#it’s the same thing with adhd your brain cannot do the jobs it needs to do so why would you prevent yourself

[rockoblanco]

lol talking to a family friend & told him im trying to get diagnosed for adhd bcs the more i learn about it and treatment options the more hope I have that I can have some semblance of a better life for myself and instead of being like “good for you” he’s playing at the “oh but narcotics are stimulants and you’ll get a dependency and you can’t trust big pharma and it’s not worth it.” Like you’re not entirely wrong but you’re incredibly narrow minded & don’t know what you’re talking about if you think that the only medication for adhd are stimulants (there are other drugs that aren’t stimulants that can help to clinically “normalize” an adhd brain), and also like how dare you try and tell me that trying to build a better future for myself where i don’t feel like dying everyday isn’t worth the risk lmaoooooooooo

[not-your-bro]

do you have any ud hcs? It could be anything idc

ooh, free rein! sure sure. josh + chris are def the characters i most frequently rotate in my mind, so some stuff about them off the top of my head...

josh

film studies major. i must admit i don't adhere to the psych major he's given in canon, though director/producer roles aren't my first choice for him either. he goes all-in on tangible stuff for his prank, so i put him in the practical effects arena.

artist in his spare time, but big surprise he's cagey about it. like, chris sees josh's sketchbook in josh's room all the time, but he's never actually looked inside.

with both movie sfx + art, josh is practical > digital, and he only dips into digital effects or art when he absolutely needs to. i just think he's a tactile sort of guy who prefers to make things with his hands, so creating on a screen alone doesn't give him the same satisfaction.

on social media in that he has accounts, but they're sporadically active at best. he can be slow to respond to texts/dms and his responses can be short, which gives off the impression that he's disengaged or bored. he isn't, he just doesn't want to be on his phone.

this is a longstanding hc of mine that i've absolutely mentioned before, but: designed hannah's butterfly tattoo! didn't really understand why, he was like you know your tattoo artist can do one for you, right. but she insisted, and he obliged.

gay as fuck. realized young, came out young, very comfortable. as demonstrated by the fact that, much to everyone's annoyance, he wears shirts that say shit like 'employee of the month at the dick sucking factory' in public.

chris

ok, so i've reached the point where the chris in my mind looks different enough that i get a little jumpscared when i see him in-game LMAO. i hc him both taller and heavier. he's gotta be at least 6 ft. and a chris hartley who's thin is no chris hartley at all. not to me.

does not come from money, like lower middle class. i have two totally different hcs about his family that both feel real to me: one is that he's an only child, his parents divorced when he was a kid (old enough to understand, but not quite a teenager), and he lives with his mom. the other is that his parents are not divorced, and he has a big family - lots of siblings. i've been going with the former in my fic lately, but both work for me. the constant is that his family's economic situation is more precarious than most people in the friend group, and family trips with (and funded by) the washingtons were his primary vacations.

has adhd. i find 'always on his phone bc he just loooves technology' less interesting than 'always on his phone bc he has existing attention problems.' this went undiagnosed for a while, and his performance in school suffered for it.

speaking of, he is not all-around school smart. like, emily may have strengths and weaknesses (even if she'd never admit them), but she can swing As across the board. chris cannot. he's getting good grades in classes that interest him or cater to his solution-oriented brain, but he's terrible in any class where there's no right answer. english, art - he does not get it. love him to death but his media literacy is Bad

bi as fuck, but it was a journey. thought he was straight for a long time, dismissing any attraction to men as a 'who hasn't had gay thoughts' kind of thing. i think it took him a while to come to terms with it bc he had a lot of internalized shit to work through. if a friend came out as bi, he'd have been like cool 👍 but him? surely not! he got there eventually though.

wowee this is long. as a lil bonus hc for another character, i'll add that i don't think jess went to college - i think she went to a hair/beauty school. she loves what a social job it is, getting to chit chat with clients all day, and like josh, she does best when she's working with her hands.

[instantpansies]

Haiii againn :3

Uhmmmm

I was wondering what your general mml hcs are :p

okay i think i'm finally prepared to answer this question!!! i'll preface this by saying i'm much more obsessed w phineas and ferb than milo murphy's law. i love mml very much but i don't have nearly as many Thoughts(tm) about it as i do pnf... even so here's what i've got

i'm not just saying this bc he's the voice actor, i think milo would listen to weird al. that and like '90s-'00s pop hits (basically canon anyway)

melissa has adhd and can't function without variety. she's always multitasking, fiddling, taking hard classes to keep herself occupied

definitely she's the type to really want one of those treadmill desks

that's part of why she gets along so well with milo, it's never the same with him. he's exciting

melissa is the most online of the main kids i think. she probably plays fps games and argues with people who disagree with her on twitter

i think melissa would be a vocaloid fan, lydia got her into it and she passed it on to amanda

btw lydia has been a miku stan since third grade

also melissa likes metal. i have no proof of this but i think she'd like it. good for studying

zack cannot stand metal though, it's grating and he can't hear the lyrics

on the topic of the main kids, i'm not super into shipping or anything but my philosophy is, they all have two hands. so casually speaking i really like the dynamic of simultaneous milo/amanda, amanda/melissa, melissa/zack (i'm not wild about them but if we don't go overboard zalissa is fine), zack/bradley, bradley/milo. they are in a circle holding hands and i like them a lot :3

however like i said that's just for funsies and i dont really really ship anyone there. i do like the dynamics of that particular arrangement though lol!

sara was a tumblr user during the equivalent of superwholock, now that that's not really a thing anymore she's gotten more into analysis and the more geeky side of dr zone fandom. she still watches the old edits though

okayyy i'm kind of obsessed w cavendish and dakota so they r always spinning around in my brain

i think brick and savannah are newer agents than dakavendish, which is why cav is kinda bitter. despite working for the agency for longer, he got stuck with the worst equipment and the most unfulfilling job possible

cav is probably a little frustrated at dakota because of this, but i'd think after so long working w him he's realized that it's not dakota's fault they can't seem to climb the ladder. they're just like that. but obviously he hasn't accepted his fate as we see in the show

dakavendish have been in the same semi-romantic semi-platonic situationship forever. neither of them has said a word. if they knew what a qpr was they'd really like that but they've never heard of it so instead they're just stuck Like That. hopeless idiots my beloved

cavendish watches ancient aliens and all those other sorts of shows about supernatural conspiracies. he half believes them. dakota watches them with him, ironically.

anyways back to the kids. lydia and buford met once at a concert for some famous orchestra, they don't really hang out but they email back and forth sometimes and exchange recipes.

lydia and amanda have been best friends for as long as anyone can remember. it sometimes seems like lydia is just amanda's sidekick, but she just prefers to step out of the way and do her part from behind the scenes. it's less stressful for both of them.

amanda hates candles. just can't stand them. they smell too strong, or never smell right, or they pose a fire hazard, or the shape doesn't fit the vibe she's going for.

related to that i think amanda has some pretty strong sensory aversions, especially to smells and certain textures

milo's backpack is essentially a pocket dimension. it's his hammerspace, so he doesn't need to think too much about what fits or not. he packs it every morning, but the stuff basically comes from already in that hammerspace. there are times when he packs the wrong things (which we see in one episode), but that's because they aren't stored in the backpack and are instead inaccessible to him

basically im saying milo is mary poppins and he can hypothetically access anything he needs at any time. issues only arise when he is caught unaware and unprepared, and that is very rare

milo and sara really like going to creeks. especially when they were little they would go to the nearest creek or pond and wade and look for creatures in the water

baljeet ran a boy bands fan blog back when the lumberzacks were active. he was shouted out once on their old social media and it's still one of his proudest accomplishments.

this isn't really an mml hc but baljeet kind of reminds me of a friend who runs a blog and a youtube channel about some really niche tech and programming stuff, and is also just a normal guy on the internet, so i think baljeet probably does smth similar

amanda and melissa have been academic rivals for a long time, but they have a mutual understanding and it's never gotten nasty. bradley thinks he's melissa's academic rival but honestly she doesn't see him as competition at all

bradley has a pretty big sweet tooth. i'm basing this off the whole carla thing if it wasn't obvious, but he definitely stops by coffee shops after school and gets the sweetest drink he can. ice cream fan as well

tbh i unfortunately do not think much about mort or chad. i dont have any hcs about them

same with the murphy parents :( i like them a lot but i dont have any thoughts abt them rn

elliot is bradley's older cousin who never really got along with him but their parents made them hang out when they were little. i'm going off vibes only here

okay so yeah that's all i can think of for now!!! i'm sure i will think of more later lmao but anyways. mml is such a good show

[foxbirdy]

Help, I'm kinda stupid (bad brain disease and chronic illness shit) and scared but I really am wanting to do field work shit. I'm almost graduated from college but feel like I learned pretty much nothing and don't feel like I'm employable at all. I am highly motivated but I just like, don't know what the future holds!! How do you be a person with a job? How do you do the difficult things you do?

Hello ♥️ before I get into this I must give a disclaimer: I am by no means an expert! I am just some guy. I can share what I've had smacked into me over the course of my adult life, but it's definitely not gospel. Take anything I say about my own lived experience with a grain of salt, because it might not necessarily be true for you! Ok. Disclaimer over, let's get into it:

1 - Anon, you are not stupid. If you almost have a degree, you are killing it! I cannot even tell you how many people I know in field work who hated getting their undergrad with the passion of a thousand suns, and scraped through it by the skin of their teeth! I know lots of people who don't have degrees at all, and have no intention of getting one! Be proud that you almost have your degree.

2 - I do not have my degree! I am still working on it. I have a couple semesters to go. Everything I have done has been in the context of being a student, or someone with some college coursework and some practical experience. My brain is also not designed for the higher education system! The ADHD that makes me miserable in university work (understimulated, unfulfilled, unfocused) is also what makes me thrive in the field (performs best in high-stress environments, prefers novelty to routine, settled by working with my hands and body, excellent multitasker, intense focus on physical project work). Do not equate your ability to be a model college student with your employability.

3 - You already have the chiefest qualification required for fieldwork, which is that you are highly motivated! I've said this before, phrased differently, but the quality that most opportunities are looking for in a candidate is sheer audacity. The willingness to do crazy shit. The belief that you can do anything if you try hard. They need someone who's motivated enough (or unhinged enough) to say things like: "Yes, I will sleep on the ground. Yes, I will eat weird food. Yes, I will hike into work every day, hauling gear. Yes, I will not go crazy if I can't access the internet for weeks at a time. No, I will not turn homicidal if I'm working, eating, and sleeping with the same eight people for months. No, I've never driven a truck and trailer, but I will learn how. No, I don't have that certification, but I will get it. No, I've never used that software, but I will figure it out." If you can a) endure difficulty with enthusiasm, and b) not be phased by unknowns, you are more than halfway there.

4 - Put yourself out there! Drag yourself out of your comfort zone, within reason. Apply to things you think you have no chance of getting! Apply to things that scare you a little! Do research. Figure out what you want to do, and start where you can. Ask for help - it will make you connections! The worst that anyone can say to you is "no," and that isn't so bad. Sometimes it's easy, and sometimes you have to work at a coffee shop for a few months in-between jobs. Sometimes you'll have to wait for weeks to get more information on travel, and sometimes you have to pack your bags and get in your car within 72 hours. Go with the water cycle, move with the ups and downs. Be confident, be adaptable, have audacity, and nail your resume to the door of anything that looks cool. Godspeed and good luck out there!

[that-gay-jedi]

Tbh it seems like I can get super autistic about anything I'm forced to think about often enough for long enough even if it's something I'm not personally or naturally interested in. It's like every job I've had since getting off disability has left a little mini fucking encyclopedia in my brain that just pops out like a springy snake from a Pringles can if you take the lid off.

Back when I worked for a cellphone company I used to answer anyone's technical questions in such rigorous detail that after moving on to the next customer I'd suddenly think "shit I probably overwhelmed/bored that last guy beyond all comprehension and now he knows less than before I gave him information" and I was capable of talking for upwards of 15 minutes uninterrupted just about a single topic like how not to ruin your battery or why you can't just shove any old SIM card from your provider into your new phone anymore etc. One night on my last call of the shift I spent about an hour talking to some guy about the specs of various secondhand phones.

Not only am I not particularly passionate about cellphones, but I'd straight up uninvent certain aspects if I had a time machine. I'm not exactly the guy you would expect to infodump half the user manual into your ear.

I cannot emphasize enough how much I do not, ultimately, care about the world of finance so long as I'm not asked to deal dishonestly with clients, my boss likes my work, and my paycheques keep coming. I loathe capitalism and I keep the ghost of Robespierre hovering above my left shoulder to periodically whisper affirmations in my ear. And yet now that I've had to learn a bunch about it I will ANIMATEDLY give a client a crash course in what the fuck their electronic balance does vs their available balance vs their current balance etc etc, how the release of unverified funds work and why their paycheque doesn't have their employer's name next to it, the difference between holding a Canadian based account that uses U.S. dollars and holding a US-based U.S. dollar account with a Canadian bank, rattle off the top of my head the handful of self-service transactions that can only be done on a computer/laptop and the ones that can only be done on a mobile device, etc etc.

Weirdest of all is now that a large part of my job is to do things like teach nervous elders how to use a visa debit card or book them the first videoconference appointment of their life, sometimes the cellphone shit from my old job becomes relevant and suddenly I'm reassuring a hospitalized client who needs a distance appointment but has technical issues with their phone that if they call the help line of their cellphone provider from another phone while holding the glitching one in their hand, they may get a rep who is trained to patiently guide them through basic troubleshooting steps to get their phone in working order for their banking appointment.

I realize this represents some kind of ADHD-autist survival mode, though luckily it's a world away from the survival mode that got me through 10 years of the way disability/unemployment/etc treat a person- in the long run it does seem to take less out of me overall, which is a scathing indictment of social services. I just wish I could be doing the same thing but with something I actually personally care about, like books or Star Wars or the human brain. Times like this are when I most regret how I got transphobia'd out of massage school because I could happily have spent my life locating minor anatomical landmarks on a bone or showing patients diagrams of their muscles.

[birdofmay]

hi i hope you r doing well I hope it’s ok to ask but i don’t know what support need/level I fit into could u help give any advice/insight?. I read over everything in your pinned but I’m still stuck bc I’m worried to label myself wrongly. can u help at all? I am open to any thoughts u have.. can u relate to my experience at all as a higher support autistic?

I feel like my sensory issue are severe and interfere w my ability to wear most clothes and just daily life stuff, I feel very overwhelmed and broken by change, struggle so much with driving that it’s dangerous, can struggle to process things and do it slowly, I am verbal but have loss episodes and in general barely talk bc social/communication issues,

very difficult to maintain and make relationships, I don’t know if I mask or not bc I feel like even if I were to try to I still seem autistic and mess it up despite some people telling they think I’m high functioning(but then turn around and tell me I’m r slur bc of my autism behaviors), I struggle with hygiene and eating drinking bc I don’t feel the cues or bc of executive dysfunction pain fatigue or sensory issues,

I have motor/pain/muscular issues (mobility worsening and affecting my ability to do things like go up stairs and walk) and I do occupational therapy and it does cause me to not be able to do certain things myself like wash/do my hair and Its a struggle to shower my body too, cannot exercise either bc of POTS

I can go in public but I do it with people bc the surroundings seem overwhelming, I do not have a job currently and I know it would be so hard on me but I am going to college and eventually will be forced to get one, struggle to use utensils to eat and struggle with tasks/instructions when not done right in front of me 1on1 like a million times, I have a lot of stims and a lot of harmful to myself ones, often info dumping about special interest

I can’t handle/fully understand money/taxes/bills, it’s hard for me to prepare meals, struggle to eat much bc of GI issues and jaw fatigue, do laundry, and manage chores, and manage medications, extreme issue with organization, learning disabled, get overwhelmed/meltdown/shutdown very easily

I’m not sure what else to add to take into consideration (can u give ideas) or how to tell which level and support need this fits as .. like I guess I’m not low support bc I do need help with BADLS as I mentioned but I I don’t know if it’s wrong of me to say I’m high support or medium support or a flux of both?.. and have no idea with “levels” I was dx with a level but feel like it’s incorrect .. and based on what I said which BADLS and IADLS do I need help with and how many is that? It’s confusing :(

Here's the relevant section of my FAQ post

"I don't know what support needs I'd be considered!"

Do you have care needs? No? Then you're not high support needs, you're most likely low or low-to-mid support needs.

My country re-assesses my support needs regularly; if you're medium or high support needs and weren't medically neglected your whole life, you'd normally know that you're medium or high support needs already, because that's tested (if you're not sure, check the documents). But testing is different from country to country.

Unless, of course, something happened recently that you now suddenly need a lot of help, definitely more than before. In this case there likely wasn't any testing yet. But in that case I can't help you either, because I don't test you.

Note because this still is a common misunderstanding: The DSM-5 says for example "Autism level 1: Requires support", but the support that's meant there has nothing to do with the support needs we're talking about in this and in the linked post. It's a little unfortunate that both say "support" because people always think it's the same when it really really isn't ☝🏼

I feel like you're mixing up autism levels and support needs still, because the first part of what you wrote (sensory issues, social stuff) is relevant for your level, but not for a support needs/care level assessment.

Maybe read the linked post and the support needs post (linked within the linked post) again but pay attention to the "Who determines if you're low, medium or high support needs (if you have support needs)?" post this time 🤔

Autism levels are given to you by professionals and not to be "guessed" - that's why I don't know what level I'd be considered (we don't have levels), and don't even further think about what level I'd be because I simply don't have a level. You can disagree with the level of course, but when talking about levels you then don't say "I'm level [guessed level]", but "I was diagnosed level [diagnosed level] but think I'm actually higher/lower".

Same goes for support needs. Not "I'm [guessed support needs]" but "I'm [assessed support needs]" or "I think I'm somewhat [guessed support needs]".

It's not a handy personality test self-categorization thing. It's something that's tested. By professionals. Only.

[unholycourier]

Hey do 1 and A for all of your Fallout blorbos >:3c ❤️❤️❤️❤️🥰🥰🥰🥰

oh, you know the way to a man’s heart, sweetheart 🥰💕💕 thank you for these questions @valentineenjoyer !! more under the cut.

1. what’s the maximum amount of time your character can sit still with nothing to do?

lecter d. longfellow ( far harbor hunter )

surprisingly, lecter can sit still for hours at a time but for what he’ll have to be really enthralled in a book or activity to be able to do so. otherwise if there’s no stimulation whatsoever, the longest he can go sitting still is about thirty minutes at best, a few minutes at worst. sometimes he just needs to relax and be by himself with only his thoughts, but sometimes anxiety gets the best of him and he needs to pace and wander. it’s 50/50.

graham hoolahan ( pilot and railroad agent )

graham is surprisingly able to sit still with nothing to do for a significant amount of time! almost a full hour. it usually leads to him falling asleep wherever he’s sitting though.

abigail chambers ( bioscience scientist )

abigail has no time to sit down with nothing to do. she’s got things to do, people to see, and work that needs to get done! who needs rest? definitely not her (it’s definitely her).

quinn higuchi verger ( courier six )

like, five minutes, tops. he can sit down for a quick second and be fine but if nothing is stimulating his brain, he will be a menace. when the first minute kicks in, he’ll start fidgeting and bouncing his leg, by the second minute my man has to do something or he’ll explode. his brain got so fucked up by benny that his untreated adhd basically makes it impossible for him to just do nothing for any period of time. he has to do something; whether it’s collecting mugs for muggy, petting rattle, or cleaning every spec of dust off his weapons.

agnes higuchi verger ( mercenary )

unlike her twin brother, agnes actually loves to sit down with nothing to do. being a mercenary means you’re on your feet most of the time, and making your own clothes means you’re sitting and still working. so, really, she’ll take not doing something for once and just sit for an hour simply relaxing and daydreaming about whatever (bonus points if she gets to cuddle her girlfriend while at it.)

sycamore higuchi ( vault 76 wastelander )

honestly, they’re prone to sit for hours on end and do nothing but stare out into the open. they’re prone to sudden bursts of the inability to still and won’t be able to sit for more than a few minutes without doing something. it’s also 50/50 for them.

rory lavender ( former vault-tec scientist )

sitting down tinkering with weapons is his job, physically cannot just sit around and not do something. he’ll do nothing when they’re dead or asleep.

rattle ( quinn’s pet nightstalker )

rattle is just a little creature who shares the same inability sit still as her owner. she’ll sleep for an hour and jump right back up to bother anyone or anything she can.

egan ( hybrid deathclaw )

egan can sit for hours without nothing to do. being part aquatic, his favorite past time is to rest underwater and just watch the fog and the angler lights move across the surface of lakes.

rowan ( sycamore’s ( deceased ) deathclaw )

rowan was trained to hold still, stalk, and watch for potential dangers; so truly, similar to egan; he also had no qualms over sitting still and was able to hold position for just as long, though far more eerily still like a gargoyle statue.

a. why are you excited about this character?

BOY HOWDY DO I HAVE SO MUCH TO SAY ABOUT THIS. i adore all my ocs equally and they all make me just as excited when i talk about every each one of them, but for this, i’ll set the stage lights on quinn and lecter.

for one, lecter was the first fallout oc i ever made. he was originally a sole survivor, but as time went on and i played thru far harbor, i noticed that the main story for sole survivor didn’t click with me and i didn’t enjoy this pre-made story set on my character, so i turned him into a synth sole, and eventually, into his own oc, who was raised by longfellow and was later replaced by a synth (unbeknownst to synth lecter). his story is one of not feeling as though he belongs. that he’s a burden, unwanted, and a mistake; something that’s symbolized through his hastily put together framework. and his story progression and development just make me proud of him, even more so when some of his mental health and sentiments about himself are part of my own, i’m proud to see my little dude heal. i’m proud to make him his own oc to the fallout universe.

i played fallout 4 thru my formative years, and i also played fallout new vegas thru my formative years, and out of the two i think new vegas has left an even bigger impact on me because i can’t even think of that game without getting emotional. and that’s why, my courier quinn, is so beloved and special to me. he’s unhinged, he’s insane, he’s a menace and i love him for it. despite playing this franchise for so long i didn’t fully develop quinn’s behavior and personality until now and i wouldn’t have it any other way with how he turned out as a character. he’s an immature lil mf with a sassy tongue and i love it. i’ve developed even a whole ancestry line for him and I’m so invested in his family tree as a whole. there is so, so much to him as a character as there is as a creation of mine that i hold extremely close to me. like, i can’t even fathom playing new vegas without just making quinn over and over again lol.

not to mention that you gifted me fallout new vegas when we met, @valentineenjoyer, so that also makes both the game and quinn a super, super cherished memory. ;)

[audrinawf]

audri help me! I'm so overwhelmed I can't get out of bed. I have graduated from college a year ago and I still don't work, I feel like I haven't learned anything and that all jobs require minimal knowledge. then I tried to make a study plan, but it seems that I need to learn so much, that I'm so late that I want to do a thousand things during the week and it's driving me crazy! I can't imagine myself in a calm, slow routine because my brain is screaming WE'RE LATE! THERE IS NO TIME! THERE IS NO TIME! and it paralyzes me in every possible way. I can't even stop and breathe and plan just the basics. it's killing me this anxious need and this feeling that time is passing and I can't do anything with it.

Hi! Okay so first of all brace yourself cause my answer is going to be so long lol but anyways I just had a similar conversation with a friend just yesterday and I was telling her that it’s so important to remember that you cannot always achieve everything you want in one single day. I’m ngl I feel like your feeling a lot and that’s cause I have adhd so time management isn’t my strongest skill. You can’t excel at 5 different things on the same day. Some days you need to prioritize work and some days you prioritize the gym and that’s normal. One thing that really helped me was realizing that I’m not a type A personality, I’m not a perfectionist and I’m not compulsive so I wasn’t going to compare myself to those types of people and make myself feel bad. Some people just have it in their dna to do 537 things in one day and that’s fine but if that’s not your strength don’t worry.

You need to stop thinking that you’re late. Quit that thinking right away. You’re not late. And even if you feel that way just know that 6 months of focus and determination can set you forward much more than you can imagine. I wasn’t doing jack shit for two years during covid so from 2020 to late 2021 I was living at home miserable while a lot of people younger than me were out there starting business and doing lots of cool things. But you know what happened since November 2021? I moved twice, I own my own home, I’m the youngest in my friend group to do so and the first in my family since my parents have rented their whole lives and on top of that I traveled 4 times in less than a year, I got engaged and learned probably 5 new hobbies in less than a year. I thought I was late too but I wasn’t. I’m just telling you this cause you can actually achieve more in 6 months that you’ve done in years. Please be patient and have faith.

And now onto why I think you should do in the meantime, I think you need to start meditating even if it’s just for 3 minutes a day and do some light working out. I know it’s not fun but I promise that it clears your head so much and give you so much energy to do more throughout the day.

One thing that’s helped me a lot is to for one do a daily brain dump so I just take a blank paper or journal and write everything I’m thinking, it doesn’t even have to be in any order but just imagine taking all your anxious thoughts and placing them on paper. You don’t even have to read it just throw it away if you want. So once you’ve written down all the noise in your brain the second thing I would do is to get a timebox journal. You can Google time box journal and just print the ones you find online or if you message me privately I can send you my time box that I created cause I use it every single day even when I’m just chilling cause it really helps you see how much you can achieve in one day and it helps you better your time managing skills.

But please remember that for one you need to quit your mind first of all. Second you need to make small changes every day. I wasn’t even 1% as productive a year ago as I am today. I’ve incorporated small changes and small but productive habits to my daily routine for a year

Hope any of this helps you <3

[brad-bakshi-loves-bugs]

oh my gosh, did you just say you roleplay in your room?? dude (gender neutral)!! that’s so smart. and also really cute..:)

you talked about having ADHD. i’ve been having some trouble lately and i was wondering what it looks like for you? just to get an idea wether i might need to check it out or not.

thank you, i think...? this is the strangest ask ive ever received but i think being called cute is a compliment LMAO so ty

so like. adhd looks different in everyone it affects, and i always recommend reaching out to a psychiatrist or even just your physician if you suspect you might have some Fucky Stuff going on with your brain! i was diagnosed with adhd when i was 10 which is pretty telling for how severe mine is because they dont usually diagnose afab kids that young LMAO but again. everyone is different!

HOWEVER i will start this off by saying that i also have severe bipolar 1, which has a lot of overlapping symptoms with adhd. im not a psychiatrist, a psychologist, or a therapist (or any other -ist), and i couldnt tell you which of my Problems are adhd and which are bipolar. so here's your disclaimer to please not use me as the deciding factor for whether or not you have adhd! my adhd personally is life-altering and essentially ruined my childhood for various reasons, and it's still something i struggle with daily. not every case is so severe (most aren't, in fact), so take everything i say with a grain of salt!

but here's a list of things i attribute to my adhd, which is very far from a complete list, but it's what i can think of off the top of my head:

i HATE silence. whenever im doing anything i have to be playing music or listening to something or i cant focus at all, but it also cant be New Music or ill just get distracted and not be able to focus

on the flip side, i also cant fully concentrate if i have any sort of noise. so if im trying to have a serious conversation that requires my full attention, i have to turn off all music and essentially block my ears so that i can focus. no i dont know why but its SO FUCKING ANNOYING

i alternate between skipping every song halfway through because i get bored quicker than a song can finish or listening to the same song for 6 hours on loop and still wanting to listen to more of it. seriously, i listened to rockstar sea shanty by nickelback almost 400 times this year alone, and i only just discovered it in august

when i hyperfixate, i cannot do ANYTHING else or i get massively depressed and lose all motivation. i ended up in a psych ward back in october because the thought of doing my (easy and otherwise enjoyable) job made me self-harm because i was hyperfocused on watching a specific show and i couldnt do ANYTHING else. im a terrible employee

time management? not here! im late to EVERY SINGLE THING. i had an interview yesterday and i was late by 15 minutes. when i was working at petsmart, i can count on both hands the number of times i showed up to work on time in an ENTIRE YEAR. i have no idea why im like this and i hate it

i pace. a LOT. like, i spend several hours a day pacing. i literally just walk around my kitchen and living room and bedroom aimlessly. im like an npc, but instead of giving you helpful tips i just give you really shitty one liners and puns until you beat me to death

if im not pacing, im doing SOMETHING. whether im biting my nails, popping my knuckles, bouncing my leg, bobbing my head, anything. its physically impossible for me to sit still. like right now, im sitting at my desk typing on my keyboard, but im also shaking my legs violently and bobbing my head to the music im currently playing (it's hicktown by jason aldean. yeah, i enjoy country music. im a redneck sorry)

i SUCK at multitasking. like, even just listening to something and writing. or listening to someone and watching tv. or listening to two things at once. okay, so im starting to think im just really bad at listening. but STILL. my mom can work and watch tv at the same time, but if i try to do that i just end up watching tv and i cant get anything done. i absolutely cannot concentrate if two things are happening at once

i cant watch movies. i literally spend more time rewinding and playing back whatever i missed while i was checking my phone than i do actually watching the movie. im the same way with tv shows unless im hyperfixated on them, but at least theyre shorter so i can take more breaks

again, this is not a complete list. nor does this mean that if you check all of these boxes then you also have adhd, or that if you dont check them then you dont. i cannot stress enough that adhd affects every person differently. thats why its such a bitch to diagnose, and why the symptoms overlap with so many other illnesses and disorders.

i do hope that some of this helped! i have no issues with talking about my own mental problems because im a very firm believer that they should be destigmatized and more often talked about publicly, but i try to limit how often i bring up my own issues unless someone directly asks about them because i know not everyone wants to hear about them and that's fine too!

[rynrambles]

UH I don’t usually like to talk about my personal life because I desire to be an enigma, like the contents of a Costco hot dog. But at the same time, I felt like I just wanted to scrape all this out of my head and put it somewhere else. It’s a long read, and I don’t expect anyone to trudge through it, but at least these things aren’t stuck in my brainspace, rattling their cages anymore. 

--

To preface, I’m equal parts torn between “Bro, you’re overthinking this, no one cares”, “everyone cares a LOT, and you’re potentially opening a big can of worms here,” and “are you truly explaining yourself, or just making excuses for yourself?” (The answer being: I honestly don’t know.)

The thoughts are so disjointed, all vying for my attention with the same urgency and insistence. I desperately want to put them in order, line them up neatly, clearly, concisely, but it ends up being a very “herding cats” sort of endeavor; As soon as I turn my attention to one thought, the other 27 have disappeared, gotten into something they shouldn’t have, or barfed on the carpet.

At the core of it all, I want to say that I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I’ve not been particularly reliable in recent years. Obviously, I do not enjoy disappointing people; I don’t like failing to meet expectations, making promises that go unkept, disappearing for months on end, etc. I cannot stress how inadequate and ashamed I feel because of it. Yet the scrambled eggs I call my brain fights me tooth and nail every time I try to do anything about it. 

I know this is the most autistic thing imaginable, but please allow me to compartmentalize and elaborate on some thoughts that have been tumbling around in my head.

The Mental Health thing:

I’m trying to get better about working with my bipolar2. I can prolong my manic phases in a way that allows me to get more work done for a longer period of time, and I can cushion the blow of depressive phases. But I still feel the push and pull of these cycles. 

The downswings are the primary reason why I simply disappear at times, and it feels like a herculean effort to claw my way out of the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad pit of despair and 14 hour depression naps.

But then the upswings have me chasing novelty: prioritizing ephemeral, unimportant things over projects that I really need to get done. There is no negotiating with the ADHD brain to work on a task. Guilt, bargaining, bribery, blackmail, reason, logic, it’s all thoroughly ineffective. I might as well be trying to move mountains. I'm getting better at structuring things in a way where I'm able to do "fun, exciting, new projects," while also doing my gotdamned job, but it's still something I'm working on.

The Physical Health thing:

I once told one of my closest friends that I felt she and I, with all our similarities in mind and body, were cut from the same cloth. She replied “yeah, but it’s cheesecloth,” and I’ve laughed about it every day since. 

She’s chronically ill, much more so than I, but there’s a sort of… guilt-laced comfort in knowing that we’re not alone, that someone does understand to a similar depth and degree. 

But it’s still bullshit, yaknow? I’m tired of migraines that render me temporarily blind multiple times a week, I’m tired of the disruptive visual disturbances and hand tremors making it difficult to draw. I’m tired of tachycardia, palpitations, breathlessness, fatigue, nausea. And I’m tired of being shuffled between cardiologists, endocrinologists, pulmonologists, ophthalmologists, one specialist after another. Endless referrals. Numerous tests. Give us your blood, pee in this cup, try this diet, take these medicines. And the final verdict is always “hmm, we’re not sure what’s wrong.”

I don’t understand why my own body insists on fighting me at every turn. I give you water and walkies and sunlight every day, you ungrateful lump of flesh.

The art & friends thing:

I think enough people are aware that I had a huge falling out with my friend group some years back. There were rumors and accusations I wanted to address, but I was always worried things would blow up all over again. One can’t simply put out a statement and expect the involved individuals will have nothing to say in turn. And that’s only fair, right? The mere act of “defending” myself calls their integrity into question, so shouldn’t they be around to offer the counterbalance of their personal experiences and reasoning?

But ultimately, neither party wants to dredge up and rehash the same shit all over again. It’s exhausting. It’s emotionally taxing. And in the end it all boils down to he-said she-said anyway. 

So I’ve done my best to just be okay with it. Like, I did cause a lot of problems anyway, so maybe it’s penance for my wrongdoings. I don’t know. 

Moral deliberations aside, I found myself abruptly without friends. Emotionally devastating to be sure, but it also had an additional aftereffect of leaving me without artistic colleagues who could encourage creativity, offer input and opinions, redline my work, etc. And because artists cannot grow in a vacuum, I began to stagnate. 

To say nothing of the perpetual rumination whenever I would sit down to draw. It was the same unpleasant thoughts, over and over again on repeat. Day in and day out. 

So I stopped drawing.

Onwards:

Since then, I’ve slowly healed. I reconnected with my childhood friends and I cannot possibly express the amount of love and joy they’ve brought to my life. Likewise, my beloved husband has been nothing but supportive and encouraging, despite the literal years of me sort of moping around, aimless and without purpose. I look back at how I’ve spent the past half decade and I hate this languishing creature that has worn my face but contributed nothing of value to my life. 

I want to be me again, and I want to be productive and creative, not because of (mandatory) hustle culture, but because it genuinely makes me happy. Like, not to be a goober but isn’t it kinda magical to be able to see something in your head or have a vague idea and then conjure it into existence through art/writing/music?  That shit is cool as hell. I wanna do magic. And I want to feel proud of myself for accomplishing something. Maybe it’s capitalist brainwashing but productivity scratches the constant itching in my brain.

Ultimately:

So, that’s where I sit now, getting back on the horse for the umpteenth time and hoping I can do a little better than before. Perhaps, with the knowledge of what has and hasn’t worked in the past, I can hold on longer, recover faster. 

I want to thank everyone who has continued to cheer me on through it all. There are some names I’ve seen pop up again and again over the years, offering me kindness and patience well beyond what I deserve. You’ve always made me feel like it was worth it to dust myself off and try again, encouraging me ever onward. Even though you owe me nothing. Even though it can be difficult to gather that energy, and harder still to turn those thoughts into words. 

So from the bottom of my heart, thank you.

[jessefandomunited]

I honestly feel like it's a trait in people using ADHD as an excuse to be shit victim-complex friends. You are not the issue here, and there's only so much of a good friend you can be before you start pulling pieces of yourself off in the hopes that it'll make them happy.

Spoiler: It won't make them happy.

You're 28. I'm 29. We're both learning at the similar time that sometimes, it's better to let go of a friendship that's hurting you than keep going just because it's been ten years. I knew my austic ADHD friend since we were both like 13, and yeah, quietly taking more space for myself until we couldn't hear each other any more was tough at first. But then I realised how beautiful that quiet was - it let people who didn't want to use me speak up, and their voices were more beautiful. I've had other friends for 10 years, 9 years... it doesn't matter the length of time. People change, and they see you changing, too. And sometimes, if they don't like what they see you changing into (usually because it makes them feel shitty about themselves because while you're moving on, they're still stuck in the same place and don't want to move on), they'll try in vain to bring you down with them, or they'll be horribly mean. I've had both done to me, and letting go of the friendships has been liberating.

Do yourself a favour. Be your own main character.

Yours with love, one of your supporting characters <3

It really means a lot that you said that and let me tell you you are much more than one of my supporting characters because that was wonderful. I think what gave me the most pause was I have been looking on redit and tik tok trying to find people in similar situations and a lot of adhd people were on both sides . Like there were far fewer saying “ you need to stop using adhd as an excuse” because it like pushed the thought that adhd people are lazy . And I don’t think that I think continuing saying that about anything will limit what your brain believes you can do. I mean it took me a while to stop using my anxiety as an excuse to blow up someone’s phone if they texted me something I could see as mean. It was a terrible trate and I didn’t want that part of me to ruin my friendships. So I worked on it. I think for anyone if it’s important to you, you’ll work on it and if you coddle yourself in your brain too much you will not grow. Like if I have a headache but get over it and I’m good to run but I coddle myself and say “ nooo you were just in pain you don’t need to” then the next thing I know almost two months have gone by and I only ran like two or three times ( still getting my 10000 steps though so not worry lol).

But it’s like I know that their brain works differently but i think because of that it’s your job to figure out how to make sure you get your adult responsibilities done. Like they don’t seem to forget to go to work or their work schedule, or their job duties at work , or that rent is due. Like what do they do to remember that. And all I’m asking for is for them to text me or reach out personally, a real apology where they take accountability and for us to have a sit down talk or phone call. If they cannot do that to save our friendship, then I feel like there really wasn’t much of a friendship to begin with, which hurts to even think about.

If you’re still reading this you’re a trooper and I will say I’m surprisingly not as doom and gloom as I sound. I’ve actually been pushing myself to become the person I wanna be. While Amy wants to stay in side and binge more criminal minds and rennfeild till my mind bleeds. My other ideal self Piper has been pushing me to do more activities. She downloaded meetup and we’ve gone out to singles night and a sound bath thing ( which was so relaxing). She’s made me say yes when people ask me to hang out after an even that went till 10. She’s pushed me to make sure I’m consistently trying to plan things with my grandma and siblings because even though , yes they can plan too, I’m okay with doing a little extra to get some one on one time with them. I’ve been trying to cut down how much I do it with my friends because I think it should be mutually planning unless it’s a theme park trip I will plan that lol. She’s pushed me to journal in a coffee shop every Saturday morning as a consistent thing I can look forward to. I’ve been trying new styles , taking myself on more dates , and hardest of all, actually spending money on myself. I’ve stopped worrying about gas and have been over to my other friends house more because I typically just wanted people to come over to mine ( especially when I was planning it). I’ve been really shifting myself to be the person I want to be a kind magnetic person that people just love to be around. That is my goal and I’m getting there , I already feel more positive about my life as a whole and I feel like I’m finally actually living it.

Wow that brought a lot out of me, thank you again for that I feel really at peace about the whole situation. It’s just whenever I think about it it just makes me a bit upset with how I’ve been treated. But it’s good to revisit those emotions just to remember it’s okay to feel them, but not to wallow in them.

[cardiacginger]

　　　. 𝙥𝙞𝙣𝙣𝙚𝙙 𝙥𝙤𝙨𝙩

^ [ deets: its what the people crave! ]

below the line break, you'll find 𝐦𝐮𝐧 𝐢𝐧𝐟𝐨 , 𝐫𝐮𝐥𝐞𝐬 & 𝐚 𝐭𝐚𝐠 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 for your blog browsing convenience. feel free to check out the [ carrd ] if that's more your style ☆

⤷ follows back for @theostaltos

general blog cw // swearing, violence, toxic/unhealthy mindsets

　

　　　. 𝙦𝙪𝙞𝙘𝙠 𝙖𝙗𝙤𝙪𝙩 [1]

mun is 24, she/her, writes out of CST in tennessee.

i'm amy, tend to go by trill on the internet, whichever is easier to remember. i never bite & i live ready to 'yes and' any ideas that come my way, so please drop in my inbox/dms. i always want to plot, the wilder the better. this blog is run very casually, but i do stay mostly on-topic and tag my ooc if you'd rather just see one piece content. also, full admission, i'm a fake fan that gets op info from my wife and youtube clips, so please forgive if i make a mistake about canon. long shows and my adhd simply cannot get along, but i adore this fandom and character so i work through.

i work a high-stress full-time job and my brain doesn't always choose Focus, so expect lulls and swells in activity!

　

　　　. 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙧𝙪𝙡𝙚𝙨 [2]

 [ 01 ]  all interactions are zero pressure! never feel obligated to message, reply, etc. i am never offended by you getting busy or stressed and not getting around to tumblr things.

 [ 02 ]  this blog is selective, but not limited to mutuals. feel free to shoot me a message / ask / meme if you want to interact! i’ll check your blog and follow if we vibe. if i’m already following you, i think you’re awesome and i actively want to rp with you, so feel free to shoot something over if i haven’t already.

 [ 03 ]  i have a busy life outside of tumblr and horrible adhd, so i have to ask for some patience for all things related to this blog. rp is for fun, not something to stress over, and i extend that understanding to myself as well as everyone i write with.

 [ 04 ]  all things nsfw and ooc will be tagged accordingly. see below for the tag list

 [ 05 ]  this goes without saying but i’ll say it anyways: no godmodding, no powerplaying, no nsfw content with or involving minors.

 [ 06 ]  multi-threads are loved and welcome! feel free to drop threads as you need, send in as many memes as you want, turn askbox replies into threads, write a bunch of starters and tag me; i’m always up for more, and will never bug you about old rps.

 [ 07 ]  i’m here for just about any ships, be them crackships, hateships, smutships, classic ships, all of them. i’m also here for every flavor of non-romantic connections. however, the right vibe isn’t always there, and i will always discuss any kind of relationship with my partner beforehand. i refuse to be pressured into shipping of any kind, and won’t push my ships on anyone.

 [ 08 ]  all threads and relationships are in parallel universes, unless otherwise noted.

 [ 09 ]  i don’t have an issue rping with multiple blogs of the same character. if i’m already writing with a law, and you’re a law, bring your law. the more the merrier!

 [ 10 ]  i’m open to rping with ocs as long as there’s a detailed page describing them. multi-muse blogs stress me out for some reason, but i’m always open to checking them out to see if they’re an exception. fandom crossovers completely depend on my familiarity with the fandom. like all things tho, shoot me a message and we’ll see!

 [ 11 ]  outside of crack threads, i tend to write multi-para response. no need to match length!

 [ 12 ]  i absolutely crave darker themes, and if i have limits for anything involving 18+ characters, the internet hasn’t found them yet. if you find one, i’ll tell you, and i’ll always respect my partners limits. that said, feel free to pitch your worst. we can be muse torture buddies ~

 [ 13 ]  i’m always open to aus, crazy setting/theme-smashes, and wild plots. i’ve usually got plenty of ideas to springboard off of, and i love co-building. you’re welcome in my inbox with or without concepts on-hand; we’ll make something!

　

　　　. 𝙩𝙖𝙜 𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩 [3]

 

[ 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐥 ]

out of the c. ] // ooc posts

thread. ] // rp threads

askbox memes. ] // ideas, starters, etc that can be sent

answers. ] // askbox replies

amys art. ] // art by me

aesthetic. ] // just vibes

nsfw // sexual content

 

[ 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬 ]

spooky month 2022. ] // hallo posts for '22

 

Thanks for reading! ☆

[obaewankenope]

My niece enjoys reading but she struggles with pronunciations of words that don't sound how they're spelt. It doesn't stop her from enjoying reading and wanting to do it, though. Her learning difficulties make it hard for her but she does it because she enjoys it.

We all struggle through life trying to do things we either enjoy or don't.

For neurotypical people, it's not a question of whether or not they can do they things they don't enjoy but a matter of just doing it because it has to be done.

That's not the case for neurodiverse people.

For adhd and autism, it's very dependent on how engaging the things are and how they relate to any interests an autistic or adhd person has.

For depression, it's very dependent on being necessary and treated like it's either the Most Important Thing Ever To Do, or something that is just another motion to perform. There may be no joy in it, but if it's performed then it's over and done with.

For learning difficulties and disabilities, it's very dependent on how things are described, how complex they are, and what the end result Has To Be.

In all these cases, there's always an issue with the question of Can. The issue is that it doesn't matter how much a neurodiverse person may Want or Need to do something, whether or not it's something they enjoy/find unpleasant, it's almost physically Impossible to do the thing because the Brain Refuses To Cooperate.

Imagine you're standing in front of an electric fence. You try to put your hand on it. Your brain will literally stop you from doing so. In almost every case, you cannot touch that electric fence. You might manage it if you psych yourself up and try real hard, but that still isn't a guarantee.

In most cases, you won't manage to touch that fence. Your hand will freeze close to it, maybe even close enough to feel the electricity humming in the fence. But that last distance won't be closed.

You simply cannot do it.

That's what it is like to have a neurodiverse mind sometimes. That's what it's like to be neurodiverse.

You want to touch the fence because it's something you Have To Do, but your brain is saying No, No Thanks, We're Not Doing That and you end up stuck.

And the people who can touch the fence look at you standing there, unable to touch it, and judge you because "look, I'm touching the fence because it's my job and I gotta do it, I don't enjoy it but it's what I need to do, why are you being so lazy".

Sometimes, sometimes my niece just Can't Do The Work she's assigned from school during this period of lockdown and more home schooling. She tries but her brain is physically refusing to let her.

So she gets upset. She gets frustrated. She cries. She tries to avoid answering. She'll say the wrong answer because all she cares about is just giving an answer at this point and Moving On.

It's easy to get frustrated back. It's easy to get mean. It's easy to not understand because I'm not her.

But she's trying and she might be failing at the work but she's trying and trying hard. It's hurting her to try so hard because she's fighting against her own brain with her mind. That's Hard.

Being neurodiverse is a constant battle with your own brain and body, neuroses and anxieties. It's so easy to be cruel and judging when you're not the one on the front line.

It's so easy to call others lazy because you don't see and don't understand the mountain they've had to climb without equipment just to reach the same starting line as you just strolled up to.

My niece is trying. She's always trying.

Her reading will improve with time and encouragement.

It will never improve with judgement and cruelty in the guise of motivation.

To be neurodiverse is to be in a war without end; there are only brief periods of rest spent around campfires with others in the same war and occasional civilians who judge the time spent around campfires just resting to be a "waste of time" and "lazy".

This is what it is to be neurodiverse. This is what it is to be autistic, adhd, depressed, learning disabled, and so on. This is what it is to be Abnormal. And that's okay.

The world and people may say and imply otherwise. But there's nothing wrong with trying to do something and finding your brain won't let you. Brains just be like that, sometimes.

[interact-if]

hello saw your last post about ADHD and thought i’d ask i know this might not be the right place to ask so if you want to ignore this or do not know how to answer this i understand, i’ve been working on project and i tried to learn coding i’m still trying watching more videos on it but i am starting to feel stupid because my brain genuinely cannot process any of that information i really cannot understand no matter what and am this close to giving up so i thought maybe if i could find someone that can help me with coding if anyone is willing to do that like i can pay them through paypal

Hi!

So, as a person with ADHD myself (Roast, hi), I get it! It's frustrating, confusing, and information you just read just goes right out the window--but me and the other mods encourage you to learn.

Coding isn't easy, it's a different language and should be treated as such--you're not going to pick it up in a week or even a month, but once you know it you'll be able to navigate it a lot easier.

I'd suggest going back to basics, making sure you've got those down before moving on. If videos aren't working for you (I know they don't really for me) I'd move to written tutorials as well as code-diving on sites that you like their aesthetic of. Start with a project that's not related to your game like a simple webpage and fiddle with the code.

Doing has always been a better educator for me than sitting there trying to absorb knowledge through lecture. I don't remember anything that gets told at me, hello high school and college--but doing has always been better.

If you're working with HTML & CSS it's difficult! But there are resources for you and we also have a lot of helpful people over in our discord server that are happy to help, myself and other mods included.

Also, you might want to try checking out your local library, they might have access to professionally made instructional videos that all you'll need to get in on them is a library card.

TL;DR Slow down, switch to different learning abilities if videos aren't working for you, write things down but only the necessary and keep it brief, for me writing notes needs to be succinct or else my brain just goes fuzzy--and keep those notes on hand while you work, I had to reference them loads of times before getting used to cscript.

Resources

Our discord! Lots of helpful people and crowd-sourcing problems is always a good idea. [Discord Link]

W3 schools is great for trying to find small tutorials on how each element in code works, or if you're looking for a specific function. [W3 Schools Link]

Freecodecamp is a bit more class-based but I'd give it a shot, same with Mimo because it leads you through projects to learn code instead of just throwing information at the wall and hoping it sticks. [Freecodecamp] [Mimo]

JSfiddles and codepen are both sites that let you play around with code without actually implementing it on a webpage--so fiddle to your heart's content! [Jsfiddle] [Codepen.io]

If you can afford it, skillshare also has great starter videos, I learned the CSS grid just this weekend with a video on there, they might have some free trials going on too. [Skillshare]

If, in the end, you just don't want to learn it/can't get a hold of it, that's okay. There are tutors out there and maybe even someone in our community who would be willing to help tutor you, but you can also put up posting for coders--but that is a contract job position and should be treated seriously with proper pay. I'd really really encourage you to take a break, take a step back, but with the intent of learning because that is way more empowering than paying someone else to do it.

With ADHD it's often trying to find what kind of adaptive skills you need to get it through to your brain, and every person with ADHD is different in that regard. For me, I have three different planners that I look at every day, writing things down helps with the permanence issue if not the out-of-sight-out-of-mind issue.

Will I remember what I wrote down? Nope! Will I look down and see it if I leave my planners open and therefore remember? You betcha!

Reach out to our discord, see if you can't get things working for you, and best of luck! <3

[thevirgodoll]

hi! i was wondering if you have any tips to stay organized and stay on task? i’ve been doing a short online course this year and have really struggled to ACTUALLY bring myself to do the work, as assignments and lessons are not under any time constraints i just don’t do it. i also have adhd so get bored or distracted easily. do you have any tips for me?

This is really close to me because I also have ADHD. I have both inattentive and hyperactive type. *As a result, this academic tip guide will be a guide for people with ADHD and not neurotypical people, without disability. There is a difference.*

I am doing online as well this semester.

1. I create a schedule. If I do not create a schedule, I will be unproductive the entire day. So, what will help you is to do things in orderly fashion.

For example, at 12p - I will do this assignment/watch this lecture. You have to dictate what time you’re doing everything. Then, you also have to block out technology distractions while you are working. 

-> Even if you’ve gotten halfway through the day with no schedule, write down or block off times on your digital calendar for what you are going to do at each time. ADHD is easier to tackle if you break things down into smaller tasks.

*Pro tip that I almost forgot: before you do anything, wear your day clothes. Don’t wear pajamas. Actually getting dressed or even doing hair/makeup changes things.

2. Download the Forest app after you have created your schedule. I consistently recommend this because it works in increasing productivity. It allows you to set it for however long you’re doing this task, say 30 minutes.

-> Why?: It will block all apps on your phone for (insert time here) to plant a tree, and if you leave the app your “tree” will die. Eventually, the more sessions you do, the more points you will gain to plant different plants, and eventually plant real trees around the world.

3. Have a list (& a planner) as well. Not only is the schedule creating structure, but the list creates even more structure so you know what you need to get done for the day. It also helps you not fall victim to the classic symptom of forgetting. Each day, you should write down what you WANT to get done and create your own times to look at lecture and assignments. Have goals for the day.

For example: complete assignment 2.

If you do not have expectations with yourself before the day begins, your ADHD will kind of take over and do something else. I have structure to my day. I set a timer to wake up at the same time. I take my ADHD medicine 90 minutes before my final wake up time, and I do my morning routine once it kicks in. Having the same routine helps.

-> Focus on your goals. Don’t be super harsh about the times.

-> Don’t overwhelm with how many things on to do list. Again, break it up into small tasks. For example, one part being: Wash dishes or fold laundry. It makes it less overwhelming to your brain and gives you a choice of which task. Typical non ADHD people just tell you to prioritize tasks but that doesn’t work for us. Do it in a random order and it gets the job done.

4. TAKE BREAKS! The other side to this is making sure that you give yourself adequate breaks.

*For hyperfocus, wait til your hyperfocus has started to wear off. Use it to your advantage for peak productivity. It is no joke.*

-> The misconception is that some people with ADHD are lazy and as a result, some ADHDers won’t take breaks. You can take a break. Healthy, long breaks do more for you long term.

-> Have a timer set. For example, after a 45 minute session or an hour session, I will take a break to do another task that has nothing to do with studying, like laundry, eating a snack, or stretching. Then after that task is done, I will go back to studying.

5. Have a workspace. Only do work at this space. I do schoolwork at my living room table and it is perfect. I do not study in my room because that is my sanctuary for relaxation and rest, not productivity. Make an effort to make the workspace clean, with your supplies - laptop, notebooks, pens, etc - readily available.

-> Once I get to my workspace, everything for the morning is already done. I’ve done my morning routine, so all there is left to do is hydrate while I study.

6. Recognize if you have adequate energy to do the task. Sometimes, with ADHD you may neglect your needs. If you are not getting enough rest, here are some tips:

•Bed should be for rest only.

•Blackout curtains

•Lavender essential oil, I have a diffuser but you can also put it on your pillow

•Background noise: pick what you want, lo fi music, rain sounds, binaural beats, singing bowls

•If all else fails, ADHD is often comorbid with other illnesses, meaning you could have a form of depression causing insomnia for example. This should be considered if you are having long term issues and symptoms.

7. Don’t overdo it. We are not neurotypical. Executive dysfunction is real - meaning our brains actually shut down when it perceives a task to be mundane.

-> You do not have to fit everything into one schedule for the sake of being “productive”. Each day should be what you know you can do, and there are different days to tackle different goals.

-> When you feel like you cannot continue, which is literally a symptom of ADHD, sit still for a few minutes.

8. Have a “What I Did Today” List. Because of how ADHD actually makes us feel, we don’t realize how much work we have put in. ADHD actually can be explained easily, we have about 2 dopamine workers showing up to work while most people are at maximum capacity. We are working overtime to do our best, even on medicine. So, acknowledging what we did today is good and encouraging, or at least reflecting in a journal.

9. Play music. It’s recommended to play study music without words because with ADHD we will submerge ourselves into the playlist of nostalgic 90s R&B. I recommend lo fi hip hop on YouTube, video game instrumentals, classical music, or jazz instrumentals. Whatever gets you going just do it!

General ADHD tips:

•Rewrite lecture notes and type the lecture notes.

•Color code with bright colors and pretty drawings or calligraphy

•Instead of telling yourself “I need to take notes” which usually leads to procrastination say “Rewrite lecture notes and emphasize main points” ... this is useful in your to do list but in everyday goals

•Generally try to get your assignments done ahead of time if there is structure to certain courses, if not, again, stick to the schedule. If you slip one day off your schedule then don’t beat yourself up. Breathe!!!

•Side effect of most ADHD meds is that you’re not hungry so buy easy things to eat like muscle milk or yogurt and granola or smoothies so you can sustain yourself

•Get a dry erase board to show what you need to do for the day and put it on the fridge with command strips

•To avoid forgetting things, put them at a table near the door where you leave your apartment/dorm/house.

•Don’t overthink the time it takes to get ready, often that’s why ADHDers are late. Better to be super early than late though - have a routine set so you know how long each task takes - for example “I know a shower takes me 15 mins, washing my face takes 60 seconds and a few more including sunscreen/moisturizer, etc...”

•In that same grain, set timers for going to the bathroom, showering, etc just in case you one day hyperfocus and push yourself too far

•Open the blinds!!!!

•Clean your room and tidy up your space. A cluttered space impacts your mental health in a really negative way. Your space reflects your mental state at times as well, so check in with yourself. Have a specific day where you know you’re going to clean, but ADHD sometimes gives us bursts of cleaning so take advantage of that as well.

•Anytime your water bottle empties refill it. Have your water bottle or mason jar next to your workspace, and drink 5-10 gulps. Seriously. ADHD depends a lot on hydration, especially if you are on medicine which naturally dehydrates you. If you do not stay hydrated, you’ll get that massive headache mid day and crash sooner. A lot of times, lack of productivity can be due to not drinking enough water.

•If you don’t take medication, then sometimes you may notice you love coffee, and that’s because it’s a stimulant. Too much of anything is not good, but balance it with water. If you’re going to use coffee to kinda “medicate” then do it close to when you’re going to be productive.

•Setting yourself up to do a task rather than envisioning the overwhelming act of doing the entire action. “Okay, lets just get up and get the first step down, such as opening the laptop or wetting the toothbrush.” Baby steps.

•Take advantage of accommodations! Your college more than likely has an Office of Disability Services. Also, email your professors...they’re actually just as stressed as you about classes being online.

•Remember that you’re already trying as hard as you can, so don’t listen to the narrative of “try harder”, “you’re *r word*”, “you’re cheating by using medication”, “just do it,” “it’s easy,” “what’s so hard about it?” or “you’re lazy”. Anyone telling you that, even yourself, is wrong. And DO NOT allow anyone to be ableist, even yourself.

•Validate yourself. Don’t let anyone to do the “I experience that too”/“I know what you mean”/“we ALL have trouble with this!” and they don’t have ADHD. No. It’s our experience, it’s valid, and unlike anything on the planet. If you’re reading this and you don’t have ADHD - no, you do not experience any of the things in my next bullet point.

•Don’t be hard on yourself if you stumble along the way getting this right. ADHD completely changes your executive functioning.

We see the task, but our brain blocks it.

We have something marked down as “important” but our brain tosses it out in the “trash”.

We watch an entire episode of a show, but our brain ignored the entire thing. Our brain picks and chooses what is stimulating, our brain changes our interests.

We have sensory overload, we have no dopamine, we have bursts of curiosity that cannot be contained (often inconvenient) and if interrupted, our brains cannot take it.

People often discount how many things ADHD actually changes because it’s widely misunderstood. I want to take the time to acknowledge that ADHD, formerly known as simply ADD, has different types: primarily inattentive, primarily hyperactive-impulsive, or combined which is what I have. So it’s not “hyper” and “relatable”. It is also not a buzzword to use to describe things. I must put stereotypes and misrepresentations of ADHD to rest.

It impacts us emotionally as well, which most people don’t know... such as rejection dysphoria — extreme sensitivity to being criticized to where our brains self destruct. Our brains don’t regulate emotions well.

ADHDers - do not fall victim to how everyone else operates and call yourself a failure. We have to work twice as hard and the results actually come out brilliant especially with our determination and imaginative ideas that are also seen in autistic individuals, honorable mention!

There’s good days and bad days. There’s literal changes in thinking that other people do not experience. We all collectively know wouldn’t be who we are without ADHD, but we all recognize the challenges. However, it makes me happy to see messages like this so that I can make a difference and hopefully help one person with ADHD, especially of color, at a time stop being so hard on themselves. 💗

[actualbird]

not tot related just me getting VERY anxious so it's not too important so i can actually use a read more haha: is anybody else like me irt needing at LEAST five things to be happening at once for like, productivity to happen?

back in january, no joke, i was once sewing an entire dress while transcribing a 2hour zoom call (freelance work) WHILE writing fanfiction. and i got all those things done when they needed to be done. but that was me unemployed. things r different when employed, yea?

in my last job (which is very very very corporate and also sucked) i had a hard time for a lot of reasons but one of them is bc i had to be doing one thing at a time, on the job. theres no space for me to open a new tab for something interesting, every task took up so much space for that. not only did that make me sad as fuck, it also just did NOT activate my brain. brain was like, "the activity quota hasnt been reached, we dont turn on yet!!" and im pointing at the task like BUT I HAVE TO DO THIS and brain is like "tough luck, scrub!!!" i was working so slowly and so badly lmao.

current job is a lot more flexible tho in like, every way. flexi hours as long as i timekeep everything right but bros, i have a timekeep topic thats labeled "personal development" which is basically "theres nothing for me to do" and when i checked my prev salary, those hours were still included in my work hours. what? anyway, a bunch of coworkers have shared that they sometimes play video games or the like while working, bc of focus issues like me. and so i feel p safe doing the same shit, i get all my work tasks done alongside writing thousands of words of tot fandom bullshit and doing tot dailies and petting luke plush.

i cannot stress enough that being able to do this allows me to work better. my writing for both work and fandom bullshit is just....much more lively. and the amount of shit i write for both work and fandom daily? you dont wanna know. it's a LOT. and i work faster too!! i have to overtime every once in a while in this job, but it's more often i find myself with personal development time because i managed to finish so much ahead of time. and most of the time i feel GOOD. most of the time this FEELS GREAT. i feel energized and happy with the stuff im making

but now im getting worried (typical) that maybe im just being lazy????

like idk, i believe in "work smart, not hard" and "work with your brain quirks, not against them" but WHAT IF I COULD BE DOING THINGS IN A MORE STREAMLINED EFFECTIVE PRODUCTIVELY BETTER QUALITY MANNER????

im game to give up feeling "good" if it means i can write faster and better. i have not been diagnosed with ADHD but i have a...suspicion? but idk if it's ADHD or just another facet of bipolar disorder, which i am diagnosed with.

oh god, one huge con of my workstyle is that it is messy. i get everything done but sometimes people need to yank me back and ask me where a certain thing is because it slipped through the cracks and i forgot about it and oh god. im not feeling very okay anymore but mY POINT MY POINT IS!!

PPL WITH SIMILAR OR DIFFERENT BRAINS, DO U HAVE THOUGHTS??? am i fucking insane? do i need to things better? should i eat soil? why did god make me like this?

i wrote this post with 3 devices open