#it was a very fun journey! i played them all within this year

[buglaur]

tutorial contents:

1 ‣ gshade & photoshop actions 2 ‣ template or cropping & colouring 3 ‣ notifs & pop-ups

okay hi! i have a really old editing tutorial from back in january that i've been linking people to, but it's pretty outdated by now. i also keep getting anons asking about the same things, which is fine, but i always have to go searching for the post explaining it, so having it all in one place will be a lot more convenient lol

i use a ☠ copy of photoshop cc 2017 to edit my screenshots, however the majority of everything i'm doing also works on photopea

photopea is an online version of photoshop that's 100% free and works very well! i can't recommend it enough, it's fantastic

first things first, you're going to need some screenshots to edit. for the sake of this tutorial i'll be working with this one of raffy:

in all honesty, gshade will do most of the work for you. of course it's not needed, but i definitely don't think i could live without it! in this screenshot i used sunset n' vinyl by nesurii

when opening the screenshot, the first thing i do is run it through 2 photoshop actions:

butter action by early-grape

smooth sharp (no topaz) by poolbrop

to add actions in photoshop go:

windows > actions > the 4 lines at the upper right corner of the newly opened window > load actions > your downloads folder > open up the .atn files!

if you're using photopea, as far as i'm aware you can't use photoshop actions, but i've found that 'filter > stylize > oil paint' and 'filter > sharpen > smart sharpen' have a very similar effect when using the right settings. try these:

i like these two actions because they smooth everything out nicely, but keep it sharp at the same time! i always run butter before i run smooth sharp, however butter may leave you with 2 layers. make sure to merge these layers before running smooth sharp to achieve the full effect.

here's a before and after (of the photoshop action):

from here you can move on to step 2

before anything else i want to share the template that i use to make editing a lot faster. you don't need to use it but it's definitely made things a lot easier for me! it's a .psd file and will work perfectly in photopea

download (simfileshare)

if you're using the template you can skip right on to the next section, as it's already cropped to the right size and has the colouring folder included. just drag your screenshot into it and resize to fit the height.

if you're not using it, crop your edited screenshot to:

1707 width x 1280 height

then adjust the colours to your liking. it always varies slightly depending on the picture but my regular process for each screenshot would be:

up the saturation by 8%

up the lightness by 3%

up the contrast by 12%

all of this can be done by looking in the 'images > adjustments' tab

you should end up with something similar to this!

if you want to add a moodlet or social interaction or anything similar, it's all the same process. what you'll need is a screenshot of it straight from the game. i just press the 'c' key to capture them! i'll be working with these two:

for the blue notification i'm going to select it using the box select tool. try to get it as exact as possible. one you have it selected

for photoshop users:

click on the 'select and mask...' option located at the top

adjust the global refinements at the side as follows:

smooth: 70 feather: 0.0px contrast: 50% shift edge: 0%

for photopea users:

go to select > modify > smooth

set it to 15

select 'ok' and press 'ctrl + c' to copy it, then 'ctrl + v' to paste it into your screenshot. adjust the size and position and you should end up with something like this:

next you want to add the transparent border around the notification. if you're using my editing template, right click on the reference notif in the layers tab and select 'copy layer style' (photopea > 'layer style > copy'). from there you can paste that layer style onto your own notif through the layers tab.

if you're not using the template, here's how to set it up on photoshop:

right click your notification layer and select 'blending options'

under styles, tick the checkboxes for stroke and drop shadow

input these settings:

on photopea, it should be more or less the same. repeat the exact same process with the social menu option, but instead of selecting it with the box select tool, use the magic select tool. in the end you should end out with this!

from here you're finished! thanks for reading! go to file and export as png

if you've got questions never hesitate to ask, just make sure to read the faq in my pinned. i might edit this post soon to include the gen intro traits and aspirations bit, but this is all for now. hope it helps, my editing process post has been in need of a revamp for a very long time. i haven't proof-read this so apologies for any mistakes!

[luckykiwiii101]

Hey Upper East Siders. Want to play a game…? One condition, this time you HAVE to play by the rules. Or it’s game over…

- XoXo, Gossip Girl 💋 💌

And who am i? That’s one secret i’ll never tell, You know you love me - XoXo, Gossip Girl 💋 💌

————————————————————————————————————————

♥️🖤♥️🖤♥️🖤♥️🖤♥️🖤♥️🖤♥️🖤♥️🖤♥️🖤

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Hey Upper east siders.

It’s that time of year again. When the sleigh bells are jingling and people add more items to their never ending wish list.What if i told you…it’s more than just a wish list.Ever wanted something so bad that you would do ANYTHING to get it? Well luckily, i’m not talking about signing a contract in blood. You don’t even have to lift a finger, nor shed any blood…or tears. You can have everything you’ve ever wished for.You just have to play a little game. Will you accept this dance…? If the answer is yes…keep on reading.

Now that we’re nice and ready. We can get started on this super quick and fun journey. If i didn’t say this earlier, GOSSIP GIRL HERE!! and i have the BIGGEST news ever! YOU will have entered/woke up in the void state within a week and manifested your dream life! Maybe you’ll do it in less than a week, and have a holly jolly Christmas XoXo. Just depends on how determined you are.

You know what happens if you aren’t…right? There are two outcomes. Let’s go over them shall we..?

“Will you have this dance..?” “No”

(Option A)

SPOTTED: Lonely Boy. Can’t believe they didn’t want their dream life, only in exchange for a little persistence. How tragic……And EVERYONE is talking. Wonder what Blair Waldorf thinks. If only they knew how easy life was…

“Will have you this dance…?” “Yes”

(Option B)

SPOTTED: SPOTTED, On the steps of the Met: B. Looking perfect, as usual. Feeling perfect, as usual. Having everything they’ve ever wanted. So much for such little “work”. Did they really think they could just waltz over here and not manifest their dream life? So effortless, it’s almost funny.

So……Which do you choose?

(thought so)

Option B?! Good choice. Looks like Little J will have everything they want and a ticket to the inner circle. Why waste precious time dreaming when waking life is SO much better?

Luckily, your journey will be very short, and VERY sweet.

YOU’VE BEEN INVITED!

Serena Van Der Woodsen, your invitations just arrived. With strings attached. Come out, come out, wherever you are.

Gossip Girl here…enough with the stalling. Now for the main event.

You will spend the next 7 days, accepting that you are a void master.

What is the void state?

Well well well. Look what we have here. An overcomplicator on our hands, caught red handed. (Just kidding, XoXo)

It’s a state of pure consciousness. When you are detached from your physical senses completely. You can’t hear, see, smell or feel anything. Must be heaven if your name is Dan Humphrey.

Did you know, that you enter the void state everytime you fall asleep? Shocked? Well don’t be. It’s nothing special. Things always work out for you after all, should be used to it by now. Doesn’t it feel weird to finally have Gossip Girl on YOUR side? Can’t wait to pry into your success soon……and write ALLLLLL about it. You better not disappoint me, you know what happens next. Don’t wanna end up like lonely boy……do you?

“But i don’t believe in the Void State.”

- Said no sane person ever. Unless your Queen B with a broken heart.

Here you go! 💋💌💋

Does little J want a virtual slap of common sense? Don’t tempt me. A few clicked pics of your journey home could turn into a journey to hell. You know you love me. XoXo.

How do I enter the void state?

(Here you go 💌💌💌)

Looks like entering the void state really IS sugar and spice and EVERYTHING nice after all.

Hear those silver bells? It’s a void master INCOMING!!!

Applying states for the void state:

(Here you go! 💋💌💋💌)

And everyone knows the biggest present comes in the smallest box………not so difficult after all.

Then there are those boxes you are SO glad you opened.

“Challenges” to apply:

EVERYONE knows that there’s no such thing as a “challenge”.

“Take one It Girl on a pedestal. Add a crowd eager to see her fall. And give them the means to knock her down. So sad how they know they’ll only be the ones who end up falling” - XoXo Gossip Girl

Is Queen B Feeling frustrated? : (Lotusmi’s void challenge)

Always finding your hands in your hair and your fist in the wall? Well this one’s for you! (💋 💋 💋)

Love complaining? Of course you do! Talk about a Blair Bitch Project.

And for the building to really blow up, all you need is an unexpected turn. Who knew changing attitudes were so helpful?Especially for the Stubborn Blair Waldorf.

Desperately Seeking Serena: (3 day void challenge)

Is Queen S feeling like she needs a whole mind reprogramming in a gorgeously short amount of time? Well it’s time to turn that mental frown, upside down! (Here you go!!! 💋♥️💋♥️)

Ah, what’s that magic word again? Oh, Consistency! Whoops! Don’t tell me you forgot too?

And anyone who’s used to bending the rules will find themselves breaking them.

Feeling like a Dare Devil?: (Void Princess challenge)

Confidence is built, and NEWS FLASH!!! You don’t need confidence to build it. No expense is spared.

(Post is here 💋💋💋)

There’s nothing Gossip Girl loves more than a little……push. Not off of a building of course………ofcourse.

Of course Gossip Girl here isn’t going to link every single void challenge here. Wouldn’t you like to come up with your own? Use your favourite one to your hearts content.

As we all know, there’s nothing Gossip Girl loves more than a surprise.

Is that a smile we see on B’s lips? The spotlight’s on her for once and no one helped her get it. I guess “miracles” can happen.

Distraction Method (made by the one and only, Gossip Girl)

Another stray thought lands in B’s lap. Will she use it as ammunition or will she surrender and put down her arms?

Here you go! 💌♥️💌♥️

What happens if Queen B doesn’t want to persist?

No, that’s not a tear in my eye. It’s just allergies. Without you, I’m nothing. —Gossip Girl

Who doesn’t love a five-finger discount. Especially if it’s the middle one.

Look who doesn’t want to end up on my blog. Who will I gossip about now?

Who cares if i’m pretty if i fail my finals?

Everyone knows that Blair Waldorf is SO much better than Rory Gilmore. Luckily for Blair, the word “failing” is unheard of. Too bad for Rory, it’s all she thinks about.

Read this 💋💋💋

Hey Upper East Siders. We hear that World War III just broke out. And it’s wearing kneesocks. Choose your side or run and hide. We have a feeling this one’s to the death.

Why should I listen to Gossip Girl?

Because “I was a teenage drug addict” is not exactly a winning college essay.

Now have a holly jolly Christmas with your every desire. You can thank me later.

Every happy ending is just a new beginning. Because on the Upper East Side, the good times ALWAYS last forever. You know you love me, XOXO —Gossip Girl 💋 💌

[windvexer]

This is kind of a large question so I apologize but I guess I'm curious on how you're able to get such specific or like. unique (i mean this in a good way) answers from tarot? Like your "what magic should i learn next" stuff or how to pick up what a spirit can do through tarot. like idk how to translate these cards into what the spirit is trying to say

Hi!

There's no easy answer to this question, partially because I've now been reading tarot for almost exactly 16 years. This isn't at all to say that it's just the passage of time, but that in that amount of time I've done tons and tons of different things to expand my understanding of, and usage, of tarot.

Tarot didn't come to me very easily, and part of that journey was doing a lot of experimentation in an effort to figure it all out. My reading practice is still very much typified by a huge amount of experimentation and custom reading methods.

It hasn't been a linear process at all. I go through periods of months (or more!) where tarot just doesn't click for me, at all. So just because I picked up my first tarot deck 16 years ago doesn't mean that I've kept a consistent practice (I'm just now getting back into it after just such a fallow period ^-^)

My feelings on experimentation is that it gives me new ways to think about not only the cards, but also spreads, methodologies, and readings as a whole.

In addition, my experiments with other forms of divination (most especially casting lots, energy readings, and playing card readings) have heavily influenced my tarot readings.

Here is a post I wrote that I think expresses my feelings on experimenting within tarot.

Here are some examples of tarot experiments I've performed, and/or methodologies I've explored. It's these sorts of things that have been building blocks in my abilities in tarot. But no single one of them was a "key."

Elemental dignities: The elements of the cards dictates how they interact with each other. Air + fire can mean a supercharged firestorm, but water + fire can mean a controlled fire under a stewpot, or blocked progress of the fire. This experiment helps with understanding how cards can link together, and how energy can flow within a spread.

Elemental landscapes: Spreads are laid down in lines or grids and each card represents one aspect of the landscape. You must brainstorm and choose your own meanings. E.g., 8/wands is an exploding volcano. Queen/Cups is a lake inhabited by mermaids. Read the flow of weather patterns and energies through the spread as an answer to the question. This experiment helps with intuitive reading and working with a spread as a whole, instead of focusing on individual cards.

Elemental portents: Assign an element to your question. Draw a card. If the element on the card agrees with the element of your question, the portent is good; if it disagrees, the portent is bad. This experiment helps with learning how to phrase questions and how the question themselves can influence the balance of the deck.

Astral landscapes: This was an elaborate system I built around the Wooden Tarot. I worked with each card to assign it a mystical association that could occur in an astral landscape. The major arcana were spirits who could travel across the landscape. Each spread was like a playing board of a generated landscape and the spirits that interacted inside of it. This experiment was fun for considering the metaphysical ramifications of the energies of the cards themselves.

Numerical virtues: The number value of the card indicates its power and magnitude in the spread. 2 and 3 value cards are always of smaller power and significance. 10 and court cards are always of higher value. Aces may be high or low. This experiment gave me a new way of thinking about importance of each card, and how to blend magnitudes of significance.

Infinite directional wheel: I wrote a post on this actually, but basically you can keep placing cards forever in the cross-quarter positions. It's a meditation on the concept of elements and directions within witchcraft. Also, an extremely useful spread. This was a vital experiment for me in understanding spreadwork, flow of information, and linking cards.

Card doubling and tripling: Place two (or 3) cards together and determine the meaning as if it's one single card; there is no border, and the images combine with each other. The pictures and meanings of each combine into a single card.

Card doubling and tripling, but in spreads: For each position in the spread, place two cards (or three cards!) in place of one. Read the dyads or triads as if they are a single card. It isn't beginning/middle/end; it's a single triple-complex card! These doubling experiments helped me with the concept of card linking and blending meanings into unique interpretations.

Custom meaning sets: Basically, swap out all the default meanings with your own. Extremely useful IMO in learning how sets of meanings work together, and how to balance sets of meanings. I wrote a post on it here. These experiments have perhaps been the most vital for me in developing new interpretations. I believe that the magical skills readings you referenced were the result of custom meaning sets.

No meaning sets: Instead of using any card meanings, all spreads are resolved using a combination of elemental portents and numerical virtues. I.e., the element and number of a card in relation to other cards in the spread determines the reading. Here, the experimentation is allowing the cards to have strict, defined roles within a spread that can't be overwritten by personal intuition.

As a final note, I highly, highly recommend recording every reading you do and every card you draw. For the first couple years of my practice I recorded all readings, and it was a huge boost to my learning.

[multidimensionalguidance]

Jupiter-Uranus 2024 (The Big Zap)

I noticed this very interesting planetary force that will be coming together and will be felt specifically from February till end of May 2024.

It’s something that only occurs every 14 years, and paying attention to how this will affect in a collective and an individual level during this time could be beneficial.

Jupiter bring expansion and Uranus gives it a sudden “oomph” or energy force making it even more noticeable. As sudden and bright as lightning, and perhaps as loud as thunder. It comes with major spiritual AND technological changes to the entire collective that will trickle down to all of us in some way.

For a lot of people this might be the “lottery ticket” or sudden activation that will lead them to a very significant event, and for some others it will be the sudden realization that will lead them to upgrading a certain aspect of their lives. As if it was a necessary calibration or adjustment.

It is important to have the correct focus and to be in alignment to enjoy the more positive effects, and its not to say that if you are not aligned to your path it will be terrible, but its like the universe will push you towards doing so which might not necessarily be pleasant.

Here are some briefs explanations of how this conjunction will play out depending on where it will be sitting in your natal chart:

1H ➡️ sudden changes or expansion in your desires, environment, physical appearance, health, mannerism, outlook towards life, personality, and self-interests.

2H ➡️ sudden changes or expansion in your resources, finances (gain or expenses), security, freedom, and perhaps necessity to become more vocal/expressive.

3H ➡️ sudden changes or expansion in your hobbies, skills, vehicles (for good or bad so be weary), communication through technology, gossip (towards your or you towards others), reading, academic duties, short traveling (meaning within your country or outside but for a fixed amount of time), and overall your mindset.

4H ➡️ sudden changes or expansion in your home (meaning moving to a different one or something radical occurring within it), shocking family news, in your emotions, real estate from homeland, wealth from parents, and mothers health could improve for the better or the opposite if there are underlying conditions that have not been treated.

5H ➡️ sudden changes or expansion in your creative expression (hobbies as well), friends, romantic life/love affairs (won’t necessarily be long term), motherhood (getting pregnant 👀), feeling the urge to take more risks (like gambling or market stock), overall lots of fun/joy that could lead to overindulgence so be mindful.

6H ➡️ sudden changes or expansion in your daily routine (adding more technology day to day or it breaking down), in healthcare, in exercising, in work (workaholic vibes or changes in employment), cooking (doing so more or having accidents in it), healing, getting a new pet, employees (if you have a company).

7H ➡️ sudden changes or expansion in your agreements (contracts), partnerships of all kinds (beginning of one or change in status if you are in one already), one-one businesses, perception of others, and overall interpersonal style.

8H ➡️ sudden changes or expansion in your finances (particularly savings or income you get from others as gifts of some sort), occult practices you’re interested in, perceptions of your sexual energy, psychic experiences, partners family, and overall major transformations that will help you integrate more your dark/toxic traits. an opportunity to reinvent yourself.

9H ➡️ sudden changes or expansion in your beliefs/religious/spiritual systems, opportunities of settling abroad (permanently or just a long journey), high education (getting more educated in a subject through an institution), fathers health, or abilities to predict future events.

10H ➡️ sudden changes or expansion in your career/profession, public perception (getting more noticed for good or bad), finances (money earned from work), ambitions, worldly perception, and anything related to the relationship you have with your superiors.

11H ➡️ sudden changes or expansion in your social circle (close friends and acquaintances), ambitions/aspirations for the future, memberships you pay of any sort, finances (return from investments, business income, or anything that affects money long term), social media presence, and overall your hopes or wishes might take a sharp turn to align you where you are meant to be.

12H ➡️ sudden changes or expansion in your finances (loss of money or increase in expenses), opportunities to travel abroad, hidden affairs, spirituality, self limitations, karmic responsibilities, and possibilities of working through your blind spots.

If you want to take it a few steps further, take a look at where the lord of that house is sitting at, and it will give interesting details to the grand picture.

Example:

Jupiter-Uranus conj sitting in 2nd house of resources and finances

Lord (planet ruler) of 2nd house is sitting in 9th house of foreign travel, luck, growth, beliefs

There will be sudden financial changes or expansion of their resources in relation to foreign matters, education overseas, father, ideologies, spiritual growth, traveling, etc

Please keep in mind these topics will manifest differently depending on the natal planets or angles in your chart it might touch as well.

[cheynovak]

A new addiction - Part 9   

Jensen Ackles x F/reader (Y/N)    

Warning: 18+, soft smut, age difference, Open relationship    

Side note: English isn’t my first language.    

Let's make it very clear I don't want to denigrate, break up or talk bad about Danneel, their relationship or family. I love them and wish both all the happiness.    

This story is pure fiction. Have fun!    

-- Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 – Part 6 - Part 7 - Part 8 --

Story recap:  

Jensen and Danneel are going through a difficult time in their relationship. After being together for so long and married for 14 years the excitement and sexual tension is gone. After going to marriage counselling Danneel had the idea of trying a semi-open relationship.   

Who will Jensen choose, Danneel or Y/N? Whose heart will he break? 

-- 

As Jensen stirred from his slumber, feeling the bed beside him is empty but still warm. Remembering they shared the night in each others embrace, feeling safe, knowing this was where they belong without saying a word.

With a contented sigh, he rose from the bed as he made his way to the kitchen, where the aroma of breakfast greeted him like an old friend, mingling with the sound of sizzling bacon and the clinking of plates.  

As Y/N moved in the kitchen with effortless grace, her hair still messy and a soft smile on her lips, Jensen felt a swell of affection welling up within him. He crossed the room, his arms wrapping her waist as he pressed a tender kiss to her shoulder. 

"Good morning," he murmured, his lips a gentle caress against her skin. Y/N leaned back into his embrace, her body moulding against his. "Good morning, sleepyhead," she teased, her voice laced with affection. 

As they stood there, wrapped in each other's arms, Jensen felt the weight of his heart pressing against his chest, the words he had longed to say bubbling up within him like a wellspring of emotion. With a steadying breath, he summoned the courage to voice the question that had lingered in the depths of his soul. 

"Are you ready for this, Y/N?" Jensen asked, his voice soft yet filled with conviction. "Are you ready for us, an item, for real?" Y/N smiles turning in his arms. Her arms around his neck. “The question is, are you ready Mr. Ackles?” He smiled and kissed her lips. “I am.”  

Y/N looked at Jensen with a glint of adventure sparkling in her eyes. "Hey, now that the kids aren't with you for a couple of weeks, why don't we go on a small vacation?" 

Jensen's brows furrowed in surprise at Y/N's suggestion, the idea taking root in his mind like a seed planted in fertile soil. The thought of a spontaneous adventure with Y/N filled him with a sense of exhilaration, a welcome distraction from the weight of his own uncertainties. 

"A vacation?" Jensen echoed, his voice tinged with excitement. "Where would we go?" Y/N's smile widened as she painted a vivid picture. "We could explore the countryside, visit cute little towns, maybe even camp under the stars," she suggested, her eyes alight with anticipation. 

-- 

The miles unfurled beneath the wheels of their car, each passing moment filled adventure and discovery. With the wind in their hair and the open road stretching out before them, no car insight, they felt a sense of freedom wash over them.  

As they drove, Jensen found himself swept up in the rhythm of the road with the music playing softly in the background, he began to sing along, his voice filling the car with a sense of joy.  

Y/N's eyes dancing with delight as she captured the moment with her camera, each click of the shutter immortalizing their journey in vibrant snapshots him. Jensen glanced over at Y/N, a smile tugging at the corners of his lips.  

He couldn't help but feel a sense of gratitude wash over him, a deep appreciation for the beauty of the world and the preciousness of the moments they shared together. 

Jensen's hand found their way to Y/N's bare legs, the warmth of her skin beneath his touch sending a shiver of electricity coursing through him. His fingers traced gentle patterns along her thigh, a silent declaration of his desire and affection. 

Y/N's breath hitched at the sensation, her heart racing in tandem with the rhythm of the road. She turned to look at Jensen, her eyes meeting his with a mixture of anticipation and longing, the air between them heavy with unspoken desire.  

Y/N's heart fluttered with excitement as she turned to Jensen, with a playful smile tugging at the corners of her lips, she mirrored his gesture, placing her hands on his legs and giving him a teasing squeeze. 

Jensen's breath caught in his throat at the unexpected sensation, a rush of warmth flooding through him at the intimate contact. He met Y/N's gaze, eyes sparkling with amusement, she undid his belt her hand slipping in between his skin and pants.  

Y/N's touch sent an electric jolt coursing through Jensen's veins, making it difficult for him to focus on anything else but the warmth of her hands. With each gentle squeeze and teasing caress, she ignited a fire within him, her playful touch stirring up a storm of desire that threatened to consume him whole. 

His grip tightening on the steering wheel as he fought to keep his attention on the road ahead. "Y/N," Jensen managed to choke out, his voice strained with effort. "You're making it... hard to drive." 

Y/N's laughter filled the air, a melodic sound that danced on the wind like a symphony of joy. "Sorry," she teased, her voice laced with amusement. "I can't help myself." Y/N moved closer “I need to feel you.” she whispered in his ear. Jensen parked the car, his hand moved to her shoulders, pulling her in.  

“Na-ah. You’ll have to wait till we’re at the cabin.” She looked out the window “I think we should grab some groceries before we check in," Y/N suggested, kissing his cheek and hopping out the car.  

Jensen's brows furrowed in confusion, a hint of frustration creeping into his voice. "Groceries?" he echoed, his mind already wandering to the comforts of their room and the intimacy they would share. "Can't it wait? I was hoping for some... alone time." 

As they strolled through the aisles of the grocery store, Jensen couldn't resist the opportunity, with a mischievous twinkle in his eye, he sidled up to Y/N, his lips quirking into a sly grin. "So, what's on the menu for tonight?" Jensen teased, his hands caressing her back.  

Her lips curving into a playful smile. "Oh, you know, just the usual," she replied, her tone tinged with amusement. "A little of this, a little of that...” she whispered against his lip before she bit his lips soft driving him insane.  

As Jensen and Y/N stepped into the cozy cabin, the warmth of the hearth enveloping them like a comforting embrace, Jensen found himself unable to resist the magnetic pull of desire. “Where are you going?” Asked noticing Y/N walking straight ahead.  

As Y/N's silhouette moved gracefully towards the private lake behind the porch, a seductive sway in her hips, losing her clothing. Jensen couldn't tear his gaze away. She moved with a sensuality that left him breathless, her every step a silent invitation to join her in the cool embrace of the water.  

Unable to resist any longer, his movements slow and deliberate as he followed Y/N towards the water's edge. Without a word, they stepped into the water together, the cool liquid enveloping them in its embrace as they moved as one. Their bodies pressed together, skin against skin, as they lost themselves in the intoxicating rhythm of the night. Teasing him, seeing how long he can contain his needs.  

Y/N wrapped her legs around him, feeling his excitement rubbing against her core. Their bodies moving together in a dance of desire that knew no bounds. He buried his face in the crook of her neck, trailing kisses along her jawline and down her throat as he lost himself in the intoxicating scent of her skin.  

Unable to contain himself any longer, Jensen lifted her out of the water, his hands reaching out to trace the curve of Y/N's waist with a touch that was both tender and urgent as they walk back inside. His fingers tingled with a longing that bordered on desperation as he pulled her closer, his lips seeking hers with a hunger that consumed him whole. 

With a soft sigh, Y/N melted into Jensen's embrace, her body moulding against his with a perfect fit as they sank into the cushions of the sofa. Their hands roamed freely, tracing the contours of each other's bodies. 

As their bodies entwined in the throes of passion, Jensen's voice dropped to a husky whisper, his words laced with desire and longing. "I want you, Y/N," he murmured, his breath hot against her ear as he pressed his lips to the sensitive skin of her neck. "I want to feel every inch of you, to lose myself in the heat of your skin." 

"I want to taste you," Jensen growled, his voice low and guttural with need. "To make you scream my name as I drive you to the edge and back again." 

Y/N's breath caught in her throat when his lips moved over her body down to her heated core, her body quivering with anticipation as she surrendered to the intoxicating rhythm of Jensen tongue. With a soft whimper, she arched into his touch, her fingers tangling in his hair as she pulled him closer.  

"I want you to make me yours in every way possible, Jensen.” she whispered, this seductive promise made him move back up claiming her lips in a searing kiss.  "I need to hear you beg for more," he murmured, his voice a seductive rumble as he whispered sweet promises against her earlobe. "To feel your nails dig into my skin.’  

"Jensen," she pleaded, her voice a soft, breathless whisper against his skin. "Please... I need you." "That’s it baby, tell me what you want." Jensen commanded, his voice a low, velvety growl that sent shivers down her spine. "Beg for it."  

"Please, Jensen," she pleaded, her voice a soft, desperate whisper. "I need you... I need you to take me... take hard.” With a primal need driving him, Jensen's movements became more urgent, his thrusts growing harder and more insistent with each passing moment.  

Y/N's gasps filled the air, each one a symphony of pleasure and ecstasy as Jensen's movements pushed her closer and closer to the edge. Her nails dug into his skin, leaving faint marks in their wake as she surrendered herself completely to the heady rush of sensation. 

Jensen's movements grew more possessive, his hands gripping Y/N's wrists firmly as he held her arms above her head. His touch was both commanding and tender, a silent declaration of his desire to possess her completely. 

Jensen's lips crashed against hers in a searing kiss. "Is this what you need, Y/N?" he asked, his voice a low, husky whisper that sent shivers down her spine. "Tell me, is this what you want?" They lock eyes. "Yes" she breathed, her voice barely above a whisper. "This is exactly what I need."  

Jensen's movements became more frenzied, his need for release driving him to push Y/N higher and higher until she felt herself spiralling towards the edge. With each thrust, each exquisite moment of connection, they drew closer to the pinnacle of their pleasure. 

Y/N's breath came in ragged gasps, her heart pounding in her chest as she felt herself hurtling towards the brink of ecstasy. With a fierce longing, she arched into Jensen's touch, her nails digging into his skin once more as she surrendered herself completely to the heady rush of sensation. 

And then, in a moment of exquisite release, they tumbled over the edge together, their bodies wracked with pleasure as they soared to dizzying heights of ecstasy. In that moment, there was nothing else in the world but the two of them.  

Y/N gently brushed a stray lock of hair from her forehead, her chest rising and falling with the rhythm of her heartbeat. She looked up at Jensen, her eyes reflecting the depth of her emotions. 

"That... that was amazing," she murmured. Jensen's lips curled into a tender smile as he brushed a gentle kiss against her forehead, his touch tender and reassuring. "You liked it?" he asked softly, his voice filled with warmth. Y/N nodded, a soft blush spreading across her cheeks. "I more than liked it," she confessed. "It was... incredible." 

“We should get ready for dinner. It's getting late." he said, kissing her soft. She nodded but let him wander off to the bathroom alone. He re-entered the room, his gaze fell upon the sight that awaited him on the porch. There stood Y/N, bathed in the soft glow of the moonlight, wearing nothing but his shirt and a pair of panties. Her silhouette was illuminated against the night sky. Leaving him breathless once more. 

Y/N looked at his with a soft smile, Jensen's arms wrap around her from behind, she lets out a soft gasp, the unexpected touch sending a shiver of pleasure coursing through her body. She leaned back into his embrace, revelling in the warmth of his body pressed against hers. 

Jensen held her close, his touch gentle yet possessive as he buried his face in the crook of her neck. His beard tickled her skin. “Let’s stay here.” she said. "we’ll order something to eat and make love under the stars?”  "I want nothing more." he confessed softly. 

As the night sky stretched out above them, dotted with countless stars, they made their way back to the porch, a blanket spread out beneath them. They lay side by side, their fingers intertwined as they gazed up at the heavens above. 

As they lay together, basking in the afterglow. Jensen's heart swelled with a newfound sense of certainty and purpose. "Y/N," he began, his voice filled with sincerity. "I know this might be sudden, but... why don’t we move in together? Let’s find our happy place.”  

“I’d love to” Y/N said kissing his lips. Their kisses grew more urgent, Y/N moaned softly against his lips, her fingers tangling in his hair as she pulled him closer, her body arching against his in a silent plea for more. With a growl of need to feel her closer, Jensen lifted Y/N into his arms.  

Addicted to feel every inch of skin against skin. They were lost in each other, In the moonlight, their bodies moved as one, in a search for the waves of pleasure once more.  

As they lay in each other's arms, their hearts pounding in unison, they knew that this was just the beginning of their journey together, a journey filled with passion, intimacy, and a love that would burn brighter with each passing day.  

And as they drifted off to sleep, wrapped in the warmth of their embrace, they knew that they had found something special.  

Something addicted.  

--  

What do we think. Are we happy with this ending?  

Please feel free to like, share or comment. Make sure you check out my masterlist.    

--    

Tags:   

@mayafatimakhan @anundyingfidelity 

[donna-rinascimentale]

hiya! hope you doing well.

would you elaborate on the interpretation you were talking about in your Labyrinth post tags? what you said was really interesting and I never thought about it that way! 👀

also, hope you had fun watching! ✨✨✨

certainly.

i’d always been subscribed to the interpretation that the labyrinth is a metaphor for navigating coming of age, that the end of sarah’s hero’s journey is a means of balancing adult maturity with never losing a child’s sense of wonder and imagination. the fandom has thought up tons of explanations for where jareth falls in this scenario. is he a tangible antagonist, actively trying to get sarah to slip back into her old childish ways? a metaphor for adulthood, all that sarah is and isn’t ready for?

i think he’s all sarah’s creation. so does jim henson.

“He represents a lot of things that are a part of Sarah's world, what she's trying to figure out and what she's going through. … [Jareth] has no reality except what Sarah gives him, which she can constantly change.”

sarah seems to be very genre-savvy. she reads lines from a play titled the labyrinth, and she recognizes the puzzle of the two guards and implies she’s practiced it before in case she’d happen to encounter it. here, the labyrinth is a product of sarah’s fantasy, by which she navigates her adolescence and her parents’ divorce and her perceived lack of autonomy in a manner typical of a seasoned fantasy reader.

sarah is well aware that every fantasy hero needs a villain. the likeness she gives hers is that of her mother’s costar—as the former mrs. williams is a stage actress, shown in the photo on sarah’s vanity of her posing with a fellow actor who looks just like this jareth. sarah made jareth, made him as beautiful and dangerous as she believed he should be.

sarah made jareth.

to jareth, god is a sixteen-year-old girl.

imagine god, calling you by name, crowning you a king and giving you beauty and power. you were quite literally born for this. all you know is this role, building yourself and your kingdom just the way god wishes it.

then, god turns herself away from you.

you may feel betrayed. hollow, like you’ve been stripped of everything that makes you you. “you made me this way,” you might say.

Everything! Everything that you wanted, I have done. You ask the child to be taken, I took him. You cowered before me, I was frightening. I have reordered time, I have turned the world upside down, and I have done it all for you.

“i was playing the role you put me in. what was i made for, if not you?

i can’t live within you.”

Just fear me, love me, do as I say

“let me play the role of villain, the role you made me to fill.”

and I would be your slave.

“your will be done.”

god is a sixteen-year-old girl who hasn’t yet figured out the way she wants to be worshipped. it’s a heavy burden, trying to satisfy someone who doesn’t know what she wants.

but there is hope for jareth.

fandom rarely debates on how to interpret the barn owl at the beginning of the film. we’re pretty much in consensus that it’s a manifestation of jareth, but that’s never given much thought.

when sarah asserts her power and escapes the labyrinth, jareth has once again taken the form of the owl. in the final scene, when sarah celebrates with her friends from the labyrinth, reconciling her love of fantasy with her maturity and self-growth, jareth flies away, smaller and smaller until he’s gone. here we turn to the age-old metaphor of flight as freedom.

in moving away from escapism and becoming an active participant in her own life, sarah has freed jareth from the role of villain. none of the friends in her room are human. be reminded again that jareth bears the likeness of a man present (at least tangentially) in sarah’s real life, who would likely feel disheartened knowing he’s blamed for something beyond his control.

because sarah has no more need for a jareth, there is no more jareth. and that’s arguably best for both of them.

(p.s.: i go to the theater tomorrow! i have a sarah-esque outfit put together and everything. thanks for wishing me well & know tomorrow can’t come soon enough for me… this film has been among my favorites for many many many years and each watch makes me find more to love. best cult i’ve ever joined)

[thedarkestnight-if]

The Blood of our Fallen will stain the future of your Pack.

It will scorch the one you need to save you. Tearing away the very essence of what connects you to Selene.

For we will be avenged…

This… I swear.

It had been a threat, a promise, that had darkened the life of your Pack for years, but when nothing came of it the worry faded away. It became nothing more than a myth, a legend, to scare unruly pups at night.

After all, who could imagine a werewolf without their lupine spirit? It was inconceivable.

Until the promise became all too real for you, on the eve of your 25th birthday, when you couldn’t shift during your Ceremony; an event that would destine you to become the next Alpha of your Pack.

Sending you on a journey that you never imagined yourself being part of. Will you be able to find the answers to your Curse?

Or will everything end in bloodshed like it had all those years before?

This story is rated 18+ (Mature) so please interact with this story at your own discretion. As it depicts various things such as blood, violence, mentions of past torture, sexual themes, profanity, blood feuds, alcohol consumption, darker themes, and more will be added as the story continues.

This story is mainly a romance one with adventure/action/fantasy strewn in.

DEMO (TBA)

Play as a Werewolf!MC that doesn’t have the ability to shift, but has been able to keep some things that make them lupine in nature. Like agility, speed, and strength. Even if those abilities are waning by the day.

Customizable MC: name, gender, sexuality, appearance, and a smattering of other things.

Meet interesting characters as you hunt down the answers to your Curse. Will you be able to succeed?

Have visions of a Goddess.

Hopefully stop another war from erupting.

Romance 1 of 4 options. From your protective best friend to the abrasive mage.

Remember to have fun!

Apollo — M, 25 Years Old, Scorpio.

A lone wolf that you come across— along with his sister— within the forest that you know that you’d get lost in. A place, commonly referred to as The Outlands, that not many have returned from. With a warm smile, gentle heart, and calm demeanor, Apollo is the polar opposite to his sister. Though he does listen to whatever she commands of him. Will you be able to find something more with the lone wolf?

Appearance: Apollo stands at around 6’5” with crystalline green eyes— with streaks of gold strewn throughout. Dark brown hair, with highlights of gold, falls across his forehead in loose curls that his sister always ruffles. His tanned skin causes the brightness of his smile, and the sparkle within his eyes, to stand out that much more. He has a muscular body of a seasoned warrior.

Lupine Appearance: His appearance is similar to that of a gigantic wolf. Dark brown fur, with golden highlights, cause the crystalline green of his eyes to shine that much more. With a muscular physique his lupine form definitely doesn’t look like one you’d want to contend with.

Personality: He’s a warm hearted individual that only wants the best for everyone. He isn’t as jaded as his older sister— probably because he doesn’t remember as much as her— but he’d do absolutely anything for her. He’s more than happy to help you on your journey.

Artemis — F, 28 Years Old, Capricorn.

The other lone wolf that you meet that isn’t as friendly as her darling brother. With an icy glare, aloof disposition, and inability to trust you at first, she’s definitely not going to be an easy person to get close too, but you know that she and her brother know the forests you have to traverse better than anyone. Will you ever be able to heal the scars that have left cracks in her heart?

Appearance: Artemis stands at around 6’3” with crystalline blue eyes— with streaks of silver strewn throughout. Her golden white hair falls to the small of her back in a cascade of soft curls and waves. Her fair skin, only slightly tanned by the sun, was completely unblemished despite the hard life she has seemingly led. Her muscular body still held a lithe air that makes her more agile than her brother.

Lupine Appearance: Her appearance is similar to that of a gigantic wolf. Shimmering golden white fur is offset by the brilliance of her crystalline blue eyes. You don’t think you’ve ever seen a wolf as quick/agile as her.

Personality: She’s aloof towards you. While not being necessarily unkind, she’s definitely not what you’d consider welcoming. Her ire only seems to soften for her brother, which brings out the gentle heart that’s been hurt too much.

Grayson/Grace — M/F, 26 Years Old, Leo.

Your best friend in the entire world. You’ve known them since you were both Pups, when you had gotten pushed into a mud puddle and they went off on the much older boy that had done it. You’ve never met anyone as noble and gallant as G. They take their training as a Guard to the Royal Family seriously, which makes them even more protective of you. It wasn’t a surprise when they were the first person to volunteer after your quest was made known.

Appearance: They stand at around 6’1” with expressive hazel eyes: the most brilliant shades of greens melding with shimmering gold. Light brown skin cause the loose onyx black curls to stand out that much more. They have an athletic body from years of training.

Lupine Appearance: They’re lupine form is a massive bipedal beast— that’s common among the Guard. Onyx black fur, that’s thick and coarse to not allow easy penetration, is only offset by the gentleness of their sparkling hazel eyes.

Personality: They’re a very kind and generous person to those that they trust. No one being above you in that regard (and their little siblings). They just want what’s best for everyone in the pack and will make sure that happens. No matter the cost. They do not get along with Noah/Nora.

Noah/Nora — M/F, 27 Years Old, Cancer.

A member of the very Clan that your Pack had gone to war with so long ago. The very Creators of the Curse that now plagues you. With bad blood going back centuries, you aren’t sure if they’ll help you, but it seems like their Elders have something else in mind. Causing you to have a very put out, and sarcastic, mage along for the ride as you journey on to find out what was wrong with you. Will you ever be able to get passed the prickly exterior of theirs? Or will bad blood always stay that way?

Appearance: They stand at around 5’11” with midnight black hair. Silvery gold eyes— like the sun and moon meeting— causes the warm bronze tone of their skin to stand out that much more. You’ve never seen them smile, at least when it’s directed at you, but you’re certain it’d make their eyes brighten that much more. They have a slenderly lithe body.

Feline Appearance: You’ve only heard tales about their Clans abilities, but to see the giant cat that stood before you? Reminiscent of large panther, midnight black fur allows them to blend into any shadow. Only their golden-silver eyes shimmering within the expanse of darkness gives them away.

Personality: Noah/Nora is fairly brash/abrasive when it comes to you. They won’t hold back, no matter if it hurts your feelings, and they’ll definitely make it known that they wish they didn’t have to be part of this adventure. If you end up getting closer to them? Maybe you’ll start to see the gentle side of them come out more and more.

ART BREEDER PORTRAITS

[bethaven]

#22 Heartstopper

Plot: Nick and Charlie get placed together at form in school and immediately - sparks. Charlie's unsure if Nick likes him back, or even if he's non-straight. Nick on the other hand, get very confused about these new feelings. Meeting, falling in love and being out turns out to be more complicated than they could've ever imagined. But it's the love story of the century and together with supportive friends and family they can overcome anything. We also get to follow their friends and family in their own endeavours, like the relationships between Tao and Elle and Tara and Darcy as well as Isaac's ace-journey.

Years: 2022-

Seasons: 2 (season three arriving in 2024)

My story: There's so much to say here, but I'll try to keep it short. I discovered Heartstopper shortly after the first season had arrived to Netflix. It fast became one of my favourites and led to a few rewatches over the first year. But I didn't move further into the fandom just yet. When season 2 dropped I'd been longing for it all summer. I'd had a rough year with chaos at work combined with both my grandfathers passing away within two months. I'd been keeping myself distracted with travelling all summer, but then suddenly there were no distractions left. My mental health spiraled. The only thing that kept me afloat was Heartstopper. I watched all episodes everyday for about two months. I read the comics over and over. I went deep into the Osemanverse and I read books, which I normally never do. I got into tumblr. All of it kind of became my saving. And I owe it all to Alice Oseman.

Teachable moments: For me Heartstopper teaches us primarily about how love is always just love, in whichever form it comes in. Wheither it's platonic, romantic or other types of love, wheither it's the love you feel for your partner or the love you feel for friends and family - they're all valid and important.

Best character: Even though I love them all, I've always had a soft spot for Charlie. There's so many layers of him and I am really looking forward to how the rest of his journey will be portrayed on screen. He has the biggest heart and is so much stronger than he thinks.

Best episode: "Boyfriend" (S1E8). I love how this episode start at the deep end and ends on a high note. Nick's speach and their kiss in the corridor together with the beach trip just makes this perfect. A big runner up is "Truth/Dare" (S2E6), not the least for Tara and Darcy's story and growth.

Best quote: "I think there's this idea that when you're not straight you have to tell all your friends and family immediately, like you owe it to them. But you don't." (Charlie to Nick) This line has really helped me in my own journey about sexuality/attractions.

Fun fact: It'd be hard to find a fun fact that the Heartstopper fandom didn't already know (even though it might be true for all the series in this calendar). But for the not so initiated it'd be fun to know that Joe Locke, who plays Charlie, got the role through an open audition and this is his first time acting professionally. In 2024 he'll be both in a new Marvel series (which, in a parallel universe is quite funny since Charlie doesn't like Marvel) and do his Broadway debut in Sweeny Todd.

If you like this you might also like: Young Royals, Skins, Tales of the City, Skam and Atypical.

(Heartstopper is the adaptation of Alice Oseman's webcomic and books. Volume 5 was just released and volume 6 will be the last one. The webcomic is normally released three times a month, but will now be on a hiatus for about six months, until Alice have some volume 6 stuff to share. Also check out the novellas Nick and Charlie and This winter as well as Alice's novels Solitaire (where the story about Nick and Charlie started), Radio Silence, I was born for this and Loveless. She has also written and created the Netflix series.)

[joeyquinndrabz]

That’s my girl- Joseph Quinn X Reader

TW: N/A

AN: My dad surprised me with paramore tickets for their Manchester show KICKING AND SCREAMING!! Character very much inspired by the goddess herself, Hayley Williams. Character sings “still into you and ain’t it fun” (I’m not a basic fan before anyone attacks be i just wanted to use songs people would know ltfb and figure 8 are favourite songs atm🥲)

y/b/n- your bands name

“On stage in 5,4,3-“ The screams from outside were deafening, people had come from far and wide to see your band perform. This included your own family and friends, it was a big event in your career. Your band had been offered to perform at Hyde Park and seeing you were all from London, it made perfect sense to finish your worldwide tour where you felt the happiest, home.

Tickets sold out within a minute, people had fought for their tickets and you were determined to make it the best show possible for them. You’d been in the limelight from a very young age, your band found fame at 15 in 2009. Today was the 14th year anniversary of “y/b/n” and this felt like the perfect opportunity to celebrate with the people who got you here.

There was a vip stand full of your family and friends, eagerly waiting to watch you do your thing after not seeing you for so long due to the tour. This included Joe. You’d been on tour for 6 months, thankfully he was in America at the same time or you genuinely think you would’ve gone insane. However, you hadn’t seen him since and hadn’t seen him today because he’d been in Italy hours prior to the concert starting. He’d brought his film camera, determined to get some footage of you in your element. It brought comfort to him when he looked back at them when you were away, in a way it felt as if you were with him even though you were on the other side of the globe.

“1.” The countdown had ended and you all ran on stage, the screams getting louder. Click track in ear and the music beginning to play, you knew it was time to give your all. Singing and dancing around the stage, you looked over at the stands your family were in and saw Joe and Wes going crazy singing along and jumping up and down. You laughed down the mic and had to stop singing for a split second to compose yourself, they noticed and screamed “LOVE YOU” to which you responded with an air kiss and carried on rocking out.

The final bridge appeared. “Baby not a day goes by that I’m not into you.” You pointed over at Joe and he sang it right back at you, grinning from ear to ear. You noticed your dad dancing with your mum and Wes n Chloe screaming the lyrics at each other with pints in their hands. This was home.

Finally the song finished and the whole of Hyde Park was screaming and bellowing your names. You laughed in disbelief and took it all in, the lights and posters, the little groups of people with different journeys with your music. It all finally felt right, you’d been so homesick on tour so you’d found it hard to genuinely appreciate what was happening during shows because your mind and heart were thinking of somewhere else. Here. Home.

You went into your next song, same energy and same reaction from the crown. Pure elation. It felt like a giant party and there was no stopping this one.

Once the second song came to an end, it was time for you to speak to all those people. But this time, you didn’t feel anxious. “Londonnn.” You shouted down the mic which gained a roar from the audience, jumping and waving at you. “We’re home.” You shouted again running around the stage as your guitarist joined you and your drummer smashed his symbols. The audience were wild at this point, screaming all sorts.

“We’ve got a proper party in store for you, you ready to dance Hyde Park?” You asked, pointing your mic to the crowd who were definitely ready. Your eyes drifted to the stands and you saw Joe and your mum in a tight hug, waving at you with admiration plastered on their faces. You sent them a heart with your hands and you performed the rest of your set.

In-between some songs you continued speaking to the crowd, laughing and dancing along with them. You were on a high.

2 hours later the show had come to an end.

“London you have been incredible.” You smiled out to the audience and noticed some tears from a few of them, you were aware your music meant a lot to people but seeing it first hand was a feeling like no other. “Massive thank you to you all, it’s 14 years today of y/b/n and we genuinely would not be here without you, you and especially you.” You’d been pointing and on the last few words of your sentence your finger was aimed at the stands. “Every single one of you up there are the reason we do what we do and I love you all so much.” Joe was tearing up and so was everyone up there with him. “Fucking hell mate shes made it.” Wes laughed with tears in his eyes, giving Joe a side hug as Joe laughed along with tears of his own.

“Writing this album took a lot out of us, we were tired and not the nicest of people because of it.” Your whole band laughed as your bassist played a falling scale to add to the words you’d just spoken. “There were two people in particular who had to take the brunt of my this tiredness and I can’t thank them enough.” You saw them both with tears in their eyes and it seemed to catch on to you like a yawn, your eyes were glazing over.

“I’m not gonna say too much or I’ll cry like a baby, but, Joe, Wes. I love you both so much.” The crown cheered for them and they blew you kisses whilst mouthing their own “I love yous” and with that you started some banter with the crowd to lift the mood again and started your last song. “Ain’t it fun” was truly a feel good tune and the audience were picking up on the frequencies, their bodies danced and sang like never before. Your dad was dancing up and down with Joe, drinks in hand and it was like you had your own personal show. Your guitarist mimicked them and mirrored their dance moves, a beautiful moment with beautiful people.

The last symbol smashed and with that you waved your goodbyes, hugged one and other and ran off stage. You were all on such a high and you couldn’t wait to be in Joes embrace, the butterflies you felt on the first date 8 years ago reappeared.

Your family and friends had been escorted backstage to the pop up bar that management surprised you with as a goodbye your present. Everyone was mingling but you just wanted to see one person and soon you did. His eyes met yours and a massive grin came on both your faces, you ran up to him and his arms outstretched to grab you. “Oh my gosh you were incredible.” Joe whispered into your ear as you both stood in each others embrace, squeezing tighter than you’d ever done before. “I’m sorry I’m so sweaty.” You giggled as he brushed your hair out your face with his two hands with a chuckle. “Sweetheart don’t be silly, you’ve been dancing for nearly 3 hours straight im not expecting you to be dry.” You both laughed, you were disgusting in love but no one cared. They loved it. “Did you like the show?” You asked, anxious of his reaction. “Hated it.” He said, monotone face and he let go of you. You eyebrows furrowed with confusion but confusion didn’t last long, Joe came close again to swing you around, a squeal escaping your lips. “I bloody loved it, I’ve never been so proud of you.” He kissed you firmly on the lips over and over again before holding you close again.

“Sorry to break it up lovebirds but I’d love some time with the rockstar herself.” Wes joked from beside you both, you squealed again in excitement and quickly turned to hug Wes who shook you from side to side. “My beautiful best friend you are INCREDIBLE!.” Wes shouted, earning a hearty chuckle from both you and Joe. “Bring it in brother.” Wes opened up his other arm and soon enough you were in a group hug with the people you loved the most.

You popped your head up from the middle to look up at them both. “Can I have a pint now?” You queried.

“She’s back!” Wes laughed as Joe chuckled into your hair.

[amrass]

RDR2 fanfic recommendations

I began this a month ago, then posted days ago, then realized marking posts as private makes me the only one who's can see them. Huh! So, I repost!

This is a spotlight with a handful of Ao3 RDR2 fanfics I enjoy. I got specific tastes, so this list has lots of Micah, and everything from gen fics to dead doves, randomly ordered. Please consider checking these out and give the writers some love. Chances are you have read a few already, but hey, you might find something new.

My Country has no Borders by Spacehat

You know the rare moment when a fic is so good it satisfies your whole need for a pairing or a character? Whenever I wanna read about Dutch, Hosea, a young Arthur, and Vandermorgan, I read this and boom, satisfaction. Literary level writing, masterful nonlinear time frame, and a spot on character analysis of Dutch. 

Wagers of Sin by Spacehat

The first Morbell fic I read that made me go hallelujah. Power bottom Micah, confident and mischievous, a well endowed and hard ass Arthur. The humor and the smut work so well together, the banter is excellent, and it's less dark than MChnB, for a lighter taste. Many of my Morbell headcanons are from here, so if you like my work, you might like this, though I consider the style better than mine.

The Mule by jenny_of_oldstones

Funny oneshot with crack elements, about a race between Arthur on his trusty mule Rooster vs Micah on Baylock. A very good take on Lenny, intelligent and witty, potentially the future leader of the gang. Arthur is funny and cute. Micah is an asshole, and awful fun. 

Vengeance is Hereby Mine by Delta_Meow

Crossovers do not get the attention they deserve, and this can be read without having seen the Dollars Trilogy (specifically A Few Dollars More, my personal favorite). There are three very strong leads - Arthur, Manco and Mortimer - with interesting relationships between each other, heaps of sexual tension, extensive horse knowledge, action, drama and a little American serial killer folklore! Also Micah owns the chapter he is in - very evil, very nice.

Red Dead Stuart Little AU by SourApplechips

This is a super cute and funny series, containing fics with the "everything is the same except one thing"; Micah is a rat, and John is a squirrel. There is an animated writing style that lends itself well to humor, a good eye for detail, a good grip on action and banter. I still seek these out when I am having a bad day. Also, it is interesting to note the connection between humor and horror, here: the writer masters both, which require a sense of timing and tension.

Here is a trio of dark fics within Morbell pairing, which are short or in their beginning, all ongoing. A lot of people only read complete fics, but supporting a writer in their journey can be so meaningful, so please give these a try: The World by SourApplechips (good take on the horror genre, top notch gore, excellent scenery details), Kindling Play by ohcmonjustdont (mythological, deeply poetic, and damn hot smut) and Idiotic Bull by zzzzzz01 (coiling dialogue and a good mix of violence and sensuality). I will not compare, but will rather point them out within a context of what honestly feels like a renaissance of Micah content. The characters feel like outlaws, the landscape - so clear in the game - is so present but conveyed differently, overall it is nice to see three unique voices emerge around the same time.

Nailed Her Pretty Good by SadomasochismTango

An unusual take on a Micah x random bathing girl fic, written from his perspective as an unreliable narrator with a strong dick game, making this deliciously dubious, but also is an excellent character study of him. This might be the piece on this list where the reader best feels Micah's age. He feels like a confident, creepy, forty year old outlaw. Also, the writer is a confirmed Tom Lehrer fan! Great!!!

Home in Damnation by SadomasochismTango

This is might be the darkest story on this list, so I'm hiding it at the bottom. This contains non-descriptive forced noncon incest in the Bell family, between grandfather and grandson. Still, this is tastefully done, direct but not crude, mixing extreme emotions beautifully. This is my favorite fanfic about Micah because it is so well written. If you can stomach the warnings I cannot recommend this enough.

(PS: If a writer for ever which reason wants me to remove their work from here, I will do it no questions asked and with no bad feelings. I think most authors are okay with being recommended, but it is completely okay not to be!)

[reccyls]

What did you like most about Drake's route? Also how is his relationship with the mansion residents? Since he became a new resident of the mansion. And did he continue to stay?

Let me start with the non-spoilery bits first and then go into more detail beneath the cut.

I really liked how Drake's route handled a bunch of different subplots and how things all tied together. There's a lot happening in his route and although there are some bits where it feels like some abrupt turns have been taken, on the whole, I think that it all fit together pretty well. I also really like Drake as a character, he's fun as well as mysterious, and finding out all the layers as his route progressed was really enjoyable. He might have shot up to become my top favorite in the game.

As for how Drake gets along with everyone at the mansion, aside from a pretty bad first impression (first thing he does once he gets through the door at the mansion is hold the MC at knifepoint), he gets along very well with everyone, and very quickly too. Within 1 or 2 weeks he's already bantering with everyone and has pretty much become a part of regular life. He spars with Jean, pokes fun at Theo's obssession with Vincent, joins Arthur and Dazai in terrorizing Isaac, etc.

And for the spoilery/more in-depth stuf...

So the subplots that get brought up early on and slowly tackled throughout his route are:

Drake's hidden colder side and his trust issues

Additionally, what is it about the new moon and full moon that is special when it comes to him

The MC's own issues, and how that helps to develop her relationship with Drake. By the time Drake's route starts, she's been stranded in the past for a couple of months, and she struggles a lot with genuinely enjoying her life now because of all the people she's become close to and the memories she's made here, as well as also feeling like she is betraying everything she had in the 21st century by feeling that way.

The connection between Drake and Vlad

Drake and Galileo's relationship, and what they're doing and why

A pickpocket girl that MC and Drake run into a lot

The appearance of vampire hunters in Paris

It's a lot of spinning plates and I feel like his route handles them quite well! There's a bit of abruptness here and there, particularly with the vampire hunters and having everything come to a head when Drake shows his true colors (the back quarter of his route feels very loaded with reveals/action), but overall I really liked the way his route was plotted out.

He does not stay at the mansion, however. He pretty thoroughly burns that bridge when he launches an attack on everyone and makes it very clear to everyone that he plans to come after the MC next.

Even after he and the MC fully realize their feelings and work things out between them, he doesn't return. Drake still can't fully let go of his own anger and disgust at the world, so he still plans to journey together with Galileo in order to see the future he wants come to pass. He does make a bet with the MC, though: if he wins and he gets to see the end of the world, he'll come and kidnap her away so they can spend what time they have left together. If she wins and the future is one of peace where vampires and humans can live in harmony, he'll hand everything over to her: his body, his heart, and his life, and he'll come to stay together with her. And after escorting her back to Comte's mansion, that is where they part ways.

In the dramatic end, they spend about a year apart before he shows up in her life again. Galileo ditched him, haha (he seems to be playing matchmaker). But Drake's not having that, and says that he's going to hunt Galileo down and asks the MC to walk that journey alongside him. So the two of them don't stay behind in that ending.

Not sure about romantic, I haven't finished that yet.

[dutchvanwinkle]

Mr Van der Linde Pt. 1 - Dutch x Reader

OK I’m working on like a bagillion things atm but I wanted to get something out before the years end to prove that I’m alive and writing (those of you waiting on requests I promise I will get to them) 

I’ve been sitting on this bitch for months and have a ton of ideas for it but I wanted to see if it was anyone’s cup of tea before I poured hours and hours into it but tbh i probs will either way hehe

Also I tried to make the location ambiguous but I’m a UK gyal and the UK uni experience is all I know so don’t shout at meeeee sorry  

Also pt. 2 this will be slow updates fyi. But I am nothing if not a completionist so it will get finished eventually 

Happy holidays to those celebrating! The fic is on ao3 if you prefer.

Summary: You meet John's father after your first term of university, and find your growing attraction to him difficult to ignore.

Word count: 8,248

Content warnings: Modern AU, age difference, alcohol, mentions of drug use

PART 1 | PART 2 | PART 3 | PART 4 | PART 5 | PART 6 | PART 7 | PART 8 | PART 9 | PART 10

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You hated driving with John, he was far too reckless and half the time you were sure he wasn’t even paying attention to the road, but when compared to getting an overly expensive train or a stuffy coach, it was a no brainer. John’s warped view of the value for money, thanks to him growing up with an abundance of it, also played in your favour in that he refused to take any contributions for fuel. 

After meeting John at a welcome party for your student accommodation, you soon bonded over growing up in a similar area - his house was just an hour on the train from you.  

From then on, you’d often attend each other’s pre-drinks before nights out, and that soon led to you battling through your hangovers together the following day. You frequented his flat more often than your own by the end of the first semester, enjoying the company within it much more than that of yours. He and his childhood friend, Javier, had asked to be put together in their accommodation and he was always a lot of fun on nights out and super easy to get on with, and you discovered he’d taken the same course as you which saved you the worry of being alone in lectures. One of his other flatmates, Sean, had drove you insane when you first met him as he wouldn’t stop talking, but you soon grew to love him, too. 

Abigail was another of his flatmates, and he made the dire mistake of pulling her on the very first night; making the living situation unbearably uncomfortable for everyone else, especially when the two made the event an “accidental” reoccurring theme. It was no secret that she was smitten the moment she met him, but John being John and John also being a university student he had no desire to enter anything serious, even if he did like her more than he let on. 

You’d grown close to one of your own flatmates, Karen, and she often joined you on your trips to the flat across the hall, and after she’d drunkenly got with Sean on one of the nights out, being intoxicated became a requirement for her to visit the flat to calm her embarrassment. So, you all began smoking weed together on a regular occasion, and the small group became your favourite thing about university so far. 

Although you were already saving money by getting a lift most of the way home, the day that John had wanted to return for the Christmas holiday only had expensive ticket options for the final leg of your journey on the train, but two days later was much cheaper and he’d kindly offered you a place in one of his spare rooms. You gladly accepted, eager to see how nice his house was and spend a bit of time with his younger sister, Tilly, who you’d only spoken to over facetime but whose dry sense of humour you found hilarious. 

“Fuck, John, stop cutting people off,” you craned your neck backwards, watching the most recent victim of John’s erratic road presence throwing up the V’s at his car. 

“Stop backseat driving,” he batted his hand, but as always there was no irritation in his relaxed raspy voice, one that was getting raspier by the day considering how much he smoked. If it wasn’t weed, it was cigarettes and oh there he goes lighting another. 

“You do know this is why your car stinks, right?” you asked, cringing slightly at how careless he was even with his nice expensive vehicle. 

“You’re starting to sound like Abigail,” he scoffed, taking an extended inhale from the cigarette and blowing the smoke at you for good measure, laughing in that signature wheeze of his when you recoiled. 

Pushing the button to crank the window down, you leaned over and allowed the fresh air to fill your lungs now that you were back on normal roads. 

The pair of you soon reached a more rural area, and John cleared his throat when he pulled into a gated entrance. You gawked at the property, once John had used his fob to open the gates to reveal a driveway filled with decorative stone leading up to a gorgeous big house. 

“Shiiiiiit,” was all you could muster as you admired the beautiful brick and windows when you stepped out of the car. 

“Yeah, yeah,” he dismissed, flicking his cigarette and leading the way to the front door. 

You’d never seen a door so grand, dark wood that looked heavy and a golden lion's head holding the knocker. John fished his key from his pocket as you rang your fingers over it and didn’t care for your interest when he flung the door open.  

“’m back!” he called into the house, which somehow felt homely despite how large it was. It was only a few moments before Tilly came charging down the stairs and flung her arms around him. You smiled as the pair embraced, one of the few brother-sister duos you knew that didn’t hate each other. They were extremely close, and you’d found out after a few weeks the reason why. 

John’s mother had died when Tilly was only young, and your heart ached for the two kids but thankfully it brought them closer and they always had each other’s backs, with the guidance of their father, who had understandably been broken by her passing, along with their older brother.  

Tilly greeted you too, and you shook her hand as she bounced in the direction of the kitchen. “Dad’s in the back room watching the game with Arthur,” she informed the two of you as you followed in her direction. You’d heard a lot about Arthur, John’s older brother, and had the privilege of seeing a photo of him once. He didn’t live at the house, instead with his boyfriend, Charles, and if you’d have known he was going to be there today you might have made a bit more effort. 

You tried to be subtle as you took in the gorgeous room, black granite counter tops and high-end appliances only a backdrop for the big family kitchen that boasted an island in the middle with stools pulled up to it as it functioned as a breakfast bar too. 

As Tilly helped herself to something from the cupboards, you followed behind John to the adjoining room where you could hear noise from the TV in the form of a football commentator.  

You weren’t often nervous, not really, but something about this big house made you wonder what sort of man owned it and managed to make it warm and inviting while single-handedly raising his three kids. And when you saw him, lounged back on his sofa, wrapping his long ringed fingers around the neck of his cold beer bottle that paused on its way to his lips as his eyes landed on you, you had to gulp. 

And when your name rolled of his tongue, that voice so deep and rich, you tightened your grip on your bag and quietly sucked air into your lungs as you smiled at him coolly. That didn’t help either, just brought your attention to the faint smell of tobacco in the air mixed with cedarwood and some delightful cologne that you wanted to inhale even more of. 

But christ that’s John’s father you’re thinking about and you’re stood there like a moron and he’s waiting for a response. “Mr Van der Linde,” you swallowed. “Thanks for letting me stay, your home is lovely.” 

John tutted loudly at your ass-kissing display, but you didn’t miss him shrinking slightly when his father turned his attention to him. 

“I see you’ve not developed any manners while you’ve been away,” he tipped his chin down at the man who now gave off the aura of a boy, before looking back at you. “Thank you, miss. Please make yourself at home.” 

You nodded and swallowed again, hoping it wasn’t noticeable to anyone else but God your mouth felt so wet all of a sudden. He was John’s father, alright, in possession of the same rugged charm held by his son, but much more refined and much less boyish. He shifted slightly in his seat, propping his leg up on the L-shaped sofa that he’d claimed the corner of. You darted your eyes away, reminding yourself not to look between his legs but wishing you could because those tailored black trousers did wonders for him. 

“That’s Arthur,” John pointed lazily at the other man in the room, and you hadn’t even looked at him yet, but you were glad for something else to focus on. He was also a treat to look at, even more so in the flesh and you wondered what it was about this family that produced these kinds of men because you’d never encountered anything like it and now here you were in a room with three of them. 

“Nice to meet you, Arthur,” you smiled and the man nodded in acknowledgement, nudging his beer upwards slightly. 

Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Mr Van der Linde loosen the collar of his crisp white shirt, that’d been rolled up to reveal his forearms as a substitution for changing out of his work clothes to make himself comfortable. 

“Will the two of you be joining us, son?” 

You looked to John, part of you hoping he’d say yes but part of you desperate for any excuse to leave the room so you could breathe. John opted for the latter option, muttering something about being hungry and tired and wanting to settle in after the drive and Arthur asked when he planned on telling them all about his life at university, for him to just mutter later as he departed the room, and you quickly offered a smile to the two gentlemen before following him out. 

“I’ll let you pick a room before we get the bags,” John began the walk up the stairs and you grunted behind him. 

“Pick? You mean there’s more than one?” 

He shrugged, as he always does when he felt uncomfortable discussing his financial situation. Half the time, you thought he hated having money, but you supposed it was more his manifested embarrassment over how much it set him apart from other people. Nobody would guess if they didn’t know, both due to his mannerisms and his insistence on often wearing the same t-shirt for a week straight. 

“Well, where’s your room?” you asked, thinking that picking whichever was closest to him was the safest bet. 

John pointed up, before walking towards a door which when opened, revealed another small flight of stairs. “Mine’s the attic. You’ve got the choice of that one,” he pointed at a door in front of you to the left, “and that one,” he pointed behind you at a second door, before making his way up the stairs to dump the first of his stuff. 

You looked between the doors and decided to investigate the first one. It was bigger than your room at home, decorated in white and duck egg blue with a large double bed in the centre. The theme was the ocean, a beautiful painting above the bed depicting a grand ship on a calm sea. You’d be more than happy to stay here, hell a sofa would do you fine, but you still gave the other room a look even if out of pure nosiness.  

The second room was warmer, dark wooden furnishings with an accent of a pretty mustard colour. The double bed was tucked into the corner beside the window, looking out over the garden and countryside beyond. There was no theme to this room, but a few decorations appeared to be antiques. You dropped your bag by an old-looking gramophone and ran your finger over the brass horn, marvelling at something so pretty being hidden away in a spare room. You peered at the disc inside, making out Tchaikovsky in faded lettering and reached your hand out to turn the crank, but recoiled when you realised you’d probably end up breaking it. 

John’s feet thundering down the stairs prompted you to turn towards the doorway and he beckoned you to follow with the tilt of his head as he peered inside. You did, and the two of you made your way to the kitchen in search of food once your suitcase was safely situated in your room. 

“There any dinner on?” he called to the next room. 

“What’s it look like to you?” Arthur called back and John grumbled something about him being a smartarse.  

“Half time is in five minutes, we’ll just order takeout if you decide what to get,” Mr Van der Linde called, prompting John to reach into a drawer and pull out a handful of menus. 

“I forgot they even had paper menus,” you mused, leaning up beside John as you ran your hands over them to splay them out and get a good look. It all looked so good; you didn’t care which one they ordered from. “I’ll eat anything,” you announced and John huffed. 

“You always do this. Can’t you pick for once?” 

“I don’t mind! I could eat a horse I’m that hungry.” 

John just rolled his eyes and scanned over the menus before pulling two of them out and presenting them in front of you. “Choose between these two then, I’ve whittled it down.” 

You sighed, thinking that’s a fair deal as you looked between the two options: Indian or Thai. 

Both were delightful, but you knew John would complain if you didn’t make the decision. After a minute of back and forth, you decided the tofu guay tiew was the most appealing and vocalised your choice of Thai. 

“Dad’ll be happy,” he remarked, collecting up the other menus and unceremoniously jamming them into the drawer, “that’s his favourite.” 

At the small sense of pride that filled your chest, you cursed yourself internally. Something about the man made you want to please him, an odd sensation for you since you usually could care less what other people thought. Besides, it was just a takeaway for Christ’s sake. 

Shifting from the next room prefaced the two men that parted from it, expressions content and you assumed their team was winning. They were both so tall, because of course they were. 

“Are you staying for dinner?” Mr Van der Linde asked Arthur who nodded as he deposited the beer bottles into the bin. 

“Sure, I wanna hear all about little Johnny’s adventures,” he had a strong southern drawl, and proceeded to ruffle John’s hair who shoved him away in displeasure. 

“Did you let our guest choose?” Mr Van der Linde then asked, raising his eyebrows at his other son before glancing at you with a small half-smirk. 

John answered by reaching over the counter and handing him the menu, his eyes lighting up once he realised which one you’d chosen. “Good choice,” he hummed, not looking up at you and instead reaching into his pocket for his phone. “What does everyone want?” 

“We can just use the app,” said John. 

“No, I’ll call.” 

John’s sigh caused the man to harden his gaze.  

“It’s quicker over the phone,” he explained irritably. 

“Dad’s an EOP,” John informed you. 

“EOP?” Arthur repeated. 

“Enemy of progress,” John responded, as though it was terminology even a baby should know, despite he himself only learning it from you a month ago. 

“I am not,” the man grumbled. “Just don’t see the point of an app, is all.” 

You smirked at the back and forth as Arthur rolled his eyes. “Someone just order the damn food,” he drawled. 

Once everyone had ordered, including Tilly who it turns isn’t overly fond of Thai food but was quickly reminded by her father that she’d had free reign over the house and choice of takeout for three months, and it was only fair that her brother got to pick on his first night back. John teased her, saying that she’d become spoilt now that she was practically an only child.  

“It should get here in time for the end of the game if we order and you collect it, otherwise we’ll have to wait an extra twenty. Up to you.” 

“We’ll collect,” John answered without pause. 

“You students really that hungry, huh?” Arthur chortled. 

“I’m just excited to eat something that’s not instant noodles or beans on toast,” you hummed, thinking longingly about how much you’d missed a well-cooked meal. 

“Or instant noodles on toast, in your case,” John teased. 

At the looks of disgust directed at you, you huffed. “It’s nicer than it sounds!” 

“That a thing you do often?” Arthur asked, more than intrigued by the strange diet of a student. 

“Only when I fancy a change,” you shrugged and he scoffed, partially in disbelief and partially in amusement. 

“Well, let us hope that your meal tonight is slightly more appealing,” Mr Van der Linde slid his phone back into his pocket, beckoning Arthur to follow him into the back room as the commentator announced the start of the second half. 

You and John had left almost straight away to pick up the food, just to keep yourselves occupied, and thankfully it wasn’t long before you were back at his house and greeted with an already-set table including a couple bottles of wine. 

It was a bit of performance getting everyone’s correct orders to them, but eventually you were all seated. Mr Van der Linde was at the head of the table (of course) with Arthur and John either side of him, you sitting next to John and Tilly sitting next to Arthur. 

“Help yourselves to wine,” Mr Van der Linde gestured to the bottle of red and John didn’t need to be asked twice, pouring himself a large glass which his father eyed suspiciously. 

John side-eyed you and laughed at your pursed expression. “She has a uh... an aversion to red wine,” he explained to the table. 

You threw him a glare, embarrassed that he was bringing up your drunken tales from when you were learning your limits, even if you’re still yet to be mindful of them. 

“Ha,” Arthur barked, “I’d like to hear that story.” 

“Nobody is hearing that story,” you paused, “especially not while we’re eating,” you shuddered at the memory, looking at the delicious food in front of you and willing your brain to think about anything else. 

“This is proper wine, not like that shit you students drink,” Mr Van der Linde huffed. “Just try a tiny bit.” 

You obeyed, albeit hesitantly as you offered out your glass and John poured a mouthful in. Bracing yourself, you sipped it and tried to ignore the eyes around the table on you. 

It tasted rich, smooth and warm on your throat and nothing like that red wine you’d experienced at university which was more closely related to window treatment. “Oh,” your tongue lapped slightly in your mouth, “that is nice.” You held your glass out again for John to fill and Mr Van der Linde chuckled to himself. 

“I still want to hear some drunken tales,” Arthur took a sip of his own wine as you took another of yours. 

“Well, I have plenty about John,” you smirked, forking some of your noodles into your mouth and nearly groaning at how good it tasted. Tilly’s eyes widened with intrigue. 

“Don’t you dare,” he hissed, stomping his heel onto your toe under the table. 

Your squeak turned into a laugh, and you raised your brows at him - I’ll keep your secrets if you keep mine. 

He shifted his attention back to the food, knowing he had much more to lose in the present circumstance, and your agreement with one another was settled. 

“How are your lectures, son?” 

John shrugged. “Fine.” 

“What are you learning about?” 

You smirked around your next sip of wine, knowing that John hadn’t got a clue about the contents of his course given his terrible attendance to his lectures. 

“Uh... Ethics.” 

“Anything else?” 

John attempted to remember the names of the modules he’d done the bare minimum for, but it didn’t seem to fool Mr Van der Linde one bit. He had mentioned that the push to study philosophy had come from his father, and unlike most kids that did something because their parents wanted them too, John didn’t seem to care. He much preferred being out of doors, with animals or working with his hands. Above anything, John preferred not working. So, a three-year degree, paid for by his father where he could slack off for a little while longer was more than welcome. 

The way his father looked at him, you could tell John would be getting a talking to in a more private setting at a later date, but he instead turned his attention to you in favour of not lowering the mood around the table. 

“Do you have more of an interest in your course than John does in his?” he asked you, his voice not entirely cleared of his disappointment and John noticed it too, shrinking his shoulders slightly. 

“I suppose so,” you said brightly, hoping to alleviate the tension. 

“You’re studying philosophy like John?” 

“Oh, no,” you sipped at your wine, feeling as though you were being interviewed for your place on said course all over again. “Computer Science.”  

He raised his eyebrow in surprise and Arthur hummed to vocalise how impressed he was. “Smart girl,” Mr Van der Linde said thoughtfully before taking a bite of food. 

“She’s only interested in it because she has to be,” John scoffed, and you wondered if part of him was jealous at the praise you were getting that he wasn’t. “She’s got a scholarship,” he clarified. 

You cleared your throat, embarrassed and slightly irritated at John for mentioning it. “I have to keep my attendance above eighty percent,” you shrugged nonchalantly. 

“A scholarship? My my,” Mr Van der Linde brought his glass to his lips. 

You just shook your head. Truthfully, you wouldn’t have even been able to go were it not for the scholarship; it would have been far too expensive, so you didn’t really have a choice in the matter if you wanted a place on the course.  

“Do you know what you want to do for work?” 

“Not really, suppose I’ll just go into software - that’s where most of the jobs are,” you took another sip of the wine and found your glass empty. “I guess I won’t go into app development, though.” 

Even though you could slap yourself for trying to banter with him and only coming up with something so pathetic, he chuckled into his glass and his eyes were warm as they bore into yours when he licked a stray droplet from his bottom lip as he set the glass down. 

You could swear you clenched. 

“You always get flushed after wine,” John commented with amusement, refilling your glass before his own. 

“I’m not,” you said quietly, holding your knuckles to your cheek and yes, your skin was burning. You grumbled and dipped your head, the spicy flavours of your dish now something you were all too aware of. 

Mr Van der Linde just observed you, something unreadable on his face or maybe the wine had gone to your head and you just no longer had the capacity to distinguish emotions. 

“Well,” he wiped a napkin over his mouth and sat back in his chair, his plate completely emptied of food. “I’m glad you’re around to keep John in check.” 

“She isn’t as sensible and innocent as she looks,” John said over a full mouthful and Arthur tutted at his lack of table manners. 

“That so.” Mr Van der Linde wasn’t asking. He sipped at his wine. 

“Sure I am,” you cleared your throat, finding your voice once again but having nothing more to say to defend yourself. You couldn’t deny that John had experienced you in a light that was more than ill-fashioned, thanks to the numerous substances you’d experimented with over your short friendship so far. 

The conversation continued long after dinner finished, Tilly talking all about her new school year and it was clear how much her father and brothers adored her; looking at her with all the love in the world and your heart swelled at the display. Your head swelled too, and you stopped your alcohol consumption after your fourth glass of wine, knowing you’d have a fierce headache in the morning. 

Unfortunately, the conversation didn’t turn to the topic of Mr Van der Linde, and in your drunken haze you couldn’t stop your mind wandering as you thought about him as he sat there, a soft grin and slightly heavy eyelids following the wine and beer he’d drank that day with a hearty meal to top it off. You desperately tried to keep your gaze on whoever was talking, and for the past twenty minutes it’d been mainly Arthur. He briefly mentioned the business Dutch owned (what the business was, you had no idea) with another man, Hosea, his most trusted friend and colleague.  

None of you had realised how close to midnight it was, and you rubbed at your eyes once Arthur pointed it out and called for a taxi to take him home. A yawn and a stretch later, you stood to excuse yourself too. 

“Thanks again for dinner, Mr Van der Linde,” you said, picking up your cutlery, plate, and glass and loading them into the dishwasher. 

“Please,” his voice came from right behind you and you stifled a gasp as you turned. John and Tilly were saying their goodbyes to Arthur at the door, but Mr Van der Linde was right next to you and god did he smell good. 

And god, were you drunk. 

“Call me Dutch,” he crooned, loading his own dishes beside yours. 

All you could think to respond with was a nod. “Alright, thanks. Dutch.” 

His brow softened at hearing his name on your tongue and he allowed himself the slight indulgence of wandering his eyes down your form as you walked away, clearly trying to hide in your walk how quickly the wine had gone to your head. He was in no position to judge, attributing his interest in his son’s pretty friend to nothing more than a drunken lapse of judgement that would go no further than that.  

- 

Your mouth was so dry.  

The room span a little as you opened your eyes, but the headache wasn’t as bad as some you’d had previously, thankful that it was still dark out and you didn’t have to deal with any blinding lights. Rolling over within the comfort of the bed, which you could tell was dressed with a very expensive sheet and duvet set, you tilted your phone that sat charging on the nightstand and checked the time. 03:43. 

Lord knows why you didn’t bring a glass of water to bed, or at the very least have some before you went to sleep, but you needed some right now and sat up to swing your feet onto the floor.  

The house was still warm, and you ran your hand over a radiator in passing to find that it was on a low heat, so no wonder. You wore your plain, oversized, grey t-shirt and some underwear that you always referred to as your ‘boy shorts’. Drunken you had decided to be a little modest, at least. 

(Mostly) sober you didn’t follow that trend, venturing onto the landing without pulling on some trackies, saying to yourself that you’d only be a moment anyway, so it was no matter. 

You tiptoed down the stairs, thankful for the minimum creaking of the floorboards and made your way to the kitchen, the tiles cold on your bare feet.  

There were a lot of cabinets, and while it felt rude to rummage through them you didn’t have much choice unless you wanted to lean over and drink straight from the tap, which was a much worse position to be caught in should someone see you. You eventually found the cupboard with the glasses and mugs, and after pulling out a pint glass you filled it up and gulped it down within seconds. 

You did the same thing again, and as you were halfway done with your second glass a dim light was flicked on and you almost choked on your drink. 

“Didn’t mean to startle you.” 

Turning, you held your hand to your mouth to mask the massive gulp of water you held in it, and you swallowed it down as gracefully as you could, wiping your lips with the back of your hand as you cleared your throat to greet Dutch. 

“It’s no problem,” you shook your head. “Sorry, did I wake you?" 

He shook his head too, dismissively, and you didn’t miss his eyeline drop to your legs before back at your face. 

“Shit,” you muttered, moving to hide your bottom half behind the island and he smirked. 

“Don’t worry about it.” 

But obviously you did, you’d known him shy of twelve hours and he’d just found you in his kitchen dressed the way you were and he’d probably seen half of your ass when you were turned the other way. 

You glanced down at yourself by uncomfortably. 

He let you fester for a moment under his smirk, before shrugging off his night gown to reveal his broad and surprisingly muscular chest, black hairs decorating it as well as his stomach. “Here,” he handed it out to you over the counter, leaving himself in just his red and black checked bottoms. 

You took it without thinking, most of your brain power allocated to the task of not staring and you looked at the garment in your hands. “You don’t have to -” 

“It’s fine.” He looked almost bored of your apologetic demeanour, something you realised he’d seen a lot of from you. You took the robe and wrapped it around yourself, the softness of it making you want to curl up but not quite as much as that scent did. 

“Thanks,” you mumbled and he nodded. “You don’t have any painkillers, do you?” you asked, feeling like an immature teenager that couldn’t handle her drink. “Just in case.” 

“Of course.” He moved round the counter and opened a drawer, tutting at the creased-up menus that jammed it and you did your best to hide your amusement. A rattle from the packet later, he pushed two out and offered them to you, and you held your hand out for him to drop them in. You popped them in your mouth and leaned your head back to gulp down some water. 

He stared at your neck as you did so, but ripped his attention away when you brought your head back down. 

“Is your head hurting?” he asked, stepping towards you and holding his hand to your forehead while brushing your hair away soothingly. 

“Oh no, not really,” you swallowed. “It’s just in case it does in the morning.” 

“I see,” he said plainly, casually returning his arm to his side. 

“Thanks... again.” 

Leaning back on the counter behind him, he crossed one foot over the other and offered you a gentle smile. You took another few sips, emptying your glass. 

You glanced from Dutch to the sink and back to Dutch, before making your way over to fill up again. Now he was right next to you, silently observing and you didn’t face away from the sink as you drank down some more water. You could feel how warm he was, it radiated from his chest, and you were glad to have sobered up because you were certain drunken you would’ve just leaned into it, and how awful would that be. 

Awful. Terrible. Definitely not wonderful. 

Gulping down the rest of the glass, you finally felt satisfied and filled up once more so you could bring some it to bed with you. You turned to the man beside you, who did nothing other than blink. 

“Good night, Mr Van der Linde.” 

“Good night, miss.” 

You walked out of the kitchen, remembering you hadn’t called him Dutch like he’d asked but supposing it wasn’t a big deal and you couldn’t think too long on it without the image of him topless crept back into your mind. 

He’s John’s dad.  

Shaking your head to hopefully rid it of your thoughts, you pushed open the door to your room and closed it gently before climbing into bed and curling in on yourself, keeping his nightgown wrapped around you. 

- 

Despite it being winter, it was too hot when you woke. 

It was no surprise, given the heating was on and you were wearing Dutch’s robe and had a thick duvet draped over you. You kicked it off, star-fishing and grimacing at the sweat that’d pooled on your lower back. 

09:07. 

You brought up your messages with John. 

Going to get a shower if you don’t mind.  

John was mostly hit and miss with his sleeping schedule, sometimes he’d be up at the crack of dawn and other times he’d sleep in until mid-afternoon. Today, you were thankfully he’d been an early riser. 

Knock yourself out.  

You stayed still for a moment, before sliding out of the bed and unzipping your suitcase to find your toiletries bag. Not wanting to change into anything that was clean, you opted for keeping Dutch’s nightgown on since you were only walking across the hall. 

But when you did, and reached your hand out to open the bathroom door, you could hear the shower on from inside. You frowned and turned, in time for Tilly to depart from her room to the right.  

“Oh, John’s just gone in,” she informed you. 

“Fucker,” you grumbled and she tilted her head at you in questioning. “I just told him I was getting a shower.” 

She giggled apologetically, her eyes shifting to look behind you at the sound of a door opening. You turned. Dutch. You hadn’t realised the room next to yours was his. 

“You’re welcome to use my ensuite,” he yawned, patting Tilly’s arm as she passed him to go downstairs. 

“Are you sure?” 

“I wouldn’t offer if I wasn’t.” 

“Right,” you nodded. “Thank you.” 

“There’s no shower in there,” he leaned against the door frame, folding his arms over his now (unfortunately) covered chest. “Just a bath, but I can draw you one up no problem.” 

A bath. God, you missed baths. Your accommodation only had crappy showers that were unbearably inconsistent with their water pressure and temperature. 

“I’m sure I can wait,” you shrugged, not wanting to trouble him even a little. 

“John’ll be at least 20 minutes,” he pointed to the door with disappointment, “bath’ll be full in ten.” 

You swallowed, now feeling like it’d be rude of you to say no. “O-Okay, thanks. But I can run it.” 

“Please, allow me. On account of my idiot son,” he scratched the back of his scalp lazily. 

You huffed a laugh, not wanting to oppose him anymore and gave in. “Alright, I appreciate it.” 

Dutch nodded, disappearing into his room and you busied yourself back in yours while you waited. You were fiddling with the gramophone again when he rapped at your open door. 

“You just turn the crank,” he informed you. 

“Oh, yeah, I didn’t want to break it.” 

He huffed in amusement, meandering over and stopping next to you to wind it up. 

You smiled fondly, as the ever-familiar Dance of The Swans began playing. 

“Swan Lake,” you hummed, more to yourself than Dutch but he turned to you with his eyebrows raised. 

“You like ballet?” 

“Love it. Used to take lessons when I was younger, not that I was any good,” you snorted. “Swan Lake was always my favourite.” 

His smile was warm, and eyes intrigued. “Do you go to see the shows often?” 

“Not as often as I’d like, it’s been a couple years actually.” Life as a student didn’t often allow room for the luxuries of tickets to the ballet. 

Dutch nodded thoughtfully. “Well, your bath is ready.” 

You followed him out the room, the song reaching its crescendo and fading out in your ears as the two of you walked further away from it. He opened the door to his bedroom, motioning for you to enter. 

“There’s a speaker in there if you want to put on any music, John says it’s Bluetooth or something.” 

God, he’s adorable. 

He’s also John’s father goddamnit.  

“Thank you,” you cleared your throat, walking past him and through the next open door, stopping at the frame. 

“Take your time,” he hummed after you and you nodded in appreciation as you closed the door. You'd wanted to sneak a peek at his room but couldn’t very well do so with him watching you. You dropped your things on the floor and locked the ensuite, turning to the pristine bathroom that felt warm and cosy despite the fact it was mostly grey, the floor slate and the standalone bath by the small window at the end. 

The smells inside the room were wonderful, and you peered into the steaming tub and to your surprise it was filled with bubbles, the water a shade of lavender and you were impressed that he even had the supplies to make such a delightful bath. 

He’d even lit a candle for you. 

You shrugged off his robe and hung it on the back of the door, taking a second to smell it and make sure it didn’t now reek of your sweat. Thankfully, it didn’t. 

It was the best bath you’d ever had. You’d played some of your favourite relaxing music and looped through an entire album before you cracked your eyes open, realising how long you’d sat in the warmth as your hangover dissolved away. 

Giving the bath a little once over with the scourer and bathroom spray you found under the sink once the water was out, you rubbed your nice-smelling moisturiser over your skin and dressed in your clothes for the day; feeling miles better than you had done a few hours previous. 

You only allowed your eyes to rake over Dutch’s bedroom briefly, dark mahogany furnishings and an extremely inviting king-sized bed with silk sheets in the centre of the room. The only think you didn’t like was how eerily tidy it was. You left quickly. 

The scent of something sweet greeted you and you cringed slightly upon seeing the hands of the fancy kitchen clock reading the time of 10:25. Whoops. 

Nobody seemed to mind, greeting you as John and Tilly sat at the breakfast bar while Dutch cooked over the stove. You flicked John’s ear as you passed him for stealing your shower, although you weren’t really that bothered since the alternative was much more desirable. He rasped his laugh, as usual, and you could tell he’d just had his morning cigarette, though you suspected he was missing his weed that he’d usually smoke on a Saturday morning. 

“You were pretty wasted last night,” he slung his arm over you, and you pressed your forehead into his shoulder. 

“I wasn’t that bad,” you mumbled into the fabric of his hoodie that you’d borrowed on more than one occasion. 

He vibrated with a laugh, resting his head on top of yours and you pondered which one of you had really been that drunk, considering he was showing signs of a strong hangover; he was always very snuggly after a particularly heavy night. “Hair of the dog later?” 

“You’re going out tonight?” Tilly asked and John looked to you. 

“If we don’t find anything else to do, probably. We did say we were only going to go if Javi went anyway.” 

“And is he?” 

“Not sure,” you hummed, shifting to lay your head on John sideways (he was surprisingly comfortable given his lean frame) and pulling out your phone to find no new messages from Javier. 

Thoughts on tonight?  

You set your phone on the counter, not expecting a reply until much later when he finally joined the land of the living. 

“We could go on a walk?” Tilly asked sweetly and John groaned. 

“A walk,” you jabbed his side, “would be lovely. Maybe in a few hours when John’s recovered.” 

“Coming, dad?” 

Dutch cleared his throat, seemingly very focused on his cooking and slung the tea towel over his shoulder. “Uh... Perhaps. It’s colder than it looks out there.” 

He brought two bowls over, one filled with fresh berries and another with melted chocolate. You groaned in delight and sat up from John, peering at the selection.  

When the bowl of chopped banana arrived along with lemon juice and sugar, Dutch allowed himself a glance in your direction and his lips turned up at the sight of you eagerly eying the food. 

He finally brought over the pancakes, sauce, and fresh orange juice before seating himself beside Tilly. 

You salivated at the display in front of you, the best cure for a hangover that wasn’t quite the same when you’d made it back in your flat. “Thanks so much, Dutch,” you hummed, beginning to stack your pancakes with toppings.  

“It’s my pleasure,” he chuckled, pouring out a cup of coffee. 

Internally, John briefly questioned when you’d gotten to a first name basis with his dad but didn’t give it much thought to it and soon his full focus was on the food in front of him. 

“I got a load of washing,” he chewed his last mouthful after pretty much inhaling his breakfast, washing it down with a glass of orange juice. 

“You know where the laundry room is,” Dutch countered calmly to which John scoffed and stood to grab his washing that’d accumulated over the past few weeks. “Do you want to wash anything, miss?” 

“Oh,” you swallowed your juice, remembering your suitcase full of clothes that needed washing. “It’s fine, I do have some but I was just going to do it when I got home.” 

“Nonsense. When John’s finished you can put a load on.” 

You shrugged. “Alright, suppose I may as well.” 

Later that day, Dutch called up the stairs to let you know the washing machine was free and you ambled downstairs after separating your clean clothes from those that needed washing. He directed you to the laundry room and you placed your suitcase on the dryer and opened it, deciding that one load should be enough. You looked at his fancy washing machine, slightly uncertain on how to get it going. 

As though reading your mind, he appeared in the doorway and cleared up your confusion. You turned to thank him and found his eyes cast down to your pile of clothing – and you were mortified to see your underwear right at the top. In an attempt to play it cool, you looked back to him and he gave you a smile, one that had you questioning if he’d even been looking or if it was just a figment of your imagination. You returned his expression, turning back to desperately try and remember what he’d just told you about how to work the appliance and you leaned over to turn a dial and pretend you knew what you were doing. You breathed a sigh of relief when the door clicked shut after an extended moment, and dumped your pile of clothes in. 

Unfortunately, the weather was both cold and rainy by the afternoon, squashing all hopes Tilly had of going on a walk. She made you promise that when you next came round, you’d join them on one and you were reminded that you had to leave tomorrow but the prospect of returning was an exciting one. Incidentally, Javier had no desire to go out in the rain and so yours and John’s plans were cancelled too, but you went to the drive through for a late lunch that you’d both finished by the time you returned to his house. 

Instead, you spent the rest of the day on the sofa with Tilly and John, flicking through Netflix and bundled under blankets. Dutch put you to shame by having a better social life and going out for beers with his friends that evening, but he made a lasagne to go in the oven when the three of you got hungry, and the entire thing was demolished in no time. Nursing a rather large food baby, you turned in at around 11pm. 

- 

“Are you going to come and watch?” John asked you after he informed the room that he'd be playing football with the guys on that dreary Sunday. 

You glanced out the window and back to him with a frown. “It’s pouring rain. And I see you’re going back on your promise to give me a lift to the station.” 

“I never promised nothing,” his expression told a different story; he’d just forgotten. “Dad’ll take you,” he gestured to his father who looked up from his phone. 

“Course I will,” Dutch stated, and returned his attention to the device in his hand. 

“Oh, it’s fine, I can get a taxi -” 

His expression alone silenced you as he looked up once more, an eyebrow raised at you to stop protesting. “I insist,” he said after letting the silence hang in the air for a bit. You just nodded. 

When John left an hour later, he gave you a big squeeze goodbye and you told him to at least do some revision for his exams in January, to which he countered that they didn’t even count to the final grade and you couldn’t really argue with him on that. With Tilly up in her room and a couple of hours to kill before you had to leave, you tried to find something to watch on TV but had no luck and sighed as you eyed your laptop beside you. May as well try and get some work done. 

You begrudgingly pulled up the code for one of your assignments, but soon found yourself focused and began to make some decent progress. 

“What on earth is that,” Dutch commented, leaning on the back of the sofa as he squinted at your screen over your shoulder. 

Huffing a laugh, you craned your neck to look back at him. “Broken code,” you stated, before looking back at said code. 

“Looks... interesting. How can you concentrate with this on?” he gestured to the TV. 

“Oh,” you looked up, half forgetting it was even on. “It’s just background noise.” 

“I see. Mind if I watch something?” 

As if he was asking you, like it wasn’t his own house. “Course not.” 

He moved round the sofa and dropped himself in the spot you’d first found him in, and he flicked through the channels until he landed on a cooking show, and you were reminded of how delightful your dinner was last night. 

“That lasagne was so good,” you commented, not taking your gaze off the screen in front of you. 

“I’m glad you liked it. Can I get you a drink?” 

“Oh,” you blinked at him, “no, I’m fine thank you.” 

You returned your attention back to your work and settled into the cushion of the sofa. It felt oddly normal to sit with Dutch, while he did have a very intimidating aura, he was also the kind of person you could sit in silence with and not have it be awkward. He lounged back, watching his show while you typed away on your keyboard.  

Before you knew it, an hour and a half had passed, and you rubbed your eyes before closing your laptop.  

“Ready to get going?” 

You groaned and rested back, wishing you could curl up on the comfy sofa instead. “I guess,” you grumbled. 

Dutch chuckled fondly. “You’re welcome back anytime.” 

“Thanks Mr Van der Linde,” you smiled at him, and there was something about the way he was looking at you... 

Or perhaps it was your imagination. 

He cleared his throat as he stood, placing his warm hand on your shoulder as he passed and you almost leaned into it, but he was out the room before you could and all that remained was that scent of his. You shivered as you stood. 

The short journey to the station was delightful, in Dutch’s fancy car that had heated seats and was pristinely clean. You only allowed yourself to look at him once, the way he sat back and leisurely stirred the wheel with one hand, his other one resting on his thigh. 

“Have a good Christmas, miss,” he tipped his head as you turned to close the door, and you returned the sentiment. 

You were actually glad to be leaving, a little fantasising was harmless but there was something about that look in his eye that had you wondering if perhaps it could be a reality. And, of course, that was territory you’d never venture into; sleeping with your friend’s dad, a man twice your age? Absolutely not. Time to enjoy Christmas at home and forget all about him. 

When you couldn’t find one of your favourite pair of knickers, the lacy, dark grey ones, you tutted at yourself for forgetting them even though you were sure you’d packed them. But when you returned for second term at university, they weren’t anywhere to be found in your flat, either. 

[lifesarchive]

UGLIES by SCOTT WESTERFELD (A REVIST)

quickly: a new friend wakes a teenage girl up to the not-so-pretty world she is living in (new face, who dis! / pretty privilege / mandatory plastic surgery / pranks and tricks as a lifestyle / journeys over the river and through the woods / solar powered hoverboards / dehydrated foodstuffs / engineered plastic and nanotech glues / ecofriendly totalitarianism / the deep deep state / underground facilities / government programming / citizen deprogramming / backstabbing the backstabbers).

Rereading since originally reading it back in 2007. First book of 2024!

Vintage clothing is cool, but what will we do when our entire society and way of life becomes vintage? What if, in an effort to rid society of its ills (war, illness, violence, etc.) we developed a medical procedure that made everyone the same and dulled our sensibilities? Scott Westerfeld isn’t a master wordsmith with a poet’s pen, but that’s not what we came here for anyway. We came for the well-constructed futuristic dystopian universe jam-packed with unimaginable avant-garde technology and the social dilemmas that erupt when humanity and technology collide. There are hoverboards that work by magnetism, medical procedures that can regrow all the skin on your body and reshape your entire bone structure, and surveillance so precise it practically knows what you are thinking.

At the center of all of this is Tally, a fifteen-year-old girl who wants exactly what everyone else in her world has been programmed to want: to be pretty. While she is awaiting the government-facilitated procedure that will make her “the standard” and initiate her into young adult society, she meets a new friend who is also nearing the time of her pretty procedure. Her new friend is a radical, transfixed by the idea of a land faraway called “The Smoke”, where many of the Uglies have been escaping to evade the overseeing technological eyes of their government… a government so secret that some don’t believe it even exists. As Tally is exposed to life outside The Cities, she becomes the focal point of a massive movement of rebellion. This was a fun, wild hoverboard ride through a very futuristic world that felt very grounded in today’s times.

★ ★ ★ ★

more thoughts: SPOILERS!

Thoughts are italicized, spoilers are not: 

Some personal context… I originally read the entire Uglies trilogy one summer in 2007. I had a boxed set that included UGLIES, PRETTIES, and SPECIALS. EXTRAS hadn’t come out yet, and I’ve never read it. I vividly remember the 3 book set with the high-fashion editorial style covers. My original copies were lost in what I call “The Flood”, which took a great number of pieces in my literary collection to a moldy watery grave. I found a pic of them on Amazon though. 

These covers are SO MUCH better than the current blank generic covers they have in stores and libraries. I plan on rereading the entire series and finshing with a first read of the last book, EXTRAS.

This book made me feel like it was 2007 again, and that I could throw this book down at any moment, step outside, and find my friends waiting for me to go along on one of our adventures playing in the woods that connected our backyards.

The book starts with Tally pulling a trick by sneaking into the highly monitored New Pretty Town to visit an old friend. Tally is a young, simple, coming-of-age girl who thinks just like everyone around her… life is useless until you turn 16 and the government turns you pretty, and then life is great. Until 16, nothing matters and no one takes you seriously. Uglies, as people are lovingly called pre-operation, are expected to be wild, uncontrollable, trouble-making good for nothings. This is why all of their pranks are referred to as ugly tricks, or simply tricks. When you’re a pretty, you don’t have time for such trickery. 

The Uglies live in dorms that are bland and interchangeable. The Pretties live in a glamorous city within a city, where life is a party with a formal dress code. Then eventually Pretties undergo a second operation to become a “Middle Pretty” where they move out to the suburbs to have “Littlies”, before turning into “Crumblies” and are moved further to the edges of society. Of course, all this turns out to be well-thought-out propoganda 

Tally makes a new friend, Shay, after her old best friend Peris reaches Pretty age and undergoes the operation. He moves to New Pretty Town immediately after, as is customary, leaving Ugly life behind. After busting into New Pretty Town to see how much Peris has changed, she decides it is best to just wait until she has her own operation to see him again. Her time spent with the rebellious and adventurous Shay increases. 

Shay teaches Tally how to hack her hoverboard, sneak out of The City, and tells her about The Smoke. A place where people live as ‘Uglies’ by choice, opting out of having the operation to become pretty. Shay teaches Tally the way to the rusting city ruins where Uglies meet up to find the mysterious David who will someday lead those willing to make the journey to The Smoke.

Tally can’t comprehend life lived as an Ugly, and doesn’t understand why anyone would want to forgo the operation to become Pretty. This is why she can’t tell Shay YES, when Shay asks Tally to run away to the smoke with her before her operation. Tally ends up making the journey anyway, alone, after she is manipulated by Special Circumstances (a secret underground division of the government) into betraying her friend and everyone at The Smoke. 

Life in The Smoke opens her eyes to the real world that has been hidden from her. Her desire to be pretty wanes, and disappears after bonding with the other residents. She falls in love with David and plans to stay. After accidentally triggering the tracking device given to her by Special Circumstances, Tally leads SC directly to The Smoke. It is swiftly destroyed and all the Smokies are detained. (Cue big breakout scene where Tally escapes custody, tracks down the detainees, and frees them.)

After all the hell she’s raised, Tally ends up developing a plan to help right some of her wrongs, but you’ll have to make it through to the end to see what that may be.

The rest is for you to read on your own!

I’ve read some of the reviews on Goodreads that criticize Tally’s character as being too vain, dumb, selfish, etc. This makes me wonder if the readers with those opinions understood the circumstances of the world that Tally was a part of. Everyone was vain, dumb, and selfish. No one wanted to look under the veneer of their society because there was no reason to. Everything was taken care of. The people in this world were programmed to think that the past was a monstrous barbaric place and that all the world’s problems were solved by the development of ’the Cities’ and the Pretty operation. 

I’ve also read some reviews that criticize the fact that Tally’s love interest David is what inspires her to make her big decision to leave the cities for good. I think that is a poor summarization of this character’s journey. After having to make the long journey to The Smoke by herself, Tally endured a process of disillusionment that separated her from her life in The City. She had gone from a place where everything was planned, every move was monitored, and the threat of world catastrophe was linked to how ugly or pretty citizens were. She had never been in real danger until she made her journey to The Smoke. She had never met anyone older than 16 who was not “pretty” until she arrived at the camp, The Smoke. David was just one of the reasons she made her decisions, not the sole reason. In fact, Tally’s journey begins and ends with her trying to save her girl-friend Shay.

I won’t go into too much more detail about the story. It was just a fun read, an adventure, a journey, all those things. So glad to have re-read it, and so glad it held up after all these years. There are plenty of high-speed chases, thrilling escapes, and ingenious hi-jinks to keep you turning the page. And if you’re a tumblr kid like me, there are loads of nostalgia in reading this book again all these years later. It’s wild to think that this never made it to the big screen or as a series on someone’s streaming service. 

[demonslayedher]

Why do you like Demon Slayer so much?

I---I don't know, Anon, w-why do you like breathing so much?

...because BREATH TECHNIQUE LOOKS WICKED AWESOME AMIRITE!??!!?

UFOTABLE MADE SUCH A FREAKING COOL LOOKING ANIME that both looks and sounds amazing with all that care put into it HOW COULD I NOT LOVE IT!? Such good source material too, ALL HAIL WANI-SENSEI!!!!

Or rather, to more eloquently express myself, I'll answer this in two parts: the "why" and "so much."

Why do I like it?

- Simplicity

It's a classic Good .vs. Evil story, a triumph of working hard and working together. It's Coming of Age and Hero's Journey, all themes that never get old because they're really good themes. KnY isn't even that fresh of a take if you boil it down to this, but it didn't need to reinvent the wheel, it just needed to be a good wheel to keep the story going.

I was grateful it ended when it did, it had a goal to accomplish and everything in the story worked toward that goal. I've fallen away from adventure shounen because I can never stay interested in super long series that get mercilessly extended past their natural life as cash cows. Not to sound like a Swamp Demon here, but this manga got to end while it was still young and beautiful.

The fighting mechanisms are complex enough to be fun to explore, but it's not as complicated as other shounen series, making the barrier to entry lower for first-time anime viewers. That's part of why I think it's been so successful. Plus, even though we get things like Red Blades and Marks later, their existence as ultimate techniques was in place from the start, so they felt believably set up and paid off. They made sense within the world building, even if they had to be dropped on the readers later so as to weekly serialization interesting.

It tackles deep themes, but doesn't overcomplicate them. Muzan being a simple villain and Tanjiro simply being good-hearted created interesting tension just fine, the motivations throughout the cast keep the story nicely driven.

- Depth

Although the story, world, and characters are simple enough for people of all ages and familiarity with anime to enjoy, if you want to scratch deeper than the surface level, the hundreds of thousands of words of meta and cultural background throughout my blog go to show that it's very, very easy to bury yourself deeper in it. In my case I already have years of obsession with Japanese culture to build on, so KnY fit very nicely into my niche. I already love samurai and oni and swords and such so that was already playing to my knowledge, but as a passionate nerd, it's also given me lots and lots of exciting new material to learn more about. But more about that later, suffice to say here that Gotouge is a very, very knowledgeable gator.

- Characters

THEY ARE JUST GOOD AND FUN AND UNIQUE DESIGNS IN THE FIRST PLACE, but also, I don’t feel like I already know these characters from other anime. Many of them defy being typecast, and even the ones that do feel like like other characters in a plethora of anime have such a unique spin to make them stand out in my heart. I'm sure I could be a nerd for plenty of other series, but it takes the right characters to make a fangirl.

Also, my emotions got manipulated excellently; I like Tanjiro and immediately wanted to root for him, but I ha-a-a-ated most of the rest of the cast until I got to spend a teeny-tiny bit more time with them, and then I liked them hopelessly. I got totally strung along and I love it when I can get strung along like this.

Why do I like it so much?

A lot of that comes down to my personal recipe of brain soup and the situation I already felt stuck in by the time I got into KnY, a few months prior to the pandemic. Watching the anime and feeling really into it came as a comfort while I was finding myself in what felt more like a situation than a good career move and feeling frustrated with the second draft of a novel which wasn't working. Then just as I had hoped there might be some improvements to my situation which I was holding out for, the pandemic changed everyone's plans.

Simply put, the isolation and stress in those early stages of the pandemic both gave me lots of time to explore and write fanfic and made me rely a lot on the joy I got out of KnY, and then I got so practiced at making KnY fanwork that this blog became like my bonsai I could cultivate in peace while most other things in life have continued to feel out of control. And dang it, I'm good at cultivating this bonsai of a blog! It's gratifying to feel good at something when real life is making you feel otherwise!

Hopefully the upcoming new start in a new city and in a new job that'll hopefully make me feel good at things again and provide some smidge more control over my life will make me less reliant on KnY for such a big share of my happy hormones, but...

THE HYPE IS PART OF WHAT I LOVE

IT IS

SO MUCH FUN BEING OBSESSED WITH A MAINSTREAM PHENOMENON

THERE ARE THINGS THAT MAKE ME HAPPY EVERYWHERE

I SAY THESE CHARACTER NAMES AND EVERYONE KNOWS WHO I'M TALKING ABOUT AND THIS HAS NEVER HAPPENED TO ME

IT STAYS ON MY BRAIN BECAUSE IT IS EVERYWHERE

AND THIS IS SO COOL

[gladrial]

The 90s X-Men cartoon was the beginning of my journey into fandoms. While I can point to earlier fandoms I was into as a child, I did not fully understand what that meant: what kind of rabbit holes I could dive into and communities I could be a part of until X-Men. It laid the foundation. So when I found out that they were going to do a continuation on the show, it may surprise you to know that I thought it was a bad idea.

At the time, the show was truly groundbreaking, with its continuing story that built over time and its focus on the characters’ interpersonal relationship. However, while I still enjoy watching it for nostalgia sake, I find its telenovela style very dated. The narrative often holds up, but the delivery does not.

I suspected this new season was going to give us some better animation and action sequences, but, being forced to keep within the style of its predecessor, wasn’t really going to work. It would be fun for nostalgia’s sake and some action-packed scenes, but nothing more.

And after watching the first episode, I felt it was exactly what I expected it would be. A lot of style, little substance. A lot of nostalgia, little new to build on. Many a ‘we did the thing you remember’ and ‘we said the line from the show.’ It was fine, but it didn’t particularly excite me.

That said, the second episode is absolute fire and left me yearning for more. Despite the melodrama, it somehow still worked for reasons I can’t quite explain. I would like to try my best to articulate what worked for me, what didn’t, and what I would like to see in the future.

Lots of spoilers ahead.

Positives:

- Getting to view the power levels of these characters as they were meant to be again has been such a treat. Live action can be held back in so many ways, be it time, money, or striving for something with more realism. But I prefer seeing the possibilities that often only animation can give us. Cyclops and Storm’s power sets both really stood out in these two episodes and it was a joy to behold.

- The action in general is much better obviously with the improvements we’ve seen in animation and the amount of backing this show has received.

- Jubilee’s dance sequence was oh so pretty.

- The look on Logan’s face when Jean went into labor was priceless.

- Storm, my queen, has gotten to shine in ways she hasn’t in the mainstream in years. In decades! And I’m not just referring to the ‘give them the forecast’ scene (which was epic), but every single scene she occupied. They showed her at her fiercest and her most vulnerable. They showed Storm the warrior and Storm the friend. “Do not think. Be silent, heed my commands and you shall survive.” - Yes queen. Whatever you say queen.

- Magneto! I love everything about every scene he is in. Yes, even those scenes. Especially those scenes, you cowards! (We’ll touch on that later. Pun intended.) I love how he’s striving to honor Xavier’s wishes while still clearly not being onboard and not even trying to hide it. He’s making the attempt, but not willing to let another man’s ideals compromise him as made poignant by the “Do not make me let you down” line, while he’s literally dangling his judges in the air. Perfection! Yes, this may all go sideways, but it will be on them if it does. Not him. He’s the most dangerous man in any room and not afraid to let you know it, even when he’s playing nice.

- The Rogue/Gambit/Magneto love triangle got me feeling feels! I saw a hint of something when Rogue defended Magneto’s presence to the chagrin of Gambit, but never thought they’d go as far with it as they did, especially in one episode. To everyone upset, I see you. I hear you. It’s going to be okay. We all know Rogue and Gambit are endgame. Calm down. Rogue doesn’t owe Remy anything (and vice versa). They are obviously very attracted to each other, but the relationship has purposefully been kept surface level by her. Rogue has set a precedent that she enjoys the flirtation, but has a history of shutting him down beyond that, so he’s kept to those rules. She does it to protect them both, not just physically, but emotionally. Then she gets the joy of helping her friend give birth to a child she’ll never conceive with a husband she believes she’ll never have…but back home there’s a man she has a history with. A man she respects. A man with charisma and charm. And it just so happens to literally be the only person she can touch. I do not blame the woman and neither should you. And Xmen has always been about the drama. Everyday, every way, all the time drama. If you don’t want drama, you’re watching the wrong show.

- Xmen has always been woke as hell. It’s kind of their whole deal. But it’s ever so nice that they don’t have to put on kid gloves while making their points anymore. To be fair, it was very progressive at the time, as much as it could have been. But I appreciate that they’ve upped the ante even more.

Negatives:

- Continuity is huge in this show, and since they insisted on continuing where it left off, you have to heed to that continuity. That means I shouldn’t see Angel in any pictures of the original Xmen (in this iteration), but that's a minor example compared to completely subverting the final episode. Xavier did not die and, while I might understand everyone acting as though he has in public for a variety of reasons, they continue to do so in private, which makes no sense. Additionally, Magneto was handed over the reins in the finale, so no one should be shocked that he’s there. Narratively it’s more dramatic, sure, but it’s not accurate for a show that has historically strived to keep continuity.

- The animation is better obviously, but not as good as it could be… Something looks off in a way that I can’t put my finger on, but I suspect that it has something to do with getting too modern with it would be too jarring from the original series.

- Cyclops fretting about leaving after losing Xavier makes sense. His uncertainty about who will lead in his absence does not. Storm is right there. She’s right there and the groundwork has been put in place for her to take on the role of leadership since season one. Instead, imagine the impact of Cyclops agreeing it was time to step back only for Storm to have been stripped of her powers and walk away, making him second guess whether he should stay.

- Look. I’m not sure why I have to say this, but even back in the 90s, a grown man going ‘NOT!’ was cringe as hell. It’s even more so now. Of all the callbacks, why that one? Bad joke then and bad joke now.

- I love that Magneto does something pragmatic for the Morlocks. His comments to the Xmen in regards to it would have been more than justified if not for the fact that they had been offered sanctuary at the mansion and declined it. Someone in the room should have brought that up.

- I respect Magneto handing himself over to authorities in a ‘I’ll play along’ sort of way. We all know if things didn’t go his way, he would have just turned the tables on them. To that end…I find it very hard to swallow that he’d voluntarily let them collar him. ‘Yes, yes, you may walk me around in your silly little handcuffs. I’ll play along. But I’ll be damned if I let you neuter me.’

- Granted this next one is a nit-pick, but…why didn’t they wait for Storm to get the mohawk until after she lost her powers? She first got the look after she’d been depowered in the comics as part of her learning to cope with the change. It gave her some feeling of control over something when she felt like she didn’t have control over anything. She lost her abilities in the second episode, so it’s not like they would have had to wait long. It’s a great look, don’t get me wrong, just feels like it could have added to the narrative more if they waited. (Update: I was incorrect about the order of events in the comics as pointed out in the replies. It’s a lot of lore to keep up with. Probably projected this narrative into my memory as a youngster. Apologies.)

What I’d like to see:

There’s one thing in particular that’s bugging me. I could probably write a book about why Wolverine is so beloved and, honestly, one of my favorite fictional characters. The 90s cartoon introduced me to him, but there was so much to explore beyond that. He’s one of the best studies in character development that I’ve ever had the pleasure to immerse myself in. This comes from having one person in control of your narrative for seventeen years, a luxury rarely found in the medium of comic books, but one he was fortunate enough to receive. We learn why he’s so guarded and little by little see his defenses being chipped away. Oh, maybe some of these people are okay. Oh, maybe I can call them friends. Oh, maybe they’re strong enough to protect themselves and I won’t lose this bunch like I’ve lost everything else. Oh, maybe I can call them family. Oh, maybe I’m good for something other than violence. Oh, maybe I can nurture this person. Oh, maybe I can help guide this man’s vision that I believe in so much because finally someone saw that I could be more. Oh, maybe I can be the one that carries on his mantle and passes his vision on to the next generation.

He is the best there is at what he does and, despite what he may believe, sometimes what he does is so goddamn beautiful.

I’m ready to see that Wolverine. I’m ready for the Wolverine in this show to grow up. I’m ready for him to get over the most boring woman in the room. Again, Storm’s right there! Or someone else. Or no one else. I honestly don’t care. Grow up. Stop constantly moping. Become more. It’s time. He deserves it. We deserve it. Give it to me. I want it.

[nicejewishcharactershowdown]

Nice Jewish Character Showdown 2023 -- Round One Eliminations

Well folks, the first round of the 2023 event has concluded, and 16 hopefuls have been taken out of the running for this year's crown. While we wait for the polls to go live for round two, let's take a second to debrief with those contenders, and break down what makes them such Nice Jewish Characters.

Match One Elimination: James Wilson, House MD Apologies to the House MD fans who kept trying to push the vote in your guy's favor, I honestly did not expect 9 to have such a high turnout (I'll elaborate on his inclusion another time). I'm going to make my way around to watching this show eventually I promise, in the meantime all I can reference to validate his Judaism is the textual reference to his Judaism in dialogue, the enthusiasm from my Jewish mutuals, and his entry on Jew or Not Jew (which, although considerably dated, was a popular site for me and my Hebrew School peers to browse between classes).

Match Two Elimination: Susan Ivanova, Babylon 5 While I haven't watched Babylon 5, I was pleasantly surprised to discover just how Jewish this Trek-adjacent show is, at least, in terms of canonicity. The second in command of the titular ship, Ivanova is textually Ashkenazi, Russian specifically. I can't speak on specifics since I, again, haven't watched the show, but it sounds like her relationship with her ancestry is tied significantly into her personal plot arc, as she reconnects with it over the seasons.

Match Three Elimination: Avigdor, Yentl Oh, Mandy Patinkin, the communal zeyde of the Jewish internet. While Avigdor may not be the Nicest of Jewish Characters, we gotta remember dramatic context! And yes, the absolute Gender of Yentl is no small factor in his popularity. I don't regret the picture I used, but I'm sure he would have had a bit of a swing vote if I used the picture of him wet and shirtless. Ah, well. Not like this is the first time Yentl's been snubbed for awards season.

Match Four Elimination: Samwise Gamgee, Lord of the Rings Yes, the books have the unfortunate way they've reflected on antisemitic stereotypes with the portrayal of the dwarves. But when you look at the hobbits, don't they feel like citizens of a shtetl? Aren't you filled with the warmth of shabbos when you think about a hobbit hole? And when thinking about Samwise's unending hope for good, even in the darkest parts of the journey, are you not reminded of something?

Match Five Elimination: George Costanza, Seinfeld Yeah I knew this one was going to infuriate some people. George Costanza, you textually Jewish in every way but literal prince, you are the perfect example of the transitive property of Jewish media (Jason Alexander has been quoted as saying that Costanza is Jewish because he's being played by a Jewish actor). Doing readings on invisible Jewish representation through the lens of Seinfeld (and the associated eras of television) is FASCINATING, btw.

Match Six Elimination: Schmidt, New Girl A very Jewish cast and crew brought this 2010's icon to our screens, and while the humor might not have always been the kindest to his Jewish identity, it's no surprise that he has such a continuing popularity within the former viewing audience. Someone get him a cookie, please?

Match Seven Elimination: Cher Horowitz, Clueless Written by a Jew, directed by a Jew, played by a Jew, Cher Horowitz is a great example of the transitive property of Jewish media. Plus, with a last name like Horowitz and a lawyer father, there are plenty of reasons to interpret the 90's darling as such. This Kveller article is full of fun facts about the Jewish background of the production!

Match Eight Elimination: Barbara Millicent Roberts, Barbie Watch Tiny Shoulders if you don't think Barbie belonged in this showdown. Barbara Millicent Roberts, you've been so popularized and Americanized that we've forgotten your roots, my darling! Ruth Handler, Barbie's creator, comes from a distinctly Jewish background, and her family's Ellis Island history is a good way of looking at the way Barbie's been assimilated. Sure she's got her Christmas-y ties, but most Christmas media comes from us anyways, so I think she can get a pass.

Match Nine Elimination: The Baudelaires, A Series of Unfortunate Events Okay, I'll admit it, I never read ASOUE. It freaked me out too much as a kid, and I've never circled back to it. But it's been on the back of my mind for a while, and now that I'm aware of just how Jewish the source material is, I'm this close to looking up the audiobooks on Libby. This is a step above the transitive property of Jewish media, this is textual. I guess it's characteristic for the Baudelaires to lose, but they can be comforted in how close the vote was.

Match Ten Elimination: Tommy Pickles, Rugrats So I grew up with public access television, and when I finally got cable it felt a bit like I'd missed the boat on Rugrats, age-group wise. But seeing the VHS cases on the library shelves of my synagogue, I always knew that show was a good case of Jewish representation. The Rugrats was revolutionary in their central Judaism in children's media: not just giving it to a side character for special episodes, but giving it to the main character and spending ample time discussing it. Consider putting the Passover or Hannukah specials into your holiday circulation.

Match Eleven Elimination: The Strilondes, Homestuck Somewhat surprising to me, but not really since they lost round one last time, the Strilondes have been taken out of the running. What makes Dave Strider and Rose Lalonde Jewish? Siblings through manipulation of genetic cloning, we witness a Very Jewish Wedding in the Snapchat Credits Sequence to Homestuck, where Rose and her wife, Kanaya, are in the center of a horah dance, lifted above the crowd in chairs (here's the timestamp). Besides that, Homestuck can be interpreted through a very Jewish lens (at least to me, someone who has a John Egbert statuette on their bookshelf). Plus, Homestuck has an answer to the Great Frog Debate (their answer is the biggest frog possible).

Match Twelve Elimination: Frankenstein('s Monster), Frankenstein Sorry Adam, I know losing twice in a row is hard, but to be fair you DID go up against werewolves last time. Why is Adam Frankenstein('s Monster) Jewish? He has a complicated relationship with the concept of a higher power (and in his case, a complicated familial relationship with his own creator). Plus, when I look at him, I see the most famous golem in pop culture. Jewish Frankenstein supremacy <3 (Oh, and while I'm thinking about it, a general plug for the book version of Monster High, published in 2010, which has a VERY Jew-coded interpretation of the titular monsters, imo.)

Match Thirteen Elimination: The Baker, Into The Woods Musical theater is inherently Jewish, so is it any surprise that a Sondheim character made it to the showdown? Into the Woods is a masterpiece, and when you look at it through a Jewish lens it gets even more so -- especially in the second act. The Baker is one of several characters in the show that really become aware of the constraints of their fairy tale lives, and choose to circumvent them. I'm going to restrain myself from discussing it more since the entire original cast recording is available to watch here, and it's one of my favorite musicals ever so I'd just get incoherent in further analysis if you haven't seen the source material.

Match Fourteen Elimination: Will Byers, Stranger Things I knew this was going to happen on the #CecilSweep website, but it still hurts a little bit to see Will Byers lose with such a sweep. Maybe it's the fact the Byers house has readily available Christmas lights. Why was he a contestant? Well, observing the transitive property of Jewish media (as discussed earlier), Noah Schnapp AND Winona Ryder's Judaism is more than enough to validate a Jewish reading of the Byers family -- in my mind, they're a mixed household, and kept celebrating Xmas after Lonnie left because the kids grew up with it (plus, they're in Indiana in the 80's, so...)

Match Fifteen Elimination: The Lorax, The Lorax Did you go to Hebrew School in the United States if you didn't watch or read The Lorax for Tu B'ishvat? I mentioned the VHS library at my synagogue earlier, and this tape was a standard on the wheelie box tv set-up, often used to distract the younger kids who would get bored at the High Holy Days services. He's just a lil' man who loves the trees, that's a mensch to me.

Match Sixteen Elimination: Worf, Star Trek: The Next Generation I feel like I have to apologize for putting the two Trek characters against each other up front. It's another place where my textual knowledge slips a bit, so when I found out just how Jewish Worf is I was pleasantly surprised. Trek has a very odd relationship with just how Jewish it has been since conception (thank you, Nimoy!) , so for Worf's parents to be all but declared to be Jewish is like. You could have just made them Jewish. Why didn't you make them Jewish (we know why).