#im just trying to reason to you why i couldve thought they all were really similar.. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

hanasnx · 4 months

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no yeah i need more of the indy x beef love story!! add a cut if you have to (jokey joke i'm not trying to nag) i've got a cup of ice water and a bowl of popcorn beside me (also a joke. the popcorn, not the ice water. it is toasty rn) i'm invested, i'm seated, i'm tuned in!! much love xoxo

part one sorry this took so long

i had this sense of belonging with him. i was already comfortable with him even though we'd only had a handful of conversations. this was a big step for me seeing as how i'd only ever been with people that gave me that thrill in my stomach especially if i was doing something wrong. in this case, that thrill was completely gone, replaced with a sense of safety i'd never felt before besides a friendship that was very dear to me. so i thought i needed to be his friend. i wanted to hang out with him.

i think i decided this when i went out walking late at night because its my favorite thing to do and it started pouring rain so i went to the little mailbox garage to keep my phone/earbuds dry otherwise i wouldnt have minded the rain. but i was sitting there and i found myself wanting to run into him. i was wishing he'd, for some reason, come check his mail so that we could talk more.

now that its decided that i knew i wanted to be closer to him, i did not have a game plan. instead, i applied the logic i usually would apply to this situation: if it's meant to be it'll come back. because i was too scared to make a move when he came in for coffee in the morning. we said our usual hellos etc but i did not give him my number. i was disappointed, even though it was my own fault, because its rare that i see him twice in one day. so the "if it's meant to be it'll come back" was kind a way out for me, 1) i wouldnt have to do the thing i was dreading, creating a sense of relief 2) but that would mean i dont get to do the thing i wanted to do, creating a sense of disappointment.

i was working all day and my boss left early, which means that when i went home for lunch, i put on non-corporate dress code socks because my feet were cold. ones that her micro-managing ass would've noticed and told me to take off. but i was behind the desk, it was nearing the end of the day, no one would notice my crazy socks. my coworker that knew i liked this guy was sitting next to me, and my head maintenance guy who didnt know and could not know. we were all talking when beef came in.

like i said before, it was rare to see him twice in one day, so my stomach did a flip. it meant i had to give him my number, i made that commitment. i wrote it down on a sticky note, waiting for my chance. but my maintenance guy wouldnt leave, and beef was making his coffee. i was running out of time. i didnt know how to find a situation to give it to him in which my maintenance guy wouldnt see it because i knew his ass would report me or hold it over my head. and beef left before i could figure it out.

crestfallen, i hadnt fulfilled my commitment. i was really upset with myself, it was perfect. he came back just like he was supposed to, just like the mantra. if it's meant to be it will come back.

i was beating myself up for it tbh. "you always do this shit, indy, you always do this shit." which is so rare considering how kind i am to myself, which goes to show just how upset i was at myself for not manning up about it.

some time passed and it was probably the last thirty minutes of the day, so i was gonna go put the golf cart back. i was walking out when something told me to go back to my desk, so i went back, and i grabbed the sticky note with my number on it. to this day i have no idea why i did that. something came over me that i went back to my desk and grabbed the sticky note with my number on it to shove into my pocket to take with me. maybe it was because i didnt want other people to see it on my desk, but i couldve just thrown it away.

i drive around and i go the longways because i usually did that. its about evening time, the sky is orange, im still upset over earlier.

and i see in the distance a familiar silhouette. one i've seen a thousand times. it was beef roller blading alongside his running dog. i cant believe my eyes it was like magic. i was genuinely, to my core, shocked. a third time. a third time in one day.

he goes to the sidewalk to let me pass, but i turn in to a parking spot like a mad man. i am determined to get this over with. a third time in the same day, ive never seen him three times in one day, this had to be it. i have to give him the number and miraculously i brought the fucking note with me. i march up, i say "hi (name), hi (dogs name)" quick asf. "dont look at my socks" i tell him because im still wearing the crazy socks that dont go with my shoes or outfit and the first thing he fucking does is look down at my socks. he laughs at them. i hand him the note "call me if you wanna hangout sometime." i say and get back in the cart to take it to the garage.

an hour later he texts. "hi :) this is (name)" and we text for hours. paragraphs about our pasts and shows we like and what we do for fun, everything. at one point he texts that he feels like he needs to say that hes "not ready for a relationship, and hes happy being friends" and i said "thats fine because thats why i gave you my number. to hang out" which is true. i asked him if he wanted to go around the community yard sale on thursday with me, and he said yes.

around 11 o clock that day, we meet up, and i remember he looked me up and down. he gave me that scan. it was subtle but i was like oh?

we walked around together and i got a bunch of stuff for my roommates cats and a lemon soap dispenser for my roommate who loves lemons etc. beef hasnt gotten anything, but he helps me carry my stuff :) he had insisted on it. at one point we come across a collection of framed paintings, and he looks particularly taken with a small portrait of a snowy landscape with a man in furs. he sets it back down. i check the price, its $5 so i buy it for him. he looks touched.

we text a little for the next week, but he says hes really busy with work and has to focus on that so i give him that space. at one point i subtly try to hang out with him late at night using the excuse of putting our crystals out for the full moon, and he says that he'd love to but can't, and i had to backtrack and act like i wasnt trying to hang out 💀

towards the end of that week, i had started texted with an ex-best-friend of mine we'll call her EBF. ebf invited me to a kava bar, then asked if her boyfriend could come, i said no that makes me uncomfortable bcos i dont know her boyfriend, she says "oh then i cant go", im like wow i wonderrr why we stopped being friends u pos but whateverrr so i said "if you get to bring someone, i get to bring someone" and invited beef. i said "hey i know its short notice but im going out tonight at a kava bar you should come" he says "great! give me the address ill be there" so i do. while im getting ready, EBF texts to cancel last minute. fucking dick n balls, right? so i had to text beef to be like "hey man so sorry but my friend cancelled. do you still wanna go just us?" and he says yea :)

he picks me up and at one point i pay a compliment to myself, i say i've got nice curves. he looks at me while hes got a spare moment driving and gives me a little once over again... and says "yeah, you do have nice curves" i couldve died

we talk about anything and everything on the way here, at the kava bar, and then when we take a walk. we walk up and down that strip for like an hour and a half. we drive back to the community and we take another walk. when i look at my phone after all this walking and talking it realize its 2am and we started hanging out at 7pm. so i have to run back home bcos ive gotta get ready for work in 6 hours.

the next day my roommates rly wanna meet him, so invite him over to hang with them. after that, i walk him home, and spent a bit of time with him there. i tell him im cold, and he says "heres my favorite hoodie". i go home and spend a few hours apart at my place. we keep texting, and he says "let me know if you wanna play some games tonight" as in like online, but i was like "im literally packing up my ps3 to bring over rn" bcos he had mentioned he wanted to play black ops 2 and i was feeling spontaneous. around midnight im back at his place and we play games until way later, and im feeling too tired to keep playing so we put on a movie and we "cuddle" which was kind of spooning but he kept his crotch away from my ass. (he tells me later that the reason he did that was because he got a boner laying down with me)

we fall asleep watching rio, our first sleepover. he had set an alarm for me so that i wouldnt miss work and i didnt even ask.

the next day he asked me to come over again. he cooks me dinner. we have another sleepover. i got to work, and then i go right back to his place. that night we're sitting and facing one another in the dark, that invisible string is pulling us together. he's murmuring, "i don't wanna be friends. i wanna be your boyfriend." and we kiss. its soft and slow, and it marks may 7th our anniversary.

since our first sleepover, i did not sleep again at my own place, which means that before we were officially dating, we were technically living together first.

#🥩 beef tings #indy lore #indy shoots the shit #thanks for the msg!!#anon

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iratusmus · 1 year

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Hii, I read that freakishly looong (but interesting) take on Fiona

Personally, I think the major problem for her in the comics was that she wasnt really of major importance to the writers. I think the writers thought of her as interesting at first then got bored of her and she was lost to the wind.

I think thats where the problem started.

Secondly, I think the freedom fighters were also at fault. I think they forgot that not everyone has the mental capacity to be a hero. Not exactly good person but I think they expected too much of Fiona. Im not saying this in a degrading way tho. I mean, she went through a lot and they expected her to be healed already, they expected her to suddenly see them as heroes and want to be good. They forgot that not everyone has that inclination. They expected too much and I think that also got her overwhelmed.

Im not sure if this makes sense but yeah this is my take on it.

its pretty clear that bollers and penders didnt have much investment in her character at all, but also that that point she was really just a tangentially relevant side character. like i said in my post, frankly before ian gave her a corruption arc she didnt really have much to offer in the first place. you cant really fault the writers all that much because she wasnt really meant to be of major importance. when ian took the helm as main writer he clearly thought she had potential as a character and utilized that through the corruption arc. she wasnt "lost to the wind", she just became a villain and, as such, didnt need to be on the main screen all the time. archie sonic has a lot of villains and it would be honestly a bit annoying if we spent all of our time with just a handful of them - theyre great characters and should be used accordingly! yeah she took a bit of a backseat in the "scourge+fiona+ss go to mobius and get whacked for it" arc, but like. come on they were clearly setting something up here

she comes back in journey to the east and is pulling together her own gang there, and then comes back in full swing in scourge lockdown, in which they were. also. clearly setting something up

the plan according to ian is i believe that scourge & fiona were gonna have an epic breakup and she'd take the destructix in the divorce, which tracks plenty enough with the setup that was being put in place.

also, honestly im gonna have to partially disagree with you on the second point. its a complicated situation and i think youre simplifying it a bit too much. fiona willingly chose to "become a hero" - its not like they made her. she literally couldve left at any point in time to just be a normal civilian (which is... literally what mina did. nobody had an issue with it, even though mina's superspeed wouldve been a massive aid in battle. she wasnt equipped to be a hero in that way because, like you said, that kind of life really isnt for everybody).

also, the freedom fighters frankly cant be everybody's personal therapist - theyve all got so much baggage themselves and they cant even address that because theyre all in the middle of a war 😭 i dont think its that they expected too much of her - id say its much more in the direction of that they didnt even really consider what she went through or how it wouldve affected her in the first place. its less that she got overwhelmed and more that she was functionally an outsider who had no support system and no friends to stick up for her or try to really make her feel like she was one of the team - not out of malice or anything, but just because nobody really ever thought about it in the first place.

overall its just a really messy situation and while fiona made the bad choices that she did of her own volition, there were real reasons behind why she made those decisions in the first place

#ask #cldvebeenlola #archie sonic #fiona fox #SORRY FOR GOING ON FOREVERRRRRRRRR 😭🙏 i just have . incredibly specific opinions on the Fiona Situation

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chloeangelic · 9 months

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thoughts re: Rendezvous series and forgiveness

ive had some thoughts recently about how people might react to part 5 of rendezvous when it comes out, ie the final part, and i wanted to share for no real reason

discussions about forgiveness, infidelity and such below the cut

firstly, i want to say that zero iteration the word "forgive" appears in part 5. there is no discussion about forgiveness really at all, and i dont think there needs to be. one of the reasons is that i think the concept of forgiveness can oversimplify complex situations, as well as assign unnecessary value judgments to things. i often feel like being forgiven for something means that you have to label that thing as 100% bad and terrible, and theres no space for what sort of positive change it couldve initiated. this is often the case when it comes to infidelity - which is a whole different can of worms.

on the topic of forgiveness, however, whether its mentioned explicitly or not, ive noticed an extreme allergy to joel being forgiven for any indiscretions towards the MC in fics on this website. it seems like the MC herself can do anything and nobody really questions it when joel takes her back, we can cuck tommy into oblivion, joel can cheat on his wife etc, and all of that is cool and hot and encouraged until joel is the one making dumb decisions. people will literally forgive him for being a mass murderer but not for fucking someone else.

the discussions of morality, which are a huge focus in tlou, seem to stop short when it comes to fictional relationships between joel and MCs. we can all discuss why he merked that hospital full of fireflies, and most tlou fans will justify his actions, saying he did it for a good reason, but any relationship related indiscretions do not get the same treatment. i understand that people are sensitive about cheating, being cheated on is awful, but its unproductive to shut down all discussions about it

just to make it clear: i do not consider his actions in rendezvous cheating, not on katy and not on the MC. the MC feels more cheated on because she has an unhealthy attachment to him

am i defending his actions in rendezvous? no. do i think they need to be defended or condemned? also no. i choose not to see things as binary good/bad - even if i thought everything he did was terrible, whats he supposed to do? be alone forever because of indiscretions towards one person? i know this is fic, and i could write him living under a rock for eternity if i wanted, but this is supposed to be a realistic (in my definition) series, and realistically, thats not what happens to people who fuck up in interpersonal relationships. they move on and live their lives. we all hurt people at some point - its juvenile and delusional to think that just because someone hurt another person, theyre bound to suffer for all eternity.

i think there are a lot of nuances when it comes to relationships especially, and trying to label what hes doing in this series as cheating on the MC/katy, and then saying CHEATING BAD is an oversimplification and ignores the scope of emotion im trying to cover here. even calling it cheating ignores the depth of unlabeled relationships. i think the MC deserves more than that, cause if we say hes cheating on katy, were basically calling the MC the other woman, and the other woman is ALWAYS vilified - except in this case where shes the "reader" character. what if i wrote this entire thing in a different perspective, and katy was the reader?

im in the brainstorming stages of my next big series after love me back, and if i go with the idea thats simmering in my head right now, its gonna be a completely infidelity focused series, about when its acceptable to cheat, who is allowed to cheat and why, etc. joel will not be fucking anyone else in that series or cheating on the MC calm down

this might not be very interesting, and its not addressed to any anons in particular at all, ive just been thinking about it as the parts have been posted and thought id share my thoughts in case anyones interested. its hard to give my full thoughts without spoiling ch 5, so after thats posted i might write another reflection on it for anyone whos interested in my thought process behind the decisions ive made.

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livecharliereaction · 2 months

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gonna be a long ahh post

ill try to see if theres anything strange for all of them but i dont remember all alibis n circumstances etc im using the red truths + question arc tip screen oki thats all i have Well i have my liveblogs too but that doesnt seem useful. first ep didnt have red truths yet but im quite sure it had to have been natsuhi or maria so

this was natsuhi + krauss + eva + hideyoshi + rudolf + kyrie

rosas definitely weird in ep2 i very vividly recall her BEING in that chapel too but i could be misremembering that part. though beatrice was there

this whole ordeal was a little strange i wish i remembered who exactly witnessed her bcs i feel like it wasnt just natsuhi n servants... Kyrie definitely saw her yes? I dont know what to make of it. What a cute outfit though shes so cute

also these mentions on shannon n kanon ep2 descs Awh

kanons key or servant involvement seeing as none of the others were first 6

kanon n jessica couldve killed each other Why? Who knows But someone carried kanons body out

"no one is hiding (regarding jessicas room)" STop i wouldve said that too im just like him i cant diss his abilities anymore.

Oh but also "kanon was killed in this room" =/= "kanon was killed in this room at that time" Im thinking about the scene where he "reappears" again i think its been said theres no disguise stuff so maybe

am i confusing the scenes because "theres no corpse" What happened in the doctors room???? when they saw him come back and bury his fingers to that wound i wouldve said he mightve died at that moment but then whats with the corpse. Girl

i miss her so much shes so funny "You are incompetent" in red is crazy

Beato:(.......

rosa had the keys yeahhhhhh i dont exactly remember Why i thought she was weird at the time but it was probably her. She was running around w the rifle too Well thats all for ep2 anyway

wtf even was charumi3 that was evas time to shine yes

Its definitely dead

None of the six committed suicide! hmm the weird linked one i remember it Though. Isnt "The six died instantly" incorrect in kinzos case if he was already dead... Since its a separate statement it doesnt have to refer to those six yes?? So maybe one of them besides kinzo didnt die instantly... Like battler suggested w a chain murder or one person going around to make up the chained rooms

Then theyd have a key too... girl i dont remember what eva was doing at this time also

at that point eva was supposedly in her room w a headache while witch eva was killing them so yeah doesnt look great for eva That servant things still possible too + rosa might as well have killed maria though idk who killed rosa in that case

eva did not kill hideyoshi... servant thing still strong and also wtf was kyrie thinking here anyway might as well blame her n then say eva killed kyrie but i forgor where eva was here again oopsie

"No life forms other than humans have any connection to this game" seems like a witch denying phrase but ok i guess its not a life form then

Lol. Once again kinzo thing makes this not matter... Though there go all my servants dawg maybe that was only for first twilight then

that is worrying. Do you think kanon n shannons names being pseudonyms affects the red truth. "shannon is dead" What if shannon is the idea of her servitude to the family and she threw it away for some reason and that way theres a Sayo who is killing people and doesnt really break the truths "shannon is dead" OR "there are no more than 18 humans on this island" All that goes for kanon too im just pretending that i didnt spoil myself his real name haha. Well kanon even more so since they made him appear and all but that couldve been jessicas delusion too...

she used to have so much fun that beato...

also even if eva was confirmed to not be involved in nanjos death that doesnt negate she couldve done well.everything else heart

thought about "Because of your sin, people die." a lot yesterday... The part about it not being about or with beatrice is of course very confusing and weird But yeah i cant even guess except apparently hes the reason the game exists? Or at least the reason it goes on or more specifically "cause of the eternal torture between us"

I dont understand how it could be about anything else BUT beatrice but ok. Maybe he was mean to maria like ange. But maria was literally 3 years old at that point... I guess he left the family 6 years ago but im having a terrible time trying to understand whats wrong with that really I guess asumu isnt blood related to him afterall but it cant be this great big sin beefing with rudolf u know. Id think his comebacks the reason the cerenomy was seen fit to be carried out (thinking about the amount of people) but angie wouldve normally been there instead of him anyway so the amount of people is the same and its over 14 anyway (13 sacrifices + whoevers imitating the epitaph) so i dont really understand blinks

i like when he goes Ah ngagh nnnghhh aaghh...!!! this vn loves to make people roar also They do it all the time. battler n beato do it the most but eva and many others always roaring too

also??? according to the wiki they didnt use red truth at all in ep3 until this point thats crazy i guess beato really WAS more careful about it

oh ange i miss u

i cant even tell what the first ones about theres no game record in ep4 tips how annoying <- doesnt remember at all what happened. Well ange was there uhh.

nvm its definitely about this one. I seriously remember nothing there was so much ange ange ange it was all eyes on ange.... I might reread my liveblogs

OH YEAH it was ppl supposedly witnessing kinzo killing everyone. Although uh "all ... acknowledged the presence of kinzo" Thats very different from "kinzo was there n killed everyone"... It couldve been in spirit or even if his corpse was there. Also last ones crazy u can just change that well i guess they were counting a corpse then

thats crazy confusing combined with knoxs rule about no accidents... what is left...

STOP. THERE GO BOTH OF MY SUSPECTS STOP IT

none of these negate kanon n rosa culprit yeah?

omfg wtf theres an image limit let me do the rest in another post

#charumi5

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partytricks · 3 months

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young royals s3 thoughts (SPOILERS!!!!)

- first and foremost i think they tried to fit waaaayy too many things into this season. it feels like they wrote two seasons worth of content and instead of trying to cut plotlines that were unimportant to the overall narrative, they just said fuck it lets do them all. and it...did not work

- LOVE the idea of wille's speech having repercussions outside of wilmon and the royal family, and i love that the hazing was addressed, but again the whole reveal about erik and august felt like it was just thrown in to have sympathy for august and to lead to wille's breakdown at the bday dinner (which like...he had more than enough reason to do already). i do like the idea of erik actually being fucked up behind the scenes, but i wish they would have hinted at it in season 2 or something instead of just dropping it out of nowhere. idk

- WHY DOES IT FEEL LIKE THEY FORGOT ABOUT WILLE HAVING ANXIETY AND PANIC ATTACKS UNTIL THE LAST COUPLE EPISODES???? his anxious habits and the physical toll that stress takes on him were pretty consistently shown in the first two seasons and then suddenly not a thing until the halfway point???????? like idk something about that really bothered me. my one big hope for this season was that wille would get to address his panic attacks but it seems like theyre just not gonna acknowledge it, which i guess is true to real life anxiety it's just something you live with, but it was teased to be such a crucial thing about wille that im a little disappointed its not getting explored

- wilmon cannot communicate to save their lives and i feel like neither of them are ready to be in a relationship. they have a good dynamic and you can tell they care about each other, but they never look at issues from a dual perspective, only as an individual. and then when they call each other out they just get defensive. i think they only want the lovey dovey fun part of a relationship, and they cant accept the fact that things WILL go wrong and they have to work through it TOGETHER

- ive seen a lot of people say that wille got really mean out of nowhere this season and i kind of disagree?? yes, his aggression is def at the forefront of almost all his scenes, but we've seen in the past two seasons that he doesnt know how to deal with stress and takes frustration out on other people. it's just that now he's constantly stressed and therefore on a hair trigger. is it right of him?? no. but does it make sense?? yeah, for me at least

- i HATE that wille's anxiety is constantly pushed aside because it "isnt princely" but the MINUTE that kristina has mental health issues she gets to step back from her duties and see a therapist, get meds, etc... now to clarify, i hate it because wille deserves better and its so hypocritical. i LOVE that it was included in the story because you really get to see plain as day just how much wille's family does not give a shit about him. he was so worried about his mom because he knows what it feels like and wants to be there for her when she never was for him, but she cant even make eye contact with him. and his dad is no better. that scene where wille calls to ask about erik and his dad just goes "yeah i cant think of any of erik's flaws he was perfect" EVEN IF YOU THINK THAT YOU DONT SAY IT TO YOUR OTHER KID???? who, to wille's point, is CURRENTLY YOUR ONLY SON.

- simon dealt with a lot of shit this season, and he was right to be scared of wille during his blowup at the royals, but CALL ME CRAZY i think he couldve waited until like, idk, the NEXT DAY?? to breakup with him???? yes, wille has been an ass to simon this season and taking family drama out on him, thats not cool, but striking while the iron is hot is an AWFUL idea. bring it up while wille is in a more rational headspace and not as riled-up. like simon my bby i was with you til then

#young royals spoilers #young royals #young royals season 3 #uhhhh if i think of more ill add it

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genderqueerdykes · 1 year

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im intersex and transmasc/a trans man and ive questioned being transfem as well, but its so hard for me to feel i can claim that when i dont present femininely very often and my connection is mainly to femininity itself, with womanhood its complicated... im definitely intergender and feel it's likely i'm trans because of having hyperandrogenism, i feel i may be a woman otherwise and have always felt connection to womanhood just without *being* a woman, its just not what happened for me (#complicated trans intersex things), i just always yearn for womanhood even though i just know deep down its not for me and never couldve been bc of being intersex, it just wouldnt have ever felt right. personality wise still i am very feminine, more feminine than masculine, very into feminine things/have very predominantly feminine interests, so all these things make me feel connection to the transfem label but i end up feeling like since i don't ever really look feminine that often and it's unclear to me if i'm considered to have a feminine gender (gender is a mess) that i can't claim the label (honestly since then i think i don't experience transmisogyny very often and some say that's a requirement to be transfem)

so lost on it, any time i tried calling myself transfem i felt like a fake and that if people saw how masculine i am that they would call me a fake (honestly i dont even know if that would happen if that itself would be considered transmisogyny for someone like me since i do identify as a transmasc too and im more masculine now because of being on testosterone even though it is as significant as it is because of the hyperandrogenism... Idk if it counts as transmisogyny towards a transfem intersex person when its partly from being on testosterone even tho it wouldnt show up as strongly if you were perisex, yknow. more complications sigh)

so there's a lot of nuance to being intersex, and i totally understand why you're so confused and lost, because that's where i'm still at right now, so don't feel bad at all

it can take a very long time to kind of unwind that you're not perisex and that perisex logic doesn't apply to you. it doesn't really matter if you're "more" feminine than masculine, honestly, sometimes that makes it harder for intersex people, because when you have more subtle masculine features, people often think you are a transfeminine person attempting to hide those features due to dysphoria or trying to pass. it's very annoying, people are invasive in ways that aren't necessary

afab intersex people are often denied our femininity wholesale due to our masculine features. i was told i wasn't a "real girl" and i couldn't do things like wear makeup, for example, without getting absolutely ridiculed for no reason by my peers. i was also ridiculed for carrying a purse, or wearing feminine clothing. i was told i was "too manly to be a girl" because of my face shape, the slope of my shoulders, the flatness/sagginess of my chest, and my beard/mustache and body hair. i wasn't a guy either though, because i had a high pitched voice and a very obvious hourglass figure, so people just couldn't seem to figure out exactly what they wanted out of me. i was ridiculed into chest binding because people thought me wearing any other type of bra was me "trying to be a girl".

it's very confusing and it's a hard place to exist in in life. i think perisex people just don't really quite get how hard it is to exist as an intersex person. our experiences are so unique that you really can't apply any other logic to it other than our own specific situations. every intersex person is different as well.

if you find yourself relating to this, then it sounds like you experience a transfeminine intersex experience. keep in mind that it doesn't really matter what your agab is due to how you've been treated and if you've been denied the ability to identify as feminine or female in some way due to your agab, it is a transfeminine experience. it's just important to remember to never speak over or for amab transfeminine people, of course.

also, once you are on testosterone for a while, if you choose HRT, and you choose you present femininely, people more than likely will interpret you as transfeminine. i was getting so aggressively she/her'd when i had my long pink hair that i had to shave it off because i was sick of it. i had an old woman in a dollar store rush up to me to tell me to be careful, because there are people out there who like to attack certain girls. i really appreciated the gesture but it just goes to show you how people jump to conclusions very quickly when they see a "masculine body" and "feminine clothing" combined.

i hope that helps you out, i know it'll take some time for you to be able to come to terms with everything. i still am, myself, it's hard. there's no guidebook to being intersex, i wish our experiences were more well spoken of, but for now we simply have to do our best with what we have. i'm going to write a few zines and leaflets down the road to hopefully help other intersex people like us who are confused and need a sense of community. take care of yourself, hope you're able to sort everything out. good luck

#asks #answers #intersex #transfemasc #transmascfem #transmasc

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quodekash · 1 year

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Why The Entire Harry Potter Epilogue Sucks

most of this has definitely already been said before but I have Thoughts™️ and I need to get them all out in one place. also warning this is very long because my thoughts are big and i talk too much

first, the overall problems (and everything im gonna talk about is the author’s fault cos she wrote it, but this part is more directly her fault so this section could also just be called Me Hating A Bigot):

Why did she make them all end up with their high school sweethearts? just to satisfy the shippers? i mean i dont entirely hate it that much, like its fine, book hinny actually have chemistry and i can imagine book romione going through a lot of bumps in their relationship but smoothing it out and figuring it out after a few years. and yeah they’ve all been through a lot together, and that creates a really tight bond between two or more people, but the point still stands. (my point being: high school relationships are stupid and pointless. (if you want to debate me on this, go ahead. try and change my mind. (this is genuine, i want to hear your reasons and give you my reasons, debates are fun)))

Draco’s wife. Why. Like, i have absolutely nothing against Astoria Greengrass, I’m sure she’s lovely (we never meet her other than like maybe in Cursed Child at some point? but i read that once and am electing to ignore it forever so lets imagine i never said that). it’s not even a problem with how the author made him marry a woman even tho he’s very much a gay man, it’s the problem that he didn’t get the redemption he very much deserved. he had like two or three shining moments. and even then they weren’t so much shining, more... glistening like sweat. but she couldve tried so much harder with him. she wouldnt even have to change the plot of the books at all. just make him marry... not a pureblood. dont make this character have to continue the legacy of purebredness that he almost definitely despises. instead, let him marry a muggle. or a muggleborn. or a half-blood chosen one who defeated the dark lord with draco’s own wand. or just anyone that isnt a pureblood, cos we dont know much about it, but we can only assume that it was an arranged marriage and neither of them actually wanted it, they were just doing it for the sake of their families. which sucks. and also all the purebloods are already related so just... dont make the incest continue, no one wants it.

the names of the kids... i dont like it. well, most of it. naming your kids after your dead parents? that’s fine. it could be a little confusing at times, but they’re nice names and its sentimental. and james’ middle name? i have no problem with it. james sirius potter is a perfect naming choice. definitely not a PREfect naming choice, but absolutely a PERfect naming choice. -and lily luna potter has a ring to it. and i know luna is important, and i know we love luna. but it couldn’t have been like... lily molly potter, so that ginny’s side of the family could be part of it? it couldn’t have been lily minerva potter, to honour the greatest character of the series? it couldn’t have been... other names i cant think of that wouldve been better than lily luna? but overall i dont hate the name lily luna that much, i can deal with it. -as for hugo and rose, as far as i know they dont have middle names? but i just want to know where the names come from. were they just names that they picked out that Felt Right? cos if so i have absolutely no problems with that. it may be that theyre hermione’s parents names? (speaking of which did she ever get to take them back from australia? adding on to that, did her parents know they were from britain when she erased their memories? cos i highly doubt they wouldve magically gotten aussie accents and their voices wouldve stood out pretty clearly, so would they just be Very British but think they’re perfect bogans and never understand why people look at them funny?) But i dont think it is cos ive always assumed that hermione’s mums name is jean cos it’s hermione’s middle name. also i did some extensive research (*cough* a quick google search *cough*) and the name Rose means flower, femininity, that kind of thing, which is sweet, and Hugo means mind or intellect or something like that, which reflects hermione being smart. so those make sense. -but then we get to albus severus. i love the character, he is pure and must be protected. however, the name... no. harry decided to name his kid (the middle child, aka literally the most overlooked one, so there’s the neglected feelings that generally come from being a middle child there already) after two dead guys. “but egg”, you may be thinking, “james sirius was named after two dead guys, too.” Ah, very astute, dear reader, but you’re missing two crucial pieces of information: james and sirius were excellent people who positively affected harry’s life in a lot of ways. Albus and Severus, on the other hand, were people who: emotionally manipulated him, abused him, hated him, raised him as a pig for slaughter, one of them killed the other, and they were both old and sad cos their loved one is gone forever. great idea to name your kid after that. so smart, hazza. absolutely genius.

“19 years later” means, if you do the maths, the epilogue is set in 2016. surely some things would change. like, would they still use a steam engine train? would there be too many people (gotta love overpopulation), so would the place to get on the train (or whatever mode of transport it would be by then) change to fit everyone? why don’t we see queer couples in the background? why isnt there any mention of phones? i just- i have questions, okay? i mean, i guess the book came out 9 years before 2016. but some of these things were still in play in 2007 and it feels like pollution and overpopulation and queer people and smartphones just dont exist i guess.

this is a very small one but i would also like to know how draco and harry and ron all happened to have a child go to school in the same year. like yeah, it happens, but sometimes its like a year or two apart. but nope, they all must’ve f***ed their wives on the same night i guess (i know that’s not how it works, but STILL)

related to the point about it being 2016, but there wasn’t any deamus???? just a tiny mention would’ve been fine. just so that queer readers dont feel so alone. so that queer readers can feel like they’re actually part of this world, that they can feel included and loved, which are the major themes of the series. all we wouldve needed is “Harry saw Dean and Seamus, holding hands and waving goodbye to a little crying girl leaning out of the train window. Seamus tried to conjure a handkerchief to clean her face, but it set itself on fire as soon as he tried, and the girl laughed through her tears.” Or even just that first sentence wouldve been okay. or even a third or fourth sentence where dean sighs into his hand to hide his smile, shaking his head, and either stamps out the fire with his foot or uses aguamenti to put it out but misses and Seamus frowns at him as droplets of water fall down his face and cling to his eyelashes and dean smiles lovingly and kneels down to mock dean’s height and uses the end of his sleeve to wipe off the water and their daughter is laughing really joyously and the train starts to take off but she’s still laughing and smiling and she waves at her weirdo dads until she cant see them again and im sorry im getting carried away, basically what im trying to say here is just one sentence wouldve been all we needed just to feel included

ron being an auror makes sense i dont mind that.

but hermione. why is she in magical law enforcement. i know she cares about justice, but she absolutely would not enjoy sitting behind a desk, she would rather being there, out in the world, helping others because she can, not because it’s her job. she should be a teacher, whether at a muggle school or magical school, i dont flipping care, but she enjoys sharing her knowledge with harry and ron and literally everyone, and that’s what a teacher does. plus, she really looks up to mcgonagall, so you’d think she’d want to be like her: a teacher. and hermione LITERALLY SAYS, out loud, in the books, to rufus scrimgeour, that she doesn’t want a job at the ministry, “i want to make some good in the world”, but then that is just scrapped, never thought about again, and she becomes the flipping minister. she couldve even been an auror, she wouldve been a BOSS at figuring out the target’s next move and how to fight them and bring justice (and i am aware it sounds like im describing her as a batman-like superhero, i dont care, MAYBE HERMIONE IS BATMAN, OKAY?), and working with ron, they would’ve been UNSTOPPABLE. hermione couldve worked at flipin flourish and blotts, she could’ve become the new librarian at hogwarts. i know neither of those are making good in the world, but she wouldve been surrounded by books ALL DAY. honestly she couldve worked with dragons with charlie in romania and it still wouldve been better than stuck behind a desk at the ministry

i love ginny as a quidditch player, that one is excellent and perfect and i cant think of anything better.

like. lupin was great. but harry taught a whole bunch of teenagers - at the same time - to conjure patronuses within a couple of lessons, when it took lupin months to teach harry. (granted, harry was depressed and was both trying to learn the charm and going against a boggart-dementor, so they’re both impressive, but still)

he taught them heaps of spells he’d only learnt the previous year while practicing for the third task, and only out of books, which is really bloody impressive.

and, again, he could conjure a patronus at thirteen years old, when most wizards cant their entire lives.

and he taught them the only useful thing lockhart (kind of) taught him: expelliarmus.

as for moody’s/barty crouch jr’s classes, we dont know anything about them other than the first one where he did the unforgivable curses on spiders, and that other one where he put the imperious curse on the students. and harry just wouldnt morally do any one of those things so he technically didn’t beat those classes but also he did because harry didn’t perform illegal curses on his students, so.

idk about quirrel cos i have no clue what he actually taught them (WHAT WAS THE DEAL WITH THAT REPTILE IN THE MOVIES? (was it a lizard? iguana?? i think it was an iguana but idk)), but he literally bested every single one of the teachers he’d previously had for five years in a couple of months.

also he really enjoyed teaching. he found himself subconsciously planning lessons. he gave them things to improve on, started small and got bigger, gave encouragement, made sure everyone was included, and so many other things i just cant think of right now. and those are all awesome teacher traits. he would’ve loved being a teacher, would’ve loved helping kids reached their full potential.

and thats why he shouldve been a teacher, but heres why he shouldnt have been an auror: hes not invincible. the only person who couldnt kill him at all was voldemort. if voldey had let one of his death eaters step in and cast the spell, harry couldn’t have done anything, he wouldve actually died that time and voldemort wouldve won. and that still applies in the future. and harry’s gonna be fighting dark wizards just about every day. and guess what? he’s the owner of the elder wand. and book harry didnt break it. no no, book harry was sure he’d die a natural death and the wand would lose its power. and im not saying i want harry to die on work, im saying he was pretty reckless because he could get killed by dark wizards (aka people wanting to start their own cult similar to death eaters; death eaters on the run; death eaters put in azkaban who manage to escape; etc etc) on any given day and then they would have the elder wand and it would all turn to sludge.

but also if he couldn’t have taught dada, then surely he couldve at least been a quidditch player like ginny. that would be so much fun. their team would be basically unstoppable, having a bad*ss married couple working together.

just dont have him as an auror, please, im begging you, it doesnt work

and neville being herbology professor is perfect, end of story.

okay and now specific moments

some things that bother me are: albus not wanting to be slytherin, and james making fun of him for maybe possibly being sorted in slytherin. like, shouldnt the problems between the houses have been resolved?? it’s been 19 years since the war people, lets finally resolve some conflict here, pick up the pace guys. but not only that, albus’ fear of slytherin and james�� apparent dislike of slytherin tells us that harry hasn’t told them that slytherins can be good and that all the stereotypes of slytherin aren’t true for everyone and kggkfjgkjgkjfgj

harry hears percy talking about broomstick regulations and is glad to not have the excuse to stop and chat. i dont like that. why doesn’t he want to say hi? percy isnt that bad. i know he’s annoying at times but broomstick regulations would be important, and wouldn’t harry be at least slightly interested in it because quidditch and flying???

it sounds like ron’s saying he only recently passed his drivers test. he’d had 19 years. why did it take him that long. this one isnt big it just bothers me a little bit

why did draco nod ‘curtley’? curtley means rude briefly according to google. that doesnt feel right after everything that’s happened. like, harry literally destroyed the darkest wizard of all time, holding what had previously been draco’s wand. surely that makes some kind of connection. and the trio saved dracos life twice in one day, and saving someone’s life is a literal huge deal, it creates this unspoken bond between you. literally the only reason harry ron and hermione are friends is because harry and ron saved hermione’s life. and saving dracos life, someone who, up until then, they hate? and there’s no mention of any kind of bond or unspoken alliance or anything? they just... go on hating each other? and draco didnt sell them out to his family. which basically means draco saved their lives (BEFORE they saved his), so again theres that connection, that bond, where is it? SURELY it wouldnt be a rude nod?? couldn’t it be an awkward smile? a friendly wink (that could have a double meaning *cough*drarry*cough*)? there would sruely be some kind of connection over the 19 years, like i dont believe that they have never met draco’s child before, i dont believe that the trio and draco havent caught up at some point to say thank you or go out for coffee or whatever functional adults do in their daily lives.

‘dont try to turn them against each other before they’ve even started school.’ YES GOOD EXCELLENT GOOD JOB HERMIONE- ‘dont get too friendly with him tho. granddad weasley would never forgive you if u married a pureblood’ nO. do NOT imply that there’s going to be a romance. this is the fault of the author and also of ron. you should almost never ship people in real life (with few exceptions. like jokes with friends. or larry. or if theyre already a couple.), and ESPECIALLY not LITERAL CHILDREN! being an embarrassing parent talking to your teenage child about their crush or significant other? that’s fine. mortifying in the moment for the child, but funny to look back on. implying that your ELEVEN YEAR OLD CHILD who was probably told about sex and hormones like three weeks ago, is going to MARRY another ELEVEN YEAR OLD CHILD whom they have NEVER INTERACTED WITH is absolutely NOT FINE. and also DO NOT say that your father is NEVER GOING TO FORGIVE THE CHILD. it might seem funny, but this kind of thing could stick with the child forever and, if their hormones do end up making them fall for this other child in the end, they might be terrified of telling their family and might want to keep any potential relationship a secret and that could eat up at them completely and it could result in repression and depression and a whole bunch of mental health problems that wouldve been avoided if ron had just ✨shut his mouth✨. it wouldve been better to say something like ‘“you’re right, sorry”, said ron. but unable to help himself, he leant down and added in a whisper, “we’re counting on you though, Rosie. the family honour rests on your shoulders. but no pressure.” he stood up, grinning, and winked at his daughter.’

i have no problems with teddy and victoire. nor do i have any problems with james’ reaction. nor do i have any problems with what the adults say and what the children say in response to that, i actually like this part.

‘he checked the battered old watch that had once been fabian prewett’s’ IMOKAYIMFINEYOURECRYINGNOTMEHAHA

why is it that both with james and albus, their mother kisses them and their father hugs them? why didn’t ginny get a hug? why couldn’t harry kiss his sons goodbye? bloody stereotypes and raising boys as people who cant show emotion and affection and not letting fathers be intimate with their sons because showing compassion isnt “manly”. it makes me angry.

yOu WeRe NaMeD aFtEr TwO hEaDmAsTeRs AnD oNe oF tHeM wAs A sLyThEriN aNd hE wAs BrAvE HARRY I LOVE YOU BUT THATS NOT WHAT ALBUS NEEDED IN THAT MOMENT. he doesnt care about these dead dudes he’s named after. he doesn’t need to know that slytherins can be brave sometimes like a gryffindor. he doesn’t need to know only one example of a slytherin being a “good person”, especially not when it’s an abusive person who is a terrible example in this situation. what albus needs is reassurance. comfort. “albus, whoever you are and whatever house youre put in, we will still love you and support you. slytherin house is not inherently bad. none of the houses are inherently good or bad. people arent inherently good or bad. it’s almost impossible to fit someone into a box of “good person” or “bad person”, because people are complex. there are always reasons behind our actions. and those are only things that are good or bad. our decisions make us who we are.” thats so much better than a couple of sentences of 'i mean you can choose i guess. cos obviously we want you in gryffindor. but like it doesnt really matter. not that much. also youre named after a manipulative gryffindor and an abusive slytherin so have fun with that, k bye see you at christmas’

basically the author sucks and i need to sleep more

#hp #harry potter #19 years later #harry potter thoughts #hp thoughts #the hp author sucks #drarry #draco malfoy #romione #hinny #lily luna potter #albus severus potter #ALSO SORRY FOR ANY SPELLING AND GRAMMAR MISTAKES ETC #ily all have a great day

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smol-tired-binch-blog · 1 year

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Hello :) Welcome back to another episode of Smol Copy-Pastes A Ramble/Rant From Discord And Calls It A Tumblr Post. This week, we’ll be looking at one of my Crying Over Nishiki sessions which ALSO became a full on rant against Kazama! Whoo! Here we go, gonna be another ‘read more’ cause a) spoilers, and b) reeeeally long unhinged ranting about fictional men :D

“LOOK I COULDVE FIXED HIM, EVEN AFTER HE SLAPPED REINA, I'D HAVE BEEN LIKE 'LISTEN BBY I LOVE U IM HERE FOR U BUT GET YOUR ASS BACK OVER THERE RIGHT NOW AND APOLOGISE TO REINA!!!!!'

BUT NOOOOOO EVERYONE JUST HAD TO DECIDE TO BE A HUGE BITCH TO HIM AND BECAUSE THE DUMBASS LASHED OUT AT ONE OF THE ONLY PEOPLE HE HAD LEFT AND PROBABLY FELT LIKE HE COULDNT GO BACK AND APOLOGISE CAUSE I THINK HIS SELF ESTEEM IS ALREADY LOW ENOUGH BY THEN TO NOT EVEN THINK HE DESERVES HER FORGIVENESS AND THEN YUKO FUCKING DIES BECAUSE KAZAMA IS A FUCKING SHIT DAD AND EVERYONE IS A DICK TO HIM UNPROMPTED AND AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

point is i want to rip Kazama's spine out with my bare hands

hate how the game acts like he's so cool and good when he's really not he failed his kids so so badly ACTUALLY NO THEYRE NOT HIS KIDS HE'S THE ENTIRE REASON THEYRE ORPHANS”

(at this point I moved to the spoilers channel to continue my Unending Kazama Hatred)

OKAY SO TIME TO SCREAM ABOUT THAT MOTHERFUCKER KAZAMA AND HOW THE GAME SUCKS HIS DICK do you have ANY idea how much i hated when they go to Tojo HQ so Tachibana can pay em to leave his sugar baby alone and the old fucker who weve never seen before is like 'u know i'd have paid a billion yen for Kazama when he was ur age. are u worth that much? are u as good as him?' LISTEN HERE CUNT HE IS A BETTER MAN THAN KAZAMA EVER WAS AND EVER WILL BE!!!!!!!

WHICH IS SAYING SOMETHIN SEEING AS HE'S REALLY ANNOYING IN THIS GAME like okay i get it Kazama is a yakuza and ex-hitman i EXPECT him to have done bad shit and it's very nice he set up the orphanage n all but it also isnt cause like bro you murdered these kids parents!!! and idk anythin about their life in the orphanage i'll admit but as an active yakuza i cannot imagine him being the most hands-on, tender, loving parent ever, yknow? ALSO ALSO like i know he tried to stop Kiryu and Nishiki becomin yakuza im just saying YA COULDVE TRIED HARDER MATE!!!! THEY WERE SEVENTEEN YEARS OLD, THEY WERE CHILDREN FOR GOD'S SAKE. KIRYU WAS LIKE 'WHY WONT U LET US BE LIKE U YOURE A YAKUZA U GET A COOL CAR AND PEOPLE RESPECT U LET US TRY AND HAVE THAT' YOURE LETTING HIM SELL HIS SOUL TO A LIFE OF CRIME BECAUSE HE WANTS A FUCKING CAR?????? I DONT CARE HOW STRONG THEY WERE IN THAT FIGHT YA FUCKIN SIT THEM DOWN AND GET RID OF THE ILLUSION OF GLAMOUR!!!!! TELL THEM THEYRE WORTH MORE THAN JUST GRUNTS WHO ARE GOOD WITH THEIR FISTS AND NOT MUCH ELSE, ONE FIGHT IN THE RAIN AND YOURE LETTING THEM JOIN, ABSOLUTELY FUCK RIGHT OFF WITH THAT

AND THEN HE'S SHOVING THEM OFF TO ANOTHER FAMILY BECAUSE OF SOME POLITICAL BULLSHIT IDK BUT FINE FAIR ENOUGH YA DONT WANNA PLAY FAVOURITES BUT I FUCKING HATE THIS WHOLE 'OH SEEMS DISTANT AND UNCARING BUT ACTUALLY HE THOUGHT OF EVERYTHING AND HAS THEIR WELLBEING IN MIND' I JUST- JUST FUCK OFF!!!!!!

MAYBE YA SHOULD PLAY FAVOURITES WHEN ONE OF YOUR CHARGES IS DYING VERY QUICKLY AND HER BROTHER HAS NO ONE FOR SUPPORT. INSTEAD OF FUCKIN LETTING THE GUY THEY APPARENTLY SEE AS BIG BROTHER FUCKING REPRIMANDING THE GUY CAUSE HE CANT GET CONTROL OF OR RESPECT FROM THE PEOPLE YOU ASSIGNED HIM AND SEEMINGLY KNEW THEYD BE DIFFICULT!!!!! HOW IS MY BOY MEANT TO ""PROVE HIMSELF"" WHEN HES DEALING WITH THE TRAUMA OF TAKING A LIFE (EVEN IF THE FUCKER HAD IT COMING), THE GUILT OF LETTING HIS BEST FRIEND TAKE THE FALL, AN ACT OF PURE KINDNEES IN CONTRAST TO HIS OWN BRUTAL IRREVERSIBLE ONE, THE STRESS OF TRYING TO SAVE HIS SISTER WHO IS DYING (MAYBE CONTRIBUTE SOME EXTRA CASH KAZAMA??? MAYBE???) AND DEALING THE AFOREMENTIONED DISRESPECTFUL FUCKERS AND LASHING OUT AND HURTING THE ONE PERSON HE HAS LEFT AND BURNING THAT BRIDGE, AND THE GIRL HE KILLED A MAN FOR HAS LOST HER MEMORY AND VANISHED (WHICH YOU HELPED WITH KAZAMA!!! YOU KNEW SHE WAS SAFE!!!!),

AND THEN THE GRIEF OF LOSING HIS SISTER FOR NO. FUCKING. PURPOSE. HE SOLD OUT HIS REMANING MORALS, HIS PRIDE, ANY RESPECT OTHERS MAY HAVE HAD FOR HIM ALL TO SAVE HER AND IT FAILED. HE WENT THROUGH ALL OF THAT ALONE. YEAH I'D HAVE FUCKIN TURNED EVIL AS WELL!!!!!!!

im not sayin Nishiki is fully free of blame, obviously, he made his choices, and murdering Reina after using her love for him to further his own ends AND killing Shinji and ALL of the shit he pulls in Kiwami, yeah, completely fucked up, horrible, his choices, he did that shit. im just saying that i dont know, maybe if ya wanted to step in at any point in the last ten fucking years Kazama (preferably before that too), ya couldve and fuckin SHOULDVE”

I’ll be honest with ya lads, I stand by every word of this cfvgbhnjkgvbhnj

#smol speaks #smol plays yakuza #akira nishikiyama #anti shintaro kazama #idk is that a tag? idk if he has fans or not i dont wanna go upsettin people #yakuza spoilers #long post #holy fuck that IS a long post i TOLD yall i went off on one cgfvbhjnkm

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hasarjunadoneanythingwrong · 2 years

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Something you missed.

https://lapithae.tumblr.com/post/702003747138715648/2-major-factions-in-chaldea-the-14-yr-old-heroic#notes

????? are you talking about their reblog?? their tags??? i literally reblogged their commentary about the translation about the scene what are you trying to say here??? i read all the tags on everything i post i definitely read what they said, and trust me, i am NOT the ' people focusing too much on the 'drinking age' thing and sort of. missing the point.' literally the only reason i started bringing drinking age up was because people WOULDNT STOP FOCUSING ON IT

THE POINT IS NOT ABOUT ALCOHOL OR DRINKING AGE

IT IS ABOUT HOW TIME HAS PASSED, BEEN CONFIRMED IN GAME TO PASS, AND THEY ARE STILL CATEGORIZED INCONSISTENTLY AS A CHILD

I WAS MAKING FUN OF IT BECAUSE ITS SILLY. IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A FUNNY POST. WHY IS THIS MAKING EVERYONE SO WEIRD????? THERE HAVE LITERALLY BEEN SEVEN CHRISTMASES AND SUMMERS AND YET THEYRE STILL TOO YOUNG TO DRINK, WHICH SUGGESTS CHALDEA HIRED THEM AROUND AGE 13-14. CAN I NOT FUCKING JOKE ABOUT THE IMPLICATIONS OF PINNING HUMANITY'S CONTINUED SURVIVAL ON A SINGLE 13 YEAR OLD???

like im sorry if i seem to be getting really irritated about this but it wasnt even supposed to be about kintoki's comment in the first place, he was just a more recent example of someone saying that sort of thing! im well aware kintoki is the kind of person who would get involved if he thought someone needed help regardless of their age, and if i'd known this would have brought the pedants out in full force i wouldve...idk compiled a post of every example of someone calling the mc a child? not made the post??

i legitimately dont know what you were trying to tell me with this. i saw this post. i reblogged this post. i'm definitely not mad at lapithae and i appreciate that they added context to kintoki's scene (SINCE I THOUGHT I HAD MADE IT CLEAR IN THE OG POST I KNEW KINTOKI WOULD GET INVOLVED REGARDLESS OF AGE BUT IT SEEMS READING IS DIFFICULT FOR A LOT OF PEOPLE THIS WEEK) but what do you hope to gain with this?

'haha op doesnt know that japan can't depict minors drinking so thats why ritsuka is a minor forever' i did in fact know this. literally why make them a minor in the first place if its such an issue. they literally had a scene last month where they offer van gogh absinthe and then give her the child trait. 'haha op is fixating too much on alcohol when the specific scene is-' the specific scene was just one picked to support a joke post. i couldve used another one. the only reason i started talking about alcohol was because other people wouldn't shut up about it and it had nothing to do with the scene in question but because i had about 10000 people nagging me about how ritsuka is a minor, and thus can't drink, and so they have to note it, when we all know damn well most people from most older cultures wouldnt have given a shit about modern drinking laws and frankly even drank more beer than actual water even as children. please give it a rest

i dont understand what you're trying to say

#im sorry if this comes off as really pissy but im in a grouchy mood rn. this has been a week and this whole....#idk intentional misinterpreting of something i said is SERIOUSLY pushing some buttons lol #to be clear im not mad at the person who added commentary tho its fine #my asks #neg post #idk if anyones sussed it out yet but i REALLY dont like being misinterpreted. like i hate hate hate it lmao.#anyway i gotta take care of this ap bar

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neomedievalist · 2 years

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what r your problems with smt iv? like what it couldve done better

hard to put into words...the game just feels overall a bit messy at times. its clearly put together with a lot of passion and love so you can forgive it but the plot can be a bit all over the place...

there are naturally gameplay complaints like phys skills costing mp, and the map being very difficult to navigate, but i dont think those are really a big deal. some people will probably argue that being on the 3ds hurts it and, yeah probably. the VN style is a bit rough at times, and the cutscenes are not...great. i honestly think they really made the most of the 3ds especially for a game released really early in its lifespan. like, it looks really nice for a 3ds game, even compared to some really nice looking 3ds games that were released a lot later.

i think the plot falls apart the more you think about it and ive had to sort of turn my brain off to enjoy it at times. i know i'm the massive lore analysis posts guy but i really have to wonder how much of this the writers ACTUALLY thought of... i think one of my biggest complaints is neutral route, where the masakado stuff feels like it comes out of nowhere and adds this random plot thats not especially relevant to the main themes of the game... i honestly really like neutral route for a number of reasons but it totally takes you out of the main conflict to do some quest thats more in line with a traditional rpg and makes you just not care about it... do other people know what im talking abt here

it can be pretty inconsistent in its writing too and it feels like its backing away from Really saying something at some points...characters motivations can be sometimes contradictory and sometimes very flat. theres a lot of characters introduced to be killed off. while i complain when people say smtiv's characters are flat, i see where they're coming from.

that's all i can think of right now but i just feel like smtiv was so ambitious trying to do so many things that it fell a bit flat in some aspects (this is coming from the #1 smtiv liker. i still love it so much.)

the reason nocturne stands out so much as a masterpiece after all these years is because of its minimalism. it focused really hard on doing a few things really really well, and yeah it Can feel empty because of that, but it made it age so well and still hold up today. so thats why i say nocturne is objectively better than smtiv. even though smtiv is more special to me and i might 'like it' more

anyone else have any thoughts? feels like im being asked for my video game opinions a lot lately

#data

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away-ward · 9 months

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Long post!

1. This might be an unpopular opinion, but i actually like that alex fought in the train with emmy because she was jealous of em. + alex was probably jealous of emmy too because alex and aydin was seduced by em. A big part of the sex in the BC shower and the train was because em was the one doing the talking and seducing and going after what she wants, teasing the men and women there, no? Not alex, and what was alex known for? Exactly this but even she (and probably his ex fiance and othe rhigh profile women) couldnt get aydin in bed together after everything, but this woman aydin just met for a couple of days is serving up his fantasy and contributed to him being pleasured? In alex's mind, she was pronably angry af at emmy, even angrier when she wanted to touch her too, and unlike rika and banks or even kai, it was not business hour, she really did found emmy attractive and wanna get on with her, so she probably thought "ok if i wanna fuck her, why wont aydin?" So instead of seeing this scene as only emmy pleasuring alex, it also means that theres alex and aydin who were always getting what they want and dominating the conversation or sex, seducing people left and right, but with emmy in their equation, THEY were the one who became charmed, and yes, alex didnt like that because em got aydins attention. I'm pretty sure if alex was not in the picture, or will, aydin would've wanted emmy ☠️

2. Unlike you guys, i never thought that alex ever thought she owned will *like that*. The most extreme is just her protectiveness of her best friend and family, which throughout the whole series every woman and man did the same thing, they're physically and emotionally intimate with each other, they casually become possessive over one another, doesnt matter if it siblings, friends, partners etc, and we can see, even that stoic doofus michael was protective of emmy when martin came near her later on at the end of nightfall. +Em was never their friend, and they dont do casual for best friends and family, so how were they supposed to react to and approach her knowing she put them in jail without caring to confess before? A bit entitled for emmy and us to ask for more from them, no? But i can totally see why it's understandable in emmy's pov, she could've seen the whole situation differently just like how will and alex misunderstood emmy's connection with aydin. But whether or not aydin wnated em like how alex and em wnated each other in the train, i think it could be possible, and add to the flames of anger for will and alex (which was drama and messy and at this point, anything that put will alex a peg down, i'm all up for it, lmao, im a messy person 🤣🤞) but we'll never know now how that'll play out in the future. And like i said, this was probably the biggest reason why alex was mad, because aydin wanted em, and em couldve had aydin even without doing much (or even if she might not be interested in aydin herself).

3. I feel like in this book because emmy was the more dominant one, i actually dont see it as her pleasuring alex was something bad or megative, the way we look and frame these scenes in outr minds play a big part to how much we accept it (again probably just my unpopular opinion), because in my mind, that scene was an empowering move for emory, because she gets what she wants, while her man was watching, and it shows that people wants her and wants to look at her too. Women who gives is just as empowering as those who gets back, idk why a lot of you anons and asks always have this implication that being served or pleasure is the only way for empowerment for em, because that thought alone is weird, but maybe it's just me who didnt find your questions and answers kinda ok? Idk, emmy was doing what she wants and maybe it was ugly right, but hey who cares? Not emmy, because the one who was pridefully trying to prove a point to their friends by dragging the other down was alex, not emory (in fact emory had a history of not giving a fuck about what people think of her, so do you really think she would start now?), so even if alex play this game, emmy was not losing anything even out of pride, because after eveyrthing had happened, alex realised that she was the one embarrassingly playing this winning game alone. This was how iinterpreted the bridal gown scene with alex and emmy too, that alex felt guilty towards emmy because the game was one-sided. I remember that in the train, when emmy called her out when alex said em didnt know how to sacrifice lke her, alex couldnt verbally fight back because m was right, alex just didnt want to understand her out of her shallow pride. She fought her physically, but it should how kinda dumb alex was in that moment, Which also goes to show how big-hearted and mature emmy was about the whole situation. Emmy had to get the short end of the stick again, but hey, at leats the characterisation was consistent 🤣☠️😭 (im so sorry emmy for this pun)

4. Now, Could all of these scenes be handled better? Of course, but with characters as immature and wrongly and immaturely loud (most of the time) as will and alex, always talking faster than they think because they do whatever they "feel" like and that is comsidered as the benchmark of "freedom" instead of irrationality like how we and emmy saw it, do you think a rational comversation can happen in the midst of chaos? With will and alex? 🤣 no fucking way, hahaha! I have to laugh when i see someone recommending this because as much as thats OUR wish fulfilment, we dont always get what we want and in this case, a mature and understanding will who was not hurting and able to talk without wanting to just destroy eveyrthing. a lot of dn scenes had more than one meaning, and i dont think all these scenes you guys have mentioned were only catering to one pov, because clearly like mine, it was beyond just emmy giving into alex, but also everyone giving into each other. A scene where emmy getting pleasured by being submissive most likely wont happen because SHE was the one who always seduce and dominate people, and thats how most dominant women gets pleasured, even in real life or in WLW dominant relationships, by dominating others no matter their pride or unjust anger. Idk why we're surprised here and it was not also seen in a different pov like it was something good that a dominating woman gets what she wants, even when her pride was thrown out of the window. Maybe because ikm queer so thats why i can understand this scene better. The only thing that i fucking hated about this scene is the fact that will would let em fuck alex, but not aydin. If they"re all queer, then why would there be a difference between em getting pleasured by and for aydin any different than with alex? This can come off as queer or WLW fetish instead. The same goes when em was ok when will hooked up with damon, but not when he was with alex? Borderline queer fetishes are here in these scenes and its implication, not anywhere else as far as i can catch them by now. But i can also understand how people get angry at alex unlike damon because damon made it clear that he wasnt will's potential love interest, unlike alex who always look like she might snatch will from emmy especially in emmy's povs.

5. Also another interesting point to add is the horsemen, banks and emmy were very prideful people about their weaknesses unlike rika, winter and alex (and even will to some point), they just never talk about their pain or hardship, and its affecting their relationship with others, so something just has to give for these prideful people to talk about it or so something about their weaknesses in order to bridge the gap between them and everyone else, and the classic fashion for pd was through shocking and horrid sex scenes (physical intimacy) imstead of honest talk (verbal intimacy). In that train, emmy finally submit to them all and accepting their all, and them too submitting to her, and for someone who took nearly 10 years to give in like emmy, i think the train scene was shocking, but the impact of it, if you relatively consider about her 10 years of absence, it doesnt really NOT make sense. I feel like we're getting angry at the scene because out of pride as the readers who we want our wants catered to us, we do not want to lose against alex in this game of cat and mouse, but we're not emmy guys, this was how SHE solves her problem, and she was TIRED OF BLEEDING. She was not ashamed of dominating and playing the field too. Something has to give. It's clear that even will thinks like that and even alex later on was more subdued with her behaviour when she met em again in that bridal gown scene, because alex was the one actually losing, not emmy. It's a win fo them but alex, as a friend doing all of that, at what cost? She lost.

6. They cant be like that forever, especially when em wanted to be with will, and is now more accepting to the idea of fitting in with the horsemen and their wives (because she gets to trust and love herself more now, and more inclined to work with his family instead of self-sabotaging herself thinking she wasnt enough to keep up with all of his "amazing life" and him too with everything that is her), and everyone then with emmy because now they know she's with them for life. She's theirs now in ther little cult family with that little cult family crest of a chocker and rongs. Because the ball was almost always in her court then, even in high school, except for damon, no one was against her, and even later damon slowly warmed up to her, but she just never threw it their way and thats also why will couldnt bring her anywhere even in the mask giving scene because he thought she didnt want this lifestyle. Unlike rika in corrupt who already admitted to want to be like them and join this hell shit family. We might not like her to be in this shitty family, but emmy like it, likes them, never hated them, and finally found enough time and love for herself to want to admit to be apart of them, and them with her. Her going to SF and ditching will would be some readers' wish fulfilment but was nit what emmy would wnated for her life. The fact that she went back home after the horsemen went to jail, and would worry when his brother always causes trouble for them since high school showed that in a corner in he rheart where she lets herself be honest, emory did care about will and the horsemen, even if her mouth says no and her actions move backwards.

7. It's all very layered i think, it wasnt as easy as "oh emmy was pleasuring alex and thats not what we want evn though thats what emmy wants", "lf the horsemen were shit to her for no reason" etc etc. like you all got your points here and there, and im adding this ask to add my pov too, +and i believe some of these opinions were already discussed in your older posts about michael and kai's response towards emmy in the train, right? but do let me know if what i said makes sense, because it made sense to me but it might not to others. Sometimes what we want from an author might not fit into our narrative because we kinda already have something in our mind that we want from themand we're fixated on it, and i feel like this is the case for people reading nightfall especially, but this doesnt mean it's good or bad, it just impacts how we read the story. However i also agree that these atrocities could've been done better and pd should really get their shit together and write a better story. It's not a simple series with a black or white pov, i feel like a lot scenes could kean different, IF you're willing to engage yourself in a different pov which a lot of you guys might mot simply because what you guys wnat is nkt guven here, just some two cents from me. I believe a discussion can still be made though, only after considering many povs without limiting an option because lets say "we dont want aydin alex here" "oh this could be a different plot". I liked your "No Apologies" fic but i dont think someone as daring to make shitty turn around arc like pd would go for your tamer plot for both will and emmy, something MORE had to happen, so it was a good fic, but i cannot ever see these fanfic characterisations of emmy by you happening in PD's writing or plot. The willemmy in your fics were always a bit mellow than in pd's, and i feel like it's because it's usually lacking in weird and shocking actions or words that were always present in pd's works. It's canon and fanfics for a reason, i enjoy them both, but for different reasons. They serve their purpose between author's voice and fan works.

Anyway, It's just a goofy fun series to not be taken too seriously at the end of the day, and like your older posts, i agree, some things might make sense, some thing might not, but i like the discussion going on for it though, because the way you guys interpret this series was woahh, very different than me and thats ok. It's because these characters who always feel everything deeply, i feel like we also get carried away with them, the irony! Sorry if this post is too much, or if i come off as harsh, i was just trying yo put two and two together, putting aside feelings and making one scene made semse with the other. Idk if that worked or not.

Hey! Thanks for taking the time to send this in. It was actually very refreshing to get.

but i actually like that alex fought in the train with emmy because she was jealous of em. + alex was probably jealous of emmy too because alex and aydin was seduced by em.

Not wholly unpopular. This idea as a reason for Alex and Em’s back and forth, specifically on the train, has been bought up before. I believe their idea was that Alex felt inferior to Em, but I’d have to check.

This woman aydin just met for a couple of days is serving up his fantasy and contributed to him being pleasured? In alex’s mind, she was pronably angry af at emmy

I personally never felt that Aydin sincerely wanted Em. My interpretation was always that he saw her as being the same as him, and wanted to use her to hurt Will like Alex had hurt him. Not that he had ill-will for Em, but she was never his focus. From what I gathered, he only ever wanted Alex. And I can’t really comment about whether he would have wanted her if things were different, but it’s open to interpretation.

, i never thought that alex ever thought she owned will *like that*.

What I said in that previous post (if I'm thinking of the right one from earlier) probably came out wrong. I didn’t mean that Alex felt Will’s was hers, in that she was possessive over him, but more like you said – hers to protect. Will was her reflection; they were one and the same. They weren’t in love, but they were more than friends (thinking of it from their perspective).

Em was never their friend, and they dont do casual for best friends and family, so how were they supposed to react to and approach her knowing she put them in jail without caring to confess before? A bit entitled for emmy and us to ask for more from them, no?

I’ve expressed similar thoughts in the past. I think it’s important to remember (but also easy to forget) that, one: unreliable narrators very much exist, and two: every character is working with different information. From the past to the present, the reader is the only one with all the pieces as we go.

Even I get lost in the thought of how things should have gone because I’ve gone over this so many times, but you’re bringing up very good points.

Because in my mind, that scene was an empowering move for emory, because she gets what she wants, while her man was watching, and it shows that people wants her and wants to look at her too.

This is a fair way to look at the situation. I think for myself, I’ve always had an issue with this scene because I didn’t see the build-up to Alex and Emmy. For me, Emmy saying she wanted Alex came out of nowhere. I also didn’t understand how they became such good friends after spending one night drinking together.

I have a post where I go into my thoughts on Alex as a character. I don’t think her role within the story was bad. Unlike some, I don’t wish Alex never existed (though I do understand why people feel that way, and occasionally think the things they have to say are funny. What can I say, I think angry rants can be funny. Sue me.). But I get irritated with the way Alex is written.

So, because of those things, I don’t understand why Emmy wants Alex. I do get that Emmy is finally going after what she wants and on her terms, which great for her, but as for why it’s Alex? That I don’t get.

A lot of Anons do have a problem with Emmy always being the one to give and bend. So, to see her dominating Alex, who has recently said and done some pretty nasty things to Emory personally, doesn’t feel good. Even if Alex was acting out of jealousy, she still took the same actions.

This was how iinterpreted the bridal gown scene with alex and emmy too, that alex felt guilty towards emmy because the game was one-sided.

You know, it’s been awhile since I read this scene, and I was working from memory, which admittedly could be faulty. It could be that Alex did express some guilt over the one-sided game she was playing. I do remember her apologizing, but I also remember Emory stopping her, which is what I was pulling from. The conclusion is that Emory is always the one being the bigger person when Alex rightfully owes her an apology.

I think readers get mad that PD didn’t want Alex to apologize?

Which also goes to show how big-hearted and mature emmy was about the whole situation. Emmy had to get the short end of the stick again, but hey, at least the characterization was consistent

Yeah, exactly this.

Of course, but with characters as immature and wrongly and immaturely loud (most of the time) as will and alex, always talking faster than they think because they do whatever they "feel" like and that is comsidered as the benchmark of "freedom" instead of irrationality like how we and emmy saw it, do you think a rational comversation can happen in the midst of chaos?

This is my general feelings towards the idea of the characters “just talking.” Like… even if they were to communicate, it probably wouldn’t do anything because they’re all just talking faster than they think (what a great way to phrase that!).

Because as much as that’s OUR wish fulfilment

It really is. Because of the general discourse on tumblr, sometimes I think that readers have forgotten that characters aren’t always going to do things the “right” way or a way that makes us feel good. For me, when a character behaves in a way that doesn’t make sense, it can draw out my curiosity. Why did they do that? What’s making them act this irrational way? Can I explain it? And even if the explanation is messy, there’s still something to it, I think.

and i dont think all these scenes you guys have mentioned were only catering to one pov, because clearly like mine, it was beyond just emmy giving into alex, but also everyone giving into each other.

Like Will said, Emmy was finally going over the cliff with them. And they were seeing what she was made of.

It was not also seen in a different pov like it was something good that a dominating woman gets what she wants, even when her pride was thrown out of the window.

I see what you’re saying and why it would be a good thing from Em’s pov, but again, for me, it goes back to not understanding why Alex is suddenly the one needing to be dominated. I’m all for Emmy going after what she wanted, taking it without asking. But I don’t see the bond between her and Alex, and I don’t see how it fixes anything between her and Will.

I also don’t like that this is the last fully fleshed out scenes in the series. Every other scene that would happen between the main couple after this is fade to black. It really does emphasis that Will and Emory take a back seat in their own book, and this is feeling is only amplified by how much Alex is featured afterward compared to Emmy, and the kind of scenes that Alex is the focus of in both Will and Emmy's pov.

Maybe because ikm queer so I why I can understand this scene better. The only thing that I fucking hated about this scene is the fact that will would let em fuck alex, but not aydin. If they”re all queer, then why would there be a difference between em getting pleasured by and for aydin any different than with alex? This can come off as queer or WLW fetish instead.

This is a fair explanation for what other anons have been saying. I’ve said that I couldn’t comment on it because I don’t know the intent PD, a queer author, was writing with, but this explanation does help. I had noticed the pattern, but hadn’t made the connection.

. The same goes when em was ok when will hooked up with damon, but not when he was with alex?

Maybe it’s just me, but I don’t think that Em was ever mad about Will hooking up with Alex or anyone else. She wanted him to be happy, even if that was without her. It hurt that it couldn’t be her, and of course she didn’t want his conquests shoved in her face – which is what he did all the time. That’s where I saw her jealousy mostly come in to play. She could acknowledge what he had done and be fine, but when he started taunting her is when she’d get angry and react.

But your point stands. That was just a little side thought on my end.

I feel like we're getting angry at the scene because out of pride as the readers who we want our wants catered to us, we do not want to lose against alex in this game of cat and mouse, but we're not emmy guys, this was how SHE solves her problem, and she was TIRED OF BLEEDING.

I think it was in character for Emmy for her to want to take charge of the situation. She was never passive with Will; why would she be with anyone else.

I really just think the issue is the dynamic between Emory and Alex needed to be fleshed out a bit more.

Because she gets to trust and love herself more now, and more inclined to work with his family instead of self-sabotaging herself thinking she wasn’t enough to keep up with all of his “amazing life” and him too with everything that is her

I just really liked how you phrased this.

We might not like her to be in this shitty family, but emmy like it, likes them, never hated them, and finally found enough time and love for herself to want to admit to be apart of them, and them with her. Her going to SF and ditching will would be some readers' wish fulfilment but was nit what emmy would wnated for her life. The fact that she went back home after the horsemen went to jail, and would worry when his brother always causes trouble for them since high school showed that in a corner in he rheart where she lets herself be honest, emory did care about will and the horsemen, even if her mouth says no and her actions move backwards.

Yeah.

And this is also why I like working within canon universe a lot of the time. Because when, as a writer, you’re forced to work within the decisions the characters have made for themselves, it helps you understand and sympathize with their decisions.

It’s all very layered I think

It is all very layered. Absolutely. There is no clear-cut, right and wrong interpretation.

Do let me know if what I said makes sense, because it made sense to me but it might not to others

I think a lot of what you’ve said makes sense, and I agree with the majority of it. I do think some of it is going to be unpopular, but different interpretations is just a thing to deal with in fandoms.

Sometimes what we want from an author might not fit into our narrative because we kinda already have something in our mind that we want from themand we’re fixated on it, and I feel like this is the case for people reading nightfall

Oh it absolutely is. PD said so themselves and the negative reactions to NF is one of the reasons they don’t really want to come back to the series. And even in the bonus scene, you could see them struggling with what to write because they already knew that half the fandom was going to hate whatever it was they came up with. Which turned out to be the case with most of the people here.

Again, I can only say what I think based on my experiences, but I feel that part of the issue that what you said before – PD writes these “shocking and horrid sex scenes (physical intimacy) instead of honest talk (verbal intimacy)”, but since we’ve already had the physical intimacy, a lot of readers are ready for the domestic, verbal intimacy, and it just never comes.

I liked your "No Apologies" fic but i dont think someone as daring to make shitty turn around arc like pd would go for your tamer plot for both will and emmy, something MORE had to happen, so it was a good fic, but i cannot ever see these fanfic characterisations of emmy by you happening in PD's writing or plot

and i feel like it's because it's usually lacking in weird and shocking actions or words that were always present in pd's works

Oh yeah, I totally get that. This is very accurate and will always be so. I won’t ever write to the degree of wild, weird, or shocking that PD writes. It's just not what I'm interested in writing. My fics have just been a way to fill a hole in the narrative that I feel, and I post with the hopes that others get a moment of fun from it.

It's just a goofy fun series to not be taken too seriously at the end of the day

Couldn’t agree more. As I’ve said, this isn’t a series that was meant to be looked at this closely. It was meant to be a fun rollercoaster of a series.

And I think there is something very fun about this series and the characters and the writing that keeps readers engaged despite all its flaws, because otherwise half of us wouldn’t have made it through NF.

Sorry if this post is too much, or if i come off as harsh, i was just trying yo put two and two together, putting aside feelings and making one scene made semse with the other. Idk if that worked or not.

Not too much at all. I thoroughly enjoyed it. Thanks for sharing your thoughts!

-KO

#asked and answered 147 #asked and answered #devil's night series stuff #emory scott #no alex tag #train scene #character discussion #series discussion #response to prev ask #asked and answered 143 #asked and answered 146

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