#ishani talking

[arrangedaccident]

seeing as it seems pretty clear that logan won’t get a contract extension by the end of the season unless he can start finishing ahead of alex i hope he just gets wildly reckless with his racing for the rest of the season. he either pulls off a miracle with risky decision making (good drama) or costs millions in damage to a team that wasn’t going to sign him anyway (also good drama)

[julesdap]

obsessed with this difference between the actual episode 34 transcript and the original casting call sample for elgin, posted way way back before season 3 had even recorded. putting it under the cut for possible future tsv 3 episode spoilers

why, why did they change it. i think it's likely that this possibility - this necessity - might not have even occurred to elgin yet. or that she's keeping it to herself for now, not even trusting hayward enough to let him know. i think it'll definitely be easier said than done - the woundtree already has its own fanatics, and as paige mentioned at the end of that episode, the most effective way to kill a god is to kill all its followers.

i think it's a fucking breathtaking line though and i hope elgin gets the chance to say it later in the season.

[18shadesofmay]

another ask because im annoying and i love making friends and not giving them a single second to breathe but am introverted enough to keep off the DMs (unless approached first, wink wink.) :

if max verstappen wasn't such a menace to society (love him, though) which f1 driver would be taking home the chinese grand prix win? and why is it charles leclerc if ferrari wasn't an ass?

(i saw you reblog a f1 post and am currently praying to god you're interested in overpriced uncomfortable cars going vroom vroom in weird shaped circles.)

KEEP EM COMING i absoultely love this. human interaction. this is basically much needed rehearsal for real life situations.

YES i'm totally into f1. and you are too, i've observed, CRAZY good coincidence :)

alright, so whatever i'm going to say here, is going to be primarily based on what i've seen in quali and the sprint, but also i do expect the general pattern of this season to continue. at least until monaco or silverstone or spa.

as the son of a part-time f1 elitist, i must say i'm praying to all gods, even those who don't exist, that alonso performs. as a fan of the sport in general, i can't write a prediction post and not say that. the guy is still legendary. we saw that today.

that said, taking the recent and not-so-recent past into account, my expectations are different. unfortunately what i want to happen and what i think will happen are alag alag:

it's a battle for third place, basically. and THAT battle i'd love alonso to win, of course. but he's been showing signs of exhaustion in the final third of the race, and i'm not very optimistic this time round either. top performer, but i think he'll lose pace in the ultimate moments.

q3 today was that one scene in finding nemo where all the seagulls say "MINE MINE MINE MINE" for the fish except the fish is P2. gave me hope. there is chaos. there is excitement. checo will finish P2 though.

stroll was doing so well in the beginning, he was like 0.2 off of fernando at one point, iirc. of course, this isn't a podium shout but im going to keep an eye on lance, he looks exciting. impressive drive from bottas, btw. and nico. i have a soft spot for hulky.

let's address the elephant in the room, yeah? what the fuck was that from ferrari. as a self-aware ferrari fan, i'll cut this off before it turns into a rant, but i was optimistic about our chances in the sprint format. ANYWAY (youre welcome)

alonso got a 10 second penalty for his incident with sainz. if you go watch what actually happened, it's SO clearly excessive from the stewards.

okay so FINALLY, i talked a whole lot about nando and my THOUGHTS on the gp but didn't actually answer your question lmao. sorry for nerding out DAMN that's a big paragraph.

i think if max wasn't a maniac, we'd hear a lot more talk about lando. who will WIN the chinese gp if not for max? i'm sorry to be boring but honestly, checo.

the guy is consistent, no doubt about that. but the reason i say checo is (apart from the OBVIOUS monster car) his mentality and the way the season's shaping up for him. he's obviously confident, but also his greatest rival for the driver's standings, his PARTNER, is max. when you have that kind of competition, you're automatically a better you.

feel sorry for lewis.

god, i should shut up now.

[ichimakesart]

First Hellish Rebuke

The stone deserved it.

@raceofhearts got me inspired while talking about raising tieflings.

Ishani and Chiora belong to @raceofhearts

Malik - the boy is mine.

[vestaclinicpod]

Audio Drama Sunday - 13th August ✨

Happy #AudioDramaSunday, lovely people! I’ve listened to so much audio drama this week and my house is so clean as a result 🫧 

SPOILERS BELOW!

🌲@hellofromthehallowoods Starcrossed Gods!! I felt so brave daring to listen to this again. My heart 💔 Marolmar is written so well! Every sentence contains something to flinch at, it makes me sick to hear it all again. I’d also repressed the memory of how gut-wrenching Nikignik’s shouting at the end was, and how much it hurts to hear people trying to sing with a closed up throat. ANYWAY, I’m fine, thank you for asking. I’m not sure if the live show was released early due to logistical reasons, but I am fearful that it’s to provide context for what’s about to happen in the regular episodes (AKA tears and tears and tears for me). 

🦀 What an absolute delight to hear from the @thesiltverses cast again! These season recaps are so funny and it’s so heart warming to hear it when the cast of a show are clearly also its biggest fans. I’m SO excited for S3!!

🦮 @malevolentcast (34) what an episode!! If I recall correctly, this is the first time we’ve had an episode entirely without Arthur & John’s perspective? The Butcher is a worthy character to hold that mantle. Do I feel like I understand him more? No. Did I love being along for the ride? Absolutely. It’s also so weird to hear Arthur talking to John out loud when he thinks no-one can hear. I hope he makes it out in time! 

📻 @monstrousagonies (107) So thrilled to have this show back and I hope Hero is feeling much better! The first letter was so cute!! I’m sure there are lots of us who can relate to choosing love and kindness when we’re used to the opposite! Whichever bridge that little one finds, I’m sure it’ll be the loveliest by far!! 

🌒 @monkeymanproductions gave us the low-down on just how incredibly talented the Moonbase Theta, Out cast are in their Cast Special. Spoiler: Very. It was very wholesome to hear DJ Sylvis hyping everyone up and the episode is full of great AD and other recommendations! 

🎙Welcome to Night Vale is back!! I felt particularly targeted by the ad copy in this episode, but I’m sure that was their intention! This ep’s weather was particularly up my street too! I loved the harmonies! 

🎞 Tiny Terrors OOF hey so I found out what was up with Angela… and I didn’t like it one bit! I also need to know what the hell was happening at the end there. Jess, girl, you’ve got to stop getting yourself in these situations. It��s too much (for me to listen to)! 

🌍 @lastechoespod (8) I can’t believe it’s the last episode! Ishani Kanetkar was wonderful as Trast. I wish we could hear the final decision, but I guess I’ll just have to relisten and try decide for myself . . . 

🧛‍♂️ @re-dracula Uhoh, someone’s arrived in Whitby . . . I love Mina so much and Isabel AdomakohYoung is doing amazing job as her VA. She captures the good-hearted intelligence I love so much about the character!

 💫 Wolf 359 (38-46 + Special!) Oh MAN this podcast has my entire heart. Isn’t Memoria one of the best episodes of anything ever? Oh, Hera, I love you sooo much!!!!! I also loved the Lovelace cliffhanger at the end of 46 and the special was so different but so good! (Although listening to 2 hours of anything is a challenge!! I need a 20-30 min ep or I can’t fit it into my life) 

🎩 @ethicstownpod (7) OH MY GOD. January fans are looking a little bit bloody silly right now! What. The. Hell. Is. Going. On???? Please, if you haven’t yet started listening to this show, now is your time! It’s SO good and has so many twists and turns!! 

🥾@doyoucopypod (5) oh my GOD, imagine how horrifying it would be to be out in the woods to grieve your partner, only to hear their voice in the middle of the night. Nope. Absolutely not. Get out of the dead zone!! Wilson remains the goodest boy, even if his growls give me goosebumps! 

🎧 In this week’s The First Episode Of, W Keith Tims talks to the creator of Untrue Stories! These interviews are always fantastic and this show sounds so interesting for fans of sci-fi!! 

Thanks for reading! I’m so excited for more Regina Prime and to catch up with happenings in the Hallowoods next week! Hope you all have a restful weekend ✨

[mochigobrrrrrrr]

…at the edge of infinity…

I rarely talk about the other portion of my story, but Qin later on in life (or lives) becomes something of a demi god. His domain is shared with their beloved, Keter, the Crown. After every lifetime, they spend a rest period in their garden or on the edge of infinity, where the world tree is. It's here where Keter and Qin can rest and plant their memories in the form of flowers. Carrying memories after thousands of years would, more or less, not be very good, as it can overwhelm and become a burden. So, they plant both good and bad memories here. Only the ones they hold dear can they choose to carry with them forever. The ones Qin carries mostly come from his first mortal life.

Certain memories that are important to the pair can grow into bigger plants. One of the most treasured things in their garden is the life tree with Rajani and Qin's memories together, holding precious moments like their first daughters. It would without a doubt be Qin's favorite plant there, as he spends almost every cycle there sleeping under the tree with either his beloved or the souls of his first two children, Kashvi and Ishani.

[thevoicefromthestars]

sometimes you (i) get to the point where you (i) don’t feel like there’s any point in trying because you (i) will never be good at anything ever again, but:

1) that voice is a LIAR, because you - yes, you - contain multitudes and

2) at least one of those parts of yourself is a badass!!! it has survived every misery the universe has ever thrown at you, and like hell is this going to be the thing that breaks you!!!

this has been self-talk with ishani, please go drink a water, eat a snack, take your meds, and rescue your laundry <3

[travmalyubvi]

Review on Planes ships

review on planes ships (this time, indulging in some analysis)

Now, this is where some sensitive people might throw up.

"First Dusty got fucked by Skipper and Rip. Then he flew to Piston Peak, and there he got fucked by Blade, Maru, Cabbie and Windleifter. Dipper and her stick joined in. Even Nick came back to life to fuck Dusty." - dream after reading Planes smut.

To be honest, my knowledge of fanfiction is so limited. I write it (but no longer publish it), but I don't read it. So I won't be referring to any fanfics in any way

Dusty and Ishani

I adore Ishani and think she deserves more than what the movie makers gave her. Some time ago in 2021, I had a discussion with someone I am not in touch with now. Is Ishani a positive character or a negative one? I probably phrased the question wrong, but the point is roughly this. What makes a person a good person (plane, positive character) is not their actions, but their ability to realize their mistake and change. Ishani sincerely repents and later helps Dusty. That's why I think she is a good character. And yes, I do believe that a person changes. You don't have to rely on that, of course, but yes, it happens. Dusty and Ishani have a lot in common: first, a shared interest in racing, and second, similar stories. Dusty has to face hardship (and I'd even say discrimination from Rip) because he wasn't built for racing. Ishani (must be) having a hard time because of her gender. They get along well enough, there is chemistry and romance between them. I think Ishani is the best match for Dusty, and THIS IS NOT A SECRET. But it's true, Dusty might have a hard time trusting her. But, I think they will be able to overcome that

2. Dusty and Ripslinger

You know why I love this ship? Because you can write something really interesting, epic, driving, emotional, hate, love, tears, joy, roller coaster. Healthy relationships are fine and really cool, but do they provide the same range of emotions? By the way, I'm only talking about fictional relationships, only healthy ones are good in reality. Back to Rip and Dusty. They have so different life experiences, they are actually from different worlds. Different perspectives on many things and different ways of getting things done. I think sharing their experiences would benefit them, especially Rip. But for them to reconcile, much less the relationship and Rip's desire to change, something really meaningful has to happen. And I don't see any victim or Stockholm syndrome here. Dusty's humble, but he can stand up for himself. I don't think he'd allow himself to be disrespected.

3. Dusty and Skipper, Dusty and Blade

Why did I put them in the same paragraph? Because I have the same reason for disliking both of these pairings. No, it's not the age difference. It's about their canon relationship. I really love, adore the friendship, the mentorship, the "brotherhood". And it's insanely valuable to me. I just don't see them as romantic/sexual partners. No way. Dusty would have a hard time trusting Skipper, just like Ishani. Basically, I don't know what to say...with Skipper, the relationship would be more harmonious. Well the parallel with Nick in Blade's case...interesting

4. El Chu and Rochelle

Let's agree, this pairing by the creators failed. To be honest, they've always annoyed me. Their extremely weird interactions and El Chu's dumbass flitr...The song is great (although would it be great without Dusty?), but I don't believe Rochelle could just fall in love like that after one fucking song...

So that was my review for 4 ships that I have something to say about. There was no Blade/Nick, Blade/Maru, and Blade/Nick/Maru because I have nothing new to add. Everything about them has already been said by Pen and others, and I totally agree with them.

There's nothing to say about Dusty/Dipper, who were in the previous post - it's clear enough, I don't see the point in musing about it

All differences of opinion I undertake to solve in a duel on knives, to challenge to a duel is open.

Your opinion is welcome)

[violetren]

psst hi I am a huge fan of sstl, like it's probably the greatest fiction experience I've ever experienced, but I've never listened to any other works like it! would you recommend other works Ishani's been part of, or do you have any recommendations in general for, I guess, narrative fiction audio?

Oh for sure. Idk what exactly made you pick up ssttl or what about it struck a chord so for now I'm only gonna throw like 3 or 4 things out here based on vibe or plot similarities to ssttl and my personal preferences. If you wanna tell me more about what you're into I can try give you a wider range of recs.

First up, The Strange Case of Starship Iris.

If you picked up ssttl because it's sci-fi with lead characters of colour and queer rep, or because of how its futuristic in a way that feels believably fucked over by capitalism and yet still has a gentleness and hopefulness to it, or because you like character driven narrative then for sure give this a try.

It's also the reason I knew Ishani Kanetkar's name and knowing her name is why I immediately moved ssttl to the top of my "to listen to" list. The shows concept was cool enough to grab my attention but reading Ishani Kanetkar was in the leading role made me give it immediately. I haven't listened to all of the good doctor's work but I have noticed two things: 1, she is a fantastic VA. And 2, projects she's had a significant role in usually have a really cool concept behind them. She either has fantastic tastes, incredible luck, or both. Obviously read descriptions and see if something is to your taste before listening but like, no reason not to look up her other work and use it as a launch pad.

Back the tscosi rec. The story begins by following the harrowing day of biologist Violet Liu as her research vessel falls apart around her after an explosion. Against all odds someone is there to rescue her, captain Kay Grisham picks up her distress call, and the rescue comences. The rest of the season follows the fall out of that tragic explosion and heroic rescue.

The show is ongoing, currently has 2 complete seasons out with a 3rd (and I believe final) season to come.

Rec 2: Girl In Space

A funny and resourceful scientist lady, living alone in space, talking to her recorder logs and her ships glitchy AI (who may or may not have or be developing sentience), and one day being very surprised when suddenly she has a human person to talk to instead. Sound familiar?

The plot is actually very different though. Our girl X lives on a space station that can never return home and her whole existence is as much of a mystery as what exactly her mission is supposed to be. The soundscaping on this show combined with Sarah Rhea Werner's (and the rest of the casts) acting is absolutely amazing.

There is currently 1 season fully released and the second season is apparently due out this year. In reccing this I may have accidentally begun a relisten.

Rec 3: Wolf 359

This one is actually complete if that means anything to you. Figured I'd drop one in since the other two have been ongoing. Its a big one, over 60 episodes plus a ton of bonus episodes.

Wolf 359 follows the crew of the u.s.s haphaestus an isolated little research vessel orbiting a star designated Wolf 359. It starts out goofy and like there isn't gonna be much plot, this is a cunning ruse to lull you into a false sense of security before hurtling you into an emotional roller coaster that will make you fear for, cry for, laugh with, and grow to love the rag tag crew. The characters are very compelling in that they are allowed to be flawed, some to the point that they are unlikeable, but in that good way that means you're connected with the story and wanna see them get their comeuppance, not that they're badly written and make you wanna stop listening kinda way.

Also like half the cast is voiced by the writer Zach Valenti, and even telling you that, if you check the show out there are gonna be episodes where if you hear the credits list and go "wait, he was that many people!?" Amazing VA abilities.

Rec the fourth, The Penumbra Podcast.

TTP has two story lines and you can listen to one without ever touching the other but Imma rec both here because there is a reason this podcast as a whole makes so many rec lists for anyone looking to get into audiodrama series. Both storylines have very different vibes and approaches, but both deal overall subtly deal with what it is like growing as a person, how rewarding it can be, but also acknowledging how fucking hard that can be.

Story line one, the Juno Steel universe, aka the Junoverse. This is a sci-fi story with a film-noir aesthetic. It follows the titular, character private detective Juno Steel a dame with a chip on his shoulder nearly as deep as a skyscraper is tall, and the cases they take in Hyperion City, a mega colony on a futuristic Mars. There is an overarching plot even as we go from case to case until eventually we move beyond that format.

The second story line is Tales from the Second Citadel. Set in a post apocalyptic high fantasy setting, the Second Citadel. This story follows the intersecting tales of several of the kingdoms knights (and a few not knights too). One of the knights will sound very familiar, Sir Damien voiced by Matthew Zahnzinger who also voices Mikail Reza in ssttl. In a truly hilarious turn of events Sir Damien also has a life changing (romantic) encounter with a scale covered non human entity.

Both story lines are highly character driven and contain a lot of heart. They also both feature a cast that is diverse in terms of race, sexuality, and gender.

As I said if you tell me more about what you liked about ssttl or why you chose to listen to it I'd be happy to give some more refined recs. All of these save for the second citadel portion of tpp involve space stuff but if you're open to more supernatural or just more terrestrial sci fi I definitely have more options you could consider.

If you ever wanna shout about ssttl or any of these shows if you end up listening to any well then you know where to find me.

Oh left field bonus rec because I just got a note about a post I made about it, Where the Stars Fell.

Unkillable lady scientist specialising in cryptid studies moves to the strange little town of Jerusalem Oregon. Becomes roommates with a reclusive author. They get along much like oil and water, it is all very gay.

I am typically a little turned off by shows with so many religious references but this one manages to be religious in the way that Good Omens is religious. That is, it's not preaching religion, its just using characters and concepts people may be familiar with from Christianity and using them to tell a funky little supernatural story with naturally high stakes grounded by very human characters. (human in the sense that they are emotional and flawed and brilliant).

It just finished its first season a couple of month ago so everyone is waiting for season 2, myself included.

[penname-artist]

More Cursed WoC Gartic Phone

Or Garlic Phone as Dusty we call it

Prepare your eyes and your lungs (but don’t worry I’ll save the best for last)

Did a few short rounds here at first, starting with Cabbie casually abusing various members of the PPAA

and then we got on to potatoes for some reason-

Skipper got very NSFW for a brief spell-

And then we did the 10-round Gartic Phone, which always turns the pictures into absolutely not the thing that they were originally.

The thing we found fucking hilarious about this one, however, is that every character changes EXCEPT FOR DUSTY.

Literally, you could draw an orange and blue scribble, and everyone’s like

“Oh that’s Dusty!”

But any other character and you need clear context cues (Lightning and Blade are both red, Dipper and Ishani are yellow, etc)

Also can we please talk about the goldfish cracker Dipper

Next up is the Christmas Hurts edition of Dusty during the holidays, wherin

-He steals a Christmas ornament

-Forgets Christmas somehow

-A tree falls on him

-A tree PUNCHES him

-And a Christmas tree lot salesman boops him cynically

I dunno man, but happy belated holidaze I guess

And last

but NOT LEAST,

because this is literally the best one of the entire fucking night...

We did a Cabbie string.

We STARTED with Cabbie jumping off of a diving board.

As a plane.

That ENDED with...

“Cabbie is de-evolving into a whale now”

We turned him into Shamu.

He’s a Caborca now.

He has become one with the sea...

[arrangedaccident]

m’benga next week after reliving the horrors of war and killing a klingon general turned federation representative in his medbay

[ainyan]

Does anyone in the polycule have children? If yes, how does the polycule share parenting duties? If not, would they like children? Have they talked about it? Do they have a parenting plan in place?

I'll answer this for Nikali/Saganu/Theron:

Theron and Nikali share a child, Ishani, and have since before Saganu joined their relationship. Ishani is about three years old, and Nikali is currently pregnant with her and Saganu's first child.

For the most part, Theron handles the bulk of the childcare; Nikali and Saganu both have very demanding careers and are frequently away from Odessen. Meanwhile, Theron has found that he can still do his job as the Director of Operations for the Alliance without having to be on-site, allowing him to be the parent-on-call most of the time. In discussion with his wife and her consort, he's agreed that this will be the case regardless of who the parent of the child is.

That said, Ishani spends a great deal of time in Odessen's childcare creche - particularly with the Force Users who are teaching her to harness her fledgling powers. This leaves Theron free to do his work during the day, while still being available in case anything happens to go wrong (as happens; there aren't a lot of experts out there on half-human, half-Chiss children who are heirs to the Shan Force potential).

Nikali acknowledges that she's a decent mother, but her own personal hang-ups have made it difficult for her to truly bond with her daughter. Saganu is anxious to be a father, and has been taking time to spend with Ishani when he can, but in the end, he knows he'll never hold a candle to Theron's natural abilities.

And no one cares whose child is who's; they're all loved regardless.

Curious about some of my polyships? Ask!

Thank you for the ask!

[acanadiansim]

Sims In Bloom Ep: 2 .❀。• *₊°。 ❀°。

.❀。• *₊°。 ❀°。.❀。• *₊°。 ❀°。.❀。• *₊°。 ❀°。.❀。• *₊°。 ❀°。

aaaand we're back with the life of my Sims in Bloom matriarch, Daisy Bloom - if you couldn't tell Daisy was raised on a farm in the rural south which is why she sometimes slips back into her old habits (especially when she's nervous lol)

cameo from best girl liberty about her girl problems with summer and travis

.❀。• *₊°。 ❀°。.❀。• *₊°。 ❀°。.❀。• *₊°。 ❀°。.❀。• *₊°。 ❀°。

Liberty:Daisy, you would not BELIEVE what Summer told me last night- Daisy: This about Travis, right? You two shouldn't be fighting over some guy- Liberty: I'm not fighting for TRAVIS, I'm fighting for my dignity! Liberty: Ugh, whatever, tell me about you and Ishani now Daisy: *nervously* What? What on Earth are you talking about? Liberty: Oh come on, I totally saw your little midnight rendezvous at the park. Daisy: Liberty that is so creepy. Liberty: I was in the area! Daisy: Why were you scoping out my date?? Liberty: So it WAS a date! Daisy: Libertyyy Liberty: whatever, just call her, Daisy, i need the entertainment Daisy: Fine you little perv Liberty: Hey!

Daisy: *on the phone* Hey sugar, I know you've been stressed from work and everything so I was wondering if maybe we could go on... a date? Just us two, get away from everything. Liberty: *taking notes* Daisy: yes? aw, that's wonderful baby, I'll see you then! *to the sky* THANKS JESUS

[wearingaberetinparis]

ever since you mentioned an upcoming Indian wedding in RAKWME I've been so excited. I've only ever seen an Indian wedding written out in a fanfic once... I'm curious to see how you describe it since it's quite a large event to write about.

despite the fact that I come from a fully Indian family, I've only ever been to one wedding (that I remember) when I was younger. I don't remember all the details since it was years ago and I was completely exhausted by the time it was over but there are a few things that I thought you might be interested in...

1. so. many. people... it's almost comical the number of people you don't know despite them probably being related to you. I don't even know whose wedding it was 😭 there were so many people coming and talking to me and I didn't have a clue who any of them were... but that didn't matter because in Indian culture everyone (and I mean EVERYONE) is called uncle/aunty/brother/sister... doesn't matter whether you are related or not.

2. the outfits. the makeup. the mehendi/henna. the jewellery!! for some weird reason, the amount of colour there reminds me of the ball in the 2015 Cinderella movie (the one starring Lily James... can't stop thinking abt jily when I see her name.) I've seen the pictures of my mum's and other relatives' weddings... they looked unreal... like literal Bollywood stars. the detail of the mehendi is insane and takes HOURS. it's quite wholesome seeing all the women helping the bride to get ready.

3. THE FOOD. first you think the preparation for the wedding is exhausting... just wait til you get to the actual event. once you're done, the food all laid out on banana leaves looks and tastes like literal heaven. I'm not even exaggerating bc I'm not that much of a food lover... at that time I was incredibly picky. the food is exquisite.

4. the music!! the singing!!! the dancing!!!!!! the party vibes are incredible and I usually hate parties ( I'm not the outgoing type.)

I did not expect to write this much- it's like my brain exploded into this huge rant due to my enthusiasm (sorry!) hopefully this is useful to you in some way??

overall, what I wanted to say is that I'm so excited to see what you have in store for Ishani's wedding... your writing in general is just incredible and I can't wait to see my own culture reflected in your work :)

I will try my very best to make it an amazing experience for you! Although... be patient. The wedding is a couple of chapters into the future still!

[lilmisslostinfiction]

Dear Taylor swift,

my friend Ishani always says that letters are always the best to express how you feel, i never tried writting one though i am not good at expressing, i think. since i have gotten introduced to english music, i have been in love with your songs. i never knew who you were i just knew that their was some singer named taylor swift and she sang the best songs , i never knew anything about the drama going on in your life. because here in my home we listened to music we had very little access to internet and i didn't search you up until 7th grade after reputation when my junior from school asked me about all the easter eggs from look what you made me do , and i was like i pretended to know them while i had no clue [yeah i regret lying but i was embarassed okay] so i went home looked you up, and i was done for, like the music video the all the other era's and the whole vibe of you , it was like my calling like i was born to be a swiftie and it was my purpose.

to you i may be someone in a world but to me you are my world, my personality my words my wisdom my knowledge my craziness my happiness and everything has become related to you. you have become the sun i revolve around and i live in a swift universe. i have always been a out of the box person because i was excluded from everything everyone did , i was the shy one , the one who doesnt talk the one whose too awkward and no one heard me while i spoke , no one cared enough to make me laugh , no one cared enough about me to give me time enough to feel comfortable with them to share my trauma and sadness somehow everyone expected me to hear them but never be heard, but when you sing songs that break my heart and hurt me in the best way, and make me feel heard , i feel like i am home.

i have hated this world , hated my life and tried ending it a couple times but then i didnt do it i held onto you and to whatever purpose life has in store for me but i stayed here and i celebrate my 1 and half year of life that i chose to live, this is the 1 year 7 month of my life that i chose to live , and hearing you sing you're on your own kid today and feeling lost but somehow found , i feel really great that it doesn't matter if the world knows me , i know this world and thats okay , thats fine , i know you .

i know this world and its bad and its good, and you are the best thing it currently has ,for me atleast. and i am hoping that i get to see you someday performing live and scream my lungs out in a stadium full of swifties because i gave myself one more chance at a life , i want it to be worth it. and you make it worth it.

i dont know whats the purpose of this letter , i simply kept on typing and let the words flow and they did , i wrote everything i felt and now its a mess of different stories , but each one of them had you.

i think you are a very big part of my life and maybe that's why. am writting this because i feel comfortable enough to feel happy about you and with you , i cry to you and your songs and i never cry so maybe i think you have seen the worst parts of me and i think you deserve the best one's too.

with love,

MJ

[gladdyator18]

Did You Miss Me?

Summary: Jason didn’t about his cousin, Diego, following him into the other universe, so when they meet for the first time, Jason is star-struck. Diego then takes it upon himself to be the good, older cousin that Jason missed dearly.

Word Count: 2005

⚠Warning⚠: Mild swearing (both in English and Spanish)

Jason Kai-Sugimoto and Diego Cortez. Both children of psychopathic killers, but from a different universe. Jason is the son of Lucas and Courtney, and Diego is the son of Rokai. When Jason's mother had him go to the Golden Hearts' universe, Rokai did the same with his son, both parents knowing they'd be safer there. Jason doesn't know that Diego is alive and in the same universe as him, but Diego does.

It's been a year since the cousins came to the Golden Hearts' universe, and they've both found families that took them in. Jason is staying with Sharena and Baisho with their daughter, Ishani, and Diego is staying with a pastor and is playing as the church's drummer.

The two cousins would pass by each other frequently, whether in school or on the streets. As Jason's older cousin and only real family left, it's Diego's job to watch over him. Diego has been watching over his baby cousin for as long as he can remember, and he promised his aunt that he would always be by his side, no matter what. Diego is fulfilling that promise from afar. The young man has yet to reveal himself, but he hopes today will be the day.

It was a Saturday morning, and Diego was on his way to finally see his cousin. When he arrived at the Sugimoto house, he knocked on the door and waited. After a while, Sharena answered the door.

"Oh, hello!" she greeted, "You must be... Diego, right? Pastor Garcia's son and the church's drummer, yes?"

"Yes, ma'am," he said, "Uh, is Jason here?"

"Yeah! Please, come in!"

The young man walked passed the businesswoman, silently marveling at the interior.

"How do you know Jason, dear?" Sharena asked.

"Should I tell her that I'm his cousin?" Diego wondered.

"He's my... classmate at school," Diego lied, "I just... wanted to get to know him better."

Sharena felt herself smiling.

"Jason, honey!" Sharena called out, "You have a visitor!"

In seconds, Jason slid down the banister with a wide grin.

"Yeah, Mom?" Jason asked before seeing Diego, "Who's this?"

"This is Diego," Sharena answered, "The church's drummer?"

"Oh, yeah! I remember you! You've gotta teach me how to drum like that!"

"Oh, uhm, sure," Diego said, "I guess I can show you a few tricks."

"Yes!"

The young boy pumped his fists in the air. Sharena looked down at her watch before wincing.

"I've gotta go; I've got to get to work," Sharena said, "You're more than welcome to stay, Diego. Jason, watch the house, okay?"

"Yes, Mom." Jason said.

Sharena kissed her son before leaving the two boys. Jason breathed out a heavy sigh before looking up at the dark-skinned teen.

"So, Diego," Jason began, "What do you want to do?"

"I wanted to talk with you about something important," Diego said, "You're gonna want to hear this."

Diego's tone was very stern, and Jason didn't question it. Jason led the teen to the living room, and the two sat on the velvet sofa.

"So, what did you want to talk about?" Jason asked.

"Can you tell me what happened to your family?" Diego asked.

The question caught Jason off guard.

"What are you talking about?" Jason asked, "My mom just went off to work; my father's left for work long before my mom and my little sister went to hang out with some friends at the park."

"No," Diego said sternly, "Your biological family."

Jason's eyes widened.

"W-What do you mean?" Jason asked.

"You're biological parents' names were Courtney Larksgale and Lucas Kai, correct?" Diego asked, "Your uncle was Rokai Larksgale, I'm guessing?"

The names Diego said were names Jason hasn't heard in a long time.

"All three of them were taken and killed. Before Lucas, Courtney, and Rokai died, they sent their children to another universe to live a safer life," Diego explained, "Both children are safe and happy, exactly what their parents wanted; however, one is unaware of the other's existence."

Jason's eyes were still wide as he listened to Diego.

"W-Who the hell are you?" Jason asked, standing up, "How do you know that?"

"Jason, did you have a cousin?" he finally asked.

Jason's eyes softened, and his body relaxed.

"I-I did," Jason said, "His name was..."

The young boy soon looked up at the teen, and pieces gradually clicked together.

"D-Diego...?" Jason asked, his eyes welling with tears.

"Did you miss me, ¿primo?" Diego asked.

Jason let out a sob before leaping into Diego's arms, tightly embracing him. Diego grinned before hugging his cousin back.

"Está bien, Jasón," Diego said, "I'm here."

Diego brought his cousin down on the couch and had him sit on his lap as he cried into his chest.

"I missed you so much, Diego!" Jason cried, "¡Pensé que ellos también te alcanzaban!"

"But they didn't," Diego said, "Your Uncle Rokai made sure of it. When he heard about what your mother did for you, he begged her to do the same for me, and now... I'm here, and I'm not leaving you, primo."

Jason's crying soon turned into silent sniffling. Oh, how Jason missed Diego. He thought for sure he was dead, but he wasn't. He was here, being cradled in his arms. When Jason finally calmed down, he looked at Diego and smiled.

"I still can't believe you're here," Jason said, "Pero, ¿cómo sé que eres mi primo favorito?"

"Only cousin, get it right, cabrón," Diego said, "Ask me anything."

Jason hummed as he thought of some questions.

"What is my favorite color?" Jason asked.

"Dark red," Diego said, "Specifically burgundy."

"Favorite music genre?"

"R&B."

"Favorite sound?"

"Ocean waves and whale cries."

"Stand name?"

"Oracle."

"Damn, he's good." Jason thought.

Jason stared down at his cousin, who had the straightest poker face ever.

"Okay... what is something that only you know that not even my parents or uncle knew?" Jason asked.

Diego averted the boy's gaze as he hummed in thought.

"There are a few things I could name," Diego began, "But the one that I will never forget is that you have a sweet, sensitive spot right here."

Diego proved his point by squeezing Jason's top ribs, causing the young boy to squeal and giggle.

"Yup, still as ticklish as ever I see," Diego said.

"Diegohohohoho! Ahahahehehe! Wahahahaaait!" Jason giggled.

"Wait? Wait for what?"

Jason twisted and turned as his older cousin attacked his ribs, really close to his armpits.

"Plehehehease! Don't go any higheheheheheher!" Jason begged.

"Higher, you say?" Diego asked.

Ignoring Jason's pleas, Diego wiggled his fingers into his armpits, causing the boy to double over and laugh into his cousin's shoulder.

"Nahahahaha! Diehehegohoho! I sahahaid dohohohon't!" Jason cackled.

"I never listened to your dumbass when we were younger," Diego said, "¿Por qué empezar ahora?"

When Jason tried to punch Diego's chest, the older cousin simply pinned him to the couch and went to town.

"Diegohohoho! ¡Dejahaha de hacermehehehe cosquillahahahahahas!" Jason laughed.

"Heh, I tickled the Spanish outta you." Diego chuckled.

Diego promptly moved his hands down to his cousin's ribs and raked his fingers across every bone, even in the spaces. This drove Jason up the wall. The young teen grabbed his cousin's wrists and tried to pull them away, but his hands were bolted to his ribs.

"Would you look at that," Diego commented, "You're keeping my hands in place for me to tickle you. You must've missed me a lot,"

"Shut uhuhuhuhuhup!" Jason giggled out, "When the hehehehehell did you get sohoho strohohohohong?"

"I was always stronger than you, cabrón." Diego said.

Diego grinned as his cousin gave a wild buck when he massaged his thumbs into his hips.

"¡Diego, tuhuhuhuhu pendejohohohohoho!" Jason cried, "Please stahahahahap!"

Diego's eyes widened as he halted his attack. Jason panted, dramatically placing a hand over his head.

"T-Thahahanks." Jason panted with a giggle.

When Jason looked at his cousin, the look on Diego's face made him want to vomit in fear. The amount of ominous energy radiating off this teen was at a very dangerous level.

"D-Diego...? I-I am soho sorry," Jason stammered, "Y-You wouldn't stop, and I-"

"I'd save your breath if I were you, cabrón..." Diego said in a low voice, "You missed me so much, didn't you? You think that just because you got older, you can say things like that to me?"

Jason wanted to disintegrate. When he tried to move from beneath his cousin, Diego shifted his weight onto Jason's legs, preventing his escape.

"You know, I was gonna go easy on ya, primo, but no..." Diego said, resting his hands on his cousin's ankles, "You want to be a sabelotodo, thinking you can give me sass."

"Diego, please don't!" Jason begged, "You've tickled me enough; I can't anymore!"

Diego stared into his cousin's grayish-blue eyes, the fear very evident. However, there was something more to it. Behind that fear, Diego saw a flicker of joy and happiness.

"He's enjoying this." Diego thought.

The older teen glanced at his cousin's white-socked feet and grinned.

"Say, Jason," Diego began, "¿Sabes si todavía tienes cosquillas en los pies?"

The question made Jason shudder. He tried to pull his legs out, but it was no use. Diego only grinned before raking his dull nails along the young boy's soles. The young teen squealed before laughing an adorable, boyish laugh.

"NAHAHAHAHAHA! DIEGOHOHOHOHOOOO!" Jason laughed, "STAHAHAAAP! NOT THEHEHERE!"

"No te preocupes, Jasón," Diego said, "I'll stop... if you say that you missed me."

Jason's laughter only escalated in volume.

"I already told him I missed him!" Jason panicked, "Wasn't he just holding me while I was crying?!"

Jason flopped around like a fish out of water, trying to escape, but Diego was a lot heavier than he was. Unfortunately for Jason, he wasn't going anywhere anytime soon.

"OKAY, OKAHAHAHAHAHAY! PLEHEHEHEHASE STAHAHAP!" Jason laughed, "ENOHOHOHOUGH!"

"Not until you say you missed me!" Diego said over his cousin's boisterous laughter.

"¡HIJO DE PUTAHAHAHAHAHAAA! I TOHOHOHOLD YOU ALREADYHYHYHYHY!"

"¿Qué fue eso...?"

Diego twisted himself around so he was facing his cousin's feet. Diego placed a hand over both ankles before scribbling his fingers across Jason's feet. The young teen exploded with laughter.

"DIEGO! NO! I'M SOHOHOHOHOHORRYHYHYHYHYHYHY!" Jason cried, "PLEHEHEHEHEASE! I CAHAHAHAHAHAN'T!"

"¿No puedo que? Can't take a little tickling?" Diego deadpanned, "You've got the blood of a Larksgale; you can handle something as small as this."

Jason sat up and started pounding on his cousin's broad back, all while laughing his head off.

"PLEHEHEHEHEHEASE! STAHAHAAAP!" Jason half-laughed, half-whined, "WHAT DO YOHOHOU WANT FROM MEHEHEHEEEEE!?"

"For you to say you missed me," Diego said, "Plain and simple,"

"HAVE YOU GONE MAHAHAHAD!? I TOLD YOU I DIHIHIHIHID!"

"Guess I forgot."

Diego's aloofness made Jason cackle. Despite being tickled to death by his cousin, Jason didn't mind this at all. He missed physical intimacy, and after his parents were taken and killed, he thought he would never get that again. But when Sharena, Baisho, and Ishani took him in, Jason got that back, but honestly, it didn't feel the same to him. Having his cousin here, someone of his blood having a moment like this with him made him feel like he was on cloud nine.

"OKAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAY! I MISSED YOHOHOHOHOU!" Jason cried, finally giving in, "¡DIEGO, POR FAVOHOHOHOHOR PARAHAHAHAHAAAA!"

Diego smirked before stopping. Jason flopped back on the couch and sucked in the much-needed air. The older of the two got off his cousin before sitting up on the couch. Silence befell the household, the only sound coming from a panting Jason. After Jason caught his breath, he sat up and glanced at his cousin.

"Did you miss me, too, Diego?" Jason suddenly asked.

The older teen looked down at the young boy and nodded.

"More than you'll ever know." Diego said.

Jason, overwhelmed with emotions, smiled and threw his arms around his cousin. Diego smiled and gave Jason a tight squeeze.

"I said it twice, and I'll say it again, primo," Jason said, "I missed you so much..."

"I missed you, too, cabrón..." Diego said.