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#its the little things in life that keeps me going
aemondloverr · 1 day
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𝐑𝐞𝐥𝐮𝐜𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐉𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐞𝐲
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𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: 𝐂𝐫𝐞𝐠𝐚𝐧 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐤 𝐱 𝐅𝐞𝐦!𝐕𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐫𝐲𝐨𝐧!𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 (𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝟐) 
𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝟐 • 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 • 𝐓𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭
𝐒𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: As the eldest daughter of Rhaenyra, you are sent to the North to negotiate terms with Lord Stark.
𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭: Disapproving Jace
𝐰𝐜: 𝟐.𝟒𝐤
𝐀/𝐍: Ngl school was kicking my ass but I still wanna deliver 😪 (btw, cregan appears in the next part, not the first. AND for some reason links are currently not working :( Sorry abt that!! Must be some kind of bug)
❆ • ❆ • ❆ • ❆
“Mother? You sent for me?”
Rhaenyra is sitting at a table in her chambers, sipping wine and surrounded by various papers and documents. She looks up as you enter and a soft smile tugs at her lips, her eyes seeming to light up for just a moment
“Yes, my daughter. Come, sit with me.”
She pats the seat beside her, clearing a space among the piles of documents. There's an expectant look in her eye, her gaze resting on you
“I have something to discuss with you.”
Oh no
You know whenever those words come from the mouth of a mother, it’s never good. You’re either in trouble, or it’s something serious.
You approach the chair nervously and sit.
She sighs and sets down her glass of wine, shifting her attention fully to you. Her eyes seem to search your face for a moment before she speaks again.
“You're growing up so fast, you know that? It feels like just yesterday you were a little girl running through the gardens, laughing and playing with your brothers.”
You smile at the mention of fond memories.
Oh Gods. A speech is always a bad indicator. Especially one of childhood.
A pang of bittersweet nostalgia seems to pass over Rhaenyra’s features as she continues, her voice taking on a hint of regret
“Sometimes, I wish I could freeze time and keep you just as you are right now, still young and innocent, before the world has a chance to harden your heart. But… that’s not the way things work, is it?”
“I know mother…” Your smile quickly fades and you worry for what she’ll say next.
Rhaenyra holds your gaze for a moment before she speaks again, her voice soft and earnest
“You're much more perceptive than your brothers, you know that? You always were, even as a child. You always seemed to know what I was thinking before I even said it-”
“Is there something you want me to do?” It would be nice if she stopped beating around the bush and just asked.
She takes a deep breath as if steeling herself for what comes next, her gaze unwavering and intent on you
“…As you know, my reign is not without its challenges. There are those who question my claim to the throne, who think that my rule is not rightful. I need you to understand, my love, that in the future you may be forced to make difficult decisions, decisions that will impact not just your own life, but the future of the entire realm.”
You stare, expectantly
“This is why I am asking you to go to Winterfell…”
What…??
“But mother…”
She knows that this is the part where you'll likely protest
“I know you don't want to go, my love. I know that leaving home, leaving me, is difficult for you. Believe me, I would not ask this of you if there was any other option.”
“But Cregan…you know what he did…”
You’d expected something important yes, but this?…This was simply too much to ask of you .
Her hand comes to rest on top of yours in a comforting gesture.
“I know, my love. I know it hurt you greatly, believe me, it pained me to see you so distraught.”
“So why can’t you send Jace. Why would you send me to see him??”
“Jace is a good, honourable boy. I know he would do his duty and serve me well as a diplomatic envoy to Winterfell. But he is not you. I'm sending you for a reason, my love.”
“And why’s that??” You begin to get frustrated
Rhaenyra looks straight into your eyes, her gaze unwavering as she speaks
“Because Cregan Stark is a proud and stubborn man, one who values strength and resilience. He is unlikely to listen to just anyone. But he knows you. He once cared for you, deeply. I'm sending you there as someone who has the potential to sway him to our cause.”
“This is not fair. How could you even consider asking me this when you know—“
She sees you tearing up and reaches out to brush a strand of hair out of your face, her touch, gentle and tender
“You know that duty must take precedence over desire…”
“For the realm...” You mutter, a tear falling
Rhaenyra's heart aches to see the tears in your eyes, but she doesn't falter in her resolve. She lifts her free hand to your face, gently wiping away a tear that threatens to spill down your cheek.
“Yes, my love. For the realm…”
She gently pulls you closer, letting you rest your head against her shoulder. She runs her fingers through your hair, her touch soft and soothing
“…For our family. For all the people we are sworn to protect.”
*****
Later that evening at supper
The entire family is gathered around the large table in the dining hall, eating their supper and engaging in light conversation. Rhaenyra is seated at the head of the table, daemon at the other with Jace seated to her left and Luke to her right.
Joffrey is seated across from Jace, chattering away happily about some toy he received. Rhaenyra glances up to where you are sitting, a small but weary smile on her face
Jace notices your quieter-than-usual demeanor and nudges you gently with his elbow
“Hey, are you alright? You're awfully quiet tonight.”
“Yea I’m alright, I’ll tell you later” you whisper.
Jace looks at you for a moment, his expression one of concern, but nods understandingly. He returns to his food, but you can feel his gaze occasionally flicking over to you throughout the meal.
*****
Rhaenyra stands and taps her glass.
At her signal, the conversation around the table dies down, and everyone turns to face her. Rhaenyra stands, her expression serious as she looks around at her family
She clears her throat and speaks, her voice steady and commanding
"Before everyone retires for the evening, I have an announcement to make."
Rhaenyra takes a deep breath, her gaze flickering briefly to you before continuing.
"As you all know, the stability of the realm depends on maintaining strong alliances and relationships with our noble houses. It is therefore necessary for me to send an envoy to Winterfell to reinforce our ties there."
A pause.
"I have decided to send your sister to Winterfell as our representative. She will leave in two days' time."
There is a moment of stunned silence as the rest of the family processes this information. Jace looks over at you, his forehead creasing with confusion. Luke's mouth has dropped open in surprise. Even Joffrey is silent, for once.
Jace protests. Daemon just sits back and watches the drama
He speaks up immediately, his voice filled with concern
"Mother, surely you can't be serious? You're sending our sister all the way to Winterfell? Alone? It's too dangerous!"
Rhaenyra looks at Jace with sympathy but irritation at his protest.
"I understand your concern, my son, but this decision is not up for debate. Your sister is perfectly capable of handling herself and representing our house honorably."
“At least let me go with her“
"No, Jace. I cannot spare you here, I need you by my side. One dragon in the open is enough and the greens could spot you” your mother says sternly.
“Mother you can’t just-”
Joffrey cries and Luke tries to comfort him. He doesn’t like the arguing and yelling
“It is done Jacaerys. You will argue no more about this!”
You quickly excuse yourself from the table, hurrying to your chambers.
Jace looks like he wants to say something, but Rhaenyra gives him a warning glance, and he reluctantly stays silent
As you head back to your chambers, you can hear the murmurs of the rest of the family resume, their low voices discussing the announcement Rhaenyra made. As you begin to pack your things, there's a soft knock on your door
“Enter”
Jace enters the room, closing the door behind him. He stands awkwardly for a moment, his hands fidgeting at his sides. Finally, he takes a deep breath and speaks, his voice filled with concern
"Are you really okay with this, going to Winterfell and seeing...him again?"
“I…have to” your back is turn from him as you put your clothing into leather bags
His expression softens and he moves closer to you, placing a reassuring hand on your shoulder* "I know, but that doesn't make it any easier. I don't want you to get hurt, especially not by him."
“You need not worry Jace, I will be fine.” You already know that’s a lie. And he does too. But saying it out loud makes it feel true.
"You can say that all you want, but that doesn't make it any less worrying. I know how much he meant to you before."
“I am not going there to pursue him, I am going there to gain the North as an ally for our house.”
Jace nods, his expression serious once more
"I know that's the purpose of the mission, but you can't deny that seeing him again will be hard for you. You have feelings for him."
“What are you saying Jace.”
Jace sighs and runs a hand through his hair, glancing at you with concern "I'm saying that you're fooling yourself if you think going to Winterfell and seeing Cregan Stark isn't going to stir up feelings you thought you had buried."
“So what if it does…It’s not like I’m going to act on them.” You’re just going to do what is asked of you and leave. Nothing more.
"You say that now, but what happens if he wants to revisit the past with you? What if he wants to rekindle what you had between you?"
You let out a huff of frustration. “Just stop Jace. You don’t know anything anyways…”
He takes a step back, his expression hurt, almost. "What do I know? I know that you've been in love with Cregan Stark since you were children, and I know how much it hurt you when he left and you still haven’t gotten over it!”
You turn and look at him in disbelief that he would mention the very thing you’ve been trying to avoid. “Just go…Leave!”
Jace's expression softens at your harsh tone, and he takes another step back, swallowing thickly. He opens his mouth as if to say something, but then closes it again, his eyes flicking to the ground before back up to you.
“Fine.”
He shuts the door with force.
You stand alone in your room, the silence heavy and oppressive without Jace's presence. You feel your emotions welling up inside of you, a mixture of anger and sadness and frustration at Jace's words. But deep down, you can't shake the feeling that you know he’s right.
*****
For the next two days you stay in your room, packing and pondering until the night it’s time to leave.
The atmosphere in the castle is tense, the realization of your imminent departure hanging heavy in the air. Rhaenyra and the rest of the family have gathered to see you off.
Rhaenyra stands next to Silverwing, watching you with a mixture of sadness and pride. The dragon emits a low, melancholic whine, as if sensing the gravity of the situation. The boys and daemon stand on either side of Rhaenyra, their faces stoic but anxious.
“I will see you in few weeks time.”
Rhaenyra nods, her expression solemn. She steps forward and hugs you tightly, pulling you to her chest. The hug is firm and possessive, conveying a mixture of love and protectiveness.
"Be safe, my love. I will count every day until your return."
You step aside to hug Jace. He returns your hug, his arms wrapping around you tightly. He holds you close for a moment, his chin resting on the top of your head. When he pulls back, his expression is still serious, and he mutters quietly.
"Be careful, alright? Don't do anything stupid."
“No promises…”
Jace gives your shoulder a reassuring squeeze before stepping back to allow Luke to say his goodbyes. Luke hugs you tightly, burying his face into your shoulder. When he pulls back, he's fighting back tears, his voice wavering when he speaks
"I don't want you to go."
Joffrey then hugs at your waist, teary eyed, his aebottom lip trembling.
"Please don't go, please...I want you to stay."
Joffrey buries his face into your stomach, his small hands tugging at your dress. Luke places a hand on Joffrey's shoulder, trying to soothe his younger brother's distress. He looks at you helplessly, his own eyes glassy with tears
“Hush sweetlings…I wont be gone forever” You kiss their cheeks and tops of their heads
"You'll come back, right? You promise?"
“I promise.”
Joffrey and Luke both look up at you, their eyes wide and pleading, searching your face for assurance. Rhaenyra steps forward, her hand resting on each of their shoulders.
"Your sister will be back before you know it, and she'll come back with a great success for our house."
Even Jace tears up a bit but rolls his eyes, trying to play it off.
"I'm not tearing up. I just got something in my eye, that's all." He rubs at his eye, trying to cover up the fact that he is, in fact, on the verge of crying.
Then comes Daemond with a large, tight hug, practically suffocating you.
“Alright alright I love you too” you struggle with a strained voice and he finally lets go
“Just come back in one piece.”
“You know I will” you playfully push his shoulder.
You tie your bags to Silverwing and mount her saddle, blowing air kisses as you lead silver wing out of the den and out into the dark of the night.
The entire family watches as you and Silverwing take flight, the dragon's wings beating strongly as you soar into the black sky.
A sense of melancholy hangs in the air, the weight of your absence already palpable among those left behind. Rhaenyra's expression is solemn as she watches you disappear into the distance, a silent prayer on her lips for your safe return.
❆ • ❆ • ❆ • ❆
𝐀/𝐍: I hope you enjoyed and forgive me for the delay. AP clases are NOT for the weak 😭 part 2 will definitely be out winning the next few weeks tho. Let me cook.
PS. The plot is a bit different from the teaser. Please don’t be mad at me🙏🏾
@beebeechaos @iv-vee @aemondwhoresworld @obscure-beauty @6ternalsun @msmarvelknight @melsunshine @cregansfourthwife
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lumosinlove · 3 days
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Write Me In
Part Five
~
His office felt weird. New York felt weird. Even being with Cassie felt weird. Leo was so groggy in his real life that sometimes, when he was washing his face or sitting in a meeting or grabbing a bagel for lunch, he wondered if he had just been sleeping that whole time with Finn and Logan. He wouldn’t put it past himself to dream up something like that. Leave it to him to think making dinner for two of the biggest names in the music industry was a daydream. And the kissing, of course, but he spent far more time thinking about salt water in Finn’s hair and the way Logan looked walking around the markets. It was all smeared gold in his mind. And then there were the dirty dreams which he kept accidentally thinking about in meetings.
The article was going to lead this month’s issue, which meant it would come out right as Finn and Logan started up their tour again. A crew was being sent out to Nice for the cover shoot and Leo had been so jealous when he found out that he’d had to excuse himself from the meeting for a moment. He missed them. He probably scrolled through their messages too much.
The thread started when Leo had settled into a cab and opened the app to text them that he’d landed, only to find an incoming FaceTime call interrupting him. Leo had saved their numbers under their initials—as if that would really fool anyone. So, when Finn’s first FaceTime had popped up, he’d been more than surprised to find difficult little rock star calling him instead, complete with a photo that Finn seemed to have taken himself—him and Logan basking in the sun, hair wet from the ocean and cheeks smushed together.
Leo had answered with, “and what’s Logan saved under then?”
Finn had just grinned and ran off screen—presumably to grab Logan’s phone because a second later, Leo got a text of !! from grumpy<3
Leo figured that was subtle enough to keep. He’d pushed his headphones into his ears and let Finn’s voice fill his head as the city rose up and greeted him in its sunset.
Somehow, without so much as a ripple, talking to them had started feeling like talking to old friends. Once a day. Twice a day. Photographs of their lunches and messy work spaces in between. When Leo received his fist voice memo, he’d had to lock himself in the bathroom at work and breathe a few times before hitting play.
“Hi, Le,” Finn’s voice said. “Okay—we’re writing today. Lo, hello, say hi.”
“Hi, hey,” Logan said, then let out a wicked cough. “Sorry, Finn made me do one of those ginger shots and I’m in hell.”
Leo covered his laugh with his hand.
“Shut up, it’s good for you,” Finn replied. “Okay, anyway. So, this is called—oh, I’m gonna be on the piano. But this is—and I’m gonna try to play it straight through.”
“Stop interrupting yourself,” Logan said, then it sounded like he got closer to Finn’s phone. “It’s called Neon Signs and it’s off of the new album, and we know your editor wanted you to hear one more song for the piece so—ouais. Go, Finn.”
“I was going to say I’m on the piano and on the album it’s also piano. So. There.” He laughed and played a few chords. “Okay. It’s about one of the times when we almost got together, but we didn’t. We were at a bar that we weren’t old enough for.”
“And Finn got us stuck outside because they wouldn’t let us back in,” Logan said.
“Fool them once, and all that,” Finn cut in.
“It was freezing.” Logan’s voice, then a pause. “And I kissed him.”
“Again,” Finn said, laughing. “Anyway, spoilers. Here we go.”
There were a few seconds of dead air. Just Finn breathing. Leo pressed his headphones against his ears and kicked up his volume in time to hear Logan whisper something in French and Finn hush him.
I wanted you to meet me outside.
We’re not old enough to drink, no, not quite.
And leaving this bar means risking getting stuck out in the cold.
But I said ‘follow me’ you said ‘all right.’
Pulling up your hood against the frost bite.
And now that we’re here, there are too many things I want you to know.
But somehow I can tell tonight is not when you’ll be told
That just the look of you beneath that neon sign
Sure is something to behold…
It’s soft and blue…
Like me and you…
Maybe I’ll do this forever,
Only kiss me when it’s snowing.
Cause at least it isn’t never,
Though I can’t see where we’re going.
If only that light from that neon sign
Made you see me
Just as brightly
Oh God
Where’s my,
Neon,
Bar sign?
One that you can read.
Put it over me.
Bathe me in signals and the arrows pointing where I want to lead.
“Oh,” Leo said softly to himself—reacting to the lyrics, but also to Finn’s piano. It was a meandering, sad tune. As if even the music wasn’t sure what its next note would be. The song took them out of winter next and through to summer. Into humidity, and strings lights and patios and dorm rooms, sweltering with the door closed and no AC. A goodbye—was this them going to college? And it was Logan singing. Fall and desperate for something to last. Finn fumbled a little on the piano, cursed softly, and despite the next sad lyric, Leo could hear Logan smiling. Instead walked into my own past. You’re sitting on the bed and I’ve never felt less or more alone.
Leo listened to it four times. It was hypnotizing. Yes, he knew the story. He’d been given the precious task of telling the story—but they were telling it, too.
Meanwhile, the article was going through drafts and drafts. He’d fought hard to keep the section about Logan’s market in. His editor hadn’t seen the relevance, and maybe Leo’s relevance wasn’t entirely music-based, but those markets were in the songs. Maybe not in so many words, but Logan was as gentle as his voice could be when he was there. He stood still in that space, listening to the rhythm and thrum of the people around him.
Sending cover shoot to you without me :/ Leo typed out.
Finn replied almost instantly: I’ll refuse to pose until you arrive.
Then Logan: I will lock them out.
Ha, Leo wrote.
No Ha. It’s my house.
I’m at the office—in the final meeting for the article. He thought for a second, then smiled as he typed out. Everyone’s so happy for you.
You are coming to our first show, Logan typed out, and then a few seconds later, ? accompanied it, as if Finn had forced it out of him.
I’m coming to a show. Not sure when yet, Leo said. I’m on another project and have to finish it up before—
His eye caught on his phone’s clock. Jesus. He’d been in here for ten minutes texting like a teenager between classes. Before what? Before I can come back to you. Before I can come home, before I can come back because I miss you.
The thrill that came from being able to know he missed them because he knew them was strong.
—before I can make it, he finished. Have to go back to meeting now
Finn sent him five rows or pink hearts, Logan said, we miss you, and Leo sat back down in his meeting with a smile on his face that earned him weird looks. Cassie stared at him until someone asked her a question.
~
“Okay, so you’re gonna spill all your beans now.” Cassie jabbed him gently with her fork at lunch. “Like. Right now.”
“I don’t have beans.” Leo tilted his bowl to her. “This is my mama’s chicken salad recipe. Want some?”
Cassie groaned. “Just tell me why you’re grinning at your phone like an idiot every chance you get!”
“I’m not.”
“You are, you are.”
“I’m not, I’m not.”
“Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah.” Cassie grabbed onto his arm. “Tell me.”
“I’m excited for them,” Leo said. “That’s all. I’ve always looked up to them, and this is a big deal.
“So we are talking about Finn and Logan?”
Leo froze, caught. “Oh.”
It wasn’t his fault. They filled every little space of his mind. And if there was somewhere they couldn’t reach, they pressed up against that part, all warm and insistent.
Cassie threw her head back and squealed. “Leo. Tell me, tell me—”
“Oh-ho my God, they kissed me.”
Cassie stared at him, voice cutting off. Leo slapped his hands over his own mouth.
“You don’t know that,” Leo said quickly, just as Cassie made a soft, breathy sort of screeching sound.
“Wh-at?” she set her fork down with exaggerated precision. “What did you just say?”
Leo glanced around the courtyard they were in, but they were alone. In the shade, sun dappling down on them, and alone.
“They?” Cassie’s hand on his sleeve twisted the fabric. “They kissed you?”
He hadn’t meant to say a word, but the knowledge was like a fire inside of him. Being wanted like this. Being wanted by them.
Cassie started laughing, surprised and delighted. “Leo.”
“Yeah, they—apparently, um.” Leo shook his head. He didn’t even know how to say this. “They’ve been tracking my career since I just had the blog, and we were out by the fire pit and we almost—but we didn’t. And then we talked and I told them about Jack—sort of.”
Cassie’s blue eyes went wide at that, but she stayed quiet.
“And they sort of got why I was saying no.”
“You said no?”
“At first, at first.” Leo pushed his lunch away and dropped his voice. “Okay, okay, okay, sworn to secrecy.”
She squealed again through a shut mouth and hit him repeatedly in the arm.
“So, Nice,” Leo said. “Logan’s house.”
“Yeah, fuck you, by the way, meant nicely but with jealousy.”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know. But, so that night happened where they made the move a bit—”
“What does that even mean?”
“Mm, hard to explain. They were actually—” Leo’s laugh interrupted his words. “They were so bad at it.”
“Finn O’Hara is bad at making the moves?”
“Only when he means it, apparently.”
Cassie’s waved him on. “Okay, more, I need more.”
“So, we talked it out at the markets.”
“Ah. That’s why you like those sections so much. It’s all coming together.”
“Shut up.”
“And they kissed you there?”
“No,” Leo said. “Logan kissed me, just once, and um…” Leo bit back a grin. “And then later, Finn. Mostly because—I mean we said we’d take it slow and Logan was just keeping that promise, but I may have lost some resolve with Finn because—fuck, because.”
“He’s Finn O’Hara,” Cassie said. “I think ‘fuck, because’ is a fine reason.”
“And that’s when he said they want me to come back once I’m off their project. I mean, I know I have the follow up piece but…then I’ll be done.”
Cassie had her chin in her palm, the way she sometimes did when she was thinking. “Holy shit.”
“Yeah.”
“Wow.”
“Yeah.”
She sat up straight. “Both…of them?”
Leo opened his mouth, closed it, opened it again. “Honestly, I haven’t been even…feeling strange about that. Is that weird?”
“No,” Cassie said, shaking her head. “I mean, not if it’s working. You’re not, like…jealous?”
“No,” Leo answered. It was the truth. “I know I probably should be.”
“They are basically high school sweethearts,” Cassie said. “Like, this article, the way you describe them…That’s soulmate shit right there. I don’t mean you don’t fit with them, I’m just…”
“I know where you’re coming from, but…” Leo sighed, smiling. “And I went there, too, but it’s just not like that. I like the way they are together. The way they treat each other. I like it as much as I like the way the are with me.”
“Holy shit,” Cassie said, then laughed. “Oh man.” She pushed her lunch aside in favor of pulling her laptop out of her bag. “Holy shit, holy shit, which show do you want? Which show, Le, I want to book that all out right fucking now.”
“It’s one night.”
“Yeah, well, it’s gonna be a hell of a night.”
Leo reached forward and grasped her hand. “Don’t even joke about that with me, I’m a wreck.”
“Yeah, well, you need all the help you can get. You were there for, what, three weeks, and you just kissed?”
“I am—”
“No, I commend you, cowboy, you just have eons more willpower than I do.” She raised her eyebrows at him. “Now, which show?”
Leo had been thinking about it. Of course he’d been thinking about it. He pictured them in different cities. Walking different streets. But, in the end, there was no question. Leo wanted to be where they had figured everything out. Maybe they’d figure out each other, too.
“Italy,” Leo said. “I want Italy.”
~
He was nervous to see them, that was for sure. Cassie always followed through on her work quickly, but Leo felt like he had blinked through being home before he was staring down at an empty suitcase again. Italy. Milan. It would be warm. He’d be there for a week. Something casual for the shows. Something nice for press events. Something comfortable for…mornings? He stared in his underwear drawer for too long. When was the last time he’d had to care what he looked like in his underwear, much less what his underwear looked like. That turned into staring at his t-shirts for too long, only to pick up his Heartthrob O’Hara t-shirtand fold it into his suitcase. Then he sat on the edge of his bed and googled Logan Tremblay t-shirt. They weren’t that good. Grainy photos just plastered on fabric. He typed in Night Swimming lyric t-shirt. There were hundreds, but Leo had fun scrolling. He’d probably added too many things to his cart when he finally found what he was looking for. The shirt was white with four words in forest green on it.
OH MY
GREEN EYES
Leo bit back a smile and ordered it to be delivered tomorrow.
The next night, he was cooking dinner and squinting at his iPad, when the recipe webpage disappeared in favor of an incoming call.
“Milan?” Logan asked when Leo answered.
“Yep,” Leo said. He leaned his elbows on the counter. “Is that okay?”
“That’s longer,” Logan said.
“I know,” Leo sighed. “But it’s when I’m in between projects and can write your follow up.”
Finn mirrored his position, squeezing into the frame beside Logan. “Why don’t you come here right now? I’ll write you a note, get you out of school. Photoshoot tomorrow, you can watch us kiss on camera.” Finn snuck a hand out to grab Logan’s chin when he wasn’t looking and turned his face to kiss him, even if Logan was smiling too much to make it last.
Leo leaned forward. “I…As tempting as that is...”
“I liked it when we were your job,” Finn shot back. “You were around all the time.”
“Oh yeah? Not me,” Leo said. Finn blinked, and Leo fought a smile because he’d got him. “Kissing subjects is…”
“Fun?” Finn said. “A right we may exclusively reserve?”
Logan looked over at him with a smile and Leo was tempted to take a screenshot. He didn’t know how that would go over. He’d never taken a photograph of them himself. He knew that spooked some celebrities. In the beginning, he’d thought he’d die if he offended them. He still felt like that a bit.
“Shut up,” Logan said to Finn. “We don’t want to be Leo’s subjects.”
“I was kidding.”
“Listen,” Leo said. “It’s a right you can reserve, I’d just prefer you do it as you and not as Night Swimming.”
“Deal,” Finn said. He put his palm over the camera briefly, as if they had shaken on it. “What are you doing?”
“I’m cooking dinner.” Leo said, mimicking Finn’s sing-song—and then realized he’d basically just sung in front of Finn and tried to forget about it. “What are you doing?”
“Waiting for you to come back,” Logan said.
Leo arched a brow. “To cook you dinner?”
“Non,” Logan laughed. He rested his chin on a palm, and Leo got basically an entire screen full of those green eyes looking over—him, he realized. Logan’s gaze darted over his face like he could do it for hours. “Other things.”
Heat washed over him, and Leo bit his lip. “Hmm…Play me more songs?”
“Can do, Sunshine,” Finn said.
They kept him company while he finished cleaning up, taking him through the packet they’d been sent concerning their photoshoot tomorrow.
“We’re doing it down by the sea,” Finn said. He was lounging on the couch, Logan at his feet holding a cup of tea. “And some house shots.” He tapped the leather couch. “Probably right here. Or the kitchen…Well, if it’s the kitchen, I know what I’ll be thinking about.”
Leo laughed as he shut his dishwasher. “Yeah, that kitchen gets a lot of action when I’m there.”
“Not when I’m there,” Logan said.
“Don’t worry, baby,” Finn said, running his fingers through Logan’s hair. “We’ve got a pretty good track record in Italy, don’t we?”
~
Leo didn’t sleep much that night. He usually didn’t before a flight. Something about the anticipation. Not that this was bad anticipation. He let himself drift and think, rather than fall and worry. Still awake, but lighter. The story was out of his hands now, gone to turn into paper and ink. He would write his follow up, but then…
Just three people, Finn had said. Just three people.
On his nightstand, his phone lit up his dark ceiling. Leo turned his head. There weren’t many people who could get through his Do Not Disturb. Part of him got nervous, wondering if something was wrong, and he propped himself up on an elbow quickly, pulling the phone off its charger.
you’re awake
Three words, soft as a whisper. From Logan. Just Logan.
A moment later came the ?
Leo rolled onto his back, grinning.
are you spying on me somehow?
Finn said you have trouble sleeping, came the reply.
I do sometimes, Leo sent. And then, do you not like question marks or something?
I just thought I was right
Leo laughed out loud, all to himself.
well, I am awake.
are you okay? Logan asked.
Yeah. Just thinking.
A bit of a pause, just long enough to make Leo bite his lip.
about what?
Leo typed his reply out slowly, carefully. Savoring getting to say these words. Getting more than one kiss from you.
An immediate reply. maybe I won’t ruin it this time
Leo smiled. I think the last thing you did was ruin it.
:)
God. Smiley faces from Logan Tremblay.
go to sleep so you get here faster, Logan wrote. or just get here now.
Job—remember?
:(
Leo laughed again. I do have a surprise for you when I get there.
what is it? Logan asked immediately.
“Classic,” Leo whispered to himself, but just sent a smiley in return. Then, after a moment’s thought—
goodnight, green eyes
~
The article, when it came out, was hot as lightning. The photographs were gorgeous. Natural. They turned into each other like puzzle pieces, dressed in the muted, gentle browns of the house, and then the bright jewels of green and blue. But it was the opening show that came after it that caused the storm.
Leo didn’t get a single bit of work done—but neither did Cassie, so it was fine. He had never watched a grainy live stream closer and made Cassie go out and get him lunch so he didn’t have to get up. He brought his phone to the bathroom with him. He’d never refreshed Twitter so many times to find new photographs and videos. Finn, getting a pride flag thrown up to him at one point. The moments when they shared the microphone now sometimes ended in a kiss. A kiss. Leo was laughing and choked up all at once. Logan’s hat said rouge.
“Is there a reason you didn’t choose that show?” Cassie asked.
He’d thought about it. Being there. He could have gotten out of work—not in a I’m sort of kind of dating them and suddenly I miss them every second please let me go way but in a…this is important for the follow up way. But. He hadn’t. Somehow, he couldn’t bring himself to.
“This is a long time coming for them,” Leo said carefully, and found it true. “This is something they thought they’d never have. It’s theirs. And I wanted them to have it more than anything.”
Cassie’s eyes softened. She’d wrapped her arms around him and squeezed. “They better know how lucky they are if they’re getting you.”
Leo smiled and tilted their heads together, turning back to the show.
“Well, fuck,” Finn’s voice echoed through the stadium as he sat down at the piano. “You guys know what song’s coming by now, I guess.”
Rooftop, Leo thought, and shushed Cassie so harshly that she rolled her eyes and knocked him lightly on the shoulder.
Logan was still on stage, though, and getting up from behind his set. Leo’s heart leapt right into his throat.
“Something’s happening,” Leo said. “Something’s happening.”
“You shush,” Cassie said.
“Or at least you thought you did,” Finn said, then leaned back and laughed, the microphone barely catching it over the answering cheers. Logan crossed the stage, taking his time. Finn made room for him on the piano bench seat and Logan slotted perfectly against his side.
“No, look,” Finn played a few chords. “Rooftop has a special place in my heart, but it’s no part of tonight. Tonight…” He looked at Logan. “Tonight how about a little duet, Tremblay?”
Leo knew these chords. He loved these chords. And now, he could think of the lyrics that were about to come. They were probably some of the first words written about both of them letting themselves have each other…It was perfect. The crowd knew the song, too, and they were manic when Logan started playing the piano’s lower register, almost like a bass to Finn’s higher, softer melody.
A crew member brought out a second microphone and fixed it over the piano. Logan thanked him with a nod, and leaned in.
“You should have seen Finn trying to teach me piano,” his voice echoed.
Leo leaned closer to the screen. “Oh my God.”
Cassie sorted. “You’re so smitten.”
“They’re playing Keep.” 
“Yes, I know, I am a fan, too!”
I see you in the morning staring out over the waves.
I find I don’t need my instincts, never thought I’d see the day.
I could just roll over, yeah, I could close my eyes,
Cause I don’t have to grasp at glimpses, no, I’ve got my whole life.
I’ll tell anyone who asks, 
“Harmony, harmony,” Cassie said, imitating Leo’s accent.
Leo wrapped an arm around her shoulders and put his palm over her mouth. But she was right. The harmony, Logan joining in on the chorus, was exquisite.
I’ll show anyone who wants to see.
Like sea glass, or pebbles found on the beach.
Oh God, look at what I get to keep.
I’ll hold it as long as my breath lasts.
I’ll say it in all the languages they speak.
Like histories or songs sung while out at sea,
Hey Sunshine, what do you say you keep me?
Cassie made a strangled noise before Leo could. She pulled Leo’s hand away from her mouth.
“Sunshine? He just—They just changed the lyrics,” Cassie said. She got her arms around Leo’s waist and shrieked, making everyone in the office look at them. “He changed the lyrics.”
Leo was going to melt into his keyboard. Or cry? No. He was going to love them.
“I see you in the kitchen just before we go to sleep—” Finn gave his head a little, sharp shake, smiling, and when he looked up, Leo saw that he was crying, unable to sing through it. The crowd filled in. I find I don’t need my instincts, you are mine to keep.
Leo touched his lips lightly. Leo wouldn’t forget that sound, the stadium singing for them like that, even through a video. Not ever. He wouldn’t forget the feeling of knowing how much Finn and Logan deserved it. And how much he wanted them to have this. And how sweet is was when Logan played the last note, Finn wrapping an arm around him and pressing a lingering kiss to his temple, and Logan catching Finn’s tears with a gentle hand.
Finn found one of the stadium cameras, touched a hand to his mouth, and held it out.
Oh God, Leo was going to really love them.
~
Leo could feel the change in the air the moment he stepped of his airplane. Humid, but light. He rolled up the sleeves of his button-down and put his sunglasses on as he stepped into the warm afternoon. He was a little groggy from his flight, but not too bad. He was hungry, though, and in desperate need of a coffee—which he was most certainly in the right place for.
“Mr. Knut?”
Leo turned, pulling his suitcase up to his side. A man was standing there, sleek in a light gray suit and a driver’s cap. He had a neatly tripped gray beard, kind eyes, and a light British accent.
“Yes?” Leo said. “Oh, are you—”
“Mr. Tremblay’s driver, yes. Ralph, it’s a pleasure.” Ralph motioned towards his suitcase. “Might I take care of that for you, sir, on the way to the car?”
“Oh, no, that’s all right,” Leo said. “But thank you. It’s nice enough of him to send you to get me. Very kind.”
“Yes, he was very keen. This way, sir.”
Leo followed him the short distance to the car park, remarking on the weather just because he wasn’t used to being called sir. Ralph was kind about it, offering small talk right back. The car was shiny and black, the windows so dark and opaque that Leo guessed that was why Logan used it. He stored his suitcase and laptop bag and stuttered around Ralph opening his door for him.
“Oh, wow—thanks so much.”
“Of course, sir.”
Leo slid into the smooth, leather seat. The whole car smelled new. There was a water bottle waiting for him in the door side pocket, nestled into a tortoise shell cup holder. Leo took his sunglasses off just as the door shut—
And then someone was grabbing onto his shirt and tugging. An insistent, warm mouth covered his, swallowing Leo’s sound of surprise.
Logan. The warm, pine scent of him. The feeling of canvas when Leo made to touch his hair. The weight of him swinging a leg over Leo’s lap. Callouses on his hands where they smoothed up Leo’s neck.
“Hello,” Leo gasped. “Fuck.”
“Hi.” Logan barely said the word before he was kissing him again. Leo had to let his head rest back against the seat he was so dizzy with it. His mouth probably tasted sour, he was probably sweaty, maybe he even smelled from the plane, but Logan didn’t seem to care.
“Where’s—”
“Sound check,” Logan gasped, and then he had Leo’s bottom lip gently between his teeth, pulling and letting go. “He’ll be at the hotel by the time we get there.”
“You don’t need—your sound checked?”
“I need this.”
From his place on Leo’s lap, Logan put a hand on the ceiling. For a moment, Leo wondered what the hell he was in for in the back of this car, but Logan’s fingers found a button that he pushed and up a partition between them and Ralph began to rise.
“Hotel, sir?” Ralph asked as the sheet rose.
“Merci,” Logan confirmed, and then the partition cut them off in a muffled, tinted-window bubble of their own making and Logan’s hungry green eyes were all Leo was left with.
Their breathing sounded loud to Leo’s ears. He got his first good look at Logan. White t-shirt, black cotton shorts. Green hat, backwards. Tan, gorgeous, just like Leo remembered him, but even more real. A small scratch on his cheek from somewhere. He’d cut himself shaving on his chin, a little red dot. Leo reached up and took off his hat, letting his bangs fall forward in their gentle waves. They were pretty light from all the sunshine.
“Can he…” Leo whispered. “Can Ralph hear us?”
Slowly, Logan shook his head.
Leo reached up and tucked his fingers through Logan’s hair. He could have lived off of the way Logan’s eyes slipped closed. “How long is the drive?”
“Thirty minutes.”
“Hm.”
Logan’s smile looked like one of his soft, lulling songs. “What does that mean?”
Leo didn’t answer. He’d been taken by surprise, but that was fading now. All it left behind was want and relief. For now, he was done with the distance and the florescent lights of his office. He was back in Logan’s arms.
Thirty minutes felt like five. Logan’s soft sounds filled him right up as Leo kissed his neck—that was when Ralph’s gentle knock from the driver’s seat came. Leo broke off, startled. His mouth felt puffy—and good. Logan’s warm weight felt like the only thing holding him together.
“Ouais,” Logan called. “One moment.”
As Logan leaned their foreheads together, the world filtered back in. Leo became aware of the sound of a crowd outside, and had to laugh.
“Are we about to be photographed?”
“Probably a little,” Logan said. “It’s okay. You wouldn’t believe how many times Finn and I have had this happen.”
“What, got a little heavy in the car?”
Logan grinned, ducking to kiss Leo again. “Mhm.”
“That’s…” Really hot.
Logan slid off his lap, back to his side. They both spent a moment trying to pull themselves together. Logan would have to get out first, which made Leo feel a little better.
“They’ll bring your bags to the room,” Logan said. He slipped on a pair of sunglasses. “Ready?”
Hands banged against the windows, making Leo jump. There were some chants of Finn’s name, along with Logan’s, and Leo realized they didn’t know who was in the car. “I—yeah.” The room. “I think so.”
Logan considered him for a moment, then took off his own hat and placed it, bill forward, on Leo’s head.
“Oh,” Leo said. “Do I look—”
“You look how I want you to look. Merde, I want Finn to see you.” Logan grinned. “But it may be a bit much for a photo.”
Leo reached up and touched the hat. It was green and had said the word LOVE on it. That was a story Leo wanted to write. Logan could say a lot with his hats. There were whole twitter accounts dedicated to the way he hinted at future songs or albums with what was on his hat.
LOVE. Leo was wearing the word love.
“I know I shouldn’t hold your hand quite yet,” Logan began, trailing off.
Leo laughed. “That would spark some wild rumors.”
Logan looked at him over the rim of his glasses, the shadow making his green eyes bright. “Stay close to me, okay?” He popped the car door and the sound of the crowd doubled, frenzied, screaming, yearning. “Stay close.”
Leo could hear his own heartbeat. He could feel it in his throat. He did want to hold Logan’s hand. “I will.”
And Leo experienced the cameras and fans from an entirely different view. He’d followed Finn and Logan around. He’d never walked with them, not like this. Not side by side in a way that signaled to everyone he was with them.
He stuck close to Logan’s back, as promised. He caught some curious looks, felt phone cameras trained on him. The sun was bright and he was very glad for Logan’s hat. He tried to take it in, if for nothing further than that this was the biggest crowd he’d ever followed a star through from this close, but it was over in a flash. They were in a cool hotel lobby, marble and stone, and a smiling woman, motioning them to the elevator. Logan’s two security guards got in with them.
The sudden silence was loud. Logan took his sunglasses off, casually folding them into his shirt and leaning back against the wall as they rose.
“Here we go, Tremz,” one of the guards said, fist bumping Logan as he passed him through the open doors. “See you tonight. Remind Finn the dinner res he asked for is at eight-thirty.”
“Thanks, Paul.” Logan looked back from the hallway. “Leo?”
“Sorry,” Leo said and strode forward. “Thanks—Thanks, Paul.”
Paul was a massive guy, but when he smiled he looked like a teddy bear. “You got it, man.”
There was only one door on this hallway, right in front of them with a large brass knocker, and no sooner had the elevator shut than did it swing open to reveal Finn—sweaty, in a soft looking gray t-shirt and running shorts, and grinning.
“Jesus,” Logan said. “You scared me.”
“I heard the ding,” Finn said cheerfully.
He was looking right at Leo. Leo drew Logan’s hat off, trying to catch his breath.
“There were crowds,” Logan said, as if explaining.
“Yeah,” Leo said. “Are you guys famous or something?”
Finn ignored the joke. He walked right up to Leo, wrapped him up in his arms, and held on tight. Leo had maybe been expecting a kiss—probably something a tad more obvious than Logan’s sneak-attack. But the hug was better. Finn was warm. He smelled like sweat and sunscreen from being on stage.
“Hi,” Finn whispered in his ear. He pulled back, holding Leo’s cheek briefly, then gently tweaked a curl of Leo’s blond hair. “Hi, Sunshine.”
Leo covered Finn’s hand, turning his mouth against it. “Hi.”
“Come here,” Finn said, laughing. “Come in.”
“Ouais.” Logan put a hand low on Leo’s back, guiding him through the suite door. “Where’s my surprise?”
“What surprise?” Finn asked as the door shut behind them. Sure enough, Leo’s bags were waiting there, neatly side-by-side near the small kitchen.
“Not till later,” Leo said.
Logan narrowed his eyes. “How later?”
“Tomorrow later.”
Logan huffed.
Finn came up behind him, pressing a small cup into his hand. Espresso.
“Oh, how did you know?” Leo sipped it down easily. Hot and slightly sweet with sugar.
“You’re in Italy,” Finn said. Next he was wrapping an arm around Leo’s waist. “You understand that if it’s a physical surprise, he’s going to dig through your luggage?”
Leo toyed with his delicate espresso cup.“Not if I say not to.”
Finn’s chin hooked over his shoulder. Leo could feel his laugh against his skin. His strong chest against his back. His hips— “You think he’ll listen to you?”
They both regarded Logan, who was still glaring at them—and glancing at Leo’s suitcase.
“I think he will.”
“Hm,” Finn said, and Leo felt a kiss land on his neck. “I think you’re right.” Another kiss to the exact same spot. Over a mark Logan had made? “I see someone has already gotten to you.”
“I was accosted in the car,” Leo said.
“Classic.”
Logan just rolled his eyes and began dragging Leo’s suitcase into another room.
By that night, the fans who didn’t read up on their music stories had already figured out who he was. Leo Knut—last seen on the road writing the coming out piece on Night Swimming. Sure enough, Twitter was full of wearing Lo’s hat wearing Lo’s hat???
“Ooh, you’re so undercover,” Finn commented when he glimpsed Leo’s phone once they were back in the car, speeding through the night on the way to dinner. “They don’t know what’s coming for them.”
Leo clicked his phone off even as Cassie texted nice hat. He looked at Logan, at a purplish bruise Leo had left on his neck. “No, they really don’t.”
Logan covered the mark with his palm and grinned out the window. Leo laughed, looking, too, then paused.
“Hey, are we leaving the city?”
“Yep,” Finn said.
“Where?” Logan asked.
Finn shrugged exaggeratedly. He’d changed into a dark blue button down, light slacks, and pretty brown leather shoes that Leo badly wanted a pair of. He’d pushed a dark green button down towards Logan, dark trousers, and white, pristine sneakers. He’d taken one look at Leo and told him he was perfect, but Leo had showered and changed anyway. Dusty red shirt. He’d followed Finn’s lead and left the collar loose.
Logan kicked at Finn from his seat across from the both of them. Finn just stuck his tongue out and took Leo’s hand across the console between them. Leo stared at it for a moment. Finn’s pale fingers that would be playing a guitar to thousands of people tomorrow were right there wrapped up in his own.
“Where?” Logan insisted.
“Jesus, Lo, can neither of us try and surprise you? I know you found all your presents as a kid, but you’re not finding the ones I give you.” Finn dropped a wink. “I’ll give it to you when I decide.”
Apparently where was a castle. Literally a castle. Soft lights flooded up the old stones to reveal turrets and archways. A man in a tuxedo was waiting for them at the entrance. They were given champagne in thin, airy glasses and leave to roam the lit gardens before their dinner was served. The air was mild, but the feeling of Finn and Logan at his shoulders was better. Finn had something to say about every flower, every piece of architecture, as if he had studied up for this night. They ate dinner under the stars, watching fireflies dart through the greenery.
It wasn’t until they had been served an array of desserts and left truly alone that Leo thought to bring up the article and how they were doing—it was different to ask without a screen between them.
“We’re so good,” Finn said. He looked at Logan, who nodded. Finn wrapped an arm around Logan’s chair, scooting it closer to his. Leo watched him lean into him. His brown eyes flickered to Leo even as his lips brushed Logan’s skin. “Lo?”
“Ouais, I…” Logan gave up on words and tucked his face into Finn’s neck, laughing.
Leo leaned back in his chair, glad the table let him stretch his still plane-cramped legs out under the table. “It’s so nice to see you up there. Really. I can’t wait for tomorrow. You just look so…free.”
“We feel free,” Finn said. “And it’s thanks to you.” He held out a hand across the linen tablecloth and, after a moment, Leo took it. “How are you, Le?”
Leo let out a slow breath, watching the way Finn’s thumb tracked across his knuckles. “I’m…” He laughed a little. “That’s quite a question. Really quite a question.”
Logan laughed, and when Leo realized he was laughing at him, he threw a sugar coated almond at him in a neat arc across the table—which lost all its effect when Logan caught it in his mouth.
“Non, seriously.” Logan leaned more into Finn’s side. “Leo?”
Leo looked around them. They both had a knack for finding these slices of paradise. Though, lately it had been feeling like any where they were was heaven, even his own kitchen.
“Being on tour with you was wonderful,” Leo answered. “And Nice was, of course, perfect. So beautiful…God, this is beautiful.”
“Why am I sensing a but?” Finn asked, brows drawn together. Logan looked downright nervous.
Leo shook his head, bringing his other hand to hold Finn’s as well. “No. Well, yes, but not like that.”
They both looked at him expectantly. Patiently.
“You’ve been sweet in waiting for me. And honest about wanting me.”
“We fumbled and recovered,” Finn said.
“We do want you,” Logan said earnestly.
“Well, I…I hope so,” Leo said softly. Finn’s hand tightened around his.
“Yeah?” Finn whispered.
Leo nodded. Logan couldn’t quite reach with the angle, but he reached for Leo, too, hand on Finn’s wrist.
“It’s been—what? A week and a half of video calls? You know all these glorious places are amazing, but when we’re just sitting around…I mean, when we’re just talking… Or you’re watching me wash dishes, do laundry. And I start to feel like…”
He felt the words well in his throat like tears as he looked between them. He understood Cassie’s hesitation. He understood his own hesitation. He’d been nervous that he’d come back and something would have changed. Like adrenaline leaving the system. But it hadn’t.
“I’ve never not known how to be without someone before,” Leo said. “But you make me feel like I don’t remember how to be alone.”
Finn’s smile was tearful and Leo realized he felt a little like that, too, even as Finn leaned forward and kissed him. It dissolved into a laugh, into kiss to his cheek. A piece of silverware clattered to the ground as Finn tugged Leo’s chair closer and hugged him as best he could.
“Rouge, you’re pulling the table cloth, the table—” Logan’s voice came, laughing. Leo heard his chair scoot back and then there was another pair of arms around Leo’s neck, Logan leaning over the back of his chair. He managed a sloppy kiss to Leo’s mouth, despite the angle.
Leo closed his eyes and held on. He waited for Finn to make him laugh. Or Logan to say something in French. But they stayed quiet, surprising him. He peeked one eye open, only to see that Finn, whose forehead was pressed against Leo’s temple, had his eyes closed, too. Leo didn’t dare move him to try and get at Logan, but the content sigh he felt against his neck was enough to go on for him. Wind whistled through the trees around them, bring the smell of some sweet flower. Leo closed his eyes again and leaned back into Logan’s shoulder and Finn’s arm. It was like a blanket, their quiet. They’d been more serene than he’d expected from the beginning—puzzles, dinner, reading, morning runs. This was something deeper. It was as if something unhappy had finally been able to settle for them, too. The questions were still there. How will this work? What will people think? But they were muted and far off.
They looked up at footsteps on the patio, only to find a surprised waiter holding a pitcher of water.
“Ah,” the waiter said. “Pardon me. Uh…”
“Hi,” Finn said, only lifting his head. “Yeah, we’ll take the check.”
~
They laughed about it on the car ride home, the waiter’s face. Speeding through dark hills, and then streets still filled with chatter and light. Leo watched out the window as they slowed in narrower streets. It gave him a glimpses of passing faces. Laughing, eating, kissing.
Finn’s hand pressed to his thigh. “Are you composing sentences right now? I think you are.”
Leo looked over at him. “Maybe. And you?”
“I’ve been watching you two write in your heads for the last ten minutes,” Logan said. He’d stretched his legs out so their feet slotted together in the car space between them.
“Well, no one got on my lap, I had to do something to pass the time,” Leo said, squeezing one of Logan’s ankles between his own.
Logan just looked at him with bright eyes. “I don’t want to have to stop.”
Leo let his head fall back against the seat and he put his hand over Finn’s. “You just deal with that every day?”
“All day,” Finn said. “You don’t even want to know the things he says to me before we go on stage.” Finn laughed and scooted over in his seat, pressing right up against Leo’s side. “Actually, you probably do.”
No one was waiting at the hotel this time. There were no bright flashes to catch what Leo was sure was an intense flush on his cheeks. They stayed close in the elevator, their security shaking their heads at how giddy they probably sounded—all that content silence had bubbled into talking over each other and far too loud laughter. Finn fumbled a little with the hotel key, but then they were inside the suite and met with a blast of AC. Finn went to turn it down, but Logan got his hands on Leo’s waist and pulled until Leo had him pinned right up against the side of the entrance hall.
“This is how I first met you,” Leo said, staring down at him. He traced a hand under Logan’s jaw and watched the way he bared his neck for more. “I was so surprised. And you were so beautiful. And also you literally did not stop making out with Finn which was, like, okay then.”
Finn’s laugh reached them. “I asked him that after you left. I was like, how long was he standing there actually? And he wouldn’t tell me.”
“What’d you want, Lo?” Leo whispered, leaning down to kiss him softly. “Me to walk in ready to go right then?”
“Non, I wanted to see if you thought I was hot,” Logan said, then laughed as Leo pulled back to follow Finn’s voice into the living room. He called after him, “And you do!”
Finn had his dress shirt half unbuttoned and his belt in one hand, frowning at something on his phone.
“You okay there difficult rock star?” Leo asked, trying not to stare at his pale chest against the blush color.
Finn looked up, all big brown eyes suddenly—how did he do that? Switch between unbearably hot to unbearably sweet in two seconds—and smiled. “Oh. This isn’t what it looks like.” He gestured to himself with his belt. “I just wanted to change. And yeah, just tomorrow’s call times.”
Call times. Show tomorrow. Leo took a breath. Right. What time was it? Midnight? One? Leo knew they should sleep. He’d seen them on the nights before shows many times now. Logan drank mint tea. Finn read. Unless they had friends at the shows, or family, they tried to get as much sleep as they could. Logan slept in as much as he could. Finn seemed incapable of sleeping in, but he went for a run and he ordered up a big breakfast. God, Leo wanted to make them breakfast again. He wanted the way they sat with him, looked at him, made him coffee.
Leo nodded. He emptied his pockets, setting his phone and wallet on a side table. “I hope it’s not too early? I know your routines the night before a show and this isn’t it. It’s early for me, technically. But it’s late for you.”
Leo’s eyes drew down Finn’s body again. The half-untucked shirt. He was pretty sure those socks he was wearing were the ones advertised on TV offering arch support. Why, why was that hot right now? It was. And maybe Leo wanted the way Finn looked right now to be exactly what it looked like. What then?
Finn was quiet, glancing at Logan as he came into the room and sat on the back of the couch to look at Leo. Finn drew in a slow breath, stretching his arms up and behind his head, so that when he spoke his voice came out tensed like his muscles—which Leo could see more of now, the sharp cut just above his waistline. “I mean, you could…” He grinned, dropping his arms and relaxing. “We could get you on the right time zone.”
Leo bit at the inside of his cheek. That wasn’t exactly the line he’d heard in Finn’s voice during all of his laundry-folding day dreams, but it was so very Finn that it was better.
“What did your team think when you said I’d be staying with you?” Leo glanced up around the room. “I mean, in the same…” Bedroom? “Suite.”
“They’re our team for a reason,” Finn said. “They know what’s their business, and what’s ours.”
Leo raised an eyebrow. “And my being a reporter isn’t their business? I bet at least a few people would disagree with that.”
“You’re not the kind of reporter they worry about,” Logan said. “Unless you suddenly revealed a long-range camera in your suitcase.” He tilted his head teasingly. “That’s not the surprise, is it?”
“No,” Leo laughed. “Definitely not the surprise.”
“And just to be clear,” Finn said. “Because looks like we’re not great on being clear—”
“Room, not suite,” Logan cut in.
“Jeez, way to grab my punchline and yank it out from beneath my feet.” Finn strode closer and put his hand on Logan’s shoulder. “But yes. We were hoping…I mean, there is another room. Two other, in fact, for you to choose from.” He tilted his head. “But I was hoping just your suitcase would be staying there.”
“We,” Logan said, rising from his seat.
“We were hoping.”
Logan stood in front of Leo. He held out his hands palm up, and Leo put his palms into them. Logan gave a gentle tug. When Leo hesitated, worrying the inside of his cheek, it took about half a second for concern to flicker over Logan’s face.
“Le?” he asked gently. “What…What did I do?”
“No, no, no,” Leo said. “Nothing. I want that. I really, really want that. I just…” Leo sighed, cursing himself. The nerves he’d felt while packing sprung back at him. Look at them. Look at them.
“It’s been a while for me,” Leo said softly. “I mean—I mean a while. And you two know each other—so well. I just don’t want…to, like, disappoint, or…”
“Non,” Logan said.
“You couldn’t,” Finn added. “Leo, you couldn’t disappoint us. Like, ever.”
Leo knew that. He did. He even believed it. It didn’t stop the idea that he would from making him want to crawl under the covers and hide.
“I’m looking at two people who know each other inside and out,” Leo said. “And I love that about you two. But—yeah. That’s all.”
Finn and Logan looked at each other. Leo didn’t mind the silent communication ability. He even liked it. It was sweet. In his dreams, he got that ability with them, too. One day.
Finn stepped forward. It wasn’t the stage walk. It was just him. Even in the button-down that Leo now knew to be the softest linen, it was just him. Not all the photos Leo had seen of fans catching him on the street—sunglasses, t-shirt, notebook or coffee…smiling, talking with them, and uncapping Sharpies with his teeth. Leo had looked at the photos from that particular day a lot. A lot. Summer in New York, headed to the recording studio, stooping so a girl could slip a necklace she had made him over his head.
“Okay.” Finn smiled softly. “There’s one thing we can do no matter what. It’s late. We can just get ready for bed and…and then whatever you want.”
Logan nodded. “Whatever you want.”
“We do know each other through and through,” Finn said. He tucked a stray curl behind Leo’s ear, but Leo felt it spring back into place. “Which is why we know how much we want you here.”
Leo shook his head, putting a hand against Finn’s chest. “You don’t have to convince me. I’m just…” Leo looked to Logan. “I…This is like a dream? A really good dream.”
“Leo.” Finn’s voice was overly serious, but Leo caught the spark in his eye. “Were we your celebrity crushes or something?” 
Leo’s laugh surprised him, head falling back. “Finn.”
“Aw,” Finn wrapped his arms around Leo’s waist. “I embarrassed him. Look, Lo, we were his celebrity crush.”
“First, I meant because you’re so sweet. And second, I’m pretty sure you could attempt world domination with the number of people who would name you if asked who their crush is,” Leo said.
“Maybe,” Finn replied. “But I only care about one.”
It was the little things, first. Logan left small pools of water all around the sink when he washed his face. He went to Leo’s luggage, and Leo only had time to call out a warning don’t before Logan was pulling out a t-shirt with a delighted laugh. Thankfully, it wasn’t his surprise one…But it was Finn’s.
Leo was brushing his teeth next to Finn O’Hara in Italy, and Logan Tremblay was holding up his HEARTTHROB O’HARA t-shirt with a grin on his face that said it all.
“That was also a surprise,” Leo said around his toothpaste. He groaned, and put a hand over Finn’s delighted eyes as passed him to go rinse his mouth.
When he leaned up from the faucet, Finn was there, rinsing beside him. Leo cleared his throat, laughing a little under the feeling of Finn’s gaze. He tried to escape, honestly he had no idea what to say, but two hands caught his hips and a hard, warm chest met Leo’s back.
They looked at each other in the mirror. The lights were soft and dim, bringing out each of Finn’s freckles. Leo put his hand over where Finn’s rested low on his stomach.
“I’m embarrassed,” Leo said, smiling down at the sink. “It’s stupid, right?”
With a slight pressure to his hip, Finn turned Leo around. Leo rested back against the counter’s edge, and Finn nudged his way to stand between his thighs. He carded Leo’s hair back from his face, the ends damp from washing his face.
“Nothing about you could ever be stupid,” Finn said.
Leo traced the N of his NASA t-shirt, then one of the trails on a shooting star. “You probably see people in that shirt all the time. Probably have signed that shirt a million times.” Leo closed his eyes. “Shit. I’d say I’m not some crazy fan, but younger me was definitely a crazy fan.” He looked up at Finn. “But you know all about crazy fans.”
Finn smiled a little. He barely had to tilt his chin forward at all to brush their mouths together. “I do know a little about that.”
“So maybe the shirt doesn’t even matter?” Leo asked hopefully. Finn’s brown eyes were staring at his mouth—that still had toothpaste on it maybe?
“Everything about you matters,” Finn said, and kissed him.
It brought back the rush of the ocean. The heat of the sun, sitting against those cliffs when Leo had been so confused, so in want. He knew how to hold himself together. God, if there was one thing he was so very good at in this world, it was holding himself together.
“Maybe I’m your crazy fan,” Finn whispered. “I’ve been stalking your writing for long enough.”
Leo laughed. “Mm, that’s true.” He reached up for Finn’s shoulders, pulling him closer.
He didn’t want to hold himself together anymore. He didn’t want to hold back. Nothing he knew even compared to this. Not the fame, not the novelty. This. Worn out t-shirts and getting to have a perfect fit in a legendary love like theirs. These were new muscles, letting himself go, and he’d been straining them with these two. They felt stronger now.
The band of his pajama pants was wet from being pressed back into Logan’s puddles. Finn tasted minty, and with him standing between Leo’s thighs like this, Leo got to tilt his head up into the kiss.
“How do I look?”
They broke apart to see Logan standing in the bathroom doorway. He wore a soft looking pair of gray boxers, and his chest and arms filled out Leo’s t-shirt in a way Leo had never, would never have even thought, to imagine.
While Leo sat there staring, Finn laughed. “That thing looks like it’s about to fall to pieces.”
He wasn’t wrong. There was a hole near the collar, the letters were faded at the edges. But it was so damn soft from years of being washed that Leo couldn’t bare to part with it. He reached up and pushed his fingers through Finn’s hair. That gorgeous red hair. Maybe there was so much more he couldn’t part with now.
“Ouais, me too,” Logan said. Leo didn’t know what he was talking about until he walked forward and reached up for Finn’s hair, completely messing it up. “Everyone’s obsessed with it, but how can you not be?”
Leo laughed as Finn squinted one eye shut but let them have their fun. It was soft and thick, the sorter strands at the sides feathering through Leo’s fingers like velvet.
Finn put a hand on Logan’s chest, tapping over the letters of Leo’s t-shirt. “I always guessed that was why everything they put my name in is red, too.”
“Marketing?” Leo said.
“Yeah.” Finn sighed, shrugged, then smiled. “Le, that shirt really is about to fall apart.”
“I…wear it a lot.”
“Oh yeah? All around the city with my name on your heart?”
Leo bit his lip. It was more than that. It was what he wore when he was sad, or had had a bad day. When he was sick, or exhausted, or angry.
And then, over the past month, that comfort had shifted to them. A bad day at work ended with four hour FaceTimes until Leo was too sleepy to talk anymore and Finn’s soft voice. Goodnight, Sunshine. And when he couldn’t sleep, somehow Logan always knew. The soft light of his phone lighting up his bedroom from his nightstand and never letting him feel alone or sinking or like he would never sleep again.
“Le?” Finn asked softly. His hair was a mess from their hands. His eyes were pure syrup again, asking, checking, worried—loving?
“Hi,” Leo said. “Sorry, hi.” He put a hand on Finn’s cheek and looked at Logan.
Logan tilted his head. “What are you writing right now, Soleil?”
Leo closed his eyes briefly at the nickname, leaning his head back to bask in it. “Dialogue, I guess.”
“Ouais,” Logan said, wrapping an arm around Leo’s waist. It completed the circle of the three of them. “Of?”
“How to ask you to take me to bed,” Leo whispered.
“Yes,” Finn breathed, and then Leo was being kissed.
He’d written a lot of words in his life. It was almost funny to be asked what he was writing right then. He wasn’t even sure this was something that could be written. What did kiss have on what Finn gave him? It was just what Leo remembered. The heated energy from that middle of the night kiss in Nice, only tripled.
“Hey.” Logan’s voice was low. Leo felt fingers tighten in his hair and he gasped, breaking Finn’s kiss long enough to be pulled to another mouth. The ocean and the shade. The shade and the ocean. Finn’s laugh echoed against the bathroom tiles. He was watching them. He had a hand on Leo’s back, and probably Logan’s, and let them kiss.
No, Leo couldn’t have written this down. Logan, pulling him towards the bedroom. Finn flicking off the bathroom light and leaving them in the yellow-pink glow of a reading lamp and the moon.
“I’d raise the sun if I could,” he said. He caught Leo up around the waist again. “Just because it’s dark in here doesn’t mean I want it to be.”
“Finn.” It sounded pleading, but Leo hadn’t meant it that way. Not stop. Not more. Just… “Have some compassion for how full my heart can be right now, O’Hara.”
And then Leo took that famous NASA t-shirt right off of him. The stars and the comet trails, they were still there. Finn’s torso was its own sky map and Leo, wondering what Finn liked, bent to kiss a trail of his own along one thin collarbone.
What words existed for the feeling of Finn chest rising and falling against his mouth.
What words could Leo have used to describe the smile Logan gave him as he let Leo pull his t-shirt off of him next? All Leo could comprehend was the sheer strength of his arms and the dark trail of hair that led down into his boxers.
There were no hesitations, like Leo had thought there would be. The pauses were woven in, just turns and folds and lifts like pages. Yes? This? Grins and breaths and—Logan’s sounds. Logan. Logan knew what he wanted. Finn knew what Logan wanted. Leo, very quickly, knew what Logan wanted and shared a slightly dazed grin with Finn about it. He got to watch Finn’s practiced fingers, and see how much Finn enjoyed giving Logan everything he could possibly desire. It was as sweet as it was unbearably hot. Finn looked so pale against Logan’s tanned skin. Marble. That was a word Leo had used before, but it applied. Jesus Christ, it applied.
What did grip have on the way Logan clutched at Leo’s shoulders when they were at last as close as anything could be, his thighs shaking against Leo’s. Bliss, certainly, was nothing compared to the look on Logan’s face when Finn’s hand pressed over the strong curve of his adam’s apple and asked him how he liked it, told him they looked gorgeous. Throbbing held nothing to the way Leo’s heart pounded, and more than nothing to how close those words brought him to the edge. Rhythm. That’s what Logan had. Leo set his hands against the small of his back—two dimples there, made for Leo’s thumbs—and held on.
“Mm—” Logan’s breath came out short and he froze, mouth open against Leo’s neck. His back was slick with sweat now. Finn sat back on his heels just beside them, working himself slowly.
“What you waiting for, baby?” Finn breathed. He’d not been moving much, but there was a sheen over his nose and temples, too. Just from watching. Now, he shifted behind Leo and wrapped his arms around his waist, nuzzling under his jaw.
Leo reached between them and Logan muffled his sound in Leo’s neck. Logan hadn’t been warm from the second he met him, but oh, he was warm now. Burning in Leo’s hands, against Leo’s body.
“I just want it to last,” Logan said shakily, but he was moving again, like he couldn’t help it. “You’re leaving in two days.” Logan wrapped his arms fully around Leo’s shoulders. “Don’t.”
“Don’t even know how—” Leo’s eyes slipped shut and he tried to breathe through the mix of white hot pleasure and blue tenderness pulsing through him. “How to think about leaving.” He smoothed his hands up Logan’s back, feeling the way it flexed as Logan moved against him.
“Ouais,” Logan said, a smile slipping across his face. He pulled back, his breathing jumping as their hips shifted. He kissed Leo hard, then cursed softly and let his head fall back. “Fuck…Leo…”
With his hair falling back and out of his eyes like that, Leo’s language left him entirely. He’d seen him like this on stage, lost in the music. He’d watched from the VIP booth, from the wings. Logan was closer to him than Finn was, always staying in one place. He’d seen the lights catch his every angle as he threw his head back, sweat dampening his dark hair, and played with everything he had. Tonight, Leo felt like theirs in that same way.
The sheets were kicked towards the end of the bed, or pooled on the floor. Leo’s head was on Finn’s chest, Logan’s forehead pressed to the top of his spine. Leo couldn’t stop touching them. He trailed his fingertips down Finn’s chest and watched goosebumps follow in their wake. Logan had a thigh thrown over his hip and Leo stroked the unbearably soft skin behind his knee. He dipped his thumb in the divot below Finn’s bottom lip.
Finn smiled sleepily, his eyes closed. His eyelashes were dark just now. In certain lights they tinged lighter, like his hair. “You’re ticklish.”
“You’re soft,” Leo replied.
“Is he asleep?” Finn whispered.
“Non,” came Logan’s voice, though he sounded part of the way there.
“I’m not kidding.” Leo reached back to hold Logan’s hip. “I’m getting up if I start keeping you awake with my tossing around.”
That was a lie. There was nothing that could haul Leo out of where he was right now.
“Nu-uh.” Finn kissed Leo’s temple. “No tossing. Not with the weighted blanket I have.”
“You travel with a weighted blanket?” Leo asked skeptically.
Finn reached out and picked up Logan’s hand, kissing his knuckles. “Sure do.”
“Oh,” Leo laughed.
“One-hundred percent effective, I promise.”
When Finn turned the lights off, it sent the room into near complete darkness and so Leo could do nothing but feel, in every nerve, and expanse of exposed skin, the way Logan nudged his nose into the soft hair at his nape, and the way Finn rolled onto his side to hold them both.
“Show tomorrow,” Finn whispered. “You ready?”
Leo smiled. “Do I have to be ready? I think that’s supposed my question to you two.”
“You have to be ready,” Finn placed a kiss to his neck. “It’s a Leo show.”
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simonsrileyhusband · 2 days
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heya!! I have a request, but it's more of a specific scenario if you're okay with it?
I had that scenario in mind for days, but basically-- reader is Simon's husband for years now and Simon did everything to keep him secret and out of harm's way in any way he could.
141 Task Force is debriefing after a long mission until the comms crackles to life and someone's voice comes through and says smth like "Simon, hows the husband?" first off outing Simon before the 141 force
and essentially it just turns out its a guy they failed to kill on the previous mission and he went after reader instead to try and get back what 141 took :D
Im sorry if it's too long or bothersome!! Feel free to change anything as you please or ignore this if it doesn't give you any inspiration !
dark-ish simon and supportive task 141: (violence and... "offing" someone)
simon got a text from a random number, a granny and low quality picture of his home, you in your little light blue apron in the kitchen, preparing something for dinner.
his heart started to bear faster than ever, his fist gripping thightly around his bear bottle, almost breaking it. price quicks him out of his frozen state.
"ya' good mate?"
simon doesnt answer, he stands up grabbing the keys to his truck and speeds to your shared home. he didnt even noticed he left his phone at the table. soap takes a quick look at it, a little message below the text read: ill make you pay, your husband will have a little visit from me.
"husband? ghost has a husband?"
"shut up kyle, grab yer things, we have to help him."
when the rest of them arrive there is nothing they can do. simon is repitedly punching the face of a limp body, his breath is steady, his movements methodical, if you had to describe the scene to someone who wasnt there, you'll tell them he looked like a hungry wolf tearing up a lamb, rabid and groteque.
the 3 men had to pull them away from the breathless body of the guy that thought of harming his husband. they gave simon a understanding look.
"go with him, we'll take care of.... this." simon nods at princes comment, taking a few seconds to steady his racing mind. he saw the body get thrown into the back of soaps car, he watched them leave, he walked home, his heaby boots heavy on the wooden floor of the porch, the same boots that broke the bones of that men.
he entered home, the smell of meat and smashed potatoes filled the air. he went to the kitchen and hugged you tightly, his hands gripping your shirt and apron, as if he let go of you, you will dissapear.
"hi~ i thought you were gonna be out for a little longer, dinner isnt ready yet."
"mhm...." his nose has buried in your neck, taking every smell on you, your lavander soap, your sweat, the smell of meat that was stuck on you, the smell of the new shampoo you bought...
"honey, is everything okay?"
"it is now."
"simon... is that blood on your shirt?"
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in1-nutshell · 3 days
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Hello, how are you? Can I request a Nightlight application in Transformers One? Nightlight works for Sentinel Prime. In this universe, she sympathizes with the lower classes and is dedicated to trying to convince Sentinel Prime to improve things. Nightlight becomes friends with D-16 Orion Pax Eliata One and Bumblebee?
I definitely want to do a longer version of this later in the future. Or possible a part 2, which ever comes first.
Hope you enjoy!
TF1 Version of Nightlight
SFW, Platonic, Cybertronian reader
TF1
Nightlight considered herself one of the luckier bots in Iacon.
She had a stable job and got to work under most of Sentinel Prime’s direct orders.
Not many bots could say they often talked to the Prime on a daily basis.
He was the bot everyone wanted or wanted to be.
She could only hope the mech that seemed larger than life could get behind her ‘passion project’.
Nightlight straightening her backstruts, puts on her best smile and salutes to the incoming Prime. Nightlight: “Good morning, Sentinel Prime, sir.” Sentinel smiles at the detective. Sentinel: “Nightlight, my friend. How’s my best detective doing today?” Nightlight passing him some data slugs. Nightlight: “The missing archive collection has been found and safely put back in its rightful place, sir. Also the missing bot cases have been solved and filed.” Sentinel: “And the—” Nightlight: “The cargo hold carts are still under repairs and under investigation as we speak.” Sentinel: “Good, good, take the rest of the day off then, you earned it.” Nightlight: “Actually sir, I was wondering if we could talk about the conditions of the miners—” Sentinel puts a servo out motioning her to be quiet. Sentinel: “Nightlight, Nightlight, Nightlight. How many times do we have to go through with this little ‘passion project’ of yours? The miners will get more accommodation when they reach more of the energon goals set. It’s only fair, no?” Nightlight: “But sir, wouldn’t they work better, faster even, if they had better conditions or equipment—” Arachnid suddenly appears on their right. Arachnid: “Sir, it is time to go.” Sentinel gives the detective a ‘sorry’ smile. Sentinel: “Its time for me to leave. Keep up the good work Nightlight!” Nightlight was about to protest when she was cut off by Arachnid staring at her as the pair left the room.
Her project started the day she met a peculiar pair of miners.
She was responding to an alert of an unauthorized miner entering the Archives.
Nightlight watched from afar Darkwing and another guard chasing this one cogless miner bot.
And quite frankly, he was giving the guards a run for their shanix.
She noticed another miner causing a distraction with his cart while the other escaped the guards.
The pair then met up in one of the train stations, probably to go back to work.
It was quite entertaining honestly.
Later, she went back to the Archive’s to see what exactly the miner was looking through.
It surprised her the number of data slugs he had gone through in relation to the Matrix.
One of Cybertron’s biggest mysteries.
She needed more answers.
Eventually, Nightlight got clearance to ‘supervise’ some miners for a shift.
That’s where she met Elita-One
Elita saluting at the taller bot. Elita: “Nightlight ma’am!” Nightlight: “Oh, just Nightlight will do… umm…” Elita still saluting: “Elita-One ma’am—I mean—” Nighlight: “Its all right. Do you mind giving me the tour then?” Elita: “Of course! Follow me!”
While doing the tour, Nightlight was making a mental list of things to improve.
She hadn’t been down in the mines before and already couldn’ imagine working down here for long hours and with rusting equipment.
Out of the corner of her optic, she spotted Darkwing punching two familiar looking miners.
When the tour was down and Elita had to go back to her team, Nightlight slipped into the miner’s medbay.
After scaring some bots, she finally found the two miners.
D-16 and Orion both looked at her in shock and amaze. Orion: “You’re Nightlight!” D-16: “The Nightlight! You solved several cases and foiled several assassinations attempts of several bots, including Sentinel Prime’s!” Nightlight feels a bit flustered by the sudden fan behavior. Nightlight: “Yeah, that’s me. And you two are the sneaky miner’s who snuck into the Archieve’s and got away with it.” Both mech’s suddenly looked frightened. Nightlight: “Relax, I’m not taking you in or punishing you two. It was actually the most entertaining things that happened on my shift in a while.” Orion and D-16’s optics widen. Orion: “You saw all that? But from where? The crowds weren’t that busy and there was no hiding places nearby?” D-16: “Do you have any cloaking technology?” Nightlight: “What? No, and to answer your question, I was simply observing from afar.” Nightlight shows the pair some grappling hooks in her arm plating. Nightlight: “These come in handy when you don’t have a flying alt mode or jetpack nearby.” D-16: “Primus…” Orion: “Wait, wait, if you’re not punishing us, then what are you here for?” Nightlight slips into a grim expression. Nightlight: “I originally came in to ask you about your snooping around for data slugs on the Matrix… instead I just found out today your working conditions and I don’t like it one bit.
Nightlight explained that she would straight to Sentinel himself and talk to him about getting them better working conditions.
 Truthfully D-16 and Orion thought this was a lie… but his was Nightlight they were talking about.
Maybe a little bit of faith would help.
Surely enough the miners started to notice some of the older equipment getting replaced with new ones.
They even had an extra hour of sleep and a bit more rations.
This did not satisfy Nightlight though.
She wanted more.
The detective started taking on bigger assignments in order to get on Sentinel’s personal circle.
She might have better luck in getting the miner’s more things that way.
Soon Nightlight started making her way into the mines without authorization.
Something was up, she could feel it.
Not only did she find out that the improvements had halted, but Sentinel was making more and more trips to the surface.
It was enough bells to set her off.
Especially hearing about 10 more sublevels under waste management.
So, Nightlight did the thing she did best, investigate.
Nightlight enters one of the waste trains cargo carts. Suddenly gets her blaster out hearing yelling behind her. The door opens revealing Orion, D-16, Elita and B-127. The detective looks at them in surprise. Nightlight: “What in Primus’s name is going on! Orion! D! Elita! B!” Elita:”Ma’am! I caught these bots trespassing!” D-16: “Wait, how do you know B?” B-127 waves at the detective. B-127: “Hi!” Nightlight: “He gave me some information on the sublevels under waste management. Now someone explain what—” Elita sprints past her. Elita: “Sorry ma’am! I need to turn this train around!” Orion and the others run after her. Nightlight blinks a bit before joining the chase. Nightlight: “This is what you get for making friends who are younger than you Nightlight… always running off… I swear… I need to listen to Ratchet next time I go out without my long-distance com link…” Nightlight starts climbing the trains railing to reach the others. Nightlight: “The one day I don’t bring my extra long grappling hook… I won’t be surprised if I see Alpha Trion at this point…”
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What are your hair headcanons for the chain? I personally think Wild, Wars and Legend have the longest hair but thats just because I think Legend's hat is full of hair he just pretends isnt there so he doesnt havd to brush it(warriors is going to kill him when he realizes)
Oooooh nice!!
I think Wild’s is definitely the longest, no contest. And I don’t think it’s THICK, it’s just dense. Like, the individual strands are rather fine, and his hair is soft and silky but he’s got a LOT of it. It’s definitely waist length, and has a slight natural wave to it, and he’s a natural dirty blonde. He’s experimented with temporary dyes because he got bored though. Also he does a lot with his hair and he takes really good care of it! It’s not HIS fault he wiped out and fell in a bush and got a bunch of sticks in it 😔
Second longest for me is Time, whose hair to me goes about two inches past his collar bone. He’s a warmer toned blond, and the color is completely natural, he doesn’t do much to his hair. I hc he has bad sensory issues and his hair can sometimes really bother his neck, but if he cut it short he’d never make it through growing it out again so when it bothers him he ties it up off his neck. Any hairstyles he does don’t have a WHOLE lot of thought put into them, but Malon and Wars have done pretty things with his hair before and he enjoyed it. He just can’t do that for himself. I also hc his hair is very thick and naturally wavy and Wars is constantly one toe over the line crossing into GENUINE jealously because Time does NOTHING and his hair just looks incredible and it hurts Wars to know that if he out just a Little effort into it it would look even better
Legend’s is about the same length as Time’s but most of it is always tied up and/or shoved into his hat. He’s naturally strawberry blond, and his hair is thick but pretty straight. It would hold a curl if he did curl it though, and he’s (of course) dyed it a few times in his life
We all know Four’s fuckass /pos bob. What an absolute legend I love his haircut. I hc his hair is very thin and fine, but it has that really pretty silky quality to it? It’s the type of stick straight hair that won’t curl even if you spray it to death and say a prayer. Its a cooler toned blond and it’s a lighter color than any of the other naturally blond Links
Hyrule to me has very dark 3c hair and if he pulls on it to straighten it out then he for sure beats Time for second place, but where his hair actually like falls to is right at his shoulders. Like it just rests at his shoulders. He had to learn to take care of it before he let it get that long because it was just kinda hard for a 10 yo kid to care for when he was so on his own, but he’s got the hang of it now and he’s really happy with how it looks. He doesn’t often do too much with it in terms of styling but sometimes he’ll braid it because it is kinda annoying to have to pick sticks out of it when he and Wild take a tumble and both walk back to camp FULL of sticks and then Warriors has to help the both of them
Sky’s hair to me has natural loose curls and is a fairly dark, slightly red toned brown. It’s very thick and just brushes his shoulders. It’s long enough that he can tie it back if he wants to, but he usually doesn’t because its so thick his arms will get sore from spending so much time trying to tie it back in a way that doesn’t look absolutely atrocious because theres just so MUCH of it and its hard to handle
Warriors’s is similar to Sky’s in length, and it’s naturally very thick, dark and curly, but he straightens and bleaches it to death. His roots are a very dark brown, but he does his best to cover that up. He also tries very hard to keep his hair as nice as possible and do what he can to prevent further damage. It’s curlier than Sky’s is naturally, but when it starts to curl up again it because of humidity or because he didn’t straighten it very successfully it looks a bit similar
Wind is a different styling technique away from a bowl cut. His hair is curly as fuck, not QUITE as curly as Hyrule’s is but definitely close, and his hair is naturally brown but has been highlighted and appears very blond. His roots are clearly brown, but not as dark as Warriors’s. His hair is very thick and hard to manage and Wars taught him how to care for it properly so after the journey when he’s more confident in how it looks, he lets it grow out past his shoulders. I hc Wars helped him LOVE his hair
Twilight is out here fighting demons but the demons are him. His hair is thick as hell AND dense as fuck, and it’s a bit wavy. It doesn’t listen to him, ever. He can’t so much as PART it differently because it’s gonna do what it’s gonna do. His hair was naturally a reddish brown, not a super dark color but definitely brown, but since the transformation he has a constantly dark roots no matter HOW much his hair seems to grow out, and his hair still has a red tone to it but he thinks it looks darker. It also takes him forever to wash his scalp because his hair refuses to let the water in anywhere and he gets a bit annoyed. Length wise you CAN see the back of his neck a bit, and it was definitely cut like, around his head in the sense that it’s not just layered with the intention of it hanging down long. the hair coming from the top of his head which is the longest part of his haircut are like 6 inches long MAX
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yurinaa-world · 1 day
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"𝐼𝓉'𝓈 𝒿𝓊𝓈𝓉 𝒶 𝒸𝒽𝑒𝒶𝓅 𝒸𝑜𝓅𝓎!"
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💫𝒞𝒽𝒶𝓇𝒶𝒸𝓉𝑒𝓇𝓈: Rafayel & Sylus x Gender-neutral reader
💫𝒮𝓎𝓃𝑜𝓅𝓈𝒾𝓈: a little doll
💫𝒲𝒶𝓇𝓃𝒾𝓃𝑔𝓈: Fluff, & Spelling mistakes
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💫𝑅𝒶𝒻𝒶𝓎𝑒𝓁 "𝒯𝒽𝑒 𝒜𝒷𝓎𝓈𝓈𝓌𝒶𝓁𝓀𝑒𝓇"
A doll of him
Such a faulty doll, the shade of his hair wasn't even correct—the purple was far too dark to suit him, the colour of his eyes were completely wrong, and the clothes they designed for the little plushie were atrocious, yet, even after he dissected all of its faultiness you still find it so adorable.
So adorable to the point you want to keep it, it feels like a slap in the face for him that willingly chose to keep that plushie of him when you could have the real thing. Don’t mind him sulking, why don’t you play with your new “lover” since you love him so much? What is he talking about? Seriously, are you gaslighting him as well? Arent you self-aware enough to realize you're cheating? How shameless.
“You have to pick, between me or that thing!” 
What is even happening right now?... he’s crossing his arms and protesting you over a knock-off plushie that looks like him… ”Rafayel, what are you talking about?” you tilt your head to the suede in confusion while the culprit of the outburst is in your hands, having the time of its life.
“Don’t play dumb, you’re showing that thing more than me! And I'm your lover!” he chided, a nasty scowl on his face would make anyone think it was something serious but, this was so childish…
“I’m not showing it more love than you.”
“You so are!” he banters back, staring at the doll more than your face with such venom in his eyes. 
“I’m not!”
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💫𝒮𝓎𝓁𝓊𝓈 "𝒯𝒽𝑒 𝐻𝑒𝒶𝒹 𝒪𝒻 𝒪𝓃𝓎𝒸𝒽𝒾𝓃𝓊𝓈"
A doll of you
It’s embarrassing how he has a small little doll of you, sitting right on the table while he reads his books. He made sure you looked just like you as if you were turned into a doll, with the exact hair colour, eye colour, and a pretty little outfit along with a pretty smile on its lips.
It’s so uncanny to you, that you want to take it away from him, which is something Sylus refuses to let you have, since if it’s something that gets you easily riled up, then he’ll gladly keep on throwing gasoline into the fire. 
“Give it here,” you demand, holding your hand for the plushie, which he just smirks at you, looking at the plushie in his hand, going to hand it to you, before only ripping it away from your grasp the second you got near and putting it high in the sky. You could feel your face fuming while you jumped and got on the tips of your toes to retrieve it only shot down by Sylus' height. 
“Just give it.” you seethed in venom, while he grins back at your desperate attempts. “I don’t remember this little thing being bought by you.” he hummed, shaking it above to get you more fired up, “Well, when you make it look like me, it’s reasonable that I get some of the share.” you sneered, your body was against his—as if were some kind of support for your body, yet still all you attempts were unsuccessful.
“If it gets you this fired up, how about I keep it? You look quite good when your angry and desperate.”
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if you liked this, consider tipping me on ko-fi! it'd mean a lot!
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bigfatbimbo · 1 day
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Hey there! @hazbinhotelmollykisser here yet again, with the promised bill rambles :)
Forgive me if the following words sound like nonsense, I'm trying lol
SO. I'll be covering the bill with a more powerful reader and sub bill because your works have changed my brain chemistry, masochist bill because I'M GOING INSANE AN I NEED TO BE SEDATED, and bill with a reader that likes to tease him (with a more powerful reader version and a just a human version) because I need to study his reactions to teasing like I'm Stanford studying like... Science + math = triangles or something.
・Bill x More powerful reader
So I actually made an entire oc for this literally as soon as I finished reading the og post, which I will refrain on ranting abt, but the idea of a reader that's more powerful than bill is fascinating to me.
Because like, he's bill so he's obviously gonna try to get under your skin, but imagine a reader that sees his attempts to annoy them and just... Like laughs? A reader that finds his attempts almost endearing? Reverting whatever bill did back to before with just a snap and maybe a passing comment about his mischief.
It would drive him mad I think, he'd be rlly annoyed and pissy about it.
Or alternatively, a reader that does get angry when he tries to annoy them, (a loud and aggressive angry or a quiet festering angry both yielding different reactions from bill) and Bill takes it as motivation to keep annoying you (and it's definitely only because he thinks it's funny and totally definitely no other reason).
(Holy shit this is already getting long)
・Sub!Bill
So obviously a brat right? Like very obviously? We all agree on that.
And this next bit will probably just be regurgitating your points because I can't stop having the same opinions as you,
I personally need to see any + every version of bill cipher getting taken down a peg. Like I need to just. Ruin his life a little. Like I need to cause him mental peril and make it up to him (but actually it's only for me) by making him beg for what he wants and not giving him anything unless he asks out loud because "well I'm not a mind reader" (more powerful reader probably IS but shhhh..)
I want him to cry and beg (as do most people who read your blog honestly)
・masochist bill
Thinking about the way that bill literally talks about going out of his way to inflict pain onto the bodies he "possesses" (? Idk if that's the word I should use) made me think. Like too much thinking too many thoughts, to the point that I at multiple points almost wrote a small drabble in my notes app about it. (I would've if I could think of any words to write down when I need them 😭)
But like he's definitely some kind masochist right?
I can't think of any scenarios for human reader he made a deal with and bill for this category but imagine with me pls, a HUMAN reader, that he made a deal with (is actively trying to manipulate), causing him PAIN somehow (directly or indirectly), and he... DOSENT MIND? because 1. He's gonna have a mental breakdown because of it probably, and 2. He dosent JUST not mind. It's like EXCITING but not normal exciting.
So basically he'd be freaking out.
And with a reader that's more powerful than him? I think it'd be clear as day. Going hand in hand with the angry reader that's more powerful than him thing above, he would absolutely get off on annoying them until they snap at him (specifically the snap at him part). And when reader notices, they're obviously gonna make fun of him because hes being pathetic lol.
I think I have run out of masochist bill words now so onto the next topic.
・tease reader (human) x bill
My main reason for bringing this up is I love the idea of the powerful bill cipher being.. Well, flustered.
Like maybe when it's triangle form bill its easier to hide for him but if it were human bill reader would be able to tell almost instantly probably.
And more opportunities to make fun of bill for being a pathetic little creature are always good :)
・tease reader (more powerful) x bill
OOWOWHEOEJEIEBSJBSISNDH I love this idea so so SO SO SOSOSOSO MUCH!!!3&:28&:9.
SO MANY MORE OPPORTUNITIES TO TEASE AND NOT GET KILLED :)
Like imagine with me, your teasing bill and he gets all "upset" and probably threatens you, you don't gotta back off, you infact can tease him even more for thinking that he can threaten you. Shheheheheheheh.
I think that's all my words, I seem to have run out.
I hope that big lump of nothing text (800-ish words 😰) was enough to make up for my sudden dissapearence after promising to talk about bill TWO WEEKS AGO
Forgive my probably dogshit spelling and grammar pls
and hope you have a good day/night/whatever!
IUAHAHSHSHSHSHHSHDHSHAHS I LOVE THINGS LIKE THIS IN MY INBOX!!!!! Because it’s like wow, you did all the work for me! 😊
Ugh, this is so good tho. I always love to hear your thoughts, you are one of my FAV anons!!!!!
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signanothername · 11 hours
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Do you think that your take on nightmare could become a better person without becoming at least fully uncorrupted?
I like your take on uncorrupted nm but I was curious to ask because there’s not really much of Nightmare becoming a better person *whilst* still being corrupted?
Asking the real questions here >:)
Before I start this ramble however, I think it’s important to keep in mind that even while uncorrupted, Nightmare’s still a bitch, cause as I mentioned before, Nightmare wouldn’t suddenly get back to becoming a kind angel with a big heart, and it’s also important to keep in mind that if uncorrupted Nightmare got back to being powerful (even without the corruption in the mix) he’s extremely prone to (and would probably) get back to his old ways
Cause while the corruption has a great impact on Nightmare’s behavior and how he deals with his emotions, the corruption is less of the root cause and more of a participant in Nightmare’s awful behavior
The root cause of Nightmare’s awful behavior is extreme fear born out of trauma
The corruption already did its job a long time ago and shaped Nightmare as a person, it’s still Nightmare himself that’s in full control of his actions, he could at any point in time, make the right or wrong decision
With that in mind, could Nightmare be a better person whilst corrupted?
I’d say it’s kinda complicated, it’s both yes and no at the same time
Could he become a better person whilst corrupted?
Yes
Would he overall become a better person with better behavior? And with everyone?
No, unless there’s an actual driving force to motivate Nightmare to be a better person somewhat (which is absolutely possible ;) ), Nightmare would continue to be a bitch
Could he still get better at treating specific people that he deems worth his time? And only deems worth his time after specific interactions that made him believe so?
Yes
Corrupted or not, Nightmare isn’t incapable of becoming a better person, however there needs to be a reason for Nightmare to be so
Nightmare is a very “treat people how they treat you” kinda person, and while Nightmare is extremely toxic, abusive, and cruel, he’s also someone who stays true to his word and would treat who treats him with kindness the same, and Nightmare doesn’t easily believe in genuine kindness without a goal behind it, and so he’d insist on giving something back instead of accepting kindness for what it is
So if someone shows him genuine kindness, he’d also show genuine kindness (in his own twisted way) in “this is me paying my debt back” way, like, he’d “pay it back” by keeping the AU of the person who showed him kindness under his protection for a period of time, or let go of a debt they owe him, etc
I’ve mentioned before that Nightmare is capable of kindness, and I don’t mean in “paying someone’s kindness back” kinda way, but he can actually be kind in an active way where he thinks of doing something kind to someone else without it being a payback of sorts, and so Nightmare can still make a good decision and actually show it without any strings attached, and the truth is he does show it, very rarely, but he does (in the “a little life update” comic, Killer mentions how Nightmare managed to do one “good thing” at least ;) )
Nightmare just has a mindset that’s like “nobody was ever kind to me when i was the one who’s helpless/ defenseless, so why should I ever show anyone kindness now that I’m in power?” It’s an irrational mindset, but the thing is, no one can debate him on it considering it’s something he keeps to himself
For the outside world, Nightmare does what he does cause he’s a bitch and that’s it, not taking into consideration the fact he acts the way he does as a result of a harmful mindset he developed due to a life changing traumatic experience (obviously cause they don’t know)
And while his kindness is still pretty much apart of him, whenever he has certain thoughts of doing something good/ kind for someone, he just immediately stomps on it and tells himself that he’s being “irrational”, and yes, Nightmare thinks that being kind in a cruel world is “irrational”, he’s the opposite to Dream, who thinks that being kind in a cruel world is what true strength is
And y’know I kinda always talk about how much of a bitch Nightmare can be, but I never talk about the fact that, despite how bitchy he is, Nightmare can actually be sensible
In the right circumstances at the right times, Nightmare can actually be talked to without him being an absolute bitch
And that goes for almost everyone, MTT included
like Killer, Murder and Horror can actually talk to him without Nightmare immediately taking it as a chance to abuse them
But Nightmare is the kinda person that you need to tiptoe around sometimes, cause he has insane mood swings, so MTT have to check whether he’s in a good mood or a bad mood and based on that decide whether it’s a good idea to approach and talk to him or leave him alone and sometimes even go as far as make themselves as small and as unseen as possible as to not catch his attention
Building a good rapport with Nightmare is.. complicated, but possible
But the thing is, even if Nightmare became a better person, it’s better to keep your expectations a bit low, cause even if Nightmare took genuine steps towards becoming a better person i think his capacity for that is limited, like don’t expect him to become like Dream where he’d jump to saving someone in need, but he’d cut back on his abusive and toxic behavior
Basically, Nightmare would become a better person but in a passive rather than an active way where he’d stop hurting people himself, but would let other people do the hurting for him (and i mean in a natural way with how positivity and negativity works and not send someone to hurt another)
For example, let’s say the twins see an innocent someone get beaten in front of them, Dream would immediately jump in to save them, Nightmare wouldn’t, he’d watch with sadistic glee and it would even get a chuckle or two outta him as the poor soul is getting beaten all while he feeds on their misery and once he’d fed himself he’ll just leave (and that’s regardless whether he’s corrupted or not)
It’s cause Nightmare also has the mindset of “the strong devours the weak”, it’s the natural order of things to him, it’s not his fault that the world around him settles for the minimum is it? That’s why he’s obsessed with power and would do anything to obtain it, if Nightmare can ensure that he keeps that power by torturing innocent people then he’ll do it, all cause he’s paralyzed by the terror of the mere thought of becoming weak again
To Nightmare, weakness means a death sentence, and we all know how irrationally afraid Nightmare is of death
Despite his power, knowledge, and 500 year long experiences, Nightmare was and will always be a fearful child who claws at the world around him first so it wouldn’t have the courage to claw back at him (completely dismissing the fact that the world would claw back regardless >:) )
For Nightmare to become a better person he needs to face his greatest enemy, and that enemy was always his own self
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snakebites-and-ink · 8 hours
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Whumper-Turned-Caretaker CYOA 28 (End)
CW for the series | Masterlist
You chose to let Whumpee choose (you hope they stay).
You decide to leave it up to Whumpee. You’d like them to stay with you, but they deserve the freedom to choose for themself.
The next day, you broach the topic.
“Whumpee….I know you’re getting better, and…it wouldn’t be fair for me to hold you back from your life if you’re ready to go back to whatever it was you had before. Or to move on to something new. I can’t keep you against your will anymore. I’m letting you go. I’d love it if you stayed, but if you want to leave, you’re free to. The choice is yours.”
“Oh.” They blink, taken by surprise. “Thank you.” Then more ardently, “Thank you.”
They take some time to think about it. You’ll give them as much time as they need. You like having them around.
* * *
When you wake up the next morning, Whumpee is nowhere to be found.
You suppose you can’t blame them for leaving, given what you put them through, but you can’t say you’re happy about them going. Especially without saying anything. You start making breakfast, and frown as you have to consciously remind yourself to only cook for one.
You hear your door open. You turn to look at the doorway, confused, and see Whumpee standing there.
“Whumpee?” you say in surprise. “I thought you were gone.”
“I went for a walk.”
Of course. They were still making up for lost time with the sunshine. You give them a smile, doing your best to convey that that’s fine. They have their freedom now. “Oh. No problem. I’ll get some more food cooking.” Still, you make a mental note to get them a cellphone in case things go wrong when you’re not with them. And a house key if they’re going to go out while you’re still asleep.
“So, have you decided what you’re going to do?” you ask over breakfast. You don’t want to pressure them into making a decision if they’re not ready yet, but you would like to know if they are.
“Um, I…I think I’m going to stay,” they answer, a little timidly.
“I would love to have you stay,” you respond genuinely, “On your terms this time. But if you ever change your mind, you’ll still be free to leave.”
* * *
The first thing you do after learning they’re staying is move the lock you put on their door so it locks from the inside instead of the outside. You intend to respect their privacy either way, but you hope having the ability to lock you out will give them some added security and control. You do also get them a phone and house key. And you offer to pay for any therapy they want: for all the help you’re willing to give them, you know you’re not a professional.
Over time, they continue to get happier and more at ease. Once in a while, the old fear rears its head, but you work through it and it doesn’t dominate their life. Occasionally, you have a moment where you miss the way things were before. But there are so many more moments where you appreciate what you have now. You’re glad you changed yourself and your relationship with Whumpee for the better.
Thanks for playing!
Taglist:
@kabie-whump, @whumpanthems, @whumpsoda, @3-2-whump, @generic-whumperz, 
@taterswhump, @alivenova, @whumped-by-glitter, @expressionless-fr, @whumpycries, 
@whumpsday, @moons-cozy-corner, @echo-goes-aaa, @whumplr-reader, @starfields08000, 
@whump-blog, @ivymyers, @currentlyinthesprial, @lumpofsand, @coffin-hopping, 
@ragin-cajun-fangirl, @catnykit, @indigoviolet311, @dragongodryss, @kira-the-whump-enthusiast,
@risk606, @natthebatt, @decaffeinatedtimetraveler94, @whatwhump, @venusski
@hermitcrabs-1,  @croixph, @mj-or-say10, @kawaii-cakes, @gevwer,
@fourwingedwriter, @turtlesnap1, @whump-till-ya-jump
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jazeswhbhaven · 1 day
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With the whole Leviathan thing. I think is just his archetype is really popular with Japan.
Seeing another game that has a similar to what Leviathan is, and seeing the popularity of that characters type. It seems like, hard wall that has been build up and it takes time to get their walls to broke.
Plus, there's this unknown factor where you think that they are being an Asshole, but they actually have a reason behind their action.
One example I know is with the Character from Ikemen Prince, Chevalier is describe as (this is from the wiki)
True to his title, Chevalier is as ruthless and merciless as a cruel beast and is quick to cut down his enemies no matter who they are. He is indifferent to to almost everyone and doesn't spend much time interacting with people, and usually prefers to be alone. However, in his route after meeting the MC he somehow changes and began to get use to feeling certain emotions such as love, which he views as something unnecessary in the past.
Reading his route, you would imagine that people would not like him, however
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2nd voting
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Most of the voting, Chevalier always take 1st place.
Often times it just culture differences and people/majority have a preferences. We really can't do anything about it.
For me, often I like least popular characters or the most popular character cause I'm drawn to what I like, and with Chevalier and Leviathan they scratched a certain type I love.
And with MC, its a porn game. MC will be written as a blank slate with the motivation of being horny cause no reasonable person would act like this if you were surrounded with horny and feral devils that speak their mind with no filter or no restrained of their urges.
Like, if we put real life logic with some of the behavior, some of them will be questionable. But this is fictional game with their own logic. The game will do some kinky stuff that people like in their fiction.
Anyway, I wanted to share my 2 cent on Leviathan. I've have my problem with his character. And that fine, if he was just all nice with MC after the contract, that would have been too ooc for him.
Honestly, I like how his dynamic with MC in the main story now (ie. Chapter 6)
I'm glad you put this into words/visuals, because a lot of things I tend to say are usually said better by others. I recognize the character you mentioned because I did play a little bit of Ikemen Prince myself! When it comes to types, I can for sure agree that for myself, anyone with his or Levi's type is not my first pick. I also agree this could very well be cultural differences that come into play as well.
Though I do understand the why for Levi. Childhood robbed from him, experiments, other screwy things. I'd have walls too. In the comics though I see the other side of him that isn't so combative and that's why it's that love/hate thing I've got going on for him as a whole.
I'm unsure if anything I said may indicate that I'm taking his personality to heart, I'd like to clarify that I do not take it deeply that he's this way, it's more of empty rants lol he's nothing more than pixels with a smart mouth.
The way they have MC/Levi's dynamic for Chapter 6 has me satisfied too, I will not be bothered if they keep that up for the future chapters we get.
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Text
Ass Play - Logan Howlett x ftm!Reader
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A/N: MORE HYBRID!READER!!! Also, sorry for the ending, I was in a rush to get this out on time. This is meant as a companion piece to Asshole, but can be read on its own
Let me know if I missed any warnings
CW: smut; explicit sexual content; Reader is a canine mutant; Reader is in heat; Reader is called pup and mutt; Reader’s parts are referred to as dick and hole; rimming; ass licking; ass play; ass fingering (idk what this is called lol); multiple orgasms; lube is used!; penetrative sex; fingering; fr what is it called when someone pushes their cum back into you?; fluffy ending; cuddling; literal petting; no aftercare; falling asleep
915 words
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You’re shaking with excitement. Well, really, your tail is wagging so hard the rest of you is shaking.
You’re all ready on the bed for him. Face down, hole dripping, ass in the air. Any other hybrid mutant would be able to tell in an instant that you’re waiting to be fucked.
It doesn’t help that you’re on the last day of your heat. You can feel it still smoldering inside you. A low burning fire of need.
You’re sure Logan can smell it in you. Can tell that you’re dying for his dick. Yet, he just grips your hips, positioning you just right. It’s absolutely maddening.
“Come on, Logan,” you whine. “Stop messing around. I need you.”
“Be quiet, pup.” His voice is gruff but not mean. “You’ll take what I give you.”
You whimper and bury your face in his pillows. Tail still wagging. You can’t help it. You’ve been planning this for almost two days. Buying the necessary things and watching videos on what to do.
Finally, Logan seems to move. He spreads your ass cheeks, running his thumb over your puckered hole. You whine and shiver, the touch alone sparking heat in your gut.
The first lap of his tongue against your ass has you moaning. You bite down hard against the pillow to keep from whimpering as he drags his tongue over your asshole. Probing at it with the tip and circling the rim.
It feels delightful. The warmth and wetness just adding to the feeling. You squirm a bit, trying to press back into his touch.
Logan growls softly and grips your tail, using it to keep you still. “Calm down, pup. Haven’t even gotten to working you open and you’re eager as a puppy.”
You whine and let go of the pillow, lifting your head to look back at him. “But Logan… it feels so good!”
He pushes your head back down into the pillows. “You’re not listening to me, pup, and bad dogs don’t get their rewards.”
That shuts you up. You sigh and settle yourself back down.
After a few moments, Logan goes back to licking at your asshole. You bite the pillow again to stifle your moans, gripping the sheets tightly under you.
He continues to eat your ass, slowly working his tongue inside. He grips your thighs, grumbling out a quiet, “Loosen up, pup. You’re too tight.”
You relax as best you can, helping him in further. It’s difficult when your toes are curling with pleasure and your head is getting fuzzy. Maybe it’s your heat, but you swear you’ve never felt this good before.
It’s not long before you cum, soaking your thighs with slick. Logan rumbles appreciatively and pulls back. “You ready for my dick, pup?”
Your tail springs to life, wagging so eagerly you almost hit him in the face with it. “Yes, yes, yes!”
Logan chuckles and goes to grab something from the nightstand. You keep your face pressed to the pillows, the anticipation building inside you.
He returns with a bottle. A few moments go by before something cold drips against your asshole. Logan smears it around, using his fingers to spread what you assume is lube around your asshole. He dips a finger in, slowly working you open.
You make a ridiculous sound, pressing back eagerly. You can’t help yourself. It feels good.
Logan fingers your ass for a little while, making you cum for a second and then third time.
By your fourth orgasm, he finally takes out his cock. He slides it between your thighs, coating it in your slick. Then he rubs the tip against your asshole, waiting until you’re whimpering in anticipation before pushing it in.
It’s a tight fit, your ass squeezing him even tighter than your hole. You moan into the pillows, feeling full in a whole new way.
Your dick throbs with need and your fingers snake down to rub at it. Logan smacks your hand away, moving to replace it with his own. He rubs you torturously slow, timing it perfectly with his thrusts.
He’s panting, groaning, muttering filthy things about how perfectly tight you are and about all the things he wants to do to you. You just take what he gives you, your mind a fuzzy haze.
The way his dick rubs against the walls of your ass is intoxicating. And when his fingers dip inside your hole, you feel so full. The squelch from your ass and hole is filthy. The sound louder than it’s ever been.
You cum, and you cum hard. Your vision blurs, your head spinning with pleasure. You can barely think, so lost you just moan helplessly.
With a grunt and growl from Logan, warmth fills your ass. Spilling out as he slowly pulls out. You groan when he stuffs it back in, hole clenching as he grumbles out, “Gotta keep you nice and full.”
You just go boneless on the bed, letting him climb in and pull you to him. You nuzzle into his side, tail giving a few shaky wags. “That… was amazing…”
Logan chuckles, sounding as breathless as you. “Yeah, pup. I knew you’d like it. Dirty mutt like you.”
You bury your face in his chest with a groan. “No more… My body aches…”
Logan laughs, but strokes your head, petting your fluffy ears fondly. “Alright. No more.”
You both relax, just basking in each other’s comfort. It feels nice, and it’s not long before you're falling into sleep.
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marengogo · 2 days
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Are You Sure ?! - #4: I Hate that YOU Love Hate You but, I Love YOU, so ...
I’m listening to a Mellow/Angsty Love playlist - (yes) it has BTS/ solos BTS songs as well
[Music is a very big part of my life and I’m MOSTLY INCAPABLE of writing without music, so I just thought I'd share what I am listening to while writing this]
–🐺–🐺–🐺–
Hello My Sentimental Girls, Bois and Enbys,
Please be kindly warned that I am going to be overpoweringly sensitive as I write this. Not necessarily because Are You Sure?! has unfortunately come to an end, but because, as I try to write this post, as always, “through” my TwinFlame’s JK emotional lens, the last two episodes really were so full of so many feelings that I am trying my best to order my thoughts and do them justice. Like, let me tell you, this boy really felt plenty, or better yet he allowed himself to truly feel a lot hence, as always, through respectful speculation and educated guessing I’ll try my best to convey my related observations. 
Towards the end of the post I’ll also have a little confession to make about something that I have been so determinedly ignoring, because the mere thought always makes me so uncomfortable, sad, and a tiny bit scared, so there’s also that.
All that being said, here I am, concluding this physical/sentimental journey, with my unrequested thoughts but with a hopeful sense that perhaps writing this down will somehow lessen my emotional weight, because let’s be for real, I am going to have AYS withdrawals on Thursday. So, is this post going to be long?  … 🤡 I mean, you should know me by now. For those who don’t know me, yes, it will be a long post 🙏🏾.
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Truly free things are hard to come by nowadays. Undoubtedly, money has effectively found its way into our everything. Yet, there is one thing that hasn’t changed in its acquired value as in, how you get by it, and how you get it, etc. This one thing is still available free and you can find it anywhere, LITERALLY. However, whether or not you’ll be able to acquire it, and eventually keep it, is, to this day, one of the most debated, discussed, joyed over, cried over, mused over, etc, topic. 
Yes, you’ve guessed; it’s Love. 
I don’t believe I was actually ever taught about just Love in all its forms. Not at home, not at school school talked about famous people in love, sexual education, popular love … basically they beat around the bushes 🙄, or amongst friends, and if I had, I do not recall it, at all and y’all, I have one heck of a good memory, I will not be humble about that. I think that my first notions and ideas I formed about the concept of Love came through books and films, and let me tell you, there is an infinite related archive out there, which can be as exciting, as much as dangerous. Regardless, even though it was never really explained to me same for everyone most likely, as I grew up, EVERYONE loooved to talk about it, ALL THE TIME, so somehow, I made my own understanding of it. 
One of the things I understood was that some day, when I would become a woman, I would find an adult man, have a family, children, and live happily ever after because I would fall in love and some man would fall in love with me. I understood it as a given; Everyone, of a certain gender, falls in love with someone, of the opposite gender, because there is someone out there, of a certain gender, for everyone, of the opposite gender, just waiting to find you or to be found. Basically, Everyone will eventually find, and forever keep, mutual heterosexual romantic Love.
Spoiler alert: It wasn’t not true.
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In fact, the true state of things is actually the very opposite. The minority of people on this planet, heterosexual or not, will experience, and live with true mutual romantic love, and will be able to keep it for a very long time, and even fewer others will be able to take it all the way to the day they die, those are at the Legendary Level ones. And I am not saying this because I am jaded or bitter or any other hurt and/or hater-inclined-behaviour, you can really miss me with alla dat. This is just that one very helpful, and hard, to accept and you don’t have to accept it by the way! reality that should hit everyone at some point, but not always does. When it doesn’t hit, people may end up tormenting themselves sometimes to death when and/or if they can’t “find love”, wondering if they are unloveable, what is wrong with them, etc etc etc.  
Reason why, it is paramount to love yourself first and foremost. 
Because it might be true that someone is “unlovable” or that there is “something wrong with them” but, if true, this is principally hindering one’s well-being because, finding and trying to fix whatever might be amiss with one's self, may not guarantee a successful mutual romantic love, but it does guarantee a happier life in general. I mean, listen, if in the scope of things, you might end up having to spend the rest of your life without a mutual romance, meaning, you have to spend infinite time with you, yourself & YOU, how is that going to work, if you don’t love yourself …? And, just in case it wasn’t common knowledge, Loving Yourself is not easy, like any other relationship, it takes work. The reason why therapy ain’t cheap ✌🏾💰💋but needed, honestly.
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So, let’s make no mistake; alas Love, in any of its forms btw, if it is harmful, it is not Love is needed. In fact, as it turns out, human beings were “programmed” in such a way that having it in one's life would make their existence progress less painfully, or even painlessly. In addition, self-love is one of the purest, satisfying, and incredibly useful types of love out there.
ALL OF THAT BEING SAID, for those lucky enough to find & keep romantic love regrettably, thus far, I am not one of those, trust me when I tell you, it is not at all smooth sailing. There are just so many factors to be factored in and the bear thought of it all can honestly be enough to make anyone not want to be bothered by it.
Yet, my beloved and most precious, TwinFlame seems to have found it. Now, I can’t guarantee it to be romantic as always, despite me believing it to be so but he sure as hell is fighting his darn life to keep it. So, yes, hm, I think
JK is in Love.
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If it wasn’t clear enough in episode 1 all the way to this finale, JM is a person whose presence JK particularly wants in his life, and whose absence kinda makes him feel sort of … unsettled? … but I’ll dive deep into this, later on in this post. For now, it is important to point out that my TwinFlame not only actively looks after JM, but he actively seeks JM’s attention, he actively wants to be sought by JM, he actively tries to make JM happy, he actively wants to level with JM, he actively wants JM to be comfortable around himself JK and for JM to be comfortable with himself JM. Basically, JK cares, in his own way, quite loudly for JM. And I say “his own way” because I believe JK’s emotional intelligence (EI) to be somewhat different from the common ones. I actually received an ask about his EI, which I plan to answer very soon 🙏🏾, so for now, I will not dive into that in this, cos I really ain’t trying to compete with the length of dictionaries with this post 😬. 
Japanese people, traditionally, have a fascination for sad love stories, and ever since I got into 875, I’ve been wondering if Koreans feel the same way but in their case, it is likely to be just Sadness period. You see, in the West, we “all” love a heartbreaking and passionate love story, the reason why Romeo and Juliet will probably be eternally famous. Yet, we don’t believe that true love is love, because it is brought about by unbearable suffering, so it must be real. We are more of the true love, is love, because it leads to immeasurable happiness kinda style. Basically we Westerners love Romeo and Juliet because of what they could have been, but Japanese and maybe Koreans would love Romeo of Juliet because of what they were to each other. So when a person like me watches a movie like 5 Centimetres per Second and swears to never watch it EVER AGAIN which I haven’t and refuse to, a Japanese person might think that is probably one of those movies they’ll find themselves watching over and over again and let me tell you, it was great, I just don’t think I can handle a second viewing, no thanks.
So if I am correct in thinking that Koreans feel similarly as Japanese in this matter, JK, like many other Korean folk, loves to sing sad/angsty/melancholic songs. Either by himself, or in company, like he used to with Tae probably they still do as well as watching sad movies, like JM’s favourite being The Notebook and JK’s being Titanic. Yet, here is where the glitch in the matrix happens; JK was most likely not that serious but wasn’t he? 😬 when he brought this up however, he seemed to be a little bothered by the fact that JM really liked “Hate You” out of all the song in his album. JM sang Seven, 3D and Standing Next to You this particular one he kept bringing up like there was no tomorrow, throughout all 3 trips, yet, when he played Hate You in the car, for the second time because he had as well in episode 6 JK was like; “Why?”. 
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Let me tell you something.You know how I usually skip Spring Day, cause I can’t really handle it? Before AYS Ep. 8 I used to skip Hate You as well for the same reasons as Spring Day; it was too sad for me to bear as it felt closely related him singing it alone makes me relate it to him in my flowed brain, even though he didn’t write it 🙃 to people I love, people being the Tannies. Lovely by Khalid and Billie Eilish in comparison is MUCH SADDER but because I am in no way emotionally connected to either Khalid or Billie I don’t mind listening to the song at all I love that song. 
Anyways, Long story short, it looked like it bothered him a tiny bit. It felt almost as if “Sure, we are Koreans and we like sad love songs, this being an excellent one, but I don’t want MY love story to be sad” kind of bothered “also this better have NOTHING to do with the fact that Shawn Mendes wrote this song!” - perhaps nervously thought JK 🤡🤣😂. In fact, there are a few situations that came up, involving him and JM, which “bothered” him and he had no qualms in bringing up with JM right away, which by the way is healthy AF. JK seems to be the type of partner that wants to confront you right away and will not let it be until he hears the words that make him know that the “conflict” is cleared to his own satisfaction, or until he senses you don’t want to talk about it any further in that particular moment.
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Those are all examples, during AYS, where JK was satisfied with the answer that JM gave him to the legit concerns/silly questions he brought up. JK’s reaction right after all of those answers was him being content/happy, by laughing, singing along, or something else, hence moving on. Below is an example where he wasn’t satisfied with the answer:
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Did he just drop it? Did they talk it out? As always, we will never know, as this part cuts into another scene. Only JK, JM and the editors will know and this is a fact we should never forget. Never forget about editing limitations, and this is a very good moment to add that even though whoever translated this show did a shitty ass job, the crew that went with them, to film in Sapporo specifically, seemed to be quite familiar with them, their dynamics almost like friends, which I think contributed with JK and JM feeling as comfy as they did in Japan.
Japan.
By the looks of it, this is the country that holds special meaning to both myself and my TwinFlame and, NGL, this kinda makes me happy and feel special LOL 😜. BUT, I DIGRESS! Didn’t JK seem a bit more … relaxed? Besides the very romantic fact that he wanted to go back to Tokyo because it was their first trip, didn’t JK seem a tad flirtier, a tad cuter, a tad more annoying, a tad comfier and just so fucking happy? He, and I’d dare say JM as well, truly let their guards down, even if just a tad. The fact that JK & JM wondered how the crew would have edited the content tells me that they were fully aware about the fact that they were being filmed, but didn’t want to think too much about it, because they wanted to also have a sense of freedom. Because of that, perhaps, they tried to give us as much realness as they could, restraining themselves in some instances, while also saying Fuck it! in few other cases during which they perhaps forgot about the fact that they were being filmed, confidently relying on their trusted crew to properly edit the footage in the best way possible. But back to the main point,
JK is in Love.
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JK is probably the type of person who wishes he could have an answer, and/or remedy, to any problem his significant other may have. Yeah, he is probably the type of man that wishes he could take away all their pain, or feel it for them instead, and it is exactly because he seems to be willing to do anything for his loved one’s well-being that I think that sometimes he does struggle with some of their societal boundaries, such as; age hierarchy. Without getting too much into his EI, the part in episode 7 where he brings up how things would have been if he and JM would have been born the same year really stood out and stayed with me.
In this particular instance, for the first time I finally got to see him kinda mind about their age difference, almost troubled and not because he might think it to be a lot which it isn't at all, but because according to their societal practices, he theoretically should constantly be mindful about it, limiting greatly the actions he can do, not that he’s ever heed to them, but the fact is that he should, and in certain situations, he must. If we think about it properly, right from their debut years, JK has struggled a lot with referring, and treating, JM as a hyung, which is actually quite weird considering that the person he treated more like a “chingu” friend of the same age in this context was is Tae, even though, to my knowledge, he’s never dropped honorifics with him and had no desire in doing so, as explained during the first In The Soop which in hindsight, I’m sure must have confused Tae a lot who has been trying to be his cool hyung for as long as I can remember  (the following pictures are not from In The Soop, but Festa 2021). 
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Like, it is honestly so peculiar how, back in the day, JK had never really treated JM as your typical “chingu”, nor a hyung, yet found himself sticking by JM’s side a lot, off cameras, filming him a lot, acting stand-offish just to apologise right after, staring at him a lot, learning all his likes and dislikes, studying his body and habits, doing questionable things such as focusing rather often on his lips and butt through a camera lens, which eventually evolved into JM being the first member he’s ever bought a gift for, as well as being the first member he’s ever travelled alone with… basically, as I’ve stated, JK has really never seen JM as his hyung or friend though he does try to remind himself of it. 
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So if JM is not a hyung, or a “chingu”; then what is he? 🙄… 
Wanna know what’s even funnier? JM clearly cares about JK enormously and though he likes most of all of his sides cos JK can be annoying when he wants to 🤡✌🏾 the side he likes the most is his cute side; but here comes the catch. It would seem that from their debut days, JM truly became fond of that cutesy, happily skipping, side that JK shows with his hyungs in particular and the fact that they are ALL his hyung, including JM, just made writing this sentence so weird NGL …, that cuddly, super-maknae aura he has many a time, with literally everyone but the 95s, because Tae, as speculated, he seems to see as a chingu and JM as a … charming person?? Whatever that means.
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Now JK does give JM “cute”, sometimes, but it is not the little brother kind of cute. It’s that “don’t go without me…” kind of cute, “let’s buy the same one” kinda cute, “you didn’t show me first, so I am hurt” kinda cute, “how do I look?” kind of cute “I can film you, but don’t film me” kind cute, “... spend time with ME!” kinda cute … you get the jist, don’t you? Cause, repeat after me; He a simp, he a simp, he a simp! And there is nothing wrong with being a simp tbh, as long as you own up to it, and JK does own up to it marvellously 💋.
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And remember when I mentioned about him feeling sort of unsettled when JM isn’t around? I’ve been thinking about this for a couple of days but doesn’t it almost feel like a sort of … separation anxiety? Through the whole episodes it sometimes felt like he tried to do as much as possible, of anything, with JM as if he would just take off and leave at some point. This could also explain him always popping up on WEVERSE whenever JM took a flight, or trying his darn best to get him to come around even though they had just spent so much time together in the US. But who knows right? Perhaps he just really loves to spend every hour, every minute, every second with JM because, like crazy,  
JK is in Love.
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So in love that he thought it important for himself to drive them to the airport, hence he didn’t drink that last beer I know he was dying inside, as well as taking a flight to Korea with JM, when he really could have just flown to the US from Japan. So in love that out of all the trips he's been to in his life, Are You Sure?! is the best trip he’s ever been on and he wishes to reboot when they come out of the military, where, by the way, they presently are together 🤡 . So in love that he wasn’t going to have JM get sad and lost in his own thoughts while in his presence, no, reason why, like a knight in shining armour, he “went and saved” him from his slump and not because JM was a princess in distress, but because prince charming also needs saving every once in a while If you ask me, the main “princess” in this relationship is my TwinFlame, no doubt, cause I also fo happen to think that they do take turns, for sure. Hence, the main “prince charming” is most definitely JM, and btw, frequency of a certain behaviour is not a factor that determines who is “main” 💋. 
Marengo Confession-Time!  😬- here it goes: I love watching people react to ANY 875 content, but I haven’t been able to watch anybody react to Are You Sure?! Because to put it plainly I am scared. I’m scared that people will question their relationship, or have homophobic reactions, or feel uncomfortable watching them when they do what they do. I just don’t want them to be hated for something they can’t help and are comfortable with. For the most part I am sure they would maybe nt comment, or chalk it up as “brotherly behavior", but what if they don’t? In fact, I am also so apprehensive of the reaction the world would have if they are a couple if they ever came out, it genuinely terrifies me.
I don’t want them to be looked at like freaks, or worse, so I am not able to bring myself to watch people react to them, in the same way I turn off when people have unwarranted shit to say when reacting to 875’s music. If they are a couple, I truly want them to be happy, safe, and become part of the Legendary Level ones. So, even though the world may not be fully ready to want their chapter in their history books, I hope it will someday,  because theirs would be such a motivating and enthralling chapter at that. 
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I don’t know what will await them when they come out of ME. It is interesting though that JK made all these memories during the trip to take with himself and think about while serving. The snow he watched with JM, the restaurants they ate at, the time they tried skiing for the first time, the antics in the sauna and the “scuzzi”, the tuna-mayo gimbap he knew JM would love, the good afternoon and good night whiskey, and more. Now that I think about it, in some way, JK has a similar Love background to mine, he most likely wasn’t taught that romantic Love can come from someone of the same gender and he wasn’t exactly taught that not having children or a traditional family can be okay. 
Yet, I have a feeling that just like me, through movies perhaps, songs, or other means he’s figured out a thing or two. I have a feeling that he will decide for himself what Love is to himself, all the forms of Love he will need, who embodies Love for him, and what role Love will take in his life, and whether or not JM turns out to be that person MAKE NO MISTAKE: JM is an incredibly important person in his life. So, it is a strong feeling I have, but then again when has JK ever not taken control of his own life? When has he ever not followed his instincts and/or succumbed to what people want him to do? Same for JM really. 
These are two boys who found themselves in Seoul even though they were born in Busan, like, the universe wanted them to meet. They are two boys, who, along with the other five, made the phrase impossible Is Nothing feel real. After all, these are indeed two boys who really can’t be told to do anything. There is a very famous quote, which kinda makes me think of them:
I am the Master of my Fate, I am the Captain of my Soul.
So yeah, the future is uncertain but one thing is for sure, no relationship that took so long, so much care, and so many trails to build, can be so easily destroyed. So, fighting TwinFlame, whatever it is you want, you got this! 👊🏾.
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Always respectfully yours 🫰🏾💜,
Marengo.
PS - Dammit! I miss them so much 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
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the-busy-ghost · 3 days
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Men Called Him Sir Gray Steele
Having many Strange and Norrell thoughts at the moment, but since I'm not exactly the type of fan who goes through and annotates and analyses I'm probably missing things or overthinking other details that have already been noticed.
That being said I've arrived at Chapter 51, "A Family by the Name of Greysteel" and this reminds me of my old theory about Flora Greysteel's name. Potentially the most famous Flora in British history was Flora MacDonald, who in 1746 assisted Charles Edward Stuart in escaping to Skye in the aftermath of the failed Jacobite Rising. I may be overthinking this aspect, since as a Scot I'm naturally conditioned to associate the name Flora with both that story, and stories about women who help historical and mythical "heroes" generally (note- no opinions are to be given on the character of Jacobite claimants in this post, but I have many).
What I am now less convinced that I'm overthinking is the 'Greysteel' aspect. Now Greysteil was a ballad which was extremely popular in sixteenth century Scotland (though like many popular ballads and poems from this period it may have its roots on the other side of the border in northern England as well). The references to Greysteil in Scottish history are probably related to the poem Sir Eger and Sir Grime, which may be fifteenth century in origin, but chiefly survives from 17th century versions, including in Bishop Percy's collection. The plot synopsis on wikipedia makes it clear that this is a poem replete with strange knights, and, perhaps more importantly, helpful female characters who go around giving gifts of magical swords to the heroes or generally acting as 'cunning' leeches (a leech was the term often given to a medical person, but it's more ambiguous than the rather more specific terms 'surgeon' or 'physician'). The name Greysteil refers to the antagonist of Eger and Grime in the poem- he is a mysterious knight who lives in the 'forbidden' country.
In preparation for reading chapter 51, therefore, (and while my food is cooking), I'm skim-reading a copy of the version of this poem in the Percy folio and trying to keep any important details in mind so I can compare it with Strange and Norrell. (Copy printed here)
What I do notice immediately is that when Greysteil (clad in red and gold) defeats knights who have the misfortune of coming across him, as a prize he takes the little finger of the man's right hand. This is his calling card.
It's a bit early in my read to say for certain but this absolutely calls to mind the fact that the gentleman with the thistle-down hair takes the little finger of Lady Pole's left hand as a token of the agreement when he agrees to help Norrell bring her back to life. Now taking a little finger may be a common motif in other literature too, I'm not sure, but given that there are other reasons to connect Strange and Norrell to the old poem Greysteel I have to wonder if this is significant.
In heraldry, the man's coat of arms often went on the right or dexter (viewer's left) and the woman's on the left or sinister. From what I've come across over the last decade this tends to be seen in other depictions of male-female relations in mediaeval and early modern culture, with maleness associated with the right and female associated with the left (bearing in mind that these were often married couples where the straightforward gender binary was at its most evident). So I have to wonder if Greysteil taking the little finger from the right hand of his (presumably all) male enemies, and the fairy in Strange and Norrell taking the little finger of the left hand of the woman he enchants, can be compared.
Again I have no idea yet what this may mean for the significance of Flora Greysteel, and whether we are to assume that her family has some connection to either the figure in the ballad or the gentleman with the thistle-down hair- I have yet to actually re-read chapter 51 and find out. But I'm posting this here in case it's useful to more observant fans than me and in case anyone can offer any insight. It was always a question I'd have loved to ask the author if there was ever a Q&A but I may be twenty years too late on this one.
Anyway, on with my re-read of Sir Eger and Sir Grime (and dinner)!
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[miguel o'hara] holding the world
This is reposted from my AO3!
After a nightmare all about your deepest insecurities, Miguel is quick to comfort you.
In other words: I was having fun reading a filthy as fudge Miguel O’Hara fic, and all of a sudden, literary SUBDROP hit me in the face like Peter Porker had just pulled an anvil out of nowhere. SO--this short little blurb is for all my fellow Miguel O’Hara simps who need something soft to follow up that kinky shit. Not quite aftercare, but a whole--“you exist as a human being outside of sex” sort of thing. Especially when that sort of “post-nut/fic” clarity hits and you need some love. So yeah!-- love y’all.
tags: hurt/comfort, praise kink (that isn't really a praise kink but just comforting), fluff, angst, can be taken in a post-sex manner
His palm presses down harshly between your shoulder blades, forcing your face into the mattress while his free hand bruises your hip.
“This is all you’re good for–” he whispers– “and to think you’re not even that pretty.”
To say that you were innocent would be a lie, but to say that you could take little blows like that on a high without realizing how much the doubt built up would be doubly so. And while your Miguel never degraded you like that–would never even dare to go near such a thing–the insecurities had built up. The dam overflowed.
It’s what made you wake up in the middle of the night, gasping for air, imaginary hands on your neck lingering in the cool dark shadows.
“Mm… mi cariño? Por favor–what’s wrong?”
Miguel’s voice comes out as a mumble, muddled with sleep. And yet, his arm, formerly rested across your waist with lazy affection, is still strong as it pulls you into his chest. His face now nuzzled into the crook of your neck.
“Bad dream,” you answer in return. “It’s nothing… Go back to sleep.”
But he feels the way your body is stiff against his, and the way your chest rises and falls in the wake of frantic pain. He doesn’t believe you.
“I won’t until I know you’re okay. So don’t tell me it’s nothing.”
His voice is clearer now that his concern has further awakened him. But you don’t respond right away – unsure of how to do so. It was a nightmare, you tell yourself. A fear from past trauma and situationships and exes that shouldn’t – and wouldn’t – apply now. You tell yourself he loves you. Miguel loves you. You know you do. 
And yet, your brain doesn’t trust him. Refuses to. He’s too good to be true.
You overthink so much that your words don’t come out natural.
“I– I just… You– you love me, right?”
As you glance up at him, hands on his chest, you see Miguel’s soft expression harden. It almost makes you flinch: you’ve seen so many faces before that it’s hard to distinguish different types of stress. Or more like your own stress keeps you from determining his exact mood. So much so that, for a moment, you think he’ll answer no–
–but better than a yes–
–he sighs and presses his forehead against yours. Lets you feel small and safe and vulnerable all at once. In a way that you let him. And he traces the tips of his fingers down the side of your face–not quite cupping it, but brushing strands of your hair away.
“When I call you mi vida, mi amor, mi corazón – I don’t mean that you’re the love of my life. I mean that you are my heart in its entirety.” He gathers up your hands in his and presses a kiss to your knuckles. “That I am yours as much as you are mine.”
It’s his kindness that makes you break.
“I-I’m sorry. I don’t know why I’m like this. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I just– I trust you– I swear I do. But a part of me just nags that you don’t really want me. That all I do is annoy you. That I’m not enough and never will be–”
Miguel doesn’t say anything to halt your rants. He knows you need this moment to vent, and as such, does nothing but shush you gently as he sits upright and holds you in his lap. Once your cries quiet down, he wipes away your tears with his thumb, places a kiss to your forehead. All that, and more.
And seeing you pout, he gives you this half-soft, half-teasing smile.
“... Do you need me to praise you? I’ve got a lot of those up my sleeve, you know.”
You can feel how puffy your eyes are right now. Hell, you can feel all the side-effects of ugly crying–snotty nose, congested throat, raw skin. But Miguel doesn’t seem to care as you come to nod, only complying with what you need, and speaking gently as though singing a lullaby.
“Alright, then. You’re a good girl, you know. No–the best girl. I know you try your best in everything, but when it gets hard and you just want to exist for a bit, that’s okay, too. And have I mentioned how pretty you are? Ay por Dios, the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen. The smartest, too. She’s got me like a fool on a leash. Imagine that…”
You can feel sleep take you once again as he speaks. And you can feel the way he moves your shared blanket over your shoulders as your eyelids droop.
What you don’t hear is how he ends his little speech, long after consciousness has departed.
“And you’ll never believe how much I love her. Like I’m holding the world in my arms.”
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jorvikgender · 8 months
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best update off all time possibly ever....
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soyeonna · 6 months
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me because school bus graveyard ships
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i love aidlyn but i also love tyden and you cant go wrong with benlor but taylyn is so cute too and popstar has my whole heart but at the same time i love tylans dynamic and ashler is so fun to read and ashlerden is SO cute to read about and i cant do this anymore i need fast pass i will explode i cant wait till wednesday i will literally die!!!!,,!
i havent posted here so long damn sorry guys i was busy crying on ao3
PLEASE I NEED MORE FICS I HAVE READ ALL OF THEM!! PLEASE!! I WILL PAY!! I AM BROKE!! BUT I WILL PAY!! I AM GOING INSANE!! SOMEONE PLEASE MAKE A SBG FIC!! A LITTLE ONESHOT IS ALL I NEED!!
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