#ill get a coffee at some point but if i do that now im just gonna be worse some hours later

[magnoliamyrrh]

.

[anxiously-going]

Is it too early to start the day over again?

[rafeandonlyrafe]

dealer

words: 2.5k

warnings: 18+ only!, smut, female receiving oral, mentions of p in v sex, kind of shy/anxious!reader, dealer!rafe, no drug taking is actually done but mentions of weed and coke

“tina, i love you, i really do, but im not buying weed for you.” 

“its not buying! ill give you the money, just go pick it up from my dealer for me.” tina hands you a wad of cash, forcing it into your grip.

“what if i get caught with it?” you question, nerves already flooding your system. you aren't a complete straight edge, you're willing to drink occasionally and you've been to a couple parties before, but illegal drugs are way out of your comfort zone.

“relax, it's just weed! it's not like im having you buy coke from him or something.” tina laughs, and you wonder how this wild child became your best friend. 

“he sells coke?” you squeal.

“listen, babe.” tina places her hands on your shoulders. “you need to live a little. get out of your comfort zone. im not saying you need to take drugs, but you can at least go and pick some up for me.”

“fine.” you sigh, pocketing the cash.

“great!” seeing tinas wide smile, gracing her gorgeous face, is the only reason why you actually agreed to this. “he already knows im sending you to pick it up. he says it has to be today and ive got work.”

“you knew id agree?” you question. 

“of course.” tina shrugs. “you're my best friend.”

“alright, alright. good point.”

--

your eyes are wide as you approach the imposing house. you hesitate on the front porch, but ultimately force your hand to raise and knock on the door.

it opens a few moments later, and you’re not sure why you're surprised at the sight of the dealer. he’s put together and handsome, whereas you expected him to look disheveled and strung out, but you suppose that's more of the user than the seller.

“y/n?” he questions, looking you up and down. you hesitate to respond, your name sounding so smooth and silky coming from him. “picking up for tina?” “oh!” you nod quickly. “yes, yeah. sorry.”

the dealer smiles at you, clearly amused by your nerves. “i’m rafe. come in.”

you follow rafe into the house, shutting the door behind you. he leads you into the living room, gesturing for you to sit on the couch. you slide onto the soft material, not sure if this is normal or not, you’ve never bought any sort of drugs before.

“can i get you something to drink?” rafe asks.

“uh-” you clear your throat, looking around the living room to avoid making eye contact. “water is fine.”

rafe nods, leaving you alone in the spacious room before returning with two glasses of water, one with ice and one without.

“didn’t know if you wanted ice or not, take whichever.” rafe sets them both in front of you on the coffee table, and you reach for the one without ice, taking a polite sip. you’re too nervous to really drink it, but want to be courteous. you’re not sure if rafe is dangerous, he doesn’t really look it, but he must be by nature of being a drug dealer.

“let me grab you tinas weed.” rafe says, exiting the room again to return a moment later, with a baggie of weed in his hand. he sets it on the table, taking a seat on the arm chair across from the couch, facing you.

“tina gave me $50.” you say, pulling the cash out of your pocket and setting it on the table next to the weed. “is that good?”

“yes its good.” rafe laughs, not even bothering to grab the cash off the table and count it.

“i-i don’t smoke.” you say, unsure why you felt the need to make the confession. “or do any drugs. so i don’t really… know anything.”

“would you like me to teach you?” rafe asks, making your eyes widen as you shake your head no.

“i just wanted to explain why i’m so nervous.” you say, hands wringing together on your lap, wanting to escape the house.

“its cute.” rafe simply says with a shrug.

“whats cute?” you hum, confused.

“how nervous you are. you’re adorable.” rafe explains, making you blush and stare at the floor, muttering a quiet thank you.

“i should go now.” you say, needing to get out of under his intense gaze.

“let me walk you to the door.” rafe says, standing. you grab the bag off the table, putting it into your back pocket, regretting not bringing some sort of purse or bag to carry it in.

you stand up, tracing your steps through the complex house back to the front door. “thank you.” you say when rafe opens the door for you.

“no problem, y/n.” rafe practically purs your name out. “tell tina to call me when she gets home from work.”

“did i do something wrong?” you question, suddenly worried until rafe lets out a soft laugh. 

“not at all, baby.” you want to jump at the pet name, but simply nod and head out the door, not glancing back even though you can feel rafes intense eyes on you.

--

“rafe wants you to come to the party this weekend.” tina says.

“no.” you shake your head. “no way.” “come on.” tina flops onto your bed, batting her eyelashes at you. “he said he’d give me my weed for free if i get you to come.” “tina, no! he’s… he’s too intense.” “oh my god.” tinas jaw drops open. “did he flirt with you?” “i… i think so? he called me cute and-” you can’t even finish your sentence as tina screeches. “oh my god!! y/n you have to date him, he’s like the biggest catch on the island!”

“he is a drug dealer, tina! i’ve never even smoked weed and he fucking sells coke.” you whisper the last bit.

“he doesn’t like his girls to do drugs anyways.” tina shrugs. “it’s been like a year since he dated anyone though, and i’ve genuinely heard he’s a really good boyfriend. you remember lily? she was so sad they had to break up, said she only did because her family was moving to california.”

“how good of a boyfriend can a drug dealer be?” you question, not sure how it would be to be mixed up in that world, even if rafe was clearly small time, selling only to his peers on the island.

“think about it.” tina says. “he has a ton of cash, can buy you whatever you want, can get me free weed.” “what if i don’t want to fuel your addiction?” you question, but a smile plays on your lips. tina only smokes every once in a while, and she is by no means addicted, otherwise you wouldn’t agree to have bought the drug for her.

“please come to the party.” tina says, completely switching the subject. “for me.” she pouts, causing you to groan and lean your head back against the pillow while tina thanks you, knowing that means you’ve conceded to her.

--

“y/n.” the voice that you would recognize anywhere purrs into your ear. you whip around, coming face to face with rafe. “i’m glad you could make it.”

“i came because tina asked me to.” you say honestly. 

“ill make sure to get her her weed for free then.” rafe says with a nod, keeping true to his word.

“why did you want me to come?” you question.

“is it not obvious?” rafe raises his eyebrows. “i like you.”

“oh.” you blush, dropping your gaze down. “um… thanks. i like you too.” you know it's in a different way than rafe was implying, but honestly don't know what to say in response.

“yeah?” he questions, a smile playing on his face, completely ignore the guy who you assume must be his friend as he walks by and slaps rafe on the shoulder in greeting. “you like me the same way i like you?”

“it depends i guess…” you're truly trying to flirt back at this point, hoping your nerves don't give your voice a quiver. “how do you like me?”

“well.” rafe smirks, his eyes slowly sinking down your front, looking over your party outfit, a tight dress that tina insisted that you wear, borrowed of course out of her closet. “i want to get to know you better. take you out on a date. show you a good time. kiss you.” rafe leans in, teasingly close until you're able to feel his breath over your mouth. “and if you'd let me, take you up to my room. show you a good time.”

“oh.” you blush, cheeks surely flaring red. you have to clench your thighs together slightly, and it certainly doesn't go unnoticed by rafe. “i guess you could take me out on a date.”

“perfect.” he smiles, another grin that makes you want to melt into a puddle on the floor. he glances towards the door as a new man walks in, looking out of place compared to everyone else, his long black hair tied up in a ponytail. “ive got to go work for a bit, doll. enjoy my party with your friends, ill find you before the night is over.” he leans in, head turning at the last minute to press a delicate kiss to your cheek. 

rafe walks away and greets the man, his demeanor instantly changing from flirty and sultry to smiling and friendly as he claps hands with the new man, who you hear rafe call him barry.

“holy shit, holy shit!” tina runs up to you. you didn't even realize she was watching the entire interaction, so caught up in rafe.

“he wants to take me on a date!” you whisper-scream to tina, well aware that rafe is only on the other side of the room.

“you said yes, right?”

“girl, of course!” --

“hello beautiful.” rafe smiles as you open up the door. you’re glad that your parents are gone for the weekend. they never really care who you’re dating, having developed a lot of trust in you, but you didn’t even want to introduce them to rafe.

“hey rafe.” you smile back, accepting the kiss onto your cheek when he leans forward.

“got us a nice reservation at the country club.” rafe says, hand coming to the small of your back as he leads you towards his truck. he helps you climb in, not wanting you to fall in your heels.

“im really excited.” you admit after rafe rounds the hood and gets into the drivers seat, smoothly backing out of your long driveway.

“not nervous?” rafe questions, calling back to your meeting.

“im not buying drugs from you, so i think im okay.” you giggle, although you do have a bit of anxiety building, but only in the form of slight butterflies in your stomach.

“i like that you’re not a part of that scene.” rafe says, reaching over and looping your fingers together, resting your joined hands on the center console.

“you probably have a lot of girls try to date you to get stuff for free.” you assume.

“yeah.” he admits with a sigh. “don't get me wrong, i get it comes with what i do, but its frustrating to never know if someone is seriously into me.” you’re surprised by rafes confession, seemingly overly intimate and vulnerable for someone with his persona. you lean across the seats as he stops at a red light, pressing your lips to his cheek.

rafe smiles at you, squeezing your hand in appreciation. “can’t wait to kiss you when i drop you off back home.”

“talking about kissing me and haven’t even taken me on the actual date yet?” you say with a laugh.

“baby, i could take about eating you out or taking you from behind or kissing you. all of them are going to happen very soon.” your cheeks turn red as you swallow, suddenly turning silent as rafe pulls into the country club.

you’re not surprised how rafe is recepted as he leads you inside, the wait staff not even having to ask his name, already calling him mr. cameron before leading you towards the reserved table.

“this is really nice.” you admit with a whisper. you’ve never been inside of the country club before. you had heard that they have a pool, golf course, a bar restaurant area and then the fancier restaurant that you’re currently in, but you never had any reason to join.

“only the best for you, gorgeous.” rafe says with a smooth grin.

the dinner goes by just as smooth as his smile. its a set menu by the chef, but you found everything to be delicious, and feel perfectly filled by the end of it, not too stuffed but not hungry for more. you also feel like you know rafe much better, the conversation easily flowing.

its no surprise when rafe drives you back home that his hand lands on your thigh, even managing to creep underneath your skirt and touch your bare skin without you hollering and pushing his hand away like you would with any other guy.

“about that kiss…” rafe says when he gets you back home, standing on your doorstep.

“kiss and then what else were you talking about?” you hum, already knowing you’ve got a wet sport formed on your underwear just from his hand on your leg. “eating me out and taking me from behind?” “are you saying i can do all of those things tonight?” rafe smirks. he didn’t expect to get in your bed after one date, thinking he’d have to work a whole lot harder to convince you, but you are far too needy to deny him entry.

“i certainly won’t tell you no.” you smile, the grin quickly wiped off your face when rafe leans in, one hand on your cheek and the other moving to your waist, pulling you in tight to his body as his lips devour yours, mouth hot and wet against yours.

you fist a hand in his shirt, needing some sort of stabilization as you kiss for all your neighbors to see, moaning into his mouth when his hand moves lower to grip your ass, feeling the plump flesh under the fabric of your skirt.

you pull away from the kiss only to take a step backwards into the house, rafe quickly following you in. you practically race up to your room, trying not to seem too desperate.

the illusion is broken when rafe finally gets between your legs, having slowly undressed you and pressed kisses all over your body, showing special attention to your chest but ignoring your pussy until he was also naked, now laid between your spread thighs.

“such a pretty pussy for me baby.” rafe coos. “all mine now, understood?” “yeah, yeah.” you nod. “all yours.” you think to yourself that you will have to thank tina for begging you to pick up her drugs that day, and all the convincing shes done since as rafe leans forward, tongue swiping through your folds.

you let out a moan, hand reaching down to grip rafes hair as he moves upward, sucking your clit into his mouth.

yeah, you’ll definitely have to thank tina.

taglist: @drewstarkeyslut @forstarkey @f4ll-for-you @dilvcv @drudyslut @jjmaybankswifes-blog @rafescokenostril @jjsmarijuana @seeingstarks @angelofcigs @cece45450 @babygorewhore @vanessa-rafesgirl @michelleisheres-blog @outerbankspov @drewstarkeyswifehoe @cutielando @kamninaries @buckyswhxre @rafeinterlude @bellbottombaby @deeaardiary @rubixgsworld @wearemadeofstardust0 @leighbronk @starkeysheart @pradabambie

[hanggarae]

GROWL - ARE YOU ATTRACTED TO ME TOO ?

↺ content your ceo has made a point of making your life a living hell and you aren’t sure how long you can keep up with it, part 2 of my ‘promotion’ series, ceo!jeonghan, f!office worker!reader, jeonghan’s such an asshole in this part even worse than in part one, jeonghan is so dumb and clueless, bffs bss, this is honestly hardly a tear jerker so idk if it’s technically angst but ig ?? idk 😞

↺ a/n : 3.5k words, npr, another enemies to lovers jeonghan, loosely based off of lyrics from growl by exo but also lowk not ?? im trying to finish this series as quick as i can bc i know that when i start studying ill go back to the irregular posting schedule and this will never see the light outside my drafts (like the chan thoughts part which i had ready for months but never got around to posting)

‘He’d get bored of trying to get a rise out of you in a month or less so all you had to do was put up with him until then’

Life was a bitch, a petty bitch- and so was Jeonghan.

It’d been four months since you became his assistant, or as you like to call it: four months of hell. He didn’t go easy on you one bit and constantly belittled you.

Ever since you left that night without him knowing he made it his personal goal to continue punishing you for it by constantly gave you tasks were no less than humiliating. You underestimated just how petty a grown man could be. Despite him clearly finding this job boring, he stayed due to the laugh he got out of making you suffer. What’s worse is you couldn’t deny the fact that he was too pretty for his own good.

“Here is your schedule for the day, sir” you forced a smile on your face, handing your boss his coffee brewed exactly how he enjoys it (you learnt that the hard way when Jeonghan once took the cup out of your hands and poured it all over your desk and paperwork, ridiculing you for ‘not being useful enough to even make a decent coffee’).

Jeonghan simply stared at you, bringing the cup to his lips and taking an obnoxiously loud sip. “Reschedule the meeting with Hong, I don’t want to have it today” he mumbled, bored of the day already.

You tried your best to compose yourself and not throw that coffee in his face while you scream about how he’s an incompetent brat that needs to actually get some work done. But you couldn’t do that so you settled with the satisfaction of imagining the scene in your head.

“Unfortunately sir, that isn’t possible. You’ve already rescheduled three times, and Joshua’s been-”

Jeonghan seemed to perk up at that, “oh the meetings with Shua? Why didn’t you say that silly? you can bring him in right now”

“I’ve told you it’s with him four times but alright-”

“No back talk or I’ll demote you to coffee maker”

You bit back the words on the tip of your tongue and instead started to walk over to the reception where Joshua was waiting.

You remember Joshua. He was still Jeonghan’s friend even back in high school, although he never picked on you like Jeonghan did. From what you remember, Joshua wasn’t really interested in proving himself when it came to academics.

“Mr Yoon will see you now” you told him politely, holding the door open for him to follow you.

“About time” he laughed with no real offence, “he really took his time, huh?”

You simply returned his laugh and agreed with him wordlessly, leading him to Jeonghan’s office. The man in question gave his longtime friend a loud greeting.

“Shua I had no idea the meeting was with you” the long haired man scoffed, “my assistant over here told me it was with your uncle”

“If that’s what you thought I don’t blame you for postponing it as much as you did” Joshua laughed easily, dispersing your anger toward your boss.

The two continued to talk for another hour or so while you drowned out the noise and focused on the task Jeonghan had given you. Times like these really tempted you to quit because what sort of maniac gives you one day to finish organising a dinner with some business partners.

When Joshua was ready to leave you followed him out and waved him goodbye before mentally preparing yourself for your boss giving you his very much unwanted undivided attention.

“y/n, you don’t have anything planned for next week do you?” your boss stated more than asked while looking through his own planner. “Any personal plans outside of work?”

His attitude irked you so much.

“Well I have a dinner with my friends for-”

“Cancel it.” Jeonghan stated plainly.

You blinked a few times, laughing awkwardly. There’s no way he was being serious right?

“I’m sorry sir?”

“You heard me. Cancel it” he approached you even closer. “And pack your bags, we’re going on a business trip tomorrow night”

Your mouth opened, anger painting your features but Jeonghan left before you could argue.

This wasn’t fair. Next week was your birthday, your friends insisted on planning a dinner for you and you were honestly really looking forward to it. Knowing Jeonghan though that didn’t mean anything to him, he’d probably laugh at you for even thinking that gave you an excuse.

Luckily, you might still make it in time for your birthday dinner. Jeonghan explained the details of the trip to you and your plane was on Thursday night, meaning you’d get back on Friday at around 6am. The dinner was planned for Friday night so if you could power through the jet lag and sleep deprivation you’d enjoy that dinner with your friends.

If you were being honest you weren’t entirely sure what you were doing on this trip. Other than ordering his room service there really wasn’t any use in your being there. Eventually you came to the conclusion that Jeonghan dragged you along in favour of just making you suffer.

For some odd reason though, Jeonghan liked to drag you along to whatever parties and dinner his aristocratic friend group enjoyed throwing.

And although it was a pretty sight, you could only really just feel out of place being there.

Like tonight, the venue was absolutely gorgeous but you didn’t belong here. Not with people that had six digits in their savings from the moments they learnt to talk.

To your surprise however, Jeonghan was uncharacteristically tame. After the way he’s treated you the last few months it was safe to assume that he would go out of his way to embarrass you any chance he got at these dinners but he was surprisingly helping you adjust well.

Tonight was your last night in Paris and the two of you were attending a dinner hosted by his associate. Wonwoo was nice, he was down to earth despite probably having more money than everyone in your branch combined.

What wasn’t nice was the way Jeonghan was stalling getting out of here. Did he want you guys to miss the plane?

“We need to head to the airport now if we’re planning on catching that plane?” You urged, trying to reason with your boss while everyone around you was distracted.

“Wouldn’t that be rude of us?” Jeonghan scoffed before smirking, “did nobody ever teach you any manners, y/n?”

No matter how much you urged Jeonghan, he wouldn’t budge. You thought it was pretty much useless at this point, debating on whether or not you should text your friends to reschedule the dinner or just let them enjoy it without you.

As you watched the flight updates on your phone and saw the signal that your flight had already left, you felt tears well up in your eyes. You were so tired of this. How many tears were you going to lose on this? On him? He didn’t even matter to you.

And you weren’t sure why you mattered to him. Just because he’s too petty to forget about something that happened in high school?

The entire drive back to the hotel, you kept refreshing the tab to see if there were any other flights but it was no use. The only ones available would make you arrive too late for the dinner so there was no way you were making it on time.

It seemed silly, being this upset about a dinner. But you hadn’t gotten the chance to properly celebrate your birthday, or anything really, in years and it felt nice for your friends to plan an entire night just dedicated to you. And you probably felt worse about all of their efforts going to waste.

When you made it back to the hotel you didn’t say a word to Jeonghan. You didn’t curse at him, you didn’t scream at him, you didn’t defend yourself from his comments.

You just.. headed back to your room and texted your friends that you were sorry.

You stayed in your room for another twenty minutes, thinking about what Jeonghan’s motive was. There was no way you could continue working with him.

A notification on your phone drew your attention. An email from some cosmetics brand wishing you a happy birthday and giving you a coupon code to celebrate.

It was only then that you realised it was now just a few minutes after midnight meaning it was officially your birthday.

Even though you should be happy, only more tears fell.

You don’t know how long you just sat on the bed, wallowing in your own self pity before somebody knocked at the door.

You quickly dried your tears before pulling it open, gasping at the sight in front of it.

Jeonghan stood there, a huge smile on his face, holding a cake that read ‘Happy birthday’ in green frosting. You hated green.

“Happy birthday y/n” he greeted loudly. There was something so sick and twisted about this. Maybe even sadistic.

Before you knew it you were tearing up again. Was this some sort of sick joke? He ruins the only plans you’ve had, the only time you’ve asked something of him these past months as his assistant, the only time you asked him to cut you some slack and he’s.. standing there smiling with a cake that has frosting of a color you hate.

“Sir, when we get back tomorrow- or whenever we do, you need to find a new assistant because I can no longer do this” you told him plainly, too tired of the way he’s treated you.

You ignored the way his face fell and eyes widened, “If I can’t return to my old position then I’d like to be transferred to a different branch. And if that’s also not possible then I resign from the company”

You didn’t wait for his answer, you didn’t wait for him to laugh and call you pathetic for quitting halfway through, you just closed the door and went to bed.

Jeonghan didn’t fly on the same flight as you, probably staying in Paris for an extra few days but you honestly weren’t sure. And you honestly didn’t care.

Despite saying you’d try staying at the company, you realised you wouldn’t be able to without feeling uncomfortable. And Jeonghan was in a position where he could still make your life hell so you simply resigned altogether.

You were a valued employee and were smart in keeping connections with big companies you’ve worked with on projects in the past, and even the few you met in your week in Paris. So you really weren’t worried about finding a new job, maybe it’d even be better than your last one.

It’d been three months since you quit working at the Yoon company and although it was nothing special at your new job it beat having an asshole boss setting you up for failure everyday.

It’d honestly be a lie to say you haven’t thought about Jeonghan since quitting. Partially because you now worked under Choi Seungcheol, who you learnt was one of Jeonghan’s best friends. Meaning you’d sometimes run into him but you never spared him a second glance.

Ever since you got the new job you decided to do some things that you’ve been meaning to but never got around to- one of them being to get a new apartment.

You’ve been living in your current one since just after you graduated college and you could definitely afford to now upgrade it. The place you’ve been looking at was in a far better neighbourhood and building.

You decided to pull the trigger on it sooner rather than later, knowing that the longer you put it off the more likely you were to just discard the idea in the end.

You hated making second trips to carry luggage, so you decided to carry all of your moving boxes in one go, despite the fact that all of them piled in your arms blocked practically your entire line of vision.

Just as you were getting off the elevator you heard the person getting on chuckle lightly at the sight in front of them.

“You need any help with that?” The voice sounded oddly familiar you thought as he started to grab most of the boxes from your arms before you could protest.

Oh is he serious?

You looked unimpressed at the man in front of you, “Give me my boxes back.”

“What-” he hadn’t noticed you until you said that. Glaring at him, clearly unhappy with seeing him again.

Jeonghan simply scoffed, not giving you the boxes back and only asking you what number he needed to take them to.

“You can take them back to my arms” you bickered despite leading him to your apartment anyway.

“Don’t think Cheol’s gonna like how you can’t type for two weeks because you broke your arms while moving” he argued back, doing a double take when he saw the number outside of your door. Giggling when he realised.

Before you could ask him what was going on he giggled, “And, it wouldn’t make me a very good neighbour, would it?”

He smiled before using his own keys to open the door of the apartment right across from yours. This cannot be real.

“You live here?” You whined, not caring if it made you look childish in front of him anymore.

“Mhm” he hummed coming back to you to help you get all the boxes inside, “Let me know if you need help with anything else, neighbour”

“So he lives literally down the hall?” Soonyoung asked you, taken aback. “Small world”

“I’m still convinced he had something to do with it” you grasped your soda can tighter, the metal denting under the pressure.

“You think he’ll be there right now?” Seokmin asked, taking another handful of popcorn.

“Why? Do you want him to give us some michelin star food or something?” Seungkwan asked, continuing to look through the selection of movies for you guys to watch.

“If he does don’t eat it! He probably poisoned it or something” you muttered bitterly.

It was just your luck for the person you despised most to just happen to now live three steps away from you.

It’d only been a week since you moved here but you’d already ran into him five times. Five times too many in your opinion. You were ready to complain about him all over again until the doorbell rang.

“What do you want?” You said crossing your arms over your chest.

“Well it seemed like such a fun party over here. How could I miss out, am I right?” You realised really was the most arrogant man you’ve ever met when he invited himself in and made himself comfortable on your couch. “What’re we watching?”

You also realised your friends were not loyal. Despite cursing him out with you for the last few months they were too quick to become friends with him- even if it was because of the alcohol you really did not care.

It was approaching 3am and you couldn’t sleep, the guys all getting too drunk and crashing on your couch in the other room.

After tossing and turning a few more times you crawled out of your bed and into the building’s hallway, careful to tread lightly to not wake anyone up even Jeonghan.

Ever since your landlord gave you the keys to your apartment and access to the building’s rooftop you think you’ve been here everyday since.

The cool breeze always hit you just perfectly, momentarily letting you forget about everything in the world.

It really wasn’t fair. How Jeonghan treated you. You laugh to yourself when you realise you hold the same thoughts as your high school self, upset that her crush all of a sudden started to insult her for being top of the class.

You’d like to say that you don’t care about what Jeonghan thinks about you, but you know you’d be lying to yourself. That inner teenager of yours that still wants Jeonghan to like her back.

You don’t think you like Jeonghan anymore- but you also don’t think you hate him. And when you realise you don’t hate him after the way he’s treated you, you think you must like him at least a little to forget about that.

“Stop biting your nails” a voice from beside you says.

You don’t recognise it at first and instantly lunge at whatever it is, thinking it was a crazed psycho killer or something.

“Okay I get I wasn’t a saint to you but you didn’t have to hit me in the face y/n what the fuck?” The man groaned.

“Well maybe you should stop sneaking up on me Yoon” you forced out despite feeling a little guilty.

“Well I wouldn’t have to sneak up on you if you acted like a normal person and didn’t leave your apartment at 3am!” He scoffed, flicking your forehead with his finger lightly.

You glared at him before turning back to look at the view over the city.

“We’re not friends, I’d appreciate if you stopped acting like we were”

“We’re not friends? And here I was buying us matching cups” fake pouted, the same way he would when you worked for him and complained about the workload.

The more you remembered how it was like having Yoon Jeonghan as your boss the less you wanted to even be near him.

“You’re not funny, Yoon” you mumbled. Not like he cared.

“You’re not my employee anymore, y/n. I don’t care if you call me by my name now” Jeonghan looked at you.

You think you got even angrier when you looked back at him. Pretty privilege was real and Yoon Jeonghan probably benefited from it the most. Even at 3am and drinking for hours he’s still beautiful enough for you to forget how awful of a person he is.

“Even so, I’m nobody compared to you and I’m nobody to you,” you laughed bitterly, “So I’d prefer to not call you by your first name. Just like you requested”

“You really hold a grudge, don't you?”

“Fuck you Jeonghan” you looked at him baffled, “I hold a grudge? You tormented me for months because of some stupid thing that happened in high school that wasn’t even my fault”

“And even now you’re-” you sputtered, “you’re still trying to blame me. I didn’t do anything to you Jeonghan! You’re the asshole that did everything to me!”

You expected Jeonghan to get mad at your rant and say something back, instead he just stared at, ghost of a smile on his lips and some unreadable glint in his eyes. “You said my name”

You rolled your eyes, scoffing. He really could not take anything serious. “What is wrong with you?”

“I’ve been asking myself that too” he got closer to you, “you know ever since you left I’ve strangely been really sad in the office. Moping around looking for something- or someone”

“After a while I realised that was you. I missed you, y/n. And then I realised I like-”

“This has to be the worst confession I have ever heard of, Jeonghan” you looked at him surprised at how he could even begin to think this was what a good confession sounded like. “If anything this just makes me think you’re a sadist who enjoys making the girl they like cry everyday in the office bathrooms”

“Cut me some slack, I only worked this out two weeks ago” Jeonghan whined, and you really had to question if he genuinely believed this would get you to forget the way he acted. “I’ve seen the damn Notebook, we’re supposed to start kissing in the rain now”

“After the hell you put me through Jeonghan, I deserve a lot more than whatever you just threw together” you said before starting to walk away.

“Wait!” Jeonghan quickly grabbed ahold of your wrist before you could leave. “What do I have to do to get you to.. you know, look I’m not good at this!”

“Well for starters I think you should look up the definition of what liking someone is and how people usually act when they do like someone. When you work out how to love them right then let me know”

“Wait but before I start to show you that I can be a good person and an even better boyfriend, can you at least let me know it’s not completely useless. Like you’re not just going to reject me in the end to get back at me” Jeonghan looked at you desperately.

“I’ll see you around” you said before leaving, retreating to your apartment for the night. But Jeonghan could see the ghost of a smile on your lips.

Jeonghan was an idiot, he thought to himself, but he had a chance. He had to work this out somehow- and quick. You were a pretty girl, probably the prettiest girl Jeonghan had ever seen, you definitely had other guys interested and if he wasn’t quick he’d end up losing you to them.

[dmc-tings]

The Lord's helping their s/o recover from an injury

Alcina Dimitrescu

She had left you in care of her daughter's

Or them in your care

She was leaving to meet with the other Lord's and Mother Miranda

Lady D gone, the girls wanted to play a game

Hide and seek!!

They hide and you... well you don't seek

You actually just do whatever, and they end up popping up whenever

You sat on the balcony, reading and enjoying some coffee

The girls had started to play earlier in the day

It was afternoon, when you started to get worried about them

You got up to search rhe castle

Finding your way into the library, you heard their laughter

One at the top of the steps Daniela, shot out in front of you

Letting out a "boo", raising her hands above you (you know like a monster on Halloween)

You yelped and tumbled down both sets of stairs

"Uh oh..." Cassandra said, standing next to her sisters

You landed heavily on your side, blood streaming from your head

The girls rushed to you, finding you knocked unconscious

Things got worse, as Alcina finally came home and saw the trio trying to maneuver you to your room

"What happened?!" She barked, taking you from them

Though not listening for an answer she took you up

You sturred in her arms, "Al...Alcina?"

She shushed you, caressing your cheek

"You have a head wound, Darling. But do not fall asleep."

You tried to nod, but failed, resting your head on her shoulder

Once bandaged up, she asked you what happened

You explained, leaving out the part about the girls scaring you

She nodded and looked at you wound

"You'll stay here with me until your fully healed."

You tried to argue, but she only stood, taking you with her

And tucked you in

For the next few weeks, Alcina took care of all your needs

Food, drink, changing your bandages, keeping you company

She almost gave you a bath, but you protested to the point of almost being drug into the bathroom

She finally conceded and let you bathe alone (sometimes)

"Why are you coddling me, Alcina? I'm an adult! Yo-"

"If something where to happen to you. If I was to lose you, my wrath would know no end."

You shut your face after that

And finally let her take care of you

Your head finally fully healed and Alcina finally backed off

She keeps a better eye in you though

Salvatore Moreau

"Its was an accident, Salvatore."

"You shouldn't have been there, my precious."

You where in the bed, surrounded by blankets

Bruised ribs, is what Donna told you

And you knew you couldn't move

But that don't matter now, your safe

Salvatore kept you there, serving you hand and foot

But you had gotten tired off his constant condescending tones

"Darling, shut it. Your not helping me heal by stressing us BOTH out. Please." You rubbed your head

And he promptly shut his mouth, reaching over with a cool hand, soothing you

Letting out a humm, you enjoyed his hand, gently rubbing your now throbbing head

Smiling, your fish man stood and you let out a whine

"Im going to get you some pain medicine, my dear. Ill be back shortly." He promised, lumbering away

He kept his word, bring you something for your ribs and head

He helped you sit up, and you huffed after taking the medicine

"Im sorry for snapping at you..."

You know he never took your snapping at him as a serious matter, he was always patient with you

Moreau took your hand in his and smiled

"My Precious. You know I don't mind."

You frowned, whincing from the pain and from his gentle tone

"You get it enough from the big bitch and metal bastard.... I shouldn't give you shit..."

He hummed, sensing your pain, both emotional and physical

"Yes... but do rest..."

You settled down for another nap

This continued for a few weeks...

Until you were able to walk on your own

Yet he ordered some of the Vârcolac to keep at your side

Angie and Donna Beneviento

It happened in the damn garden

You told Donna to get rid of the roots from some of the bigger plants

But she insisted it was for the better

And now you were sitting still with ice on your sprained ankle

And your girlfriend buzzing about like a bee

"Im sorry. I didn't think they would get in the way like that..."

You tried to tell her that it was fine but she kept coming into the room and out of the room

Handing you tea and snacks every ten damn minutes

You finally grabbed her and pulled her into your lap

"Donna. My love. Dearest thing. Please. Calm down. I just sprained my ankle. I just need to stay off of it for a while ok?"

Donna finally took a few breaths and relaxed against you

"O-ok. I-"

You patted her head and gently rubbed her back.

"Yeah, yeah. Just be quiet for a bit ok?"

She could really be worrisome, and sometimes you had to remind her to cool it.

She soon fell asleep on you and you followed suit

Karl Heisenberg

"I told you to keep outta my part of the Factory. And look at you now. All wrapped up like a burrito."

You glared at him

It was true, your food was wrapped up like a burrito

But that was because your boyfriend was an idiot

A mechanical genius

But a fat idiot when it came to matters about you.

"Karl. I only stubbed my toe. You're over reacting."

He huffed and placed a tray of food on your lap

And sat next to your foot, giving it a poke

You frowned and kicked him with your bandage boot

Well tried to

In retaliation, he stood up and laid on you with his full weight

Knocking the wind out of you

It was just his way of keeping you still and in his arms

Just an idiots way of dealing with the love of his life

[arlowthenacho]

꧁༺ 𝓱𝔂𝓭𝓻𝓪𝓽𝓮 𝓸𝓻 𝓭𝓲𝓮-𝓭𝓻𝓪𝓽𝓮 ༻꧂

(spencer reid x reader/platonic!bau x reader)

summary: spencer isn’t drinking enough water when you’re away on a case. you call him, the team hears, chaos ensues.

warnings: fluffy! set in early s5, mention of getting shot, use of y/n, some cursing, pet names (baby, babe, sweetheart), intended lowercase. if i missed any, please let me know!

a/n: hi there! this is my first fic, so rlly any interaction/feedback is appreciated! this is also extremely self indulgent, but enjoy! the ending is kinda shit, apologies 🙇‍♀️

the soft rustling of paper and the quiet buzz of chatter is all that can be heard on the plane. the team had been presented a new case and have been flying for about an hour. they had been filling the silence by going over the details of the case, chatting with each other, or in your case, trying to convince your boyfriend to take a goddamn sip of water.

“spencer, for the love of god, i’m not asking you to throw your coffee machine out the window! please, take but a sip of water, i beg of you!” you’re practically hissing into the phone, trying to keep your voice down and failing miserably.

“y/n, im fine, i swear! i’ll just drink some later, i’m just really busy-” spencer’s reply comes out slightly crackly through the phone. he had been shot in the leg on a recent case and was not cleared to travel, therefore being left in penelope’s care, and only being able to communicate through phone calls.

“i left you a bottle of water on pen’s desk, it’s literally right in front of you!” you can hear emily snickering in the background and give her a half-hearted glare.

“yeah, pretty boy, why don’t you drink your water?” derek decides to chime in, a smug look plastered on his face. you shoot him a glare and whack his arm. “ow!”

you roll your eyes at derek’s whining and go back to your conversation with spencer.

“spence, please. just finish one bottle of water and then i’ll let you off the hook.” your tone is teetering on begging him and demanding him. at this point, the entire team can hear your conversation and are all snickering not-so-discreetly.

“spencer, please just listen to y/n. i don’t want to listen to this for another 4 hours.” this time, it’s rossi who interrupts you. his tone is so serious it’s funny.

spencer blushes a bright red on the other end and you can hear penelope teasing him relentlessly.

“ok, ok, fine! i’ll finish the water. happy?” his reply comes out in a high-pitched voice, clearly showing his embarrassment.

“very. thank you, spence,” he can hear the smile in your voice as you say your goodbyes and hang up the phone.

pretty much immediately after the fact, emily pipes up.

“you guys are so adorable it makes me ill,” she feigns annoyance by rubbing at her temples, concealing her smile quite terribly. you roll your eyes and go back to the file in front of you.

“that’s really unfortunate, em. feel better!” you teased, huffing out a chuckle.

“okay, the case?” hotch’s stern reply earns a groan from the rest of the team as your eyes drift back down to the folder in front of you.

you’re now a couple days into the case, and everything’s going to shit. you’re no closer to finding the scumbag of the month and the team is losing hope.

after a few seconds of thinking, you’re suddenly pulled out of your thoughts when your phone rings, spencer’s name lighting up the screen. you answer near immediately, holding the phone to your ear.

“spence? baby? you got some good news f’me?” a smile touches you’re lips as soon as you answer, standing up and walking to the evidence board.

“yes and no, which do you wanna hear first?” spencer’s biting his lip in excitement and vibrating in his chair.

“lets hear the bad news first, baby,” you deflate at his words, leaning your back against the nearest wall.

“well, the trail we though we had on the unsub went cold,” spencer winces when he hears you sigh. “but we found a relative, penelope’s sending the address right now,” your smile soon returns as you kiss the phone, making an obnoxious sound in the speaker.

“im kissing your lovely little brains spence, thank you!” you make a few more kissing noises before spencer talks again.

“um-thank you, y/n,” his cheeks are flushed and he stutters through his sentences, biting his lip and smiling. “i-uhm…i also…finished my water…” you can barely make out what he’s saying, his whispered words slurring together.

“what was that, sweetheart?”

“i-i finished…i finished the water you gave me,” he speaks a bit louder, enunciating his words slightly better. you light up at his confession, smiling so wide your cheeks ache.

“thats great, spence! im very proud of you,” you gush, positively beaming.

“th-thank you, y/n, really,” he’s blushing even more now, his stammering worsening by the second.

”of course, babe. now, i gotta go, but i’ll call you when i’m back at the hotel, ‘kay? love you spence, bye!” you wait until spencer says goodbye to hang up the phone, smiling like a kid on christmas day.

after a couple more days, the case was finally over. the criminal being caught and locked away.

the jet ride home was uneventful, other than some light chatter and a well-deserved nap.

***

you’re soon stepping off the jet, along with the rest of the team, and hailing a cab to take you back home. soon, someone pulls over and you hop into the backseat. you give the driver your address and pull out your phone to text spencer.

spencie poo 💌

im omw home right now, see you soon :)

his reply comes back almost immediately.

okay, see you then!

you snap your flip phone shut and wait the remaining few minutes to get to your house.

***

after about 10 minutes, the ride is finally over. you pay the cab driver and thank him for driving you before speeding over to the door of your apartment building. you open it and buzz yourself in, walking to the elevator and pressing the button to get to your floor.

after getting off the elevator, you pull out your keys and unlock your apartment, dropping your things and toeing off your shoes.

“spence? you in here?” you call out into the seemingly empty apartment, plopping down on the couch and feeling around for the remote.

“here, y/n! just a minute,”

after a few seconds, spencer comes out and sits down in the spot next to you. you immediately curl into his side and sigh in contentment and exhaustion.

“‘m so tired, spence…” your words slur together, the drowsiness in your voice highlighted.

“i know…this case was a rough one.” he wraps his arm around you, drawing lazy circles on your shoulder. you let out a soft groan and cuddle closer to him.

“y’know, you really need to drink more water,” you giggle, limp in his arms.

“yeah…i know…” he has a guilty look on his face as he leans down to kiss your hairline. “i did finish that bottle of water you left me though,” he laughs breathlessly.

“hmm, thats good. ‘m very proud, spencer.” you can barely process what he’s saying, even though your words are sincere.

“okay baby, lets get you to bed,” spencer effortlessly picks you up and makes the short walk to your bedroom, laying you down on the plush bed.

after making sure you’re comfortable, he climbs in next to you and turns off the light.

“i love you, spence.”

”i love you too, y/n.”

[camryntheking]

Ok! My thoughts on 7x05!

First, i just wanna say that the whole Hen and Karen storyline is awesome! I love that the show is giving queer people so much screen time, especially a Black lesbian couple! And i think its super sweet that they really want to try for Mara! I hope it works out!

Next, i think that has been my favorite cold open so far. The “ITS MEEE” gets me every time (i have already watched it loads of times). I dont have much to comment on it other than it was funny as fuck

Ok. The date scene. I was hoping to see more of Eddie watching them (especially after the stills), but oh well. The second-hand embarrassment i got was… a lot. But i dont think its necessarily a bad thing. It showed how out of his comfort zone Buck was and how he was trying to navigate a terrifying situation. And Tommy? I might have to retract my earlier retraction. Cos wtf?? Literally had just finished talking about how its hard to accept yourself in a “macho” field, then makes a dig at Buck when he fumbles? Not cool. Then not communicating what was happening until he was getting in the Uber? You dont just abandon someone at a restaurant like that. I understand the “you’re not ready” thing, but that was a dick move.

Also, Buck, baby. Sweetheart. Darling. “I look at hot guys’ asses.” Sweetie. Like Maddie said. You are more than an ally lmao. I also just love how Maddie showed interest in getting to know who Buck was talking about and treating the convo after like a normal convo. Because it is! And i love it! But she also emphasized talking to Eddie, because she knew that Eddie would not react poorly. I feel like that just shows how everyone knows how close Buck and Eddie are. TLDR, Maddie is an awesome sister and Buck is lucky to have her ❤️

Next point, the scene where Buck and Tommy talk over coffee. I do think that the hand holding at the end is very sweet and shows how Buck is really trying to be more open, but Tommy is just really starting to rub me the wrong way. Pretty much everything he said contradicts what happened in the date scene. I feel like him being at the wedding is really gonna spark some Jealous Eddie, tho, so i am excited to see that lmao

And Eddie and Marisol? I feel like the show is going in a direction that leads them to breaking up. Like yes, it is showing growth for Eddie and allowed him to acknowledge that he has Catholic guilt, but theres just. No chemistry. It feels awkward. I feel like her being an ex-nun is gonna bring up some issues with Buck and Eddie will not stand for that. I also wanted to point out that i got even more vibes that Eddie could be demisexual, cos he didnt straight up say that he loved Shannon, just that he loved being married to her. And he knows that he is moving too fast and needs to step back a bit

Finally, Buck coming out to Eddie. I do find it funny that Eddie seemed more shocked that Tommy wasnt straight than figuring out Buck isnt straight. But its awesome that Eddie showed interest and genuinely wanted to help Buck through the issue. And the hug? Finally! Give me men not being afraid to hug each other! I feel like this is allowing Buck and Eddie to become even closer (i do hope for Buddie eventually)

Overall, i feel like this episode was great for setting up the development of Buck and Eddie’s relationship (whether it ends up being platonic or romantic). And i am all for Buck exploring his sexuality with someone that isnt Eddie. While Tommy isnt my favorite right now, i do think that he is great for the progression of Buck’s story. I do hope to see more of Dad!Bobby in the coming episodes and how Buck’s parents might react to Tommy. I dont wanna wait three weeks for the next episode 😢. Im ready for the chaos of the Madney wedding

If i think of anything else ill add on, but i think thats all i have for now. Feel free to share your thoughts!

[takitafulily]

Misadventures of the MCs #07

Taking the Besties home pt4: MM!MC

(Slight Spoilers if you haven't played Mystic Messenger)

MM!MC: I'm not too spacious with accommodations but at least it's decent. I doubt the bed could fit all of us so half of us will need sleeping bags. Don't pick up my phone if it's buzzing, just tell me or someone might actually end up dead- No I'm not kidding- Try not to touch any stacks of paper or important looking documents or I'll be fucked-

LTD!MC: So do you just casually live in a stranger's apartment?-

MM!MC: I mean... yeah...

TWST!Yuu: Hey at least it's not going to tobble over any second or used to belong to dead people

MM!MC: ...about that-

OB!MC: At least they're just living in a stranger's apartment, they're not living WITH the strangers

WHB!MC: Yeah, at least they actually HAVE a place to live

LTD!MC: ... *sigh*

TWST!Yuu: Yo you have a stalker

MM!MC: ...how do you know that?

TWST!Yuu: When you have 4 people ready to jumpscare you daily, you gain a 6th sense for it.

MM!MC: huh, that's neat

TWST!Yuu: *stares at them*

MM!MC: oh, the stalker? Eh leave him be or he'll kidnap you for some cult.

TWST!Yuu: ...and here I thought I was desensitised-

(In the RFA chat)

707: hey MC do you have friends over at Rika's appartment?

MC: which one theres like 5 here

Yoosung: WHAT

707: WHAT

Yoosung: THERE'S MORE PEOPLE THAT KNOWS WHERE RIKA'S APPARTMENT IS???

707: THERE'S 5 PEOPLE AT RIKA'S APARTMENT???

Jumin: Wait that doesn't sound like MC

Jaehee: I agree Mx MC doesn't usually text like that

MC: oh if your talking about MM!MC theyre fighting with LTD!MC over a budget or wtev rn

707: what

MC: *picture of MM!MC yelling whilst holding up a piece of paper with numbers on it and LTD!MC point at the paper whilst holding a cup of coffee*

Zen: *gasp* a picture of MC

Jaehee: Wait so who is texting us right now?

MC: lol this is TWST!Yuu

MC: im just watching the drama lol OB!MC and WHB!MC went looking for the stalker even though MM!MC told them not to lol

MC: OH FUCK THE HAIR IS GETTING INVOLVED THIS IS GETTING GOOD ILL SEE YOU GUYS NEVER LMAO

Jumin: ...

Yoosung: ...

Jaehee: ...

Zen: ...

707: ... wtf just happened

*V entered the chat.*

V: hey guys what did I miss?

[employee052]

little poster for a minicomic im working on thats half au / half backstory for virgil and the tsp gang in my universe called "la vie en jaune" (or life in yellow in french) (i think) (idk i live in canada)

for a full infodump on this au ill put it under the cut bc this au is an amalgamation of portal 2 (which takes from cave johnson, caroline, aperture, while also taking from a chelley fic i read) , simon from adventure time, kingsman, and floating megane's ted nivison comics on insta.

the plot:

Virgil works at a company called Ouroboros Technologies, whos goal is to make gadgets that automate the process of buisnesses (though they never go beyond that explanation, it pays hella money so ppl dont question it).

Anyways, Virgil's job is to hire and manage the new employees in his division. And at his 427th employee he hires Stanley Rider (also rider is stanleys canonical last name apparently so might as well use that instead of parable). A 26 year old whos fresh out of university n is working as an intern. Getting coffee, flowers for the office, making sure everyone has enough whiteboard markers since ppl use that up like crazy, etc

The two get close to the point that Stanley becomes Virgil's assistant. Which helps a bit since both Stanley and Virgil are struggling to keep up with their (seperate n now combined) workload.

The company makes a prototype product which is a set of yellow glasses, which gives the user access to the whole company's building, files, and technology in an AR form that they can access at the blink of an eye. The Prototype AR Accessible Biotech Launcher Enviroment (or pARable for short) They give it to Virgil to test, and research finds that it improves productivity 110%. However, the tech begins to backfire as it slowly begins to change Virgil's attitude and body. His mind starts to forget the people and names around him, he starts becoming increasingly more anxious and self conscious of his work when in the presence of an audience, his body begins to rapidly age and drain his life from him, and he begins to crave the control that he is given with these glasses.

Stanley notices this, and pleads with Virgil to stop, which he does. However, it causes them to fall behind on their workload, and the higherups dont like it.

Eventually, as the company threatens to dock their pay, Virgil is forced to use the glasses again in order to keep up with the workload and feed both him and Stanley. At which, Virgil begins to lose himself more and more. Forgetting his name and instead calling himself the Narrator.

The only person that he remembers is Stanley.

One night, Virgil doesn't come home, and after filing a missing persons case, Stanley doesn't find him. (Although the usual silence from Ouroboros seems more ominous than usual)

The company begins to export and send pARables en masse to all its employees, and the company reaches a terrifying peak in efficiency. And Stanley follows. Yet the only difference is that his pARable is different than his coworkers. Where everyone else starts off at a narration explaining the device followed by a room that is designed to look exactly like the user's own bedroom. Stanley's starts off with a story, in an office that looks suspiciously like his.

And concerningly, he can only vaguely remember of his life before the pARable.

And so the game plays out like normal, except both Stanley and The Narrator cant help but shake the fact that the other feels so familiar somehow.

---

ive got one page already done so i might do some more doodles with the designs i have for these two later, but im just glad i got to put this down since this is how i saw virgils origins to be subconsciously

which reminds me i need to share what ive got written for my tsp portal au f U C K

[thecynthh]

smart ass - M.S pt 2

synopsis - matt’s not doing to well with his schooling but is determined to get his degree and pass his classes. one essay which is a huge part of their grade haunts him with a bad mark, luckily y/n is willing to him him

notes - college setting, matt gets more attention ! not proofread!

authors notes - sooo i hope yalls like this, its shorter than i would like it to be but nonetheless its out! hope you guys like this one and i promise ill be updating again soon. also taglist soon! ill be asking who wants to be on it very soon and making an official intro and masterlist soon. thank you to everyone who enjoyed the first part of smart ass!

——————————————————————————

——————————————————————————

6:14 pm

friday night rolled around faster than i thought it would, i strip off my diner uniform laying down in my bed in just my undergarments. i lay out a large sigh letting myself melt into my bed. 

my phone buzzed beside me with a notification posted on my lock screen. 

Matt S 🐼 

8120 palace road 7 pm, see u soon :) 6:18 pm

i drop my phone back down, ill just close my eyes for a second, cus that shift really took it out of me. my eyes fell and a light sleep rushed over me. 

————————————————————————

10:17

buzz. buzz. buzz.

buzz. buzz. buzz. 

i swiftly sit up and hear the repetitive ring of my cell phone. i see many notifications from my multiple social media apps and from matt. oh shit. MATT! I completely forgot about him!  

Matt S 🐼

hey are u still coming over? 7:32pm

i know we agreed on 7 but if you need time just tell me 7:55

just get over here when u’re able too, please get here safe 8:57pm

oh shit oh shit oh shit. i quickly slip on some sweats and a baggy crew neck and grabs my school bag, im glad i thought about packing it before work today. i swipe up my laptop from my small desk and dash out the door. my car unlocks as i drop everything that was in my arms onto the seat next to me and step on the pedal getting there as fast as i possibly could. 

i see the outside of the larger house neighborhood and finally get to the house I was told to come too, pulling into the driveway. I see a silhouette of a man in one of the windows. 

i grab all of my belongings scrambling to the door, clicking the doorbell. I hear a melodic tune ring throughout the house. footsteps grace the front door as the door swings open. matt's eyes widen as they scan my body. 

He pushes the storm door open and says “oh you came.”

“im SO sorry matt, i came home after my shift and i ended up falling asleep on my bed because there was this mishap at the diner and i got blamed for it and i swear to god my boss is such an idiot and im so fed up with his bullshit.” i take a deep breath in “and then i know we agreed  again i fell asleep like a goddamn idiot.”

he just stared at me like i was the idiot, “im sorry is what i meant to say.” i continued 

he chuckles a little before stepping back slightly giving me space to enter, “hey its alright just come on in. follow me.” he says using his hand signaling to come along. 

we make it to a fairly large bedroom, i see a gaming setup squished onto a desk that was clearly not meant for housing gaming paraphernalia. “you can throw whatever we need onto the bed, we can just study there. and get comfortable. I know it's late but i'm still okay to stay up and we can even order coffee and some food as well if we get hungry. there’s not much in the fridge but chris’ soda if i’m being honest.”

“i’m alright for right now so let’s just get started on studying” i say to him.  

————————————————————————

1:29

“did you get that?” i ask matt after reviewing what we just went through. 

“yuuuup” he says with a smile, i noticed that his eyes squint when he smiles or laughs, its cute. i don't really think he got half of what i was saying but i think i got my point across.

“ i think it’s a good time to take a break, and plus we’ve been at this for 2 hours already.” i lay my head down against his plethora of pillows and just take a deep breath in. he copies me and comes falling down onto his bed.

i feel his weight shift as he reaches over for a remote to turn on the tv in front of us booting up netflix. moving down to his recently watched “brooklyn 99” begins to play as i hear the familiar voice of andy samberg talking. the theme song plays as i look over the boy beside me. 

“you like brooklyn 99?” i ask him with a furrowed brow pasted across my face. 

“god i love this show, every single episode.” he tells me looking back at me, his eyes stray from my eyes to my lips to my body. i didnt mind it to be honest, i kinda liked it if anything. 

I directed my sight back to the show. We sat in a comfortable silence but i couldn’t stay focused for long as my eyes wandered over to his sweats, then his hand near them. being fair he actually was pretty fine, i heard rumors before that he slept around a bit a year ago but it was old news quickly. 

as we near our third episode my eyes feel heavy and all my cares slipped away again as i drift off to sleep in his bed. 

————————————————————————

2:49

ugh, i wake up feeling incredibly hot. i rip off my sweater and dip underneath the covers, wow my sheets feel really nice, very fluffy…. 

[feelingpoorly]

Life lesson: avoid expired egg noodles

So I usually post whiny attention seeking shit like this on my insta bc even tho my kink does not apply to me at all, in some weird way complaining about how ill and knowing people would see it still kinda turns me on a little

But I figured what better place to whine about it here instead since, idk this is kinda what this blog is for

-

So we went to the shop last night and got a bunch of food from the reduced section. We do this fairly regularly cuz the expired food is so cheap and it’s usually fine if you eat it same day

Well I learnt my lesson lol. Amongst one of the things we got a couple packs of fresh egg noodles in some sauce. I didn’t really like them, but store bought is never gonna be as good as the real thing anyway right?

I was snacking on some cereal at like midnight, having eaten these noodles at like 7. I noticed that I was getting pretty severe stomach pain in the top of my stomach. It was weird and I didn’t really understand why. However I had taken some prescription painkillers earlier that day and although I take a different medication with them to try and stop this happening, they can have a habit of wrecking my stomach and giving me a tummy ache. I thought it was weird, since I definitely HAD remembered to take them with the other med this time, but whatever

Anyway I woke up this morning, we were going out to meet up with some of my partners friends for coffee. I immediately realised I felt bloated as hell, like painfully so. I figured it would pass once I was up and moving around.

It did not.

It pretty quickly progressed into pretty severe stomach cramps, to the point where every time I stood up, it would cramp so hard I couldn’t stop myself from kinda curling over and wincing. At that point I was starting to worry something was actually wrong and I wasn’t just a bit bloated.

I quite quickly started feeling pretty sick, and that’s panic territory for me, being emetophobic. I took a dissolvable anti sickness tablet, but the nausea combined with the horrible cramping made me feel very unwell. I really felt awful and sick and at that point I had to say to my partner, if I say I don’t feel well please can you just take me home. I didn’t know how I was gonna cope sitting in a coffee shop feeling like this. When the cramps hit I was in a lot of pain. Bearing in mind I live with chronic pain, I’m not a baby about pain, but this was the kind of pain that you just wince voluntarily and I couldn’t hide it.

Thankfully the anti sickness meds kicked in, and after sitting down for a while the nausea and the cramps settled down a bit to the point where I was no longer freaking out about being ill in public. I should probably add here that on the way there in the car, my stomach was making some really upset sounding deep rumbling gurgles. Like it didn’t sound good. The kinda gurgles that only come with being sick. I didn’t feel well enough to have a drink or anything to eat which probably looked a little suss. Later on a got just a bottle of lemonade hoping it would settle my stomach but when I sipped it, it just make it worse and my stomach started cramping again.

Skip to being home this evening, I’d thought the worse was over and I’d been feeling kinda ok. I had some light dinner, and what a fucking bad idea that was lol.

Im not having the intermittent intense cramps anymore but like, now my whole stomach feels bloated af again and I have like this sharp cramping pain kinda all over, both upper and lower stomach with just no relief. I’m so bloated my stomach is sticking out but there’s no relief from it at all. Holding my stomach helps but I feel so embarrassed so I’ve tried to hide it and only rub my tummy when my partner went to sleep.

What makes it worse, is that up until this point I had no idea what caused any of this. But when we got home, there was an absolutely rancid smell in the kitchen that smelt like off, rotting food. It was absolutely foul. It almost even smelt like vomit, and just smelling it made my nausea kick off all over again.

It was the leftover noodles. And let me tell you, they smelt pungent as FUCK. I literally ate those last night, and they smell that bad today? No wonder I’ve felt ill. I have that shit in my stomach. Even after my partner bagged up the leftovers, sealed it and put it in the bin, just the PLATE they were on is still emitting this foul smell, it’s just awful

Eating dinner was a bad choice, because now I just feel worse again. I don’t feel that sick anymore, probably because of the meds, but my stomach feels horrible again. I’m in so much pain, I can’t suck my tummy in at all with how sore and bloated and painful it is. I feel like an absolutely pathetic self indulgent lil bitch but I literally just went to make myself a hot water bottle to hold to my tummy as I try and sleep, because it hurts and this is not fun. I just want some relief, and currently nothing else is helping. As I’m lying here holding my tummy with one hand and holding the hot water bottle on it with the other, it’s gurgling and glugging really loudly sickly again and it just feels awful. I can literally feel it in my insides, and with the way it feels I just really hope it doesn’t all come back up again, probably still along with the undigested noodles from last night if the way I’m feeling is anything to go by 🥺

-

Anyway, I just came here to complain about it in way too much detail lmao. Hopefully someone enjoys my misery. As I said, although it’s embarrassing as hell, somehow the thought of other people knowing or being sympathetic etc is also kinda hot

If anyone wants to use my sorry ass as fic inspo then ofc you have my blessing lmao. In fact, if you do, PLEASE let me know as I’d love to read it haha

Anyway, off to moan quietly to myself and hold the hot water bottle on my aching tummy now x

[witchersmistress]

The begining of the end

this is part 1 of rainstorms and hate sex. im working on this series so it'll be jumbled for a little bit! @livesinfantasyland, this should answer some of your questions, im still working on the basement scene and ill post it as soon as i complete it!

Warning: the usual for my style

word count: 3k

As per usual my darlings, you do not have my permission to copy or use my work in anyway, if you do ill haunt you for the rest of your days!!

The slam of a fist jarred my attention. I looked away from Preston just a moment to see August walking away and he was seething. I eyed Preston and he just gave a knowsing smirk, “You stupid mother fucker” i spat as i set my coffee cup in the sink “You cannot use me to get to him” he gave that same cold indifferent mask that he wears so well along with a sly smirk “Who said i had to do anything? It seems he is working things out for himself” he takes a sip of his coffee and goes to leave. I grabbed his arm “ I don't not care what is going on between the two of you but leave me out of it i will not choose sides'' his blue-grey eyes look back at me “Funny it looks like you've already chosen the wrong side in this war” 

He walked away without another word. I went in search of August. Making my way to his corner office, I knocked on the door and opened it slowly, “August?” I questioned. His desk was empty, his decanter of whiskey wasn't in its usual place, it was on his desk next to a glass that was recently emptied, peeking around he clearly wasn't here. Backing my way out of his office I heard voices of two men I'd rather not deal with, Duke and Baron, the twins. Both of them are well over 6 feet, both are well built. Both with dark hair, Duke’s was shorter on the sides but the top was long and curled. He had a full sleeve of black and grey intricate tattoos on his left arm.

Baron, his hair was short all over. He didn't have any visible tattoos, and he had glasses, he was a master hacker, the rumors around the office were and Duke, he was just a man whore. I tried to walk away before they caught me “Wait up Cherry pie” , a lilting British accent called after me. Damn it, it was Baron. Rolling my eyes I turned to face him “What do you need?” leaning against the doorframe of August’s office “Nothing just seeing what you wanted with my brother? A little too close with him aren't we?” I took a step towards him, ready to give him a smack across his face. Clenching my fist and raising my arm “Easy dove, he goes to the shooting range when he is stressed, you'll find him there.” Duke spoke. I didn't say anything and walked away from them while I still could.

Taking the elevator down to the basement level, and making my way to the fire range, I can hear the gun fire from down the hall before I even walk in. grabbing a pair of ear plugs and glasses, I made my way. I can hear the muffled sound of my heels as I approach him. He has his suit coat hanging on the end of a hook. His broad shoulders tense underneath his dress shirt which is a little too tight, the powerful stance he held as he hit his target true. The sound of gun fire, muffled by my ear plugs, but still made me clench my thighs in anticipation. That man fucks like he fights, id be a goner. I stopped about 2 feet away from him. Not that i could scare him but i mostly don't trust myself to not reach out and touch him. “What do you want” i was at a lose for words, how the hell did that man tell i was there, was he fucking superman or something? He emptied the clip, he pointed to the top of his station, there was a mirror so he could see behind him. “You had no chance of sneaking up on me” he turned to face me, “Now are you going to tell me why you are here? I stuttered, positive that I looked like a dying cod fish.

He just glared at me with those striking blue eyes, waiting. Stuttering and stumbling over my words as if I was a young child learning to walk, he watched me with amusement, hooking his index finger under my chin, tilting it up to meet my gaze “Yes baby?” I let out a shuddering sigh and spoke softly. “I’m not involved with Preston, he is just an asshole” his lips quivered as he lowered his hand “ I know, i just can't stand the thought of that man touching what’s mine” he caressed my cheek softly, pulling his bottom lip between his sharp teeth. I looked into those blue eyes to see if I could read anything but that stupid mask was back in place and he was back to hard ass McGee.

Dropping his hand, he stretched his neck listening to it crack, he turned round and started to pack up. “Why do you hate him so much? Is he why you refuse to let me join the Swans with you” i blurted, plastering my false bravado on my face as he exhaled slowly “Baby none of that matters'' turning back to face me as he grabbed his suit coat “As long as he doesn't touch what's mine again we won't have problems. As for being a Swan, you’ll never be one'' buttoning his suit coat and grabbing his briefcase, watching his finely sculpted ass walk away, normally left me needy and wanting but I was hot for a different reason. I was angry, for the lack of answer and that man treating me with kid gloves. I've had it.

“August” i yelled as i followed him to his waiting vehicle “August Fucking Walker” i spat i could taste the venom in my mouth “you cant stop me from trying to join the Swans with or without you ill succeed” he let out a fake laugh “No you wont” i let out a harsh growl as he got to his SUV. stopping feet away from him, in a moment of rage i threw out at him the worst thing i could say “With an attitude like that, it's no wonder your twin sister left you” i swear the temperature of the room dropped by at least 20 degrees if not more. He turned to face me, he was seething with rage. “What did you say?” he spoke as he prowled towards me. Swallowing the hard lump in my throat, I dared to say it again as I went back into my car. “I said no wonder your twin..” but my words were cut off by a large hand grasping me round my throat, pinning me in place. I clawed at his hand to get him to let go. “You know nothing of my sister, you will never be the woman she would be.” he spat at me. He squeezed my throat to get his point across. At that moment I never feared him, even then but I was terrified of what he would do to me if he didnt let go.

August’s POV

 I had her pinned by her throat, the beast inside my chest just begging to come out to play, she couldn't just leave well enough alone. First all her questions about becoming a swan and then Preston hanging around her like a goddamn leech and now this sister jab, that was all I could handle today before I broke. Getting right in her face “Preston Darling, his brother is the reason my sister is gone, she died in her car in the backseat with that low life darling boy he called a brother. His family is the reason my sister is dead and I will never let him live it down. Ever wonder why he wears a half mask on his face?

Duke likes to play with fire just a little too much. I don't remember her like I do but I will remember the last words I ever spoke to her as she left the house wearing that necklace, the ones that declared she was a Darling whore. You are dead to me, and three days later she was.” her face was turning purple. Her hands clawed at my arms, drawing blood in a desperate attempt to release her. I shook the haze from my vision, dropping her like a sack of potatoes, stepping back watching her gulp down oxygen like she was guaranteed to never breathe again. She sputtered and choked as she rose to her feet. “You..Fucking..Asshole” she managed between breaths. I glared at her. She righted herself and came charging at me, her small fist hitting me in my chest “You.. Monster” she spat as she continued to pound away at my chest. The hits slowed before coming to a stop before she looked up at me, tears welling in the corner of her eyes. Swiping one away with my thumb and licking the salty tear off. Your tears tasted soo fucking good, i couldnt wait to get you to cry so more. Grabbing you by your biceps, I opened the back door of your vehicle and shoved you in.

Your POV

 Watching him licking my tears was something else. He grabbed me and spun me around to face his vehicle “August” I went to say before my words were abruptly cut off by his sharp tongue.

“Shut the fuck up, Baby,” he growls, yanking the back door of the truck open and stuffing me inside.

“It’s over. You lost. You’re not strong enough to take me down, and you never will be. Go home.” “Fuck you,” I yell. “I’m not giving up that easily.” I hurl myself back out, but he catches me, tossing me across the seat and jumping up in, blocking the way out. I reach for the other door, but he grabs my knees and pulls me back, and suddenly I’m on my back on the seat, and he’s yanking at my skirt. Tears of fury burn my eyes, and I twist away, but not before I see him yanking at his belt with his other hand. He flips me onto my back again and dives onto me, wrestling my thighs open and plowing into me. I cry out in fury, pounding at his shoulders as he buries his cock deeper, swearing at me as he grinds himself up to the hilt inside me. We’ve been fucking for over a month, but he’s so big it still hurts like fuck when he doesn’t prep me.

The fucked up part is, the pain is starting to turn me on as much as everything else he does. “Let me up,” I snarl. “You don’t deserve to fuck me after you choked me half to death.” “You crazy bitch,” he growls, gripping my hands and linking his fingers through mine, pinning them to the seat as he grinds his pelvic bone against my clit. “Is this what you wanted? Is this why you followed me? You need a good pounding to knock some sense into you?” A shudder of pleasure rocks through me, and I want to deny it, but he can feel how wet I am, so wet it makes me furious. “So what if it is?” I snap, bucking my hips, not sure if I’m trying to throw him off or push him deeper, push him over the edge, watch him lose control the way I love to do. “Why shouldn’t I?” “I told you what would happen if you ever disobeyed my rules,” he says, thrusting into me hard and fast, each movement punctuated by his harsh words.

“Is that what you wanted? You want me to watch my brothers wreck this sweet cunt like I do?” “You’d never,” I swear at him, my knees gripping his hips as I wrench at my hands, trying to free them from his grip. He only fucks me harder, pounding me into the seat like he’s trying to tear me in half. He bares his teeth in a feral snarl, but I don’t drop his gaze. I slam my hips up against his so hard I hope it leaves bruises, meeting each punishing thrust with my own. Last time, he told me he’d let his brothers run a train on me if I came over. But that was before. Things are different now. Maybe before I came along, he and his brothers did their thing to all the girls. But now he cares. And when he cares, August doesn’t share with anyone, not even his brothers. I know him well enough to know that. And he looks fucking pissed about it.

He grabs a handful of my hair, yanking my head back until I cry out, my body arching automatically, my knees spreading wider. He yanks my leg up with his other hand, hooking it around his hips, the force of his movements positively savage as he slams into me so hard I know I’ll have bruises on my hips tomorrow from where we collide, bruises on my leg from where his strong fingers bite into me, crushing my muscle until I cry out. “That’s right, baby,” he says, his voice coming in quick bursts between the crushing blows of his hips. “Let me hear you use that loud voice now. I know you want to. Let it out. Scream for me, Cherry Pie.” “I fucking hate you,” I snarl. “I hate you more.” “I’m so fucking close,” I say through panting breaths, my nails raking down his back. “Scream and I’ll cum so deep inside you that it changes your fucking DNA,” he growls.

 I drop my head back and let go, let myself scream all the fury and pleasure and frustration until all I feel is relief at the sensation of our bodies joining, even if we’re still warring with our hearts. August lets out a guttural groan, his cock throbbing thick inside me as he locks his hips to mine, forcing me to take every inch of him, every drop of his cum as it floods into me in a rush of wet heat. “Jesus fucking Christ,” he murmurs into my neck. “If I came any harder, I’d stroke out and die inside you.”

I shove at his shoulder. “Let me on top. I didn’t cum yet. And you better stay fucking hard while I do.” He rolls us over, sliding his big hands up my thighs and helping me find my rhythm. His eyes are so full, brimming with dark heat, that it just about devours me. I throw my head back, riding him while he grips my hip in one hand and slides the other up the front of my body. He wraps his fingers around my throat, his touch rough but not violent. His grip on my hip is punishing, but his hand on my throat is commanding but almost tender.

The contrast makes me come undone. My walls clench around him, the orgasm gripping me from head to toe, making me jerk on top of him uncontrollably, my body taking over. I know what he means about stroking out. Before him, I didn’t know it was possible to cum so hard. When the climax releases me, I collapse onto him, sliding my palms up his forearms to grip his hands the way he did mine, with my small fingers laced between his long, strong ones. “Holy fuck, I could watch you ride me until the day I die and never get tired of it,” he murmurs into my hair, kissing the top of my head. I catch my breath for a minute before sitting up and pressing his hands into the seat. “I think that was more than ten,” I say with a smirk. “What?” he asks, staring up at me in the darkness.

“I pinned you,” I say. “For ten minutes.” “Fucking snake,” he says, shoving me off him. I grab my skirt and slide over the console into the front seat, putting some distance between us before I pull on my clothes. “I told you I wasn’t done fighting,” I say. “I won't give up, August. It’s not in my blood.” “You’ll never be a Swan,” he says, pulling up his slacks and swinging down out of the truck. “Swans have class.” He slams the door and walks away, but I’m smiling when I turn the key. I completed the first challenge. Whether he wants to admit it or not, I did. Maybe I had to use some different tricks than the guys he’s used to initiating, but I still did it. And I’m going to keep passing all the tests until he has no choice but to let me join. If Mr. D thinks that’s where the secrets are, then he should be happy enough with my progress to let me keep my scholarship through whatever hazing period the society has. Now I just have to figure out what the next challenge is and hope I survive it.

[toomuchracket]

im so sick today but working from home and all i can picture is d word matty and assistant girl and him being so annoyed at her not taking any type of rest while she’s sick and hopped up on cold and flu meds having to concentrate twice as hard to get anything done (me right now)

oh i hope you're ok, get well soon!! and yeah, matty would be so exasperated with you for just insisting you're fine and continuing on with your work. thinking you wake up on a wfh day and you're quite wan and feeling a bit more tired than normal - matty's immediately concerned, but you're like "it's ok it's the end of the financial year it's just so busy and it's catching up with me i'll be fine after a coffee". and matty's like "ok whatever you say babe", and you do perk up a tiny bit after caffeine so he lets you be, but resolves to keep a closer eye on you than he normally would on a mutual wfh day. you start off work alright, but you plod into the kitchen after about an hour and a half to ask "have we got any soluble paracetamol? think i'm getting a pressure headache"; matty gets you the meds, squinting at you as he passes them over, and says "sweetheart if you're not feeling great you should rest. phone jamie and tell him you're taking the day off", but you're furiously shaking your head (and wincing in pain at it) like "no it's fine i'm fine there's too much to do for me to phone in sick", and you thank him for the meds and go back to your laptop. matty sighs, but he leaves you to it because you're so stubborn - that is, until the sneezing starts shortly after, at which point he brings you a lemsip and some cold and flu tablets (and a kiss on the head). and he sits at the desk with you - you wrapped in his hoodie, your big cardigan, and a blanket - while you sneeze your way through responding to emails, periodically glancing up from his lyric notebook to check you're alright. the final straw for matty is watching you take fifteen minutes to mentally process a one-sentence reply, blinking hazily at the screen while you sneeze repeatedly; he's like "my darling, i love you, and i love how focused and hardworking you are, but you really can't work when you're like this. let me call jamie, please", and he can tell you're ill because you open your mouth as if to argue and then just deflate like "alright". so he calls jamie, holding the phone to you so your boss can hear how awful your sneezing is, and sorts that, then scoops you up and carries you to the bathroom like "c'mon, let's shower" - you're slightly delirious from the flu meds like "mmm no too tired to fuck right now", and matty's like "no of course not sweetheart, we'll get all cleaned up and then go back to bed, hopefully sleep it off, yeah?", and you nod into his chest like "mhmm". and that's what you do - shower, sleep, snuggle, matty also making sure to take meds so he doesn't get ill as he strokes your hair and stays with you to help make sure you get better <3

[boomboomcat]

CHAP 12 — wanna kiss

summary SUNGHOON, your roommate, flirts with you a lot. you end up catching feelings for him, but he has a lot of people who like him. you're not even sure if he likes you back, but you two spend a lot of time together and are friends in general. will you be able to steal sunghoon's heart?

warning cliche and cringe YUCK 1 swear word

written + smau

wc 345(?)

"hey, pretty im done moving your stuff, you wanna hangout or do you wanna unpack first?" sunghoon says from the livingroom, you were getting something to drink. "lets hang out!! the dorm has so much space." you said, looking around, walking to the living room, finding him already sitting down on the couch. "lets get some snacks! ill go get a blanket" running to the bedrooms.

when you came back, you already smell popcorn. you both set up the snacks and drinks on the couch, "whatre we watching?" getting comfy, sunghoon put his arm on the head of the couch, "hmm lets watch this" clicking on the movie, you put the remote down to watch.

about 2 hours later, you woke up from sleeping on his shoulder. "morning, sleeping beauty, you fell asleep about 50 minutes in the movie." "omg, im so sorry. did i make you uncomfy?" "not at all." you stared at the coffee table trying to recharge your energy "hey, this is boring wanna kiss?" you turned to him in shock "what?" "what?" "what did you say?" "d'you wanna kiss?- im kidding. lets go to bed?" "wait.. i want to." grabbing his arm, "what?" "what? i mean yeah lets sleep.." standing up, oh my god. that was so embarrassing and awkward, what the hell.

you went to your room but heard the door open, you thought you didnt close the door properly, so you went to close it. only to be met by sunghoon. "WHAT THE FUCK SUNGHOON YOU SCARED ME" holding onto your chest dramatically, you heard him laugh "sorry, i just wanted to say goodnight" you went to sit on my bed, "you couldve just messaged me.." looking at your phone that was charging, "well, were roommates, whats the point of that?" thats true. "okay goodnight! sweet dreams pretty." that nickname always makes your heart flutter, "goodni-" sunghoon leans down to kiss your forehead, you were in shock. "ill go now, see you tomorrow, pretty." he goes to his room. "what the fuck"

"OH SHIT HAERINS GONNA BE SO MAD"

prev — mstrlst — next

an cringiest thing ive ever wrote

taglist (open, bold=cant tag) @run2min @belovedxiao @nicryo @moonlighthoon @curly-fr13s @tinydeerwasteland

[bambidoll96]

Writing out a fantasy, it might prove embarrassing or off putting to some but inneed to at least get it out:

Im just gonna say it plainly. I want to be a pornstar... but i want to do it my way. Im not here to fuck; suck? maybe occasionally but thats not the point.

I want to do long and intimate scenes: elaborate ropings with a focus on each individual wrap or knot, as well as highlighting any banter between me and my rigger; Impact scenes that could double for toy infomercials that cary into at least the first round of aftercare and maybe more. Sensation scenes blending the tickling and overstim with soft teddybear cuddling, and as much dialogue as i can reply to in such a state; bob ross esque body art paintings; recorded hypno sessions, even if im mostly asleep and not moving much im sure there is a real appeal somewhere (Heck pull bambi out and let her do her own scenes... i am honestly curious how much interest there might be in letting my wider plurality come into play?)

everything ive actually tried with another person outside of Sex sex has been heavenly (yes even the really really dumb "coffee" date) and there is a growing desire/need to be seen (or especially to be shown off) rising within me.

Sure cut the it down for pornhub or wherever so it can make the money but also do the long cuts that actually show off the art of the scene for those who actually appreciate it.

I want to work with a variety of tops and maybe with time get comfortable acting as a top myself(maybe, not sure if ill enjoy it in the long run) i want to explore as many kinks as i can find and experience them as much as my body/mind/spirit can handle. Maybe "owned" collectively by a small group, maybe with a single main partner who ensures i always make it home in one piece. Definitely in some way in which i am truely safe and secure, and done as sanely as possibe; with partners who genuinely care about my consent and wellbeing

For now i know damn well im still inexperienced enough and uneducated enough that that level of commitment wont really be possible any time soon even if there is any slim hope that it might be in the future. I also know that building the kind of social/support network to actually get anywhere near even the city that the ballpark is in is going to be a persuit that will likely span the rest of my life.

Yes right now i am no where near stable enough to even look for a real foothold and i know the entire wall is at an acute angle (especiallyconsideringi really dont want to work the camera, editing booth, or goddess forbid the distro/business side. But i have gotten a taste and i know it really is something i think i want to seriously persue once i am able; even as so many of my existing connections tell me its just a fantasy and seem to indicate that its just not possible.

Theres just something in my soul that calls out for it, even if we dont really know how "it" might happen or how "it" might pan out in the long, long run (maybe growing into a mentor as my body becomes less able to do the scenes myself) but we genuinely do want to make an earnest attempt.

[triptych-of-voids]

I love your medic headcanons so much I need to hold you (and him) so gently!! If you don't mind, could you share more headcanons for him if you have any?

thank you!! i have so many things i could say about him that its sort of ridiculous and if i were to talk about every one of my headcanons then we would be here all month but yes, i will be happy to share a couple more. if anyone wants something more specific theyll have to ask for it though x]€

going under the cut again just in case it gets long <<

ill get the obvious one out of the way first because i keep saying it but this guy is definitely trans. you have to trust me because im always right and i just know. hes gender

medic is definitely a caffeine addict, this guy loves coffee and will drink it at any given opportunity. he likes tea as well but nothing is as satisfying as coffee. the way it smells is great, tastes great and highly customizable, excellent to have with chocolate or pastries, and he likes the way it makes him feel. hes trying to figure out why he can down a whole pot of coffee and still fall asleep, yet his body does seem to have some sort of a reaction to it? results pending

speaking of food and drinks, hes got a bit of a sweet tooth. he loves sugar (in moderation of course, but you wont catch him turning down a slice of cake every now and then). however he doesnt like anything TOO sweet. certain kinds of frosting or desserts are just ridiculously sugary and paired with his sensory issues some sweets would be a little unbearable. i think one time sniper offered him some fairy bread and he felt nauseous. other than that though, generally speaking he loves various pastries and candies and especially chocolate. hed be a big fan of the cherry + chocolate combination and, again, anything involving coffee.

he gets bored super easily. medic likes to have his whole day planned out and always needs to be doing something, even if its something small, otherwise hes pretty convinced he might actually genuinely die of boredom. you cant leave him alone without an Activity for too long or hes going to start thinking about killing people (he thinks about killing people a lot actually.... but thats besdies the point).

last one, just because i could genuinely keep going for hours but i have to stop somewhere, he loves going on long walks out in the middle of nowhere. he invites the other mercs to come with him from time to time but theyve all learned by now that when he says hes taking 'a short walk' he really means that they wont be back at base for at least another hour or two minimum. he likes keeping track of the best paths, bird watching, and collecting cool things he finds along the way