#it’s going somewhere beautiful

[harringroveera]

I fear the Wheelerway fic is now out of my hands and is developing by itself

[soracities]

we NEED more cleaners and bricklayers and scaffolders and delivery drivers in MFA poetry programs. like. immediately.

[bixshits]

so rosencrantz and guildenstern are dead functions on the idea of these guys not having a choice right? and even if they choose to just sit down and not move anywhere they'll probably be moved to where they need to be regardless? and the only choices they have are how they choose to interpret their world, with rosencrantz needing to find and test the boundaries of it and cement their place in it and guildenstern trusting the narrative without question? and guildenstern refuses to allow either of them to decide who they are? and they are so interconnected with each other that they are simply inseparable and indistinguishable, even to themselves? and they cannot define themselves without the other and become lost when they lose each other? and their choice (or lack thereof) in identity (or lack thereof) is mutually decided (or determined) to be in their inherent love and trust and unity in and with each other? and you expect me to be normal about that?

[burnyourtrains]

Stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art Stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art Stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art Stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art Stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art Stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art Stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art Stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art Stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art Stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art Stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art Stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art Stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art stop stealing art

This means reposting without permission. Feeding into ai. Taking as your own. Not giving credit to the artist. Posting things that aren't yours in the first place. Etc.

This goes for fanart, original pieces from the artist, writing, gifsets - anything someone took the time to make.

Stop stealing art

[skibasyndrome]

"Are you mad at me?" and Honesty

inspired by the awesome parallel @impossibleknots found between these two shots

and these tags by @darktwistedgenderplural I'd like to talk about this

For both of them, this line comes after a breaking point, when they realize that they just can't stay away from each other for any longer.

Wilhelm, after rejecting Simon out of some misplaced sense of duty and swallowing down his grief about it, literally breaks down on the football field and, fuelled by alcohol and drugs, for once manages to let his guard down.

"You think you know me, eh? You don't!", he yells, followed by "That's right, I do whatever I want!". And then, well, he does what he wants and calls up Simon. And he's finally honest with him. Granted, it's very much the drugs that help him let his guard down, but - in an effort to be less fake than everything that surrounds him - he tells Simon that he likes him. That's one of Wilhelm's first and most authentic verbal declarations of what he feels. And from then on, at least for now and at least in front of Simon, the floodgates are open and he's baring his soul: "Thank you for coming", "You're so beautiful", all his little love declarations, and then he's letting him in on his insecurities as well. "Are you mad at me?" and, after once again declaring that he's so glad Simon is here, "I don't want you to be mad".

It's one of those things he hasn't been allowed to voice or even show, we know this. When he's nervously biting his thumb in s1e1 his mother slaps away his hand, lest he be seen behaving unprincely, and he's thoroughly internalized keeping up the facade, like when we hear him blatantly lie to Simon about being happy to be at Hillerska. Everything and everyone being fake, that includes him, Wilhelm. (And we know that his journey in deconstructing this fakeness is only starting out)

But at least for the time being, he's able to stand by his feelings for Simon. He does still need his assurance that "it's okay" once he's confronted about his love declaration, but he still does admit to it. And that honesty is what leads to them making love for the first time.

Letting their guard down, fully committing to what they're feeling for each other. Honesty is what leads to this.

The second time, it's Simon's turn to bare his soul. Yes, Simon has been the one that has helped Wilhelm be more honest and more vocal about his own feelings, but Simon himself, while forthcoming about his love and the fact that he wants to be with Wilhelm, is still struggling himself, especially when it comes to voicing his not so pleasant feelings, like how heartbroken he's feeling for all of s2.

Even during their 'exchange' in class, it's still only about him slowly starting to see Wilhelm's side, and not about the uncomfortable and conflicting things Simon himself is feeling on the inside.

So when he worriedly texts Wilhelm "Are you mad at me?", that's him admitting that, yes, he's also very much still invested in this, in them and that that's scary, unnerving and that he's not sure how to read the situation. He's letting his insecurity show, something he very, very rarely does. Beautifully, he does it again later, now face to face with Wilhelm. After Wilhelm says that he's scared, Simon admits it, too, letting down his walls for Wilhelm to see that he's not as tough as he pretends to be AND he lets Wilhelm be the one to comfort him, reach out his hand and take him ino his arms.

So in one instance, we have Wilhelm finally letting his true feelings show, proving to Simon - who's been open about his attraction - that the feeling is mutual. And in the other we have Simon, who up until now has been trying to keep his conflicting feelings under wraps and his fear hidden, reassured and coaxed into admitting to them by Wilhelm openly saying that he also is scared and physically showing that he's there for him. Mutual honesty.

Two very different admissions and two very different subjects that they now finally managed to be honest about and every single time it brings them closer and, in both scenes, it repairs the trust that was broken by dishonesty before.

And what makes it even more beautiful to me is that, in addition to it being in a way a new beginning every single time, we know that both instances did have a lasting impact on both of them and their journey towards being more honest with each other. Yes, there are ups and downs and Wilhelm did lie to the world about the video after their first time, but he keeps on learning and the second time around, he is much more honest about his love for Simon. And we even see it bleed into the last episode with Simon now finally admitting to just how much he feels for Wilhelm and Wilhelm in turn finally taking back his initial lie in front of the whole world.

Their journey towards full honesty is still very rocky, but with every instance of them letting down their guards together, they grow closer and their ability to be authentically themselves not only together but also towards the world vastly improves.

[obscurecurse]

Can we talk about Kiyoi when Hira doesn't go after him...

[^Literally checking over his shoulder for Hira.]

vs Kiyoi when Hira DOES go after him?

Love makes this man behave like a cornered animal

[swordheld]

hi! your blog is one of my favourites and i absolutely adore reading your thoughts. my grandfather recently passed away and it feels like i lost myself with him. how do i continue living after this? there is this constant weight on my chest and it feels like an emptiness has made a home inside of me. how do i go on when it feels like the world crashed on my shoulders?

hello, love! this is so very sweet and kind of you, and i hope you're treating yourself gently and kindly right now - there aren't words for a loss like this. that heaviness is difficult, and hard, and painful. it's okay if things don't feel okay, right now, or even soon - i think that's something that a lot of the people i know that have gone through similar grief feel: like they should be able to get back to a relative 'normal' in a [insert far too short period of time].

but it's okay if it hurts. that's where i'd like to start. you're allowed to feel that emptiness, that world-crashed feeling that goes beyond words, beyond time. don't feel like you have to rush this to feel some sort of better. things get easier with time, i promise you this, but sometimes painful feelings are important to feel, too. cry, scream, feel your emotions. they're a part of you. grieve.

it's perhaps a little silly, but when i think about death i always think about a couple of space songs: mainly drops of jupiter by train and saturn by sleeping at last. there are perhaps others that speak to the emotions better, but these two have always hit something a little deeper for me, and are popular for a wide-reaching reason.

and while personally i don't know much about grief like this, i do know a lot about love; and i think they're a lot of the same thing.

the people we love are a part of us, and this is why it takes from us so deeply when we lose them, because it does feel like we've lost a part of ourselves in the wake of it. but it's because they were so central to our experiences of living - our lives, that the separation introduces a hollowness - a place where they used to be. a home that now goes unlived in.

an emptiness, like you said.

but just because they're not here physically, doesn't mean he's not still there, in your heart, in your life, your memory. you can hold him close in smaller ways, as well: steal a sweater, or cologne/scent for something a little more physical and long lasting for remembering. hold onto the memories you cherish, the things that made you laugh, the ease of slow mornings and gentle nights. write them all down, slide a few photographs in there, go through it and add more when you miss him. keep them all close, keep them in your heart.

you're not alone, in this. he's still there, with you, it's just - in the little things.

he's with you in the way you see and go about your daily life, in doing what he liked to do, in the ways he interacted with the world that you shared with him. the memories you recall fondly when the night is late or the moment is right and something calls it into you like a melody, an old bell, laughter you'd recognize anywhere.

but i think, perhaps most importantly above all others - talk about him. with your family, your friends, his friends, strangers; stories are how we keep the people we love alive. the connections they've made, the legacies and experiences they've left behind, and so, so many stories.

how lucky, we are - to love so much it takes a piece of us when they go. grief is the other side of the coin, but it does not mean our love goes away. it lives in you. it lives in everyone who knew him, in the smallest pieces of our lives.

the people we love never really leave us, like this: they're in how we cook and the way we fold our newspapers, our laundry, in the radio stations we tune in to and the way we decorate our walls, our photo albums. they're in the way we store our mail, organize our closets, the scribbled notes in the indexes of our books. the meals we love and the drinks we mix, the way we spend time with one another. they've been passed down for generations, for longer than history - and we are all the luckier for it.

think about what you shared with him, and do it intentionally. bring him into your life, like this, again. whether it's crosswords or poetry or sports or anything else. if one doesn't help, try another. something might click.

i hope things feel a little easier for you, as they tend to do only with time. i hope you find joy in your grief, even if it is small and hard to grasp at first. know that your hurt stems from so much love that there isn't a place to put it properly, and that it is something so meaningful and hurting poets and storytellers have been struggling to put it into words and sounds that feel like the fit right for eons, and that it is also just simply yours. sometimes things don't have to make sense. sometimes they just are - unable to be put into words or neat little sentiments, as unfair and tragic as they come.

but i promise it will not feel like this forever. your love is real. and perhaps, on where to begin on from here - i think it's less on finding where to begin and just beginning. and you've already started. you've taken the most important and crucial step: the first one. wherever you go, after that, from here? you'll figure it out. you always have, and you always do. it'll come, as things always do. love leads us, as does light - and you're never alone in your hurt. in your grief, your missing something dear to you. i think if you talk about it with others, you'll find they have ways of helping you cope as well - and they have so much love of their own to spare, too.

as an aside, here is the song (northern star by dom fera) i was listening to when i wrote this, for no other reason more than it makes me think of connections, and love, and how we hold onto the people we love and how they change us, wonderfully and intrinsically. it's a little more joyous than the others i've mentioned, and plays like a story, and it made me think of what is at the core of this, love and stories and i am here with you, and maybe it'll bring you some joy, if you'd like it. wishing you all my love and ease 💛

[lordartsy]

2/10 - Naga's birthday coincides with me watching the finale of this show. I miss him already 🐍

[froody]

I’m actually sponsored by the North Carolina tourism board and that’s why I romanticize it so hard.

[sysig]

@vernors tags are so incredibly correct (Patreon)

[angelmush]

i got a goose tattooed on the inside of my forearm today and it was a flash piece but it's my favorite tattoo already it means everything to me i could sob

[michimiart-blog]

Hello, let me drop a Miss Furio around here

A dress for no reason in particular, except that I wanted to draw her in a clothing different than her usual turtleneck sweatshirt and beige pants.

Side note: The dress was a gift from Yakou.

[adellovesrowan]

can you even imagine falling like i did?

[starzknight]

Disney princess with a bit more accurate outfits...

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[chr0n1c-ag0ny]

Fyodor/Nikolai/Sigma, domestic au, but they are painfully slavic and living their best lives, is something that can be so personal.

(this post took forever cause I essentially had to make it twice. I didn't look at what blog I originally posted this to the first time round. shoot me)

[remyfire]

Have you ever wished you had just a little extra assistance to perform your devious act of mischief? Afterward, do you feel immediate regret and need help figuring out why the fuck you're the way that you are? Good news!! Saint Beej and Saint Sidney are here to help!

This is possibly the silliest gift I've ever received and I can't stop giggling about it. Huge shout out to @allcanonisrelative for bringing some much needed levity into my day!