#is this how allo people feel?!?!!!?????

[liquid-queer]

You know when you think for a really long time about how romantic and sexual attraction are a spectrum

And then you realize you’re like- romantically in love with your s/o?

Because, aroace is defined as “little to no” and I think I just realized I’m the little-

Anyways I had thirty minutes of pure adrenaline cleaning yesterday lol

[sualne]

found back this thing from 2021

putting the addition directly onto the og post since nobody reblogs the full version:

'about this i feel a few people have misunderstood what i drew it for, my tags didnt help at all for sure and it is just one doodle, but i didnt made it as 'i'm questioning my sexuality and need to know what specific labels i am'. i've been well aware of what my whole deal is for years.

this was a silly doodle i drew as a recreation of all the thoughts and questions i had that went 'what is attraction? what is romance and sexual and platonic and friendship and something else entirely? how and why do we need to define feelings and relationships so much? why do people act the way they do, date the way they do, marry the way they do, live the way they do? how much does your own culture and time influence the way you do those things, the way you think you should act and feel? how much does amatonormativity influence and impact all of us? and why are some people so resistant against the idea of questioning and living out of these norms?' among many others things.

again, i drew years ago. i didnt want to post it because it felt unnecessarily personal and because people are insufferable about queerness.

EDIT: pls for the love of my sanity reblog the full post instead.'

[lunamay3]

I’m aromantic because I don’t experience sexual attraction. And I’m asexual because I don’t experience romantic attraction.

Anyone who has an issue with that can just deal.

[uncanny-tranny]

A big argument against asexuality and aromaticism is the idea that you can be too young to know. I remember people being so put out by the idea of somebody under eighteen identifying as aro or ace, and they made it known how they thought it was bad.

However... I really don't agree with that outlook. I knew something was up with me when my friends were developing a "normal" identity in the eyes of amatonormativity, and I was under eighteen. Mind you, I didn't have words to express how I felt, so I was in a perpetual state of feeling pressure to be "one of the normals." It made my life miserable because I was being dishonest to myself and cloaking who I was behind a layer of shame.

My point is that... when you know, you tend to know. Sure, your identity might change, but is that more important than making sure you are comfortable in yourself? Would you rather feel the way I did at my age hearing about my allo friends? Because it was unbearable, and I don't wish that on anybody.

[mirpkechi]

chat pleass Please understand that romance/sex repulsion Is In Fact, A Thing That Exists ohmygod Please. dawg i do Not wanna be sat here watching ym FLIRT AGGRESSIVELY. ON A GROUP CHAT PLEASE 😭

yes i know that the majority of people arent aspec, and a lot are prolly js neutral on stuff (as in most aspecs ive met are romance/sex neutral), but Please thats no excuse to be acting like romance/sex repulsed/averse people exist

like i myself am aroaceflux, so most of the time im favourable/neutral, but that doesnt mean that the repulsion isnt faint, its Very Much There.

not really much of a point in this, its just a rant ngl. js keep in mind how repulsed people feel and Keep Your Shi To Yourselves!!!!!!!!!!!!! just because you may be completely fine with romance/sex doesnt mean that others dont feel physicallg sick whilst thinking about it, nevermind being present whilst said shi is happening

[luedelouartandwriting]

i've been burnt out and unable to draw for basically the last two years, but i wanna try and pull myself out of it. so here is a teeny kabumisu for pride month.

[eclaire-went-bam]

although i think it's important to acknowledge the complexities of aro & ace identities, & to be welcoming of aroace identities that may be sex/romance favourable/hypersexual & seek those relationships, i think it's still important to acknowledge that completely romance/sex repulsed aroaces are still a minority in the ace community despite being the stereotype. & we should still listen to those voices,

[drh3nryj3kyll]

Hmmm, am I demiromantic or an aromantic desperately trying to be at least partially allo . . .

[redysetdare]

just because someone doesn't label an attraction on the split attraction doesn't make them allo in that attraction.

I don't label my other attractions because to me the only important ones to label are my romantic and sexual attractions as those effect me first and foremost. That doesn't mean I'm just allo in every other form of attraction. I'm not alloplatonic or alloaesthetic or allofamilial or whatever other ones (not in a dismissive way but in a 'there's so many i cannot name them all way'). I don't feel ANY attraction at all. I don't see a reason to label my other a-attractions because my lack of any attraction at all makes it feel a bit unnecessary for me personally.

[iridescentis]

i have to try so hard not to get upset when i have conversations with my family about love and sexuality because i know they will never understand anything outside of amatonormativity but fuck it hurts

being told that i will never have a best friend who will want to be with me forever because 'everyone will eventually leave because everyone wants to fall in love and build a family' just gets to me even though i know there are people who want that but it's just so hard to remember when no one in my life does

[questioning-pisces]

nobody understands aroace katniss everdeen HC like i do

[underwaterbanshee]

I’m just going to say it.

It’s not a tragedy that Deli never gets slammed down big style simply because sex is not the end all be all of existence.

I love that his story is that of an adult man, wanting a real, emotional connection to the person who slams him down, and that when he loses that--twice--in less than ten seconds, he knows that it won’t happen because he is has loved and lost.

But especially because love and affection was so integral to his desire.

You can be a horny twenty-something and not fuck around because the light of the bulb isn’t red enough on the mountains. Sometimes it be like that.

And it’s okay and wonderful to have that kind of a story represented.

Also, slamming Deli down big style by Karna or Colin or both is what fanfic is for.

[what-is-this-tomfoolery]

just once i would like to see an ace character not have smut written about them. im not saying ace people aren't allowed to have sex or feel sexual attraction but there's so little ace rep in media and when people (especially allo people) write fanfics or have head canons about ace characters that diminish their identities it just kinda sucks, especially with so little good rep. again I'm all for acespec characters who have sex or feel sexual attraction, its just that most of the time the characters who are being written about in that way canonically Don't Fuck and as someone who is ace it hurts to see that aspect of a character erased or ignored for the sake of allo enjoyment

[epicdogymoment]

gender and sexuality labels are so fucking hard how am i supposed to know how what i experience (already hard to pin down) compares to what "normal people" experience (completely unknown to me)

[dangerousdan-dan]

Just when I'm trying to be more social again, something will happen that reminds me why I'm a hermit

[hellaverse-critical-confessions]

(about aroace alastor)

... aroace people can date people????? where did you people find the impression that we can't or that we don't feel romantic or sexual love /lh. information about aroace people is so limited and far / few in between that if viv were to actually canonize alastor's sexuality, he would be amazing representation alongside being shipped or canonically being in a relationship. there is so little aroace representation like that and i crave to see more!!!!

to explain further, the general definiton for aromantic and/or asexual is a "orientation defined by a lack of or limited sexual/romantic attraction". some aro/aces feel absolutely no attraction in these aspects, some feel it sometimes or only towards certain types of people, and some people have fluid/ever changing feelings.

for example, aegosexual, which describes someone who feels disconnected from the subject of arousal, generally have little to no sexual attraction, but still consume sexual content, engage in sexual fantasies, or even masturbate! another example is lithromantic, which describes someone who feels romantic attraction but doesn't want it reciprocated or loses attraction when it's reciprocated, they may enjoy romantic relationships in theory but most likely will feel no romantic attraction or enjoyment in a romantic relationship.

i beg you guys, please learn about each of the spectrums before engaging in discourse about it. there are so many beautiful and cool labels people use to describe themselves, and if someone whose on either spectrum could see themselves in alastor and ship him even so, that's another win. please

- an aroace

Oh, definitely! Thank you for the informative ask.