#lets pretend it's still October 31

[out-of-context-genshin]

trick or treat :3

trick >:3

[anmiruzu]

(anon who requested riddle for the event: i meant prompt 6. the trick-or-treating one. sorry.)

to skip and go trick-or-treating

a/n i like how in-character this would be for him especially since his mother was strict with him growing up so now let’s hope he’s in character (´･ω･`) …also i made this a little long oops

-472 words-

October second,

riddle rosehearts; prompt 06: “what do you mean you’ve never gone trick-or-treating before?!”

as someone from another world, you didn’t think that many of your holidays and traditions would be celebrated here, referring to halloween and many others. but what surprised you more was that there were actually people who did not go trick-or-treating when they were younger.

“what do you mean you’ve never gone trick-or-treating before?!” you exclaim loudly in shock not expecting this revelation.

“well, my mother had always told me that it was a worthless tradition and that candy and sweets in general are not good for my health-”

you interrupt him, “still! to never trick or treat? not even once?”

you never expected this but this was riddle, a hard worker who was strict on both himself and others. so it wasn’t too far-fetched of a story although if it was ace, you would’ve called bullshit on him.

“not even once” riddle repeats, shaking his head. 

you ponder for a moment in thought before speaking up again, “then let’s go trick-or-treating”

“we’re in college, y/n, furthermore, we, more specifically heartslabyul still have to prepare the botanical garden for halloween week.” (i know it’s more of a high school kind of setting considering their ages but it’s called night raven college so just pretend)

“so?”

“‘so?’ we still have our responsibilities! as the housewarden of heartslabyul, i cannot just leave my upper and underclassmen by themselves!” riddle retorts back quite passionately despite knowing deep down he wants to try trick-or-treating, just once, despite knowing he’s much too old for it. 

“hmm” you pause in thought once again, “then i’ll help you prepare; I did promise ace and deuce i’d help them… but… only if you skip the last day with me”

you reason with riddle wanting to show him what he missed out in his childhood.

“...thank you for your assistance, however, i’m afraid i cannot do that”

>>>

after a very long time of persuading the housewarden, riddle agrees; reluctantly but is he really being reluctant? He had always wanted to try trick-or-treating and was always jealous of the neighborhood kids who he saw happily go from house to house.

so when halloween comes around, riddle leaves his post early feeling a little guilty, to go find you.

“riddle! hey!” you wave to him feeling excited, after all, it’s been years since you last trick-or-treated with your friends.   

“hello” riddle greets you, a bit ashamed for skipping even though he did tell everyone at heartslabyul that he would take off early for “personal reasons.”

after meeting up with riddle the two of you took off going on a bus to one the nearby neighborhoods.

>>>

you hadn’t anticipated how awkward it would be; two college students running around from house to house, clearly too old to be trick-or-treating. but in the end it was the most fun you two had in years. 

{31 daydreams of halloween event lineup}

{twisted wonderland masterlist}

[masterangst]

Be Worth Something

Summary: Tav (named Axel) gives Astarion a present, and Astarion sucks it up and returns the kindness by learning to comfort someone else.

Pairing: Astarion × Tav (MxM)

Words: 4.4K

Warnings: hurt/comfort, fluff, a bit unedited

A/N: This is a bit self indulgent. Just a scene I imagined occurring between Astarion and my Tav sometime in Act 3 after Cazador. Also this is for Whump October (it's October somewhere).

No. 31: Emptiness | Setbacks | Take it easy

Gortash was dead. Cazador was dead.

The band of weirdos were getting closer and closer to confronting the source of the little creatures taking their brains for a ride. Everyone agrees it's a good idea to rid themselves of the problem. Astarion would agree as well. He had no interest in becoming a mind flayer. He had his body taken from him once, sure to the hells was not going to let that happen again.

However, unlike the others. Astarion would not be set completely free. Each day felt like a ticking clock towards his shackles back to the shadows and good gods did that not fill him with dread.

"Astarion, freetra starta den lun." Axel's deep voice cuts through the thoughts in Astarion's head. The ranger waits for Astarion's red eyes to meet his piercing gray ones before he smiles warmly. "I have a surprise for you."

Catching himself, Astarion performs a smile. "A surprise? For me?" He clicks his tongue, pretending to be shocked. "How adorably sweet of you."

Axel's chest rumbles with a stifled laugh. "Well, what can I say," Axel's calloused hand guides Astarion's to his soft lips, his eyes looking longingly into Astarion's, "I love to spoil you." If Astarion's heart could still beat, he's sure it would have skipped one.

He had confessed his love for the leader of their group. For the one who had stuck with him no matter what. The stubborn and goofy man who loved the color blue so he made his entire attire blue and somehow made it look good. Astarion told the man he loved him and yet he still is not used to this. Before he would throw back some flirty banter and try not to think about it, but Astarion promised himself he would try harder for Axel. That he would try his hardest to be more genuine.

He still doesn't know what he's doing.

"Is it an excuse for me to not attend this event?" Astarion asks as Axel drags him away and up the stairs of the Elfsong.

Axel smirks over his shoulder, "Oh, yes."

Astarion can't help but smirk back, "My, aren't you a playful little mouse."

Axel snorts with a scoff. "I like to think I'm more of a wolf."

"Don't go telling that to Shadowheart, darling."

Axel stops outside an unfamiliar door and spins on his heels to face Astarion. There is a devilish look on his face. One that intrigues Astarion, and makes him nervous.

"Close your eyes, Starta." Again with that name. A common thing the man likes to call him. The phrase, freetra starta den Lun, has been Axel's version of "darling" it seems. Frustrating considering Astarion has no idea what it means.

With a huff, Astarion does as he is told like a good boy. "If you are leading me to my ultimate death, this is quite an inconvenient time for it."

"Is there a convenient time to get murdered?" The sound of the door creaks open. The faint aromas of lavender, mint, and roses fill the moist air. There's a heat radiating from the side of the room and Astarion knows what is waiting for him before he even opens his eyes.

"You can open your eyes now." A steaming tub of freshly poured water, lined with books, wine, flowers and various soaps presents themselves to him.

The quip dies on Astarion's tongue, like a rat caught in a trap. Instead his expression turns to confusion. "What is this?"

Axel smiles, "I thought you might enjoy some peace and quiet instead of loud drinking. So I found some books for you. I'm not sure if you'd like them, but then I wasn't sure what you might want. I also bought some soaps for ya, I noticed you liked more earthy, flowery smells, so I picked out some of those. I hope you like one of them."

Astarion cups his lover's warm cheek, smiling at the way the otherwise stoic and few words man rambles when he gets nervous. Can hear the way Axel's heart pounds in his chest. Worry plaguing his features. How could he be so worried about something so thoughtful? Did he think Astarion would hate this gift?

"This is too kind." This is true. Axel was always too kind to Astarion. It twisted his insides more than a knife ever could.

To think. Astarion would get his revenge, walk in the sun, and be gifted a man who wanted nothing from him other than Astarion to be happy. He didn't believe such a person existed until Axel.

Axel's features relax and he leans in to press a short kiss to Astarion's lips. When he pulls away Astarion's stomach tightens in anticipation. A gross part of himself awaits for something. He tries to convince himself he doesn't know what it is, but Astarion does. He told Axel he loved him, but has yet to hear the half-elf say it back. Astarion hates how desperate he is to hear it. When was the last time someone said it to him and meant it? Said it not in post ecstasy?

"Not really." Axel shrugs nonchalantly on purpose to tease him specifically. Astarion pouts and drops his hand.

Axel chuckles and cups Astarion's cheeks, "Enjoy yourself. If you need anything…well better tell me now because I'll be downstairs." Axel grins, probably believing he's the funniest man to walk Faerun.

It isn't until Axel steps past Astarion does he realize what the man said. "You aren't staying?"

"I promised Haslin I'd best him in drinking. I can't let him down."

Astarion scoffs and shakes his head. "Wouldn't it be more fun?" Astarion tries again, gesturing towards the tub as he backs away with a button already off his coat.

Axel's eyes roam Astarion's body with appreciation, before stopping at his eyes with warmth. "This is your relaxation, meg louvè. Enjoy it." With that Axel slips out the room, leaving Astarion alone.

Astarion scowls at the romantic display, nauseated even. All of this and just for him and him alone? He could trick himself into thinking he was royalty if it wasn't for the distant roar of the people a floor below.

Astarion sighs and tears his armor off him and chucks it into the corner. His previous thoughts sour the relaxation he's meant to feel when he enters the tub. This act is just another reason why the upcoming battle terrifies him. He already can't offer anything to Axel, but to add in not being able to walk alongside him in the sun? To force Axel to walk the shadows as Astarion will; and soon.

Astarion sighs and eases into the tub. He scans the array of options and lands on lavender and smiles. Sometimes I can't tell if I hate that man or love him.

….

Time was lost on Astarion. He soaked in the tub until he was practically the same temperature as a human and then until the water was cold. He moved on to drying off and laying on the luxury bed with a book in hand. Flipped through some of that until the noise downstairs turned into a stampede of wild animals, shaking the very bed itself.

Curiosity tugged at his skin. Despite his best effort he couldn't stop himself from wondering what fun the others could be having. Drinking, partying, letting the atmosphere carry away your burdens. Astarion isn't a virgin to the wild of a late night tavern, but he can't remember a time he partaken without the heavy dread of knowing it would lead to the demise of some poor fool wanting to use him for temporary bliss.

This time would be different. Cazador is dead.

It was a fact that still felt so foreign.

Besides, he's bored.

Astarion freshens up and strides downstairs to meet the excitable crowd head on. Elfsong was one of Astarion's prowl sites, but he never saw the tavern quite like this. The room stunk with the smell of beer, sweat, and weirdly blood. The closer he got to the center of the mass, the more he began to recognize one source of it. The familiar sweetness from his tasty treat himself, Axel.

The ranger's face was cut on the arch of his brow. Blood had dried where it streamed down the side of his face. His lip was split and his chin bruised, but Axel still wore a beaming smile on his face.

"You're alone for five minutes and already got yourself in trouble." Astarion clicks his tongue. "Quite embarrassing, darling."

Axel holds up a finger to silence Astarion, his movements sluggish. "Don't flirt with me. I'm taken." His voice is quite clear for a man clearly drunk. Axel doesn't seem to notice it's Astarion he's speaking to either, the man's eyes are too focused on the men arm wrestling in the corner. Something stirred inside Astarion's undead heart. Taken. Astarion quite likes the sound of that.

Astarion flashes his signature grin. "Darling, do you not even recognize your own lover? I feel I should be sad?" He fakes a pout.

Astarion's chest squeezes an unbearable amount of feeling into him the moment Axel's eyes immediately melt into complete admiration when he turns and looks at Astarion. Has any creature in existence ever been gazed upon with such purity, such love and adoration? Clerics live to serve their gods they have chosen. They devote themselves completely to their god, body and soul. But is this what the gods feel when their devotees look to them. When they are prayed to? Or are they not nearly as lucky? Astarion turned down being a god in favor of being his pathetic self, but in that tiny moment he imagines he must have been one.

Axel places his hands over his heart, his face screwed up in agonizing fondness. "Oh, Astarion. Meg Starta. How beautiful you look in this lighting." There's a lightness in Axel's voice that's not normally there, his breath reeking of ale. Astarion grimaces, but he can't say he doesn't enjoy the peppered kisses Axel gives his face.

"You may want to take him upstairs." Wyll whispers into Astarion's ear from behind. Axel gets distracted by Haslin, joining the large man at the bar like a moth to a flame.

"He seems to still be enjoying himself." Astarion shrugs, his face plastered with a sly smile.

Wyll snorts, "That may be the problem my pale friend. He has drank twice as much as any of us and already lost in a boxing match. He might need some rest now." Something on Wylls face makes Astarion squint at him. There is something else the man wants to say to him.

"Is that all?" Astarion raises a brow, trying to hide his curiosity behind a veil of annoyance.

Wyll glances over at Axel and Haslin before lowering his voice so only Astarion could hear. "If I didn't know any better. I'd say Axel was looking forward to losing."

Astarion wanted to scoff. To laugh in Wylls face for such an absurd idea. "The man who refuses to lose to anything? I doubt it, perhaps that last eye of yours is failing you."

Wyll shrugs, "I've seen Axel throw punches. He's not the strongest, but he's quick. He was definitely holding back, even if he is drunk." Wylls face droops into worry. "I'm just saying. Maybe it's best if he lays down. Before he burns himself up."

Astarion was not good at emotions. Whether they be his own or others. He was not like Wyll or Haslin. He's not the best at comforting, but that never stopped him from trying even if it meant for him to fail. He could just play it off as a joke later.

Axel never seemed to need to be comforted. His emotions were held tighter than Astarion's, and if he was feeling something he was very honest and straight-forward with it. Most days, most nights..actually every time it's Axel comforting Astarion. Reassuring him, loving him, comforting him.

Even now, Axel looks happy. His flushed cheeks stained red, but has a lazy smile on his face as Haslin speaks to him. A sudden creeping feeling comes up from the shadows in Astarion's mind. Am I the last to know what's going on with him?

He has seen how close Axel is with Karlach. Had discovered a small bit of details about Axel through her or Haslin more than anything from Axel's mouth himself. A part of him wondered if Axel truly trusted him, surely he must if Axel claims to care for him. Then why hasn't he said I love you back?

The doubt was settling in. Astarion was weak to it at the best of times, why would he expect to be strong to it now. Anytime his self loathing led him down a desolate path, Axel always was there to be a guiding hand back to the light. For now Astarion will push those thoughts away and help his lover to bed like he knows someone much kinder than him would do.

He tugs on Axel's sleeve, perhaps a little too rough as Axel stumbles a bit into Astarion. "Time for bed, my love." Astarion bites back his growing annoyance and keeps up his smile.

Axel groans in protest, like a child whining. "Oh, alright. Whatever you wish." Axel let's Astarion lead him back to the room. Astarion is more than pleased to be away from such pounding noise. He didn't realize how loud it was down there until they reached the tranquil silence of their shared room for the night. Up here Astarion could think more clearly; though he can't tell if that's a good thing or not.

Axel shuffles in behind Astarion, heading straight for the bed and collapsing partly on top without care. Astarion rolls his eyes, "You still have your shoes on you big oaf." Axel only responds with a muffled groan and then silence. He's clearly not asleep.

Astarion huffs and kneels down to yank the boots off himself. He will not have this bed soiled, not when he only gets it once. Axel is lucky he doesn't chop his feet off instead.

Astarion kicks his own off and settles them down nicely by the foot of the bed. He sighs and plops down on the edge besides Axel and crosses his arms over his chest with a pout.

Axel stirs and turns over, glancing at Astarion before sitting up. "You look beautiful tonight."

The irritation Astarion felt eases away slightly at those words. Still, that doesn't stop him from feeling whatever strange concoction was brewing in his chest.

"Flattery won't win you anything tonight, darling."

Axel doesn't acknowledge those words. He rubs his head and winces when he feels the cut above his brow. Astarion's eyes widen for a moment and he sighs as he dampens a towel. Astarion sits by Axel's side and presses the cloth to his lover's face.

Axel doesn't even wince. There's something distant in his eyes. Astarion recognizes that look. He would say he has seen it in the mirror when he sees himself, but Astarion can not see himself anymore. That doesn't stop him from knowing. There was something that Axel said to Astarion once. "I know that look, because I'm familiar with it."

Again, Astarion knows he's not the best when it comes to the nursing part of whatever it is they are. For 200 years he's had no one to nurture him, he has forgotten how those muscles work. But he wants nothing more than to be there the same as Axel has. To provide him with something when all he could think about earlier is how he was lacking in that department. Astarion wanted to see him smile.

"Love, you should be more careful with this pretty face of yours. I'd hate to see it ruined." Astarion purrs.

Axel chuckles and scratches his neck, "Ah, I've been through worse." At least he seems aware enough. Not too far gone it seems, which is good.

Wylls words come back to Astarion and the curiosity eats away at him again. He thinks of how he can spin his words into a pretty picture. Astarion fakes a chuckle and a little wave, "It almost seems like you were trying to lose." Astarion laughs.

Axel snorts and shrugs, "Most times I fight in a bar I lose. That's the point." Darkness is creeping into Axel's eyes. Emptiness like a black void. Astarion is unfamiliar with this Axel. Perhaps even unaware this side of his lover existed. Was this Axel's real self or was it the alcohol making his brain fuzzy and tired? Either way, the confession left Astarion feeling uneasy.

Astarion thought more carefully on how to phrase his words and instead decided to take a page from Axel's (or anyone else's) book and ask, "Do you want to talk about it?"

Axel shook his head, "No." That was his usual response. Axel didn't talk about himself or his past. He told stories of beasts and his brother when the group was around the campfire, but those were adventure stories. Axel revealed his mother was a druid to Haslin and that's the most intimate detail Astarion knows. Other than arbitrary details like favorite places or colors or animals.

Astarion couldn't help the words that flowed out of his mouth. "Why do you not like telling me about yourself?" And just like that, fear gnawed at his stomach. He could only stare at Axel with uncomfortable vulnerability, awaiting for the horrible truth to carve another poem into his back.

Axel suddenly springs up, marching over to the vanity with his fists clenched tightly. "Because I have nothing worth telling. My stories aren't worth telling. I'm not worth knowing!" Axel yells, his face full of fury uncommon on his features. He seems to catch his temper and sighs as his body relaxes just enough to calm his voice. "Why can't you understand that?" Axel speaks more to himself than to Astarion.

Astarion was taken aback by the sudden outburst. He has only ever seen anger on Axel during a battle against an enemy, never towards anyone else. Axel is disgustingly kind and empathic. Calm and poised most of the time when he's not being goofy. Astarion isn't sure how to respond. "Axel."

Axel looks into the mirror and Astarion can see his lover's face through it. Axel grimaces and looks away. "I hate feeling like this. I don't know why it's coming up now. Emptiness. Of course I lost that fight. Who holds back on fighting?" Axel spits over his shoulder, the frustration back on his features. "That man should have knocked me out. Most of them do."

Astarion's face twists in sadness. To think Axel would seek out pain in such a way, and to learn he's sought it out before. Astarion wants to reach out to him, but Axel isn't done.

"My life has been kind to me, so why would I insult you by bringing it up? I am not rich, or powerful. I am not exciting. I am boring. I am a boring lover. I am foolish and dumb. You deserve so much more." Axel's face turns from anger to anguish. "You deserve someone exciting. You have the freedom to find that person and I know you will."

Axel hangs his head and shakes it. "And I will not hate you for it. I could never hate you. You deserve someone who isn't like this." Axel gestures to himself. "I have nothing to offer. You think you are the only person who feels unworthy? Feels they offer nothing? I can't even offer you the freedom to explore. How selfish I am to know you deserve more yet keeps you to myself."

Axel looks in the mirror again and the anger returns. "You wish to see yourself in the mirror and I only wish to rid myself of such a burden." Axel rips the mirror from the vanity in a flurry of rage, the mirror shattering into a million pieces.

Axel takes in a deep breath and looks at the mess he's created. His face crumbles and his voice shakes and wavers as tears prick his eyes. "I'm a failure. You deserve someone better. Take it," Axel pinches his nose as a tear falls down his cheek, "take it from someone who loves you. I will not say it knowing it'd cement you to me. I can not. I do not deserve anyone's love, but I can't bear the thought of losing someone else. If you were to leave and I have said it, the pain would be too real."

Axel's chest lurches with a sob. "I… I don't know what is wrong with me. Why, why are these feelings coming back to me? I have a responsibility to you and the others and yet I'm failing once again. Is this why I'm alive, to continue to fail?" Axel crumbled to his knees, his hand catching himself, but on the shards of glass. Astarion smells the blood, but Axel doesn't seem to notice the pain.

Astarion feels numb. His chest hurts, if his heart could still beat it would be breaking. How could Axel feel so unworthy, when he was arguably the only one bringing anything to the table? That's the second time Axel has referred to himself as unexciting. The first time being when Axel declared he didn't need another lover and that he wished for Astarion to not have one either. That if Astarion wished to have that option, then he should end it.

Everything else Axel said was working slowly over in Astarion's mind. He knows some of that was not for him. That something else darkens Axel's mind, but the half-elf is not in the state to elaborate.

Astarion kneels down gently by Axel's side, guiding the man's chin up to face him. Axel's face is a mess of tears and his eyes are heavy with fatigue and fear. Astarion can hear how fast Axel's heart is beating, like the sound of a war drum.

Astarion doesn't say anything other than, "take it easy." His honeyed words are lost to him. For now he guides his lover back to the bed and licks up the blood on Axel's hand before pulling out a healing potion for him to drink. Axel's chest is still heaving, but the tears have stopped. Now he sits mindless as Astarion guides him. The display is unnerving for Astarion, but he knows he must fight through it.

When Axel's face clears up, Astarion cups his cheeks and brings his lips to Axel's. It's tender and Astarion tries all his might to put every ounce of his feelings into it.

"Listen to me." Axel looks into Astarion's eyes. "Why would I want someone else, when I didn't even know I needed you? You are not boring. And you have not failed me. Or the others. I'm not afraid of your darkness. You are worth knowing. I want to know everything. You think anything you could tell me would shock me?" Astarion huffs with a sad smile. He grows serious. "This will pass. And I will still be here when it does. I love you."

Axel swallows and smiles. "Freetra starta den lun. Meg louvè. I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have burdened you."

Astarion scoffs, but not with malice, but in sadness. "I'm glad I'm not the only one who struggles with this. If anything it brings me closer to you. Your burdens are mine to bear, just as you have carried mine. It's the least I could do."

Axel buries his head in the crook of Astarion's neck. He takes a long sniffle and Astarion can feel Axel's lips twist into a smile. "Lavender. I knew you'd go for that one." Axel's hot breath on Astarion's skin makes his body flutter in a way he has never experienced until he met Axel.

Astarion kisses the top of Axel's head. "You know me too well."

Axel hums and wraps his arms around Astarion's waist, digging his nose deeper into the crook. "Smells amazing on you." Axel groans as he takes another sniffle and Astarion can smell the desire now replacing the anguish in Axel. It almost makes Astarion laugh when he's suddenly reminded how drunk Axel actually is.

Axel doesn't try anything. He simply seems content just holding Astarion in bears grip. The warm intimate feeling is comforting, despite the guilt of knowing it was him who was meant to comfort Axel. Seeing an opportunity, however, Astarion asks. "My love?"

Axel hums and it vibrates against Astarion's skin. If his body was capable of it, he'd get goose bumps. "You have been using those phrases of yours since our first confession. Yet it is in a language I do not understand." Astarion is hoping he can lead Axel to the ledge and the drunk man can take the leap himself. He's afraid if he asks him full on, Axel will deny him the knowledge. He usually does, stating "that's the point, darling".

Axel shrugs. "It's Jotun. It means my star and moon. Is that the one? The other means, my love." Astarion's body blossoms with warmth, disgusting happiness he can't help but cringe at.

What sweet phrases. Am I truly his star and moon?

"I didn't want to tell you, because I was embarrassed. I didn't want to scare you off and I thought I would if you knew how much I was falling in love with you." Axel said, muffled against Astarion's skin. Astarion remembers Axel's words. I will not say it knowing it'd cement you to me.

Astarion forces Axel to look at him. Now Axel's eyes are hazy with half sleep and Astarion can't help but think he looks absolutely adorable. "Tell me you love me." Astarion all but demands.

Axel smiles tiredly. "I love you." And he means it. Astarion smiles and tucks Axel into bed, holding him close. Though, mostly because Axel refuses to let go.

Suddenly the fears of what the future holds seem less scary now that he knows Axel loves him as well. It seems Axel isn't the perfect untouchable thing he saw him as. And that only makes Astarion's longing for him grow.

Cazador believed flawed things were an abomination. Astarion disagrees. As much as he claims to hate the weak and flawed. Flawed things are much more beautiful. And to know he doesn't have to carry that burden alone. That makes it all worth it. Even perhaps giving up the sun. Because Axel is worth it.

[randoimago]

Day 20 - Childhood Friends to Lovers

Fandom: Persona 5

Character(s): Yuuki Mishima

Type of Request: 31 Days of October

Note(s): I love Mishima so much and I very much miss him.

"Look at how many users there are!"

You couldn't help a smile at how excited Mishima was. It was the most excited you've seen him in a long time. Not since joining and making the volleyball team as a regular. But now, as he showed you the app he created, his eyes shone brightly as a wide smile is on his face.

"Yeah, you're really cool Mishima," you tell him, which seems to make him so much happier. He always did enjoy validation. And even though his cheeks were still covered in healing bruises and bandages, you noticed a bit of pink on his cheeks.

"Well, I'm not that great. I mean, it's the phantom thieves that saved the school..." Mishima trails off as his eyes go to the comments coming in on one of the general chat rooms. "It'd be nice if there wasn't so much trolling. I'll need to work double time with the filtering."

"Or you could rest?" You suggested instead.

Mishima hasn't had a moments rest since Kamoshida left. Being one of the victims, of course the local news network wanted to cover the story. And then there was the newspaper club at school. And then other students that would come up to him and offer "sympathies" despite praising Kamoshida's name previously.

And now, instead of laying down and closing his eyes to rest, he's working on a damn app. It is amazing how much energy he has now, but you're definitely concerned that it's going to lead to him crashing.

"Yeah, yeah, I'll take a nap later," Mishima replies in a teasing tone, but you see appreciation in his eyes. As well as something else that makes your heart race and hope. You just give him a smile as you lean a bit closer as he shows off more of what he's got so far with the app. Mishima leans into your touch in return.

You two have always been a bit touchy growing up. Well, once you both got past the "girls/boys have cooties" stage. There's been hugs and hand holding and just you two being affectionate. But it's always been as friends, which you didn't mind before but now that you're older and realize your feelings. Well, things are definitely different.

And then the Kamoshida thing happened, and it did put a bit of a damper on your relationship with Mishima for a bit. Just because he didn't want you involved to keep you safe, and you hated it. Thank god for those phantom thieves, whoever they are (you know who they are, but you pretend not to so Mishima can feel cool about knowing them).

"I am really happy to see you smiling more, Yuuki," you murmur as you glance up at him, finding that he's already looking at you. He flushes a bit and gives a sigh.

"Yeah, I know you were worried about me before. Thank you for staying by my side."

"I wouldn't dream of leaving you."

There's silence after that, a comfortable one, before Mishima puts his phone up and you move away so he can properly lay down. You hesitate a bit. You two have slept in the same bed together when you were much much younger. And you doubted Mishima would try anything, but still...

"Hey," Mishima says your name softly and you look to him as he smiles a bit and moves so you can lay next to him. You do and he seems to hesitate before putting an arm around you. "I'm glad that we're friends... But... Have you ever wondered-"

"All the time." You don't let him finish his statement because you knew what he was going to ask. Mishima's eyes widen when you do cut him off but he smiles and holds you a bit tighter.

"Good... Sakamoto is going to be so jealous when I tell him I have a partner before he does." You can't help a snort at that. Poor Ryuji.

Taglist:

@reo-the-leo

[libra-stellium]

This is an astrology and Taylor Swift post. I'm kind of obsessed with profection years and I have been listening to her album Midnights. I did not proof read this at all lol and if I'm wrong just pretend with me because I was excited thanks!

In Would've Could've Should've (my favorite song) she goes back and forth about how she regrets “dancing with the devil” at 19 and if she had known then what she knows now then she would’ve stayed praying and 19 is what?? An 8H year!

She mentions devil, ghosts, wounds, weapons idk if they're actually in the 8H but it's the vibe of trauma and death. To me she's describing the darkness of an 8H year and how you face a lot of trauma and of course the type depends on what sign you have in your own 8H. I relate so hard to this because I was going through it at 19 as well! I was in my first relationship and it was toxic, I was learning how to live away from home, my grandmother passed and it was the first death where I was conscious of what was going on.

And throughout the song she says "now that I know" which lets us know she's passed the 8H and looking back on it. She then says that she would've stayed on her knees, god's honest truth, heaven. What is that? 9H vibes! Knowing better after coming out of the 8H!

This song was MADE to be my fave bc it has all my themes 😂 it has to do with a relationship (all my Libra) it has to do with 8H (most of my placements) and 9H (where I have my Pluto and mars) it was love at first listen!

Then this got me thinking more about Taylor's profection years! This album came out October 2022 and her birthday is in December which means that when she wrote this song and the album was released she was 32! Bc she just turned 33 in December. 32 is what?? A 9H year!! She had just gone through another 8H year at 31 probably reliving some themes from when she was 19 and whatever lessons weren’t learned which is why she was reflecting on that time and when she turned 32 she had learned her lessons and can now see where she went wrong like now she knows but it’s bittersweet bc you can’t change the past 🤷🏾‍♀️ philosophy is also 9H??

As an added bonus if you read this far lol: in 2020 she canceled her tour for Lover. She was in her saturn return in Capricorn. A major setback! Also she was 30 still in April so a 7H year (libra house/ relationships) and that tour/album is called Lover!

Then her saturn return ends in December 2020 when saturn goes into Aquarius and that’s when she turns 31 starting her 8H year and when she releases Evermore which has a song called closure on it like how fitting! Closing out saturn return and 8H representing endings and past things and what does she start to do????????? Re-recording and she does what during this 8H year?? RERELEASES FEARLESS that was released WHEN?? In 2008 when she was what?? 19!!!!!!! In an 8H year! And people were confused why she re-recorded and released Red before speak now instead of going in order but I think it’s because it was about reliving her past wounds and Red was recorded when she was 23 in a 12H year of literally enemies, cheating, and pain which is similar to 8H vibes! Speak Now was a 10H year release so not the same vibes at all and to me the songs were very curated to be for career advancement. An album made for the purpose of pleasing fans 😬 which I also found out from a tiktok is her least streamed album 😩

I also saw people mention she wanted to name the album Enchanted because that’s her favorite song off there but the label didn’t let her lol and now they're speculating that she’s going to rerelease speak now soon and call it Enchanted like she wanted to! I believe it because it would line up since now at 33 she’s in a 10H year just like when she released speak now 👀👀

If you read the whole thing I love you!

[sun-lit-roses]

I'm still here, prompting away! This is just October 34th, that's all.

I took another whack at some of the Trektober NSFW prompts - it's *almost* NSFW? NSFW-ish? We're getting closer. Details below the cut!

Prompt Day: 18, 19, 31

Fandom: Star Trek Strange New Worlds

Rating: M (let's go with NSFW-lite)

Warnings/Tags: N/A

Summary:

Marie had long ago come to terms with the fact that she was not a romantic. When she was younger, she had acted like one, but frankly she was too old to pretend to be something she wasn’t. All of the expected romantic gestures seemed pointless and performative to her and that wasn’t something that was going to change.

Chris was a complete romantic.

[locitawritingsblog]

I posted 255 times in 2022

That's 255 more posts than 2021!

89 posts created (35%)

166 posts reblogged (65%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@genericficerblog

@locitapurplepink

@foundationsretail

@cassie-fanfics

@photogirl894

I tagged 198 of my posts in 2022

Only 22% of my posts had no tags

#oc design - 60 posts

#tag game - 58 posts

#picrew - 57 posts

#writing post - 35 posts

#star wars fanfiction - 31 posts

#sw resistance - 30 posts

#star wars resistance - 30 posts

#my ocs - 28 posts

#oc ask game - 25 posts

#the bad batch - 23 posts

Longest Tag: 75 characters

#if anything i loved the surprise of getting them without knowing even more!

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

@tiny-badbatcher asked me to write about Kaz and Torra's relationship and this is second time of this pairing. It took awhile to figure and I got one.

Memories to Keep It

Kaz & Torra

Based on Xiono Story series (my fanfic)

Torra still felt gulity what happened at her husband's blanket. She knew his blanket was a gift from his uncle from years ago who he was used to love spending time with.

She forgot to feed her pet, Buggles which making him so hungry and looked anywhere that he could eat or bite. He looked at Kaz's sunflower blanket.

Even through Kaz forgive her but she still felt that she didn't deserve it.

At night, Kaz just finished doing his face mask and heading to the bed but quickly mentioned Torra was down as rubbing Buggles' back.

"Hey, is everything alright, Honeylatte ?"

Torra sighed "Not really. "

He hold his hand "You know you can tell anything, right ? That's what our marriage for."

She took breath as staring at him with tears in her eyes "I feel guilty about ripped your special blanket. I know that you forgive me but I feel like...I don't deserve it. I started thinking if you'd...rather left me than this."

Kaz shook his head as wiping her tears "Torra, don't say like that. I know that you didn't mean that on purpose and I know how much you love me since you were acting crazy when we first time met."

Torra chuckled "But you chose me to race against with."

"Let's say that a nikto friend told everyone on this station after I accidentally talked about my dream to be the best pilot. It was driving me crazy." The couple laught.

At the same time, Buggled walked to Kaz and slept on his lap "But at least I survived." He rubbed his back.

"You see, Honeylatte. Even through I don't have stuffs to remember but at least I have good memories in my mind like Uncle John was used to put me on his shoulder and pretended to be my ship and we flew away." He told her.

"Since you told me this, I've been seeing you play that game with Ayumi and she really enjoy it." She replied.

"Yep, and I still would do that again."

"Until she's too heavy to carry." She teased.

"Hey... " "Kaz, no, stop it.." Kaz tickled Torra on her stomach, she laught loudly until the couple lay down on the bed.

After that, Kaz touched her cheek "Torra, no matter what happen between us, I won't leave you. You're a part of me that need to stick together with."

Torra took breath and smiled "You're a part of me too." Then the couple kissed each other while Buggles laid down between them.

"Sweet dream, honeylatte."

"Sweet dream, my love."

And they all fell asleep together.

The end

Hope you like this one.

I tag @foundationsretail , @tiny-badbatcher , @cassie-fanfics , @zaya-mo , @genericficerblog , @thebadbatch2022 , and @girlzrok-archive

16 notes - Posted October 9, 2022

#4

This is my drawing for my Star Wars Resistance Modern AU fanfic on wattpad, Hope Inside.

I drew this two years ago. Let me tell you about this family.

Jarek Yeager adopted his three kids after he lost his biogical family during the accident.

First, he adopted Neeku when he was a baby, next he adopted Tam on the street who survived from the house fire when she was 13 years old, and lastly, Kaz. He mentioned that something off with him until he figured out that he was abused by his drunk father and took him to his house and overtime, Kaz felt safe and loved by his new family.

What do you think @cassie-fanfics , @zaya-mo , @thebadbatch2022 , @girlzrok-archive , @foundationsretail and @tiny-badbatcher ?

17 notes - Posted October 6, 2022

#3

I just finished drawing Omega wearing a junior high school for my Bad Batch High School fanfic.

Here some things about her :

She's more comfortable wearing trousers than skirts but when she has to wear school skirt, she would always wearing leggings.

This school uniform is inspired by one of my uniforms when I was in elementary school 😅

She's more comfortable wearing boots than sneakers as you guys can see on this picture.

What do you think @cassie-fanfics , @zaya-mo , @crosshairs-simp, @the-sith-in-the-sky-with-diamond , @s-pirth-lemonade , @littlefeatherr , and anyone else who wants to see this.

18 notes - Posted October 10, 2022

#2

Tell me a reason why you want to write star wars fanfics then tag five blogs who also love writing too.

Mine is expressing my imagination into the story to be remembered.

@photogirl894 , @foundationsretail , @kanerallels , @thebadbatch2022 , and @genericficerblog

28 notes - Posted November 2, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Ayumi enjoying her drink.

I tag @photogirl894 , @leosardonyx18 , @cassie-fanfics , @genericficerblog , @zaya-mo , @l-lend , @tinysbandanadad , @tiny-badbatcher , @summer-1902 , and anyone else who wants to.

41 notes - Posted August 23, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[anmiruzu]

hello i request yashiro nene with prompts 9

by the way good job on the writing you did and anyway have a nice spooky day :D

a sleepy morning

a/n hii thank you, you too! anyways, let’s just pretend i posted this on time ;3 totally have not been procrastinating/busy. also look at yashiro! she looks so cute in this manga panel

-160 words-

October eleventh,

nene yashiro; prompt 09: “i really appreciate that you're getting into the halloween spirit, but it's eight in the morning.”

the night before halloween, you pulled an all-nighter, not because you were excited for the upcoming holiday but because you had to cram in some assignments. and so the next day, you came in tired, you’re normally tired when you come to school, however, this time is different; you didn’t get to drink your coffee because they ran out.

sighing to yourself, you walked into kanome academy, noticing the black and orange halloween decorations. not yet seeing the approaching yashiro from behind you switched out your shoes (i’m pretty sure they do that there right?).

“happy halloween!” she suddenly says in your ear as she hugs you.

despite being tired and slightly grouchy from the lack of sleep, you return her greeting.

“happy halloween. y’know, i really appreciate that you're getting into the halloween spirit, but it's eight in the morning.”

yashiro chuckles nervously before apologizing, “sorry! i was just excited. also, when you’re done changing, let’s go see hanako!”

(you can still request! ^^)

{slots taken 18/30} ⟡ {rules/prompts}

{31 daydreams of halloween event lineup}

{jibaku shounen hanako-kun masterlist}

[sinnerdolly]

Request by @ninsora

Mikey, Draken, Smiley and Baji x fem! reader.

Summary: You're the rookie in the Touman, and your boyfriend see you fighting by the first time.

Warning: no.

English isn't my mother language so if you see any error you're welcome to correct me.

Mikey Sano

Since you start dating with Mikey you became a Touman member. But your tittle still been Mikey's girl, because he didn't let anyone treat you as an ordinary member. And be his girlfriend came with immunity for any agression to you.

In a few words, Mikey hadn't the chance to see you fight. Was October 31 when he realized about it. You avoid a punch from Kazutora, entangling you in his arm and throwing him to the floor, choking him with your foot down his throat.

Letting all the spectators in shock, including Mikey. He smiled overflow of proud, in that moment you officially turned a Touman member.

Draken

You weren't a fight's fan, be the vice-president's girl help you to avoid Touman disputes. But, when Takemichi tell you about the conspiracy to kill Draken, you were the first in front Moebius gang in the festival night.

You did all your anatomy allowed you to protect your boyfriend. Draken wasn't surprised when he saw you, he imagined you can defend yourself, but you were better than he thought.

He was with hearts in the eyes seeing you knock down guys the double of you.

If he was crazy about you, seeing you trying to save him had made him want to propose to you.

Smiley

Nahoya likes sweet girls, who worry about him and heal his injuries after a gang fight. So... he didn't have a good reaction when he knew you'll be part of the Touman. Because you're Smiley's cute little girlfriend, his role in this relationship is protect you. And above that, Mikey didn't put you in his division, he put you with Mitsuya.

So, in the first fight you took part, he was slope of you all time. Until you, his cute kitten, broke the arm of some guy in front of him without any doubt.

Since that, Smiley didn't complain about it again, now he knows you can protect yourself he's in peace with the idea of you as his Touman's partner.

Baji

Baji is another case of over protective boyfriend. Why we will deny it, he's savage, he loves punch asshole in the face, and more if they flirt with you. And you let him, because he looks so hot when he does it.

But that day you were in a bad mood, without desire of pretend to be a damsel in distress. And an unbearable guy got close to you trying to flirt, despite you rejected him as clear as you could.

Baji saw the situation in the distance, arriving to you, willing to kick that idiot long away. But he stopped his walk in shock when you poke that guy's stomach and then you knock down him with a punch in the cheekbone.

After that you have him all the week asking you where do you learned to punch that way, and why you didn't tell him. Unfortunately, now he wants you as his fight couple too, not as his damsel in distress anymore.

[sapphorarelyreads]

Upcoming GL series

TERFs DON'T INTERACT

1. BetCin - Starting October 15, Every Friday, 8 PM on WeTv

Online couple Beth and Cindy, aka BetCin, is on the verge of breaking up. As they cook up their plan on how to best to say goodbye to their followers the UMAMI'S - they receive an oddly- timed message: You have been selected as one of the semi-finalists for our search for #RelationshipGoals of #RelationshipGoals. What is at stake? 10 million pesos cash and a lot of other prizes! They both need the money, but can they pretend that they are the ideal couple in front of every Umami liking, sharing, and commenting on their every social media content? Can they still tolerate each other's crazy? What chaos will this contest bring to their already chaotic relationship?

2. GAPYuri - GAP the series

The plot is about newly graduated student from uni who start working in a big company cause she admire this super rich girl since young age but when she met her again her image of her completely crashed cause she wasn't like what the media show her and they will ofc fall in love. Mon has just graduated and gets a job in the same company as her idol, sam, who she has admired since she was young. however when she meets Sam her image of her completely changes as she realises that sam is nothing like how the media portrays her.

Starring Becky and Freen

3. NilunDon(2021) - Episode 0 airs on Oct 31 on GagaOOlala

In this love story, Don is a freelance photographer and heir to a famed Seoul hotel and restaurant business. Following the death of his family, Don is called back to Thailand according to his father’s final wishes. It’s when his heart is shattered that he meets Nilun, a gregarious young barista. Meanwhile, producer Pun is head-over-heels in love with her close friend Min, a mischievous YouTuber, while veterinarian Pasin has fallen in love with Don's impish cousin Arlex.

Starring Nitar and Pond - side couple

4. The Girlfriend Planner (2021)

It’s directed by Jojo Tidakorn, who directed also 3 will be free, friend zone, and gay ok bangkok (and who is himself openly gay)

- It stars 6 actresses from the major thai girl group, BNK48 (the Thai sister group of japan’s akb48)

- It will be focused on three couples: Pun x Jennis, Namneung x Noey, and Wee x Fond

- It’s set to air at the end of this year (sometime in the fourth quarter)

- BNK48 is already big in thailand, so this might get a lot of hype

- This Thai Girl Group is very LGBT friendly, they have acknowledged their lesbian fans a bunch of times, so they know how important this project is for them.

Starring BNK48 members

5. Reverse 4 You

Jattawa is a young woman who has the ability to control time and her younger sister, Wii, has the ability to see the future. Jattawa wants to become a lawyer but her sister’s visions say that she will be a prosecutor. However Jattawa thinks her sisters visions are often wrong. Especially her latest vision that Jattawa’s soulmate is Four, a senior who is known as a villain. Jattawa tries to avoid Four because of the rumours about her but she feels a sense of familiarity as though they have lived together before. Jattawa wants to know how she becomes a prosecutor and why she falls in love with Four.

anyone can participate the only requirement is being a gl enthusiast just let us know and we'll add you in!!!!!!

even if you're not in the alliance please always feel free to tag GEA in any gl content you create we'll hype it up <3

current members of the GL Enthusiasts Alliance aka GEA (updated) - @ahxu-laowen

@laowen @raiko101 @jiang-yanlis @tantawans @disaster-j @liyazaki @smittenskitten @piningbisexuals @musicdramalove @sijipavilion @sapphorarelyreads @jenniepanhan @ahxu-laowen @lesbwheein @patrooclus

[wh0reifyoudontexist]

Hi!! I am unloved with "Traitor" I was wondering if you can make a part two in which Astoria sees Y/n and Draco relationship through the year, and one day Y/n and Astoria cross path, and you can take it from there.

time

draco malfoy x bi!fem!reader

past astoria greengrass x bi!fem!reader

no voldy au

angst > a little bit of fluff at the end

request: yes | no

summary: in which Astoria sees Y/n and Draco relationship through the year, and one day Y/n and Astoria cross path, and you can take it from there.

warnings: somewhat toxic!reader, heartbreakk oml, few curse words,

a/n: im so sorry this is late, i was drowning in my school work,,,, not that proud of this but its okay igg

read this first: traitor

masterlist | navigation

time flies by, they said.

opposites attract, they said.

everything will get better, they said.

lie, lie, lie, lies.

for astoria, time seems to be always frozen whenever she passes you. in every hallway she turns in, in every classroom she enters.

and her eyes always manages to find yours already looking at his silver ones.

she would say her eyes are magnets, always wandering off to you, and her heart would break-- bit by bit. but that's okay, she's used to it.

magnets attract the opposite, north to south, south to north. and i could say you were both magnets, once. it didn't matter what pole you were, you always attracted her. genuine question, does spending too much time with someone make you want to repel from them when too much time has been wasted just being in that person's comfort? because if yes, then we know the reason why you don't want to be in her presence anymore. but that doesn't answer astoria's side of the story.

september 1, 1996

all she could do was glare as you entered the compartment, hand tucked within someone else's.

her arms were crossed as her vision left yours and instead focused on the scenery outside the express. but she couldn't focus, she's itching just to take a glance at you, to see you and your perfect face, with your perfect hair, talking with that perfect voice.

her eyes turned just a bit to see you talking to draco malfoy, who has this smile on his face, he couldn't wipe even if he tried.

what happened this summer?

a few months back, you were so happy with her, your hands intertwined under the table, hidden from everyone else's sight, as you gushed about your family, your vacations.

and astoria's face couldn't have shined brighter than it did during that time, a total contrast to her now.

she tried writing to you, all she got in return was nothing. she always waved it off, saying you were probably busy with your family.

she was just hoping to see you on your first day back. and she did, but you didn't even spare her a glance. as if she doesn't even exist, as if you've never met her.

and all she could do was glare.

october 31, 1996

ah, spin the bottle. perfect game for halloween, no? not for you, or so she thought.

you once told her you didn't like these types of games, you said they're for 6th graders.

but she saw you, jumping and face glowing when you pulled draco to sit beside you as people started gathering around the bottle.

was everything else you told her a lie?

december 12, 1996

she entered the common room, wanting the fire's warmth. hours spent writhing in bed, trying to find that perfect position to travel off to sleep. and failing.

that's all she wanted. warmth. yet she received something else, something she wants to wipe off of her memory. you cuddled close to him, your legs intertwining with his as he wrapped an arm around you.

she gasped, and you turned your head to face her.

"greengrass" your boyfriend had said.

"malfoy," she paused before looking at you, tears starting to pool in her waterline remembering the sight she was bestowed upon "l/n"

you nodded your head, hands tightly grasping draco's shirt. "i'm sorry, i just- couldn't sleep, it's freezing, and i thought the common room would be empty, guess not." she laughed awkwardly, her arms behind her back.

"wait" you spoke and she caught your eyes. finally. "you can stay here, we can just go to his dorm. c'mon dray," you pulled yourself up, your dress hiking up your thigh, as you exited the room, draco in tow.

"thanks..." she sat on the couch frozen, tears leaking out of her eyes. oh the envy that she felt.

she didn't get to sleep that night.

february 13, 1996

"i love you" your voice sounded through the wooden door as you told draco,

she wanted to hear you say that, to her. not to him. and she broke all over again.

june 4, 1996

you were planning to surprise your boyfriend for his birthday tomorrow, when you ran into her.

"tori"

"glad to know you still know my name."

"i- what are you doing up?"

she was angry beyond relief, "couldn't sleep. i guess i don't need to ask what you're doing." she said as she turned her head to look at the streamers hanged around the common room.

"yeah, it's his birthday tomorrow. i wanted to surprise him."

"i know, i went to some of his birthday parties at the manor"

then it was silent. and it was deafening.

"can we stop, please?"

"what?"

"let's just stop pretending that everything's fine between us-"

"oh im not pretending, i know that everything's shitty, especially between us. i'm just tired, and all i wanted was to go to sleep but you're here." she turned to walk away, but you grabbed her wrist and she froze. you haven't touched her in forever. and she missed your touch.

"so what, are we not just going to talk about this?"

"what exactly is there to talk about? weren't you the one that left me, pretending that you don't even know me?"

"tori if you would let me explain"

"explain what? that you fell in love with the person who's been treating you like shit ever since first year? what is up with that l/n?" she used your last name. the last name that you once promised her, she would use.

astoria l/n.

you decided not to answer that, "tori, listen he's changed," she scoffed at that but you continued, "if you won't forgive me, then just let me get this off my chest."

"i liked you, you know that" astoria pulled her hands away from you, crossing her arms over her chest instead. and she could've sworn hurt flashed from your eyes. "but i guess a part of me inside have always known that we won't last. tell me you felt it too,"

"i actually haven't. i thought you were my soulmate y/n/n.." she paused wiping her tears frustratedly with her sleeve. "so," you turned your head to face her, grabbing a hold of her hands to let her continue, "you just decided not to talk to me? not even giving me an explanation?" she laughed hurt evident in it.

you let go of her hands, instead grabbing her body and pulling her close to you, so that you were chest to chest. "i hate myself for ever hurting you." you sighed into her head, kissing it with your eyes closed shut. you rubbed your hands on her cheek, astoria immediately melting into it.

"i'm so sorry. if i could take it back i would. i wouldn't think about ever leaving you, i would give us a chance and if we fall by nature, then we fall. i wouldn't be the one that would break us up." she wrapped her arms around your waist again, needing your comfort, and you returned it burying your head on her shoulder.

you decided not to tell her that even if you could go back, you don't want to.. you've already fallen in love with draco.

[thecarnivorousmuffinmeta]

Hey! I love your meta’s, a little while ago you talked about The Order of the Phoenix as an organization could you talk about the Death Eaters?

The post anon is referencing.

TL;DR the Order is incompetently hilarious and Dumbledore is a man who trusts no one.

Oh, the Death Eaters, what to say about the Death Eaters...

In a World Without Voldemort, They'd Probably Be Arsonists

One of the things JKR implies in the series, and something fandom seems to take for granted, is that Tom Riddle is the ultimate corrupting influence.

Were it not for him, the Wizarding World would be a much better place, and people like Bellatrix LeStrange would be productive members of society.

As soon as he is killed, even, by Harry, the good guys win, their problems all presumably solved, and Harry tells his son Albus Severus that it's totally fine if he's put into Slytherin.

I don't believe that though.

To me, it's not so much that Tom Riddle corrupted these people, but that he gave them an organized cause. The people themselves, oh, they were itching for a fight.

In a world without Tom I think they'd be a loosely, poorly organized, group (probably with Bellatrix as the ring leader) where they commit acts of domestic terrorism probably involving burning offensive shops to the ground or attacking muggleborns, halfbloods, and blood traitors.

Voldemort, to me, is designed to pander to them (and not the other way around).

The Death Eaters' Beginnings

So, first off, I think Tom's goals are not what he says they are. What he represents to his followers is exactly what they want to hear, wrapped in a grandiose theatric bow that they just love.

But how did this all start?

First, I don't believe in the Knights of Walpurgis. Instead I think Tom came relatively out of nowhere in the 70's uses parseltongue to prove his heritage as the Heir of Slytherin and thus of purer blood than any of them.

He throws these exciting rallies/parties that the rebellious, angsty, teenage heirs all go to. There he says everything they wanted to hear in the most eloquent manner they've ever heard, promises them the action that their fathers have never delivered, promises them a role in the glorious revolution and a place in history, and probably offers them mounds of cocaine.

All the Death Eaters we see, or the core of them, appear to be in this age range where they'd be in Hogwarts or just out of it when Voldemort came knocking. I can imagine they're all whipped up with excitement, YEAH LET'S BLOW UP THE MUDBLOODS and for some that's great, for others... things don't go the way they expected.

October 31, 1981: It All Falls Apart

Regulus famously steals Tom's horcrux. I imagine it wasn't so much that he learned the error of his ways but that he saw what Tom Riddle was really after: the destruction of his very society.

Lucius is riding high until October 31, 1981 and he sees the complete destruction of the entire Black family. Lucius' priorities greatly shift and as he grows older he prays Voldemort never returns. Unfortunately, Tom does, and he charges interest.

Bellatrix absolutely loses her mind, refuses to accept reality, and tries to torture the Longbottoms for information they do not possess. She is imprisoned in Azkaban and never truly recovers from this.

Snape ends up the cause of death for Lily Evans and must forever live with the guilt and be tied to her prophesied son. He also becomes Dumbledore's lackey forever, which ultimately gets him killed.

Point being, no one's having a good time. Some because they figure out being a Death Eater wasn't all it was cracked up to be, and others because they had the Voldemort rug pulled out from under their feet when Tom Riddle disappears.

Pettigrew flees and lives as the Weasley rat for nearly fifteen years.

They're left making a mad scramble as they try to pick up the pieces of their lives.

Canon Catches Up

More than ten years go by and then suddenly, in a muggle graveyard, the surviving Death Eaters discover that they are bound to Voldemort for the rest of their lives.

Death cannot stop this man and he has branded them: there's no escape.

Some are still enthusiastic supporters of the cause: Bellatrix is vindicated that her lord has returned, he rescues her from hell on earth, and everything's finally coming up Bella. Barty is similar in actively working for Voldemort's resurrection.

Lucius, meanwhile, lives in constant terror. Karkaroff desperately flees the country and hopes Tom will not find him. Snape, is in fact, Dumbledore's agent. Pettigrew only returned in utter desperation and has now cut off his own hand.

They're not the young men they were, some of them have families, to some of the past ten years have been utterly miserable. They have to watch as their children make the same damn mistakes they did, be sucked into this same hell hole, and there's nothing they can do about it.

There is a notable reluctance for the cause, and yet, they have to try with the same vigor or this madman will kill them all.

And it's all worthless anyway: come 1998, Voldemort dies again (perhaps for real this time, who knows, Harry Potter seems to think so for whatever reason) and then they are imprisoned for their acts as Death Eaters.

And they just laugh, because how badly Lucius wishes he could go back in time and tell his eighteen-year-old self, "YOU DUMB FUCK, LEAVE NOW!"

But Do They Learn Anything?

No.

Just because we see some of them regret being Death Eaters doesn't mean they regret their beliefs. Their beliefs were fine, even blowing up people here and there, a bit gauche but fine.

But maybe following Voldemort blindly was a bad idea.

Are They More Competent Than the Order?

No.

Tom Riddle is terrifyingly competent in that he infiltrates the government with ease, has spies everywhere, and all but proclaims himself minister one day and nobody blinks.

He gains the full support of most of the wizarding world's wealthiest and prestigious families.

But he doesn't actually give these people anything to do. Because there's nothing for them to do, with them, Tom's won. He owns the Wizengamot, the Ministry, everything.

There's no need to fight. It's over, there never was a war. Society is primed to accept Tom Riddle as their ruler.

However, the likes of Bellatrix LeStrange thinks there's a glorious war on, so "uh, go out and blow up a few muggles, have fun." And the young Death Eaters (and the older ones), think they've committed this great, daring, brave, and very important act.

Tom only seems to hand out real assignments when in desperate straits or else when being particularly vindictive.

Lucius, after messing up with the diary, is told to retrieve a prophecy he is not allowed to touch in a department of the ministry he should have no access to. If he fails: Tom kills his entire family. When Lucius does fail, Tom assigns his son to assassinate an already dying Dumbledore. These aren't real tasks, though they do have the appearance of one, and consequences for failure.

Barty, Tom is forced to rely on, as he is trapped in this dying infant's body. And better Barty, someone who is truly loyal and seems fairly clever, than Peter Pettigrew who is a miserable scum bag who'd sell his grandmother for a bar of soap.

Barty, of course, fucks this up. Rather than just kidnap Harry Potter at any of the many easy points this could be done (Hogsmeade trip, lure Harry out to Hogsmeade with super secret serial information about Voldemort/Snape being a Death Eater, etc.), Barty is determined to make use of the Triwizard Tournament to destroy his father's legacy.

This means rather than a few weeks, it takes months to kidnap Harry, and even then they bring along an extra boy who then gets killed and provides some evidence that Tom Riddle has in fact returned. (Somebody murdered Cedric). It takes months and Barty actively ensuring Harry makes it through the tournament and does well, leaving open the possibility that he might get caught helping Harry cheat at any moment. And of course, Barty has to pretend to be Madeye Moody for months, keeping his man locked and drugged in his trunk.

Thankfully, Moody's such a paranoid wreck, no one even notices.

Quirrell, Tom is forced to rely on. Quirrell fucks up, though admittedly not as badly as Barty. Quirrell fails to steal the stone when it's in transit/in Gringotts. He fails to murder Harry Potter, an eleven year old boy in the world's most dangerous school. He rouses Snape's suspicion almost immediately. Then of course he doesn't get the stone. He at least gets to the room with the stone and nearly overpowers Harry and gets it had he not been mysteriously lit on fire by the power of love/Lily Evans.

The only one Tom ever really relies on by choice is Snape. Snape is charged with spying on Dumbledore and later running Hogwarts (which he fucks up).

There is only one competent man in Britain: Severus Snape. Which is, of course, why he's a double agent that Dumbledore and Tom both extensively rely on despite his being a double agent.

There's no one else.

Tom Riddle doesn't make use of the Death Eaters but given they prove themselves enthusiastically incompetent at every turn I don't blame him. Just pretend to give them something to do and hope it makes them feel important.

That's all I've got in general, you want anything else you'll have to ask for something more specific.

[thesoulspulse]

Halloween In Amity Park

Ok so I know we still have 7 days left before October hits, but I just got this fun idea based off of this drawing: https://tourtheghostzone.tumblr.com/post/179609682886/happy-halloween-everyone-i-hope-you-all-have-a and really want to share it! Well, more than one actually!

To get things started let me share a few other thoughts first! So Halloween is probably a very interesting time of year in Amity Park because according to Jack in the episode we meet the Fright Knight for the first time “Fright Night” (who is one of my top favorite characters in the show btw) he says: “You know how ecto-storms always flare up around Halloween, Danny.”

In my mind translates to a supernatural phenomenon this time of year where natural ghost portals open more frequently thus there is a spike in ghost activity. That makes sense given what Halloween was originally...

“This day marked the end of summer and the harvest and the beginning of the dark, cold winter, a time of year that was often associated with human death. Celts believed that on the night before the new year, the boundary between the worlds of the living and the dead became blurred. On the night of October 31 they celebrated Samhain, when it was believed that the ghosts of the dead returned to earth.” (https://www.history.com/topics/halloween/history-of-halloween)

Long story short, originally people dressed up in costumes to conceal themselves from evil spirits. But, what if in Amity Park the ghosts started doing the opposite of that? Think about it, despite the dangers I doubt the citizens of Amity Park would want to cancel Halloween even though everyone knows ghosts are real now so the trick or treating, the dressing up in costumes, all of it would continue as normal with Jack and Maddie going out on patrol to help protect people. Bonus points if this is after they know Danny’s secret and it’s the one night he gets to take a break from ghost hunting ironically apart from Christmas thanks to the Christmas Truce.

While some ghosts still love to scare people obviously, during that time of year most ghosts treat Halloween as a game where whoever scares the most people wins but they’re not allowed to touch or hurt them -which is a fun idea I saw somewhere in the phandom so credit goes to whoever thought of that- so wouldn’t it be funny if a bunch of ghosts started to go around trick or treating while pretending to be in costume just to see if anyone catches on? In fact, some ghosts find it funny to discover that some people are even dressing up as them now!

For example, what if the Fright Knight himself with his “flaming bedsheets of death!” saw someone dressed up as him and the detail in their costume is so impressive -as in like cosplay levels of impressive- that the Spirit of Halloween himself can’t help but fly over and compliment their efforts on replicating his armor and Soul Shredder.

Fright Knight: You there, Mortal! I command you to halt!

Trick or Treater: *yelps and stands there frozen in place, legs trembling since he’s scared to death that he just pissed off the real deal with his costume or something.*

Fright Knight: *narrows his eyes darkly*

Trick or Treater: *still trying not to wet himself*

Fright Knight: *after a long pause* You honor me with your excellent costume, you may carry on and I will spare your life this night in recognition of your talented craftsmanship. *rides off on Nightmare.*

Trick or Treater: ...

Trick or Treater: *sinks to the ground, blinking*...what just happened?

Taking this idea further, I have this headcanon that the Fright Knight is also the Headless Horseman from the Sleepy Hollow myth so it would be fantastic if he decided for the sake of amusing himself by chasing people around like the good old days and dons his “old” appearance and rides through the streets cackling like a madman and letting loose in a way he hadn’t since Pariah Dark forced him into servant-hood. (https://vimeo.com/295398502)

“The Headless Horseman, sometimes known as the Galloping Hessian, is portrayed with a pumpkin (often a jack-o-lantern) while riding a black horse. The story goes that the Headless Horseman is the ghost of a Hessian soldier who was decapitated by canon fire during the Revolutionary War.” (https://www.wgpfoundation.org/historic-markers/headless-horseman/)

I even have my own version of the Fright Knight as the Headless Horseman!

Now to close things off here’s my final thought! In my mind, ghosts don’t always have to be dangerous I bet they enjoy free candy too!

Happy 7 Days Til October!

[kanmom51]

JM JK timeline.- my observations how they grew over the years

Disclaimer: these are my own opinions and conclusions.  Feel free to disagree, but hate or aggression will be unacceptable.

2017 - Part 3

Ooh, we have reached a major event here.  Serendipity. 4 September 2017, or is it 1 September 2017 (??), as I will explain bellow. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BEMaH9Sm3lQ&t=16s .  

Or what I like to call:  JM’s love ode to JK.

Now tell me this: If Jimin’s song Serendipity was released 4th September 2017, and uploaded to BangtanTv on 5th September 2017, why is the date stamped on the MV 1 Sep 2017? 

 Does that date mean something? Let me think for a second….oh, it does, doesn’t it?  It’s someone’s birthday !!!

JM tells us himself: “All of this isn’t just a coincidence”.

Serendipity is a beautiful love song, and I honestly believe it is JM’s love ode to JK, a birthday present to his love.  

I am aware that Jimin is not the one who wrote the lyrics for the song.  RM did though.  RM, that at this point was very much aware of the relationship and JM’s great love for JK. RM that had written JK’s Begin, a song that everyone agrees is a very personal song of JK’s.  

The “I am you, you are me” line actually originated from a song released by Zico in early 2016.  There are theories that Jikook used a reference from that songs MV (the band aids on their fingers) during a Puma fan sign on April 2nd 2016.  So, if this is true and the line had special meaning for them to start with, and it found it’s way into the song lyrics... feel free to make your conclusions...

And although we have no way of knowing just how involved JM was in the process of writing this song (did he ask for a love song? Did he give ideas to insert into the song, like destiny, not being a coincidence, the cat?), but at the end of the day, JM ‘owns’ the song, believes in what he is singing.  When he talks about the song you can feel the emotional personal connection he has with the song.  This is his song,  and he sings it for JK.  And JK knows this is Jimin’s gift to him.  

Serendipity related, check out the 18th September Dance with DNA Vlive -  https://www.vlive.tv/video/42069 .

JK’s reaction when JM says Serendipity is his favourite song.  So cute. The thing with this one is that you could easily overlook it or not read too much into it. Only Suga’s reaction here is the tell all.  

At the point that JK is acting all shy and smiley to himself, Suga moves closer to him, whispering “Jungkookah”, something that brings on a change to JK’s entire facial expression.  There’s even a slight head nod from Suga when JK wipes the smile off his face.  

Suga hinting to JK not to be so obvious, only made it more obvious.  I also noticed that just before JM starts singing Serendipity, just after he was asked what his favourite song from the album is, JK looks sideways to Suga, as if he knows he isn’t supposed to react too obviously – looks a bit like little JK might have been scolded or reigned in prior to the live broadcast.    Remember that this is really quite a short time after the song’s release, so JK’s excitement, happiness, is still really fresh.  The song is for him, and it’s JM’s favourite...

I am not going to analyse the MV, but there are many who have done so before me.  Was JM involved in the planning and did he have any input to the choices made?  Idk.  There is a similarity to the motif of the DNA MV. Is it a coincidence that the dominant colour used is JK’s favourite colour? Who knows. But doesn’t the song say “all of this is not a coincidence”?

Add to that JM starting to use the paw print emoji by JK’s name on Twitter?  A coincidence? Mmm… interesting.

From this point on it is clear that “you are me, I am you” is a JM and JK thing. 

21 September 2017 BTS comeback show.  JK was in charge of putting together each of the members DNA.  Very enjoyable.  But why did JM have to mention again that JK comes to their room to sleep?  Also, how does JK know that JM doesn’t wake up Hobi when he is playing games late at night?  JM telling us how he now learnt how to play games – then what games was JM good last year (re: Vlive 22 April 2017)?

22 September 2017 Love Yourself fan sign– JM singing Serendipity, JK joining in.  How happy JM looks when JK sings “just let me love you” with him all while making eye contact with each other at that point. The way JM looks at JK while singing the song.  Singing to him.  

Still think Serendipity is not JK and JM’s song?

They have a way of looking at one another that sometimes make me feel like I’m intruding on a very intimate moment.

24 September 2017 SBS Inkigayo Super concert – found it!!!  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fb-_jkdxgh4 start watching at 3.36min.

This is the one I remembered, where JM, saw the need to grab JK’s butt, run his hand up and down his back side, right through the crack, repeatedly. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v7fv0CaQT9M start watching 11:30min , JM walks to his place past JK, lightly brushing his hand against JK.  

When I mention the brushes or light touches – this is what I mean (see attached photos).   Obviously, there will be those who say it wasn’t intentional, that he was walking by him and didn’t mean to touch him.  I say bollox to that (excuse the language).  

First, there was plenty of room not to walk so close to JK.  Second, if you notice, he circles JK only to make it back to the same actual side he was on to begin with.  All he had to do was back up, just like JK did, and not circle JK to make it to his place on stage.  Third, to me it looks as if he was aiming to touch JK’s hand, only it was too high up.

26 September SBS MTV The Show.  Happy happy boys.  

30 September 2017  Love Yourself fan sign Sinchon –  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SMIdoK9rfAI .  

Another one I was looking for.  I have seen this moment and wasn’t sure where or when it was from.  This is one of those clips Jikook’s use to show Jimin being jealous, and to be honest, first time I saw it it made me wonder too.  But watching it again and again, I have come to the conclusion that that wasn’t the issue.  

To me this is more JM being protective than JM being Jealous.  Setting the boundaries for V when it comes to JK, and it is something we see with JM more than once.  

JM wasn’t happy.  V wasn’t happy.  Boundaries were set.  

I actually wrote a separate post about this moment.  

1 October 2017 BTS live – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qwU-NOMLvqQ 

Tipsy JK must be a Jikooker. His guard is down, inhibitions are gone and he becomes really chatty and tends to say and do things that he most likely regrets later on.  We didn’t see the members drink what seemed to be alcohol, but the vibe I got from JK’s talkativeness and behaviour during the live was that he was tipsy.  Not outright drunk, but tipsy.

To the fan’s request to show his abs, JK starts checking himself out, looking under his T-shirt, only to be scolded by JM to keep it to himself.  This is also the first time we hear him Jikooking, talking about eating with Jin and JM, referring to them as Jin-jikook, and then turning to JM, while the others try to call them by another name (I wonder why…).  Did I not say tipsy JK is a Jikooker???

3 October 2017 Run BTS episode 22.  https://www.vlive.tv/video/43438 start 7.00min.

JM turns to JK asking him to vote for him.  The softness in JM’s voice when he asks him acting all coquettish.  The way JM approached JK and the way he spoke to him, that’s not the way someone talks to his mate, or to his ‘brother’.

There was a softness in the approach to JK.  coquettish is the only way I can describe it.

 Love hearts were added by the show’s editors, not me !!!! 

12 October 2017 BTS countdown. Can be found on Dailymotion. 

All JM had to say was one word – Jungkookah and JK, surprisingly (not) chose him.  The look of joy on their faces at that point.  And again the editors with the heart emoji effects.  Uhm… 

JM and JK’s team was the team chosen by the fans, and guess what song they both choose to sing, as JM piggy backed JK? Their song obviously… Serendipity.  

And yet again, JM gets to tell us JK comes to his room to sleep.  We hear you JM.  We hear you.

Jimin birthday surprise (BangtanTV 1 November 2017) - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6aAhNAl53ZY.

JM gets flowers sent from his father.  J-Hope and Suga pretend JM’s dad has arrived to surprise JM, Suga pointing and saying he saw him.  JK slowly backs up, shocked and alarmed smile on his face, trying to move behind RM.  Then the boys start laughing.  

Now, why do I think this is a moment worthy of my timeline?  Well, when the boys start laughing, revealing it was a joke, the one Suga points at, laughingly, is JK.  

The whole thing feels like a joke on JK, not JM.  JK is the one being teased.   Why would JK be so stressed out from JM’s dad being there?  And why would the boys be teasing him like that? Hm…

The funny thing is that the camera is on JK and Suga, not on JM, who was supposedly just told his father was there. That feels slightly strange to me. Wouldn’t they want to catch JM’s reaction? Not JK’s?

28-30 October 2017 JK and JM Tokyo trip together.  This trip was long anticipated by JM.  He had been looking forward for his trip with JK for a long time.  It was a private trip planned and paid for by JK as a gift for JM.  What we know about the trip is mostly what they tell us in retrospect.  

Saying that, this was truly a memorable trip for them both, and they both can’t seem to shut up about it, talking about it at any possible moment.  JK telling us how JM stayed up (only JM?) until 5 am, so they both woke up at 12pm and missed out on plans they had for the morning, JM tells how they went shopping in Harajuku, how during their trip was the longest walk they took, referring to their trip during interviews.  As I mentioned – a memorable trip.  

31 October 2017 - When returning from the trip JM posts a selca/selfie.  I know I said I won’t be doing this, but rules are sometimes meant to be broken, and this specific selca is gorgeous, so…

BTS Wings tour Japan documentary - filmed October 2017, published 12 November 2017 - https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x7sz5rq .  

Both acting cute together. For some reason, they are the only ones that are paired for the one on one interviews, when Suga, Jin and Hobi were all interviewed by themselves. 

 Felt like JM and inhibitions were strangers during the group interview.  

Not really sure what JM was searching for in JK’s thigh during the group interview (when V was talking) – tupping, fingering and squeezing JK’s thigh.  And yet again RM and J-Hope’s reactions to die for.  Hobi eyes on the action throughout the whole episode, and RM when he notices, I would pay a lot of money to know what was going through his head at that point.  My educated guess is: “God, please get me out of here, why did I agree to be the leader????” LOL.

Then when asked what their impressions were when coming to the dome, JM tells how JK was crying, all while caressing JK’s ear.  JK tells how he was emotional, and they look at each other.  All the while, RM’s face when JM touches JK’s ear, only to continue to place his hands on their shoulders respectively.

JM continues to surprise, telling viewers to anticipate for JK’s sweat.  The minute he says that, RM turns to look towards Suga, the vibe I get is: “god, please help me here…”.  

Then JM goes on to tell us how in his opinion JK’s sweat is beautiful, Holy water.  What???? J-hope repeats JM’s Holy water, then glances for just a second towards RM and looks down nervously – great save Hobi.

The group interview was shot on JM’s birthday.  Maybe that had something to do with his good un-inhibited mood.

8 November 2017 – GCF in Tokyo - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XrTNLkqGrlc  .

While the Tokyo trip was JK’s birthday gift or JM.  GCF Tokyo is JK’s love ode to JM.  

One of JK’s grand gestures.  Up there with RB, as far as I am concerned.

This is not an analysis of GCFT, but I do have a few words to say on the matter. Explain why in my eyes this is a JK’s love ode to JM.  

This video was filmed and edited by JK, and JK alone.  It supposedly documents their trip together.  It was his choice and his alone to edit and publish this video and did so to JM’s surprise.  

In the video to start with, he lets us know that it’s the two of them, but from there on, other than seeing JK through the mirrors in the elevator while he is filming JM, the one we mostly see is JM.  JM smiling, JM goofing around, JM eating, JM enjoying himself on the Tea Cup ride at Disneyland, JM walking, JM dancing, and as a whole just JM having the time of his life. For a video that is documenting a trip to Tokyo, there is not too much of Tokyo we get to see.  

The end credits name JK as the photographer, director and editor, while naming JM as the actor.  

There is a strong romantic vibe to the video.  

JK’s editing choices, including his music choice for the video are well thought out.  His choice to edit to the beat of the song.  All cleverly thought out to accentuate both the footage and the lyrics of the song he chose:  ‘There for you’ by Troye Sivan and Martin Garrix.  

JM told us already: “this is not a coincidence”.  

The level of preparation from JK, acquiring the rights to use the song, the amount of time it took to go over the footage and edit the video, all while managing to do that will a full working schedule (working throughout the night). This was clearly something big for him.  His joy and pride when it was uploaded to Youtube, clearly showed, him smiley and dancing.

2 days prior to GCFT, on 6 November 2017, JM published his short clip of the trip.  JM too took the time to edit a cute footage of the trip, documenting both of them having fun. Putting them both side by side only emphasizes the difference and showcases just how much GCFT was all about JM, being JK’s love ode to JM.

To be continued...

[lyallblacklupin]

Sirius tries to remember Remus.

Post-Azkaban Wolfstar: Angst with Hopeful Ending.

Sirius is battling with his memory after Azkaban. 12 years of dementors torturing him, that had caused some real damages to his brain. He doesn���t remember people until they introduce themselves to him. Everyone is steering clear his way but Remus hasn’t given up on him yet.

These days are sickening. They make you feel so lonely and ugly. They tell you—no they scream at you that you don’t deserve anything. Know why? Because you don’t matter. You don’t exist. The most horrifying thing about those voices is that they can make you believe they are saying the truth. Like I did. And I still do, and believe me, it’s not good.

Life is just unfair is so easy to say, it’s just a slip of tongue as if you are consoling a group of people, like Madam Hooch used to when we would lose to Slytherins because they played dirty. However, realizing the fact how unfair life really is, is gut-wrenching. It forces you to become unlike yourself. It puts malevolent ideas in your head for the people who you love—or used to loved. I would go on and blame these walls, but then I’m questioning the universe that why did I have to be born here? The Grimmauld Place 12? And then I’m eventually answered; Life is unfair, you git, haven’t you get it yet?

The nights are terrible here, I hear Kreacher whispering to my charming mother’s portrait, I hear the floor creaking even though no one comes here, except they are invited by Dumbledore—which sounds weird because it’s my house but again, life is just unfair.

Right now, I’m struggling to sleep because there is a prickling fear sitting at the edges of my body. The fear of Dementors for taking the last of everything away.

I still have some good memories, like the one when James made me Harry’s Godfather. Harry’s big emerald eyes were streaming with fat tears until he was given into my arms. I can remember that I had gasped at the scene, and so did the others in the room.

“Oh Sirius! He was crying for like an hour! But he stops now!? I swear this is not a coincidence!” Lily said, but James had been quiet.

“Prongs?” No answer.

“Prongsie? Hey!” Because I caught him pressing his hand on his mouth forcefully, his face blotchy, and he didn’t stop sniffing. He was crying! “What? Like you—father and son both work alternatively? When Harry stops crying, he transfers his weeping mantra to you, and vice versa?”

“Shut up!” Before I said something, I let out an ‘oof’ because James shoved me in his embrace, sandwiching Harry in middle of the process. Harry was giggling with his tear-stained face. His laugh was like music to my ears. I didn’t mention that. I was in love with Harry. He felt like my own child. I never thought I’d feel this exuberance but there was, more than I expected. I was bad at displaying true affection in front of people, but I couldn’t help when Harry’s tiny and chubby hands brushed the collar of my jacket, utterly in awe with the feeling of material on his fingers, I completely forgot James was hugging me, and I managed to press a kiss on Harry’s cheek. He smelled like soft babies. I was in love with that scent. I wanted to hold him forever.

I can never forget that memory. It helps me cast a patronus. There is also something vague about that memory. There is someone too in the small crowd, behind me, other than James. I can remember there was the blonde girl, Mckinnon, and her best friend, Meadows-something. I struggle with names. Sometimes I forget—

“Sirius?”

—Remus’ name. I have to see or hear the person to see if I can remember.

“I’m in my room?” He calls me out every time for like the hundredth time he has found me in my bedroom, and yes, I am still in my bedroom. He won’t stop calling me out. Sometimes, he is very annoying.

“Oh yeah, Of course.” He appears at the doorway, leaning to his left, smiling weakly. He looks tired. He is short of breath. I want to give him a glass of water but my limbs are protesting.

“I could give you a glass of water, but I—just don’t feel like getting up.” I didn’t want to say that but I did because the expressions on Remus’ face are priceless. There is awkwardness written on his face with a hint of shock and sadness. There is nothing pretty about that, but it brings back an indistinct memory I enjoy that I cannot tell. I am disturbing. That’s another trait I have discovered about myself ever since I came back from Azkaban.

“No, it’s alright. I just had water. Not thirsty at all. I—umm…I brought you something.” He says, and then I notice a package in his hand.

“Hope it’s not something you and your werewolf buddies plays with.”

“Ha, no, I wish. But it’s something I needed to give you…from a very long time.” He comes and sits beside me. I had to sit up because I can’t let him touch me. I don’t know why but I am always scared of Remus Lupin, and it is my secret, “Here.” He gives me the package, and looks into my eyes. I try looking away but I couldn’t try harder.

“Happy Birthday.” He whispers, and it sends a shudder to my body. What is the date today?

I open the package, and there it is. A photo frame. It was a leather frame. Black. I am trying not to look at the picture so I distract myself by admiring the leather. And again, I remember Harry. But it is a forced visualization so it doesn’t last longer. I am very much aware of Remus’ presence. I am also getting short of breath now. I look at him and he is already staring at me. I smile at him, but he frowns. And then I frown, too. What is wrong? I saw his hand coming up near my face, and I bat away.

He is gawking at him with wide and horrified eyes, and a hurt expression.

“I—I’m sorry. I don’t…I just—I am sorry. I don’t want to hurt you.”

“I know you don’t. But you eventually do.” It doesn’t come out bitter. He is smiling at me, but he isn’t done talking, “Sirius, I want to talk. It is eating me alive. Sometimes, I don’t think I am left with much longer in me…But, hey,” He reaches out but stops immediately, “Please…I—I want to talk to you about…Everything or anything. We can talk about us?”

“Us?”

“Yeah…If you want to,”

“There is no Us, Remus.”

“There used to be.” I snort, but he is frowning. I hate his frowns. Why can’t he just smile like a normal person?

“Like what? Did we snog? Or shagged once or twice?” I can’t recall any heterosexual experience, so I can’t say I have never done anything with a guy.

“Sirius, was that picture not enough?” He said with such sadness. And then I look at the picture.

And then I see it. There is a younger version of Remus Lupin, wearing a giant grey jumper, sitting on a library’s table. How decent. There is someone in between his legs, standing before him. It is a dark-haired guy, wearing a Gryffindor tie on his hogwarts’ uniform. He has his hands wrapped around Remus’ torso. A thick curtain of his long hair is almost concealing the half of his face, considering how much it is already buried in Remus’ chest. He squeezes gleefully which causes the younger Remus to erupt with laughter. The scene goes back and forth. And then I spot two people sitting in far distance. They were unmistakably James and Lily. They are the only people I recognize. Those two are cackling because how stupidly romantic the two boys are acting against each other. The picture keeps playing, and I focus again on the couple in the spotlight, and I realize that little Remus is trying to press a kiss on the guy’s forehead but the other person doesn’t stand still, constantly whipped his long hair—and then I freeze all of a sudden. Because I see it. The grey eyes, the long hair, and especially the scar on the left wrist, which still glows sliver in the daylight when I secretly stand in the balcony.

“That is us.” It comes out of my mouth even though I never expect myself to say it.

“Yeah, you and me. We were not just each other’s quick snog, or shagging partner. We go way back, Padfoot. Longer than James and Lily.”

“I don’t remember you…” It comes out as a whimper. I feel stupid and vulnerable.

“I’m sorry, Sirius. I’m sorry for what I did. I never apologized about this…I wanted to—“

“I don’t remember you…”

“—but I never really got a chance. I’m sorry I thought you could betray the Potters. I’m sorry that I kept myself believing for twelve years that it was you. But I swear to Merlin, I never stopped loving you—“

“I don’t remember you, Remus…” But he is not listening.

“—I used to hate myself for this. I felt disgusting that I still loved you. And then I melted myself in filthy thoughts. No one was there to judge me. I used to picture you all the time, sitting on the sofa waiting for me to come back from the muggle job you hated. I used to see you laying on the bed in the night. I used to imagine myself cuddling up with you. And some days, it was so real that we used to talk till dawn. We used to watch the sunrise together. October 31st used to come and go by, and we pretended it was just another Halloween and you used to say ‘Moony, you hate Halloween because some people dress up as werewolves, and you don’t get to wear a costume!’—“

I stop saying anything. I cannot tell that I don’t remember him because I do. His hand accidently rubs shoulder, and I am suddenly yanked to my happiest memory—Harry’s beautiful hands reaching my jacket—and the ‘someone’ is not just someone who is behind me, rubbing my lower back and laying his head against mine, because it was him. It was Remus Lupin. It is still Remus Lupin, I want him to be.

I cannot tell that I don’t remember him because I am starting to…and it’s a start. He keeps telling me how he spent the last twelve years, so I listen to him because my years were not in an open cage just like his. It was scary to be locked up for years and never to see the people you love, but it must have been even scarier to be free for years and never see the people you love. Remus Lupin has suffered too, and I can’t help but be there for him. 

So as he keeps rambling his stories about his undying love for me, I slip into his space, and wrap my arms around his torso, like I had in the picture, and bury my face into his chest. He is not warmer as he must have been in that picture but it calms me down because his heart is beating against mine, and I am happy to have him alive with me.

Thanks for reading! Stay magical!

[adventuresindolls]

May Photo Challenge!!

Our next photo challenge, #Daisies and Daffodolls, will begin on May 1st! It’s a creative, for fun, non-competitive daily challenge for you to share pictures of your doll(s). There will be a new prompt each day, listed below to give you a month to prepare, and you can participate in as many or as few days as you’re interested in. There is no judgement whatsoever, so please share regardless of how complex your props are, and don’t worry about posting a prompt late.

First of all, thank you so much to @desertdollranch​ for helping with the prompts, especially those surrounding AG birthdays and holidays, and for getting this whole photo challenge thing started back in September! And a huge thank you to @lesbianelizabethcole​ for designing all 5 banners!

The ground rules are the same as in October and December, but I’ll reiterate them for anyone that might be new. Tag all of your prompt posts with #daisies and daffodolls - all three words, complete with spaces. This will allow us to better find and share each other’s posts. You can organize your own posts however you want, but I recommend including the day’s prompt somewhere for context. Also feel free to post on other social medias if you want.

This is not a competition, and there are no prizes, but it should be a lot of fun. Feel free to use any size and brand of doll that you have! American Girl is very popular on doll tumblr, but all other types are welcome as well, including both established (historical or modern) characters and OCs. This could range from 18-inch dolls to Barbies to handmade dolls or porcelain dolls or even paper dolls.

I’ll reblog this post weekly until the beginning of May, and then begin each week of May with the prompt list for that week. Please find a list of all prompts below the cut.

5/1: The first day of each photo challenge is traditionally for seasonal fashion. Does your doll have a favorite spring outfit? Is it cool and light, or are they still bundled in a sweater for the chilly mornings?

5/2: Spring is all about new beginnings. Is your doll learning a new skill or trying a new activity this spring? Or maybe they just met a new person who became important in their life?

5/3: Today is National Textiles Day. Kirsten’s friends gave her a quilt they made after she missed school to help her family. Does your doll have any clothes or other items that are handmade? If not, do they make any textile items themselves? This could be something sewn, knitted, crocheted, or quilted.

5/4: May the 4th be with you! Does your doll like Star Wars? Who is their favorite character? What about other stories? Pick a hero from any movie, show, or book that your doll loves and have them act out a scene as that character.

5/5: Friends are forever. Who are your doll’s closest friends and what do they do together? Maybe they like to play board games or go to the mall or play pretend. Or maybe your doll is planning something special for their friend.

5/6: As the weather gets warmer, it’s the perfect time to head outside. Does your doll play sports, or do they prefer casual games with their friends? Maybe they like picnics or quiet hikes through the woods.

5/7: Happy birthday, Maryellen! Maryellen often feels overlooked in her large family, and she works hard to stand out and show her unique personality. What makes your doll special and unique?

5/8: It’s career day! What does your doll want to do when they grow up? Show them dressed up for and/or acting out their dream job.

5/9: Happy Mother’s Day! Addy and her mother escaped to freedom together, Caroline’s mother ran a shipyard, and Kirsten’s mother encouraged her not to lose heart. Does your doll have a special bond with their mother? How do they celebrate Mother’s Day? If they don’t have a mother or don’t have a good relationship with her, consider today a free space to show us something you really want to but that isn’t included in these prompts.

5/10:  Bugs are everywhere! We might avoid some of them, but others are welcomed. Lightning bugs, ladybugs, bumble bees, and dragonflies are a few happy spring bugs. Show your doll doing something bug-themed. They might take a net out to catch bugs or draw a picture of a bug or hold a ladybug they found. Be creative!

5/11: Parties are always fun! Is your doll going to any birthday parties or sleepovers this spring? Maybe they’re attending a wedding or some other celebration? What are their favorite party activities?

5/12:  Spring weather can be a relief after the cold and darkness of winter. What is the weather like where your doll is? Foggy? Rainy? Bright and sunny? Show your doll interacting with their local spring weather.

5/13: Everyone needs mentors and heroes. Who does your doll look up to? What have they learned from them or how do they honor them?

5/14: It’s the last day of the school year. What’s your doll’s favorite extracurricular activity or aspect of school that they’ll miss until next fall?

5/15: Happy birthday, Luciana! Luciana loves learning about space and wants to be an astronaut and go to Mars one day. Getting to space involves studying many different things, particularly various fields of science. Show your doll doing something related to space or science.

5/16: Today is National Do Something Nice for your Neighbor Day. What does your doll do that helps others or makes the world a better place?

5/17: Let’s try something different today! If your (OC or non-AG) doll had their own American Girl-style book series, what would be the central theme? What sort of things would happen to them? Show us at least one scene from this hypothetical series.

5/18: Beaches and swimming are iconic activities as the weather gets warmer and people have more free time. Rebecca and her family went to Coney Island for a picnic. Does your doll enjoy picnics, sunbathing, or sandcastles on the beach? Maybe they like to swim for exercise or hang out at the pool with friends? (I do not recommend putting your doll in a public chlorine pool)

5/19: Happy Birthday, Kit! Growing up seeing the effects of the Great Depression on people around her, Kit is determined to report on important things happening to real people. How does your doll relate to current events? Are they involved in activism or spreading awareness? Is there an important social issue that affects them personally or that they feel is very important? Or is there something good happening in the world that they like to think about?

5/20: Spring is a great time for tea parties. What’s in your doll’s teacup? Maybe they’re drinking a fancy tea, or maybe they prefer a refreshing glass of juice.

5/21: Spring is full of baby animals. Show your doll interacting with some sort of baby animal. (Safely! Please don’t grab a real squirrel or bunny!)

5/22: In December we celebrated Pretend to be a Time Traveler Day. I’d like to reprise that, but with a twist: this time, we’re headed into the future! The amount of time and what your doll finds in the future is completely up to you. What do they do while there?

5/23: Cakes and pies and ice cream, oh my! What is your doll’s favorite dessert?

5/24: There may be fewer holidays in spring than in December, but that doesn’t mean there’s nothing to celebrate! Does your doll celebrate Passover or Easter? Or maybe they prefer a more obscure spring holiday to liven things up? Show them participating in whatever celebration you like.

5/25: Yellow is the color of flowers and sunny days and ducklings. Show your doll wearing or using something yellow.

5/26: Happy birthday, Samantha! After her birthday party, Samantha hears Aunt Cornelia speak at a suffragette meeting in New York City. What is a cause that is important to your doll? Show them with a sign supporting or protesting something close to their heart. As an added challenge, use a cause unrelated to the current events prompt.

5/27: It’s summer vacation! What are some of your doll’s favorite activities now that they’re free from school? Alternatively, what are some of their favorite hobbies to do anytime?

5/28: Happy birthday, Cecile! For her birthday, Cecile’s brother Armand gave her a beautiful porcelain doll that looked like her. Does your doll have a favorite doll or toy?

5/29: Late spring and early summer is a great time to go on a road trip or vacation. Where is your doll traveling to, and what are they doing there? Or maybe their family chose a staycation this year - what new fun new things are they discovering close to home?

5/30: Today is National Water a Flower Day. Show your doll interacting with flowers or other plants.

5/31: What is your doll planning for this fall? What are they looking forward to when school starts again? Is a big change approaching as the seasons and leaves turn? What does the future hold for them?