#like for once my mind is calm and not constantly racing from one thing to the next? idk it’s hard to describe but yea

[hannanodaa]

hello again😅👋 srry it’s been wild these past month or two for me but I finally remembered that I have Tumblr and I’m here again 🙈🙈

[gothicminxx]

Satosugu x afab! Reader

Word count: 5.2K

CW: Angst with comfort, mentions of blood, major character death, polyamory, mentions of established relationship with Gojo, pet names (angel, pretty girl, my girl, sweet girl, etc.), instead of Y/N Name will be used instead, all around sad af

Part 2 here

Summary: Has a connection to the movie JJK 0, similar but not quite.

I think of Satosugu and I sob.

Hope you enjoy!

Twilight arrived over the horizon, painting the sky of soft purples mixed with pink and blue. Mountain tops capped off with sheets of white that sparkled underneath the setting sun. Silence loomed overhead with the subtle sounds of a breeze, the air crisp with a harsh bite. The grass is glacial from the previous snowfall a few hours ago.

But the world was covered in darkness as the giant hand that pertained to Satoru lay flatly over your eyes, sitting in between his legs on a rock. A habit that he had formed in recent years to mollify the bitter head of anxiety that crippled your body. When the thoughts began to race and the hammering of your heart refused to disperse from your side, Satoru placed his hand over your eyes. The rasp of his voice tickled your ear as he requested you focus, following his deep breaths, and hushed praises for succeeding. When the dark silence consumed the crevices of your brain it pacified the cavernous void that Suguru left behind. The reason for every apprehensive thought that consumed the confinements of your brain. A gaping hole resided in the depths of your pumping heart, one he had overfilled before-- a spilling pool of red wine: warm, gentle, and welcoming, the essence of pertaining to two lovers.

Satoru shared the absence of light with you simply by covering your eyes. He wore blindfolds to protect his six eyes, to keep the core of his energy balanced so as to not fatigue himself, he experienced the bliss of darkness daily listening to the calmness of his breath, the steadiness of his heart, and the sounds of his surroundings. It was peaceful when things seemed to spiral out of control, tensions at an all time high giving Satoru that moment to ease his mind. It was the only thing he could think to do to alleviate the strain of life that gnawed at you constantly like a tender cut of meat.

The coolness of this year's harsh winter stung your cheeks, penetrating at the surface to numb your whole face. You placed your hands on top of Satoru’s, holding it in place to increase the darkness, focusing on the environment you found yourself in. Snow that the wind carried tickled your skin, dampening it slightly as the flakes melted. The comfort of your puffy jacket and beanie kept you toasty to endure the frozen conditions, but in this very moment the cold brought you solace as you embraced the blackness. You could feel the warmth of Satoru’s chest radiate into your back like a warm blanket, the breeze that blew on the side of your face howled softly, swooshing of powdered snowflakes followed. The plateau you and Satoru sat in was desolate of noise, it calmed the erratic beat of your heart and soothed the harrowing thoughts in your mind.

Since Suguru’s impetuous departure from the both of you things had been difficult, words left unsaid with various questions that had gone unanswered. An empty spot on the bed that used to belong to him had now turned cold and desperately clung onto his scent, you and Satoru had found yourselves leaving that space open, as if he’d ever walk through the front door again and reclaim the life he once had. His hoodies still hung up in the closet, his toothbrush still had a spot in the holder, boxes of his favorite tea littered the cabinet-- you preferred coffee, and Satoru liked soda. Suguru’s things were left untouched in your home, things he left behind, and things you and Satoru held onto tightly; protecting the last bit of residue on those items.

Satoru snaked his free arm around, pressing his palm flatly against your abdomen, fingertips caressing the polyester fabric of the puffer jacket that adorned your frame. He gently removed his hand from your eyes as he felt you relax in his hold, leaning forward to rest his chin against your shoulder. The world had come back into your view, the sky had become a darker shade of blue accompanied by a few stars that twinkled. The sun had fully hid behind the snowy mountain range taking away the last bit of warmth it had offered in the winter months. Satoru had insisted on taking you far from the city today despite the ice on the roads, the sunken bags underneath your eyes had prompted worry that he could not ignore. You were the only thing keeping him sane since Suguru had left, Satoru had grown petrified of losing you too. He could sense the ugly cloud of melancholy looming over your head, the way you slouched at the kitchen table-- barely touching the food on your plate, a frown etched on your lips, and tears left to dry on your cheeks. The way you stared at Suguru’s spot in bed wearing one of his hoodies, the yearning and agony you felt all too evident to him that he had to get you away from home for a few hours.

He had always been better at tucking away his emotions so as to not worry you. But Satoru felt the same agony, the cavernous hole in his heart that felt as though a knife had stabbed through and ripped a chunk out. The bile that burned the back of his throat and left a bitter taste that it didn’t matter how many times he brushed his teeth; it remained. That each time he smelled Jasmine or cedar wood he immediately burst into tears, teeth piercing his bottom lip as he tried to mollify the dreary emotions that raked his body. Oftentimes he found himself wearing Suguru’s clothes, wrapping his arms around his own body and pretending as though it was Suguru comforting him. Satoru grieved the relationship that once was, in silence, wanting to be strong for you, the most precious thing in his life. You needed Satoru more than anything in moments where you barely found the strength to get out of bed. When anxiety consumed you like the last meal on earth, he had to be strong for you.

Placing a kiss to your cold cheek Satoru hummed, “You calm now, angel?” He held you tighter in his embrace, shutting his eyes to engrave every curve of your body, the warmth you provided as you sat in between his legs, and your scent. The trepidation he felt of losing you too was one that made him lose his appetite.

Leaning your head back on his shoulder, your eyes followed the depth of the night sky, each star glimmering like a diamond. With the darkness the cold in the plateau stung your face, your nose runny and icy to the touch, but you could only focus on Satoru’s arms, “Yes, shutting out the world always seems to help,” A small smile reached your lips, “Thank you.”

Intertwining your gloved hands together he brought the back to his lips placing a kiss there making your heart flutter. Since Suguru deserted his lovers, through the agony and stabbing wound in one's heart, you still had Satoru. The six eyes refused to leave your side even for a moment, clinging onto you as a sort of life support.

The anguish was evident in his cerulean eyes, deep purple bags had found their home under his eyes, hidden under a blindfold so as to not worry his students— to worry you. Even if a part of his heart clung onto the memory of Suguru, the rest was yours. Glowing sun of warmth that caressed his cheek, holding him tightly to always feel the ardor of your heart. Lulling the anxiety he felt with lingering kisses, fingers tangled in snowy white tuffs, and the sound of your sweet voice covered in honey— speaking saccharine words.

Even if he tried to hide from you, keeping his emotions tucked away in a metal safe— you knew, of course you saw right through him. Having the privilege of meeting Satoru Gojo years ago meant understanding every single emotion he felt. A strong intuition to sense when something was off, he never truly spoke about it, only on the rare occasion of dawn drawing near, his eyes half lidded, and voice coaxed of sleep that he spoke— tired of the torment of a racing mind. You would hold him tightly in your arms, resting your chin on his hair as he sobbed into your chest, allowing his emotions to ripple like a waterfall. He was yours, you wanted to be there as much as he was there for you.

His giant hand cupped your cheek, leading your lips to his. The kiss was gentle, slow, and filled with love, Satoru’s tongue was warm as it found yours, eager to taste more of you to have more of you— he couldn’t get enough. He held you tight, pressing against your abdomen as it bunched up the polyester fabric in between his fingers. His thumb caressing your cheekbone, kissing you was a piece of heaven; Satoru’s sanctuary. The way his lips connected to yours reminded him that you were perfect for him in every sense of the way. That you were still here with him.

Satoru pulled away, resting his forehead against yours to catch his breath. His eyes remained closed but a goofy smile was ever present, his heart thudding loudly he truly believed you could hear it, light pink dusted his pale skin, “My girl. Mine.” He murmured, attaching his lips to yours once more.

It was moments like these that you truly cherished, engraving his every word into your brain like a chanted prayer. Satoru was here to stay, he could not imagine parting from you; it wasn’t possible.

Together you grieved Suguru, the fallen angel that had big aspirations of changing the world for the better. Ideals that you could not see eye to eye on, the raven haired man swore up and down it was a world for his lovers. Even if it seemed selfish at the time he would burn down the entire world for you and Satoru. If it had meant taking the life of the innocent— the weak, for those he loved, he’d do it over and over again. But the question had always remained: Would either of you do the same?

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ ✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

The sun blazed down on the asphalt in a persistent manner, the heat waves radiated off of the dark pavement that burned the soles of shoes. Summer was unforgiving this year, humid and sickly that shade did little to provide an escape. The metal bleachers burned to the touch from constant heat smacking against them, the grass seemed as the only comforting place to sit underneath a Japanese cedar tree. Strands of green sticking to your thighs that you regretted wearing a skirt, almost.

First grade Jujutsu students practiced their combat skill in the enormous field, sweat dripping down their faces after an hour of intense training. The new student Yuta Okkotsu showed promise— improving his cursed energy little by little. Satoru had taken a liking to him, a powerful curse that followed him around— killing those that harmed him without a second glance. Your husband had a soft spot for teenagers that had a tough life, a man that could come off as arrogant had a huge heart. A few weeks ago Satoru had come to you, announcing he would be pleading Yuta’s case to avoid an execution even if it meant losing his job. You could never argue with him, standing next to him as you petitioned for the young boy as well.

Training had gone as any other day, students complaining about the heat but refusing to go inside— each competitive. Satoru stood with Yaga on the far end of the field coaching Maki and Yuta, while you and Shoko sat under a tree watching over Toge and Panda. The smell of tobacco wafted into your nostrils as Shoko lit up another cigarette, stating it would help with her irritation as she wiped sweat from her brow. Your fingers found the roots of grass to slowly pick at it, a distraction from the unbearable heat that made your body feel as if it would combust into flames.

Leaning back on your elbows you sighed loudly, throwing your head back further into the shade to look at the intricate leaves— hiding from the wretched sun. “How much longer are we going to torture the students in this goddamn heat?” Shoko groaned beside you.

“‘Dunno, until one of us drives Yaga up the wall with our complaining.” You chuckled, “Knowing Satoru I’d say soon.”

Due to Satoru being born in the winter season the six eyes preferred the cold and icy snow over the blistering heat. He thrived at the first snowfall, dragging you out of the warmth of your cozy bed to admire the sheet of white. His long legs would race to the backyard without the proper clothing to handle the freezing temperatures, slender fingers grabbing a handful of snow to feel the cool softness on his flesh. He’d spend a few hours outside admiring it with childlike wonder, you would oftentimes fight him to come inside as if he were a husky— stubborn and flourishing in the snow. It wouldn’t surprise you if your husband was currently throwing a fit about the sweltering heat to Yaga.

Booming voices ricocheted from the trees in the field, snapping you out of your thoughts. Shoko’s ears perched giving you a confused glance as she licked her finger to put out her cigarette, “What could that be?” She wondered.

Together you stood, requesting Toge and Panda to follow along in case it happened to be something serious. Sweat decorated your brow as the impending heat found you, raising the temperature within the confinements of your body. In the distance a large bird bigger than a human flapped its wings, the radiant golden color catching in the sun, throwing its head back to emit a loud squawk from its enormous beak. Bodies of students surrounded the creature, tuffs of milky white hair came into view as his tall lanky figure pushed past bodies. From where you walked you could see the tension in his shoulders, jaw clenched, and fists white-- something was wrong.

The length of your legs began to take lager hurried strides, loud pounding rang in your ears from the erratic beating of your heart. Heads turned as you drew closer, wandering eyes with a look of confusion stared back at you, “Satoru, long time no see!” A silky voice called, sweet like honey, a soft melody to listen to. A voice that closed up your throat, heart dropping to the depths of your stomach, eyes stinging with ocean water because it had been so long since you had heard it. The voice that comforted you when a tough day crossed your path, made you laugh until you cried, talked you through it in moments of ecstasy, and spoke sweet nothings to you.

As you pushed your way into the circle Satoru stood taut, a white blindfold covered his cerulean eyes, expression hard to read but his tight jaw spoke for him. You followed his gaze, time had frozen still as long raven hair met your eyes, glistening in the light of the sun. A smile adorned his features as he greeted Satoru with an arm around Yuta’s shoulder, he had yet to notice you. It had been nearly a decade since you had seen the familiar face, had him in close radius. “Suguru?” Your voice barely above a whisper, cracking pathetically towards the end.

His attention drifted towards you, “Name, it’s been a while.” The smile he wore faded the moment brown eyes truly caught a glimpse of you, the sight nearly broke his heart. You looked on the verge of tears, the yearning to run into his arms was evident as your hand blindly reached out-- but you held back, taking a hold of Satoru’s sleeve too paralyzed to move. The white haired man placed a protective arm on your waist as if to challenge Suguru to take a step further to either of you. But in truth Satoru would break down if given the opportunity, trying his best to remain strong, to come off as intimidating to the man that ripped his heart open; you both knew this.

“Step away from those kids right now, Suguru.” Satoru’s voice held a stern edge, the man in front of him was the only one that could affect the usual confident demeanor he had.

Suguru held back a smirk as he slowly removed his arm from Yuta, “ I heard the first years were quite special, it seems you still have an eye for talent, Satoru.”

Your gaze was fixed on the raven haired man, it felt like a sick joke, one that your mind deemed fit as a punishment for past mistakes you had once made. He looked different than before, his hair was much longer, reaching his waist. The purple eye bags and look of misery that had become a part of him almost a decade ago had disappeared, his skin practically glowing, he looked happier-- cockier than the man you once knew. You wanted to be as calm as Satoru, to appear stoic and un-bothered but the air felt heavy, the lump in your throat had formed so thick that it was nearly impossible to swallow back. For a decade you still found yourself grieving his sudden departure, the closure he had refused to give you and Satoru, leaving nothing behind but memories and a freezing empty spot in bed. “What are you doing here?” You asked, voice hostile yet the sense of longing was still there.

He tore his gaze from Satoru avoiding your watery eyes over to his entourage, “I came to declare war,” Suguru put it simply, “Five days from now I’ll be in Kyoto, I hope to see you all there.”

“A war?” Shoko scoffed, “Your ideals truly have gone to your head.”

“I’m simply creating a better world.” Suguru’s words left a bitter taste in your mouth, like rusty metal that had sat out in the sun long forgotten for an extended period of time. He no longer sounded like himself, his voice remained velvety and yet, the disconnect of the man he used to be was immense. It had brought you back to the time you were once a student, noticing his distant demeanor with hazy eyes that he looked unrecognizable. He closed in on himself, shutting you and Satoru out. Most nights had been spent sleeping on the couch or too wired as he stayed up an entire night frantically scribbling gibberish in his journal-- ideas to cleanse the world of the weak. He refused the assistance of the comforting arms of his lovers, rejecting their words of reassurance. Suguru had lost a drastic amount of weight, the churning of his stomach accompanied by a burning in his throat that kept him away from consuming food. He had become a shell of himself until one day his radio silence became permanent; leaving his lovers to fend for themselves without another word.

Only for him to return months later in the crowded square of downtown Tokyo claiming that it was all for his lovers. The world he was creating was the perfect one for those he cared about, asking to accompany him in the journey of discovering it together, only to be met by your tears and Satoru’s anger. It was the irreparable end of a relationship.

Biting your bottom lip harshly, you could taste the tang of metallic blood on your tongue, holding Satoru’s sleeve tighter, only for the milky haired man to search for your hand to intertwine your fingers-- squeezing it tightly, he could feel your agony, resentment, and pining. Focusing on his features, you wanted to burn them into your memory, hold them close to your heart because you would be damned if you forgot his face, “I think it’s time for you to go, Suguru.” You muttered, digging your nails into the palm of your hand imprinting crescent moons in the flesh; fighting back the tears that threatened to spill as you urged the man that still owned half of your heart to go.

Silence loomed overhead as Suguru processed the words that escaped your lips; soft that he almost missed them, how desperately he wanted to ignore them to take you and Satoru in his arms and make things better. The version of him you had known before was gone, that man was no longer a part of who he truly was, the weak and strong simply could not co-exist. Why couldn’t either of you understand that for his own selfish reasons, this was all for you? He turned on his heel, sauntering over to the enormous bird, only turning his head enough to catch a glimpse of the two people he adored the most, “I’ll see you in Kyoto. Until next time.” With that the creature expanded its wings, descending in the air with the man that still held onto your hearts.

Satoru watched as the massive bird disappeared into nothingness, the stitches in his heart that had once existed ripped open-- crimson blood gushing out, the ache unbearable. Holding your smaller hand tightly he began to walk toward the direction of his classroom, a small sob escaped your lips before you tried your best to hide it but he had heard it. The tall man stopped, only to see your pretty face covered in fat tears with quivering lips as you tried to fight off dramatic sobs. “Oh, my sweet girl.” Satoru cooed, bending down to envelope you in his arms. His large hand cupped the back of your head, stroking your hair as he held you tightly. He buried his nose in your hair, a small tear falling from his own eye but he was quick to wipe it.

“I- I miss him,‘Toru,” You choked out,“So much.”

“Me too, angel, me too.”

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ ✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩

Dark gray clouds covered the sky, leaving Kyoto in complete darkness. The sounds of war engulfed the city with crumbling buildings, destroyed vehicles, and thick clouds of smoke from small fires that had started. The perfect distraction Suguru had created to get to Yuta, it hadn’t registered in your minds that it had been his plan to get everyone away from the vicinity of Jujutsu High School.

You stood in a medical building to assist in healing those injured alongside Shoko, gifted the same ability of reversed curse technique with the upper hand of bringing those back from the dead on rare occasions. A skill you had spent most of your life trying to achieve, it had only been possible with the help of Tengen and Satoru. The consequences of cheating death had yet to show themselves to you, bringing back countless from watery graves— a draining task that consumed most of your cursed energy for a few days, it wasn’t used often.

Crouching over a severely injured fourth grade student the grand glass door of the building opened, as footsteps scrambled to deliver another injured student you felt the familiar cursed energy of your husband. “I have to go back to Jujutsu High, he set this whole thing up. Suguru is after Yuta.” He stated, gritting his teeth.

“I’m coming with you.” The urgency in your voice was hard to miss.

Satoru could only shake his head, holding his hand up to stop you from coming any closer to him, “No, it’s too dangerous, Name. Stay here and treat the wounded.”

He was always overprotective of you, your safety had always been the six eyes priority only growing ten fold the moment Suguru abandoned the both of you. You understood, but at the same time you weren’t weak, classified as a special grade two weeks after attending school. Training day in and day out when it came to combat, craving to be as perfect as Satoru and Suguru— the two strongest sorcerers. “I don’t care! I’m going with you and that’s final.” You had always been stubborn, constantly standing your ground and refusing any form of rejection when it came to proving yourself. It was a trait Satoru adored about you, but oftentimes it drove him crazy with worry, he knew you were strong but you were the last person he had besides Megumi.

Determination painted your features, clenching your fists at your side to show Satoru you weren’t going to give up. He couldn’t argue with his beautiful wife, especially with the way you looked at him as if you would follow him to the ends of the Earth. “So stubborn.” He huffed, taking your hand before teleporting the both of you to Jujutsu High.

It was silent the moment you arrived on campus grounds the smell of burnt wood wafted in the air as you walked hand in hand. A knot formed in your gut as if it were signaling you that something had gone terribly wrong, it made you tighten your hold on Satoru’s hand. The silence was deafening as the residue of a previous battle remained in the air and grubble of buildings.

Turning the corner of vacant buildings, you could see a figure in the distance covered in crimson liquid, missing a limb, long raven hair a disheveled mess as his signature bun had come undone, “You guys are late as usual.” Suguru weakly chuckled, clutching his side.

“The students in Kyoto were under your control?” Satoru asked, though he held no confusion, you both knew the answer.

Suguru leaned back on a cement wall letting out a ragged breath, “Yes, they all were.”

Letting go of Satoru’s hand you couldn’t care less about the things Suguru had done, the misery he caused when he disappeared, or even those he hurt. Your vision became blurry with tears as you took in his condition, bloodied and bruised as he struggled to maintain a steady breath. You could not bear to listen to much more, this time you had allowed yourself to run to Suguru as you had longed since seeing him on school grounds five days ago. Not giving Satoru a moment to think as he watches your figure bolt for the raven haired man.

Kneeling in front of him your arms wrapped around his neck bringing his body close to yours, without hesitation he wrapped his arm around your waist burying his bloodied face in your neck. The smell of jasmine and cedarwood welcomed you, the scent that had always belonged to him, the one that caused a sob to escape your lips. “You idiot.” You cried into his hair, clutching him tightly, afraid to let go and discover that he was a figment of your imagination.

You were warm, skin silky soft— he had forgotten how good it felt to have you in his arms, if he was being honest with himself he had forgotten your scent, how sweet and delicate it was. “There’s my sweet girl.” Suguru croaked, after a decade of pushing away the hurt he caused himself for leaving, was finally flooding out. Trembling as he hugged you tightly, burning your scent, curves, and hair into his memory. A treasure he’d lock up and guard with his entire being.

“I can fix it, let me fix it… let me heal you.” You begged, cupping his cheeks, blood staining your hands.

“Name, you can’t.” Satoru whispered, tilting his head down.

“What?! No, I'm going to fix h-“

Before you could finish your sentence Suguru took your hand, placing a kiss to the back of it, “It’s for the best, angel.”

You shook your head frantically, sobbing loudly as you looked between Satoru and Suguru, begging to not allow it to end this way. Burying your face in Suguru’s neck, closing your eyes as if to wish to wake up from this nightmare. To wake in your huge bed with them on either side of you, each wrapped around you as they slept soundly. The harsh cold breeze flowing in through your window as it snowed outside, dreading the moment Satoru woke up because he’d drag the two of you outside. Wanting a life back that once was, when Suguru was content with the things he had, when the two of you were enough for him, just one more time.

Suguru grabbed your hand, swaying your two bodies together. Noticing the rays of sunshine bouncing off of a rather large diamond on your finger nearly blinding him, he took a moment to admire it, chuckling bitterly as a wave of jealousy flooded over him. “My love’s got married.” Suguru could only blame himself for abandoning you both, envious he wouldn’t be able to share the Gojo last name with the both of you. A part of him was truly happy for you two, moving on after his selfish act. It wouldn’t have been fair to request either of you to remain stagnant.

“In October two years ago.” Satoru smiled sadly, twiddling with the diamond band on his ring finger. Proud to call you his wife, to be the one to take care of you and cherish moments spent together. It hurt that Suguru couldn’t be a part of it.

“I can fix you… then… then we can try to mend everything. Sugu please.” You choked.

But the decision had been made for you, the conclusion that Suguru was on death’s doorstep had become destiny in the moment. Your pleas and cries went unanswered even if it pained both of the men to cause such agony for you. In the end Suguru no longer had the ability to change, too stuck in his ideals to let them go. “I still love you.” You weeped.

Suguru’s heart sank at your words, even after the crimes he had commited and the torture he had put you through your emotions remained in tact, “I love you too.” The raven haired man kisses your temple, “and I love you, ‘Toru.”

A few tears had finally escaped his cerulean eyes, “I love you too… I’m sorry.”

A flash of purple came into your peripheral vision, the ringing in your ears was painful. Time had slowed as Suguru’s muscular body fell limp in your arms, the look of horror on your face was one that Satoru would remember forever. A loud scream erupted from your lungs that it felt as though they’d rip open at the seams, oxygen became impossible to inhale as you wailed out to the sky clutching his lifeless body in your arms. “No! No, ‘Toru… no. Suguru please,” The only thing you could muster was to beg and wail, preparing to use the entirety of your cursed energy to bring back your dead lover.

But Satoru pulled you away before you could do anything, holding your flailing body in his arms as he howled alongside you. He would hold onto this guilt for the rest of his life, ripping Suguru away from your lives as he meant nothing when he was everything would tear him to shreds. Suguru had perished by his own hands, he felt like a monster. All he could do was throw you over his shoulder and listen to the heart wrenching wails that left you as he dragged you away from Suguru.

He’d never forgive himself.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

[blchrsworld]

my heart just can’t be faithful for long | billie eilish x fem reader

synopsis. billie and you have been arguing constantly for some time now. after a night out, she starts an argument and you can’t take it anymore.

cw. arguing, verbal fighting, breakup, mentions of cheating, toxic relationship, angst

soundtrack. cry - cigarettes after sex

length. short

The night started nicely as Billie and you went out to party for one of your co-stars all up until a fight erupted between the two of you.

“It doesn’t fucking matter Billie – I never paid any mind to him once tonight!” With Billie following closely behind, you quarreled as you strode into the kitchen and angrily set your Chanel handbag on the counter. With an irate expression on her face, Billie placed her hands on either side of the countertop and said, "You are so full of shit." Her blue eyes met yours.

For almost four months, you and Billie had been having fights on a regular basis. Billie first accused you of cheating on her with your close friend, Jacob Elordi, who was also one of your co-stars in a recent film. Billie would obsess over the friendship, envisioning the worst case scenarios.

The relationship was not ideal because of long distance, especially since you were working on new tv shows and movies while Billie was working on her next album.

The anger that shot through you caused your face to flush, and you detested Billie for having provoked such a reaction in you over such a baseless accusation. Your eyes began to burn and well up with tears.

You confess in a nervous tone, concentrating on your nails to divert your attention from sobbing, "Billie, I can't do this anymore."

“What?” Billie asked in a sharp tone, glancing up at you as she noticed how exhausted you appeared.

When you lifted your head to gaze up at your partner of two years, you knew it was time to part ways. For now, anyway, until you two resolved your differences. You looked at Billie with a knowing expression in your eyes as a tear raced down your cheek and fell onto the dark wood countertop.

You could have sweared at that very moment that Billie's life was flashing before her eyes. She began to recognize herself and felt hopelessness creep in.

“No.” Billie spoke in an emotionless tone.

“Billie this needs to st-“

"No, no, no." Billie reiterated, at which point you sighed haltingly at her manners and closed your eyes, considering your next move and how it would affect your two-year relationship.

Your brain was warning you against giving in to her because, after all, she was the cause of the teary-eyed, restless nights. You now had a different perspective on yourself because of her. You were unsure if there was a problem with you for her to question your commitment. Although your brain was filled with a deep hatred for her, there was always a small part of you that could not help but love her.

Your heart.

That was the aspect of you that people noticed the most that was not physical. No matter how much your mind tried to remind you of the harm Billie had caused you, your heart was unable to stop loving her.

What made your heart explode was the little things about your relationship with Billie that no one else would see.

Like when she would lay her eyes on you, she would always have that sparkle in them. Or the fact that you would run out of room in your house when she would bring you flowers three times a week just because. She was always your plus one and never sought to usurp your attention, no matter what premier you had.

You walked around the counter and put your hand on hers, saying, "It's the right thing to do, Billie," but she withdrew her hand.

"It's Jacob isn't it?"

You rolled your eyes and scoffed at the remark, but you could understand her point of view and chose to stay calm. At last, her puffy red eyes looked up at you, and you croaked, "It's not him Billie, or anyone at all, it's the fact that you can't trust me anymore."

"I can fix it, we can fix it," Billie said, her eyes sad, as you returned the look with a shake of your head.

“I’ve tried — for the past four months already,” you retort with a distasteful look.

You were tired of Billie playing the victim and needed to leave this relationship.

You had never felt anything like this before, as your heart began to slowly break. Your chest started to fill with air more quickly than you could handle. You tried to knead your chest to ease the pain by placing your hand over your heart, but it didn't work. You had to leave Billie as the agony got worse and make your way to the living room.

It was when your body began to relax on the back of a couch that you broke completely. You silently started to cry, and you did so for what seemed like an eternity until you felt two arms encircle your shoulders and firmly grasp you.

Knowing it was Billie, you attempted to shake her off of you like she was a parasite, but your body was too weak from crying, so you just sobbed more in frustration when you realized there was no way to get rid of her.

“I’m sorry.”

You were filled with even more pain when she spoke those words, knowing that no matter how hard she tried to change things for the better, it would never work out. Although your thoughts strayed to all of your previous arguments and how mentally exhausted they left you, you still wanted to think that she could change for the better.

Billie withdrew and longingly gazed into your eyes as you sniffed, "You should go."

"I can't live without you Y/N," Billie vowed.

You cupped her face, wiping a tear from her cheek with your thumb, and said, "It's what's best for the both of us—you and I both know it."

Billie gazed into your eyes for a considerable amount of time, and for a long moment there was silence—it was like you two were communicating only by making eye contact.

“Goodbye Y/N.”

You refused to give Billie a glance and instead focused on your nails until you heard the front door close, which indicated that she had left.

You slept with a cold spot next to you and an empty mind after that, hoping that Billie would eventually own up to her mistakes and return to complete each other's lives...

[witchthewriter]

𝐁𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐨𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐜𝐡 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐒𝐭𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐬 𝐬/𝐨 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐥𝐮𝐝𝐞

⤷ gender neutral, ambiguous race, and any size reader. Requests are open, thank you for reading!  

a/n: all characters are over the age of 18! :)

ᴹᵃˢᵗᵉʳˡᶤˢᵗ      

ENTP

Ravenclaw

Chaotic Good

Gemini Sun, Aries Moon, Aquarius Rising

𝑺𝑭𝑾🌿

・You’re light in not only Stiles’ life, but the whole group. 

・They come to you when life feels too much. 

・You’re there with the kettle on, ready to hear their problems and read their tea leaves

・There’s always an animal worming their way around your legs, either a cat or one of your dogs

・You adopt as many animals as you can, usually from Alan Deaton, the vet. 

・Scott likes you because you bring a sense of calm to Stiles’ chaos

・And Stiles didn’t realise he had a crush on you until Scott pointed it out.

・You constantly have to bring Stiles back down to earth. His mind is constantly racing and thinking about the next problem

・Stiles couldn’t help but fall in love with you. You were always so kind to him. When everyone else thought he was ‘too much’, you couldn’t get enough

・ It was your smile that did it for Stiles. That sweet, sometimes mischievous smile. 

・You originally thought Stiles was one of those sceptics that brushed the existence of magic as mere fiction

・But Stiles was the first one to believe in your witchcraft:

     “We have werewolves, Banshees and god knows what else. A witch seems the most realistic.”

・When the group doesn’t have any leads, they come to you for help. It’s not easy being a witch. It uses a lot of energy. You can do locating spells, but it drains you a lot

・Stiles hates coming to you for help because he knows how much it physically costs you 

・Some teenagers like to graffiti your home - but they can only do it once. You’ve cast a spell so whoever tries to do it again loses their ability to talk normally

・It also means you know who’s been doing it

・Because parents panic and news always travels around town, the graffiti is next to non-existent now (also because Stiles makes sure to clean it off before you notice)

・He can be very, very stubborn. And often thinks he knows what is best. 

・But he’s also ... very honest. So you know when he’s lying (he’s so bad at it):

     “Stiles...tell me the truth.”

“The truth is ... that ... I ... am...- okay god stop looking at me like that.”

・Likes cuddling A LOT. But is fussy, and if he can’t get perfectly comfortable, then he wants to be the little spoon.

・Is a really heavy sleeper, and whenever he stays over at your place he’s the last to wake up

・LOVES when you make his favourite food. Literally falls in love, not even being dramatic. His mind is like ‘this is the one. I’m keeping them.’

・Loyal to. a. fault. Will die for you, will do everything in his power to keep you safe and out of danger. That’s another reason why he doesn’t like getting you involved in the supernatural stuff. 

・You know exactly what he’s thinking, because you can see it clearly on his face. 

・ “Stiles, do you tell my secrets to Scott?” 

“Ugh, not the really secretive ones?”

・Sheriff Stilinksi loves you, he thinks you’re great for Stiles. You make his chaos less ... chaotic. He was a bit apprehensive about your witchcraft at first, but then he had the same outlook as Stiles. “At least you’re not a ...hellhound or something.”

・Stiles NEVER fails to make you laugh 

・You find the most random things in his car. Ducktape, a metal baseball bat, keys to many, many buildings, rope. You asked him if he had a first aid kit, since he had everything else, and his eyes glazed over. 

   “I KNEW I was forgetting something. God!” 

・You make protection amulets for him, and give him crystals. He doesn’t understand but takes them wholeheartedly anyway

・His favourite crystals are labradorite (”because I like when it shines, duh”), malachite and blue tiger’s eye 

・Vending machines are his mortal enemy and if he sees one he forbids you from using it (you use it anyway)

・Having weekly meals at his father’s place 

・You were really really good friends with Allison, and her death was heavy for you. 

・Adores going to metaphysical stores with you. He picked out a deck of tarot cards (wants to pay but you never let him. So he tries to gift you as many things as you’ll need, so he can buy them)

𝑯𝒊𝒔 𝑷𝒆𝒕 𝑵𝒂𝒎𝒆 𝑭𝒐𝒓 𝒀𝒐𝒖: You’d think he would be very open with nicknames for you. But he’s very embarrassed by it. Not embarrassed of you, but of showing you verbal affection. After being in a stable relationship for a while, he would start calling you names like ‘sweetheart,’ or ‘honey’, especially when you weren’t listening to his warnings

𝑯𝒊𝒔 𝑳𝒐𝒗𝒆 𝑳𝒂𝒏𝒈𝒖𝒂𝒈𝒆: Physical Touch and Words of Affirmation. He’s always on the go and can feel like you aren’t a part of his world. But you always make sure to leave little trinkets in his pockets or in his car. 

𝑻𝒉𝒆𝒎𝒆 𝑺𝒐𝒏𝒈:

Romantic Flight by John Powell

𝑹𝒆𝒍𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒑 𝑻𝒓𝒐𝒑𝒆𝒔:

Chaotic Dumbass (Stiles) x Oh God That’s My Chaotic Dumbass (You)

Gifts Rocks As Gifts x Takes The Rocks Without Question

Talks A Lot (Stiles) x Likes To Listen (You)

 𝑹𝒐𝒎𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒄 𝑷𝒍𝒐𝒕 𝑻𝒓𝒐𝒑𝒆:

It’s Always Been You

[hrefna-the-raven]

Connected through the Force

Masterlist

Words: 1826

Warnings: smut (18+), sex

Summary:

Beware of game spoilers! (sort of) This is a slightly different version of who Cal Kestis will find in the kolto tank on Koboh.

Cal paced up and down in his room in Pyloon's Saloon, his mind racing at an impossible speed in a desperate attempt to get a hold of what happened today in the chamber at the abandoned Jedi Temple. For whatever insane reasons, the Jedi of the High Republic decided to keep a Sith alive, locked up in a kolto tank in a forgotten temple. He could feel it and yet his hand reached out and touched the glass before his natural caution could prevent him. The moment his fingertips touched the cold glass, a hand from inside the tank appeared, seemingly trying to touch his and a strange connection in the Force bound him to the woman in the tank. He saw her memories, how she killed many Jedis, how she failed to proceed with killing master Khri and instead joined her and became her padawan. He even felt her internal struggle during all those years, being constantly torn between the light and the dark, never able to fully leave the dark side behind her. She committed unspeakable crimes, excelled at defying the impossible with the goodness in her tainted heart and it was all part of Cal's mind now, the images never fainting as he tried to understand it all. He could feel her rage, her love, her sadness, her raw lust, all connected to him now, entangling with his own soul, tainting his mind and plaguing it with a constant desire for this woman that he knew he should never surrender to.

You shifted restlessly as you paced back and forth in the saloon's main room. The memory of the Jedi who had freed you from the kolto tank was constantly replaying in your mind like a broken holo-recorder. His calm, measured presence had been the only thing bringing you back and anchoring you to reality as you drifted in and out of consciousness for many many years, delirious with anger and a saddening pain. But as the hours passed and the fog of your memories and emotions cleared, a strange feeling began to emerge within you. At first, you tried to ignore it, dismissing it as a side effect of the kolto treatment and the confusion caused by being trapped in it for so long, but the feeling only grew stronger and more persistent, until you could no longer deny its existence. You were in love with the Jedi. It was a ridiculous notion, of course. You once were a Sith Lord, a merciless killer who turned to the light side of the force under the guidance of master Khri, with a past like that, steeped in darkness and bloodshed, ending in the dedication to do good and abstaining from all attachments, the very notion of love or desire for him felt almost ridiculous and like a failure. He was a Jedi, a paragon of light and virtue, sworn to uphold the peace and protect the innocent. Despite your will to do good, the two of you were as different as night and day, and yet, the force had connected you in a way that defied all logic. It was maddening, this attraction that had taken hold of you. It consumed your thoughts, your dreams, your every waking moment. The mere thought of him finally touching you without the restraint of a glass wall sent sparks coursing through your whole body, igniting a desire that you had never known before. You stormed off downstairs and entered his room, stopping just a step in front of him, your finger dangerously poking at his chest.

"Cal we-"

"need to talk!", he interrupted you, his fingers wrapping around your wrist, rimpling the fabric of tunic as he held your hand up.

"I've been a Jedi, trying to good all those years under the guidance of master Khri", you exclaimed, trying to mask the rising anger in your voice, "so stop messing with my mind, get out of there!"

"You've been the one trying to invade my mind with your twisted games, Sith!", Cal huffed, his grip tightening.

"I have not!", your eyes wandered to his lips, lingering as you tried to ignore the rising heat in your core.

A nervous but delightful wave of desire washed over Cal's entire body. The way your eyes darted between his and his mouth kindled a fire within him that he never felt before. He was no stranger to desire but until now, he was always confident and strong enough to not fall for any temptation but, for the first time in his entire life, he felt his resistance faltering. Your presence rendered him weak and it felt too good to fight it.

"The force", you mumbled in a low voice.

"You felt the connection too?", Cal asked hesitantly.

You nodded, unable even form a simple yes as you slowly surrendered to the pull towards the Jedi. Cal seemed to feel the same as he suddenly pulled you closer, your body pressing on his as his lips crashed on yours, one hand still holding your wrist as the other snuck around your waist holding you trapped on him as you both lost yourselves in the heated kiss. Cal was the first to break the kiss, both of you panting. The space between you felt heavy, still holding you close, Cal felt the unspoken desire absorbing every inch of his body and mind. He was always taught to trust in the force, not opposing but letting himself guide through its will and he was determined to be guided again this time, there had to be a good reason for all of this and he craved to solve the mystery but right now, he needed to give in, he needed to connect with you, not just through the force but also physically, he wanted to merge with you. Your heart raced almost painfully as you were unable to avert your gaze from Cal. The glow of his copper hair, his deep emerald eyes, chiming perfectly with his pale skin, took your breath away. Your free hand moved to his heaving chest and you slowly let the force seeping through, pushing Cal towards the bed. In a split second you were upon him, straddling him as your hands lifted his shirt over his head.

"You're tempting me, Sith", Cal breathed, his voice raspy and oozing with desire.

"I'm not a Sith, Jedi", you whispered, grinding your hips on him.

A dark groan escaped Cal's throat as his fingers dug into the soft skin of your hips. You felt the bulge forming in his pants as you kept on rubbing against him, barely able to restrain yourself from moaning loudly. You could feel your wetness polling between your legs, pressing your hips harder on him in a desperate attempt to gain more friction. In a swift sudden movement Cal flips you over, your back hitting the mattress, one hand pressed on your stomach to keep you in place while his other hand ripped your pants off, tearing the fabric in the process as it fell down in pieces to the ground. His head pushed your legs apart, his soft hair tingling the skin on the inside of your thighs, as he ran his tongue along your wet folds, earning a lustful moan from you.

"I want you", Cal whispered, your name leaving his lips in a husky breath.

You spread your legs further, your hand resting on his on your stomach, your head falling back, eyes shutting tight as the feeling of his finger suddenly entering you. Your walls tightened around his finger as he keeps thrusting into you at a slow pace.

"Cal", you moaned, "I need-"

"More", he interrupted you, his eyes fixed on your beautiful frame drowning in the pleasure he provided.

The jedi unbuckled his belt and pushed his pants down, his hard member twitching as he moved the tip of it to your entrance. Your hips bucked against him, trying to feel more of him and groaned frustrated as his tight hold on your stomach held you in place.

"Are...", Cal hesitated for a second, unsure if such a question should even be asked by someone like him, "are you sure? Of this?"

"We're already connected", you answered, your voice almost silent but filled with confidence, "trust in the will of the force, Cal. I...I want...need you Cal", you moaned softly.

Cal shoved himself inside you, both of his hands moving to your hips and pulling you closer. The sudden wave of pleasure rushed your entire being as he filled you and sinful moans escaped your lips. Cal mewled your name like a prayer as he kept pounding into you, slowly at first but as the passion pushed him closer to the edge, conquering every part of his mind, he picked up the pace, thrusting in and out with all the force his body could bring up. You set his entire being ablaze, whatever resolution he once held dear drowning in the raging sea of lust. He wanted to feel bad, wanted to turn this into a mistake he could get over but it was impossible. The force had bound him to you and no matter what the order once taught him, merging his soul and body with you were all that mattered now, nothing ever felt this right. The lewd sounds of your bodies slapping unto each other as Cal kept pounding you entangling with his groans and your salacious whines pushed both of you over the edge, waves of ecstatic bliss washing over you as Cal filled you up, your walls clenching around his throbbing cock. Cal's body collapsed on top of you, breathing heavily as his dick was still buried in your dripping hole. Your hand found its way to Cal's head, your fingers brushing softly through his hair, your chest heaving in a silent chuckle.

"What?", Cal lifted his head, a pair of content eyes staring at you.

"I never thought that", your hands moved around, gesturing wildly at you and him,"this would ever happen to me."

This was the first time that you witnessed the red-haired jedi smile. The corners of his mouth moved into a genuinely happy grin, his eyes radiating a contagious happiness, warming your heart as all the sadness and anger of the last years washed away. Whatever your destiny was, whatever the force had planned for you, in this very moment the warmth of the certainty of what you felt for Cal spread through every fiber of you and you knew that, despite still suffering from all your past mistakes, if they had lead up to this, to having Cal in your life, deeply connected to you, made you feel perfectly worthy for the first time since you became a jedi and you were confident to head on with your life, helping Cal in his quest to help fight against the Empire and save others like you.

[whumpshaped]

a thought : Something so awful happening to beck one evening it makes them almost welcome helle with open arms in comparison (bonus points if even they're worried)

masterlist

tw vampire carewhumper, emotional whump, mugging mention, knives mention, death threats mention, subtle mind control, conditioning, conditioned whumpee

Beck stumbled into his apartment still sobbing, clutching his bag like his life depended on it. What else? What else could go wrong in his stupid fucking life? He had one vampire constantly pestering him, he'd had another try to bite him, and now he got mugged? There had to be something wrong with him. This wasn't normal. He had to be cursed.

He leaned back against the locked door, taking panicked little breaths until he felt like he could move again. He should've gone to the police. He'd just been too scared to do so, the cold touch of a knife still lingering on his neck where it'd nicked him.

He instinctively tried to reach for his phone to call his mom — only to realise that had been taken from him, along with all the money from his wallet and his credit card. At least the guy was nice enough to let him keep his papers.

He wanted Helle.

The thought made him cry even more. He was so shaken, so utterly terrified, and he wanted the vampire? He was losing his mind. But really, who else was going to raise hell for someone wasting 'his precious blood'? Who else was going to visit him at night without having to be called? He had no one else. Nobody would even believe him at this point, there were simply too many bad things happening to him one after the other. People were getting tired of him, he could tell.

Helle wasn't. Helle came back every single night, let him ramble, sat in the kitchen while he cooked, joined in enthusiastically whenever he complained about Christie or work, held him after he woke up from the nightmares they'd caused... They were all he had right now, as sad as it was.

Yeah, because you stopped calling your family as often. You're getting tangled up in the magic they apparently 'never use on you'.

He pushed the thought aside. He didn't have the energy for it. His heart was still racing, he still felt lightheaded and detached, and if his pathetically frightened mind wanted nothing but to run into Helle's arms, well... tonight wasn't the night when he'd rationalise his way out of it.

It didn't take long. Barely ten minutes after he'd finally torn himself away from the door and set his bag on the dresser, Helle walked in, their usual cheery demeanour instantly clashing with the fearful atmosphere in the room. Their red eyes settled on his shaking figure, and Beck found he couldn't even explain anything; all that came out were choked little whimpers, making even the vampire reconsider their evening plans.

"Oh, dear." They slowly walked over to the sofa, concern evident on their face. "What happened?"

Without saying a word, Beck's hands shot out to grab onto Helle's shirt, and they sat down so he could properly cling to them. They wrapped both arms around his frail body, letting him cry it out for as long as he wanted.

"S-someone stole my stuff," he sniffled. "My– my phone, my money– he put a knife t-to, to my throat– said he'd kill me–"

"Poor thing," they murmured, and for once, it sounded genuine. It was all Beck wanted to hear. To know that they did care, and his stupid love that he'd tried to hard to sweep under the rug wasn't entirely misplaced. "Do you want me to go and get your things back, darling? Or do you want me to stay?"

"Stay," he said right away. "Please. 'm s-so scared, I d-don't wanna be alone, I–"

"Shh, alright." They began gently rocking him back and forth, whispering sweet nothings until he calmed down. Beck thought it'd take longer. He thought he'd be crying all night, driving Helle up the wall, yet here he was, quiet and exhausted in their arms after mere minutes.

Like magic, right? They have to be using something. This isn't normal. No vampire puts a human at ease naturally.

He was too tired to care. All he could focus on was the gentle way they'd asked for his preference, the way they were willing to stay with him instead of immediately going on a vengeful hunt through the city. The way they would've gone if he'd asked them to. They were all he had, and they were so much more than enough.

"Feeling better?" Their voice felt like silk against his skin, soft and smooth and so light.

"Yeah," he whispered. "Thank you. S-sorry for... all of this." Despite saying that, he made no effort to push himself away from them. They didn't urge him either.

"No need. Just breathe."

He did. He could finally take deep breaths as opposed to the shallow gasping from before, and it felt nice, like a weight had been lifted. Even being reminded made him feel so warm inside, like he wasn't a bother, like... like he was allowed to just breathe. Like Helle truly expected nothing else from him.

"Thank you," he repeated, emphatic and reverent. It felt good to give into the gratitude instead of fighting it, to simply express his feelings instead of trying to hide them out of embarrassment. "Thank you for staying."

Helle kissed the top of his head. "How could I not, when a sweet thing like you begs me to?"

Sweet thing... It was probably just the sudden lack of adrenaline leaving him sleepy and stupid, but for a long moment, he thought he liked being Helle's sweet thing.

~

taglist: @whumpsday @the-scrapegoat @hidden-dreamland @dismemberment-on-a-tuesday-night @delicateprincepaper @whumppmuhw @florissimps @nicolepascaline @oliversrarebooks @the-cyrulik @pirefyrelight @there-will-always-be-blood @pigeonwhumps @echo-goes-mmm @whumpycries @morning-star-whump @d-cs @watermelons-dont-grow-on-trees @tauntedoctopuses @blueyellow8green @typewrittenfangs @whumpsoda @steh-lar-uh-nuhs

[reidsaurora]

"Kisses Make Everything Better" ~ S. Reid

Summary: Spencer and Y/N get taken hostage, he goes into sensory overload and they have to help him through it.

Pairing: Autistic!Spencer Reid x GN!Reader (i'm p sure no pronouns are used)

Word Count: 1,195

Content Warning: Y/N and Spencer do be kidnapped, mentions of guns, minor character death, mentions of hospitals, sensory overload/overstimulation, very mild swearing, lmk if i missed anything!

Genre: Angst to Fluff, Hurt/Comfort

Extra Notes: another crappy summary but i promise the imagine is written much better

Based On the Prompt: "Hair's Breadth from Death" - gun to temple (from 2022 Whumptober Prompts)

Originally Written: 10/07/2022

Beta Read By: @dungeons-are-too-cold and @theghouligan

Criminal Minds masterlist can be found here!

Whumptober masterlist/schedule can be found here!

════ ⋆★⋆ ════

"Where did you take him?" she growled, grip tight around the gun in her hand.

"For the last time, Ruby, we don't know where your son is," I huffed. "Oliver was placed in foster care after your arrest. We don't know where he went or if he even has the same name."

My eyes darted over to Spencer. His chest heaved, tears brimmed his eyes, and his leg bounced as best it could through the restraints around his ankles.

I could tell Spencer was headed toward sensory overload, most likely caused by both the flex cuffs around his wrists and ankles and the volume of her shouting. One of Spencer's many sensory triggers was plastic, the texture he hated most. He had a couple sensory overload tells, but his most dominant tell was his fidgeting leg.

My face softened as I looked over him. I craved Spencer's touch constantly, but when I saw him in situations like this, I wanted to wrap him up tight and prove to him that things would be OK.

Ruby must've noticed my look of sympathy, prompting her to shout, "Hey, don't look at him! Look at me!"

My eyes flickered over to her, watching as she paced. Her face contorted from a look of anger to a look of curiosity as she paced over to Spencer.

"If you won't tell me where Ollie is," she said, sliding a singular bullet into the chamber, "then I'll just have to make you tell me."

Click!

"Ruby, don't do this," I pleaded. "What will Oliver think of his mother when he finds out she killed a federal agent?"

Spencer's chest heaved five times harder than it already was. "Please," he managed weakly, tears sliding down his cheeks.

"Tell me where he is."

I couldn’t take it anymore. "Ruby, I already told you a hundred times-"

Click!

"Y/N, please make her stop!" Spencer begged.

My mind raced as I attempted to find some way to calm them both. I thought through my options, trying to find something to give me leverage over her.

I knew I shouldn't, it was the one thing Spencer hated telling people about himself, but I knew it might work. I knew it might make Ruby take a step back and consider her son. "Ruby, he has autism."

She pressed the barrel to his skin, surely hard enough to cause an imprint. "No, he doesn't. You're lying."

"I'm not lying. He has autism, just like Oliver," I told her. "He’s going into sensory overload. You wouldn't do that to Oliver, would you? So please don’t do it to Spencer either."

She scoffed, her eyes rolling sarcastically. "You're just saying that so I'll feel bad."

"It's true," Spencer whimpered, "I got diagnosed last year, not long after you lost Oliver."

Click!

"Tell me where Ollie is," she demanded once more, still holding the gun close to Spencer's forehead.

"I already told you a million times, Ruby. We don't-"

"'Know where he is.' Yeah, I know. We've been over that song and dance before," she antagonized. "I'll put the gun down when you tell me where my son is."

I rolled my eyes at her, throwing my head back in frustration. "You wanna know where he is, Ruby?"

Her eyes lit up, her expression filled with sarcasm. "I was wondering when you'd get the message."

My eyes narrowed as she walked closer to me. I leaned up close to her face once she was close enough. "He's living with a nice family who could take way better care of him than your sorry ass ever could," I spat. "He's living with a nice family where the mom isn't a hit woman and the dad is actually in the picture."

BOOM!!!

My ears rang as a gunshot sounded off throughout the room. My eyes screwed shut as tears slid down my face.

"Are you two OK?" I heard a familiar voice ask from across the room.

I slowly opened my eyes, spotting Rossi and Morgan as they walked over to untie us. My mouth fell agape as I registered the fact that Spencer was still alive and breathing. "You're OK," I managed through shallow breaths.

"I'm OK," he confirmed. "What about you?"

Once Rossi had successfully untied me and Morgan had untied Spencer, we rushed over to each other, falling into each other's arms. "I'm OK now," I answered.

Spencer kept his distance during the ambulance ride to the hospital. Luckily, I was able to plead with the driver to keep the siren turned off for Spencer's sake, though I could tell the flashing of the light did nothing to ease his overstimulation.

Once we reached the hospital, I stayed close enough to Spencer to let him know I wasn't leaving his side. The nurse allowed me to share an exam room with him too after I explained our situation.

The room stayed mostly silent, save for us answering the doctors' questions. Spencer's heart rate was still extremely high, probably the result of him having difficulties with calming down after such high stakes situations.

Slowly, I stood from my seat, sitting down beside him on the exam table. "Are you OK?" I whispered.

He nodded slowly, avoiding eye contact with me. "Hey, do you think Rossi and Morgan heard what you said? A-about my diagnosis, I mean."

I exhaled, attempting to figure out how to answer his question. "I'm not sure."

"You don't think they'll make fun of me, do you?" he asked, his volume matching that of mine. "I don't want them to think I'm less capable in the field now that everyone's suspicions have been confirmed."

I held my hand close to his face, not touching him quite yet. "May I?"

He swallowed hard, but nodded nonetheless.

I pressed my hand to his cheek, wiping the remnants of his tears. "No one is going to think you're less capable. And if they did, I'd beat their ass for being ableist."

He cracked a small smile, his eyes finally fluttering up to meet mine. "Thank you."

"I love you, Spencer. I would've never said that if I hadn't thought it would help the situation. I thought telling her about your diagnosis might make her take a step back and think about her actions," I explained. "I'm sorry it didn't work as well as I'd hoped."

"I love you too," he whispered, leaning into my touch.

The room stayed silent for a moment, a comfortable silence I'd craved ever since we'd been taken hostage in the first place. I listened to his breathing, feeling a sense of serenity wash over me as I heard shallow breaths turn into deeper, calmer breaths.

"Y/N?" he spoke again after a couple minutes.

"Hmm?" I hummed, still running my thumb across the soft skin of his cheek.

"Can you kiss me?" he asked, his eyes immediately darting away. "I think it might help distract me."

I gave him a soft smile before leaning in, placing my lips on his. His lips were slightly cracked and dry, but I didn't care.

"Thank you," he whispered as he broke away.

"Of course," I smiled. "Kisses make everything better."

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i don't wanna talk about how much i hate the title of this aldjslshsksgajs

you know what i do wanna talk about tho? how much i love georgia and gracie 🫶🏻

bc they both saw the potential in this fic and gave me so many pointers on making this better for you guys. i just wanna give them both a lil shoutout. love u guys 🥰

════ ⋆★⋆ ════

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[the-fluff-piece]

OMGG CONGRATS ON YOUR 200 FOLLOWERS, I LOVE YOU TOO 🥺😭💖

so... I have a really low self-esteem and my mind always makes me think I'm unworthy or don't deserve a lot of things I have in life

that being said, could I request prompt 1- sweet/ cozy with Ace? Pretty please? (the thought of him putting his hat on our heads makes me feel so warm inside 🥺 can you maybe include this, please?)

again, congratulations on your milestone, I love you & your writing and i'll be here to accompany you on this journey 🥰💖

Hello my dearest, you're the best 🥺 I am so happy that you're still here, you're so precious (I'm not crying, you're crying 😭)

So I hope you like this story, I tried to make it positive and uplifting

This is part of my follower milestone event

Here's

Love sick

You've been with the whitebeard pirates for quite some time now and your secret crush for Ace is growing constantly- until something needs to be done!

This is pure sfw heartwarming superfluff about Ace being super supportive and taking care of a super anxious and shy gender neutral reader

At this point, it was an open secret everyone knew about, except Ace. Every time you saw him you froze, everytime you tried to talk to him your voice gave out, everyone with half a brain cell could see that you loved him, except Ace. There is still a debate what that makes him intellectually.

You've come to a point when your crush turned from delicious butterflies in your stomach to a painful hum of constant anxiety in your head. The idea that he would never see you, never return your feelings and probably end up with a much better girl was so excruciating to you, it was making it hard to sleep or eat. Or concentrate. It became so bad that one day, you found yourself being pushed into Marco's office because you fell asleep at your post. You where sitting there miserably while he did some superficial examinations and asking question about your symptoms.

"Have you lost your appetite?" He asked.

"Not really" you lied. He didn't need to know that.

"I'm gonna add denial to your symptoms because just from looking at you I can tell you lost weight."

"Uhm...ok" you conceded. Maybe, you still felt too fat though.

"You know Ace is a nice guy" Marco stated matter of factly.

You got dizzy from the sudden rise in blood pressure this name caused.

"I know that!" You squeaked.

"Than why are you acting like telling him how you feel is dangerous? Even if he didn't return your feelings, he'd be super chill about it." Marco said with his usual calm expression, while you were almost fainting from embarrassment. "Yeah, everyone knows, don't panic." Sitting down at his desk he added "that's my counsel to improve your health: talk to Ace. Tell him how you feel. Get drunk if it helps you." He turned around, telling you that this appointment was over.

With a head as red as a a tomato and swaying a bit from all the heart racing you got out of Marco's office and had to sit down for a second.

"Hey Y/n!" A familiar voice greeted you. Sick to your stomach, you turned around, saying "goodbye" to Ace before you realized you took the wrong greeting again. You told him good night in the morning and once you even wished him happy birthday at lunch.

As usual, Ace laughed loudly, throwing his head back. Just seeing his freckles in the sunlight was heartbreaking.

"Your so funny" he chuckled and paused, looking from you to Marco's office.

"Are you sick? You look a bit feverish!" He noted, coming nearer and looking you straight in the face, studying you. You were torn between looking away because you were looking like a complete mess and staring at his handsome face. Your eyes decided to look both ways at the same time, giving you a headache. You closed your eyes and prayed that Ace would just leave so you wouldn't embarrass yourself even more.

He didn't leave. Instead, you felt a warm hand on your forehead and his voice near your face "your temperature is a bit high. Did you see Marco?" Ace asked with concern.

"See him just I did" you mumbled(grammatically wrong) and risked a peek at Ace, who looked really worried.

To your horror, he sat down next to you.

"Man, being sick sucks! Just let me know if I can do anything for you." He said, looking at you as you tried to vanish. He shouldn't see how absolutely messy and horrible you looked.

"Nothing" you managed to say.

"Y/n, you always play so tough but it's okay to ask for help. We are a crew after all!" His excitement whenever he talked about the whitebeard pirates was so cute, you had to smile, wishing you could talk to him the same way.

"You know what? Here's something to remind you that you're never alone here!" He said with the broadest, most adorable smile that almost made you melt - and put his hat on your head. It was a bit too wide and slid over your eyes and you quickly adjusted it. It smelled like leather and campfire - Ace's scent.

"Damn!" Ace whistled. "Looks better on you than on me. I guess it's your hat now."

He was so nice, even if it was lie to make you feel better.

"That's not true" you said and had to laugh a bit.

"You know it's a shame we never get to talk to each other like this, you're always so busy! How about you just lie down and rest and I bring you dinner and keep you company later."

"Wha- wha-?" You stutter.

"You heard me, I'll bring you some soup later!" He said as he left, waving.

"You promise me you'll rest!" He added.

Your knees were butter and you just stayed put, trying to catch your breath.

"Wow, just like that you have a date?" Marco commented, having witnessed the whole strange exchange.

"No!" You snapped.

"I thought you wanted this...?" He asked.

"Yes! I mean no, I mean this isn't a date!" With once again solid knees you got up and turned to get back to your post.

"Where do you think you're going?" Marco asked, a brow raised.

"Back to work." You answered.

"I don't think so. Your commanding officer just ordered you to rest in your bed and wait for him." He said with a "checkmate" expression on his face.

You would never disobey a direct order, so you went back to your room, clutching Ace's hat to your chest and prayed he would just forget his promise.

He didn't.

After waiting anxiously for a few hours, you heard him come. You were already so attuned to his steps and looks that you could always detect his presence.

He didn't bother knocking, he just shouted: "Soup coming!" And already opened the door with his foot.

"Hot and healthy! And tasty of course!" He announced with a wide grin, holding a tablet with soup, some bread and a spoon in one hand like an expert waiter. He looked at you - and frowned. You were sure he just noticed what a wreck you were. Instead he said: "you're not wearing comfy pajamas! Don't you know anything about being sick?" He sounded like it was common knowledge.

"I am not feeling that bad..." you explained.

"Marco told me you were feeling really bad! So it must be true." He stated. You felt the panic rise in your throat - what else did Marco tell him?

Your anxiety levels rose once again when he sat down next to you on your bed and put the tablet on your nightstand, you've never been that near to him. Unconsciously, you clutched his hat to your chest like a shield.

"Hats go on your head, silly!" He said playfully and put it back on your head.

"And now open up" he ordered as he lifted a full spoon in front of your face while holding his other hand underneath it to catch any drops.

"I can eat by myself!" You told him a bit more sharply than intended and immediately regretted it. Ace laughed.

"They told me that you have spunk! But orders are orders" he said with a sinister expression. Marco taught him that, too, you bet. But he was right, orders were orders and you opened your mouth. Ace was surprisingly careful.

"You know, you can take a break from time time" he began in a casual tone while feeding you. You barely tasted the soup, being cared for by Ace was taking up all your available attention. He continued talking calmly:

"I see how hard you work each day, that you're always thinking ahead, keeping an eye on things. All I want to say is: being a pirate also means to have fun once in a while. You're pushing yourself so hard, and I bet you're struggling, too. You need to enjoy yourself once in a while. Or let others help you." His concern was so sweet and genuine, it almost made you cry.

"You know you deserve it." He ended and looked at you. "And I'm glad you let me help you. I know sometimes, that's hard. In that regard, you remind me of someone. He also puts others first when they need help, an he does absolutely everything to help everyone, even people that hurt him. And like him, you're very strong" he said and seemed to remember someone dear to him.

"You feeling better now?" He asked, suddenly back in the moment.

You nod.

"Great! Marco said when you've had some soup I should give you this" he said cheerfully and produced a small flask from his satchel.

"It's medicine." He held out the small, unmarked bottle. You opened it and immediately smelled your favourite booze. That dog! You hesitated and looked at the flask.

"He said it's crucial."

"I bet" your voice was so dry you were surprised you didn't spew dust. There was an evil plot against you led by Marco. If you were in a position to do so you would pay it back to him.

"Less scowling more drinking" Ace said, ripping you from your thoughts of dark conspiracies against your love life (or absence thereof). It was just a small flask, you drank it in a few sips, already feeling it going to your head. Maybe you were indeed sick.

Ace sat at your side and was smiling widely, watching you like he expected a present. Remembering Marco's words, this was probably a message that it was time to confess. You were a little afraid that he would take matters into his own hands if you didn't tell Ace here and now.

Everything inside of you was fighting against it. He wouldn't like you back. This would hurt. Everyone would laugh at you for weeks. You tried thinking about it like a band aid, it needed to be ripped off swiftly to avoid long stretched pain. It was also the most dignified way to make it public.

"Thank you for taking care of me, but I am not sick. I just..." your voice is being a coward again, but you press on while Ace is waiting patiently. "I was just really stressed and nervous today because I.." your throat was dry and it felt like your heart was besting sk hard that it was shaking your whole body.

"I love you" you whisper. And add "I'm sorry".

Ace didn't flinch or look surprised.

"I know" he whispered back. "Don't ever be sorry for your feelings. And don't be afraid. You know it pays to be brave sometimes." His low voice was hard to understand over the beating of your heart. You felt his hot breath on your hear as he moved closer and planted a soft kiss on your hair. His hand moved to stroke the side of your face with his fingers.

"I love you, too. And I am proud that you told me first." He said softly while his fingers moved underneath your chin to lift your head up.

"I'm just afraid I'm not a great kisser." He said, chuckling.

"Me neither" you answer.

Still, just feeling his lips on yours for the first time was the greatest thing ever.

________

[stinkyme]

I need recovery after angsty Mushitaro🥲

Can I please request Fluffy fic with Mushitaro, with an almost-a-toddler son who loves to pull and messed up his neat glossy hair? But throws a tiny tantrum if anyone ruffles/messed up the kid's hair.

Mainly likes to mess with Mushi especially when s/o's not looking, often like a little heart attack(ex: him trying to push down a glass of water from the table to break it, pulling hard on his bow tie, etc)

Hello dear anon! I hope your day is going well and of course you can :D

I hope I understood well because I am not sure do you mean Mushitaro likes to mess up kid's hair but gets annoyed when someone else do it, however I will write multiple things about it hoping I get the one you meant, I apologize if I misunderstood :")

Thank you for your request and I hope I will do it justice :)

CW/TW: none, kid being a little sweet asshole <3, GN!Reader, it's fluffy

I also apologize for any mistakes in advance :)

Mushitaro Oguri as stressed dad || GN!Reader as S/O

Mushitaro and you were enjoying your family life, with an almost toddler son, constantly having new adventures and raising him to be a good person. However, your little angel was often little heart attack for Mushitaro.

As you would do something, shower or prepare a meal and left two of them to entertain each other and spend time together, your little boy would use an opportunity to stress out Oguri as much as he could.

He would ask to be on his lap, all innocent and angelic, looking for cuddles. Mushitaro was smiling, picking up his beloved son and placing him on his lap to earn flushed cheeks and beloved giggles from the boy. He would be calm for a little while, truly an angel. But as soon as Oguri would pay slightly more attention to TV or something else, boy would suddenly grab his bow harshly, pulling it towards, almost breaking Mushi's neck. They said don't doubt a child's strenght for a good reason.

Mushitaro choked out, shocked at sudden pain and force.

"Hey, hey! No pulling! Do you want to break my neck?" he said a bit shocked and boy looked at him, eyes wide and started to giggle out.

"Hm, you want to see it, huh?" Mushitaro asked and took off his bow to give a curious little one so he can inspect it.

His small hands took it, turning it around, mouth slightly open and he had no thoughts behind those eyes. But, he did have that usual baby mischief. Boy started stretching out his little arm towards the glass on the table that contained orange juice. He tried to dip it inside and Mushitaro saw just in the right moment, his heart racing, quickly pulling the boy away and taking bow out of his hand.

"No, no, we can't do that." he sighed out. Boy looked disappointed, but quickly found a new way to stress his dad out. He leaned forward, trying to grab the glass, resulting in glass moving around and almost falling off of the table. Once again, Mushi quickly saved something from getting ruined. He was sweating at this point. How something so small can stress him out so much? Boy looked at saved glass giggling, dipping his small fingers inside and slapping Mushitaro over the face with sticky fingers. Mushitaro blinked, it wasn't a weak slap mind you and he yelled out.

"Ouch! Hey!" his face was serious, he was offended by his own child slapping him.

Right after little boy decided to put his small hands on Mushitaro's face earning a warm smile from him.

"What are you scheming now?" Mushi said through small laugh, closing his eyes, boy pulling his hair suddenly, trying to get up.

"OUCH! OUCH! STOP IT!" Mushitaro yelled out in pain.

Boy clapped his hands, entertained and bumped his head into Mushitaro's chest, deciding to bite him. His teeth were small, but sharp. Mushitaro screamed out, moving away from child's bite. Boy kept giggling and moving his head around.

"Just you wait until Y/N comes! Mhm! You will see." he sighed out, keeping an eye on little boy who gave him innocent, puppy eyes and a wide smile.

"Hmph! Don't look at me like that, just you wait!" Mushitaro was "threating" him earning more giggles from the boy.

You came in the room and your kid quickly got off Mushi's lap messily rushing towards you. You bowed down, stretching your arms to meet him in a big hug. You picked him up, turning your back to Mushitaro, meanwhile little boy was looking over your shoulder. You swayed left and right, while boy was hugging you, his arms around your neck and he looked at Mushitaro, his tongue out, with a little smile. Boy was mocking him.

Mushitaro was shocked, once again. He raised an eyebrow at the boy.

"Oooo who is my little angel? You are, yes, you are!" you were singing to your baby boy, earning his giggles and little claps.

Mushitaro thought it would be funny if he did same thing back to him so he stick his tongue out. It resulted in a boy crying. Well, more like forcing it out to be as dramatic as his father was to earn more attention from you. As you turned around, you were dumbfounded at your husband "mocking" the baby. You consoled your boy, stroking his little head, giving warning look to Mushitaro.

"He did it first!" Oguri said in high pitched voice, trying to defend himself.

"Mushitaro Oguri! He is a baby, barely 2 years old! You are an adult. Behave yourself. There, there angel, was daddy mean towards you? I know." you scolded your husband in sharp voice, meanwhile comforting your child in soft, loving voice stroking his head and boy smiling back at you, happy with attention.

"You weren't here! He tried to knock off the glass, almost drowned my bow, pulled my hair AND BIT ME!" he said dramatically.

"Oh, poor you! He is a baby, of course he is going to explore stuff around him." you said, making sarcastic remark.

"More like destroy, hmph!" Mushitaro said, crossing his arms, scoffing.

"One more word and I will destroy you, you hear me?" you said in joking tone, child giggling in your arms.

"Maybe two of you need fresh air, how about you take him for a walk while I finish up what I started?" you looked at Mushitaro who was behaving like a bigger kid than your own.

"Fine. But if I don't come home, you know what happened to me!" he said as he got up, getting ready for a walk.

"Don't be so dramatic, it's a walk, not war. We took him on walks before and it was completely fine, he is just an energetic kid." you said through laughter and slowly put your baby boy down. He hugged Mushitaro's legs, looking up with a huge smile.

"But that was with you, he loves you more and listens to you. With me, he is different! It's like Jekyll and Hide! I am telling you Y/N!" he said, stroking his baby boy's hair. He really got Mushitaro's genes and soft, beautiful hair. Mushi loved playing with it, styling it and taking care of it.

"You did not just compare our child to that!" you laughed out.

"Also, it's not true, he adores you Mushitaro, look at him!" you said looking at your kid closing his eyes at Mushitaro's touch and hugging him thighter. Your kid adored both of you, he just enjoyed Mushitaro's dramatic, over the edge responses and expressions, you were more collected, calm one.

Mushitaro smiled softly at your child, messing his hair up to earn few giggles and kneeled down to pick him up and take him to the bathroom, taking good 20 minutes to style and brush boy's hair.

"You are almost as handsome as I am! Look how pretty your hair is." Mushitaro said jokingly, but second part was genuine. Boy was smiling to himself and Mushitaro in the mirror. They left the bathroom and Mushitaro put their shoes on.

Maybe walk will be good for both of them. You kissed them both goodbye on the cheek and returned to do things you had to do.

Mushitaro put boy down, taking his hand and going to a local park. He really loved this park, he loved you and your family. Boy also enjoyed the park, new faces, few animals, smell of flowers, birds singing, his dad holding his hand and talking about stuff he couldn't really understand yet, but loved sound of his voice, expressions and new things Mushitaro would show him.

Kid got distracted by a swing and as Mushitaro kept on and on about how they added new cherry tree and he can't wait until it blossoms so he can bring his boy here to experience such beauty, kid started running towards the swing, pulling away from Mushitaro's grip. Mushitaro stopped for a second, processing what happened and looking at his boy running towards the swing. He quickly ran after his kid, praying he won't fall down before he reaches him.

A kid bumped into stranger's legs, taking few small, messy steps back and looking up to meet some middle aged man gaze.

"Ah sorry sir! I got distracted for a second and he ran away, I am truly sorry." Mushitaro came up to them, apologizing to a man and looking at his boy. He kneeled down and started adjusting boy's shirt.

"You can't run off like that, you got me scared." Mushitaro said in serious tone.

"No! No! Please, I know what is like having kids, hahah! Minds of their own, it's okay! Good thing boy didn't get hurt, my knees will be fine!" man said laughing and went down to mess up boy's hair Mushitaro worked hard on. His gaze got serious, but he didn't say anything, boy's face confused. Man didn't seem to know his limit, at this point completely ruining his hair.

Mushitaro pulled away his boy gently.

"That will be enough from you! Thank you and sorry once again, we have to go!" Mushitaro said offended and serious, just who this man thought he was messing his boy's hair like that?

They came home.

"No Y/N! You don't understand, the audacity he had to ruin my boy's hair like that! People are truly a scum, jeez." he said as he was combing through boy's locks, annoyance all over his face.

"A crime, indeed! Next time sue him!" you said giggling at his story.

"Next time I will cut his fing.."

"Hey!" you yelled out.

"Fine, fine..you know what I mean, love." Mushitaro said calming down, you and your little boy giggling together.

The End :)

I hope you enjoyed this and had fun! I tried doing it justice, so hopefully I did. :D

Thank you for love and your request dear anon, it means a lot! :) <3

Kissing everyone on the forehead hehe

[eveistdiepommes]

do you have any cute gerita/itager headcanons?🇩🇪🤍🇮🇹

HIIIEEEEEE hiiieeeee :3

Yes!! Of course I do!! So, GerIta was my first ever ship in like anything! I was so captivated by their dynamic and how they interact in hetalia it made my heart flutter a lot!! I just can’t describe how giddy GerIta makes me!! ENOUGH BABBLING HERE ARE MY HEADCANONS!!!

(Keep in mind, a lot of these developed from my middle/high school interpretation!! So yeah!!)

My biggest headcanon for them is that Germany is Holy Rome! I know in more recent years Hima has denied this and what not, but a lot of it feels like back tracking to me?? Like it doesn’t add up with hints given earlier in the series?? Idk!! So, to this day I like to believe Germany is Holy Rome and he finally found Italy again!! It makes my younger middle school self happy!

Italy’s hands are always warm and Germany’s hands are always cold! I’m a sucker for these kinds of things!! I think Italy constantly takes Germany’s hands in his own to warm them up, and he peppers them with tons of kisses (which usually makes Germany flustered BAHAH)

A long standing headcanon l’ve had for specifically Italy is that he has some sort of tic disorder/tourettes. I was diagnosed with Tourette’s when I was 14, so you can see where this probably started BAHAH. But it makes sense from my point of view! He’s constantly moving around, singing and humming, etc etc. I also headcanon this specifically because of his “Ve” sound. This very much reads to me like a vocal tic, as I make similar noises. And thanks to Italy being one of my favorite characters, I have also adopted the “Ve” tic in my real life (which does not help me seem cool and mysterious in public 🙄) The reason I bring this up is because I think when Italy’s tics get really overwhelming/he’s having a tic attack, Germany is the perfect candidate to apply deep pressure therapy. It’s probably one of the few times Germany initiates physical contact instead of Italy initiating it! He’ll hug Italy tight, tight enough to apply firm pressure and calm his nervous system down!

Germany is a workaholic, we all know this! So I headcanon that Italy takes care of him when he works himself too hard. Italy constantly checks in to make sure he’s drinking water, makes sure he’s eaten, and often tries to get him to take breaks! If he realizes Germany is not keen on taking breaks, Italy will suggest one under the guise of needing help. “Germany, I’m trying to reach something in the closet but I can’t get it. Can you come help me?” And once Germany is out of his office, he’ll try his best to keep him from working as long as he can! He can be pretty sneaky and mischievous as long as it’s for the greater good! Germany very well has caught onto these tricks, but his loyal need to help Italy no matter what usually overrides his need to work.

Germany is the big spoon and Italy is the little spoon! Germany is quite protective of his loved ones, and he feels best when he can provide them with safety. This results in him being the big spoon when he and Italy cuddle this way. He gets to hold Italy close and keep him out of harms way, all to himself. And then once the sensation of Italy’s body pressed against his kicks in, he (like always) gets very flustered. He’ll hide his face in the crook of Italy’s neck as he tries to calm down his racing heart. No matter how many times they get this close, Germany always gets flustered!

Italy was the first one (besides Prussia) to see Germany cry. Italy was very shocked when he first realized it was happening, but the shock had completely subsided once he realized how stressed and how scared Germany must’ve felt. He took him in his arms hurriedly, holding him gently to try and bring him comfort. Italy knew he could be pretty “useless” at the time, but if he could provide just an inkling of comfort to Germany then he did a job well done. To his surprise, Germany clung to him with so much force, Italy felt like he might’ve been crushed!

LAST ONE FOR NOW!!!! Italy often asks Germany to model for him for paintings! He loves painting Germany!! He is just so enamored by his beauty, he loves getting to make art of him, for him, etc etc! Italy has a little art studio where he does all of his paintings, and most of his paintings are of his partner! Germany is just very artistically inspiring!!!

[thegirlfromhawkins]

Hurt (Eddie x gn!reader)

I have been so busy lately but I actually got shit done today and even ate so I’m feeling pretty alright now. Here’s a little writing from my brain. My apologies for the amount of angst I’ve put out recently. This time of year is always a struggle for me and writing is one of my outlets. Anyways, thank you for reading, and send in requests if you’d like. :)

Trigger Warning: Mentions of abuse, Small amount of violence

This wasn’t the first time. The first time he hit you, called you names, and made you feel like complete shit.

It wasn’t the first time you showed up at the dimly lit trailer park in the dead of night looking for any bit of safety.

Now here you are once again waiting in front of Eddie's trailer trying to get the nerve to knock on the damn door. You know what will happen if you do though. It broke your heart to see Eddie so upset but there just wasn’t a way to get out of the relationship you were in now. But was there really anywhere else to go? When thinking about it, Eddie is the only person you feel safe and comfortable around in times like this. The thought of staying alone for the night was all you needed to get you to knock.

It took a couple of minutes but a sleepy Eddie opened up. Once he got the sleep out of his eyes he took in your disheveled appearance—hair a mess, bloodshot eyes, some bruises spread out on your body.

Without a word he lets you in the trailer where you go to sit on the couch. Eddie now paces the small living area while gathering his own thoughts. Your own thoughts are racing too—the events earlier that night, how many times you’ve ended up coming to Eddie for comfort.

“Y/N,” Eddie says bringing you out of your wandering mind.

“Yeah?” you reply unsure of what he’s going to tell you next. It could be one of his lectures again and you get it. You deserve it for going back to that jerk.

“When is this gonna stop?” he asks with pain in his voice,” Y/N I can’t keep seeing you hurt all because of this asshole. This has got to end.”

“Eddie, I know. I know I need to end it. I just can’t right now he’ll be upset and I don’t want him to hurt himself or do anything bad-”

“Bad? This is bad. What he’s doing to you is bad. Who gives a shit if he hurts himself? He’s hurting you!” Eddie interjects feeling his emotions explode.

Eddie’s your best friend in the whole world and he’d go to the end of the Earth to do anything for you. Seeing you like this constantly has really put a stop to your friendship and truly he rarely sees you unless it’s nights like these. Your boyfriend didn’t take a liking to Eddie and that was reciprocated back. In the beginning, Eddie didn’t think too much about who you were dating until excuses came up. Excuses for not hanging out, for the bruises on your skin, and even the black eye you showed up with one day.

Eddie can handle a lot of things but handling the anger for that bastard of a boyfriend? He can’t stand it anymore.

“Please calm down Eddie. I’m sorry,” you say tears now falling down your face.

He walks over to the couch and pulls a blanket around you before going to wipe your tears,” Darling you have nothing to be sorry for.”

You nod at his words trying to believe them.

“Will you tell me one thing?” he says calmly now kneeling on the floor in front of you,” Where is that asshole right now?”

You immediately knew where Eddie was going with this and the last thing you wanted was to see him hurt,” No Eddie that’s not a good idea.”

“He’s at that abandoned house everyone parties at right? It’s Saturday.”

He was right and could tell by the look of worry in your eyes. Grabbing his jacket and vest he quickly slid on his shoes. Your protesting did no good as his intent was already set on giving your boyfriend a piece of his mind. And fist.

“Please! Eddie I don’t want you hurt!”

“If he’s going to treat you like shit, I’m going to kick his ass.”

With those words, he’s off to the van with keys in hand. You race after him and jump in the passenger seat. The whole drive you plead with him to turn around and go back to his place. Every time he brushes off your attempts.

Pulling up to the house there is a party obviously going on by the number of cars and loud noises heard from outside. This time Eddie is begging you to stay in the van but like hell would you. Realizing he’s not going to be able to he reluctantly goes up to the house with you.

The door opens as some teenagers walk out laughing and clearly tipsy at least. Eddie makes his way through the people with you behind. He tells you to hold on to his jacket so he doesn’t lose you. After passing through a few rooms Eddie found what he was looking for and what you were dreading to see.

“Woah the freak is here!” your boyfriend yells obnoxiously making the group of guys he’s surrounded by laugh,” What the fuck could you possibly be doing here?”.

Eddie moves forward and lets you come into view of your boyfriend. By the look in his eyes when his drunk mind registers it’s you he is pissed.

“You better get away from them Munson. I don’t think you wanna know what’ll happen if you don’t” he laughs amused with himself again while you’re cringing at his remarks.

In a split second Eddie’s right in front of him with his fist colliding with that asshole's face. Eddie shakes off the punch from his hand as there are clear marks showing up from Eddies rings on your boyfriend's face.

“Never lay a fucking finger on Y/N again. Ever.” Eddie speaks and it’s the only time you’ve ever heard him talk in a threatening tone.

Your boyfriend is so drunk that he’s still coming to with what just happened. Eddie is quick to turn and grab your hand leading you back to the van.

Once your both settled in your seats Eddie lets out a long sigh,” I’m sorry Y/N. I really am. I just can’t stand to see you getting hurt.”

“Thank you.”

“What?”

“Thank you, Eddie. For standing up for me when I couldn’t,” you speak softly feeling tears coming on again.

“I should’ve done it sooner. I should’ve-”

“No Eddie. You did exactly what you were supposed to.”

Eddie leans over in his seat wrapping you in a hug and your tears start to fall onto his shoulder. It’s silent for a few moments and when Eddie leans back in his seat you can see the tears in his eyes.

“Please just promise me one thing. Never talk to him again. If he bothers you call me whenever, I don’t care I’ll be there.”

His words fill the van and it starts to hit you how bad your situation was. How Eddie must’ve been feeling this whole time is finally showing. His doe eyes filled with worry and sadness stare into yours. It’s almost hard to breathe with all the emotions flowing through you but Eddie's hand rubbing your shoulder draws you back to what he said.

“I promise.”

[cthulhu-calling]

Parenting : Finally Home

Natasha Romanoff x Reader

Summary : Natasha is finally able to recognize that feeling in her chest. The warmth in her chest, the buzzing happiness she feels that can overshadow the exhaustion of caring for a one year old. For once in her life, it feels like she actually belongs.

Warnings : fluff, angst, crying, soft natasha romanoff

Word Count : 648

Author's Note : This is a female!Reader x Natasha story. Reader has not specified body type or race. I hope you enjoy and please leave a comment. Criticism is appreciated! This is a flashback from when Rosie was a baby.

series masterlist

“Alright, alright, I think it’s time I put Rosie down for a nap, so tone it down will ya?” Natasha asks as she takes an overwhelmed Rosie from Pepper’s arms. 

“There’s a bottle in the fridge, love,” you tell her as she just gives you a thumbs up and takes Rosie upstairs to her nursery. The noise from downstairs dies down a little, everybody grabbing some lunch after Morgan mentioned how she was ‘dying of starvation’ and asked for someone to call CPS. 

The one year old already seemed less irritated now, far away from all the noise and constantly being cuddled and passed around in everybody’s arms. She settled with her head against Natasha’s chest, her tiny fingers wrapped around the fabric of her t-shirt. Natasha closed the nursery door behind her, settling in on the rocking chair, slowly rocking back and forth as Rosie drifts off to sleep. You would generally fall asleep with Rosie on this chair but honestly, you could fall asleep anywhere. Natasha, on the other hand, was hyper aware. The feeling of her sleeping baby on her chest was something she had grown to love. It felt odd to care for something. After years of killing and destroying, to take care of something was entirely new. A new heat blossomed in her chest, tears inevitable now. This feeling in her chest was new but not unwelcome. She recognised it now, could put a name to it. The feeling of home. 

She put baby Rosie in her crib and walked downstairs to find that almost everyone had left and you were tidying up the place of the stray paper cups and pizza boxes. 

“Pepper and Morgan are in the guest room, they’re staying the night before they drive back tomorrow morn— baby, what’s wrong?” You drop the half filled cup of wine on the floor when you see her tear stained cheeks, rushing to take her in your arms, knowing she liked having some form of physical touch, something to ground her. She allows you to pull her close, sighing loudly. You keep quiet, ready to listen whenever she decides to tell you what’s wrong. After a couple moments of silence, wrapped in each other’s arms, she finally tells you what’s been on her mind. 

“You know, before you, I didn’t have a home,” she can see the question in your eyes, wanting to point out the Avengers, Clint and Laura but she shakes her head. “I had a family, sure. But this, you and Rosie are my home, my everything. Growing up, I never had anything to myself, the Red Room didn’t permit it. And then, I was allowed to have things and I did, but they were never truly mine,” her voice wavers as tears threaten to spill again and you pull her closer, holding her impossibly tight. 

“But you, you and Rosie are what’s truly mine and honestly, I couldn’t have asked for anything better, you’re both more than I deserve,” you’re both crying now as you hush her, gently rubbing your hand up and down her back, in the same motions the two of you often did to calm Rosie down. 

“Hush, don’t say that. You deserve me and Rosie, and honestly, I couldn’t ask for anyone better to do this with. I love you and nothing will ever change that,” the conviction in your voice convincing her all the more. 

“Well, good thing we decided not to get carpets until Rosie moves out for college, that wine stain would’ve been a bitch,” she tries to lighten the mood which earns a laugh from you, followed by a sniffle. 

“Can I kiss you?” Natasha wonders out loud and lightly brushed her lips against yours in a sweet kiss which you almost immediately deepen. With your body so close to her that you’re almost one, Natasha knows, she’s finally home. 

[virtual-insanity28]

Hey! I was just wondering if I could get some headcanons for Gagamaru x anxious/depressed reader?? Like how would he Comfort them etc.

Have a lovely day ❤️

(if you're not comfortable doing it, feel free to ignore!!)

Gagamaru x Anxious/Depressed!Reader Head canons

Requests| OPEN and gladly taken &lt;3

A/N| omg i feel this sm- my anxiety has gotten better due to some of the things Gagamaru does for you in these headcanons, so it’s a bit of a personal hit which i loveeee~! have a lovely day as well anon~!

Gagamaru, as we know, is a very calm and nature-oriented boy. He doesn’t fail to show that either. Whether it be showing you a new hiking trail or just chatting about the boar he recently hunted, he loves to talk to you about his adventures.

He gets lonely and you can feel it. Although it is relaxing to meditate at a mountain’s peak alone, he has an empty hole that only gets bigger and bigger…until you.

You were…a handful in your own way.

To even catch your attention was hard. It was as if you were fixated on your daydreams each and every time the tall mountain man tried to approach you.

It wasn’t until a friend of his pointed out the sweat and nervous stutters you made that Gagamaru knew you were overly anxious.

“But…why?” He tilted his head to the side like a dog hearing an odd noise. Never had he been great at understanding people’s emotions. He had been an outcast in his school for that, yet he never minded it. Just more free time to himself.

Meanwhile, you were an outcast because you wanted to be one. People avoided you due to your excessive negativity. It wasn’t something you were proud of, but you didn’t have the motivation to try and stop it anymore…

One day, out of the blue, Gagamaru grabs some trail gear and offers you a pair of boots. “Come with me on a hike,” he simply requests. His voice was monotone and deep, but he made effort in keeping his mind knowledgeable. If you had anxiety AND depression, then he would be there to help. Besides, it gave him a chance to get better with his own lack of empathy.

He wasn’t aggressive nor was he extremely affectionate. He was at limbo. Similar to yourself. He, though, wasn’t negative. He just went with the flow.

Your bland comments about wanting to disappear and such were constantly avoided with a simple hum. The further you went up the hill, the more your anxiety rose.

Were you annoying him? Did you perhaps go to far in saying things you didn’t mean? What if he hated you? Was he going to ditch you somewhere and not bother to come back for you? Were you…a bad person?

All of your racing thoughts were instantly stopped once a large hand placed itself on your shoulder. Gagamaru gave you an expression of…solitude, as if he knew you were overthinking and wanted to help quiet you down.

Gazing from his tough, scarred hand, your eyes shifted to what rested in front of you. Beyond the edge of the cliff, a beautifully cinematic scene of nature displayed itself before you. The high noon sun was bright but not blinding. It gave the trees an enchanting shade of the season, and the nearby rivers flowed through the land.

”Let’s meditate.” Gagamaru found a clear patch of grass and seated himself atop it, patting the spot next to him for you to come.

”I-I…I couldn’t-”

”Yes you can. It’s not hard, (Y/n). Come here.” Complying to his soft demand, you sit besides the goalkeeper with a sigh. “Take deep, full breaths, now. It’ll calm you and keep your mind empty. Trust me.”

Trust. That was the word. Trust was what brought you and Gagamaru together in the first place. He trusted you in allowing him to understand people, and you trusted him to teach you how to block the dark things out.

Each time you feel cooped up with emotions, don’t be afraid to voice them out to Gagamaru. Even if he doesn’t give the best answers, mostly just hums and nods, he genuinely is curious how you feel and wants to figure out better ways how to help.

He let’s you tag along on his hikes and meditative sessions, giving you a few visualizations with his low, soothing voice, and, once you’re comfortable enough, will let you have secret access to watching his practices for soccer at the bench. Whether it be for Blue Lock or just to catch up, Gagamaru claims that simply watching soccer can calm(or energize) the soul enough to forget the past doubts holding them back. Is he wrong? Obviously not.

In other words, as little as Gagamaru may seem in being a caretaker for people, he does try his best to help you cope. It’s the simple things that matter to him.

(bonus, he even tries and cooks homemade meals for you to comfy you despite his lack of experience in an actual kitchen)

[nights-nonsensical-ramblings]

What if the boom team got trapped in the movie universe?

ah very interesting 

 I’m gonna say for this that the boom crew haven’t met the Scu characters yet.

Like maybe Eggman did a thing during a battle and accidentally brought him, Orbot and Cubot and Team sonic to the movie universe.

At first they find it so weird because; there’s only humans

Ooh and early on there’s a massive Sticks freak out because someone in green hills sees them and they’re only slightly fazed and go up to them saying something like “oh are you more of Sonic’s alien friends?” And now Sticks is convinced Scu Sonic is conspiring with aliens.

But her reaction when she learns that Scu Sonic actively refers to himself as an alien is priceless.

G.U.N are loosing their minds. It was bad enough when one super powered alien child appeared then two more and a bunch of mystical reality warping jewels  appeared. and now theres alternate dimensions getting involved too.

Tom and Maddie just taking everything in stride like: yep this is our life now

The dynamic I’m picturing the boom crew having with the scu crew is: the cool cousins that stay over now and again.

 But as for more specific dynamic ideas

Orbot and cubot I need Orbot and Cubot to meet unit the drone. These three funky litttle robot dudes are great. It’s not uncommon to see the three bots following after Maddie or Tom like little ducklings. The scu boys love Orbot and cubot and think they’re so funny and sweet and Orbot and cubot are so happy because everyone’s being nice to them. They tried to speak to Crazy Carl at some point, the poor bots got terrified out of their minds.

Eggman Every now and again Eggman will try and do something villainous but utterly fail or have it be hilariously petty. I don’t know why but I can see him liking Tom and wanting to be his friend and Tom being in a constant state of ??? Around him. And I can see him hanging around wade for some reason.

Boom Knuckles Remember the boom episode where knuckles tries to find a family? (Knuck, knuck who’s there?) well he’s loving spending time with the family. And he admires Maddie a lot so he’s constantly trying to make her proud and impress her and then Scu knuckles keeps trying to one up him because he “must make mother proud” Another thing i’m thinking about Boom Knuckles and Wade interacting. The level of dumbass would be incomprehensible to those around them. But even if no one knows what they’re on about the two of them are getting along great

Boom tails: he is so shocked to learn the scu boys share a room and don’t go nuts in each other’s presence. Scu tails gets his help to try to teach wade basic mechanics. It does not work and now all three are banned from using power tools (wades is permanet the tails’ is not) 

Boom sonic: he’s going Stir crazy, hes not having any battles and this calm suburban day to day is driving him nuts. He’s challenged Scu sonic to many, many races. Scu Knuckles offered to spar with him but after Scu Knuckles under estimated boom sonics strength and hit him all the way across the yard he decided he will not be doing that again. He once found Scu tails building something and when he asked what it was the answer he got (definitely not strong enough to destroy a tank) made him live in fear of the tiny fox.

Amy: my first thought was her and Maddie calmly sipping tea while utter chaos happens around them. Aww but her and jojo the two of them would be so sweet together, Amy creating a make shift fuzzy puppy set and teaching her how to play, jojo Colouring with her and Amy taking in every word. Just the two of them being adorable. All this makes Rachel love Amy and the two of them also get on great, the two of them area force to be reckoned with when mad. Ooh I just remembered Amy adopted bea the bee bot, she’ll definitely approve of unit.

Sticks: she and Crazy Carl end up uncovering so many secrets together. If Rachel’s side of the family is over she has to be restrained so she doesn’t remove Randall’s head.

Ok but one absolute necessity is a baseball game. After all it’s no the scu with out baseball.

It’s boom team vs wachowskis 

Amy uses her hammer.

Boom Knuckles sees Scu knuckles punch the ball and copies him.

There where many lost balls and broken bats that day.

Orbot and cubot try their best

Someone gets hit in the face by an extreme speed ball

The scu provide commentary (aka narration) for the game

Actually wait, unit can’t really play so he ends up commentating most of the game by via poetry 

There’s like a 20 minute stretch where he’s only speaking in haiku.

[icedmetaltea]

x

I feel pretty close to doing it ngl. Today was... horrible. Is. It's only 2pm now. Who knows what else could happen between now and tomorrow.

I've been so on edge, unable to calm myself down. On the verge of a panic attack constantly, then having a small one for like 30+ mins... I got my mom to come up here and spend some time w/ me but she was obviously distracted. We ended up talking while I drew, weighing options.

I need the fluid from my ears gone so my anxiety can finally begin to calm down. I can't go anywhere in the car though without having horrifically bad panic attacks, so I'm terrified of driving anywhere, and seeing how the nearest clinic is 30 mins?? Fuck that.

Wondering where I'm going to spend the winter... or even the next month. I should probably be in a mental institution till they can figure out what tf is wrong with me and get me on the appropriate meds. The therapist yesterday said there's a possibility I have bipolar disorder, and that would explain why I feel so unbearably unstable if so. Again, though, the nearest would be at least a 40+ min drive. Wouldn't fix the ear issue.

I can't stay here in this camper bc it's not an all-season one. It's getting cold out, nearing October and I've barely able to comprehend it.

I can't stay in Virginia cause if I stayed with my sib again, well, they're planning to move to New York soon and they're taking the kittens with them ofc. And they seem much happier without me there. If I stay with my sister, she's busy with a job and 2 kids. I can't have one of my screaming panic attacks in front of them.

So yeah. I feel trapped. In my own head from the muffled hearing, in life since idk where I'm going to be in the next month or two, also just knowing nobody wants me around. I know my mom would be so much happier if I wasn't there, free to be with her husband and go about their daily lives without dealing with a load of baggage like me.

She snapped at me when I mentioned suicide and while I can understand why, it still hurt. She said she had a migraine and needed to leave so I'm alone again. Alone with crippling anxiety and racing thoughts. Alone without a solid ground to stand on. Alone without knowing where I'll end up in a month, knowing I'm unwanted to my whole family even if they reassure me, alone in knowing that if I do end up staying in an institution I'll have basically nothing to do but be completely alone with my thoughts around strangers who are possibly loud and/or aggressive. Alone. Just alone.

And yea, suicide is looking like more and more of a good plan. If I go through with it, I should do it here while I'm surrounded by all these guns. On the other hand, I'd have to go out in the woods where my mom wouldn't find me, at least not till I'm unrecognizable. On the other hand I keep telling myself this is temporary and eventually my hearing will come back, eventually I'll live somewhere where I'm wanted and don't have to worry about suddenly having the rug pulled from under my feet, but come on. I've been telling myself that since my friend left. It's been 3 months and it's only gotten worse. I'm worse off than ever. I need help and idk how to get it here. I'm in counselling, I have a doctor who can give me meds, but it's still somehow not enough. My mind keeps screaming out, demanding my attention, trying to protect me from what, suffocation? I know it's irrational but it's been plaguing my thoughts. And idk if therapy can help. Not in time, at least.

So yeah, I just keep telling myself things will get better, but I'm beginning to think that I'm just a horrible liar.

On something more positive I guess, I called the crisis line my therapist recommended and for once someone was there to talk me through a panic attack. The last time I called while I was in VA, they basically just said idk go to ER I guess?? But no the lady sat with me for like 20+ mins. I was still on the verge of a panic attack (and tbh still am) but idk it was nice. I've always heard panic attacks aren't "serious enough" for crisis lines but she said I could call anytime.

Cause like... the panic attacks I've been having aren't normal. They aren't the kind I'd be able to manage back in the day. They're all-consuming, they make me feel like I'm choking/going insane/passing out all at once, they make me scratch myself till I bleed, they make me scream. Maybe that is just bc my hearing is still muffled (and again idk how tf to deal with that) but yeah....

Having the weight of that looming over me with no end in sight also makes the idea of suicide look very pretty and convenient. It'd hurt, but just for a moment, not like these horrible long nights with racing thoughts, broken sleep full of nightmares, the choking feeling in my throat constant and unforgiving.

What do I still have to live for? Like 5 things idk. 1. guilt bc I'd feel bad about mom finding me since she's so sensitive. 2. OFMD s2, 3. Drawing??, 4. Finishing fics??? Idk., 5. I genuinely cannot find a 5th one and that scares me.

Zen, if you're still alive, congrats. You've done it. Your absence completely and utterly ruined my life. I will never be the same again.

My body is actively trying to kill me. I just wish it'd do it sooner, in one fell swoop, fucking give me a heart attack or something. I'm tired of the constant anxiety, the creeping depression, losing all interest and passion and the little things that make me...

yeah. I think I will. I just don't know what way I will. Or when. If life is worth living, then it better give me a fucking miracle real fucking soon. I can't take this anymore. I really can't. I want to get out, I want to get out, I want to get out. I'm tired, I'm aching, I'm scared, I'm guilty, I'm useless. I need help but there's none. Next therapy appointment isn't till monday and wtf are they going to do?? I need to be in an institution and the nearest one is so far away. I'm trapped. I need help. I need help. I need help. I need help. I need help. I need help.

But at the same time I don't want help. I've been asking for it so much, using people, and for what? I'm still going to go through with it. What's it matter?

Why help someone who's more or less already sealed their fate? Besides, it's not like I'll miss much. The world is getting worse and worse. Rights being taken away left and right. Why bother living?

[addcests]

a family is you, and you, and :: ch5 - ao3 mirror

pairing the addcest is there if you believe

words 5475

rating [T]

summary "Hey, Dominator, where's Psyker?" It's an innocent question, at first. And then it rings, rings, rings through Dominator's mind constantly, like an incessant nagging that he doesn't want to quite acknowledge presently. Not yet. So he doesn't. "He's out." It's not a complete lie, anyway. --- If you'd ask each Add what family meant, they'd have similarly different answers. A contradiction in and of itself—a testament to the very conception of their existence. Yet, there lies one thing wholly similar; a conviction all three share: they'd fight for their family. And now they must.

note woo boy that sure was a ride when i said things wouldn't happen ig i kind of lied sorry! LMAO but! at least i made up for this chapter with this whoping 5.4k words! anyway, the first scene was really fun to write... ! <3 i love giving dom hope also can't wait to snatch it from him! <333 and trouble in paradise... if it's not one thing with these adds it's another smh :/ but! all will be well! eventually, maybe, hopefully! thanks for reading <3

There were two truths when it came to the Diabolic Esper.

One: he does not sleep.

When the power of time control dangles along your fingertips, one sort of abates the need for sleep.

“Slipped my mind,” he'll too cheerfully, too dismissively answer Psyker or Mastermind as he slithers past their disapproving and worried looks.

It is pretty commonplace, after all, around the Add household to forego sleep in pursuit of one’s goals.

And yet, like the very laws of time he defies, Esper, who does not sleep, slept. Very deeply, at that.

—the other, second truth: Esper did not dream, because while others were blessed with lulling dreams, he was cursed to have nightmares in return. Perhaps it is the nature of his psyche, twisted and tormented as it was, or it is a side effect of something as unnatural as time traveling all these years, or maybe it is the few pockets of sleep he manages to nestle in once every blue moon. Maybe it is all of it or maybe it is none of those reasons at all.

And yet, regardless of the reasons, if any, Esper, who does not dream, dreams. 

Reasons aside, all Esper knows is that once he opens his eyes he can see that he is currently standing in a vast field, surrounded by an explosion of breathtaking anemones. 

Mother's flower.

It was such a gorgeous landscape. No matter which direction he chooses, there is nothing but a stretch of anemones, pure and white.

A beautiful innocence flooded with white and as gorgeous as far as the eye could see.

Esper bends at the knee, reaching to pluck a handful into his grasp. He holds them tenderly, with loving care and is immediately overwhelmed by its scent: a deep earth-like woodsy smell, tinged with a hint of something citrus-like. Inhaling and closing his eyes, even in this dream, he could never forget the times he would enter Mother's study and catch a hint of these flowers lingering on her clothes, or on her hair, or on her hands. From holding the flowers alone, the scent became stronger, almost overpowering all his other senses.

For Esper, it is a comfort and core memory, he feels as if he could just close his eyes…

Indeed, his eyes grow heavy, and soon, he drops to both knees, barely keeping upright. And yet, despite this sudden sap of strength, the flowers were a calming lull…

“Mother…”

A shard reflecting Grace drifts into view.

He begins to sag further still, placing a palm on the ground to keep himself upright, trembling and again struggling to breathe… 

He didn't have time to waste here… ! He couldn't afford to sleep. He had to go. He had to go now. He had to get to mother now, right now! Nownownow—

More white shards appeared, all with Grace.

His heartbeat accelerates as his thoughts begin to race and race as he continues to struggle, and continues to panic, the shards of Grace swirling erratically around him now. No longer could he focus on the flowers that seemed like an anchor at first, keeping him afloat. What he once thought was his anchor grounding him, it was now dragging him down and he was sinking, sinking…

—and then it all happened so fast.

Everything that occurs next is within mere seconds, yet for one who bends time, all of it at once felt so ironically slow. Amidst the storm of his racing thoughts, a sharp cut of white noise sliced a line through his whirlwind of dread. There was nothing left but an eerie, silent emptiness in his mind for but a nano second, leaving him with no choice but to suddenly hyperfocus on his other senses and surroundings and arrive at the conclusion that he was not alone. 

He was being watched all this time. 

Though he demands his wretched body to move, he falls limp in place instead; and then, he could hear everything. He was quite keenly aware of the familiar sound of cracking, as if something was bending and breaking.

One final, ear shattering crack—then, from a near distance there was an explosive color of pulsing purple and pink hues, followed by the very space he was occupying fissuring until it cracked, cracked and shattered into fragments, exploding once more. The impact and blasts were so forceful, knocking him back so hard that his ears began to ring, rendering him all but dizzy.

When the ringing finally stops, Esper groans and tries to sit up and finds that he can't; a weight is crushing his chest, preventing him from doing so. Disoriented, he can do little other than fight to force his eyes open, realizing that he's also paralyzed beyond just being held down.

Due to this realization—the comforting aura into terrifying dread—he also confirms he was attacked with—

“—Paranoia,” drawls a mellow, flat voice, “and so, you're still alive…”

As someone well traveled, he's not surprised at all when he finally gathers his bearings and he is met with a face that’s his. But what does surprise him is that it's not a face of his that he recognizes. In that sense, he knows Psyker and Mastermind's face. There are also Psych and Arc's faces, when they were younger. But something already eliminated the fact that it could be either of them: the one, lone black sclera. And this face was much younger, nestled in a distinct cat hoodie, deep and dark purples and not the lightly tinged-purple white he was familiar with during his times as Time Tracer.  But something even beyond his attire was quite… different; off, even. “You're not Time, and yet… what an interesting form.”

“And you're here,” he replies back, uninterested.

Esper hacks and coughs, cursing the lingering effects of Paranoia that leave him immobilized still and the foot pressing firm on his chest, pinning him in place.  Unable to do much of anything else, a certain gleam catches his eye, from a shard orbiting near this person with his face. The shard is a pearlescent color, pure and white, much like the anemones he's currently crushing. It turns and catches the light, reflecting Grace's face once again.

So, this was this… Add's doing, he'd lulled and trapped him here, but how? 

Finally, the offender lifts his foot from Esper’s chest and turns his back carelessly on him, arms outstretched, “This form, this is what you—what we always wanted, wasn't it, Esper?” He tilts his head back, glancing over his shoulder, “For Mother?” 

A bright purple begins to shine underneath the other male.

These are their last words as Esper opens up and extends the space directly underneath them, binding him in place as he teleports a safe distance away immediately at the end of Void Field's cast, clenching at and massaging his chest. He takes the moment to steady and stabilize his breath once more.

This Add does little more than flinch under the restraints of the energy of space and then he laughs.

And laughs again, a horrid and annoyingly subdued little thing that only pisses him off.

“So meaningless…”

Esper stands defensive, watching as this shorter Add approaches him, step by unenthused step, long coat tails fluttering behind him in the void. His hand aches, closes and opens, then closes into a fist again as he feels his dynamo nearby. “Speak your purpose or else.”

“I am, yet you won't listen.”

Before Esper could probe himself anymore, he reacts with just enough speed to catch one of those ever-floating shards that his other self just flung at full force towards his face. The shard reflects Mother's serene expression, hand tucking back a strand of hair, frozen in time. Recognizing this, his hold on the shard turns tight-fisted, to the point that he is able to feel the glass dig past the protective barrier of his gloves. Esper is sure if he holds it any tighter, he’d draw blood. He probably does. His grip still tight, he throws a glare to his other self, silently demanding an explanation.

“That's what you wanted, right? Mother?” Again, he prods with the same question, voice indistinct, bearing no emotion that Esper could pick at. “But, ah, that's right, you can't have her.” Making himself comfortable, he kicks back on one of his Dynamo (one that Esper does not recognize), sitting with one leg dangling in the air. Leisurely, he gestures to one of his other fragmented shards as if they had all the time in the world. Droopy eyes regard him for a moment, like he's studying him, trying to figure which piece in the puzzle he'll unlock next, and then he resumes. “Then, maybe this one instead. You'll surely want this more?”

Esper, however, is too distracted to even begin to break down that hard calculating gaze. Again, another shard is sent his way, though it's nudged less aggressively towards Esper this time. When he catches this one, his eyes widen at the reflection as the name tumbles from his lips without his permission, “D-Dominator… ?” As if guilty, for some inexplicable reason, Esper's shocked gaze turns towards this other Add.

In this entire encounter thus far, not a single emotion ran across his other self's face. Until now. It was barely there, but Esper parses the flicker of this Add's lips tugged ever so slightly down as contempt.

“What do you want with Dominator—”

“I'm asking the questions here.” Barely there electricity sparked in agitation from his left eye as he stands once more, striding leisurely towards Esper. He paces until he's directly in front of Esper, about a foot apart and then looks down at Esper’s hands, holding both shards. “Your hands are full.”

Holding both Mother's and Dominator's shards indeed, he looks down to them too and then to him once more. “And?”

Again, this other him laughs. “‘And!’ he says…..” Though lacking its usual manic energy, that was definitely his laugh. This time, he laughs so hard, he throws his head back, hand covering his face, shoulders trembling and shaking his small form. “Of course, I was always so greedy.” Using both hands, he gestures for one shard nearby. This one is bigger. Slowly, it floats into both his hands and he spins it around to face Esper, not quite handing it over to him just yet.

This shard, unlike the other still image ones, is animated: it shows Mastermind brushing Esper's hair tenderly as he sleeps and Psyker, right by his side, hand on Mastermind's shoulder as he watches him sleep also. 

As if subconsciously, he immediately moves towards it, expecting to take hold of it like he did the others. But he hardly even makes the complete gesture to reach out for it until it's snatched abruptly and precisely from his space. 

“I said your hands are full.”

Eyes wide now, Esper still makes to grab for them both when this other Add floats back and away just as easily on his dynamo. No longer willing to entertain whatever his double wants, he then demands, “Give them to me.”

“Choose.”

Panic pricks at his skin, desperate to have them both back. He yells, “They're mine—!”

Ah, and that was clearly the wrong thing to say—this Add—this person wearing his face, chuckles low and short, clipped. And then he charges faster than he could blink. Panic sets in again for another reason: imminent danger. Esper realizes he has so little time to react. He makes to move, to dodge, to teleport back, but within the supposed safety of the time-rip of his portal, this Add is easily here as well. For the split second Esper has time to think, this answers all of his questions about this encounter. This other Add then quite literally rips him from his own portal, sending him flying, anemones disturbed from their roots, kicking up in the air around him. The two shards, Mother and Dominator, fall from his hands in this scuffle too. When he blinks open his eyes again, he finds himself straining them close and struggling to keep lidded eyes open as he feels a familiar pair of hands wrapped at his throat, pressing hard.

“If they're yours,” an equally familiar voice rasps, much unlike the voice from the smaller one; this one is full of energy, life, determination—crazed and obsessed, snarls back at him, “then give me back what's mine.”

This Add stops pressing long enough for Esper to gasp in a greedy breath of air and out of surprise at the sight before him, “You—from that dream… ! You’re not that child anymore. Who—”

Long, almost tendril like flowing hair (that he had mistaken for Mastermind at that time in the dream), two pair of matching dark depths staring down at him, a form that seems to struggle to manifest yet stubbornly decides to anyway—paradoxical in nature—a shape that towers over him (obviously no longer that child form), especially at this height advantage, and those shards that float by his side have turned from their sincere soft, innocent white but to his usual, signature demented, dark deep pinks.

“You may address me as Paradox,” he grins down at Esper, deranged, flashing him a smile full of threatening teeth. “And you, Esper,”  he coos, and then taunts harshly, barking his words at him, “what did you expect?!” A deranged little laugh, colored with disbelief and admonishment escapes past his lips. “Did you expect me to coddle you? After all this time, you still can't pick right and yet,” he narrows his eyes as his grip around Esper’s throat tightens with each following enunciation, “you. Demand. So. Much!” A pair of black sclera narrows dangerously now, all prior amusement fleeing from his face as he glares deep and heavy and full of scorn. He’s so close, his breath tickles his younger self. It’s but a breath’s whisper, yet it is so loud with its dangerous undertone made plain, “I don't coddle failures. So, choose.” 

Esper, without much choice, chooses to choke and gasp around the fingers pressing insistently to his throat. 

“You want Mother, yet here you are in the future, fiddling where you don't belong. And what of your present? What of them? Are they not precious to you? Will you leave them behind?”

It was one thing to be lectured by someone wearing his face, it was another to have to die pathetically at his hands like this. With that in mind and his remaining energy, he finally manages to summon a couple of Dynamo to fly to his side and rush at Paradox, who was too absorbed in his ministrations and thus easily disengaged and knocked away. His other Dynamo flies to his side protectively; Esper, on one knee, wisely uses this time to regain air into his greedy lungs once more.

With Paradox thrown aside somewhere, and Esper no longer feeling on the verge of passing out from a lack of air, the shard with Mastermind and Psyker that Paradox dropped catches his gaze once more. He can barely make out their conversation, but it was faint. It sounds like they were talking about dinner. Well, Psyker was. But Mastermind was bargaining with him about dessert instead. That sounded so like them. In spite of being literally attacked by, whom he now has enough data and obvious logic to assume is, his future self and almost choked to death, Esper finds comfort in these two's consistent yet easy presence.

The shard that held their mother was inanimate till this point. That is, until he hears a voice coming from it.

”Edward, the present is precious for being the present.”

Still, he turns his gaze towards her, brows knitted with the pain of knowing that she was all alone in the end. He just wanted to save her—even if he knew better… ! He just wanted his mother…

The grief stabs at his heart and he clutches at his chest, as if to ease the pain of it all.

Likewise, the same from Dominator's shard. He, too, hears his voice.

”You know, you shouldn't even be here.”

He holds his hand out for Dominator, deep down wishing Dominator hadn't said that to him back then so many visits ago. He didn't want to leave Dominator alone either! He was in pain and lonely, and Esper was drawn to him… how could he leave him alone?

The grief of his actions and inactions pile on, as well as his failures, and he falls to his knees of his own volition, hands to his ears as if that would make everything just. 

Stop.

”Do ya think… Esper would mind a chocolate and vanilla cake this time ‘round?”

”He'll love anything if it's made by you, Psyk.”

Paradox, retaining his true form, stands towering over Esper’s slouched stance, glaring as Esper grips at his hair in a crazed frustration. “This should not be hard. No matter what you want, there's only one answer. Anything else is meaningless! That is the most basic of basics. That is the goal.” He then says with as much disgust as he can muster, “That was our goal. Now, choose or I will make you choose.”

Time ticks slowly in this unnatural black backdrop, filled with the most beautiful flowers.

It goes unnoticed by Esper, burdened with his choices.

Paradox, seeing this, knows his next decision before Esper can even think.

As promised and much like before, Esper is not left with a choice really, as he finds the shard containing Mastermind and Psyker at his throat by Paradox's hands. Later, he will remember how he felt the shard dig at his throat, no mark left but a ghost of pain irritating the scar at his neck. 

A whirl of anemone encircles them in a violent gust, accompanied by the same woodsy scent drowning out all and overwhelming all his senses as his eyelids, heavy, fall shut for the last time.

He hears one last warning:

“You should have never left them.”

And then—nothing.

===== → loading … loading … loading … :\\ destination … standby … … … =====

“... wha, Esper!? Quick, Mastermind… he’s awake!”

“... it’s been three days! How is he���is he… ?” 

===== → loading … loading … loading … :// destination … unknown … … … =====

“I wonder,” Dominator murmurs to himself, toying with Esper's miniature dynamo replica as it sits safely on its designated desk, “how he fares…”

If Dominator is being honest with himself (and these days that is not often), he finds that his mind drifts to Esper lately. After all, it's been a month, maybe two? Who was he to keep track of time? Though he always knew he was prone to night terrors and the such, that expression Esper left with that day struck Dominator hard and would remain seared in his memories for days if not weeks. 

A ding draws him from his fleeting fanciful thoughts and he blinks slowly. “Ah, Dynamo? Apocalypse?” He lifts his chin from his palm and turns his gaze upon the floating windows nearby, “Are we stable this time?”

A month or two, give or take, led to much success on his end, a lot of progress, and then frustration. His main goal was to see how far he could influence the reach of some of his Installs, particularly with the help of Force Field. There were promising results and so far, he's been able to maintain a much larger radius but at the cost of efficiency. As of the last experiment, the radius envelops the entire Add household, which has been his biggest success yet.

He walks over to the biggest display, some sort of feed showing the fluctuations of the Force Field. Casting such a wide reach strained Dominator but at least so far, from what Apocalypse was relaying, the potential was there to move into the next phase—

A sudden system warning blares through the lab, the shrill sound of it causing Dominator to flinch at the unsightly sound, a hand covering his ear. It then hits him what that warning was for exactly. Immediately, he whirls around to his Dynamo, then back to the screens as he asks, “Wait, the field!? It's being attacked?” 

No sooner than the words left his mouth, Dominator feels a far off rumble in the far left wing of the household. There was some seconds before there was nothing, and then an even louder bang. “Dynamo, what is that!?” Growling to himself, his fingers flies quickly along his keyboard to navigate through the various cameras they had set up, but even soon that was rendered useless—this thing, whatever it was, blew out all of them. Was it physical? Or some sort of arcane magic? “Apocalypse, quickly, I—”

The loudest, earth shattering boom Dominator had heard yet, rattled the entire household, strong enough to knock him to his feet, as well as other items in his lab. Signature purple waves of energy and electricity, seemingly from his projects, or his own Dynamo gone haywire, slither and explode in the room. Hissing rather from the shock of it all than any pain, Dominator, finally losing his composure, frantically yells out, “Can I please get confirmation on what is happening? It has been far too long without an answer for this to be acceptable!” He steadies himself to his feet, gripping the edge of a countertop for support. Again, he tries to summon Apocalypse, who he had lost in the frenzy of this commotion. And he finally appears but not as he expects, “Holographic form? Tsk, any injuries? Scan and report—” Are you alright? goes unsaid. “Where is your location?” Already, on pop-up windows, he can see Apocalypse’s vitals. Health was fine. Alongside that, Apocalypse had used some energy in preparation to retaliate the attack but there was no visible damage or signs of a scuffle. 

Apocalypse does not get to report anything more to Dominator, the connection drops, and instead the warning from earlier is flashing red now insistently on multiple windows, demanding his attention, overriding other screens. Was this a systematic or network attack? But, no… it was very much physical. Scans already showed signs this was not some random earthquake or natural occurring event, but a direct and deliberate attempt on the house—or perhaps, it was the Force Field?

Finally, he expands the warning screens and reads. The warnings were not just for the attack itself. In disbelief he mutters, “Impossible, it's completely… destroyed?”

Finally, some beats later, his cube partner flies into sight, fretting with meows over his creator. 

Dominator pays him little heed. He is fine after all! Dusting himself off, he hops right back into the fray of chaos and begins scrolling between windows, though soon he could no longer avoid his meows any longer when it becomes insistent and even louder. “Oh, for the love of Elrios, what is it now, Apocalypse? If you need to be looked at, I shall put you in queue and—” He stops, whatever words he had dies on his lips as he looks over his shoulder to see Apocalypse circling frantically over both Psyker and Esper's mini dynamo displays on the orderly countertop some paces away. Despite nearly everything else toppling over, the replicas remained unharmed. In fact, they looked even better than before from a mere cursory glance. “Is that…” He stops, frozen, as if afraid to approach when he is hit again with the realization that, “—P-Psyker…?” He falls unceremoniously to his knees, eyes wide in disbelief as he watches Psyker's replica whirl to life, static energy and electricity rippling in small waves along its device, no longer dim. 

Psyker's replica was online once more. 

“B-But… how can that be?” His voice, rough from commandeering and shout-outs, now soft, barely a whisper, tinged with fear, sadness, longing… but most of all, something he was afraid to feel: hope. 

Apocalypse requests the aid of two of Dominator's Dynamo to bring both replicas to the fallen Dominator.

Gently, he accepts them, staring at them as if a bare touch alone would shatter whatever miracle was happening here. He didn't need to do anything beyond observing them to tell they were online, but with both in each hand, he could feel the familiar signature of their energies, pulsing and radiating, and full of life… ! Looking at Esper's replica mini, his was much more vibrant than ever before too. Even more so than when Dominator scanned Esper and fed the replica his energy from the repairs a couple months ago. Could Esper finally be back… with Psyker?

As if sensing the possibilities whirling through his mind, Dynamo already ran calculations: “No portals via the Diabolic Esper have been recorded within the last… … …fifty three days, twelve hours, three minutes, and fourteen seconds and counting.” But what of the obvious energy blasts? The very ones that rattled the house to its core and dispersed here in the lab? Surely those were theirs… ! “Percentage of Diabolic Esper's energies: 64.21%. Percentage of Lunatic Psyker's energies: 75.89%.” 

“How can that be? Not even 90%? It is either Esper and Psyker or it is not!”

“... recalculating. … … Pending results … complete: entities are not Diabolic Esper and Lunatic Psyker.”

Frustrated, he fists a handful of hair, growling to himself. This made zero sense at all. Did his lousy automations and network receive interference of some kind from those psionic blasts? His eyes screw shut, heart racing as he forces himself to calm down, to focus, to relax. To prioritize. 

Exhale, start again. 

Focused, he opens his eyes, a light that was not there in ages, now brightening his gaze. “One thing at a time, Dynamo.” Magenta hues fall to the warning screens popping up as the system continues to crash, unable to read or feed data about his Force Field that is seemingly in disarray. “Let's… repair this, no, we shall fix it. Sturdy and stabilize it, we will need to increase energy and output now if we are having random attacks. No more risks from this. Then, we shall take stock of everything else, check for faulty devices and other miscellaneous damages, and then…” 

He opens his eyes again, a wary stare falling towards the replicas in his hand, whirling with energy and vibrancy unlike anything he's ever seen before.

“I suppose my mysterious benefactors that powered their replicas can wait, for now.”

===== → loading … loading … loading … :\\ destination … standby … … … =====

“Amazing, maybe you two should pair up more often on our excursions and dungeon dives after all. Who knows what you two could accomplish if you'd work together more.”

The two being one, Lunatic Psyker, vying for the chance of sport, having been restless for ages now because of two, Diabolic Esper finally rising from his coma like slumber, recovered as if nothing had happened.

Together the pair were testing out some custom made simulation-obstacle course that Mastermind blue printed and Psyker built. (Esper was working on some schematic of interactive rotations, or some such mechanism, but well… sleeping and traveling from home does put a quick halt to that progress.) Given that Mastermind refused to let Esper out of sight—i.e, house arrest, and that they all agreed to testing and observing Esper for the coming days—this was the next best choice for everyone.

“Hah, just admit you rather see the results than make the results yourself.”

“I've two perfect consenting subjects to do so for me, it is simply more efficient this way,” Mastermind shoots Psyker’s obvious bait down, dismissing him with a wave of his hand. He does have the nerve to smirk at him though, tacking on an afterthought, “Besides, admit you're enjoying yourself.”

“Well,” Psyker says in between sips of water, “Won't deny that. ‘s pretty exhilarating to have Esper’s portals boost my super sonic speed like that.”

“Of course,” Mastermind hums easily, attention split as he tinkers with a couple of nasod chips.

Psyker ungracefully plops himself beside the scientist, jostling him and his makeshift workstation. “And what's all this?”

“Psyker, stop moving! And where is Esper? So help me El if you tell me you lost him—”

Right on cue, a portal opens up, and at the same time, one of the nasod chips Mastermind holds lights up as soon as Esper hops from the portal, Mastermind makes to dodge him.

Well, he tries, anyway.

Esper lands perfectly in between the two, squishing his way demandingly into Mastermind's space as well. “Yes, what has you so occupied that you're ignoring vitals and our battle results?”

For a moment, Mastermind flushes brightly, ears red now that a pair of eyes are looking to him eagerly for answers. Nervously, he glances away, laughing mostly to himself to ease his nerves from the sudden attention. “Well, this? It's really nothing—”

“Doesn't look like nothing to us.” Esper tries to reach out for one of the nasod chips in Mastermind's hands.

“Yea, it lit up and everythin’ when Esper came over. Hmm, is it tracking his movements or somethin’?” Psyker inquires, grabbing Esper's mischievous, wandering hand, ignoring his whines and pouts.

Again, Mastermind does all he can to avoid their piercing gazes. Well, he supposes, if they don't find out now, they'll find out some other way, wouldn't they? Instead of explaining, Mastermind reaches across the inquisitive portal hopper, taking Psyker's hand into his hand.

Now it's Psyker's turn to blush. “W-Wha’! Hey!?”

“Oh, be quiet!” Mastermind barks back, fighting his own blush because of Psyker's blush. Calming down, he nods to Psyker's hand, “Make a fist, use some energy. You know, like I see you do sometimes without realizing it.” 

“Did ya hafta grab my hand just for that… !?”

Esper snickers.

Mastermind is so red, but mercifully, the other two say nothing else.

As instructed, Psyker looks down at his hand, makes a fist, opens it, makes a fist, until small crackles of electricity and energy circuit around his nasod glove. 

As soon as it does, the other nasod chip reacts to Psyker.

Before either can say anything, Mastermind digs into his jacket's pocket, and pulls out two perfectly replicated miniatures of Esper and Psyker's dynamo. “Each chip, linked specifically to you both, are suppose to go into this… and, well…” He trails off, because he doesn't want to really admit what this is for. 

Fortunately, they don't know why but unfortunately, they rather prod at its existence.

“Mastermind, this is such an elementary little toy.” Esper flops his weight on Mastermind's shoulder, teasing, “Is this really more important than me?” 

“What—No, o-of course not! It just—”

“Seriously, I feel like you made blueprints for somethin’ like this ages ago, when we were still just tracers,” Psyker adds on, his free hand gesturing at a short height as if indicating when they were that tall back then. “Why the interest in such a thing now?”

Even though he is clearly teasing, Mastermind inwardly flinches at Psyker's insight. He scoffs mentally, annoyed that the brawler was always analyzing him, always seeing right through him. Fortunately, or unfortunately, for him, Esper interrupts his inner thoughts by yanking him up from his seat, his project falling and Mastermind wailing to Psyker to catch it.

Thankfully, he does so.

“Well, if it's not more important than me,” Esper purrs, nuzzling at Mastermind who is desperately trying to avoid this suddenly affectionate time-manipulating cat’s snuggles, “come on, let's take a turn together.” Offhandedly, Esper comments loudly that he now understands why Psyker is always nagging Mastermind about staying in his lab and ignoring everything for his research. “No buts!”

Fondly, Psyker watches the two go off. Or, well, he watches Esper drag a whining Mastermind, pleading for the brawler to save him from Esper. He chuckles as they disappear off towards the start of the obstacle course. 

Then, his attention drops down to Mastermind's little project, blinking at the nasod chip linked to Esper lighting up. They must have started the obstacle course, then. He watches it for a few more seconds, and shakes his head. Idly, he wonders if Esper had did that on purpose, tugging Mastermind away like that. That devious schemer is always up to something. Though as his eyes fall to the nasod chips blinking, he supposes that Mastermind is always up to something nowadays too. 

He laments that Mastermind obviously can't trust him enough to open up.

When did their connection and trust become so terse and fragile?

Psyker, jumping from his thoughts, heaves a big sigh, and then puts on a smile, racing over to the section that they're at. “Oi! You two hurry up already!” He pumps his fist in the air. “Let's do a run with all of us together! It'll be fun! One who hits the least targets is on cleaning duty!”