#it definitely changed now

[youchangedmedestiel]

My thoughts just after finishing Supernatural

One year ago on this exact same day I finished SPN. I watched 15x18, 15x19 and 15x20 in a row. I just ate dinner between 15x18 and 15x19 (weird dinner). After watching episode 15x20, I wasn't that pissed off about the end. It changed now, because I got the time to think about it.

See, I knew Cas wouldn’t appear in the last two episodes, but somehow I still hoped that the deal with the Empty wasn’t the reason, because he deserved to be happy. As I progressed through season 15 I felt it coming, even though I was hoping until the last second. And when I got to episode 15x18, I understood that it was this deal that was going to kill him but I didn't know how. That confession scene destroyed me but anyway I went to eat my dinner while being destroyed and then I came back to SPN to watch the last two episodes, knowing I wouldn’t see Cas anymore.

Then came episode 15x19, I've read often that people prefer to ignore 15x20 and I can totally understand (Dean deserved to live free and happy), but 15x19 is NOT a satisfying ending for me, because Cas is still in the Empty (well maybe not, but we don’t know that yet) and I just can’t, he can’t stay there, dead, I can’t accept that.

This is what allows me to appreciate 15x20 a little bit. But it’s not the only reason, because in this last episode I spotted several empty bottles of alcohol in Dean’s room and you all know why. He misses Cas, for sure, at least it’s my headcanon because I need it. Plus, he doesn’t stay long alive after Cas’s death, there is no real timeline. He couldn’t ask Jack to bring him back because Jack told them he wouldn’t intervene anymore and left. So maybe their hopes to get Cas out without Jack were at zero. But I’m sure Dean searched in the bunker’s library when he had the time to before he died. He searched for a way to get Cas out. And then he died (unfortunately, it still hurts). 

Which brings us to episode 15x20. The end of SPN is “good” in a sense that Dean wanted Sam to have a life, a normal apple pie life, so it’s a happy ending for that, because he achieved his goal but HE DESERVED to have that too, for himself, that or anything he wanted, not only for his little brother but FOR HIM AS WELL. 

AND ABOUT CAS? Well about Cas, especially the crumbles we got with “Cas helped” I totally understand why people feel pissed about it, I kind of feel like that too now. But when I first saw this scene, I was happy to hear about Cas because I already knew he wasn’t in the last two episodes so I wasn’t going to be as disappointed as people that waited to see the episode when it aired.

We learn that Cas remade Heaven (with Jack’s help) to do a Heaven Dean deserves, and I - for me it was like Cas fucking succeeded to give Dean what he deserved. He not only saved his life multiple times, but also told him he loved him, made him believe that he did and gave him freedom (for a short amount of time, I’m really pissed about that for sure and I’m sure Cas is too, like he wasn’t expecting him so soon) but he also changed Heaven for him, to make one he deserved.

HE CHANGED THEE ENTIRE HEAVEN FOR THE MAN HE LOVES. I’m going to cry writing this, because that’s like the greatest love story ever told. And yes I would have done things differently, but I can’t and with what they gave us I do what I want. And we have an angel of the Lord, that rebelled against Heaven and that was dead, being back and building a new Heaven for Dean to enjoy eternity with the people he loved. He knew Dean was made of love and he needed a space to express it, and Cas gave it to him (with Jack of course) but damn *typing with tears in the eyes* that still hits me soooo damn hard. Because when someone love you enough to tell you they do without excepting something in return, sacrifice themselves while doing it without having an answer about whether their feelings are requited, and remake Heaven for you to have the afterlife/eternity you deserve, nothing can beat that. THIS here, this is what grabs my heart and clenches it every damn time. The greatest love story ever told. No one, NO ONE can change my mind.

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

going through my old journals as part of therapy homework and i'm reading a section written in the emotional wreckage of a full-on breakdown when i get hit with this line:

There is never a satisfying answer to ‘Why didn’t they love me?’

like wow babe. good fucking point

[that-g3-artist]

trying out pixel art for the first time! here's the boys in the style of four swords/minish cap!

[wasyago]

quick "chip" sketch from ep 109

[molinaesque]

"What are you?" "Oh, I'm you, sweetie. You just... give it a little time."

[alllgator-blood]

I love destroying squid's mental health it is my favorite thing <- literally bullied Kallamar into getting the coward trait just cause I thought it'd be fitting

NO IT REALLY IS FITTING THOUGH I actually didn't know the bishop followers' traits were randomized at first because mine made so much sense. Kallamar was a lustful coward, leshy was celibate and a sloth, and nari was lustful too but was a jerk who would start a fight with leshy and/or webber literally every single day. Idr what heket was, I think she just worked and prayed more efficiently than everyone else, just butch girl shit <3 I DISTINCTLY remember my shamura glitching and offering me stuff at the altar 24/7 which is not a trait but I thought it was funny

Bullying a follower into becoming a coward takes actual effort, so here is your reward for being so committed to making this fictional traumatized squid's life miserable:

[aestheticallynotdeerlightful]

Distance

.

(Please do not use, trace, or repost my works anywhere without explicit permission from me first, thank you <3)

Behold the painting I spent 16hrs on (well it’s technically 5 seperate paintings Shh ) but uhh Tada! I think looking at it now there’s definitely stuff I could’ve changed and improved so if i ever remake this I’ll do it then

[natalieleif]

I know Jack and Maddie's relationship in canon is probably MEANT to be seen--depending on the episode--as a pretty bog-standard, 2000s-era "idiot big dad and exasperated, smart wife who puts up with him" trope.

BUT

my personal favorite interpretation is that BOTH are equally genius engineers who are also equally on the autistic spectrum, with a specific hyperfixation on ghosts and mad science.

The main difference is that Maddie has siblings and female social expectations, so she had to learn how to mask in ways that are seen as sociable and polite and attractive and "smart." When she does bumble major social cues (such as not recognizing Vlad's flirting until Danny points it out decades later, or humiliating her kids by showing up in a hazmat suit at school), it feels more "socially acceptable" from her.

She genuinely loves Jack because he could not care less about her being Feminine or Socially Acceptable. He just wants to shout with her about ghosts! So the nanosecond she's around him she can yank the mask off and go chasing spirits with a toaster turned into a machine gun.

[callmehere-iwillappear]

art from chapter 7 of idiot's guide! twins my beloved <3

(id in alt)

[seryonn]

A while ago I was doing another play through and I misread Kokichi saying something like this

(Not a fan of how it turned out, but it's FINEEEE)

[itsdefinitely]

fun times

[jklpopcorn]

god's specialest little chew toy be upon ye

[raiiny-bay]

the boys, 80s-ified

[mattodore]

theo’s bedroom is slowly coming together

[only-lonely-www]

So basically ATLA brain rot has hit me like a truck

[camelspit]

Note! Definition of a sexyman:

An often pathetic and/or evil man who is sexy (but perhaps not in the conventional sense) this is NOT your favorite character!!

Brant [REDACTED] by @tw-5

Grady Ruewen by @doodle-do-wop