

They will hurry over to press that button, and then they will see a page that looks like this.

This is a thing where you absolutely want to give your participants detailed instructions, because what Ao3 will try to do is auto-fill people's nominations with canonical tags. WE DO NOT WANT CANONICAL TAGS. CANONICAL TAGS ARE THE ENEMY OF EXCHANGES. CANONICAL TAGS ARE THE ENEMY OF MCYT EXCHANGES IN PARTICULAR.

Remember back when we clicked the button that says tags have to be unique? The canonical tag for Philza & Technoblade doesn't have a server on it, and people might want to be requesting that relationship for SMPEarth, Dream SMP, Origins SMP, or arguably even QSMP. If you only have the canonical tag, people can only request a specific dynamic once, for one server. And that is a problem for every situation where people interacted on multiple servers, and with the network of overlaps that is Empires/SOS/3rd Life/Hermitcraft and DSMP/Origins/SMPEarth/QSMP, that's going to lead to unhappy participants. So you tell people to nominate the ship and also "disambiguate" it, and add the server in parentheses. And then all your participants will hit the button to submit, and you will go into the "review nominations" button, and you will let those tags into the tag set.

Now I just distributed the tag set to a couple friends, so let's look at what this looks like behind the scenes.

Brace yourself, it's gonna be wild, but I believe we can get through it.

Now here is a perfectly standard look at tag set nominations after a few people have gotten into the tag set. This is why they pay tag mods the big bucks.

As you can see, there are a few things to be gathered. The first things is a bunch of people used the canon tags (because that's what Ao3 tries to get them to do), someone else nominated an x-reader ship, we have one tag there twice (spelled differently), and the tags are Piped (they have both the person's tax name and the username). (You can let tags in that are Piped, but I find that it makes the tag set harder to read, and usually exchanges are character-focused unless you're writing video blogging rpf anyways, so I ask people to submit tags unpiped, using usernames.) And for the tags that were nominated in a way that I want (unpiped, and disambiguated so they're unique), Ao3 is trying to get me to use the canon tag. But I don't want the canon tag, I want a unique tag, with the server on it, with no pipes. So.

So were I moderating the tag set, after a few minutes it would look like this.

That's going through and disambiguating the tags (adding the server, which I could tell because of the fandom it was nominated under), removing the piping and using the usernames instead of tax names, and then re-ordering the names so they're alphabetical so people can find them on the list later, rejecting the x-reader tag, rejecting the duplicate and allowing the one that's spelled correctly through. Amazing. I have tags that I want to use (I did some other tags that were ready to go in other fandoms as well). I hit submit. Am I ready to go?

No, because tag sets are the most complicated part of exchanges.

I open up my tag set, and if I scroll down to "Unassociated characters and relationships" there are a bunch of tags that are are lost, Ao3 doesn't know where to put them. This is because we very carefully made unique tags that have not been wrangled anywhere, and Ao3 said "i don't know where these go" and shoved them all together in a garbage bin at the bottom of the page. So we have to manually go in to associate them to the right fandoms.

You hit the Edit button on the tag set, and scroll down to the bottom, to "tag associations", and start selecting where tags go.

Honestly this is a great time to be listening to a stream or a podcast or something, and then you have the tag set open in another tab so you know what all the unassociated tags are, and you just go down the list like a databasing machine. It is not hard, cause you disambiguated each tag with its own server, it's just time consuming. Note. This is why people go in and accept tags regularly during the nomination period, because if you do this all at the end you've got a BIG job ahead of you.

So, you turned on your VOD playlist and you associated all your tags, and all the tags are where they are supposed to go. You have a beautiful tag set.

But wait, you say, looking at this beautiful tag set. Some of those tags look at little different. What is the "Dream smp and only dream smp" that a couple of them have?

Well.

You see.

Ao3 designed tag sets to work a certain way, and nobody uses them that way. It turns out that "Quackity/Wilbur Soot (Dream SMP)" is a wrangled canon tag, and the system goes "ah, I know where this goes, this is a sub-tag of the major tag, and the top-level tag is Video Blogging RPF, so it goes under Video Blogging RPF, as all MCYT tags do. I am very smart. I have stuck this Dream SMP tag under Video Blogging RPF. I am a good machine". And then you go AUUUUUUUUGH, and then you turn up the podcast a little louder, and then you sit down and you delete the old tag and you write out a new tag that the system doesn't know what to do with, and it goes uhhhhhhh and sticks it in "unassociated tags" and then you go in again and you manually associate it into the right server.

It's not hard, it's just time consuming. Shouting at the tag set like STOP TELLING ME WHAT TO DO as it helpfully tries to stick dsmp tags in SMPearth and you wrestle it out of SMPEarth and into the right fandom bucket.

Deep breath moment. Honestly that's the most fiddly part of a fiddly process, so if you can get through this you're absolutely golden.

Anyways. You got clean disambiguated unique tags, and then you associated them in the right spot, and then you found the ones that got sorted to the wrong spot and you associated them yourself, and now you have a beautiful tag set ready to go. It's a thing of beauty. Shed a tear. Your participants can select from anything in this tag set, and you know they want to use these specific relationships, because they submitted them to you. What next?

THE MATCHING

Okay. You have your tag set set up and it's accepting nominations. Your participants are filling it out right now. You go back to your collection. it's time to tell it how to match.

This is the "minimum number to match" pane, and this is the minimum numbers to make a successful match. You want 1 for Fandom, and 1 for Relationship, and that's it. People will show up to the machine as a viable match as long as they have submitted a fandom and relationship that matches someone else's offered fandom and relationship.

This is a minimum viable exchange. You're ready to go. As soon as your tag set is done (or immediately if you're not using a tag set), you're ready to go back and open your exchange to sign-ups.

Congratulations!

FURTHER TWEAKING

HOWEVER. There is more that you can do. For example, do you want to allow people to request or opt into NSFW? There's an easy way to do that! First thing is you go back to your tag set, and you scroll down to the "ratings" section that you've been ignoring.

You select G and E, and that way, if people are opting into explicit that means they're okay with NSFW, and if they only select G, that means they only want a non-explicit piece.

Then on the collection you switch the requests and offers sections to include a place to specify a rating.

You want them to definitely specify at least one, and if you maximum allowed is 2, people can opt into both and say "i'm good with whatever"!

Then you scroll down to the matching section, and you tweak that to make sure that people will match on Fandom, Relationship, and at least one Rating.

Bingo. You now have a toggle to turn NSFW on and off.

But a lot of people like to match by TYPE of gift too, specifying if they want art or fic or playlist or web weave etc. How do you do that? Ah, at this point you are master of all you survey, and you can make tag sets do absolutely anything you want. You go back to the tag set and you scroll down to "characters".

Now we were matching on relationships, so the character box is unused. And it lets you put in your own tags. So what you do is you start to add in custom tags.

And then you go back to the Collection settings, and on the requests and the offers you go in to the "characters" section and you say "must select at least one, can select up to six".

And then, you guessed it— you go back to "minimum number to match" and you set that "characters" tab to 1 minimum, 6 maximum. Now people who specified that they wanted Art can be matchable to artists who Offered Art. You have unlimited power, the world is at your fingertips.

There's even more customization that you can do, too! There's "additional tags", which is entirely custom tags you add yourself, that can be anything from specifying if people want fluff or horror or hurt/comfort etc— with the recursive exchange we used it to specify the works people were recursing— I'm considering using it for holidays with the holiday exchange. You can let people opt in or out of major archive warnings by selecting "archive warnings" as a thing that's in the tag set and that you're matching for. Once you understand how the underpinnings of how the machine works, you can wrestle it into almost any shape you want.

So. Whew. That's how exchanges work, under the hood. When I say that this is significantly easier than hand matching the holiday exchange, I ask you to picture just how complicated hand matching gets. Go forth! Thrive! Set up exchanges if you want! The world is your oyster!

Feel free to message me if you have further questions.

[sysmedsaresexist]

I spoke with Colin Ross again.

The original post, for those who missed it.

This is going to be really disjointed and rough. I've been put in a really weird position and I want to just... talk about it. This is okay to reblog, I'm sure there's pro/endos that have been waiting for this. Unfortunately, it's going to be attached to a vent.

Sadly, talking to him brought up a lot of bad feelings. I'm still so sad to see so many people turn on me. I'm disappointed that there was so much pushback. I'm disgusted by people's hypocrisy.

People wanted to know why I wasn't posting my side of the emails to Colin Ross, they tried to say he didn't believe those things anymore.

So I emailed him again, recapping our previous conversations, and asking him if he still believed in non traumagenic plurality.

And he responded that he does.

I thought I could post it, and that would be the end of it. Proving we had spoken before, confirming the topics discussed. But in my email to him, I shared what I've been doing since I last spoke with him, what prompted me to reach out to him again. The same thing that stopped me from posting my side of the emails originally. I wasn't entirely honest with him, either. I don't think I would have gotten a response if I had talked about tumblr.

And I'm simultaneously so excited and so scared.

This is a man that, in a very vague sense, formed a mentor/professional relationship with me. Our interaction overall was brief, but it was exciting to discuss his work with him, ask him questions that had been bothering me-- I told him about myself, my educational and work background. I used my real email and name. My real school. He's Canadian, we talked about it. I shared real details of my life, and while it wasn't necessarily in confidence, I don't think he would appreciate knowing that I've shared his personal thoughts and emails on tumblr, of all places. I'm not lying or hiding anything in my side of the conversation.

I'm scared.

I'm terrified to post anything that could be linked to me. Even posting this, I'm like, "can people like... reverse edit my picture and get my email?" I genuinely don't know.

I worry about posting the full screenshots with his email, knowing people won't believe me if I don't, but not wanting to have these ridiculously immature people in his inbox. I have encouraged people since day one to find his email themselves and reach out. I figure that the only people who would put in that work are the people who genuinely want to learn.

But then I realized that there are people that could ruin the relationship I made with him.

People that could make it so that I can never contact him in this way again.

People could use this to find me, if they get Colin Ross talking. (The rational part of my brain says he's smart enough not to give someone else my name, but goddamn, some of you people are actually dangerous)

There are people that want to do that to me. People that hate that I even brought a professional into this conversation. And I get it. I sat on the original conversation for almost three years, remember?

It's really scary to admit you're wrong, that you've been close-minded and hardheaded. It's scary to confront your bias and actions.

But having him respond to me... I feel so lucky? Not that Colin Ross is a saint, but how often do you get to meet someone like him? How often do you have a chance to take advantage of a professional contact that seems willing and happy to have these kinds of conversations with you? Three years later and he remembered me. He took the time to answer me, again.

I don't want to fuck that up.

So I thought about reaching out to certain people, showing them the entire set of emails without any blockout and having them vouch for the authenticity.

Then I realized that I wouldn't trust any of you anti endogenic systems with any of my information after how you've all behaved.

And I realized that none of you are going to change your minds, no matter what I show you, and I'd rather to maintain my professional relationships than put any more effort into any of you.

And I know if I wait too long to post this, people will call it fake, so I either need to go ahead and make this post or just kind of let it disappear into obscurity.

It's so important, though.

Isn't it?

I can't tell anymore.

[gentlebeardsbarngrill]

04/03/2024 Daily OFMD Recap

TLDR; Rhys; Nathan; Rachel; David; Samba/BTS; Vote for OFMD on GLAAD; Watch Parties; Watch Party Polls; Pirate Experts; Uncle Ed; Fan Spotlight; Love Notes; Daily Darby/Tonight's Taika

= Rhys Darby =

Looks like Rhys is taking a page from Taika's book and doing some advertising this week!

Src: Rhys' IG, Rosie's IG

= Nathan Foad =

Love's Labor Lost

Nathan will be playing Costard in Love's Labor Lost! ROYAL SHAKESPEARE THEATRE STRATFORD-UPON-AVON11 APR - 18 MAY 2024 More info!

= Rachel House =

Rachel's new movie The Mountain has been selected for the Sydney Film Festival 2024!

Src: Rachel's IG

= David Jenkins =

Chaos Dad saying what we're all thinking.

Src: David Jenkins' IG

= Samba Schutte =

More BTS from Samba! This time improvising from the Revenge crews!

Tumblr Link to the Vid / Src: Samba's IG

== Vote for OFMD on GLADD! ==

Hey crew! GLAAD is opening up Fan Favorites for their May 11th ceremony! Let's see if we can't get OFMD one of those awards! Requires an email, and it's not in the inital dropdown, you'll need to add Other.

Please Vote! Img Src: Irene Adler's IG

== Active Watch Parties ==

Taskmaster NZ Series 1 Watch Party with @saveofmdcrewmates! When: April 3-12 (W,F, Su -2 eps each) Time: 11 am PT/ 2pm ET/ 7pm BST Where to watch: YouTube, TVNZ, Channel 4

Twitter Hashtags:

#Quartermaster

#OurFlagMeansDeath

#Taskmaster

== Poll Going on for Watch Parties ==

Twitter Poll going on by @iamadequate1 regarding two questions:

Should WP start times be the same for Europe and the US?

Is it useful for each WP to have its own separate hashtag?

Please vote when you get a chance if you use twitter. Full Thread

== Pirate Experts ==

== Uncle Ed ==

Some of you may have been seeing the theme of "uncle edward" going around and if you're wondering what it is-- well look no further! @eddiepeaches had a really great post (which is where it originated), please check it out!

== Fan Spotlight ==

= Cast Cards =

Tonight's Cast Card is Abshir! Good to see Devon Stewart getting some love! Thank you @melvisik!

= Big Gay Energy Podcast =

This weeks episode features an interview with Vico Ortiz!

Where to Watch: Big Gay Energy Youtube

Where to Listen: BGEPod

Big Gay Podcast Patreon!

== Love Notes ==

Evening/Morning m'dears. Hopefully today was a bit easier! We got quite a few crumbs of bts / script info today and lots and lots of Rhys which certainly raised some people's spirits.

I just wanted to send a reminder out today that lovelies, you are so much more than what others think of you. You are so much more than what you think of yourself even most days. You are such an inspiration, and you've been doing a really amazing job, even if you've had bad days. I'm sure you're tired of hearing that, but that's too bad because I'm gonna keep saying it until you get it in your beautiful brain that you are doing great. So many things are going on, and everyday, bad or good, you are getting through them. If someone was unkind to you today, I'm so sorry, and I hope they haven't made you feel too down on yourself. If they did, just know, you are a force to be reckoned with. They can be spiteful and hateful, but you are a wonderful force that keeps on kicking ass.

You deserve kindness in this world, no matter what, you hear me?

No matter what.

You're doing great, so give yourself a big ol hug for me and the rest of the crew, and know you are an absolute gem. <3 You're gonna get there, wherever you're trying to go. Keep going!

Love Notes Image Src: @ BethEvans IG.

== Daily Darby / Tonight's Taika ==

Don't ask me what theme this is 👀

Taika Gif Courtesy of @darkinerry Darby Gif Courtesy of @wastingyourgum

[kyuushi]

This post is long overdue but I figured better late than never!

There's a way to read Kyuushi in Japanese online and for free legally, something that was previously only possible during limited-time events. You can't immediately gain access to all 323 chapters so don't get too excited but it's still pretty cool. There's a (long) guide on how the site works below the cut!

A few months ago, Akita Shoten, the publisher of Weekly Shonen Champion, the magazine Kyuushi runs in, launched their Champion Cross site. This site allows users to read manga for FREE, legally!

To participate, you can make an account here. You're able to connect a Google or Twitter account, so it's quite easy. If you do use a Google account like I did, the site just asks for a username (it has to be unique, if someone is already using it, you'll have to pick something else) your gender (prefer not to say, male, female, or neither), and year of birth.

Then you just lie about reading the privacy policy by checking the box at the bottom and you're good to go!

If you don't want to connect an existing account, you'll need to supply your email and a password as you normally do when signing up for a new site.

Of course, as with most free things, there is a catch... or kind of several catches 😂 You must collect tickets (すぐ無料チケット) to unlock most chapters.

You get some for signing up, completing "missions," and using your daily free gacha attempt. The gacha can only give you 0, 1, or 2 tickets. If you want to retry the gacha, you can earn another chance by sharing your result to Twitter...

aka you just let it open the new tab but don't actually hit the tweet button lol. Just keep in mind that the second number you get overwrites the first.

You can then head on over to Kyuushi's page (remember to hit the star ⭐ to add it to your favorites!) and pick which chapters you'd like to unlock using your tickets, 1 ticket per chapter. You also unlock the ability to read 1 chapter every 23 hours (the 待つと無料/wait and it's free option). When I made a new account I was immediately able to use this free chapter read!

The first time I used a ticket to unlock ("rent") a chapter, I got a popup asking me to confirm my email address. Not sure if this will happen to everyone or just those who used a Google or Twitter account to sign up.

If this does happen, you'll just get an email with a link to click that verifies your account.

When you use a ticket to rent a chapter, the chapter becomes available to you for 15 days.

However, after reading a chapter with your daily free 待つと無料 option, you have only 3 days to go back and read before it gets locked again. The remaining time is shown to the right in gray. (Please admire Bikimi-chan's beauty in the chapter 317 preview.)

Remember to give the chapters a like!

It's important to note that tickets DO EXPIRE. You can check your ticket information by clicking the number as shown here.

Tickets from different sources have different expiration dates. Daily gacha tickets expire within the day (the expiry date & time is shown in red).

On the other hand, mission tickets last longer.

This section at the top of the page shows you the soonest upcoming expiry date:

At least per my testing, the site does seem to automatically use the tickets that expire earliest!

As of right now, there are 2 chapters that can only be read by using coins, which are a paid currency.

I'm afraid I won't be testing coins out... I've already bought Kyuushi volumes as ebooks, and I'm not a fan of how you seem to have to enter your card information directly into the site. Guess they don't accept PayPal or similar services? I'm not even sure if they'd accept foreign cards. If anyone has tried/tries this out, please let me know!

So basically, you can technically read all but 2 chapters of Kyuushi for free, but it does take time to gather tickets or simply wait to read a chapter per day, and you don't get permanent access to the chapters. It's not the most convenient or reliable resource but it's a legal way to support the series. During this extended hiatus, I think it's important to continue showing that Kyuushi has an active fanbase eager for more vampire fun! 🦇

Please feel free to reach out if you have any questions about the site. I did my best to test out the features and explain how they work but this was a whole lot of information to just dump on people so I'll understand if there's still some confusion. I also could have gotten something wrong so do let me know if you notice any issues.

[unfoxmeart]

This was fun last year, so I'm giving it another go this year as well! These slots support me, a queer artist, directly- come make cool angels with me.

Like last year, these are flat priced at 20$ USD, and as usual payment through paypal only. Payment is due upfront, and is non-refundable. Angels will be done in the order received, I will post a link to a trello board for transparency, allowing you to check where you’re at in the queue. These are limited designs, meaning that I won't be offering drafts, revisions, or designs more complex than what the form allows*. Slots are unlimited between the listed dates above. If you're interested, dm or email me with the info below:

Number of wings (limit of 4, odd # of wings is fine!)

one word inspo for me to base the angel around, like a theme, an object, animal, etc (ex: teeth, fire, sorrow, cat). Not sure if yours counts? Just ask, I'm happy to let you know if it fits.

A pride flag, which is where the colour palette for the angel will come from. Additional flags are 5$ a flag. 

As some flags have different versions, if there is a specific one you want, let me know! Providing a pic of the flag or a link is always welcome, as well.

Your paypal so I can send the invoice, and an email where I can send the finished piece. 

Whether you want to be tagged in the posted piece, or be kept anonymous.

My email is unfoxmeart@gmail.com in case you'd prefer to communicate there, or you can dm me here. Thanks!

*I am happy to revisit these designs in a regular commission slot, in the future, if you want to expand on or revise them. For times sake, I would wait to take on those until after the sale has ended.

[taomyou]

The Paradis Marriage Pact

Author: taomyou Pairing: Levi Ackerman x Reader Summary: Do you believe in soulmates? No. Do you believe that Jean's coding project can introduce you to someone special? Not really, but your mind can be changed. Word Count: 6.1k Tags: modern au, university au, strangers to lovers, fluff, meet-cute, matchmaking, one-shot

The Paradis Marriage Pact

"Hey, do you think Levi believes in soulmates?" Hange asks, looking up from their laptop at Erwin. The two friends are in a study lounge reviewing for midterms, but it seems that Hange's taking a break since they're asking weird questions.

"I'm not sure. Why do you ask?"

To that, Hange angles their screen towards Erwin so he can see what they're looking at. The website they're on looks simple enough: it seems just like any other standard testing site. "This second-year in my biotech lecture sent out the link to everyone! It's a matchmaking form for students here!"

Looking closer at the screen, he sees "PARADIS MARRIAGE PACT" in big, bold letters at the top of the page. What's this got to do with whether or not Levi believes in soulmates?

"You didn't answer my question, Hange. What are you planning?"

Hange dramatically leans back into the sofa, arms crossed and a sinister grin on their face. "I'm filling this out on our dear friend's behalf!"

"And does our dear friend know about this?"

"Of course not!" Hange laughs, "he'd skin me alive if he knew!"

"Well, you're right about that," says Erwin.

Hange nods at him before moving back to their earlier position closer to the table in front of them. "Wanna help me fill it out?"

With a laugh, Erwin shakes his head but starts putting away his own laptop and books. Once his bag is zipped, he scoots over to sit closer to Hange. "Sure, why not?"

"Really? I'll text Levi and ask about the whole soulmates thing, but we can just skip that for now!"

♡

"I don't wanna take it!"

"You can't not take it! The rest of us just did it!"

"Yeah, Connie's right," Sasha says, poking at your shoulder.

You groan and swat her hand away.

You and your friends have spent the last several hours in one of the library study rooms. Connie organized it as a "group study session," but you're sure you and Jean are the only ones actually being productive. You're not sure about Connie since you can't see his screen from where you're sitting, but Sasha's spent this entire time playing Overcooked! 2 in multiplayer mode with who you assume is him. Then, about 30 minutes ago, Connie started complaining about his engineering midterm, which prompted Sasha to complain about her physics midterm, which then prompted Jean to talk about his semester-long coding project.

"Could you guys fill this out? I need at least a thousand participants by the end of next week to get an A on this, and I already sent it to everyone I could," Jean asked, forwarding the link to the group chat.

You click on it and are brought to the website.

PARADIS MARRIAGE PACT: Fall in love today!

Leave it to Jean to choose to make a matchmaking website for his final project. Sasha and Connie found the premise to be quite fun, whereas you rolled your eyes at the page.

"Love calculators already exist," you criticized, exiting out of the tab immediately. Jean flipped you off from across the table, not appreciating your comment.

Which brings you to now, where Connie, Sasha, and Jean have been trying to pressure you into filling out the Paradis Marriage Pact. You don't really get why they want you specifically to do it, since you know Jean's popular and he could probably get enough responses, but it's probably more about annoying you than it is them actually wanting you to find the love of your life.

"If you need responses so bad, I can use my extra emails to spam random answers," you offer.

Jean shakes his head, tutting loudly. "You have to input your school email. Besides, if those answers paired you with someone who made the Pact honestly, they'd be heartbroken."

"So? Serves them right for taking some random sophomore's mandatory coding project seriously."

Connie and Sasha burst into laughter, which earns them a glare from Jean. You sigh dramatically and rest your head on your hand.

"Don't be mean! I put a lot of effort into this project!"

You never doubted that he did, him being a CS major, but it was still entertaining to poke fun at him.

"I have an idea! Why don't we fill it out for her?" Sasha suggests, and you see her open the link to start typing in your name. You immediately perk up and try to get her to stop, but she hurriedly picks up her laptop and rushes over to the other side of the table where Jean and Connie huddle closer to her. "Do either of you know her school email?"

"She forwarded me something a while ago, I can check," Connie says, opening his own laptop to find your information.

It's then that you know that you can either do it yourself or let these fools try to guess how you'd answer, and one of those possibilities is infinitely worse than the other.

"Okay, fine! I'll do it!"

All of them smile and immediately get up to crowd you, the sound of their rolling chairs filling the room as they push them to your side of the table. Sasha offers her laptop to you, and you place it on top of one of your textbooks. You type in your school email and some other information, and then you're brought to your first prompt.

It's okay that my partner drinks.

□ Agree □ Disagree

You check off the box for 'agree' and move on. The next couple of questions are easy enough, just asking what activities you're okay with, but your friends are still watching you intensely, and it unnerves you slightly.

After confirming that you are, in fact, not okay with your partner doing hard drugs, you're faced with the next question.

Do you believe in soulmates?

□ Yes □ No

You click on 'no,' but before you're able to tap the button to move on, Jean speaks up.

"What do you mean, 'no?'"

You turn to face him, completely deadpan and unamused. "You made this quiz, why would you even ask if you're gonna get butthurt about people not agreeing with you?"

"It's not about that! You just seem like you'd be into that sort of thing."

You hum, looking back at your screen. "Nah, I think soulmates are kinda stupid."

♡

Midterms came and went, but that "end of next week" deadline came even quicker for Jean. He managed to get the thousand answers he needed for the chance at an A, but he was stressed as all hell up until the very last day when he finally got enough participants. Unfortunately, it didn't get easier for him since he's been stressing about the next part of the assignment, so you, Sasha, and Connie decided to invite him out to dinner to try and help him destress. It's probably not working if all he's doing is complaining about his professor.

"Seriously, what kind of professor requires a thousand participants in that amount of time? This is a lower-division coding class, for fuck's sake, not Advanced Media Advertising!" He complains, taking a long sip of his soda.

"He sounds terrible, but, hey, at least you got enough answers," says Connie.

You and Sasha nod along while Jean takes another sip before speaking again.

"You guys don't get it! He's the actual devil! You guys are so lucky you'll never have to take his class!"

"What's left for you to do, anyway?" You ask.

"There's a report I have to write. I have to prove my project was successful, too, so I gotta find a couple that the program matched."

"And how exactly are you going to do that?"

"The program should've sent everyone an email with their match's name and contact information by now. I just need a couple to reply to it and agree to get interviewed."

"Man, good luck with that, nobody checks their email," Connie winces.

Jean buries his face in his hands, groaning in agony. "I know! That's why I'm still so worried!"

"Couldn't you just lie?" Sasha inquires.

Jean shakes his head. "The professor wants the audio from the interview and a picture of the couple together. It's so fucking stupid, what do either of those things even have to do with the class?" Suddenly, his face brightens, and now he's looking between you, Sasha, and Connie. "Can't one of you guys just go out with your match? Oh, I'm a fucking genius!"

The three of you awkwardly make eye contact with one another, mostly to avoid looking at Jean himself.

"Uh, dude, I don't really think any of us are up for that," Connie says.

"Yeah. Don't get me wrong, the questionnaire was fun to do as, like, a personality quiz, but I'm not down," Sasha adds.

Jean's face falls, and he turns to look at you.

By now, his hands are in a prayer position.

The likelihood of anyone getting back to the email Jean sent is slim-to-none, nevermind the likelihood of a couple replying.

You know how hard he works—the two of you study together practically every other day in the library—and despite his popularity, he's not one to go out often, instead staying in to work on projects or research. He really is adamant about doing well on this project and you know he could somehow make it out with a decent grade, but maybe you could do this tiny favor to help him out. It's not like it'd be all that hard, right? Meeting with your match and getting interviewed doesn't sound like too much of a hassle, especially since you're already close with Jean.

You can't really believe that you're choosing to help him, considering how much of a fight you put up when you were asked to take the Pact in the first place, but whatever. You smile at Jean and give him a thumbs-up.

"Sure, I got you."

Jean practically jumps out of his seat to give you a hug, laughing and smiling brightly. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!"

You give him a firm pat on the back before prying him away from you so he can go back to his seat. "Really, thank you so much! This makes everything so much easier!"

You blush in embarrassment, not really used to affection from Jean, but hey. He looks like a weight's been lifted off his chest, and that's why you're all out tonight anyway. "Yeah, yeah, let me check my email for a name, though."

Jean eagerly nods, a smile still on his face. Sasha and Connie don't look like they have anything to say, but they pay attention to you, probably also excited to know who your match is.

You don't have any sort of hopes for who it could be, not having your eye on anyone anyway, but you just hope they're understanding enough to agree to an interview. You open your mail app and tap on the "Search mail" prompt to type in "Paradis Marriage Pact." There's only one email related to your search, so you click on it to find your match's name in big, dark letters.

"Any of you guys know somebody named Levi Ackerman?"

♡

Somewhere in an empty lecture hall across campus, Hange, Levi, and Erwin are all lazing around after their last class. Levi's laptop is connected to the projector, and he's just scrolling through different streaming sites.

"Why the fuck are we even in here? We can just watch something at home."

"Because, Levi, tuition's too expensive to not make use of the grand halls at our disposal!"

"Imagine not being a scholarship student."

Erwin and Hange laugh, and the latter gets up from their seat to go over to Levi to help him choose something to watch. He refuses them at first, but they just shove him around enough to get him to give up and go sit where they just were. In the middle of some more aimless scrolling, they notice that there's a tab opened to Levi's email.

Hange did overhear someone last week telling that second-year that they got their results back from the Paradis Marriage Pact, so they get the stupid genius idea to try and look through Levi's email for his match. Switching tabs, they type in "Paradis Marriage Pact" into the "Search mail" prompt.

"Oi! What the fuck are you doing?" Levi exclaims.

Hange waves him off, not looking up from the screen. Erwin just has to sit back and watch it all unfold in front of him, the projector magnifying everything that Hange's doing. Finding the unopened email, they click on it and see a name printed in the same font as the initial title for the questionnaire page. Next to the name is a phone number.

Levi still doesn't really understand what Hange's doing, but whatever it is can't be good. He gets up again and rushes for his laptop, disconnecting it from the projector and closing it before Hange can try anything else.

"What do you think you're doing?"

"Nothing!" Hange nervously laughs and looks past Levi's shoulder at Erwin for back up.

Levi follows their eyes over to the man as well. Erwin gets up from his seat, joining the other two at the front of the hall.

"Just forget it, Hange. It was already wrong of us to submit answers for Levi."

"Again, what the fuck are you guys talking about? And what the fuck is the 'Paradis Marriage Pact?' Did you sign me up for a mail-order bride or something?"

Hange extends out both their arms, frantically waving off the accusations and shaking their head. "No, no! This kid in my biotech programed some matchmaking site, so I thought it'd be neat to submit something for you," Hange explains.

Levi exhales deeply, pinching his nose between his fingers. "So you think I need help from a fucking website to find a girlfriend? Just how pathetic do you think I am?"

"You literally have not dated since, like, high school!"

"And? That's a problem how?"

Erwin puts a hand on Levi's shoulder, though it gets swatted away just as quickly. "It isn't, we just thought it'd be fun. We're sorry," Erwin says.

It's certainly frustrating that Hange acts this way, interfering with his personal life, but he knows they mean well (emphasis on "mean.")

Erwin does too, so as much as he hates this, he'll let this one slide. It's a Friday, and the week has been exhausting enough. Erwin and Hange look at one another while Levi reaches into his back pocket to take out his phone. He felt a buzz, so he probably got a text from someone. When he turns on his phone, however, he sees that the notification is a text from a number he doesn't have saved.

Unknown Number - 6:27 PM

is this levi ackerman? this is your match from the paradis marriage pact

He frowns at the text but doesn't say anything. He'll deal with it later.

"Just don't do this again, so help me, God."

Hange's eyes bug out of their head. "You're not mad at us?"

Levi scoffs. "I'm mad, but I'm too tired of your shit to beat you into the ground right now."

"Let's go back home now, yeah?" Erwin suggests, his body facing the door.

After Levi wordlessly puts his laptop in his backpack, the three head back to their shared apartment. Erwin occasionally greets people that recognize him on the walk over, but other than that, they travel in complete silence to avoid pissing off Levi any further.

Once Levi's in his room, he shrugs off his backpack to put near his door and takes out his phone, walking over to the chair he has at his desk. He sits down, turns on his phone, and stares at the message he got.

In the first place, he has no idea what the fuck this Paradis Marriage Pact shit is.

Yeah, sure, Hange described it as a matchmaking program, but it's not like that's much to go off of. He switches over to his mail app to find the email sent from the site.

There still isn't much information—just the match's name, phone number, and a message at the bottom: Please reply to this email if your match is successful and you'd like to be interviewed! He rolls his eyes—the email looks formal enough, but there's no way anyone's going to actually reply to it. He also compares the number that texted him earlier and the number listed on the email.

They match, so he replies to the text.

Levi - 7:33 PM

Yes, this is Levi

Unknown Number - 7:39 PM

sorry if this is weird but i need a favor

Levi - 7:40 PM

Sorry, not interested in dating

Unknown Number - 7:40 PM

me neither

...Doesn't make much sense to text a match from something called a "marriage pact" if you're not interested, but alright. Levi isn't going to question it; he's doing the same thing replying to this person.

Unknown Number - 7:41 PM

could we meet up?

Levi - 7:42 PM

I said I'm not interested You literally just agreed with me

Unknown Number - 7:42 PM

no its not like that!!

Levi - 7:43 PM

Ok, then what's the favor?

Unknown Number - 7:43 PM

my friend is the guy who made the paradis marriage pact program and he needs help getting data from a successful match

Levi - 7:45 PM

And you want me to help because the email asking for it was so pathetic that he needed to get help from someone he knows personally?

Unknown Number - 7:46 PM

exactly! so are you up for it?

Levi - 7:46 PM

No

Unknown Number - 7:47 PM

we'd just have to answer some interview questions together

Levi - 7:47 PM

I said no already

Unknown Number - 7:48 PM

i already told my friend that i'd help him :( please?? i can buy you a drink

Levi - 7:50 PM

Why not just make up the data?

Unknown Number - 7:50 PM

... they need a recorded audio file of the couple talking and a picture

Levi - 7:51 PM

That's an awful lot for just a project

Unknown Number - 7:51 PM

if it means anything, he has dr pixis

Levi frowns.

He had Pixis for Intro to Python in his first year, and it's the only class he's gotten a B in since enrolling at Paradis University. Pixis is notorious for being a harsh grader, but there's only one other professor that offers lower-division technology course requirements for CS majors, so everyone has to take him at some point. It makes sense now that whoever made the Paradis Marriage Pact is scrambling for data. It's stupid that whoever made this decided to reach out for information over email, nevermind over school email, but Levi knows it's too late in the semester to try something else.

Unknown Number - 7:55 PM

ik its asking a lot and i have no idea who you are but if we matched then maybe it wont be so bad

Levi - 7:56 PM

I didn't take it My roommates did it for me and they probably answered it differently than I would've

Unknown Number - 7:57 PM

even better!! we already know we arent a match so theres no expectations

God, she isn't going to stop asking, is she? Levi can't judge their dedication to the cause, though; it's admirable that she's willing to reach out to a complete stranger just to help her friend.

Levi - 7:57 PM

If we aren't a real match, doesn't that make your friend's project a failure?

Unknown Number - 7:58 PM

technically, that isn't his fault

Levi - 8:00 PM

You're not giving up, are you?

Unknown Number - 8:01 PM

i will if you say no again

Great, she's a good friend, and she's respectful.

Levi himself can't believe that he's seriously about to go along with this.

For all he knows, this girl could be a fucking axe-murderer, but, at the same time, he knows how fucking miserable it is to have Pixis for any class ever. She can't be that bad if she hasn't prodded him for any actual information, and she sincerely seems to not be interested in getting to know him.

Just an interview, some pictures, and he'd never have to cross paths with her again?

Yeah, he can do that.

Levi - 8:03 PM

Okay, but you're still buying me a drink

Unknown Number - 8:04 PM

deal!! thank you so much!! let me ask my friend when we can do the interview

♡

"What do you mean you can't come? You're literally supposed to interview us in," you pull your phone away from your ear to check the time, 1:55 PM, "5 minutes!"

"I'm so sorry! I forgot I had a midterm today, and I can't get to you guys and make it back in time!" Jean says.

You groan and change the hand your phone is in. "What the fuck, man, midterm season was over, like, a month ago."

"I know! But Shadis kept pushing it back because people kept asking for more time to study!"

"So what do you want me to do? He already didn't want to do this, and I don't want to inconvenience him even more by changing the date this late."

"I can text you the questions, and you can go through them together."

"What about the audio file?"

"Just record it on your phone, and I'll edit in my voice so it sounds like I'm actually there."

You roll your eyes. "Are you sure that's a good idea?"

"I don't really have a choice."

"Well, you're right about that. Let's just hope this Levi guy is okay with this."

"Okay with what, exactly?"

Looking towards the voice, you see a raven-haired guy around your age dressed in a neat black shirt and dark jeans. Before this, you texted each other the details of your outfits so you could find each other in the café Jean picked out for the three of you to meet, so you know that it's Levi. He seems to have a frown on his face, but you just hope that it's not directed towards you.

Despite that, though, he's.. really attractive.

You try not to dwell on that as you motion him to sit in the booth with you. He does so wordlessly and takes out his own phone to busy himself.

"I'll owe you forever, okay?"

You sigh, putting your elbow on the table. "Damn right you will. I get it, though. I'll try to make it work." You can hear him sigh in relief on the other end of the line.

"Thank you! I gotta go now, but send me the audio after! Don't forget the picture too!"

"It's no problem, Jean. Good luck on your midterm, you got this," you say, then bringing your phone away from your ear to end the call.

Levi clears his throat from across you to get your attention. "Is your friend on the way?" he asks.

You nervously laugh. "Yeah.. so about him, he can't make it."

"Is he who you were just on the phone with?"

You nod, looking away from him. "He called me and said he has a midterm today," you say.

He nods in what you want to interpret as understanding, but he's probably just confused. "Bit late for midterms, no?"

You nod, anxiously laughing again. "I told him the same thing, but he said his professor pushed it back."

"Pushing back a test that far sounds like a fucking terrible idea, but okay."

You hear a buzz come from your phone, so you pick it up to see a text from Jean. Opening it, you see that it's the questions Jean's supposed to be asking you and Levi. You put your phone back on the table and slide it over to Levi to look at.

"He sent me the questions, if you wanted to look at them."

"Just send them to me," he says, ignoring your device. You nod and take your phone back, quickly copying the text and forwarding it to Levi. "I assume we're still going to do this without him?"

You smile sheepishly at him, bringing your hands together in front of your face. "If it's okay with you. I understand if it isn't, but let me at least pay for you to get a drink before you leave. I've bothered you enough asking you to come here in the first place."

He looks up at you for a second before looking back at his phone to skim the questions.

"I don't care."

Tough crowd, huh.

Before you start, a waitress comes to your table asking what you and Levi would like to drink. You tell her you'll have a grapefruit green tea while Levi orders a cup of black tea.

"I'm gonna record the audio on my phone, and then we'll take turns answering, yeah? Jean said he'd edit in his own voice." He hums in understanding, and so you go to open your voice-recorder app and tap the "record" icon before placing your phone between the two of you. "I can answer first, since you have the questions."

He sighs.

"'What's your name?'"

You answer, and he does the same. Easy enough to start.

"'What's your major?'"

"I'm a public health major. You?"

"I'm in CS," he replies. "'How did you find out about the Paradis Marriage Pact?'"

"You forced me to take it," you say, voice wavering as you're unsure if you're supposed to pretend Jean is there or not. Levi looks up at you, his frown now replaced with a neutral expression.

"Are we going to pretend your friend is here?" He asks.

You groan and put your head down. "You're right, it's probably stupid."

He shakes his head. "No, it isn't. It'll help trick Pixis into thinking he's actually here."

You bring your head up and nod slowly, bobbing your head.

For someone who said he didn't care, he sure is nice. Well, as nice as you can be to a complete stranger.

The waitress comes back with your drinks, and you both thank her. 

Levi glances back down at his phone. "'Did you know each other before the Paradis Marriage Pact?'"

"You didn't answer the last question."

Levi rolls his eyes. "I mentioned it to you before. My roommates took it for me, so I didn't even know what this thing was until one of them brought it up to me."

After reaching for your cup to take a sip, you speak up.

"Well, we gotta make something up. You could say they showed it to you, and you decided to take it," you reason. He sighs.

"Okay, then. My roommate showed it to me, and I thought it was worth taking," he says, taking a sip of his own drink. "This is good."

Having never been at this café before, you can't agree or disagree, so you just smile. You notice that he's holding his cup by the rim, which is a bit odd, but it feels fitting for him.

"And no, we didn't know each other before this. It's kind of late now, but it's nice to meet you. Thank you for agreeing to come."

"It's nice to meet you, too."

The two of you continue like this: answering questions, slowly making your way down the list. They're all pretty general—just asking about things like what careers you're aiming for and what hobbies you have. You find out that he's interested in tea tasting, and he finds out that you're interested in gardening. Quite a bit of time passes, and soon enough, it feels like you're just having a conversation with a friend and not recording an interview.

You notice that he hasn't taken a drink in a while, so you speak up to ask him about it.

"Are you out of tea?" You ask.

He nods, scrolling down to the next question. Looking around for the waitress, you call her over to your table.

"What can I help you with?" She asks.

"Could we get two more cups of black tea, please?" At the mention of the drink, Levi looks up at you and the waitress.

"Of course! Let me get that for you," and with that, she's headed off for the drink bar.

"You didn't have to get more, you know." Levi says. "Why'd you get two cups?"

You smile, bringing your cup back up to finish the last of your grapefruit tea. "If you like it, it's probably worth trying. You said you try teas a lot, so I trust that it's good." He rolls his eyes, but you can see the corner of his mouth twitch upwards into a sort of half smile. "Anyway, next question?"

"'Are you happy with your match?'"

"Well, since Jean's supposed to be interviewing a successful match, I'll go along with that. You've been good company too, so yes, I'm happy with my match."

"I feel the same, then." You're glad he goes along with your answer, so you smile over at him. "'Why do you think you were paired together?'" He reads.

"Could you answer this one first? I don't really know how we could lie about this one."

He hums, looking up at you again. "I don't know what kind of questions were on the Pact, but from our conversation so far, you seem like a good person."

You're taken off guard, so you avoid his gaze, looking down at your empty teacup. "You think so?" You can feel your ears start to get red, so you feign fixing your hair to try and cover them. You didn't expect any answer like that from him even with all the talking you've been doing, so you're flustered.

"You didn't know who I was, and you went this far to help your friend with his project. Even after I told you I'm not actually your match, you still wanted to get the data for him. I think most people in your situation would've let him figure it out on his own." 

You laugh good-naturedly, putting your hands in your lap. You look up to see him still focused on you, and the blush on your face feels a little hotter.

You want to thank him and try to answer Jean's question, but before you can say anything, the waitress comes back with two new cups of black tea and takes away yours and Levi's empty cups. The two of you reach for the cups set in front of you, and you take a sip together.

"You're right, this is good," you say. He nods in agreement, and the two of you put your cups down.

"Alright, this is the last question. 'Both of you selected 'no' when asked if you believed in soulmates. Why do you believe that?'" Levi recites from Jean's questions. He pauses, a new frown forming on his face. "One of my roommates texted me to ask this a while ago. No wonder."

You laugh at that, covering your smile with your hand. "At least we don't have to come up with another lie."

He nods. "Yeah."

"Well, there's not really much to say. I think the idea that there's only one person destined to love you is pretty limiting, and then the chances of meeting them would be slim-to-none," you answer. You see Levi nod from the corner of your eye, so you continue. "Falling in love with them would be even harder. It's not really worth believing in soulmates, in my opinion."

"I feel the same way, more or less," he adds. "The idea is there, though."

"Yeah, it'd be nice if there was a way to know someone's perfect for you. Ever heard of the Paradis Marriage Pact? I've heard it's worked wonders," you joke.

He looks pretty unamused, though.

"Yeah, sure. It's so successful that the person who made it has to ask his friend to pretend they've found the love of their life," Levi says.

You laugh, nearly spitting out your tea. "Well, at least we agree that soulmates aren't real! Besides, anyone can fall in love if you spend enough time together."

"I suppose you're right."

Levi did say that the question about soulmates was the last one, so you get your phone from the middle of the table and tap the "stop recording" icon. The two of you don't initiate any further conversation, so you both sit in silence and finish your teas.

The quiet isn't awkward. It's... nice.

You flag the waitress over when you're finished, and after you pay for everything, she asks if you need anything else.

"Actually, could you take our picture for us?" You ask.

She nods, taking your phone from you to snap a quick picture. You smile, and you thank her as she hands the device back to you.

"You guys are so cute!" She coos, waving goodbye to you both. You and Levi both make eye contact, but neither of you say anything.

You check the time on your phone: 3:45 PM. You have a class at 4, so you get up from your seat to start heading over. You look down at Levi who's still sitting and wave goodbye to him.

"It really was nice meeting you, Levi. Really, thank you for agreeing to get interviewed, even if my friend couldn't make it. I hope it wasn't awkward for you."

"It wasn't."

You smile at him, tucking a piece of hair behind your still-red ear.

"Well, that's a relief," you say. You turn to leave the café, but before you can take any steps, you hear Levi clear his throat. You look at him, but he doesn't meet your gaze.

"Did you mean it when you said you were happy we matched, or did you only say that because of your friend?" He asks, looking down at his cup. You see a bit of red at the tops of his ears, so you giggle. "What's so funny?"

Even though he can't see it, you smile at him before answering, ignoring the latter question.

"I think I meant it."

You walk away before you can see his face, but you feel a buzz from your phone as soon as you're out the door. When you look at it, your smile gets even bigger.

Levi - 3:50 PM

I think I meant it too

♡

Jean yawns, stretching his arms above his head. He's finally back home for winter break, the semester having ended a week or so ago.

Despite that, though, Pixis hasn't released his grade yet, and he's getting worried.

Did Pixis somehow figure out that he messed with the audio file? Jean swears he did everything else perfectly, so it's gotta be that if he hasn't gotten his score back. As far as he knew, everyone else in the class got theirs back already. He's been sweating it all winter break.

For the hundredth time that night, Jean goes to refresh his school email. In addition to an email from the university's gradebook, however, there's an email from Dr. Pixis himself.

"Dear lord, please let this be good." He takes a deep breath before opening it. Realizing what it says, he screams out in joy. "Holy shit!"

"Jean-boy, what's the matter?" His mom asks, opening his door to see what all the noise is about. He excitedly motions her over to his desk, a big, bright smile on his face.

"Mom, look!"

Hello Jean, I am very pleased with your project. What an inventive idea—a program to match up students. Easy A. Thank you for not turning in the same boring project as everyone else. This may be a bit out of the blue, but I would also like to extend you a position as one of my TAs for next year's fall semester. You have proven yourself to be highly proficient in the course material. Attached to this email is the paperwork to formally accept. I hope you consider it. Also, good job finding a couple to interview. I seriously doubted that you could when you sent in your first round of data. Actually, I saw them the other day at the ice skating rink downtown holding hands. They look cute together, makes me believe in love again. Consider launching a similar program for professors, will you? I look forward to hearing from you. Best, Professor Dot Pixis.

[konigsblog]

yandere price headcannons x gn!reader

hi guys this part 2 to part 1 for yandere headcannons. please comment requests cause my email won't link to my account smh

john "price"

sfw

i can imagine that price would be a relaxed and slightly possession yandere.

blowing his cigars in your face or mouth. it always makes him laugh at your cute face!

the first time you did manage to escape he would worryingly relaxed, asking you to understand he wants best for you.

definitely uses, "sweetheart" "doll" "darling" "babygirl"

on days where you refused to listen or really would stop bothering him, he would burn your skin using his cigars. a smirk growing on that stupid face as he saw you flinch and wince.

the first few days you were constantly supervised. your wrists tied with rope, making you cringe at the rope burn.

don't think about escaping though, he has hidden trackers on your phone and everywhere. he wouldn't mind taking you out in public because he would do the speaking and if you ever opened your mouth to anyone but him you'd be punished. its just his choice on which type of punishment he would go for...

sometimes he would take you to base, pulling you down onto his lap. the boys always looked at him funny but he paid them no mind because right now he was the luckiest man on earth to be with his doll.

nsfw

hes very rough with you. whenever you wince thats its too much he always pushes further in you. he believes you can always do better.

his hands would be either; spanking you, on your wrists, massaging your tits, twisting your nipple or his personal favourite around your throat.

he squeezes your throat tightly making sure to knock the wind out of you each time his hips rutted against yours.

or he would wrap his strong arms around you watching how dazed you get.

your wrists would be tied, and he is inlove with shibari harnesses. which definitely leaves bruises all over your body.

he would always be fingering you with a cigar hanging from his mouth, that needy cunt of yours finally getting touched.

if you're biologically male, he would overstimulated you, pinching your nipples whilst going down in you. liking uo all the cum thar landed on your stomach.

forces your head further down on his dick. only slightly going further when he feels resistance.

if you ever got your hands on ropes or handcuffed and somehow managed to tie him up, trust me he isn't lying about breaking the handcuffs or getting free and once he does, trust me, you're gonna feel him for a week.

[elizmanderson]

free shipping with BookShop.Org this Prime Day

on July 11 & 12, 2023, BookShop.Org will offer free shipping to entice book buyers to buy from them rather than Amazon. BookShop is an independent seller owned by a small group of investors, the American Booksellers Association, and employees, and they donate to and partner with independent bookstores around the U.S. to benefit brick-and-mortar indies.

(you can read their "about" here.)

unfortunately, BookShop only ships within the U.S., although they do have a UK branch. (I'm not sure whether the UK branch is offering free shipping for Prime Day, but if you're UK-based it's worth checking!) but if you're U.S.-based and would like to buy The Remarkable Retirement of Edna Fisher (or any other books) with free shipping and WITHOUT supporting Amazon this Prime Day, you can order through BookShop!

additionally, Edna's fantastical journey canonically begins on July 11 - the same day the free shipping starts. what better time to buy the book than the very day it begins?

orders over $100 will also receive a BookShop branded tote bag, which according to the email I received about this whole thing is their first-ever merch.

(I am not associated with BookShop. although I did sign up as an affiliate and do get a small commission when people buy through my affiliate links, which the buy links in this post are. but they didn't ask me to advertise. I'm just an author whose book starts on July 11, just like the free shipping.)

anyway, this Prime Day please consider buying The Remarkable Retirement of Edna Fisher through not-Amazon. the book is an adult contemporary fantasy about an 83-year-old who leaves the nursing home for fantastical adventure and gets oodles of found family.

hardcover | paperback

[bakuhatsufallinlove]

How to Subscribe to Shonen Jump+

Someone asked me for a tutorial on how you can subscribe to the Japanese digital releases of Weekly Shonen Jump even from outside Japan, so, here we go!

THINGS TO KNOW:

A subscription to Weekly Shonen Jump costs 980 yen per month, and it is always charged on the first of the month every month until you cancel. If you purchase your subscription during the middle of the month, you simply have less time before the next charge.

Depending on your credit card, you may also be charged a small foreign transaction fee on top of the 980 yen.

Your first subscription includes the most current issue of WSJ, so if you subscribed on a Saturday, you could still read the issue that was released the prior Monday.

Back issues are not included. You will only have access to the newest issue of WSJ and Jump GIGA when you subscribed and every subsequent issue released after that. To have access to past issues, you have to purchase them individually.

This tutorial is for the desktop web browser version of SJ+. The SJ+ app is different; I have heard you can create a Japanese Google Play or Apple account and purchase giftcards through their respective stores, then download the SJ+ app and buy a subscription with that, but I have no experience with this method.

Shueisha's payment processor can be finicky. It does not accept debit cards, only credit cards. Please note which kinds of credit cards they accept as shown in Step Five.

Because the charge comes from another country, initial attempts may get flagged as fraudulent by your credit card company, so be sure to contact them to confirm the purchase is from you. The site rejected my card a couple times before I was able to clear it with my card issuer and try again.

The SJ+ website is in Japanese; my tutorial includes side-by-side screenshots of the original pages and a machine translation.

Machine translation sites can't access pages you need to log in to see, so if you have any problems and don't understand what you're seeing, take a screenshot and translate the image before continuing.

STEP ONE: Go to the Shonen Jump+ website

They are legally obligated to tell you about cookies. shrug?

STEP TWO: Find the new subscription button and click it

This will take you here! Look at Izuku, beaming at noncommittal passersby, encouraging them to shell out the big bucks just to see his sweet face every week. Click the yellow button to continue.

STEP THREE: Account registration

This initiates account registration. Fill out the information, accept the terms, and usher on. You will have to check your email and click the link they send you to verify your account.

I already had an account, so I don't know if they let you jump right back into your subscription attempt after verifying. If not, go back to to the main page, log in (click ログイン, in the top righthand corner near the new subscription button), and then start the subscription process.

STEP FOUR: Initiate subscription process

STEP FIVE: Enter payment details

Scroll and click the blue button to continue.

STEP SIX: Confirm purchase

It'll look like this. Click the blue button to confirm.

Now you've got a subscription to Weekly Shonen Jump! Wahoooo~!

If you click the blue button to continue, they take you back to their main page with a notice up front.

My Page is where you can see everything you've bought, rented, and the newest issues of your subscribed magazines.

When you are logged in, the main page will look like this:

Notice that you can also access the newest WSJ on the right there.

You can also look at or edit your account information by clicking My Page and going to Customer Information.

Notice that if you need to update your account details or payment information, or cancel your subscription, this is where you will do it.

After you click the red link for canceling, you will be shown a page asking you to confirm. Once you cancel, your subscription will still be valid until the last day of the month in which you cancelled.

And that's how you do it! Have fun! <3

[literaticat]

Publishing aunty please help. Need advice, not publishing related.

What do you do when you're just tired, feeling unfulfilled and want to run away from everything? :( 

That sounds like a classic case of Burnout to me, though it could be combined with something else -- like Depression, or even a medical problem.

(For example, at one point a couple years ago, I was absolutely exhausted for no discernable reason and burst into tears at the drop of a hat -- I chalked it up to "winter blues" and ignored it -- come to find out, eventually, I had severe anemia and my body was not absorbing iron at all and actually it was an autoimmune disorder and became a Whole Thing! Uh... oops!)

This article from the Cleveland Clinic gives a lot of advice about what to do about Burnout -- but the most salient points, I think:

Be gentle with yourself. Everyone goes through it sometimes. You aren't a failure, you're going to be OK, you just have to take care of yourself before you can properly take care of anyone or anything else. So with that resolved:

TELL YOUR SUPPORT SYSTEM HOW YOU ARE FEELING. Keeping this stuff undercover is not going to help. Being honest with your friends/family/partner or whoever your "people" are will lighten your mental load AND they will want to help and support you.

Figure out what your stressors are and tactics to deal with them. Part of this will be linked to the previous part, probably -- For example, if you are burdened by too much work -- DELEGATE or ASK FOR HELP! You've told your support system what's up with you -- now tell them what you need to move forward.

Set Boundaries. If you're the type of person that says yes to everything and then you feel overwhelmed -- remember that it's OK to say NO. It's a good thing, actually. You'll be more "on" for the things that are actually important if you are able to protect your own boundaries and aren't wasting energy on bullshit things. I can't stress enough how important this is (and it's something I am always working on, because it can be tough!) -- but my life CHANGED when I made certain rules for myself and stuck with them. For example, mine: No checking email after 7pm or on weekends. At all. I gotta tell you, my life suddenly got a lot better. (I have forgotten this one recently, and my life has gotten markedly worse -- so I gotta get back to that!)

Go to the doctor. Yes, going to the doctor sucks! But they can make sure your bloodwork is OK, you aren't Vitamin D or Iron deficient, rule out any problems (like, I dunno, severe anemia)... etc etc. Like, step one of Self Care is knowing what your Self is working with. (And if you think you might actually be capital-D Depressed or have anxiety, etc -- ask for a referral to a psychiatrist to see about getting some medicine. IT WORKS!)

Practice Self-Care. Yes, that means the boring stuff like "hydrate" and "make you are getting enough sleep" and "eat your veggies" and "meditate" and whatnot -- but also, you want to "run away from everything"? DO IT. Take a vacation -- or even a staycation -- or even a DAYcation -- where you are literally not doing ANYTHING for anyone else, no email, no nothing. Get a pedicure with extra massage, sit in sunlight with your favorite drink, read a book or just think about NOTHING -- you have no responsibilities except to yourself during this time. It's rejuvenating!

Get toxic feelings out of your system. Find a therapist, if you can afford to do so. (There may be free or inexpensive options if you are a student, or with some insurance, some therapists have a sliding scale for patients, etc) A therapist can give you at least somebody to talk things out with who doesn't know you and isn't judging you. If that's not for you -- journal? Do something artistic? Go to a rage room? Climb a mountain and scream a lot?

Now you are on the road to being healthy, physically and mentally, you hopefully have less stress and are getting your forty winks and all that good stuff -- and hopefully you'll be MUCH better soon.

Good luck!