#im not christian but jesus come take me now

[icanthidefrommyfamilyline]

rlly in my active era rn guys 🤪

(please someone come save me im so bored and lonely im literally just sitting in my bed rotting away)

[open-sketchbook]

i'm super high so forgive the rambling but

as somebody who grew up catholic and read the bible a bunch because it was words in a book and that's what i did in school, a thing thats fucking insane about christianity is how, like, the foundational text of christianity and christanity-the-institution are basically completely the opposite of one another

original observation i know but this isn't me like, doing a new thing, its reeling over an old well-worn thing because its just so insane

like fundamentally the pitch of christianity, as presented in stories about jesus, is "god made himself into a guy, but not just a guy, a poor working man in roman-occupied judea. this guy went around telling everyone how god is on the side of the poor, the oppressed, and the downtrodden, and against the rich, the occupier, and the authority. to be kind to each other, help each other, even the ones you're supposed to hate, and take solace in the face the day is coming when those in power get what's coming to them."

but then the romans decided christianity was theirs now, and i dont think we like... understand how fucking weird that is. its like if the president of the united states one day got up and declared that actually, its Soviet America now. nothing is changing materially, capital still rules america, but the flags are all red and there's hammers and sickles on everything and people call each other comrade

because that's exactly what it is, right? none of the stuff in the jesus parts of the bible are really, like, conducive to the state religion of a giant conquering slave empire, especially not the part where the romans killed the dude. so like, basically every single thing about christainity is this bizarre smoke and mirrors game with theological wordplay to get around that. the institutions of the church exist to undermine the core stuff that's written in their foundational document through a game of theological telephone.

and again like, i keep coming back to the soviet america example idea thing. because that's exactly what it is, right? imagine its like, a thousand years from now, and in some liberal government culturally descendent from the united states you got an election and the two candidates get up and cite the parts of Capital where Karl Marx is like "alright i'll hand it to the capitalists they sure built a lot of machine tools" to show their devotion to communism, which of course teaches that capitalists should own the means of production

its exactly that! they literally took a religion built around a dude who really fucking hated the roman occupation and talked endlessly about giving to others and sharing with others and helping those unlike yourself and made it into the religion of rome, of taking and keeping and hurting those unlike yourself.

its so fucking wild man (again; i am so goddamn high. to be clear, this isn't a defense of christianity or of issues with jesus as portrayed, like im not saying that actually we should be Original Jesusers, i fully agree that christanity has antisemetism at its core, its more just musing on how wild it is this happened)

[irisinluv]

Mirror Yandere Brainrot

I’ve been thinking about a Yandere who can watch you through mirrors. And I don’t mean Erik from Phantom of the Opera. I mean paranormal level watching you through any surface that can hold a reflection. The shop window you catch a glimpse of your hair in, the sunglasses you use as a mirror to reapply your lipstick, the shower head that makes you giggle cuz it gives your face a fisheye effect. Whatever.

I picture the obvious- how they watch you frown and turn to look at your cellulite, practice how to stand to make your stomach appear the way you want, do a fake laugh to see if that chip in your tooth is noticeable…. All those stupid little things that we hyper focus on, that makes us upset, makes us hate our reflection, they of course, love. They wish they could take away all those insecurities. And they know exactly how they’d do it too.

But it’s not just the obvious self love arc for this mirror Yan. Oh no. Cuz, we don’t just have mirrors to reflect on how much we hate our bodies. You bet your ass your Yandere sees you recreating doctor pimple popper on your own face. Sees your shower karaoke, watches you burn your toast, stub your toe, roll down your windows and get into character as you scream sing Jesus take the wheel (bonus points if you’re not Christian btws- we’re allowed to jam to that too). They just love getting to watch all these mundane moments!

They do of course get frustrated that they can only watch you through the mirrors. But- haven’t you heard that you’re not supposed to sleep facing a mirror? That things from the other side can come out to get you? Mmmm….. yea so those 1980’s mirrored closet doors you have might be a biiiiiiit of a problem.

I think they’d just be able to access you in your dreams, at least as a start, but if they ever found a way to you for real….. whew. Whewwwww. Hello sailor! I mean mirror Yan surely can mirror your exact type. That’s. That’s kinda their whole thing isn’t it? Magic mirror shit.

Slight NSFW below cut

Once they’re out…. They would not fuck you against mirrors.

I know that’s where your brain may go at first. The typical “look at how I see you- you’re perfect!” Shit. But I’m sorry. If someone fucked me and I had to look at myself covered in sweat, hair sticking to my face, triple chins for days, stomach rolls rolling, cellulite dimpling….. IM NOT IN THE MOOD ANYMORE!

So nah. Mirror Yan won’t fuck you against a mirror. They WILL however, use their voice. They had gone unheard so long…. You had gone YEARS being unable to hear them, see them, feel them. So now that they have you in their arms, they’re going to make sure you hear, see, and feel them until there’s nothing else for you to focus on.

If we want to stick with the self love trope, an alternative to the mirror fucking thing, is them narrating what they see. Their voice is pure sin as they drive into you, sink down on you, or look up from between your thighs to describe the way your pupils look right now, all blown out. How you look like you’re praying when you cum, even though they’re the ones on their knees. They describe those things you hate about yourself too. But when they describe it, they sound reverential. They also sound horny as all hell. But most of all, they sound like the only thing keeping them alive is so they can keep seeing and feeling these parts of you.

And they make you watch them as they give you the most intense pleasure of your life. They may not make you stare into a mirror as they rail you…. But you WILL keep your eyes open so you can see exactly what you do to them. They CRAVE being seen by you. They have you play with yourself the way they’ve watched you do so many times…. Except now, your eyes are locked onto theirs as your eyebrows screw up, and it’s THEIR name you gasp out as your fingers fly. And they don’t have to just watch anymore either.

They also almost always want you facing them. They want you to look them in the eyes and know EXACTLY who is claiming you, body mind and soul. The only exception to the mirror fucking thing is if you/they want to hit it from the back. If you’re not looking in each others faces, you’re looking at each others reflection. If your eyes glass over, they’re smacking your ass to bring your attention back to them. You’re not missing a second of the absolute pleasure dripping from their face. They’re not shy about it either. Their eyebrows screwing up in ecstasy, mouth hanging loose in a perpetual moan, it’s lewd. It’s sloppy. And it’s all for you.

You see, they’re insecure over being glossed over- it was fantastic getting to watch you basically every minute of the day, but you have no idea how frustrating it is to scream out to your lover, cry and kick and wail, as you watch them breeze past a flat puddle on a sidewalk, none the wiser. So, they make sure you’re VERY present with them.

I also think they’d be a huge fan of cockwarming. Just being connected to each other as much as possible. Really needy behavior after being denied physical contact for so long. For my lovelies who cock warming doesn’t work for- you’re not off the hook. Mirror Yan will be wrapped around you just as much. Their fingers absentmindedly trailing your body, their fingers dipping into your mouth, inside you, over your hips….

OH and they love marking you. Hickeys, some sort of collar or necklace, hell, even a collarbone tattoo. They want you to look at your reflection, and see THEM. They may not be stuck on the other side of that reflection anymore, but they still get a thrill from knowing every time you look in a mirror…. It’s them you think of.

So uh. Yea. Even the mirrors are horny for y’all! Stay tuned, maybe I’ll come up with a Yandere spork or dildo next.

[destiel-news-channel]

please, dear Dionysos, tell me this is satire! please. i am begging you, you blue-skinned, yellow haired deity.

you heard about reading comprehension on tumblr now get ready for tumblr image interpretation!

Image ID under the cut

[Image ID: Two screenshots of a tumblr post overlayed with a blue water filter. The first sentence is 'i'm sorry but-' followed by a picture from the opening ceremony of the Olympics in Paris. The picture shows a catwalk from the side with models in different costumes standing along it on the other side. On the catwalk is a nearly naked man painted blue with yellowish hair and a flower crown laying on a bed of flowers and singing in a microphone. The following text is 'This is wrong, so uncomfortably wrong. Blame it on me being Christian but this? No, just no. You can't just take something from a religion and not expect backlash for changing something very important to Christians.' This is followed by a picture of the Last Supper with Jesus sitting at a table with his twelve apostles. He is famously not blue and not laying cuntily on the table while singing into a microphone. There is also a lack of flowers and a catwalk. The text after that is 'This is 'The last supper' a painting portraying Jesus and the apostles before his crucifixion. Where he introduces the Holy Communion, which is an essential part of Christianity. - Everyone jumps up and down when other religions are slighted but with Christianity "it's not so bad." "Get over it." "You had it coming." This is not a joke this is blasphemy. - I get it. You guys want representation, but this is not the way to go.' The tags on the post are '#olympics opening #blasphemy #the last supper #if you're coming into the comments or reblog to fight me #don't #you don't burn sacred texts or change something sacred and just go "oh well" "go cry about it" "you deserve it" #you just don't #incoherent rant #now if you'll excuse me #im going to wait #im getting very involved in things these days #'oh but it's not the same thing' it is #why do you think dstv removed the opening and samsung retracted their sponsorship? #just because? no #of course i'll speak up #olympics 2024 #olympics'. /End ID]

[project-icarus]

dirk gently season 2 dashboard simulator

🔎 holistic-detective Follow

this edible ain't shit

🔎 holistic-detective Follow

there's a house inside the house

🔎 holistic-detective Follow

where's that music coming from

🔎 holistic-detective Follow

ok so I might be in actual judeo-christian hell

18 notes

👾 purplepeopleeater Follow

im so hungry

🔎 holistic-detective Follow

how hungry

🔎 holistic-detective Follow

OP HOW HUNGRY

682 notes

🔪 bart Follow

has anyone seen Ken?

3 notes

✂️ normal-man-from-this-world Follow

I will find dirk gently, fulfill the prophecy, and save Wendimoor!

✂️ normal-man-from-this-world Follow

jail

835 notes

🚖 literally-just-some-guy-deactivated Follow

put your hand in my enclosure I promise I won't bite

🕶 blackwing-boss Follow

hey what's your superpower

🚖 literally-just-some-guy-deactivated Follow

please let me out

🚖 literally-just-some-guy-deactivated Follow

I'll be sooooo niceys if you let me out

411 notes

🕶 blackwing-boss Follow

what a nice day! I sure hope no one manipulates me into giving them the same clearance as me so they can take my job

💻 newer-better-blackwing-boss Follow

>:3

1k notes

🚬 the-fifth-rowdy Follow

fuckkkkk I don't know where my friends are

🚬 the-fifth-rowdy Follow

welp. to the train tracks!

🚬 the-fifth-rowdy Follow

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

🚬 the-fifth-rowdy Follow

don't worry guys I'm fine

🧍‍♂️randombystander Follow

no i don't think you are

🚬 the-fifth-rowdy Follow

you've never been plagued by visions and it shows

83k notes

ok i give up theres too many characters and things that happen in that show jesus christ

rip Farah and also Tina and also mona I swear I tried to include them (and also more bart lmao) but I couldn't decide on emojis and/or urls and then I died

lmao I just realized I forgot. todd. ALSO BEAST I DIDNT FORGET HER I JUST GAVE UP BEFORE THINKING OF A POST FOR HER 😭 ok sorry I'll go now

[the-nightshade-crypt]

My personal favorite headcanon for Nerdy Prudes Must Die (spoilers, obviously) (I start off with a shit ton of just the actual story before the theory, I'm bisexual and autistic, I'm hyperfixated as fuck and these two are so cute, leave me alone /lh)

Max is obviously in love with Grace. Even if he frames it as just wanting to take her chastity, it's clear that he loves her. I mean, firstly, he defends her from bullying despite her being the nerdiest prude. Max himself says to Pete that nobody is a loser until he says they are, so if Max says Grace isn't one, then she wouldn't be. When she comes over to him in their first scene he asks so fucking sweetly to carry her books, like, batting his eyelashes and such a sweet voice. And when she declines he resorts to his mean bully self.

Grace very clearly does not love Max back. Despite her sexual fantasies, and even the lyric "I think im loving you more than I should" in Dirty Girl, she doesn't love him. Cause that's all they are, fantasies. In Dirty Girl she makes it very clear, with her saying multiple times "I don't/won't care about you". And its clear she doesnt want him to like her either, since her fantasy Max specifically asks her to "love me like you dont care." Showing that she really just wants him so she can give in to her temptations. She only sees him with lust, a symbol of her "sinful" desires. A symbol she wants to get rid of by any means to stay pure.

When Max decides to kill Steph first, he screams "you fucking Judas", which causes Grace to show up and shout "So you do know the Bible!" She then follows that up with "I used to have a crush on another guy who rose from the grave. But Jesus never threw a football like you max!" Despite her saying "crush" I fully believe she didn't mean it that way. She just needed to get him on board with her plan, and she knows how he feels about her.

She finally gets him to leave Steph and Pete alone and they have sex. When she comes back, she's smoking a cigarette and states "I needed that." Max comes out from behind the the wall and gets on his stomach, kicking his fucking feet like a tween girl writing self insert fanfiction, and says "Hey, uh, Grace? Where you going? Don't you wanna cuddle a little bit?" This line alone proves to me that he's in love with her. Compared to someone like Ted Spankoffski, who would never do something as romantic as cuddling after sex (at least not with anyone besides the girl he loves), it's obvious that Max has real feelings...

Only for Grace to say "Oh Max. I just gave you a gift. A very special gift. In fact, I just gave you what I cherish most. My chastity." Not only did she successfully fulfill what the Lord's in Black demanded, though we all know they didn't like that Pete or Steph didn't die, she also got what she wanted... to give into her sinful sexual urges.

With Max screaming that it was worth it, and him gone into the black and white, Grace becomes almost addicted to the power of the Black Book. The end of the musical is her taking over Max's role to kill the people she deems deserve it, in her case, perverts.

Now, my actual theory is that since Grace is directly connected with the Lord's In Black, she can freely go to the black and white, similar to how Miss Holloway seems to be able to. With Max in the Black and white... I like to think he's still actively pining for her. Whenever she visits to talk with the Lord's he's just kinda watching and trying to flirt with her and she's just completely over it. It gets to the point where even the Lord's are irritated. But slowly Grace starts to find his flirting charming. Realizing that since she is working for the Lord's in Black, effectively denouncing her Christianity, there's nothing stopping her from finding someone attractive, or wanting to be with someone. Their relationship at this point might stay as mostly sexual, but she is falling in love.

Maybe she makes a deal with the Lord's to bring him back to life, or maybe she's into fucking ghosts and just asks for that idk but the point is... I like thinking that with her doing the Lord's in Black's bidding, she can see max and actually get to know and fall in love with him.

I just really love the idea of Max being a lovesick himbo babygirl, only for Grace to reject him and be an asshole. But Max is a hopeless romantic who finds it hot that Grace is mean to him and he doesnt take it to heart. He's desperate for a positive relationship, seeing that he says his dad calls him a cuck and is very clearly emotionally/verbally abusive at best, and it kinda seems like Grace wants to be adored by someone, the same way Linda Monroe does.

They are in love your honor

[thesherrinfordfacility]

right let's go, special s2 magnifying glass is deployed (also let's have a moment of silence for how PRECIOUS this moron is, ✨god bless this Mess✨)

- Strip, strip, hooray! possible reference to the 1932 film of the same name, being performed on stage at the Windmill, "A specialist sunbathing camp is threatened by a campaign by the leader of the 'Wear More Clothes League'."

- this one has thrown me for a loop because I cannot find a stage reference to this ANYWHERE, but it reads "Under A ___ Night Sky", and if my eyes do not deceive me, the missing word begins m and ends in s, so... marvellous? miraculous???

- now this is really interesting, bc on appearance it looks to be a simple inverted anchor (and im 95% certain it probably is just an inverted anchor) but it strikes a resemblance to the Omega Cross, which christian symbology indicated that when coupled with alpha represents jesus' beginning and end... but likely it's not going to be that deep (although, we know there is reference in s2 to a second coming? 👀)

- Bastersby or Bartersby or Battersby, Mayfair(?) no indication of this being a real make from online research, but looks very likely to be a hatbox of some kind. EDIT: @lalie is a godsend and confirmed it is Battersby Hats - Wiki and similar hatbox image

- this has also thrown me because this looks to be The Veldt which is a 1950s short story, "...a mother and father struggle with their technologically advanced home taking over their role as parents, and their children becoming uncooperative as a result of their lack of discipline." but i think im misreading it

- AYO THE CAN CAN??? YES PLEASE

none of these things are accurate and none of them are likely to being integral to the plot but drinking in every detail of s2 set design is like supping on a lovely hot soup yummy

[gaytoddhoward]

hi chat im thinking about how cotl having the lamb be. well . a sheep . was very much an intentional choice & how the goat being a goat is also very intentional i think. this is gonna sound insane & rambly if i just type it out so im gonna kinda just make bullet points.

(spoiler alert: i ran out of steam while typing and it ended up just being a bunch of rambling about these funky caprines & symbolism in christianity)

-the [sacrificial] lamb is executed & comes back to life (w enough time having passed for the bishops to leave the immediate area)

-they are literally functioning as gods vessel to spread his faith

-the lamb functions as the shepherd of their flock. jesus is known as the good shepherd & christianity as a flock . iirc . idk im not a christian

ok now this bit is probably mad innacurate bc again im not religious & i never have been, i basically just have this info from wikipedia delves but.

-jesus was the son of god but also like. was god . or an aspect of god anyways. god is like, split into three different parts & jesus was like the incarnation of one of those parts ig?

-pls keep in mind that jesus is symbolically linked w sheep/is the sacrificial lamb of god

- the devil has a few different interpretations/origin stories from my understanding but i think in christianity the accepted take is that hes a fallen angel ? so . would be of god , or like . Was anyways .

-satan/the devil has been associated w (black) goats at least since the middle ages

also

idk i lost my train of thought idk what point i was even going for . i just think the religious parallels r so so cool & its nuts to me that i dont see people talk about it idk . i think the species choices were definitely very very intentional & not just like. little fluffy main character in cult game funny :) alternate universe version of sheep = goat :) idk does anyone see my vision am i cooking do i at least have ingredients here or am i reaching

[beardisable]

OH MY GOD OH MY GOD okay.

so i watched the 8 hour jack stream(jesus) aka watched genloss top to bottom again and listened to his theories and stuff(i really vibe with the "kidnapped as kids" angle more now) and started thinking about some theories he and chat mentioned and.

now im thinking with like. ok its probably a pretty common theory, this post was what prompted this additional idea of mine actually, but ill explain it a bit: the theory that, since sneeg and charlie can come back over and over again, and they have referenced like, refusing to do the cooking challenge in ep 1, and how charlie was playing the mouse trap but ate the cage, they have obviously done the same kind of scenes we saw ranboo do, right. and then in the Announcement video we see the same kind of "missing poster" type headshots of them, with the caption "Found them!"

i dont remember exactly where it was confirmed that showfall made the missing person posters, but like. yeah. these images are for missing posters like ranboo had. and with sneeg being caught by the security in ep 3, he had tried to escape, just like ranboo and charlie. and i feel like this wasnt the first or last time they have tried this!

also, during that screenshot the announcer says "our hero will meet a cast of crazy characters, who you may recognize", aka the audience has seen these "actors" before in other things! this is their first live show but what have they made before...?

then, with one of the Very first lines Ranboo says in the first episode, "it wasn't supposed to be like this"... showfall/hetch made it seem like this is ranboos first show and he's being tested for how well he does as The Hero.

I dont think what we saw is Ranboos first time starring in a showfall production.

its the first live thing like the announcement video said but i think hetch lied when he talked about how its a test, i think Ranboo's been here at least a few go arounds, if not tens/hundreds/thousands of times. WHICH MEANS in the end when he gets his memories back... theres an infinite amount of possibility of things they could remember for what they have been made to do in the past :) Bc remember, while this is comedy->horror, it was still relatively tame and non-explicit (at least by my personal standards?) so it is quite possible they have been in more R rated horror stuff, slashers, gore, actual saw, some kind of even worse psychological horror things, but also that they might have had incredibly good experiences like love and joy and community and anything positive too, and to remember all that in a rush... oh boy so i believe it is a circular reproduction, maybe they run through scenes repeatedly over and over while perfecting every little detail and getting different takes of genuine emotion but every time Real and a First experience... some kind of purgatory(omg christian hell reference) or endless torture or such...

ok that got really maybe unneccessarily angsty so heres my other thought:

i love me a fucking colour theory and colour symbolism! it bothered me a bit how like. in the promo game we get ranboo, then green friend/the villain(obviously charlie, tho the villain part still confuses me a Bit since its not quite true?), the blue friend/the taken(obvs sneeg) and then the red stranger/the saviour. and like it would logically follow that the red is hetch right?

jack when theorising said the titles are self descriptive, which i buy into, at least for the first episode context, charlie is the villain role, sneeg was taken(put in a cage and later snatched by the sharkciclester), and hetch was trying to help and save ranboo from this situation! but then in the second ep we also have red puzzler, and red niki? i WISH niki had. any kind of bigger role to build a Saviour type off of her but i dont think she does :( the puzzler is an option, since they make it seem like the puzzler tries to save ranboo? and thats actually a whole other thought like. since we know hetch was not actually helping ranboo, was the puzzler Genuinely helping them, and somehow showfall found out and killed him?? idk ANYWAYS that colour coding falling apart a bit made me think about how ranboo is also red!! rgb trio yknow??

if the titles are self descriptive... well i dont think Ranboo really felt like The Hero much, especcially not in the end...

I think Ranboo is actually meant to be the Saviour.

Esp with the jesus coding! I believe this kind of thing has happened many times before, with sneeg/charlie/ranboo/others realizing that shits fucked, and trying to escape, only to be caught and put back in the production. I think Ranboo(main character syndrome) was in a previous iteration the Saviour, who tried to help sneeg and charlie and others get out of there, to save them, save everyone. but they failed. got captured. once again waking up again with a "it wasn't supposed to be like this..."

and so the cycle continues, and the content wheel keeps spinning.

(ive only been in tumblr tags so feel free to link me any other ppl who arrived at the same conclusion)

[kienansidhe]

hi, im kienan! im the current host of the disaster hearts system. we are a korean american body with dissociative identity disorder and have had multiple diff hosts over the course of this blogs run. i or some variation of me have been host since around 2017-18ish. for transparencys sake, the body is 25+. do not ask abt age specifics please.

we are a survivor of csa trauma, parental abuse, religious and cult abuse, and generally very traumatized, and our experience of life is irrevocably colored by that lens.

we are disabled and unable to hold a job ever since we got long covid in april of 2020. we are fully dependent on our partners, working on our disability application, and still coming to terms with the reality of being probably permanently disabled.

unless otherwise specified it is probably some variation of kienan speaking.

-♡♡♡-

i, kienan, am queer and i prefer to be addressed by strangers with he/they/it or fae/faeself pronouns. i dont rlly care which of those you use, tho, no need to rotate or anything.

some other labels that generally describe me: nonbinary, transmasc, gnc, cuntboy, [redacted], [redacted], femme, femboy, genderweird, bi, aro/ace with a couple exceptions, sex favorable, kink obligate, freak, degenerate, pervert.

i currently have 4 partners, referred to here as prettyboyfriend, nesting boyfriend, girlfriend/daddy, and moirail.

no dni, i think theyre stupid and the only ppl i would not want to interact would not respect dnis anyways lmao. if i have a problem with you i will just say so or block you or whatever.

some of my beliefs and what to expect on this blog are under the cut.

i believe in rehabilitation and compassion, full stop. yes, even for those people. i think that othering and dehumanizing others sucks, that thoughts do not define you (yes, even those thoughts), and that the only thing that matters is your actions.

i think callouts are never helpful, ever. ive literally never seen one do anything helpful or good.

i try my best to interact with others in good faith, and i expect the same in return.

we were homeschooled in a cult and our education was heavily ~moderated~ to keep us brainwashed, and every time i think ive rooted out all the misinfo new stuff comes up. please be patient with me if i ask stupid questions, i literally am stupid. i have so much literal actual brain damage. i will do my best to be open minded, i rlly want to learn!

i believe that the best ways to combat csa are better sex education, breaking down the sanctity of the nuclear family, youth liberation (more legal rights and self advocacy for children), and not clogging child abuse report portals with fucking fictional art, jesus h christ.

medicalization of identities sucks. sysmeds, transmeds, im sorry youre miserable but thats not an excuse for trying to make everyone else miserable with you.

labels are only useful insofar as they help you connect with others like you and form solidarity in order to combat systemic oppression. if labels make you angry or miserable, consider not taking them so seriously.

its okay to just dislike ppl. its not always that deep. trying to come up with moral reasons to justify disliking ppl is rlly fucking catholic.

dont talk to me abt christianity. im aware that my trauma affects my ability to be compassionate in this area, so im staying in my lane. in fact probably dont talk to me abt religion in general.

im not a proshipper or an anti i touch grass <3, HOWEVER:

antishipping / purity politics / anti-kink / whatever you wanna call it, ppl equating fictional depictions of Obvious Bad Things with condoning, supporting, or normalizing them in real life are fucking stupid and have done unbelievable amounts of damage that has now reached far beyond fandom and kink circles. get a life, for fucks sake.

ppl who call themselves proshippers and then go around harassing antis are fucking stupid and have lost the original spirit of the term proship / anti-anti, which hinged around not harassing or harming others over fiction. get a life, for fucks sake.

just be kind. dont be a dick. treat others how you wanna be treated. we are all traumatized but thats not an excuse to be cruel. leave the world better than you found it.

youre gonna make mistakes. you just are. youre not perfect and also the world is complex. remember that you cant help everyone. try your best but dont lose yourself in the process.

art is everything. the act of creation is holy. more progress is made by creating -- building communities, making art, growing plants, building houses, building relationships -- than by tearing things down. there is probably a time and place for violence, destroying oppressive systems, bombing weapons factories, but if we arent creating a positive, healthy society alongside the destruction we are just leaving fertile ground for new oppressive structures to take root. create. create. create.

-♡♡♡-

many hosts has left a chaotic mess of tags on this blog but here are some we use pretty consistently:

#headspace: original posts. diary rambling, random thoughts, actual semi coherent opinions, anything

#my face: the body

#humans are good actually: reminders

#recovery things: mental health help

#important: there is so much stuff in this tag

#bookmark: too much here too lol

#feel better: just fluffy stuff

#vine: general funny video tag

#about, #me kin id, #i ghostwrote this post: stuff we relate to rlly hard + uquiz tags lol

#posts that are funnier when plural

[queerdiazs]

hi amanda! how are you i come to you with a question you are free to ignore im not from the us and like the rest of the world i have read and seen a lot about the incoming elections , i have understood pretty easily how kamala is the better candidate but i haven seen a lot of people still going with the both partys are bad take( which to me is wild like did we all saw the same debate?) mostly due to palestine but also i saw people saying that queer people in red states are abandoned by the current gov so for them is doesn't make the different because some legistations will still happen. now from what i understand that is something that has to do with federal gov more but i'm not sure so my question is, are red state really abandoned by the current gov or simply they have no power to get involve into certain legislation anti lgtb or do they come from the previous admnistration ?

hi <3 okay so, this is all from my opinion and experience as a white-passing mixed native with a dark skin mother

red states (which is not always synonymous with the southern united states, where i live) have a long history of bigotry against their constituents regardless of what party’s president is elected. democrats tend to pass legislation that protects us at a federal level (like the civil rights act) and republicans usually prefer to leave things at a state level (like trump’s abortion ban).

when it’s put like that, it’s easy to see that the democratic party is more for all the people than republicans. however, there’s a lot of nuance to be taken into consideration here.

the republicans control red states because they know how to get down on the levels of the people in a way that takes advantage of them. they use fear and terror, and the name of god to elicit a strong reaction at the polls. they claim to be the party of jesus, but go against jesus’s word—and it works because most “christians” aren’t really christians and don’t have the mind to question anything. it’s easier to go along with what you’re being told than ask questions.

on the other hand, democrats don’t usually campaign or fight to win red states, which makes it feel like we’ve been left on our own. like, stacey abrams and others worked hard to flip georgia and it paid off, making it a battleground state and proving if attention is paid to us it will be for the better.

there’s a lot of voter suppression in the south and red states. like, in my state, the governor purged over 430k registered voters once he learned kamala was leading in the most populace county. there’s also only a certain number of voting polls that aren’t conveniently close to most people; the polls also don’t stay open long enough for a lot of people who work, though early voting is a decent way to combat that.

lack of education also plays a major role in everything. it’s easy to keep people in the mines or the factories, exploiting workers for little pay, because educating them would mean they know they’re being taken advantage of. this is an issue for both parties, in my opinion.

in my experience, again, as a queer mixed native in a red state, i can say both parties are bad because that’s my truth. it’s different for somebody in a typically blue state, like new york or california, though, and i respect that. however, i am going to vote blue no matter what.

so to sum it up, the democrats don’t seem to care to put in the work to understand or win red states and the republicans weaponize our lack of education and poverty for their gain. both parties are bad and no politician should ever be idolized. however, it is in our best interest to vote blue in this election for a plethora of reasons.

the link to stacey abrams by the way: https://representcollaborative.com/stories/meet-the-black-women-who-flipped-georgia. it wouldn’t let me imbed it for some reason.

[roughdaysandart]

Too giddy NOT to share my edit of the smut from ch 5!

I am so happy with how this revised script for the comic turned out but jesus christ i think i spent at least 5 hours editing it, but im so glad i could keep alot of the dialouge while adding a super meaninngful message/point in the sequence. I wouldnt consider it an entireley new piece of work though im not sure, because the original message of RD dialoge and such is still there so i hope it doesnt seem like im insertin goto much or somehow taking away from the story? Im trying my best with what I got people, theres only so much smut you can hide before it becomes an entireley new scene

original: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21651097/chapters/52366960

*Tb= thought/speech bobble note/conversion

*Nar Sq= make/convert to narrative square

I will link the original ch 5 (or its also on @no-droids page), but will only paste the part i heavily edited (basically the last part) for your reading pleasure! ok so without furthur adeu..

----------------------------------------------------

Rough Day by @no-droids: Abridged for Christian Roomates by Roughdaysandart

Chapter 5: Of metal and Men (or at least the last half of it)

“Excuse me,” you say after a second, trying your best to sound appalled.  You carefully remove the death gauntlets with your hands extended as far away from your face as possible, fingers spread and thumb held completely rigid in position.  “Are you actually laughing at the fact that I almost just died horrifically in front of you?”

“Stars, just—” he lifts his head back up to look at you, “—come ‘ere.  You’re worse than the kid is, I swear.”

You slowly stand up, and the boots are so big around your ankles that you don’t even have to kick them off, you can just leave them there in position on the floor as you lift your feet and begin walking over to him.  

TB: HA-you just got me on an off day, i've got battle wounds still healing everywhere.“I’ll have you know I am a fierce bounty hunter—”

“Terrifying,” he mutters, and you’re about halfway done untying his cape when you get close enough for him to reach out and snatch the bottom of it, swiftly yanking you down on top of him and removing the fabric from your throat at the same time.  He ignores your dramatic choking noise, catching your flailing body with barely a grunt.  “Craziest in the guild.  Your first kill was yourself.”

“Yeah, I—ack!” you giggle as he immediately flips you around, downright shocked at the ease with which he maneuvers you back to the ground and leans closer into your immediate view, “haha—I bring them in warm, or I bring them in–HWA–.”

“Stop,” you can (NAR SQ:) hear his smile through the helmet

He catches each of your wrists and moves them aside. You both stay like that for an unknown amount of time, but likely just a few seconds, something catching in the dim air.

“Know something?” Mando starts.

“Wait—” you try to wiggle upwards at noticing the fresher’s light still intruding on the hull.  It’s futile, of course, because (TB): probably your entire body weight is now on you with his ammo belt as it slings around your chest.  “Wait, h-hang on—the fresher’s still open.”

“So?”

“....So I can see you right now with the light, and I liked—”  .

NAR SQ: You want to say that you liked–no, just needed to hear and feel his voice in moments like this, like before, his real voice. Soft but rhythmic in its tone, not having nearly as much of its fullness conveyed against your ears by the modulator. And how much you craved it in that way. Likely, noone has heard his voice in decades, and so you feel connected, that much more intimate with him because of it.; even when you're not touching, the unfiltered words feel like an unseen extension of him that you want to have here, right now, as his face is so achingly close to yours. 

Is the reciprocal true, too? Is it just as exotic and healing, just as addicting for him? Taking off his helmet, his creed, not just for you, but for his own enjoyment too? Having that closeness….

…..only with you?

“…I-I liked—”

“Do you want me to take my helmet off?”  “Hm?  Or do you want to stay like this?”

It takes you a second to realize (TB:) he’s waiting for an answer.

“Uh—”  (TB:) Stars, what kind of harrowing, existentially crippling question is this? Is he serious? Of course you want it off, doesn't he too? But the entirety of your being refuses to move a muscle from here, risk leaving this fragile moment for anything at all, even with that desire for his voice.  “Uhhhh…”  You legitimately feel torn, blinking up at the visor and noticing the struggle blatantly written all over your reflection.  (TB:) Why in Maker’s name would he put this on you?

“I know you want it off” he admits quietly, and you flick your eyes to look at him slowly.  

“Yeah but, wait–” you start to get up, freeing a hand from his press to support the lift upwards “—let me turn off the light.  Please.” But his continued grip on your other wrist keeps it and you sitting on the ground.

“But I want to see you right now” he says, letting out a tsk in playful dissaproval, “and you still want it off, you trying to make me break my code?”

“Never. Just…..look at me when we go up later instead, and all the other times were out, j-just take your helmet off while we still can now. ” 

 “No, I want to see you now.  First.  We’re almost to Corellia, and I’m not risking my life on another hunt until I can remember every detail of you before I go for Maker knows how long again.”

“You decide that timeline,” you remind him, surprised at the ease in which his arm, still clasping your other wrist, gives in when you maneuver it with your free hand, just upwards between your chests. 

“No way you're seeing me any good with the ship's lights, even with all of them on. You’ll be able to see me best once we get there if that's what you want, and it’ll be faster too.” You firmly hold his forearm up as he continues to grip your other wrist, your sternness and posture completely contradicting your uncoordinated and awkward demeanor from before.

You're both hunched in facing each other with the position, each pair of legs triangled and shifting to adjust whenever your entwined arms and hands slightly move up or down. Like a game of arm-wrestling…only on the ground, in the dark, and with absolutely zero consideration for size-matching. 

“But I don't want it to be faster,” he counters, “I want to see you now and take you in before I’m gone. You don't like that?”

His arm goes to guide your wrist back down, but halts at the unexpected resistance you give and you stare into what you know are his eyes through the visor, him surely seeing yours clearly with the fresher light now dimly illuminating your face.

“You see me all the time. I don't get this except for a few hours a day, if even. So who needs what more, hmm?” 

NAR SQ: You know nonverbal communication gets things through to him easier. After all, words are not his forte, and he almost never speaks to others besides you and the kid. And though you're entirely out of your opponent's weight-class, you know you can go toe to toe with him in other ways, And you're determined to redeem yourself after how you embarrassed yourself with that fall earlier.

“I have to earn credits somehow, I can’t just—” he abruptly cuts himself off when you suddenly exert a force to the left, jerking both of your arms a little outwards, “—I… I-I can’t just stay on this ship with you f-forever and… and…” Mando spouts, sounding more dumbfounded after the unexpected change in direction, missing a second before adjusting his hold back to its original place between you both. 

NAR SQ: You know he is ridiculously strong, unimaginably stronger than you no doubt, and could just force your hand down in an instant, stop the discussion altogether no questions asked, but he doesn't. Your stark change in attitude seemingly distracts his mind enough for him to forget that fact. His arm just stays suspended and rigid, only twitching downwards whenever your strength manages to lift the entanglement of arms slightly.

“You can do whatever you want” you reason.  “Whenever you want. That was made clear before. All I’m asking is that right now, you let me have you to myself in the dark a little while longer.  Is that okay?”

You twist inward and clasp the unwavering forearm tighter, matching your mouth’s escalating boldness with increasing grip and force beyond your feat of already supporting the heavy weight of his arm in addition to his comparatively small resistance against yours. It’s not hard enough to hurt him (as if you could), just enough to slightly waiver the vertical direction he is struggling to remember to sustain, but also hard enough that your curled fingers and nails will likely leave some sort of mark on his exposed, only human skin, thick leather gloves and impenetrable Beskar no longer a factor.

Nobody will ever be able to see such marks, but somehow that makes it even funnier.  A secret only you and him know.  Next time he scares off a crowd of locals, he’ll be wearing your signet under his armor. It's a laughably small battle scar, nothing close to those from years of bloody victories littering his skin, but you figure it'll probably mean more to him than any of them ever would.

“Is that okay?”  You ask him once more, trying your best to sound sweet as the pressure in your forearm rises.  “Will you let me turn off the light, Mando?”

“ack—” he grits“—why are you—why do you always make everything s-so much better and worse for me?”

“Didn't you hire me to make it better for you and the kid?” you tell him.

“Not like this,” he remarks, tipping his head.  “Not—not everything, n-not all the time.”

 “Keep talking,” you half-giggle, grunted voice revealing the amount of effort you didn't realize you were exerting, and you adjust your neck and posture inward with the tension, hunching to still keep eye contact with the visor.  “I like hearing you talk, you don't do it enough.”

NAR SQ: Not nearly enough

A moment of silence follows,and (TB:) you wonder if he didn't hear that last bit at all. But on the chance that he is just as stunned as you are at your brazenness, you decided to press.

“You’re so tense, do you want me to stop?” you force with a grin, trying to ignore your now straining muscles.

“I want to see you bef–,” he grits in meager defiance.  “You—you can’t just talk nice and expect me t—”

You look up at him further, “Just let me turn off the light Mando, I'll be quick, I promise” you murmur, blinking up at him.  “Please?”

“T-That bad, h-huh?” 

“L-let me–ack–,"your muscles burn with searing pain,"p–phrase it l-like this,” but you're too invested to think about anything but just speaking. “I-I’d gouge my eyes out if it meant you'd take it off right now, even with the fresher light on.”

Mando’s helmet swings to the side and bobs, and you just know the look on his face must be more priceless than it already is. Immediately the intentional  tension in his arm gives as he stutters, “you–what the–w-what? WHAT?”

The sudden absence of resistance means that your force instantly lifts his arm along and your captive wrist, instantly relieving the bottled up pressure in your arms, as well as the pressure built and burst by your outrageous remark.

NAR SQ: And now you laugh at him. 

An explosive, stomach-curling laugh that is only amplified by your shortened breath and adrenaline, sometime managing to breath out that you cant believe that got him. Right there in his face, and eventually forcing you to roll on your back, only your grasp on his outstretched forearm grounding you to reality. A deep roar coming from your chest then moving higher in your throat as you gradually manage to compose yourself after what must have been at least 30 seconds. Though the hypoxia and subsequent giggles don't leave any time soon.

When you brush your hair from your eyesight, you can tell Mando’s arms are slumped over his bent legs. You can tell he's trying to look unamused at his defeat, despite the fact that neither of you can see each other well right now, but know that he's laughing too with the way you see the silhouette of his chest bounce as he studies your shameless victory-cry on the floor. 

“Keep doing that and you'll be emptying the fresher” he eventually warns, though his voice sounds nothing close to as serious and unamused as his shadowed posture would like to convey.

You inhale and strain to slow your breathing as you pull yourself back to sit and face him again, practically gasping for air. “Wait,wait,wai-” you inhale deeply, catching as much oxygen as you can this time, ”I’m sorry-ha-.” You then finally release his forearm, only now realizing you were the only one with any grip anymore. “That’s got to be the least threatening thing you’ve ever said to someone, I think.”

“Not able to scare you off, apparently.  Most people run from me.”

“Nope.  Told you I wouldn’t, remember?  Back on Cantonica.” you take a moment to scoot yourself closer, his neck bending to adjust to the change.  “I’m also the craziest bounty hunter in the guild, so.  Look.”  You lift up to show him.  “I even have an ammo belt, see?  It holds all of the bullets, for all of my guns that I have.”

His hand slowly comes up and you think he’s going to grab the band of leather across your chest to either take it off you or pull you forward with it, but then he just grabs the bend between your neck and shoulder to gently squeeze it instead.  

“...You’re beautiful.”

Your breath catches.  You blink twice at him, your heart suddenly thundering under his hold.

“When you're sleep deprived or delirious, when you're awake and way too clever like this, whenever you're just talking to me or the kid.”

His large hand around your bend gently pulls your torso up against his, the other coming to make its way over your other arm and resting on your upper back.  

NAR SQU: The world would have you believe he’s a monster, a lifeless droid or cold-blooded creature under all his drapes and metal exterior. But the warm body softly embracing you right now reinforces what you already know. He’s just a man. Alive, like you. His touch giving you life, just as much life as his unmodulated voice does, the only thing keeping you apart being just metal, which just so happens to perfectly fit the shape of your cheek.

“When I can see you or in complete darkness.  You’re beautiful.”

You stare at the fresher light past him as your head is cradled in the crook of his neck, any sense of thought going numb at the softest, warmest feeling you think you've ever felt deep in your chest.

NAR SQU: You think—for one ludicrous, insane second, you think that the enormous swelling in your chest literally transfers itself up to your brain and causes you to have an aneurysm right there. But nope—it’s just

The entire hull starting to violently shift and shake, swerving sideways and jerking upwards with rapid, unpredictable shifts in gravity.

You’re ungracefully thrown on, over and past, him towards the side of the hull like a ragdoll in the chaos, trying to find some sort of stable ground when you accidentally knee him in his side with the end of the turbulent shift.  Mando grunts and is thrown against you when the ship immediately veers the other way, the sudden impact of him squishing you against the hull wall crushing your lungs and making it impossible to breathe with the brutal changes in g-force.  Did he—did he leave the baby in the cockpit?

……He left the baby in the cockpit.

[vatican3]

this is a long one and your ask box is a confessional now. to start off; im not christian. i was raised christian but thats just not the life for me. secondly; my name is judas. this makes christians uncomfortable as well. last thing before we get into the meat of it; i am also not a satanist but i do still dabble in it from time to time. so off the bat your more die hard christians would Not like me. like i said i have a very complicated relationship with christianity; i hate god and god hates me. i do things specifically to spite him and i call him out on his bullshit all the time. however; this does not extend to jesus. this is where the more complicated part comes in. i am not a christian, i do not worship god nor the holy spirit or any saints or anything like this, and my relationship and connection to jesus i view more as an extension of my worship of dionysus more than anything else. i dont know what this all entails, im still exploring this, but despite all my disdain towards christianity i cannot get myself to extend this to jesus. and its haunted me for years and years until i finally started to accept that. and more recently ive stopped trying to fight the nature of my relationship to jesus and lean into it. and my exploration of my worship of dionysus has helped as well; a lot of people connect the two in their own ways and i personally view them as two sides of the same coin. and through this ive just started to accept that my relationship with him is inherently queer, sensual and erotic even. god, to me, has always been rough, cruel, and uncaring, taking away whatever support he has given me at the drop of a hat if i do something that he doesnt agree with. a cold hand. but jesus was never like that yk? always kind and caring, a guiding hand, never let go even if i stopped and went back. a soft, tender lover. ive cried and hes responded to my pain with gentle touches. always forgiving, never judging. ive felt guilt over my sexual fixation on him; weight on my shoulders for years. trying to ignore it and bury it. but the second i gave up and accepted it i felt free. my name had no connection to its origin when i initially chose it; it just fit like a glove when i tried it. but the more i go down this weird path the more i realize that it fits more than i thought. its nice. but i dont think your average christian would appreciate my views.

This has been in my inbox for a day and I've reread it a few times, and I don't know if you're looking for religious counsel or maybe just to get your thoughts out (evoking the image of a confessional implied you were interested in a response specifically from my point of view, or some sort of direction, but if that's not what you want, stop reading after the cut?) So I'll try to answer as an anthropologist and theologian before answering as myself.

First and foremost, and the part I'm sure you're familiar with, you are far from the only person that has a convoluted and difficult relationship with religion--so the good news is that you're not alone! Even among the most devout Christians there is unrest, doubt, feelings of loneliness and despair. And those people seem to know what they're about. So for someone that has an unfavorable history with Christianity and no longer identifies with it, it only makes sense to feel such a varied and complex array of emotions about specific aspects.

I don't even necessarily think that it's abnormal to feel there is an erotic element to your relationship with Jesus. St. Teresa of Avila experienced her "spiritual ecstasy"--

In his hands, I saw a great golden spear, and at the iron tip there appeared to be a point of fire. This he plunged into my heart several times so that it penetrated to my entrails. When he pulled it out I felt that he took them with it, and left me utterly consumed by the great love of God. The pain was so severe that it made me utter several moans. The sweetness caused by this intense pain is so extreme that one cannot possibly wish it to cease, nor is one’s soul content with anything but God. This is not a physical but a spiritual pain, though the body has some share in it—even a considerable share. [Article on that.]

Your stance is, yes, unorthodox (haha). And it's true that many Christians would shy away from and admonish everything you have going on here--not all of them! I think you have some interesting concepts going on with your personal spirituality that don't necessarily speak to me as a human being but that I think would be interesting to do some writing about, if you care to.

The story of Jesus and Judas is a love story. What kind of love story it is can be up to interpretation, and that's a wonderful thing to me. And I think that's something that you have certainly considered between your name and your personal theology.

On an objective level, I believe that if this is good for you this is good for you and that it is then worth exploring. If you like what Jesus as a man and as a symbol encompasses, you should include that in your own spiritual life--and it sounds like you are! You can love Jesus without being a Christian. Many people do.

i hate god and god hates me. i do things specifically to spite him and i call him out on his bullshit all the time.

God does not hate you. God doesn't hate anyone, that's kind of the deal. You could do the most morally bankrupt nonsense and still God would be there for you. I think a lot of the other things I would want to say on this topic come off as though I would be trying to convert you (I'm not) and would be better in, like, an essay, so I'll leave that be.

This is a genuine question, not that you have to answer but if you'd like to please feel free: how are you, as someone that isn't Christian and doesn't worship a Christian God, qualifying what exactly God's bullshit is? What goes into that category? Is there something worth examining there?

my relationship and connection to jesus i view more as an extension of my worship of dionysus more than anything else. [...] a lot of people connect the two in their own ways and i personally view them as two sides of the same coin.

I'd love to know more about this. I don't know much about Dionysus as a figure nor Dionysian worship so I'm interested in how people make the connection/what that does for them and their spirituality. I know you said you're still exploring this and figuring out what it means for you so ofc no pressure to bare your soul or anything, but again if you have any specific thoughts to share go wild.

god, to me, has always been rough, cruel, and uncaring, taking away whatever support he has given me at the drop of a hat if i do something that he doesnt agree with. a cold hand. but jesus was never like that yk? always kind and caring, a guiding hand, never let go even if i stopped and went back.

Bizarre to me to so readily separate God and Christ. But I do understand that Jesus is easier to empathize with as a man, we have stories of his life, joy, and suffering. Jesus is also divine, though--you could even view him as a bridge between us and God, in a way. I don't know your personal journey. But it's easy to mistake, sometimes, God telling you the path you're on is wrong for you as God denying you or revoking support from you.

This was a really interesting message! I hope you feel that I've engaged with it fairly. Do you have any beef with the Holy Spirit or is it just the God/Jesus split you struggle with?

[safety-pin-punk]

im curious, how does being punk affect your feeling of religion? are you still a practicing catholic/go to church?

Hahahahahaha oh boy, buckle in cause this is gonna be a fun ride. I’ll put a cut cause this is gonna be long simply due to the amount of context that is needed to understand how I’ve managed to mash these two things together in my life. I hope this answers your question anon! (And thank you for asking nicely, that usually isn’t the reaction I get).

So, for reference, I am Catholic born and raised. My mom is Catholic, my dad is only recently exploring being religious. My brother has remained a Catholic good boy throughout his life, my sister has denounced religion. I’m somewhere between them. I don’t go to church often, but I still feel at home there when I do (most of the time). So technically, I’m not a ‘Practicing Catholic’ because of that, but I’m following my faith to the best of my ability (explained below).

I 100% believe there is a god, and because of that my faith has had some rough intersections with other parts of my life, such as being punk, the communities Im a part of, and being heavily involved in STEM. And those are things that took me years to figure out for myself. When just looking at being punk though, I think where it really clicked that punk wasn’t against my religion, but actually supports it, was in my freshman year of college. Like I’ve said before, I go to a Protestant school so every class has to somehow have at least one connection to religion (as a chemistry major this can get extremely annoying). But that year, I had a history class as a gen ed, Western Civ to 1450, and an absolutely kick ass professor to go with it. 

This class was the game changer for 18 year old me (oh my god that was 5 years ago). We spent a lot of time in this class talking about religions of ancient civilizations, and of course we talked about Christianity. And this man went absolutely feral. He was the man that introduced me to the concept of ‘Jesus was a punk’. And when you ignore all the random bull shit that comes out of people’s mouths at church and just look at the bible... yeah, he was right. Jesus flipped tables, he ate with societal outcasts like prostitutes and the homeless, and god did he hate the Roman government that controlled so much of the world at that time. 

And I think that’s when I really felt free to embrace the punk culture. The one thing that was holding me back was gone. I also later learned that professor had a metal band (I’m now going to have to try to find his youtube again lol - its been years). 

But yeah, being punk and religious in 2022 is hard. Its hard because the people who claim to be Christians are ignorant, refuse to learn, don’t know the context of the book they call holy, refuse to understand where Christianity stems from and our roots in Judaism, and keep trying to interpret the bible in a modern world (the bible can’t tell you shit about the evils of the internet man). I don’t particularly like going to church because I often find that its a snake pit disguised as a hospital. Though, that’s nothing new, if you ever take the time to read Romans (my favorite part of the bible), its full of Paul just absolutely loosing his ever loving shit because of how corrupt the churches are. 

So instead of going to church once every seven days and conforming to the rest of the vipers there, I try to live my life by Jesus’ standards for interacting with others. Be kind and forgiving, try to understand other points of view, don’t discriminate based on job, color, socioeconomic status, gender, how many kids, ect. Moral of the story, in my opinion, to be a good Christian, you need to treat people as people, and welcome them with open arms. You need to give back to your community. You need to fight for a better world. You need to push back against oppressive and authoritarian governments. And those are all punk values as well.

[kylermalloy]

im so curious of ur attack of titan presentation. 👁️

In reference to this post

Omg Yuki—the way I genuinely considered sitting down and making a PowerPoint presentation 😂

I won’t. I could—but I won’t.

There’s a ton of cute presentations on this website about “why you should watch this show uwu it’s so good and the characters are adorable and it’s got a great message you’re gonna love it!” and, well…that’s not Attack on Titan for me.

Aot is…a curiosity to me. I do really like a lot of the characters, the animation and music are gorgeous, and the story is sufficiently intriguing. And yes, ultimately, it does have a message I can get behind (War Is Bad. Stick to the classics.) but it wasn’t a show that grabbed me instantly. I had to simmer in it for a while—and I do mean a while.

I suppose mostly what I want to talk about is the Disk Horse, which I kind of hate to do because tumblr is allergic to nuance—but. I also like to talk. So here I go.

(This is going under a cut because I CANNOT shut up. Also, I’m going to get into some dumb fandom drama nonsense and I would like to hide that in order to maintain my dignity.)

I actually first became aware of aot BECAUSE of the discourse. I had more posts on my dash claiming that it was a Bad Show and Don’t Watch It than posts that…actually told me anything about it.

Eventually as I started easing into exploring anime, I decided to check it out. Out of morbid curiosity, mostly. I wanted to know what was so bad about it.

For the first three seasons, I was a little clueless. An annoying protagonist with questionable morals? Main characters attached to some sort of military organization? The protagonist being the Exceptional One, the savior because of his unique abilities? …guys, these are all standard shonen tropes, and I’d only watched like…five animes at that point (I’ve now watched, like, ten. My immersion rate is s l o w.)

Then I reached the end of season 3, and I wen “ohhh.” Not because everyone who’d been insisting it was Bad were right, but because I could actually, finally see what they were talking about.

I hear the word “allegory” get thrown around a lot when it comes to aot, and…honestly, I don’t think that’s the right word. An allegory is a direct, deliberate parallel with either a real life event, or another story. Aot is not an allegory of anything. Now, does it use some real life elements as worldbuilding and narrative devices in its own story? Yes, and sometimes to a “yikes” effect.

But this is a fantasy story that takes place in a fantasy world about races of people that don’t exist. The parallels can be drawn, but it’s not an intentional allegory.

Think of the difference between Lord of the Rings and the Chronicles of Narnia. C.S. Lewis was very clear both in his writing and when talking about his work that it was a Christianity allegory. Aslan represents Jesus—created the world, died for its sins, all knowing, all powerful, does not always intervene, eventually edged out by a false god at the end of the world, etc. etc.

Tolkien’s Lord of the Rings took a lot of inspiration from his experiences in World War I. Read anything about LOTR, or watch any of the movies’ supplemental material, and that’s one of the first things you’ll hear. BUT—did old John Roald Roald intend it to be a one-to-one allegory? No.

The orcs are not the Germans. Humans and elves aren’t the English and French. This is not a fantasy retelling of real-world events—it uses elements of real-world warfare to enhance its own narrative. The faces in the Dead Marshes. Frodo’s life-altering trauma. The hobbits’ return to an unchanged safe haven, only to find they have changed irrevocably. Sam’s/Faramir’s introspection on the “evil” of the men they fight.

Aot does the latter, not the former. And while using imagery we associate with Jewish persecution and the holocaust…isn’t a choice I would have made when writing a story, it wasn’t a deliberately anti-Semitic choice.

We can talk all day long about how it’s not a wise choice, and how the implications can have ramifications—but this wasn’t something the mangaka did out of long-held prejudice, whether conscious or unconscious. I mean, do you really walk away thinking we’re supposed to HATE the Eldians? (If so, get better reading comprehension.)

I guess that’s what my Attack on Titan presentation should really be—teaching people how to read and therefore understand the themes and story correctly. Either that, or I could just make a ship chart and explain why Armin deserves to bang every single character, and in what order he should do so.

[thesherrinfordfacility]

LWA: Regarding the halo: we see a variant in the Job minisode. When Aziraphale does his "avaunt" speech, he has a full-body aureole, which unlike the halo around the head is /not/ an angelic attribute in religious painting and sculpture. The design of Aziraphale's aureole, with golden rays emanating from his body, looks like it was modeled on Marian iconography, as in the case of the Virgin of Guadalupe (https://www.metmuseum.org/art/collection/search/635401). There are a bunch of other examples, like the Madonna of Humility at the Getty Museum, where both the Virgin and God have ray aureoles. I am not sure where the design team thought they were going with this, although it fits with the Madonna pose they used for that promotional photo of Aziraphale in his Job robes.

ahhhhh this is so interesting!!!✨ i had no idea before this that there was such a nuance between aureole and halo, and their individual meanings in iconography (and thats not even taking into account different individual depictions like mandorla etc!). given the - as ive now learnt - very subtle but definite distinction between the two, and their individual meanings in religious contexts, it seems reasonable that the design team might have gone to some lengths to research it similarly!!!

(and now i shall spam you all with research because i am excited and Must Share)

so as LWA, the oracle of all truth, has said - ep2 where aziraphale appears to crawley shows him with an aureole surrounding him, much like the multiple depictions of Our Lady of Guadalupe (above is the Virgin of Guadalupe, by Salcedo, 1779). other depictions/notable copies of the original however include:

(L-R: de Arellano, 1691, Gonzalez, c. 1698, and the original from cy/16th, upon which they're based which, as far as i can find, has no confirmed artist?).

and coming back to italian renaissance (which im slightly more familiar with), the following works show the same:

(L-R: Madonna and Child with Two Saints, Pisanello, c. 1445, The Last Judgement, Michelangelo, f. 1541, and Baptism of Christ, Verrocchio and da Vinci, c. 1475)

it is especially prevalent in christian religious art, but as LWA said it does appear to be mostly used for religious figures, and not necessarily angels or saints (most of those are depicted with halos instead). most examples, like the ones above, that ive found seem to be used exclusively for jesus and mary. in other religions such as buddhism, aureola appear to be shown in the form of a mandorla (an almond-shaped field) that surround enlightened beings, such as Buddha.

let's move onto halos; ep6 shows our funky angel removing his, and is shown in the form of a ring, emitting the same kind of light as the aureole. disks have been depicted in art from well before the time of christ, including in ancient egypt (ra) and in iran (mithra).

funnily enough, finding depictions of ring halos rather than disk/plate ones was actually quite difficult? either way - above shows Virgin of the Rocks by da Vinci, f. 1486, shows a subtle but clear ring halo over Mary's head. keeping with the cy/15-16th onwards for fair comparison, showing a combination of disk and ring halos:

(L-R: Branchini Madonna, di Paolo, 1427, Madonna of the Book, Botticelli, c. 1481, and Deposition of Christ, Raphael, 1507)

these all again are examples depicting christ and mary, so what about angels? i found the best example to look at is the annunciation to mary, as this was the subject of a number of notable pieces in the same time period:

(L-R: da Vinci, f. 1476, Fra Angelico, 1450, and Botticelli c. 1490)

all show gabriel with a halo around their head, as opposed to an aureole. the one that fascinated me though is botticelli; there is relatively little known about his depictions of the annunciation, but there are multiple - the above is in glasgow, there is another in new york, and the last is the Cestello Annunciation). however, in the first two, glasgow and new york, there is a clear feature of an aureole-type shaft of light coming from behind gabriel, and shining upon mary.

i certainly think that it's mostly representative of god's gift being bestowed on her, ("The Holy Ghost shall come upon thee, and the power of the Highest shall overshadow thee.", Luke 1:35) but the perspective of the glasgow painting almost shows like the light comes from a crack in the wall, and would suggest that aziraphale stepping out from the aureole as some sort of glorified portal is a mirror of this.

anyway, because ive rambled on long enough about nothing truly insightful; what is the point in these two different displays? well, from my research, it seems to be that aureola are used to surround the head or the body, and iconographically represent divinity, glory and, depending on the subject/context, enlightenment.

but given that it has largely been reserved in art for the depictions of the holy trinity as well as mary, to outright use it in connection with aziraphale seems... strange. in this particular scene, or part of his story, why has he been purposefully elevated to the same level of importance and power? we have no reason to suspect from the ensuing dialogue that god sent aziraphale deliberately in her name to thwart crowley, carrying her power... or did she?

the halo however appears to be specifically used for instances of depicting angels or saints (in the case of gabriel and various apostles in multiple artworks), as well as jesus and mary. so that to me would suggest that halos are somewhat specifically meant to represent innate saintliness and holiness, inherent divine nature. were specifically touched by god's grace and love, and were embodiments of god's will.

what this necessarily means in relation to aziraphale though, beyond him obviously being an angel, a representative of the heavenly host, and a messenger of god's will etc... im not entirely sure.

there is presumably no reason for him to be depicted with an aureole unless, as LWA suggests, it's to draw parallels to artwork where mary is especially shown as having one. but in the context of s2 (and the job minisode), isn't this a little out of field?

another thing - aziraphale does seem to be able to turn it on and off like a tap, suggesting that it's there in the narrative for sheer Impressiveness, to Look The Part, in front of a demon... so, is it only for design purposes, because cinematically it's bloody cool to look at? or is it meant to give insight into aziraphale's thoughts and beliefs?

with it, would he (in aziraphale's mind, bless) look intimating enough to thwart crawley's 'nefarious plan' with minimal effort? possibly, but i doubt it; im a pretty firm believer in Reasons for certain design choices, especially ones that would take a lot of post-production work to animate. so, could aziraphale have chosen to appear with the aureole, to be suitably intimidating, but after having his faith in god's will shaken after the events of job, chose not to manifest it again, because its symbolism no longer rings true for him?