#incorrect avery

[astraeajackson]

xander: hi, i'm xander! short for alexander

xander: this is gray, short for grayson

xander: this is jamie, short for jameson

xander: and this is nash... he's just short :)

nash: for the LAST TIME-

[drowningtheyougestblack]

#Remus commentating quidditch

"Hello everyone. Welcome to the 4th match of the season. Griffindor vs slytherin."

"Alright the match is starting. Players are in position. And WE'RE ON"

"Chaser Mary MacDonald almost got hit by a bludger launched at her. Honesty, what the fuck are griffindor beaters doing? That's like their only job." Everyone can hear sirius' fuck you on that.

"Oo, griffindor seeker has spotted the snitch. She's going for it. She's going to get it. And.. she's a lump on the ground. Honestly McKinnon, you can see the bloody snitch from half way through the pitch but you can't see the ground in front of your FUCKING FACE"

"god that must've hurt. YOU FUCKING DESERVE IT AVERY-"

"Any ways back to the game. Where is that fucking quaffle".

"Seems like james potter has finally took a break from swooning over slytherin seeker black and is speeding towards the goals with the quaffle."

"Let's see if slytherin keeper dolohov has the skill to block the goal or if he's just a useless dick".

"AND TEN POINTS TO GRIFFINDOR. That just proves that dolohov *is* a useless dick"

"McKinnon spots the snitch again. Black would've too if he wasn't so busy staring at james thighs. Like man we know how good they are, but FOCUS ON THE FUCKING GAME. Honestly you both are pathetic".

"REGULUS BLACK HAS CAUGHT THE SNITCH, 150 POINTS TO SLYTHERIN."

"slytherin wins, yay I guess. Looks like he took those words personally.

"Anyways griffindor lost, that's gotta suck".

[remusfinglupin]

Avery: The moon looks beautiful, doesn’t it?

Max, looking at Avery: Yeah… but do you know what’s more beautiful?

Avery and Max in unison: *sighs* Tristan

[lanterns-and-daydreams]

Reporter, to Libby: So, how does it feel to be marrying someone so out of your league?

Libby: Well-

Nash, cutting her off: Feels amazin', darlin', thanks

[freakygirlie]

Merlin: I have magic

Arthur: This is going to ruin the tour

Merlin: ???

Arthur: The world tour

[stargirl0479]

page 45 of final gambit rewritten:

avery: tahiti

jameson: im sad because my ex died on your birthday and i tried not to think of her but i did so can you make me feel better about letting her die?

avery: yeah it wasn’t your fault

jameson: great but you aren’t jealous of my brother standing next to eve, right?

avery: of course not

jameson:

jameson: tahiti

avery: first of all, fuck you, second of all-

[odysseynabrielise]

Avery: Why do you have to be so tall anyway? Tristan: Would you prefer me on my knees? Max: I don’t think there's an HR appropriate answer for that.

[maxdibert]

Do more canon-compliant Marauders incorrect quotes, I beg you

Barty: Uh mate the Gryffindors are making a scene again.

Regulus: Is there ever a time when they’re not?

Avery: It’s about what Mulciber did to that mudblood McDonald the other day.

Barty: Who’s McDonald?

Regulus: I think she’s in Snape’s year.

Severus *lifting his head from his book*: It’s a brand of cheap Muggle hamburgers.

[alexandriastark76]

Totally thinking that Sev would have the hots for Monty

[acebirdofprey]

Massey: How was the honeymoon? Max: Tristan got drunk and tried to throw our marriage certificate into a bonfire. He said, “good luck trying to return us without a receipt”. Avery: God, I love him.

[unnoodles]

The Inheritance games incorrect quotes because I can

Grayson : Stop setting things on fire because you're curious about what will happen. What will happen is fire.

Xander : But what if something else happens just this one time.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Nash: How are you today?

Grayson: Please don’t make me think about my life.

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Jameson: Am I going to far?

Grayson: No, no, no. You went too far about 7 hours ago. Now you’re going to prison.

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Xander: Just took a personality test and got an A+.

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Grayson: Don’t worry, I have a permit.

Jameson: ...This just says “I can do what I want”.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Jameson: Avery is playing hard to get.

Jameson: Little do they know, I'm a master at playing hard to get rid of.

[mafiasliege]

Avery: I identify as morosexual. I'm attracted to dumbasses and dumbasses alone.

Jameson: I jumped off of a balcony without a shirt in winter after getting super drunk.

Avery, taking off his shirt: You're so fucking stupid.

(should i make these for others?)

[a-v-j]

[your-mommy-ems]

Xander, throwing his head in Avery's lap: Tell me I'm pretty.

Avery, lovingly stroking their hair: You're pretty fucking annoying, thats what you are.

[remusfinglupin]

Tristan, looking through his clothes: Has anyone seen my top?

Avery: Max is in the kitchen.

[astraeajackson]

mallory laughlin: i love all my children equally! emily, toby, and-

mallory laughlin: *squints*

mallory laughlin: rebonka