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#incorrect bad batch
tattycoram · 4 months
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Hunter: Tech, hack into their cameras Tech: Oh sure, let me just load my 'tap into every security camera in the city' app Tech: *taps the screen* Tech: I'm sorry if that sounded like sarcasm. It wasn't, I am in
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Hunter, Pre-Omega: [Standing on top of a tank in the middle of a battlefield while blowing air horns] GET FUCKED!
Hunter, now: "Does EVERYONE have their juice boxes?!"
Omega, now: [Standing on top of a tank in the middle of a battlefield while blowing airhorns] GET FUCKED! [Turning to the side] Yes, Hunter, I have my juice box!!
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Omega: You and Hunter are having a baby.
Y/N: I'm sorry??
Omega, slamming adoption papers on the table: It's me, sign here.
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[the batch get back to pabu after a mission and Omega notice that Crosshair is clearly not happy (sad)]
Omega, gives him a leaf:
Crosshair: What...?
Omega: I be-leaf in you.
Crosshair:
Omega:
Crosshair, with a hint of a smile: Wrecker told you to do that, didnt he?
Omega, nods:
Crosshair, letting out a chuckle: of course he did
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Crosshair: Guys, there’s a monster under my bed and it’s really ugly.
Hunter, on the bottom bunk: Honestly, fuck you.
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chopper-base · 1 year
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Crosshair: ...can I shoot him?
Hunter: Cross, we are in public
Crosshair:
Hunter:
Crosshair:
Hunter: ...wait til there's no witnesses
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Y/n: You don't think I can fight because of my gender!
Tech: I don't think you can fight because your in a wedding dress. For what it's worth, I don't think Echo can fight in that dress either.
Echo: Perhaps not. But I would make a radiant bride.
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momojedi · 11 months
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The Bad Batch as Vines, Pt. ???
Hunter: I should’ve left you on that landing platform where you were standing.
Crosshair:
Crosshair: BUT YA DIDN’T
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dangraccoon · 1 year
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And now presenting…
The Bad Batch as Chaotic Out-of-Context Quotes from My Family
Wrecker: “We need a shipload of duct tape.”
Hunter: “…a what?!”
———
Echo: “Three horsepower garbage disposal with chrome accessories.”
———
Omega: “I got it! I got it! *splash* I don’t got it.”
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Tech, about Crosshair: “Terminal velocity cat to the face.”
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Rex & Echo, S2E8, 13:50: “Everyone likes a good knee slide.”
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Wrecker: “Can I have my diet Coke and my lighter fluid please?”
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Crosshair: “I need a melon-baller; I tire of my vision.”
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Tech: “I have all social grace of an autistic bulldozer.”
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Wrecker: “Fishing. Omelets. Pancakes.”
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Hunter: “Frost in the field.”
Tech: “Frogs?”
Wrecker: “Bras on the field?”
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Echo: “The gears of capitalism are greased by the blood of the workers.”
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Tech: “Huh. This is decidedly not neat.”
Echo: “I rescind my ‘neat’.”
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Omega & Wrecker: “I don’t like chocolate chip cookies, like I don’t like breathing!”
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Omega: “I am as smart as a lobster. I am smarter than a frog.”
———
Tech: “There are legitimate cheese caves.”
Echo: “Not illegitimate caves.”
Crosshair: “Bastard caves!”
———
Let me know if you want more, we have b a c k l o g s 😂
Masterlist
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haven-is-happy · 2 years
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Echo: You ever get so tired that you start seeing spiders
Hunter: me after I take 17 painkillers and start seeing the gun man
Echo: The WHO???
Hunter: Oh so this is no longer a safe space
Tech:
Tech: Crosshair
Tech: He means Crosshair
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hannah-the-red-head · 2 years
Conversation
Hunter: 5,000,000,000!
Hannah: C’mon Hunter, please don’t make this a big deal than it already is!
Echo: Why the Kriff are you two yelling at 3 in the morning?! Omega and the others are trying to sleep!
Hunter: Your bounty is 5,000,000,000 credits, what did you do to get that high a number?!!
Echo: Excuse me, what?!
Hannah: Look, I may or may not have spray painted a rancor’s “special device” on an Imperial Star Destroyer refueling on Judari 5 before I met you guys.
Echo: I highly doubt vandalism of that kind warrants a 5,000,000,000 bounty.
Hannah: Well… the thing is… it… it was Darth Vader’s Star Destroyer.
Echo: Yep, that’ll do it.
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tattycoram · 4 months
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*Hunter minding his business in his bunk* Crosshair, loudly from the next room: If you don't shut your autistic ass up I'm going to turn on the ceiling light and make it so you have to get up to turn it off! Tech: OH WE'RE DOING HATE CRIMES NOW? Hunter: Hunter: Maybe joining the empire isn't such a bad idea after all
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Spoiler-Free Incorrect Bad Batch Quotes
Hunter: Did you check your lunch? I put a little note in your bag to tell you that I love you.
Omega, opening the bag: Hunter, this is a 10-page letter.
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Phee, unbuttoning shirt: Damn, it's so hot in here!
Tech: I get that, but why are you unbuttoning my shirt?
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Hunter: My daughter said she really wants to watch "Murder on the Polar Express" and shit now so do I.
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Wrecker: Can we go to Dex's? Shakes are 1.99 right now!
Echo: I thought you were lactose intolerant?
Wrecker: Not at that price!
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Omega: Crosshair, if you die, do you want to be buried or cremated? Like, if you were hit by a bus today, what do I do?
Crosshair: Go after the bus driver and make him pay for what he did to me. Avenge me, Omega.
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Omega: Hey, Crosshair, are you awake?
Crosshair: What?
Omega: Are you awake?
Crosshair: Who do you think said "what"?
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Echo: What is your biggest fear?
Rex: Oh, I'm incredibly arachnophobic.
Wrecker: You don't want the spiders to get married?
Rex: ......
Tech, sighing while putting his fork down: Wrecker, why-
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Crosshair: Hey, nerd!
[Echo, Tech, and Omega all turn around]
Crosshair: Oh, you all turned around? Wow.
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Tech: You are not coming with us. You're still recovering.
Y/N: What? I want to come. I'm fine, I feel great.
Tech: Really?
Y/N: Never better.
Tech: How many fingers am I holding up?
Y/N: I don't have to answer that.
Tech: How many fingers? It is a simple question for someone in a robust state of health, isn't it?
Y/N: Four.
Tech: ...Four?
Y/N: Four... ish
Tech: No, Y/N, I am not holding up four-ish fingers.
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Fives: Whats your darkest desire?
Echo: I wanna stare at someone from across the street and then disappear when a ship passes by.
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thebaddestofbatches · 2 years
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Omega: *entering the room wearing eyeliner and ripped jeans*
Hunter: Uh, good morning? Do you want something to eat?
Omega: Does it matter? There’s no point. We’re going to die soon anyway.
Hunter: Ok. This is fine. I can handle another emo phase.
Crosshair: The fuck do you mean ‘another?!’
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