#like I'm trying to finalize things a little too early and it's increasing my work load by a lot

[lesbianpikachu]

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[1shirt2shirtredshirtdeadshirt]

Today on popping the corn and feeding the children, what do you folks think of this discussion? :)

I'm always curious to hear what other Trek fans, especially queer Trek fans, think about our place in Trek history and how we fare as the queer participants within our fandom. What have your experiences been like?

Overwhelmingly I've found a great reception and a welcoming attitude, but I admit that has increased considerably since the 90s. However, there are still some Trek fans who seem to be vehemently in denial about queer history in Star Trek, or the fact that anyone who has worked on Trek has pro-LGBT attitudes. This always surprises me considering some of the blatant queer content we have already seen in Star Trek such as the Jadzia Dax and Lenara Kahn kiss.

Anyway, I enjoyed the discussion that followed and seeing the overwhelming outpouring of support coming from Star Trek fans in response to this thread.

Here was my two cents contribution:

"No, what they said was factual.

Have you forgotten Nichelle Nichols was indeed an African American woman in the core seven bridge crew back in 1966?

Or the fact that Gene Roddenberry went out of his way to write The Motion Picture Novel, creating the term "T'hy'la: friend, brother, lover" so that fans could choose which interpretations of Kirk and Spock they saw fit? He also embraced K/S fans and hired a number of them to write the earliest Star Trek novels, including the very first official one (The New Voyages Vol. 1 & 2) which included slash fiction as well as Gene's approval/forward in the books.

In case anyone has forgotten, here's a little bit of background on Gene Roddenberry and his perspectives on queerness in Star Trek.

He admitted that in his early life he was very affected by how society and culture treated the LGBT community, and that he too found himself subjugating and judging others for that lifestyle because it was what people did at that time. As he got older and had more life experience, he began working with a number of queer artists in Hollywood -- and through TOS, a number of queer individuals began asking questions about Kirk and Spock.

Instead of vehemently shutting down this perspective, Roddenberry was intrigued, and saw potential to tap into a large audience (LGBT) that most others didn't want to go near or acknowledge publicity-wise. He saw it as an opportunity to expand the fanbase while also pushing yet another envelope.

But with the heat already on the show for what they'd already pushed, he found he was often stuck between what he'd like to do and what production would let him get away with. There are a number of Kirk and Spock scenes in scripts that got cut out for leaning a little too obviously romantic. Tiny trickles of that content still made it in were infamous moments like the backrub scene in Shore Leave. Even the 2009 movie had a K/S moment while Spock Prime and Kelvin Spock talked that was written and filmed that was cut out of the final product.

Queer subtext and coding has always been relentlessly weeded away at with an excuse ready to go for why they always try to cut us out, but we all know it's because they are scared of the homophobic backlash and ratings hits. Look how violently homophobes went after the gay romance episode of The Last of Us **just this year**. This has always been our reality, so for someone like Roddenberry to make efforts in the 70s? That was massive.

But Gene as well as the queer/slash Trek community managed to accomplish some things in the 70s which I'm surprised more folks don't talk about or give much credit.

In the same TMP novel which features "T'hy'la" and the famous footnote, Gene cleverly wrote Kirk with a bisexual/pansexual lens: Kirk describes himself as *preferring* women but being open to "physical love in **any** of its many Earthly, alien, and mixed forms." (Direct quote from Genes book). Basically, Captain Kirk was DTF with whoever if there was a connection, which was a very progressive take for a character in a novel written in 1979, but made sense for the future which would have a lot less hang ups about sex and love compared to our current rather puritan/conservative society.

I also prefer women, but I married a man. Shout out to Gene Roddenberry for giving us a seat at the table back in the 70's when folks *still* try to insist there is no place for K/S or queer concepts in Trek, because he made efforts -- however small -- to employ queer people and show queer perspectives. According to David Gerrold, LGBT+ representation was a big thing that Gene personally pushed for in TNG and wanted various depictions of love/couples in the Risa scenes, to name one example.

In the 70s, fanzines led to meetings and swapped fanmade magazines, which got so big that they needed hotel centers, then convention centers, then one day the TOS cast came to one and what we know as modern fan conventions were born -- inspiring even George Lucas who attended Trek conventions in the 70s and saw how popular Trek was in syndication; it was a great climate to launch his Space Opera. Star Wars then became so huge that we got TMP.

But none of that would have happened without the level of organization, passion, and creativity that those fans poured into Star Trek and their characters after it got cancelled and went into syndication.

Without queer folks we wouldn't have George Takei, Theodore Sturgeon who gave us Tribbles, Bill Theiss and his amazing TOS costumes, Mike Minor's art direction, Merritt Butrick, David Gerrold (writer for TOS, TAS, TNG) to name a few of many queer contributors to Trek that Roddenberry respected and tried to go to bat for wherever he could in a climate that was absolutely impossible to gain an inch in.

At a time during the 70s and 80s when so many people resented and feared the queer community and wanted us to disappear, especially in the 80s during the AIDS epidemic which many homophobes claimed was "God's punishment to the gay community" or "Gods's answer" to our "hedonism", thinking we'd gotten our just desserts and should just disappear . . .

During that time, Gene Roddenberry gave us queer folks a place to say: "You know what? Sure. Write your stories. TV says you guys shouldn't exist, they pull books with queer people off the shelves and burn them. Laws exist specifically to forbid you guys from loving each other, and call you mentally ill. You can't even hold hands in public. But I'm going to validate you guys and invite you to write novels or work for me, try to see what we can get by production, and allow you to see yourselves in my characters if you want to. There's a place for you in our fandom."

He gave us bi/pan Kirk, he gave us K/S is open to interpretation. In Phase 2 Kirk's surviving nephew Peter, son of his brother Sam from Operation: Annihilate!, was going to be written as gay and living on the Enterprise with his partner -- that also got chopped and reworked into a script that wouldn't get used until decades later. That was huge at a time that being queer was officially listed as a mental illness, and villainized due to the AIDS crisis.

So before you try to dismiss or tell K/S + queer Trek fans whether or not they deserve a seat at the table, remember that Gene Roddenberry was among the **first** to pull that seat out for us in a climate that was ruthlessly against LGBT+ folks." -- 1Shirt2ShirtRedShirtDeadShirt

P.S: Have some cute bisexual/pansexual K/S pride gifs. :) Pride month is a hop, skip and a jump away.

LLAP!🖖💚

[blakeswritingimagines]

The Room Where It Happens

Summary: Marrying such a sweet girl who did nothing but try to please Aemond in everyday possible seemed easy until the prince laid his eye on you.

Word count: 4.3k

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the House of The Dragon/Fire & Blood characters nor do I claim to own them. I do not own any of the images used nor do I claim to own them.

Iris had woken up early doing her best to make everything easy for Aemond once he woke up, hoping that this made him happy since neither of them seemed to find an easy groove yet in this marriage of only a few months. Putting off trying for children until they both felt like they knew each other a little bit better as Iris remained unaware of him seeing you and going so far as to even lay with you instead. Smiling when Aemond finally awake as Iris stood up straighter hoping she wouldn't make a fool of herself but watched as he slowly started moving around getting ready for the day "Hello my love, I've already prepped your favorite things for the day." Iris could see a frown on Aemond's lips as he slowly sat up in his bed. His wife would often smile at him as she woke up before him, trying to make his mornings more pleasant. She always attempted to do things for him to make his day easier. Aemond appreciated her efforts, but he couldn't help but think about the night before. "I'm not hungry," Aemond said in a flat tone before turning away from Iris. He stared out the window for a moment before turning back towards her, his frown increasing. "You didn't have to be so attentive." He took a seat and poured himself a cup of Arbor Gold. "How much longer do you plan on trying to make yourself indispensable?"

Iris looked hurt by her husband's words. She had been trying so hard to make him happy, hoping that he would be content with her. She loved him, and all she wanted was for him to feel the same way about her. She reached for the bottle of wine on the table and poured herself a glass, taking a long drink before she spoke in a hurt tone. "Why shouldn't I try to be the best wife I can be? Is that not what you want?" Iris said, her eyebrows raised in confusion. Aemond looked up at Iris, his expression neutral as he took in her words. He could see the pain in his wife's eyes, and it pained him to see her upset. Despite not being overly affectionate, Aemond did have real feelings for Iris and it hurt him to see her hurt. "Iris, you're a great wife," Aemond said softly, his tone softening. "There's nothing wrong with you… It's not you, I just-" He trailed off, looking up at his wife. His voice was filled with uncertainty.

Iris looked down into her glass of wine, fighting back tears of disappointment. She took another drink from the bottle, as her husband was quiet with his words, feeling that she was failing him when all she wanted was to make him happy. She wasn't used to these feelings of guilt, and not knowing how to make everything better. She turned back to him, waiting for him to continue speaking. "You just what, my lord?" She asked, tilting her head slightly. Iris sat in silence for a moment, processing what her husband had said to her. Aemond sounded as if he was trying to find an explanation for his behavior, but it wasn't helping to alleviate the confusion Iris felt. "What is it then, Aemond?" Iris asked softly, looking at her husband with a concerned expression. She wanted her husband to be happy, and she wanted to better understand his feelings. "Are you unhappy with me?" It was difficult to hide the desperation in her voice.

Aemond sighed deeply and looked away. The guilt was clear on his face, and he could tell by looking at Iris that she suspected something was wrong. He thought about lying to Iris, telling her that he felt under the weather, but he knew that wouldn't work. Iris was too smart and too persistent. "Iris, I-" Aemond started, but he stopped midway through. He couldn't continue. He didn't want to hurt Iris, but he didn't see any other choice. After a few moments of silence, he took a deep breath and spoke. "I'm not unhappy with you," Aemond spoke slowly, knowing that his wife would sense any lies within his words. Aemond wanted to be honest with Iris, his expression turning somber as he tried to figure out exactly what he wanted to say. He couldn't let her believe that it was her fault, though. That would crush her. Iris watched Aemond as he walked away from her and out of the room with a troubled expression and tears in her eyes. For the first time, her husband seemed to be hiding something from her, and that made Iris feel even more worried about the future of their marriage. She took another drink of wine and tried to clear her mind. For now, she needed to wait for Aemond to come back, but when he did, she would demand that he tell her the truth, even if it hurt.

Several hours passed, and Iris was still in their room, sitting by their window and drinking wine. Her mind was filled with questions, worries, and fears, but she refused to let herself cry. She was angry with Aemond for not telling her the truth, and she refused to let him see how vulnerable she truly was. As the day went on and Iris continued to wait for her husband's return, she slowly grew more anxious with each passing minute. She wanted to see Aemond, to have a chance to ask him what was going on and why he was lying to her. You had been going about your business happily during the day even when Aemond pulled you away, having been calming him down from when he spoke to his wife earlier nearly spilling about you two seeing each other behind your back. Kissing his neck softly as you ran your fingers through his long white hair as your free hand rubbed smooth circles on his chest while keeping your tone gentle in his ear "It's fine, she doesn't know and there's no real harm being done is there?".

Aemond sighed as your fingers ran gently over him, slowly relaxing in your embrace as you gently kissed his neck and rubbed your fingers across his chest. He had been trying to avoid you ever since his conversation with Iris at the start of the morning, but something about it all felt right to him. The two people in his life were both beautiful and sweet in different ways, but you had a fire inside you that Aemond found alluring and enticing. He had made a mistake when he denied you, he knew now. Aemond enjoyed your touch, especially as you spoke in his ear. His eyes drifted shut. "No," Aemond said softly, "there's no real harm being done." He sighed quietly. "You're right, she doesn't know." Speaking with you behind Iris's back felt wrong, but he didn't regret it. He still wasn't in love with Iris, and he didn't want to waste her time with false affection. You smiled as you felt Aemond relaxing, your fingers gliding gently across him. The sight of his chest was so attractive to you as you started to kiss along it, your touch becoming a bit firmer as your passion began to ignite once more. A low groan left his mouth and you laughed. “I think I like it when you make that sound.” You were being daring yet you knew you both were safe at the moment as you were in your own shared chamber which was secure. You enjoyed being close to him more than anything and you wouldn’t hesitate to show it again either.

The feel of your fingers along his chest and the sound of your laughter filled Aemond with desire as his mind slowly grew foggy. He could feel your hands moving lower and lower along his flesh, and he couldn't help but let out a moan at the sensation. He was a married man and he knew what he was doing was wrong, but his urges were overwhelming. "Darling," Aemond said, his voice filled with need. "I need you." You smiled and looked at him deeply in the eyes as your hands moved lower, slowly and gently yet firmly. Your eyes were filled with passion, as you took in the sight of him. He was yours now. Just like that. “I can feel the want within you, my Lord. Are you sure you want this?” You whispered seductively into his ear, your voice low and tempting as your lips came closer to his neck. It was time now. Aemond felt the heat rising in his body as your hands drifted lower and lower. As your soft, feminine fingers gently explored his flesh, his body grew tense as he resisted the urge to let his desires take control. Aemond felt as though he was being pulled in two different directions, but he felt the urge to surrender growing every second. He could feel your breath against his neck as you whispered your words into his ear, his senses being overwhelmed by your sensual embrace. His body gave in as his thoughts were taken over by lust.

He wanted this more than he had ever wanted anything in his entire life. He was no longer sure of what he wanted with Iris, but he was completely certain about what he wanted now. He needed to have you, and he wasn't going to stop until he had you. "I want you," Aemond said. "I need you." You were filled with passion, as your hands started to reach their final destination, pressing against him feeling his cock hardening by your feather-light touch alone. His voice and words filled you with anticipation and desire, as you looked at him and whispered seductively. “Then let me take you, Lord Aemond. Only I can fulfill your needs now….” your words and voice were sweet and seductive, yet it also held this teasing quality as you spoke, and as your fingers moved. Aemond sighed as his head was hazy and his body felt like it was burning with desire. He wanted nothing more than for your lips and touch to take him to the stars. He could hear nothing but your breathing and his own heart in his ears as he looked up at you, his eyes filled wit need. "Y/N…" Aemond breathed before reaching up, pulling you lower and lower towards him. He desperately wanted to take you right then and there.

You were fully filled with desire, and you could feel the excitement rising up within you. You had never felt anything like this, and you knew that Aemond was the only one you wanted. With a devilish smile on your face, you slowly moved to take a seat on his lap slowly moving against his hips with your own. “My Lord, tell me what you want from me…” you whispered seductively, as your eyes looked at Aemond with a seductive and lustful gaze. Aemond could feel his heart pounding in his chest as you moved closer to him. His voice was filled with lust as he looked down at you and let out a ragged breath. He loved to see your face when you were like this, when your eyes were filled with desire and your lips were begging for his. He was completely in your control and he craved nothing more than to make you feel the same way. "I want you… All of you." He breathed. "Your mouth, your touch, your heat…"

Looking at your lover with seductive eyes, as a devilish smile took shape on your lips. You slowly leaned forward, and your lips met in a passionate and lustful kiss. You had never desired anyone like this in your life, and it thrilled you. You wanted Aemond completely and utterly, for him to have you completely and utterly. You began to move against him slowly and gently as your hands started tugging off each other's clothes, your lips never leaving his as your body came to a halt onto his. Aemond’s words made your heart fill with excitement and desire. You moved your lips even closer to his as you slowly pulled away, your breath felt hot against his skin and his words filled you with desire. Aemond’s voice had this lustful and seductive tone to it and your body was getting hot. You knew what he wanted and you could hear the desperation in his voice. “Shall I…?” you raised an eyebrow as you moved your body slightly, pressing up against him once more. Aemond sighed into the kiss, his senses completely reeling as your touch sent shivers down his spine and caused him to shiver with desire. The sound of your breathing and the feel of your soft lips pressed against his were intoxicating to him. He felt as if you were the only two people in the world, and the way your body moved against him only further filled him with lust and desire for you. "Yes," he breathed as your lips parted for a moment. "Give me all of you."

You pulled away, smiling at Aemond's words as you put a hand on his cheek, gently caressing him. You looked at him and whispered seductively as your other hand reached down grabbing his hard leaking cock. “And I shall, Aemond…” Your voice was sweet and inviting, while your actions and words were filled with lust and desire. You were going to turn his world upside down if this is what it meant to make your dreams come true. You wanted all of him. You sighed and kissed his neck, as you slowly started to move your body against his sinking down as his cock bottomed out. Your movements were slow and sensual, as you kissed his neck repeatedly, feeling his breath on your neck as his hands moved to your back. There was something about him being close like this, the sensation being so intense, and yet it felt so normal at the same time as you both had been like this so many times before. After a while, your movements started to pick up slowly, your voice whispering seductively to him. “Take me.”

Aemond felt his body go numb as your voice and touch sent him into a world of pleasure. His eyes filled with lust and his lips parted from yours as he panted. You were already taking him, he knew that, but the words sent chills down his spine and made his muscles twitch and convulse. His heart was beating out of his chest by now, and he was completely incapable of uttering another word as you took his cock like he craved to be taken. His hands moved to your hips and firmly grasped onto them, holding you close to him as he helped you move faster. Aemond sighed deeply as his head fell back as he let you take control. For a moment he forgot about everything around him as his mind and body were completely consumed by the pleasure you were offering him. This was what he had always wanted, and now that he was getting it, he couldn't believe that he had denied himself for so long when you were right here waiting for him. Aemond took your hands and pulled you closer to him as he rolled over in the bed, his grip tight as he trusted his hips harder moving deeper inside of you.

You smiled as Aemond’s grip tightened on your hips, and you slowly moved with him, looking at him with those devilish eyes as he took control for once. You were always in control of him, but it felt good to be powerless for once as if you were the one waiting for him to take the initiative. “Aemond, my love.” You breathed into his ear in a heavy and lustful voice. “Mine.” You said in a low voice, still moaning as you began to move against him faster feeling him hit all the right places. Your lips met his once again, as you kissed, feeling his tongue invade your mouth, and your own moving seductively against his. There was no need for words, this had become your own language long ago. Aemond's grip increased and he moved one of his hands to your head, pulling you closer to him as he kissed you back. There was a hunger in his actions, a desperate need to have you in every way he could have you. He slowly pushed his tongue into your mouth, his lips moving against yours as his other hand caressed your leg enjoying the feeling of your soft skin under his calloused hand. The taste of you was like heaven to Aemond that no Sept could ever give him, and the feel of you against him sent shockwaves running through his body. He wanted this to never end.

Moaning against Aemond, your body started to move against him faster, your hands exploring his torso and arms as you kissed him passionately, the desire filling you and taking away any other thought of yours than just him. You felt him kissing your lips, and your neck, slowly traveling further down to your nipples as he nipped and sucked giving you the attention you deserved, making your body shiver in sweet anticipation. You couldn’t think when your tongues kissed each other, and you could feel every single touch of his as you moved against him. There was just him, and nothing more, and this was all you wanted. Aemond moved his free hand down to just over your hips squeezing roughly as he continued to kiss you, feeling the intensity grow with each passing moment. He could feel your hands running along his chest and arms, and his mind started to fog as he began to lose control. He would have you here and now, and he wasn't going to let anything stop him. "I need you," he said in between kisses. "I want you, and I love you."

Aemond's arms shook as he held your body close to his own with a groan. Every sensation he felt at this moment was overwhelming and he felt almost dizzy as he felt your body move against him taking him deeper as you met his thrust. He was so consumed by you that he couldn't think clearly anymore, every thought of his was gone and replaced by a deep thirst for you as he nipped at your skin marking you as his own. This moment felt more important than anything else in the world and he couldn't believe that he had ever thought he would be happier with Iris. You couldn’t talk as you were caught in the wave of pleasure Aemond made you feel, your mind hazy in lust. You bit your lower lip, trying to compose yourself for a few moments but it proved impossible this time. You started moving against him once again with a loud moan, making your breath go heavy and fast. You were so close to cumming, and you wanted him to be as well. “Aemond….” You whispered seductively into his ear. Aemond moaned as he could feel himself getting closer, his breath growing shallow as he gasped for air in between each exhale. His back arched upwards and his hands tightened their hold on your legs before placing them on his shoulders. He felt as if nothing in the world mattered except for this moment. Aemond moaned loudly and his entire body tightened as he reached the height of his pleasure. He couldn't think or speak, his body overcome by feeling. He could feel himself getting closer for minutes now, but the satisfaction was finally there as he came inside of you only to keep thrusting as he pushed his cum deeper into you.

You felt Aemond’s body tightening under your fingertips and his breathing getting fast as he panted in your ear. His sounds were enough to put you on the edge as well, your breathing getting heavy and your heartbeat going more quickly in your chest. Aemond’s grip tightened on your legs and you could feel yourself getting closer, as your body shuddered in pleasure. The moment became more euphoric than anything else you had ever experienced, and your mind was taken away. “Aemond….” You muttered, your voice was faint and soft. You couldn’t hold for much longer. You sighed softly and rolled against him, completely catching your breath after the intense moment. Your own body was tingling with pleasure and your mind had been taken away with the rush of emotions. You were so glad to be able to share this experience with Aemond, and you hoped you were able to satisfy him as much as he was able to do that with you. You started to kiss him once more, your lips kissing all over his face. “You were fantastic.” You whispered with a tired but satisfied voice, as you pressed your body tightly against his.

Your body started to relax slowly as the euphoria slowly started to fade away. Aemond’s touch felt so sweet even after the release, as your body slowly turned back to normal. You breathed heavily and slowly opened your eyes, looking at Aemond with those half-lidded eyes. “Aemond…." You whispered gently, still wanting to feel his touch on your body. But you felt the warmth inside as the euphoria slowly faded, even though you couldn’t deny that what you just did felt like heaven. Aemond slowly sat himself up as his breathing turned back to normal, his body slowly starting to relax in the aftermath of what had just been done. As he looked at you, he couldn't help but feel the desire rising up in him again as he took in your half-lidded eyes. It felt like heaven to see you like this, your hair all messy and your body covered in sweat. He couldn't deny how good it felt, and the way you sighed his name was enough to set him off again. You looked at him with those seductive eyes of yours, your lips curling up in a teasing smile. With a playful tone as you spoke, "You’re just going to leave me like this? How cruel of you" You had moved down towards Aemond, and you started to kiss his chest again, your lips still swollen and your body still feeling the aftershocks as you looked at Aemond with that devilish look of yours once again.

Aemond growled as you moved down to his chest once again, your touch sending shivers down his spine. He felt your lips against him once more and his breath caught in the back of his throat. Your voice sent a shiver down his back, your playful tone and seductive look filling him with lust. "Why are you doing this to me?" Aemond gasped as he moved closer toward you. "You know what you're doing to me." "Want to know what I do know?" You smiled teasingly up at him as you started to kiss his chest again, your lips slowly gliding across his body. Your voice was sweet yet teasing, your entire attitude right now was devilish and playful, and you loved playing with Aemond and teasing him. You were going to make him beg for more and it was exciting and satisfying for you to see a prince do such things just to make you happy even as you spoke again. "That Iris will never compare to me….Will she?". Aemond groaned as you kissed his body once again, your words filling his body with pleasure. There was no way that Iris could compare to you, not after this or any time he snuck off to see you. Aemond couldn't believe that he had thought for so long that his wife was the best he could get. There was no hope for his marriage now that he knew he could have this. Aemond's voice was heavy and desperate as he spoke. "You have ruined me."

"Oh, have I now?" You smirked as you continued to kiss lower down his body, your voice playful and filled with desire. Your touch was light, but it felt like fire to Aemond’s skin. He was getting closer to release the more you touched him, and you knew it. You whispered seductively "How does it feel, Prince Aemond? Knowing that no other woman but me can make you feel this way? Knowing that I have so much power over you?". Aemond groaned as your words sent chills down his spine. There was no hope for him now, he couldn't go back to Iris. How could he look at her knowing what real desire felt like? Aemond couldn't even remember the last time he had felt anything like this with his wife, and your question only made it all the more real. "Better than anything…" Aemond whispered as your lips continued to glide over his body teasing him. The feeling was beyond words and he was desperate to feel more.

At that moment, You had the upper hand and savored it then made Aemond beg for more. You slowly looked up at him, smiling sweetly as you saw the effect you had on him, slowly moving your mouth towards his neck and kissing him there. If you continued like that for a bit longer, he wouldn’t be able to hold for too long. "I have all the power over you, my love, so tell me…" You whispered softly. "What are you willing to do for me?". Aemond moaned as your lips found his neck, his eyes quickly shutting tight in pleasure. He felt like he was on fire, and he couldn't think straight anymore. Everything he had known about his marriage was thrown out the window as you continued to kiss him and decorate his pale skin with marks, your voice sending his blood racing through his veins. Your hold over him was complete and you could feel it almost physically. Aemond breathed deeply and slowly opened his eyes again, his voice low and husky as it responded to your words.

"Anything."

[dee-in-the-box]

so. thought a little too hard about my headcanons for Dsaf 3. and now i'm a bit sad. so now y'all get some!

Jack listening to Henry's tapes and getting about...five more reasons to want to tear that man to shreds. at lest three of them involved Dave. the other two involve Dee and himself.

Dee first coming out of her box in The Flipside looking like the Puppet, but then shifting into looking like herself again when she sees Jack. and then shifting into the Puppet again when the fight starts. just. my Dee shapeshifting headcanon <3 (basically, after she died, Dee could shift her ghostly appearance into being either the Puppet or a ghostly version of herself)

Jack looking at Blackjack and just seeing a younger version of himself, frozen in time. this young man in his early twenties, his whole life ahead of him, who had all of that ripped away from him cruelly. his sister. his brother. himself. all by the same man. reduced to a snarling ball of rage, who wants nothing more than to rip Henry to shreds where he stands. the only reason he hasn't done so is because he's been convinced that doing so won't truly set him free. when Fredbear told Jack that, despite the souls desiring vengeance, killing their killer would not set them free, Blackjack took that to mean that it wouldn't set him free either. he's been stewing in his rage and grief for decades, neither feeling ever subsiding in that time. if anything, his rage has only increased. he lost everything because of Henry. why wouldn't he be angry? and so, if everyone else must move on, and leave him there to guard Henry and make sure he doesn't cause any problems, alone, then he will.

Jack finally helping to set him free, looking his younger self in the eyes and saying maybe that means that killing Henry is the one thing that will set him free. and even if it isn't...well, he needs to be dealt with, anyway. what if he gets out and causes problems again? just...Jack looking at Blackjack and feeling both like he's looking at a window into the past, yet also like he's looking at a different person entirely. because he and Blackjack are separate people, technically. but it's also him looking at himself.

Jack holding Dave's hand as they confront Henry, and squeezing it a little bit reassuringly. Dave tightening his grip as he gets more stressed.

Peter's death in the Henry fight being the thing that makes Jack say that their anger pushes them harder, and Dee's death leading to the line "We're gonna fuckin' FLAY you alive, Henry!" from Jack...like. just imagine how enraged he probably sounded, seeing Dee go down again. do you think it reminded him of the day she died? the day he went back to the diner to find her and bring her home, only for him to keep calling out for her and looking for her as the horror dawned on him that he couldn't find her? do you think that's what was running through his mind?

Jack and Dave reaching the end, and jack admitting that he can't go with them. Blackjack interjecting that...there is something they can try. no guarantee that it'll work, but it's worth a shot. Blackjack can try to fuse back together with him; not necessarily the same thing as shoving someone's soul back into their body, which is a big no no, apparently, but maybe a piece of him will break off, and it'll become Jack's soul. maybe them fusing will trick the universe into thinking Jack has a soul. who knows, but hopefully it'll work. and it does. Jack, by some miracle, gets his own soul out of this in a way that'll allow Blackjack to still exist. he also gets Free Afterlife Top Surgery™, because at this point he deserves it. he's been through so much shit.

at the end of the fire, Jack just looks at Dave and Blackjack and says "Come on, guys. Let's go home."

i just. aaaaaaAAAAAAAAA-

also, some Afterlife headcanons for y'all:

Peter: "Jackie, with all due respect, you have the weirdest taste in men." Jack just hanging out with Dave in the corner: "Peter, wtf-"

Steven just immediately laid down on the floor of the Afterlife and slept for a while. he was. So Fucking Tired.

Jack: "Okay, therapy circle time-" Dave: "Absolutely not, we don't have time to unpack all that." Jack: "Dave, we have nothing BUT time to unpack all of that-"

Peter and Caroline reunion <3

[the-monkey-ruler]

why is meihouwang 6 ears ur bias?

Bias? Like why he's a favorite?

Well I really enjoy him! I do love Xiao Shihou a bit more in the series cause he has a special place in my heart for me but I really love how they did Liu’Er in the series as well! Not only is his design super interesting and iconic but something about the changing of his looks when how his mental state is just always making me love a character more!

The thing I think Mei Hou Wang made Liu’Er such a well-defined character, giving so much time to build Liu’Er's personality and even his own relations to other characters! Liu’Er clearly was more of a daredevil himself at the start of the series, willing to do outrageous stunts for fun and it's clear that he is close to the Monkey Elders of the troop, already taking missions with them. But most important is how he regards Monkey King Yeye and how has nothing but respect for him. He never wants to question Monkey Yeye and is always seen at his side as a loyal helper (COUGH son COUGH). He has a strong sense of justice, wanting to help others that have helped him, being the first and ONLY person (besides Monkey Yeye) to be on Shihou's side at the start when he was being considered an outsider because he was saved by him, even unintentionally! He is quick with a plan and cautious but he can be too quick to run or too quick to jump in but he his heart is in a good place. They gave him a lot of time to set up his character in the start and it just creates the foundation of what he goes through afterwards!

Kinda spoilers.

What matters is that the series gave him his own agency early at the start when he starts to feel slighted by the attention that Xiao Shihou is getting. He got his first taste of recognition when he brought back the Rishi plant even though he tried to explain that it was Xiao Shihou, he found that he didn't really want to lose that admiration. He loved it! And as time goes on as he sees Xiao Shihou being the one to save people from his increased strength and quick thinking he starts to let those feelings of envy fester. And the audience sees that kinda fall of him feeling both insecure about his place in the troop and starting to take risks himself. He is the one to try to take on Havoc alone and the only one that stood up for HIM was Xiao Shihou! Shihou agrees that it is risky but he fundamentally supports Liu’Er the entire time! He is more than ready to go out and fight Havoc alongside Liu’Er even if the risks are high. And he doesn't hesitate for a second when he hears that Ginseng Fruit and Yutu are in trouble!

And in the end, while it was Liu’Er's idea to go in it was Xiao Shihou that took down Havoc and set fire to the cave. And Liu’Er, while he did want to take down Haovc, still wanted that recognition for being the one to set up the plan. He wanted fame and glory as well. And he wanted to be king. Because to him, being king means that he could finally be the person that everyone looks up to, just like how he looks up to Monkey Yeye. Despite going on mission at such a young age (he is like the only teen there with only little kids and adults) he isn't given the respect he deserves or at least wants.

But he wasn't chosen by his Yeye. Instead, he was passed over to his best friend. The guy that has saved him time and time again and always stood up for him and never doubted him for a second. And yes Monkey Yeye never SAID it was going to be Liu’Er and even SAID that if there was anyone that could save their troop he would make THEM king. There was never a lineage or promise or anything to be had beforehand but like... IT WAS IMPLIED with how much Liu’Er spent at Monkey Yeye's side and always trying to help. He did come off a bit as too much as a yes man, which is why I'm sure that Monkey Yeye thought it was best to go with someone more strong-willed and not afraid to speak his mind for the troop, but he still bit in a lot of work nonetheless. He even was trained with Monkey Yeye's weapon! He trained with him!

More spoilers

At this point the audience understands where Liu’Er is coming from as no one likes being passed over, even if Xiao Shihou was the one to do more work, Liu’Er's feelings of being looked over are still very real. But him starting to show how Xiao Shihou wouldn't be a good king and pointing out his flaws to bring him down is where it hits harder. He is angry and lashes out at the one causing his anger, his best friend. Calls him hot-headed and temperamental when Shihou was the one following HIS plans. The BETRAYAL on Shihou's face and he doesn't UNDERSTAND why his best friend is saying these things. He doesn't know what he did wrong when he was trying to help and he WAS helping, he was the one that made Liu’Er's plan work and they saved their troop. But Liu’Er wanted to be the one to get the credit while Shihou would have to look up to him for once. Despite Shihou also being the one to risk his life again and again like Liu’Er, Liu’Er thinks that he was the one who should be rewarded. And maybe Liu’Er could have had a point about Shihou not being fit to be king as he is more impulsive but at that point he would have to point the finger at himself as well because he also jumps the gun.

Xiao Shihou leaves the island with them still at odds and THEY CUT OUT SCENES of them having a final goodbye because YOU CAN SEE IT IN THE CREDITS! And what I wouldn't have given to know what they said to each other.

And from there the audience SEES his fall when being manipulated by White Deer. He lost his best friend the one to always save him and now it reads as more tragic as more time goes on. He is filled with promises by this stranger that takes advantage of his insecurities and he isolates himself from any support group he could have had. He starts to throw himself into his training for the sake of defeating Shihou in battle and he pushes himself to his limits. He doesn't even know at this point that White Deer wants Wukong dead, just that he is training for when Wukong comes back. At this point, he just wants to get strong to prove himself worthy of admiration like Wukong and prove that he can be more than just dead weight. I think he got a lot of that insecurity from being kidnapped so much and it is always Wukong saving him. he is always being saved by Wukong but he is never the one to be strong enough to save himself.

It gets only worse when he starts to hear the Nine Spirit Lion in his mind, poisoning him even further with promises of power. He denies it at first, trying to block out the whispers of a great demon trying to use him. But in his greatest moment of weakness, when he dares to sit on the throne and imagine what it was like to be king is when he is caught and ridiculed. The Marshalls and Generals that once praised him and his efforts were looking down on him for his dreams and ambitions, pointing out how arrogant he is to think he would be king when he is already doubting his self-worth. I don't think Liu’Er was in the right trying to take the throne but I don't think that the Elders were right to try to reprimand Liu’Er not for his attitude but rather for his boasting. He falls into a state of depression after being laughed at, losing more and more of himself as he doesn't want to feel this pain. How he would rather feel nothing than feel more of this pain and rejection. And he gives in to those promises of taking away the pain. He starts to lose more and more of himself, literally having his emotions cut off by a demon because he couldn't bear to burden the feelings of isolation by himself.

He only gets worse when Wukong comes back, he sees him for the first time and puts on the mask that things are back to normal and everything is okay. Liu’Er tries to attack him but EVEN IN HIS SLEEP, Wukong can just brush off his attacks! Liu’Er is desperate to do something...

But Wukong just OFFERS to teach Liu’Er everything he knows. Just wants to help his friend in what he thought was a bonding moment between the two because he has missed his best friend so much and wants to reconnect with him. But the more he learned the wider he sees the gap is between them. The more his resentment builds.

And then Grandpa Yeye dies.

Wukong tried to go to HELL to get him back and Liu’Er closed off his emotions (Not really healthy on either side) but while Wukong got closure by talking to Monkey Yeye before he was reborn, Liu’Er gave into the demon's promise to cut off ALL his emotions. The demon promise to make the pain go away and Liu’Er gave in. He couldn't handle the grief of losing his ONLY family he considers he has left. How he lost the last person he wanted validation from and comfort and the only person that was on his side.

Liu’Er starts to be monstrous, attacking Wukong and trying to kill him at this point. He says how he knows that in his mind they grew up together and how they were best friends but how Wukong has becomes the source of his suffering and that if Wukong was gone maybe he could bear to feel again. He accepts the Nine Spirits Lion to consume him completely.

It becomes clear that he never wanted to be king for the sake of being the island's protector, but rather so he can finally that validation he was searching for his whole life. Yes, he is the antagonist of the story be we see his rise and fall and how he became those villains from giving in to his negative thoughts to blaming others, to even being taken advantage of by far stronger demons.

It ends with a climactic battle and Wukong is HORRIFIED that his best friend, the one person he thought that was also supporting him, like how Wukong supported him was actually his enemy. The heartbreak he sees when Liu’Er has completely lost himself in vengeance and anger and has lost who he is just for the sake of seeing Wukong fall with him. How Wukong never say it coming because he never doubted Liu’Er for a second. However, then Wukong wished he could have seen the signs, that maybe he could have done something different but Liu’Er was already lost in himself. Feeling like he isn't even himself anymore but just a shadow of who he used to be in order to gain power. Even the demon that consumed him admits he was his second choice, and that he much rather would have Wukong as his prey. Like... dude.

But never does Wukong gives up on him!

Every minute the Nine Spirits Lion says that he has already killed Liu’Er, Wukong is too determined and too stubborn to believe it! Even when Liu’Er pushes him away Wukong knows that his friend is still in there and he isn't going to let some JACKASS take advantage of his friend like that. Wukong never gave up on saving Liu’Er, not then and not now.

And in the end, Liu’Er was able to be freed from the demon's control. He regained his emotions, his thoughts, and his own body and he was ashamed of how he acted, taking the blame that this mess was all his fault. But Wukong was just happy that his friend was alive and freed.

I WISH there was a longer ending scene of the two talking about what happened. About their grief over Monkey Yeye. About what happened after Wukong left and how Liu’Er started to lose himself more and more. While Wukong gained more friends Liu’Er only had people that wanted to use him.

Anyone what I'm trying to say is that not only do I love Wukong and Liu’Er in this series but I love the plot behind it as well! I love the characters and the whole idea and while it isn't perfect, it always has a special place in my heart.

[ghostoffuturespast]

22 March 2024 - Friday Field Notes

Rabbitbrush (top), Spring Mountain Parsley (bottom left), Fringed Sage (bottom right)

The Spring Equinox was earlier this week and while the calendars might say it's spring, some days it doesn't necessarily feel like it. The prairie is beautiful, but it's a harsh place to live sometimes. There is limited water and the climate alternates frequently between extremes. So even though the calendars say spring, the prairie is slow to wake up. The patient sort, the prairie knows to wait.

Most people might think it's too early to start even thinking about gardening, but that depends on the types of plants you're planting. Many domesticated garden varieties of plants and agricultural crops have been selectively breed to reduce seed dormancy for human benefit. The seeds from domesticated plants germinate more readily and more consistently than their wild cousins. Which makes them easier to grow, harvest, and eat, but because of that they require a lot more babying and care. Wild plants are much tougher.

Seeds are living organisms, the offspring of plants, and they contain everything a seedling needs so it can germinate and grow. Wild seeds are incredibly patient, they will wait months, sometimes years, before they will even consider growing. Some have armor so thick that it has to be chipped away at by rocks and ice, freeze and thaw cycles, before water and air can even get to the seed. Others contain acids and hormones that have to be used up between specific temperature ranges before they'll even think about sprouting. While others, not fully developed, are knocked off the fronds and petals of their parents, children that brave the elements and just prefer to wait and see. Wild seeds do not rely on a calendar, because they know and can feel when it is truly spring. When it is safe for them to finally venture out into the world and grow.

I have no idea if this Rocky Mountain Bee Plant that I planted will grow this season. It's suggested to do fall plantings so it'll overwinter. It has a very thick and tough seed coat. I'm hoping the abrading I did and the snow might help it along a little. If not, it'll be a surprise for next year.

A couple of Pronghorn lads enjoying the trail.

CW: dead animal, road kill below cut

This Beaver was hit by a car trying to cross the road. Underneath the road there is a storm drain that connects a retention pond and feeds into the creek at the site that I work at. The storm drain is grated off, to help improve the flow of water and to make sure detritus doesn't get stuck in the channel, which increases the chances of flooding. Because this Beaver was trying to follow the water and because the drain was grated off, they had no choice but to cross the heavily trafficked road. It's unfortunate that urban infrastructure often does not consider the needs of all living things. Grating off that storm drain means no wildlife can use it as safe passage.

I salvaged the tail from this Beaver for educational purposes for work, the rest them was too far gone to keep, so my coworker and I moved them off the road and onto the shoulder a safe distance away from any cars.

Most likely this Beaver will first become food for scavengers, Coyotes and Corvids, before it starts to decompose. Insects will lay their eggs on its rotting flesh so their larvae will have something to eat, perhaps the fur will become a part of someones nest, and then the bones will bleach. Crumble to dust and return to the soil to feed the billions of microorganisms beneath. It will help the plants grow. Maybe some day, it might even help another Beaver live.

It's sad this Beaver died, but in nature nothing is wasted and nothing is forgotten. Life and death are so inextricably linked and one does not exist without the other.

And heck, maybe that Beaver tail I kept might inspire a future engineer. Help them build a better and more compassionate storm drain.

[superemeralds]

How do you tend to go about writing fanfiction? Like do you have a lot of outline or any other interesting things about your processed you could share?

my process is kinda all over the place, just like my brain haha. what i do to help myself not get lost in all that is having a strict rule where before i start writing teh actual prose, i need to have at least a bulletpoint outline of the major events that need to happen in the story. this helps me know what i'm working towards, instead of being lost and eventually paralyzed when I run out of ideas of how to proceed OR (and that happens way more often than having no ideas) i have TOO MANY ideas and i can't decide where to go.

for my black arms maria fic for example i had a rough outline that looked a little like this: (under cut for spoilers, click here if u want to read it first; warning for body horror and blood and gross things (tho very mild if im honest))

5 chapters, each about a stage of a star CH1: how maria gets to go on the ark, roots of her issues, basically where the seeds are sown for the inevitable explosion in the end, how the aliens come into play CH2: the introduction of shadow and the black arms DNA, maria's loathing, innocent little girl corruption arc, she pushes shadow away VS he is taken away and she wants him back, her mental state starts to crack CH3: how it came to the ark raid: maria hides her mutations, parallels to her relationship with shadow, her mental state corrupting with the mutaions, "bloody nose" by the used, black arms hivemind link: black doom talks to her, superiority inferiority complex: she plans to kill shadow CH4: her alone with her mutations, many years spent plotting, biolizard, how gerald is involved and how it fits into sa2 plot CH5: sa2 rewritten to fit the premise, lots of shadows perspective

(as u see i have mentioned a song; making a playlist also helps me a ton bc i vibe a lot to music and it inspires me a lot! It helps that i naturally always arrange playlists in chronological order of a story...)

after i have somehting like that i can start doing more detailed outlines. i dont have the ones for the early chapters anymore but this is what ch4 looked like (i use colored text to make it stand out next to written paragraphs that i will do right above the notes):

This chapter maria wakes up and realizes shes not dead.  shes in despair, trying to move but she CANT. at least not much. the stress knocking her out for a few months. she can at least crawl closer to the core reactor. spends 7 years just lying there and regenerating > when she finally can get up she frantically looks for info on the ark. and gerald and shadow (After a few months she finally managed to find a rhythm for physical activity in between studying notes and files, and heading to the dark chamber for a new lizard's tail. Her condition improved with more nutrition, but she did feel herself becoming unstable, nose bleeds increased.

[Maria gets visions of black arms as she mutates more and more] she trashes the place Her hivemind link is what makes her grow increasingly craving murder and total destruction. I mean she already does bc of finding out dirty dirty secrets about the ark it just increases to 9000)

(She starts growing a long tail and she despairs when she sees herself in the mirror, looking exactly as she saw in her vision years and years ago, turning into the monster she feared (She plots her ultimate plan. Understanding how the ark works, how chaos energy works. Finishing the eclipse canon. [Thinking about how to get shadow to do what she wants. Knowing he was in cryo shortly after his trauma it would be impossible to reason with him, not immediately at least. Not if it was her. Knowing she herself was deeply fueled by rage, hatred, disappointment and despair…. The same emotions would fuel shadow greatly. She saw what he was capable of, she knew what *she* was capable of. Geralds message would only need slight alterations since her own plans came pretty close (???) Some boffoon that shared their family name was wreaking havok on the planet, trying to turn it into metal. She had to admit it was a more noble plan of destruction than her own. (???) Maybe. Cut? When gerald is interogated by gun on the weapon he made bc they found it, he puts on a show, saying shadow is dangerous and needs to be contained. He is the only one who knows how to, before it is too late. This is how shadow ends up in cryo and why the password is maria. Why would gun use maria as password like cmon. Anyway this is also how he smuggled a small video into shadows pod where when he wakes up he will be introduced to the plan. During his execution he choses his last words carefully, leaving an encoded message for maria when she wakes up. Maria, at first, doesn't get the code. Shes just confused and spends a long while just learning more abt the ark. But ahe watches the video often just to have like. Company? She herself grows more and more angry with everything so when she notices the code and learns abt the plan. Shes on board. Sure. Lets fucking go. ] she studies the ark, she studies geralds notes on shadow, she studies all data on black arms she can get her hands on all while doing that she STILL gets that stupid dream. she still gets visions, especially when reading their language She makes her plans to kill the world. chapter ends with her sending eggman an encoded message that he won’t be able to resist cracking

as u can tell not all of it made it into the chapter but that was just me thinking "aloud" about all the stuff that had to do w the chapters main premise. the original outline was short and vague enough to give me freedom to think but constricted enough to not let me wander off into making up completely random new stuff!

idk if this helps, but this is how i write nowadays and it works well for me :] im finally finishing things instead of abandoning them!

[afniel]

Not gonna tack onto it because I do understand where they're coming from and I don't want to derail because for a lot of people it is that way, but...I really don't experience 'this writing must be done now because I hate looking at it.' I just don't. I can keep editing because I love it but what if I loved it a little more? What if the cadence was even better after one more rearrangement? What if I could set the mood more vividly still? Could I possibly tighten the pacing more when things start moving? I could sit there fiddling endlessly because I do love my writing and I want it to be the best I can make it.

And then when I finally stamp something as Good Enough To Post, it's not because I'm done looking at it forever and want to never see it again. It's because I legitimately think it's good and that other people might enjoy it too. Like, I actually like my writing. I don't think that's weird! Why would I keep doing something that I hate doing and don't even enjoy the results? I reread my own stuff sometimes and go, ah! This was better than I remembered! Good work, past me!

This reminds me so much of like, the early days of DeviantArt where if you do much as implied that you liked something you had produced you'd get instantly cut off at the knees by a bunch of people ready to tear you down in ugly jealousy. You really in some circles kind of had to post everything with a detailed list of what was wrong with it and an apology for making anybody look at it, otherwise ooooh look at the fucking snob, they're not even that good, what gives them the right to have such an overinflated ego? And people internalized that. I did, for years. I forgot what was good about my visual art because I ended up trained to only ever see it as never good enough to be happy with it, and honestly it set me back years in my progress. I thought by being harsh on myself, I'd improve, but I just started hating what I did instead and that isn't productive.

Like, whatever you're creating, who cares if it's objectively good or not? Objectively good isn't a real thing anyway. Make things you enjoy making. Try to make things you enjoy seeing. I do understand it doesn't always turn out, but that's not a failure, that's a practice run, no big deal. If working in the 'uuuggghhh if I have to look at this any longer I'll scream, take it away' paradigm works for you, cool, I'm not the boss of you and don't want to be, but I cannot function like that. I've spent way too much energy becoming myself to spend any more of it on self-loathing. If I made a thing, hell yes, I have increased the number of things in the world by one, and I'm proud of that.

[arcplaysgames]

god i can't believe i only have 30 images. tumblr please just increase my image limit specifically and give me, like, 50. i'm dying.

There's zero chance there isn't going to be a two-parter.

Shido's Palace is the Diet Building, but it is a cruise ship that is gliding through a world already lost. Shido's perception of the world is that everything is already a lost cause and all he's concerned with is personal survival in luxury.

So he's your average billionaire, trying to build a lifeboat for himself and personally selecting the people he will allow to leave with him from his desperate sycophants.

For what I think is the first time, the Palace is regularly interrupted by little asides, back to Akechi in the real world.

No no that's flippant. Akechi is a fundamentally broken person. Like, the way he connect to people is by making himself necessary and that is it. He is the Black Mask

(which: the game reveals he's Black Mask in a little bit but I thought this was confirmed by Futaba's wiretapping, like, hours ago, but everyone acts shocked? eh whatever)

and has been doing the mental shutdown killings for Shido for years.

Anyway, while he's on air with the TV crew, someone innocuously mentions a phone, and he starts to remember Sae and the phone, and starts to suspect something's up.

A little bit later, Shido asks him to go on clean-up, taking out all remaining people he thinks might even possibly betray Shido. Akechi points out that uuuuuh why tf are we doing this now, it's really suspicious? why not wait until after the election?

So Shido is feeling extra paranoid. Akechi gets nervous about wtf might be happening.

Nice of you to drop in, Beige Boy.

Akechi figured out that the Thieves are infiltrating Shido's Palace and shows up to finally have a long-overdue mental breakdown at everyone.

yeah for real, you clearly needed someone to grab you by the back of your stupid hair and shake you until you decided not to murder people for your biological dad

OH YEAH, SHIDO IS AKECHI'S FATHER. which, okay, I didn't call that one at all. I was wondering why he had such a specific hate-on for Shido and that certainly explains it, but also wow they look nothing alike and Akechi really didn't even hint at that. Go fucking figure.

But if Shido's right and Akechi started volunteering to do this work in the Metaverse for him 2.5 years ago, that was right after/around Wakaba Isshiki's death. How the fuck did Akechi get into the Metaverse to begin with?

I'm fucking thrilled to bits that Akechi's plan all along was to kill Shido. I want that so bad for him honestly. It'd be mad sexy of him if he managed it.

Alas, Akechi is fully fracturing and goes off on the Thieves, deciding if he can finally kill them, his plan can still work.

AKECHI HAS MULTIPLE PERSONAS

AKECHI HAS THE WILD CARD ABILITY

HAS AKECHI MET NOTIGOR

Also his innate ability is to drive people insane with his persona. He demonstrates on two shadows, siccing them on the party. He's been using that on other people too, causes the psychotic episodes in the background of the game.

Bruh, wow. You are just the actual antagonist of this tale, huh?

Like, I really really wish Persona pulled a really rabbit out of the hat here. I can see how close they got to something fucking magical. Spend all this time building up Shido, do everything the same as if he were going to be the final boss...

then have Akechi step in, kill Shido, and take over as the True Villain of the game.

THAT WOULD HAVE FUCKING RIPPED, and justified all the effort put into building up Akechi. MAN.

But anyway.

Kismesissitude, folks.

GOD BLESS THEM THEY FUCKING TRY

THEY REALLY TRY

Akechi, I think Reverie was into your weird homoerotic rivalry thing from pretty early, if you just said, "Hey, want to make out and do some knifeplay" he would have been down. This was all you, buddy!

Again: easy to be flippant, but it's clear that Akechi has never once had a person he could rely on, and so has never learned the basic skills of how to rely on other people, and that isolation is his undoing. No matter how powerful you are singularly, people can still party up and take you down like a raid boss at the end of the day. You can't kill Reverie faster than Mona and Ann can Diarahan him.

"Dude, please, just chill. You are super going through it right now and we all say shit we don't mean when we're having a meltdown."

Alas, Akechi will not chill. he has a deficit of chill.

[xamaxenta]

i had to wake up early today for work too and really ddint want to get up so in solidarity heres the mas thoughts ive been having (i think because of you?? idr)

vamp sabo and ace living together as a roommate situation and sabo refusing to bite ace right?? so ace wonders into the magic part of town (accidentally on purpose) to ask advice on "how to get my vampire boyfriend to bite me" and shit. wanders into a wb owned shop and like gets to talking and theyre like ?? a human why do u want to be bitten and shit

and then hes like complaining destressing about how hes been walking around half naked and baring his neck and his obviously hungry and wants it bf just!! wont bite!! him!!!!!

anyways wb pirates are a mix of magical creatures but the only vamp among them is marco and hes like hmm tell me more. even better if ace has a relationship with the whitebeards and hangs out with them sometimes but they never knew about sabo and he finally broke cuz he needs advice

but then sabo finds him and equivalent of scruffs his neck like "this is so dangerous what are you /doing/" as if wb hadnt been trying to recruit ace for years (That is Exactly why it is dangerous u fckn idiot -sabo probably)

and then like thralls ace to sleep and ready to like skedaddle but instead gets pinned against a wall by marco like "Haven't met you before, Ace seems enamoured."

"So?" and tries to scramble away but just gets pinned harder

"You obviously care for him, why not give in to his wants and take a bite? it won't kill him." as if he didnt know, ace must have told them how sabo was too scared of accidentally hurting him permanently.

As if Sabo could barely keep from draining him on a good day. His brow twitches

"I'm not going to hurt him." he says simply, but Marco won't let it go presses in harder, makes Sabo feel light and woozy.

"When were you turned? Your instincts seem too strong for how controlled you seem to be."

Usually, Sabo would tell him to fuck off, he did damn well good controlling his instincts, even when he woke up injured and angry and bloodthirsty and alone.

Instead, he gasps, Marco's touch feeling like tendrils on his skin, mind clouded, "Almost a year now."

Marco's brow raises.

"Without a sire?" because there was no way a vampire would leave his newly turned unattended this early on.

Sabo growls, thinks about those monsters, tries to pull himself out of the fog Marco has surrounded him with, with little luck. Finds himself answering instead, eyes watering from the attempt.

"I don't need one," he answers, squirming, "The one who turned me was a celestial dragon, and left me for dead."

"You have amazing willpower," Marco praises, "To resist me for so long. And so young too, poor thing."

The pity scratches Sabo the wrong way, but Marco's eyes show mirth, and that's the only thing that stops Sabo from truly fighting back. The pity was a tease, and Ace liked these people. Forced himself into calm and Marco laughed.

"I see. You handle yourself well," a hand cups his cheek, the smile on Marco's face creasing his eyes, so kind it sours, "But It'd be far easier for you to navigate this with a sire."

The pressure seems to increase pressing into the creases of his mind, makes him gasp and arch into Marco the fucker, so hard to keep his wits about him when Marco's voice was so prevalent.

"I'll be kind," he says.

A sire, it'd certainly make things easier, but he refused to be tied down, controlled, made into something he wasn't, made to do things he didn't want-

"I won't be chained," Sabo answers, too slowly, like wading through mud.

"You're a good kid. It'll keep both you and Ace safe," Marco coos, "It won't be long before vampire hunters are on your trail, one mistake, and they'll treat you like a feral," he strokes Sabo's face again, so gentle it burns, "Not to mention when Ace awakens, halfs are hated by both worlds, you'd do well to listen to your elders."

"Ace..." he trails off, to keep Ace safe, he'd do anything. It'd been the thing that kept him going half-starved and mad with it. He couldn't hurt Ace, had to push through, had to, "It'll protect Ace?"

He felt like he was drowning, Marco's words echoing in his head, drowzy and knees weak.

"Yes," he chuckles, "I should've known Ace was your weakness," he says, "I can't imagine how hard it was to turn alone, it will be easier, I'll guide you. I'm not a cruel man."

Marco, he'd heard of him before, vicious and territorial and terrifying in the fact he didn't belong to a coven but to the Whitebeards. Powerful and old, but not cruel.

The distinction soothed the last doubt in his mind and he allowed himself to fully give in to the thrall, if only for Ace. It was a lost cause, his struggle, he'd been worrying about falling to his baser instincts for months now, or of attracting unwanted attention from humans and vampires alike, with how unaware of the rules and customs he was and with how hungry he always was, like a gaping maw in his chest.

He tilted his neck in submission, eyes closed, and the only thing holding him up being Marco's grip, he felt so tired, so /weak/.

"Good boy."

And then fangs on his neck, a needle like pinch, making his eyes widen as Marco /drinks/.

His body relaxes even further into it, Marco's powers soothing him, hand rubbing circles into his side. Ends up passing out.

Wakes up hungry, eyes wide, energy thrumming through him. Marco sits reading, and turns his head up when he hears the sheets rustle, glasses low on his nose.

"Finally awake?" he says, "Come here."

Sabo would've done that if he ordered it or not, finds himself climbing into the older man's lap with something close to desperation, wanting so badly to /bite/ he could barely think. But he couldn't, wasn't supposed to, and it's with great willpower he grits his teeth and lofts his head where he had been breathing way too hard into the crook of Marco's neck. He needed to get away before he-

But then Marco's hand landed on the back of his head, pushing him back down, making Sabo panic and cry out. But he couldn't resist, not when he was so close, not when he was so desperate.

"Good boy," Marco soothes when Sabo bites down, "There's no need to resist me"

and thats all i wrote but then sabo and marco fuck and marco convinces sabo its ok to feed from ace he'll even supervise if it makes sabo feel better and cradles them both when it happens, petting through sabos hair and then yknow mas.

i really hope tumblr doesnt eat this i wrote it in the ask box djdjdj

Im speechless i was like heehee vampire stuff sounds so fun today but i actually dunno anything about them and their lore and you come here and go hello hello i have you and ur dumbass covered LET ME FILL IN THE BLANKS AND IM SO GRATEFUL

The LORE FOR MARCO ALONE IS SO GOOD needing a sire? sabo being left alone after being turned? Ace being enamoured with Sabo?

Sabo resisting Marco but Marco securing his consent and loyalty because of Ace and because Sabo loves Ace and he wants to keep him safe AUAGSH and Marco becoming his sire and yeah they totally fuck n then Marco supervising Sabo when he finally bites Ace the first time 🥺 cute!!!

this

Absolutely slaps like bro youre cooking this is so damn good i have nothing to add im glad i said something this morning if it had you come here to write this im really thankful thank you for sharing this with me

[masterjedilenawrites]

Hey there! I absolurely love your stuff and I was wondering if you'd be willing to do something with Thorn, maybe with " why is it so damn difficult for you to believe you're worthy of love? "? I just really need the love from my favorite underrated boi 🥺 However if you can't it's totally okay ❤❤

Thornnnn! I think I made myself fall in love with him while writing this 🥰 lol

Commander Thorn x reader | 1.2k words

Content: Hurt/comfort, reader has some self-image issues, but Thorn is a lovesick puppy and so very comforting

It was no secret how enamored Thorn was with you. He practically sung your praises with wide, adoring eyes every time you were together. You hadn't minded in the early days of your relationship; in fact, you'd eaten it up. You'd been starved of attention for a while until then. You had such few friends and your family was... well, out of the picture. So to have a new boyfriend - dashing and sincere - pay you compliments? It'd been quite the treat.

But his admiration seemed to only increase, in both frequency and complexity. One day you were gorgeous, the next you were a breathtaking wonder. One day you had lips playfully pecking the blush on your cheeks, and the next he was fervently breathing in every inch of you as if you were the all air he needed to exist.

It was too much.

You felt yourself growing apprehensive toward his affections. Finding ways to keep yourself too busy to properly see him. Hanging up the phone before he could squeeze in any parting praises. And when that still didn't seem to do the trick, when he continued to find ways to devote himself to you, you started rehearsing a breakup speech in the shower.

You just couldn't enjoy his attention, not when you so deeply believed you were not worthy of it. Those nice little butterflies you'd felt in the beginning had only represented a moment of eager ignorance. For a brief time, you'd forgotten your flaws, all the reasons why you didn't deserve to be loved. And that was okay, you supposed. It was a needed reprieve. But now you were over-indulging. Now it was selfish and wrong. You were taking too much. It wasn't fair to him, for such a good, passionate person to be misled like this. Maybe one day he'd wake up and recognize the mistake on his own. But you couldn't let any more time pass. You would save him from the pain.

You would set him free.

Thorn's confusion was palpable as you went through your practiced speech. Wide, unblinking eyes. Tense jaw and careful breathing. He clung to every word you said and you could almost see the wheels turning in his mind, working over-time to dissect and analyze and comprehend their meaning. The air in the room felt thicker, dense with shock and woe. You gulped, preparing for your final statement.

"I know you don't understand right now," you said with your eyes trained on his chest, just beneath his stare. "But soon you'll see. You'll be grateful you didn't waste any more time."

"Waste?" Thorn finally found his voice, almost choking out the word. "You think... that's what this has been? A waste of time?"

You were hoping you could slip away while he was still dumbfounded, but alas, you'd have to try going off script. With luck, you could still keep your own emotions together for it.

"You deserve so much more, Thorn. I'm not going to be the one to keep holding you back."

The man seemed to snap out of his tense revere, his head shaking in denial while his fists clenched and unclenched sporadically. "Sweetheart... wha... I don't... what are you even saying? How could you think that?"

"It's the truth. You are so good, and strong, and noble, and just... wonderful. You need to be with someone who can be all of those things for you, too."

"But you are--"

"I'm not, Thorn." You could feel your throat restrict. You needed to get away before you made an even bigger mess.

Thorn must have sensed you about to retreat as he rushed forward and grabbed your shoulders, desperately saying your name to get you to look at him. "I have not been wasting my time with you, sweetheart. I love you. Okay? I love you."

"No." It was too much. You squeezed your eyes shut, as if the act of no longer seeing him would make this all disappear. "You need to love someone else. Someone better."

His hands released your shoulders suddenly. You opened your eyes just in time to see him do a little spin.

"Why is it so damn difficult for you to believe you're worthy of love?"

Thorn never got angry with you. And it wasn't that he was yelling at you now. He was frustrated, exasperated, and the feeling was forcing its way out of him.

Now it was your turn to be stunned and he took in the sight of your frozen form for a moment before he finally sighed and ran a hand across his face. He was trying to get control of himself again, but you could tell his heart was still racing and his eyes were still full of desperation to stop you from leaving.

"Do you think I'm stupid?" he finally asked. It wasn't the kind of question you'd expected. You gulped and shook your head.

"You think I'm a liar?"

"No..." you whispered.

"I have poor judgment?"

"Of course not..."

"I'm not trustworthy?"

You paused and finally brought your eyes up to meet his. "I trust you."

He held your gaze for a while, his features growing soft, forgetting the previous outburst of frustration. Finally he took a careful step forward.

"Then... you should believe me," he emphasized every word, "when I say you are worthy of my love. Right?"

You took in a shaky breath, unable to bashfully look away this time.

"Right?" he asked again, bringing up a hand to gently cup your face. "If you trust me, if you think I'm smart enough to figure out good people from bad ones, if you believe all these things about me, then you have to believe I'm not blindly or... or... foolishly mistaking you for someone you're not. I'm making a choice here, sweetheart. I'm choosing to love you."

You weren't sure at what point the tears had started falling down your cheeks. Thorn swept them up as quickly as they came with his thumb, until soon there was too much to stop. His other arm wound around and brought you toward him, toward his calm warmth. You weren't sobbing, but you let the tears run down in quiet streams and you rested your head against his chest.

"I love you," he said softly into your hair. "And I wish you could see yourself the way I do."

You lifted your head to look up at him again, trying to find any sign this was an illusion or a dream. He seemed too good to be real, and yet, here he was, holding you tightly and looking at you with so many steady promises of love and support and kindness in his eyes. 

And sitting within the intimate space between you was a question. A choice that you would now have to make, as he had made his.

"Give me time," you responded to him as you nestled back against his chest. "Some day I will."

If this was a dream, then perhaps all those ugly things you thought about yourself were just a figment of your imagination as well....

~

Clone Tag List: @damerondala, @marvel-starwars-nerd, @dangerousstrawberrypie, @pandora-the-halfling, @misogirl828, @darkangel4121, @sobstea, @rintheemolion, @dionysuskid21, @jesseeka, @hanbetired, @fallingforthem, @harleyevanstan, @imabeautifulbutterfly, @justanothersadperson93, @thatmultifandomdumbass, @sarahtanmarvel, @itsagrimm, @call-me-a-fool, @lackofhonor, @error6gendernotfound, @theclonesdeservebetter, @hannahhearttcw, @Techie-bear, @Lottemoppie13, @salaminus, @arctrooper69, @theroguesully, @clonesimps

[vanilladaises-rp]

TattooArtist! Jungkook-🖕🏻:

Multiple days passed by between Jungkook and I, mostly due to the fact we both had full-time jobs and little time to reply in-between breaks. Eventually, we agreed on a restaurant that was nearby both of our workplaces surprisingly. It was a new restaurant that opened just a few months ago and the price was good enough for a first date. I didn't know if he wanted to go fine dining, so a small restaurant was on the safer side.

I decided to wear a dress in burgundy that had long sleeves, ended above my knees and showed my body off without showing cleavage at all. It was a figure fitting A-line cut, fitting for the weather outside as I grabbed a matching purse to put my essentials inside while heading out via public transport to meet up with Jungkook

We agreed to meet at 6PM right in front of the restaurant, I insisted, as I took the entire day to get ready with my attire and I didn't want him to wait for me awkwardly in my home. I couldn't sleep the night before out of excitement to finally start living my life outside of my monotonous lifestyle.

While watching couples pass by, I looked at the clock as I clearly was too early to get there by half an hour and despite wearing comfortable heels, I felt blisters forming due to the tights I'm wearing. 'I should've worn sock underneath, nobody would've noticed that!', I cursed myself as I looked at my phone mirror to check my attire and makeup.

"I look fucking ridiculous" Sighed the frustrated man, he'd be lying if he said this wasn't his first date, first real date at least. A date to Jungkook was going dancing sexually with some girl in the club or having a one night stand. That's it. So when you had agreed to have a restaurant date, the man was internally losing his shit.

"Dude, you're literally wearing a button up with some slacks, chill" Woosung rolled his eyes. It was secretly funny watching his friend unravel in a panic, it was like watching a clumsy teenage boy going on his first date. Even so, he still wanted to help Jungkook because overall this was a big step for his friend, "Now, put this on. No one wants to smell your aroma of cigarettes and whiskey"

The man had continued to help his friends prepare for the date until it was time to headout, "Just take it moment by moment, and don't make that "I'd be dead than here" type of expression you always have" Woosung joked leaning on the window frame of the car door, making Jungkook roll his eyes before driving off without warning.

On the way their, Jungkook felt his nerves increase as his body felt fidgety and uncomfortable. He was afraid of things not working out, but what scared him more was if they did. What would be his next step? How should he treat you? Jungkook didn't know the first thing about being a good boyfriend, yet alone starting a relationship.

Soon his gps had lead him to the parking lot on the side of the restaurant, parking close to the front. He sat with his thoughts for moment, debating if he should just drive off and forget all about this. No, he couldn't. Jungkook had already came this far, and hated to admit he hasn't been able to get you off his damn mind.

"Fuck it" He took the keys, turning off the car before locking it. As he began to turn the corner, Jungkook saw you standing there in a stunning dress, he shook off his nerves before making himself clear in your view, "I'd say you clean up pretty nice" He spoke with a small smirk, trying to hide the fact how nervous he was.

[tomyo]

Harvest Moon: A New Beginning (its trans)

So I've finally hit a point where I feel like I can breathe again which means its time to get back into my backlog made majorly of Harvest Moon/Story of Seasons games. Admittedly the moment I get into the DS era and beyond, I get overwhelmed by all the mechanics but I spent....a dumb amount of money on these games and I have to push myself to try. Between Trio of Towns and A New Beginning, I chose ANB for two reasons; 1.It might be simpler to jump into 2.You can back door hack yourself into being gay....kinda.

You see the thing is you still can only date hetrosexually BUT you can just change your character to basically look completely like a girl. Trans rights??? Except you'll get misgendered all the time...unless this is a transmasc story instead for the fuckers like me that like to be he/him'd while in full femme mode. Either way, time to romance Yuri!

So admittedly this is a little bit mixed of a guide slash person road map, I am using a Fogu guide but that doesn't necessarily make it easy. So, I'm only on spring 14 but here's what to know thus far:

The game is as handholdy as ACNL/NH and will slowly dole out mechanics over thankfully in game days. Only worry about mechanics as they come.

You will spend per usual a good part of the start will be foraging. Sell the bugs but save flowers/herbs/mushrooms. You will need moon drops for the start of the town restoration. Also save Honey Bees for the second part of it too. Blue flowers are for Emma to befriend her. Hold onto all logs and stones for when Iroha comes.

Talk to all villagers to increase friendship, show them an animal as well but be careful of preferences. Most villager friendship is required to progress to more stores/upgrades.

When you unlock crops, only buy two things of grass. You are given all you need for most of your farm already. Plant and water the grass in the barn area so you'll have fodder in time for the free cow you get a few days later.

Work on shipping tons of potatoes in spring, this will be a headstart for Town Restoration #4 where you need to ship 30 of them.

Events Process: You arrive>>You unlock crops>>Neil arrives and gives you a cow>>Iroha arrives and gives you an Axe and Hammer>> Rebecca arrives and needs house help which unlocks blueprints>> Town Restoration #1>> Town Restoration #2>> Town Restoration #3 start>> Tailor Shop Blue print should unlock if you befriended Emma enough.

Yuri also seems extremely easy to woo honestly, her special like is one of the early recipes which is also important to eat regularly. In general I just love her and its a crime she can't be romanced same sexly but its okay because again, we are transing ourselves which she and Allen will help with. Wow! What a little gay gender affirming circle that is lmao.

The goal is to get Yuri in my town by early to mid fall, the biggest road block is during restoration 2 you need to ship 10 honey which will take 6 days to make so the more hives the better from the start. Clearing out the farm during summer is imperative. Hives are made out of small lumber and honey combs which is why collecting as much as possible is important (and collecting bees for them too!).

After Yuri is unlocked, the only goals are to raise a lot of sheep for wool. hatch 10 chicks, and get one yak when the chance is given. Side goals include birthing three Cows, sheep, and Alpaca during my second year. Most of Restoration 3 and beyond involves mining and wool so I expect to spend winter doing a lot of digging while also being aware that I'll probably not complete the storyline until at least late into year 2. There's more focus on festivals in the final two restorations as well as a lot of odd gems.

Post main plot is for clothing, house decoration, and child rearing. Emma, Neil, Olivia, Sanjay, and the travel location people are important towards gift exchanges. Outfits will just unlock as I go thanks to Yuri. I might also do a split save before marrying Yuri simply because Witch Princess is always kinda cool but is so late game that having to rebuild everything to marry her might honestly kill me.

It seems partially ridiculous to be so early in the game and to be writing so much already but its one of those series where you need a huge planning stage before you even start anything. To which I find fun the preplan. Admittedly also because the current game play is so repetitive; Watering and animal care in the morning, chasing after Emma for her daily gift, and then wrapping around foraging a couple of times before the night watering. It doesn't help either that there is no quality of life improvements as you go, apparently not even power berries this time.

The path to repairing a town is kind of a fun mechanic to be real; ACNH widely disappointed me for not really being the civilization maker it promised, Hometown story is interesting for a similar was in how it runs, Pioneers of Olive Town sometimes is the perfect amount of town rebuilder, and of course the ever popular stardew valley is great for slowly building up additions to an already pretty sound townspace, and I yearn for easier access to Animal Parade for how lovely the area is even if a bit of a travelling nightmare at points. I don't expect ANB to be revolutionary necessarily but I'm excited to GET to the point where I can suddenly dish out a bunch of town support. It's kind of cool how there's barely love interests as well because of it.

[nitrosodiumfmp]

First Tangible Strands of Progress

Having started a new Unreal project (first person shooter seemed the closest analog to my own idea) I changed the sky colour to a ghoulish turquoise, something I had learned from the second project. I did try out some other aesthetics as well; namely, a more dusky orange sky.

This one in particular is very reminiscent of the early days of Overdeath's development. I can only hope this one goes better. As you can also see, I built a few towers with purple lights in their perches. I will admit; the towers are pretty shoddily made; it took maybe two minutes in total, and if I put them in the final game, I'll probably use Maya or something.

I may have increased the light level a little too much.

I knew I wanted moving parts in the game; that was a prerequisite. After trawling the Unreal forums, I found a good explanation of how to make them, and it was the way I had previously planned: Timelines. This piece of code is connected to an actor shaped like a gearwheel, and from the game start, it spins. This took a bit of work and led to some comical events: for example, the gear would tumble horizontally because I hooked the Timeline output to the wrong axis. I then had to flip the gear model within the actor viewport, because it kept on spawning in on its side for some reason.

Here is the finished scene. That big gear spins, though it isn't illustrated so well in an image. I added another tower for good measure, and a precarious stack of boxes that you can knock over.

Tomorrow, I have some more plans. Firstly, I need to implement doors. Walk up to them, press E, and they open on a Timeline. No more complex than a Doom door. Then we can have keycards and associated locked doors - same thing, just with a Bool in there as well. From there, elevators with activation switches (i'd probably use two different timelines, GoUp and GoDown, each activated by the respective switch, or do it on a flipflop somehow). Then I could even add trains that the player could ride across the map in.

As for gameplay, it'd require enemies. To facilitate exploration, you've got the obvious need to search for keys and the exit, but also to look around for ammunition. I want to implement combat in a very limited sense; in each level, you will have enough ammo to realistically kill half of all enemies, so searching around will make things easier, and you might be able to get out of a sticky situation, but it won't mean you can go on a rampage. I'm still not sure on how to implement the story.

[backdaft]

listen i know this is my archive sideblog but i'm a little embarrassed to put this on main. i had a um. story i was planning to do for 2 years or so that got to like 12k before i put it on hold forever but i at least want to put down my general outline somewhere / not have it go to waste idk

carl tries to befriend johnny as a young kid and fails. stinky trying to target johnny with pranks at the same time doesn't help

carl fails as a bully in middle school / it backfires on him. johnny's the only target he has and the stronger bullies just attack them both.

johnny and carl finally become friends in high school. at first, johnny is antagonistic, but seeing carl covered in acne with a stupid mullet similar to his (carl heard johnny say mullets were stupid just months ago. what changed? nothing!) made him laugh. carl on the other hand acts more in line with what johnny remembers from elementary school. in fact, the only reason carl tried out bullying was a desperate attempt to avoid getting bullied himself. it didn't work and carl really regrets it. so when johnny makes fun of him at first he's like "yeah i deserve that."

johnny and carl are bullied in high school by retooled versions of trent and his goons from time of my life. at one point they steal a squint ringo figure of johnny's and carl ends up trading a trip mccoy figure to get it back. this is a huge milestone in their friendship

johnny is still a jerk even in his teens but he does care. he's a bigmouth with fluctuating grades and gets into trouble but he's a Trying. he's nicer than he is in his 20s though, that's for sure. once a bonehead, always a bonehead, as they say.

sandy once saves both johnny and carl from getting swirlies and johnny gets a huge crush on her. carl on the other hand wants to be friends with her— he's not into the dating scene much yet. he's rejected one girl or two so far and it makes johnny jealous and bitter.

pops' moon palace used to be an ice cream parlor by the same name. this is a nod to the "pops' soda shoppe" bible concept. teen johnny and carl were the reason why he rebranded to a retro-styled diner (kids aren't banned but. they had a fight. it involved food. they had to help pops clean up. they're enough of a hassle as it is.) pops gave carl the wrong ice cream every time as a test to see if he'd gather the courage to actually tell him he got the wrong one instead of nervously letting it slide Because He's Old (he was actually in his 50s back then. he started graying early.) and they become friends

in sophomore or junior year, carl begins to realize he has potential in science and starts to enjoy school more. this is him getting nerdier. it gives him a huge ego boost and he starts hanging out with uptight geek kids more instead of johnny. trouble is, they're not quite his friends. in fact, they make fun of his social skills and 'odd' interests in a more pretentious way. on johnny's end, he becomes jealous of the geeks "brainwashing" his best friend, but he gets very distracted by his increased interest in girls. carl decides johnny is a much better friend than those kids are and he isn't wrong.

the high school prom mentioned in candidate johnny is fully interlaced with the time of my life. carl brings a rubber duck to prom. johnny, upset and grumpy, sincerely believes sandy stood him up. he goes to prom anyway because are you kidding he wouldn't want to miss the girls food and the drinks etc. johnny sees the duck and takes the opportunity to cheer himself up via humiliating carl and it escalates

after some thinking, johnny comes to the conclusion that carl is the one thing holding him back / preventing him from getting what he wants in a few different ways.

after they graduate, johnny goes to the gym a lot, becomes very distant with carl and things start to reflect present day canon. johnny can't fully break the friendship with carl because deep down he still cares, he's just too stubborn. carl, on the other hand, Will Not give up because they only really have each other

fast forward some time and the events of "you cast a spell" happen in an 'episode' titled "hocus doofus." it ends differently. carl snaps, but he doesn't necessarily try to beat up johnny. this is as far as i'm gonna talk about

there were definitely moments where carl having a one-sided crush on johnny was kind of obvious but nothing super shippy overall

[screechthemighty]

WIP Wednesday if anyone is interested!

Yes, I am still writing four (4) God of War fics at a time, what of it. Worked on all four today, so first here's something from rose colored boy:

There were rumors that Thor had been spotted in the area, which meant a lot more people in the Mountain than usual. Faye would have gone to see for herself, but two things stopped her. One: she had promised she wasn’t going to try and fight Thor, and she was self-aware enough to know she might break that promise if she saw the bastard.

(Oh, Faye, you're definitely gonna)

And here's some more from will you greet the daylight looming (sidebar, good news, I think I more or less know how this chapter is going to go):

“Sometimes. And it really depends on when you see it.” Angrboda glanced at Skjöldr before turning her attention back to the shrine. They needed some attention after three years of snow. She’d insisted on doing it herself. “This used to be past, present, future. Now it’s more like…beginning, middle, end, I guess.”

“Yeah, that makes sense. Much as any of this makes sense.”

Here's some more from the Atreus the Elder fic (again, I think I know more or less how this one is going to go, too):

It helped that he was charismatic. He didn’t have the incentive of a leader, but he was good at keeping everyone’s spirits up. Once they got past the initial barrier of how truly strange he could be, the others liked him. Kratos found that whenever he was put in charge, his orders went over a lot better when Atreus was there to encourage them.

Come on, men! We’ll show those glorified hay bales what a real Spartan looks like!

Meanwhile, in the Fayetos pre-relationship fic, yes Faye has already noticed those beautiful eyes, what of it:

It made him look a lot less like a bear and a lot more like a random wanderer, a drifter. He could’ve been anyone, had it not been for his skin tone and those piercing golden eyes.

And now we'll run a gauntlet of "proof that I haven't forgotten about the other fandoms I'm writing for", starting with the marclayla fic collection:

The figure that stepped into the room was Mr. Knight, but he was adjusting his outfit as he came in–pulling down the sleeves, fiddling with the gloves. “Okay, what’re we…” He spotted Frenchie and the mask came off. “Ah, mon meilleur ami, are we flying today?”

And yes I am still chipping away at Resident Evil fic, I'm pretty sure I'm close to the point where the plot is actually plotting, which will help this get written faster:

“Everything I’ve been through,” he said, staring down the cold compress on his arm, “all of that bullshit. And I’m still…” The only thing that kept him from swearing more was Rose being in the room, staring him down with a slightly concerned look. “...I’m still allergic to bees?!”

“It would seem so, yes,” Doctor Marshall said calmly.

I had been working on my RCU/God of War crossover fics, but for whatever reason, I wasn't feeling them, so I went back to writing the just pure RCU stuff. Here's something from the Miraith stuff:

Wraith was going to kill him. If Elliott didn’t get shot in the next few seconds, she was going to get disqualified for friendly fire.

And here's Barker being incredibly helpful in the citadel:

“I was thinking maybe it was a subconscious thing, like a reflex, but guess not. Maybe the danger level wasn’t high enough…”

“Please do not increase the danger level against my pilot,” BT interrupted.

And finally, here's something from the little bit of a symbol of hope that I've written since updating the fic!

The displaced population of Gotham had been one of the first to accept the Batman's presence. Perhaps they were grateful someone had taken to chasing off the members of the element who preyed on their vulnerability. Perhaps they saw him as a lesser threat, considering the many other things they had to deal with. It had been an interesting change of pace early in his crusade, and now an increasingly welcome one. It was, if nothing else, novel to be treated as if he were simply part of the landscape.