#it's honestly somewhat relieving to finally be able to point at a probable cause for all my symptoms

[sup3r-n0vaa]

life update: i am connecting the dots. it’s all coming together. my brain is huge. i see patterns everywhere. i am a genius.

but it would seem that the picture that is being painted is that i am most likely disabled. yippee.

[shotorozu]

TITLE : hospital stay

PAIRING : bakugou katsuki x reader

SYNOPSIS : you’re in the hospital on your boyfriend’s birthday, and bakugou seems to have no issue with spending it in there.

WARNING(S) : MHA MANGA SPOILERS ‼️ (recent arc)

legend : [Y/N = your name] they/them pronouns used, a quirk similar to the avatar but that’s about it.

note(s) : so, it’s bakugou’s birthday. and i had this idea since march 20 😦 so i’ve been waiting for his birthday to come for literally a month but i didn’t want to post this way too early. alsooo i don’t know if this arc happened near spring but lets pretend it did for the sake of the story

When you woke up, the fluorescent lights were the first to hit your face

Following by the incoming beeping of a monitor, and the sudden throbbing of your head, the dryness of your throat evident.

Blinking slowly (or trying to, your other eye being a bit delayed.) you try recalling what just happened. You’re in a hospital, that’s one thing you know, but the specifics are still unknown to you.

Right. You remember now, you were fighting along side your classmates, and you managed to get blasted away when you thought that shielding Bakugou Katsuki would work. Yeah, you were sure that you were going to get an earful from him, if he—

You jolt when you notice said blond standing right next to your bed, vermillion eyes staring deep into your own, and somewhat— you could feel the weight and intensity in the stare

“S-since when did you get here?” You’re startled, and your voice is hoarse. Bakugou doesn’t formulate a response, and chooses to avoid the question as a whole.

“Finally you’re up.” He rolls his eyes. He looks much better than you remembered, despite having a few bandages on his forehead— he looked well. “It’s been 5 fucking days.”

“Five days?” You question out loud, your sense of time all disorganized. You clench your hand, just to see if your quirk was still working. Seeing air, fire, water, and just.. something, would relieve your worries— but a look from the blond shot you down quickly. You decided that it was wise if you didn’t try.

The blond seems to be done with the conversation, since he immediately walks out of the room. Actually, why was he here? You’d expect him to be laying down in bed, but despite being hit with that beam, he was walking around like everything was fine.

He comes back with a few other nurses, and they’re relieved to see that you’re awake— and even though they’ve bombarded you with questions with how you felt, you couldn’t brush off the feeling of a pair of ruby eyes on you.

Just, glaring. It’s nothing abnormal.

When the nurses finally leave you alone, giving you details of a few injuries— like your injured— well, burned eyelid that honestly stung (it came from the fire aspect of your quirk) you would’ve expected to be alone in your hospital room for the rest of your time there but Bakugou stayed.

“You’re going to tell me why you jumped in front of me?”

You were expecting to be questioned by him, after all— what you did didn’t exactly shield him, since he was also pierced. You didn’t expect the interrogation to be happening this soon

“Actually, don’t answer that. I don’t want to fucking know.” And he suddenly changes his mind, just like that.

You would’ve said impulse as an answer, but you doubt that he would’ve taken that seriously. And besides, you were kind of glad he changed midway that he didn’t want your answer. Your voice feels parched, despite chugging down a glass of water earlier.

“Did you check up on Deku?” You cringe when you hear cracks in your voice, and the dryness is unbearable to your throat, but he nods. “Idiot’s knocked out cold.”

He doesn’t mention the fact that you were one of the last few people that were still rendered unconscious.

“Your throat sounds like the sahara desert. Do me a favor and drink up.”

You blink owlishly at the glass of water that was set on the mini table, and when you drink up— it actually does something to relieve (temporarily) the dryness.

It was a consequence of your quirk after all, using your quirk too much would cause your body to feel sore, and everywhere to feel dry, and he knew that.

Bakugou was acting uncharacteristically, and you just don’t know why. Maybe it’s not so uncharacteristic of him, since he’s been less of an asshole as of recently, but you know that he would probably deviate from the question if you asked, so the both of you sat in silence.

—

It’s the next day, the same as yesterday— except it looked like dawn when you woke up. Bakugou also appeared at the side of your bed once again, almost as if he was there for quite some time.

“Nice to see you too,” You think to yourself, and you’re glad you didn’t actually say that out loud. You try to stand up straight, but Bakugou’s quick to push your back against the pillows.

“Don’t sit up, that’s idiotic.”

“Right, sorry. How did you get here? Isn’t it too early?” The parched throat came back. Though the ‘magical’ baku-water helped, it’s effects were only temporarily, sadly.

“You call 7am early?” Right, because for him— 7am isn’t that early, you even remember seeing him up at 6 sometimes.

“Actually, wait.” You blink, trying to recall what day it was, and what month it was. You recalled it being spring but.. was it March? or was it April already?

“What.. day is it today?”

It was almost like he was hesitant to say, “..April 20.”

“What the— April 20?” You’re appalled, because the last time you remembered, it wasn’t anywhere near April 20, but maybe it’s your 5 day unconsciousness to be blamed. “Isn’t it your birthday?”

“Shut up,” He mumbles, and he shifts around the room in search of something, but it’s too dim to be able to tell.

“Medicine. The nurses said you should take it now.”

You don’t reply.

“It’s for your Sahara desert throat. The other things are for your fucked up eye and injuries.”

That seems to be enough to convince you to take the medicine, and despite wanting to run away screaming from the bitterness, you take the medicine— not wanting to be met with any consequences

“Why are you spending your birthday here?”

“Do idiots like you ask that many questions?” He shoots back, and you’re unfazed by the fact that he just called you an idiot. You wouldn’t blame him.

“No but.. you seem fine.”

“A few days ago I was not, but now I am because I took medicine.” He walks over to untwist a few medicine caps, it appears to be for your eye.

“So, Does my eye look fine?” You bat your eyelashes just to mess with him, and he flicks your forehead with an ointment cap “No.”

“Sorry, sorry,” You laugh, choosing to completely ignore the sudden sharp pain when you laugh.

He bends down to reach eyelevel, “Can you see?”

“Sorta.” Your eye has this thin blur filter to it, that can’t be good— can it? Going blind in one eye, and having to wear an eye patch.

It was almost on cue, because Bakugou says “You’ll be rocking the pirate look if you don’t take your medicine,” Instead of handing the medicine for you to apply, he quickly applies a decent amount around your eyes— not giving you a warning whatsoever.

You wince slightly, but you’re glad it’s over. But why is he playing nurse with you? And why was he brushing off the fact that it’s literally his birthday.

—

Through out the entire day, Bakugou continued to act as if he had some responsibility over you. From helping you put on your medicine, to just monitoring you with eyes of a hawk. The fact that he chose to ignore all your protests was just a part of him.

His behavior was also very.. interesting. It would swing from being his usual self, to being this eerily quiet and calm Bakugou. You would’ve guessed that you were having a fever dream, if it weren’t for the fact that he wore his usual scowl on his face.

What remained consistent, despite it all— was that he stayed. He ate lunch in your room. He only left when the doctors and nurses asked him too, but that was only temporary. He stayed with you the entire day, even when the clock stroke 5pm.

But it’s quite literally his birthday? Why would he spend it in a hospital room with some extra? Or idiot? Let alone, why would he take care of said idiot/extra on his birthday? You don’t know because he refuses to tell you on why he spent it here.

“Did you at least get some cake or something?” You ask for the umpteenth time, Bakugou’s paced back and forth for some medicine bottles and bottles of water, and you could tell that he was scowling, despite the fact that he was facing the other direction, “Why the hell would I want cake? You’ve been asking weird shit all day.”

“Because it’s your birthday? Seriously— have you been brainwashed into thinking that it’s not your birthday?”

“What— fuck no. I haven’t been brainwashed.” He turns over to you, “I know today is my birthday.”

“Okay, so you know. Why aren’t you celebrating then? Did people forget? Or am I finally going insane?”

Bakugou chooses to stay silent. He stands up, and walks over to you— everytime he moves closer, you could feel your heart pound, luckily not at a dangerous rate.

“Birthday, birthday, birthday” He grumbles, quiet, but loud enough for you to hear. “That’s all you’ve been talking about. As if like you weren’t the one in the hospital bed as we speak.”

“Okay, is it wrong to remember your birthday?”

“Shut up, I didn’t say that.” He gets closer once again, almost to the point that your faces weren’t that far away.

“You’ve just been so concerned about my damn birthday, that you haven’t even taken a good look at yourself,” He gestures at you, by looking you up and down

You finally take observation of all of the gauzes, the IV tubes, and bandages, his words forcing you to look at what was reality.

“I don’t know why you did what you did, jumping in front of me like some kind of heroic bastard, it’s dumb. For all I know, I should be screaming at you, and wishing you the worst for that.” He clenches his fist when he recalls, the scene replaying in his head

“But what I am saying is that, you can give me a gift if you’re so fucking concerned about my birthday. It’s the least you can do.” His statement is solid enough for you to take him seriously. You wouldn’t have if he was scowling, but it’s quite.. different. An expression you’ve seen all day, but seeing it up close is a different story.

“And that would be..?” You gulp, anticipation bubbles

And just like that, he presses his lips against yours, the warmth of his lips sending shocks of warmth all around your body— the impact was abrupt, but the kiss as a whole was surprisingly gentle

Yet, it was also similar to his quirk, it sparked up spurs of need and sent goosebumps all over your body.

You place a hand on his shoulder, the tubes around your arms making it too difficult to wrap your arms around him as you deepened the kiss, Bakugou’s touch is cautious when he lays his hand on a spot that was the least affected, aware of your injuries. Pushing the small of your back with his hand quite gently, he kisses you like it’ll be the very last— even though you both know it won’t be.

When you both pull back, you’re taken aback— unable to think of coherent words, and a proper response.

But this damn bastard, he smirks at you knowing that he just sent shocks and explosions of intense feelings all around your body, your lips still tingling from the kiss.

“Wait, that’s unfair!”

“What?”

“I had no idea you even liked me!”

“For the fucking longest time I did, why the hell would I even be in some extras room, if I didn’t care about them?!” He tries not to yell too loudly but, the tone of his voice gets raised

You blink, “And you preferred playing nurse with your crush this entire time, instead of spending it properly like well.. everyone else?”

“Who the hell said— Fucking hell, do I have to kiss you again for you to understand?”

“Enlighten me,” Your mouth quirks up into a smile, which ultimately causes his cheeks to be set ablaze.

“Playing fucking nurse with you isn’t horrible. It’s one way to spend my birthday, even when you give me shit about it” His brows press together, trying to drown out his flustered expressions with a scowl, “There’ll be more birthdays to come, so why would I be ‘wasting’ it here? There, that’s it. You happy now?”

Silence.

“..More than happy. But don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone about your thing for playing nur—”

“Don’t you fucking finish that thought,” He says stern. “I’m going to get the nurses to check on you, and then— I’ll go home and come back again, tomorrow.”

He storms off, and when the blond is sure that he’s not in your line of vision anymore— he slumps against the wall

“Fucking hell, they’re driving me crazy.” He mumbles, recalling what he had pulled off earlier.

»»————-　♡　————-««

likes and reblogs are appreciated, thanks for reading!

i do not own bnha/mha and it’s characters. boku no hero academia/my hero academia belongs to horikoshi kohei, i only own the writing and i do not profit off of my hobby

do not plagiarize, reupload, translate, or use my works for audio readings without permission

[lexpressobean]

I've been thinking about these 3 alot...

... and how much they seem to really respect Shino. I know it's a filler, but, like... Why does it seem like Shino has a knack for finding children who have wondered off away from school? Like, he's just taking a walk, making his way around the village or surrounding forest, and then there they are. Kids playing hooky or some shit. And Shino just takes it upon himself to approach them and steer them back to where they should be, while getting them attached to him somehow in the process??

But honestly. If this was just one of many times this had happened, I'd say Shino does this not out of his knack for teaching or having a way with kids. Rather, he developed a way with kids and easily applies that to his teaching because he has a strong desire to simply protect children. And it's not even from some paternal instinct as much as survival, because I think it stems from the developing trauma of losing Torune to Danzo. And I don't think it's all subconscious either.

Like I know the novel and anime frames his desicion to teach as a sort of a new goal in life as the war has ended for a couple years already and a noticable Peace has been achieved by the Blank Period and well... He's an Aburame.

Like, the Aburame are literal living, breathing, walking bioweapons. With no fight to utilize that, what else is there? Well, much like the Nara have the Nara forest and Pharmacology specifically, The Aburame most likely have a historical stake in the area of Konoha, perhaps it was simply in their Ancestral Home. Idk, but they're here to stay, they ain't budging. They're Clan Culture is very Martial and I'd argue Spartan in nature, but otherwise, they do other things too. I think they'd do well as major players in the conservation and research of native species of animals and plants, but definitely insects too. I bet they play a huge part in the general area's ecosystem, especially due to the fact that the Kamizuru clan attacked with a whole clan's worth of non-native Hymenoptera that could very well have become and still are an irritatingly and consistent problem as invasive species tend to be. And as a far as goods go, why not put some of them to use and handle an apiary? Honey is a great good to sell. All of this is great as a clan that no longer needs to fight. But, what about individual members in general, and so Shino?

Well Shino is the Heir of this clan. This Noble Clan. This "ready to throw hands at any moment" clan. It's future is in his hands, so to speak. So I doubt Shino would completely sever his connection to Shinobi life all together. And so, teaching at the Academy would be a great way to keep that connection. Teachers have to know their stuff, after all.

But what if in order to ensure teaching was his calling, Shino did his absolute best to make Jounin ASAP so he could take on a Genin Team. And. And by chance, it ended up being these three?? And they are absolutely STOKED!!! And they also pass Shino's genin test, which... would probably be a feat in it's own right. But they already know Shino, and Shino has bestowed upon them some wisdom they actually took to heart! Yeah, well, in reality they might be just a tad too old to be Shino's first official genin squad, but they were still his squad one point in a sense, right?

Kon Nohara, Tano Ikemoto, and Aoki Kobayashi

I even gave them names help Imagine these three are already chuunin at least and decide they want to pay Shino a visit and even volunteer to help Shino during class time on a collective day off because they admire him so much (T~T)

But even then if not these three kiddos, maybe these three li'l shits lol

Even in times of Peace, Shino's special set of skills seem too useful to waste, and being a Jounin teacher would definitely have been a way he could still go on missions, but also definitely commit to becoming a Sensei at the academy once he was 100% sure and got older. Kurenai became a Jounin/Genin Squad Leader in her late twenties, but in comparison I see Shino doing that more mid-20s. (He needs some time to travel and find his big bug friend and generally live a little?)

Kurenai was a Genjutsu Specialist who manned a Tracker/Sensing based team. This sounds like it was a highly beneficial combination, even if she ended up being somewhat sadistic lol. Asuma was bound to Team 10 by Tradition as InoShikaCho and Sarutobi have that Pact together. Kakashi's team was literally Cherry Picked for him specifically by the 3rd Hokage. And Gai, a Taijutsu Specialist, had a team that Specialized in Taijutsu and Physical Offense.

Of all four teams, Kurenai and Gai were very suited to their teams, Gai in a complimentary way and Kurenai in a Challenging way. In that same vein, I think Shino would imitate Gai. Shino as a Shinobi himself has a general set of skills, but the way he goes about them are very niche. But, he was always very stealthy, and could sneak up on nearly anyone. Gags aside, he could go unnoticed as long as he wanted too, and by the time he was noticed or was ready to attack, he has you quite literally surrounded. Honestly I can see why Search and Destroy would be an Aburame's forte, but when there's no need, a person with a personal skill of high quality stealth could probably man a team with an emphasis on Reconnaissance and/or Surveillance, even Bodyguarding. I feel like Shino would probably put an emphasis on Stealth and Tracking too, utilizing his insects as sort of assistants that keep tabs on his students (Stealth Test) as well as to encourage just enough fear during too much down time in his students to inspire quality training opportunities, so maybe Kurenai rubbed off on Shino more than they all realized haha

(Plus I'm sure his students would be be smart and thoughtful enough to eventually understand what Shino and his bugs are: a complete unit. They realize just how strong and dedicated Sensei really is to be the way he is, and they all learn more in depth about Kikaichu and it's like WOW SENSEI YOU REALLY ARE RISKING BEING EATEN ALIVE EVERY SINGLE DAY, AREN'T YOU? But he's still here, because THAT'S how strong he's become over the years and the confidence to manipulate the Kikaichu while having to think of current chakra level, the most efficient use at any given time, how many he actually needs, how long usage will last, ect. They are high maintenance, man!)

Shino would no doubt produce highly skilled Bodyguards and Masters of Stealth. Maybe the type that would end up being in high demand for the eventual Celebrities that start to pop up as times change, but still very much needed when it comes to Criminal Activity, like in Sora-Ku?

But as time passes and he decided to teach at the Academy, he'd feel very at ease to do so. He'd be happy to be put in charge of all these children, because he would be able to help teach them things they need to know to defend themselves and others in a world where adults like Danzo had and will continue to exist. Maybe while he's at it, he'd use his stance as a Noble Clan Heir and accomplished Shinobi to push for changes in government with Sai's help and with Naruto and Shikamaru's cooperation? Like, the truth does come out, everyone on the Council were actually horrible and had too much power. So HERE are some ideas and REASONS why these ideas should be implemented because Shino's not going to let his brother's life and death be in vain!? HELL no, we WILL make some changes around here. Shino sees his students and just wants a future where no kid ever has to live in fear of being completely taken advantage of by the very system that was supposed to keep them safe and they pledged allegiance to.

I cannot help but think of the quiet but absolute fear little Shino was harboring for the years to come after Torune was taken by that strange man and Father Shibi didn't even attempt to stop him. His own father didn't dare beat the shit out of this strange man who came looking for him, and the only solution for Shino to stay was for Torune to make himself look more desirable as an asset and be taken instead. I bet there was a lot of misplaced resentment there for a while, and talks that just didn't happen. Maybe a classmate doesn't show up to class one day and Shino is IMMEDIATELY stressed out and just... takes it upon himself to look for them after class. And he's relieved when he see they're simply at home with a fever. Shit like that just fucks with Shino, because theres people taking kids and no one is doing anything about it?? And then as Shino grew older he realized exactly what happened and how slimy the machine of Konoha really is and it was never completely Shibi's fault that Torune had to leave. He grows mentally at a faster rate than most of his classmates, and knows more than a kid really needs to know.

Shino doesn't want that for any other child. Shino is the kind of person who hears kids screaming outside of his house and he can't tell if they're playing or being murdered and it's stressful to the point he'll check through his window and he sees them for himself. He get stressed out seeing a kid in public unattended and WANTS to approach them to help if need be but also maybe he's overthinking it and the parents are there somewhere and he'd just end up looking suspicious. Like, that's what I kind of figure for Shino. He's so hyperaware of the power dynamic between kids and adults and seeing a kid so ready to fall victim to that makes Shino feel ill the more he thinks of what could happen. And he wonders if watching the kid in the market until they finally reunite with their parent so he could move on with the rest of his day causes him even a fraction of the the utterly disgusting flurry of nerves and fear that Shibi must have felt all those years ago. It goes along with his desire to spare every single little insect's life he can. It goes a long with the fact he only gets violent unless absolutely necessary. Like he wants to be strong but he doesn't want to go mad with power either, less he becomes the very thing that hurt him and his family in the first place.

Originally Shino wanted to become strong to be able to defend himself because at a very young age adults failed him and Torune. But then that changes to defend not only himself, but others as he grows on a team, and realizes trust is important. And then he figured if there must be adults out there that would hurt a child, it's only logical that he should become one that would only nurture and teach one to be strong as well.

Anyway, yeah. Had some feelings. Thanks for coming to my TED talk.

[animeyanderelover]

Hey uhh I really liked the Killua with ADHD s/o so... Ciel, Levi, Hange, Shaiapouf and Meruem, with ADHD reader (in the form of headcanons) .. also take your time :)

Wow, not gonna lie. I was already happy when I finally got to write something about the Chimera Ants already once. But to be able to write about a few of them again. I apologize if I didn’t get something accurate.

Tw: Yandere themes, unhealthy mindset, unhealthy relationship, obsessiveness, possessiveness, threatening, degrading, delusions, ADHD, violence, brutal behavior, killing

ADHD: ADHD stands for attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, a complex brain disorder. ADHD is a development impairment of the brain’s executive functions. It causes trouble with impulse-control, focusing and organization.

s/o has ADHD

Ciel Phantomhive

☕️Ciel isn't the best nor is he the worst to have with his darling having ADHD. He doesn't hate you for it, he knows you can't do anything against it since it's not your fault. You were just born with it and there's nothing you could have done. So he does try to be as understanding and patient with you as possible. But keep in mind that Ciel can get rather easily annoyed if his buttons are pushed the right way. So I feel like if he realizes that he's near his limit, he would somewhat push you away and let Sebastian or the other servants deal with you. This might hurt your feelings, but Ciel is actually frightened that he'll say something hurtful to you and for that leaves you. Would later on apologize and try to make it up to you. He himself isn't very familiar with ADHD, but is a smart boy and has his demon butler with him.

☕If you should tend to lose motivation and focus quickly, lose your things and don't seem to listen too someone when being talked to then you actually don't have to worry too much. Because Sebastian and the servants will do anything for you, meaning you don't have to worry about being forced to do cores. You losing things can of course annoy Ciel, especially if they were expensive or he needed them himself. Luckily his butler finds them always quickly. He would grow definitely a lot more controlling over his s/o because they keep forgetting things, leading him to scheduling out their whole day from the moment they wake up to the moment they go back to bed. Ciel also tries to not make you focus on something too long since you lose quickly interest. It's agitating in a way for him since he hates it when he gets the feeling that you don't pay attention to him, but he reminds himself that you can't do anything against it.

☕If you should be the more hyperactive one, Ciel will definitely have to leave you very often alone. Ciel isn't good with very energetic and loud people since he's constantly surrounded by such persons. He really does extend his string of patience a lot with you, but he feels kind of insulted whenever you suddenly blurt in when he's talking. Also nearly goes crazy whenever you can't sit still for a minute somewhere, tapping your feet and playing with your fingers. Your hyperactivity exhausts him and the only reason he puts up with it without lashing out on you is because you can't do anything against it and because he loves you. Hates leaving you alone because he's afraid that you'll climb up somewhere or touch some weapons or things which might hurt you. So whilst it makes him tick off, he will have you stick near him very often and if he needs to calm down, he'll order Sebastian to watch over you since that guy's the most capable of handling you.

☕Reputation is important for Ciel and as arrogant this may sound, feel like he wouldn't tell many people about you since he doesn't want to be judged for being in love with someone many nobles would describe as 'unsuitable'. He can gladly pass on the whole 'You-could-have-chosen-better' talk. A less selfish reason is that he is due to the way you are incredibly overprotective of you. Next to being a bit embarassed, he understands that you would probably not want to hear others talking trash about you. He lives in a very difficult time where people were more judging than they might be today. This openmindness wasn't as present as today and behavior was especially under people from higher society very important. Ciel knows that and it leads him to shielding you from the outside world.

☕I feel like the people in the manor are all really open-minded and would accept you open-heartedly which will lift a bit weight from Ciel's shoulders. Sebastian has infinite patience and Bardroy, Tanaka, Mey-Rin and Finny just really like his darling. It gives Ciel the feeling that he can trust and rely on them and whilst he definitely keeps a sharp eye on the human servants since they tend to be more clumsy which might end in an accident. After Sebastian Tanaka might be the most trusted, that is if he is in his real form. This gives Ciel a sense of ease because when he hurt you unintended, he knows he can count on them to be there for you and comfort you. Mey-Rin, Finny, Bardroy and Tanaka will over time grow just as their master overprotective over you.

Shaiapouf

🎻Here we have to keep in mind that Shaiapouf changed his type and behavior for his darling. I think during the first time when he was a stricter Yandere, he had a harder time dealing with this. Because back then it was all about perfection for Shaiapouf and this was somewhat of a flaw his darling had. After reading a whole day books about it, he did get that his s/o didn't choose to be this way, but it led him to being a bit harsh on them neverthless. When he reached the point of total adoration and devotion, that changed of course and all of a sudden, his view on all of this changed. It wasn't any longer a flaw, it was a unique trait his royalty had and Shaiapouf swore to himself to treat them like a loyal servant should.

🎻During the first stage he definitely tended to be very controlling, probably even forcing you into doing things even when you lost focus and/or motivation. At that time Shaiapouf just had very high expectations for you and you just happened to go against his perfect and ideal picture he had in mind. He forced you to educate yourself better, he forced you into learning the violin or another instrument, all because this perfect image of you was stuck in his head. And he scolded you every time he noticed that you stopped doing it once again. It was definitely not an easy time. So when he entered his worshipper mode it is most likely a huge relief for his darling. Because now he doesn't care about all of this anymore, the only thing he is focused on is protecting his king/queen and keep them happy. Now he doesn't lash out when you lose your things or seem to not listen to him. He's past total devotion and infatuation and due to his never-ending amount of patience with you a lot easier to be with. You don't have to move a finger anymore because he insists on doing anything for you now.

🎻The stricter version of him also wouldn't tolerate it if you should be too energetic, keep interrupting him or can't sit still without somehow move your limps or even do indecent things. He always tries to keep in mind that it's somewhat of a sickness, but for him it was then all about manners and good behavior and so he did try to forcefully change your way of being, always scolding you and trying to teach you how to act properly. For a worshipper Shaiapouf this is a no-go and even thinking back on how he even dared to think that he had the authority to try to change his already and always perfect majesty has him devastatedly sobbing. HOW DARE HE?! Now he honestly doesn't care anymore when you interrupt him, constantly act energetic or even scream at him in excitement. He's obsessive and due to that tends to focus really intensely on your behavior, he's beyond relieved that he didn't damage you with his previous way of acting. His majesty shouldn't change because of him. The only thing that makes him badly paranoid is when you act a bit too reckless which might end with you getting hurt. This makes Shaiapouf always fly panicked to you, preventing you from doing whatever you were about to do and try to coax you into doing something where he knows you won't get hurt.

🎻He used to somewhat degrade you and make you feel bad about yourself before too, inveighing constantly that you should and could do better if you would just try a bit harder. It has him going on a crying rampage later on because even thinking about how he used to say those words at you and not caring when you looked hurt at him inflicts an unbelievable amount of pain onto him. If he should ever even think that you still resent him for it, you have him kneeling in front of you whilst sobbing and begging for forgiveness even though he knows he doesn't deserve it. That's the exact reason he is even more anxious of ever letting you under humans again. He's frightened that they will not only kill you, but also talk down to you because of your ADHD. It gives him nasty heart attacks all the time and if he should ever find out that there was someone in your old hometown that bullied you because of this, he will remove named disgrace shortly after because it makes him absolutely furious when he hears that someone didn't respects and worships you the way he does. Blames also himself for not making you feel worthy enough if you yourself should think lowly of yourself.

🎻You all can probably guess it, but after becoming a worshipper, it will become a lot more easier for the s/o to endure life a bit better with Shaiapouf because now he doesn't see their ADHD as a flaw anymore, but as a special trait that has to be adored and protected. He will do now about anything and everything for you. Shaiapouf is in this case even more dependent on your approval because he's horrified of how unworthy he used to treat you and misreads things constantly, instantly blaming it on how he used to be. It can be as much as you reacting a bit too late to him because you weren't focused and then you already have him crying. He's still a lot to deal with, but it's better for your mental health to not be discriminated for your ADHD anymore and being told that you could do better.

Meruem

👑Just like Pouf, he had a change in his overall behavior which needs to be looked over. Let's just say that at first he was totally terrifying with dealing and accepting it. Different from Pouf he's the type to blame you for this even if you really couldn't do anything about it. It's a dangerous gamble in here because he used to expect total obedience and behavior from you and annoying him or going against his wishes ended with him hurting and scaring you on a daily base. After he had his transformation to a slightly better Yandere, he became totally fascinated with this, suddenly being interested a lot more about ADHD and informing himself properly.

👑It won't go well if you don't stay focused whilst he is doing something with you or he gets the impression that you don't listen when he's talking to you. It ends with him talking terribly down to you, pocking cruel fun at you for being so stubborn, dumb and weak and can even end with him hurting you physically when he's had enough. Later on he would be still somewhat grumpy and annoyed whenever you forget things or lose focus and don't listen to him. But now he came to the terms of accepting that this isn't your fault to start with and for that won't lash out on you anymore. He just checks on you and makes sure that you don't forget to look after your own health.

👑Being loud and interrupting others because you can't wait for your turn might be even worse than being unfocused and forgetful in here. Meruem is a king, you have to treat him like one and obey him. And being all impatient, not letting him finish his sentences and even yelling at him is such a huge sign of disrespect that Meruem used to think that you are either out of your mind or have a death wish. It ended so often with you crying afterwards, either because he had terrorized you or really hurt you. That changed of course later on, he still was somewhat annoyed by all of this, but now he just tends to clamp a hand over your mouth when he realizes that you're about to suddenly start speaking again. He doesn't like being interrupted. He proves to have more tolerance with you constantly being hyped up and even expects his royal guards, execept Pouf, to be ready to troll around with you when you seem too energetic. Since he knows that you can be very careless, he never lets you leave his sight, especially when his butterfly servant or another chimera ant is around.

👑He honestly used to be the worst when it came to talking bad to you and about you. He called you weak, pathetic, useless and many other things. He just thought that you should be grateful for him to even keep you since you were a sore for his eyes to see. But he also saw himself at that time as the only one who was allowed to talk like this, ending in him killing everyone who did the same. He owned you and only he had the right to do this to you. That changed after he softened up. Now he kills everyone who talks bad about you because he cares and I believe Shaiapouf might just really get himself killed because he simply does not see you as a worthy partner for his king.

👑Neferpitou and Youpi adore you and whilst Meruem is on alert whenever they are near you, it's nothing compared to hen Pouf is with you in the room. Meruem will never, NEVER, trust this guy when he's near you. The only person he really trusts you around is Komugi, since he cares about her as well and since Komugi never judges you to begin with. He feels sorry if he should have left any sort of trauma on you because he used to try to really break you so you would finally behave. That makes him really careful when he's now acting around you because he's somewhat worried he'll break you if he isn't gentle enough with you.

Hanji/Hange Zoë

🔬Hanji is someone who doesn't care about this at all. They're incredibly open-minded with everything and tend to be very special and peculiar in their own sense. Similar to their fascination with Titans, they will suddenly become to an unhealthy extent curious about ADHD, staying up nights to read books and maybe even ask people who know someone who has this disorder. It adds oddly up to their obsession they have with you and whenever you do something that is connected to this, they get scarily interested about it. Their interest about ADHD would go because of their darling from zero to thousand in only a short amount of time.

🔬Hange doesn't mind it that much if you don't really pay attention to things even though it can be a bit embarassing from time to time since they tend to start rambling exitedly about things only to realize a lot more later that you stopped listening ages ago. But Hange isn't someone who gets discouraged very easily and won't blame you for it. They are very lenient when it comes to you forgetting things, since they are a bit like you in that matter, even though they only forget things which aren't important for them. Also shows a lot of tolerance when you keep forgetting to do your cores or just lose motivation in it. They are also on the messier and forgetful side when it comes to taking care of themself. But what counts for them, doesn't count for you so the moment they thing you start lacking to look after your own health or the conditions you live in because of your laziness become too extreme, they will step in and help you with cleaning up. Whilst trying to keep you as motivated for as long as possible, they won't be angry or disappointed if they have to do it alone because you lost motivation.

🔬If you should show symptoms of hyperactivity and too much enthusiasm and excitement, you're a match made in heaven for Hanji, even though Levi tends to call you two a match made in hell because now he has to endure two of you. But honestly, Hanji shows a lot of similarities in this case. They can be really thrilled and driven by an invisible motor as well, not to mention that if they're too excited about something, they tend to cut people off before they finished speaking as well. But they do know when to stay quiet or become more serious whilst you don't, but it isn't like Hanji gets ever annoyed or angry with you. They find it even quite endearing since you remind them so much of themself. For the most part they will let you be, even though definitely stopping you when realizing that you're about to get too reckless. I can see them as even being the type of person who will be all excited with you together and do stupid things together. Not only because they just really enjoy being silly together, but also to look after you.

🔬They're not surprisingly very much angered whenever someone makes a wrong comment about their darling's way of acting around. Hange knows that people tend to get annoyed with heir darling and even see them as a nuisance. And that makes them mad. They really have no tolerance for such people who think they can judge someone without even knowing how they feel. And it's their darling we're talking about after all which makes them even more furious. Even Levi has to be a bit more careful. Hange definitely shows a lot more patience with him, Erwin and people they're close too, but even here they can become eerily quiet the moment someone says something too extreme or they notice that you're hurt. Whilst not caring what other people, except their darling, think about them, they care very much when it comes to whether people think bad about their s/o or not. Especially if you should feel insecure they would be a lot more on alert.

🔬Hanji's acceptance is a good thing to have since they don't judge you or get annoyed with you being like you are. They want you to be yourself after all. They don't baby you like many others, but it does lead to them becoming a bit more clingy, especially if you're the hyperactive type. If you don't live together with them, they always pop up very often to check if they have to help you a bit or not. Also has this odd quirk of making notes about your behavior because at this point it's safe to say that they reached the point of unhealthy obsessiveness, everything you do is being absobered by them. It's a bit unhinging to witness, but it makes it easier for Hanji to deal with your behavior even better since they know at some point what to expect and how to counter if it might endanger you. One thing, you're not going to be scout under any means because Hanji totally fears that either you'll lose focus or get too overxcited, and not in a good way.

Levi Ackerman

⚔️At the beginning it might be a bit more hard for Levi to adjust to all of this. Given the fact that he's obsessive and collects rapidly informations about you, he'll find out about this very early on, talking to neighbours, your friends and other people you're familiar with. And of course he'll start informing himself about all of this, but he has just a short string of patience and is easy to annoy. He knows he really can't let his ire out on you since you can't do anything about it, but sometimes your behavior just really tugs on his nerves since he isn't the best with people who are either unfocused or too active for their own good. So similar to Ciel at the beginning he might distance himself out of fear to say something too harsh to you. He doesn't want to scare you.

⚔️Levi would step in a lot into your private life if you should keep forgetting to clean up a lot and lose daily things. Neglecting hygiene, tidiness and maybe even your own health is such a huge red cross for him. He would be definitely a lot more controlling than usual and come over everyday to check on you and the condition your house is in. And if he thinks it isn't cleaned up? Guess who's staying for a bit longer to wash and scrub, doing your laundry and organizing your things? He might even try due to that to speed things up to get you to move in with him quicker so he can really make sure that you will never forget about such important things again. I can funnily see him as someone who won't be as mad as some people might think he would be. He's of course pissed that you either forget to look after the house and you or just lack motivation, but it gets attenuated due to him knowing that you don't do it because you're really lazy or because you aren't interested in it. He will still try to push you into at least helping a bit, but he can and will play the role of the housewife. Prefers it maybe even that way since he gets things done like he wants too.

⚔️With a more pumped up darling he will have troubles at first. It isn't like he isn't used to such people, he knows quite a few of those. But with his s/o this is just a bit of a different story since he really tries to avoid being harsh or mean to them which he would have been normally with those kind of persons. He might seek some advice from Hange since he knows that he is not the best when it comes to being patient. He might even let you spend time with them when he gets a bit overwhelmed with your energy since despite being annoyed with them most of the time, Levi trusts them. He would be gone for a bit to collect his thoughts before coming back with his emotions having calmed down. Will with time however learn how to deal with you being all bubbly and hyped. But he also will definitely watch over you more carefully since due to your too active personality you tend to do things that might be dangerous. It's one of the reasons he often gets mad at Hanji when he has to leave you alone. They are willing to do such things with you which triggers his overprotective side a lot.

⚔️Disrespectful brats aren't tolerated from him in all scenarios. But when it comes to disrespecting his darling, his reaction is definitely the most intense one. Whilst Levi admits that he himself struggles sometimes and finds himself annoyed by this, he would never insult you on purpose and if he does he apologizes later on. There's of course a difference between just pointing something out or really being mean with the intention to be. Levi can tell which is which and will act accordingly. He doesn't say anything if someone just points something out with the intention of wanting to be friendly since he's like this as well. But if someone insults you or pokes fun at you that's a different story in which Levi will shove someone's face into the dirt with demanding an apology. Would be a bit nagging when you seem to get discouraged very easily, complaining that you're too sensitive, but would still be in the end always comfort you when you're down.

⚔️Will literally not let you do anything dangerous since he's worried you'll lose focus and hurt yourself because you aren't careful enough. If you should even mention that you want to be a scout or anything like this, you'll have him instantly being over you and ordering you to stop thinking such a ridiculous thing. Levi tends to overthink everything a bit due to you having ADHD. Hange is probably the person he's the most calm around when with you since he knows that they are the last person who would judge you and from all persons he knows, he just has the most trust in them even though he tends to give them a rather long and harsh lecture whenever they tried something stupid with you.

[kimistorm]

[Lee Minho] Cats are the Worst

Fandom: Stray Kids

Pairing: Lee Know/Lee Minho x GN! reader

Requested by: AvatarKyarra

Prompts: 6) “That wasn’t supposed to happen” and 9) “Don’t freak out”

Word count: 1.7k

TW: Mentions of food

AN: Lol <1k was a bit of a lie apparently. Anywho, thank you for the request! Sorry if the writing feels a little clunky/repetitive TwT BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY, Hyunjin is back!!

“I don’t know, do you think he’ll like it?” you asked your phone that was on speakerphone as you scrolled through the list of recipes on your screen.

You heard an exasperated sigh from the other end of the line, “of course he’s going to love it. You’re his significant other.”

“Yeah, but he’s not that fond of sweets,” you bit your lip and ran a hand through your hair in frustration.

Han let out another groan from your hesitance, at this point, he was probably more frustrated than you, “have you seen him with Felix makes brownies?”

“Okay, but Felix’s brownies can make anyone melt.” You bit back in response as you thought to the cheery blond’s sweets. They always made you feel better, even after a rough day.

“He’s going to love anything you make him,” Han told you with finality, though this would be the fifth time he’s told you this. “But the more time you waste doing this the less time you have to make it.”

You snorted, knowing Han also had streaks of indecisiveness, “when did you become decisive?”

“Since you spent nearly an hour going in circles with me.” You let out a yelp of surprise, not realizing how much time had already passed. “Just make cookies! They’re going to be faster than a cake.” Your black-haired friend quickly told you, hoping to take this opportunity to give you a decision.

“Okay, okay, thank you!” you hurriedly clicked on the recipe with the highest rating and number of reviews.

“It’ll be amazing!” Han rushed to tell you as you fumbled with your phone to hang up.

“Thanks Han! If we have any extra I’ll bring you some!”

“Go, go go!” Han cheered before hanging up. With a determined nod, you ran around your shared kitchen for the ingredients. You frowned when you couldn’t find any more chocolate chips, Minho must’ve eaten them because you could’ve sworn you had some last week. It looks like you’ll have to change your plan and make sugar cookies. You found a simple recipe that allowed for decorating and decided that you’d decorate them. That’d be a cute gesture, right?

With clumsy precision, you measured out the ingredients and mixed them together to form the dough. You frowned as the recipe called to chill the dough for a couple of hours. You weren’t going to have time for that, so you’d have to skip that step and hope things still turned out all right. With the use of a couple of spoons and a butterknife, you were able to scoop out some relatively flat cookies onto the baking tray and pop them into the oven. It was a shame you couldn’t find the cat-shaped cookie cutters that you thought Felix gave you for Christmas, but they were very lost. Now that you think about it, you weren’t sure if you saw them since the day he gave them to you.

It was with a sinking heart when you realized you would have to wait for the cookies to cool before you could ice them. “It’ll be okay, right?” you worriedly mumbled as you glanced at your phone to see how much longer you had until Minho came home and the timer telling you that it would be close. Letting out a somewhat panicked but quiet, “aaaaaa,” you set to cleaning up the bowls and utensils you had used to make the dough. In no time they were on the drying rack and you grabbed a smaller bowl to make the icing.

You fished through to the back of your pantry for the somewhat old bag of powdered sugar that you used to decorate pancakes with and then never used again. You were glad to see it was still powdery and usable. You were measuring out the powder for the icing when a light body made its way to your side.

“Hey Doongie,” you cooed as you pet the cat who leaped onto the counter for some affection. “We’re going to make your dad cookies, what do you think?” dark eyes blinked at you lazily. “Ah, maybe that’s what I get for trying to talk to cats.” You sniggered when you got no response. You turned around to check the next steps of the recipe, but quickly spun around in fear when you heard the hollow ‘thunk’ of something plastic falling to the ground and an indignant ‘meow.’

“Oh no!” you panicked when you saw Doongie sitting cleanly on the counter where you left the white cat, but there was no bowl of powdered sugar. That was spilled on the ground. “Why’d you do that?” you wailed at the cat who you swore was smirking at you. You grew even more scared when you saw the disturbed flour on the ground. It was thrown all over the place and you saw pawprints leading out from the mess. “You didn’t!” you scolded as you followed the trail of white pawprints, already fearing for the mess that was being tracked all over your apartment.

Thanks to the visible trail, you were able to find the victim hidden in one of the cat houses perched on a scratching post. “You wanna come out?” you cooed to the cat enshrouded in darkness. You needed to see the damage that was done. Two eyes seemed to stare back at you from the darkness, blinking only once. You let out a sigh before returning to the kitchen to grab a cat treat. Doongie meowed pleadingly with you, going as far as to put a paw on your arm when you fished out a treat, “no.” You told the cat sassily, “you’ve caused enough trouble.” You swore Doongie rolled their eyes at you as you walked away.

“Come on out,” you gently cooed as you waved the treat in front of the opening to the cat housing. There was a moment of silence, and then a head popped out. You quickly moved your hand away so the cat would have to reach, and gasped when you saw the white cat who emerged. “Oh no Dori!” the normally striped gray cat was almost completely coated in powdered sugar. “On second thought,” you put the treat back into the housing, “you can stay in there.” You were not looking forward to washing the dark cat.

You left the cat to the darkness of the cat house and the treat before returning to the kitchen, letting out another wail when you saw Doongie playing around in the pile of sugar. “No! Bad cat!” you weren’t keen on another set of sugar tracks around the apartment so you slowly came closer to pick up Doongie. The white cat froze and stared at you, nimbly jumping out of the way when you lunged forward to pick them up. “No! Come back here!” you raced around the apartment chasing the white cat.

After a few seconds of chasing them, you decided to give up, hoping Doongie would calm down and sit instead of running around the entire apartment to cause an even bigger mess. You quickly closed the door to the bathroom where the cat was currently taking refuge and closed all the doors to the rooms. Hopefully this would keep the damage contained. With a sigh you set to cleaning up the powdered sugar that had splattered to the ground and somehow onto the cabinet right next to it.

You heard the deadbolt click and your heart sank as the door opened to reveal Minho, “hey,” while you were sad your cookies weren’t ready in time, seeing him always put a smile on your face and you got up from the ground to greet him, “you’re home early.”

“They let me leave earlier,” he smiled as the two of you quickly kissed. There was a meow and he looked down in confusion at the half-white half-gray Dori.

“Dori?” he kneeled down and rubbed the cat lovingly, “what happened?” he asked as he turned his attention to you.

“Don’t freak out.”

His dark eyes widened, “that’s not reassuring at all.”

“I was trying to bake you cookies, and then Doongie knocked the sugar bowl onto Dori.” Minho let out a quiet yelp and began inspecting Dori for any wounds. “Sorry.” You muttered shamefully, you were just trying to celebrate.

“Don’t worry about it,” Minho smiled as he pulled you into a hug, “that’s so sweet you tried to make something for me.”

“I guess I made something.” You muttered bitterly into his shirt, “a mess.”

“It’s the thought that counts,” he told you gently, “they’re self-cleaning,” he gestured toward Dori, “it’ll be fine. Probably.” You giggled at his last comment, relieved to find he wasn’t mad. He was an angel, if your positions were switched, you definitely wouldn’t be as cool-headed as he was right now. “Is something burning?” Minho asked after a moment and you let out a scream, running over to the oven and completely deflating when you saw the blackened cookies.

Minho aided you in opening the window and airing out the open oven so the fire alarm wouldn’t go off, “that wasn’t supposed to happen.” You mumbled sullenly as you took out the cookie sheet and cautiously broke one of them, causing it to completely shatter and reveal how deep the black reached. “I kind of don’t want to scrape off the burnt parts to get to the good stuff.

Minho peered over your shoulder and popped one of the broken pieces into his mouth. His eyes watered at the hot treat and he frantically waved a hand over his open mouth to try and cool it down. “Yeah, it’s kind of bad.” He answered honestly as he engulfed you in a back hug, “and it burned half of my taste buds before I even tasted it.” You deflated at his blunt comment, “don’t worry! Let’s go buy some cookies at the bakery down the street!”

“But I wanted to make you something to celebrate,” you pouted, looking sadly at the blackened sweets.

“Just being with you is enough,” he smiled into your neck.

You hummed and leaned into his touch, “you’re too nice.”

“Come on,” he gently tugged at you, “let’s clean up the cats and get some cookies.”

“I love you,” you told him softly as you gave him a kiss.

“Love you too.”

Masterlist

[bill-y]

INURE

Peeta Mellark x male reader

[ We all know who Katniss Everdeen is, but what if Primrose hadn’t been chosen but another boy from another unfortunate family? YOUR family. ]

Info: This is basically a reader insert and I’ve changed a few rules, not ground breaking though. The reader is a bit bland for now but I plan for his actions to be different. Because he has different moral grounds from Katniss and such. Would appreciate feedback! FEEL FREE TO POINT OUT TYPOS. GRAMMARLY SOMETIMES DOESN’T DO MY DYSLEXIC ASS JUSTICE

Part five: Click here, butters, elpacho, last meheecan.

Part six: You're here, dumb!

Part seven: Finally here!

Wattpad account: L0calxDumbass

Peeta and I end up helping Haymitch to his compartment, the reek of vomit and alcohol wasn't exactly pleasant.  Since we couldn't set him down the bed, we ended up hauling him to the bathtub, setting the shower on him. 

Peeta gave me an odd look when I laughed awhile ago; there was no humour in the situation after all. Forming a good impression wasn't really on my agenda. "It's alright; I can take it from here," he said.

I nodded, "Okay," I nodded, putting my lips together. "Do you—need me to call those Capitol people?" I asked, stumbling over my words. My confidence seemed to have been drained at some point.

He shook his head "No, I don't want them," he responded. I nod for the last time and head to my own room, relieved that I don't have to wash putrid vomit off Haymitch's chest hair, or something. Though it would be the perfect "revenge" for the people working here, I get why he doesn't want to see them. 

I wonder, why does he want to help such a wreck? Was he simply kind like the time he gave me bread? Or was he using this to gain Haymitch's favour? A feeling of nervousness bubbled up within me, a kind Peeta Mellark was way more dangerous than an unkind one. Not everyone in the district can afford to be kind, so kind people make such a mark on me.

I looked at the packet of cookies at the table beside the fancy bed—a lump formed in my throat. Kindness would've been nice, but not in this situation. I sighed, taking my attention to the window instead. 

There stood a lonely yellow flower, a dandelion. It took me back to the schoolyard, all those years ago. My eyes had just left Peeta's bruised face when I saw that dandelion; hope rose within me that moment, I plucked it gently from the ground and hurried home. I grabbed a small, broken bucket and grabbed Nal's hand and headed to a meadow. It was filled with the same flowers.

It was the first moment where Nal smiled after our Father's death. He loved the way the flowers smelled and looked. However, he was quite upset because we had to eat them, with the rest of the bakery bread. My father loved his plants, maybe a bit too much. 

I remember countless hours we spent in the woods looking for a specific type of plant, whether for eating or for medicine. He had me memorize them by heart, which took a couple of years because I got distracted halfway through. 

The next day, we were off to school. I hung around the edge of the meadow after, contemplating whether I should jump the fence. My mother couldn't get a job, well, she didn't want to. She thought the whole District would shame her the moment she stepped out of our crumbling home. It made no sense to me; we had nothing to lose anymore.

Which is exactly why I went under the fence, retrieved the old, leather-bound daggers my father made from scraps and wood. It was pretty frail, but if you handle it carefully and throw it properly, it won't break—most of the time.

I didn't go beyond twenty yards that day; I didn't feel confident enough to go deeper, fearing I'd get lost in the forest. I took home a small rabbit that day, we hadn't had meat for months, so it honestly looked like a full course meal, like the one we were served in the tribute train.

My mother isn't the greatest cook, so she burnt a couple of bits, mainly the thighs. But it still filled us. The woods became my second home, escaping the sad atmosphere my mother gave off and the pressure the Peacekeepers would regularly make us feel. 

The hunting started slow, but each time I went under, I went deeper. I stole eggs from nests, jumped from tree to tree and managed to shoot a squirrel or two down. I struggled with the fish; my father would always throw his dagger to the fish with little to no effort. Whenever I'd throw mine, it would miss. It took me a couple of times to figure out the water distorts my vision.

The plants were no effort; I knew which one to pick, which ones were poisonous. The signs of danger used to terrify me back to the fence until I gathered enough courage to climb the tall trees, then I stuck with it, not liking the feeling of being chased. The wild dogs would always leave me alone after a while.

On July 15th, I finally signed up for the tesserae, carrying the first batch of grains and oils in the same broken bucket I used to gather those dandelions. I patched it up with some scrap bark. On the 15th of every month, I would put my name once again. I still had to hunt; grains weren't enough. We still needed soap, milk, thread and many more things we used to have. I began to trade in the hob, learning how to hold my tongue in the process. My father used to trade there as well; he used to do all the talking while I watched, stayed silent. 

And so I simply tossed the game I had to their tables. They caught on fairly quick; I'd only speak up when it came to bargaining or when I'd change what'd I'd buy. Or when I would insult wild dog soup. My father was a charismatic man, always able to persuade people to buy whatever. Not me, though, I was like a sore thumb. Painful, to talk to at least.

My mother wasn't very enthralled with the fact that I had been hunting, too much like my father, she said. That's when we argued, "Don't be stupid like your father!" she shouted. I remember my face contorting to anger, how my fists clenched as she continued to scream. 

I finally exploded, "Why don't you go out and get a job if you don't want me hunting, then? You'd rather we starve?!" I said, slamming the table. "I won't die, I won't end up like father! I won't be Capitol's pig, neither was he!" 

"But if you do die?" She argued back, tears flowing down her cheeks as she gripped both my shoulders. "I'm only thinking of you, Y/n!"

I scoffed, glaring at her, "If you're thinking of us so much, then why aren't you helping us?! If I don't die being accused of rebellion, then I'll die because of those stupid games because of you!"

"Don't blame me for this! It was your father's fault for being brash—" She reasoned, but I cut her off by pushing her off me. I stared at her as if she grew three heads. "They asked you," I whispered, "All you did was nod, you could've lied."

Her green eyes shook at my words, "Lie to the Peacekeepers? The Capitol? And get us killed as well?! I only what your father wanted," 

"They didn't have anything on father! It was your voice that gave it away! It's your fault that he's dead, now we're over here starving because you can't get over yourself—"

Then there was a sting on my cheek. She had slapped me. My eyes landed on a crying Kunal; guilt surged through me, so I ran. I ran to the woods and slept on top of a tree, humming a soft tune to the mockingjays next to me. They listened and sung back. I fell asleep to their lullaby, surprisingly, not falling off.

I found my hand on the same cheek my mother slapped that day. I was going to die the same way I said, how ironic. I won't be able to apologize or tell my mother I loved her anymore. A sigh left my lips as I continued to stare out the window. 

I clenched my fists, punching the wall as my breath hitched. I let out a groan, holding the stinging part of my hand. I glared at the wall, grumbling under my breath before I decided to fall asleep, not wanting to think of my regrets and what I could've done. As I closed my eyes, I only hoped my dreams would be pleasant. 

"Up! Up! Up! It's a big big day!"

Effie Trinket's voice awoke me from my dreamless slumber. I groaned, muttering profanities as she left my compartment. I tried to imagine what it was like in that stupid wig--- well--- head of hers, it made my head hurt.

I had fallen asleep in the green shirt, causing it to become wrinkled, the. Not that I cared, there will be some stylist stripping me anyways. I shuddered at the thought of Capitol people touching me, what a nightmare. My eyes landed on the packet of cookies on my bedside table. I decided to grab it.

I entered the dining compartment, still half-lidded and yawning. Effie Trinket brushes me with a cup of black coffee. She was muttering obscenities, probably because of Haymitch. Peeta held a roll, looking somewhat embarrassed  "Sit down! Sit down!" Haymitch said.

Peeta flashed me a smile, amused by how dishevelled I look. To be fair, I wasn't a morning person, I find waking up to be a tiring task. I rubbed my eyes, the packet of cookies still in my hands as I slid down the chair.

They served an enormous platter of food. I'd hate to admit it, but I was starving. So for the first time, I decided to stab it with the fork, not sure what to do with the cookies so I pocketed them. I figured I'd eat them much. . . much later.

I chewed slowly, glare on my face as my eyes struggled to remain open. I didn't even notice the orange juice next to me because of it. Peeta nudged me, handing me a cup of brown, rich liquid. It was quite warm. "They call it hot chocolate," he said. "It's quite good,"

My green eyes moved from him to the cup, then back to him. As if asking for permission. I sniffed, muttering a "thank you," before I took the cup from him. The moment the hot chocolate touched my lips I felt awake.

Not only was it hot, but it was also amazing. I've never tasted anything like this before. Coffee was a luxury, this I cannot even fathom. After I've drained my cup, I put it down and muster a sheepish smile. "Is there more?" I asked, my voice hoarse.

Effie seemed to be excited by my sudden interest. "Glad you're finally appreciating the finer things," she quipped as another cup was passed to me. "Right," I responded, gripping the cup tightly.

I stopped eating when I felt somewhat full, only asking for more hot chocolate. Peeta is still eating, breaking off bits of roll and dipping them in his hot chocolate.

Haymitch hasn’t paid much attention to his platter, but he’s knocking back a glass of red juice that he keeps thinning with a clear liquid from a bottle. Judging by the fumes, it’s some kind of spirit. I don’t know Haymitch, but I’ve seen him often enough in the Hob, tossing handfuls of money on the counter of the woman who sells white liquor. He’ll be a mess again by the time we reach the Capitol.

"So, you're supposed to give us advice," I said, taking a sip of the hot liquid. He grinned, "Here's some advice, stay alive," then he burst out laughing.

My brows furrowed, "Ha. Ha." I let out, unamused. I glanced to Peeta, surprised to see Hardness in his eyes. Usually, he looked mild. "That's very funny," he said as if adding to my remark. He suddenly lashed out at the glass in Haymitch's hands. It shattered, spilling the blood-red liquid on the floor. "Only not to us,"

Haymitch took this opportunity to punch Peeta straight in the jaw, knocking the boy out of his chair before turning around to reach for more spirits. I stopped him, driving a knife into the table, between his hand and the bottle, barely missing his fingers.

I expected some sort of retaliation, but that didn't come. "Oh, well what is this?" he said. "Did I actually get a pair of fighters this year?"

Peeta rose from the floor and scoops up a handful of ice from under the fruit tureen. He started to raise it to the red mark on his jaw.

"No," Haymitch stopped him. "Let the bruise show. The audience will think you’ve mixed it up with another tribute before you’ve even made it to the arena."

"That’s against the rules," said Peeta. "Only if they catch you. That bruise will say you fought, you weren’t caught, even better," said Haymitch. He turns to me. “Can you hit anything other than the table?"

I shrugged, pulling the knife off the table. "Your head or. . ." I said, before tossing the knife in between the seams of two panels. If I was confident at one thing, it's my aim. But not so much with a bow.

"Stand over here. Both of you," ordered Haymitch, nodding to the middle of the room. We obey and he circles us, prodding us like animals at times, checking our muscles, examining our faces. “Well, you’re not entirely hopeless. Seem fit. And once the stylists get hold of you, you’ll be attractive enough.”

Peeta and I don’t question this. The Hunger Games aren’t a beauty contest, but the best-looking tributes always seem to pull more sponsors. Though I do enjoy the fact that the stylists are likely going to have a hard time styling me.

"All right, I’ll make a deal with you. You don’t interfere with my drinking, and I’ll stay sober enough to help you," said Haymitch. "But you have to do everything I say,"

Of course, there's a catch. "Fine," Peeta said while I shrugged carelessly, sipping on my hot chocolate. "In a few minutes, we’ll be pulling into the station. You’ll be put in the hands of your stylists. You’re not going to like what they do to you. But no matter what it is, don’t resist," Instructed Haymitch

Oh, well there goes my plan on being a general nuisance. Damn you, Haymitch.

He takes the bottle of spirits from the table and leaves the car. As the door swings shut behind him, the car goes dark. There are still a few lights inside, but outside it’s as if night has fallen again. I realize we must be in the tunnel that runs up through the mountains into the Capitol. The mountains form a natural barrier between the Capitol and the eastern districts. It is almost impossible to enter from the east except through the tunnels. This geographical advantage was a major factor in the districts losing the war that led to my being a tribute today. Since the rebels had to scale the mountains made them easy targets for the Capitol's air forces.

Peeta and I stood in silence. My finger raised, mouth opening but I decided it wasn't worth it and awkwardly shuffled to one of the windows. He seemed to have caught on, however. "Nice view, isn't it?" he joked.

"I guess if you're blind," I answered dryly, raising the warm cup to my lips. "Sophisticated darkness, my favourite type," I finished.

He chuckled, walking next to me, the train slowing on cue. My muscles tensed as the sunlight entered the compartment. It was blinding. After my eyes adjusted I finally saw the Capitol.

I would be lying if I said it wasn't beautiful. Rainbow hued buildings that tower to the sky, possibly beyond. Shiny cars rolling on the fancy, clean pavement streets. The cameras failed to capture its beauty. It would've been perfect if not for the fact that the oddly dressed colours, wearing blizzard wigs and painted faces exist.

They looked painfully artificial. I much prefer the natural tones of district 12. "Eugh, how do they look at themselves?" I muttered, catching the attention of Peeta, who chuckled at my comment.

Huh, I forgot that he was there.

The same disgusting people began to point at us, enthralled. I was sickened, they couldn't wait to watch us kill each other like wild wolves. I suppose that's better than ending up at soup.

I stepped back, a scowl on my face. No longer able to stand the obnoxious attires and the mocking smiles of scums. Peeta held his ground, smiling and waving at them.

He only stopped when the train stopped at the station, blocking up from their view. "Who knows?" he said. "Some of them may be rich."

My body seemed to freeze as I took one last sip of the now-luke warm hot chocolate. That's when I realized, I had misjudged him. Not that I can read people well.

Which made sense, if I could I would've known that his father visiting me, offering to help Haymitch only to challenge him and now, waving and smiling at those slugs. He had a plan in mind.

He hasn't accepted his death yet. Peeta Mellark, the boy who gave me bread was fighting hard.

And that terrified me.

word count: 2.8k

Hey guys! sorry for the long wait! Had to take a break!

tags;

@nin3s

[ink-and-flame]

Kinktober - Intensity Undone

Kinktober Day 3 Prompts: No Prompts

Fandom: Original

Tags: exophilia, angst, hurt/no comfort, relationship arrangements

Pairing:  Orc(M)/Human(F)| Darnok/Lia,

[Authors Note: Since the plans for Darnok and Lia had changed this is completely off script now and no longer following the outline. The way the rest of this goes is going to be as much of a surprise to me as it will be for everyone else. There are only a few more parts of this left for what I am considering book 1 of this overarching story. This is a bridge story that does not fit anywhere in the Kinktober prompt list. I felt it worked better as a stand alone as opposed to trying to cram kink into it or having 2 separate stories be one. ]

Lia had been ignoring her phone and email for days now, as she knew it was Darnok trying to contact her. Double checking her messages to make sure she didn’t miss something important for work, she sent everything to voice mail and ignored the rest. That last moment in the club played over and over in her head. The look of shock in Darnok’s eyes as she mentioned his engagement. Everything after was a blur and she wasn’t sure how she made it home.

Ember had been checking up on her every day, letting Lia know that Darnok was sending her messages trying to get any information he could on Lia. It was bothersome but Lia understood. She didn’t give him a chance to say anything, but she couldn’t. If she had risked it, she might have simply fallen back into his arms with whatever excuse he could come up with. 

A part of her mind argued that she should have let him speak, should answer him, because what if she was wrong. Though that was the part of her that loved him and wanted to be with him. Lia didn’t trust herself, and whatever reason or excuse he had it wouldn’t be enough. At the end of the day she wanted more than what he was willing to offer, and she had to do what was best for herself.

The phone calls and messages continued into the next week, a few times it was Lucien or Zane calling to check on her, making sure she was ok. Thankfully they had managed to keep all of this from spreading outside their little group to avoid any drama or make things more difficult for Lia when she chose to come back to the club. Lucien had urged her, gently, to talk to Darnok and make a clean break if that was what she truly wanted. 

Thankfully for Lia he had no idea where she lived so he couldn’t just randomly show up at her home without notice. Though she wasn’t sure if he remembered where she worked and hoped that he didn’t show up and cause a scene. There was a small part of her that did want to talk to him and she considered what Lucien said as the days kept ticking by. 

Lia was in the back at work on her break when her coworker walked up to her with the strangest expression, she looked nervous.

“Uh, there is a car outside for you. A really expensive car and the driver said he was here to pick you up?”

Lia sighed and rubbed her face. “I’m sorry, I will go out there and tell them to leave.”

Lia only had a few minutes left of her break and didn’t want to waste it on this, but she had no choice. Walking outside she told the driver she was working and that he needed to leave. Regardless of his insistence that she get in. Turning around she headed back in and tried to ignore the situation. The car stayed right where it was for the rest of her shift and she was tempted to sneak out the back and drive home, but she didn’t want to risk being followed. 

“Ok, my shift is over, clearly you aren’t leaving and I am certain that if I try to drive myself home you will follow me. Right?”

“I have been given instructions to pick you up, and where to take you, that is the limit of my instructions. But yes, I would follow you.”

Rubbing her face with a sigh, Lia felt she had no choice. Giving a vague gesture of acquiescence she waited for the door to be opened and reluctantly got into the car. She knew this was Darnok and not some elaborate abduction, though it certainly felt like one. Of course it did not make her any less angry and Lia held that anger close to her chest, she would need it to keep from falling into his arms the moment she saw him. Despite everything, she missed Darnok.

When the car finally stopped Lia took a deep breath in and waited. The door opened and she stepped out. A wave of conflicting emotions washed over her. She was at the hotel her and Darnok would use on nights they stayed together after being at the club. She wasn’t sure how to feel about this choice, but it did make some measure of sense. 

The driver gave her  a key card and a slip of paper with instructions on it. Rolling her eyes she thanked the driver politely, none of this was really his fault, and headed into the hotel. Making her way past the desk and up to the room she was relieved to find that it was empty. It gave her a moment to prepare herself, take a few calming breaths, and sit down to relieve some tension. 

It wasn’t long before she heard another key card in the door and it opened. In walked Darnok, alone, and looking worried. Lia set her features as close to neutral as she could even though just the sight of him was enough to overwhelm her emotions. 

At first there was silence as Darnok stood somewhat awkwardly just inside the door. He stepped closer and cleared his throat. 

“Lia.”

Stopping him, Lia held up a hand. “Ms. Doran will be fine. If necessary I will allow you to call me by my full first name. Adalia. You have lost the privilege of calling me anything else.”

The startled look on his face followed by one of pain was all that kept Lia from breaking her facade. She did not feel anywhere near as confident as she sounded and knew that she would probably break before he did. 

“Of course Ms. Doran, I understand. Would it be ok if I sat at the table with you?”

Lia nodded and gestured to the chair furthest from her, waiting for Darnok to take a seat. She had not seen him in a bit, but he already looked different. It was hard to place exactly what was different, other than her perception of him, and perhaps that was all it was. 

“I know you are angry with me, upset, hurt, dozens of other things. I would just like an opportunity to explain everything to you. If you will allow it.”

Lia sighed and leveled him with an annoyed expression. “If at any point this starts to sound like excuses. I am shutting it down and leaving.”

“That is more than fair.” Darnok took a deep breath clasping his hands together on the table. 

“I should have told you of my arrangement the moment I started to consider you as my sub, that was entirely my own fault, I own all of that. All of this is my fault and I will never be able to apologize enough.” Dar held up a hand when he saw Lia open her mouth. “Please, just, let me get through this first part or I never will be able to. I will answer every question you have after.”

Lia nodded and gestured for him to continue. Though the word arrangement already had the wheels in her head turning and she was certain some of her initial suspicions about Darnok had actually been true. Maybe they wouldn’t be where they were if she had just asked questions the moment she became suspicious instead of holding it all inside out of fear of losing him.

“I am in an arranged marriage. It had been planned long before I met you, and I have spent much of my adult life trying to get out of it. Well, trying in ways that will not shame either family or get someone killed.” Clearing his throat again Darnok looked down at his hands. “It was obvious to my intended that I didn’t want this, and as a fae, she is indifferent to all of it herself. She does what her parents tell her and that is pretty much that. Though she did notice and eventually we sat down and had a discussion of what is and is not acceptable for our relationship and how we appear in public.” Dar paused and stood up. “I need a drink, do you want anything?”

“Water is fine.” Lia waited as he brought her water from the mini bar and a juice for himself. 

“Our agreement is that in public we appear a normal, happy, loving couple. Whatever it takes to convince the media, our peers, and our families that everything is working out. Privately I am allowed to indulge my sexual desires however I choose but there are rules I have to follow. I can’t be with anyone in our social circle, preferably I keep it out of the city entirely. I can’t fall in love or have feelings for my sexual partners. I cannot be seen publicly with them, and I can’t get anyone pregnant. There are a few smaller rules about visible markings and how I dress, but those are often overlooked.” Darnok took a swig of his juice before continuing.

“I did everything I could to stall the engagement or try to get out of it, but I can’t and my hand has been forced. Both families are pushing for us to be married by the end of next year.” He rubbed his face and looked sadly at Lia. “We have no love for each other, I honestly don’t even think she likes me. Our entire relationship is devoid of intimacy and even the barest shred of warmth. It is entirely a power move and my family was willing to sacrifice me as I am not the oldest son.” Pausing he shrugged. “You can ask questions now if you want. Or just leave, I honestly wouldn’t blame you. It is a fucked up situation that I made worse by not being honest with you.”

Lia sat for a moment, letting everything he said sink in. She toyed with the water bottle a bit as she thought of any questions she could ask. Really he laid it out pretty plainly. There wasn’t a whole lot of mystery, other than the whole arranged marriage part. She wasn’t even aware that was still a thing, but clearly it was. 

“I guess the only question I can think of is just why? Why weren’t you just honest with me from the beginning? It seems like such a simple thing, you could have brought it up that first night, or if not then, after the first month would have been appropriate.”

Darnok nodded, knowing Lia was absolutely right. He should have been honest from the very beginning. It could have avoided all of this. 

“It is a valid question and one I have no acceptable excuse for. The reason I didn’t in the beginning is because of privacy. I had gotten used to the arrangement and rarely had partners that I would do enough sessions with that it would be necessary to disclose it. After that though, I guess the reason was fear. I connected with you in ways I have never connected with anyone, I didn’t want to lose that. I kept telling myself you would move on, or I could just tell you the next month, but I always managed to find a reason to not say anything and it then became an issue of feeling too late.” Darnok looked down at his hands before continuing. “I guess part of me was living in this fantasy world where I could have both. I could keep the families happy, and I could have you which made me happy. I should have known it was impossible and I am so sorry for how much this hurt you.”

It was hard to stay in her seat, not run to him and throw her arms around him. She loved him, Lia knew that she loved him, but that love was poison to her heart. Even if he had been honest from the beginning, she knew she would have fallen in love with him anyway and it would have hurt just as much, but in a different way. 

“At least I understand now. I can’t say I envy your position, and you should be honest with your partners from day one going forward. Privacy or no, this is a cruel thing to do to a person and I would hate for it to happen to anyone else. I am fortunate I got my club membership on my own merits because I like the people I have met there and I don’t want to lose that too. I am sure we will see each other at the club, but I think it would be for the best if you kept your distance for now. Even though I understand your situation, I don’t think I can do any more scenes with you Darnok.”

Lia stood up. It was the most difficult thing she had ever done, but she had to let him go. Mostly for her own sake. He was never going to leave his fiance, he couldn’t, and she loved him too much to be his dirty secret. Maybe others could live with that, but she had grown far too attached and there was nothing to be done about it now. 

“So this is goodbye then?” Darnok asked, looking at her with sorrowful eyes. “You want a clean break, no friendship, no anything?”

“I can’t. I just, Darnok I can’t. Find someone else to be your sex toy. I am a sub, but I am still a person, and I refuse to let myself be used like that.” 

Turning away from him Lia headed towards the door, she could already feel the heat of the tears in her eyes threatening to fall and she did not want to cry again, not now. 

“Please wait!”

“NO! I am leaving and you are going to let me. This is on you. You broke everything Darnok, and you can’t fix this. There is nothing you can do to ever make this ok. Do not contact me again.”

Storming out of the room Lia all but ran to the elevator and stepped inside. She held it together long enough to make it down to the main floor and out the door. Of course she did not have her car, and while she did see the driver she avoided him and just began walking. The hotel wasn’t far from the club, she could see if Ember was there and get a ride back to work that way. As far as she was concerned Darnok no longer existed and she had to restart her life as best she could. 

Thankfully Ember was there, along with some of the others she knew. The walked helped to clear her head and kept her from looking overly disheveled as the tears had time to fall, but the cool air kept her face from going too red or splotchy. Ember called it a night early and headed out with Lia, driving her to her work and then following back to their building. 

Like a good friend Ember stayed with Lia all night, letting her friend rage and cry, doing whatever was needed to get it all out. It was necessary to heal, the wound had to be cleansed before the healing could begin. It was a shitty situation for certain, but Lia was strong and would eventually be able to move on. Until then, she had friends that would help her through all this. 

[thefanficmonster]

Kick Some Ghost Ass

”Until Dawn Gang x Reader (Gender Neutral)

Warnings: Swearing, Sex jokes (excuse my bad humor)

Genre: CRACK, Humor

Summary: It’s one thing when trouble finds this gang, but why don’t we take a look at what happens when they go actively looking for trouble. Needless to say, chaos ensues and no one is spared. Some are more affected than others, and some are dead-ass traumatized, but isn’t that just how life is in general?

Requested by my dearest ever - Until Dawn Anon. Hi lovely! I’ve missed writing your requests and I’m really happy to be back, creating another chaotic fic! I’m sorry it has taken me so long to post it but here it finally is - crazy as ever! I hope you enjoy it! Love you to Blackwood Pines and back baby ❤❤❤

I don’t know how I’ve found myself in this situation but I’m not complaining. If I get to do dumb crazy shenanigans with my crew, I’m ready for just about anything. Not to mention I’m no stranger to ghost hunting. I’m that kid that made DIY Ouija boards and took them to cemeteries with their terrified friends. You should’ve seen us leaving after capturing no ghostly activity - my friends relieved as fuck, and me pissed as fuck.

But today, I’m not expecting nor will I be accepting any disappointment. Especially not with Jess swearing on her Chanel purse that she wasn’t making things up when she said she had a haunted house she wanted us to visit. I must say, I appreciate this group’s enthusiasm when it comes to the paranormal. Never have I had someone who catches my vibe on the subject so well, let alone an entire gang all sharing the same opinion as me - that ghosts, demons and poltergeists are so fucking cool. Sure, Emily took a bit of convincing and Jess is not one to give a shit about the other world creatures invisible to the human eye, but something allegedly happened that changed her mind.

Her a-hundred-and-something-year-old great-grandmother passed away recently and though the death itself didn’t shake Jess up as much as it probably should’ve, the events that followed led to this moment right now - the eleven of us pooling out of two minivans that have pulled up to a terrifying looking house in a wooded are of the suburbs. Jess literally gathered us all on an ‘emergency meeting’ in the courtyard of our college just so she could explain the situation in detail - she doesn’t do well with explaining things in general, let alone when she’s hysterical - so we only understood what she was trying to say when she mentioned the word ‘ghost’. That’s when we all started listening more closely, with the exception of Emily, Beth and Sam but the latter two were intrigued despite trying yo hide it. You can only imagine how excited Josh, Chris and I were, Mike and Matt following a close second behind. Ash was a tiny bit more hesitant but Chris convinced her to give in. And just like that, a week later, here we are.

“I gotta ask, did your great-gran own a VHS player? Or a chest in the attic? Bonus points if there’s a creepy, child-sized doll in there.“ Josh asks as he yanks all the equipment he insisted we bring out of the trunk of the minivan.

“Quit fucking around, Josh! This is serious!“ Jess complains from the spot she’s standing in, shivering in the cold autumn breeze.

“Yeah, Josh! VHS players, creepy dolls, that’s all child’s play.“ I scold him as I pull on my jacket, wrapping it around me more tightly, “Shit gets serious when there’s a secret basement.“

“Y/N!“ Jess shrieks in exasperation. Honesty, how am I supposed to NOT bother her when doing the opposite is so much easier and brings more amusement? “You’re not helping!“

“Wasn’t trying to.“ I wink at her, driving her into a new level of fury that almost leads her to chuck her phone at me. If it weren’t such a prized possession of hers, I’m pretty sure she would’ve chucked it with the intention of knocking me dead. I’m lucky she has the aim of a drunk toddler that spun around fifteen times.

“Hey, quit pissing my girlfriend off, will ya?!“ Mike, who is basically halfway inside the trunk of the other van calls out to us.

I roll my eyes but choose to let it slide. However, someone else doesn’t. Emily does a dramatic turn on her heel, turning to face Mike, or at least the only part of him which is visible. You can imagine how hard it is arguing with an ass like THAT. I don’t know how Emily does it but oh well, I guess I do it too, in a way.

“So it’s girlfriend now, huh? No space between the words?“ Oh that smile she’s flashing him, it could make the Devil himself shiver. I find it kinda hot though - it means shit’s about to go down or hit the fan, either way, the rest of us will be entertained.

Mikey boy straightens up, gracing the rest of us by-standers with his dazzling features. Nah, I’m capping. I honestly think Mike is as attractive as I am patient - very little, almost not at all. It’s surprising how him and Jess are now apparently together since I always pegged her to be the superficial type.

“Got a problem with that, Em?“ He asks, eyebrow raising, head tilting to the side. Oh yeah, it’s on now. But, as someone who’s been quite excited to do some ghost hunting, and also as a representative of the peanut gallery formed of the rest of us who find it amusing and annoying, I feel the need to cut it short before it goes where it shouldn’t. I came to see some exorcist shit, not Keeping Up With The Bitter Exs.

“Jess, I sure hope your grandma is a blood-thirsty ghost cause I can think of at least two people I’d serve to her on a silver platter.“ I snatch the keys the blond has been jingling nervously between her fingers and jog up the stairs to the front door.

Ok I maybe overexaggerated the eeriness of the house. It sure wouldn’t sit right with you if you saw it around sunset or at night, especially not if it’s foggy, but a horror movie house it is most certainly isn’t. It’s pristine and well kept, not a single crack in the walls, the only reason it’s unsettling is because: 1) We’ve all seen a few too many horror movies; 2) There’s been reports of ‘ghostly activity’ - as far as Jess is to be trusted.

While I’m surfing through all the keys, checking each and every single one of them on the door because the real key is unmarked, I can’t help but overhear the conversation going on behind me on the porch.

“Can you believe we got all this in a single day and for a discount on top of all?! Whoever says Craigslist sucks isn’t doing it right.“ Chris’ enthusiasm over the deal him and Josh got on the ghost hunting equipment has been what’s keeping a wide grin on his face this whole time. Though I’m proud of my boys for not getting murdered by the Craigslist seller, I must say I hate that I lost the bet we had - I had to pay them each ten bucks if they didn’t get scammed/kidnapped/murdered and I’m now twenty bucks poorer. I’m not saying I value those twenty bucks more than my friends, though my broke ass needs all the bucks it has and all the dollar bills it could get, but Lord knows I hate losing.

“Yeah, and the guy was only mildly sketchy.“ Josh adds just as excitedly and proudly, “To be honest, Cochise and I were probably the scary looking ones in that parking lot.“

A look over my shoulder shows the twins, Sam, Matt and Ash giving the duo skeptical and somewhat disappointing looks and shakes of their heads. I’ll admit, the equipment is in very good condition and it’s the complete set for ghost-hunting, according to BuzzFeed at least. I’m impressed with the purchase - probably had something to do with how scary Chris and Josh actually look. The all-nighters we’ve all been pulling lately have taken a toll on them worst with the dark circles and bags under their hollow eyes, pale faces and brains turned to mush. I know I’d give them a discount to avoid them pulling out meat cleavers on me.

“That’s all fine and dandy guys, but do you know how to work any of this?“ Sam asks, hesitantly lifting the EMF reader and turning it in her hand, analyzing it with a curious gaze. 

Josh and Chris exchange a look before the former replies, “Just the cameras and voice recorder, the rest falls on them.” He points a finger at me and laughs, “Though they aren’t able to work something as simple as keys, they are more than qualified to be a ghostbuster.”

“You know, Josh, jokes on you, I can work keys! Jess, on the other hand, doesn’t seem to be able to work well with organizing things, hence my problem with these keys.“ I hurl the bunch of keys connected my a scarlet keychain at Josh, “Lemme demonstrate my true skills.“ I hop down the flight of stone stairs and approach the pile of equipment the guys have created smack-dab in the middle of the house’s driveway. 

“Oh, I gotta see this!” Mr. Ex-Class-President all but runs over, frowning when we all turn to look at him just as I pick up the spirit box to show off how it works, “Oh that’s what you meant. So you aren’t taking your clothes off?“

Jess and I are alike in one thing - the need we feel to chuck objects at people who piss us off. “You’re girlfriend is, like, right behind you, Munroe. Have some decency!”

“I was gonna enjoy a show as well, but I’m guessing we won’t be getting one.“ The girlfriend in question replies, looking at me quizzically as though that’s gonna convince me into discarding my outfit.

“No, unless you’re a ghost.“ I point the device I’m holding at Mike, “But if your boyfriend here keeps acting up I might turn him into one.“

“That sounds kinda kinky.“ Beth’s comment surprises me. The wink she sends me even more so. “And I kinda like it.“

Ok, ok, ok, hold on. 

Flirting with Munroe is one thing, but Beth is a completely different story. I can be threatening Mike with a knife one moment and cracking sex jokes with him over cold beer the next. While Beth actually has the ability to get me flustered and blushing, and my close relationship with her brother doesn’t help. Mother fucker can just whack me upside the head every time he catches me fussing over my silly crush on his sister.

“Ew, you too! Keep it in your pants or at least get a room.“ Emily doesn’t miss a beat when it comes to being herself. She’s truly a garbage bin full of treasure.

“We’d do the latter if SOMEONE could get the door open.” I glare daggers at Josh who is making hopeless attempts at what I was doing earlier - unlocking that damn door.

“I’d be more than happy to come through for you ladies.“ Mike says, getting in a stance of a runner before a race, his body directly opposite the door.

Oh I can’t wait to see where this is going. I SHOULD RECORD IT.

“Mike, it’s still breaking and entering and it’s still against the law even if the person’s dead.“ Sam points out, entering her mother-like mode, ruining the fun and causing me to pout at her. She gives me a look of disappointment - one worse than I’ve ever seen on my parents - so I just shut my trap before she can also express said disappointment through words and have me feeling guilty for the rest of the day.

A loud crash suddenly echoes causing us to turn our heads to look for the source of the terrifyingly startling sound. One glance is all it takes to put our minds at ease and a second one is enough to provoke different reactions in all of us - the broken window telling the story of where Josh has disappeared.

“What did I just say about breaking and entering?!“ Sam shouts after him while the vast majority of us are cracking up like hyaenas. Jess is just gaping at the broken window next to the front door in disbelief. She obviously can’t decide whether to join in on the fun or serve as back-up to Sam. Josh did technically damage private property that’s partially hers, but if you ask me it serves her right for not marking her keys.

“Sorry, I was too busy breaking the window to hear that part of the conversation!“ Josh’s apologetic smile appears on the other side of glassless frame. I can’t tell if he’s genuinely sorry or holding back laughter but either way, he looks innocent enough for Sam to let him off the hook as long as he doesn’t cause any more trouble - in which case: tough luck. Chris, Josh and I are nothing if not troublemakers, especially when we’re together. Chris tones it down when Ash’s around, and the same goes for Josh with Sam while I’m simply problematic regardless of who’s watching. My chaos is untamable, it’s a blessing and a curse and I love it, even though it’s landed me in hot water more than once. It’s nice to be around people on the same wavelength - chaos resides within this group and not a single one of us can hide it.

“At least we have a way in now.“ Ash offers Josh a helping hand in this argument after she recovers from the overwhelming fit of laughter. “I hope the broken window doesn’t anger your gran, Jess.“

The blond snaps out of her trance briefly, “No, she was a very sweet lady, but damn is Josh creative!” She hurries to correct herself, “Destructively creative.”

I hurry to correct her once again, “Chaotically creative.”

“Guys, do you mind coming in? It’s very creepy standing here alone!“ Josh calls out to us, looking over his shoulder at the interior of the house, “I’m expecting to be snatched and dragged to that secret basement we mentioned.“

“Mention it one more time and I swear to God-!“ Jess screams, fists tightened.

Before her angry wrath could crash atop us, we all make our way into the house through the broken window, carefully avoiding the shards of glass strewn about. One step inside and we’re met with the upmost of horror clichés - a drop in temperature. We’re all wearing thick hoodies because the weather outside is chilly in and of itself, but said hoodies aren’t as efficient at holding the house’s cold at bay and away from out skin.

Chris and Matt make their way in last, carrying the equipment consisting of three cameras, flashlights for everyone, an EMF reader, a spirit voice box, a voice recorder and a motion detector. I help them hand a light to each group member as well as a ghost-hunting device before we venture onward.

“If I were your grandma’s ghost, I’d be ten times more pissed about that window. It looks to me like that lady payed a lot of attention to keeping things in order.“ Matt comments while he examines the expensive looking painting hanging in the hallway.

I hear Emily scoff, “Unlike some.” but the remark is said so quickly and quietly I’m pretty sure I’m the only one who heard it.

Jess laughs, “She did like things in order, but she was never as strict as you might think. As I said, she was very sweet.“

“So do you just not take after her at all or were you adopted?“ Emily’s remarks are no longer a mumbled jumble of words, “No, nevermind, of course you’re not adopted. Your parents are smart people, they wouldn’t have chosen you if they had the chance.“

Jess laughs again, much more menacingly this time, causing me to exchange a look with Hannah who’s walking beside me. “Twenty bucks says one of them isn’t making it out of here.” It’s just a matter of time, to be honest. If not the lodge, or any party we’ve ever attended as a group, this haunted house is the perfect opportunity for a murder. We could even argue it was a ghost.

Luckily, the two cats clawing at each other’s throats don’t overhear, “No, my parents aren’t stupid, but your boyfriend clearly is. He chooses to date you! Or are you holding him captive or something.“

Ok that’s enough. I can tolerate a lot of things, but people calling one of my best friends stupid is not something I’m about to put up with, “How dare you call one of my hoes stupid?” I sneer at Jess, eyes narrowing.

“I thought I was your hoe too!“ She fights back, looking almost offended.

“Even more reason you shouldn’t have called him that! I don’t tolerate my hoes not respecting each other.“ 

I don’t get to see where this argument goes because Ashley’s shriek echoes throughout the hallway, stealing mine as well as the attention of everyone else. 

“There’s a ghost in here!“ Making it to the doorway of the room she’s in first, I peak my head inside and see the EMF reader she’s holding going nuts as if it’s detected something.

“Don’t worry, Ash, there’s a dead cactus here. That’s not the ghost we’re looking for, is it?“ Chris, my amazingly bright friend says, quirking an eyebrow suggesting that remark was nothing short of dead-ass serious.

“Chris, darling, that’s not how it works. Cactuses are plants.“ I point out as sweetly as I can as to mask my laughter.

“Don’t the same ghostly rules apply?“ The genuine look of confusion he gives me almost makes me lose it.

“Ok children, leave the room, we need to set up a motion detector to be sure.“ Beth says with a tone that suggests she’s more than over our insanity. Jeez, count on her and Sam to start parenting us through our chaos. They are of high authority, must admit - one genuinely feels bad if they don’t comply to whatever these two girls demand.

We all pile out in the hallway while the twins set up this interesting motion detector with green dots. I don’t know what Jess’ granny looked like, but I bet that even the most unattractive of people would look hella good with this lighting. Thankfully the room is dark enough with the shutters closed and the curtains drawn, allowing the dots to be perfectly visible.

We stare at the minimalistic room littered with fluorescent green dots on every surface for maybe a minute or two but not much happens to the disappointment to some and relief to others. However, as if not wanting to let us down, the ghost makes a shy appearance if the shift of the green dots is anything to go by.

“Oh shit, is that a ghost?“ Chris whispers, sounding as amazed as I feel in this moment.

“It better be.“ I mutter in response, refusing to blink and risk missing anything important.

The sudden presence of the obnoxious noise of the spirit voice box makes us all jump. As I turn my head to glare at whoever’s using it, Josh speaks up. “Are you an attractive ghost?”

“Josh, that’s my great-grandmother, you ass!“ Jess barks with disgust in her voice.

In the meantime, I catch glimpse of Mike rolling up his sleeves. Oh shit, this ain’t good.

“I’ve been waiting for this!“ He shouts victoriously, cracking his knuckles.

Knowing this won’t end well, the first thing I do is snatch the camera from Chris’ hands and turn it on.

“Um, Mike, what do you mean?“ Sam’s back to being concerned, turning to the rest of us when Mike doesn’t give her a response, “What’s he gonna do?“

“Fight it.“ I answer as though it’s the most normal thing to ever have been done, “Or, ash he calls it - kick some ghost ass.“

“A freaking ghost?! He’s gonna try to tussle with something he can’t see?“ I can’t tell if Matt’s tone is disbelief, amusement or disappointment, but I believe he isn’t about to try and stop or dear ex-president in his pursuit and that’s all that matters. I ain’t about to let someone stop whatever’s about to go down from going down.

“That’s still my great-grandmother, you dumbass!“ Jess shrieks with something alike terror.

“Don’t worry Jess, I’m sure she’ll go easy on him.“ I say in an attempt to reassure her but I can’t even be bothered really, I’m too laser-focused on the circus that’s about to take place in front of me.

Mike, as if encouraged by my words, charges into the room. Much to his dismay, before he could even reach the ghost, he’s met with a much more vigorous enemy - the carpet. The rascal trips him up and Mr. Munroe falls flat on his face.

The group stays silent, looking at the glorious aftermath of the glorious fall. Told ya these lights could make everything fabulous. Must say, it’s truly an honor for me to have been able to catch all that on tape.

“10/10, would ghost-hunt with Mikey Munroe again.“

[tiredcowpoke]

TITLE: Blank Spots [20] PAIRING: (Somewhat pre-established) Arthur Morgan/Fem!Reader, could be seen as an OC. REQUEST: Unprompted. BLURB: After waking up at the base of a steep incline and nearly freezing to death, you stumble upon a group of strangers who swear up and down that they know you. WARNINGS: Some creative license for amnesia. Violence, kidnapping.  NOTE: Chapter 20, damn. lol I’m not feeling 100% about this chapter but I wanted to get something out this weekend. Anyway, I hope you all enjoy.      TAG LIST: @on-my-way-to-erebor / @otherthingstoreid @ireallyhonestlydontcare @elanisha @darlingsdevil @cirillamylove @bunnyreese12 @rollyjogerjones @callmemythicalminx @r4reland @itsnothingwithoutchaos

You knew there was some conflict in you about how everything turned out, the hurt Arthur caused still lingering somewhat but you knew you had to take that as it were.

Yet, you felt good. It felt good to finally cross that point with him--again. Perhaps things weren’t the same as they were in your memory, how sure you were in your relationship with him. However, things weren’t the same since Blackwater. You knew that even when your memory had been worse than it was currently, struggling to remember names and faces, let alone whole relationships. A part of you felt like you may never fully remember your relationship with Arthur, but you felt like you had finally taken a step in the right direction with your relationship with him currently. 

Admittedly, it had been a little difficult to leave the small privacy of that beach where you had kissed him a couple days ago. To return to camp, to the dilemmas and course of normalcy you had found within. As normal as a group of outlaws could get, at least. For a while, you weren’t sure how Arthur wanted to approach this development, if it was worth telling people. You had realized that it would just be announcing what they already knew, but...well, maybe you were just overthinking that. 

Really, it seemed like Arthur just took it in stride. Too exhausted to make a thing out of it, or if there was a point to doing so. A part of you was relieved. 

Still, you did catch a couple eyes at the added bounce to your step, and the lingering touches when Arthur would seek you out as he was starting to move about on his own a little more frequently. He seemed to avoid outright public affection, something you had caught onto pretty quickly, but the two of you weren’t exactly hiding it. Still, nobody really felt the need to comment on it much outside of the odd question, which you found yourself not really minding. 

It felt like you were allowed to let it go where it may without getting caught up in old expectations. Though, you weren’t too sure on where Arthur’s head was at, but he didn’t seem overly disappointed over that. You’d just have to trust him to tell you if he had an issue with anything. 

Despite everything that happened to him, Arthur eventually seemed to return to his normal self after a while. A little thicker in beard and with a stiffer shoulder, but otherwise he seemed to have gathered himself back up after the whole ordeal with the O’Driscolls. You were greatly relieved at that, as much as you knew he would have to get back to gang business and what that entailed. 

So, you weren’t too surprised to find him approach you one late afternoon with news that he had business in town with Bill and some other gang members. 

“You sure you got the strength for whatever that will be?” you asked, Arthur rolling his previously injured shoulder somewhat. 

“‘Bout as much as I’ll need,” he replied, “Can’t stay here forever, I gotta get back to what needs doin’.” 

“I know,” you replied, giving him a small smile, “I just don’t want you hurting yourself again. I don’t think anybody can take you stuck in bed for another couple weeks.” 

“Myself included,” he returned with a small huff. 

As much as you had tried to cover it with a touch of humor, you really did worry he might injure himself again by getting back out there so soon. At all, really. You knew what type of life he led, what they all led, and the chance of a bullet to the skull was always high. You could remember the way Arthur had fallen off his horse that night, how he barely was able to move his legs to get to his cot. You had struggled with the feeling at the time, but you knew that regardless of how everything had developed after, you didn’t want to see him like that again. 

Yet...well, there was always a chance that you just might. 

“You’ll be safe?” you asked after a moment, glancing at him. Arthur shifted, glancing down for a moment before meeting your gaze. 

“Hate to be the one to say it, but I ain’t afforded that luxury. Not with this life.” 

He did have a point, as much as you didn’t like that answer. 

“Hey, I’m gonna be fine,” Arthur said after a moment, “Bill’s probably just got some lead, nothin’ too complicated.” 

“Because everything lately has been so easy…” you muttered, stepping into his side as Arthur reached out to wrap an arm around your shoulder, a small grin touching your face when you felt him press a kiss to the side of your head. 

“It’s gonna be fine.” 

“Alright,” you replied with a nod, letting out a small sigh as you wrapped an arm around his back somewhat, “You know what you’re doing. Just be careful--for my sake, if anything.” 

“I’ll try,” he replied, squeezing you to his side a little before releasing the embrace. You turned to face him once he had done so, watching as he seemed to glance off toward the horses for a moment before turning back toward you. 

“Been thinkin’ we should head out to get the last of that treasure map,” he said after a moment, pulling a small grin from you, “Get outta here for a bit.” 

“I’d like that,” you said with a nod, “Let all this play out first, though.” 

“Yeah…” he replied, giving you a small grin of his own as you squeezed his arm somewhat before he turned to head out toward the horses. 

You were worried, but you couldn’t fight the inevitable with Arthur turning his attention back to the gang. Perhaps it was a touch selfish, but you also knew everything that had happened had shaken you up some. Still, you were going to have to let that go. Some of it. You knew you had questions and a distrust of Micah that stemmed from what he did to you on that mountain and now what happened with Arthur. 

That was a touch subject to approach, yet one you knew you would have to mention to Arthur eventually. It was just...hard to talk about. There was Micah himself, but even the memory of it filled you with such dread and fear. 

Still, it couldn’t continue to go unsaid. 

“Glad to see that fight you two was havin’ is cleared up,” a familiar voice from behind you said, turning to glance over your shoulder to see Abigail standing there. 

She stood there with a cup of coffee, giving you a small smile as you let out a small huff. 

“Yeah, and then some,” you replied as she walked up to stand beside you as she finished off her beverage. 

“If only I could get John to see some damn sense. Ain’t from lack of tryin’,” she said around a sigh, you giving her a small nod. 

It wasn’t the same screaming matches you heard from Dutch and Molly, and lord had those only gotten worse, but you knew Abigail and John had their moments in camp. Really, when you saw Abigail storming out from that tent they shared, you knew to give her some space. Still, you weren’t witness to the specifics of their relationship--well, if you had, it didn’t matter with your memory now. 

“Grimshaw’s sayin’ Pearson needs a hand with dinner,” Abigail said after a moment, “Figure two hands might get us eatin’ all the quicker.” 

Honestly, that didn’t sound too bad. You would need the distraction. You followed her out toward the food wagon once she had gotten her fill of the moment she had walked in on between you and Arthur. Still, even with the chopping of the vegetables and meat, you still couldn’t really shake this feeling that lingered at your back. You just...well, you were worried. That was what it was, and you were sure you would end up feeling foolish for it when they all returned back to camp. 

Thankfully, your partial absentmindedness didn’t cost you a finger or injury. Though, you were pulled from your thoughts when you felt Abigail touch your shoulder, a look of mild irritation crossing her expression. 

“Think I can wrap up the rest,” she said, “Think you can Jack for me? I think he’s playin’ in the woods near the edge of the river. Maybe the boy’ll listen to you quicker while I finish here.” 

You let out a soft chuckle, passing her the last of the food you had to chop up. “We’ll see, but sure.” 

Rinsing your hands in one of the washbasins nearby, you headed out toward the mouth of the river near the path leading out of camp. You didn’t see any sign of him from where you stood--he wasn’t tossing rocks into the water or drawing in the dirt with a stick like he usually was. You could feel a small twist to your gut, hoping that he was just in the tree line and you wouldn’t have to wander off to find him. 

You dropped down onto the bank, following it along until you were able to step up and into the trees. You paused for a moment, listening for anything before walking further in. 

“Jack?” you called out, pausing in your walk, “Your mama’s looking for you!” 

Silence. More twisting in your gut. You really hoped he was just playing a game not wandered off or…

You moved with more purpose into the trees, calling his name once more before you heard some movement nearby. However, as you did so, you heard a muffled cry that sounded from very close nearby. Yet, as you turned to look in that direction, something very solid and hard jabbed into the centre of your back. The pain radiated up your spine, settling hard in your kidneys as you felt your knees hit the ground. 

“Stay down!” an unknown voice hissed, your eyes lifting as someone stepped out from around a tree. He had his hand pressed against Jack’s mouth as he squirmed in his grasp. Instantly, you tried to stand up but you felt a hard kick to your side in retaliation. 

“I said ‘stay down!’” the voice behind you said, hissing the words between his teeth before the man holding Jack spoke up. 

“The hell’re you doin’?” he demanded, “We was just to get the kid.” 

“What? Have her run back into that camp and tell everybody what happened? We’ll have them all on us ‘fore we can even get anythin’ outta this.” 

What?

“We ain’t got time for this,” the man in front of you replied, “Take ‘em both.” 

You heard Jack let out a cry behind the hand over his mouth, however you didn’t really get the chance to fully process what was happening before you felt a solid hit to the back of your head. Instantly, you heard ringing in your ears, before another hit sent you into darkness. 

                                                            ***

Your head was pounding, feeling the sway of a horse under you as you could feel the strain of your arms tucked behind your back. Blinking open your eyes, you saw the ground under you moving with the quick strides of the horse you were currently slung over the back of. You took in the breath before the events from before flooded into your head, causing you to jerk your head up. You could see passing trees as you were rode down some large pathway, seeing another rider ahead with an arm wrapped around Jack. 

Twisting, you tried to see if you could roll off the horse but the tug at your shoulder told you that you were secured to the back of the saddle. Shit, no. 

You thought about yelling, screaming, trying to see if anybody would catch on but with how fast they were riding up the path and how empty the area seemed to be, you knew it would only just make things worse. 

It wasn’t long before you caught sight of the large structure at the end of the path--a plantation house. You squirmed as they stopped outside the steps, hearing Jack let out a yell as he was pulled from the horse in front of you. The rider of the one you were on the back off slipped off his saddle as the doors to the house opened, your world swaying somewhat as you were pulled to the ground. 

You grunted as your face hit the gravel, likely leaving a couple cuts as you grit your teeth against the sharp and familiar headache. 

“I told you to only get the boy,” a woman’s voice said from the stairs above you. 

“She walked in on us,” you heard the man holding Jack say as you felt a pair of hands grip at your arms, hauling you to your feet. “Guess we’ll have to see what we can do with this one.” 

“Damn useless,” the woman replied, your gaze lifting to see her beckon your captors inside. You nearly tripped over your own feet as you were shoved forward, catching the steps before being dragged up them and into the house. 

You could hear Jack crying, a part of you wanting nothing more than to comfort the kid but you knew it would be only so fleeting if you didn’t get out of here. 

“Bronte’s men are coming within the hour to pick up the boy,” she continued, “I don’t see why they would take her too, but I’ll have to figure something out. Separate them.” 

“What the hell does that mean? Who is that?” you demanded, despite yourself, “H-He’s just a little boy! Please!” 

“Shut her up,” the woman demanded, sounding much like she was done with the situation as Jack called your name. 

“It’s going to be okay, Jack!” you called out as he was carried away from you toward another room. You heard a chuckle behind you, a tug on your arm turning you roughly toward the stairs leading to the upper floors. 

“Sure is,” your captor stated, “Boy’s goin’ to Saint Denis, but you? We’ll get you sorted out.”

[kilesplaysthings]

Hondje’s Secret

Happy October! While brainstorming a fic for spiratualist-nerd!Arthur, I was browsing the ikevam tag and saw lots of love for Theo since his route is coming out. I then had the funniest idea for a fic with him which is in the halloween spirit! combine that with a film I watched today and here we are. so this is all y’all’s fault lol ;) I hope he’s not too ooc since I don’t know his character too well :D

There was something wrong with Hondje. Theo could sense it the moment Sebastian came in with the breakfast tray instead of Ana. She had been living with the horde of vampires for a good month now and they had all gotten used to seeing her every morning pushing the breakfast cart into the dining room, wearing that ridiculous smile that should have been illegal first thing in the morning.

It seems he wasn’t the only one to notice something amiss, as he heard his beloved brother Vincent worriedly ask after her, “Is Ana all right?”

Sebastian hesitated in pouring the coffee and glanced towards Comte St. Germain, who lowered his newspaper at the question. It was almost, Theo noticed, as if Sebastian was seeking the answer from the head of the mansion instead of answering himself. Most suspicious…

“She told us she was unwell, so we thought it necessary to excuse her this morning. She did say, however, that she will be better by this afternoon so there’s no need for alarm,” he answered.

Vincent looked relieved as did many of the others seated at the table.

“I wonder if it’s ‘that time of the month’ for her?” Arthur guessed. He had that annoying self-satisfied smirk on his face he usually had when he knew – or thought he knew – he had guessed something about a woman correctly. “I wouldn’t be surprised if that was it, the poor little bird.”

“’That time of the month’?” Isaac queried, brow furrowed in confusion. “Does something happen to Ana every month?”

“Oh yes. It’s something most every lady goes through, and it can be quite irritating for them, to say the least. Why, as I recall, one time—”

“Oh do shut up,” Mozart muttered, buttering his toast rather loudly. “We don’t need that kind of conversation at breakfast.”

“Mozart is right,” the Comte spoke up. “I wouldn’t want to pry in Ana’s affairs, whatever they may be, Arthur.” He gave the writer a pointed stare. It made Theo smirk.

Arthur Conan Doyle merely chuckled and raised in hands up in surrender. “All right, all right. I’ll stop there. In all seriousness, though, I do hope she isn’t very ill. Perhaps I should go cheer her up later?” He beamed a rather toothy grin.

“No need. I’ve made sure Ana is comfortable,” Sebastian said quickly. He continued to pour out coffee.

“I’m glad. It would be sad not seeing her at breakfast anymore,” Vincent spoke up sadly, moving every heart that was in the room.

Theo patted his shoulder. “I’m sure she’ll be all right, Broer,” he said soothingly. Of course, they were all worried, even those like Mozart and Isaac – while not voicing their concerns – let it show on their faces.

Let it not be said that Theo wasn’t worried as well, but he figured if Sebastian and the Comte were looking after her, she was in good hands. There wasn’t much else for him to do besides hope she would feel better and continue his day as planned.

After breakfast, once he had his things ready and another painting by his brother packed for travel, he prepared to set out to the city for another art dealership. Vincent was a genius as usual, and he had no doubt that this new piece would sell quickly. He smiled down at King, his retriever who liked to follow him where ever he went. It was nice having a cute companion traveling with him into the city and he knew the dog enjoyed the long walks and treats that would be sure to follow once the painting was sold.

As the two of them approached the foyer of the mansion, King suddenly let out an excited yip and bounded for the front parlor.

“King! You foolish mutt!” He muttered irritably. He set his things down before going to retrieve his dog. Opening the door, he found the dog happily nuzzling none other than Ana, who was petting him amidst her daily routine of dusting.

“Oi! Hondje!” He called out, trying to ignore the relief that he felt at seeing her up and about.

She glanced up at him and offered a somewhat wan smile.

“Hey there, Theo.”

He frowned a little as he walked up to her. Something seemed… off.

“Heard you were under the weather this morning. You feeling any better?”

“Oh. I’m fine,” she answered quietly. Her hands massaged the dog’s floppy ears. “It’s nothing to worry about.”

He narrowed his eyes and studied her for a moment. For someone who said they were fine, she didn’t look it. Her skin was pale and clammy. Her hair was a bit disheveled and she looked tired.

“Well, don’t push yourself too much,” he finally said. “No one would want you collapsing or anything.”

Her smile was now more like how she usually smiled at him. She nodded. “I won’t. Thank you for your concern,” she said warmly.

“Concern.” He scoffed. “You really are a naïve pup, aren’t you?”

Now she was frowning. “I wish you would stop calling me that. Do you know how obnoxious it is?” She muttered angrily, quickly standing up and walking back towards the fireplace, away from him.

“I need to get back to cleaning. Good luck with work today,” she continued shortly, implying that her talk with him was over.

That time of the month. Weren’t a lot of women irritable during that time? Theo wondered. He shook his head, trying not to let Arthur’s suppositions influence him.

“Well, if you’re able to bark at me like that, it seems you’re feeling better. That’s good.” He called for King to follow him and turned to leave. “See you later, Hondje.”

He didn’t hear her very well, but he could faintly catch her soft reply of “See you later, Theo.”

He couldn’t help the small smile on his face as he left. Her behavior concerned him a little; she didn’t seem to be as well as she said she was, but he hoped it was just a one-time fluke. Hopefully they would all see her in the morning.

The next few days, however, were the same. Ana never appeared at breakfast and in the afternoon when she did show up, seemed listless and irritated. Arthur still maintained that it was due to “feminine issues,” and it was hard to argue against him. Who were they to say otherwise, after all? Not to mention, none of them felt brave enough to ask her face to face.

“She exhibits all the signs, and I’m sure she knows it. Tired, achy, moody, wanting to be alone. It’s best that we all just let her be. It’ll be over in a few days’ time,” Arthur would tell them.

They tried to remember that and treated her with the utmost kindness. Being a group of gentleman, vampires notwithstanding, they were always ready to help her if she needed it.

“Do you want to go lie down, Ana?” Napoleon asked one day as a few of them were gathered in the den. She had been delivering tea and had spilled it all over the table after trying to pour some with shaky hands.

“I’m fine,” she muttered as she mopped up the mess.

“I can clean it up so you can rest,” Napoleon urged. He offered to take the towel from her but she jerked it away.

“No, it’s all right,” she quickly argued.

“If you’re tired, you’re tired,” Theo remarked as he moved a chess piece. He and Arthur had once again challenged each other to another game. “Rambunctious  pups shouldn’t deny being tired when they are.”

“I said I’m fine.” Was her harsh reply. Napoleon stared at her and Arthur stopped his move, piece mid-air right as he was about to put it on the board. His little spaniel Victoria raised his head and uttered a low growl.

“Let her be, you two,” Arthur finally said, breaking the tension that suddenly filled the room. His voice calmed down Vick as well and the dog laid his head back down on the sofa.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered, looking sad. “I didn’t mean to lash out.”

“Don’t pay them any mind, Ana,” Arthur said soothingly. “But honestly, don’t feel like you have to push yourself especially while on your monthly.”

Theo rolled his eyes so hard, he could have sworn he saw the back of his head. Arthur may have been trying to appear understanding, but he just came off as patronizing. It was plain to see Ana didn’t appreciate his remark either. She shot him a look that demonstrated she was far from amused or appreciative.

“Wow thank you for that,” she muttered. She slapped the towel down on the table and headed for the door. “I’m leaving.”

“You’re such an idiot.” Theo stated once the door was closed.

“Oh she’s fine.” Arthur waved his words away. “It will take a lot more than mere sarcasm to ruffle my feathers.”

“Something seems wrong, though,” Napoleon said thoughtfully. “Ana’s different and I don’t think it’s due to a mere menstrual cycle.”

Napoleon may have been correct, Theo thought, when he found her curled up in a ball on the library sofa the next day. He had been looking for King and found that both he and Vick were there lying with her. It was almost like they could sense what was troubling her. Every time she quietly groaned in pain, they would emit a soft whine.

“Ana?” He called her by her actual name, which caused her to stare up at him with bleary eyes.

“Oh. Theo. It’s you.” Her hair fell down around her face in unkempt waves. “Sorry. I’m not myself today.”

“Yeah, no kidding.” He shooed the two dogs away and sat on the edge of the sofa. “Let’s get you back to your room. Can you walk?”

She slowly nodded. “Probably.”

He gently grasped her arm and helped her to sit up. Then, slipping his arm around her thin waist, he helped her stand. She flinched a little, but didn’t say anything to oppose him. Instead, she clutched the back of his vest with an iron grip. They made their way out of the library and down the hall towards her room. She tried not to stumble, but she was quite weak and he had to catch her a couple of times so she wouldn’t fall.

“Seriously, what is wrong with you?” He muttered as they neared her room.

“Excuse me?”  She gave him a look.

“You heard me. We all thought Arthur was right; that this was just what a human woman goes through every month. And don’t look at me like that, most of us have all been married before. We know what you go through. But that’s not it, is it? I would have smelled it otherwise. So what is it?”

He knew he was coming off as blunt, but he truly was concerned. Ana didn’t take it well, however.

“Whatever it is, it has nothing to with you!” She snapped. “I said I would be fine in a few days, and I meant it. So just leave me alone until then!”

She shrugged off his arm and staggered into her bedroom, shutting the door in his face.

Theo huffed. “We can’t help but worry about you when you act like that, you mongrel,” he muttered. He stalked down the hall to his room, jamming his hands into his pockets, now in a rather foul mood.

It only took one more day for Theo to have all his questions and concerns answered.

The moon was full and bright that night as both he and Arthur came home from a late night trip to the bar. Arthur was quite plastered at this point while Theo was as sober as could be. So, of course, it was up to him to get his reckless friend home. They staggered into the mansion, Arthur unabashedly singing a jaunty tune. It took all of Theo’s self-control not to just dump him on the mansion floor and leave him there for Sebastian to find him in the morning.

“I swear, you owe me big time,” he groused out as he deposited the drunk Scotsman on his bed.

“Yeah yeah. I’ll be sure to make it up to all three of you in the morning.” Arthur drawled out. A minute later, he was snoring away.

“Domkop,” he muttered. “I have no idea why I choose to be this guy’s friend.” Even so, he couldn’t help but smile. Why he was fond of this womanizing, arrogant writer, he’d never know. The fact that Arthur had quite the charisma and contagious charm to him may have been a part of it, but Theo refused to acknowledge that.

Now beginning to feel tired himself, he made his way to his room, looking forward to a good night’s rest.

That’s when he heard it: the sound of shattering glass followed by a banging on one of the nearby doors. There was then a cringe-worthy scraping sound of wood. It made a chill go down his spine. He walked slowly towards the sounds at first, but his pace quickened when he began to hear low groaning.

The source of the noises all came from one room. Ana’s room. Why was she awake? It was late: half past two. And he knew she was not a late night person. He placed his hand on the door and leaned close to listen. The groans grew louder and he thought he heard a low growl. Suddenly, there came the sound of fabric tearing and the groanings turned into cries. Not cries of pleasure. Cries of agony.

“Ana? Ana!” He rammed his hand on the door.

The cries continued, not heeding him.

“I’m coming in!” He announced.

“Don’t!” Came a tormented voice. It was a lower voice, but somehow, it was still hers. “Just go away!”

“Oh shut up! If you’re in trouble, you shouldn’t be alone!” He shouted. “I’m coming in!”

With his vampiric strength, he knocked in the door in record time. What he beheld inside left him shocked. The room was a mess. A shattered pitcher and basin lay all over the floor in pieces. The bed sheets were in tatters. Clothes were shredded. There were what he could only figure to be claw marks all over the furniture and walls. And there was blood. So much blood. The moonlight streaming in between the tattered curtains shone down on a figure writhing under a bedsheet. A long thick chain was tied to the bed post and seemed to be connected to that covered figure that was still groaning in pain.

After taking it all in, he slowly approached the sheet and carefully lifted it. His eyes widened in shock.

“Ana…” He breathed her name. “You’re…”

“I told you not to come in!” Her altered voice wailed, or more distinctly, howled.

What were unmistakably Ana’s green eyes stared up at him in horror, but her face. It was no longer the face of a human woman. The snout was too long. The ears pointed and on top of her head. And she was covered in a thick fur the same color as her hair. She was huddled up in a ball and her claws clutched at the rug below her. A bushy tail curled around her body defensively.

“Wolf.. werewolf…” He muttered, aghast. “They’re real…”

“Oh shut up!” She cried, exposing an impressive set of canines. “Vampires are real, so why not werewolves, huh?”

He blinked. “Yeah, good point.”

“I told you not to come in here! Why couldn’t you have just listened?”

“What was I supposed to do?” He argued back. “You sounded like you were in immense pain! And it looks like you were, at that!”

Her ears flattened and she lay her head down on the sheet, looking like a kicked dog.

“You could have just kept walking. This isn’t something to be worried about. This only happens every--”

“Every full moon, right? I’ve heard the legend.” He walked over and took a seat on the rug beside her.

“I take it the Comte and Sebastian know?”

“Yes. I had to tell them if I was to leave here peacefully. They took it rather well, for vampires.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” He asked, frowning.

She scoffed. “Vampires always look down on werewolves. They see us as lower creatures that can’t ever control their urges.”

“Well you don’t really help your case by having that attached to you.” He nodded at the chain tied to the bedpost.

“It’s for precaution!” She retorted. “I can usually handle myself quite well! I’m still young, so sometimes I do have trouble keeping control. But I’m still training myself.”

She stood up on all fours and approached him, the chain jangling behind her.

“For instance, a lesser werebeast would want to tear all of you apart just by looking at you, but I don’t. I’d rather not eat vampire, if I can help it.” She sat down on her haunches and stared at him reproachfully.

He rolled his eyes at her. “Well I’m glad I’m not edible, I guess. It’s good to know you’re so well-trained.”

She snarled at him. “You think you’re funny, don’t you?”

“I think so, yes.” He then smirked. “So, you won’t attack even if I do this?”

He put his hand on her head between her ears and ruffled her fur. It was surprisingly just as soft as her normal hair.

“Want me to bite that hand off?” She growled.

“I’d like to see you try! Looks like my “pet” names for you were quite accurate, huh? No wonder they annoyed you!” He began to laugh.

“If you’re going to just mock me then leave before I tear out your throat!”

“Now, now, that’s my job.” His voice lowered and he grinned at her. “You know, you’re rather cute, for a werewolf.”

He could see her hackles rising. “I mean it, Theo! I don’t need any teasing from you!”

“Oh, but I’m not teasing. I’m in complete earnest. Now, let’s do something about this mess you’ve made.” He got up and headed to the door.

Ana growled a little. He was acting so smug, it was annoying.

“Are you going to tell the others?” She demanded to know.

He paused, his hand on the doorknob, and turned to smile at her.

“Now why would I do that? I rather like having this secret with you. Granted, the Comte and Sebastian know as well, but they probably haven’t seen you like this, have they?”

Ana’s silence was the confirmation he needed. He grinned more.

“I’ll make sure to take care of you every full moon, Hondje. It will be like you’re my very own pet.”

She bared her teeth at him angrily. “Don’t do me any favors!”

“It’s no trouble, really.” He continued to beam a great smile at her. It made her fur stand on end.

“Now, be a good girl and stay put. I’ll be right back with a broom to clean up this glass, all right?”

And with that, he was gone, leaving Ana to bemoan her fate even further. Theo, on the other hand, was strangely satisfied with this new revelation. He was quite gleeful, actually.

A werewolf. How extraordinary! Of course the others would be shocked to see her like that, but I rather like her like this too. Heh. I have always been fond of any kind of canine. How different is a werewolf?

As he went his merry way, Ana buried her furry head under the sheets again. Why? Of all people to see her like this, why did it have to be Theodorus Van Gogh?! She let out a low whine, knowing that from here on out, he would make things – quite interesting for her to say the least. Or perhaps, nightmarish was the better adjective, she decided.

[tornrose24]

Face-to-face (Red Diamond AAU drabble)

(Read the ‘Separation’ drabble first before reading this) Hey look at that, I kept my word about the continuation! :)

Original Gem AU (as well as zircon!George, sapphire!Harold, and peridot!Melvin) belongs to angerydj.

Alexandra belongs to me.

----

George and Harold were face to face with someone they thought they’d never see again  in the living room of Edith’s house. They had just filled him in on the entire truth which was strange even to them.

Red Quartz stared at them in stunned silence before glancing at the bubbled gem that George held. It was strange seeing one half of his own gem outside his body, but it was even stranger knowing that it wasn’t even the exact kind of gem he believed he was. “So what you’re saying is that I’m actually Red Diamond, and he’s been alive the whole time?” He asked for clarification.

“Yes.” Harold nodded.

“So all of my memories from before we started rebelling against Red Diamond...” Red Quartz remembered them–emerging from the earth, being easily distracted with Earth’s beauty when he was supposed to be working, meeting the young gems and learning that they loved having fun more than working too, and so much more.

“We made them up for you.”

“But neither of you were supposed to still be alive, let alone get separate bodies!” George looked down at the other half of the diamond in the bubble. ��In fact, I don’t think this has ever happened to any gem before!”

“We probably should let him out, but you need to help us first. I think he was starting to brake when he got angry, and you’re probably the only one who can fix him.”

“But he’s still going to be mad, so we need to be ready in case anything happens!” George looked at Harold with a wince. “So... are we ready?” “Might as well get it over with.” Harold agreed with a matching wince before George shattered the bubble and held the stone out to Red Quartz. They were not looking forward to the inevitable and no matter how much they wanted to put it off, they knew it would only make things worse if they kept the gem bubbled for too long.

Red Quartz took the stone and nervously looked at it until–to the zircon and sapphire’s equal disgusted fascination–he licked over every inch of it. It didn’t take long until the cracks started to repair themselves and then the broken gem itself began to glow.

Harold remembered. “Oh shoot, wasn’t he a giant when–?!”

The stone flew out of Red Quartz’s hand as a form began to emerge from it. Fortunately for everyone, the diamond had returned to the same size as Red Quartz as well as the more pinkish coloring. Unfortunately there was a slight addition to his appearance as while he had been repaired, the damage he had done to himself left a few scars. The jagged red and orange lines that had gone up his arms and spread out from the gem and across his stomach were still there.

Benjamin groaned and held his head as he found himself trying to come to his senses once more. He realized very quickly that neither Watermelon Tourmaline or Carnelian were present and the living room he was in was somewhat familiar. He turned his head to see a very nervous looking sapphire and zircon who looked as if they wanted to be anywhere but there in that moment.

“Uh... hey!” George let out a squeak as he waved his hand. His forced smile struggled to stay in place as the diamond before him began to develop a familiar scowl.

“Long time no see!” Harold also joined in. “Uh, you’re looking good–!”

Right on cue, he got up in their faces and started yelling at the top of his lungs.

“I TOLD YOU TWO TO KEEP AN EYE ON HER AND NOT LET HER GET INVOLVED!” Benjamin’s yelling nearly made them fall over. “IT WAS JUST ONE SIMPLE THING AND YET I WAKE UP TO FIND MYSELF STARING AT QUARTZ, WITH ONLY HALF OF MY GEM IN ME! WHICH APPARENTLY WAS BECAUSE YOU LET TOURMALINE RIP IT OUT OF MY OWN CHILD?! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?!”

“We didn’t know he’d do that!” George flinched.

“We didn’t know that Homeworld gems would come back to Earth to begin with!” Harold protested.

“THEN HOW WAS IT THAT YOU FAILED THE ONE ORDER I KNEW YOU’D ACTUALLY OBEY?! AND WHY IS HE HERE?!” Benjamin gestured to a stunned Red Quartz. It then hit him as to what he just said and shot up in confusion. “Wait... how are you...?” He stammered.

“Oh uh... hi Red Diamond?” Red Quartz gave him an awkward wave.

“How did–? Why are you here?!” Benjamin kept stammering and pointed. “How are you here?!”

“Its because your gem split in half.” All eyes turned to Melvin who just entered the room. The peridot was the only one who had anything close to medical experience with gems and had been checking on Alexandra. “I’m not sure how you managed the split personality, but because it was a near fifty-fifty split in the gem, your personalities were separated into each half. Its honestly a miracle that both of you are still intact, but you almost corrupted yourself thanks to your buffoonish rampage.” He pointed to the angry markings on Benjamin’s arms and stomach (while forgetting who exactly he just insulted).

Benjamin glanced down at himself and it was only then that he realized the damage that he had caused to himself. A diamond had never been cracked, or corrupted, so no one knew what the consequences would be if that happened. He could only reflect on experience to understand what almost happened and for a moment he felt a flash of fear. Then he remembered why it happened in the first place and was about to ask when Red Quartz beat him to the question.

“So is she still alright?” His other counterpart nervously asked with the small twinge of hope that he himself was too afraid to have. “My– Uh, I mean our daughter?” He glanced at Benjamin. Neither of them liked the use of the word ‘our’ for their own reasons.

“Well to put it bluntly, she’s not dead.” Melvin answered. “And when I think about it, I’m honestly not surprised.”

For one moment everyone was relieved, but then Benjamin frowned. “What do you mean you aren’t surprised?”

“Remember the human zoo? Watermelon Tourmaline was doing experiments with the humans and he was never able to keep female gems from dying whenever they had a child with them. He wanted to use male gems to see if the outcome could be different and that both parent and child would live. Naturally no one wanted to take that risk, but he suspected that because children are less dependent on fathers during pregnancy and the first year of life, there might of been a slight chance that it would work. And considering you’re a diamond, Alexandra had the guaranteed one hundred percent success that he hypothesized. I’d be glad to go into further detail if you’re curious.”

“And you never told us this because...?” Harold asked as he and George stared at Melvin.

“Well I assumed he was wrong and that Red Quartz was dead for real.”

There was a stunned confusion in the room.

Then Benjamin snapped with an enormous, disbelieving “WHAT?!”

****

Both halves of the same gem found themselves in Alexandra’s bedroom on both sides of her bed.

The child had been asleep in bed for quite sometime after being tended to. She had been given a very loose shirt that was pulled up to reveal the bandages over her navel. There was no telling if there’d be any scars but her father’s gem would never again be a physical part of her. 

Red Quartz couldn’t stop staring at Benjamin. The gem was kneeling beside the sleeping child and looking at her as if she were the entire world to him. He couldn’t believe that this was supposed to be Red Diamond–the sadistic tyrant who had made it more than clear that he didn’t care what happened to anyone so long as he got what he wanted. The eldest and nastiest of the three diamond siblings, yet had never owned his own planet until he had Earth. 

Red Quartz remembered how utterly cruel the diamond had been in dismissing his concerns the first time he met him face to face. (But if he and Red Diamond were the same, then who was sitting on the throne that day?) At least when the gem was on his rampage it was believable that he was seeing Red Diamond, but now it was as if he was someone completely different.

He couldn’t stop fidgeting–one of them had to say something, right?

“So you really are Red Diamond.” Red Quartz finally spoke up.

“I don’t go by that name anymore.” Benjamin didn’t have the will to put as much force in those words as he would have.

“You’re actually still alive. No one on Homeworld knows–not even White Diamond.”

Benjamin couldn’t help but twitch and feel a wave of unwanted memories at the mention of his ‘mother’ (as well as her insults and how she humiliated him, the number of times he was locked up in that dark tower room, and her making him feel like he’d never be as good as Blue or Yellow in her eyes). This time he was a bit harsher when he snapped “And I’d prefer to keep it that way!”

Red Quartz flinched and wisely changed the subject. “So you’re actually me... I’m actually you.”

A brief silence fell as Benjamin finally looked up at Red Quartz.

“Yes. You are me–you were my disguise given a personality in order to throw off suspicion.”

“I don’t understand.”

“I could pretend I was a quartz, but George and Harold made it clear that I wasn’t fooling anyone with the way I was acting. So they created a new personality I could slip into–someone who could be powerful enough to put an end to things. Someone who was believable as part of a rebellion. Honestly I’m amazed no one realized that we had the exact same face.” Benjamin couldn’t help but snort over how stupid most of Homeworld had been to not notice that. (And unlike Blue and the gem he took on as a wife, Benjamin didn’t have the ‘its my ‘child’’ excuse.)

“Then why didn’t anyone tell me before? Why am I still around if you were using me to trick everyone?!” “The hypnosis was supposed to be undone when the war was over! Then nearly everyone got wiped out and that included anyone who could have fixed me! Besides, I’m pretty sure you can figure out why no one told you!”

“Well it doesn’t help! I don’t know if I can trust anyone now! I mean does Alexandra even know?”

Benjamin didn’t respond and simply looked at his daughter. He knew by the way she instantly recognized him that she knew–it wasn’t Red Quartz that she identified as her father in that moment, but him as himself. It was something that terrified him because then that meant she knew everything about him, but it oddly gave him some a small sense of joy because–

She knows who I really am to her. She didn’t see me as the villain.

“I don’t know.” He lied.

“Well, what are we supposed to do now?” Red Quartz asked. “We’re both alive, but she’s got two dads now? Do we have to share her until we know what to do? Do we have to share Edith too?” All the while, Benjamin went from concerned, to annoyed, to a bit possessive until it hit him.

“Oh God, Edith doesn’t know yet, does she?!” He panicked and grabbed his head as Alexandra began to wake up.

“Oh... that’s not good.” Red Quartz frowned as he realized how that’d pose a problem.

“Uh,” At the sound of the small, tired voice, both halves swiftly spun their attention back to the small child in bed who looked back and forth at each one. “Are you playing a trick on me again, guys?” She raised an eyebrow.

“Hi Alexandra!” Red Quartz beamed in delight and waved.

It then hit the child who remembered what happened as she looked at Red Quartz. “Wait... you’re actually–?” She then looked at Benjamin who was both incredibly relieved as well as nervous. “If this isn’t a prank, then why do I have both versions of you in my room?”

“Sweetie!” The door swung open and Edith bursted in as if to make the moment more complicated for everyone. Her hair was falling into her face and she still wore her gloves and apron from work. “Oh God are you alright?!”

“Edith!” Red Quartz’s joyful grin widened.

“Edith!” Benjamin barely breathed at the sight of the love of his life that he thought he would no longer see again.

Edith stared at both Red Quartz and Benjamin and completely forgot her daughter. Her visible eye widened until it was about to pop out. “You... you’re...” Edith stammered as she realized what Harold had tried to warn her about on the phone before she ran away from her work.

Overwhelmed with the knowledge that not only was her husband alive once more, but that both of halves of him were existing at the same time in separate bodies, she pulled an old cliche in the book of cliches and promptly fainted to the floor.

[itsd-man]

My retrospective on the Star vs. the Forces of Evil Series Finale, 1 year later.

One year ago today on May 19, 2019, the Series Finale of Star vs. the Forces of Evil episode “Cleaved” aired, thus marking the end of the series. I just want to let you know that Star vs. the Forces of Evil was one of my favorite animated shows during the latter half of the 2010s during my late teens into my early adulthood, I loved the characters and the storytelling and if I’m a bit biased, Starco, but despite a few hiccups, I do think that overall It was a good series that I believe that people should watch. You may not entirely agree with everything I have to say, but I want to talk about my further opinions on the episode Cleaved and a few episodes before that as a whole, and why I didn’t think the episode is bad as some people have said. 

Some fans and critics felt that the ending was rushed, and incomplete and left many plot points open, many accused of Star committing a “Multiverse Mass Genocide” and only Destroyed Magic, all because she thought she’d never see Marco again and that it’s the only way they’ll be together, which rubbed some people the wrong way, with some thinking it’s the “Worst Series Finale of All Time”, or something like that somewhat making me feel guilty, but I wanted to give an in-depth, level-headed approach to this, and why I think there’s some good in it.

I just want to let you know that while I thought for the most part Season 4 was okay, I would be lying if I said it was far from perfect, or downright terrible. One of the many plot points during Season 4 was Mina Loveberry becoming the big baddie at the end of the series, while I did like Toffee during Season 1-3 his arc was pretty much over when he was defeated by Star in “Toffee”, I felt like Mina wasn’t exactly a competent villain, but okay, given the whole Monsters are evil towards Mewmans. It was interesting to see why a Mewman like herself doesn’t like monsters from a Mina’s point-of-view.  It’s not uncommon for a series to have more than one villain and Star Vs. is no exception. 

The whole Mewmans’ prejudice/racist against Monsters was a thing all the way back in Season 1 of the series, Star hated Monsters at the beginning, and that’s why she kept fighting them, prejudice towards something doesn’t happen immediately, it’s taught, which Star learned that it wasn’t right as the series went along. 

Now, one of the other reasons why some think that people didn’t really like Season 4 or Season 3 to an extent, was the somewhat fast-paced, Romantic Relationships like with Tom and Star, and Kelly and Marco. Really, I didn’t mind it, but I mainly didn’t really think that Kelly and Marco’s short stint was very necessary down the line, and the break-up in “A Boy and His DC-9000XE” felt underwhelming, to say the least. It was the show’s way of portraying that in Most Teenagers like Marco, Star, Tom, etc the first person you meet or date isn’t necessarily going to be the perfect match. 

Next, one of the other aspects I want to talk about is when Star’s Mother, Moon Butterfly, conspiring with Mina Loveberry to overthrow Eclipsa’s reign as queen, helped the Magical High Commission and freeing Globgor in “Cornonation” and betraying Star and Eclipsa’s trust, but I want to explain why this isn’t completely out-of-character for her. 

Moon when she was about Star’s age, was a carefree young teen until her Mother, Comet was tragically killed by Toffee, and that forced her to make a decision with her life, and that’s the starting point of when she had a grudge against Monsters.  Moon only did what she thought was best for her people as Queen even if it wasn’t her intention of risking their lives in doing so, which gave her the nickname “Moon the Undaunted.” 

You kind of have to look at this at Moon’s perspective, she was fully accepting of Eclipsa being queen, relieving her of her stressful life of being queen, even at one point rejecting Mina’s plan overthrow Eclipsa, until she saw Mewmans being kicked out of their homes, that and she Inadvertently caused the Realm of Magic to be partially corrupted after that fight with Eclipsa’s daughter, Meteora in Season 3′s “Tough Love”, it made Moon struggle with herself in that she was no longer the queen anymore and being a commoner, that made Moon decide that she should take back the title of the queen because she Eclipsa was being incompetent as ruler of the kingdom. She explicitly said to Star and doesn’t trust her and distanced herself from her all because of those past events.

To further drive that idea that Eclipsa was “unfit” to rule Mewni, was when she used the Spell With No Name on the Solarian Warrior in the episode “The Right Way”, in which really took a lot of energy to use, but Eclipsa didn’t mind doing it, but Star was hesitant of her decisions as well.

I just want to let you know that Moon is not an “Evil, Heartless Person” who wouldn't do something like this, just for the sake of doing so. It’s well, she felt separated from her family, especially from her daughter, for trusting Eclipsa, and in a way, she felt like Star liked Eclipsa more than her, but she what she didn’t expect when trusting Mina in trying to make Eclipsa stand down as queen was she underestimated Mina’s mental health when making those Solarian Warriors. 

Moon didn’t want Eclipsa hurt, or any other Mewman or Monster to get hurt, she thought she had everything under control when she tried to undo the Solarian Spell, which ended up backfiring on her causing Mina to turn on Moon. I think that the writers were trying to convey that Moon is a complex, flawed character and that even good characters can make mistakes, but I think it could have been explained much more in my opinion.

I love Moon, she is one of my most favorite characters in Star Vs., behind Star herself. Honestly, I was shocked it happened, it wasn’t particularly my favorite aspect from Season 4 to say the least. But that didn’t stop me from not liking her near the end, which I’ll get to soon. 

All of these events ultimately decided for Star to reconsider if using Magic was worth it after all, as she claimed that Magic causes more harm than good, and while I didn’t think the aspect was terrible, it was just that it was sudden. 

Magic was a core aspect all the way at the beginning of the series, and the sudden misconception that all Magic is evil was based on Star’s tough decision can come across as a misunderstanding, and in Star’s mind, she thought if no one had the ability, then she can be able to defeat Mina and her Solarian Warriors as a last-ditch effort, and that no one including Mewmans and Monsters can use it for evil purposes anymore, but she also thought that while also doing that, her best friend Marco, who is now her boyfriend, may not be ever seen again. 

This is probably one of the more divisive opinions here, in “Cleaved” when Star ultimately decides to destroy the magic, and doing so would also mean the Magical High Commission (Rhombulous, Omnitraxus, Hekapoo) and most notably Glossaryck, and the First Born as well as most likely some spells in the wand would cease to exist. 

People compared Star’s actions to Toffee’s attempting during “The Battle for Mewni” when he attempted to get rid of the wand, when really, Toffee only wanted to destroy magic, not for the good of Mewni, but to get back at the Mewmans for the generations of prejudice against them (and to a lesser extent, Moon in particular) for severing his finger on his hand, saying that She fulfilled Toffee’s goal, but really, Star’s reason for doing it was completely different. 

This was considered a “controversial” aspect in the series because critics and fans thought it implied that Star intentionally caused a “Mass Genocide” and not just a Mass Genocide on Mewni but implied the entire multiverse in the show and that ideology somewhat alienated the fanbase after that and people were extremely upset about it. It was, in my opinion, based on misjudgment.

In my opinion, I don’t believe Star is a genocidal maniac, I’m sure the wasn’t the writers’ intention to imply that Star did something as barbaric just because she was angry, or that she’ll never see Marco again, which it’s just simply not true. It was more the lines like a “Sacrifice for the Greater Good” with the past Mewni Queens helping Star, Moon, Eclipsa, and Meteora helping her. It upsets me and it still does that some would think that, but this is the internet where you’re free to make an opinion. It just doesn’t mean I have to agree with it. 

It was meant to symbolize the end of the troubled history of the most particularly, the Age of  Monarchy and Magic in the Butterfly Family, and as far as we’re concerned, all of the Magic Spells were tied to Mewni and the Butterfly Family reign, and nowhere else in the Multiverse, and with the Former Queens who aren’t alive anymore, their souls could finally be in peace now that it’s over. 

Also, the scene where Star went back and left her family to be with Marco on Earth, but she sees Marco hasn’t left even after the portal to Earth closed. It symbolizes how much she cares about him and is willing to leave everything being just so that they can be together, and that even that without Magic that they belong together, so what happened was their love (and a last bit of magic) caused this blue portal to surround them causing them to go back to their respective dimensions. 

After they destroyed the Magic, Star is back on Mewni with her mother, Moon finding her. The Monsters were free from the Solarian Warriors, and Mina was defeated. Although Moon tried to help her out, she still didn’t learn her ways after that, and said that there will always be people like her who think differently from one another, and escaped into the woods. What I think was an important message learned while watching the series, is that no matter how hard you try, whether in fiction or non-fiction, racism and prejudice will always exist. 

After that, Moon apologized to Star for everything that she’s done and Star and Eclipsa ultimately decide to forgive her, which if I’m gonna be a bit biased here, that aspect is really why I loved “Cleaved” the way it did because Moon as a character means so much and it shows that someone who seems to be a stuck-up, uptight, queen at the beginning of the series who’s had issues with monsters can have a change of heart at the end. Star and Moon although not always seeing eye to eye, still deeply love each other and I couldn’t have it other any other way. 

I don’t think I could ever like the Series Finale is that wasn’t the case with Moon, even if the pacing was a bit fast in that matter.  

They also showed Kelly, Jorby, and Talon in their respective dimensions which to some may not find very satisfying considering they are now stuck in their own respective dimensions. 

Later on, it shows what happened to the Magical High Commission when Magic was destroyed and we see that they were only reduced to Inanimate objects like Omnitraxus which only his skull remains, and Rhombulous’ Crystal Shell and the two snakes he used for hands are just normal snakes, which shows that yes, they’re gone, but they’re not wiped from existence, although Hekapoo and Glossaryck’s remains were unknown.

Then in Mewni, we see a blue portal glowing in the air, similar to the one that Star and Marco created when they hugged each other in the Realm of Magic. Marco now in Earth recovering from being impaled from a Warnicorn, but now that Magic is gone, it was healed, and that’s when he also saw a blue portal.

That’s when Star and Marco race to the portal as it’s shrinking, and while Star did, Marco misses and there was a big explosion, devastated that Marco may never see her again, but nevertheless, he sees Star and they both see a new world among them where both Earth and Mewni are Cleaved Together, and they’re happy to see each other once again, knowing they’ll be forever happy thus concluding the series.

The definition of Cleaved means to split or divide or to adhere closely, stick, cling, or remain faithful to, or to put it simply: to take Something (or Someone) apart or bring them together, and that’s exactly what happened. Star thought the only way to solve her issue was to Destroy Magic and risk never seeing Marco ever again, which technically did, but their love eventually, caused their worlds to combine into one. So no, Star and Marco didn’t intentionally destroy magic just for the sake of being together with Marco, when it was actually the complete opposite of what happened. Again, she destroyed Magic so that no one could use it for harm anymore. It was meant to convey the idea that solving one problem, creates another and overall it created new beginnings for the characters. 

Star could have chosen to not go the Destroy the Magic route and Star, Eclipsa, Moon could have used their magic to try to defeat Mina, but Star didn’t want to take that risk, possibly towards the Monsters losing their lives. What I like about Star of how she evolved as a character is that she is willing to take risks in her life, for better or worse. Star only wanted to live a normal life as a Teenager and didn’t want to deal with the stress that came from her family’s history of Magic anymore. 

I know some people liked the Series Finale and the two characters Marco and Star being together at the end, while some didn’t really care for that particular aspect (Starco or wanted a different/no ship for Endgame), which is understandable, but that’s the kind of story creator, Daron Nefcy wanted to tell, even if the pacing felt a bit too quick, and unfortunately some critiques didn’t really catch on to that kind of storytelling. Nefcy stated that the would love to do more with Star if Disney ever decided to make a continuation of the series in some form. 

Then there’s the idea that Earth and Mewni cleaved together being a bad thing, because of the supposed consequences it may bring like “Will Humans respond kindly or unkindly to the Monsters from Mewni?”, “Will society crumble in this new world?”, “Will Humans try to retaliate against the Monsters?” Basically, having a pessimistic approach to this, and while it’s not an issue to have this kind of conception, I think it’s mostly just overthinking it a bit too much, which again, rubbed some people the wrong way. I guess there’s some questions we’ll never have an answer to. 

Obviously, if you’re looking at this from a realistic point of view then yes, you would have some questions regarding that issue, but in Star’s world, it’s not particularly meant to be taken all that seriously. It’s only a fictional cartoon, not everything has to make complete sense. 

They’ve even hinted at the idea that Earth and Mewni would be cleaved as far back as Season 2 in the episode “Into the Wand”. 

Again, the idea of Star creating a multiverse Genocide spanning the entire multiverse in the show is absolutely ridiculous, as the series never implied it one bit near the end of the series, we can see lots of other Mythical Creatures still exist like the Dragon Cycles still there, Warnicorns, Mermaids, Monsters, the Ponyheads, are there, the Laser Puppies are just regular puppies, meaning they haven’t completely vanished, again the Magical High Commission may no longer exist, but again they’re reduced to mostly inanimate objects.

I would be totally lying if I said “Cleaved” was the worst series finale ever, or that I absolutely loathe it, I’m more upset that I’m kind of in the vocal minority, though you have every right to agree or disagree. Were there some aspects in Season 4 or the series as a whole that I wished could be different? absolutely. You have to understand that no series is perfect no matter what you watch, I don’t care what anyone says, all they can do is try, The crew is aware of the criticism the finale got, and they’re not happy about it, the writers tried to do their best, and unfortunately, not everyone liked it A.K.A. they’re sorry if you weren’t satisfied with it. 

If you think “Cleaved” could have been longer or was rushed, it’s okay to think that, but if you want to make it Technical, the last four episodes of the series were all connected together starting from “Mama Star” all the way to “Cleaved”. So think of the Finale as one big 2-Hour Special similar to how the first four episodes of Season 3 was labeled as “The Battle for Mewni”

In conclusion, if you were happy with the series as a whole, then good for you, if you weren’t then I’m sorry to hear. Maybe try to look at the Series Finale episode differently if you weren’t happy, and take my thoughts' and opinions into consideration, and maybe you’ll see it in a different tune. This took nearly two months for me to type this, but I think it would be worth it in the long run. 

This show meant a lot to me in my late Teens going into my early adulthood, and I’m sure there people who still love it today, even with its shortcomings for generations to come. I can’t imagine living without it, and I’m sure others feel the same way too. This series, in my opinion, has some wonderful characters you can probably relate to like Star, Marco, Jackie, Janna, Moon, River,  Eclipsa, Ludo, Toffee, for example. They’re far from perfect and that’s exactly why I love them so much. 

I’m not saying your opinion on the Series Finale will change, I’m saying maybe don’t take it too seriously.  Maybe see it in a different light. After all, it’s only a fictional series. There’s nothing wrong in discussing and giving thoughts about it, but at the end of the day, it’s only a cartoon, they don’t have to be 100% realistic. Once again, I think Star vs. the Forces of Evil is a charming series with fun, loving characters an interesting story, and important life lessons along the way. This is one series that will forever hold a special place in my heart.  

[summonerscenarios]

It's nice to see a new writer here. Best of luck and don't overwork yourself. Can I request headcanons for Ryota, Shiro, and Kengo reacting to when MC had that panic attack in class in Chapter 9. Have a good day! :)

Aaaaaah thank you so much hun~! I’ll be sure to do my best. And hey first request is finally finished! Tho the fact it’s 1AM really sets a  precedent for the upcoming requests lmao.

Hope this turned out okay! And have a good day too! ^^

----

Ryota

Ryota definitely panics the most out of the three when it happens. He hears the commotion and murmurs of confusion just in time to turn in his seat and spot what’s going on. For a moment he thinks that you’re just talking to Mr. Jinn but then he hears the murmurs flood the classroom and the teacher's faces turn from confusion to worry and then he just knows that something’s wrong.

It doesn’t get better once you’re rushed out to the nurses office - Kengo’s insisting on going with you while Shiro’s attempting to get him to sit back down and Mr. Mononobe is trying to keep the class calm and ease the concerns of your classmates. Ryota knows that the best thing they can do is leave you in the care of the teachers until class ends but that doesn’t do anything to calm his worries, if anything he’s so worried that he couldn’t even pay attention to the rest of his lesson even if he wanted to. 

It really doesn’t take much to figure out what’s wrong either - with everything that happened not even a few days ago, the revelations about the game and the mess with the exceptions on top of having to pretend that everything’s normal at school is a lot to carry on anyone’s shoulders, and Ryota understands just how hard it’s weighing down on you better than you’d think.

When class does finish Ryota really wants to go and check up on you as do the other summoners, but for the sake of not wanting to overwhelm you (and fill the infirmary with worried classmates) he ends up staying behind with the others while Shiro goes to check up on you a bring you the things left behind in the classroom.

He insists that Shiro takes some snacks for you with him to cheer you up/ give you a boost if you’re feeling drained afterwards since he’s not able to go give them to you himself and makes Shiro promise to let you know that he and the other Summoners are there for you if you need anything at all! He honestly won’t really stop worrying until he sees you’re okay for himself - even if you say you’re fine expect Ryota’s going to be very clingy over the next couple of days just to make sure that you’re really going to be okay.

Shiro

Though all of the boys recognize that something’s not quite right about the way you’re acting Shiro is the first one to notice the initial signs of a panic attack. He spots you just before Mr. Jinn intervenes and honestly the look on your face makes him freeze up. With eyes blown wide, posture rigid and trembling unresponsive to the teacher’s attempts to get your attention it’s clear you need to get out of there, and for a few moments there’s such sheer panic on your face that Shiro can feel his stomach drop at the sight.

He knows the signs of a panic attack, and has probably dealt with them more than he’d like to remember, but going through it and seeing someone going through it is a different matter entirely, and he hates that there’s not really anything that he can do to help comfort you through it. Thankfully the teachers are quick to take over the situation and make sure that you’re taken somewhere safer to ride through your panic attack and give you a chance to calm down and collect your thoughts.

Shiro’s of course as concerned as the rest of the summoners, however he tries his best to focus back in the lesson, picking up the things you’ve left behind as well as making notes to bring to you once homeroom finishes as e doesn’t want you to miss out on anything while you’re gone even despite his worries. It takes a while to convince Kengo not to come barging in with him to check up on you the moment the bell rings but he’s going to make his way there as soon as possible.

It’s only once he’s on his way to visit you at the nurse’s office that he let’s his worry really show - he’s nearly close to running at one point just to close the small distance between the classroom and where you are. And you can bet he’s gonna be overthinking the whole way there, trying to think about what he’s going to say to the nurse when he gets there or what to do in case you’re still resting or don’t want any visitors.

The relief only really washes over him once he sees that you’re already up and awake, though he’s surprised that the nurse left you alone considering the state you’d been in when you were first brought in, but it’s quickly forgotten . He doesn’t want to push too much about what happened and he knows that you’ll want some time to yourself until you’re ready to talk so he gives you some space, letting you know that he’s there for anything if you need him. 

Kengo

Kengo damn near leaps from his desk when Mr. Jinn approaches your seat with rising concern. Sure he knew something was up cause you’d been pretty out of it long before class had actually started, even he could see all the others were acting weird since the fight, but when you weren’t responding and bordered on the verge of passing out at one point he didn’t just wanna sit there without at least trying to jump in to help, even not knowing what he can do to help.

He joins in on trying to get your attention back on the present moment, calling out to you and getting increasingly more distressed seeing you struggle to focus on the people trying to talk to you and even where you are. He’s pissed that he doesn’t know how to handle these situations so he feels useless being unable to help you through the panic attack even a little. Seeing the teachers all stepping in to take care of you does relieve the stress somewhat but he’s still on edge seeing this side of his partner that they don’t usually allow to crack through - he’s used to snarky comments and jokes and fighting spirit so this? This really worries him.

Argues about going with you to make sure you’re gonna be okay both during class and after the bell rings and Shiro ends up having to talk him down both times. Even trusting Mr. Mononobe and the other teachers he doesn’t feel right just leaving you on your own like that and definitely makes a show of arguing his case, thankfully he simmers down a little once everything is sorted out but even then he is still riled up for the rest of the day as if waiting for a sign that you need him to come running.

Kengo’s got faith in his partner though; sure things are rough and the Summoners are carrying something on their shoulders heavier than they’ve ever dealt with before but he knows that you’ll come back from whatever is getting you so worked up stronger! He’s seen you break through it time and time again and he just knows this ain’t gonna be any different which is why he’s the most confident out of the three that you’re surely gonna bounce back from this in the end.

Totally tries to play off that he was ever worried in the first place once you’re finally back but every single member of the Summoners are quick to rebuke that, noting that he was pacing holes in the floor and practically bristling with anxiousness in the time that you were away. He denies it of course but with how flustered he gets it’s easy to see that he was just as worried as the rest of them, and just as relieved to have you back.

[spookyboywhump]

Previous

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 Is this kind of more filler to bridge the gap between the last post and the next planned event? Maybe. Did I focus more on Zander’s thoughts than detailing the fight on purpose? Maybe. Is it actually, finally an update to the main story? Yes, absolutely.

***

He tried to hide the broken rib, he really did. He wasn’t sure how Cain would react to an injury like this, he wasn’t sure if it would make him angry that Wren wouldn’t be able to fight again anytime soon, and now that he finally seemed to be getting on Cain’s good side he didn’t want to ruin it. He kept his complaints to himself, and thankfully the general wincing and whining through the day were chalked up to normal post-fight pain.

 Zander seemed worried about him that night, after he’d woken up from sleeping the whole day. He already seemed to be doing better and Wren was relieved to see that, glad that he could be somewhat of a help to him. He’d woken up in time for dinner, Cain was in a good enough mood to feed both of them that night, and though he kept giving Wren these worried glances he didn’t say anything, both of them trying to keep Cain in a good mood. By now he knew to wait until he was told to eat, but even after Cain said okay he just stared tiredly at his food. He felt like even moving to eat would be too much at this point, hand clutching his side as the pain was strong enough to dull any hunger. 

 “What’s the matter, pup? Not hungry?” Cain asked when he’d finished his food and noticed Wren still hadn’t eaten. 

 “I think he’s hurt.” Zander said, and Cain rolled his eyes.

 “Of course he’s hurt, did you see what that girl did to him yesterday?” He paused before saying, “Well, probably not, you were in and out of it the whole time.” He laughed as he knelt down in front of Wren, pushing his plate of food to the side and grabbing his face, forcing him to look up at him tiredly. “What’s the matter?” He asked again.

 “I, um… m’ ribs hurt a lot…” he mumbled, keeping his eyes on the floor. Cain frowned and pulled his hand away from his side, pushing his shirt up. There were dark bruises clustered around his ribs on the right side, both Cain and Zander made a face when they saw it. 

 “Shit, this is bad…” Cain murmured, using one hand to feel along his ribs. He pressed into the area that hurt most and Wren cried out, trying to jerk away.

 “It’s broken.” Zander said with a frown, leaning over to look closer. 

 “Why didn’t you say anything, I could’ve gotten you looked at before we left last night.” Cain said, scowling as he got to his feet. “Damn it, how long does it take ribs to heal?” He asked, looking to Zander. 

 “About six weeks. Took that long last time one of mine was broken anyway.” 

 “Fuck!” He groaned, running a hand through his hair. Wren was suddenly very, very anxious, six weeks was too long, and Cain was clearly unhappy. He’d finally been getting him in a good mood and just like that it was gone. “You’re going to be down for six weeks, do you fucking know how long that is?!” He snapped, and Wren flinched back, biting his lip as he wasn’t sure Cain wanted an answer or not. 

 “It’s not his fucking fault, shit happens when you’re forced to fight.” Zander said, glaring at him. 

 “Well now he’s useless, fucking useless for six weeks!” He raised his hand as if he was going to hit him, but Zander abruptly grabbed Wren’s arm, yanking him closer and away from Cain. The movement further disturbed his ribs and he squeezed his eyes shut, whining and pain.

 “Leave him alone.” Zander said, voice low and steady. 

 “Oh, so you’d like to be a guard dog now, mutt?” Cain sneered. “Since when do you get off on telling me what to do?” 

 “Just, listen, please… sir…” he sighed. “I’ll do it, while he’s recovering I’ll fight so you can get your entertainment in and he can be left alone.” 

 “No- really I’m fine I-“

 “You’re not fine, your ribs are fucking broken.” Zander hissed at him, and he quickly shut his mouth. 

 “Why should I even let you fight?” Cain rose an eyebrow. “You’ve been nothing but fucking useless too, I’m not going to tolerate any more fuck ups from you- one more time and I might finally let Vanessa have you for a lap dog.” Wren couldn’t ignore how Zander went tense at the threat, grip on his arm somewhat tighter.

 “I… I promise if you let me do this, I’ll win. I swear it, just, let me try, please?” Cain seemed to think it over for a moment before sighing.

 “Fine. Only because you know how fucking bored I get when you’re out of commission.” He said, and Zander visibly relaxed. “But,” Cain added, grabbing Wren by the hair and pulling him to his feet, “If you lose, then the little pup is going to have to take the punishment, understand?”

 “What?! But he’s supposed to be getting better, you can’t-“

 “Of course I can.” He grinned. “You seem to keep forgetting, Zander, I fucking own you. Both of you. I can, and will do whatever I fucking want, understand?” Zander scowled, glancing away.

 “Yes sir.” He said through gritted teeth. 

 “There’s a good dog.” He said, causing Zander to glare at him. “For the pup’s sake, I sure do hope you win your next fight.”

 Wren couldn’t help but hope desperately for that as well.

 ***

 It felt like it had been a while since he’d last been here, locked up in a cell trying to calm down enough to fight. Cain’s threat about Wren was making him more and more anxious but he tried to ignore it, he couldn’t afford to be anxious or nervous right now. He distracted himself by slowly pulling out his earrings, one by one, laying them on the cell floor. He’d learned early on it wasn’t good to leave them in, he already had one torn ear and he didn’t want it to happen again. 

 There was something unfortunately natural about being led into the ring. Even after a short break, even after several losses, it almost felt routine, were it not for Wren’s well being being used as a threat he probably wouldn’t have even been scared or nervous. He /knew/ what to do, had figured it out after his first couple fights. 

 As long as he stopped thinking like a person, stopped thinking of his opponent as a person, stopped thinking in general he would be fine. Focus on surviving no matter what he had to do to make sure that happened, fight dirty and vicious and desperate and he would be fine. It’s not like he was the only one, he’d come out of these things having been clawed at and bitten, and honestly, he never held it against his opponent. Just like him they wanted to survive, wanted to avoid their handler’s wrath, he couldn’t fault them for that. 

 He had promised Cain that he wouldn’t lose, really it was more of a promise to Wren, he was the one in actual danger here, but he was going to stick with it. He was taller than his opponent, the other man clearly was fed even less than he was, his owner must’ve been a dumb ass to think he was fit to fight. 

 He’d feel guilty later for thinking about how easy this should be, listening to the announcer count down from five, he knew that right now he needed to stop thinking at all, as the announcer reached “one” he focused on getting this man on the ground and getting the hell out of there. 

 He tuned out all the noise around him, forced himself to forget about Cain’s threat for the time being, and instead focused on getting his hands around this guy’s throat. Sometime later he could be horrified at how easy it was, about how he had no qualms about fighting to get a hold on him, about hitting him hard enough to stun him, grab him by the hair and roughly force him to the ground. He could be horrified about how easy it was to break someone’s rib if you stomped hard enough just enough times, and how it relieved him to feel the bone give, to hear the poor man scream in pain, and how he didn’t stop because he had him on the ground and he needed to just stay for ten seconds, and then this would be over.

 All he ever wanted was for it to be over quickly. 

 That level of cheering meant it was over, meant he could step back, get off the man who was gasping for air, panicked and pained. He hoped he’d be okay, wished he could offer some help or comfort but once the time was called he wasn’t supposed to touch him, people already coming to drag them out. He was vaguely aware of the fact that he escaped this one mostly unscathed, not uncommon for a quick fight. There’s a reason other dogs panicked at the sight of him, but he didn’t really like to think about that. Right now he didn’t really want to think at all though. 

 He more or less collapsed once he was locked up in that cell again, adrenaline finally leaving him, a wave of exhaustion and relief taking over. He was used to that part too, he was lucky it was already late, a good excuse to crash completely once they returned home. He had won, he wasn’t in any trouble, and most importantly Wren wasn’t in any trouble. He hoped he was doing okay right now, hoped that Vanessa wasn’t harassing him too much. Cain was probably in a good mood, he’d be thrilled when he finally came for Zander, too preoccupied with the rest of the fights for now. He didn’t particularly mind, a brief break sounded amazing right now.

 As expected Cain was happy to see him when he finally picked him up- he couldn’t actually remember the last time Cain was happy to see him. It was better than anger though, he was ready to accept this, accept praise and- a reward. He hadn’t even thought about that, about what he could possibly want or need. As of right now, he just wanted to see Wren, the poor kid had been dragged along despite the obvious pain and discomfort. Cain had left him with Vanessa while he came to get him, they returned to Vanessa not so subtly feeling along his ribs, trying to find the broken one, ignoring how he tried to pull away as much as she would let him. 

 He was relieved to see him, but what he hadn’t expected was the look he gave him, blue eyes wide as soon as Cain brought him over. It was a look he hadn’t seen since Wren had first been bought, he was scared, stepping away when Zander got close. It hurt, he felt it immediately in the pit of his stomach, that sense of dread that just another person feared him. Somehow though, it felt so much worse that it was Wren of all people. Suddenly, he was dreading being locked into a room with him.

 “I knew you could still fight!” Cain had laughed on the car ride home. He tried to tune him out but it was hard. “If you could do that all the time, I’d never have had to get Wren!” Zander didn’t like the sound of that, and from the way his eyes widened neither did Wren, the idea he may get rid of him clearly scared them both. Cain didn’t notice though, continuing to ramble on. “I guess you just needed the right motivation, huh? If you keep that up maybe I can start switching you and the pup out, once he recovers anyway.”

 He could live with that, taking turns. It at least gave them both a chance to rest, which was certainly more than he’d had before, only given a break once Wren proved to be better. Until then though, he’d have to make sure he was careful, make sure he did better than he ever had before. Wren was already hurt, he couldn’t stand if it got worse because he fucked up. 

 So long as he fought well, Wren would be fine, and even if he was scared of him after watching that, him being fine was really all that mattered.

[bloodfromthethorn]

Suddenly Worse

For the first time in what has to have been months, Mac and Jack are both walking away from a mission unharmed. That's got to be worth celebrating.

Part ten of the July of Whump 2021 prompt challenge.

Also on AO3. 

..

“Jack, I’m fine. Stop fussing.”

“Hey, I’m not the one who thought it would be a good idea to fall out of a moving car. You do stupid shit like that, you’re gonna have to put up with me checking you over.”

Mac rolled his eyes, batting away the hand that was coming up to feel the temperature of his forehead yet again. “You did check me over. Twice. And I didn’t even complain about it so honestly, I think I’ve done my time.”

His partner huffed, unsatisfied but momentarily diverted. “What are you talking about? You bitched the whole time.”

“Well, yeah, but if I hadn’t you’d have thought something was wrong.”

That was… not untrue. Jack scowled at him. “Maybe I wouldn’t have to be so pushy if you’d just tell me when there’s something I need to worry about.”

Despite the seriousness in his partner’s eyes, Mac couldn’t help the laugh that escaped him. “I do! The only reason you think I don’t is because you imagine I’m always half a step away from death’s door when the worst I’ve got going on is a cold.”

“Yeah? You sure about that?”

Mac squinted at him, trying to work out if he’d just fallen into a trap before a memory suddenly struck him like lightning. “Tallinn doesn’t count.”

“Tallinn one hundred percent counts!”

“There were extenuating circumstances. And I was fine in the end, so it didn’t matter.”

“You got shot!”

“It was a graze, and barely that. Even Nikki said you were being overprotective.”

It was Jack’s turn to roll his eyes. “Nikki always took your side, that doesn’t count.”

“But I was fine though. Remember? Don’t even have a scar anymore. You nearly got yourself killed because you were too busy worrying about me, and there was no need for it.”

Jack had a return shot already lined up, but something in Mac’s eyes had gone soft and sad, and Jack had never been able to stand up to that. For all he made a big deal of worrying about Mac’s safety, it was a two-way street and Jack could admit he wasn’t always as careful with his own life as his partner would like him to be. Typically, they kept each other in line, but they both had moments when they faltered.

“Yeah, okay, I might have gone a little overboard that time,” he admitted gently, “But my point stands. You got shot and you didn’t think it worth mentioning! You’ve gotta forgive me if I don’t entirely take your word for it when you say you’re fine.”

“Which is why I let you check me over,” Mac agreed placidly, “And you saw that the worse injury I have is an incredibly minor bruise on my shoulder. I promise you Jack, I’m alright.”

The words seemed to be what Jack needed to finally be mollified, because he backed off from where he’d been crowding Mac into his own sofa and, with a final measuring look, headed for the fridge. He still didn’t look happy about it, but at least Mac could relax back without feeling like he was under a microscope for the first time in several hours.

It also, conveniently, gave him the perfect opportunity to keep a keen eye on Jack as he pottered about the kitchen. It felt a little hypocritical, given how long he’d just spent getting on at Jack for hovering, but in Mac’s defence, he hadn’t had the chance to check his partner for injuries and he wasn’t wholly convinced something hadn’t happened that he didn’t know about. Jack looked and was acting completely normal, but there’d been a solid ten minutes after Mac had fallen out of the car when they were separated, and he wanted to be certain he hadn’t missed anything important. Besides, for all Jack gave him shit about not owning up to injuries, he was a thousand times worse.

“I can feel you watching me hoss. See something you like?”

Mac pulled a face. “Gross.”

His partner turned to shoot him a dry look. How he’d known Mac was watching when he wasn’t even looking in his direction was beyond him. “I thought you just got done telling me I worry too much.”

“You do.”

“Mhmm. And what exactly would you call this, slick?”

A pause. “Reasonable expression of concern?”

Jack snorted. “Sure it is.”

“I didn’t see what happened after we got split up. Matty said something about a car crash.” He let a sliver of accusation slide into his tone.

“’After we got split up,’” he repeated mockingly. “You mean ‘after you fell out of a moving car’, and I’m pretty sure that disqualifies you from making judgements about my health right now.”

“Jack.” His voice was plaintive.

Jack crumbled like a house of cards. “I’m fine, Mac. Promise. There was a minor car crash that I may or may not have been involved in, but I was wearing my belt and we weren’t even going fast by that point. I walked away without a scratch.”

“You sure?”

“Positive.”

Mac eyed him critically, so Jack stepped out from behind the counter and spread his arms, letting Mac look. In his defence, he really did seem okay, but for a slight scuff at his hairline that was so minor neither of them even slightly bothered to acknowledge it. After a long moment, Mac felt himself nodding slowly. “Okay.”

Jack shot him a wry grin. “Told you.” He returned to the couch with a beer in either hand, offering one to his friend before cracking open his own and taking a long, relieved swig. “Ahh, it feels good to be home.”

..

Even with the rare phenomenon of arriving home uninjured, the pair of them were both too tired to get up to much more than vegging out on the couch with a few beers and a movie. It was nice all the same, just relaxing and chatting amiably. They’d both been on the go pretty much constantly for weeks, so it was a relief to just kick back and relax.

Somewhat guiltily, Mac was also quietly pleased that they got to have this time as just the two of them; he’d loved Bozer like a brother since he was a kid and Riley had become his family just as much as everyone else in a scarily short amount of time, but there was a certain amount of nostalgia in hanging out just with Jack. It had been just the two of them in the Sandbox and while he wasn’t exactly fond of his memories of the desert, it had been the setting for forging one of the most meaningful relationships of his life. Spending the night as just the two of them was oddly comforting.

As the hour grew later, their conversation started trailing off slowly, weariness tugging them down. Jack in particular seemed to be having tremendous trouble keeping his eyes open.

“It’s 'cause you’re getting old,” Mac told him with a snort. He got a swat on the arm for his trouble.

“’Old’, he says. I’ll show you old the next time we spar.”

Mac frowned softly; there was the slightest slur in Jack’s voice and they hadn’t had nearly enough beer for that. It could be fatigue, obviously, but a feeling he tended to think of as instinct picked up its head and started taking notice.

“Hey, Jack, you feeling okay?”

“Mmm?” Jack blinked at him lazily. “Yeah? We’ve been over this.”

His own tiredness fading away as his adrenaline spiked, Mac sat up to properly look him over. Dull, glazed eyes tracked his movement. “You sure about that? You’re not looking so good.”

He wasn’t – he was covered in a fine sheen of sweat, and his skin looked abnormally pale under the dim lamplight. Mac hadn’t noticed in the gloom, but now that he was properly paying attention, Jack was really starting to look awful. On instinct he snatched at Jack’s wrist, wincing at the beat racing beneath his fingertips.

“Mac,” Jack protested faintly, “’M fine. Stop worryin’.”

It was possibly the least convincing lie Mac had ever heard. His mind raced over the possibilities: lethargy, sweaty skin, and a rapid pulse weren’t exactly unique symptoms. Flicking on another lamp to give himself more light to work with, he pinched the tip of one of Jack’s fingers and watched as the colour slowly returned to it.

“Well,” he said as lightly as he could, “We can add low blood pressure to the mix.”

“Low w-ah?” Jack’s eyes were almost completely closed. Looking at him now, slumped into the cushions and so pale it was frightening, Mac couldn’t understand how he had ever thought the man was just tired. He was supposed to be his goddamn partner and he hadn’t seen this when Jack was two feet in front of him?

But there would be time for recriminations later. Right now, he needed to get Jack help and he needed to do it now.

“Hey, Jack, stay with me, okay? Can you stay awake?”

“’M tired Mac.”

“I know you are big guy, but I need you to talk to me, alright?”

“’Bout what?”

“Whatever you want.”

“Mmkay.” Nothing else followed after, and Mac’s heart sank right through the base of his stomach and kept going. He snatched his phone of the coffee table and dialled the Phoenix’s medical emergency SOS number. That should bring a paramedic crew running.

Lethargy, sweaty skin, pale, increased pulse, low blood pressure… He mentally worked his way through a first aid manual, but there were too many things those symptoms applied to. Okay, well then – if symptoms weren’t enough, what about circumstance? Jack had been fine earlier and all he’d done since then was drink a few beers. That left poisoning as an option, but the beers had been sealed and Mac felt fine, so it didn’t feel likely; a better option was probably a delayed onset of symptoms.

Jack had been in a fistfight that morning but he’d walked away with grazed knuckles and nothing else – Mac had been sure to check him over immediately after, so he was sure on that count. That left the car accident that he clearly hadn’t asked enough questions about.

“Jack? You still awake?” There was a faint hum in response. “Can you tell me if you’re in pain? Does your stomach hurt?”

He was pulling up Jack’s t-shirt before he got a response, noting the expected bruising over his shoulder from the seatbelt, right alongside the telltale bruising around his navel he’d prayed he wouldn’t see.

“Mm,” Jack agreed faintly. “Itches.”

“Shit,” Mac cursed sharply, wishing he’d had the sense to press Jack for a more thorough answer when he’d asked him about the car crash. Instead, he’d taken his word for it and then spent several hours sitting on a couch beside a man slowly bleeding to death. Way to fucking go. “Okay Jack, I think you’re bleeding internally. I’m going to get you to a hospital, but I need you to stay awake. C’mon man, don’t leave me hanging.”

The phone he’d dropped back onto the table started buzzing sharply, Matty’s face staring up at him. He batted at the answer button with one hand, carefully feeling for Jack’s pulse again with the other.

“Why has an emergency call just gone up from your house Blondie?” She was evidently trying to sound annoyed at the late-night interruption, but the worry in her voice was plain to anyone who knew her.

“Matty, it’s Jack. Something’s wrong – I think it’s internal bleeding. He’s got all the symptoms of someone going into shock and if I’m right, he’s been bleeding for hours. I need an ambulance here right now.”

Even barely conscious, Jack seemed to stir to life at the audible distress in Mac’s voice because he blinked at him, flopping a limp hand to grip at Mac’s wrist weakly. Mac felt a little bit like crying.

“One’s on its way,” Matty reported sharply, falling into her usual role of command. “I’ll get our techs to clear the roads for you as best they can, should give you a clear run to Cedars. ETA four minutes.”

“Thanks Matty.”

“How’s he doing?”

“Hanging in there,” he said with more hope than he really felt. Jack was still semi-conscious, but he’d deteriorated from talking normally and drinking a beer to a slurring, barely responsive mess inside of half an hour and Mac had no idea how long Jack could keep this up. For all his head was full of medical knowledge and equations and anatomy diagrams, none of that would do him the slightest bit of good when it came to trying to stem internal bleeding. The best he could do was delay things for a little while. “Okay Jack,” he murmured, mostly to himself, “We need to get you lying down. This might hurt big guy. I’m sorry.”

From the groan Jack let loose when Mac carefully pulled him down to lie flat on the sofa, it did more than just hurt, but there was nothing to be done about it. He’d already lost far too much blood and keeping him upright was just making it harder for his brain to get what it needed. As soon as he was settled, Mac grabbed the free cushions and jammed them under Jack’s feet.

“Mac?” Matty’s voice felt tinny and far away.

“Yeah, still here,” he said, unnecessarily. “Just, uh. Just getting him lying down and elevating his legs. Make things easier on his heart and conserve blood flow for his vital organs.”

She let out a sound that might have been a laugh if there had been any amusement in it. “I’ve done first aid too Blondie. I trust you. I’m asking if you’re okay.”

He paused fractionally to frown at the phone. “What? I’m fine.”

“You don’t sound fine.”

Her words tickled something in the back of his head and he froze for a moment to take stock of himself. He was breathing heavily, he noted in surprise, and his body was shuddering with very fine tremors. His hands were as steady as they always were, but it dawned on him that that was only because it was a practiced response to stress, something he’d conditioned himself for and had to actively control. With everything else going on in his head, he hadn’t even realised he’d been doing it.

Panic, he realised suddenly. He was panicking.

He sucked in a sharp, forceful breath, and held it. Matty was right: he was not fine.

“What’s the ETA on that ambulance?” He asked instead of admitting to it. Now that he was listening, he could hear the slight catch in his voice.

“One minute.”

“Okay. We can manage that.”

“It’s going to be okay Mac. I’ve made sure the paramedics know what to expect, and they’ve been brought up to date on his medical history and condition. I just need you to keep it together for me.”

He nodded, then belatedly realised she couldn’t see him. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m good, I’m here.”

“I know you are.” She sounded like she was smiling. “There’s no one else in the world who could take better care of Jack than you can. Just hang in there.”

Now was probably not the time to tell her just how badly he’d failed in his job to keep an eye on Jack. That conversation could come later, once he was sure that Jack was going to be okay and he’d been able to speak with the man himself. He was the one owed an apology, after all.

Instead, he just muttered an agreement and waited with bated breath for the medics to arrive.

..

Jack stirred to the depressingly familiar burning under his skin that meant he’d had a blood transfusion in the very recent past. Mac had always scoffed at him when he’d said he could feel it, like an imposter in his veins, but it was the god’s honest truth and he recognised it now. Which was kind of strange, considering the last thing he could remember was hanging out on Mac’s sofa with a beer and absolutely no cares in the world. If he couldn’t remember an injury, then maybe something had happened…

Maybe Mac was in trouble.

A hefty dose of adrenaline was dumped directly into his bloodstream with the thought, and his eyes popped open. The light seared his retinas something fierce, but that wasn’t as important as finding out where his partner was and making sure that he was okay.

Fortunately, a series of rapid blinks immediately revealed the solution. Mac was sitting beside him, folded uncomfortably into a too-small hospital chair with his head propped up on his fist as he dozed. He looked- well, awful, honestly, but unhurt. The fluorescent overhead lights washed out his already pale skin and the bags under his eyes were dark enough to look like bruises. Even in sleep, his forehead was creased with worry.

“Mac?” He called softly, not really wanting to disturb his sleep since he so clearly needed it but also knowing that if he slept like that he’d regret it in the morning.

His partner jolted awake in an instant, casting about wildly until his eyes landed on Jack. Visible relief washed over him. “Hey big guy,” he said equally quietly. “You feeling okay?”

Jack pointed with his eyes to the IV at the crook of his elbow. “Transfusion?”

“Yeah.” Mac sighed heavily, running a hand over his face in a futile attempt at waking himself up. “Turns out that you didn’t walk away from that car crash as unscathed as you thought you did.”

That… didn’t make sense. He frowned until Mac elaborated.

“You tore your spleen. Not much, just a little nick really, but it bled pretty heavily. You went into shock.”

Jack digested that slowly, suddenly recognising the deep, blunted ache in his abdomen that he had come to associate with surgery. Mac’s story made sense, but he couldn’t help but feel like it was missing a whole load of steps, particularly given the haunted look lingering in his partner’s eyes. He’d evidently missed something important while he’d been out.

“You okay?”

He scoffed. “Yeah, Jack. I’m fine. You’re the one who just got out of surgery.” He paused, then added as an afterthought, “You still have a spleen by the way. The damage was minor enough they were able to patch it without going to the hassle of a splenectomy.”

“Didn’t answer my question.”

“Yes, I did. I’m not hurt, remember? We went over this.” He looked faintly annoyed, and Jack had a sneaky feeling that it wasn’t aimed at him.

A lot of things came together in Jack’s head very quickly. He’d always been good at figuring out what was going on in the kid’s head, even when he didn’t understand it in the slightest. “Hey. It wasn’t your fault man. You hear me? Whatever you’re blaming yourself for right now? Wasn’t your fault.”

Mac’s eyes darted away, his hands coming together to pick at his cuticles. Gotcha.

A sniper to the core, Jack just waited him out. Mac had never been very good at long silences. “I should have noticed something was up. You were bleeding – dying – and I was just sitting right there not doing anything about it. I didn’t even realise something was wrong until you went into shock.”

“I didn’t notice anything either,” he pointed out calmly. It was true; he’d felt a little nauseous and tired, but he’d put both down to needing a good night’s rest. He hadn’t been lying when he’d told Mac he thought he was good.

“You were going into shock. You were barely conscious.”

“Hey, I was conscious plenty. It was, what? Six hours between that crash and me going cross-eyed? In all that time, I didn’t feel a thing.”

“You wouldn’t have done,” Mac said quietly, falling back on his usual need to explain. “The blood pooled in your abdomen. It’s a mild irritant but otherwise, you wouldn’t know it was there unless you specifically went looking for it. I should have been looking for it.”

“You were, remember? I’m the one who told you I was fine.”

“And I shouldn’t have listened!” It was the first time his voice slipped from the quiet control he’d evidently been clinging to, and suddenly Jack could see desperation and guilt staring back at him. “If it had been me, you wouldn’t have listened. You didn’t listen – you insisted on checking me over to make sure that I was okay even when I told you I was. But I just took your word for it and then didn’t pay enough attention until you were half-dead!”

“Mac. Listen to me.” He kept his voice low and level, praying that his partner would hear his sincerity. “This was not your fault. You didn’t notice anything was wrong because I told you it wasn’t and you trusted me. That’s not a failing. And besides, I’m guessing I’m only here now because you figured it out in time to get me to help. You didn’t fail me Mac, you saved me.”

“I-” He faltered, his eyes reddening as too many emotions crowded in at once. “It was so close Jack.”

And no doubt it had been made worse by the otherwise innocuous setting it had taken place in. His heart went out to him. “I know man. I’m sorry for that. Really. But you can’t blame yourself. Promise me, man.”

Mac looked at him for a long time, a single tear escaping his iron grip to run down his cheek. He brushed it away angrily, fighting to get himself under control. Jack let him work through it in silence, attuned to every shift and expression. Eventually, the storm clouds on Mac’s brow started to recede, leaving behind an exhausted and guilty, but balanced, partner behind. It wasn’t perfect, and they’d definitely be having this conversation again, but it was a kind of peace and that would have to be enough for now.

“The next time you get in a car accident I’m taking you to a hospital,” he said firmly.

Jack snorted, then winced. “Okay. Deal. Just the once though.”

“Not a chance.”

“C’mon man, I’m fine! Look at me, never been better.”

“That’s not funny.”

“It’s a little funny.”

“Your face is funny.”

“Oh wow. MIT brain and you came up with that zinger. Honestly, I’m impressed.”

“Hey, now, cut me some slack. Some of us haven’t spent the last five hours getting in our beauty sleep.”

“Evidently.”

“Hey.”

[expelliarmusmyass]

the potter twins, a series

a/u // no voldemort, slytherin!fem!reader

warnings // light cursing, mentions of fighting, anxiety disorder, anxiety attack depiction

series summary // y/n and harry potter are twins where the world doesn't feel wide enough for the both of them.

chapter summary // y/n and harry are forced to have dinner with the malfoys.

a/n // haii peeps so this is officially my first fic and i wanted to let y'all know that it has been very poorly edited so if there are grammar/spelling mistakes, i'm vv sorry !! this chapter was mainly setting up the story for the upcoming chapters so just expect more angst as the fic goes on :)

tag list: @whitewineandpizzapuffs

"okay, i know it looks bad," was all harry could muster out without laughing. "but on the bright side, it could be worse, y/n." he continued. harry had dim-wittedly opened a package from fred and george's joke shop he received in your room without your permission and without taking any proper damage control precautions. y/n liked keeping her room in somewhat of a clean fashion, sure, maybe to some people it looked unclean or a mess as others would put it, but it was a fairly organized mess. you could tell y/n tried.

but harry's idiotic self decided that his twin sister's room was the best place to open a mystery box the weasley twins had sent, the possible factor they might have sent something explosive or colorful completely blowing over his head. harry tore through the brown parcel and opened the box without thinking and explosions of colorful powders and assortments of what might have been fireworks flew out of the box, causing harry to drop it on the wood floor. a loud thud sounded and your head shot up, watching your brother shocked and partially scared expression making you laugh.

but the powders and fireworks flew around your room, knocking everything over and staining your sheets and carpets. after about thirty seconds, it had finally stopped and you let out a relieved sigh.

"heavens, harry, if i still didn't have the trace on me, you'd be blasted out of the side of my wall. help me clean this up right now and maybe i won't dye all of your whites bright pink with a red sock next time i do laundry." y/n said sternly, finally getting up from your bed to face your brother. he laughed quietly and the pair spent the next few minutes picking up what they could , y/n looking rather disappointed when she found a her last batch of laundry covered in pink and blue pigment. harry walked over to y/n's bed and pointed out the green and purple all over her white sheets.

"well, at least now you have an excuse to give to mum when you ask her for those new beddings you've been wanting," harry joked, turning to you to see your reaction. he honestly didn't know if you'd be mad at him for cracking jokes right now or be willing to laugh it off. you chose the latter.

"yeah, i guess you're right." y/n chuckled lightly. nothing important had broken, and you knew the weasley twins wouldn't have put pigment in there to stain anything permanently, so there wasn't a reason to be too mad. plus, y/n always was a fan of jokes and would typically never take them too personally. you were known for being able to take a joke, and you got along with everyone you met easily. it was sort of a knack you had, being naturally good with not only people, but most living things. you did very well in herbology and were exceptionally compatible with creatures of any sort. hagrid trusted you with any creatures he had and you visited frequently to take short trips to the forbidden forest to feed and take care of other animals and such. you sympathized with neglected creatures and were a great second mother to anything you met.

harry started walking towards the door as you both had finished cleaning up what you could, and he quickly turned around to tell you something your parents had sent him to come up to say. "sirius, remus, and peter are coming for dinner and mum and dad told me to tell you to wear something nice. apparently we all started caring about our appearances in front of family we see nearly every day, but mum insisted." harry's eyes were trying extremely hard not to roll to the back of his head, you knowing how much he despised wearing formal clothing.

"are you serious? okay, when she said that, did it sound like she wanted me to wear like, clean jeans, or," you paused while trying to hide the disgusted expression creeping up on you, "a dress?" you finally said, unable to control the sour face your muscles were contracting to make. you hated wearing dresses. something about them just made you hate the way you looked. it didn't feel like you. you begged your parents more often than not whenever you went out to just let you wear anything else, but you almost never won that argument.

harry only let out a sigh through a smile. "they're making me wear a tie. you take a guess." you let out an exasperated groan and dramatically dropped onto your bed. "dad said he would give you five galleons if you did it." you sat up in your spot and darted your eyes to him and shot him a glance as if to say really?? to which he replied with a nod.

"fine," you said after a short moment of thought. "but i'm not going to enjoy it one bit." he gave you a sarcastic smile, walked out your door, gently shutting it on his way out. you turned to scream into your pillow, but it was covered in yellow powder from fred and george's box, and you had just showered, so why ruin that?

you walked over to your closet a few feet from your bed, past the sofa chair your slytherin robes had been thrown on. you were sorted into slytherin in your first year, being separated from harry for the first time in eleven years, insecure about being in the house of mean, vicious people as others had described it. harry was quite shocked at first, but saw your anxiety and got over it as quickly as he could manage. you and harry still did almost everything together in your first year and became close friends with the weasleys and hermione. your parents were immensely proud of their son being sorted into the same house as them, and hardly did anything to cover it up. it sometimes felt as if your whole purpose in life was to be a gryffindor alongside your family, but you were in slytherin no less, feeling like a disappointment to everyone you grew up with. while your parents may not have been as enthusiastic of your sorting, sirius, remus, and peter could not have been more supportive. you felt better about your house after being able to talk to them about it, sirius knowing what it felt like to betray what you thought was your destined life.

you turned to see the pile of unopened letters that were delivered to you this morning by hedwig. you had an owl of your own, with dark brown, almost black feathers, currently unnamed, that you found in an alley with part of his wing severed and you took him home to help him, your father scared and mother quite proud of your instinct to take care of a harmed animal. he eventually took a liking to you, and your brother for that matter, and became your owl after that. he was still working on his flying skills, but he had improved massively all things considered. you looked back at the untapped letters and immediately promised yourself you would open them in the morning.

you snapped out of whatever trance you were in and kept walking to your closet, now only five steps away and opened it, looking for a dress to wear. your mother always urged you to keep your eye out for dresses, since she knew you would never voluntarily buy one, she always made sure you told her which ones you liked so she wouldn't get you something you didn't. she was the one that always brought home dresses in your size and ones you liked so that wearing them wasn't as bad as it already was. you settled on a slip dress patterned with constellations that went just to your knees. this was probably the one you liked the best. it hugged you in all the right places and you thought you didn't look that bad in it. you slipped on some black, worn converse so at least something wasn't uncomfortable the whole night. if you couldn't control the dress, at least you could control the shoes.

you faced your mirror, brushing out your hair that had been up in an effortless bun all day, and put in some earring your father had gifted to you for your birthday last year. you took a deep breath and finally worked up the nerve to walk out your door to the new, talking voices in your house you could only guess were your guests. as soon as you saw your uncles, you immediately felt relieved and rushed down the stairs to greet them. you pushed past harry, ignoring his annoyed comments along the lines of "you really don't have to push" or "that hurt and you know it, y/n," you honestly weren't paying attention enough and were to busy hugging the three men that had walked through the door.

"there's my favorite gryffindor and slytherin" remus said, after hugging the two of you. both your father and sirius shot him dramatic looks of shock and offense, surely they were remus's favorite gryffindor's, but remus shooed them away and gave them you two are really doing this right now? looks. you and harry laughed, while your mother had to hold back your father from slapping remus right across the face. you noticed sirius, remus, and peter as well as your father were all wearing suits of different colors, remus in a maroon one, sirius in a pinstripe black one, your father in a deep, navy blue one and peter in a flattering dark green suit. your mother wore a beautiful navy dress to match your father, and you finally couldn't keep it in any longer.

"will someone please explain to me why everyone is wearing nice clothes? last time i checked, i was allowed to wear sweatpants while enjoying dinner in the comfort of my own home." you said, confused, and very over your dress after being in it maybe five minutes. harry agreed with you and turned to your mother, a questioning look in his eyes.

peter gave your parents a concerned look. "james, lily? you seriously haven't told them yet?"

"told us what, exactly?" harry said through raised eyebrows, turning to my father.

lily finally worked up the courage to say something since apparently your father couldn't. "y/n, harry, we're not eating at home." you looked at them, unsatisfied with the answer your mother had just given you.

"so, what, we're getting food at a restaurant, i still don't see why you want me to wear a dress and harry a tie." you questioned, still gravely confused.

sirius stiffened a little, and after a while, finally said, "james, if you won't tell them, i will."

"tell us what, dad?" harry asked.

james stiffened and let out an exasperated sigh. "okay, uh, here we go." he seemed the most uncomfortable he'd ever been until lily grabbed his hand to let him know he wasn't alone and she was right there. he looked over at her calm face and instantly relaxed. "we're having dinner with some people at the ministry."

harry still wasn't fully convinced that was all it was. "if we're just having dinner with some people at the ministry, why is peter looking like he might piss himself from pure fear?" you turned to take a quick glance over at peter, who was aggressively trying to hide his shaking, thin body. james finally gave up trying to ease his children into what he was about to say.

"the malfoy's. we are having dinner at the malfoy's." both harry and y/n started shouting protests, most in between the categories of "WHAT IN MERLINS NAME ARE YOU THINKING YOU MUST BE BLOODY JOKING" and "I REFUSE TO GO YOU CANNOT MAKE ME DO THIS", with the occasional "YOU MUST BE NEW HERE".

lily finally snapped and sternly said, "i don't want to hear anything else out of the two of you. i raised you to be better than this. you can and will be better than this."

the next thing you and harry knew, you were standing outside the malfoy manor, the breeze barely blowing in the mid july air. your parents and co. were a few feet in front of you, waiting for the door to open up to let them inside the dark house. you and harry quickly looked over with each other and had a two second conversation with your eyes. wonder twin power, as dad called it.

harry did nothing to hide his annoyance. we are not doing this, y/n.

you looked back at him, begging for him to show some sign of maturity. you were going into your fourth year, after all. come on harry, i don't want to do this any more than you do.

great! i don't see the issue here.

look at them, harry. they want us to try. can we just try?

no. not with malfoy. come on, y/n it's malfoy, for merlin's sake.

harry, stop being a baby. if you can't be the bigger person here, at least pretend like you're not going to strangle him when we walk into that door.

harry finally dropped it, and nodded, letting you know he wouldn't drop kick malfoy. at least immediately.

the ten foot oak door opened wide with narcissa and lucious malfoy there to welcome the guests into their house. draco walked into the room, the most unenthusiastic smile plastered across his face as he eyed you and your brother. he looked at you with less hatred than he did your brother. you had to take a step in front of harry to stop him from launching himself at the blonde haired twig, and grabbed his hand without thinking. he looked back at you confused, but found his sister's hand in his calming and comforting. he relaxed a small bit after that, but kept his guard up in case the family of rats decided to pull anything with his family, especially his sister.

"hello, draco." you said after a minute of silence between the three of you, the adults still involved in meaningless conversation.

he replied only with an obnoxiously fake smile, and turned to your brother, who was still clutching your hand.

"you know, potter's, my parents say this dinner is going to be the joining of the two of our families. wouldn't be a bad idea. your parents certainly need the help." harry was about the jump on the tall boy and let go of your hand but you refused to get in trouble this early into the night and grabbed his wrist, making him turn to face you.

"hey," you muttered under your breath only loud enough for him to hear, "calm down. you can do this." you rethought what you had just said. "okay, just, give it a minute." he relaxed his tense shoulders and looked back at draco with a convincing, small smile.

"thanks for the insight, malfoy." harry dryly responded.

draco returned him that stupid smirk he always had. merlin, he annoyed harry. "i'm just saying, your parents could work so high up in the ministry if they had the help of mine. the money you'd make. surely, neither of you haven't seen more than a hundred galleons at a time." draco laughed at his own rude, ignorant joke while harry waited for you to loosen your grip on his wrist and prepared to tackle draco with his entire body weight behind him. this time, you had to get across to your brother in a harsher way or the both of you would end up grounded for two weeks.

"harry! stop it!" you pleaded loud enough for draco to hear. sometimes, you hated draco so much and you would love nothing more than to see your brother beat the living shit out of him, but you knew there was no way you would hear the end of it from your mother if you let harry hurt someone.

harry pulled you away from the blonde git, still giggling like a four-year-old at his own stupid joke, and stood in front of you, forcing his hands out of yours. "why can't i hit him? just one, really, really good one? not one? once, okay?" you looked at him angrily.

"come on, harry. at least wait until you have a justifiable reason to hit him." he looked at you, convinced you were rethinking the words you just said after the conversation you just had. "okay, you know what i meant. please promise me you'll at least try to act like someone with half a brain and don't go jumping stupid blondes who just don't have it in them to shut their mouths." harry wanted to roll his eyes at your insistence of not beating up the one person he thought you two could not stand, but he laughed at your snide comment. he liked having a funny sister.

he took a deep breath and you both entered the dining room where the adults and draco were gathering to sit around a deep brown, wood table. you watched as the seats filled up and, against your will, you sat in between harry and draco, in some attempt to separate them. lucius sat at the head of the table, your father on the opposite head, harry on his left and your mother on his right. you sat next to harry and draco directly to your left and his mother beside him. remus, sirius, and peter all sat across from you, sirius directly next to lucious (protective measures, you thought) and remus next to lily. peter looked utterly terrified, but felt safer in between two very capable wizards. a plate of salad was placed cleanly and neatly in front of every guest, but no one seem inclined to eat right away. finally, your mum took a bite of a salad, eyes widening slightly as she went in for another bite.

"this salad is delicious, narcissa." narcissa nodded her head in thanks and tasted it herself. sirius and remus started to help themselves to their plate, clearly hungry but not wanting to be rude. draco didn't touch anything, nor did harry, still eyeing draco, making sure he didn't do anything to his sister, sitting quite literally six inches away from him. you ate your food quietly, nodding along with the boring conversation about ministry business and such. you continued dinner, unable to stand the dreadful conversation that seemed to engulf the adults around you. you stole some quick glances from a clearly uninterested draco, and found yourself being able to have your eye conversations with harry most of the night. it kept harry from having to think of thirty different ways to murder malfoy and make it seem like an accident. although it didn't mean you couldn't.

dinner dragged on, and you had finally mustered up the courage to ask where the nearest bathroom was. you got up from the table and walked down the hall to the extravagant bathroom that had no business being as expensive as it seemed.

as you made your way back, you discovered everyone had gotten up from the table and moved into the sitting room a few doors away.

you saw a pair of glass doors leading outside to a beautiful garden you couldn't help but want to sit in. you need the peace and the quiet. this was a lot.

there were many things in the world you liked doing. at the top of the list, it might be something along the lines of making people laugh, playing quidditch with your family and uncles, making friends with both people and magical creatures. but the first thing on that list, the one thing you loved most in the world, was sitting alone and observing. you felt the most yourself when you didn't have to say or do anything for anyone. after a while, you would get exhausted being around too many people, and being the only one in your family to have clinical anxiety wasn't helpful. harry didn't really understand why you felt so nervous to do so many ordinary, every day things, but he supported you anyway and taught himself how to be helpful should an anxiety attack present itself. your mother and father on the other hand, felt guilty, thinking that your anxiety was something that was their fault. you tried for years to explain to them that it was nothing they did and they pretended to understand, but were terrible at hiding it and you and harry both knew they were lying every time you told them not to worry and they replied with "i know's" and "we wont's." being alone allowed you to let go of everything that seemed to bother you, even for a short second. it was nice. freeing, almost.

you pushed open the glass doors, not forgetting to shut them gently and completely, and made your way through a knee high maze of flower beds and magical plants. the sun had just begun to set, the sky a piercing orange with scattered streaks of red, not a cloud in sight. it's perfect, you thought to yourself. absolutely perfect. there was something about a cloudless sky that made your heart melt. you walked through the fairly large maze, recognizing a handful of plants and not hesitating to tend to plants in need of weeding. you heard a few footsteps from behind as you were weeding a bed of flowers, your hands covered in dirt and soot, a pile of weeds you picked to your right.

harry crouched down beside you, watching sweat dripping down the side of your forehead, heavily concentrated on getting rid of the numerous weeds growing all over this beautiful garden. harry couldn't help but let out a laugh.

"y/n, really? now you're weeding their garden?" harry mocked.

you turned to face him, drops of sweat trickling down your cheeks now. "shut it." you said, amused. you stood up and both you and harry made your way over to a fountain a few steps from where you two had just been. you rinsed your hands and splashed your face, harry leaning against the fountain, looking off into the direction of the sun. he finally understood why you liked going outside as the sun set so much, it really was beautiful.

"what'd i miss inside? i got a bit carried away weeding out here, it's just calm today. needed to get away and get my mind away from whatever that train wreck was." harry dissolved into giggles at your taunting remark.

"you didn't miss anything worth watching. just malfoy being an ass. i am lucky i have you to restrain me from smacking the guy right atop the head every time i see him. although i can't blame him completely, have you met lucius?" you liked when harry made jokes. he was funny when he wanted to be. usually it would be you making the rude comment and harry being the one to laugh, but today, harry was different. he seemed easier to talk to today. harry was always naturally more kept to himself, and you the more outgoing type. you brought out the best in each other. he didn't feel as distant today. it was nice. you leaned back against the stone fountain and looked back towards the malfoy manor. it looked gorgeous in the scarlet light beaming from the sun, and you noticed the reflections of yellow and white off the windows.

harry noticed you distracted expression and "you know, i finally realized why you like coming outside as much as you do. it's peaceful here. something nice about a cloudless day." that caught your attention and your head whipped around to face him.

"what did you say?" you asked, trying to hold back your complete shock and partial excitement.

harry met your eyes and then looked back at the sky. "what, about the clouds? i don't know, i see so many clouds all the time, something about seeing a beautiful sky without any clouds kind of, i don't know, makes me feel...good. in a way. i guess. i don't know, you're the twin that got the better vocabulary." it meant the world to you that harry said that. you didn't know why, it just felt like you weren't alone, in some weird way. you smiled at your brother.

"how are you holding up, harry? must be hard, having to contain yourself the entire dinner without using your salad fork to commit first degree murder," you joked, standing upright, moving your body from off the stone fountain. you noticed the carefully carved floral patterns and depictions of all sorts of animals and plants.

he only chuckled at your question, shifting his body weight, his side now leaning against the fountain and facing you. "i'm not going to lie, it's been hard. he was right there, and after a while, i had to distract myself from throwing myself over the table and putting my fork in his eye." he said through a grin. i gave him a sarcastic look and lowered my head before asking a question.

"what do you think they're talking about? i mean, it's odd how mum and dad are willingly having dinner and being, well, friendly, with the malfoy's. i don't like it. peter looks horrified, i don't know how well he's doing, and remus and sirius look like they might hurt someone who looks at them wrong. i don't know, it's just... weird." you said, kicking a few rocks that were at your feet. harry didn't exactly know how to respond.

"i don't know," he said after a minute of thought, "but i bet they're being smart. i trust mum and dad, at least enough to be confident in their decisions." harry always knew what to say when he saw you anxious. it wasn't super obvious right now, but he'd spent almost fourteen years with you and could read you like an open book. he knew you would start getting lost in your own thoughts if he didn't say anything and he knew how bad it could get. he decided to stop it while he was ahead and try to do what he could in advance.

you liked when he tried to get your mind off of getting lost in your own thoughts. he was pretty good at it, and even when he didn't say exactly what you needed, you knew he only wanted to help. your brother was kind and thoughtful when he wanted to be.

"thanks harry." you nodded and harry walked off to rejoin his mother in the sitting room. you went back to weeding as it was nice for you to do something familiar. you felt a pretense behind you that you knew wasn't harry and your face became bright red.

"are you weeding my garden?" draco said confused from behind you. you sprung up, and turned around, trying your best to conceal the fact your dirt-ridden hands were slightly shaking and sweat dripped down the side of your face for the second time today. you and draco shared the same house and most of your classes, and for whatever strange, odd reason became good friends, bonding over the fact you felt like you disappointed your parents at times. he was, to your complete and utter surprise, a good person to talk to and joke about your problems when you felt your family wouldn't be able to understand. but you took the liberty of convincing draco to keep your friendship a secret, not wanting bad blood between your families because of draco's and harry's petty feud. you felt you two hid your friendship well, him tossing the occasional harmless insult your way in public and you always having a response at the ready. you two would laugh about it later in the common rooms when no one was there, or sometimes you would joke and write fake letters to each other, pretending you were relatives or friends from back home as to not look too sketchy in front of others.

it really started first year when draco found you in moaning myrtle's bathroom first year, the first week of school, when you had finally been able to get away from everyone while they were at dinner and be alone with your own thoughts.

your anxiety was through the roof. you hated being in slytherin, dirty looks from other house as you wore your green tie walking around with harry and his red one. everyone knew you two, your parents were quidditch legends and went on to work great positions in the ministry. everyone knew what house they were sorted in. you didn't care much until your second day when other students started asking you how it felt to disgrace your family name by being slytherin. it hurt you, the pressure of feeling like you would never be able to live up to your family's expectations of you. your brother was perfect, a golden boy as of the first day in your parents eyes. you felt like you had to work harder to even match harry and his effortless greatness.

you were in the courtyard, sitting with harry and ron, discussing potions class that had ended just fifteen minutes ago.

"i mean, seriously, what is up with that snape?! why would he become a teacher if he seemingly hates children so much?!" ron cried, the confusion most clearly showing in his voice. harry bellowed with laughter and you chuckled convincingly enough as to not draw attention to your shaking hands and racing heart. you let your hair fall in front of your face as you told the two boys you needed to go to the bathroom, neither of them noticing your flushed face as you sprinted across the halls and down to steps to the bathroom you knew you wouldn't be interrupted in.

you flung open the door, running across the dim lit and stone washroom with your heart leaping out of your chest, your air seemingly escaping your lungs with every breath you took. you couldn't stand being alone when you were forced to face your own anxiety, but you couldn't bring yourself to drag your brother into this one. your back against the cold wall, slowly sliding down until you were slumping on the floor, you let the tears stream down your face, allowing yourself to be feel the anxiety that had been in building up inside you for hours.

as the minutes passed by, your breathing got worse and your shaking intensified, causing you to fall onto your side, not enough strength in you to pick yourself up. you laid there for a moment, finding the floor comforting, but you heard footsteps just outside the bathroom and instantly attempted to hide the mess you had just become. you were unsuccessful.

"y/n? y/n potter?" draco malfoy said, shocked at the state you were in. he didn't have a clue what to do; should he try and help you?

"hi," you said weakly. "draco, right?" draco looked back at you, unfamiliar with the idea of being called by his first name rather than his last. he wasn't used to hearing his first name without his last name following it, let alone by itself and by someone in his own year. he quickly pushed the idea to the back of his brain.

"yeah," he replied, confusion visibly plastered on his face. he had no idea how to react to any part of this situation. after a short beat, he finally worked up the nerve to suggest the only idea that came to his head. "do you want me to get your brother?"

"no!" you exclaimed, draco slightly taken aback.

"okay, i won't, merlin." draco said, more sarcastically than promisingly. you wiped away the tears you could and did your best to hide the obvious shaking in your shoulders and legs.

you looked at the gel-haired blonde with puffy eyes and sighed. "i'm sorry if i said that more alarmingly than needed. i didn't meant to scare you or offend you. i just get anxious and had a bit of an episode, and sometimes i'm easy to anger during them, but i promise i'm nice otherwise." you took a deep breath. "it's just, everyone knows my parents and knows they were gryffindor's and i feel like such a failure when they have this amazing, perfect, gryffindor son and then a slytherin daughter. do you have any idea what that feels like?" you looked at him, and widened your eyes. "sorry. i know you don't care." you looked away, embarrassed. what you didn't know was that he knew exactly what it felt like to be a disappointment to people you looked up to. he sympathized with you.

draco stared at you and the only thing he could think of to do in the moment was something y/n wasn't prepared to hear.

"i can stay here. with you. if you'd like." he was even surprised at the sentence that formed in his mouth. you looked at him, not convinced he wasn't joking, but nodded anyway. he put his arm around you awkwardly, but instantly relaxed as he felt your shaking come to a slow stop. from that moment on, you knew you had someone who could understand what you felt when you thought no one else did. you came to each other about your parents and became each other's best friend in the next three years, cleverly hiding your friendship in any measure necessary. you thought it was fun, but always hated the fact you hid something so important to you from one of the people you were closest to: harry.

"y/n?" draco repeated, forcing you to snap back to reality. you hadn't realized you had been standing in front of draco lost in thought not saying a word.

"sorry," you replied, "zoned out." draco only laughed.

"okay, y/n." he turned to look down at the pile of weeds by your side. "having fun, at least? you know, with all your...weeding?"

you looked back at him with a half-hearted smile. "shut it." you only said, turning back to your weeding as not to arise any suspicions of your close bond.

"alright then," he continued anyway, his head now looking up towards the piercing scarlet sky, never really taking in the beautiful view until you had pointed it out to him while you two were in the common room one night at hogwarts. you told draco that the skies are always the most eye-catching at sunset and not to let anyone tell him different. he liked to argue it was at the sunrise, but he knew you were right. "do you think harry suspects anything?" he asked hushed, a sliver of worry in his voice.

you let go of trying to be subtle and stood up facing him. "let me tell you from the girl who has to share his dna, for a very bright guy, harry is stupid when it comes to noticing his own surroundings. he's clueless. not just to us, but to everything. he's always off in his own world, oblivious to everything around him, so we shouldn't worry about him finding out unless someone sees us together and finds a way to make it into every day conversation. are we good now?" you responded, trying your best to convince your dear friend your twin brother was as dull as you knew he was. draco's pouted lips curled into a smile as he still faced the setting sun in the distance. you rolled your eyes at your idiotic best friend and leaned against the stone fountain you were talking to harry at just moments prior.

"yeah. we're good. i'm glad i have an over thinker like you for a friend. if i didn't, i'm convinced our allyship would have been outed by now," draco laughed to himself. "but you're a cunning slytherin, y/n." you turned to look at him, eyes narrowing as he looked at you with a look you knew he meant.

your hair blew in the gentle breeze again, the july evening finally creeping up on you as you rinsed your hands yet again in the fountain. "are you done?" you said after a moment, looking back at draco with a sarcastic smirk. he tried his best not to look amused by your comment, but couldn't hide his emitting snicker.

"no, no, please continue with your sappy and cheesy and other food related adjectives to describe your gratefulness for our friendship, i want to hear it, draco. it really interests me, i find it fundamental for my survival." you joked. he elbowed you in the shoulder, you pushing him back, and after a moment, you heard angry footsteps behind you.

"don't touch my sister, malfoy." harry said, no desperate measures taken to hide his rage. you eyed him angrily, the obvious displeasure on your expression as you two had another one of you split second eye conversations.

did he hurt you?

i'm fine, harry. let it go.

no. he's not allowed to touch you. you're my sister.

harry, get off your high horse. i can take care of myself. he didn't do anything and i would have asked for you if i needed you. i can make my own decisions, and i trust you to be confident in mine the way i support yours. are we understood?

harry's eyes burned into yours, but you had played this game before. you glared at him, and he finally dropped his gaze from you and turned back to malfoy.

"you stay away from her, malfoy, you hear me?" harry bellowed, bitterness riddled within his words.

draco opened his mouth to say the million rude things that had popped into his head but you turned your head to him, your lips scowled and eyes pleading for him to just drop it. he read your face and sacrificed his moment to tell your brother off, leaving him with a glower and a slow walk in direction towards the house.

after draco was out of earshot, harry turned to you, concern building in his eyes.

"are you okay? did he hurt you?"

you pulled away from your overprotective brother. "i'm fine harry, no need for your distress. he wasn't doing anything, were just joking around. he's not that bad if you actually get to talk to him for once, harry."

harry only let out a contemptuous laugh as his head wrapped around the thought of draco malfoy being able to hold a conversation without smacking him atop the head. "y/n, you must be joking." you rethought what you had just said and dropped it.

"harry, can we just ask mum and dad to go back home now? i'm tired and i'm going to start saying things i don't mean if i stay at this house for a minute longer." you said, trying to reason with your more than aggravated brother. he nodded, putting a hand behind your back as you both made you way back to the manor. harry was officially done with his act of being polite for the night. he couldn't stand draco malfoy and hated him even more after he witnessed him talk to his sister.

you and the rest of your party bid your goodbyes to the rest of the malfoy family and were home sooner than you thought. you took off your uncomfortable dress and showered, changed into sweats, and flipped onto your bed all in what felt like one swift movement. it felt good, being in the comfort of your room, something familiar and constant in your life. this night turned into something you wouldn't want to relive again. you were tired and your last thought before you drifted off the sleep were of how good your soft pajamas felt on your skin, completely ignoring the pigment from hours ago that still stained your pillow cases.

you were awoken by a loud noise outside your window as you shot up to find an owl fluttering against the window pane. what in the world- you thought to yourself as you opened the window to let in the owl and let it rest. you untied the letter from the owls leg and check to see who the letter was from. from aunt pamela the cover of the letter read. you knew who it was from instantly: draco. he often used this ploy when he wrote letters to you and wanted to keep it disguised. you tore through the top of the letter and began to read what it had said-

"my dearest y/n,

i hope this letter finds you in good health as my owl is quite fearless and will not hesitate to fly through a storm or rough wind of some sort.

the last time i saw you, i believe we were interrupted during our last conversation. i was in the middle of telling you all the sappy and cheesy and other food related adjectives to describe my gratefulness for our friendship, more relationship as i am most definitely your aunt.

but returning to our conversation, i really do love having you as a friend niece. it's nice to have someone i can talk to that knows exactly how i feel.

i hope to see you again soon before your classes restart. i would like to discuss your upcoming year before you're off. in private, preferably, we don't want anyone like your brother listening in on our talk.

i'll see you soon.

aunt pamela"

you tried to keep in your laughter. so much for subtlety on draco's end. you found a quill and ink and some loose parchment and began to write him back, completely ignoring your insistence on hiding your friendship.

"draco,

your letter was stupid and you could have done better. i expect more from you, malfoy. so much for subtlety.

i'm joking. although i will admit you do need some work when it comes to being vague.

to answer your question, i would like to see you at least one more time before the school year begins, possibly to discuss upcoming events. i heard the ministry is conducting some sort of big event this year that involves the participation of other schools. i wonder what that's all about.

anyway, maybe we can go for tea one day. write back soon.

love,

your dearest y/n"

after you felt confident in the owl's ability to travel safely back to malfoy manor, you knotted the letter to its leg and quietly opened your window to let it out. the next day, you and your family were visiting hogsmeade and diagon alley with your uncles again. you looked forward to it, saving some money to visit some shops you missed. you turned your lamp back off and fell sound asleep as soon as your head hit the pillow. tomorrow would be a good day.

at least, you hoped.