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phoeebsbuffay · 7 months

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Imagine “Star Wars: “special editions” songs V.

• When We Were Young

Imagine you are friends with Anakin Skywalker since childhood. However, once you two are now grown ups following different paths, a new sentiment arises. Part II

Warnings 1: *long post*; drama; angst, unburnt Vader; explicit smut.

Warnings 2: alternative universe; no younglings are killed here.

Warnings 3: based on Adele’s two albums “21” & “25”

No minors.

***

• Before the storm…

As much as Anakin tries not to get you involved in his internal riot, his efforts have no avail. You may not be sensitive to the Force, but you do know him like the palm of your hand.

So here you two are, beneath the moonlight—in a rare, calm instant where you two could have a moment for yourselves.

“How’s it been serving Senator Amidala?”, Anakin eventually asks. He’s been told of the attack that nearly got yourselves killed—another factor that fuels his frustration; had he been truthfully powerful, he might’ve been able to prevent such things to happen.

“It’s been quiet lately”, you tell him with a smile on your lips, diverting his thoughts from his self agony. “For once, it’s been lightly boring…”

He chuckles, eyeing you with devotion. Anakin knows you just as deeply as you know him. As he holds you possessively against him, he is tempted to dive in your thoughts—but he wants to focus in you, in what you have to say, even if this means he’ll get worried over you constantly…

“Boring?! Getting me concerned is not boring, my lady!”

You giggle at his protest, finding adorable how protective he is towards you. Leaning your forehead against his chest, your raise your eyes, meeting his.

“We are not entirely different from each other, uh? Should I remind you of all those years when you were mute, never writing one single letter to let me know how you were?”

Anakin sighs dramatically.

“Well, you have a point”, he admits rather unwillingly.

There is an exchange of glances, where he contemplates your soft features, a smile slowly spreading over his lips when realizing you are blushing because of his intent stare. He then leans to peck your lips, resting a hand around your waist all the whilst he holds your neck gently.

"I love you", you sigh in content as he kisses you.

"I love you too, Y/Nickname."

As you part the kiss, he cups your face and says:

"I will never let go of you. This I promise."

"I pray you keep it", you whisper, sounding more eager than you expect.

As the twilight starts to paint a soft shade of orange, Anakin and you exchange promises underneath the rising stars. No words, however, dare to break the spell when the kiss starts to deepen, letting open the pave for a spark of something new.

Words seem to dissipate into forgetfulness as his tongue slowly pursuit yours. As you slowly turn towards him, his hands are now pulling you much closer to him.

You let yourself be involved although you are unsure how to proceed. Anakin doesn't know either, but there is a natural instinct that makes him kiss you fervently all the whilst his fingers dig into your waist, moving impatiently below. You realize what he wants to do--and to realize this is what you want too makes you soaked.

"Naughty, naughty", he whispers in between chuckles when he parts the kiss to let his tongue slide to your neck.

"Don't you dare to read my thoughts, Skywalker", you snort at him, eyes lightly closed as you blush in response to how he devours your flesh. You hate to be inexperienced, wishing there is something you could do.

As if sensing your mute frustration, he pulls your hand right over his rigid pants. Anakin smirks, growing bolder with his hands too, ignited by a desire of feeling you for the first time.

“Ani”, your choked voice gives out more than you’d admit out loud.

“Let me show you something, princess”, he whispers into your ear.

His fingers carefully slip from your hips to your thighs all the whilst his eyes are locked with yours. You lean to kiss his lips, your delicate hands doing the same to him. But you lose track of your thoughts once his index finger finds its way to your feminine core.

“Oh!”, you exclaim, perplexed by the sudden fire that seems to burn your body like a fever.

“Shh”, he smiles at you; feigning confidence, he finds way to please his lady. “Do not be so loud, darling.”

As he starts to stimulate you, he’s careful to read you. Anakin smirks at himself when seeing your mind going blank, you rolling your eyes upon this new discovery. It does arouse him to know he’s your first.

“Ani, you…”, you gasp, moving lightly your hips against his hand. “You… Oh Maker!”

It does not really help your case that his lips are now going to your neck, bitting it softly before making ways to your collarbone. You throw your head back, but your hands are now buried into his curly hair in order to prevent your fall.

“Is it good, my dearest? Tell me if it is”, he whispers against your skin, taking delight at how easily you squirm at the slightest movement.

“You make me… Ani!”, you are about to cry out, feeling a sudden heaviness upon your legs. “Ani… I…”

He would gladly bury himself in between your breasts, but the desperation in your voice calls him. The Jedi gently lies you down, watching your face as you come undone. And before you get too loud, he shushes you with a kiss.

But just when you are about to make it your turn, a sudden noise breaks the spell. Sensing a strange movement, Anakin impatiently sighs.

“We better go”, he grumbles, whilst helping you straighten yourself. “There is somebody looking for me, I can tell.”

You pout at him, still unreasonable to conceive that, in reality, you two should not be seen.

“W-What? Why?”

You are smirking, it’s as if you are drunk—a sensation you’ve never tried, though, because you were never attracted to alcohol, seeing the sad side effects it gives people.

However, Anakin feels as if he’s tasted fire, he’s now experiencing the cold, for he is tensed—he senses the presence of another Jedi and it’s possibly the one who he came to despise: Master Windu.

What’s he doing in Naboo?

“We better go”, he tells you, somewhat distant.

“Ani”, your smile now falters and your heart skips a beat. “What… Why? What happened?”

Just like that everything has changed. Unbeknownst to you, an eclipse is forging…

“We must go”, says he firmly, trying not to focus on the possibility he might get hurt you in the process. He did not have the time to tell you about the whole Jedi process. “Now.”

You do cast him a hurtful look, but understand that there is little to be done. You are aware that what you two were doing was secretly and suddenly you come to despise the Jedi Order for taking him away from him.

Anakin senses the eruption your heart is about to suffer, but he has no time to ease it.

There is so much to be said, but little time to do so.

“I’ll explain to you soon”, Anakin assures you as he leads you to your quarters.

You hold his wrist, impending for a moment his depart.

“Come back to me, Anakin. Don’t leave me alone in this world”, you tell him, urged by a bad feeling that came uninvited. “Whatever is going on, come to me. I’ll help you somehow. Don’t hide from the light.”

The shadow casted on his features softens. He gives you a crooked smile.

“You are my light, Y/N. I’ll come back to you. I’ll always find you”, he smiles, even though his smile doesn’t reach his eyes.

It seems to you that he wishes to tell you something. Anakin hesitates, but it’s only for a moment before this moment is gone. He presses a kiss on your forehead. Aware that you are going to burst into tears, he turns his back on you.

For your own sake, Y/N.

But this is the last time you see each other before it happens…

***

Two weeks ago.

Once a lady in waiting who got used to nobility, who enjoyed dancing, who smiled the brightest of the smiles, the one every poet praised the beauty… Now you are a phantom, a memory of what liberty meant.

You are a fugitive. You don’t belong to the Empire, but you don’t know how to fit in the Rebellion either. You have become a survivor.

Memories ache, indeed. You understand Anakin died with the Order 66. Padmé herself told you. She tried to encourage you to join the Resistance, but you’ve come to realize the Jedi were too vain to see what Anakin was going through—and thus let your beloved die.

“They took him away from me!”, you told her, eyes puddling with tears.

“It was the Empire, my dear”, Padmé insisted. “It is that evil thing we ought to aim the destruction.”

But even then… Every hope died when Padmé was killed. It was too much for you to take. Now here you are. A nobody, a vessel of the past, haunted by a broken heart.

I should have fought for you, Ani.

You do not know but by choosing to hide in the shadows, these are to lead you to someone whom you’ve long accepted to be gone.

Lord Vader has not forgotten you. But he waited patiently to acquire enough power to take you back. He is no longer the weak Skywalker, prompted to sentimentalism and control. No, he is better than that.

With Palpatine now defeated, the power of the Empire lies with the last Sith Lord. Unwilling to share it with a pupil, he in fact knows only one can be his equal.

His yellow, flaring eyes search for you; aware of your silent steps, they eventually find you. His heart skips a beat when seeing your beauty has matured—remaining alluring as ever, time has not changed it all.

Despite your link with old Skywalker, Vader’s too attached to let go of you. There is a tentacle of remorse suffocating his mind for allowing himself to abandon you.

But he overcomes it. The need to have you comes to it. And he does not take any more time to come for you…Not when seeing how close you two are from each other.

***

The meeting.

You are in this strange planet whose name you know nothing of. After getting yourself friends with pirates, you are delivered there specially with your gold now gone—and out of respect for you, they spare your life.

Surrounded by fog, you can barely see anything. Hugging yourself, you are exhausted and tired from running after two years.

You still remember when seeing the death of the good queen Padmé, the moment where Clovis nearly sold you out back to Tatooine so he could save himself.

You cannot forgive his treason, although you did try to find excuse for his deeds. Maybe it was his way to cope with the loss of his wife. Whatever it was, you tried to reach out for Anakin. Desperately so.

He never answered. And you believed him to be dead and gone.

Like you were told by Clovis himself. As you still recall the reasons why all of a sudden you were treated with little lenience by the man who was like a brother to you, wondering what Anakin would do if he was in your shoes.

You snort to yourself at the thought. He would easily outwit anyone… A deed that I could never do.

A metallic breath comes so suddenly, cutting short your thoughts. You shiver, fearful.

“W-Who is there?”

No response. You try to remain calm, appealing to reason that this planet, as your former "friends" told you, is neutral, somewhat forgotten by both rebels and the Emperor.

However, why does it not feel so? The breeze that meets your moves is cold, making you shiver again. Are you having a fever? The thought makes you stop.

Perhaps you are exhausted, emotionally broken and physically weak. This world took everyone you loved...

"I was not born for happiness", you contemplate out loud as your old scars bleed again.

But the metallic breath is heard again. You associate the sound of death and part of you accepts it straightaway: there is little need to flee from it after these years.

Then a voice, in the middle of the dark, whispers:

"I thought you were better than being a quitter, Y/N".

You turn your back instantly. His voice...

"Ani?", you sound surprised, but also hurt.

You were told he was dead, but... How? In order to put end to your doubts, he shows up, dissipating the remaining shadows so he is seen.

Anakin stands right before you strong and healthy, curly hair falling over his neck, just like the last time you two met, except you could see something different in his eyes.

Where there had been a piercing blue painting his irises, now you see a yellow flaring with range. This Sith Lord, seeing how stunned you are, breaks the silence at last:

"Hello, Y/N Y/LN. It’s me. I was wondering if after all those years you’d like…. To meet. If time was supposed to heal all of which we left behind, it did no healing."

You know he is expecting some shocking comments about his darkness, the evident transition behind his eyes. But what you point out is something different than his expectations would meet.

"You are alive. I was told you were dead."

"No. I was never killed, but..."

You frown at him.

"Were you alive all this time? Have you had no consideration whatsoever of what you put me through? The misery that took away my life, the reason why I went grey, losing every reason to live?!"

Seeing you burst into tears like this sensibilizes him. Vader comes to realize his selfishness, but before that how he underestimated you.

"I needed to be powerful", he says, his voice lightly shaken. "For you, Y/N. For you. I did this for you!"

You move to where he is, blinded by tears.

"Well, then. Why didn't you come back for me then?!Where were you when I needed the most? Why couldn't you save me like you claim now...?"

You take his face with your hands, not minding the danger his presence poses to you. As much as you are not a Force sensitive, you are no fool. You know he is different and Lord Vader can tell by your thoughts that reason is telling you to go away.

But where ever reason has been victorious upon sentiment? Not even this powerful Lord is immune to it.

"I do not need your power. I could not care less about any of these things. I want you. When did we stop being against the world?", you struggle to express yourself.

There are indeed one hell of an ocean of sentiments. Silently, they are muted by circumnstances even though Vader knows them well. He is acquainted with every inch of it. Why hiss away? Why not stopping the fight and merely be drowned into you?

Those eyes of yours that denude your soul, which possesses countless scars, are now calling him.

For a thousand stars I would burn for you. I would get burned with you.

No words are needed. He knows what there must be done. Darkness and light are set upon you two. Whoever he is now, he is the same man who pursuited after your love. In the end, it's what matters.

***

Nowadays.

"Green suits you", he whispers, standing behind you, hands resting around your waist.

You two are in the throne room contemplating the endless universe that lies ahead of you. There is peace at long last. The few Jedis that are out there remain in dust, a memory to some, a history to all—an idea that was promptly accepted by your lover and husband, the Emperor.

There is no resistance, nothing that will go against the balance firmly restored. Vader found himself in between shadows and light after a long time merged in struggles with himself.

In a twist of fate, you’ve been rescued twice from this man who is described by his enemies as the bitter mix of mankind and machine, the fall of the brilliant General who became everyone’s worst nightmare.

But to you Anakin remains the same old Anakin. You’ve been at his darkest hours, you’ve seen his insecurities, you’ve shared his part of unspoken fears. He’s been always your other half, your dark angel who saved you from the coldest hell you’ve been yourself.

As you told him the day he took you away from the deadly embrace of the rebels, people wanted to change him, to turn him into something else…all the whilst all she ever wanted was him the way he was.

Now, here you are. His empress. His woman. Better yet, his wife. His eternal paramour. Burning like a thousand stars under a midnight sun.

“I suppose it frees my spirit”, you tell him, turning around so you can have a better sight of him. Anakin, with his old scar, side smirks at you, already aware of your non said intentions. He is dressing his Vader’s robes, though thankfully his handsomeness is not put away with that mask you detest. “It reminds me of the old days, when you told me you knew it was wrong but you longed to have some fun.”

He laughs quietly at the remembrance. He does remember how often he and you misbehaved as children in Tatooine, a bad tendency that followed years later.

“Oh my Maker. Of all the people in the world…” You smile at him, locking eyes as you dance with no song to play in the background of your high spirits. “…you were the one to introduce me to freedom.”

He leans mischievously against you, holding your hand as he pulls you closer against him.

“Not many would describe me as the declarer of liberty”, so Anakin muses sarcastically, letting himself be played by you.

“Since when am I like everyone?”, you snap back, grinning.

He now presses you against the wall, locking your wrists above your head.

“Don’t be snippy at me, young lady.”

You side smirk, tilting your head to the right as your gaze is held by his.

“Or what?”

“You shall be punished.”

There is little need to speak. When his lips finally meet yours, what starts as a slow aching turns into a passionate fever that spreads all over your body.

Right there, in the throne room, you are under his control. He has no modesty in pulling his will above yours, and you gladly comply with it. It takes no more than a few seconds before he has your green gown is removed, letting you completely nude under his gaze.

“You are so beautiful”, he softens, contemplating your y/c eyes, how alluring they are. Anakin sighs, this is the moment where passion gives place to sentiment.

“Let me photograph you into this light”, you manage to release your wrists off his grip so you can hold his face. “You are like the knight of my stories. You are my chosen one.”

“I do not wish to lose you. You sound like a song, and fuck this reminds me of when we were young”, he whispers, leaning his forehead against yours. “I love you, angel.”

As slowly your fingertips start to remove his clothing, tossing away his dark cape, you wrap your legs around his waist. Already with a friction aching in your feminine parts, you, however, are completely emotional.

“I love you, my prince. We may not be younger anymore, but our love, the bond that unites one to the other, is timeless.”

You pursuit his lips and soon the sentimentalism steps aside for passion to arise again. He senses your arousal and does not take any more time before he inserts one finger and then two.

“Ah!”, you gasp in surprise.

“So damn wet for me”, he groans, sensing his own manhood pumps against the leather of his pants in complete rigidness. “This always brings me to the day I felt you for the first time.”

You arch your back, speechless. He tortures you like he knows he does, smirking in delight when seeing you going under his touch, crying out his name.

The throne room is not so quiet anymore as he makes you see stars—not only literally. Vader burns with you in every meaning. His eyes scan your face, moving to your hardened nipples that require his heavenly touch. By using the force, he has where he wants you to be: undone.

You are a mess, but you are not finished yourself. Aware of your impure thoughts, Anakin’s now Vader. And he has you going to his knees.

“Yes, Emperor”, you whisper, voice lightly choked with desire as he uses the Force to hold your wrist behind your back. “What is it you want?”

Caressing your face and moving to your neck, he once more stimulates your nipples before going back to his former position. Putting away his manhood, Vader groans at you.

“I want you the way you want me.”

You side smirk at him, no more playing the innocent one, the role you liked to play before he subdues you to his will. Vader takes a great like of your secretive side too.

And what’s better is that you do like taking him with your mouth, never for a second breaking eye contact.

And so it goes for some time. But before he does come to your mouth, every gentleness dies when you are lifted and, once again pressed against the wall, he slides his manhood within you.

***

Feeling his skin so close against yours, locking bodies when two move as one, is a sentiment that brings pure delight to you. Vader too, he is not indifferent to the waves of emotions that bring you ashore.

“Come to me, angel. Take me to Heaven”, he whispers hotly in your ear like a prayer.

And his hands play a great deal in helping you experience such an unnamed bliss.

“Oh Anakin!”, his name is screamed, overcoming his groans as he comes within you.

“Yes?” Lord Vader smiles down at you, eyes glinting with joy.

You cup his face and peppers it with kisses, so devoted you are to him.

“I love you. By the Maker, I do”, you moan softly.

He rubs his nose against yours, cuddling tight for one single moment.

“So do I, princess”, he whispers against your ear, wiping away some locks of your hair that are glued against your face because of the sweat. “We should better get dressed.”

“We should”, you agree between giggles.

When you two look at each other one more time, it does feel like when you were young again. There is serenity and peace, but now the certainty that nothing will ever stay in your path again.

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