#like i wanted to learn more about the world but after each quest it felt like the same thing was repeated

[perfectblve]

ok ff16 thoughts since i finally finished it 70 hours later

[jjungkookislife]

Tongue Like Candy Pt. 2 [Final]

ღ pairing: yoongi x f. reader

ღ genre: angst with a happy ending, brother's best friend au, smut [18+]

ღ summary: The last person you expect to see at your college graduation is the man who broke your heart three years ago. Despite the heartache you both went through, you can't stay away from each other. Will your brother be the obstacle in your relationship with Yoongi, or will it work out this time?

ღ wc: 15.8k

ღ warnings: pet names (princess, baby, babe), virgin!reader, age gap, sexual thoughts, corruption kink, self-deprecation, jealousy, masturbation, alcohol mention/use, food mention, mention of jimin x f. reader, hair pulling, marking (hickeys, biting, scratching), dry humping, shared shower, shirt used as a mouth gag, choking, fingering (f. receiving), oral sex (f. giving and receiving), protected sex, first time

ღ Date: March 9, 2024

ღ read part one here

~

And despite the ache in your heart that lingers and stings for the next three years, that’s exactly what happens.

It was just a one-time thing.

~

“Fucking finally!” you throw your cap in the air to the mix with everyone else’s not caring where yours landed before you push through the graduates to get a head start in leaving— ducking, and dodging professors on your quest to the door.

You had agreed to meet your family in the car, not wanting to spend an hour or more searching for them in the crowd of parents who are looking for their graduate as well. Nah, you had learned from high school.

“You should have tried out for track. I could barely keep up, princess.” You freeze, not wanting to turn around because you knew that voice anywhere and if you turned to face him, it would mean he was here for you and you’re not sure you could cope.

The last time you had seen him was well over three years ago. You had made it a point to avoid him at all costs, even turning down gatherings with your brother so you wouldn’t be bombarded by the events that had transpired on the night following your graduation party.

You couldn’t escape him, couldn’t run anywhere. With a deep breath, you turn around to face him for the first time, and it’s no shock when he takes your breath away.

“Yoongi.” his name rolls off your tongue easily, your heart hammering against your ribcage.

“Wow!” he exclaims, cheeks turning pink right after. “You’re even more beautiful than I remember.”

You wish you could respond, say thank you, say anything. You’re unable to, taken aback by his beauty. This man only gets more and more scrumptious with age, huh? The last time you’d seen him, his hair had been orange—a menace to society. Now, his hair was back to black and deliciously long; you couldn’t help but think he was hot as fuck with his natural hair color.

“Thank you,” you murmur, feeling overwhelmed. You look past him, seeing the doors open to let the parents out, and you know you’ll have a buffer in just a few minutes. 

“I hope it’s okay that I’m here. Your brother invited me, and I know we haven’t talked since…” Yoongi trails off, licking his lips. He runs his hand through his hair and you notice that he’s gotten much buffer since the last time you saw him, his suit jacket straining on his biceps. You remember what he’d felt like on top of you, cock rubbing against your wet cunt.

“Since you fucked my mouth,” you finish, instantly regretting it when his eyes widen and his jaw drops.

“Geez, princess. I wasn’t gonna be that crude about it,” Yoongi laughs, shaking his head. Good to know you hadn’t changed a bit since he stuffed his cock in your mouth, as you so politely reminded him.

“Yikes!” you grimace, smiling sheepishly after.

Yoongi laughs, throwing his head back. “You haven’t changed a bit, huh?”

“Not really,” you shrug. “Other than cutting my hair.”

“It’s cute,” Yoongi is quick to say.

“Thanks. And thanks for coming. You didn’t have to.”

“I wouldn’t have missed it for the world, princess. I’ve missed you,” he admits easily with a shrug, and your heart thumps extra heavily.

You’re unsure what demon possesses you, because you step forward, forgetting about all your conflicting feelings as you wrap your arms around his neck, lips pressed to his. It takes Yoongi by surprise, but his arms easily find their way around your waist, kissing you back just as eagerly.

Just like that, the chemistry between you sparks once again. Yoongi holds you tight in his embrace, lips moving in sync with yours as your fingers toy with his hair, just as soft as you remember. You want to drown in his essence, kiss him within an inch of his life as your body arouses feelings you haven’t experienced since that fateful day.

“I-” you start as you unwrap yourself from Yoongi, taking a step back to put some much-needed distance between you. 

“Hey, brat! Congrats!” Your brother cheers as he approaches you. He tugs you into a hug and you wonder if he witnessed your exchange with his best friend. 

“Hey! Thanks, I’m so happy to be done with school. I busted my ass to graduate a year early.” you smile as your parents join you. 

The five of you take pictures, soon joined by Jimin and Taehyung, who bring along their families. And like your high school graduation, there’s a party at your house tonight with all your friends and family invited. That includes Yoongi. 

Over the past three years, you’ve managed to avoid him completely, which was easy, considering your brother wasn’t in town too often. Plus, being a college student meant you spent a lot of your time on campus, so even if your brother was in for a (short) visit, you could use school as an excuse. 

Should you have talked to Yoongi? Sure. You probably could have found any of his socials if you tried, but it’s not like he was reaching out either. Your brother was more important than some romp in your room, of that you were sure. So why did it sting to know Yoongi wasn’t calling?

To make matters worse, the moment you step into your home, you’re left alone in the hallway with Yoongi. His gaze follows yours, staring at your bedroom door, his cheeks flushing as he looks away, only to lock eyes with you. 

So many thoughts run through Yoongi’s head, so many unspoken words he wishes he could have said, and yet, there’s nothing but silence. 

It’s in this silence that his thoughts stray, memories of that night seeping into the forefront of his mind.

The beating of his heart reverberates against his chest like a rhythmic drum, and the warmth that spreads through his veins is nearly too much, but the feel of your mouth on him easily combats that, yearning for more heat.

Your kisses are still a little awkward, but you mimic his movements easily, even brushing your tongue against his and taking a nip of his bottom lip. He notes the way you moan against him when he groans deep in his chest, arousal wetting your thighs. 

When you take his cock in your mouth, he says your name in a way that would embarrass him if he were with anyone else. He doesn’t think of himself as a Casanova, but every girl is a new experience, and when it’s with someone you have feelings for—whatever they may be—it’s out of this world. He doesn’t want his heart to get in the way of whatever this is because you’re batting your lashes and pouting when he doesn’t react right away to the languid movement of your hand on his length.

A pouty frown sits on your pretty lips, tongue peeking to lick at them as you wait for him to give you his undivided attention once again. You’re so pretty on your knees, drooling over his cock, the excitement of doing more evident on your face. 

By no means was this the best blowjob he's ever gotten, but what you lacked in skill you made up in enthusiasm. Besides, how could Yoongi ever compare you to anyone else when you were the only one who had his heart beating as rapidly as it was, new feelings arousing in him that he’d never felt before? You were incomparable.

“Make yourself at home,” your brother shouts from the top of the stairs, and you use that chance to run off to your bedroom, avoiding being in Yoongi’s presence for the time being. You know you won’t be able to avoid him for too long, but you just need a moment to catch your breath. 

Yoongi watches you run off, wincing when the bedroom door slams shut and he’s left alone. Sure, he’s been in your home since that night, but never with you still in it. There had always been some excuse when Yoongi came around, some paper, some midterm, some way to avoid him.

You were always in his thoughts, from the moment he woke until the moment he went to bed, sometimes with his hand wrapped around his hard cock, reminiscing about your lips. 

Day and night he tried to get his thoughts together, to piece every bit of himself into a picture, map out all his feelings, and decipher them before he made an even bigger mistake. 

Yoongi typed up what he wanted to say to you in his notes app, locked for his eyes only, but courage always failed him. Time and time again, he’d copy the words, all ingrained in his mind as he hovered over your Instagram, wishing he wasn’t such a sucker and could just send the damn message. Back and forth he went each day, thoughts growing darker and darker. 

You’re bothering her.

She doesn’t like you.

Leave her alone.

Despite those thoughts, Yoongi finds himself in front of your bedroom door, his fist raised to knock when the door opens, startling you and him.

“I-” he starts, looking at you as he licks his lips. Your gaze catches his lips, your hand reaching out for his shirt, tugging him into your bedroom before shutting the door after him.

“Yoongi,” you breathe his name, lips on his instantly as you push him onto your bed. Yoongi grips your waist, kissing you back as you settle over his lap.

This is wrong.

There’s so much left unsaid.

You need to leave.

His thoughts overwhelm him and he’s pulling away slowly, regretfully. He doesn’t miss the disappointed look that flashes across your face before you put your defenses back up. 

Yoongi watches you as you get off his lap and move across the room. You’re pacing back and forth, and he eyes you warily. Of course, he’d love to smother you in kisses and hold you in his arms. Take you to bed until his name is all you can say, but he can’t. 

“I’m sorry,” you apologize, and his eyes widen as he meets your gaze. “I shouldn’t have kissed you at graduation or now.”

“Princess,” he starts, but you cut him off. 

“I’m sure you have better things to do than be here with me. I won’t let this happen again. I'm sorry.”

“Princess, just let me talk to you. There’s nothing to apologize for unless you’re dating someone?” Yoongi’s words feel like a knife is in his throat as he says them, and he bites his lip as he awaits your answer. 

“No.” you shake your head. As if there could ever be anyone else when you’ve spent the last three years dreaming of seeing him again, of kissing him. 

Okay, there was that brief make-out session with Jimin that one time, but that was just for fun. Yoongi doesn’t have to know about that. 

“No?” Yoongi repeats, almost hopeful. He swallows thickly, running a hand through his hair, and he doesn’t miss the way your eyes follow the movement. He clenched his hands, veins prominent, and smirks when you nearly salivate over it. 

“Has there been anyone since?” It’s none of his business. He knows it’s none of his business, but fuck, he wants to know. He needs to know if anyone else has touched you like he did—if they’ve fallen for you as he had, and if they still think of you. 

“Yes,” you answer, and his world shakes. That’s not the answer he was expecting, but he knows it was bound to happen after all. 

“Oh,” his dejected sigh fills the space between you. 

“It didn’t mean anything. It’s stupid, so stupid,” you laugh as you grip your hair in your hands and squeeze. “But I haven’t been able to get you out of my head since and I thought kissing someone else would fix it but it didn’t. Nothing ever did, and it hurts, Yoongi. It hurts to know we couldn’t have been anything, and it hurts to know I was so easy to forget.” 

Yoongi stands. “Easy to forget?” 

You nod. 

“Easy to forget?” He repeats with a scoff. “If you’re so easy to forget, why have I been thinking about you every day since then? Why have I been hoping you’d call or message me, so I could see you again? You dodged every opportunity you could to see me and I thought that’s what you wanted, so I backed off. After all, I wasn’t trying to force my way into your life. But you are in no way easy to forget and if that’s what you think, then I haven’t done a good job of proving just how unforgettable you are, princess.”

You’re utterly stunned by his words. You blink, moving on autopilot as you grip him by the shirt, only hesitating for a split second before his hands grip your face. The heated stare he rewards you with leaves you breathless. The last time you’d seen him looking this intent, this serious, was that night in your bedroom and as those thoughts come to mind, you slam your lips on his.

Your lips are on his instantly, moving perfectly with his in a more practiced way than before. Yoongi bites back the jealousy he feels because you weren’t his and whoever taught you this was a figureless head in his mind. However, that does little to quell the jealousy that bubbles deep in his abdomen as his fingers grip your hair to hold you in place.

Yoongi allows you to lead after a beat, curious to see what else you’ve learned in his absence. His hands grab your hips, holding you to him as your tongue prods his lips apart when he makes no move to do so.

For a few moments, you allow yourself to forget all the pain and sorrow you went through. Kissing Yoongi feels just like the first time, but so much better. This time you’re not fumbling around, wondering if you’re doing it correctly or if it’s a massive failure. This time you kiss him with confidence, your fingers threading through his hair as you pull him close, teeth gently nipping on his bottom lip just to hear him groan, ending the kiss so he can press his forehead to yours. His gaze burns deep into your soul, and you wonder how you could have lived without this man for so long. Feelings you swear you buried away begin to rise to the surface, and as you keep your gaze locked on his, you realize just how fucked you are, because this time—this time—you know you won’t recover from the heartbreak again.

“Yoongi?!” You both step away from each other at the sound of your brother’s voice. Your heart is thundering in your chest and Yoongi echoes it. He runs a hand through his hair, looking in the mirror in your bedroom before he slowly opens your bedroom door. 

Your brother is at the top of the stairs, calling out to Yoongi again. 

“Coming!” Yoongi looks at you one last time, a frown on his lips. Would it always be like this?

“Go,” you mouth, and he nods. He hesitates, but Yoongi gets called again. 

He curses, “I’ll talk to you tonight, princess. Please wait up.”

You nod before urging him to go. Your brother’s footsteps are growing louder as he rounds the landing. 

“Dude, what took you so long?” Your brother asks, annoyed, as he finally looks up from his phone. “I need help getting the drinks in the cooler. Let’s go!”

“Sorry, I had to go to the bathroom.” Yoongi shrugs but follows your brother out of the house and to the car. 

You watch them go, shutting your bedroom door and leaning against it. Your lips still tingle from his kiss, and you hate yourself for feeling this way again. You had never really moved on from Yoongi or from that night. You had tried fooling yourself into believing you had, but seeing him again, kissing him, brought back all those feelings tenfold and you knew you were screwed. 

Fuck Min Yoongi.

“Babe! Why are you hiding in here?” Taehyung asks as he steps into your bedroom hours later. You’d hidden for most of the night, which was unusual, seeing as it was a party to celebrate you.

“You know this party is for you, right?” Jimin asks as he follows Tae and shuts the door after himself. 

“It’s for you guys too,” you answer weakly as you lay back on your bed. You miss the look of concern exchanged between both your friends as they climb onto the bed. Jimin on your left and Taehyung on your right. 

“Okay, spill it,” Jimin demands as he turns to his side, resting his elbow on the bed and his head in his palm

“Yeah, and don’t even think about lying,” Taehyung states firmly, knowing his bull shit meter will catch it. 

“Yoongi kissed me,” you admit softly. 

Jimin raises a brow. “At your last graduation? We know that.”

“Is the party bringing back memories?” Taehyung asks curiously. 

“No. I mean, he kissed me. Today,” you emphasize. 

“Wait.” Jimin hops off your bed. “That bastard’s here?” 

Taehyung gets off the bed as well, heading to your bedroom door before you scramble to stop them. 

“Stop! Don’t go out there.” 

“He kisses you and then leaves you again? I’m rocking his shit up! He can’t do that to you again! We won’t allow it!” Jimin is fuming. Taehyung nods in agreement. You had been broken up about that night and not seeing Yoongi after. You wallowed in your sadness, wondering if you hadn’t been good enough or if he hated you. Your best plan of action was to avoid him at all costs, which you did successfully until today. 

Jimin and Taehyung had been around to pick up the pieces and glue them back together. They hated how this situation had affected you. They knew you couldn’t separate your actions from your feelings and, try as you might, your denials just proved empty. Because you did have feelings for Min Yoongi. You always had and your little diary proved it and it was cemented further that night. It may not have meant much to Yoongi, having been more experienced, but it meant something to you. 

Yoongi was the first and only one you had gone that far with. Sure, you had made out with Jimin once, but it didn’t compare to Yoongi. Don’t tell Jimin, though. 

“He wants to talk later,” you whisper. 

Taehyung clicks his tongue. “So he can leave for another 3 years? I don’t think so.”

“He’s right, babe. We can’t keep you from doing what you want. And we’ll support your decisions, but just tread lightly, okay? Don’t fall for his charms so easily,” Jimin warns before he’s wrapping you up in a hug. 

“You’re our baby.”

“I love you guys. Now go out and have fun. I’m gonna freshen up and meet you out there, okay?” You force a smile and they nod, kissing your cheek before stepping out of your bedroom. 

Jimin and Tae remain at your side for a while until you’re caught in a conversation with relatives, and you forget about Yoongi even being in attendance. You decide to enjoy yourself and worry about him tomorrow.

Or so you thought.

With an empty cup, you head to the kitchen for a refill. You’re quite surprised to see it’s vacant as you go to the counter to make a drink.

“Have you been avoiding me?” you curse when you hear his voice. Hands shaking with nerves, you slowly turn around to face Yoongi. 

He’s leaning against the entryway, a smug smile on his lips, but you know better. He’s putting on a cool facade for you, but his eyes betray him. Yoongi looks over his shoulder, making sure the coast is clear before stepping further into the kitchen.

“Nope.” you shrug, turning your attention to your drink. “Just busy.”

“Hmm.”

“Did you need something?” you ask, bringing your drink to your lips. Yoongi watches you intently before he takes the cup from your hands and sets it back on the counter. 

“I need you,” he whispers before his lips are on yours. Immediately, your hands grip his shirt to pull him closer, a whimper escaping you when he’s got you pressed to the counter and his hands grip your waist.

“Yoongi,” his name slips from your lips, forgetting for a moment that things were rocky between you. Why couldn’t you just forget and let live?

“Kiss me,” he pleads in a low, needy tone that makes your head spin.

So you kiss him.

Again, and again, and once more for good measure.

Yoongi moans your name softly, making your body burn with desire as your fingers tug on his hair. He curses, his cock twitching in his pants as his hands squeeze your waist. What he wouldn’t do to kiss you from head to toe, spend every moment from now until morning devouring you while you call out his name.

“Fuck,” he curses, licking his lips as you pant, trying to catch your breath. Yoongi grins, thankful he’s had the same effect on you as you did on him. 

There’s so much he’d like to say, so much he wishes he could tell you, but like always, he’ll have to wait as footsteps fill the hall. 

Yoongi steps away, busying himself by getting a drink while you open the fridge to hide your face. It would easily give you away.

“There you are! I swear you’re hiding from me tonight,” your brother jokes as he leans against the fridge, completely ignoring Yoongi as he chugs his drink.

“Just needed a drink. You know how Aunt May gets at parties,” you lie but your brother laughs. 

“Did she tell you the vacation story again?” he asks with a shake of his head.

“Yes, but she gave me a check, so I listened for once,” you giggle, showing him the check your aunt wrote for you. 

“Nice,” your brother hugs you. “I think everyone’s wrapping up, if you wanna go say bye.”

“I should do that,” you agreed quickly, going around your brother to leave.

“We’ll have lunch tomorrow! I’m staying the night until my apartment is ready!” he calls. You throw a thumbs up over your head to acknowledge him before scurrying away from Yoongi’s heated gaze.

It’s almost an hour later before you’re back in your bedroom. You’ve taken a shower, put your pajama shorts on, and another oversized shirt you’ve stolen from the pile of Yoongi’s in your brother’s closet. You’ve managed to grow your collection while your brother’s been gone, and now nearly every shirt of Yoongi’s sits hidden in the last drawer of your dresser, just beneath your other pajamas.

When you get in bed, you’re not too surprised when there’s a light knock on your door. Nerves bubble up inside you as you get out of bed as quietly as possible. 

You know your parents have gone with your Aunt May for the night. She always has too many glasses of wine and your parents like to make sure she’s okay, often staying the night and having brunch in the morning. The only one home and upstairs in bed is your brother, his loud snores fill the home.

Slowly, you turn the doorknob, opening the door to see Yoongi.

“Hey,” he greets you in a whisper. You grip him by the shirt, tugging him into your bedroom. He stumbles over his feet before you shut the door to press him against it.

Yoongi grunts when his back meets the wood, cock twitching immediately as your lips press against his. Yoongi is caught off guard but his hands cup your face and before you know it, it’s you that’s pressed against the door.

“Yoongi,” you moan his name just like he remembers, cock throbbing in the confines of his jeans. He kisses you deeper, drinking you in as his tongue brushes yours. 

“Fuck, princess,” he groans as he kisses his way to your neck, teeth nipping and sucking at the sensitive skin. His mark is left behind, soothed by his fiery tongue as he moves downward, hands gripping the shirt you’ve stolen from him. At this point, it’s all he ever wants to see you in.

With ease, Yoongi kisses you as he leads you to your bed. He drops when the back of his knees hits the mattress, taking you with him. You squeal in surprise, giggling when he kisses you to muffle your sounds.

“We need to be quiet,” he reminds you. You nod, licking your lips as you move to straddle him, lacing your fingers with his as you press his hands over his head, grinding down on him. Yoongi moans your name, eyes fluttering shut as he enjoys your hips moving together.

Fuck, he was supposed to be talking to you, not grinding on you.

“Baby,” he breathes, throwing his head back when you grind on him harder, biting back moans as you release his hands to grip your tits. Fuck, why was he stopping this?

“We need to talk,” he reminds you as you kiss his neck, teeth sinking into his skin and your tongue laving over it to soothe the sting. Fuck, his head is spinning. This is everything he’s been dreaming of and more.

“So talk,” you say as you grip his shirt, tugging it over his head. Yoongi is malleable beneath you, at your mercy as you have your way with him. He’s so lost in you, intoxicated by your scent, your lips, your hips.

Yoongi enjoys himself for a moment longer before he kisses your lips and gently pushes you off his lap. He cards a hand through his hair, a small smile on his lips. “Talk, princess.”

You bite your lip. “I’d rather kiss.”

Yoongi chuckles. “So would I.”

You grin, reaching for him again, and Yoongi allows you to steal one kiss before he scoots away.

“We need to talk, baby. I don’t want there to be any misunderstandings between us. Not again. It hurt too much to be away from you for so long, and now that I have you in front of me, I realize just how much I missed you. How much I wish I had chased after you or at the very least, said something.” Yoongi clears his throat, he notes the way you’ve stiffened.

“I wanted to talk to you, Yoongi. Every time I tried, I thought of my brother. I thought of you not reaching out. I thought it was better this way,” you shrug, hiding your face in your hands.

“Princess,” Yoongi pulls you to his side. “I didn’t know you wanted me to. You avoided me after, and I was scared I had overstepped. I haven’t gone a day without thinking of you, of wishing I could have you in my arms just like this.”

You melt, kissing his cheek. “So, where do we go from here?”

“I want to be with you, princess. I want to take you out. I want to spoil the fuck out of you. I want you to be mine,” Yoongi admits as he caresses your face. You feel like you’re falling for him all over again, your heart thumping wildly in your chest as you wrap your arms around his neck.

“I’d love nothing more,” you smile widely, kissing his face again and again until he’s chuckling. His hands grip your waist, allowing you to kiss him as much as you want. You eventually kiss his lips, drowning in him until your back meets your bed, and he’s hovering over you.

“Yoongi,” his name rolls off your tongue in a heady tone that drives him insane, his hips grinding down on yours as you spread your legs for him, welcoming him in between. He hisses, cursing as his hair falls over his eyes and he huffs a breath as you brush it away, tugging at the roots to make him moan.

“Don’t start something you can’t finish,” he teases with a smirk.

“Who says I won’t finish it?” you goad him and he licks his lips. 

“Fuck, you have no idea what you do to me, baby. I want you so bad.” he kisses you again, sucking on your bottom lip as your hands move down to his body, nails digging into his shoulders. 

His name escapes you as his lips suck on the sensitive skin of your throat. Your fingers tug at his hair, making him groan against you. You want him desperately, hoping you’ll get all of him tonight, but you both freeze when your brother's snoring stops and his footsteps echo upstairs. 

“Fuck, fuck,” Yoongi pulls away, a hand carding through his mused hair. He looks at you with wide eyes as he bites his lip. 

This is not how you wanted your brother to find out. 

You both stay still, not making a sound until you hear the footsteps again and minutes later when the toilet flushes. Moments later, the snores resume. 

“Fuck,” Yoongi chuckles nervously. His hands tremble as he looks at you. He bites his lip nervously, his hands going into his pockets. “I should go to the couch.”

You don’t say a word as he grabs his shirt and tugs it back on. You watch him awkwardly from your bed, biting your lip. Yoongi walks over to you, gently pressing a kiss to your lips. 

“Goodnight, princess.”

Morning comes sooner than you’d like. Your brother’s loud music and off-key singing greet you the moment your eyes open. At least someone’s in a good mood, you think.

Groaning, you huff as you rub your eyes. You’re tired, having slept very little, thinking about every word exchanged with Yoongi. After deciding not to overthink, your mind filled with every kiss, every touch you exchanged and that led to your hand between your legs, softly moaning his name. You hated that he was just on the other side of your bedroom door, unable (and unwilling?) to do anything about it with your brother upstairs. But what did you expect? He’d run out of here the last time the two of you had been together, just like this. You couldn’t keep getting your hopes up. Three years ago you decided your brother was more important, so you’d write last night off as a one-time thing, again.

“Wake up!” Your brother shouts as he knocks on your bedroom door. You curse at him, groaning as you get out of bed. You hit your palm on the door in answer, enough for your brother to leave you alone while you go to the bathroom to brush your teeth. You look at your reflection, cringing when you see a small hickey on your neck. Damn Yoongi.

You head to your closet to change your shirt before opening your bedroom door and heading to the kitchen. 

Yoongi is at the stove with your brother, a spatula in his hand a second before he’s swatting your brother. “Don’t touch it!”

“It’s going to be burned!” your brother protests, but Yoongi swats his hand again and the two argue back and forth, only turning when you open the fridge door to grab the juice.

“Good morning,” Your brother grins. You grunt as Yoongi chuckles.

“Still not a morning person?” Yoongi laughs and you flip him off.

“Anyway,” your brother rolls his eyes. “I’m getting my apartment keys tomorrow so I can start moving in.”

“Congrats!” You exclaim as you take a seat on a stool. 

“Everything I own is in storage and Steph ordered a couch on Tuesday. Our bed will be there tomorrow afternoon, so I just need to move in with my stuff.” Your brother explains. 

“When do I get a tour?” You ask as you try your best to avoid looking at Yoongi. Your brother shrugs.

“You wouldn’t need a tour if you’d gone to Yoongi’s place that one time I invited you,” your brother laughs, turning to smack Yoongi on the shoulder.

“Yoongi’s place?” You choke out. 

“Yeah?” Your brother quirks his head. “Did I not mention it was in his building?”

“No,” you swallow thickly, reaching for your glass of juice to gulp it down. By the stove, Yoongi is gripping the spatula harder than necessary, the egg for gyeran bap sizzling on the pan. Perhaps he should have said something?

“Yoongi got me in with the landlord,” your brother grins. “I can’t wait to move in with Steph. It’s nice to be home after traveling so much. It’s exhausting.”

“When are you proposing?” You smile mischievously as your brother whips his head. He rubs the back of his neck and Yoongi smirks behind him. Your brother had met Steph on one of his trips home, they’d been together for almost three years now.

Your brother pats his pocket and out comes a small black velvet box. 

“Shut up!” You shout as you set your glass down on the counter with a thud. Yoongi chuckles as he turns the stove off and begins plating the food. 

“I had Yoongi help me pick it out,” your brother admits as he opens the box, and a gorgeous ring sits nestled in the middle. 

“Oh, she’s gonna flip!” You squeal as you jump up and down. Your brother laughs, shutting the box in case your excitement knocks the ring out of his hands. 

“I’m gonna wait until we’re settled in our apartment before proposing,” your brother explains as he thanks Yoongi with a nod when he places the food in front of the two of you. “So don’t go opening that big mouth of yours, brat!”

Offended, you place your hand on your chest. “Me?!”

“You’re easy to read,” Yoongi says with a shrug as he takes a bite of his food. “Plus, you’re not as quiet as you think.”

You stare at him, mouth agape as he meets your gaze, fiery and knowing. Perhaps he had heard you last night…

“See, he knows what I’m talking about,” your brother is oblivious as he eats his food. “I wanna tell Mom and Dad first and of course plan it out perfectly and that’s going to take a while.”

“We’ll help with whatever you need!” You exclaim and Yoongi laughs. 

“I’m being volunteered to help?”

“Yes!” You huff with a roll of your eyes. “Why wouldn’t you? You got plans?”

“Nope,” Yoongi chuckles before turning to your brother. “You know I’ll help with whatever you need. Just say the word.”

“Thanks, man,” your brother smiles brightly. “And of course, I’ll help with whatever you need when it’s your turn.”

You freeze, looking away from Yoongi to stare down at your plate. A short silence follows and Yoongi scrounges up a passing smile. 

“Uh, thanks.”

Your brother nods, groaning when his phone rings on the counter. He answers it immediately and is soon rushing off when he’s informed his apartment key is ready today if he wants it early, but he’s got an hour to pick it up before the landlord leaves for the day. 

“I’ll be back, maybe. Steph and I want to get some of her stuff in there today from her parents’ house so I might be back later. Mom and Dad are still with Aunt May so I’ll text you!” 

Your brother waves and before you can blink, you hear his car peeling out of the driveway, music blasting loud enough to rattle the windows. You’re sure your neighbors will be glad when he’s gone. 

Silence fills your home after your brother’s gone. You wash the dishes and head to your room to change, finding Yoongi has done the same. 

Eyeing you hungrily, Yoongi takes in every bit of skin showing where your dress ends just above your knees. He smiles when he sees how flustered you’ve become, turning your head just to avoid his gaze but display the small mark he left last night. 

Biting his lip, he keeps himself from saying something explicit, offering you a compliment before asking about your plans. 

“I was going to head outside to clean up any mess left behind,” you shrug and Yoongi follows you toward your backyard. 

Most of it is clean but a few cups and plastic cutlery litter the ground. You’re thankful nothing nasty has fallen into the pool and you debate inviting Tae and Jimin over for a swim. 

“The party was fun last night,” Yoongi comments as he picks up a trash bag left sitting on a table. 

“Yeah, Jimin almost convinced my mom to do body shots off him,” you roll your eyes in annoyance, glad you were able to swoop in and escort your mother away. 

Yoongi’s laughter fills the air, his eyes closed as his head is thrown back. His hand rests on his stomach as it begins to ache. 

“I would have paid money to see that,” he says once he’s controlled his laughter but it still lingers in his words. 

“Yoon!” You whine, shoving him playfully. “That’s my mother.”

“She knows how to have a good time,” Yoongi smiles smugly and you huff. 

“Gonna get her to do body shots off of you at the next party then,” you grumble. 

Yoongi grins wolfishly and you shove him again. He cackles when you try a third time and miss his chest; his hand wraps around your wrist before he raises it to his lips to kiss your skin. 

“I’m kidding,” Yoongi says with a gummy smile that makes your heart flip in your chest. You could melt just looking at him. 

The late spring heat begins to get to you as you ignore him and finish cleaning up. He’s got a shit-eating grin the whole time, satisfied with himself for annoying you. It reminds him of the times you’d hang around him, always with a quip at the ready to shut him or your brother down. It’s good to know he can still get under your skin and take what he gives out just like he does with you. 

“Here,” you growl as you shove a cold water bottle into his hands once you’re done cleaning up the backyard. He thanks you, taking the lid off and squeezing it harder than necessary to splash you and himself in the process. 

“Min Yoongi!” You scream his name as you step back and start pulling at your sundress, thankful you’ve put on a bathing suit underneath it. 

“Whoops, sorry,” Yoongi shrugs as he sips his water and you snatch it from him to spray him with it. His shirt clings to his body and you stare with lustful eyes as Yoongi simply takes it off. 

“See something you like?” He asks cheekily as he steps closer to you but you’re left speechless and frozen in your spot. Your body is warm, from the heat or Yoongi—you’re unsure— as you do the first thing that comes to mind. 

A splash is heard as you jump into the pool. Yoongi is left flabbergasted in his spot before he joins you with a cannonball right beside you. 

“You’re insufferable,” You hiss as you wipe the water off your face. Yoongi swims closer to you until he’s but a hair's breadth away. 

“And yet you still like me, princess.”

Laughter is the first thing your brother hears as he opens the front door. He’s in a hurry, having realized halfway to the landlord’s office that he’s forgotten his wallet. 

Normally, he wouldn’t worry about it but he was told to bring his ID to pick up his keys. So he turned around and rushed home taking a few yellow lights that may have been turning red by the time he crossed the intersection.

He knows exactly where to find his wallet (on the coffee table), having tossed it there before helping Yoongi cook, assuring himself he wouldn’t forget it if he had to go out, but alas here he is. 

The back door of his home is slightly ajar and he’s about to scold you when he hears you and Yoongi’s distinct laughter. He grabs his wallet off the coffee table and heads to the back door where he pauses. 

You and Yoongi are laughing, splashing each other with water, and climbing out of the pool just to cannonball back in. Your brother smiles, shaking his head as he notes how the two of you steal glances at each other. 

He may be overprotective but he wasn’t an idiot. He could see the way you looked at his best friend and it wasn’t until the past year that he noted the way Yoongi would look at you. Well, not you but pictures of you that your brother would show him whenever he was back in town. 

“She’s going on vacation with Jimin and Tae,” he remembers telling Yoongi the last time as he sat on Yoongi’s old gray couch. “They’re going to some beach resort.”

Yoongi had nearly ripped the phone out of his hand to see the pictures. Your smile is bright and wide in every photo. It all made sense then, the brightness in Yoongi’s eyes but sadness still lingered in the dark depths. Perhaps it wasn’t his place to stand between you if it meant the two of you could be happy. 

But nothing ever changed. 

You still avoided Yoongi at every chance and as hard as your brother tried to get the ball rolling, it didn’t. You were busy. Always so busy, too busy for him and too busy for Yoongi. 

Now stumbling into the both of you alone, he wonders if something was there, if it always was and he was just unaware.  

He feels like he’s intruding now. He’s gotten what he came for and he shuts the door when you squeal Yoongi’s name once again after he’s splashed you. He smiles to himself as he takes his leave. 

“You’re so annoying!” You yell when the water hits your face once again. This time you were swimming laps and Yoongi was ahead of you, kicking his feet harder than necessary just to splash more water in your face and causing you to lose. 

Yoongi smirks when he reaches the end of the pool, waiting for you to arrive before he climbs out. 

“Thought you were the captain of the swim team,” Yoongi shrugs, a teasing smile on his lips as you finally reach him. 

You pull yourself out of the pool to sit beside him, glaring. 

“I was the towel girl! And only because Jimin was on the team,” you grumble, shoving him to the side when his smile grows wider. 

“Come on, Little Mermaid, let’s get you inside,” Yoongi rises to his feet, offering you his hand that you swat away. He rolls his eyes, picking up his shirt from the ground and your dress as you get up and join him. 

Yoongi leads you inside the house, puddles forming on the floor where you walk. 

“We’re making a mess,” you groan.

“We’ll clean it up,” he assures you. 

“Come on, it’ll be easier if we contain it to one floor,” you take Yoongi’s hand and he stumbles after you as you lead him to your bedroom, locking the door and leading him to your bathroom. 

Yoongi’s heart is racing. He bites his lip as he watches you turn the shower on. When you start to take off your swimsuit, he turns his back to you. 

“I can wait my turn in the room. I’ll just need a towel to dry off with,” he says nervously. 

“Get in, Yoongi,” you demand as you step into the shower, hot water enveloping your body and making you groan. 

Yoongi hesitates for a moment before you speak again. “It’s nothing you haven’t seen already.”

Yoongi’s face flushes with heat. He slowly takes his board shorts off and steps in with you. Your eyes are closed as you stay under the water and a shiver runs down his spine. 

Slowly, your eyes open and your hands reach for him. You smile softly when water soaks him, his hair sticking to his forehead as he smiles at you. 

You’re still unsure of where you stand, still cycling through your feelings, and knowing this path could lead you to happiness but also despair once again. You’re not sure you could overcome this heartbreak again but with Yoongi standing in front of you in silence, lost in those same thoughts, you kiss him to silence them. 

There’s no rush in your kiss, no urgency, nothing but soft lips and whimpered moans. Yoongi cups your face gently, delicately, almost afraid you’ll break if he lets go. Your hands rest on his shoulders, warm and wet underneath your palms as your lips part for him. A muffled moan leaves you, a groan soon after when your back meets the iciness of the wall behind you. 

Yoongi’s palm hits the wall with a soft slap. His fingers grip your chin to tilt your head upward, exposing more of your neck as his lips trail wet kisses downward.

“I’ve missed you,” Yoongi admits quietly against your skin. You’re positive his words weren’t meant for you to hear but you hold him tighter.

“I wanted to reach out,” you say with a shaky breath. “But he was so glad there was nothing between us. Every time I tried, I thought of him and closed myself off. I figured it would be easier to forget you but it never was.”

“Baby,” Yoongi’s tone is soft, his gaze blurry as tears fill your eyes and his. 

“I’m sorry,” you sniffle, shaking your head as he hugs you. You don’t want to let him go, not again. Your brother will have to understand, he’ll just have to, and if not…

“Don’t think about it right now, okay? We can talk to him together or I can do it alone. There’s no rush, princess. He’s not going anywhere,” Yoongi kisses the top of your head. 

Gently, he wipes your tears before he’s washing your hair. His fingers massage your scalp, humming as he goes. He helps you wash your body, no touch leading to more and you shyly return the favor in between kisses and serene smiles. 

Though you still feel apprehensive about moving forward, you trust that this time will be different. Maybe you’ve become an optimist or maybe you just want to fool yourself into thinking so. Whatever it may be, you hope you’re not left standing on your own in the end. 

After your shower, you dry off in your bedroom. You’ve put one of Yoongi’s shirts on and he’s borrowed a pair of shorts you’d stolen from him. 

“I want those back,” you tell him as you get in bed with him beside you. 

“Aren’t you just a little thief,” he scoffs as he wraps around you to pull you close. Your head rests on his bare chest, your index finger tracing patterns on his skin. 

“It’s all I had,” you murmur, ignoring the ache in your throat from unshed tears. 

“I have more clothes at home for you to take,” he promises, rubbing your shoulder. 

“I’ll take a bag with me, then,” you sneer. He pinches your thigh playfully. 

“Hey!”

“Swiper, no swiping!”

“Aw. Man!” You laugh, poking Yoongi in the ribs. He winces, sticking his tongue out at you before you’re both startled by his phone vibrating on your nightstand. 

Your brother’s name appears on the screen and you both freeze. Carefully, Yoongi untangles himself from you before answering the call, selecting speakerphone and placing his finger over his lips. 

“Hello?”

“Hey, go home and grab an overnight bag. It’s my last night at home and I want to spend it with you and my sister.”

“I thought you and Steph were going to move her stuff in?” Yoongi asks.

“We got most of it but her parents want to take her to dinner. This is her first time moving out so it’s a big deal. Her siblings are a little upset, as well. She’s the first to move.” 

“That’s gotta be rough,” Yoongi states. He knows your parents were used to your brother coming and going so there was no big to do or celebration for him. 

“Yeah, but they’ll be able to visit often. We live a few blocks away from her parents home. Anyway, I’ll be another hour or so. I have to drop off Steph and then grab dinner for us. I’ll call when I’m close so you can help me bring the food in. I gotta go,” your brother doesn’t let Yoongi get another word in before he hangs up.

“Guess I’m staying the night,” Yoongi chuckles as you wrap your arms around him. 

“Good. I like it when you’re here,” you kiss his cheek before getting out of bed and putting on a pair of shorts. 

“Come on, let’s go to your place.”

“You just want to take more of my stuff,” Yoongi chuckles as he gets up and pops into your closet for a shirt. 

“I’ll see when we get there.” You smile, pressing a quick kiss to his lips before taking his hand to lead him out of your bedroom and out of your home. 

“Don’t expect much,” Yoongi tells you as he unlocks his front door. “I wasn’t expecting guests.”

“Lemme in!” You pout, nearly stomping your foot on his unwelcome mat. The cat flipping you off totally sets off the mood. Yoongi didn’t like visitors much less those unannounced, so this was an enormous deal for him.

“I’m going! I’m going!” He exclaims as you slide your hands under his shirt, wanting to feel his body once again and knowing you’d end up making out on his doorstep if he didn’t let you in soon. 

With an exaggerated flair, Yoongi opens the door and allows you in. You nearly tackle him out of the way in your haste inside. 

Yoongi’s apartment is so him. The living room is large with an old gray couch, black cushions fluffed up, and sitting on top. His coffee table is small but littered with magazines and books half read and forgotten. 

On the wall opposite the couch sits a large TV mounted in line with the couch. The TV stand beneath it is simple, charcoal in color, and holds all of Yoongi’s consoles and a few board games. 

In the corner, a black guitar sits on its stand and Yoongi gives you a minute to browse his game collection.  

“I’m gonna pack a bag while you snoop,” he calls as he heads to his bedroom. 

“I’m not snooping!” You shout in response but his laughter is the only answer you get. 

However, you linger at his video games, several titles sounding familiar and you gasp when you see a binder tucked under one of the consoles. You open it, surprised to see old Pokémon cards followed by old Yu-Gi-Oh cards. You had your own set tucked in the back of your closet, collecting dust and holding precious memories of your past. 

You set the binder back in its place before going down the hallway toward Yoongi’s bedroom. 

The bedroom door is cracked and you push it open further. Yoongi looks up from his duffel bag sitting on the bed. His closet is open and he waves his hand toward it. 

“Pick a few things you like,” he simply says as he walks to his dresser to get a pair of socks and some underwear. You smile when you go through every shirt once and then twice, picking up a few you like. 

Yoongi chuckles when he sees your hands full. He takes them from you and folds them neatly to stuff on top of his other belongings. 

“Guess I’ll have to go shopping soon,” he muses as he sets the bag on his nightstand and reaches for you. 

“Come here.”

You do so, kissing his cheek to make him blush when he drops the two of you on his bed. 

You scoot further, getting comfy and staring up at the ceiling. You wonder how wonderful it would be to wake up just like this, wrapped in Yoongi’s embrace every morning. 

Yoongi scoots closer, his fingers lacing with yours. 

“Tell me everything I missed,” Yoongi whispers as he brings your hand to his lips, planting a soft kiss on your hand. 

“Where to begin?” You muse as you turn to face him. His gaze bores into yours and he looks so cute with his hair splayed out on his pillow and his soft pink lips turned upward in an encouraging smile. 

You collect your thoughts, soon telling him about everything he missed. The struggles of university, the little fights with friends, your new favorite foods, and ones you couldn’t stand the sight of. You talked of vacations and concerts, jobs you were considering applying for, and those you wanted to avoid, and Yoongi listened intently. He took mental notes, thought of date ideas based on your interests, and laughed when you did. 

“What about you?” You ask when you’re done. 

“Hmm?”

You laugh. “What were you up to?”

“Oh, you know, the usual,” Yoongi shrugs noncommittally and you poke his chest. With a laugh, he takes your finger and brings it to his mouth, teeth nipping your fingertip. 

“Hey!”

A smile tugs at his lips when he releases you. Sighing, he looks up at the ceiling for a moment. “Parties, work, made a few new friends. Not a lot, honestly.”

You climb on his lap, straddling his hips. Yoongi’s hands go to your waist, sliding under your shirt to feel the warmth of your skin. 

“How many nights did you spend in bed thinking of me?” You ask boldly, heart racing in your chest. 

“All of them,” he answers honestly as his hand moves to cup your face, bringing you to his lips. 

A needy moan escapes you when his teeth tug on your bottom lip, his other hand moving down the curve of your back to grab a handful of your ass. 

“Always thought of you. Of seeing you again. Of holding you again, kissing you. There’s not a moment I didn’t think of you. Never knew if I could ever have you,” Yoongi admits. 

“Yoongi,” you say his name breathlessly, gripping his shirt to make sure he won’t disappear this time. 

Yoongi swallows thickly as he looks up at you. He sighs heavily, pushing your hair out of your face. 

“I’m sorry I didn’t try harder. I’m sorry I let you go so easily. I never want to make you feel like that again. That weekend meant something to me. I never want you to think that it didn’t.”

Softly, you caress his cheek. Your gaze is intense as you refuse to look away from him. His hands settle on your hips, more for him than for you, needing something to anchor him. 

“After you left, in the morning he came to my room happy I’d gotten over my crush on you,” you explain, batting away the tears that form. “I don’t want to lose either of you.”

Yoongi takes your hands in his, fingers laced as he squeezes tight. “We’ll tell him about us this time. He’ll understand now.”

“You think so?” You bite your lip as you ponder what your brother’s reaction will be. You haven’t talked much since he got back in town, his impending move taking up most of his time and now his soon-to-be-fiancée.

“He will. It won’t be like last time. I swear,” Yoongi’s tone is firm, already decided. 

“Okay,” you nod, curling into his side as he kisses the top of your head. 

Yoongi holds you for a few more minutes before the two of you leave his home. He treasures the last few minutes with you before he has to keep his hands to himself for the rest of the night. 

“Who else is coming?” You ask when Yoongi and your brother set the bags of takeout on the table. 

“Just us?” Your brother responds, puzzled. “Why?”

You wave your hand at the bags and your brother shrugs. “I’m hungry. I'm a growing boy.”

“Yeah,” Yoongi huffs laughter. “Growing to be a pain in the butt.”

“I resent that! Now sit down and let’s eat!” Your brother grins as he hands out random bags to you and Yoongi to unpack while he grabs condiments out of the fridge and some cutlery from a drawer. 

“I don’t want to hear you groaning later when you can’t find the Tums,” you roll your eyes at your brother but he laughs. 

“You don’t have to worry about me,” he says as he points to a bag on the couch. It’s red and has a zipper, resembling a school supply bag but when you take a peek inside you cackle. 

“Laugh now, brat, that’s your future,” your brother scoffs.

You look at the contents of the bag again and giggle. It’s stuffed to the brim with over-the-counter medication, most of them for your brother’s tummy troubles; Imodium, Tums, Pepto, and Gas-x.

“Yoon,” you call as you set the pouch back down on the couch after zipping it back up. “I recommend you sleep on the couch tonight.”

“Hey!” Your brother exclaims. “I’m not that bad.”

You and Yoongi share a look before you turn to your affronted brother. “You are that bad.”

Cursing, your brother ignores the two of you as he takes a bite of his taco, drowning it in lime juice and hot sauce. 

He grumbles under his breath for most of the meal while you and Yoongi exchange glances.

Thirty minutes later, the three of you are piling onto the couch. You’ve got one end and Yoongi has the other. Your brother settles on the recliner as he watches the movie he picked out. His hand has been rubbing his stomach for a few moments and his bag of goodies (as he calls it) lays open at his side. 

“I bet the little sister did it,” he says as he rocks in the recliner before fishing a Tums out of his bag. 

“Dude,” Yoongi curses. “It just started.”

“It’s not like it’s a crime,” you shrug. You’ve already seen the movie before but your brother was intrigued and nothing else sounded like a good watch while in a food coma. Besides, you did enjoy the film anyway. 

“If I fall asleep, let me know if I’m right,” he yawns as he rubs his stomach one more time. 

It’s not long until he’s snoring in the chair, drowning out the movie, and leaving you and Yoongi to secretly hold hands under a couch cushion. 

“He’s down for the count,” Yoongi whispers as he shuts and locks your door after getting your brother up to bed. 

“Are you sure?” You ask, panicked.

Yoongi nods. “He took some melatonin and knocked out.”

You hush Yoongi, pressing your finger to his lips. You wait a moment, ignoring the heat of his lips on your skin. You’re startled when your brother’s snore rattles the home.

“Told ya,” Yoongi chuckles. You move your finger off his lips, but Yoongi wraps his hand around your wrist to plant a kiss on the sensitive skin. You watch him with a heated gaze, licking your lips when his eyes lock on yours.

It’s not long until the both of you are over each other, kissing urgently on your way to your bed. Yoongi climbs on you as your hands grip his shirt, nearly tearing it off his body in your haste.

Chuckling, Yoongi removes his shirt and tosses it on the floor. You lie beneath him, your hands roaming across his broad chest, pulling him close to kiss him again. 

A growl escapes him. He ignores the throb of his cock when he realizes you’re wearing one of the shirts you stole from him. 

“Baby,” he rasps. His low voice sounds grave as he curses, grabbing your thighs in his hands and tugging you toward him. 

“Yoongi,” you gasp, immediately covering your mouth with your hand. 

Both of you freeze, hearts thudding obscenely loudly as you wait for the tell-tale snore that comes a moment later. 

Yoongi sighs in relief as he grips your panties and rips them down your thighs. He pockets them before you can protest.  He bunches your shirt and has you bite down on it. 

“Not a sound, baby. We can’t get caught,” he says as you nod, already drooling on the shirt.

Smirking, Yoongi palms his cock as he spreads your legs with his other hand. 

“Touch yourself for me, baby. Show me how you pleasure yourself when you think of me,” he instructs as he sits on the edge of the bed. 

You bite back a moan, shyly spreading your legs as he continues to palm his cock over his shorts. His chains shine in the light of your bedroom, and you wonder what they’d feel like dragging across your heated skin as he hovers above you, filling you full of his cock. 

“Yoongi,” you breathe as your eyes meet his, and your hand moves from your breast down to the apex of your thighs. Yoongi follows the movement, cursing when your fingers land on your clit. 

You’re slow with your movements, gently rubbing your clit in circles. Pleasure courses through you. You become aware of how wet you are when you move your hand lower. 

Yoongi licks his lips as he watches you, nearly growling when you spread your fingers and your arousal coats them both generously.

Without blinking, Yoongi strips until he’s bare. His tongue peeks from between his lips as he wraps his hand around his length. He’s slow with his strokes, eyes hooded and focused on your wet cunt. 

Cursing, Yoongi feels his heart flutter when his name tumbles from your lips. Your head lolls back as you arch, your fingers sliding in and out of you faster and faster. Your legs shake, gasps spilling from your lips as you look up to see Yoongi jerking off to you.

“Is this how you touched yourself while thinking of me?” He asks with a lustful look that sends tingles down your spine.

“Only thought of you,” you whisper. “Thought of your cock filling me up, making me cum, making me cream.”

“Fuck,” Yoongi groans deeply as he moves forward, his hand grabbing the nape of your neck as he pulls you into a kiss that makes your whole body tingle with pleasure. 

Soon, his fingers replace yours. His thumb rubs your clit as his lips smother your moans. Your hands wrap around his dick, moaning as you stroke him with your wet fingers. 

“Fuck, baby. Just like that,” he encourages as he rocks his hips.

His lips mark your neck in tiny constellations that you’ll smile about later on when he takes a photo of his hand wrapped around your throat and your hickeys peeking through.

“Focus on me, love.” Yoongi pouts as his thumb adds more pressure to your clit, and you whimper. Your eyes are wide, teeth sinking into your bottom lip as your legs tremble. 

A smirk appears on Yoongi’s face. “That’s it, baby. Tell me who’s making you feel this good.”

“You,” you answer in a gasp. “Yoongi!”

Yoongi kisses you, silencing you as you cum on his delicious fingers. You moan as his tongue meets yours, your fingers threaded in his hair as you soak the sheets beneath you.

Slowly, Yoongi removes his fingers, chuckling when you groan. 

“Fuck, I can’t wait for you to fuck me.” You giggle, catching him off guard. 

He puckers his lips in surprise, cheeks pink as he brings his fingers to his lips to suck clean.

“Think you can handle it, princess?” Yoongi goads.

You nod. “I’ve thought about it a lot.”

Yoongi curses, carding his fingers through his hair as he ignores the twitch of his cock. You notice, grinning as you wrap your hand around him once more. You move until Yoongi settles between your legs, his cock head pressed to your clit as you grind against him.

“Shit, babe. If you keep doing that, I might just cum,” Yoongi admits ruefully. 

You smile devilishly as you continue, moving forward to kiss Yoongi, biting his bottom lip and tugging at it just to make him growl. 

He’s at your mercy, moaning softly as you move faster. Fuck, you’re soaking his cock, drenching every inch, and the head keeps rubbing on your clit. He’d love nothing more than to have you wrapped around him, screaming his name for the whole block to hear, but he can’t. Not yet at least. 

For now, he’ll have to settle for this. Though you don’t make it easy on him as you moan his name and sink your teeth into his shoulder to muffle another scream of his name as your thighs quiver and you cum with his head between your lips. Yoongi chuckles, licking his lips as he wraps his hand over yours on his dick. His pace is faster as he looks at your wet cunt, biting back an earth-shattering moan of your name as he cums all over your pussy and clit. 

The warmth spreads along your skin as you fall back onto the pillows with a goofy grin. Yoongi smiles, kissing your lips quickly before he kisses down your body. 

He paused at your tit, taking the hard nipple into his mouth, teeth gently tugging it before releasing it and moving to the other. Your hand grips his hair, cursing when the drag of his chains leaves goosebumps in their wake as he kisses further down your body until he’s grabbing your thighs in each of his gorgeous hands. 

With ease, Yoongi places your legs over his broad shoulders as he settles between your thighs. His mouth waters at the sight of your pussy, arousal, and his cum mixed on your mound. 

Teasingly, he licks your clit first. Slowly circling it just to watch you twitch as your hand covers your mouth to keep quiet. Yoongi smirks to himself as he repeats the action, muffling his moan in your inner thigh as he gets the first taste of your mixed pleasure. 

Nothing could ever taste as wonderful.

Yoongi’s a menace with his tongue, more so than you could have ever imagined. Your fantasies are nothing but weak interpretations of reality. His tongue licks every bit of you, cleaning up your cum and his as if his life depends on it. 

It doesn’t take him long to get you to cum one more time. 

“Come on, princess,” he encourages with a sweet coo. “Just one more for me, darling. You can do it, right?”

“Yes,” you breathe as your eyes flutter shut, your lashes kissing your cheeks. 

“Mm,” Yoongi hums. “Maybe next time it’ll be my cock instead of my tongue and fingers.”

You whine, begging him to fuck you as his fingers curl inside you, slowly pumping in and out as his lips wrap around your clit. 

“Please,” you beg. “I want your cock. Need it.”

Yoongi laughs, smiling as he swirls his tongue around your clit one more time. 

“So needy. I can’t wait to fuck you, baby. Spread you open and have you wrapped around me. Stuff you full of my cock until you can’t help but scream my name,” Yoongi states as you lose yourself in your orgasm, muffling your moans with your hand. 

Yoongi curses, licking his lips as he eats you out through your pleasure. He only slows when you tug his hair twice.

A soft kiss is pressed to your temple as he lies beside you. You’re worn out, and a little sleepy. You don’t want him to leave, but you know your brother would punch him or worse if he found Yoongi in your bedroom or even suspected it.

You’re honestly surprised you can still hear him snoring upstairs. Unaware of all that’s taken place just a floor below. 

“I wish you didn’t have to go,” you whisper as you feel him pull the covers over the two of you. 

“I know, baby.” Yoongi sighs. “I’ll stay as long as I can. It won’t always be like this.”

“Promise?” You ask softly. 

“I promise,” he assures you with a kiss to your lips.

Yoongi holds you until he’s sure you’re asleep. He wonders what it would be like to stay in bed with you all night. To wake up to your beautiful smile each day. 

The ache that follows keeps him awake until he’s sneaking out of your bedroom door, fully clothed. 

When he’s on the couch in the living room, his thoughts cloud his mind preventing him from sleeping. 

He should just tell your brother. After all, you were all adults and he knew he wanted to pursue this. He hadn’t been with anyone since you and he didn’t want to be with anyone else. Of that he was sure. 

What if he lost you and his best friend, though? Would he be able to move on?

Yoongi sighs heavily as he closes his eyes and throws his arms over them. It looks like another sleepless night for him.

What a shock.

The next morning is busy.

Your parents are back home for breakfast. Your mother and father make food for everyone before heading to your brother’s apartment to clean it despite your brother’s protests.

“It’s clean to the landlord’s standards, not mine,” your mother states as she heads out the door with her cleaning supplies and your father behind her.

Yoongi chuckles as he leans against the counter. “She did the same thing to my place with my mom.”

“I don’t know why I tried talking her out of it. Oh, well.” Your brother shakes his head as he gets a phone call from the movers. 

Yoongi, your father, and your brother have spent most of the morning moving your brother’s boxes to the garage. Anything he deemed fragile was piled up in his car. 

Since your brother mostly lived abroad, and he was getting new furniture with Steph, he wasn’t taking too much with him. Your job was to unpack with Steph, and Yoongi’s was to help your brother unload his car and make sure your mother didn’t go overboard in her cleaning.

Your brother should be moved in by the end of the night, which meant there was no real reason for Yoongi to hang out at your place without an excuse. Yoongi had texted you assurances very early in the morning and it’s not like your brother wouldn’t laze around at your parents’ place like before, just less so.

However, that meant his place would be off-limits as well if your brother showed up unexpectedly. It didn’t matter, Yoongi would figure it out.

He promised.

Hours later, you’re finishing up at your brother’s place. Most of his items are unpacked with his help and Steph’s. Your mom has finished cleaning to her satisfaction and headed out with your father.

Your brother bought you all lunch, and now that you were done, there was nothing else to do but leave.

“I’ll take her home,” Yoongi offers. “I have some errands to run anyway.”

“You sure?” your brother asks as he throws the trash into the trashcan. 

“Yeah, gotta get a few things at the store,” Yoongi shrugs, trying to appear nonchalant. You pull your phone out, asking Jimin to cover for you for a few hours in case your parents or brother ask.

[Jimin-bee]: whatcha gonna do?

[you]: talk

[Jimin-bee]: TALK ha! Let me know when you’re done and use condoms

You don’t reply.

“That’s fine,” you fake a yawn. “I’m tired anyway. You enjoy your first night here.”

Your brother nods, smiling as he pulls you into a hug. “Come over whenever.” 

“Sure,” you nod.

“But call first,” your brother laughs before he walks you to the door with Yoongi. You wave at Steph as you leave with Yoongi in tow. The both of you walk down the hall toward the stairs, waiting for the door to shut before Yoongi pulls you into the stairwell.

“Fuck,” you moan when your back meets the wall. Yoongi captures your lips with his. Yoongi’s hand rests on the wall right beside your head as he kisses you deeply. Your hands immediately grab fistfuls of his shirt as you kiss him back, moaning when his hips press against yours.

“You’re already hard,” you giggle as he kisses down your jaw to your neck.

“I like kissing you,” he murmurs against your skin.

“Yoongi,” you moan as he sucks on your neck, his hand going to your hip to pull you toward him. You melt under his touch, only remembering where you are when the door slams from the next floor and footsteps echo as they grow closer.

The both of you pull apart, adjusting your hair as you take Yoongi’s hand in yours and head up the stairs. His place was on the third floor, far, far away from your brother on the first floor.

You don’t make eye contact with the man who passes by you on the stairs. Yoongi smiles to himself, hiding it with his hair before he goes stoic and looks up.

“Good evening,” he says simply as you continue heading up the stairs.

“Evening,” the man responds as he takes the stairs down. 

It only takes a few more minutes before you’re in Yoongi’s apartment, pressed to the door as you kick your shoes off.

Yoongi grins as he takes his shirt off while you tug your top off. You’ve wanted him since you saw him this morning. It was hard to watch him lifting heavy boxes with his veins looking so prominent. The way he shook his long hair out of his eyes or when his hands pushed it back. Memories of last night hit you hard when you looked at his hands, remembering what his fingers felt like inside you. 

Every time he laughed, your heart fluttered, wishing more than anything you could reach for him and hold him. Just touch him without your brother or parents having a problem with you two. You doubt your parents would have anything negative to say if you and him started dating but your brother’s discontent and possible fury kept you from exposing the relationship at the moment. It wouldn’t be like this forever, though. You had hoped your brother could understand, he was older now, more mature, right?

“What are you thinking, baby?” Yoongi asks softly as he cups your face. His thumb strokes your cheek as he locks eyes with you. You lean into his touch.

“Just want everyone to know about us,” you admit in a whisper, apprehensive of his answer.

“I want that too,” you perk up at his response, eyes shining with hope. 

“You do?”

“Of course, baby. It won’t always be like this. Soon, we’ll let them all know that you’re my girl. Just a little longer,” he assures you as you lean in to kiss him, fingers laced in his long locks as he leads you to his bedroom after locking his front door.

The next morning, you stir before you wake. Sleep clings to your eyes as you rub them, groaning when an alarm goes off.

“Ugh,” you grunt as you sit up, finally opening your eyes as Yoongi shuts the alarm off. 

“Sorry, babe. I have to work today,” he says as he kisses your cheek before getting out of bed. You grumble as you fall back onto the pillows. The shirt you took from Yoongi bunched at your hips, thighs smeared with your arousal from last night as he ate you out again and made you cum around his fingers twice.

“Don’t go,” you grumble as you roll over to face him. He chuckles as he looks over at you.

“I have to, baby. I asked for yesterday off because I knew your brother would want to hang out after graduation. Time to go make money.” Yoongi grabs his things and heads for the shower. “Wanna join?”

You kick the covers off you as you follow him into the bathroom, giggling when he opens the bathroom cabinet to show you toothbrushes, toothpaste, mouthwash, skincare, and lotions, all in bulk.

“I like to shop at the bulk stores,” he says shyly. “Easier to keep everything stocked when you work from home.”

“Cutie,” you smile, kissing his cheek before turning the shower on and stepping in. Yoongi follows you, kissing you when you’re both under the shower spray. You know this could easily turn to more if your hands wander too low and Yoongi has to clock in.

You take your time, feeling each other and sharing kisses until Yoongi gets out to grab your towel and wrap you in it before he wraps one around his waist. 

The two of you do your morning routines, and you smile to yourself when your toothbrush sits beside his own. 

Soon, you’re both dressed. Yoongi makes a pot of coffee, making it just the way you like it when a knock comes on the door.

Your eyes widen as Yoongi heads to the door, to look through the peephole.

“It’s your brother. Fuck,” he hisses.

You get out of your seat, run to the bedroom, and hide in the closet.

Yoongi looks over his shoulder to make sure you’re out of sight before he opens the door to let your brother in. He’s thankful he only had enough time to make your coffee before he came knocking. He’s not sure how he would have explained two mugs.

“Hey,” Yoongi greets him, as your brother lets himself in. “What’s up?”

“I texted you but you didn’t answer,” your brother explains as Yoongi shuts the door. 

“Sorry, I was in the shower. Just got out. I work soon,” Yoongi shrugs as he refrains from looking at the bedroom. He’s sure he’s thrown all the clothing in the hamper. He was gonna toss your clothing and his from yesterday into his washer while he worked, so you’d have something clean to go home in.

By the time he took you home, your parents should still be working, so nobody would know if you had spent the night elsewhere. 

At the moment, you were dressed in one of his shirts and sweatpants. You were going to lounge around his home until his workday ended and you had to go home for the night.

“Do you want to go get breakfast?” your brother asks Yoongi as he looks around the apartment. 

“Sorry, I can’t,” Yoongi says. “I’ve got to clock in a little earlier today.”

“Boo,” your brother laughs. 

You wish him away, wanting to leave the closet as soon as possible. Your heart is racing in your chest, and you almost wonder if they can hear it out in the living room.

“Oh, well,” your brother shrugs. “Maybe next time?”

“Yeah, sure,” Yoongi agrees as your brother walks toward the front door. He almost smiles in relief when they get to the door but your brother stops and turns on his heel at the last second.

Yoongi is confused as your brother heads for his bedroom.

“Dude!” Yoongi calls after him, palms sweating as he follows him as fast as he can, trying to keep from looking suspicious.

“My mom said our letterman jackets were in your closet. I’ll just check real quick,” Your brother explains as he beelines it for the closet. “Steph doesn’t believe I was on varsity.”

“I’ll check,” Yoongi says as he scans the room but doesn’t see you. He knows you ran into it and not the half bath in the hallway.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to barge in. I just remembered. I figured since I was already here,” Your brother looks sheepish, and apologetic as he opens the closet doors anyway and Yoongi can feel sweat beading on his brow.

Fuck.

You were fucked.

Your brother pushes a few jackets out of the way in his search, stepping in a little further as you pull your feet toward you and cover your mouth and nose to silence your breathing as much as possible.

Your brother steps on your toe, and you bite back a scream as he moves his foot and moves more clothing out of the way.

“Damn, how many clothes do you need? You have three of these shirts in three colors,” your brother laughs as he pushes them out of the way and turns to look at Yoongi.

Yoongi shrugs. 

There’s no way he won’t find you, and all he can do is take a step back to give you room to crawl out when you’re discovered.

“Ah, I see it,” your brother grins as he pushes some more thick coats out of the way and grabs his jacket. In his haste, he drops the hanger onto the floor.

When he bends down to pick it up, he makes eye contact with you. Your hand is still over your mouth, eyes wide as you look at him.

Your brother says your full name as he steps back and you crawl out of the closet before getting to your feet.

You wave weakly. “Hi.”

“What the fuck are you doing here? Why aren’t you home? Why are you wearing his clothes?” Your brother’s mind is whirling. The last thing he expected was to see you here!

“Um, you see,” you bite your lip, unsure of what to say.

“She spent the night,” Yoongi states.

Your brother whirls around to look at Yoongi, brows furrowed.

“Why?”

“Because he’s my boyfriend now,” you say sheepishly, avoiding eye contact.

“I need to sit,” your brother pulls Yoongi’s desk chair toward him and sits. His jacket falls to his feet as he inhales and exhales a few times.

“Mind telling me what’s going on with my little sister, dude?” Your brother asks his best friend. He figured you two liked each other, but what was this spending the night shit? So soon? Without even telling him first? The fuck?

“We just started dating Sunday,” Yoongi explains as he sits on the edge of his bed, now that he’s twenty percent sure your brother wasn’t gonna punch him in the face. You go sit beside Yoongi, lacing your fingers together. Your brother doesn’t miss the gesture.

“And you didn’t think to tell me first?” your brother can’t help but sound hurt. He thought the three of you were better than to keep secrets.

“We wanted to, but look at how you’re reacting,” you sigh, squeezing Yoongi’s hand. You can barely focus with your heart thundering in your ears. Your hands grow clammy in Yoongi’s hold but he says nothing as your brother shakes his head.

Here it comes.

“I’m upset!” Your brother exclaims. “You kept this from me!”

“Because you told me last time that you were glad I didn’t like Yoongi anymore! I couldn’t lose you, so I didn’t see Yoongi again until you invited him to my graduation.”

Your brother places his palms over his face, his elbows resting on his knees as he exhales. He had said that. However, that was three years ago before he knew much about love. He always wondered why you never came around when Yoongi was there, but now everything was falling into place.

If he was honest with himself, he wasn’t upset over you guys. He knew it was inevitable after your years of crushing on Yoongi, and Yoongi didn’t help himself in recent years. Maybe he would have peeped it earlier if he had noted the way Yoongi looked at photos of you. There was always something more in his gaze.

“You still should have told me,” your brother looks up, making eye contact with Yoongi and then you. “Either of you.”

“We’re sorry,” Yoongi apologizes. “We should have but we’re still taking this slow. We don’t want to make any mistakes. I can’t lose her for another three years again. The last time hurt too much,” Yoongi looks at you before looking at your brother. “It hurt us both.”

“The last time?” your brother is puzzled. He rises from his chair with his jacket in his hands. “What last time? You mean this has happened before?”

“Um, we kissed at my last graduation,” you smile wryly. “Surprise?”

Your brother runs his hand over his face. Man, all he wanted was breakfast and now he had all this information he hadn’t asked for.

“You know what, don’t tell me anymore. You guys have my blessing or whatever, not that you need it. This is fine, just be careful. Don’t hide shit from me anymore,” Your brother shakes his head as he heads for the door.

You grin, hugging Yoongi before you walk your brother to the front door.

You throw your arms around your brother and hug him tightly. “I love you.”

“I love you too, brat. No more secrets,” he reminds you as he releases you and shakes his head one last time. He steps out of the apartment and pauses, “You both owe me breakfast.”

“Will do,” Yoongi grins as he drapes his arm over your shoulder to pull you close. Your brother smiles, seeing the two of you together wasn’t as weird as he thought it would be.

It was your happiness that mattered most of all, right?

Three weeks later, you’re back in Yoongi’s apartment after a night out on the town. You had a wonderful dinner, followed by a romantic walk by the river.

You were eager to get back to his place, kissing him at every chance you got. He had his hand on your thigh the whole drive home, smirking when he’d catch you tracing the veins and his rings.

His hair was slicked back, his chains resting on his chest and his suit fit him perfectly. He had a certain confidence that had you wanting to lick him up and down in public. Yoongi wasn’t able to keep his eyes (or hands) off you in the black dress you wore. Your back was exposed with a low dip that ended right above your lower back. He loved feeling your skin beneath his palm as you walked until you were leading him to the car.

“Take me home,” you had whispered in his ear, biting the lobe before settling in the front seat. That alone was enough to get him to half-mast.

The past few weeks, you’ve taken it slow. You were kissing and making out almost every day. Sometimes he’d fuck you with his fingers or his tongue, and sometimes you’d suck him off but you never went all the way. 

You wanted to, tonight.

Yoongi’s hands grip your hips as your back meets the front door of his apartment. You giggle as his lips trail kisses down your jaw to your neck as your hands palm his chest on their trek to his pants pockets to fish out his keys.

“Fuck,” he curses, his breath fanning across your neck as you cup his erection.

“Oops,” you giggle as you squeeze him one more time before taking the keys out of his pocket. You hand them to him as he tries his best to get the key in the lock, but misses twice as he refuses to stop marking your neck.

“The faster you get me inside, the faster you can feel me wrapped around your cock,” you whisper as his teeth nip your skin.

“Fuck, okay. Yeah,” Yoongi breathes as he cards a hand through his hair. His thoughts are running rampant as he gets the key in the lock and turns it. He pushes the door open, grabbing your hand as he pulls you in.

You smile, kissing him as he shuts the door and presses you against it. One of his hands cups your face, and the other locks the door as he deepens the kiss.

You kick your shoes off, grunting as you trip over them. Yoongi chuckles, easily stepping out of his shoes.

A shirt here, pants there, your dress in a pool of fabric outside Yoongi’s bedroom door, and soon you’re in nothing but panties on his bed as he climbs on top of you between your legs.

Yoongi cups your cheek, his thumb caressing your skin. His dark eyes meet yours as he presses his lips to yours. 

Warmth pools in your belly as your thighs wrap around his hips to pull him closer. Yoongi moans softly as his cock presses to your panty-clad cunt. He breathes your name, trailing kisses to your neck as your fingers thread in his inky locks.

“Yoongi,” his name rolls off your tongue in a tone so sweet, he can almost taste it when you moan again.

“That’s it, love. Let me hear those moans, don’t be shy,” He encourages as he moves downward and your hands move to his shoulders for a moment before he’s kissing one breast and groping the other.

Yoongi takes his time with you, kissing and caressing every inch of your body. His lips mark your skin, his teeth nibble gently just to listen to you sigh. Your hands grip the sheets, tugging on them as he teases you.

“Yoongi,” you breathe, nearly melting into a puddle when his tongue swirls around your nipple, sucking it just to make you gasp as his large hand grips your thigh.

“Yes?” he asks with a lopsided grin. “What is it, baby?”

“Please, stop teasing me,” you plead, biting your bottom lip as his lips kiss down your body until he’s settled between your thighs. 

Yoongi smirks, his lips pressing a soft kiss to your mound. “Who’s teasing?”

“Yoongi!” 

Chuckling, Yoongi kisses your thigh as his fingertip circles your clit once. 

“Yoongi!”

He laughs, his gummy smile making you giggle. “I’ll stop teasing.”

“You promise?” you ask with a raised brow, but Yoongi doesn’t answer. Instead, he dips between your parted legs, his tongue licking your wet folds as your eyes flutter shut and you curse at the ceiling.

Yoongi doesn’t waste a second as he grabs handfuls of your thighs and pulls you closer. You squeal in surprise and laugh when he kisses your inner thigh. 

“Cutie,” he murmurs before he’s trailing kisses to the apex of your thighs. He’s slow and teasing with his tongue, listening closely to every gasp and moan that escapes your pretty lips. 

It’s not too long before your hand is gripping his thick hair, begging for more as he pushes two of his fingers inside you, curling them until you’re nearly screaming his name. 

“So fucking wet for me, princess,” Yoongi curses, licking his lips before going back to the task at hand. You curse, back arching and thighs trembling as blissful pleasure courses through your veins. 

“Yoongi! Baby!” You exclaim, thighs shaking as your breath grows ragged and your eyes squeeze shut. 

“Fuck,” Yoongi licks his lips as he watches you fall apart, pussy clenching around his fingers as his thumb rubs your clit and you cry out one last time before lying boneless on the bed. 

“Come here,” you demand when you catch your breath. 

Grinning, Yoongi kisses your clit one last time before moving beside you. 

You kiss him immediately, your hands cupping his face as he pulls you on top of him. Your legs go on either side of his hips as your wet cunt sits on his cock. 

“We should,” Yoongi kisses you. “Get a condom.”

You nod, kissing him again, your tongue meeting his as he reaches blindly on his nightstand. He chuckles, moving you off him for a moment to open the drawer, take a handful of condoms out, and set them on the nightstand within reach. 

“How many do you think we’ll need?” You ask with wide eyes.

Yoongi throws his head back and laughs, kissing your cheek when he calms down. 

“Hopefully all of them,” he smiles cheekily. “But let’s start with one for tonight.”

“Yes,” you agree as you kiss him again as Yoongi rips open the packet, tossing the wrapper on the nightstand. 

With ease, Yoongi is ready in seconds as he lies you down on the bed. He kisses you gently, his thumb stroking your cheek as he pulls away. 

His dark eyes lock on yours, and your heart flutters. 

“We can stop whenever you want to, princess. Just say the word, okay?”

“Yes,” you nod, kissing him deeply as he lines himself up at your entrance. 

You gasp when he pushes in, nails digging into his forearms as his face gets buried in your neck. 

“Fuck,” he curses as he gives you a moment to adjust. He kisses your neck, shoulders,, and cheek until you give him the go ahead to go further. 

Before too long, pleasure courses through you as you moan Yoongi’s name. 

“Fuck, love,” Yoongi nearly loses himself. You’re so warm and wet, tightening around him as he fucks into you again and again. He’s overcome with emotion as his eyes lock with yours. He never thought he’d get a second chance with you, not after he left so abruptly and there was no contact between you. He knows it’s probably too early in the relationship to say I love you, but he feels it in every fiber of his being. 

With every kiss, with every touch, with every sigh, he falls deeper and deeper in love and there’s nothing he would ever do to stop it.

You breathe his name, kissing him as he goes deeper and you fall, fall, fall into pleasure. 

This is better than you could have ever imagined. Better than all your daydreams and anything your imagination had conjured throughout the years. Love blooms in your chest as you grip his shoulder tights, your hands sliding down until your fingers lace with his. Pleasure courses through your veins, nearly consuming you.

“So big and thick,” you whisper, making Yoongi chuckle as he sucks on your neck. 

“I said that aloud didn’t I?” You feel the heat rise to your cheeks from embarrassment.

“You did,” Yoongi giggles as he kisses you again, his hips rocking into yours as your legs cling to his hips to pull him closer. 

“This is perfect,” you whisper as your body tingles and Yoongi’s fingers rub your clit. You shake, moaning as you meet each of Yoongi’s thrusts with your hips. 

“Yoongi!”

“That’s it, baby. Cum for me,” Yoongi instructs, kissing you as you tighten around him and lose yourself to the pleasure. 

Yoongi follows soon after, moaning your name in between pants before he pulls out of you. He discards the used condom quickly before lying at your side. 

“You okay?” He asks gently as he pulls you into his arms. You smile brightly, nodding. 

“Perfect,” you respond as you kiss his bare chest. “Can we do it again?”

Yoongi chuckles, shaking his head incredulously. 

“As much as you’d like, princess.”

© jjungkookislife - I do not allow reposts or translations of my work on any platforms, including Youtube. 

[mountkennedie]

Straggler

Kili Durin x human!reader

Summary: An au where everyone lives happily in erebor and kili is in love with you (lucky)

Warnings: ONLY TWO uses of y/n, and fluff ofc

A.N. i love kili and he loves me tbh.

Bagginshield mention lol.

Also: -ê khi love: my one love and Ghivashel: treasure of all treasures

Kili is 4'8, Reader is around 5'4

"You look beautiful in the sunlight," the dwarf beside you said. You jumped, you swore when you left this morning, and you didn't have any stragglers. However, here you are, with Kili Durin on your tracks. You weren't going to lie, you enjoyed the princes company, if only he gave you a warning beforehand.

You all had been thriving in Erebor upon a year now. Now that things had settled and riches distributed, everyone was able to return to a simpler life. Ori began exploring crochet after mastering knit. You enjoyed going on walks around the mountain, and Kili enjoyed you.

You looked down to him and furrowed your eyebrows, unsure if you heard what you thought you did. "I said um," he began to look sheepish, "you look beautiful in the sunlight, Y/n."

"Thank you," you bowed your head in appreciation, then began to continue your stroll when he said, "Wait!" He grasped your forearm, "may I join you this morning?" He gave you a warm smile in addition to the sweet eyes you could hardly resist.

"You already are KIli," I told him, returning the smile. "But sure, why not." He wasted no time in meeting you at your side. "I really love the view," your gaze followed over the trees and valleys and into the overwhelming beauty of Middle Earth. After being on the year-long quest and exhausting final battle, you can finally appreciate the scenery you're surrounded with. It sends waves of peace over you that you only wish to bask in until the end of time.

"So do I," he whispered. But instead of looking at the young rising sun over the horizon, his gaze on you didn't falter. To an onlooker, it would look as if his sight upon you had grown more intense.

You, of course, noticed this. "Kili, I'm serious!" You playfully shoved him to the side. You let laughter spill from your lips, and he joined you. You paced forward slowly, "you know... would you ever like to see it all?" Your voice matched your vision, very distant.

"All..?" He asked you whilst meeting your speed.

"Of middle earth. Would you ever want to see the entirety of our world?" You spoke quietly, thinking of how you would answer that question. In all honesty, you would. But not for a long time. You needed a couple of years before venturing on your next quest, and with the knowledge you now know, you would not want to go alone.

"I see the entirety of my world every day," he spoke softly. He stopped walking and looked at you. You halted and looked at him. He had a gentle smile on his face. Crossing the short distance, you stood before him.

"Must you always be a flirt?"

Looking up into your eyes, "I must," he mused.

"And why is that, Kili?"

"Y/n, -ê khi love, I think you know," he took your hand in his. He held you like you were the rarest treasure, and for how he was looking in your eyes, to him you were.

"Kili..." You were speechless. His eyes were studying every movement your face made, trying to learn as much as possible about what you were thinking. But you saved him the trouble, "amrâlimê." You had so desperately wanted to give that name to him. You smiled so brightly, and he returned it. It was debatable who out shined the other.

"Really?" He couldn't contain the excitement he felt inside. All the talks with his uncles about how properly court had finally paid off. He knew he needed to meet with Thorin and Bilbo as soon as possible, but it could still wait until he completed the courting tradition.

"So does that mean we'd give each other the braids?" You felt like a child for asking that question, but being human, this was new to you. Thorin had conveniently told about the practice yesterday.

"It does! It does, indeed." He reached back and released his shiny brunette hair for the silver clip he had installed and turned his back to you. You don't think you've ever seen him so eager. Upon picking up some strands, you heard your lover sigh deeply. If only you were a dwarf, to fully understand this significance. You've noticed Fili's braids. Maybe he's waiting on his turn since.

When you finish the braid, you let your fingers run through the rest of his locs, as if hypnotized. He turned to look at you, tears in his eyes. His hand took yours and placed a lingering kiss on the back of it. He did not break eye contact during the small gesture, and it sent waves of emotion through you. "Your turn, ghivashel."

His gentle tone woke you from your thoughts. You gasped a little and smiled. You turned your back to him and sucked in a breath, beyond excited to receive a braid of your own.

After finishing his portion, you hear Kili release an uneven breath. You turn around to see him with tears in his eyes. You don't ever think you have been gazed upon in such a way as he is gazing now. Eyes wet with tears, but full of passion and love that could never be shown to anyone other than his One.

You held his face in your hands and looked deep into those eyes. He leaned his forehead up to rest against yours, and you closed the gap. The feeling surging between the two of you could never be measured. Without a word, you both aimed for each others lips, a final collision to seal tradition.

It was languid and slow but full of life. Pulling away, you both looked each other in the eyes. "If only I could tell you how many nights I've laid awake... waiting for this moment, -ê khi love." His eyes looked over your face as if taking it all in for the first time. Not getting enough of every inch it crossed over.

"You will never have to wait again."

[tiredtxmblrvet]

Fic Rec Friday #3!

If y'all want more fic rec fridays, check out @mediumgayitalian

Below are 5 fics I've enjoyed this past week/recently.

shake the glitter off your clothes now by @rosyredlipstick

https://archiveofourown.org/works/23373892

Summary:

Nico has just woken up hungover in a strange Vegas hotel room missing 3 things: - His phone and wallet, apparently. - His dignity, lost somewhere on the strip. - Any clear memory of the night before explaining the aforementioned situation. However, he has gained a few things—mainly, the ring on his finger and the man in this bathtub. - "Fucking Vegas," Nico said, rubbing at his face.

--

No, I will not stop rec'ing Rosy's fics, what can I say. Also I just copy and paste this post every week and it satisfies my autistic brain to keep authors in the same place. Anyways! This is a short one-shot where Solangelo end up married in Vegas, it's incredible cute and I eat this trope up every time.

third drawer down by summerset

https://archiveofourown.org/works/43030752

Summary:

After the battle, Nico needs a tether to the earth so he doesn’t fade to nothingness. Will volunteers.

--

Loved this take on the "3 days in the infirmary" trope !! This is a little one-shot where Will glows and "tethers" Nico to the physical world and they have to cuddle and it's just adorable.

can't you see, i'm losing my mind this time? by rabbit_soup

https://archiveofourown.org/works/38765766

Summary:

“You’ve got micro-pieces of glass in your skin, and I can’t in my right mind let that stuff just fester in there.”

“Glass…? Where—?” He racked his brain, slowly glancing up at Will. He didn’t remember breaking any glass on the quest.

“Strangest thing,” Will said, pulling an orange container out of the box. On its side, it read Arm and Hammer, Baking Soda in thick white lettering. “Both Annabeth and Percy swung by a few minutes ago, talking about the exact same thing—glass in their hands! The both of ‘em! Isn’t that interesting?”

The glass beaches in Tartarus...Nico thought.

--

Me, rec'ing two "3 days in the infirmary" fics in one post? It's more likely than you think.

I've read this fic multiple times, and I love it more every time I read it. Nico is disabled and uses a cane, and Will has hearing aids. How the two of them dance around each other is lovely to read, and I'm a sucker for a good "will calms Nico down from a panic attack" fic and boy does this deliver. Also once again Nico and Will are autistic in this which makes me very happy !! Also it's a series and I love the hurt/comfort in the following one-shots after this fic.

The Legacy of Jason Grace by HPbooks4life

https://archiveofourown.org/works/47979301

Summary:

Nico felt it when Jason died.

The problem is, he can't STOP feeling it.

But maybe, with a little help from his friends, he can learn to feel it less.

--

Short one-shot character study on how Nico reacted to Jason's death and his journey with dealing with that grief. As someone struggling with grief myself I really resonated with this portrayal. This is definitely more of a Nico character study than a solangelo fic though fyi.

cradle my heart in the palm of your hand by ghosttotheparty

https://archiveofourown.org/works/45734695

Summary:

“I can keep you warm,” he whispers. “If you want.”

Nico’s lips curve into a small smile.

“Yes, please.”

or; Nico wants to be touched, is scared of it. But he’s not scared of Will.

--

Once again, I am in love with how ghosttotheparty writes intimacy, and I have re-read this one-shot multiple times. It just fills my heart with warmth when I read it tbh.

--

Okay that's all! I'll probably keep doing this until I run out of fics to recommend. Have a good friday lovelies!

[ddwcaph-game]

New MC-centered Sidequests!

All the sidequests so far are about helping the other characters, but what about a sidequest tailored to your MC's goals, motivations, and character development?

Yup, I'll be adding new sidequests depending on your MC's birthday wish (enneagram type)! I always felt the Enneagram Traits weren't doing much, but I didn't wanna include Personality Bonuses since that might not necessarily fit your character.

Below are the quest objectives for each type, but keep in mind that the requirements might change if I think of something better, and the values will most likely be adjusted later:

Type 1 (Role Model: "I want to fight bad guys and make the world a better place!")

Finish Main Quest without spending more than 5,000 Narrativium Points

Defeat at least 3 enemy bosses

Acquire a combined 9,000 Discipline, Honest, and Altruist Personality Points

Acquire a combined 3,000 Warm and Silly Personality Points

Type 2 (Caregiver: "I want to help and support everyone I can!")

Complete 15 Sidequests from other people

Acquire a total of at least 200 Relationship Hearts from everyone

Acquire a combined 3,000 Independent and Headstrong Personality Points

Type 3 (Achiever: "I want to be rich, famous, successful, and to make my mother proud!")

Reach Level 13 before my 13th birthday

Complete 30 Quests and Achievements

Acquire 1,500 Altruist Personality Points

Type 4 (Individualist: "I want to be the chosen one—and make my own special, unique mark on the world!")

Finish Main Quest and spend at least 10,000 Narrativium Points

Reach 10 Relationship Hearts with a Bestfriend OR Reach 500% Chemistry with a Mutual Crush

Acquire a combined 3,000 Warm and Sensible Personality Points

Type 5 (Investigator: "I want to discover, learn, and understand everything in the world!")

Succeed in 100 Stat Checks

Acquire 100 Knowledge Codex Entries OR Reach 100 Base Knowledge Stat

Acquire a combined 3,000 Outgoing and Reliant Personality Points

Type 6 (Guardian: "I want to feel safe and secure with my loyal friends and supportive family!")

Finish Main Quest without triggering my Plot Armor

Reach at least 8 Relationship Hearts with everyone in F6E (including Brandon/Beatrice)

Acquire at least 50,000 EXP from Overcoming Phobias OR Fully Discover 50 Secrets

Acquire 1,500 Warm Personality Points

Type 7 (Adventurer: "I want to have fun and go on adventures around the world!")

Collect 50 Trinkets & Collectibles

Acquire at least 150,000 EXP from Food & Exploration OR Spend 7,500 Narrativium Points

Acquire a combined 3,000 Sensible and Disciplined Personality Points

Type 8 (Champion: "I want to prove I'm the strongest and be the ruler of my own kingdom!")

Finish Main Quest, and defeat at least 100 enemies OR succeed in 20 Intimidation Checks

Become the leader of F6E

Spend 5,000 Narrativium Points OR Acquire 3,000 Headstrong Personality Points

Reach 1,500 Disciplined Personality Points

Type 9 (Mediator: "I want to have a quiet and peaceful happily ever after!")

Finish Main Quest with at least 9 Relationship Hearts with Twin

Resolve all family conflicts within F6E

Reach Close Friends OR Mutual Crush Status with Brandon/Beatrice

Acquire 1,500 Headstrong Personality Points

***

I want most of them to be achievable without going out of your way too much, but they're designed to not be completed until Volume 6. I also specifically made the last requirement sort of opposite of what you might expect to signify some sort of "character development".

For example, a Type 2 MC always wants to help people, so they might need to take more time for themself, hence the Independent/Headstrong Personality requirement.

Let me know what you think! 😊

[bg-brainrot]

WHaBFHtLA - Astarion x GN!Reader - Chapter 3: What it Means to Love

Pairing: Astarion x GN!Reader (Elf!Tav)

Genre: Reincarnation, Angst, Mystery, Slow burn

Rating: Explicit, 18+

Tags: Gender-Neutral Pronouns, POV Second Person, Canon-Typical Violence

WC: 2.9k words, 3/?? chapters

Summary: Now 29, you're still trying to piece together parts of your past. In particular, what exactly was your relationship with Astarion?

A/N: Spoilers for the Pale-Elf quest end, also an fyi that I didn’t want to just retell the quest, so it focuses a lot more on present-tav looking-in.

Ao3 | [Ch2][Ch4] | WHaBFHtLA Masterlist

Despite your best judgments, you’ve begun acting against your parent’s advice. They’ve told you on more than one occasion, learning too much of your previous lives can lead to heartbreak, to suffering. It can affect the course of your current life in ways that you won’t understand until it’s far too late.

You’d listened for a few good years, of course. But every time you enter a trance into one particular past life, you find yourself inexplicably drawn to it. The previous life in question is, of course, the one where you met Astarion, the silver-haired vampire. So you caved and did what you find easiest in this life: cracked open a book.

General information was surprisingly easy to come by, as you were apparently incredibly famous– saved-the-realm famous.

After finding this out, you’ve taken to calling this life the Hero’s life. You had, allegedly, saved the city of Baldur’s Gate almost two and a half centuries ago, alongside the companions that appear in your memories. Even Astarion, with his snark and sass, seemed to be part of the credited heroes.

As for the vampire in question, that man wouldn’t leave your waking or trancing thoughts, no matter how hard you tried. You’re not sure if you find his persistent appearances annoying or endearing at this point. 

You’ve learned a lot about him over the years. Useless facts, like his favorite poetry, his love of embroidery, his preferred wine. One night you spend all four hours of your reverie quietly sitting next to him, tending to your weapons. Every once in a while you’ll think, Surely, there can’t be any more memories with this man? But somehow he will always appear to you again a few nights later.

What bothers you is that so many of them are aimless and mundane, joking, traveling, sitting together. They aren’t helpful, which frustrates you endlessly. The point of your reveries is to help you live your new life, and you’re simply not seeing how these fit in. They certainly feel out of place given the other things you’ve learned of that particular life– the dangers that seemed to lurk behind every corner, the constant feeling of a life on the edge of death. 

You also find that, no matter how many times you meet him, spend time with him, you are never certain: were you in love?

It’s a question you aren’t really equipped to answer. You don't suppose you've ever been in love before, and at 29 years of age, it seems a bit too early in your long-lived life to bother. What you do know is that second memory in the woods, it was not love. 

It all feels so ludicrously fake until a few moments begin to change your mind. Once, he cries your name, charging into combat to save you. Another night, he quietly holds your hand, surrounded by a world shrouded in shadow. A separate encounter, you expect things to escalate to another desperate attempt to get lost in each other, but instead you lay down together, entering your reveries side-by-side. After these moments, the memories feel like they take a turn: all lingering looks, soft touches and, above all else, real, genuine conversations.

After a while, you’d learned of his time as a vampire spawn under a cruel master. You’d learned of his scars, his family, and his hopes and desires. Seeing the man behind the smile felt like a sucker punch to the gut, to both you and your past-self.

For your past-self’s part, you see them open up around him– certainly more than they have in any other memories. As a result, you learn more about them than ever. They tell him their worries: about facing an incredible evil, about not making it out of the whole ordeal alive. They’re a relatively young elf, they still have so much life ahead of them, and apparently this is all being ruined by a worm in their brain.

As if they didn’t have enough to worry about with that looming over them, each of their companions seems to have their own troubles that seemed to need your attention. You only live their life a few hours every week, and you can’t imagine bearing the burdens that they do– it’s clear that you possessed a strength you can only dream of now. They seem willing to make any number of sacrifices for these people and it makes you feel strikingly inadequate, easily overshadowed by their spirit. If I’d lived through their hardships, you think. Would I be this strong?

After a time, your trances surrounding Astarion turn to more concerning subjects– of devils and profane rituals, of the truth behind the machinations of Astarion’s master, Cazador. Gods, you hate Cazador. Everything you’d learned of that man made you want to meet him and give him his comeuppance. You hope at the very least that your past-self ensured he died without mercy, that the man’s wicked life finally caught up to him.

Tonight, you get your wish.

When your eyes open in your former self’s body, the first thing you notice is Astarion. The pale elf is ahead of you, his back turned, hands clenched in fists at his sides.

The second thing you notice is the amount of worry you feel. Your past-self seems frozen in place with it, and you can feel your body barely resisting the call to jump into action. Not sure what you’re witnessing, you wonder if you’ve stumbled into a lover’s quarrel.

Then you hear his voice. “Do not slouch before me, boy! Have you no respect for yourself?”

You’re certain that the instinctual rage you feel at that voice is something that defies lifetimes. Your past-self is brimming with it, their blood pumping in their ears as they watch the scene unfold before them.

Distantly you register him goading Astarion, Astarion responding with a fury matching your own. Despite the anger burning in both of your bodies, through your very soul, you can’t help but look at the man and balk. Wait, is that him? you think. That’s Cazador? He looks pathetic.

He looks like nothing more than a sniveling aristocrat, a dime a dozen in large cities like Neverwinter. You wish you could take control of your memories and tell him as such. Perhaps you’d spoil his outfit and sneer at him or ruin his standing among the rest of the nobility. More permanently, you’d like you just rain sunlight on him and watch him burn. Unfortunately, you’re only along for the journey, so you watch as your past-self and Astarion confront the man.

“A pity you amounted to so little, despite my efforts,” the man says, his words harsh, his tone belittling. It reminds you of one of your old Evocation teachers. He’d act mighty, tell you all that he’d done for you, then leave you to the wolves come examinations. That man ended up blown to bits in a miscast spell, and you hope you’re about to see a similar fate befall this vampire.

You’re in the midst of your musings when the pale elf recaptures your attention. Astarion’s response is passionate, holding the unfettered hatred of two centuries of torment, “NO. No. Fuck you. And fuck everything you’ve ever done to me!”

The words snap you out of your own thoughts, forcing you to focus on the scene before you. This isn’t for your enjoyment, and the villain isn't here to give you failing marks. Cazador is far crueler than any man you’ve met in your entire waking existence and this is a life or death situation. You suddenly feel so small in the middle of this, woefully out of your depth.

Your past-self is more than prepared for the situation though. They say that you’ll make the man pay, and their voice is colored with a righteous fury that you can only feel second-hand. Your own anger seems petty in comparison.

“I will not speak to cattle. This is between me and the boy.” Cazador sneers as he dismisses your words.

“You son of a bitch!”

Then Astarion is charging at him, your arm is outstretched as if to stop him, but he’s long gone and your fingers grasp at nothing. Dread fills you as you see Cazador stop him in his tracks, a glowing red magic emanates from his staff.

Cazador spits more venomous words at Astarion, all the while bathed in the red glow of the ancient ritual. You can feel your body straining against every impulse to rush forward and attack the vampire lord where he stands. But they hold back, and you can sense that it comes out of concern for Astarion– an odd reasoning in your mind. Surely Astarion would want you to focus on killing Cazador. 

Before your past-self decides on a course of action, Astarion is being flung, tossed like a ragdoll across the cavernous room that Cazador calls his lair. You watch, helpless, as magic envelopes him, stripping him down to be a mere component for the ritual.

“No! Stop him! Get me out of this!” you hear Astarion shout.

He’s about as far away from you as the ritual circle will allow, trapped by a flick of a madman’s wrist. So you’re surprised to feel a calmness come over you as your past-self assesses the situation. You’re not privy to their thoughts or considerations, but, having seen so much of their past now, you’re reassured that they will get out of this alive and well. Hopefully with Astarion in tow.

Cazador either doesn’t care about your calm confidence or is simply too self-absorbed to notice. He raises his arms in triumph before beginning the profane ritual, “Witness the birth of the Vampire Ascendent! Ecce dominus!”

All hells break loose as the pact magic of Mephistopheles binds each of Cazador’s sacrifices to sigils on the floor. Several creatures of the night come forth, ready to do the vampire lord’s bidding. Werewolves bear their teeth at you, bats fly up onto the platform, and ghouls flank Cazador on either side. It’s a frightening sight to you, and unlike anything else you’ve witnessed in your memories or life. For once, you’re glad you’re not in control, because you’re not certain your legs would be willing to move.

Defying all logic, the first thing your past-self does is run for Astarion. Past each and every one of these creatures, past Cazador himself– they sprint like there’s no one else in the entire world. Perhaps to them there isn’t. Because you feel it now. You feel adrenaline, panic, fear, but, smothering all the rest with its strength, is pure love.

You hadn’t known what it might feel like, but now that it hits you like a wild Bulette, you can recognize it clearly. It had been there in those small moments, an underlying feeling that never quite reached the surface. Looking back, it’s almost as if your past-self had been trying to stifle it, an unruly bud of emotion that couldn’t be trusted in their fight for survival. Here, faced with the possibility of losing Astarion, there was no use in trying to hold back the flood. And there is no possibility of them leaving this place without him.

“Astarion!” they call out once they reach him. He’s bound by those same red bindings that Cazador used earlier, floating above you.

“Help me!” he cries, and the desperation in his voice is piercing. Your eyes look back and forth, inspecting his restraints in seconds, before you simply grab him and pull. 

It’s not the most elegant solution, but it certainly is effective. Astarion falls atop you, and you distantly hear Cazador’s angry shouts. It hardly matters to you now. “Are you alright?” you hear yourself ask him, relief and concern fighting for precedence.

“I’m fine, thanks to you,” he says, lifting himself off the ground. He looks at you, red eyes filled with determination, and your relief wins out. “Let’s go stab that bastard.”

The rest of your reverie is spent in grueling combat. You feel your past-self fight to their limits, fueled by equal parts anger and love. You’ve learned plenty from them in terms of how to fight and what a real fight feels like. But this? This was revenge. It was messy, it was brutal, and it filled you with an odd sense of awe.

After Astarion deals Cazador a near-lethal blow, you think to yourself, thank the gods, it’s over. You reverie didn’t end though, because it was anything but over. Cazador hid into his damnable coffin, Astarion followed, and you watched.

Watched as Astarion tore Cazador out of hiding, threatened him with his own blade, taunted him with his own ritual. Watched as your past-self pleaded with him, tried to assure him that he didn’t need to sacrifice anything to be worthy. Watched as Astarion tried to convince you that this was necessary to be truly free of Cazador.

You could feel your past-self’s emotions, tumultuous as they are, settle on understanding. You don’t understand– how could you, ill-equipped as you are– but you’re glad that they do. They reason with him, try to persuade him to give up on the ritual as only they know how. 

Both of you breathe a sigh of relief as he says, “You… you’re right. I can be better than him. But I'm not above enjoying this.”

Then a torrent of emotions you hadn’t realized were being held back finally burst through the dam. As Astarion stabbed Cazador, delivering blow after blow, you felt sorrow, comfort, joy, sympathy… pain. The pale elf cries, knelt before his former master, your former-self weeps with him.

You wake up in tears. You’d been looking forward to Cazador’s demise, but something about it leaves you feeling hollow. You’re exhausted by how utterly out of your depth you had been. It was every bit of your energy to hold on to the memory and bear it witness, all you could do to try to comprehend the hurt that Astarion felt.

Despite being out of your reverie, a deep pain in your chest remains. You’re not sure you’ve ever felt this before, but you’re nearly certain that this is what heartbreak feels like. It’s almost as if his pain was your pain. Seeing him break down like that was akin to you breaking down, and even now, the tears keep spilling.

You don’t like to admit when you’re wrong, and you’d like to believe that that happens rarely enough that it doesn’t matter. However when it comes to this man, you might need to admit that you didn’t always have enough context to make judgements.

Now that you do, you understand your past-self more than you expect. They were willing to sacrifice anything for him, put their life on the line for him. Something about Astarion makes your heart race, your mind spin, and your very soul weep. What it is about him hardly matters, what matters is that your past-self is trying to push you toward him and for the first time, you think you’d like to listen.

You’d like to begin even more extensive research. This time not about who you were, but about what happened after the events at Baldur’s Gate– More importantly, what became of Astarion after this. You’re too far from Baldur’s Gate to properly investigate or understand what’s mere myth or actual history, however you do know that, as a vampire, he wouldn’t die of natural causes. You’ve yet to dream of his death, so he could very well still be alive.

I should at the very least find out what happened to him, you think. Another, more sensible side of you thinks, Wait. You don’t even know how this life ended. Things could have ended poorly between you, he may even have killed you himself.

Even if you did find him, even if he did love your past-self, you also know that it’s not you who he knows or would care to see. Despite all of that logic, a dangerous, near-taboo thought comes to you, Should I just go find him?

You’re still young though and you understand that this is likely a foolhardy idea– that the exact thing that your parents have warned you against is happening right now. So you decide to consult with them before you make any decisions.

They indulge you a bit, willing to help you with some research, encouraging you to maybe even write a letter if you find the right words. However, they come with a clear warning: no good will come of it if you meet with anyone from a former life. You’re not the same person. It’s been decades, maybe centuries since they’ve last seen you, and they may not be the same person they once were. Don’t ruin your current life by chasing a previous one. Don’t go to Baldur’s Gate.

You nod, figuring that they’re correct. They have centuries of experience, seen countless elves go through what you’re going through. This is only sound, mature advice. That advice carries you for quite a while, staying your hand when you go to practice a divination spell or when you think to seek a teleportation circle to Baldur’s Gate.

However, after decades and decades of dreaming of this man, you find your will wavering, crumbling into dust. One reverie in your 99th year of life finally breaks through the last of your resistance.

[satureja13]

Ji Ho has the deeper connection to the Bond. The craving and the urge to charge the Bond is stronger than Vlad's, so of course he felt Vlad approaching and he eagerly waited for him. It's painful for both of them (but more painful for Vlad, because the Bond hates him ^^') when the Bond is raging and Vlad feels bad because he hadn't been more aware. He hates to hurt Ji Ho. But these are thoughts for later. Now they only needed each other to touch, hold... And when Vlad pulled Ji Ho close and his breath ghosted over his neck before his lips tasted him, Ji Ho was in bliss. Has Vlad changed his mind and will they finally start a physical relationship so he could become more comfortable around Vlad? Saiwa and Jack watched them in awe.

Until... Jack sensed it first, Vlad was about to bite Ji Ho! They already overstretched the Bond too far and Vlad wasn't himself anymore! Vlad once died because of Ji Ho's poisonous blood so they have to be careful even though their Bond now protects Vlad from the poison. But we also know how fickle and vengeful the Bond can be... Jack: "Vlad stop it! You can't bite Ji Ho!" Ji Ho was shocked. Vlad wasn't about to kiss him. He wanted to bite him. Because he lost control - again. (Ji Ho looks so hurt, it's breaking my heart 😭)

Ji Ho left to care for Kiyoshi and Jeb, glad to escape this awkward and painful situation.

And the others went inside and tried to calm down so they could discuss Vlad's adventures in the Therapy Game. How annoyed Yang Mal looks! And Jack is smiling even though he's so upset because they are making baby steps forward :3 Even if it doesn't look like it. And so Vlad told them how beautiful the world was, about it's horse-eating inhabitants...

...and the threats (he means NPC Leander lol). Saiwa: "This is better than expected! The feelings, even if painful, stay in the game and don't affect us when we log out. We can explore our therapy in our own pace and if it's too hard, we can just leave. And Tiny can even managed to adress all your problematic behaviors and made them quests and offered solutions! That's just amazing!" Vlad: "What problematic behaviors are you even talking about? I wasn't there for a therapy -I was just playtesting so you can safely get your therapy!" Saiwa: "What problematic behaviors? I don't even know where to begin! Your foolish pride, your bad temper, your silly attitudes... and you're still unable to forgive Leander after all he'd done for us because you're jealous!" Vlad: "He touched Ji Ho!" Saiwa: "And what about you? You just tried to bite him! That's far worse! Ji Ho trusts you and does anything to learn how to love you and you only think of your own needs and you're unable to keep ypur teeth to yourself!"

Jack: "Boys. All we need to know is that the Game is safe and it'll help us. Because we all (!) clearly need help. I will go back." Saiwa: "No!" Jack: "Who will then? Vlad?" Vlad "No way! I've seen enough!" Jack: "Saiwa needs to supervise the computer and Tiny Can. We should wait before we send Ji Ho to not open the Pandor's Box and let out all his surpressed feelings at once. So I'm the only one left. I can do this. 'Cause I'm the Super Soldier after all!" The Super Soldier looks like he already has a clear vision of his mission ^^'

Ji Ho is on his way back home. To care for Jeb and Kiyoshi. Lost in thoughts. Yes, he knows Vlad loves him. But how deep is this love when Vlad has no control? He knows how afraid Ji Ho is of him. And again Ji Ho pondered about if Morgan was right. That Vlad was under a spell and his love for him wasn't real. Ji Ho had been so worried when Vlad was ingame, after what had happened to Jack. And Vlad's only concern is to sink his teeth in his neck. Tch. (But Ji Ho's neck still tingles where Vlad pressed his lips against his heated skin...) Vlad and the Bond are the only stable things in his life. The only things no one can take from him. He's not able to love Vlad (yet) but he tries and he can't loose him. Ji Ho is also determined to make this therapy a success - as soon as they let him.

Little Goat: 'Aww I really hoped he would kiss him!' Other Little Goat: 'Ikr! Nonetheless - it was so hot when he grabbed him omg!' First Little Goat: 'Let's visit Tiny Can and talk about some BL plot ideas for the Therapy Game!' (One of their anchestors must have been a Satyr or something ^^')

Plus: When I logged in, it was still raining. But when Vlad came near Ji Ho, it stopped! (Like last time!)

'I know your eyes in the morning sun I feel you touch me in the pouring rain And the moment that you wander far from me I wanna feel you in my arms again And you come to me on a summer breeze Keep me warm in your love, then you softly leave And it's me you need to show

How deep is your love? I really mean to learn 'Cause we're living in a world of fools Breaking us down when they all should let us be We belong to you and me'

How Deep Is Your Love - Bee Gees

From the Beginning  ~  Underwater Love ~  Latest 🕹️ 'Therapy Game' from the beginning ▶️ here 📚 Previous Chapters: Chapters: 1-6 ~ 7-12 ~ 13-16 ~ 17-22 ~ 23-28

[bagheerita]

finally finished DS9 and decided to post some thoughts in one big blob

I was honestly about to give up on season 7 and put the rest of this show to the side for a few months, but then Ezri and Worf have a 3 episode arc sorting out their relationship, only talking to each other because they're marooned/imprisoned, and I was so charmed by them being loud and messy that I managed to bull my way through to the end. I love the two of them as friends, they are adorable. 

I actually really like Damar and his arc, and it’s pretty rare I say that about a character who killed my favorite. 

I feel like the reason Section 31 exists, and they keep forcing episodes about it upon me, is because they wrote themselves into a corner with inventing the changeling disease to kneecap an unbeatable enemy and didn’t know how else to fix it/end the war except with secret secret spies. 

Ezri has this whole speech she gives to Worf about dismantling structures of power and I feel like they needed to end the show before anyone was like, hey the Federation kind of sucks and we should definitely do that. 

Garak’s mom showed up and everything was good in the world again.

Ezri and Julian are like “can’t deny the chemistry.” lol babes that's called being a young attractive allosexual. "Chemistry" is what Worf and O'Brien have in all the scenes where they're mocking you.

I’ve never felt the truth of the phrase “I support women’s wrongs” so intensely as I do with Kai Winn. I love her and I want to give her everything. I didn't love her getting assaulted by Dukat, but when she knows everything that's happening and chooses the pah-wraiths anyway, yes fuck it up. When she poisoned Dukat I was like, hot damn if this character dies as a footnote in someone else's quest for power I will forgive everything that this show has put me through because of him. But we can't have nice things. I did like that her last act was to choose to take their victory from them, and give Sisko the clue he needed to beat them.

I do love Martok but I feel like he’s going to be about as good a chancellor as Robert Baratheon was a king. 

Odo is The Last Unicorn, but with brain-melding: he’s going to share his experience of loving a mortal with the other immortals. I still don’t “get” him and Kira as a couple, their relationship literally went from -20 to 100% after a single all night conversation locked in Jadzia's bathroom and no actual onscreen development, but at least I believe that they believe they’re in love. 

Why the ever loving fuck is Julian so obsessed with the Alamo. Every time they bring it up I want to grab him and Miles and shake them. I get that it's supposed to be some sort of metaphor for fighting a hopeless war, but really? You want to go up to the fake room where you can do/be literally anything and you're going to repeatedly reenact a battle where you die to defend your right to have slaves and practice settler colonialism??? Even in the last episode they’ve won the real war and they’re still obsessed with reenacting this old battle. They also spend that one episode trying to figure out how to win the Alamo… babes, that actually happened: it’s called the Battle of San Jacinto- learn some actual fucking history, your side won the war. This isn’t about metaphors anymore, the metaphor has failed, now Julian just has a neurosis.

The Dominion War plot line goes on for way too long and there is so little internal emotional catharsis. (Maybe because for me the things that were supposed to be cathartic just induced more rage? 🤔) The ending was fine as far as character wrap ups but felt pretty rushed considering how long it took us to get to this point, and I really think they needed more time to handle the denouement. The overall pacing of the episodes/seasons is terrible: you wasted like a season and a half puttering around, with whole episodes where you forgot to mention the war; you added in mirror-verse episodes without bothering to use them for story or character development; Quark is one of my favorite characters but there are too many episodes about Ferengi shenanigans that do not impact the actual plot; there are whole scenes and arcs dedicated to a character who does not (within the internal logic of the show) exist. And then you slammed all the development into the last half of the last season. I'm not surprised now that I forgot this entire show after watching it while airing because it’s emotionally exhausting. I've compared DS9 to SGA in the past, but the Dominion remind me of the Ori: You've killed the enjoyment I found in this show and have made it a chore to watch.

I do like that what ends the war is Julian’s determination and Odo’s compassion. You've proven the Founders wrong, but this entire plot thread was so poorly handled that I don't know that anyone remembers one mention from four seasons ago about why this war even started and, honestly, standing on a planet where you just murdered millions of children it's kind of not enough. I like that they let Garak kill the last Weyoun, and I adore the scene where he lets Kira take the phaser, but honestly he deserved more. It wouldn't solve anything, and I think there's a nice parallel in Garak's fears inspiring him into attempting genocide being incredible grounded in reality and the Founder's similar fears being negated, but he deserves it, the head Founder deserves to be torn into tiny pieces by grieving Cardassians, and I deserve to watch it. (I also desperately want Garak to find out about Section 31 and the changeling disease just so he can be like, "Oh so when I try to commit genocide I get 6 months in jail, but when the Federation wants to commit genocide that's okay?")

I don’t know who on the production team is so invested in Mark Alaimo getting a paycheck, but by the end Dukat as a character has long outlived any interesting qualities he may have had at one point. The final battle shit with the pah-wraiths was pretty underwhelming; except for the deeper exploration of Winn's motives that this season has allowed for, "The Reckoning" was such a better structured episode. (At least at this point they've let Kira go off and be awesome without being forced into episodes with Dukat. The sheer amount of abusive old men sexually attracted to much younger women in this show is frankly unnecessary; I will never be able to unhear Curzon say he flunked Jadzia from the symbiont program because he wanted to bang her, and Dukat’s relentless pursuit of Kira especially/even after we learn he sexually assaulted her mother is disgusting.) 

I have mixed feelings about Sisko, and his character having a “white savior” role with the Bajorans. Like, I guess it’s a cool twist that he’s a black white savior, maybe that's the best the 90s can do, but also can we decide to not write stories where we give foreigners positions of power over recently subjugated peoples??  I was feeling pretty yikes about it especially after the beginning of this season and learning that he was basically genetically bred by the Prophets for the position, but… I dunno, I’m probably not someone who can or should have a deep opinion about this. I do like that arc for him as a character outside of what it means for the Bajorans, but his ending feels too open. I wish we got to know more about what he learns from hanging out with the Prophets, and I wish that the great "sorrow" he suffers from disregarding the visions felt more concrete. Kassidy is really the only one sad about this, Sisko seems excited to exist outside of time. (And I feel like a lot of the "yikes" of the character could have been fixed by making the character be Bajoran? You wouldn't need to invent a reason why he was chosen by the Prophets. He could even have been raised on Earth and still have those ties, and I think it would have made the pull between his duty as an officer and his duty as the Emissary more interesting. Also can you imagine if Jake and Ziyal were both half Bajoran and hanging out with each other??? But they don't pay me to write shows.)

Why do Miles and Julian have the gayest final montage? It's literally the first of the montages and they start it up over "The Way You Look Tonight" and I was just like... wtf did I accidentally put in a fan video? Miles is the only person in a relationship who has a montage without any mention of their significant other, though I guess Worf's does jump from his first meeting with Sisko straight to season 5 clips so they didn't mention Jadzia either. I love that Miles and Julian have such a deep friendship, and I feel like this show could use more interrogation of the concept of love and the fact that platonic love/friendship is just as important as romantic love, but the production has spent so much time "no homo"ing every relationship they can think of that it just comes off as bizarre. 

All the bts things I’ve read about this show pretty much amount to the production being like “we had no idea what we were doing with this character” which, when combined with the failure to manage season structure and some of the utterly bonkers episodes this show threw out there, leads me to believe that pretty much anything I enjoyed about this show comes from the actors. This is definitely a show I feel like I’m going to be “rewatching” through fanfiction and gif sets before I ever rewatch the entire show again. 

[alwayschasingrainbows]

I am a bit shy to post this poll, but also, very curious about your opinion, so here we go.

After reading the Finnish sequel to Emily of New Moon series, and comparing it to the later Anne books, another question came to my mind:

(the "Emilia Kent - Runotytön tarina jatkuu" by Satu Koskimies and Vilja-Tuulia Huotarinen spoilers under the cut - as well as the origins of this question and my own opinion):

Thank you all for voting!!! I really appreciate each one of your answers ❤.

The origins of the question (and spoilers of a Finnish sequel!) under the cut:

SPOILERS for Emily's sequel (my opinion is beneath the summary):

It was a quite important issue in the Finnish sequel. Emily was very apprehensive when it came to an eventual motherhood. It was stated multiple times that she had no maternal instinct whatsover (very Rilla-like). She didn't want to sacrifice her writing - and she felt that she would have to, if she had children. One of the things she was dealing with in this sequel was writer's block - she found it very difficult to write. Thankfully, she overcame the issue and wrote another novel, at the end of the story. Emily was not exactly against having children (more like, resigned "If they come, there is nothing to be done"), but she certainly was not excited about the idea, unlike Anne.

Emily went as far as telling an annoying reporter that she and her husband were NOT going to have any children. Teddy, on the other hand, was described as wanting a family (which, for a short time, was a bit of a sore issue between them).

Emilia Kent - Runotytön tarina jatkuu takes place during the first two (?) years of Emily and Teddy's marriage. They don't have any children during this time - yet the narrative suggests that Emily is pregnant during the last two chapters (nothing is said straight-forwardly, though).

END OF THE SPOILERS for Emily's sequel.

My opinion:

I personaly have trouble picturing these two as parents. They seem far too invested into their work to find time for their eventual children.

On the other hand, LMM herself wanted children - and it was quite difficult to prevent pregnancy at these times (not impossible, of course, but difficult). Usually, marriage meant having children.

Also... Rilla, who did not like babies, couldn't help loving little Jims. We learn from "The Blythes Are Quoted" that she and Ken had, indeed, become parents to young Gilbert Ford.

Rilla's maturation is partly described via taking care of her war baby - as if to say that even people who seemingly had no parental instinct, could grow to love a child (it is not exactly true in a real world, but LMM seems to use this trope rather often; Aunt Elizabeth with Juliet and Emily, Marilla with Anne and the twins, Andrew Stuart with Jane, etc).

Also, this paragraph from Emily's Quest suggests that Emily might have wanted children at the end of the story:

"Daff," she said, "there is an old fireplace in that house—with the ashes of a dead fire in it—a fireplace where pussies should bask and children dream. And that will never happen now, Daff, for Mabel Geordie doesn't like open fireplaces—dirty, dusty things—a Quebec heater is so much warmer and more economical."

Emily's dreams are connected to the Disappointed House - I always felt that she talked about her feelings there - but that is very far-stretched and the only thing that might suggest something.

So, if I were to answer my own question: I would probably say: either none, either 1 or 2. I definitely don't see her as having a big family.

I am very curious about your thoughts!!!! Sorry for the long post.

[cvrsedslytherin]

All My Woes || Sebastian Sallow

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You can click here for the summary, cover page/etc. This is where I will post the links to the chapters!

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Chapter One — Meeting you ignited a fire

Sebastian Sallow didn’t think he’d end up in London, working for Gringotts Wizarding Bank as a curse-breaker. Though it partly made sense— curses seemed to be part of his life and another storm was heading for him that he wouldn’t be aware of, for a while. After everything that happened previously when he was a teenager at Hogwarts; the events with his Uncle Solomon and his twin sister, Anne; he was just thankful he wasn’t rotting in a cell in Azkaban. Still, he hadn’t expected to end up here specifically. After graduation, he didn’t even know what he’d do anymore. He felt somewhat disheartened with life. There was guilt, sadness, etc, still plaguing his mind but he carried himself strongly. He didn’t pick London because he knew Anne was secretly living somewhere there. He lived in the country still— being in London was just for work. He gave Anne the space she wanted and it’s taking years to be forgiven but he’s happy he gets updates now. Even gets a letter from her once in a while. Anne and his best friend, Ominis Gaunt along with his other close friend, Alexander Thorne (who had tried to help him in his dangerous quest for finding Anne’s cure for her curse in their fifth year of Hogwarts) are happy that he hasn’t lost himself to a dark path completely and fought the allure of dark magic. Proud that he finished school and was able to get this job. Nobody but the four of them knew he ended up killing his uncle at the end of fifth year in a heated moment of desperation.

It wasn’t the right thing to do but he was a kid, trying to carry so much on his own. With no guidance from adults… (the twins had lost their parents early), he made a grave mistake. Turning him in just didn’t seem correct also. It was such a complicated situation.

So here he is— standing at 20 years old and a year of experience at curse-breaking. Today he was finding out who his partner was going to be. Apparently, it was someone who wasn’t from the United Kingdom; a foreigner who had lived in America for a while. That’s all he knew. Sebastian hadn’t paid much attention because all he cared about was his research and tasks. He was quite a rising star among the field, he excelled in his work. Plus he didn’t have much interest in other people.

Back at Hogwarts, a lot found him charming; he had the confidence and sassiness. Wasn’t afraid of anything. He was fun; a skilled duelist and a bookworm. But he was too focused on helping Anne that he stayed close to only his two best friends. Alexander Thorne had been a transfer student with a rare magical ability to which Sebastian hoped would help Anne but the friendship was genuine. Both boys helped each other with their quests. For a while, Alex gave both him & Anne a slight distraction for being someone new and unique. It’s a shame things went south but they remained friends. Alex was off exploring the world to learn even more about ancient magic that hadn’t been uncovered. Plus he also tries finding ways to attempt helping Anne with her curse. He actually managed to learn to ease a smidge of the pain for her at times, without any repercussions. He visits Sebastian every time he’s back here too. Sebastian was grateful for the friendship. Alex was also the reason Ominis didn’t turn Sebastian in and their friendship remained in tact too.

That was the gist of Sebastian’s life; he hadn’t gotten close to any others. At work, a lot kept their distance but a lot of women did ogle him. Sebastian had definitely grown to be manly as expected. He had kept his hair the same, the slight swoop of messy yet somehow neatly kept brown hair. The freckles that were painted like stars on his face still a major charming point. But instead of being a boy, he was a man now. He was built pretty well even during his Hogwarts days. He could have been a beater for the quidditch team but he undoubtedly developed more and more over the years. He was tall, bulky but fit— he certainly had the muscles. Utterly and devastatingly handsome was Sebastian Sallow so of course, he had eyes on him. A few witches might have tried to flirt with him a bit but to no avail. He simply did not care.

So when he went to his boss’s office to be introduced to his partner… he damn well wasn’t expecting to be stunned. Nothing could have prepared him for the beauty in front of his eyes but it wasn’t only the way she looked; it was a sudden feeling in the air. As if a part of his soul just ignited in flames but it wasn’t a bad feeling. In fact, it was a pleasant feeling but one that shocked him as he felt caught off-guard.

When their eyes met, she felt familiar and the same could be said for her, he felt familiar. It was as if, right off the bat— they knew the other was different and that maybe they would get along quite well.

Another thing however, he wondered how this small beauty was a curse-breaker of all things. She looked so delicate… it gave him a weird feeling. A feeling of slight protectiveness? Not that he judged; he was sure she was capable but he was just blown away at the same time and couldn’t help those other feelings about it.

She had to be only five feet tall; there was no way she was any taller. Her body was petite, slim— she was lithe and it looked like something or someone could break her with just a hug alone. Despite being small, her height made the weight balance out a bit; she wasn’t exactly curvy (although she seemed to have quite a big bottom for someone tiny). Her chest was small but there; perky but she did have a womanly aura. After all, humans come in all shapes and sizes. It could be with the way she stood with her head up high despite a slight shyness there. There was an elegance to her as well.

It was also those amber orbs of hers; gleaming in the light as if they were gold. Those eyes were quite hauntingly beautiful to Sebastian because they seemed to hold the story of a thousand words.

Long & straight, dark brown hair that almost reached to her lower back. She had adorable full lips, naturally long eye lashes and not freckles like Sebastian’s but just a few at random spots on both sides of her face. They were quite light so someone would have to be close up to see and they weren’t so noticeable upon front view. Skin was like snow; so smooth & pale— the best way to describe her would be a porcelain doll.

The looks of a porcelain doll, indeed.

Both of them had dressed professionally; she wore a long black skirt with a white, button up blouse, long sleeved & paired with an elegant belt in the middle. Almost making it look like the two pieces of clothing connected. She wore brown penny loafers. Sebastian matched her a little; having a white, button up shirt that also was long sleeved but with a black tie along with brown trousers and black boots. They seemed to have similar colors.

“Sallow, this is your new partner, Pierce. She comes from America, starting at Ilvermorny’s school but finished up her education at Durmstrang,” said his boss, Viktor Hawthorne, in his usual gruff tone of voice.

Sebastian blinked, surprised yet again, ‘finished at Durmstrang?! Ilvermorny… I can see but Durmstrang?’ Now he wondered what the story was because clearly, there was one there and he wondered how she ended up at that school and just who was this young woman exactly?

“Sallow?” His boss asked when he failed to respond. Sebastian almost went flush at that and cleared his throat, “apologies.”

He turned to her, extending a hand as he approached closer. He realized he towered over her; it made him gulp but he was able to reply confidently in a low tone, “I’m Sebastian Sallow, pleasure to meet you.”

The voice that came out of her didn’t fully match her appearance. While it was certainly feminine and alluring, it was a lower tone than he expected. That voice was nice to listen to, “I’m Lilith Pierce, nice meeting you too. Hope we get along; I’m quite the hard worker and I’m pretty serious about it.” The American accent came out but there was a hint of something else in there. He knew she had to be European of some kind.

And her personality came out; he got a sense of her type as she added that in. That was the maturity he felt. She seemed to be able to find her voice and speak out. He almost wanted to smirk; he found her interesting already.

It’s been a long time since he felt an interest in someone.

Like the fire that was lost in him was about to be found again.

Ignited.

By her.

(Technically, it already ignited at first glance.)

When she reached out to shake his extended hand, he felt a minor jolt of electricity run through his body. Her hand was so small and soft, as expected. His large and slightly calloused hand engulfed hers.

Lilith secretly gulped when feeling his hand; she could tell he was strong. And oddly, it all felt nice.

Upon further inspection, he noticed a cute feature. She didn’t have slender fingers as one might think because of how slim she was overall. No. She had short, just slightly chubby fingers.

They shook hands. Both lost in little thoughts for a second.

“Right… I think we’ll get on just fine actually. I care about my work too.” Sebastian stated in an assuring voice but with a hint of cheekiness. “You’re not the only one, Pierce. Don’t worry.”

She nodded and gave a small smile to that.

‘Ah, so she’s not too stern? I wonder what a real smile looks on her… a wide one.’ Sebastian is going to have so many thoughts as he realized he’s noticing every detail of her.

He finally let go of her hand when he realized it had been too long. He actually didn’t want to let go and barely understood why he kept wanting to hold onto her hand. If she noticed, she hid it well. There was a slight unreadable side to her.

Viktor replied before she could, “I do give him that. Mr. Sallow is quite a rising star here… I can’t think of a better partner for you. Although he may not always have the most… obedience for rules— he is a great curse-breaker so far. He went far in training. I think you two can learn from each other. She is quite skilled too; her teachers spoke highly of her.”

Lilith listened to it all and nodded, “glad to hear it about him and thank you, sir. I’m not that amazingly skilled though. I’m just doing my best. I try to put effort is all.”

‘… Humble & modest. So maybe not as confident as she wanted me to think,’ Sebastian thought then responded with a slight smile of his own, “I’m sure you’ll be a fine partner. Don’t sell yourself short. You made it here for a reason, yeah?”

That perked her up a bit.

Viktor had a tiny smirk because he was used to Sebastian not caring much about anyone but he seems to take a shine to Lilith. It’s been a long time since anyone has seen a genuine smile on his face, even if it wasn’t a huge one. He let out a chuckle, “see? Even Sallow agrees. Must see a potential within you already and I rarely see him react like that.”

Sebastian’s face did turn slightly red and for some reason, he felt like a schoolboy for a moment. Lilith cleared her throat; a ghost of a smile still lingering there but she also suddenly felt a little embarrassed too.

Viktor got up and patted Sebastian’s back, “I’ll shut up now. Please show Lilith around today, help her get settled.

Then Viktor turned to Lilith, “I know you’re new to this country overall so I hope you can settle in. As for this job, you will be traveling a lot anyways so you won’t be here too much but I still want you to get acquainted to the place. It’s the base after all.”

“Thank you, sir. I’m sure I’ll get used to it quickly and of course.“

Politeness came out of her so much and Viktor definitely appreciated it though secretly thought that she needs to be a little less polite. Sebastian was thinking the same.

‘How did she manage at Durmstrang?’ But he knows… there can be more to someone than meets the eye and her eyes… gave him a multitude of feelings he couldn’t describe.

She was a subtle mystery.

One he couldn’t wait to solve…

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CHAPTER TWO LINK

[c6jpg]

dainsleif quest

the lore drops. fucking impeccable. but also i feel edged the fuck on. like we learned a liiiiiiiitle but also get 10 thousand unanswered questions as well

that's pretty standard for dainsleif quests though ig

the quest itself. can we even call that a quest it was so anticlimatic ajkdfladjsf like just content-wise i think that genuinely might have been our worst dainsleif quest the lore was CARRYING this shit and all we got was more questions and it felt SO short

as an aside its also criminal how long apart these quests are bc i honestly already kinda forgot what happened in the previous one (caribert) and i had to like. really use my brain to remember the lore we got then

DAINSLEIF BROTHER????????????

just in general like. my mind was exploding when we were talking about the five sinners of khaenri'ah. i want to learn more about them so bad

"i'll tell you all you want to know" YOU'RE NOT TELLING US ENOUGH DAINSLEIF ELABORATE

WE DESERVED A PROPER DAINSLEIF VS ABYSS TWIN ANIMATED FIGHT CUTSCENE. HOW DARE YOU JUST FADE TO BLACK ARE YOU KIDDINGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

ngl when we first saw caribert i actually thought this might be dainsleif's brother and i was like NOOOOOOOOOO THEY CAN'T NPC DAIN'S BRO

i just KNOWWW his brother is gonna be so sexy whenever they reveal him. sorry i had to say it. anyways.

caribert man... his whole deal honestly felt like a sidequest within the quest but that was sad :(

not to be a #scarastan but i was just thinking so hard about the parallels between caribert and scara, implanting vs removing oneself from the memories of the world. both doing it to bring comfort to others, even if futile. i'm not smart enough to expand on this but i'm sure yall know what i mean

anyways okay. so the loom of fate can weave ley lines, that name makes sense now. now can literally anybody please explain what the fuck yall want to do with it

honestly the twin reunion scene felt kinda. idk. flat? like i was more hyped about the abyss twin vs dainsleif part kadjlsflds (speaking of which the way dain clenched his fist lmaooooooo i was just thinking of that one arthur meme)

i do love the detail that the twins call each other by their canon names though

was kind of 🙄 when we got hit with the "yeah btw you won't remember any of this once we're out of here." okay plot convenience

actually is it even plot convenience? like literally what harm would there have been of the traveler remembering???? what are they gonna do???? the only actionable thing of substance we learned was that the loom of fate was completed which dainsleif should have figured out anyways since he got the eye taken from him????????

actually i think it was great that dainsleif got bamboozled though. dude has been carried by plot armor for too long

sea of flowers mention interesting (i have no thoughts on this just interesting esp since i'm pretty sure that's the place shown in the teyvat trailer)

so basically confirmed the heavenly principles are asleep/inactive for some reason. idr if it was explicitly mentioned before. i actually DID wonder why we didn't get some celestia nail action smiting after all the shit that happened in fontaine, a lot of people thought that was gonna happen too with the whole celestia is floating right over fontaine

and then we wake up and the quest just ends??? LET ME TALK TO DAIN HELLO

also like. why did dain want to confront the abyss twin again??? maybe it was mentioned in an earlier quest and if so i forgot but either way i don't understand wtf dain was up to by luring the abyss twin out

no literally that felt like half a quest

objectively i think that quest kinda sucked but i will forgive it solely because of the lore drops no matter how tiny they were and bc i did really like caribert's story

[twoidiotwriters1]

Daughter of Olympus (Leo Valdez xFem!Oc)

A/N: I won't elaborate on my fancast for Leo it explains itself -Danny Words: 2,152 Series' Masterlist Previous Chapter / Next Chapter Listen to: 'Polaroid' -by Imagine Dragons

VII. Save Money on Valentine's Day, Become Unlovable

"What Luke told you back on the Princess Andromeda, about starting the world from scratch... that really got to you, huh?"

Annabeth makes a face. "My fatal flaw. That's what the Sirens showed me. My fatal flaw is hubris."

"That brown stuff they spread on veggie sandwiches?"

She sighs. "No, Seaweed Brain. That's hummus. Hubris is worse."

"What could be worse than hummus?"

"Hubris means deadly pride, Percy. Thinking you can do things better than anyone else... even the gods."

"You feel that way?"

Annabeth takes a moment before replying. "Don't you ever feel like, what if the world really is messed up? What if we could do it all over again from scratch? No more war. Nobody homeless. No more summer reading homework."

"I'm listening."

"I mean, the West represents a lot of the best things mankind ever did—that's why the fire is still burning. That's why Olympus is still around. But sometimes you just see the bad stuff, you know? And you start thinking the way Luke does: 'If I could tear this all down, I would do it better.' Don't you ever feel that way? Like you could do a better job if you ran the world?"

Percy and I look at each other. "Um... no," he admits. "Me running the world would kind of be a nightmare."

"I agree," Percy gives me a playful glare, but I add: "No, I mean, I don't have what it takes. Leaders have stone-cold hearts."

"Hubris isn't your fatal flaw, then."

"What is?" Percy asks with curiosity.

"I don't know, Percy, but every hero has one. If you don't find it and learn to control it... well, they don't call it 'fatal' for nothing."

I shiver at the thought of having a weak spot that could kill me, but what can be dangerous for a girl like me? As long as I stay out of everyone's way, my flaw has no reason to put me in danger.

When Leo says he wants to look for Festus, Ara decides to join him. It's obvious he doesn't want company, but she won't let him go alone, not when something's after them.

She's half expecting the walk to be awkward. However, Leo's asking so many questions now that it's just the two of them again that she gets comfortable rather quickly. It doesn't feel like she's talking with a stranger, which is weird, not even Percy felt this way so soon into knowing him.

"So, what's your deal, exactly?" He fidgets with a couple of screws. "What does it mean, being the daughter of Olympus?"

"That I protect Olympus."

Leo gives her a sideways glance. "Your job isn't to fight monsters and do quests, then? Is it something more important?"

"You got it backward," she sighs. "That's exactly my job. The gods hand me tasks directly, or used to before they shut down Olympus... I go on quests and lead their armies."

Ara almost sounds bored when she talks about it, but she's only trying to hide how anxious it makes her, to have all that control over her loved ones. She didn't want to boss around her friends, she wanted to be their dependable hero.

"What happens if you fail?" He asks, the screws in his hand are ignored for a moment.

"If I'm breathing and can move, I gotta keep going."

"But my question is what happens when you can't continue a quest?"

Ara stares at him blankly. "If I fail, it means I died, there is no other option. I may be called the daughter of Olympus but the gods are not my caretakers. It hasn't happened though, lucky me."

Leo's amusement quickly vanishes. "Man, so you could die if we fail this quest?"

"Yeah. But I agreed to this."

He hesitates. "You might be a little too insane for my liking, and that's saying a lot..."

"Maybe I am," she heaves a sigh. "But I did it so they would stop using my friends..."

"How old are you?" Leo frowns.

"Fourteen... and a half," she adds as an afterthought.

"What!" He raises his voice. "And you're a General? I don't even have a driver's license!"

"And that's such an impediment now that you're flying a dragon," she replies sarcastically. "Don't be dumb."

"If that's an order, General, I'll have to transgress it," he taunts her. It's crazy how quickly Leo can switch from being upset to acting all funny. "That's the one thing I do perfectly, don't take my dumbness away." 

Ara sighs again, not sharing Leo's easy-going attitude. He tries again, he doesn't know why, but he likes listening to Ara's voice. It soothes him and makes his mind go slower. "So... why did the gods say yes? Why not choose someone older?"

Ara's brows knit together, she's heard this question many times before and knows that it makes sense, but it still annoys her. "I was the only one asking for it. Percy made his wish, and I still had mine, so I used it for this. The children of Olympus had been er... discontinued. I brought them back."

Leo tries to ask the following question without sounding rude, it's not coming easy. "So were you... powerful enough? Is that why they said yes?"

"I was good enough, yeah. It's a slow process, years and years of training. I convinced them 'cause I had a special set of skills."

Leo's hands are back to fidgeting. "What skills?"

Percy hides our ship behind a large rock wall, so in order to get to the top, we have to climb.

"Okay. Who first?"

They glance at me, of course they'd want me to go first, keeping an eye on the weakest link is the wise thing to do, but I'm not looking at them, I'm examining the wall.

"There's a path," I inform my friends.

"What?"

"You're hallucinating, Birdy..."

"No. Follow me."

Usually, when I insist there's something I can do, they let me try. I hold onto the nearest edge, and after that, I just keep going up. I stop only when I hear someone calling my name many feet below me. I look down to discover I don't have vertigo. 

"Why aren't you coming up?" I frown. "It's safe!"

"You're moving too fast, we can't see where you're stepping!" Annabeth pants.

"I'm fast?" I look at my hands. "Cool!"

"You don't use the lava wall back in camp, do you?" Percy raises his voice so I can hear him.

"Silena doesn't let me, she thinks I'll get hurt!"

"Well, I think she has to reconsider!" He grunts.

Festus landed on a pile of portable toilets, and both teens stare at the mess in disgust.

"Talking 'bout good fortune, huh?"

"If we had one of those cranes here it'd be easier..." Leo looks around with a scowl.

"I can climb his back," Ara steps forward, then stops. "Maybe throw snow on it before we..."

"What?" Leo puts his hand on the dragon's surface, then he jumps back. "Oh, right—ouch," he says in a not-so-convincing tone. When he notices the way she's looking at him, he tries to make up an excuse. "I'm very sleep-deprived."

"Stop that."

"Stop what?"

"Lying," she steps closer to him.

He smiles like he finds the conversation absurd. "Doll, I really got no—"

"You may think I'm an air-headed Barbie, but I can tell you're full of shit," Ara seizes his wrist. "I'm tired of you and Piper hiding things from me. Tell me what's your deal, or I'll lock you up in one of the squeezed-out toilets."

Leo complains loudly as Ara squeezes his wrist. "Okay, okay! Dang, you're stronger than you look!" He scoffs. "You have to promise not to freak out, alright?"

"You better be honest," she lets go of him. "Don't worry about me, I've seen a lot of weird stuff."

"Okay..." he rubs his wrist. "I... I make fire," Leo scowls at her. "Now's when you point fingers and call me bad names."

Ara stares at him, her gaze is calculating. "Nyssa told you their superstition, didn't she?"

"No, I just guessed I'm an omen of tragedy and bad fortune!" He replies sarcastically.

"So rough life for you too, huh?" She tilts her head, ignoring his defensive tone. 

Leo nods once, still scowling. "Good ol' demigod life."

"Well, it's not the end of the world, and I would know that. I witnessed like, three of those," she tells him. "Can you make fire out of nothing?"

"Yes," he opens one palm and small orange flames envelop it. "But I don't do this trick at parties, y'know? For obvious reasons."

"Yeah, because you don't get invited," Ara reaches out. It is real fire. "It's okay. Chiron will know how to help you."

"You think he'll want to? Because I'll be honest here, I need the training."

"I'll do it if he doesn't. You won't get better if you don't practice, and I owe it to you," Ara stretches out her palm. "Deal?"

The fire dies on Leo's hand. He stares at her unblinkingly. "You sure? I can be really hard to handle."

"I'll manage," she decides to tease him into shaking her hand. "What, afraid of getting cooties?"

Leo smiles. "Afraid of passing them, actually, but if you insist..." 

He reaches for her hand and shakes it. 

Tyson invites me to help him build Percy and Annabeth's chariot and I'm happy to assist him. We work side by side, and Percy and Annabeth win the race.

"We couldn't have won this race or got the Fleece or saved Grover or anything! We owe our lives to our friends, to..." Annabeth pauses and looks at the Cyclops.

Percy catches my eye and his smile widens. "My baby brother and sister! Tyson and Ara!"

Before I know it, I'm being lifted on someone's shoulders and Tyson's holding my hand. When we reach the winner's platform and I'm placed between Percy and Tyson, I feel accepted unconditionally.

Percy reaches for my hand and squeezes, I make a promise that I'll treat him as my brother forever. "We should talk later," he says under his breath.

He has a strange glint of determination in his eyes. You know when someone says "later" but they mean "never"? Well, Percy isn't that type of person. Later meant fifteen minutes forward.

Chiron and him are waiting for me in the Big House, and Percy's holding a phone. "You have a call, Birdy."

"Did I do something?" I look at Chiron without understanding.

He points at the cell phone. "Don't keep them waiting."

"Hello?" I speak in a little frightened voice. 

"Hi, Ara," my heart does a somersault, it's Sally Jackson.

"Hi!" I reply, too excited to even question why my friend's mom wants to talk to me. "Did Percy tell you about the rock wall? I'm the fastest climber!"

"I heard you helped Tyson build a chariot, too."

"I helped Percy sail a pirate ship too! And I used my Charmspeak with Polyphemus before he could rip off—" My friend shakes his head frantically, so I change the subject. "Why are you calling me?"

Sally takes a moment. 

"Well... Percy and I talked..."

I glance at Percy. "Yeah? About what?"

"You liked staying with us during Christmas, didn't you?"

"Yeah! Can I go this year too?"

"How about staying the whole year?"

I'm sure I misheard that. "Sorry?"

"I've talked to Chiron, and he can help us with the paperwork to make it happen. Percy and I agree, having you around felt right."

"Wait, make what happen?" My heart's crawling up my throat.

"We want to adopt you, Ara."

"I-I'm not an orphan," My face is getting redder.

"We know."

"I told those things to Percy 'cause he asked, I wasn't trying to—I didn't use charmspeak!"

I'm embarrassed. I mean, when your friend hears your sob story and suddenly he's like "Suprise! I'm giving you this thing you told me you wished more than anything!" It kinda feels like he's just shutting you up. I didn't want it if it was out of pity.

"Ara," Percy intercedes. "We have more than enough to welcome a second regular-size kid into our home. Having Tyson around made us realize that."

"But I can't protect you like Tyson," I insist.

"We don't want that," Sally says. "Having you is enough."

They're asking me not only to stick around but also to use their name. Be part of their family forever. 

I look at Chiron with hopeful eyes. 

"Can I?"

Their bodies light up in a golden hue as soon as Leo holds her hand. Ara snatches her palm away in panic, looking at the boy as if he's got two heads.

"What?" Leo stares at her anxiously. "Did I burn you?"

"I'm fine!" She replies high-pitched. "Good talk! Let's—let's fix Festus now!" Ara turns to face the dragon so Leo can't see her blush. 

Gods, if her friends could see her now... No. This is not happening. That was not golden.

"Dammit!" She kicks the snow. 

Leo's climbing the dragon but he stops halfway. "What?"

"I'm having a moment, stay out of it!" She snaps.

The boy stares at her, half-amused and half-worried. "Why are the prettiest girls always so crazy..."

"Shut up!" Ara blushes even more.

She's dreamed about this moment for quite some time, but Leo's timing is downright inconvenient at this point, so denial it is. Ara isn't gonna make things easier. It will be the slowest slow-burn the Fates have ever had the misfortune to witness.

Next Chapter ->

Taglist.

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[the-pjo-analyst]

The Lightning Thief Summary

Here I was thinking I'd finish editing this today and still have plenty of time before the show airs and then they release the episodes early sjkdfhsdkfh

Anyway over a year later and it's done! Thank you for everyone who's been patient with my posts despite taking so long to finish. I'll put a pause on my book analyses so I can focus on reading the Trials of Apollo (I never finished the series,,,,,) so I can finally read all the new content we got this year! Maybe I'll make live posts as I read 👀 I kinda want to make posts about the tv show when it airs too.... we'll see :D

Until then, here's a summary of the first book:

Themes

The concept of home In terms of a physical place, Camp Half-Blood is the biggest example of this, as a sanctuary for demigods who struggle to survive and fit in in the regular world. I find it interesting how in every book something threatens the existence of CHB as a safe place. In this case it's something small, the hellhound that Luke brought in. Luke even says he did it so Chiron would believe camp wasn't safe and send Percy off on a quest. Each threat progressively gets worse, which forces the demigods to go on quests to either directly or indirectly save/help their home. There's also people as a place to call home, like how Sally is to Percy. Funny enough the motif of demigods going on quests to protect their home also applies to here because Percy doesn't accept his quest to save CHB, he does it to save his mom, the only person at that point he felt at home with. Because brain is hardwired to think about percabeth all the time I'll put this out in the open: Percy and Annabeth stand on opposite ends of the "what is home" spectrum at the beginning, Percy's being a person and Annabeth's being a place, and then they kinda switch with Percy finding a home at CHB and Annabeth learning to call her mortal family home. But haha psyche it's actually them growing to call each other home. Like when Percy is on the fence whether to stay at camp for the year or not, a major reason he decides against it is bc Annabeth won't be there. And then Annabeth would never have considered living with her dad again is Percy didn't encourage her.

Supporting others and having support from loved ones This pops up a lot in the book and it's an important driving force for a lot of the characters: Percy having a loving mother, the trio having each other's backs throughout their quest, the trio supporting each other's goals, even Poseidon watching over Percy. When they're at their lowest, when they think about giving up, they all had someone who picked them back up, someone who eased the pain a little, and that helped them keep going and lift them up. On the topic of Percy vs Luke, this is a major point that distinguishes the two as heroes. Percy has a support system that he can fall back to when he makes mistakes or bad things happen to him while Luke doesn't, not really. Although it's hard to tell from Percy's pov whether Luke had any close friends or not, it doesn't seem like he had anyone to confide in (at least after Thalia). He's left to stew in his negative emotions, another reason why he was so easy to be manipulated.

Identity Maybe too early to really talk about this, but the first book introduces this idea of how characters identify themselves, and especially who they identify with. Demigods being categorized demigods by their godly parent and also them choosing whether to identify by that or not. On the flip side, demigods feeling lost or not seen when they either aren't claimed or don't have a cabin to truly call theirs. There's also Annabeth who practically grew up in this system and internalized it, and came to find there's more to the world than just who your godly parent is. And Percy on the opposite side again lmao, who considers himself Sally Jackson's son first and foremost, and then learns to accept Poseidon in his life in whatever form it entails.

Worship of the gods and broken systems Probably the most important theme to the plot line of the series. I talked a lot about this in terms of Percy vs Luke for my ch 21 and 22 posts, essentially how demigods' over-reliance on the gods breeds a flawed and defective system. A subtheme for this is the gods and responsibility: who gets blamed for the actions of the gods? are the gods obligated to claim and acknowledge their children? I think what makes Percy the perfect Child of the Prophecy is that he has never relied on the gods as omniscient and almighty beings to give him what he needs, he instead relies on his own power, and that allows him to work with the gods to create change in future books. He never had a moment where he worshiped the gods and also never had a moment of disillusionment bc he was immediately thrust into a situation that revealed out broken the system was as soon as he was brought into the world of immortals. He sees the gods and their world as they are, both the good and the bad.

Characters

Percy: I'll just summarize his core qualities since I talk too much about this kid 😂: Percy is strong-minded and doesn’t back down easily, he has high integrity, he’s incredibly loyal to his friends and stands up for them, he heavily relies on his instincts and is impulsive, he's also very street-smart! he's impertinent lol and doesn't take well to authority if he feels it isn’t deserving or fair, he loves loves loves his mom, he always fights to protect, he has an incredibly low self-esteem and desires others to see beyond the trouble that follows him, he doesn't like "bothering" people with his problems. His sass and spite probably formed as a defense mechanism against his low self-esteem and the abusive environment he grew up in. It's interesting reading the book while fully looking at Percy's characteristics in terms of how growing up with Gabe affected him. For example, if he had a stable home, would his self esteem be as low as it is?

This pops up at the end and becomes hugely important in the later books, but Percy tends to take on responsibilities way too personally and they tend to become fixations. After Luke's betrayal, Percy is like I have to go find him and I can't just sit around while Luke is planning to destroy the world. He's like,,,, proactive to a fault.

Traits he probably gets as a child of Poseidon bc I love discussions that try to pinpoint this: the inability regulate strong emotions, like his temper; his brooding expression that gives him the air of a troublemaker and loose canon; his difficultly in following the rules; obv his love of beaches too.

Annabeth: As I've said before, Annabeth makes a good foil for Percy as the logical and book-smart person to Percy's heavy emotions and instincts. She's introduced as someone who's opposing to Percy in almost every way: someone who's entire world is her godly parent and the immortal world, who relies on her brain first before anything else, who's a bit manipulative, who's very confident in her abilities. But they also have some similarities: where Annabeth has faced lots of abandonment and Percy has faced a lot of rejection, and from these experiences they both have come to desire acknowledgement of their worth and the good in them. And they come to find these things in each other. It's also important to note how they learn from one another on their quest, like Percy starting to form strategies in his battles and Annabeth finding that the immortal world isn't everything.

Annabeth's aspirations and fatal flaw are very much tied together, since she's learned growing up that she can only rely on herself to do things right, plus having incredible pride as a child of Athena, led to her developing hubris. And it goes hand-in-hand with her desire for something permanent since she's never had something stable prior to arriving at camp. Her dream to be an architect allows her to both create something that will last eternity and make her stamp on the world.

Grover: The growth for Grover is a little less prominent compared to Percy and Annabeth. He's introduced as being meek with low-confidence but he has Big Dreams for that Tiny Body. It's really because he has Percy and Annabeth that he's able to grow and gain more confidence in himself, without them his aspirations would just be a pipe dream (I'm sorry I made an accidental pun lol). Grover rises to the occasion because he has people who believe in him and frequently tell him so and he also wants to meet those expectations. And that support takes physical form at the end of the book, both with Grover gaining his searcher license and him getting a growth spurt. You can see with your eyes how much he's matured, filling into the shoes of the person he wants to be in a literal sense.

Luke: Whereas Annabeth is different from Percy in every way but the ones that really matter, Luke is similar to Percy in every aspect except ones that really matter. He's a very caring and supportive person, so much so that he takes Percy under his wing when no one else does when Percy arrives at camp. He sees a broken system in the immortal world and wants something better for demigods. And yet he's also incredibly selfish, he leans more into putting himself and his desires first before anything else. He had relied too much on the gods to fix and provide everything and becomes bitter when that doesn't happen. Despite being a source of support for others, he doesn't have that for himself. And because of these differences, Luke is way more susceptible to Kronos' influence than Percy is. Kronos can offer glory and power and self gratification, and where Percy would refuse because it goes against his morals and who he is (someone who thinks about others before himself), Luke is more likely to be swayed.

Honestly Luke seems like a "what if" in comparison to Percy. What if Percy lost his mom? What if he was left at camp when he was younger? What if Percy never found a support system? All the examples I'm thinking of boil down to Percy having a parental figure that guides him and teaches him important lessons, while Luke doesn't lmao.

There's two sides in Luke, love vs anger, kindness vs selfishness, gods vs titans, celestial bronze vs steel, and this conflict appears frequently throughout the series. I want to see what moments this conflict shows itself in the later books!

Other things to keep in mind for the series when I continue reading and other notes:

Does Percy have claustrophobia? Or does it only show up at St Louis lol

The parallels between Percy and Luke

Ways Percy and Annabeth get closer and learn from one another

[B2 Summary]

[thefirstknife]

i love how lightfalls story will continue in Deep and the rest of the year and it's a great move

ut god i WISH they had that idea for Witch Queen. I NEED to know how the Lucent Hive are developing, there's so much we don't know, andi would love to see how they're developing on like a cultural level.

My biggest disappointment with Witch Queen year is that after the dlc & risen the Lucent Brood are basically treated as regular hive that we can kill with no problem's and like nothing is exploring them anymore

I know its not the case but it felt like Bungie was building to this like:

"Are the Hive brutal and reprehensible to us? Yes. Will they change their behavior with the Light? No. Do they still deserve to be treated as sentient ppl with Intrinsic 'humanity' even tho they arent as sympathetic like the Fallen or Cabal? Yes. Does that make them good guys? Do we have the right to kill Ghosts just because they made the crime of "choosing the wrong side" etc etc

And like make us realize everything is more gray. and make us ask questions about assumptions we had, are Ghosts allowed Autonomy? Do.we have an inherent deserving of the light etc

and then Bungie dropped it in a bin and never brought it up ever again not even in flavor text or lore tabs

Agreed 100%

Witch Queen was an absolute banger of a campaign that I consider pretty much flawless, but when it comes to the whole year of Destiny last year, a lot of it ended up falling flat. There are so many interesting things raised in the campaign, but they were never explored. It didn't truly feel like "Witch Queen year" since pretty much all most significant bits of the Witch Queen were not explored.

Most importantly the Lucent Hive. Even in Risen, they were kind of background. They were literally attacking Earth directly and killing Guardians, but outside of getting rid of a few pockets of them, they've not been mentioned outside of that? Are they still attacking Earth? Do they still try to get a fort on the Moon? Are they only listening to Immaru or are there other aspects of their leadership? What about Lucent Hive who decide to go their own way? We know they exist so what's up with them?

What about Immaru and Savathun in general? We've not tried capturing him or investigating more into what Savathun knew, how she constructed the Throne World, how she utilised Light, her connections to the Witness and the Fleet... Obviously this might get picked up when she's rezed again, but I feel like a lot of it would've been important in the aftermath of the campaign. We got minor tidbits when Osiris woke up, but that just raised more questions; Savathun knew some WILD shit and we never investigated it.

We'll see how this continuation of Lightfall's story will go next season. I'm hoping for a quest that deals with some of the aftermath of the campaign and gives us insight into how time progresses in-universe; have the characters learned anything new in the past three months? Osiris will be present so we might get some new insight into Strand or the Veil or the portal the Witness opened.

Obviously, that's best case scenario. We have no clue what the quest will be like and I don't want to overhype myself and expect some incredibly long mission with 4 lore books, but the general gist of adding more campaign content throughout the year is really good. In hindsight, I would've loved if we got that each year. Campaigns are fine as is to me, but adding more content throughout the year that's directly connected to the campaign (instead of seasons) would've been a real benefit to pretty much every year so far. I really like the idea of the expansion YEAR dealing with the expansion reveals and information for the whole year in a more direct way that isn't tied to seasons.

[lunaetis]

following the post i made about eden's changes in demeanor and personality, i want to write out what are the factors that contributed to this change. so i'm going to dissect her personality and development from the beginning and how she is at each point in time ( at least the major ones ) to paint a clearer picture. it's going to be a very long read, so i'll put it under a read more.

awakening - eden was awakened by having the stellaron infused into her. her personality was blank. she was a blank canvas. her first exposure was kafka. we know kafka used her spirit whisper to influence eden's actions and decisions after this but we saw eden show attachment towards her. i'd like to think that it came from her body remembering things her mind no longer did. we learned from kafka later on that she wiped eden's memory, but that process was still fresh, so while her mind did not remember, her body did. she reached out to kafka. to the only one she still had attachment to. after that, her second awakening left her at a blank state.

astral express / herta space station - the next exposure are the astral express and people within herta space station. during this time, eden was shown to be majorly expressionless. she was stoic, barely showed any emotions on her face. she was still learning about the world, about the people, about emotions. we saw her slowly becoming more animated, but she was extremely quiet and instinctual. all in all, this period of time had eden exposed to positive influence. this was why eden started off trusting. she saw people of the astral express helping others, and later on they accepted her as one of their own despite knowing nothing about her. this was a major positive influence to her. her personality was a curious one. she wanted to see and know everything.

jarilo-vi / belobog - this was where we saw the astral express' influence on eden quite clearly. while eden was still rather quiet and not expressive, we saw her slowly opening up. she was adapting what the astral express had taught her. to trust others, and to help others. people she met on jarilo-vi also influenced the same thinking and strengthen it. she felt accepted when she helped others. she felt that trusting others is the right thing to do. this was her decision to do it, to help people, to make sure they're free. and it paid off to have faith and trust in people even though she just met them. she started to gain more personality to be more blunt, forward, and honest. to speak her mind, and see the good in people. she was akin to a cheerful, hopeful puppy, if you will.

xianzhou luofu - this was where things started to get real. the events in xianzhou luofu exposed eden to many kinds of people. you still saw her employing the same mentality of wanting to help others as much as possible. accompanied by welt and march really encouraged her to do that. what shook her belief was when kafka revealed the truth that everything that was happening was planned from the beginning. this was the first seed of doubt in eden's mind. this was when she started to question EVERYTHING up to this point. what she believed to have been her decision was all lies. everything was orchestrated to achieve the best possible future. elio had foreseen everything, she was simply walking a path prepped for her. from this point on, eden developed an insecurity about herself, her identity, and her purposes. it was her first exposure to deception and lies.

simulated universe / ruan mei's story quest - i'm going to group her exposure to herta space station into one section because they're all related. so, eden was recruited by herta to help test simulated universe in order to learn more about aeons. she agreed to do so because it was interesting and eden herself also wanted to learn more about aeons as well. herta and screwllum were also quite pleasant to be around. however, when she met ruan mei for the first time, the fact that she wasn't given a full information on what she would be facing, how she had to go down there alone, and to face a kind of danger that if it weren't for the creation disappearing on its own, she might not have made it out safely. for my eden, at least, that was another turning point where she felt used and manipulated. she was lied to in order to get results. the trust and faith she had been placing in people were starting to backfire.

penacony - and here we are, the triggering event to the change. eden was already treading the thin line of the concept of trust. up to this point, she had always been honest with her words, with her demeanor, giving people the benefit of the doubt, and being optimistic, being helpful, being hopeful. once again, that trust backfired greatly in more ways than one. the attachment she developed for firefly was, as i mentioned before, born from the fact that it was the first time that she felt normal. it was the first time she felt like she was bonding with someone without being influenced by the knowledge of her as the stellaron vessel. so it was a strong attachment because she felt like she had connected to someone as eden. losing firefly triggered her disassociation to reality for a moment, and the events that followed as she was told that everything was, once again, a game set by multiple parties and she ( along with the astral express members ) were pieces of the puzzle. now, they must learn the truth. the details were hazy for eden after witnessing firefly's death because ... lies. once again, lies and deception and manipulation. it never ends. and she felt like she couldn't trust anyone on penacony. at all. at this point, eden was proven by the loss of someone she grew attached to at her core, that trusting others blindly was a grave mistake. she cannot, and should not place her trust in people like that any longer, or else she would be used. like she had been multiple times before.

she had been so naïve to think that she could protect those she cared for if she tried hard enough. that as the vessel for the stellaron, she had the power to keep those she cared for safe. that illusion was shattered by witnessing death not once, but twice right before her eyes ( firefly and robin. ) it wasn't enough. she wasn't enough. the stellaron wasn't enough. faith, and trust, and hope, were nowhere near enough.

and it triggered the change as defense mechanism. i mentioned this before in the previous post, that her mind had decided to adopt the change in order to keep going. the journey was barely beginning. she knew she still had a long way to go, and being carefree and trusting aren't going to cut it anymore. she has to be more careful. she has to change. she has to grow up. to think more. to observe more. to watch her words. to know when to lie and when to not. to know how to protect herself in order to protect others. and to protect herself, she had to keep distance. she had to be more analytical. she cannot be driven by pure emotions anymore.

this change, of course, is still something that is subjected to change as story progresses. but with the exposures and experience she had up to this point, this was something eden felt she had to do to keep herself sane enough to go on without breaking. and, i also want to point out that the rare times the astral express weren't with her ( simulated universe / ruan mei's quest / penacony ) were the time that eden got hit by negative influence and viewpoint. i say penacony because they were separated and eden basically went through the events mostly by herself. basically, i want to say that the astral express is the one major positive influence and a sort of anchor for eden. without them, she's prone to spiral down a more negative path and development.

there are, of course, many other side quests, companion quests, and stories that could be included but i'm picking the trailblaze / main story quests as the main influences and exposures that eden had gone through. this is my own interpretation and how i choose to write eden, my trailblazer. it doesn't reflect what we see of the trailblazer in canon and only my own version of her.

if you make it this far and read everything, I LOVE YOU AND I APPLAUD YOUR PATIENCE for going through that ramble. thank you for tolerating my wall of china text on the ( traumatized™ ) space raccoon !

[rachellaurengray]

The Illusion of Control: Breaking Free (trigger warning)

Many of us have faced moments where we felt overwhelmed by the need to control aspects of our lives. For some, this manifests in extreme behaviors around exercise and eating. I want to share a story that might resonate with many of you—a story of finding oneself trapped in a cycle of control and the journey to break free.

The Need for Control: A Common Struggle

It all starts with a common struggle: a desire for control in a world that often feels chaotic. For me, this need turned into an obsession with exercise and diet. I found solace in the rigid structure of my daily routines. Spending hours working out each day, fasting, and then eating around 8 PM became my way of managing the chaos in my life.

This isn’t just my story. Many people use exercise and strict dietary habits as a way to cope with stress or emotional turmoil. It’s a way to impose order when other areas of life feel out of control.

The Paradox of Control: Loving Food, Yet Feared

Ironically, despite my love for food, my relationship with it became fraught with anxiety. After carefully planning my meals, I’d indulge only to feel a deep sense of guilt. This guilt often led to destructive behaviours and self-talk that seemed like a way to regain control. This paradox—loving something yet fearing it—can feel incredibly isolating.

If you’ve ever found yourself caught in a similar cycle, you’re not alone. Many people experience this conflict between their desires and their fears, creating a constant internal battle.

The Cycle of Control: From Empowerment to Entrapment

The pursuit of control can start with good intentions but quickly becomes an all-consuming force. What was once empowering—structuring my workouts and meals—turned into a rigid routine that dominated my life. The quest for control can easily become a trap where the initial sense of mastery turns into a source of suffering.

This cycle can feel like a prison, where every effort to control one aspect of life leads to losing control over another. Recognizing this entrapment is a crucial step in the journey towards healing.

Breaking Free: A Collective Journey

Breaking free from this cycle involves more than just altering habits; it requires a deeper understanding of the underlying need for control. It’s about acknowledging that the quest for control often masks deeper issues, such as anxiety, low self-esteem, or unresolved trauma.

For many, seeking help from a mental health professional is a vital step. Therapy can provide tools to address these issues and develop healthier relationships with food and exercise. It’s about learning to embrace balance rather than perfection.

Finding Balance: The Path Forward

The journey to balance is ongoing and personal. It involves shifting focus from rigid control to flexible, mindful living. Enjoying food without guilt, exercising for health rather than punishment, and allowing oneself to experience life’s unpredictability are key aspects of this balance.

This collective journey towards balance is shared by many. It’s a process of learning to navigate the tension between control and freedom, and finding peace in the imperfections of life.

Conclusion: Embracing the Journey Together

The illusion of control can be powerful, but it’s essential to recognize when it’s causing more harm than good. For those who find themselves in this cycle, know that you are not alone. By seeking support and working towards balance, we can all move towards a healthier and more fulfilling relationship with ourselves and our bodies. Let’s embrace the journey together, finding strength in our shared experiences and the hope for a balanced future.