#its the rule of the jungle baby

[paint-it-dead]

this is completly self indulgent and fucking random but i HAVE to vent

this was one of my favourite few months fandon wise istg

first i experienced dazai osamu- THE Mr. Bungou Stray Dogs himself die on the anniversary of Bakugou Katsuki's death. Both of these occurencies very fucking hilarious to me for different reasons but needless to say i celebrated both(dazai's more, REST IN PISS BOZO) nevertheless

then i read a post here on the site of the tumblr that apparently griffith berserk has managed to live this long(over 30 human yrs) cus he "allegedly" survives by stealing the life force of other white haired anime boys. i found this hilarious and jokingly prayed to him that if that WAS the case then 'Please o please o please o great griffith i'll take any penalty just fucking kill Gojo Satoru i cant stand his fake ass' and GUESS WHAT

GOJO SATORU DIES WITHIN THE FUCKING WEEK OF ME SAYING THAT

but on that same day fucking DAZAI comes back from the dead.

so griffith did what he had to do to rid us of the annoying white haired twink but said brunettes r not his type.

what a wild ride.

i wish my life made as much sense as this lmao

[starry-bi-sky]

Clone^2 Damian

If you really think about, Damian's situation in the clone^2 au is... kinda tragic? Especially in the early months of his arrival. Like,,, think about it. Damian has always known he was a clone of Damian Wayne, that he was a copy of the blood son. There was nothing 'original' about him, not even his name (of which at least Danny has that). He was just... a replacement. A disposable one, to boot.

And he knew that, to an extent, by the time he was six years old. he might not have been actively acknowledging it -- he's six years old -- but deep down he knew. And like, he's six years old. Every small child craves the love and affection of an adult, especially their parents, and even though he knew he was clone, I imagine he still considered - and still does consider, somewhat - Talia and Bruce as his mother and father. And I really doubt he was... getting it?

Now, I know Talia loves Damian, her son. At least in some interpretations she does, and in this au she does. But... a clone of her son? I'm not so certain if she would have the same affection for baby Dames as she would for Damian. I don't think she would treat him badly, but I don't think Talia would treat him warmly either. Kinda just, distant. Colder than she would have been with OG Damian.

And, I know I've mentioned Damian's arrival from Danny's point of view, and its kind of comical kind of insane from his perspective -- a little boy clone of Damian Wayne falls through a portal and immediately attacks him. That sounds like a bad joke.

But, if you think of this from Damian's point of view? It's like he just got dropped into a scary movie. Like, think about it. You're six years old, and suddenly a portal, as green and as swirling as your grandfather's pools, opens up beneath your feet and sucks you through.

After an intense bout of vertigo, you end up in a massive, urban city -- completely different from the rural mountain palace that you lived in for the last six years of your life, and in this city, you don't know any of the language. You don't know what anyone is saying, you can't read any of the signs - you are completely stranded, away from home.

And then, to make things worse, you're facing a figure with a terrifying mask and eyes as burning green as the portal you fell through. Of course Damian's first instinct, six years old, is to attack. He's terrified.

And this figure, he's not a good fighter, but he's fast, and he dodges you quickly. He grabs your sword with his hands, and tries to restrain you, saying something in a language you don't know. Naturally, Damian is just scared. He's six! He'd just be learning how to read if he was normal child going to school.

This figure halfway through the fight yanks off his mask -- he realizes you're scared -- and looking at you now, is a youthful version of your father. This is a clone of your dad, someone you have never met but, six years old, still wants to. Damian gets defensive. This is an imposter.

But this imposter eventually gets you home with him - and he's using his little box, his phone, to communicate with you through a mechanical voice speaking in arabic. and it's frustrating. The boy, the imposter, can say whatever to you just fine, but trying to talk back is a hassle and a half. He's six, he doesn't have that much patience.

He wants to go home.

And so he keeps trying to run away. He keeps trying to find out of this hellish concrete jungle, and he keeps getting lost. It's loud, and busy, and there are people talking to you and you don't understand them, and there are rules and signs you don't understand - Damian tries to cross the street and nearly gets hit by a car. He doesn't know how the road signs work, he was never taught. They didn't get to that.

And he gets lost. And it gets dark, and Damian is brave, but he is six, and this is the worst stress he's been under in all his six years of life. He wants, desperately more than anything, to go home. Why wouldn't he? The only stable... semi-stable environment he was in just got ripped out from under his feet, literally! He wants his mother.

And it's not happening.

But there's something good to be said, at least. The imposter that looks like his father always comes and finds him, no matter what. He could have left that morning, and he will find Damian at midnight, frazzled and worried, and carrying an extra jacket with him because it is cold in Amity Park and Damian is six years old.

And sometimes Damian attacks him - he's scared and stressed and he doesn't want to be here. And every time he catches the sword. Even though Damian can see it cut into his hand and pearls of blood well up and stains his fingers. Even though Damian can see him wince in pain and bite his lip, he still catches it.

But with that little box, he coaxes Damian to come back with him. It's cold, it's dark, Amity Park is unsafe at night. They can figure something out tomorrow, please. And every time, he agrees, reluctantly. And the imposter takes the extra jacket he brought with -- a flannel, a hoodie, a jacket -- and he wraps it around him. It's warm, Damian's clothes are not that thick, and even though he thinks he might hate this imposter, he still sticks close to his legs as he leads him down the street.

And sometimes the imposter carries him, because Damian's shoes are not that thick, and he cuts his foot on broken glass while they're walking home. The imposter sits in the bathroom with him and carefully cleans the cut out, and makes sure it doesn't get infected.

There's hope you know, he still has it. His mother will be looking for him. She'll be worried. He's important to them. Damian may not be the original, but he is still a blood son. He is still her son. She will come find him. This nightmare will end soon. He can go home.

And then weeks pass, and nothing. Then months, and nothing. His family is not coming for him, and it hurts. Hurts more than anything. And yet while that happens, the boy he's attacked, and hurt, teaches himself arabic in order to speak to him. He takes Damian out of the house one afternoon and buys him new clothes, or tries to. And then he keeps buying him new clothes. He gives him blankets and gives up his bed to him until they can get him one himself, and steadily he teaches Damian english.

This boy is kind. Kinder than Damian's ever experienced, and he doesn't know what to do with it. He's devastated by the fact that he is not as important to his family as his family is to him. What do you do when you're six years old and you learn something like that? When a random stranger who looks like your father is kinder to you, and cares more about you than your family did?

And then Damian tells him he's a clone. He's Damian Wayne's clone, and he tells him his purpose - that their grandfather made him to kill him. And the boy, the imposter, Damian thinks he probably already knows that he's a clone. But he doesn't say that. He just nods, and asks him if he wants to tell his original about him.

Damian says no. He doesn't want to. He's tired of living in the shadow of his original. He wants to keep this to himself. This is his. For once, all of this is his.

And to his surprise, the imposter doesn't try and convince him otherwise. He just nods, and says okay. And when Damian asks why, the imposter - his brother - looks at him and says.

"I don't care about Damian Wayne. I care about you." And in Damian's gobsmacked silence, his brother continues. He tells him that if Damian doesn't want to tell his original that he exists, then they don't need to. They don't need to worry about the LoA going after him, because clearly if his 'grandfather' needs to make a clone of Damian in order to take him out, then whatever it was that Damian Wayne was doing to keep himself safe, was working.

"Wayne already has people in his corner, he's got Gotham's army of vigilantes to keep himself safe." his brother says with his eyes as blue as moonlight. "You, however. Do not." And he continues, and says that if Damian Wayne has the same training as Damian does, then he will be fine. He doesn't need to be aware of his clone. Because if DW doesn't know about Damian, then the LoA doesn't either.

And here's the thing. Damian would not have survived in the LoA for long. Not as a clone. No matter what, he was going to die no matter what he did, and sooner rather than later. The sword of Damocles was always hanging above his head in the League of Assassins.

That portal, and meeting Danny, saved his life. There's no way around it. And to an extent Damian knows this even at six years old. He may not be aware that he would've died, but he knows that meeting Danny was the best thing to happen to him.

It's no wonder after that, that Damian is as clingy to Danny as he is. Danny is the first person he's met to offer him unconditional love, with no strings attached, only pure affection.

[youremyheaven]

Krittika: The Tarzan Complex & Survival Strategies

TW: murder, rape, genocide, euthanasia, death, violence, misogyny

This is part 2 of my ongoing Krittika series. This research was commissioned by the wonderful, angelic and patient, @rscelestia-blog . Being commissioned to do nakshatra research by you guys makes me feel like I'm a renaissance artist and you guys are my Medici family ✨🥺🫶💛 I'm so grateful for it.

For this post, I wanted to look into how this nakshatra often manifests in men. Whenever I talk about how naks manifest irl, I am talking about a tendency not a rule. Astrology is not a perfect science and it is very much possible that someone could have these placements and not behave this way. Also there are hundreds of different tendencies for each nak, since every astrologer is a mere human being with limited knowledge, what they derive from their studies is perhaps only a handful of such possibilities. Therefore every nakshatra has vast room for interpretation.

All that said, I have often thought that Krittika men were a bit unrefined and mannerless for a long time. I think this broadly applies to Solar men in general because they're a "guy's guy". However, this observation was further cemented by an ask that I received a long time ago where an anon pointed out how many actors who have played Tarzan or Tarzan like characters have Krittika nakshatra.

I will be making a separate post about the 'feral child' trope and how its most acutely manifest in a different planetary type but for this post I want to focus on the 'uncivilized' nature of Krittika/Solar men.

I had mentioned in my previous Krittika post about how since Krittika nak follows Bharani where creation takes place, Krittika is about survival.

In fact, the theory of 'survival of the fittest' was put forward by another Solar man aka Charles Darwin, Uttarashadha Moon

The term was originally coined by Herbert Spencer, Ketu in Uttaraphalguni after reading Origin of the Species

 Alfred Russel Wallace, whose own theory about the mechanics of evolution was almost identical to Darwin's, had a Solar stellium (Mercury & Venus in Uttarashadha and Jupiter in Krittika)

In Nazi Germany, they appropriated Darwin's "survival of the fittest" to eradicate anybody who wasn't Aryan or 'fit'. One of the key proponents of the same was an officer named Alfred Rosenberg, Uttarashadha Sun who was hanged to death after the war. He helped advance involuntary euthanasia to eliminate mentally ill and disabled individuals.

Now, lets go into Tarzan.

Tarzan is from an aristocratic British family and after losing his parents, he is adopted by the leader of the ape tribe, among whom he is raised. He later experiences civilization, rejects it and returns to the wild.

Many actors who have played Tarzan have either Solar influence or Venusian influence. In the 2 dozen actors who have played this character, the majority are Venusian tbh but I'll explore that more on a separate post about Venusian men. I think its interesting how different aspects of this character fit these two planetary types.

Here are some men who have played Tarzan

Johnny Weissmuller, Mercury and Venus in Krittika

He played Tarzan in 12 films and Jungle Jim in another dozen films and its TV adaptations as well.

Bruce Bennett, Krittika Sun (unrelated but i find this pic so funny lmao)

Tony Goldwyn- Krittika Sun and Venus (atmakaraka)

He voiced Tarzan in the 90s film

Tarzan has always been played by other Solar natives like:

Wolf Larson- Uttaraphalguni Moon

Alexander Skarsgaard- Uttaraphalguni Stellium

Now when we think of Tarzan, what do we most associate with him? He is a man who was raised in the jungle by apes since he was a baby, so he is "uncivilized" and by most standards "lacking manners", he is wild, messy, uncouth, improper and defies all kinds of social norms. We usually associate "mannerlessness" with belonging to perhaps a lower class in society but here is where Krittika and Solar men surprise us. They behave this way despite all that they have. They could be from immensely privileged backgrounds and still act like jungle freaks.

They lack social charisma, grace or "politeness". Tarzan is very independent because he was raised in the jungle where he had to learn how to fend for himself. Similarly, Solar individuals also tend to be very socially independent which means they're often not the best at interacting on a group level. In order to be sociable, you have to emotionally connect with others, Tarzan's early life is not something anybody else can connect to, even if he adopts a more "civilized" behaviour, he's still going to stand out because of how he's lived his life. Even if they're welcomed into and accepted by society, Solar individuals struggle to relate to and emotionally connect to them.

Sun naks are generally known for being a bit emotion-less but in Krittika this manifests in a very "each for himself/herself" mentality that ISNT self-serving. I would say Krittika natives are the least selfish and most service oriented of all the 3 Sun nakshatras. They know that its a dog eat dog world, so they almost have a tendency to be the one who does all the brunt work so that their loved ones can be spared of it?

I'll mention some examples of "mannerless" Krittika men now:

Howard Stern, Uttarashada Sun Krittika Rising

This guy straight up is so RUDE and crass and vulgar with ALL of his guests????

Here is him talking to Matthew McConaughey about his father dying and Matt is no better in this clip either but like wtf?? who talks like that???

Lowkey Solar individuals LOVE to gossip and start shit between people.

Here is a compilation of him being creepy and disgusting to women on his show.

Dana Plato, the actress, committed suicide a day after appearing on his show in 1999. The humiliation she endured is said to have been her breaking point. Her son committed suicide on the 11th anniversary of her death.

When I tell you Solar men are emotionally abusive, either by being avoidant and ignoring you or by being condescending, patronising, openly mocking you and treating you like shit, BELIEVE ME.

Jordan Peterson- Krittika Rising

I dont know if I need to explain why Jordan is a mannerless misogynistic asshole.

Here are some remarks made by Kate Manne, a feminist expert, who critiqued Jordan's work:

"There’s an interesting moment in the book where Peterson talks about resentment as a “revelatory” emotion that can mean one of two things. One, you feel it because you’re immature, in which case you just need to buck up. Two, you feel resentment because you really are being oppressed or taken advantage of somehow. Your resentment shows you that something needs to change or that you need to assert yourself in relation to other people.

But there is clearly a third possibility. People often feel resentful because they appear, based on historically entrenched social norms, to be getting a bad bargain, when what’s actually happening is that others are getting a somewhat fairer deal. When you’re accustomed to unjust privilege, equality feels like oppression, as the saying goes." (link to the whole article)

This is such a classic example of the way Solar individuals think. They don't really think in terms of privilege, justice, fairness etc??? They just think you can work hard enough to erase all the other socio-economic-political barriers that make things harder for others?? This is of course until they've had first hand experience of difficulties of this sort lmao but they are naturally not wired to think too much, they're very simple minded, like Tarzan, that's why Sun is the most Yang of energies. Its a very action-goal oriented line of thought. They are almost incapable of thinking in abstract or trying to see things within the context and subtext in which it has occurred.

This is also why they are often very academically gifted. Naturally intelligent people struggle the most in school because their brains are not wired to endure the structure and mechanical system of learning that our education system enforces. Intelligence by definition necessitates that the person possessing it is capable of thinking unconventionally and that means finding the school environment really limiting or restrictive bc schools fr be killing the joy of learning.

Solar individuals thrive within these systems because they seldom, if ever, question the system itself, they just learn their material and write the exam. They do not think "unconventionally" or beyond the binary in any way. They accept what they learn to be true and they are more focused on working within the system to climb its ranks. If this is the system we're in, they want to be THE BEST in it and they will master all of its rules to work with it to beat it??

This is why all Solar naks are at the very top of the caste hierarchy, Krittika is a Brahmin nak whereas Uttaraphalguni & Uttarashadha are both Kshatriya naks

Solar individuals are lowkey one of the least empathetic types. I dont mean this to be harsh but they're not very emotionally intelligent and its really hard for them to read a room or intuitively pick up on how someone's feeling/what's on their mind. You reallyyyy need to spell things out for them. It does not come to them naturally to understand how others think or to put themselves in the shoes of others because for Solar individuals everything is kind of a competition and when its a battle of survival, you dont stop to think how your opponents are feeling? this is not to say that they're in "survival mode",, Solars are too unbothered to be in fight or flight 24/7, its just the Tarzan mindset tbh. If you're an animal in the jungle, the jungle is your home, you understand how it operates, how you must hunt or starve, you know what your odds are, you cant be here feeling too empathetic towards other creatures knowing full well that you have to hunt them down and eat them or otherwise starve yourself to death. Animals are comfortable, secure and chill in their habitat but they also understand the stakes so they're always survival minded? Because it truly is each for his/her own out there.

Mark Wahlberg- Krittika Stellium (Mercury, Venus AK and Saturn)

Wahlberg is an A class asshole. In the 80s he assaulted two elderly Vietnamese men and a group of black children all the while hurling racist abuses at them.

Here is a clip from one of his movies:

I know its a film but this is for real how Solar men view the world. They see everything as a "conquest". (Tarzan mentality)

The simple minded Tarzan mentality is also why in the books and movies, Tarzan is unable to cope with civilization and returns to the jungle. The author said it's because Tarzan saw the world as too corrupt which is perhaps true but it's also because having lived in a jungle where the ruled are pretty simple and standard, being a member of society means adhering to many unspoken ruled and conventions. Solar individuals find it THE hardest to do so and when they're actual being true to themselves, they act like apes of the Howard Stern school.

Salvador Dali, Krittika Stellium (Sun, Mercury & Mars)

To make matters worse, he was UBP Moon (the influence of multiple malefic planets makes one more prone to being an asshole) and I have extensively covered his wrongdoings in my post about Saturnian men

However, for now I want to focus on how Dali was a Nazi sympathizer,

He was also obsessed with Hitler in a perverse way and apparently had homoerotic fantasies of him lmao??

He was once quoted as saying:

"I often dreamed of Hitler as a woman. His flesh, which I had imagined whiter than white, ravished me… There was no reason for me to stop telling one and all that to me Hitler embodied the perfect image of the great masochist who would unleash a world war solely for the pleasure of losing and burying himself beneath the rubble of an empire; the gratuitous action par excellence that should indeed have warranted the admiration of the Surrealists."

He was a big old fascist who also supported the Spanish dictator Franco which made Picasso stop talking to him for the rest of his life.

In 1975, when General Franco executed many people, hundreds and thousands of fascists gathered in support of Franco, chanting his name and making fascists salutes. When the world condemned this appalling act, Dali praised Franco and called him the “greatest hero of Spain.”

George Orwell, a strong critic of the fascist rule in Spain, despised Dali and wrote —

“During the Spanish Civil War, he astutely avoids taking sides and makes a trip to Italy. He feels himself more and more drawn towards the aristocracy, frequents smart salons, finds himself wealthy patrons, and is photographed with the plump Vicomte de Noailles, whom he describes as his ‘Maecenas.’”

Salvador Dali was nicknamed ávida dollars (“eager for dollars”) by his former surrealist friends for selling his consciousness and idealism for money and fame.

Average Solar behaviour

When I talk about Tarzan mentality, I'm referring to how lions dont feel remorse at the thought of killing deers. Its not in their nature to feel remorse. The hierarchy of the eco system is such that lions are predators and its their job to hunt. They are by biological design, carnivores. Its a bit sickening to think of how like animals, who have no choice but to be brutal to survive, Solar individuals often have this ruthless ambition to do absolutely anything to get ahead in life. The world we live in, is a capitalist, patriarchal world and the people who thrive in it are ones who are willing to overlook or dont see the faults in the system at all.

The ones who sit at the very top of the pyramid did not get there by being compassionate angels. 3/4 Brahmin caste naks are "ugra" or violent nakshatras, Krittika is the exception, as it is a "mishra" nakshatra (mishra means "mixed"). The ones at the very top are the most brutal and fierce. There is no other way to get to the top in this world.

Carrie Fisher, Krittika Moon

The singer James Blunt (Shatabhisha stellium) who was besties with Carrie, wrote in his memoir:

“I was closer to Carrie than almost anyone else in the world, except my wife. She told me which girlfriends weren’t suitable, was the first person I told when I met my wife, and we chose engagement rings for her together.

She also knew where every unmarked grave of mine lay and where every guilt stemmed from. She was complicit too. When I arrived home one morning with a love bite on my neck, and my girlfriend of the moment about to arrive, Carrie grabbed her 16-year-old daughter and gave her a love bite as well.

Then Carrie summoned me over, offering her own neck, and told me to give her a love bite. When the girlfriend arrived, we all had love bites.

There was also an issue with drugs. Carrie had long been open about her addiction, but at some point it was obvious enough to be of concern.

I stood many times at the foot of her bed at 3am listening to the laboured breathing of someone sounding close to death on heavy medication. Not long before she died, I asked her to be godmother to my son, telling her that I wanted her to take care of herself so that he might know her when he grew up.

Charlie, her best friend, confronted her more directly and told her she needed to quit drugs, but was ostracised by her as a result. I took a different approach and did them with her, pretending to myself that I would guide her to redemption one day – just not today.

The lies we tell ourselves are the ­hardest to forgive. As a result, her ­daughter Billie blames me in part for her death, and no longer speaks to me. They buried Carrie’s ashes in a giant ceramic Prozac pill. You can see a picture of it on the CD disc of my first album. There are only two of them in the world, and the other one is my most treasured possession.”

Krittika being a "mishra" or mixed nak means that its just as capable of being tender as it is of being destructive. There are only 2 mishra naks. The other one is Vishaka.

Carrie took James in before he had even made his debut and he lived with her and recorded the songs of his first album in her house. They had a long lasting friendship, all of this points to the kind, nurturing, almost maternal nature of Krittika but the other behaviour he mentioned, including the love bite giving lmao?? Krittika is a Solar nak and they wouldnt be who they are if they weren't competitive for no reason lol and ostracizing people who mean well??? Solarcore AF

I assure you trying to give advice to a Solar is pointless because like the Sun, they too are blinded by their own light, they see nothing, they comprehend nothing except their own projections. Plato's allegory of the cave was about Solars, I swear lmao. The truth can be very very obvious to absolutely everybody else but a Solar WILL NOT SEE IT

They embody this meme:

They're very low on emotional intelligence tbh. You could tell a Solar that someone almost murdered you and they'd be like "oh he's not very nice, is he?" 😭😭😭 I think it's also part of their simple minded Tarzan thinking. They take everything at face value and are straightforward to a fault. They just don't know or understand how crooked people can be.

I have Krittika Moon friend who is dating a Hasta Moon man (Solar x Lunar couples 🤧) and he was disgusting to me IN FRONT OF HER and he's been nasty af to many other women we all know and she wasn't his girlfriend at the time. But even after she knew all of this, she went on to date him and now they've been together for over a year lmao 🤮🤢🤮

They do not see the faults with themselves or with people they love. They live in a bubble of delulu and completely believe that all that glitters IS GOLD. They can be soooo naive, its insane. Theyre naive girls in bad bitch packaging.

Solar individuals struggle more than any other type to understand that things are not always black and white and that real life is veryyy complicated because people are complicated. In the jungle, such abstractions do not exist, things are very black and white, you can easily arrive at solutions by thinking in a very binary way. Sun nakshatras are focused on survival and this mentality warps their mindset from perceiving things in a more complex and nuanced way.

I want to emphasize once more that survival mentality is NOT being in flight/fight mode,, its more so about operating from a place of maximum efficiency and cutting out all the unnecessary bullshit. But being in survival mode is not living. We are not animals and there is more to life than just...surviving.. and thriving..

Solar individuals are the type for whom every kind of experience is a status symbol of some sort. Be it being desired, succeeding at school/work, making x amount of money, they dgaf about "enjoying" things, they are absolutely not the "stop to smell the roses" type, they want to be like the people who they envy or look up to, they want all those markers of success. Ask them about their motivations and you'll seldom hear of an emotional one.

They're mostly driven by a need to do well in life just because. We live in a world where money is king, and where certain things are conventional indicators of success and even if they have absolutely no desire for a certain kind of house, or car or brand or relationship, they do not want to be perceived as someone who is incapable of having it???? so they work hard to get it?? They get it for show, basically.

There is a reason why the ONLY nak without a yoni consort is a Solar nakshatra (Uttarashada). The height of Solar energy is such that its truly each for his/her own, no partners whatsoever.

Jack London, Uttarashadha Sun

He wrote books like a The Call of the Wild and numerous other adventure stories which are all about surviving in the wild by yourself lol

Its funny how literally the themes of certain naks and planetary influences are made manifest

 Richard Gadd- Krittika Sun and Venus

He is the star and maker of Baby Reindeer, which, if you really think about it, is a survival story. You have got to ask yourself is someone subject you to brutal stalking of the kind Gadd was subject to, would you spend YEARS of your career performing and reliving it? There could be many reasons why he chose to do so and many have found it highly problematic how a man whose privacy was so brutally invaded for so long would do so little to properly hide the identities of the real people he's talking about (his stalker was found out by netizens and she's been receiving death threats etc).

I feel like it points to the nature of the Sun. They will have the last word always and even when they're losing, they'll drag you down with them. But beyond that, I feel like it points to the ambition and tenacity of Krittika and their sheer will power.

Pitbull, Uttarashadha Sun, Krittika Moon & Rising

His life story is extremely Solar

The "American dream" tbh is a very Yang one and a very Solar one

He was born in USA to immigrant parents.His family has a history of fighting against the Castro regime in Cuba. When he was three, he could recite the works of Cuban national hero and poet José Martí in Spanish. He learned English by watching Sesame Street as a child. His father was largely absent from his childhood; his parents separated when he was young, and he was raised mostly by his mother, later stating: "my mom is my father and my mother." He briefly stayed with a foster family in Roswell, Georgia. His parents struggled with substance abuse; as a teenager, he was also involved with drug use and dealing, which eventually led to him getting kicked out of the family house.

Divorce, war, natural calamities, destruction of any kind is veryyy common for people born under Krittika, Ardra, Uttarashadha, Jyeshta, Ashlesha nakshatras.

Pitbull's parents were separated, they fled Cuba, he was kicked out and was literally left to fend for himself.

He said he chose his stage name of Pitbull because the dogs "bite to lock. The dog is too stupid to lose. And they're outlawed in Dade County. They're basically everything that I am. It's been a constant fight". Literally so Solarcoded??

I'll end this post here, I have more posts to come about Krittika and Solar naks so stay tuned. I hope this was insightful

I am sooooo sorry that I have been soooo slow with my uploads lately,, I just have a lot on my plate atm 😭😭😭I am going to try my best to be more consistent cause I want to finish this series asap as I have several other pending posts to make UGHH

[fabricated-misslieness]

ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢ: neteyam x metkayina gn reader

ꜱᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ: Even as a member of a clan of Ocean folk, on an island within a huge archipelago, you have found a special place in the forest. You decide Neteyam is worthy enough to know about it.

ᴀɴᴏɴ: i'd like to request a neteyam x reader where reader shows him some secret spot beautiful part of the ocean or the reef or the jungle and he's mesmerized and they have a soft moment <3

ʀᴇ𝐐: yes ~ ᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴄᴏᴜɴᴛ: 1592

ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢꜱ: swearing

ᴍᴀʏʙ'ꜱ ɴᴏᴛᴇ: this is cute

☾⋆☆⋆☽

"Nete."

"Hm?"

When Neteyam turns, he finds your smile first. Then, he takes the rest of you in. You've got your hands behind your back and you're bouncing on the balls of your feet. It's cute, but... he raises a browbone, "What is it?"

"I've got something to show you." You declare excitedly.

"Something?"

"Well, a place."

"Hm," He thinks about it, "that sound suspicious."

"Trust me." You swing your hands forward, crossing them before swishing them away from each other, "It's something good. I'm not up to anything bad."

He's still not convinced. "Right."

"Come onnn!" You whine, bouncing more furiously on your feet. "It's really great, I promise."

"Okay." He replies, which brightens your grin that much more. "Let's go."

☾⋆☆⋆☽

He expected something within the sea, not within the jungle. Though he had been curious ever since he'd step foot on Awa'atlu, his father stated that it was important to focus on the sea and its way. He didn't mention the idea of the jungle at all, but he knew that his children had taken notice of it. It was implied in his speech that they mustn't explore the Jungle.

But something else implied was a not yet.

"You know, I don't think we're allowed here."

Neteyam followed close behind you. Though he was used to forests and jungles, he wasn't used to this one. It was beautiful still, and most importantly, different from the Hallelujah Mountains and the jungles below. Plus, a lot more humid.

"You'd be right about that." You chuckled. "But hey, what's the fun if you don't break any rules?"

Neteyam purses his lips and slows down, something you take notice of. You turn back to him, inquisitive look on your face. "Nete? Something wrong?"

Breaking the rules. It was getting close to curfew, his father had (though implied) prohibited him from entering the jungle, and who knows what the Metkayina thought about this place.

But what was the harm in it? He was just exploring. The shame builds in his shoulders, but he shakes if off. You were going to show him something. He'll be damned if he doesn't at least indulge you. "Nothing."

Your lips grow into a smile, and with the wave of your hand you beckon him forward.

There's a pond ahead, cutting through the trees. It doesn't have much of a shore at all, only small rocks about the size of Na'vi feet in order to cross.

You jump across the rocks quick and nimble, as if you'd done it a thousand times before. He doesn't doubt that you have. He follows along behind you, though the pond catches his eyes. It was extremely bioluminescent, glowing light purple at the edges and baby blue around the center. Water plants grew anywhere and everywhere, as reeds around the rim and big leafy pads with flowers around the middle. They added a nice green to compliment the other colors.

Distracted by the pond, Neteyam almost slips. Almost.

Before he can even dip so much as a toe in the water, you grab a hold of his wrist and successfully stop him from falling in. "Careful. This pond is poisonous."

"What?!" Neteyam exclaims, quick to move his foot onto the rock pathway.

"Looks harmless, right?" You chuckle at his reaction, turning forward again. "Don't fall in. I don't want your blood on my hands."

He huffs, "You underestimate me."

"Oh?" You begin, your tone condescending. "Says the one who almost fell in."

He hisses playfully.

Once you cross to the other side safely, you turn around. Neteyam's gaze follows you curiously.

He doesn't have the time, nor the reflexes fast enough to stop you as you dip your toe in the water. "What the fuck, (y/n)?" He shouts, "You just told me–"

"Ta-da!" You bring your foot out of the water and demonstrate it with pride. "I'm poisoned!"

Neteyam knew poison when he saw it (probably) and he knew this was not poison. Instead, your toe was covered with a mysterious dark green plant he couldn't name. "(y/n)..." He groans.

"Not poisonous, clearly." You snicker, bringing your foot in the air and flicking the plant off your toe. "Just mucky."

He rolls his eyes.

The glow of the surface did well to hide the mucky web of plants below. If he had fallen in, it'd be like getting mud all over him, and then you'd have to take a detour to the lake. That required time you didn't have.

"Let's just keep going."

☾⋆☆⋆☽

You had picked up light conversation as you headed to your promised place. He didn't know much about it, though he asked you plenty. You wanted to keep it a surprise. Him being in the dark meant he didn't know where it was, or where it began; but when he steps into the clearing, he knows this is the place.

He takes slow, cautious steps. His head turns this way and that way every time something new catches his eye and something new happens every second.

It is so beautiful.

Two more steps forward, and he stops entirely. It's just his head, his eyes, and they move constantly. He takes it all in.

It is amazing.

It is a menagerie of bioluminescence, natural glows, every color he could even name, all clashing yet all mixing wonderfully. When you take him by the hand to a log so that you may sit down, he hardly registers the movement.

Ahead of the log, ahead of you, is a small waterfall. The heart of the island held a set of multiple waterfalls, all leading into lakes, all leading into other waterfalls, until they reached the lake at the very bottom.

This place, this clearing, had its own waterfall. The heart of the island wouldn't be a very ideal place to hang out. The waterfalls were so very loud, and there were so very many of them.

Here, however, it is just far enough and just small enough that Neteyam can hear everything.

And everything mesmerizes him.

"Do you like it?"

"I love it."

You smile at that. It was a sight you had grown used to, yet a sight you loved. It was beautiful, the way each glow of a differing color shined on his face. It was beautiful, how his big eyes were blown even wider as he strived to see everything. It was beautiful, the smile trained on his lips.

"See, I don't know anything about the Omatikaya." He doesn't look at you, too entranced with everything else, but you can tell by the perk of his ear that he's listening. "And I'd like to learn about them, about you. But I do know... I do know that they–you lived in a forest. And I thought, well, maybe you would enjoy this."

"Enjoy is..." He lets out a breath that turns into a laugh, "an understatement."

"Yeah." You say, grin growing as wide as his. "I can see that now."

"The ocean is beautiful. The wildlife there, is wide and diverse. I don't see animals here, not often. I only see small things that run when they see me too. I see bugs that, in a second, escape my sight. The big things, the predators that the Olo'eyktan warns us about, I never see.

"We Metkayina, and possibly every animal around us, have adapted to the ocean. The sea, the water, the fish, the Tulkun, we have in abundance.

"So we often forget this is here."

"The plants are here." Neteyam points out the obvious, because it is what is at the forefront of his mind. He doesn't notice how dumb it may be.

"Yes," You chuckle, "the plants remembered. The plants, these ones, they stayed here. And they looked at this place, this little waterfall, and decided this is where they wanted to thrive."

"It's a beautiful place." He remarks.

A silence... then, "Maybe not as beautiful as you."

Neteyam turns to you, finally, for the first time he set foot here. Shock is written all over his face, but the compliment doesn't draw his features into a sour picture. "What?"

"Sorry, I–Well, I thought, you know..." You sputter for an excuse, but then realize you don't need one because fuck it. "Okay, you know what? You're beautiful."

"I–You, uh, th–um..." He, too, sputters for something to say. Anything at all. He only finds three words, only three little words that were suitable enough. "I see you."

Your brow bones raise, along with everything else on your face, with surprise. "In the midst of all of this?"

"Yes." He nods his head, scooting closer to you. Your knees touch. "I see you. Because this place is everything to me, a piece of my home in the Metkayina jungle, but you're the one who showed it to me, and you're the one I truly care about."

"A couple seconds ago," You begin, your exhale coming out a shocked laugh, "you wouldn't even look at me."

"(y/n)." His voice gives off the tiniest whine when you point it out.

"Okay, sorry." You shake your head with closed eyes. When you open them back up, his eyes are still trained on you, fully attentive. They're big and round and golden, unlike your blue ones, and they look perfect. "I see you."

In the midst of it all, where everything glowed, where everything was beautiful, where everything was colorful, where everything called for your attention, you saw each other.

He saw you, and you could only see him.

[bignosebaby]

The monkeys in clothes at the tip of an animal cruelty iceberg

(TW for discussion of animal abuse)

Reaction images are a popular staple of online culture, and in recent years primates have grown substantially in popularity. Orangutans, chimpanzees, gorillas, and monkeys of all species have become the subject of online meme pages. Many of these pages, especially those run by self-described primate enthusiasts post images from accredited zoos and sanctuaries with individuals such as Shabani the gorilla, Kanzi the bonobo, Beni of orangutan jungle school fame, and others known for exhibiting amusing natural behaviour at the forefront.

[Image ID: A meme from monkey.posting of 2 photos on a white background with black text. The text reads: “*Our First Date*” With “Her” above a photo of a thin person with long dark hair wearing a white t-shirt and black mini skirt taking a mirror selfie with an iphone and “Me” above a photo of an adult orangutan with a blue blanket draped over its head. End ID]

Memes like this are widely enjoyed and harmless. The primates are engaging in natural behaviours, the pictures in the memes are primarily sourced from the social media accounts of zoos and sanctuaries, and the consumers of the memes are animal lovers. Further from the primate posters of Instagram and Tumblr, other primate pictures are used. These pictures more commonly depict monkeys in baby clothes, in urban settings, being fed by tourists, and grimacing or swatting. The original context for these pictures is lost, and they are reposted with relatable captions, like the image below.

[Image ID: a baby macaque in a fuzzy purple hoodie wearing lipstick, purple eyeshadow, and eyeliner with its eyes closed. The caption is overlayed and reads “i pretend i do not see it.......”. End ID]

What the average person who posts these reaction images sees is a funny picture, and with the rapid rate of posting and viewing the idea of interrogating the background of every meme and image you see online seems exhausting, and ridiculous. However, the one piece of context that connects every image of a primate in baby clothes is that these images all depict animal cruelty. Not only that, but the producers of these images are making money off of animal abuse.

Monkeys are extremely intelligent and have very demanding social, physical, and intellectual needs. No pet primate is living a life that can meet these needs, which would involve massive enclosures with diverse diets, many other monkeys to form relationships with, and daily enrichment. While some pet primate owners try to give their unfortunate and expensive pets the best life they can, on YouTube and other social media sites the algorithm rules and leads to dark places.

A regular viewer of monkey and ape videos will be recommended videos of pet primates at an increasing frequency, with abuse and neglect becoming more and more common. In a BBC article studying the online groups of dedicated “monkey haters“ whom delight in videos depicting the abuse and neglect of monkeys, the algorithmic pipeline towards animal abuse is documented: “Kapetanich saw monkeys dressed up in baby clothes, monkeys being bathed, forced to walk upright or do other unnatural tasks. Then the algorithm served her videos of monkeys being slapped and sprayed with water. These videos violated YouTube’s terms of service, so she reported them, but the platform didn’t seem to take any action." Without ever leaving YouTube or actively searching, a regular person was served videos of baby monkeys being abused. After continued viewership, YouTube recommended a video of baby monkeys being tortured. Most shocking of all, is that the comments on these videos are mostly supportive, with many suggesting torture methods they want to see in future videos. Some monkey haters are willing to pay, and contact pet primate owners who post videos of them scolding or pushing their monkeys with requests for more brutal punishments.

The BBC article is here for those who wish to read, but I warn against those sensitive to disturbing articles to avoid or do so with caution. While my mission stays on social media and the clear web, the article dives into the dark web and encrypted telegram groups where the most extreme animal abusers congregate. My point is not to disturb people, but to educate on how even innocent looking images of dressed up monkeys are the start of a pipeline that leads to animal abuse. In fact, many of the exact same monkeys start their lives as dress up candidates and end their lives before reaching adulthood, as their owners profit off their suffering.

What can you do?

No one likes to think that they are involved, even implicitly, in the suffering of others. Many critiques of reaction images featuring abused animals will be met with dismissals, that “it’s not that deep“. While it is not your fault that animals are being abused if you shared images of dressed-up monkeys online, using these images normalizes the most socially acceptable form of their mistreatment. There are small and simple changes to your online presence you can make to help:

Use reaction images of primates from wildlife photographers, zoogoers, and the social media accounts of high-quality zoos and sanctuaries.

Report images and videos of animal mistreatment you see on social media as animal cruelty.

Contact YouTube and other social media sites such as Instagram and Facebook to tell them that hosting animal abuse videos and images is unacceptable.

You don’t need to be an expert in primate welfare! Avoiding any photos where a primate is clothed is enough to reduce your chances of accidentally using images depicting abuse by a substantial margin. Being mindful, kind, and open to learning goes a long way.

[jahsontodd]

✨rating pedro pascal characters based on nothing but costuming (non-exhaustive)✨

considerations:

*real housewives voice* thats my OPINION!!! also subject to change upon reflection, just going off my current feelings. 

not really discussing whether the costuming is good or bad for character, context, or source material but just how much I like them if that makes sense. 

some of these costume designers knocked it out of the park but would I be a little grumpy if I went on a date and they showed up in a walmart denim button up and ripped their $300+ jacket to shreds? Yes. Was that costume absolutely perfect for Joel? Yes again.

Mostly discussing costuming in context modern/21st century settings. The Mandalorian+GOT+ etc. in part two?

Minimal discussion on hair+cosmetics, only really when it applies to the whole look

Javier Gutierrez: The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent

Rating: 10/10

Crew:

Paco Delgado: Costume Designer see also: John Wick: Chapter 4, Death on the Nile, Jungle Cruise, Cats (2019), Split, Les Misérables 2012 (and many more he’s booked and busy)

full cast and crew

Comments: 

They did not have to go so crazy on these outfits!!! 

Why does one of my favorite looks apparently not even appear in the movie!?

every look is so *chefs kiss*

I feel like mustard yellow is such a good color on him. 

Like call up those people on tik tok who make nonsensical categories like “strong winter” “ambivalent fall” and find out why mustard yellow always works.

The palette is a cute mix of like warm bricky colors like red, brown, mustard yellow mixed with baby blue and eggshell white. its actually perfect. 

What really makes him stand out is the fact he accessorizes. 

Lots of men don't accessorize because they don’t think its important - they couldn’t be more wrong. 

It’s one of the many injustices of the world that a man’s outfit looks 10x better by adding one necklace or in this case- pinky ring.

Do I like the sunglasses? No. But I like that they are there. 

Obligatory hair mention: The hair looks great. With longer hair becomes more responsibility, ie sometimes the part is a little too deep making the front pieces have a combover look. This is only when its messy though so that may have been the point?

If I included every outfit I liked it would just be a slideshow of the whole movie so I picked my favorites 

Javier Peña: Narcos

Rating: 10/10

Crew:

Bina Daigler: Costume Designer (season 1) see also: Dumplin’, Tár, Mulan (2020), 1899

María Estela Fernánde: Costume Designer (season 2-3) see also: Narcos: Mexico, Queen of the South, Hell (El Infierno)

Mayra de Abreu: Wardrobe Supervisor (season 1) key costumer for (season 2-3) see also: Narcos: Mexico, The Head of Joaquín Murrieta (La Cabeza de Joaquín Murrieta)

full cast and crew

Comments: 

Can you tell I like 70s inspos?

Its unique but true to someone who grew up in RGV and now on his own

ie good luck getting him out of boots. you can’t do it

When he dresses up in s1+2, damn i love a tan suit! 

Its very formulaic, but not to the extent that it looks like he bought 7 colors of the exact same shirt. He’s pretty much always wearing a short sleeve button up and fitted jeans. which makes the times he isn’t stand out

ie the tan suit. what can i say i am an american who is up to date on politics i always defend a tan suit when i see one

also occasionally breaks out this like tan vest situation? 

I think it’s a good balance between like clearly not being inspired by like their “current day” but not so 70s that it would be odd. It’s kinda timeless. 

He tends to follow one of my outfits rules: max 3 colors

Rules are meant to be broken obvi 

But I do feel like as a general rule of thumb and since he doesn’t wear a ton of patterns, wearing more than three colors starts to make an outfit look random and not put together

For Javi, this usually means 

color 1: *shirt color* 

color 2: pants (pretty much just blue or black, he does throw in some brown pants) 

color 3: brown (pretty exclusively wears brown belts/shoes)

Short note on hair/grooming: I love how season 1 has some more length in the back and generally has a shaggy sort of look? By season 3 his hair is more cropped probably bc of his new role. 

Something about the extra length in the back makes him look young- not in the sense of like actual age but maybe looking more hopeful or green, even when dressed up 

Also every so often you can see when they mess up the stick on sideburns. It tickles me.

He’s a menace to society. And he knows it 

Pietro Alvarez: If Beale Street Could Talk

Rating:  8/10

Crew:

Caroline Eselin (Caroline Eselin-Schaefer): Costume Designer see also: Moonlight (2016), Father of the Bride, Troop Zero, The Underground Railroad

full cast and crew

Comments:

We don’t see much and what we see! Is so good

This deep deep red is very nice and I like that is a monochromatic look (I don’t think we see his pants in the movie but collecting pics for this I saw the pants are the same color) 

It also has my favorite type of collar- that extra pointy extra long collar. 

And he *drum rolls* accessorized! Its only a necklace but the choice to have it OVER the shirt, over an already perfectly monochrome outfit makes it pop

The things that bring it a little down for me is, well, there is only one scene to work with so it feels wrong to rank higher than projects with multiple outfits, and the grooming

The mustache didn’t have to be so thin. 

Hair wise I don’t understand why we always have to exaggerate the side burns to achieve the “deep sideburn” look. 

I feel like we could still make the hair look “of the time” by taking some of the weight from the sides and leaving it up top and working with his natural side burns (even if that means making them darker, just not necessarily longer)

Even though I get the hair of the time was very um... spherical

side note: everyone in this movie is dressed spectacularly. I am appreciating through the tears in my eyes

Jack Daniels: Kingsman: Golden Circle

Rating: 7/10

Crew:

Arianne Phillips: Costume Designer See Also: Don’t Worry Darling, Once Upon a Time in Hollywood, Nocturnal Animals, Kingsman: The Secret Service

Full cast and crew

Comments:

Have I watched in full? Maybe a few years ago? I remember the first one quite clearly bc the water filling up the bedroom scene YIKES!

The snowsuit is so good. It’s functional, it’s sassy. It has one of my favorite western top details I don’t know the name of but the little patch details on the front of the shoulders. 

Who’s idea was it for the belt buckle to be a FLASK!!! thats gold

I love a color SCHEME!!! 

brown leather deserves love

The rain boots- a practical choice in the middle of like the least practical movie ever? Leave him in cowboy boots you cowards

Like oh the grounds might get muddy he needs rain boots. His belt buckle was a flask guys be real

Marcus Pike: The Mentalist

Rating: 5/10

Crew:

Amanda Friedland: Costumer Designer See also: 13 Reasons Why, House of 1000 Corpses, Terminator: the Sarah Connor Chronicles, Fight Club, Clueless,

Scott O’Leary: Costume Designer See Also: The Rookie, Lucifer, Supergirl, 21 Jumpstreet

full cast and crew

Comments:

Have I watched in full? No. I caught a few episodes it was when it was airing but I don’t think i could tell you a single plot line 

(there is a LOT of FBI Department of Pseudo Psychology shows ok)

I do remember in one of his early eps they use the murder house from Nightcrawlers.

*Abby Lee voice* you didn’t stick out to me

Very government employee of you to wear ill fitting suits

Not to be irrational but v-neck t shirts don’t rub me the right way. 

This is a completely personal ick that I don’t expect anyone else to agree with. 

I just ~~ just do a crew neck you know? 

Maybe WHY I don’t like it is because its very 2010-2014. 

Which, in Marcus’ defense, just makes v-neck t-shirts something of the time 

Does nothing crazy with his suits, but nothing that makes me cover my eyes either 

Joel Miller: The Last of Us

Rating: 6/10

Crew:

Cynthia Anne Summers: Costume Designer See also: Swan Song, The Babysitters Club, Snowpiercer, A Series of Unfortunate Events (2018), Apollo 18

Full cast and crew

Comments:

Joel we get it you are nOT like other girls 

It makes sense for who he is. 

And who he is is someone who is not thinking about how much cunt he is going to serve with his outfit that day. 

unFORTUNATELY.

His pants ARE suspiciously fitted. Not so utilitarian when it comes to pants are you Joel?

But! I love the big coat. Could live in the big coat. The big coat deserves an award

The best part of the big coat is the main defense against the simplicity of Joel’s outfits are “oh it’s the apocalypse” or “oh he’s not thinking about that” 

Really? bc this is a SHEARLING lined coat. Do you know how quickly those fluffy shearling/sherpa etc. liners start to look like shit? if its a real shearling lining (the one he uses is real) you need to avoid getting it wet and store in dry areas. 

I am not even talking about price here! Because I have already explained why I think its not that weird to have people wearing expensive clothes 20 years into the apocalypse. 

Its the utility of having a shearling lined coat when you don’t have a closet full of DampRids

No way he had it in Boston since they only travel with regular sized backpacks. He saw it, liked it, wanted it, got it. 

He got that coat for the cunt of it all, you can’t convince me otherwise. 

Thank you so much for coming on this ride with me it was a fun exercise to look at just the clothes and not my feelings toward the character/movie/show. 

Who should I do next time? I have plenty of more thoughts hehe

~Tags for amiges who wanted to see this post!~

@fuckyeahpedropascal​ @simpingcowboy​

[dirtytransmasc]

What do you think Spider’s home life with the McCoskers was like, any theories and ideas? It had to have been bad if Quaritch was considered to be a better candidate for a father figure.

these are more headcanons than theories, but tomato tamato. none of this is explicitly canon (to my knowledge). tw for domestic/child abuse.

nash was smart enough to not hit his kids, but he would make physical threats, grab them back the collars of their shirts, push them around, etc.

nash is very strict; each kid has a list of chores, have to live almost military-like, up at the crack of dawn, strict bedtime, etc. any deviation from his expectation would mean a crackdown.

the kids were pinned against each other, the bio brothers v. spider. both were manipulated to see the other as free. nash's boys were allowed to act out towards spider and received their father love, but were never allowed to stray far from their little home in the compound. spider was allowed to disappear for hours every day, no limits and no rules, but spider is horribly neglected. both hate each other because they have what the other wants so desperately, freedom v. family. they have an awful relationship because both are so blinded by what they want to see that no one is happy, no one is safe in that home, and that no one could envy the other.

nash stopped feeding spider when he learned to hunt, saying he had learned plenty enough to provide for himself and that if he'd rather stay out in the jungle all day and whatever part of the night he could get away with, he could eat out there.

Mary is not a caring mother to spider, she does the bare minimum, and that's even an overstatment; she does enough that it isn't obvious she doesn't care and therefore won't bring shame to her.

she allows nash to scapegoat spider not because she too is necessarily abusive herself, but because it keeps nash's temper off of her and her boys.

mary has voiced many times that spider is not her son, to his face. nash has done this as well but its a lot more consistent, he doesn't have to be in any sort of mood to say it. they barely play pretend for other people.

while both parents use spider's constant absence to taunt him, they're happy he's out of their care for most of the day.

as a baby spider was typically kept in a crib or allowed to run around the lab, not getting much attention from his foster family. this led to them just leaving spider to his own devices, even encouraged to leave the confines of the room only to then be punished and blamed for being in other's ways.

I think they were you average 'military dad and battered wife who set their kids up for failure' type family and I feel bad for all 3 kids, even if their bio boys have little chance to ever leave their footsteps.

quaritch never hurt his boy, never threatened him or tried to cause him harm (genuinely, he may have quipped threats at him, but as far as we saw, he never meant them). he protected spider and valued him. he may not have been great, but he's much better by impression alone then the McCoskers.

[deadcactuswalking]

REVIEWING THE CHARTS: EUROVISION SPECIAL 2024 (18/05/2024) - also feat. Post Malone/Morgan Wallen, Myles Smith, Gunna and... Macklemore?

For the third week on the UK Singles Chart, Sabrina Carpenter reigns at the top with “Espresso”, and it’s the one week where my two main interests of pop music and geopolitics combine: the Eurovision final. Welcome back to REVIEWING THE CHARTS!

content warning: Israel-Palestine conflict, sex, language, Morgan Wallen

Rundown

As always, we start with our notable dropouts, songs exiting the UK Top 75 - which is what I cover - after five weeks in the region or a peak in the top 40 and this week, we bid farewell to… “These Walls” by Dua Lipa? Already? Yikes. Aside from that, we can bid adieu to “Feel It” by d4vd, “Outside of Love” by Becky Hill, “Type Shit” by Future, Metro Boomin, Travis Scott and Playboi Carti, “Worth It.” by RAYE, “Training Season” by Dua Lipa, “Thank You (Not So Bad)” by Dimitri Vegas & Like Mike, Tiesto, Dido and W&W, “Whatever” by Kygo and Ava Max, “Back on 74” by Jungle, and of course, “Mr. Brightside” by The Killers. Honestly, not much I can complain about, and I’d predict some of it ends up coming back anyway.

As for our gains, we see some notable boosts for “The Door” by Teddy Swims at #58, “Love Me JeJe” by Tems at #45, “As it Was” by Harry Styles at #33 (yep, it’s still around), “Saturn” by SZA at #32 and “Slow it Down” by Benson Boone at #16. Sure, that doesn’t seem like a lot, but this is quite a busy week so naturally, the gains are minimal, and there are no returns, but a bunch of new songs.

And in our top five this week on the UK Singles Chart, we have “Too Sweet” by Hozier at #5, Shaboozey at #4 with “A Bar Song (Tipsy)”, Tommy Richman shooting up to #3 with “MILLION DOLLAR BABY”, and a star-studded debut right at #2, with Post Malone and Morgan Wallen on “I Had Some Help”. “Espresso” of course is at #1 but more on Post and Morgan later… for now, let’s discuss the biggest night of the year when it comes to gay people representing war criminals in a competition to see who wrote and performed the better track: the Eurovision Song Contest.

Eurovision Song Contest 2024

Naturally, I end up talking about this every year, and this Eurovision was particularly controversial - at least amongst the very online, though very much also amongst the Eurovision fans who have protested some rulings by the European Broadcasting Union and their chairman in relation to the participation of Israel amidst the ongoing invasion of Gaza, as well as the disqualification of the Dutch participant for being aggressive towards a camerawoman, allegedly, though apparently there wasn’t any violence, he didn’t want to be filmed - it’s a bit of hearsay involved. I’m not here to discuss that though, I’m not a gossip blog - even if that last episode about the Kendrick-Drake beef might have teetered on it. Instead, I’ll focus on the music presented this year at Malmo, Sweden, and its impact on the UK charts, which remains relatively uncontroversial. Our entry, “Dizzy” by Olly Alexander of Years & Years, returns to #48 after peaking at #42 earlier this year - kind of embarrassing it couldn’t land in the top 40, especially since there are several other Eurovision songs in that region - though not many - this very week. A muted Eurovision year for sure when it comes to its tangible impact on the charts, but also just a messy overall Eurovision year, here’s me ignoring the vast majority of that and telling you all these songs kind of sucked.

#67 - “Doomsday Blue” - Bambie Thug

REPRESENTING: Ireland

Ireland sent a non-binary witch to Eurovision. If that isn’t woke going too far, I don’t know what it is. Jokes aside, it was a very theatric performance that gained traction simply for being weird, out there, extraordinary and camp, as well as having a soundtrack that, to many people I’m sure, was listenable. The performance, the staging, the camera work, it was all amazing. This alt-metal joint produced by Tylr Rydyr fell into what many heavier acts do at Eurovision: try and fit everything in the short time they have allocated. Norway fantastically avoided this by making a slower and more dramatic, maybe even epic, track but that cost them any chance of winning so from Ireland - and Croatia, we’ll get to it - we have some vaguely industrial mess and yes, I know the dynamic shifting between the two “modes” is most of the point, but I’m sorry, I just can’t stand this. It’s not a good metal song because it fails to reach any catharsis in its refusal to progress upon itself, and it’s not a good pop song simply because it refuses to construct itself as such. It’s not awful, at least by an objective standpoint, but apart from a pretty solid bridge where Mx. Thug devolves into the screeching noise of the outro, the song just teeters into different ideas without gaining a tight grip on any of them, and it’s probably a result more so of ESC limitations than Bambie Thug’s artistic intent, which makes it all the more frustrating.

#37 - “Europapa” - Joost

INTENDED TO REPRESENT: The Netherlands

My favourite Eurovision songs were Czechia, the Netherlands, Norway and Greece. Greece did okay, Norway… made the final at least, Czechia didn’t and the Netherlands were disqualified from performing. Just my luck, hey? Maybe I should stop making endorsements. Regardless, I still really like the Dutch entry, performed by Joost Klein and produced by Tantu Beats and Paul Elstak. It frames itself as a bit of a meme but it’s really one of the few entries that connects to the contest’s theme this year of uniting by music, narrating a story of an orphan travelling Europe getting the chance to prove himself, a story that has its origins in Joost himself losing his parents at a young age and now attempting to prove himself at Eurovision, which of course, sadly didn’t occur and makes the song even more bittersweet than it already was. There’s an even harsher dissonance at play, but outside of the context, it’s just an undeniable Eurodance jam. He even goes for the exact cheesy rap flow every Eurodance rent-a-rapper would use, and the nonsense chorus and vocal chop over the delightfully predictable happy hardcore pianos and synths are just a cherry on top, especially before it sprinkles into the messy instrumental outro. The fact that the lyrics are personal and cleverly written, with a reference to a Stromae song that is also about lacking a father figure, as well as a sample of a classic Dutch film, adds that little speck of intimate detail that makes a goofy song like this hit the right note. It’s fantastic, it’s a damn shame it couldn’t be performed at the final.

#36 - “Rim Tim Tagi Dim” - Baby Lasagna

REPRESENTING: Croatia

This one should be easy to ring off, because it is incredibly one-note. A self-produced Neue Deutsche Harte record from Croatia with goofy lyrics and an impassioned yet somewhat restricted performance that I feel is a bit tied up in the grinding, danceable nature of its unmoving instrumentation that it can’t have nearly as fun as it should. The chorus is a bit self-serious as well, and whilst tonal clash is definitely not stranger to Eurovision, and can be implemented well like with “Europapa”, it’s only when the goofiness comes as a direct result of the more serious backstory or they’re inseparable, and given this barely constructs a full song out of just repeating yourself, it feels half-baked.

#18 - “The Code” - Nemo

REPRESENTING: Switzerland

This one I don’t really like either, and I’ll admit that it’s purely because it’s not my favourite brand of camp: the operatic performance is bombastic and impressive, sure, but it just annoys me. The breathing especially from Nemo, it feels a bit much, if there is a limitation for that in Eurovision. I should mention, probably, that this is the winner for Eurovision this year, and Nemo is another non-binary individual from Switzerland, but they also rap so that’s like five woke points detracted. Their performance once again is impressive but comes from a very Disney-esque school of theatrics and I’ve never been able to relate too well to lyrics about triumphantly finding yourself, mostly because it’s a lot messier of a process than this streamlined breakbeat over soaring strings would have you believe. You would clearly be able to tell that Nemo is one of six producers (the others are Lasse Nymann, Benjamin Alasu, Tom Oehler, Wojciech Kostrzewa and NYLAN) and that’s far from a bad thing: it sounds epic. I absolutely understand why it won, it’s got the energy, the bombast, the straight-up talent, it’s just far from my thing. I think I just watch Eurovision for the politics and Graham Norton at this point, so the songs that’ll hit closer to home are those that try for subtlety, which we honestly didn’t get a lot of this year.

New Entries

#70 - “Miles on It” - Kane Brown and Marshmello

Produced by Digital Farm Animals, Earwulf, Connor McDonough and Marshmello

We really don’t have to do this, guys. If we’re going to actually import some country from Stateside, let’s stick to their biggest and brightest. I’ll take Luke Combs, I’ll take Morgan Wallen and I’ll take Zach Bryan and then some. Kane Brown making yet another half-hearted pop pivot - if you can even call it a pivot at this point - with a slowly fading Marshmello at the helm does not need to be included in the shipment. Given how many fully competent producers are here, I question what Melloboy even did, apart from maybe the grating, ugly processed guitar in the drop because that sounds straight out of his playbook. The snap intro sounds more like Loud Luxury’s “Body” than it does anything even resembling country and I don’t think the decidedly unsubtle lyrics from Kane Brown here as he elbows you asking if you know what it means, or the tropical house wank vaguely pretending to be in any way related to Nashville, is going to make for a fitting sex song separately, let alone together. I’m usually one that complains about songs being too short but this one loses steam a minute and a half in, and just ends up embarrassing for Kane Brown and… more of the same garbage for Marshmello. At least “Body Like a Back Road” had the kindness to keep it more relaxed.

#68 - “Take a Bite” - beabadoobee

Produced by Rick Rubin and Jacob Bugden

So this new beabadoobee song is about finding peace and comfort in toxic or negative situations that are simply the norm, feeling like you have to repeat behaviours that may be unhealthy or unwieldy, with an introspective chorus where she wonders why she’s stuck in that cycle, never truly finding an answer but she still wants to do it over and over again in spite of her ambitions. It’s a great conceit for a song that’s convincingly sold by beabadoobee’s constantly uncertain, softer tone often buried by the production, which is my main issue with this track: Rick Rubin’s on the boards, which means the dreamy gaze of these guitars doesn’t shine nearly as well as it should, and the overdubs feel a bit… random? It’s hard to describe, but despite the chaotic tone of the song, I think it would benefit from being more refined and less scrappy, primarily because that is an absolutely killer chorus even if, like much of the rest of the song, it’s pure worship of 90s and 2000s adult alternative. That’s a genre I miss being on the charts though, I love all that kind of stuff, so I’m fully happy with this being here. I wish there was either a poppier or crunchier sound to it - feels a bit weird lodged between the two extremes, and the fact the guitar doesn’t get to really roar in the bridge does bother me - but as a song, still fantastically written and infectious. Even if I doubt it’ll stick around, I hope more of this sound is coming, because if this is close to being great, I imagine what beabadoobee has left might just reach that.

#64 - “on one tonight” - Gunna

Produced by Kenny Stuntin and Nash Beats

We actually have two Gunna songs. His most recent album One of Wun debuted at #4 on the albums chart and took that week it was out to grow on me. I was initially very lukewarm on it but a few surprisingly impactful experiences with the album - namely, being sleep deprived and trying to use it force me to sleep - have allowed me to gain a respect for it. Sadly, my favourite tracks haven’t debuted, at least not in the top 75 - “hakuna matata” is in the top 100. What we do have still isn’t bad, and definitely contributes to the semi-motivational oceanic feeling of the record overall. In fact, I will say the album is better experienced as a whole due to the seamless tracklist sequencing and overall mood that carries on way more effectively when spread out across 20 tracks. Without each other, sole songs can definitely feel a bit empty, and this is absolutely a great example since it’s only one and a half minutes. Its watery Dirty South beat is slick, Gunna is surprisingly focused in his rags-to-riches story that involves a cute little melodic hook towards the end of his one verse, as well as some genuine lines about staying independent and keeping a relationship with God to stay motivated. It’s a real bite-size example of what I liked about the Gunna album, but not too impressive as a sole piece.

#55 - “one of wun” - Gunna

Produced by Kenny Stuntin, Byrd and ProdByQue

Yup, two consecutive Gunnas, and I hate to say it but it’s more of the same, as the title track is one of my least favourites here, mostly because it tries to be a “banger” with its unmoving, frankly quite dull trap beat and cheap percussion that falters when it comes to replicating the wavy atmosphere of much of the rest of the album. Gunna is still fun here declaring that he’s not a lil-bitty shrimp but I’ve never been anything but repulsed by his brand of sex bars, and they’re not exactly anything fancier here, so it’s just a bit of a dud. Sorry. Wish I could talk about some of my preferred tracks at length but I’ll just shout out my favourites, those being the opener “collage”, “whatsapp (wassam)”, “treesh”, “conscience”, “let it breathe” featuring Roddy Richh and the very genuine closer “be careful what you wish for”.

#51 - “HIND’S HALL” - Macklemore

Produced by Macklemore

I do feel pretty damn good about how the Israeli entry to Eurovision failed to chart but raising funds for the United Nations relief agency in Palestine can take Macklemore of all people nearly in the top 50 with a very non-commercial song. It may seem petty but hey, I’d rather be petty on the side of freedom, and I’ve been caring about Palestine’s independence long before the recent war in Gaza - you can check my coverage of Israeli Eurovision entries from even just last year - so part of me is really happy that this song exists and is charting. In fact, all of me is, and I’m surprised that Macklemore has taken such a public and assertive stance on this considering he’s mostly a comedic rapper, whose political statements I remember most being 1.) the time he wore an antisemitic costume because he thought he was Humpty Hump, and 2.) the time that he thought he was gay because he liked drawing. I’m hyperbolising those events, obviously, they’re both just mismanagements of genuinely good intentions, but that’s kind of been what Macklemore is defined by, at least to me, and “HIND’S HALL” is a much more focused attempt at expressing those feelings in a cohesive way. I still don’t like it.

The idea to sample a respected Lebanese Arab singer is clever, but the beat is droning and aggressive in a very old-school rap way, which means it can get on the nerves easily if the guy over it is struggling to keep compelling - see Eminem’s “Mosh”. I agree with the vast majority of what Macklemore says about white supremacy and I absolutely agree that Palestine should be free - and I think he makes a very good point not many are doing in comparing Israel’s treatment of Gazans to police brutality in the USA, even if he doesn’t really expand on that, and makes it more about himself than it probably should be. That’s the main issue with this song for me, and it’s clear even in Macklemore’s delivery, which can be aggressive and gritty, clipping in the mix, but can also just sound goofy, especially in the intro where the rhyme schemes are a bit dragged out. Otherwise, whilst I have no problem with the vast majority of his lyrics, some nitpicks get to me in a way they wouldn’t if it weren’t for the unavoidable corniness of Macklemore and a song that teeters on obnoxious, mostly through the TikTok references, the idea that white supremacy wasn’t on blast until Macklemore made this song, the random Drake mention that feels attention-grabbing, the plea not to vote for Biden as if a good third party exists and the other option isn’t going to make Gaza worse and embolden white supremacy domestically, and most annoyingly for me, “You can pay off Meta, but you can’t pay off me!”… You’re fucking Macklemore! As much as I really don’t like the song, I do recommend it. Stream it, buy it, give the lyrics a read, there’s not much art being made about this in the public eye and even what we are being given is by imperfect allies (if there is such thing as a perfect ally), it should give us the opportunity to raise money and awareness by the suffering by those on the ground, corniness be damned. I have a lot of respect to Macklemore for trying this out and what he does, even if I don’t like it, is way more impactful than anything I could even try. It’s free Palestine until the colonisation and murder stops, and my hope is that eventually, it will, though the suffering faced in that excruciating timespan may not even balance the eventual freedom when so many who struggled won’t get to live a second of it.

#41 - “360” - Charli XCX

Produced by A.G. Cook and Cirkut

I think I’m supposed to know who, well, any of the women in this music video are. Regardless, it had a bit of a viral moment and helped propel Charli’s newest single from her upcoming Brat album to nearly reach the top 40. Here, the Eurodance keys are placed alongside a demanding electroclash beat that makes it sound a lot darker than they would in a more upbeat, party-friendly context, and this is really an example of A.G. Cook taking elements of electronic dance music and either blending them with different ideas or taking them so far out of context that they emit an entirely different idea than would be otherwise intended. It’s a brilliant idea, especially with the vaguely Jersey club percussion effects in the chorus and that weedy 2000s synths-- did she shout out Sewerlsvt? No? Okay, thank God. Uh, swiftly moving past that, I think this is a very effective way of balancing the carefree and paranoid elements of showbiz together into a relatively ugly yet still accessible and catchy, even hypnotic, tune with a cute little reference to her producer in the second verse and hooks out the wazoo. This is more lowkey perhaps than what the album’s title and cover would imply, but for me, its brattiness is much more charming than in “Von dutch”. Also, apparently there’s a remix with Robyn and Yung Lean coming which is insane and I desperately need to hear that.

#12 - “Stargazing” - Myles Smith

Produced by Peter Fenn

I had no idea who this guy was until just a few weeks earlier and now we’re giving him a free top 20 hit. Sure… man, we’re really back in 2013 pop, aren’t we? This doesn’t directly sample or interpolate anything, but it sure felt derivative and looking back towards a monogenre we ditched back in 2015. It mixes the stomp rock of that time with the dance-pop of that time in a blend that could potentially be interesting if this wasn’t just something that Avicii did back in the day, and by keeping the fake claps, anthemic choruses, ugly vocal processing and wooshing sound effects but not the commitment to electronic sounds, it ends up sounding less like an attempt to warp genres together like Avicii was doing and instead just a mangled attempt to manufacture a pop version of what Hozier and Noah Kahan are already doing to great success without dumbing themselves down. Also, the mix is just terrible, that lifeless yet still inexplicably propulsive kick drum frightens me. This’ll probably be a hit but God, it’s not deserving of it. Next.

#2 - “I Had Some Help” - Post Malone featuring Morgan Wallen

Produced by Charlie Handsome, Hoskins and Louis Bell

To anyone surprised that Post Malone is able to pull the streaming and radio numbers he has in the past week for this single… to quote a great post on the Pulse forums, “he had some help.” It’s not fair to say it’s all Morgan though - after all, he’s not a massive pull globally. The song has genuinely latched on pretty well and had an amazing couple first days, it could still stick around, and I honestly think that sometimes a song’s success can be explained pretty simply: it’s just good enough. There’s a lot you CAN hate about this, especially given Post Malone’s origins in rap that I’ve already seen start discourse about this single, and Morgan Wallen as a presence is always going to turn people off… but this is just a driving-down-main country pop-rock sing-a-long, and I feel that’s really difficult to mess up. The drums don’t sound that organic, even if they are - they could very well fit in a synthpop tune as well - but Post has never been one for organic instrumentation, more so an immersive blend between the acoustic guitars he’s familiar with and soundscapes that prefer synthbeds, strings and trap percussion, so this is considerably more organic for the guy, who warbles through the verses and pre-choruses that are probably about a breakup but… does it matter? Once the drum fills into the undeniable chorus that really only has one flaw in that it might be too wordy, but is otherwise an anthemic ode to teamwork more than anything else, I could not care less about what the song is actually about. The fiddle that backs Morgan Wallen is a nice touch, even if a bit on-the-nose that designate that he’s the country singer on the track, and the chorus sounds perfectly written based on both artists’ catalogue. I can see right through this in terms of it being a slight reinvention of Post’s image, a clear attempt at being a surefire hit, but the song backing it all up has too much genuine chemistry and is way too well constructed for that opaqueness to ever get to me. Especially with that chorus, God, it’s a great chorus.

Conclusion

Best of the Week goes to Joost here for “Europapa”, with Charli XCX grabbing the Honourable Mention for “360” though, again, those Post Malone and beabadoobee songs are pretty damn good. As for the worst, it should be pretty damn clear which two tracks are there, but it’s a toss-up to who gets what. I think Kane Brown and Marshmello get Worst of the Week on the pure egregiousness of “Miles on It”, but Myles Smith’s “Stargazing” might just sound worse and takes the Dishonourable Mention. That was a heavy few weeks but hopefully things will calm down, for now - thank you for reading, rest in peace to Steve Albini, free Palestine and I’ll see you next week!

[wishywashypunmpkinsauce]

The Berry Nice Beachday

Summary: The young ancients arrive in the Hollyberry Kingdom for a beach day!

Type: Fluff

(Excuse any spelling errors)

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The glorious morning sun beamed over the secluded Hollyberry kingdom. Its bright rays shone through the curtains of the forest’s dense thickets and into the windows of the last sleeping cookies. The majority of the kingdom has well and truly risen much before the sun, seeming to find it best to begin their days early to get more done. This is most likely why the Hollybery kingdom had the most export and supplies of all kingdoms. Added it was a chipper kingdom with vast resources, loving, caring, and hard-working cookies as well as a Queen who served them with as much love as they served her.

Currently, the final carriage arrived in the blessed jungle kingdom. Pure Vanilla cautiously found his footing as he stepped down from the carriage, thanking the driver as a few Hollyberrian guards moved the driver and steed to a different area. The young vanillian king turned, fixing his hat, and made his way into the main grounds of the monumental-sized castle. There were no large steeples or multi-colored sugar glass panes, no quiet mummer of calm voices as one wafting through the air. But maybe that’s why Pure Vanilla likes being at the Hollyberry kingdom so much, because it was so obscure to his own ruling that he found so much joy in exploring this unique kingdom. He looked up upon the large, pink-domed building, listening to the loud calls of Hollyberriens, and the soft drowning of babbling brooks. The study breeze that swayed his neatened bangs.

____________________

 “My dear beloveds, I am thrilled you could all arrive!”

The pink-haired queen marched into to open-air, summer ballroom. Making her presence well known as her shoes hit the cool white tiles. Smiling giddily as she hurried to greet the others. She wore pink bathers with white and yellow accents adorning the edges, showing off her strong, sturdy figure. A silky purple, transparent shawl lay over her shoulders. A wide-brimmed, pie-lined hat, fastened with a pink ribbon on her head. Her taffy-coloured hair was in a beautiful braid that reached the middle of her back, leaves, and ribbons decorating the creases. In her arms, was an 8-month-old RoyalBerry. The child already had a full head of silky pink hair which curled out from under his hat. Chubby arms waved about eagerly as he batted about a dragon stuffy. The child wore a pink and white stripy swimsuit which was a size bigger than him, but adorable none of the less. His wide babbling smile squished his cheeks and made him squint with joy. He let out more baby gurgles before mindlessly hiding his face in his mother’s brawn.

The four arriving ancients hurried to hug the plus-sized woman, once reaching the mid-point the 5 mushed together in a tight grasp. Letting out a string of greetings as soft kisses were given to the pink queen. Then finally, all attention was on the most important child ever to bless their lives. Little baby RoyalBerry, the pride of the Hollyberry kingdom, the firstborn son to the beautiful Hollyberry, and the cutest little baby to ever be born. The pink-haired babe gurgled with joy as he was passed from ancient to ancient, each giving soft forehead kisses to the child.

Golden Cheese, White Lily, and Pure vanilla squabbled over who got to hold the sweet baby, Golden Cheese used her ability of flight to her advantage, pocking her tongue out to the duo below. Going on about how much smarter she was than the pair, that was before she got zapped in the ass and squawked in surprise and pain. White Lily chortled with laughter, casting another spell to snatch the pink-haired babe.

Dark Cacao made his way over to the pink-haired, resting a gloved hand on her shoulder.

“HollyBerry dear, how have you been fairing?” he asked, pulling the pinkette into another tight squeeze. In return she leaned her weight on the other, allowing the purple king to hold her in his arms. Her body thanked the king for the moment of relaxation. Having only just experienced 9 months of carrying her babe was a lot, but even after Royalberry’s birth, she was still on her feet. The pink queen wasn’t complaining though, it was her choice to bear a child, and this was just a part of the process. That’s not to say there were moments where she flat out would pass out from exhaustion.

“Oh I have been as well as I can get in times like these, a little tired, a little sore, but I will be fine” She smiled into his chest, moving her arms the sit just on his waist. Hollyberry moved away and started to lift the large metal crest that the man carried on his shoulders. Lifting the cape off of him to remove the weight and to try to cool him down. Being from the snowy planes of the northern ridges, Cacao didn’t do well in the Hollyberry kingdom’s hot humid heats. But even though he began to melt in the blistering summer rays, he still made time to visit Hollyberry no matter the season. His face was hot and bothered and Hollyberry could see the sweat roll down his forehead. She carfuly slipped away the layer of armour and fabric, the stoic king did not once resit. Normal he would protest on how he would rather die than remove such an important image, but the kings anger seemed dormant. Instead, he leaned into the surprisingly cold hands of the woman. Giving a slight smile once the weight and heat were removed from his body.  

Hollyberry stopped once she removed his gloves, assuming this was enough to keep him cool until the Queen got him into some bathers. Because there was no way in witches, she was going to let him sit under an umbrella and not step a foot into the water. If she had to; she would throw him in! He thanked her as he pressed another kiss to her forehead and right on time, the other 3 ancients returned with the baby. Lily having won the battle of the babe, squishing his chubby cheeks lightly and booping his nose.

“All right you sweaty bastards, let’s get you lot into sometime cooler and go swimming!” The Queen struck a sassy pose, looking at the others with stars in her eyes. The group only jittered with excitement as they followed the other through the long halls of the Hollyberry palace. The group finally ended up in the Queen mothers bedroom. Hollyberry made her way over to the walk-in closet and disappeared while the others waited for her return. Golden cheese snatched RoyalBerry from White Lilys grasp and toppled over onto the huge, marshmallow-like bed. The young prince giggled loud in response.

Pure Vanilla leaped onto the bed, struggling a bit to fight the waves of blankets that fought him off. Eventually, he made it to where Golden Cheese and White Lily had been engulfed by the large, pink covers. RoyalBerry was gurgling slightly, drool running down his cheek as he gawked at the three olders. The blonde haired king moved the place a delicate hand on the babe, running soft circles into Royalberry’s back.

Cacao then appeared from the sea of red and gave a soft smile, running an exposed hand over the sheets and to the happy baby. Royalberry slapped the chocolate king’s hand a few times before latching on and drooling over them. Chewing on the calloused fingers with not a thought in the world. A soft smile appeared on the stoics kings face, a kind of face that yeared the love of this baby. “He’s still got the baby fever ay!” Golden cheese remarked as she sniggered under her breath. The chocolate king snapped his head towards the avian queen with a very unimpressed look on his face. The kind of look you gave to an idiot who told you Earthbread was actually in the shape of a cookie, just more dramatized. But in Dark Cacaos’ eyes, he was looking at an idiot so the reason behind the look was supported. “Oh shut your yapper you glittery penguin” He snapped jokingly, grasping the pink haired baby, and pulling him into his lap. Earning whines from the others to return the babe to the middle.

The group stayed on the bed until the queen reappeared from the depth of the closet, multiple pairs of bathers folded in her arms.

“Now I got these custom-made, so they keep you comfy but cool” The Queen started, making her way towards the bed, and sitting down beside Golden cheese. Giving the avian queen a peck on the head. The golden-haired snapped up and grabbed the set of bathers clearly meant for her. Leaping off the bed and changing right there. The other 3 happily scooched over (pure vanilla and white Lily having to fight their way out of the bed sheets again) the queen handed them their respected bathers before they too went to change.

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“Woo Petals! Looking mighty nice there” Golden Cheese squawked from where she was. White Lily in return, threw her staff directly at avian queens face, bonking her right in the nose.

“And these bathers are super comfy, I might as well trade up my clothes for these” The golden-haired complimented the berry queen, leaping up and pressing a tender kiss against the other woman’s temples.

Golden Cheese had a simple top and bottom. Quite similar to her usual clothing but made from a strange but extremely comfy and waterproof material only made in the Hollyberry kingdom. As no other kingdom really went swimming let alone on a daily basis. The top was white in colour but with teal accents adorning the ruffles and sleeves. The bottoms were yellow and white, pant/skirt-like things. 

White Lily had a full-body suit with a skirt-like fabric over the pants. It was a stripy green and white outfit with sleeves that reach her elbows. White Lily was content with the bathers, finding them extremely comfy.

Pure Vanilla and Dark Cacao would have the same outfit if it weren't for the colour and a few minor things. Such as Pure Vanilla having a blue and white stripy set of baths

___________________________

The water was beautiful. Perfect temperature for a swim. Hollyberry raced down a side pier to a spot in the water she knew was deep and cannonballed in. She hit the bottom and felt around the sand before pushing her legs up and shooting up to the surface again. Splashing the group with water as she came up. They made it to the sandy shores where a picnic-like area had already been up. The berry queen hauled herself from the water, snorting some water out of her nose and sitting on the damper parts of the sand. Getting comfy under the suns bright rays. Pure Vanilla was the first to win the running race between him a golden cheese by some miraculous chance. Dark Cacao and White Lily came up behind the two as they squabbled. Dark Cacao still hot and bothered purfulously sweating but seemed better than he was before. White Lily was holding Royal Berry as the she quietly spoke in babble towards the baby. The two came down to sit under the shade of the umbrella.

The pinkette took a deep breath of fresh air.

“Royalberry’s first swim and I have this moment to share with my beloveds,” The queen thought happily. Taking pleasure from the warmth of the sun kissing her paled skin. She frowned at how pale she had gotten over the year, being away from the sun for some time did horrors to her skin tone. Her usually golden brown was somewhat more almond in colour, much paler than she liked. So today was a great day to regain her colours.

The queen was soon toppled out of her thoughts are three figures bombarded her. Dragging her into the water, laughing while doing so. She dived under the cool surface and escaped her offenders. Hollyberry surfaced, seeing Golden Cheese and White Lily in the middle of a water battle, poor pure Vanilla being caught right in the center with no means of defense. Hollyberry looked over to the beach again, Dark Cacao was under the shade, babe in hands. Completely smitten with the small creature.

The mother smiled warmly as she exited the water again and made it up towards the Cacao king. Curling up next to him as she stroked her son’s soft hair. 

“You know Cacao, today will be Royalberry’s first time in the lagoon” She smiled warmly as she ran her other hand over Dark Cacao’s back before running her fingers through the onyx hair. The Cacaoin king turned his eyes down to the woman, a look of surprise present.

“Would you like to take him into the water Cacao?” She asked politely, playing with the strands of hair mindlessly. Watching over both her son on Dark Cacao with steady eyes.

“I would love to” He began nervously “but...” He trailed off, looking down into the water where the other three were still play fighting. Golden Cheese and White Lily now ganging up on Pure Vanilla as the blond struggled to dive to the safety under the water. 

“But what?” Hollyberry asked, sitting up to face the other.

“What if I hurt him? What if I’m not careful and something happens to him!? What if-” Hollyberry pressed her finger to his lip which quietened the frantic king.

“But nothing, there is nothing you can do to hurt Royalberry, plus if you truly feel this scared, I will be right by your side the entire time!” She gave a warm smile which seemed to calm Dark Cacao down.

“Are you sure you don’t want to” He asked, Holly berry only chuckled.

“Dark Cacao cookie, Royalberry has had a lot of firsts. I want you to be the one with him when he has his first swim.” She placed her hands on his, then Royalberry slapped his hands down as well. Gurgling lights, speaking to himself.

“But aaaaaaah” He started up again, stuttering as he tried to think of an excuse for why he would be the worst candidate for the job.

“Wouldn’t Golden Cheese want to have the honors?” 

“Goli’s had her first, she got to have his first flight. Lily got to have his first crawl and nilla got his first laugh.” She rebutted with a smile.

“But if you don’t too, I can always make the others fight for the honor” She gave another cheeky grin, standing up and giving him a peck on the lips. That seemed to persuade the stoic king enough to make his way toward the water.

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Got a little lazy towards the end but eh, i hope you like it:)

Don’t use my work my work as your own, I will find you and destroy you.

Like/comment, reblog

Have a good day:)

[pluck-heartstrings]

Here I be, tainting you're robot fic tumblr with *other* robot fic because I can not understate that even if I'm not sure where it stands, Behavioral Patterns would easily be in my top ten list of top fave fics of all time. I forgot how much it absolutely consumes me. I've got this internal image of all this rumbling and crooning probably looks normal to Shrike's robot brain but sounds like a chainsaw with autotune to a human. Shrike crying is just dialup screams as their sub programs try to connect to guardianship programming manually. The blankets look and feel soft to them but its straight up chainmaiI. think about Optimus being the only crazy one in the room for once because the Matrix can not handle parental protocols and has him running at 1000% caveman efficiency and how like, Bots who arent organic life fans are looking at the Human happy autobots treating human kids a lot like they do sparklings (looking at you optimus and your preteen sidekicks) and on top of a big old piece of "dredges of cultural ptsd from the quintessons" the Autobots probably look like those folks who are fighting with their parents over "treating their grandchildren right" and said grandkid it's a mostly hairless and toothless chihuahua. Like activating guardianship protocols over shortlived ugly little organic creatures probably isnt a great look.

I screamed when Megateon first showed up. I'm a Prime and Beastwars baby with a smidge of Bumblebee movie but I love me a complex megatron and I had no idea what Earthpark Megatron is like. BIG SOFT UNCLE! I love throwing Shrike at the Prime verse decepticons. A bunch of big eyed, freaked out, hackles raised giants who dont dare to move because they might hurt the tiny little thing using them all as a jungle gym and sounds like a wind chime their armour is so thin

Knockout: children are disgusting. You are disgusting. Come let me polish you in protest

Shrike with a grinch grin who is a little shit: new pranking favorite

Soundwave: hold up I got kid experience with my gestalts and stay inside all day they should stay with me

Shrike: New Pranking fave

Megatron: just keep the pathetic weak little thing out of my (vastley uncomfortable with this) sights and away from like, dangerous shit. But dont let it leave I wanna rub this in Optimus' face

Shrike: LEMME HELP OR NEW PRANKING FAVE

Miko: hey what's your problem with autobots? They rule and decepticons drool

Shrike: (vents about Optimus and lack of freedom)

Miko: hold up. (Busts through Autobot base door holding a wrench) "HEY! EVERYSINGLE ONE OF YOU! COME GET YOUR LUMPS ALSO WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?"

I think about the future and if Shrike ever gets siblings. I think about them being spoiled rotton and becoming just the most conceited, egomaniac but still not as bad as Starscream. They are the "but I'm baby" meme in metal flesh. I think about millennia down the road, cities rebuilt and the last vestiges of neutral parties coaxed home. Maybe they are suprised afterall in hidden seekers in the stars. And a Shrike the little royal baby in the crystal city.

I think about that big dumb medic being big dumb and far, far to old for kids finally giving Shrike cousins. I think about Elita one definitly being the favorite auntie and it driving Starscream up the wall.

I think about what would have happened if Thundercracker had noticed them a few moments later in the battle and they had gotten to the hatch? Thundercracker trying to coax them out as the world explodes around them. Maybe the trine and kid dont make it to the ship at all and are stuck on and hunted down on earth?

I think about what if Shrike's brain had decided to wipe their human memories from the start to avoid trauma (only to trickle in as the get more comfortable as a mystery)? No doubt their relationship with Rachet would be better, and their thoughts about Prime not as strong, but the clashing personalities and field resonance would doubtless still drive them away, even if the pull to the Trine is a little less overwhelmingly onesided. More open eyed wonder and less "sounds fake but cool" in response to things.

Or maybe a world where their origional room didnt blow up? In either case they are situated with Ratchet but are drawn to the explicitly forbidden from Trine. Shrike with no memories getting to have some interactions with humans before they leave earth because *noone* knows they used to human and optimus is showing them off at a top secret level like "look at my child. Please do not interfere with our departure anymore because if the transformer masses find out we can successfully make sparklings on earth we are all going to have a bad time explaining why we cant just wipe out the comparatively juvenile and underdeveloped organics to make earth into a nursery BUT LOOK ITS A NEWBORN" (earth scientist frantically writing "does the robots have a puss puss?" In his notes) " "ok but your newborns are our size, built like a shit brickhouse, move like a chuckie cheese horror movie animatronic, and TALK" (Rachet crying) "I havent held a neonate in millennia I need you humans to understand how new they are" "you're neonates TALK... and are making some very worrying references and turns of phrases" "GOOCHIEGOOCHIEGOO"

(Shrike is less than impressed)

Shrike being much more Attached to Rachet even if by Virtue of Rachet "being warmer than cold" and maybe even not being in the carriers when the battle happens but with him. (Maybe Ratchet actually realizes something is wrong since he doesnt blame the off frequencies on previously being human and doubles down on the defensiveness and worry. Optimus being in full blown denial over the flight sickness because *there can't be something wrong with the brandnew sparkling* its freshly forged. The emberstone can not make defective sparklings. Its beyond his ability to cope with) Shrike being blandly apathetic at best with their situation. Minor Autobot infighting as they all throw their hats into the guardianship ring despite Ratchet's claim. Rachet keeps trying to like, just a tiny bit passively engage the parental imprinting program but keeps being subconsciously rejected by Shrike and the series of tiny heartbreaks that causes. Shrike getting colder and more listless and duller by the day. They dont gain any colors and become less willing to engage. The Trine's plan works and they end up on ship and the autobots doing everything they can to let them *never* find out Shrike exists. Shrike finds out about them anyways and goes to explore and spends ever damn second they can scrape together alone sneaking off to bond with the Trine. DO YOU SEE HOW MUCH THIS FIC CONSUMES ME! IM FANTASIZING AU HERE

I think about G.H.O.S.T. *a lot*

I think about how they'de probably use "have overly developed and independent offspring that thrive quickley* as an excuse to categorize Transformers a life form more in line with rodents than sentice for their own gain, and that one person that might actually be touched beyond the racism seeing the care and love and obvious affection and go "but their offspring are very slow to grow and spend most of their time in intellectual pursuits and their behaviours are ticking a lot of sentient species boxes and also um they have kids, which is not a thing we thought they did in our "they are just computers and thus tools to be used" agenda?

my grimdark ass is hella focusing on G.H.O.S.T. and like, inherent tragedies they bring. And the universal need from a fandom nerd to make characters suffer. Shrike being small enough to hide in one of the Trine (probably starscream's if ghost is involved) armour if he got captured. Moving around to avoid detection like a tiny scared koala bear. *screams into pillow*

I reread and redux this fic to *death* do you know that?

Nelly I shared this with my beta and it promoted a full-blown discussion about Behavioural and our favorite parts, it means so much to me that you've read both. Behavioural was me finding my voice in writing and becoming comfortable with writing regularly. I shouldn't have been able to write PMH without Behavioural.

Now if you'll exist me I have to print out this all and read it a thousand more times

[harpyreborn]

THE ISLES OF VER AETERNUM

The main island - Ver Aeternum

The island cluster where Phenexis Hails is known as Ver Aeternum. In English, it translates as the island of Eternal Spring. The Main Island (Ver Aeternum) is a large volcanic island with many coves and caves, a jungle as well as numerous species of plants and animals. As the name implies, the climate is always warm and sunny, and everything is always in bloom.

This island is the home to what used to be a small population of ship wreck survivors. Starting out as five families who were crossing the Sea. But as the years have gone on, it has grown due to new shipwrecks and the numerous births of new babies. The humans of this island live on one side, while the other Is used exclusively by the seemingly all powerful spirits of nature the islanders have come to call "Gods" and those of one of the five founding families that have the honor of Godly barrier protection duty.

But as the population steadily grew, the need for more resources for both humans and spirit/God's grew too. So, to answer this problem, the Spirits used the power they had accumulated to create a myriad of new Islands for their and their humans uses.

The isles

Small islands on either side of the main island which share its warm climate.

Phoenix isle. 

Small island off the Godside of the mainland given to phenexis for her own purposes. She uses it as a meeting place for her family on her non native mothers side, since they arent allowed on the main island because of their rules. So this island since It's under her domain as a demigoddess means she can do as she likes with it. 

So she's built a house, a garden, ziplines, tree houses and other fun things on the island for her family to do when they come to visit. 

Phenexis eventually starts to loan it out to the other islanders who have off island family so long as they treat it with as much respect or more as they do the main island.

Isle Fundus

This island is used to grow the plants that are turned into the materials used on the Islands: clothes, paper, ink, building equipment, boating equipment, medical equipment, and so on.

THE SKISLES (pronounced sk-eye-ls)

The skiles float above the main island and have a slightly cooler and windier climate than the main island.

Skiles Ruach (pronounced roo-ach)

The skile of Ruach: Ruach being Hebrew for Spirit, is Home to those of the Spirits/God's that can fly. Phenexia and Ventasmus are it's only divine inhabitants. Though Phenexis being daughter to Phenexia is allowed to live and visit should she wish. This isle floats above the gods side of the main island.

Skisles - Fundus

The skisle of Fundus: Fundus, being Latin for Farm, is just that! An animal farm! This isle floats above the Human side of the Island and It's entirely comprised of plants and animals largely untouched by the Islands human inhabitants. They only interact through observation or the rare times when giving medical aid is necessary. They make sure the island is well maintained and the animals have all they need to florish in a natural and healthy environment but with as little human interaction as possible.

THE SUNKEN ISLES

Sunken Isles - Ruach

The sunken isle of Ruach: Ruach being Hebrew for Spirit, is Home to those of the Spirits/God's that can swim: Arenis, Belladonis and Chardona are it's only divine inhabitants. This isle floats below the gods side of the main island.

Sunken Isles - Fundus

The sunken isle of Fundus: Fundus, being Latin for Farm, is just that! A food and medicinal farm! This island is used to grow all food and medicinally related crops. The Climate is like a greenhouse. Tropical. Warm. Wet. Perfect for growing! All of the crops are fertilized by mulch made with the discarded parts of the harvested crops on all the islands as well as poop from the herbavoires and the bits and bobs of the sea life that's caught on the main island! This mulch is then spread between all the islands for home gardens and general health of the wild flora.

[page-2-ids]

New Coining Event!

Hello and welcome to Synth’s Coining Rockin’ Event (or the “cre coining event” for the sane), a coining event entirely centered around rock music! Everything from J-Rock, to grunge, to hair metal! Any and everyone is welcome to participate! The event is going to last from May 1st to June 15! 

There aren’t really any rules, just some stuff I’d like to say before we get to the prompts. Every day of the event has two prompts, in theory the first one is a more known song and the second less known and also similar/linked in some way, but I don’t know how good of a job I did at that. It’s totally cool to do both prompts or just one, going off actual relation, vibes, whatever works! I’d like to ask that no one does genders just related to the listed song or songs/albums, just so we can avoid recoinings, but everything else is up for grabs!

Everyone is free to do all days, just a couple, multiple prompts a day, whatever floats your boat!

If anyone is interested in some tags they could use to organize or find terms, I have some of those under the cut. With all that out of the way, here are the prompts!

May 1st: November Rain (Guns N’ Roses) // (Don’t Fear) The Reaper (Blue Oyster Cult) May 2nd: Smells Like Teen Spirit (Nirvana) // Slither (Velvet Revolver) May 3rd: Dream On (Aerosmith) // Knockin’ On Heaven’s Door (any version) May 4th: Girls, Girls, Girls (Motley Crue) // Talk Dirty To Me (Poison) May 5th: Welcome to the Jungle (Guns N’ Roses) // Nightrain (Guns N’ Roses) May 6th: Every Rose Has Its Thorn (Poison) // Snuff (Slipknot) May 7th: I Don’t Want To Miss A Thing (Aerosmith) // I’d Die For You (Bon Jovi) May 8th: Livin’ On A Prayer (Bon Jovi) // Viva la Gloria! (Green Day) May 9th: You Give Love A Bad Name (Bon Jovi) // Shot Through The Heart (Bon Jovi) May 10th: Slippery When Wet (Bon Jovi) // 7800° Degrees Fahrenheit (Bon Jovi) May 11th: Dr. Feelgood (Motley Crue) // London Calling (The Clash) May 12th: American Idiot (Green Day) // 21st Century Breakdown (Green Day) May 13th: The Black Parade (My Chemical Romance) // Danger Days: The True Lives Of the Fabulous Killjoys (My Chemical Romance) May 14th: Comfortably Numb (Pink Floyd) // Give Me Novacaine (Green Day) May 15th: Numb (Linkin Park) // Shadow On the Sun (Audioslave) May 16th: Are We the Waiting (Green Day) // The Thin Ice (Pink Floyd) May 17th: Everlong (Foo Fighters) // She’s a Rebel (Green Day) May 18th: I Don’t Love You You (My Chemical Romance) // Don’t Cry (Guns N’ Roses) May 19th: Basketcase (Green Day) // Everyday is News (Shinsei Kamattechan) May 20th: Holiday (Green Day) // God Save the Queen (Sex Pistols) May 21st: Bohemian Rhapsody (Queen) // Homecoming (Green Day) May 22nd: Rock You Like a Hurricane (Scorpions) // Young Lust (Pink Floyd) May 23rd: Somebody Told Me (The Killers) // Michael (Franz Ferdinand) May 24th: The Sharpest Lives (My Chemical Romance) // Kickstart My Heart (Motley Crue) May 25th: In The End (Linkin Park) // Last Resort (Papa Roach) May 26th: Pour Some Sugar On Me (Def Leppard) // Cherry Pie (Warrant) May 27th: Here I Go Again (Whitesnake) // Street Of Dreams (Guns N’ Roses) May 28th: Should I Stay Or Should I Go (The Clash) // American Woman (Lenny Kravitz) May 29th: Shout At the Devil (Motley Crue) // The Hardest Part Is The Night (Bon Jovi) May 30th: Closer (Nine Inch Nails) // Wither (Tech N9ne, Corey Taylor) May 31st: I Love Rock N’ Roll (Joan Jett) // Mental Health(Bang Your Head) (Quiet Riot) June 1st: Master of Puppets (Metallica) // Under The Bridge (Red Hot Chili Peppers) June 2nd: Enter Sandman (Metallica) // Nightmare (Avenged Sevenfold) June 3rd: Toxicity (System Of A Down) // Carnivore (Body Count) June 4th: Nevermind (Nirvana) // Whatever (Adore Delano) June 5th: Sweet Child O’ Mine (Guns N’ Roses) // Born To Be My Baby (Bon Jovi) June 6th: Psychosocial (Slipknot) // Welcome to Horrorwood (Ice Nine Kills) June 7th: A Little Piece of Heaven (Avenged Sevenfold) // Enthrone (CHTHONIC) June 8th: Walk This Way (Aerosmith or Aerosmith, Run D.M.C.) // Bring The Noise (Public Enemy, Anthrax) June 9th: Rocket Man (Elton John) // Purple Haze (Jimi Hendrix) June 10th: Say It Ain’t So (Weezer) // Inside Out (Eve 6) June 11th: Letterbomb (Green Day) // Better (Guns N’ Roses) June 12th: I Write Sins Not Tragedies (Panic! At The Disco) // Sugar, We’re Goin’ Down (Fall Out Boy) June 13th: Combat Rock (The Clash) // Never Mind the Bollocks, Here’s the Sex Pistols (The Sex Pistols) June 14th: Runaway Train (Soul Asylum) // Patience (Guns N’ Roses) June 15th: Dust N’ Bones (Guns N’ Roses) // Homebound Train (Bon Jovi)

For anyone interested, here are the tags I’ll be using to organize genders related to certain bands. No one has to use them, but I thought someone would be interested and I’m bored! Also, all of these terms have already been coined, by me or someone else, that’s why not everything has a tag

Guns N’ Roses - #nrosesgender

Bon Jovi - #bonjender // #bonjovigender

Motley Crue - #cruegender

Green Day - #greendaygender

Slipknot - #slipknotgender

Poison - #poisoningender

My Chemical Romance - #mychemancegender

The Clash - #clashgender

The Sex Pistols - #sextolgender // #sextolsgender

Avenged Sevenfold - #sevenfoldgender

Shinsei Kamattechan - #kamattegender

Red Hot Chili Peppers - #rhcpgender

Metallica - #metallicagender

Nirvana - #nirvanagender

Body Count - #bodycountgender

Linkin Park - #linkinian

Aerosmith - #aerosmithgender

Velvet Revolver - #velvolvergender

Quiet Riot - #quiotgender // #rietgender

[capucapo]

(( continued from here. consider this an epilogue lollll. no dueling here, just a summary of it and then the aftermath. not super long !!! I promise!!

Seto Kaiba @blueeyesking , me as Noa, Mokuba, and the Yugis. Wyatt @seashaper , Hika @nameless-brand , and Pyre as Joey @redeyesandchilifries ))

[ Noa explains the Deck Master system, allows Seto to choose his and then shuffle. The rooftop arena falls away as volcanos rise from the void instead, an ocean of lava surrounding them, confining each Duelist to a small, stone platform as the cages containing their friends hang overhead

Noa also explains that he was born, that he was Created, weak and sickly. That Gouzaburo deemed him too frail to ever hope to run Kaiba Corp, had hidden him from the public eye out of shame.

As they Duel, that scenery changes with the cards that Noa plays. When he activates Giant Flood, a massive wave overtakes the field, washing away the lava as Noa babbles on about the Seven Days of Creation. A great ship rises from the tides, and Noa announces the arrival of his deck master, Shinato's Ark.

And Noa had vowed to prove his father wrong, to make him proud. He worked hard and studied hard and pushed himself hard to refute his place as heir.

From oceans to dense jungles and fields where dinosaurs roam, his Seven Turn prediction seems to liken the biblical legends to the more scientific phases of the Earth's natural history. Meteors rain from the sky, and the jungles freeze, ushering in the ice age.

So hard that his body finally gave out, just as Gouzaburo had finally seen some spark of potential in him.

As the ice age melts away to reveal lush, open fields of grass, Noa's confidence never wavers.

He explains the virtual system that his consciousness was transferred into. The virtual world that had been designed by the newly adopted heir of their company, as a final project of sorts to prove his own worth. A training simulator developed for the US Military, but Gouzaburo had found a different way to utilize its advanced technology.

The fields decay, turning to concrete below the Duelists' feet as Domino City rises up around them once more, Kaiba Corporation growing and towering behind Noa.

Noa explains that with his mind digitized, he was able to rapidly gain knowledge and information from both Gouzaburo's systems and the expanse of the internet. That he had run a million and a half simulations within his little world that showed how Kaiba Corporation could become the most powerful company on the planet-- it would only take a World War significantly reducing the planet's population! From there, he would rebuild as he alone saw fit. Ruling the new world as its God, as its Creator.*

Or its destroyer.

Even with all the assets that Seto had sunk into the ocean, Noa bets he could destroy the earth in, mmm 31 days.

He gets cocky though. For all his planning, for all of his deckmaster's ability to raise his lifepoints, to render the graveyards useless, Noa makes one tiny miscalculation.

He had anticipated Seto's Twin-Headed Thunder Dragon. After all, he'd summoned it against his own little brother. What he hadn't anticipated was the Dragon's Rage trap card, allowing Seto to inflict piercing damage with those hits. With nothing left in the graveyard, Noa suddenly finds himself losing control of the situation. But he puts his hand on his hip, smirking still as he looks up smugly through his thick eyelashes.

Until the second the attack hits, and his lifepoints drop to zero.

And finally, Noa's eyes go wide with the bitter realization.

He had hoped to use Mokuba at this exact moment. To summon up the baby brother at his beck and call, to stop Seto's attack in its place and buy him the time he needed to perfect his Creation strategy. But enraged by the betrayal, he had locked Mokuba up so tightly, even he would need to run the necessary processes to summon the teenage shield again. And even then, would it work?

That card's already been played.

Noa shakes with rage as his LifePoints hit zero. But his legs give way, as do the cages that hold the Kaibas' friends. He collapses to his knees, all his confidence and boasting shattered like glass ]

Rook

Rook didn't see the duel, or the shifting landscape around them. All they saw were the bars, the shouts of declared attacks drowned out by echoed screaming and burning pain. Shortly, they slide down the bars behind them to huddle on the floor of the cage, eyes fixed blankly on nothing as they sink into their helpless memories.

Seto takes the victory; the cage vanishes and Rook tumbles to the semi-real ground, the impact knocking them out of their trauma-trapped trance and making them gasp, hand reaching for their clasp again. The sorcerer blinks back into the moment at the seemingly positive outcome and shakily pulls to their feet, too dazed to taunt the villain and his loss, unfortunately, but looking around to make sure everyone is okay, or..at least not actively in danger, in Tristan's case.

Seto

Seto turns to see Mokuba's friends and Yugi's troupe fall, not even giving Noa the respect of facing him in his defeat. Noa knows the Kaiba family attitude toward Loss. He searches the sky for his brother, who surely also should have been released...

NOA

[ From where he kneels, broken, eyes wide in shock still, Noa begins to laugh. Some quiet, hollow, detached chuckle that builds and builds, until the fallen Kaiba is laughing hysterically, sitting back on his knees and head turned up to the sky. ]

Seto

Seto quickly snaps his attention back to Noa.

"What are you laughing at?!"

NOA

[ Noa's eyes fall to the side, staring at Seto with a manic smile, his head still thrown back.

"You might have beaten me... but... you still lose, Seto. You know what happens to losers in our family... But... there's only one way that I can truly die..... The countdown is already set. Do you really think... You can find Mokuba and a way out before this facility sinks? In only 25 minutes, Seto...?" ]

Seto

Seto's eyes narrow at Noa, and he bares his teeth, barely suppressing the urge to heel-stomp the blue-haired, arrogant child. He would be a child for the last 25 minutes of his life, and know he had lost... Seto doesn't need to stoop so low as to add true injury to this loss. But he still strongly considers it.

"Yes, I believe we can. You'll die here, Kaiba Noa- known by few, having left no mark on the world or your family's legacy. But we will live on and make it better than you could ever have dreamed... unless you had been anyone but Kaiba Gouzaburo's son."

Seto crosses the street to approach the Yugis, and stands calmly as their friends gather, before speaking.

"This boy doesn't have a creative script in his code; I'm certain he's keeping Mokuba in KC Tower still. Likely at the top, where he could force him to watch our Duel. Once we rescue Mokuba, he and I should be able to work with this old system to free us all, somehow; we'll work out the details when he's safe. Agreed?"

Yugi

Immediately upon being freed, the two Yugis had frantically occupied themselves with checking in on their friends. Yugi had gone to Rook, who had seemed especially distressed by the cages, and Levant and Téa who had landed nearby. While his Other Self had rushed to the side of Joey, Tristan, and Duke, where their cages had fallen on the opposide end of the arena.

But they both step away from the rest of their friends as Seto approaches, Yugi's sympathetic expression softening. The Other One gives him a respectful nod.*

"Agreed. I don't trust that Noa's out of tricks yet, we should all stay together and move quickly. Lead the way, Kaiba. The rest of us will support you however we can."

.

.

Mokuba

High above the scene below, somewhere in the towering Kaiba Corporation Headquarters, Mokuba sits alone on a concrete floor, in a dark stone dungeon. Chains restrict his wrists and ankles as he stares at the floor with an unfocused gaze.

He knows this prison. It's the same dark cell that Pegasus had trapped him in. But this time the iron cuffs fit a little too tightly, biting into his skin. The chains are a little too short, preventing him from moving more than a few inches, rather than the couple feet that Pegasus had granted him.

He had seen the Duel. Most of it, at least. Projected against the wall opposite where he sat in chains, Mokuba had watched, listened as Noa explained his origin to Seto.

When the video had first gone dark, it had filled the teenager with hope. Last he saw, Seto had made what he thought must be the final attack against Noa. He had cheered! But the metal cuffs didn't relent. Mokuba hadn't yet been freed.

And so all he could do was sit, and stare at the ground of his cell. Wondering, hoping, distressing, panicking. Accepting the worst.

Maybe Noa had won after all.

Maybe this is how he would die. Alone and cold, abandoned by both brothers and friends alike.

It's my fault, he thinks. It must be. If he were stronger, smarter, better. Maybe he wouldn't get kidnapped again. Seto must be so disappointed... If he's even still alive.

Mokuba wants to hug his knees to his chest, but the chains won't even give him that.

[ichiigotsukii]

RULES: repost, don’t reblog. just pick a muse of yours and fill it out.

MUSE: Taemin

— basics

▸ is your muse tall/short/average? 6’2″! 

▸ are they okay with their height? Honestly? He wouldn’t mind being even taller. But he’ll take what he has.

▸ what’s their hair like? Straight naturally. There is a bit of a wave to it depending on if he falls asleep with it still wet or damp (even though his trainer tells him not to).

▸ do they spend a lot of time on their hair/with their grooming? Definitely not. Any time he was in the media for an ad or something of that nature, a team did him up, but left to his own devices, it’s just running his fingers through it or using a comb.

▸ does your muse care about their appearance? He cares about his appearance more in working out and his muscle strength. In terms of clothing or something more in that vein, he lives in athletic wear so he definitely doesn’t care about being fashionable. Though! He is a little bit of a sneaker snob. If you’re wearing Converse, he WILL judge you.

▸ does your muse care about what others think about them? Again this is more as a competitor. He cares about his image in the MMA world, so having his name raked through the mud is something he won’t forgive, and he won’t stop until he destroys those who set him up. But in terms of if people don’t like him on a personal level? He doesn’t give a shit. He has a bit friendlier of a persona with media, but in all other aspects, he couldn’t care less.

— preferences

▸ indoors or outdoors? Outdoors ▸ rain or sunshine? Rain. ▸ forest or beach? Beach ▸ precious metals or gems? Precious metals ▸ flowers or perfumes? Uh....flowers if he has to choose ▸ personality or appearance? Strength....lol ▸ being alone or being in a crowd? Being alone ▸ order or anarchy? Order ▸ painful truths or white lies? Painful truth ▸ science or magic? Science ▸ peace or conflict? Conflict ▸ night or day? Day ▸ dusk or dawn? Dawn ▸ warmth or cold? Cold ▸ many acquaintances or a few close friends? A few close friends ▸ reading or playing a game? Playing a game

— questionnaire

▸ what are some of your muse’s bad habits? Brushing people off is a big one, especially when he’s offered help. Not learning how to cook even simple things. Leaving his dishes in the sink until they become a pile. Having one foot in the public eye while the other is in the darker underground. Getting his underwear dry cleaned.

▸ has your muse lost anyone close to them? how has it affected them? He lost his mother when he was 13 and it definitely made him more closed off and colder towards the world. She definitely babied him a little and was very warm with him, and after her passing, his father left him to do a lot of parenting of himself. His ironclad self discipline comes from being on his own a lot. It didn’t help that he can have a rather intense face, so making friends in school didn’t always come easy. He got in a lot of fights.

▸ what are some fond memories your muse has?

As much as he likes to bitch about some of the people in Jungle, Ozelot, it really is a found family for him. People depend on him, look up to him, and care about his well being, even when its tough love sometimes. 

▸ is it easy for your muse to kill? In terms of strength and ability? Definitely. But while fighting is his thing, and he gets riled up when there’s blood involved, he isn’t much into killing so he doesn’t. But he COULD.

▸ what’s it like when your muse breaks down? He....hasn’t really done that so it’s hard to say. If he really broke down then he there would probably be a flood of pent up feelings released, but he keeps those kinda of emotions under tight lock and key....that is then put in a box, locked up again, and thrown into an ocean where it can never be discovered. :) 

▸ is your muse capable of trusting someone with their life? Yes, he is NOW. Before Jungle, he definitely wasn’t. But now there is a select handful that he would trust his life to. 

▸ what’s your muse like when they’re in love? ............Secret. Softie. He’s a soft puppy on the inside when he’s alone with someone he loves. A bit of a shy boy. 

TAGGED BY: @ I did some of these awhile ago but I saw Kris bring it back so I nabbed it TAGGING: @ Anyone can say I tagged them! But I’m making @bottleofbabes​ do one for Darius! (And Dante if you don’t mind doing two)

[eukaryotesrool]

Antelope

Alrighty, I'd like y'all to imagine an antelope, envision it, NOW.

Good? Then continue.

(Antelope overload)

Did you imagine a hoofed animal? Perhaps in grassy Africa? Grazing? Perchance, like the charming fellows above?

Well, all of the above are antelope! So what is 'antelope'? A family? An order even? No, and no, though, its related to a family in that it is a collection of genuses, but it's what's called a wastebasket taxon.

An antelope must be part of the family bovidae and NOT be a goat, sheep, or other cattle, the EXACT rules are a touch shaky because, well, antelope is (I believe) a polyphyletic grouping, meaning the group neither posses the common ancestor of all members of the group (which would be paraphyletic) or the common ancestor AND all descendents of that ancestor (which would be monophyletic, which makes something a true clade).

But there's still some meaning to the word, 91 entire species of antelope roam Africa, India, Central Asia, the Middle East, and even a small part of Eastern Europe.

(Illustration from The History of Four-footed Beasts (1607))

In much of ye old Europe the antelope was strangely viewed as a mighty beast of prey, with horns of razor and the heart of a wolf.

(Coat of arms of the Dule of Abercorn)

This design was used largely for heraldry, and still sticks around today, I think it looks neat.

Now, lets go over specific antelope, I've chosen based on very good reasons.

Best scientific name

(A kob)

Some scientific names repeat themselves, such as Vulpes vulpes, those ones are easy to remember, some species names are used as a common name, such as Arcticitis binturong

Then you have...

THE KOBUS KOB, near perfection, the generic name is very similar to the species name, and the species name is also a major common name, tremendous bonus points because it sounds funny

Even more bonus points because there's a subspecies called the Kobus kob kob, perfection, no notes.

The littlest baby

(So cute, squeeeee!)

The royal antelope, known scientifically as Neotragus pygmaeous, it's one of a large (unlike them, hehe) number of 'dwarf antelope' but the royal antelope is the littlest among them.

Standing up to 10 inches (25 cm) tall and weighing in at (at the upper end) 6.6 lb (3 kg), that footlong hotdog you had for lunch is longer than this lad is tall!

(A wittle baby royal antelope)

Little is known about these jungle-dwelling cuties, they mysteriously wander hidden in foliage.

The weirdest

(Such a silly guy!)

The saiga (Saiga tatarica) I mean, just look at him! This antelope lives mostly in Russia, making it an oddity in geographic location too!

Their strange downward curved nose is mysterious, and seems to serve many purposes, keeping warm, filtering out dust they inhale, and, of course, an amazing sense of smell!

They even communicate with loud nasally roars!

The most antelope-y

(Such antelope, much cute)

Thomson's gazelle (Eudorcas thomaonii) will always be the masoct of antelopes, the true antelope, to me.

It's still exceptional though, the fourth fastest land animal, running up to 50-55 MPH (80-90 KM/H) cheetahs (the fastest land animal) are their main predator. They're also sometimes called tommies!

The biggest baby

(They tall)

The fittingly names giant eland (Taurotragus derbianus)!

Standing between 7.19 and 9.55 feet (219 and 291 cm) tall, females weighing between 660 and 1320 pounds (300 a and 600 kg) and the larger males weighing from 880 up to 2650 pounds (400 to 1200 kg)!

My Favorite!

Yes, that's the royal antelope, it was love at first sight, okay? They're perfect! The saiga and Thomson's gazelle are the runner ups.

The most threatened

Sadly, there are several terribly threatened antelope, the hirola, or Beatragis hunteri is the worst off, considered critically endangered by the IUCN, there is only two levels worse than that, extinct in the wild, and truly extinct.

Less than 500 remain, none in captivity. Neither humanity nor nature have been too kind to this critter, hunting, habitat loss, disease and more have devestated this poor creature, the lowered elephant population causes bush enchroachment, harming the hirola, giving a good show of the domino effect of extinction, but its not all bad.

August twelth is hirola day! Human's have begun manually trimming brush, to keep the habitat of the hirola (and other species) in place, if they did go extinct it'd be the first time a mammalian genus has gone extinct in mainland Africa in modern human history, lets try not to lose the record we have going.

I have hope.

Sadly, the saiga is, yet again, a runner up, it too is critically endangered, along with other antelopes.

[shadowfromthestarlight]

The best books push the boundaries of your imagination and challenge your notions of what is possible.

This is such a book.

I heard about it in a recent Lex Fridman interview with the author. The interview itself captivated me; even among adventurous types, what this young man has accomplished is exceptional. And since this book was published in 2014, he's done more. His life is so outside the box it makes you question why there's a box to begin with. A somewhat learning-disabled youth from New Jersey who never fit into traditional schooling drops out of high school to get his GED and start college early, stays at a remote research station in the Peruvian jungle learning everything he can about the Amazon rainforest in between semesters, devotes his life to conservation, catches anacondas, bonds with a baby anteater, marries a girl he met on a trip to India, and survives traveling alone into the deepest, darkest reaches of the unmarked, untrailed wilderness more than once... Everything about this guy is a giant "fuck you" to the rules.

I genuinely teared up throughout the book. The first part contains descriptions of the abundance of life in the rainforest that made me ask, multiple times, in complete seriousness, how there are people on this planet who don't believe in God. To learn what people have already destroyed in their ignorance of the interconnnectedness of the forest, how important every small species is to its functioning, is sobering. And yet the amount of wilderness that is still out there, and how much is undiscovered, or barely discovered, or still not understood by science, is mind-blowing.

Anyone interested in animals, forests, adventure, or just being inspired by someone who marches to the beat of his own drum, would love this book.