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#it was funny too because at the same time as she had that I had watched a bunch of pointcrow videos
leah-lover · 3 days
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Sketches. Mapi x Ingrid x reader.
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Summary: what happens when Ingrid and mapi discover the sketches r drew of them.
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Doom scrolling on your phone after practice was your favorite activity of the day. You would come home exhausted, throw your kitbag in the hallway, and cocoon in your coach for about an hour.
Today was no different. You got home and did the same thing. You opened TikTok, and scrolled half mindedly. One video though grabbed your attention. It was a tik tok from the official page of Barcelona where your teammates were asked to describe you in a few words.
Cata was the first to answer and she did so by describing you as quiet. It was fair you didn't talk much if at all. It's not that you weren't comfortable enough with the team, you were just a quiet person. Irene was next and she called you kind which put a smile on your face. All your teammates called you different versions of sweet, kind, funny, quiet, and shy. You found their words endearing and it almost brought you to tears. This reaction quickly went away after you heard what mapi described you. “ Talented artist.” your face turned white and your heartbeat was accelerating. Her answer was followed by Ingrid who described you as an “ impressive painter.”
You dropped your phone quickly. “ No it can't be. No no no no. Fuck!!” You got up from the couch and tried to keep yourself busy. You put away your kit bag, did laundry , cleaned the house surprisingly thoroughly. You even meal prepped. all of this so that you wouldn't think about that video, their response, and what most likely saw.
Your alarm found you awake for the first time since the champion’s league final which spoke greatly to the anxiety you were experiencing. The thought of being face to face with them knowing that they know your secret terrified you but had to go to training so you did, and your mission was to get through the day without making contact with them because if you did you would either cry or throw up and that wasn't an option.
“ Nena what's wrong?” Asked Alexia at the meeting room.
“ Nothing capi everything is good.” You say trying to contain your tears. That's when she held your hand and redirected her focus to the coach. She rubbed her thumb across your knuckles once in a while. Once the meeting was over she pulled you gently out of the room and to a different room.
“ We are not getting out of this room until you tell me what is wrong.” Alexia looked so gentle, caring and a little bit worried. But you couldn't tell her what was wrong.
“ Nena I love you and I care about you deeply. Your anxiety is clearly through the roof. Just let me help you. We decided that you would let me help, remember.” She put her hand on your shoulder and desperately waited for an answer.
Alexia was like a big sister to you. She helped you survive your time in Barca but your issue right now was within the team not the pressure or the limelight and you know there was nothing to fix it.
“ I want a transfer. I want to leave Barcelona. I want to leave. “ You close your eyes so that you won't cry.
“ It's okay pequena everything is gonna be okay. I can fix this, whatever this is I can fix it. Trust me.” She pulled you in for a hug. Your anxiety was through the roof and the voices in your head were screaming vile and scary things at you.
“ I want to leave ale. I am serious.” You try to say sturnely.
“ You are one of your best strikers. We need you now more than ever if we want to quadruple again. And we do so you are staying.” She just held you as you cried some more.
Once you calmed down you apologized to Alexia. “ I guess you aren't gonna tell me right?” she asked again.
“ It's just about a stupid video.” You tried to stop the words as they were coming out of your mouth but it was too late.
“What video?” She asked suspiciously.
“ A video posted by the Barca page. It's nothing to worry about. Sorry capi, I didn't mean to freak out.”
“ It's fine Nena if you don't feel like training you can go home. “ She proposed after realizing you won't say anything.
“ Yeah I think that is a good idea.” You went to the locker room, grabbed your bag and left. Alexia then pulled out her phone and searched for the video you were talking about. She watched it 3 times and her teamates’s answers seemed fine, but she got suspicious of mapi and Ingrid's answers so she went to talk to them.
“ Maria, Ingrid, I need to talk to you.” Demanded the captain. They complied and waited for her at the side of the pitch.
“ Where is Nena?” Asked mapi.
“ That's what I am here to talk to you about. She went home now. I just managed to calm her down but she isn't okay. She was crying and she said she wanted a transfer from this team. She also said something about a video the social media team posted. I didn't understand anything.” Mapi and Ingrid gave one another a look they both understood. They knew what troubled you and they felt bad for it.
“ Don't worry about it ale. We will make things right, I promise you.” Said Ingrid.
“So you did something wrong. You hurt her somehow” Alexia started to frown with anger.
“ Ale calm down, I will tell you everything just not now. Everything will be alright tomorrow.”
“Well it better fucking be or you will answer to me.” added the captain before leaving.
When you arrived home your head was pounding because of the crying so you headed straight to your bedroom, got under the covers and slept almost immediately, too tired to do anything else. You only woke up when your phone was buzzing under your pillow.
“ Hola” you answered without checking who is calling.
“ Hola Nena, I need you to open the door. We are standing outside.” Said a familiar voice.
You put your phone to the side and went straight to your door not realizing what you were doing.
Once you opened the door, your eyes opened wide, surprised at who was at your door. You stood there like a statue trying desperately to calm the voices in your head.
“Nena , please let us in, we need to talk to you.” said ingrid in the gentlest voice you ever heard.
You couldn't kick them out so you stepped aside and let them get in. By the time you got to the living room your heart was beating very fast, each breath was harder and harder and the walls around you started to close in on you. Mapi was the first one to notice so she came running towards you. She took your hand, guided you to the couch and started to construct you to take deep breaths.
“ I am gonna leave. Transfer window is in 2 weeks so the coach has enough time to secure a deal with a new team. Even if they dont we can fake an injury for the media and I can just stay home until the summer where we can look again for another deal. You don't have to worry about anything. I won't cause any problems i swear. . ” you say once you get your breath back.
“ nena why do you think anybody wants you to leave?” askes ingrid.
“ I know you think I am a creep, I understand that. I don't want to cause any problems within the team so I am leaving.” you try to say as calmly as you can.
“ nena we don't think you are creepy.” replied mapi. You look at them with confusion. What if you understood everything all wrong? what if you had jumped to false confusion? What if this was all a misunderstanding from you part?
“ You said in that video that I draw really well. I never showed you any of my drawings so that means that you saw them.” you try to piece everything together.
They both look at eachother hesitantly before ingrid starts talking.
“ The other day in the locker room you wanted to talk to the physio and left your ipad open, that's when I saw a drawing of myself and I zoomed out to see the full picture. I then accidentally swiped and saw that you drew a few portraits of me and mapi separately and together.” you knew that they saw the portraits, but hearing the words come out of ingrid’s mouth made the situation much worse for you. Those drawings were something sacred and intimate to you. You expressed your every thought through them. They were your safe space and they gave solace. But now they have changed into a nightmare that would force you to leave your favorite place in the world.
“ Did you see all of them?” your voice seemed to have shrunk and as you ask the question staring at the floor.
“ yes but we don't think it's creepy. We think it's beautiful that you drew us.” mapi didn't know what to say. She was afraid that she said the wrong thing and made the situation worse.
“ mapi you saw 79 portraits of you and your girlfriend on my ipad. Very detailed portraits of the two of you that I drew when I was near you in the meeting room or training or the dinner hall or even my own bedroom and you don't think that that’s a little bit sick.” you ask the question sarcastically.
“ No we don't. look we didn't come here to fight with you or reprimand you we….” you didn't let ingrid finish her sentence, you instead got up, grabbed your ipad and displayed the portraits for them.
“ You seriously don't think this portrait is creepy.” you show them a portrait you drew of them kissing. You weren't thinking of how embarrassing this moment was, you were trying to convince yourself that they hate you because it was better than the alternative. “ Look, I hate myself for this more than you could ever hate me. That's why I want to leave. I am not going to make you feel uncomfortable anymore. “
“ can you please just shut up for a moment. We don't hate you, we don't find you creepy, we liked what we saw, and we think you are very talented. Please don't turn this into something it's not. And please don't ask for a transfer.” mapi didn't mean for her words to come out like that but she couldn't stand seeing the hurt on your face.
“ Look what Maria means to say is that it's all good with us. You don't have to worry about anything and that we are sorry we brought it up in the first place.” ingrid then extended her arms and offered you a hug which you took. You hugged her and mapi again as they left your apartment. Once you found yourself alone in your house again you grabbed your ipad and smashed it to the ground cracking the screen. You left it there on the ground and went straight to bed.
While you slept soundly the couple were the ones that would stay awake late at night.
' you shouldn't have said it like that maria.’ reprimanded ingrid.
“ What did you want me to do? I couldn't just sit there and let her insult herself.” defended mapi.
“ I don't think we handled it right. We should have talked to her more.”
“ you have seen her when she closes herself off. You can't break through when she does that. Once she convinced herself with something you can't undo it. And now she convinced herself that we hate her which isn't true.”
“ We have to find a way to convince her otherwise. She can't leave.”
“ she won't, amor.”
The next day was travel day and you were the first on that bus. You sat in the front, put on your head phones and closed your eyes. The team knew from alexia not to bother you and alexia was informed by ingrid and mapi to let them handle your situation.
You didn't hear anybody get on the bus, you only realized what was happening when the bus started moving. You weren't bothered for the first 20 minutes of the ride but that didn't last long because somebody snatched an airpod from your ear.
“ No iPad today?” asked a smiling mapi who sat next to you . Ingrid sat in front of you.
“ No, I gave that up.”
“ It's a shame you were very good at it.” she responded.
“ Since when did you start drawing?” asked ingrid.
“ since I was a kid. My therapist used to encourage me to do it because I wasn't so good at expressing what i am feeling.”
“ and these drawings help you express your feelings?” you knew what ingrid was getting to and you didn't want to go there so you went for your phone to try and increase the volume of the airpod left in your ear but ingrid’s hand got to it first.
“ Yesterday we were scared that we would say the wrong thing. But today I would rather say the wrong thing than lose you nena.” what ingrid said shocked you.
“ So you were saying that drawing helps you express things right?” continues mapi.
“ yeah. I am not very good at words. I never was so I drew all the words I couldn't say. “
“ Do you have your ipad with you?” asked ingrid.
“ No, I don't have an ipad anymore i smashed it yesterday.”
“ why?”
“ because….” you were quickly interrupted by mapi “ don't you dare say it's creepy.”
A staff member interrupts your conversation by putting an envelope on the table.
“ room 1209, 3 beds like you asked.” she said looking at mapi.
“ What did you do?” you ask confused.
“ I am making sure you are not leaving.”
The bus stopped so you couldn't continue the conversation. You weren't left any room to protest the decision that was made for you as the couple were more stubborn than you are.
Once you got in the room you were hit with the reality that you were going to have to sleep in the same room as them.
“ mapi i can't stay here.”
“ why not?”
“ You know the reason why.”
“ No we dont.” said ingrid.
“ Please don't make me go through this. I promise I won't leave, just please don't make me.”
“ I don't understand why you are so upset right now. We are just going to share a room.
The couple knew that playing dumb would anger you enough that you would start talking. The melancholic look on their faces hit the nail on the head.
“ i cant be here because of the same reason i drew those fucking drawing.. I tried to get you out of my head by drawing you and fantasizing about you but i can't stay stop whatever i am feeling from coming out when i'm sleeping and you are cuddling next to me.”
“ Why would that bother you?” they continued to play on your built up anger.
“ It bothers me because I want to be in the middle of you. I want to be with you. That's why I drew you, that's why I fantasize about it and that's why I can't sleep here.” you weren't realizing what you were saying not until you said it and it hit you like a truck.
Suddenly , you see the couple moving two beds together, taking off their shoes, and laying on the bed. Ingrid then taps on the space between them calling you over.
“ you gotta be fucking kidding me?” you say.
“ We knew what you felt the day we saw you drawing but we thought we were just reaching or projecting our feelings towards you. Since yesterday we were trying to get you to admit your feelings so that we would do too but you kept on insulting yourself which was nice by the way so we resulted in playing dumb which clearly worked. “ said mapi.
“ We care about you, we don't want to lose you. We don't have to figure out everything right now so just come and lay with us please. “ added ingrid.
You were moving on autopilot when you took off your shoes and layed in the middle of the bed between them . you stared at ingrid’s eyes for long time before you moved or spoke.
“ Your eyes are so beautiful I could never capture them in a drawing.” you then look over at mapi “ and you smile i don't think i have never seen it up close. This is too much.” you try to get up but they stop you.
“ We don't have to do anything right now.” mapi handed you a notebook and a pen.
“ Why don't you draw this moment now.” you take the pen and the biggest smile spreads on your face as you get up, look at them, and start drawing as they admired you.
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softspiderling · 1 day
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like, ever | j.v
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summary:
“Hey, I’m worried about you.”
You glanced up from your laptop screen to see Rhaena standing in your doorway, her arms crossed.
“Why?”
She gave you a look, before her eyes roamed your room: your textbooks stacked half-hazardly on your desk, two empty ice cream tubs, another half melted one on your nightstand, an empty tissue box on the floor and you on your bed, wrapped in your blanket like a burrito.
OR; You and Jace break up because of a stupid reason, but you’re both too proud to apologize.
pairing: jacaerys velaryon x reader
warnings: kinda toxic behavior from both of them, but like the usual issues in communication that’s so common in people our age idk what to tell you
word count: 4,1k
author’s note: modern au!jace is the president of the frat Alpha Draconis (it's co-ed, Rhaenyra was president during her time at uni), Jace/Aegon/Baela and their respective siblings are all cousins, but this is NOT in the same universe as can I go (where you go). thank you to my wonder sister wife beta @eldrith as usual <3
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
“We broke up.”
“No you didn’t.”
“Yes, we did.”
Baela gave you a look, narrowing her eyes at you as she pushed her Econ 1 assignment away. You dropped down on the couch next to her, leaning your head back.
“Why?”
“I don’t wanna talk about it,” you huffed and Baela whacked you in the arm.
“You just came home and dropped a bomb like that, you can’t just not talk about it.”
“Not talk about what?”
You internally groaned when Helaena’s voice floated from the hallway, the front door shutting behind her. An intervention was inevitable at this point. At least Rhaena wasn’t home yet, you knew she was volunteering until six.
“She and Jace broke up,” Baela told her and Helaena paused in the doorway to the living room, a frown on her face as she undid her braid.
“You didn’t.”
“That’s what I said!”
“You know, normal friends would offer ice cream if their friend was going through a break up.”
“I’d offer you ice cream if you were sad,” Helaena pointed out. She sat down next to you, patting your shoulder. “You don’t look sad.”
“Well, I am sad,” you sniffed, but Baela fixed her brown eyes at you until you threw your hands up in frustration. “Fine! I’m mostly mad, okay? Pissed off, actually!”
Baela folded her legs under herself. “Tell us what happened.”
“I don’t know, she just rubs me the wrong way. It’s like she knows you have a girlfriend and she chooses to ignore that.”
You and Jace were laying in his bed, your head on his chest. He had been telling you about the new pledges of the term, and you weren’t exactly fond of one of them - Laura, a nursing major. You were aware of her being especially touchy with Jace, twirling her hair while she was talking to him and always searching him out at every event. Which was fair, he was the president of the frat after all and at first you had told yourself that you were just projecting but the you noticed that she was laughing at all of Jace’s jokes. She was definitely into him. He was not that funny.
“I don’t know, it’s just the way she is, I think,” he said, and you frowned at him.
“Jace, come on, she’s totally into you.”
“Well, good thing I’m into you,” Jace pointed out, turning his head to nose along your neck but you pushed him away, starting to get annoyed that he wasn’t taking this seriously.
“I mean it, Jace.”
“So do I,” he answered, irritated. “Why does this bother you so much?”
“Because I don’t like another girl’s hands being all over you?”
You sat up, leaning away from him with a frown and he only sighed, laying his head back on the pillow, shutting his eyes. He was starting to piss you off.
“She’s not into me! Everyone tries to butter me up because they want to join the frat. And even if she was, why does it matter?”
“It matters because it bothers me and you clearly don’t care!”
“Of course I care,” Jace sighed. He opened his eyes, reaching out for you, and you had to admit your resolve was starting to crumble. “You’re overreacting.”
And just like that, the wall was back up.
“Wow, thanks.”
Your voice was biting as you spoke, tugging your hand out of his grasp and standing up, grabbing your hoodie. Jace was quick to follow you, brows furrowed. Great, now both of you were mad.
“You’re making a big deal out of nothing!” Jace snapped and you only glared at him.
“Thanks for invalidating my feelings, Jacaerys,” you said sarcastically. “If I’m making a deal out of nothing, maybe we’re both nothing.”
Jace’s face fell and he stopped in his tracks, letting out a huff. “You don’t mean that.”
Maybe you didn’t. But you weren’t about to backtrack now. You were a woman of your words.
“Yes, I do.”
You pulled the door open and rushed out of his room, slamming the door shut behind you. Distantly, you could hear Jace call after you and you secretly hoped he would chase after you, but by the time you made it downstairs to the front door, he was still nowhere to be seen.
“That’s…”
Baela and Helaena exchanged a look and you frowned at them. While you hadn’t expected for them to immediately spring into assuring you that they were on your side - you were dating their cousin after all - you also didn’t quite imagined them being so… Shocked.
“What?” you asked, suddenly growing insecure. “I had a point.”
“Well, yeah,” Baela started, “But so did he.”
“Why did you immediately jump into breaking up?” Helaena asked with a soft voice, the voice you knew she used when she didn’t want to hurt your feelings. You lifted your shoulders, then dropped them again, unable to answer her question.
“Did you want to break up?”
“No!”
You tucked your chin against your chest, a pit forming in your stomach. Did you maybe overreact?
“I was just mad,” you said, frowning, picking at the hem of your shirt.
“.. And you wanted to hurt him?” Baela said, finishing your sentence. Your head shot up, a denial on your lips, but your mouth closed when her words sunk in.
“… Maybe.”
“You two really are hotheaded and stubborn,” Helaena pointed out, wrapping an arm around your shoulders. You only glowered, the anger from earlier dissipating and instead was replaced by misery and a little bit of guilt? Luckily, Helaena and Baela left you to your wallowing after they realized you needed some space and you fled to your bedroom, trying to bury yourself in your assignments.
There was only one slight problem. You couldn’t find school bag anywhere.
“Where did I leave it?” you muttered to yourself, checking under your desk for your bag, even opening the drawer for good measure. You were crawling on the floor looking under your bed when it finally dawned on you.
“Fuck.”
You had gone over to the frat’s house right after class, with your school bag. And after the fight, you must have forgotten to grab it.
“Ugh,” you groaned, dropping your forehead on the floor You’d rather crawl under your bed and sleep with the dust bunnies that have been collecting under there than go back to the frat house right now. But you had no choice. The assignment was was due the day after tomorrow and Professor Cole already was in a bad mood because his date went badly.
“Fuck me,” you muttered to yourself, turning to lay on your bad and cursed the Gods for making you miserable as you stared at the ceiling, collecting your wits.
“Oh.”
Luke Velaryon, Jace’s younger AND biological brother, stood in the doorway, apprehensive. He had always been the more sensitive one between the two brothers, but he was also unwaveringly loyal. You had no doubt that Jace had already told him everything about your fight.
“Hey Luke,” you said, giving him a wry smile.
“Hey,” he replied hesitantly. “Jace is not here.”
“I know.”
Luke pressed his lips together, his eyes darting around as if he was expecting his older brother to come out of the bushes any second. “Are you okay?”
You let out a small laugh, shaking your head. What a sweet boy.
“Yeah, alright enough I guess,” you replied, sighing. “Listen, I forgot my bag in Jace’s room and I really need it to do an assignment, could you let me in?”
“I don’t know….” Luke answered slowly. “Jace should be back soon though. Maybe you can just wait until he gets back? And then you guys could talk?”
Bless him.
You bit on your lip, running your hand through your hair, exasperated. “Listen Luke, I really appreciate you trying to look out for Jace, but I really can’t see him right now.”
Luke exhaled, shifting on his feet like he was undecided. The longer it took for him to decide, the higher chances were you’d run into Jace on your way out.
“Please, Luke, I just need to grab my bag really quickly. He won’t even notice I was there.”
With a loud sigh, Luke finally nodded, opening the door wider and taking a step back.
“He’s gonna be back soon, you need to hurry up.”
“Thanks Luke!”
You hushed past him into the house, walking the familiar way up the stairs to Jace’s bedroom, shutting the door behind you. With a small sigh, you looked around, trying to discern your stuff from his. It was harder than you had first anticipated, your belongings strewn all over the room. Picking your favorite scrunchie off of his nightstand next to a picture of the two of you during New Year’s Eve, you put your hair up as you narrowed your eyes, feeling relief settle in your chest when you saw your backpack lean against the desk.
“Thank God”, you muttered, grabbing it quickly. Just as you headed to the door, hand on the door knob, you could hear voices down the hallway through the closed door. You cursed, recognizing it as Jace and Cregan.
Fuck.
Immediately, you let go of the door knob, taking a few steps back, trying to come up with a way you wouldn’t be caught standing in the middle of Jace’s bedroom. Did you have enough time to make the climb out of the window and scale down the roof?
“- it’ll blow over. I’ll give her some time to calm down and-”
Before you could make a decision, the door swung open, and Jace entered. He was looking back at Cregan, who raised his brows when he saw you in the middle of the room.
“Wha-?” Jace turned his head, his mouth dropping open. “… Hey.”
“Hey.”
Cregan glanced between the two of you, narrowing his eyes. Meanwhile, Jace was rubbing the back of his neck.
“Did you forget something?”
“Yeah,” you answered - LAME! - lifting your backpack.
Jace nodded slowly. “Was there anything you wanted to say?”
You frowned at him, confused.
“Like what?”
“I don’t know,” Jace said, shrugging with his shoulders. “I thought you were here to apologize.”
Cregan groaned, leaning his forehead against the door frame as you felt all the anger from before welling up again.
“Me apologize?” You repeated, your voice shrill. “What about you? I bet Laura’s thrilled to hear we broke up.”
“You just ended things for no reason! Laura’s not even into me!” Jace snapped and Cregan pushed himself off of the door frame.
“Maybe we all should just calm down.”
“Shut up, Cregan!” You and Jace yelled at the same time, your anger very briefly directed at Jace’s best friend.
Cregan flinched, raising his hands defensively. “Jesus, sorry. I’ll never try to help again,” he muttered. “Let me give you two a minute.”
He stepped out of the room but you held your hands up, stopping him with a scoff.
“No, I’m done here,” you huffed, shaking your head in disbelief. With one last angry look at Jace, you pushed between them, running out of the house, smoke coming out of your ears.
You spent the rest of the week distracting yourself. Burying yourself in assignments and reading, eating ice cream - there was a deal at Whole Foods, five for three, your freezer was full - and you only cried once.
“Hey, I’m worried about you.”
You glanced up from your laptop screen to see Rhaena standing in your doorway, her arms crossed.
“Why?”
She gave you a look, before her eyes roamed your room: your textbooks stacked half-hazardly on your desk, two empty ice cream tubs, another half melted one on your nightstand, an empty tissue box on the floor and you on your bed, wrapped in your blanket like a burrito. You sighed, letting the blankets fall from your shoulders.
“I’m fine, Rhae.”
“Hey, did you convince her to come?” Baela skidded to a halt next to Rhaena, looking from her sister to you. Rhaena only sighed while you narrowed your eyes at Baela’s get up. She was wearing black leather pants and a brown corset; she looked like she was going out.
“Come where?”
“Alpha Draconis’ summer term opening party.”
Right that. The party you had helped Jace plan. Before you broke up.
“I don’t know guys,” you sighed, leaning back against your headboard. “I don’t think it’s a good idea for me to go.”
“You don’t have to go,” Rhaena assured you but Baela shushed her, shaking her head.
“No, you absolutely have to go,” she insisted. “We’ve let you wallow in your misery long enough. It’s time to put your big girl pants on and face Jace. You broke up with him for a shitty reason and yes, he was being a jerk, but you were being a bitch. Now suck it up and get your man back.”
You gaped at her, and Rhaena whacked Baela in the arm, but she only shrugged, ever the unapologetic brutally honest one.
“What? You know I’m right,” Baela only said, frowning at her twin before she turned to you. “So?”
With a groan, you closed your eyes. You knew Baela was right, in a way, and it was no use sitting around when your friends were going out. You had to see him eventually.
“Fine,” you gave in, pushing the blanket back as Baela cheered, immediately disappearing. Rhaena only shook her head, stepping into your bedroom, helping you clean up a little.
“I’m driving,” she told you. “Just tell me if you want to leave, okay?”
You nodded, giving Rhaena a grin when something soft just hit you in the face with no warning, courtesy of Baela having returned to your bedroom.
“Put that on.”
The projectile fell to floor, and as you picked it up, you recognized it as a dark red dress, tags still on.
“Hel’s headed to the party from work, so we’ll meet her there in an hour, go take a shower and I’ll do your hair,” Baela said, reaching for your hand to pull you up. “Come on, up up up!”
Begrudgingly, you let Baela usher you into the shower, shutting the door behind you very decidedly. You stared at yourself in the mirror, eyes rimmed red and hair a mess and you allowed yourself a minute of respite before you turned the shower on. If you had to go to that stupid party, you’d make sure to look the absolute best.
“Am I crazy or is it even more crowded than last term?”
You winced as you followed Baela and Rhaena through an especially crowded spot in the house, glancing around.
“No, it’s definitely more people,” Baela agreed, squeezing your hand to make sure not to lose you in the mass. “Has Helaena said where she is?”
“She said she was in backyards,” Rhaena replied and Baela steered you in the direction of the backyard. Meanwhile you tried not to let your eyes roam too much; you didn’t want to seem like you were looking for Jace, even though that was exactly what you were doing. Just as you reached the patio doors, Helaena appeared, stopping you in the doorway.
“Hey guys,” she said, breathless, her eyes flitting over to you as you greeted her. “Should we go get drinks?”
“I’m not dragging my ass back through that crowd,” you moaned, shaking your head. “Let’s just sit down by the pool for a second before we go back in.”
You nudged Helaena out of the way gently, but the blonde grabbed your arm, trying to pull you back.
“But I’m really thirsty.”
“Hel, come on,” you laughed. “You’ll survive ten more minutes without-”
The rest of your words died on your tongue when you caught sight of Jace sitting by the pool, surrounded by his frat brothers and of course, Laura. Now you knew why Helaena was so adamant to get you away from the backyard. It was too loud to hear what Jace was saying, but he must be telling an extremely funny story with the way Laura was laughing, touching his shoulder. They weren’t doing anything scandalous, but it still hurt you to see him still talking to her after you voiced your concerns. You tried not to let it get to you. It wasn’t your business anymore anyways, but you were still a little sick to the stomach.
With a scoff, you turned away, embarrassment burning your cheeks as your friends looked at you with pitiful eyes.
“Sorry,” Rhaena said and you only shrugged with your shoulders.
“Whatever,” you muttered, clearing your throat. “I told you, she was into him. Now he’s free to do as he pleases.”
Baela winced. “We can leave, if you want.”
“No, I’m not leaving because of that clown.”
The girls let out a laugh and Helaena wrapped her arm around you. You gave her a wry smile, leaning into her.
“Let’s go get you that drink.”
As Helaena dragged you away, you couldn’t help but glance back to Jace and for a split second, your eyes met. You quickly turned away, feeling a lump form in your throat. You couldn’t wait to get drinks. After getting to the kitchen, the four of you did two rounds of shots, knowing where the boys kept their expensive booze; Rhaena then mixed you some drinks before you settled on the couch in the living room. Taking a careful sip of your cup, you immediately pulled a face, looking at Rhaena.
“What the hell is in this?”
“I think Grey Goose and Coke.”
“You think?” you asked, wincing when you took another sip. “This is awful Rhae.”
“What is awful?”
Aegon, Helaena’s brother, one cousin of many in the Targaryen family, suddenly plopped down on the couch next to you.
“Oh great, Aegon is here,” Baela deadpanned and Aegon only mocked Baela as he reached for your drink.
“Sure, just go ahead and take my drink.”
Aegon took a big gulp of your drink, humming. “It’s not bad,” he said, offering the cup back to you but you politely declined. You didn’t know where Aegon’s mouth had been in the last 24 hours, there was no way you’d drink out of the same cup he had.
“So, what’s this I hear about you and our cousin breaking up?” Aegon asked, throwing his arm around the back of the couch and you scooted forward, trying to escape his touch.
“You heard right,” you said, throwing him a dirty look and Rhaena rolled her eyes.
“You’re a dick, Aeg.”
“What?” Aegon exclaimed. “’t was just a question, no harm done, right?”
You let out a deep sigh, pushing away from the couch.
“I need some air,” you told the girls and Rhaena furrowed her brows, worried.
“Do you want me to come with you?”
“We can make Aegon leave,” Baela offered and Aegon made a noise, frowning at his cousin but you shook your head,
“Nah, I’m good. Just, text me if you guys go somewhere, okay?”
“Are you sure, babe?” Helaena asked and you nodded, patting her shoulder gently.
“Yeah, ‘m fine. I promise.”
With a small wave, you disappeared into the crowd, hearing the cousins starting to argue, but it was background noise to you. Instead of heading to the front door, you inconspicuously headed upstairs, past a kissing couple, and to the bathroom on the second floor. The door was shut, but unlocked and unoccupied as you opened the door. You let it fall shut in its hinges after you, walking over to the window, like you had done so many times before, but never alone. Clicking the window open, you carefully climbed out to the roof, sliding the window closed behind you again. You traipsed over the roof, before settling down on the small nook that sat right above Benjicot’s bedroom, stretching out your legs.
Jace had shown you this place when you first started dating, and sometimes when the parties got too much, the two of you snuck out here to be alone. It was probably risky to go here; but it was the only place you felt like you could retreat without having to go home.
The noise of the party downstairs could still be heard, especially the conversations in the backyard, but to you, it seemed quieter as you closed your eyes. It had cooled down significantly since you had come to the party, but you enjoyed the bite of the cold on your bare arms. A deep breath escaped your lips, your chest heavy.
Looking back on it, you knew what you had said was wrong. It was words hurled in the heat of the moment, chosen to provoke a reaction out of Jace and if you could take them back, you would. But now it was too late, it had seemed like Laura had already sunken her talons into Jace as soon as he was available - not that she had cared much about whether he had a girlfriend or not - and he seemed to be lapping it up.
“Stupid,” you muttered to yourself, wiping the tear that escaped your eye from your cheek with the back of your hand. You froze, when you heard the bathroom window slide open; not daring to look back. His steps were careful as he walked towards you, as if not to spook you, but before he came into view, a soft jacket was draped over your shoulders, engulfing you in his scent. You let out a breath you hadn’t realized you were holding, tugging the jacket tighter around your body when Jace sat down next to you.
The silence between you stretched on, before Jace cleared his throat.
“You were right.”
You let out a small scoff at his words, glancing over to him.
“You’re shitting me, right?” you asked in disbelief. “She was all over you like that and you still thought she wasn’t into you?”
Jace winced, ducking his head.
“That’s fair. Maybe I was a little oblivious. It’s just…” he paused, sighing. “I didn’t see it, because I don’t really see other girls. Ever since we met, it’s just been you. I didn’t even realize that she was flirting with me until she straight up asked me if we could go upstairs.”
Jealousy flared up in your chest at his words, and you frowned, quickly giving him a once over.
“Well, did you?” you asked, your voice tight. Jace gave you a look, his hands dropping down on his lap.
“I’m sitting here with you, aren’t I?”
Relief flooded your veins and you ducked your head to hide your face. Jace glanced over at you, his face vulnerable and you bit your lip.
“I’m sorry too,” you then said. “I didn’t mean what I said. It was petty and stupid, and I’m sorry.”
“Well looks like we both got to work on some things,” Jace said, tentatively reaching out to take your hand; out of reflex you immediately laced your hand with his. He quirked a smile at you, scooting closer to you and you glanced up at him, almost shyly before you leaned in, as he met you halfway, your lips touching. Jace wrapped his hand around the back of your neck as you kissed, and if you hadn’t felt warm before, you definitely did now.
“What’s happening?”
“They’re kissing!”
“No way! Move over!”
“You move over!”
A crash sounded and you pulled away from Jace, just to see Luke and his cousins spying on you from the bathroom.
“Nothing to see here, carry on!” Luke yelled, quickly sliding the window back down, but their bickering could be heard through the closed window.
Jace snorted out a laugh, leaning his forehead against yours and you only grinned lazily at him.
“Come on, let’s go face the circus before they break the window and we have to scale down the roof,” Jace said, offering you his hand as he got up. You let him help you up, as the two of you walked back to the bathroom window.
“You know I thought about scaling down the roof when you caught me in your bedroom?”
“You’re joking.”
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
author’s note: tell me what you think <3 also will add the taglist tomorrow bc i’m so tired but wanted to post🫶🏼
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violetisconfused · 23 hours
Text
Okay okay okay. Hear me out: Apollo x Telemachus.
I know I sound mental rn but it would be REALLY funny, and honestly kinda cute. Like you cannot deny that Telemachus would be Apollo’s type. I fear local pretty young prince is exactly the kinda person Apollo would be like “yeah I’d hit” and Tel would honestly probably go from “why is this god talking to me so often?” to “wait is he flirting with me?” to “wait but I don’t like men… but like Apollo’s kinda cute… wait no!” to “okay so maybe I like men but do I wanna get involved with a god?” pipeline of self discovery era all because the god of archery and music came down and started flirting one day
Athena is VERY unimpressed with her half brother for this one of course 😔 she is in fact their biggest hater (Ody is close in second he wants Apollo AWAY from his child)
Penelope and Hermes are very supportive of the relationship though. Penelope more in a “as long as you’re happy and he doesn’t hurt you or get you hurt I’m fine with it” way. Hermes though, he actively encouraged Apollo to start flirting with Telemachus to begin with (great grandpa being a wingman to get you set up with a god? More likely than you think)
As for the rest of the Olympians? Zeus is wondering why his existence is haunted by Odysseus and his family, same with Poseidon. Artemis is entirely unsurprised her twin brother has decided to start dating a mortal prince, it’s very on brand for him. Ares couldn’t care less, same with Hephaestus. Aphrodite is actually a big fan only because she can tell that Apollo genuinely likes Telemachus. Hera is indifferent about it but I like to imagine that after God Games she’s a slightly better step mom so she’s relatively supportive of Apollo’s prince rizzing endeavors.
The relationship itself is surprisingly highly functional and really normal despite Apollo being a god. For a long time Telemachus makes an internal vow to himself not to fall in love too much because he’s aware that Apollo tends to switch up on how much he loves his lovers sometimes and doesn’t wanna get hurt but after a very long discussion and Apollo swearing he’s serious about this (like Hyacinth levels of serious about this. Bro is LOCKED IN) and after staying up literally all night thinking about it Telemachus decides to seriously give this a chance and stop acting weird and it goes extremely well actually. They hang out daily, usually in like the woods or something or down by the shore where there isn’t anybody around simply because neither of them really wanna deal with other people knowing they’re together. It isn’t because either one is ashamed of the other or anything, just simply wanting privacy and knowing they wouldn’t get that with Telemachus being prince and Apollo being a literal god so people would probably just be staring the whole time.
Apollo also gives Telemachus gifts like crazy. He’ll write him love poems and songs all the time and is always equally as excited to show him every time (Telemachus is always just as excited to hear it because he’s never had anyone love him like this before)
Now the funniest part of this whole thing: the era where Apollo is trying to woo Telemachus. He 100% used serenading but stopped after Odysseus tried to shoot him with an arrow (to be fair it was the 10th time Apollo was outside the palace singing so the attempted shooting was pretty valid. Ody wanted his sleep)
Then Apollo started bugging Athena and tagging along with her whenever she’d visit the royal family (she knew what he was trying to do but there’s no stopping Apollo once he wants to woo somebody. Not for a lack of obvious hating though. Very actively hates on his flirting. Apollo is extremely un-subtle with his flirting too which makes it even funnier because 9/10 Telemachus just runs away because he’s never been flirted with before
Then after the flirting just turns into Telemachus avoiding Apollo at all costs (Telemachus is in his questioning his romantic attraction era during this but ofc Apollo doesn’t know this) Apollo just starts leaving love poems once a week (this goes on for about a month so four poems in total).
Then yk as I said before Telemachus decides to give it a shot blah blah blah gay people real they kiss the end 🥳
So yeah there’s me explaining my crackship. It’s essentially just: “Apollo likes pretty boys and Telemachus is a (very awkward) pretty boy”
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tideswept · 1 day
Note
Anakin really IS the prettiest of pretty boys. And when his obliviousness isn't enough to stop admirers from making a move on him, for sure, Obi-Wan is there to deal with them himself. Maybe he used to think it was funny, and would even use it to his advantage in negotiations, but when he starts getting requests from politicians and princes asking for some time with his pretty Padawan... bad enough he has to let Anakin meet with Palpatine!
Dearest nonnie;
I would like to slide over [1] piece of cheesecake with a handwritten love note as a napkin, I adore this so much. ♥
but fr fr how could this not have actually happened in canon? FETCH ME THE BOOKS. I bet Anakin was kind of all gangly and not much to look at and then something just snapped into place over the span of a single month and Obi-Wan didn't notice because it's still just Anakin, after all, why would he notice? He's too close to see the forest for the trees. Maybe if he'd had a little more time it wouldn't have caught him so off-guard, but the next time they're around other people, Anakin is getting stared at, and he can't figure out why, not until a waitress accidentally dumps hot tea all over the table because she can't keep her eyes off his padawan.
And now Obi-Wan is thinking shit, because he didn't really prepare for this, he's been operating on one-Anakin-related-catastrophe at a time, he didn't have an opportunity to consider the whole what if my padawan turns out to be ridiculously pretty? potential issue.
And who is he going to ask for guidance on how to deal with this? The Council? Stars, no.
Then it just keeps getting worse year by year, and he's so thankful that Anakin decided to follow him and use the same terrible hairstyle which at least cuts down on some of the leering, and he tries not to feel too bad about dangling Anakin like bait a few times, it's not like he'll actually let anyone put a finger (or tentacle or antenna or claw) on him. It's just another tool at the Negotiator's disposal.
He's got this under control. Absolutely not an issue.
(It's an issue.)
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Text
Starting a reblog game: RB w/ your own outsiders OC!
if enough folks do, I’ll draw them together or something lol, it’ll be fun!
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So these are blatant self inserts for my sister and me
(Info & backstories under the cut because I’ve put waaaay too much thought into this)
and again, pls do reblog/tag me w/ your own Outsiders original/self insert characters! (Drawings and/or written descriptions!) Making OCs was one of my favorite things to do as a kid, so I figured it’d be fun to bring it back here lol
(And to reiterate- if enough of ya’ll do this I’ll draw ‘em all together like a greaser-sona gang! So don’t be shy ok??)
-got sent to Tulsa from Seattle in 1961 at ages 13 and 11 to live with their mildly neglectful uncle, due to their mother getting cancer and being unable to properly care for them. Their father was lost at sea when they were little, so they had no one else to go to.
-in Tulsa they go by their mother’s surname, Biondi, instead of their father’s, because interracial marriage isn’t legalized in Oklahoma until ‘67. They try to pass as just Italian. This works better for Naomi, who takes more after their mother than their father in looks.
-Naomi is good friends w/ Ponyboy- she relates to him a lot, from the dislike of fighting to the love for sunsets (legit Ponyboy reminds me of my sister so much irl) (She’s also low-key got a crush on him and Sodapop which is pretty funny)
-Jesse is closer to Two-Bit, Dally, Steve, and Soda. And he really likes fights. They’re exciting and make him feel tough. When he stops to think about it it does make him a little uneasy how much he’s grown to like them, but usually he just ignores that
-Naomi disapproves of crime. Jesse used to oppose it too, but the more time he spends without good role models and parental figures, the more his morels loosen. Tries hard to be a good example for Naomi though
-Jesse met the gang through Sodapop originally- they were thirteen and some Socs were jumping Soda, and Jesse jumped in and helped him out. Soda explained to him what the deal with Socs and greasers is, because there’s no greasers up North
-Naomi met the gang separately through being classmates with Ponyboy. They were working together on a school project, one with him writing and her drawing
-So Jess and Naomi spent a solid few months hanging out with different members of the same gang, completely unaware they had the same group. They eventually end up running into each other at the Curtis house, and both are totally shocked. Two-Bit, who knew the whole time, nearly died laughing
-Naomi is friends with both Socs and greasers, because she isn’t really either- she’s financially a greaser, but she has a crazy high GPA for someone who has ADHD and dyslexia in the 60s, and besides that, she just doesn’t like what she sees as pointless rivalry
-Jess loves pointless rivalry. At least until people start getting hurt. Then he starts to get angry.
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Buzi fic let's muthafuckin gooooooooooo
B belongs to @ilovejoll !
[REDACTED] belongs to me!
[GOOD TEAM]
Back to that fuckin' camp... Great.
It's dark, it's rank, it's got a rancid, sinister and genuinely discomforting and dark aura, it's the place where one of her traumatic moments have transpired.
Uzi killed and ate her classmates here.
All this for a sighting...
And yet the four walked, around and about, searching like born hunters...
...
That's funny.
Uzi, N, V, and B (don't say anything about the names), they all walked and searched every nook and cranny, whatever cabin they found it's searched, because of this one Solver drone a group encountered that was, and Uzi quotes during the walk to the camp, "abnormally friggin' tall and chuckled a lot"
One guy even reportedly went missing after this encounter.
This new threat must be destroyed, there shall not be a season 2 of this bullshit.
Thud.
"I don't think it's here, weirdo" B spoke. Weirdo. Fuck's sake.
"It's Uzi, strawberry, and i'm sure if we look harder we'll find it, we already got traces of the guy so they must be here!" Uzi was confident after said traces were found... And N didn't seem to know when to quit being optimistic and supportive of Uzi, seriously the moment they got together it's like the entire planet was doomed to deal with these two dorks!
One of those dorks is your brother. You care about him. Do it for him. B sighed at the thought.
"We'll go a little further, and if we find it we kill it and we all go home, but if we don't..." B sounded threatening there, especially getting closer and whispering the next words in her sound receptor.
"You're dead to me. Having wasted our time."
Hot. That's not me saying it, i only say her thoughts out loud
"We'll find the weird analog horror freak, babe! I hate it when she's right, believe me, but we did find traces of this weirdo being around and we still find more!" V popped up from outta nowhere the interrupt the moment of intimacy intense mutual hatred, and showed off a piece of paper in her hand "Like this note i caught in a cabin!"
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V flipped the note around, showing off... Something???
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Uzi and N felt shivers run down their spine as V showed off the note.
"Haha! That's not ominous at all nope!" N and Uzi said in unison, perfectly. They took note of this.
"Jinx!"
V gagged at the sight of the Nuzi duo chuckling and giggling like little kids. B just glared at Uzi like she was a bad influence...
If it's of any consolation, they bother me too
"You don't get to talk, little shit" V growled at Uzi's tail.
Suddenly they stumble upon a strange... Cave??? In the camp?? At this time of year, at this time of day, in this part of the planet, localized entirely within this camp??
I had some fun while i could, it seems. Smiley face
"Shut" Uzi then squinted, as if it's going to make comprehending easier, and...
[PROCESSING WUTEVR THIS IS]
[◻️◻️◻️◻️◻️_______]
Yes it's a cave! A very ominous, red, fleshy cave that destroyed an entire cabin, turning it into a gruesome wooden outer layer for itself and thus taking it's place!
"aaAAHAHAHAa OKAY UZI UHHH... DO WE ENTER OR DO WE BURN IT ALL DOWN" N chuckled with lots of fear in his voice.
"If we burn the cave it's going to burn the entire forest too, and as much as i'd love that it's very important and i know there's others who love this forest as much as i hate it" Uzi sounds so smart when she explains things, it made N's core flutter... Aside from beating a little too fast at the sight of the cave and the general aura of the camp.
FIND ME
FIGHT ME
HOW WELL DO YOU FARE
Uzi turned around fast.
Oh i know this one!
She grimaced at this, hearing a robotic male voice coming from... Pretty much nowhere and at the same time as if it's behind her, and looked at everyone else to verify that she's not crazy.
N, V, and B all look just as unsettled. She's not crazy then.
"We're going home, gang, fuck this and fuck everyone" B began walking away while holding up two middle fingers.
Something was wrapped around their leg.
Catch
It's Uzi's fucking tail.
"We don't know what this is, it could be something worse than... It, and if that's the case, then we have to put a stop to it... As much as i hate this, it has to be done"
B hates when Uzi is right... They groaned "FINE let's get this over with" as they walked back to the area and swapped their hands with claws...
Let's go down in the belly of the beast...
Haha, Uzi scolded you
"She didn't scold me, freak" B growled at Uzi's tail. Y'know- the moment this thing began to speak, they knew it meant something terrible was coming. (Whether i mean they as in the group or B alone is up to you lmao)
Gross.
It's all wet, squishy, bloody flesh from top to bottom.
Massive, disgusting, grotesque.
This cave is nothing but blood and gore.
As the group walked, something began to pulsate from the ground Uzi walked on...
"GAH ROBO CHRIST!!" It blew up and blood landed on her face and clothes.
V could only giggle. Of course she'd giggle.
"Bite me, what if this happened to you!"
"I'd lick it off, period. Likely tastier than you~"
Uzi just. Glared and made a face that spelled out Why Are You Like This™
Gross, gross, gross, fucking gross.
Giggle
"Quiet you!" Uzi hissed at her own tail. You look crazy rn lol
Gurgling from further away..?
Uh oh spaghetti-os
"What the..??" B knew it meant something was wrong but they couldn't quite put a finger on it...
Until a spot in the ground began to pulsate, as if something was trying to get out and make itself known.
"Holy- V WATCH OUT!" B yelled as she tackled V out of the radius.
A tendril bursts from the ground, the spot that was pulsating before, and attempts to grab whatever was unfortunate enough to end up in it's clutches.
That being B.
"N GET OUTTA THERE!!" And Uzi, as she tackled the frozen in fear N out of it's reach.
B and Uzi are grabbed by tendrils, and right after dragged into the depths of the flesh cave, screaming.
"UZI!!!" N screams, fear in his voice and his heart beating at it's fastest, meanwhile V is quiet, in shock from what she just witnessed...
They've both lost people they care about...
"Ow... Robo god my head..." Uzi said under her breath, slowly getting up from a rough fall...
"Uzi..? Are you okay..?" She heard a familiar voice speak to her, a worried tone in their voice... B???
"No way you're telling me that, strawberry... Yeah i'm fine, i've been through much worse..." Uzi got up and dusted herself off.
B sighed "Let's get this over with before any of us die here, no bonding things, capiche?"
"Alright alright, no need to get pissy over caring about me~" she said smugly before–
"I care because N cares, if he didn't you'd be dead meat the moment we met. He's my brother and a fucking ray of sunshine, so you better behave."
Woah
"..." Uzi didn't know what to feel or think of this... It hit way too hard to really know what to feel... Maybe something like sadness? Something similar...
But she's not a feelings person, she's an edgy tough fighter that became GOD some time ago! She's not gonna let that persona fall apart now!
"Gee alright..." was all she could muster, seeing no other choice of words to respond... Whatever that was.
B swapped their left hand with a flashlight, looking for some sort of exit or way forward...
And a way forward there is. In the shape of a drone.
A freakishly tall drone with a blank, empty visor, also a tattered, dark blue robe and grey spiky hair. It's him.
A song began, somewhere. A very corrupted, broken song, making the sight of him standing all the more sinister.
Excited. Here we go~. Smiley face
You found me!
I'm so glad!
And now
He crouched, going from standing tall to crawling on all fours.
We get to play!
Yay!
Every spoken word, he moved like his body was made of a rubber hose, at times even twitching and shaking.
My name is Pen, and you are Serial Designation B and Uzi Doorman
How does he know all that?!
"Wha- wha- wh- what are you?!" Uzi stammered from the sheer terror, whipping out her railgun as B showed off their right hand, the huge steel claws, and the red nanite acid tail, preparing themself to strike the moment Pen made any move... And subconciously using the other hand to put it in front of Uzi, protecting her.
What am i? Ahhh... Good question there, miss Doorman!
I'm a host of the Absolute Solver, it seems...
His head twitched and shook for a short moment...
And i sense quite a lot of it, too, coming from
He crawled closer, his body clicking like clockwork, somehow not getting sliced and diced by B... Turns out, they're frozen in fear too, shaking.
You
Miss Doorman
His blank, empty, dark visor stared into Uzi's core...
But enough chit chat!
He quickly shifted and thrashed about back away from the two.
Let's get started with the games!
Let's have some fun!
Let's play together!
Just us three!
It's going to be so much fun!
As Pen lifted a hand...
"NO!"
SLASH...
Ah
My hand
B cut it off
Turns out, B did indeed swing forward and cut off one of Pen's hands.
That's something!
Why the fuck does he act like it's nothing
B lunged forward, and got smacked away by the remaining hand of Pen, and said hand is blasted into oblivion by Uzi's railgun. Well. More like whole arm.
"Shit i missed!" She hissed, as she did indeed miss! You missed! How could you miss, he was three feet in front of you!
Rude
Uzi is grabbed by the previously chopped off hand and thrown away from himself like a kid's toy, sending her railgun away from it's owner.
Where did that hand come from?? Can he regenerate?!
No matter, it's a fight he's looking for then it's a fight he'll get...
B and Uzi stand back up to have a go again and let out a war cry as they run straight towards Pen.
LET'S PLAY, FREAK
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It's a battle against just another liar.
When Pen is engaged in combat, all he does is scramble, thrash about, climb and crawl around like a spider and lunge forward when they're both lined up, causing both B and Uzi to get tackled and taken down.
When he is down, suddenly the room goes dark and both B and Uzi are grabbed and thrown away like plushies. And yet they keep getting back up to try again.
He likes to fuck with his prey, it seems...
At least it means Pen can be defeated.
Uzi, having landed conviniently perfectly from a throw, aimed her railgun at Pen once more, this time for the core. Which was hard to do, as his entire body moved like he was one rubber hose, thrashing about wildly and bending and shifting and whipping.
"Fuck!" Uzi shouted, which caused Pen to hear her cuss and grab her from afar as he threw B away.
Language, miss Doorman
I don't appreciate that kind of tone
I think i should punish you for that
And i know just what to do
Uh oh spaghetti-os.
"DO NOT TOUCH HER!"
SLASH...
B flew into the scene and chopped off the arm Uzi was trapped in, and suddenly it felt like time slowed down.
Oh holy shit.
The sight of B, in the air having chopped off one of Pen's arms, the one that held Uzi in his grasp, their hair flying in the wind of the momentum. That long, silver, fluffy, absolutely gorgeous hair.
...
B looked at her, apparently taking advantage of time having slowed down, and smiled so sincerely..? Why???
"[I gotcha]" their screen displayed.
She nodded and smiled back, as she fell and landed on her feet, and raised her railgun once more.
"B! Restrain him for me!"
"Copy that." Woah they love dropping that deep voice card don't they.
B, SOME-FUCKING-HOW, swapped their right hand for the laser and cut Pen's limbs off with it in the air in a half-moon swipe, and soon after they manage to pin him to the wall with their tail to his head.
Oh
Well
We had a good run
Well played, duo
See you another day
Bt Ofm kpplfc pm bs sgf kjsskf ovqokf hjqk, bjnjmh gfq spz bs gjt dpqf, gf efks, epq pmdf jm gjt kjef, xgpkf.
Boom
"Thanks for saving my ass back there..."
"It's nothing... Really, it's nothing, it means nothing-"
"Oh my robo GOD B COULD YOU STOP WITH THE TSUNDERE SHIT" B got startled at the sudden yelling from Uzi. They feel scolded now.
"You saved me and i saved you, we saved each other, because we both care about N and apparently each other too- if it's of any consolation i didn't want this either but does it look like i have control over my feelings?! No! No i don't!"
B looked on as Uzi went on her crazy tangent about feelings and reppression and so on so forth, essentially scolding them, and at some point...
"Okay i get it, now quiet! Christ you can be so annoying sometimes..."
...
...
...
Sigh
"Thanks, i guess... We made a good team..."
...
Uzi could only smile at that. They're right, they do make a good team...
"Yeah..."
"UZI!!!!!!"
Here comes big brother
UH OH SPAGHETTI-OS.
One mighty tackle hug full of love from a worried and happy N took her down once and for all! The evil is defeated! (No it's not, i'm being goofy here lol)
And now it's B's turn in getting taken down, from the small yet strong and feisty V, running full speed at B to give a tackle hug too, causing them both to fall down. V then proceeded to kiss the everloving fUCK out of B because god damn she missed them.
"Woag............" Is all B could muster.
"Are you okay Zi?! Are you hurt?! Traumatized?! Did someone try to do bonding things with you that wasn't B?!"
"I'm okay N i'm fine, heheh-" Uzi chuckled and then fell into a giggle fit when N began nuzzling into her neck.
...
Uzi looked at B, who was smiling at her once more. Surprised, then another sincere smile too.
[You did great]
[So did u]
[Thanks]
[Same]
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22 notes · View notes
coffeeshades · 8 hours
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credits to the gif maker!
LOVE IS COMPLICATED - PART IX
summary: the trials and tribulations of falling in love or two idiots who can't get their shit together.
pairing: pedro pascal x actress/singer!reader.
word count: 2.9k
warnings: 18+ (minors dni). fluff. angst. cursing, age gap, mentions of alcohol and depression. feelings of hopelessness, anxiety. no use of y/n, if i missed something please let me know!
a/n: here it goes. happy reading <3
masterlist!
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January 26, 2023
Los Angeles, California
The ceiling isn’t even interesting, but it’s better than everything else right now. You’ve spent too many nights staring at the same spot above you, trying not to think, trying not to feel, but the thoughts always come creeping back. Anxiety’s a funny thing—how it picks and chooses moments to make your life its playground, especially when there’s nothing left to distract you.
You think about your depression diagnosis from a year ago. It feels like a dirty word, one that sticks to the inside of your throat whenever you try to talk about it.
Shame has a way of making you feel unworthy, like there’s a crack inside you that everyone can see. And Pedro…well, he was part of that too. Not because he’d judge you; no, you know he wouldn’t. That’s what makes it worse. He’d understand, and you know it. But it was that very understanding, that softness, that made you feel even less deserving of him. It was easier to push him away, tell yourself that he was better off without you, without your darkness looming overhead.
It was stupid. You knew it was stupid. But knowing didn’t make it any easier. For a long time, you felt like shit. The medication and therapy helped, though. You feel better now, mostly. At least enough to move through the days without the weight of the world pressing down on your chest.
On nights like this, when the city outside your window hums with life, you find yourself longing for him. Wanting him with a kind of ache that doesn’t make sense anymore. Not after a year of silence.
Okay, not complete silence.
There were the text messages, the likes, the little online interactions that served as placeholders for the real thing. But the last time you actually heard his voice was on your birthday. He called, and it was brief. Polite. He sounded tired, maybe distant. You’d called him on his birthday, too, but he didn’t pick up. A few hours later, a text: “Sorry! Really busy over here, even on my birthday. Thanks for the birthday wishes. See you soon.”
Except “See you soon” never came. It was nothing more than etiquette.
Sarah came over a few weeks later. You were sitting on your couch, mindlessly flipping through a book, when she dropped the news. “They broke up,” she’d said, leaning against the counter like it wasn’t a bomb that just exploded in your chest. “Pedro and Julia. Months ago.”
Why didn’t he tell me?
That conversation replayed in your head for days. Maybe he hadn’t told you because you weren’t that person for him anymore. The one he turned to when things went wrong. Life just went on without him in it. The strange became familiar, and here you were, on a Saturday night, staring at nothing.
You push off the sofa, grab your phone from the coffee table, and start scrolling through social media. It’s the only thing that takes the edge off, numbing the ache for a little while. But even that was a trap because almost every post you see is about him.
Pedro was everywhere, and you couldn’t escape him.
The world had caught on to how wonderful he was, and now they all wanted a piece of him. The headlines, the photos, the fan posts—everyone seemed to wonder what it would be like to love him, to touch him. The universe was taunting you with his presence, a constant reminder of what you’d had and what you’d lost. Every time you saw his face, you felt a pang of regret, sharp and unforgiving.
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February 4, 2023
New York, NY
The invitation had come a week earlier, but not from him. His sister, Lux, had sent the text. “It would be nice if you came,” she’d written, and your heart had swelled in your chest.
“I’ll try,” you’d replied, though you knew as soon as you sent it that you would go. The next thing you knew, you were on a plane to New York, staring out the window, wondering what you were doing. You hadn’t seen him in person in over a year, and you didn’t even know if he wanted to see you. What if time had passed you by? What if everything between you had faded into the background, nothing more than a memory?
The night of the show arrived, and you were a wreck. A bundle of nerves, second-guessing everything. You sat in the audience, people asking for pictures here and there, and you smiled, happily obliging. But when Pedro took the stage, your heart stopped. He was nervous during the monologue, you could tell, but he quickly settled into the rhythm.
His breathing evened out, and he was so…perfect. He talked about his family, about his mother, and you felt the lump in your throat rise when he got emotional. He was always funny in the sketches, but especially when he almost broke character to laugh. You couldn’t stop watching him.
And you hoped—no, you prayed—that maybe he’d see you through the crowd.
When the show ended, people started to disperse, and there he was, surrounded by his family, by friends, all buzzing with pride and excitement. You hung back, watching as Lux tried to get everyone lined up for a photo. “Who’s gonna take it?” someone asked, and you stepped forward before you could think twice.
“I can do it,” you said, and Lux’s eyes widened in surprise.
“Oh my god, you came!” She rushed over, wrapping her arms around you, and you hugged her back, feeling a sudden warmth in your chest.
Nico and Pedro’s nephews followed, pulling you into their hugs as well. For a moment, it felt like old times, like maybe things hadn’t changed at all. But then Pedro turned, his gaze catching yours, and time stopped.
You stood there, staring at each other, and the world spun and stilled all at once. His eyes lit up, soft and warm, like they always had. He looked like he wanted to say something, but neither of you moved.
Five seconds. Maybe less. But it felt like forever.
You smiled, and so did he, a quiet acknowledgment passing between you. Lux handed you her phone, and you took the picture, watching them all gather together, laughing and chatting. You could feel Pedro’s eyes on you the whole time.
After the photo, he walked over, his eyes locking onto yours again.
“How…what are you…?”
“Your sister invited me,” you replied quickly.
“Of course she did,” he said, glancing back at Lux with a smile.
“Congratulations, you were incredible,” you said, the words tumbling out faster than you intended. “I’m so happy for you.”
He looked at you like you were the most precious thing in the world, like you were the moon and the stars. Your heart raced, and you could feel it thumping against your ribs. He smiled, a half-smile, and his voice softened. “Thank you. I think I butchered a couple of lines, but…"
“No, no,” you insisted, shaking your head. “You were perfect. It was perfect.”
He looked like he wanted to say more, his eyes doing that thing they always did when he was holding something back. But then he cleared his throat, looking flustered. “I have to go get changed and say goodbye to a few people, but come to the afterparty, okay? Oscar and Sarah will be there.”
As if you needed a reason other than him.
“Yeah, of course,” you said, trying to sound casual.
He took a step closer, his big brown eyes fixed on you. “Thank you for being here.”
You smiled, trying to keep your composure. “Always.”
And then he turned and disappeared backstage.
•••
Later, at the afterparty, you felt like a ghost, drifting between conversations. You caught up with Oscar and Sarah, the comfort of their hugs bringing unexpected tears to your eyes. It felt good, to be surrounded by people who loved you unconditionally. But you couldn’t help yourself; you kept looking for Pedro. From across the room, your eyes would meet, and the significance of everything unsaid hung between you.
Twenty minutes passed like that. Stolen glances, quiet tension. Until you saw him slip outside to the rooftop, away from the crowd.
Without thinking, you followed him.
He stood there, looking out over the city, his broad back to you, the skyline of New York glowing in the distance. For a moment, you thought about turning around, about going back inside. But then you stepped forward, standing beside him.
“This city,” you started, “is so beautiful from up here. Makes you forget about all the bad things—like the rats and the traffic.”
He laughed—that booming, wheezing kind of laugh you loved so much—and you smiled.
Pedro smiled at you—that same familiar smile that hadn’t changed in all these years. His eyebrows lifted playfully, and for a moment, it felt like no time had passed at all. But as you looked closer, you saw it—he had changed, and yet the essence of him remained.
His hair was longer now, curling just at the ends in a way that made you want to reach out and touch it. His beard, fuller than before, had streaks of gray decorating his jawline and his hair. The lines around his eyes had deepened, like stories waiting to be told, crinkling when he smiled, as if life had both weathered and softened him.
He turned to look at you. “Hi again.”
“Hi."
“You look good,” he said, the compliment slipping from his lips with ease.
You chuckled softly. “Thanks, so do you, Mr. Popular.”
He clicked his tongue, amused. “What can I say?”
The rooftop was hushed, only the chatter and music from the party drifting up from where you stood. The world below a distant hum, leaving just the two of you bathed in the soft glow of green and gold light from the city. The air was cool but not cold, wrapping around you both in a way that felt intimate, protective.
How Deep Is Your Love started playing, and you looked towards the party, a small smile playing on your lips. As if he could read your mind, he chuckled and said, "How fitting. What are the odds?"
For the first time in what felt like forever, you were under Pedro’s gaze—not the chaotic, feverish attention you were used to, with cameras flashing and crowds screaming your name, but something deeper. His attention had always been different. It was quiet, but focused, like a steady hand on your shoulder, grounding you without a word.
For a moment, you couldn’t speak, couldn’t breathe. The pull between you too strong, a tether stretched thin by years of disconnect but never broken. You felt it—the weight of all that had gone unsaid pressing against your chest. You had to say it. Now, before you lost the courage.
“I was debating whether or not to do this here,” you began, your voice low but steady, “today of all days, but I feel like the right time will never come for us, so I’ll just say it.”
Pedro’s eyes searched yours with anticipation, perhaps fear or hope, watching you with that unwavering focus that made your heart race.
In that moment, you realized, you didn't know where to start.
“I’m sorry,” you whispered, the words catching in your throat. “I disappeared like that, and I know I hurt you. I was... I was dealing with so much, and I wanted to tell you, but I couldn’t move. Some days were harder than others, and I felt so ashamed. So lost. So sad.”
The word sad hung between you, fragile yet heavy. You could see it in his face—how your words cut him deeply. His lips parted, and you saw the pain flicker in his eyes, the understanding that only he could offer.
“Baby,” he said, the word tender, rich with affection. He took a step closer, his presence overwhelming yet calming all at once. His hand moved to your hair, fingers brushing it aside before resting gently on the side of your head. The touch was so familiar, so comforting, you closed your eyes for a moment, letting the warmth of it wash over you.
“No,” Pedro said softly, his voice breaking just a little. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry for not doing more. For not being there when you needed me. I’m a fucking coward.”
You opened your eyes, meeting his gaze. “I pushed you away because I thought… I thought you were happy with her.” Your voice cracked, but you pushed through the pain. “And before that, I pushed you away because I thought you just didn't want me. I figured it was better to let you be.”
He let out a breath, stepping even closer, his forehead nearly touching yours. “I got with her because I couldn’t escape you,” he confessed, the words raw and full of regret. “You were always there, in my head, in my heart. I thought if I could be with someone else, maybe… maybe I’d forget you, but I couldn’t.”
You felt the tears sting at the back of your eyes. The truth of it, the weight of his words, felt like a key turning in a lock that had long been rusted shut. You wanted to say more, to tell him everything, but before you could, Pedro’s hand slipped to your cheek, his thumb brushing the corner of your mouth.
“I was afraid that you'd be the only person I ever actually wanted. And now I'm afraid that my one and only chance at happiness has passed me by.” He whispered, his voice low and intense. “And I…I think about kissing you more than I think about anything else, literally in the world. It’s my go-to thought when my mind has a minute to spare.”
You could barely breathe. The air between you felt charged, electrified by everything he was admitting, by the love you had both buried for so long. “I was so scared,” he continued, his eyes glistening. “So scared of fucking up our friendship, scared of what people might say, and scared of losing you because… I’ve never known what to do with pain, mi amor. All I’ve ever done is hide from it. But I don’t want to do that anymore.”
You reached up, covering his hand with yours.
He closed his eyes for a moment, as if your touch was too much, too overwhelming. Then, slowly, he opened them again, his gaze locking onto yours with such intensity it made your heart ache. “I was such an idiot,” he said, his voice rough with emotion. “I thought I could live without you, but the truth is, I’ve never been able to. Not for a single day.”
You smiled, your own tears finally spilling over. “Well, that makes two of us.”
"You're my favorite person to talk to," he said, "even when we're fighting."
There was a beat, a single breath in which the world seemed to pause, and then he kissed you. It wasn’t a tentative kiss, shy, or unsure—it was everything. Every moment, every longing look, every stolen glance over the years poured into this one, perfect moment. His lips were soft but demanding, his hands slipping into your hair as he pulled you closer. You knew people could be watching from afar, but you melted into him, because nothing else mattered right now.
When you finally pulled back, foreheads pressed together, both of you gasping for air like you'd been drowning and only just found the surface. His forehead rested against yours, his breath shaky, and in that moment, you saw it all—the vulnerability, the fear, the anger, and beneath it all, the raw, unrelenting love.
Pedro’s voice was thick with emotion as he spoke, “I hate myself for waiting this long.” His hands slid down to your shoulders, gripping them with a desperation that made your heart twist. “I watched you disappear, and I told myself it wasn’t my place. But it was. It always was.”
His eyes bore into yours, deep pools of brown that always saw you, even when you didn’t want to be seen. His hands turned and pushed you slowly to the railing, and you could feel the cold biting into your back even through the thick layers of your jacket.
“I hated myself too,” you admitted, the words spilling out in a rush, messy and imperfect, but true. “I thought about you every day. And I hated myself for it because I couldn’t let go. I tried, God. I tried with everything I had to move on, but it was always you. It was always you, Pedro.”
His lips trembled, and you saw the tears in his eyes—the same tears that were stinging yours. He let out a bitter laugh, shaking his head.
“We wasted so much time.”
You nodded, your own heart breaking at the realization. All the years you had spent avoiding each other, convincing yourselves it was for the best, when deep down, you knew the truth.
You had been running—both of you—from something that had always been there.
“I know,” you said softly, reaching up to cup his face, your thumb brushing against the scruff on his jaw. “But we’re here now. I'm here, and I'm not going anywhere."
He nodded, a slow, deliberate movement. “I love you,” he said, the words a soft confession.
You smiled, face wet with tears, your heart finally free of the burden it had carried for so long.
“I know."
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a/n: aaaahh finally!!! these idiots got it right it only took like 20 years lol.
an extra final chapter is coming very soon. i had so much fun writing this. i started writing this silly little fic right after a breakup because i was feeling lonely and it was the best way for me to not feel like that sooo i wanted to thank everyone who read, liked, reblogged or commented, it means the world to me that someone else enjoys something that takes so much of my time. love you all so much!!!
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lexithwrites · 14 hours
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some headcanons for the ladies of the fandom, and no this isn't gonna follow canon, they're all a little gay at the least, so cry about it x
dorlene,,my loves, i feel like they met at a gig honestly, marlene is very tomboy/grunge and loves going by herself to bars and pubs where some local band is playing and she's a bit awkward on her own but once she has a drink and sees a pretty girl she's a lot more chill and confident
then she meets dorcas and she's fucked, so so fucked
dorcas is my goth queen, long black dress, buckled harness across her chest, sharp black nails, dark makeup and so much jewellery and marlene cant stop staring at her
she didnt think she liked goth chicks that much but FUCK this woman is a goddess, and shes tall,,,marlene is a sucker for taller women
shes so nervous trying to chat her up because dorcas' voice is like velvet, its so soothing and melodic and marlene thinks she might orgasm just from talking to her, and dorcas TOUCHES when she talks to you she's touching her arm and running a hand down her back and telling marlene she looks hot and marlene is so red
but they do exchange numbers and talk for days before marlene finally has the guts to ask her out and dorcas takes her to this restaurant and honestly they spend the entire night together walking around and talking and they go to marlene's and do makeout but nothing further, dorcas is also my demi queen and marlene is probably shaking with nerves lmao
also i feel like when marlene introduces her to the group they're all starstruck by dorcas too, dorcas is like the hottest woman they've all seen and dont know how marlene's nerdy ass pulled her but are so proud and happy
plus dorcas is the sweetest most gentle woman, she's so caring and attentive and pays so much attention to what someones saying to her, she remembers everything
also her and lily? besties, they're both into the same shows and they're both book lovers and talk for ages about fanfiction hehe
speaking of, my girl lily, she's basically walked out of the 70's and i love her for it
all flares and tie dye shirts, long, bright red hair and crazy bright makeup, her favourite colour is yellow and she loves flowers and summer and UGH okay
she loves 70's rock too, i feel like she kinda hides it a little but her and sirius bond over it very quickly
her entire apartment is very boho and there's lots of incense and candles and yes, shes a stoner, shes cool
very bisexual but basically only wants to date women as her experience with men (past a fling with james when they were teenagers) has been bad so she goes on a lot of dates with women to try something new and they didnt really work out past a few dates but she's hopeful
then one night she's getting drunk and a lil high with mary and she realises how pretty mary is, how soft her skin is, how fluffy her hair looks and suddenly they're really close and woah her lips are so plump and taste like strawberry wtf
i feel like her and mary hooked up once and got so nervous that they ruined their friendship that they didnt talk for a week until remus begged them too because he hates his two closest friends not speaking
when they do talk mary tells lily that she's had the biggest crush on her for so long but she didnt know how to say anything because lily had dated other people in that time and lily just feels her heart sore because oh,,,oh
mary is the sweetest girl, okay, she's precious and honestly its because of trauma and just her resilience to it thats kept her so loving and sweet, she deserves a fiery girlfriend like lily
mary has a big family and i'll stand by that, she has like four brothers and three sisters and she's the third eldest so she's taken care of them a lot too
she loves taking lily to her families home and introducing them to her girlfriend and honestly? they adore lily
she's cool and feisty and funny and she clearly makes mary very happy, but her older sisters do have a protective talk with her but they love her, they know she wouldn't hurt her
i feel like mary is a theatre girl too, she loves acting and directing and learning about sound and costume design, she's defo in the universty theatre department and lily is always coming in with a coffee and some lunch incase she forgets to eat, plus it makes mary blush when lily comes in because everyone stares at her
also in the theatre department is none other than xenophilius, a shy, whimsy guy who is dating probably the scariest yet coolest woman ever, miss pandora rosier
her and her brother were always into acting growing up and loved being in plays together, so they're defo in the department too
i feel like pandora loves making costumes and does the makeup for shows she isn't in and evan is a big sound design guy, so they're always backstage together as well as onstage
pandora is whismy goth, her and dorcas bonded over that when they first met in freshers, and she always smells of flowers and cigarettes from her brother
she also wears the TALLEST shoes ever because she's short, i love short panda
and xeno is the tallest lankiest mother fucker okay he's like barty height and so skinny, and he has a shock of white hair and heterochromia eyes and fiddles with his fingers a lot and pandora thinks he's adorable
they talk about true crime together and she reads his palm a lot and he does her tarot reading and its a beautiful, soft, loving relationship
but i feel like they're also a lil freaky,,,maybe some knife play here and there who knows, pandora is a wild card
her and dorcas became friends with the other girls through marlene and after that they're all insperable
they go shopping, smoke weed, hang out in the rosier's pool during the summer, its great
and marlene is the only driver so she takes them to the beach and down to brighton for the weekend so they can go to the gay bars together, its just great
i love my ladies, i hope this meal was filling
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Note
I hope you don't mind me asking this, but why do you like Celegorm? I love that you're vocal about how stupid the Feanorian woobification in this fandom is because people who claim that they did nothing wrong or that they're not villains clearly hasn't read the Silm, but while there's still a level of sympathy to most of them, Celegorm is just genuinely the worst and I can't figure out what there is to appreciate about him lol. I'm sorry if this comes across as a bad-faith question, I really want to know how you like him while not ignoring, trying to deny, or worst trying to justify (which I have seen FAR too many people doing) his canon actions
you're totally good anon! i'd be happy to answer this. just want to preface, i perfectly get where you're coming from and why people hate celegorm, because he is, as you say, the worst. he's horrible. he's done awful things to countless people -- and by no means is he the only feanorian to have done that, obviously, but celegorm's actions in luthien's story make him a type of squicky that's unique even among the brothers. he, hm. how can i put this. he deserves nothing. and yes, people who try to justify him are just wrong. stop reading the silm if you want a mass murdering sexual predator to be glorified ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
that said! the succinct answer is that it's all about the vibes lol. all the feanorians are awful people, but celegorm is, imo, that particularly entertaining kind of awful. there's a certain interplay between his successes and failures that i find unbearably endearing (derogatory). he is canonically charming and magnetic and charismatic enough to sway people with his rhetoric, and i love that. i love that he's opportunistic, clever, and sly, and pounces on the chance when he spots it. the fact that his speech in nargothrond is explicitly paralleled with feanor's before the flight of the noldor says a lot. i find it compelling that while, in many ways, celegorm is the most distant from his family -- friend of a vala, a great woodsman and hunter which are two things that neither his father nor his brothers are ever even mentioned around -- he is the only one among the sons of feanor to be directly, textually compared to feanor, and feanor during one of his most pivotal and infamous moments, no less. the guy must be a force of nature when he really wants to be. yet at the same time, he's endlessly reckless, arrogant, and shortsighted, and he does not get to get away with his actions. his plans flop (just like he will continue to flop until his karmic and also really fucking funny death in about thirty years' time, i'll get back to that), his intentions are discerned, and he gets thrown out in disgrace for treachery with the embarrassing declaration "a maiden had dared that which the sons of feanor had not dared to do" following after him. it's that particular blend of hyper-competence followed hand-in-hand by prompt abject failure and humiliation that makes him so appealing to me.
oh and. another thing about celegorm is that he has the added charm of being a fucking sore loser and a petty bitch -- trying to kill luthien even though she spares his brother's life when she'd be justified throttling him and curufin with her bare hands and i just. he's sooo funny. what is wrong with him. so many things are wrong with him. tfw you kidnap and tried to rape this woman and she does you an untold, absolutely herculean grace and kindness that you know damn well you do not deserve and your reaction is to try to kill her for daring to show you compassion. he's insane.
then. then then then then. he gets chased by own dog and runs away "in terror." you know you've messed up when your dog finally has enough of your bullshit and runs you down because he's fed up with all the terrible things you've been doing. not to mention his dog also dies fighting next to a man that he hates, using his last opportunity of speech to say goodbye to said man. like. beren and luthien's story leaves celegorm, as skilled and magnetic as he canonically is, in absolute shambles and it's hilarious. how does one recover from that you may ask. and i answer one does not recover from that.
but that's not even all. after that saga of blunders he hangs around for about three decades doing absolutely nothing of note, then in his attempt to regain some relevancy winds up having the most mortifying death ever. my dude you were the "let's ambush doriath guys" spokesperson. you campaigned for that shit. this was your desire. this is what you wanted. and you walk in there and the guy who's *checks notes* THIRTY-SIX compared to your one-thousand-something KILLS YOU. elves are not developmentally matured until they're a hundred. your killer is like thirty. this is, generously speaking, about an eight year old by your standards. a fucking eight year old kills you. yes i know dior was not actually a child at the time but the fact remains that celegorm quite literally has more life experience than the entire human race and he's done in by the son of a human. then to add second insult to first insult to extreme injury, two of your brothers are also killed in this battle and in the end you all don't even achieve what the fuck you came there to do. THIS WAS YOUR PLAN. how do you lose that badly. holy hell. if i were him i'd stay in the halls of mandos forever out of pure embarrassment. you simply would never see me again. you think i'm walking out into society and showing my face around the block when an eight-year-old ended my life? nah. no sir not me
plus well. on a more serious note, dior is luthien's son. luthien, whom celegorm thought he could control, whom he saw as an object to further his aims and to lust after. he's killed by the son of the woman he tried to rape, and there's nothing more fitting than that.
so! there you have the basic rundown of why i like what's explicitly laid out about celegorm in canon. he's an objectively horrible man, it's just that i find the way he goes about being objectively horrible extremely funny. but i also think he is ripe for exploration in the realm of speculation -- and that speculation enhances what we do know about his actions during b&l and after until his death. aside from the kinslaying at alqualonde wherein all the sons of feanor participate, we see him and curufin acting unambiguously villainous a good bit before the rest of their brothers -- at the very least, they are clearly more willing to do horrible things at the point of time of b&l when compared to the likes of maedhros and maglor. like, they are out here committing actions that no sane person can rationalize as being anything other than abhorrent. it's clear that they've already given up on the idea of being "good"; they've already given up on keeping their hands clean and they've already shed whatever qualms they might have had in the past.
my thoughts on why? this is by no means canon, but tolkien does seem to like giving the legendarium's major villains some sort of arc and some type of insight into what they become (melkor gets history, sauron gets history, maedhros and maglor get history), so i don't see why celegorm should be any different. and for me, celegorm and curufin, especially celegorm, give the impression that they fell into despair and disillusionment far before the other feanorians did. and their response was to accept that they have no way of going back to the people they used to be, that they've already been rightfully damned, and if they've come this far they may as well do whatever they can to achieve what they fell so low for, because what does it matter anymore? it's part of why i think celegorm sees maedhros trying to look at beleriand and the war against morgoth from a larger perspective than just the silmarils, and both disdains and pities him for it. they've already been doomed and they already can't hope to make amends. they should do what they're here for -- and while, in celegorm's eyes, maedhros isn't willing to do what needs to be done, he is. i think that sort of mentality is fascinating. in a way, it's a self-fulfilling prophecy -- maybe if celegorm thought there was any meaning to him being better, or even just any meaning in not being nearly as awful as he resolved to be, then he wouldn't have stooped so low. but he did believe there was no hope for him, he did believe that he could never be forgiven -- and in believing that, he did go past the point of no return, beyond which he truly, legitimately couldn't hope to be forgiven. also, i just personally like the "well i'm a terrible person so i'm going to act like a terrible person"-type villains better than "oh no i'm a terrible person it makes me so sad and full of despair"-type villains (looking at you, maglor). again, none of this is canon, but it's my reading of celegorm's character, and i think it sheds some light on why he's so awful in b&l and afterwards. in his mind, it's already over for him anyway.
i hope this answered your question anon! i like celegorm, and i enjoy his character, because there are shades of a sad tale behind his descent to being the worst, he's entertaining while he's being the worst, and most crucially of all, he gets his comeuppance for being the worst in an extremely satisfying way. i definitely wouldn't like him (or the silm at all) so much if he'd been, like, successful in anything -- but thankfully he is written by an author who knows full well what an utterly reprehensible character he is. and boy does tolkien not spare him from that karma. he is simultaneously a singleminded and relentless fallen prince, a repulsive monster, and the story's laughingstock (one of them anyway). honestly, none of the feanorians tickle my brain quite like he does. i love him and i would beat him with a shoe
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tiov1 · 3 days
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“Rin died at Kakashi's hands because she WANTED to! It was all to save Konoha at the hands of the one she loved.”
It's funny how people only take chapter 629 as the “final explanation of Rin's death” into consideration and completely forget that chapter 675 exists. But what is the context between the two chapters? Well, in 629, we have the first “debate” between Obito and Kakashi inside the kamui dimension. And in this chapter, we have Obito's perspective/interpretation of what happened to Rin in chapter 605.
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However, in 675, we have Madara's revelations about her death, revelations that overturn Obito's words in 629. 629 is the same chapter where Obito says: “She preferred to die at the hands of the one she loved. All to protect the Leaf.”
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But what do we see in the 687? LMAO….
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In other words, chapter 629 gives Obito's interpretation/perspective of what happened (according to him) in chapter 605. But 675 shows Madara showing what really happened in 605, contradicting everything Obito thought in 629. Which means that 675 annuls 629, because Madara refutes everything that Obito thought, because he didn't know the whole truth, but rather BELIEVED that he “knew the whole truth”, when, in fact, he didn't know.
Before:
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After:
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In other words, Rin Nohara dying at the hands of Kakashi Hatake had already been pre-planned by Madara before it even happened. In other words, he already knew that she would die by his hand, because Madara had already planned for it to happen. In addition, Madara reveals that both Rin's and Obito's hearts were literally puppets of Madara through a seal that Madara himself had placed on both of their hearts to control them. In other words, Rin was literally Madara's puppet and so were the ninjas who kidnapped her.
Part 1:
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Part 2:
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Part 3:
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Obito had said in 629 that he “already knew everything”, but if you already know everything about something, then anything more would only reinforce what you had already said, right? So why was Obito Uchiha surprised when Madara mentioned that the seal that bound Obito to Madara was also in Rin's heart?
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A mere detail literally changed everything in Obito's understanding of her death. So when Obito says that he “already knew everything”, it was a lie.
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In addition, chapter 687 also refutes 629, because Obito said that “Rin died at the hands of Kakashi, because she loved him”, however, this is not what we see in 687 and 688, because in this chapter, we see that Rin Nohara, of her own free will, by HER FREE CHOICE, waited 20 long years to spend all eternity only with Obito Uchiha, without mentioning Kakashi at any time and without showing any interest in him at any time.
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Rin said twice that she was waiting for Obito.
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In other words, Madara and Rin refute everything Obito said in 629. But what I see is people using chapter 629 as the “definitive answer to Rin's death and the problem of the ninja world”, when Madara and Rin themselves REFUTED Obito's erroneous assumptions. It's unbelievable how illiterate people are in not connecting scenes to each other, but rather taking isolated and decontextualized scenes to jump to conclusions.
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Basically, Obito doesn't blame Kakashi for Rin's death, but the ninja system. But holy shit… if Obito blames the ninja system and Kakashi is a ninja, then Kakashi IS part of the ninja system, right? So directly or indirectly, Kakashi is just as guilty of Rin's death as Madara and all the other ninjas! If it was the ninja who created the circumstances of her death, then THE NINJA (Minato, Kakashi, Shisui, Itachi, Madara, Izuna, Obito, Hiruzen, Tobirama, Fugaku, etc.), in short, all the ninja, contributed to her death. Obito is guilty, Kakashi too, Madara too, Minato too, in short, if Obito blames the ninja system, then he blames the entire ninja infrastructure, in this case, ALL NINJAS.
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Some people feel sorry for Kakashi because “he lost the people he cared about”, but then I ask:
"Deliberately deciding to abandon someone to die because you didn't want to 'repeat what your father did' isn't exactly the attitude of someone who cares about YOU, but rather about their own status in the village, right?"
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In other words, Kakashi preferred to care about his own reputation as a ninja instead of valuing Rin's life (and he's been an asshole like that since the beginning of the story), something that Obito never did with her, Kakashi did. Obito didn't care about his reputation or whether he'd be seen as trash by choosing to save Rin instead of abandoning her like Kakashi. Obito chose to cherish her rather than abandon her. It's in moments of real crisis that we see who really cares about us and who doesn't.
Kakashi:
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Obito:
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Kakashi didn't care about Rin (until Obito asked him to). In other words, Obito had to ASK Kakashi to care about her, so that he would give her some importance.
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But even then their relationship didn't improve. In fact, their relationship deteriorated rather than evolved.
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So much so that Rin never tried anything with Kakashi again after he literally denied her personally. Kakashi literally represents a cold person from the beginning of the story, while Obito was his extreme opposite.
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When I call Kakashi an asshole, it's because he really is. So much so that he recognizes himself as such. I call him an asshole/garbage and he agrees.
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But even seeing that Obito was as guilty as Madara and Kakashi as guilty as any other ninja who corroborated the endless chaos in the ninja system that eventually resulted in his murder, Rin had a final choice. Who would she choose to spend eternity by her side?
Her childhood crush, the genius and prodigy, the boy she had freely chosen to leave to die and the boy she was murdered by, Kakashi Hatake?
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Or her best friend, the boy who never abandoned her and was always by her side from the beginning, and who, on the other hand, gave up on being Hokage, on hope and on the world, because for him, his hope was her, and she had died in front of him, and who in his last moments of life, decided to abandon all his beliefs to save the world and his greatest enemy/rival, Obito Uchiha?
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The result of this choice, you already know.
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Love is a choice. Loving takes a lot of sentimental strength. Love is something that needs to be reciprocated, otherwise it makes no sense. Love is for the few, and few people are capable of loving with such strength. Rin Nohara, who had a crush on Kakashi Hatake's abilities and genius, chose by her own choice to wait 20 years for eternity for Obito Uchiha, and not for Kakashi. Because her love for the Uchiha was so deep, so genuine and so true, that she couldn't move on without Obito Uchiha being with her, leaving Kakashi behind forever.
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I think Rin took this into account when she chose Obito to be her love for all eternity when she left Kakashi behind (just as he did with her). Kakashi left Rin behind before, then it was Rin who left him behind.
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In short, it's in the decisive moments that we really see who loves us and who doesn't. In Rin's case, she loved Obito so much that she couldn't move on without him, but she managed to move on without Kakashi.
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dustykneed · 6 months
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post-the search for spock but it's a yuri slice of life comic <333 nothing as good a bonding activity as lovingly combing out your vulcan wife's hair as you fondly bitch about your other wife 🩵💙💛
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mazojo · 1 year
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Anyways XO Kitty love interests summarized
Dae
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Min Ho
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Yuri
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haaate how my two favourite ships (surgamy + espilver) typically involve the less popular character losing their edge and acting really out of character (but in an in character way?) because when i go through periods of not drawing/writing/whatever much when it comes to surge or espio as standalone characters (or at least outside the context of shipping) i get scared im gonna forget who they are and that theyre actually so cool
#sonic#surgamy#espilver#surge the tenrec#espio the chameleon#tag rant warning#also: i only started truly liking espio after i got into espilver#(i mean i thought he was funny and had awkward swag in mosth but that was it)#wheras i was always a fan of surge and only started to like surgamy a few months afterwards#(i only started reading idw whenever 60 was the latest issue#so its not like im some surgamy og who started shipping them when we knew barely anything about surge)#anyway rant aside#i saw someone complain about surgamy filling the surge tag and while i took it a bit too personally (i didnt interact i just moved on)#at the same time i have to agree#its less of a problem with espilver seeing as espio has been an established character much longer than silver#even if silver's more popular#so it balances out#but surge is only a few years old and exclusive to idw a while amy is 25+. one of the mainstream sonic characters and is in most canons#not to mention despite the unneccessary discourse she is beloved by most#and id say most amy ships are about equally popular (other than sonamy but its probably less popular in recent years)#meanwhile surgamy is like THE surge ship#the only thing i think that comes close is whispurge and it doesnt really#ANYWAY#because of this surge is kind of in amys shadow and just. yeah. im too tired for this.#anyway surge is aroace realistically and i dont want her to reciprocate if amy gets a crush on her#(thats not true)#(if they ever got together i would probably either go into a state of euphoria or mania depending on how mentally stable i am at the time)
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redinthesea · 1 year
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I'm gonna be honest, I have zero explanation or excuses for this one. Self-indulgent crossover just for the sake of it. If you get it you get it. Posts with a target audience of one person (me).
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wonder-worker · 1 year
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Thomas Penn writes about 500 year old dead historical figures like they're celebrities in a gossip column
#it's funny to an extent but after a point it gets very grating#he has a wealth of information but he's far too sensationalistic and florid#and tends to choose the most unsympathetic and/or colorful interpretation of every situation and historical figure#he also has a habit of ... narrativizing history which doesn't really work for me#also his fatphobia re Edward IV was absolutely revolting#I was planning on ordering the Winter King but after looking at the synopsis and first 2 chapters that were available online - no thanks#I'm definitely not interested in reading about Henry VII supposedly being 'sinister' and 'Machiavellian' because he...ruled successfully?#because he did what kings (unfortunately) did all the time? How was he any different from the others?#also imagine calling *Henry VII* ruthless & unscrupulous when his predecessor murdered his own kid-nephews and his successor was Henry VIII#like please be serious#I had the same issue with the way he described Edward IV's reign. His descriptions were so theatrical and emphatic but#at the end of the day the things he was describing were very normal lol#or they would be normal if Penn didn't choose the most critical (and mocking tbh) perspective for every single thing#the way he described Henry VI's reign was also annoying but it thankfully had far less pagetime and was not the focus of his work#so it was comparatively more tolerable#i'm glad that he acknowledged the propaganda against Margaret tho. I didn't like how he described her but at the very least he acknowledged#that she was being slandered#also calling Warwick 'the regime's biggest headache' lmfao#and ig some of his analyses on Richard III were interesting. It helps that R3 had a very short and very dramatic reign from start to finish#so Penn's flourishing tone doesn't really feel out of place for it
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diari0deglierrori · 8 months
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I love that every time there’s a flashback of some characters as kids they always have the exact same haircut as when they’re older
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