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#im not tipsy anymore but honestly i feel drunk on just the feeling of being desired by someone and touch and all that shit
jonny-b-meowborn · 1 year
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Hi today. Things happened. Good lord (positive)
#basically my cousin's cute friend did show up#and. well.#we were left alone for a while bc cousin and her bf went to a night store for more alcohol#and we had a respectful chat about basically. thinking the other is hot. he straight up said hes into me. respectfully#and later when cousin and her bf came back she asked what did she miss and the cute friend was like 'oh just rizzing your cousin' kdbdndnxn#and from that point we spent most of the time cuddling#like proper cuddling like. first i was just leaning on him and he hugged my waist#but it gradually went to#hes sitting behind me and im half laying down between his legs on his torso and hes holding my waist and putting his head on mine#so like. yeah#yeah im normal about everything#he even tried to kiss me at one point but im not a kissing person#he was very respectful about that tho. after he did smooch me next to my lips.#like he apologized immediately and didnt try again but we still cuddled#and later later we like swapped and he was laying on me#like girl. hot damn#tho i do very much prefer being the hugged person lmao it was still cool as fuck#and like hes tall. so tall. i love tall people. felt really comfy and safe in his arms. good lord#im didnt get drunk today but i did get a lil silly after drinking. mostly just sleepy and more open to touch#im not tipsy anymore but honestly i feel drunk on just the feeling of being desired by someone and touch and all that shit#like im ace in a way so cuddling real close and kisses not on my mouth is i think the most im okay with#and i do like that physical attention but i dont really get any ever#its a really good feeling to know that someone finds me attractive. and to just cuddle about that#praying he wont see this lmaoo#theres no reason he would but i do still remember how my friend i had a genuine crush on found and read my posts about her lmao#but yeah i don think i ever shared my tumblr w him. good#anyway it was a great evening and my brain is still short circuiting#bee buzz
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ridiasfangirlings · 7 months
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yata drinking for the first time? like actually vodka shots not just cocktails or beers like smirinoff becayse theyre rlly good honestly and im
I could see Yata getting drunk the first time he tries shots just because he assumes that hey, they’re small, that means I can have more and it won’t affect me that much, right? He probably does this outside Bar Homra because Kusanagi would definitely stop him before things get too hairy. Maybe he goes out with the Homra guys to another bar at some point (they got kicked out of Homra for the moment for being too rowdy when Anna’s trying to sleep). Yata orders a cocktail and the Homra alphabet are ribbing him about it a little, like come on Yata now that you can drink you can do more than girl drinks. Yata’s a little nervous because his first drink was probably one that Kusanagi prepared for him knowing that Yata would like it, and Yata’s mostly stuck with Kusanagi’s recommendations so far. He wants to show how cool he is though and that he’s not a kid anymore so he’s like fine, give me some shots.
Initially I think Yata might not be thrilled with the taste, especially if he’s used to having his alcohol mixed with other things that make it a little sweeter. The Homra guys are all cheering him on though so he keeps tossing them back, assuming the alcohol in these must not be very strong since he doesn’t even feel a little tipsy. By the time the alcohol actually kicks in he’s probably had more than he should, but of course by this point most of the Homra guys are drunk too so there’s no one to stop him. I imagine them all wandering drunkenly down the street singing loudly, Yata’s super into it and the guys who aren’t as drunk as the rest just think it’s funny. This lasts until they get back to Bar Homra and Kusanagi just takes one look at Yata’s flushed cheeks and facepalms all really guys. I imagine after this though maybe Kusanagi himself does treat Yata to some shots just to show him how to drink them, Yata’s wary after the last experience but he ends up enjoying it when done in moderation (also I could see Fushimi not being fond of shots so Yata totally likes this as a way of one-upping him).
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deyisacherry · 5 months
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don't know if im the only one who knows when an idea in the show is being discarded or just happened once and when they stop talking about it it's mostly because it won't happen again
or when some character denies something over and over as a way to say "stop, that's not true, stop talking about it"
silly example? sun with roxy
yeah Moon was joking with Sun (i didn't like the joke i wanted to bonk him), but some people took Sun rejection at the idea of still being in love with Roxanne as a "i am in love with her but i don't wanna admit it" and they were a loooot saying that he still liked her and they were gonna be together and yadda yadda
while i was clearly seeing Sunny say "I DON'T LIKE ROXANNE ANYMORE, I AM NOT IN LOVE WITH HER" as an honest thing
sometimes actions speak louder than words, so hey, Sun said once a su1c1dal thought, and it was when Old Moon recently died and got reset wich brought us New Moon
the next days, weeks? he was still in distress, seeing bloodmoon, seeing old moon? yeah, it is completely normal because he went through a lot of things recently, he k1lled bloodmoon, he snapped at lunar, he went for eclipse, he argued with old moon, he was trapped by old moon, he saw bloodmoon mocking him, he snapped again, he went to eclipse, he tried to k1ll him, eclipse made him snap too, he destroyed the magic pool thing, he thought he trapped moon forever, the spell wasn't working because he was seeing bloodmoon again, he comes back and then finds out his brother got reset, lunar died and the cherry on top! eclipse had the star
he was broken, YES, HE WAS
he's totally better now? NO he isn't
he's still as broken as before? NO.
Sun is doing better, HE IS, the alcohol thing for god's sake was a joke (i took it like that) and not a joke about alcoholism, just a silly thing because jesus christ they're not humans, they can't get actually drunk as humans and are not made to be able to become alcoholic
Moon was worried too, I KNOW, he's his brother of course he was worried of the idea of Sun drinking wine everyday
was it actually doing any damage to him? NO
they didn't showed us not even ONCE that Sun was tipsy, drunk or dependent on the wine, he just didn't wanna waste it, so i don't really get the alcoholism thing more than a hc that got way too out of hands
sunny never mentioned that he felt like wanting to d1e again, nor acted like it, he just wanted some time away from the whole madness happening, and again, wanting to stay home and chill is not depression, a totally different thing is being at home and not feeling able to get up, or go outside, or do anynthing at all
he could still be depressed? maybe
he is in a deep state of depression as before? NO
Sun was in that state before because everything happened too quickly and it was too much to handle, he was depressed
but then he learned to accept this new moments as best as he could, and he got closer to new moon, and he wished to help, and he got closer to earth, and he spended time with lunar
sun. got. his family. back
not as he planned to, but still.
he has new moon who takes care of him, who worries about him, who makes sure he's doing fine, he has a sister now, he loves his sister, he's better with lunar, so much better and they both worry about him
he's hanging out with people, he's going to other places, he's playing with his friends
i know, i know depression can be hidden behind a façade, i know people can seem happy and still not be actually happy
but honestly? i saw sun getting better
did i said before that they still needed to talk about his problems more? of course i did, and that happened, and i think it will still happen, little by little
yes, sun needs to let out a lot of things, he dooooes
that doesn't mean he still wants to d1e, that doesn't mean that the alcohol thing was a sign of alcoholism/depression, it was clearified by HIMSELF so many times, so I don't quite get why some people are mad that Sun isn't that way
please, sometimes i think people want sun to d1e just because.
and i don't know what's the thought process behind that, i want my boy getting better, not being back to a miserable state and even worse, d34th
,,, but anyway this is an internet shoooow
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baura-bear · 5 months
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it's like you're living a fanfic but it's neither fun nor romantic RIP. best of luck with the roommate situation i can tell you from experience that it sucks to have a friend fall in love with you especially when you don't reciprocate
thank you for the kinds words i'm actually attaching a story time because i can but also honestly no one feel obligated to read it because it's just me being anxious and complaining 💀💀 also this is the 4th friend of mine to admit feelings for me that i don't reciprocate and genuinely i'm starting to think either my autism has something to do with this or i'm on the aro/ace spectrum because huh (i hate being a complex ever-changing human being it's so difficult)
around the same time that I started college I started reading And They Were Roommates by WaitingForMy on Ao3 which is a college Javey au (very good fic do reccommend). Jack and Dave are roommates and end up being FWBs then start dating. so of course I would always make little in my head scenarios and I was like wow it would be crazy if that happened to me. Fast forward to this fall my roommate has a gf but im like 99% sure my roommate has a crush on me because any time they're under the influence they stare at me with this really sad look. Eventually they break up with their gf and I ask like "hey you don't like me do you?" and they say no that they've never liked me like that and we're just friends. so obviously I believe them!!! ok now fast forward to this spring we're FWBs everything's platonic we've talked about it whatever. Then this weekened: THEY START FLIRTING WITH ME this is normal we playfully banter but usually they're the one to initiate because they've had relationships and flings with way more people so it just comes naturally to them so naturally i follow their lead flirt back (again we do this as friends all the time and we had established that there were no feelings) they're like playing dress up and talking about how good they look in heels and how much taller they are than me and i'm like haha yeah! :3 and out of no where they stop and like gently push me away from them and are like "I'm sorry I have to be honest I have a crush on you and I don't think we should hook up anymore"
I don't mind that at all and I am so so glad they were honest with me but in the moment I was kind of freaking out because they had been initiating everything all day and it was just a really weird and sudden switch and it kind of spooked me also they were drunk and I was tipsy. at the time I was really freaking because of how random it was but i'm feeling better now. It's just confusing for me because me having autism it can be hard for me to tell peoples intentions and at the time I was feeling kind of betrayed that like I had trusted them to tell me the truth and now i'm like "what if they've been lying and they have liked me the whole time and I'm the one that's been leading them on and being an asshole and i didn't even realize" at the center of all of this i am just so terrified of hurting them
anyway no idea why i felt compelled to share all of this but it did make me feel better so if anyone made it this far thanks for humoring me
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buckys-black-dress · 3 years
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✄ chapter two: keep it cool like iced tea
a/n: here's chapter two! obvi this is just building the plot and storyline, but we're seeing the beginnings of the magic! anyways, let me shut up so u can read. ok bye!
wc: 2k
[fratboy!bucky barnes x fem!reader]
series masterlist
-
To say you sucked at pong was a vast understatement.
And although you really didn't want to make a fool of yourself in front of this very nice, very tall, very attractive guy, you can't help but feel like an idiot when you sink your first shot into a cup halfway through the game.
You're definitely on your way drunk with the amount of shots Natasha and Sam have scored on you, plus all the ones you've missed.
When Natasha told you to let loose tonight, you're not so sure this is what she meant, though. You see her laughing and giving you eyes from across the table, while your face is bright red. You brush off her looks with a roll of your eyes, darting them back to Bucky.
Bucky.
Bucky with the incredibly nice hands and arms, who seems to be making the shots for the both of you. Bucky who's been occasionally slinging an arm over your shoulders, paying close attention to you. Bucky who's been asking you questions about yourself, that you've returned back, and received witty responses to.
"So, where 're ya from, Y/N?" He asks in a slurred voice, but you can tell he's not exactly drunk yet.
"I'm from New York. You?" You ask, throwing back another drink from a shot that Nat made into your cup.
"No shit! I'm from Brooklyn!" He smiles, a big, bright smile that tugs at your heartstrings for some reason.
"I'm Manhattan born and raised, mister." You return his blinding smile.
"Small world, huh?" He laughs, once again wrapping his arm around you. "Can't believe we've never ran into each other before."
"Well, New York City's quite large, Bucky." You giggle, and he laughs back. As you feel your face warm up, he looks down at you with something akin to adoration in his eyes. Bucky towers over you, deciding that the pong game was over between the four of you.
He walks back to the kitchen, assuming that you'd follow him.
But he turns around to ask you in you'd like something to drink, and you're not there.
You're still chatting with Natasha and Sam, and it takes him a second to realized you wouldn't just follow after him. You didn't really give him the impression of being that type of girl.
Which is what intrigued him more about you. You weren't worshipping the ground he walked on, you didn't initiate conversation too much, and you didn't drool over him like every other girl he's met.
He suddenly feels a surge of awkwardness. He sees you talking animatedly with Sam and Natasha, and now Steve has joined in the conversation. You were talking completely comfortably with them, much more comfortably than you were with him.
It makes him wonder what he'll have to do to get you to get like that with him.
What he'll have to do to make you trust him.
"Hey, Y/N, I was gonna head to the kitchen and grab a drink. Wanna join?" He questions, seeing his friends giving him cocked eyebrows in confusion.
Bucky could usually get any girl he wanted. Especially at a party like this one. Why was he so hell-bent on spending time with you?
"O-Oh! Sure, I'll join you." You excuse yourself from the group, and Bucky slings his arm through your waist to guide you through the crowd. You feel you stomach flip in a way you've never felt before, and feel your cheeks redden.
"So, what can I get you?" Bucky practically yells over the music, trying to meet your eyes. You avert them quickly, and simply tell him a vodka lemonade.
He hands it to you with a strange look in his eyes, and you give him a kind smile while taking your first sip.
"God, you trying to get me wasted here?" You gag with a laugh, looking into your cup and back to Bucky.
"Sorry, doll, might'a gone a bit heavy on the vodka. You still good to drink it?" He queries with genuine concern in his eyes.
And although you already well on your way to drunk, past tipsy, you give fervent nod, and give it another sip.
It was good.
-
As the night had progressed further, you had two more of Bucky's vodka lemonades.
And now, you were drunk.
You also didn't know where Natasha was, but she was probably off somewhere with Sam, so you weren't worried for her safety.
Bucky was still by your side throughout the whole night, offering to dance, and even just sit and talk.
Which is what you were doing right now. In the middle of the crowd, you were practically on top of Bucky while you two talked about anything from academics to your daily lives.
"So, in your major, what would you say was the dumbest thing someone's asked?" He laughs, and he's clearly also past the line of tipsy and has fallen into drunk, right with you.
"Uhhh... oh! One time, this guy-"
"Doll, I can't really hear ya." Bucky laughs
"Oh, sorry," You blush, trying to speak louder, but it still wasn't working.
"Do you- would you be okay with just goin' up to my room? Don't think we'll get much of anythin' done down here." He gives you a look that says 'I'm not gonna hurt you, unless you want me to.'
It sends a shiver down your spine, and you stand up, waiting for him to guide you up the stairs.
You knew you weren't going to have sex with him. You had only met him four hours ago, and no matter how many girls he could pull in that time, you were not interested in being one of them.
"Just so you know now, I'm not planning on sleeping with you." You burst out while you're halfway up the stairs, your eyes going wide at your own words.
"Huh," Bucky chuckles, "I know I have a reputation that precedes me, but I didn't think this is where that was going. Just wanted to continue to conversation." He smiles down at you, finally opening his door.
Of course, Bucky was lying right through his teeth. Of course he wanted to sleep with you. You were nice, smart, had a hell of a body, and had kept his attention the longest out of any girl he's ever met. But when it comes down to it, he was a boy.
And boys usually only thought with one organ; their dicks.
As the lamp flicks on, a small glow filters over the room, giving it a cozy feel. You, on the other hand, felt nothing but cozy.
"You can sit anywhere. Wanna watch somethin'?" He asks, tossing you the remote while you stood, frozen at the doorway.
"I- uh, sure?" You ask, more than you tell him, but sit down on his bed. You were careful to not flash him while you adjusted yourself, not sure of what to do.
The last thing you needed tonight was the most notorious playboy on campus seeing your black lace thong right now.
"Do you wanna change into somethin' more comfortable, angel?" Again, your stomach has butterflies trying to escape at his sweet words. But you knew better than to think too much into it. he probably said these names to every girl who's come into this very bed.
Ew, you think to yourself, this bed must have STDs sewn in the sheets by now.
"I- sure? If you have anything that fits, I guess." You grumble.
"Sure, I've got a t-shirt and boxers, if you want? Don't have much else, honestly." He laughs lightly, handing you the items and points to the bathroom in the corner of his room.
As you're standing in the middle of Bucky Barnes' jack and jill bathroom, you take a moment and think to yourself.
How did I get here?
Will he ask me to sleep here?
Does he still expect anything from me?
I hope not.
I'm really tired.
Ugh. Whatever. I'm too tired to think this much right now.
You pull of your dress that you couldn't stand to be in anymore, and put on the clothes Bucky had provided you with.
They were quite large on you, considering the guy was about the size of bigfoot. But you couldn't find it in yourself to complain about it right now.
You exit the bathroom, setting the dress down on the floor where you had kicked off your heels, and sit back down next to Bucky on his bed.
You feel your skin slide under the blanket that was thrown over him, and focus on the TV screen.
"So, what're we watching?" You query, trying to figure out what was playing.
Little did you know, Bucky was still thinking about the way you had looked when you walked out of the bathroom. It did something to him, seeing you in his clothes like that, for some reason.
The way you were practically swimming in them, and the way you knuckled at your eyes tiredly that made him want to hold you to his chest while you both fell asleep.
He was trying to shake the thoughts from his head, wondering what the hell had gotten into him with these thoughts.
Since when did he, Bucky Barnes, think about a girl like this? It was usually much dirtier and nastier in his head, but you were doing something to him.
"Bucky? Everything alright up there?" You giggle, knocking on his skull lightly.
"I- yeah, all good, doll." He shakes his thoughts away, focusing back on you. "I put on whatever was playing, didn't switch it because I didn't know what you liked." Bucky explains.
"Hm, well this seems good. We can just keep this on?" You suggest, realizing that Home Alone 2 was playing on his TV. "I love this movie. This kid's got some real class." You chuckle, now fully watching the movie.
"He's a genius, I'll give 'im that much." Bucky laughs, also fixing his gaze on the movie.
In the hour that passed, you two have made small talk about the movie here and there, and every time, Bucky's gaze became transfixed on you. With the glow of the TV illuminating your face, with the way you smiled and threw your head back when you laughed, he couldn't help it.
Finally, the movie had come to a close, and Bucky could tell you were fighting sleep. You were practically asleep sitting up against his headboard.
"You wanna spend the night here, doll?" He wonders out loud, looking over to you.
You shoot him a look, a playful glare with a hint of a smile.
"I mean, it's a bit late for me to head back to my dorm. But no funny business, mister." You point a finger at him, and Bucky holds his hands up in the air.
"No funny business, I promise." He holds out his pinky to you, to which you curl yours around, and latch on.
Once the lamp next to his side of the bed is turned off, you slide further down in his bed, trying to find a comfortable position. After a few minutes of adjusting, you snuggle your head into the pillows that smell like laundry detergent and his cologne.
"Goodnight, Bucky," you say out loud into the darkness while you both face each other.
"G'night doll. See ya in the morning." Bucky's voice is a low baritone, clearly about to succumb to the sleep he was fighting.
"See ya in the morning." You reply, finally letting your eyes fall shut.
That night, you dream of Bucky Barnes and his cologne.
And across from you, Bucky Barnes dreams of a world where this is normal. A world where you sleep next to him every night, and you wake him up every morning with a kiss.
Man, I'm totally fucked, is the last thought he has before falling into a sleep surrounded by you.
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autumnsart22 · 3 years
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Suna x reader: Final part (smut)
Here’s the final part to my Suna series! I wasn’t satisfied with my fluff version of the ending (which you can read here if you’re interested) so I decided to write a more smutty version. 
Warning: degradation, angry sex, light choking, mostly just a lot of degrading lol
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I genuinely think this is the hottest fanart I’ve ever seen of him I can barely look at it without ✨butterflies✨. 
Art creds go to @minghuaa_art on twitter!
Despite Kita seeing you that day in the car, Suna still asked to keep whatever was between you a secret. That was fine with you--you didn’t particularly want a boyfriend, especially with the second semester of college work picking up. You still got to see him pretty often, hooking up in his car or your dorm at least three nights a week or more. Never the frat house; apparently his roommates were annoying. 
It was nice. Easy. Far easier than you ever expected friends with benefits to be. And beyond the sex, you loved talking to Suna; laying together on your tiny bed, legs tangled, while he explained the new music he was listening to, or walking together to the cafeteria as he made you laugh so hard that water came out of your nose. 
The good parts were enough to overlook the bad parts. At first. 
Suna was an abnormally horrific texter, barely ever responding within the day, if at all. If you ever wanted to get in contact with him, you’d have to call directly. And honestly even then he didn’t have the best track record. 
What was more frustrating was that it was always on his time. He would text you asking to hang out that night, and you would say yes, and then he wouldn’t respond until the following afternoon with some vague excuse about being busy. The first few times it happened, you got so mad that you didn’t respond to his calls, until he showed up at your dorm with panda express and forced you to watch Tokyo Ghoul with him. 
He had apologized...but it didn’t stop happening. It made you feel like you were some sort of side whore, who he called when he was bored and had nothing better to do. Like you were second best to everything else he had going on in his life. 
You had promised yourself from the beginning that you wouldn’t allow yourself to get close enough to get hurt, but it was hard. You really, really liked him. 
You liked the way he would stare at you while you talked, actually listening and curious as to what you had to say. You liked the way he hugged you after a few days of not seeing each other, burying his face in your hair like he couldn’t get close enough to you. You liked the way he laughed, both the usual, quiet chuckles and the rare snorting wheezes. You liked the way his mouth looked when he smoked, the way he moaned your name when he came, the way he could make you laugh at anything at any time. 
You didn’t want to get the “I told you so” talk from Kiyoko, so you avoided the topic all together: with her, and yourself. 
After one month of hanging out with Suna, you were planning on meeting up and going to see a movie. Both of you were more homebodies, preferring to stay in rather than party, but you had decided that you wanted to try and expand your horizons once again. The movies seemed like a happy compromise. 
The film was something Suna had been talking about for a while, an action thriller that honestly looked like shit but got good audience reviews because of all the flashy fight scenes. He had been so excited when it came out that you hadn’t been able to say no to going, especially not after he pried you with food. 
He was coming to get you at 6 pm, and your last class ended at 3pm, which gave you plenty of time to get ready. You stared at the face of your teacher on the screen within your zoom class, zoning out as he explained the flood system around the school. You glanced over as your phone buzzed, a message from Suna popping up on the screen. 
Suna
Wha u doying rit now?
You
What?
Suna
Sorr little drynk 
You
You’re drunk? 
Suna
im at psrty
You
Are we still seeing a movie tonight?
There was no response, and you felt your stomach drop. You didn’t even notice as your teacher ended class and logged you off the meeting. Suna was at a party at 3 in the afternoon, drunk, and didn’t seem to remember you had plans. You swallowed, shoving your phone aside as you ground your teeth. Why was he so frustrating? 
You stood up, angry at yourself for caring, furious at Suna for making you feel this way, for being such a piece of shit. You knew what party he was probably at--Kiyoko had said she was going at some point--and suddenly you were moving before you could think about it. 
You dressed nice, but casual enough that it wasn’t out of place at a frat party. Sexy enough to make him want you though, of course. 
You didn’t give yourself time for nerves as you strode from your dorm and headed in the direction of the frat house, following a steady stream of people already going in that direction. You knew it was Friday, but how the fuck were so many people already getting ready to party when it was literally 3:30????
It wasn’t overly crowded in the house when you entered, but enough where it was confusing as you wandered through the crowd. You snatched two drinks from the counter, downing them as fast as possible as you searched for Suna in the crowd. You’d need to be at least tipsy before having this confrontation. 
You found him in the living room, sprawled out on the couch next to who you recognized to be Akaashi, Kuroo, Kita, and Iwaizumi--all who you knew through Kiyoko. There were a few others you didn’t know, and they were all clearly drunk out of their minds. 
As you entered the room, Suna met your eyes for a brief moment, but then they moved on without a reaction. He didn’t care at all that you had come to find him, or that he had never responded to your text. 
The drink in your hand trembled, and you walked out of the room without looking back. 
Instead of talking to Suna, you decided to get wasted. An hour after first coming to the party, you were deep in a game of beer pong and you had a pleasant warmth in your gut, the world a little hazy. You felt braver, more angry, and suddenly all you wanted to do was track down that yellow eyed idiot and slap him. 
“Where’s Suna?” You slurred, turning to look at your partner at beer pong. You knew him vaguely as one of the frat boys, Suna’s friend Atsumu. 
Atsumu grinned, raising his eyebrows as he stared down at you. “Suna? Why?” 
You weren’t drunk enough to tell him of your “friendship” with Suna, so you just shrugged. 
“He’s over there,” Atsumu pointed towards the kitchen, and you felt all the blood drain from your face as you followed his gaze. Sitting in a chair, his back to you, was Suna...and on his lap was a beautiful blonde girl with her hands in his hair as she kissed him fiercely. 
You must have made some sort of sound, because Atsuma looked back at you. “You good?” 
You forced yourself to nod. “I’m...going to go get some fresh air.” 
“I’ll come,” he said, and you decided not to argue. 
Seeing Suna had sobered you up considerably, but your emotions were still a complete mess. All you could feel was a deep, unending hurt. 
As you headed down the hall, Atsumu grabbed your wrist and spun you around to face him. “So...you and Suna huh?” He said, a strange smile on his face. 
“What are you--?” 
“It’s fine, you don’t have to keep it a secret.” He took a step towards you, and you raised your eyebrows. 
“We aren’t together.” 
“Really? Then you wouldn’t mind,” He gently took your chin, lifting your face. “If I did this?” 
“I--” 
“What the fuck.” 
All the breath wooshed out of you at the familiar voice, which was now laced with anger. Suna stood a few feet away, his hands in his pockets as he watched you and Atsumu. He was smiling, but it was icy with rage and...jealousy?
“Suna,” Atsumu grinned, releasing your face but not stepping back. “What do you want?” 
Suna jerked his chin in your direction. “How about you get away from her, and then we’ll talk?”
“Dude,” Atsumu rolled his eyes. “She just told me she was single. I don’t get what the problem is.” 
Suna’s face tightened. “If you don’t get the fuck out of here in the next three seconds, I swear I will break your--”
“Chill, ok!” Atsumu stepped back from you, given you a frustrated look before heading away down the hall. 
When he was out of sight, Suna’s head slowly turned to face you, his eyes dark. “Single?” His voice was a low snarl. 
You swallowed, feeling your anger return full force. How dare he. “Yes!” You snapped, “Since you clearly don’t view this as any sort of relationship.” 
“What are you talking about?” 
“So you can go off kissing other girls, but I can’t flirt with Atsumu?” 
“Looked like a bit more than flirting,” he said, teeth bared, before the other part of what you said caught up to him. “And how drunk are you? I wasn’t kissing shit!” 
“Are you seriously lying to my face right now? I saw you!” 
“I didn’t kiss anyone! Do you really think that little of me?”
You clenched your fists. “Atsumu said--” 
Suna was in your face in a second, towering over you as he backed you against the wall. “What did he say?” He growled. 
You clenched your jaw, glaring at him in silence. 
Suna gave a dark chuckle. “So that’s how it’s going to be, huh?” 
You barely had time to react before he gripped your chin, kissing you roughly and shoving his tongue in your mouth. You moaned, and the sound snapped whatever restraints Suna had. His hands ran down the back of your thighs, lifting you up so you could wrap your legs around his waist as he carried you through the nearest door into a random bedroom. He kissed down your neck as he kicked the door shut, and you gasped as he tossed you on the bed. 
Your eyes slid down his chest and across his toned stomach as he pulled his shirt over his head, completely at a loss for what to do. You could feel the heat pulsing between your legs, making your heart race and your body tremble. But this was wrong. Right? 
You didn’t have anymore time to think about it as Suna gripped your ankles, dragging you to the end of the bed. 
“Why do you still have clothes on?” He snarled, yanking your leggings off and leaving them in a tangled mess on the floor. His eyes darkened as they swept over the pair of lacy underwear you had worn, sliding towards your center where you kept your thighs clenched tightly together. 
He didn’t say a word as he forced your legs apart, dropping to his knees at the end of the bed, yanking down your underwear, and positioning one of your legs over his shoulder. You shuddered as his hot breath caressed you, and he ran lazy circles along the inside of your thighs with his long fingers. 
“Fuck…” He murmured under his breath before looking up at you. “Do you want me to--”
“Stop teasing me Suna,” you groaned, shifting your hips, and he laughed darkly. 
“Fine.”
You practically screamed at the first sweep of his tongue, managing to turn your face into a pillow to muffle your noises as he worked around your clit and used his fingers in your core. You bucked your hips up into his face, and his laughter vibrating through your body almost had you coming within the first minute. 
You let out a low cry of protest as he pulled away, raising his head to glare at you. His mouth was covered in your juices, his hair rumpled and eyes glassy. He leaned over you, yanking away the pillow you had been using to cover your mouth and throwing it across the room. 
“What are you--”
“I want to hear you begging for it,” he snapped, and you managed to roll your eyes before he shoved his fingers back into you. 
“You’re so--ah!” You shuddered. 
Over the course of a month of fucking each other, Suna had figured out exactly how to make you fall apart under his tongue and fingers, so it didn’t take long for him to work you into an early climax. Your legs shook, and you let out a series of moans as you came all over his mouth. 
He got to his feet after making sure he had licked you completely clean, gazing down at you with possessive smugness. 
“Why do you look so fucked out already? We’ve barely gotten started.” 
You didn’t even argue as you got onto your knees on the bed, hands sliding into his hair as you kissed him angrily, unsaid words erupting. He allowed you to shove him onto the bed, and you focused on unzipping his pants and throwing them aside, ditching your shirt and bra along with it. His boxers went next, and then you had his dick in your hands, stroking it while Suna groaned. 
“Here,” he panted, tossing you a condom, and you slid it over his cock just like he taught you. You positioned yourself over him, impatient, your knees on either side of his hips as you thrust yourself down on him in one go. You both moaned at the feeling of finally having him inside you. 
“F-fuck,” you gasped, slowly rolling your hips as you rested your hands lightly on Suna’s chest. You went slow, taking the time to feel how deep he reached inside you, the movement on your clit enough to send tingles up the rest of your body. 
Suna watched you ride him lazily, his yellow eyes half closed as he took in the way your naked body shifted to move on top of him. 
“Ha, you’re doing so good...god--you’re so fucking sexy,” he groaned, and you glared down at him. 
“You make me so...mad…” You managed between pants of pleasure, and Suna raised his eyebrows. 
“You can still talk? I guess I’m not doing enough…” 
Before you could protest, he flipped you over so that you were lying on your back with him hovering over you, his dark hair falling around his face as he gripped your throat lightly. 
“You’re such a little cumslut aren’t you?” He murmured in your ear, and you arched slightly. “Don’t you ever try and fuck someone else again, got it? You’re only allowed to come around my cock.”
You moaned in agreement, and Suna rolled you over onto your stomach, dragging your hips up so your ass was high in the air. He gave you no warning as he thrust back in, practically fucking you into the mattress. 
Your eyes rolled back in your head as he used his fingers to reach around and rub your clit, his other hand running along your breast. You could  barely think through the pleasure, and the only coherent word you were managing to say was his name.
Suna leaned over you, yanking your head back to murmur in your ear. “You’re mine, got it?” His words were rough, and you clenched hard around his cock. You could feel your second orgasm approaching, and he could tell too by the way you shuddered around him. He paused in his motion, and you wiggled your hips in protest, trying to get him going again. 
“Why’d you stop?” You snapped, glancing over your shoulder when he didn’t continue. 
Suna grinned. “Beg for it, bitch.”
He moved slightly, letting you feel the friction, and you gasped in anger and pleasure. This bastard wanted to tease you, make you submit to him…
Despite knowing this, you broke almost immediately. “Please, Suna, please please, I need you so bad--”
Immediately, he picked up his pace once again, adding more pressure to your clit, and you jerked. “That’s a good girl.” 
“Ah, ah, Suna, fuck, I love-- you, ahhh…” You cried, feeling moisture spill down your thighs as your stomach erupted for the second time that night. 
For a moment he stilled, and you bit your lip in tired confusion. Did he want you to beg again? You weren’t sure you had another round in you. 
You looked over to see him with a shocked expression on his face, but it quickly melted into smugness again once he caught you staring at him. “Of course you love me while I’m fucking you like this,” he growled finally. “It’s because you’re such a slut for it, right?” 
Your mouth dropped open, but you didn’t have time to say anything as he started moving once again, making you yelp at the overstimulation. Had you said you loved him? Out loud? Oh my god…
“Have I fucked you stupid already?” he purred in your ear, pulling out of your dripping cunt before slamming back in and picking up his pace. You moaned loudly, thrusting your hips back to meet his as all thoughts flew from your head. 
“S-Suna I--” You could barely speak, it felt so good, despite the fact that you had already come. Twice. 
 He began to pant in your ear, groaning as his grip on your hips tightened.“F-fuck--” He grunted, arms sliding around your waist as he jerked and came. 
You both collapsed on the bed, sweaty and exhausted, and Suna easily pulled the condom from his dick before tying it and tossing it in the trash. After a long moment, you rolled to your feet to padded over to where your clothes lay--until you realized that your leggings had a massive rip in them. 
“Suna!” You cried, holding up the fabric. He raised his eyebrows, and had the decency to at least look vaguely guilty. 
“Sorry.” 
“What do I wear?!” 
“Here.” He threw the shirt he had been wearing earlier at you, and you gave him a glare.
He had already wiped himself down with the tissues on the counter, and had pulled on his sweatpants once again, leaving him shirtless. His eyes swept lazily down your still naked body, his tongue coming out to wet his lips, and you crossed your arms in annoyance. 
“Suna,” You snapped, but finally pulled his shirt over your head, not seeing another option. “I’m going to go get cleaned up,” you said, before heading out the door without waiting for a response. 
The bathroom was thankfully right down the hall, and thankfully empty. You didn’t feel very guilty about fucking Suna when you should have been communicating in a healthy way, but you definitely still felt mad. 
After you had wiped all the fluids from your inner thighs and core, you headed back to the room to grab the rest of your stuff. 
You found Suna on his phone lying on the bed, but he looked up as you came in. 
“Where are you going?” He said as you gathered your stuff, and you huffed. 
“Back to my dorm.” 
“Wait,” he lunged out of the bed and grabbed your arm. “Don’t go.” 
“Now you want to spend time with me?” 
“Just...stay. Please.” 
You swallowed, taking a deep breath. “Fine.” 
His expression relaxed into a happy smile, and he dragged you onto the bed with him before flicking out the lights. You weren’t sure what time it was exactly, but you were sure it was far past two in the morning. Your eyelids drooped as Suna wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you back against his chest. 
You were right on the edge of sleep when he murmured, “Did you mean it?” 
Immediately you were awake; you knew exactly what he meant. “U-um--” You hadn’t worked out any of the problems between you two, and you were sure he didn’t feel the same way. How were you supposed to admit to loving him like this?
“It’s fine,” he finally muttered. “We can talk about it tomorrow.” 
You swallowed. “Yes. I did mean it.” Your voice was barely above a whisper, but you felt Suna tense around you. 
“Really?”
You closed your eyes, forcing yourself to say it. “Yes... I love you.” 
You felt his sigh against your air, ticking the little hair on the back of your neck. His hand slid across your stomach while the other gently began to stroke your hair, and the movement had you relaxing despite the tears that had built up at his lack of response. 
You closed your eyes and set it aside; you would deal with it tomorrow. Now, it was time for sleep. 
“I love you too.” You heard, so soft that it was almost just a breath of air.  
It was probably just a dream.  
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writing-in-april · 3 years
Text
A hair’s breadth
Javier Peña x Female Reader
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Summary: Javier and Reader can’t help but be at each others throats. Javier gets fed up with the teasing one night.
A/N: Hey everyone! Here’s my nineteenth fic for my 30 fics in 30 days!!! Sorry this is out late- I had a job interview!! (I got the job! 🥳) This is based off of this and this request! There’s not as much Spanish in this one- though one day soon I want to try to write all the dialogue for Javier in Spanish- (I am trying to learn how to be better at it im just very nervous I’ll get it all wrong 🙃) Please feel free to drop me a message in my inbox here (I promise I don’t bite) Thank you for reading and hope y’all enjoy!
Warnings: 18+, Smut, Protected Sex (wrap it up especially with Javier lol), Fingering, Hate fucking, Public sex (who’s surprised), Hair pulling, Choking, Mirror sex
Main Masterlist Word Count: 1.9k
“Do that again I dare you.” Javier had you pushed up against the wall of his apartment, with his hand around your throat. How you had gotten in this position was as a result of one of your regular fights you often had with him.
This time it had been over something even more petty than the last time. You honestly couldn’t remember exactly what had started it. It had been something to do with some obscure line in the paperwork you were filling out while over at his apartment late at night past embassy hours. What had been a small issue then turned into a full blown argument, snapping and yelling at each other until it reached its peak.
Javier knew that he shouldn’t have said that just by the look on his face while he had a hand around your throat. You had slapped him after a misogynistic comment, which then had him slamming you up against the wall.
“Fuck you!” You yelled, but did not move to get out of his grip. He was about to respond with probably another biting comment when you were both interrupted.
You both looked over to his front door when there was incessant knocking, which was probably only from one person. “Hey Javi! Do you or Y/N want to go out for a drink tonight?” Steve’s voice being shouted through the walls confirmed the source of the knocks. You were glad his door was closed, otherwise this would've been an awkward situation to explain to your coworker.
Javier looked back at you one last time with a hard look on his face; it was a normal occurrence for you to receive that type of look from him. You smiled despite his hand around your throat as you had gotten what you had wanted, you had succeeded in riling him up.
Steve knocked again, this time a little harsher. He didn’t look away this time, eyes narrowing in on you further, like he was trying to decide if he should release you from his clutches. Though, it wasn’t that you were completely helpless, you could force him off of you if you wanted. But, you wanted to see what he would do.
“Are you going to answer him?” You goaded, biting your lip when you finished speaking, eagerly waiting for his response. No verbal comment came from him, instead he released the hold he had on your neck. You slumped a little, not out of pain as his hold hadn’t been that tight, you had just been surprised when he released you so quickly.
“Lo siento…” Was mumbled under Javier’s breath. You wondered if he meant for you to hear it or if he said it only to ease his conscience.
Javier walked over to the door to swing it open with you in tow, luckily already recovered somewhat from his hand around your throat. Steve jumped slightly when Javier opened it forcefully, then smiling when you both responded to his question, albeit gruffly, “Yeah, sure.”
—-
Javier clenched his fist hard while you took a drink, smirking into the glass was the only indication that you knew exactly what you were doing. You had spruced yourself up a bit to go to the bar, slipping on a dress you had just bought recently and putting on a pair of high heels. As soon as you had appeared back downstairs where Steve and Javier had been waiting for you his jaw had clenched hard, just like his fist was doing right now.
You were sat at the edge of the booth you had all congregated in, Javier was right across from me and Steve was by the window absentmindedly drinking a beer. He didn’t notice how you were sat slightly to the side, inching the dress you wore higher just to see Javier’s fist clench more.
“I’m surprised you guys were actually working together without me there.” Steve scratched at his jaw. We both pretended to partially focus back on him for a moment, Javier’s fist dropped much to my disappointment.
You glanced over at him then giving him one of the biggest lies you’ve ever told, “We’ve found a way to- resolve our differences.”
Javier took an angry gulp of whiskey, somehow it was possible that he was now even more pissed off at you then before. He opened his mouth to probably say something backhanded as usual, but Steve steamrolled him unintentionally, “Well- I’m glad, the office is kinda painful to be in when y’all are having one of your arguments.”
“Well hopefully we won’t bother you anymore.” Javier finally got a word in and it was just as snippy as expected.
You then downed the rest of your drink in one gulp, a little tipsy now from the few drinks you’d had so far. A dull thud from you setting the glass down on the table was swallowed by the noises of the other customers and employees around you. You got up, fed up with getting only little responses from him, “I’m going to the bathroom.”
—-
“Javier what are you doing?” You asked incredulously when he entered the women’s restroom, but weren’t given an answer. You didn’t pull away when he pulled you close, dipping his head to suck a hickey on the underside of your jaw. You only keened into his touch, you may have hated him, but it did feel amazing. Your teasing had worked
“I told Steve I was going to the bathroom too.” Giving a quick summary before continuing his assault on your skin, “You drive me absolutely crazy.” He spitefully said into your skin in between sucking and biting your collarbone. You didn’t care enough to respond, he knew you felt the same. In a flash he pulled your dress off of your head, exposing all of you except what was covered by your bra and underwear.
When he then gripped his fingers around the fabric of your panties and ripped them off, you gasped in anger. He then ran his fingers through your folds, stopping at your clit to run small circles into it. You were still angry about the ruined panties on the floor, and the fact that with just a few touches he was proving why everyone fell at his feet after they slept with them. “I liked those!”
“You seem to like this too.” His fingers sped up their movements, alternating between hard and light pressure. Your orgasm was building embarrassingly quickly, you almost wanted to hold it back so Javier didn’t get a big head. It felt too good though, and you didn’t have a lot of time.
You were both a hair’s breadth away from getting caught, Javier’s fingers continued their movements with no thought. Steve was drunk, he might even be asleep right now. But, one wrong move and he’d hear Javier fucking you in the bathroom.
“Javier!” You shouted, not thinking about the volume, when he pulled his fingers away from you just as you were about to fall off the edge. He then brought his wet fingers to his lips, sucking off any evidence of your arousal. It was hard to be mad when he looked so hot doing that, even though your clit was throbbing now.
“Need to fuck you now- this’ll take too long if we wait for you.” You wanted to snap at him again, his comment flippant and somewhat rude. That was until he pulled his cock out of his pants, already hard just for you. Your mind switched gears after that.
“Condom?” He grunted in response to your question, then pulled one out of his wallet. You were about to ask how long it had been in there, but with the rate he fucks, you doubted it had been there for long.
Once he slipped it on he commanded, ���Bend over.” You scoffed, about to retort that you’d never bend over for him. But, Javier beat you to the punch, “I won’t ask again, I’ll leave you here naked and dripping.” You shuddered at that, your arousal was too much to ignore. So, you let him have one victory, hopping off the counter to bend over.
You caught sight of your disheveled state in the mirror, your legs buckling a little because of it. You already looked completely ruined by him, and he hadn’t done much besides fingering you. Javier must have caught you staring at yourself, and him if you were being honest, wrapping his hand around your hair to push you closer to the mirror. “¿Que? You like watching yourself? You like getting fucked while Steve and everybody else could hear you?”
You tried to nod your head, but with his firm grip on your hair while he began to sink into you, all you could do was moan. Once you realized that you were most definitely being too loud you stopped yourself making any noise by biting your lip hard. When the front of Javier’s thighs hit the back of yours he leaned forward to whisper angrily in your ear, “Yeah- you do like this.”
His pace was rough, but not sloppy, quick thrusts that had your ass rippling from the force. This was going to be a quick and dirty fuck, Steve would soon come looking for us if we didn’t get our orgasms over and done with. Besides, all you were looking for was a release, being with Javier for more time than was necessary just sounded like a punishment. Despite the pace he was keeping up, he still managed to keep your head right where he wanted it, looking directly in the mirror.
Your orgasm was building up again, even faster than before since you were already sensitive. At one point when your eyes began to roll back as you got closer Javier snapped that you should keep your eyes open.
“Come on, cum.” He growled out once he noticed how close you were, “Cum while Steve is out there- wondering where we went.”
Your eyes rolled into the back of your head at that, your orgasm crashing over you. Javier reached his own peak while you were riding out your own, filling the condom, gripping your hair and hip hard as he did.
Once your highs had abated he pulled out of you with a groan, quickly tying off the condom while you were still bent over and recovering with gasped breaths.
“Hey Javier?” You asked right as he began to turn around to go, letting you put your clothes back on and clean up in peace.
“¿Sì?” He turned around to face you again, looking much more put back together than you were with your makeup still smudged. You had the remnants of the panties he had ripped off of you dangling on your finger.
You wrapped your other hand around his belt he put back on, pulling him back closer to you so you were both chest to chest. You then stuffed the scrap of torn fabric into the front pocket of his jeans until they were completely hidden.
“Now you get to sit right next to Steve while they’re in your pocket.” He gulped a little and you gave one last remark before turning back to clean up your makeup, “And, you’ve got to pay for a new pair, I liked those.”
Though he boiled your blood as you walked back to the table where he had joined Steve back at you realized you were only a hairs breadth away from not hating him.
Ask Me Anything
—-
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All Works: @shotarosleftpinky @90spumkin @kyra-morningstar @spenxerslut @boxofsparklingmuses @katexrichardson @takeyourleap-of-faith
Javier Peña/Narcos: @pascalesque
196 notes · View notes
reidgraygubler · 4 years
Text
kiwi(matthew gray gubler/fem!reader)
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Title: kiwi
@driving-wild​ requested: Can I have a MGG one shot pls? y/n works on CM and has known MGG for a long time. They had a one night stand that they haven’t spoken about and y/n is pregnant. One of the other actors brings it up in front of whole cast including MGG? Idk if that makes sense aha thank you
Couple: matthew gray gubler/make up artist!fem!reader
Category: semi-spicy fluff, some angst 
Content Warning: swearing, allusions to sex, heavy making out, mentions of failed contraceptive (broken condom), verbal arguments (includes shouting), talks about sex, mentions of abortion, talks of co-parenting, light drinking, mega d-bag matthew at some points,
Word Count: 4775
Summary:  Reader and Matthew have a night in together. After their escapade together, Matthew ignores reader… Until she tells him some life changing news.
a/n: i kinda misread the “they haven’t spoken about it” and took it as “matthew ignores the reader”... but i think that works… low-key based off kiwi by harry styles (but not really…). This one-shot was originally going to contain smut, but i low-key was struggling with it, so I nixed the smut. im sure i’ll post smut again soon. idk why i struggled with smut this time… anyways, thanks for the love! check out my masterlist!
{***}{***}{***}
AJ>Me & 7 others: Girls night! Mulligans at 8! 
So, that’s where I am… After a long day at work, I go out with all the people I spent 12+ hours with. I lifted my glass to my lips to take a long sip. My friends were talking about something that I didn’t care about. Honestly, I never really cared about anything they talked about. It was all mostly the same old gossip from the day or from their lives. I was used to hearing it, I was a makeup artist after all.
I glanced at everyone at the table before looking around the place. A familiar person was sitting at the bar, a small glass of bourbon in hand. He was hunched over the counter as he looked at his drink. 
“Matthew?” I whispered, squinting at the man at the bar. AJ said something before loudly excusing herself from the table. I, again, didn’t really hear what she said, I was too busy looking across the bar.
I’ve been working on set for several years, nearly 8, as one of the few makeup artists. I was ever so blessed to be placed with Matthew and Kirsten (as well as Shemar before he left). I suppose ever since I started, Matthew and I became best friends. I wouldn’t be lying if I said I had the smallest crush on him. Have you seen the man?!
“I’ll be right back!” I shouted as I looked at Kirsten. She looked at me and gave me a thumbs-up before going back to her previous conversation. 
I didn’t bother grabbing my drink before I stood up. I was all done drinking it anyway. And with that, I quietly and quickly made my way to the bar. 
“Hey,” I spoke standing beside him. “What are you doing here, Matthew?” I languidly leaned against the counter beside him. I held my drink close to me as I looked at him. He looked up from the counter and smiled back at me. “It’s weird not seeing you in a makeup chair or on set,” I chuckled lightly as I leaned closer to him. It honestly wasn’t that weird seeing him off set. I mean, we’ve hung out together outside of work. He is one of my long time friends, who I would trust with my life. But a lot of people on set would trust Matthew with their lives. 
“Oh, c’mon, it’s not that weird,” he looked at me with a cheeky grin. I returned his grin with a somewhat flirty smile. Well, as flirty as I could let it be. The level of intoxication I was feeling was borderline drunk, teetering on tipsy and buzzed. “Same reason you’re out,” he looked down at his drink before taking a sip.
“You’re out for girls’ night?” I asked, my volume getting louder as I spoke. My body was suddenly gravitating closer to his, my hand grasping his upper arm to steady myself. “Because that’d just be crazy if you were!” I shouted as I leaned closer to his face. Matthew turned his head to look at me better. 
“No, no, just came out with some friends,” his smile became genuine as he looked at me. I pulled my hand off his arm and steadied myself against the bar beside me. “And, my brother too. He fucked off to the bathroom though,” he waved behind us towards the vague area of the bathrooms.
“Ah, very nice! ‘Ave you seen AJ?!” I stumbled slightly closer to him so there were just a few inches between us. I leaned forward and pressed my body against his. “She came with me but I can’t find her,” I looked up at his face. Matthew raised an eyebrow before helping me stand straighter. 
“Yeah, yeah I think I saw her a little bit ago,” his grip on my arm got a little tighter as he steadied me. “But, I’m not sure where she went to from there,” he looked around at the people around us. “Bathroom, I think,” he added. I nodded, even though I already knew that.
“Eh, whatever, who needs her,” I smiled as I rested my hand on his arm, “Can you take me outside, it’s hot in here,” I looked up at his face and felt my face warm up. It could be one of three things. 1) The alcohol in my system was starting to make me hot. 2) The temperature of the bar was actually starting to rise due to the many people crowding inside. Or, 3) Matthew Gray Gubler was actually starting to get me hot and bothered. And I wouldn’t be surprised if it was a mix of the three, the latter being the main cause.
“Of course, you’re looking a little flush,” he nodded, wrapping an arm around my body. I looked up at him as he guided me towards the front door of the bar. “Did you bring your purse in with you or anything?” he asked, looking down at me then around the bar to find where I had come from.
“Nah, it’s in the car,” I waved him and my purse off. Matthew nodded before finally taking me outside. The hot air from the bar and the cool air of the outside hit me all at once and confused my body. 
“Fuck it was hot in there,” I wiped my face with the back of my hand as I stood up straight.  Matthew glanced down at me as he brought me over towards the seating area the bar had. The partying was inside, as opposed to the chilly outside. 
“Should I call a cab?” Matthew asked, looking down at me once I was sitting down. I rested my elbow on the table before resting my chin in my hand. 
“Yeah, that’d be great, I can always come back for my car tomorrow,” I looked to the parking lot and towards my car. Matthew nodded as he pulled his phone from his pocket and stepped away from me as he was on a call.
I cocked my head to my shoulder and watched as he walked away from me. A smile suddenly grew on my lips as my eyes wandered up and down his backside. Of course, the thought of sleeping with my co-worker has passed my mind before. I’m sure a lot of people have had that thought. 
“20 minutes,” he pointed at me with his phone before he pocketed it. I blinked away the somewhat filthy thoughts I was having before looking up at him. “Do you want me to go home with you?” 
“I’m not drunk, you know,” I watched as he sat across from me, “And, I know how to hold my booze,” I reached across the table to grasp his hand. Matthew looked at me and smiled. 
“I know this,” he laughed lightly as he turned his hand so he could hold my hand, “I’ve seen you drunk before,” he looked down at our hands with a smile. 
“You don’t have to babysit me, Matty G,” I threw my head back in laughter. Matthew looked up at me and shot me a glare at the nickname I so lovingly gave him. 
“Okay, this is true, however… Do you still want me to go home with you?” he smiled at me, already knowing the answer to his question. I let out a deep sigh as I looked at him.
“Yes, Matthew,” I looked back down at the table and muttered. Matthew squeezed my hand, causing me to look up at him. “I’d love it if you came home with me,” I smiled as I leaned over the table to look at him more.
And, after a long twenty-minute wait and casual conversation, a cab pulled into the parking lot. Matthew had a certain cockiness to him as he helped me into the car before getting in beside me.
“You good?” He looked down at me with a small smile. I nodded and looked at my lap. “You look pretty tired,” he chuckled lightly as he moved closer to me.
“Yeah, yeah. Long day, and then late night,” I sighed as I leaned into his side. Matthew laughed as he invited me into his side more and wrapped an arm around me. I looked up at him and smiled. “I hope I didn’t take you away from someone important at the bar,” I whispered as I looked at him. 
“No, no, it’s okay. My friends won’t even notice I left,” he waved off my lame ass apology. I laughed as I sat up a bit.
“That’s a shame,” I sighed and looked down at my lap, “I’d notice if you left,” I looked back up at him with a small smile. He stared at me for a moment. Neither of us had words to say anymore. But the silence between us wasn’t awkward. 
“I would hope you would notice if I left. Then that’d mean the cab door was wide open,” he laughed as he gestured towards the door. I laughed and shook my head. It took me a minute to notice that our faces had drifted closer together. “I appreciate the sentiment though,” he smiled softly. I laughed and nodded. 
I smiled as we stared at each other. Every few seconds Matthew would flick between my eyes and my lips, and I know I was doing the same thing. I definitely did want to kiss him. I’m sure he knows he’s got that kind of effect on people. And if you’ve known him for as long as I have… 
“Please tell me you want the same thing I want,” I spoke so softly. I knew he heard me because a smile slowly grew on his lips. He brought his hand to rest on my cheek before closing the space between us. I hummed against his lips and pushed my hands through his hair, tugging on it lightly.
After a moment he pulled me into his lap, my legs on either side of his waist. I wrapped my arms around his neck as I tried to get closer to his body. His hands were planted firmly on my hips, keeping me in place over every bump the vehicle went over.
“Uhm… We’re at your stop,” the poor driver spoke up. I pulled away from Matthew with wide eyes and a smile on my lips. Matthew returned the smile as he pushed me off his body. 
“Give him a $700 dollar tip. Oh my god,” I whispered as I slipped out of the car. He smiled at me as he pulled out his wallet. I pressed the door shut as I looked into the car. He spoke a few words to the driver before handing him some money. Moments later he slipped out of the car and walked beside me.
“He said to have a very good night,” Matthew looked down at me with a smile. I laughed and nodded. He wrapped an arm around my body and walked close beside me. 
“Oh, I’m sure you will have a very nice night,” I cooed as I poked his nose. He smiled and pulled me closer to his body. I fumbled for my keys, which I was so fortunate to stick in my pockets and not my bag, as we neared the front door.
I fumbled a little bit more as I tried to unlock the door. Matthew’s body was distractingly close to mine. It was impossibly hard to get the damn door unlocked. 
Once the door finally swung open, Matthew and I were already back on each other. He pressed my body against the door and I already struggled to push his coat off. 
“Bedroom,” I pointed towards the stairs, hoping he’d figure it out from there. He nodded, pushing his coat off before picking me up from the knees. I yelped from the surprise before I wrapped my arms around his neck. 
“Careful,” I mumbled as he nearly tripped over the first and second steps. He hummed, pressing his lips to my neck, leaving sloppy kisses on my skin. I dropped my head to the side and allowed him to have more space. My hands found their way into his hair, and my fingers got tangled in the locks at the base of his neck. 
“Which room is yours,” Matthew asked, his voice a low growl in my ear. 
“That way,” I pointed in a vague direction that I hoped he would figure out. After a moment, he pushed a door open with his foot and he muttered something into my ear. It was so incoherent, but I didn’t care.
My fingers struggled to unbutton his shirt but succeeded once we were closer to my bed. And, once he set me down on the bed, I pulled my own shirt off and tossed it to the ground. A smile grew across my lips when I saw that he was shirtless. 
He pushed me back on the bed before hovering over me. I stared up at him before he kissed me.
{***}{***}{***}
“Fuck,” Matthew muttered as he panted. I looked over at him with tired eyes. He had one hand pushed through his hair as he stared at the ceiling. “Fuck,” he muttered again.
“Are… Matthew, are you okay?” I slowly sat up and looked down at him. The way he was sweating looked like glitter in the little bit of light was in the room. “Do you need, like, water or something?” I pushed myself off the bed slowly. 
“Yeah, yeah… Sorry, water would be great,” he looked over at me for half a moment before looking away again. I nodded as I grabbed for a shirt (whether it was mine or Matthew’s, I didn’t care), threw it on, and went to the kitchen.
I wasn’t sure if I wanted to be quick or not getting the water for him. So, I grabbed two glasses of water and a snack before slowly returning to the bedroom.
Honestly, I was expecting Matthew to still be lying in bed, asleep… Not sitting at the foot of the bed, fully clothed and putting his shoes on. I would have dropped the water if I hadn’t set them on my dresser first.
“What… What are you doing?” I asked as I moved to stand in front of him. He looked up at me, his hair all in his face as he looked at me.
“Going home?” He spoke smoothly before standing back up. I dropped my shoulders. It was now my turn to look back up at him. 
“You’re just going to leave? Just like that? A fucking one night stand?” I scoffed as I watched him straighten his shirt. He turned on his heel and looked at me. “I knew I shouldn’t have…” I sighed deeply and stepped out of his way. “Go ahead then, just leave,” I looked at him with a certain disgust. His eyes flashed with an apologetic look before he left my room and my home altogether. 
I stared at my bed for a moment before grabbing a blanket from the closet and made way to the living room. God knows I’m not sleeping in my bed tonight.
{***}{***}{***}
Something was… Wrong. And, no, no it wasn’t the fact that I fucked one of my best friends. No… Something was wrong with me. I felt off. Maybe it was the fact that he hasn’t said a word to me since I told him to leave however many weeks ago.
Or maybe it was because I’ve been sitting on the floor in my bathroom, staring at the timer on my phone waiting for a timer to hit 0 so I could find out either the best news in my entire life or possibly the worst news of my entire life. It honestly depends entirely on how you look at the situation at hand.
So, when the timer on my phone beeped, I looked down at the object in hand with wide eyes. I couldn’t tell if I was crying or not, but there was an unwelcome dampness on my cheeks that was bothering me. No, no. Why would the tears be what’s bothering me when the stupid thing in hand was telling me something I didn’t want to know.
Pregnant…
Okay, okay, it’s not the end of the world. Could be worse… Maybe? I couldn’t even tell you why this was the end of the world. Oh, wait… No, I could, I definitely could tell you. Again, it depends on how you look at the situation...
I’m pregnant with my best friend and co-worker’s baby. Yeah. Yeah, that is pretty bad. He isn’t even talking to me. I don’t think he’s talked to me since that night we slept together.
“What the hell am I going to tell Matthew,” I whispered, staring at the pregnancy test with wide eyes.  
{***}{***}{***}
“Yeah, ever since that one got knocked up” AJ laughed as she nodded towards me. I looked at her with wide eyes and shook my head. Matthew was standing right behind her, considering he had just entered the room. "Ever since you said you’re pregnant we’ve had to postpone girls’ night,”
“AJ,” I muttered as I looked down at the ground. She looked over at me with wide eyes before looking over her shoulder to finally see Matthew.
“Oh, hey, Gubes,” she muttered as she looked at him. I finally looked up at him with wide eyes. He pushed past AJ and everyone around him before coming to stand in front of me.
“Hi, Matthew,” I whispered, keeping my eyes off his face. Actually, I looked anywhere but his face. I didn’t want to look at him at all. Mostly because if I looked at him I’d have to face the horrors that have been my last month.
The group around us began their quiet murmurs to each other, and they’d consisted of me and Matthew and our incredibly unexpected news if that’s what it could be called. I wanted to look around at everyone, silently telling them off. I wished AJ or someone would disperse the group, but I knew no one would leave. They wanted to stay for the drama that was about to unfold.
“You’re pregnant?” His voice was stern and low as he talked to me. He was standing right in front of me, blocking the conversation from everyone in the room. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Do we have to do this right now,” I asked, keeping my voice low. I knew everyone would be listening to our conversation. There was no stopping that, or the conversation that was about to happen between Matthew and I.
"Yes, I think we do have to do this right now." He returned stepping closer to me. I looked up at him and felt a familiar wetness on my cheeks. I quickly wiped my eyes as I looked around the room. Everyone was staring at us, trying to listen in on the drama. 
I grabbed his hand and pulled him into my make-up room. A slight commotion came from the crowd as we left the room. I’m sure they were all asking AJ what the problem was. Of course, I told AJ, she’s the only person, other than Matthew, I would hang out with from set. And, of course, I told other people on set. AJ’s just the person who knows information I didn’t share with everyone else.
After I pressed the door shut, I slowly turned to face Matthew. He was still standing, looking at me with his hands in his pockets. The expression on his face only stressed me out more. He was angry, pissed. The air was so tense, I swear it was suffocating. There was no longer a calm before this storm. There hasn’t been a calm since I slept with Matthew. Just a hurricane of stress and shock and disappointment. 
“When I asked if we had to do this right now, I meant did we have to do it in front of everyone we know?” I spoke in a harsh whisper as I stepped to him. I pushed him so he was sitting in the chair and still looking up at me. “Because, now we have to go back out there and deal with them when we’re done talking,” I turned around so I was facing the counter that held all my tools and make-up.
“Why… Why didn’t you tell me? Why did I have to find out through AJ?” Matthew looked at me. I looked at the counter, trying to keep my focus on my job instead of the situation at hand. I was having too many thoughts at once and being interrogated by Matthew didn’t help at all. “Is it mine?” he asked. I honestly didn’t like the insinuation in his accusatory tone. That insinuation being that I sleep with so many men (and/or women). The last man I slept with was, in fact, Matthew. 
“Yes! It is yours! You’re the last person I slept with! So there’s no one else it could belong to. I don’t sleep around in my spare time,” I scoffed as I looked at all the brushes in front of me. “Idiot,” I muttered to myself. I was calling myself an idiot, not Matthew. Granted, we’re both the idiots in this situation, unfortunately.
“Okay, that still doesn’t answer my question… Why didn’t you tell me?” Matthew’s tone was annoyed. I rolled my eyes and shrugged.
“Because you’ve been ignoring me,” I shrugged again, picking up the bigger makeup brush. I grabbed the closest pallet, not even caring if it was the one I needed or not, and started to distract myself. “Because you won't answer my calls or texts… you've been ignoring me here! I didn't know what to do," I tried to keep my voice low, just in case anyone walked by and heard my shouting. “I didn’t expect you to be the type of guy to sleep with someone and then ignore them, Matthew,” I scoffed as I turned around to face him. I kept my eyes down on the pallet as I moved the brush across his face.  
“I wasn’t ignoring you,” he insisted. I had to hold back my laughter as I shook my head.
“It sure felt like it to me,” I muttered as I looked up at him. “I’m sorry you had to find out through AJ, okay? It was hard to talk to you when you always requested Marnie to do your make-up, or you go talk to someone else the second you see me approaching you…” I scoffed and shook my head.
“How long have you known?” Matthew looked up at me, his voice was soft as he spoke. It took everything in me to not feel bad. I shouldn’t feel bad. He was the asshole in this situation. 
“A month,” I whispered as I tossed the brush to the counter behind me. “Month and a half… I don’t know. When did we sleep together? Because it was a few weeks after that,” I shrugged as I looked down at the ground. Matthew looked up at me with wide eyes, clearly more shocked about this news. “I tried telling you, Matthew. It was just hard when you…” 
“I wasn’t ignoring you,” he pressed. I dropped my shoulders and stared at him.
“I swear to god if you say that you weren’t ignoring… I might punch on you in the stomach,” I stated matter-of-factly. Matthew looked at me with wide eyes and nodded slowly as he took in my words. “And, I’m like a month, maybe two months, pregnant… Don’t fucking fight me,” I spoke, but made sure I ended my statement with a smile. 
“Okay, okay,” Matthew raised his hands as some sort of surrender, “I was ignoring you.. I was… I don’t typically sleep with my best friends,” he looked at me as he lowered his hands. I stared at him with a pointed expression on my face. “I just wasn’t sure what happened. I didn’t know if that’d ruin our friendship. I love my friendship with you. And, if fucking you fucked over my friendship with you,” he looked at me with a sort of sadness in his eyes. “It turns out I did fuck up becau-”
“Hold on… Do you regret sleeping with me?” I cut him off, feeling sudden ball anxiety in my stomach. 
“What?! No! That’s not what I said! Or… Or what I meant, even!” Matthew half-shouted, and it made me jump back. Once he realized that he scared me, he instantly softened and became apologetic. “I don’t regret sleeping with you. I was just scared that I was going to mess up,” his voice softened as he spoke. 
“Mess up,” I scoffed and shook my head, “Mess up what? I got pregnant! Was that a worry that you had? Or… Or...”
“I didn’t want to lose our friendship. That’s how I was worried I’d mess up.” He lowered his voice. I stared at him and dropped my shoulders. “And… Obviously, I didn’t want or mean for you to get pregnant,” he whispered. I swallowed roughly and wiped my eyes. God, I hate that crying was a thing and that it keeps happening. I’m happy it was quiet for a minute. No shouting or arguing. Just silence. "I just don't understand how it happened," Matthew mumbled as I turned to grab a different brush. I involuntarily rolled my eyes and shook my head.
"Oh, I don't know… maybe it's because we had sex or something," I said under my breath. He looked up at me with mild shock in his eyes. I dropped my hand to my sides as I looked at him. I tossed the brush back to the counter behind me. “God sometimes I forget that you’re not actually Spencer Reid and just you,” I whispered as I placed my hands on his cheeks. He looked up at me with innocent eyes. “You should know condoms don’t always work,” I stared at him with wide eyes. He looked up at me with a somewhat excited, yet exhausted look in his eye. “Especially if you keep them tucked in your wallet,” I gently patted his cheeks before pulling them away from his face.
“Are you… Are you going to keep it,” Matthew asked, keeping his voice low as he tested the waters with his questions. I sighed deeply as I leaned against the counter behind me.
“Was planning on it,” I glanced at his face as I spoke. The way he shifted in his seat made me a little nervous, and I couldn’t tell you why. “I understand if you don’t want anything to do with it… I won’t, like, berate you for money or ruin your life or anything,” I shrugged as I crossed my arms over my chest. Matthew looked up at me with wide eyes.
“Of course I want to be in its life, don’t be ridiculous,” he scoffed. I looked up at him and raised an eyebrow. I could feel some of the tension in my shoulders and body slip away at his words. I was, in all honesty, prepared to do the whole single parenting thing. Even though I didn’t want to. I think I was more unprepared for Matthew to say he’d be a part of the kid’s life. 
“You’re not just saying that?” I swallowed roughly as I looked at him. He laughed lightly and shook his head. 
“I’m not just saying that. I promise,” he finally stood up and looked down at me, “Sorry that I was ignoring you. And… Sorry I got you, well… You know,” he gestured to my stomach. I smiled as I placed a hand on my almost showing stomach.
“You had me worried I wasn’t a good lay, Matthew,” I laughed lightly and looked up at him. He smiled softly and shrugged. “Okay, okay, co-parenting?” I asked, raising an eyebrow. Matthew cocked his head to the side as he placed his hands on both my arms.
“I mean if that’s what you want. Also, whoever said you were the worst lay?” He scoffed with playful laughter. I returned the laughter and shook my head.
“Well, you were a pretty bad lay,” I shrugged and crossed my arms over my chest. Matthew just smiled before pulling me against his chest and wrapping his arms around me. I let my shoulders relax in his embrace.
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smugraccoon137 · 3 years
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Supergirl Season 2 episode 8 Medusa review part 2
If your curious part 1 was just my breakdown of Kara and Mon-els relationship that got way too long. But as always SPOILERS AND GAY THOUGHTS AHEAD
Me and kel get so excited when Lenas in an episode. Like practically giddy. I can’t help smiling when shes on screen honestly. And yes Katie McGrath is beautiful, but beyond that such a pretty smile and lovely voice. I’m sure ratings started to spike when she joined the cast. Okay enough about pretty girls on to the review 
Tipsy fucking Alex though guys I can’t get over this mess of a person. 
Alex: if I have to come out to my mom then I choose to do it drunk
Kara: no your not *yoinks beer*
Alex: wait no my coming out juice
Kara Danvers sneaky sneaker extraordinaire can totally interview Lena and find out Cadmus things without anyone knowing. The confidence this goofball has is top tier
Underrated relationship: Alex and Winn though. I really really love Winn and honestly Alex is such big sister energy to both him and Kara. 
wow Lenas pretty in the interview scene. A touch of auburn hair from the sunlight really makes this shot and we never get to see her with her hair down. Fan service honestly, or maybe she heard a certain beef cake reporter was gonna come by and wanted to dazzel her.
Lena: hair up is for business. Hair down is for flirting friendship time with Kara
Poor baby thinks she falls short nooooo. Your doing your best godamn your only like 25 jesus. Kara give her a hug she needs love and affection
Kara thinks shes being so sneaky in this interview. Such a golden retriever, bad at sneakin. As soon as she toes the line Lena catches on and kicks her out. Really good acting in the scene, the subtle change in expression to show Lenas guard raising. Good job Katie.
Real quick Lena why is your office so ugly? How do you keep it clean? You spend 99% of your days in this place and its whiter than a hospital room. I hate it. Why is your desk an oval? and why does it have a hole in it? Kara cant eat you out in secret anymore damn. 
OOHHHhhhh noooo the fucking gas bomb in the bar what the fuck. EVERYBODIES DEAD JESUS WHAT WAS THAT
Poor Mon-el. What happened at the bar was fucked up, and he feels like its fault when its obviously not.
Love that he and Kara are having bro time playing some Monopoly. Oh no not Kara asking if he likes her. Honestly thought these two had good chemistry in this scene. Im a sucker for dumbass not understanding certain words and phrases. So Kara having to reiterate her questions and finally being like “You don’t want to mate with me do you?” was super fun. Omegaverse vibes mfs. Although I am confused by mon-els reaction “I mean have you seen the kind of women I’ve been attracting?” I honestly don’t know what this means.
Kara internal reaction though: Oh thank god
Wow Kara really just has no regard for her own life, huh? she just opens the door and possibly contaminates herself. It’s good to want to help people, but love you gotta care about yourself too
Good reveal with the fortress of solitude. Oof Kara gonna feel like its her fault all those aliens died and mon-els sick. They do a really good job of showing Karas relationship with her parents through their holograms. She wants so badly to see them again, to talk to them. And she can, but not really. They just aren’t real.
Lena cattily to her mother: im used to celebrating holiday weekends alone at my desk
me to Kara: please invite her to thanksgiving
Okay so Lena being adopted is another interesting parallel to Kara. Also the fact that both Kara and Lena fall into there families shadows, and are left behhind or forgotten. Really interesting how Lena and Karas relationship is so similar to Clark and Lex’s for obvious purposes. Though the CW queer coding the fuck out of their relationship in Smallville really only adds to Supercorp fever. Its always been Homoerotic subtext Harold!
Me watching Lena and Lillian trade verbal blows: Wow ya’lls relationship is fucked up. Lex and Lionelle would spar and fence but you two are on another level jesus
oooooof that last line. 
Lena: I know your lying
Lillian: and how could you possibly know that?
Lena: because you told me you loved me. And we both know thats not true
Who wrote this jesus fuck my heart. The PAIN.
Bonus thought Lena thinks Karas smart. Goofball beefcake sneaky sneakster who doesnt know the difference between flirting and friendship is smart she thinks. I love these idiots
Wow Kara just doesn’t wait huh? Oh cadmus is going to be at LCorp? Not on my watch. Lena’s there. I know this because I tune into her heart beat just to check on her cus she likes to work late. Don’t worry Alex it’s for friendship reasons.
That LCorp security guard got princess carried for .2 seconds. Best moment of his life.
God its like dark out. Lenas working on a holiday weekend into the night. I hate this, give her friends.
Lena looks so scared when Kara gets thrown into the giant LCorp sign
And then hurt Kara looking up at her with dread.
Kara internal: fuck don’t come out now. I came here to save you
God I love the protectiveness. Its *chefs kiss*. Hank throwing the beam at Lena and Kara even in her hurt state throwing herself in front of it. Sometimes self sacrifice is gay. But how Lena looks at her after wards like “I can’t believe I’m alive. I can’t believe she chose to save me”. Met with a gruff “Get out of here!”. mm yes this is my kind of content. Fight for me.
I was robbed an aftercare scene but I doubt it will be the last time. (*COUGHS* the “im leaving” phone call *COUGHS*)
Talking about the virus Eliza: what about Lena Luthor?
Kara: What about her?! (super defensive is also a super power maam)
Winn: Luthors can be pretty good actors
Kara: No, I looked into LENAS EYES. She doesn’t know anything about cadmus or her mother
J’onzz: Would you stake Mon-els life on that?
well I guess that really puts Lena and Mon-el right next to each other in priorities huh? Which one is more important? 
Wow Lena totally has a crush on Supergirl after that. Flustered dork. 
Lena: *laughs nervously* you know that doors not really an entrance
Kara: *upsettit stone face pupper*
Lena: :,) 
Okay but the way Lena just says “Anything” all breathless and helpful when Kara says she needs her help. Shes crushin hard
Kara tells Lena her mother is in charge of Cadmus. 
Lena: >:(
Annnd the crush is dead. That did not last long. Really love that Lena has such a different relationship with Kara vs Supergirl though, good dynamic having her reactions so different. Which I believe actually relates as a Clark and Lois parallel? Seeing as how Lois has two separate relationships with Clark and Superman. 
OOf the way Lenas throat bobs with genuine sadness because who she thought Supergirl was is wrong. Shes just like the rest of them. Thinks Lena is just another crazy Luthor. It hurts
Kara: I know what its like to be disillusioned by our parents, but Im a pretty good judge of character, and you are not like your mother. She is cold and dangerous. And you are too good and too smart to follow in her path. Be your own Hero.
Wow just what a good line. They are capable of some things here and there arent they? Melissa's delivery on this is excellent. And the way Katie McGrath is able to show such depth of sadness and bitterness even from a shot of her BACK is really cool. Great acting in this scene in particular. And I can see why the “desperation to be good” is such a highlighted part of these two relationship. Its the one thing in common between Lena and Supergirl, the place where they can meet in the middle. And the way Lena looks after her as she leaves! AHHH thats the good shit, the pining
Okay big Mon-el scene in coming so if you dont want to hear my ranting skip over this part. 
Funny how as soon as Kara has this big impactful scene with Lena full of tension and emotion the writers were like: shit we almost forgot Mon-els dying. 
Kara: *staring sadly back into Lenas office kind of wanting to go back in*
Writers: *cough cough* KARA He’s DYINGGGG
Kara: Oh shit right. Mon-el Oh no. My *looks at poorly written handwriting on her palm* romantic interest?
Wow Mon-el looks like shit, poor guy. Someone swaddle this pillow princess and get him some soup.
Heres a question. Kara is visibly upset that Mon-el is dying. Is it because she’s sad that the guy shes likes is dying. Because her friend is dying? Because her father created the virus thats killing him (what the writers want us to think)? Or because no matter what Kara does the people she loves keep falling through the cracks and shes helpless to stop it?
Her parents. Clark. Her adoptive father. Now Lena. Now Mon-el. Why can’t she ever do anything? Why is it always her fault? This poor kid has some deep seeded abandonment issues
Mon-el: you know you look beautiful with the weight of all these worlds on your shoulders.
I do remember my reaction here, cus I thought this was a weird line. A line that was obviously meant to be romantic and complimentary, but it felt unsettled in my stomach. Coming back and watching the scene it sits even more uncomfortably there. He obviously means well, but this line is kind of just shitty. Its a very selfish and unthoughtful thing to say to someone. 
Kara’s entire fucking life has revolved around other people and making sure they are happy and taken care of. But having “failed” at such a young age to do the impossible things asked of her (carrying on Kryptons legacy, raising Clark) she overcompensates. Any normal person would just make their life revolve around their family and friends, not healthy but it works. But Kara feels responsibility over an entire world of lost people and lives. So the amount she overcompensates is ungodly. She does have the weight of worlds on her shoulders. This is not a joke or hyperbole. Its just her life. And thats so fucking shitty. And to have someone actually see that and acknowledge it. To make it a reality so to speak. Then to have them say “yeah you look good like this” while you’re a shaking Atlas being crushed. It is just a little too much isn’t it? That pain to have someone see you finally, and then completely miss the point. For them to go “oh wow your so strong. your so brave” instead of “let me help you. you shouldn’t have to do this at all, forget by yourself. But now I am here”. 
I imagine this was the scene that crowned my darling himbo boy Mon-Hell? Which is so unfortunate. I hope Im wrong, but I feel that his character might just end up a big missed opportunity
I want everyone to know that me and Kel screamed through the entire enxt few seconds of the scene. We knew the kiss was coming from how they were building it up. But god was it painful, especially for it to be delivered after a line like THAT. But yeah very loud angry screaming
Also not to be that bitch but Kara and Mon-els scene was a total of 1:53 RT, and Kara and Lenas ran at a 1:57 RT. Just sayin...
No Lena don’t be evil thats too sexy...
Okay but the way that Lena just tricks Lillian is so good. Shes so clever. And added bonus she makes her ask for her help, which is nice actually. Lillian's obvious vice is weakness and that is often shown in embarrassment. A woman like this asking for help borders that line of weakness and its nice to see on such a dislikable character. Lena didn’t just get what she wanted she got a point over her mother.
Lena looks good in the purple coat. Repeat she is pretty
Love the mental chess game between Lena and Lillian. Lena offering help right off the bat and giving her the isotope free of charge. And then Lillian making Lena launch the virus to prove herself. Good stuff.
Kara appears: don’t do it Lena!
Lena: why not? im a luthor
Okay so obviously Lena switched the Isotope and the Virus won’t work. But thats what makes this line so perfect. Throwing it back in Supergirls face. Like “Yeah, Im a luthor. And Ill show you what im capable of.” But instead of mass death and destruction Lena saves the day. She saved thousands of lives, and its because shes a Luthor that she was able to do that. Really nice way to full circle that 
Wow Lillian really just starts booking it without Lena, huh? bitch
I really love the scene of the virus falling all around National City. The choice of an orangish snow falling was a really really good one. Paired with some excellent music for the mid season finale.
Its sad but I do love Hank just being ready and at peace with death. Im sure he misses his wife and daughters. 
Okay but Lena calling the cops is tea. Send your mom to jail honey. 
So we’re really not gonna talk about how Lena saved everyones asses? Like don’t you think Supergirl would want to talk to the woman that A) kind of tricked her, and B) saved National City. Thats just what makes sense??? But no we’re going to ignore that the DEO is a kind of shit at their job sometimes. And that the woman that they were accusing of having a part to play in all the xenophobic shit is the one who did their job. BY HER SELF. 
Okay rant over. This was a long one review dear god. Really really good episode though. I enjoyed rewatching all the scenes even if it was a mixed bag of feelings. Thanks for reading hope you enjoyed all the screaming!
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screensirenfic · 3 years
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A Curse In Your Name - Chapter 22 - Confessional
“Whoaaaahh! We’re half way there!! WHOOAAHHH! Li-ving on a pra-yer!”
Wailed Satoru; the boy having somehow managed to commandeer a karaoke machine from somewhere, and was currently butchering the back catalogue of Jon Bon Jovi.
“Take my hand! Come on; Mika-Chan; take it! We’ll make it I swear! Whoahhh! Living on a prayer!”
He continued; waving his hand towards her in the vain hope she might join in; Satoru not content in solely making a fool of himself, but insisting he roped her into join too.
“I think I’ll pass this time…”
She brushed off his request, the blonde having finished his solo, yet he was still intent on her joining him for a duet, long fingers pulling at her own in a bid to make her cave.
“Come on; Mika-Chan! Just one duet; I’ll even let you pick the song..!”
He pleaded with those wide blue eyes, a dangerous weapon even behind the tinted lenses of his sunglasses, yet still she held strong.
“No, no! My throat is hoarse; maybe next time…”
She offered if only to placate him; Satoru luckily too drunk on both booze and the tipsy adoration of their classmates to be too persistent.
“Fine; but you owe me a song, next time…”
He relented, firing a finger gun at her as he returned to his adoring public, ready to serenade them with a rather upbeat rendition of Heroes.
Free from Satoru’s begging, and not really feeling the party, Mikasama allowed herself to slip out of the dorm room, threading her way between necking first years and chattering groups as she made her way outside.
It was honestly a lot cooler out there; both in temperature and in atmosphere. 
No blaring music numbing her eardrums; no sweaty bodies pressed up against her in her own damn living room, no drunk teenagers spilling cheap beer over her favourite shirt.
Just being able to lean against the dorm wall and breathe in the crisp air got her thinking about the earlier events that had her so bothered.
A woman had died!
She’d been mercilessly slaughtered in front of their very eyes for just doing her job, and they were celebrating?!
Granted; for them it was weeks ago, but for her it felt so fresh it may as well have happened this morning.
Was this what Jujutsu Sorcerers were like?
Apathetic and unmoved by the existence of mere mortals; completely innocuous to their deaths and suffering simply because they were not gifted to see it coming beforehand?!
It explained a lot about her father.
His absence and distance over the years was almost textbook, and yet it still didn’t satisfy her.
If this was what she was to become; then maybe she didn’t want it anymore, not that anyone asked her what she wanted in the first place-
“You okay?”
Her runaway train of depressing thoughts were interrupted by the voice of Getou; the dark haired boy having found his way out of the party and to her side.
“Yeah; I’m fine. I just needed some air…”
She replied, not really lying, but considering Seguru was one of those Sorcerers, she wasn’t sure he’d see the truth the way she did.
“I get it. Satoru’s idea of partying can be a little intense sometimes…”
He nodded sympathetically, mistaking her melancholy for party burnout as he leant against the wall next to her.
“It’s not that… it’s just… don’t you ever get tired of seeing people dying..?”
She asked, deciding to come clean, as this was Getou; and if anyone was going to get her in this place, it was him.
“Every day…”
He admitted almost resignedly, as if he’d accepted collateral damage as part of his existence.
“I’ve seen husbands die in their wives’ arms as they sob and beg for me to save them, helpless to intervene because a Curse has desecrated their body in an attempt at more power…”
He explained ominously, dark eyes that seemed older than time staring out into the black as if reliving every memory.
“I’ve seen children die before their parents; their bodies no longer recognisable as human from Curses who think it right to twist them to their will…”
He continued, the images he painted darker and more horrible than anything she could’ve imagined, staring into Getou’s face as he relived each moment with that stoic look that took the place of pain.
“I’ve seen people young and old, rich and poor, die at the hands of Curses without so much as a chance to say goodbye. A whole litany of bodies with names too numerous to recount…”
He said; a frown creasing his smooth face in a way that let her have a glimpse of what he’d carried over all these years; of all the many souls a boy of seventeen felt no choice but to take with him in an endless quest for justice.
“And yet I remember all of them and carry them with me whenever I fight…”
He told her; steady hand gripping at his belt as if he expected to find a sword there, the words spoken like a solemn vow of vengeance in their name.
“There is not much I can do to save the living; I’ve accepted that now, but what I can do is avenge the dead.”
He told her, dark eyes staring back at her as if to invite her to join him on his quest; Getou strangely intense for a boy so young, but in a different way from Satoru.
Seguru Getou was cool steel wrapped in soft velvet; a perfect balance of elegance and danger that he maintained through easy smiles and sharp eyes.
He was pretty too, in a clean-cut almost cinematic way.
He had a dignified, almost regal appearance; long high cheekbones that just brushed the corners of intelligent dark eyes, a straight thin nose that tapered into a sharp tip, thin pretty lips that would shift into a slight smirk when he found something amusing. 
The kind of boy you’d see in posters of designer clothes and fancy cars; the kind of boy you felt your grubby hands were too soiled to touch, yet you longed to do it anyway.
Her eyes fell from his face to his mouth once more, inspecting the hard line between his lips that held no humour, no mirth, her body slowly gravitating towards it as if pulled in by an unseen force.
Getou had kissed her like it mattered before; soft and intense and warm at the same time. 
Sure; she knew he’d lied to her. That there was no way his lips had not been on another’s when he was that good, but at the moment she just didn’t care
She’d kissed him before, so why shouldn’t she do it again..?
Her lips touched his in the smallest ghost of a peck; Mikasama afraid to open her eyes less she be met with outrage, instead putting all of her focus in the feel of his soft skin against her own.
To her surprise, he didn’t draw back, just leaned into it ever so slightly, one of his hands coming to rest on the back of her neck in a gentle guide.
He didn’t push forward; didn’t open his mouth and attempt for more in the way she knew Satoru would, just comfortably let her take the lead as he lingered against her mouth; the smooth taste of some sort of sake clinging to his lips more so than even her kiss.
She enjoyed it, wondering if she should open her mouth and instigate more, but far too soon it was over; Getou breaking away to resume his former formality at a respectful distance.
“Mhm… we should probably go back inside…”
He cleared his throat before making the suggestion, Mikasama’s only recompense; the hint of a blush that spread across his cheeks wherever they did anything remotely romantic.
“Yeah…”
She nodded, her breath still slightly caught from the kiss, Mikasama slowly trailing after him as they returned to the heat of the party.
——————————————————
“You wanted to speak to me..?”
Mikasama asked, approaching her father now Satoru and the boy had left, her tense arms crossed over her chest in a position that wasn’t intended to be standoffish, but came across that way regardless.
“Yes. The Itadori boy. What’s your opinion of him..?”
He asked, her father surprising her for once with his apparent deference to her judgment; the man’s god complex rivalling Gojo’s at times.
“You want to know my opinion..?”
She asked, almost laughing at the thought, because it had never mattered before when it counted, so why should it matter now..?
“Yes. Hence why I asked…”
He semi-snapped at her, already intrinsically familiar with his daughter’s drollness and temper, though it didn’t mean he could stomach it any less.
“Do you think Satoru was right in bringing him here?”
He questioned; the truth hidden behind the lie on whether she believed Gojo was acting in his own self-interest in retaliation to the Elders, or whether she genuinely believed the boy could be of use to them.
“It’s hard to say this early on…”
She answered; her loyalties neither entirely lying with that of the school, nor with her wayward soulmate who’s power had often surpassed his judgment as of late.
“The boy is powerful, and has shown capability at controlling Sukuna in a way I’ve not witnessed before…”
She explained to him; her mind flashing back to the selfless acts of bravery he committed even before he absorbed the Curse, and his own constraint and conscience when the King Of Curses had tried to violate her later on.
“Yes, but is he dangerous?!”
Her father snapped, cutting right to the point as her family’s inherent impatience reared its head once more.
“Who’s to say… isn’t everything to do with Jujutsu Sorcery dangerous..?”
She shrugged, unwilling to be held to a responsible in terms of the safety of letting an all-powerful Curse walk around trapped in the body of a fifteen year old.
“Mikasama…”
He warned in a low tone, making it clear he wasn’t about to play word games with her over this.
“As in whether I think Yuji Itadori is a danger; then no. The boy shows remarkable restraint and compassion, and I’m not inclined to believe he’d be led easily astray…”
She said, her confidence in the pink-haired boy unshakable after the humanity he’d shown even at the mercy of the Curse; the boy indeed more human than most of the Sorcerers she knew.
“And Sukuna?”
He asked, pointing out the elephant in the room she’d not dared to discuss.
“He’s the King Of Curses. Whether he’s dead or alive, he can never be considered safe…”
She replied honestly; the truth of the Curse’s true nature sending a shiver down her spine.
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fmdaidynnarchived · 3 years
Text
i am free from work finally so i am here to bring you a wonderful plot call for all four of my children (aidynn, jaeyeol, maverick, and kyubok)! below the cut i left what activities they’ll all be getting up to and little blurbs and ideas. so, if you’re interested in plotting, feel free to like this and i will come visit you or send me something on disc*rd or ims (aidynn is best for this).
aidynn
boy is staying in a bungalow because he can’t be bothered with a roommate if he can’t choose who said roomie is, he’s not about it, so he’s in bungalow e
activities wise he’s going to the photography class because he’s an artsy dude so why not do photography woo, even though he has no interest in this he just draws. so free feel to bug him if your muse is doing that
we’re not talking about the second activity (horse boy aidynn is rising on accident)
will be getting day tipsy at brunch because why tf not, he’s a grown adult he does what he wants, come drink with him
if someone wants to he’ll take a trip down to the food truck festival too with you because he claims he’s still a growing boy who needs lots of food
will probs make an appearance at the pool party? possibly? depends? his hoe game isn’t at strong as it once was anymore
jaeyeol
aside from aidynn all of my other children are being social and staying in a villa. jaeyeol just wanted to swim whenever tbh so he’s in villa b, and already has a roomie
activity wise he’ll take part in the fan makeover. i’m sorry to that poor soul, he will do his best. he can do pretty eye looks and pick decent clothing but he’s chaotic and unpredictable i make no promises. come and question his choices or give him advice when doing things
secondly the model jaeyeol agenda returns and he’s gonna take part in the billboard pictorial as well, and while he’s insecure about his body, he knows he’s pretty so he’s okay with this
another one who will be day drinking but he has intentions to get day drunk so come sip mimosas and eat with him, he’ll be having a good time
definitely making a pool party appearance while looking hot
maverick
once again in the villas! they’re in villa e and don’t have a set roommate. they’re mostly emo that duri isn’t in the same one
mav will be participating in the softball tournament as part of team red! they played baseball all through high school and it was their favorite sport to play and they’re quite good at it, so expect good things from them. they’re here to help if someone asks for it! honestly they’re having a good time with this activity
second activity is the billboard pictorial once again. mav doesn’t like modeling in any way really for themself and so they’re more eh on this, maybe come entertain them a bit?
the food truck! mav is a Foodie and will be visiting this festival and eating their heart out
they love a good brunch so they’ll be having a good time at the welcome brunch truly
more than likely ditching the pool party to go hang out with duri ngl, so don’t expect to see them there
kyubok
and lastly! kyubok is in villa f on his own right now when this is posted so woo love that for him
once again kyubok is also playing in the softball tournament for the red team, but he has no clue what he’s doing someone please help this poor unfortunate soul, teaming him how to catch a ball or swing a bat, he needs all the help he can get
then kyubok is going to attend the candle making class a well. he just thought it sounded fun and peaceful. candles are nice. so maybe chat with him about his candle and your candle or life in general
one of the few who won’t be day drinking at brunch and mostly just wants the food because he’s hungry, so come hang out with him maybe
again, a food lover, and will be making a trip to the food truck festival so feel free to join him if you’d like!
he’s on the fence about the pool party but for the love of all that is holy someone drag this boy there and force him to live his life and have fun for once, he needs to live a little
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kiegosbby · 4 years
Text
hawks x f!reader
chapter 8 I think. I’m sorry guys itll get better I promiseeee
word count: 1.6k
warnings: drinking, and just making poor decisions
✁- - - - - - r- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
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when you finished your work you left quickly trying to avoid talking to him any further.
You stopped at a liquor store. This wasn't your best idea. But In the moment, you needed it badly.
you never really drank before, not knowing what to buy so you bought vodka. People drink that straight right?
she bought her bottle and put it in a paper bag, having to keep her hero appearance.
she flew home and sat down on her couch. She popped the cap off and chugged it. It burned as it went down. She thought it would be worse it tasted like medicine. Kind of.
She looked across the room and saw her phone. She was now slightly tipsy, she stood up and walked over to her phone. Picking it up it was slightly cracked but it still worked. You turned it on and while you waited, chugged some more because why the hell not?
as your phone turned on you saw all the messages hawks had left you.
10+ plus new messages from: Birdy ❤️🐔
"Tch.."
Birdy ❤️🐔
Hey baby bird I'm sorry about last night I probably seem like a dick.
Birdy ❤️🐔
I had to help endeavour on a case and I couldn't say no. Please let me make it up to you
Birdy ❤️🐔
I still owe you ice cream even if you don't wanna go out anymore
Birdy ❤️🐔
Don't forget that you have to come to my agency tomorrow and fill out some paperwork and set your office up
Birdy ❤️🐔
Angel where are you? Your 10 minutes late
Birdy ❤️🐔
Angel I'm starting to worry it's been a hour. Please just let me know that your ok
Birdy ❤️🐔
Y/n please text me. Im worried and I swear if anything happened to you I'll kill someone
Birdy ❤️🐔
Don't make me go to your apartment. I will don't test me.
Birdy ❤️🐔
angel please reply
Birdy ❤️🐔
Angel? Please..
Birdy ❤️🐔
I'm about to go to your apartment. I don't know which numbers yours but I'll go through the whole building if I have to.
well now you felt like a bitch.
It was still mean for him to do that to her. But maybe she should forgive him. he apologized and he seemed like he actually cared.
You decided to call him and talk to him. Maybe apologize? Ask him what his favourite drink is. Alcohol is good you should do this more often.
you pressed the call button and took a big swig of your drink getting ready to talk.
"Angel hello?"
"Hey hawks" you slurred your words slightly. "I wanted to call you because it's so difficult to type! The buttons are so little and I keep messing up. Now I know what your thinking, she's drunk right? Well no actually I'm just a little tipsy. Oh! I forgot to say what I was calling about. I wanted to apologize, I was being a total bitch don't you think?" You took a quick swig and went back to talking "but you were kinda mean to me. But I liked you! I even bought a fucking dress for you. And I don't do dresses. Believe that? I got all dressed up for you. And you never showed. But hero duties are more important than anything" you took another swig "damn this shit is strong!"
He sat there trying to take in everything she had just said. To be fair it was a lot to handle. " Y/n your drunk why are you drinking?"
"Because why the hell not?" She said and laughed
"You want to apologize I want to apologize to face to face."
"Come over them Birdy I need some company I can't finish this big bottle all by myself." At this point you really couldn't think straight. This was 100% a bad idea but did you care? Absolutely not.
"Y/n your drunk we should talk tomo-"
"No come over nowwww pleaseeeeeeee" you whined
he sighed "Ok leave the balcony open I'll land there."
"Yay! I'll be waiting for you im so excited!"
You quickly hung up and went to wait for him on the balcony. You sat with your legs crossed and kept drinking. You got up and looked over the ledge. Damn that was a farrr drop. You stumbled a little leaning a little to far, and almost fell until you felt a warm pair of hands wrap around your waist. "Are you fucking crazy kid? Do you have a death wish?"
You started laughing "oh my god I almost fell good thing I have wings. You saved me! Your like my knight in shining armor" you smiled and went to take another swig only to have him take it away from you.
He looked at the bottle. "You drank almost half of this already! Are you crazy? Oh my god come on" he lead you inside trying to figure the layout of your house. He went into your kitchen and got you a water bottle from your fridge.
"Here drink this your gonna need it. Let's go sit down ok?" He lead you to the couch, you almost fell a couple times but with his help you made it.
"Hawksssss"
"Yes angel" he looked over to you, you were both now sitting on the couch, and he was trying to make sure you did nothing stupid.
"Thank you for coming I was sooo lonely. And I'm sorry for this morning I was being a big poopy head" you said and at the end you stuck your bottom lip out and gave him puppy eyes.
"It's no problem angel. I would always help a friend in need more matter what. And you don't have to apologize it was mostly my fault I was being a dumb bird and messed it up." He said looking at you with guilt. You felt bad honestly. But what stuck the most was when he said he would always help a friend..
"I wish we were more then friends I really liek you.." you slurred and went on "your really cute to. And your wings are so pretty I just wanna touch them. Can I touch them?" You asked already reaching out to them
"Of course baby bird just be careful you have wings to so you'll know how it feels." He pulled his wings further out so that you could reach them easily. He was a little scared only a few other people had touched his wings. And they had never been drunk before. His wings were quite sensitive, he was touch starved and that made it feel amazing when someone touched his wings.
You leaned in and touched the middle of his wings first, slowly running your hand over them. You face lit up like a kid opening his presents on Christmas. You raked your hands through his feathers.
"Your feathers are so soft! How do you get them so soft!?" You asked excitedly. Your feathers weren't as soft as his, they'd been through a lot and due to some harsh training were trying to recover still.
"There just n-naturally soft I guess are yours not t-this soft?" He asked as he was trying to keep back his groans. Your fingers felt so good rubbing against his feathers.
"They were but after bad training there not as soft anymore. Want to feel?" She asked excitedly, taking her hands away. He tried to hide his disappointment, and shook his head yes.
she pulled her wings out, giving off a soft glow as her quirk made her. He reached out to his hands. He softly touched the tip of her wings. She sat back and relaxed feeling calm at the touches he was giving her. It was way better then the little kids that tugged on her wings when she had them out.
"What kind of training did this? There still soft just seem like they've been through a lot.."
"Well it was a really rainy day. And they were working me so hard. We were in a empty field and I was paired with one of the higher ranks, so I had to try my hardest. They thought I was weak so they pushed me a little to far, until my wings were covered with mud and all the nasty shit on the ground."
He had a apologetic look on his face as he continued to stroke your wings. "Who's they?"
"I-oh I don't really tell many people but when my parents had found out I had wings, they had to report it to the government, who wanted to put me in intense training from when I was just 4. I knew how to kill someone before I knew how to write my own name correctly. I've heard you went through the same if I'm correct?" Y/n was almost surprisingly sober now.
"Yeah it's not something I like to talk about. I'm sorry they put you through that. Me and you are more alike then we seem arnt we?" He asked while taking his hand away from your wings.
you internally sighed in disappointment when he took his hand away. "I guess we might be. C-can we watch a movie or something?" She asked hoping he would stay just a little longer.
"Only if I can still take you to get ice cream soon?" He asked testing the waters to see if she was still mad.
"Of course you bird brain." She grabbed the remote and turned on  {favourite movie}.
"Oh I love this movie!" He said with excitement as he got comfortable next to you.
You smiled looking at him. You were no longer mad but thought if this went on would that happen again? Would he handle it differently? As the thoughts were running through your mind, you felt the heaviness of sleep washing over you. You closed your eyes and let it involve you.
Hawks POV
I turned to check on y/n, and as I turned she was just falling asleep. Her head slowly made its way into my shoulder. I blushed slightly. Y/n was beautiful. Even with her hair a mess she was still pretty to him.
As he was admiring her, she moved in her sleep, grabbing his arm and hugging it as she slept.
'God she's perfect'
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luvdsc · 3 years
Note
hi miss cat sooooo i feel abit queasy rn?? idk so sTORY TIME :D i have this guy friend,,,, let's call him 'beer' (idk what to call him oKAy OHMYGOD) LMAO. his family and my family are pretty close but we only met personally in the beginning of last year since they moved here to my city and they didn't know anybody else in the area except me n my fam so not only did we helped them move in to their new place but we also helped them familiarize the area. and they would constantly go to our house and vice versa. me being anti social and introverted, i never really interacted with them much?? after eating i would just walk straight back to my room and lock myself up there until they're gone OR.... i would wait for them to leave so i could eat JKGFDJSDKS (i have social anxiety n interactions seem draining at times so i just avoid ppl i'm unfamiliar or uncomfy with ;-;). tURns out,,, we were the same age???? JDFKDKV me and 'beer' got close during my sister's bday party. it was just a small n intimate gathering (only like 5 ppl,, including me n my sis) nd he was invited. my sis was so drunk, we had to bring her up to her room and tuck her into bed,,, my sis friend was in the bathroom puking the night away JDFKSSJNK and the others were just either passed out drunk or just didnt wanna drink anymore. but there was so much drinks left and we didnt want to waste it, so me and 'beer' ended up tryna finish the cocktails that was made since it was such a waste to throw them out and since i was under the consumption of alcohol i became more outspoken and confident than i usually am JFVDSJKVDJK we had a couple drinks earlier so while we were abit tipsy and we looked like crazed people talking and giggling n shit,, we became close after that night. and from there, we became each other's designated "drinking buddies". IDK IF THATS AN ACTUAL THING BUT YEA :D LIEK, EVERYTIME WE DRINK LIKE WE'RE JUST ALWAYS TOGETHER, KINDA LIKE A DUO,, DRUNK PARTNERS IN CRIME OR WHATNOT JKDSKFFJV and we would even make bets on who's had more drinks or sumn. and as time went by, i noticed how he got alittle comfortable with me?? he'd try to like make advances or do some gentlemanly stuff (which he doesn't normally do around me??) at first i didn't rlly mind since he prob was tipsy or something. and then during new year’s,, as in when the clock struck 12 am,, he messaged me and confessed that he started harboring a crush on me and that he had feelings for me ;-; IDK WHAT TO REPLY SO I WAS LIKE: "HAHA U'RE PROB SHITFACED DRUNK RN,, GO TO SLEEP :)" and he was like: "nO IM SERIOUS, IHAVE FEELINGS 4 U, AND NO I DIDNT DRINK ANYTHING TODAY" KJFNXCSKJDVF I JUST LEFT HIM ON READ AFTER THAT CUS IDK WHAT TO DO?? HJSDNDFSKF ++ i'm not rlly into these kind of things and i just dont see him that way,,,, i'm the type wherein if i just don't see anything even just a teeny-tiny spark, it's just NO. + commitment scares me :( i just felt so scared n weirded out so after that i just started avoiding him :// there were times where his fam n him would stop by at our place so i literally just lock myself up in my room whenever they're there and wait til they left. but today, they came again and we all ate dinner together. i sat across him and he greeted me saying "hi". i can only offer him the most awkward smile cus i didn't wanna be rude to him infront of everybody. his sister literally squealed HJFDVKSJK and i think she knew what was going on LMAO. after eating, i went to the kitchen and i was just washing the dishes and he suddenly came in, he seemed so nervous i honestly felt bad :( and he was like tryna bring up the 'confession thing' but the tension was just so bad n awkward. and he was like,, "let me just wash the dishes" and i was like "nO, u're a guest just leave the dishes here and i'll wash) and we were just bickering back and fort having a banter of who's washing the dishes, but i just was so fed up i grabbed his plate and i washed it myself FJBKDNVSJF and he was like,, "we good?" im like"yea?? ig" KFDJNSS idk now it just feels weird, he's cool but i just dont rlly like
him that way and although i admire him for being honest with his feelings abt me, i just dont think we can hangout anymore like we used to. so yea im srry if this is so long holy shit im so sorry. i hope life been treating u well bub!! <33
bdudidkdnfjjdjd oh god, lovebug, this all sounds really awkward, and I totally get how you feel 🤧🤧 like when they say “we’re good?” it’s like that when you say that you’re fine but you’re not really fine meme fjjfkdkffkck 😀😀 because the friendship gets so awkward after that, and it sucks because you see him as a really good friend and really liked hanging out with each other but now feelings made everything weird and you’re never gonna be able to go back to how it was before because those feelings will always be on the back of your mind and the friendship is not the same and you eventually drift apart and god, it just really sucks to lose a friend /: it’s basically the eventual slow death of a friendship and it’s just so complicated and I’m sorry you have to go through that, honey bee ): I hope you’re able to work things out with him tho 💗 and thank you, honey bee !!!! Aside from this, I hope life has been treating you kindly as well, sweetpea 💕
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ellana-ravenwood · 6 years
Text
Salt, Tequila, Lemon - Jason Todd x Reader
Please read this intro, thank you very much :  
So. I posted this yesterday, but after a bug on the Tumblr app on my phone it got deleted. I’m super bummed out because it had over 200 notes and quite a few feedbacks that I never got to read because it was accidentally deleted...If the people that took the time to comment things on the story could take a bit more time to write a little comment again and give me their feedbacks, and also if the people that liked and reblog could do it once more...i’d appreciate the hell out of you <3.  So reposting it (thanks god I always have back ups of all my stories now). Written in twenty minutes during my break at work. Bam. Hope you’ll like it :
Also, since Tumblr’s new guidelines and enforcement of it, I DON’T really appear in searches anymore, so the only way for this story to be seen by others than those who follow me is to reblog it. So if you wanna, you can show your support for my writing by doing just that. Thanks very much. You can find my masterlist here : @ella-ravenwood-archives
_________________________________________________
Ok. So. Grandma’s remedy against heartbreak ? Oh, right. 
Salt. Tequila. Lemon. 
Got it. Licking the back of your hand to make the salt stick to it, you pour yourself a massive shot of “To-Kill-Ya” in your coffee mug, not even caring about the fact that there is still some remnant of your cappuccino from last night in it. 
You focus on the sound the liquid makes as it fills your cup. Makes you think about something else. Good. Yup. This was totally gonna help right now. 
“Cheers”, you exclaim to yourself, your empty apartment echoing your voice. 
Salt. 
Wincing. Stingy. Salt on its own is gross. 
Tequila. 
More wincing. Oh my god, it burns. The coffee that was still at the bottom of the cup is an oddly nice touch. 
Lemon. 
The last of the Wincing. 
You spit the piece of lemon you just bit into in the trash and…miss. The yellow fruit falls with a little flat sound on the floor, and you honestly can’t bother to pick it up. Your apartment is a mess anyway, so you just stare at it angrily and pour yourself another drink. 
Salt. Tequila. Lemon. 
You gulp the last of the citrus and shiver. Miss the trash again. 
Damn. This was good. 
Well, actually, it was disgusting. 
You didn’t like strong alcohol and what the Hell ?! Why did you leave a bit of coffee in your cup ? Now that the aftertaste was kicking in, it was actually really gross. If the tequila itself didn’t make you wanna throw up, the stale coffee taste nearly did. Oh, and the salt and lemon combination was as awful as ever. 
You really didn’t like salt, tequila, or lemon. 
But it was still good. 
Because thanks to all this immediate awfulness, you could slowly feel yourself drift into “haze land”, and forget about your worries. 
Forget that your boyfriend of two years just cheated on you with some random woman you worked with. Woman that, by the way, he met at the Christmas “end of the year” party from you work you invited him to…You gave him free champagne and mise-en-bouche and all your love, and he broke your heart. 
It wasn’t your thing, to drink your sorrow away. And it wasn’t your thing either to wallow because of a man…But you genuinely thought he was “the one” (oh what a mistake you would soon realize that was). 
He was always so nice, treating you like a princess. He complimented you daily, and never forgot an important date. He was affectionate, not to an annoying point. He was the perfectamount of affectionate. He was a gentleman and seemed to love you and yet, he betrayed you. 
If a man like him, that was nothing short but sweet and passionate with you, cheated on you, then did that mean you couldn’t trust anyone ? 
Because in your eyes right now, he was perfect. Albeit said eyes were slightly clouded by a a few tequila shots. 
You were downing a fourth drink starting to slowly sob when…
There’s very few things that can get you out of a drunk state in seconds. 
An extremely cold shower could do the trick, for instance. Brings you back to your senses a bit you know ? You wouldn’t magically be sober, but you’d get a clearer mind. Or someone giving you shocking news ! Or like, an event so incredible that your body just forgets how drunk it is for a minute. 
And this event, for you, came at the perfect time. 
Right when you were entering your “sad drunk” phase, which was between the “lol alcohol does NOTHING to me” phase where you downed most of your drinks, and the “dancing on the bar’s counter” phase (a few more drinks and you would have a one woman dance party in your living room, acting as if you were on a bar’s counter and that your name was suddenly “Britney”).
Right when you were about to wallow times a thousand, and cry, and yell “whyyyyyyy ?!” to the sky, arms in the air (drama queen). 
Years later, looking back on that particular event, you’ll start to realize that Destiny HAS to exist. Because come on, it was just too perfect a timing to be a simple coincidence. 
You were about to swallow up your fifth drink, launching yourself head first into the “sad phase” when an ear shattering noise rang all around your apartment. 
Broken glass. 
It was the sound of broken glass. Heightened to the max by your drunkness. You turned on your stool, and…there he was. 
It was a guy. That you were sure of because he had no boobs and too much pecs. And that guy…well that guy just flew right through your window, destroying it. How rude. 
There was glass everywhere. 
How much did a window cost ? Probably a fortune. 
You wondered briefly if you could just use aluminium foil and tape the shit up. There was nothing of value to steal in your apartment anyway, and if aluminium foil could keep meals warm, it definitely worked with a house too right ? 
You sobered up quite a bit, but you were also very drunk when this event happened, so your mind was still in that cloudy weird phase where your priorities were…interesting. 
You worried more about the broken window at first, than about that guy who just launched through it. 
A guy. 
Not just any guy. 
You saw that guy before. 
He was one of those night vigilante your crazy hometown was filled with…RED HOOD !! 
“Thick thighs”, is the first thing you thought right after you recognized him (priorities). 
The second thing you thought was that you needed another drink, and so you downed what was your fifth one, but with that crazy thing happening ended up being on the same level as if it was a second one. You were tipsy, but not “drunk” anymore. 
The third thing that came to your mind was…Is he still alive ? 
No cause, he was like, just laying there, on your living room’s floor, not moving. 
“…Outch.” 
Oh. He spoke. 
So he ain’t dead. Good, means you can have another drink then, you don’t need a clear mind to call an ambulance or something. 
Oddly enough, in your half-drunk half-sober state, this sounded completely reasonable. Nevermind if Red Hood had some internal bleeding or something. He talked. He was probably fine. 
A minute passed, and you just sat there, sipping up your tequila in between taking a pinch of salt and biting into a piece of lemon. 
Salt, tequila, lemon. Great remedy against heartbreaks. 
Wait, were you heartbroken ? Really ? You couldn’t really recall that fact now. But, yeah…it was the reason why you were drinking right ? Because right now, all you could think about was the fact that this Red hood guy had abs for days…
This unforeseen event sobered you up quite a bit, but the two shots you just took kinda brought you back to the same state than you were before.
Well. Not quite. You were drunk as hell again, but seemed to have avoided the “sad phase”. Instead, Red Hood bursting quite literally through your window took you to another road. 
The : “Cool, I got a drinking buddy phase”. Well, taking for granted he didn’t have any internal bleeding and wouldn’t die while biting into a lemon wedge. 
“Tough day ?” 
You ask him, as he slowly sits up and shakes his head, trying to regain his senses. He looks towards you and seem surprised (or at least you think he is, because he wears a mask so…kinda hard to tell). 
************
Jason definitely thought he was alone in this place, because no sane person would just sit there, not saying anything, as someone simply jumped through their window. Nope, most people would just freak out. Scream. 
He knows, because it’s not the first time he falls through a window during a night on duty. And every single time it happened, people freaked out. Screamed. Threw stuffs at him, or hid away begging for their life to be spared. 
And yet here you were, half a bottle of tequila in front of you, surrounded by lemon wedges you bit into, and table salt all over your hand, just staring at him curiously. And did you just say : “tough day” ?  
Well, Jason guessed the empty half of the bottle was why you were so chilled about it all. He sat up, and slowly got back to his feet. 
Usually, going through a window meant the end of the night for him. He’d go back to one of his secret stash, patch himself up and get some rest. Most of the time, he fell through windows because someone pushed him or threw him there…Though today, he just embarrassingly missed a step and fell by himself. 
Of course, no one would ever now he tripped while jumping from one building to another (you lived on the last floor) and went careening into your home (and life). Nope, the official story would be that he fought a fierce enemy and was thrown into that window. Finding fake villains name was easy, given how truly ridiculous some could be. 
Tim and Damian were still after the “Illusive Blue Man” that he totally made up that one time he walked into a poll and had a huge black eye that he couldn’t quite explain…Oh man, he had to stop telling such elaborate lies and just say “I fought with a few guys last night” without more explanation. 
But he couldn’t help it. And those kids believed everything he said, it was too tempting…But for now, this wasn’t the issue. Nope. 
He did a quick check of his body and knew he wasn’t really hurt (thanks “dad” for the amazing body armor ugh ?), so he was planning on leaving that poor girl’s house and send a mystery check in the mail to pay for the damage (money stolen from a certain Bruce Wayne of course, as if he would pay himself). 
Yup. He was just gonna stand up, and go on his way and…somehow, he found himself sitting on the stool opposite side of this mysterious girl, and now she was peppering salt on his hand ? 
“Salt”, she says, and she has a cute drunk voice. Jason almost forgets he just went through a window a few minutes ago. 
“Tequila”, she continues, downing her drink and pointing at the one she poured him. He doesn’t even care the she poured it in a cereal bowl that she didn’t even seem to have clean…He drunk worst things in worst recipient. He turns away to take off his mask and so that she can’t see his face, and “bottom’s up”. 
“Lemon !” she finishes, biting into the sour fruit and spitting it in the direction of the trashcan but missing completely. The lemon wedge goes to lost itself amongst his fallen brothers…
Jason bites into his own lemons, and spits it. Right into the garbage. 
There’s a slight pause, where she just stares at the trashcan, and then at Jason, back to the trashcan, and then turns to him again and simply says : 
“Wow.” 
************
So. This was surreal. 
Here you were. In your home. Taking tequila shots. With…Red Hood. 
One of Gotham’s night vigilante. The most violent one. But the dude seemed chilled. He was holding his liquor really well. 
And now you were talking about your broken heart, telling him the story as if he’d been your friend for years. And he was listening. Intently. And reacting to what you were saying. It had been a LONG time, since you had this kind of talk with anyone, and despite the fact you were drunk, you still noticed how nice it felt to have someone to talk to. Someone that genuinely listened. 
“And then he slept with her !” you say angrily. 
“Nooooooo !?!” 
“Yes, he did ! He slept with…with…what was her name…”
“Nicole. From accounting.” 
“Right, Nicole from accounting ! That bitch ! She always just…counts and shit ! And he slept with her ! Nicole from accounting ! Whom he met thanks to me, by the way ! At a partyyyy !! At my wooooork !!” 
“What an ass.” 
“Right ?! Oh but he had such a good ass though…Quite firm. But whenever he wore jeans, it was super flat.” 
“So, not such a good ass in the end then ?” 
“I guess not. You have a good ass. Popping right out in this outfit of yours.” 
Red Hood chuckles, and the sound of his laughter makes you forget that you just said something incredibly embarrassing. His voice is…nice. Deep. Manly. You like it. You wanna make him chuckle some more, so you say, hoping : 
“And it looks very firm. Not just quite firm.” 
It works. He snorts and it’s very cute. Oh wow. He can be sexy and cute. Full package. You smile a bit dreamily. 
For a second, he’s lost in that smile of yours, and there’s a silence installing itself in the room. A comfortable one. That you break : 
“Ok. So now, he’s not that perfect anymore ! He got no ass ! Penalty points ! I never notice how un-assed he was before…” 
Jason smiles and damn. He’s hot. 
Somewhere along the way, he stopped turning his face away from you whenever he took a shot, and just ended up taking his helmet off. He was probably hoping that you’d black out or something, so you wouldn’t remember his face (or he just didn’t care). 
In any case, you were pretty sure you never saw him before. His face kinda reminded you of an old memory. Of someone you saw somewhere long ago, when you were a kid…Which wasn’t really a big help right ? 
Right. You had no idea who he was. And in your drunken state, probably couldn’t piece anything together anyway. So even if you did know who he could be, you wouldn’t know in the end anyway…Makes perfect sense right ?
What you knew was : he’s hot. 
This white streak in his hair did something to you that you couldn’t explain. And that jawline ? You would love to get cut on that bitch.  It could actually cut a bitch, you were sure of it. Those blue eyes ? You’ve never seen someone with such blue eyes. And did you mention to yourself how muscular he was ? Because man you only saw guys like this in magazines ! 
But beyond his handsome features, he seemed like a nice guy. Like he was listening to you, a total stranger. And this realization suddenly raised your guard up. 
You also thought that your ex-cheating-boyfriend was a nice guy. And come to think of it, who the hell just barge in someone’s home like that, and actually stay to drink tequila shots ?! Wait but…in your guts…it’s not like with your ex. 
You don’t think he’s a nice guy. You know he is. 
************
There’s a visible shift in your mood, after this realization. So far, you talked to him about your broken heart freely, and he listened. 
Oddly enough, no words that came out of your (perfect) mouth bored him. Jason wasn’t sure wether it was the alcohol or not, but you captivated him. 
But in a split second, and without him knowing why, your features changed. You were now frowning. Like an unhappy little kid. It was kinda cute, but he didn’t like it because…why were you frowning ? 
He tries to lighten up the mood and says : 
“Well here you go. See, you didn’t loose the perfect guy, his ass was flat in jeans. Can’t work with that, can you ? I bet we can find other flaws. Make you realize he actually was a looser.”  
Your guard is up, but you can’t help but smile a bit, plus you were frowning just now because you realized you just knew you could trust that total stranger, and it was so weird…. 
Besides, no harm in indulging this, because you’re pretty sure it’ll make you feel better to try and see the bad side of your ex-boyfriend, not just his good ones. No one was perfect. And so, still a bit careful, you say : 
“Well…He never got any of my Tv shows or movie references.” 
“Well, here’s a point to take off of his “perfectness”. Doesn’t get pop culture references. Deal breaker.” 
“Yeah…Yeah you’re right. It is. He also used to hate when I made jokes. I like puns ya know ? Terrible ones. Well, he was always embarrassed whenever I made them in public.” 
“Ashamed of his girlfriend, doesn’t sound very gentlemanly, right ?” 
“Yeah. It doesn’t. Maybe he wasn’t such a perfect gentleman…He also used to not want to go out with me if I didn’t wear any make-up and was dressed just casually.” 
“What you mean, he never just went out with you ?” 
“We only went out on dates. I had to dress up. I could be casual home though…” 
“Well goodie, the man let you be yourself when you were home. Big deal. To be honest, sounds like a douchey move.” 
“That was kinda douchey…I never cared what he looked like.” 
And it’s true. For you, physical appearance wasn’t everything. And sure you thought your ex was hot and all, but only because you liked his personality too. You liked his jokes, you were never ashamed of anything he said. 
And right now, sure that stranger that bursted through your window was hot, but the reason you felt like you could tell him things was because he just made you comfortable by his mere aura. Because he gave you such a good vibe. 
You never were fully about appearances. It was always just a bonus for you…So it never occurred to you why your ex would only hang out in public with you if you were pampered. Like he used to hate when you just wore hoodies and no make-up, even if you didn’t need make-up to be beautiful. 
Comes to think of it, he was very much about appearances…Uh. Interesting. You never realized that before. 
You turn to Red Hood, and the look on your face says it all. You’re slowly realizing maybe you didn’t just lost “the one”. The vigilante says : 
“Ok, so : no ass, no humor apparently, doesn’t get pop culture references, and was kind of a jerk when it came to going out with you…” 
“He did tell me often that I was beautiful though. Including when I just woke up from a night out, and was awful looking.”
“Yeah, but he never went out with you looking like that. He shouldn’t feel ashamed of hanging out with you looking like that. Just like he shouldn’t feel embarrassed when you joke. He can be exasperated, like if you really make bad puns, sure. And he can think it’s unfunny…But embarrassed ? No.” 
“I guess…I never thought about it.” 
“Well let me tell you, as someone who does not know neither you nor him personally, he sounds like a bit of a jerk. Let’s not forget he cheated as well. Like, that’s not something good people do. Especially not with…Nicole from accounting.” 
“Nicole from accounting…Yeah. They’re together now though.” 
“So ? He should’ve broken up with you if he realized he liked her. That’s the right thing to do. Trust me on that, I put villains behind bars for a living, I know what’s right or wrong.” 
“I heard you kill criminals.” 
“Used to. I used to kill criminals, I had issues. I’ll tell you one day if you wanna. It’s a real tear jerker story. With clowns and crowbars. And I’m telling you that because I’m drunk, right now. Also, if we want to be specific, I don’t actually make a living out of putting villains behind bars. Like, I don’t get paid or anything…” 
Jason finds himself ranting about anything that comes to his mind, and though he hears himself claim it’s because of the alcohol he’s saying all this, he realizes maybe there’s something else making him want to talk. 
You. A total stranger he walked upon. Or rather, went-through-the-window upon.  Who didn’t freak out when he went through said window. And instead, invited him over to have tequila shots. 
Because, according to your grandmother, the best remedy to…basically any problems in life, was “salt, tequila, lemon”. 
“She was a wise woman.” 
He says, and you turn to him, clearly not understanding what he was talking about. 
“Who ?” 
“Your grandma. For saying that salt, tequila and lemon was a great remedy against heartbreaks and all.” 
“Oh. Yeah. I wouldn’t know, I never met her. She died before I was born.” 
“Well what she passed on to your parents is great.” 
“What ?”
“Well, that “salt, tequila and lemon” thing, I assume she said that to your mom or dad, and then they said that to you, and then it became your grandma’s advice. Right ?” 
“…Nah. It’s an excuse I made up. Whenever I need to justify something, I just say “like my grandma said, ain’t no shame in eating an entire tub of ice cream if you want to”, and then people are just like “oh yeah, cool”, because when you say the word “grandma”, then it gives a perspective to your words ya know ?” 
Jason had no idea what you were on about, but he loved it. You seemed to be very smart. And witty. And funny. The hell did that guy cheated on you for ? And why was he ashamed of going out in public with you when you weren’t dressed up ?! 
You currently wore “Hello Kitty” pyjamas, had absolutely no make up on, and your hair was a mess, and he thought you looked gorgeous.
“Why are you so nice ?” 
Your question takes him by surprise, and for a few seconds he doesn’t register it and just says : “ugh ?” 
“To me. Why are you so nice to me ? Is it the alcohol ? Does it make you nice ? Or are you just nice to every stranger ? Every girl you destroy the windows of ? Or are you like my ex ? You seem nice, but then you go off and cheat on your girl simply because you like another girl and you’re too cowardly to break up with your current girl ?” 
Jason hiccups slightly, and says : 
“No, I’m not nice to any girl I met. I’m actually usually kind of a jerk, too “brutally honest”. But you…I don’t know. You give me good feelings. Oh and here’s to add on his flaws list. “Coward”. Can’t even break up with a girl, has to wait to get caught red-handed and break her heart. Cooooward. Bad flaw. Kind of guy who runs in the face of danger, instead of standing by you.” 
It’s probably the fact that he said “you give me good feelings” that spurs this in you. That gives you a new clearer perspective on things. 
“My heart wasn’t broken.”
It’s a shock, to you. This realization. This sudden feeling jumping in your face. You…are not heartbroken. You’re mad. You’re frustrated. You feel betrayed. You feel a crazy burning anger towards your ex for toying around with you like that. For not having the balls to just break up, after spending two years together. 
He was suppose to know you. To be your friend. Things could have turned out better. He could have just come up to you, say the truth, and…You were pretty sure you’d still be friend. Because he really was a great guy. 
He really was all the good thing you though about him. He made a mistake, an unforgivable one in your book. But he was a great guy. 
He was just…not your great guy. Not anymore at least. 
And you realized, there, quite drunk, that…It was ok.  
Your heart wasn’t broken.  
Your heart wasn’t broken. 
Your pride was. Your trust was. But your heart ? …Maybe you weren’t completely in love with him. You were best friends, yes, but love ? Maybe it wasn’t love…
Your heart wasn’t broken. 
“My heart isn’t broken.” 
You tell Red hood, looking at him right in his wonderful ocean blue eyes. And he looks right back at you, and just nods. Just like that. And then he pours you one last tequila shot. 
Because like your grandma would say : “When you make great discovery about yourself…Salt, tequila, lemon”. 
************
It took you only a few hours with him to realize that you weren’t in love with your ex, and that was kinda scary. Because this realization didn’t come from nowhere. 
Nope. 
But when he said that your ex broke your heart, you felt obligated to tell him that no. No your heart wasn’t broken. You were sad and angry, yes, but not heartbroken. For you, in that moment, it was important for this total stranger to know you weren’t actually in love. 
Hell, you didn’t even know yourself you weren’t that in love before you talked to him. It just came as a sudden, yet utterly true revelation. 
Because, and this wasn’t the alcohol speaking…You felt incredibly attracted to that guy. To Red Hood. Not just because of the white streak in his hair, and the eyes, and smile, and voice, and abs, and thick thighs. That too, sure, but not only…Nope. 
Nope. Not because of this. 
But because he had a tough day (he said so himself, explaining to you how he went through the window…he was fighting a super-villain when he got flung through your window, tough tough time ahem), and yet he sat with a crazy lady that peppered salt on his hand and practically forced him to take a tequila shot…
Because you could see in his eyes, and felt in your guts that he didn’t have an easy life…and yet he took a break from whatever he was doing to just sit with you and listen to you. He didn’t even make sense, that you trusted those feelings so fiercely. And yet, you did. Because he listened to you. 
He saw you were struggling and he stayed. And though you felt you couldn’t trust anyone at that time…You oddly felt like he was ok. 
Like he wouldn’t be the kind of guy to cheat, or run in the face of danger, leaving you all alone to fight off demons. 
In a few short hours, you fell for this guy more than you ever fell for your ex. 
What did that say about you uh ? …That was pretty pathetic…
************
Jason didn’t think that you were pathetic at all. 
On the contrary. If he went to seat with you, and drink with you, is because he was instantly mesmerized by you. 
And though he didn’t know at first why, now he was sure of it. 
It’s because you didn’t freak out. And something told him it wasn’t only because you were a bit drunk (he fell in drunk people’s home before…none reacted like you). 
Nope. It was because you were special. He just knew it. Special in every way. Funny. Beautiful. Genuinely listening to him when he was speaking. 
He peppered his own problems within your story, as you told him. And you listened. Hell, even referenced a few things he said early on, way later, while you were crazy drunk. You listened. 
You gave a total stranger that seemed to have a tough day some salt. And tequila. And lemons. 
And then you cared. You asked him a thousand times if he was ok, and he basically had to take off his armor to prove it so (to your eyes’ greatest pleasure…mm mm mm those muscles). 
Captivated. He was captivated by you. It was strange, and though he knew it was because you were special, he still was unclear as to why his feelings were that strong. 
For someone he just met. And barely knew. And only knew while drunk. 
You were just…Special. 
************
It was surreal. The all thing. 
What started as a night where you planned on wallowing your pain and drinking…ended up changing your life. 
And no one could convince you that it wasn’t Fate. Because what were the odds that Red Hood would fall through YOUR window after tripping (yeah you didn’t buy that “fighting super-villains thing” at all) ?
What were the odds of his timing being so perfect, arriving just before you started to cry ? Because there was no doubt in your mind that if he had come a few seconds later, he wouldn’t have stayed. 
He would have found a crying mess, and maybe he would have tried to confort you but…You wouldn’t have answered. In your “sad phase”, you only cry and whine. He would have eventually left. And the wonderful talk you’d just have, would never have happened. 
But instead. He came right before your lips touch that fatal shot of tequila that would have brought you into the “sad phase”. And took your drunkness down a notch. Rerouted your evening. 
You weren’t wallowing anymore, you were ranting. 
Sharing your anger and frustration. 
And he helped you realize that your ex wasn’t that perfect…That maybe it was just not meant to be…After all, he cheated on you. 
Uh. What a shame. You didn’t even know his name…”Red Hood”…
You wished you knew his name. 
************
The morning lights were rising, and the bottle of tequila was long gone. 
There were still salt and lemons though. For some reason, you decided to buy the entire grocery store’s stock of lemons. 
Red Hood stood up, and said he had to go. 
He was nice about it. Said it was a pleasure to have spend the night with you. You both laughed about the innuendos that ensued. 
You were exactly on the same page. And he understood all your joke referencing to pop culture… 
But it was time for him to go. And he apparently had no intention of telling you his real name. He didn’t hint either at ever coming back to see you again. 
And there was that. Just a nice night, spend talking to a genuine friend that you’ll never see again. 
A genuine friend that you didn’t even know a few hours before. 
Maybe it was the alcohol speaking. Maybe not. 
And even if you ended up never seeing him again, this evening truly changed your life…At least, it saved you from a heartbreak. Made you realize it wasn’t that.
Though, now, as he climbs out of the window again (he couldn’t possibly use the front door), you feel like the actual heartbreak is starting. 
Grandma’s remedy against heartbreak ? Right. 
Salt, tequila, lemon…
But the tequila is all gone. 
“I’ll send someone to fix that window…Sorry again about that. …Bye.” are his last words, and then he’s out. 
And the tequila is all gone. 
************
… 
Days pass by in a blur. 
Salt. Tequila. Lemon. 
Ugh. But you don’t want to this time. You don’t want to get drunk to forget. 
You don’t want to forget him. And you know it’s ridiculous to get that worked up over a guy you met one night and that will never come back. That you didn’t even know the name of. 
This entire night was weird anyway. 
Getting drunk with a dangerous night vigilante. Pouring your heart out to him, and him doing the same. The hell were you even thinking ? 
Salt. Tequila. Lemon. 
That would be a good idea to do this right now, because man…your heart hurt. More than when you discovered your ex sleeping with Nicole. From accounting. But you can’t resolve yourself to drink. To forget. Nope. Instead you…
*Knock knock knock*. 
Uh ? You take a quick look at your clock in the kitchen.10 pm. Who the hell is coming at 10 pm ?! It can only be bad news. Especially in Gotham…You peep into the eyehole and…
WHAT ?! 
You open your door quickly, and… 
“Told you I’d send someone to fix your window.” 
It’s him. It’s Red hood. But in…civilian clothes. 
His ass doesn’t look flat in jeans. 
He’s holding a window wrapped in cardboard, and there’s a toolbox at his feet. 
“Yeah, you did…come in.” 
************
Jason Todd. 
That’s his name. And connections are fast to be made in your brain. Jason Todd. Bruce Wayne’s adopted son. That supposedly died…ten years ago. 
And is Red Hood now. Oh. It makes sense. Even his little “killing criminals” thing while Batman never killed. You easily put two and two together. 
Red Hood. Jason Todd. Bruce Wayne. 
Wow. Can’t believe you never guessed that before. Of course Bruce Wayne is Batman. He’s got the motive, the means, the excuses…It’s so obvious. And yet, you never realized. And no one else in Gotham ever realized. 
Jason Todd. 
Now you know his name. 
And he’s fixing your window. Nobody ever fixed windows for you before (even those who broke it).
Um. To add to the “perfect man” list : “Handy”. 
Jason Todd.  
He quickly works the window up, and then he turns to you. While he was working you talked, as if you knew each other for years. Joking around. Like old friends. Like old extremely good and close friends. 
It fits. It clicks. It’s natural. You and him, him and you. 
Barely knowing each others, and yet knowing each others the best. 
Jason. Todd. 
He turns to you now, and with a smirk, he says : 
“Ya know, my grandma always say that when something good happens to you, you need to celebrate. And I feel like this, right now, you and I, though I have no idea what we’re doing and where it’s going…Well it’s still something to celebrate. And she always says, my grandma, that to celebrate perfectly you need…” 
You smile. 
Yeah. You don’t know where this thing between you two is going, but you do know that you never met someone who so fully understood you. 
And in such a short span of time. And you know you’re not mistaking. It’s a feeling too strong to be a mistake. 
He came back to fix your window for god’s sake. And trusted you enough to tell you his actual name. Without a second thought. Which meant everything. Especially since from all the hint he let slip through last time you saw each others, about his father, well…let’s just say telling people his real name wasn’t really something he was used to. 
But it just works. It fits. It clicks. It’s not like with your ex, because you don’t think you know it does. It just does. The fact that you say those next few words in perfect sync finishes to convince you : 
(“…And she always says, my grandma, that to celebrate perfectly you need…”) 
“Salt, tequila, and lemons.” 
______________________________________________
I’m so mad the Tumblr app crashed and I deleted the original post...Y’all were great and reblogged the hell out of it ! Which is why it got so many notes in such a short span of times. And feedbacks. I haven’t had that many feedbacks on a story in a long time. So just one last time and I won’t bother you with that again : Please, if you enjoyed this story, don’t hesitate to reblog it and share it with others. People who don’t follow me can’t really find my stories anymore so...you’re a big help by spreading them. It’s always very encouraging. 
And if you got the time, feedbacks are always hella appreciated and always make my day a little brighter <3. 
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kimjichim · 5 years
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Expectations | 01
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Summary: One night out is all you need to get your heart snatched. You can call him a friend, a fuckbuddy or the guy you’re currently seeing. The label doesn’t matter. That’s what you both agreed on and you’re okay with that; until you realised you weren’t.
Genre: College! AU, fluff???  idk sis but soon to be hella fluff n later angst n meybe smutty idk (just letting yall know)
Pairing: Taehyung x Reader
Word Count: 1,334 (hella short srry)
Warnings: none atm apart from swearing~~
A/N: hi bitches im back after 3 years mwahahaaaa. honestly, idk if any of yall even remember me but like this time round i actually wanna properly start writing more (esp cos its gonna help with my HSC) and ill have a lot more time from now on cos im graduating hs soon!!!! this story is lowkey based on smth that happened to me a few months ago but obvs with tweaks here n there. my writing is hella rusty so sorry if it’s dry. its not really a full chapter but i really wanted to release it before i throw it away like always yeet. i promise to release the next one soon~~~. if yall got any feedback, it would be much appreciated TTTT would you like a 3-4 chapter piece? or a slow burn series? lemme knowww cos i havent fully thought about what i wanna do with this story yet. hope yall like the intro thoughjgghg <3 <3
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You’re still not used to it. The loud music blasting into your ear from every corner of the street and the hoards of people that walk past. It’s a Friday night and you wanna let loose this holidays, especially since you just recently turned the legal age. You’re just as excited and nervous as the first time you’ve ever walked into a bar. The nagging thought of the bouncers not letting you in persists at the back of your mind. You present your ID and give them a small smile, all the while fidgeting with your fingers behind you. However, your worries are immediately washed away as they smile back and step aside to let you in. 
You walk in with Jinhee, one of your good friends who invited you out tonight to get you into the clubbing scene. Initially, you agreed in excitement and was looking forward to tonight for the whole week. But now that you’re here, you’re not so hyped anymore, especially now that you realise you have to introduce yourself to Jinhee’s friends. Meeting new people? While you’re sober? Nope, no thanks. 
Regardless, you stick closely behind Jinhee as she struts over to the bar and orders a few drinks while you scan the area, appreciating the chill vibe in the bar. People are generally huddled in their groups all erupting in laughter and talks. The girls look stunning in their outfits and the guys look clean and fit.
“Y/N. Here,” You turn your head to Jinhee while she hands you two drinks, “Gin and tonic. That’s your favourite, right?” 
You smirk and nod before you notice another two drinks in her hands. Why do we have so ma- 
“We’re starting off strong tonight, I want to be wasted when we get into the club.” She smirks. 
You scoff in disbelief, “You mean to say that these two will be all you need tonight, right? Lightweight.”
“Oh, shut up.” she retorts, “Come on, my friends are sitting on the other side.”
You follow her without a word and mentally prepare yourself for all the names you’re gonna have to remember for the night. Thankfully, the drinks kicked in faster than it usually did, allowing your social skills to skyrocket. The girls were all so nice and looked amazing in their outfits and the guys were really sweet as well. So many different conversations filled the circle and it was absolutely chaotic, but you didn’t mind it for some reason. 
“Hey guys, we should head to the other bar in the next block for another round. Heard it was really nice there.” One of the guys shouted. Taejun, was it?
“You really want to see those dancers, huh?” one shouted back, throwing his arm over his shoulders, instantly going for the choke-hold, “Taehyung, you horny motherfucker.” Oh fuck, wrong name. I must be drunk.
You pay no mind to it as the need to freshen yourself suddenly overcomes you as you stand from the stool. You decide to sober up a bit before you leave and grab onto Jinhee while everyone starts heading off.
“Jinhee, I’ll be in the bathroom. Wait for me before we leave, okay?” You ask.
She throws the okay sign while stumbling towards the entrance to catch up to everyone else.
“That bitch better not ditch me like last time.” You mumble to yourself, doubtful of Jinhee due to her intolerance to alcohol. 
Well, at least I’m having a good time. I haven’t had this much fun in awhile. You’re glad you came out and met some new people; you could really use some time to lighten yourself up from all that torture in the last semester. 
You step out of the bar, expecting Jinhee to jump out at you, nagging you for being too slow but she’s nowhere to be seen. You sigh in disappointment. Figured. You pull out your phone to call Jinhee but is stopped by a sudden invasion of personal space.
“Y/N, right? Let’s go, Jinhee said that everyone will be waiting at the next place.”
You look up at his face in confusion before you realise that he was one of Jinhee’s friends. 
“Oh shit, uhh, Taehyuk, right?” You ask while stumbling. Jesus, my tolerance must’ve gotten lower too, I can’t think straight.
“Hahaha, close. My name is Taehyung. Good try though.” He snickers.
Motherfu- 
“God dammit, I’m so sorry. I’m really bad with names,” You stammer, “especially when I’m drunk.”
“Don’t sweat it,” he smiles, “We’re all like that when we’re a bit tipsy.”
Wow, cute smile.
“We should probably start heading over to where everyone else is.”
You nod in approval and begin walking through the busy streets. The two of you maintain a good conversation along the way, getting to know each other and finding similar interests. Throughout the ten minute walk. You couldn’t get over how good looking this guy was. His sharp, dark eyes were so mesmerising. There was a cute mole on his tall nose and his lips were of a pretty pink. Not to mention his freaking hair. It looked like black silk shining against the lights. It was luscious and so soft-looking. I would do anything to run my hand through his hair right now. 
Unfortunately, your alone time with Taehyung came to an end as you finally met up with the rest of the group. You see Jinhee with her two bottles of soju, giving you the dirtiest look while being barely able to stand. You immediately walk over to her without much thought or any more exchange with Taehyung, feeling slightly embarrassed.
“This is for me, I assume?” You say with a glare, snatching the bottle out of her hand.
She ignores you and looks over your shoulder at Taehyung, which your eyes naturally follow.
“Already getting a hot one, huh?” She snickers.
“This wouldn’t have happened if you didn’t ditch me in the first place.” You grumble back.
“Your welcome.”
You sigh once again while downing a bit of the soju you stole from Jinhee and occasionally glance over to Taehyung. You two make eye contact from time to time and give a friendly smile but you don’t push for more. That small ten minute conversation was enough for you to constantly sneak glances at him. You’re not complaining though, he is really pleasing to look at. You feel like a child staring at a really expensive toy at the display window.
The night slowly moves on as you meet more and more people, all the while involuntarily having your eyes drawn to Taehyung, wherever he is; as if you have a radar on him this whole time. However, you don’t dwell on him for much longer than two seconds, allowing yourself to fully enjoy your night with your newly found friends.
The night was finally about to get started when Taehyung caught you glancing over at him once again. Reflexively, you smile but he doesn’t return the smile like he usually does. It throws you off guard and you freeze in shock before quickly turning your head back to the current conversation. You can feel your face and ears getting rapidly warmer. Shortly after, you feel a presence behind you and hear a deep voice call out your name.
“Y/N?” It’s Taehyung. You turn around. “We’re heading off to the club now, you wanna join us?”
“Uhh-” You immediately look towards Jinhee to ask if everyone was ready to leave before you get cut off by her loud voice.
“C’mon everyone! It’s time to hit the club, let’s go!!” Jinhee exclains to group while shuffling everyone towards the exit and gives you a small wink. That sly fox. You think in amusement.
“Alright, shall we head?” Taehyung asks while he cocks his head to the side.
You simply nod and follow him. Maybe it’s because of the alcohol in your system but you can’t seem to control your excitement at the possible opportunities that could follow tonight.
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Magnus and Queen
ok so i thought making the other post would get this off my chest but apparently it didnt so here comes
this post is non-queen-fans friendly
lemme just talk a little bit more about magnus' (Canon!!!!) relationship with freddie mercury cuz honestly i think they were just name-dropping but it makes so much sense i die
listen. LISTEN. magnus and freddie are so alike, its kind of unreal. both really powerful/glamorous/outspoken people who actually felt pretty lonely and were very closed off when it came to important things.
both with the same fashion style and love to break gender roles (particularly 70s!Freddie).
both big cat lovers.
both really Soft and romantic and nice but taken for divas and drama queens because of their effeminate styles.
both serial adopters of insecure kids (John deacon, queens bassist, has said multiple times that fred was like a father figure to him, helped him come out of his shell and feel comfortable in the band and always helped him write his songs. also most of freddie's exes or queer friends ended up living at his house or getting a position as like, freddie's "personal assistant" or "gardener" so he could help them on their feet - and magnus, well, magnus has adopted every single downworlder he managed to put his hands on).
both diplomatic peacemakers (all the queen guys have said on multiple occasions that when things got heated, freddie helped them figure out their differences and played the diplomat) but who also didnt stand for bullshit.
both had an "open house" policy (freddie would accept visitors any day and frequently took random people he met on clubs to his home. that's how he met his husband, jim hutton)
both really creative, admired, fierce people. both scared of being left behind and unloved. both queer men of color.
like listen theres just. so much they could bond over. so much they could share with each other. i bet their relationship was so good for the both of them
with all of that being said, i dont think they were like, boyfriends. theres many reasons for that; 1- magnus would have to hide pretty much his entire life from freddie; 2- i think magnus would at least avoid getting involved with a mundane; 3- magnus spent way too many years closed off to romantic relationships; 4- they were both kinda private when it came to The Important Things so i think that would put a wall between them should they try to have a romantic relationship
so I'm thinking - not dating, but not really friends with benefits either? something like friends-who-sometimes-bang-and-sometimes-sit-in-silence-doing-their-thing-and-sometimes-talk-all-night-long. intimate and close, but not really romantic. and they were fine with that
freddie and magnus would lowkey compete over who loved cats the most. it was never really explicitly said but whenever magnus would, like, get a cat some milk, freddie would give them fish, so magnus would pet them, so freddie would kiss them, and it kept going but neither would acknowledge what was happening
magnus had to have met the other queen members at some point, since they were all really close (like, personal-space-is-not-a-thing close, really, there are many pictures of them all just. sitting on each other's laps), and i think hed vibe with Brian May (queens guitarrist) pretty well
im thinking party because freddie loved to throw parties and magnus loved himself a good party and somehow he bumps on Brian and theyre both slightly tipsy and started talking and like. brian is fun (esp when hes drunk) so theyd get along well and somehow they found themselves at a quieter place just talking. im thinking by the pool just because brian would throw himself at the pool at freddie's parties jejdid
anyway they have a few bits in common if you look close enough. mainly, brians gender issues (his parents kind of raised him as a girl and hes always been like, slightly feminine. up to this day - hes 71 now - brian paints his nails and has long curly hair and wears androgynous clothing on his shows) and death issues (brian had a sister who died very young and it deeply scarred him. he has many songs that revolve around the idea of being the one who lives and having to watch your loved ones die. hes also struggled with depression and suicidal ideation for pretty much his whole life)
so like, ok, yeah, dark, but im not really thinking, super dark? im thinking somehow these topics come up and it ends up being like one of these honest conversations you have with strangers at a party when you're just the right amount of tipsy to be honest without being hyper-emotional or a crying mess. these conversations that end up going deep but dont really feel sad, feel more like "omg someone understands!" and end up being kind of fun
so they talk about these issues and get along pretty well and both come out of their conversation pretty satisfied. magnus didnt reveal anything he shouldn't, of course, but that conversation ended up subconsciously inspiring brian to write who wants to live forever
magnus kind of doesnt listen to who wants to live forever cuz it hits a little too close to home. but its a beautiful song
eventually, with magnus becoming the high warlock of brooklyn and freddie dating other people, they stop seeing each other. they dont really break up as much as drift apart, and, as many of freddie's exes, stay on pretty amicable terms
magnus never stops being a queen fan. hed still go to concerts, along with dot, and sometimes talk to the guys when he managed
magnus was totally that queen fan who liked the hot space album, and dot was totally that queen fan who despised the hot space album. these were the concerts that magnus "dragged" dot to (because i refuse to believe dot doesnt like queen. theres no such thing). theyd have heated arguments over it too
"its funk! its disco! its not queen" "oh, so you're telling me that queen, the band that mixed hard rock and opera, should stick to a single musical genre?" "im saying it doesnt have queens touch. i thought youd back me up on this, dont you think there could be more of an edge?" "darling, there can always be more of an edge. also, two words: under pressure." and even dot cant argue with the power of under pressure, but that doesn't mean she'll agree with him
queen is magnus' go-to band for many moods. they just have so many songs he can relate to (from dont try suicide to somebody to love) and also many purely fun, even silly songs he can dance/perform to and just feel. happy. he even likes most of queens not as well-known songs, like seaside rendezvous and lazing on a sunday afternoon
freddie's death shocked him. freddie didnt tell the press about his disease and they werent that close anymore at the time, so it hit him in the stomach. he attended the freddie mercury tribute concert and went back home feeling better and knowing that freddie lived a happy life
when he starts to miss him and wants to honour him, he listens to was it all worth it, to remind himself that yes, Freddie died really happy and proud of his life
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